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#but so far I was never happy when anyone told me that I should grow my hair out again
nofckingcluebro · 16 days
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So I never really see posts about it, but I actually hate drawings that show Thanatos with long hair.
Don't get me wrong. The drawings are beautiful. Even Jen Zee posted a drawing with him having long hair. And Moros looks dope with it. For me it's not a style problem.
But he talks about never missing his long hair, and how he "chopped it all off and never looked back", and as somebody who did that, I can more than relate.
I understand that people like men with long hair, or long hair in general, and when they say that someone would look good with a certean type of hair don't mean bad, but often times that person actively chooses not to have that hairstyle. For me, having long hair always felt bad and suffacating, and even now when it gets just a bit too long I sometimes want to rip it out, and short hair is way more convinient and comfortable, and Thanatos actively says that he prefers it.
Anyways, point is, don't force people to have or do something they don't want. Feel free to make your art and everything, again, they look good, and are nice. But just remember what that character/person thinks of it. Also I honestly hope Super giant will never make a game that plays after the first Hades in time with long haired Thanatos in it. It's their character and all, but somehow it'd feel.. disrespectful and out of character to me.
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milaisreading · 1 year
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Exes
Author: I wrote this while I was taking a break from studying, so I thought, why not post it as a 1k special! Hope u all like it
Warning: None in particular(?) Some insults are thrown here and there. Y/n uses she/her
⚽️Blue lock belongs to:Muneyuki Kaneshiro and Yusuke Nomura⚽️
"Let's break up." (Y/n)'s eyes widened in surprise as she stared at the boy across the table. This wasn't what she expected to happen on Valentine's day of all times. Both her and her boyfriend were at a café near their school, having a cliché date that (Y/n) really enjoyed so far. The food was nice, the weather was great and overall she enjoyed her time with her boyfriend, but as she came to realize she was the only one who was having a nice time. She put her fork down and nervously gulped, her appetite for the cake already gone.
"Ehm... are you serious, (Ex/n)?"
"Why wouldn't I be?"
"Well... I thought that our relationship was doing well and... a break up was the last thing on my mind." (Y/n) laughed nervously as the boy took a deep breath.
"You can't use that brain as usually."
"What-"
"You don't think. I gave you so many passes in the past how your behavior is embarrassing. I mean, you are so loud and eat way too much, it's weird." (Y/n) gulped down a sob as the boy fixed his glasses and continued speaking.
"You should be lucky anyone lasted this long with you. Let's just end this now and never interact again, unless it's school related."
"Alright..." (Y/n) said quietly, not wanting to cause any scene in the café.
"(Y/n)... (Y/n)!" The girl jumped up at the sound of Anri's voice and she shook her head, looking over at the concerned woman.
"Sorry Teieri-san, I for lost in my thoughts." (Y/n) said sheepishly as Anri slowly nodded her head.
"I can see that, but are you alright? You have been zoning out a lot lately."
"Yeah, don't worry. I was just thinking of someone." (Y/n) admitted as they continued walk towards Ego's office. The woman looked at the younger for a moment before smirking and nudging her.
"A boy back home?" Anri teased and (Y/n) smiled sadly, a little down over the recent memory she had of him.
"Ah... you could say that..."
"You don't seem all too happy about him. Did something happen?" Anri raised her eyebrow as (Y/n) looked around nervously before slowly nodding her head. Truth is, she never really told anyone about the break up. Her brother and dad wouldn't be of much help of they heard what he told her, and Isabella would have definitely told her brother, so she just kept everything to herself. Why did she even remember him? Was it the nervousness before the match against Japan's national team? She didn't know, but the memories were anything but pleasant.
"Kinda... we had a bad break up." (Y/n) gave Anri a strained smile.
"You can always talk to me. I know a thing or two about break-ups." The woman said, patting the girl's back. Something in her words hit (Y/n) pretty hard and she started sobbing when the memories started hitting her again.
'This is pathetic...' She thought as Anri started calming her down while pulling her into a hug.
"Shhh... let's go and make some tea, you can tell me what happened if that will help. What do you say?" Anri asked quietly as (Y/n) nodded her head.
"Thank you..."
What neither of the 2 noticed was three pairs of eyes watching them like hawks as their figures started growing farther and farther away.
"Did I hear that correctly? Some nobody caused (Y/n) this much distress?" Karasu grinned maniacally as he clenched his fists.
"I don't know who that asshole thinks he is, but he definitely isn't worth those tears." Yukimiya mused, wondering how he can figure out the guy's identity.
"Murder is legal, right?" Otoya questioned as he looked at his two friends.
"It is, if you plan it correctly." Karasu's grin widened while Yukimiya readjusted his glasses.
"Let's go and inform the rest about this. Maybe Reo can hire someone."
"Ha? (Y/n) had a boyfriend?" Gagamaru asked as Yukimiya finished repeating what he and his two friends heard. Bachira was twitching next to him and some could swear they saw a shadow fall over him.
"Well, I did expect (Y/n) to have been popular with guys... she is so sweet and thoughtful after all." Isagi said with a smile as he thought of their manager, trying to surpass the jealousy in the process.
"Can't believe some guy got to her before I did... well, thankfully he is an ex now." Niko mused as Hiori and Kurona nodded in agreement.
"The guy fumbled so bad, if I was him I would have never let her go." Hiori said as Kurona turned his attention to Karasu.
"There is something you 3 aren't telling us. Spit it out." The boy said, curious about the menacing looks the three had.
"Yeah, while I understand you 3 being jealous, there is something off about the way you guys are acting." Chigiri chimed in.
"Ohh... you guys want to know?" Otoya raised an eyebrow.
"Yes we do. Quite obviously it's something important when Karasu nearly broke his water bottle." Barou sighed, pointing at the bent item.
"Well, that asshole not only broke up with her, but he seemed to have done something worse." Otoya said as he cracked his knuckles.
"And waht would that be?" Aryu asked as the room fell silent, everyone looking at the trio in anticipation and bloodlust.
"We don't know yet, but it was quite bad when she broke down in tears. I will give him a punch for every tear he caused." Karasu grumbled as the rest froze at the statement. Sure, they saw (Y/n) upset at times, but crying? Never, and it was something they never wanted to happen. But alas it did, and they needed to get revenge.
"Did you get the name of the asshole?" Rin asked as he was shaking in rage.
"Sadly no, otherwise you guys would be 3 players short." Yukimiya answered as calmly as possible.
"Ne~ Reo, can you somehow figure the bastard's name out?" Nagi groaned as he pulled on the shirt of an equally pissed of Reo. The boy tsked, if only he had his phone.
"Can you make murder legal?" Bachira chimed in, ready to let his rage out on the unknown boy.
"I will try my best, that bastard lost such a treasure and treated her poorly too." The purple-haired boy groaned.
The day of the big game came and everyone at Blue Lock was beyond nervous and excited, this game will decide everything. The stadium was filled with fans and families, who came to cheer the players on. While the Blue Lock players were getting pep talks from their families, (Y/n) was smiling in fondness at them. Niko just stood silently next to her, looking around the place. As (Y/n) turned her attention to the rest of the stadium, she froze when she saw 3 familiar figures.
'Nooo! What is he doing here?! And why are my friends with him?!' (Y/n) gulped as she saw two of her high school friends talking happily with her ex. A sense of betrayal hit her and Niko tensed up at the shift of her mood.
"Are you alright?" The blue-eyed boy asked as (Y/n) slowly nodded her head, laughing nervously.
"Yeah... it's just that I saw someone I didn't expect." (Y/n) said, trying to pull Niko towards the rest of the team, hoping the trio didn't notice her.
"Hey! (Y/n)!!!" The girl flinched as both her and Niko turned to look at a brown haired girl as the blonde next to her waved her hand.
"Ahh! You two are here, too?!" The girl said nervously, letting go of Niko, who observed the trio in wonder.
"Not just us, (Ex/n) is here too! Romantic, right?!" The boy readjusted his glasses and nervously waved at her.
"You know them?" Niko asked and (Y/n) nodded her head.
"Yeah, those two girls are my friends from school."
"And the dude?"
"Oh... we used to date for a short while. I wonder why he is here..." (Y/n) said absent-mindedly as Niko's eyes widened and slowly narrowed, making a mental note of his face.
'That... that dude made (Y/n) cry? The audacity!'
"What took you so long?" Isagi asked as Niko walked into the locker room.
"Yeah, you were pretty cozy out there." Reo rolled his eyes.
"Shut it. I figured out who the trash is." Niko said. Gagamaru raised an eyebrow at the answer and Bachira tilted his head.
"What trash?"
"The guy who broke up and made (Y/n) cry. Literally the lowest form of life for not only that, but also in looks." Niko cringed as Chigiri spit out his water.
"Where is he?! Will I be able to kick a ball in his face?" The redhead asked as Rin shook Niko a few times.
"Why didn't you call us over sooner? I would have thought that trash a lesson or two."
"I would have killed him, to be quite honest with you." Kurona chimed in. Hiori and Aryu held Karasu and Barou back from barging out of the room to search for the guy. They didn't want to upset (Y/n) before the game, now after... after they will turn a blind eye to whatever they decide to do.
"That ugly piece of shit." Nagi muttered.
"Let's just win this game, and after we can worry about him." Otoya suggested, holding back his own anger.
"And what do you suggest we do with him?" Gagamaru wondered, but instead Yukimiya answered instead.
"Easy, we will let Barou, Nagi, Karasu, Rin, Aryu and you handle him. The rest of us will keep (Y/n) away in case she wants to look for him."
"What?! I want to hit him!" Bachira protested.
"We all want to, but we can't just leave (Y/n) all alone, she will grow suspicious." Isagi interjected, more interested in her well-being than in the guy right now.
"And besides, the height of them will be enough to scare him off." Niko added in.
"He is short?" Reo asked.
"Yep. (Y/n) did charity work there." The black-haired boy nodded.
After the game had ended (Y/n) was sent out to get some extra towels and a few other things. The euphoria of the boys winning made her a little bit unaware of her space, so she didn't notice the team watching as she left, nor did she notice her ex running right after her till it was too late.
"(Y/n)! Wait!" The girl froze on the spot and slowly turned around to look at the boy.
"Oh... (Ex/n)... did you need something?" (Y/n) asked nervously, backing away little by little.
"I... I wanted to talk with you. The last time we really spoke..."
"You broke up and insulted me." (Y/n) finished for him, a mix of sadness and anger bubbling up in her.
"Was it really insulting if I said the truth?" The boy raised his eyebrow as the girl clenched her fists.
"Yes, yes it is. You had nor right to tell me all those things, a simple break up would have been enough. Especially when the things I did were normal and not bothering anyone. Please just leave me alone." (Y/n) glared at the boy, who was pretty surprised at her response.
"So Blue Lock taught you how to speak-"
"And you weren't taught any manners." (Y/n)'s eyes widened in surprise as she saw Karasu and Nagi grab the boy's shoulders.
"What are you two doing here?" (Y/n) raised her eyebrow, surprised they left the group.
"We wanted to see where you are. Chigiri needs help." Aryu added, making his presence known.
"Chigiri?"
"Yeah! Come on! I will bring you to him!" Bachira's voice was heard as he ran to where (Y/n) was grabbing the girl's arm.
"Bachira-"
"Let's go!" The brunette cheered, sending a menacing smile towards the shaken up boy and dragged her away. Once out of eyes and ears shot, Rin, Gagamaru and Barou made their presence known and sent the boy death stares.
"So, care to repeat what you told (Y/n) on the day you broke up with her?" Nagi said coldly.
"You can do it civilly or we can force you to say it." Rin added in. The ex gulped as the taller boys sent daggers his way.
"Spit it out, dumbass." Barou demanded.
"Shouldn't we wait for the rest?" (Y/n) questioned Bachira as his hold on her arm tightened.
"Nah~ they will join us soon, anyways!"
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wayfayrr · 9 months
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haiiiii can i get uhhhh... spiked latte with Peppermint brittle to take away :3 yan! sky fics are not a want they are a NEED- MOSS HELP ME PLEASE---
order up!! hope it's to your tastes <3
well @sketchyspook - I've got your yan sky here for you with him being a manipulative pos for reader while keeping up his soft facade so they can't really question it :D
[Event masterlist]
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“I still can’t believe that link, I mean of all people to fall in love with, you chose the person who was playing through your game? You could have been with a literal reincarnation of your goddess. ”
“You know none of the others were real right? I’m the only one who was alive… as far as I’m aware or care.”
“Still, I can’t believe you don’t resent me even a little bit. I made you re-live your quest so many times and I didn’t even know you were alive.” 
All I get in return for that is a playful eye roll like I’d told him a dumb joke rather than confessing how awfully I treated him when he was trapped. It’s rather unnerving how calm he is about all of this, but I really shouldn’t push it any more. I don’t think it would be a pleasant mess to clean up if he snapped and did realise everything he’s been through wasn’t right. 
“Can’t this wait until the morning love? We’ve both been through a lot today so we should get some rest right?”
He’s still insisting on calling me that? I do like it, my childhood crush speaking to me like I’m his lover, but something about it seems so wrong.
“Sure, right, fine. I’ve got a guest room and some spare pyjamas you can borrow link.”
“Thank you [name].”
The feeling of something being off with his attitude only grows as he gently grabs my hand while I’m showing him where he can stay. He’s too possessive about this, too happy, even for getting out of a hellscape that his game must’ve been for him, it’s unnerving. My guest room is small and simple with a bed, a small desk and a wardrobe, all in all somewhat reminiscent of his old dorm room. But it should be more than enough for him. 
“There should be some spare clothes in the cupboard, my friends tend to just leave them here for whenever they visit.” 
“And they’ll be fine with me just using them?”
“They don’t need to know, I’ll wash them tomorrow when we go out to get you some of your own. Goodnight link.”
“Sleep well, love.”
He shouldn’t need my help changing, so I’m confident in leaving him in here while I go shower and settle down for the night too. 
Having a hot shower works wonders for clearing your head, a good night’s rest should help to put everything regarding link into focus. 
“Hey.”
“Huh? I thought you said you liked the other room? What made you want to sneak into mine?”
“I tried to sleep, but being in there on my own? I was scared I would wake up back in skyloft without you.”
Turning him away if this is true would simply be cruel to him, it doesn’t help the feeling from earlier crawling back though. That he’s possessive, unhealthily so, but I have to brush it off. Maybe I’m just overthinking, maybe he’s just getting used to being real still. It could be any reason like that.
“Move over so that I can get in as well then.”
“You- you’re really not going to ask me to leave my dove? I know theirs a reason I fell for your kindness… I’ll never let anyone else come close to having you like this.”
“What was that?”
“I said you’re not going to ask me to leave and go back to the other room alone?”
Okay, there is definitely something deeply wrong with him if what I think I heard is what he really said. He’s not going too like me questioning him though, and I don’t exactly have the energy for it either. Which I think he can tell, his arms are so warm and welcoming though, it’d be torture to peel myself out of them. Drifting off to sleep where he wants me is just the natural result of how comfortable he is. 
“See [name], Isn’t it just so nice to be my lover? Wouldn’t you prefer for it to just be me and you like this forever?”
I’m not even awake enough to respond, instead closing my eyes and sighing against him. 
“I knew you would… don’t worry my dove, you’ll never leave my side again. No matter what.”
Ending that haunting sentence with a kiss to my neck and a gentle hum, seemingly more content than he’s ever been. Just from holding me in his arms as we both drift into a deep sleep. 
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lexyleblancc · 2 years
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Baby Monk {Osferth}
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Summary: You save the Baby Monk from Finan’s constant teasing 
Osferth x fem!reader
Word count: 859
Warnings: Nothing :)
“Finan, leave him alone.” Your voice sounded as you approached the two men. Finan could often be found poking fun at the warrior-monk, and to your dismay the ladder accepting it. 
“Must you always take the fun out of it?” Finan asked with a groan, turning to face you. You smiled slightly, patting the man on the shoulder before nodding your head in the direction of the others who were setting up camp. 
“Uhtred is looking for you.” You told the man, Finan leaving without another word. You turned your attention to Osferth, a small sigh slipping past your lips. “You shouldn’t let Finan mock you so much.” You told him, making Osferth look at you shocked. Normally when you would tell Finan to leave him alone, you would go after him and never give Osferth a second glance. It was no joke between the others that Osferth had feelings for you. The others found it entertaining, you thought it was cute when his face would burn bright when you would talk to him. 
“It makes him happy.” Osferth spoke quietly, looking down to the leaves under his feet. 
“Does it make you happy?” You asked, cranking your neck so he would look at you. “Osferth, just because others find joy in something, doesn’t mean you should always allow it.” You told him, giving him a small smile when he finally met your eyes. “Finan is a great man, and he finds humor where he can… don’t allow yourself to be on the wrong end of his jokes.” You turned to walk away from the man, leaving him to dwell on your words when he called after you. 
“(Y/N)?” You hummed as you glanced over your shoulder at him. “Why are you being nice to me?” If your heart could shatter upon hearing mere words you were sure it would have. 
“Us bastards should stick together.” You finally said, a small laugh leaving your lips as you offered your hand to him. “If I didn’t have Sihtric growing up… well let’s just say you have many people around that look at you like a little brother now, and I’m afraid I have been a little cold towards you.” You never knew how to take Osferth’s crush on you. Never had anyone looked at you with pink cheeks, stuttering over their words as they spoke to you. Your brother, Sihtric, found joy in the fact that someone had finally made you nervous, even if he was a Christian man. Sihtric hated the idea of marrying you off, it was his responsibility since you had no one else, but he also knew you had the soul of a warrior. 
You had been alongside Sihtric your entire lives, and when he swore to serve Uhtred, you followed your brother. Finan had joined your little band of warriors after him and Uhtred had been saved from the slavers, and Osferth was the last to join. You didn’t have high hopes for the monk when he first joined Uhtred’s service, he had no experience with a sword, and had never witnessed a battle. You assumed he would have died quickly, but he surprised you. 
“You haven’t been cold towards me.” Osferth told you finally, moving his hand from yours so he could situate the two of you so you were linking arms instead. “I just assumed you didn’t like me.” He told you truthfully. 
“I’m afraid that is far from the truth.” you didn’t intend to say it outloud, but the words had spilled from your lips before you could take them back. 
“Really?” The grin of his face was enough to make any woman weak in the knees. 
“Yes, really.” You told him, a smile to match his falling upon you. “I’m afraid I’m not great with emotions.” You said, looking from him and back to the trees that surrounded the two of you as you walked. “So being around you has sometimes made me nervous.” 
“I make you nervous?” Osferth asked, making you roll your eyes at his new found ego. 
“If you’re going to start teasing like Finan, maybe I should stop intervening to save you the trouble.” 
“Forgive me, (Y/N). I just can’t find it in myself to believe that a warrior like yourself would like a monk.” Osferth told you truthfully, his head bowing as he spoke. You pulled him to a stop, tilting your chin to meet his gaze as you smiled softly. 
“I may not care for your God Osferth, but that does not mean I cannot care for you.” You told him, leaning up slightly and pressing a kiss to his cheek. “Now,” You cleared your throat to admire his pink cheeks slightly. “The others are waiting for us.” You told him, stepping away from him to continue the walk back to the rest of the group. 
Osferth watched you walk away, his mouth slightly agape. He could feel the heat radiating off his face, which made it even worse knowing he had to go back to face the others like this. “Come along baby Monk!” You called, not looking over your shoulder. 
“Coming!” 
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thatlovinfeelin · 1 year
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Half a Heart - One - Jake Hangman Seresin
Blaire Montgomery moved away from all she ever knew at eighteen to conceal a secret. Now nearly fourteen years later, her secret is finally out of the bag when her and her thirteen year old daughter, Lucy, quite literally run into Jake Seresin, young Lucy's father. All three lives are forever changed due to one fateful encounter, and two hearts are once again made whole.
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Blaire Montgomery walked along the street, hand in hand with her daughter, laughing at a joke that the young teenager just told. Together, they made their way across the board walk of Virginia Beach, towards their intended lunch destination. 
“Mama, just once, you really should try it.”
“Nope, not going to happen Lulu.”
The younger girl, Lucy or Lulu, just frowned, but continued walking alongside her mother. They were best friends, maybe something stronger than that. Blaire was just a child herself, not even nineteen when she had Lucy. They grew up together, making their bond stronger than anyone could ever really understand. 
Lucy didn’t know who her father was, and probably never would. Blaire was counting on never seeing the man again. Which seemed funny, considering they lived in a military dominated area. But she never imagined that the man would be stationed here. 
She was eighteen when she found out she was pregnant, just after graduation. There was no way she could tell the father, not when he was planning on being so much more than just the small town boy he was. She didn’t want to hold him back, she couldn’t be the reason he never saw his dreams come true. So she lied to him and broke up with him. Blaire even went as far as moving shortly after, so he would never know. 
Her own family didn’t know who fathered her beautiful little girl, though she was sure they had their ideas. She would never confirm or deny them, only changing the subject whenever they asked. It helped that she hadn’t heard from him in nearly fourteen years too.
She grew up, she moved on. Going on a few casual dates here and there, but never anything serious. It was hard to be serious with someone when she had Lulu to look after. Even now that she was old enough to be left home alone and take care of herself, it was hard. Blaire couldn’t really think about bringing any man home who wasn’t the man she gave her heart to all of those years ago. 
Because the truth was, she might have broken up with him, but she never really got her whole heart back. 
“I’m staaaaarrrrvinnnggg,” Lulu said, dramatically dragging out the word. 
“Which is why we’re going to get lunch before we keep shopping,” Blaire reminded her daughter, “C’mon, just a few more minutes.”
“I’m going to die before we get there,” Lulu whined, “Die of starvation. Wither away to nothing right in front of you.”
“God, how did you get so dramatic?” Blaire questioned, “I swear I was never this bad when I was your age.”
They rounded the corner, restaurant now in sight and Lulu let out a loud sigh and tugged her mother along faster. They were seated almost instantly, making Lucy extremely happy. They ordered appetizers and fell into a comfortable conversation about school. 
Lucy was in middle school now, which seemed almost impossible to Blaire. It was hard for her to realize that her daughter was growing into a fine young woman and was almost an adult of sorts. 
“So Liam Mackey tried to ask me out yesterday,” Lulu said, taking a bite of a mozzarella stick. 
Blaire had to keep herself from choking on her water, “Oh really? What did you say?”
She was hoping her daughter said no. She wasn’t ready to deal with dating yet. Middle school drama was one thing, but boyfriends and heartbreaks were something else entirely and Blaire might just have a heart attack if she had to navigate that part of parenting right now. 
“I told him no, obviously,” Lulu rolled her eyes, “He asked out Marlee Parks two days ago, I’m not some sloppy second choice.”
Letting out a deep breath, Blaire reached for her water again and took a large gulp, “Well…good for you for knowing your worth.”
“Liar. You’re thrilled you don’t have to deal with me having a boyfriend yet,” Lucy teased. 
“You’re right,” She sighed, “So no dating till you’re thirty, okay?”
“What about you? You’re like thirty and you aren’t going on dates.”
“Okay don’t make me ground you.”
“You wouldn’t dare,” Lucy countered, sticking out her tongue.
Blaire sighed again, knowing her daughter was right. She wouldn’t ground her. Blaire wasn’t one to ground or really punish her daughter at all. Not to say that she didn’t when she had to. But she hated every minute of it. 
When their food came, Lucy wasted no time digging in and eating every bite she could. Blaire almost had to laugh. Her daughter loved food, so much it was almost comical in fact. She was like her father in that regard, the man could eat like no one else. No one except maybe his daughter. 
“We’re still going shopping, right?” She questioned. 
“Yes, we’ll go shopping after lunch,” Blaire laughed.
“Good,” Lulu smiled before taking another bite. 
“Slow down before you choke, honey.”
Lulu made a face and continued to wolf down her food. Blaire couldn’t do anything but laugh at her little girl. Her sweet daughter. It was hard for her to come to terms with the fact that soon enough she would start really asking questions about her father. 
So far she’d been able to dodge any question Lucy asked about him. Somehow, it had been easy to lie to her. But Blaire knew that time would soon be over, and she would have to tell her daughter the truth sooner or later. Which meant finding him and telling him the truth too. 
They both deserved to know. Blaire knew that. But the thought of them knowing made her chest hurt. She couldn’t imagine the look on his face when he found out, she didn’t want to imagine it really. But she knew that time was running out. 
“C’mon kiddo,” Blaire said, putting money down on the table, “Let’s get going.”
