#but saves at least one life because of it. then so be it)
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samah-h · 2 days ago
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A Confession from the Heart of Suffering: An Unbearable Reality
I hope you read my confession, and thank you. This is the reality of all the people of Gaza.
Whenever I think of the life we used to have before the genocide, I have to struggle to hold my tears so I don't cause my children more pain than what they already feel. Our life, then, was neither easy nor perfect but it was full of warmth and the simple joy of being together under one roof .
We have never felt completely free because we have always been under a siege that has only gotten worse during this war but at least we felt somewhat safe and we had quite a decent life with the means that we were allowed.What kept us going was our belief that the future might be brighter one day.
Unfortunately, there seems to be no better tomorrow for us anymore. Nothing remains of our previous lives but rubble and memories, and the future is so bleak and full of uncertainties.It's not just the walls of our house that were turned into ruins, it's our hopes and dreams that were reduced to ashes. Now, we only dream of things that might seem so trivial to other people around the world like being able to sleep in and wake up in a comfortable bed or having a meal without standing for it in line for hours.
We dream of having enough clean drinking water so we don't have to worry about dying of thirst. We dream of the days we had a home with a regular kitchen and stove, the days we could celebrate special occasions with family in peace. Above all, we dream of not losing the people we love in a split second and of living safely and with dignity.
Instead, we have been wrongfully sentenced to a life of fear, displacement, and humiliation beyond belief. It is a living nightmare here now. Everything needed to ensure the bare minimum of decency and normalcy is denied to us. As you well know, there is no safe place in Gaza anymore and We are deprived of simple rights like having having a roof over our heads or enjoying some peace of mind for even one single day. The airstrikes and the buzzing of drones almost never stop. We live with a very real sense of impending doom day and night.
The water and food scarcity are only getting worse with time. Even regular chores like cooking or doing the laundry have become true challenges. I cannot propely bathe my children because the little water we get is polluted and their sensitive baby skin keeps getting irritated.
Before the war, my nine- year-old daughter was so picky about which outfits to wear; it made me laugh that she acted that way at her age but now we don't even have enough warm clothes for the winter. It kills me each time she says she doesn't need fancy clothes anymore and only wants to feel warm and go back to school. What makes it worse is our tent has recently been flooded by rain.
The whole camp turned into a swamp overnight. The children woke up soaked, shivering and terrified. It was almost impossible to calm them down as the rain kept pouring. We are doing our best but even if we succeed in finding the treatment, it's going to cost almost a fortune. This is why we need your support even more now.
All we do now is fight for survival every day. I never imagined,even in my darkest nightmares, that I would be searching high and low to put food in my children's mouths and keep them warm or that I would be begging the world to literally save their lives but I have no other choice now.
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Despite the unbearable suffering we're daily going through, I still believe in humanity. please keep us in your prayers and help us anyway you can. Donate if you're able to,reblog and share our story as widely as you can.We are grateful to each and every one of you
Vetted by @bilal-salah0
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curtins · 3 days ago
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going to a cafe with the jujutsu kaisen men a/n: (based on irl experience with a wide variety of subpar men) 😭 gojo's order being my order...aurkay!
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gojo — def the type to walk in and push his sunglasses down to check out the place. his order def goes something like a venti caramel macchiato with almond milk, two pumps of vanilla and two pumps of hazelnut, and a little caramel swirl at the top. smiles and is friendly to all the baristas, he's never rude to workers. tells the barista is gojo, with an o. whoever's unfortunate enough to be stuck next to him is doomed to hear him wax poetic about how coffee beans are the soul of the earth, and its 'really deep, you wouldn't get it lol'. if you order a black coffee, he'll ask if everything is okay at home. can't leave the cafe without ordering a $8.00 sweet treat and then wondering why all his purchases are adding up
geto — walks in as if he's a regular and tells the barista that he'll have his 'regular'. the barista has never seen him before. probably orders a flat white, double shot of espresso, no foam. he always says he doesn't have to pretend to like foam because he's chill like that. he'll ask for the wifi password, but only so he can show off how good he is at working in a cafe, but his ass is on coolmathsgames. will nod and pretend to care about whatever you're saying but he's still thinking about coolmathsgames. will also drop random metaphors like 'life is just like coffee. you either take it strong or with sugar.' you tell him to save the bad metaphors for his cult.
nanami — doesn't wander or hesitate when he enters the cafe. checks his watch every five minute. orders a black coffe, medium, and adds one packet of sugar. he's pretty good at ordering what he wants efficiently, and it leaves even the barista worried. he's here to relax so don't ask him any unnecessary question because this man needs a break. actually enjoys eavesdropping on people's conversations, and ends up tilting his angle to snoop on gossip better. avoids small talk like its another curse. you can't really make him react too much in a cafe, unless you spill coffee on his freshly pressed suit. will be passive aggressive and suggest that the cafe chooses better music. likes a good, dependable pastry. apple danishes are a favourite.
sukuna — prefers tea, without debate. but still orders relatively normal things. likes a good latte with chocolate syrup. but the king of curses kinda has to look cool, so he powers his way through a black coffee, with no sugar or milk. you swear his eyes are tearing up as he pretends to like it. after every sip of coffee, he sighs really loudly and it gets a bit annoying. even after you ask what's wrong, he says its nothing and continues to sigh loudly. nanami may be the one who eavesdrops, but sukuna is the one who interferes. will turn around in his chair to give unsolicited advice, but he genuinely thinks he's being helpful by telling schoolgirls to buy cleavers to chop their friends' hands off. is mildly offended when they move tables and give him weird looks. passes loud comments on other people and tells couples when he thinks they will breakup. attempts to connect to the wifi three times before threatening to burn the router.
toji — the barista asks if he wants a pastry with his drink and he asks 'do i look like the type of man to eat a muffin?' but if they're free, he'll take two. sits with his back to the wall like he's in a mob movie. god help anyone who sits too close to him, he really just doesn't trust anyone in his personal space. doesn't even acknowledge the existence of others until he's had at least three sips of his coffee. you could tell him his house is on fire, and he’d just mutter that he can't do anything about it now. types the wifi password on his phone with one finger like a caveman. tells parents to 'control their spawn' but entertains kids with coin tricks when no-one is looking. sometimes struggles to fit the lid on his go-to cup, and refuses to asks for help. wrestles with it for five minutes, getting increasingly annoyed before rushing out the door.
choso (this one is dedicated to pookie @creamflix) — frowns at the menu like it's written in an ancient language, like wtf is affogato. if someone behinds him coughs, he scolds them and says he's going as fast as he cans. spends 10 minutes deciding and then panics at the last second, tells the barista to give him whatever. if the barista asks any follow up questions (like milk preferences) he genuinely short circuits, "what kinds of milk are there?" he's genuinely baffled that there are options beyond 'cow.' he'll point at a pastry and ask what's in it. the barista explains and he replies with 'okay i trust you.' always ends up picking a wobbly table by accident and spends 15 minutes trying to fix it with folded napkins. if someone asks to share his table, he'll look like they just asked for his kidneys. if someone asks for his opinion on his pastry, its always a dumbass cryptic answer like 'its interesting.' uses his phone on full brightness and everyone can see him look up 'how to pronounce cafe au lait.' cleans up after himself because he's nice like that. if the staff get his order wrong, he never says anything even if it tastes like dirt.
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unbotheredgoose · 3 days ago
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if there's one thing you know about yourself is that you shouldn watch your mouth when you're drunk.
but you're out with your friend, and she looks beautiful when she laughs, and it's so good to see her not stressed from work, and it's great that you finally get to hang out after such a long time, and you can't help but ask her:
"why?"
"why what?"
"why do you humans keep wasting so many resources trying to make that earth planet habital? i don't get it."
she gets this somber look in her face. the laughter stops. she looks like she might cry.
you feel terrible.
"i'm so sorry, i shouldn't have... you don't have to answer that-"
"my grandma was born there, you know that?"
you stop talking. she looks distant.
"when i was a kid, she told us all about how it used to be, before everything. when she was little, she lived in a small house with her parents, and her mom grew crops in the garden, and they had a tree that gave them bitersweet fruit on the summers. sometimes birds would make nests on that tree, and she and my great grandma would set up little houses and playthings for the babies to play with.
she was always fascinated by birds. all animals, really, but especially birds. i've never seen a bird in my entire life if not for her drawings, and she always regretted the fact that she never got into coloring to show us exactly what they looked like.
she has pictures of her and her college friends visiting waterfalls and running together in the wilderness. she used to camp, like, a lot, really camp, in the middle of the woods, just her and her friends, like we read in the books. it's different from camping in vr, she kept telling us, we had to actually learn how to not die in the woods.
she married my grandpa at the beach, and... it's so different from the simulations. the sunset was beautiful in the pictures she showed us, but she told us that it was even better in person. she looked so beautiful with her sunburnt skin, even though she was in pain, and we never have to worry about burning our skin because of the sun, everything is all so protected and artificial, we don't even see the sun anymore.
my grandparents promised each other that when they got older they would have a farm. my grandma always wanted a few birds and a big dog. but then, when my parents were ten years old, the planet was so screwed that they had to populate other planets. she kept telling us that she was one of the lucky ones, because my grandpa was in the military and they helped people evacuate, but that most people like her died on earth.
everyone thinks it's our fault, you know? we doomed our planet, why would we even be trying so hard to restore it? i don't know. my grandma did it because she didn't want my parents to grow up in this place, where everything is made up and she did it all for nothing, because we're still here and we know nothing different from it. and to be honest, it's kind of hard to believe it was her fault in the first place. she really did her best. she saved water. she planted trees. she protected birds and other wildlife. she protested.
the truth is: no one listened. no one important enough, at least. no one cared about the little people like her, who were just trying to live their lives in a doomed world, and kept doing her best. the big guys wanted the money and they fucked everyone else over just to have it."
"i'm sorry, i-"
"i guess now that we've lost everything people are finally learning to miss what we used to have. our lives weren't so bad. and we want to go home, even though that doesn't make sense. i don't know what home looks like. i don't know what a bird looks like, or what it's like to stand on a beach and feel the waves lap at your feet, or what the forest smells like. but i keep trying to go back anyways."
she takes a sip of her drink.
you stay silent.
"You humans have hundreds of planets under your control, so why do you waste so many resources trying to make that Earth planet habital? I genuinely don't understand."
