#but the version with the riffs is so much better

[inhuman-obey-me]

do you remember the ask you did for the brothers about mc catching them doing something demonic?? could you do that but with the side characters?

Hi hello this is WAY overdue and I am so sorry it's taken this long to get around to it if you're even still around!! But yes, definitely wanted to do a version with the side characters for this. These...got much longer than the previous ones, so please take that as an apology for taking years to get to this.

Previous post referenced can be found here!

[Mod Cosmos]

MC accidentally catching the Side Characters being Demonic or Violent

content warning: blood, gore, implied body horror

Note: As before, this is from the perspective of an MC that might just not want to necessarily see all this

DIAVOLO

You were staying the night at the Demon Lord's Castle, exhausted after a long day running around with Diavolo. Despite your exhaustion, you find yourself waking up in the middle of the night — and notice that the Demon Prince is no longer resting beside you. Wondering where he's gone and figuring he must have had something to do, you try and fall back asleep, but to no avail. After some tossing and turning, you decide to get up and take a walk to the garden, hoping that its usual tranquility will help bring back the slumber that now escapes you.

On your way, you hear a distant crash, like glass shattering against stone. Remembering the many stories of how haunted the castle was, a chill creeps down your spine. You know its better to leave it be (just go to the garden, you tell yourself) but your curiosity gets the better of you, as it always does. With careful steps, you make your way down the hall from where you heard the crash, the portraits on the wall watching your every move with morbid glee. Every cell in your body is screaming for you to turn back, and you almost do — until you hear a hysterical laugh swiftly cut off by an agonized yell. A muffled voice soon follows, and you recognize it well.

"Your mistake, like all your predecessors, is mistaking my tolerance for weakness." Diavolo's voice becomes clear as you creep towards an archway, and your heart leaps into your throat at the scene before you. Blood stains the walls, a demon you don't recognize made further unrecognizable by the disfigurement of his flesh, as if it was melting from his bones. "A pity it had to come to this, Guthor. I'll send my regards to your little association." The mockery in the prince's voice is rare to hear, and in a flash the other demon is reduced to nothing but cinders.

"—MC?" Your startled at the sound of your name, and before you can blink you find yourself staring into worried golden eyes. "What are you doing here?! You should be asleep." His four wings fully unfurl, as if to block your view of the gruesome remains. "I…I apologize that you witnessed that." He cups your chin, taking in your unsettled expression. "I'll answer any questions you have, but let's first return to my room, shall we? I'll get you whatever you need."

BARBATOS

Your whole body vibrates as bass, drums, and discordant guitar riffs pour out the speakers at Tartarus Hall, a metal show well underway. It's not the usual environment one would find Barbatos, but you jumped at the chance to accompany him to the show when he cautiously offered. It delighted you to see him outside of the stiffness of his day-to-day duties, and although he still doesn't seem to break too much from his usual statuesque nature, you can certainly tell he's more relaxed.

Eventually deciding to take a break from the rowdy crowd, the two of you make your way to the bar for some much needed refreshments. As Barbatos hands you a drink, you notice something grabs his attention — and an ominous shadow falls over his features. Positioning you safely in a corner by the bar, Barbatos gives you a small smile.

"I'm going to use the restroom, so please stay here until I get back."

You nod and wait patiently, enjoying the music from a distance while sipping your drink, wondering what it was that really captured his attention. After a while, you find yourself with an empty glass and still no Barbatos in sight, so you decide you'll make a quick trip to the restroom yourself. After asking the bartender to let your demon companion know of your whereabouts if he gets back before you do, you make your way through the crowd and down a narrow hall lit with neon signs — and that's when you start to hear it. Screams.

At first, you wonder if its just from the vocalist on stage, but it sounds far closer to you than from the speakers. With a gulp, you cautiously turn a corner and can soon make out a familiar voice, muffled behind a door that isn't quite closed all the way. Peering in, you see Barbatos towering over another, a sharp object in his hand glistening with blood. You stomach twists. "I wish I could have more time with you, but I must return to someone far more important." He sighs, ignoring the other's pleas for mercy. "All you traitors sing the same."

In an instant, the other demon is dead on the floor. Before you can even move to take a step back, you find yourself face-to-face with Barbatos, a gasp leaving your lips as his tail captures your waist and pulls you away from the scene and back to the neon corridor.

"You can't help yourself, can you, dear?" Barbatos scolds, though his gaze softens as he checks you over. "I apologize for leaving you for so long, and for having to witness that. Let's go enjoy the rest of the show for now, shall we?"

SIMEON

It had been some time since your last visit to the human world, so Simeon had decided to gift you with a surprise trip — just the two of you, enjoying all that this coastal city had to offer. There was also a local festival in full swing, which meant dragging Simeon stall to stall to try a variety of food and play some games. You both eventually take a break away from all the festivities to enjoy the sunset, the last rays of the daylight disappearing into the horizon as waves crash on rocks below. You turn to smile at Simeon, but notice that something feels…off. In fact, you had sensed a feeling of tension from him since an encounter earlier that day with a less-than-friendly stranger.

"Simeon? Are you okay? You're not still thinking about that guy, are you?"

"Hm? Oh, yes, I'm sorry." Whatever darkness his eyes held a moment ago disappears, his gaze gentle as he looks to you. "Just a little tired, not to worry. Why don't you go look at some souvenirs," he motions to a cute store a few steps away, "…to bring back for the others, and I'll go fetch us some coffee?"

You agree, though can't quite shake off your concern. Watching from the corner of your eye, you see Simeon wander off before turning into an alley. Leaving the souvenir shopping behind, you decide to follow the angel to see what he's really up to. It's quieter in this part of town, and even quieter in the alley with no cafe in sight. You hear a dull thud and quickly follow the noise, peeking around a corner down another alley — only to freeze at what you saw.

It's a dead-end, and a man is backed up against the brick wall, holding a knife out towards Simeon as if in self-defense. You recognize the man as the one who had harassed you earlier, nearly bruising your arm when he tried to drag you off somewhere. You had managed to shake him off and thought that was the end of it, but Simeon clearly had other ideas.

An ethereal glow emanates from the angel, your eyes beginning to sting as your vision becomes slightly warped. The man opens his mouth as if to scream, but no sound comes out, and he drops his knife to the floor. "You are lucky I am only giving you a warning," Simeon's voice seems to echo, his hand now splayed out across the other's chest. "Reflect on your actions and repent, or next time you won't be so lucky."

A flash of light momentarily blinds you, causing you to stumble back. As you regain a sense of your surroundings, you find your face cupped by gentle hands and your gaze met with bewildered celestial eyes.

"MC! I…I'm sorry. That man continued to follow us throughout the day and was intent on hurting you." His voice is full of worry, his fingers flitting across your body to ensure that you were okay. "You weren't supposed to see that."

"Is he—?" You begin to ask.

"He'll be fine, just…terrified for quite some time." Simeon clears his throat, his features showing relief once he's confirmed you're not harmed. "Let's go get something to eat, okay? Whatever you want."

SOLOMON

The last few weeks had been a whirlwind, filled with various events and obligations that had kept you away from your sorcerer studies with Solomon. Far overdue for a lesson, you were finally getting together tonight to practice a few new complicated spells. You decide to stop by the market to pick up a few snacks, texting Solomon to ask if there's anything he wants. A few minutes pass and he fails to respond, so you give him a quick call, assuming he's probably not paying attention to his DDD.

No answer. You sigh and decide to just get what you know he likes before making your way to Purgatory Hall. Taking the more scenic route, you leisurely walk through one of your favorite parks, going over some of the spells in your head — but your mind begins to wander as you notice that Solomon still hasn't returned your texts or call, even though he should be expecting you later. He was usually quick to respond, especially when it came to his "favorite apprentice", as he so often said. He's probably just deep in one of his books or experiments, you assure yourself, but the slight sense of unease forming in your stomach won't go away.

Then, you sense it. A faint warmth on your hand coming from the sorcerer's ring that Solomon had gifted you. He had recently imbued a spell on both your ring and his to let you know when the other was close, but you still were no where near Purgatory Hall. Rather, the ring was pulling you towards another path that went into the forest.

"Stop, stop! I'm sorry, okay?!" You eventually hear a coarse voice, so you quietly hide behind a tree and peer around to see what's going on, eyes widening at what you find. A demon seems to be brutally bound to the floor, blood seeping from his eyes and mouth as he looks up and pleads to the sorcerer who put him in such a position.

"Coming to your senses after you tried to take away mine?" Solomon answers in a mocking and cold tone. "You should have known better than to try your tricks on me, Pinen." He takes a few steps towards the demon, squatting down to get more to his level. "And," his voice is dangerously low and furious, "…you should have thought twice before trying to threaten my apprentice. Have fun getting out of this one."

The demon opens his mouth to scream, but you blink and he's gone. You blink again and find Solomon before you, his hands gently gripping your shoulders and worry in his eyes, a shadow of guilt on his features. Of course, he must have sensed you were nearby.

"Hey, I'm sorry, I didn't mean for you to get caught up in this." He glances down and scoops up the bag that you must have dropped at some point. "I'll explain what happened and what I did once we're out of here, okay?"

[skyguytoast]

𝐃𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐒𝐀𝐌 𝐌𝐎𝐍𝐑𝐎𝐄 𝐖𝐎𝐔𝐋𝐃 𝐁𝐄 𝐋𝐈𝐊𝐄....

warning: some of the headcanons are explict, +18.

a/n: hii again, i guess writing headcanons allow me to pour out my thoughts about this movie, hope you enjoy and if you fell like comment or reblog, this literally makes my day😻😻

• Sam would never openly admit he was in love—not at first. Instead, he’d annoy you just to get a reaction. A poke to your ribs, flicking a paper ball at your head, pulling your hair lightly when you weren’t paying attention. He thrived off of your exasperated looks and playful shoves, convincing himself it was just fun. But deep down, it scared the hell out of him—this thing he was feeling, this pull toward you he couldn’t ignore. • When Sam finally admitted his feelings to himself, he didn’t waste time hiding them from you. No grand gestures, no cheesy romance movie confessions—just raw honesty. One night, while you sat together, he fidgeted with his rings before finally muttering, "I think about you all the time. And I don’t know what to do about it." His voice was quiet, but his eyes held nothing but sincerity. • Your first kiss wasn’t planned—it just happened. You leaned in to kiss his cheek, and at the last second, he turned his head, your lips colliding in an accidental but electric moment. You froze, staring at each other for what felt like forever, before his hand found your face, adjusting the angle—then he kissed you for real, slow and deliberate, as if he was memorizing every second. • Sam never officially asked you to be his girlfriend —he just assumed you were. You liked each other, you spent all your time together, so why did you need labels? But when he noticed how much it would mean to you, he actually tried. He showed up at your place, awkwardly holding a bouquet of your favorite flowers, and grumbled, "So... do you, uh, wanna make this official or something?" • Sam wasn’t big on PDA, but he always made sure you felt his presence. A hand resting on your back, fingers hooked into your belt loops, a casual arm around your waist when he pulled you close. Sitting together, his hand would absentmindedly rest on your thigh, tracing tiny circles with his thumb. It was never too much—just enough to remind you that you were his. • Behind closed doors, though? Sam was needy. He always had to be touching you—arms wrapped around your waist, head resting in your lap, kissing your temple as he pulled you against his chest. At night, he’d curl up behind you, pressing sleepy kisses to the back of your neck before muttering, "You’re stuck with me, you know that?" like some sort of half-assed love confession. • He made you a playlist, and it was the closest thing to a love letter you’d ever get from him. The songs were scrawled onto the back of a CD cover, his handwriting messy but unmistakable. You skimmed the tracklist and smirked. "'Can’t Take My Eyes Off You'?" you teased. "Didn’t take you for a Frankie Valli guy." He shrugged, avoiding eye contact. "You like it, don’t you?" • Even though he’d never say it outright, Sam loved how you listened to him. When he rambled about obscure bands, the evolution of punk, or why a specific 1979 guitar riff was way better than its 1980s version, you actually listened. You asked questions, nodded at the right moments, and even remembered random facts he told you weeks ago. It made something in his chest go tight. • You had a habit of stealing his sweatshirts and t-shirts, and even though he grumbled, he secretly loved it. Seeing you in his oversized hoodie, drowning in his scent, made something primal in him soften. One day, he crossed his arms and smirked, "So, uh… think I could borrow my sweatshirt back? Or are you just gonna take over my whole closet?" • Sam wasn’t the type to talk about the future, but in quiet moments, he let it slip. Like when you were sprawled across his bed, talking about nothing, and he absentmindedly murmured, "You know, I’d go anywhere with you." Or when he pressed a kiss to your forehead and whispered, "I don’t know how you put up with me, but I hope you never stop." Because even if he didn’t say the words I love you all the time, you felt it in every little thing he did.

+𝟏𝟖 (𝐒𝐏𝐈𝐂𝐘 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐂𝐀𝐍𝐎𝐍𝐒)

• You were Sam's first time. Before you, he had only known the fleeting pleasure of his own hand and imagination. He had touched himself countless times, stroking his hardening cock until thick ropes of cum painted his stomach. But nothing could have prepared him for the ethereal, overwhelming sensation of being inside your tight, wet heat. Your body was his new temple, and he wanted to worship every inch of it. With each thrust, each deep stroke, Sam felt a primal connection, a claiming that transcended the physical. You were his now, in a way he had never belonged to anyone before.

