#but please be kind to my body folx thank you much

[darlingfella]

I don’t normally post full body content on here. Please be kind 💙

(He/They)

[steviebbboi]

His Little Gem

Pairing: BandMember!Curtis x F!LeadSinger!Reader

Word Count: 3.6k~ highkey relieved that im able to write a shorter lengthed story this time lol

Summary: You and Curtis finally have a moment alone. Though, it turns out that Curtis actually loves the attention.

Disclaimer: This is my submission for @mercurial-chuckles writing challenge, "Smutty September Fest"~ Thank you lad for hosting this, and hoping that everyone enjoys this as much I loved writing it.

I also wrote this as a part of my eventual Bandmember!Curtis series from this poll. However, you can absolutely read this as a standalone.

***I don't give any permission for this to be reposted anywhere! Pls do not steal work, plagiarism isn't demureeee~~~~

Warnings/Triggers: 18+ Minors DNI; HIGHKEY its PWP but plot nonetheless, explicit sex/smut, p in v sex, oral sex (f! receiving), slight exhibitionism kink, praise kink, squirting, explicit language, slight/mild dumbification, slight/mild degradation kink, pussy slapping, dacryphilia kink, manhandling soft dom! curtis, slight overstimulation play, secret and established relationship btwn curtis and Reader. nickname for Reader is Sapphire/gem. if i missed anything, pls feel free to lmk~

Prompts Used: 2) sex in front of a big window where anyone could glance up and spot them; 5) body worshipping

A/N: ~I really appreciate ya'll for interacting with my fics! It's so cool to know that my writing resonates and is enjoyed by many. That said, it's common for fic writers to face huge ratio disparities with likes/reblogs. If you could kindly reblog my work as you enjoy it, that would be much appreciated! Reblogging gets our work out there for more folx to enjoy and genuinely encourages us to continue writing. It's a conflict on here for a reason -- know that this is said with much sincerity and kindness. Support writers please~

Tongues caressed each other in a greedy yet languid dance, your lips meeting Curtis’ so passionately as you both rode the high of finally having a moment alone together. 

“Mmph, God, I missed you, sapphire.” Curtis mumbled against your plush lips. His tongue eagerly lapped at yours as you whimpered in response.

Just registering his words, your laugh was muffled against his pressing mouth, “Miss me? Curt, we see each other everyday.” Another giggle attempted to escape but Curtis was skilled at keeping you distracted at this point.

His lips were still enthusiastically leaning in for more as small giggles escaped you, “I missed being with you. Your lips, your body pressed against mine. Especially, when I get to feel you like this.” He said emphatically as he dragged his calloused palms up your thighs and around till he was able to gain a desperate grip on your ass. 

You both moaned as Curtis groped you roughly, one of his hands leaving your ass only to land a loud slap against your pert cheek. You squealed playfully into his mouth while Curtis groaned deeply and did it again. 

Your short mini skirt was ruched around your hips as you rocked your center into the hardening tent in his jeans. Even through the fabric of your panties, which was dampening by the second, Curtis could feel the warmth of your wet pussy just seeping into the denimed layer covering his hard cock. 

Lips separating for a moment to allow the both of you to catch your breaths, Curtis looked at you darkly through his long eyelashes and grabbed your hips to slowly grind your pussy across his stiff member. 

Whining in response, your head tilted back in pleasure, giving Curtis the opportunity to leave lavish kisses all across the side of your neck. You felt your hips stutter as his wet lips sucked at that sensitive spot right underneath your ear. His tongue licked against your pulse, and your breathing started to get heavier as he continued sucking at your fragrant skin. 

“Curt–Curtis, the window…” You drawled out mindlessly as he continued laying kisses on your throat. His stubble made your skin red and blotchy and it stung so beautifully as his mouth balanced the pain with pleasure.

His back to the large window, you were straddling Curtis’ lap on the couch facing the city skyline in your penthouse condo. Only faint lights from other people’s apartments could be seen. If you focused hard enough, you could clearly see neighbors in buildings across from you eating dinner, or watching tv. 

As clearly as you could see them, you’re sure that you and Curtis could be visibly seen, even though the only thing that illuminated both of your silhouettes was the living room lamp casting a warm glow on your pressed and writhing bodies. 

“What about it, baby?” Curtis asks, just as mindless as you were at this point. His thoughts and senses were all enveloped around you.  

You could only gasp for air as one of his hands left your ass to grip onto and tug on your hair roughly, allowing such an erotic moan to leave your pillowy lips. His grip that remained on your ass only squeezed tighter when he heard your response. 

“God, -phire, you’re killing me. C’mere.” He used the hand at the base of your skull to push your swollen lips back onto his impatient ones. You whimpered into his mouth again as his soft tongue reunited with yours with a passion that felt so matched. Curtis was the only person that you have been with that has ever been able to make you feel this way. So unruly, excited, fiery, and intense. 

You both acknowledged the energy between you in your own ways since you have met.  Whether it was Curtis’ soft grasp around your waist navigating the paps outside the recording studio, or your hand gripping onto the inside of his elbow as you were in between stage sets. 

Safe and protected was how you ultimately felt when you were with Curtis. Combining that with being the best sex of your life, you felt invincible. He made you feel that way, and you liked being his Sapphire.

Even now as the rough texture of his hands, worn from years of playing, tugged on the sides of your lace panties down around your knees. He manhandled you onto your back as you giggled again, he ripped your panties from your legs completely. Curtis kneeled between your open legs, his shadowed eyes maintaining eye contact with your hooded ones. One hand gripped the outside of your ankle gently as he pressed his lips against your soft skin. 

You let out a soft gasp as his tender touch. He was slowly kissing up towards your center, his kisses getting wetter the closer that he got. A quiet whimper left your lips as Curtis left another wet kiss on your hip bone, and moved to kiss above your aching mound. The anticipation felt so strong - you released a bothered keen when Curtis didn’t land his lips on the correct destination, but instead, decided to lower down towards your other leg’s inner thigh and down towards the inside of your bent knee. 

“Curtis, please, kiss me.” You begged him with your eyes burning with frustrated tears.

Curtis laughed meanly as he responded, “I am kissing you, sapphire.”

You sobbed out a frustrated moan, “Ugh, you know what I mean – please! It’s been too long.” 

Curtis issued a low hum in agreement as he continued leaving soft kitten kisses on the inside of your knee, only moving slightly upwards towards your inner thigh and back down. His hands slowly caressed your legs in the places that his lips couldn’t touch. “Oh, I know, pretty girl. But that’s what makes this so fun for me.” 

A tear fell down the side of your face, as you sniffled your discontent at his pleasurable cruelty. Curtis knew your limits and knew that you would’ve said your safe word some time ago if you really wanted him to stop the slow approaches on your body. You both knew that Curtis teasing you was the build up that your body and mind needed. You needed to lose yourself a little bit in order to be fully present and attuned with the pleasurable sensations that Curtis will start and leave you with. 

Curtis cooed at you as he saw your distressed tears leave your eyes. “Aw, my little gem is frustrated, huh?” 

You nodded your assent with another sniffle as you looked into his bright eyes burning with a palpable affection and need for you. Seeing that glint in his eyes only made you cry a little harder and swallow down another sob, as you also missed Curtis when you were just like this. Him between your legs, gazing at you with such impassioned eyes that just landed so intensely. Your body burned so good, you couldn’t really handle it. 

“Okay, okay, sapphire. God, you’re so pretty when you cry, fuck.” Curtis moaned for you as he leaned up so that his face was over yours. His lips landed a wet and thorough kiss upon your deprived mouth. You continued to passionately make out for another minute as Curtis stripped you of your tee and lace bra. But he left the small mini skirt on all bunched up around the curve of your waist. His hands were free to roam the rest of your soft, aching body, spending time around your breasts to squeeze and pinch at your perky nipples. 

“I’ll give you what you need, my pretty baby, I got you.” He whispered against your open mouth as he drifted down to kiss at your neck briefly before enveloping his lips around your hard nipple. You inhaled air sharply at the feeling of his soft tongue swirling around the hardened nub while his other hand fondled at your other breast. The contrast of his warm, wet, soft tongue on one nipple and his gravelly touch on the other felt so euphoric. 

The need for him was just building bigger and bigger deep inside of you as he continued laving at your nipples. He alternated his kisses and touch on both of your breasts. You were also starkly aware of the fact that he was still fully clothed as the fabric of his jeans felt so good against your plush exposed skin. You moaned louder at the realization and your hips writhed up against his cloth covered chest. 

“Curtis, Curtis – fuck, I-I think I’m gonna–agh!” All of a sudden, the knot that was building deep in your stomach just unraveled as you came hard. Your pussy clenched around nothing as Curtis just made you cum from just playing with your tits. Curtis groaned deeply as he felt your wetness spread on his skin as your pussy dampened the layer of his shirt.  

He released his steady sucking of your nipples to look up at your pleasure-filled expression, your eyes dropped with soft satisfaction and sleepiness as you caught your breath. 

“Mmm, you’re such a good girl for me, little gem. Your body is so responsive - one of the things that I love about you.” Curtis praised as you released a chirp, his affirmations landed so well on your sated body.

“Wanna continue feeling good, baby?” He said as he finally lowered himself to land his lingering eyes upon your pulsing cunt. You nodded slowly while biting your lip, almost dumbly, as he used his thumb to cut the layer of stringy wetness that covered your pussy.

“Even your pussy cries for me, huh? So sweet,” he groaned while he licked up the first layer of your wetness. You moaned at the feeling of his moist tongue finally lapping at your weepy cunt. Your hips squirmed at the feeling but Curtis quickly used his strong arms to keep your hips down and legs wide open. 

He moaned at the taste of you and spent time firmly and slowly licking around the area of your clit. You released a high pitched moan when you felt his tongue maintaining steady pressure and swirling around your sensitive spot. You bit your lip to quiet down, feeling a bit embarrassed by your reactiveness.

It was like Curtis could sense your deliberate muffling and he released your swollen button only to land a sharp slap against your soaked pussy. You squealed at the sudden sensation and groaned deeply as his lips found your clit shortly after to weather the sudden pain. 

Your whimpers quieted down again but Curtis proceeded to smack your pussy again with a determined low groan. Before he landed another suck at your puffy clit, he said, “Don’t hide your pleasure from me, sapphire. Don’t ever do that with me, got it?” He landed another sharp slap with the flat of his hand and tapped at your clit in quick taps while you quite literally answered his demand with unfiltered and resonant moans. 

He sucked your clit back in his mouth and made quick laps and motions directly on it. Your eyes rolled back in your head and you gripped the back of his buzz cut head with need. The feeling of his tongue just sliding against you so swiftly and with wild abandon released your second orgasm of the night, in complete bliss as you abandoned any sense of being quiet. 

The both of you breathed heavily as you attempted to catch your breath once more. You looked down slowly at Curtis to see him still gazing at your drenched pussy. Your cum covered his mouth and beard in a light sheen, and his lips looked pink and swollen as he licked the remaining slick from them sensually. 

You whined again tiredly as you knew what that look meant. Curtis was obsessed with eating you out. It was like everytime that he tasted you, he couldn’t help himself from trying to get more and more from you. 

“Curtis, please, I need your cock inside of me.” Your timidness disappeared as you interrupted his thoughts on going back in for seconds. 

