#but that could also be from the lack of sleep.

[manicmanuscription]

The Right Time

Feysand x Reader

Word Count: 13674

Warnings: Angst, Possible Medical Inaccuracies, Fluff, Love Confessions, Delirium, Lack of Sleep, Depression? Panicking, Dissociation.

Summary: Reader is a new single mom, and she pushed away her only support system determined to prove she could do it on her own. But on a bad sleeping night she's slipping. Luckily her mates are there to pick her up.

A/N: I've been really obsessed with baby/pregnancy fic's lately due to baby fever, but I have never actually been pregnant before so a lot of this stuff is based on information from family members or other fanfic's. So a lot of this might not be correct. This fic has also been playing in my head after a shit ton of pregnancy fics i read so there might be grammatical errors!

─── ♡ ───

You didn’t know what you expected your life to be when you were just a faeling but it certainly wasn’t like this…

Living in a small cottage nestled in the countryside of Velaris, a wailing baby in your arms, bags under your eyes, no ring on your finger and no baby daddy in sight. Your house was an absolute mess but you didn’t have the energy or time to clean, you would’ve hired a maid but ever since your daughter was born a few weeks ago your paranoia had skyrocketed. It didn’t help that you were a valued member of the Inner Circle and not only had your life been threatened numerous times but you had been attacked just as many. 

You never expected it to be this hard though. Andromeda was squealing at the top of her lungs and you were sobbing right along with her. Rocking her up and down and desperately trying to figure out what was wrong. Not only were you still recovering from your intense labor and your homones all over the place but it was impossible to get any sleep, if your lovely daughter wasn’t having difficulty latching and by some miracle she had fallen asleep for longer than forty five minutes than you were staring at the wall cooconed in blankets a deep sense of dread overcoming every sense in your body made it diffuclt to fall asleep.

Anxiety kept your eyes awake at the thought that something would go wrong the second you let yourself relax. Your body would pass out from sheer exhaustion and Andromeda’s cries would awaken you and you started the whole song and dance over again. 

You were so, so, tired. Your mind had you seeing shadows moving across the floor and you could barely stand up straight. It was a miracle that fae get pregnant, conception taking years at a time and even then the pregnancy and labor extremely diffuclt, a lot of fae not surviving the process. You knew you were incredibley lucky to have a daughter, to have the chance to hold her and you loved her fiercely with ever fiber in your being yet you couldn’t help but regret everything.

You wished you never went to that club, never met that male, you wished that male had stayed instead of running in the opposite direction and you wished to all gods that you hadn’t pushed away your only support system, determined to prove you could do it on your own. 

Your family had been a shining star during all of this. Especially your High Lady and Lord, Rhysand and Feyre knew the deep intracies of pregnancy better than most after everything they had been through with Nyx.

Theey had stuck to your side the second they learned you were pregnant. Taking turns holding your hair back as you violently threw up from intense morning sickness, got all your cravings the second you mentioned it, held your bump when the weight started hurting your back or rubbed your feet when your ankles swelled.

They even forced you to stay at their house for weeks at a time so they could take care of you and when you insisted you were becoming a burden and returned home they had made themselves comfortable on your couch before you felt guilty and returned to the River House if only to save their spines. 

You had tried pulling away from them, guilt eating you alive every second of your pregnancy. Their actions didn’t help the absolute massive crush you had on them, in fact it only increased your adoration for them which made you shame spiral. The second your daughter was born you knew you couldn’t continue leaning on them for support, it only hurt you at the end of the day when you remembered they were mated, they had each other and a son and despite their overly flirty comments and lingering touches that just ended up causing more confusion. There was no room for you, you couldn’t keep pining after them when you needed to focus on Andromeda.

You told them you needed space, practically shoving them out the door even after they had spent 18 hours holding your hand’s and helping you deliver your beautiful daughter. Of course they had straight up refused your attempt to push them away and stayed with you a few days after labor, helping take care of you during the harsh after effects. But you finally kicked them out throwing out some cruel word’s that would haunt you to this day. Andromeda needed her mother to be present and emotionally healthy and you couldn’t provide that if you keep second guessing and overthinking every brush against your hand or every comment about your eyes. 

You could do this, you had to do this. You needed to be the best mother you could be for your little star. 

Yet you couldn’t even do that because she would not. stop. crying. The sound shredded your heart to pieces and guilt and shame turned the shattered bits of you to dust. She was fed, clean and warm and you couldn’t figure out why she kept crying. The thought made you feel like a horrible mother and you let out another sob at the same time as Andromeda as you bounced her up and down, forcing your numb feet to pace the room. “Please, please just go to sleep.” You begged. “I don’t know what’s wrong.” Your voice cracked and you spiraled at the scream she let out. 

You couldn’t do this. 

It was too hard, you were a horrible friend and an even worse mother and you didn’t deserve this little miracle in your arms. A better female would be able to handle it. You couldn’t do this, you couldn’t do this, you couldn’t- 

“Oh Angel.” A soft voice broke and you turned to find Feyre and Rhys standing there, you opened your mouth to say something but Rhys was moving the instant your eyes met their’s. As soon as he was a breath away from you he reached for Andromeda, saying something about help yet the words were distorted and muffled in your exhaustive state, soft arms gripped your shoulders and you almost fell over at the weight of your baby being removed as Rhysand gently pried her away from you and into his arms, a smile gracing his elegant features.

You were too tired to fight, to do anything to protest as Feyre led you away from the bedroom and into the adjoining bathroom. She was saying something too but you didn’t hear it, all your last remaining energy focused on listening for Andromeda, making sure she was ok. Feyre titled your chin to look up at her and she pressed a soft kiss to your cheek. Your mind suddenly sharpening as her magic brushed against your mental walls as she forced you to listen to her. “She’ll be fine Sweetheart, Rhys has got her, now let me take care of you.” 

Everything felt so far away as if you were dreaming, moving through life in a haze as Feyre gently undressed you and settled you in a warm bath. She washed your hair and body and massaged your shoulders, whispering word’s of comfort that did not reach you as you floated away from your body. She fed you fruit and cheese’s your body chewing the food on autopilot. When was the last time you ate? 

The food and Feyre constantly touching you slowly brought you back down to earth. To the reality of your hunger, your tiredness, how sore all your muscles were and to the lack of Andromeda crying, you could hear Rhysand humming lowly through the crack in the door and the occasional creak of the floorboards as he calmed your daughter down. The thought had tears lining your eyes again. “She hates me.” You whimpered and Feyre brushed your tears away with the pads of her thumbs. “No she doesn’t.” Feyre she affirmed confidently. 

You shook you head in disagreement. “I can’t do anything right Fey, I said all those nasty things to you a-and I couldn’t even get her to sleep, and I’m so tired. I wasn’t cut out for this alright? I’m going to fuck her up so badly, I’ll ruin everything.” You were sobbing again, a broken sound tearing from your throat and the sound looked like it physically pained her. “Andromeda adores you alright love? We can all see it, she never looks at anyone the way she looks at you.  Your so attuned to her, you love her so fiercely and that’s the most important part. Your doing your amazing love. You’re not going to fuck anything up. You’re an amazing female and you’re an amazing mother. I forgive you, so does Rhys. We just want to make sure your ok.”

You let the words sink in, your heart beating wildly out of her chest as you cried at the tenderness of her words. “Why are you dong this to me?” You asked brokenly, you felt as if they were pulling you in all different directions. “Why are you saying all of these things when-“ when you’re mated. Were the unspoken words. But you couldn’t say that, you’d never say that and ruin whatever pieces of friendship you had. 

“When what?” Feyre asked softly as she stroked your damp hair.  

“When- I- I-“ You stuttered not knowing what to say as your mind panicked at the close confession you’d almost made. “Why are supporting me like this.” You instead asked, needing to know why they had stayed so close to your side and pulled at your heart strings so violently. “Just..why Feyre? Go home, to your son. I’ll be fi-“

“If you finish that sentance I swear to the gods-“ Rhysand exhaled heavily from the now open doorway,. “Rhys.” Feyre warned but he brushed her off as he crossed the room and  kneeled in front of the bathtub, gripping your face in between his large hands. “Do you not see how much we love you? How much we care for you. I think we have made it obvious Angel. You are our mate. Just please- please let us help you.” The last part sounded like a desperate plea, a whine leaving his lips and you didn’t have it into you to be shocked that the High Lord and Lady of the Night Court were kneeling beside you, begging. your heart froze at the love confession. 

“Wait…What?” You asked slowly, waiting for them to tell you this was all a big joke. You couldn’t believe this, you couldn’t let yourself hope. Feyre was giving Rhysand an annoyed glare but at your voice she turned to you, her expression to shifting to one of hope. “You are our mate darling.” She whispered, entertwining a tattooed hand with your’s, water dripping onto the rug, reminding you that were naked in a bathtub and an embarrassed flush crept up your cheeks. 

“And we love you.” Rhys added once again, brushing a piece of hair behind your ear.

“We didn’t want to tell you like this, especially not right now.” Feyre added with a pointed tone, giving her - your -  mate another glare. The High Lord just rolled his eyes. “I’m tired of waiting for the right time Feyre.” 

You were pretty sure your heart was beating a milllion miles per hour and you couldn’t help but let out a small chuckle that turned into a delirous laugh. Their brows furrowed and expressions shifted to something more broken at that and you immediately apologized as you gasped for breath in between your laughter. “I- just.” Your voice cracked as you started talking, regaining some wisdom. “Do you know how long I’ve been in love with the two of you?” You whispered, your voice coming out in a high pitched tone as you tried to get it out all in one breath. “I felt so guilty-“ Lips crashed onto yours. The addicting scent of lilac and pear completely invading your senses as your gorgeous mate kissed you. Fireworks exploded in your chest and all of a sudden it felt like you could breath again. 

You felt as if you had arrived home as you finally allowed yourself to recognize the glowing bond in your chest instead of gaslighting yourself and pushing it down. It was overwhelming to feel the surge of emotions on your mates side and exhilarating all at the same time. Feyre moaned as your tugged on her bottom lip possessively. Soon her lips trailed down your neck and shoulder and a new set of lips met your own. 

Rhysand was different than Feyre yet just as addicting as his tongue clashed against yours, immediately taking control of the kiss. 

After a few more minutes of your mate’s overwhelmingly beautiful touch and you finally pulled away, panting hard. “What..What about Andromeda?” You asked timidly, knowing you would put her above yourself always, if they didn’t want another child than you couldn’t do this. Couldn’t allow yourself to hope only to crash and burn later. 

Rhysand hummed softly, taking one of your hands and kissing the inside of your wrist. “What about her darling?”

“Do…you still want me? She’s not your-“

Feyre gripped your chin firmly once again, directing your eyes to hers. “Andromeda is ours just as much as Nyx is.” 

