#but mordred was still an innocent boy

[adhd-merlin]

you know, if arthur had ever come to know that merlin considered letting a literal child die to save his life, however briefly, he would have been horrified. even if mordred did end up killing him. that's just not what arthur was about

[larluce]

Arthur and Merlin travel back in time without knowing the other is from the future too AU

LINKS TO THE OTHER PARTS OF THIS AU HERE: PARTE 1 , PARTE 2 , PARTE 3, PARTE 4 , PART5 (you're here) , PARTE 6

In "The Beginning of the End"

Morgana: Merlin! I need your help.

Merlin: (worried) What is it?

Morgana: Just come with me (brings Merlin to her chambers and shows him Mordred behind the screen)

Merlin: (Who's been ignoring Mordred's calls for help in his mind on purpose and still hates him to guts for what he did to Arthur in his timeline, trying to remain compose) That's... That's the druid boy.

Morgana: (Who did hear Mordred calls for help and helped him instead) He's injured. If we don't give him medical attention he'll die.

Merlin: (almost histerical) If Uther finds out you've been hiding the druid boy in your chambers you'll die! We'll all die! What were you thinking?!

Morgana: I couldn't just leave him! He's just a child! He's innocent!

Merlin: To Uther he's guilty.

Morgana: And to you he is? He has done no harm. His only crime is having magic. Do you think he deserves to be executed for that?

Merlin: ... No. Of course not.

Morgana: Then help me. Just tend his wound. Please. (puppy eyes)

Merlin: (Still full of resentment to Arthur's future murderer, but loving Morgana too much to deny her anything. Sighs) Alright.

...

Morgana: Arthur. To what do I owe this pleasure?

Arthur: (enters her chambers) Where is him?

Morgana: Who?

Arthur: I know you're hiding him Morgana.

Morgana: I don't know what you're talking about.

Arthur: Well, I need to search your chambers, kings orders. (starts searching)

Morgana: You will not do such a thing! Stop messing up my things!

Arthur: (opens the screen where Merlin and Mordred are hiding) So this is where you've been lazing around.

Merlin: Sorry 😅

Arthur: (To Morgana) You drag him into this, I can't believe you! Do you know the risk you're putting yourself in?

Morgana: Arthur, please! (putting herself between Arthur and Mordred) Don't turn him in. I beg you, he's just a child.

Arthur: (who resents Mordred, not really because he tried to kill him, that part just hurt him, but because Merlin had to make the deal with the sidhes and was turned into a tree due to what Mordred did in his timeline) I'm sorry I have no choice. I can hide your involvement in this. No harm will come to you or Merlin. Now step aside. (Morgana doesn't move) Morgana.

Morgana: You'll have to go throught me first!

Arthur: I'm trying to protect you.

Morgana: If you hand him over, I'll never forgive you.

Arthur: (Conflicted cause he still have mixed feelings about Mordred but doesn't want Morgana to hate him again. Looks at Merlin for answers, but Merlin's avoiding his eyes at all cost)...

Morgana: We can take him out of Camelot, back to his people. He'll be safe there and Uther will stop searching for him eventually.

Arthur: This is treason. If my father finds out-

Morgana: He won't. Not if you help us. Arthur, please. (puppy eyes)

Arthur: (sighs, giving up) We'll have to be careful. And I'm not doing this again, you hear me?

Morgana: (jumps happily and hugs him) Thank you, thank you, thank you! You're going to be a great king one day. I know it!

Arthur: Yeah, yeah whatever 🙄(but he smiles and hugs back)

Merlin: (touched by the scene and very proud of Arthur despite his feelings towards Mordred) I agree. You'll be the greatest king of all.

Arthur: (separating from Morgana's hug and extending his arms at Merlin to which Merlin just looks at him confused) So?

Merlin: So?

Arthur: Where's my gratitude hug?

Merlin: (shocked)... what? 😳

Morgana: (Who already knows something is going on) Oh, don't be shy (pushes Merlin towards Arthur)

Merlin: (wraps his arms around Arthur hesitantly, but Arthur presses Merlin to him instanly and Merlin melts in the hug)

Morgana: (thinking) Awww. Next time I'll just have Merlin seduce him into doing stuff. It'll work faster.

[merlinmylove]

I always find it so funny (in a heartbreaking way) when Arthur says “why didn’t you tell me?”

like dude ??

Merlin’s entire existence is outlawed

he was born a crime

how could he have, especially if Uther was still alive?

I understand Arthur feels betrayed and hurt because Merlin didn’t trust him but cmon let’s look at the show

Merlin has been sent to the stocks and the dungeons for being late with breakfast and missing laundry — what would the punishment be if he told the Crown Prince he was a traitor to the kingdom? Banishment, death, or worse? And what if Uther found out?

