#but still I would say there is no character like zhou ying

[morethanwonderful]

Genuinely Zhou Ying from Tai Sui is one of the most insanity-inducing characters ever written, like

He's a prince. He's chronically ill. He eats almost nothing that isn't bland and medicinal. He hates his dad so much he wants to start a revolution to destroy him. He's born vaguely psychic and eventually becomes the closest thing his world has to omniscient. He starts his revolution by having two local politicians chopped into mincemeat, blended together, and poured out in the street. His favorite person in the world is his annoying little cousin that hides out at his house with him when he gets in trouble with his parents. He's probably a sociopath. He's murderous enough that all his servants and subordinates are scared of him. He has the same clothes made for himself every year. He founds and runs his universe's version of the CIA. He had his bones magically removed as a baby. He's a commentary on the way that psychotic and neurodivergent children are often villainized and mistreated by their caretakers. He has his bones un-removed over 20 years later. He's faking his chronic illness to cover up other, weirder chronic illness related to the bone removal and psychic thing. He loves his grandma. He purposely engineered his mother's miscarriage as a young child. He can turn himself into mist and break off chunks of his body while in mist form. He grew up with his consciousness halfway bound to a hell bubble full of demons. He has a personal assassin/assistant/general-purpose henchman that can turn into paper and ride around in his sleeve. He sometimes calls the henchman a cutesy nickname. He was partially raised by the living embodiment of emotional manipulation. He sometimes calls his annoying little cousin an even cutesier nickname. He tries to destroy the whole world in a fit of grief when he thinks his cousin's dead. He basically kills himself in order to plonk his soul into a magic mirror and see beyond the bounds of reality. He treats his own life and body as expendable assets because he was bred and raised to be a human sacrifice. He didn't speak for years as a child because the way he spoke scared his mother. His experience of the world is so alien and incomprehensible to others that a man with the power to play souls as music cannot understand his tune. He's a case study of the fact that sometimes you simply cannot save someone who doesn't want saving. He's thin and sickly from his illness but canonically beautiful. He has his father's eyes. He spoils his pet cat.

[alipeeps]

Episode 19

SERIOUS SPOILERS in this one, jfc do NOT read ahead if you have not already watched ep 19!! 😭😭

Wait where did all the other demons go? We only saw Li Lun let one out and leave with her.

"You're the reason I have nothing" says Li Lun??

Ooooh Li Lun killed all the people keeping the demons in cages... and the "fight" we saw a glimpse of earlier was Zhu Yan stopping Li Lun from killing one more person.

So Zhu Yan was trying to stop Li Lun from indiscriminate killing, which would surely get him in trouble, and Li Lun saw it as Zhu Yan putting humans over demons and protecting people who had hurt demons...

Oh SHIT!! Oh wait! That flare of power when he stopped him was NOT intentional! It was the ever-burning fire branch that was absorbed into Zhu Yan.... and Li Lun is a fucking tree demon! He accidentally kinda set him on fire?

He didn't mean to hurt you Li Lun, just to stop you from killing!

Shit he killed the clinic patients, not even the bad guys who imprisoned the demons. As I said, indiscriminate killing. But as far as Li Lun is concerned, all humans are the same, all are guilty...

Okay point of order, how come Li Lun calls him Zhao Yuanzhou in these flashbacks? Cos I thought he only got given that name by the Baize Goddess, and I thought he only started spending time with her later on, when he was mired in sadness? The Zhu Yan in these scenes is still young and (relatively) carefree?

Uh, your Zhuo Yichen fanboy is showing Zhu Yan...

Ayyy gang to the rescue!

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!! What the fuck did you do to my baby boy?!!!

Divine power?! Is Bai Jiu part-god? Is he like Ying Lei and half-demon, half-god?

Ugh, Zhu Yan telling the others to get Bai Jiu to safety and confronting Li Lun alone... except he is NOT alone because Zhou Yichen stayed with him!

Oh dang. Well, she wasn't wrong that Li Lun would want to torture her in front of Zhu Yan.

Ooooh so he WAS trying to curse her and control her into hating Zhu Yan.

Another thing I love about this drama is the realism... which sounds daft to say about a very much fantasy drama but what I mean is bits like this... when the script/story calls for a character to get wet/be submerged in water... they actually DO it. There's no CGI/fake underwater scenes, and no actors with hair and clothing that has basically just been spritzed so it is barely damp... they actually get them properly submerged and wet.

Yes boi, use that ice water power!!

Damn boy, you so fucken cool...

Oooh he cut him with a blade coated in his own blood... and therefore malicious energy...

"I now carry blood with malicious energy"... meaning.. he didn't before? Or just... his malicious qi levels weren't previously high enough that it infected his blood too? I mean... Li Lun obviously knew about him absorbing malicious qi, hence the whole blood moon plot...

Oh fucking GO Wen Xiao!!

Took that fucker by complete surprise and swiped his weapon right out of his hands!!

Smash it! See how he fucking likes it!

Okay that was dumb, you decided to try and use it instead.

Oooh we saw that earlier when he escaped after the seal was broken - the skin on his arm is turning woodlike...

Yup... as I had surmised... Zhu Yan accidentally damaged him with the ever-burning fire back then... and because he is a tree demon... the fire of that burn has never gone out. He's been burning in agony ever since.

Aaaaaand that's another nice helping of guilt for Zhu Yan, who no matter how he tries seems to keep hurting people due to things that are out of his control...

Oh shiiiiit so being sealed by the baize token actually controlled the fire from the ever-burning wood. Otherwise he would have burned to ashes.

So if she hadn't sealed him, he'd be dead. And now that the seal is broken... he is burning again...

Wait up is he actually burning up right now? Like he's gonna die now? With 13 eps left?

Jfc give Hou Minghao ALL the fucking acting awards!!

So... the big bad is dead and gone? And we're only just over half way through.

So... am guessing the plot will now revolve around how to avert the two impending disasters of:

the wilderness collapsing if the baize token cannot be repaired; and

Zhu Yan destroying the human world when he inevitably loses control of the malicious qi.

Oh and here comes Chongwu fucking camp to join the party...

Oh so the bowl had the Yao water in it? But now it's polluted with blood...

I wouldn't necessarily believe what Li Lun said dude...

Yeah keep telling yourself that babes....

Oh wait, I hadn't realised it was Chongwu Camp AND Demon Hunting Bureau together?!

And let me guess, the purpose behind this unprecedented cordial entente is... to kill Zhu Yan?

Oh, arrest him is it? So your guy can then kill him and take his core.

Pleeeeeease tell me Demon Hunting Bureau isn't gonna sign off on this shit?

Since when is Sijing the Prime Minister's representative?

Also, Wen Xiao, sweetie, you should NOT be relying on Sijing to back you up... she's a fucking mole for Chongwu Camp!!

Aaaand there it is.

Uuuuuh okay... so mum is not dead? And yeah... there sure is a lot to explain to your kid fella... like how the fuck he's got divine power?!!

Can't see how Chongwu Camp's prison could hold Zhu Yan any better than Demon Hunting Bureau's if he really wanted to leave? (Am not seeing any demon-power suppressing charms). So I guess for the moment he doesn't want to leave...

Oh my, has our boy Yichen finally managed to acknowledge that things aren't quite so simple as black and white?

He sure fucking is!

I'm... starting to wonder if the dude behind the mask is gonna turn out to be... said prime minister?

Ooooh I stand corrected, they did put a bunch of suppressing tokens in his cell....

(Ngl my whumper's heart is still kinda hoping he will get injured/tortured whilst his powers are suppressed.... come on Chongwu Camp... do this one thing for me... )

Oh shiiiiiiit the Prime Minister is the "scholar" who attacked the dragon mountain god. He's had it out for demons since the start!!

Uhhhh that's a new look for Wen Xiao?!! I'm gonna guess this is a demon pretending to be her? Perhaps the same one that was doing the same in Li Lun's dream world?

Oh MAN, he were go again with flashback city!! And Zhu Yan has fucking known from the start that Sijing was a Chongwu spy and has used it against them!!

Oohhhh those fuckers lied to her that her brother was still alive and tried to use that as leverage - not knowing that she already knew for certain he was definitely dead.

So she's been pretending to be their mole all this time... to help Zhu Yan find out what they are up to.

Ahhhhh fucking epic!!

So Chongwu camp has been using demons for research... just like the clinic Li Lun and Zhu Yan busted all those years ago?

Okay wait I am CONFUSED. It was only 8 years ago that he and Li Lun busted the clinic? And that's what Li Lun was sealed for (so he's only been sealed for 8 years?) and that's when Zhu Yan wigged out under the blood moon?

So... Zhu Yan had already been hanging out with baize goddess long before that? And been given her brother's name?

But was also visiting the mortal world with Li Lun, seemingly carefree? So this hairstyle...

and this....

were a matter of maybe days apart? Was the grey hairstyle just something he used for visiting the mortal world with Li Lun? But we also saw him with that hairstyle being reprimanded by Ying Zhao for visiting the mortal world when he hadn't fully mastered malicious qi, which I had assumed was when he was much younger? Which is why I had assumed the grey plaited hairstyle indicated younger Zhu Yan? But I guess not?

Oh damn... mystery mask dude is... Xiao Bai's master? Ngl I did NOT fucking see that coming!

And he's been experimenting on demons all this time?

Has... has he experimented on Xiao Bai? Is that why he has divine power and was worried when asked if he was a demon? Have this fucker used demon/divine blood on him?

Oh FUCK and that's why he wants Zhu Yan's core! For his experiments!! A great demon's core!

Ohhh fuck that doesn't sound good...

I think this might be a trap...

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

WHAT

THE

FUCK?!!

NO! Noooooooooo!!! Not my baby Xiao Jiu!!

I AM NOT OKAY!!!

[another-kiraidesunosekai]

Personal Impression: Fangs of Fortune.

After watching the first episode, I already knew how this story would end.

It would end with tears like a river.

I knew many will die, even the lead character. I knew. Even so, I keep on watching it, every single episode, not even skipped any scene nor fast forward it.

Because of one reason ....

HIM.

Neo Hou is so gorgeous as the great demon!! >.<

I really like his make up and styling in this series. He really look like a 34.000 years old demon. His aura, demeanor, and his voice, really really resembles an old and presumptuous and flippant demon. Neo really did a great job for this role! BRAVO!

The story pace was quite slow though. Not only the story, but the dialogue, the movement, were also slow. I really have to hold out the urge to press the FF button. XD

And, although it came from the same director as My Journey to You, but the action scene movement isn't as thrilling as the previous one. Also, somehow they work too hard to give the heart warming feeling and the slightly comedy at the early episodes. Everyone always shed tears, even from the first episode. It feels like a rehearsal for the sad ending. XD

Everyone is trying too hard to ease each other pain that it looked unnatural for me.

BUT!!!

I do love this family.

A family consist of demons, a goddess, an human, a young mountain god, and an half human-half god.

I wish they would be together till the end and on. Doing adventure and demon hunting together.

Then again, it's Chinese drama land. We often get different kind of ending than we wanted, even if it was adapted from a novel and has an happy ending. I really don't understand with this kind of "satisfaction" to have a sad end, rather than an happy ending where everyone would smile and be happy. XD

Zhao Yuanzhao (Neo Hou) was actually a pitiful character. He was responsible of killing Zhou Yichen's brother and father, he has also killed Wen Xiao's mentor, the previous baizu goddess, and he was the reason for the death of Ying Lei's grandfather, the previous mountain god. All that because he was the vassal of malicious energy, and he can't control it (also can't control his own conscious). He also break up his friendship with Li Lun, the tree demon, which he accidentally hurt in a fight to protect the human. I could say, Zhao Yuanzhou's entire life is fill with misunderstanding.

I remember reading a comment saying, "In the first episode, Zhao Yuanzhou wanted to die because of what he has done, and in the final episode, he died when he wanted to live."

Damn. That hurts. Especially with the scene when Zhao Yuanzhou had to slapped himself before he sacrifice himself. He wanted to live with his loved ones, with his friends, but he has to make the biggest sacrifice. The death he has been wishing for. :((

Someone also said that Zhao Yuanzhou was like a sun for Li Lun as the sunflower. Li Lun only look at his sun, Zhao Yuanzhou, but the sun is actually owned by the people. That's touching, and it makes sense. But I still think Li Lun is like a brat which his favorite person was taken away by some other interest. XD

The sadness kind of traumatized me, even though I still able to made jokes when I watched it till the last episode, like "One down." XD

The characters were kind of pitiful, and it's always the demon side who suffers the most.

I'm quite happy that this series still have "connections" with real world, like the love between Miss Qi and Ran Yi was touching. They only wanted to be together, but their differences got in the way. "Whether you are a human or a demon, you are both my path and destination." It's like saying "I love you" in Fangs of Fortune's way. X3

When A Heng fights to protect his unconscious sister, Zhen Mei said he can't save his sister, and A Heng said, "I can't ... but I must." He know he won't stand a chance against Zhen Mei, but he still has to fight to protect his sister. That's a real power.