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acowardinmordor · 3 days ago
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I’m waiting at the gate to board a plane, so have the next blip of thought for that high angst secret admirer thing
-
Lucas, the only of the kids with an ounce of emotional awareness knows that something is up with Steve. He also knows that Eddie has been in a manic grief. He doesn’t connect the two. Yet.
He sits with Steve and Robin at lunch at least a couple times a week, and screw Hellfire if they have a problem with it. Basketball team too. Steve is a full stop loser now, and Lucas was for years, he’s going to stand by him. Also, Steve saved his life, literally, repeatedly, high school popularity doesn’t exactly compare.
Ofc Steve tells him he doesn’t need to, but Lucas knows that the guy is sad about something, and extra sad that Dustin is still following Eddie like a duckling. Robin calls him out on it, but Steve has been talking about himself like he’ll never be more than a bullying popular kid. Lucas hates that most of all.
Then again, Eddie is obviously spun up about something. He’s twitchy and snappish, but he’s being nicer than normal to the jocks and popular kids. The thread he can pull on is seeing Eddie scribbling in a notebook - not his campaign notebook - but guarded just as carefully. Lucas follows him eventually and sees the poor, abused copy of the Hobbit in the library.
He reads the start of one, an apology for whatever he did that made his admirer stop writing. There’s a quote near the end from what must have been the other persons last note.
Lucas is smart. Lucas can see the pattern. He takes every single letter. Isn’t going to read them, but the one he read made it clear the both were gay, and there’s only one Eddie in school who would reference lord of the rings.
It’s for Eddie’s safety. It’s for Steve’s safety.
He doesn’t tell anyone. Not even Robin or Max, who have closed ranks around Steve.
Lucas feels like the worst person on the planet when Eddie is giddy the next day. Then his mood sinks back down as the days go by.
Since he isn’t actually the worst, Lucas doesn’t read the letters. Or tell Steve he knows. By the start of winter break, Eddie has stopped leaving letters. All of which are in a box under Lucas’ bed. He’s meaner after break. His rants are more pointed. Lucas gets called out for playing basketball and betraying nerds everywhere.
Steve is withdrawn and quiet, doesn’t even show up to lunch most days, and just keeps telling them that they don’t need to pretend they like him because of the Upside Down. That it’s okay. He knows who he really is. He laughs it off as a joke when someone argues.
But Lucas pays attention, understands why Steve thinks that, and honestly, it makes him hate the Hellfire guys a little. Makes him resent Mike and Dustin even more.
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keferon · 1 day ago
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TexAid - Vortex has taken First Aid as his pilot. First Aid claims Vortex as his mech.
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There's a rumbling in the distance as First Aid crawls out the darkened hatch of Vortex's escape chute.  The hangar is a wreck of collapsed walls, twisted metal pipes, and broken wiring shooting up sparks. 
First Aid pushes himself to his feet, stands back, and uses the flashes of light to take stock of the situation. 
This is…not good. 
He counts a dozen cuts and bruises across his own aching limbs before abandoning the effort.  He is satisfied at least that he is intact, alive, and functional.  All his injuries will heal, given treatment and time. 
Time he may not have.  Because Vortex on the other hand is not so lucky – lights off, systems silent, frame crumpled on the ground.  A slow trickle of oil leaks from the mecha, swirling into one of the many pools of alien ooze scattered around Vortex's frame along with chunks of the aliens' flesh.
The battle had been fierce, Vortex's fighting the fiercest Aid had ever seen against the many enemies.  But for the first time, it hadn't been enough.  The mecha suddenly going dark – collapsing under the strain of overtaxed systems even as the last of the monster's fell.  Leaving First Aid truly alone in that cockpit of horrors for the first time.
Another rumble sounds in the distance, shaking First Aid from his reflection.
He refocuses on the present, pushing himself to his feet and stumbling towards Vortex's head.  He raps his knuckles against the glass of the visor, shouts at the mecha to wake up. 
Nothing.
Vortex has gone dark.
This is not good.  He is dead.  They are dead, if Vortex cannot wake.  Because those distant rumbles are definitely not friendly.
No human has survived fighting the aliens without a mech.  And first Aid is a medic first.  Vortex is the fighter – the killer – of their strange partnership.  First Aid doesn't know what the aliens do to the mecha and pilots that go missing from the battlefield and are never recovered.  And he doesn't intend to find out.
But he does know what the science team will do with Vortex – a billion dollar prototype gone wrong – out of control and now offline.  They will take the mecha apart, dissect him, strip him down to his basest components to find out where it all went wrong.  And when they're done, what's left will be scrap – pieces repurposed into other mecha repairs.
They might build a new prototype top-of-the-line killing machine 2.0.  But is won't be Vortex.
First Aid hates that.  Because he should hate Vortex, after all the other has put him through.  But he doesn't.  Because before all that, Vortex had saved him.  Vortex chose him – kept First Aid alive and safe, even as he's shown countless times just how easily he could destroy Aid.
And Vortex is…was…could be alive – a mecha with a consciousness all his own in a way First Aid had not believed until he experienced it first-hand.
Out of ignorance, out of fear, out of hate, or simply because of the harsh realities of war – the others will kill Vortex (if he isn't already dead; please don't be dead) and never realize what they have done, because they never recognized that he was alive to begin with.  Never saw him as anything more than a glitch, an aberration in their perfect war design.
First Aid has a duty to save lives.  He cannot – will not – let that happen.  Vortex is his.  In death as much as in life.
The rumbling grows closer, close enough First Aid can imagine he hears the slithering of tentacles along walls underneath it. 
He will not let any other – alien or human – take Vortex from him, not while he still lives.
The cables on the ground throw up another flurry of sparks – casting eerie shadows across Vortex's frame.  First Aid's eyes fixate on the light, tracing the path of the wiring from where it snakes across the floor back up to the housing on the wall.  A broken main charging cable for a mech.
Maybe…just maybe…
It's a terrible idea.  So many things could go wrong – electrocution, a gruesome death, ending up a mindless shell on life support for the rest of his days (not so different from how Vortex already is now).  Pharma or Ratchet or any other medic would tell him as much.  They would tell him that there's almost no chance of powering on a mecha once it's gone fully dark, that it isn't worth risking himself too (and particularly not for this mecha).
For anyone else that might be true, but by now First Aid is used to a little risk.  Risk of electrocution and death?  Just another average day on the job.  No different than what Vortex puts him through every time he straps into the pilot seat.  The only thing that's different now is that Aid is choosing to take the risk.
Because there is a chance.  And First Aid is going to take it.
The rubber insulation of the cable is already in his hand when he looks down, his body having carried him to it as his mid was busy shutting out the doubts every other medic would have said.
Something bangs against the collapsed wall blocking entry to the hangar, sending a shower of dust outward.
First Aid hefts the cable over his shoulder, careful to keep the sparking end far in front of him, and begins the trek across the warehouse.  His shoulder burns from the extra weight on an already stressed joint and his legs protest as he forces them to twist and jump to avoid the pools of fluid that would cause instant electrocution if they came into contact with his body and the cable.
The aches don't matter.  He is a medic.  He can carry his own weight and still have the strength to lift up others.  He can do this.  He will do this.
First Aid is gasping for breath by the time he reaches Vortex again.  His sides ache, lungs burning with each breath.  He mentally adds checking for the possibility of bruised ribs to his catalogue of injuries, then shoves the pain aside to focus fully on Vortex's frame.
First Aid eyes the power node at the back of the mecha's neck and before he can think twice, shoves the broken power cable into it.  Sparks fly around the junction and Vortex's frame jolts, lights flickering briefly, then stills.  First Aid pulls the cable away, then hits Vortex again.  And again.  And again.  Lights flicker.  Sparks fly.  Dust showers around First Aid.  Electricity jolts through Vortex's frame.
"Come on," First Aid mutters as Vortex's lights stay on a full second after he pulls the cable away before stuttering out again.
He takes a deep breath and throws the cable directly into the center of Vortex's chest, where the mecha's primary batter is housed.  Sparks fly across Vortex's frame, lights flicker, flash bright white, then stabilize to a dim red glow.
First Aid's momentary relief shatters as Vortex moves and he feels a gust of air from a cold metal blade passing just over his head.  There's a dull thunk, and then fluid is pouring down on First Aid, coating him in a thick sludge of blood from the alien that First Aid reckons was looming just behind him, judging by the bright green eyeball that falls from above to land in a spatter at his feet.
First Aid looks up at Vortex looming over him, gloving red light pouring out from the maw of the cockpit and laughs, shaking hysterically as a hand reaches down to scoop him up from the ground.
They are alive.  He is Vortex's.  Vortex is his.  They are alive.
D-dont. Don't make me even more feral about them than I already am. Don't. I was GOING TO SLEEP BUT NOW MY BRAIN WON'T STOP WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO ME HOW AM I GONNA PRETEND TO BE NORMAL NOW WH
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chocoqtelle · 1 day ago
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inner child pac reading
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🦀 pile one,,
I know we're used to being super helpful, but it's good to help yourself too. you should always make sure you're okay first. It's important for us to be okay, even if other people don't think so. we should think so. things are gonna be okay for us. they always are. I want to do the things we like. I don't understand why you care about what people think now. I think we should try doing what we like more, even if it's embarrassing. it doesn't have to take a lot of time. it's just good to have fun sometimes. maybe you can get back into some of our old interests if you want?
it seems like this pile had to mature quickly and was overly generous in childhood. this likely led to some people pleaser habits. when the world said "be nice" and "care about others" you took it to heart, but it felt like you were the only one who did. you felt like you had to be the adult in your childhood and care for other people around you. for some of you, you may have had to care for a parental/older familiar figure or your siblings. you're used to changing your words and your personality to be more digestible and gentle because this strong fear of conflict. you were scared of people being mean to you, so you avoided making anyone mad. it was like you were always tiptoeing over eggshells. now, you don't have to, so there's no point in worrying about people who don't worry about you. you'd be doing yourself and your inner child a favor by doing what you want. it might feel wrong to be yourself, but at least try. I won't delve too much into this part, but I believe some people in this pile also dealt with being oversexualized or being hyper sexual at a young age. I think it's important to know you're more than what you can give others for this pile. please also take a break for the love of god.
