#but it feels like people are deliberately making me feel weird for wanting to make stuff for myself and not profit off my hobby
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
Maybe I did this to myself but it does irk me when people see me knitting and they ask who it’s for and I say it’s for me and the immediate reaction is “you should sell it” yeah… let me spend at least a week’s worth of my free time making an item I like, want, and would wear just to sell it on etsy, making at most a £2 profit on materials and not being compensated for my time whatsoever 👍🏻
#i say maybe i did this to myself because historically i have gifted most of the items i have knitted#because the venn diagram of things i like to knit vs things i like to wear is actually 2 circles that don’t touch#i looove making hats. i HATE wearing hats#also i love making baby clothes but i don’t have a baby and i’m not going to have a baby#however lately i’ve gotten really into knitting socks and i really like to wear knit socks. it’s like the most affordable way for me to get#quality wool socks. and i’m going to be watching my shows anyway. the time will pass anyways#but it feels like people are deliberately making me feel weird for wanting to make stuff for myself and not profit off my hobby#and like i’ve made 3 pairs of socks to gift already because ‘tis the season or whatever. and i’ve started another pair for a friend whose#birthday is in january#genuinely it’s very weird to hear ‘you should sell it’ or ‘oh i want one!!’ about an item i’m making for myself. after 18 years of gifting#or donating basically everything i’ve ever knitted. like i’ve gifted 2 double bed size crochet blankets#everyone i’ve known who’s had a baby has gotten a cardigan or a blanket or hats or all of the above#i spent october making poppies for the church. i’ve never even stepped foot in my village church mind you. my neighbour asked me to help#do you know what i own? that i’ve knitted? a pair of mittens and a pair of socks.#you want some socks from me? alright. that’s anywhere between £6 and £10 for the yarn and that’s optimistic#i’m currently making myself a pair with hand-dyed yarn that cost me £18 including delivery#the needles i use cost me more than £10. time… let’s call it 24 hours per sock#i don’t know anyone with 18 years experience who makes minimum wage so let’s call it an even 600 for my time. tbh#DO YOU SEE how this isn’t a viable side hussle??? i physically cannot charge what my socks are worth#if i like you and you’re willing to wait; socks are free or cost whatever the yarn costs#if i don’t like or know you venmo me £620. and you’re still going to have to wait.#just pisses me OFF when people suggest i make an etsy page and they say it like they’re doing me a favour or giving me great financial#advice. like you’ve seen me sitting here all evening and i’m barely done with the cuff.. do you actually think selling these for £20 maximum#is going to help me out. i’m not selling them. they’re FOR me. i’m making them because i want them#also when my friend’s family was saying this to me and i was like ‘well the yarn cost a fiver’ and they got quiet and i was thinking yeah…#a fiver is the maximum you cheapskates would pay isn’t it. a fiver is cheap sock yarn bought on sale. or yarn that probably isn’t actually#good for socks. like don’t presume to give me financial advice when you’re this out of touch with the market please#next person who asks when i’m going to start selling socks is getting this whole rant in entirety tbh i don’t care anymore#personal#edited to add that i didn’t even get into etsy fees or whether i would even be noticed among the mountain of dropshippers LOL
7 notes
·
View notes
Text
can argue to death with me about how age restrictions on youtube are necessary but i will be DAMNED before i say Hinds Hall deserved to be age restricted. average american child on youtube can listen to H*rbu D*rbu (censoring in hopes to avoid algorithm engagement with the song) which is IOF praising genocidal propaganda, and- big fucking shocker- its not age restricted. i’m 100% sure the only reason Hind’s Hall was restricted was to deliberately suppress and avoid the spread of the song.
#tauto talks#i know damn well that it doesn’t matter that it’s songs in different languages shit in arabic is not free from age restrictions just because#it would not take a kid much leg work for someone to find an english translation if they wanted it#pop culture has an inseparable impact on the public perception of so fucking much and it sucks to say but i bet some people hadn’t had#everything delivered in a way that made them care#macklemore has a weird history of social activism in his music i apologize every day for making fun of him in highschool for thrift shop#like his song kevin does a lot to tackle americas overprescription to addiction to jail or death pipeline#it is sympathetic to the experience of an addict in ways a lot of people generally in society are not#this song did a bit to turn perspective to industries at fault and not the individual suffering#so watching hinds hall be age restricted? feels deliberate. as every move of suppression has felt#feeling particularly full of grief and hate today because i graduate soon#i can only think of every writer like me who did not get to see the stage like i will and it aches#stories the world will never see because it removed the chance#it’s almost like the youth of america are some of the most vibrant and opinionated and energetic parts of the population. youth affords time#change spreading like wildfire cannot be put out as fast as it grows#keep burning#free palestine#palestine#gaza genocide#free gaza#eyes on rafah#eyes on sudan#eyes on congo#eyes on darfur#liberate the world#hoping a swift but painful death to colonization
18 notes
·
View notes
Text
Lineup of all of the characters that appear long enough to need a visual representation of them in the game lol
#I added a few people that you can randomly run into around town (like at the inn or in the forest or etc) and have very short conversations#with just to kind of flesh out the world a little more in a more natural-ish seeming way. Like nobody in the main cast would really#have much reason to talk about the actual city you're in or anything. Since most of them havent lived there that long anyway.#But if there's a ''city inspector'' that you can run into whilst he's writing up notes examining the local inn. then maybe there could be a#few dialogue options with him where you can ask about things like that. since he would know more about the area as an offical Government#Worker or etc. Optional of course. since I have to be so wary of my natural inclination to lore dump lol and am trying extra hard to make i#all stuff thats easily avoided/skipped. But for the people like ME who deliberately choose to exhaust every possible optional dialogue#option and explore every single inch of the world and try to collect as much information as possible - then there are a few extra places to#do that. Though obviously not all of them just give exposition for like 15 paragraphs blandly. Some you don't really learn anything from#and it's kind of just.. random flavor to make the non-shop map locations more ''lived in'' feeling. Like the random#little girl you can talk to in the park doesn't bizarrely start reading out the wikipedia description of some War that happened 10 years ag#or whatever. she's just complains about school a little and asks if you've tried the nearby ice cream cart treats and etc lol#ANYWAY..#some of the art is so so evil but I'm not going to spend 800 years trying to clean it up and update it. whatever the hell mess I sketched#out in 2018 or whatever is just what I'm keeping lol... it is what it is#One of the many trials of the whole 'briefly work a few months on something and then abandon it almost entirely only to pick up work#on it literally like 4 - 5 yrs later and now you must contend with trying to decipher whatever weird shit you did years ago' experience lol#Also given the population breakdowns of the world in general I think there's an unrealistic amount of jhevona in this lineup since#they're a much rarer species to just see out and about anywhere but.. it IS a global trading center type area. and the game#takes place in the north (the country of Asen. near the coast. for the maybe 2 or less people who actually keep up with my worldbuilding#enough to know where that is lol (the same continent as Navyete (where the avirre'thel live)) and there's a decent concentration#of nothern jhevona only a short ways away so... tee hee..I shall pretend it makes sense and not merely me just wanting#to represent more of that species because I think their lore is interesting lol#I MEAN also realistically there would NOT be a human here because humans are extremely isolated species that don't even know the rest#of the world exists really and human territories are extremely protected from the outside world but... of course it's like.. well we need#at least One of them to be there for the Optional Lore. Same with the Ythrili. But at least those are like.. PLAUSIBLE.. not nonsensically#outlandish. If I had a Verrucalt or something in there THEN that would be truly lore-breaking almost lol#ANYWAY.. rambling that only means anything to me because nobody else knows what I'm even referencing but hbjh#also I think my character designs are so funny in the sense that I really do just love to do the same thing over and over again ghbjh#wow... random asymmetry and belts and arm straps and high collars where the neck is completely covered?? you dont say..how novel
11 notes
·
View notes
Text
hey guys who was gonna tell me that bocchi the rock contained the single most autistic scene in anime history
#(and im saying this as a mob psycho 100 fan. btw)#i just binged the first 8 episodes and. wow#like admittedly i had seen a clip of her opening riff from that performance but the whole thing. holy shit#im at a loss for words#bocchi the rock!#btr#though i am a little.... unsure how to feel..... because. the scene calls deliberate attention to how she isnt looking at the crowd#and eye contact was a big thing she was 'working on' so i dont want it to be framed as 'wow she's so good if only she would look up'#but i havent watched past episode 8 so for now i live in a beautiful world where she was able to perform that way BECAUSE she didnt look up#and thats okay! shes allowed to not make eye contact even though its unconventional. its not a flaw - its what makes her unique#cause so much of this show is bocchi forcing herself to try to be more social or do things the 'right' way and im like nooooo.......#youre allowed to be a weird little introvert who cant make eye contact..... please stop trying so hard to be something else......#and like. 'its okay to be weird' is very straightforwardly the message of the show#im just worried it will pull its punches with the more socially unacceptable stuff yknow?#like it would still be fine. obviously people can get over a fear of eye contact. but it would make me a little sad.....#lol 'im at a loss for words'. says the guy who has never stopped yapping since he said his very first word#anyway. watch bocchi the rock 👍#biggie tumbles
8 notes
·
View notes
Text
Not only is my therapist hella supportive of my weird ass goal in therapy to learn shapeshifting (in whatever ways are feesable but especially in dreams) and is cool with all the negative thoughts being a monster comes with (daydreaming about hurting and eating people as a monster doesn’t make me a bad person), but they are roping in a literal shaman to help me out. That’s only part of the reason why, I’m also plagued with sleep hallucinations that are distressing (these are unaffected by my antipsychotics directly as it isn’t psychosis so I’m not gonna request med changes). That is probably the more pressing matter for them but I will be sure to tie it back to my desperate need to be a monster. I need to figure out how to satisfy this need for my mental wellbeing. I want it so bad I have literally offered my soul to entities I perceive as real and evil, hell I do it completely unprompted at times. The fact that I believe it is real and do potentially dangerous things is alarming to me when awake and have my wits about me. It’s essentially like I am drunk and wandering up to random people with a weird request. Some have gently told me they can’t do that, some are rude and tell me horrible things about me and why I don’t deserve to be happy.
Part of this is being billed to my insurance company, which is funny to me, do have to pay the shaman but my therapist is so cool they are not charging me for their time even though it is over the hour limit. They are helping me out because they care/worry about me and it is very nice to feel supported.