I don’t think Arthur would’ve killed Merlin, but he would’ve sent him away or hated himself for harbouring a sorcerer — he’s now a hypocrite for putting one person above the law while his father burns druid children

Gaius would’ve been hanged by association, and his mother killed for having concealed a dragonlord (let alone giving birth to another one)

Gwen was arrested twice on suspicion of sorcery, and Uther ordered her pyre built — the only reason she didn’t burn is because 1.Morgana spoke in her favour and, 2. Another sorcerer took the blame

(I love arthur so much but why does he never consider the fact that the love of his life and future queen, was almost innocently executed twice because there is no way of confirming she didn’t use magic — because how does one prove a negative?)

And I doubt Gwen is the first and only person to be falsely accused of sorcery, but she’s the one of few who had friends in high places who were willing to defy the King in order to save her life

If a Kings word is law then why even bother with a trial?

We’ve seen several times that Witchfinders or Druid catchers can steal people (probably citizens from other kingdoms) and earn a living by selling them to the King of Camelot

(and i don’t belive for a second every one of them had magic or were druids. Besides, the whole court now believes the witchfinder to be a fraud, so why does no one think about the future people accused of magic — how does one prove it?)

Mordred was hunted throughout the kingdom for a week simply for being born a druid (neither the King nor Arthur had any way of knowing if he actually had magic, he was simply guilty for existing within the borders of Camelot)

(Arthur risked everything in order to save the little druid boy — i wish this was spoken about more in the show but alas. Also, Gaius mentioned that Uther drowned several children — why does no one in the show discuss this? Does Arthur not know?

We know he feels immense guilt and grief over the raid in the druid camp he led and he did atone for it. I love Bradley’s acting in that scene, his voice breaks as he accepts the reality of what he has been apart of

Merlin saw all this. He lived all of it. How could he have told Arthur he had magic and expected a good outcome? He wanted to, multiple times — but the risk of banishment was too great.

But what about after Arthur is King? How could Merlin tell Arthur he has magic after Uther dies from magic, Morgana has gone mad from magic, and Aggrevaine betrayed him? Merlin could not bring himself to add more betrayal and heartbreak onto Arthur

I adore when fanfic discusses these aspects of the show and actually talks in detail about the horror Uther caused for over 20 years

Make Arthur think for himself and come to terms with what his father did, and also what his own legacy now is

Make Mordred, Morgana, Gaius, and Merlin talk about the horrors of the purge, and the the fear of living under Uthers rule

Make Gwen speak of what she experienced when she, and her father, were wrongly accused of a crime they didn’t commit — they were going to burn innocently, just like those children Uther killed

By Uthers logic Magic corrupts. It is a power one seeks out and must be studied. It is an evil — if that is the case then why did he allow Gaius to remain at court, and privately attend the king and his children? Surely Gaius would be corrupted by now…unless magic does not always corrupt…

I want Arthur to ask himself these questions— why was Gaius (the Kings friend) allowed to stay alive if he simply promised not to use magic again? Why were those innocent druid children not given the same choice?

Arthur asks himself several times if Magic is always evil, or if it can be used for good — and some times it’s almost successful, but in the end it’s like a catch 22 — Arthur sees (mostly) magic being used for evil so therefore it must be evil

I don’t want Merlin to be angry with Arthur or to have a screaming match with him — but I do love when Merlin passively aggressively sets the record straight

The canon answer he gives is “you would’ve chopped my head off” is perfect in my opinion because YES death always a possibility

Especially if Uther found out

(i don’t think Merlin is entirely blameless of course, he could’ve tried harder to sow the seed of doubt in arthur’s mind that maybe magic is not always evil — like after morgause or when arthur requested magic to heal his father, or when magic saves gwens life)

(if only merlin was braver, if only gaius was bolder, if only aggrevaine didn’t betray him, if only gwen spoke up, if only if only if only)

i love these boys so much and i love the angst and arthur’s heartbreak is so painful and merlin’s guilt is all-consuming

thank god for fanfic lol

but anyways this is my rant because i’m bored at my family christmas dinner so

[inalandofsadclowns]

So. Merlin in The Beginning of the End. Was he or was he not supposed to parallel Uther?

Uther sounded pitifully insane and paranoid with how much he repeated the same bigoted idea over and over. "That druid boy only wants to see my kingdom destroyed" and so on. Uther wouldn't be able to tell, how the little druid would get there, but he takes no chances. But how less insane would Merlin sound if someone asked why he was going to let the guards find Mordred? Well, the dragon under my home told me. He swears the kid's gonna destroy Arthur one day. No idea how and why, but he will. Anyway, the dragon did a jumpscare on me last time I visited and I'm still having hiccups-

Uther judged an innocent druid boy based on crimes he never committed or showed signs of wanting to, but Merlin was also about to let that innocent druid boy die because of the prospect of a crime that boy never committed or showed signs of wanting to.

