#but never in the way that would be obvious or literal

[beloveds-embrace]

Wingless!Reader and Harpy!Gaz MY BELOVEDS!!!! She thinks she’s lost this thing that’s so crucial to her identity, so she must be unlovable now, and all he can think of is how amazing she is. Does she take a while to realize he’s hitting on her, or does he make it obvious immediately?

Short answer: it’d take her a while to accept that he is actually hitting on her! Thank you to @lostintransist, @sexc-snail, @ms-sasa, and @cod-z’s conversation for giving me inspiration for the long answer:

You hadn’t noticed him at first- not really.

It wasn’t like you expected to see another harpy in your small, isolated town. Not here, where the skies seemed too vast and empty, and you could pretend your feet had always been meant to kiss the earth instead of the wind. You liked it that way- liked the absence of feathers and sharp eyes that might rake over empty span of your back. You liked the illusion of anonymity.

At least, that’s what you told yourself.

But the illusion shattered the moment Kyle “Gaz” Garrick walked into your life.

You’d seen him before, of course- him and the rest of his team. They were hard to miss, their sheer presence enough to bend the air around them, predatory in a way that set all your instincts on edge. That aside, it was hard not to notice newcomers immediately, and it was your neighbors that told you about them first. Anout him.

Gaz, though… He wasn’t sharp edges and thunder like the others. He was soft winds and dusky skies, his gaze steady but warm. Even so, you hadn’t lingered long enough to catch the subtle flutter of wings beneath his jacket, hadn’t realized what he was until it was too late to pretend not to see him.

Now, standing in the market square with the autumn breeze tugging at his dark curls, Kyle was unmistakable.

A harpy.

His eyes found yours almost immediately. He didn’t flinch. Didn’t blink.

You did. You dropped your gaze and turned away, pulse pounding and pretending like what harpy left in you didn’t want to chirp and seek him out to meet him proper.

The social instincts were easier to curb with no other harpies around.

It took days for you to stop feeling the weight of that look- curious, searching, too focused for comfort. It was worse when you saw him again, and again after that, his paths seeming to cross yours no matter how you tried to avoid him. Always the same glance, steady and unreadable. Always the same tug low in your stomach that you hated yourself for feeling.

You didn’t want his attention.

You didn’t want to see the moment his eyes shifted, when recognition would bloom into pity or horror or, worse, disgust.

And yet he never looked away, even when you knew he must have understood by now that you are wingless.

You were restocking shelves in the little general store you worked at when he finally cornered you- not literally, but it certainly felt like it. The bell above the door had chimed, and you’d looked up instinctively, only to freeze when you saw him there.

“Hey.” His voice was warm and crooning. Friendly. But there was a weight behind it too, something that made your feathers- what was left of them- prickle beneath your skin.

You murmured a polite greeting and turned back to your task. Maybe he’d take the hint. Hopefully.

He didn’t.

“Not many of us around here,” he said, like it was casual conversation. Like it didn’t make your stomach twist into tight knots, ash coating the back of your throat where there should’ve been excited tweets and chirps.

You swallowed hard, and yet the taste lingered. “No.”

The silence stretched; not offensive, not choking. Simply there.

“I’m Kyle.” He tried again, gentler this time though you still didn’t look at him.

“I know who you are.” Your voice came out rougher than you meant, but you didn’t soften it. You couldn’t afford to.

Please go away.

He didn’t seem fazed. If anything, he simply chuckled, and the sound was so nice. “Small town things, huh? And you are?”

“Busy.”

That, finally, gave him pause. You felt his gaze sweep over you, not sharp this time, but careful. Calculating. Like a hawk.

“You don’t have to talk to me,” he said after a moment, and there was no offense in it, just understanding. “But I’d like it if you did.”

You didn’t know why that made something in your chest ache.

You wanted to snap at him, tell him to leave you alone, but the words died before you could force them out. Instead, you turned and met his gaze properly for the first time.

You braced for it- for his eyes to drop, for his expression to change.

It didn’t.

He just looked at you, steady as ever, and then he smiled.

He kept showing up after that encounter.

He was persistent in a way that wasn’t quite pushy, but left you no room for retreat. He showed up everywhere, always lingering at the edges of your space like he was waiting for an invitation you never gave. Sometimes he bought things from the store where you worked, even when it was obvious he didn’t need them. Other times he just passed by, pausing long enough to offer a nod or a smile, feathers fluffing out ever so slightly, before continuing on his way.

He never asked about your lack of wings.

He didn’t need to.

You caught him watching you sometimes, his gaze lingering just a moment too long before he looked away. But there was no pity in it, no revulsion. Just… interest. Curiosity. Like he was trying to figure you out.

You hated how much it made your heart race.

The first gift appeared on your doorstep after a bad storm.

It was a feather- deep brown with pale golden tips, sleek and perfect. A molted primary. Harpy wings didn’t shed often, and when they did, the feathers were treasured. Given, and never discarded.

You stared at it for a long time before picking it up, your fingers trembling. No. Was this a cruel joke? A mockery?

But harpies didn’t gift feathers lightly. It wasn’t just a token, it would never be used for a joke. It was a claim. A courtship.

You told yourself it couldn’t be from him, even if he was the only other harpy in town.

But when you saw Gaz later that day, his eyes flicked briefly to your hand where you still clutched the feather like it might disappear if you let it go. His mouth curved in the faintest of smug smiles before he turned and walked away, wings lax and fluffy; happy.

(Un)surprisingly, it didn’t stop there.

A polished stone one day, smooth and dark and heavy in your palm, made its home on your windowsill proudly. A sprig of rosemary the next, tucked into a small bundle of herbs tied with twine left with a basket of hunted game. Little things, carefully chosen, left where you’d be sure to find them.

You should have given them back. Should have told him to stop.

But you didn’t. Couldn’t, didn’t want him to.

You kept them, every single one. And still denied anything related to the idea of courting.

The first time he touched you, it was an accident. Or so you led yourself to believe.

You’d been hauling a heavy crate in the back room of the store when you slipped, hissing as pain flared along your shoulder. Before you could steady yourself, his hands were on you- gentle but firm, catching you before you could fall.

“Careful, love.” He murmured, his breath warm against your ear.

You froze.

It wasn’t just his touch; it was the way he leaned in, close enough that his wings brushed your arm, soft feathers ghosting over your skin. Harpies didn’t touch wings lightly. It was intimate, deliberate.

You stepped back quickly, your pulse hammering like a hummingbird. “I’m fine, Kyle.”

He didn’t move, dark eyes searching yours and wings still brushing over your skin like the calls of a siren. “Are you?”

You hated how much you wanted to lean back into him, when you finally pull yourself away with the excuse of having work to do. His eyes followed you regardless, and you pretended not to hear his pleased croon.

The first time you let him close, it wasn’t an accident.

You were walking home after sunset, shadows long and creeping. The streets felt too empty, too quiet. You told yourself you were imagining things- the prickle at the back of your neck, the feeling of being watched. But harpy senses were never wrong, even ones wingless-

Then you saw them.

Three men leaning against the alley wall, eyes sharp and predatory. Not hybrids- just humans- but that didn’t make them any less dangerous.

You didn’t stop. Didn’t look at them. But they stepped into your path anyway, smiles sharp as knives.

“Not in the mood,” you kept your voice steady, sighing in the quiet confines of your mind.

They didn’t move.

Before you could react, a shadow loomed behind you, cutting through the dim light; Kyle, wings spread wide and threating behind him.

He didn’t say a word. Didn’t have to.

The men took one look at him- the sharp line of his jaw, the broad set of his shoulders, the feathers flaring at his back- and decided they wanted no part of him. They melted away into the night, quick and silent, and in no time they were simple specks of forgotten dust.

You let out a shaky breath, wrapping your arms around yourself as you turned to look at him. Despite the unpleasant encounter, he looed handsome like this, lip curled in disgust, jaw tight, brows furrowed.

Stupid thoughts.

“You okay?” Kyle asked, voice low. He kept looking around, on the look out in case anyone else tried their luck with you, and he hummed when he saw you nod.

You hadn’t realized it until now, but his hands were on your waist, tight but not enough to cause you any pain. You.. couldn’t bring yourself to ask him to let go, and so his hands lingered there.

Not too long- just enough for the heat of his touch to settle beneath your skin, warm and steady. Just enough for his thumbs to brush once, barely there, before he let go at last.

He didn’t step back, though.

“Come on,” he said, voice softer now, one wing open around you back like a shield. “I’ll walk you home, love.”

You didn’t argue. Couldn’t, not when the memory of sharp eyes and sharper smiles still clung to the edges of your thoughts. You nodded again, and when his wing brushed your arm- closer than any harpy should have dared- you didn’t flinch away.

Not this time.

You tell yourself you should have stopped it there.

Should have put some distance between you and Kyle before you let yourself sink any deeper than you’ve already allowed, but you didn’t.

You let him linger, let him watch you, let him keep leaving those little gifts like offerings. You let him walk you home when the streets grew dark and the wind grew cold, his wings always flaring slightly- protective, claiming. You invite him in, sometimes, longing for company yet unable to admit it to yourself.

And maybe that was the worst part.

Because some part of you- some buried, broken part that still ached for the wind and the skies- wanted to be claimed. Wanted the safety and warmth he offered so freely, even when you didn’t think you deserved it.

Especially then.

The next gift was the one that broke you.

You’d thought you’d grown used to them by now- the feathers, the stones, the herbs tied with twine. Small things. Careful things.

But this time, it wasn’t small.

It was a cloak.

Dark and soft, lined with feathers- harpy feathers. His feathers. Feathers that gleamed gold and brown, sleek and perfect. Feathers meant for flight; the same feathers that protected you, that stayed with you.

He’d given them to you.

His feathers.

The thought kept looping in your mind, loud and clear.

Your hands trembled as you touched the edge of the cloak, and you barely noticed when the door creaked open.

Kyle stepped inside, and his eyes softened the moment they landed on you. “Fits you, darling.” He said, low and warm as a setting sun.

“I can’t take this, Kyle.” You whispered, a deep ache attempting to burrow its way into the soft, vulnerable space between your ribs.

“Yes, you can.”

You looked up, and his gaze caught you, steady and unyielding. The ache melted away.

“Kyle-”

“It’s yours, honey.” He stepped closer, his wings shifting. “You’re mine.”

The words hit like a blow, but before you could retreat, he kept going.

“You think I don’t see it?” Kyle’s voice dropped, something raw and aching curling beneath it. “You think I don’t know? I don’t care about your wings, love. Never did. They do not make me think any less of you.”

You flinched, but he didn’t stop there.

He reached out, pulling you into the cocoon of his arms and wing. “You’re still a harpy. Still strong. Still you. Still the loveliest birdie I’ve ever seen.” His grip tightened, just slightly, and he hooked his chin over your head. “You’re not broken.”

Your throat closed.

He must have noticed, because his voice softened further, almost pleading.

“Let me keep you safe. Let me stay.”

