#but that's not really something actionable for me rn

[gem-de-lune]

The vibes are weird, guys....

I know I said I would do itty bitty pieces of the vibe check- but this is giving top secret and I am getting that it will not be ok to divulge this information in depth to the collective and even I do not know some details and am being blocked here.

Therefore for a few days, I will be suspending daily vibe check on how seunghan and the members feel unless another huge shift occurs. I will still do readings regarding our chances and what we need to do and possibly SM's vibes towards the situation. But I am being told that this is not something to dig into rn for fear of a butterfly effect and that this may be prolonged. I won't be able to protect this info if i do vibe checks normally.

What I CAN tell yall: Seunghan is okay. The members are also Okay.

The Chariot card:

That we continue to associate with RII7E popped out in regards to how he is feeling.

I did this reading 2 times, meaning i pulled different spreads twice and used both my deck above and the new deck I have been using for extra confirmations. I pulled the Magician twice. one from the new deck in the first read and again from the other deck in the 2nd read.

I pulled Justice from the new deck in BOTH readings.

I pulled 4 of cups twice once from each deck as well, which signifies a waiting period of sorts or delay due to contemplation.

Finally I pulled Ace of Wands from BOTH decks.

Magician, Justice, 4 of Cups, Ace of Wands.

Know this: this is how Seunghan currently feels, and it is starkingly different from this morning. It is positive. Why? Because something else has occurred since that reading. Something unexpected. Something has shifted.

I cannot elaborate more on these pulls and what they mean because i am getting literal ringing in my ears that "that's enough". I am even getting this may not be okay. Might delete later.

But I am going to leave it at the pull i did for if Seunghan still wants to be in Riize:

It's a strong yes. There is a strong unbreakable connection and intention to move forward together here. I deeply apologize. I cannot speak any more on this and have to literally walk away from my desk as I say this. Getting aches and my ear is itchy inside.

Guides are quite literally telling me to stfu rn.

All I can say is please please trust and have faith. Do not give up. My next reading will be on the actions we need to take. But I want yall to know that nothing is over just yet and that there is something being hidden.

Please....trust and wait a bit.

P.S. to clarify, just in case- Seunghan is NOT feeling positive abt the solo debut. His mind is on a completely separate event entirely. He does not really want to go solo. That's why the Chariot popped up. Let's use our brains por favor.

[ahamkara-apologist]

Everyone in my notes rn:

But yeah y'all articulated some points that I think I was struggling to come across, which is that the fact that what makes Eramis's past as a mother important isn't so much that she's A Mom(tm) (though she is naturally a caretaker/protector, which has a major overlap), it's that her past experiences as a mother greatly inform her decisions and actions. While it is still a core part of her and is essential to understanding her pain, her motivations, and how she works with other people, the major point of relevance that this fact has is how it enhances her leadership and what it thematically means for the fate of the Eliksni, which is a title that she shares with Misraaks.

What I really like too is how the game itself presents this fact. Almost all of our interactions with Eramis show us, first and foremost, the fact that she is a powerful leader, a formidable warrior, and a cunning politician. She's fierce, she's angry, she's full of rightous hatred, she's stubborn as a brick wall and she will do whatever it takes to see her goals bear fruit. We hear from the Brays about how dangerous she is and how she needs to be broken, we fight her and she roars at us about how we brought nothing but ruin to her kind, of how much she hates gods and all their meddling and the ruin they bring. Variks has us break her, and then he has us break her House.

And then it gives us an exotic armour piece called 'Athrys's Embrace,' which has only an old Eliksni lullaby as its loretab. And then it shows us this.

And then it contextualizes a lot more things that we might have brushed over before. Why Riis-Reborn was so successful, before the Darkness got its hooks in her: why the Witness was able to lure her so easily into thoughts of empires and vengence. She's not just your typical power-hungry Kell- when she spoke of breaking chains and creating a refuge for her people, she was being genuine. She does not care about her own status, but to ensure that her people are not helpless. When she tempers herself and speaks softly to Eido, it's not because she's being manipulative or just tolerating her, it's because she's a genuinely kind person who has been broken and starved and hurting for so long that she's caught in perpetual fight-or-flight mode. The fact that she was known to be a nurturing, loving mother and wife gives us a window into the nature of her grief and allows us to understand her flawed worldview and biases, but that's not what her character is entirely about- it's not even what's driving her right now. Who she is now is the Kell of House Salvation. Her lost family is merely a facet of who she is outside of that.