When Wen Xiao was poisoned and likely dying, she said that she doesn't want to die, and she still has lot of things she wanted to do. This is a natural reactions when we know that we only have little time left to live. Wen Xiao doesn't pretend to be strong by saying kind words like it's a sacrifice that she gladly will do as the baize goddess. The same thing with Ying Lei when he's dying, he said that he's scared and he doesn't want to leave ... my heart really broken for him. Ying Lei is my second favorite because of his cheerful nature. :((

I really like they still put that natural reactions and emotions as a common human would felt. (Note, Ying Lei's words were an adlib by the actor. Superb!)

There were several unforgettable moments in this series, including the death scenes. But, there's one that engraved in my mind. That one moment when Li Lun confronted Zhao Yichen who was about to turned into a demon. At first Li Lun was being all above Yichen, then it was the opposite. Yichen succeed to put some conscious into the stunned Li Lun. Li Lun wanted Yichen to be depressed and become a demon like him, yet Yichen stay righteous just like Zhao Yuanzhou had said about him. Yichen even said he becomes to understand Zhao Yuanzhou, rather than to Li Lun. That's like a totally defeat for Li Lun.

And lastly, Zhao Yuanzhou words to Wen Xiao, that when he died, he will become the rain and comes down to stay by her side.

Zhao Yuanzhou, do you know, because of that words, every time the rain came down now, I always said, "Da Yao, it's raining." TwT

Oh, well ... for me, it's quite good series. Although I still dislike the end, and even the special episode didn't do any good ....

Just remember, that it's a dream, and when you wake up, everyone actually living a happy life together, just like in the ending scene dance. XD

Neo Hou really did a great job in portraying a thousand years old demon. X3

[deepestbluesky]

hello it is time for a VERY niche post. join me for... SHL characters as SNAKES!!!!! i tried to find snakes that naturally occur in china or near china, as a terrible added parameter—there's a TON of snakes in china, but i just don't know many so it's terrible bc it added a lot of work for me lol. but i've learned things! and found some cool snakes! so! let's go. pictures of snakes ahead, if that's not your thing, feel free to peace out.

Wen Kexing - Sinomicrurus macclellandi a coral snake! just a nice boy you know? just a nice, extremely venemous boy with dramatic red coloration. shamless plug for my fic where wkx turns into This Snake.

Zhou Zishu - Bungarus multicinctus look at this lovely unassuming snake. got some goth-y drama but overall not too bad, right? one of the most venomous land snakes in the world 😌 (also. he and wkx match but like in a complimentary way.)

Zhang Chengling - Pareas margaritophorus the first thing wikipedia says about this snake is that it is small and harmless. for the first time so far, i am not trying to mislead you. just a little snek boi!!!!!! cute!!!!!! I Want To Hold And Protect Him

Gu Xiang - Fowlea piscator look i'm gonna be honest. there are not a lot of snakes that are even REMOTELY purple but this one has a little purple whip tongue! also, not venemous but (if it's anything like water snakes in the US) kind of an asshole. apparently pretends to be a cobra. look at her go.

Cao Weining - Coelognathus radiatus this snake has no thoughts in its head. look at it. i don't mean as a species i mean This One. That's cwn. just sitting there doing a blep. no venom, apparently a defensive sort of dude. cool colors tho!

Luo Fumeng - Calliophis bivirgatus a different kind of coral snake! i've gone a bit further outside of china for this one but LOOK at how gorgeous it is. how could i not let lfm be this glamorous. also i like the idea that she's a different genus of snake than wkx but still a (venemous) coral snake.

Liu Qianqiao - Elaphe taeniura gonna be honest here, the common name of this snake in english is the beauty snake (or ratsnake), so i didn't think too much farther. there's a ton of different color morphs of it. look at it, the elegance! she's beauty she's grace she'll constrict you (if you are a small mammal)!

Xie Wang - Bungarus fasciatus this is a different krait! zzs has MANY bands, xw just has bands. a little brighter colored and more extra than zzs, sliiiightly less deadly, still can very definitely kill you. LOOK at that warning coloration. if i was to pick two characters to DEFINITELY have warning coloration, it WOULD be wkx and xw.

Du Pusa - Euprepiophis mandarinus this is NOT my best work, but i just thought this snake was really pretty and so i was determined to include it somehow. hence: dps. they are ~secretive~ apparently. also. again. Look At It

Ye Baiyi - Python bivittatus BIG BOY!!!! ALMOST THE BIGGEST BOY!!!!! does occur in white color morphs in captivity (and like, i guess presumably in the wild? at one point? but i have to imagine that's like. not so much a thing anymore.) also, did i pick the picture that looks the most like a cryptid? of course i did, it's yby. he doesn't want his picture taken. he doesn't want you to know he exists even. leave him alone. where he belongs in his natural habitat.

Han Ying - Lycodon septentrionalis a shiny pretty boy. a shiny pretty boy who looks very much like a many-banded krait, in fact. however, they're not venemous. hy just looks like zzs. again: LOOK AT THIS GOOD SNEK.

Jing Beiyuan - Ahaetulla prasina several things here. one, this is an elegant but strange boy (i don't think this shows just how weird this guy's nose looks. it's like someone took a snake's nose and used pliers to stretch it out all pointy). two, FASHION!!! look at those pattens!!!!! a striking example. and three, it looks kind of like wu xi's snakeclet

Wu Xi - Naja atra he's a cobra. i think this speaks for itself.

[aiyexayen]

while im gathering the energy to continue our amazing discussion: i would love to hear of what youre currently working on!! also please i dont have anything against long answers idc about how winding it is how much ull end up rambling just share smth ure currently working on and that sparks ur passion if there is smth like that! <3

oh gosh! what am i working on? my energy is very scattered lately due to Health and Adult Bullshit but my brain is definitely still churning. let's see.

i wish i could say i was working on more word of honor stuff actively but tbh my brain is taking a vacation in stardew valley lately so apart from a few word of honor meme bits i'm picking away at, a lot of my creative output is elsewhere.

one of my current writing projects is a sdv au where The Farmer (player character) never takes over The Farm, and instead one of the other characters in town ends up buying it and moving in to get out of his shitty situation, and then he ends up getting close to another character and, you know. sparks. drama. gay. because as fun as self-insert stuff is in an inherently self-insert game, i am always jumping on random ship trains and rarepairs. (this one is sebastian/shane)

unsure if i'll ever post it or if it'll just be something i play with for awhile but it's been a fun idea to spin while i play the game myself and watch speedrunners and vibe.

i'm also spending some creative energy poking away at mods for said stardew valley. the pc version has a robust modding community and i've made a couple surface level visual mods before. lately i've been toying with the idea of a more in-depth character overhaul mod i'd be co-writing with someone, and we'll see if that goes anywhere. lots of story reworking to hash out and coding to learn if so.

oh! i do have a word of honor fic i'm very passionate about but have yet to put pen to page beyond writing the outline. it's a sequel to my fic everything that you're not supposed to do, which is about liu qianqiao joining tian chuang under zhou zishu's leadership close to the beginning of it, and the years she spent there with him and han ying. it's one of my favourite fics of mine and i want the sequel So Bad, i'm excited for it and the themes i'm going to explore in it. wen kexing finally gets to make an appearance, and liu qianqiao and han ying both get to figure out exactly who they want to be in the wake of tian chuang / zhou zishu being their everything. it's a lot about self-discovery and healing and fucked up gay shit. probably less about poisons than the first one but i'm sure we'll work something out.

[a few days later]

okay so i started writing this answer, and got distracted reading my outline of that very wip, and started writing on it, and now have most of a scene hashed out, and also i forgot to come back and hit send on this post.

so. i guess i'm a liar and i am in fact working on this story now too 😂

~proof~

[chaotic-aro-incarnate]

10 BL BOYS I WILL THROW HANDS FOR

Was tagged by @scarefox for this (technically my main blog but I post my bl stuff on here lol) and am very excited

I imprint on characters like nobody's business so this is a list made for me

EDIT changed the gifs because apparently the way I did it didn't properly link to the creators (only on desktop at least). should be properly credited now

In no particular order

1) Sound (My School President)

Starting the trend of lonely queer teenagers that I get a little too attached to, it's of course Sound. Like I was already a fan of Sound and intrigued by the concept of SoundWin (at the time people didn't know it was going to be the main secondary ship) but when the medal scene happened and Sound gave this so sad ans soft "oh no" look I was gone. That is my son and I WILL fight anyone and everyone for him

2) Nuengdiao (Never Let Me Go)

Another lonely queer teenager I decided to protect. I loved Never Let Me Go so much and Nueng was my special little babygirl and then Our Skyy 2 came out and it was like oh...... I will kill for him. Look I love Nueng and he did nothing wrong and also that scene where he's forcing Palm to put the gun to his head while screaming at him to shoot him leaves rent free in my mind. He's so traumatized and lonely and he's like 18 I would do anything for him especially throw hands

3) Typhoon (Star in My Mind)

Fun fact! I had to stop watching Star in My Mind because I got so unreasonably attached to Typhoon that I couldn't bear the thought of him not getting a happy ending. I wanted him to end up with Dao so bad because it would make him happy and I knew that if I kept watching they would either break his heart OR show that he's actually not that great of a guy, both which were unbearable to me. So I simply cut my losses and live in the fantasy that he got everything he ever wanted.

4) Bai Lang (My Tooth Your Love)

One of those "he just like me fr fr" characters who I would do anything for. He's my specialist little boy and I love him so dearly. Here's to having your trauma swag bewitch the local hot autistic dentist body and soul.

5) Han Ying (Word of Honor)

Talk about my specialest boy. Ying'er is my guy through and through. He deserved so much better and in every WoH fic I have written (they are all still in drafts) he lives and is happy no matter what. He IS my sweet cheese, my rotten solider, my good time boy. I will continue writing him getting railed to the high heavens by Zhou Zishu and Wen Kexing like he deserves. He is incapable of being anything other but the goodest boy possible and I will die on this hill

6) Boston (Only Friends)

He is the worst. I would move mountains for him. Enough said.

7) Pluem (Ghost Host Ghost House)

Look this man has been going through it AND he manages to be the like the most flirtatious and romantic guy around? Give me your secrets sir. Also say the word king and I'll do it. This show broke me on so many levels but a lot of those levels were tied to anytime I saw him break down

8) Ye Huo/Fire (Guardian)

A recent (and somewhat obscure) pull as I am currently watching Guardian and was just exposed to his character today but he is my guy and I will defend him to the death. The only weaker point for me than a lonely gay teenager is a self appointed older sibling who sacrifices everything for their younger siblings. I was really like man this guy is an asshole for so long but then the truth of how he was saving the boys at the fighting ring came out and I was like oh no that's my son now and I need him to live and be happy. I have not finished his arc yet so I am scared that it'll be a tragedy BUT he is my wonderful son all the same and I will throw hands for him in an instant

9) That (Manner of Death)

The return of troubled teenagers I need to adopt and protect against all costs. I WILL fight anyone for him even though he's like a rebellious teenager who does crime and I am a strange looking college student who he would not respect but it's the thought that counts

10) Mark/Village Head Ma (Love Tractor)

Why is there a random white man living in rural South Korea? I don't know!!! They never address what he's doing there. But I literally love this man. There's a reason I made him to be my pfp for bl-bracket. Seriously he's the best and I will fight anyone who says otherwise. Best character ever written. In my heart he's got the spirit of Quincey Morris form Dracula in the long tradition of just having a random American man in your story with no explanation

Tagging others!!!!! @saturnskyline @non-binarypal7 @supernovasimplicity @vegussy and anyoen else who wants to!!

There's been so many of these types of challenges/tag things lately that I have not kept track of who has or hasn't done which ones so sorry if you've already done something similar

[syncogon]

[YB2] what other characters would the main cast want to play?

Translating an excerpt of 《团建吧！七斋》 [Seventh Room Teambuilding!] — one of the variety shows filmed with the main cast alongside Season 2.

Using the actor names and abbreviations. Note that Zhang Xincheng (Yuan Zhongxin) regrettably could not make it to this show (don't worry, they honored him with a cardboard cutout. they all agree that zxc is the actor most different from his character!).

This sort of question / what-if is always one of my favorites! I really liked the insight and character analysis here.

If you could play anyone else in this show, who would you pick? (regardless of gender/etc)

Su Xiaotong (Xiao-Jing): I want to play Wen Wuqi. 

Wang Youshou (Wang Kuan): Yeah… Those characters are really good.

Fu Weilun (Wei-yanei): At the very beginning, I was meeting Wen Wuqi. 

Zhou Yutong (Zhao Jian): You were auditioning for Wen Wuqi?

FWL: Right.

Zheng Wei (Xue Ying): You don’t seem calm enough.

