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hamiltonfc · 2 months ago

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Sports Car — BS

AUTHOR: a surprise for my baby @brennendeerinnerungen

SUMMARY: […] you could do it on your own while you’re looking at me […]

WARNINGS: smut, + 18

“Y/N! Are you watching your friend, Coco Gauff?” One of the several interviewers stops you on the way to the entrance. You decide it is polite to approach and answer some questions, after all your new single is coming out in three days.

“Yes, of course. I had to come and support my girl,” you reply showing them your customized shirt with Coco’s face on it. The interviewer chuckles amused by your passionate support.

“There has been a lot of talk about your friendship with her. As a Spaniard is it hard for you to cheer on her even against other spanish players?” She asks and you giggle.

“I mean, Coco is family but yeah, it depends really. Billie Jean Cup is a different story, she knows I’m her number one fan but when it comes to my country it’s another story,” you explain. Coco’s match at the Australian Open is about to start and you can see her parents waving at you as you answer a few more questions.

“What Spanish players do you support then?” Tricky question.

“Uhm I like Paula, I like that she is coming back stronger after that injury. And of course Carlitos, how can you not like him? He is the man of the moment,” you answer. No matter your nationality, you cannot not love Carlos. He is a great guy on and off court and you got the chance to meet him thanks to Coco and Francis during the US Open.

“May we expect to see more of you at his matches? Perhaps in his box?” Oh. You giggle embarrassed because you got yourself in a bad spot with this.

“Nono, I mean of course it’d be a pleasure to watch him play but nothing is going on, guys,” you reply trying to keep it clean. The interviewer reads the last question to wrap it up since the match is about to start.

“Last question: three words to describe your next single?”

“Mmh… Dynamic, sexy and energetic,” you thank the interviewer and her cameraman before walking towards the court. Before you can even reach your seat you hear your phone buzz in your back pocket.

«you in alcaraz’s box? If he has a death wish…»

It’s Ben. You look up to spot the sender somewhere. Ain’t no way that was live and he was watching it. He must be here somewhere, lurking around. Your phone buzzes again.

«your coco shirt was cute. You were cuter this morning with nothing on though,»

He is such a little shit. You can picture his childish smile as he types this. He think he is so slick with it. You giggle and head towards Coco’s parents that are already seated.

«focus on the match and win it, yeah? Or I might have to go watch Carlitos for real,»

You tease him back. Ben has never been a very jealous person in your relationship, perhaps because you never really gave him reason to suspect your loyalty. But you can see him roll his eyes at your teasing response to which he replies with angry emojis.

You lock your phone and sit behind the Gauff family, channeling all your energies on your best friend’s match. It is a quick win for Coco who finishes winning 6-3, 6-3. You raise to your feet with your fist up every time she wins a game and by the end of the match you are tired as if you had been playing the game. Coco turns to her box before shaking the opponent’s hand and she smiles at you. That’s my girl.

You head to the cooldown room and wait for her to finish cooling down on her bike alongside her family. A few people who walk by stop you to ask for a picture that you gladly take.

“You were amazing! And that forehand? Damn…” you are always very energetic and excited after a win of hers which she always appreciates. Especially you and her dad team up to recreate together some rallies she won and make the whole family laugh.

“Hey congrats, champ,” you can feel everyone’s eyes on you as a third voice approaches you all. You don’t even need to turn around to know who it is. But you do it regardless. Ben is wearing a black hoodie and his headphones are over the hood, pulled over his head. He pats Coco on the shoulder and greets her family before letting his eyes fall on you. He has a match in ten minutes.

“There’re cameras,” you stop him before he can lean in and he sighs, looking around to find a blind spot. He walks towards the end of the hallway and you wait a couple of seconds before following him.

“I’ll be right back,” you say before disappearing after your boyfriend. Ben is leaning against the wall with his arms crossed over his chest, there are only two doors and they are both for workers only. Once he sees you his hands immediately grab your waistband and pull you closer.

“My lucky charm,” he mumbles before kissing you as if he was going off to war for years. You have been dating Ben for a whole year but no one outside your friends and family know about it. At first it started as a precaution, not knowing exactly where all of that was going to lead you two. Plus, being two public figures also means that you don’t really have the freedom of doing whatever you would like. As time progressed and you realized that things were getting serious, you still didn’t feel comfortable outing your relationship to the world.

“How are we feeling? Going to take this one home? Or will I have to put up with your pouty face for a week?” You tease once he pulls away. Ben rolls his eyes at your joke and shakes his head.

“I’m winning this one,” he says confidently. You grin and nod at his statement. He is always hot when he speaks confidently.

“You better. I’ll be watching you,” you threaten him with a finger pointed at his face which he readily bites jokingly.

“I wish you could watch it from my box,” he admits in a whisper. You sigh. You know one day this hide and seek game will have to come to an end because neither of you wants to keep up this farce but for now it makes you feel good to know you can have this little bundle of joy all to yourselves.

“Can’t, gotta go to Alcaraz,” you crack a joke and try to lighten up the mood but he simply snorts and shakes his head.

“Always teasing me… You are asking for it,” he rubs his nose against yours before leaving a couple pecks that are simply not enough and leave you yearning for more.

“Go win, champ. Or I will have to go to Carlitos and—“ Ben delivers a harsh slap to your ass. You look at his shameless smile in bewilderment. There is no way the rest of Gauff family hasn’t heard it and there is also no way they don’t know what that was. Ben chuckles, proud of himself.

“Behave or you’ll get more tonight,” he whispers before kissing you again. You pull his headphones down around his neck to tug at his beautiful curls as he grabs your ass with no shame, as if you weren’t in the middle of the tournament building and anyone could walk in on you two. You both shamelessly make out for longer than necessary, his hands kneading the soft skin of your backside while your fingers pull on his curls.

“We gotta stop. I can’t go out there with a hard on,” Ben chuckles embarrassed as he pulls away. You peck his nose and rest your chin against his chest.

“Fine. I’ll wait for you. Make it quick, gotta finish what you started,” you send him a wink before taking a step back and leaving. As you make your way back to Coco and her family, everyone is already snickering and you can feel it is because of that little stunt you two pulled.

“Everything good?” Coco asks you as she gets off the bike. You playfully roll your eyes at her and nod. You catch a glimpse of walking past you, head low and his headphones in. Your eyes never leave his figure until he is out of sight.

“Your lipstick is a little smudged, honey,” Coco’s mom points out in a whisper that only you can hear. Oh. You smile embarrassed and immediately pull out your phone camera to fix it. That’s embarrassing.

“Oh I remember when I was your age. I was much worse with Coco’s dad,” she tries to lighten up the mood.

“Mom!” Coco groans as she walks to the locker room to take a shower and she can hear your laughter as she closes the door behind herself.

By the time Ben’s match is over, you are patiently awaiting for him by his car. The parking lot for the players and their teams are quite reserved so you draw no attention from curious eyes, seeking for a scandalously good news. Ben emerges from the building with his bags on his shoulders and behind him you can spot his dad and mom, so you get off his car and start walking to them to greet them. But once you get to Ben he stops you with his body.

“My car. Now,” he mumbles with an odd tone. You furrow your brows and look behind him to at least wave at them. Ben’s parents wave back and noticing the situation they head to their own car.

“What was that about?” You ask confused as he unlocks his car. Ben doesn’t give you any answer as he throws his bags in the back and hops in the car. You are completely turned to look at him in the face and attempt to understand what his problem is. He won, right? So why does he act like something is wrong?

Once he is seated he looks at you and his face relaxes.

“Just need to smooch my girl in peace,” he leans in to kiss you and you almost slap him.

