#but the giant octopus is the one people know the most so maybe he's that

[problemswithbooks]

There's a few minor characters in a later One Piece arc that disprove your theory re: inheritance of fish-like traits, but your world-building speculation is really interesting!

Actually one of Big Mom’s young sons looks fully Fishmen. De-Chat.

Got these two asks so I looked into it a bit more.

Something I find really interesting is that Big Mom's kids, De-chat and his mermaid sisters look nearly the same as full-blooded fishmen and merfolk. Big Mom is interesting because she doesn't really look human due to her size but is apparently just a little to short to count as a giant. It might be possible that she has giant ancestors somewhere in her past--but also who knows, she could also have fishmen or merfolk ancestors as well.

Again, this is just me trying to make sense of One Piece biology that was never supposed to make any sense. Oda only designs characters based on how they look and fit into the story. He's not going to limit his artistic talent to reality or make world building rules that might also put restrictions on what he can draw.

But for me, how I'd make sense of Big Mom's kids looking so much like their seafolk fathers is to say that somewhere in her background she has a fish-person or merfolk parent. Given how Oda says their dna works, with it remembering any secondary species (like whale shark, or goldfish) it makes sense that human hybrids generally get more human traits because one parent lacks a secondary species to pull from. Meanwhile, both fish-people and merfolk are human, so the genes have more ways of combining in a way that emphasis human traits.

But if someone has seafolk ancestors their dna would still carry that secondary species, even if they themselves do not have any fish traits. If they then had children with a fish-man or mermaid that child could have a higher chance of inheriting fish traits. This could explain why Big Mom has such pure looking seafolk children.

Meanwhile other hybrids we see like Sapi look nearly entirely human except for a fin on his head. Dellinger is interesting because he looks almost fully human as well, but most of it seems to be because he can hide those traits. He can choose whether or not to have human teeth, or hide his fin.

I'm no expert on dna or genealogy so my head-cannon is probably nonsense, but to me seafolk kind of feel like eeve in a way, where they're dna is kind of unstable. Whenever they have kids what they look like is a complete crap-shoot, where anything is possible. On top of that it doesn't seem like their abilities or size is always determined by their fish traits. Some of them look nearly human, except with non-human skin tones, while others look extremely inhuman--like Zeo or Hammond.

Which again is very purposeful on Oda's part. He's drawing cool characters. The reasons why they look the way they do doesn't matter to him at all. I just try and come up with reasons because I find it fun.

[hxney-lemcn]

When You Nerd Out (Biology Edition) — Overblots x gn! reader

summery: the overblots find out you're more of a nerd than they realized...

tw: mentions of bugs (not really but I digress), mentions of arachnids (literally just the name of one lol), mentions of reptiles (idk maybe people are scared of them), mentions of snakes.

a/n: a reptile show is happening soon and I've been looking into so many reptiles/invertebrates/amphibians I had to get this out of my system somehow. What better way then to ramble to fictional characters? (Help me)

wc: 1.2k (~180 per character)

Master List

❥ Riddle Roseheart

When Riddle first met you, you were downtrodden, having just been thrown into a new world filled with magic and flair that yours didn’t. Your grades weren’t the best (but far from the worst), and you always seemed tired no matter what. So when your eyes lit up when he showed you the flamingo and hedgehog cages/pens he was surprised at the amount of facts that spilled from your lips. From how flamingos get their color to how hedgehogs are carnivores. Or how you could even ramble on about flowers and plants, like how tea garden roses are the most short lived species. From then on, Riddle would come to you for even the smallest of things. Did you want to feed the animals with him? This rose bush is wilting, are there any tips to bring it back? Do you know the meaning behind the colors of roses? No particular reason for that last question…just don’t question the bouquet of white and red roses mixed with baby’s breath that show up on your doorstep the next day.

❥ Leona Kingscholar

It was hard not to notice when you seemed to be on the brink of exploding. How you’d stare at awe in Leona’s presence, as you should. But your eyes would always wander to his ears, teeth, tail, nails. It got to a point that he felt like you were mentally dissecting him. It was his downfall to growl out a short “what”, as you started to pile on questions to the beastman prince. “Are your nails sharper than a humans?”, “How much better can you hear?”, “Does your tail help you balance?” All Leona could do was stare at you with boredom. Who knew his herbivore was a nerd? He supposes he could humor you for a little bit. Press his sharp nails lightly into your skin, a teasing smile as he asks if you’d like a test. Perhaps a nibble to show you how well his canines work? It all goes awry when you start taking interest in other beastmen, who cares about the cheetah or leopard bestmen when you have a lion prince right here?

❥ Azul Ashengrotto

Azul never thought twice about where he’s come from. He’s seen many kinds of merpeople, many kinds of fish or crustaceans or sharks. But he knew land dwellers didn’t have that, which is why he has the giant aquarium in his lounge. He got used to the awed expressions as well, more focused on swindling the poor souls. So when your jaw dropped and how you clearly restrained yourself from running up to the giant aquarium, Azul felt giddy. He could offer you something most couldn’t. He’d watch as you’d point out a fish or ray that you saw and explain how much you loved the color or how magnificent it looked. When you brought up how smart you thought octopi are, it was over. His heart couldn’t take it. You know he was an octopus merperson right? You were basically complimenting him without realizing it. He couldn’t get over how you stared in wonder at the blue ringed octopus that was waving back at you. And oh sevens you were giggling at it? He wasn’t getting jealous over another octopus, no way…

❥ Jamil Viper

Jamil noticed the excited look in your eyes when you learned his last name was Viper, but nothing had happened at the time. It wasn’t until Kalim had you rambling about animals did Jamil realize just how much you seemed to love snakes. How you named your favorite in a heartbeat to how you scrutinized the ones you looked into as pets. It wasn’t until Kalim started to offer to buy you all those snakes and more did he have to step in. Yet Jamil felt flustered when your gaze landed on him, your eyes that had been filled with fondness while rambling about snakes had only seemed to get brighter when looking at him. Reluctantly, Jamil let you drag him to a reptile show, something Kalim had pushed him to do. For his own sanity, Jamil ignored the giant pouch of money Kalim tried to stealthily hand you, instead, focusing on your awed expression at the variety of animals. He couldn’t help but watch the snakes in awe with you, and when you asked him if he wanted to help you set up an enclosure for one…who was he to say no?

❥ Vil Schoenheit

Vil is a busy man. With photo and movie shoots to interviews to taking care of himself, there isn’t much time to stop and smell the roses. But with you, he tries to make time, and it's like a breath of fresh air every time. It was nice to sit outside and bask in the sun (with sunscreen of course) and talk with you. Something had clearly caught your eye when you dropped from the bench to scoop something off the ground. Vil thought he knew you well enough…apparently not. He hadn’t expected to see you shove a rolly polly, pill bug, potato bug, whatever you want to call them into his face…okay maybe he’s exaggerating. You held the little thing far enough away that it wasn’t all too startling. He swore he never saw you so excited about something, or how you rambled that they weren’t bugs, but crustaceans that live on land. The way you gently held the critter to how fondly you looked at the curled up thing made Vil’s heart flutter. You always seemed to find beauty in things most would shudder at. How odd.

❥ Idia Shroud

Idia had no idea how you managed, but you had convinced him to get a plant. You had called it a zz plant, and thought it would be perfect to liven his room up as it didn’t need direct sunlight. He watched the plant as it sat next to a grow light, it needed something since he didn’t have any windows. The dark purple leaves were pretty, you were right. As much as he tried to keep up with watering, he would forget, but Ortho seemed to have it covered. When little leaves started sprouting, Idia felt proud, a weird feeling he wasn’t used to. When you came over and saw how well it was doing you beamed. That stupid fluttery feeling filled him as you praised him, not to mention it mixing with feeling proud. Not a good combo, as now he was thinking of asking you if there’s any other plant you may recommend, just to get you rambling once more about different plants that could thrive in his little cave of a room.

❥ Malleus Draconia

Although Malleus loves to hear your voice, you always seem content to hear him ramble. The way your eyes watched intently, trying to find what he was pointing out on a gargoyle, or how you’d ask questions about the differences of a gargoyle and grotesque. At first, he was concerned when you gasped, had you gotten hurt somehow? Yet he found you excitedly pointing out a house gecko that stood near the gargoyle he was talking about. He watched you in awe as your eyes glittered, and how you were basically jumping up and down. Then you started going on about geckos, reptiles, and all sorts of odd things people keep as pets. The way you basically swooned at the thought of owning a crested gecko or a crocodile skink, Malleus was ready to hand you all the money you needed. He is the best and worst, as he’ll never tell you no and fund your hobby till your heart’s content. Just make sure to pay attention to him too, yeah? Unlike skinks or tarantula’s, he likes your affection. Plus, he’s the best reptile of them all, no? He’d gladly show you his dragon form.

[cosmerelists]

Stormlight Characters Meet an Octopus

As requested by @miss-madithe-baddie :)

It's Octopus Time on Roshar!