FWL: Wait, no, I was still trying out for Yanei first.

ZW: But you also tried Wen Wuqi.

FWL: Right. 

ZW: And then the director still felt you fit Yanei best. (laughs)

ZYT: But that’s how it goes—whoever plays the character, it becomes theirs. If he played Wen Wuqi, it would become Fu Weilun’s Wen Wuqi. And if Xiao-Yu [Wen Wuqi] played Yanei, it would be Xiao-Yu’s Yanei. A thousand people will give one character a thousand different faces. No one can say for sure whether someone playing a role will for sure be good. But the director will definitely have a sense of what they’re looking for. 

FWL: Youshou I know, if you weren’t Wang Kuan, you wanted to play Yanei.

WYS: Right, I’ve said that before. But now, I… 

ZW: You want to play Yuchi Yuan.

WYS: Right, I really like Yuchi Yuan as a character. But I think that if I were to play him, I probably wouldn’t be able to make him as comical. 

ZYT: But, putting aside for now whether or not you think you’re suitable—

SXT: Just based on pure liking. 

ZYT: Even gender can be changed. 

WYS: Then I’d like to play Yuchi Yuan. 

ZYT: That just means you like those kinds of very comical characters. 

WYS: Well, not really. I just like those kinds of interesting characters. 

ZYT: A bit more outgoing. More lively. 

ZW: More different from your real-life personality. 

WYS: Mm. Characters that are a bit more meaningful. 

ZYT: What about Zheng Wei?

ZW: Me? I think I kind of want to play Yanei. 

WYS: (grins) You also want to play Yanei?

ZYT: This character is so beloved!

FWL: Because it’s two extremes. I don’t shut up, and then Xue Ying doesn’t talk. (grins) He must feel so smothered every day, keeping it all in. 

ZW: And in real life, I think my personality is closer to Yanei’s. Good-natured, adaptable. Actually, Xue Ying is almost too different from me. (laughs)

ZYT: Yanei, who do you want to play?

FWL: (thinks for a moment) Earlier, I felt that Yuan Hao would be really interesting. Because of his conviction, he’s like that Thanos—

SXT: You probably want to play this character because you’re eying that throne of his. Lifted by a couple hundred people—

FWL: (laughing) That’s not it!

SXT: —sitting on top like a KING! (laughs)

ZW: How come no one wants to play Ningling Ge?

ZYT: (raises hand) Me.

ZW: You want to play Ningling Ge?

WYS: Why?

ZYT: I feel like this person is really interesting. You know, you say he’s evil—

ZW: Wicked.

ZYT: —or ruthless, or cruel. But then sometimes you’ll feel that he has that bit of warmth toward some things. For example how he treats his mother, or how he treats Zhao Jian. I feel like, even though he is also very ruthless toward Zhao Jian, I also feel that some of his interactions with Zhao Jian contain some of that warmth. But then, he’s still able to hide away this warmth of his, and then still carry out those extreme actions.

FWL: (overlapping) But he can’t hide it away completely, he can’t manage to be fully ruthless toward Zhao Jian.

ZYT: Right. And then he and his father, that storyline also made me feel, it has that feeling of ancient Greek tragedy, that kind of feeling. I just feel that his entire character is written to be quite tragic. And I feel like this person never received any kind of love, and so he doesn’t know how to love someone else. So, I’d still really want to try this kind of character. 

ZW: Still pretty impressive, really. 

[sunshine304]

Legend of Fei Ep 35

We start with some exposition! Shen Tianshu was in the Anping army (have we heard this before and I’ve just forgotten it or is this brand-new information, hm) and helped Hu Tianying as she fled from Big Medicine Valley. You know, after she destroyed it all because her master said that she was only good at poisons instead of healing and therefore would not make a good new master. I guess it was love at first sight.

Hu Tianying wants to go herself and kill Zhou Fei while she’s searching for the grass. Then she wants to help Shen Tianshu looking for the HTYS. I guess that even though Tianying is gravely ill, she is still better of right now than Shen Tianshu? Okay then.

Luo Tiankuang gets a new task from Hu Tianying. (We don’t know what, though.)

Zhou Fei asks the monks about the HTYS because that stupid thing seems to haunt her and now she really wants to know what it’s all about. The monks are like, “Yeah, understandable. But we can’t tell you. Please go ask your father.” Thanks for nothing, I guess! You obviously know about this thing, so why send her away from the important errant of getting the grass by first seeking out her father?

A-Fei doesn’t want to go and see Xie Yun before she leaves because she’s afraid that she won’t be able to leave his side again. T_T

A-Fei visits her father Lord Gantang, whom we haven’t seen in forever I think, at an army camp. It’s also been a long time since these two saw each other, but the show doesn’t want to tell us exactly how long. XD

He gifts her a new sword that he searched for a long time. He says that so many legendary blades have been lost or destroyed but he wanted to get her a really good one, and finally found this one. Optimistic of him considering Zhou Fei’s history of breaking swords. XD

Let’s check in with the one braincell trio! The boys are being their usual himbo selves. Ying Hecong is trying to get Yang Jin to drink some kind of poison so he can study its effects. Okay then. XD Li Yan has gotten a letter from A-Fei telling them that she is looking for Zhuming Grass. Ying Hecong is sad that Xie Yun still hasn’t died. That XY is truly hindering his scientific studies! XD

Sword exposition! Zhou Fei’s new blade was made by Lu Run who only made this one sword. He also had three disciples: one founded Big Medicine Valley, one the Qi School, and one went to the military.

Now we’re getting a flashback for Xie Yun because he hasn’t done anything but die for three episodes and the show wants to remind us why we love him! :D

We see Xie Yun’s first time out in the jianghu after living with the monks for such a long time. He doesn’t have a lot of money and runs out quickly, mainly because he gives some away freely to beggars on the street even though he himself is going hungry. But his good heart and helpful character lead to good things. When he gives advice to a storyteller about how he could make his stories better, he later gets a share of the man’s earnings because his advice brought in much more money. That’s also how Xie Yun gets the idea of making money with lyrics and poems, and Madame Nichang’s Feather Robe Troupe is mentioned. We of course know that they had a long-standing arrangement of Xie Yun providing the troupe with songs and poems to perform.

Xie Yun eats with the beggars and leaves them a poem on the wall. The army shows up and he hides in the rafters from them as they seem to be looking for him. This works because no-one in this show looks up above their heads when searching for someone, ever. XD

End flashback and Xie Yun is finally awake! Wang Yibo plays weak and suffering very well! They also gave him very pale lipstick to show how seriously ill he is. His first action after waking up is that he wants to draw something for A-Fei. The love is real! <3

Meanwhile, A-Fei learns from her father that the HTYS contains important treasures (though her father doesn’t know which ones) and that Shen Tianshu was in the army.

Oh no, Chen Zichen shows up…

He’s the third prince but Zhou Fei completely and rudely ignores him. XD Her father didn’t expect him and internally is like, “WTF is going on”. He tells A-Fei to greet Zichen. She does so, but in the most lacklustre, perfunctory and bitchy way I’ve ever seen. XD Xichen reacts with a sincerely meant, “Oh no, no need to be courteous!” XD Like, kid, she’s super pissed at you because Xie Yun unlocked his powers to safe you (because you’re the stupidest kid to ever live) and is now dying.

Zhou Fei leaves, ignoring Zichen. He smiles after her, sappily.

Oh.

Oh no.

OMG no!!! Stop talking!

OMG this is so embarrassing…

Xichen: “Well, I come because of a private matter regarding myself and Miss Fei.” Zhou Yitang draws the only logical conclusion because he knows his daughter and goes, “If she has offended you, I apologise…” but no, that’s not what Chen Zichen is on about. It’s much worse.

XD XD XD

Zichen: “I only think of her since I’ve met her and I want to marry her!” (basically, that’s the gist of it) Zhou Yitang: “For your own safety, don’t bother her.” Ohhh boy that sure is blunt. XD XD XD

This was the worst.

Thank god there’s a palate cleanser now because the show’s very own goddess Madame Nichang has another scene!

Li Sheng has found her and hopes she can cure Chuchu. Madam Nichang first scares him a bit until he starts begging on his knees, then she’s like, “Ah silly boy, she wore some safety armour, she’ll be fine after a few days of sleep and medicine.”

Meanwhile, Li Yan and the boys are at the Cloud Raising Valley (Little Medicine Valley) where A-Fei should show up soon because it’s where to get the Zhuming grass. Turns out Yang Jin is the sect leader here and had just fucked off. XD

We learn this from a very passive-aggressive disciple. XD No outsider is allowed to see the route into the village, so Li Yan and Ying Hecong get blindfolded. Li Yan pouts over it.

Yang Jin argues with his elder about all of this and then says he’ll go to the dangerous back hills himself to look for the grass even though he will likely die there. Ying Hecong approves of this because he doesn’t want to die. XD

Yang Jin says he doesn’t want to be sect leader anymore and someone else should do it. The elder is pissed. This is escalating quickly. XD Now the elder wants to punish Yang Jin and arrest (and kill I guess) Li Yan and Ying Hecong because Yang Jin shouldn’t have brought them along in the first place.

Li Yan and Ying Hecong can flee because everyone in that village is kinda incompetent. They wander around in the woods for a bit until they happen upon two guards whom they knock unconscious with one of Hecong’s poisons.

[killerandhealerqueen]

Love is Written in the Stars...I’m glad I watched it, I surprisingly enjoyed it more than I thought I would.  MangoTV is the god of fucking with my heart strings, that’s for fucking sure.

But anyways.  I originally started watching this just for Patrick and Ian but then as the episodes went on, I got sucked into the plot and the story and the characters.  Did I skip many a kiss/romantic scene?  Yes, because I don’t do romance but again, I still enjoyed it more than I thought I would.

As for the characters, I loved Ian and Patrick’s characters, oh my god they were delightful.  Little shits (affectionate).  I swear, Ning Lan was like if you took Chen Yuzhi’s body and shoved Jiang Yuelou’s feral personality into it.  That’s exactly who Ning Lan is.  As for Pei Yin, he’s the complete opposite of Yu Tangchun but he was delightful and I loved him. 

Wei Qi and Zhou Yuan both grew on me...I had more affection for Zhou Yuan than I did Wei Qi, and that’s mainly because him and his jealousy problem got on my fucking nerves.  Like my guy, chill. 

Li Mian and Xingyue were so fucking cute.  So cute.  And Li Mian’s character growth from being some playboy to being the most loyal fucking husband I have ever seen in my god damn life was just *chef’s kiss*. 

Lin Yan also grew on me.  Her relationship with Ning Lan was cute and her Ink Reading powers were quite interesting.  At first I thought she was going to be just some spoiled rich girl who was going to be the second female lead but then when you find out about her backstory you’re like babygirl, oh my god.  (I’m glad her shitty father is dead, jesus)

And I can’t forget about Xue Deng.  This motherfucker...this motherfucker, I thought he was going to be the fucking villain but I was wrong.  This boy is my poor little murder meow meow.  I love him.  He just wanted love and I’m glad he got to experience it through Wei Qi’s older sister and Wei Lin (and even passed on his powers to Wei Lin so that his death wasn’t for nothing).  This fucker grew on me so god damn fast...ugh.

Cui Ying...I still don’t like her, I’m sorry.  I just don’t.  I don’t have much to say about her other than I don’t like her.  I think I’ve said enough about her in my liveblogs for y’all to know why I don’t like her, so I won’t say it here.

Also, because it’s MangoTV, I thought they were going to pull an ep. 37 and they kind of did...they kind of did and it fucking hurt when we and Wei Qi realized that no one knew who Zhou Yuan was and that they had never heard of her...but I am glad that everyone sort of got their “happy ending” in the “fixed/normal” timeline.  Still hurts tho.  My heart and emotions were played with and I don’t much appreciate that (fucking emotional whiplash).  And it was quite a twist at the end to realize that the whole drama...was pretty much the story of Wei Qi and Zhou Yuan’s meeting and falling and love.  That was clever.

Would I watch it again?  No, probably not because again, I don’t do romance, but I would definitely jump around and rewatch scenes with Ian and Patrick because they were a delight.  If you like romance and comedy, I think you would enjoy this drama.  The angst will come out of left field sometimes though and it will hurt because it’s MangoTV. 

But I did enjoy it.  Surprisingly. 

[skullsandwineglasses]

Immortal Samsara - Ep 45

TZ: The first time that you watched the stars, I wasn’t able to be the one by your side, and it ended up being a painful memory for you. So now I hope to give you a happy sky of stars. 

~~~~

TZ: Have you ever liked me? 

YD: I can’t. 

~~~~

TZ: How much I wish that the person you first met and fell in love with was me. Wouldn’t it be nice if there was a next life? If there was a next life...