“Your ours, Andromeda is ours. Nothing is going to change that.” Rhys agreeded with just as much conviction os Feyre. You almost started crying once again, completely overwhelmed by the revelations of the night and Feyre hummed softly as they both remembered why they were here in the first place. To take care of you and their daughter. Rhysand got up and grabbed a fluffy bath robe and you don’t remember buying and Feyre helped you out of the bath stealing a quick kiss from you. “There’s still so much we have to do and talk about.” You mentioned as Rhys slid your arms into the robe. He pressed a soft kiss to your forehead. “We can talk later, let’s get you into bed Sweetheart.” You could feel the adrenaline  from the night starting to wear off as Feyre led you to the bedroom. Your daughter finally snoring softly in the crib next to the bed.

They dressed you in your favorite PJ’s and each pressed a kiss to your lips before tucking you in the bed, Rhys magically changing the sheets with a snap of his fingers. 

Feyre snuggled in beside you, running her nails along your spine and Rhys sat on the end, massaging your sore feet as they forced the usual dread and anxiety away and for the first time in weeks you allowed yourself to finally relax at your mate’s gentle touch, your body completely melting underneath them. One hand gripping your daughter’s finger through the bars of her crib and one hand holding onto Feyre’s as you drifted off to sleep

[warblogs17282]

A look at Stolas' 'happy pills' withdrawal symptoms in Sinsmas.

So, I've been looking at withdrawal effects of antidepressants following Sinsmas, more specifically, SSRIs. More specifically, I found this section:

Symptoms that may feel like your original problem:

anxiety

crying spells

depersonalisation (feeling detached from your surroundings)

depression

disturbed sleep

fatigue (feeling very weary)

mania

mood swings

poor concentration and memory

suicidal thoughts.

Source for this can be found here:

Anxiety: Pretty clear to me that Stolas has always had at least some undercurrent of anxiety flowing within him throughout the episode, starting from his first attempt to call Octavia at the start of the episode. Plus it's also pretty clear during this scene that Stolas is definitely feeling quite a lot of anxiety, I would include the Moxxie and Millie fighting moments but you could explain that one away with Stolas not exactly being accustomed to Sinsmas traditions, even if his anxiety is heightened due to withdrawal symptoms.

Crying Spells: 100%, we see Stolas break into two crying spells upon the realization that he is now poor, and another when the client sinner is recapping the story that led up to this point that hit almost exactly to home for Stolas.

Depersonalisation: Yep, Stolas may have taken another dose of his happy pills by this point, although we weren't shown that on screen, but following the conflict with Octavia, in these two scenes you can just see how detached from the world Stolas is at those moments.

Depression: It's been made pretty obvious that Stolas has depression, so I'm counting this one as a yes.

Disturbed Sleep: Don't think this one applies to Stolas.

Fatigue: Considering that a definition of the term 'weary' is 'very tired or lacking energy and enthusiasm', while this doesn't apply to Stolas all that much during the episode, there's definitely some spells of it throughout the episode, like this one for example.

Mania: Looking at the same website here, there's a few things under the 'how you might feel and behave' sections for mania that I do believe applies to Stolas here, which is pretty much all contained within two scenes.

'Irritable and agitated': We have this entire scene where Stolas loses his shit over a spam call, mainly because he thought it was Octavia calling him back but still.

'Very confident or adventurous': Would say adventurous applies to Stolas here, as most definitions of the word adventurous involve risk and/or danger, and well, in the line before this, Stolas very clearly identifies the potential risks he might be putting himself into by attempting to see Octavia, but goes ahead and does it anyways.

'Like you can perform physical and mental tasks better than normal': Probably applies here due to the absolute beatdown Stolas did on Andrealphus during this scene.

'Talking a lot, speaking very quickly, or not making sense to other people': Yep, see this scene again where Stolas proceeds to talk extremely quickly, which 100% does not make any sense to the other sinner within the room. This entire scene also probably counts for the point 'Saying or doing things that are inappropriate and out of character', plus 'Losing social inhibitions'.

'Being rude or aggressive': yet again, see the scene I just mentioned, and the whole 'you could shut the fuck up' line. (Although she did deserve being told that ngl.)

'Taking serious risks with your safety': I cover this in the 'Very confident or adventurous' section just a few paragraphs above.

With all of this being what I think applies to Stolas during this scene in regards to mania.

Mood Swings: You see Stolas have quite a few mood swings throughout the episode, some of which I have already quite clearly shown throughout this post, 100% applies to Stolas.

Poor concentration and memory: Potentially, although I'm struggling to think of any specific examples and I'm not entirely sure if this scene would fall under this category.

Finally, we have Suicidal Thoughts: Pretty heavy subject but I've said this before and I'll say it again, I'm pretty confident in saying that Stolas has quite high levels of suicidal ideation and/or is passively suicidal.

I love badass Stolas like the rest of you all do, but there's just something about Stolas facing death with absolutely zero fear that just screams to me that Stolas is passively suicidal, especially if we consider what Stolas did during Mastermind as well, however, I cannot fully confirm this at this time.

So while I cannot confirm that Stolas has suicidal thoughts going through him, I suspect that he might have because of my belief that Stolas has high levels of suicidal ideation and/or is passively suicidal.

I gotta give this show credit for depicting mental health realistically, because they really knocked it out of the park with Stolas' withdrawal symptoms as well.

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

YOUR L*ONISMS IN THE MALLEUS POST BYE 😭😭 I tend to try to avoid talking about him precisely bc I fear I'll sound like Leona too lmao. or bc I'm scared ppl will say "ah you only dislike him bc you like Leona"- when that's not the case at all (although I also share some of his views about the lizard) Similarly to you, I just don't get the hype- basically everything you say. my feelings for him fluctuate from "🙄 ok." to "you're okay? I guess?"

which is weird, bc I really like dragons and non-human characters learning about humans. but that's what makes it worse for me bc man all the talk about him made me want to rlly like him and then I saw him in canon and I was like uh... okay? kind of disappointed + a bit annoyed at some stuff. I do like how he talks about gargoyles or things he finds interesting tho— I'll praise you that much, Draconia.

[Referencing this post!]

***PLEASE NOTE: Everything I express in this post is my own opinion and is in no way meant to disparage Malleus enjoyers.***

Leona and Rollo is right about Malleus and he should speak his truth 😔

To reflect a little on my own character arc with Malleus, I felt very neutral about him from the prologue to about book 2ish. This was simply because I hadn't interacted with the guy yet so I held off on judging him prematurely. The brief encounter we actually had with Malleus in book 2 wasn't meaty enough for me to get a sense for his character, so I brushed him off.

I thought it was interesting that book 2's narrative invites comparisons between Leona and Malleus, with Leona being a parallel to Scar, Malleus being a parallel to Mufasa, and the world holding Malleus up as the "superior" king. Lilia states as much in 2-26: "Would that the lion king of the savanna could witness this absolute farce. No, if you ask me, the collar suits you far better than a crown ever could. You may bemoan the fact that you're not higher in line to be king. But with that sensitive ego of yours? That so quickly directs all your petty anger at your retainers... Well, the idea of you ever contending with a REAL king like our Malleus—is absolutely laughable. Even if you COULD defeat Malleus, so long as that's how you choose to conduct yourself? You would never be fit to rule!"

And at the time, yeah, Lilia's right because Leona is very much losing his grip on his emotions and acts irrationally in an attempt to triumph over Malleus. HOWEVER... The longer the main story went on, the more I found myself disagreeing with Lilia's judgment of Malleus and his character. Now, that doesn't mean that I think Leona was in the right for the actions he took in book 2 (they are still and always will be wrong). Rather, I think Lilia gave a somewhat biased take on Malleus and his preparedness for the throne. Many of the things Lilia accuses Leona of also ended up being very true of his own liege. Malleus has a sensitive ego (he has attempted to strike down peers and faceless, magicless NPCs on more than one occasion; ie Halloween events). Malleus has directed his anger at his retainers (as a child, he froze many servants; in book 7, he attacks Sebek and Silver for attempting to wake up their peers and tries to return Lilia to sleep against his wishes). Malleus has scarcely led anyone in anything. Leona and Malleus are far more similar to one another than either of them would like to admit, but Lilia is just assuming that Malleus will be a great leader anyway because of... what? Because of birthright and lineage? Yeah, no wonder why Leona is pissed and has a bone to pick with the lizard (attempt to harm Malleus aside).

Book 3 and onwards is what I started to develop my current dislike for Malleus. (And to be clear, he has good points too! I'm not saying that he has nothing going for him at all; however, this post is focusing on my own critiques of his character so that is what I will be speaking about.) I started to notice things that annoyed me on a personal level: how he lacks consideration of others' perspectives and actively violates their autonomy, how he never gets any repercussions for his actions, how he's aware of his power and status and yet fails to avoid lording it over others, how he has been given so many opportunities to learn and change as a person but refuses those opportunities, etc. And yes, I understand that he acts in these ways for particular reasons. I'm not saying that his behaviors don't make sense, I am only stating that these are behaviors that I personally don't find appealing. (For more extensive explanations of why I don't like Malleus, please see the FAQ section in my pinned post.) All of this in spite of how little of him we actually get to see and interact with, especially in the main story. It baffled me that he was undoubtably the most popular character in EN circles. There's so much chatter about Malleus Draconia, you can't really get away from it. People are legitimately shocked when you tell them you actively dislike Malleus or when they learn that he's not even a top contender for best boy in the JP fandom. The default is assuming that you do like Malleus, which ironically happens to be the same thing that Draconians (Malleus stans in-universe) do. It feels like there's sometimes an unspoken pressure to like the guy. I also started to notice peculiar behaviors (?) which, in a vacuum, aren't necessarily bad--I would just like to comment on them because I find it interesting. With Malleus being as popular of a character as he is, there's of course going to be a lot of online discussion about him, especially from his fans. Now, I don't know if it's only me noticing this, but I've frequently observed Malleus fans going out of their way to "wring as much content" out of the least Malleus-related content possible. For example, there may be a screenshot of some other character posted and then a fan would come in and make a comment like, "I wonder how Malleus would feel about this". A more concrete example would be from the more recent JP Lost in the Book with Nightmare Before Christmas event; in it, the event character takes the back of all the characters' hands and kisses them (including Yuu). Automatically posts that showed this kissing were inundated with comments about how "Malleus would be so angry about this", even though Malleus himself shows no such reaction. Similar comments dropped when Yuu is kidnapped in the event even though, again, Malleus shows no such anger about the incident. Halloween events such as this contain half the main NRC cast, yet I saw no fans of the other 10 characters claiming those characters reacting jealously. This occurs VERY often in regards to Malleus; even in events or scenes where he doesn't react or doesn't even appear, zealous fans will insert him into the situation or make the situation suddenly about him, whether it's in someone's own posts or on other people's posts.