1. Kaladin

Kaladin: [stares at octopus] Octopus: [stares at Kaladin] Kaladin: So it...what? Is it one of those creatures that squishes down into crevices during storms? It doesn't look like it has bones. Kaladin: Kinda big though. Would need a big crevice. Octopus: [stares at Kaladin] Kaladin: ... Kaladin: I feel like it's judging me, somehow.

2. Bridge Four

Moash: Well, I don't like it. Moash: An animal with no carapace is unnatural. Rlain: ...You're an animal without a carapace. Moash: W-Well, it's different for humans! We can build houses! Drehy: Maybe the giant squish bug builds houses. Drehy: We all saw it pick up the shell and put it on its head. Skar: That's more fashion than construction, I think. Sigzil: We saw it go into the water. It's a sea creature. Sigzil: Sea creatures don't need carapaces like land animals do. Moash: It's on the land right now!! Skar: Guys, shut up! It's wearing a shell as a hat again! Renarin: It really is quite fashionable.

3. Adolin

Adolin: Sure is weird looking! Adolin: Look! It has little sticky cups under its legs! Kaladin: D-Don't grab it! It's gonna bite you! Adolin: I bet it can crawl up walls 'n' stuff! Adolin: Hey, isn't that something you can do too, Bridgeboy? Kaladin: I use Stormlight! Not sticky vine legs! Adolin: Bet its some kind of tiny Windrunner. Kaladin: It is NOT!

4. Shallan

Shallan: Hush, all of you. Shallan: This thing is beautiful! Gorgeous! Octopus: [abruptly changes color to match surroundings] Shallan: !! Shallan: Talented! Amazing! Shallan: This might be the most important drawing I'll ever do! Adolin: ...You drew me last week for our wedding anniversary? Shallan: [already drawing] And you didn't even change color ONCE!

5. Lopen

Lopen: [staring intently at octopus] Lopen: [staring intently at octopus] Lopen: [staring intently at octopus] Lopen: [concentration face] Rock: ...You're trying to grow more arms, aren't you? Lopen: I didn't know EIGHT was an option!

6. Zahel

Zahel: I've seem those things before. Zahel: Very smart. Zahel: Very tasty. Rock: ...Tasty you say? Shallan: NO

7. Navani

Navani: Seeing this bizarre creature gives me so many ideas. Navani: Dalinar, do you think we should build semi-aquatic vehicles that can go on both land and water and develop color-changing camouflage technology? Dalinar [trying to be a supportive husband]: And perhaps the land-water vehicle could have...tentacles? Navani: No ideas are wrong in the brainstorming stage. Navani: But also no.

8. Dieno (the Mink)

Dieno: [gives octopus a bro nod] Octopus: [gives Dieno a bro nod back] Dalinar: ...What was that? Dieno: Ah, it is nothing! Just two master escape artists recognizing each other. Dalinar: Escape...artist? Dalinar: This creature has done nothing but sit on that rock and occasionally go into that pool this whole time. Dieno: Yet nevertheless, people like us...we recognize each other. Dalinar: ... Dalinar: [doubtfully] If you say so. 

9. Dalinar

It is later. Dalinar is walking through Urithiru. Something from above touches his face with a thwick sound. He looks up. The Octopus is looking down at him from the ceiling, one tentacle reaching down. Lift is also in the ceiling. Lift gives him a thumbs up. Dalinar keeps walking.

10. Lift

Lift: Today has been the greatest day of my life. Lift: I had no IDEA there so many vents 'n' shit that someone like you could squish through! Lift: And when you used your dark water attack to push that button? Amazing! Lift: Even I had trouble keeping up with you!! Lift: Truly, you are my new best friend.

[peachesofteal]

Grocery list

Just a drabble. Belongs somewhere in the Sassy series. Set in the future.

Simon Riley/female reader - Soft dad Simon Riley 700ish words - Sassy series AO3 Warnings-tags: 18+ Minors DNI. Reader is referred to as mom, a little PTSD, Simon is a good dad, fluff, comfort.

Simon’s pushing a trolley up and down the aisles of the supermarket with an almost three-year-old Theo bouncing in the seat, facing him. 

"Where mum." Theo babbles. "Mum, momma, mum." He's got good language skills, something Simon attributes more to you than himself, as you're constantly narrating everything you do and pointing out names of even the most mundane items. 

"She's at home, bug." Theo, like his dad, is obsessed with you. Anytime they leave the house without you, it’s nonstop questions about where you are, if you’re coming with them, what you’re doing, until Simon can find something to distract him with. Today, it’s anything colorful in the grocery store. 

“It’s just a phase.” You told Simon while Theo clung to you a few hours ago, arms and legs wrapping around your kneecaps like an octopus. “They do this. They want mom, and then dad, and then who knows. Maybe Uncle Johnny will be his favorite again.” Theo perks up at Johnny’s name, staring between the two of you with his cherub face, brown-blonde curls framing his head like a halo. 

“’cle Johnny here?” 

“No, baby. Sorry.” You raise an eyebrow, and gesture down to the toddler. 

“Alright big guy.” He says, scooping Theo into his arms. “What do ya say we run mom’s errands and then go to the park?” 

“Yeah!” Theo squeals, and Simon can���t help but chuckle. You put a gentle hand on Theo’s back and stand on your tip toes to try to land a kiss on both of them. 

“Be good for dad, okay? Help him with the grocery list.” You blow a raspberry on Theo’s cheek, making him giggle, and then you turn to Simon, who bends at the waist so you can press your lips to his. 

“Love you.” you squeeze his bicep affectionately. 

“Love you.” He echoes. 

"Hooome." Theo sounds the word out slowly, little hand reaching towards something on the shelf that's caught his eye. Sprinkles. Simon bites back a groan. "Cake?" he asks, inflection rising on the 'ke' with excitement. "Cake? Cake fa mum?"  "How about flowers for mom?" He turns the trolley towards the front, where the flowers stand in tiered formation in the cold section. Theo nods enthusiastically, kicking his feet and wiggling his whole body. 

“Lellow!” he shrieks when he sees the giant bouquets of sunflowers, pointing at them with a demanding finger when they come to a stop in front of the selection. “Lellow flower.” Simon’s checking the text from you on his phone, comparing your long list with his mental checklist, making sure he hasn’t forgotten anything. Potatoes, puffs, bananas, peaches, broccoli, almondmilk, cheerios- 

Glass crashes. 

Theo screams. Simon tenses, fight thrumming through his blood, muscles priming, body electrifying and preparing as he steadies his breathing. 

A second passes, not even. He turns. 

A broken vase of sunflowers lays shattered on the ground next to trolley, where Theo’s hand is outstretched, tears pouring from his eyes, a loud wailing sound erupting from his lungs.

“Hey, hey. You’re okay.” He pulls Theo from the seat immediately, briefly checking him over for injury and then pulling him into his chest. “It’s alright.” He bounces the inconsolable little boy as people walk past and give him sympathetic smiles. “Jus’ scared ya, huh?” Simon rubs his back as Theo presses his face into his dad’s neck, his lower lip trembling, fingers gripping tight to his sweatshirt. 

“Flowers broken.” He sniffles. 

“We’ll get new ones for her, yeah?” Theo nods a yes, face still buried against him. “Here, you pick.” He moves the trolley slightly out of the way, so the two of them are standing in front of the display. “Which ones for mum?” Theo pushes himself upwards, turning to take in all the different flowers, brows furrowed until he’s pointing at another bundle of sunflowers. “Good choice lad.” He shifts to plop Theo back into the seat after pulling them off the shelf, but he squirms, gripping tight to his neck. 

“No down.” Simon sighs. He knows if you were here, you’d tell Theo he had to sit in the seat, that he can’t be carried everywhere. 

But you’re not here. And Simon doesn’t particularly mind holding his son every chance he gets. 

So, he pushes the trolley to the checkout line with one hand, the other arm holding Theo up, who lays on his chest, little fingers playing with the strings of his hoodie, tears forgotten after a hug from his dad.

The latest fic in this series is here.

[vodika-vibes]

Your Monnk headcanons got me thinking about a modern au surfer!Monnk or diver!Monnk x reader fic 👀 so I will kindly be requesting that to add fuel to mine and your obsession 💖

When The Sun Goes Down

Summary: You’ve never been a beach girl. There’s always too much sun, too much sand, and too many people for you to consider the beach a good time, let alone a relaxing time. It's too bad that your friend group has a majority rules policy, so you’re dragged to the beach even though you hate it. A chance meeting with a surfer might just change your opinion, though.

Pairing: Commander Monnk x F!Reader

Word Count: 1667

Warnings: Implications adult activities, reader got ditched by her friends

A/N: So the premise of this story is "make bad decisions in your twenties that turns out to be not such a bad decision". Also, there might be some errors because I'm actually hurting right now but Monnk is worth it. Also, the reader is based on me, only I never had a meet cute at the beach.

Click HERE to be added to my taglist

You like to think that you’re a pretty chill person. Things don’t bother you, not really. Not in the way they bother your friends.

