#but there is no way i want this to show up in the actual tag
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jaypelt · 3 days ago
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Normally I'm the sorta person that puts things in the tags, but it's difficult to deliver the thoughts I want without it just running on too long. I'm personally not in the position to make sweeping judgements of how *audiences* prefer shows, as I've kinda tapped out of that whole thing and pay less attention to takes on media. Although expecting instant trauma and emotion sounds ridiculous. - In the Fullmetal Alchemist manga they don't even show the big Human Transmutation Moment until like... 23 chapters in. It's just dripfed up to that point. - You don't understand all of the specifics as to why Mr. Harrier Du Bois drunk himself into amnesia until you piece it all together from experience throughout the whole game. Culminating in Dolores Dei on the last day. - Kurapika's ice cold demeanor is as disturbing as it is because you've seen how much kinder he can be, and how far he's fallen since earlier in the story. It's not simply the things that happen to him either, but the actions he DECIDES to take. All of these examples present characters who clearly wear some kind of Big Shit on their sleeves, yet it isn't all given to you immediately. And with proper leadup to their emotional moments. Granted, they come from media outside of strictly western TV shows, but I think the lack of patience from both writers and the audience can represent themselves in any media. The goal is to make you *feel bad*, or feel at least feel *something*. And the idea is that this makes a story or character more compelling. How do you hook an audience? You hit em where it hurts. And sometimes it feels as if there's a certain gut punch feeling they're looking for. But there needs to be something of substance to actually CARE about. You need to build up your characters, your world, your story, before you start making people feel something. Especially in the case of characters, you need to establish who they actually ARE and what they care about. It doesn't always have to be the trauma. And trauma can take many, many forms. Negligence, despondence, listlessness, etc. The way they respond to it is often informed by the kind of person they are, even if that part of them may irrevocably change afterwards. Some may not even realize they've experienced it to begin with and are unaware of how it has shaped them. Characters are the beating heart of any story. Any good one is more than just all the trauma you can load them up with. Your plot can be mid as fuck, yet people cherish it anyway because the characters are good. Which, by god, can take form in more ways placing them in cold drop dramatic moments or delving into their backstory from the get-go. And every story needs a little time to breathe. Space out the big moments, build up to them when appropriate. Too much is emotionally exhausting at best, and feels insulting or manipulative at worst.
Man is it just me or are a lot of TV shows nowadays are written to have big emotional episodes in scenes with very little build up.
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runninriot · 2 days ago
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Backstage Romance (I Want It Bad)
written for @steddiesongfics
song: Backstage Romance (Moulin Rouge! The Musical) | rated: E | wc: 7.018 | tags: Rockstar Eddie Munson, Manager Steve Harrington, Famous Corroded Coffin, secret hookups, dom/sub undertones, angst, smut, ambiguous/open ending | complete fic on ao3
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Eddie is buzzing, high on adrenaline like always when they’re playing a show. He’s still not used to this, it’s still something he can’t quite wrap his head around – to watch people dance and sing along to their songs, to hear their roaring applause and deafening whistles, to know they’re here for them.
It’s electrifying.
A fucking dream.
They’re still considered newcomers but Corroded Coffin are finally climbing their way out of the gutter; they’re making it, step by step, and one day not too far in the future, they’ll be on top.
It’s all Eddie ever wanted, all he and his best friends have always fantasized about back when they were still a bunch of loser kids dreaming of becoming rockstars while terrorising Gareth’s poor parents (and the whole neighbourhood, really) with the horrible noise coming from their garage.
The dream is reality now, success not only a possibility but a fact. It would be poison for Eddie's already too big ego but thankfully, there's always someone bringing him back down to earth when he gets carried away.
They’ve got a label now, signed record deal and all and-
   “Great show, guys! The people seemed to really love the new song.”
Yeah, and that. They’ve got a manager now, too.
Steve Harrington.
The guy whose appearance makes him stick out like a sore thumb from the sea of blacks and greys and dark reds around him. The guy who doesn’t look the part but actually likes what they do. The guy who doesn’t give two fucks about what others think of him because he’s not here to make friends, he’s here to do his job. And he’s pretty good at that.
Good at a lot of things.
At first, Eddie hated the idea of having a fucking babysitter on tour with them. Someone to watch their every move, someone to keep them out of trouble (where’s the fun in that?), to make sure they don’t fuck up their reputation. Someone to handle all their business affairs for them, as if they couldn’t take care of it themselves.
Now, Eddie’s actually glad they have someone to deal with everything – from interview requests and setting up their tour schedule to negotiating their contracts and booking their gigs. Steve handles it all, allowing the band to enjoy the fruits of their labour without having to deal with the annoying parts of being in the music business.
And that should be all there is to it. Just a business relation based on what’s in the band’s best interest.
But it’s not.
Not behind the curtains, backstage, when no one is looking. Where, hidden in dark corners, Steve and Eddie share a secret.
A secret that could ruin it all.
Because it’s unprofessional, could get them both in trouble. Could get Steve fired, possibly. Maybe even put Eddie’s – if not the whole band’s – career on the line if the public ever found out about it.
But that just makes it even more thrilling.
Eddie has always been drawn to that, the forbidden, things that could cause irreparable damage. And throughout his life, he’s come to ask himself more than once if this is really worth it. If it’s worth risking it all just for giving in to his reckless impulses.
But the answer has always been the same. Now even more so than ever.
He knows it’s wrong, dangerous, a game he shouldn’t be playing because playing with fire will get him burned.
The problem is that he’s a sucker for the pain.
And being ruined by Steve Harrington is worth everything.
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continue reading here
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heavenlyraindrops · 2 days ago
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The Devil Made Me Do It | Arcane | Silco x Reader | Chapter Two
also available on AO3 and Quotev | visit the first tag to find all chapters | warnings: pre-s1 (for now), profanity, child adoption. Please like, comment and reblog to show support! <3
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summary:
In the midst of an unfortunate run-in with the enforcers, you meet the young revolutionary Silco, and by extension, his friends Vander and Felicia. Growing close friends, you get through life in the undercity together, determined to make Zaun a better place. Until tragedy strikes, and betrayal and carelessness stabs hard enough to turn you bitter. Years later as time solidifies the scars, Silco proves to be a thorn in your side. You, in his. Hatred festers. And your world cracks further open.
Chapter Two:
You didn’t have anyone.
You were looking for company.
The Last Drop was loud and rowdy- just as you’d expected of a bar. Although you didn’t go to many very often.
You pushed through the crowd, resisting the urge to shrink in on yourself and instead holding your head high, setting your jaw. You’d made it to the counter, and you firmly planted your hands on the wood, pushing yourself forward to catch the bartender’s attention.
The burly man looked at you, and came over. You had to raise your voice to be heard.
“I- uh…” you looked around, words suddenly lost.
“What’ll it be?”
“Silco…”
The bartender stared at you. “What?”
You pursed your lips. “I’m looking for Silco. Would he happen to be here? By any chance?”
The bartender raised an eyebrow. “He didn’t tell me he had a lady friend.”
“A lady- what? No, I’m just an acquaintance. Is he here?”
The bartender shook his head, letting out a chuckle which was drowned out by the din of the bar. “He’s a close friend of mine. I can tell him you were looking for him tomorrow. Any message you want to relay?”
You thought for a moment. “…Not really. Although-“ A smoke on the rooftop would be nice. “I’d rather talk to him myself, actually.”
The bartender raised his eyebrow without another word, and nodded. “He always hangs around here in the afternoon. Has nothing better to do with his time, the man,” he joked. You made yourself laugh, and thanked him.
You squared your shoulders. “And while I’m here, I suppose I might as well get something. So, uh… gin and tonic, please. Without the gin.”
The man looked at you rather askance at your peculiar request, but didn’t say anything as he served up a glass of tonic. You smiled thinly, looking around at the establishment as he wiped down a glass.
“So how do you know Silco?” He asked you.
You turned your head towards him. You didn’t expect him to start conversation. He looked at you with a glance of curiosity.
“I don’t,” you say. He frowned.
“So how come you’re asking for him?”
“Well, I mean- I do know him. We met yesterday.” You took a sip of the tonic, and it took  the bartender a moment to realise you weren’t planning on elaborating. “How do you know him?”
“He’s pretty much my brother,” the bartender said simply. He extended a hand, and you shook it. “I’m Vander.”
You nodded slowly. “…Vander.” You thought for a moment. “I’m [name].”
“Nice meeting you. Stop by at four tomorrow, will ya?” He watched as you downed your cup and set it on the counter, tossing him the money and nodding.
With that, you left the Last Drop.
-
You found Silco sitting on the steps outside the Last Drop at four in the afternoon the next day. He looked up at you, and you raised your eyebrows in surprise.
“Silco!” You gasped. “Oh, uh, what are you doing here?”
A languid sweep of his hand brushed the hair out of his eyes. “You asked for me.” He said, voice sounding bored. But there was a twinkle of amusement in his eyes.
You scoffed, shuffling your feet. “Hardly asked.”
“You were looking for me.”
“You told me to stop by!”
He stood up, dusting off his clothes. “Indeed I did. Lonely, are you?”
“As I’ve said already,” you muttered, following him as he made his way through the street. Before long you’d both found yourself on a rooftop, a cigarette in between you.
“Who’s Vander?”
“He’s like my brother.”
Wow. 
“Right.” You looked out across the streets. “Did your… business from last night get…resolved?”
He nodded, a small smirk playing at his lips as he thought back. “It did.”
“And you're sure it wasn’t a prostitute.”
He scoffed, as you giggled at his reaction. “I’m sure.” He turned to watch you laugh, back pressed against the rusted tin as you laid back, and blew a steady stream of smoke into the air.
And then he sighed.
This became a usual routine. One or the other of you would find each other on the rooftop, and would sit there talking until one person had to leave. He wasn’t half bad company, you realized. And sitting there against the sky and smoke felt nice. It was nice to have someone to talk to for reasons other than necessity or business.
One day on a walk home from an errand, the dark blue of the night sky creeping behind the clouds, you heard whimpering from an alleyway. You froze, unsure of what to do. Run? Stay? The sniffling picked up, descending into sobs. 
You burst into the alley.
A little girl, scraped and bloodied, stared at you with wide glassy eyes. You looked back at her.
“What’s your name?” You asked gently, crouching down and wiping the tears and dirt from her bruised face.
“Alice,” she choked out. You felt a tug at your heart, a painful wrench that was hard to ignore. You swallowed a lump. 
“What happened, Alice?”
“Th-they… my mommy…” she started trembling again, and you exhaled slowly, hushing her. “They took her.”
“What about your daddy?” You whispered, carding your fingers through her mousy brown hair.
She raised her head. You followed her gaze.
Piltover.
You lip curled in disgust. Some Piltie must have had an affair with a trencher- a Zaunite, and wanted to get rid of the evidence. No doubt. You gathered the girl in your embrace.
You could hardly support a child, let alone take one in…
“The men were following me,” she told you.
“Let’s go,” you replied. You could hardly support a child.
“Where?”
“Home.”
-
You found him perched on the roof, and climbed up to meet him.
“Silco!” You hissed. He looked at you, frowning at your expression as you collapsed in a heap next to him.
“What’s wrong?” He grabbed your shoulders, eyes welling with concern.
“Silco, there’s a girl. Her father’s from Piltover and they had her mother killed and they’re after her, and I found her and I have no idea what to do with her-“
“Shh, calm down.” He stopped your exhilarated rambling short, and leaned back, taking a moment to think. You watched him, unable to speak.
“Well, if you can’t raise her…”
“I’m not leaving her to die,” you said sharply.
He looked at you skeptically. “And what exactly will you do then? Can you even afford to raise a child?”
“I’ll figure something out.” You sounded unsure.
He looked at you tiredly. “[name]…”
“I’m not leaving her to die,” you said with finality.
He looked at you silently, then nodded. “I’ll… I’ll help where I can.”
You flushed. “You don’t have to.”
He took your hand, and shook his head. “We’re friends.”
You flushed deeper, and looked away, taking a shaky breath. “I’m sorry.”
He looked at you. “What?”
“I’m sorry, all you’ve ever done is help me and all I’ve done is… steal your cigarettes.”
At this he laughed, but one look at your face and he realized you were being serious. “It’s not like that.”
“But it is.”
He fell silent, and you knew he couldn’t deny what you had stated was the fact. But then he spoke. “You give me company.”
You laughed. “That’s it?”
“I don’t care about the enforcer chase, or the cigarettes. You know if I didn’t want to be around you I wouldn’t bother. So stop saying random shit and just…” he took a deep breath and dragged his hand across his face. “God, you’re insufferable sometimes.”
Despite the insult, your insides glowed, and you smiled. “Thank you, Silco.”
“Did you just hear me? I called you insufferable.” 
You nodded, still beaming. “Thanks.”
He scoffed, a small smile on his face. “You idiot.” He took out another cigarette, and, as usual, you held out your lighter. He looked at you, and passed you the lit cigarette to have first.
“And you’re sure you don’t consider me as charity work?” You said before a long drag of the cigarette. You passed it back to him, and he stared at you, confused.
“What? I- of course not.”
“Why are we here then?”
“You’re my friend. You were looking for me that day, remember?”
“You immediately decided we were going to…” you waved your hand around. “Whatever this is. Hanging out. What if I wanted something else?”
He rolled his eyes, blowing out some smoke. “What else would you want? I told you to come find me if you wanted company.” He jabbed the cigarette in your direction. “This is company. And I believe we just talked about this?”
You ignored his last comment. “Well, why are you keeping me company?”
He laughed. “You’re my friend. And I get bored too, you know.”