You couldn’t breathe.

And yet, when his hand slipped down to tangle with yours, you didn’t pull away.

[1-rain-1]

That picture looks like someone took 7 JPEGs of the moon and rotated them. I thought I was being told "The moon's upsidedown in Australia 😜" but apparently it actually is??

The fact itself isn't particularly profound but has caught me wildly off guard and changed how I intuit planet Earth. Existential ramblings below the cut.

I mean, it's obvious right? We do live on a big 3D circle and define our up as (roughly) perpendicular to its surface after all. It's almost the same as looking at the moon while standing on your head. Almost. ‘Cause when you go to the Southern Hemisphere the trees also do a little hand stand and I guess in my mind there was no meaningful distinction between the trees and the Moon so I figured it should also continue to share my up. It's like I saw the moon as a part of my environment just like the stuff I physically interact with every day. As if it were bound to the same dirt as us.

We rely a lot on having a shared and consistent up. To have otherwise is an aberration. You might lose it if you're confused or in freefall but things fall from the sky towards the dirt everywhere. Sure everyone knows that compared to the Southern Hemisphere the Northern is literally upside down but we also know that when you actually go there everything is rightside up. The change in up was academic and distant. Noticed by a navigator's sextant or an astronomers telescope but not roads or buildings or dogs. Winter may be summer now but nothing is visibly reoriented. Why would the Moon be any different? It might live much higher than the trees and even the clouds but it's still in the sky.

Except you just need to look up to hear it say "You have traveled in ways you will never feel and only I know". and if you're very lucky, and listen very closely that little gray circle will whisper "I am a sphere, Earth is a sphere, and I am far, far away"

Are you aware the moon phases you drew are incorrect? Your waxing phases are actually waning. Just wanted to let you know in case you didn’t know

UM akshually it depends on which side of the hemisphere you’re viewing it from🤓

[dogwithrabies]

【★】 Wanderer SFW and NSFW headcanons

【☆】 Bullet list format with some scenarios included. Written with a gender neutral reader in mind but has a AFAB anatomy section at the end, word count: 2.7k

honestly, i could go on forever, there's so much i love about him i could never fit it in one post.

This is not proof read!

Starting off with the fact that it would probably take him SO long to realize he’s caught feelings and even longer to accept them. It’s a ridiculous predicament he’s found himself in. The Wanderer is a yearner at heart, but he also carries a huge amount of baggage.

Realistically?

It’d take him years.

And even after he’s sort of accepted it, it won’t be smooth sailing. It’s still complicated for him, yes, he likes you, now what? You make him feel all sorts of things and it’s so frustrating. 

He always finds himself making excuses to linger around you, and even then he acts like willingly spending time with you is some sort of atrocious torture. Always complaining and huffing. You don’t take it to heart as it’s very evident this is just a self-imposed hostage situation, he could leave anytime he wants; he simply chooses not to.

So you decide to spare him and not call him out on it (for now).

Despite yearning and wanting, he has no intention of making the first move. It gets to the point that it’s painfully obvious to anyone around him that he’s got a soft spot for you. But he won’t budge, even if the traveler or Buer tease him relentlessly.

It’s sort of his last resort, if you don’t reciprocate his feelings then he can rationalize it as another instance of the human nature disappointing him. Just another reminder to not trust again.

Alas, it all flies out the window the moment you (metaphorically or literally) corner him. It’s kind of funny how little resistance he puts up, despite his aversion to touch he never pushes you away (another example of his favoritism).

Pretend to fix his hair out of his face, play with the ornaments of his clothes, accidentally sit too close to him, it all leads up to the moment where everything escalates. 

Grab him by the waist and drag him close to you, tease him with what you know he craves just to let go. It’s an utterly unnecessary dance around the obvious but his reactions are just too cute, the way his face turns an absurd red color while he fights his hands from reaching and holding onto you.

Frustrating.

(note: overdoing it will make him think you’re just toying with him, he already feels like some sort of pathetic damsel in distress in this predicament, so please spare him).

He tries to psych himself up to reciprocate your touches (or do the unspeakable, initiate them), he always chickens out at the last second, but this time, his hands move faster than his brain can think and he finds himself pulling you back in.

It’s instant regret that fills him as he cringes at his own behavior but you quickly shut it down by kissing him.

It’s messy and unpracticed on his end, and it even took him a second to process it and reciprocate.

The label of your relationship is never stated outloud, you’ve been chasing each other for so long that it goes unspoken.

He starts inviting himself in your spaces now, the kiss left him with a whole new level of yearning. He never outright tells you what he wants, instead, he leaves a trail of undecipherable hints.

The sound of scribbling of pens and shuffling of papers fills the air as you work away at some unimportant receipts. He sits behind, you boring holes in your back by the amount of glaring he’s been doing. He’s here, he’s available, and you’re completely ignoring him in favor of wasting his time on some frivolous documents.

When he scoffs for the nth time you finally grace him of your attention.

“What?”

He’s almost caught off guard when you acknowledge him, quickly regaining his composure to shoot a glare at you.

Okay, so it’s another challenge of his.

One that he hopes you’ll pick up, because why be upfront with his desires when he can just throw at you a puzzle and watch you struggle to solve it? (one that he himself wants you to solve, and fast, don’t make him wait).

You calculate your options, ignore him until he gets so frustrated he confronts you (or leaves), or up him at his own game.

So you make a show of getting up from your spot and plopping down next to him, so close you’re squishing yourself in his side. He looks at you with a puzzled look as you embrace him with one arm, pulling him close and ensuring he doesn’t try to make a run for it.

“What’s wrong, my dear Wanderer?”

“Nothing’s wrong.” He responds bitterly, refusing eye contact, the slight red on his face betrays him. Cute.

“Awh”, you move your arm down to his waist, “I’m sorry I neglected you, how can I make up for it?” Your tone almost hints at something more suggestive, he wants to shoot back with a snarky remark but he’s so out of his depth that he just stares at you.

He wants, he craves, but…

You let out a breathy laugh, “If you want something from me, you should just tell me.” You finish the sentence with a kiss on his cheek and start retreating to get up, but he stops you.

“Stay.” He looks conflicted, like he’s fighting himself to speak up.

“Okay,” you sit back down and face him. “What else?”

“...Kiss me again.”

And you oblige.

The progress is slow, but it’s there. His selfishness will always win.

It can be insanely difficult to navigate sometimes, you’re the first human he willingly subjected himself to romantically and just the thought of sharing you with other people is gut wrenching. The way people look at you when you’re out and about, the friendly touches and hugs, it all just drives him a little bit insane.

He hates feeling like this. It’s those times he disappears for hours, just mellowing in his own feelings.

It takes a LOT of reassurance, he wouldn’t outright tell you but it’s sort of obvious. Lots of (involuntary) tears. He wants to trust you, but his emotional walls are incredibly thick.

With time, he improves a lot. He has taken his whole redemption seriously, he wants to be better and be better for you.

You showed him he can rely on you, and trust you. It’s a very scary trust fall for him, but you’re there to catch him.

He goes from reminding you of a tiny feral cat, constantly hissing and hiding to the cutest little kitten. Get domesticated, idiot.

Additional stuff:

He doesn’t do PDA, but won’t stop you from holding his arm or hand.

His love language is definitely acts of service, he loves doing things for you. He cooks, he cleans, he’s a house wife in denial.

For him, words of affirmation and physical touch. He loves it when you hold him, tell him how much you love him and whisper corny sweet nothings to him.

Skin to skin contact is very soothing to him. It doesn’t have to be sexual. he just wants to feel you.

He’s a little spoon, again, loves being held.

His favorite spots to kiss you are on the corner of your lips and forehead.

NSFW starts here:

He is, what one could call, a virgin. lol.

In his pursuit of divinity, he had no time or intention of getting distracted in engaging that way with humans. He knows what that activity entails, he just never had an interest in it. Until now, when he met you.

It’s that sort of unique situation that only a four hundred year old puppet could find itself in, four centuries of self imposed abstinence thrown out the window the moment you pop up. It starts innocuous enough that he can rationalize it as simple curiosity, but before he can realize it, it all spirals out of control.

He’s spent long sleepless nights trying to ignore the very obvious tent in his shorts. He never had the inclination to masturbate before, he tried to ignore it the first times, waiting it out staring at the ceiling until he had enough peace of mind to rest a bit.

And then you appear in his dreams. He is beyond frustrated now, how dare you infest his mind even when he’s unconscious? And so he finds himself reaching down to free his aching erection out of his shorts. He doesn’t want to, but maybe if he gives his body what it wants he can finally move on. He grabs himself with very inexperienced hands and tries to get it over with as fast as possible.

Images of you pop in his mind, he wants to be ashamed of where his thoughts are going but he finds it incredibly hard to when every picture of you makes him twitch and leak in his fist. He wishes it were your hands instead of his stroking him to completion, but perhaps it would be too much for him, and just the mere thought of that makes him spill on himself, making a mess of his hands and shorts.

Utterly shameful.

With you in the picture, he just doesn’t have the will to deny himself any longer.

He wants your hands on him, bite him, or scratch him he doesn’t care as long as they’re on him. He doesn't want you to know how desperate he is, but it’s kind of impossible to hide how hard he gets every time you hold him and kiss him.

You make the first move, dragging him onto your lap and sneaking your hands on his thighs. He wants to complain about your man-handling, but your hands are teasingly close to his bulge. A tiny voice in his head is screaming at him to leave, save whatever little dignity he had left and not engage in “filth”. But he’s also thinking with his other head, and he blames you for it, so why don’t you do your due diligence and take care of it?

He’s already squirmy and you haven’t even started. He’s used to pain, to harsh hits and blows, but you cradle him so delicately and he doesn’t know how to act.

He’s imagined this scene several times, your hands on him, stroking him to completion, but he’s woefully unprepared for the actual thing. Your hands are impossibly soft, spreading his pre-cum on his whole length to facilitate the movement.

He wants it to last forever but he finishes embarrassingly fast, making a mess of your hands and clothing. 

You figure this is the end of your first sexual encounter with him, but he never softens in your hand. Yeah, puppet stamina be like that.

Additional stuff:

He’s a whimperer.

He wasn’t even aware he had the ability to ejaculate. He still thinks of it as an utterly useless feature. But he’s also somewhat glad he can, he likes seeing you covered in his spend. 

Also, since it’s artificial he’s shooting blanks. There’s no need for protection.

He doesn’t have refractory periods. He does get sensitive after a climax but he’s immediately ready to go again.

He’s a switch, more leaning on the submissive side. He does have a dominant streak in him, it’s mostly when he’s feeling more possessive, he starts acting on it once he’s more confident.

Kissing gets heated quickly with him. He’s very eager to stick his tongue in your mouth.

He’s very good with his hands and mouth, you had to guide him through it the first times. He’s inexperienced but very dedicated and a fast learner.

Being inside you is his favorite thing. Alongside cumming inside you.