He says this while being completely ignorant to the fact that he is currently living his next life. He’s already been given a second chance to love Yan Dan. And this is it. He doesn’t know that his “next” life is to return to his previous life as Ying Yuan, where his situation is much worse. This is as good as it’s gonna get, and yet his still yearns for a next life with her where be hopes they can have a happy ending. How utterly tragic. 

Honestly, this was a great episode. Tang Zhou has nothing to lose now and is laying is heart bare to Yan Dan. He doesn’t want to die with any regrets. The man is flirting for his life. He is unknowingly trying to right all of Ying Yuan’s wrongs. Cheng Yi entirely owned this episode. And not to mention that Xuan Ye finally makes an appearance. Apparently Cheng Yi used his own voice for Xuan Ye? It’s so raspy and husky. 

I read on bilibili how Tang Zhou is like Ying Yuan’s love letter to Yan Dan, and he truly is. Tang Zhou is basically everything Yan Dan dreamed of with Ying Yuan. 

And then there was his line in episode 44 where he says pleadingly after Yan Dan had left: “That person who hurt you wasn’t me.” Oh yes, sir, it was most definitely you. 

Ugh, I’m going to miss Tang Zhou. Such a carefree version of Ying Yuan who can love without inhibition. And Tang Zhou is trying so desperately to dissociate himself from Ying Yuan. He cannot fathom that he would ever hurt, leave, or betray her, because he’s currently so willing to give everything up for her in a heartbeat. The Three Realms aren’t his responsibility. He doesn’t want that responsibility. He’s not righteous. He’s selfish. Why does everyone keep complimenting him on his righteousness? Sorry to that man, but Tang Zhou does not recognize him. 

And then seeing the brief scene with Xuan Ye makes you wonder what his father would have wanted for Ying Yuan. This passionate demon lord whose son has been forced to lock away his emotions for thousands of years and can only get some temporary emotional fulfillment by reincarnating as a mortal, and even then, he still suffers from being forced to suppress his feelings. I know nothing of Xuan Ye atm, but I’d like to think he’d raise hell at the idea of his son suffering. 

But I’ve just been really disappointed at how Yan Dan has been reacting (or rather, lack of reacting) to things since regaining her memories. I’m not sure if it’s the way that Yang Zi is portraying her, or if her maturation has just been poorly written and developed. But I’d like to think it’s the latter, considering how much Yu Mo’s character has been butchered and reduced as well. 

Yan Dan is just really hard to read now. Does she still love Ying Yuan/Tang Zhou or not? I get that she’s trying to hold back her feelings, but it just feels like there’s something missing. The spark is no longer there. 

Edit: Considering that Xuan Ye seems power hungry and possibly out to get his own son, maybe my idealistic fantasy of him loving his son is a stretch (I haven’t watched any of the trailers, so I have no idea what’s coming, but based on the scene, I’m guessing he’s still alive and wants revenge?), but in any case, Yang Ying/Tang Zhou is still such a tragic hero. 

[the-music-maniac]

You ever notice how similar Xie Wang and Han Ying’s stories and character arcs are?

A warning here that this contains spoilers for all of Word of Honor/Shan He Ling. Stop reading now, I reference a ton of shit.

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I was actually discussing a couple fic ideas with a friend a few weeks ago, and I got to wondering after thinking about those parallels I could see -

Does Han Ying x Xie Wang exist as a ship?? Is that a thing?? That exists?? Can it please exist??

It has so much potential. There's so many narrative parallels with these two characters.

They're two people who deserved better than their respective endings, who never got what they wanted, because of the manipulation of men who wanted power and would stop at nothing to get it (Jin Wang and Zhao Jing). The manipulation of those who saw them as less then what they were.

They also have similarities in their relationships with their "mentor figures" - Han Ying and Zhou Zishu, and Xie Wang and Zhao Jing. They have quite a lot of differences too, enough that their lives parallel each other instead of mirror, and I just think that their personal experiences could make for a very compelling storyline if these two were to interact. It would be an interesting road to a development of a potential relationship, and moreover an opportunity for both of them to learn from the other and heal.

And real talk? I just want the both of them to be happy tbh (and of course that obviously doesn't need to involve a romantic relationship - I just have no self control. I'd be just as ecstatic about a really good friendship though).

I also know they never interact in the drama - but then again these two are also literally dead in the drama. Reality is what you make it 🤣🤣. And considering how close the Scorpion was working with Tian Chuang - honestly I'm pretty sure you can't really say they haven't met either.

So anyways, I guess reasons why I think this would be a good ship dynamic:

First of all, their relations with their mentors and how it's similar to each other and also not. The resulting potential for mutual support:

Han Ying's dearest wish is to be a disciple of Zhou Zishu's, as he says plainly in that one episode.

The thing is, there could be quite a lot of subtext taken from that - I've read interpretations that he's in love with Zhou Zishu, or at least has romantic feelings for him - a strong crush possibly - which I can plausibly see (I can also see it just being platonic, which I will talk about later). But yeah, a romantic interpretation just because of how strong his devotion towards Zhou Zishu is. The wistful looks?????

In that kind of situation, IF the romantic feelings are two-sided instead of one-sided - which I would like to go on the record and say that with Han Ying and Zhou Zishu, I don't believe it is - and as a result actually becomes something, that type of relationship would not be the most healthy, because there's a very strong imbalance of power. Even if the mentor figure genuinely cares and actively minds the mentee's feelings - the mentee still undeniably has that level of hero worship - it won't ever be equal. We can see that already in Han Ying's case, Zhou Zishu repeatedly tells him to stop treating him with so much formality because he's not the leader anymore and yet Han Ying still remains deferential.

In that interpretation, if that were the case of it being two sided - Han Ying would have quite a lot of similarity of experience to Xie Wang's relation to Zhao Jing -

And here I can talk about how Xie Wang and Zhao Jing's relationship is uh. Kinda sus tbh. Like. That doesn't look like a healthy or platonic father-son relationship and it gives me the creeps. In Xie Wang and Zhao Jing's relationship, I'm more inclined to believe there's some semi-incestous yifu fucking going on than anything platonic, there's just so many sus moments - and if I'm not mistaken they dubbed over a line in the show where it was basically stated plainly that it's not a platonic relationship. Or at least - Xie Wang doesn't view Zhao Jing platonically (and I don't believe Zhao Jing discourages it at all, if anything he actively encourages and guides it to make Xie Wang dependent on him). So we got another setup where it's potentially one sided romantic feelings/hero worship. Or maybe two sided for them, who knows.

But the thing is, while I talked about unhealthy romantic relationships in my section about Han Ying, a fundamental difference between Xie Wang and Han Ying's relationships with their mentors is that Zhou Zishu's relationship with Han Ying would be a lot healthier. A LOT healthier. So much fucking healthier, I cannot emphasis that enough. And that's mostly because their relationship is not two-sided, and because he sees Han Ying as a person.

He cares about Han Ying a lot but not as anything beyond platonic - he views him as a student and a subordinate and protects him as such. Han Ying on the other hand could have romantic feelings for Zhou Zishu. Not in love per se, it feels to me like it could be a mix of a really strong crush with really strong hero worship. I don't think Han Ying truly knows Zhou Zishu's other aspects of personality (yet?? I guess because if we're gonna hypothetically bring both Han Ying and Xie Wang back to life he probably will eventually get to know Zhou Zishu properly), because I doubt he ever showed anything beyond his stern assassin leader type of persona to his subordinates. He was likely caring yes, but in a way that keeps people at a distance. So, a mentor-mentee type of relationship where Han Ying could be crushing quite hard on Zhou Zishu. But still a healthy one, as Zhou Zishu, one - doesn't intend to pursue a romantic relationship with Han Ying - and moreover, although might know about his feelings, or his devotion at least(tbh you'd have to be blind not to), he treats them, and him, with respect. He doesn't try and manipulate Han Ying, or use his emotions for his own purposes. He sees Han Ying as his own person. His affection and regards towards Han Ying remains unconditional, even if Han Ying messes up or doesn't follow instructions. Instructions that, btw, repeatedly try to keep Han Ying out of the line of fire, and makes it clear that Han Ying is to put himself first.

Everything Zhao Jing does however is solely to cripple Xie Wang and make him wholly dependent on him. He's been grooming Xie Wang from such a young age, and his positive regard and care is ALWAYS conditional. As soon as Xie Wang messes up, he takes it away as punishment, and because of how Zhao Jing's made himself the center of Xie Wang's world, that action is devastating to him. He subtly encourages and toys with Xie Wang's regard for him for his own purposes, he tries to make Xie Wang jealous so he works twice as hard to earn back Zhao Jing's attention. And as we see with his intention to eventually discard Xie Wang as soon as he is no longer useful - he doesn't view Xie Wang as a person. He's merely another tool in his arsenal.

The reason why I wrote such a long ass analysis about the similarities and differences between Xie Wang and Han Ying's relationships is because as I mentioned before, one reason I think this would be a pretty interesting ship and dynamic is how these two could help each other. At first, it might be more Han Ying helping Xie Wang.

Xie Wang hasn't ever experienced what a proper and healthy guardian type relationship is like, or even what it means for someone to choose him first. He's a victim of abuse, and should he manage to survive the avalanche at the end of the show, there is potential for him to start to undo all the damage that Zhao Jing has inflicted on him all those years, especially if the man is truly no longer around. And I think Han Ying would be in a very good position to offer him support in that journey. Moreover, if Han Ying has had an experience similar to that, it could be the reason he would want to offer support to Xie Wang. He's experienced a lot of what Xie Wang has experienced, but he's also seen what it is for someone to genuinely care about him, and as a result likely has a more healthy view on that type of relationship. They're similar enough for Xie Wang to potentially not want to push Han Ying away if he ever offers his help, but also dissimilar enough that Han Ying could offer new avenues of thought.

At the same time, if you just read Han Ying and Zhou Zishu's relationship as a really strong type of hero worship, this dynamic could make sense too. Han Ying clearly looks up to Zhou Zishu quite a lot, and on top of that, Zhou Zishu in a way represents everything Han Ying has wanted and couldn't have - aka a family and a mentor figure and a home to call his own. Regardless of if it's purely platonic or not, it's still an infinitely healthier relationship, a parallel to Xie Wang's experience, so the potential of the offer of support remains the same.

Second of all, similarity in origin and life experiences, which is a small thing tbh but still an important thing:

Han Ying is someone I don't know a lot of background on tbh - I presume he doesn't have a family anymore, and somehow ended up in the Window of Heaven. I've read fics where Zhou Zishu was the one to save him at some point and offer him a position in the assassin group, and I'm inclined to take that as a plausible head canon (unless it's actually canon, idk I haven't read tyk yet).

So, in bare bones, he's an orphan who is taken in by a mentor figure, and becomes a high ranking member of an assassin group.

Xie Wang is also someone who no longer has a family - we don't know that much about his background either, but I presume he was happened upon by Zhao Jing in some way - I'm not sure at what age tbh, is it assumed that he was raised by him?? Or maybe in teenage years??

Whatever it happens to be, Xie Wang was taken in, maybe even "saved" by (although if you ask me, he'd be better off without) Zhao Jing.

So in essence it is the same thing as Han Ying's experiences, an orphan who is taken in by a mentor figure, and becomes a high ranking (or the leader of) an assassin group.

And not only that, as I mentioned from the beginning, these two both realize and know, eventually, that they’re being used by men who are desperate for power (Jin Wang, Zhao Jing).

I mention this actually as just an extension of my first point, because while I mentioned that Han Ying very obviously can support Xie Wang in that particular “past grooming and abuse” aspect, there are probably still many hidden traumas and scars for these two from the lives they’ve both lead. Their similar experiences lead to similar choices which helped shape who they are, and as a result, I think these two could truly understand each other and where they’re coming from.

Their personalities would fit pretty well with each other. I think:

I don’t know if my interpretation on how these two are is accurate tbh, so feel free to let me know if you think it’s out of character.

To me, Han Ying seems like someone who would be pretty calm around the people he cares about; responsible, smart, eager to learn, with a steady sort of presence. He seems like someone who would wear their heart on their sleeve around people he trusts too, but not in any overtly obvious way. I think the reason why I get that impression is that, upon rewatch, I could plainly see his worry about Zhou Zishu in episode one, but when I first started the show, I somehow missed it entirely. Han Ying also didn’t show any qualms about admitting to Chengling that he wants to be Zhou Zishu’s disciple - which can be a very personal piece of info. The way he was around Zhou Zishu, and Wen Kexing also gave off an air of innocent eagerness to do well in his accomplishments and for approval. I’m not saying he’s always like this, because I’m rather certain he has a darker side too - as we see with all the characters, no one is without their traumas and no one is without artifice or without complexity. They’re all grey moral in a very human way, and Han Ying is no different. We’ve seen before too that once he’s got his game face on, the man is pretty competent and also ruthless (his conversation with Gao Chong for example) - I don’t think he could be any less if he’s that high up in the Tianchuang hierarchy. But at the same time I can also see him being a bit of a very subtle disaster (almost?? Slightly dorky??) in certain situations, and we can see that kind of peek through when Zhou Zishu and Wen Kexing hijacked his kidnapping attempt and he was kind of like uhh. Okay so, I’m in a choke hold, I think that might be my former commander, so like. Let them go. It’s actually really funny cause while Wen Kexing was telling Gao Chong and Chengling to hurry up and leave, I swear you could see Han Ying contemplating his entire life.