And obviously both Uther and Merlin only wanted to protect something dear to them, but they both clearly were willing to overlook something terrible, in order to prevent something so terrible it's unthinkable to them.

[kateis-cakeis]

Okay okay thinking about it, really thinking about it. My post from the other day (here) I said "you see him slip into this version of himself that is hardly recognisable, even when you compare him to his characterisation in S4" talking about S5 Merlin.

And then I really thought about, okay but what if say S1 Merlin was put into S5 Merlin's shoes, would he do any different? Would he?

Honestly, think about it.

Let's take him at the end of S1, where he was ready to give up his life for Arthur completely to save him. I mean sure he did that in S1Ep4, and tried to do it in S1Ep11, but Ep13 is where it really hits. He said goodbye after all.

This is a Merlin that was ready to tell Arthur about his magic, but was locked out of the possibility after Will lied as he died to protect him.

This is a Merlin who already tried to kill Mordred. Or well, let him die really. Not so much kill.

So let's look at lines from S1EP8 about Mordred dying vs Arthur dying, shall we? ...

"Would you let something terrible happen if it meant you'd stop something even worse happening in the future?"

"One of them's bad, really bad. And the other, it's...unthinkable."

"For once, you don't have to worry. I'm going to do nothing."

I cut out Gaius's replies because Merlin's lines are more important here. The 'something terrible' and the one that's 'bad, really bad' refer to letting Mordred be executed.

Meanwhile the 'something even worse' and 'it's unthinkable' refer to Arthur's death in the future.

He decides to do nothing as we know, he decides to let Mordred die, right up until Mordred pleads with him through telepathy.

That's the S1 Merlin we're dealing with.

Maybe if you took him from Ep1 or pre-S1 yeah he'd act differently, but S1 Merlin is as much defined by Arthur's impending death as S5 Merlin is.

The only difference is between them, S1 Merlin has destiny propelling him forward just a little more than S5 Merlin does. Whether by love or sheer dedication, S5 Merlin is even prepared to push aside his own freedom to save Arthur's life, just to condemn Mordred to death.

Would S1 Merlin do any different?

No, no I don't think he would. Not if he saw the vision, not if he saw Arthur fall.

S5 Merlin is defined by what he saw in the pool, he's defined by seeing what he believes is Arthur's death (not yet knowing he would survive for days after acquiring that wound)

If S1 Merlin, or even S2, 3, or 4 saw that same vision? I don't think they would do any differently.

Maybe he had more hope earlier on, sure, but that would be missing the way that S5 Merlin hopes. He tells both Mordred and Finna that it "won't always be like this". He hopes for freedom as much as S1 Merlin does, he's just more prepared to prioritise Arthur.

But isn't that what he's always done? S2, when he struggles to lie, but still does lie to Arthur about Morgause and his mother - He's thanked for reminding Arthur that sorcerers are evil.

The way he acts just before telling the lie is so similar to his expressions when he's about say "There can be no place for magic in Camelot" in S5Ep5.

That's the thing. I know I bang on about how S5 Merlin is so much darker and he is, he grew up after all. But I truly think if S1 Merlin saw that vision, nothing would have changed.

Nothing. Not even his actions with the Disir. Why would he, if there's a chance to try and kill Mordred Merlin always took it. Or tried to as much as he could.

S2 Merlin, put in S5 Merlin's shoes, might even edge closer to murder, that man tripped that kid up in the hope that two guards would kill him, and instead watched as Mordred killed the guards instead.

What, Merlin was innocent back in earlier seasons? That boy, that man, he was never innocent, man was down to murder from his very first day in Camelot.

So yes, S5 Merlin has ten years give or take of saving Arthur and setting aside his freedom, and that did indeed darken him and change him and mould him, but S1 Merlin already had enough experience that nothing would change.

Merlin was always going to condemn Mordred, he barely knew him early on after all, and later, he already had the knowledge of the vision.

Let's not forget that in S5, Merlin says he likes Mordred, but that he can't ignore what he saw. That he can't save the life of a man destined to kill Arthur, that he can't ignore what the dragon said. That Finna was right, he cannot trust Mordred, not after all he's been told.

I don't think any Merlin could do any differently if he was told all that, and shown Camlann.

There's no such thing as an innocent Merlin, not when it comes to Arthur's life. We can say he became too blinded, but in S4 he killed Agravaine, used dark magic to lock away Morgana's magic for a time, and took away Arthur's free will. S3 is a little harder, but he did command Kilgharrah against his will. S2 Merlin is easy, he tried to kill Mordred, and morbidly held Morgana as she was dying to the water he poisoned. S1 Merls is just people dying left and bloody right. Nimueh, god should we ever forget about the way he killed Nimueh. She fucking exploded.