Exploring the sexual side of a relationship can be tricky, and his constitution does make it harder. It’s a long process of trial and error. He also, in the span of 400 years, never bothered to figure out his turn-ons/offs, just to add an additional layer of difficulty to the whole ordeal.

You do know of his past position of power, so it’s no wonder he likes being serviced. Ride him, suck him off, it’s all good to him. He loves how sweet you are to him, taking him so gently.

Despite his doll joints being no longer visible, he still presents seams on his torso. The whole area is very sensitive, kind of an unconventional erogenous zone, but you work with it. He also has very sensitive nipples. He’s a bit sheepish about that.

Speaking of unconventional, he has a thing for choking. He doesn’t need to breathe, so it’s not the lack of air that gets him so ecstatic, it’s more of the act per se.

Marking, he loves hickeys, and his bodysuit covers his neck area so others seeing them is not an issue. Loves being bitten. Not the soft munches, he wants to feel your teeth breaking the skin. He’s been hurt before, to unimaginable extents, to the point where he almost started craving that pain. To have you bite and scratch him in such a carnal and vulnerable context immediately drives him over the edge.

Despite his masochistic tendencies, he’s not willing to do the same to you. He’s sturdy, you couldn’t injure him no matter how hard you tried. But you’re human. He knows from first hand experience how fragile your kind is.

Risk play is off the table, and so is any sort of public/exhibitionism. Alone and secluded in the woods? Sure. But nothing of the sort where people can see. This won’t save him from having embarrassing hard ons in public, sometimes just your presence is enough to get him bricked up. He just won’t act on it.

He has a mean streak, he loves teasing you, edging you, and pushing you to your limits. However, he cannot take even a bit of teasing. he immediately breaks and starts begging you to let him cum.

He’s a crier in bed, it’s cathartic for him.

Has an oral fixation. It works out great for you, he loves using his mouth on you.

His favorite part of you is your thighs. If you let him, he’d spend hours shoving his cock between them. Don’t get him wrong, nothing compares to being inside you, but something about being able to feel you twitch as he fucks himself through the softness of your thighs just does it for him.

Lastly, hear me out pleaseplease

Peg him.

He’ll be a bit put off by it initially.

He’s just never heard of it before. Isn't it supposed to be the other way around?

You decide to put away the strap-on for the time being, starting with the basics as to not overwhelm him. Just fingers. You find out he has a completely functional prostate, and it’s your new way of tormenting him.

Don’t let him touch himself, instead, work him ever so slowly to his orgasm by spreading him on your fingers. He wants to be annoyed, to tell you that it’s useless and it’s just faster to let him do the fucking, but he’s hard, and leaking, twitching every time your fingers intentionally brush against that spot, and before long he’s shooting ropes all over his chest.

He’s still a bit fussy about it when you show him the toy you bought just for him. Because there’s no way that thing is going inside him, except it is, and he’s ashamed of liking every second of it.

AFAB anatomy section:

He’s a bit embarrassed of it at first, but he really likes your chest. He likes lying on them, he’ll fall asleep like that if you let him. His hands are always on them, kneading them around or just to feel you.

When you proposed to let him fuck your tits, he had no idea it was a thing. He likes the idea, in theory, when it comes to practice you get to find out just how much he really likes it.

He’s leaking so much it makes him practically slide around in them.

It’s not long before he finds himself covering your chest in cum.

It quickly becomes one of his favorite spots to cum on.

[liketolaugh-writes]

Re: the Fenton Parents-

The thing is, it's not abusive to be just... sort of okay at parenting. It is not abusive to be unable to stop your kid from behaving erratically, to not be able to figure out what's wrong, to not be able to stop your kid from lying to you and sneaking out of the house. They tried! They spend several episodes trying, which is, frankly, a lot of screentime for a 45-episode series (movies excluded)! They just were never able to figure out what was wrong.

(If you're curious: S1E7, S1E17, S2E9, and S3E3 all center around plotlines where the Fenton parents make an active effort to connect with their kids... and that's leaving out episodes where it's merely a major element and not half the plot.)

(It's also not neglectful to assume that a man showing an inappropriate interest in a married adult woman is probably not inappropriately interested in a teenage boy, especially when Danny hasn't said anything. That would frankly be a really weird assumption to make, and it only seems obvious to us because... we already know.)

You can say that they never showed the Fentons taking Danny to the hospital after his accident... but we also aren't shown that they didn't do that. We know nothing about the immediate aftermath of the accident. Stupid Desiree reality-warp episode aside.

It never said that they knew about Danny's accident... it also never said that they didn't. (Personally, I think that it would be super out of character for Jazz to know and not tell them, regardless of whether or not they're neglectful? Jazz, like Danny, has faith in them.)

You can say that we didn't see how the Fentons fed their kids when the food in the house was contaminated... but we also never heard that they didn't do that. There was not a word about missing meals, not even from Jazz.

Do I think the Fentons were abusive?

The simple answer: yes!

The complex answer: But not in any of the ways I usually see depicted.

The thing is- the thing is, I think that the only thing the Fentons did that was genuinely abusive - not just a mistake, not just they could have done better - is their godawful lab safety. That is where they knew better, knew what they were doing was wrong, and did it anyway. The house wasn't safe and that was entirely on them, and danger on that level is criminally neglectful.

But that's a very unusual profile. It's not that they didn't care enough about their kids. It's not that they didn't pay attention to their children, or that they prioritized their work over their family, or that they neglect their responsibilities. (For God's sake, they go to multiple parent-teacher conferences! Jack chaperoned a dance he didn't remember agreeing to attend! Maddie woke up in the middle of the night, not yet knowing there were ghosts around, and immediately went to find Danny!)

They were just, quite literally, criminally irresponsible, which is a different breed of family trauma altogether.

Now, Danny definitely experienced domestic violence. Was Danny physically abused? Absolutely. But because of identity shenanigans, 'was Danny physically abused?' and 'are the Fentons physically abusive?' are two very different questions. 'Was Danny physically abused?' is about Danny's childhood and the trauma he gained from it; 'are the Fentons physically abusive?' is a statement about their personalities. And this extends out to all of the other ways they failed Danny because they never knew about his ghost half.

Did Danny experience that trauma? Yes. Would the Fentons ever knowingly do those things to their child? No. (This contrast causes Danny a lot of stress.)

Of course, a lot of this is still rooted in headcanon, and other interpretations are equally valid! Just as it's never shown that they didn't make sure their kids got every meal, it's also never shown that they did. Just because it's never said that their kids couldn't catch their parents' attention when they needed help, doesn't mean that they could. But I wanted to get my thoughts down, since it's a fairly significant divergence from most of the standard interpretations.

[helen-lucilfer]

the aot men headcanons and ranking (+ the aot modern alternate universe headcanons and rankings)

———

how good of fathers would they be out of 10?

eren - 5/10. he’s not bad; just…he’s impulsive. he’s the dad who’s fun and all, playing with his kids and ruffling them on the head. but he’s probably going to teach his kids how to punch other people in the most painful way too. then when the kid’s mother scolds eren for it, he just shrugs.

armin - 8/10. literally the sweetest guy ever, but i have this feeling deep inside me knowing that he would have a hard time scolding his child. he’d see them tear up and then he’d start tearing up too and feel SO BAD while hugging them. he would be a girl dad though, with his gentle personality and all.

jean - 8.5/10. he’s a girl dad, no you can’t change my mind. he’d spoil his kids ROTTEN—and i’d bet all of my money that he would teach his son chivalrous values while treating his daughter like a little princess, just like how he was raised (ughhhh the jean and his mom OVA has my heart🥺💕)

conny - 4/10. he’s such a sweetie, but the biggest problem is his lack of experience since HE’S always the one getting taken care of, plus he’s not the brightest. i just KNOW that when he holds his baby, they start crying uncontrollably, and he freaks out because he doesn’t know what to do.

levi - 7/10. what? he’s literally already a dad to eren and mikasa and armin and conny and jean and sasha and…okay, i think you get it. but losing so many people in his life will definitely impact his parenting style. i guarantee that he will be overprotective of his kids due to being scared of losing them.

reiner (MY MAN🤤) - 9/10. JUST LOOK AT HIM WITH GABI AND FALCO AND ZOFIA AND UDO🥺. he CAN BE responsible and a good leader if he tries, which are natural qualities of a good father. but similar to levi, after losing so many people, he’d be pretty protective of his kids. especially growing up as an eldian in marley, he’d be so overly concerned for his kids.

———

are they good at cooking?

eren - no. do NOT let this man into the kitchen under any circumstances unless you want to look like armin during season 3.

armin - yes, definitely. armin deserves to have a professional chef license. the moment anyone is craving something, here he is.

jean - no. this guy had literally been spoiled ever since day one, since his mom literally always feeds him and pampers him.

conny - NO. please, NEVER let this man within 2 yards of the kitchen. he WILL burn down the kitchen. if he doesn’t, the food will be inedible.

levi - barely. he had to survive in the underground and all, so he can cook just a little bit. maybe a fried egg or heating some meat.

reiner - barely. similar to levi, having to survive warrior candidate training and being in a war for YEARS, he probably knows how to cook some sort of meat above a fire.

———

(modern AU) can they drive?

eren - he’s average at driving. he gets road rage and starts speeding like crazy before he finally gets a ticket.

armin - he’d be too nervous on the road. he’d be too scared of accidentally hitting another car or speeding.

jean - surprisingly good. probably one of the only one of the main cast who doesn’t ever get into a car crash or a ticket.

conny - NO. please don’t ever get into this man’s car. you WILL come out throwing up and hugging the ground.

levi - he’s not the best at driving, but he can get the job done. he has road rage, but he isn’t too obvious about it. but he WILL drum his fingers on the steering wheel.

reiner - definitely. he’s 100% that one person that everyone goes to whenever they need someone to drive them somewhere.

———

random hc about them in the modern AU

eren - goth mikasa once asked eren to cosplay as light and misa with her. eren didn’t even know who they were, so he then agreed. it didn’t end well for eren.

armin - whenever he has a crush, he never tells them out of fear because he’s a weirdo. because of that, he always slowly watches them fall in love with someone else😕

jean - every morning, he spends 2 hours on his hair. he does it not only to impress mikasa, but also because he loves looking at his entire face. eren called him a horse one day and jean stopped.

conny - the reason he has a bald head is because he found a razor in his house one day. he remembered seeing people on YouTube using it and he found it cool, trying to shave his chin. suddenly his arm went out of control and the razor went to his hair.

levi - he was once cleaning the bathrooms and heard a student crying in one of the stalls. he felt bad but just didn’t really say anything because he didn’t know what to say. when he found out who the student was, he always made sure to pay extra attention to them.

reiner (my man canonically follows historia all the time during this AU😔) - he works out all the time in the school gym instead of the public gym because he wants to impress historia.

[fbfh]

Could I request a drabble with Dave Lizewski and his best friend who has a major crush on Kick Ass and tells Dave all the dirty details?