“Idiot. I thought something bad had happened,” you say before he connects your lips, his hand cupping your cheek and pulling you closer despite the car not being the most comfortable to be kissing and making out. His kisses are slow and needy. His tongue gently dancing with yours and his hand sliding from your cheek to your neck to softly apply some pressure.

“You don’t know how bad I wanted to fuck you out there. Almost costed me the match,” he grunts in between kisses. Is he for real? He was too horny to play? You inevitably burst into laughter and pull away. Ben looks at you annoyed and puzzled.

“I’m sorry. I just— Jesus, you need to get your hormones in check,” you say giggling and he rolls his eyes at your abrupt reaction.

“I hate you so much,” he says pouting and getting his seatbelt on. You grin amused and lean in to kiss him better but he turns his head so that your lips land on his cheek.

“Oh c’mon. It was a joke!” You try to make him reason but he simply shakes his head and crosses his arms over his chest. He is wearing a different hoodie from before, this time it is a brown one from Loewe. His silver necklaces resting on the soft material. Now that you look at him properly you can notice his curls are still a little damp and his cheeks are a little rosy.

“Can I make it up to you by letting you hear my song before anyone else?” You ask teasing him. Ben’s eyes widen and his grin widens. You usually don’t let him listen to it before the rest of the world because you like the little pout on his face when he is told no. But it is a silly rule and you don’t mind breaking it for once.

“Maybe…” he tries to remain vague but you know he is dying to give it a listen. In his defense you have been teasing him about it for weeks. He even tried to text your producer to ask him to send it to him but you told all your crew to not give in to Ben. You giggle and give him a peck before pulling out your phone.

“Start driving though,” you tell him and he does as requested, starting the car. You go through your files and once you find the song, you connect your phone to his car.

“Are you ready?” You glance up at him. He nods quickly as he merges into traffic. It is a ten minute drive to the hotel so you have plenty of time to give it a proper listen. Without further ado you click on play and focus on his reaction.

Hey, cute jeans

Take mine off me

Oh, golly gee

I can't take no more

I'm goin' weak in my knees

Where'd you put those keys?

We can share one seat

Ben taps his fingers on beat on the steering wheel and you catch the little smirk on his face as he realizes where it is going.

In the alley, in the back

In the center of this room

With the windows rolled down

Boy, don't make me choose

In the alley, in the back

In the center of this room

With the windows rolled down

Boy, don't make me choose

You try to hide your smirk but Ben shakes his head in disbelief. He knows you are talking about him and it does not come as a surprise either since you have been writing about him since you two started dating. But this song seems to be more… explicit than usual.

I think you know what this is

I think you wanna uh

No, you ain't got no Mrs

Oh, but you got a sports car

We can uh-uh in it

While you drive it real far

Yeah, you know what this is

You press your lips together as the chorus plays. Ben cusses under his breath, his smile widening as you grow bolder with the word play. You turn slightly towards him and rest your hand on the back of his neck, playing with his hair. He knows exactly what you are doing yet he doesn’t say anything but simply enjoys your soft touches and your new single.

Pretty blue streetlights

And my hazel eyes

And if it feels right

We could go again like three, four times

So my type

Got butterflies

So good it hurts

Thinkin' 'bout what we did before this verse

The American can’t help but reminisce on all the times you were in the car and all the times he could have had you without even needing to ask because you would have been down for it. The mere thought of fucking you in his beloved sports car has his cock swelling in his jeans.

You move your hand from his neck to his side, caressing his jaw and playing with his necklaces.

On the corner of my bed

Oh, and maybe on the beach

You could do it on your own

While you're lookin' at me

Oh. Ben gulps visibly and you can’t suppress your amused grin as he does so. The curly haired man glances at you briefly, cocking an eyebrow and sighing. He doesn’t say anything but his face says it all. He takes his right hand off the steering wheel to adjust his pants.

Your hand twists one of the silver necklaces around your finger and tug on it. You are being a tease on purpose.

I think you know what this is

I think you wanna uh

No, you ain't got no Mrs

Oh, but you got a sports car

We can uh-uh in it

While you drive it real far

Yeah, you know what this is

I think you know what this is

I think you wanna uh

No, you ain't got no Mrs

Oh, but you got a sports car

We can uh-uh in it

While you drive it real far

Yeah, you know what this is

You don’t take your eyes off him for one second, clearly paying no attention to the road ahead of you so you don’t notice when he gets off the highway. Your hand now sliding down from his neck to his arm and then ending up on his thigh. He predicted this move the second you had laid your hand on him but still he can’t help but grow more impatient.

Oh my guy

You don't wanna waste my time

Let's go ride

Oh my guy

You don't wanna waste my time

Let's go ride

I think you wanna, wanna

But you got a sports car

While you drive it real far

Yeah, you know what this is

The song slowly comes to an end and you wait for him to comment on it. Ben stays quiet for a moment, probably registering all your words and verses. It is when he kills the engine suddenly that you realize you have not arrived at the hotel yet. Matter of fact this looks like a random parking lot in the middle of Melbourne.

“So? What do you think of it?” You ask coyly, retracting your hand from his thigh. Ben rakes a hand through his damp curls and sighs.

“First of all this is the hottest thing I have ever listened to. Second of all: get in the backseat,” he unfastens his seatbelt and you burst into laughter. Ben doesn’t seem to be joking though as he gets off the car to hop back in in the backseat, he sits down in the middle and pats his lap before resting his arms at the back of the headrests.

“Your wish is my command, baby,” he cheekily says. You giggle as you mimic his motions and crawl to the backseats, resting one leg on each side of his thighs.

“Did you really like it?” You ask putting on your wettest doe eyes to make him stroke your ego. Ben caresses your thighs and follows an imaginary trail from your legs to your back and then to your ass, pulling you closer. You can’t help but feel a sudden but familiar presence between your bodies that makes a small smirk creep up on your face.

“Do you feel it? That’s what your little song did to me, baby. I fucking loved it,” he mumbles looking at you straight in the eyes. Your grin widens at the praise and you kiss him. One kiss leads to another and before you realize it you are embarrassingly and shamelessly making out in his car. The windows are tinted but still not a very appropriate behavior for two very public figures. When you are around Ben it is hard to behave or even have control over your own self. Despite having dated for a long time, you still feel like it is the first months sometimes.

“Put it back on,” Ben whispers in between kisses and you frown confused.

“The song. Put it back on,” he clarifies. You pull away and chuckle at his request. Yet you stand up— as much as it is possible in his car— and lean forward to take ahold of your phone and put the song on repeat. As you do so, you can feel his fingers trying to take your skirt off. You giggle and wiggle your ass to tease him and in all response he simply gives it a soft slap.

“Nono, stay put,” Ben stops you when you try to sit back in his lap. You stay bent over the armrests, between the driver and the passenger’s seat with your ass in the air covered only by your underwear.

“What are you—“ you begin to ask confused but stop when you feel him pull down your panties.

“Wait a second,” he murmurs. You stay put but it is hard when you are dying to know what he is up to. The American pulls both seats down so that you are not squished between them anymore.

“Rest your legs here,” he taps both seats and you unsurely agree to follow his instructions. The new position makes you even more tilted forward and you hold onto whatever you find to not fall and hurt yourself. Ben comes to your rescue, wrapping both of his arms around your thighs and keeping you close to him.

“Comfortable?” He asks with a teasing tone. You are not properly uncomfortable but the position is odd and you are scared you may fall over sooner or later.

“Not really. I think— Oh,” you are caught off guarda when Ben leaves a soft kiss to your core. The American chuckles when you suddenly shut up.

“Gotta prep my girl,” he says spreading your folds even more apart. Not being able to see his next move adds another level of tension and sexiness to the situation. Ben starts off slowly: giving your core a couple of kisses, purposely ignoring your clit to increase the tension.