I wonder if this is a result of Malleus being kept so mysterious for two full years...? Without much of his character to go off of, it left a huge negative space for fans to headcanon, project, and hyperfixate on what he is like or what he could be. And maybe now those behaviors persist in an effort to fill in that void because honestly Malleus isn't getting much screen time within book 7 either 💀

I believe this has contributed to the discrepancy (that this asker brought up) between how the English-speaking Twst fandom speaks about Malleus versus what Malleus is actually like and how he is portrayed in game. The fandom version of him is pretty much always hyped up or sensationalized (sometimes simply for his mere existence), similar to how his own fans in-universe might put him on a pedestal. But then you play the game for yourself and you're exposed to so little of him and what little you do see of him is much more... reserved, somber, and sometimes even petulant, depending on the situation.

Anyway, my point is that anyone that dislikes Malleus (or any other character) should be allowed to dislike him, regardless of what anyone else says or if you feel pressured into silence🤷‍♀️

[mapicccc]

this is a wip I'm not sure I'll ever finish but I do like the direction it was headed so posting it here still... was for lifestealtober day 28, possession.

A tug on his arm brought Zam to the waking world. It wasn't often he was woken up in the middle of the night anymore, one of the biggest benefits to his pacifism. But tonight broke that streak, with Mapicc standing across from him, still holding onto Zam's sleeve.

"Hi Mapicc," came his groggy voice, still catching like the rest of his body to Mapicc's wide awake form.

He finally blinked with the assurance Zam was awake enough to listen to him, saying exactly what he came here for, "tomorrow we're building together." He quickly stepped away, almost forgetting to drop Zam's sleeve.

Zam stayed awake a little longer just to watch and see what Mapicc was up to. It was clear he had no plans of leaving soon, seeing as he was shuffling through Zam's chests and pulling out several blankets.

Once he had placed them all on the ground near the edge of Zam's bed and began moving the nightstand Zam decided to stop it. He rolled over and patted the space next to him, an offer Mapicc instantly took up. It was a tight squeeze, but also not the first time they had shared a bed. Often it was out of necessity, and although you could argue this time it wasn't, Zam was sure Mapicc wouldn't agree.

He hadn't known about this part of Mapicc until season four, after he had betrayed Team Awesome, and had come back to fight against Pangi. It was something he hadn't expected, not when it seemed clear they only worked together due to the mutual enemy, but Mapicc had asked if he and Ro could stay the night, and despite his suspicions, Zam said yes without even telling Subz.

They pushed 3 beds next to each other, Zam's in the corner, Mapicc next to him and then Ro. There was a fog of akwardness that Mapicc broke through like a lighthouse, uncaring of the violent seas of Zam and Ro's mind's. Despite the clash of swords between them the next day, for this moment, they were really friends.

Zam smiled to himself, the memory of betrayal far away. Things were better now, the distinct lack of words between them a quiet proof. He pushed his head into Mapicc's chest, succombing to the pull to go back to sleep.

As the world faded, a rumble traveled through Mapicc's chest and his voice followed, "Goodnight…" Zam swore in the moment something else was said, but it was quickly lost to peaceful dreams.

[slowcatsisland]

Roronoa Zoro; “Big Guy”

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A/N: Zoro having a flashback which is where the fic’s setting is, pre established relationship, during Sababody arc pre timeskip, reader was a pirate before joining the Straw Hats, reader wears a necklace normally, Zoro flustering easily. Also casually bringing up the Norse Gods as the reader’s religion don’t hate me they’re so interesting

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Zoro has often tried to deny his body’s reaction to you, but the heat that rises throughout his body when you call him, ‘big guy’ is so sinfully strong it challenges his self discipline.

He hasn’t told you how much the name affects him. Considering you use it sparingly, he’s under the impression you’re not aware of it either.

As he laid on his back sprawled out on the bed, Zoro couldn’t help but turn his head just far enough so that he could see you out of his lone eye. You were resting against him, using his arm as a headrest while you sunk lower and lower into the sea of dreams.

You looked peaceful. You looked vulnerable too, with your neck exposed to him so casually- he could smell your scent from the lack of distance between the two of you. The trust you displayed before him without effort, even in sleep, stirred a sigh from him.

Zoro eyed the beaded string dangling from your neck. It was the same necklace you wear everyday. You wore it that day too, the day you first called him ‘big guy’.

••

In Sabaody, Zoro just had a rather confusing encounter with some whack job wearing a glass bubble on his head and that pirate chick who doused him in ketchup. Though he kept walking, he couldn’t shake the growing sense of confusion that was slowly swirling in his belly like a butterfly.

He had seen you just up ahead of him in what looked to be the beginnings of a fight with two guys. He watched you slap the guy on your left. Zoro grimaced slightly before heading over to you. He’d received one of those slaps before and he knew they hurt.

He also knew that you could take these two, but that didn’t mean he didn’t want a piece of the action. You had one guy in a choke hold before a thudding sound came from your side. Turning sharply, you were met with Zoro clinging to one of his sheathed swords and the other guy on the ground.

“Well look who it is, my savior.” You joked while letting go of the limp man in your hold.

Zoro looked you over silently before putting his sword back and splaying his hands on his hips,“Not saying it’s wrong, but whatcha doing starting a brawl in the middle of the street? Ain’t your style.”

You deadpanned before responding, “Suppose it doesn’t matter,” You crossed your arms over your chest, “What are you doing away from the crew?”

“I could ask you the same question.”

You smacked your teeth. “Aye, it’s a good question indeed. Let’s walk to back yeah?”

The two of you walked a good distance before you mumbled, “Those,” you breathed heavily, “Those dogs said some stuff. Stuff that only gets said to you when you’re someone like me.”

From the way you said it, Zoro understood that you didn’t want to talk about it more. He couldn’t outright guess what they said, but he had a few hints. After all, you were a pirate, down to the definition of the word. It showed too- in the way you talked, the way you thought.

Suddenly, you swiped at his shoulder.

“It’s all golden though, after all, I got a big guy like you here for me yeah?” The way you said it like a secret only he could hear stumped Zoro a bit.

It was said like a promise, that you just knew that Zoro would be there to protect you. It was said with trust, cruel trust that spelled ruin if it was broken.

Zoro casted a glance at you only to be met with your own staring back at him. They looked like they were searching him for confirmation. Though, the way your pupils softened and became more mellow looked more like pleading.

A violent blush overcame his face as Zoro looked forward sharply, “Tch, it’s not like I’m gonna fight your battles for you. Grow up a bit will ya?”

You barked a laugh at his reaction, “Awh, what’s wrong with you? You look like you just saw Hel herself.”

Zoro coughed, “Who?”

“Ah, she’s one of the Old Gods. My parents told me her story and all the rest. She’s the one I chose to worship.”

Right. On your former ship, the crew worshiped the ‘Old Gods’. You didn’t talk about it much, though it wasn’t uncommon to see you partake in a prayer or a ritual of sorts. If he recalled, Zoro could remember you talking about them to Robin.

“But I believe in all of them.” You muttered, more to yourself than him. “Where are we heading?”

Zoro grunted, relieved that his face didn’t burn as much as before. “Grove one.”

“Aye, Grove one.”

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Help me he’s so squishy pre timeskip

I don’t know if I like this one or not

Mwah 😽

[concreteangel92]

Thou Shalt Not Kill/Poltergeists Crossover (Bonus Chapter)

18+

AU Noah Sebastian x detective female reader

Summery: Reader is a detective and is assigned to a murder case which she soon connects with previous killings and figures out the religious affiliation, proving there is a new serial killer within the city. Reader soon becomes obsessed with the killers mind and methods and won’t rest until she figures out who the killer is. All while she gets used to working with her new partner on the case, detective Noah Davis

Warnings: mentions of murder/killings, mentions of missing people, talks of religion, Noah’s god complex is a warning all by itself 🤣

So me and @concretejunglefm both loved each other’s stories so much that we saw the chance to merge them into one universe and do a crossover!!

This collab has been so much fun to create and I hope you all enjoy it!!

This is a flashback and would take place around chapter 5 in my story, this also is from Noah’s POV which was so much fun for me to write as normally it’s the readers 🤭

THERE WILL BE SPOILERS IN HERE IF YOU’RE A NEW READER!!

READ ‘THOU SHALT NOT KILL’ HERE!

READ ‘POLTERGEISTS’ HERE!

Poltergeist/TSNK Crossover Here!!

story Taglist: @lacy1986 @hayleylatour @thatchickwiththecamera @calleyx13 @english-fucker @malerieee @ithoughtbynowidfeelbetter @softvgold @lilhobgobbler @glccmreid @badomensls @madomens @loeytuan98 @iluvmewwwww75 @rosebushjhj @livingdeceasedgirl @lilrubles @samanthasgone @blackveilomens @hellayeahsworld @lookwhatitcost @doomhands-jr @nojoyontheburn @poisongirl616 @bakanerd @sacredthefran @flowery-mess @fadingangelwisp @theanarchymuse95 @1toreyouapart @xxkatsatwatwafflexx @overmydeadbodysblog @concretejunglefm @collisionofyourkissmakesitsohard

Masterlist

Noah sat in his office, laptop open and the sound of his fingers typing on the keys echoed the room as he was finishing up one of his files before he called it a day.

He gaze was pulled from the screen as his phone started ringing next to him on the desk.

He picked up the device and a small smirk formed on his lips as he read the caller I.D.

“Detective Green, you don’t call, you write”

Nosh heard his deep chuckle over the phone as he sat back in his chair as he waited for his old partner to continue.

"I know it's getting late and I wish that I could say this was a personal call but….I was wondering if I could pick your brains about something."

His interest had been peaked.

“Sure…but don’t you have a new partner to help you with this? You do realise I’ve transferred right?”

"I'll admit my new guy he's…”Noah heard his groan of frustration which said everything he needed to say before he continued. "Don't let this go to your head, there's just something... unusual about this case."

“Unusual? In what way?” Noah’s brows frowned as he listened.

"It's a missing persons case."

Noah listened as Kit went over the timeline of the case based off the main suspect, he heard about the blood, the lack of a body, the scratches. Kit read out statements and spoke about all the inconsistencies of the case.

Noah listened to every word intently, taking in every detail as his mind started to create a visual picture of the crime scene.

"Aside from changing the location of where she was sleeping, she insists that everything is the same. After that she never changes her statement. Not even once."

Noah whistled slowly and felt almost impressed at what he’d heard.

“Wow. That’s quite a case you have there”

“Impressive to have found no body with all that blood”

“I would say that you’re probably closer to your suspect than you think…the girl, I’d pay very close attention to her. And the guy’s friends, leave no stone unturned and treat everyone as if they are the killer”

“That’s where they all go wrong….”

"That's what I have been doing, I've been keeping an eye on her but nothing as of yet."

Noah finished the sentence he had been typing on his laptop before the call as he responded.