🐸 pile two,,
It's hard to feel loved if nobody shows you. at the same time, i don't think I'd want to be loved. it seems weird and uncomfortable. I'm not used to it so it's scary. I still wish that someone would care at least. it feels like nobody else cares. I'm really tired of things being silent and boring all the time. I want to do something fun. I want friends but I want to be by myself. people think I'm weird, but I think they're the weird ones. they can avoid me but I wouldn't wanna be friends with them anyway. it doesn't matter if it's lonely, I don't feel less lonely around people anyway. some people think I'm mean. I don't think I'm mean. i heard I look mean or I act mean sometimes, but what if that's just who I am? I don't try to be mean to people. I just don't want people to hurt me.
holy neglect trauma... there's a lot to unpack here 😓 first off, I hope you're alright. it seems like this pile never really learned how to interact with people and is probably still a bit of a people hater. this pile has had to keep strong boundaries and walls on to protect themselves from unfamiliar experiences (being spoken to positively.) if you've never experienced something, it can be scary but you have to stop thinking every little thing is gonna go wrong in your life. it's fine. separate note but I think someone's ancestors are very present here, might want to connect with them if you don't already. you can try to shut down the feelings of loneliness and pretend connection won't help but it does. you're probably not connected with your inner child or you're ashamed of yourself for some reason. trying to be cold won't undo anything or save you from the feelings you're hiding. you'll have to acknowledge them at some point. escapism and forcing ignorance wont help forever. hopefully it'll be sooner than later, but that's your choice. it's okay to be soft, btw.
🐕 pile three,,
I know what I'm talking about. I'm serious. I wish people would take me more seriously. i get good grades, I study hard, I always prove how smart I am. for some reason, people still act like I'm too young and stupid to have opinions or that what I say is just silly, especially with emotions. they act like having emotions makes you a less rational person. some people look down on me for who I am, too. it's not something I can change. whether it's gender, age, or whatever, people always want an excuse to ignore how I feel or what I have to say. I know I'm right though. I don't want us to stop expressing ourselves. I wanna share how I feel to the world.
this pile is extremely opinionated and knows how to share their emotions. this pile is for the "bossy" kids who "should have been lawyers" or "a CEO" according to every adult around them. you were emotional as a child and it was always ignored or joked off as if your feelings were invalid. this pile is definitely natural-born leaders so if you aren't/never have been aspiration-driven or "extra" this pile probably isn't yours. the most healing thing you can do for yourself at this point is speak up. continue to speak about everything. share your opinion more, it's safe now and people will actually take you seriously. be emotional, be too much, be annoying, be talkative, be over-opinionated, be everything you feel like being and don't let anyone talk you out of it. lead your life how you want to. call everything out, even if it means being weird. I definitely feel like some people in this pile had the gifted kid experience or liked to read a lot when they were younger. there's also some unresolved anger that might need to be taken care of. I think speaking up more instead of bottling feelings up will definitely help that, though. you're not stupid or weak for being emotional. just be yourself unapologetically and that's the best thing you can do for your younger self.
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miaoua3 · 1 day ago
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Hello! Can you write an sfw/nsfw headcannon version for soonyoung pls? Love your writing!🫰
hii! ofc i can, it would be my pleasure, i hope you enjoy this!
Husband! Hoshi Headcanons
•(sfw! hcs):
we all already know that he’s a cuddle bug, but the extent that his need to be touching you goes to is beyond what any of us could imagine. he’s constantly up in your space, touching you in any way possible. if you are doing chores around the house, instead of helping you by doing something, he will just hang onto your shirt and follow you around, talking animatedly. if you are sitting down, you better expect for his head to be resting on your shoulder
whenever he needs something, he just calls for you (aka screams “baaaabee!”through the house until you hear him and come to him lmao), doesn’t matter that most of the times the thing that he’s looking for is right in front of him, he’s a bit blind sometimes (or so he tells, in reality he does it because he finds your annoyed little pout so adorable)
instead of kissing, he loves to often rub your noses together as a sign of affection, something about just feels so silly and cute and domestic to him he can rarely resist the urge to do it, plus you always smile so brightly whenever he does it so its a win-win situation
he loves that with you he can be as childish and silly as he wants, that you will always join him in his silly missions to make everyone laugh, that you will always laugh along with him no matter how ridiculous and stupid his jokes are. he loves that you are his youth quite literally, and that with you along his side, he can climb on top of the world
three words: matching tiger pyjamas. you didn’t have much of a choice, really, he just bought them for you two one day, and as you tried to let him down gently, his big brown puppy eyes looked at you pleadingly, ready to say “please?” as you were about to refuse him, and suddenly you just sighed in defeat. so guess which pyjamas you two wear the majority of the month, except for the few says it takes to wash and dry them?
compliments you all the time-both when he intends to and when he isn’t even aware that what he said is considered a compliment. for example, if you are getting ready, doing your makeup or taking it off, he will just come behind you, hug you and while smiling say “you are so very pretty, the prettiest in this whole wide world. i must’ve saved korea as a nation in my past life to get the honour of having you in this life.”, or for the times when he is unaware of it-you were just looking at some flowers as you were walking through a botanic garden when he said “i don’t know much about flowers, but whenever i see this flower (points to a, say, hibiscus), it reminds me of you, because you both are so pretty and look so gentle.” bro isn’t even trying yet he got you crying
loves loves LOVES surprising you with at-home picnics, just as you walk through the door of your house, he’s running towards you, taking your hand so he can lead you to the living room where the stuff is all set up-the white bedsheet handing from two chairs, under the sheet fairy lights wrapped around the chairs, a blanket on the floor with lots and lots of food spread on it. he loves how it always makes you smile and how easy it is to make you happy
•(nsfw! hcs):
has stamina of a BEAST, like it isn’t enough that he seemingly gets boners all the time, the sight of your collarbones is enough to make him hug your from behind, slowly grinding his hips against your ass while he mumbles “please babe, lemme make you feel good hm? it’s been so long since i’ve fucked you, let me make you cum on my dick” (btw it hasn’t even been that long, you two had sex two days prior but ok lmao). the moment he sees you close your eyes, he knows he’s won. cue at least 3 hours of him pounding into you, his skin slapping against yours, both your skins burning from the force they meet. at some point you feel so exhausted that you just lay there, face in the pillow, while he holds your hips in the air as he fucks you from behind
is so enthusiastic about eating you out that he overstimulates you, not only are his fingers fast inside of your pussy, but he’s sucking on your clit so hard, it makes tears fall from your eyes very easily. he just wants you to feel so good (but also to squirt all over his face) that he can spend hours just lapping at your juices, mumbling “c’mom pretty girl, just one more, make a mess on my face, that’s what it’s for, it’s for you to sit on it and make yourself cum on it” bsjqbsjqkq
speaking of-dirty talk with him goes CRAAAZY, not even because he wants it to, he just says whatever it’s on his mind, his thoughts a mess thrown up the moment they appear in his mind. he’s a moaning mess, sucking hickeys into your skin, kissing you sloppily, all while he’s repeating “pussy so good, fuck, want to stay here forever. want to cum inside of you all the time, to make you full with my cum-shit, ahh, so tight, im gonna-“ cue more moaning and whining as he nears his end
on the same note- breeding kink. we all know that one clip where he said he wants a whole football team (thank you scoups for the metaphor lmao). and even now, he often talks about getting married and having kids, so i think the moment he put that ring on you, he got down to BUSINESS. i’m talking he soaks your pussy AND your sheets with hair cum, if he could, he would make you wear a plug so none of it spills out and that it’s 100% sure that you end up pregnant from it. the thoughts of your heavy, full and lactating breasts, your round belly, and a little girl that has a smile just like yours, haunt his dreams on the daily
he is unintentionally so rough, like not only does he manhandle you into positions that he needs you in, if you are too far gone to be listening to him, he will just grab you by your neck to get your attention, or pull on your hair so you can watch him fuck you in the mirror, eyes trained on your gaping mouth and bouncing tits. the thing is- he doesn’t do it out of the need to be dominant, it’s just that it’s a part of his fantasy, of exactly what he imagined for that night to be, so if you aren’t following it, he will take the matter into his own hands (quite literally).
he isn’t really sure why, but he loves it when you end up crying from the overstimulation and pleasure, and when you mascara runs down your cheeks. you just look so ruined, and it makes him feel so good and smug that he’s the only one that has the honour of seeing you sobbing for him to both stop and to cum inside of you, the only one who gets to squish your mascara stained cheeks together and make you focus on him, the only one that makes your legs tremble and shake every day. the only one that gets to fuck a baby into you. the only one you crave.
(act surprised for this one) he is low-key into collars. he isn’t all that sure about leashes, but a pretty little collar wrapped around your pretty neck? and if it has a heart shaped buckle? he is a goner. he won’t ever recover from the amount of fantasy material the sight gives him, how primal it makes him feel. plus the look you make whenever he puts two fingers through that heart shaped buckle and pulls you towards him by it? it will literally make him kneel in front of a god and thank him for that sight (not really something he should discuss with a god, yknow, given that it’s about your sex life and all that but eh, whatever lol)
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transgenderer · 2 days ago
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Would it be ethical to let your children starve to death if you donated all their meals to charity?
Let’s say I have a child that needs surgery, he’s got a disease, he’s gonna die, my insurance company won’t cover it, I’ll need to pay out of pocket, I ask the doctor how much it will be, he says “5k.” What is more moral:
A) spend 5k getting my own child the surgery
B) send 5k to AMF to give anti-malarial nets to Africans
I don’t have another 5k saved up, so it’s one or the other
so, i think these two asks are of a kind, but the latter is neater, so ill answer the latter primarily, with the obvious implications for the former
so, this is a tough question! i think theres a lot of explanations you can come up with, for why your own child is more important. perhaps most significantly, no one else cares about your child, but other people care about as much as you about the statistical african child youre saving. obv problems there, but theres an argument. you could also make all sorts of practical calculations ("calculations") that say the net benefit is higher with your child, whatever, its actually not important
i dont think any of that stuff is the real reason. real reason, is that you care about your child more than you care about the african child, and you want to act in accordance with what you care about. and i dont think thats wrong! or, to the extent that it is "wrong", ethics isn't doing what we want it to. i think ethics, insofar as it is a decision theory, has to include self-interest. that trying to remove self-interest from a decision theory is a...mathematical toy example, and not what ethics is really for or about. so yeah, help your kid! but youre not helping your kid out of altruism, youre helping your kid out of self-interest, and that's fine! the same way its fine to do all the other things out of self-interest.
but there's this other thing, actual altruism, helping people because you think its the right thing to do, even though it will never benefit you outside of warm fuzzies (which, if you were willing to accept delusion, you could get easier), and that thing is valuable, and important, and the human mind must be constantly dragged towards it. but its not the only thing. there are at least two poles in any ethical system i can accept, a pole towards the self and a pole towards the universal Good, and every ethics must be stuck in the tug between them. there might be other poles to. beauty, probably. community, maybe, although i think community is actually just long-term (like, over the course of a life, not long term as in 1000 years) self-interest (which is fine).