OOOOOH SCRUMDIDDLYUMPTIOUS. aged up to 18+ obvs, give me a hoot or holler in the notes or my ask box if you want a fluffier version lol

Dave always wondered why girls never noticed him. he figured it was cause he's a quiet geeky nerd who likes comic books and superheroes. nope. it's because of you. when you first met Dave - however old you were, freshman, middle schoolers, kindergarteners - you latched the fuck onto this boy so fast. you've always been protective over him, always had that vibe that says you fuck with him, I'll fuck you up. besides, having a best friend as hot as you immediately made everyone assume he's totally off the market. like, it should be obvious. being "best friends" with someone as hot as you, spending all your time together - you have sleepovers for god's sake. EVERYONE at school fully believes you're fucking. the only ones unaware of this are Dave and Todd and Marty and possibly yourself.

it's at one of these infamous sleepovers that you finally spilled the beans. you've been obsessing over kickass for weeks, constantly talking about him and his exploits to Dave. you just got your hands on another grainy, horribly low quality picture of kickass stopping a purse snatching from someone's video doorbell. you're sitting at Dave's desk while he's flopped on his bed, finishing some homework.

"fuck I want him in my mouth so fucking bad..."

it just slips out, but Dave is instantly hard. he startles, sputtering and desperate to know who his best friend is practically moaning for.

"y-you want who?!" he demands in confusion at your sudden outburst, causing both of you to laugh. you turn the monitor towards him, and Dave sees himself looking back. his stomach does the thing, that flippy jerky oh shit thing from both anxiety and horniness. he is really, really hard now.

"k-kickass?" he asks, his voice getting all whiny and cracking in that way you've always found so cute.

"yes!" you exclaim with a laugh, looking at him incredulously. "come on Dave, you told me about a sex dream you had about our math teacher two days ago. he groans half heartedly at you bringing up.

"I already regret telling you about that." he protests playfully, his voice muffled into his duvet.

"just look at him," you sigh, already looking at the pictures of kickass. "look at his arms... I'd probably cum just from him putting me in a headlock."

Dave nearly chokes on his spit. He's really glad he's laying on his stomach so you can't see the way he's kind of rubbing against his mattress. it's not on purpose or anything, it's not like he's trying to get off to his best friend (even though he has before. like a lot. like he has to clear his porn search history because it's all descriptors of people who look like you) but when you're going on and on about how wet you'd get from being choked by a guy without realizing he's actually inches away from you... well, what is he supposed to do??

"christ, you can see his whole bulge in this one," you murmur, biting you lip. "I have never wanted to suck someone off so bad."

Dave lets out a choked noise, which you interpret as more playful disgust over your thirsting.

"I'm serious!" you exclaim. "I swear to god, he could keep me barefoot and pregnant and I'd thank him."

Dave's hips have started moving faster on their own as he grinds against his mattress. he knows he shouldn't prod for more details of what you'd do to kickass - to him - he knows you're his best friend and that you'd probably think he was some sick freak if you knew the truth, that he's kickass and he's getting off to you listening to you talk about him like that. Dave loves you, he respects you and admires you and cherishes your friendship so much, so why is feeling guilty and conflicted about about listening to you unintentionally dirty talk like this making it feel so good??

"literally, I would make sure his balls were always empty. like, always." you state.

each word that tumbles out of your mouth makes his blood burn with lust.

"U-uh huh," he chokes out, fighting for his LIFE not to moan in front of you right now.

"just one chance," you sigh, "I just know he's majorly packing. Bet he cums a lot too." you murmur.

you're pouting now. pouting over not being able to taste his cock. the same cock Dave is trying to discreetly jerk off just a few feet away from you. he whines softly, praying you won't notice as you continue to look through photos of him as kickass.

"I don't think I've ever been so down for someone," you whine, throwing your head back and sighing. "okay, you can't tell anyone about this-"

you start seriously.

"but I literally got off thinking about him last night, and I came so hard-"

and if that's not the straw that breaks the camel's back. Dave lets out a strangled, stifled whining moan as his hips rut and stutter against his mattress. his head swims as he cums in his pants, blinded by a raw, pure pleasure.

"O-oh god!" he pants, head spinning as he comes down from his high. his cheeks are flushed, and he can't fucking believe he just did that in front of you. he swallows thickly, terrified - and for some reason, a little thrilled by how you'll react.

you look over at him, eyes locked on him for a moment. it only takes you a second to realize what just happened - your horndog best friend got so turned on from listening to you thirst over kickass that he actually creamed his pants.

"You're so gross," you laugh playfully, throwing a pen at him. "I hope you know how lucky you are that I'm great at keeping secrets." you finish, an unspoken promise that tonight will stay between the two of you.

you turn back to what you're doing, unperturbed by the fact that your best friend just came in his pants from hearing you talk like that, chalking it up to Dave being Dave. this isn't the first time he's gotten hard at an awkward time, but usually he just sneaks off to the bathroom or something to take care of it himself. you had a hunch he might resort to something like this eventually, so you're not too surprised.

"Anyway, what do you think his type is?" you ask, swiveling around Dave's desk chair to look at him. your arms are crossed on the back of the chair, and you lean down on them as you look at him.

"Like, from an objective, guy perspective?"

"U-uh," Dave starts with a soft, nervous laugh, still unable to believe that just happened. "I- I don't know..." he shrugs.

he thinks that's the first time he's lied to you. he knows exactly what kickass's type is, because he's looking right at you.

[thecoffeelorian]

The Anomaly Series, Chapter 3: The Quest (Jod Na Nawood x Reader)

A/N: ...Yes, this story is now, OFFICIALLY, canon divergent. Ya know, because I don't condone/endorse violence against children, and any other disclaimers I need to put here.

Also, there are three literal episodes left, so pardon me if I'm still holding out for Jod and Neel eventually twinning in their clothing choices in canon. 'Nuff said.

Chapter Title: The Quest

Genre: Drama/Romance; Slow Burn; Obvious Canon Divergence.

Word Count: 1,698 words

AO3: Click Here!

Special Notes: As I'm not yet sure how I even begin to breach the topic of child abuse here...let's just do the safe thing and label this as 'Spoilers up to Episode 4'. Thank you.

No Pressure Tags:

@chenoa-devyn-blog @not-approvedtrash @lulalovez @deepestballoonllama-fandoms @papa-poutine

@xbeyondthegatex @bridge-always @loverdjudeforever @kucharka23 @khaleesihavilliard

@xitlalli2001 @braveincafleet @amawu23 @gun-roswell @bruceewayne

@shirley-girly @cloudofpinkicecream @lokigirlszendaya @valdasha @aemondvelaryon

@carry-on-wayward-daughter @pantasticalcat @robin-hyperfixates @down-down-by-the-river @sydneyann623

@brookeandherfandoms @kazunish @redermraven @ladyofthelakee @nightlordsvengence

@tarboo13 and anybody else who wonders what romance would look like for this hot mess of a man. :D

I’m a person who needs your help…

As of ten seconds ago, every other thought that had once been safe inside your mind feels as though they’ve all flown away, and so not left much else behind them save for one of the few thoughts that remains.

You’re officially involved.

There’s no other way around it now, because you’re feeling it too deep in your consciousness to turn back. You’re involved in this stranger’s case, and it’s going to take nothing less than a little Reclamation of your own to knock you off this path, and—despite all of your previous attempts to calm down, there’s some of the old adrenaline starting to course back into your body.

My help…? What kind of help do you need?

This rush makes you just a tiny bit lightheaded as you wait for Jack’s response, not knowing if he’s about to try and sweet-talk you into arranging a jailbreak or not. That was THE one thing that the Reclamation Committee had been worried about, and so, even if he let loose with a mountain of ‘Sweethearts’, odds already were that you would have to turn him down due to your ingrained obedience to the Law.

The same Law that, unfortunately, has spirited him out of your reach and out of your sight.

Something that I doubt my jailers want anything to do with.

And why is that?

They’re the ones who just robbed me.

Not that you’ll necessarily have to, maybe, because he hasn’t brought it up yet…but then again, he could always try to trick you up by slipping some kind of missing key or lockpick into the mix. Judging by how the security droids were more than happy to keep their weapons trained upon him, anything is possible here.

I’m sorry.

No need to apologize to me, sweetheart. You’re not the one who did this.

But I am the one you want to help fix it...right?

That depends. How good are you at finding lost things?

That’s one thought you have to keep fresh and safe inside your mind no matter what, along with eventually refusing him in that sense if it should happen.

In the meantime, though, you’re adding a second page to this new file of yours, as you have a slight feeling that you might certainly need it later.

Well…I once found my best friend’s missing keychain back in school.

That must have been a while ago, though. What about recently?

That depends on where you’re going with this. What’s so important that you need my assistance?

Fine. They took all my belongings away before they locked me up. Happy now?

Another thought that you’re unfortunately blessed with, though, is the image of Crimson Jack being attacked by two prison droids. The first never thinks twice about administering a few short electric shocks; the second strips him clean of any and all weapons or tools; and then finally, both of them turn and tilt their heads to each other in a gesture of smug triumph.

More like slightly flustered, but thank you—

—‘Flustered’?

It’s what happens when a person’s annoyed, confused, or both. Continue.

All right…

This is one thought you don’t want to fixate on too strongly, because you already have a feeling that you might end up worrying yourself sick if you don’t pull yourself together first. No, it’ll be better for the both of you if you have work like this to focus on instead, and for this reason, you add a third page.

…First item, a blaster pistol of my own making, about twenty-five years old with a slim wooden handle. Second item—

—Wait, what’s a blaster?

You’ve never seen a blaster before?

I’ve never seen a war before. Care to describe it?

There’s a small pause between writing, almost as though he’s stopping to think or else let out a sigh of frustration—then your next set of directions comes.

All right, look. I don’t want to take all day, and I’m guessing you have plans, so let’s keep it simple. Put your hand flat out in front of you.

As for you, you’re left raising both eyebrows before doing as you’re asked, though not without feeling just a little bit silly.

Now, take the last two fingers on whatever hand you’ve picked, and curl them in towards you.

Another curious direction, to be sure…yet you obey that one as well.

And finally, once you’re ready, raise your remaining three fingers up and act like you’re shooting the wall.

Once you’ve fully caught on to this particular mental image, however, that’s when you almost drop your writing equipment out of shock.

…Heck.

Nasty thing, isn’t it?

Wow, you think?!

Try spending twenty years with one of those aimed at you, and you’ll get what war is.

Whatever you say, CJ…

You let out an annoyed huff of your own before adding a fourth page to your document, somewhat feeling as though you might cut this conversation off if it gets too—well, wild. As someone who still knows precious little about the one you’re writing to, you certainly count this idea as a possibility.

…Any other weapons I need to know about?

‘CJ’?

Those are your initials, silly. Think of it like a nickname if that’s easier.

Hm…

Another small pause. He seems to be taking his time figuring out what to make of you as well, or so the slow pacing of this ‘meeting’ suggests to you.

