#but the fact that they are canonically the only ones that are allowed to be brutally honest with the other with zero retaliation is what i

[aliceinborderlandsquidgame]

We meet again | In-ho x Fem!Reader | PT2

Summary: It was only one night for fun, you never thought you would see him again. Even less in a place like this one.

PT1

Warnings: S2 Spoilers - Canon violence - Pregnant!Reader - Non canon background for In-ho - Use of (Y/N) - Angst - Protective!In-ho - Jung-Bae votes X because I say so -

Sleep came hard for you, after Gi-hun told the rest that players attacked each other last time, when the lights went off it only made you worried more.

It did not help that after the akward exchange In-ho decided to join the group, even if he used that time to also taunt Gi-hun (at least in your opinion), he gave you space and you mentally thanked him.

Jun-hee pierced him with a look only a woman could give, it was like she doubt him and also, she was sure he was in fact the father of your baby, which only made things worse.

During the night your bed shifted when another body took a seat, you moved quickly going to call for help but a hand covered your mouth.

The stoic look from In-ho met you in the dark, even if he was not putting a lot of pressure on your mouth. You did not like it.

You removed his hand and went to lie again, giving him your back but he was determined to talk to you.

"You dont need to talk to me, I just came to make sure you two were safe" He started, you could not see it but his eyes were full of adoration towards you and your belly. "I dont think others will attack us but I still needed to be besides you, if you let me"

You did not give him a response, letting your mind wonder over the dangers that could come, you felt him starting to move, most likely to go but your hand took his.

"Stay" After a small pause you added "Please"

And he was more than happy to oblige.

~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~

The morning came faster than what you wanted. The bed was uncomfortable to say the least, and most part of the night you were cold.

A centrain warm had woke you up but a quick "shh" made you go back to sleep.

You now noticed a extra blanket over you.

"(Y/N), how did you sleep?" Jun-hee asked, she looked like she needed more sleep.

"As best as someone can with this beds" You said knocking on the bed making her let out a small smile.

"Looks like someone is watching over you" She said pointing at the extra blanket.

You made a face at it but nodded, if it was better for the baby then you would allow it.

"We can share it tonight if you want" You offered her who smiled and bowed thanking you.

"Attention players, we will now start the next game. Form a line a follow one guard to the next area" The voice of a Guard filled the room making you nervous to see what was going to happen.

~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~

"This things does not get easier" You whispered to yourself as you claimed the maze of stairs, you had to admit the colors were cute but the energy you needed for them was not something you were looking to use.

What if it was another game with running ? You would need your energy for it. You could not waste it on these dam stairs.

In-ho had positioned himself in front on you and would look back to make sure you were following.

"You can use my shoulder if you need help" He said stopping and almost making Dae-ho hit your back, but he was keeping a distance in case you needed to rest.

"Im fine" You said between hard breaths going to walk again on your own only to feel In-ho's hands around you, making you lean on him so you would use less energy and tired yourself less.

"I dont remember you being such a complicated woman" He whispered to you, making sure no one could listen.

"Well I dont expect you to remember most, we were drunk when we left.."

But In-ho moved his head with a small smile "Trust me, I remember most of it. Our conversation at the bar and the events after we left. I havent been able to stop thinking of these"

A shiver ran down your spine but you ignored it.

"Well I dont believe you, tell me something specific i said that night" You kind of demanded him

"You said how you loved the town, loved seeing the same faces, there was a older woman who lived two blocks from you. She would gift you milk and eggs. You liked seeing the kids play after school and would even take care of some when their parents had to leave for work. You loved that town"

You got quiet, it was true. You had said that, and it was true, you did love the town and its peopel, thats why you had to leave, to protect them.

"Alright, I will admit im impressed" You responded leaving out a small smile "You do have good memory" You noted

"For you ? Yes, yes I do"

~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○

"The next game will be a race of six-legs, players please form teams of five, since we have a odd number one team will have six players in it"

The voice announced

"Could they dont think on doing a different game?" Jung-Bae asked the rest of you "I mean, no hard feelings but would it not be more complicated with one more?"

Gi-hun not so discreetly gave him a hit on his side "Shut up we are six" He said and Jung-Bae blushed in shame. 

"Sorry! I did not mean to say it like that"

"Its fine" In-ho said calming him down "We get it, it may be difficult but we can do it, we have our ex winner with us"

Gi-hun scratched his hair "We did not play this last time, im as lost as all of you" He admitted

"Wow must suck to be you!" The voice of player made all of you look, Player 009 a young male said "Not only are you six but you also have two pregnant woman, talk about bad luck. With the six of you out the price will go up in no time. Well if they count the babys then maybe even more"

Out of instinct your hand went over your belly and the other took the hand of Jun-hee who looked as scared as you.

In-ho took some calculated steps towards the player who seemed to get pale when he finally undertood who he was, the same guy who had break a fight last night with no sweat.

"Hey, why dont you lose yourself like a small rat? And im being unfair to rats to compare them to you" He said tone cold and out of emotion.

The player lost himself in the crowd not wanting to face In-ho.

Butterflies flew in your stomach at his words, even if he was not defending you directly, his protective side made you blush and almost smile.

Almost. You had to supress it since Jun-hee was looking at you like she knew something.

"Well, we should see how we will line ourselfs" Gi-hun said making all of you form a circle, "(Y/N) and Jun-hee will need help so-"

"I can walk fine" Jun-hee interrumped him "I can go in one of the corners, (Y/N) will need more help"

Gi-hun nodded at her "Then, you, Jung-Bae will be next, Dae-ho, (Y/N), In-ho and myself" He ended watching all of you "Does it sound good to everybody"

Before you could protest the voice spooke again

"We will be playing a race of six legs, in order to advance you must complete the following games within five minutes and cross the line. If you dont you will be eliminated"

"Games...what games" You asked to no one as the voice went on

"The games you must complete are ddakji, biseokchigi, gong-gi, jegi, and spinning top, please choose among yourself who will play which game"

"Wait, that means one of us wont have to play" Dae-ho pointed out and all nodded.

"(Y/N) You should stay out of the mini games and focus on following the rest of us" Gi-hun suggested looking at you.

You bited your lower lip, you felt like a burden to them, no only being a extra player but also not being able to play with them.

"No, I can play. If there is a game any of you feel less confident in..."

"I agree with Gi-hun" In-ho interrumped you. "It was difficult for you to claim the stairs, its better if you focus on one thing at time"

"No, that was a bad moment, I can-"

"I also agree" Dae-ho cut you off "I have sisters and saw them pregnant before, its better if you dont move to much or stress"

"Jun-hee its pregnant too and I dont see any of you worried" You said almost screaming

"(Y/N) im less pregnant than you...and I saw it too. You had problems with the stairs, dont worry over me, I can do it"

"Think in your baby" In-ho whispered "Think in our baby" He added in a lowered tone.

"Fine, thanks for your help guys" You said truly grateful.

~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○

The first two teams did not make it

You closed your eyes refusing to look at the dead bodies.

The first team that made it had all of you screaming for them, you even hugged In-ho without noticing.

However he did and hugged you with subtle force, using that chance to touch your belly on its side.

~○~○~○~○~○~○~○

"Remember, focus on breathing and follow us, you can do it" In-ho said to you as your team and other one were the last two to play

"If you need to rest just support yourself on me or In-ho" Dae-ho added giving you a encouraging smile.

And like that the race started.

Jun-hee won easily the ddakji, Jung-Bae nailed it hitting the rock on first try.

When it came to Dae-ho's turn all of them made sure that both you and Jun-hee moved onto the floor slowly.

Your heart was beating fast as you saw Dae'ho play, even if this game was one girls used to play you were never good with it. In fact no one of your young friends used to be.

So your suprise was big and more was your happiness as you saw him complete it on first try.

The six of you advanced, the guard went to give you the spinning top but In-ho took it instead. You swear you saw the guard flinch under his dark stare.

Everybody was hyping him, even you, after all you all got three games in a row nothing could-

And he failed. All of you moved so he could do it again.

Only to trow it towards yours back.

After getting it back he started to have an episode, no wonder feeling nervous because of how much time he was making all of you lose.

"Hey! IN-HO!! Calm down just breath, try with your other hand, we still have time" You said pulling him towards you.

Something flicker in his eyes but you could not understand what it was.

He did as you told him and finally he passed.

The last game was in the hands (or feets) of Gi-hun who almost loses but In-ho's quick thinking saved all of you making your team pass and cross the line.

The celebration was short lived as gunshots were hear, the other team did not make it.

"Its ok, you two are safe" In-ho whispered to you once more before a guard started to take all of you back.

However the place seemed...different ? And by different you mean almost no stairs, did the guards suddendly get a heart ? You would not question it, like you Jun-hee was grateful and smiled at you once you two made it into the room.

~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~

"Cant believe these survived" 009 said with a frown not beliving it.

If the price had a chance on going up it was with the dead of either you or Jun-hee.

"Congratulations on winning this game, we will now calculate the price and proceed on voting"

"I hope we win this time" You told Jun-hee who nodded alongside you.

~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~

"We should use the restroom now that we have a chance" You told Jun-hee who accepted and so both of you left your male companions who themselfs went to their own restroom.

"I cant believe we lost again" You said hitting the door of the stall getting some looks from other circle players but no one said a thing. Maybe they pity you because of your pregnancy but not enough to end the dam games.

"Dont stress too much" Jun-hee tried to comfort you even if herself was scared.

You took some deep breaths to try and calm yourself down, thinking in your baby.

I can do it. I can play again, I must play again.

~○~○~○~○~○~○~○

The six of you reunited once again waiting for the terrible food the guards would most likely give.

"Hey Dae-ho, how were you able to win on first try?" Jung-Bae asked trying to ease the tension since all of you had bothed X

"Well, as I said I grow up with four sisters. And they would play it all the time so I ended up learning a few tricks" He commented

The small talk went towards different topics, nothing too personal just something to pass the time.

You were between Jun-hee and In-ho who had sit closer to you but you did not mind and even invited him to move closer.