The face of a man confuzzled.

Xie Wang on the other hand, is someone that’s more impulsive, liable to push or be mischievous, less of a steady personality and more like - for lack of better word - an absolute gremlin. A pretty murderous one. It’s a bit hard to tell all aspects of how Xie Wang is tbh, since he has many different mannerisms while talking to different people. With Zhao Jing he has a very subservient, almost dutiful, childlike and innocent air about him, and a sort of. Sa jiao (撒娇) type of demeanor. He craves approval from Zhao Jing, and is just generally very baby around him, and I’m really not sure how much of that is how he actually is and how much of that is him learning that this is the best way to get Zhao Jing’s attention. And tbh I don’t think all of that is grooming, I think Xie Wang probably does have the potential to be as soft or as innocently childlike and happy with others he cares about (just hopefully in a lot healthier way). I think we see his soft side a little with Qianqiao when he gives her the cure. Despite that though, we can still see other aspects of him surface. He makes suggestions and pushes when he thinks Zhao Jing’s refusals are unreasonable, he just goes and does his own thing sometimes (um usually murderous things. Like when he killed Song Huai Ren and told Zhao Jing he’s a traitor). He’s mischievous about some of his actions (after literally stabbing a man, ‘what? he said I should kill him if I have the ability’). He’s a lot more obviously gritty and aggressive and morally grey than Han Ying appears, which I think adds dimension to his character when added in with everything else. He’s also very smart, competent, ruthless - obviously since he runs the Scorpion, but he’s surprisingly fair and almost? Honourable? In certain aspects? And like Han Ying, he does somewhat wear his heart on his sleeve, retains that eagerness to do well and is somehow not as jaded as he could be, as he still finds the capacity to eventually care for a stranger (Liu Qianqiao). 

I may be oversimplifying how these two could be, but with their personality types I think they have a lot of potential both in a romantic relationship or as close friends. And in a way that at first glance would probably be puzzling - how in the hell did these two become friends/get together (lmao you’ll see Han Ying in his rather sensible disciple robes and then Xie Wang is just there in his braids, dramatic black outfits, winged eyeliner, etc. 🤣🤣😅😅) but on closer thought, makes sense. Han Ying could be a more steadying presence for Xie Wang, and Xie Wang in turn could help him loosen up a bit more. (That’s kind of oversimplifying it but it’s 5 am where I am rn and I’m too tired to elaborate) I also believe Xie Wang might push Han Ying to be more ambitious, be able to do things for himself more - because Xie Wang went through a process of, everything I do is for someone else, until I realized they were using me, and now I’m going to do it for myself. In that way they could potentially push each other to higher heights in what they do, and they are pretty similar in ideology and morals and previous actions. They both have blood on their hands, and they’re not afraid to be ruthless or do what’s necessary to get the job done. They have their traumas, their complexities and an understanding of what it’s like to put on masks for different people.

The potential for found family. All the found family. Gimme:

This one I feel like is more obvious and changes some things about canon, but the timeline I imagine for if Xie Wang x Han Ying would be a plausible ship is one where Han Ying survives the stealing of the fake glazed armour incident and becomes one of the disciples of Siji (second disciple of the sixth generation????). Everything else would likely proceed in a very similar way (although in this au in my mind Gu Xiang and Cao Weining are alive). And then during the avalanche incident, with WenZhou trapped in the armoury, Xie Wang ends up surviving and they end up finding him somehow.

Whether or not it’d be out of character for WenZhou to save him I think could be explored, but the bottom line is that eventually they would probably take him back to Siji. There, whether him meeting Han Ying goes smoothly or not is up to interpretation - I very much doubt it would be an amiable meeting tbh - in fact I fully imagine it to be antagonistic af at first, considering what opposing groups they used to be a part of and the knowledge of how deadly the other can be - trust would be hard to come by, which makes a slow development all the more interesting. And moreover them becoming friends or dating would likely help Xie Wang into the dynamic at Siji because now there’s a more tangible connection between him and the place, and I can see while he’s getting to know all the people of Siji, eventually thinking of them as family as well.  And Han Ying in turn gets another person who cares about him, and for him to care about.

I’ll be honest here and say that I don’t particularly care at this point how realistic or in character it all would be -  I need found family in my life I have no self control. Xie Wang and Han Ying my beloveds needs all the good things.

Another possible meeting is just Han Ying being sent to negotiate with the Scorpions instead of Duan Pengju (is that how it went? I’ll admit I’m a little fuzzy on plot points here) and meeting each other that way. There could be moments of understanding while working together, an inevitable kinda separation, and eventually seeing each other again at Siji, after all the shitshow is over. The development could continue from there.

The closer age gap:

I’d like to preface this part with a disclaimer that I’m not trying to bash any other ships that are out there, this is actually just entirely my personal preference.

I don’t really like big age gaps in my ships unless their both established adults - for example in their 30's 40's, even 50's. Even if one of them remains young in body, it’s just not a dynamic I generally like. The most popular ship that comes to mind here is Ye Baiyi x Xie Wang - and all the more power to you if you do ship it tbh, I can see it being really adorable and healing for the both of them, especially since Ye Baiyi never really gets a happy ending either (and he absolutely deserves one 😤😤😤) - but that as a ship dynamic is personally not for me, especially after Xie Wang’s kinda hinted relationship with another man that’s also older than him. Ye Baiyi obviously is ten million times the man Zhao Jing could ever be, and it would be an infinitely healthier relationship anyway, but yeah the age gap thing is just my personal bias.

So I don’t know, I appreciate that Han Ying and Xie Wang are both closer in age to each other. I know there aren’t confirmed ages (I think?) but if I had to take a guess, I’d say I think both of them are probably in their early to mid twenties.

Anyways, it’s literally 5:43 am now where I am, so I think I’m gonna end this way too long post and pass out. Honestly, I’m not even sure if this thing is coherent anymore, I’m half delirious with exhaustion while writing this. I might possibly write a fic or do something about this Xie Wang x Han Ying ship, I might not, but I just wanted to get it out there. It’s a cute idea.

Oh god my eyeballs are burning. Cheers, goodnight.

[sixteenthshen]

Episode 1 Notes/Meta

Contains minor spoilers up to Youtube's schedule and references to the novel

Since I don’t have any new episodes to watch until Friday, I decided to watch the drama all over again, very closely, to see if there’s anything new to discover.

Zhou Zishu's character: 

Drama immediately sets the backdrop/tells us why his character is kinder, more compassionate than in the novel. We don't know that drama!ZZS is kinder yet at this time, but we can see that he's schemey and sneaky

He wears a mask of indifference as the Window of Heaven's leader (sorry ZZH, I was wrong. I thought your acting was stiff during one scene, but now I know better). It's one of the many subtle faces of ZZS.

Wen Kexing's character:

He must be a highly-skilled martial artist based on how easily he kills two ghosts and that he can spot another skilled martial artist from a distance (beggar Zhou)

He's quite schemey. First, when he orders all his subordinates out to hunt for a man he just killed. Next, when he lets Gu Xiang go to check on the beggar, he's also subtly using her to test that unknown person's martial arts skills.

Why they're soulmates:

WKX understood immediately what "beggar" Zhou was doing (suntanning)

They're both well-matched schemey bastards

Behind the cut, geographical details and some details about the supporting characters. This is a very text-heavy post FYI

In chronological order:

20 years ago, Rong Xuan was killed by the Five Lakes Alliance and the gathered heroes.

Prince Jin is based far away in the North (Hedong 河东), where he holds power. It implies most of the story later takes place closer to the south of China.

Prince Jin ordered the Window of Heaven (TC in short, for Tian Chuang) to assassinate the Military Governor of Zhenwu (Officer Li). The Zhenwu Army is located somewhere around Inner Mongolia today.

Prince Jin falsely claims the Military Governor is a traitor to the country and has him assassinated. Prince Jin harbours treasonous thoughts, and in turn, makes ZZS and TC traitors.

Officer Li recognized Zhou Zishu by sight (calls him Officer Zhou), which means that they must have met previously somehow. He is shocked to know that ZZS is the leader of TC, so TC must be a secret assassin/spy organization (like an ancient CIA)

Zhou Zishu gets a drop of blood on his sword and flicks it off – he does not like blood.

Princess Jing An knows ZZS and first calls him Zhou shixiong (her first instinct is to use a familiar address). She later changes it to Officer Zhou when she realizes what he did.

Princess Jing An quotes, "The flowers blossom in all four seasons, knowing everything in the world", which makes ZZS turn to look at her - he sees the hairpin that his shidi Qin Jiuxiao made for the one he loves. ZZS gets super sad.

This line of poetry refers to the Four Seasons Manor (ZZS's martial arts sect)

ZZS, during his time as a court official, intentionally has a blank mask, so his emo is seen only in his slightly teary eyes.  Removing this mask is also part of the freedom he seeks. Possibly symbolic that he feels freer living behind a physical mask than he does with his face.

Prince Jin ordered ZZS to personally nail the seven nails into Bi Chang Feng (Uncle Bi). It seems somewhat cruel of the Prince. ZZS walks with 2 of his commanders – Duan Pengju and Han Ying.

Uncle Bi calls ZZS Manor Lord (庄主)*. He says he cannot help but suspect the motives of Prince Jin. ZZS shows a slight reaction to this. He knows the motivations of Prince Jin by now. Not only is he a traitor himself, but he dragged all his 81 men down with him.

This is the root cause of ZZS's different personality traits in the drama and novel. I think his character in both the book and drama adaption is similar, but his additional compassion stems from being placed in different circumstances.

Novel!ZZS did terrible things for the right reasons. As a result, he won't feel as guilty and has less reason to be so compassionate.

Drama!ZZS followed the wrong master, and the awful things he did were for treasonous reasons. There's no justification for the lives he took. Because he did worse things, he's better able to "see the light" and understand things in life better. Therefore, kinder.

The motto of the Window of Heaven (as requested by Prince Jin):

The members are to carry out their missions without leaving a trace (shadow without traces)

Once a person enters TC, they're never to leave (entry without exit.)

To know everything and to be everywhere.

When the camera cuts to ZZS's two senior officers, Han Ying shuts his eyes sadly while Duan Pengju has a slight smile on his face 🤨🤨.

Nails of Seven Torments (七窍三秋钉) – seven nails, each to be driven into the seven primary acupoints (for martial arts) in a person's body. After that, a person won't get to see more than three autumns. They would lose their martial arts ability entirely, and their five senses deteriorate over time, preventing the secrets of TC from being leaked. (see #2 of their motto)

ZZS does not like anyone who's not from his sect to call him Manor Lord, as it's a reminder of his failings. He doesn't think he has the right to be called that any longer since he ruined his sect.

Prince Jin calls ZZS by his name directly (Zishu); it implies a certain level of familiarity. However, ZZS hasn't been presented himself in front of Prince Jin in some time, suggesting he has already distanced himself from Prince Jin (and a certain level of disrespect)

From Duan Pengju, we learn that ZZS hadn't taken up his sword much in the past year due to a lingering injury; this time at the Military Governor's residence was the first time he wielded his sword in a while.

DPJ also uses this word again (又) in Chinese to describe ZZS aggravating his injuries again (that isn't in the YT subs), which implies that he has suffered other internal injuries before, not solely from QJX's death. DPJ is subtly suggesting to Prince Jin that ZZS is no longer very fit and not suitable for his role (shows us his ambition).

ZZS's current injury (that Uncle Bi refers to and why he coughed up blood in the snow) came about after Qin Jiuxiao's (shidi) death. He coughed up blood then and fainted.**

ZZS's residence is called Chongming Garden (重明苑), where he has a mural of 82 white flowers and the line of poetry about the Four Seasons Manor. He paints each flower red when one of his original sect members pass away. There's only one white flower left --- himself.  See this link for a more detailed translation.

ZZS scolds a vision of his shidi not to cry. ZZS's assertion that men shouldn't cry comes up several times later. His eyes only get teary after this scene, and not a single tear falls again (still canon for now).

ZZS has an official court position. He's an Imperial Guard with some seniority, and it's likely why the Military Governor calls him Officer Li. (A governor would not call a low ranked Imperial Guard “Officer” 大人 daren)

ZZS has several battle wounds from a blade, but the ones on his back (shoulder blades) look messy. Not sure what they are yet, but I think it could become relevant later.