…Anyways. As I was saying, second item, fairly unused Lightsaber as I prefer the blaster.

I suppose that's like a knife?

If you want to make comparisons, yes. It's got a thin, metallic hilt and so far, it's powered by a green colored stone somewhere in there.

Right...thin hilt, green stone. What else?

Brown jacket with gray stripes on the sleeves and collar. That’s the third item I’m missing.

And the fourth?

It’s sewn inside the third. In fact, if you have a chance, I’d prefer to recover both of them before we find the others.

So it’s all a big mystery for you to solve, then. Some off-the-wall version of the Great Party Icebreaker to endear you to The New Guy In The Office, provided as always that you don’t end up contracting Foot-In-Your-Mouth Disease.

Ah, well...your nights at home, totally alone, were getting a little boring anyway.

Very good...so you’re in a holding cell right now, I assume?

Obviously.

What are you being charged with?

A fifth page. Gods, this file’s getting a little big, or so you’re all too happy to tell yourself as nobody else can see the awkward look on your face right now.

Nobody’s bothered to tell me.

Have you been provided any legal counsel?

What’s that?

And yet, as awkward as all of this feels, you’ve definitely got your work cut out for you. Work that involves making sure that any possible trial moves forward without a hitch, because with a suspect as high-profile as this one, there’s no way anybody will want to risk the case being thrown out.

A pity they don’t make Lawyer Droids for this exact purpose.

Nevertheless, with the three words ‘MUST. FIND. LEGAL COUNSEL.’ written on the imaginary wall in your mind, you’re still pushing yourself onward just a bit further, as you’re more or less feeling that you’re too far in to turn back now.

Okay...just a few more things before we wrap things up here.

Go on.

Firstly...why me? And—and what was it that happened out there on the landing pad?

A third pause. He’s either taking his time finding the right words to answer you with, or else to cook up a pretty plausible lie with which to keep you occupied. Strange how the one seems so much like the other, at least at this moment in time.

I...don’t really know for sure.

‘Don’t know’? You don’t know if you have some special talent, or you don’t know why your special talent reacted the way it did?

Both. Neither. It’s as crazy to me as it is to you.

Fine…

You’ll be sure to find out what’s really taking place here, though, if there’s any way to get in touch with the people—or droids—who took him into custody. You might also try poking around the local library later this week, if there’s any chance at all that there might be some hint of your new life situation to read up on.

As for how the little crew he traveled with might figure into this, a fact that you’re far too keen to forget about even as you add a sixth page to this file—

And the last thing you wanted to ask me?

Simple…do your traveling companions know where you are?

—You’re working on it. Maybe you’ll have to get parental consent before questioning them. Maybe they’ll instead show up on your doorstep one day, hands full of dataries and voices full of pleading, totally ready to cooperate and compensate you for your time in one go. Either way, they’re witnesses.

When it comes to whether or not Crimson Jack himself will help his case or harm it, well...that concept just isn’t as clear. In fact, he very nearly confuses you with no pauses, awkward silences, or hesitations of any kind.

Just a slowly written No, almost as though just thinking about this part is too painful.

As for you, you can still remember how scared those kids were at the mere thought of him being harmed by the security droids...so it’s more than just a little bit understandable. Whatever else happened up there, whatever blaster fights, lightsaber duels, or anything else that this group saw...they must have had some time to bond.

But you’d like to see them, right?

YES.

Good. I won’t waste any time if I can help it, but I will need you to give me something in return first.

And that is…?

Your true name.

And if you have any grasp upon this stranger’s character, which you hope very much that you do—that bond just might be the key to saving old Crimson Jack’s life.

TO BE CONTINUED

[aahsokaatano]

I've lived in several different places in the US, from "right on the edge of a major metropolis" to "I can hear the banjos from Deliverance if I walk the dogs too far in one direction" and I have to say, I agree strongly with all of the above. And this was never more obvious to me than when I was living in a tourist area.

When you live in a tourist destination, especially if it's a very small and contained area (like, say, the Florida Keys), you're probably looking at a 40 to 60 minute drive one way to get to basic shit like a Target, or a Home Depot. Sure, there is technically a walkable shopping area very nearby... but it's all aimed at the tourists. So it's cheap novelty t-shirts, and $2 sandals, or extremely high-end stuff that you could never even hope to afford.

The Keys are roughly 100 miles long, from Key Largo to Key West, with only 1 road for the vast majority of it. When there is an accident on that road - which happens frequently, because people drink in the Keys like it's going out of style - depending on where exactly it happens, it can close down the entire Keys in both directions for hours.

There are only four grocery stores in the entirety of the Keys. There are roughly 25 islands in the chain - granted, most people are centered around Key Largo, Islamorada, Marathon, and Key West, but there are houses up and down most of US 1. It's not only impossible for most people to walk anywhere from their houses, it's practically suicidal with the way people drive.

We used Amazon constantly when we lived in the Keys. We also signed up for one of those food delivery services - not the meal prep ones, but like "every month you get a few pounds of frozen meat delivered to your door" - because it was both easier, cheaper, and safer for us to be driving on US 1 as little as possible.

Putting in more buses, more high speed trains, more shuttles, more ferries... It would just be better on literally every single level for us.

there is no ethical consumption under capitalism

Years ago now, I remember seeing the rape prevention advice so frequently given to young women - things like dressing sensibly, not going out late, never being alone, always watching your drink - reframed as meaning, essentially, "make sure he rapes the other girl." This struck a powerful chord with me, because it cuts right to the heart of the matter: that telling someone how to lower their own chances of victimhood doesn't stop perpetrators from existing. Instead, it treats the existence of perpetrators as a foregone conclusion, such that the only thing anyone can do is try, by their own actions, to be a less appealing or more difficult victim.

And the thing is, ever since the assassination of United Healthcare CEO Brian Thompson, I've kept on thinking about how, in this day and age, CEOs of big companies often have an equal or greater impact on the day to day lives of regular people than our elected officials, and yet we have almost no legal way to redress any grievances against them - even when their actions, as in the case of Thompson's stewardship of UHC, arguably see them perpetrating manslaughter at scale through tactics like claims denial. That this is a real, recurring thing that happens makes the American healthcare insurance industry a particularly pernicious example, but it's far from being the only one. Because the original premise of the free market - the idea that we effectively "vote" for or against businesses with our dollars, thereby causing them to sink or swim on their individual merits - is utterly broken, and has been for decades, assuming it was ever true at all. In this age of megacorporations and global supply chains, the vast majority of people are dependent on corporations for necessities such as gas, electricity, internet access, water, food, housing and medical care, which means the consumer base is, to all intents and purposes, a captive market. We might not have to buy a specific brand, but we have to buy a brand, and as businesses are constantly competing with one another to bring in profits, not just for the company and its workers, but for C-suites and shareholders - profits that increasingly come at the expense of workers and consumers alike - the greediest, most inhumane corporations set the financial yardstick against which all others are then, of necessity, measured. Which means that, while businesses are not obliged to be greedy and inhumane in order to exist, overwhelmingly, they become greedy and humane in order to compete, because capitalism encourages it, and because there are precious few legal restrictions to stop them from doing so. At the same time, a handful of megacorporations own so many market-dominating brands that, without both significant personal wealth and the time and resources to find viable alternatives, it's all but impossible to avoid them, while the ubiquity of the global supply chain means that, even if you can keep track of which company owns which brand, it's much, much harder to establish which suppliers provide the components that are used in the products bearing their labels. Consider, for instance, how many mainstream American brands are functionally run on sweatshop labour in other parts of the world: places where these big corporations have outsourced their workforce to skirt the already minimal labour and wage protections they'd be obliged to adhere to in the US, all to produce (say) electronics whose elevated sticker price passes a profit on to the company, but without resulting in higher wages for either the sweatshop workers overseas or the American employees selling the products in branded US stores.

When basically every major electronics corporation is engaged in similar business practices, there is no "vote" our money can bring that causes the industry itself to be better regulated - and as wealthy, powerful lobbyists from these industries continue to pay exorbitant sums of money to politicians to keep government regulation at a minimum, even our actual votes can do little to effect any sort of change. But even in those rare instances where new regulations are passed, for multinational corporations, laws passed in one country overwhelmingly don't prevent them from acting abusively overseas, exploiting more desperate populations and cash-poor governments to the same greedy, inhumane ends. And where the ultimate legal penalty for proven transgressions is, more often than not, a fine - which is to say, a fee; which is to say, an amount which, while astronomical by the standards of regular people, still frequently costs the company less than the profits earned through their unethical practices, and which is paid from corporate coffers rather than the bank accounts of the CEOs who made the decisions - big corporations are, in essence, free to act as badly as they can afford to; which is to say, very. Contrary to the promise of the free market, therefore, we as consumers cannot meaningfully "vote" with our dollars in a way that causes "good" businesses to rise to the top, because everything is too interconnected. Our choices under global capitalism are meaningless, because there is no other system we can financially support that stands in opposition to it, and while there are still small businesses and companies who try to operate ethically, both their comparative smallness and their interdependent reliance on the global supply chain means that, even if we feel better about our choices, we're not exerting any meaningful pressure on the system we're trying to change. Which means that, under the free market, trying to be an ethical consumer is functionally equivalent to a young woman dressing modestly, not going out alone and minding her drink at parties in order to avoid being raped. We're not preventing corporate predation or sending a message to corporate predators: we're just making sure they screw other worker, the other consumer, the other guy.

All of which is to say: while I'd prefer not to live in a world where shooting someone dead in the street is considered a valid means of redressing grievances, what the murder of Brian Thompson has shown is that, if you provide no meaningful recourse for justice against abusive, exploitative members of the 1%, then violence done to those people will have the feel of justice, because it fills the void left by the lack of consequences for their actions. It's the same reason why people had little sympathy for the jackass OceanGate CEO who killed himself in his imploding sub, or anyone whose yacht has been attacked by orcas - it's just intensified here, because where the OceanGate CEO was felled by hubris and the yachts were random casualties, whoever killed Thomspon did so deliberately, because of what he did. It was direct action against a man whose policies very arguably constituted manslaughter at scale; a crime which ought to be a crime, but which has, to date, been permitted under the law. And if the law wouldn't stop him, can anyone be surprised that someone might act outside the law in retaliation - or that regular people would cheer for them when they did?

[growth-opportunities]

A girl becomes addicted to her breasts getting bigger, and her second puberty aides her in becoming ginormous (talking hyper-sized, if possible - as big as you desire)

I genuinely don't understand how every girl doesn't get addicted to the feeling of their breasts growing. I was pretty much hooked the morning I outgrew my first bra. There was something... empowering about it. I don't know if I can fully describe it. The actual bra was uncomfortable, sure, but knowing that I was too big for it, subtle bulges around the edges... god. It was the first time in my entire life that I felt sexy. I was literally too sexy for my clothes and, fuck, it felt amazing. That was when I first started fantasizing about being properly huge, waiting until my parents went to bed and awkwardly searching the internet for "what happens when bigger than Z cup". But, as much as I wanted it, genetics had other plans.