"I wish the food its not as bad as the one from last night" You said getting a groan from Jung-Bae

"I miss my meat, I would kill for one piece of well coked meat" When all of you just looked at him he muttered "Sorry bad wording"

"I would love some cake, maybe chocolate cake and...popcorn" You said rubbing your belly

"Its that what they call cravings?" Jung-Bae asked, even if his ex wife was once pregnant he did not really remember much of her time with it.

"Yeah, this is not the worse one" You laughted making In-ho softly smile besides you.

"What was the worse one?" Dae-ho asked curious

"One night at 2 a.m. I woke up crying, I asked my roomate to get me squid and ice cream, she went to the store bless her heart but then I asked her if she could mix it all"

The horror from their faces was priceless.

"I havent had any weird craving" Jun-hee said smiling at your story "They better start once we are out of here"

"Your roomate sounds like a good person" In-ho commented, he was glad you had someone to rely on while he was away and did not know about your pregnancy, he would have loved to be the one to get waked up by you to make him go and buy you different types of food.

"She was" You agreed "She saw me having a hard time and offered me a place to stay so we could divide rent. Thanks to her I was able to get better food. Saddly she had to leave Seoul because her sister needed her"

In-ho was now confused. Seoul? What were you doing in Seoul? Were you not a local in that town? Why did you move? Even when you knew you were pregnant?

He had so many questions but would have to wait till a better moment.

"Players, we will now start serving dinner" A guard say, all of the players went to get in line.

As you waited In-ho stood behind you and used that time to talk to you

"Why were you in Seoul?" He asked confused and worried.

You turned a bit towards him, not wanting everybody to hear your talk "My brother left a debt, escaped the country, and since im the only blood relative alive it fell on me" You explained him. "I would have loved to raise my kid in that town, but the load sharks did track me down and said they would made the town suffer if I did not make monthly pays. I could not put them in danger so I left"

In-ho was furious, not only were you forced to face such a hard time alone. Your excuse of a brother left a debt on you, not caring what your situation was.

You must have been so scared, sad, no women deserves to go by a special time like pregnancy like that.

He was also furious with himself. He should have acted faster and track you down, he would have know sooner you were pregnant and would have make things different. He would have payed that debt, making sure you were well assisted and not lifting a finger, only resting like you deserved.

The guilt was eating him alive.

"Im sorry, I should have been there" He said and for once in the two days that had passed his voice was full of sincerity and vulnerability "Im really sorry (Y/N) you should not have to go by that"

You did not say a thing back, trying to stop the tears that wanted to fall.

"I managed, and its not your fault. I was angry at your for sometime but then I just stopped being angry. It was bad luck"

"It was also back luck that you got yourself pregnant?" He asked now a bit worried about what you thought of it.

You stopped and turned completly to face him.

"No. That was not bad luck at all. Yeah I would have loved to have someone besides me...to have you with me" His heart fell at your words, his mind racing with ideas on how to protect you in the next game "But it was never something bad, I love this baby, I want it to be healthy and to live a good life"

"I will be with you from now on, I promise I wont go anywhere" He said taking your hand in his in a silent promise

"Next" The guard called making you let go of his hand and take the food the guard was giving, before you could go the guard stopped you and gave you a small plastic bag with pills.

You took it not sure what it was.

As you walked towards the group you read it "Vitamins for pregnancy" You almost fell in suprise and walked a bit quicker towards the group but more specific towards Jun-hee who seemed go be waiting for you.

"(Y/N) Did they..." she trailed off showing you the same bag of pills

"Yeah. Do you think they had a change in heart?" You asked taking a seat besides her.

"I dont know but I wont question it" She said opening the cartoon milk and swallowing the pills. You did the same starting to feel better.

"(Y/N), Jun-hee you two can have my milk" Jung-Bae said almost forcing you to take it.

"But-"

"You two can also have mine" In-ho said appearing and giving you his own "Like that you two will have enough energy and your babys will be healthy"

~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~

It was almost time for the lights to go off once again. Jun-hee and You shared a bed in order to share the blankets, the other four insisted that you two rested and that they would keep watch.

When Gi-hun woke up In-ho to take turn he would take some times to glance at you. His heart softening at the sight of your sleepy face and your belly under the blankets.

How much did he want to have you back in his room, in a most comfortable bed. He would have to leave you during the day but would return to cuddle you in the night. Would talk to your belly saying to it just how proud he was, and how happy its existence made him. He wanted to pull his ear against it, try to listen to it or feel it kick.

Soon, he would make sure you survived the next game and will get you out of the games.

~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○

Tags:

@maria-trisha @blueyesuguru @imenekiki @victorie767 @futuristicdefendorfart

Blue = I could not tag you 😞

[sucodelaranja86]

- i'm sorry ( part 1 ) : ★

pairing: hyun-ju cho x reader ☆

summary: waking up in a strange place and being forced to play life or death childhood games was not what you were expecting. What you were expecting even less was to find your girlfriend there. However, her protectiveness comes out in a way she did not mean.

warnings: transphobia, canon violence.

A/N: my first work, please be nice. Requests are open. :)

★ . ★ . ★ . ★

➤ Everyday. Every single hour that passed felt painful. As you walked through the streets, your heart stung like thousands of little glass pieces shattered and made deep cuts inside of it.

You felt dumb, you felt stupid. Seeing couples around the street; kissing, holding hands, taking pictures... It was something you had, but you knew you couldn't get anything more than those simple actions. The feeling reminded you of when you were single, but you had a girlfriend now- an amazing one, that is. So why were you feeling like this, you say?

Your partner, as amazing and flawless as she was (and you reminded her of it every single time), simply couldn't see herself as so. You could kiss her, snuggle her, love her as much as you could, but it wouldn't get past that. She wouldn't allow it.

You were tired, exhausted. All you wanted, all you asked for, your simple wish was for her to see herself as gorgeous as you saw her. Why couldn't you love her in public without her fear of unwanted attention? Why couldn't you give a simple step on your relationship without having to comfort and reassure her for hours over the simple fact that she was, indeed, a real woman?

Both you and her were drowning in debt, but you couldnt shake the painful and dark feeling inside the deepest spots of your heart. So you worked, worked, worked, and worked. Sharing the bills with Hyun-ju, buying food, buying basic home supplies, paying for your faculty... Until you simply couldn't work anymore. If having those surgeries meant that you could finally have a real relationship with her, then so be it. Right?

Your determination was quickly shattered after passing out on the streets and having your wallet and phone stolen. Your worried partner, who came after you on the way to your job after you didn't return home 2 hours later than expected, was relieved that you were unharmed. You got a scolding to rest properly, a warm meal, a prepared shower... Everything was perfect, right?

Except for the fact that you and her just lost 4 months worthy of saving for a damn surgery.

Well, isn't that so great?

"my love, please don't blame yourself. I am not mad at you." her comforting words did nothing to soothe you, and you had a lingering sensation that they only served to make you more feel more anxious.

"i'm sorry, Hyun-ju. I am so sorry- please forgive me."

"Shh. It's alright. I am- i am not mad. I have already said it." her comforting tone that meant to calm and comfort you held an undeniable disappointed tone. You could feel her holding her tears with the knowledge that one of her possible surgeries would undeniably need to wait for an unplanned, extended period of time. And that saddened you even further.

You were the worst.

-

You hold painfully your bruised arm, stumbling across the dark and lone streets. You finally managed to give the final payment of your debt, but they didn't simply let 5 months of delay slide. You were absolutely broke, but you didn't own anyone now.

Anyone but yourself.

What would you say to Hyun-ju once you stepped inside your home? Hey, i lost all our money that we saved for a high step on your transition, but i've managed to clear all my debts!

On the way back home, you were contemplating on what to say or do, when an elegant man approached you. He had a cat-like smirk (that you were sure that held anything but good Intentions), he was dressed in a black suit which didn't possess a single flaw, and had a dark suitcase that matched his entire eerie aura.

As he walked towards you, your path was sealed before you even knew it.

If you could help your girlfriend, anything was worth it. Right?

-

Waking up in a green uniform in a strange place that held multiple people inside a closed dorm was not what you were expecting.

And you know what else you were absolutely not expecting?

"what the hell are you doing here-?!"

Seeing her getting slapped in a big television in front of all the players, and afterwards finding her personally after the first game. What a lovely surprise.

"I- i could be the one asking you this!"

"Didn't you quit all your debts? You shouldn't be-" she was quickly interrupted.

"How do you even know this?!"

"Do you think you can simply hide important things like these from me, and expect me not to know?"

You always hated arguing with her. Mostly because all the time she was right most of the times. She was caring, mature, and all she did was look out for you. But this time, you felt like you needed to get your point across.

"Tell me, and truthfully. Why are you here if you debts are all paid? Are you hiding something from me-" she was, once again, interrupted.

"I just want to help you with your surgeries!"

A ringing and uncomfortable silence was placed between the two of you. You looked down, unable to meet her expression. You couldn't.

"Hyun-ju, i want to-"

"This is none of your business. Step out of my problems like you are my mother. I didn't ask you to come here. I- i never asked you to."

And with that, she left to her bed. Leaving you alone with intruding thoughts and a situation you couldn't resolve on your own.

What could you do?

-

[avelera]

Oh I would love to hear more of your thoughts on Heimerdinger because all of my friends were like "aaw the poor guy, he was right about magic all along, Jayce and Viktor owe him an apology" and I'm like??? Heimerdinger literally does nothing to improve any situation ever! I was so hoping he'd learn his lesson under Ekko, but when he got stranded in an AU and just decided to stay there and permanently take over his other self's body and let his original timeline perish I was genuinely horrified by his complacency (again). TBH I would have really liked to see him confronted with the fucked up culmination of all the fiddling with the Arcane in person, because I think I wanted him to see that he was right, he was right and yet he didn't change anything in the end (I'd even argue that he gets away without facing the consequences of any of his failings, he escapes Jinx' bombs even tho he failed in politics and he escapes the Arcane Apocalypse even tho he failed as a guide to his pupils and Hextech safeguard.)

