#but no like im slowly getting better at this

[thepitlanepress]

NEVER TOO BUSY FOR YOU –

↳ oscar piastri + gf!reader

⌗ :: masterlist

⌗ :: a/n: i like to think im the sweetest person alive so this is written for my girl nadsies while she isnt having the greatest day ever. just a short lil fic bc im working on the smau pt2 and some other ones ;)

you dont like bothering oscar when he's at work. its a weird thing you have, one that oscar's tried getting out of your head on more than one occasion. does it stick? no.

the cramps you had been feeling for the entire day had made it almost impossible to move, so you weren't exactly able to reach your phone to tell oscar either.

that is a fact you use in a later argument. which by the way doesn't work.

so when the door to your apartment swings open and you hear your boyfriend's voice, you nearly flat out start crying. its so nice to hear a comforting sound.

"sweetheart?" oscar calls out for a second time when you don't reply, even talking feels like too much right now. you hear some shuffling around and then the soft footsteps as he walks down the hallway.

"hey, baby," he murmurs when he enters the room, coming to sit next to you on the edge of the bed. his hand comes to rest on your back rubbing slowly through the duvet. "how are you feeling?"

a noncommittal grunt escapes you and you wince in pain as another wave of cramps hit you like a train. fuck periods actually.

oscar sensing your situation quickly, he gets up and places a quick but soft kiss to your forehead before walking back out to the kitchen promising to be back soon. you stay awake for a little while but eventually the sounds of him moving around, and the soft clinking of dishes quickly puts you to sleep.

it was a comfort knowing someone else was home with you.

some time later you feel a dip in the bed beside you, two arms wrap around your waist and pull you into their warmth.

"hey you," you whisper.

"hey you," he whispers back his hand drawing circles on your skin. "are you feeling better after that nap?"

"sort of," you sigh. "mainly im-"

"hungry?" oscar guesses, you can hear the smile in his voice and you slowly sit up, cautiously testing different positions before finding one that doesn't make you feel like you've been shot.

you look over at oscar who has turned away bringing a tray of snacks over from the bedside table. it has all your favourite snacks, chocolates, your phone and a warm cup of tea.

"i called mum, while you were asleep earlier," he said almost nervously. "and asked her what type of tea to use because i was worried and wanted to help and she said to use-"

you shut him up by placing a kiss on the corner of his mouth "its perfect thank you osc," you settle back against the pillows - and him, okay mostly him. his arms are wrapped around you as you soak in the quiet afternoon, the soft sound of the show you had playing on your computer earlier the only noise in the room.

"why didn't you call me?" his voice rumbles through you.

"i didn't want to bother you while you were at work," you look down to the cup of tea in your hands and realise now that you probably won't be winning this conversation. there is no one who cared more about you than the man currently wrapped around you. he would drop anything in a second for you.

hence why you didn't call him. he cant be distracted from work. its so important to you.

but he won't take that as an answer.

"you know i always have time for you, sweetheart, i'm never too busy for you. you're my number one priority. always."

the cramps didn't seem so bad after that.

2025 © thepitlanepress | please do not steal, use, translate or repost any of my works

– comments, likes and reblogs appreciated !

[gumii-bearr]

i need stoner alt!gumi fucking railing and breeding his pretty lil partner (i am high as im sending this)

EHEHEHEHEHE

❝ insatiable ❞

summary: your boyfriend likes to get high, most of the time he's just mellow and likes to cuddle with you... but sometimes he loses control.

featuring... megumi fushiguro

content warning: MDNI (18+), afab!reader, alt!megumi, stoner!megumi, college!au, weed, megumi smoking during sex, p in v sex, breeding kink, doggy, choking, headlocks oh lawd, bruising, bit of spanking, hair pulling, rough sex, unprotected sex, creampies, this was supposed to just be drabbles but oops now it's a fic

author's note: you better believe he loves you 'cus he bout to fuck you like he dont <3

You like how soft your boyfriend gets when he's high.

Whenever he smokes, he likes to lay his head on your thighs so you can run your fingers through his messy hair. He holds a joint between his index and middle finger, occasionally blowing smoke up into your face to get your attention.

He likes it when you trace a pretty acrylic nail along his tattooed forearms, tracing the intricate art while he lifts the joint to your lips, letting you take a drag and chuckling softly as you cough and giggle.

Most of the time, your boyfriend acts very mellow. You watch movies or cuddle while he's high and you occasionally let him slowly eat you out because when he's high, he has absolutely no sense of urgency.

But there are some rarer occasions where Megumi simply can't satiate his hunger and his need for you.

"F-Fuck–" Megumi's pace is fucking brutal, his hips slamming against your plush ass, drilling his cock deeper and deeper into your tight heat. Your hands clutch the sheets, your face pressed into the pillow as you moan and cry into the tear-soaked fabric.

You don't know how many times you've cum, all you know is that you want more.

Your mascara is running down your cheeks, mixing with your tears and making you look so fucked out. Megumi is groaning behind you, his massive tattooed hands leaving bruising marks on your hips from how hard he's pulling your ass back to meet every snap of his hip.

"Mm, baby–" Megumi lifts one hand off your hip, picking up the joint from the ashtray on the bed and taking a long drag. "Feels s'fucking good."