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viraliz · 2 days ago
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Im going to say what some OP fans don't have the courage to say! It's strange how Law is more touched by Cora's death more than his own parents (which in itself brings a very different depth to their relationship, which as I said several times, far from father and son).
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"But Cora died to save him!" alright, he could be grateful but not spend the rest of his life worshipping that man.
Besides, before their 6 months together, i must remind you, he hated him.
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How does he accept the death of his parents who died thanks to the government so well but directs all his anger at Doflamingo because of that one man.
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The fact that Corazon himself was in the navy should be at least astounding, a shock. But that doesn't change Law's love for him at all.
Having said all that, there is this air of unresolved issues around them.
- Law couldn't say he loved him
- He still talks to Cora
- "bring Cora back" (you honestly really wanted that).
- these "WHAT IF he was alive" parallels
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Is it possible that more will come from Cora and Law in this final stretch of One Piece? Of course, that doesn't mean he'll come back to life but maybe there will be more memories? anything to close this chapter? Or will Law carry Cora's memory alive and well forever? (I hope so)
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raccoonhusband · 17 hours ago
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This was a great video! But I noticed that you saw the line "Maybe he can still prove his worth to me," in Journal 3 as being out of character for Ford? But I see it as supremely in character, at least for that point in his life, especially on how it relates to one of the core themes of conditional vs unconditional love. The way I see it, thanks to Filbrick and various other factors in his life, Ford's been taught that love is transactional. He's internalized this, but it's not really how he works at his truest self. We know that because despite his attempts to "control his emotions and be logical", and despite all his anger and betrayal, he can't turn that unconditional love he had for Stan off. We see it in how he instantly has love for his niece and nephew the moment he finds out they exist. But he's definitely internalized that love should be transactional, so at the time of the portal incident he believes maybe if Stan jumps through these hoops for him, this will not only save the world but this will mend things between them! Instead, it's what could have killed it for good. Seeing as it's the splitting off point of the Better World AU, and from the comments Rob Renzetti made in your interview with him on what could be Stan's fate in this AU, the defining moment here is: Does Stan still believe in this unconditional love and try to get through to Ford even if it's by lashing out or does he let that belief die and take the journal, with Stan and Ford never reconciling and getting material success at the cost of everything else?
This theme of conditional vs unconditional love runs through the entire show. This is why Stan and Bill are foils (Bill is literally the personification of conditions) and the end of Ford's arc is Stan showing him what true unconditional love looks like. That's why seeing that, realizing the scope of what he lost, and seeing Mabel's unwavering love overcoming everything and bringing Stan back is what it takes for Ford to finally, finally throw his father's worldview in the trash where it belongs.
youtube
What we can’t woobify, we vilify. What we can’t vilify, we diagnose. And sometimes, in the Gravity Falls fandom, we do all three.
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decaffeinatedcandycane · 1 day ago
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Everyone talks about being survivalist, love that btw, but nobody talks about Zombie! Reader.
But not any zombie - a human like one.
So human, a horde almost ate them, because they were too much human and too less - a fucking zombie. Of course, the rotting smell deterred them.
Imagine what life would be like?
Not needing to eat, breathe, not feeling warm, cold, etc. Just a rotting corpse, able to walk, talk and instead of looking for supplies, you are looking for a way to keep your body up.
The rotting process stops after some time, but you can still break. It doesn't hurt, but it is inconvenient.
Somehow, somehow you found a way to become 100 % human on the outside and convince survivors, you are one - for some time, of course.
Just for a quick chat. You hate eating flesh, so you are not tempted to eat anyone.
And you meet the task force and they "save" you from zombies. And.. and you try to run away, but they try to convince you to stay in their base.
For the plot, a zombie follows you to the base and calls a horde there.
You successfully stop them and reveal your zombie self, making zombie communication sounds, convincing the horde you are all advanced zombies.
The zombies leave and just as you try to slip away, the boys muzzle you down and question you relentlessly.
They figure you are not threat, since you just want to run away, but are convinced you brought the zombie that started this.
One of them already fell for you. Another though you are their friend. None of them want to let you go and some weird scientists wants you to try and create a cure, or at least, a sentient zombies. (Maybe they will turn out like you and not eat human flesh?)
This will include torture, which the boys cannot allow. Yes, you won't feel it, physically, but you will go insane, for sure.
I don't know. I am on some zombie apocalypse lane lately.... But, yeah.
Love the trope of Zombie! Reader x Task force 141 and sprinkle some serious drama on that shit.
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crimson-and-clover-1717 · 17 hours ago
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The Erasing of Ed’s Personhood (again).
Some interpretations of Stede and Izzy during the Rhys and Con Q&A at SFROP didn’t sit well with me.
There’s sexual frisson between Stede and Izzy in the candle scene
What canon shows: That Stede flatters Izzy into mentoring him in a similar way Ed uses flattery in 104 when telling Izzy he could be the Captain of the Revenge. It’s knowing your audience and what motivates them. But this isn’t flirting on Stede’s part. It’s emotionally intelligent leadership.
This alleged sexual frisson takes place immediately after Stede has found Ed, the love of his life, whom he has been desperately trying to find for months. For whom he has willingly given everything up. Stede cannot see another man for Ed. Stede’s whole love and sexual awakening is built around Ed. He’s Ed-emotional, Ed-sexual.
And we’re meant to believe the moment Stede is out of Ed’s presence - Ed, who has massive trust issues - that there’s a mutual homoerotic moment between Stede and Izzy, because Izzy has his shirt off and Stede says some dubiously flattering things? It’s reductive towards Ed and mocking of his character. It’s actually an incredibly cruel interpretation. It isn’t the show. It. just. isn’t. the. show.
Izzy is a good mentor to Stede
What canon shows: Stede ‘being the captain’ by asking Izzy to mentor him. Stede is putting into practice ‘keep your friends close and enemies closer’ by trying to give Izzy a role. The devil makes work for idle Izzy Hands, so keep him busy. But punching someone in the stomach, yelling at them, and telling them they have such a total lack of skills you don’t know how they’re still alive… when they rescued your sorry ass two nights previous!…does not a mentor make. And Stede doesn’t learn anything useful really. I mean at least he learned something that saved his life with Ed even if it was through flirting. The fact Stede also seems to enjoy some of Izzy’s approval doesn’t make Izzy a good mentor either. It makes Stede someone who is still wrestling with his identity, and reconciling differing aspects of his masculinity. Stede’s parental trauma causes him to attach too much significance to it.
That Stede and Izzy caused Ed’s decline and have equal responsibility for fixing the man they both love (this one boiled my piss).
What canon shows: Ed is devastated by Stede not turning up at the dock. Ed then processes some of this in a reasonably healthy way — curling up under blankets, eating marmalade, writing doggerel, talking to a friend, crying, showing pain publicly, exploring shared feelings, making a plan to feel better through art (singing), and tidying up his room. Ed is attempting to put into practice Stede’s philosophy: beauty, aestheticism, art as therapy, open emotions, talking it through.
We can’t know what would’ve happened next because the narrative doesn’t bend that way, but without Izzy’s intervention, what Ed doesn’t do is fall into the Kraken spiral. Ed is pretty much forced to a shuddering emotional halt, mid-catharsis - that in itself causes further trauma. Many therapists will tell you that stopping emotional work suddenly can be worse than never beginning at all. On top of that suppression, Ed now fears harm might be done to him should he appear weak. To say Stede and Izzy are equally responsible for Ed’s Kraken spiral is just not true.
Second, Ed isn’t an object to be fixed. Ed isn’t something to be moulded or unfolded. Ed isn’t the exotic plaything of two white men. Ed isn’t a toy or cipher or prize to be won between a bourgeois hero and some proletariat antagonist. Ed really just needs to be left the fuck alone so he can develop some self-actualisation. Let him try his innkeeper dream and fail. Let him see the world doesn’t end when he does. I truly believe Stede is the only individual who can give Ed the room and psychological safety to explore a range of human emotion and identities, as well as providing that soft place to fall when Ed inevitably needs it. And it isn’t even that Ed needs to fix himself. He just needs to be allowed to breathe and be and exist in all his human messiness, judgment-free, fear-free.
That Stede’s crying as Izzy dies shows how much he has grown to care about Izzy, that there is mutual respect, and Stede is left devastated.
What canon shows: That Stede CRIES! He cries all of the time. And I have championed this over and over. He cries in 13/18 episodes. He makes it safe for others to cry. Crying is Stede’s superpower. It helps him process emotions healthily. Stede, I believe, is crying when Izzy dies for the following reasons:
Because he’s Stede
Because he’s the Captain and he didn’t get everyone out alive (doesn’t matter the great Israel Hands can’t check a pocket for weapons).
Because Ed is devastated, and Stede loves Ed
Because Stede isn’t a colossal prick. He says ‘poor bugger’ towards Chauncey moments after escaping execution. Stede’s an empath. Stede understands the pity of it all. Stede can see the intrinsic value in most people, even Izzy. That doesn’t tell me anything about Izzy, but everything about Stede. And it doesn’t make Izzy special to Stede. It makes humans special to Stede.
Why these misinterpretations upset me so much is what it does to the validity of Ed’s characterisation. The idea there’s a sexual ‘knowing’ behind Ed’s back between the two white guys which they choose not to act upon because they decide to work together to objectify and ‘fix Ed’ instead. The idea that Izzy is a better mentor and influence than Ed. The objectification of Ed as a thing to be fixed then won. The appropriation of Ed’s emotional confusion over Izzy’s death being overlaid onto Stede also. Because Ed can’t have his own unique character arc in anything it seems. I just want Ed’s characterisation and personhood to stop being erased.
I’m still sleep-deprived so I hope this makes sense. It’s taken me a while to process.