“Ben,” you moan when he finally dives in. His tongue swirling around your clit and sucking on it. You rest your head against the stereo system, your mouth dropped open and your ears ready to pick on every sound that leaves Ben’s mouth. They are nasty. The wet sounds of his spit mixing with your juices.

“Taste so good, baby,” he groans while pulling you impossibly closer, his face completely shoved in your core. In the meantime your song repeats over and over and over again in the background.

“Oh my,” you whine when he sucks on your bundle of nerves harder. Your legs were already struggling but now they are shaking next to his head as he feasts on you.

“Is this what you wanted, baby?” He asks teasing you while you can feel one of his fingers prodding at your entrance.

“Yeah,” you manage to respond without choking on your own words.

“Thought you wanted me to fuck you,” he teases. The little prick is taking advantage of your fucked out state to make fun of you. In all response you push your hips back, his tongue meeting your core again, this time accompanied by his fingers that draw little eighths on your clit.

“Fuck,” you curse.

“C’mon, don’t tell me you’re gonna cum now,” he says and you can almost picture the shit eating grin on his face. Your juices wet Ben’s nose and chin as he gives it a few more licks, just to tease you and not send you over the edge on purpose. He has eaten you out several times but this position excites him more than usual.

“Ben, please,” you beg when he continues to tease you, his teeth sinking in the soft flesh of your inner thighs followed by slaps and kisses. He is just being mean now.

“This is for teasing me about Carlos,” he reminds you of your little jokes that are now costing you more than you had previously estimated. Ben grins when you push your hips back for the umpteenth time and chant his name like a prayer. At some point he decides he has had enough and puts his tongue to work.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” you curse as he laps at your juices. You can feel his finger rubbing your clit and making your sight blurry while your legs tremble. Ben grunts when you start to teeter over your orgasm, he can tell by the way you moan higher and more frequently. His lips alternate from sucking on your bundle of nerves and leaving wet kisses on your core.

“I’m—“ you whimper when he finally pushes you over the edge overstimulating your clit and making you cum hard. You think you are about to collapse by the way he continues to press his face into your pussy, his tongue never stopping its movements until he can feel your juices dropping from his chin.

“Yeah, let go,” he murmurs and you are thankful he wraps his arms around your thighs to hold you back. From that moment onwards your vision is blurry and your mind is somewhere else. Your body moves following Ben who pulls you back in his lap carefully. The American grabs one of the spare towels he has in his car to clean you up.

“Are you good to go?” He asks, nuzzling his nose against yours. You furrow your brows and look at him with the most confused expression you can put on.

“Thought you wanted to—“

“It’s okay, maybe another day,” he says trying to brush it off. He doesn’t think you could take it? You slowly come back to your senses and shake your head. You position yourself on top of him, the only item on your body is your top. So you eagerly tug at his hoodie to motion him to take it off.

“Thought you wanted to fuck me,” you quote him. Ben chuckles and tucks a strand of hair behind your ear, scanning your face to see every trace of uncertainty.

“Are you sure? We don’t have to,” he insists, not wanting to test your limits. You don’t even answer, simply reach your hands out to pull down his shorts. The American gets the memo and helps you out by essentially kicking his shorts off. Ben sits there in his white boxers that leave little to nothing to the imagination. In the meantime your unreleased song continues playing over and over again in the background.

“Are you going to be able to take it?” He teases you as he catches you staring at it. You roll your eyes at his teasing jokes and with firm hands you pull it out. Ben sighs loudly as you touch him, his arms hooked around the headrests as he watches you do all the work. There is something about you taking charge and watching you do as you please.

“Fuck,” he grunts when you spit on it and jerk him off. Not that he needs to fully harden, he is hard as a rock and ready to be inside you but you know he likes it this way. Ben is entranced by the way your hips raise and your hand aligns him with your entrance. You look up at him and lock eyes as you sink down. Both of you sigh in contentment as he bottoms out.

“I fucked you countless times yet you still feel so fucking good,” he groans as you adjust to him, your walls squeezing around him. You let out a breathy chuckle and try to move. There is not much room left for you to move freely. But it will have to work. You rest your hands on Ben’s shoulders as you raise your hips and lower them slowly. It takes no time for the windows to get foggy and for the both of you to get sweaty.

“Shit. Yeah, just like that,” he praises you, your forehead pressed against his as his cock fills you up to the brim. He starts to move in sync, meeting your movements with his slow thrusts.

“Touch me, Ben,” you beg him and he doesn’t need you to repeat yourself twice. One of his hands comes to your clit and starts to run it just the way you like it. Having already come makes your next orgasm build up faster.

“Look at me,” he tells you as you close your eyelids. Despite the struggle, you open your eyes. Ben stares back at you with his lips parted, his hips doing fifty percent of the work in fucking into you.

“That’s what you wanted uh? What you sing about? Me fucking you stupid? What are your little fans going to say about their favorite singer when they find out she begs for me to fuck her in my car? When they find out she takes it so fucking good for me?” He teases you. You are only able to whine in response, your nails digging into his shoulders. He raises your hips and keeps them still as he starts to fuck into you harder and faster. The skin to skin contact makes the hairs on your body stand.

“Tell me, baby. Are you mine?” he demands. Your mouth now next to his ear, he is able to hear every little moan of yours even better now. It only makes his cock swell in your folds as you continue to whimper and whine and moan.

“I’m yours, Ben, fuck,” you struggle to form a coherent thought. The American sinks his teeth into your shoulder as he feels himself teetering over the edge as well, both of his hands having grabbed a fistful of your ass to keep your steady and fuck you harder.

“Look at me when you cum,” he mumbles and you do. Looking down at him with your mouth dropped open as your second orgasm washes over you even harder than the first one. Ben can feel your walls squeezing his cock to death, almost trapping him inside you as you milk him out. He cums just as hard, you can feel his seed spilling down your thighs and it only makes you moan harder.

“ ‘m sorry, I didn’t pull out,” he apologizes out of breath but you shake your head. Your nails now fully leaving scratches on his shoulders but he seems to be paying it no mind as he tries to gently put you down back in his lap. You both collapse afterwards, your sweaty bodies melting into one as you catch your breath.

The only audible thing outside your unsteady breathing is your song streaming. Ben gently rubs the small of your back as neither of you seems to be interested in moving an inch. Matter of fact he stays inside of you for at least another ten minutes. You see the half-moon marks on his shoulders and caress them softly. Hopefully you didn’t hurt him.

“I think your fans will go insane over this one,” he comments and you smile proudly.

“I know I did,” he adds chuckling. You look up at him and grin, leaning in to kiss him. He holds you close to his body as if there was any chance you could ever willingly escape from his embrace.

“Y/N, quite a scandalous song. Can you tell us more about it? Or about him?” The interviewer asks with a knowing smirk. It is a quick interview before your exhibition so you don’t have much time left. You chuckle embarrassed, clearly expecting such a question. The camera is pointed at you, catching every change in your facial expression. You know Ben is somewhere watching this live and giggling.

“I like sports car and I like guys who drive them,” you remain vague but your grin says what your words don’t. Your song released yesterday and you have had the chance to read some of the comments. Everyone is going insane over it and over the mysterious man.

“Guys? Or a guy?” The interviewer insists and you laugh again.

“Maybe,” you don’t give her any information but everyone knows by now that there is definitely someone. You don’t plan on keeping him a secret for much longer but you like the idea of people going insane over this.

“Okay, we got it. Well, Y/N, is there someone you’d like to say hi to before we wrap this one up?” It is a common ending for the show you have been invited to. You nod and look straight into the cameras, your lips threatening to form a smirk.