Heimerdinger is a super interesting character and I'm glad you asked this because the previous meta discussion got me thinking about him but I didn't really know where to begin. I'll try to break my thoughts down with some cohesion:

I do think Heimerdinger learned his lesson within the narrative but specifically with regards to his two demonstrated personal flaws. Heimerdinger's two greatest flaws within the narrative are:

1) A lack of understanding and empathy towards those with shorter lives

2 ) The way his immortality detaches him from actually living his life (which feeds into point 1).

This is going to get long though, so I'm gonna start picking apart what I see as Heimerdinger's flaws and his virtues and how those get addressed beneath a cut:

So as I said, I would argue that Heimerdinger's arc does address his core flaws. His moment of greatest personal cruelty is when he fails to recognize Jayce and Viktor's desperation and, instead of agreeing to help them and guide them to make their experiments safe in the face of their desperation for Viktor to live, he just tries to shut them down. He gets exactly what he deserves there.

Then, in the AU universe, he recognizes this and agrees to help Ekko. He then willingly sacrifices his own life to send Ekko back to the canon universe, where Ekko is instrumental in saving the day. That, I would argue, is Heimerdinger's redemption arc, and he needed a redemption arc.

Also, while he was in the alternate timeline, he learned how to live in the moment, which addresses his second flaw, which feeds into his first flaw. I don't blame him for not feeling urgency to return home, without Ekko, he had no way of doing so. It could be seen as complacency, or perhaps simply an understanding of the reality. Would that world have been a better place if he'd invented Hextech just for a shot at returning to his universe? I'd argue that he was trying to be selfless by not doing so, when we see how much damage Hextech did in the canon universe. I think he was simply at peace with a shitty situation for himself, rather than actively avoiding his responsibilities.

As for the other Heimerdinger, who knows! Was there even one? Do yordles only have one identity across the multiverse? Or was there an element of redemption in Heimerdinger choosing to take his alternate self out of the Council? We just don't know.

As for his political identity, Heimerdinger is super interesting there too. Technically, he's an immortal enlightened despot in Piltover as its founder. I think he hides this fact from himself by allowing a council of humans to sometimes outvote him, in a fig leaf over the fact he really doesn't have the right to govern a bunch of humans, and I think him getting voted out of the Council acknowledges and narratively punishes him for this fact. Piltover isn't as enlightened as he thought it was under his leadership, a fact he realizes when he goes to the undercity and realizes how blind he was. But I'd say those were his flaws, he was always blind and naive, not malicious. And I think the narrative punishes him accordingly by giving him a wakeup call that he was asleep at the helm. He doesn't deserve to be in charge anymore. Jayce was completely right to kick him out BUT, did things get worse without the peaceful, modulating view of Heimerdinger on the council? How would HE have voted for Zaun's independence? I'd be very curious to know.

And I think it should be noted, Heimerdinger does have virtues too! His caution towards Hextech is not only well-founded, he is 100% correct. I think people forget that Heimerdinger was never ambiguous on the subject of where Hextech would lead them, he was completely right that it corrupts, destroys, and lays waste to civilizations. There's no ambiguity there! He's completely correct!

He's also correct that there are scientific innovations that would be safer if they spent more time in testing before being made available to the wider world. It took 100 years for people to realize coal burning factories were measurably altering the world's climate. Another great example of an invention that should have been tested more before it was implemented was freon, which was used in early refrigerators and does measurable damage to Earth's ozone later to the point where it is now banned. What if instead more tests had been run?

Heimerdinger's long view of science is correct and in an ideal world, it'd be great if we could run these tests to their conclusions. However, the long view isn't the whole story, a debate that Arcane actively engages with.

Because it should also be pointed out: the refrigerator also helped improve people's health around to the world. Think of all the food and medicine that can be preserved today because of refrigeration! Literally thousands would have died if we had banned refrigerators until freon could be better studied.

That's kind of where Viktor is at vs. Heimerdinger. If freon-powered refrigerators can end hunger in the undercity, why aren't we applying it now? To which Heimerdinger answers: you don't know what else it might be doing to the world. They are in fact both correct! It's a debate! One the real world is still trying to figure out. Heimerdinger is an extreme case of the long view, and Viktor is an equally extreme case of the short view since he's frantic now that he has so little time to live. Jayce tries to balance the two and gets caught in the middle with everyone mad at him, poor guy.

Anyway, I think that covers most of what I had to say about Heimerdinger? Hope that helps!

[dissvicious]

Alone in Wano - 1 / 2

A/N: it's been an eternity since I posted a fanfic here & I deleted the last one I posted here because I was too self conscious so words can't fathom how much I'm nervous right now lmao. No much content warnings but contain Wano spoilers, canon violence & also apparently it makes people cry. thanks @a-killer-obsession for beta reading, & @wyvernslovecake for letting me play dolls with Shriek ♥

One month.

29 days.

690 hours or so.

Nina sighed, grunting as the baby kicks in her belly kept her from sleeping. She tried to change position in the uncomfortable futon discarded on the ground, to relieve the pressure her womb was applying on her guts - without any effect. She closed her eyes, and, as usual, images of what happened flashed in front of her eyes. Kaido falling in the ground at Ozzy’s birthday party, Kid refusing to submit, the beast pirates destroying the castle and locking everyone in the jails of their ships, sending them to Wano. Quincy, Heat, Wire, Hip, Papas…Thanks to gods, she didn’t see Shriek in the cramped cells. She must have locked herself in her room, just like Nina asked. She silently prayed for her safety and rolled on her back again, looking at the ceiling.

She hadn’t felt this lonely for a long time. Not since she joined the Kid pirates, in fact. She almost managed to believe that life was going to be ok, she almost touched that peace from the tip of her fingers, but Kaido took everything away from her. Nina rubbed her eyes, trying to chase the tears that threatened to flow on her cheeks. One month without Killer tenderly spooning her in her sleep. 29 days without Kid playfully grabbing her ass while passing by in the morning. 690 hours, or so, without passing her fingers through the soft fur of Shriek to untangle it.

"MAMAAAAAAA"

Ozzy’s tears took her out of her reverie. She sat up in the futon, and took the toddler on her lap, before opening her kimono to allow him to latch on her breast and take some milk. She passed her hand through her son’s pink hair, looking down at him tenderly. At least, Kaido didn’t separate them. She was so scared at first, when he discarded them to Orochi, saying that a pregnant chick and a toddler was no use for him. Nina wasn’t strong, she didn’t have any power, she didn’t have haki, and without her chainsaw, the only thing she could do to protect her heir would have been to run and sink her teeth into whatever neck presented to her. Thankfully, Komurasaki seemed to have pity for them and asked Orochi to keep her and Ozzy in her court, which Orochi accepted. Not that he seemed to be able to refuse anything to Komurasaki, though. Nina and Komurasaki immediately understood each other on this - Nina, too, had to pretend to like men for her safety in the past. And staying near the shogun, she could maybe learn a thing or two about Kid or Killer’s fate. Ozzy finished eating and she hugged him tight, seeking comfort in the scent of his hair. God, she missed her lovers so much. Ever since he helped her sober up, she had never been separated from Killer for this long. And as much as it cost her to admit, she missed Kid just as much. After years of being used and tossed away, she finally had a home, a family. She just wanted them back.

Loud screams coming from Orochi's banquet dragged her out of her spiraling. She put back her breast in her kimono and held Ozzy close to her chest, mother instinct going full mode as a little girl with a big grin and pink hair ran to her, crying, holding her close as to seek reassurance in her arms.

“Toko… ?” 

Nina bent down and managed with some effort to take Toko under the arm that wasn’t holding Ozzy, finding, by some miracle, space for the little girl, the toddler, and her big round belly.

“Toko… what happened?” 

Toko looked up at her, unable to answer, her breath cut by a burst of laughter. Nina bit her lip to restrain any reaction that could hurt the girl’s sensibility. Even if Komurasaki explained to her the whole shit about SMILE and its effects, she still needed to process that Toko could have a big grin or laugh, but still be sad, angry or scared. One thing for sure, the more she learned about Kaido, the more she wanted him dead.

As she was about to question Toko again, Komurasaki and Kyoshiro barged in the room. Nina's eyes went wide open and she stood up as she saw the blood on Komurasaki's clothes.

“The hell?” she asked. 

Komurasaki seemed to do great, though, and she walked in with a hurry to take Toko in her arms after changing into a discreet, more modest robe than her usual attire and throwing her jewelry on the ground. Nina turned an inquisitive glance to Kyoshiro who frowned at her.

“No time to explain. All of you need to leave the castle.”

“But…”

“NOW!” 

Nina frowned, sensing the urge in Kyoshiro’s voice. She nodded and, holding Ozzy close to her chest, she followed Komurasaki and Toko through a secret escape.

One month.

31 days.

738 hours or so. 

Nina’s eyes didn’t leave the hearth, fire crackling and flames casting a warm light through the little wood shed. Toko was sleeping peacefully next to her, holding Ozzy against her, her permanent grin not leaving her face. Nina looked up at the green haired  woman sitting across her, a protective hand on her belly.

“So what do I have to call you now?” Nina asked. 

“Hiyori.”

Nina studied her face. When they arrived at the secret hideout, Hiyori explained everything to her. How she was actually Oden’s daughter. How she was born on the Oro Jackson, a long time ago. How she had to watch her little brother jump forward in the future thanks to some time travel devil fruit, while her mother was dying in the flames. How a plan to take down Orochi and Kaido was in place, silently building in the shadows for the past 26 years. Once again, Nina met her eyes and a silent comprehension passed between the two women. They both experienced what true loneliness was, they both saw the ugliest face of men. At this exact moment, Nina understood why Hiyori took care of her. Seeing her alone with her baby, pregnant with the second, must have reminded her of her own family. 

“That’s not everything.” Hiyori said, a serious glance on her face. She bent aside and grabbed a newspaper on the ground before giving it to Nina.

Nina frowned and took the journal, and her eyes went wide in shock as she read. The news was about a pirate captain sent to Udon jail, and even if the picture below was only an ink drawing, she couldn’t help the tears flooding down her cheeks when she recognized Kid.