• Sam whines and whimper whenever you give him a blowjob. When your luscious lips wrap around the head of his cock, Sam is helpless to keep quiet. Guttural moans and whimpers tear from his throat, his back arching off the bed as he fists the sheets for support. Tears of overwhelming sensation prick the corners of his eyes, his vision blurring as you take him deeper, your nose pressing against his pelvis. The wet heat of your mouth, the flick of your tongue, the gentle suction - it's all too much, yet not enough. Sam's balls tighten, his cock pulsing and throbbing against your tongue as he fights the urge to thrust into your mouth, to fuck your face until he paints your throat with his release.

• Sam adores being at the mercy of your desires, in the delicious agony of giving up control. He loves the feeling of your body moving above him, your breasts bouncing hypnotically as you ride him with wild abandon. The sight of you taking your pleasure from him, using him for your own satisfaction, is the ultimate turn-on. Sam's hands roam your body, squeezing the globes of your ass, thumbing your nipples, mapping every dip and curve. He wants to learn you by touch alone, to commit your body to memory. As you chase your orgasm, Sam loses himself in the erotic dance of your coupling, drunk on the sensation of being so deeply, thoroughly fucked.

• But Sam also knows how to take charge when you need him to, to give you what you crave. He pins your wrists above your head, his fingers sinking into the soft flesh as he holds you down, immobilizing you completely. His hips snap forward, driving into you with a force that rocks the bed and shakes the headboard against the wall. The room fills with the obscene sound of skin slapping against skin, of your desperate moans and his whining grunts. Sam's blue eyes darken with lust and possession, his gaze boring into yours as he marks your body with his touch, his teeth, his cock.

• In the missionary position, Sam braces himself above you, his arms trembling with the effort of holding back, wanting to prolong the moment. As he feels his climax approaching, Sam buries his face between your perfect breasts, motorboating your cleavage and breathing in your intoxicating scent. He nips and sucks at the sensitive skin, determined to mark you as his. As his orgasm builds, Sam's grip on your hips tightens, his fingers sinking into the soft flesh, no doubt leaving bruises behind. With a whimper that's part pleasure, part pain, Sam hilts inside you one last time as he comes, his cock pulsing and jerking, flooding your womb with his hot, thick seed. His face remains buried in your cleavage as his body shaking with the force of his release. In that moment, Sam knows he would do anything, anything at all, to keep you by his side, to hold onto this feeling of utter completion and belonging. You are his, and he is yours, and nothing will ever tear you apart.

[puppyboymikeyway]

little mcr things in songs that i would drop to my knees for

THE GUITAR AT THE BEGINNING OF DISENCHANTED

ITS SO SWEET

'GET. UP. COWARD.'

'run run bunny run' in scarecrow and how it gradually gets louder until gerard is yelling

UHM?? MIKEYS LITTLE 'FUCKIN READY' IN VAMPIRE MONEY?? LIKE BBG PLEASE GIVE US MORE??

the start of kiss the ring?? like?? perfection??

the sweet little guitar part in demolition lovers at the start like go ray! play your silly little riff!

the bassline to planetary(go!)(i have never once called this song just 'planetary'. its always been planetary go to me) is super funky and i absolutely love it. and i remember mikey saying how that was the hardest bassline that hes played or stage or smt like that<3

THE SILLY LITTLE COWBOY THEME AT THE START OF HANG EM HIGH?? LIKE?? I LOVE IT BUT WHY??

that silly riff during dead! that sounds like woody the woodpecker

8 bitter years - 9 bitter years - 10 FUCKING YEARS

romance. all of it. fuck you if you dont like romance. i would die for this little thing

'dO YOU HAVE THE KEYS TO THE HOTEL-'

the peppy little drums at the start of cemetery drive

'sosendmyresignationtothebrideandthegroom'

'hair bACK, MOTHERFUCKER'

THE INTRO TO GIVE EM HELL KID WHERE ITS JUST MIKEY PLAYING AND YOU CAN REALLY HEAR THE BASSLINE. SHIVERS, BRO

also the bassline to headfirst for halos?? and the guitar at the start?? like i love this song too much??

at this point just bullets. all of it. the entire album. so underrated tbh. fuck anyone who doesnt like bullets

'YOU SHOULDVE RAISED A BABYGIRL I SHOULDVE BEEN A BETTER SON' absolute trans anthem right here, folks

the piano throughout blood is just so happy for no reason like hun, this is not the song for this-

the little 'ooooooooo's in all the angels

the howling in house of wolves??? like it fits so perfectly, guys(ive been informed its not howling??? at the beginning?? am i going crazy??)

'so shut your eyyyyess kiss me goodbyeeee and SLEEEEEEEEEEEPP' 10/10

i will never not love the guitar at the start of na na na and it sucks that the only version you can hear it alone and more isolated is the version off of mdnsy but thank god we at least have that version. i love the lil riff at the start<3

the kids from yesterday. all of it. the electro-themed start and then the sNARE- PHMYGOD GUYS. PLEASE DO NOT OVERLOOK THIS SONG

'from the earth to the morgue morgue morgue MOOOOOOOORRRRRRRGUE WELL TONIIIIGHT WILL IT EVER COOOME?'

ray and franks backing vocals during planetary!! the little wooahs! i love them!<3

the drums at the beginning of burn bright??

the way gerard sings television in boy division like 'teLAviSION'

'well it better be BLACK and it better be TIGHT and it better be JUST. MY. SIZE. - well it better be WHITE and it better be CUT and it better be JUST. MY. SIZE.'

WE DONT NEED ANOTHER SONG ABOUT CALIFORNIA. ALL OF IT. I LOVE THAT SONG AND NO ONE TALKS ABOUT IT.

'STOP AND STARE AT THE ACCIDENTS AND STARS THAT BORE YOU'

THATS MY FAVORITE MCR LYRIC GUYS

'louder than gods revolver and TWICE AS SHINY'

okay wait this list was longer than i intended but reblog with your favorite little snippets of mcr songs!!(i keep updating this i need to stop)(i updated it again help)(yet again another update for grammar)

[isagrimorie]

[initial reactions] Superman 2025

Maybe hope is punk. 

I already posted my non-spoiler reactions earlier I’m going to add a little more. 

(Before anything else, I wanted to say that Superman 2025 has both a mid-credit and a post-credit scenes. They’re not plot relevant to a new movie, but it is fun little world building and relationship building bites.)

things i really liked (non-spoiler version) 

I really enjoyed how lived in this DCU is, this is a world that is already used to having the fantastic walk among them and almost have the fantastic be something mundane. Superheroes walk amongst them and eat in diners next to the populace. 

This isn’t like where the world is just getting used to the idea of super powered people, this is a populace that grew up with the reality of gods and monsters. This is something the MCU has been very inconsistent with world building wise. 

The movie is set in Metropolis. Do you know how much time I’ve waited for a Liveaction Clark Kent/Superman to start operating and living in Metropolis and not Smallville? A Damned Long Time. Smallville, the Metropolis years almost got there but Not really, since Clark wasn’t Superman yet and the next we see Tom Welling’s Clark he returned to Smallville and GAVE UP HIS POWERS, WTF. 

And then, I gave Superman and Lois a chance, I’ve mellowed on Hoechlin… kind of, like I get that he does a good Superman and a better Clark but Elizabeth Tulloch’s Lois was the winner there. But you know what S&L did? THEY MOVED TO SMALLVILLE. 

It took ten years to get Smallville Clark out of Smallville and it took until 2025 for us to finally have a Clark/Superman living and operating in Metropolis. I’VE WAITED A LONG TIME FOR THIS. 

LOIS LANE. Hands down I think Rachel Brosnahan has jumped to the top of my favorite movie Lois Lanes. She is Lois from the first moment she walked on screen to the last. A punk to her very core, inquisitive and brave. 

Nicholas Hoult is now my second favorite Lex Luthor. I also liked the Luthor on Superman and Lois. Unfortunately, I didn’t stick around with CW Supergirl to get to Lex Luthor version, who is apparently really good too. But Hoult’s Lex is the embodiment of Lex. The Hater, petty Lex. I can also see the influences from Michael Rosenbaum Lex, which Hoult said he took inspiration from. 

In fact both Nicholas Hoult and David Corenswet admitted their first exposure to Superman was through Smallville, and this is why it is important for Superman to always have some TV presence. They’re the gateway to Superman. 

I loved the music and the various riffs of the John Williams Superman march. But I also get why people wish David Corenswet’s Superman had a new Superman theme for himself. 

I may not be the greatest fan of Hans Zimmerman’s Superman theme but I also appreciate what it did for Cavill’s Superman. 

Mr. Terrific is amazing. It’s such a Take That to how that one X-Men movie screwed up with Edi Gathegi’s Darwin character. He was so much fun to watch! 

Guy Gardner and Hawkgirl were also fun, unfortunately, I think Hawkgirl was a little underserved. 

things that could be improved

I mentioned that this is an awesome comic book movie and it is and leans into it and all the best ways but also, it kind of feels like an episodic movie ripped out from a season of Superman: the Animated Series, or even of My Adventures of Superman, which I tell you is more and more like it. But it jarringly feels like it was edited like one too. It didn’t toss me out of the immersion, it’s just that some of the transitions felt noticeable. 

Anyway New Rockstars said that this Superman is Gunn’s best movie to date and that’s where I went. Oh hey, easy there, pardner. Gunn’s best movie made? I don’t share the sentiment. I would put Superman 2025 as something on the level of Guardians of  the Galaxy Vol. 1. A fun, romp of a movie but not the best. Let Gunn work up to that title first. 

In terms of cinematography this movie has its moments but if you liked the grand scope and epic shots and the quiet moments Snyder brought into Man of Steel* which I also really liked, loved even, the comic book-ness might not be your cup of tea, visually and tonally speaking and that’s okay. 

*(I have big issues with some other things in MoS but that’s not what we’re talking about).

I’ll be talking about the plot 

SPOILERS BELOW

One of the frequent criticisms I saw was that James Gunn just stole the plot from Batman v Superman. I rolled my eyes at that point and continue too because having rewatched Smallville, My Adventures of Superman, and some episodes of Superman & Lois its just inevitable that the question of Superman over stepping and being questioned on his sincerity will be brought up. 

In fact, some podcasts are kind of tired with this plot, and I get it. But Gunn did not steal this plot from Batman v Superman. In fact, this plot is more similar to Smallville’s Hero Registration Act arc than anything else. 

This Superman wears his heart on his sleeve, he’s only been operating as Superman for three years. He is still a rookie hero. He makes rookie mistakes and trusts too willingly, something that frustrates Lois to no end. 

But this Clark has also kind of distanced himself from his parents, he hasn’t visited the farm in a while. I think it’s because he thought he found his place in his Fortress of Solitude and having Jor-El and Lara’s message to him played on repeat. He’s lonely and latched on to this piece of his heritage. 

Sidenote: I love that Lara is included in this message because a lot of the time, Lara is forgotten and hardly mentioned to Clark. 

This Clark is also a little cocky, especially with how he thought Lois interviewing Superman meant that Lois would give him softball questions. LOL. Clark, you dumbass. 

Lois doesn’t know what a softball question even is. She doesn’t write fluff pieces. Clark mentions how he’s media trained but he only said that because the doofus has been interviewing himself. Something Lois pokes at several times. 

Lois pointedly asked him several times about how he interfered in a war. Clark gets riled up and agitated because, guess what? He wasn’t media trained. He isn’t used to someone questioning him. 

I love that this causes friction between Lois and Clark, because it should. Lois isn’t gonna handle Clark with kid gloves just because they were in a relationship. I love that it’s something on both their minds and Clark apologized how poorly he handled it. 

The main thing threat of the movie though is very much Lex Luthor. So far he is the BEST cinematic Lex Luthor. Hands down, no question. The Haterism from Lex floweth free. Every single thing that can go wrong on Superman’s life, he will try to accomplish. 

Caught in the crossfire are the other metahuman heroes like Guy Gardner, Mr. Terrific, and Hawkgirl, and Metamorpho and the various Humans like Rick Flag Sr., Near the end of the movie, the other DOD person with Flag Sr., pointed out that the metahumans have just gone and interfered in another sticky international matter again without oversight. And this feels like it’s a larger issue that might cross all the other DCU movies and shows. 

As I’ve said earlier, I love how active Lois is in this movie. She doesn’t stop, and she’s always thinking and she’s trying to figure out her own feelings for Clark Kent. She can smell a scam a mile away and she’s always questioning. But even as she’s questioning her relationship with Clark (because of her own misgivings and her own self doubt about how bad she is with relationships). 

Then Lex invades the fortress of solitude and takes a recording of Clark’s parents that had the first half containing how much they loved him. The second part of the recording was damaged but then somehow ‘retrieved’ by the Engineer, it claimed that both Jor-El and Lara wanted their son to rule over Earth and have a harem of women and have lots of children. 

I am still skeptical at this message, even as many people profess is genuine. I feel the next movie will have a twist in it that will say, no that’s not what it says. 

So Lex leaks the message to all the news outlets and does an interview himself. Clark is so shook but also realized that Lex invaded the FoS and arrives to find his robots destroyed and Krypto, missing. 

TLDR. Everything goes down and Clark as Superman allows himself to be arrested and he’s instantly brought somewhere else where other metahuman like him are imprisoned. There’s a lot that went down there that when he escapes with the help of Metamorpho, Mr Terrific and Lois. Clark is shaken and overwhelmed, and Lois brings Clark to Smallville to recuperate.

(Before this, Lois reveals to Clark she was a punk kid growing up, and Clark claims he also liked punk stuff. Lois retorts a heart on sleeve guy like him can’t be punk. Clark returns that maybe being hopeful and open hearted is punk).

This is where Lois realizes that while she knows Clark the reporter and Superman the invincible hero, this is the first time Lois saw him as Clark. Clark who grew-up and had parents.