It should have been a little bit obvious, in hindsight, but greed had blinded my young eyes. As I learned while snooping through the laundry, my older sister stopped growing at a C. My mom wore D-cup bras, but I'm pretty sure that was mostly from having kids and, while I was willing to do a lot for bigger tits, that seemed a little extreme. I was never going to huge like I had imagined, like I had dreamed, like I had prayed. My growth pretty much petered out at a large B/small C depending on the brand. That was all that genetics had deigned to give me and I can't pretend that I wasn't disappointed. No matter how many of my friends reassured me that I was "the perfect size" and they "fit my frame", that wasn't what I wanted. I wanted big. I wanted huge. I wanted the kind of tits that would make even the most hardened of hentai-consuming perverts (a crowd that I quickly found myself part of) wonder if it wasn't a little much.

But I wasn't about to take it lying down.

I got a job at a cafe to "save money for college", but every last penny I had went to buying supplements online. The unruly guests, making my cheeks hurt with forced smiles, doing everything I could to maintain my customer service voice, all of it was worth it in pursuit of a singular goal. Creams and lotions, pills and supplements, anything that even remotely promised growth was hastily ordered in lust-fueled hazes late at night. Shady sites stole my credit card info, like, three times and I was almost positive most were sugar pills or snake oil, but the joke about a man actually inventing penis-enlarging pills and having no way to market it stuck in my brain. If there was one breast growth supplement out there that was 100% legit then by god I was going to find it.

And, despite the incredible odds, it did work! To an extent. I managed to push my tits to a very swollen DD. Constantly massaging my breasts, kneading various lotions into my skin made them incredibly sensitive. If I hadn't already been obsessed with my tits, that level of sensitivity would have made it so. I could feel them bouncing and sloshing in my bras constantly. As much as I hated them, bras were a must. I didn't care about the 'modesty' or whatever, but feeling my shirt casually rub against my nipples all fucking day drove me insane. There were days where I didn't leave me room, just played with my tits until I came over and over again. Eventually, I'd stagger out at some point in the evening to rehydrate before crawling back into my cave, teasing my nipples and fantasizing about being double, triple, orders of magnitude bigger. I tried my best to come to terms with the fact that this is probably as busty as I'd ever be. Until, one morning, it wasn't.

I can still remember waking up and feeling that weight on my chest. As many times as I had dreamed about it, I didn't know what it was like until I finally felt it, that kind of heft on my chest. My jaw dropped open when I pulled back the covers and saw what had become of my tits. They doubled in size. Overnight. They literally looked inflated, almost unnaturally round, my skin red and covered in a web of veins. The sensitivity was mind-blowing. I could feel the air moving over my skin and it was just... woof. Between the size and the sensitivity, I had to get myself off immediately. Twice. Usually post-nut clarity had never hit me too hard previously, mostly just disappointment at my impossible fantasies, but that day it hit me like a freight train. Something wasn't right.

A few doctor's visits and some blood work later and I had an answer. I never admitted to taking the supplements, though my doctor was skeptical; he had never seen anything like this in someone whose thyroid wasn't full of holes. It turns out that, while the pills didn't really do much, all of the hormones that were in them were just sort of sitting in my system. If I had only taken one or two, they would have been flushed out pretty easily. But I was taking more than a dozen different pills. I was unknowingly adding more and more kindling to the pyre, adding in the hormonal equivalent of gasoline and thermite, just waiting until it reached critical mass and self-ignited. It was enough to trigger what was essentially a second puberty, my body starting to flood with self-made hormones outside of the supplements, but thanks to the variety of topical creams and lotions, it would be contained almost entirely in my breasts.

I was fairly silent on the car ride home, though I did whimper a bit when we hit a pothole. I trudged up to my room, carefully disrobed myself. My eyes were glued to the mirror, unable to take my eyes off of myself. Titflesh overflowed my palms, bulged out between my fingers, there was just so much of it. I could barely come to terms with the fact that all that was me. That thought alone nearly made me cum. The rest of the day was a lust-fueled frenzy. My pussy was largely neglected, focused entirely on my tits to get myself off over and over and over again. It felt incredible. The reality would come later, but I was too busy cumming then.

Unlike my first go 'round, which was painfully slow, my second puberty wasted no time. I was putting on at least an inch of bust every day. Sometimes, if I sat very still and held my breath, I swear I could watch them swelling in front of my eyes. Within a week, they were big enough to reach my bellybutton and, a week after that, they were almost at my hips. I was eating like a glutton, but I had to; my growing udders were taking up every calorie I put into my body. At some point, I started staying in my room not just because I was spending every hour of the day masturbating but because I had outgrown not just all of my clothes, but even our beach towels weren't bit enough to cover my tits. I could feel, every day, as the weight pulled heavier on my shoulders, nearly dragging me off my feet as they slid off my lap. I could feel my mobility slipping away, which would have been more frightening if it wasn't so arousing.

So anyway, that about brings things to now! My breasts are still technically growing, though at this size, it's kind of hard to notice an extra inch or two. I haven't officially measured these things in ages, so I can only guess that I'd have gone around the alphabet a few dozen times by now. I'm big enough that each, individual tit is big enough for me to use as a bed with room left over. Reaching my nipples is a workout, having to gather up so much titflesh in my hands and arms to get to them, though I rarely make it all the way there. I tend to get a little 'distracted'. The irony is that, after all this time, finally experiencing what it's like to be big has actually cooled me a little bit on the enormous fantasies. I mean, I'm already living the dream! Outside of just "bigger", there wasn't much left to explore on that avenue.

I have been taking a recent interest in lactation, though...

[witchygagirlwrites]

Broken Bonds-Part 16

Former(ish) Greg "Mouse" Gerwitz x Reader, BabyDaddy! Jay Halstead x Reader

You're getting everything in line to return to work and facing the fact that your feelings for Jay hasn't faded as you've healed. They've gotten stronger. Have you fallen for him while you still love Mouse?

Once Jay’s vacation time was up you found yourself yet again having to find a new normal. It was so weird not going to work because you’d literally worked until the day your water broke. You and him ended up deciding that you would start slowly getting Addy used to his place as well as yours, a couple nights a week. You had also taken to using his place for naps if you were closer to there than yours when that time hit if you were out and about. It was a way for her to get used to both cribs and environments, even though a part of you screamed “THIS IS A BAD IDEA” when he’d given you a key to his apartment and you’d given him a key to yours.

It was a precaution for Addy, that was all. You would never intrude on his privacy nor him yours. So maybe you’d dozed off in his bed a time or two after hitting the gym heavy? It wasn’t like he cared. Heck the time he’d come home to find you curled up in the middle of his bed he hadn’t even bothered waking you up, you ended up realizing he’d got off early about an hour later when you woke up and walked out into the living room to find him laid across the couch with Addy on his chest. That hadn’t made your heart flip in your chest at seeing him content at just laying with her after a work day, nor did your heart skip a beat when he noticed your presence and smiled before saying “Look baby girl, mommy’s up”

You were back with Dr Charles once a week just to try to regulate your emotions and it seemed to be helping. Postpartum was staying in check. You were eating like you were supposed to and keeping hydrated and working out again. You and Addy were bonded and you had a damn good support system, all in all you couldn’t have had your pregnancy go better. You placed a large amount of that on Jay. He’d been your cornerstone in everything, from the moment you placed those hospital papers in his hands. 

He could’ve walked away. He could’ve fallen back and simply been there for doctors appointments and the delivery. He could’ve just been the position of Adeline’s father but no he’d been everything to you during the pregnancy. He was your protector, your friend, your shadow every step of the way. If you looked too hard at how you truly felt about him you were afraid your entire world may come crashing down on top of you because the fact was that the feelings you had for him were slowly becoming obvious that they were more than just him being Addy’s father.

You couldn’t look too hard at how your heart was functioning because how the hell were you supposed to trust an organ that thudded wildly in your chest when it heard Mouse’s voice only to have the same reaction when Jay would brush an innocent kiss against your temple? You knew what love was, knew how it felt, knew how to recognize it but what the hell was your body doing to you?

“Thanks for watching her for a couple hours, Stel. I just gotta get my recert” you were zeroing in fast on your six week mark so you were lining up appointments to get everything done. Today was the firing range to get recertified, at least this year you weren’t shooting next to Jay.You were a damn good shot but next to him? You always looked bad.

She smiled as she took Addy out of her carrier “Are you kidding me? I get to hang out with my best friend all day! Isn’t that right baby girl? You’re Aunt Stella’s best friend” Addy cooed at her lightly and you laughed “Guess she agrees. I’ve got to get my physical done, along with my six week check up in a couple days and she has to go the pediatrician”

Stella nodded then cut her eyes up at you “I love her with my entire heart but you’re getting an IUD aren’t you?” You laughed lightly “You bet your ass I am. I don’t want another incident happening any time soon” she grinned, holding Addy to her chest “Although if it was Jay’s at least we know he’s all in” 

You narrowed your eyes at her and she shrugged “I’m just making an observation. How are things going anyways? Kelly isn’t here. Just us and I don’t think Addy is to the point of gossiping yet”  You ran your hand over Addy’s hair and shook your head “I’ve gotta get going. I can’t go to my recert test with a headache and getting into that right now may cause that” she laughed and shook her head “Ok, I’ll let it go…for now” 

You smiled “Thank you” and kissed her cheek “I love you” then kissed Addy’s forehead “And I love you” you glanced at the clock “I’ll be back by three” Stella nodded “Take your time. I have no plans” 

Sometimes you hated working for Voight simply because so many people held a damn beef for the man that was one sided. They hated him and he’d have to make some phone calls just to find out who the hell they were. The guy doing the recert was one of those. He was busting your balls at every damn turn once he found out you were one of Hank’s detectives.

When you’d finished the tenth target with nearly perfect marks and he set up for more you felt like you may very well shoot him. “Sir, what exactly is the issue? You’ve let three men recert that got less than half the marks I have” you asked, not caring because he’d pushed you too far. He raised his eyebrows “Can’t finish princess?” and you felt your blood boil  “Set them up”

While he prepped the targets you sent Jay a text Lukas Paulson, recert instructor. Busting my absolute balls. Paulson wasn’t done setting up targets when his phone started ringing. You watched, trying to bite back a smirk “Yes sir...yes sir..yes sir..”

He hung up and glared at you “Congratulations Detective Kidd. You’re recertified” he signed off on the tablet in front of him and emailed you a copy. You smiled “Thank you” just as you turned to walk out your phone chimed so you checked it as you got to your jeep Taken care of

You truly had just intended to vent or see if Voight knew him but Jay had done one better. He’d gotten either Voight or someone else to back him down. You glanced down when you got in your jeep. That same old polaroid still had its place along with the ultrasound Of Addy and one of her newborn photos. Yeah it was normal to have Mouse’s photo on your dash and your first reaction at something going on was to let Jay know. Totally normal reaction…yeah right.  You shook your head and sent back Thank you before bucking up and pulling out onto the road.