Prince Jin appears unstable when he talks about everyone leaving him. Yunxing and Beiyuan are both characters from Lord Seventh. Beiyuan is the titular character of that novel. When Prince Jin said, "Beiyuan is gone too", ZZS displays a minute reaction because he knows Beiyuan isn't actually dead.

Prince Jin says ZZS is ruthless, but he's even more so to himself (recurring description).

Here, we see that ZZS knows of DPJ's ambition to take over his job when he says they both get their wishes today. DPJ becomes the new TC leader.

Prince Jin lets ZZS go. As he watches ZZS leave, he recites two lines from a poem, which title roughly translates to "on one's deathbed/imminent death".***

“涓涓江汉流，天窗通冥室。谗邪害公正，浮云翳白日。” Small streams can become large rivers; even a window as small as a skylight can brighten a dark room. Rumours and evil can harm the public good; clouds can block the bright light of the sun.

There's some foreshadowing here. Prince Jin sees ZZS leaving as a threat. It could be that one person leaving TC "standing" may lead to an exodus or that ZZS knows too much to be left alive outside for long. Prince Jin sees himself as the righteous and the sun here. He follows the recital by saying he's only letting ZZS go for now.

ZZS's beggar styling is supposed to juxtapose his strict and neat dress as the leader of TC, including his hair and overall CBAssed-ness of how his clothes hang.

Hanged ghost died super quick. We see an arm covered in a red sleeve strangle him to death. Red sleeve dude seems to be the head of the Ghost Valley (yaaaaa we know who you are)

WKX lies to the masses about the Hanged Ghost and tells them to set forth out of the Ghost Valley. We can see that all of them are scared of him. He has a scheme -- but we don’t know what it is yet.

WKX and ZZS meet (yay!!!) in Yue (modern-day Zhejiang, in the south), far away from Prince Jin. We should note that this is very far away from the North, where Prince Jin and TC hold power.

ZZS would rather be a beggar than the Emperor. The freedom to live and do whatever he chooses is more important to him than riches or power.

WKX understood what ZZS was doing right away (while GX thinks he's a beggar). This is why they're soulmates!

Gu Xiang's cuteness comes off as a little forced here, but upon re-watching, I believe it's because she hasn't been out in the "human world" before. Her mannerisms are all learned from her life in the Ghost Valley. She's also about ten years younger than WKX, so she's supposed to be more energetic.

WKX allows GX to go down partly because he is curious about the beggar, who seems to be very skilled at martial arts. GX is quite a straightforward and innocent person. She's unaware that she's helping to test the beggar's skills for her master.

WKX notices the ZZS's martial arts and stands up right away. This scene is also more important than it seems to be at first. Later in episode 2, it's revealed that he recognized the beggar's particular martial arts as unique to the Four Seasons Manor sect. I think it's the first hint that beggar Zhou may be "Zhou Zishu". (We find out that WKX knows ZZS's real name in episode 6.)

ZZS intentionally hits himself to make himself seem like a poor injured beggar and GX a bully. It shows that ZZS is sneaky – and again, ruthless, even to himself.

* ZZS is not a real lord. He's the sect leader (Manor Lord comes about because his sect's name ends in Manor, and the address "my lord" comes from Manor Lord). ** This is a fictional type of injury, where people in Chinese historical dramas cough up blood when they suffer severe emotional shocks that cause some unexplained internal injury. *** 《临终诗》

[lillotte17]

Tomorrow

Got hooked watching Word of Honor and Zhou Zishu's Sad Face Journeys in episodes 33-34 came for my life, so I wrote a little scene set after the whole Heroes Conference Thing. ...And then Wen KeXing showed up and just...*gestures vaguely* I don't know what happened here. XD

~

Zhou Zishu sits quietly beside the bed, watching Wen KeXing's sleeping face with an ache in his chest that has nothing to do with his failing body, and everything to do with the fact that he is about to die.

When his shidi had made a miraculous reappearance at the Heroes Conference, his first reaction was gut-wrenching surprise. It felt as though the ground had suddenly dissolved beneath his feet. His heart leaping so high in his throat that he forgot how to breathe. Dizzy with the overwhelming rush of joy and confusion. Uncertain whether to laugh or cry.

But once the shock had subsided, the anger had been hot on its heels. And he wanted to be mad about it. Wanted to take Wen KeXing by the shoulders and shake him so hard that his teeth rattled around in his skull. Wanted to scream and sob and rail against the now inevitably fast-burning candle of his fate. At the unfairness of losing his life just as he had found something worth living for again. Someoneworth living for. For a few moments, the fury had burned so brightly in him he thought it might be enough to kill him then and there. That the fire between his lungs would simply burst his chest open and engulf everything around them in a sea of red.

But when they had caught each other’s gaze, he had seen the apology roiling in Wen KeXing’s dark eyes, raw and miserable, even without a word being said. The apology, and the fear. That same fear Zishu had seen flicker across his face every time he had tried to coax him into confessing that he was from Ghost Valley. The same fear he had seen in him the night Wen KeXing had snuck out of the Four Seasons Manor to intercept Ye BaiYi and tried to prevent him from reveling his identity. And yet again, when Han Ying had died, and he had nearly killed himself in a blind panic trying to fix it somehow. The fear whispered that death was preferable to his hatred. That his blade would be kinder than his revulsion. That Wen KeXing would sacrifice anything to avoid being abandoned once again.

Zhou Zishu was helpless in the face of it; as he always seems to be. The look that passed between them had been fast and fleeting, there and gone again with barely a blink, but it was enough to douse the flames of his anger with a tide of chilling and fathomless grief. The rest of the Heroes Conference passed before him in a daze. Vengeance, and justice, and pride. Wen KeXing blazing in the brightest and truest version of himself for all to see. Dazzling and mesmerizing and impossible to look away from. He does not know if he has ever loved him more, even as he felt his heart slowly sinking down into the pit of his stomach. The numbness of acceptance settling into his bones.

There will be no escape from death, this time.

He had been quiet on the way back to Jing BeiYuan’s Manor. Quiet enough to worry both Wen KeXing and ChengLing, who always seems to see more than he understands. He had listened to their reasons and excuses, and he had done his best to reassure them afterwards, but his own words sound hollow in his ears. The best he could do was to get Lao Wen hopelessly drunk, and pray that it made him less intuitive. The suffusion of elation and hope in the air had nearly been enough to choke him, though. He did not want to rob them of it, but he found he could take part in it either, no matter how much he wanted to. He could not bring himself to celebrate a future he can no longer share with them.

Zhou Zishu understands Wen KeXing. He understands that he is just as abysmal at properly conveying affection as he is himself, if not more so. The man only knows how to protect people he cares for by either sending them away from him or drowning them both in blood. It is how he had managed to survive all those years surrounded by madness and chaos and death. Zishu had done much the same, while he was working in the capital. Hiding all of their softer places far away from where the light could reach them. Playful banter has always passed easily between them, but tenderness is heavier, and vulnerabilities almost impossible to speak aloud. They are both trying to do better, struggling to pull their own humanity back into their hands where it can be shared freely, but Wen KeXing’s hurts are older and deeper. His path back to the world of the living inevitably more winding and complex. He still has not mastered the art of articulating his fears and concerns.

Zhou Zishu’s health was tenuous even before he had been kidnapped and tortured. As much as he hated to admit it, he had been in no fit state to fight an angry mob. Wen KeXing hid the truth from him because he knew that he would chafe at being told to stay out of harm’s way; that they would have argued about it until he was either allowed to participate in the scheme or he was spitting blood and passing out on the floor. Zishu cannot even say that this assessment of his character was a bad one, but it still stung to be kept in the dark, and the hurt was lingering. And yet, however deep the barb of this secret may have landed, however misplaced the caution may or may not have been, he knows without a shred of doubt that Wen KeXing’s deception was born of love, and he can hardly hold that against him.

Especially not now.

Wen KeXing turns his head slightly, mumbling something that sounds suspiciously like an extremely slurred version of his name. His expression is smooth and peaceful, his hair a dark fan across the bed behind him. The rosy glow of happiness and alcohol still pinking the apples of his cheeks.

Zishu smiles despite himself. It is much easier to find traces of the little boy his master had planned to take for his second disciple when he looks like this; safe and sleeping and completely at ease for the first time in who knows how long. He wishes he could recall those few precious days they had spent together as children with more clarity, but the memory of it is like a silk brocade left to sit too long in the sunshine, its delicate patterns fading as the colors wash away in a flood of light. Zhou Zishu had been too young to fully comprehend the weight of death when his master had returned from his trip to collect the Wen family without his shidi or his parents in tow. That his master had been sad about it was enough to impact him, but in the grand scheme of things, the wounds to his own heart had been minimal.

What would have happened if they had kept looking for Zhen Yan, he wonders. If he and Wen KeXing had grown up together as best friends and martial brothers and soulmates? Would their master have found a way to soothe Zhen Yan’s rage before it consumed him? Would Zhou Zishu have made the same mistakes with the Window of Heaven if Wen KeXing had been at his side? Perhaps they could have saved each other before things had reached the place they were now. Or perhaps Wen KeXing would have died under Zhou Zishu’s leadership with the rest of their sect, and his failures would have tasted that much more bitter.

He sighs quietly. There is no sense dwelling on things he cannot change. He had been a child, and just as powerless to save Wen KeXing from his fate as the boy himself had been. Feeling guilty about it was meaningless at this point. It was enough to have him here and now. Enough that they had had any time together at all. Enough that Wen KeXing had fallen off of that cliff and somehow still managed to walk back to him.

It has to be enough, because it is all they have. All they can have. Even if he wants more.

“Ah Xu?”

The voice is thick with sleep, but marginally less inebriated than before.

“Mn,” Zhou Zishu hums in acknowledgement, his gaze shifting slightly to watch Wen KeXing blink himself back into wakefulness.

“You didn’t go to bed?” he asks, bleary and swaying slightly as he attempts to sit up.

“There is someone in my bed.” Zishu points out archly.

Wen KeXing looks murderous for a few seconds until he realizes that the person in question is, in fact, himself. When the clouds break, his expression immediately shifts to one of insufferable satisfaction. He leans precariously off the side of the bed, robes and hair both hopelessly askew.

“I am always willing to share everything I have with Ah Xu,” he declares with feigned sweetness.

“How kind of Philanthropist Wen to make a present of what he stole from me,” Zhou Zishu snorts, “Your generosity knows no bounds.”

“Ah Xu!” Wen KeXing objects. “How is it stealing when you gave it to me freely? You think I would come to your bedroom with the intention of sleeping?”

“I’m sure I don’t know anything about your intentions.” The reply is given with a smirk, but his eyes dart away from him. “You asked me to drink with you, but the jar you brought was empty. Besides, I am thinking about giving it up. I have been told that it is bad for my health.”

“Aiya, first Ah Xu accuses me of being a thief, and now he tells me such scandalous falsehoods!” Wen KeXing shakes his head, attempting to seem wounded despite the grin on his face. “I already accepted your punishment earlier, there is no reason to be cruel.”

“Who is a liar here?” Zhou Zishu inquires laughingly, gesturing back and forth between them. “Which one of us is the most scandalous?”

“It’s me, it’s me,” Wen KeXing acknowledges, his head bobbing up and down in agreement, “But Ah Xu, you cannot expect me to ever believe that you would willingly give up drinking good wine with me? And as for not understanding my intentions, well…I believe that even less.”

“Was your intention to make sure I could not get any sleep?”

Wen KeXing only smiles at him widely.

“…I regret asking such a question,” Zhou Zishu chuckles, reaching out to lightly slap the side of Wen KeXing’s face in both fondness and chastisement. “Ask a shameless man a question and you are sure to get a shameless reply.”

Wen KeXing grabs hold of his hand before he can pull it away, leaning into it with a sigh.

“What is so shameless about it at this point?” he wonders, something soft and shining igniting within his gaze. “Living together. Dying together. Watching as our hair turns gray with old age. We’ve already promised to share these things, haven’t we? Why give me your bed when we could share that, too?”

Zhou Zishu takes a long look at him. At the dark hair spilling across his shoulder in disarray. The front of his robes just rumpled enough to expose the elegant line of his throat as well as part of his collar bones. The flush of his cheeks and the promise burning in his eyes.

He cannot deny that he wants it. Even knowing it might make things more painful later on. He wants to be selfish. He wants to be greedy while he still can. While he can still hear Lao Wen calling for him and feel his skin beneath his hands. His sense of taste and smell have gone already, but can still see him, and that could be enough. More than enough.

But will it be enough for Wen KeXing?

This is the last thing they have to give each other. The last pieces of themselves they have been holding back. Mostly because there simply had not been time for it amidst the chaos swirling around them. It always seemed as though either their lives were in danger or one of them was injured. Up until now, even Zishu had been optimistic enough to assume they would have time for it later, though. Time to use physical intimacy as an almost second meeting. To learn how they need each other in the quiet and the dark. To learn the ways they can be gentle, and the ways they can be fierce. To burn each other up in desperation and desire.