Curtis slapped your still twitching pussy again as you panted out responsive, high-pitched moans, so overstimulated that you could feel the knot in your tummy tighten again as you tried to writhe away from his calloused grip. 

“No, no, sweet girl, you’re not going anywhere, c’mere–  I haven’t had enough of this messy pussy yet, you’re still gushing for me.” Curtis groaned into your wet mound as he roughly manhandled you to sit up on your knees. 

You whimpered at his dirty words and at his rough touch as he bent you forward and adjusted you to lean your forearms on the tops of your couch, facing the window. But now, instead of just your face being visible to the night sky, your breasts hung seductively and your hair was mussed from your throes of pleasure. With Curtis kneeling behind you, it was obvious that you were not just star-gazing into the open city. 

“Wa-wait, Curtis, the people…” you said hesitantly while you turned your head slightly to look back at him.

Curtis found the hesitance in your eyes but also found that eagerness that you had at the thought of being seen. He knew what you really wanted, and he needed to give it to you. His eyes hardened into something dominating as he quickly leaned over your arched back to grip and tug at your hair again. You moaned as your head tilted back with his grip to alleviate the sharp pain. 

You felt Curtis’ warm breath at your ear as he whispered lowly, “They could never have you anyways, sapphire. You’re a good girl, aren’t you? Let them look.”

He released the grip on your hair as you mewled a greedy assent. He placed a demanding hand on the back of your neck so that you faced forward, eyes directly meeting other light-filled rooms with a gaze so turned on, you knew that you wouldn’t let him take you any other way. 

You gasped out for another gulp of air when you felt his tongue lapping at your cunt from behind. Your back arched in delight and your ass pushed back into his insatiable mouth. It didn’t take long for you to reach your inevitable end as Curtis was ruthless in his meal. 

You swallowed heavily as your mouth dried from how loud you were moaning. Your eyes widened as you cried out at the sensation of the tip of Curtis’ large cock catching at the inside of your sopping pussy. Hips pushing back against his cock to get him further inside of you, Curtis slapped your ass and whispered a mellowed, “patience, baby.”

Feeling your facial features twist into something needy, you gasped again– but not at the feeling of Curtis’ teasing cock, but at the sight of a person leaning against their apartment balcony that faced you. You weren’t close enough to make out any features other than a bodied silhouette, but you were suddenly so aware that if he tilted his head a bit upwards, he would also be able to make out yours and Curtis’ moving bodies. 

You felt Curtis dip his mushroom head inside of you further but not pushing all the way in. Your eyes rolled briefly again at the feeling of your walls aching to tense around the girth of his wide cock as you tried to gain enough sense to communicate. With gritted teeth, you moaned, “Fuck, there’s someone out there, Curtis.” There was a part of you conscious of someone looking up and finding you and Curtis just fucking, being splattered all over the front page of tabloids. 

Curtis gave his own pussy-drunk response with a mindless “huh?” and looked towards where your head was pointed. Laughing darkly, he just said, “Well, I guess you’ll just have to keep an eye out, baby. Or don’t–  either way, I’m still gonna fuck you till I get my fill, or until you eventually pass out from being all drunk on my cock.”

At the end of his possessive words, Curtis swiped his length at the wetness of your pussy before sliding in slow and deep. You keened loudly at the feel of him so deep inside of you, your walls accommodated him so snugly from how wet you were. 

Curtis dropped his head back in absolute bliss as he gripped onto your bunched skirt for a better grip. Looking down at your deprived body, the image of his hands using a pinched piece of fabric as leverage to thrust back against his penetrating cock made him moan wildly. 

“Fuck, you really are my gem, baby. Pussy was made for my cock, gripping me so tight, fuuuck.” He said as he thrusted in and out, still moaning out his pleasure at the feeling of you. 

You felt your skirt digging into the soft swell of your tummy as Curtis pulled you back onto his piercing cock. There were so many sensations running through you, both Curtis’ degrading words and the thought of just being fucked by him like a rag doll, like he was just using you turned you on so good. You could feel your body getting limper and your eyes were no longer trained on the person standing in their balcony. 

You quietly whimpered your contentment at getting fucked by Curtis, your mouth was agape as his thrusts were getting faster and harder. Leaning even lower onto the top of the couch, your body arched into an angle that allowed Curtis’ wide cock to hit you at a different angle that made you keen and gasp again. 

Curtis felt that patch of skin inside you that felt different from your inner walls and grunted in efforts of meeting it with every thrust. You gasped and moaned wildly at the feeling of him thrusting against your g-spot, and felt the sensation of another orgasm rushing in, “Yes! Yes! Please, I’m gonna cum, I’m gonna cum, Curtis, please!” you sobbed loudly while you rested your limp head on the couch near your aching arms.

Curtis seared the image of your soft and pliant body just letting him use you and growled out, “Cum for me, pretty baby. You’re taking my cock so well, my little gem. I knew you could– cum for me.” He thrusted harder at the anticipation of your sweet cunt tightening around him, the visuals and excitement of what was to come was enough for him to chase after his own release. The sensations of your wet cunt and feeling of your soft body under his well-practiced hands made him feral for you everytime.

Feeling so worshiped and desired, getting his permission to cum felt like a privilege as your head dropped further into a deep, fuzzy mental space. Your pussy squirted around his still thrusting cock as you sighed and moaned your intense pleasure.

Curtis only groaned deeply at finally feeling your velvet walls tighten against his shaft, and the sight of your squirt spilling and squelching out of you only made him feel the sensations even more. He released another guttural moan as he thrusted deeply inside of you, no longer being able to hold back his own release. 

You both moaned in satisfaction at the feeling of your combined spend being plugged inside of you as Curtis didn’t pull out. He leaned forward on your relaxed form to place soft, content kisses upon the curve of your spine. 

Stepping back to pull out of you, you gasped at the feeling of his cum spilling out of you slowly. Curtis let out a breathless laugh at the sight and groaned out his deep enjoyment of seeing you full of his spend. 

He slowly took off your now wrinkled skirt from your body and re-adjusted you so that the both of you could lay on the couch. Curtis’ large hands softly stroked and kneaded tension away from your lower back as you laid on top of him when you remembered the person on the balcony. 

You softly gasped and sat up abruptly to look down at where the person was standing. There was nobody there anymore, and you could only hope that they didn’t see. 

Looking back down at Curtis, you smacked his chest with a teasing and tired mirth, “‘Let them see’? Really, Curtis.”

Curtis released his own tired chuckle while his caresseses on your back moved to softly stroke at the soft sides of your tummy and waist. “It’s okay, sapphire. I kept an eye on them to make sure that they couldn’t actually see us.”

You hummed as your hands brushed at the hair on his muscular chest. “You know that we have to be careful. I’m not ready for the world to know that you’re mine yet.” 

At the quietness of your tone and downward shift of your eyes, Curtis could tell that you meant what you said sincerely. You both enjoyed the kinkiness of your sex life, but you also knew that there was a vulnerability in your relationship that you didn’t want exposed to the public. Or, to the rest of the band for that matter. 

Truthfully, he wasn’t ready to share you yet either. 

The thought of you being hounded by press and fans made his soft grip tighten on your hips a bit with a frown before he motioned for you to press down against him again with soft encouragement. 

Getting comfortable in his arms, you pressed your ear against his steady, thrumming heart and sighed in content. 

“I know, my little gem. I’ll keep you safe.” They were the last words that you heard as your tired eyes closed in blissful exhaustion in the shielding arms of the man that loved you.

A/N: Yay! What did we think? This goes w.o saying but pleaaase leave a comment or a reblog to kindly tell me your thoughts (genuinely, wanna know)! Hopefully, we will see more bandmember!Curtis x Sapphire in this future~

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[dyspunktional-leviathan]

Today's mobility aid update: apparently, I am now a Full Time Wizard Staff User.

_

Tl;dr: I'm a cane user who needs more support and has shoulder problems, I am beginning a cosplay of a dnd wizard, and turns out that apparently a staff is better for me than a cane.

(still planning to try forearm crutches and would like a powerchair eventually but well, I'll compare all those too. And for now, I have my staff.)

& also, the wizard I'm cosplaying, Raistlin Majere from Dragonlance, is canonically very disabled and uses his staff as a mobility aid.

_

Backstory: https://www.tumblr.com/dyspunktional-revan/717836384898023424, also some follow-up https://www.tumblr.com/dyspunktional-revan/719407235725492224 (I did try two canes and it was *horrible* on my shoulders).

And now I've been planning a cosplay of Raistlin Majere (who, by the way, canonically uses his staff as a mobility aid!! A young mobility aid user (25 in the first book (Dragonlance series), had to use a mobility aid since 21)! A disabled magic-user who is disabled not because he is magic-user (has been disabled all his life, an event that disabled him much more at 21 was related to magic but the disabilities themselves were not magical — his body was just severely weakened and broke down more; and *couldn't be healed* for magical reasons but not from magical afflictions)! And more and more and more I love Raistlin so much).

There had been several things at home that could go for the staff's pole but they all needed work and weren't very handy to walk with. But now I got a new one — a drape runner that wasn't holding in the wall and had to be taken off; and — this particular one was already an appropriate length. And empty inside, and thin and firm enough at the same time thanks to being metal (wrapped in some kind of plastic). I still had to give it some tip to stand on, and it wasn't even cut straight. It's 25mm and the standard cane tip is made for 20mm.

And then my mother had a genius idea. She took an old cane tip, and *shoved it in*. And it holds perfectly.

Now to the mobility aid part!

So, now I have a proto-staff I can actually walk with, and at first I felt like my cane was mostly better. But then I wanted to stand up and my legs hurt really bad, I took my cane at first but then I decided to take the staff instead — it can offer more support, especially if I hold it with both hands.

After a while, I put it down and took my cane — and realized that the staff was actually better. My shoulder instantly felt much worse. Idk about the rest because I just put down the cane and took up the staff again, and had been using it for the rest of the day.

I'll probably still need to use a more conventional mobility aid outside (when not in costume)... For one thing, I don't think anyone's going to offer a bus seat to a guy with a wizard staff rather than a cane or a crutch (eh. Also that applies to when in costume too, thought about that long before I'd thought of actually using the staff as a mobility aid outside of cosplay).

Although perhaps btw I could, like, try to ask, hey I have leg problems, I actually use a cane when not cosplaying, could you please,, Idk.

As I said in tl;dr, I'm still planning to try other mobility aids, planning to buy at least one forearm crutch as soon as I can go out (currently ill). I'll compare that and the staff too, might alternate like folx do alternate their conventional mobility aids? And eventually I would like a powerchair, don't know if it can ever become possible for me.

[ppersonna]

swipe right - jjk | m

“ i wanna ruin our friendship. we should be lovers instead. i don't know how to say this, cause you're really my dearest friend “ - jenny, studio killers

♡ summary-  after a horrible breakup, you sign back up for tinder and ironically match with your best friend, jungkook. a date for fun is harmless, right?