You can't respond, your moans muffled by the pillow. Megumi's hand suddenly tangled in your hair right at the base of your skull. He yanks your head off the pillow, forcing you to finally hear how fucking loud you are.

"I wanna hear you," Megumi murmurs, blowing smoke right by your head, "s'pretty."

All you can hear is the lewd squelching of your soaked cunt and skin slapping against skin, the sound making your tummy burn with desire.

Megumi suddenly wraps a thick tattooed forearm around your neck, pulling your smaller body against his broad chest. Your back arches against him, the new angle forcing a gasp from your swollen lips.

He squeezes his forearm to his bicep, choking you out as he sucks and bites at the soft skin of your shoulder, hips still slamming against your pretty ass.

You gasp for air, your pretty manicured hands scratching at his forearm as you cry and moan pathetically. He lifts the joint to his lips again, taking a long drag and holding it in his chest.

You're both covered in sweat and the whole room smells of weed and sex and it's fucking intoxicating.

"M'gonna breed this tight little cunt," Megumi mutters against your ear, your pussy clamping down on his thick cock at the mere thought.

"P-Please–" you don't even know what you're begging for, feeling your mind start to go dizzy from the lack of oxygen.

Megumi chuckles, releasing his arm from around your neck and forcing your head back against the pillow, his large hand wrapped around the back of your neck.

"Oh, yeah?" Megumi taunts, landing a hard smack! to your plush ass as it bounces against his hips. "You wan' me to fuck a baby into you, pretty girl?"

You feel the tip of his cock prod against your cervix, your pussy sucking him in. You feel every ridge and vein of his thick cock, your slick dripping down the inside of your shaking thighs.

"Yes! Yes, yes!" you beg him for it, beg him to fuck every morsel of his cum into your greedy cunt.

You hear Megumi chuckle behind you, one hand snaking over your hip and between your thighs to rub at your swollen clit.

You just about scream at the feeling, your back arching, legs shaking and cunt spasming around him as your high crashes into you.

But Megumi doesn't let up, fucking you hard through your high and groaning about what a good girl you are. You gush around him, your arousal soaking your ass, your thighs and his pelvis. But it only eggs him on more.

"F-Fuck, yeah, baby–" Megumi rolls you onto your back, your body completely flushed and your brain fucked absolutely stupid on his big cock.

And Megumi hasn't even cum once.

Another thing about him being high, he can go for fucking hours and not cum, despite making you fall apart and squirt all over him, yourself and the sheets.

"M-More, Gumi– I wan' more–"

And you're just as fucking desperate as him.

Megumi wraps a big hand around your throat, your smaller hands clutching his wrist and forearm as he presses his aching cock back into your sopping hole.

He lifts his blunt to his lips, taking a long inhale, tipping his head back and breathing it out. You just about cum from the sight alone. Your boyfriend always looks so damn fine when he smokes.

"Wan' some?" Megumi holds the blunt out for you.

You take it with shaking fingers, lifting the messily rolled blunt to your lips, taking a long inhale while Megumi's hands take their bruising hold on your hips, fucking his cock into you again.

You feel the burn behind your nose, your brain a little fuzzy from your orgasm and the copious amount of smoke swirling around in Megumi's room.

You drop the blunt on the ashtray, pressing up on one elbow to wrap an arm around Megumi's broad tattooed shoulders, forcing him to hover over you.

You press a desperate and wet kiss to his lips, tasting the mix of your arousal and weed on his lips. Megumi groans against your lips, fucking his aching cock harder into your clenching hole.

"Breed me, Gumi– Please, I wanna make you a daddy–" you mutter against his skin, Megumi's reddened steely eyes boring into yours.

"Fuck, baby–" Megumi groans followed by an amused laugh.

He's using you as a fucking fleshlight at this point, manhandling you into whatever position he wants you, resting your legs over his shoulders and folding you in fucking half.

Megumi pins your wrists above your head, pulling his cock almost all the way out before plunging it back into your tight heat. You throw your head back, your tummy burning and your pussy virtually numb from how hard he's been fucking you.

"Fuck– that's it, pretty girl," Megumi peers down between your bodies, watching your pussy suck him in as a frothy ring of white forms around the base of his cock.

He presses on your belly with the ball of his palm, feeling his cock fuck into your cunt and rearrange your fucking insides.

You cry out, "m'gonna cum– G-Gumi–" your nails scrape down his tattooed back, surely leaving angry red marks.

"Fuck yeah, sweet girl– milk my fucking cock–" Megumi reaches a hand down, rubbing tight circles over your oversensitive nub.

You throw your head back, mouth falling open as you choke out a strangled moan. Your cunt clenches down on Megumi's rock-hard cock, your arousal gushing out of you and spraying all over the sheets.

Megumi's head falls against your shoulder, balls tightening as he finally cums into your pretty pussy. Ropes of hot cum paint your gummy walls, filling you to the fucking brim.

He fucks his cum into you and you whine at the feeling of it dripping out of your fucked-out pussy.

"Hah–" Megumi pants against your shoulder, slowly pulling his cock out of your abused hole.

"Mm, Gumi–" you whine softly, fresh tears slipping down your cheeks.