#I’m actually not the most spiritual person but am willing to do anything to feel correct#pretty much any attempt at woo leads back to wanting to be a monster#otherkin#monsterkin#therian#my psychiatrist knows I have weird dreams and hallucinations but has no clue what they are and how to treat that#I will let her know they have been increasing#she hurt my feelings by once saying I had a delusion so I’m not sharing anything further than that#it does not matter if I am delusional because a) I refuse to try any other antipsychotic#for fear of side effects#and b) if I’m delusional then believing in a cure hard enough will make it work#placebo effect or mind over matter or whatever#I literally do not care all I know is other people are successful at doing what I want to do#text post#wearing a fursuit helps actually but those are my characters not me#I’m not at a point where I can comfortably commission someone else to do it for me#I do not actually linger too much on the gore aspect#I’d like to I think I ought to really think of the implications of what I want to do#but also obviously I will not literally physically be a monster so don’t plan on hurting anyone#sometimes I look at gore deliberately and am like hmmm#what’s this suppose to be doing this ought to be titillating me#however simulated gore in movies and art is DEF my thing#love to see a monster brutalizing a person#but looking at a bear attack victim with the same injuries I’m like hmmmm ok#I want to tear people limb from limb and eat them#but looking at a real person eaten and torn limb from limb is like ehhh to me#hearing about videos or pictures of people INTENTIONALLY hurt and tortured upsets me can’t do that#I don’t want to hurt people in the people way#just a predator way#it’s not cannibalism fantasies btw not cannibalism if you are not human
5 notes
·
View notes
Text
every once in a while i remember that nobody in season 3, not even annie or MM, ever bothered to bring up the very valid point that maybe the boys shouldn't be hunting and killing supes who haven't actually done anything wrong (at least to their knowledge), and i am filled with rage all over again
#when annie and mm at herogasm were like. 'u cant blow up the house! theres human s*x workers there!'#i THINK ur forgetting some people idk....#unless they had proof that each of these supes was a deplorable murderer i am not interested in hearing excuses#like did the tnt twins even do anything other than enjoy weird s*x parties?#and weirdly hughie's conscience kicked in for mindstorm but not the herogasm supes who were. as far as he knew. just as innocent#i guess atp ever non-7 supe is written like a cartoon villain and mindstorm was only needed to wake billy so y would the audience even care#also only used the * because i know the tumblr tags are funky and hide posts#the boys#also like idk. maybe all of s3 was a pov trap and later audiences will recognize the gruesome reality of what they were cheering for#and btw some of you WERE cheering like weirdos#'to stop the unstable supervillain they should work with the other unstable supervillain! the second of whom is actively blowing ppl up!' 🤨📸#and i STILL think annie's resistance was dumb because they tied it around toxic masculinity for hughie 'benchpress me' campbell#and annie failed to bring up the much more devastating impacts of what he and butcher were doing#it's just as much as i want to think this is deliberate on the writers' part. why WOULDN'T they have their moral beacon raise#the most pressing issue at hand? not her being undermined or working with someone bad but lives being lost? idk.#especially considering annie's arc is not one of corruption or even overcoming corruption. she's just the total good guy#point is it just makes me worry for what's next#(also me complaining abt the boys s3... it feels like old times <3)
26 notes
·
View notes
Text
.
#tag talk#told my brother about how I trimmed my sublingual frenulum and he explained to me how apparently I'm a 12 on the weird scale#he was like “at least it wasn't the dick one” and I had to tell him that yeah I already got that one like.. two years ago.#I think I'm now a 13 on the weird scale in his eyes#idk. it's always an isolating experience to meet people who are like “yeah I'm so weird I'm a freak!” and then I start talking and they just#the slow horror creeps across their face and suddenly I'm the freak again.#and here's the thing. yeah it's mixed up in mental instability but it's rooted in a genuine view that my body is just an object#I feel better than I've ever felt and I've been thinking about how I don't like that part of my body. so I changed it. simple as that.#it's not self harm it's self actualization. I'm creating something.#this is my gripe with mental health professionals. they view it as pathology. view it as a problem.#was me piercing my ears an act of self harm? I would say no. but deliberately sticking a needle into your body could be extrapolated as such#idk. just because I'm not like everyone else doesn't make me a freak. doesn't make me bad. doesn't make me abhorrent.#I like the fact that I'm becoming more confident in my weirdness. owning it. if anyone doesn't like it they can leave. I am who I am.#I still want some sort of wing design across my back and shoulder blades but I think I'll actually have to get that done professionally.#some day. not soon for sure. but eventually#my back is relatively bare compared to my front since my arm reach is limited so you know.#but like. a dragon wing design kinda like the red dragon Hannibal-style#wouldn't that absolutely fuck severely?#I think it would#I don't want more far out body mods like split tongue or piercings on less practical body parts#though actually ngl after bottom surgery I would actually totally get some sort of labial piercing maybe.#that would actually be sick as hell I think.#zero desire to pierce my dick cause I don't want it at all so the less attention it gets the better#anyway. done rambling for now.
1 note
·
View note
Text
i really like mole because it's like. it's about a lot of things. but one of the biggest parts to me is the paranoia . like. "i know what you want and you know what i want" is already so incredibly damning bc that's not how human interaction works so at least one of these parties is making assumptions. and then just following that line up with "information, information". again its the assumption bc neither party is saying with any clarity what the information is so they could be communicating on totally different wavelengths but there's still just that unspoken level of assumption. you know what i want. i know what you want. we don't need to specify at all. you know. i know.
#sorry im like. hghghhghj. march makes me weird#im also. god. i feel bad because i cannot be normal about this#no longer talking abt the goats btw feel free to ignore if youre not invested in my personal life#but ive figured out whats setting me off and its so strange#bc i thought i got over it. this is a thing of the past. literally nearly a decade ago by this point#there is not a single me that remembers it and those that do are seeing someone else's warped vision of it#but it's. a thing. and it's messing me up. and i can't stop it and it frustrates me#i tried to ask my brain to stop it and they explicitly told me 'you don't get to make that request'.#and like. on monday i thought they were deliberating about what to do but it seems like theyre not or if they are they just wont tell me#and its. sucks. cause i dont like being excluded from conversations in the first place#and then theres people talking about things that im not present for which is a large part of what is freaking me out#(i say large part. i mean a small part interwoven w the rest but i don't know for sure bc i literally don't know)#but theyre just. im not. nobody is telling me anything. and im all alone and im getting paranoid about it. so hence the moleposting#its just frustrating cause some parts are avoidable and others arent#like shes always going to know things we dont know bc thats the basic idea of it#but she doesnt have to lie. about it. and misleading.#i dont want to confront her but i get the feeling that at some point i will not be given a choice which is unfortunate#considering that's likely to be big and loud and public#and i dont like that theyre collaborating without telling us. when the informed consent is sus. but thats gonna stop soon#they said its gonna stop soon and i have no choice but to believe them bc i cant. do anything. if theyre lying#i will say i cant like. speak for all parts but some of them have been sliding me notes under the table so to speak and theyre on my side#so that's something#but i really don't wanna have to explain anything. especially not publicly especially not to her etc etc#aand im getting the headache again so that is a sign to stop. goobaba all i hope tomorrow will be better#post
5 notes
·
View notes
Text
There’s something I love love loveeee about Laios and how badly he wants to be cool.
Let me preface with this: in general, I believe the harder you try to be cool, the less cool you actually are. The less you care what people think about you, if you’re “cringe” or “weird”, the more likely people will perceive you as confident and self-assured.
There are countless pieces of media where characters try to fit in with some group, change every part of themself to look/act like what they’re “supposed” to be, and end up miserable, often realizing the people they’re trying to impress aren’t worth the trouble.
I’ve experienced this in my own life too! Sometimes when I go out I wear a rainbow propeller cap! Cause I think it’s funny and silly and!! I ALWAYS get compliments!! I don’t wear it to be cool, I wear it because it makes me happy. And people overall have a positive reaction to it. it’s a huge contrast to when I was teenager and didn’t really put as much of myself into my appearance/wardrobe, and barely left any kind of impression on people.
So anyway, let’s get into it.
Laios… he’s been hurt so badly by people. He resented humanity for it. And yet, he still yearns for the approval of others. He wants FRIENDS!!!! and was angry and frustrated to learn his perception of his relationship with Shuro was so drastically different than Shuro’s!!!!
He KNEW that people were put-off by his love of monsters. Up until Falin got eaten, he deliberately suppressed how much he talked about it with others. He probably thought by not talking about monsters so much, it was working!! He was doing all the Right Things now! So Shuro confessing he always hated him was a huge blow.
But the reality is, he loves monsters. And most importantly, he loves cool monsters. He fantasizes about what would make the Ultimate Monster.
He feels very strongly about what he considers “cool” as well. He finds all aspects of monsters fascinating, but can still be HORRIBLY underwhelmed when they look too lame for his tastes.
He knows most people don’t feel the same way he does. He knows his “cool” is everyone else’s “weird”. It’s so tragically sweet how he latches onto Kabru the moment he shows interest in monsters, and takes every opportunity to infodump about them to him.
He wants people to find monsters as cool as he does!! But, he also wants people to think he’s as cool as he finds monsters.
Like!!! djkfghadkfjg IT DOESN'T EVEN BOTHER HIM WHEN PEOPLE HAVE A WRONG IMPRESSION OF HIM! He's FLATTERED by it. It's almost like, at this point, it doesn't matter to him if people don't like him. People can not like him and still think he's cool.
And my favorite thing is, it works. Laios IS cool as fuck. You KNOW he thought he looked so badass when he did this and he was RIGHT:
And yet, this is him trying very hard to look cool. But it's Laios's version of cool. It's almost contradictory, in that sense. Cause he knows people still don't get it. Like. He wants to be cool. He doesn't care about the "normal" ways to be cool. He thinks his cringe thing is cool. He does his cringe thing, that people very much do still think is cringe. So you would think that, since he wants people to think he's cool, he would not do the cringe thing. But he wore the pelt because he thought it was cool. And people clapped and cheered for him anyway.
is what he's doing really so different than this? ^
YAYYYYY WOOO GO LAIOS YOURE SO COOL!!!!!!!
#dungeon meshi#dungeon meshi spoilers#long post#photos#laios touden#I LIKE HIM A LOT!!!!!! HES SUCH A GOOD CHARACTER!!!!!
4K notes
·
View notes
Text
With hindsight, I probably should have realized I was polyamorous/ambiamorous sooner than I did. (And to be clear, I realized it pretty young. I just didn't have the terminology for it.)
Ignoring the fact that five-year-old me used to watch Signing In The Rain! on a loop and was already making up stories about Don, Cosmo, and Kathy all living together in Don's big house and *gasp* holding hands (maybe kissing), I was never any good at shipwars.
Like someone would ask me, "What's your OTP?" and I'd be like, "Well, I guess I like X/Y, but also Y/Z is good too..."
And they'd be like, "No. I mean your one TRUE pairing," and I'd just blink at them like, I'm sorry, I don't understand the question.
I'm sure they thought I was trying to stir shit or being deliberately annoying, but I just... couldn't wrap my head around it. Why did I need to pick one thing? There were multiple options with different things that made them appealing. That's like going to an all-you-can-eat buffet and just drinking water. Which is fine! If water is all you want, great. But you don't get to go to an all-you-can-eat buffet and judge people for eating different foods...
