#but october feels good already
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i am so obsessed with how like. taken as read the ot3 are at this point. like on the one hand it feels like they've been building up to this for ages but on the other hand it kind of feels like i blinked and we skipped right past some Major Turning Point where everything got spelled out and we're just already in firmly Established Relationship-land. obviously tarvek is too well-protected for anyone to assassinate openly, look how angry his boyfriend and girlfriend are at the idea of anyone threatening him. at this point i'm half-convinced agatha's just going to refer to her boyfriends in passing to someone else and no one's even going to comment on it until van finds out twenty pages later and immediately starts making everyone pay up
#girl genius#i just. the matching frowns. tarvek's deliberately-foppish not-quite-innocent shit-eating grin and folded hands#i'm obsessed with this panel i'm obsessed with this page i'm obsessed with this entire week's comics#and everything that everyone has chosen to say about these three since. man i don't even remember. october?#when was the comment about albia worrying colette will join the polycule i forget#i mean and also everyone has said about these three ever. violetta telling gilvek to stop flirting lives in my head rent free#but the entire last month has just been. i am Reeling what has HAPPENED#i was ready to live off the group hug for the next YEAR and every comic then has felt like a brand new brick????#except for krosp and norville's grand adventure which. well that also felt like a set of bricks but very different ones#also i'm only half-convinced bc a) agatha *is* awfully good at big dramatic speeches#and it's still hard to imagine the Big Relationship(s) Upgrade(s) happening without one#b) it also feels extremely plausible that instead of agatha talking about her boyfriends to a third party#gil or tarvek will refer to *their* boyfriend to agatha (who will not comment on that until van finds out twenty pages later etc)#anthyding can hadplen etc and it feels so much like suddenly it already has. what timeline are we IN#sarah don't look#nyquil don't look
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Maybe I did this to myself but it does irk me when people see me knitting and they ask who itās for and I say itās for me and the immediate reaction is āyou should sell itā yeahā¦ let me spend at least a weekās worth of my free time making an item I like, want, and would wear just to sell it on etsy, making at most a Ā£2 profit on materials and not being compensated for my time whatsoever šš»
#i say maybe i did this to myself because historically i have gifted most of the items i have knitted#because the venn diagram of things i like to knit vs things i like to wear is actually 2 circles that donāt touch#i looove making hats. i HATE wearing hats#also i love making baby clothes but i donāt have a baby and iām not going to have a baby#however lately iāve gotten really into knitting socks and i really like to wear knit socks. itās like the most affordable way for me to get#quality wool socks. and iām going to be watching my shows anyway. the time will pass anyways#but it feels like people are deliberately making me feel weird for wanting to make stuff for myself and not profit off my hobby#and like iāve made 3 pairs of socks to gift already because ātis the season or whatever. and iāve started another pair for a friend whose#birthday is in january#genuinely itās very weird to hear āyou should sell itā or āoh i want one!!ā about an item iām making for myself. after 18 years of gifting#or donating basically everything iāve ever knitted. like iāve gifted 2 double bed size crochet blankets#everyone iāve known whoās had a baby has gotten a cardigan or a blanket or hats or all of the above#i spent october making poppies for the church. iāve never even stepped foot in my village church mind you. my neighbour asked me to help#do you know what i own? that iāve knitted? a pair of mittens and a pair of socks.#you want some socks from me? alright. thatās anywhere between Ā£6 and Ā£10 for the yarn and thatās optimistic#iām currently making myself a pair with hand-dyed yarn that cost me Ā£18 including delivery#the needles i use cost me more than Ā£10. timeā¦ letās call it 24 hours per sock#i donāt know anyone with 18 years experience who makes minimum wage so letās call it an even 600 for my time. tbh#DO YOU SEE how this isnāt a viable side hussle??? i physically cannot charge what my socks are worth#if i like you and youāre willing to wait; socks are free or cost whatever the yarn costs#if i donāt like or know you venmo me Ā£620. and youāre still going to have to wait.#just pisses me OFF when people suggest i make an etsy page and they say it like theyāre doing me a favour or giving me great financial#advice. like youāve seen me sitting here all evening and iām barely done with the cuff.. do you actually think selling these for Ā£20 maximum#is going to help me out. iām not selling them. theyāre FOR me. iām making them because i want them#also when my friendās family was saying this to me and i was like āwell the yarn cost a fiverā and they got quiet and i was thinking yeahā¦#a fiver is the maximum you cheapskates would pay isnāt it. a fiver is cheap sock yarn bought on sale. or yarn that probably isnāt actually#good for socks. like donāt presume to give me financial advice when youāre this out of touch with the market please#next person who asks when iām going to start selling socks is getting this whole rant in entirety tbh i donāt care anymore#personal#edited to add that i didnāt even get into etsy fees or whether i would even be noticed among the mountain of dropshippers LOL
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i wanna be sylveon for halloween but the only full ears/tail/neck bow set i can find is 134 DOLLARS.........