They were hand in hand again on their way out, when Blaire ran into a strong body. She stumbled back. The man in front of her reached out, catching her arms to steady her for a moment. 
“Mom, you okay?” Lucy grabbed ahold of her mom too. 
“I’m fine honey,” Blaire replied, giving her daughter a small smile. 
“Blaire?” The man questioned, eyes widening. 
His head spun, the little girl, who wasn’t so little, called her mom. Which meant if this was Blaire, she had a daughter. A teenager by the look of it. He swallowed hard. He knew those eyes, because they were his own. 
“Holy shit.”
“Mom?” Lucy questioned before looking between her mom and the man. 
She saw it then, the way her eyes matched his. How they had the same cock to their head. Lucy was a smart girl, maybe too smart for her own good. She could see it in the way her mother looked between her and the man. In the way her mom held onto her hand even tighter. Lucy couldn’t help it, she was staring into the eyes of her father, and it seemed like he didn’t quite know it himself. 
“Holy fuckin shit,” Lucy mumbled. 
“Lucielle Grace!” Blaire hissed. 
But then it was his turn, staring into the face of the girl who looked just like him, and the woman he loved more than life itself, “Holy shit.”
That made three. Mother, Father, and daughter, all stunned to be in one another’s presence at long last.
In a panic, the second she heard the man speak her name, sounding so broken and shocked, she grabbed her daughter and pulled her out of the restaurant, not stopping to look back.
He followed them of course, forgetting the lunch date he had. He would apologize to his old friend later. This was more important, this was Blaire. His Blaire. The one girl he could never get out of his head. The one that he still carried a photo of whenever he flew. Because she was his, even if she broke his heart almost fourteen years ago.
"Blaire!" He called, trying to catch up with her.
She slowed when she saw her car come into view. He would catch them there and then there would be no more running away. She licked her lips and stopped, grabbing her daughter's other hand.
"I need you to go wait in the car," She told Lulu, not looking away from her green eyes.
"Mom who is that guy?" Lucy was worried that he was some creep, here to try to hurt her mom.
Maybe he was one of the Tinder dates gone wrong. The ones that Blaire always seemed to be too quiet after she came home from them. Or maybe he was one of the good dates that Blaire blew off because of Lucy, because she was too scared to bring anyone else into their lives.
"Please Lu, go wait in the car," Blaire begged, "It's okay, I promise."
The man was getting closer, almost reaching them when Lucy finally agreed and made her way to the older 4runner parked in a far space under a tree.
Blaire only had a moment before he was on her, grabbing her shoulder to gently turn her around. She didn't force herself to look up at him, knowing she wouldn't be able to handle the look in his eyes when she did.
He was always much smarter than he liked to let on, he had to have put the pieces together. He had to know that he was just staring into the face of his daughter.
God...his daughter. Even thinking it made Blaire shiver. This was never supposed to happen. That's why she moved to Virginia, far enough away from Annapolis or Texas.
"It's you," He breathed out, holding her at arm's length, "God, Blaire, it's really you."
She keeps her eyes tightly closed, too afraid to open them. She want to look at him though, she's aching to see the man he's become. How much he's changed from the boy she once knew. But she still can't bring herself. She can't even speak.
"Say something, please," he begs her, bending down to try to catch her eye.
"Jake," She breathes out, almost like a sigh. It cuts him to the bone to hear her say his name again.
"Who was the girl?" He asks, even though he somehow already knows exactly who she was.
Her eyes open now, looking up to meet the same green eyes that her daughter has. His brows were furrowed in the exact same way, just like the way he was cocking his head to the side. They were so alike and yet they never officially met.
She swallowed the thick lump growing in her throat, "That was my daughter."
He breathes out, like he'd been kicked square in the gut, "She had my eyes."
That's all he could think to say. Because every time he blinked he kept seeing her looking up at him with the eyes that mirrored his own. The same way he had his mother's eyes, and she had her mother's eyes. There was no denying there was some semblance between the two.
"Jake-"
"Blaire," he said urgently, "She had my eyes."
"I don't-"
"How old is she?" He asks, taking a step forward.
"Thirteen," Blaire nearly winces as she says it.
He does the math in his head. It'd been nearly fourteen years since they last saw one another. She broke up with him out of the blue and moved away weeks later, never to be heard from by any of the Seresins again. Now here she is with a thirteen year old who looked just like her, aside from small little details. Like how she had freckles dotting her nose, just like Jake and his sister's had when they were younger.
"Is she mine?" He asks her, almost afraid of the answer.
"Jake, please," She begs so quietly.
"Blaire, is she mine?" He asks again.
She licks her dry lips and tried to gather the courage. This was never meant to happen. She was never supposed to see him again, and he was never supposed to know about having a child. Jake Seresin was supposed to go about his life without her tying him down with a little girl. But it seemed like fate had other ideas
"Yes."
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aonungyou-shit · 1 year
Note
Hi!! , I just read one of your fics and absolutely loved 🥰 I’ve never requested anything before but I saw that you’re are open so here goes nothing…
A Tsu’tey x reader ( jakes younger sister) who was one of the first dream walkers who was sent ahead of her brother and went to graces school to learn along side the children of the clan who they had hoped would be seen as less of a threat and could lean more and get abetter footing in the clan for them , when the school was attacked the reader ran away scared of what the rda was capable of asking the clan for help and since she was still considered a child they took her in when jake gets to there he’s told his sister had died and instead he comes to find her alive within in the clan mated to Tsu’tey and with a family of her own but she’s terrified of her brother
Hi Hi so so terribly sorry its taken me this long to respond! That is an excellent idea and i wish to kiss your brain because the FLAVOR this has is mwah! I hope you enjoy this
Actually i quiet enjoyed this a little too much.
To Lose, To love, To be afraid
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When you came here Around four years now you were fresh to the world of possibilities. You were 17 one of the youngest personal that had been selected for the avatar program. Down on your luck you reluctantly joined. You had never seen yourself live the life you currently had.
You were clumsy at your feet in your new body and new height. Young was your avatar too. Seeing as how some older avatars and Na'vi were just taller than you. Dr. Augustine had been your guide in your new life. The school had been running for 8 years successfully and you were new to said studies. Lucky for herself and you, you were quick to learn.
You were always by yourself. never really fully talking to anyone the first few months. But then Neytiri was the first one to speak to you. You spoke to her sometimes until one day where she caught you outside of school following the gentle flowing of an Atokirina
"what do here Sully?" She asked you stopping you from following any further. It wasn't until she spoke that you realized just how far you were from the RDA camp.
"oh Pardon me. I guess i just got too caught up in Pandora's beauty"
From then on you continued to talk as if you were nothing else than sisters. She has made great company while you were extremely homesick and missing your only family Jake and Tom.
then Came Sylwanin and Tsu'tey. You knew they came to school. Tsu'tey sometimes when ever given the chance and you had grown to really grow fond of them. A little circle.
Grace had been happy that you had made such progress within the year. You were shown how to hunt, what and what you shouldn't eat. You were being taught much more than grace could teach. Little by little the earth you knew as your home was now a long forgotten past.
And then tension grew. You were dining waiting for Sylwanin and Neytiri when you heard the hushed whispers of the Omatikayan
"Sky demons do not belong here, Walk in a suit of flesh and plan to take over our way of life, We must do something"
"Do not be foolish. Hush your howling and continue to eat least of all do not cause trouble"
"I just think we should speak to One of them. they continue to destroy our land, coming here not knowing what to do"
You felt guilty yes, Felt like this could all be your fault and yet you knew that it wasn't the case. You were just here lucky to be one of the people to hopefully unite humans and Na'vi people.
But the fates are cruel and unkind.
Somehow without your Knowledge Sylwanin and a few other hunters had Destroyed what Humans saw most valuable than some 'savage' lives.
In turn causing one of your friends to die. With a broken cry you yelled helping Dr. Grace to get the remaining children out alive. And with it you ran way with them too.
Your heart sank when you realized that somehow you had managed to drag Sylwanin's body back to the people. Begging Praying that somehow she could still be alive.
Heartbreakingly that would never be the case. Mo'at's cries or anguish, Eytukan's wails of rage and the silent sobs of Tsu'tey and Neytiri was all you could hear. You wanted to cry. Hell you did cry, But your crying could never be the same as them. Life is sacred. You had learned that now. So many lives were lost. You knew that sooner or later you would have to wake up from this horrible sight and awaken in your human body.
But all you did was beg and cry with the family that this was not the way it should go. You spoke that if they banished you. If they sought to kill you then you wouldn't mind. A life for a life.
However Neytiri refused. Knowing that you had done all you could to save her people's children and bringing back what was sacred to her family clan.
You were young. You were like a baby and for that reason perhaps too had Mo'at allowed you to stay.
But you could never let go of this guilt. You told them that you came here to seek peace to hopefully live united. But humans can be cruel and no doubt would never see anything wrong with killing sentient living beings.
For humans can be selfish and don't see people as people. But obstacles.
You swore that you were of the people. That you would do what you can with your human body to help the Omatikayan people. But you knew maybe not all of them trusted you. You had grown wary of what you say or that of how you speak.
When you awoken in your human body you went to console Dr. Augustine. Who in her heart break yelled and screamed that what they did was detrimental to what they were trying to accomplish.
But her status meant nothing to men with power.
Threatening her to silence.
"How are the people" she asked you sometimes when you came back from your walking with the Na'vi. And you relied what information you could. Wary of prying ears.
It was only weeks and already You had before one of the people. You would soon be able to make Your bow from home tree. Neytiri congratulating you. and begrudgery Tsu'tey as well.
He Grew to like you once before. But after the death of his promised he had grown to be avoidant of you. Heartbreak was a rather hard thing to get over. You can deny it all you want but you had lost two friends that day.
"You did well" He spoke to you.
You couldn't shake the feeling the immense guilt. The spark was brighter yes but it was anger, discomfort hatred for what you once were.
"are you well?"
"I am, You have proven yourself to be with us"
"That is not what i mean Tsu'tey"
He bit his lip. Ears flattening as he looked at you. You were once what he hated. But it never was your fault. He couldn't forgive that which was only ever filled with greed.
But you weren't to blame. and he could not be angry. For better or for worse things happen as Eywa deems it to happen. He lost someone and in turn found someone with you.
"It keeps me up at night"
"im so sorry"
"do not apologize, You were never the one to blame." he spoke hand now resting on your shoulder. " you and i are one in the same now. You are one mighty fine warrior. I am sure if you were to choose a mate then they will be lucky to hold you"
" i dont think i deserve such thing"
"why? did someone say something like that? just say the word."
You couldn't help but laugh just a little as you sat down. It would be a while before neytiri would call you to receive your paint and be celebrated as that of the people so you could only figure to kill time
"once, Back home"
"Someone said that to you?"
"Yes. But i hold no ill will no malice. Perhaps they are right"
"none sense! Y/n you are mighty and you are strong! Who ever said that is foolish"
You saddened a little. To have someone say that it was different. It felt nice to be told you were something that you never saw yourself as. "Humans are cruel"
"i know"
"Humans kill each other. they kill that of what gives life. Our mother's dead. She died a long time ago and we killed her. Tsu'tey if i am honest i dont want to return. I don't ever want to blindly follow that who brings sorrow and destruction. Tho i know i cannot leave my human body behind." You didnt know where this was coming from.
But he just sat there and listened to your troubles.
" i think it be cruel to leave my potential mate while i live with humans one moment and return the next. That is not right i know it. To be without your other at night. Its dreadful to think about"
Tsu'tey listened to that and somewhere deep in him. Something enlightened. Some crazy idea. he would bring it to mo'at once you had chosen your mate.
However somewhere inside him he began to frown. Was he angry, no he was..lost. Truly he had never held romantic feelings for anyone but Sylwanin and even then it was solely cause he had so much time to try and develop something for her.
Once he was chosen to be her's well he saw no greater honor then to burry his thoughts of choosing someone for him, and here you were disassembling everything he build up.
However now he was promised to Neytiri and while he saw her as a younger sister he had taken that role too. Eywa had her plans. But had she placed you right here in front of him? making his heart beat a little more for you than anyone else?
"Do not worry im sure something will work out"
"Ah Sully there you are" Neytiri said now looking at Tsu'tey and then at you. "good Tsu'tey can help too"
He frowned a little before sitting in front of you and Neytiri behind you.
Your eyes were down cast as you felt the two Na'vi paint you. Not wanting to think too much. There was a lot to think about but that would be all for tonight.
Tsu'tey was having trouble however. How could someone he have hated for being a demon now become someone he longed to protect too? no. You weren't a demon now.
His fingers now lingered on your lips as you stared at him. his eyes staring at where his fingers remained. Before looking at your eyes.
You were uncanny and yet not at the same time. Your eyes were just a little smaller than theirs. Your lips a little fuller than theirs. Your figure was just the tad bit more fuller. You were a dream walker yes.
"You are Omatikayan now"
you wanted to cry a little. but didnt want to ruin the paint before the ceremony.
But once you returned to your human body you didn't tell Grace. You could not tell her. Even if you trusted her. For you were going to try something absolutely insane with the help Of Tsu'tey.
-*-*-*-*-*-
"Y/n Sully is dead" Was all grace got suddenly when your lifeless body came back. Your mask hanging off your face where no doubt this planets atmosphere had killed you.
She wept of course but pushed on as to guide the new people But she mourned you as she had Sylwanin, as she mourned the many Na'vi children who caller her Sa'nok.
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You were happy. You had lived 2 full years with the Omatikayan people. In your once fake body now your fully in soul and mind. In those first few months of being fully Na'vi Eywa seemed to test you. You weren't strong like these Women You had always left the fighting to your two older brothers. So you took up the role of a gatherer.
But you were mighty as Tsu'tey had said. Which caused him to seek guidance within The Tsahik and Olo'eyktan. He didn't want to dissapoint them he hadn't wished to grow to fond of you. But you had helped save many children. You adored your role now that you were of the people.
And he could not deny his feelings anymore. He wanted to have you if you would ever so much as liked to have him too.
You had been out when Neytiri had brought you back. Your basket filled with goods as you entered Tsahik's hut.
"Oel ngati kameie, Mo'at" You greeted. Setting your basket in between you and her. Her gaze was one that had looked through you a lot of times. one that before had caused a chill to run up your spine.
That time she had seen you.
She told you what Tsu'tey has asked. She had never seen him be serious like he had been in asking, pleading with her to be with you instead. She understood that Her remaining Heir did not love Tsu'tey and so with guidance from Eywa she let it be.
You would not take long to return those feelings. And it wasn't long after that of which you two had mated that you fell pregnant. Life was not as it once was for the Omatikayan people. Never had a sky demon infultrated their clan and lived along side them.
It wasn't as it once was. The threat of the RDA still rose high. And yet you had welcomed a healthy baby boy into pandora.
That had been almost six months ago and counting. Tonight you had decided to accompany Neytiri in her hunt. Tsu'tey had been reluctant of course, Having to take care of a six month old and then you with your prominent belly full of your second child.
However as night fell You watched as Neytiri pointed to a figure.
You looked from where you stood. An Avatar. It caused your body to run cold. You had not seen an Avatar in over two years. But never the less you followed Neytiri's lead.
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Jake Had been told that you had lost your life due to the harsh world of Pandora. Now left alone in this cruel life. Tom and yourself lost to this world that he wanted to help conquer. He hadn't seen your body. But Dr. Augustine had been frank with him. This oxygen killed you.
The Training killed Tom. And now facing off the dangers he was going to get killed too.
Within a blink he had seen two fierce figures jump to his aid. Slaying that of which he could never understand. Before stopping to thank one.
Then They turned to look at him.
"Don't Thank, You do not Thank for this. This is sad" She spoke with vigor as she had been furious.
Jake Turned to look at you and in that instant you felt your body run cold.
"you... Jake or Tom?" you asked between a hushed tone as you looked at said Avatar.
"Y/n? but. But your dead! Dr. Augustine said you were she saw you, you were dead" he exclaimed. At that tone you instantly knew.
Marine. It was Jake and maybe that's why that sinking feeling of fear dropped to your stomach.
Jake knew your features. They were one of a kind. He knew instantly he did and yet it made no sense as to how you were here in front of him. How were you alive when you were dead? You died two years ago did you not? meaning you were now twenty one? but how could it be
how is it possibly to continue to live once you died.
"Quiet!" Neytiri spoke breaking you out of your haze as she began to ask you in Na'vi to come. To let him be lost to the forest. With fear in your heart you did. Running ahead of her and by default Jake as he tried to reach you to talk to you. Trying to get answers and thank you at the same time.
You wanted to retort back before you stopped. The great mother that had guided you here long ago now there she was. Floating gracefully down to your brother.
which he then swatted at.
"Kehe!" You yelled
"Ftang nga!" Neytiri retorted.
Jake Paused before trying to swat again.
"Rutxe. No" Neytiri said now holding his arm as she was the one closest to him. "Atokirina!"
You looked at each other in awe as more seem to go down around him. "Atokirina.."
Neytiri turned to you now. "Lolu Aungia"
Biting back the fear you felt you nodded as you helped guide Jake back. Neytiri telling him to follow.
And when Jake would wake once again in his human body he had quiet a bit to tell back.
-*-*-*-*-*-
When Dr. Augustine was welcomed back to the clan She sought you our first and foremost. She could not believe what jake had told her. It was impossible to believe. That an Avatar was no longer that but a breathing conscious body that once was human.
Moreover she could not believe when She had tried educating Jake on the roles of the people that Tsu'tey no longer was the next Olo'eyktan in line. She could not believe that you were now a mated pair
She was morbidly curious about your offspring too. So once she had gotten permission from Mo'at she went to talk to Tsu'tey.
How big he had gotten. How strong he was.
"Tsu'tey, Oel ngati kameie" She greeted him formally before he turned to look at her
"Sa'nok! Oel ngati kameie, how long its been"
She agreed and Asked him to sit down and talk. And talk they did. She asked how life had been treating him and if he was happy. And once that was all she apologized.
"Forgive me for what they done to Sylwanin"
"Don't fret. It is not your blame." He spoke reassuring her "she lives within our great mother now."
"yes i know...How, no.. is it true that you and Y/n have.."
"It is. She has bore me one strong son. And we await the arrival of our newest member of our family clan"
As if right on time you barged into your home. A babe strapped to your chest resting atop your swollen bump. and a basket resting on your hip.
"Y/n!" Grace spoke without even thinking. hugging you tight. Ever so grateful that Jake's words ran true. You were alive. You were spared.
"Grace?"
"You're alive."
You couldn't help but smile. Trying to hug her as best as you can before your son began to fuss.
"oh Shit sorry" she excused herself seeing the little tot fuss at suddenly being squashed.
"What is his name?"
"Tsaro Rongloa Tsu'tey'itan." You proudly stated Sitting down finally to let yourself rest.
Dr. Augustine stayed and spoke with you two. Far longer than you had thought you may have allowed before she had to leave. Leaving you and Tsu'tey to speak.
"Something troubles you"
"i am afraid as to Why Jake is here"
Tsu'tey rose a brow.
"you've seen first hand how the RDA are. And what greed does to them. My brother was a marine when i left and he came here armed. And i know he is family but i am afraid"
"i dont like him either. He is a threat to my family"
You smiled feeling his large hand on your growing bump. Looking down at your son.
Your fear was justified. You lost friends and people to the RDA. And if what jake told you was true about Tom. Then you had lost family too.
Your fears were Tsu'tey's but you felt safe within his embrace, unbeknownst to you however Jake would be what would bring you peace one day.
======================
please excuse if my ages make no sense. I really couldnt see how to mathmatically make it make sense so im sorry if it troubles anyone.
EITHERWAY i do hope you enjoyed it
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queeniesblog · 2 months
Text
Desires of The Heart and Body
Pairing: Z x Carmi(Fem Favor!OC)
Word Count: 12.2k
Warnings: Smut
Synopsis:
Thankfully, Z grabbed Carmi's chin and forced her to look directly into his heated eyes. Oh how beautiful they were, she lovingly sighed in silence. Swirls of shimmering gold, crimson as red as rubies and a dash of violet beneath a mess of soft hair hypnotically entranced her, keeping Carmi hanging off of the demon’s every word.
“Do not,” Z growled, glaring down at the dark skinned woman as his tail began to curl around her throat. “Even think about those humans in my presence. Not your pathetic little friends, not your insignificant little ex, and definitely not that sniveling, annoying blue haired idiot.”
Carmi could feel herself trembling, but not from fear. Oh, never from fear. But she wished that it was, for fear would be a far less shameful emotion to have at this moment.
‘Jesus, sweet Jesus,’ Carmi silently prayed to a god she knew would not listen. ‘Please, please, please, do not let this man find out how attractive his voice is. I’ll never hear the end of it.’
Notes: Welcome to the first fanfic I have for planned for the VN Favor! Before the story starts, I would like to give a special shoutout to @concreteparasite for not only creating Z, but also developing this amazing VN that will NOT leave my head. I also would like to give another massive shoutout to zackvalence for absolutely killing this VA role and really bringing Z to life. And finally, I would like to give a big, big shoutout to @winged-self-indulgence for helping me, inspiring me and giving me the courage to actually publish this massive fic. Diya if it wasn't for you I wouldn't have the balls to post this. Please enjoy!
AO3 Link
“...finally I gave up and recommended some simple tips to get better rest: don’t ingest caffeine or alcohol, avoid any tech when getting ready for bed, try lowering the room temperature… You know, things like that.” Carmi’s dark eyes flickered to her drink as she remembered the conversation that took place earlier in the day with her creepy coworker at the movie theater they both worked at. It was already bad enough that Alvin just couldn’t(or wouldn’t at this point) take the hint and give up on his crush on her. A crush that was unreciprocated as Carmi had a boyfriend. A boyfriend who she had told everyone about multiple times. A boyfriend who made her happy. A boyfriend who was…
Listening to her story about her day at this very instant.
“Then I told him if all that didn’t work, then he should just hit up his GP and ask about using some zolpidem or eszopiclone.”
“Hmph.” Z’s face, which was usually a mixture of adorably cute and devilish handsome, had scrunched up in annoyance at the mention of her human co-worker. The demon made no efforts to hide his intense dislike of Alvin. But then again, it didn’t appear to be personal as Z didn’t seem to like anyone in her “friend group”. Maybe that was a red flag. Or, it would be if Carmi didn’t also start to carry an ever growing dislike of her supposed ‘friends’. 
“You should have left him to suffer his fate. That would have been much more entertaining.” Z seemed to perk up at the thought of Alvin having to suffer multiple sleepless nights. Dizzy, disoriented and having to endure splitting headaches every single waking moment. As tempting as it was to ignore Alvin and leave him to suffer, Carmi was worried about him. Not because she cared about her co-worker(quite the opposite really) but more so, concerned that if his mental state deteriorated any further, there was no telling what Alvin could do. As easy as it was to simply wave off Alvin of being incapable of committing horrible actions due to his personality alone, it was better safe than sorry. Carmi would rather deal with a minor annoyance now, than a massive problem later.   
“Hmm.. at least he has good tastes in candies.” Carmi rolled the strawberry bon-bon between her dark fingers. At least helping people sometimes had its perks. Even if Alvin was an annoying, creepy, incel of a stalker, at least he had a general idea of what she liked. “It's one of his few redeeming qualities.”
“Few?” Carmi could already hear Z’s unspoken question of ‘He has ANY redeeming qualities?’
“I mean, as much as I don’t personally like the guy, Alvin isn’t the worst person I’ve had to work with…” Carmi thought long and hard about the many group projects she had to endure in her younger school days. Unfortunately, being the quiet kid with the best grades often meant that her classmates were going to be as useful as a broken candy coated jizz-filled condom.
“He pulls his weight, he doesn’t do things that would get me in trouble, and when I ask him to do something, he does it.” Carmi listed off, oblivious to the demon’s growing ire. “Yeah… he’s not a bad partner at all.”
Carmi swirled the chilled brandy around, as if the sound of the liquid hitting against the glass would help calm her thoughts. Carmi had been in romantic relationships before- first with Jay and then her recent ex, Xander. Feeling sexual desires for another wasn’t new territory for her, hell, even having sex wasn’t. But she had never felt it with such intensity, such ferocity . It was as if the make-out session Carmi had shared with the fiend had unlocked some sort of floodgate. When they were together, it was bad enough, but at least Carmi could distract herself with the endless entertainment that Z provided. He was very good at distracting her from her problems after all.
When they were apart however?