And when I eventually found out multi-shipping was a thing, I was like, "oh neat, that's what I do!" and while there was a definite feeling of having found my people, it was weird having the moral judgment from other people who seemed to think multi-shipping was a symptom of a greater moral character flaw. Like my inability to settle on just one thing meant I was more likely to cheat irl.
This wasn't helped by the fact that I... kinda already didn't care about monogamy? Not the way my friends did. I didn't mind that my then-boyfriend liked Sarah, too. What I minded was that he went behind my back and kissed her when he'd told me I couldn't kiss anyone else.
It was the betrayal of the agreement that hurt. Because we'd agreed. He'd asked me to be exclusive with him, and I did. And then he... didn't. And my friends couldn't grasp that.
It was all, "How could he kiss someone else?!" and my chief complaint was, "Why didn't he tell me first?!"
Anyway, if I could go back in time, I'd tell teenage me, you're not weird and amoral, you're just queer, polyamorous, and have ADHD, lmao.
6K notes
·
View notes
Text
Leaving VII
Alexia Putellas x Teen!Reader
Summary: Olympic chaos with your sister
Y/NPutellas.S has started a live video. Click to join!
"-Got two backpacks," You're saying as Alexia clicks on your video," I think one of them might become my racket bag because the one I'm using right now is falling apart."
You shove the bags away, glancing around the space as you drag more towards you.
"There's a toiletry bag as well which is full of stuff I probably won't even use."
You pause as you scroll through the comments.
"What sport am I competing in? Oh, I'm doing tennis...Who will be the hardest to play against? Iga, always. I train with her most of the time and I think I've only beaten her a few matches this year. She's scary. Coco always gives me a good competition too. I think she text me a few hours ago but I haven't answered just yet."
You go back to showing off your haul.
You're very complimentary of all of the shoes but you seem confused as to why you've been given so many socks.
Alexia takes a screenshot of a weird face you make while trying on the bucket hat and hastily makes it her profile picture.
"I'm not a fan of the opening skirt," You tell your followers," It's not really my style. I'll wear it because I have to but...What's that? My sister's here?"
You crowd a bit closer to your phone, brows furrowed as you scroll up looking for Alexia's comments.
She feels triumphant at the look of horror on your face when you see her profile picture.
"Alexia!" You shriek," Change it back! My eyes aren't even open! Ale, please!"
Alexia does not change it back and you swear under your breath at her.
"I'm telling Mama!"
Alexia Putellas: Go ahead, you little snitch
"I'm not a snitch!"
Alexia Putellas: Yes, you are
"Don't listen to her guys! She's such a liar!"
You've always been more active on social media than Alexia and fans eat up any content you post on your TikTok. Most of your fans are just people that watch tennis but you've gone viral overnight when you posted a video of you and Iga reuniting at the Olympic Village.
Suddenly, everyone wants content from you and you're posting more than you ever have before.
A lot of it still centres around your tennis, out on the practice courts with the rest of team Spain but there's more domestic things like you retaping your racket grip and showing off everything in the Olympic Village.
Something in Alexia snaps when you make a video complaining about how uncomfortable your cardboard bed is. Suddenly, she's stitching your video.
Her camera pans across her normal hotel bed and ends with her giving a thumbs up to the camera with a smug grin on her face.
Her own fans go crazy over her posting something outside of sponsorships and it's strange to see that some people don't even know who you are.
woso.alexia.engen: Who was the first person in the video???? -> captainklittle: Alexia's little sister! She's representing Spain for tennis!
A second stitch appears hours later, piggybacking off a video of you complaining about your lack of AC. There's no sound apart from the very deliberate flick of Alexia's own AC switch.
It seems every complaint you post, Alexia finds a way to show off how much better she has it in a hotel outside of Paris.
You decide, perhaps a little pettily, to show off what she's missing.
"Hi, guys!" You say," I know a lot of people were wondering about pin trading so I thought I would bring you along for the ride! I've already got a Poland one from Iga and a US one from Coco but I've been wanting a Team GB one and I'm also meeting up with Paolini so she can give me an Italy one."
It's another live video and thank god there's a break in training, so Alexia can jump onto it again.
Jenni and Misa crowd around her at the same time, curious as to what's going on with you.
"I was talking to Carlos at breakfast and he was telling me that the coaches have ordered us all mattress toppers because the beds have started to affect how we're performing."
Alexia Putellas: Sucks to be you, doesn't it?
"Alexia, I swear to god if you keep bullying me then I'm telling Mama and she'll fly out to whoop your ass!"
Alexia Putellas: 🤪
"And Jenni I knew that it's you that just sent that because Alexia doesn't understand emojis."
"Fuck," Jenni mutters.
"Wait, give me the phone. I'll fix it," Misa says.
Alexia Putellas: Who's Jenni?
"Misa, I know that's you as well. Stop trying to cover for each other and I'll tell Mama and she'll whoop all of you."
Alexia doesn't get her phone back for the rest of your live but she does get a strongly worded text from Eli after it's over to grow up and not let her friends bully you.
Alexia calls you a snitch.
You remind her that she should stop bullying you.
"Look who it is!" Jenni cajoles as you come running out of the village to crash into Alexia," Baby Putellas!"
But you're not really listening to her as Alexia presses her forehead against yours, whispering fast Catalan to you as you giggle.
"Aw..." Misa continues where Jenni left off," Look at them! Two sisters! Reunited!"
You and Alexia push each other away, turning your back and pretending that you weren't hugging just a few moments ago.
You turn back to her quickly, hand out. "Can I have your pins?"
"What? No! They're mine!"
"You're not even in the Village! You can't use them!"
"Yes I can!" Alexia splutters out," I've been trading them!"
"Yeah? With who?"
"Jenni!"
"Liar! You've got the same pins! Come on, Ale. Give them over!"
"I will...for a price."
As Alexia lays out her terms, you bring everyone up to your room.
Jenni and Misa split off briefly to check out the dining hall but Alexia comes straight up with you.
"It's actually cardboard," She says, poking at your bed frame.
"Yeah? Do you think we were all lying about that? It's proper cardboard. You can draw on it if you want."
A smile splits your sister's face open.
"Never mind. I don't want you drawing on my bed."
Alexia pokes it. "Do you think it's true? That two people can't get on it at the same time?"
You shrug, rummaging through your bedside table. "I don't know. Why?"
You never get your answer though.
Arms are around your waist suddenly and you're being hauled backwards as Alexia slams herself onto your bed, dragging you back with her.
You may not get an answer but Alexia certainly does because the moment the two of you land, there's an almighty ripping noise and your bed goes to ground very quickly.
"Oops," You sister says.
"Alexia!"
"Sorry?"
"You don't sound very sorry at all."
"Yeah...You're right. I'm not sorry in the slightest. Hey! Stop hitting me!"
"You're lucky I'm not beating you with my rackets!"
"Hey. Hey! It's fine! You can get a new bed."
"Jenni and Misa are going to take the piss out of me! How could you do this, Ale?"
As annoying as your sister is, she at least has the decency to push the blame off onto her friends as you both hastily raise your bed up again and wait for Jenni and Misa to arrive.
They seem to have the same idea as Alexia, jumping onto your bed without so much of a greeting.
But, as planned, the bed collapses under them and the shock of their faces is enough for Alexia breaking your bed to be worth it. Their faces are even funnier as they head downstairs to ask for a new one for you.
Behind your back, Alexia passes you a handful of pins.
JenniHermoso10 has started a live video. Click to join!
"Forward! Forward!"
"I am going forward!"
"More forward! When I say forward, it doesn't mean shuffle! It means walk forward! You're a person not a pigeon!"
"And here we have Olympic football player Alexia Putellas and Olympic tennis player y/n Putellas, attempting to climb onto the rings," Jenni narrates from behind the camera.
"It's not going well," Misa says, as Alexia nearly throws you from your spot on her shoulders," Alexia is clearly struggling."
"I'm not struggling!" Alexia insists, yelping as you twist her hair in your hands.
"Forward!
"This is as forward as I can get!"
"That's such bullshit! Move closer!"
"I can't!"
"You can!"
"I don't think they're ever going to make it," Jenni says," It's like they can't-"
"Stop! Ale, stop! Left a bit. No! Too left. Right again. Left! Right! Left!"
"Left, right, forward, back," Alexia mutters," Make up your mind."
"Left and...got it...Wait! Don't let go!"
You haul yourself from your sister's shoulders onto the centre ring, positioning yourself perched on the sliver of the yellow ring that enters the black one.
"Alright," Alexia says," Give me a hand."
"What? No! You'll pull me off!"
"Give me your hand!"
"No!"
"Yes!"
"No!"
She braces herself on the lower rings and grabs your hand, pulling herself into the centre ring before you can even shove her off.
"Oh," She says," That was pretty easy." Alexia grins at you but the smile drops from her face when she notices the pensive look you're wearing. "What is it?"
"I've just realised," You laugh in disbelief," When Mama said she wanted a picture of us and the rings. I think she meant in front of them. Not in them."
"Oh."
#woso x reader#alexia putellas x reader#alexia putellas#woso community#woso imagine#woso fanfics#woso
835 notes
·
View notes
Note
i was talking to a friend who's a trans woman about this. she used to be really weird about butch trans women, but ended up being butch herself. she told me she was adverse to it because "it was like watching someone leave their house completely naked. you feel maybe a little embarrassed for them but you're mostly scared for how other people are going to treat them too. [she] thought "well, [she'd] be embarrassed doing the same and maybe they were having a hard time passing. but then finding out they're doing it on purpose, [she] thought that they were making a joke of being trans, like they were enforcing the stereotype of just saying you were a woman despite not making any effort to look like one. [she] was confused as to why anyone would do that, especially when she'd been having a hard time being treated well even though she did everything to make herself like a cis girl." she hated having to put in so much effort into looking feminine but did it because she was sure that's just what you had to do. obviously, probably regardless of how she looked, she was going to be treated like shit on the principal of being trans and after actually talking to butches and thinking about it more, she decided to just dress how she felt comfortable and still be proud of being a woman.
That's very interesting to hear. That is the consistent impression I've gotten from well meaning trans women.
I had to wrestle with the whole, "declaring myself a woman without making the effort," thing. When I first transitioned I put on dresses, tried on makeup, and got cute jackets. None of it felt right. I knew, entirely, that I was a woman. But doing all of the things women were supposed to be doing made me feel even worse than when I had lived as a man, which is saying something.
I eventually figured out that there is plenty of effort to being a butch woman. There are still styles, there are still pieces of gendered clothing, there are still gendered actions, they're just hidden in plain sight. They're all the things I wanted to do and all the ways that I wanted to be perceived that I couldn't understand until someone (Leslie Feinberg) held a mirror to my face (SBB) and said Butch. Then it all clicked.
I've been doing HRT for three full years now. I've been socially transitioned for three full years now. It is work. It is a challenge. It is walking out of the house with nothing but your soul and what you choose to armor it with. For some women the armor is a dress and a full face of makeup. For me its leather and boots.