♡ genre- best friends to lovers, idiots to lovers, jk is a minecraft streamer, brother namjoon, brother-in-law jimin, namjoon is kind of a himbo stay at home dad ngl, ex-boyfriend seokjin (mentioned but doesnt show up)

♡ word count- 9k

♡ warnings- mentions of a bad breakup (smh seokjin wtf??), penetrative sex, unprotected sex (u know the business folx), oral sex (m receiving), teasing, SO MUCH BODY WORSHIP, jk is a simp, slight dirty talk, lots of just talking during sex yall it happens, creampie, cum play, praise praise body worship praise, did i mention body worship, tit-fucking, cum eating, i think thats all.

♡ a/n - helloooo and thank you for your wait for this fic! i’m so happy its done and i loved writing it! it’s a little bit different feel for my usual style of writing (smut-wise) so please tell me your thoughts! i didn’t use dom/sub themes OR a daddy kink LMAOOOO praise me please. i hope you enjoy!! pls feel free to comment, chat, message, carrier pigeon, email, mail, WHATEVER U WANT, me. i love u babies. thank you to @kimtaehyunq​ for the sexy banner. and for @xjoonchildx @ladyartemesia​ @untaemedqueen​ for the writing support and idea generation. i would be nothing without my council. and thank you to my beta editors @hobi-gif and @ughseoks​ and @hongism​ for the perusal and help in writing this!

Jungkook is the person you call when your world falls apart.

He answers, voice raspy from the late hour, and the second he asks you what’s wrong, the downpour of torrential tears you’ve been holding back finally escapes and you’re sobbing through the phone that you just lost the love of your life—that he left and with little effort on his part, and a lot on yours.

Jungkook listens to you—his heart aching deep in his chest at hearing the utter heartbreak that’s clear in your voice. You’ve never been hurt like this, and he’s desperate to hold you, to make it go away. He wants to drive over to Seokjin’s house and throw a left hook into his stupid, handsome face for making you feel you weren’t worth it.

Because if there’s anything in the world that Jungkook knows, it’s that you’re worth it. You’re worth everything. Add up all the money and all the gold in the entire world, and it still doesn’t meet a fraction of what you’re worth to him.

“Where are you?” He asks as he cradles the phone against one arm and pulls on his jeans.  

You sniffle. “Jungkook, it’s 3 am.”

“So? I was up playing Minecraft,” He lies. “Where are you?”

You can’t help but laugh the tiniest bit, a sliver of warmth wrapping itself around your raw and exposed heart. Like a balm to a flesh wound. It doesn’t heal it, not yet.

“I’m at our park.”

Jungkook smiles as he grips the phone back in his hand. The park. The place you and Jungkook spent your childhood playing make-believe games, and formative teenage years loitering around smoking clove cigarettes to look cool.

“Give me five minutes, okay?”

You nod, even though he can’t see you. 

“Okay.”

Jungkook arrives with two minutes to spare. His beat up Nissan that he insists is “vintage” and “priceless” idles next to you.

He can see you through the darkened glass of your car—your mascara is running down your face, tears streaked through your flawlessly applied makeup.

You still look so beautiful.

And it angers Jungkook that all that time you spent looking good for Seokjin meant nothing to him.

He motions for you to come over, pats the passenger seat next to him and smiles as he watches you open the door and slide into the security of his familiar car.

“You cleaned your car,” you murmur as you notice a severe lack of McDonald’s trash.

He sniffs haughtily. 

“The trash added character.”

Jungkook doesn’t give you a chance to respond. Instead, he’s unbuckling his seatbelt and pulling you as close to him as he can get you. The instant his arms wrap around your body, the floodgates open again and your once-quieted tears turn back into full-fledged sobs.

“I loved him,” you gasp through the pain in your throat.

He rubs your back, pats your hair gently, soothing you the way he has for years now. Through every breakup, through every family fight with your older brother Namjoon, through all the mean girls in high school. Jungkook is the north star—always consistent, always guiding you back to safety.

“I know, babe,” he sighs. “You deserve someone who’s going to treat you right, who’s not just going to give up when things get hard.”

You choke back a cry against his Patagonia hoodie and bury your face further into the crook of his neck. He smells like Old Spice and the shampoo he uses, along with the smell of laundry soap you buy for him—he uses dish soap when he runs out and nearly broke his washing machine last time.

“I thought he was the one. I’m so stupid.”

Jungkook swallows hard. Tonight is about comforting you, not about feeling sorry for himself that you’re his best friend and not his girlfriend. He can’t help but think of what kind of life he would give you. He knows it’s one that wouldn’t end with you crying in a parking lot at 3 AM.

“You’re not stupid, you just loved him. And there’s nothing stupid about loving someone, even if it doesn’t work out,” he sighs as he cradles your head against him. It feels right having you there, pressed up against him and seeking comfort from the solace of his arms.

“Let’s go get a milkshake, yeah?” He asks as you pull your head up and look at him with sad, glassy eyes.

“Yeah,” you nod after a moment of staring.

Jungkook’s eyes sparkle with love, with hope. It makes the desperate, alone feeling inside you—disappear. Jungkook presses a soft kiss to your forehead and then starts the shaky ignition of his car, that takes three cranks of the key before it turns over.

He sends you a look, a laugh evident on your face.

“Don’t even start,” he warns. “The engine is fine.”

“Whatever you say,” you snort as you wipe an errant tear from your face.  

“It’s a certified classic car! I could get millions for this baby!”

As the weeks pass, the pain of losing Seokjin becomes further and further from your mind. You can get through the day without crying anytime you see something that reminds you of him and even start flirting with others without feeling like you’re cheating.

You just still haven’t reached the point where dating someone else even feels possible. You’re terrified of allowing someone close to you, letting them into a place where you’re inviting them to possibly hurt you. You’re not sure your heart is ready for it. 

“I think you’re just scared,” your older brother Namjoon states as he warms up a bottle of milk in boiling water. 

He cradles his new baby in one arm while the other works at the bottle of milk. 

“I’m not scared,” you huff. “I just don’t think it’s the right time.” 

Namjoon sighs and hands the gurgling newborn baby off to you and readies the bottle for you to feed your new niece, Jisoo. 

“Look, Seokjin sucks, okay? I know you two were together for some time, but in the end, he wasn’t the right one for you. There’s someone out there who is the right one for you. You know how many shit frogs I had to kiss before I got my prince?” 

You make a face as you feed Jisoo, who happily sucks and gazes at the lights above. 

“You call Jimin a prince?” 

Namjoon sighs dreamily as he watches the baby and thinks of his husband. 

“The dreamiest prince,” he breathes, eyes closed in bliss. “But back to your problems. I think you should get back out there. Go on some dates, meet some people. No one is telling you to fall in love and get married tomorrow. Just go have some fun.” 

You allow Namjoon’s words to mull through your mind. What could be the harm in joining a few dating sites, perhaps spending some time at the gym or grocery store flirting with someone cute?

“Fine,” you say. “I’ll think about it.” 

“Good. I can’t be the only one giving our parents grand-babies. Soo needs a cousin.” 

You smile down at the tiny bundle in your arms and imagine a future where you have a baby of your own. 

“Okay, I’m not trying to get knocked up, Joon.” 

“Whatever,” he sighs. “Help me choose a wall color for me and Jimin’s new master bathroom.” 

Tinder’s changed since the last time you used it, years ago. It’s gone from any semblance of dating to strictly an app used to get laid. 

It’s discouraging swiping through all the obvious fuckboys. Sure, a quick and easy lay sounds great, but you’re also trying to go out and enjoy real, traditional dates, and it seems none of these guys want to step foot outside of a bedroom. 

The swiping left becomes almost monotonous. You’re sitting on your couch, watching some documentary about serial killers, when a startling profile pops up on your Tinder feed. 

The picture that pops up is... Jungkook. You can’t stop the bubble of laughter that leaps from your chest. His profile is so authentically Jungkook that you’re swiping right before you even know it. 

Your brain doesn’t even comprehend what a match with Jungkook means, really. You’re still laughing as you click on the bubble to message him and send him as many laugh emojis as you can. 

“Hey guys, what’s up, Kookie here with another Let’s Play Minecraft video for ya. Be sure to like and subscribe if you enjoy this kind of content.”

Jungkook’s headset is firmly wrapped around his head, mic next to his mouth and hands at the ready on his mouse and keyboard. He’s set and in the zone. 

The game is well into play when the familiar chime of his phone goes off. It’s a Tinder notification—he can tell by the sound. He can’t help but roll his eyes, wondering what sort of boring conversation he’s meant to have with a girl who will probably ghost him, anyway. 

He lazily lifts his phone and glances at the notification, before dropping it back to the desk. 

His hand freezes on his mouse as he finally comprehends what he just read. 

He just matched with YOU. 

His best friend. 

His secret, lifelong crush. 

He sputters something into the microphone and stops recording his game, wildly grasping for the phone and unlocking it. 

YN: 😂😂😂😂 is your bio a Minecraft pickup line?!

He pauses, attempts to collect his thoughts, before desperately typing on his screen. 

JUNGKOOK: Why? 😉😏 did it work?

You spend the rest of your night jokingly flirting with Jungkook, sending GIFs and emojis in between the silly lines you’re using on each other. 

Right before you’re about to head to sleep, Jungkook sends one last message. 

JUNGKOOK: What if we went on a date lolol. Haha jk. Unless?? 👀👀👀

Your thumbs hover over the keys to your phone. 

A date with Jungkook? Even though you matched with him, you’ve never thought of a date with your childhood best friend. 

YN: alright, it’s only fair since we matched 😝 show me how you treat these tinder ladies

“I have a date with Jungkook tonight,” you tell your brother, Namjoon, over the phone. 

Over the crying of your newborn niece, you hear Namjoon splutter in confusion. 

“You what!?” He nearly screams. “Jeon Jungkook? Like... the annoying kid you’ve been friends with since fourth grade?”

You huff. 

“He’s not annoying! He’s my best friend. We ironically matched on Tinder and… Well, why the fuck not? Nothing serious is going to happen. We’ll go out and have a story to tell about how incompatible we are.”

Namjoon doesn’t reply. Instead, you hear him speak to his husband. 

“She’s going on a date with Jungkook,” he says over the muffle of his hand on the receiver.

There’s a shuffle, and the dulcet voice of your brother-in-law, Jimin, comes over the line. 

“Girl,” he starts. “What the fuck?”

You chuckle as you move about your closet, trying to decide what’s appropriate to wear on a date with your best friend. 

“It’s nothing!” 

“Mm-hmm,” Jimin tuts. “You know the boy is in love with you.” 

“Okay, Chim, you’ve been spending too much time cooped up with my brother. It’s affecting your grip on reality.”

“Sure, honey. I just tell it like it is. Don’t break his heart.” 

You roll your eyes. 

“I won’t break his heart because there’s nothing there, Jimin.”

“I’ll be expecting your call later.”

“Yes, dad. Love you guys.”

“We love you too, sweetheart. But really, don’t break that poor boy’s heart.”

You open your mouth to retort yet another reassurance that there’s nothing to break, but the line goes dead.

“Fucking Jimin,” you mutter as you throw your phone to the bed.

You can’t allow yourself to think that Jungkook might have feelings for you. It’s totally out of the questions. He’s your best friend. The guy who shoves Cheetos up his nose to make you laugh and falls asleep during every movie night with his face in the popcorn bowl. He’s just Jungkook. This date is just a funny way to hang out.

So, why do you care so much about what you wear?