#i mean i guess i could hypothetically do commissions or something but like i cant rlly see anyone paying for my drawings#not to mention i dont remember the last time i had motivation#ellie probably could bc faere less mental and faer art is prettier.but then thatd be faer money technically so i couldnt take that#maybe i could try selling the lil bracelets i make and stuff.......but idk how mailing things works and mailing stuff costs money too#and having somewhere to sell stuff in the first place does too#idk.i had this whole thing planned out and all but its already almost october#and i dont think any amount of getting half my aunts doordash pay is gonna get me there anytime soon#i guess i should just choose something else.but i already planned the entire outfit and itll all go to waste!!!#idk it rlly just seems like everything i do turns out to be all for nothing#sorry im not feeling good rn and not just bc of this
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this is a test
#iām bored i just wanna see how many words i can put in the tags like will it just keep going on forever or will they stop me like i know th#the tag limit is 30 ok so the iindividual tag limit is 140 characters thatās actually so rude i wanted to keep going forever and see how lo#g this could be but i guess we can do this 30 times ok what the flip should i talk about hm i was playing the guitar today but i rage quit#ause the song was hard and hurting my fingers! ermmmmm it was sunny ok this is boring letās think of more exciting things to type hmmm acco#ding to all known laws of aviation- jk iām not doing the bee movie script but can you imagine i think that would be funny hmmmmm words i lo#e podcasts so bad thatās a fact no one has ever know before my blog definitely isnāt all about audio dramas the people are definitely not a#ready aware of this jesus christ this is only the seventh one of these this is actually quite a lot of space i underestimated how much i ha#e to type btw thereās probably spelling mistakes in here somewhere or autocorrect has been annoying but i cba to retype anything so i donāt#care lolllllllllllll how do you feel about oscar malevolent i feel a normal amount actually (lie) yk what i really miss sam and colin alrea#y like iām actually not okay i really hope we hear from sam again in s2 and also colin ngl i hope ur in the computers soz or not dead miss#im like a bastard my paranoid it king ok erm im running out of things to say um heartstopper s3 was crazy good i cried lmao i love gay peop#e so much itās crazy i hope it gets renewed for s4 i need to reread the comics lowkey and the books theyāre all so talented for being so yo#ng it scares me ngl !!!!!! the tmagp hiatus is getting to me slightly like february in reality is soon and not that far away for how podcas#ts go but seriously how am i supposed to live until then without knowing what happened. please colin be alive. ive only just realised i can#use fills stops. sorry thatās made everything a bit messy. i shouldāve been doing this before. whoops. anyways. hi mutuals i love you all s#much i hope you enjoy my rambles and shitposts cause i enjoy yours very much! never think youāre being annoying i literally donāt care be a#annoying as you want posts as much as you want i am ur biggest fan <3 im getting a bit fatigued from typing like my mind is blank basically#now itās just turned into a. stream of consciousness but i donāt really have any thoughts to put here idk if weāre halfway ermmmm omg itās#lmost halloween how crazy is that time is flying by i kinda forgot it was october lmao. itās wild how itās basically almost christmas. like#what. thatās illegal. how is it wintertime again. what the flip. i miss summer already take me backkkkkkk. i hope my phone doesnāt crash or#smth cause iāve not saved this as a draft and i cba to do any of this again. maybe i should save it. ok i will when i reach the next tag bc#ok it stopped me but iāve saved it and holy jesus itās a lot of text im just sat here giggling thereās really no point to any of this other#than me being bored sooooooooooooooooo (imagine if i just did the letter o for every character wouldnāt that be crazy) so wait thereās 140#haracters and 30 tags so whatās 30 x 140. someone hurry. i havenāt done maths lessons in two and a half years iāve forgotten everything wai#let me get the calculator app ok im back it said 4100 characters so. i dont know how many words that roughly is but its. a decent amount. o#what the flip why am i wasting tag space with maths. i hate maths. my screen time has been actually soooooooooo bad recently like damn some#one put my phone in a block of ice please joshua gillespie style. my mind is running out of things to say. do i talk about myself. im james#im 18 which is weird cause wdym im an adult go away. ive run out of facts. i love podcasts and procedural dramas that stupid firefighter sh#w is my life unfortunately. i think chappell roan should be the queen of england instead of king charles. i dont like having a king cause#ho needs men in power not me. ok um this is the last tag equal rights for all. yolo. the time will pass anyways! thank u boredom ok bye gn:
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Omg i cant believe that I have 3 weeks paid holiday now.