I love my sisters deeply. I love women deeply. I love womanhood deeply. But my womanhood is also deliberately not womanhood. My selfish desire is a world where I can be exactly who I am without having to justify it to every woman, trans or cis, that crosses my path. But that's not gonna happen any time soon.
As so many butches, cis and trans, have said, It is a difficult road to walk and I have no choice but to walk it.
1K notes
·
View notes
Text
KINKVEMBER DAY: 9
[prompt: problematic relationships]
male reader x nana
10k words
"Do you have any idea how long I've thought about it?" Nana slips a finger between the buttons of your shirt. "You, me - us?"
And here, you actually, truthfully do not want to know.
So, go ahead, cue up the sound of a mental rolodex spinning out while you start to list the very real, very valid, very adult reasons you should never, ever put your hands on her. (1) She's too young for you, (2) you're kind of a community figure, or at least someone who has to appear to be one, and more pertinently (3) she was your student not long enough ago - in your ethics class, the irony of which is not lost on you - and that makes it the kind of dirty, low thing you'd feel guilty for even masturbating to. Let alone actually attempt to live through, no matter how insistent some parts of you might be to the contrary, a point emphasized by the pressure of her finger against the dip just below your sternum.
"These... oh, how should I call them." Nana hums softly just before easing a bit of distance between the two of you, head tilting like she's in a trailer for this summer's romcom, and not, you know, trying to drag you into hell. "Filthy little fantasies?"
-
You're a high school teacher, interdisciplinary. Sometimes history, other times philosophy, you've also taught math - and once, egregiously, home economics when the faculty member whose usual duties consisted of teaching the class was out on a very sudden and scandalous maternity leave. But it's your love of literature that finds you in a bookstore near enough to the high school to sell more used copies of intro textbooks than actual novels.
You're paging through a book you'd say you're considering buying - if any of the store staff were to push the question onto you - when she appears at the other end of the fiction aisle.
You catch the look first of her dyed hair, this perfect shade of chocolate, to the edges, the fade-to-brown, cascading over where a more formal shirt would ostensibly have shoulders.
She smiles; it's pretty.
Then, you make the mistake of glancing down and seeing the modest rise of her chest beneath a crisp-collared sleeveless top; all your typical college-age tells but for the red flannel, rolled back down around her waist. Her fingers, long and thin, dangle from where a uniform button-down would taper off around her wrist, thumb rubbing lazily at her forearm. The briefest glimpse of her nails, all done up in acrylic - perhaps the most potent way to show contempt for an old dress-code.
You have, admittedly, also noticed the length (appropriately, the lack thereof) of her pleated skirt and those frilly stockings that ride so far up the creamy curves of her thighs that it has your stomach rolling and tightening when she shuts closed the book in her hands and says -
"Isn't it weird how most of the novels in the romance section are written by women?”
- she speaks with a slow deliberateness, like she'd only ever hoped to find one of her old teachers alone and slightly vulnerable in a used bookstore -
“Like, how do you think a man would even go about writing those kinds of stories?" She grins, because maybe this isn't really a question at all - not one meant for you, certainly. And for one wild moment, the rush of relief (she's not actually talking to you), then panic (she's actually talking to you.) surges through you.
But then the girl pushes another couple books along the shelf and continues.
"Because I'll tell you what, Professor - all this stuff," a flip-flip-flip of her fingertips against a leathery dustjacket, "about just feeling it, not being able to control it. It's all women, always women." Another wave of her hand to set another row of spines a-shuddering. "Do you ever think maybe people will get tired of listening to girls talking about feelings when what they really need to see is what guys would do?"
There are so many reasons you should turn and run.
So many little flags, flickering wildly in your mind. This is one of your students. Was it this fall? Maybe the last; she had sat front-center. Never slept in, was one of your best by several measures - not simply in regards to the simple repetition of classroom work, but by her insistence on getting in the kind of heated discussion where one might dig their fingers through the innards of your lectures. Not just good - fantastic.
"Nayeon," you end up saying, flat as your suddenly paper-dry mouth can make it - with just the tiniest hint of unease. "It's been a while, hasn't it?"
And almost as if she knows that you're trying not to let your eyes dip any lower than the collar of her shirt, her shoulders do that lilting little move (hiking up and away just so), the one that your girls tend to learn a long, long time before your boys ever manage to figure out. She laughs out this pleasant sound, adds: "not that long, sir."
"Well," you're clearing your throat, looking around the bookstore like it might contain a way out, and eventually landing somewhere on her skirt, "you know how fast it all goes."
"Nana, by the way."
“I’m sorry?”
“Nana,” She gently corrects you again with this mischievous slant to her smile, and you start remembering: all the gossip and rumors, how she was being courted by these talent-scouts and labels. A prodigy, or as close to it as anyone from this town could ever get.
Your eyes are starting to sting again when she, this perfect-fit model of your worst impulses, runs her hand through her hair, tugging at the roots a little bit, a silver wristwatch falling slightly down the perfect length of her forearm. It almost hurts not to reach out and steady her. And it definitely shouldn't, but it has you breathing a bit faster. The rationalization: you are a man, and there is a perfectly ordinary part of you that might be aroused by any amount of smooth, inviting skin. That's fine. You're fine.
"Just for the record," Nana starts, still looking like she wants to put a hand forward and hook one long fingernail into the buttons of your shirt. "You were, like, absolutely one of my favorite teachers."
"I guess it's nice to hear I'm not a complete lost cause," you say.
She snorts. "Oh, definitely not." And maybe because, after all of the years you have been teaching these soon-to-be lawyers, politicians, and doctors, you've come to not look down on them for saying the wrong things so much. Though you do envy their absolute ability to say the wrongest of things - just so - just on purpose.
"Are you," you nod at the thick stack of paperback novels that she is still holding, and with which, suddenly, she's bashful and flustered - this perfect shade of pink blossoming through her cheeks. "Actually here to buy those?"
The response: a demure little shrug. A drawl. "We all have our vices, professor."
"I'm not your teacher anymore," and remembering at the last moment, "Nana, you can drop the honorifics, please."
She holds a book out, cover turned toward you, and your mind stalls - even your fingers slip a little where they are resting on the spine of your own paperback purchase. The title is an affront to literacy, and the art on the cover seems to have been produced only with stock photos, gaudy.
"Have you heard of it?"
"Can't say that I have."
"Well," she laughs and has the courtesy not to lay it at your expense, "it is so good." Then, without missing a beat, she twists her lips together, and finds the book flush against your chest. "I'm sure it beats reading textbooks and essays about the merits of Locke and Hobbes' life-after-death stuff all day, anyway. An hour if you can spare the time? I'd love to hear your thoughts on it"
And - ah, there it is. The push.
-
There is a zero percent chance that, after any of this, things will end neatly for either of you.
You still wonder, slightly, how long Nana will keep up the charade before breaking character - because there's no way in hell she doesn't see what she's doing: wrapping you around her pretty fingers, her shiny, manicured nails, twisting every chance you get to reject her into an excuse to linger that little bit longer.
But it's well over an hour spent at the cafe-end of the bookstore, where she orders an iced-coffee and fills you in on the details you don't really need to hear, what she's been up to these last couple semesters - playing twenty questions; questions about other faculty members, the school, if the school newspaper is still anything like it used to be (for the record: no), then coming back to if you've been seeing anyone lately. That last one slips in so naturally you can't stop yourself from taking a slow drag off of the straw in your drink and answering: "not recently."
Because no honest deed goes unpunished, or however the saying goes.
"Hey," her hands splay out over the tabletop, pushing the cold, condensing water of her glass, smudging where a finger drags a line through the pool.
Maybe she knows. How you're already caught, and there's no going back, which is to say you're perfectly free to watch, hungrily, where her throat moves, and then where her lips part.
"I’ve got the perfect thing for that," and for one unhinged, hysterical moment you picture it, Nana: lying back against a counter or maybe in the cushions of a sofa, panties thrown carelessly over her shoulder; heaving out this soft, heady gasp. You: pushing inside of her for the very first time, both of your legs bracing, the heel of her foot pressed into the small of your back - but before you can convince yourself that she can't be talking about that, and just barely before the air gets stuck in the back of your throat and you realize that you might be so thoroughly, tragically fucked -
"Read this." A snap back into the here and now. She is looking at you very pointedly, not naked - but beautiful and perfect as she leans a bit into the table and crosses those lovely, lovely legs of hers, and tilts the copy of that awful, awful filth at you.
"Nana, respectfully, this is drivel," you say, immediately and plainly, listening to Nana laugh out loud as you glean more than you need to know from the info on the inside cover. "They've crossed like five major genre boundaries for a hook-up. Why should anyone bother?"
"Come on." She waves it off with a careless gesture of her hands. "There's plenty of things to like. Maybe you should give it a chance - broaden your horizons, teach. Besides - the sex scenes?" She rolls her shoulders with the same shrug you remember watching so carefully all those times she made her way, out of the hallways and back into that front-and-center-seat she was always occupying whenever the bell rang. "So filthy. I can show you one of my favorites."
"Doesn't really seem like appropriate reading material for -"
"You said it yourself," her voice has a bright, saccharine tone, just on the right side of strained. And between sips of that straw stuck in the purse of her pert, little mouth, she draws that next sentence - the ice cracking, thinning under your feet -
"Not my teacher anymore."
Nana smiles; this brash, cock-sure thing that reminds you, as you try to clear your throat of the nerves making a bed there: you are actually so, so fucking gone on her. So far gone it hurts, when, with a flourish and a bounce and a complete, reckless lack of discretion, she starts paging through the first chapters.
"Who says you can't study these kinds of stories on an academic level? Think about it: sex sells. Whoever ends up writing, it's a whole lot easier and a hell of a lot cheaper than trying to do it all yourself." She looks up, this mischievous twinkle in her eyes, as she angles her fingertips down on the book and opens it - page after page of very obviously poorly-written sex. You look, not even consciously.
But of course, her fingertips drift lower and lower along the pages until it's evident: she doesn't have an exact page in mind, but only a particular passage -
"Here. Let me show you, just one."
"Alright, fine," you start - trying for an effect of exasperation, something to mitigate this god awful throbbing, "whatever - you get one, one sample paragraph and I'll, you know, whatever."
"Yeah, you'll definitely see. Just trust me. Just the one."
She drums her long, gorgeous nails against the table, then eases back with a finger highlighting the text.
You're screening and scanning the words as she tells you about the heroine in the story: a pretty girl who comes down with a bad case of infatuation for her teacher - unrequited, of course. And then, into a passionate affair, of course; all the most raucous, explicit details laid out over the table for everyone else to hear. She says it is about as nonchalantly as though she had been reading you the daily weather forecast and not an elaborate metaphor for - and here, you stop her.
"He cums on her desk?"
"Fucking hot, right?" She nearly snorts and gestures you onward, her eyebrows jumping - go on, go on.