Megumi picks up a new blunt, plucking the lighter off the bedside table and flicking it alight.

You just pant underneath him, shaky legs falling loosely over his pretty tattooed waist. Your baby hairs stick to your face, Megumi gently moving some of your hair off your sweaty forehead as he takes a long drag.

Megumi lazily scoops his cum up from between your sticky folds, pushing it back into your hole. You whine at the feeling, breathing out a slow sigh.

Megumi chuckles, placing the blunt back down on the ashtray and gripping his still-hard cock at the base, tapping it against your clit.

"Ready to go again, baby?"

author's note: OH TO HAVE SOMEONE FUCK ME LIKE THIS–

[nxuriah]

Bathroom Break

Neighbor!Choso overhears you.

content warnings: MDNI, masturbation, voyeurism, modern AU, neighbors.

pairing: Choso x petite fem!reader

a/n : first time writing smut, pls be nice. I know it's a bit rushed but im ready to move on from this draft thats been sitting here for ages. 😭

You were the nicest, most goody two shoes girl in the building, and everyone knew it. Always saying hi with a bright smile as you exchanged glances, lending a hand whenever you could, bringing over little sweet treats you'd baked, and Choso adored every bit of it. Soon enough, those small morning exchanges turned into letting Choso come over whenever he got lonely, which became quite frequent as he moved in. Since that first day, God graced his doorstep with what– more like whom Yuuji liked to call a “literal Disney princess,” you were the cutest girl he'd ever seen. So, nothing could have prepared him for the events that followed his midnight bathroom break.

Eyes half shut, choso pulled down the toilet lid before lazily reaching for the flush not rendering that muffled sound once but the second time he stilled, actually catching it. He wasn’t sure what that noise was before it grew into little groans.

Now he couldn't care less about what lonely old guy was watching porn, before hearing that soft melody of a voice whimpering out profanities. That same voice he had memorized by now. Oh. That's not porn. He thought because that familiar voice was unmistakable to him by now.

Good morning. She'd call out from behind me. I could hear the smile in the sound of her greeting.

Blood rushed straight to his cock as your soft pants travelled the thin walls. He found it hard to believe that this was the same innocent looking girl who made his days better with her infectious smile. Part of him didn't want to believe it. Choso had always liked you but he would never have even begun to think of you inappropriately much less get aroused by you but when his length strained against his pants which felt tighter by the second. He couldn't stop the images flooding through his mind at your increasing moans.

Fuck– Were you even trying to be quiet? He breathed out softly.

Choso could never imagine you thinking about such lewd things, much less being so careless about it. A sense of guilt flooded him as he begrudgingly loosened his pajama pants, scared that you would somehow know. His trembling hand slowly trailing downwards and wrapping around himself. Just a small rub he thought before finding his thumb tracing shaky circles over his sensitive tip, reluctantly moving down his length. By then his hands moved on their own pumping up and down in a steady rhythm.

He didn't know any better and Yuuji told him when it's like this…he could just ease it himself, so he did. Could you blame him? He was aching down there.

It was hard not coating the bathroom floor immediately after hearing you cry out. He leaned against the wall now fisting his cock, which grew slick in minutes. Only from your sounds..those oh, “so- fucking–thrust pretty- thrust” sounds.

He panted letting out muffled whines himself imagining your sweaty and tired body all spread out under your cute little hands, knuckles deep plunging in your sopping cunt relentlessly as you sobbed out more of those filthy sounds. Choso had never heard a girl like that. Not that he had any experience but even in the things Yuuji showed him he never heard something that made him such a (pretty) mess.

His tip flushed furiously pink as he barely held on. Choso wanted to match each stroke, each thrust to your pornographic cries but the poor inexperienced boy could only last so long, his balls tightening quite soon letting out thick ropes of his cum all over the bathroom wall dripping on to the floor biting into his hand to stop his groan. His knees went weak, imagining you coated in it.

He heard you finish yourself soon after your voice softened down to satisfied coos rather than your earlier pathetic cries. His length twitched still hard, desperate to now actually feel you. Choso had to fist his cock a few more times that night before he was able to fall asleep.

Sleep wasn't great, though, as the shame took over him. Although he wanted nothing more than to see you now, how could he possibly face you tomorrow morning?

...Part 2??

[howspiitaldoll]

How i water fasted for 10 days straight in january ୨ৎ .ᐣ

1. The most important thing was, that i really had a serious goal to reach. I was extremely motivated, especially cause i had to look my best for a special day, so there was a date set, and i knew that i would be disappointed if i messed up.

2. I didn't jump straight into a fast. I slowly took -100 cals from my intake, adjusting my body slowly, this way it wasn't that much of a shock for it.

3. I drank a lot of water, and when i say a lot i mean i prepared a big cup with ice and sipped everytime i felt worse or hungry.

4. I slept good and long 🩰 Sleep is and will always be the best way to skip time. Everytime i would feel demotivated, even a little bit, i would get under my covers and take a nap. It also made me feel better during the day if i got good sleep.

5. One of the days i couldn't stand not tasting anything, so i got a zero sugar energy drink that was 2 cals for the whole thing, and i immediately felt better and felt like i could keep going.