I will draw so much
As I found out that I draw the best with promts,headcanons or suggest, please feel free to send me some or link them!
I know I'm not the best artist in the wild but I enjoy drawing for others ā¤ļø
please keep in mind that I do traditional drawings and they take a while
Drawings that are in the making:
Maedhros and sauron in angband (almost finished but it's for a promt in the end of the month)
A young luthien being slightly eldritch in the woods (made a small one with ink decided to draw it bigger)
Gil-galad In the same style as my elrond one (I saw the fighting scene from trop and can't get him out of my head)
A older gimli from the game "return to moria"
And last but not least:
Taash from dragon age looking like a lesbian thirst trap ( I have the sketch finished and I was hollering)
Since it's October it can be that I'm doing just line arts or more black and white with a little bit of color .
#traditional art#silmarillion#tolkien#art#fanart#dragon age veilguard#silm art#im taggin the Fandoms for what im already drawing but feel free to suggest other!!!#if nobody is sending me something or linking me with interesting post i do it the old fashioned way and stalk around on tumblr on my own#please look at my drawings to see what is my style and to not be disappointed because im not so good#love you all hope you have a nice October#i forgot to put the tag for elden ring#elden ring
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Lol I keep on doing this, saying I'd come back to tumblr to only disappear again šš
#and i hate it bc i miss being on here#but also i don't have to force myself or feel guilty for it#bc if i'm fr being on social media is just so time consuming and also not what is good for my mental health often#and that includes tumblr#it's not even that it's a toxic place (at least not the content i'm consuming) but sometimes i just rather spend my time with people irl#meeting someone than on social media and like focus on my life#the last month or so was just really difficult for me and i haven't been feeling so bad mentally in forever#i mean it always is like that that time of the year but i feel like i was worse this year#whenever autumn comes around with the darkness and cold i seem to hit a low mentally#when i tell you how much better my mood is in summer spring how much better i feel everyday regardless of everything else#i get people like autumn but for me its literally the worst and winter too altough at some point it gets better#maybe i adapt and maybe because i spend more time outside around christmas when i go home that's usually a turning point#and ig also the lights of december make it a bit better#but mid october to november is awful#this year the weather was much worse beginning of october was much worse#i feel like i lowkey have this seasonal mood disorder idk#but i barely managed to go to classes and i had no motivation#usually i always make myself study and do the things i have to atleast altough i often terribly procrastinate#but now i was barely able to do this and i had things to do but i couldn't make myself i missed a deadline closely#luckily my professors are the best but i felt so horrible for it how i was unable to get it done#sunlight is just so good for my mood and ik how doctors say how you should avoid it because you can get skincancer#but like i'd rather than my mental health being this bad (not that i want either)#i already miss summer so much and being happier#but tbh i haven't felt this good as I do today in weeks and even this whole week was better#i exercised more than usual altough i tried to in the last weeks i couldn't as often as i normally do so maybe this actually helps a lot#and i studied yesterday today and i will tomorrow i finally feel motivation again#besides i also tried to break up with my bf so that was also tough but i couldn't lol#i tried talking to him and tell him in the nicest way but he didn't get what i was trying to do and i couldn't say more bc i felt horrible#but maybe that's for the better altough i had these thoughts for a while that he just isn't the one for me and that we're too different...#i do really like him as a person the way he treats me and i'm still into him but i just felt like it wouldn't work
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The devil Dirk on your shoulder.
Silly quick cosplay before Halloween night is over, inspired by a Dirk comic I saw earlier this month. (X)
#ahh im embarrassed now that im about to post lmao#is it like a dead meme to be doing sloppy cosplays of fan works these days? i feel like i never see ppl doing this anymore#((comic OP if u want me to unlink just dm me ill repost without the quote))#idk if its even gonna link tumblr was giving me grief ab adding links recently#laughing about my raccoon ears bc i dont have devil horns surprisingly (dont have a halo either tbh)#homestuck#dirk#dirk cosplay#me#selfie#ShitPost.exe#Cori.exe#Image.exe#my back is fucking killing me from standing in heels trying to pose for this hfffff idk if it was worth it#and the best pose i ended up with was this plain straightforward one#striders#halloween#idk what tags this needs man#cosplay#shitpost#shoulda waited till morning when my hair will be dry and fluffy but its halloween night rn and i know im gna be too cold in the morning#i s2g this is the coldest october ive ever experienced its fucking frigid in my room rn#anyway lemme post bc i already have literal and figurative cold feet. nini everyone happy hoe-lloween to all and to all a good ni
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kinda funny that like.. my best friend could only get me THE WIZARD by shipping it to my sisters place in nyc and having her bring it back to france in march (not complaining im amazed ne did all that) and also for my bday last may ne got me the preorder of jacob gellers book which was meant to come out late 2024 but ended up pushed back to the first quarter of 2025. so basically around march im suddenly gonna get all nir gifts and its gonna be awesome..