The dark skinned woman knew from the moment that she looked for Z’s adorable dimple whenever he smiled, that she was done for. And unsurprisingly, her hypothesis had been one-hundred percent correct. Whenever the two could not be around each other, it was like utter agony . All she wanted to do was spend time with Z, or talk and text him to see how he was doing when they couldn’t be hanging out. It had even affected her emotionless persona at her job. If there was any time that Carmi didn’t need to use her brain on the job, she would simply sigh and mentally moan about how much better it would be if Z was with her, or she with him. In the back of her head, all Carmi could constantly think about was her boyfriend- his shit eating smile showing off his sharp teeth and split tongue, the smell of whiskey and smoke that curled around his body, his dangerously honey sweet voice, his eyes, his memorizing eyes…
Carmi mentality slapped herself aside the head. She was becoming too clingy. This way of thinking was downright creepy and had gotten to such a bad point that Carmi had bought a black silk choker with an oval shaped pendant. But not just any necklace. No, it was a gorgeous fire stone opal that shimmered beautifully, with the same colors of Z’s eyes. It had cost her a pretty penny too- but when she had first seen it while window shopping on one of her few off days, it was like the dark skinned woman had blacked out. Before Carmi could even register what was going on, the bagged and paid for necklace was already in her hand with the shopkeeper waving her goodbye. She resisted the urge to kick herself as she quickly strode her way back home. Why, why had she done that?! 
Carmi's eyes flickered to the agitated demon as she once again stewed over her thoughts. No, she knew why she had bought the damn necklace. She hated to admit it but… the thought of wearing something that subtly showed just who she belonged to sent a pleasant tingling chill down her spine. God, that was so embarrassing to admit. It was even more embarrassing to admit she was wearing the dang thing! Not that Z had made the connection thankfully. Or… did she want him to notice? A non-verbal symbol of her devotion to him. Would Z like it if they had known just how badly she wanted to be marked by him…?
The small candy felt warm in her hands. Carmi didn’t feel like eating the sweet, nor answering any of the questions she had asked herself. Besides, the woman could see how annoyed her companion had gotten at the mention of her coworker. 
“Uhhh, I don’t really want to eat any sweets right now.” Carmi placed the candy on the table in front of the fiend. She didn’t want to risk touching him, as any physical contact might have emboldened her to ask Z if he wanted to grope her ass or chest. “You can have it if you want-” 
Z swiftly flicked the candy across the table and onto the floor. Or rather, attempted as Carmi quickly intervened, blocking the action with her hand. The strawberry bon-bon rolled pitifully onto the floor.
“Z… why would you do that?”
“It had a bug on it.” Z lied. Carmi sighed and narrowed her eyes at the demon as she pointed a finger at him.
“Listen Z. I don’t know what type of demonic mumbo jumbo you have going on where literally no one reacts to our presence,” Carmi started to lower herself to receive the abandoned candy. “But I was raised to always clean up after myself when I went out to eat. It is never okay to leave a mess!”
“Really now?” Carmi couldn’t see all of Z’s face, but she could practically hear his eyebrow raising. She thought about what she said a bit more as she hummed thoughtfully.
“Hmmm… not really, no. They were pretty abusive to the waiter staff now that I think about it.” Carmi rested her chin on the table. “Not the point though. I always clean up any mess that I make.” 
“Awww, look at you being such a good girl Carmi.” Z cooed as if she was an adorable pet. A tiny shiver nearly ran through her body but she suppressed the sensation. She was getting quite good about doing that around Z now. 
‘Yeah, I’ll be your good girl any day of the week.’ Carmi thought to herself. 
“Haha, yeah! Right back at you, your highness!” Carmi nervously laughed as the woman practically dove underneath the table to hide the blood rushing to her face.
‘Right back at you? RIGHT BACK FUCKING AT YOU?! ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?!’ The urge to slam her head on the wall in frustration was immense. ‘WHY THE FUCK DID I SAY THAT?!’
She wanted Z so, so incredibly badly that at this point, it was making her look fucking stupid. And even though it caused her spikes of shame to run rampant throughout Carmi’s body, it did nothing to rein in the borderline animalistic urges she felt towards the demon. The thoughts about Z couldn’t be stopped at this point.
But… would she want them to stop?
True, it had become difficult for Carmi to rein in her lustful urges. It was if every time she managed to squander one depraved thought about the demon, two more would pop up. They would whisper temptations in her mind, recounting and speculating the possibilities of what could happen if she managed to fuck Z. Each time left Carmi with goosebumps on her dark skin and her feeling like a depraved, dripping mess. But, wasn’t it natural to feel sexual attraction to a romantic partner? Maybe not to this particular degree, but many people had started relationships based on lust and lust alone(they weren’t necessarily good relationships, but that wasn’t the point).   
It wasn’t that she didn’t like being in a relationship with him either. It was in fact, the very opposite. Z had been a breath of fresh air in the piss-filled diarrhea shitstorm that was Carmi’s life. A reprise from all of the worries and fears that plagued her mind. Was it sad to admit that Z had treated her better than anyone else in all of her years alive? Probably, but it wasn't like she had anyone else to tell. The demon was interesting, charming and… surprisingly sweet. He had the ability to distract her from problems she couldn’t immediately fix, or make her laugh so hard that she struggled to breathe. And even when he couldn’t help her with her problems or cheer her up with a joke… Z would just… be there for her. Listen to her worries and offer comfort. They couldn’t fix everything that was wrong in her life, nor did Carmi expect him to. It was the simple fact that he stayed, and supported her that mattered the most. It had felt so foreign and yet so good to know that no matter what, Z had her back, and that she didn’t have to be alone anymore. 
It also didn’t help her that Z was extremely easy on the eyes. Carmi hadn’t even noticed her growing attraction to Z until it was too late. When she had first laid eyes upon him, Z looked… fine. His horns, tail and sharp teeth were such an oddity that it caused her to take a second glance but aside from that, there was nothing particularly notable about him. It was only when Carmi started to grow ever fonder of her demon that she began to take notice of certain features he had. How his brownish black hair curled around his face and horns. Was it always so soft looking? The way that his tail would slow down once the demon was deep in thought was downright adorable. She even took note of how Z even had a cute little dimple on the right side of his face that would appear once he smirked. It was easy to miss, but it was there. Carmi would know considering she stared at it in awe every time it showed. Sometimes, they even gave her cuteness aggression so intense that she just wanted to squeeze him(with both her arms and legs) for the rest of her days. 
In other words, he was stupidly gorgeous.
So why couldn’t she bring herself to finally bang him?
Who was she kidding? Carmi was a terrible flirt and was just as responsible for the lack of intimacy in the relationship as Z. She wanted to, but everytime the opportunity came up, she would just freeze and then laugh it off. And the few times she was bold enough to tease the demon, the courage would disappear faster than her biological parents did once Z retaliated. Why was she like this? She liked Z, she really, really liked him and… Carmi didn’t want to fuck it up somehow.
Suddenly, the idea of hiding underneath the table for the rest of eternity was starting to look very appealing. What if he didn’t like how she looked naked? What if she sounded or said something weird? What if she didn’t pleasure him well enough? So many doubts and worries filled her head that when there was a chance to make a move on him, she restrained herself. But Carmi had needs and was getting desperate at this point. The woman had half a mind to just flash him her fat tits and hoped that it somehow worked out for the both of them.
‘Why won’t you claim me for your own?’ Carmi wanted to ask him. Thinking about Z like that was wrong. But she couldn't help it, and the urges were growing more and more.‘Reach out and take me for yourself? I've dreamed of it. Every single night I have dreamed.’
As her eyes scanned for the discarded candy, Carmi’s thoughts began to wander towards Z once again. She really couldn’t help it. 
Even her own body had become obsessed with him. 
“Fuck…!”
Carmi’s body shuttered and squirmed from the pleasure given to her by her vibrating dildo. Laying on her back, she had one hand on her large chest to play with her tits, twisting and pinching them until they were sensitive. Carmi let out a little whimper as she worked her toy deeper inside with a quiet squelch. What she really wanted to feel was Z sliding two of his fingers deep inside, jackhammering her abused hole. Wanted him to rip off her lacy panties and cram his fat cock inside her, use her like a fleshlight while he moaned about how good she felt. As Carmi got closer and closer to her climax, her brain provided her with new scenarios about Z and she thrusted the toy in deeper.
…Her shoulders on the blanketed floor and her holes pointed up, legs bent as Z furiously pounded into her practically limp body. The position would make Carmi feel vulnerable, exposed and she would love every second of it. Z felt so big and hot that it would feel like her body was melting from the numerous creampies her lover had already so graciously provided her. 
Carmi would then tense up as she reached her own orgasm, the action making the overflowing cum in her twitching hole be pushed out. More and more large pearly droplets would drooled down to hit her bunched-up hem and splashed onto her panting chest with each thrust…
…Or maybe she should ‘conveniently’ forget her panties and spread her legs wide while she wore a shorter dress? That would have to get Z’s attention. Besides, Carmi would love to see the look on his face when  the little fiend had an unrestricted view of her leaking entrance, relaxed and flushed with arousal at their next meetup. The alcohol provided by the bar and the thrill of the exhibition would provide her with all the courage she would need. What would Z do when they noticed? Would he fuck her right there and then on the table…?
No, she should keep the underwear. After all, the idea of Z masturbating while pointing his cock at her crotch so he could cum inside her underwear would get her so hot and bothered. She’d lift up the hem of her dress and hold them between her teeth to better expose her cunt and breasts, just for him. Carmi would love to see Z furiously stroking his cock to the sight of her exposed pussy, flushed and panting like he was a dog in heat. But the feeling of the lashings of pearly cum on her bare mound would feel so much better. Yes… Carmi would love to have something she could feel on her lips all day. Especially if it was from Z…
…Large and heated hands would slip through the spaces between Carmi's arms and firmly gripped her heavy chest at home. A hot mouth settling in the gentle slope between the back of her neck and her shoulder, beginning to leave a trail of kisses and nips in their wake. Carmi would moan and reached back to grasp the demon’s body and horns for support. She’d bet that she would be able to feel his erect cock sliding between her thighs, and grinding himself between her dripping sex as his tail curled around her waist. 
Fuck, she would give anything to have Z swipe his harden shaft through her lips and bump the bottom of her clit, pace growing in intensity as they both reached their peaks. She would flex her thighs around his dick as they both came. Z would be able to feel her tremble with an orgasm of her own, her pussy spasming on top of his cock and she wanted to feel Z slamming his hips against her ass a final time as he spurted rope after rope of hot cum onto her waiting hands in turn. After all, she couldn’t allow a single drop of Z’s load be wasted…
…The two locked in a passionate embrace, Carmi on her back, ankles locked around the demon’s hips, while Z was mounting her, thrusting deeply and drinking Carmi’s ecstatic noises with a deep kiss. He’d hold her in his arms and moan lovingly in her ear about how she was made for him, nobody could take her from him and how they were meant to be-   
Carmi rode out her climax with a wail of pleasure, imagining it was Z who was bringing her to completion instead of some large silicone toy. After regaining control over her labored breaths, the heated pleasure that she felt turned into an icy bath of shame that washed over Carmi. What did she just do?  She had just felt so lustful and pent up in the moment that she… 
The reality of what had occurred set in and she felt something well up in her flushed body. Not shame, but frustration. Even though Carmi had orgasmed, it brought her little relief from the burning well of desire within her. It didn’t seem to matter if she fucked a plethora of people or pleasured herself with the newest sex toys, the end result would be the same. The feeling of being unfulfilled as all she could think about was Z.
Z, giggly and ecstatic as her dog licked his cheek. Z, warm and relaxed under the soft light of the bar. Z, annoyed and adorable as he lost their numbers game. Carmi wanted to love Z, be loved by Z, make love with Z, Z, Z, Z -
The glint of a shiny candy wrapper caught Carmi’s gaze, pulling her away from the depths of her memories. Great. Now she was kind of horny. Again . Back to square one. Crawling towards the strawberry bon-bon as it(ironically) laid near Z’s boots, Carmi slipped it into her jacket pocket. She’d make sure to throw it away when she’d return home. Or maybe she should find a trash bin here…? Carmi really didn’t want her dog to go looking for a forbidden treat that came with a trip to the vet. Knowing him, he wouldn’t even need to smell it. He'd just assume the young woman had something on her and start searching. Carmi blamed Z for that.
‘Okay, now I just need to… to…’ Carmi’s thoughts trailed off as she realized what position she was in. She was nearly touching the demon’s knees and past his thighs was his…
‘NO!’ Carmi mentally yelled at her brain. She wanted to force it back on track and never mention this day again. ‘ Stop it! We can’t be weird!’
But it was too late as her head had heard the name ‘Z’ and lost all ability to reason with logic. Carmi couldn’t get a good sight on his bulge from where she was, but it looked like it was on the larger size. What did he sound like when he was being pleasured? Carmi already found Z’s voice to be lovely, but she knew it would sound even better if he was whimpering from overstimulation. Was his cum more watery or was it thick and creamy? Oh, she hoped he cummed buckets. Carmi would be willing to bet money that Z giving her a nice and deep creampie would feel utterly amazing . Orgasming was the best part certainly, but Carmi liked to enjoy the tension and journey of reaching her high. Would the fiend be a selfish lover? She couldn’t imagine it, considering Z had been surprisingly so attentive to her needs. The hot, weighted feeling of her lust for Z sunk down the bottom of her stomach as she squeezed her aching thighs. For a single second, Carmi even wondered how he tasted …
Suddenly, as quick as a viper, Z’s tail wrapped itself around Carmi’s dry throat, pulling her closer to him. Despite its slim appearance, the thing was just as strong as any other part of his body, and it didn’t stop until her head was practically on one of Z’s thighs. He was already man spreading, so Carmi tried really hard not to think about the position she was in. 
Key word “tried.”
‘DO NOT LOOK AT HIS DICK PRINT CARMI.’ She was practically screaming in her head at this point, begging her brain to listen to her just this one time. ‘FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, DO NOT FUCKING LOOK AT IT. HE WILL NEVER LET US LIVE IT DOWN IF WE GET CAUGHT STARING.’   
Thankfully, Z grabbed Carmi's chin and forced her to look directly into his heated eyes. Oh how beautiful they were, she lovingly sighed in silence. Swirls of shimmering gold, crimson as red as rubies and a dash of violet beneath a mess of soft hair hypnotically entranced her, keeping Carmi hanging off of the demon’s every word.
“Do not,” Z growled, glaring down at the dark skinned woman as his tail began to curl around her throat. “Even think about those humans in my presence. Not your pathetic little friends, not your insignificant little ex, and definitely not that sniveling, annoying blue haired idiot.”    
Carmi could feel herself trembling, but not from fear. Oh, never from fear. But she wished that it was, for fear would be a far less shameful emotion to have at this moment.
‘Jesus, sweet Jesus,’ Carmi silently prayed to a god she knew would not listen. ‘Please, please, please, do not let this man find out how attractive his voice is. I’ll never hear the end of it.’
Carmi was so entranced by his voice, that it took her a second to register what Z had said. Instantly, whatever spell over her had broken and her jaw nearly dropped to the floor in shock.
“I’m not, and I’m borderline offended that you think that I would be thinking about that creep!” Carmi scoffed. She also wanted to roll her eyes, but she squashed the urge down. Honestly, she was more confused than anything. What on earth would Z have gotten the idea that the one she was thinking about was Alvin?
“Demon, remember?” Z tapped their horns, silver rings shining brightly. Carmi frowned, looking up at them, confusion swirling in her head. Why was Z bringing that up now? It wasn’t like it was hard to forget that he was a fiend from the literal pits of hell. What did that have to do with situation at all-
Oh. Oh.
Carmi felt heat flushing to her face for the second time that night. Z could have probably sensed how… excited she was getting underneath the table, which was extremely embarrassing. But that still didn’t answer the question of why Z mentioned her co-worker specifically . Was it something Carmi had said? She had mentioned a few things she thought were good about him, sure, but every other single time the guy was brought up, her distaste for him was clear as day. That was even if Carmi brought up Alvin at all, which she rarely ever did.     
“Z, Alvin is not the cause of this!” Carmi hissed. She could feel the blood rushing to her face as she tried to stutter out a response. “I-it’s…”
“Hmmm?” 
Her face was practically on fire at this point. Why wouldn’t she just spit out the truth? Carmi thought about it, confessing about… everything she had been feeling. The insides of Carmi’s guts churned as if they were the deep, oily waters of a terrifying storm. She did want him in that way, lord knows she couldn’t stop thinking about it. So why hadn’t she? Z was kind, he was funny, he was sweet… they were practically the perfect boyfriend, even if they loved to ramble on about arson. His many odd quirks just made him all the more charming. Carmi felt her heart let out an affectionate squeeze. She loved him. And insecurities be damned, she was going to show it.
In an instant, Carmi made up her mind. She was finally going to fuck Z.
Trying to calm herself before she fell into an anxiety fueled breakdown, Carmi looked straight at Z.  
Z stared at her.
She stared at Z.
The flat spade shaped tail began to lightly slap Carmi on the forehead and nose. 
“Hey-wait! Z, cut it ou- will you stop?!?” She spat out, her eyes closed as Z promptly ignored what she said. Without thinking, Carmi snapped her teeth forward and caught Z’s spade shaped tail in between her fangs. Immediately, Z let out a rough, pitchy gasp that ended in a grunt from the back of the throat, as if he was fighting the urge to moan fully. 
Carmi nearly dropped the tail in pure shock. The gravity of the situation dawned on the heavyset woman and a mixture of fear and arousal combining themselves as one, twisting and squirming as it resided in her stomach. Did she really just put his tail in her mouth? Z had told her(albeit it was under his breath) she could if she wanted to, and god she did. The idea of finally being able to see Z in such a state again only made her heart pound faster. 
“Aww, Dove . Do you need me to fill up your mouth that badly?” Z cooed, a beautiful red blush spreading upon his face. She was amazed that such a tiny action had such a profound effect on him. “If you’re truly that desperate, I can make sure that you put that sweet little tongue to good use.” 
“Yeah, I am.” Carmi bluntly replied. “Can I suck you off Z?”
It was Z’s turn to look dumbfounded once he realized that the woman was serious, clearly not expecting his teasing to work this time. It didn’t stop him from excitedly nodding his head though. Oh fuck, if a simple touch was enough to have her fighting the urge to ask the demon to feel her up with his large, warm hands, then seeing Z leap at the chance for a BJ nearly had her naked on the table with her legs spread from the entrance of the bar to the fire exit. Carmi had to fuck him. Right now.
The stem was nearly as thick as a finger, smooth like rubber, and pleasant against her tongue. Taking the feeling of Z’s hand cradling her head as a more intimate invitation to continue, Carmi lapped the tip in between her teeth. It pressed against her lips and the woman lovingly gave a very light kiss before allowing her lips to part, her tongue dragging it into her maw. Again, Z huffed out a long groan. Her mind spun into a daze. Slowly, gently, Carmi dragged the demon’s tail deeper into her hot mouth. She rubbed it against the roof of her mouth as she could feel it pulsating with Z’s quickening heartbeat. 
Flicking and lapping circles around the piece of flesh, Carmi made a show of sucking on it. The more the woman lavished the fiend’s tail with attention from her tongue, the more Z would let out delicious sounds that started to drive her insane as he thrusted his tail deeper until it hit the back of her throat. Hearing their breathy moans, no doubt enjoying the affection she was giving him, had caused Carmi to become bold enough to feel up his cock. 
Instantly, the woman could feel him harden underneath her touch, could see the swell of his cock straining against the fabric of his pants from her presence. Hot excitement flooded her stomach and she could feel drool pool into her mouth. Swallowing thickly, Carmi’s dark hand quickly unbuttoned his black jeans and once again she felt him stir beneath her touch. Feeling bolder by the second, Carmi’s mouth leaned forward to Z’s pants and slowly, carefully, began to unzip his pants with her mouth.
Finally, Z’s cock sprung free as he was already half-hard, nearly hitting her in the face. A circumcised penis that was much like his fingers, long, thick, and turned black with a red crown. Dribbling precum in her soft hands, Carmi noted that it curved up slightly, in a way that was designed to attack that sensitive spot.
Carmi also noted that it was stupidly fucking massive.
‘What the FUCK?’ Why the hell is he so damn BIG?!’ Carmi asked herself, an incredulous tone weaving itself in her internal dialogue. It wasn’t just the length, but the thickness of it too. Though she felt a spike of panic bolt through her body, Carmi’s outward expression did not visibly change. Could she really take Z’s cock…? Carmi thought back to the many, many toys of differing sizes and shapes hidden in her apartment. If she was horny enough with some good prepping… eh. She probably could. But in the mouth was a different ball game entirely. It wasn’t as if Carmi had been practicing how to take a massive cock down her throat just in case she had the opportunity to suck Z off.
Well.
Maybe she had… but that wasn’t the point! Blowing a dildo was much different than giving one to a person made of flesh and blood. How the fuck was she going to fit this thing in her mouth? She really wanted him to feel good too… Maybe if she had a few more weeks of training her throat underneath her belt, Carmi would be less hesitant.
‘Well… I’ve got to see this through. I’m not backing down now.’ Carmi thought to herself.  She was NOT going to go another day without dick. ‘I wanted to fuck Z, so I’m gonna fuck Z.’
Using just one hand and a whole bunch of lust filled courage, Carmi started to stroke him and palmed the demon’s cock as pre-cum dripped out, running in sticky ribbons alongside the veins of his shaft. Her cameo patterned off-shoulder dress had exposed her large chest, and the bottom of it had begun to ride up her thighs, revealing her wet panties. Even though the thought of Z shooting a nice and large load of hot cum onto her heated flesh made her hornier than she’d like to admit, Carmi did mean what she had said earlier. 
She always cleaned up any mess that she made.
Carmi slowly let her half-lidded eyes fall shut as she parted her plump lips so that she could kiss the head of Z’s hardening cock. 
Hearing the demon take a sharp intake of breath, she began to lovingly pepper small kisses all around the tip. Her steady wanting had quickly evolved into a lustful ache. Carmi wanted to take his hardened shaft in her mouth and feel him slide down her throat. How would it feel to have Z make her jaw ache and her dark eyes water? To feel the shake of his thighs, to hear his moans when he filled her mouth? The heavyset woman was very eager to find out. 
Once Carmi was sure that she had smooched every single bit of the fiend that she could see, she opened her mouth a little wider and sucked on his leaking tip. Rubbing her tongue across his sensitive head, Carmi could hear a stuttering gasp once again catch in Z’s throat. Her tongue licked a hot stripe over their slit as her dark hands began to pump his cock.  
“Thaaaat’s it Dove.” Z rasped out. The larger woman could feel the hand cradling her head tense tightly, sharp nails touching her scalp. “Go on, open up your throat for me.”
Resuming her task with renewed vigor, the eager woman began to run her hot tongue all over his throbbing shaft, licking and slurping at his cock. Then she began to sweep with long moist strokes as she sped up her hands. Lavishing his dick with eager attention, the more effort Carmi put into her blowjob, the hungrier she became. While she was excited for the demon to shoot cum in her mouth, Carmi was in no real hurry as she was pleasantly enjoying the experience of sucking Z off underneath the table.
“Aww, look at you go.” Z practically cooed through the breathless groans of pleasure. ”Such a good human. My good human.”
The excitement from having Z praise her had her body shivering from the anticipation, and her mouth felt just as hot as her clit. She focused on the heat of his stomach, the faint taste of his skin. The scent of smoke and whiskey to spur her on. Pressing her lips against the hairy base of his shaft, the woman could feel his cock oozing precum all the way down her hungry throat and Carmi moaned, the vibrations of her muffled cries had Z becoming louder, groaning in pleasure. His warm hands reached out to her face and stroked it tenderly, lovingly , as Carmi looked up at him, tears welling up from her dark eyes.
“Fuck…! Your mouth feels so damn good sweetheart.” Z was practically panting at this point. “You’re trying so hard to get me all the way down…”
At this point, Z had taken a more… active role. Grabbing her head to guide her mouth on his cock, Carmi simply followed the demon’s lead, licking and sucking as they tangled their claws in her muti-colored hair. Slowly and steadily, Z began to guide her head up and down until he was gently face fucking her, using Carmi’s mouth as nothing more than a glorified fleshlight.
And something about that turned her the hell on.
Carmi wanted Z to use her to reach his own orgasm. She wanted him to throw his head back and shamelessly moan as he emptied himself in her mouth. But most of all, Carmi wanted Z to stroke her face in the same loving manner he had done so before, all while staring down at her with the loveliest pair of heated eyes she had ever seen.     