“See you back at home, Ben,”

#holy shit…#i’m actually going insane #i fear i’ll never be the same again #fic rec

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hamiltonfc · 2 months ago

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Loved this chapter<3 can’t wait for what’s to come🤭

i’m not gonna give anything away but the next chapter is kinda insane 🫣

#thank you anon ❤️#anon #my works: moth to a flame #hamiltonfc.inbox

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hamiltonfc · 2 months ago

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.𖥔 ݁ ˖⋆⭒˚｡⋆ MOTH TO A FLAME; JUDE BELLINGHAM (Chapter Three)

➤ Summary: Kaia heads up to Sunderland to spend Christmas with Jude and his family, giving her some much needed time away from her boyfriend, where she can either continue to spend time thinking about her problems, or accept the much needed distraction.

➤ Pairing: Jude Bellingham x F!OC

➤ Warnings: Swearing, Food mention.

➤ Discussion tag: #my works: moth to a flame (if you ever have any questions about the story, release schedule, etc. my inbox is always open.)

➤ Word Count: 4,699

TAGLIST | SERIES PLAYLIST | SERIES MASTERLIST

Kaia’s POV

I groan the second I’m awoken by my alarm, 05:45 it reads. Rolling onto my back, I try my best to keep my eyes open as I stare blankly at the ceiling. My head aches a little, and I still don’t know why I insist on staying up late on Christmas Eve drinking every year. I push myself out of bed, no matter how much my body hates me for it. A chill immediately passes over my whole body, so I quickly grab the hoodie that’s flung over the back of my desk chair. It once belonged to Jude, I think.

The moment I leave my room I’m met with my little brother, Leo, who throws himself at me, wrapping his arms around my waist, gripping me tightly. “Merry Christmas, Kaia!” He beams up at me, a small gap where his two front teeth should be after they fell out just over a week ago.

“Merry Christmas, Darling. Are you excited to see what Santa’s brought you?” I cup his cheeks in my hands, leaning down to kiss his forehead.

“Yes, yes, yes!” He bounces, grabbing my hand, and dragging me down the hall towards the stairs. Only a seven-year-old would have this much energy before six in the morning. I knock on Olivia’s door when we pass it, yelling at her to get her lazy arse out of bed before I get pulled down the stairs and into the living room.

My parents are already awake, as they always are at this time, making sure the magic of Christmas is kept alive for Leo’s sake.

“Merry Christmas, My Loves,” Mum says as soon as we walk through the door.

“Merry Christmas, Mummy,” Leo yells, running over to her and Dad, giving them both quick hugs before he gets distracted by all his presents. “Santa came! Look, Kaia,” he turns towards me, pointing at a pile of presents next to his. “He brought some for you, too!”

I smile at Leo, watching as he bounces in anticipation of opening his gifts right before approaching my parents. “Merry Christmas, Mum,” I lean down and kiss her on the cheek before moving onto my dad. “Merry Christmas, Dad.”

“Where’s that sister or yours,” Mum asks me as I sit next to Leo in front of my presents. “I’m telling you, the day she’s on time for something will be when we also win the lottery.”

“Who won the lottery?” Olivia says, finally joining us.

“No one, Darling,” Dad says. “Hurry up and open your presents before Leo bursts.”

Olivia sleepily drops herself to the floor next to me, giving me the side eye as she pulls one of her gifts onto her lap. “Yeah, yeah. Merry Christmas, everyone.”

****

“Have you got your gifts for everyone, Kaia?” I hear Mum yell up the stairs as I finally get my foot into my boot after a little struggle.

“Yeah,” I yell back as best I can while trying to balance myself on one foot. I hop to keep my balance as I do up the zip, letting out a deep sigh when I turn to look at myself in the mirror. Adjusting my black skirt, I check my tights a fifth time for ladders.

“Right,” I breathe out, turning to my bed. “I’ve got their presents, spare clothes, toothbrush,” I draw out the ‘sh’ while I think. “No, I’ll get that on my way out.”

I whip my jacket from the back of my desk chair, pulling it over my green jumper before I grab everything from my bed and turn to leave. “Oop,” I hum, turning on my heel as I remember my teddy on my bed. “Can’t forget you, can we, Ted,” I say to it, leaning down awkwardly to grasp him between two of my fingers.

“You can get in the car if you’re ready?” Dad says as soon as I reach the bottom of the stairs.

“Yeah,” I breathe out just as Leo rushes past me, almost tripping me up in the process. “Thanks.”

Shoving my things into the partially full boot, I head round to the left side of the car. I climb in, taking my favourite seat at the very back of the seven-seater that my parents bought purely to stop arguments between me and my siblings.

I’m almost fully settled with my headphones on and my Kindle in hand when my phone buzzes against my leg.

Jude: Merry Christmas, Dickhead.

A smile crosses my lips as I roll my eyes before responding.

Kaia: I hope Santa had you on his Naughty List if you think it’s okay to speak to people like that.

Jude: Santa brought me loads of presents. thank you very much. Jude: He loves me so much that I can get away with the odd swear word. Yk seeing as though I’m a grown-up and all that.

Kaia: Hm. Strange how you don’t act like one, though.

Jude: You love the way I act. Jude: That’s why you’re on your way to see me rn.

Kaia: We’ve not set off yet actually.

Jude: Same difference. Jude: See you in a few hours?

Kaia: I thought we’d already established that.

Jude: Have I ever told you that you’re the worst person I know?

Kaia: No. I usually get rave reviews from you. Kaia: Anyway, we’re about to set off so please don’t disturb me bc this is the only peace and quiet I’m going to be getting all day. See you in a bit.

I shut off my phone just as my dad climbs into the car.

“Everyone in?” He says checking his mirrors. I give him a thumbs up and I catch his smile at me in the rearview mirror. “Off to Sunderland, it is, then.”

****

“Honey, I’m home!” I shout as soon as I enter to door to the Bellinghams’ place, leaving the rest of my family to collect everything from the car.

“Honey?” Jobe says as he stands on the bottom step looking at me with a puzzled expression. “I think you’ve got the wrong brother.”

“Jobe!” I beam at him. It’s been months since I last saw him and I’ve missed him more than anyone could possibly imagine. Knowing him his whole life has made him like another brother to me, I’d literally do anything for him, at this point. “I’d love to give you a hug and a kiss, but could you please help me with all my stuff first, my arms are killing me?”

“Of course, I can, Your Royal Highness,” he grabs the bag hanging from my shoulder. “I’m guessing this one’s to go into Jude’s room, yeah?”

“Mhm. Thanks, Jobe. You’re a star,” I say after him as I watch him start to climb the stairs, following the noise of the voices that have been following me my whole life.

“Merry Christmas,” I say enthusiastically when I enter their living room. There’s only Jude and Mark on the sofa with Denise most likely in the kitchen creating the amazing aroma of a Christmas dinner. The TV’s playing A Muppet’s Christmas Carol, which is serving as background noise while the two men talk. “I come bearing gifts!”

“Dad, call the police. Someone’s intruding,” Jude says flatly, only turning round to glance at me shortly before putting his attention back on his phone.

“Kaia, love,” Marks says, getting up from his seat to take my bags out of my hands to place them by the tree. “Merry Christmas.”

“Thanks, Mark,” I smile at him. “Shame you didn’t teach your son manners, though.”

Jude scoffs as he stands from his seat. “Please, I’m the politest person you know.” He smiles down at me once he’s standing right in front of me before he wraps me up in a warm hug. He pulls me tight against his body squeezing me a few times before he lets go. “Merry Christmas, Dickhead.”

“Merry Christmas to you, too, you silly twat.” I reach up and ruffle his hair for all of half a second before he quickly grabs my wrist, pulling my hand away from his head.

“Oi, I spend a lot of time on my hair so I won’t have you messing it up, thank you very much,” he frowns at me, leaning down to try and fix his hair in the reflection of a picture frame sitting on a nearby cabinet.