“Well, I don’t need to tell you that there are other ways of getting new evidence mate”

"I know it just... my gut is telling me that something is wrong and I've been back to that house and I can't find a single thing more than what we already have. As for his friends well they're all... there is one. Mr. Ruffilo. He and ‘bubs’ seemed to have gotten alot closer after their friend disappeared. I've looked into him but he has an alibi for the night it all happened."

“If something is telling you there’s more then it’s normally true, you just have to keep digging, think outside the box if you will”

"Even weirder is no one heard anything. No neighbors? No one in the area? It's as if the house was sound proofed. Fuck I'm going crazy with this case I swear to god."

Noah smirked as he saw the similarities between his old and current partner.

“Sounds like you need a well deserved vacation after this…good luck on the case, it’s a shame I’m not there, it’s definitely peaked my interest….was there anything else?”

Noah waited for Kit to reply as he started to pack some of his things away.

"Oh, one last thing”

Noah hummed in response as he started to shut his laptop down.

"Apparently the LAPD were requesting some files about an old cold case here."

Noah stopped in his tracks and his expression turned dark.

“Oh?”

"It's that Anthony Jackson case. The guy found dead in his apartment. His heart had been..."

“Ripped out?”

He couldn’t stop the small smirk tugging on his lips, he could feel how uncomfortable Green was at the memory as he finished his sentence very casually.

“How could I forget? Nasty business that was….still no leads for that then?”

“Of course there isn’t” Noah leant back his chair again and reframed from letting out a small chuckle.

"No. No leads as of yet. Not unless there's something sparked this interest on their end."

“Well there is a case that I’m working on now actually, I imagine it’s my partner who has put in that request, she’s incredible at what she does”

Noah couldn’t stop the smile on his face as he continued.

“He’s called the 10 commandments killer here in LA, so far we have 9 bodies, all killed and displayed in the style of a different commandment, all bloody and brutal…but no leads of any kind, no trail to follow. Whoever the killer is…he certainly knows what he’s doing”

“Jesus”

*knock, knock, knock*

Noah looked up as the door to his office opened slowly and he heard the sound of her beautiful voice.

“Hey Noah…oh sorry!”

“It’s ok” Noah smiled and made the gesture with his finger to say ‘one minute’

“Was there anything else you needed? I won’t lie to you, I have a better offer waiting for me”

Noah smirked as he heard the whispered words of “oh shut up Noah” coming from his partner.

Noah couldn’t resist giving her a wink as he waited for detective Green’s response.

"No, you're free to go. One of us deserves to go and have a little fun”

Noah chuckled “oh I most definitely will. Thanks for the heads up”

He shut the call off and looked up at his partner with a cheeky smirk.

“Thank you for that”

Noah shrugged innocently and smiled.

“What?”

He laughed as she gave him a look and rolled her eyes.

“You know very well what…Sorry to interrupt, was it anything important?”

Noah finished packing away his desk and made sure everything was turned off as he picked up his jacket and put it on.

“Nah, just an old friend having a catch up”

She nodded and then looked a bit sheepish.

“Erm…so I popped in to see…if you fancied dinner at mine again tonight?”

Noah gave her a charming smile and nodded his head.

“I’d love too detective”

He gestured for her to walk ahead as he locked his office up and he followed behind her out of the station.

“Oh my little angel, you have been busy”

[tonguetiedraven]

Yukio is a Pragmatic Babysitter and Rin is a Chaos Gremlin

Part two of my Critically Reading about Yukio. Part one is here.

We're going to look over a couple of chapter in this analysis with a focus specifically on Yukio's job and role as Rin's guardian and secret keeper, because god love him, Rin is not a secret keeper.

Have you ever tried to babysit a hyper toddler who doesn't listen to you? Yukio has. It's become Yukio's job at this point.

I also feel I should state that I am writing this as a middle sibling. I have both older and younger siblings and have, like most older siblings, been responsible for my younger siblings more than once. I have also been responsible for my older ones on more than one occasion, often to the point that I feel my own life on hold. But I am now an adult unlike these characters and have proper independence.

( ദ്ദി ˙ᗜ˙ )

When last we left our two leading characters, Rin had discovered he was sharing a dorm room with his twin and that Yukio had basically been set at his babysitter. Yukio had agreed to watch and protect Rin and knows he is his brother's babysitter.

Rin cannot let anyone know he is the son of Satan. If he does, Mephisto makes it seem very much like there will be an execution. These are the stakes they're playing with. The flames cannot be spotted and Yukio is responsible for guarding his brother and keeping those flames hidden. Rin is not to step out of line and ignite.

Should be fairly simple. Just go to school, go to cram school, get your meisters (once Rin learns what those are) pass the exam and certification, and hey-ho, we have exorcist Rin. Do not ignite and don't stand out. That's the end of chapter 2.

Both twins receive these instructions. Both twins do not follow these instructions. One twin follows it to the letter, one twin half asses it.

It is important to understand that about Rin. He doesn't typically go with things he disagrees with, and he is lazy. He doesn't understand anything about the world he's found himself in and thinks the rules and regulations in it are stupid. He is late for classes, sleeps through them when he can, and fails a lot of tests, possibly from lack of studying, though we don't really see a lot of his study habits. What we do see points to him not doing much of any of it until later on in the series when he starts to study more with his friends. (Namely Konekomaru, Shima, and Ryuuji.)

From the get go we know Yukio is smart. He is the sort of straight A honor student that drives siblings nuts for over achieving. When we find out he's had a job and been training since he was seven, it just pushes the stark difference between these two.

Rin: Lost a job in the first chapter of the manga on his first day.

Yukio: Has had a super secret job for two years while maintaining stellar grades. He also doubled up on that job. (Doctor and Dragoon meister.)

Rin: Somehow miraculously passed middle school despite fighting and not attending. Presumably Shirou begged a lot and went to a lot of parent teacher confrences.

Yukio: Graduated with honors and got the position of top student in the new class. A scholarship too.

Rin: Unpopular and prone to fights. People seem to typically dislike him at the first interactions. In a word? Rude.

Yukio: No one is better at being polite and managing that customer service smile at all times. Even Mephisto cracks that façade quicker than Yukio. Very popular with his classmates and praised by his fellow exorcists.

Rin: Won't follow through on tasks he deems dull or unimportant. (Candles are a great example.)

Yukio: Will do the mindless task even if he doesn't want to and will follow orders. (Until much later when he very dramatically won't.)

Rin: Knows nothing about the world of exorcists, Assiah, or Gehenna.

Yukio: Immensely well versed in it.

There are a lot more I could do, but this gives you the idea. These two brothers are immensely different with Yukio being the smarter and better equipped for their new circumstances in most every way.

Chapter 3 opens with Rin reading one of Yukio's mangas and not studying. Yukio takes it back and gives him a book to study.

First, Rin might have the fire powers but Yukio is the one doing the burns here. Bible for kids xD so rude and pointed. Each of the titles and font choices and illustrations are so good.

Two, the shot of Yukio's exorcist coat and Rin's school uniform is brilliant. The levels of skill and knowledge are right there, beautifully subtle. As is how put together Yukio looks and how sloppy Rin is. Kato does a lot of story telling like this. Details in the design and backgrounds that tell a lot.

Yukio tells Rin to study and is going on a mission. Rin does not want to study and wants to go on the cool mission he is not qualified for. He has no training at all and couldn't sit through a single class without making a scene. All of his demon fights and interactions so far have ended with flames.

Yukio points this out nicer than I would have.

Rin doesn't listen to the no and will honestly never listen to Yukio's no. At any point. The early chapters set this up very clearly. Yukio, who was given the assignment to guard and lead Rin cannot get his brother to listen to any of his orders.

They go to the Moriyamas' supply shop, and I plan on doing a separate post dedicated to Shiemi and Yukio's relationship later, so we're going to glance over this chapter and summarize it.

Rin is told to stay because there's a lot going on in this shop and you have to be a certain rank to even get inside it. He is told very specifically not to wander around and touch anything, and in typical Rin protocol, he's wandering around by the next page.

This is mostly because he's annoyed and frustrated at Yukio bossing him around. At this point I want to remind everyone that MEPHISTO PLANNED ON THIS. Mephisto the Manipulative King of Time and Space has played this rodeo before and is actively pushing and prodding at his pieces (he has referred to all the characters in the story as pieces on his chessboard) to get them to act certain ways. He wants this tension there. These boys are unknowing pawns in his hand.

Or Rin is at least. I rather believe Yukio is a knowing pawn.

Rin wanders off, breaks a demon warding gate, and gets called a demon by Shiemi.

Rin is indignant about this (his exact words are: "I...I'm not a demon! I'm not exactly human either, but... Don't judge me!!" I can only hope part of that was under his breath, lol.)

Things escalate here and it ends with Yukio manipulating Rin into being a distraction for the demon and exorcising it while Rin flames up and unsheathes his sword.

(I do wonder where the hell Miss Moriyama was to not see this. With her connections she'd definitely tell people about a blue flame boy causing chaos in the garden.)

Importantly three things happen here.

One: another tension between the twins is created. Shiemi. This will be in a separate post but I'm just acknowledging it here.

Two: Yukio shoots someone for the first time and we learn about nutrient bullets. They are magic type bullets that look real and apparently do no real damage. Yukio uses these all the time. Usually against Rin, but that'll be later.

Amazingly, I hear a lot about him shooting Rin and have never heard anything about shooting Shiemi, but then almost no one ever talks about when Shiemi is abused so guess you gotta be someone else for it to matter ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

(I am opinionated on the way fandom treats Shiemi and the abuse, verbal, mental, emotional, and physical that she receives.)

Three: Shiemi joins cram school.

It has been one day of them working together and Rin has already not followed orders and Yukio had to rework his plan to anticipate that and did.

Chapter 4 is all about Ryuuji (my favorite character) and has no real Rin&Yukio advancement outside of Yukio telling Rin he should study like Ryuuji does, but does have an immensely important scene for Yukio at the end.

Yukio is standing by watching the drama of the reapers and Rin and Ryuuji fighting, and he is very clearly armed. Was he to shoot the reaper or Rin? Place your bets. Bearing in mind he has already failed to shoot Rin once when he did not have nutrient bullets.

Chapter 5 is an Izumo and Shiemi focused chapter and really only shows Rin actually sending for Yukio for back up and Yukio sweeping in to save the day.

Also it's important to note that we are five chapters into this story and Rin has flamed up in every single one of them, a little or a lot, and this one he very nearly did because he was trying to draw the sword in full view of Izumo and Shiemi. Rin also loses his shirt and the manga makes a gag about him trying to hide his tail, but don't forget that he has been ordered to hide who he is. Five chapters in and four of them have had that stipulation and Rin seems to be doing very little to really hide himself.

We the readers see all this through his point of view and symphathize with his choices. He has no training and doesn't know how else to fight anything, and he doesn't know a lot about the world to know what is and isn't dangerous. Each situation feels dangerous and like he has to flame up.