Jay smiled when the text from you came in. According to Voight, Paulson was still sore that once upon a time his son had set his sights on Intelligence. He hadn’t liked it when he was shut down and he really hadn’t liked it when he learned there were three females in the unit. You getting him for a recert was a bad luck of the draw and Voight was more than happy to remind him that it wouldn’t take but a phone call to have his son down to a mall cop if he was lucky.

Why he’d thought messing with one of the unit was a good idea was beyond Jay. Why he thought messing with you in particular was just idiotic. Kevin tossed a piece of balled up paper at his head to get his attention “When am I getting my partner back man?” he looked up at him and held up the phone “recert was today, six week check up and physical is in three days. All goes like it should her first day back will be monday of next week”

“When is she gonna bring Addy by? I haven’t seen her in like a week?” Kim asked and he laughed “I don’t know. She doesn’t want to bring her here because she knows it would disrupt any work getting done” Hailey slid back from her desk to look over at him “Bet I could get her to bring Addy to see me” he narrowed his eyes “Stay away her Upton, I swear..”

Adam cracked up laughing “Aww Halstead’s jealous. It’s adorable” Jay shook his head “I am not jealous. Hailey just keeps trying to marry the mother of my child and it’s getting a little weird” Hailey laughed “So this means you won’t give me away or?” and grinned when he glared at her. He knew it was in good humor but he was honestly starting to get a little jealous. You weren’t his, not really but dammit you were his something. 

When he looked at you, he felt something that he didn’t think could be explained away by the fact that you gave birth to his child. You were always his friend, his partner. Being there when you found out you were pregnant was as simple of a decision as breathing. Throughout the pregnancy there wasn’t a moment he didn’t find himself craving to be at your side. He’d never slept better than with you in his arms, feeling Addy kick. The innocent touches you’d allowed and chaste kisses to the temple or cheek drove his heart up the wall. Holding you in his arms while you brought the child the two of you made into the world? He didn’t have the words to describe how that felt. He just hoped Stella didn’t confront him again because when she asked before he hadn’t had a firm answer in his head but he did now and he wasn’t ready to look at it, ready to face it.

Another text came through and this one was a photo of Addy wearing a fireman onesie Help! Stella is tryin to convert our baby!! He felt a smile tug to his face and texted back Is this a bad time to mention Will got her pjs that look like scrubs? And you just sent back a face palm emoji. 

Hailey popped up over his shoulder “Is that my wife texting? It’s gotta be for you to be smiling like that” he shook his head and nudged her off his shoulder “My track record with partners is just getting weird at this point”  and looked back at his phone as another text came through, this one was from Stella and obvious that you hadn’t known she’d snapped the photo. You were turned sideways on her couch with your feet curled up under you and Addy on your chest. Your entire attention was on her and the smile on your face made his heart skip.  He saved both the solo photo of Addy and the one of you and her to his phone. 

He had about a dozen photos of you from different points in your pregnancy that he kept. Some you were at work, handling business as usual but others you were simply lounging around your apartment in a camisole and boxers that didn’t hide your baby belly one bit. He especially loved those because he knew for a fact only him and Stella got to see that. There was even a couple from the baby shower that Stella had snapped of you and him, citing that Addy needed to see how good of a relationship her parents had while she was “cooking”, his favorite one? You weren’t even looking at him in the photo, you were deep in conversation with Adam and Kevin but you were leaned back against him with your hands on your stomach and looked so at ease as if you trusted him to protect you from anything. 

Voight walking to his office door broke Jay out of his thoughts to give his sergeant his attention “Listen up, We got a call to respond to a fire on the south side. Fifty one went in and found a body. Gear up, we roll in five” 

When Stella told you about the fire fifty one responded to you texted Jay to check on the unit, knowing that case would get kicked their way. You managed to get back to your apartment and Addy unbundled before he texted back to let you know everyone was ok and to ask if he could stop by after work. You reminded him he had a key if you happened to already be asleep by the time he got off then set about the rest of your day.

____________________

You were sitting on the couch with Addy on your chest, reading your emails. There were a few from the district, mainly just checklists reminding you everything needed before you could come off maternity leave. There was one from the pediatrician reminding you of Addy’s appointment and one from Dr Asher’s office reminding you of your own. After you responded and confirmed everything you needed to, a new email came through and you froze with your thumb over the envelope when you saw Mouse’s name. 

Addy started to squirm so you stood up and put her in her swing to give her time off of you. She’d worn herself out during tummy time so she wasn’t up for much but you were trying to keep her up long enough Jay could see her because he’d texted you saying he only had thirty minutes top and that was twenty minutes ago.

____________

You sat on the floor in front of her swing and clicked on the email. You were a lot of things but a coward wasn’t one of them. How’s the prettiest mom in Chicago? I spoke to Jay last week, he said you’re amazing with her. I’m not surprised. You sound happy when we talk, especially when I can hear her and I couldn’t ask for more than that. I hope I can meet her too when I get back in Chicago before heading to Georgia, if it’s ok with you and Jay. I just wanted to check in with you. I’ll try to call you next week or so. Love Always, Gerwitz

You read the message twice over, a smile slipping onto your face. Of course he could meet Addy while he was in town. Hell if he planned on seeing you and Jay it was unavoidable but the fact that he made a point of letting you know he wanted to meet her meant something to you. You emailed back Don’t know about the prettiest mom but I’ll take it. I’m doing good. I go back to work soon. Jay just swears I’m amazing because I can change her diaper and make a bottle at the same time. She makes me happy, so much has gone wrong but she is everything good. Of course you can meet her. Thank you for checking in. Look forward to talking to you. Love Always, Kidd

The moment you hit send you heard a knock at the door and checked the time. Hopefully that was Jay because Addy had just yawned again. You laid your phone on the couch then stood and walked across the room, pushing her carrier out of the way with your food before unlocking the door. Jay stood on the other side and honestly looked exhausted “That bad?” you asked and he wiped a hand down his face “Be glad you’re not back yet. Where’s our baby girl? Please tell me she’s not asleep yet?”

You stepped back to let him in and motioned towards her swing “Nope, she’s holding on to be able to see her daddy” he grinned proudly, the tiredness peeling back at hearing Addy was still awake “Of course she is” you shook your head and closed the door, watching as he walked over to her swing and hit the button to turn it off before getting her out of it.

He pulled her into his arms and the moment she was against his chest you saw the muscles in his shoulders loosen. “Hey sweetheart, I missed you” he whispered against her head before sitting down on the couch. You didn’t want to move from your spot, standing right by the door because the picture of father and daughter was too perfect to disturb but Jay raised his voice to normal speaking level to tell Addy “Your mommy needs to come sit down too, I want to check on both of my girls before I head home tonight”

He glanced over his shoulder at you and you smiled “Ok, I get the point” you pushed off from the door and walked around the other end of the couch to sit next to Jay, leaving a half of a cushion between the two of you, He leaned back with her then turned his eyes towards you “Now what did  Paulson say to you?” you knew that look in his eyes. He wanted to have a little talk with him. You shook your head “Nothing that matters, he changed his tune quick after that phone call” he grinned “Probably so considering Voight told him if he screwed with anyone out of his unit again he’d make sure that son of his would have trouble finding work as a mall cop” 

“Wow, you got our sergeant calling to threaten people for me? Maybe Dr Asher was right, every woman needs the father of her child to be like you” you laughed and he smiled “Just doing my job here sweetheart. Besides you know how Voight is, he’s the only one who can bust our asses” “That is true” you laughed and Jay resituated on the couch so he was turned towards you and could have Addy on his chest and offer you a place on his chest to lay as well.

You turned to lay against his chest, listening to his steady heartbeat under your ear. “Mouse wants to meet Addy” you refused to keep anything like that from him. He nodded, chin brushing your head “I know, he mentioned it last week” one of your hands came up to his chest and he simply cut his eyes at you when you pulled the chain of his pendant free to run it through your fingers “You do know most people fidget with their own jewelry as a nervous habit?” 

You shrugged “I can’t lay on you and play with my ring unless you want me to sit up” “Continue playing with the chain” he whispered, Addy nuzzling into his chest as he spoke. “She still loves your voice” you pointed out and he grinned at you “You must like my voice well enough too, you asked me to keep talking to you while you were in labor” 

You ducked your head slightly, why you were embarrassed at that considering was beyond you. “Your voice kind of has a soothing effect Jay” His grin softened and his hand ran up your back, rubbing gentle circles “Good” 

What the hell was wrong with you? You were just emailing Mouse, telling him you loved him and was looking forward to seeing him and now you were cuddling with Jay. The change in mood must have shown because Jay’s face fell slightly before he nodded towards Addy “Let’s get her to her crib”

____________

Once Addy was laid in her crib and sleeping steadily you grabbed the baby monitor out of your room and walked back into the living room, even though her door was open you wanted to make sure you heard her. 

Jay was leaning on the kitchen counter, drinking a bottle of water when you walked out. He sat the bottle down then held his hand out towards you so you walked closer to him, letting him pull you into a hug “You’re overthinking again” he guessed and you cut your eyes up at him “That’s rude to read minds Halstead”

He laughed lightly “I can’t read minds but you? You I can read. What happened?” you shook your head “Talking about Mouse” “While being comfortable with me?” he guessed and you nodded. 

He sighed slightly, rubbing your lower back “It’s ok to be comfortable with me. I’m not gonna hurt you and if you decide to get back with him I’m not going to change how I act towards you. I will still be right here as much as you need me. You and Addy are my girls” you lowered your face to his shoulder, trying to ignore the feelings those words made flare to life in you. His girls. You liked being his girls. You were in love with Mouse but loved being Jay’s girl. You weren’t the woman you thought you were. 

“Hey, talk to me here” he spoke softly and you laughed, leaning back to look up at him “You’re such an amazing man Jay. My god I know Erin had gone through hell but I have no clue how she walked away from you” his eyes widened but the smile he gave you was so soft you’d only previously seen it pointed at Addy “Well if she hadn’t walked away from me and Mouse hadn’t left you we wouldn’t have Adeline so I say any heartache was worth it”

His eyes flickered from yours down to your lips and you found your eyes doing the same. You remembered how his lips felt against you, his hands on your body teasing and light then heavier, nearly bruising from his strength but holding back just enough to make sure he didn’t hurt you. The way his mouth had mapped out every scar on your body, every birthmark he’d never seen and every inch that made you gasp and squirm under him. 

He broke away first and cleared his throat “I um..I need to get home. I’ll come by before work?” you nodded a little too quickly, stepping out of his arms “Yeah, that’s fine” he smiled “Night Y/N” “Night Jay” he leaned down and pressed a kiss to your temple before heading to the door “I’ll text you when I get home” “Ok” you barely managed to get the words out but you did.

Once the door closed behind him you walked over to secure the locks and realized your hands were shaking. What the hell had just nearly happened?