6. I used a lot of distractions, the ones that always work for me. I really chose things that took time, so it was passing without me realising it. I played lots of games, watched shows, spent hours on pinterest or tiktok, called or texted my friends, made vision boards, did online shopping, and more!

7. I avoided two things - exercising and weighing myself. I always want to exercise bcuz i feel like im not doing enough, but for 10 days i decided to not do it to not make myself too weak. Instead i just moved around, cleaned my room or the house, took a short walk. I avoided weighing myself too much, bcuz it became a little demotivating, and i wanted to see the ultimate result at the end. (it was a nice suprise)

8. I used one of my fav things to do, i brushed my teeth to keep that minty feeling in my mouth, then put a lip product on my lips, when i do this it makes me not want to put anything in my mouth to not ruin the feeling.

9. I motivated myself everyday, with whatever i could. I looked at my saved photos, searched for motivation on tiktok and tumblr, i opened my notes and wrote all the reasons why i want it to work.

10. I kept writing in my diary, which allowed me to express all of my emotions there, when i didn't want to post some of the thoughts or share it with anyone, i just wanted to let it out somewhere. (my diary listened very well)

11. If i really needed the feeling of actually chewing smth, i made and crushed ice cubes and kept biting on them.

12. I avoided drinking energy drinks (even though i did drink one that one day), i know most of us here love the zero ones, including me, but i really didn't want to make myself shaky.

[haveihitanerve]

BUS! I know I came back to land for a reason…

Also- for-word: um. Be prepared? Its not innocent. At all. Not about a bus. Um. yeah. Don't watch around people. Yeah. thats all the advice i can offer. Now go off into the world Penelope Jemima B. D. And show the world who you are 😭

(the amount of distress i had while watching this is insane) anyway:

Idk what AJ and Tom were saying at the very beginning but cuteness 

“You're gonna fucking love it.” Tom is an iconic king but also AJ and Sam laughing at his dumb little jokey intro will always be the cutest thing to me

“Hopefully in that order…” yes please lol

“BUS!” AJ really enjoyed that- gorgeous cackle, 10/10. Sam doesn't know what to do with that and Tom has just reverted to repeating it bc… wow

“First murder.” “last murder” goodness gracious what lmaooo

Toms little pat on AJ’s back as they started the scene 😭

AJ awkwardly scooting away as Sam comes closer but also moving closer because he needs to at all times be touching them 😭

“You don't see young people reading anymore.” Ok idk if its intentional or not but every time we get a scene like this in any way sam always starts insulting young people for being on their “tablets and iphones” and etc etc, and i don't know if its an actual grievance that he has at this point lmao(even tho we as fans connect to them thru this but wtv lol) or if hes mocking old people for their grievances and either one works for me really lol i just wanna knowww

Sam: Good book? AJ: *every book ever created ever in the history of ever leaves his mind* yeah yeah, uh u-yeah uh its the-the the- the sexbook. Yeah thats such a good book AJ, i agree

“Quite a coincidence.” AJ: *blinks, not sure what to do with that information just casually dropped with nothing else* wha-what Sam: *smirks* Tom: *offstage* :D 

Sam: I wrote the sexbook Tom: *oh did you??* *legs crossed, hand over mouth, classic tom pose that slays every. single. time.*

“Arthur big dick” Tom shaking with silent laughter, AJ almost caving with a laugh, Sam laughing as he says it. Idk shared laughter means a lot to me

“Name five of them.” No thats foul- because AJ couldn't even think of one and now you’re making him come up with fivvveee titles sam??? Thats loowwww XD

“Big Dick 1, 2, 3 ,4 and 5.” The groan of the crowd lmaooo- they really wanted to hear AJ come up with creative titles lol

Tom’s disappointed nose pinch in the corner XD

“Im just gonna fangirl here real quick-” yes AJ! Yes! Finally we are represented!!

Sam: You're a girl? *slowly removes his hand from Aj’s shoulders* AJ: *did not think that far ahead, nor that it’d be commented on* ye-yes? Sam: ah.*contemplates* this is much creepier than I thought it was LMAOOOOO (Toms little grin shaky laugh in the corner 🫠)

“I just feel like your writing- it just really gets to the heart of- of the sexual experience.” truly, inspirational work Sam

“Didn't like it.” Silence as AJ just stares at him. :| yes. Do continue. 👀

Tom and AJ’s laugh as Sam just doesn't answer XD

“He-hello?” AJ sounded genuinely concerned for Sam lol

“Where did you go?” “the sea.” regrets it before the words are even out- XD

The way they both broke, shook for a few seconds, and then straightened in sync is insane

Its like a fricking switch was flipped holy shit- laughing- then suddenly sitting upright and focused again lol wow

Toms little giggling in the corner omfg-

“Are you getting off? Whe-where are you getting off?” He heard the joke and immediately corrected lmaooo

“Well, turn to page seven!” “Ahhh!” “Ahhh!!” the whole finger pointing and like “hahahaha i knew you'd say it you shit” is amazing and i adore it

“How old are you?” Has to clarify for the scene, i appreciate it sam lol

“32. How-how-” “okay.” “okay.” yeah maybe its better not to clarify sam’s age- seeing as hes been at sea for 60 years yet was clearly an adult when he wrote the book and- lets not get into it