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peace-hunter · 2 days ago
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While in battle what do the primes mostly do? Just sit N watch
yeah kinda!
unfortunately they're very limited on what they can actually do beyond giving some advice when required, which is a source of frustration for everyone involved. being forced to stand on the sidelines without being able to physically help out rapidly becomes one of their least favorite things about being bound to the matrix.
the first time Optimus gets badly hurt during battle and they realize there's absolutely nothing they can do about it is,,, Rough.
they do get to become Optimus' second (thirteenth?) pair of eyes though. literally nothing happens around him without them seeing it. he very quickly gets a reputation for having crazy reflexes and it's really hard to catch him off-guard but it's because he has thirteen ghosts following him around at all times and they're hyper-aware of anything that gets close to OP.
there's a learning curve of how much they can chime in during battle without distracting OP and making things worse, but they get the hang of it eventually. and OP learns to trust them implicitly too, following their warnings with no hesitation, which saves his life more times than he can count.
it is a little freaky for everyone around him, but they kinda get used to it. things are already so goddamn weird around here anyway.
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nyashykyunnie · 2 days ago
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˗ˏˋ Entry : 049 - Lover! Jinwoo x Fem! Reader: Trichotillomania ◛⑅·˚ ༘ ♡ ˎˊ
ₓ˚. ୭ ˚○◦˚𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕘 𝕁𝕚𝕟𝕨𝕠𝕠˚◦○˚ ୧ .˚ₓ
[ Trichotillomania: Repeated hair pulling habits from stress, anxiety and depression. Do not engage with this fic if you are in a poor mental health state. Familial abuse. Physical abuse. Body Dysmorphia. Depression. Suicidal Ideation. Trichotillomania can be considered as a form of self harm. Other variations of self-harm is in heavy description. Ends in fluff ]
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╰┈➤ ❝ [ Just Somewhere to Hide. Just somewhere. Anywhere. ] ¡! ❞
The only thing that's stopping you from ending things right now is that there is a lack of a knife present in your hands.
The kitchen is just a few steps away. Just one thrust into your heart and it's off to the comfortable embrace of death itself.
But you can't risk that, there's no spot in this godforsaken house you're imprisoned in for a peaceful death. Every corner of the walls around you is a death sentence to invite panic attacks in.
Why can't everyone just shut up and leave you be?
It's not like it's your fault you can't get into fucking college because of the tuition fee. Aren't you saving everyone's fucking wallets from that bullshit?
No one should give a fuck about your lack of education, you can enroll by the time the expenses die down.
You shouldn't have been here in the first place anyway. If it weren't for that single night you wouldn't be born.
But ah, life has a wonderful way of fucking up everything.
You grew pampered, with food served to you in rich flavors and huge amounts. You're thankful for that, you're thankful for the lovely childhood.
Oh how you wish to go back to those days.
But do you really?
Childhood may have been lovely but underneath all the glitters and rainbows were belts and hangers and brooms used to discipline you?
Can't spell a word right?
A smack from a fist.
Can't do your math right?
A smack from a hanger.
Can't translate between two languages fast enough?
A smack from the wood of a broom.
Can't do an essay right?
A smack with a belt.
Maybe childhood isn't lovely either.
Where was the place that you could hide yourself away? School.
Yes.
As much as you hated that place for all it's shitty standards it was a safe place. At least there you can pretend, at least there you can have some form of isolation even if you're being bullied and mocked for how you look and your voice sounds.
It's fine that you undergo discrimination and bullying, at least they're not swinging belts and brooms at you. It's just them destroying your self-esteem.
Not like you have any to begin with thanks to your parents who were even more brutal about your appearance that you now have body dysmorphia on tip of depression and anxiety.
Even if school is a place where teachers normalize humiliating students shamelessly for basic wrongdoings that can be corrected with simple warnings.
Even though that place is full of people who only respect you when they need something out of you, even if that place is a paradise for the pretty girls and a hell for those who don't fit the beauty standard— That place felt safer than anywhere else.
All your life you've never been given privacy because of your privilege. You're luckier than your cousins who have it harder, so be thankful.
But at one point you started wishing for your places to be switched. It's fine that you eat food that is burnt and poorly cooked, it's fine that you have to eat shitty food.
If it meant you can have a little more breather instead of getting anxious that you might have done something to earn the belt— It's fine.
You'd rather starve than anything else.
At some point in your life you started to pull your hair out. It started from a few strands. But all of the sudden there are clumps of hair gathered on the floors.
What did you get instead of receiving help?
A beating.
That's right, a beating.
You got your hair yanked, pinned to the floor, and slapped repeatedly on your helpless situation. When your aggressor was pried off of you— You got kicked on your already helpless situation.
In the end who is the one who asks for forgiveness and gaslit that you being pinned down and slapped is justifiable? You.
You.
The helpless you.
The you who isn't allowed to voice your feelings out so you grew to not know how to tell anyone what you really feel, even to the point that you feared telling your feelings is what will doom you into irreversible damage.
You feared your own emotions.
You feared everything you should have been allowed to fear from the years of abuse. The fear bedded into your soul.
Did you want help?
YES.
Fuck yes you did.
What happened instead? You are guilt-tripped into saying no that you don't need a psychiatrist despite the fact you have major social anxiety, severe trichotillomania and heck— You even cut yourself when you can.
Nothing.
Nothing could help you.
Everything is a prison and you yourself are rotten from the inside out.
No one wanted to help you.
Your family?
Right.
They only fucking insist on caring because the image of a severely mentally ill daughter is bad for their image.
Nobody really cared.
Nobody did.
Even if you cry your heart out nobody could help you.
Nobody wanted to help.
No one.
There's no one there.
Not here.
Not there.
Not anywhere.
You're all alone.
In this vast world that you try to paint into a pretty picture in your head— Not one soul wanted to help you.
The embrace of death seems all the more enticing now that you really think about it.
Why fear it?
Death gives you mercy from the agony of living.
Atleast if you're dead— No one ans nothing can hurt you.
You can sleep all you want while your body rots from six feet under.
You've always been rotten anyway.
Dying won't be any different.
Life always ends in slumber, it's about time for you to dream.
⋅ ˚ ₊ ‧ ଳ ‧ ₊ ˚ ⋅ ⋆ ౨ৎ ˚ ⟡ ˖ ࣪
"My liege!" Beru's panicked voice yells out for his master, instantly jolting Jinwoo awake from his small nap after playing a few rounds after homework. "The empress— She's unwell!"
"Exchange"
The command slipped out of Jinwoo's lips in an instant. He knew what was happening.
Even if he doesn't know the full story of what you've been through— He knew the situation is bad as he feels Beru's heightened anxiety.
Jinwoo can technically peer into your memories and see for himself what really happens. But he didn't. He wanted you to tell him what happened in the years you grew up. He wanted you to tell him what pushed you to whatever the hell happened to you today.
He knew about your destructive habits. It was the result of bottling up your emotions for so long that it created a ticking time bomb that will burst at any moment should the right trigger be pulled.
And when Jinwoo finally materializes from the abyss-like wisps of shadows— He would find himself face to face with your figure staring out at the cityscape as you stand on the ledge.
"Stop, wait!" Jinwoo panics, breaking into sweat when he saw you take a stop.
He yanked your arm back in an instant, letting your back crash against his chest. Jinwoo held you firmly as you thrashed and screamed in his hold.
But ah, his strong arms will not let you go.
He refuses to let go. Knowing the moment he does you will take flight and descend to your demise. Still he was hyper aware of his strength, if he so ever squeeze too much and he might kill you.
As you stretched your palm out to yearn for the ledge— Jinwoo uses his to grab hold of yours and pull it back.
"That's not something you should longing for" Jinwoo says, his voice trembling as he uses his other hand to cover your eyes so you wont see it anymore. "A leap of faith is not what you need."
You kept thrashing in his hold, cursing Jinwoo out for daring to interrupt your final farewell.
But soon he would lift his palm up from your eyes.
As your eyesight adjusts back to the waking world— You find yourself no longer on top of the building you were in a second ago.
Instead in front of you is a vast field of grass with blooming flowers swaying back and forth along with the gentle breeze blowing your way.
Once Jinwoo could tell that you're no longer agitated, his hold becomes gentle, and instead he would just hug you from behind as you both sat on the grass.
Your breath was completely taken away by how pretty the sight is. Every single dark thought you had in your little head is instantly washed away by the peaceful and beautiful sight.
The sky itself is majestic, with full and fluffy clouds drifting about and even the stars blinking so prettily along with a meteor shower.
While your gaze is distracted by everything else, Jinwoo's eyes are on you. He could see another bald spot on your head from your hair plucking habits. At the center of it was a huge gaping wound fresh and still bleeding. He blows on it gently, the wound closing instantly and your strands growing back anew as if nothing ever happened in the first place.
"Better?" He finally asks as he nuzzles the side of your head.
"Mhm." You weakly nod, too distracted to really talk properly.
"I know, I know that I can't tell you that everything will get better" Jinwoo holds you softly, holding you tighter. "It'll be stupid for me to try and tell you about rainbows and whatnot."
"..."
"But if you want to run away, if you want to be somewhere far away like this. Just tell me. Don't go hurting yourself, don't think about leaving this world" He goes on.
You can't see him directly, but you knew by the tremble of his voice that he must be crying. And yet Jinwoo pretends to be strong. The one who needs comfort is not him, but you.
"When the world is too cruel on you, when everything is just too painful for your, when you just want to cry— Turn to me." Jinwoo said, no— He was pleading you. "I'll take you here. Just you and me. Just us."
A place of solace.
A paradise for both of you.
A place where no one can hit you, no one can yell at you, a place where you can let your guard down.
The thought of that caused you to break into tears. You wanted to tell him what you feel. What you think. What happened and why you're like this. But instead you only sob.
You can only cry your sorry little heart out, you let out all the screams and tears you've been hiding because you will be guilt-tripped for having emotions. For being weak.
Yet this man wasn't doing any of that. Instead he was rubbing your back as if he understood what you were trying to tell him in your tears.
You don't have to hurt yourself. Not as long as he's here. If it's a hero you need then he will be your saviour. Jinwoo wants to show you that you are loved.
If not by the world, then by him.
He will love you, more than he has now.
The world is beautiful, and you have unfortunately been too exposed to the ugliness of everything. So he will be your beacon of light.
He'll hold your hand and show you everything that should have been shown to you in the first place. He'll pamper you to the point that you'll forget your destructive habits.
After all, those came to life because of your environment.
In the hellhole that you are imprisoned in, he'll pull you out to take you home. A home for you and him.