Carmi shuttered, waves of pure lust raced through her heated body as Z began to speed up his pace. His thrusting became more erratic and wild, body tensing up and the woman trembled in anticipation as much as the demon did. Z’s release was rapidly approaching and she couldn’t wait to finally taste him. Following his lead, Carmi began to pump and suck to match his tempo, her soft lips were slick with his pre-cum, making it easy for her to glide them up and down his shaft.
Z suddenly let out a choked curse as ropes of hot cum hit the back of her throat, Carmi stiffened and pushed down the urge to gag. As her lover continued to thrust his dick into her mouth, Carmi kept sucking voraciously as she gulped down everything their body provided. There was so much more than the woman expected, almost too much. But when the spurting seemed to slowly die down, Carmi practically nursed on the demon’s cock, milking out every last drop of their cum as used her hands to stroke his shaft.
She pulled her mouth away and his black and red cockhead bobbed up and down before her face. Carmi licked her lips and opened her mouth. She wanted to show him how she had drunk every single drop. 
“Did I do a good job?” Carmi asked with a slur in her voice, drunk on the taste of him. Of Z.
The demon was practically caressing her face. She leaned into his loving touch as Z pulled her up. Carmi had become entranced by the way their bodies moved so smoothly in sync. Placing one knee on each side of his legs, the woman slid on top of Z and sat herself snuggly onto his lap, right where she belonged. Through dark, half-lidded eyes, Carmi spread her thighs to encourage Z to have access. Her body was filled with both shame and arousal, and eager for more of his touch.
But Z had never felt shameful and wasn’t going to now, especially with how his human was practically moaning in his lap. Z grabbed her ass and guided Carmi flush against them, her chest to their and her legs parted just enough to straddle their hips. Pulling her in close, their slick tongues slid against each other, hot and insistent, before disappearing into the other’s mouth in a heated french kiss. Z bucked upward against her covered entrance, grinding their throbbing cock against the spot that was dripping wet.  
Carmi moaned into the kiss as she felt a rippling thrill run down through her belly and swirled in waves in her crotch. She could feel her engorged clit. The woman pitifully writhed her body in sync with Z’s, their hips moving against each other, allowing her to relish in the delicious friction. The persistent wet sounds of lips and tongues had left her pussy throbbing with desire and brain a scrambled mess. But she wanted more, no, she needed more.
“Z, I need you… Please?” Carmi tried to whimper as softly as she could. Squeezing Z’s hand before she intertwined with her own(or tried to anyway. She loved how small she felt when her body was near his), Carmi guided it between her breasts where the demon could feel her pulsating heart, slid it down below her quivering belly, and didn’t stop until his hot, black tipped hand was cupping her already dripping slit.
“After all this, of course you're soaked.” Z retorted. The demon didn't hesitate for a second as he pressed two fingers against Carmi’s swollen clit. “Nothing gets you off like being my personal little cum dump, hmmm?”
A jolt of pleasure shot through her body as the demon rubbed her heated mound with their fingers and restless movements, bringing forth a delicious, pulsing warmth into existence. Her body felt empty, as if she wanted something to plunge deep inside her core. As if the demon could read her mind, Carmi could feel Z’s hot fingers sliding down from her clit to the entrance of her hole, rubbing and teasing it before sinking two thin but long fingers in. Her juices were so plentiful that Z’s fingers slid in with ease. The palm of his hand slammed against her pussy, with juices dripping down onto his palm with each thrust.
Soft, pliant, and imbued with a sense of lust and desperation, the two kissed the other over and over with growing wetness and force. Breaking one of their heated kiss left Carmi whining at the loss of contact. Z kept one large and heated hand on her thick waist with the other fingerbanging her. The demon, forward as ever, left an open mouthed kiss to her collarbone and began to suck, most likely intending to leave a bruise. Carmi let out another breathy sigh.
“Z… Can we go back to your place…?” Carmi whispered in his ear, praying that she wouldn’t have to have their first time together on a bar table. Not because she was embarrassed, but more so the thing looked uncomfortable to get fucked on. “I don’t want anyone else to see me like this except you.” She trailed her lips on the edge of his helix before biting it for good measure.
Z muttered a “c’mere” underneath their breath as they grabbed her thighs and picked her up like she weighed nothing, holding her in a way that kept her legs spread wide. Despite not wanting to have a full-blown fucking session in the bar, Carmi couldn’t help herself and squeezed her legs, grinding her clit onto him. She could hear Z grunt in her ear. And for a single moment Carmi felt like she was completely weightless, clinging tightly onto her boyfriend for support as there was an inky blackness that surrounded them- 
The pair of lovers landed softly onto Z’s bed.
There was unmistakable lust in every movement, every flinch, every twitch to their bodies. She moaned and pressed into him more. No matter how close the demon was, would it ever be enough? Carmi wanted to not only hold Z, but to have him bind himself to her soul. The woman wanted to have them intertwine themselves so intensely that they could not ever part, not without losing something integral.
When it was clear he was going to kiss her once more, Carmi didn’t resist. Kissing him back just as passionately, Carmi could barely remember the two throwing their clothes off. Every time they broke apart so Carmi could intake air, another piece of clothing would haphazardly be thrown to the side. She did spot the demon pocketing her thoroughly soaked panties which drove her wild. She’d have to remember to see which ones Z liked the best.
It didn’t take long for the lovers to be completely naked. A tantalizing combination of excitement and arousal pumped through her body. It was really happening, was she really about to have sex with her boyfriend? Carmi didn’t know and for once in her life, she didn’t care either. All Z had to do was lovingly stroke her face and whisper her name with that honey sweet voice of his, and she would fold in an instant. Carmi wanted to feel him, to taste him. To experience the dizzying rollercoaster that was Z with all of his ups and downs.
Carmi’s world shrank to just Z’s embrace as once again, their lips found each other, soft, pliant, and imbued with a sense of lust and desperation. Z eagerly ran his tongue over Carmi’s mouth and vice versa as the two lovers melted into a puddle of needy lust. Moving purely on instinct, Carmi allowed the demon to wrap his warm arms around her soft body and guide her down into the mattress, deepening the kiss while his hand roamed down her arching back. She hooked her thick legs around his hips and locked her ankles, pushing and grinding her crotch against his. He was already rock hard. Carmi could feel it.
‘More.’ Carmi wanted to beg him, her own mind clouded by a sexual fog. Months of pent-up lust had caught flame and was now threatening to boil over. ‘Give me more…!’
But Carmi couldn’t talk. Z was tasting her tongue, licking her lips, and drinking in all of the tiny sounds of pleasure she mewled out. Carmi’s long, black nails dug into his muscular shoulders, threatening to draw blood. They were in their own world and Carmi never wanted to leave it.
Z began to move from her plump lips to her exposed neck, alternating between kisses and nips all the way down until he reached her breasts. He rolled his tongue around them, teasing and sucking the tip of her nipples. They hardened inside his mouth and Z pinched the other one with his finger as Carmi cried out his name again in excitement. Sinking lower, the demon left a trail of kisses and sharp nips down her stomach until he left one directly above her smoldering mound. As Z parted her pillowy thighs, they lowered their head and hungrily gazed down at her leaking slit. Carmi could feel the air as it was sucked in by Z.
Was he… was he smelling her?
He groaned and kept his nose buried against her soaping entrance for a few more moments before he apparently found what he was looking for. Pulling at her dripping folds, the demon spread her pussy wide open with his black tipped fingers, revealing the vulnerable flesh of her throbbing clit. Carmi was amazed at how soft the demon’s lips were as she received a tender kiss to her overheated flesh and then a rough lick with the flat of his tongue that had left her whining for more. 
She was starting to really squirm at this point. Trying her best to keep her eyes on the demon feasting between her legs, Carmi involuntarily throwed her head back in pure, cardinal bliss with a full-throated moan when Z gave her throbbing bud a nice, rough lick. Just like Carmi had suspected, Z felt much better than most of the toys she owned. If this was how good sex felt when they were just using his tongue, Carmi couldn’t wait for the main course.
“S-Shit…! Oh God, Z, your tongue …” She panted out.
Carmi thighs clamped around his head as Z continued their assault.
She grinded herself against his face, shamelessly thrusting into his hot mouth. Z switched between giving Carmi fast attention to her engorged bud, and then slowly fucking her with his dexterous tongue in her clenching hole. The demon fervently drunk up any juices Carmi’s body provided, greedily slurping up every single drop like it was the most exquisite thing he had ever tasted. The sounds were lewd and filthy, and did nothing but bring her closer to the edge.
‘Fuck.’ Carmi cursed at Z in her head. The fiend’s oral was making her release noises that no one had made her cry out before. ‘Stupid demon, with his stupid good-looks and his stupidly long tongue-’
“Ahhha-AH!” Carmi’s body curled at the sudden onslaught of pleasure. It seemed that Z’s tongue had found that oh-so-sensitive spot that resided deep within her cunt. She wrapped one hand around one of his red tipped horns and fisted a handful of the demon’s soft locks with the other, as if to gain a sense of control she knew she didn’t have. As she clung onto his horns with her fingers roughly tangled in his wild locks, her hips began to pump. The young woman was quivering and drenching her lover’s maw, grinding her crotch against Z’s hot mouth. 
“Z-Z ! Sl-Ah, AH! Slow down! PLEASE!” Carmi finally managed to let out a high-pitched panting wheeze, but Z made no move to listen to her request. In fact, the demon began to eat her out even faster, devouring her with a vigor unmatched from any of her previous lovers. The woman began to wither and buck to escape the unrelenting pleasure but Z firmly held her in place no matter how hard she tried to escape his grasp. He held on to her hips as she bucked against him, back arching uncontrollably. She continued to let out a mixture of whimpers, moans and pleads that ended in tear-streaked crying as Carmi struggled to keep her head raised enough to watch Z practically make out with her sopping wet mound. Carmi could feel his hot, forked tongue abusing her g-spot, thrusting his tongue in and out of his tight slit, making her clench and tremble in Z’s mouth. She could feel her orgasm approaching closer and closer until the demon suddenly stopped the oral assault on her body.
“Hu-wha..?”  
“You want to tell me who was the one who had you so flustered, Dove?” Z asked with a smirk, but there was no mirth within his eyes. Carmi nearly hit the roof. Was he really asking this now? Couldn’t he have at least finished eating his plate before giving her a random interrogation? 
“I already told you Z, I-I wasn’t thinking about anyone!” Carmi tried to protest, attempting to close her legs. Z forced her dark thighs apart with ease, as they were much stronger than a human could ever hope to be. Carmi hated to admit to herself how hot it was that he could manhandle her like that.
“It’s no use lying to me Dove.” He replied in a singsong voice. Carmi did NOT feel like explaining how Z’s voice nearly made her bust a nut in the bar. The fiend already had so much power over her, they didn't need anymore ammo to bully her with. Besides, what if he found it more creepy than flattering?
“I-I wasn’t thinking about anyone you s-should worry a-about..!” It was technically the truth. But Carmi could see that her vague answer did nothing to placate her lover.
“Fine Dove. If it’s a game you want, it’s a game you’ll get.” Z said, their smirk turned into a downright sadistic grin, their smile showing off his dangerously sharp teeth. Carmi didn’t think she liked where this was going. “Let’s see how long you can last until you’re begging me to let you cum.”  
And he was true to his word. Twice more did Z bring her close to the edge, and twice more did Z deny Carmi release. By the end of his third denial, Carmi had been reduced to a teary, sweaty mess. This was no longer a dream. This was a nightmare.
“Do you want to be a good girl and give me an answer?” Z smugly asked like the little fucking shit he was. This was the guy who had a claim of her mind, body and soul?
“Not. Happening.” Carmi gritted out through clenched teeth.  
Seemingly deciding to change tactics, Z began to push Carmi’s legs closer to her chest, bending her in-half until she felt like a pretzel. 
“I could devour you whole,” Z says gently, and Carmi could feel the heat of his words sinking into her bending body. “And I'd make it so good for you. Won't you let me, sweetheart? You just need to tell me the truth.”
Carmi cursed underneath her breath as she shook her head, hips involuntarily jerking into his touch. Fuck, should she just tell them? She wanted to, but the fear of rejection wrapped their hands around her throat and slicened her. It’d be fine right? Z had to give in at some point.
His fat tip drooled pre-cum and he took it one hand to slap it against Carmi’s already sensitive mound. She flinched at the feeling. The fiend nudged his cock against her throbbing clit once, twice, gathering her leaking juices before dragging it down to the very spot where he could have sunken himself into her warmth.
“Fuck, you're so wet.” Z groaned as they lined themselves up against her entrance. Carmi could feel him using the head of his shaft to part her labia. “When I rub the head of my cock along your slit, it's completely drenched. I bet I could just slide it right in-”
Carmi could feel the stretch, she could feel every throb, every vein, all his thickness filling her. Even her cunt started to squeeze his cock’s head like it was made for this and this alone. But before Z could penetrate her too deep, give her something that she could clench down on, Z would pull himself out.
“Why did you pull out?” Carmi breathlessly whined. “You felt so good …” Even though Z’s hardened cock was resting on her throbbing mound, She could swear she felt it twitch as a response to the question. The heat of their combined lust made her head spin. Holy shit, she was so sensitive that Carmi couldn’t tell if she was going to pass out or cum so hard that she would see heaven. She was leaning towards the former. Z must have sensed that, as he delivered a sharp bite to the back of her leg, determined to keep his human’s attention on them. The nip wasn’t necessarily painful. No, all it did was bring forth a different type of feeling within her body. 
Z wasn’t far enough inside to be able to properly fuck Carmi yet, he’d start to move his hips, giving shallow thrusts as he pulled out slightly and sank himself right back in. The demon was only using his thick cockhead to stimulate her for now, giving her a taste of what she could have if Carmi gave into their demands. And much like receiving a sip of water while abandoned in a desert, the feeling had only been a brief moment of pleasure that, once passed, only left the woman craving more for more. However, with the combination of the fiend’s wandering hands, Carmi was sure that this was the closest she’d been to Hell. Z’s hands, large enough to greedily grab at her breast, pinching and twisting them. The woman wanted to break down in tears, everything felt simultaneously too much and not enough. Z gave her pleasure but never enough to satisfy her, to give her release from the torture of being denied another toe-curling orgasm. Z continued their teasing assault for what felt like hours , until Carmi finally cried out in defeat. 
“It was you!” 
Immediately, the woman could feel Z’s hands freeze up. She could feel the blood rushing to her face as Carmi  tried to remember how to use her mouth and hurriedly spit out an explanation. 
“It’s just that your voice sounds so nice and sometimes when I hear it, I start to think about you saying certain things and I know it’s weird, but sometimes you sound territorial and it, you, sound so good and I…” Her voice got smaller and smaller with each word when she realized what she had confessed to the demon who’s cock was still inside her. “I really… like… hearing it…”
Silence. That was all Carmi heard.
Instantly, she felt a freezing pit drop into her stomach. Holy hell, she fucked up. Oh, she fucked up bad. Why did she say that? Shit. Shit. Shit . Oh, this was it. Z was gonna call her a creepy weirdo, they would never talk to her again and she be left alone-
“You… like my voice…?” Z asked incredulously.
Carmi hesitantly removed her dark hands from her face, peaking at them to see the fiend with his jaw dropped. Z had looked completely gob smacked, as if he would have never in a million years guessed that it was his voice that got her hot and heavy back in the bar. Carmi nodded. 
“Yeah… But that’s not it. Every single time you flirt, or when you show that I can trust you , or e-even when you smile…” Carmi practically murmured. This felt too intense, too intimate , confessing her feelings like this. “Every single part of you drives me insane, Z. Is that really so hard to believe…?” 
“I could feel you getting anxious every time I tried to initiate things, so I assumed that you were too scared of me. Besides,” Z shrugged as if it was the most natural thing in the world. “Who would ever trust a demon? You’d have to be insane.” 
“I don’t trust other demons. I trust you Z.” She confessed. She had finally spilled everything out and Carmi could feel her face grow hot from not only being exposed physically, but emotionally as well. Oh God, she was rambling again. “And like you. Like, a lot. A concerning amount even-”
Z cut her off with a deep kiss. Immediately, whatever thoughts plagued her mind dissipated when their lips touched. Carmi looked at him with a dazed, lovesick expression as Z pushed her onto her back. How was he always able to calm her down so easily…? Was this what it was like to be in love?                                                                                                        
“Hmm…? Is that right? My voice alone is all it takes for my human to get all worked up…” Once again, Carmi could feel the heat behind his words, the feeling running down her spine and making her walls twitch. 
“Ugh, stop!” Carmi threw a pillow over her head. She wasn’t in love anymore. She was going to strangle him with her bare hands instead. “I knew you were gonna be like this!”
“Stop? How can I?” Z once again grabbed her, their lips meeting once again. She practically moaned as her lover slid his tongue against hers, feeling a rush of pleasure pump throughout her body. There were so many things Carmi wanted Z to do to her, and she to him . “Especially with the way your body is reacting .”
“Z…” The intimate kisses had riled her up all over again. She couldn’t and wouldn’t deny anymore. She was willing to beg for it at this point, shame and insecurities be damned. “Please…!”
“Go on,” Z purred as his tail swissed. His voice had switched from that of a lover to one of a predator that has caught its prey, playing with it to indulge their own sick desires. The cock inside her responded immediately with another pulse. Carmi could feel it. Was Z…  was he fucking getting excited about hearing her beg for it? For him? “All you have to do is ask. Nicely. ”
Her pussy was like a smoldering ember between her pillowy thighs and Carmi nearly let out a sob, tears practically streaming down her face. “Please, please, please fuck me Z. I need to feel you.”
Carmi winced as her lover licked the falling tears from her cheeks as if they were droplets of an expensive spiced wine. Satisfied with her desperate pleads, her lover crawled back on top of her, their combined body weight sinking her into the mattress. The woman could feel her lover kissing her face and neck, sucking on the bite marks they'd left earlier. While they would disappear by the morning, Z would not. Sharp nails sunk into his arms as her boyfriend pushed himself deeper and they let out a moan, and grunt mixed into one. Her heated walls tightened around him reflexively, and she waited for the rest of that delicious stretch.
“Look at you, taking me like you were born for it.” His thrusts were still somewhat shallow, Carmi knew she wasn't taking him all the way, not yet. But her twitching hole was starting to adjust itself to accommodate the great bulk of his shaft as Z pushed himself in again and managed to slowly fuck in and out of her eager entrance. “And to think you’ve wanted this the entire time. You little tease.”
Z’s cock was much thicker than his tongue, less flexible but it filled her up so much better, a sturdy hardness that she could finally clench around so nicely. Carmi almost sobbed as Z withdrew, pulling his long, delicious cock almost completely out. He returned immediately when she whined from the loss. Z felt so good , so warm and so, so big … he was fulfilling her entirely, every bit of Carmi that was empty, every little space that needed his heat was now his and stuffed to the brim.  
“I'm not some- I wasn’t-!" Carmi’s already weak argument ended in a loud gasp as Z reminded her who she belonged to with another good, deep thrust.
“Fuck… I can feel you tightening up, you’re- oh hells, trying to suck me in deeper-”
“Z-Z… ohgod oh fuck–!” Carmi shut her eyes from the intense pleasure, but Z was having none of it. He sunk his dagger like fangs into her leg once again, making sure she was watching his every move.
“Don't you dare look away sweetheart. Keep your eyes on me, just like that…” Carmi shuttered from a mixture of the pleasure of finally being fucked. Z’s honey sweet voice as he mumbled obscenities into her ears, reveling in her tightness, and the way her body fit so perfectly against his. Carmi gasped and cried out from his sudden depth as his cock rutted against a spot that left her absolutely writhing . “I want to see your face when I make you cum.”
Her body felt so weak, twitching, vulnerable and at the mercy to whatever the fiend desired. She tried in vain to hold back her whimpers, but they slipped out of her throat anyway, in a long and constant stream of cries that grew louder and more desperate as Z continued to fuck her. Carmi had tried to pull away from the demon, but she was in no position to do so. She could sense his hungry gaze as Z leaned in close, grinding his hips against hers. Fuck, Carmi could feel every single inch of his throbbing cock inside her spasming walls.
“Z-Z, I c-can’t…!”
“Oh, no, no Dove. You can. I barely even need to grab your hips, your body wouldn't let me go if I tried…” His tail began to rub on her engorged clit and Carmi gave another frantic series of moans from the stimulation. She was practically drowning in pleasure. “Look how badly you want this, sweetheart. Go on, squeeze me tighter. Thaaat’s it Carmi. Good girl.”
Carmi, for her part, could scarcely formulate a coherent thought aside from ‘yes, yes, yes…!’ . She'd put up so many walls, and having them all crumble at once was more than she could really process. She'd been terrified of ruining her relationship with Z, but now, she wanted to kick herself for not giving in and confessing how she felt sooner. Her lover rocked her back to the edge once more. Now Z was fucking his whole massive cock into her pussy with every lunge, burying the shaft so deep that his balls were slapping on her ass. Letting out high pitched whimpers as Z slid his painfully hard cock against a dangerously tender spot, Carmi genuinely couldn’t tell if his loud moaning made the experience better or worse. Z didn’t even try to be quiet, and it was nearly driving her to insanity.
Carmi squealed, breaking away from the kiss, as Z started to fuck Carmi with a frenzy that he’d held back until that moment, spurred on by her cries. The pressure was increasing, more and more.
“Oh Z-FUCK! I’m, I’m…!”
Carmi didn’t even have the chance to prepare herself before her orgasm hit her, juices gushing from her soaked pussy, coating Z in her arousal. Her back arched as her body spasmed while Z continued to fuck Carmi through her high for as long as it lasted. Her pulsating cunt slowly eased itself, leaving behind an overwhelming sensation that was strong enough to cause her legs to twitch. Z could feel her velvety walls clench around him as Carmi’s orgasm left her cunt drooling and pulsing with desire.
Even though she was sensitive from cumming, Z still rutted his fat cock in the whimpering woman. The feeling made her repeatedly squeal with every thrust with desire, surprise, even a little sting of pain. Carmi let out a particularly loud gasping wail when she felt for the first time a rush of hot, thick cum deep inside her. The pleasure was intense and overwhelming as the demon continued thrusted with spurt after spurt of hot cum, moaning as he practically emptied himself in her cunt. Once he was finished, she could see how the demon’s body trembled with the aftershocks of his release, still feeling the remnants of pleasure that washed over them.
Carmi wiggled her shaking legs from under Z and wrapped them around his chest. Maybe it was due to the orgasm he had just had, or maybe he was simply curious on what Carmi planned to do. Either way of thinking led to the same result. With Carmi straddling the demon underneath her. An excitement began to grow in her and she shifted her position so that the growing bulge pressed into her leaking entrance.
“Do you really not know what you do to me…?” Carmi grabbed hold of the length of his cock and rubbed her freshly filled pussy, teasing him. The cock had already become hard again, the head of it entering her. Z was panting at this point, more precum oozing from the tip to lubricate her already wet hole as Carmi began to slowly drop her full weight into his lap, enjoying the sensation of grinding his cock inside her. Taking in a deep breath, the woman fully sank onto him, feeling Z’s pulsating cock inside her once more. She planted her soft hands firmly on his toned torso to help steady her as she huffed and moaned. 
“W-why would I even think about anyone else?” She raised herself up until only his sensitive, hard tip rubbed against her heat and then slammed herself down hard once more.
“Ah!  Ahn!  Ahh-mphf!”  Carmi gasped and huffed delightedly each time she slammed her wide hips down. She could feel her pussy clamp down on Z, trying to keep the demon inside her as all she could do was moan, pant, and cry. The emotions that weld up inside of Carmi were so intense, that it was dizzying. She felt almost lightheaded, with nothing but the feeling of Z’s pulsating cock keeping her grounded. Fuck, why had she been holding back all this time?
“How can I-ngh! Even think of fucking any-Ah… Ah! One else?” Carmi could barely whine out her question. She was going to pound Z into the mattress and milk him for all he was worth, even if it was the last thing she was going to do. “All I think about is you , Z!”
Carmi’s hips began to ride Z’s cock in a frantic, almost frenzied pace and she could hear the absolutely filthy noises their bodies made together, a reminder of just how much Carmi desperately wanted to feel Z’s cum inside her body once more. The sounds of her pleasure reverberating through the room as she was riding him so hard that the bed bounced alongside her. From her plump lips began to spill every single lustful and downright depraved thought she had about the demon in the past few weeks. She professed how handsome he was, how much she desired him, and how much she couldn’t stop thinking about him. She couldn’t help nor even stop herself. It was as if her body had a mind of its own and decided that a confession of her sinful desires while bouncing on Z’s cock was the best course of action.   