You’re still standing in front of your closet, attempting to find something respectable to wear. It doesn’t matter that the last time Jungkook saw you; it was with mascara streaming down your face and a hoodie from Namjoon’s college swimming days and ripped leggings. Jungkook has seen you in nearly everything you wear, so your indecisiveness gives you pause.

Do you want Jungkook to be attracted to you? Do you want to do your best to look as presentable as you would for a normal date?

The thudding of your heart tells you that maybe you’re more interested in this being a date than you’re allowing yourself to believe.

You shake all thoughts off. 

No, you won’t allow yourself to overthink a night that should just be fun.

You settle for a fitted and simple summer dress, tights and heels. Simple, easy, respectable but also showing enough cleavage and sculpt of your ass to ensure you look more dressed up than not.

Perfect.

With one last look in the mirror, you’re ready.

JUNGKOOK: I’m outside!

ME: See you soon!

Jungkook taps his foot anxiously as he sits on the bench outside your apartment. His tight black jeans feel like a second skin on his legs, and the black button-down shirt he’s tucked in makes him rethink his choice of outfit.

Is he too casual?

He’s never really worn something like this around you. This is what Jungkook wears when he wants to seduce. This is what every girl he’s desperately wished was you got to see. The girls who swooned over his messy hair, the way his jeans display his toned thighs, the peek of skin at his throat.

Maybe it’s too much.

Maybe he’s afraid he’ll scare you away.

Maybe he’s afraid you won’t like it.

He’s given no chance to ruminate anymore because you’re exiting the building and walking straight towards him.

He doesn’t think he remembers how to breathe.

It’s as if you walk towards him in slow motion. Angels chorus around him and the setting sun sparkles on your face like a spotlight. There’s nothing in the world anymore, nothing but you.

You’re the most beautiful human he’s ever seen in his life.

“Hi,” you smile as you approach him.

He continues to stare, eyes traveling over the soft curves of your cheeks and jaw, trailing down to the way your dress clings just right to each dip of your body. His throat goes dry.

You are without a doubt the girl of his dreams. 

“Jungkook?”

It pushes him out of his reverie, eyes widening as he realizes he’s been staring at you for maybe a few minutes too long to play off as normal.

“Hey!” He coughs, attempting to right himself.

“You okay?” You ask, eyebrow lifted in concern.

“Yeah! Yup! Totally! I’m okay—a-okay, absolutely great.” He internally slaps himself.

“You clean up nice,” you smile as your eyes elevate up and down the lean form of his body.

“Oh?” He asks, taken aback. 

In his daze, he never even realized what you’re thinking about him, rather only how intensely he was thinking about you.

“This must be the Jungkook that all the girls in college couldn’t stop begging me to hook them up with.”

His cheeks flame with sudden embarrassment, hand moving to the back of his neck to rub it awkwardly. 

“Ha, yeah,” he swallows. “You look r-really nice too. I don’t think I’ve seen you in a dress since your brother’s wedding.”

The smile that he’s rewarded with nearly knocks him on his ass. “Thanks! It’s fun to dress up cute again. Jin hated this dress.”

A stab of pain eeks its way into Jungkook’s heart. Seokjin. God, how he hates that man.

“Well, uh, you can wear whatever you want with me!” He assures. 

You loop your arm around Jungkook’s, saddling up to his side as you look at him expectantly.

“Well, are we going?”

Jungkook can’t help but smile at the sparkle in your eye, the way you peer up at him with those soft, cherry lips. He wants to capture them with his own, kiss you until you don’t remember Seokjin’s name ever again.

But he resists.

“Let’s go!”

You never thought you’d admit it to yourself. You never even thought it could happen. 

But the date is everything you’ve ever wanted, and more. 

Jungkook is still Jungkook, still just as silly and easy to talk to as he always is. 

But he’s also charming. Flirtatious, even. He holds doors open for you; he rests his hand on the small of your back as he guides you towards your table at dinner. He feeds you bites of his dessert and lets his eyes linger on the way your lips look wrapped around his fork. 

Jungkook treats you the way you’ve always wanted to be treated. Like someone he wants to cherish for the rest of your combined lives. Someone he wants to take care of, build a future with, enjoy life with.

And as much as it thrills you, it absolutely frightens you. 

It’s when you’re walking down the small river trail together that Jungkook slips his hand into yours and laces your fingers together. The once-steady beat of your heart becomes erratic. He continues chatting—as if holding your hand was a subconscious act for him. He’s knee deep in a story of his Minecraft server when you stop walking, causing him to pause. 

“What’s up?” He asks curiously. 

Your eyes glitter with anticipation, with fear, as you stare at the gorgeous man before you. He looks like a full course meal in his tight jeans and he makes you feel like a princess. You can suddenly see doing life by his side—no longer his platonic best friend, but as his lover and lifelong partner. 

You say nothing. Instead, you simply close the space between you two by grabbing the buttons of his shirt and tugging his lips onto yours. 

“Wha—oh, mmmmmm.”

Jungkook is still for a second as he battles the surprise, but jumps into action and cups your face with his hands, deepening the kiss by pushing his tongue past your lips and swirling it around your own. 

Your bodies press close together. He can feel your breasts against his chest and he desperately wants to rip the dress off your body and worship you like he’s always wanted to. 

As soon as the kiss started, it’s over. You’re pulling away with eyes wide with fear.

“I’m sorry, I—I need to go,” you stammer awkwardly.

Jungkook’s heart drops to his stomach.

“What? We were going to get ice cream?”

You can feel tears building in the corners of your eyes. You’re so confused, so unsure of what you’re feeling. You want to stay and kiss Jungkook until you’re clawing at the clothing on his body, pressing kisses to the firm column of his neck. You want to run far away, too scared to admit it to him you’re sure you could love him for the rest of his life.

You can’t lose that friendship. You can’t risk everything you love about Jungkook. He’ll only hurt you the way every boyfriend ever has.

“I don’t really feel well,” you swallow hard as you lie. Jungkook always knows when you’re lying.

His body stiffens.

“Okay, let me walk you home.”

You shake your head, already moving away from the man.

“It’s fine. We’re nearby. I’ll just run or something.”

He opens his mouth to protest, but you’ve already turned face and started running the direction away from him.

Jungkook watches, misty-eyed, as the girl of his dreams runs further and further away from him.

You’re sobbing as you finally reach home, out of breath and confused. The phone call to Namjoon is quick.

“Yo,” he says cooly as he answers the phone. His tone changes when he hears your whimpering sobs on the other end.

“Joonie,” you whisper. “I fucked up.”

“Oh god,” Namjoon quickly shuffles and calls his husband over, before putting the phone on speaker.

“What’s happened, baby?” Jimin’s sweet voice asks.

“I—I kissed him,” you sob, holding yourself close in the comfort of the elevator. 

Namjoon and Jimin look at each other with knowing looks.

“We’re on our way over.”

Jimin knows the first order of business is to stop the crying. He places sleeping baby Jisoo in your arms, which quiets your whimpers enough as you cling to the tiny baby. He knows your weakness is sleeping babies.

Namjoon looks on anxiously, hates seeing his little sister upset and with no way to make it better.

Jimin’s been asked to take the lead on this, because he knows his husband's response is to cry as well—he gets emotional anytime he sees her cry. Namjoon agreed, knowing Jimin was better suited for the conversation.

“Tell us what happened,” Jimin asks quietly. You’re rocking the baby gently, sobs turned to sniffles. “Did something go wrong on the date?”

Your eyes peer up at your brother-in-law’s, a wounded look that makes Jimin feel sad. Namjoon clenches beside him, and Jimin lays a hand on his lap to soothe the protective brother.

“No,” you whisper. “That’s the thing. It was an amazing date.”

Jimin watches you curiously, but remains silent to let you continue.

“We had dinner, and we played arcade games and we walked around. And he was so… fuck, he was perfect. It was like dating the guy of my dreams.”

Jimin nods knowingly.

“And it surprised you how much you liked him.”

“Yeah,” you sniffle. “At the end, he was holding my hand and just talking about normal, stupid Jungkook shit, but this time it felt like more. Like, I felt in my heart that I wanted to be the one he always talked to about it. I wanted to be the one he came home to at night.”

Jimin pats your cheek lovingly, the care for his sister-in-law clear in his gaze. 

“You don’t just like him, honey. I think you might even love him.”  

You pull baby Jisoo tighter into your grasp and nod, pathetic tears slipping down your face. 

“I just left him. Like, I ran away from him like an asshole.”

Namjoon grunts and takes a spot next to Jimin. “If he loves you, which I’m sure he does, he’ll still be waiting for you.”

Jimin nods and rests a hand on his husband's back. “But you better have one hell of an apology.”

Jungkook doesn’t answer your phone calls. He doesn’t respond to your texts, snapchats or Instagram DM’s. He doesn’t even look at the TikToks you sent him! It’s becoming infuriating to get in touch with him.

You take matters into your own hands and storm to his apartment after work, the rising tension in your shoulders and stomach full of rocks an indicator of your anxiety about the future of this relationship.

Jungkook opens the door wearing nothing but a pair of grey sweats. All the carefully crafted words exit your mind at light 

speed and you’re left gasping, wide-eyed at the chiseled body of your best friend.

“Can I help you?” He asks, tone flat.

Ouch.

You push past him into the apartment you know so well. “Yeah, you could start by answering your phone.”

Jungkook rolls his eyes and closes the door, then heads back towards the large gaming setup in the living room.

“My apologies for not responding to the girl who literally ran away from me on a date.”

Your cheeks heat uncomfortably as you stand in the center of his living room, arms crossed over your chest. 

“Jungkook, listen. I’m—”

“Please,” he shakes his head as he sits down at the impressive gaming chair. “Save the apologies. I get it.”

“You don’t get it!” You say, exasperated. “You don’t get any of it! That’s why I’m here.”

Jungkook narrows a look at you then stands from his chair. Slowly, he makes his way towards you and stands inches from your face. The proximity of his bare, toned chest to your body makes your throat dry.

“No, you don’t get it.” His voice is threateningly quiet, completely different from his usual chipper tone. 

“Jungkook, I’m sorry.”

“Sorry for what?” He quirks his head sarcastically, and you’re struck by the sharp lines of his jaw. “Sorry for running away from the date? Sorry for going on a date? Sorry for making me feel like I had a fucking chance when you kissed me?”

You swallow hard and open your mouth to reply, but he cuts you off.

“I’m sorry too. For giving myself way too much hope that this could ever be something. I’m sorry for myself for thinking you’d at least respect me enough to reject me politely.”

“You always had a chance!” You can feel tears building in your eyes and Jungkook feels his heart pound in his chest like a drum.

He scoffs, a harsh and mirthless laugh. “Clearly not.”

“I just—,” you start. “I never saw you like that before and suddenly you became everything I’ve ever dreamed of. It was like getting hit by a train, Kook! Suddenly my best friend turned into the man of my dreams.”

He shakes his head, stepping back away from you.

“I really find it hard to believe you,” he whispers. “I can’t let myself hope.”

“Jungkook, please,” you beg as tears start slipping down your face. “Please believe me.”

“Just leave,” he sighs. “I hate making you cry.”