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꒰ 🪼 A/N: What a way to start my Lover series hahah. I just needed this fic so bad so I'm sorry for introducing my new series like this. If you are in need of professional help please reach out immediately should you are able to. Please don't bottle up your emotions. You're only hurting yourself. If you are unable to reach out to therapists then please talk to your friends or close people for comfort. ꒱
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ʚ(੭´͈ ᐜ `͈)੭ .。✧: ~♡ —! stories written by kyunnie; translations, reposts, plagiarism are strictly forbidden.
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leoleolovesdc · 3 days ago
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Stephanie (at least throught the 90s-00s) had a very discernible violent streak and morals that don’t really line up with tim and the other bats around her. This is kinda lost on modern comics, either because of how much she’s being sidelined or as an attempt to soften her character and make her more likeable, but i genuinely think it was a interesting part to her characer that we should bring back.
Steph is sort of angry and reckless, she became spoiler without any training because she needed to get her father out of her and her mother’s life permanently, and she didn’t care for the implications of what she had to do to get there.
In her debut, you can see how desperate and impatient she is, she was tired of all the harm arthur caused to her family and of the helplessness of never being able to do something about it. It’s just a lot of bottled up anger you can tell she’s been struggling with for years, so when she finally finds a way to channel it onto something good (you can argue on how much good beating up criminals would really do, but this is from steph’s pov) it immediately leads up to her being ready to murder her father on the first opportunity she gets.
And even after bruce convinces stephanie to Not Kill Him, she still expresses multiple times how she doesn’t care for men like her father and saving them is a waste of her time. She is usually pretty willing to let “bad” people die because, as she sees it, their lives aren’t more important then the ones they ruined.
I wouldn’t say steph has very “strong” opinions on murder like jason, for example, does, but she definetly has a detachment to bruce, cass and tim’s morals that end up pushing her into a place of distrust with all of them at some point or another. She is willing to adapt to what her teammates (on the occasions where she did get to feel like a part of a team) expect of her in a mission because she values their opinion of her and wants to receive proper support and training, but it doesn’t make her dislike the kind of people who’s lives she is told to care about any less.
In the short time steph had as robin that trend of loose morals in comparison to the bats really continues, like in that one story where a guy she hit recklessly doesn’t die by pure luck and when bruce is scolding her about it she just goes “he was a serial killer, so really, why should i even care?”, or when she has that talk with batgirl after having to be stopped from beating the shit out of the penguin and ponders a bit about “when does it end? Am i really that wrong for wishing we could just take guys like this out of our lives?”.
It’s a very noticeable highlight on this aspect of stephanie right near the end, and it builds up to when she is fighting fo her life against black mask and finally manages to get the upperhand. It’s not the first time she has someone’s life on her hands but it is the first time she hesitates, maybe because the stakes are higher now, but mainly it’s just because of how guilty she feels for the gang war, for fucking it up with batman and for orpheus’ death. When she lets black mask live it’s not because she thinks it’s the right thing or because she doesn’t want to blow his brains out, it’s out of respect for bruce, because she feels like she already ruined everything, she should have known better and she owes him something, so she does what batman would do. And then that gets her killed.
So, let’s be real, why should i think that after all of this, after her father ruined her mother’s life, after she watched hundreds of children get killed and traumatized by monsters like the penguin, after the one time she tries to follow the damn code it kills her, should she have any notion that murdering is wrong if when she’s looking back on it, killing a bitch would have solved all of her problems from day one?
Being a Stephanie Brown fan is so annoying sometimes because you read about this child consistently trying to commit murder since her literal debut just for some random writer and those “batboys” mfs go around saying that she thinks murder is wrong
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ellswritings · 1 day ago
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I Knew You Were Trouble
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Ex!Evan Buckley x reader
Eddie Diaz x reader
TW: Emotional and physical cheating (from Buck), heartbroken reader, 118 supporting reader, Eddie picking up the pieces, angsty fluff.
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Evan Buckley. The moment his piercing blue eyes showed up at the 118, Y/N knew she was in for it. His flirty smile, the forward flirting, it was hard not to fall for it. Y/N has never been the type to fall for a guy just because he flashes a smile, but something about the way his nose crinkled whenever he grinned at her, it made her heart flutter.
Y/N L/N has always had a strong personality. She was part of the LAPD for five years before going through the Fire academy. She was the best in both of her fields. Always professional, super playful, witty, reasonable, and always down for a good time. That’s why she fit in so well with the team at the 118 when she was placed there. Hen and Chimney were the first two she met, then Captain Bobby Nash came rolling in. He clicked seamlessly with them too. And then… Buck.
On paper, he was perfect. At least in Y/N’s eyes he was. Despite his constant need to go against Bobby’s orders, she could never truly dislike the boy. Did she think he could be irrational and dumb sometimes? Absolutely. But that’s one of the things she found endearing about him.
And that’s also the reason he fell for her. Everyone on the team treated him like some idiot kid who was just a ticking time bomb. But not Y/N. She treated him like an equal, like a partner. Even when he immaturely would flirt with her on shift, tease her, blatantly but playfully check her out, she still never once genuinely got irritated with him.
So when the two of them started dating, the team wasn’t necessarily surprised. It was around that time a new recruit came into the 118. Edmundo Diaz, or as he likes to go by, Eddie. He was the missing piece the 118 needed. It felt like a full fledged family when Eddie showed up. He and Buck didn’t get along at first, but Y/N, being the effervescent force she is, managed to make them get along.
The team was amazing. Going on calls was a breeze because they all just worked so well together. Even team outings were an absolute blast because everyone got along. They are truly one big happy family.
Of course though, Eddie, Buck, and Y/N always had a deeper connection with each other than the others. Perhaps it’s because they’re so close in age, but they truly just clicked. When Eddie originally showed up to the firehouse, he wasn’t oblivious to how genuinely beautiful Y/N is. Her infectious smile and booming laugh would catch any man or woman’s attention. He would have pursued her if Buck hadn’t already won that battle.
They were always relatively professional at the job. Out of the two of them, Buck seemed to have the hardest time keeping his hands off of her. Stealing kisses here and there, smacking her behind when he thinks no one’s looking. They were happy, and anyone with eyes could see it.
At least until Taylor Kelly came into the picture.
When they got the call that her news helicopter had a mechanical failure, no one really thought anything would’ve came out of it. Y/N was pretty much in the midst of all of it, being the one to pull Taylor out of the situation while the rest of the group helped her crew and got the copter under control.
However, despite Y/N saving her life, the redheads attention was solely focused on Buck. Something that not only Y/N noticed, but the rest of the team.
It only got worse when Taylor showed up to the firehouse, claiming she would be following the 118 crew around until she felt comfortable enough to go back into the sky. Not only was Bobby annoyed, but Y/N wasn’t too thrilled to be seeing her around. Especially with the way she’s been paying special attention to her boyfriend.
Now, Y/N has never been the jealous type. She knows Buck is good looking and that other people are bound to think so too. Whenever they go out, there’s always one or two drunk individuals that try to slip him their number, but he’s never entertained any of them. After the whole Abby fiasco, his eyes have only ever been on Y/N.
That’s why she tried her hardest to ignore Taylor’s persistent behavior. She also tried to ignore how much Buck seemed to enjoy the attention. She had to remind herself of how much she loves and trusts Evan Buckley. Still, some reassurance would’ve been nice.
Anytime she’d talk to Hen and Athena about it, they’d share a look before saying that it’s just Buck’s personality. He’s a flirty guy. But that he’s never been as committed to someone as he is to her. That was always nice to hear. Even Chimney and Bobby found small ways to tell her that she has nothing to worry about.
That’s why it stung so much to walk into her apartment, one that she asked Buck to move into to get him out of Abby’s, only to find him and Taylor naked on her couch.
Her entire world crashed down around her that night. Neither of them seemed to even hear her walk in as they were still mid action and didn’t look like they were stopping anytime soon.
Y/N being as quick witted as she is, snapped a photo of their dalliance before spinning on her heel and slamming the door behind her. Anger, hurt, frustration, grief, any emotion someone could think of, she felt it that night. As soon as she got in her car, tears started flowing freely down her face. She had no idea what she was going to do with that photo. Some part of her just knew she needed proof, a reminder of what she just saw. Because she knows as soon as Buck comes crawling back to apologize, she’d forgive him in an instant.
That’s why she picked staying in her car for the night over going back there. Even though it’s her apartment, her safe space, she couldn’t bear going back. Not right now at least. Every single call he made went without an answer, all the texts, emails, all of it. She didn’t even bother to read.
Sleep didn’t come easy for the poor woman. In fact, it didn’t come at all. She simply stared out her front window, arms crossed as she buried herself deeper into her hoodie. So when the sun came out, Y/N couldn’t have been more relieved. Work was the one place where she wouldn’t have to confront this. Maintaining professionalism is of the utmost importance to her, so for the next twelve hours, she can shove all of these issues to the side.
Y/N walked into the 118 station that morning with an air of quiet fury. Her normally upbeat energy was replaced by a stiff, almost mechanical demeanor. The shift in her mood was impossible to miss. Her jaw was set, her eyes distant, and the usual lightness in her step was gone, replaced by rigid, purposeful movements. She walked past the common area without so much as a word, heading straight to the locker room to stow her gear.
The station was never completely quiet, but as Y/N entered, it felt like the atmosphere shifted, as though everyone unconsciously held their breath. Bobby was the first to notice her as she passed by his office.
“Morning, Y/N,” he greeted her, his usual warm smile in place. But Y/N, normally quick with a bright ‘Good morning,’ barely glanced his way.
“Hey, Cap,” she muttered, not slowing her pace. Her voice was flat, a stark contrast to her usual chipper tone.
Bobby frowned, watching her as she moved further into the station. He’d been a captain long enough to know when one of his firefighters was struggling with something, and Y/N’s behavior set off alarm bells in his mind. She wasn’t being rude—she was too professional for that—but her unusually short response made it clear something was off.
Y/N reached her locker, tugging it open with more force than necessary. Her hands moved quickly as she shoved her bag inside, not caring that it landed haphazardly. She was wound so tightly that every movement seemed deliberate, controlled, like she was holding back a flood of emotions threatening to escape.
Hen, who had been watching from the other side of the room, approached carefully. She knew Y/N well enough to see that something was seriously wrong. Normally, Y/N would joke about the early mornings or make some witty comment to lighten the mood, but today, she was all business.