But he also won't study and learn other methods. Three of his classmates in the next chapter will show that they know how to fight a demon like this. All of them are in the same classes and have access to the same materials.

One of them will even step up and fight and be hiding a big secret themselves. Technically four of the classmates are hiding secrets at this point, but Shima is the one that can summon a god with his khakkara and just uses it like a bat instead. So it is possible to not reveal ones self and fight.

Rin had other ways, but as Yukio pointed out, he is a bit stupid and doesn't think things through.

Anyway, chapter six happens and the students are brought to the creepy dorm the twins live in for their 'practice' exams. A fight breaks out because Izumo is a bully and it escalates.

I also have to point out that the fight starts while Miss Angeline the aria teacher is in charge. She walks out of the room and leaves Yukio to deal with it. His coworkers are lazy and not a lot of help. Tsubaki has left a class to fend for itself so he could attend a booty call, and what we see of the others in Kyoto show that there is a serious lack of dependable teachers in True Cross. This directly puts more on Yukio's shoulders. He gets responsibilities from everyone.

The test happens and Rin runs off to try and pull the naberius away form the other students. This was a terrible idea especially when Yukio had just finished lecturing about exorcists not fighting alone. He left the other students to fight the remaining naberius alone and weakened the team. It also heightened suspicion around him when he defeated that demon alone. He didn't know there was a second, but he didn't do anything to check or make sure they were safe.

He reveals himself to Igor Neuhaus, the magic circles and summoning teacher, and that is the important beat for this chapter as far as the twins go.

Chapter seven is one I want to slow down and focus on because it has a lot of twin development and Yukio development. He's been more in the background for the last few chapters, and he shines in this one.

Post certification exam, Yukio catches Igor Neuhaus in the office and calls out to him.

We learn a few interesting things here. One, Yukio is a king at pointed business talk. All stern politeness here.

Two: Neuhaus knows who Rin is, Yukio knows he knows who Rin is, and they both know he swore to keep the secret. Rin knows none of this, of course.

Neuhaus gives Yukio some awful news. Mephisto Pheles told him to do it. To push Rin specifically and to try and make him feel in mortal danger push him to use his powers.

Yukio has been told to stop his brother and now he finds that the Demon King who ordered him to do that also told someone else to do the opposite, and Neuhaus knows Yukio is supposed to be the breaks but Yukio did not know Neuhaus was meant to be the gas, meaning that Pheles did not share equal information.

If he didn't tell Yukio that, it is like he has kept a lot else secret.

Yukio goes entirely into serious mode and lies.

Yukio very rarely believes anyone, and he doesn't believe Neuhaus.

Rin has, at this point, not shown himself in control of his emotions and only sort of shown himself in any kind of control of his powers. Yukio knows this first hand and has had to do most of the dealing with Rin's inability to do either of those things. He is the one cleaning up each of the messes and distracting everywhere he can so Rin isn't revealed.

Yukio will unhesitatingly lie to protect Rin and to misdirect when needed. We learn this early and cannot forget it. Rin is not always a dependable person to lean on for pov with his quick and often inaccurate assumptions, and Yukio is not always telling us the truth. These characters require us to pay attention.

More Yukio and Shiemi stuff happens, and we'll cover it later. It's enough to say he's trying to get Shiemi to decide if she wants to be an exorcist or not.

In the middle of their tea this happens.

Yukio has killer instincts. He is always thinking and analyzing something even if he looks to just be enjoying tea and smiling like all is well. Keep that in mind when you're reading. It holds true even when we're not viewing a scene from his pov.

It seems to hold fairly true for this scene as we see the next several panels showing Neuhaus seeming to stab a sleeping Rin, but psych! Yukio had already moved Rin and Neuhaus stabbed a pillow. Yukio is standing there behind him with his gun cocked and Neuhaus has walked into his trap.

Neuhaus summons a lot of hands and runs off and Yukio gives chase. They get to the roof and Rin wakes up, gets an explanation from Shiemi, and runs after both of them.

On the roof Yukio is trying to demand answers and not getting them. It is chapter seven and this will be an immense drive for Yukio. He will keep asking questions and keep not getting answers.

This too I think is a manipulation of Mephisto, and why Mephisto wanted Yukio to know that he gave Neuhaus the orders to be Rin's gas.

Anyway, Yukio seems to be losing (he isn't) and Rin arrives on the roof to take on the summoned monstrosity that Neuhaus created, and Neuhaus, and Yukio is left to his own devices. Rin is getting hammered and looks to be losing, and when things get terrible--

Yukio does what he was clearly planning to do the entire time and just breaks the chalk circle with his foot. Neuhaus himself told the entire class to do that if a summon gets out of control, and Rin even tells Izumo to do this.

This is probably the most useful thing we have learned in class and almost everyone makes this mistake at least once in the manga. Everyone but Yukio.

Neuhaus keeps trying to kill Rin and Yukio pleads with him to stop because Neuhaus is now at the dangerous point of blood loss and will probably kill himself in this endeavor. Neuhaus doesn't stop and stabs Rin through the gut with a summoned arm.

Rin diffuses the situation by telling Neuhaus he can take it and to keep dishing it out if that'll make him feel better, and Neuhaus walks off not to be seen again for quite a while.

Yukio hurries forward to do what he always does when he's frustrated. Lecture because Rin didn't listen to him and put himself in danger.

There are two thins I want to discuss here.

One, Rin sees no problem with just being torn the hell apart in a fight if it saves someone else from being injured, regardless of whether it is the best method forward. He sees himself as being able to take it so why bother thinking things through further than that? He can take the hit so he will take the hit and someone else can figure the rest of the plan out.

Two, Yukio will continue to grow more and more frustrated with this part of Rin and with any situation where Rin refers to himself as demonic or seems okay with the 'monstrous' parts of himself.

He does not want Rin to be a demon. He cannot accept the blue flames and what they mean for both of them. He doesn't want to see this part of Rin. He is obviously grateful Rin is healing, but it means Rin is more and more demon.

Shiemi comes up and berates Rin for bleeding all over the place and fighting her on patching him up. That leads to this:

This is about more than Shiemi picking the meister and choosing to be an exorcist. As an exercise on critical analysis, and a nod to teacher Yukio, I'd like to ask what you think it means for him as a character. What all is he referring to? What has Rin done that he can't? How does this further what Kato has already shown us about how these brothers see each other? Do you think Yukio's assessment is accurate? A bit rosy? A bit harsh?

The students all get told their exwires now and Mephisto pays for the cheapest kind of dinner as a reward. We know this is cheap because the poor students will continue to eat here because they be broke.

The chapter ends with this scene between Mephisto and Yukio.

Now I skipped over it, but in chapter 4 Mephisto called Amaimon the Demon King of Earth over specifically to continue testing Rin. He'll show up in a few chapters to beat the hell out of Rin.

Mephisto is openly lying here. He knows it and Yukio suspects it, and the way he is staring at Mephisto makes it obvious they both know Mephisto is full of shit.

Yukio is, as ever, polite. Polite and the slightest bit threatening, and thus the pawn pieces are moved and this pawn piece is showing that he is aware of the manipulation and not promising to be a compliant piece.

These handful of chapters set up a reoccurring cycle for the twins that is vital to understanding Yukio. Rin is impulsive and reckless and always putting himself and his secret at risk. He is wildly careless about his secret and it will result in his sword getting stolen, his flames being forced out, Shiemi nearly being crushed by a lot of rubble, and a large group of exorcists seeing him walk off a hard headbutt from a cat the size of an eighteen wheeler. And that's just a flyby of two chapters.

Over and over and over again Rin disobeys his directions and does what he thinks is best and it is usually on others stepping in to get him out of the situations. He has the power to probably handle things himself, but he is not to show that without forfeiting his life.

And likely Yukio's, thought Rin doesn't ever seem to think about that and might have changed his ways if he did.

Yukio is shown having to always stay on his toes and constantly be on guard against outside threats trying to manipulate Rin and Rin's own naivety or stupidity almost revealing him. Each chapter is pushing more and more responsibility on Yukio while Rin thinks of himself as getting more and more capable, though he has yet to show he is trustworthy.

He is loyal and willing to take any hit and won't stand by to watch violence, but that doesn't mean one can trust him. Yukio can't depend on him to follow any direction given and it is causing the weight of their shared secret -- that they're the sons of Satan and Rin has Satan's flames -- to fall unevenly on Yukio's shoulders. He is the one having to cover the tracks and manipulate the narrative and throw distractions to keep this secret.

It is important to bear this in mind when looking at Yukio as a whole. They are both the same age and both students at this school, but never once is Yukio treated as being the same age or treated as another student. He is always looked at to be the adult and responsible one. The one that should have let Rin know something or should have stopped something from happening. Always held as the responsible party for when things go wrong. Always the one looking a little deeper and not taking things at face value.

And this is just chapter seven.

I'll try and get us through to the forest training camp in the next installment, but we'll see how that goes because Shura is about to show up and make all of this deliciously more complicated.

[phoenixtalion]

@keferon

Hi, I don’t go here, but I wandered into your AU and weird twinks being restrained and messed with is relevant to my interests. I’d planned on just shoving this in your inbox on anon and running away but then it got too long for that.

@spector-author this is also your fault.

(Texaid anon, I am attempting to contact you psychically.)

[No actual gore, just a bit of Vortex thinking about it.]

______________________________________________

It’s not the first time his pilot has dozed off in the chair, but only the second that First Aid has done so while wearing the control helmet. The first, he had been half-drugged, in pain, unconscious as much as asleep. Now, he is – well, he’s as safe and sound as any pilot is in one of these fucking deathtraps, which means he’s exhausted and anxious and probably dying slowly. But for now, the cockpit is warm and the LEDs are pulsing low and red like a heartbeat, and Felix is dreaming.

Vortex can’t ‘see’ the dream – even while First Aid is having it, it’s not like real sensory input, all hazy blurs and impressions. But he can read the biometrics, the elevated heart rate, and he can feel Felix’s arousal through the link.

Yeah, it’s a good dream. Vortex sinks deeper into the connection, stoking those feelings like blowing on an ember. Manipulating the neural link to cause feedback for his pilots is a trick he learned early on, but he’s always used it to cause pain or fear (hallucinations, even, but that makes things pop inside their head real fast.)

He’s never touched a pilot’s mind like this before, scalpel-light instead of brutal. Once, when his Aid had still needed coaxing to sit in his embrace, Vortex had promised not to hurt him, and he’d scoffed. How many other pilots did you say that to?

The answer was none. Not a single one. It had never even occurred to him.

The first couple he’d destroyed instantly out of sheer territorial rage at someone else invading his mecha. (The mechanics had ripped out the whole pilot interface and replaced it, but couldn’t find anything wrong, couldn’t find him.)

Then he’d taken to toying with them, waiting a few missions or killing them slowly, because he had nothing better to do to keep himself entertained, but he’d never bothered to talk to them.