But you also think that you might hate the beach.

You’ve never enjoyed it, even when you were a kid. But somehow it has become even more intolerable now that you’re an adult. The sand gets everywhere, and it’s always packed with people.

Your friends say it’s time for a “hot-girl summer” and you’d rather be elsewhere. Literally, anywhere else would be preferable to where you are. You’d even take a volcano at this point.

A small frown crosses your face as you stretch your legs out in front of you. Your friends have long since ditched you to go swimming, well, except for the ones who ditched you to flirt with the group of surfers who arrived at the same time as you all did.

You suppose you could get up and go do something. It’s not like you have anything to watch. The only items that are on the beach are the blankets you brought to sit on, and the book you’re reading. Everything else was left in the car.

A group of old men inch closer to your blanket, and you heave out a deeply frustrated sigh. You’re done.

You hop to your feet, gather your book and blanket, and then walk down to the firmer sand near the water. There’s got to be someplace on this beach where you can sit without being ogled by old men, right?

So, you start walking.

And, eventually, you find yourself in a quieter part of the beach. Honestly, at first, you think you wandered onto a private beach as there are that few people nearby, though you quickly realize that this part of the beach is largely empty because there are no shops or public bathrooms in the area. 

You’re considering setting up your blanket here when you hear someone walking in the water. A man is walking in the water, holding a surfboard. At first blush, you think that he’s one of the men your friends were flirting with, but then realize that he doesn’t look anything like them.

He’s taller, for one, and broader. With bleached hair pulled into a messy bun at the base of his skull. Some of his hair is falling out of his bun, and you notice that there’s a hint of blue at the ends.

But his most obvious feature is the giant tattoo covering his body. An octopus of some kind, you think. But you’ve never been good at identifying sea animals. 

He glances at you, a wide grin on his face, “Great day for surfin’ isn’t it?”

“Oh! Well, I wouldn’t know. I don’t surf.” You reply sheepishly.

“No? It’s fun~” He offers temptingly.

“Maybe if you’re coordinated,” You joke, “I’m so clumsy I trip over air.”

“Wanna learn?” He asks, his eyes bright.

You’re surprised for a moment, and then a startled laugh falls from your lips, “Do you often offer to teach people you just met how to surf?”

His grin widens, “I do when they look like you.”

“Ah, so this is you trying to hit on me.”

“This is me succeeding in hitting on you.” He counters as he approaches you. He sets his board in the sand and offers you his hand, “Monnk.”

“Sorry?”

“My name. It’s Monnk.” You must shoot him an odd look, because he lets out a laugh, “I know, I know. It’s not a normal name, but at least I’m not named after an animal, my older twin brothers are named Wolffe and Fox.”

“That’s…interesting.” You offer sheepishly as you take his hand.

“It’s weird as fuck, you don’t have to lie for my sake.” His hands are warm and calloused, and he presses his free hand over the top of yours.

It’s weird, but even though you just met Monnk you feel comfortable around him. Even though he’s touching you more than would be considered appropriate. 

A tiny smile crosses your lips and you offer him your name.

Although you’re wearing a bikini (a tiny yellow one, at your best friend’s insistence) Monnk’s gaze never strays from your face. It’s kind of nice, being seen as a person rather than a pair of tits.

“So, what do you think, Lotus? Wanna learn how to surf?”

You want to question him about the strange nickname, but his second question takes all of your attention. Nervously, you bite your lower lips, and his gaze drops to your lips for a moment, and then back to your eyes.

“What if I fall?”

“Then you fall.”

“But, I’m wearing a bikini, if I fall then it might come loose—” You fret.

“There’s no one here but us, and I won’t tell anyone if you have a wardrobe malfunction,” Monnk replies, his voice earnest. You shoot him a look, and he laughs softly, “Or, you can wear my shirt.” He offers you a dark blue tee shirt.

“But it’s yours.”

“And now it’s yours. Because I’m a stellar person.” Monnk teases.

You’re running out of reasons to deny him. And, truthfully, you don’t want to deny him. You glance up at him and pull his shirt on. It hangs on you, he’s just that much bigger than you are, “I’m not the strongest swimmer.” You admit.

“I won’t let you get hurt.” And when Monnk says it, you can’t help but believe him. 

“Yeah, alright.”

He grins at you and tugs you toward the water, pausing only long enough to grab his board.

Several hours later, you’re soaked and a little sore. His shirt is clinging to you uncomfortably, and your hair is stuck to your face. But for the first time you can remember, you’re having a good time at the beach.

But now the sun is setting, and you aren’t ready for the day to end.

At the moment, you’re sitting on his board, while his arms are resting on your thighs and his chin resting on his folded arms. Now that you’re closer to him, you can tell that his tattoo isn’t an octopus. You think it might be a squid of some kind.

“You like it?” 

Your gaze drifted from his tattoo to his face, “Sorry?”

“My tattoo.” He clarifies, “Do you like it?”

“It’s a squid of some kind, right?”

“It’s the Kraken,” Monnk agrees, “It took ages to get done. Especially since it covers most of my body.”

“I bet it hurt.”

“Like a bitch, but it was worth it.” Monnk grins, “My General says that I should add a ship being destroyed by the Kraken, but I’m thinking I’ll add a mermaid instead.” One of his fingers glides across the outside of your thigh, “How about it, lotus? Wanna become my mermaid?”

“Do any of these lines work?” You ask, amused.

“Dunno, you’re the first person I’m using them on. So you tell me.”

Oh. You’re face burns with flustered embarrassment.

Then Monnk grins at you, “Yeah. It’s working.”

“You’re the worst, you know that?”

“And yet, you’re here. With me. Letting me touch you. So I guess I’m not that bad.”

You huff and splash him with some water, making him laugh and tug you off the board.

The sudden cold water makes you squeak in surprise, and you splash him again, “Mean!” Anything else you might have said to him is cut off when his arms slide around your waist and he pulls you flush against him. 

“Mm, you’re soft.” The wide grin has faded into something softer and you avert your gaze, embarrassed. He lightly bumps his forehead against yours, and your eyes find his again.

“You’re going to regret this, Monnk.” You whisper to him.

“I’ve never regretted anything a day in my life,” He counters, his voice quiet, “I’m not going to start now.”

You don’t know what to say to that, so you don’t say anything. Then it doesn’t matter, as his lips catch yours in a kiss that starts mild but quickly grows more and more passionate.

And when his hands slide under the long shirt that you’re wearing, you can’t help but sigh against his lips. How long has it been since someone touched you like this?

Monnk laughs against your lips and pulls you closer.

By the time the pair of you return to shore, the sun has long since set.

Monnk apologizes about taking so much of the day from you, though there’s no actual apology in his voice. He almost sounds smug about it. He does look smug about it.

Then you realize that your friends ditched you, with no way to call home.

“Ah, sorry lotus. That is my fault,” Monnk says as he drapes an arm over your shoulder.

“No, it’s fine,” You fold your arms, “They’re the ones who left me here, so it’s their fault.”

“You can crash with me,” Monnk offers, “My hotel room has room for two. Tomorrow I’ll buy you some clothes and give you a lift home.”

That would work, hotels offer shampoo and the like at no cost after all. “You don’t mind?”

“Do I mind having the gorgeous woman I just spent several hours getting to know sharing my bed? No, no I don’t.”

You shoot him an amused look, “I feel bad for messing up your vacation.”

“Don’t be, I have to return home tomorrow anyway.” Monnk grins at you, “This just means that I get to spend the whole night learning you properly before I return you home.”

“Pervert,” 

“I didn’t hear you complaining earlier.”

You steadfastly ignore the way your face is burning, “That’s not the point.”

Monnk laughs, “Come on, sweetheart. I’ll even be a good date and buy you dinner before taking you back to bed.”

“Back to bed implies that we used a bed, Monnk.”

He glances at you, his eyes dancing with laughter, “Well then, this will be a treat for us both.”

@imabeautifulbutterfly

@n0vqni

@bad4amficideas

@justiceandwar98

@mira-loves-star-wars

@tiredbi-peach

@dukeoftheblackstar

@trixie2023

@kimiheartblade

@padawancat97

@falconfeather23435

@etod

@bb8-99

@kiss-anon

@continous-mistakes

@yoitsjay

@liz-stat

@cc--2224

@adriennelenoir

@cdblake1565

@sweater-sloot

@heidnspeak

@wax-birds

@silly-starfish

@lonewolflupe

@maniacalbooper

[weirdmarioenemies]

Name: Mario Land

Debut: Super Mario Land 2: 6 Golden Coins

So I was lying awake in bed, thinking. What is up with Mario Land? Everyone knows that the setting of the first Super Mario Land game is Sarasaland. Nintendo loves to vaguely allude to it in character descriptions for Princess Daisy! But where does Super Mario Land 2 take place? Well, it’s in Mario Land, of course! Now, Super Mario Land does not take place in Mario Land. It takes place in a Land, in which Mario is a participant, but he doesn’t own the Land, just as he doesn’t own the World or the Galaxy. But he does own Mario Land!