All this to say, S5 Merlin didn't abandon his values because he already did that when they all first met Mordred. He just became more and more set, darker and darker over time. But if any version of himself was given that vision by the Vates, it's over, it's so over, because that's all it took.

To see Arthur fall, that's all it took. It's all it would ever take.

[mxcrayon]

what gets me is the fact that merlin starts the show as a sweet, innocent boy trying to do what's right, and throughout the show he gets so burdened with making decisions, picking sides, choosing his battles, protecting arthur, the path forward is almost never clear and he never knows if he's doing the right thing but he pushes through regardless bc inaction is worse than all of it

he ends up turning on morgana, turning on mordred, he fails to help the druids, he fails to save other magic users, all in the name of camelot and of protecting arthur and his part in a brighter future

and he knows that he's making mistakes and hurting people, but he still keeps digging himself deeper into the hole every season bc at every turn there's no way back and it's now or never

what gets me is how much it reminds me of uther. they're on different sides of a war yet their actions aren't different at all.

uther was once no enemy to magic, but found himself scared and angry and not knowing what was best for his people, and so he shut out and got rid of everything that was a risk to him, to his kingdom, to arthur. isn't that what all of merlin is? merlin becoming terrified of everything which posed a potential threat to camelot, and to arthur, and defeating all of it? it's as gwen says, "your words mean nothing if your actions betray you". maybe merlin felt guiltier than uther did, or maybe his intentions were purer, but to an outsider, it sure looks a lot like merlin is just continuing uther's work (which a LOT of characters have said to his face throughout the show)

and anyway, we know for a fact uther felt extremely guilty, due to him being haunted by the ghosts of the people he'd killed, and we know that he was doing it out of some misguided love for camelot, due to him literally constantly saying "they would see this kingdom fall" which is merlin's exact argument for killing nearly every sorcerer he comes across

tragic, really, when you go back to s1 and see how young merlin was at the start of all this

[meowww-ffxiv]

About Meowdred's transformation.

.

Thancred: Oh. It's again?

Mordred: Yeah it's again.

Thancred phoning Estinien: Hey bud, don't freak out about Mr. Meow.

Estinien: I see. It's again.

Theodore: It is, indeed, again.

.

Erenville: I owe you an apology.

Mordred: Thanks. I'm kind of scared to hear it.

Erenville: I thought you were Theodore's new--

Mordred: ERENVILLE. IT'S ME. THE GUILDSHIP'S RESPECTABLE CRAFTER. I'M NOT THAT BASTARD'S BOY TOY.

Erenville: You have an amazing tendency to put words into people's mouths very loudly. Thank you for the clarification, though.

Mordred: Will you also explain this to whatever foreign dignitary got here with you.

Erenville: I doubt it is necessary, considering she probably heard your cry for innocence loud and clear in the next room over.

Mordred: WHAT.

.

G'raha: Are you comfortable in that form?

Mordred: Yeah, surprisingly. And you know what?

G'raha: Yes?

Mordred: You and me, we really were at a cute size. 😩 *petpet*

G'raha: x3

G'raha: Don't try that on Krile, though.

Mordred: Of course. I would still like to be allowed back into the Baldesion Annex. But! Do you have anything on tall shelves you need to grab? 👀

.

Tataru: It's again!!! Stay RIGHT there. I need to get you the clothes I have saved up for when this happens!

Mordred: You saved up clothes for when I'm TALL?

Tataru: Oh hush, you. You're far more willing to try on nice clothes when you are in this form!

Mordred: >_> Okay. True.

.

Y'shtola: Hmph. You seem no different to me.

Mordred: Are you daring me to point out the obvious?

Y'shtola: Whatever do you mean?

Urianger: Thou art winsome in this form, Mordred, although 'tis the prevailing truth of thine character.

Theodore: Perhaps, but like this, people have no idea he is our Mister Meowdred. They have all sorts of silly ambitions, such that they flirt and approach him with unwholesome intentions.

Mordred: Theodore here's real spooked because Emmanellain tried to make a pass at me.

Y'shtola: I thought he prefers women.

Mordred: I told him someone with his personality can't afford to be picky and I think he's kinda taken it to heart.

Theodore: YOU turn the fuckboy bisexual?!?!?

Mordred: No! I said that in relation to Sicard.

Theodore: I suppose Ishgard loses nothing if he does not enter into an arrangement that would warrant a true-born child...

Urianger: Vicious thou art, Theodore. 😒

.

Mordred: Are you ACTUALLY going to escort me?

Theodore: Frankly, no. Though it does warm me to see you more confident. You carry yourself differently in your true body.