“I need to go there.”

“Nina…” Hiyori started to sigh, but Nina cut her off.

“No, you don’t understand!” 

She looked at Ozzy, still peacefully asleep in Toko’s arms, occasionally twitching in his sleep.

“His father… Ozzy’s father. One of them. He’s maybe there, I can’t-”

“Nina.”

Hiyori's tone was stern now, and Nina sighed, knowing already where the conversation was landing. Since Hiyori saved her, they had it on a daily basis. Nina sat down, putting a hand on her belly.

“I know, I know. I’m pregnant. I have to be careful.” 

Hiyori smiled softly, looking up at her with her big, soft eyes, and Nina smiled back. Both women looked at the fire in silence for a moment.

“I hope they’re doing fine.” Nina whispered, caressing her belly softly, where her little one was giving high kicks again. “I can’t live without them.” She cursed herself mentally for being so sappy. 

When did she become so sensitive? After the whole Perona disaster, she thought she was done with romantic bullshit. She was a tough girl, picking up fights in bars and sailing alone, surviving out of thieving and brawlings. She sailed for months, years maybe even, alone, and she held herself alone, even if she had to rely on drugs or sell her body to keep on going. But destiny made her cross paths with Kid pirates, and Killer saved her, and she allowed herself to fall in love again, and then she fell for Kid as well, and the crew adopted her, and she adopted them. And then there were the children, and soon she was surrounded by more tenderness and affection than she could handle. She wiped her tears. Fucking mood swings.

Hiyori seemed to notice her demeanor change, because she moved ever so slightly to wrap an arm around her shoulders, slowly comforting her.

“They’re alive. I would have heard of it if they were dead,” She whispered. Nina nodded, nuzzling against Hiyori's shoulder, closing her eyes.

“I hope so.”

Nina woke up the next morning, snuggled against Hiyori. She sighed in relief. It was good to feel the warmth of another human being again - well, an adult one. With regret, she withdrew herself from the green haired woman's embrace. She stood up and took Ozzy in her arms, cradling him tenderly. Behind her, the fire was dying slowly. It was cold outside, they would need to light another one, and there was no more dry wood left. She wrapped Ozzy in his carrier and tied it on her back. Hiyori would scold her for not resting but she couldn't help it. She didn't want to feel like a burden. She didn't want to feel useless. Hiyori had saved their life, the least she could do was to ensure her a warm room to wake up in. She walked out of the small cabin and closed the door behind her.

Nina was out in the snow, gathering some dry wood, when a deafening scream pierced the ambient silence. She jolted her head as she recognized Hiyori's voice. Without thinking, she put Ozzy in safety next to the wood carrier, wrapping her vest around him to keep him warm and safe, and ran to Hiyori as fast as her round belly allowed her to. 

Her mind went blank at the scene she was witnessing. 

Hiyori was hidden behind a green haired samurai who looked a bit like the mugiwara sword guy… Roronoa? She was shaking, terrified, holding Toko close in her arms. And in front of them…

This laugh. 

This blonde mane. 

Those icy blue eyes. 

Nina eyes went wide and without thinking, she ran to them as Roronoa was about to attack.

“NO!!”

She yelled, throwing herself between Roronoa and his opponent. Hiyori screamed, but Nina couldn’t care less, her focus on the laughing figure in front of her. Tears perked at the corners of their eyes and she took a few steps forward. At this moment, Roronoa didn’t exist anymore, Hiyori didn’t exist anymore, even Ozzy was far away in her mind. The only thing that mattered for her were those beautiful icy blue eyes piercing through the bandages. So soft. So familiar. The eyes that looked at her with adoration every morning and always managed to make her feel safe.

 She took a few steps forwards, wiping her eyes with a relieved chuckle.

“Killer? My lion?”

The blonde looked down at her, a grin plastered on his face. Killer didn’t usually grin without his mask, but after a month without seeing each other, he was probably happy to see her too. She took another step forward, still chuckling in relief. Killer looked down at her, immobile. She looked up at him with pure adoration and sobbed. 

“Killer, I'm so…” 

She froze when he suddenly arched back, letting out a loud burst of laughter. He laughed. Loudly. Killer laughed. In front of perfect strangers. In front of an opponent. 

Puzzled and worried, she held a hand to caress his cheek, an attempted comforting gesture, but before she could touch his skin, she was violently thrown in the snow, kicked in her belly by the wood of his scythes. She felt an intense pain bowing her in half, then, nothing. 

The last thing she saw before passing out was Killer's frame passing by her side as if she was nothing but an insect he brushed off his shoulder. The last thing she heard was his laugh fading in the distance, and then everything went black.

[seraphicloves]

𝒋𝒋𝒌 𝒉𝒆𝒂𝒅𝒄𝒂𝒏𝒐𝒏𝒔 𝒘 𝒂 𝒔𝒏𝒐𝒓𝒕𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒅𝒆𝒓!

⊱✿⊰ summary: requested by anon; jjk boys reacting to a reader who snort (laughing not drugs) and is insecure abt it

⊱✿⊰ warnings: insecurities, overall very cute!!, romantic undertone possibly(?), should be gender neutral, one suggestive comment in toji's and in choso's

⊱✿⊰ notes: ty to who requested this! i included only the canonically adult characters bc you said "men" but feel free to ask for a pt.2 with other characters you want to see (politely ofc i am sensitive)

Satoru Gojo:

❀ he thinks you are the cutest thing, ever. seeing the way you tilt your head back with laughter, eyes shining with unshed tears. and oh god, that snort? you were so adorable he was sure he was going to explode

❀ gojo definitely teased you about your reaction, although not maliciously of course. he'll give you that signature smirk and say in that cooing voice, "aw, baby! that was so cute, do it again!" and absolutely adore watching you fluster

❀ he would not allow you to be insecure. you are like a literal god, how could you be insecure? especially over something seemingly miniscule. he'll tease you of course, but he makes sure you know he doesn't think its weird. hell, he'd probably make sure to snort around you later, so you feel less alone.

Suguru Geto

❀ laughter is a rare thing for the cult leader, even rarer with such a genuine one. but he doesn't seem to mind seeing your eyes twinkle with amusement and a snort escaping you.

❀ "hm? i didn't think i was that funny." he mused, unable to suppress his slight smirk. he reveled in the way your eyes widened and your face warmed, your embarrassment prevalent.

❀ he could tell you were insecure about the noise you made, which surprised him a bit. what surprised him even more was the fact he cared how you were feeling.

❀ "it's nice to know somebody appreciates my humor." geto said, trying to alleviate your insecurities. he wasn't sure why he cared about you, but he did and he wasn't planning on stopping.

Ryomen Sukuna

❀ he probably wasn't purposely making a joke, so he definitely thinks you're making fun of me. all huffing and puffing, asking, "why are you mocking your king in such insolent ways? answer me, human."

❀ then he figures out you're not mocking him, and feels a slight sense of pride. you thought he was funny? he would be sure to try and say funnier things mors often (though his lame attempts at knock knock jokes are more dorky than anything)

❀ when you apolgize for snorting, he was a bit confused. what were you apolgizing for? so he simply said that, "don't be ridiculous, peasant. it was an adequate reaction." which was his way of saying it was cute.

❀ he refuses to let you be insecure, as long as he's aware of it. for some reason he wants to worship you like a queen, he has the strange urge to make you happy always. so he makes sure you know you weren't weird for snorting. hell he might force his servants to snort around you so you feel more comfortable.

Kento Nanami

❀ he was probably confused by something you said jokingly, taking the statement literally. it was so absurd you couldn't help but laugh a little which turned into a full snort.

❀ nanami will give you a mildly amused look, mixed with a hint of confusion. "did i say something funny?" and you would look away with a guilty smile

❀ he might not admit it, but he loves your laugh and your snort. it felt so pure and untouched by the grim realities of life. he liked how happy it sounded.

❀ he'll secretly overexaggerate his lack of understanding a joke, taking things in a literal sense even if he knows what you mean. he also tries out some dad jokes on you, of which are so bad you can't help but snort

Toji Fushiguro

❀ he was probably insulting someone or saying something so awful you can't help but snort. he'd look over at you with surprise before he gave you a shit eating grin

❀ "hm? what a pretty noise, i wonder what others you could make..." yeah he's a shameless flirt, literally not caring if you know how much he wants you. toji is confident in himself.

❀ he adores your snort, wishing he could always and only be the one to make you feel happy. maybe he'll make more comments that you would find funny, just in hopes to be the one to put that pretty smile on your face

Choso Kamo

❀ he has zero clue what he did to make you snort, he had just been trying to ask a question about some balls? what was so funny about the toy?

❀ he very bluntly asks you, "what did i say that was funny? I wanna hear you make that noise again." He gave you a smile, brown eyes twinkling.

❀ that would practically just erase any insecurities, with how genuine his enjoyment in your little snort was. and anyway now you were more focused in having to explain to choso the misfortune of having a dirty mind.

lori © 2024. please don't copy, modify, or do anything weird with my writing! i like reblogs and comments but please be kind as this was my writing.

[hollowed-theory-hall]

I'd love to know your thoughts on the Gaunts in Hogwarts Legacy. I loved Ominis as a character, and the story of his family was interesting, but I'd really love an in-universe explanation for how they get to the state they are at when Tom is born in less than what... 40ish years? At most? How exactly do they go from multiple family members functional enough to attend Hogwarts to barely able to speak English (or seemingly use magic) that quickly?

So, the reason I didn't put Ominis and the Gaunts in my big canon contradictions in the HL post, is becouse I can in fact headcanon my way into Ominis' existence making sense (kinda). We only need one big factor that would allow for a very fast decline and we have one — inbreeding.

I mentioned this already here, but Marvolo speaks like he remembers the influence his family once had. Not only that, but he's different from his kids. He acts more like a person who can be somewhat reasoned with than both his barely more than squib children who don't seem capable of much intellectually.

How this might've happened is, say, one Gaunt got obsessed with blood purity and around the 1780s married his cousin.

His children turn out okay since it's just one generation of cousin marriages, but then his son also marries a cousin in the 1810s.