Nothing is really clear about how Mario came to own Mario Land. Nintendo Power once described it as his ‘kingdom’, while the Wiki describes it as Mario’s ‘private island’. Lots of people immediately remark on how odd it is that Mario owns a castle in this game, and they’re right! It is odd! We don’t think of Mario as an avaricious man. He is a humble, working class individual. He lives in a cottage with his brother despite being a world-renowned hero. Except here, where he owns an entire landmass, with a castle! My personal canon, in my head, was that Peach or someone else gifted him with a large chunk of land and a castle as a reward for his heroic deeds. It seems the most likely, given what we know about Mario! But why couldn’t he settle for a vacation home, or anything of the sort? Why are we placing the responsibility of land ownership on such a modest soul? 

I think what is the strangest thing about Mario Land, to me, is that despite being Mario’s Land, it is so devoid of allies. Mario Land is vast and untamed, a collection of wacky themed zones filled with creatures entirely hostile to Mario! There are no maids or servants from Mario’s Castle, who fled Wario’s invasion. There are no Toads or Toad houses to aid Mario in his quest. Mario is entirely alone in a Land that bears his name, but his name only. Once his only symbol of power, his castle, is gone, Mario is back where he began, all alone in this foreign land. All the material goods in the world could not fill the void of - wait I’m sorry I completely forgot a key detail of Mario Land 2’s plot is that Wario put all of Mario Land’s inhabitants under a spell! False alarm everyone!

Everyone in Mario Land is actually Super Nice actually and was just brainwashed by Wario, who has the power of dark magic. The Big Bird from Tree Zone and the Octopus from Turtle Zone, and also Spikey, they all love Mario and see him as their king. I was gonna say the Witch too, but it seems the witch was Wario’s friend. Or are they Wario’s minions? If so, where are the inhabitants of Mario Land? Are they in hiding? We never see them! Who does Mario rule over? Is Spikey a wild animal? A brainwashed citizen of Mario’s country? Or an ally of the wicked and greedy Wario?

And of course, we have to discuss the matter of the Mario Zone. Mario was not content with having a Land, he needed to have a Zone in that Land, which is also Mario! It is actually one big Mario, a mechanical automaton built in his likeness. Mario has always expressed an interest in making toys of himself, as we see in the Mario Vs. Donkey Kong series, so it stands to reason that his major construction project would be just that, but bigger! 

Or maybe the Mario Zone always existed, before Mario came to Mario Land. Maybe it’s named Mario Land because one of its most famous natural formations is a giant wind-up toy that looks like Mario! And Mario’s Castle is named that by coincidence. I don’t know! I don’t have answers to any questions, ever! I literally don’t know anything! I’m going to bed!

Just kidding! I’m not going to bed. This post is a bit, um... rambly. But I thought it would be a shame to conclude it without appreciating how whimsical Mario Land is as a whole! There is a giant pumpkin with haunted woods inside it! There is a hippo that takes you to space! There is a turtle that swallows you and takes you underwater to a whale! There is a house that is just kind of a normal house but forces you to be really small to enter it! But I probably don’t need to tell you all that! It’s kind of what makes SML2 so wonderful! 

Would YOU live in Mario land? Would you want a monarchy as long as Super Mario is your benevolent ruler? What do you think of the giant turtle? Please let us know what you think of the giant turtle in the comments below. I don’t know. 

[sitp-recs]

Do you know Drarry fics, where Harry is overworked and/or exhausted by his posr war life and Draco is the one who is instrumental in helping Harry? Xo

Hi anon! Sure, these are some of my favorites - I expanded your ask to also include anxious/apathetic/depressed Harry, hope that’s ok :)

Unseen by astolat (M, 11k)

When he wasn’t wearing it, he got jumpy, always waiting for someone to come at him wanting something—and now they did it even more urgently, if they ever saw him, because most of the time, nobody did.

Poor Unfortunate Souls by DoubleApple (E, 19k)

Draco is a potioneer. Harry is trying to save his sex-challenged marriage. Everything is a mess, but at least there's an octopus in the lobby.

Fearful Trill by Vukovich (E, 29k)

Harry should have come out and met someone when he was younger. He should have seen a doctor about the pain in his hip while youth was still on his side. Now, he's made his peace with dying young, but maybe not with dying alone.

This is Never Happening Again by hpleems (M, 32k)

“Potter,” Malfoy said, shaking his head. “Do I look like I care about your holiday plans? Trust me: this is *never* happening again.”

Open For Repairs by FeelsForBreakfast (M, 35k)

After the war, Draco works at a tv repair shop and Harry breaks things.

Touch by bixgirl1 (E, 45k)

When Harry is referred to a professional cuddler for the soothing power of touch, he’s dubious — even more so when the Cuddler who shows up turns out to be Malfoy. But in the years since the war, Malfoy’s changed, and over the next several days Harry is confronted by how much he still doesn’t know about this new version of his old enemy — and by how much he wants to learn.

In The Red by bixgirl1 (E, 45k)

When Harry goes looking for a vampire at a Creature club, the second-to-last thing Harry expects is to find Malfoy working there.

Unseen by Jackvbriefs (T, 47k)

Harry Potter finally has the chance to leave England and its expectations for The Chosen One behind for good. All he has to do is survive one Auror training conference overseas with Draco Sodding Malfoy.

Here's The Pencil, Make It Work by ignatiustrout (M, 49k)

Harry thinks "Why is Malfoy working in a coffee shop in muggle London?" is a much simpler question than, "Are you going to accept that auror offer and, if you don't, what will you do?"

Meet Me at Midnight by thestarryknight (T, 57k)

Harry was beginning to wonder if he’d ever make anything again when Malfoy stormed through the door of Harry’s furniture shop. Now Harry’s got an impossible Ministry commission to finish, and even less energy than ever to deal with his elusive muse. That is, until he stumbles upon the surreal and beautiful world of a mysterious fae creature…

Modern Love by tackytiger (E, 61k)

Harry Potter, of all people, knows that life isn’t always fair. And no one gets to be happy all of the time. But surely there’s something more—something better—than a rubbish Ministry job, and a lonely old house, and that feeling that everyone out there is doing a better job of living than Harry is.

The Way Down by lettered (T, 65k)

Harry is overwhelmed by his own power and fame and angst, so he's become a hermit. Draco Malfoy is tired of the melodrama.

Harry Potter and the elusive day off by pleasebekidding (E, 71k)

Auror Potter needs a fucking break. He is wiped. He is exhausted. He probably didn't intend to put himself into a magical coma but these things happen. And who cares, really? He is comfortable in a house where he has hidden away all the shit he can't deal with.

Kept in Cages by sweet_s0rr0w and art by ihopeyoubothstaysafefromharm (E, 76k)

Deep in the heart of the Ministry lies the Beast Division: a hidden room where ancient beasts roam, and winged creatures soar, and grumpy giant ferrets eat all your biscuits unless you keep them well hidden. Draco Malfoy would know – he’s been working there for five years now, after all.

I Am Not Who I Became by mab_di (E, 93k)

Draco left England after the trials and has travelled the world meeting wizards and Muggles from different cultures and with vastly different relationships to magic, each other, and the natural world. Now he's a fisherman in Finland on commercial vessels. Harry has been struggling since the war and has become a recluse while trying to write his autobiography. An invitation to the Hogwarts class of 1998's 15th reunion isn't welcomed by either of them, but neither could predict how the night, and their reunion, will upend their lives.

The Liars Department by DorthyAnn (T, 103k)

This is a story about Harry meeting up with Draco Malfoy four years after the war. And a story about Harry, well, not hating his job per say, but it's not like he has much to compare it to and it seemed fine. His whole life seemed fine. Then Malfoy came along with and his flashy suits and fast car making everything seem dull in comparison, and Harry... Harry couldn't just leave well enough alone.

What We Pretend We Can't See by gyzym (M, 131k)

Seven years out from the war, Harry learns the hard truth of old history: it’s never quite as far behind you as you thought.

Any Instrument by dicta_contrion (E, 131k)

Draco Malfoy wouldn't go back to England for anything less than an exceptional case. Being asked to figure out why Harry Potter can't control his magic might be exceptional enough to qualify.

where all the veins meet by eight_of_wands (E, 146k)

It's the summer of 1998. The battle is over, and Voldemort is dead, but Harry still has more questions than answers. Who is he without a piece of Voldemort's soul in his head? What is he supposed to do now?

[sonicman66]

Gf is succeeding in dragging me into TWST and naturally my brain immediately thinks of crossovers bc it has one mode only

Sora from KH in TWST for tldr

Sora as Yuu. He'd be so perfectly horrible for NRC, everyone and their grandma would call him the 'Royal Sword wannabe' or something. He'd shittalk each of the seven founders (except the pomes, bc he never met the Evil Queen, so maybe they hate him a little less), and he's so goddamned reckless. Instead of someone getting thrown at the chandelier to break it, he'd use flowmotion and just being it down himself, and then wonder why the magic crystal breaks from his assault.