Mordred: I'm sure. I dragged myself through the gods know how many rough patches. This one... The old aches remain. But it is a nice change, while it lasts.

Theodore: Do you hate the way you were?

Mordred: No! Being cute and catty got me further than I would've ever made as a hyur or an elezen.

Theodore: Well thank you for the frank acknowledgement of your feline psychological manipulation.

[1shadowhole]

Yeah, it's so OOC. It was episode 11. I went and looked for it because maybe I exaggerated the event in my head, but it's just as weird, if not more, as I remembered.

Here Merlin is SHAMED for always putting Arthur first. Which is something that happens even in Merthur fics, because it is highly unhealthy. But it does it without any respect as to why.

Not the way Merlin was manipulated by the dragon, Druids, events, and even Gaius. Not the way Merlin has suffered the consequences every time he doesn't (think of the Freya episode). And not the way he was essentially tortured by guilt and madness for 1500. Which was actually talked about in detail in earlier episodes.

Here they make me hate Morgana... Even though they tried to redeem her. And it was kinda working on me before all of THIS happened.

"looks like I'll always come last for everyone"

Yes girly, because all of this shit is your fault in the first place. You have no right to speak... this is karma coming to get you.

Nah instead she just manipulates Merlin. And because everyone does it anyway, Mordred joins in.

"Going to sacrifice another innocent person for your King?"

You also have no right to speak. Also, that's not an innocent person. Still, he uses millennia of guilt on the broken shell of a man.

Also not only OG Merlin (post-S4) wouldn't have hesitated to do just that, but THIS Merlin from 2 episodes ago wouldn't have either.

They went into detail about how much he suffered without Arthur. He went mad! BECAUSE OF Morgana and Mordred. I know character development is a good thing, but this character development is "well he is in love with Morgana now". Sigh. I am at least happy for the Mergana shippers out there. But I can't see it happening.

The time Merlin sacrificed Morgana comes up. Which is something I will always defend Merlin for. What was my boy supposed to do in that situation? So... Is he supposed to sacrifice innocents (the entirety of Camelot) for the sake of one person (in this case Morgana) or what? You are contradicting yourself, script.

Also, they use Arthur's words against him lmao! When he meant that Merlin should try to save himself. Not to sacrifice himself for him. It was a sweet moment and you ruined it for me T.T

So yeah he left Arthur to die.

This isn't saying "I'll have to trust in the skill of my King" or "I'll have to trust Arthur will win".

No no no. He is not putting any faith in Arthur. He knows Arthur would die.

He doesn't trust Arthur. He trusts that somehow Avalon will protect him. For some reason.

To be clear, that's not something that happened in the past. Merlin, like us, has no surety that Arthur can be saved and healed after his return. As far as we're aware this is the last shot he has. If he dies he dies.

This isn't Merlin growing out of his obsession with Arthur. It's swapping it with an obsession for another person. He also learned the important lesson of... "have faith that everything will just turn out fine"

Which is a horrible lesson to learn for anyone. But especially for him. Because nothing ever turned out fine for him! Every time he did his life went to shit! Just because the script decides that this time it DOES, it still goes against one of the main themes of the original show.

I didn't want to tear into this when I started, but reading through it reminded me just why I didn't like it (there are other reasons. The knights and Gwen also go through character assassination... Literally and figuratively. I'll never forgive them for what they did to my sweet Gwen. I'm not the biggest Gwen fan and it hurts me still. Also, she's not in a love triangle anymore! You'll be glad to know she's in a love QUADRILATERAL now. Ain't that just great?)

Also, I wouldn't dare to do this to any other fan work. No matter how much it made me furious. But the writers of this went above and beyond to let us know that they MEANT for this to be canonized and they sent it to the writers.

They also went above and beyond to convince people that this IS the canon ending of the show. Which I never liked. A lot of people genuinely think that it is. So the makers of this PUT THEMSELVES to the level of the canon show. Which in my eyes allows me to criticize KC the way I'd criticize the show. You no longer have Fanwork protection. You elevated yourself above it... Since... Idk... Fanworks aren't as important I suppose?

Guys. Guys.

As the Death Aniversary comes closer and closer, I see people talking about how happy they are that AT LEAST, the showrunners put down the script for the last season.

So it is time. It is time for the annual reminder that Kingdom Come is not the canonical season 6.

Merlin has no canonical season 6. It probably never will.

Regardless of your opinion of the piece, it was not written by the writers. It was not meant to air. It was not the original plan for the show. These and more affirmations often get shared, but it's just fake news.

It was written by fans. It's fanfiction in theatrical form.

[howlingday]

I a got Arc spirits ask for you...hopefully it's a good idea.