“Im actually getting off at the next stop-” “mhumhmh” AJ and Tom’s little smiles at his dumbass joke ahhhh i love

Also- side note- his book gets off already at page seven??? Thats pretty early right? Or am i tweaking? Actually its a book about sex called Sexbook so nevermind, ignore me

“Im actually a writer myself.” “oh really? What have you written?” “big vagina 1, 2, 3.” Sam completely folds at that, and Tom’s little smile as AJ smirks, proud of himself ahhh such dorks :) 

“But i haven't- *breaks* i haven't released any yet because *voice shakes with laughter* im too afraid. *sam casually dying in the background trying not to laugh* Im too afraid of showing my work *breaks again* cause i will be judged.” The hand to the heart is truly my favorite thing XD

“Jemima.” Sam: *shit what was my name again* AJ: Arthur B. D. Sam: *thats right thank you* Arthur B. D. WOW!!! AJ remembered a name!!! Brilliant. 

Brilliant stagecraft of leaving the bus AJ, adore

Tom gets to be in a scene now! Yay!

“Boys…” Sam thought he could sit down and relax- nope! AJ is trying, but, yep he has to stand again too lol

Tom unbuttoning his shirt just to reveal a shirt underneath is a power move holy shit-

“As the united kingdom communist part we just cant take that.” Tom squints at him: mmmhmmm. *shakes head because he does not like that* Sam: *does it back equally as passive aggressive* mmmmmhhhmmm

“Us fine upstanding, british *lacking a very substantial british accent* communists that we are.” 

I see Tom is trying to revive Xavier???? Or smth…

“Oh what did you just stutter to me?” His strut-

AJ’s tongue in cheek smile as he approaches-

That chin tilt???????? Oh ma my my-

“How did you get my name so wrong?” ahh how quickly the mighty fall😔

“Magnus o. Puss.” AJ’s almost break at the name lmaooo

“Cause i have a full magnus full of o puss.” Sam’s breaking of character so completely that he just covers his face in shame lmaooo XD

“You just wiped your nose.” “Sorry.” “you're wearing a jumper.” wow tom- just insult everything about him i guess XD AJ: 😔sorry…

Aj trying to escape the scene. Tom: don't just sit down and cry! No mercy…XD

“Flatmate.” “oh!” AJ’s relief lmaooo

Tom: I’m the other flatmate. :/ keep trying buddy, one day you'll join the scene again lmaooo

“Get on the couch.” “how was your day?” “how was your day?” “how was your daaaay?” the way theyre actually sitting really close together with Tom almost leaning against Sam’s shoulder 🫠

“You know, my writing,” “We’re big fans.” Tom casually interrupts to clarify and support- and like- i know its for the scene and they’re building a really quick relationship- but AJ actually is a writer/director and they do actually watch his stuff-😭- anyway-

Sam and Tom’s continuous looks at each other “Oooooooh!”

“Its from your time.” THERE WE GO!!! SOME OLD JOKES!!!! “Oh yeah, just us two 65 year old women with our 32 year old flatmate!” lmaoooo they're all women and not one of them originally meant to be XD

“Well we were five.” “At first it didn't do much for us.” I would hope not Tom, but thanks for clarifying…

“As we matured-” “as we matured-” “Like our bible-” “like our bible-” im loving this casual repetition they have going on, wonderful

“It was spiritual but also exciting.” “like cocaine.” “like cocaine.” Sam would know… and still with the repetitions XD

“That would be convenient to the plot.” I love how Sam feels the need to say this aloud and not just subtly hint at it- because knowing the two idiots he’s on stage with- sorry, chaos demons- they would totally let him try to build it up like that, and then never actually get the plot going in that direction lmaooo

“Oh my gosh.” Sam and Tom both cracking at his gasp- now drum roll, will Aj stick to the plot or is he throwing in a curveball???

“Is it convenient to the plot?” Tom looks like he doesn't want it to be- just to annoy Sam lmaooo

“And i looked out the window temporarily-” *almost breaks* Aj- i love you, but there are more casual ways to let this further the plot, you know that right XD

“Well this sounds perfectly plausible.” After he and Tom just destroyed any way it could be plausible

“You've cracked my code did you?” we get a snippet of Aj’s delightful laughter, beautiful

“Pass the torch up. There you go.” AJ: *finger point of “clever”* lol

“You cant go off again back to sea.” “..okay.” AJ’s break at the easy agreement lol-

AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW i did not expect a cute hug scene!!!!!! Yay!!!! 🫠💗

Ok- i will be honest- i really though Aj was going in for a kiss at first- and i kind of believe Sam thought so too with the whole “i always wanted a daughter” to solidify its purely sweet and not romantic just in case aj gets any more ideas lol

Sam’s “oh!” and hunch drop into Big Dick because he thought he was Tom’s assistant??? And not big dick, but here he is again lmaooo

Tom’s little vibrating act made AJ fold and i think its wonderful XD

Tom climbing on a chair because he needs to be taller ofc, classic

“You could look, im not wearing underwear.” Sam, not only looking, but doing the appreciate, yeah head nod is crazy