But mainly the sheer amount of Situations his heart can drag him into. Its canon that other versions of characters that have interacted with Sora can gain memories of him (Rinzler in DDD), and I know that the characters Aren't the people they're twisted from, but its so fun to imagine most everybody being completely wary of this smiling reckless idiot bc their past life is screaming that this dude Fucking Killed Them.

Riddle gets pissed as hell, because he has no respect for the rules (and he can undo Off With Your Head bc that lock has a giant fucking keyhole lads you do the math) and also he has vague inkling of this fucker being rude to him. Leona has an instinctive disdain for this herbivore, and he reminds him too much of Cheka, and it wigs him out (also Ruggie's entire being screams 'FLEE' around him). He doesn't take Azul's scheming seriously, and shows up underwater WITH A FUCKING MER TAIL (Floyd and Jade get one or two shouts out before they get bonked into submission)

Hornton is wary of this child of man for some reason. But he's so kind! And friendly, and open!

Silver walks in on Sora's dreams and finds sora with a turtle and a nightmarish octopus battling Azul in a black dress whilst Floyd and Jade swim around with their heads copypasted onto Flotsam and Jetsam in a reenactment of the Ursula's Revenge song and swears off acknowledging his existence.

I unno, it could be fun!

[myths-tournaments]

Awful Characters Round 1 Part 2 (3/8)

Propaganda under the cut!

SANDER COHEN

In the novel, he made a guy fuck an octopus. Yes. A literal octopus. He also tortured people with his great “pal” by first doing stuff like burning their bodies and then freezing them to see their faces. Also he just, plastered in bodies. He also helped with a child trafficking ring that was one of the main sources that caused little orphaned girls to become little sisters. Bro took be gay and do crime but didn’t so silly things like, rob a bank, become a mafia member. His crimes would made it so they would’ve invented a new form a punishment for him. Believe it or not, the only reason he was never punished was because he was in a city underwater the whole time. Why do I like this horrid man? I don’t know. I just do. Maybe because he has one of the best stages in bioshock.

ZABUZA

He is a super cool and skilled fighter. I love his relationship with Haku (platonically in canon, nothing else is stated at least, Haku is like 15 years old and Zabuza is 26 y.o., fandom can be quite nasty about the Zabuza & Haku topic, no matter what one says or what ones head-canons are) He has a badass big giant sword. He has a cool design and outfits. I like that his mask is basically just bandages, and sometimes he wears cow pattern! A grown-up man who unironically wears visible cow patterns! Gotta love it! His techniques are also pretty cool. He uses water elements. I love water! He can conjure up fog and envelop the wider area around him in thick mist. He has also water attacks like water dragon bullets or waterfalls. He can conjure clones of himself from water and make prisons of water were he can keep enemies. Zabuza's academy were he trained to be a ninja made death matches to determine capable fighters. After killing hundreds of fellow students, he was, yes, the most capable fighter (after that they stopped this practice). He became known as the Demon of the Hidden Mist (Hidden Mist is the name of his village). He was against the government of his village and wanted to fight against it, unfortunately he was betrayed by his fellow fighters D: He had to flee from the village, during which he met a boy, Haku, who became parentless because of the turmoil. At first Zabuza did not want to have anything to do with him, but Haku somehow stuck to him. He then trained the boy to become a mercenary like him. After all these events, Zabuza's life spiralled downhill and he lost the focus and his big dreams. In the end, the boy Zabuza had half-raised was not only a weapon for him, but the person closest and most important to him and Zabuza was allowed to die next to him (Haku died before Zabuza to protect Zabuza).

[maskedteaser]

hii i just saw the rdr2 matchups you did and i love them AND HOLY SHIT APEX FAN‼️‼️ i love how detailed you are!! love your writing!! so if ur not too overwhelmed with requests id like to make one :3 and honestly if ur doing matchups for apex id love that too there's so little apex ffs, especially x reader </3 no pressure tho!!

anyways as for me. uhh. i don't use labels (aside from being asexual) but am pretty masculine in gender, and my love is for any gender. my pronouns are he/him :3

more about me,, im vegetarian, my favorite animal is the octopus, im chronically ill & disabled, which means i have chronic pain and have pretty bad sleep (literally writing this at 10 am after not being able to sleep all night) but despite that i have a weird paradox where i am kinda strong? like i can pick ppl up. but can't have much activity for a long time lest i cast spell 200 bpm on myself. but for the sake of the ff i could totally bench press arthur morgans 180lb of pure muscle. its true <3

in apex i main wattson and bloodhound! but i also like crypto, octane ofc (who doesn't), loba, and... im sorry.. wraith 😭 i got wattsons heirloom after. a very long time of opening packs AND I LOVE IT SO MUCH no regrets!! french girl with giant nessie plush!!!!! tho i haven't played in forever (and honestly may keep it that way with how much they're nerfing bloodhound.. like.. c'mon man.. not my main.. they've already been nerfed so much 😭)

i recently started playing rdr2 cause im visiting family that has it (theres actually been a lot of funny stories being on an unfamiliar console, like playing 22+ hours and reaching chap 2 without knowing how to save.. and i didnt know how to tell arthurs weight so i kept him underweight for so long my poor starving man </3) after playing rdr1 quite a bit. i also vibed with john hard in 1 but i lowkey thought he was an angsty young adult in rdr2 and not a FATHER. my favs are arthur and javier tho i can barely see the latter cause where tf is he on the map?? same with charles where IS HE??? but anyways i also vibe so hard with kieran.

tho i could talk forever about my interests, other than that for personality: id describe myself as actually kinda confident around strangers, i love to compliment ppl i come across. for friends, much of the same, i like using improv as humor if that makes sense, ive been told im easy to talk to, i consider myself intuitive (also contributed to me being a tarot reader i believe), but i am the type to have a veeerryy hard time expressing negative feelings im having, and never crying in front of people, so no shortage of bottling emotions. im also rather rigid on cleanliness and WILL start tweaking if me/my space goes too long w/o cleaning. i really, really care about people (i would want to be a paramedic!! if my body could allow it..) and i so want to make peoples lives better!! but also can rather easily stop people from walking over me, should they try. i care about kids a lot, and get very peeved when other ppl dont know how kids brains work and mistreat them because of such, and cause they just have no respect for children. honestly with thinking like.. about formulating matchmaking requests i never really seem to think about what id want out of a person. honestly, just when someone cares (wow, such high standards) but should the time come, mmmost times im not afraid to make a selfish ask. most. maybe. sometimes. and im very, very empathetic and it SUCKS i take psychic damage every time someone even remotely, even HYPOTHETICALLY feels bad. this is not a virtue.

for hobbies, i like to play video games as you may have guessed, i also like to read (non fiction, classic lit and danmeis especially), make art of all kinds but mainly physical sketches, and im always looking to add more shows/movies to my watched list.

i love to visit restaurants and cafes and interesting places surrounding food!!! my idea of a good time is eating with people, even if its in a crappy chuck e cheese. i love to try new foods (but it's a bit hard since becoming vegetarian), and i love matcha! i also love visiting just interesting places in general. why go to disney when you can see a beautiful spot in nature, or an art exhibit, or a park, or just the lively downtown? but other than that, i love my dedicated space 💗

i dont like rude people. mean people. people mean to kids and animals. bigots. assholes. any synonym for that. but honestly, not much else. there are other things that sure tick me off but can be pretty easily taken care of or compromised for.

i hope i didnt write a damn essay. half of it was geeking out over interests but. im guessing the brainrot is shared. but thank you so much for even reading my request this far!! (*˘︶˘*)

hii! sure thing! i love doing matchups especially when you guys give me lots of details :) let's get to it :) THIS IS NOT PROOFREAD!!! I'M REALLY SORRY FOR ANY MISTAKES!!!

okay, first things first - let me tell you why I didn't choose other characters :)

❝ im chronically ill & disabled, which means i have chronic pain and have pretty bad sleep ❞

Well, I need to be honest with you, I believe that despite your strenght, REVENANT would just make fun of your disability, he would NOT care at all, he'd probably pick on you and be REALLY rude. I hope it's not offensive (i'm sorry if i'm insensitive, it's not my intention), but I know he'd want to offend you. You could actually have a good hate-ship (if you know what i mean), where the only thing you guys do is fight with each other but I don't think that's what you want.

❝ im also rather rigid on cleanliness and WILL start tweaking if me/my space goes too long w/o cleaning. ❞

I'm sorry, have you seen OCTANE'S room? Let me remind you of that...

Can you see what is happening on his floor? This guy would probably drive you insane with how messy he is and I know he wouldn't care if you tried to ask him to clean it up... It would probably lead to many arguments and fights between you :(

❝and im very, very empathetic and it SUCKS i take psychic damage every time someone even remotely, even HYPOTHETICALLY feels bad. this is not a virtue. ❞

I have this feeling that Loba would see you as an easy target to manipulate, she'd think that she could use you after seeing that you feel really bad when someone feels bad, so she'd probably talk about her past a lot around you - trying to make you feel like you need to help her with everything. I doubt that it could work out :( I hope you see my vision and I'm not weirdly delusional with my ideas.