“Really?” I question, furrowing my brows at him as I take in the appearance of his hair. “Doesn’t look like it.”

“What do you mean?” He flicks his head around, eyes meeting mine. “I look well fit today.”

“Keep telling yourself that, Hun,” I say patting his shoulder before I walk back into the hallway, remembering that I have yet to take my boots off.

“What the hell are those?” Jude says after following you.

“Apparently a Time Machine back to 2016,” I snark back.

“Haha. Very funny. I meant those on your feet,” he points down at the floor.

I follow when his finger is pointing, and my eyes land on my bright green Grinch socks. “Oh, those. Yeah, these are my Grinch socks. You like them?”

Jude stares down at them for a short while before meeting your eyes. “Yeah,” he nods slowly. “Definitely not hideous or anything.”

“Oh, come off it,” I say, turning away from him and walking towards the kitchen. “They’re not hideous.”

“Kaia!” Denise says as soon as I enter the room. “Merry Christmas, my darling.” She pulls me into a hug, gently kissing me on my cheek. “Where’s your mum?”

“In the living room, I think.” She nods in my direction, looking over the food once again before turning back towards me and Jude, who had also made his way into the kitchen.

“Do you two mind watching the food for a sec while I go and say hello?” Denise looks between the both of us, waiting for us to nod our heads before leaving the room to say hello to my parents and siblings.

“So,” Jude says, dragging out the ‘o’ while he takes a lid off a pan to check the vegetables, throwing his head back dramatically when a gust of steam hits him in the face, eliciting a laugh out of me. “That wasn’t funny. It almost burnt my eyes out.

“Please, your eyes are fine, it’s only a bit of steam,” I smile, watching as he uses the sleeve of his sweater to wipe his eyes. “What were you going to say?”

“What,” Jude says, squinting in my direction.

“You were going to say something just before your eyes nearly died. What were you going to say.”

He hesitates while he recalls what he was going to say. “Oh, yeah,” he nods once. “I was going to ask you how it’s going with the boyfriend.”

Jude pulls somewhat of a funny face when he mentions ‘the boyfriend’, but it’s nothing I can be bothered dealing with, especially not right now.

“No, no. No boyfriend talk today. I don’t want any talk of anything that makes me sad, angry, or just outright pisses me off today. It’s Christmas, I want to be happy today,” I tell him, leaning my body against the kitchen counter.

“Fair enough,” Jude mirrors what I’m doing at the other side of the stove. After a short while of glances between me and all the pans, he speaks once again. “I’m glad you're here.”

“Me too,” I flash him a genuine smile.

“I don’t like that we don’t get as much time together anymore. We used to see each other all the time, and now it feels as though we’re lucky if get to see each other five times a year,” Jude says.

“I know,” I give him a tight-lipped smile. “Shit, innit, growing up. First I lose Santa and then I lose you.”

Jude laughs. “Do you cry as much about losing me as you did when you found out Santa didn’t exist?” He smirks, reminding you once again that there isn’t a thing he doesn’t know about you.

“Of course I don't, that was a really tough time for me. I lost Santa, the Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy all in one day, I was fuming. At least I know you’re somewhere in the world, you’d never make me forget that.”

“But you were sobbing. I remember when I came over later that day for dinner and you were still crying, we all thought a family member had died or something,” Jude says, laughing at the old memory.

“It was the closest I’d been to real loss at that point in my life, I had more than a right to be upset. It hurts knowing that your mum and dad have lied to you your whole life,” I say seriously.

“Do you think you’d cry that much if you lost me?” The joking tone that was in his voice before is gone, instead replaced with something much more serious as he stares into my eyes.

“You know the answer to that,” I say, staring back at him just as hard. “I don’t know how to live a life without you in it, I’ve never had to before.”

“Well, that’s not entirely true,” Jude mentions. “You’re four months older than me, you survived those without me just fine.”

“Only because I can’t remember it. For everything I can remember you’ve been there, that’s all that matters.”

Our words hang in the air for a while as we both continue doing the job we’ve been tasked with. I wonder, though, still even after all this time, why, every single time I’m in his presence, does Jude make me feel like nothing else. He brings out a side to me and makes me think thoughts, that no one in the world could even torture out of me. On the surface, everyone who knows us, including our parents and our closest friends, thinks that we’re just friends, the best of friends no less, but just friends. We’ve managed to keep every tiny detail about us that makes us so incredibly… fucked up, for lack of a better term, under wraps for years.

There’s something about that, though, the deepest, darkest parts of yourself only being shared with one other person, you can end up feeling incredibly lonely.

“Right, you two,” Denise says as soon as she enters the kitchen again. “Go and sit down at the table, dinner will be ready in about ten minutes and I can’t have you both bothering me while I plate it up.”

“Rude,” Jude whispers under his breath so only I can hear it as we head towards the dining room, smiling at me when I take my seat next to him. Right where I always will be.

****

“I don’t think I’m ever going to be able to eat another thing ever again,” I groan, flopping backwards onto Jude’s bed, my hands caressing my tummy.

“Say that when you’re eating dessert later,” Jude scoffs from where he’s standing next to his wardrobe.

“No,” I push up onto my elbows. “I mean it. I’m not going to be able to eat it, I think I’m going to be full for the rest of my life.” I wince in pain as I sit up, the food in my stomach causing an ache. “You know, I really could do with some comfy clothes. The waistband on this skirt is digging into me and making me feel sick.”

I wiggle my eyebrows, to the best of my ability, at Jude while he stands there shaking his head at me. “You could just ask for half my wardrobe if you want it. There’s no use trying to hide what you want from me. Well, as long as you ask nicely.”

“Jude,” I say, giving him a big smile. “May I borrow some of your most comfortable clothes, please?”

“Borrow? I’ll be lucky if I ever see them again,” he tells you, digging through his drawers in hopes of finding some of his old sweats to give you.

“It’s only because I end up loving your clothes more than you do, I’ll be wearing these practically every day until they wear thin,” I tell him, standing up as I undress.

I pull my jumper over my head, throwing it to the other side of the room, aiming for his wash basket but I miss miserably. Jude turns back towards me when I pull down my skirt and tights. He looks startled, like a deer caught in headlights.

“Oh, uhm, sorry,” he stumbles over his words, eyes glancing everywhere but my body, not knowing where to place them until he settles on turning his body to the side slightly, averting his eyes completely.

“What?” I say, continuing to remove my clothes until I’m standing there only in my underwear. “It’s nothing you haven’t seen before.”

“Oh, I know. But you have a boyfriend,” Jude mentions, turning his body back towards yours as if there’s a magnetic force drawing you his way, his eyes settled firmly on the floor in front of him.

“Never stopped you before,” I walk over to him, grabbing the clothes from his hands. “Thanks for these, by the way.”

“You’re welcome,” he gives me a tight-lipped smile, nodding once before his eyes land on my body again, raking over my half-dressed form just long enough to make goosebumps rise on my skin.

I pull on the all-black sweater and sweatpants, pulling the string tightly around my waist, my best efforts to keep them up as they sit loosely around my waist. After leaning down to grab my fluffy Grinch socks from the floor, I jump back up onto his bed, patting the spot beside me. “Come on, I got presents to give you. They’re in that bag over there, can you grab it for me?”

Jude gulps before moving across his room to grab my bag, bringing it over to me before he takes his seat on the left side of the bed.

I rifle through the bag, moving past everyone else’s presents, that I’ll hand out later, to find Jude’s. “Right,” I say, pulling out a small box that’s wrapped in dark blue wrapping paper before pulling out two bigger presents. “Here they are. I want you to open this one first.” I hand him the middle-sized present shifting my body around a little further to have a good view when he opens it.