#97#but i get to already be super excited about them which is cool..#i feel a bit name bc i only got nim 1 present from nim wishlist#and i alwayssss forget that ne likes to make several presents#so i feel like such a cheapskate#and unlike w ppl like. my dad. i dont have the excuse of 'i cant find good presents'#bc at least w nim ik what ne likes and wants#which is a lot easier than anyone else in my family or even friends#idk i never get used to 'you have to make multiple presents for each person'#bc for me xmas is mostly about kids so im only rly trying to get my little sister several things#i gotta step up my game..#i say this every year but i rly need to start marking down possible gifts earlier in the year#and then start buying them like. august or october to avoid running into money issues#i always want to do that but then i dont plan ahead enough#and this year w my surgery being in october i kinda had to scramble for gifts
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inside you there are two wolves: one gives a fuck, the other doesn't give a fuck
#sage's diary#006#10/30/2024#(incredible timing on my mom's part to start texting me for the first time in a month right as i was about to make one of these)#october has really been kicking my ass mental health-wise good fucking god#maybe i really DO have seasonal depression idk#this whole month's just been a rollercoaster of emotions and thoughts. its so exhausting#first it was the stressing about moving out soon. trying once again to get a job ontop of that (and failing of-fucking-course)#then all the dumb romantic feelings i was experiencing (and STILL struggling with)#and now im genuinely considering if i'd be happier if i was actually fully trans (or atleast just MORE masculine than i already sortof am??#when will i catch a fucking mental break man. my brain's already going 1mil mph a day anyways thanks to my ADHD i REALLY dont need more#uhghh whatever......... i have ace attorney to do soon i cant be worrying about this shit too much#save me talking to friends on discord...... save me....................
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I know I haven't done anything for Halloween, so here's a Quinn being cool for once lol
#thing i conjured#Quinn#I'm really proud of the lighting#I was going to start the inktober with OCs but we're like halfway through october already XD#the way my drawing program works#i cant start a drawing and then decide to begin anothet#i HAVE to finish the first one bc otherwise i wont have a way to start where i left off#so as soon as i finished one of the biggest drawings ive ever done i leapt on that blank canvas like a loaded spring#and MAN does it feel good to be back
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morning babies!! it's october! š
the year is going so fast I'm like š but I hope you guys enjoy this month. I'm planning to post the new blog event today for us to have some fun as well!
you all have a great day ahead!
#october it's already here#i feel like january was like five months ago#it's going too fast š#florist: rambles#take good care of yourselves!
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good news: we have water again ! ! ! a pipe had burst somewhere up the street so the city came out and fixed it today (we still need to run the tap to get rid of the air and muddy water but. it's something.)
bad news: i had to go to my partner's to do laundry and shower so i missed out on work time today (bad) (anxiety inducing) (i don't need this right now)
worst news: i have a killer headache and my throat is suspiciously stiff š š
#please please please for the love of god ; ; ;#i am begging and pleading do Not let this be a repeat of last semester ; ; ; ;#this is exactly how i felt last time i got sick with covid and i Cannot afford another late start ; ; ; ;#i am. suddenly stuck by The Unwelcome Guest last week cryptically asking me when you're supposed to test for covid#and then saying 'hmm. okay. good to know.' and then refusing to elaborate#i swear. to god if she got me sick i'm#i. can't even say. i'm suddenly struck by such helpless grief thinking about how little i can do to keep her from being in my life ; ; ; ;#we literally Evicted her she all but threatened my older sibling into letting her visit weekly to take care of her potted plants#and then in october last year she was like 'my roommate has covid and i don't have money for a hotel i have nowhere to go :'('#so the agreement was she could stay for One Week#and basically she has been. on and off our couch since then.#like. only going back to her apartment for 1 to 3 days at a time before spending another two weeks in our house.#with new excuses every time.#and literally Every Time I Say No And Put My Foot Down older sibling begs on her behalf because she's busy hounding and guilt-tripping them#so like. what can i even do if it turns out she infected me with covid because she didn't care to disclose that she was feeling sick#(and decided to come over anyway)#i'm just. overwhelmed ; ; ;#i feel like crying ; ; ;#i'm already busy pre-mourning the loss of my mental health and down time with my internship starting back next week#i don't need to worry about whether or not i'm going to be bed ridden for 2 weeks#and suffer Even More lasting lung and brain and blood and fatigue issues on top of that ; ; ; ;#a a a a a i just. feel like crying a lot ; ; ; ;#i'm already behind ; ; ;#i should ; ; ; try to work more tonight before the inevitability of it all hits me tomorrow ; ; ; ; ;
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Feeling very "droopy cartoon eyeballs after a character got blown tf up" on this wednesday.