“You have Vander. I’m sure you have others.”
He suddenly looked at you piercingly. You squirmed. Had you said the wrong thing? But then he shook his head slowly, visibly relaxed. “Right, but none of them are…” he stopped himself, face turning slightly pink. “What I mean to say is, it’s nice to know some other people.”
You leaned close and gently prised the cigarette from his fingers, and he looked up at you. You grinned, then placed it in between your lips. Inhaled. Took it from your lips. Exhaled. He blinked as the smoke billowed in his face.
“Thanks,” you smiled. He looked away, miffed. 
“We won’t talk about this anymore.”
“‘Course.”
“You know my answer.”
“I do.”
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bluedalahorse · 2 days ago
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I feel like there’s some meaningful stuff here about Sara and August’s relationship, so I wanted to reblog and lift those up here! Sara has traditionally been unfairly slammed by the fandom, even though her actions were meaningfully different from August’s in season 2. And a lot of times saraugust is held up as this ontologically evil foil to wilmon, even though both pairings juxtapose the capacity to be sweet and loving with some pretty intense teenage flaws.
Personally, while I understand why they happen, I’ve always been a little wary of discussions of “is Sara a bad person/is August a bad person.” I understand why this framing works for some fans, but it doesn’t work for me. Mostly because a while back, Omar was talking in an interview, and he talked about Lisa’s writing philosophy being that there aren’t good and bad people in her stories, there are people in her stories who are capable of good and bad actions. Now, authorial intent can only go so far, I get that. But I do think this is a theme that underpins the series. I think they did a great job of showing Sara’s complexity and growth over the season. I do think there were some fumbles to August’s writing in season 3 that led a portion of the audience to believe he never changed, ever, over the course of the series. I think the show would have benefitted from him and Simon having a chance to do restorative work outside of their relationships with Wille. At the same time, I don’t think season 3 was without growth for August. @sflow-er’s post on the Fleabag parallel does a great job of breaking down August’s arc. I’m not saying any of this negates the harm August does—far from it—but I do think the show is inviting us to envision a better future for August where he grows and changes, especially in our fanworks.
And that’s what I want to talk about in this reblog: fanworks. It’s been a long time since people were acknowledging the saraugust nuance in season 2, and ultimately how fascinating the pairing is, but there’s still only 96 fics tagged Sara/August on AO3 and only a few are actually about them.
I think, what I’m sad about most when it comes to Young Royals fandom, is that there is no fanworks community around Sara and August the way there is for wilmon, at least on tumblr. There are individual people who are interested in their dynamic, and some of them create fanworks from time to time, and some of us reach out to one another and have meaningful and wonderful one-on-one conversations in our inboxes. But there’s very few reblog chains about them where people are just expressing fun headcanons, there’s very little circulating fanart, there’s some gifsets and edits but they don’t circulate as frequently, no fandom events or challenges themed around them, no following and cheering on of Malte and Frida’s careers, (to my knowledge) no epic multichapter saraugust fics we discuss together and swoon over and make starry eyes over.
To be clear: I don’t think I’d ever expect saragust to have the same size of following wilmon does. There are many factors that make wilmon more popular, first and foremost being that August does real legitimate harm and is annoying and kind of sucks. Like, hey! I get it! Not everyone is going to like him, and that’s perfectly okay. And then there’s the fact that not everyone who’s drawn to an m/m show is going to feel excited to ship a f/m pairing. As @crownedwille points out, fandoms sure can do some stuff when female characters are involved. Of course saraugust will get smaller numbers.
But as someone who’s been tracking the saraugust breadcrumbs in fandom for a while, and has been following their tag on AO3, what I’m noticing is not exactly a natural absence of interest in the pairing. It’s more like I see a lot of people who have an interest in the characters and the dynamics, but something about the way YR fandom interacts socially reinforces the notion that you keep your saraugust feelings to yourself. Or, for a while if you were expressing those feelings, you were encouraged to express them in ways that are full of apologies and disclaimers. When you’re spending all your time doing that, it becomes a lot harder to create fanworks. Like, even in the tags of this post, I see a lot of people saying they liked them or found them interesting or cute or they’re hooked in by the drama or whatever else! Clearly the enjoyers exist and are out there. I think the discourse (and the harassment of actors/writers/creative team on social media) has died down a lot since the finale and there’s more space to like the characters, but I also think that some of the patterns of fandom interaction that sprung up post-S2 have had a continued impact on how people express themselves.
And yes, it’s important to be mindful of the morally dubious sides of this pairing, but we can do that while creating space for people to openly enjoy it through fic and headcanons and edits and such the way that many people in the fandom openly enjoy wilmon, even if it’s a smaller group of us. (Heck, some people enjoy saraugust because of the moral dubiousness and that is part of a Valid Fandom Tradition of enjoying morally dubious pairings.)
As someone who’s currently feeling a little burned out on wilmon by itself and doesn’t really have a desire to read works centered on them, but who’s still in love with the broader YR world and its characters, especially my two favorite characters—I am desperate for a little bit less saraugust discourse and a little bit more joyous fannishness about them. I’m not entirely sure how to make that happen. I’ve been writing fic, blogging about the characters, creating ask games, posting pictures of the plushies, and also doing some other stuff behind the scenes. But I often don’t post or reblog as much as I could for fear of discourse returning, and I feel disconnected from fandom most of the time, even though I have some strong individual ties to individual people. (I also feel like I may have burned some bridges at times when I was upset.) It’s a bit of a sisyphean conundrum, isn’t it? I wish I could wave a magic wand and make more fanworks and community happen around this pairing in particular, but also around other pairings and characters on the show for the fans who want those other pairings and characters. I just wish there was a little more variety in the characters and pairings talked about.
Anyway, I don’t have any answers and it’s time for me to acquire groceries for the week, so. Blue out.
There's so much discourse around Sara and August. Whether they were good together or not. Whether they loved each other or not.
What we tend to overlook is the fact that they talked to each other. Enough that they knew each other.
He wanted someone to talk to and he thought about her. So he went to find her and he knew to find her in the stables. Then he immediately proved to her that he was someone "safe" by petting her horse. She misunderstood his invitation that evening but he didn't make her feel bad about it. We know she talked to him about the Felice Horse Selling Thing™️ because when she comes to say that Felice was officially selling the horse, he just said "I thought you already knew that" because she had already told him.
Sara talked to August. The same why August talked to Sara. He opened up about the drugs and why he used them. He opened up about being Wilhelm's back up. He opened up about his guilt and about feeling like a horrible person.
She talked to him about her horse and about Felice. Two things that she considers the most important in her life. She also opens up to him about wanting to fit in. Wanting to "be like him" meaning that she wanted to be like the Hillerska crowd.
They talked to each other.
So like, yes, they did horrible things. They are bad people. But they aren’t incapable of caring. And they aren't entirely self centered. That's what makes their individual betrayals even more heartbreaking. Because we know they're capable of caring and they made the choices they did anyway.
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planetpedri · 1 day ago
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you can write one with cubarsi where the reader is a famous singer and when she releases a song it's obvious that they're together and he's all shy
To be seen — Pau Cubarsí.
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Pairing: Pau Cubarsí x Fem!Reader
Summary: In which you release an album so painfully obvious about Pau !
Word count: 590+
Disclaimer/s: Half smau half actually writing! reader is a singer and alll fluff !!
A/N: okay ik u said song (singular) but then i got bored and made graphics so..
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Yourusername
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Liked by paucubarsi, billieeilish, 802,291 others
yourusername My second album ‘To be seen’ is out now on all platforms <3 Thank you to my support system & all of you guys, I love and appreciate you more than you know!!
View all comments . . .
username1 hey! so you were sick for this.
username2 are we going to brush over the fact that these are all love songs and she is literally dating Pau Cubarsí?? (i don’t have a source i just know.)
⤷ username3 RUGHT? i’m going insane. why IS NOBODY TALKING ABOUT THISSS
username4 my pauxy/n agenda has been pushed to the frontlines. nobody can deny them now.
paucubarsi I’m so proud of you mi amor❤️
⤷ yourusername I love you 😭❤️
⤷ username3 hey!! ahahahahahah i’m so normal rn guys im so normal hey hi im sooo normal
⤷ hectorfort Kids down bad😂
⤷ yourusername can you leave lil boy.
⤷ hectorfort I’m older than you?
username5 mi. amor. mi. amor.
billieeilish The most beautiful voice!!😭
⤷ yourusername i cant breath i cant breath i cant
lamineyamal Pau’s blushing like a kid rn congrats ❤️
⤷ paucubarsi Get outtttttttttttt .
username6 hey so “show me how” is actually making me hit my head against a wall. delete it NOW.
⤷ yourusername uhm, you’re welcome..(?)💕
username7 IS THE SECOND PHOTO PAU AND Y/N?
⤷ username8 IT IS?? IT HAS TO BE??
Your front door unlocking had you scrambling off the couch. A giddy pep in your step as you scrambled to meet your boyfriend in the entryway. When you see him, Pau has a faint blush across his cheeks, probably left over from his friends teasing.
“Hello.” You hum as Pau wraps his arms around your waist, planting a soft kiss onto your lips.
“Hello.” He repeats the greeting when he pulls away. “You could’ve told me what your album was about.”
Right.
You wanted it to be a surprise. ‘To be seen’ was your one year anniversary gift to Pau, finding the only way you could explain the depth of your love was through your songwriting.
You shrug, “I told you it was a surprise!” You plant another kiss on his lips, “did you like it?”
“I loved it..” He hesitates before speaking again, “the fans also really liked it. Have you read the comments?” He’s blushing again when he brings it up.
“They are under my post about my album. So, yes, my dear, sweet boyfriend, I have.” Wriggling out of his grasp, you pat his cheek. “My parents are on the way home with takeout to celebrate! You are staying right?”
Pau rolls his eyes, “it’s our anniversary, of course I’m staying.” He trails after you into the living room, plopping down beside you on the couch and pulling you into his side. “I love you.”
Grinning up at him, you say a soft, “I love you,” back. Pau leans down for another kiss but you stop him, pressing your pointer finger to his lips and Pau’s eyebrows furrow in confusion. “First, tell me your favorite song.”
“Lovesong.” He grins, “it’s.. cute.”
“Cute?” You laugh, “I’ll take it.”
“So..?” Letting out a dramatic huff, you nod—mid doing so, his lips connect with yours once again. “Also, when did that picture of us even get taken?”
Sighing at the loss of contact, you rest your head on his shoulder. “A few months ago, when we visited my parent’s lake cabin. My sister took it.”
Pau’s cheeks puff up with the smile that took over his face. “Send it to me?” You nod, reaching for your phone.
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Likes , comments , and reblog’s are all appreciated. lmk if you’d like to be tagged in future pau posts.
ᝰ.ᐟ tags @halfwayhearted @ar4ujos @sakashq @hrts4havertz @joaoflms @spidybaby @unx100to @n0vazsq
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littlefireball · 23 hours ago
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ᴡʏ|[ꜰ]|ʟᴏᴄᴋ ꜱᴄʀᴇᴇɴ ᴘᴀꜱꜱᴡᴏʀᴅ
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ᴡᴏᴏʏᴏᴜɴɢ x 9ᴛʜ ᴍᴇᴍʙᴇʀ ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ
ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢ: ɴᴏɴᴇ (ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ ʜᴀꜱ ᴀ ᴄʀᴜꜱʜ ᴏɴ ᴡᴏᴏʏᴏᴜɴɢ)
ᴡᴏʀᴅ ᴄᴏᴜɴᴛ: 433~
9ᴛʜ ᴍᴇᴍʙᴇʀ ᴀᴜ
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Preliminary summary: You're shooting for "Idol 1N2D." There are nine of you, split into three teams. The team that comes in last has to take a bungee jump. Naturally, your team ends up losing the challenge. Now, you find yourself on the platform, shaking with fear because you're terrified of heights.
"Ahhh…I don't wanna jump." You feel like tearing up as you glance down. It's way up there, and fear is creeping in. Everyone on the ground is watching you; some look concerned, but most are just cracking up. Especially Wooyoung. 
"Hey, Y/N!Just jump!It's not scary!" Wooyoung shouts. 
You can let out a bittersweet smirk and pace back and forth. It's too horrible!!
At this moment, Wooyoung pulls out your phone from his pocket that you give him before you get up to the platform because he wants to call your parents and let them know you're about to go bungee jumping.
"Hey, y/n. I'm going to call your parents." 
"Why??" 
"To show their daughter is timid." 
"Hey!You!!" Actually, you're the brave one among ATEEZ, just like Jongho. The only thing that gets to you is heights. Being up on a tall platform really gets your heart racing.
"Just Kidding." Wooyoung smirks. "What's your password? I can't unlock it." 
Hell no!How can you tell all members your lock screen password is Wooyoung's birthday? It's so embarrassing!
"No way!Don't call my parents!" 
But your shout falls into deaf ears. All of them try to unlock your phone by typing different passwords.
"Is it her birthday?" Yunho asks and Wooyoung types your birthday numbers but it is wrong. 
"Nah. It's not correct." 
"Maybe our debut day?" Wooyoung types "1024" but the 'error' message pops up again. 
"Y/N!Tell us your password." 
"No way!" 
Not wanting to share your password, they're left with no option but to keep guessing until the password prompt shows up.
[His name short form+birthday]
"His name and birthday?!" Seonghwa's eyes go wide, and his member mirrors the shock.
"What the?! Y/n has a crush?!" San exclaims.
"Who is he??" Jongho rakes his fingers through his hair, clearly taken aback.
Meanwhile, Wooyoung stays silent. He stares at the screen, deep in thought, before he begins to type.