A Clark who listened to pop rock bands he claims are punk but Lois claims aren’t. As I suspected in a trailer shot of Lois looking at Clark being tended to by Jonathan and Martha Kent, this plays a big part where Lois solidifies what she feels for Clark.

The next morning Clark wakes up with Krypto resting on his chest with the sun on his face but he’s far from refreshed. 

And this is a scene in the Kent farm that I wish had more time to cook, because honestly I also wanted more Martha Kent. She’s supportive and no nonsense but I wish there was more there, there you know? 

While I did give kudos to Gunn bringing in Lara, I have to say the moms are under served. Even Pa Kent is too. This is where the weakness of the format comes in because Superman 2025 even though is the best comic book movie Superman… it also feels like its an episode lifted from a Superman TV show or comic book issue. We’re landed in media res, into a week into Superman’s life. And it is frustrating because I wanted more, more time, more everything. 

Pa Kent essentially tells him, who he is and wants to do doesn’t depend on what his parents tell him. It depends on what Clark chooses to do. 

The beauty of having the Justice Society League Gang is that Clark has someone to call for back-up to help when he has to do something else. This is how Superman’s able to handle the catastrophic dimensional rift that opened in Metropolis and discover who Ultraman was, who if you know the speculation wasn’t a surprise was a mindless clone of Clark. Krypto help defeat Ultraman and tossed into a blackhole (who I bet will become Bizarro or Doomsday) 

In the end, Clark as Superman was able to bring about his thesis statement: He is flawed and Human and he screws up and growing up Human, being Human is his greatest strength. He may have been born a Kryptonian but he’s also very much Human. 

Lois writes or has her article transcribe via Jimmy and releases her damning report about Lex Luthor just in time, spreading the word about the truth of Luthor’s crimes. It is quaint now and harkens to a different time where the truth can be a catalyst for change. The third act Lois doesn’t have a lot to do, unfortunately and what she does happens on screen while piloting Mr Terrific’s ship, flying what is essentially the Daily Planet’s senior staff. 

This ends in a stare down between a defeated Lex and an empowered Superman. Lois and Superman meet in the streets, after Lex is arrested. Superman tells Lois that he would like to give an interview to Lois, they enter a building with no one in it and Clark sweeps Lois into an epic kiss. 

Before the movie ends, Kara sweeps into the Fortress of Solitude to get ‘her dog’, it turns out that Krypto is Kara’s. She’s clearly drunk and is a mess, and they fly away. Earlier when Lex abducted Krypto and Clark’s expending effort to search for him, Lois asked him why all this effort for his dog. 

And then Clark tells Lois that Krypto might be all alone out there and scared and its clear he projected his feelings on to Krypto but also, its clear Clark was also talking about his cousin, Kara. 

Who is also all alone now, and maybe afraid, and maybe even a lot angrier than he is for losing a planet he has no memory of. 

The movie then ends with Clark watching videos of his parents but this time what’s projected is a video of his Earth Parents, signaling that he’s reconnected with his Human roots. 

In terms of cinematography there are lovely moments and points here but a controversial opinion: I think that this is on par with Guardians of the Galaxy vol 1 which is fun and nice but had room to cook and grow. But also, I think what will happen is that Fantastic Four: first steps will come out as a more polished movie than Superman 2025. And that’s okay. 

[asherthehimbo]

Love talk - Song Mingi

prev | M. list | next chapter | [WITH MY BIAS?]

words: 2.3K

notes: warnings, mature language, Mingi going through it, HONGJOONG is going throigh it bro somebody save him

“I'm still not seeing him, what if he's really not here, what if I lost my one chance to be with the love of my life because I was stupid and clumsy and spilled water over a fucking card when I should've put the number in my phone the moment I saw the card. Or what if he is here and he doesn't recognize me because my hair is different what if-” Mingi's panic is stopped by Yunho, “Calm down” it's simple and had it been anybody else those words would not serve to soothe him, but Yunho's been his rock for longer than he could remember and they offer at least a bit of comfort.

Sitting in a Vip box right in front of the stage, Mingi and the rest of his members try and look around for the person Mingi described, it's a break in the concert and the first half had been great, the lead guitarist Hongjoong loves was back and had even angled his guitar in their direction a couple of times, whatever that meant. He was dressed differently from the other members of his band, his whole body covered, almost in a cultish cloak which matches with the vibe of the first few songs, but Mingi couldn't bring himself to focus on that too much.

He was constantly looking back, trying to spot the mess of pink hair between the see of bright pinks and blacks behind him, it was fruitless, he knew the area was too big for him to see [Name] by himself, and his friends had agreed to help during the breaks but they had been invested in the concert whenever the music riff would start. Something about the lead singer's voice seemed almost familiar, calling out to him but he pushed it back, ignored it in favor of looking through the crowds, it may seem disrespectful but he'd apologize after the show, they would understand right?

“I can't just calm down Yunho, I know you guys think it's silly and that I only knew him for a week but it was- It was just so real. It was like he knew me, like I knew him. He held me like I was the one thing he'd been searching for and it couldn't have been just my own mind Yunho, and I hate it. I hate it because the thought of not seeing him again didn't even cross my mind. I've started to forget his voice, do you know how much that breaks me?“ Mingi is almost crying, not caring that if anyone were to look into the box they'd see him.

“Listen, I know we all thought it was silly at first, but we know how much this means to you, I know how much this means to you. We'll find him alright? even if it's not right now, we'll find him, you don't have to worry. Just, just try and enjoy the rest of the concert, try and relax, if you're relaxed your memory might become more clear. Just for a few songs, if you still aren't feeling better you and I can walk out and get some fresh air okay? you said you met him outside last time, we'll look for him then” Yunho hand on Mingi's shoulder grounds him as he tries to blink away the tears, grateful for the dimming of studio lights as the concert will supposedly begin again.

He can hear the band walk back up the stage, the voice of the lead singer humming and a few giggles of the others ringing through the stadium. He can't see them, the lights are far too dark for that. “We've teased you a lot recently haven't we my petals?” The voice of the lead singer speaks for the first time that night, Mingi tilts his head in confusion at the feeling stirring in his chest, but it's blocked out by the screams of ‘yes’ from the crowd, the loudest being Hongjoong beside him.

“hmm, I'm pretty sure they've figured it out, our petals are smart” a female voice speaks from the stage, “yeah!” two other voices agree. “Very true, Soyeon” the crowd goes wild as a name is said, making Mingi remember that until now, it seems, everyone in this band has stayed anonymous. “Well, petals, I'm afraid I can no longer call only you mine.. you see, you've supported us through a lot, helped us in our search for our pink flower” he speaks again, Mingi faintly recalls Hongjoong giving everyone a run down on the bands lore, how the pink carnation is supposed to symbolize the happiest part of their life, their heaven.

“Even gave some of us ours” another voice says, “shut up Beomgyu” a female voice , different from the one identified as Soyeon speaks, the crowd loses it again as another member's name is revealed. “You're just jealous Petals love me more, Ryunjin” Beomgyu spits back, and this time Mingi is prepared for the eruption of screams that don't seem to end. “You two fight like an old married couple” the drummers, Mingi thinks, voice speaks. “SHUT UP CHANGBIN” the two shout in unison. The crowd is lively, all screaming newly learned names of the ones they love, next to Mingi Hongjoong is losing his mind as he buzzes in his seat waiting for his bias, the last name to be revealed.

“If I could continue my earlier sentence” the unnamed male speaks as the two youngest let out tiny huff’s of sorry’s, the crowd going dead silent as his unsaid way of asking for silence reaches them. “Tonight, as you could tell, we are sharing ourselves with you fully, and to do that, I wrote a song, it's quite different from what we usually give you, and for that I'm sorry. But as our story has gone on, and we've seen glimpses of all the incarnations pink flower” he takes a deep breath, “I believe I've found mine.. he's in the crowd tonight, so I hope he knows this songs for him” the last words are a bit shaky, and Mingi silently applauds the man for being brave enough to share this part of himself with his fans.

“Alright guys, don't go easy on him, you gotta tell him if you don't like his simpy song right?” Soyeon asks and the crowd gives a corus of agreement. “Here it is, Love talk, written by [Name] [Last name]” she screams, the crowd screaming with her as the lights turn on and the music starts. The air is sucked out of Mingi's chest, the name hitting him hard, the face he's met with afop the stage, staring down at him the moment the lights turned on, now dressed in much more revealing clothing, body littered with the tattoos Mingi recalls in his dreams? they hit him even harder.

It's not him who starts the song, but he's mouthing something to Mingi before he starts his own part, Mingi can't tell what it is he's saying. He can feel the eyes of his members on him, boring into him as they recognize the name and description, all probably equally as shocked as he is, but he can't tear his eyes away from the man atop the stage. The words he had said previously floating around in his head, the song was written for him, for Mingi.

Falling for a stranger (Yeah), good gracious (Yeah)

I might even fly out to Vegas (Catch a flight)

I'm thinking maybe you'd be down to do it (Yeah)

But you don't know what I'm saying (Saying)

[Name] moves his left hand that's not holding the mic, pointing his wrist in the direction of the crowd as the camera zooms in on what he's showing, a little pink flower, tattooed in the middle of his wrist, it's vine creeping up the palm of his hand and wrapping around his middle finger. He smiles at Mingi hopefully, and Mingi only smiles in turn.

“with MY bias, you fucking slept with MY bias I can't have ONE thing in this group YEARS I spent thirsting for this man and you got to him first!” Hong Jong wails, as he's being comforted by Seonghwa, the members being in a room backstage, they were brought here by the security guards after the concert had ended, being told “The incarnations want to see you.” and no further explanation.

Mingi's stomach is rumbling with nerves, now that he's not looking at [Name], that [Name] isn't looking at him he wonders if the other is mad, he paces back and forth in the room, blocking out Hongjoongs wails and Jongho and Yeosangs giggles. He knows the thought is irrational, the man had just done an identity reveal just so Mingi would recognize him, but there's still a nagging voice at the back of his brain.

“Still can't believe you slept with him, - like I can't believe he's [Name], like damn dude I get why you loved his fingers now.“ Yunho speaks from where he sits and eats some candy, his face between impressed and uninterested. Mingi wants to smother him. “Never really given my fingers much thought, I'm glad flower liked them” a deep voice speaks from the doorway, the now open doorway, the doorway that [Name] and the rest of his band are standing in.

The voices in the back of Mingi's head disappear and his body acts on instinct as he moves to [Name], the taller meeting him midway and their lips entwining in a passionate kiss. Mingi's hands steady themselves on [Name’s] shoulders, fearing his legs might give out beneath him if he doesn't, the guitarist has one hand, his left hand, on Mingi's cheek, the other gripping his hip like a lifeline.

When they break away, eyes locking and laughter bubbling from their throats, Mingi hears a whine behind them. “Goddamnt, now I owe Ryujin 20 bucks. You couldn't have waited 5 minutes?” Beomgyu grumbles as he plops himself on the first open chair he sees. “I'll give you forty if you stop placing bets on me” [Name] says as he spins Mingi around so they're both facing the rest of the people in the room. Mingi's back pressed against his chest so tight he can feel the other's beating heart, his waist encircled by [Name’s] arms as he rested his chin on Mingi's shoulder.

“Deal!” Beomgyu chirps from where he sits, “I swear you're all idiots, introduce yourselves” Soyeon gives her bandmates a pointed look and they all make ‘O’ faces in realization that they have yet to do that. “There's no need, Hongjoong-Hyung raves about-” San’s words are stopped shen Hongjoongs hand loudly slaps his mouth shut, looking at the band in a panic. “what he means to say is we heard on the stage, right?“ Hongjoong directs the last word threateningly at San, who nods his head fearfully with watery eyes. Hongjoong releases his hand from San’s mouth, the younger immediately backing away from Hongjoong and pouting as he looks at Wooyoung who is clearly much more interested in what's going on than San’s pain.

“ah, same here, [Name] won't shut up about you guys he's been a fan since like debut” Ryujins words are met with a loud cackle from Beomgyu about the fact that his friend just got outed, and a grumble from [Name who simply hides his face in Mingi's shoulder as the idol gives him a curious look.

“So I guess we're like… members in law” Changbin tries to joke, earning a loud laugh from Wooyoung, the sound immediately making him brighten up. “I'm gonna take Flower so me and him can talk someplace private” [Name] speaks before directing his attention to Ateez, “really it is nice meeting you all and it would be an honor to talk more, but flower is more important to me” he tells them as he drags Mingi out of the room, pausing for a moment to look back at Hongjoong, “for what it's worth Captain, you were my bias wrecker” he says with a cheeky grin before closing the door, Hongjoong sitting still for a moment before letting out a strangled cry that's muffled by the door.

“flower?“ is the first thing Mingi asks when he and [Name] enter a room alone. [Name] only nods, “mhm, do you not like it?” he looks at Mingi with a hint of nervousness Mingi hasn't seen on him before, it was kind of endearing. “NO! no no I mean Uhm I like it but it's just… I don't know, didn't think you would have remembered me, especially named me after something so important” Mingi mumbles.

“I know it may seem like a shocker but I do actually like you, I mean I didn't exactly learn korean for nothing” [Name] huffs out a puff of laughter, but his words hit Mingi, he learnt a language for Mingi. “I- I never called you” is all Mingi could reply with, [Name] only nods in response, “yeah.. “ he bites the inside of his cheek.