So, you skim along: a heavy rush of nausea (alongside another) pulsing down around your gut at the thought of actually doing such a thing, your ears going hot and your legs crossing on instinct. There's not so much a breath of hesitation as Nana, cool, unfazed, and utterly unaware of the uncomfortable churning of your stomach and the simultaneous thrumming in your cock, takes another deep swig of coffee.
She hums, thoughtful. "Honestly? Kinda wished it happened to me like that. You were a good, good teacher, professor. I wouldn't have minded your hands all over me." You hear her laugh, and the entire universe collapses like the end-days. You are struck down with feverish conviction: this girl is the worst.
"Anytime you wanted," she adds, so carelessly.
There's a clunking sound, of glass on wood; a half a second where you almost lose control over yourself.
“Nayeon,” you let slip, the old name - a mistake of an invitation she grasps like a weapon. All coming to a glint in her eye that says she knows how you see it, how you can still picture her sitting with her hands folded over the skirt of her uniform, chest rising and falling beneath her cotton shirt. Studious, taking notes, acting every bit the naive sweetheart everyone believed her to be.
You shudder out some pretense of composure and settle back a few inches as she continues to coax a reaction out of you, prodding: "how many girls did you make confess back then, hm? Did it ever do them any good?"
"Dial it back, Nana."
Her expression is all feigned, gentle surprise. "But sir," she looks at you so innocently, "you said I should drop the honorific."
You want to argue that, you also want to tell her off for being such a brat - to demand that, instead, she cut the shit, sit back, and remember who you both are, but when, with a wink and a smirk, she's getting up out of her seat, Nana sets a gentle, reassuring hand on your shoulder as she pushes her chair back beneath the table. You get onto your feet, and when the two of you are stood close together like this - she's really and truly that much smaller than you remember. Waist so tiny you think you could almost, almost wrap two hands all the way around her; skirt rising all too easily when she tosses her weight between her heels.
"I hope you know what you’re doing," you tell her, sternly - the voice of a teacher whose patience is running thin.
But no matter where you look, the consequences are dire and immediate: an abject fascination, a kind of debilitating greed; the absolute fucking loss of ability to look her directly in her eyes. Not like Nana isn't staring right through you. There's no doubt some part of her relishes the feeling.
"Hey, what do I know?" This sweet, demure-like chuckle follows. "It's just porn, right?”
-
Eventually, Nana says to call it a night because the sun's long set into the horizon and the chill starts getting at the both of you.
She tells you while you're packing up your belongings to come by again sometime, her voice teasing as she explains that you should pick out a new novel to read for your benefit.
Which is possibly the ideal outcome, all things considered, if it wasn't for the way she found herself in your hands just a few paces into the parking lot - no one around to catch you, where you're gripping fast onto her wrist and pressing the lines of her body into door of your car, looming and ready to give a piece of your mind.
You know what you ought to say - things like don't bother, you've enjoyed her company, she's fun and sweet, and in a dozen different ways: be a good girl, and go home. You had your fun, didn't you? But she's practically begging, those huge, wide doe eyes that stare straight up into your soul.
"C'mon,” her voice lilts into a deeper, more purposeful register, “you wouldn't turn down a student on her way home, would you?
(This fucking girl.)
She speaks of propriety, like you aren't a man of your own principles - like you aren't reaching down to press a kiss to the swell of her lips like she undoubtedly deserves. To lick into her mouth and pull and kiss and bite until she's trembling, teeth caught in a delicate whimper. Or, that you aren't running your hands down her sides to find the backs of her knees and draw them upward, hooking your hips flush against hers.
She's all too breathless, watching you draw off her lips, fingers fast in your shirt, your hair - holding you close.
Then finally, a true, honest reflection of your heart. Nothing less than sheer and utter capitulation: "let me take you home."
Nana just nods before wrapping her arms around your neck and kissing you again.
-
It's definitely on you for expecting anything different, but Nana fucks like she talks.
Conceited. Brash. A little selfish.
The girl's sitting there on her kitchen counter with one leg hooked over your shoulder. She's stripped herself down to near nothing save for those fuck-off ridiculous panties: slick, shiny with a thick strip of satin between her lips, complete with white lace frills and all; the same ridiculous pattern as the thigh-high stockings clinging tight around the soft-gentle fat of her legs and the lace top of her garter. Her pussy - all tight and pink and soaked - has left this shimmering, shiny mess that's trailing down the insides of her thighs.
Your fingers are in the elastic of her panties, near bruising the curve in her waist where she's rocking, flushed and keening against your grip.
You tell her, "take these off."
"Off?" She repeats it back to you with the same little grin: playing dumb, the smart, charming ass she's been all night.
"I'd tell you what I really want to do to you," you start, pushing your fingers in a little harder, eliciting another pretty moan. "But I'm really, really sure you can fill in the blanks yourself.
"I hope you're not planning on being rough with me," she teases, running her hands all through your hair as she pulls herself against you - and of course, it's her audacity to insist, "no marks." She drops a chaste little kiss along the underside of your jaw. "At least, nothing that might show up on a camera."
Someone with a little less baggage might have done just that. Might have jerked her panties down a couple inches further - ripped the cloth, exposed her even more. You might have followed the waistline further along the perfect round of her ass, found those dips and dimples that, maybe, no one else has ever gotten to explore. You may have grasped at the ends of her hair and gotten your fingers in her pussy without ceremony - driven Nana to the very brink of her climax just before palming two greedy handfuls of that ass - shoving yourself right there between her lips and, lost to shame, put a fucking kid in her.
All the things she must be dying for you to do.
"Something the matter?" She pushes her mouth into yours for a kiss that has all the urgency of a lazy Sunday morning. Your tongue against hers, languid and gentle at first; wet-sloppy, kissing and sucking on her bottom lip. You can feel her smirking when she says, "don't tell me you've forgotten how."
It's a lot, the effort you're putting in not to crumble - to crack at her taunts, snap your restraint, the temptation. You just wanna grab her pretty tits in both hands, shake her, and say: "shut the fuck up." But no - even in your wildest fantasy, you want to hear her first - beg you to make a wreck of her. So you force the words between your lips, dry and cracking:
"Not a fucking chance."
A laugh. "Guess I'm in good hands, then. Have to admit," Nana slides her hands down to hook under your own, bringing them lower. She grinds your fingers in slow circles over that one, aching, perfect little bud - a shock that has her curling tight inward until she's whining, clutching at her waist. "Not the - not the situation I had in mind."
Nana shifts her weight a bit more on one hip, guiding you through rubbing along the entrance to her slit - sloppy with precum, silky and aching - and when you place just the lightest pressure over all that hot skin, she opens her mouth:
"Ah."
Her eyes, her hair, her fucking mouth - you can’t look away - she’s so gorgeous it hurts.
Even the way she pants; the perfect furrow between her brows. And then, you dip a finger inside her, just to the first knuckle. It’s enough to make her whine, all shaky and high.
"Go on then, with how you’d pictured it," you press, already easing your digit in and out; slow, slick pumps that she is growing hotter, needier around. "I'm sure you've touched yourself to it more than a few times. The details and - stuff - must have been vivid."
"You haven't the slightest clue."
A brief kiss. You coax another shy sound from her, drawing a long sigh against her mouth -
"Try me, Nayeon."
"This is a lot closer to the truth than you’d think, professor." This time, no correction, she just smiles wide and tosses her head back, asking, sweetly, as if to absolve you of the responsibility. "Do you have any idea how long I've thought about it? You, me - us?"
Nana slips a finger between the buttons of your shirt and starts to pull.
On that detail, you actually, truthfully do not want to know.
"These... oh, how should I even call them." She hums softly just before easing a bit of distance between the two of you, head tilting like she's in a trailer for this summer's romcom, and not, you know, trying to drag you into hell. "Filthy little fantasies?"
"You know," you start. And by this point, her cunt's that much tighter. You've managed two fingers now, but no further, and she's making these desperate, punched-out gasps. Her clit's a swollen pink nub, jutting out from its soft hood. "I really had you pegged all wrong."
"Not - not at all. You can fuck me just fine, trust me - ah. Please, you can fuck me anyway you want."
And here, you grab a little higher on her hips, pinching her on the outside of a thigh, and begin working your fingers fast. You've never cared much for teasing, not really, but something about the way she squirms in your grip, tries to lean up and grasp onto your shoulders with shaking hands, it gets you smiling. It gets you grinning, even, especially the way she makes these pretty noises: a long, desperate little, "ah," at each press and thrust, her breath going high and uneven.
"Listen, Nana -" She squeals out loud when you push your fingers just a little deeper, a little bit harder. "I'm not going to talk about what a slut you've been today or how badly I want to spread you wide open," you can already tell it's affecting her: the sudden change, the subtle hitch in her breathing, the tremor where her thighs press together. "Tell me about you, about your little ideas. Let me help."
"Wouldn't be fair." Her pussy's getting tighter, urgent with want. And still:
"C'mon now. Humor me a little. There was probably-" you say, sliding down that ridiculous pair of underwear along her ass, tugging them over the curves of her legs - so slow and easy, all while you're not bothering with easing off. Nana moans again; voice pitched. "Lots. Lots and lots of dirty things - and, I'm willing to bet my career that they made you a hot, mess - an awful, soaking fucking wreck. Who could've guessed? You, of all people, with just the right kind of teacher's-pet-appeal, hm?"
And you meant it to be a joke, just some ribbing. But the question has her immediately tensing, looking at you very intently, no trace of shame as she snaps back -
"Your mouth." She rocks forward. "Your fucking mouth."
You shouldn't keep touching her, you shouldn't keep staring, you shouldn't push her flat on her back and shove your face right into her cunt, you should pull away before this goes too far - it shouldn't be your fingers drawing out sopping-wet gasps out of her pussy, nor should you press your tongue to her cunt, your mouth to all that delicate flesh and, at your first taste, shiver.
Nana laughs: shaky, nervous. Then, your fingers sink back into her pussy alongside your tongue, your lips, the way even your hot breath against her aching pussy has her all stunned, breathless - and -
"Please."
- right before she breaks off into a beautiful sound that catches her hard in the chest.
(A sound like you’re all she could ever want in this life, maybe the next; it’s this wordless plea.)
"Hah, I had - ah, had so much - hah - dirt on you, used to masturbate thinking - ah," and there, she arches her spine, forcing a sigh out, "thinking about how you might punish me." She laughs - nearly choking. "How you might break down all your veneer of being a good, moral man and fuck me raw and rough and - ah - fuck. Oh god, fuck."
You twist your fingertips up just so, right against this perfect spot in her, and all the sudden the entire line of her body seizes - stiffens up, the muscles in her thighs twitch as you both moan through the moment, the spasms reverberating in your own ears, loud and unashamed, right against her wet, wet clit. Your fingers are fucking and fucking and fucking away in her cunt, harder and faster and sloppier, every word, every groan, every gasped breath only making it easier to forget. To give in. And with every heavy slap and squelch of your fingertips digging in as deep as her body allows - you're sending her that much closer.