Mordred before being captured....wounded, beaten, carrying a broken blade with a gem in the hilt. In his last moments before capture grips the gem citing his regrets, grievances, his message to future arcs and lastly....the vow he took to be a blade for those forgetten by the light to hunt those lurk in shadows.....before finally using the last of his strength to throw it the gem shining red as it seemingly disappears into the air.

I decided to go a bit dark with this one, so, uh... fair warning.

---------------------------------------------------

Jaune: Hey, Dad?

Papa Arc: Hm?

Jaune: I was looking through the archives, and I noticed something. The Arc family dates back the warriors of our family from you to great-great-grandpa, but I can't find anything after except the first Arc. Did we lose it?

Papa Arc: (Sighs) I think you're old enough. Come, it's time you learned about the Arcs. All of the Arcs.

---------------------------------------------------

"Mordred!" Joan called out. "Get over here right now!" No answer. "I'm going to count to three!" Still no answer. She took a deep breath. "UN! DE-"

A young Mordred Arc arrived at the doorstep before she could finish. He grumbled and dug his toe into the ground, refusing to meet her gaze.

"The Winchester girl and her mother were just here." Joan leaned down. "Were you throwing rocks at people again."

" 'S not my fault." Mordred grumbled. "If people were stronger, I wouldn't have to tough 'em up."

"Oh, you think you're stronger?" Joan grabbed his ear, making the boy wince in pain. "I'll show ya real strength, and I'll make sure you learn this time!"

Mordred Arc was, in the eyes of many, a bad child. He was rude, and violent, and killed and ate small animals like a savage instead of returning home. Mordred Arc was the first and only son of the Arc family.

---------------------------------------------------

Papa Arc: Your great-great-great-grandpa is purposefully locked away in the archives. He was... not a hero.

Jaune: What do you mean?

Papa Arc: He fought his own family and tormented innocents when he was younger, and fought for no one but himself on the battlefield.

Jaune: He... does sound awful.

Papa Arc: The first Arc denied him Crocea Mors, because he was deemed unworthy to weild it.

Jaune: Really? Then what did he use?

Papa Arc: (Opens secret door, Enters small room)

Jaune: (Follows, Mouth agape at the rusted toothed-cleaver hung on the wall)

Papa Arc: Sanguis Mors. The Cleaver of Nightmares. The weapon used by Mordred Arc to slaughter innocents.

---------------------------------------------------

Mordred stood in his home, staring at Sanguis Mors as it hung on the wall. He reached out and dragged his hands across the blade, smiling at the memories. The tyrants he cut. The murderers he bled. The beating of his heart in his ears as his Battle Lust took over.

Then came the less pleasant memories. His friends staring at him with terror. The innocent civilians who witnessed his actions and called him a monster. The chilling voice of his mother as she chastised him one last time.

"You are no Arc. You are an untamed and unruly beast. You are unfit to weild Crocea Mors."

A knock at his door awoke him from his stupor, and his daughter from her nap. He walked past the door to the bedroom to find his daughter being soothed by his love, who cooed and shushed the child.

"I have her." Morgan said. "See who's at the door."

Mordred nodded. In all his travels, he fought many men. He killed monsters more. He lay with... a number of women, who were drunk enough to accept him. But no one held him the way Morgana Fey held him.

Their first meeting was like a fairy tale. Hero fights monster, hero kills monster, damsel is rescued, damsel smacks hero for killing her game, hero offers to cook, damsel and hero become friends, damsel proves she's tough than the hero, hero instantly falls for the damsel. His mother was against the sudden union, but she relented after meeting her soon-to-be daughter-in-law.

Mordred opened the door and found a lanky, but lean man, covered in sweat as his snake tail waved anxiously. His hair was disheveled despite how much he slicked it down to his neck, and on his collar, his pendant of a snake circling a garden bounced against his chest.

"Yon?" Mordred asked. "I thought you were in Menagerie."

"Mordred, please!" Yon gasped, swallowing air as it entered. "Please, help me! They've captured my family in Mistral. They intend to kill my children if I do not submit."

"Who, Yon?" Mordred asked, feeling anxious himself. "Who would imprison your family?"

"A tyrant." Yon replied. "He calls himself the King of Rats! Please, Mordred," he fell to his knees, tears hitting the ground at Mordred's feet, "please, save my family!"

Mordred looked inside, where his wife entered from the bedroom. Her belly was swollen with her second child, and her breast was feeding her first. She looked helpless, so defenseless, until he looked in her eyes, which were all but those. With a nod, Mordred reached on his other side and pulled free Sanguis Mors.

Mordred reached a hand out to Yon, who looked up with tears. "Show me this 'King of Rats'."

---------------------------------------------------

Papa Arc: He abandoned his unborn son, who would one day grow up to become your own great-great-grandfather, to serve his own selfish cause.