You want so badly to wrap yourself in his arms, cry into his chest like you always do when you’re hurt. But you stand still, frozen in your shame and embarrassment of hurting your best friend so badly.

“I’m sorry,” you murmur, before you spin around as quickly as you can and leave Jungkook’s apartment in a flurry.

He watches as the door slams behind you, eyes full of sadness and regret. As much as he wants to believe you, have faith in every word you said, he can’t allow himself to get his hopes up again.

He can’t watch you run away from him again.

“Welcome back to Kookie’s Wild Weekly Walkthrough!” Jungkook cheers as enthusiastically as he can through his microphone. “The weekly segment where I react to your Minecraft worlds!”

Jungkook needed to dive back into streaming to take his mind off of you. He hasn’t left his apartment in days, only subsisting on takeout and coffee. At least he was making more money and his subscribers didn’t seem to mind the up-tick in content.

“Tonight I’ll be walking through a creation sent by,” he squints at the username. “‘Kookiesgal95’ Aww that’s cute.”  

He readies the content and starts his camera as he watches the YouTube link. His subscribers love his reaction videos—it’s a highly requested segment.

The video starts off easily, a generic Minecraft world that looks like a park.

“Hi Kook.”

The voice that reverberates through his headphones makes him pause the video quickly, wide-eyed with recognition.

It’s you. He’d know that voice from a million others. 

Shit. He’s going to have to edit so much of this clip. He’s staring at the screen as if he’s just seen a ghost.

Unsteadily, he clicks play again and watches as you lead him through your Minecraft creation.

“I wanted to recreate something for someone very special in my life.”

Jungkook doesn’t even bother to react to this anymore. This entire video is going to be worthless—there’s nothing he can say.

The video pans around the Minecraft setup and he can see what looks like handmade swings and merry go rounds.

“It took me a really long time to do this and an embarrassing amount of help from some twelve-year-olds on the internet.”

He laughs and is stunned by the wet tears rolling down his cheeks. He hadn’t realized he was crying.

“I re-created a park that is really special to my best friend and I.”

He feels his chest tighten and relax. The park. 

“This is the spot where he held me when my dog died when I was nine. I still miss that dog.”

The view is on a spot next to a blocky oak tree. Jungkook remembers that day, remembers your heartbroken sobs as he whispered words of comfort to you. He misses that dog, too. 

“This is where he and my brother got in a fight when we were eleven, because my brother called me a stupid-head. My best friend has always been protective of me, even from my own big brother.”

He can still remember pushing Namjoon around after hearing him call you names. He pushed Namjoon over and threatened to use his “big muscles” if he did it again.

The camera pans to an enormous structure, rather sloppily made, of a slide and monkey bars.

“This is where we first shared a joint in high school. I coughed a lung up and he ran down the street to a gas station at ten pm to get me a bottle of water even though I told him I was okay,”

The memory of the bewildered 7-11 employee plays through his mind. The man watched as a very stoned, very out of breath, Jungkook paid for a bottle of water in coins.

The video continues playing, moves towards what appears to be a parking lot made of cobblestone blocks.

“This is where he held me when my world fell apart.”

The break-up. The way you cried and cried and cried in his arms and he held you as if you were the only thing left on Earth. 

“This is where he reminded me I’m worthy of love, that I’m not broken. This is where he held me like I was delicate, but treated me like I was unbreakable.”

His tears don’t stop. Jungkook feels his heart thundering in his chest like a summer storm. 

He can hear your sniffles through the recording of the video—you were crying too. It pans around to the swing set.

“And this is where I’ll tell him everything, tonight. Where I’ll tell him how deeply I love him and how I want to make him the happiest guy in the world. In all of Minecraft and beyond. I hope he comes.”

Jungkook doesn’t even bother turning his camera off.

Instead, he’s running to change out of his three-day-old clothes and bolt out the door.

The creaky, rusty metal of the swing set is deafeningly loud in the silence of your park.

It’s dark, just a few street lights around to illuminate the perimeter, but it’s otherwise only lit by the moon.

It’s getting cold. You shiver in your hoodie and kick at the dirt under your swing. 

Maybe he didn’t see the video. Maybe he wasn’t going to show.

Maybe it was too late.

You spent hours working on the Minecraft world, staying up at all hours of the night to build and craft a poor re-creation of this park. The twelve-year-olds on Reddit had been invaluable and Namjoon definitely made fun of you for your creative assistants. But it had all been worth it. 

“Fuck,” you speak out loud to no one, as you try to warm your hands in the pockets of your sweater. “It’s cold.”

“You should have brought a jacket.”

The sudden voice from behind startles you. You hop off the swing and whip around to face  down the intruder.

Jungkook.

He looks so good. He’s wearing a thick coat and tight jeans. Your eyes take a delicious journey from head to toe.

He can’t help but preen at your blatant appreciation. He enjoys knowing you’re attracted to him, at least physically.

“You came.”

He nods and takes a nervous step towards you. He’s still far away, more than an arm's-reach away. You’re desperate to bring him closer, to pull him tight against your body and wrap yourself around him. You never want to be without his gentle touch again.

“I felt pretty compelled to come after you made all this in Minecraft for me.” He cracks a wry smile, a boy-ish grin that makes your heart flutter.

“It took me twenty-five hours and some teenagers to help.”

He laughs, a beautiful sound that warms you. “I’m sure they were ecstatic to help.”

You chew at the inside of your cheek, nervous at what he thinks about your in-game confession.

“Did you mean it?” He asks. He steps closer—one more step.

“Every word.”

His eyes are searching yours for the truth, desperately diving into the depths for validity.

“Why did you run away?” Another step.

You swallow hard, heavy tears brimming in your eyes.

“You went from being the silly best friend to being the person I could spend the rest of my life with. It all hit me. It’s always been you.”

One more step and now he’s just within your reach. If you stuck your hand out, your fingers would graze the soft puff of his coat, the delicate skin of his neck. 

“I’ve always felt that way about you. I never thought you’d feel the same.”

You smile softly, timidly. “It just took me a little while longer to realize it.”

All at once, Jungkook closes the gap and holds you gently by your cheeks. His thumbs wipe at the moisture under your eyes. 

“I promise to never make you cry again,” he whispers reverently. 

“And I promise to never run away from you again.” 

Jungkook smiles at that, cradling your face like you’re the most expensive and precious jewel. 

“Can I kiss you again?” He asks, somewhat unsure of himself. 

“I would like it if you would.”

As Jungkook presses his cold, plush lips to your own, you make a promise to yourself to never go a day without kissing him again. 

“I can’t believe you’re in my bedroom,” Jungkook murmurs as he kisses at your face. After the park, Jungkook loaded you into his priceless Nissan and scurried home. You could hardly keep your hands off him as he drove you back to his place—reaching and caressing the spots on his body you’re dying to become familiar with. 

“I’ve been in your bedroom before,” you remind him as he tugs up the hoodie you’re wearing. 

“God, don’t be so semantic when I’m trying to fuck you,” he says before throwing the hoodie to a corner of the room. “You know what I mean.”

Jungkook kisses you again, all lips and teeth and tongue. He kisses you like you’re the last breath of air, and he’s greedy for every bit. He grips your hips, not too tight, and brings your body against his. You can feel him grow in hardness in his too tight, and it feels like bliss. 

Teasingly, you grind your hips against his, making him shudder with desire.

“I want you,” he whines as he nibbles at your lip. 

“Really? I couldn’t tell.”

He opens his eyes to level a look at you, pulling his mouth away from yours. 

“You’re such a little smartass.”

His hands become feverish on your jeans, tugging apart the button and flicking down the fly. He pushes them down quickly, and you kick them off carelessly. 

He can’t stop looking at you in your bra and panties, standing at the foot of his bed. 

“Holy shit, okay, this is happening, right? Like, this is real?” 

You smirk, pleased with Jungkook’s obvious excitement. 

“Let me prove it’s not just a dream.” 

Softly, you spin Jungkook around and push him down to sit on his bed. He complies easily, eyes wide and excited. 

“If this is a dream, would you be able to feel this?” You ask as you unbuckle  his belt and open his jeans. He doesn’t reply, simply watches you as you tug his jeans down to his thighs. 

His cock strains hard against his tight boxers, and you run a teasing finger over the obvious bulge. 

“Oh fuck,” he breathes. 

“Feels pretty real, huh?”

“Y-yeah.” 

Your delicate hands gently tug at the waistband of his boxers and easily work them down enough to free the length of his cock. It springs out easily and your eyes widen at the impressive size. You assumed he would be at least average, but you’re looking at something definitely more. 

“Oh wow,” you whisper. “You’re fucking huge.” 

Jungkook grins. “All for you, baby.” The cockiness is palpable. 

One solid grip around him wipes the presumptuous smile off his face, replaced with a gasping, shuddering moan. 

“How about this? Not a dream?”

He struggles to find his voice, instead he’s gulping for air like a fish out of water. 

“That’s what I thought,” you whisper before settling into a position on your knees. “I’ll admit, I’ve dreamt about this too. I always felt so ashamed for dreaming about sucking my best friend's cock.”

You press soft kisses to the head of his length, teasing the sensitive areas at the tip before kissing up and down the length. 

“Fuck, fuck, fuck.”

His evident desire for you encourages you, and your tongue swipes at the crown of his tip and swirls around it gently. 

“Oh my god.” His eyes shutter closed and you trace the veins in his dick with your tongue. 

“This h-has to be a dreeeaaaaam,” he whines as you make an exceptionally long stripe with the flat of your tongue. 

You pull off for a moment, humming. He springs his eyes open and watches as you reach behind your back and unsnap your bra. Your breasts escape with a bounce and his eyes widen, nearly bulging out of their sockets. 

“What the fuck,” he whines. “You have the most amazing tits.”

He reaches out to grasp them and you slap them away playfully. 

“Not yet,” you smirk. “Still trying to convince you you’re not asleep.” 

He sucks in his breath and puts his hands back to the bed to steady himself, eyes never leaving yours (except to stare at the luscious curves of your body). 

Grasping your breasts in both hands, you smash them together lightly in an elaborate show of what Jungkook wants most. You lean over his body and place the throbbing thickness of his cock in between your tits, allowing him to feel just how soft and warm they are. 

“Shit!” He yelps, grabbing his sheets in a tight fist. “Are you really tit-fucking me right now?!”

Slowly, you lift your body up and down, allowing his cock to feel each stroke of your breasts. You nod at his question and continue to pump up and down. 

“Still dreaming?” 

He whines and shakes his head, already feeling so close to the edge. His cock is slick from your teasing licks and the pressure of your tits surrounding him had his mind spinning with desire. 

“Ahhh, I’m so fucking close,” he warns.

You continue, speeding up the friction and pressure of your strokes. 

“I want you to cum on me, Kook,” you whisper encouragingly. “Cum on my tits, please?”

Jungkook feels like he’s a wire about to snap, and your thick, sultry voice and incredibly perfect breasts are the snips that breaks him apart. 

“Oh, shit,” he grunts. “Gonna paint your titties white, baby.”

His moans echo around the walls of his bedroom, small gasps of pleasure and your name escaping his perfectly plump pout. 

His hot load splatters on your chest, and you stroke him through each pulse of his cock. You’re slippery with his seed now, and when you pull away from his spent length, you make a show of rubbing in his cum over your chest.