[w…y…1…1…2…6…]
And your phone unlocks. 
Everyone except Wooyoung gasps in surprise, but then they can't help but smile as they see him blushing. Wooyoung quickly acts like nothing happened and chimes in, "Hey, y/n. Let's call your parents now."
"What??" You can see your phone is unlocked as Wooyoung shows you, and all of your members smile with a nod. Oh fuck. Now they all know you like Wooyoung. 
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Tag list: @angelsaway , @yeosangcutie0615 , @monsta-x-jagi
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horse-girl-anthy · 1 day ago
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The City and the Self: Or, the Uses of Lesbianism
someone in my server recently asked why Ikuhara seems so hung up on lesbians. I gave a short answer which in hindsight doesn't satisfy me. even this post won't touch on everything, there's plenty more that could be said, but here's a stab at a more complete answer, drawing from RGU specifically, though I think these points generalize to YKA as well.
a long time ago--around 2017, I believe--I posted in the RGU tag, asking about differences between how the western and Japanese fanbases see the show. the answer I got surprised me: I was told a popular fan theory held that Utena and Anthy were the same person. this is confirmed in the interview Ikuhara did with Mari Kotani:
Kotani: How did you think about relationships between two women, like the relationships between Utena and Anthy, Juri Arisugawa and Shiori Takatsuki, and so on? Sometimes it is thought of as one girl and her alter ego. Ikuhara: Yes, that's true of course.
at the time, this didn't make sense to me. now, though I don't take the "alter ego" concept literally, I certainly see where these theorists were coming from.
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the very first impression the audience gets of the show, the opening seconds of the theme song, depict Utena and Anthy as mirror images of one another. I can't find the post now, but I once saw someone do a face swap of Utena and Anthy... and there was almost no difference in the final result aside from their eye color. yes, the show has somewhat same-y character designs (pointy chins, noses, etc.), and yes, Utena and Anthy are differentiated by coloring and height. however, there are differences in the facial features of the other characters, including other female characters like Juri and Nanami, meaning that you wouldn't get the same result from face swapping them that you do from face swapping Utena and Anthy.
visually, the show is trying to tell you something: Utena and Anthy are counterparts; not "the same person," in that there are clear contrasts between them, but perhaps different aspects of a single self. to put it another way, they cannot be separated from one another; what happens to one of them will affect the other, and how they relate to each other tells you a lot about how they relate to themselves.
RGU is not the first story to have this premise. I just watched Ingmar Bergman's Persona, which uses two women to tell the story of one woman, and that came out all the way back in 1966. I think that it's possible to do this kind of story with characters of different genders--however, it's most often done with homosexual/homosocial pairings because two people of the same gender are seen as better mirrors to one another.
when I initially gave my response as to why Ikuhara writes a lot of lesbians, I cited the influence of shoujo manga. however, I didn't detail how homosexuality was featured in those manga.
Ikuhara once said that the core theme of shoujo is "self-revelation." he wanted to capture that in RGU, and it seems to have come across. consider Takemiya Keiko's reading of RGU as "A story about independence, about finding oneself. It feels like a story about a girl defining 'what is myself?'"
this journey of self-discovery must involve encounter with the other. part of romance is other-longing, the desire to meet the unknown; love requires a separate entity which is not merely an extension of the self (this is why I don't believe that Utena and Anthy actually are "the same person"). through encountering the other, one can find one's own self, and further, through this encounter, the selves which meet can be transformed.
while plenty of 20th century shoujo did center heterosexual couples, I believe that homosexual and homosocial relations were so prevalent because they facilitated this romance more effectively. on a visual level, a homosexual pairing can create a clearer parallel, as discussed above. for a more thematic angle, RGU's lead writer Enokido has mused that homosexuality removes the issue of "genetic advantage" from the equation; since there is not a clear "survival and reproduction" benefit to homosexuality, it is easier to see it as "pure love." along the same lines, Ikuhara has said that "as soon as you see the destination point of producing children, sex becomes a social system." that's not to say that homosexual couples exist independently from social systems. the point is that writers who wish to pursue the idea of "self-discovery through the other" may wish to do so in the context where the norms of heterosexuality are not an issue, as they could muddy the water.
as an example, take Kaze to Ki no Uta, an influence on RGU. Gilbert and Serge, the lead couple, are very different people. often in conflict, their love ends tragically. that is precisely the power of the story: Serge, who is left alone after Gilbert's death, will live the rest of his life feeling incomplete, unwhole, because he has lost the "other self" by which he came to be defined. in Ikuhara's words, "It’s a story about that which forms the core of an artist - a starvation that can never be satiated."
when done properly, this kind of romance can be very moving, because it is not only a "love story" but also a story about the self and its relationship to the other. and even more potent are stories which are both about "finding one's other self" and about "the city":
Ikuhara: Out of your works, I particularly like the stories about cities... Stories of cities and “one’s other self” are enchanting aren’t they. There are a lot of shoujo mangaka who write about one’s other self, but there aren’t really any who write about cities. I think a story is weak if it only talks about relatives and neighbours and never about cities. In contrast, I think your stories which are simultaneously about cities really bring out their era. I think that allows you to mark out a line for the story of the other self. Takemiya: Personally, I feel at a basic level that stories without a sense of daily life aren’t very interesting. If one thinks of each person as a single cell, then the city becomes the “body”, and one cannot create a world without both. Based on where they live, some people become more modern or more provincial - the environment really plays a role. For me, it is a necessary component.
I agree with this exchange: the best stories about "one's other self" aren't solely about love between two people, but instead love between two people placed in a particular social context. it is that social context which gives the relationship flavor.
this brings us to the other reason that lesbianism (and homosexuality more broadly) is used in Ikuhara's works. not only does it allow him to tell stories about "one's other self," but also to tell stories about social systems. homosexuality is "deviant" within the social system that is set up to produce children in the nuclear family; thus, homosexual couples will face resistence and prejudice. as Ikuhara discussed in this interview, he is not necessarily trying to capture "the lesbian experience" in his works, but rather using lesbianism as an allegory for the sense of being a minority; a person outcast for standing out from the crowd. homosexuality thus allows for a marriage between the themes of "the self" and "the city" which are central to the telling of a great romance.
bringing it full circle, let's take a look at how this plays out in Utena and Anthy's dynamic, specifically the climax of the first arc. in the build up to it, Utena has been insisting that Anthy behave like a "normal girl," and believes she's succeeding in this venture. however, her illusions are crushed when Touga defeats her in the duel called Conviction. Anthy, now his bride, tells Utena that she likes being the Rose Bride and doesn't mind being alone.
Utena's reaction to this is interesting. suddenly, she is obsessed with being a "normal girl" herself, deftly signaling that all along, she was projecting her own conceptions onto Anthy. though she comes to realize this, Utena ultimately decides to duel again; in the episode 11 preview, she says, "Himemiya, wait! I have to try to get the real you and the real me back!" their selves are linked, tied; Utena cannot be herself without Anthy. what's more, the "false self" that Utena presents is linked to Anthy's "false self"--for, despite her words, it is quite difficult to believe that she "enjoys" being the Rose Bride, any more than Utena "enjoys" wearing girl's clothes. after Utena wins the duel called Self, she and Anthy meet again, paralleling the end of the first episode, but when Anthy tries to impart the rules of the rose crest, Utena tells her, "never mind all that, let's just go home." the two share a moment of authenticity, their "false selves" blown away like petals in the wind. they've drawn closer to each other and to who they truly are, while simultaneously gaining a level of independence from the system which seeks to define them by their gender. the rest of the show will play out in the same manner.
----
side note: I don't think that Ikuhara is more fixated on lesbianism than he is on male homosexuality; however, I'm not sure if he's focused on "mirroring" between homosexual males the same way he has between females, despite the fact that his cited inspiration for the way he wrote relationships between girls in RGU is yaoi.
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indecisiveavocado · 3 days ago
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using this to show goyim the kind of stuff jews face
brief note: for quotes, some were replying to other users. Because I do not want them to be harassed, I have removed their name when it appears, and if that bothers you, you are welcome to make a world where I don't need to worry about that. I have also generally not mentioned the name of the antisemites, although in some cases I have, generally if the rhetoric was ridiculously antisemitic and/or I considered it worth flagging so Jews would know they should probably block that user.
further brief note: trigger warnings obviously apply here.
even briefer note: this is a long post
These are actual quotes, by the way.
ACTUAL GODDAMN QUOTES
For reference, here is my post in its entirety:
why are jews skeptical of antizionism? a guide for gentiles I'd be ok with the notion Israel wasn't needed if y'all could be trusted not to fuck it up when Jews needed somewhere to flee. But last time (to put it politely) you fucked it up real bad, and six million Jews died. Fundamentally, antizionism is asking Jews to put our lives in the hands of the same people who saw us screaming for help, who knew that death awaited us, and did all of nothing. Nada. Nil. (As demonstrated by the recent Amsterdam pogrom, Israel is totally ok and often proactive in flying Jews out. Around the same time as Palestinians were being exiled, Jews from all over the Arab world were being driven out in similar numbers. The reason you don't hear about that refugee crisis? Israel accepted them, without complaint or delay or objection, just urgency.) Pardon us for being a bit skeptical of your assertions that it won't happen again when a constant theme throughout our history has been it happening again. This is a slightly modified form of an older, longer, post's tags/tldr.
and the tags:
jumblr, jewish, jewblr, antisemitism, judaism, israel, jewish tumblr, tw antisemitism, anti zionism, shoah mention, tw shoah, amsterdam, amsterdam pogrom, jewish history.
Nothing horribly unreasonable. I made no comments on Gaza. I said I supported the existence of the state of Israel, which is different from supporting its policies. Regardless of what China does to Uyghurs, Uyghurs can and should not take over all of China. You would not be able to reasonably make an inference on my support, or lack thereof, for Israel's conduct in Gaza.
Here are some of the replies in the chat. Bolding is mine.
Israel only exists because the us gave asylum, ended the war and created israel. To turn around and say they did nothing is a gross mistelling of history but i get it, youre jewish. Rewriting history to glorify yourself and demonize everyone else is the cornerstone of your culture
“Pogrom” 🙄 so fucking disrespectful to the actual casualties of historical pogroms around the world. Your football fans couldn’t handle not being racist for five minutes. That shit may fly in Israel but not in Europe. [from a non Jew, seemingly; by the way, the pogrom, which has been widely called such by Jews and was called "reminiscent of a pogrom" by Deborah Lipstadt, current US Special Envoy to Combat Antisemitism, was premediated, before any of that happened, and as I've said before, even if someone is wearing a Trump 2024 shirt and jabbers about woke threats to the country, that is not an excuse to throw them in an almost-freezing river and not let them out until they say "Harris Walz 2024!"]
Why don't you look at your fucking religion for the foot if your problems and you think that you are now safe in occupied Palestine? We are going to sweep you back like garbage. Hi and get your revenge from those who turned you into soap [note that later they say they're Semitic. Those who turned us into soap were European. They're not the same. Unless they're saying Palestinians were Nazis...?]
I'm actually saying the username here, because Jews should immediately put them on their blocklist: michmanbiker. Also from Michmanbiker after I called them antisemitic:
Anti Jewish!!!! I am Semite [sic] and 99 % of Jews are slav mongrels. So cut the bullshit
[I should note here that:
Regardless of its original meaning, antisemitic now means anti-Jewish. It's like how "slave" was originally a synonym of Slav, but you'd be laughed out of the room if you referred to them as synonyms today.
Most Israelis are not Ashkenazi--from central/Eastern Europe, where Slavs live. Most of them are Sephardim -- from Spain, generally living in the Middle East for centuries before being driven out due to an outbreak of antisemitism following the foundation of the State of Israel
Both Sephardim and Ashkenazim are recognizably Middle Eastern genetically
Considering the historical situation in which Jews lived - frequently killed, dispersed as slaves, et cetera - and Judaism frowning on intermarriage and having few converts, it is reasonable to assume that a fair portion of that ancestry is from rape. It's also worth flagging that traditionally Jewish status is passed on from the mother, because the Romans raped so many Jewish women that the rabbis changed it, and there has been a whole book written about gendered violence [read: sexual violence] in the pogroms, as well as one about sexual violence in the Holocaust. This is effectively blaming Jews for being raped.]
EDIT two days later (November 26, 2024): I got a new one! A user, youngsuitrunaway, posted the following:
How tf did I get this dirty disgusting primitive idea of pro Zionism in my recommended
One user said the following about Israel:
I go into youre property and say i want the half of it
This superficially sounds reasonable. As I replied, it is not:
No. Two people are living in a region. One is lesser in number because they were *forcibly exiled as slaves*. A neutral group draws up a plan for two states. One group accepts it. The other group, aided by every other country around them, rejects it and attempts to destroy the other group. Miraculously, the smaller group not only survives, but takes some land. (It also loses some - Jews were expelled from the Jewish Quarter of Jerusalem following the first war).
From thegreatkhan, who I am again naming because they seem fairly active and at first glance reasonably innocuous in name and description:
How about you stop playing victim and just admit that the world is fucking tired of Israel atrocities?
I replied,
you realize that it's not inherent to a state of Israel? Zionism does not imply being a supporter of every action of Israel. It means being a supporter of the fact that Israel gets to exist. It's like confusing "Americanism" (to coin a phrase), which properly refers to "yes, the United States of America gets to exist" with "from 2017-early 2021 you supported every single action taken by the US government!!!". Or, for you (since you're Spanish), confusing thinking that Spain as a country should exist with supporting the Spanish Inquisition.
Instead of engaging with this, he repeated the precise same thing.