Jaune: (Looking over the document) Who was his friend? This "Yon"?

Papa Arc: Yon the Butcher. He betrayed his own people to open a trade-line with Mistral. When his people called for help from the pirates who raided their trade lines, he turned his back on them. But when Mistral came for his head, he abandoned his family to recruit Mordred.

Jaune: Not exactly the best friend.

Papa Arc: No, and where he found a beast, he awoke a demon.

---------------------------------------------------

"Over here!"

Mordred climbed the hill to meet with Yon, who stood by with a grin. He looked back to the path his Battle Lust had taken him. The bodies cut open or cleaved apart by Sanguis Mors. He smiled. It was fewer bodies this time.

"Just beyond the wall." Yon said with a grin. "Climb over it, and you'll be closer saving my family!"

"Save your thanks for after they're safe, my friend." Mordred replied. "I'll let you know when the gate is open, and it's safe to enter."

"Of course, my friend."

Mordred buried his blade into the old stone of the fortress, pulling himself higher with his other hand in empty brick holes close by.

As he climbed, a thought occured to him. The men he fought were few in number, especially for someone who is referred to as "the king of rats". And how quickly he and his friend had reunited after the battle with no enemy reinforcements was also concerning. Even the climb was easy! As he swung over the wall, he feared he was dropping into...

"Spears! Up!"

An ambush! Mordred looked around, finding himself surrounded by dozens, if not a hundred soldiers, armed with an array of weapons. Spears, swords, axes, clubs, bows- everything meant to harm him was there, all surrounding a smug figure wearing a golden crown.

"Ah, the hero of the day!" The king smiled. "Mordred Arc, the Slayer of Men. My father spoke highly of your strength, but more so true of your wit." He looked to the side. Mordred followed his gaze to the gate, where he saw Yon wave at them. The king waved in return. "Such a good man. A pity a beast like yourself couldn't resist the temptation of tasting blood, but what else is to be expected of the monster who killed my brother?!"

Mordred felt a pain in his heart as he watched Yon leave. He was a close friend; the only friend he had left from his days of battle, and he had betrayed him. Sanguis Mors dipped low to the ground.

"Now the people are free once again! The king of rats shall take his throne as the Hero of Mistral!"

Mordred huffed once. Then again. Then his huff became laughs. An eager soldier stabbed him with his spear, right in Mordred's abdomen. Mordred took the spear by the wooden shaft and crushed it in his palm, bellowing a loud laugh. His eyes flashed silver.

"So you've caught me, hero? Then you should be ready to pay the price to do it!"

Mordred lept into battle, ready to put his blades to the dogs who conspired in Yon's betrayal. Sanguis Mors found purchase in a vanguard's shield, before Mordred launched himself over the battalion, and right to the king.

---------------------------------------------------

Jaune: So it was a trap from the start. (Starting on the fourth pile) What happened to great-great-grandpa?

Papa Arc: He was forced to flee with his mother and sisters. Seen to Mordred betrayed, Yon escaped and warned a local mercenary battalion to raze the village to the ground, using the same gold to pay for the unjust assault.

Jaune: But... why?

Papa Arc: I couldn't say. Perhaps he feared the consequence and sought to buy time in Mordred's grief. Perhaps he sought to salt Mordred's wounds for some betrayal from before. In whatever case, for whatever reason, he should have known that a devil like Mordred weeps for no one.

---------------------------------------------------

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" Mordred wailed as he held his mother in his arms, her ashened skin flaking from his palms. She had died a heroes death, killing many others before taking her own life in a decision to burn as many bastards as she could before her passing. A column of burning wood collapsed, striking Mordred from above and knocking him unconcious.

He awoke later with a cough as he heard the howls of demons themselves. The damned mercenaries remained to laugh at the burning village, revelling in their revolting "entertainment" of murder, theft, and rape.

Tears fell from his eyes as he thought of his wife. His daughter. His unborn child. His mother.

"Looks like that hag that killed the old boss is properly buried now, eh?" One of them laughed.

"Hey, now, that's dangerous!" One of the others mockingly warned. "Here, let me help you put out that fire!"

New laughter erupted as cold liquid crawled closer to Mordred, his burning body's open wounds screaming from the sudden invasion of filth. These bastards- These animals did not deserve to breathe! Let alone breathe of his mother!

Wood creaked and snapped as Mordred pushed himself from the ground, surprising the cretins standing closest to him. With a quick swipe of his hands, his knuckles cracked against the faces of the pissing men, catching the attention of all the others. Scanning the horde, he found their leader sitting atop a heap of goods, surrounded by the defiled corpses of the villagers he once knew.

"Who the hell are you?!" It barked.