You pull back long enough to bite out: "cum whenever you want, Nana.”
She can’t, she can’t, she can’t, is what she’s trying to say, bracing against how your tongue moves around her clit, and she knows, there’s no use fighting it.
A kiss against her swollen mound and she writhes. “There you go sweetheart, cum for me.”
Nana comes undone. Gradually at first, then vaulting over that edge all at once. She lifts and lowers her hips - pushing your fingers into the smooth, velvety muscles of her cunt; rocking up and up again. It's a torturously slow kind of grinding, and her feet find purchase on either side of you as her toes curl, one heel digging into your shoulder. An assurance; a promise; a lifeline; that she might tremble and shake through it, moaning.
“Fuck,” and, “god,” and, “you’re gonna make me-” slip past her lips alongside all the assured gasped-out cries for relief - the orgasm sweeping through her, tearing her apart.
Back pitching, shoulders narrowing, face twisting, cinching tighter and tighter -
Until she collapses.
Until it’s over.
As she lays there, chest heaving, arm draped carelessly across her forehead and half over a kitchen cutting board - her thighs splayed open, fucked and spent - she's so, so beautiful.
And it’s in that sort of fucked-up-noodly-state where she just slides right into your arms - those long, slender legs wrapping tight around your middle. "Here's the deal," you say, grabbing hold of her hips and steadying her, as best as either of you can.
"Hm." This lazy, sated look, the way her tongue's dragged out - slow and slick - across the top of her teeth and bottom of her lips. "Go ahead, sir. I'm listening."
The lip service - that coy little appeal to authority that maybe you’re actually plenty fond of - it makes you stop for the barest of moments. This girl, she's unreal. How hard could you ever be asked to resist her?
She lifts a brow. "Professor."
So you continue:
"I'm going to get out of these clothes, and we are going to see what happens after that - if you have a preference for the bed or the sofa, now's your chance to pipe up. Or else -"
"Or else-" She repeats, shifting her weight around again. You can feel how she adjusts her heels to hang higher up your ribs, rocking her weight against your abdomen, against your cock - and the instinctual twitch that runs through your spine is turgid and rough. Like a shot. If it had a smell, it'd probably remind you of gasoline.
And then, maybe just to rile you up even more: "the dining room table makes a good impression of a teacher's desk, no?"
You slide your hand along the backs of her thighs until you have a good, tight, high hold on them and pick her up, leaving the panties, the stockings, all of it down where they can gather dust or whatever - she giggles, and tightens her hold around you like she doesn't need to worry about falling.
"I'd rather fuck you into a mattress to be perfectly candid."
Nana throws back her head and laughs - this real, honest-to-goodness peal of laughter, a hint of playfulness where there was usually just a practiced ease. "Oh. So forward."
(In all likelihood, you're both going to hell, and on the off chance you meet down there, you figure you'll fuck her then, too.
You've read the myths, the Greek tragedies, the ones that have these gods descending from the heavens on human women, for pleasure and nothing but, you've read those stories and plenty more - the details don't matter: it's always a bad, bad end for everybody involved.)
She takes you upstairs. And the two of you fall through the doorway to her bedroom, stumbling all the way.
Her apartment is simple and clean in the way all young adults try to emulate, all white countertops, but with pictures hanging in little, neat rows on the walls and the space void of anything with some sort of character or history.
You know because you're fumbling toward a dresser or desk or bookshelf in an attempt to orient yourselves, bumping and tussling, half-blind, on your path forward and all of a sudden there's a goddamn framed photo in your hand - not of her family, thank god. Though just about every other person in the picture is familiar to you, you remember every single one - but all you're capable of focusing on is Nana, Nayeon: not quite the same. The same glint in her eyes, the way her smile has a timeless kind of quality, the faint dimples in her cheeks.
And some wicked part of you is all too willing to ignore the whole timeline of events that has led up to you, Nana, like this: you want to pull her hair. You want to shove her around like she doesn't matter - is in any way disposable or replaceable; the most selfish parts of you wishing you could keep her pinned down by her slender neck; pressing a palm, bruising, into her collarbone as you start to work at your belt buckle and slacks with your other hand.
It's hard, getting a grip on yourself as Nana, sliding onto her bed and rolling across the sheets, pulls her stockings down the length of her legs - only stopping herself long enough to meet your eyes. Her throat bobbing.
“Of course,” she says, because your cock is hanging out by that point, straining and a little pent-up. "I fucking knew you would have a perfect cock."
"Flattery or sincerity?"
"Um, let's say both." She shifts around the pillow - that sweet little pout on her lips. Her gaze dropping from your mouth and running all along the length of your torso, lower and lower. Like her hands. And when her eyes flick up to meet yours, just when you're stroking at your cock, base and shaft, teasing yourself, well past the point of pretense, a devious smile spreads wide across her pretty, beautiful face. The implication: you aren't leaving here until you're cumming inside her.
And with a glimmer in her eyes, the sheer audacity, her fingertips ghost the underside of your cock as she draws up toward the head, "you're going to ruin me with this thing. You know that right?"
"A bit dramatic."
Nana moves to rest with the tops of her knees at the edge, her chin resting against the insides of her wrists, elbows propped up - poised, playful, everything she should be as the both of you regard each other a moment longer. "Can you blame me? It's not just that it's huge, I mean - I've barely even gotten a hold of it, and yet... god," she snorts. Her eyelids are heavy, mouth curved, almost a snarl as she drags her bottom lip through the grip of her teeth and sinks down onto the mattress.
"Say something filthy again," and this is a test, this is Nana testing you to see what exactly you'll get away with.
(Hint: it's a whole lot.)
She sighs. The image of indigence, innocence, everything pure and good you couldn't hope for. "Should I suck it or not? Or maybe, I don't know. Would you prefer me to beg for it first, ask if you'll put it in? Like, I think if you ordered me to put it in my mouth, right now, I wouldn't be able to say no."
"Really," the most sarcastic answer.
"Really," she continues. "For instance. If you came over here right now and guided me up and onto your dick and told me, specifically, that you were going to face-fuck me? I couldn't say no. No sir."
You could have her any damn way. You could have her, and you both know it.
"So tempting," you tease, mostly in earnest, "maybe another time, when my self-control isn't quite so lacking."
Nana hums a low, flippant sort of noise - like: whenever you're ready - and just how much trouble it gets you in, the mere suggestion, is what she is banking on.
"Hey," is her invitation, "I won't beg yet. You still want me to put my mouth all over it," and to emphasize, she slips her fingers between the plump pillows of her lips, smiling at how that makes you reach over the nightstand, accidentally pulling open a drawer, possibly reaching for the first aid kit, "or would you rather watch me stuff all these fingers in my wet, little hole."
A sharp inhale: it really would be fun, probably, but you can't take it.
"Nana," this voice, gravelly-ragged and harsh, "if you're planning to make me snap, you are, without question, on the right track."
"Then before that happens," she says, pulling you down into the bedsheets beside her. Your body flush against hers, the beat of her heart loud against your own; this gorgeous, pristine girl, so nakedly giving - this is an honor and a curse all rolled up together, no doubt.
And after a hot, wet kiss: "fuck me like I always thought you would."
(She was made to be like this; it's the only explanation.
Made for wanting. Made for fucking. Made to be loved and made to have her cunt fucked full - ruined by your fingers, your tongue, your cock. This absolutely perfect body, and all the delicious parts of her; this thing of desire, bashful and coy and that deserves all the world and, having none of the grace or courtesy to actually beg, orders, like she always knew she could:
"Like, right fucking now."
Or else.)
Then you're there - her hot mouth, her cunt, your fingers digging in bruising-tight all along the curve of her thighs where they meet her ass, hips, thighs, waist. She's pumping her soft palm and delicate fingers, slick with her spit and yours around the length of you and this isn't going to last long; not that there's any doubt you're going to leave her sore. But still, you drag the head of your cock across the swollen lips of her pussy, down through the plump swell of her clit until it rests where the ridge just begins and every slide, every pressure along every inch of your cock, the thought of being enveloped entirely in all that silky warmth is nearly the end of you.
A whimper, "professor."
You wrap your hands tighter around the smooth, firm muscles in her thighs; dragging your fingers back and forth across the supple skin there - just firm enough to elicit a reaction from the tension in her legs, until you have her flipped over on her stomach. Because if you're going to fuck her properly, it's going to be with her face buried deep into a pillowcase and you perched above her, holding her down against the sheets.
You watch her get her elbows underneath her, laying almost flat. Watch her trace the shape of her own jaw, her nose, her neck - the smooth expanse of her chest - as you straddle her thighs. With her ass pointed right up at you and the heel of her ankle gently grinding into the underside of your leg, you groan, placing both hands just above her ass. And once you're gripping the whole shape of her, you push your cock into her, just an inch, listening to the shift in her breathing.
She shudders, "don't tease - oh, please, sir-"
"Is this what you expected, Nana?" You grab onto her hair. Then again, when she tries to get her hands on herself. Her shoulders are high, tight. You just don't give her a chance; pushing yourself another inch, a couple. The pace, so gradual she starts making these soft, little breathless sounds as you stretch her tight pussy open. A few moments when she stops trying to bury her noises, her gasps - stops trying to angle her hips or squeeze or resist the thick shape of your cock where it is so, so hot and full inside of her - and there you stop. "What is it you had in mind, hm?"
"Ngh - oh."
Her cunt's clamping tight around just the first few inches of you. The tightness, the wet heat is staggering; how it pulls and begs with the words she seems reluctant to spill out.
So - you lift a hand, bringing it back down again onto the pale, rounded flesh of her ass with a smack, a gasp, and this wet sound from the sopping heat of her pussy, all aching and sobbing, "don't, fuck, stick it - fuck, put it - just. Just fucking get on top of me and pin me down - make it hard for me to breathe - do it, just. Like I, fuck, like I always wanted, sir, please-"
And you sink all the way in.
"Fuck." She bites into those consonants, a whole-body motion that pulls at the tension in her spine, the muscles in her legs. But her hips angle right up, and she presses her ass into the hollow of your abdomen and says, "thank you. Thank you. God."
"Don't get lazy on me," you say, grinding the tip of your cock in little circles; pulling it out and angling it down until it's prodding at all the right places to make her arch and shiver.
"Please," she says again, louder this time, almost a moan. "That. Fuck. Yes. It's."
"Yes, yes, I know. Nana, you-"
"Just use me. Whatever you like," she pants; then, once you've pulled yourself out to the tip, slowly filling her again, "use me like a fucktoy, alright. Because - fuck," Nana shivers, pushing her hips into yours. Her shoulders lower, as if by degrees, "please. Use me. Make it rough. Please, professor - use me however you want, I don't care - anything's fine with me - use me, as long and as much as you need, I. Please."