“Okay,” Jude beams down at the gift, quickly unwrapping the gift only for his face to fall when he realises what I’ve gotten him. “You’ve got to be kidding me?”

“What? I thought you’d really like them,” I say, feigning sadness when I’m trying my hardest not to burst out laughing.

“Remember when I told you your socks were hideous earlier? What about that made you think I’d like some for myself?” He says holding up a pair of bright green Grinch socks, just like the ones you’ve currently got on your feet.

“Yeah, but,” I stick out my leg, showing off my own pair of socks. “We can match.”

“Kai,” Jude says, raising his eyebrows at you. “I love very much, and I appreciate everything that you buy me, but I am not wearing these.”

“Oh, yes you are. I spent good money on those, a whole three pounds in Primark,” I smile while Jude laughs.

“Okay, since you had to take out a bank loan to afford them practically, I’ll wear them, but only during our movie night because if Jobe sees me in these I’ll never hear the end of it,” he says. I whisper a little ‘yes’ before handing him the second present, the biggest of them all.

“This one next!”

I watch intently as he opens his next present, actually caring about his reaction to this one. My smile grows watching him realise what I’ve gotten him. “Is this a projector?”

Jude turns to me with a massive smile on his face, his eyes wide when they trace over the box, taking in all the features.

“Mhm,” I nod. “It syncs up to both your Playstation and the DVD player I got you a few years back. There’s also an app that you can download on it that allows you to watch something with someone else.”

“You have one as well?” He asks.

“Yeah,” I say. “Ordered one originally just for myself, but then thought you’d probably like one, too.”

“I love it,” Jude exclaims. “Thank you. Will it just project onto my wall or do I have to get a screen?”

“It can work on your wall, but when I was researching it, it said that it works better on a screen so I’ve already ordered you one. It should be arriving at your place in Madrid just after you get back.”

Jude nods, turning to place the box down on the floor before turning back towards me. He leans in, pressing a soft kiss on my cheek. “Thank you,” he whispers against my skin, leaving another kiss in his word’s wake before sitting up straight again.

“Final one,” I say enthusiastically, handing him the gift.

“Is this one the most special?” Jude looks up at me, giving me a little smirk. “It’s in a fancy box and everything.”

“Open it and see.”

He does just that, lifting the lid off the box slowly, glancing up at me every so often in anticipation. I watch him intently as he pulls back the tissue paper, slowly revealing his gift. The gold keyring glistens under the light of his bedroom when Jude pulls it out of the box. Hanging off the ring, there’s a small infinity symbol alongside a larger dogtag-shaped charm, inscribed with a very special message.

“Read it,” I say quietly, motioning to the bigger charm.

“‘I’m always with you. Play your heart out. Love your Kai x’”, Jude reads the words written in the metal. “Wait,” he says, bringing the keyring closer to his face so he can get a clearer look at the words. “Isn’t this what that note said? The one you left in my bag the day before I went to my first-ever away game because you couldn’t come with me? And it’s in your handwriting.”

Jude looks at me, eyes a little glassy, watching me as I nod. “Yep,” I tell him. “Thought that since it’s been three years since I was able to cheer you on regularly, I’d give you something that you can take with you everywhere, something that will always make you think of me.”

Jude nods, looking back down at the keyring before he encloses it completely in his large hand. “I love it,” he smiles at me. “Thank you so much. I’m gonna see if there’s a little pocket in my match bag that I can put this in. It means a lot it really does, Kai.”

He leans towards me, engulfing me in his arms. The embrace is one full of warmth as he pulls my body flush against his. “I always feel so bad having to watch you on the TV all the time, never getting the time to come and see you as much as I’d like, so it gives me peace of mind that now you’ll always have something with you to look at if you need a little bit of extra support,” I pull back from the hug, looking into his eyes once again. “I promise, though, I am going to try and come and see you more next year.”

“Are you telling me that’s one of your New Year’s resolutions?” Jude asks, turning to place his gifts on his nightstand before he turns back towards me with a small smirk on his face.

“I suppose,” I shrug one shoulder.

“Well, I look forward to seeing you once, then,” Jude smiles cheekily.

“Hey,” I say, leaning over to lightly hit him. “Not fair.”

“What? I’ve known you for over twenty years and you’ve never kept a New Year’s resolution.”

“My other New Year’s resolution is to keep any and all New Year’s resolutions, actually,” I said snarkily. “You might just have to send me a text every now and then reminding me that you exist. I tend to forget.”

“Oh, I know you fucking do,” Jude laughs, launching his body towards me as he rugby tackles me backwards, my body bouncing off the mattress before getting crushed under his weight.

“Hey!” I proclaim, trying my best to get out a laugh, but instead, it just comes out at a strained wheeze. “I can’t breathe.”

I tap him on the arm until he pulls back a little. “Oh, you can’t, can you?” He smirks down at me, and I know exactly what he’s about to do. Before I can offer a protest, Jude’s hands come down, attacking my stomach in vigorous tickles.

I burst out in a fit of laughter, trying my best to roll out from under him, but he’s straddling my hips, keeping my body tucked firmly underneath him. Despite the protests, Jude only pulls away when his mum walks into the room. Denise stops in her tracks, a stunned expression on her face. “You know what? I’m not even going to ask. Dessert’s ready whenever you want to come down for it.”

“Okay,” Jude responds and with him distracted it gives me time to finally push him off my body so I can shuffle off the bed.

“Right, then,” I say, grabbing his hands to pull him off the bed with me. “Let’s go get some pudding.”

****

Later that night, once everyone has eaten themselves silly, Jude and I are tucked up in bed facing each other just before we finally head to sleep.

“Did you like your gifts?” Jude asks, moving the covers away from my face so he can get a better look at me.

“Yeah, I did,” I nod. Jude had gotten me the last few films I needed to complete my Alfred Hitchcock collection, and the most gorgeous leather jacket I’ve ever seen, one that I know I’ll end up wearing every day for the foreseeable future. “Did you like yours?”

“Mhm,” he nods. “I love the keyring so much, it’s such a thoughtful gift, I can’t wait to keep it with me.”

“Good. It took your mum a while to find the original note so I could take it to the shop and get it engraved, but I’m so glad she did because I think it looks so much better with it in my handwriting rather than some generic font.”

“Yeah, it does. And I can’t even believe she found it, I had no clue that I still had it.”

“I was kind of annoyed that you hadn’t taken it with you to Dortmund. I thought we were better friends than that,” I say a wry smile on my face.

“Knowing you I’m surprised that you haven’t pinned me down and tattooed it onto me by now,” he laughs.

“Oh, that’s such a good idea,” I smack my palm against my forehead. “Why the hell didn’t I think of that? God, I’d love to see you get a tattoo. You’d be squirming in that chair.”

“Excuse me, I have an incredibly high pain tolerance, thank you very much,” he pulls back, offended.

“Jude,” I sigh. “You came with me to get my first tattoo and you literally winced more than me. If you can’t handle the pain when the needle isn’t even touching you, how can you handle it when you’re actually getting ink embedded into your skin?”

“That was sympathy pain,” he tries to defend himself. “You know, because I love you so much.”

“Yeah, right,” I say before right before letting out a large yawn. “I think I’m gonna have to go to bed, I need to be energised for Jobe’s game tomorrow.”

“Yeah, me too,” Jude says, rolling over to switch off his lamp before he rolls back over to place a kiss on my cheek. “Goodnight, love.”

“Night, Darling,” I whisper, shuffling into Jude’s side, bringing his arm towards me, cuddling into his warmth.

Taglist: @eunoiasgoal @4evermyownmuse

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hamiltonfc · 2 months ago

Note

Are we getting chapter 3 today?🥰

yes! it'll be out soon, i'm proofreading it as we speak.