“It’s been three days and he hasn’t mentioned it?” Stella asked and you shook your head. “Maybe I just imagined it? I mean I was in my head at the moment” you shrugged, looking over at Addy who was fast asleep in her bassinet. Stella had come over before her shift started and before you had to go to yours and Addy’s appointments.

She raised an eyebrow “I doubt that. Jay Halstead looks at you like you hung the freakin moon. Yeah most of that could be that you gave him his daughter but I think it’s more than that” You froze with your coffee mug halfway to your lips “What?” her eyes widened “Nothing. I said nothing.I’m only here as your big sister and little miss Adeline’s aunt”

“Stella Kidd-Severide. You tell me right now” you urged and she shrugged “I have seen men fall for you! Jay’s best friend included. It’s easy to see and I don’t think I’m imagining it. I’m not speaking on Jay’s feelings or lack thereof but I will say this, if you keep beating yourself up for this it’s apparent there’s something there. I don’t know what’s in your heart. I don’t care who you’re with as long as Addy is taken care of and you’re happy you could have a harem” “STELLA!” you laughed, looking to make sure you hadn’t woken up Addy.

She laughed then shrugged “I mean it. I don’t care, you’re my sister.I will defend you to anyone but I can’t protect you from beating yourself up. If you still love Mouse that’s ok. If you’ve fallen in love with Jay, that’s ok too. Falling back into that hole? That’s not ok” Hearing the words out loud, even her speaking them made your heart try to escape from your chest. A small smile slipped onto your face at her protective tone “You would really fight anyone for me wouldn’t you?” she laughed “Heck yeah and I got a husband who would be right there with me and I know Kevin Atwater is ready to ride when it comes to you”

She pulled you into a hug then checked her watch “Crap, we both gotta get a move on!” you looked at the time and grimaced “Shoot, we really do. At least all my appointments are in the same place” she nodded “That helps”

Your goal was to sneak into the twenty first, drop your all clear off with Trudy then sneak out. Easy, right? Yeah right. Cops were worse than old women when it came to keeping a secret.

You parked your jeep in front so intelligence would hopefully not spot it. You unhooked her carrier from the base and tucked your all clear paperwork in your hip pocket before heading up the stairs that led inside. You smiled at a patrolman that held the door for you “Thanks” he nodded “Nice to see Detective Kidd”

__________

You walked inside and the moment you crossed the threshold you heard Trudy “Is that the cutest baby in all of Chicago gracing my house?” you smiled as you walked up the stairs, holding a finger to your lips. You cut your eyes at the stairs “I’m trying to sneak here Trutru”

She nodded and motioned for you to come around her desk. You sat Addy’s carrier down and she looked at you for the ok to get her. You nodded and she quickly undid the safety restraints and had her out and in her arms “My god she gets prettier every time I see her!” you smiled, running your fingers down Addy’s back “Thank you, I feel like it’s just me and Jay being partial when we say that’ she shook her head “Nope, she is gorgeous”

You held up your all clear “I got a present! You get me back on monday!” Trudy smiled “Thank god. I’m sick of seeing those two pout” “Two?” you asked and she nodded “Atwater with no partner and Halstead with no you” you shook your head “Jay’s just jealous I had four extra weeks with more time with her”

She passed Addy to you then took the all clear and grabbed a file from her desk and flipped it open “Sign these three and you’re clear” you moved Addy to your left side and signed where she pointed.

She smiled “Happy to have my favorite detective back” “Thank you” You heard the gate blocking intelligence pop and your eyes popped right before you heard Kevin calling for Trudy “Crap”

“You know he’s gonna see you” she whispered and you sighed “Maybe he won’t snitch?” you followed her out around the corner and Kevin’s eyes got wide along with his smile “There’s my favorite girls” he came around the desk to hug you and ran a hand over Addy’s head.

You smiled up at him “And you’re not gonna tell Jay I was here right?” he looked from you to Trudy and you knew that look. That was Kevin’s “Why can’t I?” look. “C’mon Kev!” you begged and he shrugged “I know he’ll wanna see her and everyone else wants to see her”

You sighed “And if it interrupts the work day or a call comes in?” Trudy spoke up “They’ll roll out. Not that big of a deal” you looked between them before finally giving up. There was no way Jay wasn’t finding out you were here without telling him. “Kev, grab her carrier. Trudy buzz me up”

____________

“Go!” you heard Trudy tell Kevin who was at your side by the time the gate popped, holding Addy’s carrier and holding the gate open. You playfully glared at him “You’re my best friend and willing to snitch” he laughed “Lil mama I wouldn’t tell on you for big stuff but for this? She was almost born here. She deserves to see it”

You walked up the stairs and could hear everyone’s voices drifting down. When you made it to the top step it was nearly comical at their reaction because everyone froze mid sentence. Jay was sitting on the edge of Adam’s desk, Kim was sitting on Hailey’s and Voight was at the board. When they spotted you all five of them turned and smiles slipped onto their faces. “Adeline!” Kim and Hailey were the first up and to your side, even beating Jay.

Hailey asked to hold her so you let her. Her and Kim were absolutely gushing over her when Jay got to you “Why didn’t you tell me you were coming?” you cut your eyes at Kevin “I was going to drop something off and leave but someone planned to tell you” Jay looked at Kevin and grinned “My man”

Voight nodded to you “Kidd, do I get you back monday?” you nodded “Yes sir” he smiled “Good” then walked towards Hailey and Kim “Give me my granddaughter” Jay slipped an arm around your waist and whispered “Told ya it would go to his head” you laughed lightly,watching how Voight was such a different man when it came to babies “It’s kinda cute”

Jay shook his head and kissed your temple “How was her six week?” you smiled “Perfect marks all around”  he nodded “And yours?” you groaned “My side is killing me” his eyes flickered over your body like he did after takedowns when he was clocking you for injuries “Why?” “I’ll tell ya later” you laughed.

__________

After about half an hour they had to roll out because a tip came in. Jay of course wanted to walk you to your jeep despite your protests so fully geared out he carried Addy out and buckled her into the base. You shook your head “She’s gonna have to deal with so many girls having crushes on her hot dad when she gets older”

He shot you a smirk “Easy there, someone may get the idea you like me a little” you laughed “Wouldn’t want anyone thinking that” he closed her door then looked at you “I gotta go. I’ll see you later” You nodded “Be careful” and leaned up to press a kiss to his cheek. He smiled because normally he was the one to kiss you somewhere. “I will” he promised before heading to meet up with Hailey at his truck. You watched him for a moment before climbing in your jeep to head home.

“You didn’t have to ride in with me” you told Jay for the third time. He’d shown up to your apartment originally because the plan was for the two of you to follow each other to daycare to drop Addy off to her first day together. 

“I can ride with Hailey on calls and besides I’m going to want to go with you to pick her up to see how her first day went” he shrugged and you shook your head. You were worried too, not so much about the daycare but about being away from her. This was the longest you’d been without her just being at Jay’s for a night and this was the first time for you two leaving her with anyone outside of Stella.

He reached his hand across the console and you slipped yours into it “She’ll be fine sweetheart” he assured you and you smiled “Telling me or yourself that?” he shrugged one shoulder “Both?”

You and him both could watch the security feed at any time, Stella or Will could drop in and check on her. Chloe was there at the daycare. You were just worrying. Let a call come in and adrenaline hit and you’d be fine. Jay squeezed your hand gently “Worried you got rusty?”

You gasped playfully and snatched your hand away from his “We’ll see who’s rusty Halstead. Bet I could take your feet out from under you just fine” he raised an eyebrow “Bet you could” and you snapped your mouth shut. Yeah you walked into that one. “We gotta sign H.R. paperwork too” you reminded him.

Voight had a stack of H.R. paperwork you and Jay were required to fill out since you had a child together and worked in the same unit. You had to agree to never partner. You had to name legal guardians who custody would go to should something happen to the two of you and both of you were setting up accounts so if something happened any money would go into it for either the other to use for expenses or to keep for her. 

“Yeah. Stella and Kelly are good choices” they were your pick for legal guardians and after considering it Jay had agreed. When you approached them Stella had cried, Kelly shook Jay’s hand and told him “I hope it never comes to it but know we’ll take care of her if it does”

You felt his eyes on you through two traffic lights so when the third was red you cut your eyes at him “It’s rude to stare” he grinned “I was thinking” you cut him off with a groan “Last time you said those words to me I ended up getting pregnant” 

He laughed “Oh I remember…but no I was thinking how much things have changed. We’re parents talking about living wills and choosing guardians for our daughter…it’s insane” you nodded, turning the jeep into the parking lot where all of intelligence used “Especially when you remember there’s still so much more coming”

He knew what you meant because he nodded “Should be around the second week of August” you swallowed hard before parking next to Adam’s car and killing the engine. You cut your eyes at him “That’s still months away. I’m not worrying about that bridge until I get to it. The elephant is eaten best one bite at a time”

“You can tell you’ve gotten back in with Dr Charles” he teased with a small smile before you both climbed out the jeep to head towards the back entrance that led up. He bumped his shoulder against yours as you walked across the parking lot and added “Just remember when you get to that bridge I’m with you no matter what. If you need help with it, I’m there” 

“I know Jay” you assured him with a smile before he grabbed the door and held it open for you so you ducked under his arm to step inside and he walked in after you. 

@desimarie12

@allisonargent144

@nevaehstreater18

[juniperhillpatient]

Writing is so funny because u can explore ur trauma & issues & deepest fears but it’s never ever in the ways people would think. It’s subtle. It’s nuanced. It’s about vibes more than literal events. If u read my stories with the impression I was using writing to dissect my issues??? Well you’d probably walk away thinking I have an entirely separate set of issues from what I actually have.

[unriding]

me n moze say good morning to the world !!! ᕙ( •̀ ᗜ •́ )ᕗ

art by @rabbbitseason of course <3

[danothan]

Just reading some comics and saw a panel I thought you might like. :)

ah fuck, characters reminiscing always get to me ;__;

but i will never ever get over that fond way these two talk to and abt each other. especially when they’re poking fun, you can just hear the love in their voice it’s SICK.

the halbarry love language is annoying each other, but even more than that, it’s being each other’s exceptions

[butwhatifidothis]

(regarding the Fort Merceus scene)

"Claude doesn't know as much about the Seiros faith because he's an outsider" thanks for ignoring the entire point of Claude's route just to insist he doesn't grow as a character

Ohhh wait, no, it's not that he's not knowledgeable, it's just him definitely lying! Because disagreements? Regarding tenets of a religion? Impossible! Claude must be feigning ignorance and lying because that's all he does as a character! He's tricking the diligent Lorenz into thinking things that aren't true, because Church Bad and Claude would never tell the truth!

[covington-shenanigans]

christ alive I love my parents and I'm glad I got to see them but they are just. so fucking exhausting

[girlivealwaysbean]

it's not sinking in that today might be the last day in my house and town for many months to come