“Im everything you fear.” AJ interrupting his build up to monologue to snort is priceless

“You were just a lowly intern-” Hang on a fucking minute sam- Tom is how old???? That was 60 years ago- i don't care how young and lowly he was- he was at least a teenager which makes him a seventy something yead old man- y'know what its better not to ask

“Even you couldn't… open it.” Tom freezing in place in an effort not to laugh, Sam’s head hanging in disappointment, and AJ just having the time of his life 

THEM GENUINELY JUST LETTING/MAKING AJ WRITE THE ENDING OF HIS SEX BOOK ON STAGE IS THE BEST AND CRAZIEST THING EVER WHAAAAAAAT

Tom’s little head drop forward like “what are you saying aj? Oh you're doing this? Okaaay…” 

“Penelope.” sam. Sam. sammy. Samuel. Its Jemima. 

“Im trapped in a vagina.” Tom, AJ, and Sam all cracking at the perfectly set up joke, classic

“How is he doing this?” Sam not helping at all and making AJ come up with it XD

“He says it just- hes a ghost.” AJ has given up lmaooo

“Astral penetration.” AJ BREAKING FULLY, FOLD ON STAGE, MID STAGE!!!!

“Magnum o, full stop, puss.” Sam checking his watch to see how much he has to speed this up lmaoooo

“Hell die inside of that vagina.” *both break* XD

“Im in my office on another floor…” Tom really wanted to be in the scene and they keep forcing him out XD

“Hes astral penetrated me-” Sam fully folds on stage too- he knew, he just knew AJ would make it weird- specifically made it so that they were established as daughter-dad relationship- and yet AJ still found a way LMAOOOO

“Don't make me call security.” “Call security! I don't care!” “Security.” “JA. I am secure.” Tom baby im just not sure thats what he meant XD

“Im just going to put this out there: we have several copies.” lmaooo Aj come on!

“But then your friend would die inside wouldn't he?” AJ: *HAHAH FUCK YOU!!!* “ahh fuck.” Sam is impressed lol

WHERE DID HE GET THE SWORD?????

[drenched exit] sam: awww come on! *disappointed as though he didn't help set it up*

[door closes with a moist SMACK] Tom: *smiles because hes proud of himself*

“You've been meditating inside a big member!” why do they keep making it worse better

[juicy splash] Sam: *makes sound of disgust and disappointment*

“Its perfectly natural!” You tell ‘em king!

Physic powers?????

“You-you've pinned it to the wall.” … aj… theres no emoji or anything to convey my expression rn, but i assume its the same as yours so… yeah…

“You must challenge him.” AJ: *breaks fully because he did not expect sam to just appear behind him while hes being tortured?? by a man rubbing his own nipples*

“Feel the tension!” i feel the tension alright😭

Aj having to laugh mid battle (real) because  w h a ha t???

What is going on😭😭😭

OH MY GOD WHAT???? SAM ESCAPED THE VAGINA????

pleasedontkisspleasedontkisspleasedontkisspleasedontkisspleasekisspleasekiss

“That vagina was so acidic.” Sam please don't say things like that while you're dying in AJ’s arms- XD

“Im so happy i met you on the bus that day.” You mean literally that morning?? Or did i miss a time jump?

“The big vagina 4. *moans*” Death. 

aj helping tom up from the floor😭🫠

AND, SCENE!!! wow. That was… wow. Ok. Um. So. If you couldn't tell, i got very distressed towards the end. Like very. It was very good though, kinda what i expected. I’m sad Luke isn't there but glad he wasn't because it would have been so much worse 😭 but uh. Yeah. that was fun! So… hope you enjoyed???

@snek-of-eden you were so right, the chaos is unmatched and wow. Thank you!!

@dawn-speckled

[ganondoodle]

i keep feeling the need to apologize for being so negative all the time, the truth is i am not satisfyed at all with anything i draw or write anymore, it feels bland and uninteresting like its lost anything that used to make it not so, i dont know how to change that, and the few people telling me otherwise are likely tired of it (i do not blame anyone even for a second)

'draw for yourself' really doesnt work for me, i cant not draw, despite trying that too, bc then theres nothing left to do, but i mainly draw bc i need to connect with people, show people stuff and see if they like it, see if i can bring something new to the table, it makes me feel less alone and like theres actual merit to what i do, like all these brainworms arent worthless, i havent actually lost my mind, .. not healthy but its how i have been hanging on for the last few years of my life

and i see im slowly losing everything on all ends, the stuff i post used to be what kept me afloat mentally while life is shit, but its all going downhill, and it has been for a while, im not blaming others for it, i know the problem is on my end, i just dont know how to solve it, its on me to make something interesting that compells people, not that they own anything to me, obviously, but i feel i lost everything that used to make things interesting, my brainworms have gotten old and boring, the slow speed and amateurish way i present stuff likely contributing to it to no small part

i hate disappointing or letting others down, i constantly feel like i am not delivering anything worthwhile, making promises i cant uphold to compensate, setting higher standards and expectations to myself to compensate, i need to be better, somehow, at some point i have to get better at it- theres also the guilt i feel for not being able to do anything for the people that keep being nice regardless, i need to do extra good for them! i have to make it up to them! make it worthwhile for them at least bc if anyone deserves it it is them!

its a self perpetuating downwards spiral, ironically enough, i know talking negatively all the time is annoying and is only making it all even worse, its alienating even more people, understandibly so, but my eternal problem is not being able to shut up, i cant pretend to be happy, sure, but i cant even shut up about it, so here i am being annoying about it once again

im running out of time on all ends of my life happy 28 birthday to me, how did i even make it this far

[teethcake]

jeffy woods in my 2024?!?!