Their children would still seem reasonably fine and marry cousins again. And they have children in the 1840s.

By this point, most of them would be losing prestige and money and many other purebloods would want nothing to do with the Gaunts. This pushes them to keep marrying just a bit too close and shrink down the family to only the main line and maybe another one.

So, these children born in the 1840s would have their own kids with their cousins around the 1870s.

Now, these kids are Marvolo and Ominis, another brother (since Ominis mentions having older brothers), and at least one sister (for the sake of this theory to work). By this point, inbreeding would start to be a problem after 4 generations of first/second-cousin marriages in a row, which would work with Ominis being born blind, for example (which is a possible result of inbreeding).

Now, while both Ominis in the game and Marvolo in the 1920s talk a big game about their family influence, by the 1890s, it's a lie. I think they started falling from grace earlier throughout the century (as I mentioned), losing money and prestige and holding onto their position in the wizarding world by the skin of their teeth. Ominis' posturing about his father knowing the headmaster in HL always came off to me as just that — posturing. His father may have met Phineas Nigellus Black, but they weren't close by any means. Ominis is just threatening you the way he knows and can — which is some of the connections still left for his family since the money ran dry years ago.

The fact we don't see other kids in Slytherin trying to win Ominis' good graces for the sake of his family's influence (blindness or not) again suggests a lot of said influence is posturing more than the real deal. I mean, he's only friends with Sebastian and Anne, two students who are definitely outsiders within Slytherin (even if there's no way they live in Feldcroft, since there's no way that hamlet doesn't exist in the books).

Also, Ominis mentions his brothers and father tortured muggles. There's a non-zero chance that in 1890 most of his family is in Azkaban and he really is just lying and he has nothing he can do against anyone with his connections. Basically, it's a bluff.

I think seeing them like this adds an interesting reason as to why Noctua (Ominis' aunt) would want to look for Slytherin's Scripturium (though I don't think the Scripturium exists in the books, so let's say she looked for the Chamber of Secrets and was eaten by the basilisk since she wasn't the heir it was meant to obey in the 1880s). Becouse she's trying to bring the family back to its place of influence as descendants of Salazar Slytherin in a different way from her brother.

By the 1890s, Noctua is dead, there are no Gaunt cousins, just the main line with Marvolo, Ominis, unnamed brother, and unnamed sister.

Ominis is likely disowned at some point, and it fits his character to decide not to have kids and not pass on Parseltongue, which he sees as dark. I can see his character making that decision. But for this theory to work, he has to die before Tom is born, so he doesn't live a long life unless he left Britain and is living happily in the US or Australia or something.

The unnamed brother might be in Azkaban for crucio-ing a muggle, getting him out of the picture in an in-character way and making sure he has no kids.

Marvolo is where it gets interesting becouse with the state we see with his kids, and the nosedive off a cliff the family took in his time, my theory is that he had his kids with the aforementioned named sister. It would explain why Morfin and Mereope are like that. It would explain why they were completely shunned from wizarding society. How they lost even the measly amount of influence they had so quickly. It would fit with Marvolo's view of blood purity and the Gaunts' blood in particular, being purer than the rest.

So, this is my answer as to how I can headcanon my way into the Gaunt family's fast decline making sense. That being said, do I think Ominis is canon for the books' universe? Probably not, but I can make up shit to make it work, as I illustrated here.

[inarjollyhound]

Fixed Points in time in BDFI's Timeline

TPOT 15/BFDIA 17 Spoilers

I think it's very interesting which events are either completely or mostly unaffected or resistant to any of changing timelines in TPOT 15 and BFDIA 17.

Voting Results

Even before One bestows everyone with the knowledge of the original timeline- none of the vote results are changed- Aside from the implication that Taco won the 1-vote difference in that Post-split BFB episode in the Pillory Ruins.

2. The Challenge for TPOT 15.

This could have been put at risk- if all of the active hosts hear that the OG timeline involved them not being the host (Especially Four and Announcer). Thank fully, it seems that only a couple of them heard the implication that someone else was supposed to be the host.

Thankfully, despite all the variation, most of them can agree that the stability of the timeline/saftey of the world is more important than their ambitions or personal interests.

Which in contrast- says a lot about how strongly pencil feels about getting eliminated

3. The Shift/The BFDIA/TPOT Yoyalite time travel catalysts.

Despite the collapsing time-periods, It seems that the universe is pree-desposed to avoiding a grandfather paradox at all costs- Which is to say, *None of the timeline shifts Prevent either Golf-Ball or Nickel from getting sent forward in time- nor do they change how the rejects in TPOT get sent back in time.* The Yoyalite time-travel events seem to be canon events in it of themselves. So fate seems to be weighted in favor of self-preservation.

In fact, this could probably be the explanation as to why Leafy being invited into Dream Island was so destructive- It's probably one of if not THE most destructive Grand-father Paradox-esque type cf change that could happen to the time-line.

(This also implies that Leafy's loss of Dream island and Firey/Tax Income Document's relationship is also a canon event)

4. Marker's Color/The Present Contestant's appearances

This seems like something that's really not all that stable or un-affected given the start of the episode- but I do think it's notable that Marker only changes Color *Once* in the wake of all the changing timelines hosts and artstyles in the very begining- and also remains the same after it's mostly stabilized.

And to a lesser degree- One giving all of the contestants knowledge of the prime timeline seemed to also prevent them from changing their art-style, like what happened at the intro.

This could imply that either External Knowledge inherently maintains a level of stability in the present- or Four did just a little more than keep everyone's memories.

5. The other Timeline Anomaly Events.

Akin to what I described on #3, it seems like almost none of the times that the Rejects teleport to are changed beyond recognition by any other timeline change from another contesting going even further back- that is, beyond Firey getting replaced by Tax Return Document.

CONCLUSIONS

From this- two possibilities come to mind-

The Timeline is Ultimately predisposed to avoiding any divergence to a change in canon or fate- keeping things from being as bad or incomprehensible is it *Could* be.

1a. It's not fate or the Universe, One has been keeping the timeline a bit more stable to drag things out- so to convince Gaty to sign the contract more efficiently.

1b. It could also be Black Hole- either locking in and keeping things together, or he's just unintentionally/instinctually keeping the fabric of the universe together- while being unaware of their portential.

2. Yoyalite can Access Alternate Universes, in addition to Time Travel.

The present timeline isn't especially Stable or resistant- Yoyalite is just capable of allowing it's users to *Leave it entirely*

The butterfly effects and grandfather paradoxes *ARE* happening, the Yoyalite is just capable of sending people to whatever specific parallel dimension or event is happening- even if not a part of the current timeline.

The Contestents having the knowledge of the Prime canon timeline, is the sole reason that none of the contants are lost to the infinite possibilities and time-line splits. The know which paralell universe splits to go to, therefore the Yoylelite can take them there.

The only major Anomaly here- Is the fact that the Changes in Total Firey Island are so substantial- That they can somehow over-ride the universes contants visit from that moment onwards.

Perhaps There's something Unique about Total Firey Island that gives it a higher level of influence of all the universe than what they Yoyalite can do.

(Perhaps this means Yoyalite is a canonically viable means access other realities- like Inanimate Insanity, or other object shows- if you don't consider the Meetup skits to be canon as is.)

-ANYWAYS.

I'm a huge dork about timetravel in media, and have a lot more fun coming with conclusions than conceding "oh welp, i guess that's just a plot hole"

So if anyone found any interesting implations from my theories- ENJOY i gues xD

[pigfartsviatardis]

Was discussing queerbaiting recently with a friend because we’re watching Once Upon A Time (trash, but shockingly well written trash in the first 3 seasons) and obs we both ship swan queen. I mean. Come on.

But we noticed that from the start of s3 onwards, there was noticeably less shippy stuff between these two. There’s still a bit here and there because a) lesbian mums and b) chemistryyyy… but it felt like the writers were intentionally backing off from that pairing and putting genuine effort into the male love interests for both characters.

You might think that becalming the swan queen ship would have annoyed or disappointed my friend and myself, the shippers. But tbh we both agreed that it was actually nice to see a writing team see a popular queer fandom ship, go ‘oh whoops that’s not endgame’, and actively NOT bait it.

Obviously everyone here is aware of the Golden Age Of Queerbaiting, the late 2000s/early 2010s; even if you’re too young to have actually battled through it, it’s deep tumblr lore. We all know the repeat and egregious offenders from that time - destiel, merthur, johnlock, whatever the main one was on teen wolf - and how gleefully these shows would dangle queer rep in front of our twitching little noses.

Recently, I’ve noticed a more insidious trend: the Male Friendship Scarcity Myth. The most glaring recent examples are nandermo (WWDITS) and jayvik (arcane), both of which were popular ships after the first season(s) of their shows aired and were subsequently given increased screen time and shippy scenes/storylines. In the case of nandermo, the romantic feelings (at least from Guillermo) were textual. Both pairings were given ambiguous endings where they were together, but not confirmed as, yknow, together.

And then both showrunners, after the shows ended, decided to step up to the mic and give a heartfelt little speech along the lines of ‘men are allowed to be friends without it being sexual, and it’s actually really important that we show this, because we need more representation of close platonic brotherly male friendship in media’.

Anyone who was around during the aforementioned Golden Age Of Queerbaiting, or in fact anyone who consumes popular media at all, knows that this is horseshit.

It’s only ever close platonic brotherly male friendship. Or at least, 95% of the time. Everywhere you look, from major fandom shows to mcu movies, platonic male relationships are often front and centre. That’s nearly always the canon. How often does a major mlm ship actually go canon??? Hardly ever. Even destiel didn’t; cas’s feelings were confirmed last minute, but the official canon dynamic between him and dean is still brotherly bffs.

Are these friendships often the subject of intense fandom shipping? Yes, as literally any close relationship between any two characters of any gender always will be. People like shipping! But the official canon, and the gospel truth held up by poorly disguised homophobes in fandom, is nearly always strictly platonic bros.