“It's not that I didn't want to- god I wanted to, it's just- I lost your number- well not lost more so as spill water-” Mingi starts to panic but is cut off by the feeling of [Name’s] lips connecting to his own once again. He's silenced, feeling the tallers hand rest on his neck to hold him in place. The kiss is broken as their foreheads are rested against one another. “My Flower, I could honestly care less” [Name] breathes out, “Whatever happened, you still decided to show up, and you have yet to reject me, so I could honestly care less on why you didn't contact me” He removes his head from Mingi's as he looks down at him. “I don't want to think about the year I spent without you when you're in my arms now” he says, and Mingi responds by kissing him again, a smile on his own lips.

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notes: chat this is not proofread and im sick so please lmk if you find any mistakes

copyright | 2024 | @asherthehimbo

[yarnzipangirl]

John's Narrative Importance: Narrative Reasons Why John Doe =/= KiY

So I've posted a couple of times about how I don't think John was the King in Yellow and a second potential for his identity, but all the stuff I listed was evidence and when it comes right down to it, this is a story. And it's a story that's utilizing a mythos that has a *million* different riffs on it being told as, essentially, a solo CoC campaign. By which I mean: DMs do what they want. 'Evidence' is about Watsonian reasoning. And Watsonian reasoning only matters so much.

Here's the Doylist side aka *why I think the story will be better if so*.

(spoilers up to De Capo)

The Dark World and Cosmology

As some have noted, the second that the Dark World became not just a dumping ground for things that cannot die but became The Afterlife, Endstop, you set up the problem of a cosmology that does not align with the lesson of the story.

'A life has meaning, even if it's short' does not align with 'and then you have all of that erased and your existence continues in Eldritch Turbohell where nothing matters, potentially indefinitely'. I'm not saying that the story has to end with Heaven Existing. But I am saying that if you're venerating surviving and living and existence, the Dark World is a direct antithesis to all of it. And you have to do something *about* that for the narrative to feel satisfying, especially when you've chosen to not just make it vague-upsetting-consequence-for-John but a whole world that we are now going to travel through and explore.

So not only do you have to Stop Kayne for the plot, you have to address the Dark World or straight up Arthur Is Wrong. He's, essentially, delusional and placating himself about his suffering instead of saying something meaningful and beautiful.

Which means that they have to change the cosmology somehow. They *do* have to change reality to be different, but instead of being whatever-the-fuck horrors Kayne wants, they have to inject the lessons of the story *into* the cosmology. They have to *reject* everything that is the Dark World and either make it so that there *is* no afterlife whatsoever (either oblivion or reincarnation or some secret third thing) or there is a 'better place' for the dead (either as a second option or just The New Version). Hope has to mean something. It has to have a payoff or it's just delusion.

And the most satisfying way, narratively, for this to happen is for John to do it. John, who's been learning about how important life is, how beautiful the world is, who's experienced things *with* Arthur, to be the hand that manages this. That Arthur's humanity informs the greater cosmology is narratively important, but it would be the most meaningful if done through the intensely personal love shared between him and John, the experiences formed through the narrative, the lessons that he struggled through and learned with him as they faced the uncaring multiverse and said 'fuck you' to it.

Arthur's Humanity

So obviously, we've got a lot of hints that whatever this 'letting go' is or this means of beating Kayne, it might be about Arthur. Arthur's got a weird scar. Arthur absorbed a piece of Lilith. Arthur's parents were cultists doing *something. Arthur is Lilith's favorite. So maybe Arthur is secretly someone?

But the difference between John and Arthur is that Arthur *has* a past. He has had a *life* where he made *choices* in the *world*. He has been a person for 34 years! Having Arthur suddenly secretly be X, go super saiyan and save the day, (aside from pretty much making everything with John unnecessary for the story) or even having John-and-Arthur combine like Voltron into something because Arthur is *special*... kind of takes away what has been Arthur's very important purpose both for himself *and* the story.

It makes staying alive something that was just going to happen because he's special. It makes all the things that he's lived through, his choices, how he feels about them, irrelevant to the conclusion of the story. Instead of letting his humanity and his thoughts and words and feelings and how they've shaped the relationship between the two of them, how they've helped John on his journey through becoming someone mean something... his contribution is some thing that he didn't choose and had no part in. And I hate that, narratively.

Arthur being human, Arthur being limited, Arthur being a fragile life washed this way and that by the eldritch forces around him and both surviving and making an impact *because of his humanity*, because of the person he is and the choices he's made and the love that he's shown is thematically satisfying in a way that Arthur being 'special' is not.

Agency and Self Determination

John has had the least agency of anyone in this narrative *at* all times. Bar none. Even Yorick had *knowledge* of things that John didn't, the means to travel, the means to communicate with various beings while John could only talk to Arthur.

And if this story isn't just about kicking John over and over again until he gives up, then this lack of agency should have a purpose in and of itself. This should be a lesson. The fact that John is both the one with the least agency and the one with the *most* empathy in most cases is *not* to be lost: it's right there in the first season, after all. When he had his *least* agency (Arthur was in a coma) was when he had nothing in the way to let him start thinking and feeling and considering other people most deeply. His identity was formed during that period of the least agency: he chose to be John *in that period*.

Even the one that most fans hold against him (Parker) as being entirely his agency? Nope. "John" as we know him, did not know how Parker died. And the Entity that killed Parker did so accidentally. Even if you will give John the blame for it since it was 'him', he told Parker to stay away and Parker didn't listen and he reacted. It wasn't deliberate and planned, or it certainly didn't sound that way. More importantly, it's no more his action than ep18 and 20, or everything that happened to Noel, can be 'blamed' on Yellow. Yes, same being, but the memory is completely gone. The John we know didn't know he was the King in Yellow for 12 episodes. The 'person' who did it (accident or not) is not the same.

Claiming to be Parker's murderer was cruel, but it wasn't a smug, knowing dig at Arthur even if John sold it that way. It was an angry proclamation from someone who felt incredibly guilty at the time over the Widow, lashing out to hurt both himself (putting distance between Arthur and himself when Arthur was already the most important to him) and Arthur (who decided to take that path while he was helpless to stop him) claiming an incident he legitimately didn't remember because that was also, clearly, his fault. It was him trying to claim agency in the *worst* way, trying to do *something* about what he felt was a terrible action, a first attempt.

So in a sense, this journey is John earning his agency after (ostensibly) abusing it. The narrative set up for this that we're told at the moment is being the King in Yellow, seeing people as insignificant, etc. etc. etc. But once you see the greater cosmology, the King in Yellow is *such* a small fish in this pond that that lesson loses a *lot* of oomph. Yellow's existence, the same experience being done to him despite the lack of extraordinary circumstances? Nah. It loses the kick *fast*.

And John has *also* had the least amount of self-determination in the series. No one tries to tell Arthur who he is (other than, like, the Butcher and Larson pulling standard villain monologue nonsense) whereas John has no known identity that he isn't in real-time forging for himself. He's *told* he's the King in Yellow. He's *told* he's a Great Old One. Yorick continually calls him 'My King' (though again, Theories on That). See *everything the Witch said* per how everyone has tried to shape John's identity. And even Arthur has overreached at times or dismissed him at times, not out of malice but in defense of his own sense of self and body and life. You have to do this, you have to do that, backed in a corner or trapped *constantly*. Even in a place where he is ostensibly strong enough to be the one hunting and killing and building Citadels of Bone (the Dark World), he's still under the gun.

But if you make him Azathoth, for instance, who created a multiverse that has the Dark World, that created a multiverse that is so unkind, that treated his son like a servant (Nyarlathotep), who had literally *all power over reality in every way shape and form*, was the one *shaping* it all, and you make him live through it from the view of one of those 'little people' who never mattered, whose suffering he literally sleeps through... or Nodens who simply sees people as a means to an end, manipulating them for his own desires and purposes from a position of great power...

That's *earning* your position. That's changing the whole world through changing the individual at the top. That's got IMPACT.

An Agency Aside: The Manager

...don't get me wrong. I *love* the Manager. Favorite new character, hands down. But the second you introduced a new reason why X has been possible and start hanging ways for the boys to succeed on being the Manager's Work, you again wave around the idea that John doesn't matter, his agency doesn't matter, his lessons don't matter.

Arthur is the mundane/human side, John is the supernatural side. When you add a second supernatural ally, and one who (given the timing and the situation) could be seen as a Deus Ex Machina, you're weakening John's place and importance in the narrative unless there is something that John can do that the Manager cannot do. And, re: the Above, the Manager is another Nyarlathotep. His position in the narrative has to match what he's 'earned': he's here to help our boys be in a position where *they* can handle the solution. He's not here to provide it. Otherwise our characters and their journey don't matter. He hasn't learned or changed, so he *isn't* going to change the universe. He isn't going to have that impact because *he* hasn't changed.

Villain vs Abuser

Kayne is Arthur's villain. It couldn't be plainer: he's threatened his daughter's life and happiness, killed his own daughter (and clearly didn't take care of her, given what happened re: Scratch), he threatens the world that Arthur lives in, and if Arthur's purpose is to survive, he's the direct counter to this.

But he is John's abuser, and that is a very different thing.

While he's fucked with Arthur, he's consistently pumped him up. Talked about how he's special. Looked into his life. Been *interested* in him. Even if it was a ploy or a game, it's not degrading. To Kayne, John has always been a joke, a bufoon, something to make cracks about, criticize, and belittle, a *tool* to get Arthur to do what he wants at best. For Arthur, he shows up at pivotal moments, but for John, he's happy to show up and mock him for a while as he eats Gardettos and pop off with nothing of significance accomplished. He might watch Arthur to see what he'll do, but for John? He knows. And John's suffering *was* his objective.

When Kayne made a deal with Arthur and John, Kayne appeared to Arthur and got nudged towards the deal over and over again, and in that deal he got to choose *whether John had his identity/memories intact or not* (wtf John's agency?) whereas John had to call out to Kayne. He had to beg. He had to do *additional things* just to get a deal. And when he got his deal, John had to convince Arthur to do things of his free will. Arthur's deal was a *trick* but in a way, that was a kind of kindness: it turns out he didn't actually act like a fucking asshole to his friend John, whom he loves. John? Absolutely did all of it. And he has to live with that betrayal to Arthur. The difference could not be more clear.

Kayne is Nyarlathotep. And *even before getting the stones*, Nyarlathotep is one of your biggest active powers in this setting. Their goal is to stop him, but stopping him doesn't address the way that Kayne has out and out abused John. You stop a villain. You recombine Azathoth or you hide a stone or use the lighter to set something on fire or a dozen other things. Stopping a villain is mechanical. Do the thing, stop the villain.

For an abuser, you have to take their power away or take their access to you away. You make it so they can *never hurt you again* and can't hurt the people you care about. And a shard of the King in Yellow can't do that. A shard of the King in Yellow can't retrieve Noel or look after Lilly if Kayne decides to murder her just like the buopoth that bore her name. There's nowhere John can avoid Kayne, no way he can protect anyone, and he's never going to be able to beat him or be safe from him or keep others safe from him. Not when Kayne can toss him back into the Dark World or kill anyone he wants and do that to those John cares about.

John and the Search for Self

And last but not least: John deserves to never have been the King in Yellow.

It is what the cultists in Leerie wanted. It is what the Witch wanted. It is what the King in Yellow wanted. It's what Kayne insists, with every nickname and jibe. Larson. The Elder Things. Yellow. It's what the universe *seems to be saying at every turn*. It's what's simple. It's what's easy. It's what makes 'sense'.

And yet, the series let John make *this* statement:

And that statement loses a *lot* of power, especially in some of the allegories that have been mentioned around John, if this is reforming oneself vs. self discovery. If this is something he had to do instead of being something that he found within, the truth, while figuring out what he wants and who he really is? That's a different thing.

And you know who says he wasn't? You know who said 'You're nothing like [him]?' Who denied it even as John was forced at literal gunpoint to claim that identity?

Noel. The first character to ask John 'what does it feel like'. To try and see him as a person and empathize with his situation. (I love Arthur, but can sometimes forget John has emotions and feelings and is Trapped In There Alone.) The character who knew the King the most. Noel told us, right then and there: No. That's not you. You might sound like it. You might think you were. It might be convenient as fuck for everyone else. But I know that ain't you.

And goddammit, Noel deserves to be right.

John Doe is the name of someone who does not know their own identity. It is someone who is unknown. It's the perfect name for someone who's journey is about self discovery but also about finding out who they actually are so that the *world* can know too. But it's not a destination. It's still a name and identity that is about how *other people perceive them*: it has no source, no roots, nothing that identifies them as *anything* and part of self-discovery and self-determination is an identity entirely your own. It's a tool. Lilly gave it to him, like it's given to any John Doe, to have something to use while he was finding himself.

Narratively. And for me, as a die hard John Doe lover...

John needs to find his *own* name. John needs to discover his own identity, the *right* identity. And he is still John Doe because he hasn't *found* it. And when he does? If this narrative is going to fulfill the hopeful 'fuck you' tone that it has held throughout? That discovery needs to change everything.

That's how you finish a story.

[thecarnivorousmuffinmeta]

Now that there's an animated adaptation of Midnight Sun coming, and given the industry's recent track record (see: Minecraft Movie), what's the worst, bad faith, cash grab adaptation idea you can imagine? I figure if we inoculate ourselves then the reality won't suck so much.

My nightmare: Streaming has a long history of making shitty attempts at "adult animation", so we'll get an Edward who constantly cusses and does lewd jokes. It'll be like the HBO adult animated Velma (Scooby Doo) show where the writers' disdain for the characters fills every scene. The first episode will focus on how Carlisle helps plan a murder of some overly suspicious deputy so they can keep living in Forks.

Anyways, worst case theories? So we can feel better when it's not THAT bad? Or else use the apollo prophecy meme on your post a year or two from now.