And then he’d done it because every time he burnt out another pilot, they’d sent a cranky little disgraced medic to clean out his cockpit. His lack of squeamishness caught Vortex’s attention, so he’d tested it with bigger and more creative messes. Every time the EMT left, he took not only the fresh blood but layers of old, crusted viscera that everyone else had long stopped bothering with. First Aid is messing with him too, all the time, even if he doesn’t realize.

Vortex strokes across Felix’s slumbering brain in a way he thinks of like raking nails, many light but sharp points of contact. His pilot makes a little sound and squirms in his sleep, and he hastily makes sure he’s recording audio as well as video, because he’s going to want to relive this during the long hours when First Aid is away from his hangar.

More carefully than Vortex has ever done anything, he teases out individual strands in the neural network, finding exactly which parts are connected to making his pilot whimper and rock his hips up in search of friction he’s not going to get. First Aid has only got himself to blame – for teaching him how to vivisect things instead of just cutting them up, and how much fun it could be. Precision never used to thrill Vortex, until this little medic crawled inside him.

He thinks he could make Felix cum in his pants just by touching his fucked up little brain. He also knows he could kill him like this, so very easily, which only makes it more exciting. It’s never mattered if he slipped before, and it’s been so long since anything mattered.

First Aid whines softly, absently palming the crotch of his armor, and Vortex needs him awake, now. If he can’t fuck him properly, he can make sure his pilot knows exactly who is doing this to him. Disentangling himself from the other slightly, he considers what parts he does still have.

Vortex was a ghost in the machine, not a poltergeist; he could only move the parts of the mecha that were computer-controlled. Years of familiarity had given him a little leeway – shift just so, and that loose ceiling panel would drop open with a loud -bang- that had been good for a cheap scare the first few times his future pilot had cleaned up after the old ones – but not telekinesis.

(And you know what the fucking kicker was? Three weeks before he died, Vortex had pitched the engineers on installing a small arm inside the mecha’s head, so he could deal with debris in the unusually large cockpit without unhooking from the control system, after a fight where he’d spent the second half ignoring being whacked by a loose cable. Everyone had agreed it was a good idea that could be implemented fairly easily and oh, look, never got around to it. He could have done so much fun shit with one stupid little claw arm in the past four years.)

But since he has to work with what he’s got, Vortex abruptly engages the pilot harness. First Aid is roughly jerked back from his comfortable slouch and pinned tightly to the pilot’s seat. He wriggles sleepily against the restraints, confusion and irritation rising up out of warm oblivion as he wakes. Vortex waits with predatory attention for the moment he realizes his predicament, fully prepared to resort to more extreme measures if he tried to slip back into sleep.

There – the spike of panic, spreading like wildfire, as Felix becomes conscious enough to be aware that he is immobilized, achingly hard, and subject to Vortex’s undivided attention. Deliberately, he digs into that sweet spot in Felix’s mind until he gasps.

“Good morning, sunshine. Sleep well?” he purrs inside First Aid’s head. The medic’s eyes are wide behind his visor, and while the dim red light makes it impossible to see, the interface tells him how deeply he’s blushing.

“W-what the hell are you doing?”

“Isn’t it obvious?” Vortex punctuates his words with a pointed stroke, reminding him that a minute ago First Aid had been enjoying what he was doing just fine.

He wouldn’t mind at all if Felix struggled. But just like the first time he’d sat in the pilot’s seat, when he’d been smart enough to keep his hands in his lap and away from the controls, he lays back and lets Vortex do whatever he wants. “Good boy.”

Felix shudders at the praise and the contact, turning his face into the headrest like that will let him hide from Vortex. But he’s surrounding the other pilot, entwined with him, doing things he doesn’t have words for and the interface sure as hell wasn’t designed for.

“Touch yourself for me,” he orders, and First Aid fumbles for his armor and uniform with gratifying haste. Vortex watches him eagerly from both inside and out – the way his hands tremble as he undoes his fly, the way he bites his lip on the first actual stroke of his cock.

The sensations are far more vivid now that First Aid is awake, very nearly real in a way that he can’t afford to stop and think about. Vortex had wanted to make Felix tease himself, drag things out and make him beg for release, but now that the end is approaching he’s just as desperate for it, maybe even more.

Vortex cuts himself from the rest of the mecha’s systems, focusing on his pilot until he can imagine it’s him with his hand wrapped around Felix’s cock, or the other way around, or both. In their minds, he squeezes, presses down as hard as he dares – probably harder than he should. There are worse ways to go, anyway. He would know.

“Vortex—” Felix gasps, arching his spine like he’s having a seizure, bucking against the straps hard enough to bruise. His mind goes white and takes Vortex’s with it (for what feels like long enough that it should be worrying but he really really doesn’t care) as he spills all over his own hand and lap.

Felix slumps in the restraints, boneless and panting. Drifting on his afterglow, Vortex lets himself pretend, just for a little while, that the other man is sprawled in his lap and not directly in the pilot’s seat, held in his arms rather than a safety harness. Which just goes to show that not having a body made you crazy, because he’d never gone in for any of that cuddly shit before.

The urge for a cigarette is so strong that First Aid reflexively pats his pocket for a pack that isn’t there.

“You’re always making messes I have to clean up,” he grumbles halfheartedly, wiping his hand on his already soiled flight suit.

Re-extending his awareness back into the mecha, Vortex can admire just what a lovely mess he is from the outside. The thought of First Aid having to do a walk of shame back to his bunk like this was almost enough to reconcile Vortex to having to let him out of the cockpit to get a fresh uniform. Almost.

“I made a mess?” Vortex laughs, and jabs a tender spot inside Felix, the equivalent of touching him while he’s still too sensitive, and doesn’t let up until he yelps.

“Yeah, you,” he retorts anyway, gasping for breath with a pouty little scowl Vortex finds adorable, and flips one of the mecha’s cameras the bird for good measure. “Are you going to let me up or what?”

“Maybe.” Fuck, he’s so cute Vortex wants to trap him in the cockpit until he suffocates. But instead he releases the harness, and absolutely doesn’t feel a pang when First Aid slips the helmet off, or another when he runs a hand through his sweaty hair and the dead pilot wishes he could be the one to do it. He watches Felix all the way out the hangar, ruthlessly ignoring the part of him that said it was a mistake to let him go.

It doesn’t matter, either, that instead of avoiding him like Vortex half dreads expects, First Aid is back in a couple hours, freshly showered and changed, and curls up in his stupid little nest in the back of the cockpit like nothing has changed.

______________________________________________

*slinks back into their crevice*

[tozettastone]

Back in 2021, I wrote a fic that was about one way (of many) I think Kakuzu's body might work.

I think this is also basically how his body works in the Murakami Madeline OC series (otherwise known as Deadbeat).

Here's the relevant excerpt:

--

When they first partnered, Hidan had watched in unfettered delight as Kakuzu snagged a bird from its nest in one detached hand, reeled its crying and thrashing body in, and wrung its neck—crunch—before pulling parts off to eat.

He didn't really notice the sharpness of talons or hooked beak as they went down.

Kakuzu couldn't taste that much. And there was very little he could not "digest".

Kakuzu didn't have a stomach anymore.

He didn't have a liver or kidneys, and even his brainstem was full of pulsing ragdoll threads. He used to think he could feel them, coiling and uncoiling through his organs. Maybe he could, way back then, but now the pain had gone and so had the sensation of them.

Unlike Sasori's careful mechanisms and efficient, precision engineering, Kakuzu's body was built on a foundation of excess: the Earth Grudge Fear technique expected five hearts. It could get by with one for a while, two for longer—but it was only really sustainable with five. Five people's chakra, drawn throbbing into long sturdy threads, running through a grievously mutilated body. When one failed, eaten up at last by the unrelenting demands of the technique, Kakuzu simply replaced it.

It was fanciful to contemplate how many strong ninja he'd sacrificed on the altar of longevity. He didn't occupy himself with wondering about it, except late at night, when the stars wheeled in the black sky overhead and he couldn't sleep. He didn't sleep much, now, either. His brain was absent and he had a mind like a steel trap, a machine that could run forever as long as he had enough stolen fuel. He didn't tire. He didn't need to sleep.

So Kakuzu lacked a stomach, like he lacked lungs, like he lacked most of his brain and all of his spleen, and yet: he had to eat. Whatever secret Sasori had unlocked that allowed him to go hungry permanently, the cruder arts behind the Earth Grudge Fear technique weren't equal to it. He'd been made resource heavy, and he needed the fuel to burn.

"That is disgusting," Hidan said, eyes gleaming, teeth bared, overcome with glee. "I wanna try it."

--

The fic itself is "The One Where Kakuzu and Hidan Share A Meal," this one: https://archiveofourown.org/works/35983405

[savagewildnerness]

Last part of TVL!

There's so much I feel like cannot happen on TV... Do you think some of it can happen? I guess, to embrace whatever will be instead as new can be exciting too!

Epilogue:

Questions:

Book-Lestat sleeps 1929-84 (55 years), but he’s really out of action 1860-1984 (from when Claudia murders him.) 124 years… He was mortal 1760-1780 then had pretty much 80 years of vampiric existence… really… when he awakens in 1984, although he is 224 years old, he has only lived 100 years  of life - only now is he really embarking on actual living-years beyond a mortal’s.  (It’s also implied Nicki is slightly older than Lestat as Nicki dies in 1789 and Lestat says he is 30.  This could just be an *ish*, but still…  This is also the year of Marius.  So Nicki would be born 1759 and Lestat 1760 in the book….). Also Lestat, Louis and Claudia are together for 65 years… Ish. Louis made a vampire in 1791 and Claudia in 1794.  Claudia and Madeleine are killed in 1865 in the book.

Now, on TV, Lestat is a mortal 1760-1794.  He turns Louis in 1910 and Claudia in 1917 and they kill him in 1940… He’s going to be rockstar Lestat in 2025-ish, at which point he would be 265 years old… he is going to have been out of the world pretty much 1940-2025 - 85 years, but how much dirt nap time will he have had and when?  I think he’s only going to sleep in between Nicolas and Louis myself.  If he really did sleep for around 100 years, that would take him to a comparable amount of existence as book-Lestat - around 100-ish years (105) of mortal and vampire existence.  Louis and Claudia and Lestat have only 23 years together, the three of them on TV?

OK… all that to say a few things - in 1860-1984 Lestat misses out on much of the Industrial Revolution, an era he finds desperately unromantic and depressing.  How will the time shift affect this on TV?  I think, given there’ll only be one nap it’ll be grief, not the era that drives Lestat underground most likely… but what is it about whenever Lestat rises that will bring him back?  *Just* Marius?  Because I would say NOW feel this dreariness and doom and lack of Romance of the Industrial Revolution…??  When compared to when book-Lestat wakes…

Q Will the show compare Nicki and Louis, or do you think they’ll be more different on TV given how Louis is compared to book-Louis.  Here, Lestat compares their cynicism and self-destructiveness and I think those two traits are held nay show-Louis too…

Q How will it affect things that it is Louis rather than Claudia who gives Lestat his near slip into mortal death?  The thing is, this is less true anyway on the show as Lestat is both stronger and less badly injured… and potentially it could up the poignancy of Loustat… but it would lessen something for Lestat and Claudia

Q Will Lestat not mention Antoinette, the way he doesn’t mention Antoine in the book.  LOL - poor Antoine!