The real difference here, beyond anything else, is that this is no longer the game it was; the very instant she was sprawled across the mattress with a line of drool dripping into the sheets, all her bright, polished glory has vanished, leaving this bare edge of her exposed - the girl who lives solely to be fucked and used by your cock, her cunt leaking, begging for more. Reduced to the basics and nothing else.
"Your fucking cunt, Nana, the goddamn clench - you feel - it's-" (So fucking good, is what you can’t quite say, because she’s tight and wet and her tiny pussy is quivering like mad every time you bathe your cock in its scorching heat. Over and over.) It’s hard to think; you’re truly - truly - fucking her, but you can’t ignore the tautness in her spine either, bent below you. There are probably tears beading down her cheeks, but there's no helping the raw instinct screaming through the core of her being, pleading with you to pull yourself free, before sinking hilt-deep into her again, again, again - to a chorus of sloppy, loud, nasty, fucking whimpers and moans.
Like music.
It's easy after all, how her pussy gives way to you. How she molds around you - sleeves onto you like a glove - like there was only one cunt in the world you should ever be fucking up and fucking apart.
"It's incredible. Fuck. Just that perfect."
Nana, as best as she can, trying to stay steady, braced against her hands and knees, is raising her hips.
But it's clear with the way she's slipping all over, slicking the sweat off her palms and rocking her ass back into your thrusts, a cry falling out of her, unbidden, when she speaks and not.
"Please," she pants, through tears probably, this breathy-shivering. A renewed enthusiasm for your grip on her - where, in another place, you'd worry about leaving marks behind - for the feeling of your weight slamming down into her, driving the air from her lungs.
The sheets are a crumpled mess, pillows knocked from the mattress, where the two of you are shaking it apart.
You're pulling her apart, slowly, thrust by thrust into her sopping cunt, and in a promise of how you'll put her back together, you get your mouth on her shoulders, her neck, kisses in her hair, behind her ear - Nana just whimpers, curling her toes and ankles along the backs of your knees, her face against the pillow and gasping, "thank you - thank - thank-"
And when your palm smacks against the generous swell of her ass, again, she keens so perfectly for you.
It's a breathtaking sight, so good, so perfect: her flawless ass pitched high, round and flushed pink. The flutter of her eyelashes and the tears and drool. The outlines of her pale white cheeks sent into ripple after ripple, and then the way you can slide one hand forward between her shoulder blades and slip it into her hair, nails raking her scalp, grabbing a handful of hair in your fist and tilting her face - to the side, enough for her cheek against the pillow and the way her hips try to press against yours; try to chase the pleasure; this brash, gorgeous, slim-waisted, well-curved, exquisite young woman - like everything.
"Please," is all she says as you fit your chest up tight to her back and mouth at her neck - lick all along the sweat. "Please."
You can't take it anymore, can't keep watching this masterpiece, can't stand the molten heat wrapped around your cock every time the drag in and out of her pussy pulls sets every nerve on fire. Right in her ear: "I'm cumming, Nana, I'm cumming inside this tight, little pussy."
A short gasp, "yeah."
"Yeah. Inside, Nana. Cum inside, you -" You twist your fingers against her scalp and find purchase, an excuse - a means to yank her head around and lean into her, teeth against skin, that familiar coiling in your gut and the burning sensation that flows right alongside every slap and smack of her hips on your skin.
"Fuck me." You watch her bite down, swallow a sound, try to say: "fuck your load so deep inside me it’ll be all I think about for weeks, let me feel it, all that hot, all that sticky, fucking cum"
And you drag your hips, these final, punishing drags through her drenched cunt. Her fingers are white knuckled and fisting the sheets, until the very second you've pressed every ounce of your own body's worth into her own, when you're collapsing her spine and pushing her face into the bedspread, this wave rushes through your ears like the buzz and hum of insects and waves and things out of sync - the high, the peak -
And then:
Sobering, subjugating silence.
In fact, you're shuddering; You're cumming, spilling pools of thick cum deep inside of her. It's all in that warm, filthy sensation, a heady, hazy, desperate thrill when her own cunt seizes in its climax around you, trembling, throbbing, quivering, clenching; drawing everything out and taking your cock deeper - even while the whole of her is thrashing and bucking, all of this messy with her pleasure and her voice caught up, writhing and breathless.
"God-" is the last thing out of her mouth before you can kiss it quiet, tug on her lower lip and open her up like a present - messy and breathy, crying out, you're making this mess inside, this beautiful fucking mess - as the whisper you feel against your lips:
"Inside me, like that."
As you groan, deep and hot, "filthy fucking cumslut-"
Right on the verge, riding out every twitch of your cock and each flex of your hands at the skin around her ass, her waist, back and shoulder blades; even after you've caught your breath, you keep pumping more and more inside of her, you don't stop, won't, and even when you manage it, pulling out the head of your cock - you can feel every slick detail - just the slit and rim, resting the throbbing head of your cock at her swollen little mound, feeling the length of her fucked-out pussy spasm at the emptiness and trying to grasp around nothing - empty, tight and aching, sopping.
There's her hips, just this, right there; the line, the silhouette. Her thin waist and the curvy swell of her ass, jutting out straight - the cream-colored flesh dusted pink. The lithe, soft line of her stomach and the insides of her thighs a little farther along, sweaty and inviting.
She's so pliant in your grip, even though she's trying her best to curl herself backward - to angle your spent cock back into the ready, welcoming warmth of her slick, wet pussy - and once the afterglow has begun to wear away, that same greed and yearning takes its rightful place. A glimmer in her eyes. The unmistakable need and drive.
"One more," she says, wiggling her hips back into your stomach. "For me."
(The truth: you can't refuse her, not as she bites her lip and twists, all that soft hair splayed across her face, stuck to her tear-damp skin.
One more, because you both still want it. One more, because in the dim glow and evening air of her bedroom, everything that happens now matters just as much as anything that happened before.
One more, because you need her again.)
-
When she wakes in the dark, you figure her bed will be empty.
Nana will realize that you're gone. Of course you’ll be - it was never going to go differently; the sex had to end at some point. After all, if you stayed, eventually she'd start saying something you'd find a fault in or your skin would be so sensitive she couldn't stand not running a finger up your spine and maybe kissing your hip.
The reasons to go always outnumbered the reasons to stay.
The world would catch up and someone would find out and that's the sort of gossip that might leave both of your careers in shambles. Or else, you'd do something you couldn't come back from, the moment the heat of the sex left your body and her cunt, god, her perfect little cunt was spent - slackening - and the moments-after-haze, her legs locked up and her arms a bit sore, would clear up. Then you'd look at her, or else the shame would win out - the guilt and you'd call it quits. She won’t blame you. She can't.
-
But then again,
Her heart won't fall completely to pieces, because:
You've stayed. And it isn't an easy position, even if she is easy.
Here she is, though: sleeping on her side with her wrists crossed in front of her face - peaceful and quiet, probably tired enough to sleep without dreams. The dark has long since settled across her bedroom, save the pinpricks of stars in the sky out her window and a sliver of moonlight. You can see her, or you could reach out and run your hands all along her calves and thighs, but you don't.
Nana's shoulders slump forward in the faintest of sighs, and there it is - the slow, gentle swell and fall of her chest.
-
Here's how you got here:
In this scandal-in-waiting of a relationship. Here's the stupidest possible path, where a bright-eyed student with a crush fucks her older professor just once, and somehow you both find yourselves coming back for more, like maybe your very, very bodies belong together - a maddening compulsion.
Even once you've managed to work through the idea of your cum all inside of her, a seedy, twisted corner of your mind murmurs how it makes the most sense. To stick your cock inside of her again.
Where she can show you the way it can look; the mess and the texture of the slick, white spill - dribbling out of her pussy in the afterglow, onto her palm, and down the crevice in her ass and lower.
It's the phone calls probably - and not just the phone sex - late-night talking, conversation and every once in awhile, the kind of hot, hard fucking that gets you in trouble, but also a reason to be with each other again. Not just the quick fucks but the nice ones - the days, the late nights and mornings and what have you: all the casual intimacy of it. All the sweet nothings exchanged.
The after-sex cuddling, with her straddling your lap;
The sensation of her thighs sliding into place around the tops of your legs, her arms tucked around your neck;
The kisses you don't take and kisses you'd be okay with, all the promises made to love you as many times as necessary, however necessary, wherever.
That's all here too.
Again:
She is young. But, who the fuck are you to say? Who the hell can tell you she doesn't deserve the least rotten, least painful, most promising love she can find in this particularly fucked-up world?
Who else is going to keep the both of you safe and hidden?
And who else, despite everything, seems to like having a secret that they're sure only you know; every glance or accidental touch with her eyes brimming, alive, and the whole of her bent like a bow-string - all held back and wound-up tight.
To the point her spine will shiver and shake; you know how it can be.
-
"Are you actually going to buy those?" Nana asks one day, dangling on her toes, chin rested comfortably in the sweep of your shoulder.
When she crowds the swell of her hip and her breasts and her entire body into your back and snakes her arms around your shoulders, you think there's nothing else in the world you need.
"You called them drivel," she adds, almost pouting - which is a look you're slowly trying to inoculate yourself against because the moment it comes up, you have a knee-jerk reaction to drop anything and everything and carry her off someplace else. To have a place where she could, could, could -
"Hah," you roll your eyes, not taking the bait. There's a shelf-full of campy, smutty romance novels in the dollar bin. "It is. The story was less than complicated, but I couldn't figure out what the hell two or three characters' plotlines had to do with one another, and sometimes you just want a little guilty pleasure, you know?"
"Ooh. So," Nana smiles, the devious sort. "I guess there is some honesty in you after all."
"Come on, this one at least has an original story," and it is a shameless attempt, "plus-"
"I know, I know. Fine. And if it is so terribly bad, well, I suppose I can use your chest as a pillow to take a nap," she says, before throwing this particular glance over her shoulder.
The cashier doesn't need to ask if the two of you want your copies of 'Wild West of the Heart' or whatever-the-fuck this one is titled, scanned separately.
All of that, those paperback-cover love stories and TV drama plots, these are the sorts of things you do just for Nana; as the two of you wait in long lines, get carried along, get bumped and pushed, like every other ordinary-person thing you've done for her ever since.
("Honestly, this isn't my kind of thing either," you tell her in the aisle of a grocery store once. The fluorescent lighting only accentuates the blush high on her cheeks. "don't make me fuss over something like this."
"Have a little sympathy," she insists, nudging the handle of the shopping cart against the inside of your shins. "A girl like me isn't good for much else.")
It's not romance, really, that's such a fucked up way to go about describing any of it, but then there's Nana, bouncing on her heels and prattling on, this girl in the spring of her life who is full to the brim and bursting with the most chaotic and eclectic sorts of thoughts and passions -
So, what.
"Really," she adds - another side, another angle on an issue the two of you had an hour ago while cooking breakfast. "Just, think about it. Would you honestly put all this effort into somebody who doesn't make you laugh at least as much as they irritate you? Because like, you would never tolerate some self-obsessed jerk long enough to eat their burnt, terrible pancakes every day of the week."