And
Isrelies are not a fucking marginalized community. If they were a marginalized community they would not be getting billions in help from the United States. [note that he's conflating Israel with Jews]
Considering your [not mine; this was in a reply to another user] post about the dropout apology, I don't care much about whatever you have to say. Israel is committing genocide, and supporting the existence of Israel in any way shape or form is the same as supporting said genocide. [So if I think Myanmar should not have been colonized by the British, I'm supporting the Rohingya genocide?] If people believe that the land of Israel belongs to them for some kind of special gift or god [that's not why I said it should exist - I am agnostic] then that's their problem. Nobody is special, and there's no excuse to go around stealing houses and land then claiming you are the victim. I desire the worst for anyone that supports Israel, whatever their background. [I have yet to see any examples of thegreatkhan harassing Evangelical Christian users, who are generally also pro-Israel. If that's false, I welcome corrections. But when you only harass Jews, instead of the much, much, larger Evangelical Christian segment of Zionism, it comes off as sketchy]
Michmanbiker drops in:
Jews are not a race they are a religion [we're both, it's called an ethnoreligion, it's fascinating!], a filthy one at that, 99% of Jews don't have one drop of Semite blood in their veins. The whole premise for that abhorrent thing you call Israel is based on a lie. Everything Jewish is a lie including Jews being Jews as you are all sons and daughters of Shikshas. Your common traits are cowardly, evil meek and weak. I guess that makes you a people.
Switching back to thegreatkhan's better concealed antisemitism (michmanbiker is actually fairly weird, their rhetoric is closer to rightwing antisemitism, but they are clearly left-wing. Evidence in support of the horseshoe theory):
How about you isrelies stop committing genocide? It's a pet peeve of mine, sorry.
This is my response:
I...I'm not Israeli. I've never even been to Israel. The only way for you to infer that I'm Israeli from this post is to have a) not looked at my profile, where I say I am a Pittsburgher, and you may not realize this but PITTSBURGH IS NOT IN ISRAEL, which is in itself ok, and b) assumed that everyone Jewish [or Zionist, I forgot to mention that] is Israeli. I have no more ability to influence Bibi than you do. I am not a citizen of Israel and, despite y'all, I am not planning on becoming one soon. I have never been to Palestine. I don't see how I could possibly be committing genocide. Oh, that's right! You equate all Jews with Israelis! Gee, that's not antisemitic. Hey, while we're doing this - how the hell do you justify supporting the Spanish Inquisition, which you clearly do, since you're Spanish [it's in his profile]? How about Spanish colonization? What do you think of Columbus's genocidal actions? Very hypocritical of you to support genocide (what do you think Columbus did, what are you, brainwashed) when it's the Spanish doing it, but hate it when it's the Jews. Spain shouldn't exist, it should all be given to the Basques. All Spanish people (except for the Basques of course) are devils (hey, you called Israelis that [no, I'm not joking, I wish I was joking], it's not like genocide is any less bad when it's in the past)! Oh and by the way I'm not anti-Spanish cause ACKSHULLY Spanish can also refer to Basques and I'm pro-Basque."
thegreatkhan completely missed the point and replied
I actually left Spain years ago [so you were there, which means my extremeness was slightly more justified than yours], and never looked back, and I'm working hard, (through legal means, and not just arriving at a new place and throwing someone out of their house like isrelies do [Tel Aviv was founded legally, most of them were founded legally, after purchasing land, and this was after we had been thrown out of our house - right of return, anyone?]) to bring my dad over. I'm a Spanish republican, and andalucian. I do believe that Basque country should be independent [christ, it was an example!], same as many of other Spanish counties that have been for centuries treated like shit by the central fascist government of franco. Unlike isrelies, i actually work hard to put my money where my mouth is, but I can't expect a tribe of child killers and rapists to comprehend that.
(The child killer argument, by the way, was frequently used to justify violence against Jews in the MIddle Ages. Worth flagging.)
All of this on a post that mentioned supporting the existence of a country. For no other country are supporting the country's existence and actions conflated. If someone says that they don't think Russia should be invaded and taken over by Finland, we don't accuse them of supporting Putin and genocide in Ukraine. If someone says that they don't think Eritrea should be invaded by Ethiopia, we don't accuse them of supporting what's been called the African North Korea. If someone says Afghanistan shouldn't be taken over by Pakistan, we don't accuse them of supporting the Taliban. If someone says why they don't support the British taking over Myanmar (again), we don't accuse them of supporting the Rohingya genocide. If someone says they don't think France should recolonize Mauritania, we don't accuse them of supporting slavery (Mauritania being the last country to outlaw slavery, in the 1980s, and, according to some estimates, a fifth of their population is enslaved). If they don't think the UK should conquer Iran, we don't accuse them of supporting sharia law and despising women. If they say Turkey shouldn't take over Saudi Arabia, we don't accuse them of hating women.
In fact, in many of those cases, it doesn't come up. It's accepted: of course Tibetans shouldn't run China, of course Russia has a right to exist, even if it commits atrocities.
All of those countries I listed--Russia, China, Eritrea, Afghanistan, Myanmar, Mauritania, Iran, Saudi Arabia--are committing human rights abuses, sometimes genocide. But you still don't need to explain why China and Myanmar deserve to exist.
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brightlight-dazzlingeyes · 2 days ago
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what am i to you | pablo gavi [part ii]
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🌧️ synopsis: In an attempt to get over Pablo, you go on a date, only to end up in the hospital with a sprained ankle. When Pablo shows up uninvited, trying to take care of you, the moment turns into a full-blown fight. tags: angst, unrequited love, emotional tension. (written in 2nd person but no mention of yn) (around 2.5k words)
you can read the first part here.
After the confession, you both said you'd stay in each other's lives, like nothing had changed. You promised. But promises, you realize, are easier said than kept.
The calls become even rarer, and when they do come, they’re awkward, halting. He used to be the first person you’d call when you were bored, the one you’d go to when you needed to vent or laugh, and now? Now you just… don’t.
That’s when you meet him – this other guy. He’s nice, funny enough, interested. And he’s not Pablo. You don’t have butterflies, but there’s a kind of safety in that, a relief in the way he looks at you with no expectations, no memories weighing you down. So when he asks you out, you say yes, not because you’re excited, but because you’re desperate to move forward, to stop feeling like you’re stuck in that moment when Pablo said, “I’m sorry. I can’t give you what you want.”
The night of the date, you’re almost ready when your phone rings. It’s Pablo, and your heart jumps, he hasn’t called in weeks, and it’s like he knew, like he somehow sensed that you were trying to step away from him for good.
You answer, trying to sound normal. “Hey.”
“Hey,” he says, his voice distant, like he’s not sure if he’s intruding. “It’s been a while.”
“Yeah,” you say, trying to keep it casual. You’re trying to decide between two different shoes for the date, and it feels wrong. “I guess we’ve both been… busy.”
It’s a lie, and you both know it. But you’re not about to get into that now. You catch a glimpse of yourself in the mirror, all dressed up, ready to leave.
“Actually,” you interrupt, “I’m kind of in a hurry. I have… plans.”
There’s a beat of silence, and you can almost picture the look on his face – confused, caught off guard. “Plans?” he asks, and you can hear an edge in his voice now, one he’s trying to hide. “Like… a date?”
“Yeah,” you say, forcing yourself to sound like it’s not a big deal. “I’m going out with someone.”
“With who?”
“Just… someone I met,” you say, trying to brush it off, “We’ve only talked a couple of times.”
There’s silence, and you’re about to check if he’s still on the line when he says, “So that’s what you’re doing now? Just going out with random guys?”
You get defensive. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“I don’t know,” he snaps, his anger leaking into his words. “It’s just… you’re already –” He stumbles over the words, his voice tight. “Is that what you want now?”
“It’s not like that,” you insist, feeling the heat rise in your face. “You’re the one who –” You stop yourself because you promised you wouldn’t do this. You wouldn't blame him. But he doesn’t make it easy.
He lets out a bitter laugh, and it cuts deeper than you’d like to admit. “No, go ahead. Say it.”
You swallow hard, fighting the urge to lash back. “I miss you,” you say.
“It doesn’t look like you do,” he says quietly, and there’s a hurt there you didn’t expect. 
Your chest tightens, and you can feel the tears burning at the back of your eyes. “Pablo, you stopped calling,” you say, your voice breaking. “You left me here alone, what was I supposed to do?”
He doesn’t respond right away, and you wish you could see his face, wish you could understand what’s going through his mind. “I just… I thought we’d be okay,” he says finally, his voice sounding defeated. “That we’d get through this. Together.”
You take a shaky breath. “I thought so too,” you admit. There’s a silence that stretches on, heavy and suffocating.
“Yeah, well,” he mutters, “have fun on your date.” And then he hangs up before you can say another word, leaving you staring at your reflection, feeling like you’ve lost him all over again.
part 2
The date wasn’t going great, you didn’t have much in common with the guy, and things got even worse. One minute you’re walking across the street after dinner, pretending to laugh at some lame joke he made, and the next, your ankle twists under you, the pain shooting up your leg like a lightning bolt. You try to catch yourself, but you land hard, knees buckling beneath you.
The guy freaks out, asking if you're okay, but all you can focus on is the pulsing pain in your ankle. You're pretty sure it's sprained, but you're too embarrassed to admit it right away. He helps you up, practically carrying you to the nearest bench, and that's when you finally let yourself wince in pain.
A trip to the hospital later and you’re sitting in one of those sterile, white rooms, cradling your swollen ankle in your lap. Nothing too serious, just a sprain, but it’s enough to make you feel like an idiot. The guy’s hovering by the door, looking uncomfortable, like he wants to leave but doesn't know how. You can’t blame him. The awkwardness between you is palpable, and this was supposed to be a fun night.
You’re ready to get out of there, but you don't want to be alone for the discharge process. The guy’s already looking at his phone like he’s counting the minutes. So, you make a decision.
You pull out your phone, thinking of someone nearby, someone who won’t make things more awkward. Aurora. You don’t really want to call her, but she lives in the neighborhood, and you can’t stand the idea of sitting here with the date guy. It's nothing against him – well, maybe it is, but you really just need a friend right now.
You hit call, and it rings a few times before she picks up, her voice bright and concerned.
“Hey, what’s up? You good?”
“I’m at the hospital,” you say quickly, the words sounding so much worse than they feel. “I sprained my ankle on the date, can you come? Please?”
Aurora doesn’t even hesitate. “Of course, I’m on my way.” You end the call, grateful she’s coming, and feeling a lot better knowing someone familiar will be here soon.
A few minutes later, the door swings open. You expect it to be Aurora, but when you look up, you freeze.
Pablo stands there, his eyes wide with concern, his posture stiff. And right next to him, Aurora is visibly cringing, her face flushed red. She’s holding her hands up in an apologetic gesture. “I didn’t mean to –” she starts, but Pablo cuts her off.
“Are you okay?” His voice is frantic, as if you’re on the brink of death instead of sitting there with a sprained ankle.
You blink, taken aback by how he’s acting.
“I’m fine,” you say, a little too forcefully, but the last thing you need right now is to be treated like a patient. “Just a sprain. Nothing serious.”
Pablo doesn’t look convinced. He steps into the room, eyes scanning your ankle. He’s clearly overreacting, but it’s hard to argue with him when he’s looking at you like that.
Aurora stands off to the side, a sheepish look on her face. “I’m sorry, I called him,” she whispers. “I thought you’d want him to know.”
“Really?” you ask, a little irritated now, because it’s clear Pablo doesn’t know how to handle this. You’re still pissed at him for the phone call earlier, but now? Now it feels like he’s intruding, even though you’re happy to see him, just not like this.
Pablo, still standing too close, suddenly shifts his weight, looking uncomfortable. “I don’t know, I just… I thought I should be here,” he says, his voice a little quieter, like he’s realizing how ridiculous he’s being.
“I’m fine,” you repeat, trying to lighten the mood. “Seriously. I’m just waiting to be discharged.”
Before you can say anything else, the date guy clears his throat. You turn to see him stepping forward.
"Um, should I leave?" His voice is a little too high-pitched, trying to be polite but also clearly uncomfortable now that Pablo’s here. Pablo, who’s still looking at you like he’s trying to figure out if you’re dying, shifts his eyes to the guy standing by the door.
“Who even are you?” Pablo’s tone is confused, but there's also a sharpness to it now, something territorial. It doesn’t make sense, but you can feel the weirdness between them.
You open your mouth, about to explain, but Pablo cuts you off.
“Is that the guy you just had a date with?” His eyes rake over him. "Yeah, you can leave now. I got it." He waves him off, voice firm and final, like he’s the one in charge here.
“Pablo, what the hell?” you snap. Your blood’s boiling, you look over at the date guy, who’s still standing there like he’s waiting for a command. “Yeah, you can go now,” you say, softer, sweeter than Pablo, but the sentiment’s the same. “Thanks for bringing me here.”
Pablo scoffs, and it’s the kind of sound that tells you he’s annoyed, but it’s also kind of funny, considering he’s the one who’s ruining the moment. You’re not sure if he’s jealous or if he’s just being an idiot, but it pisses you off all the same.
Once the date guy leaves, the silence between you and Pablo is loud. You cross your arms, staring at him like you’re daring him to keep pushing.
“Well, now you can leave!” you say, voice cool, as you face him. 
Pablo doesn't budge, though. "And how are you going home?" He sounds offended, like you’ve done something wrong by even suggesting that he should leave.
You roll your eyes. “Aurora can take me,” you mutter, already tired of the back-and-forth.
Pablo’s face twitches like he’s winning the argument. “I drove Aurora here,” he says, smug. Like the fact that he’s the one with the car makes him the one in control now.