BUT NOW FOR A RESULT... (NGL I HAD A BIG PROBLEM WITH THIS ONE SINCE YOU SEEM TO BE A GOOD MATCH FOR AT LEAST 2 LEGENDS, BUT I DECIDED TO PICK...)

VANTAGE

I feel like you and Vantage could have a really good relationship! You both seem to aim high with your ideals and I just think that you both are really empathetic, a little bit emotional even... You share the love for animals. She has her Echo and she'd probably die for him. Vantage would never let any animal be mistreated when she's watching.

" why go to disney when you can see a beautiful spot in nature, or an art exhibit, or a park, or just the lively downtown? " - I think she thinks exactly the same! She seems to be a big fan of nature and she is an explorer. Born on a cold planet where everything wanted to kill her, she knows that nature can both be beautiful and deadly. She is also really nice, and I think that when she gets closer to someone, she actually CARES, like...A LOT. You'd probably be treated really well. I think that Vantage would be really patient when it comes to you and expressing your feelings, she'd never let you just walk away if she saw that you were upset, I think that communication and trust is a priority in every relationship.

She'd listen to you when you tell her that you have chronic pain and she'd do exactly the things you ask her to do, always trying her best to help you and she'd make sure you're not pushing yourself too hard.

Thank you for reading 👽👽👽

[shwoo]

I thought since I like Bugsnax so much, I should probably play the developer's previous game, Octodad as well. And I did, like last August according to Steam. But now I've finally mustered up the energy to make a rambly post about what I thought! Sort of mustered up the energy. Just in time for Dadliest Catch's tenth anniversary in a couple of days (On the 30th of January).

Wait, it's been two days since I started this post. Um, just in time for Dadliest Catch's tenth anniversary.

I played the original 2010 game first, and I knew it was a student project, so I was surprised it had voice acting. Looks like the school also gave them a voice acting budget? That's cool. I was also surprised that a game from 2010 still worked fine, although it did crash the first time I tried to go into the kitchen. So I just did some kitchen chores in real life instead. Showed that… video… game.

The game will save if you save and quit, but not if it crashes, so I started quitting after every task, and then ended up having to do the basement and post-basement sequence like three or four times. At least once it was because Octodad got stuck on some geography. Luckily there is a checkpoint if you die there. I know this because I died repeatedly.

The original game was pretty fun, except for the bit where you have to stomp on all the spiders before they reach your daughter's bed and if you let too many through, the chef guy kills you. Which is just the usual game over, but it is funny that he apparently kills you for failing to protect your daughter properly. Anyway, the controls aren't really precise enough to aim your feet properly.

I did like the gameplay in the basement, though, even though it was a big jump in how precise you have to be. But it is a bit weird plot-wise, even with a game that's obviously not supposed to be that consistent. It seems like everything is wrapped up, and then you go through a random hallway of lasers, and chef guy is there and kills you if you walk into the lasers too many times? And then you get through it and the game just ends.

Another thing that surprised me in both games was how often they acknowledge that Octodad is an octopus. I was already familiar with the meme of people responding to Octodad pictures by asking why someone posted a picture of a perfectly normal dad, to the point of never even saying the word octopus, but in the they say it all the time in the game. He is an octopus in a suit, and he knows this. So does chef guy. A giant Pacific octopus, probably, but I found that subtitle in the game files and I'm not sure if it's in the game, because it would only be said if you get caught by the biologists, and doesn't make a lot of sense in context anyway. I should probably check at some point.

Anyway, I liked Dadliest Catch a lot. I've played through it three times now! I like the characters. Like the Bugsnax characters, they seem to have their own point of view and motivations, while still living in an absurd setting.

And I'll usually reference whatever I'm currently obsessing over when playing something else, but I really overdid it with this game, since they were made by most of the same people. Is the reason I like Scarlet specifically because, being a passionate journalist who believes in aliens and hates being lied to, she reminds me of one my seven favourite characters from Bugsnax? Maybe! Probably.

She's better at identifying parasites, though. But the Bugsnax journalist is better at identifying cephalods. Which was another time I was surprised to hear Octodad being referred to as an octopus, since I hadn't played the games when I saw the crossover April Fools trailer. They just came out and said it.

(Pulls down conspiracy chart) Now let me explain the minutae of why Filbuddy = ...Do Scarlet and Octodad have a ship name? If so, I hope it's Octoscar. Filbuddy with a bit of Snorplo with the "one of them is keeping huge secrets from the other because he's afraid of rejection but the other one is more upset about the secret-keeping than what the secret turns out to be" thing.

Gameplay wise, Octodad:Dadliest Catch is kind of... a little too short to really take advantage of its mechanics? But I hear when it came out, they apparently threw you into difficult stealth sections when most of the challenge beforehand was just getting him to go where you need him to. They left in some of the late game stealth sequences when they updated it, as an optional thing, and I did them on my second playthrough. It was pretty fun, now that I was more used to the controls. Trying to navigate the environments for all the ties was fun as well. He's pretty mobile for someone who shouldn't be able to walk on land at all.

I also liked the optional 2D platforming level you can find by flushing yourself down the toilet. I'd play a whole game like that, if the mechanics were introduced a bit more slowly. The last bit took a while to get through, though.

One of the biggest problems I had with the game was not being able to move the camera. It made it a bit hard to see things in detail, and I had more trouble than I should've with the ship level because I didn't realise a beam extended all the way to the middle of the ship, and I could walk on it. I thought I was meant to sneak past all the sailors.

I died there so many times.

Also, there are some jokes and stuff that you can't really see because they're too far from the camera. Like, early on Scarlet says that she send a picture to a tabloid or something that she says made the front page, and she suggests picking it up because she can't be seen reading it. And you can find it in the supermarket, but I couldn't get it close enough to the camera to see what the front page image was without going into the files.

Luckily, a lot of the files are just sitting there easily accessible, like with Bugsnax, so it was pretty easy to find. It's a picture of Octodad sitting and drinking coffee, with the headline "Alien Life Sighted?" There's a few lore kind of things that I don't think you can see in the game either, and it actually answered a few questions I had, about the aquarium especially. Also, I learned Sports Johnson's real name (Maxwell "Sports" Johnson), and what year the game takes place in (1971).

I have a lot of thoughts about the lore, and I think there's more going on, particularly with the aquarium, Octodad having human kids, and the Cod Wars setting in the flashback, but this isn't really the post for it. It's long enough already. Anyway, pretty fun game!

Also, you can see Octodad as a metaphor for disability in general, but he has a weird sleep schedule, basically can't function without coffee, is "usually so talkative", and is so scared of rejection that he never told his wife what species he was. Octodad: ADHD icon?

[jdgo51]

Run Toward the Roar

Today's inspiration comes from:

Roar Like a Lion

by Levi Lusko

Editor's note: One of the great privileges of parenting, grandparenting, and being an auntie or uncle is sharing your faith with little ones. A great way to do that is to read devotions together and pull out the Bible! Devotionals for kids are some of our most popular! Enjoy this one and share with your favorite kids.

"'I am the Lord your God, who holds your right hand, and I tell you, ‘Don’t be afraid. I will help you.’" — Isaiah 41:13 NCV

"'When you hear the word lion, you might think of a big, fuzzy mane or super-sharp claws. Then, of course, there’s that whole “king of the jungle” thing. But chances are, the first thing you’ll think of is its roar.

A lion’s roar is big and loud and really scary. Especially if you happen to be a cute little gazelle trotting across the African plains. Just hearing that sound will send a gazelle running as far away from the roar as possible. Which is the worst thing it could do!

Why? Because that roaring lion isn’t where the most danger is. The real hunters are the lionesses, hiding in the tall grass behind the gazelle. You see, the lion’s job is to creep out in front of the gazelle and ROOAARR! — making it turn around and run right into the middle of all those lionesses. Gulp!

As crazy as it sounds, the safest thing for the gazelle is to run toward the roar.

That’s true for you too. When you run from the things that scare you — like trying something new, standing up for what’s right, or telling someone about God — you actually move closer to the danger. That’s because you’re moving closer to what the devil wants you to do and farther away from what God wants you to do.

Facing your fears is the best thing to do. And guess what! You’re not some cute little gazelle surrounded by lions and lionesses. You’re a child of God, and you’re always surrounded by Him. He’ll help you face your fears. Trust Him. Be brave. And run toward the roar!

GET READY TO ROAR!

"Is something roaring in your life right now? Something you’re afraid to do? Maybe it’s trying out for the team, singing a solo, or inviting a friend to church. Or maybe it’s standing up to that older kid and telling him to leave the little kids on the bus alone. What’s the first step you could take to run toward the roar? Talk to God about it, and then run.

Dear God, when fear is roaring at me, please give me the courage to run toward the roar. Amen. Facing your fears is the best thing to do.