My 'realistic' prediction

Twilight: The Edgy Animated Adult Series with Twelve Times More Drugs and Swearing

Oh man, yours is worse than mine. I mean this guessing the future business is a little silly in general, but I think that wouldn't happen as Twilight's not...

How do I put this?

Scooby Doo is a beloved, vintage, IP that's so well-known it's a part of American culture/Americana. It's in that weird place where it's acceptable to do edgy reboots of it because everyone already knows the premise of the Scooby gang, each individual character, the bad guys, and their mysteries.

You don't have to explain who any of the characters are supposed to be, so you get a "ah ha ha ha isn't it funny that Velma swears now?" because you know she's from a 1960's cartoon.

Twilight's not quite old enough for that and, at least in my opinion, not pervasive enough for that. It was a huge sensation, but was never as big as HP, and dominated only a subset of the YA audience (female-targeted YA romance). Ask a person off the street and the most they can probably, maybe, tell you is "sparkly vampires and Team Edward and Team Jacob". So, at best you get riffs like we saw when Twilight came out with the Simpsons and various other parodies where the parodies... really didn't know what to do with the characters or what it was even about. "Milhouse turns into a poodle, I guess? Is that funny? It's funny, right?"

Twilight just isn't old enough and as big as it was, I don't think was widespread enough.

So, I think we're going to get an earnest reboot.

But you do now have me concerned. And I may be eating my words later on this post and reblogging with a clown face.

Other Theories

Alright, let's see what we've got/what we can come up with:

Yours: HBO adult comedy horror fest

Mine: Boring, Snoozeville, Tame, Generically Arted Palatable Twilight that is Designed to Be as Appealing as Possible

Other options I can think of are...

Interview with a Vampirepalooza/Oh God I Don't Know What's Popular: given the recent success of Interview with a Vampire, an edgier adult story with adult characters, Netflix will look to make Twilight their exact own version of that. Except they won't understand what made it work there. We sexy it up but in a CW way, the kids are all still in high school but the fact that the Cullens are fucking each other is brought up relentlessly in an edgy way. The vampires all look hot, hot, hot but in a normal human way where you're not terrified they're some crystal robot out to eat your limbs. We'll keep some of the artsy weird dialogue, but Edward will be both somehow made more sympathetic (as he is the lead we end up with) and 'dark' where he's dangerous in a sexy way and not in a "you smell like my personal heroin way".

The Buffy Route: remember that one teen show from the 90's that was so good it spun off an entire genre of television that essentially hadn't existed before? Twilight becomes a fun teen oriented show where the characters say witty, fun, teenage-like things and get into episodic mysteries while somehow trying to remain in the realm of Twilight. Edward loses his edge, Bella loses her unrelatable nature, and we really play up every time a character has a funny line and write a lot more in there. Unfortunately, it's not a well written teen comedy show and so the lines are just generally bad and the plot never seems to go anywhere and it's just boring.

Hannibal the Twilight: some really artsy director gets involved and we now have a show where the symbolism of Edward walking around as a man-deer takes over the entire fucking thing. Nothing ever happens, Edward just shows up in Bella's dreams as a snarling man deer. When characters talk to each other, it's in artsy nonsense dialogue where it feels like both are reading 2000's era chatbot scripts to one another as they mix metaphors about ponies, china pottery, and dust motes. The plot is so non-existant the only important episodes to watch in a season are the premier and finale, except even then it's unclear what happened.

Audience Input

Anyone else got any wild guesses here?

[m1ssunderstanding]

Get Back Rewatch 55 Years On: Day 22

@javelinbk I’ve got another one for your “Paul McCartney doesn’t touch other men” compilation.

They’re really just going to keep goofing off with each other until the bitter end, aren’t they?

Who is this?? She’s gorgeous and I’m obsessed with her eye makeup.

I wonder if there’s a *reason* John broke randomly into “Run for your Life”. I’d actually feel better about that song if it was secretly about Paul, though I'd never considered it.

That face!

I’d actually love to know what Ringo and Billy were talking about that prompted that hug, though! I’m sure it must’ve been just so cute!

John saying “Okay Jim” to Paul. Reminds me  of that quarrymen story where John called Paul that. Such an awkward nick-name, considering John hated Jim. Like I know Paul’s first name is James and all, but it’s just weird. I wonder if he called him that often and why and how Paul felt about it.

It’s physically impossible for two people to actually love each other that much and break up. I just. It’s not real. I can’t process it. 

The fact that Paul wore a suit again, though, and plays standing. An example of Paul doing what makes him feel good whether it’s cool or not. He feels professional and put together in a suit and standing for the “performance” of these softer songs, so that’s what he’s going to do. I guess Ringo’s in a suit too, and tie. I just didn’t catch it at first because his tie and shirt are such a fun purple. 

John focused on Paul for the entire song of “Two of Us” and Paul very purposely avoiding eye-contact. It’s like a much less painful, but still awful, reverse version of the strawberry fields moment. 

The silly fake German. Paul’s “Ein Schwein, fille naught rhine.” Reminds me of John’s “Un. Du. Ein schwein hickle pickle” in front of “I Don’t Wanna Face It” which also used a very similar riff to “coming up”. IDK they’re just always talking. Always logging away every little eyelash flutter. Every meaningless thing means something with John and Paul. I know. I realize I’m fully certifiable. 

“Are we supposed to giggle in the solo?” “Yeah.” 

Paul’s just purposely ruined what’s probably like the five-hundredth take of Let it Be with his drunk uncle voice, and this is George. No matter how much he might want to stay annoyed at them, he never can. 

I wonder when exactly John goes from “I think that was rather grand. I’d take one home with me.” on Let it Be to, “Yeah, he was just trying to write another bridge over troubled water. Could’ve been Wings.” When exactly did the meaning (dead mom says not to fight for your relationships) sink in that made him hate the song?

I love that we end on Paul saying, “we’ll do one more.” I love that there’s never a tied-up, clean-cut ending for the Beatles. There’s always a “Her Majesty” tacked on after “The End” to leave room to continue on. 

[ackermansundercut]

Swing Dancin'

Summary: She was lucky enough to have a regular gig as a singer at a club in Brooklyn, and he was simply the beautiful soldier she had stolen a drink from. 

Word Count: 3K

Warnings: 1940’s James Buchanan Barnes is a warning, fluff, no angst, implications of smut but not explicit, my first fic in like 5 years please be gentle with me (If you remember this fic from my bucky account I had in 2018 ily and this is the much better, edited version)

Amber lighting illuminated swirling dresses and sparkling crystal glass, the smell of cigar smoke floating through breezes of laughter spilling from the dance floor and the bar. This was her environment, the comfort she thrived in. Women in dresses and skirts that tickled their legs as they were twirled by men in uniform, enjoying normalcy for as long as possible before loading up and shipping off to fight in the war. Y/N got to observe this environment every Friday night. Sometimes, if she let out a saccharine giggle and held back her vomit when the club manager Louis touched her ass and made sleazy remarks, Saturdays too.

Minutes before her set, Y/N was reapplying her cherry red lipstick to her lips, half listening to the soldier holding her compact for her as he chattered on about something or the other. Maybe complimenting the deep blue of her dress, or the way it plunged just a little more than all of the other girls’ in the room, or her beautiful hair done up in curls. Nothing significant enough for Y/N to pay attention to, and certainly nothing that she hadn’t heard before. The man was less than charming and bordering on leery, and it looked as if he didn’t brush his teeth. Y/N  got to her feet gracefully, the click of her heels muted in the noise. She shot the soldier a small smirk of a smile, lightly plucking her compact from his fingers and snapping it shut, slipping it into her clutch. 

“Thanks darlin’,” y/n hummed ever so sweetly. She left the soldier slack jawed with an absentminded pat on his cheek and turned her gaze towards the stage, shooting a smile at the band who were finishing up with a fun bit of a jazz jive.

 Sammy, the bassist, got the attention of the rest of the band and nodded at them, giving them the cue to wrap up the last few riffs so he could announce the woman just as he had every week for the past two months, since she had moved back to Brooklyn and secured this gig. With a final crescendo of the brass, the band was done, and Sammy was at the mic with a charismatic smile. 

“Now, now, now, listen up y’all. I’m glad we’re all havin’ a good time, and it’s about to get a whole lot better! ‘Cause we got one of the best singin’ dames in Brooklyn back tonight!” Sammy shouted the last few words enthusiastically, and there was a chorus of drunken and sober shouts of approval alike accompanied by raucous applause. Y/N rolled her eyes, her smile still adorning her lips and a light flush visible high on her cheekbones. She absentmindedly patted her hair, smoothing her dress once more. In the split second before she was meant to take the stage, movement beside her shoulder caught her attention. With a quick glance to her right, Y/N  snatched a glass of amber alcohol out of the oblivious soldier's hand and downed it in one go, the burn welcome in her throat. The man, once he had worked through a moment of shock at what exactly just happened, protested, but when she turned her gaze to him and his greyish blue eyes met her beautiful, enthralling ones, his voice caught in his throat. She dropped her mascara coated eyelashes into a demure wink at the admittedly handsome man, a smile on her cherry lips. 

“Thanks for the drink, soldier,” she said sweetly, sparing him one last glance before swanning up the steps to the stage. Her lips curled back in place as she flashed a brilliant smile to Sammy, who handed her the microphone and tipped his hat before moving back to stand beside his bass. She glanced out at the audience, smatterings of applause meeting her in any direction she shifted her gaze. 

She recognized a few faces, regulars of this particular club. Others were new. She noticed the soldier she had used as a mirror holder, and the soldier she had stolen the drink from. She had seen him a few times before, and who could forget those eyes? She also recognized a few other faces, a man with whom she had slept with once or twice because he said he drove fast, and she liked feeling alive. A girl who she had saved from a creep, and a few simply damn good swing dancers who made their impression on the singer. The new ones were always the most interesting, though, because she tried to guess who she would see next week, and who, on the off chance, would tip her for her singing. 

“Well, aren’t you all just a sweet crowd,” she hummed into the microphone, shooting a dazzling  smile at the audience as she adjusted it to her height, garnering her some whistles and shouts of the positive sort, making her smile internally to match the one playing on her lips. Good crowd tonight. “I believe our lovely Sammy over there did a mighty fine job of introducing me, so I might as well go ahead and start singing,” she let out a peal of laughter that was as enthralling as the notes that slid past her cherry lips as she sang. She had one hand on the mic stand, the other delicately placed on the mic itself as she started her first song of the night, a fast jazzy crowd-pleaser about a little bit of love on a hot summer night in Hollywood. She moved her hips as she sang, a smirk or a grin adorning her lips throughout the entirety of her set. She loved watching the crowd dance as she sang, though she couldn’t help the way her eyes strayed to where a specific soldier was dancing with a beautiful girl, though his eyes weren’t on his date. Every single time Y/N unwittingly allowed her gaze to drift to that section of the floor, his eyes were on hers as she moved her hips and sang her pretty little heart out in that sultry, swing voice of hers. Through every song, the slow and the fast, she met his eyes at least once. At one point, during her third or fourth song, he went to the bar and perched himself next to a skinny blonde boy, but never took his eyes off of the woman commanding the attention of the room from the small stage.

Y/N finished her set after her second extra song, pushing the time limit that Louis had set for her, laughter bubbling past her lips as she caught a rose thrown from somewhere in the crowd. She quirked an eyebrow and grinned, facetiously placing it between her teeth and turning to Sammy with an exaggerated curtsy, who without hesitation swung the woman around in just enough dance to give the audience a good laugh. 

“I thank you all kindly, you’ve been more than darling. Now, back to the band!” Y/N called out into the microphone before winking at the crowd and descending the few steps to the floor level. As per usual, there were a few people at the base of the stairs telling her she did well, and a few bold men doing their best to take her home with them tonight. She graciously accepted the praise, kissing a few cheeks and reminding everyone she’d be here next week as well. And as soon as she could, she slipped back to the bar, weaving between dancing couples until she was leaning against the hardwood. 

“Hey baby, give me something strong,” she called to the bartender, who flashed her a smile and nodded, reaching for the bourbon as he responded. 

“Amazing as always, y/n!” 

He was just handing her the glass, the cool surface barely skimming her fingertips before it was stolen out of her hand and downed by none other than the soldier she had stolen a drink from at the beginning of the night. She couldn’t help the abrupt laugh that escaped her throat, an eyebrow raised as she raised a hand at the bartender for another drink . 

“I suppose we’re even now, aren’t we soldier?” 

“I suppose we are, doll,” he said sweetly and leaned against the bar beside her, a crooked smile on his lips. She took a moment to study his face. He was handsome, sure, but it was the easy nature of his smile and the light of life in his stormy ocean eyes that drew her in. He had his hat sitting cocked on his head, and the way his uniform fit perfectly across his broad shoulders made something flutter in her lower stomach. She grabbed her drink from the bartender with a grin of thanks and took a small sip as she examined the man in front of her.

“What did you think of the show…?” She trailed off, opening the door for him to offer his name. 

“Sergeant James Buchanan Barnes, ma’am,” he shot her another smirk, tipping his hat, “at your service. I think I truly did see one of the most beautiful, best singin’ dames in this country,” James said. There was a light blush threatening to creep up Y/N’s cheeks, but she tilted her chin down for a moment to attempt to keep it at bay. She fluttered her eyelashes a bit, pulling her painted lower lip between her teeth. She hummed thoughtfully for only a few moments before her fingertips were seizing the rim of her glass, and she was downing her entire drink, setting the glass back on the table. James was looking at her with an open expression of amusement and curiosity, and she felt the corners of her lips curling into a genuine smile subconsciously. 