Your eyes narrow, but deep down, you know you’ve got no choice. “Fine,” you grumble, defeated.
part 3
Pablo’s arms are strong, but his touch is gentle as he picks you up, carrying you bridal style like it’s the most natural thing in the world. His hands are steady as he lifts you, his face close to yours, it makes you feel like you're back in that place where everything between you two was simple. But that’s not the reality anymore, is it?
He doesn’t say a word as he carries you to the couch, setting you down so gently it’s almost too much. You want to tell him to back off, to let you handle it, but you catch something in his eyes that stops you – he’s looking at you like you’re the most important thing in the world, and you can’t deal with that, not right now.
“It’s just a sprain,” you say, but your voice cracks halfway through, and you hate yourself for it. You hate how kind he’s being, how his touch makes everything hurt even more.
Pablo shakes his head. “I miss you too,” he says, his voice low, almost broken. It’s a call back to the phone call, to what you said earlier, and it’s like he’s holding onto those words for dear life.
Your heart feels like it’s about to shatter. “Then let me go,” you whisper, tears streaming down your face. “We can’t be friends if I’m in love with you, you idiot.”
He’s closer now, wiping the tears from your cheek, his hand lingering longer than it should. He’s too close, and you’re drowning in it. But you let him stay because, in some twisted way, it’s all you have left of him.
“Don’t go on dates with idiots,” he says, his voice is exasperated. “You don’t need them. You just need to be with me, and we can make it work. We can go back to how it was. I promise.”
You shake your head, trying to stop the tears that just won’t quit. “Just because you don’t want me doesn’t mean no one else will,” you say, the words bitter on your tongue. “Don’t act like I can’t find someone who can make me happy.”
Pablo’s face hardens, his eyes narrowing. “You’re just doing this to get back at me, and you know it.”
You almost laugh, shaking your head. “I’m not trying to get back at you, I’m trying to move on. I can’t keep pretending we’re okay.”
“You don’t need someone else,” he says through gritted teeth, his hand clenched into a fist. “You never needed anyone else. You’ve always had me.”
“Not anymore,” you snap, your anger flaring. “I don’t have you anymore! You’ve shut me out like nothing happened!”
His eyes flash, he steps closer, his hand reaching out for you, but you flinch back, afraid of how close he is, afraid of what it means. “I never wanted to hurt you,” he says, his voice so small. “I just... I didn’t know what to do.”
“You didn’t have to do anything,” you say, your whole body trembling. “You just had to stay.”
His face falls, and for a second, you almost reach out to him. But you stop yourself. “I want my best friend back,” he says, his voice cracking.
“You don’t get that,” you shout, the words rushing out. “You can’t pretend I’m the same person I was before any of this happened. I’m not!”
“I don’t care!” His voice rises, raw and desperate. “I don’t care if it’s different, I just want you in my life. I don’t know what to do without you.”
You pull away. “You can’t keep saying that.”
He looks at you, devastated. He’s leaning closer now, his hand on your knee, his thumb rubbing circles against your skin. It’s like he’s pretending nothing’s changed, pretending this is how things always were.
“Pablo –"
You push against his chest, the tears running down your face now, uncontrollable. “Please, just leave,” you say, your voice shaking, but you mean it.
You’ve had enough. You’re done.
But Pablo just looks at you, he doesn’t move, doesn’t leave, and for a moment, you’re sure he’s not going to listen.
“Please,” you beg, your voice breaking. "Just go."
Pablo’s hand brushes his own cheek, wiping away a tear he hadn’t realized fell. He speaks like he's trying to convince himself more than you. “I’ll come back,” he says. “To check on your injury, make sure you’re better.”
He looks away quickly. “I’ll take care of you... like you took care of me.” His words hang in the air, painfully.
You watch him go, every step tearing at you. As the door closes, you stare at it for a second, your body tensing as if it’s about to snap in two. And then you can’t take it anymore. You reach for the nearest pillow, throwing it at the door with every ounce of anger you’ve been holding inside.
“Idiot!” you scream, everything hurts – your heart, your head, your stupid, stupid tears.
You sit there, staring at the door, feeling the ache spread through your chest. It hits you like a punch – you haven’t touched him, haven’t held him in over a month. It feels like the end of everything, and it’s crushing you.
You curl up on the couch, hugging yourself, wishing things could go back to how they were before everything went wrong. But they can’t. All you have is the emptiness he left behind, and it’s swallowing you whole.
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qwardivior · 2 days ago
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DEMON BUSTERS!! — About Nezuko
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And so, the long awaited Nezuko post has arrived!!! Sorry for the long wait everyone, I had to work out some lore stuff and this kept getting delayed, so let’s just get right into it! In case you don’t know or need a refresher, in this modern kny au the Demon Slayer Corps has updated and rebranded into the Demon Busters! People have been dying to demon attacks at alarming rates so to make their jobs easier they’ve been running ad campaigns! However this installment is a little different as this is NOT an ad campaign! To protect Nezuko they did not run an ad campaign on her. Instead, this is known as an ‘about’. Several other characters will be getting an about section but let’s start with our favorite girl Nezuko!
— Lore Dump Incoming!!—
In this au, Nezuko got turned on her birthday. It was supposed to be a fun celebration, she would spend the night at her friends’ house and then go home the next morning to help her family prepare for New Years. Of course when the day actually came, there were complications as Tanjirou would not let her go for whatever reason, stating that he had a “bad feeling” about it. But nothing ever happens in their small town! In fact, the biggest event in a long while was their father’s death a couple months prior. Eventually, after some back and forth they just chalked it up to him being paranoid and she was able to go.
It wasn’t just paranoia. Nobody knew that anything was wrong until the next morning. Tanjirou had gone to pick Nezuko up since nobody had heard anything from her, and was met with a gruesome sight. Just like in canon, Nezuko was the only survivor, but she seemed to be a little off… Firstly, she had tried to attack Tanjirou before quickly coming to her senses after a man called Giyuu Tomioka appeared, stating that he was a “Demon Buster” and she was a “demon” and that he had to slay her. And secondly she no longer had a taste for human food and just slept all the time! Luckily, nobody was slayed, and the siblings were instructed to find a man named Sakonji Urokodaki, Tomioka’s teacher. But they couldn’t just leave! Not after everything. So they came to an agreement: because Nezuko was able to quell her hunger and more or less function like a normal human, the two would go home for now, and then Tomioka would come to pick them up at a later date. As it turned out, in order for Nezuko to get her humanity back, she’d have to become a “Demon Buster”. A perfect way to bring in the new year..
In this au Nezuko keeps her humanity and is more of her own person. This makes it easier for her to get around and get info from other demons easier. She also conquers the sun slightly earlier, but we’ll get to that later. She wasn’t able to really show herself to her family that often until she was able to learn how to disguise herself from none other than Yushiro. Her having a sense of self and a personality separate to Tanjirou also allows for them to go their separate ways a bit more. Of course they stick together but it’s not like Nezuko is bound to the box. They have missions that sometimes requires Tanjirou to go completely solo, thus Nezuko is left to her own devices.
Overall, I really want to explore Nezuko’s character more and there’s so much more to her than what can be explained in a single post. I guess you’ll just have to tag along to find out more huh? This will also allow me to expand more on her relationship in regards to Zenitsu. In canon, it seemed a little one-sided since we weren’t able to get Nezuko’s point of view, but in this au I want to show more mutual interest so it doesn’t come off as weird as it did in canon. This also allows her to make her own friends (read: Muichirou, Senjurou, Genya, and more). Nezuko is a very fun character to explore in this au and I can’t wait to show you guys more!
Also did I mention that a lower moon is seeking to kill her? No? Oh, my bad.
———
Hey! Thanks for sticking around. Sorry this one took a while! After this we will most likely be getting Tamayo and Yushiro!! Inosuke and Kanao will have to wait a little bit longer because I still have to figure out things lore/design wise. As for Hashira, the next one will either be Giyuu or Shinobu! That’s all for now and thanks for all the support on this au!! Feel free to ask me about anything lore-related! I’ll see you in the next one!
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unholywriters · 2 days ago
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Demon's Desire - Chapter Three: Lustful Wants
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Summary: After getting your new wings from felix, who seemed to have left you quiet a lot of things in return. You stared to work on your list along with trying to get other things you'd normally get done but you also had another goal in mind, to find hyunjin and talk to him. Wanting to know how you got caught in that crash to begin with and see what his role was, also seeing how he is once the moon is out.
Word Count: 5.6k
Parts: Teaser, 01, 02
Tags: Demon AU, Demon royalty AU, demon chan, demon felix, demon lee know, demon seungmin, demon han, demon changbin, demon hyunjin, demon jeongin, unprotected sex, male reader, top stray kids with some switches, bottom reader, MDNI, talks or hell, torture, sexual things, possessiveness, obsessiveness, poly! stray kids, poly! chan, poly! felix, poly!hyunjin, Poly!changbin, poly!seungmin, Poly!i.n., Plly
Taglist: @felixneverbadd @gnusihcom @a-short-ass-disappointment
PS: please enjoy this teasing hyunjin who enjoys messing with you, but nonetheless, reminding you of what he could really do if he wanted to. But being more soft towards you durning the late hours of the night, I hope you're enjoying the series so far, Please feel free to ask for a spot in the taglist I promise I will add you into it so you can enjoy the many chapter to come, not sure how many but they will happen. Next in the list will either be Gluttony Changbin or a sloth Hannie just to throw in something a little extra please enjoy and tell me who do you think should be next.
With that being said I decidede to take another darker turn towards the end just a little surprise, sorry it took me a while but I hope you enjoy it nonetheless1
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Filling my tub with warm water, bubbles and rose petals like I always do when taking a bath in the morning. Before I did any of that I made myself a drink, nothing too strong as of right now and set it next to the large sunken in tub with soft music playing the background to help me feel more relaxed then not. I grabbed a silk robe from my closet, usually the first one I see and hang it close to the tub with my towel for drying myself along with my bathroom vanity set up, with the wig from yesterday on the mannequin head for me to get ready for that process. I wanted to do that before I did anything else just to see if it was a lost cause or not and I just needed to take time with it and not rush into it. Taking off the rest of my clothes and setting them down to laundry hamper I kept in there near the tub but not close. My actual hair isn't that bad but if I can keep it up while I take a bath I do, and if not I just let it hang free while I do what I need to do and there's nothing wrong with that.
Slowly getting in I let out a relaxed sigh while slowly letting my back rest against the tub, closing my eyes while I let myself relax. This is all I truly wanted when coming home from work after so long. Just relax, eat somethingwhile watching a show and fall asleep hoping I'm not missing anything while getting ready to do more of a lot of things in the morning. All I wanted to do was this, grabbing my favorite bath sponge and soap I began scrubbing while being carerful of some spots, lookiong closely while I saw a small rose on my left side. It made me stop while I remember seeing the same one on felix, though it was intresting since mine was smaller then I think I could see what his was since it was still covered. It was going to be intresting to hide these during shows, makes me wonder what they would do if they saw those roses being covered just so I can keep my money up.
These men have everything in their hands, but I hate just taking it or being given that, I worked my way to get here. Even when I was constantly in pain and wanted to juist disappear and hope for the next life I would have loving people for my family who didn't want to make my life a living hell while I crawl my way to a palce they've been wanting to do for years yet lost. If I was going to get something, I was going to earn it no matter what any of them wanted to tell me or spoil me. I won't accept less or lowballs for it either. Getting out of the tub and letting out the water, I dried myself off with my towel and used my favorite lotion while making sure my face was cleaned since the makeup was ruined. Getting dressed in something casual for me to wear, it dind't matter to me, just as long as I felt comfortable in this moment right now I was ready to know this was going to be a while. Singing what I could just to get through this, having a steamer to get through this is my best friend for all of this. But the hair wasn't getting better, it wasn't the same anymore, I needed something new.
Maybe I can ask felix when I see him later if it's even possible but there's nothing else I could really do about it. Even after trying for hours to make sure I got everything since yet again I refused to just give up without making sure I could do something but not everything can be saved. There is no point on beating myself up over things I have no control over, that just makes everything harder to get through and I'm not here for it. I closed the wig in the bag it came with and looked at the other two felix had given me. One was the same as my last one, just a bit more sparkely then before. The other one was just as long and flowy, something I loved when getting wigs or even letitng my down my actual hair, but it was a dark blue, almost like a midnight blue to give out something…new. It was like something emerging from the dark and capturing you're attention just to pull you back in the darkness and giving you an embrace that there was no getting out of. Maybe I could use this one for now, since I needed something new after a while.
I help the bag and walked out of the bathroom over to my closet, the large walk in closet with a wide range of everything. Looking through I knew I needed something casual now, the things I was wearing had some sliver strands stuck on it and I just wanted to get into something else. Maybe just a hoodie with some sweats, I should also just let my natural hair breathe for a while. Letting it down while changing into a comfortable hoodie before walking to my room, walking to my work desk where I tend to keep my credit card, notepad to make sure I tracked everything and knew how much I spent on one store, if I go to any. Sometimes If I know I could afford to spend enough I should be good to go on a shopping spree, maybe that's what I need after a long day, well the start of a second one I could feel it coming and man was I not ready and just really wanted to get things done and come back home just to relax. Though my bedroom needed more decore, it was looking boring still I'm getting done with it by now.