#man.#I already hated Black Friday in commerce for a number of reasons#then Brazil also adopted it#then it started doing off-season Black Fridays which makes no sense#rather than just idk call it a sale#but then november rolls around and it's now Black November! the whole month#we work twice as hard for no extra pay for the whole month. oh and it doesn't stop there!#it actually starts at the end of october as pre-black friday or black friday warmup (depending on where you work)#and this year the chain I work at decided to do POST-BLACK FRIDAY so it lasts until early December#I feel like hot death. and the discounts aren't even good. 20% is not black friday sales level discount. that is kiddy shit#^^^ all of this while also having work done at our place. end of semester in college#and then I'm also navigating being scammed on top of all of this#I'm so so so tired#personal
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I was hanging up a Halloween garland to get a little more into the spirit of things, when I lost hold of the damn thing and it flung itself against my shelf.
The one with a vase on it. Which immediately got dragged down to the floor.
I could already hear the crash of glass... except it never came. There I am on my stepstool, looking at my scattered dried flowers, absolutely confused as to where the hell that vase went. I thought it had disappeared. Somehow. I was properly befuddled.
...It had fallen into one of my backpacks, which basically swallowed the whole thing up without looking like anything had happened. Thanks for making me think I was losing it dude. At least I didn't have to clean up any glass (ā Ā“ā -ā ļ¹ā -ā `ā ļ¼ā )
#I was looking everywhere lol#man it's been a little harder to blog these last few days I'll be honest#cause I bonked my head pretty hard and now I'm starting to fear I might be slightly concussed...#hard to tell cause all the symptoms are just stuff that's rather normal for me#it's just heightened right now#like thinking or walking without being all wobbly has been more difficult than it should be haha#I've just been feeling /weird/ I don't know how else to describe it#I'm just telling you this so y'all don't get confused if I'm acting off#I don't know I find it hard to tell#feeling better already thought so that's good#that lingering pressure in my head should go away soon it's lessened already#but have y'all been feeling particularly Halloweeny?#can't say I have unfortunately#october has been busy for me though so I saw that coming from a mile away#just a bit of a shame#spooky season#rƤtposting
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uh oh i'm getting this feeling that tells me i might not graduate this year and as soon as that's confirmed you have no idea how much i'm going to cry <3
#as if i wasn-t slow enough and procrastinated like my life depended on it... my thesis tutor is an asshole that took a month to read ch 1#to READ IT so who knows when he'll finish the corrections like these will be just the first ones of the first chapter#there's two more chapters left#and my uni requires that i'd be done with fucking everything by OCTOBER 5#that means submitting myt thesis AND defending and god knows how long that takes#like my prof technically just gave me good news but idk about about you guys#but i'm feeling like i might just kms instead <3#i'm staring at the calendar on my phone thinking we're not going to make it chief#oh i'm going to be sick#okay wait wait hold on i'm thinking not everything is lost like so what if i don't graduate this year i can still finish the thesis this ye#and then actually fucking rest and enjoy my life and plan what i'll do next while i wait for the next graduation!#but what about everyone in my life being intense about me graduating already??? well they'll make me cry but what else is new
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hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
#well it's that time of year i'm putting together the art year in review#only the thing i've been consciously working toward literally for a whole year#and i'm thinking thinking thinking#struggle zones include april (the two options being strel and sora)#(strel which i made my icon but is also like objectively bad)#(and sora which looks nice from far away but if you look close it's so messy)#(and i'm already having a different sad sora drawing in dark lighting for february. lol)#and october (the options being the gif- which like. do i really want to include a gif in a photoset cuz that's distracting)#(and that drawing of my keykid dalia which like. quite honestly is so messy and rushed)#(like i could have done so so much better it doesn't feel representative of my skill)#(or the strelitzia drawing but that one flopped. like it apparently did not look as good as i thought it did)#hhhhh yea.........#peach rambles
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