Anyway. All this to say, I’ve been disillusioned recently seeing this myth pop up in every comments section on any jayvik-related content, that we have a lack of male friendship in media (we don’t, we have a lack of male friendship that isn’t queer coded to super turbo gay hell and back in media). I was even more disillusioned seeing the exact same rhetoric being spewed by those involved with WWDITS, which is ironically a show jam packed full of close male friendships THAT INVOLVE CASUAL SEX. The call was truly coming from inside the coffin on that one.

So, unexpectedly and somewhat depressingly, swan queen and OUAT have been a balm for the soul in the midst of all this. No queerbaiting (at least not where I’m up to), just good old fashioned straightwashing. At least it’s honest 🤷‍♀️

[ectterna]

How fanon are the sans ‘groups’

(Bad sanses and star sanses)

-

So I am in a server and I was chatting with a person about this thing they were going to write about rarepairs (plat) and people from the bad and star sanses who normally wouldn't talk.

Which made me think…

I live for the fact that NOBODY we group would ever be with eachother canonically.

Ink canonically is a loner unless it is more efficient… So, for example, he would briefly work with Dream if let's say nightmare was messing around with an AU and Dream so happened to be there.

Dream would probably actually work with people but I strongly doubt many would help him, they would have to be incredibly caring and kind. In this case Dream, Blue, and possibly Core Frisk would work. While characters like Delta, Color, and Killer may be allied with Dream, I don't think they would entirely help out. Colors watching killer, killer would be at risk, idfk what delta does but he would be the only one I suspect might. Then there's Abyss, who from what I read has his own gang so they might team up but that's it.

For Blue, Ink may stop Dream initially but as the fandom gains hold and the AU is more loose. He may allow it with a different underswap or something like that. Otherwise, Ink would view it as interference, and take him back.

Now Nightmares troupe is more do-able (if ink let’s it happen, Killers is an exception because its his canon to work with Nightmare so Ink leaves him be). Let say we are going with the multiple Killers theory and theres more than one Killer, after something new Killer is chilling and isn’t doing anything, but another Killer takes his place. If theres always a Killer, he will be the only one actually working for Nightmare.

Horror is easy if Nightmare bribes him with feeding his underground or powering the core. Otherwise, he wouldn’t join.

Dust will never leave his AU unless he is forced, this is canon. Dust would have to be kidnapped to ever work for Nightmare, there’s no bribery that could get this man out of judgement hall. After, Dust would actually be pretty loyal just so he could go home! Id like to think that Dust actually would be a better right hand man for Nightmare but Killer is also matched. Dust would never call Killer a ‘Dog’ because he is one too.

Cross is his own thing but I promise you this man doesn’t want to be in either gang. This man just wanna go home, chill, and have his life back.

As much as this stuff would never happen, that makes me want it even more… (●´ω｀●)

[copiiialover]

‎♡‧˚Do you love me now?‎˚‧♡

Title: Do you love me now?

Chapter 1

Pairing: Park Gyeong Seok / Cho Hyun Ju Synopsis: Hyun-ju tries to return to her life outside the game as she mourns Gyeong-seok's death and tries to keep her promise, but nothing goes as she expected and things take an unexpected turn when familiar faces come back into her life and fill her mind with doubts. Tags/Possible Warnings: Canon Divergence / Related, Post-Episode: s02e07, Drama & Romance, Hurt/Comfort, Trans Character, Misgendering, BAMF Cho Hyun Ju, Light Violence, Angst and Feels, More Tags Soon.

Chapter 1: When two hearts are torn away

⸻ ⸻ ⸻ ⸻ ৎ୭ ⸻ ⸻ ⸻ ⸻

"Players, it's time for bed. Return immed-"

The voice is muted as Hyun-ju fires at the speaker, but the sound of bullets echoes behind her back as she makes her way into the dorm.

“Dae-ho!” she calls through the speaker of her radio, getting nothing but silence from player 388. “Where are you! We need the ammo!” she exclaims, looking left and right for any soldiers that might attack, but all she can see is blood and bodies scattered in the hallways.

The radio remains silent and impotence fills her; she doesn't understand what's taking Dae-ho so long. She checks the clip of her gun and curses her luck and the ex-marine when she finds she only has a couple of bullets. She thinks about smacking him with all her might if they make it out of that place, but in a moment of clarity she scolds herself for not even thinking about the fact that Dae-ho might have been attacked by one of the soldiers or even one of the other players.

“Fuck…” she mutters with a lump in her throat, thinking about what will greet her when she gets to the dormitory. If the other players have teamed up against them, then everything is lost.

“Dae-ho!” She calls the player again, feeling a relief settling in her body as she walks into the large room and finds that both groups are still separated in their respective spots. “Dae-ho!” she shouts, searching for the ex-marine, but the only ones receiving her are Geum-ja and Yong-sik.

“Hyun-ju... Where are the others?” the woman mutters with a voice full of fear, yet Hyun-ju doesn't have time to calm her down.

“Where's Dae-ho?!” she inquires. Mother and son reply by staring at the bunks at the back of the room. Hyun-ju runs to him, stopping when she sees the man suffering in what she immediately recognizes as a panic attack induced by a notorious post-traumatic stress.

Hyun-ju sees the ammo wrapped in the sweatshirt on the bed, but she can't go back alone.

“Dae-ho…” She calls him in a low voice, leaning closer to touch his shoulder, but the ex-marine shrinks into himself and starts sobbing.

“I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry!” Dae-ho cries without daring to look at Hyun-ju. “Dad, I'm sorry! I'm sorry! Please, don't hurt me!” he pleads, moving away from her and covering himself with his hands.

Hyun-ju feels a knot in her stomach, but she doesn't allow herself to spiral at a moment like that. She rushes to grab the ammo and stands up, ready to return along with the others. Yet it's all in vain when the metallic doors at the entrance swing open and the sound of two shots echoes through the room.

“Everyone on the floor!” the pink soldier shouts. Hyun-ju hides between the bunks and stares at the soldiers scattering, counting as many as she can. She changes the clip on her gun and makes a move to get closer to a spot with a clearer view, but the grip on her arm stops her.

“Hyun-ju, no…” Geum-ja whispers, pleading with her eyes for her to stop. Hyun-ju glances at her, then back at the soldiers. She can't kill them all, but she can kill enough of them to clear the area again and get back with the others. “Don't sacrifice yourself in vain,” the woman persists.

"The following players have been eliminated:

Player 072 - 015 - 047 - 001 - 390 - 246..."

Hyun-ju is shocked as she hears the voice saying his number. It can’t be possible, not him. Her hands tremble and the pain and impotence blinds her. She pulls away from Geum-ja's grip and aims her gun at the group of soldiers.

“Hyun-ju, please... Stop. Stop. No more, please...” Geum-ja begs between tears, stopping her again.

She wants to pull the trigger and kill them all, but even someone with a good aim like hers is at risk of missing and condemning the others to a certain death. She thinks of Gyeong-seok, her daughter and her promise. She shuts her eyes and tears slide down her cheeks. All of them died in vain. He died in vain...

The soldiers get to them and aim their guns at Hyun-ju and Dae-ho, but Geum-ja stands between them.

“Don't shoot, please, just take the guns and take them away!” she cries as her son tries to pull her away. After a moment that feels like an eternity, the soldiers step back and take the guns.

Hyun-ju breaks into tears and Geum-ja holds her to her chest, whispering words hushed by her sobs. She stares at Dae-ho over the woman's shoulder and she hates him with all her heart. If he had returned they wouldn't be dead. Gyeong-seok wouldn't be dead. Jung-bae wouldn't be dead. She tightens her hold on Geum-ja and shuts her eyes, shuddering through sobs and forcing herself to forget her anger because even if the truth hurts, he's not to blame.

A new group of soldiers walks into the room with the unmistakable black coffins. The leader of the soldiers clears his throat to get everyone's attention.

“We apologize for the inconvenience” the soldier speaks as the players mumble to each other from the bunks. Even some of those who were interested in playing the game are terrified. “Those who wish to end the game will have to follow the rules and wait for tomorrow's vote. Any act of rebellion against the established rules will be punished by elimination” he warns.

The players on both sections are silent. Do they finally understand that the only way to get out of that place alive is to divide the accumulated money and vote for their release? Even when pain, anger and sadness are still gnawing inside her, Hyun-ju still has the hope to believe in that possibility. However, as if fate were a cruel prankster, everyone's attention is pulled back to the piggy bank descending upon them.

“Before the end of the day, let me inform you about the amount accumulated so far” the soldier announces, starting the descent of the bundles of bills piling up in the piggy bank with his words.

Hyun-ju feels sick to her stomach. While everyone is watching the money, she sees the soldiers putting the bodies of the murdered players into the coffins. Is that what they have been reduced to? To ignore a massacre to be rewarded? In that instant she finally understands Gi-hun's words by refusing to enjoy the prize.

After the announcement of the amount accumulated, the soldiers leave the room and the silence returns, starting the countdown on the clock in the room. Tension settles in the air as everyone fears if another attack among them will take place when the lights go out.

“We still have a chance, isn't it?” Geum-ja asks, with Hyun-ju laying on her lap with a blank stare as the old lady strokes her hair in some sort of consolation.

The small group gathered in the bunks is silent. Now that Gi-hun is gone, everyone feels like a flock of missing sheep.

“You really think so?” Yong-sik asks in disbelief, earning a disapproving glare from his mother. “I-I mean... We have lost so many of us. We're at a big disadvantage…”

Hyun-ju stays silent. A single thought floods her mind: if they are attacked again, dying that night or in the next game will be like an act of mercy for her. Any desire to survive has faded away again. She looks at Dae-ho away from the group, still cowering in himself, and she wonders if he’s thinking the same. Being blinded by her anger kept her from thinking about it before, but now, when the only feeling still beating in her is sadness, she thinks of the own hell Dae-ho has been through before coming to that place and that moment. She has lost Gyeong-seok and Young-mi, but now he carries the blame for Jung-bae's death even if it's not his fault.

A sudden bustle on the other side of the room draws Hyun-ju out of her thoughts and catches everyone's attention.

“Then go away with them, you cowards!” the 100th player shouts.