I mainly enjoyed walking since I didn't want to drive, my roadrage was too real and I knew I would hit someone in a road rage or I'd get chased and walking just seems a little bit more…manageable after this. Grabbing my small bag I walked towards the door, making sure all of my cards were in there along with some cash just in case. Making sure I had my room key I left and locked the door, tapping the card against the keypad twice to make sure it's locked entirely before walking back to the elevator, one thing I forgot to mention that was in here was my earbuds so I can stay focused on shopping and not have to worry about random people calling my name when I don't feel like talking to them and just stay focused on the things I need to do so I can go home earlier and feel more relaxed and not feeling like I was already doing entirely too much for one day. Slipping them on as I pressed teh main floor button, I just played a random song on my playlist and elft it on shufle while waiting to go down the entire way. Walking out and handing over my key before walking out of hte large black steel metal doors to get to the main sidewalk, turning right and just walking down to the main store close to me, wanting to get my food shopping done first instead of just ordering fast food or eating out. I wanted to cook my own food for tonight and call it good.
It wasn't that far, was it always crowded though? Yes, was I used to it by now? Kinda but not entirely either. Grabbing a shopping cart I began walking around, staying on the left side since this closer and knowing me I was going too carry this all home and give it all to a staff member who has access to all the rooms, and would set everything inside my room without a hitch. Should I have bothered Felix back at home? Maybe but I don't know the exact room number he's in since the door closed right as he started to walk pratically since this place also makes sure everyone is safe, especially those who pay for the higher rooms since those cost more to take care of, though they do treat the lower rooms the same since I used to stay there before getting a bigger room like the one I have now. Sure it would take longer sometimes but since they've been able to expand on a lot more things, every floor now has their own keepers to make things a lot more easier. Something I thought was smart to do because it meant no one would try to steal from the higher rooms and get in trouble for it so fair is fair if you ask me.
But overall it was fine, and I was taking my time and felt more relaxed while trying to plan these out. Looking at everything, I felt better knowing I wasn't using that much but overall it was considered a lot. Overall, with everything I had in my cart, I spent just about 58,000 won ($54) in total with everything in bags before walking back to the hotel. My head held up high and kept walking to the front desk, which was a little bit late since of the drag because of the bags, but I was able to hand them over and watch the people walk to the elevator, where I was surprised to see hyunjin leaving in the same outfit he had when he dropped me off here. I titled my head as he flashed me a smile while walking over to me, his smile never wavering as he got closer. “Well look what we have here, what’s happening right here?” He stood close to me, looking down with his hands still in his pocket while I crossed my arms.
“Didn't feel like getting too dressed up on my day off, what are you doing here?” I asked him, watching him hum and walk around me for a while, almost like he was singing a song in his head anf feeling happy about it and just trying to feel himself. “I wanted to come see what Felix was doing since we have a lot to do tonight. I was about to leave and go to go shopping for some clothes, what were you about to do hm? Cook something and not give me a plate?” I felt my own eyes roll at that statement but I also had a smile on my face despite my efforts to try not to. “I usuaslly go window shopping unless I want something clothes wise, despite my outfit right now, why did you want to try and make up for confusing me when I left after we first met?” I poked a little bear, I could see it in his eyes that he was surpised just a little but and I wanted to keep smirking at the thought it but I didn't. I just kept looking at him while he got closer. I could tell he wanted to reach his arm out like he's been doing almost everytime we've met for now but he stopped himself and honestly I wanted to grab him and walk out since I could tell some people were trying to watch and be nosey about the bussiness that was happening right now but I kept my face as straight as I could.
But he surprised me because he got close enough and leaned down in my ear, his hands coming out of his pockets to hold my sides carefully. “You're smartt babyboy and I like it, let’s talk more about that away from nosey ears, doesn't that sound like a smart idea?” I could only feel myself nod while fighting the urge to roll my eyes. He pulled away just a bit and once again wrapped his left arm around my waist, walking out of the lobby to find him with a different car. “BMW? This looks more pricey then the ones I see on the special events we tend to have.” “Because it was custom made a while ago, thought I have her come out for a drive.” He opened the door and let me inside the backside, I didn't want to smile but I could feel myself smiling as I got in and looked at the black and wine red intieror. He knew what he liked and what looked good, I know some who just woudl've gone with the generic red but this was just the right kind of dark red that feel like a luxury to have. I can imagine the features he has for it as well but won't show it to me yet. “And don't worry about the drivers, I'mnot supposed to be telling you this so early but given how smart you are, I'm sure you can tell something about the drivers now can't you?” I looked over to him, watching him get in the car and closing the door while just leaning back in his seat, of course he didn't need a seatbelt. I guess overall I didn’t need one either but I was used to wearing one everytime I got in a cab just to go anywhere. After all It made sure I somewhat survivedand didn't just go flying out of the car like a fly.
“I thought they were just good at their job and acting like they didn't hear anything as much?” He shook his head, leaning it to the left while humming. “Their lifeless, we each have our own ones, a maxium of 15 just to throw peoeple off.” “Did you tell yours to get into a crash?” I raised a brow, almost ready to explode on him for getting me in this situation because I truly just wanted to go home and continue with my life and proabably laugh at my sister for making a scene if she ever did. “No, our leader had that planned out, we just needed to bring one to the car and hoep he or she would be able to make it past the drinking phase. Usually they all burn from the inside out. I wasn't supposed to be there, since I would stand out but Sometimes I don't listen to him, he gets annoyed about it but there's not a lot he can do other then keep me back in the main house for a while till he thinks I've learned my lesson for not listening to him when he says no.” My mind was trying to put the pieces together again, because clearly I'm not supposed to know who this leader is, but by the looks of it he seems more focused on his friends well-being but making sure the rules are being listned to and not ignored to a point of disrespect.
“The one in the middle? He looks terrifying almost when I met him.” Hyunjin has a habit of tilting his head slightly side to side I can see. Just from the way he's looking now, even when the driver is getting closer to the mall, I can see it from afar and by the looks of it, it's gonna be crowded all over again. Maybe I'll see some coworkers and we can either go on with the day or just talk. Sometimes we do butother times we see a lot of paying customers who used to get violent and try to keep ourselves hidden. Some are just weird but over all it's not my problem nor am I going to carry it like it is. “He can be like that in public or when we have someone we like. For your case, it's to show that we may tell you stories of him being funny and whatnot, but he also wants you to know he has a say in a lot of things that even I can't cross him in. And there will be nothing that any of us could do about it. But, if he likes you slightly, he might go easy on you.” The car parked in front of the main mall entrance, we could see some people peaking while they were walking, hyunjin got out and held his hand out. I tilted my head before looking down and seeing that my outfit was changed.
I wasn't wearing my laid back clothes, instead I was wearing something more fitting for the mall but it was still loose and laid back. I had a black undershirt on with a large white buttoned up see-tihrough shirtthe buttons were slightly undone, only 3 tops ones were and I now had black slack pants with a sliver chain on my left pocket with a large hoop on the front pocket. The sneakers were a nice pick, I was compleletely fine with this one as well but it confused me while I got out and held his hand. “How did you change my outfit? I was fully prepared to ignore people for judging my outfit.” His arm and hand went back to their favorite place while we walked to the entrance while we could slightly hear some whispers and still feel some of the stares coming from many angles.
“Because I'm the type of person that would say something to cause a scene and then ruin their life. Besides think of it as helping getting used to your new life. The main people you have to worry about in public, is our leader obviously, lee know and changbin. Those three take no disrespect when it comes to things like this. And that's not for debate.”
“I'm really worth allof that for 8 men who just met me and decided I was the one?”
I watched him nod his head while we walked and looked around some. There was one outfit I knew Iwanted even if it was for formal events and those are something I rarely attend to unless some of the fancy richer people I know decide to invite me. Even when I know they just need something for me, I charge for that kind of serives because I'm not just going to allow it to happen without someone regretting about it very much.I think hyunjin was just letting me be the guide while he walked along with me. “These are very high dresses, had a plan to attend something fancy outside of the bar now did you?” I could only shurg some while looking around. Slowly getting away from his wamring touch and looking at the racks before seeing a dark wine dress. “Depends onif any of you tend on inviting me to anything, Can't be surprised only to rely on someone to give me a backup. I like having my own options when we go out.” I would keep lookiong up to see his reaction to it since he seems like the type to enjoy spoiling someone he consideres to like, I have more questions for him, but with most of thios being in public it would draw attention and that would be the last thing I needed or wanted to deal with really.
“Besides look at this one, how could I say no to that?” I wanted to try and keep this conversation as normal as possible since I knew i'd be able to talk to him more later tonight. Even though it felt like it was so far from now, I knew that would be more of a better time since then we'd have no one else to worry about. I think he was able to catch onto my thinking or the fact that I really wanted to talk about something with him but it just wasn't coming out the way we wanted to. Since it would also make things a problem and it would be something none of us wanted to. But going back to the dress, it was more considered a mermaid style of a dress, a dark wine red color that would go well with any formal meetings or gatherings which I can only imagine that the men attened. There was a hand stitched design The top had that of a flower and stem design, left to your imagination of what kind of flower, I would say a rose since the color of the dress. The fabric felt like satin with a lace back style, something I knew I had the perfect boots for. Something I always enjoyed when getting dressed up was doing things like this, after all if I look good in a dress, why let my gender stop me from doing so? Even if my shoulders would show and I could probably tuck in the spaghetti straps on the dress to make it look like it was strapless, something I also liked when wearing something like it.
“Well now that you mentioned it, that girl you claimed to be related to when I picked you up.” Carefully putting the dress back on the rack, I looked over to him while he seemed to be looking at his own versions of a dress or even a suit to look for, since everything was close together and it all just overall seemed to look better. “There is an event I was invited to, along with felix and some of the others, you’d get to meet our leader for sure. I was going to go alone, but if you want to go with me then we can go together?” I titled my head to the side being curious of it since I wanted to see what else he had to offer. “Well what’s the attire? How classy or fancy do we have to dress up?” I could see the look in his eyes, he seemed to be happy and excited to be able to get something or the two of us and maybe even making something for the others to see and have something incorporated into the outfit of choice. “Let me surprise you, you can get anything else you wanted from here and I'll handle everything else.”
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Hyubjin agreed to have us matching wth some outfits, I let him pickthe outfits from when we lwft and he would come and pikc me up at the time we needed to go, which would be around 7pm, since it was going to be a long drive to somewhere far away from the pearing eyes of those in the city. But that didn't mean there wouldn't be any security. There would be since everyone ahd to verify who they were and who they were going with. Hyunjin promised that he would talk to his leader and get things handled so I could attend with little to no worryandhe would pay for the ticket if he needed to. Which I was sure wa like pocket change for him since he could walk into a store and get things for free but he would still pay the workers mroe then they were getting in most cases since some people would be rude to them after he left. He dropped me off at home, saying he would send the outfit when he was able to get what he knew would be good while I did my makeup.
I didn't go too wild with my makeup, I wanted something simpy but it would still be straight to the point. I decided to stick with black and gold since it just felt right. I didn't want to do the same looks I do for shows, which is just any silver or platinum looks and I wanted to try something different so black and gold it is. The inners of my eyes were a bright gold that would sparkle in any form of light. The outer parts of my eyes faded to a black settled look. To me it was giving a smokey eyed look but I enjoyed it for myself. I added a winged eyeliner just to look more dramatic? In a way but I liked it, my hair was curled, even with it being small {Just in case the reader has short hair} The Sun was started to set when I heard my doorbell ring.
Walking over and opening the door, it was the gift sender from downstairs and held out teh box to me. Smiling to me as I thanked her and walked back inside, setting the box on table and slowly opening it. Gasping in shock as I slowly held it up, It was something I didn't expect from him, this must be a very important event for him to send me something like this. It was a straples dress with a large black flab around my chest area that had a long piece go down the back almost a veil but it was for the back, the front had black jewels with the left side showing the left side of my waist and thigh, but I would have something to cover things no one else was allowed to see. The jewels reminded me of soemthing reaching out like tree roots in the ground. I had just the best pair of heels for these along with a small bag. I got dressed and messed with my hair while making sure everything looked great. Putting on my black heels that had gold on the bottom with a small black bow on hte back and more black jewels on the front. Walking around ym closet I grabbed a small back pruse with a long black string. Inside I would have my favorite cologne, a matching black and gold fan with my favorite birthday cake chapstick with my clear yet sparkly lipgloss.
I almost felt mself wanting to grab my matching black goves just to have something but I felt like I was doing way too much with that so I decided against it, but I did add some black dangling earings with a simple gold necklace with two matching gold bracelets. Looking in the mirror, I looked something new but I was happy with it. I liked the way I looked, how every curse was hugged but it wasn’t too tight or lose. Looking at my phone, because yes he made sure I had his number so I could surprise him instead of him waiting for me downstairs with felix since the two of them were going to ride together. I got the text that he was here and after maksing sure everything was locked, my phone was in my pocket. Double checking that everything was right and off, I left my room and locked it. Walking down the to elevator and walking past everyone on the main lobby, handing the front desk and handing over my key, smiling as I walked to the double doors and soon to the gates. Thanking those who looked at me before someone offered to open the gate and there I saw the two men waiting by the luxury limo.
Hyunjin wore a long sleeved white shirt, the shirt having flower and star shaped cutouts from the fabric itself with one long black glove that had a silver braclet. The black tight leather jeans had a black and gold belt around his waist but had some silver chains hanging from some of the belt loops, with the jeans covering the high boots he was wearing, at least I was guessing he was wearing those. He looked at me with a proud smile but he was also had a shokced look on his face while I walked closer. Looking over to felix, who had more of shocked face but was still happy to see me. He seemed to take more a prince look by his outfit. It was pure white, practically the same color as snow, no wonder we had so many people staring. Yet there was still some gold accents to it, the collar covering his neck had a gold stitched in flower with a gold chain going to his right shoulder. On the right side on the white pocket was a gold, I wantt to call it a button but its not. He did have gold buttons on it though, shinning with the light while the left side was covered with a matching clock. If I didn't know any better I would've assumed he was a prince with how he was dressed for such an event. And I can see why the place were going is going to be concsidered private from the public eye and we have to go out of town for it.