“When we were in that bar,” Carmi dragged her sharp nail on his chest, tracing the tattooed sigil and giving Z a devious smile. She really wanted to savor the feeling of the demon’s twitching cock inside her. Her cunt was aching and sensitive, but she didn’t care as Carmi was overcome by the freedom of her giving into her lust. She could cry out Z’s name, could whimper for his cock, could thrash and moan and sob and Carmi wanted to. God, she fucking wanted to. “All I could think about was how I wanted you to fuck me properly until I was stretched out, aching, and sore.”
Before Carmi would spill out anymore of her desires, bare anymore of her soul to him, Z had stuffed his neglected tail in her rambling mouth. She had bitten down on it. Hard.
Carmi immediately wanted to stop and check on the demon to make sure he wasn’t seriously hurt once she realized what she had done. Z may have been an immortal demon that could barely register pain, but Carmi could never forgive herself if she had harmed her lover, accident or not.
She would have done that, had Z not given out the most vocal and sluttiest moan Carmi had ever heard in her life, as he arched his back in pure, cardinal ecstasy.
“Ngh, that feels so good! Do that again, Dove! Harder! ”
Z began to loudly beg and whimper for her, stuttering Carmi’s name in an incoherent babble as they furiously pumped their hips to meet her own brutal pace. His shaft glided in and out of her sweet cunt easily due to the thick load he’d already flooded her with. The louder and more desperate Z got, the more times she would simply stop and squeeze his throbbing cock with her velvety walls, denying him release as the demon had done to her. She wanted to see him weak and whimpering. That would be a lovely sight to behold. 
“Ahh f-fuck Dove! Keep riding me like that! ”
“I c-can’t stop, oh fuck, you feel so–!” Carmi felt the tingling sensation in her lower stomach. Z’s thick, creamy load once again flooded her cunt, and Carmi let out a pitiful, full body keen at the feeling of being so full, pumped so completely. Perverted sounds of pleasure filled the room as the two lovers rode out their collective orgasms together in a scene that was as passionate as it was deprived. Finally, when the last spasm from his cock died out, Z let out a low moan and went into a full body shudder.
By the time she was done riding him, Carmi was unable to do anything but lay upon his warm chest, feeling limp and satisfied as she listened to his racing heartbeat. Her mound still tingled in the aftermath of her climax. She could feel Z’s cum drip sluggishly out of her abused hole and down her thigh. Carmi was exhausted, but also happy and confusingly, dizzyingly in love.
‘I could stay like this forever.’ She thought to herself as she nuzzled the crook of Z’s neck. She breathed in his scent. ‘I wouldn’t mind it. Not one bit.’ The steady beating of Z’s heart, the feel of his caring embrace and snuggling into the warmth the demon’s body provided… Yes, Carmi could stay like this forever and she wouldn’t have blinked an eye. 
But unfortunately, the world had never been kind to Carmi and wasn’t going to start now.
The dark-skinned woman let out an embarrassingly loud and weird sounding yelp as she suddenly found herself on her back. Before Carmi even had a chance to make sense of what was happening, Z was already climbing on top of her body, spreading her legs and looking down at her sweating and flustered form. Though she could not see his eyes, Carmi could feel the heat of their gaze trail hungerly across her body. 
“Uhh… Z?” She nervously giggled, wondering what was going on. “What are you…?”
“Oh, I’m going to make sure that I fulfill every single one of your fantasies tonight to make up for lost time.” Carmi stared up at the demonic entity between her thighs. She could already tell based upon his excited, almost manic smile and unhinged personality, that Z was not kidding.
“Don’t worry Dove,” They practically purred, a toothy grin spreading across their face. Z settled themselves right in between Carmi’s legs, hiking her warm, soft thighs around his waist. “I’ll fuck you until you can’t remember how to speak, and I’ll keep fucking you until you pass out. Even then, I won't stop. I’m not one to get tired easily , after all,”
Z pressed such a gentle and deceptively innocent kiss on her mouth, that it made Carmi instantly relax and nearly forget the position she was(and going to be) in.
“Oh, me and my big, stupid, horny mouth.’ Carmi thought, already resigning herself to her fate. ‘Well, it was nice being able to walk when I could...’
27 notes · View notes
karatekels · 2 months
Text
Party Favours
This fic is a belated birthday request for @cortmac1989 (sorry for the wait!) who wanted our favourite silver fox to sweep her off her feet on her birthday. Happy belated, and I hope you enjoy!
TW: oral sex (male and female receiving); bondage; graphic sex; foodplay; teasing; overstimulation
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Party Favours
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Terry’s POV:
“I told you I didn’t like to make a big deal about my birthday, Terry!” you pout at him in his office after the day’s lesson had concluded, your arms crossed over your chest. “That’s why I never told you when it was!”
It was adorable, really, how you thought you could keep things from him. Even if he didn’t have access to your personal information from your registration at the dojo, it would be all too easy for him to learn anything and everything he wanted to know about you. And he had, months ago, before you’d started dating.
“Did I make it a big deal?” he counters, staring down at your growing frustration with amusement. All he’d done initially was announce to the class that the rest of the week’s sessions with him were being cancelled; it wasn’t his fault that Williams had asked why. And even then, he’d only said that he would be celebrating your birthday with you for the next few days.
He hadn’t even gone into any specifics, such as the fact that you’ll ideally be too boneless to leave the bedroom by the time he’s done celebrating you tonight. And he wouldn’t dare leave you to your own devices in such a state just to do something as menial as teach a class.
“They’re going to talk about it, Terry; they always talk whenever our relationship is brought up!”
“Who’s talking?” he demands, more than willing to dismiss anyone that was causing you distress. You immediately move to deescalate, reaching out to stroke his arm soothingly.
“They aren’t saying anything wrong, love. I can’t blame them for gossiping; we’re quite the bundle of taboos between the teacher-student dynamic and our age difference… plus, from what I’ve heard, none of them have seen you in love before.”
“That’s because I hadn’t been in love before,” he says in a fierce whisper, pulling you firmly against him. You tilt your head up to give him a shy smile.
“I’m not uncomfortable with them knowing about us or anything, but I don’t want them thinking you’re giving me any sort of special treatment.”
“Firmer discipline, then?” he teases, tightening his hold on you. You start to giggle nervously before biting your lip, clearly becoming concerned that he wasn’t joking. And while there is a deliciousness to the thought of claiming you as his in front of your peers, he is far too possessive to let anyone else see you in a sexual manner.
“Only if you really think I deserve it, Sensei,” you reply huskily, batting your eyelashes up at him, and he can’t contain the deep growl emanating from the back of his throat. Bowing his head, he captures your lips in a passionate kiss, taking care to explore every corner of your mouth with his tongue.
“Fortunately for you, the Birthday Girl can do no wrong today,” he purrs once he’s let you up for air, cradling your face reverently in his hands. You always felt so delicate like this, no matter how strong he knew you were…
“No?” you ask, arching an eyebrow at him coyly. “I have immunity today, huh? I wonder what I should do with it…”
The devious smirk you give him has his cock twitching against his thigh.
“I know we have a rule about not fooling around in the dojo, Sensei, but I was hoping we could make a deal,” you trail off, your fingers toying with his obi. “No big birthday plans for me, and in exchange I’ll give you something I know you’ve wanted for awhile.”
He tries to appear unaffected, but he can’t help the way his grip tightens on your chin at the implications. Christ, he’s wanted to have you in his office for the better part of a year now, but you’d always firmly drawn a line in the sand. He usually agreed with the logic… when he wasn’t tempted, as he is now.
“Y/N…” he murmurs your name in a strained voice. “I want to spoil you, the way you deserve…”
“You still can,” you reassure him with a casual shrug. “As long as it’s just the two of us. Besides, don’t you want me all to yourself?”
He hesitates, mentally calculating the work he’ll have to do to cancel the more elaborate of his public plans for you. He does want to give you everything he feels you deserve, but perhaps more time was needed for you to warm you up to the limelight.
“You’re all I want, Terry Silver. Aren’t you going to give me what I want on my birthday?” you pout, gazing up at him with the most innocent eyes you can muster.
You’re really turning into a fucking brat.
It only gets him harder.
“As you wish, my dear. Are there any other demands, Your Majesty?” he says earnestly. He’ll encourage you asking him for things at every opportunity; all he wants is for you to depend on him, so that he can show just how reliable he can be.
“Just try to treat me like you do every other student when we’re here, okay?” you ask, untying the obi nimbly, your eyes locked with his. “After what’s about to happen, that is,” you add with a flirty smile, pushing him by the hips to lean up against his desk. God, what you do to him…
“I’ll do you no more favours in this dojo,” he promises with a growl as you lower yourself to your knees before him. Tangling his fingers in your hair, he mentally braces himself to memorize every detail of this fantasy about to come to life. “Now, get to work.”
Thanking his past self for his foresight in asking the other sensei to clear the building immediately after the lesson, he sets about savouring the benefits of compromise.
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Later that night…
Reader’s POV:
Terry is disappointingly not waiting in the back of the car for you when Larry the chauffeur calls for you later that night, passing on Terry’s apology and saying that he was busy finalizing some last-minute plans for the evening. You nibble on your bottom lip on the ride to dinner, feeling anxious and hoping that you haven’t come off as ungrateful or ruined a bunch of plans that Terry had in store for the evening.
But when the hostess leads you up through the restaurant to a private rooftop patio half an hour later, Terry only seems happy to see you, wrapping you up in a tight embrace as soon as the other woman has retreated down the stairs.
“You look spectacular, my love,” he compliments you in a husky voice, resting his forehead on yours. “I hope that this is a private enough setting for you, my princess.”
You roll your eyes playfully at his teasing before taking a moment to look around. As always, you tended to neglect your surroundings whenever Terry was in the room.
The terrace is decorated with fairy lights and candles that give off the perfect amount of light against the rapidly darkening evening sky, with plants decorating the railings and hung from the ceiling, their flowers giving off a light, exotic fragrance. It’s a warm evening in Los Angeles, but there is a pleasant cool breeze that plays with the loose tendrils of both yours and Terry’s hair. You’re high enough in the air that the typical noise of the city is drowned out, and smooth jazz quietly plays from a sound system you can’t locate.
But most importantly, it’s just the two of you, Terry dressed comfortably, the way he did when he entertained at his home, and that means more to you than anything.
“It’s perfect, Terry,” you tell him sincerely, beaming up at him with pure joy. It wasn’t easy to convince the man you loved to see things your way, especially when it came to your preference for the less extravagant, so him giving into your desires over what he felt you deserved is a big achievement in your eyes. “Thank you,” you whisper, burying your face into his chest as you wrap your arms around his waist tightly once more.
Terry is content to hold you in silence for a moment or two, before releasing you to take your hand and lead you to the comfortable booth, guiding you into place and pouring you each a glass of prosecco before taking his seat next to you. You immediately twine both of your legs around one of his, wanting him close and enjoying the intimacy that this degree of privacy affords you – it means so much more to you than any expensive, formal setting.
“To you, my love,” he croons, raising his glass to you in a toast. “May you find happiness and joy everywhere you go, for that is what you bring to the world and everyone around you.”
You clink your glass with his and down half of your drink quickly to complete the toast, so that you can crawl into his lap and pull him down for a heated kiss, your toes tingling.
“I’m sure I will,” you murmur against his lips. “I’ll be with you.”
Terry’s gaze softens, a sweet smile stealing across his face before he pulls you in for another kiss that quickly has you both getting carried away, Terry gently turning you to lay back in the booth as he comes down over top of you. Fortunately – though that’s debatable – you are both still fully dressed when a pointed cough is heard from behind Terry some time later.
You immediately squeak, flushing an even darker shade of red while Terry remains cool as he always does, straightening up slowly and giving you a wink before turning to look over his shoulder at the server. “Another few minutes with the menu, please,” he requests nonchalantly, turning back to you before the server stammers an “Of course, Mr. Silver,” and scurries back downstairs.
You can’t help but let out a breathless giggle, sitting back up and trying to fix your hair. Terry’s gaze runs up and down your body, and you reflexively slide away from him slightly, knowing that you need to establish some boundaries before you get carried away.
“Don’t even think about it, Terry Silver. I don’t care how alone we are out here, we are not having sex in public!”
With an exaggerated huff and a pout Terry concedes, though he does pull you closer until you’re half-sitting on his lap once more. You both look through the menu together, your head tucked against his chest as you read, and he passes on your orders to the server when they return as you can’t bring yourself to look them in the eye, faint traces of a blush still dusting your cheeks.
You sit in comfortable silence for a few minutes after they’ve left, before Terry suddenly slides you off of his lap, an unusual jitteriness to the way he moves that you aren’t sure what to make of. He takes your hand in one of his own, bringing it to his lips and brushing kisses across your knuckles, his gaze scorching.
“I truly can’t fathom how I am the man lucky enough to spend this day with you, Y/N,” he coos softly against the delicate skin of your hand, and you shiver with pleasure. “I must start thanking you for every day you choose to share with me.”
“Terry…” you breathe, overwhelmed as always by the devotion in his words and his touch. He doesn’t push you to say more, instead continuing to kiss his way up from your knuckles to the back of your wrist and slowly up your forearm. He pauses halfway to your elbow, leaning back and staring at your arm with a perplexed expression. You try not to squirm, your brow furrowed as you look up at him inquisitively.
“What? What’s wrong?” you ask with concern after he remains silent for longer than you can stand.
“Something is missing,” he informs you seriously, before reaching into his pocket and retrieving a flat, square gift box. “Happy birthday, beautiful.”
You slap him lightly in the chest for his theatrics before reaching for the box with trembling fingers. Inside is a stunning diamond tennis bracelet, the gemstones artfully arranged into vines, leaves and flowers. You nearly drop the box in your shock, but Terry’s quick reflexes have him catching it before it’s even fully left your grip.
His lips are quirked in amusement as you try to stammer your thanks, but you can barely get any words out in your shock; you know that money is no object for him, but this must have cost a fortune. By the time you’ve composed yourself he’s already secured the bracelet around your wrist, giving your now-decorated wrist an approving nod.
“That’s much better,” he purrs, lifting your hand and watching the bracelet catch the light at every angle. “Though if I had my way you’d be covered in jewels and not much else,” he adds, his thumb delicately rubbing the sensitive skin of your wrist in a way that has heat coursing through your veins.
“Terry, it’s absolutely spectacular! Thank you so much,” you gush, unable to take your eyes off of it. You’re vaguely aware of Terry humming contentedly – he’s far more accustomed to you trying to reject gifts of this magnitude, and is clearly pleased by your easy acceptance.
“I assure you, it doesn’t hold a candle compared to the woman wearing it,” he says with a wink.
The servers arrive then with your meal, and while you’re briefly irritated by their timing, you soon see it as a good thing; had they arrived even two minutes later, you know they’d have found you in a completely compromising position.
---
The meal is delicious, and you and Terry are enjoying the night with one another in a comfortable sort of bubble that belongs only to the two of you. Terry’s arm around you is all the protection you need against the growing chill to the air, and you’re more than content to curl up on the bench seat and into him further.
You’re absent-mindedly toying with his hair, out of its signature ponytail – you suspect he wore it this way on purpose, knowing your preference for it – and humming contentedly along with the soft music, when you chance a glance up at his face and notice him looking down at you with an anxious expression.
“Is everything okay, Terry?” you ask, moving your hand to stroke his cheek. He immediately leans into your palm, a pleased sigh escaping him, and he moves to take your other hand in his.
“More than okay, Y/N. I wanted to give you this at home, but I can’t wait anymore.”
With uncharacteristic nervousness, he withdraws another box, slightly thicker than the first, from his coat pocket, placing it on the table. Your mouth goes dry.
“Terry, another one? This is too much, I can’t –” you protest, sliding the unopened box back towards him. In a flash, one large hand covers your own, and the box beneath it, gently caging them against the table.
“You can, and you will,” he says in a low, firm voice, giving you an intense stare. “Open it, please.”
He releases your hand, sliding it and the box closer to you, and you bite your tongue as you lift the top off of the box.
Unlike the jewelry you’d expected, a small set of silver keys lay neatly presented in the box.
You stare at them for a long moment, your jaw falling open slightly, before you force your eyes upwards to meet his own.
“Move in with me,” he requests in a soft voice, his expression vulnerable. “Please?”
You’re utterly speechless, your heartbeat thudding loudly in your ears, and it takes you a moment to remember to breathe. When you look up, Terry’s brows have started to crease in worry, and you realize that you have yet to answer him.
Throwing your arms around him, you gasp out an acceptance as you pepper his face with kisses, tears streaming down your cheeks. You feel Terry’s arms embrace you tightly as the tension leaves his body, and he lays reverent kisses across the top of your head as you hold one another.
“Really?” he asks, his blue eyes seeking yours for confirmation. “You’ll live with me?”
His rare show of insecurity has your heart melting, and you rush to reassure him.
“Yes, Terry; God, yes!” you whisper breathlessly, and the smile he gives you is dazzling.
“Now, tell me there aren’t anymore surprises left for me tonight – I don’t think my heart can take anymore!” you joke with a sniffle, wiping at your tears.
As if on cue, the sky erupts in brilliant colours, light popping noises scattering through the night. You immediately turn to look at Terry, concerned that the fireworks are going to trigger his PTSD, but he seems unsurprised by the sudden explosions.
“Oops.” Terry mumbles under his breath, more to himself than to you.
“Are… are these –” you stammer, turning all around you to see the colourful display circling you from every direction in a giant ring that spanned blocks.
“For you? Yes,” Terry admits, smiling down at you fondly. “But nobody else knows that.”
And it’s that little detail, more than anything else so far this evening, that tells you that Terry Silver is the man you were meant to be with.
“May I interest you in the dessert menu, Mr. Silver?” a server asks during a pause in the fireworks.
“Just the bill, thank you,” Terry says dismissively to the waiter, keeping his eyes locked with yours. You raise your eyebrows in surprise, even as desire coils in your belly from the way he’s gazing at you in the candlelight.
“I’ve got plans for dessert back home.”
---
Terry’s POV:
It’s an incredible test of his self-control to not have his way with you in the back of the limo on the ride home, but he knows that once he starts he’s not going to stop until you’re both spent.
Instead, he elects to focus on how soul-deep, over-the-moon happy he is right now, that his house is to become your home; it’s everything he’s ever wanted. He leans down to kiss you again where you’ve settled in his lap, one arm curled around you possessively while the other toys with the sensitive skin behind your knee, making you squirm pleasantly against him and letting out cute little moans that he greedily swallows into his own mouth.
He can tell that you’re partly surprised by the fact that he’s (mostly) keeping his hands to himself, and he chooses to keep up the behaviour if only to see how you’ll respond to it. Now that you’re taking this next big step in your relationship together, Terry finds that he wants to spend all of his waking hours watching you react to life around you. You’ve enthralled him like nothing else.
So, when the two of you arrive back at the mansion, he scoops you into his arms the moment you’re out of the backseat, carrying you bridal style up and into the house while you giggle and blush like a debutante, your arms locked around his neck and resting on his shoulder. He pointedly says nothing, carrying you past the stairs leading to the bedrooms and moving through the house to the kitchen, enjoying your look of growing confusion.
“What are we doing in here?” you ask once he’s set you on the edge of the kitchen counter.
“I believe I told you I had plans for dessert back home. What did you think I meant?” he asks with mock innocence, grin widening as he watches your face turn red. You try to kick at him with a bare foot but he dodges it nimbly, taking off his coat and hanging it on the back of a chair before moving to roll up his shirt sleeves. He catches you watching and bites back a smirk, your reactions to his body never failing to stroke his ego.
“Alright then, Betty Crocker, what’s on the menu?” you snark at him from your perch on the counter, trying to brush off the joke at your expense, but he isn’t fooled.
Terry had thought about it on the ride home, and he realized exactly what he wanted to make for you: a dessert from his childhood. He had remained a relatively private person throughout your relationship, especially when it came to his own history, a boundary that you had always respected but were clearly curious about. Now that you were starting to really, truly build a life together – his heart clenches intensely at the thought – it seems like the perfect time to give you a bit of insight into his past; God knows you’ve been patiently waiting for it.
“Bavarian cream,” he answers, taking in your expectant, curious look as you cock your head at him. He can tell by the patience in your eyes that you’re waiting for an explanation; you know that he never does anything for no reason. You know him so well, and every moment he’s reminded of that little fact sends his spirits soaring.
He’s waited so, so long for you, but it was all well worth it.
“It’s a creamy custard,” he explains as he busies himself with gathering ingredients from the fridge. “It was my favourite as a child. My mother used to make it for me.”
Your gaze softens even as it lights up – you’re clearly pleased by this new bit of information, just as he knew you would be.
“I can’t wait to try it,” you tell him sincerely, a beautiful smile lighting up your face. It’s clear that this genuinely means more to you than the hundred-thousand-dollar bracelet dangling from your dainty wrist, and he finds himself marvelling for the umpteenth time about how you truly just want him for him.
He falls into the comfortable rhythm of preparing the dessert – separating egg yolks, whisking the ingredients together, heating them on the stove, and beating cream into stiff peaks before adding it to the custard. The two of you are making casual conversation as he works, but it doesn’t escape his notice that you’ve been getting hot and bothered, your tongue peeking out from between your lips on occasion as you watch his hands at work.
You’ve been so patient, and given him so much today – starting with that blowjob in his office – on your birthday, no less.
It was time to start rectifying that imbalance immediately.
“It’ll need some time to set,” Terry explains, his eyes on the contents of the bowl on the counter between you. “Though I suppose I should make sure the flavour is to your liking first, hmm?”
He watches you swallow thickly as you watch him dip a long finger into the creamy, pale dessert, your mouth dry as he lifts the digit to your lips. Your beautiful eyes look past his finger to seek his out, and you stare up at him unblinkingly as you shyly extend your tongue to lick a dollop of the sweet cream off of his finger. Your eyes widen slightly, your pupils dilating, and you let out an incredibly sensual moan, instinctively grabbing his wrist to hold his hand steady so that you can take his finger into your mouth, sucking it clean.
Even he’s surprised by the intensity of the shudder that rocks his entire body at the gesture.
He can tell by the way that you lick your lips and avert your gaze that you’re about to ask for something intriguing, and he tries to contain his interest.
“So all that happens now is that the gelatin sets?”
“Yes,” he answers, curious as to your train of thought.
“But it’s technically safe to eat now?”
“Yes,” he replies in a hoarse voice, hoping that he’s accurately picked up on your train of thought.
Sure enough, you tug him towards you, wrapping your limbs around him and squeezing like a python as you pull him down into a fiery kiss.
“Let’s take it upstairs just like this,” you suggest, panting slightly in your arousal. “Now.”
---
Reader’s POV:
Terry somehow manages to juggle both the bowl of dessert and you wrapped around him as he carries you upstairs, kicking open the door to his bedroom – soon to be your bedroom – in his haste to get you where he wants you. You giggle in his arms, taking the bowl from him and setting it on the bedside table.
“Eager, are we, Mr. Silver?” you tease as he climbs onto the bed on all fours with you still hanging onto him.
“Yes,” he answers immediately, sounding unabashed. “You’ve spent the day entirely too unravished, if you ask me.”
Detangling your limbs from around him, he lays you out on the bed before running his hands from your ankles up your legs, disappearing beneath the floral fabric of your dress to tug your panties off.
“Speaking of eager,” he purrs, holding the damp scrap of fabric in front of your face, “you’re already soaked for me, aren’t you?”
“Yes,” you groan desperately, trying to keep your eyes focused so that you can unbutton his shirt.
Terry growls in approval, slipping his hands beneath you to pull down the zipper of your dress and gently pulling the sleeves down your arms before tearing the clothing off of you in one swift motion. Sitting up on your knees, you push the shirt off of his shoulders, but before you can get a firm grip on his belt he’s got you on your back again, pulling one of your legs up to wrap around his hips.
“We’ll have more than enough time for that later, sweetheart. Right now is all about me spoiling my girl the way she deserves.”
Not wanting to be outdone – it was your birthday, and you should get what you want – you blindly reach into the bowl of cream, gathering some on your fingers and swiping them across Terry’s mouth. He tries to snatch up your fingers between his teeth but you’re too fast for him, instead pulling him in for a truly decadent kiss, your tongue gathering the cream from his lips and sweeping it into his mouth.
The positively sinful groan he lets out has your toes curling, and you need to hear more of it, right fucking now.