“I think you want to ask me to dance, Sergeant,” Y/N stated, her eyebrow raised and mirth dancing in her eyes. James Buchanan Barnes mirrored her expression, nodding after a millisecond of thought with a chuckle and offering his hand. 

“Well then, doll, it would be my pleasure if you accompanied me in a dance,” James said. Y/N didn’t respond with words, only settling her hand in the larger, rougher one of James Barnes, allowing him to pull her into the center of the dance floor. He swung her around for more than just one dance, spinning her from left to right and lifting her off the floor into his arms, and then back to the ground to twirl some more. He left her breathless, both from the dancing and his charm. It was as if the expression of joy was glued to y/n’s face, laughter spilling past her lips with each dip and turn. James Buchanan Barnes knew how to dance. Y/N was no stranger to dancing with, well, strangers, but she had never felt so at ease with anyone else. James had an aura to him, a warmth that radiated and filled her chest with more than a few butterflies.

Soon enough, the boys on stage slowed the pace to a smoother, crooning song, and Y/N found herself pressed close to James’ chest. His cologne clouded any sort of thought in her mind, and she couldn’t help but reach up with a delicate hand to rest on his clean shaven jaw. His hand that wasn’t preoccupied on her waist mirrored her touch, sliding up her shoulder to cup the back of her neck. Y/N felt her breath catch between her parted lips as James’ smirk melted into something sweeter, and an irresistible magnetic pull drew their lips together. The moment their lips met, what began as a sweet, soft, first kiss dissolved into one with more heat, more want, more everything and it felt as if every nerve that ran through Y/N’s body had gained a static charge. The noise of the band and the din of the people surrounding the pair dimmed in comparison to the blood rushing through Y/N’s ears, and she went as long as her singer lungs would allow before the burning need for oxygen forced her to pull away from the sergeant's lips. His chest was rising and falling rapidly, and he had a boyish grin on his lips when he caught her gaze.

“You wanna get out of here, sweetheart?” James murmured, his voice only audible to her. She nodded, a clever smirk back on her red lips as she looked up at the soldier through her eyelashes. 

“C’mon, let’s go to my place,” she said. And they went, James waving to his friend that Y/N had seen him sitting with earlier, and Y/N stopping for a moment to collect her tips from the night. Once outside of the club, James had Y/N pressed against the wall outside of the club for another kiss, his lips cascading down the column of her throat and causing a whine or two to escape Y/N. She interrupted him when a cab finally paid attention to her halfhearted hailing, and she lightly shoved at James’ chest to get his attention and get him into the car before the impatient driver left without them. Y/N managed to give the cabbie her address, a small apartment above a family owned grocery store, before James’ insatiable lips were back on hers. 

The pair shared countless kisses in the back of the car, their hands becoming more daring with each minute of the short ride. It wasn’t long before the car stopped and the annoyed cabbie grumbled something or another at the couple, so she tossed a bit of cash over the seat to the driver and grabbed James’ hand, pulling him up the stairs and fumbling with the lock, giggling when James kissed her neck impatiently from behind her. When she finally got the old door open and had taken only a step inside her apartment, James closed the door with his foot and had his hands on her waist as if they belonged nowhere else. He had her spun around and pressed to the door before she even got a chance to catch her breath, and he took a moment to appreciate the dazed look in her eyes. Y/N was less than patient, however, and reached up to tug his face down to hers. She swallowed his chuckles with open mouthed kisses, and his hands roamed the expanse of her back and waist. Her hands fingertips tugged at the ends of the short hair at the nape of his next, and he let out a low, deep groan and moved his lips to the beautiful woman’s neck, then her collarbone, and she responded eagerly, a needy whimper sounding as pretty as her singing graced James’ ears. The soldier groaned lowly at the beautiful noise, and before she knew it, his hands moved again. They were beneath the plush of her thighs, lifting her up. She quickly wrapped her legs around his waist with a quiet giggle, a sweet little noise that had James grinning. He turned and with only a few strides, her apartment was quite small, she was on the bed as he hovered over top of her, running his fingers through her beautiful hair. His dog tags slipped from where they were tucked into his collar, and Y/N had to fight the urge to grab them with her teeth and tug his face right back down to hers. Everything about her was beautiful, and he hungrily took in every detail of her features with ravenous eyes. Her lips were swollen and her lipstick was a bit smeared, her hair slightly tousled. He had left a couple hickies on her neck, and he failed to suppress a grin at the sight. She didn’t fail to notice his beauty, either, and she sent him an alluring smile fit for a vixen. 

“I suggest,” Y/N began, one of her hands ghosting up the sergeant's front, “you start taking my clothes off now, Sarge,” she murmured in her breathy, nothing short of sexy voice that had James’s blood flow change direction. He groaned and seized forward to steal another kiss from her before pulling back and tugging lightly at the strap of her dress. 

“Yes, ma’am,” his deep voice rattled her to her core, and she grinned. There was a flurry of clothing hitting the floor in a haphazard pile, and Y/N had a fleeting thought that she had never been happier that she didn’t have neighbors. 

Y/N woke to golden sunlight dancing across her eyelids and warming the bare skin of her back, a heavy arm draped across her waist tickled her side as fingertips traced invisible shapes onto her skin. She forced her eyelids apart despite the lull of peace in the quiet morning drawing her back to sleep, the corners of her lips tilting into a blissful, surprised smile when she met the gaze of the man sharing her bed. 

“Well, Sergeant, didn’t quite expect you to stay the night,” she murmured sleepily, leaning up slightly to press a kiss to James’s lips. It wasn’t something she did often, allowing men to stay the night, let alone greeting them in the morning. He was just different. He sent the dame a grin, tucking a strand of her hair behind her ear, the gentle motion sending a shiver up her spine. This wasn’t very common for him either, staying the night and into the morning. She was just different.

“What, and leave the most beautiful dame in Brooklyn to wake up alone?” James hummed, shaking his head with a soft smile. 

“What a gentleman,” Y/N teased with a laugh, propping her head up with her hand, meeting James’s captivating gaze. She tugged the sheet up slightly, allowing her a bit more modesty under his thoughtful eyes. He was staring at her as if he was a man with a million questions, and she held the secrets to the universe. It was a good few beats of silence before he spoke, his fingers never ceasing their sweeping motions on her waist as he contemplated his words. 

“You know, doll, I’ve still got a week before I ship out, and I want to get to know you better, if that’s alright with you,” he stated, and Y/N could’ve sworn she saw the tips of his ears turn a Typically, on the off chance she allowed a man to stay overnight in her bed, the second they began to imply that they wanted to see her again, she cut them off with a sweet kiss and a push out the door. Instead, she silenced the little voice in her head, and she found herself pulling her lower lip between her teeth, barely concealing an elated smile. 

“It’s more than alright with me. If we only have a week, I do believe we better make the most of our time together, then. Why don’t we start by going for breakfast, Sergeant Barnes?” She suggested, cursing the girlish butterflies in her stomach. He let out a laugh, almost sounding relieved, and James Buchanan Barnes found himself nodding his head and cupping her cheek with one of his hands, tracing the outline of her lips with his thumb. 

“I think that’s a fine idea, sweetheart. And you can call me Bucky.”

A/N I'm so happy to be writing again, even this is just an updated, edited version of one of my favorite fics from my old blog!!

[tiggymalvern]

Burn Noticed 5x03 Mind Games

And now we're back to business as usual. It was a big relief going into this podcast episode knowing the podcasters were going to enjoy it. I had to brace myself for the last one, knowing they'd hate an episode that I love.

The podcasters start off getting sidetracked by the idea of a Hallowe’en Burn Notice episode with a spooky masked villain, in which Michael is NOT into it at all, Jesse is weirdly superstitious and Sam and Fi are having crazy amounts of fun. (That would actually be very silly but very entertaining 🤣🤣)

Bri: I really enjoyed this episode.

Chris: This episode was wholesome as fuck. If I had a criticism of this episode, it might be that it’s a little too wholesome, a little too cute, but that’s okay because I like it.

Chris: Often times when I’m watching a BN episode, I’ll think ‘it would be good if this thing happens’ and it never happens. But this episode does that. I remember watching this scene and thinking, ‘Maybe this is just some dude and Michael’s paranoid’ and then it was.

Bri: Had they actually gone through with, 'yeah, you just gotta fucking move on, dude,' this is exactly the kind of thing that I'm looking for. Michael having to rebuild from the high conspiracy lifestyle of an international spy to just a guy who helps people. He definitely has PTSD and this is an interesting tension, another reason why this episode is so interesting and good, because for a brief moment this show was about something other than his fucking Burn Notice.

Chris: Michael wanting to know about his Burn Notice and caring about the mythology is bad, and Fi often tells him that it's bad, but the show never quite agrees with her.

(Fi is of course right. Michael should listen to Fi and Sam a lot more then he does!)

Bri: Then we see our three pals having lunch together, and this is something that happens throughout the episode - they're just hanging out. It's not to talk about a case or anything, and it's so cute. Sometimes they just get lunch because they like each other.

Chris: Do they have any other friends?

Bri: I don't think so. Well, Sam has friends.

(I've said this before and I'll say it again. I'm not sure how many friends Sam actually has. He has a lot of pals, people he'd be perfectly happy to grab lunch and while away a few hours with, people he can ask for information and know they'll give it to him, but they're not people he trusts the way Michael and Fiona and Jesse are. That's a very different level.)

On Elsa calling Sam 'boy toy':

Bri: There's a shot of Fiona and Michael both looking so upset at hearing that, which I also really liked.

Chris: I missed this Sam Axe. They've decided their version of a womanising guy is a guy who just wants to be a kept man.

Bri: It's so funny!

Chris: Sam is not a sugar daddy, he's a sugar baby.

Bri: And he fucking loves it, he loves when he has rich ladies to just spoil him rotten. And he's not a philanderer either. He's a serial monogamist.

Chris: Sam Axe gets pegged, right? (He absolutely does 🤣🤣🤣)

On the client of the week :

Bri: It's a fro-yo shop! It's so good - Michael Horowitz knows what I'm looking for out of Burn Notice and it's this exactly. (It was a cute little riff, the whole 'I can pay you in yoghurt' thing.)

Chris: Michael Westen only kind of wants to fuck his girlfriend, but he loves yoghurt! (There is some truth in that LOL. It's always Fi coming onto Michael and almost never the other way round 🤪)

Fi and Michael are joking about how bad Michael looks wearing Nate's shirt.

Bri: It's very sweet. They're so domestic blissing out and I am obsessed with it. They just look like they have fun together. Michael has never had this much personality in an episode, possibly ever.

Chris: But here's the thing - Michael Westen has no room to talk. This is a man who has never dressed well. He looks better in a Nate shirt than in his regular shit.

Bri: Because at least there's something going on.

Chris: It's not just beige on beige. 😁

The podcasters love Michael's Trey alias.

Bri: He says a lot of idioms but he gets them just a little bit wrong and it's hilarious. Only Michael Horowitz could have pulled this off and he fucking did it. I could not tell you how hard I laughed - not just that he got the idioms wrong, but that he's so steadfast that he was right.

(This episode is full of delightful little moments. They reference the back and forth between Michael and Nate in the car when Michael's still wearing Nate's shirt, among others.)

Michael is obsessed with his Burn Notice files.

Chris: It's a character plot. It's just a character plot, and that's not a thing we do on this show. This is what I want from procedural television.

Bri: I would argue that most procedurals have more freedom to do it, because most don't have two separate cases going on at once. Burn Notice has uniquely set itself up for failure when there's usually the macro plot that's entirely detached from the case of the week. They could have had their cake and eat it, but they're bad at thematic alignment and they didn't really do a good job of integrating the two plot-lines.

Chris: This is from the period of time when basic cable was trying to figure out how to do serial plot-lines.

Bri: It really is that transitionary period between tried and true fully procedural to 'what if everything was 'to be continued?'

Chris: It feels like an interesting experiment.

Bri: I wonder if that's why the later seasons are so much stronger, which is not always the case. Procedurals have the opposite problem where usually they get less strong the further in they get because they've exhausted so many of their ideas. I feel like Burn Notice has the opposite, because they're learning serialisation.

(I mostly agree here? I always loved the juxtaposition of the arc storyline and the case of the week from the start, but there are definitely times when the arc plot bookends feel tagged on and disconnected. I don't think it clashes as often as Bri seems to think it does, but the later seasons had some strengths that the earlier ones didn't, for sure.)

They question Jesse's lack of involvement in the plot for several weeks in a row. 26 minutes into this episode, Jesse finally appears! With the excuse that he's doing this on his lunch break so he can't be around for long.

Chris: Was he filming something else? (It's a question I've vaguely wondered about, but never investigated imdb and dug into).

Chris: It's fun to watch both Jesse and Michael play beta male roles.

Bri: I believe it more from Michael just because he's less physically imposing.

Chris: I think Jesse sells it. He's Clark Kent-ing here. (He really is. I love seeing Jesse/Coby Bell play nerd types, he's so fun and really makes it work.)

Michael frames the undercover Fed as an undercover cop and then has to help him out.

Bri: Michael's like, 'Hey, I'm also undercover, I'm sorry about this.'

Chris: I don't think he apologises.

Bri: No, I'm apologising for him. Nobody ever apologises in Burn Notice, nor do they ever say thank you. People just give each other meaningful looks and you're supposed to interpret.

Chris: Because they're men. This is what men do.

Bri: Fiona does it too!

(There is a lot of emotional reservation in this show, but honestly that's not surprising given all of their backgrounds. And they all understand each other so well that meaningful looks are often their best form of communication ❤️)

Bri: Everything about this episode is good. This an A+ Burn Notice episode.