“Now Hyunjin look at this, you pratically incorporated everyones outfits into one dress for this handsome man, we're going to be late for this.” Felix wanted to say more, but people were talking and some were starting to pull out there phones to take vides or pictures. So all got into the black limo and comfortably sat as the limo drove off. “Well, minus the mob that was growing, thank you Felix, I told you I was going to try and blow people away.” “You two looked like you came straight from a fairytale and decided to come look for a bride and decided on a male. You two can’t say much when it comes to me.” I joked, seeing hyunjin act dramatically shocked, and felix starting to laugh. “Guessing by the fancy attire we all are wearing, this has to be something very important or something just to be yourself away from the public eye and trying to make the place free from people?”
I was sitting between the pair and could see them looking at each other. I almost wanted to say I could see a faint hint of green and red between the two of them, but I wasn't going to question yet. “Well, I would've explained that when you went to sleep tonight but giving how I've been with you pratcailly all day, you won't see me tonight, since you have to meet someone new to keep you on your toes. Me and felix have been too friendly with you, something out leader isn't too fond of thnking that we're favoring you and not giving you a fairchance. That being said the place that we're going to tonight is more of a close friend of ours, well a close group. They can tell you more then we can if they choose to, but always keep this in mind. If you see their captain, and trust me they make it well known who that is, but be careful of them. The two leaders are more resevered then the others are.” I titled my head while felix explained all of this to me. It was more of an eye opener and a reminder, I'm not a human anymore and there will be poeple that I run into that could either make my experience duriong this and some that could make me regret ever being here. Something I never thought to consider.
I have been more friendly and close with these two simply because Felix lives closer to me, and hyunjin seems to be more social and local in the places I tend to visit. I have 5 more people to meet, with one of them seemingly being the one who can either make a choice go through or put a stop to it quicker then any of us could blink with a snap of his finger. “You won't like the later part of this event, something we al started to think about later beacuse at the end of it, you'll begin to see more demons and such and what some of us do, speak out about it if you choose to but rememebr this. Me and Felix can only do so much, if we get told no by those stronger then us and there's only one, there is nothing we can do to save you. And you won't like us for a while because of it.”
If I could leave the car I would, because Hyunjin made his eyes glow this mixture of pink and a dark purple while seeminly enjoying the fact that I was confused and slowly putting things together that I don't have much control over what happens. I was so caught up in being treated like nothing was different and not experiencing anything different from what I'm used to that the now reality that the places I could go won't have humans anymore and if I'm not careful something drastic could happen and there is very little some could do. I was staring at Hyunjin but felix seemed to keep his eyes more normal but I could swear I saw the undertone green at the bottom of his eyes. It was something some would have to pay very close attetnion to in order to notice it. But it overall seemed something for them to enjoy, makes sense as to why we're dressed up so fancy for it as well. And why we had to be so far away from people. “What happens at these events?” “Can't tell you that, it would ruin the fun of your reaction. Don't worry, you won't be phycailly hurt, but you will hate us for the next oh..couple days?”
We got to the place, stopping at the entrance where there were other luxury cars stopped in the large circle driveway that had those large water fountains in the middle. “Do try to remember, everything we've done was genuine, love.”
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bokunokamijirou · 14 hours ago
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lowk hear me out:
post war, touya is recovering in the hospital, and rei comes and visits reader in jail to learn more about her son since they were dating 🥺
A Mother's Word
TouyaxF!Reader
ft. Rei Todoroki
You had told the guards no visitors. You knew if anyone were to come see you, it'd just be to laugh in your face.
The war wasn't kind to you, but it was harsher to your boyfriend, Touya. While he was burning alive with his family, you were attempting to subdue heroes far from your love.
It's what All For One insisted upon, so you had to listen.
But you didn't join the League for him. Not even for Touya. The message that Shigaraki was spreading about a world where people who were seen as villains had the same chances as heroes? That was something you wanted, no, needed to believe in. Your family abandoned you when you were younger, and you'd been running along the streets ever since.
You joined the League and found your new family, purpose, and the love of your life.
You just didn't know what it meant, loving Dabi. Because you didn't love him, no, well- maybe you did. But it was Touya, the man he was when it was just you two, alone- that's who you love.
So, imagine your surprise when you discover his own mother had arrived to visit you. You had only heard short stories about Rei, and you weren't entirely sure what to expect when you met her.
The guards approach you, asking if you'd see her. She hid behind them clutching her bag, but the sadness and exhaustion across her face made you feel sympathetic. He had her eyes, after all.
"Okay, just this once," you manage to croak out as you suddenly feel self-concsious. What could she want? Is Touya recovering still? Is Endeavour coming too? He better not, you'd go feral trying to hurt him. Even if Touya didn't want you to, you'd always hate that man for what he did to his family.
"I- I was just visiting Touya in the hospital yesterday" Rei says quietly as she stands in front of the bars caging you in. "He was asking about you."
"Typical Touya, worried more about me than he is about himself. I'm doing fine..." you reply coldly, avoiding eye contact.
"He- he said he wanted me to meet you." Rei placed her hand gently on the metal bars separating you both.
You stop and glance up at her, the way her eyes were pleading for answers made you freeze. "He said that to me too, before, you know-" you respond softly this time.
"Can you... can you tell me about him?" Rei's voice cracks as she asks.
"About him?" You look at her puzzled.
"My son, he was so young when he disappeared that I- what's he like?" Rei questioned, her eyes wide.
"Touya... Touya he's-" You start and choke back the tears that are trying to fall. "He's an idiot. He doesn't think before he jumps into danger because he's not afraid to die... that's how we met actually." You smile fondly as you wipe the small drops of water off your cheeks.
"I was supposed to just do recon for the League, my first solo mission. But it was a trap and the heroes had me cornered. I didn't know what to do- I froze. I was ready to give up. Then Touya just kind of showed up, right in front of me. Didn't even think twice."
Rei hesitantly smiles as she nods, "That sounds a lot like Touya, glad to know he didn't lose that part of him."
"He's protective, that's for sure. Got jealous easily... whenever they'd send me on missions without him he'd find some way to tag along. I think that ever since we met, it was like he felt he had to protect me... like he was afraid to ever lose me" you start to cry and let your head fall into your hands.
"Oh no, I'm so sorry dear. I didn't mean to make you cry," Rei frowns.
"I love him so much... you created a beautiful son- I just miss him so much" you manage to sob out.
Rei nods, wiping her own tears, “what else do you love about him?”
“He was honest with me… he told me about you all too, before we even started dating…”
Rei freezes, but continues listening.
“He’s a great listener. Lets me talk about anything. And god, when you get him started, he never shuts up…” You smile to yourself. “What I’d do to hear his stupid voice again…”
"He's going to be okay... he's recovering..." She smiles reassuringly but with a pang of sadness.
"Can you tell him something for me the next time you see him?" You ask her hopefully. Rei nods in response.
"No goodbyes, I'll see you soon, idiot." you smile and finally lift your head to meet Rei's eyes once more. She smiles and nods.
You didn’t think this was how you’d meet your future mother-in-law, but your relationship with Touya had never been predictable anyways.
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vigilskeep · 17 hours ago
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You mentioned Sol & Minerva interacting in the tags of a post and now I’m curious what you think the dynamic would be like between Sol and your other protagonists
sol’s family fled ferelden when they were a kid because of the blight, so they have an extremely weird relationship with the concept of the Hero Of Ferelden and would be a little nervous to meet her in a deeply uncharacteristic way. meanwhile, minerva would recruit sol to the wardens faster than you can blink. oh a world-class darkspawn slayer who’s, yeah, impulsive, but also fearless, charismatic, and adaptable, and has even thought about joining up because they want out of their current life situation which happens to be a faction minerva has beef with? Hers Now. i actually had them interact in that post in a theoretical situation where sol is pregnant because that’s the only thing i can think of that would slow her down. legendary minerva viago custody battle let’s go
varric picked sol out partly because they are (in his eyes) keir if he was funny and likeable. (scrappy sword and board human warrior fereldan blight refugee who cares a lot about a sibling figure.) keir would IMMEDIATELY clock this and sigh internally. even today he has to endure whatever the fuck varric’s issue was and now he has to grieve about it too. sol when dealing with keir would probably poke the bear a lot so to speak because they’re very good at noticing when someone is actually all bark no bite and they would think he’s funny when he gets snappy. they don’t respect him and only think of him as varric’s old friend rather than a Great Hero of Thedas or whatever. i think he would find their particular mixture of high energy and pessimistic beliefs irritating. keir loves people who are passionate about things; sol is easily bored, they usually don’t want to hear or give lengthy explanations, their mind skips from one thing to the other. he would probably also be the one to notice the real way in which sol is dangerous: not just that they’re an impulsive live wire, but also the other thing he and they have in common, which is their intensely specific priorities. they would both let the world burn if like 5-10 specific people didn’t need it to live on. and he would, rightly or not, consider their set of 5-10 people—well, mostly the central antivan crows—to lead in more questionable directions than his set
toramar cadash would think of sol as a kid who’s been through a lot. he sees them and is immediately not happy with varric’s choice; this weight should have landed on the sturdier, more experienced shoulders of someone who could actually handle it and, ideally, not come out broken the other side. and someone who isn’t visibly the absolute worst shot at getting solas to hear them out! but he can’t change things now so all he can do is show confidence. sol is sharp enough to pick up on that but shrugs it off. one major thing which is continually hysterical to me: sol is andrastian, and used to listen to varric. resulting in the fact that there is a non-zero possibility to them that toram is legitimately andraste’s herald. because they are also an objectively funny person whose mind somehow moves on quickly from this kind of world-shaking concept—got things to do and places to be!—this doesn’t massively affect how they talk to him. but it is present and they do give his opinions more respect than they would most people’s. interpersonally toram quite likes sol. they’re fun and a breath of fresh air; most of the people he talks to these days are just so squeamish about lines of work like the ones they come from. they remind him of sera a little bit and sera was a massive favourite of his. this makes him go back around again to feeling worse about their involvement lmao
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suddencolds · 1 day ago
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a personal milestone 🥳 + author's note
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i finally made it 😭 (there is probably another 10k sitting in my drafts, but i have always tracked word count for this project as a sum of already-published installments)
also a (somewhat long) journal entry below:
This has been the main project in my life for almost two years, now (I started writing on 1.26.2023). It's my first proper attempt at a novel, and it's one of my first times ever posting original work anywhere 😭
It's hard to say how I feel now, perhaps because I feel too much.
Where to go from here? I considered dropping the series entirely before I hit the milestone because I was very tired. In a way, I felt like I had said everything I wanted to say. But I think I also love this series a lot more than I can properly verbalize.
To be completely honest, writing this series was so lonely. To work for so long on something that I could not show to nearly anyone irl (not family, not close friends, not peers, not strangers I met who I talked to about art); to spend hundreds of hours on something that I could only ever post to a small subset of people... all of that was very lonely. I'm sure other creatives have felt this way too.
And at the same time, hearing what people on snzblr thought became probably the most potent source of happiness in my life (is that pathetic? Maybe so.) I don't think this project was self-sustaining at all; I think to some extent, I wrote it because I wanted to hear people tell me that they liked it. I realize this is a terrible and unsustainable reason to create art, but that's the truth.
On some level, though, I kept writing because I loved Y+V. They've been at the forefront at my life for almost two years now 😭 I spent a long time teaching myself how to write them, and a lot of the themes & choices in the series are quite personal. Embarrassingly, I still want to talk about Y+V all the time.
When I posted to ask if I could send my unfinished/unpolished WIPs, some people reached out to offer to read them... and then I never sent anything over to anyone. I think a part of me could not get it through my head that people would be willing to read something completely unpolished, because... well, frankly, a lot of my drafts are just pretty unreadable; I typically only post things that I have already cleaned up. More importantly, I felt like sending my drafts to people—even people who had given me explicit permission to send them!—was selfish and troublesome.
On some level, I also felt the same about asking others to brainstorm with me: I felt like I was asking them a favor which I did not know how to pay back. Perhaps this is just another way in which I have been cruel/uncharitable to myself, but I never imagined people enjoying receiving my drafts. I could never convince myself that for those people, giving feedback/discussing ideas might not actually be a chore. I was always scared to make writing less of a lonely process because I could only think about how easy it would be for me to ask too much.
This is probably the most honest I've been about this particular subject 😭 I am not good at gauging what constitutes 'too much.' I feel like I can get carried away when someone expresses interest, so I try to preemptively position myself as someone who does not impinge on others... I think that even outside of this series, I have defaulted to this pattern of trying to give and trying not to ask. In that particular sense, I am perhaps to blame for my own loneliness.
Anyways! Recently, I've gone back to (tentatively) writing after months of not writing. I'm not sure if I will post another installment here (maybe if the drafts are 'good enough', I will?), but it's nice to write without worrying so much that what I am writing needs to be publishable/presentable.
If you have ever left tags/comments on my work, and you are reading this, I am grateful beyond words to you for keeping me company + for making me feel like what I was spending so much time on was a little more meaningful :') I always go back to reread them when I'm in need of encouragement. Thank you sincerely for the happiness. ❤️
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msschemmenti · 1 day ago
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girl next door 🏠-7
a/n: at this point— i’m just doing shit 😭
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Summer turned to fall rather quickly and things had settled pretty nicely for the ladies. The women had only been sleeping together for about a month but they’d all fallen into this new dynamic pretty easily. Everyone was learning new things about themselves and each other and it was making for a very interesting friendship.