Taking advantage of Terry’s current state of… distraction – you can feel his erection pressing insistently against your inner thigh – you quickly pull him to the side, rolling the pair of you until you are straddling his hips. The sight of Terry shirtless with mussed hair has you grinding eagerly against the bulge in his trousers, and you quickly reach for the bowl again, painting stripes across his chest with the sweet substance so that you can bend down and lick him clean.
The slight saltiness to his skin only enhances the flavour of the dessert, and you eagerly devour it off of him, hearing him cursing under his breath when your tongue brushes against a flat nipple. Grinning wickedly, you gather the remaining cream around his nipples, licking and sucking until he loses his patience, growling at you as he forcefully turns you over and pins you to the bed.
Pinning you in place with his hips and a stern glare, he reaches into the bedside drawer for a reel of nylon rope that immediately has you squirming beneath him. He removes the tennis bracelet from your wrist before deftly binding your hands together and securing them to the bedframe above your head, ignoring your weak protests.
“Save me some cream, at least,” you request with a pout – he’s currently staring down at you like you’re something to eat.
“Why should I? I should cover you head to toe and spend all night sucking you clean,” he growls, the low timbre to his voice having your eyes rolling back in your head as you imagine a night of him servicing you. Still, you have a point to make, so you force yourself to focus, sitting up as much as you can with your hands bound over your head and staring him in the eye.
“Imagine fucking my throat with my mouth full of cream,” you purr up at him, pleased at the nearly feral look he gives you in response.
“Christ, you’re a filthy creature,” he snarls, his grip tightening on the curve of your waist.
“Only for you, baby,” you reply with a cheeky smile. His answering smirk has you pressing your thighs together.
“Damn right,” he hisses, his hands forcing your legs apart and to either side of him. “Now, be a good girl for Daddy and then you can have your dessert.”
You nod up at him with a soft whine, trying to brace yourself for whatever is to come.
Terry – of course – had to test your limits, covering your body in the cool substance and tracing patterns on your arms, legs, neck and stomach and purposefully neglecting your breasts and pussy. He keeps his heated gaze on your face as he slowly licks you clean, wriggling his tongue on the underside of one forearm from your wrist to the crease of your elbow in a way that has your thighs quaking to either side of him.
“I still want to decorate this perfect body with jewels,” Terry promises as he languidly licks up cream off of your ankle. “But this will do in the meantime. You taste absolutely divine, beloved.”
By the time he cleans the cream from your limbs you’re a complete quivering mess, but Terry refuses to speed up. You know from past experience that any begging on your part – unless he asked you to – would only make the sadistic bastard draw things out even more.
“You’re being so patient, sweet thing,” he coos approvingly, his tongue swirling around your bellybutton while you arch up into him with a cry. “Such a good girl, letting me eat you up.”
He slowly brushes your breasts with cream next, while you do your best not to seem too affected. The custard is thickening now, each of your nipples decorated by a curl of cream.
“Ah, see? It’s starting to set. Stiff peaks,” Terry jokes before kissing the cream off of a prominent nipple, chuckling around your breast while you keen, your spine completely bowed up and off the bed. He grips your hips firmly, pressing them into the mattress as he continues to devour you, and you’re already so close that the slight pressing together of your inner thighs is enough to have you coming, your legs tightening their hold around his hips as you buck up against him.
“I love watching you come apart for me, Y/N,” he murmurs in a husky voice once you’ve stopped moaning his name and caught your breath slightly, though your chest is still heaving. “You were made for me to ruin, and spoil, and own.”
“Yesss,” you hiss, pulling him upwards with your knees until he gives you what you want, kissing you deeply, traces of cream on his tongue that you lap up eagerly. “I’m all yours, Terry. We were made for each other, love.”
Terry’s exuberance can be felt in every brush of his lips against yours, the way his fingers press into your flesh and his eyes bore into your own. You’ll be happy to affirm your feelings for him for eternity, especially knowing what it means to him.
“My sweet girl,” Terry breathes, nuzzling into the crook of your neck affectionately. “I love you so much.”
“Let me up and prove it!” you tease, tugging at your restraints. Terry smirks down at you, running a hand slowly down one side of your body.
“Let you up? When I finally have you where I want you, in our bed?” he asks playfully, and you can’t help the beaming smile that spreads across your face when he mentions this space being yours now, too.
“No dice, sweetheart, not even for the birthday girl. But I will let you choose if you’d rather have your dessert now or after I’ve had seconds…” he leers down at you, one large hand squeezing a handful of your inner thigh firmly. You shudder, thinking about Terry using you while you’re tied up; it’s one of your favourite things to do with him (though everything you do together nears the top of the list), and you’re surprised he’s letting the focus deviate from you so much today of all days.
“Ooohhh, let me!” you moan eagerly, Terry taking in your enthusiasm with smug satisfaction. He makes a show of taking off his pants, staying just out of reach and watching you squirm impatiently before climbing back on the bed, keeping his knees to either side of your body and his weight off of you, cheekily balancing the bowl of dessert on your ribs.
“Keep it in your mouth,” he commands, using his fingers to feed the cream into your greedy mouth. You hold it all inside, your cheeks bulging out, and Terry gives you a wicked smile, bringing the swollen head of his cock just in front of your lips. You look up at him with needy, pleading eyes, silently begging to give him pleasure. His eyes darken further as he stares down at you right where you were meant to be; utterly at his mercy.
“Tell me what you want, beautiful,” he purrs, his eyes glittering.
“I want to suck your cock, Daddy,” you moan through your full mouth, and while the words are mostly unintelligible, he gets the gist, bringing the tip of his cock to your full lips. You lift your head as much as you can, guiding him inside your mouth with your tongue, the cream moving to accommodate his length.
“Oh sweet fuck,” he hisses, his hips moving to slide deeper, the difference in texture and temperature between your hot mouth and the cool cream clearly driving him wild. You moan throatily around him, your tongue swirling the cream around his cock as you try to bring him quickly. Nothing gave you a greater high than making this imposing, restrained man come undone.
“Such a perfect, dirty mouth,” he growls as he quickens his pace, his fists clenched in the sheets to either side of your head. “God, what you do to me, Y/N,”he snarls before an incredibly sexy whimper escapes his lips, causing his hips to stutter. “You’ve got me so close already, baby girl, I’m going to –”
You lift your legs suddenly, your knees guiding his hips closer to your head, and the movement takes him by surprise, causing him to reach up and grab the headboard as he climaxes, thighs shaking as he keeps his weight off of you. The bitter, salty taste of his cum compliments the dessert wonderfully, and you swallow everything you can before starting to clean the remaining cream off of his softening cock with kittenish licks that have him twitching above you.
Terry, hair mussed and face flushed from the exertion, stares down at you with unblinking eyes as he watches you lick him clean with fascination.
“I’ve got to stop letting you bewitch me, woman,” he comments off-handedly as he smiles at you fondly, sliding down the bed to lay next to you. “Today is supposed to be all about you.”
“I don’t know what you mean,” you say with mock innocence, batting your eyes up at him. “I certainly got what I wanted.”
“What a coincidence – having you tied down and pleasuring me is also at the top of my birthday wishlist.”
“Why should we only reserve it for special occasions?”
He gives you a dark, brooding look. “Every day before I met you seems more and more like a waste.”
“We should make up for lost time then,” you retort with a grin. “Untie me?”
“Oh, I don’t know about that – I’m not quite done with my dessert.”
“But I need to touch you, Terry,” you coo quietly up at him, and his gaze softens. Keeping his eyes trained on yours, he reaches up to remove the rope from your wrists, taking each one as it’s freed and kissing it thoroughly, checking for damage.
“Thank you, baby,” you murmur sweetly, your fingers playing with his hair as you stare into his blue, blue eyes. They were so captivating that you often forgot your surroundings entirely…
The temperature of the bavarois against your aching clit makes you shriek, Terry having taken advantage of your distraction to work some of the cream between your legs. Before you can tighten your grip he’s slipped his head out of your grasp with a wicked smile, sliding down the bed and spreading your legs in one fluid motion before burying his face at the apex of your thighs.
“Oh fuck, Terry, Oh God,” you groan, trying to grind your hips up against his face. He watches you with feverish, bright eyes peeking out from above your mound as he makes you come apart from him again, backing off right before you reach the point of no return.
“That’s right, sweetheart, let me love you how you need,” he purrs, chuckling as you fist your hands in his gorgeous silver curls and try to tug him back to where you need him. Predictably, your attempts have no effect, and he turns his head slightly to give you a patronizing kiss on your inner thigh.
“Terry!” you whine his name, panting desperately, “PLEASE!”
“There’s a new rule for you tonight, beloved,” he informs you nonchalantly, as though you were in any frame of mind to follow along. “You want to come once, you come twice – got it?”
He dives back in to eat you out before you can even respond, and there’s no way you can be expected to form a coherent thought and make a decision. You know that Terry knows this, too, and that you’ll happily agree to anything right now if it means that he’ll let you come.
“Yes, fine! Please don’t stop,” you beg, and you can feel him smirking victoriously against your folds as he snakes his tongue inside of you. Throwing your legs over his shoulders, he takes his time, spreading the last of the dessert along your hips and thighs and devouring you thoroughly.
“I will never get over the way you taste,” he groans with satisfaction, two fingers pumping you full while he flicks his tongue over your clit, and you come hard, screaming his name. He doesn’t relent, quickly withdrawing his fingers and replacing them with his tongue as he drinks up your release, dragging out your orgasm with his lips and purring his approval inside of you; you can feel it in your bones.
“Give me another one,” he demands in a low, husky voice, his large hands gripping your thighs tightly as he spreads them apart, watching your pussy quiver in its release. You let out a wordless whine, your hands laid overtop of his where he holds you open.
“Make… me…” you pant, staring down at him challengingly, and he gives you a wolfish grin, blunt fingernails digging into your soft flesh.
“With pleasure, my princess,” he purrs, his eyes promising that you’ll be begging for mercy by the time he’s done with you.
You’re not naïve enough to believe that this will be the end of Terry’s plans for you for the evening – and sure enough, after thoroughly scrubbing the lingering traces of sugar off of both of you in the shower, he would spend the rest of the night and well into the early hours of the morning making even sweeter love to you.
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Well, I know what I want for my birthday! Hope you all enjoyed!
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dreamsinger-rose · 9 months
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Musings about Trolls Band Together
Secrets, Timelines, and Why In The Heck Would Branch’s Brothers Leave Him To Die At The Claws of the Bergens?!
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Hello, good readers! Now that I’ve seen Trolls Band Together, I’m going to start making some new blog posts about our favorite Broppy couple and exploring the world of the trolls in general. Needless to say, this is basically going to be all spoilers, so read only if you don’t mind knowing ahead of time everything that happens in this deeply-satisfying, long-awaited backstory of a movie 😊
The first thing that comes to mind is that when John Dory, Branch’s long-lost brother, first appears, Poppy asks her father if he knew about Branch’s brothers. Looking guilty, he deflects her question. “How would I know anything about secret family members?” Obviously he was also talking about Poppy’s similarly long-lost sister, Viva, but as the troll who was king at the time Branch’s brothers presumably lived in the troll tree, I think he did know.
Maybe he kept quiet because he or Grandma Rosiepuff decided not to keep upsetting him with talk of the brothers who left. Maybe little Branch himself asked him never to mention them again, once he was sure they were never coming back. Or maybe Peppy and Branch did occasionally talk about them in private, but if so, they obviously never told anyone else, not even Poppy.
After World Tour, I suspect Peppy knows a LOT more than he’s ever told his young daughter, in order to let her stay happy. Now that we know there’s an even bigger world out there, full of other societies than trolls and bergens, it’s obvious that he wanted the village to be this idyllic place where his trolls could live innocent, happy lives. I can’t blame him for that. I’m sure they all needed the chance to heal after the trauma the bergens inflicted on them. They needed to feel safe. It seems to have worked, at least for the younger trolls who’ve never known anything else. I have to wonder how many older trolls are more like Branch, hiding emotional scars deep inside.
I also wonder about the brothers’ origins. WERE they all originally troll-tree trolls? If so, did they grow up under the bergen threat, or had the bergens not started eating trolls at the time the brothers left? I got the impression that Trollstice had been happening for years. Yet I find it hard to believe that if they were going to leave, that they’d leave Bitty B in such a dangerous situation. Not after how they greeted him with such (adorable, heartwarming) affection the minute they saw him again.
So it makes more sense that they would have left Branch at the tree before the bergens came along. That would make an awfully short amount of time for Trollstice to become the “tradition” Poppy describes it as in the first movie. Then again, considering the ratio of bergens to trolls in the first movie, if every bergen got to eat a troll once a year, that would mean dozens of trolls would have been lost every single year, enough to decimate the population in a very short time. Peppy escaped with roughly only a hundred trolls, as far as I could tell. Viva rescued maybe another 30(?) Mostly children, by the look of them. Enough for them grow up and create a second generation by the time Band Together starts.
I wish we knew how many trolls there had been originally. Tiny as trolls are, a tree the size of the troll tree should have been able to host at least 500 trolls, if not double that. If the village had originally had about 500 trolls, it would have only taken about four years to lose ¾ of their people. Yikes! I can’t imagine the young King Peppy waiting even a year to try to rescue his people if that kept happening.
Which leads me to wonder if Peppy was originally not from the troll tree. What if he was a roving adventurer like John Dory, who had come upon this caged troll tree full of trapped, desperate trolls who needed his help? Maybe he fell in love with Poppy’s mother, (the princess?) and decided to stay? They made him their king, and he rescued them. What happened to the former rulers?
All of this makes me wonder if Branch’s family were actually big-city trolls who simply left their baby brother with their quaint country grandma, under the impression that he’d be safe there. Before the bergens became a threat, obviously.
If the bergens were already eating trolls by the time the brothers left, (which I doubt, since there was no mention of that) I have two theories as to why they’d do such a selfish, callous thing. Either the trolls didn’t consider the bergens much of a threat (at first), or they didn’t know the bergens were behind the disappearances of their people. It’s even possible that, like in my fanfiction Picturebook Romance, the bergens (mainly Chef) pretended to be their friends at first, until the cage was built. And then it was too late.
LOL I keep remembering Poppy’s comment upon meeting John Dory. “You’re the old one!” He wasn’t too happy about that. But I can easily imagine Peppy being like JD, which might explain why he’s also kind of “old” to be Poppy’s dad.
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tycarstairs · 7 months
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ok i need to talk about alastair for a (long) moment bc i love him.
this got a lot longer than i expected it to btw so ig it’s just for the alastair stans bc it’s basically just a character study lmao
first of all, there’s obviously this:
“I wanted you to have a childhood, a thing I never had. I wanted you to be able to love and respect your father as I never could. Every time he made a mess, who do you think had to clean it up? Who told you Father was ill or sleeping when he was drunk? Who went out and fetched him when he passed out in a gin palace and smuggled him in through the back door? Who learned at ten years old to refill the brandy bottles with water each morning so no one would notice the levels had sunk—?”
like he put so much energy into making sure cordelia could grow up loving and adoring her father in a way he was never able to. from age ten he was hiding his father’s alcoholism, even before he started at the academy.
“Alastair never acknowledging any of it, laughing it off, turning her attention in some other direction, always, so she did not dwell. So she would not have to.”
and then he got to the academy and had bullying and beatings added on top of all that.
“They … let’s just say that by the end of the first week, I had been made to understand my place in the hierarchy, and I had the bruises to remind me should I ever forget.”
like… does this excuse bullying? no, it doesn’t, but it does explain it, especially after he had taken all that for a year:
“After about a year of being knocked around,” Alastair went on, “I realized I could either become one of the bullies, or suffer for the rest of my school days.”
and as he says himself no, he didn’t beat anyone, didn’t get his hands bloody, but yes, he was a bully to save himself from the beatings.
and again, this does not excuse the bullying because of course that’s still bad. i just feel like a lot of people really fucking underestimate how much growing up with an alcoholic parent can affect you. especially when 1) you actually know about it, and 2) you’re the one who has to deal with it from age ten, and 3) they verbally attack you when they’re drunk (as we also saw when elias talked to james)
and then we get to this:
“Then you lot arrived, a bunch of boys from famous families, too well brought up to understand at first what went on far from home. Expecting the world would embrace you. That you would be treated well. As I never had been.” Alastair pushed back a lock of hair with a shaking hand. “I suppose I hated you because you were happy. Because you had each other—friends you could like and admire—and I had nothing like that. You had parents who loved each other.”
and does this excuse the way he treated them? again, no. but once again, it does explain it. alastair had dealt with so damn much since he was a kid so of course he’s gonna feel jealousy. alastair isn’t white, he’s never been able to go anywhere and expected that the world would embrace him as he put it, so that’s yet another thing he was more than likely jealous about.
and he knows what he did was wrong. he knows there’s no excuse, he knows they would all be well within their right to hate him for the rest of their lives if they wanted to, and i feel like so many people forget that?? alastair never expected to be forgiven for any of this.
and then we get to his sexuality and charles.
if i did the math right, alastair would’ve been either 16 or freshly 17 when he started dating a 23-year-old charles and to quote cc:
“it was a bad and unhealthy relationship, and i think the age gap is part of that.”
anyway, there’s one quote i’ve had in my mind ever since chog, and it’s when alastair asks charles, “If this is not what you came for, then why are you here?”
this implies that charles is only ever there for one thing. like, alastair is in love with this man and he wants to show that but charles isn’t letting him.
not to mention that charles is also dismissing alastair’s wishes:
“And I thought that you would agree to marry too.”
“That I would marry?” Alastair sprang to his feet. “I have told you over and over, Charles, even if I did not have you, I would never marry some poor woman and deceive her as to my love and regard.”
alastair having to tell charles over and over again that he’s not marrying a woman and charles still assuming that he will like… sir 🤨 he said no 🤨
anyway. then there’s to how he felt about his sexuality:
“Father’s weakness is not your weakness.”
The fire in the grate had nearly burned down. Alastair’s eyes were luminous in the dark. “I have my own weaknesses, as you well know.”
and after this when cordelia tells him that love isn’t a weakness, he responds with “isn’t it?”
like this man is comparing his own sexuality to the way his father treated him. you cannot tell me he was always okay with being gay because he so clearly was not, especially not with charles trying to keep him hidden and trying to make him marry a woman.
and after elias dies:
“I can’t mourn,” he said in a choked voice. “I cannot mourn my own father. What does that say about me?”
his relationship with his father was so ruined to the point where he couldn’t mourn him because he wasn’t able to love him in the way cordelia was, likely because he mourned his father already when he was 10.
and there’s also some of cordelia’s observations in choi:
Some months ago Cordelia had learned the emotional cost of Alastair’s interventions, the invisible scars he worked so diligently to conceal.”
the emotional costs being this:
“She knew Alastair was not always like this—she knew he could be kind, sweet, vulnerable even. She knew her father had broken his son’s heart a dozen different ways, and Alastair was doing the best he could with the pieces.”
like. elias has been breaking alastair’s heart over and over basically in every possible way since he was at least 10 so he’s really just doing what he can to stitch himself together at this point, the exact reason he put up walls.
“But it didn’t help for Alastair to behave like this, to retreat behind a cold facade as cutting as glass.
The way James retreated behind the Mask.”
alastair is basically just one big defense mechanism.
we also have thomas’ observations about alastair:
“There was only one other person Thomas had known with eyes like that. Not golden eyes, but dark, and so sad—he had always been drawn to that dichotomy, he thought, of the cruelty of Alastair’s words, and the sadness with which he said them. Sorrowful eyes and a vicious tongue. Tell me, he had always wanted to say, what broke your heart, and let such bitterness spill out?”
the answer to his question: elias.
elias broke alastair’s heart and left him to respond to everything with defense mechanisms.
alastair is such a complex character and he’s also one of my absolute favorites because of that. his relationship with his father is so realistic, and him distancing himself from everyone else because of his father is also so realistic. i just love this character with my whole heart ok
this is so long but istg i could write a whole essay about this man and ykw? maybe i will.
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roninishere · 1 year
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Half of my heart.
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Obanai Iguro x female reader
Warnings: sadness, regret, depression, more sadness.
Summary: Obanai loved you so much, but his past prevented him front being with you.
||
‘Would you remember?
Would you still think of me the same?
Every December, I've been reminded of things I should say to you, but I'm silent
Give it a moment of silence
In a moment, I've wasted our time
I'm here if you've think I've stopped trying 'cause
‘I love you Y/N, marry me, so I can finally be the man you deserve.’
Those were some of things he should’ve told you, but he couldn’t bring his filth into your life, he had done enough already. He had ruined your life already in his eyes. Giving you hope just to rip it away from you. No matter how many times you told him you didn’t care about his corrupted blood, how his scars didn’t make him the disappointment that he had imprinted in his mind from his younger years, how many times you cried and begged him to stop punishing himself for his traumatic and horrible past.
No matter how many times you told him that you love him and you’ll never another.
‘Half of my heart is still there
I do what I can, but I'm scared
Would you still remember, I swear
It's been too long now
Even if I'm gone now
Half of my heart is still there
I do what I can, but I'm scared
Would you still remember, I swear
It's been too long now
Even if I'm gone now
Half of my heart is still’
The photograph that never left his left breast pocket, reminded him everyday of what could’ve been. Where he left half of his heart. With you when you gave birth to a spilt image of him. Exact; those turquoise and yellow mixed matched eyes, the jet black hair, and pale skin.
Everything he grew to hate about his image growing up, were now so beautiful. His son was the most beautiful thing in the world.
Though he couldn’t be there, but that didn’t stop him from sending gifts for his son who would grow up and live life to its fullest. He wasn’t there in person, but he ensured that no harm would come to the ones he couldn’t be with.
He kept himself away for the two of you.
‘Darling how could I forget
Autumn of the year we met
Know you still have things to say
The difference is I broke us apart
The difference is the same as it was’
You took his breath away the moment he saw you, he just had become a Hashira, you weren’t a Hashira yet, and the Master put the two of you on a mission together. You had the brightest smile and kindest personality that anyone could in the corps. Neither one of you meant to fall for each other how quickly you did. However, before it could blossom into something beautiful and forever, he ripped all your hopes and dreams away.
He’ll never forget how he watched a part of you die that day.
‘Cause it's too
Silent and it's been killing me in silence
In a moment, I've wasted our time
I'm here if you've think I've stopped trying 'cause
Half of my heart is still there
I do what I can, but I'm scared
Would you still remember, I swear
It's been too long now
Even if I'm gone now’
The serpent pillar always felt he prevented you from happiness, to a normal life, until you’d send him letters every six months expressing how happy you and his son were. How thankful you were to have met him, and be with him only for a bit. How you still loved him and would forgive him of all his sins like you always promised. To allow himself to be happy. To allow your son to be happiness to having his father in his life. ‘It’s not too late Obanai, baby, please don’t punish yourself anymore. Come home to us.’
‘Half of my heart is still there
I do what I can, but I'm scared
Would you still remember, I swear
It's been too long now
Even if I'm gone now
Half of my heart is still
There, there, there’
He had talked himself into doing it. He even got as far as to your home, hiding in the shadows until he saw how grown his son was. Had it been three years already? What if his own son thought of him as a monster? Was if his own son wouldn’t want anything to do with him the more he grew up? The two of you were in the backyard; you were grabbing dried laundry with the little boy in your arms who playfully chewed in his fingers.
“Is someone hungry? Silly boy! Those are not food!” You playfully teased as you pulled his hand out of his mouth “hmm, how does totoro kombu sound? Huh Obanai? Shall momma make your favorite?”
He froze in the shadows, not taking another step forward as the little boy screamed out in joy as she chuckled, walking back inside. The serpent Hashira felt the fingers of his dead family dig into his skin, not allowing him to finally step out of the shadows.
You named your son after him, and his favorite was the Hashiras favorite food.
He sighed deeply ‘Forgive me again Y/N, I want to come home, to the two of you, but I’m scared.’ Kaburamaru and him exchanged disappointing looks before walking in the opposite direction of where half of his heart was.
‘Someday, I’ll be back someday.’
||
Part 2!
Oh my god! I made myself cry writing this. I wanna do a part 2, any ideas or inputs? Ahh! I’m so scattered brained haha. I love y’all! Inspired by Half of my heart by Josh Makazo.
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In Defence of Albus Dumbledore:
Look. I know this is an unpopular opinion, so I’m going to write this here because putting it anywhere else (like at the bottom of the fics which have inspired this frustration) would seem mean, and it would probably end up coming off as unintentional flaming, which I would never do to anyone ever. Also, as I’m less frustrated with individual works than I am with an entire situation, it wouldn’t really be fair to direct it at one specific person.