#anon #my works: moth to a flame #hamiltonfc.inbox

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hamiltonfc · 2 months ago

Text

.𖥔 ݁ ˖⋆⭒˚｡⋆ MOTH TO A FLAME; JUDE BELLINGHAM (Chapter Two)

➤ Summary: Surprisingly, Jude and Noah seem to be getting on well, until Noah does something to get in Kaia's bad book.

➤ Pairing: Jude Bellingham x F!OC

➤ Warnings: Swearing, Food mention.

➤ Discussion tag: #my works: moth to a flame (if you ever have any questions about the story, release schedule, etc. my inbox is always open.)

➤ Word Count: 3,171

TAGLIST | SERIES PLAYLIST | SERIES MASTERLIST

Kaia’s POV

“And this is Jude. My best friend.” Silence hangs in the air for a short while after the introductions. My stomach is tied in a knot while I watch Jude take in my new boyfriend. If it were a stranger perceiving Jude, they’d probably say he’s happy to meet him and that he’s happy for his friend. But I’m not a stranger. His body language, the slight strain in his jaw from the way he’s gritting his teeth and the way his eyes quickly flash to mine tells me everything I need to know.

Jude extends his hand in Noah’s direction. “Hey,” he says while Noah’s hand also leaves the side of his body, grasping Jude’s. “Nice to meet you.”

“Nice to meet you, too,” Noah says, quieter than how Jude said it, nerves an obvious thing he’s feeling. The last time Noah came over, and met my family, I knew he had been really nervous, and rightly so because he knows how much my family means to me. But, when it comes to Jude, I had spoken about him so much, about how we had known each other our whole lives, grown up together. Noah knew that Jude meant just as much to me as my family did. However, there was something else about Jude that didn’t threaten Noah, I don’t think (it had threatened other guys in the past), but there was the small fact of Jude being the man in my life. Jude was Noah’s competition, even though I’d told him he had nothing to worry about in the romantic department, and he believed me, Jude’s status in my life was something for Noah, or any other person who wanted to be with me forever, to reach for.

“Oh, hi, Noah,” my mum walks into the room, carrying two plates of food. “Right, these two are for you,” she nods her head at me and Noah so I promptly take my seat across from Jude, as Noah moves to sit right beside me. “Jude, William will be in in a second with your dinner. He’s currently making sure you both get a couple of extra Yorkshire puddings,” Mum flashes Jude a smile. If there was one thing my dad and Jude had in common it was how much they loved my mum’s Yorkshire puddings. Actually, I’m convinced they are the reason my dad decided to marry my mum in the first place.

“You know me so well,” Jude says and it’s then that I see Jude’s first genuine smile since Noah walked through the door. But it’s no surprise because Jude has always been like another son to my mum, he always has a smile for her.

****

“So, Jude,” Dad says when we’re all finally seated and eating. “Are you enjoying it in Madrid?”

“Yeah,” Jude brings his hand up to cover his mouth, pausing his speech while he finishes his food. “It’s great, barely any rain, and the football’s obviously amazing.”

“You know,” it’s my turn to speak now. “These two,” I wave my fork between my parents. “Literally never shut up talking about you. “Like God, forbid we ever see someone we know when they’re out in town because they’ll get a good old rant about how well you’re doing and how proud they are of you. No, but, honestly, I’m starting to think they’re prouder of you than they are of me,” I let out a laugh, everything I said in jest.

“Oh, don’t be silly. But, of course, we’re proud of you, Jude, you know you’re a part of this family,” Mum says. It had always been inevitable that Jude would be part of our family. My mum had been best friends with Jude’s mum, Denise, for years before they even considered having children. So when they did eventually have kids, they became like bonus children for both of them.

I felt, though, when Mum mentioned that Jude was a part of our family, an awkwardness coming from beside me in Noah’s chair. And although I knew Jude appreciated the comment, and knew that he loved my family just as much as they loved him, I could also tell that he was sensing the same thing I was when I caught his eye.

“So, uhm, Noah,” Jude said, clearing his throat, right before taking a sip of his drink, his attention shifting to the man next to you. “How long are you in England for?”

“Oh, erm, I fly back tomorrow,” Noah nodded, shooting a tight-lipped smile Jude’s way.

Jude nods. “So, did you like working with our Kai, then?”

“Kai?” Noah furrows his brow, turning towards me and tilting his head to the side in question.

“Yeah,” I sigh. “He’s always been the only one to call me that.” I shrug. My whole life everyone had just opted to use my full name, apart from Jude, who had insisted on calling me Kai pretty much since the moment he could talk. “It annoys me when anyone else calls me that.”

“Oh,” Noah squints his eyes, puzzled, but turns back to just nonetheless. “But to answer your question, Jude, it was great working with her.”

“Look at that,” Jude points a Noah, but shifts his gaze back to me. “You come with rave reviews and everything.”

I laugh, but Noah’s the one to speak. “I feel like everything I saw about her before we worked together was a rave review, you don’t get called one of the best actors of our generation without doing anything great, do you?”

“Well, I could give her a few reviews just based on her personality, and, let me tell you, not many of them are that great,” Jude smirks are you, bringing his arms up to his chest when I reach over the table to smack him.

“Oi, watch it,” I can’t help but smile at the pair of them as I slump back in my chair. Watching the two of them interact settled my nerves a little. It was almost a given that anyone I invited into my life had to like Jude. Whether it was a boyfriend or a new friend, my loyalty would always be to Jude over anyone, probably until the day that I got married, so it was better to just make sure that they liked him. Why would I want to know someone who disliked my best friend, someone I’d loved my whole life, anyway?

While Jude and Noah got to talking about everything acting and Jude’s football career, I chose to speak to my parents about my next job, which was starting in February, and my summer plans that would follow. Jude overheard the last part of my conversation, “Are you coming to the Euros? You’ll have wrapped by then, yeah?”

This year’s Euros would be Jude’s third international tournament, and seeing as though I had proudly supported him at the last two, I didn’t see why I wouldn’t be going to this one, too.

“Well, that depends,” I placed my knife and fork together on my plate, signifying that I was done. “Are you going to get me free tickets?” I raise my eyebrows at him.

“I’ve already added your name to the family and friends list for tickets, don’t you worry,” Jude tried to wink at me but instead ended up doing a confused blink, to which I let out a giggle. “I can also get tickets for you four as well,” Jude nods towards the rest of my family. “You won’t be in the friends and family section, but I can see what I can do.”

“Thank you for the offer, Jude, darling, but me and Will won’t be able to get any time off work, and these two will still be in school. But we’ll be cheering you on from our living room, there’s no doubt about that. And depending on how well we’re doing, we might book some time off for the final, just in case,” Mum winks at him before pressing a kiss to his temple after she’s gotten up to collect everyone’s plates.

“Don’t listen to her, Jude,” Olivia spoke for the first time since we sat at the table. “I want a ticket to every game, and I mean every single game. I’d do anything to miss a month of school.”

“Don’t be silly, Olivia, you’ve got your GCSEs,” Dad looks up from his phone where he’s most likely scrolling through Twitter looking at Sky Sports News or something in that vein.

“That’s exactly why I want to go, Dad. So Jude, can you get me tickets?” She turns her body fully towards him, exaggeratedly fluttering her eyelashes at him.

“You know, Liv, as much as I’d like you there, you really should listen to your dad. Even I had to do my GCSEs,” Jude tells her.

Olivia scoffs, stands from her chair, and in doing so nearly knocks the thing over. “God, why’s it only Kaia that ever gets to do fun things?”

She’s halfway up to her room before I get to properly reply but it doesn’t stop me from calling her a sore loser. “Perks of being your biggest fan, I guess,” I shrug at Jude, a small smirk on my lips. “Oh, hey, speaking of the Euros, it completely slipped my mind that you’re working in Germany at the same time, aren’t you, Noah?” I turn to look at him.