“Hey, Y/N,” Hen said softly, leaning against the lockers beside her. “You okay?”
Y/N paused, her hands gripping the edge of her locker door for a moment before letting out a sharp exhale. “Yeah, I’m fine,” she replied curtly, closing the locker with a loud clang.
Hen didn’t buy it, and neither did the rest of the team, who were now quietly exchanging glances from across the room. Chimney, watching from the doorway, nudged Eddie.
“Something’s definitely up,” Chim whispered. “She doesn’t look like she’s slept.”
Eddie’s gaze was fixed on Y/N, his brows furrowed in concern. She was usually the first to crack a joke, the one to bring energy into the room, but today, her whole demeanor was different. She was stiff, guarded, and Eddie could see the tension in her shoulders, the way she was holding herself together with an almost frightening precision.
“Y/N,” Eddie called out softly as he approached. “You sure you’re okay?”
Y/N glanced at him briefly before looking away, her lips pressed into a thin line. She appreciated the concern, but she didn’t want to get into it—not here, not now. “I’m fine, Eddie,” she said, her voice clipped but not harsh.
Eddie didn’t push, though his eyes stayed on her, worry etched in every line of his face. He knew Y/N well enough to know that ‘fine’ wasn’t fine at all.
As Y/N moved through the rest of her morning routine, the tension around her only grew. Her movements were brisk, efficient, but there was a hardness to her that wasn’t normally there. She didn’t engage in small talk, didn’t banter with the team like usual. The shift in her behavior was like a cloud hanging over the station, and everyone could feel it.
Then Buck walked in, his entrance loud and hurried, as though he was already feeling the weight of the guilt on his shoulders. He looked disheveled, like he hadn’t slept, and his eyes immediately locked onto Y/N.
Her entire body tensed the moment he entered. She could feel his presence without even looking at him, the air between them thick with unresolved tension. She didn’t want to deal with this right now—especially not at work. But Buck, clearly desperate to make things right, approached her anyway.
“Y/N, can we talk? Please?” Buck’s voice was quiet but urgent as he moved toward her.
Y/N stiffened even more, her back straightening as she turned to face him. Her eyes were cold, and her lips pressed into a tight, thin line. “Now’s not the time or place, Evan.”
He flinches at the cold use of his first name, “Please, Y/N, I just… I need to explain,” he said, his voice cracking slightly as he took another step closer.
Y/N tenses, her grip tightening around the locker door. She swallows hard, mortified that he’s bringing this up here, in front of everyone. She glances around and sees Chimney and Eddie looking at Buck with something akin to disgust. Hen’s brow is furrowed in confusion, and even Bobby has stopped pretending to read the morning paper.
Y/N hesitated, hating that he’s cornering her in the only other place she thought she’d be safe. The woman was trying so hard to stay professional, but he wasn’t making it easy. She could feel the eyes of everyone in the station on her, and the last thing she wanted was to make a scene.
“Fine,” she muttered through gritted teeth, motioning for him to follow her to a quieter corner of the station.
Once they were away from the rest of the team, Buck wasted no time. “Y/N, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean for any of this to happen.”
Y/N’s eyes flashed with anger, her composure slipping just a little. “You didn’t mean for it to happen?” she repeated, her voice low and dangerous. “You’re telling me you just accidentally ended up screwing Taylor on my couch?”
Buck winced at her words, his guilt written all over his face. “I—I wasn’t thinking. I was confused.”
“Confused?” Y/N’s voice was sharper now, her anger bubbling to the surface. “That’s your excuse? You didn’t know what you were doing?”
“I was in a bad headspace, Y/N. It just—” Buck struggled for words, clearly not understanding how badly he was making things. “It didn’t mean anything. You and me, we’re the real thing. That with Taylor… it was just a mistake.”
Y/N’s eyes widened, disbelief and fury warring in her chest. “A mistake?” she echoed, her voice trembling with the effort of holding back her rage. “No,” she scoffs. “No. No, a mistake is when you lose your keys. What you did was make a blatant choice without thinking of the consequences.”
Buck’s face flushed, and he shifted uncomfortably under her gaze. “I didn’t mean for it to happen like this. Please, I can’t lose you.”
“You should’ve thought about that before you cheated on me!” Y/N snapped, her voice rising. The anger she had been holding back all morning finally erupted, spilling out into the open. Her words echoed through the station, drawing the attention of everyone around them.
Buck’s face paled as he realized the entire team had heard her outburst. He looked around, embarrassment flooding him, but Y/N didn’t care. She was too angry, too hurt to worry about how this looked.
“Y/N—”
“No, Buck!” she yelled, her hands trembling as she tried to hold back the tears threatening to spill over. “You don’t get to do this! You don’t get to stand here and pretend like it didn’t mean anything. You cheated on me. You lied to me. And now you want me to just… what? Forgive you because it didn’t ‘mean anything’?” She shakes her head, failing at stopping herself from making the situation worse. “You try to act like you’ve changed, but you’re still the same freakin’ playboy who had sex with every girl who paid him the slightest bit of attention.”
The station was dead silent. The rest of the team, though trying not to stare, couldn’t help but listen to every word.
Buck’s mouth opened and closed as he struggled for a response, but nothing came out. The weight of Y/N’s words seemed to hit him all at once, and the guilt that had been simmering beneath the surface came crashing down on him.
Before Buck could say anything else, Y/N shook her head, her voice breaking. “I can’t do this anymore. I– I just– I can’t. We’re done.”
And with that, she turned on her heel and walked away, her heart pounding, her face flushed with a mix of anger and embarrassment.
The silence in the station hung heavy until Hen was the first to break it, her voice firm. “What the hell, Buck?”
Chimney sighed, his disappointment evident. “You messed up, man. You don’t do that to someone like Y/N.”
Bobby, usually the voice of reason, stepped in, his tone stern. “You need to figure out how you’re going to make this right. But more importantly, you need to take responsibility for your actions, Buck. This wasn’t just a mistake. It’s a breach of trust. We don’t do things like that to each other.”
Buck looked around, his face pale as he realized just how badly he had screwed up. But it was Eddie who delivered the harshest blow. He stepped forward, his eyes blazing with barely concealed anger.
“You had something good, Buck,” Eddie said, his voice low but full of emotion. “And you threw it away. She deserved better than that. Better than you.”
Buck’s face fell, the weight of Eddie’s words hitting him like a punch to the gut. Eddie never spoke like that—especially not to his friends—but this was different. This was Y/N. And Eddie wasn’t just mad—he was furious.
As Buck stood there, looking like the ground had been ripped out from under him, Eddie turned on his heel and followed Y/N outside. He found her pacing near one of the firetrucks, her hands shaking as she tried to calm herself down.
“Y/N,” Eddie called out softly.
She paused, glancing up at him, her eyes red and glassy. “I’m fine,” she muttered, though it was clear she wasn’t. She won’t let any actual tears fall. Not here. Not at work. She can’t lose it.
Eddie sighs before taking a gentle step forward. He stops her pacing by grabbing her hands as delicately as possible. He can feel the furious energy buzzing through her skin. It’s a rage similar to his own. As he looks into her gorgeous (e/c) eyes, his anger morphs into pain. His heart aches at how broken she looks. She trusted Buck with every fiber of her being and he took it for granted. He took her for granted. How could he throw away such a beautiful soul?
“No, mariposa, you’re not,” he shakes his head. His deep chocolate gaze makes her shoulders slump. Her tense posture falls, knowing that there’s no point in lying to him. For whatever reason, Eddie has always been able to read her like an open book. She couldn’t keep secrets with him. He knew them before she even knew herself. “Everything that happened in there… that’s not fine. So please, don’t pretend with me.”
Y/N finally forced herself to open up. She exhales shakily, blowing a big puff of air out as she laughs brokenly. A small sniffle escapes her, “It just… hurts, y’know? I mean, I kinda picked up on something weird with them, but I thought I was just being paranoid,” she looks back down at her boot-clad feet. “I try not to be jealous, I feel like it makes me look crazy. But… I guess I should’ve trusted my gut.” She sends a halfhearted glare over at Buck who’s still standing in the middle of the fire station, trying to avoid everyone’s wrath. “I’m such an idiot.”
“Hey,” Eddie stops her, a serious look on his face. He moves one hand to cup her chin, forcing her to look back at him. “You are not the idiot in this situation. He is,” he nods in Buck’s direction. “He didn’t see the amazing woman he had right in front of him. He’s the biggest damn idiot in the world for losing you.”
Y/N feels like she can let her walls crumble around Eddie. There’s something about the way his strong presence grounds her, silently reassuring her that he’s there, that he’s supporting her. She relaxes into his soft touch, “I just… I don’t know what I’m gonna do now. I mean, he lives with me.”
Eddie hesitates for a moment before pulling her fully into him, wrapping his arms around her as she rests her head on his chest. “Well, the best answer I can give you is that you continue being you. And trust me, there’s someone out there who’s going to see how incredible you are and never take it for granted. Someone who would treat you like the gem you are.” He pauses before planting a soft kiss on her forehead, “And if you want, you can always stay with Chris and I until he gets all of his stuff cleared out.”
Y/N looks up at him, her eyes glistening with unshed tears. “I think I might take you up on that.” She swallows, trying to keep herself together. “But… what if I don’t want to go through all of that again? Maybe I’m not meant to find anyone else. What if I’m just…done with relationships?”
Eddie’s expression softened even further. He knew how hard this was for her, and part of him hated seeing her in so much pain, especially because of someone like Buck. But he also knew she was stronger than she gave herself credit for. “You’re not done, Y/N. You’re just hurt right now. But you’ll heal, and when you’re ready, you’ll move on. And when that happens, you’ll find someone who’s going to love you the way you deserve to be loved.”
Y/N searched his face for a moment, her breath catching in her throat. There was something in the way Eddie was looking at her—something she hadn’t noticed before. A tenderness, an intensity that made her heart skip a beat.
She blinked, trying to shake off the feeling. Now wasn’t the time. “Thanks, Eddie,” she whispered, her voice shaky but sincere.
He gave her a small smile, his hand lingering near hers for just a moment longer before he stepped back. “Anytime.”
They stood in silence for a few moments, the air between them charged with something unspoken. Eddie wanted to tell her that he was there for her in more ways than just friendship, but he knew this wasn’t the right moment. Y/N had just been through hell, and she needed space to heal.