"Fine. Maybe." You sit across the table. "You're right."
Nana blinks and this look of wonder crosses her face as she grins. A moment of triumph for her and that was more than the honest truth. It's still strange, admitting defeat in any argument here or there, or that the two of you make an actual decent couple - together. The kinds of things that come naturally to other people.
"Any more caveats to all of this, professor?"
"You’re gonna end up bent over that counter again if you keep pushing it, kid."
The both of you break out laughing and then you finish your coffee, or she stabs the last few pieces of cantaloupe on her plate, or you kiss her neck, and just -
Everything.
#wooah smut#nana smut#kwon nayeon smut#el7z up smut#kpop smut#male reader#capslocked kinkvember#woo ah smut#woo ah nana smut
1K notes
·
View notes
Note
Hi, so i’m a lurker but I kinda decided to stop lurking and personally want to request if you can maybe write a headcanon of the Destined one or Sun Wukong when reader would occassionally glances at them but its only because Reader have a crush on them and is trying to play it off that they dont have a crush
Also love your writing-
Here you go!! One for each :) just because I feel like they’d be a bit different. (Also you’re so kind for saying you like my stuff 🫶🫶🫶)
You’ve got a crush but aren’t trying to be sussed out yet? Oh boy. Poor you. He’s noticed. 100% noticed you looking at him and the little awkward thing you do when you look away quickly.
Destined One:
- [ ] Does NOT know what you’re staring at him for.
- [ ] Absolute idiot when it comes to romance, he’s been too focused on his journey to care about that kind of stuff.
- [ ] Completely lost. Starts to wonder if maybe there’s something stuck in his fur or maybe you think he stinks or something, he doesnt know.
- [ ] It’s giving him a complex because WHY does he catch you eyeing him so much? (And why does it get under his skin?)
- [ ] Do you want to fight him? Is he doing something strange?
- [ ] Starts watching you closer than he already was, probably squints/frowns deeper when he catches your eyes lingering on him before you quickly turn away. His tail will start to twitch with annoyance because WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT AND WHY WONT YOU TELL ME?
- [ ] Does he look weird? Is there food stuck in his chin fur?
- [ ] It bothers him in more ways than one. Again, now he’s aware of it he cant stop wondering about it but also, the more he see’s you do it the more awkward he acts and he gets a bit shy about it.
- [ ] Makes his fur ruffle and makes him twitchy.
- [ ] Starting to like the way you look at him, eventually he will figure out WHY he likes it.
- [ ] Don’t stare at other people though because he wants your eyes on him regardless of if he realizes it or not. It will annoy him because he thought you only glanced / stared at HIM.
- [ ] Over time he will notice if your cheeks tint pink. It’s going to make him VERY intent on you and your flustered state. He’s already pretty intense anyway but now you’re going to have his full attention as he tries to decide if maybe look him makes you sick or something. Which he would HATE.
- [ ] He’d gonna start showing off (fighting or mundane tasks) especially if he notices you staring at certain moments - this will be an unconscious act at first before deliberate.
- [ ] At some point he is going to grab your chin as you look away and silently demand you tell him why you’re staring at him so much.
Wukong:
- [ ] He clocked you glancing at him almost immediately. He’s too vain and aware not to.
- [ ] That said, he doesnt know WHY. At first.
- [ ] He’s used to people staring, he does make a spectacle of himself very often. And in his mind, why shouldn’t people stare at him? He’s amazing and all the synonyms of that word. So at first he doesnt mind it since he figures you’ll get your fill of whatever it is you’re looking at him for.
- [ ] When you dont though and he keeps catching you looking at him, well now hes curious. A curious Wukong is a dangerous thing.
- [ ] Your glances are starting to get under his fur too. Because WHY are you peeking at him?
- [ ] If others were to do it he wouldn’t care, outside of maybe using it to start a fight with them, but you? Regardless of if he realizes it or not he’s falling for you and your eyes on him makes him feel tingly.
- [ ] He’s going to start testing you. Will definitely pretend he doesn’t notice you looking for a while.
- [ ] But he’s going to start doing certain things to note exactly WHEN you stare at him so he can determine WHY. Because apparently you dont want him to know, and he going to store that nugget for future mischievous opportunities.
- [ ] But also, what if you know something he doesnt? That isnt going to slide.
- [ ] So he watches you carefully as he purposely does things to see your different reactions to them.
- [ ] He’s gonna figure you out real fast though especially when your cheeks flush pink while you were staring at his chest, his shirt had gone a little more loose than normal (might have done that on purpose).
- [ ] He is going to have the fattest smirk on his face and his tail is going to swish behind him like the arrogant jerk he is. You like him. Or at least find him pleasing to look at.
- [ ] He’s going to amp up his “do things to make them stare” mission.
- [ ] “Oops I spilled on my shirt, I guess I have to take it off” or “look at me while I do this ridiculous unnecessary show of strength” kind of shit and always right in your view.
- [ ] As much as seeing you try to cover your tracks is funny and amusing to him, eventually he’s going to get impatient with it.
- [ ] He is gonna call you out. - however THAT conversation turns out is up to you.
- [ ] But now that it’s out in the open he’s going to make sure that whenever he does something he is going to look over at you expectantly like ‘Are you watching? Yeah you’re watching. Of course you are.’
#black myth wukong#sun wukong x reader#black myth wukong x reader#destined one x reader#bk kai writes#Good luck anon! They are too aware to NOT notice#LOL Wukong is always a menace#Poor DO he just never has a clue
358 notes
·
View notes
Text
april fools post translation 👍 * indicates i have notes on the translation if you want to read below
Hyun Woo —> He stopped acting in his childhood but is currently working on ALNST as a lighting crew member. Worries about his dull, slow sister
Hyuna —> The last and youngest of the ALNST cast to debut! Her real personality is gentle and innocent
Mizi —> Fan favourite among the actors. Shy personality and very nervous about her first leading role
Sua —> The feisty actress is popular among her co-stars, thanks to her nonchalant friendliness
Sua: Great job on the shoot today. I’m sure Director Kim was only speaking so harshly because he was worried about your safety, so don’t take it personally.
Mizi: Yeah.. ((It’s sunbae!!! What should I do! What should I do!!))
Sfx: Thump thump thump [heartbeat sound]
Ivan and Luka are actors from a different agency. They’re also in an idol group together (for the record, Luka hates it)
Ivan —> Ivan loves kids and voluntarily takes care of them
Luka —> Luka is Ivan’s best friend, so he’s forced to babysit with him
Baby Till —> Baby Till for flashback scenes
Baby Mizi —> Baby Mizi for flashback scenes when the kids are older
Till —> Till, the youngest in the series, is actually the oldest in the cast and debuted with CF before he could even speak in a diaper commercial. Till has a strong “my pace”* persona. He just wants to quickly wrap up the shoot and go home. His dark circles are from overwork, not make-up.
Others —> Three people who want to approach their mysterious** senior but can’t
Ivan: ((Lamenting over delays..?))
Mizi: Want me to talk to him?
Luka: Yeah
Till: ((I want to go home))
Sfx: Spacing out~
*according to namu wiki, either someone who’s strongly independent and doesn’t care what others think or someone who’s always chill
**according to namu wiki, the adjective translates to a famous person who deliberately keeps their private life secret. i just went with mysterious bc it directly translates to “mystic”
i didn’t choose to translate sunbae in Mizi’s thoughts because it sounds weird and most of you probably know what it means anyway
lol it looks like everyone’s personalities were flipped. does that mean ivan actually hates kids? and till as the cool mysterious senior everyone is scared to talk to vs hyuna as no thoughts head empty is kinda funny. i have a feeling ivan and luka are shipped together a lot by fans in this au.. the woes of being besties. also mizisua is always canon 🙏 theyre so yuri
#alien stage#alnst hyuna#alnst mizi#alsnt sua#alnst ivan#alnst luka#alnst till#official art#translations
887 notes
·
View notes
Text
To all the nosy neighbour enjoyers, thank you for being that. Anyway here's my propaganda!! Just some of my favorite moments tee hee
Sorry if my BigB looks weird (I tried really hard :( ) I'll pretend that that's intentional given my rabbit hybrid BigB thoughts under cut:
I made a little post about this before but basically BigB has such rabbit behavior:
1. Cannot help but keep burying himself underground like it's his natural habitat (seriously he comes back on ground to build a house on a mountain and then immediately makes an elaborate underground hideout again. Or how he built backrooms in SL and kept retreating there. Or how he was literally underground when he ran into Pearl, for Pearl to inform him that it was night time and BigB immediately wanting to retreat back underground. Or how he was underground for almost the entire "red winter is coming" session. Or)
2. Often fidgety around others
3. Constantly cautious but doesn't let nervousness show if there is any
4. More prone to keeping distance and watching rather than engaging
Idk he is extremely prey animal behavior (positive, affectionate) and I can never see him as anything but a rabbit now. I considered giving him rabbit legs too but then I was like nah. Because I think him having weird rabbit posture in a mostly human body contributes some inherent awkwardness and a bit of uncannines (fitting with his gaslighting tendencies). After all he's kind of out of his element above ground (or that's how he acts!) and that's when people are going to be seeing him. But just you wait till he stands tall for a change to tell someone off (like Cleo in SL or Scott in LimL). And with such posture, he inadvertently makes himself look smaller, which certainly would help him weasel his way out of undesired situations like he often does, eg by talking people into pitying him to save himself from dying. I'd also like to imagine him to be smart enough to manipulate his rabbit ears to not betray how he's feeling or to make others think he's feeling a certain way, unless he feels particularly threatened or something. That's maybe half the appeal of animal ears to me, that they can be an added tool for emoting, but a hybrid moving them in deliberate ways is a fun concept!
Oh and he has caving boots!!
I do kind of seethingly hate how he looks with his ears drawn back but I did the best I could. I really hate having human ears in addition to animal ears personally, but if I put his ears any further up where they'd look cuter (Pearl's antennae for comparision) it'll look really weird. Aghh whatever he's supposed to be awkward so whatever please ignore it Im going to cry
Also if you think the old design is cuter, it's almost certainly because of the lesser facial hair lol trust me!! And I changed the curly hair to be a bit less curly in likeness to Lee from Walking Dead because I did not realize that BigB's skin is basically that and I couldn't help myself. I was overall really unhappy with my old BigB design so yay for redesign. I swear its not just animal features that make things interesting for me...... maybe somewhat....
#thank you guys for voting big/pearl over big/grian I actually didnt think itd happen (Grian curse) (I LOVE Grian and the secret soulmates!!)#bigb#bigb fanart#pearlescentmoon#nosy neighbors#limited life fanart#not drawn with shipping in mind view as you wish#also I hope to god no one interprets the “He's mine” thing as yandere Pearl please do not do that thats not what that is#she's just protective. it's her first real friend since double life cut her some slack#trafficblr#tubby art
543 notes
·
View notes