Yet it doesn't get called a great episode of Burn Notice on their objective criteria, because of a dearth of good spy tips and tiny roles for both Jesse and Madeline. It does, however, got to be a great episode of television, because obviously! ❤️

[whirligig-girl]

The S282 from the train sim game Derail Valley, interpreted as a prop built in the first two or three seasons of Thomas the Tank Engine & Friends.

I tried to imagine how a prop builder would actually put something like this together on a children's TV series budget. Like the other original props, this one uses kitbashed parts from Marklin model trains as well as plastic card bodies and sculpted faces. The chassis is taken from a Marklin BR55 0-8-0 and the pilot and trailing wheels, and cylinders, modified from a Marklin BR78.

There are some design changes to make it just look more Thomas, like the thomas style headlamp, the flat prominent buffer beam, and the blocky red-sided footplate. The geometry has been simplified as it needed to be made out of folded, bent, and cut plastic card.

More details and alternate versions under the cut:

The actual locomotive as it appears in Derail Valley: Simulator. Note the much larger cylinders. They could have built more proportional cylinders--they did so when they built Murdoch in season 7, but I wanted it to fit in better with Henry and Gordon.

The valve gear shown is accurate to the BR55, not to the BR78 Gordon and Henry use nor the game model (which has much thicker rods)

Other details, like the air pump (not needed on sodor, which seems to use vacuum brakes), bell, and dynamo (again, not used on sodor) have been removed. The ladder detail on the running board has been simplified. A cowcatcher is not needed, but i kept it as more or less the only obviously foreign feature of the engine. The electric headlamp on the top of the S282's smokebox has been replaced with a white

The S282's tender is a four wheel tender on a pair of freight car trucks. The thomas version is a six wheel tender based on Gordon and Henry's.

The livery was changed to make it feel more Sodor. The sides of the running board were painted red, and red lining was added to the boiler bands, cab, and tender. And 282 was given as a number on the tender, in red-lined yellow text. The wheels retain the red paint of the model that contributed their wheels, but dulled a bit by weathering. The game model has black wheels with white walls and red counterweights, but that didn't look right with the small counterweights on most of the wheels and the one single large counterweight on the number three axle.

With so many red accents, the loco bears more than a passing resemblance to Hiro from the cgi series, though this is only a coincidence.

Here's a variant with a game-accurate livery. No striping, and the wheel spokes are black with white walls and red counterweights.

Here are squeaky clean versions of both liveries.

and here are NWR green, blue, and red variants. I actually made a texture pack for the previous major version of Derail Valley, before they updated the model and the UV maps changed. (obviously my texture pack did not go so far as to add faces)

Final variant, the ES&DT version. [sniff sniff] can you hear a guitar riff slowly building tempo?

[rottenpumpkin13]

what would it be like if the firsts lived together?

They did live together. Once. Right after Angeal and Genesis made First Class, SOLDIER grew in numbers, and the living quarters were still under planning and construction. They shared a spacious three bed, three bathroom apartment later reserved for Thirds to share. Angeal still dubs it "the worst 14 months of his life"

• Genesis had his own cereal, but thought theft tasted better, so he used to steal Sephiroth's cereal and the two would have a physical altercation over rainbow loops.

• Angeal thought Genesis was a neat freak until he met Sephiroth, who made a color-coded spreadsheet to track the frequency of dusting different areas of the house. Sephiroth liked to passive-aggresively wipe down counters after someone had been in the kitchen, and took pictures of Angeal and Genesis as they were actively making messes to hold them accountable later. Apparently Sephiroth still has a scrapbook of photos to this day, which he labeled "Why I live alone."

• Angeal was the type to leave out a dirty mug Genesis used and never washed for days on end, refusing to let Sephiroth wash it, all to prove a point. Sephiroth would cave and wash the dirty mug when she wasn't looking. Genesis knew this, which is why he would continue to use the mug and leave it out. The same mug remained in the sink for all 14 months they lived together.

• Sephiroth is an insomniac and liked to fix himself meals at 3AM, which would give Genesis a green light to practice the fucking flute, also at 3AM. Angeal had never experienced true rage until he heard a half-assed flute version of O Fortuna while Sephiroth was actively beating a stake with a meat hammer.

• Angeal would refuse to cook for them as a protest if he found half-eaten food in the garbage.

• Angeal was also no saint, and his alarm used to be a loud guitar riff meant to get him motivated and out of bed in the morning. The first time Sephiroth was startled awake by loud rock music at 5AM, he thought it was Genesis. So he threw open Genesis' door and attacked him.

• Sephiroth had the tendency to leave all the lights on, even in rooms he wasn't in. This drove Genesis and Angeal insane, and they berated him so much for it that Sephiroth started to walk around the apartment with a jumbo flashlight. He would flash it directly in their faces when talking to them because he's petty.

• Angeal had a tendency to bring over any strange item or piece of furniture he found at yard sales or on the side of the road. Angeal couldn't understand how Sephiroth thought the giant, stained beanbag chair shaped like an eye he got at a yard sale for 3 gil was junk. He also couldn't comprehend why Genesis didn't want the antique vanity Angeal got for free at the flea market because the owner thought it was haunted.

• Everyone had different scent preferences and refused to compromise. This is why the apartment smelled like Banora White Apple candles, Ocean Mist, and Tropical Berry simultaneously. It smelled like ass.

• Sephiroth enjoys his peace, but couldn't meditate when Angeal was screaming at the baseball game on TV while Genesis was using a karaoke machine to recite Loveless. His Root Chakra is still damaged to this day.

• Sephiroth had to find out the hard way what a tie on a closed door meant, and that not all screams mean someone is in danger.

• Genesis had a phase where he would bring over random people from his nights out. The amount of breakfasts Sephiroth had with half-dressed women and men singlehandedly developed his conversational skills.

• Angeal used to have this mentality of "I'm the responsible one, which means I can take things without asking." He took Sephiroth's hair brush without asking once and forgot to put it back. Sephiroth retaliated by bending Angeal's favorite stainless steel pan. Genesis had to separate them, an exhilarating experience he never wants to go through again because the pan and the hairbrush were used as weapons.

• Genesis couldn't understand why Sephiroth and Angeal didn't want his "artistic french films" playing while they were in the room. Angeal's argument was "If I wanted to see balls while I'm cooking dinner, I would make this lasagna in the locker room at SOLDIER."

[fmajorenthusiast]

POST THE COLLAB, KATIE

AHAAHAHAHAH YESSSSSSSS!!! (THIS IS ALSO POSTED ON JEANI'S TUMBLR SO YALL GO CHECK IT OUT THERE TOOOO!!!)

WHAT THE ROCKY HORROR CHARACTERS WOULD DO ON TUMBLR!!!!!

Frank: Frank posts shitty poetry that he writes meant to be a tribute to the TRAGEDY OF THE TUMBLR TITTY BAN. He recites it while pole dancing and/or just general thirst traps. But his content somehow never gets flagged, and he is so fucking insulted by this, it’s a badge of honor that pictures of somebody’s lawn has recieved, but not yet him? What does he have to do? He’s constantly getting asked along the lines of “CURLY HAIR ROUTINE ASAP” or “makeup tut please <3<3 “ and he will reply with a single product or just like a zoomed out pic of his bathroom sink for them to decode.

Brad: Brad thinks this is a dating app and posts his “Best” picture! This post (along with his bio) becomes one of those legendary Tumblr posts, it has gotten so blurry from screenshots to other sites that he is unrecognizable. Janet eventually shows him the ropes, but he still spends at least 24 hours just to “Learn what a ‘blorbo’ is goddamn it”. He also uses ‘Babygirl’ in the wrong context. Anyway, when he finally shows up on Janet's Blog, they’re like “Alright, this checks out” and then FRANK comes in like a wrecking ball, destroying all logic and making Brad lose half his followers but gain twice as many more.

Janet: Cottagecare Aesthetic blog. I know this in my bones. She would also reblog sentimental blackout poetry and little wholesome quotes. Half of her blog is BRAD MAJORS! She writes little love letters to him and posts pics of them together, just being Brad and Janet, they have a ship name at this point and are treated like fictional characters because of how incredibly, mind bogglingly sweet they are! Until somebody notices Frank in the background of one of her posts, and then she slowly starts posting progress on attaching rhinestones to burlesque attire (But she’s still all sweet with Brad in addition to this because she is an ICON).

Riff Raff: Riff Raff is the guy that saves everybody’s life with those little templates. Like if somebody didn’t post a blank version of that meme, he’s got you covered!. No Picrew link? Riff can and will find it, and both comment and reblog the post with the link. He also calls out internet scams, and will do so in the most helpful-but-still-trolling-them way possible. If you follow him, you’ll kind of get used to the little bits of advice that trickle into your feed. He doesn’t actually follow many people, and carefully curated his feed to perfection.

Magenta: Oh Magenta is here to TROLL PORN BOTS. She is here to troll porn bots in a MASSIVE way. She trolls them into being banned, but has LOTS of fun with it!!! She's gotten to the point where she has to seek THEM out because she's feared in the porn bot community! They know that she'll torture and bring them down!!! They can't stop her!!! She's like the stealthy tumblr superhero!!! She also makes so many snarky responses to people! She has the sassiest tongue on the internet and it strongly resembles the tone of the trope of the old lady who's completely lost her filter except she doesn't need to wait for old age for that one! Do NOT dare challenge her!!! She'll fully respond to passive aggression by cussing somebody out in the most powerful way possible and it's absolutely HILARIOUS. She's living her best life on tumblr and she's ADORING it so much!! She is an icon of sass and taking down porn bots, and we couldn't ask for a better hero here on tumblr!!!

Columbia: Columbia is an artist!!! She draws with the most amazing and eye-blinding palette out there!!! She loves what she's doing so much and she's SO talented!!! Its very neon and in a Pixar-esque style!!! Disney would hire her as an artist in a heartbeat!!! (But you must NEVER WORK WITH DISNEY COLUMBIA THEY'RE SO CORRUPT PLZ WORK WITH A COMPANY THAT WON'T STEAL ALL YOUR CREATIONS!!!) Her art is so bubbly and bright and fun!!! She also loves to make lists like these!!!! She's big in the world of fandom!!!! She loves it so much!!! She's sweet and fun and amazing!!!

Rocky: oh this sweet baby boy this sweet baby boy this SWEET BABY BOYYYYYY!!! First of all... he is just a darling, but this sweetheart is probably too young to have a Discord even! Let alone a Tumblr!!! That said, he's COMPLETELY safe!!! For two reasons!!! Number one, there's another part of everyone else's blogs that says "Don't you fucking hurt Rocky" or something close to it!!! Secondly, he's literally so pure of heart that you wouldn't dare!!!! He doesn't even know what to post about and the result is the best thing EVER!!! He'll post things like "I saw duckies today!" Or "I really really REALLY love bubbles!" Or a personal favorite, "I believe in unicorns!!!" He's a DARLING and probably has the most famous blog of anyone on this list solely because of how truly lovable he is!!! He is a true darling of the internet and he is BELOVED on Tumblr!!!

Eddie: Eddie uses his main blog as his own personal dartboard. Where Rocky’s little slices of life are sweet are cute, Eddie is that one guy who posts things like “I SWEAR TO GOD IF I NEED TO READ THE INSTRUCTIONS ON THIS FUCKING MICROWAVE FRENCH TOAST I WILL FIND WHOEVER MADE THIS AND RIP THE STILLBEATING HEART FROM THEIR BODY”. These rants either get hundreds of thousands of notes or absolutely none at all, there is no in between! Eddie has a sideblog for his motorcycle, and it’s actually really sweet!!! He talks about how he “adopted” Bessie (the name he’s given it) and the process of repairing her as well as the places he’s taken her!. BUT DO NOT CALL IT CUTE. He hates when anyone calls his little “relationship” with Bessie cute, and almost ran Brad over by the time the first “That’s ador- had left his mouth. Eddie knows all the lore of his favorite bands, and classic rock tumblr is constantly falling for his “Hey, I’m newer fan of (group or artist) could anyone explain what the (code name for bad even) Incident is?” He then reads the explanations aloud, sometimes with Frank, posting reaction videos on youtube/instagram!

Dr. Scott: Similarly to Brad, Dr. Scott severely misunderstood the point of tumblr. He was like “Oh, a place to share ideas? MY corner of the internet? This looks like a fun time!”. And…it goes how you would expect it to go. He makes every mistake that Brad did but worse. He falls for nearly every scam on the planet and has to be saved by the rest of the crew multiple times, actually tries to reason with both trolls and bots, doesn’t know how to block tags....etc. It took him a solid few months to learn how to reblog, and even longer to actually tag his own posts. He does eventually learn though! During a lecture, he forgets to close the tab before a lecture and the entire class sees his dashboard on the projector screen, and from there the entire lesson becomes “Tumblr 101”!

The Criminologist: He, like Eddie, has a main blog and a side blog!!!!! First, he's on the conspiracy theory side of tumblr and he and Doctor Scott will very occasionally cross paths and it is ALWAYS ICONIC! It's literally like those scenes in shows where the two masterfully secretive and manipulative characters interact and it's the FUNNIEST THING YOU'VE EVER SEEN IN YOUR LIFE!!! It's totally amazing!!! His side blog however, now that's when the chaos REALLY starts. See, he writes fanfic and is too embarrassed to ever admit it (even though it's Tumblr and that's one of the most important things that Tumblr is for!!!) What are these fanfics of you ask? Well they're Percibeth and Brad x Janet crossover fics of course! Also Eddie is Leo and Doctor Scott is Chiron because YES! However, this blog is discovered by Frank!!! Frank, who is ROYALLY pissed that he did NOT MAKE IT IN!?!?!? and that IT ISN'T SMUT!?!?!? What has the world come to?!?!? Of course, he outs this blog to everybody else!! It would be a disaster except for one thing!!!! This is TUMBLR!! And The Criminologist's identity is PROTECTED!!! Nobody knows!!!!! Shhhhhhhhhhhh

[st4rgirllv]

I had this idea that could maybe inspire you but I was thinking about a Reader who plays the electric guitar like crazy good and Mikey who just loves it (and maybe sings or hums playfully along since he was top3 best singer in Tokyo revengers 🙏🏻🙏🏻)

ᯓ★ Hi I just finished it I liked the idea so much but I just didn't have the words to make it a fic but I tried so here ya go!