Get ready. This is going to be very ranty and long and I can't promise not to get off topic and onto a tangent a few times.
I understand that we all have grown up a lot since first reading Harry Potter. I get that once we realized how grey a few of Dumbledore’s decisions actually and the ways in which they affected the characters we love we all felt rightfully upset.
But can we please stop being so narrowminded about it?
There are plenty of redemption fics out there. A lot of them are works that redeem characters like Severus Snape, Draco Malfoy, Draco’s parents, various Dursleys and loads of other people. I’ve seen fics that have Sirius confronting the realities of his juvenal behaviours and having to atone for past wrongs. I’ve even seen (but admittedly never read) fics that redeem Voldemort himself.
But the least popular person for a redemption story in fanfiction by far seems to be Albus Dumbledore.
I get it.
He was supposed to be an infallible genius who did no wrong and he let us down. But please.
Can we all please just admit that we’re using Dumbledore as a stand in?
The hatred we as a fan community levy at Dumbledore is influenced by so much more than his actions in cannon.
It’s the dissolution we feel at growing up. The need as young people to bite back at overbearing authority. It’s the conviction that leaders should never be allowed to fail if failure means the death of innocent people. Even though we can all recognize on a personal level that our failures are typically unintentional and are definitely what make us human.
Of late, it’s very clear that Dumbledore is a stand in for the betrayal we feel at JK Rowling’s anti-trans standing.
We all loved her so much.
She gave us this world.
She promised it to everyone.
And then she said that it was all a lie, and that it was never meant for some of us anyway.
The parallels are clear.
While we were first reading, we loved who Harry loved. Simply because he loved them, and we loved him.
When we grew up, we started acknowledging the ways in which the characters mirrored people in real life, and we chose the people we found the most familiar to love instead. Personally, I understand the reason I read Severitus so often is because I had a largely absent father who I idolized as a child, and that father was a bit of a rockstar like person. Dark, intelligent, and cruel when he wanted to be. Artistic, genius, condescending, and amazing.
As an adult, I still long for his love and approval. Learning that Severus was capable of so much good at the very end of his story, that he was in fact good all along, even when he looked exactly the opposite, gave me hope that my father was too. Even though I now understand that redemption for my father is just a fairy tale it’s still a story I hold close to my heart. A story I long for. It’s a possible happy ending for both a lonely child and a jaded grouchy adult.
Albus Dumbledore was different.
This was a man that we trusted to have everyone’s best intentions at heart. We were told he was safe. We were told he was the smartest man in any room. And then he failed us. And we looked back at all he had done, and rather than seeing the good he had tried to achieve, all we could see were the mistakes he had made.  
I firmly believe that the reason that so many people hate him so strongly now is because we all loved him so much first. Like Harry, we all believe that he was incapable of mistakes. His mistakes in cannon aren’t any more morally condemning than anyone else on the light side.
Keep in mind that I said, “in cannon.” I feel like I need to distinguish that. In cannon, though Harry asked if he could stay at Hogwarts during the summer, he never told Dumbledore about living in a cupboard under the stairs. His letter was addressed to there, but we have no way of knowing whether it was physically or magically written on the envelope. And besides, that letter was signed by Professor McGonagall, not Dumbledore. Harry also never mentioned to him the Dursleys withholding food. Or locking up his trunk so that he couldn’t do his homework. He made it clear that they disliked him, that they thought him a burden, but think. Really think. Dumbledore is the head of a school full of children. How many children misunderstand and exaggerate even in their own minds how much their families dislike them.
Let me be clear; when I say kids exaggerate I don’t mean in terms of abuse. I only mean typical things such as, “My mom’s always grouchy when she gets home from work and she never notices that I’ve tried really hard by cleaning the bathroom if she told me to clean the kitchen before she got home and I decided to do the bathroom because I wanted to clean it instead of doing the dishes and now she’s yelling at me that she just needs me to help her sometimes, and I don’t feel like that’s fair because really I do. Look, I cleaned the whole bathroom by myself! And I straitened up the living room too! The only thing I ‘forgot’ was the kitchen and now she’s acting like I do nothing. This means she hates me and appreciates nothing I do. I am clearly a burden to her, and I should go live under a rock so that she doesn’t have to deal with me anymore.” Really, your mom probably isn’t saying you’re a burden. Your mom is more than likely overworked, over-tired, and almost certainly depressed in a society that doesn’t cater to mental health awareness, and on top of all that she was raised by a generation that was allergic to admitting and self-regulating their true feelings so she can’t articulate that and she’s instead taking her frustrations out on you.
This is wrong, and she shouldn’t do it. But consider. Why didn’t you want to clean the kitchen? Was it because you had a long hard day at school and you’re overworked, over-tired, and definitely depressed in a world that doesn’t cater to mental health awareness, and all you really wanted was a break from the hardest job and you just wanted to compromise by doing the ones you felt emotionally and physically able to do? Because I promise, that’s probably exactly how your mom feels about the damn dirty dishes that she’s going to have to deal with before she can make dinner after being cussed out and yelled at by customers and or bosses all day in between doing her actual work and that’s the real reason she’s yelling.
Because, though a lot of teens believe otherwise, parents are still just people and the feelings that overwhelm kids still overwhelm adults just as badly. And they’re even less likely to know how to help themselves because they didn’t grow up with the internet where everyone shares their feeling and gets back validation and advice, so they mostly just believed those feelings were personal failings that indicated something broken specifically only in them and that they should learn to live with it and never tell anyone ever because complaining is for babies and liberals. Okay, maybe that last bit is a little too specific to my own mother, but you get the idea.
It’s a cycle that’s been going on for years. Hopefully, we can eventually all learn how to communicate peacefully and compromise on chores sometimes so we can end it someday. Or everyone can just switch to paper plates, and then we’ll worry about how we’re killing the planet later and no one will have to do the dishes ever again.
The point is, while that isn’t the best parenting style, and it can cause issue’s with your familial relationship as you age, it isn’t technically abuse. And it especially wouldn’t be considered abuse in the 90’s while Harry Potter was taking place or the early 00’s when it was being published.
Harry was not bruised when he arrived at Hogwarts. He didn’t show obvious outward signs of abuse. He never told any adults what his life was like at the Dursleys at all. He really didn’t even say much about it to Ron or Hermione either. Mrs. Weasley sent him treats for his birthday, which was a sweet motherly gesture. Hermione and Hagrid did as well but think about it. Do you believe for a second that if Molly have-another-serving, can-I-get-you-some-more-bread, try-the-potatoes Weasley honestly thought the Dursley’s were starving Harry that she would first wait until the end of July to send Harry anything, and then only send him sweets? She would scale the Dursleys’ house and stuff a full six course meal through the bars multiple times a day before she let that boy live off stale birthday cake. When she asked if the Dursley had fed him enough she meant it in the same way she always meant it, in the if ‘I can feed the world I can love the world’ way.
 Hagrid sent him rock cakes, but again, think about it. Hagrid had shown up with a cake for Harry’s birthday the day he first delivered the letter when he couldn’t have yet known of the way Harry was treated. He just wanted to show Harry he was loved and missed.
Of the people who sent him food, only Hermione really knew Harry didn’t get to eat his fill at the Dursley’s and she still only sent cake because all she knew was that he was being forced to diet with Dudley. Which is why she sent him the kind of food one would eat if they weren’t on a diet instead of true sustenance. A fourth of a grapefruit as a meal is not a diet, no matter what Petunia called it. And if he had told Hermione specifics, she likely would have told Harry that, but again, he didn’t tell anyone specifics.
 Everyone knew that Harry was unfavoured by the Dursley’s and that they wouldn’t be celebrating his birthday, and he wouldn’t receive cake or presents, but they really didn’t know much else. Ron and Hermione only understood he was being starved in the way most naive well-fed kids from happy families can understand. It sounded cruel, and they did try to tell people, but because they didn’t understand the full gravity of the situation, they couldn’t properly communicate to trusted adults that Harry was actually experiencing abuse. Plus, Harry tended to downplay it even to them.
When Dumbledore speaks about knowing Harry would come from a less than happy home, you can tell he is picturing a world where Harry is liked second best to his cousin. Where he never feels fully at home. Like an overextended visitor in a relative’s house. He thinks they’ll treat him like the weird cousin who came to stay and never left rather than an immediate family member.
He isn’t picturing Petunia Dursley slinging a frying pan at Harry’s head. Or refusing to let him drink his fill of water on a hot summer’s day spent weeding her ridiculous flower garden. Or an overly restrictive diet enforced on an already undernourished body simply to make Harry’s morbidly obese cousin feel better about his doctor changing his eating habits.
I think we’ll all agree that feeling less than welcome by stuck up relatives sucks, but it’s better than whatever Voldemort’s loyal leftover followers will do to him if they manage to track down the person responsible for their dark lord’s downfall.
I understand why a lot of people feel like Dumbledore should have just put Harry under the Fidelius Charm and hid him rather than sending him to the Dursley’s but consider: If Dumbledore trusted Sirius the way he must have done to not betray James and his family, then it makes sense that he felt Fidelius was no longer an option. He fully believed Sirius was the secret keeper. Sirius, the Potters, and Pettigrew were the only ones to know of the change. It’s likely that after learning that the Death Eaters had convinced Sirius to betray the Potters he was jaded enough to take it as a sign that no one could be a trusted Secret Keeper. No matter how much they loved the person under protection.
He also likely would have insisted on a trial for Sirius had Sirius himself not told everyone that he was the one who killed James and Lily while descending into hysterical laughter. We know what Sirius meant, (he felt responsible for them dying because switching to Peter at the last minute had been his idea) because we read the third Harry Potter book, but Dumbledore didn’t have that same advantage. All he had was the word of an apparently mad man. A man who had just tracked down another dear friend and apparently killed him and 12 innocent bystanders in a fit of insanity.
Why, when last he had heard Sirius was the Secret Keeper, would he doubt a verbal confession from a man who did nothing to try and save himself from Azkaban? The Marauders never told anyone of their animagus abilities. No one but Sirius could have understood what Peter had done. Why do we expect Dumbledore to have known better?
So, instead of Fidelius and hiding Harry away for his entire childhood, he gave him the best protection he could think of under the circumstances he had been given. He sought to give Harry a normal life and to keep him safe from the remaining Death Eaters.
Dumbledore understood that fame was power, and that power could corrupt even the best of people with the strongest of minds, so he kept Harry away from the limelight. He also understood how fickle people where about fame. This was the right decision even if the Dursley were a bad choice in guardians. We saw proof of this numerous times while Harry was at school. His fame only ever seemed to bring him more hardships. In book two they said Harry was a dark wizard because he was a Parselmouth and that that’s how he overpowered Voldemort. In book four even some of Harry’s friends refused to believe he wasn’t just a glory hound and that it hadn’t been him who entered his name in the tournament, but rather someone trying to kill him. In book five, almost everyone refused to believe Harry was telling the truth about Voldemort’s return. Every single time Harry’s name entered the limelight, it was in a way that harmed him. Imagine how much earlier it would have started had he grown up in the wizarding world. They would have been debating his kindergarten finger paintings if they could have.  
Why does the entire fandom also assume that Dumbledore thought of himself as the wisest most all-knowing man in any room? The only people who canonically acted like they believed that about him were the Golden Trio, and they were enlightened otherwise multiple times throughout the books as they grew up. Just as everyone learns new truths about trusted adults they thought of as perfect as they grow.
The fact is, Albus Dumbledore has always been just a man.
He was a great and powerful but flawed man who wanted more than anything to make sure that evil could not prevail. He obviously still holds plenty of shame and guilt over his dealings with Gellert Grindelwald in his misspent youth. We have surmised that when he looked in the Mirror of Erised he likely saw his sister Ariana, or something as equally heart-breaking which he recognized as his own fault. He fully understood that he was just a man. He encouraged everyone to understand that fact about Voldemort as well.
He was not a god, and he didn’t pretend to be.
Not in cannon anyway.
Fanon Dumbledore, on the other hand, tends to be anything from a meddling idiot to a full on manipulative dark lord complete with moustache twirling and nefarious intent. Which, I believe, further influences and enforces the fandom’s collective bad opinion of him. Most of us haven’t reread the real books in years. It gets hard to remember at some points what was something he did in canon vs. what was something he did in fanfiction.
 Every other character seems welcomed to grow in the world of fandom.
Severus was canonically a willing Death Eater in his youth, a bully to children in his care in his adulthood, and a petty grudge-holder who couldn’t let go of the past. We accept that we can’t fully know how much of his behaviour towards the students was an act to fool the Death Eater’s children, but we can assume it definitely wasn’t all of it. Still, he gets plenty of redemption fics. He had literal access to Harry’s traumatic childhood memories but still saw no signs of abuse because he was too busy trying to keep a 15-year-old child from gaining any ammunition about his own past.
Looking back, it seems obvious that as very few of Harry’s childhood memories were shown in the Occlumency scenes, he likely wasn’t as bad at clearing his mind as either he or Snape assumed, but it was also possible that Severus didn’t see those memories because that wasn’t what he was looking for. The memory of Harry getting chased up a tree by Marge’s dog as the rest of his family watched and laughed should have triggered at least a couple of red flags, but Severus was typically determined to only see the bad in Harry, so he overlooked it.
James Potter who is often thought of as the better choice for Lily was also a bully. And he spent years relentlessly pursuing a relationship with someone who had never given him any indication that his advances were welcome and had in fact outright told him the exact opposite of that many times until he finally wore her down and convinced her to give him a shot. That’s gross, unacceptable behaviour but I guess it is technically better than dating a budding racist that sees you as the exception to his views on your people, so James is rebranded as a lovable hero who changed after having a slightly misspent youth rather than a mean spirited bully who likely grew bored with his main target once he no longer saw him as competition (there would have been no reason to bully Snape if Lily wasn’t friends with him anymore after 5th year which was conveniently around the time he began to “grow up”) as well as a pushy loser who wouldn’t take no for an answer even though Lily said it multiple times. (There’s also the point that once Snape knew about Lupin being a werewolf, James likely wouldn’t have bullied him anymore so as not to provoke Snape to reveal the secret and get Lupin thrown out of school and possibly killed.)
Ron told Molly outright that the Dursley’s were starving Harry and had fixed bars on his windows to trap him after weeks of being concerned when he didn’t reply to Ron’s letters, and she still ignored it, assuming instead that Ron was exaggerating and never even tried to check with Harry to learn that he wasn’t.
Remus spent a year teaching Harry individualized lessons to repel Dementors and never once asked him why he was so sad that they affected him in ways that none of the other students experienced. I mean really, he couldn’t have been the only orphan attending that school so Remus couldn’t have thought it was just that. And Neville’s backstory was nearly just as sad (and just as well known to Remus) and even he didn’t faint like Harry. Yet, he didn’t question Harry once.
Sirius (who is also a bully and a petty grudge-holder) never wondered why a child would want to move in with an escaped prisoner who he had never met before that had just mangled his best friend’s leg and tried to commit murder in front of him instead of the relatives he had been with his entire life. Even when until that very night he had believed that prisoner wanted to kill him?
Arthur actually met the Dursley’s and saw Vernon’s rage at magic when he came to collect Harry for the Quidditch World Cup and he still questioned nothing.
Half the Order found Harry locked inside his bedroom with locks affixed to the outside of the door, and all they did was give vague unfulfilled threats to Vernon and send Harry back. You could blame that on Dumbledore, but I think that’s ridiculous. They were not under Imperious. They made their own decisions. Every adult there had a responsibility to that child, and they all failed him individually.
Yet time and time again I see Dumbledore condemned so overwhelmingly in the very fics that redeem and or absolve these other characters of those very actions.
Even McGonagall, who knew from the start that the Dursleys were awful people, never pulled Harry aside as his head of house and asked him anything about his home life. And, as I stated earlier, her name was the one on the letter addressed to the cupboard under the stairs. She also made it very clear that she wasn’t someone for Harry to confide in by constantly dismissing any concerns he presented her. The way she reacted about the Stone was ridiculous. And her non-concern over the amount of detentions Harry received from Umbridge followed by the ‘have a biscuit’ scene rubbed me the wrong way. And yet, of late she seems to be revered in the fandom community as some kind of badass grandmotherly character. All because she protested one time about leaving Harry with the Dursleys and then never brought it up again.
It’s getting a bit ridiculous. I’m exhausted by the way the fan community continues to rewrite cannon to fit their dissatisfaction with our once trusted role-model JK Rowling through Harry Potter’s once trusted mentor Albus Dumbledore.
Just once I would like to read a Harry Potter fic without having to think about the various ways in which JK Rowling let us all down. And with everyone rewriting Dumbledore as the ‘real villain all along’ I can’t help but be taken out of the fic and forced to relate it to reality.
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answersfromzestual · 1 month
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Anon who sent me the ask about their parents "demonizing" your transition.
Parents have your life planned out for you before you are born (it's not fair, but it's how they are). So when you want to transition genders, all their "plans", "hopes", "dreams", etc. are "destroyed" (ex. they thought you'd grow up, get married, have babies, etc.). This is all a shock and something they will just have to get used to if they want to be in your life. I imagine you still live with them, so tread lightly. I tried to explain to my parents they are losing a very unhappy daughter and gaining a happy son. It wasn't easy. It still isn't. My chest has been done for over 15 years and my father won't look at me with my shirt off. My mother is the worst for misgendering me to this day, doesn't talk when I speak about having children one day. It used to make me mad, I'd start by correcting her, now I just tune it out, grit my teeth and I have been out for about three decades. Parents have a hard time coping, they are far from perfect so they can mess up. They see you transitioning as an absolute loss, and that's not your fault. It will take time, and you never know how long it will actually take for them to embrace it.
I do have an article on here for parents and phalloplasty, from a legitimate resource. If they would be interested/ willing to read it.
Don't you dare let them blame you for "destroying" their marriage, if they say that they are using this as an excuse because they have a probably unhappy marriage. This started long before you even told them, so don't blame yourself. That is not a very nice thing to say as a parent. Well none of it really is, but... They are using you as a lightning rod and I'm sorry for that.
For the time being I'm glad you found some solace in my blog. Feel free to vent to me anytime.
I am really sorry. There is nothing wrong with you, you are not the reason they are miserable, okay? You are perfect just as you are and are worth so much love. You deserved to be loved inside and out.
Please do not put yourself in harm's way, or get yourself thrown out on the street.
Do you have anyone you can talk to about this, an adult, therapist, school counselor, a relative, even an older sibling? Anyone that can maybe have your back if anything happens. Maybe create a plan if something happens.
I imagine you are such an amazing individual, I can tell you are fighting a fight and you're not taking your goal out of your sight. You are brave and stronger than you think. You should be very proud.
My blog is here whenever you need to get some support, or vent.
I'm sending you love, and good vibes. I'm always here if you need me.
-Zestual
P.s I hope you know they are wrong about the procedures and everything else. It is safe and common.
If they have questions, you can send them to me and I can try to answer anything you cannot.
I'm proud of you
Stay Golden ✌🏽💙❤️
Article source:
https://www.phallo.net/
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takobaki · 9 months
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Snowy innocence // PT 2
A bite of care
Octavinelle Dorm
A/N: NEW SECRET CHARACTER THAT WILL BE MENTIONED MORE, AND SOME MIGHT BE CRINGY/EMBARSSING SO SORRY IF IT IS
Word count: 1,001
Warnings: BAD WRITING, SLIGHTLY IMPILED NEGLECT AND ABANDONMENT, AND CHARACTERS MAY BE OOC, NOT PROOF READ, SHORT
Other parts here
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"Huh?" Alkni let out quietly as she turned to him, her eyes wide in shock.
'S...so so...hungry' The girl thought to herself as she walked by a bakery, causing her stomach to rumble. She rarely was feed by her parents as most of the time they barely had enough money to feed themselves, much less a barely growing child. 'Maybe this time I'll be able to get some food' Yet it was all wishful thinking as before she could barely step foot in the bakery, she was abruptly dragged out as the person dragging her out, cursed her out Again
Alkni quickly shook her head up and down as she looked at him with doey eyes, making Jade chuckle. "Well, lets go see what we have" Azul said as he picked her up from Jade's arms.
When Azul first picked Alkni up, he couldn't help but notice how light she was. Albeit most kids her age weren't the heaviest, she seemed lighter then she should be. Usually Azul wouldn't do this for free, yet Alkni was a young child, and seemed to be in need of help. He could always have her pay him back for his help in the future anyways.
The dusty black haired girl sat outside the kitchen, waiting patiently for Azul to finish making her something to eat. She was far to afraid to be close to Azul, thinking that if she annoyed him in the slightest, she would have her opportunity to have food ripped away from her. Azul walked over to her, holding a plate of food in his hands as he squatted down to Alkni's height "Before I give this to you, I need you to answer one question for me" Azul told her as he gave her a warm smile, trying to be as comforting as possible to try and get her to answer his questions
"What is your name?" Azul asked as he tilted his head to the side slightly. He knew that the more information he could get on her, the more he could do to find out where she came from. Alkni paused as she tried to remember what a name was
"Come on Alkni!" ████ said as they gently picked up the 3 year old girl, lifting her up and swinging her around in the air. "I promise you, I'll do whatever it takes to protect you... I will stop anyone from trying to harm you, I promise" Holding the three year old girl close to her, the tall woman rocked her as she hummed a happy tune, which ████ had always called 'Alknis lullaby'
''A...ah... Alk...ni?"
She said as she looked up at Azul, her words coming out as more of a question rather then her own name. "Alkni, huh?" The light gray haired man hummed quietly to himself as he handed her the food as promised
Alknis eyes light up as she quickly grabbed the piece of food, quickly taking small bites out of the food. After spending long periods of time by herself on the streets, Alkni had grown used to eating food very slowly in a attempt to keep food for as long as possible
Azul let out a amused chuckle as he watched the girl whom he know knew as 'Alkni' eat the basic food he made. Truth be told, he had never seen anyone so excited over such a simple food, and yet it filled him with a sense of warmth
Almost as if he had been put under a spell
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03/19/████
Dear diary
"If you want something, then you must always do it yourself"
Thats what I've always been told.
Of course they never meant it in a encouraging way, rather a 'Shut up and leave me alone' way
We are barely scraping by from the money that our family is giving us, and yet, they deicide to bring another poor poor unfortunate soul here.
I would assume its for extra money and sympathy- knowing them it almost 100% is
So are they finally taking their own words to heart...?
Because if so, this isnt how you do it.
-██████████████
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Alkni sat at one of the tables in Mostro Lounge, swinging her small legs back and forth as she listened to the three Octavinelle students talk "Lets bring her to Sam, he might be able to do something about her" Jade said in a whisper, making the little girl freeze in her seat, her red emotionless like eyes widening in fear. Usually whenever they would say that, it would only mean the worst would happen
"Okay, and he might be able to find something useful out about her" Azul said as the three students walked out of the VIP room they were discussing in, which Alkni shouldn't have been able to hear them in. "Hey Ricefish! You wanna go somewhere fun!" Floyd said, flashing her a toothy grin, showing off his sharp teeth.
The red eyed girl quickly shook her head no, as she curled into herself, trying to make herself harder to carry if they where to try a grab her, fearing whoever this 'Sam' guy was would hurt her. "Whats wrong little rice fish?" Floyd asked as he walked over to the table she was sitting at, squatting down to meet her eye to eye.
Floyd did want to do what he always did whenever someone didn't comply, usually for contracts, yet something was stopping him from doing it, making him let out a sigh.