“Okay, definitely not dreaming,” he says in a daze as he watches you lift a wet finger to your mouth, popping it in to clean it off. “Who knew you were so fucking kinky?” 

His confidence grows as he catches his breath. He can’t believe he’s sitting on his bed with you on your knees, breasts covered in his load. You’re suckling the cum off your finger like it’s his cock, and he’s desperate for more.

“There are lots of things you don’t know about me,” you shrug. 

Swiftly, he grabs you gently by your bicep and pulls you close, sucking at your lips until you’re both standing. 

“I plan to find out everything.” 

Suddenly, you’re switching positions and Jungkook is pushing you down into the bed. You lay flat in the center, body relaxed and eager for your best friend.

“What are you doing?” You ask. He’s still standing at the end of the bed, watching you get comfortable. Once he’s satisfied that you’re lying exactly how you want, he settles himself by your feet.

“Worshipping you,” he says as he lifts an ankle and presses gentle kisses to your calf. “Showing you how much I adore you.” More kisses, soft and sweet. “Showing you how I plan on treating you for the rest of your life.” 

He takes his time, lavishing your legs with his mouth. He kisses and sucks at any spot, sexual or not. He mouths at the roundness of your knees, your firm hamstrings. He presses his love into the skin of your thighs, mouthing his praises with each kiss. 

He reaches the dip of your hips and he gently kisses your exposed skin as he tugs your cotton panties off you. 

“I have loved every inch of you since before I can remember,” he praises as his lips skim over the mound of your cunt. “And I don’t plan on stopping soon.” 

Your body feels like it’s on fire, as if Jungkook lights a match at every spot his lips press against. Your eyes close, and you allow Jungkook to continue his pious worship of your body. 

He teases around your folds, kissing your labia ever so gently—making you gasp. He doesn’t linger long, only kisses you enough to stir the licking flames of heat in your belly.  

He kisses at your stomach, gently nibbling and laving at the softness there. You try to hide from him, try to hide your insecurities of your body in his thorough exploration, but he moves your hands. 

“I know you don’t like this part of your body,” he murmurs. His voice is so soft, so pure and sincere. “But I do. I love everything about you.” 

His tongue swirls around your belly button, making you gasp at the ticklish sensation. 

“You’re so pretty. So perfect.” 

He continues upwards, lips now trailing to your full breasts. He takes his time there, licking and kissing and flicking at your nipples with his tongue. It feels exhilarating—Jungkook’s mouth feels like everything you want it to feel like. His tongue is warm, and he bites with just enough pressure to make your back arch off the bed into his embrace.

His hands explore, taking stock of every millimeter of skin he can find. He wants to memorize every freckle, every bump, every scar and line. Your body is his paradise, and all he can think of is you, you, you.

One hand travels down your body as he moves his lips up your neck. It snakes down your stomach and deftly slides over your soaked core. You whine as you feel his fingers part your folds and dip into the wetness.

“So wet,” he says out loud, verbalizing every tantalizing detail of your body. “So perfect.”

His lips are finally at your own and you kiss him passionately, tongue swirling around his as he slides his two fingers past your clit and into your drenched hole. You gasp against his mouth, eyes widening as he slowly scissors his fingers into you and pumps slowly. It’s almost teasing, the way he fucks his fingers in you. Slow, firm movements with his powerful hands.

“Jungkook!” You gasp. He doesn’t reply, instead he bites at your lip and tugs, then trails his hot mouth back down to your nipples. He can’t get enough of your breasts and the slightly salty taste of him still lingering.

“You feel so good,” he says as he speeds his fingers up minutely. “So tight and wet for me.”

Your hips writhe in need. He’s giving you what you need, but not enough. You need more, more. You want to feel him, all of him, spearing you open.

“Please, Kook,” you groan. “I need you.”

He laughs softly against your nipple and sucks extra hard, letting it pop out of his mouth audibly.

“And I need you, my love.”

“Fuck me, please.” You’re desperate, thighs quaking from the slow teasing. “I want you to fuck me, Jungkook.”

Chills shudder down Jungkook’s spine and he’s powerless to say no, not when you demand it so well.

“With pleasure,” he agrees. He pulls his fingers from within you and copies your move, sliding them into his mouth to suck your essence off. 

He’s never looked sexier. His eyes are dark chocolate pools of burning intensity, and you feel your breath become shaky as you watch him clean his fingers with precision.

After he’s deemed his fingers sufficiently clean, he settles himself between your legs. Easily, he lifts your hips and shoves a pillow underneath, elevating you to a more comfortable position. He grabs your legs and tosses each over his shoulders so they’re higher in the air. 

“I’m going to fuck you so good, baby,” he promises as he rubs the tip of his cock on your soppy slit. “Condom?”

You shake your head, appreciative of his question but desperate to feel him completely.

“Birth control. Regularly tested. Haven’t had sex in a while,” you blurt out. “You good?”

He nods in agreement. “Same. Well, except the birth control. But, I’d take it if they made it for men.”

“Jungkook!” You whine. Your best friend is so easily sidetracked. “Please, can you fuck me?”

He grins. “Tsk, someone is impatient.”

A low moan is rumbling in your chest as he continues to rub his thick cock at your entrance.

“I swear to god, you’re the biggest tease.”

“Oh, I’m definitely the biggest.”

Before you can react, he’s pushing past your entrance and sliding deep in your walls. Your position makes his cock feel deep, and he bottoms out and stills there, eyes closed in bliss.

“Holy shit,” he gasps. “This is absolutely the best pussy I’ve ever felt.”

You wiggle your hips as you get used to the sensation of the delicious stretch.

“Please don’t tell me how many pussies you’ve felt when you’re balls deep inside of me.”

Jungkook turns his head and kisses at your legs resting on his shoulders, lavishing them with his praise once more as he keeps his cock buried inside your tight heat.

“Yours is the only one that matters. The only pussy I’ll ever be in for the rest of my life.”

“That’s a good answer,” you smile. “Now, fuck me, lover boy.”

Jungkook winks and grips your hips with his hands. He swiftly pulls out, enamored with the way his cock is already covered in your creamy essence, then eagerly pushes back in. He sets a pace and soon the sound of skin clapping on skin echoes around the room.

“Oh god!” You’re moaning loudly, unabashedly. You’re thankful that Jungkook’s old roommate, Yoongi, moved out to live with his boyfriend Hoseok months ago. He’d definitely complain about the noise for months. “Fuck, Jungkook, you feel so good.”

Jungkook fucks into you with ferocity, speed and power gradually rising as he feels his core tighten with the coming anticipation of release.

“Mmm, you look so fucking sexy like this,” he murmurs. “Getting fucked by your best friend’s fat cock.”

He moves a hand from your hip, trails it up your body to squeeze at your breast, before he’s cupping your face once again. His hips snap against yours and he loves the way your mouth utters little squeaks and gasps with each deep thrust into you.

“God, my beautiful girl,” he groans. “Can’t wait to cum in this pussy, shit, you got me so fucking close.”

You open your mouth desperately and Jungkook easily slips his thumb in. You latch on quickly and suck, tongue swirling around the tip like you’re sucking another cock. It nearly sends him over the edge and the speed of his hips matches his desperate need for more.

“Fucking hell,” he bites back. He can feel his belly tighten, driven further and further to the edge by the constricting wetness of your cunt. 

He pulls his thumb out and moves it down to where his cock spears into you, allowing your spit to swirl with his thumb around your clit. Your core tightens around him at the added stimulation and your back arches up in ecstasy.

“I’m so c-close, Kook,” you plead, as if begging for mercy. “Please, I want to cum so bad.”

The speed of his thumb increases, and he watches as your face twists in pleasure and desperation. 

“Cum on my cock, baby, let me see you fall apart. Show me what I’ve dreamt of for so long.”

A high and wanton cry ripples out of your body as he savagely increases his speed, both his cock and thumb working overtime to drive you towards your end. The butterflies that erupt in your lower stomach make your moans louder, higher. You’re so close, closer than ever. It’s building to an incredible crescendo.

He can tell you’re close—he sees it on your face as your back arches and your fists grip his sheets.

“You look like a fucking angel, baby,” he whines as he soaks in the vision of you writhing underneath him. “I bet you cum like an angel, too. Let me see it, let me see.”

With just a few more swirls of his thumb and his deep, hard strokes, you’re soaring over the edge into a pool of nothingness. Your cunt pulsates wildly around his length, milking and stroking it with your tight walls. You throw your head back, moaning out his name at the top of his lungs, letting his neighbors know just who fucks you so well.

“Holy shit,” he gasps, hips stuttering as he fucks into your juicy hole. “That was so fucking sexy.”

You grip his forearms, holding onto him tight and encourage him to go harder. “Cum inside me, Kookie, please. I’m all yours, make me yours.”

His heart feels like it might burst in his chest. He’s always wanted you to say it to him, to hand over your love to him like he does so easily to you. It’s all so much, so overwhelming, and the feeling of your hot cunt still fluttering around him sends him reeling into his own completion. 

He spills into you, warm seed coating your walls and pooling inside your womb. He fucks himself through each throb of his cock until he’s sure he’s drained every ounce of himself into you.

Your legs slip off his shoulders easily, and he gently pulls himself out of you. He falls beside you, panting with exertion, and wraps an arm around you.

After a few silent moments of catching your breath, Jungkook pulls you in close to him until he can koala-cling to you, arms and legs both wrapped around your body.

“Mine,” he whispers as he kisses your head. “All mine.”

You return the favor, clinging to your best friend—boyfriend—like he’s your only lifeline.

“All yours.”

“So, you’re telling me, you got together because of Minecraft?” Jimin asks, pointing a fork in your direction. It’s been months now since your grand virtual declaration of love for Jungkook. Months of bliss and romance, laughter and companionship. 

You were right all along. Jungkook is everything you’ve wanted in a man and more.

You’re sitting at your brother’s expensive dinner table, enjoying a meal with his family with your boyfriend at your side.

“Yeah, Jimin, I guess that’s what I’m saying,” you retort as you roll your eyes. “Minecraft and Tinder.”

Baby Jisoo is awake and in your brother’s arms, but she’s whining and wiggling to leave him.

“What’s wrong, Soo?” Namjoon asks with a pout on his lips. “Why don’t you want daddy anymore?”

Jimin snorts at his husband and you hold out your arms for your baby niece. “Come here, baby, I know you want auntie.”

Namjoon dutifully hands over his daughter, sulking that he’s been picked over for his sister. 

You cradle the baby in your arms, expecting her to calm once she’s there, but she continues to fuss. She’s thrusting her arms out and nearly crying, reaching towards Jungkook who’s busy chowing down on Jimin’s homemade ramen.

“I think she wants you, Kook,” you murmur. He looks at you, then to the baby, then back to you, before he wipes his hands and face clean with a napkin.

“Oh, okay,” he whispers, slowly taking the baby from your arms with your help. “Hello, ma’am.”

Namjoon and Jimin laugh. “She’s a baby, Jungkook, not an elderly woman,” your brother teases.

Jungkook doesn’t listen. He’s too busy cooing at the baby in his arms and playing with her tiny hands. Namjoon turns his attention away and looks at you.

“Guess I won’t be the only provider of grandchildren for much longer.”