The small group of five players approaching them looks at them with shame, hoping to be welcomed after being part of the ones who stopped them from leaving that place. No one says a word or shows any rejection, at least until the 100th player's voice is heard again.

“I'll make sure to spend all the money we get for your deaths in booze and whores! That's what brave men like us deserve!” he boasts, encouraging his group to cheer his words.

The others just ignore him, but Hyun-ju can't. Not when she remembers Gyeong-seok asking her to visit his daughter at the hospital since he knew he wouldn't survive. A knot tightens her stomach, filled with impotence at the idea of how unfair it feels that Gyeong-seok is dead but that man has a chance to live and waste money as the selfish pig he is. How will she be able to live with the knowledge that somebody like him might live while Gyeong-seok's daughter dies asking where her father is?

“Hyun-ju?” Geum-ja calls her, puzzled when she gets up from her lap and makes her way between the bunks; her eyes fixed on the other group. “Hyun-ju, where are you going?!” she asks, trying to stop her, but Yong-sik stops her this time, forcing her to watch as Hyun-ju walks away across the room, unable to do anything.

“Oh, look who's coming...” the 100th player says with a smirk full of arrogance at the sight of her. “What's the matter, doll? Are you joining us? Another man in our team will do,” he sneers, not even bothering to disguise his disgust in every word.

Hyun-ju stops before him with no response and one firm punch to the man's face is enough to knock him to the ground. Hyun-ju lunges at him and punches him again; this time across the nose. Blood stains her knuckles and the man coughs out a cry of pain.

“What the hell are you doing, you bastards! Get him off of me!” the man demands with a snarl, waving his hands as he tries to defend himself. Hyun-ju waits for the others to attack her. She even feels the menace of someone coming at her, but all it comes in response is Nam-gyu's body collapsing limp at her side.

The others step back in shock and a quick glance behind her reveals the identity of the perpetrator. Standing there, with hands clenched in tense fists trembling in restrained fear, Hyun-ju looks at Dae-ho. The ex-marine is tense from head to toe; his chest heaving in and out in ragged breaths. He glances down at Hyun-ju and bows his head in a nod she takes as an apology about what happened during the riot.

“You bastards, we're more than them! Help me!” the man shrieks beneath her, drawing back her attention. A smirk curves Hyun-ju's lips and she grabs him by the shirt, leaning over him.

“You really think they give a shit about helping a pig like you?” she whispers, looking him straight in the eye. “Why would they step in if killing you is going to fill their pockets even more?”

Hyun-ju doesn't have to look at the others to know they're staring at each other, considering her words. The silence from everyone around confirms them she is right.

“There's a little girl out there that lost her father in this fucked up thing for some money he'll never get!” she yells; her voice trembling trying to hold back her tears. “And I'd rather die for killing you than allow a bastard like you to get a single cent!” she shouts, landing another punch to the man's face, followed by another and a third one that makes his head hit the ground with a thud.

"Players, return to your beds to finish the day. Lights will go out in one minute. Repeat: Lights will go out in one minute. Follow the instructions and return to your beds."

Despite the speaker's indication, Hyun-ju doesn't back away and hits the man again, who's mouth lets out a whimper as he tries to avoid drowning in his own blood. Cutting off her anger, Hyun-ju feels two arms wrap around her and yank her away from the player.

“Hyun-ju, stop! Stop it now!” Yong-sik says, trying hard to drag her away from the others. No intention of attacking them is evident, but they can't take the risk of being helpless when the lights are about to go out. 

“Let me go, I'm going to kill him!” she shouts, struggling to get free, but tiredness taking its toll on her and Dae-ho joining Yong-sik in dragging her away becomes too much to bear. “Watch your fucking back 'cause I'll be after you if you're not dead, you son of a bitch!” she threatens, but there's no answer from player number 100.

The surrounding players look at the man with disdain and walk away in silence, leaving Nam-gyu lying on the ground next to him. Hyun-ju gives in and lets herself be taken to the bunks, with Geum-ja rushing to check her hand to try to cure it.

“It's not mine…” Hyun-ju mumbles in a muffled voice, referring to the blood on her knuckles when she notices concern in the old lady's face. “I'm fine…”

“The lights will go out in: Ten, nine, eight-”

The woman nods in silence as she takes her place in the bunk on her side. Hyun-ju sits on her bed, moving backwards till she gets to the wall. It doesn't matter how many times she's beaten the man or if she's succeeded in killing him; nothing will make Gyeong-seok come back.

The clock reaches zero as she shrinks into herself, hugging her legs to her chest and letting herself be engulfed by the dark.

⸻ ⸻ ⸻ ⸻ ৎ୭ ⸻ ⸻ ⸻ ⸻

English is not my native language, so please excuse any mistakes.

Please consider leaving a comment here or on the original fanfic posted on AO3: Do you love me now?

[stillness-in-green]

Finding Fascism in My Hero Academia (COMPLETE)

The final part (and the longest, thanks to an extended ramble about language usage on the last point) is now public on the Patreon! Find the links to all parts below, or hit the jump to read a final round of excerpts, including the final tally and a bit from the conclusion:

PART ONE PART TWO PART THREE PART FOUR (<- New!)

Point 12: Machismo and weaponry.

The major exception to the rejection of modernism—fascists are boys who love their toys.  Looking for ways to carry over the national-scale preoccupations with strength and warfare, these values are recreated on the smaller and more personal scale via an obsession with masculinity, virility, and martial prowess.  This leads to a disdain for femininity (fascism is frequently patriarchal) as well as non-standard sexual habits (chastity, homosexuality, etc.).  The constipation about sex also leads to a lot of that energy spilling over/being displaced into the fascination with weaponry, giving the relationship of the fascist to his weapon(s) a sexual charge.

Meta-Narrative: It’s probably the case that a solid majority of Shonen Jump manga are a little (and sometimes a lot) dysfunctional about women and sexuality, and if MHA is better than some of them, well, it’s no great accomplishment to be less sexist than Death Note.  While I don’t think Horikoshi intends to be disdainful of women or femininity, the pattern of the work is clear in terms of the attention and effectiveness MHA’s women are allowed to enjoy.

Meanwhile, the story pokes fun at Deku’s idea of romance as being ill-informed, but its own most overt engagement with the fact of human sexuality really only comes in one flavor: predatory.  While it’s treated with different levels of seriousness—we might posit a spectrum between Mineta and Toga, with Midnight holding down the middle—the story is, by and large, totally at sea on how to depict healthy, reciprocal sexuality, so it either turns it into a joke (Mineta, Midnight), makes it terrifying (Toga, also Midnight), or buries it (Ochaco’s repression plotline, throwaway nods to the romantic entanglements of non-Class A characters).  As was much joked about on Twitter, the relationship that provides the main romantic throughline of the entire series concludes with a dap-style handshake!

—(…)—

Point 13: Selective populism./Delegitimization of parliamentary government.

Individuals within fascism have no rights and no ability to exercise political will.  They can only act as a theatrical monolith; the Leader interprets the “will of the people” and any people/institutions who disagree with the Leader are targeted for failing to represent said will.  Leads to hostility towards elected/representative groups as being corrupt or illegitimate.  For those in the U.S., consider every attack ad you see during election season about how this or that politician is a slave to the “swamp” and not what their constituency “wants” or “needs”; even more prominently, consider Donald Trump’s constant attacks on the legitimacy of any election or lawsuit he loses.

MLA: There are definitely shades of it—the MLA certainly doesn’t operate as a democracy!—but it’s not “populism” as defined by Eco because no one is really pretending to speak “for the people.”  Rather, they’re all pretty clear on following the will of one specific person, that being the great Destro (as interpreted by his descendant); Destro’s will does represent an ideal future for “the people,” but Re-Destro makes no pretenses of speaking for the people as a collective right now.  While we could make some attempts to tie their ideal of Liberation to selective populism—would their talk of people being free to use their meta-abilities to become their truest selves make room for people whose goals and dreams have nothing to do with their meta-abilities at all?—evidence from the canon is conflicting.

(...)

As to the delegitimization of parliamentary governments, well, Trumpet is the parliamentary elephant in the room.  The PLF’s plan per Hawks is to at least undermine the legitimate government, though it’s unclear whether “storm the political world” means carrying out some sort of populist coup or just using the tidal wave of changed public opinion to sweep the next election.  In Eco’s definition, the whole gist of this point is stripping the public at large of any ability to meaningfully self-govern, both by depriving them of their right to make their voice heard politically and by undermining the public trust in fairly elected government representatives.  It’s hard to gauge the MLA or Heroes on this because the story skittishly avoids depicting representative government of any kind.

—(…)—

Point 14: Newspeak.

From the Orwell concept, Ur-Fascism limits the vocabulary and syntax of its members, preferring hot button code words and simplistic rhetoric, thus making complex thought and critical reasoning both difficult and inherently suspect.  Commonly cited examples are Orwell’s IngSoc and the huge amount of Nazi terminology that—like IngSoc—has the explicit intent of obscuring the meaning of words, especially in ways that downplay the severity or atrocity they’re being used to describe.  I recently saw the ever-popular “unalive” described in this way as well; though words like that began as a way to allow people to discuss serious topics in spaces that are unfriendly to such discussion, popularizing them beyond such spaces has the effect of diminishing the seriousness of the realities the words describe.

Team Hero: (...) Nearly as foundational as Hero and Villain, there’s the term for the setting’s superpowers themselves—originally meta-abilities, now quirks.  In-universe, the change came about specifically as a way for a struggling government to make something many people still saw as unacceptable, acceptable.  This is an issue particularly because the term chosen was used to justify legislation that directly opposed the spirit of that same term.  A word intended to describe meta-abilities as just another aspect of a person, one they should be able to live with freely, was instead used to help pass laws restricting their use.  Further, a very descriptive word for a phenomenon that still had not reached popular acceptance was replaced with a cuter, more familiar, more casual word that totally sacrificed descriptiveness in favor of attempting to force a top-down reframing of that phenomenon.