One thing else that I kind of noticed that's more a D2 appreciation thing is that D2 has, by far, the most amount of female characters in it where being a mother or caretaker figure is not essential to their storyline or motivations. Eramis legitimately is the only one that I can think of off of the top of my head. Most of our ladies are either entirely childless and show no inclinations to change that, are traumitized by being forced into the role of a mother figure at far too young of an age (Mara), or do not have a motherly vibe to them in the slightest. Hell, even most of the moms we have are kinda pretty terrible- just look at Inaaks and Savathun (Savathun especially is god fucking awful at being a mom. Like. She has negative mom rizz its kinda insane). Eramis is the only one who gives me actual mom vibes out of the whole cast and it's something that I really, really enjoy, bc unlike the rest of the female cast, it actually has thematic implications for the wider works than just shoehorning her into the role bc that's what women do

okay disclaimer: ik that categorizing female characters as the 'mom friend/figure' is a legit disease in fandom caused by general misogynistic views of female characters, and it's something that personally greatly irritates me bc its not only awful to do, it also tends to ruin the characters its put upon. ESPECIALLY in D2, which is outstanding in its cast of strong female characters

however. in the case of Eramis, I do believe that the fact that she was a mother and is a genuinely caring, nurturing person at heart is something that is a deeply important core part of her character, as well as thematically important to the future of the Eliskni moving forward. It's important because in her case, I believe that her motherly inclinations are why, pre-Witness-whispering-through-the-Darkness, Eramis was such a successful kell- because unlike some other kells who sought a future for the Eliksni via domination, her main focus for them was to create a haven for her people that could be defended from Lightbearers. Riis-Reborn wasn't something to sniff at- it was the closest thing to an actual Eliksni city in a very long while. What got her was her trauma of the Whirlwind and her desire to destroy the Traveler to level the playing field for everyone involved- trauma that the Witness preyed upon in order to get to us. Like a parasite, seeking its secondary host. Eramis certainly is not the only Eliksni who lost her family during the Whirlwind, but I think that her specific brand of anger is closest to that of a mother lion whose cubs are in danger, and is lashing out in a furious fight-or-flight reflex at anything that she perceives as a threat. It's just that in this case, her 'cubs' were the Eliksni as a whole, and the threat she perceived before the Witness started torturing her was the Traveler.

I also think that her relationship with parenthood also makes for a very interesting character contrast to Misraaks (aka the other successful kell viewed as a source of hope for the Eliksni), and helps to set them up as antiparallels to each other. Eramis was a gentle, nurturing mother with a reverence for the Traveler who turned into the bitter, cunning warrior we see now when she lost access to her wife and children; Misraaks was a fearsome, ruthless pirate before he became a father, which gentled him and turned him towards being more pious. Eramis represents the old ways, and offers hope to the Eliksni who cannot bear to cohabitate with humanity; Misraaks represents a change in the tide, and kells the open-minded Eliksni who are willing to lay down their arms to live among the humans of Sol. Misraaks is of Light (change, forgiveness, moving forward), while Eramis is of Darkness (memory, control, looking back). They're opposites in every way except for the fact that both of them were/are amazing parents, and I'd argue that their ability to nurture and overlook others is what led to their success as kells.

Most importantly, however, is their relationship to Eido, who represents the future of the Eliksni. Misraaks was her father, and he did his best to raise her to be kind and openminded, but he also shielded her from the horrors of the past a little too well. She's outgrown that, and now that she's strong enough to handle said horrors, Eramis has been acting as a mentor to fully introduce her to the tragedy of what she lost and why elder Eliksni are so angry about it- and I don't think that she would have been receptive to Eido attempting to talk to her if it weren't for the fact that under all of her prickly armour, she's still that nurturing person at heart. It's her desire to care for others and to see a better future for her people that has kept her going despite her having no hope for herself, and it's that loving heart that has saved herself and her people from utter destruction at both our hands and Fikrul's- because if she didn't look at eido and go 'oh this child is the future of our people and i must protect her with my life', then both her and the rest of House Salvation would have been marked for death. And now here she is, continuing to care for Eido even as her father declines by telling her stories about Riis and helping her track down an apothecary to try to cure him, despite her not believing in his ways. I don't think it's entirely because she used to be a mother, but...I do think that it's playing a huge role in it.

(I also think it's personally fascinating to see how someone who used to be known for being a doting, sweet mom to her hatchlings and a caring mate to her wife can turn into someone who's a terrifying warrior on the battlefield and a cunning, politically saavy ruler, but even then, that doesn't surprise me all that much- if you've got a dearth of experience wrangling hatchlings, then being kell of a house is basically just wrangling a bunch of grown-up hatchlings. Same principles, just upped a level or two in complexity.)

[eleplay]

rubbing my temples. okay. if i do another lark illustration in the future, i should at the very least make it something that could feasibly be print material

[13eyond13]

love it when a character that's hard to read intuitively for you has like a dedicated fandom interpreter who can just glance at their blank face in a panel and then give you a 3k word essay on their innermost thoughts & desires & fears and neatly tie it back into the themes & whatnot as if it's the most obvious thing in the world

[seekingthestars]

besties i was doing SO good after my week off at the beginning of july, i was feeling more relaxed and able to deal with things and enjoying things i haven't been able to enjoy in ages!!

and then.

say hello to ✨family emergency no.???✨ Y'ALL I AM TIRED

[pink-vulpix]

.