You playfully glare at him and turn away to watch your boyfriend. Watching Jungkook interact with your niece makes your heart swell, your soul sing. He’d be a perfect father.

“I swear, if he teaches her how to play Minecraft, he’s banned from the household,” Jimin grumbles. “This is a No-Nerd-Zone.”

Jungkook cradles the child and rocks back and forth, singing her a soft, made-up song, before he looks over at you.

“Hey, I want one of these,” he smiles. “Can we have one?”

You lay a hand on your stomach, a soft bump not quite visible yet. It’s only been one test, the lines faintly indicating ‘positive’ on the stick. You wanted to make sure, get confirmation before you spill the beans.

“Sure, Kookie.”

He grins and leans over to kiss you, before turning his attention back to the baby. “Okay, Jisoo, now let me tell you all about the Endermen.”

Jimin groans. “Oh my god, do not give Minecraft facts to my infant!”

tag list - @giadalin @nohayarcoirissintormenta @pjmislovely @xhazmania @marcoazam2 @eggbutnotyolk @feel-the-sunset @unicornbabylover @aretha170 @jeonmisha @hordanhearsawhooo 

© ppersonna - 2021 - do not repost on any site, or translate without express permission from author.

[hoe-doroki]

ana reads bnha ch46

previous chapter here first chapter here next chapter here

It seems I’m an idiot and the post I made for this got deleted. Let’s go again!

You heard it here first—KacchOcha is now on my multishipping list. I think it’s super interesting and they could totally both make each other better. I still like IzuOcha too (and bkdk, let’s be real) but I think that there are a lot of possibilities here. Just imagine like a TodoDeku and KacchOcha situation? I kind of love it.

I also ship Ochako and this internship. Love it for her.

😭😭😭😭 Guys, if you ever need something, my DMs are always open! Asks are always open! Don’t suffer alone 😭😭😭😭

This is curious to me though because…does he? I mean, of course he does. Our three boys find themselves in a situation of life and death that they didn’t have to be in. And he wishes that his friend would have talked to him.

But, on the other hand, they kind of get out of Hosu with a net gain. Stain is caught. The three of them are fine—Iida has his hand injury, but we haven’t seen that stand in his way (yet?). They’re put in a situation where they have to lie, but that doesn’t really end up with long term consequences. Idk, I’d like to talk to Deku about his thoughts on this, please and thank you.

Okay, this brings about a worthwhile question. Do quirks…age? Like, we know that people can develop and grow their quirks, and we also know that quirks can bring about negative effects on your body, but do quirks themselves deteriorate as you age? I mean, Bakugou describes using his quirk like using a muscle and, granted, people can keep their bodies in great shape into old age, but things do naturally break down. So I’m not asking if, like, landing a dash is harder for Gran Torino now that he’s older—I mean, it doesn’t really show, but I assume it is—but does the dash itself ever get slower or creakier or start malfunctioning? Will Bakugou’s explosions eventually get weaker without more upkeep? Will Sero’s tape become thinner or weaker? I have questions! It appears not—provided you keep exercising your quirk, but that’s kinda hard to believe!

Overall: Gran Torino is a weird dude, ya’ll. I hope we get more backstory from him eventually. But yeah, this chapter is pretty scattered, since it’s everyone leaving to do their own thing so, without going into each of those individually, I don’t have much to say! Except that we got our first frame of the full Dekusquad! Woo! But I really love a lot of these internships—Uraraka’s specifically—so I’m excited! Not to mention that the Hero Killer stuff with Iida/Deku/Todoroki is my FAVE. BIG FAVE COMING UP FOLX

[getinthefunvee]

// hey lovelies. i wasn’t around yesterday (well, a bit in the morning while you were all snoozing) because i was really wrung out. have some fun chatter about my disability and summer below the readmore. it’s going to become relevant to how active i am on here when it’s really really warm out. aka ‘wtf is EB, ari, and why tf won’t you shut up about it?’

figured this was better than clogging everyone’s dash. yesterday was the first properly warm day, and i could sort of feel my soul leave my body for the summer lol. on top of my usual mental ish (major depressive disorder; anxiety; mild ?ptsd) and neurodivergent ish (ADD, huge huge introvert living in a uniquely extroverted microcosm), i have a genetic condition called EB (epidermolysis bullosa)--don’t google it unless you want to skrem, i’m ‘lucky’ in that i have a milder version of it, so i look ‘normal’ to most people (having an invisible disability is its own special hell) but my skin is super fragile, and the summer heat makes it worse. folx with EB tend to burn through nutrients faster, so we’re always exhausted (similar to folx with chronic fatigue syndrome, with varying severity). like we are always soul-deep tired. EB basically means the connective tissue in our skin doesn’t work right, so our skin looks normal, but it’s extremely delicate--even slight friction can cause a scrape or tear, any sustained friction (think bra strap, waistband of your jeans, shoes) causes blisters. there are degrees of severity, from ‘sometimes i get a blister’ to ‘blisters on inside of throat’ hellishness; i fall on the most severe end of the least severe variety, so i don’t get skin damage from stuff like shaking someone’s hand, but i can rub my skin raw from just using the wrong kind of towel or get cuts trying to peel a clove of garlic with a particularly tough husk. 

but back to the blisters! skip this para if you’re squicked by skin. you know the worst shoes you ever wore in your life, the ones that gave you horrific open blisters? that’s me, in any (or no) shoes, with padding/bandages. it means that sometimes, i can’t walk half a block without my feet being wrecked. it means i always have cuts and raw patches on my hands, and it means i’m super self-conscious about the scratch/scab looking wounds that i’ll get on my shoulders or chest or face from just like. using a towel. :/ they’re small enough that it looks like i’ve picked a spot (nice 9.9) which just makes me feel self-conscious because, yeah, it’s not a good Look. 

so summer is extra horrible because 1) feet are constantly wrecked; 2) walking even short distances is physically exhausting; 3) i’m even more exhausted than my usual horrible exhaustion; 4) the pain and anxiety trigger reverse seasonal affective disorder (yup, ‘summer SAD’ is a thing!); 5) public transport here doesn’t have a/c, so it can literally be over 100F in a bus with no open windows, crammed full of people, and nobody will give up their seat because i don’t ‘look’ disabled; 6) summer = tank tops & shorts/skirts, which means more of my wounds/scabs are visible, and i can either cover them in 10,000 bandaids--which, btw, rip EB skin when you try to take them off, super fun--or leave them out and people stare, but not wearing cool clothes = 7) overheating. apparently i’m one of the lucky folx with EB who also don’t sweat enough, which sounds like it’d be a great thing?? but instead i just overheat like a dog trapped in a locked car.

if all of that wasn’t enough, i also have endometriosis and mild hypothyroid, and as an added bonus, the number of genuine external stressors is so severe that even my therapist doesn’t understand how i haven’t had a full-on breakdown. GOOD STUFF.

wow this got long. you’re still with me? i love u.

so very, very tl;dr but here are the things you can help me with during the long horrible summer months of eternal suffer-tude:

1) be gentle with me. 2) be patient with me.  3) if you can, try not to insta-reply the second i post a reply--maybe, idk, stick it in a queue or post it a few hours or more later? it’s ok if you can’t, but it can help alleviate my ‘not replying fast enough, not good enough’ anxiety a little. 4) please don’t try to ‘fix’ things or give me advice; i genuinely love you for the intention, but this stuff is chronic. and i have better days/weeks/months! and once the external (read: financial) stressors back off, if they ever do, it’ll be a lot easier for me to cope. 5) do feel free to send me affection, positivity, cute animals, etc <3 6) pls don’t feel sorry for me; again, i totally get the intention, but i can’t feel sorry for me, i just gotta keep on keepin’ on, yeah? 7) if i don’t instantly reply to DMs/disco convos, please don’t repeatedly ping me. i know i project extroversion, but very often i just don’t have the spoons for this. giving me a poke once a day is ok! just know that if i don’t respond right away, it’s not because i don’t love you/want to interact, it’s often because i’m just trying to function that day. 8) like honestly another thing that would help would be money 8) because the current situation is such that we’re worried about shit like the utilities being turned off, being able to afford food, etc. this isn’t something i’d ever wanted to ask for, but if you’re sitting there like ‘wow what would help’ it’s money, so like. my ko-fi is arieila <3 but please know that just wanting to interact with me is doing me plenty of good and all you can really do.

tl;dr part 2: one day i’ll move to a climate where it’s cold all year ‘round and i’ll be so much healthier.

thank you for coming to my hot mess ted talk.

[notjustagirltattoopodcast]

Not Just A Girl: Introduction

You can listen to the introduction episode here and on Spotify. Or you can listen to it on YouTube with subtitles/closed captions here (I don't have any footage to go with the intro but have shared some photos from previous NJAG events).

NOT JUST A GIRL: Tattoo Podcast EPISODE TRANSCRIPT

Season 1, Episode 0: Introduction

Hello everyone and welcome to Not Just A Girl where every week I give you a glimpse into the lives and art practice of tattooers I admire through an intersectional feminist lens. We will discuss how they came to tattooing, their passions and experiences what informs their practice and how they enact resistance against the patriarchy with their art and just by being themselves.

Before we begin, I would like to acknowledge the Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander people who are the traditional custodians of this land that was stolen and never ceded. I am honoured to be on the ancestral land of the Awabakal people where this podcast is recorded and produced. I pay my respects to the Elders, past and present and extend my recognition to their descendants.

My name is Eddy, I’m an artist, tattooer, angry feminist and the owner of FLT Tattoo Studio in Newcastle NSW. I’ve been tattooing for just over ten years now and it’s through my experiences as a tattooer that I found my voice as a feminist as well as a platform to contribute to my community by supporting other artists and doing what I love.

On Not Just A Girl you will hear from people who are passionate about tattooing and want to influence the community to create a safer and more inclusive space for artists and clients alike. My intention is to highlight the experience of women, trans, non-binary and queer folx in the tattoo community and to give them a platform to share their ideas and feelings about topics that have informed their practice.

Not Just A Girl actually had its beginnings as a tattoo flash day in 2017. It was after an incredibly disappointing tattoo show in Sydney that was little more than a display of white male privilege and misogyny where women were reduced to sexual objects, that I started a group chat with a bunch of women who I knew were just as disillusioned as I was. We discussed how we could resist the status quo and make space for ourselves, we came up with the idea of a flash day for female identifying artists to come together, make amazing tattoos and raise money for women in need.

Melanie Milne, Sasha Mezoghlian and I, with help from some of the most amazing tattooers in Australia came up with Not Just A Girl. In our first year we managed to raise $45k and in our second, almost 95k for charities addressing gendered violence.

But beyond the money we raised and how good it felt to give back, we had found something really special. We had built a community of likeminded people who were there because they were passionate about tattooing and passionate about enacting change in society to bring about equality. We learnt that as a community we had power, and that we could do amazing things when we worked together for a greater cause.

The flash day has since been on hold as we’ve all focused on our busy careers, but everyone involved has continued to work towards building a better future for tattooing.

Right now, the world is in chaos in the midst of a global pandemic and many tattooers have made the choice to stop working or have had restrictions imposed on them to help curb the spread of the coronavirus. This is unprecedented in our time and for many of us, our identity and even self-worth is deeply invested in tattooing, so it’s difficult.