“Oh, yeah, I’m shooting that show in Berlin,” Noah nods.

“So you’ll be able to go to a few games, then?” My dad looks up from his phone, dragged out of his trance and into the conversation.

“Maybe,” Noah says. “Not sure how much free time I’ll have, but hopefully I’ll be able to get to a couple.”

“If Kaia has anything to do with it, you’ll be going to every single one that’s played in Berlin,” Noah laughs, nodding as he admits defeat, knowing my father is very much correct. It’s a habit of mine to drag people to football matches, even if they’re not the slightest bit interested.

While my dad and Noah talk some more about his job in Berlin, I notice Jude shuffling around in his seat out of the corner of my eye. I could just take it as him being uncomfortable after being sat down for almost an hour, but the way he’s looking at my dad and Noah through his lashes, his chin practically against his chest, tells me otherwise.

“Right, why don’t you kids go hang out upstairs or something while I help clean up this mess?” Dad moves to grab the remaining glasses that are left on the table while Jude, Noah and I get up to go upstairs.

When in my bedroom, Jude immediately goes to sit at my desk, and I can tell that he’s preparing himself for a potentially awkward situation. His hand rests on the wooden surface, tapping away and I know it’s only a matter of time before he pulls a pen out of the pot so he can fiddle with it.

I go to flop on my bed, grabbing my childhood teddy that I bring up to rest on my chest. Noah claims his spot beside me, in a much more graceful manner.

“So,” I say, breaking the silence before it could take over the room. “You wanna watch a film or something?” I look between the two guys in my room, a questioning look on my face.

“Um, yeah, sure,” Jude says. “How about w-”

“Stop right there,” I say, sitting up abruptly. “Before you even ask, no I’m not sitting through Pulp Fiction again. Like yeah, Uma Thurman’s hot as fuck, but she’s also only in it for like ten minutes, so what’s the point?”

“Whoah, I wasn’t even about to say that, dickhead,” Jude annoyingly shakes his head at me while he tosses a rubber in my direction, narrowly missing my head. “I was actually going to suggest that Noah picked what we watched, so, you know, it could save the arguing, and then you started yelling at me anyway.”

“Oh, okay, good idea,” I turn towards Noah. “Is there anything you’d like to watch, Noah?”

“Hmm, that’s a hard choice,” Noah says, a deep-thinking expression on his face. “I think I’d like to watch Pulp Fiction.”

Jude burst out laughing and I feel my face drop in agony at the thought of watching it again. I’m genuinely about two seconds away from punching my boyfriend right across the face.

“Oh, Kai, you should see your face. Nice one, Noah,” Jude’s holding his stomach at this point.

“What?” Noah says when Jude calms himself down. “I’ve never seen it.”

That’s the moment both Jude and I stop what we’re doing, turning to face Noah with, what I can only imagine are, the most shocked expressions the two of us could muster.

I let out a laugh of disbelief before finding the words. “You what?”

“Did I hear you right?” Jude pipes up as well.

I’ve never seen Pulp Fiction,” Noah repeats, causing me to lay back down, simply staring at the ceiling while I try and get over my shock.

“An actor who’s never seen Pulp Fiction, well I never.” I raise a finger in the air when I’ve had about ten seconds to process the mindblowing news. “You know what I think we have to do, Jude?” I sit up on my elbows so I can look at him properly. “Pop his Pulp Fiction cherry.”

Jude nods as soon as the suggestion leaves my mouth. “It’s only right.”

“Pulp Fiction it is then,” I’m just about to get up from my bed to grab the DVD, when the door of my bedroom bursts open, with a boisterous seven-year-old on the other side.

Leo immediately rushes over to the side of the bed Noah is at. “Hi, Noah, would you like to come and play Roblox with me?”

The look on Leo’s face is adorable. His big, brown eyes look at my boyfriend with so much adoration, even though he’s only met him once before. But Noah doesn’t seem to like Leo as much as the young boy likes him.

“Oh, I- uhm,” Noah, fidgets, barely making eye contact with him, while I watch on with furrowed brows. “I don’t know how.”

“Well, that’s fine, I can teach you,” Leo bounces in excitement on the balls of his feet. There’s nothing in the world that makes him happier than when he’s playing Roblox.

“Well, I don’t really want to,” Noah says bluntly, leading to Leo’s face dropping, a little pout forming on his lips.

“Oh, okay,” Leo says sadly and I can tell by the sound of his voice that he’s getting choked up.

He’s about the leave the room when Jude stands up and walks over to him. Getting on one knee in front of him, he places his hands on the small boy’s shoulders. “Hey, I’ll come and play with you, yeah? we can play that one we were playing last time that you kept beating me at.” Jude picks Leo up, throwing him over his shoulder, causing him to giggle louder than ever. It’s a giggle that can be heard all the way down the hall until they get to Leo’s bedroom.

My room is silent for a while, allowing me quite a bit of time to think about what I just witnessed. The only thing I can think about, though, is that I didn’t say or do anything while Leo was in the room with me. I should’ve done something to make sure he didn’t get upset, not even a little bit.

After a little more time, I say, “What the fuck was that?” I turn to Noah, who has barely moved since Jude and Leo left the room.

“I don’t know, he says, eyes failing to meet mine.

“That’s not good enough, Noah, you almost made him cry because you didn’t want to play with him. He’d be really upset if it wasn’t for Jude being here,” I let out a sigh. It was bad enough thinking about seeing either of my siblings upset but seeing Leo’s face for that short moment that he thought no one wanted to play with him was heartbreaking.

“I’m not good with kids, okay?” I have no idea what to do with them,” Noah says, raising his voice a little.

“Then just let him down easily, then, there was no need to be rude. He’s seven, Noah. He only wanted to play with you, you’re never going to get good with kids if you’re never willing to spend even ten minutes with one,” I scowl at him, mad with him for what he did to my little brother. “You know, it’s probably better if we call it a night, I’m quite tired.”

Noah nods. “Okay,” he gets up from the bed. “I’ll see you after Christmas, I suppose,” he leans down to press a kiss to my lips, which I accept, kissing back gently, but he knows that I’m still pissed off at him and that I’m probably going to be like that for a while longer. I shift my body to get off the bed. “It’s fine, I’ll let myself out.”

“Okay,” you nod. “Night. Merry Christmas.”

“Yeah, Merry Christmas,” he says, closing the door behind him on his way out.

I fall back onto the bed, once again finding peace against my duvet, a sigh falling from my lips being the last thing I remember before I slip into a deep sleep.

****

Jude: You okay Sleeping Beauty?

Kaia: God when did I fall asleep? Kaia: Also why are you still up? It’s 3am.

Jude: About 7:30ish. Jude: And I’m not tired but I also wanted to make sure you were okay.

Kaia: I’m doing fine. Kaia: Just shocked me a little that’s all. Kaia: Was Leo okay when you were playing with him?

Jude: Yeah but he did ask why Noah didn’t want to play with him so I just told him that he knew I wanted to play with him instead. Jude: But what he did was really fucked up.

Kaia: I know. Kaia: I'm glad he’s not really upset about it though. Kaia: And thank you for saying what you did. I think I’m still going to take him out for ice cream or something tomorrow tho just to make sure he’s okay.

Jude: No problem and yeah that’ll be good for him. Jude: So did he just leave?

Kaia: no I said it’d probably be best if we called it a night. Kaia: I made it clear that I was pissed at him so that’s why I think he was so fine with leaving early.

Jude: You did the right thing he can’t talk to a kid like that without knowing that he did was wrong. Jude: Anyway I’m off to bed. See you on Christmas day. x

Kaia: Yep, goodnight. x

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