Electric Love

Pairing: College!Mikey x Punk Rock!Reader cw: roommates to lovers (implied), music, punk rock!Reader, soft surprise, fluffy banter, electric guitar, shared talent

You were sure your college roommate, Manjiro Sano, wasn’t home.

He said he had a Toman meeting. And you trusted him to stick to his word—he usually did when it came to gang business. So, with the dorm to yourself and your fingers practically twitching with anticipation, you got to work.

You prepped everything. Guitar, amp, cables, extra picks—hell, you even tuned the strings twice. The dorm was in a quiet corner of campus that students avoided like the plague. Your rep as a loud, punk-rock-loving menace made it nearly impossible for anyone to willingly request the room beside yours.

Which worked out just fine.

Only one person seemed immune to your punk rock energy: Mikey. You respected him for that. For all his unpredictability and chaos, he never once complained. Still, you tried to keep it low-key around him. Soft riffs, quiet practice. Never the real thing. Never loud.

So when he said he’d be gone all evening?

Your eyes lit up like a stage spotlight.

You spent more time scrolling through your music library than setting up your gear. Nothing felt right—too mellow, too mainstream, too meh.

Eventually, you gave up and hit shuffle on your “electric soul” playlist.

And what came on?

“Now Playing: Me and Your Mama – Childish Gambino.”

“Old,” you muttered under your breath, a small smirk playing at your lips. “But definitely gold.”

You didn’t notice the front door open. Or the soft shuffle of sneakers.

You were too locked in.

The amp buzzed low. Your fingers gripped the neck of your guitar. You counted down the seconds until that part—the raw explosion of emotion where the guitar screamed louder than the lyrics. That was your cue.

Mikey had come home early—meeting cut short. He expected silence. Maybe a pot of instant ramen on the stove. What he didn’t expect was the sudden blast of Childish Gambino paired with the powerful, alive sound of your electric guitar echoing through the apartment like a live show in your bedroom.

“Y/N?” he called, stepping inside.

No response.

You were too deep in it—body swaying, fingers on fire, head bobbing with every sharp strum. And then you hit that solo. It tore through the room like a wild scream, electric and alive. Mikey’s lips parted, stunned.

“…Holy shit,” he muttered under his breath, drifting toward your door.

He recognized the song, sure. But it was your version that really pulled him in. Raw. Real. Better.

He started mouthing the lyrics instinctively, then full-on singing, voice blending with the music, full of gravel and soul.

You froze for half a second mid-riff—was that Mikey?—but you didn’t stop. You couldn’t. Not until the solo finished and you let the final note hang in the air, vibrating.

Then you turned to the doorway.

He was leaning against the frame, arms crossed, looking thoroughly impressed.

“Wow, I didn’t know you could sing,” you said breathlessly, brushing hair out of your face.

He shrugged like it was nothing. “Ehh, not as good as your guitar skills. But I try.”

A beat passed. You both stared. “Why didn’t you tell me you rock at the electric guitar?” he asked, walking fully into your room now.

You snorted, unplugging your guitar. “Because you’re usually here and I didn’t want to shatter your eardrums.”

He gave you a lazy grin, toeing at one of your pedals. “Nah, I like it. You looked... happy. Different. Loud, in a good way.”

You blinked.

He scratched the back of his neck. “Kinda makes me wanna hear you play more. Like... every day.”

“Oh yeah?” you teased, raising a brow. “What’s in it for me?”

He grinned wider now, stepping in closer—close enough to pluck a pick off your amp and hold it between his fingers. “I’ll bring snacks?”

You laughed. “Fine, deal,” you said.

And just like that, the quiet dorm didn’t feel so quiet anymore.

ᯓ★ I hope this doesn't sound as cringe as it is in my head | Masterlist

[dross-the-fish]

Why do you dislike Musical!PoTO?

I've heard that there are better versions than the ones I've seen (a couple of clips of boots on youtube, the 25th royal albert hall performance and the 2004 movie) so take my ranting with a grain of salt. I've said it before and if you've followed me you probably know by now that I don't care much for Andrew Lloyd Webber, I feel like he's very hit or miss and for every Jesus Christ Superstar he writes there's a Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat (pure shit, irredeemable, possibly the worst musical I've ever had to sit through) Something about Webber's music rubs me the wrong way, it seems like it's trying to be tongue-in-cheek but it just comes off as smug. Characters tend to feel extremely one-note. I HATE madam Giry in the musical. They kind of gave her the Daroga's role and it DOES NOT WORK. She says something early on in the film about how she thinks of Christine as a daughter but she doesn't do a fucking thing to protect her from Erik for the bulk of the musical? Like, you know what's going on, you know who her teacher is but your complicit in helping him deceive her? Why are you protecting him? It's not that you don't think he's dangerous, you clearly know he's capable of murder. I also hate how they handle Carlotta, she's not really a major character in the book and her singing is lacking not because she's bad but because she doesn't have any passion for her performances and she's wonderfully ruthless and calculating about ousting her competition. The depiction of a spoiled past her prime, primadonna who also can't sing and is too old for the roles she cast in is just another example of ALW being needlessly mean spirited. In the book she was actively manipulative about trying to kill Christine's career. There was something really villainous about the way she would use her popularity and her friends in high places to bribe the managers with flattery and gifts. She made newspapers stop giving Christine publicity to prevent her from getting her name out, then she filled the opera house with her own fans and supporters to outnumber anyone who was there for Christine. This woman has been in the game for a long time and she knows how to play it, probably because she's worked for years to build up her career and isn't ready to hand it over to some nobody from nowhere who happened to pop up on the one night Carlotta couldn't perform. You could write Carlotta with so much nuance and give her layers, make her an INTERESTING antagonist and ALW just doesn't. He goes for the low hanging fruit. The laziest trope he could have picked. Spoiled, vain and no actual talent. Given how much creative control over the movie he had I'm going to count that as his official adaptation of the musical and it takes everything I already don't like about the musical and makes it WORSE. Also I said before ALW writes music like someone who enjoys rock but doesn't actually understand it? "We needed somebody who has a bit of rock and roll sensibility in him. He's got to be a bit rough, a bit dangerous; not a conventional singer. Christine is attracted to the Phantom because he's the right side of danger." -Andrew Lloyd Webber on the character of Erik for the 2004 film. Honestly, no? No he doesn't, he has no rock and roll sensibility. Not in your musical, not in the book, not in the movie. What are you talking about Andy? That ridiculous guitar riff during the song The Phantom of the Opera? Because that meshed about as well with your hokey showtune style as eating cole slaw with your Chinese takeout. You CAN do it but you really shouldn't. "The film looks and sounds fabulous and I think it's an extraordinarily fine document of the stage show. While it doesn't deviate much from the stage material, the film has given it an even deeper emotional centre. It's not based on the theatre visually or direction-wise, but it's still got exactly the same essence. And that's all I could have ever hoped for." – Andrew Lloyd Webber

Andy you're full of crap. Go home. That said there are moments and songs I really like. Wishing you Were Somehow Here Again is heartbreaking and I like to think that she's talking about Erik and the broken pedestal of their relationship as much as she is her father. I don't know if that was intentional but I like the angle of Christine feeling heartbroken at the loss of a friend and father. But well, ALW ships Erik and Christine so of course that angle is never really considered. We get one moment where Christine is upset and says she gave Erik her mind blindly and one where she admits to being frightened of him before the performance of Don Juan, but I feel like as much as Christine is verbally resistant to him and clearly terrified of him the musical doesn't really validate her and takes every opportunity to build up the sexual tension between her and the phantom. The supporting characters don't really help either, Madam Giry is complicit in Erik's manipulations, Raoul seems largely dismissive and more focused on hunting down Erik when he finally believes her than protecting Christine (AllI Ask of You is a nice song but Raoul's actions and attitude before and after make it feel a bit hollow). In some weird ways I get why people watch the musical and think Erik is the better choice despite...the stalking, kidnapping and murder. No one is really committed to protecting this girl, not even the people who claim to love her. I can easily see how she'd still feel a need to cling to her angel of music even after the mask comes off given how completely ALONE she seems while surrounded by people who allegedly care about her. I also don't like how Raoul is depicted. Maybe it's the actors but I feel like he and Christine don't have chemistry and half the time he seems annoyed with her. Especially Hadley Frasier feels like he's ten minutes from being completely done, he has no patience. I don't buy that this is a man who ran into the sea to fetch her scarf or would run into a dangerous underground lair to rescue her but I do buy that he's going to become a drunken asshole in 10 years so I guess what they did with him in LND is predictable even if it is completely stupid. If you made it to the bottom of this rant congratulations, I hope that explains why I am not among the musical's phans and why I don't like how much it eclipses the book or other versions. I do think it's good but overrated and the flaws are more than I can over look. And yet I still seek it out from time to time, I still like the parts of it that I like and that I think do work. It's like a toxic ex I can't fully break up with, which I suppose is kind of fitting given the subject matter.

[deep-sea-scyphomedusa]

PnF Season 5A Songs Miscellaneous Thoughts/Ranking

Haven't seen anyone do this yet, so here goes! These are just my opinions and as you will see I am extremely biased in some cases lol. I did have a hard time ranking these, honestly the songs from #5-13 could shift around after I listen to them more. There were very few songs I didn't like this season and I thought it was pretty good overall! :)

21. So Much More Than an Intern

I was never really a huge fan of the original Carl Theme, and it being cut up here doesn't help it. Unfortunate because I really like Carl and his episode.

20. I Have A Hat for That

It's fine. Doesn't really make me feel anything, I'm neutral on this one.

19. Song of the Summer

Cute, but nothing to write home about. Not worthy of being vaporized though :(

18. All Downhill From Here

Not bad, I liked the song sequence joke. Don't have many thoughts on this one tho sorry.

17. Suspend Your Disbelief

Not particularly memorable, but points for the Beautifully Rendered Backdrop joke and Schmebulock

16. Submarine Sandwich Submarine

I liked it, but unfortunately I do have to dock points for the first section being extremely similar to the Wellerman for some reason?

15. Forced Perspective Western Town

Short and Sweet! Very fun western song, just wish it were a bit longer.

14. Do The Tidy Up

Unexpectedly very catchy?

13. I’m Reading/ I’m Eating

"I'm Reading" by itself is good, but the two versions of the song together are what make it really fun, although I do think it works a little bit better in the soundtrack version than in the show. Also, the Doof plants just repeating "I'm eating, I'm a plant" is very funny, their voices are very cute :)

12. Agent T for Teen

Fun parody with some good new lyrics! The Agent P theme was already a banger so this one is too!

11. Tropey McTropeFace

It's a crime this isn't on the album. It's so good, and Michael Bublé was perfect for it!

10. Today I get to be Candace

Very silly, was pleasantly surprised that Buford was singing this one after hearing the leaked version! Add another one to the "Buford is queer" counter :)

9. Watch it Burn

Super cool! Would never have expected this genre from PnF but it's so good.

8. Disco Sphere

For such a short song, this one is a banger. Am I biased due to my love of disco? Yes. Should I probably not rank a 15-second song this high? Probably also yes. But I am doing it anyway because I love it and it should have been longer! ✨🕺🪩💃✨

7. When the Tri-State Aurora Comes Around

This one is also probably ranked higher than other people might put it, but I love a good bossa nova and this one does not disappoint. It's so satisfying to listen to, and I love the fun vocal riffs at the end! Also points for fun weather-themed wordplay

6. Pet Wash

Extremely catchy and groovy. The little fast sections in the chorus (ex. "You're gonna walk out the door saying Oh My Gosh") scratch my brain and they've been stuck in my head since I first saw it. I love the little dances everybody does in this one, especially the Fireside Girls making the dogs dance, the pets are so cute :)

5. No Sleepin’ At A Slumber Party

You know a PnF song is going to be good when all of the characters get to sing and interact. No notes, just extremely fun!

4. No One Understands Me

Heck yeah another Doof/Candace duet! I love the "doo-wop" style harmonies in the background, they add so much to the song! For some reason reminds me of Schoolhouse Rock but I'm not sure why? Something about how they explain the problem in the song maybe, idk might just be me with this one.

3. Stabby Barf Pain

Say what you want about Meep Me In St. Louis, but this song is a bop! Once again the harmonies are angelic and I love the joke about it being the fifth season. Also points for calling back to S'Winter/S'Fall

2. License to Bust

This song goes HARD. They put it in the trailer for a reason! Love the catchy lyrics and Candace doing crazy stunt driving. It's definitely my favorite "regular" song of the drop!

1. Summer Is Starting Right Now

S tier PnF song, and such a great intro for the revival! For me this one goes right up there with Summer Belongs to You and Carpe Diem. I love it so much!

Honorable Mention/Not Sure Where to Put This:

Mom's Stuck on A Zipline:

Wasn't planning to rank the non-5A album songs, but this one was too funny to not mention. Extremely good and I am excited for it to be in the show!