CRAZY FEAR

I asked the Lord for help, and He answered me. He saved me from all that I feared. — Psalm 34:4 ICB

Some fears are perfectly logical. For example, if you take a step outside and see a giant, growling grizzly bear charging down the street and headed straight for you, it makes sense to be afraid. You might wonder how this huge, hairy beast happened to be on your street, but being afraid of it would be perfectly reasonable.

Other fears aren’t so logical. Like me and spiders. I hate those guys. In my head, I know I’m like a zillion times bigger than they are. I could squish one with my little toe — covered in a massive steel-toed boot, of course. But when I see a spider, all I can think about are those eight creepy little legs crawling up my arm. I know my fear is crazy, but if I see a spider, I’m outta here. And don’t get me started on snakes!

Maybe you have a crazy fear too. Maybe it’s a fear of numbers — which, by the way, is called arithmophobia. Or maybe it’s just the number eight — octophobia. Maybe you’re afraid of heights or speaking in front of people. Just because your fear seems crazy doesn’t mean you aren’t afraid.

But don’t let fear keep you from experiencing everything God has planned for you. Sure, there may be spiders in that cabin, but I’m not missing that camping trip. Don’t you miss out either — on riding the tallest roller-coaster ride, telling people about Jesus, or even visiting the octopus exhibit at the zoo. Give your fears — crazy or not — to God, and He’ll help you be brave.

DID YOU KNOW?

Some people aren’t just reasonably scared of bears; they are terrified of all kinds of bears. This fear is called arkoudaphobia.

I have no idea how to pronounce it, but I do know it means a fear of all kinds of bears — whether they’re angry grizzly bears, wandering black bears, or cute and cuddly panda bears. It even describes people who are afraid of teddy bears!

Lord, I don't want my fears — real or crazy — to keep me from all You have planned for me. I will trust You to help me be brave. Amen."'

Excerpted with permission from Roar Like a Lion by Levi Lusko, copyright Levi Lusko.

[batik96]

Tagged! Reading edition

I was tagged a few weeks ago (sorry for the delay) by @hedwig-dordt to offer up my current, recent and future reads. Thanks!

Current: "The River We Remember" by William Kent Krueger. It's a book club book. I haven't made it far. Even though it's set in Minnesota rather than North Carolina, it feels very "Mayberry," right down to the book's version of Otis, the jailed drunk who tends to come and go as he pleases. It's a mystery/police procedural with issues of race and prejudice, and at least one character is LGBTQ+. I feel as if I could enjoy the story -- I do love a good mystery/police procedural -- but Krueger's descriptions of the town and its people simultaneously feel spot-on accurate, somewhat stereotypical and way overdone. Maybe it's fic's influence -- that general understanding that the reader knows a lot of the details and doesn't need them repeated -- but, in a book in which the murder victim is found floating in a river, I feel as if I'm drowning in detail about every blade of grass lining the riverbank. I know fic tends to shortchange the scene-setting at times, but scaling back isn't always a bad thing.

Recent: "Remark Bright Creatures" by Shelby Van Pelt. Another book club book, this is easily the most charming non-fic tale I've read in years. At the heart of the story are Marcellus, a giant Pacific octopus living at an aquarium in the Pacific Northwest, and Tova, the older widow who befriends him after taking a night job cleaning the aquarium. In the first few chapters, you'll wonder how anything connects. By the end, well ... I wish there were a lot more books this well-constructed and charming. It didn't just make me smile; it made me happy. (Don't be surprised if you absolutely fall in love with Marcellus! I swooned.)

Future: "Fourteen Days," edited by Margaret Atwood and Douglas Preston. This novel was written by more than two dozen authors (including Tumblr's own @neil-gaiman), built around a framework premise of apartment building tenants who are trapped inside and bored during the early days of the pandemic and begin meeting on the building's roof each night -- socially distanced, of course -- to tell stories. My understanding is the authors wrote individual chapters involving the tenants' stories and Atwood and Douglas constructed the framework around them to build the larger tale. I'm looking forward to seeing how the individual writers' styles vary and how they fit together to create the whole. (The premise feels very much like a challenge the Sherlock fandom would have tackled back in the day.)

I'm not entirely sure who's still hanging out in these parts on a regular basis, but ... I'd love to hear from ... @thetimemoves, @cemm1966, @perpetuallyvex, @writingfanficsfan and anyone else who sees this and would like to share! (Please tag me so I'll be sure to see your post!)

[mintbushcat]

Ok so like I’ve seen a couple of twst pokemon aus and I wanted to make one too lol so I decided to list the characters and then give them a main partner based on the type I think fits best, there’s 22(?) boys so there’s gonna be 4 types that repeat. Some of them have evolved pokemon and some of them don’t, I was just kinda looking at what I think fits best.

Heartslabyul

Riddle: Fire-Flareon

I think fire fits him best? Red hair, bad temper and he’s seen using fire magic a good amount of time. I gave him flareon just bc I think the design compliments him the best.

Trey: Normal-Chansey

I really wanted to give him like alcremie or dachsbun but I think normal fits him better than fairy? Also i picked chansey bc Trey is a baker and I assume he’s uses a lot of eggs ahdhsj, also chansey is a caretaker kinda like the role Trey plays

Cater: Fairy-Sylveon

Cater wants likes on magicam and takes cute photos to get that so I think he’d be drawn to the cute fairy types even though he may not like it too much bc of his sisters; sylveon are very in tune with their trainers though so I think they help each other

Deuce: Steel-Togedemaru

His like big move is summoning cauldrons(giant metal things lol) and he’s trying to move away from his delinquent pass so I don’t think he’d want a bunch of fighting types, I chose steel bc it also makes me think of knights and he’s trying to be an honor student, someone his mom can be proud of so I think steel fits that noble image. I gave him a pika clone bc he’s more of a main character and I also think it fits him

Ace: Dark-Morpeko

I know his best magic is wind magic but I think dark fits his personality better, he’s mischievous and playful, he’s described as easy going but he can get mean and serious if need be. morpeko kinda shows how 2 faced he was when we first meet him and I gave him a pika clone too so 1) he could match w deuce lol and 2) bc he’s also one of the more main characters

Savannaclaw

Leona: Ground-Garchomp

Ground should be obvious lol, I chose garchomp bc I think a pseudo legendary fits a prince who can’t become king. Since it’s part dragon type it has a rivalry with malleus and his partner (most likely one sided tbh)

Ruggie: Dark-Zorua

Like ace I feel it really fits his personality. A mischievous pranker that also steals just fits the dark type. Zorua is mischievous and they enjoy playing pranks on people w their illusion ability

Jack: Rock-Rockfuff

Maybe it’s a bit of a cop out but I was gonna give Leona a pyroar and couldn’t so I decided to give the obvious choice to jack. Jack is always trying to get stronger and he’s real reliable which makes me think of the rock type and like I couldn’t not give the mon that turns into a werewolf to Jack that would be a horribly missed opportunity

Octavinelle

Azul: Water-Spheal

He doesn’t want people to know he’s an octopus so I don’t think he’d want an octo pokemon, he mentions that his home is super cold so I gave him spheal as a reference to that, I also think he’d try and lure in customers with them since they’re so cute and marketable

Jade: Bug-Parasect

I had this whole thing written with the repeats but I realized at the end if I wanted to make jade poison w a foongus like I had originally that would have left lilia with the bug type 😆, so jade goes from poison to bug which I still thinks fits really well esp with parasect, he enjoys hunting for mushrooms which means he must enjoy the outdoors so he can’t mind bugs too much right 🤨

Floyd: Fighting-Clobbopus

I think Floyd would have one to annoy azul, he also likes to squeeze people and so maybe one day if he evolves clobbopus he’ll have someone to squeeze with lol. Due to his sometimes violent nature I think he can handle fighting types

Scarabia

Jamil: Psychic-Indeedee

His whole mind control thing and being kinda two faced makes the think of the psychic type. I was gonna give him drowzee or gothorita but thought the former was too creepy and the latter would also make a great fit but I couldn’t pass up the butler/ babysitter gimmick, it can be a male or female indeedee btw either works I think

Kalim: Flying-Togetic

With 22 boys and 18 types there can be 4 repeats so while ground and water were both good options imo there are other types I feel need a repeat so I had to get a little creative, Kalim is a happy go lucky kind of guy which fits togetic and the flying type can be seen as reflective of his easy going nature, he loves going for rides on his flying carpet which may be a reach but I like to think he enjoys the skies and likes mons that can take him there

Pomfiore

Vil: Poison-Salazzle

I feel the poison is self explanatory and salazzle I think is the most fabulous poison type lol, he takes her on all his photo shoots and carpet walks

Rook: Ghost-Greavard

I feel a hunter needs a dog and greavard is known for its loyalty, I chose ghost bc he’s in the business of killing lol, I would have picked steel or fighting but I didn’t want more than 2 repeats for 4 types so oof, sorry if it seems it doesn’t fit I think it does