But he also knew that if she ever needed him—really needed him—he’d be there without hesitation.
Before Y/N could respond, the station doors opened, and Hen walked out, giving them both a look. “Everything alright out here?”
Y/N straightened up, wiping her face quickly and nodding. “Yeah, I’m good.”
Hen gave her a knowing look but didn’t push. “Alright. We’re heading out for a call in a few minutes, so just wanted to make sure you were ready.”
Y/N took a deep breath, mentally preparing herself for the day ahead. “I’m ready,” she said, her voice more steady now.
Hen nodded and headed back inside, leaving Y/N and Eddie standing there in the quiet. Eddie looked at her one last time, his eyes filled with a silent promise. “You’ve got this.”
Y/N nodded, forcing a small smile. “Yeah. I’ve got this.”
As they walked back inside together, the weight of the day ahead still heavy on Y/N’s shoulders, she knew that it was going to take time to fully heal. But with Eddie by her side and the support of the rest of her team, she knew she wasn’t facing it alone.
And as for Buck? She wasn’t sure what the future held, but one thing was clear: she deserved better than what he had given her. And one day, she’d find it. But for now, she’d focus on what she did best—being a damn good firefighter and an even better person.
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Working a twelve hour shift on absolutely no sleep had to have been the worst decision Y/N could have made. It’s not that she isn’t capable of doing her job, it’s just her emotions were already on overdrive after seeing Buck, but now that exhaustion is kicking in, it’s not good for anyone.
She pulls the hair tie out of her hair as she grabs the remaining items from her locker. Her eyes travel over to Eddie who is already waiting by the entrance of the firehouse for her. He sends her a small smile and she returns it, a small flutter in her chest catching her off guard. Y/N internally scolds herself for staring too long. She’s always found Eddie attractive, but she just got out of a relationship with Buck. Now is not the time to be casting ogling glances to Eddie.
She slings her bag over her shoulder before heading out of the locker room. Thankfully, she has enough clothes in her bag for the next few days to bring to Eddie’s so she doesn’t have to go back home. She bids a proper goodbye to everyone, narrowly avoiding Buck who just walked out of the showers. He looks like a wounded puppy when he watches Y/N walk away.
He walks away dejectedly, trying to avoid the angry stares from the rest of the team. Y/N feels a certain level of safety as she continues growing closer to the Diaz man. To her dismay though, someone felt the need to disrupt her journey.
Taylor.
“Y/N, can I speak with you for a moment?” She asks, tilting her head in a way that makes Y/N clench her jaw.
“I don’t really think that’s a good idea,” Y/N replies smoothly.
Taylor persists, “I’m just asking for a second of your time.”
“To interview me professionally or to try and explain why you were butt ass naked on my couch?” Y/N raises a confrontational eyebrow, yet her tone remains collected. Taylor purses her lips, trying to fight off her own embarrassment as more people in the firehouse look over to them. Eddie takes a few steps closer, getting ready to intervene if needed.
“Look, you have every right to be angry–”
“Oh, I know,” Y/N nods, crossing her arms. “I don’t need your permission or you to tell me I have the right to do anything.”
Taylor sucks in a deep breath, clearly getting impatient. “I just think that maybe you’re being too hard on Buck. He really was in a rough place. I think you owe it to him to hear him out.”
“Really?” Y/N lets out a humorless laugh. “I owe him? Oh sweetheart, I don’t owe anyone anything,” she shakes her head, taking a step forward with a condescending smile. “He made his bed, or in this case, the couch, so now he can lay in it,” she shrugs nonchalantly. Y/N looks Taylor up and down before scoffing, “You two deserve each other…” she grumbles before shoulder checking the journalist and finishing her journey over to Eddie.
He watches her with an impressed look on his face, “How’d that feel?” He asks with a small grin.
“So good,” Y/N breathes out with a victorious sighs. “If I could’ve punched her without getting fired, I would have.”
Eddie chuckles, wrapping his arm around her shoulder as he walks her out of the firehouse. “You’re too professional for that.”
“Yeah… I suppose,” Y/N leans into his side.
“Hey, why don’t you ride home with me?” Eddie suggests. “Since you’re staying at my place, we could just carpool in the morning.”
“I can’t just leave my car here,” Y/N says logically.
“You can get it tomorrow,” he brushes off, guiding her over to his vehicle. “C’mon… it’ll be fun. I’ll let you play Hamilton on the way,” he grins, knowing that’ll get her to say yes.
Y/N sighs reluctantly but ultimately ends up hightailing it towards Eddie’s car. It makes her flush at the thought that he pays that much attention to her and the things she likes. She loves musicals and everything related to theatre. It’s a guilty pleasure she’s had since middle school.
The moment they walked into Eddie's house, Christopher came sprinting toward them, his excitement contagious.
“Y/N!” he called, throwing his arms around her waist. “Are you staying over?”
“For a little while,” Y/N said, ruffling his hair. “Think you can put up with me?”
Christopher grinned. “Only if we make cookies.”
Y/N looked at Eddie, raising a brow. “That okay with you, Chef Diaz?”
Eddie smirked, leaning casually against the doorframe. “I guess I can allow it. But don’t think you’re getting out of clean-up duty.”
Christopher grabbed Y/N’s hand, dragging her toward the kitchen. “C’mon! I already know where the chocolate chips are!”
Eddie followed, shaking his head with amusement as he grabbed an apron. “You’ve got him wrapped around your finger,” he teased.
“Oh, please. He’s the boss around here,” Y/N shot back, tying her own apron and bumping Eddie lightly with her hip.
As they worked, the kitchen buzzed with laughter and lighthearted banter. Y/N and Eddie stood shoulder-to-shoulder at the counter while Christopher focused on cracking eggs without shell casualties. Y/N nudged Eddie when she caught him sneaking a handful of chocolate chips.
“You’re supposed to bake with those,” she said, trying to snatch the bag away.
“You’re the one who ate half the dough at the station,” Eddie countered, leaning closer with a playful smirk. “Hypocrite much?”
“Someone had to test it for poison,” she shot back, their faces just inches apart. She realized too late how close they were, her breath catching at the warmth in his eyes.
Eddie cleared his throat, stepping back as he tossed the chips into the mixing bowl. “Poison control. Got it,” he said, his voice quieter now.
Christopher’s cheerful commentary broke the moment, and Y/N refocused, though her heart raced.
Later, as the cookies baked, the three of them sprawled on the couch with mugs of milk and plates of their handiwork. They watched Moana, singing along at Christopher’s insistence, and Y/N felt herself sink into the comfort of it all—a fleeting glimpse of a life she hadn’t realized she wanted.
By the time Christopher went to bed, yawning through his goodnight hug, Y/N felt exhaustion settle over her. Eddie walked back into the living room with a blanket slung over his shoulder.
“You take my bed,” he offered, his tone leaving no room for argument. “I’ll take the couch.”
“Eddie,” Y/N protested, “don’t be ridiculous. I can sleep out here.”
“I wasn’t asking,” he said with a crooked grin, tossing the blanket onto the couch.
She hesitated, looking up at him. “I mean… we could just share. Your bed’s big enough, right?”
Eddie froze for a beat, his brows lifting. “You’re serious?”
“Why wouldn’t I be?” Y/N shrugged, trying to sound casual, though her cheeks burned.
He exhaled and nodded. “Alright, but if you snore, I’m kicking you out.”
Later, lying side by side in the quiet of Eddie’s room, Y/N broke the silence. “I thought Buck was the one,” she admits quietly, her eyes falling as she thinks about everything that’s transpired in the past twenty-four hours. “And, y’know, maybe he was… for a while.” She turned her head, meeting Eddie’s steady gaze in the dim light. “But I’d be lying Eddie if I said I never thought about you,” her voices comes out in a whisper, almost like she’s scared of how he’ll react.
Eddie didn’t answer right away, his expression softening. Then, before she could second-guess herself, he leaned in, pressing his lips to hers. The kiss was slow, deliberate, and unguarded, carrying loads of unspoken feelings. When his hand slid to her waist and she deepened the kiss, Eddie pulled back suddenly, resting his forehead against hers.
“Y/N,” he murmured, his voice rough. “I can’t… I don’t want to take advantage of you. Not after everything with Buck.”
She nodded, her chest tightening with a mix of disappointment and admiration. “You’re a good man, Eddie.”
He smiled faintly. “I’m trying to be.” A small chuckle leaves his lips, “Believe me, it’s not easy. Not with you here, like this,” he gestures to the closeness between them. “I’ve thought about this more than I’d like to admit. Probably an embarrassing amount of times. And while I would love to continue what just happened, I can’t do that to you. Not when your heart just got broken.”
Y/N reaches over to cup his cheek, “Then maybe you can help me figure out how to fix it.”
══════ ∘◦❀◦∘ ══════
Over the next few weeks, their connection only grew stronger.
At the station, Eddie would appear beside her with coffee, their hands brushing in ways that felt intentional. Y/N’s laugh came more easily around him, and the team couldn’t help but notice. Hen caught Eddie sneaking glances more than once, and Chimney started placing bets with Bobby about when Eddie would make his move.
At Eddie’s house, Christopher treated Y/N like part of the family. She helped him with homework, played board games, and joined them for Sunday dinners. Eddie would lean against the doorway, watching them, his heart full.
Things finally felt good for Y/N. Like every single piece of her life fit perfectly. She was getting over Buck while still getting along well with the team. She’s been spending a lot of amazing time with Eddie and Chris. She absolutely loves the little boy. It’s like being apart of them and their routine was that little spark she was missing before.
One evening, after dropping Christopher off at a friend’s house, Eddie finally asked her out. “Y/N,” he began, his voice tinged with nervousness. “What would you say if I wanted to take you out for real? Like a date.”
Y/N smiled, her heart soaring. “I’d say it’s about time.”
Their first date was simple: dinner at a small Mexican restaurant Eddie loved, followed by a walk under the stars. They talked for hours, and when Eddie kissed her goodnight, it was everything she’d been waiting for.
Back at the station, their relationship became the team’s favorite topic. Hen teased them mercilessly, and even Chim couldn’t resist joining in. Buck, though initially uncomfortable, eventually came around, admitting that Eddie made Y/N happy in a way he hadn’t.
For the first time in a long time, Y/N felt like she was exactly where she was meant to be—with Eddie, with Christopher, with a future that finally felt whole.
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