"How about if you go with us, I'll get you some extra tasty food" The octo-person said from behind Floyd, his arms crossed behind his back, while flashing her a warm smile. Alkni perked up upon hearing the word food, as she looked up towards him wearily
She slowly nodded as Floyd picked her up, grinning as he threw her over his shoulder "Now Floyd, thats not how your supposed to carry a child" Jade chirped, making Floyd shift her into a more comfortable position
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hightwer · 1 year
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the early reception of hsmtmts season 4, or what we’ve seen of it so far, has been majorly positive. there have been a lot of negative comments too and while everybody is completely within their rights to criticize/discourse over media, the extent that some “fans” have been going to (mostly bitter portw*lls) is just borderline malignant and i’d like to address some of these reoccurring complaints.
as it relates to ej caswell, he is NOT a punching bag. i’ve seen so many people argue that they’re no longer supporting or watching the show because of its treatment of ej and i’m not mentioning this to attempt to police what people should or shouldn’t support, i’m mentioning this because the arguments i’ve seen for this point are laughably vain, as well as hostile towards every other character who isn’t him.
ej is not some victim of bullying by the hands of the writers. every character in hsmtmts has struggled. every character has had to endure some level of change, because it was necessary for them grow. every character has been penalized for trying to revert back to the things that actively regressed them. rini, that was shown to hold both ricky and nini back, didn’t stick for that exact reason. ej hasn’t gotten it worse simply because the writers wanted him to.
his “character arc” was learning not to give people food poisoning. his “struggle” in season one was losing followers because of a poor decision that he consciously made.
and of course, i couldn’t tackle this entire ej discussion without mentioning the whole “ricky stole his girlfriends” card that people are still playing. nini and gina were not THINGS to be stolen. both of them made the choice to break up with ej for reasons that were completely valid, because people who’re capable of thinking for themselves can do things like that. portw*lls and ej fans have a pattern of degrading gina especially, all because she didn’t allow herself to stay in a relationship that was making her unhappy.
you guys cannot stand that ej doesn’t get to own who he dates. it’s beyond telling.
as it relates to fan service, the people claiming hsmtmts sacrificed “realism” to cater to fans being anti rinas doesn’t surprise me. the disney show is the one you guys are cracking down on about realism, okay.
rina isn’t fan service. gina getting the lead isn’t fan service. those are things that make complete sense within the contextualization of the show, which you guys always choose to ignore. these are things that have been built up through parallel storytelling and through multiple accounts of foreshadowing, but i understand those who are saying these things are happening because the show needs “saving” with olivia gone wouldn’t perceive it that way.
i’m not calling anyone simple minded. but what’s the real reason gina shouldn’t be the lead? what’s the real reason ricky shouldn’t be with a girl who understands him, supports him, and provided the positive change that he needed at a low point in his life? why shouldn’t these characters be happy with each other?
ricky and gina are the truest to themselves when they’re together. ricky sees gina’s ambition, he sees her talent, and he praises her for that. gina sees ricky for all of his potential. she never actively tore him down, she never ridiculed him. was there a point where she set boundaries between them? sure, but they came out on the other side of it the strongest they’ve ever been. certain characters exiting the narrative doesn’t mean that the other characters stop growing or developing, the story doesn’t suffer just because your ship isn’t endgame, or because your favorite character isn’t always happy.
finally, in defense of ricky bowen, he’s had more than enough growth to beat the regression allegations.
just to reiterate, gina wasn’t property for him to claim. gina is the one who told him that he’s been her choice for some time, despite not being her plan, he was still the one she was choosing. ricky didn’t coerce her into saying that. he wasn’t pulling strings or feeding gina lies so that she would break up with ej, either.
ricky has been battling with change and defining himself since the very beginning of the show. over the course of three seasons, we watched ricky genuinely commit to theater. he came to camp to be with his friends, not to sweep gina off of her feet. even with people calling him unreliable, even after being told that he has “no profitable skills”, even after having some bumps in the road. ricky has done nice things for his friends without expecting anything in return.
after being defined by his slip-ups, more or less, ricky finally got to hear that he was a yes to someone. a shot worth taking. i’ve seen people complain that he’s the main reason that they’ve given up on the show, as well as claim that he gets everything handed to him. he had to make sacrifices and lose things to get to where he is. there’s quite literally no denying that.
this has gotten entirely too long, but i’m trying to illustrate that a lot of these story beats are obvious. no one is obligated to watch something that they don’t like, but i’ve seen former “fans” act horrifically racist and sexist, i’ve seen them discredit the cast, i’ve seen them complain about the attention season 3 gave to anxiety and sexuality, just because they weren’t happy nini left the show, and because portw*ll wasn’t together by the end of the season.
this is a disney show at the end of the day, try and relax.
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greypetrel · 7 months
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(resisting the urge to not say "i'm not calling you a liar" for Raina LOL)
Maybe "This is as good a place to fall as any" for anyone who fits for Radha, or anyone else who fits? c:
Hello Laya!
Thank you for asking and LOL that song for Raina would have been so funny. x°D
This got me thinking. As previously said, I’m all for Solavellan when it’s platonic, not much when it’s romantic. But, Bedroom Hymns was undeniably romantic, and I couldn’t find one way to decline it as platonic (I TRIED). Thinking and rethinking about how to make myself like Solas as a romance enough to write something convincing unlocked me, tho!  I tried, let me see how it went, it was out of my comfort zone, but I hope it’s convincing enough.
And for the record, this is the book I followed. Some names are adapted to Dragon Age of course (Arbor Vitae sounded so similar to Arbor Blessing that I just put that. And “Virginian Spiderwort”… I put the name of a random city in the Free Marches. Also, Tevinter Plum is Indian Plum, with a VERY rough assignation.)
Tis the prompt list
Floriography
[ “This is as good a place to fall as any” ]
This is his body This is his love Such selfish prayers And I can't get enough Bedroom Hymns - Florence + the Machine
Radha observed Josephine with the air of a person that firmly believed she was being made a fool out of.
“Oh, come on.” The ambassador laughed. “Don’t make that face, it’s just a coded language like any other Leliana taught you!”
“Except assigning meanings to flowers makes no sense. Why should a Pansy mean thought?”
“It means I think of you. And I don’t know, maybe because it’s such a pretty flower?”
Radha watched Josephine fix the bouquet in front of her with care, a smile she couldn’t contain on her lips and in her eyes. She looked happy, and even if Radha knew who sent those flowers and was burning to tell her that Blackwall was hiding something, and to watch out… Whatever made her smile like that couldn’t be all that bad, she considered. She could attach meaning to those flowers, if she wanted, it really hurt no one, as much as a nonsensical way of communicating that was.
“If you say so.” She shrugged in the end, not convinced.
“I think it’s sweet.” Josie kept on, and turned her smile to her  in a way Radha didn’t like. “Wouldn’t you like for Solas to gift you flowers as well, and know he meant something with each one he chose?”
The elf groaned in all answer, rolling her eyes to the ceiling of the office. It was far too silly for her, and as Josephine laughed at the display, she smiled back at the woman and wove a goodbye, turning back and leaving her to attach whatever set of words she wanted to the plants she received.
She crossed the Great Hall, headed to the library, and the thought still stuck, picking at her curiosity all the more because she couldn’t really understand the purpose of it.
She was there when Ydun filled the aravel she and Aisling shared with field flowers, once her sister complained the other never did anything spontaneous. She was there to help Aisling  and her girlfriend clean the damn flowers out of the cart, which took the three of them hours of work, and a big question on what to do with all those flowers.
It had been silly and uncomfortable, and even Aisling had agreed that maybe picking flowers wasn’t that nice. That they were nicer growing in fields, instead of dead just for a fleeting moment of beauty.
That had settled the flower matter, for Radha, and she told Solas right away that if he really wanted to court her, beside not entering her dreams uninvited ever again, not to gift her flowers. And he had listened on both things.
But now, working with Leliana on how to circle the Templar blockade in the Emprise du Lion, reviewing reports and trying to concoct a safe way around the main pathway that could lead an armed group into Sahrnia off track, without having them trapped in the snow… The thought kept bugging her most annoyingly.
So annoyingly than when they were finished for the day, after she checked that Aisling and Dorian weren’t planning on setting themselves on fire or make something else explode that afternoon, she started shuffling the bookshelves until she found… ah.
Floriography.
There was a whole book about it, and it was fairly thick. Surprisingly thick.
Shuffling through pages, she discovered it contained pages upon pages with pictures of every single flower and plant, with instructions on how to recognise the wanted variety precisely, curiosities and other uses. Beside a dictionary of associations, ordered one by flower, one by meaning.
Radha wondered why it wasn’t just a book of botany and nothing more.
But, curious as she always was when meeting something new to learn, she placed herself on her spot on the couch in the rotunda, and started to read. With a grudge, and fully intending to disprove that silly method and silly book.
“I thought you weren’t the type for flowers.”
A known, dear voice chuckles over her, coming to sit beside her some minutes after.
She huffed, settling better to get in contact with him, allowing Solas to hug her shoulders and peek on the page she had opened on her bent thighs, as she kept on reading.
“This language is stupid.”
“Is it? I think it’s a clever way to communicate in an environment where being open is socially frowned upon.”
“Bah.”
She scoffed, not convinced, and turned the page.
“A rose changes its meaning according to the colour. It makes no sense.”
“A letter can stand for two different sounds as well, making equally little sense.”
Radha huffed through the nose, shaking her head. Not convinced at all. Solas chuckled some more, and bent to press a kiss on the side of her head.
“Would you like to try?”
She turned to him, raising one eyebrow in a silent and very disappointed question that, apparently, just amused him more.
“Just to see if it makes sense in the end, or if it’s fun.”
“Crittography is fun and doesn’t require the death of a plant.”
“It’s far less beautiful, tho.” He countered. “The brief time a flower is allowed to bloom adds to its meaning. Even if its life is brief, it’s not less precious. All the more so for it. And the sentiment attached keeps on even if the petals wilts. I find it quite poetic.”
Radha shrugged, seeing the point of his words but not fully agreeing with it. She settled herself more comfortably against his side. If he was in a mood for explanations and reading and not for painting, it was fine with her. Aisling had rubbed off her too much for Radha to not have picked up that love was in touch.
 A slender arm clutched her closer, another kiss made her lips curve up in a smile, and she turned another page, deciding she may as well indulge him. If not just to prove it wrong. It didn’t work for Cullen and Aisling, she didn’t see why it should work for her. But if he wanted to try…
“As you wish.”
“I will think of something.”
She shrugged it off, and went on reading, trying to figure out if the whole thing had some sense upon it. But no matter how much she read, she just couldn’t figure out how one person could look at a bush of lavender and think of Distrust.
---
Radha found the first flower three days later, early in the morning when she walked out from her room.
On the ledge of the half wall, just in front of her door, he left her the Floriography book. In its pages he firmed the stalk of the first flower, shining white against the dark of the stone, tiny flowerets gently moving in the breeze that swept the Keep. She conceded herself half a smile, just for the care he took to leave her the guide as well. Shuffling through the pages, it was easy to find the flower she needed. It was a fairly common bloom and she of course knew its name well.
Lily of the Valley: Return of Happiness.
She rolled her eyes to the sky, but kept smiling, as she gently smelled the flower.
Silly and sappy.
She needed to find just the right answer. She was early anyway, she could spend ten minutes finding for something on the damn book.
Facing Aisling and asking her if she could please summon a very specific flower she had but a picture of in a book was another story. She hated to ask, and she knew that of her siblings, the one truly skilled with Creation magic was, without a hint of a doubt, Pavyn. But, she didn’t really trust other mages on such a personal matter, their brother was miles and miles away, and Aisling would have had to do. Even if she smirked with a horribly knowing smile at her. Saying nothing, and at the same time saying everything.
Radha groaned at it, Aisling laughed, and she gave her the flower she had asked anyway, telling her to come anytime for the next. This looked like an important mission, and had the priority, surely.
The flower was left on his desk right after, during lunch.
Ostwick Spiderwort: Momentary Happiness.
Because she was playing the game, but she was playing to prove it silly.
They went on for days, leaving flowers to each other back and forth, in places each one knew the other would have found it and know whom it was from.
When they met, they never spoke about them, of course: the fun was in the secrecy of it, and talking about the flowers would have broken the game.
Solas left her a White Periwinkle: Pleasures of Memory.
Radha shook her head and oomphed, found just the right flower, and pushed Aisling to create it anyway even if she disagreed with her choice of proving a point.
“Can I at least tell him I disagree with-”
“No, Shrimp.”
“Oomph.”
Tevinter Plum, for Privation.
He didn’t say anything, but looked at her funny that evening, raising just one eyebrow as he saw her, in a silent question. She rose one of her own, challenging him to say something. He smiled under his breath and spoke of something else.
The next morning, there was a jonquil in a small glass jar on her spot at Leliana’s table. Leliana smirked knowingly, but all she had to say at the third time she looked at the plant – just to check the jar wasn’t staining the map it rested upon, of course- was:
“It means ‘I desire a return of affection’.”
Radha groaned and urged everyone -who was horribly giggling at her, to get back to work, they had no time to lose in silliness and flowers.
She wasn’t ready to give in so early, so her choice was, and at that Aisling giggled in mirth. Not that Radha minded.
A Lady’s slipper: Win me and wear me.
To which the answer was quick:
Saffron Crocus: Mirth.
Radha smiled at it, and mirth was what she felt. Before the cook saw her with that particular flower in her hand and yelped, asking her where did she found it and if there were others, if there were enough they could have saffron for free and-
Flowers were dangerous, Radha decided, running for her -and mostly for Solas’ life from an overeager cook that would have demanded the mage to grow her a field of crocuses daily, if she had caught her and coaxed a name out of her.
The next flower, she found it herself in the garden, growing spontaneously in the meadows. A fitting answer, she thought, returning to the rotunda just to slip it behind his ear, with a briskness that masked some shyness out of inexperience. He turned, and she was out of the opposite door with just a glance of pink cheeks.
Wild Daisy: I will think of it.
When she finished with her training, patting dust away from her trousers after the Iron Bull threw her to the ground the fifth times as she was distracted by parrying Krem’s sword, his answer was in the scabbard of one of her daggers. For all she blamed this stupid flower thing for being silly and pointless -and it was silly and pointless and a waste of magic- the small twig with red lantern-like fruits brought a smile to her face, and made her forget that her back was sore and she fell badly on her shoulder.
Gooseberry: Anticipation
The game continued in the next days, and keeping a straight face when they were together became more difficult.
Radha thought she had a good control over herself: she wasn’t emotional in the way Aisling was, bursting into tears and smiling wide so everyone could partake in her emotions as well. She felt hers, but always kept them private. This new thing, tho, the expectation of seeing the hint of a coloured petal or of a leaf every way she turned, made her silly.
Her lips curled up in a smile almost automatically when she caught a glimpse of Solas, in a way she found silly and blamed herself for it. It happened to others, it happened to Aisling and Pavyn and Vyrina: it didn’t happen to her. It never did, and she wasn’t interested in having it happen. She was happy as she was.
And yet, seeing him smile back, something melting in his face, posture relaxing ever so slightly, took some of the disappointment away from her.
She left him a sprig of mezereon: Desire to please.
He answered with a white mignonette: Your qualities surpass your charme.
She was happy that he left it in her room, so nobody could see her blush. He wasn’t scarce in compliments, but she wasn’t really good at receiving them. Less of all in replying it: it felt… Too much, too soon, and she didn’t know what she should do.
After hours and hours of mulling it over, thinking if she was ready to be more direct and give a compliment back -he knew she admired him, what more could he want? Courtship was stupid. She decided that maybe not. She also decided that asking Aisling would have been a terrible idea if she didn’t want her sister to arrange with Leliana and Josephine a way to close them both in the same room with candles and rose petals and a chocolate cake so big no couple of living beings could ever dream of eating on their own… she may as well just offer him some sincerity back.
That would have worked better than Aisling setting them up, surely.
Amaryllis: Timidity.
She stayed the whole morning on pins and needles, uneasiness settling in the depth of her stomach in a way that was familiar of every time someone had requested something physical or emotional from her, and she just… Hadn’t it in her, and was made to feel in defect because in the field of love she wasn’t interested… Or in this case, when she surprisingly found herself interested, she needed to proceed slow.
He didn’t make her wait, tho: his answer was waiting for her in the war room, where she was expected for a recollection of the official plan to gather an entrance in the Emprise and Leliana had requested her presence.
A ceramic glass, stained with paint on the border -one of those he used for water when he painted, she knew- with clean water and a sprig of Evergreen Thorn, heavy with firey red berries.
Solace in adversity.
A consolation, and an acceptance. Aisling and Josephine looked at her, seeing the twig. Josie was worried, knowing probably the meaning of it, and asked her if everything was all right.
“Yes.” She answered. “Yes, it is.”
And she was fully sincere in her words.
The answer was fairly easy to find: it was Aisling’s favourite after forget-me-not, and it felt like a witty remark.
A tiger-lily on the top of his scaffolding, in the same glass: For once may pride befriend me.
She was up in the first story of the library, in the corner beside Aisling and Dorian to see his reaction. He turned the flower in his long fingers, and he heard him chuckle, as she had intended him to. He turned towards the nook with a sly smile, caught her eyes.
She felt the shiver of magic and the smell of ozone, and the next thing was something velvety and delicate caressing her right cheek. She startled to the side, thinking of something evil, for to her right there was just stone wall.
It was no demon what met her, but a single flower growing between two stones, and what velvety touched her was its leaf, spiky and sharp beneath delicate rosy and purple flowers.
“Can you go elsewhere before I puke with all this sappiness, please?” Dorian complained, groaning aloud.
“Hush, you!” Aisling giggled, swatting his arm aloud. “They’re cute, leave them be.”
“They’re getting sappier than you and Cullen, and I’m getting diabetes. Too much straight energy for me.” He groaned aloud, as if he was in pain, and let his bust fall heavily back, a wrist on his forehead for added dramatics. “I think I may die.”
Aisling hoomphed under his weight, collapsing back a little in surprise. A pile of books fell down under their combined weight, but they went on bickering about Radha one moment, their experiment the next. In the meanwhile, Radha had found which flower it was, and what did it mean. She snorted a laugh.
Oak leaved geranium: True friendship.
“See? Sappier by the minute, I swear!”
“Leave her be!”
It was, all in all, a nice afternoon full of laughter. And in all sincerity, all Radha could answer was but one flower.
Saffron Crocus: mirth.
It went on for some days more, and Radha slowly and carefully had to admit, if only to herself, that it was indeed amusing to go back and forth that way. No words, no grand declarations nor speech. Just colourful messages, well thought for their synthesis, to the point.
A bellflower in her glass, at breakfast: Gratitude.
Corn straw, deftly braided, between his quills: Agreement.
And then, after a day, when Radha was thinking he had stopped, they got through with it and had their fun but there was only so much they could tell each other through flowers -not thinking that she spent the day looking this way and that expecting a petal, a splash of colour in her field of vision… Another one that left her unsettled.
He had asked her if he could leave a couple of books he had meant to lend her directly in her room, instead of leaving them in the rookery where she was, and let her bring them back herself. She paid it little mind and told him yes, and in the evening, when she returned, there wasn’t just the four volumes of history on her desk. No.
There was a flower on her pillow, bright and colourful on the white of the sheets.
Ranunculus: You are radiant with charms.
Radha felt her breath grow short, the blow stronger this second time around, and she wondered if it was normal. She didn’t like this romance thing, she always felt like she was dancing without knowing the steps nor what he expected from her. This compliment thing… It left her uneasy and terribly, horribly seen.
Was it so bad, this insistence and being seen? Yes. But maybe… She didn’t mind being seen by Aisling, but Aisling had ways that were more delicate, and didn’t put a mirror in her face. This… A rational part in her calmly acknowledged that it was courtship, every animal did it. Birds flaunting coloured feathers to attract the female, hallas fighting for the same reason. Bonding gifts served the same purpose. Reproduction as the end goal. But this wasn’t that. She’s been clear that she wasn’t interested in that, she didn’t want children of her own, and she didn’t know if she would have ever been willing to try more intimacy than kisses. She never had the urge before, after all. He had been understanding and told her he didn’t mind it, he was happy with just whatever she had to give, and wouldn’t have asked for more.
It was the companionship, what she didn’t expect. It was the gratuitous appreciation of what she was, not what she could do, her qualities and skills. The way he listened to her and asked her opinion after long, long explanations, and seemed to value each and every of her words, remembered what she told and interpreted her ways for what they were, appreciated them. It was the smile he had just for her and the tender way his eyes would melt.
It was how her heart beat fast and how her mind could, if she tried, figure out the exact way he would have said “You are radiant with charms”, and how it made her horribly dizzy.
She prayed Aisling was in her room and was alone -she couldn’t face Cullen on this. Creators, asking one person was a lot.
Luckily, she was there and she was alone -made a weird face when Radha confessed she didn’t expect her to be, but was quick in changing the topic. In a way that told her that she didn’t want to talk about it, but still. They sat together on her bad, legs crossed, with all the curtains of the canopy drawn, it almost felt like an aravel: Radha spoke and Aisling listened with attention.
“It’s scary, isn’t it?” She asked in the end, an understanding smile on her face as she cupped her face to look at her in the eyes.
“What?”
“Falling.”
Radha glomped down. Was that it? Was it? All the fuss, all the chasing and sighing, all the novels and poetry, for this? For feeling dizzy and unsure? She didn’t like it. She didn’t like it at all, but something clicked true in her.
She nodded, feeling herself blushing madly.
“Yeah, I know, it’s shitty. Truly horrible.” Aisling agreed, moving forward and dragging her bust down to hug her shoulder, collecting the rogue against her frame. “It’s ok, tho. You can cut the game any time, there’s no obligation to answer. You already told him that you were shy, it’s ok. He won’t insist if you don’t want him to.”
Radha hummed, knowing she was right. It wasn’t anything serious, this game of theirs, anyway. The experiment had proven its point, she could call it out whenever she wanted.
And yet, that ranunculus…
“And- What if I wanted to?” She squeezed her eyes shut and drowned her face in the crook of Aisling’s neck.
Fingers started to thread in her hair, caressing and soothing, a kiss pressed on her cheek.
“Well, then. If you wanted to… You can be sincere about why you don’t want to reply. What about it?” Aisling asked. “Is there another flower for shyness?”
There was, they discovered after running all the way down to Radha’s room and the book. And checking also what Dandelion meant now because Aisling decided she may as well try it too, and “Cullen is definitely a dandelion”. She was very disappointed when she discovered that Dandelions meant “Rustic oracle” (“What does that even mean?? It makes no sense!” and Radha couldn’t but agree). But they found one for her as well, and it was with a sigh to get some courage, that she left it on his desk, very early in the morning.
Peony: Bashfulness, shame.
As embarrassing as it was, that was what she felt.
Waiting for an answer, after all, was still better than dreading answering in the first place. She had work to distract herself with and… Was that Cullen with a crown of dandelions on his head the one Varric and Sera were whistling at?
She had work to distract herself with.
The answer came soon enough, thankfully, and it calmed her down considerably.
A twig with leaves of white poplar: Time.
She smiled at it, relieved in her anxieties. The perfect answer, really, and she felt silly, now, for doubting him so. He gave her time, and time was what she needed. With a fuller heart and a calmer mind, and more faith in the future, she gently pressed one of the leaves in her notebook, as a keepsake, and went on with her day.
Her answer was a columbine: Foolishness.
She felt a little foolish for worrying so, truth to be told, and if sincerity paid off… Why not keeping up? Maybe it would have brought something else of good, while she tried to unwind the ball of yarn her feelings and thoughts got wound up into.
She had time, yes.
The next one was another leaf. One she knew fairly well, and which spoke thankfully more of him than on her.
Arbor Blessing: Unchanging friendship. Live for me.
Radha knew, turning the trail in her hand and rubbing the leaves between two fingers to release the balsamic perfume of them. Surely he meant just the first meaning of it. He was the first one to say she should pursue other interests and friendships that weren’t him. With a dedication she didn’t really understand.
That little slip tho… That little inattention, finding something with a meaning so contrary to whatever he ever told her.
Maybe he was equally bashful about this whole endeavour. Thinking of it, he always spoke of her and her qualities, what he saw in her. Never of what he himself was feeling more deeply than expressing friendship. Before this one. This one little slip that…
Maybe she was reading too much into it. But he was always so precise and careful, measuring his words with such attention, that Radha found hard to believe that he just read half the definition.
Weirdly enough, that little slip made her heart beat, but not with the anxiety of those days before. No. This time it was tenderness, and recognition.
If he was bashful too… Maybe she really had nothing to fear.
Maybe she already had fallen, and she didn’t realise she already landed.
Beside, her mother didn’t raise a quitter.
So, she marched to Aisling and asked her one last flower. This time, knowing perfectly well what she wanted.
The next morning, Solas found a thin vase on his desk, in a corner as if it had been always been there.
Inside, sprouting tall and proud, one single purple lily.
First emotion of love.
Radha, that evening, got back into her room to find not one flower, but a full bouquet. It was just one bloom, and it filled the room with a pleasant, sweet perfume.
Lily of the valley: Return of happiness.
She smiled wide, didn’t mind he entered her room without asking, and let her treacherous heart keep her awake for long, that evening.
Enjoying the sweet smell of lily of the valleys for the brief and precious moment while it lasted, and maybe understanding a little better why people gifted flowers.
Why Lavender meant Distrust, tho, she never understood.
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