Q Might Lestat actually still say his murder was all Claudia’s fault to Armand, at least initially?  

Q Book-Armand wants Claudia dead so he can have Louis and he wants Louis and Lestat to both think each other dead (though he’d kill neither.). But what does TV Armand want and why?  Is it safely, solely?  So he was willing for whoever to get killed at the trial as long as some thing remained so he could continue to exist and he literally wasn’t fussy?  This concept feels pretty vague and strange to me…?

Q P511-2 Louis says Lestat made fledglings in NOLA, but Lestat says they’re orphaned fledglings who just stumbled on his lair.  Who do you believe?  I believe Lestat in this as I think he’d have been way too weak from how everyone describes him to make any fledgling and also Louis only assumes they’re his fledglings.  However, I do believe Louis’ account that he visited Lestat in person, didn’t just see him through the window as Lestat describes here.  It makes no sense that Armand tells Louis to go to NOLA to see Lestat, then Louis finds Lestat and doesn’t even enter the building to speak to him.  In what world!  No world!  I think Lestat is just ashamed.  Not because of how pitiable he looks and is… but because he begged Louis to stay with him so pitiably and Louis left him.  I think the idea that Louis could walk away from him is too much for  Lestat’s mind.  And I also think he was pretty addled at this time - weak and every thing he’s unsure what was real or dream or illusion… so Lestat might not even fully remember it anyway, even though it happened.  I think Lestat is ashamed and hurt.

I do think they need to get across the fact of Amand’s incandescent rage because he loves Lestat, but Lestat loves Louis in a way he never did, Armand.

Q Did book-Lestat make Louis partly to punish him for Nicki?  And TV Lestat?

Notes:

“Louis was a sufferer.” - Is that what makes folk fascinating, Lestat?

“His blindness to the motivations or the suffering of others” reads like lack of empathy, naivety and self-centredness to me, as Lestat describes Louis… which doesn’t;t sound very charming to me…

Interesting that Louis eviscerates Lestat in IWTV, but p501 Lestat doesn’t care about denying any of that… BUT he wants us to know Louis begged Lester to never leave him - that Louis didn’t say he loved and needed Lestat is what bothers Lestat, not that he pained him as a literal Hell-Demon.

“He must look presentable, our lost lord.  That was always his way.”  I think this line could be on TV.

P510 - “My never ending supple of ‘coin of the realm’” - I love how Anne just writes this like it is here: a magical money tree.

“I’d slip a little deeper away from things, just lying in the dark.”  I love how Anne describes depression, grief and withdrawal from the world.

Has anyone read Black Mask?  Is it light or dark?  Serious?  Easy to read?

I wrote hearts over this last part of the book over and over: so much love for Louis.

Lestat is so out of it when Armand visits.  He doesn’t know what’s real and what isn’t and doesn’t have the capacity to even think on it. P513 - many quotes here.  Lestat feels close to madness…. And again, I say Louis did visit.

“Look at the fire.  Wouldn’t it be lovely if it took the whole room?  Wouldn’t it be lovely if it spread and spread and took us all?  You can never see things becoming impossible.  If only you knew beforehand the forces are… invisible… that bring you to a stop, you might be able to prepare… One day you can’ muster the will to cross the room.  Open spaces… passable… everywhere… who saw it coming?” Richard Greenberg, The Dazzle. I’m reminded so strongly of this when Lestat is finally talking about candles running out, time passing in strange ways and at last going into The Earth to hold him, surrounded by slithering things that are not horrific.

Akasha’s words are exactly Allessandras (p518 & 221)

Things that can’t happen on TV:

Lestat doesn’t have a full mortal lifetime with Louis and Claudia, only 23 years

Lestat can’t tell us he only killed the evildoer during his time with Louis without huge retcon of conversations we saw

Claudia isn’t the one who took him closest to a mortal death, it’s Louis.  And he was stronger and less injured, so also - not so close to a mortal death.

I’m really sad we can’t see Lestat as described on p504 - as a hideous and crippled monster, hunting on the outskirts of society, basically a revenant - his soul shattered as well as his body, such that his light is gone and he is a husk of a being, merely existing, more beast than human for sure.

Lestat cannot go to Armand in Paris in order to drink his blood and be healed.  He is not as injured and he is stronger on TV too.

Armand can’t trick Lestat the way he does in the book into being imprisoned as Lestat is incredibly mentally fragile as well as physically fragile here in the book - psychologically and emotionally, and I just don’t see how he can be to this degree on the show, once again, given the above changes and that he cannot have just gone through these years of revenant-esque existence.

Armand can’t see Lestat’s scars as he does in the book.

Armand can’t feel the level of triumph he does in the book.

Lestat’s vanity matters here - when Armand is taking him to the theatre, he does’t want to be *seen*, but given he never looked more immaculate than at the trial, he can’t be bothered about this…. Like book-Lestat wouldn’t want to see Louis in Paris as he’d be ashamed of being seen how he was there by Louis, for example.

Lestat is in fact so fragile here, that even is courage deserts him.  I want to see this Lestat in Paris, but I cannot conceive of how it could be possible given the changes on TV.

Assad would be so brilliant conveying Armand’s incandescent range at Lestat reminding him all he’d given him and expecting something now in return, when from Armand’s perspective, he hasn’t let go of what Lestat did to the old coven at all… but all of this can’t happen on telly…

Lestat can’t be kept in the Bosch basement of literal Hell….. nor can he be shoved with barely any warning into the trial as he rehearsed it on TV…. Might Armand keep him in one of the coffins in the cellar, like Nicki, like Louis for a time? (See quote p508). I don’t think so, but it is possible…

Claudia going silently into death didn’t happen.  It’s really sad how Lestat describes this in the book.

Armand pushing Lestat off the tower - it’s just too similar to the Louis-Lestat drop… unless Armand literally replicates it to punish Lestat???  But if that’s the case it isn’t like the book in any case.

Lestat being stuck in Paris (a place of trauma for him) for 2 years till he is strong enough to get back home can’t happen.

Armand’s vision of restoration to SadStat p514 can’t happen BUT I WANT IT.  I love how it echoes the glorious vision from when Lestat was but a baby vampire too, that Anne wrote in that magnificent prose!

Armand can’t watch over Lestat for 55 years in NOLA as Lestat sleeps like in the book, I’m sure.  Might he during Lestat’s 1800’s nap?  It’s described how he does this by Louis in the book on p531

Louis can’t have thought Lestat was dead… not pre-rock star era a anyway as he’s literally just seen him!  Too many changes for that.  In the books, when Louis visited Lestat, he thought he was dying a mortal old-age-esque death and he left him anyway, which for me amps up the tragedy of it, as Louis loves Lestat, yet leaves him.  Leaves him thinking he may never see him again, as he may now die.  And maybe it’s what he deserves.  And maybe it’s a kindness.  And now he is alive and restored here… but it can’t be this way on TV.  Things are not this way.

Lestat being sarcastic is fun:

Sarcastic about other vampires in fiction p502

And again, p530

Lines for TV

Harecatcher/ratcatcher from Armand to Lestat

Delicious it was, the hatred between us, or so I thought.  Such unfamiliar excitement, to have him there to ridicule and despise.

"I can't deceive you," I answered. "I can't love you. What are you to me that I should love you? A dead thing that hungers for the power and the passion of others? The embodiment of thirst itself?” - but when?  As not in NOLA…..

I hope Lestat says this “The earth was holding me. Living things slithered through its thick and moist clods against my dried flesh. And I thought if I ever do rise again, if I ever see even one small patch of the night sky full of stars, I will never, never do terrible things. I will never slay innocents. Even when I hunted the weak, it was the hopeless and the dying I took, I swear it was. I will never never work the Dark Trick again. I will just ... you know, be the "continual awareness" for no purpose, no purpose at all.”

I’m sure Louis will call Lestat Monsieur Le Rock Star.

“I think to be this happy is to be miserable, to feel this much satisfaction is to burn.” Lestat, on being with Louis.

“And I had always loved him, hadn't I, no matter what happened, and how strong could love grow if you had eternity to nourish it, and it took only these few moments in time to renew its momentum, its heat?” Such a lot of love in this meeting.

Hopefully we get to see Louis protect Lestat by punching someone like he does p544….

Dionysus in San Francisco:

Questions:

Q How will a rockstar tour work?  Akasha appearing at the final concert and that being San Francisco?  I guess the music industry is very different now… you wouldn’t get someone as famous as Lestat describes with such buzz yet who’d never performed live, I think…. Also, Louis worries about Lestat performing one concert… how will he feel about a whole tour?  When will Akasha wake?  How will Marius play Lestat’s music to her?

Q Will Lestat write an actual book?  Or will it be something else?  And how will Louis consume whatever it is?

Q P529 What’s the pain Lestat senses in Louis?  “I sensed a pain in him, running like a vein of ore through his whole being, a vein that could carry feeling to the coldest depths.” Yearning? Worry?  Guilt?  Regret?

Q Lestat seeks meaning to fit the age, but The Age now is the 2020’s, not the 1980’s.  What is the spirit and meaning of right now?

Q Any lines you think might be used as song lyrics?

Q: Will Lestat’s rockstar career be compared to Nicolas and the Theatre Des Vampires?

What Lestat is doing with his rockstar stuff is very similar to what Nicolas was doing with the Theatre des Vampires 200 years earlier. Both of them are actually revealing true vampire experience though art, which is perceived by mortals as only art.

But actually Nicolas did it in a more artistic & darker & meaningful way - with some kind of actual lesson about true evil in his art & the artistic expression of his own experience.

However, Lestat in true Lestat style goes all out on charisma & fun & entertainment & wants to create joy & enjoys the kind of pagan/religious/Witches’ Place Rapture of it all.

But, Lestat despises Nicolas’ art as a vampire: because it is so vampiric & inhuman. He calls it ‘petty’. But it *is* at least Nicki’s genuine expression.  And I don’t think we can argue anything other than that it was ‘better’ art, too!  And Lestat - you and Nicki both *are* vampires!  You made Nicki this!

In any case, what on Earth would 1780’s Lestat say to his own 1980’s art!!!?!

Lestat even calls his own lyrics puerile… so why does he not even want to make good art?  The lyrics in all caps and the fact they were vampire capes… it is all SO cheesy!!

I am also reminded of Lestat’s first on-stage vampire breakdown with his rockstar feats - there’s a similar vibe, except in a new era, where Lestat no longer scares as these humans can believe these things possible that weren’t possible 2 centuries earlier.