It seems too heartless to have it be a farewell instead.

Zhou Zishu lets out a long breath.

“…Not when you are drunk,” he says quietly.

Wen KeXing blinks at him in astonishment, eyes blown wide and round as saucers, clearly expecting a flat-out rejection.

A moment later, the blankets have been hastily flung aside, and he is staggering off of the bed has fast as he can. Which, as it turns out, is not very fast at all. Zhou Zishu easily catches him with one arm, lightly pushing him back into a seated position.

“Lao Wen, where do you think you are going?” he laughs.

“I need to sober up,” Wen KeXing explains, looking so serious about it that Zhou Zishu cannot help but reach out and pinch his cheek. Lao Wen slaps his hand away, his expression mulish.

“Don’t pout,” Zishu scolds, still chuckling, “It is too late to be staggering around someone else’s house. With my luck, you would drown yourself in the fish pond, and then BeiYuan and Wu Xi would be terribly put out.”

“But Ah Xu, if you won’t let me leave, and you won’t share the bed, just what do you want me to do?” Lao Wen complains. “Even if you don’t want to have sex, you should at least lay down and rest properly. I want you to get well as soon as possible.”

Zhou Zishu’s mouth stiffens slightly.

“I know.”

Wen KeXing’s brow furrows in concern. He reaches out a hand, long fingers hovering just above his heart, when Zhou Zishu catches them tightly in his own. He is not certain if Lao Wen could glean the truth about his condition from his pulse while still tipsy, but he is not about to run that risk tonight.

“Are the nails bothering you again?” Wen KeXing asks, doleful this time.

“No.”

It is not a lie.

“Then come to bed,” Lao Wen cajoles, using their joined hands to tug him closer, “I promise not to molest you unless you ask me to.”

Zhou Zishu makes a sound of grumbling disbelief, but still allows himself to be pulled down next to Wen KeXing. The bed is big enough for two, but only just. Lao Wen retrieves the formerly discarded blankets from whatever corner he had toss them and bundles them up together like two caterpillars in a single cocoon. His face is close beside him on the pillow, warm breath fanning the side of his neck. An arm drapes loosely about Zishu’s waist, and he turns his head slightly, intending to shoot a warning glare in the other man’s direction.

This is a mistake.

Wen KeXing’s eyes are dark and intense in the moonlight, half closed with either sleep or desire, it is hard to say. His lips part slightly as Zhou Zishu turns to him, and the hand draped around his waist clutches faintly at his robes as if on instinct. Both of them seem to have forgotten how to breathe.

“…Ah Xu, you can kiss me, if you like,” Lao Wen whispers finally, so soft it almost seems like a dream.

“What makes you think I want to kiss you?” he means it to sound teasing, but it comes out in almost a sigh.

“Because I want to kiss you,” Lao Wen replies matter-of-factly.

“I never thought of you as a pillar of self-restraint,” Zhou Zishu huffs.

“I promised to be a gentleman.”

Zishu closes his eyes and lets out a deep, soul-rattling sigh. He is almost glad he cannot smell the oils Wen KeXing uses in his hair or the trace of alcohol on his lips. The proximity is staggering enough all on its own.

“…It would not stop with a kiss,” he admits aloud to both of them.

He does not open his eyes again, but he can feel Wen KeXing’s body tremble slightly as he laughs, and that is almost as bad.

“Ah Xu, I would hardly complain,” he replies, testing his luck by shifting close enough so that their foreheads are lightly touching. “But you want to rest, and I want you rested, so it is no great loss, either way. You will still be here with me tomorrow, after all. There is no need to rush these things. Sometimes, a slow spring is sweeter.”

“Yes,” Zhou Zishu manages to reply around the lump lodged in his throat, “I will still be here tomorrow.”

[aiyexayen]

🧍5, 14, 17, 23, 26, 32, 43, 45, 46!!!!!!!

OH MY GOD I NEVER FINISHED THIS EVEN AFTER I GOT YOUR ANSWER ABOUT WHICH [INSERT FIC] YOU WANTED. this was like months ago lmfao i just found it in my drafts. whoops.

5. What do you wish someone would ask you about [insert fic] (Sex Pest)? Answer it now! i can't say i have a specific question i wish people would ask about that one. maybe "how many of zishu's disciples DID drag off their newest shixiong once he was released from the infirmary, and is that who i think it is??" to which i could say "yes😌 it's han ying, and he went off with no less than four of his shidis. he deserves all the love. gentle, worshipful love from his boyfriends who thought he wasn't going to make it. celebratory, joyous love from his boyfriends who are all finally living their dreams at siji shanzhuang with him. they're having a great time tbh."

14. Are there any tropes you would only read if written by a trusted friend or writer? yes. perhaps obviously, squicks or potential triggers. but also there's a lot of typical tropes or set-ups or even ships that i've given up on finding my particular flavour in for new writers. one of the primary things that comes to mind is actually the whole category of 'getting together' tropes. there was only one bed, fake dating, they were roommates, etc. i'll really only read that kind of story if it's from a friend, trusted writer, or there's something else about the story premise that really hooks me in spite of the trope tag. or if it's a subverted trope in some way. i can like it but i'm ~picky~

17. What highly specific AU do you want to read or write even though you might be the only person to appreciate it? i always have a number of extremely specific crossover au's that i'd like to see or write that i think might just be for me. but just like my obscure shl polyships zhou zishu/liu qianqiao/han ying and a-xiang/cao weining/xie'er, i may be surprised and find other people are actually super into it too. like, for current gaming-news-related reasons, my brain's been on a kick of "what if legend of zelda: breath of the wild, but link stumbles upon siji shanzhuang."

23. What’s a trope, AU, or concept you’ve never written, but would like to? so many. uh. i would really like to write a coffee shop au someday just so i can say i have. i'd also really like to write a full longform "what if they swapped fates" au for either cql or shl. i.e. what if lan wangji lost his core and went to the burial mounds and then died for 16 years and wei ying did not do that. or what if wen kexing grew up in siji shanzhuang and headed tianchuang and zhou zishu became gui gu guzhu. that sort of thing.

26. Would you rather write a fic that had no dialogue or one that was only dialogue? i'm a lot better at writing fics that have no dialogue; i have already written ficlets with no dialogue, mostly character study snippets. it might be a fun challenge to write an only-dialogue fic. i can't imagine i could make a very long one, though. if someone prompts me for one someday i'll definitely try it.

32. What’s your ideal fic length to read? depends on my mood and the hook, but i usually like fics in the 1k-15k range best i think? i do like to popcorn-read small ficlets in collections or series or if someone's done a challenge, though. and i also like to find a really nice premise and settle down for a longhaul fic now and again.

43. If you take/write prompts: what’s your favorite prompt fic that you’ve written? i do take prompts. i love prompts. (everyone please send me prompts). there's absolutely no way i could pick a favourite prompt i've gotten or fic i've written to a prompt. even if i eliminated things like prompt week challenges i've decided to participate in or sign-ups for events and i just limited it to, like, prompts sent via tumblr ask, i still couldn't pick a favourite. i've gotten too many good ones.

45. What’s something you’ve improved on since you started writing fic? probably everything. i wrote my first fic when i was quite young lmfao. uh. in recent years specifically think my dialogue's gotten better. i think i've gotten better at incorporating sensory details and visual details among the internal thoughts.

46. Do you prefer writing on your phone or on a computer (or something else)? Do you think where you write affects the way you write? i vastly prefer writing on the computer. i type pretty fast and i can get in a flow a lot better when i can actually get my brain to focus. i also feel less claustrophobic about it, i think is the word i want--like the process of writing, to me, involves a lot of trying out strings of words and then backspacing them all and trying again, or switching a few words around in the middle, and then rereading and realising it all belongs two paragraphs earlier, and then reading back through those two paragraphs after the transplant for flow before i can get my brain to move onto the true next sentence and inevitably finding a word i want to change...etc. and doing that on a phone is super difficult and the clicking on and off the touch keyboard and the screen bouncing around and losing track of things more than four lines back at a time and not being able to see the paragraph shapes at least half a page at a time just makes me feel absolutely feral. boxed in. i used to just try to power through it when i had a less functional computer setup but now i'll only write on my phone anymore in a pinch or if it's a really small blurb. for similar reasons i really struggle to write anything by hand. the first time i want to move something around and can't? i can't even look at the page anymore unless i rewrite it all out perfectly on a new page each time and very quickly into the process i just want to burn the whole notebook and end up crying instead. (i'm completely neurotypical idk what you're talking about)

anyway that was probably more information than you cared to know but you did ask sjdlfjskdfk

[fishylife]

Thoughts up to Nothing Gold Can Stay Ep 51

- Is it bad that I don’t want Zhou Ying and Shen Xingyi to get married? It isn’t that I don’t want Zhou Ying to find new love. It’s just that Xingyi has been extremely persistent about pursuing a woman who has rejected him multiple times and I’d hate for the message to be “persistence always wins when pursuing a woman.” I know that Xingyi has grown a lot since the beginning of the show, and Zhou Ying legitimately doesn’t hate him anymore. But currently, Xingyi has still shown that he can’t take no for an answer, even though he and his family had backed Zhou Ying into a corner. He’s still sending letters against everybody’s wishes but his own. His family doesn’t want him going after the widow of their supposed enemies, the entire Wu family don’t like that he’s trying to poach her away, and Zhou Ying was troubled because the Wu family didn’t like him. The only person who has outwardly expressed wanting them to get together was Zhou Laosi, who enabled Shen Xingyi’s romcom male lead behaviour to begin with >.> Shen Xingyi has “joked” about Zhou Ying being his or being his maid, etc. And frankly I don’t really find it endearing because it’s a reference to how their relationship started, which at best was messy and at worst was traumatic.

- Most people in Zhou Ying’s life have encouraged her to move on (most of them hinting towards Shen Xingyi). Zhou Laosi, Chunxing, Qianhong, and even her mother-in-law have okayed her moving ahead and finding someone else. I think the biggest one here was her mother-in-law. If Zhou Ying married someone else, she would no longer be the daughter-in-law of the Wu household. However, now that her mother-in-law says she treats her like a daughter, I guess that’s supposed to tie her to the Wu family not through marriage but as a kind of daughter. Honestly, this feels like a plot device that allows her to marry someone else, but still remain part of the Wu family :/

- I have seen a spoiler about this show and I’m kind of hoping that it supports my hope that they won’t get married. I’m all for Shen Xingyi becoming a better man, I just don’t want him to marry Zhou Ying. I think him understanding that he can’t always have what he wants would be a good lesson in him learning to be a better man, rather than wanting to be a better man just so that Zhou Ying would have him.

- Earlier in the series, there was a part when Zhou Ying was leaving Zhao Baishi’s office after a short conversation and he was like “you’re leaving already?” That moment gave me vibes that Zhao Baishi had romantic feelings for Zhou Ying, but I chose to ignore them at the time. But when Zhou Ying swore that she would never take another husband, he was clearly in anguish and I was like “...really?” I was a little annoyed because I admired Zhao Baishi for his no-nonsense attitude and now I’m thinking back and wondering if he’d ever shown bias.

- So yeah, as you can see, I’m not loving the romantic story lines here. This show is from 2017 so I’m not sure if it counts as an “older” show, but I would consider having many different characters interested in the main character (Wu Pin, Shen Xingyi, Tu’erdan, Zhao Baishi) as Mary Sue behaviour. I don’t consider Zhou Ying the worst Mary Sue, but this is one of the Mary Sue attributes of this show. Earlier in the show, I had also suspected Wang Shijun of having a crush on Zhou Ying, but at this point, I’m going to very cautiously assume that he’s just loyal to her and sees her as a friend.

- I just think that the story could have been awesome if we showed that Zhou Ying could have deep friendship with other men. She has very different relationships with Wu Pin, Shen Xingyi, Tu’erdan, and Zhao Baishi, and the fact that all of them have a romantic angle is just so eye-rolly to me. Men can like Zhou Ying without wanting to marry her!!!

- The only non-familial male relationships that are explored somewhat are those between Zhou Ying and Wang Shijun and Jiang Fuqi, and they too are extremely loyal to Zhou Ying. For Wang Shijun, I guess you could chalk it up to her not punishing him when he’d lied about her because his mother was in danger. I mean, I like Wang Shijun, I’m just saying that he’s one of the many men who are unfailingly loyal to her. As for Jiang Fuqi, when he first agreed to work for Zhou Ying, he said that he’d even work for no money and I was like !!!! don’t agree to be an unpaid intern!!!! I don’t have as big of a problem with Wang Shijun and Jiang Fuqi’s loyalty to her because at least they see that she’s a good boss and they trust her on the basis of that. (But if Wang Shijun shows any romantic interest in Zhou Ying I’m going to flip the goddamn table)

- At first, I didn’t want to call Zhou Ying a Mary Sue, but now that I’m stepping back and thinking about it, there are some parts of the story that are a little off, and are a little too idealistic. Don’t get me wrong, I’m enjoying the story a LOT, but Zhou Ying’s character is a little too idealistic. A lot of the people around her praise her for her kindness and trustworthiness, etc. which feels a little forced because Zhou Ying’s actions can definitely speak for themselves.