Like now, Y/n and JJ were sprawled around her living room working quietly. JJ, reading through case consults, and Y/n working through a few papers. Emily had been tagged into a last-minute interrogation at some prison and jj didn’t particularly fancy spending her evening alone, so she’d made her way over to Y/n’s door as soon as she put the car in park. Having spent her day cleaning and sending out project feedback, Y/n welcomed the blonde in with a smile and instructions to get comfortable while she grabbed them snacks until dinner time.
They worked in relative silence for a bit until JJ seemed finally cracked. Her eyes had strayed from the crime scene photos far too many times for her to provide an actual consult. So when she caught sight of Y/n returning to the living room in one of her signature lounge sets, JJ couldn’t stop herself from pulling the young professor into her lap. Y/n fell easily with a laugh, straddling JJ with raised eyebrows.
“I thought we were working?” Y/n asked teasingly.
“I can’t focus when you’re walking around looking this good.” JJ’s mouth instantly started working the column of Y/n’s neck and by now she was starting to pick up on just how to work the younger woman’s body to get the reaction she wanted. JJ was efficient and had Y/n humming softly and stretching her neck to give her more room to work.
“You know, I’m starting to realize how insatiable your libido is.” Y/n chuckled as she felt JJ’s hands crawl up her shirt to rest in one of her favorite places.
“You say that like it’s a bad thing.” JJ snickered. “And you’re not exactly helping it. You’ve been walking around in practically nothing for the last hour and a half. I think I deserve some praise for holding out as long as I did.” JJ chided with a nip to the younger woman’s neck.
Before Y/n could even reply, her phone started ringing on the coffee table. She pulled away from JJ, much to the older woman’s dismay, and reached for her phone to see who was calling. JJ, hardly one to be deterred turned her attention to the parts of the younger woman’s body that were still in her reach. Y/n eyed her phone curiously but answered.
“Tina?” Y/n asked as she held the phone to her ear.
“Hi, is now a bad time?” The woman spoke nervously. Y/n’s eyes met JJ’s mischievous eyes and she pulled her hands from under her shirt to rest on her hips. With a pout, the older woman lowered her hands fractionally to cup her behind instead.
Y/n rolled her eyes, but didn’t move them. “No, now's fine. What’s up?”
“Well, I’m in DC— for a show and I wanted to or was hoping to see you. Only if you want, of course. Last time we talked, you said to reach out if I was ever in town. And I’m here. So I’m reaching out.” Tina rambled nervously.
“Well of course I wanna see you. No need to work yourself up honey,” Y/n spoke softly into the phone. The term of endearment piques JJ’s interest. She knew her neighbor rained pet names when she addressed people, she claimed it was part of her Southern charm. But in the months they’d known each other she’d never heard the name Tina before.
“I’m sorry, I just- you know how I get.” Tina sighed over the phone with a self-deprecating chuckle.
“I do. How long are you here for? I’m teaching during most days but we could definitely do dinner.” Y/n asked flipping her hair out of her face a bit, completely missing the way JJ studied her.
“I’m here until Monday, then we’re heading to Chicago. The show will be Friday through Sunday.”
“Okay, it’s Wednesday now— can you squeeze me in tomorrow night? I’ll stay in town after my classes and then we can meet. And if you’re nice, I’ll come see your show.” Y/n teased softly down the line, easily falling into the banter of their past.
JJ was so close enough to the younger woman, that she could practically hear the woman on the other line laugh and agree. She watched as Y/n smiled giddily and confirmed plans for the following day and a familiar yet confusing fire began to burn in her stomach. Familiar, yes. She’d been known to have a bit of a jealous streak. Confusing, also yes. Because she’d only ever really felt that way with Emily. Never for any other partner. And certainly not for any of the women they’d taken to their bed, casually. As the thought passed her mind, she nodded in realization. Oh, this is definitely new.
When Emily and JJ finally stopped fighting their desires and fell into the whole, neighbors-with-benefits sort of arrangement there was bound to be some confusion considering they had never really brought another woman into their relationship consistently. It had always been a one-night-stand-see-you-never sort of deal. Often occurring after a particularly rough case over drinks in a dimly lit bar on the other side of town. They usually never even brought the women to their house. For safety reasons primarily but also because they knew what kind of message that sent to women and they weren’t interested in that sort of thing. Then Y/n moved in and she was just so attractive and so close. They’d convinced themselves that after one time they’d be able to dispel any of those feelings of attraction. That’s how it had worked any other time they took someone to bed. But they were sorely mistaken. Not only had they progressed to inviting Y/n into their personal bed, it was as if their experiences with her were bleeding into their personal intimacy. No matter how many times they washed their sheets they stilled smelled of her release. Any time they rolled into bed to sleep or do a little more than sleep, their minds wandered to their unbelievably attractive neighbor down the street. The neighbor they had writhing between them for hours, gripping their silken sheets, pleading for sweet release. It worked wonders for their already active sex life but it always left them feigning for another night with her. So they stopped counting. And everyone seemed happier that way. The street’s orgasm count was up and who would complain about that?
At this point they’d slept together maybe, 7 times over the last month. All of which had been initiated by Emily or JJ. It almost always happened like this. After defiling Y/n’s couch for the second time they exchanged numbers— everyone anticipating the routine forming. They’d decide before they left work who’d actually reach out. If it was early enough, the younger woman would offer whatever she had for dinner to them and after they’d all eaten together the older women would lead the younger woman to their bedroom. And once the deed was done, Y/n was heading back to her house leaving both women leftovers of their meal. Very casual, very neighborly, very not jealousy-inducing (so far). So when JJ felt that familiar burning in her gut, she knew something else was going on.
“Listen, let me know what your schedules looking like tomorrow and i’ll find us somewhere for dinner. Are you still off Chinese? Figured. Okay, I’ll see you tomorrow.” Y/n spoke down the phone before ending the call and turning her attention back to the blonde underneath her. “Sorry bout that.”
JJ nodded and eyed the younger woman curiously, hands still settle on her ass, “Friend in town?”
Y/n nodded, tossing her phone to the other end of the couch, “Yeah, I think I may have mentioned my closest friend in location was in New York when we first met. Well, her shows traveling and we’re gonna get together.”
JJ aimed for casually curious, nothing more than a friend asking about another friend, “That’s nice, were you close before you moved here?”
“Oh yeah, we lived together for a year before she moved up to New York last spring for a role,” Y/n answered easily.
“Roommates? Oh, that’s nice that you kept in touch.” JJ said feeling the relief inching into her body at the simple answer.
“Yeah, roommates. We really leaned into that U-haul lesbian stereotype. Although, i think six months is better than some of couples i’ve known.” Y/n counted absentmindedly.
“Oh! She’s your ex? Like the year and a half one?” JJ asked, feeling the jealousy flair intensely.
“Uh huh, gosh I forget how loose lipped I get when I drink.” Y/n smiled, kissing JJ’s lips chastely and rising from her lap. “I’m going to start dinner, are y’all eating with me tonight?”
JJ answered affirmatively and watched as the younger woman started working around her kitchen to prepare for dinner. She’d need to swallow whatever she was feeling—cause it’s casual.
-
“God, DC looks good on you.” Tina smiled fondly from across the dinner table. Y/n had picked a restaurant within walking distance to where Tina was staying and she was definitely taking advantage of that fact as she nursed her fourth drink.
“Oh stop that! I look exactly the same as I did when I dropped you at the airport last May. If we’re talking who looks what— the stage is agreeing with my baby. Don’t think I’ve ever seen you this light and free.”
“That might be the liquor talking.” Tina grinned.
“Uh huh, you always did have a low tolerance. My lil baby.” Y/n teased, reaching across the table to pinch at the older woman’s cheek affectionately. “Tell me, who’re you bedding now? Some young ingenue in the chorus line?”
“Ha! No no. I’m not currently involved with anyone. Haven’t had much time with the show traveling— and you know the new york dating scene is not my speed.”
“Awe come on, the girls not seeing how lovable your little shy, nervous thing is? We both know how well that worked on me.”
“Yeah— I fear they’re not like you.” Tina shrugged, downing the rest of her drink. She waved the waitress down for another and studied her ex closely. “Now you my dear, are definitely getting laid. Tell me about that.”
Y/n blushed under her gaze and rolled her eyes, “Oh you know, nothing serious. My married neighbors have just been screwin’ my brains out for the last month.”
“Oh ho ho— now that’s one way to do it. Glad one of us is getting laid.” Tina cheers, clinking their glasses together. “What does ‘nothing serious’ mean though?”
“It’s casual. They’ve got pretty high pressure jobs and you know how healing an orgasm can be. My dating experience here has been pretty rough and you know what they say— kill two birds with one stone and such.”
“well good for you, babe. Glad to see you’re making DC home.”
It wasn’t long after that the women stumbled out of the restaurant giggling sweetly. “Oh, you’re drunker than Cooter Brown. Come on I’ll walk back to your hotel, make sure you can actually go on this weekend.”
“Oh no, then who will walk you back? I don’t want you out here alone, how can I protect you?” Tina slurred, leaning into Y/n’s arm.
“Sweetness, you couldn’t protect a fly right now. I’ll be fine.”
“No— just stay the night. I’ve got two beds and you’ve had almost as much as me.”
“Alright, alright. Sleepover it is. Start movin’ though— my feet are killing me.”
-
“What is your deal? You’ve been glued to that window or your phone all evening.” Emily asked curiously looking over JJ’s shoulder for a sign of what she was watching.
“Nothing…” JJ shrugged tearing her gaze from her neighbor’s empty driveway.
“Yeah right, nothing my ass. Try that again.” Emily scoffed, lifting JJ’s feet onto her lap.
“It really is nothing, i was just wondering if Y/n was back for the night.”
“She’s not home yet? That’s weird, most nights she’s in bed by 9 at the latest. Didn’t she say she was having dinner with her friend tonight?” Emily mused curiously watching JJ’s features closely. JJ hummed noncommittally turning distractedly as a pair of headlights bathed the dark street. Emily eyebrows lowered together in confusion, “Jen, come on. What do you know— should we be concerned about this friend of hers?”
At the genuine concern in Emily’s voice JJ sighed and slumped against the couch sheepishly. “No, no. I’m being crazy and I have no clue why. Her ex is in town and I hadn’t anticipated her being gone all night.”
“Oh.” Emily replied (teetering between nonchalance and intrigued). “Her ex as in the one she dated for a year and a half? That’s nice of her to visit.”
“Yeah, super nice.”
“You know if i didn’t know any better— I’d say this attitude of yours is because you’re jealous…” Emily prodded, poking at the sole of JJ foot.
“What? No. I was just thinking— we never really talked about the logistics of our arrangement. And safety wise I think it might be a good idea to figure out.”
Emily peeked through the curtain herself, “Right, right. You think she’s sleeping with her?” Emily asked suddenly struggling to maintain her nonchalance.
“Well they sounded pretty chummy when she called. And she’s not home yet. And it’s not like we’re exclusive or anything. She’s a free agent.”
“That she is. Well I’m sure she’s having a good time.” Emily threw over her shoulder flippantly, eyes still trained on the street. “But you’re right, maybe we should think safety logistics. And such.”
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velvetvexations · 1 day ago
Text
If you want to argue about that specific post, that I had the restraint to not engage with on your own blog, I need you to acknowledge
Sure.
how you trolled the #transmisogyny tag, as you often do,
It's a social media website.
did not show me the same restraint!
I wouldn't call not engaging with the post that sparked your OP here to be "restraint." It is, again, a social media website and everything I post except a vent once in a blue moon is meant to be engaged with.
You came onto my post to, best I can guess, imagine the post I was referring to, imagine that I read it wrong, and present the "correct" reading of that imagined post.
And I turned out to be correct. I'll now explain the correct reading of the actual post.
I'm pretty sure that what I said lines up with what the anon said in the post. I am open to the idea that I'm wrong, and I'd welcome anyone who isn't you to talk to me about it and whether or not anon has an incomplete picture of what transmisogyny is.
Anon was arguing against strict definitions of TMA/TME because of how hard these things are to define. In that sentence, they were asking a hypothetical question about a trans woman - does she suffer transmisogyny if she has not yet suffered anything directly relating to her transition? In context, it's pretty clear the answer is "yes." The point they're making is that transmisogyny is more than seeing an AMAB person in a dress and yelling a slur at them. Transmisogyny takes many forms, often invisible, insidious, and affecting people you wouldn't know it to be affecting.
I thought this section of the reply was going to take longer, honestly.
it is an educated guess that you believed my post was in communication with your discussions of male/female socialization
The general discourse but not involving me specifically lol.
last time we did a diskhorse, You did something pretty interesting! Did you know that you did this? because it sends a specific message!
Yeah, I honestly didn't handle that very well. I didn't intend anything I said to ask you to or imply you should divulge your trauma but I did aggressively insist you were talking about something you insisted you were not talking about and interrogating you about if you were really thinking of cis people doing that. I'm very frustrated with critique deflection and though I tried to play it both ways by acknowledging you personally may have gone through an example of an accusation of critique deflection being bullshit, it was very poor of me to treat the situation the way I did. I did not do you right there and I regret it. Trans women often have claims of transmisogyny unfairly dismissed and in this case I was way too aggro about what I assumed the post was about, and my attempts to be diplomatic were disingenuous and insufficient.
They are really showing their whole ass when someone who thinks they are not tme also thinks that transmisogyny only affects transfems after they come out.
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