[meggeradraws]

my silly part 2 to this! I love post dsod kaiba corp bonus!

[okartichoke]

ace avian. that’s what we’re calling this 🗣️🗣️🗣️

please let me know if you have any thoughts or suggestions or input or anything! i’m happy to bounce ideas around (i'll post DL-6 someday soon i swear)

link to masterpost || explations below cut

shoutout to the anon who sent in that ask bc i seriously fell in love with blue jay phoenix. SHOUTOUT TO TAKAHE PHOENIX TOO THO takahe phoenix, you will forever be in my heart and im glad you existed <3333,, (maybe in this au he’s got some loving adoptive takahe parents :3) (YKNOW WHAT YEAH that’s canon now)

but yeah, flight-avoidant jay phoenix still lends itself well to the common-man hardworking underdog vibe i want from him. speaking of flight-avoidant...

Phoenix's relationship with flying:

It's a bit complicated. Basically, Phoenix can fly, but he historically chooses not to. From the lack of any practice, he's an INCREDIBLY weak flier. (That hovering is really all he can manage)

For one, he's still afraid of heights. Can't help that. This fear means he was less inclined to practice flying, which made him a weaker flier. And being a weaker flier, in turn, made his fear of heights worse. And so on, in a loop. With flightless parents too (it's canon now it's canon), there's even less of a reason to learn to fly. At some point, not flying might've even become something he stuck with out of stubbornness lol, knowing Phoenix.

(I will soon be making a couple small world building posts, but) flying isn't necessary to get around in their society. Convenient, sure, but Phoenix realized he could make do without, and so he did. Phoenix, you icon. Slay. 💅💅

i know this probably isn't the popular take with wing AUs??, but Phoenix being flightless (or at least semi-flightless) sounded like a really fun take on the idea to me. His name is irony at its peak. I also look forward to exploring how other characters react to him not flying. The prosecutors are going to have so many cheap insult opportunities.

As I mentioned though, he still uses his wings a LOT, though. He's much more emotive with them than most people. His sarcastic inner-dialogue remarks are also betrayed by his wings lmao

I also imagine bird-folk never really invented bikes (riding would just be annoying with their wings, plus bikes aren't fast/efficient enough to outweigh just flying), so instead, Phoenix gets around on a little wing-powered scooter device (like scootaloo lol) (they're usually made for children who can't fly yet, but Phoenix still uses one)

finally, wow, stellar jay’s are quite literally just phoenix wright as a bird lmao? color scheme, hair, it’s uncanny. give it a pink tie and it just is Phoenix Wright, i used a blue jay since they’ve got a bit more striking wings but wow.

(ty again for the support and for reading my essay ! :3)

one more thing, but @kora-kat YES YES YES this. ^^^^ omg THIS. this is still true even though he's a jay now.

[gingermaple]

nightmare blunt rotation

[wasyago]

not drawing for others. not drawing for myself either. playing video games. okay? yay

[cheatingtime]

randomly wanted to try drawing longer hairstyles on jimmy

[salt-n-salt]

yes I am STILL thinking abt haley’s winter fit

[xxplastic-cubexx]

eternally grateful that no matter the verse within cherik either one of them will always have long lushish hair the other can lovingly comb through

[iilmunchkiin]

Just saw an absolutely amazing post that convinced me that Ceroba would be the one who confesses first.

(op turned turned off reblogs unfortunately so I'm making this post (┬┬﹏┬┬)) ("Just put the link to the post here-" No, you absolute buffoon, they turned it off for a reason and I'm going to respect that) (also potential rambling?? again??) (future LM here, yep there is alot of rambling. this was supposed to be a character analysis but I accidentally made a fic halfway LMAOAOAOAOAOA )

god I'm a sucker for slow burn and angst (duh, you all know that) I used to think that Starlo wouldn't be able to take it anymore and finally get the balls to confess to her, he goes up to her and it'll be the usual cheesy but wholesome moment with him nervously laughing, Ceroba getting surprised so she turns away while brushing off some hair that got on her face, Starlo sheepishly rubbing the back of his head and stuttering to get the words out. It'll all be planned of course he's a gentleman, he's just so stupidly nice and understanding that if Ceroba just flat out tells him "I don't wanna be in a romantic relationship with you" I just know he's going to smile and tell her it's okay and he'd still be there for her and it won't affect their friendship at all and he's going to stay by her side de jashdkahsd sorry the brainworms are doing the thing again.