Tattoos play an important role in helping people express their identity, it’s one of the oldest professions and I believe it’s an important part of our human experience. For women and other marginalised groups in particular, when we mark our body we rebel against the patriarchy and reclaim our autonomy.

I have felt a huge loss these past few weeks being disconnected from the practice I love so much. As I’ve tried to navigate through my grief and establish a plan for how I might proceed I keep coming back to the importance of community. To those with privilege, like myself, we have the opportunity here to take a step back and imagine a life outside of ridiculous capitalist pressures of productivity and we can refocus our energies to contributing to a happier, kinder and more inclusive world.

While I am unable to tattoo right now, I can still talk about tattooing and while I can’t proceed with any Not Just A Girl events, we can still rely on the strength of that community to bring a little joy to others. Over the coming weeks and months, I will be chatting to some people I admire in tattooing via Zoom to share their stories and experiences with you. I am really excited to see how this podcast develops, making new friends and learning new skills in the process.

Along with this podcast I will be sharing the footage of some of the interviews on YouTube and you can stay up to date by following our Instagram @notjustagirl_tattoo. I will link all the information for this podcast and my guests in the show notes. Please take a moment to subscribe, follow and share Not Just A Girl and all the artists involved to help spread the love of tattooing.

Thank you so much for taking the time to listen today, I really hope you enjoyed it and continue to follow along as I speak to a new artist each week. I hope you all have a wonderful day if you can.

And remember to be kind to others

And fuck the patriarchy!

[womenofcolor15]

#FREETIANNA: Online Petition & Social Media DEMAND Charges Against BLM Activist Tianna Arata Be DROPPED!

An online petition and the #FREETIANNA hashtag on Twitter is gaining attention as they demand charges against Black Lives Matter activist Tianna Arata be dropped. She’s facing up to 15 years in jail following a peaceful protest that turned violent. More inside…

The Internet is sounding off after Black Lives Matter activist Tianna Arata was hit with eight charges that could possibly land her in jail for 15 years. An online petition and the trending Twitter hashtag #FREETIANNA is demanding the charges filed against the 20-year-old youth activist be dropped because they believe she has been wrongfully accused.

Tianna now faces eight charges following a protest that took place in late July. On July 21st, Tianna was taken into police custody after a five-hour protest in San Luis Obispo. Six police officers surrounded her to put her in handcuffs as demonstrators watched and yelled at police.

A woman named Mel – who claim to be friends with Tianna - shared a video of Tianna being arrested by police "for peacefully protesting alongside myself and our community” with the #freetianna hashtag. Check it below:

THEY KIDNAPPED MY BEST FRIEND OFF OF THE STREET. NO RIGHTS WERE READ. SPREAD #freetianna https://t.co/C6QdpivvpF

— mel (@melissayumm) August 10, 2020

The online petition states Tianna’s arrest was unjust and noted the SLO PD left out important facts to paint a specific narrative:

The subsequent press release from the SLO PD on events leading up to the arrest omits important facts to create a false narrative depicting the protesters as promoting violence. Tianna and other protest leaders have led numerous peaceful protests over the past several months. It's clear that the SLO County District Attorney and SLO PD are using the arrest of Tianna as a political statement to try and suppress their first amendment right to protest. Tianna’s arrest and charges were unjust. Our community should come together to support her and her family. Protect our young black lives movement leaders right to protest and demand that the district attorney not pursue any charges against Tianna Arata. Our young black leaders deserve to be heard, seen, and supported.

According to local news outlet The Tribune, police asked District Attorney Dan Dow to file eight charges against Tianna, including four felony counts of false imprisonment, one count of felony conspiracy and three misdemeanors. She could now be facing up to 15 years in prison.

A tentative arraignment date has been set for September.

As of Monday afternoon, more than 100,000 people have signed the petition. You can find it here.

The way the police waited till we were alone with a few friends and rushed and took my best friend in front of my eyes, in front of her mother it was traumatizing. They used excessive force Tianna could barley keep up with the 6 grown men forcing her to the car.

— mel (@melissayumm) August 10, 2020

”My best friend is being charged with 8 charges including 5 felonies,” Tianna’s friend Mel tweeted. “For peacefully protesting alongside myself and our community. There was no riot it was a beautiful peaceful protest filled with Black and Brown joy.”

I am traumatized, even hearing loud noises triggers me. Now imagine how she feels. Her life and future is on the line. She dreams big and has plans for her future. Do not let this small town take that away from her. Tianna is the sweetest, most passionate, and loving person I kno

— mel (@melissayumm) August 10, 2020

”I am traumatized, even hearing loud noises triggers me,” she continued. “Now imagine how she feels. Her life and future is on the line. She dreams big and has plans for her future. Do not let this small town take that away from her. Tianna is the sweetest, most passionate, and loving person I kno”

It’s unclear what lead up to the incident. SLO PD claims protesters damaged the rear window of a car, causing broken glass to fall on a 4-year-old that was sitting in the back seat. The hood of the car was also reportedly damaged. Mel tweeted that’s not the case. She said a car ambushed Tianna’s body almost hitting her:

The cars window who was hit by a skateboard was done AFTER The driver RAN INTO PROTESTORS. SLOPD IS TRYING TO PAINT THERE NARRATIVE OF A RIOT. THERE WAS NONE. Continue to tweet #freetianna and #TiannaArata We need as much attention as we can get. Tianna’s future is on the line.

— mel (@melissayumm) August 10, 2020

Here’s a clip from the alleged incident below:

#freetianna there was NO imprisonment on the freeway and the car that “had a 4 year old in the back” ACCELERATED INTO PROTESTORS FIRST. the freeway portion of the march was peaceful and occupying the roadway does not give ANYONE the right to use a car as a DEADLY WEAPON!!! pic.twitter.com/fHMsQ4vU2d

— nicole huffman (@nicoleahuffman) August 10, 2020

The Tribune’s editorial board requested District Attorney Dan Dow’s office to drop the charges against Tianna:

"Asking the District Attorney's Office to come down so hard on Tianna Arata smacks of vindictiveness and is only going to further divide our community," the editorial board wrote.

"If police wanted to teach a lesson to civil rights protesters who blocked Highway 101, they should consider it mission accomplished. They have already made a sufficient example of Arata...by arresting her in a public show of authority and accusing her of a variety of crimes," they wrote. "Now, they're just piling on, asking for four felony counts of false imprisonment and one count of felony conspiracy, plus three misdemeanors."

"Charging Arata with serious felonies for what is essentially an act of civil disobedience is absurd, especially in a progressive city that stresses tolerance, sensitivity and diversity," the editorial board said.

Word about what’s happening to Tianna is spreading quickly on Twitter. People have been tweeting up a storm in her defense:

#FREETIANNA a black woman named TIANA ARATA is about to be in prison for 15 years because she held an peaceful protest.

A BLACK WOMAN IS GOING TO PRISON FOR 15 YEARS FOR HOLDING AN PEACEFUL PROTEST

Fuck the land of the freedom! This is racism! This is corruption!

RT THIS pic.twitter.com/bDtIgEZGSK

— / blm acab (@crystalzmethyd) August 10, 2020

no matter what the cops do to try and silence the protestors, it wont go unnoticed, sign this petition to #FreeTianna because all she did was participate in a peaceful protest and now she could be facing up to 15yrs in jail!! https://t.co/iKKzWI18fF

— aj (@KHARASZN) August 10, 2020

#FREETIANNA #TIANNAARATA. SAY IT BACK. LETS MAKE HER NAME TREND WITH #FREETIANNA TO PUT IT BACK ON THE TRENDS. ITS GETTING PRESS NOW. https://t.co/L3akXiP3im

— elijah daniel (@elijahdaniel) August 10, 2020

#FREETIANNA i was in the same protest she organized and she always advocated for a safe and peaceful protest and vehemently rejected any form of violence or rioting throughout the protest, she is innocent and our local county’s PD are trying to ruin her life. FREE HER!

— carlos (@carlosrobnson) August 10, 2020

SHE HAS BEEN ORGANIZING PEACEFUL PROTESTS FOR MONTHS IN SAN LUIS AND LEADS US IN BEAUTIFUL SONG WHEN OUTSIDERS TRY TO SPARK TENSION. DONT LET OUR COUNTY PAINT HER AS A FELON!!! THE CHARGES ARE UNSUBSTANTIATED #FreeTianna #BLM pic.twitter.com/fKMu9EhWKE

— nicole huffman (@nicoleahuffman) August 10, 2020

TWEET #FREETIANNA, PUT THIS EVERYWHERE. DO NOT LET @SLOSheriff GET AWAY WITH THIS. https://t.co/z6UOTSTwSC pic.twitter.com/oDHhY948vY

— elijah daniel (@elijahdaniel) August 10, 2020

            View this post on Instagram

                  Day 2 - I need you to understand why I’m out here making myself so visible. As a white womxn and comrade, I have no interest in your “thank yous” or any sort of recognition in this movement. I am out here because many Black leaders in our community are not currently able to be out here. So many are being surveilled by SLO PD, Tianna in particular to an extreme extent. I am out here because Tianna is NOT a pawn, she is a 20 year old brilliant, kind young Black womxn with hopes and dreams. SLO PD and other white supremacists and racists are trying to destroy her future, and we can’t let them. We cannot, I will NOT let them. I will say it for all of you in the back: you can drive by and yell racist things at me all you want, flip me off, etc.: we will still be out here reminding you that if you aren’t fighting for her, you need to go check your racism. . I am also out here because yesterday a womxn announced her candidacy to run for SLO city council. Do NOT be fooled by Abrianna Torres’, she doesn’t have Black folx’ & other POC’s interests at heart & I beg of you not to vote for her if you care about our Black community. She is supported by a known white supremacist in the area who has used extreme hate speech against Black leaders in this movement. She has support of businesses like Ambiance, who we have already seen how they have treated protestors. She has told a Black youth leader in this movement that his privilege was a choice. If you live in SLO city itself and want to run for city council to represent the interests of Black folx and all minorities here in SLO county, please head over to @communityroots.project and speak to them, the deadline is August 12th. I know this seems like a very big thing to do, but we truly need candidates who are with us and care about the Black community. . P.S. Thank you to my new friend who showed up to protest with me today. Thanks to you, our turnout increased by 100%! Just a reminder that all it takes is one person to keep speaking up, & you can be that person. I don’t care if you are out in your front yard, on a corner with your family, or anywhere. Be visible & show up for Tianna.

A post shared by Karissa (@nochickennuggets) on Aug 1, 2020 at 8:23pm PDT

  HAPPENING NOW: Demonstration in support of local activist Tianna Arata who was arrested following a protest in July. Community members calling on DA Dan Dow to drop the charges against her. pic.twitter.com/unRJ8Mxp9H

— Megan Healy (@HealyMegan) August 8, 2020

In addition to the online petition, a GoFundMe account has been set up to help pay her with legal fees. The goal amount was set for $10,000 and they've exceeded that goal, raking in over $33,000. All of the remaining proceeds will be donated as bail funds for other social justice activists.

Photo: YouTube Screenshot

[Read More ...] source http://theybf.com/2020/08/10/freetianna-online-petition-social-media-demand-charges-against-blm-activist-tianna-arata-