- Just wanted to talk about Er Shu (second uncle). He’s a pretty calm and confident character. He’s also the person in the Wu family with the biggest sway. When he supports Zhou Ying, then everybody’s happy, and when he doesn’t support Zhou Ying, it’s the end of the world. I’m just thinking out loud here, but despite his character being relatively calm and willing to analyze, I can’t help but feel that his words and actions are dramatized a bit in the story. When he pulls out his support from Zhou Ying’s business ventures, he’s portrayed like a villain. And then when he supports Zhou Ying, he’ll support her so wholeheartedly that he’ll make a decision on behalf of Si Shu as well. I don’t think it’s out of character for Er Shu to change his mind based on new information, but I just think the story could do with toning his character down a bit. It’s just hard for me to think of him as wise when he changes his mind so dramatically.

- I’m really enjoying the drama, I just wanted to point out some of the flaws that have been bugging me so far. I haven’t binged a show this hard in a long time.

[minmotl]

Ch. 69: Sui Zhou Touches Tang Fan’s Lips As They Sleep On The Same Bed

Context: Continues from Chapter 68. Tang Fan, Sui Zhou and the other men are headed back to the Imperial City and Tang Fan knows that his punishment for letting Yin Yuan Hua get killed will be severe. Sui Zhou tries to help him but is helpless to do so, and Tang Fan plans for him instead, touching and warming the man’s heart.

*Note: Liang Wen Hua is Yin Yuan Hua’s direct supervisor and the both of them have been trying to sabotage Tang Fan for the longest time. 

Introduction Post | Masterpost

—

Highlights under the cut

Tang Fan smiles slightly, and then finds a chair next to the bed to sit down on. The red swelling on his face has already faded, so this action naturally looks elegant.

“What do you think will happen?” he asks in return, wanting to hear his good friend’s thoughts.

Sui Zhou is highly skilled in martial arts and has a firm, strong body, so even after sustaining severe injuries, now that he has laid down for so many days he is more or less recovered. Now, as he sits leaning against the side of the wall and chats with his good friend, this is instead another type of rest.

Listening to Tang Fan’s words, he then says sombrely, “A lot of people already think that you are in the Zhang Ying’s camp, but from what I can see, Wan An has been wanting to switch him out and so he definitely won’t sit in the ministerial position for long. Once he leaves, you’ll have to face Liang Wen Hua on your own, but in today’s court there are a few different parties that are competing fiercely with each other. Although Liang Wen Hua and the Chief Minister Wan An are close, but Liu Xu and Liu Ji do not look upon Wan An favourably, you still have a chance.”

The bunch of them have stayed in Gong County for a month, and at this point, Sui Zhou still does not know that Zhang Ying has been assigned to Nanjing, and also has no idea how accurate his premonition is.

“So what you mean is, I should depend on Liu Xu or Liu Ji?” Tang Fan asks.

Sui Zhou nods, “In the internal courts, today’s leading three elders, aside from Wan An, are Liu Xu and Liu Ji, these two men. Liu Xu is righteous and blunt, while Liu Ji is used to patronising others, and they are certainly no easy people to get along with. However, Liu Xu is the Emperor’s teacher and even he has to address the man as Dong Liu-xiansheng. The respect he has for the man is apparent. As for Liu Xu himself, he can appreciate capable young officials, so if you can gain his protection, you will not need to be afraid of Liang Wen Hua.”

And within the internal courts, although Liu Xu tends to be arrogant, compared to others, his personality can be considered one of the better ones. Moreover, he often advises the Emperor to work hard and serve his people. The only thing is, Liu Xu has a bad temper and likes to lecture others. If he sees someone he does not like, no matter if that person has done something good or bad, he will still lecture them from a higher moral ground. This has garnered the resentment of others, and so his relationship with others in court is not good. He tends to spread rumours to the disadvantage of others, which is why he, Wan An and Liu Ji are discussed together in the same sitting.

***

Tang Fan only laughs bitterly at his words, “This is a good solution, but on me, this doesn’t really work.”

Sui Zhou frowns, “Why?”

“My teacher and Liu Xu hold old grudges against each other, detesting one another. They cannot resist but want to triumph over the other. With Liu Xu’s character, do you think it’s possible for him to protect his enemy’s student?”

“There is deep enmity between them?” Sui Zhou asks.

Tang Fan, “Not quite to that extent, but you are also well aware that the both of them have bad tempers and believe in that they know best. You know this, it is easy to determine who the winner is in a physical fight, but between scholars, it is challenging to see who wins. I am not certain how their conflict came to be, but in any case, I once saw my teacher throw water from a cup at Liu Xu with my own eyes, and he said that Liu Xu is just as this water, that he is dirty and hard to deal with.”

Sui Zhou, “…”

Well, since they have already come to blows, it is probably impossible for them to become friends in this lifetime. And Tang Fan, as Qiu Jun’s student, if he approached the man, judging by Liu Xu’s personality, it is not difficult to imagine how Tang Fan will be humiliated as a result.

This method indeed will not work. When he thinks about this, Sui Zhou too is a little helpless.

He is the zhenfushi in charge of the Northern Administrative Court, and although the official hat he wears on the top of his head is Rank Five qianhu only, the rank he has when compared to civil officials of the same rank is very different. Not only do Rank Five civil officials need to give way to him, even the seasoned elders in the internal court will have to stop and exchange greetings with him when they see Sui-zhenfushi.

Moreover, he is also related to Empress Dowager Zhou, while the Emperor trusts him immensely. For him to keep progressing upwards is not a difficult thing.

And yet, for Sui-zhenfushi who holds so much power, he is unable to do anything for his good friend’s career problems. On the surface, it seems that this is due to the entirely differently systems that govern the promotions for Embroidered Uniform Guards and civil officials.

However, Sui Zhou believes that this is the result of him not being powerful and strong enough. If he had the power and authority that someone like Grand Tutor Sun Ji Zong has now, even if Liang Wen Hua wanted to sabotage Tang Fan, he would have to reconsider and they would not be stuck in this situation where they can only react to changes.

Tang Fan sees his frustration and instead comforts him, “You do not need to be like this. I know you are doing this for my own good but whether or not I continue to be an official, this is not under yours or my control. I have already done my best at the things I need to do and have no regrets. You don’t have to worry about things that will happen in the future.  We should live in the present, and there will always be things to worry about tomorrow!”

Sui Zhou hears this and does not know if he should be reassured by how open-minded Tang Fan is, or worried that he is so nonchalant.

Then again, if Tang Fan was the the type of official that went after status and power, focusing only on promotions, then the both of them would unlikely have any common interests or views, or become good friends.

It is commonly said that there is a everything happens for a reason, and if you lose something you will also gain something. Although it is impossible for everything to go smoothly, but they headed into Marquis Gong’s tomb, meet bloodthirsty, merciless and ferocious tomb-guarding beasts and originally thinking that they would have to die down there, and they ended up returning safely. This is already a fortunate thing; hey really should not ask for too much.

In any case, he has plenty of savings and when it comes to that, Sui Zhou can definitely afford to take care of him. All he has to do is think of ways to make Tang Fan stay.

Sui Zhou does not realise that unconsciously, he has already been influenced by Tang Fan’s casual, broad-minded attitude. The way he used to regard life in a strict and narrow manner is also slowly changing.

If it was before, he might have gotten angry at Tang Fan’s lack of ambition and competitive drive, and the way he does not seem to want to work with anyone else, but right now, he instead understands Tang Fan and acknowledges his friend’s perspective towards life.

This is because Sui Zhou knows that it is not that Tang Fan does not want to progress upwards, that he doesn’t work hard. It is that he has already done his best within the limitations of his capabilities, and he does not want to force things. He prefers to let things come as they will - he works with the determination of wanting to work towards maintaining peace in this world, but as a person, he is happy being himself and will deal with things when they happen.

To be able to be friends with him is the other person’s fortune.

“You’re right,” Sui Zhou’s mouth curves upwards, and his heart eases.

He does not know when it started; when he looks at this person and thinks about him, his eyes lose the cold and hard edge usually present when he looks at others, and what’s left behind is a light layer of happiness.

***

“Guang Chuan, after we head back, you better make a trip to Yuan-zhenfushi’s. He has been with the Embroidered Uniform Guards for so many years and though he does not think much of power and status, he is definitely not someone who will let others step on him. Since he let you command the whole of the Northern Administrative Court, this means that he obviously is impressed with your abilities and is intent on making you his successor. If you can obtain his complete approval and you absorb all of Yuan Bin’s power and connections, then even if Wan Tong returns, he will not be able to touch you easily. At that point you would control the Northern Administrative Court firmly, and naturally will not be afraid of Wan Tong.”

“And,” Tang Fan sits on the bed and bends at the waist to remove his shoes and socks, then hugs the covers and lies on the bed as he plans for Sui Zhou, “You are Empress Dowager Zhou’s grandnephew and the trust that the Emperor has for you is not lesser than the trust he has for Wan Tong. After you return, you must remember two things and you will be able to stand firmly before the Emperor. No matter how Wan Tong tries to sabotage you, he will not be able to do anything to you.”

Sui Zhou raises an eyebrow, “I’m all ears.”

“Firstly, no matter what the Emperor wants to do, you must not oppose him. If he asks for your opinion, you must not respond. Whatever he says, you do, unless it clashes with your principles. Secondly, after Wan Tong drags Yuan Bin down, you must ask for leniency for Yuan Bin. If the Emperor asks you for a reason, you should say that you are willing to serve him as Yuan Wen served the previous Emperor. Not only will the Emperor not blame you if you say this, but he will also pardon Yuan Bin, and be closer to you as well.”

The Cheng Hua Emperor has plenty of bad habits but at the same time, he is also rather soft-hearted and nostalgic. However, he is also an Emperor and emperors do not prefer their subjects to oppose them day in and out. With this type of personality, the Emperor is indeed a very contradictory person.

Although Tang Fan has only seen the Emperor in person a few times, from the descriptions of people who often interact with him such as Sui Zhou and Wang Zhi, it is not difficult to deduce the Emperor’s character.

What he has just said to Sui Zhou can be regarded as him guessing at the Emperor’s thoughts and this is taboo. If it wasn’t someone like Sui Zhou who he is this close to, Tang Fan will definitely not say any of this.

Sui Zhou naturally understands and his heart warms as he enjoys this treatment.

“I understand, thank you.”

“Between you and I, is there any need for thanks?” Tang Fan smiles.

At night, Tang Fan sleeps rather restfully and these problems have obviously not affected his mood.

Sui Zhou, however, is unable to sleep.

Tang Fan took the initiative and asked to sleep on the inside so that he would not accidentally press on Sui Zhou’s injuries if he tosses and turns. He is lying on his side and his back is almost pressed entirely against the wall. Sui Zhou feels uncomfortable on his behalf just looking at him, but Tang Fan is still able to descend into his dreams.

Sui Zhou’s gaze is sombre and he looks quietly at Tang Fan for a long while, then reaches out to touch that handsome face.

His fingers land on the other’s lips, but he only lightly caresses for a moment. The touch is not made out of lust or want, only respect and sincerity.

Before he met Tang Fan, Sui Zhou was actually incredibly lonely inside.

The Sui family members are not able to understand why Sui Zhou entered the Embroidered Uniform Guards, and in their eyes, Sui Zhou should have emulated his older brother, working hard at the imperial examinations, helping the family to forge a path of honour which will allow them to get rid of the reputation that says they relied on their external relatives for status. Although the authority the Embroidered Uniform Guards wield is great, they have a terrible reputation as well. If he had received an empty title, that’s one thing, but being called a dog to the imperial court, what is this?

However, Sui Zhou does not need anyone to understand him. He is like a single, long wolf, moving forward on a path he has set his heart on.

And then he met Tang Fan.

A person who genuinely wants to help him to plan and strategise for the future.

To be able to attain such a soulmate, what more can he ask for?

He can only reciprocate with everything he has.

The bright moonlight peeps in through the window and lands on Tang Fan’s face. This illuminates his beauty and makes him look like an immortal, unlike a common man.

Suddenly, Deity Tang moves his lips, as if saying something.

Sui Zhou’s curiosity is piqued and he moves closer, but he ends up hearing Tang Fan mumble, “Crab roe… tofu soup…”

Sui Zhou, “…”

Tang-daren’s imposing and noble image has been shattered.

===

Notes:

*今朝有酒今朝醉，明日愁来明日愁 - An idiom that literally translates to ‘I will get drink on alcohol today, and worry about tomorrow when tomorrows comes.” Means to live in the present and worry about things when they happen rather than in advance.