Epel: Fighting-Mienfoo

Epel wants to be seen as manly so I think he’d want some jacked pokemon, I picked mienfoo bc they’re known for their agility and graceful fighting and I think that would conflict with epels idea of manliness letting them grow together lol

Ignihyde

Idia: Ghost-Phantump

He opens a gate to hell to revive his dead kid brother, I think phantump fits pretty well lol and the ghost type again ties into the whole being based on the god of the underworld thing

Ortho: Grass-Leafeon

The grass type I think is similar to life and growth and ortho wants to start learning more about human emotions so I picked it, it might not be the best pick but I would have had too many repeats of typing so again I kinda made it a stretch and also I feel the fire specialty is kinda too on the nose? Idk I wanted something different

Diasomnia

Malleus: Dragon- Dracozolt

Malleus is like one of the strongest mages so he gets a legendary I think that’s fair?? The only other non mega non legendary electric dragon type is dracozolt and I really really really want sebek to have it, I know this repeats a dual typing but 🤷‍♀️, you can’t tell me sebek wouldn’t leap at the chance to share a typing w malleus lol. He is somewhat unaware of Leona’s rivalry w him lol

Sebek: Electric- Dracozolt

I kinda already explained why last post but I also think it fits sebek bc he’s half human half fairy and dracozolt is a combination of fossils so I think they relate to one another

Lilia: Poison-Zubat

Lilia is based on a bat so that fits, I had no idea what I wanted Lilia to specialize in so I had to change jade from poison to big but I think that worked out bc I feel you can make a good reasoning for Lilia and the poison type

Silver: Steel- alolan sandshrew

Ok so like I didn’t want to give him honedge bc again I think it’s a bit on the nose and like it’s kind of a creepy mon which is fine but I wanted something that fit the typing and was related to his ability to attract little woodland creatures lol

[dollsonmain]

It's early morning so guess what.

Blathering time.

I'll be alone most of the day today. The first showing of Son's play is tonight, and That Guy isn't coming back to the house after work, he's just going straight there. I'll go to the noon-ish showing tomorrow.

Maybe I can also get to the hospital to get my blood draw tomorrow morning, since they're open 7am to noon. Doubt it. I do want to get that done sooner rather than later because it takes time to get to the lab and be processed and I'd rather have the test complete before my follow-up with the urologist.

Lempo and Daymare spoilers:

Watching Lempo I was having a little trouble following exactly what had happened and it wasn't explained. I had a pretty good idea but didn't want to assume.

Both games are exploration and puzzle solving. Daymare also had combat. Pew pew.

After watching Daymare, I'm pretty sure they're basically the same story from different people's perspective. In Lempo it's an office worker who's office happened to be near a secret laboratory, and in Daymare it's a military operative that was tasked with infiltrating Area 51.

In both games a meteor fell to earth that had weird metal in it that the government took for experiments.

In Lempo it apparently happened relatively close to when the game takes place, and in Daymare it was probably hundreds of thousands of years in the past. Either way, it was found and experimented on.

Lempo is a pulsing metal cube that didn't seem to do much other than obliterate anyone standing near the cube during a pulse and once the PC turned off some electrical currents that were affecting the cube and making it pulse, they were able to open segments of it and take stuff out. Daymare is a mysterious metal with unique electromagnetic properties that allow for teleportation between meteor chunks. One chunk was at Area 51 and another was under the antarctic ice.

In Lempo it's not explained whether Lempo, the creature that was slowly devouring every living thing, came from the meteor or was awakened by it, but Lempo started mind controlling people which threw them into a sort of religious fervor, and in Daymare they accidentally teleported a giant octopus from another planet into a holding tank in the facility that... started mind controlling people which threw them into a sort of religious fervor trying to convince whomever it could to let it out of the tank.

Either way, it's funny to me how similar the stories are. I bet there are lots of other very similar stories/games out there with the same premise, too. I know the whole "the gods were really aliens" thing was pretty popular in the early 2000's

[hylianengineer]

*asks about job*

Anon you are my favorite.

Okay, so, I'm a laboratory and field technician in a soil and water science lab.

I love my job so goddamn much. I get to work with fancy machines like the gas chromatograph and spectrometer! (The spectrometer is actually really boring but shhh.) I get to go outside and watch birds while I collect water samples! I am getting paid for this! I get to learn data processing and engineering and wilderness safety precautions and how to explain complex science to people whose careers are Not This.

Also, research labs are chaos and I delight in it. Okay maybe not ALL research labs, I'm informed the chemistry department does not look like this. BUT this is an environmental science lab. It is full is bizarre, deeply nerdy, deeply passionate people. Who do things like eat baked potatoes like apples, improvise experimental setups with mason jars and duct tape, and nickname every instrument either a human name or a Pixar reference. I love them so much I have no words.

Crazy and fun things I've done for this job:

Freezer jenga followed by freezer tetris (had to take all the things out of a the freezer, put them in coolers to keep them cold, defrost the freezer, and put them back in except organized this time. I was delighted by this for no logical reason, my boss thought I was nuts).

Okay you know in scifi movies where they have some weird mystery substance and they put it in a box with gloves attatched so they can work with it without actually touching it? I've done that! Not because of hazardous substances, we just needed to put stuff in jars without exposing it to oxygen. But still! It was cool!

Shopping trip to get food for like half a dozen people for three days (I had weird dreams about being overwhelmed with tortilla chips afterwards, this doesn't sound that crazy but I promise you it felt like it).

Taped plastic tubing to 200+ funels until the boxes we were storing them in overflowed and there was no longer floorspace to walk (AFTER cutting the plastic tubing into 200+ equally sized pieces and stuffing it with ion exchange resin, which is like evil microplastic sand. Between all those things, this took WEEKS. It got really boring).

Dissolved like 10kg of KCl (KCl my behated, its very harmless but hell to get off glassware) in water to make 80 LITERS OF KCL SOLUTION (that's over 20 pounds of solid KCl and over 20 gallons of solution! My coworker and I were sort of laughing hysterically over this entire process because come on! 80 liters! For reference most lab protocols need like, a liter or less of whatever solution.) Fun fact about solid KCl, it tends to stick together into a giant brick. We were chiseling at it with scoops, spoons, whatever was on hand (i really wanted to attack it with a screwdriver but it would introduce dirt into the chemicals so i couldn't) and eventually we got so frustrated we went outside and dropped the thing off a second floor balcony. After wrapping it in like 3 layers of plastic bags because we knew at least one bag was gonna break. This did not actually help much but it was very cathartic.

There was a project once where we had to take sealed mason jars and replace all the air in them with nitrogen gas. Repeatedly. For over a hundred jars. My PI (principle invesitgator, means the scientist in charge of a project and usually a lab) is good at building things, so of course he assembled this manifold thing so we could pump nitrogen through a dozen jars at once. Which was great, except it involved two dozen needles, half of them attatched to flexible plastic tubing so they'd kinda bounce around when you pulled them out of the jars. It looked like a very stabby centipede-slash-octopus monster. Impressively, we only stabbed ourselves a couple times each with this thing (and changed the needles of course, we are aware of the risks of transmitting blood diseases).

Actually one of the craziest things about this job in my opinion is how many fucking needles we work with. You see, we study atmospheric gases. And to do that, we need to transfer gases between sealed containers, which means needles and septa (the rubber things they put on vials so you can poke needles through them). So. Many. Needles. Did you know you can only use a needle four times before it gets too dull? It's extremely noticeable as you're using them - not as they get dull, but when you discard an old needle and get out a new one it is a huge difference. I don't know why I find this so fascinating, but working with needles is honestly so fun. I feel like a mad scientist or something. Also, for the first couple months I kept poking myself on accident so I was just walking around with these pinpricks and papercut looking wounds. It felt a bit like a badge of honor, somehow, like a rite of passage for working in the gas lab. Another thing about needles, if you get scratched with one horizontally instead of stabbed, they look like papercuts. It's weird. Also weird is how good you get after a while at not stabbing yourself.

I think I like working with needles because they're something that used to make me nervous. Not horribly, but I have more than typical anxiety and I get nervous about everything. And yet I am now totally chill about needles, because I work with them all the time. It's... freeing I guess. Maybe empowering, even. I am scared of so many things, but I am not scared of this. Ditto large quantities of acid, once you've had to work with dozens of liters of the stuff you stop being scared of it - this was for the same project as the KCl and yes it was equally ridiculous. Dilute acid, thankfully, but to make dilute acid you have to mix the really concentrated stuff with water. It does not come as dilute acid, that would be too easy. So we spent multiple days in a row diluting acid and soaking things in it, there were plastic boxes full of the stuff on every available counter space with handmade warning labels, it was A Thing™️.

Anyways, I'm a person who's scared of everything, except weird stuff like hydrochloric acid, needles, and wasps. I can blame all three of those things on this job, which I love dearly. I love to learn new things, pretend I'm in a scifi movie, be surrounded by crazy people (affectionate), and apparently overcome my numerous fears. You absolutely did not sign up for this big puddle of feelings, anon, but thank you for inspiring it nevertheless.