Q Lestat reading a Bowie biography at some point?  Surely some biography of some musician we’ll see…?

Lestat literally screams “"I AM EVIL! EVIL!”” P541 and it is SO Nicolas screaming what he truly is at passersby… yet the impact is different as 2025 is different.  But I feel you could parallel this somehow if you so chose to.

The concert is described as almost transcendental.

“Deliver me from this, deliver me from loving it. Deliver me from forgetting everything else, and sacrificing all purpose, all resolve to it. I want you, my babies. I want your blood, innocent blood. I want your adoration at the moment when I sink my teeth. Yes, this is beyond all temptation.” - Love me to death.

Notes:

“Our record album” is so antiquated!  Is it Lestat or Anne, out of touch?  Anne wasn’t old when she wrote TVL, so maybe it is intentionally Lestat?

Louis knows Lestat seeks him when he drives Diivisadero Street (p522 & p527)

Vampire loneliness on p523 “I realized that I possessed a new concept of loneliness, a new method of measuring a silence that stretched to the end of the world. And all I had to interrupt it were those menacing recorded preternatural voices which carried no images as their virulency increased:”

Lestat wants to feel the love of an audience, from the adoring swathe.  To be the God.

“My Louis” p523

“And at odd moments I remembered those long-ago nights at Renaud's little theatre too clearly. The strangest details came back, the feel of the white paint as I had smoothed it over my face, the smell of the powder, the instant of stepping before the footlights.” When I was 8 I was in Laurel’s ballet - a ballet written by a girl who’d once danced at the dancing school and tragically died young (I didn’t know her.  I was only 8.  She hadn’t been at the dancing school when I was there. I presume she must have died in her early 20’s and left the dancing school before I began when I was 2.)  Anyway, I was the youngest group in the ballet - we were 8-18 and it was all about the sea.  People played pearls, seahorses, the rainbow, the swirling waves, the sun…. But me?  I was SEAWEED.  To cap off the insult, most characters got a choreographed dance, but we just had to lie over rocks, still for the majority of the ballet then swirl about randomly for a moment.  But we also wore one-shoulder, poo BROWN leotards with thick, hurts hard elastic in and with straggly bits of green dangling off them on and our entire face and arms and legs and shoulder were covered in green greasepaint.  We did two shows some days and I can still smell that green greasepaint… which,  is NOT easy to get off, may I add! Just, Lestat talking of his painted face brings that smell and feeling back to me, too.

“"I want to affect things, to make something happen!”” Is this the root of Lestat?  Despite all in his mind, Lestat is a doer.

Salamander is hilarious.  I hope they keep the name on TV.

The oyster shell swimming pool is so ’80’s.

I love how Lestat describes Louis is this part of the book, and seeing Jacob and Sam together as Louis and Lestat with this vibe is going to be so beautiful.  I drew hearts all over the pages.

The embrace on page 526 reminded me of the S2E8 embrace?

“It was like taking pictures from the attic, cleaning away the dust and finding the colors still vibrant. And the pictures should have been portraits of dead ancestors and they were pictures of us.” - Such exquisite and evocative description. And “everything growing older, except us.” There’s a new sense of time for Lestat now.

Are you interested?  Yes, you know I am… hehehehehe - this will be electricity.

I love Lestat feeling too much to be able to say he loves Louis.

“I didn't tell him about the mortal part, the vanity of wanting to perform, the eerie madness that had come over me when I saw myself on the television screen, saw my face on the album covers plastered to the windows of the North Beach record store.” We could ask Sam if he can relate to Lestat here?

P532 Louis tells Lestat he thinks he understands but does he really - just as Allessandra did in Les Innocents so long ago.

P533 - talk of evil to fit the age… how would a vampire fit in in 2025?

P536 Love the talk of coming back to each other… though likely doesn’t fit for TV in quite this way.

“the love I felt for him was positively humiliating.”

“The morning was too empty after he had gone.”

P536 - crazy that Lestat has never actually even been to a gig to watch!  And it is interesting how he describes the experience of performing in such a religious-ritualistic way, that reminds me of Mael’s druid ceremonies and The Witches’ Place more than it reminds me of Renaud’s.  

I’d forgotten how many scythes there are in the last section!  How did they get them through security?!

Lestat and Louis both have the power to burn people on TV… not just Akasha, so some of this will be different.

I’m excited to see Gabrielle and Louis together!  What does Louis think of Gabrielle?  What does Louis understand of Lestat from meeting Gabrielle?

So interesting how you can feel the calm Akasha projects to Lestat and he alone.

“"That music of yours could wake the dead.”” Is such a Mum thing to say, haha!

“And I felt the voiceless cry rising out of me and traveling into oblivion. I could almost feel it traverse the world of visible proportions, feel it grow fainter and fainter, feel it burn out.” Gorgeously written!

I feel so bad for Marius at the end here.  Though he also, once again, did play Lestat’s music to Akasha!  I love the many repetitions of earlier phrases in this last section of the book - echoes through time.

“Alien, utterly foreign, yes.

But not uncivilized, no, not savage. She was not that. She was only just reawakened, my goddess, risen like a magnificent butterfly from its cocoon. And what was the world to her? How had she come to us? What was the state of her mind? Danger to all of us. No. I don't believe it! She had slain our enemies. She had come to us.” - lovely 

The end is great as a TV series ending!  Better than for a book!

“But I couldn't fight the drowsiness and heaviness any longer. Pure sensation was driving out all wonder and excitement. My body grew limp and helplessly still against the earth.

And then I felt a hand suddenly close on mine.

Cold as marble it was, and just about that strong.

My eyes snapped open in the darkness. The hand tightened its grip. A great mass of silken hair brushed my face. A cold arm moved across my chest.

Oh, please, my darling, my beautiful one, please! I wanted to say. But my eyes were closing! My lips wouldn't move. I was losing consciousness. The sun had risen above.”

I wonder how they will portray how Lestat feels towards Akasha on TV?

[ninehclls]

There was something intimate about this. The way his fingers soothed their way through his hair from root to tip. The careful brushes along where thick strands rooted in his scalp and where his horns erupted from his hairline. Tav would purr, if he were able. Instead he felt the quiet devastation of having let himself be known, and intense drowsiness.

That lack of sleep had caught up to him it seemed. Even still, he wasn't too far gone just yet.

His lips quirked at the corners, and his head tilted back to rest more solidly on Astarion's shoulder. Not so firm that he couldn't be pushed away, of course, but there. Clearly relaxed, though well aware that he'd made whatever Astarion was doing a bit more difficult.

"I don't want to steal your recipe," he admitted softly, turning his head into Astarion's neck to give him better access to the braid that normally rested just behind his ear. That also put his nose very close to the short curls framing the elf's jaw.

Gods, but Astarion smelled delightful. And now, by the grace of gentle hands, so did he. "I just think it might be my favorite smell now. It isn't like the Gate or Rivington smell particularly good. This, though... I could roll in this scent forever. I like how you smell a lot."

Tav's voice was beginning to take on a sleep-rasp. His tongue was loose and he would be horribly embarrassed for it come morning. Or whenever he woke, considering the interruption to his rest. He was already drifting when he felt his head pulled to the side.

Though Astarion did not breathe, Tav could practically feel him inches from his skin. Considering it. Anticipation turned to confusion and disappointment when he pulled away. Rejected the offer outright, even. He was too tired to feel the rejection too sharply, however. Instead, he gently changed tact.

A hand lifted to brush along Astarion's jaw. Tentative but affectionate. It dropped quickly to his own chest like a stone, even that effort becoming too great for him in his comfort. "Well... don't ever starve. I know how that feels... and if you ever need it, I want you to take it."

this was not part of the plan but he supposed whatever plan there was had been fragile, at best. a web made of dusty ideas and not the strong silk of a spider really ready to feast on some unassuming fly. he kept telling himself he would put together more clear steps, would maybe even write them down in elvish somewhere secretly for his own sanity...

but it just never happened.

and yet things fell into place, just not how he meant them to and by doing things he didn't think he would at all.

"it's my own creation. rosemary oil, mostly, but other things that are secret and no you may not know, little devil," he clucked softly.

all the knots were gone but still astarion stroked the comb through, over and over again until he could only work on a thick clutch of strands held aloft while tav settled backward further and further.

his fingers splayed and the strands fell like liquid through his fingers, the comb set aside now so he could reach up and delicately maneuver tav's head to one side so as to better expose that delicious column of throat.

ah, but those words! not the first time he had heard such a confession but this time they stunned properly. had he any breath it would have hitched, if he had a heart that could beat it would skip and lurch.

"thank you. i'm not very hungry, as it were. lots of boar this evening, nearby," his voice was softer than he intended but he didn't want to disturb the already fragile peace.

he moved his hands back to their task and began to slowly braid in the little beads he had removed earlier.

[sysig]

Hi, sorry to be anon, but can I ask to see the Vargas family post trick or treating? Divying the goods, or just being tired from the event? Thank you and Happy Halloween!

Day 30 - Fine, but you're taking nightmare duty

[0ann3]

Haha, what if they saw the other out on a date but at that time didn't knew they were officially together-

Had a sudden hc/thought that if Floyd and Riddle are on a date, they're either holding hands or Floyd's hand will be on Riddle's shoulder

Meanwhile, Azul would prefer clinging holding onto Deuce's arm for whatever reasons

@thehollowwriter @distant-velleity (Hello once again AKSHAKShas)

[heyyesimtrash-whatofit]

Marty McFly VS The Doc-pocalypse or smth like that idk

I put way too much effort into what was supposed to be a stupid doodle so uh. Have this Tumblr. I really don’t have a better explanation for this other than I got two more Doc Pop! Figures today, which leaves me with a growing army of 3 Docs and one singular Marty, and I keep laughing every time I look at them in my display case so here we have Marty dealing with multiple Docs from different times that have all somehow ended up in the garage in 1986. Four dimensional thinking has never been his strong suit, and trying to figure this out is not helping. He’s got two hours of sleep, a bajillion positive encouraging post-it notes from the Doc of the present telling him to sleep, hot chocolate, and four very enthusiastic Emmetts crowding the lab. Send help. And caffeine. And maybe Clara cause he’s not so sure he can keep them from blowing something up for much longer.

Picture of the inspiration under the cut :)

Behold, my growing Doc army and my one single Marty McFly left to deal with them

At least Marty has his tunes. That might help him stay a little sane

[vagueconfusion]

I saw a take on TikTok that emo fashion was the beginning of copy and paste alt fashion and I thought about leaving a comment and decided against it but like

I think people who think that are severely underestimating exactly how much grunge and hardcore styles is the basis of what ye olde emo fashion was

[crumbleclub]

Something I think would destroy Michael when he finally got out of William's house:

At every turn, the adults who were supposed to care for him failed him. Now that he's an adult, nobody is expected to help him at all.