Of course the idea of Ceroba confessing first also came into my mind, her realizing she's in love with Starlo but now has to fight the guilt thinking that she's "betraying/cheating on Chujin" made the little angsty gremlin in me giggle but I just preferred it would be Starlo who breaks the ice just for shittles and giggles (I like seeing him get all blushy and shy HIHIHIHIH). Also adding the fact that Ceroba DID consider getting together with him but she brushes it off cuz she thinks he's still too immature. (Yes I am aware Ceroba acknowledges Starlo growing up in True Pacifist but I didn't give it that much thought I was in delulu land)

But then I saw the post and ho h my god oh my goddddddd.....

I was a fool

Starlo is aware of what Ceroba has gone through and as her childhood best friend he would respect her and not risk overwhelming her with a confession cuz OF COURSE HE WOULDNT, and if he DID consider confessing it would be YEARS after the whole "Clover-sacrificing-themselves-for-the-futue-of-monsterkind" ordeal but he would have probably fallen out of love at this point and it would go

⭐: "OH YEAH btw I had a crush on you when we were kids" 🦊: "HUH"

(not dismissing the chance he could still be in love with her despite that I mean he's dedicated and loyal and so damn devoted to her it makes sense, it was just had a funny thought giggles)

But then after reading the post, it reopened the idea of Ceroba confessing first and... oh my god it was glorious. It would start small, thinking he looked nice one day, subconsciously gazing at him and adoring him at the distance as he talks his usual nonsense at the saloon with the feisty 5, wanting to hang out with him a little more than usual, until it slowly builds up over time. She starts noticing the little things about him, his wide smile, the sound of his voice and the laughter he makes when he does his usual shenanigans with her in post-pacifist where things are starting to get brighter as they heal together, she would call him an idiot but god he would just smile at her again and the little dimples on the sides of his face would make her melt without knowing and she swears she felt her face get warm but brushes it off, thinking it's nothing. But that's where the snowball keeps getting bigger, she would see him talking to the folk again at the saloon and wish it was her he was laughing with, she'll quickly snap out of it, shake her head a little and think about how weird it was for her to have thought about that. She'd find herself beaming when he calls her name and feel so stupid for doing so, "Why am I so happy all of a sudden? He says my name all the time..."

And the snowball finally crashes when they have one of those talks, y'know the ones where you usually have at 3 am with your friends? Just talking about life in general, talking about the future, what are each of them scared of, what they feel and what they think about things, just being so vulnerable and open with each other. They've had their fair share of these talks but today was different. He looked absolutely stunning, despite being mentally exhausted he still looked divine, the way his eyes droop when his expression softens, the slow rise and fall of his chest when he sighs, his wide glistening smile turning into a small and soft curl on his lips. She can't help herself but make subtle touches and discreetly brush her shoulder against his as they lean towards the railings of the balcony, fighting the urge to just reach out and figure out small ways to make contact with him. She gazes at him the entire time, analyzing him, noticing all the little changes he makes, why can't she look away? She can't, she tried, so many times but it still ends up with her looking at him again trying to burn the image of him in her mind, wanting to leave it there forever. When the talk comes to a close, he turns to her and offers a hug, she accepts it and the moment he melts into her arms, she feels a sudden warmth on her chest and it instantly scatters around her entire body, enveloping her. They share each other's warmth, she slowly buries her face onto his shoulder, cherishing this small moment with him as they hold each other tight in each other's embrace. She's closing her eyes, inhaling his scent, it feels like she's in a dream, she doesn't want this moment to end, she doesn't wanna wake up just yet but.... They break a part, he gives her his goodbyes. As she goes home she lays in bed, face up, staring at the ceiling as she recalls everything that happened to her, putting pieces of the puzzle together as she finally comes to terms with herself and gets hit with the realization. It all comes crashing down to her, her eyes widen and she lets out an audible groan. She lays in silence for a moment, feeling absolute agony for being so stupid, she peaks through her fingers and looks back up the ceiling again, "Fuck..."

I haven't even dabbled with what goes on in her head after she accepts this fact, the sudden guilt consuming her, feeling like she betrayed Chujin, the person she loved with her entire soul only to fall for another. She hates it. And if she confesses she's going to be a wreck and Starlo just instantly goes to comfort her, telling her it's okay, she doesn't have to force herself to confess to h- No. She wants this, she's absolutely in love, he may have fallen first but she fell even harder, but with so much conflict in her mind, wanting to hold his hand without the weight on her shoulders pulling her back. The entire time they're together, Starlo finds the time to console her, comfort her, feeling horrible for making him stay up late just for her but he says he doesn't mind and he himself wants this, feeling absolutely honored to have her in her arms and that she trusts him so much that she's just so open and vulnerable and he's being so kind and patient to her I hate them I HATE THEM I FFUCKING HATE THUEJN R F FUCK FUCKF FFIFUUCJCC N I HATE THEMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

thE SLOW BURN IS SO SLOW BUT KEEP UP AND SET THE KITCHEN IN FLAMES PLEASE RAUGHHH

SAVE ME STAROBA W AS SAV VE MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

TL;DR: uhhhh read a post and it convinced me that Ceroba slowly falls in love with Starlo over time without realizing it and when she finally does she feels really guilty cuz it feels like she's betraying Chujin, the slow burning is burning and the angst is scrumptious. Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk. /j

[healpimp]

im gonna level w you, fellow medic mains. you are a lot worse at the game than you think