—(…)—

FINAL SCORES: MLA 4.5 | Team Hero 4 | Meta-Narrative 6.5

Conclusion: The aspects of the Meta-Liberation Army that obviously say “fascist” to the audience—the militancy, the contempt for the weak, the willingness to murder people who disagree with them—are all very easy to recognize and, moreover, recognize as Bad.  Conversely, the fascistic traits of the Heroes—and they hit many of the same ones as the MLA!—are much less visible.  This is in large part due to the meta-narrative: where its sympathies lie and how it guides the reader’s expectations, especially readers who are not used to applying this sort of Doylist scrutiny to their media intake.

For example, I said when talking about the “Action for action’s sake” criterion that its particular brand of anti-intellectualism is relatively common in shounen comics.  Sure, it’s nice and obvious that anti-intellectualism is Bad when it takes the form of Scarecrow telling the mob not to collect themselves, but Scarecrow’s words, functionally speaking, are little different than All Might praising Deku’s brainless, unthinking Heroic Instincts—if anything, I’d say All Might is worse!  The difference is in how the story frames them: Scarecrow is somehow both raving zealot and calculating bad faith actor, and he winds up arrested and forgotten about, while Deku follows All Might’s encouragement all the way to a climax in which he murders Shigaraki for lack of any effort put into thinking about how to save him, and this act of “heroism” changes both the weather and the world.

———

Read the rest here!

Thanks for reading along with these, everyone - or for reading it now, if you were holding off until the whole thing was available! If you enjoyed it and would like to support me in further endeavors like this one, my only current paid tier is only $3, or you can drop something over in my ko-fi. (And to the kind strangers who have done the latter over the last few weeks, thank you very much for your kindness and support!)

[zuzusexytiems]

ReiJean barely gets any official art you don't need to ruin their parade by complaining about no JP??? Besides it's just them standing beside each other its not a big deal!

also no do not send shippy stuff to japanese studios, big no no in Japanese fandom. They will never post any romantic fanon ship stuff unless it is canon to the show which in this case only EreMika and AruAni is the confirmed couple.

lmao, I'm allowed to be sad about my ship not getting official art. did you hear me say "I wish reijean never got the crumb" or that aruani and eremika and levihan never got the crumb? no. I said I was sad that my ship never got the crumb.

you're saying "it's not a big deal", and yet here you are complaining in my inbox on anon about it. if it truly wasn't a big deal, you wouldn't have cared what I (or anyone) thought, nor would you have gone through the trouble to message me about this.

you also don't have a say in what people should and shouldn't care about! you can't tell people "you shouldn't do this, or you shouldn't think or feel this way" because the fact is, my feelings are real, and you, a stranger, don't have the right to invalidate them. I don't know you, and I doubt that we're friends, because no friend of mine would come at me like this. so really, tell me why in the world should I listen to you or do as you say, especially since 1.) you're a stranger, and 2.) you've said it to me so disrespectfully?

if you truly are so bothered by what I feel, then unfollow me, mute me, or block me. no one is forcing you to be here, and me being sad about jeanpiku not getting crumbs has no effect on your life whatsoever. reijean and every other ship that got the crumb will continue to exist and celebrate regardless if I'm sad about jeanpiku or not. again, you said "it's no big deal" and that it doesn't matter. so if it's no big deal, then why are you here?

lastly:

"do not send shippy stuff to japanese studios" anon, I'm a little concerned that you care too much about what strangers do on the internet. again, like I said, nothing I do will have an effect on you or the things you enjoy.

ask yourself: in the slim chance that I ever do end up contacting mappa, will that action have an effect on you, and how you enjoy your own interests? no, it won't. so again, why do you care?

I would suggest you do something more productive with your time than lurk on my profile if you dislike my opinions so much. please save us both the trouble and just block me. I will genuinely be thankful for it.

PS if you didn't know: while they aren't my main ship, I'm also a reijean shipper, have reijean friends, and have made posts about liking reijean on twitter. perhaps I did sound a bit bitter on my post about the lack of jeanpiku, and I apologize if anyone felt hurt by that, but in no way did I ever come after the reijean community or any other community for the matter.

PPS, you talk about "ruining reijean's parade" but notice how I never tagged their ship name nor bothered anyone about it (unlike you). I just expressed being sad about MY ship on my OWN account and my OWN space, which I'm entitled to do.

again, please spend your energy on more fruitful matters.

[l-in-the-light]

Beatifully said. This post deserves so much more attention, it's so heartfelt and real.

I also think Law is often mischaracterized in fanfiction, which is fine in general (ooc characters or alternative takes can be really cool too and often are), but it feels like there's no place for canon Law anymore anywhere, everyone is just projecting their desires and favourite tropes on him, and his own voice is not heard anymore as the result... which means we should talk a lot about canon Law, especially because he's so easy to just dismiss. He's introverted, grumpy, tsundere, and all of that is valid and true (he can also be an emo hipster, a nerdy loser or an insufferable, always complaining moody teen, if that's what you fancy the most imagining him as), but he's also traumatized, and if no one wants to talk about it, I guess I will. It's a part of him the same way lying is part of Usopp and stinginess is part of Nami.

Let me share with you one of the most striking (for me) images from the anime adaptation of Law's flashback, because I think it illustrates the original post really well:

"sometimes you just can’t show emotions the way you used to because part of the trauma is that there was no time to show them, no use to show them because you were surviving because you’ve seen terrible things and crying was for nothing. It served no purpose and any type of “showing emotions” was used against you so you just learned to repress them so hard that it became impossible to show them."

This anime shot always gets me. Law had to supress his reactions, emotions and pain so he can survive, and most of the time he achieves that by staying quiet and not moving. It's even more underlined by the fact he literally was rendered mute by Cora-san's spell later, which also ended up saving his life. Anime doesn't always keep up to that (and his seiyuu delivers a lot of grunts, but they're still mostly grunts, huffing and half-supressed sounds), but in the manga? Law's reactions are still pretty much muted, even when he's an adult. Most are just "...!!" and variations of that, even when freaking Doflamingo shoots him, Law supresses his cries, either not to give him satisfaction or because supressing gives him a sense of control over the helpless situation; it's probably both, but it's also a result of his PTSD imo.

His reaction to being shot is just "!!!" (which can be interpreted as expression of inner turmoil/pain or perhaps a grunt, the latter is how anime usually interprets it)

And again, he seems way too used to supressing, it's definitely his first instinct reaction to any sort of pain or danger. Even when he's defeated by Blackbeard and in real risk of dying right there, Law chose to be silent (while obviously also being in huge pain).

The only times he actually screams and cries out in Dressrosa arc is when Doflamingo severs his arm (he couldn't move while it was happening, so the pain kinda released him from freezing up, by screaming he regained back his control over his body. He still gathers himself really quickly afterwards) and when Doflamingo is about to stomp his skull into the ground:

He still tries to cover his eyes and lowers his initial volume too, trying to hide and not show his emotions openly. It really hits hard, because this is his failure, his moment, he's allowed to feel it to the fullest, but he still tries to stop himself from it.

He tries so hard to regain his control, but by doing that he's also just succumbing to his traumatic response. This visceral struggle is what made him survive all this time: supress, keep quiet, withstand the pain no matter what.

He also doesn't even flinch when Big Mom is beating him up while he's at the end of his strength and pushing himself even more over his limit for this last attack.

I guess it's not very obvious, because we start Punk Hazard with Law writhing and crying whenever someone squeezes his heart. Besides that, his pain reactions are always supressed, sometimes to the extreme too. Makes one wonder...

Even after Cora-san's spell wears off, Law's pain and crying gets muted by other sounds around. Technically he's allowed to express himself, but in reality he's still not being heard.

Some psychological research says there's a link between abuse and silence, and fictional stories sometimes touch upon that. For example, if you take away the voices of the victims, it's like the harm and pain never happened, because no one knows and those who do know will never talk about it. If you constantly hear the suffering voices in your head, you will have to appease them or they will never leave you alone, taking over your life. But there are other ways to make them go quiet, like by literally forcing them, especially if there's no hope to get justice. Anything to survive.

After reading more Law’s Pov’s on fics I’ve realized that sometimes people misinterpret Law a lot, if you read Law’s novel you realize that he is thoughtful, more tender than he appears to be and inclined to profound reflections about existential issues. I do think that I get why it happens as a person with PTSD, sometimes you just can’t show emotions the way you used to because part of the trauma is that there was no time to show them, no use to show them because you were surviving because you’ve seen terrible things and crying was for nothing. It served no purpose and any type of “showing emotions” was used against you so you just learned to repress them so hard that it became impossible to show them. You learn to rationalize and micro analyse everything because your fucking life can depend on you hability to do so. So yeah I get that many people people would look at you and misinterpret you as “not caring”  or “cold” because you might be running thousands equations thinking about the risks of trusting someone, since you are so low energy you literally can’t afford another pseudoargument or anything that would just make you lose any more times because you never had time to begin with. It is living in borrowed time every single minute expecting the other shoe to drop. Anyway, I’m not comparing my trauma to Law’s his is way bigger than mine, but the little things, yeah I get them. 

Just a little rambling here to the void as always. 

[braedenhales]

HANNAH WADDINGHAM& BRETT GOLDSTEIN AS REBECCA WELTON&ROY KENT IN TED LASSO [2020-2023]

[lambmotifz]

sam literally offering himself to dean in 2.11 playthings, and dean not giving it to him because he doesn’t want to “ruin” his little brother

and this is why sam would initiate. AND he would prefer to bottom

[tomurakii]

I do think character design diversity is important but pls let's not act like the boys in dandadan are diverse when they're all skinny white-skinned generically attractive boys with ONE exception

The point of the post wasn't even so much diversity as it was just character distinguishability. Whether you think Okarun's design is "attractive" or not he still has notably different features and a different build from Jiji, meanwhile Momo and Aira are identical aside from their hair and eyebrows.

And then there's obviously the aliens.

Where the male ones look weird in their base forms and have even weirder transformations, but the one female alien just happens to be a girl with antenna 100% of the time.

This weird need for female characters to be one specific kind of attractive all the time just gets in the way of decent character design.