[1punch]

" Now that I think about it... I have the sensation I never had that happening. Could say I never paid it any mind either. It's not like I don't especially like it, not a complex either. However, is it really ok? No... can't be ok. Can't help but think it's something I lost in the daily battles towards becoming a hero. Am I supposed to have this issue more in mind? Come to think of it, I didn't really have time to unpack it... if it was a normal guy then... "

---

" That’s not the point... I have the feeling that things like a heart to heart interaction, sharing an umbrella, warmth, are all things broken away in my life. Other people can have things like big events and circumstances happening, romances and such bringing happiness in their daily lives. I have the feeling something broke, and that sweet-like fluffy, nice stuff just fell right off from me. That's what I meant. "

[platypusisnotonfire]

My DM after having been adding features to my character on DnDBeyond: oh my GOD you have so many weapons how do you have so many weapons good grief

As if he, playing all the Shopkeeps, wasn’t the one selling them all to me 😂

[ifyourereadingthisblinktwice]

i need to stop forgetting things exist the fucking second they leave my field of vision. why is is impossible for two things to occupy my mind at once especially when im tired. like. i feel like a sim. i feel like actions are being canceled and i just. move on. and completely forget what i was doing moments before. i fucking hate it

[keeps-ache]

ouhh the tired __(xox _/ )\__

[barkingangelbaby]

hmmmmm

[korattata]

.

[starlornn]

I know I'm super Cardinal and starting things and making plans is Our Thing, but sometimes? It feels like no one else even wants to do ANYTHING with us. We have to start SO MANY plans and make sure they even happen. We never get any thanks for trying to keep things alive and connected in relationships, be they platonic/romantic/familial

[knightdykes]

it's taken me two hours to watch 40 minutes of lotr :( maybe I should switch to a different movie bc this is a struggle

[no1ryomafan]

Yknow one thing I hate to do is compare mechas given they’re all pretty different even putting the clear influence a lot have on each other aside and I don’t like the idea that I’ve seen a lot of mecha fans subscribe to where “if you like this one show you HAVE to like these other ones” but this is less of a comparison thing especially because I’m not petty or anything since it’s just something I thought about:

Mazinger v Getter when it comes to their recognition tends to boggle my mind a bit. Since it feels like there are more dedicated Getter fans around that talk about it than Mazinger fans, but Mazinger is more recognizable to the point it gets more funded stuff than Getter.

I was thinking about this when I was watching Mazinkaiser, and I can’t confirm this but I found it interesting that it almost (felt) like this ova spawned out of Getter making a comeback before Mazinger did, since Armageddon came before and was massive hit, than was followed up with a game + shin vs neo by the time Mazinkaiser was made. Like they even got Armas art director to work on it and the studio doing it was Brains Base who made the getter OVAs.

And in terms of recently all the stuff with Grendizer, which I know was SUPPOSED to get another an anime way before this, is now finally getting something coincidentally after Getter Robo Arc. And everyone is already pointing out between the two Grendizer looks waaay better then Arc so it’s clear it has more money put into it, yet I wonder if Arc didn’t happen if they would bother to touch Grendizer since Arc was them also finally giving the Getter team who NEVER got to be in a anime- well, a anime. And now the most neglected pilot apart of Mazingers universe is getting his own show.

I understand why Mazinger is more known and funded since it was the first self piloted mecha and something Go Nagai, a man who arguably changed the industry a lot, made so his works are always gonna be rebooted for the sake of memory, where as Getter sorta lives in Nagai’s shadow sadly even if Ishikawa memory is respected, but I feel like almost Getter is the one to test if things will work and then they’ll see if they can do stuff with Mazinger again.

Or maybe it’s just two coincidences and we’re just going through a long coming mecha renaissance of older properties of the genre, but I’m still rotating it heavily.

[ladysophiebeckett]

now that it's the next day and im less annoyed, two things i thought was interesting in the mexican adaptation--

when the gaslighting arc starts, lety's like 'yeah we should go back to omar's place' and fernando, instead of being excited about it, he's scared bc she had told him various times she didn't want to bc of 'guilt'. so he's in the bathroom pacing, worried bc 'this isn't like her'. which i thought was funny.

when they go to the event and she tells him she needs to leave bc someone came to get her, he assumes its her dad and he immediately is like 'i'll talk to him' and she says 'no , it's tomas' and he grabs her hands and she pulls back and says 'ppl can see' and he says 'i dont care'. she insists she's leaving and he can't make her stay bc they're not at work. but he doesn't care and drags her away.

that is as 'dark' as the scene gets. bc the next scene its back to light hearted comedy where he's flirting with her again. they really don't want to go there with him (making him crazy), which is disappointing.