Mordred didn't answer. He couldn't stand to. He stepped closer, his eyes blazing. Any man who attacked was disposed of without much effort. Soon, he was standing before the king of filth, terror in his eyes. And with a blink, he was no more.

He turned to the others, now running in terror. Mordred returned to the house, remembering their faces, and dug out Sanguis Mors. He could still see their silhouettes in the night.

Mordred had heard of a new class of warrior. Those who dedicated themselves to the defense and protection of those who could not do so themselves. Before this day, he never considered them. But tonight?

Tonight, he would hunt men.

---------------------------------------------------

Jaune: ...What? That's it? Is that all?

Papa Arc: That is all that is on record, Jaune. So, tell me, Jaune. What are your thoughts on the Arcs darkest history? On the monster who taints our family name.

Jaune: I think... you're too hard on him.

Papa Arc: Excuse me?

Jaune: I think you were too hard on him. True, he was a schoolyard bully, but he grew out of it by the time he had his firstborn child.

Papa Arc: How can you be so sure?

Jaune: There's nothing written between then and when he was recruited. He must have lived a quiet life if there's nothing between his youth and when he was recruited years later.

Papa Arc: By Yon the Butcher.

Jaune: Who was his friend. I'm sure he saw Yon as a good man, and was heartbroken by his betrayal.

Papa Arc: ...Are you telling me Mordred Arc, the black sheep of our family, the demon who slaughtered dozens, if not hundreds of warriors, including his own allies, is not evil?

Jaune: Evil is subjective, Dad, and looking back on it, I think it might have been a semblance. Some of the records say he "had a red glow about him" when his bloodlust started. In the right context, he could have been a great hero.

Papa Arc: (Nods) You pass.

Jaune: Huh?

Papa Arc: There is one final piece that I have hidden from you. It is in regards to Mordred's fate before he passed. (Walks to a drawer) Tell me, son. How familiar are you with Echo Dust?

Jaune: Well, Weiss told me it's what scrolls are built around. Something about talking into it, and an echo returning.

Papa Arc: Yes, and I have the last Echo Dust used by Mordred Arc. (Pulls out Echo Dust) It was found by your great-grandfather when he returned to the village. We have kept it ever since. And now, I believe you are ready. (Taps the Echo Dust)

---------------------------------------------------

Mordred panted as he runs across the plains. The pelting rain showered over him, soaking him to the bone. Coming to the cress of the hill, he dropped to the ground into the destroyed village village below. Running through the shattered remains of the hamlet, he hides around a corner, steadying his breath.

A black shadow looms by, and he stops breathing. The monster, with skin paler than the moon, eyes redder than hot iron, and a soul blacker than any Grimm before, passed by him in it's slow stalk through the town.

As it searched inside a house, far outside of Mordred's view, and he quietly moved away, moving closer to the town's entrance, away from the beast. Ahead, he saw another Grimm, much smaller than his predator, serving as a guard. Rather than risking his being spotted, he ducked into a house, through a crack in the walls.

Surrounded, with no escape, Mordred pulled out the glowing, white stone. He found it amongst the mercenary's loot, long ago. The irony of using it in this same vilagge made him sick with rage, but he swallowed it down. And with a gulp, he began.

"My name... is Mordred Arc." He glances up, watching a Grimm patrol outside. "And this... is my end. I have made many enemies, and mistakes many more. I have let my lust for battle blind me to my companions and to the love I put in danger. If you are a man of most ghoulish intentions, then know that I am hunted by a creature far more foul. But, if you are the more finer warrior, more worthy to be called an Arc than I, then know that I trust you to do the right thing. In the past, they have called me Mordred the Black, or Mordred the Tainted, and much, much worse, but know that I did what I did because I believe the worst crimes deserve the worst punishment. And if this is an Arc who listens, then know this..."

The door screams as it is ripped from it's hinges. The devil that hunts him, the monster most foul who has been stalking him, was now mere feet away. Though her gait and stride were woman, her heart was evil of the most ill design. It smiled and cooed like a mother playing with her child. "There you are."

"...This is my end."

Mordred dropped the stone, and charged one last time.

[weakforarwen]

I honestly can't get over how terrible Merlin's decisions are, bless his heart:

He refused to kill Morgana because she wasn't evil, but he also refused to help her, so she went evil anyway, and then he refused to kill her even though she was evil, because he didn't want to make anyone feel sad. Sad's better than dead, Merlin.

He also refused to kill Mordred, an innocent boy, at first, but then a season later was like, Nah, he's still just a boy who got manipulated and used by adults, but I'll kill him anyway because he's powerful and scary and planning something; except, Merlin's incredibly inept at killing people, so Mordred lived. When, at last, he met the boy as a man (teenager??), he still wanted him dead, but he'd really just rather the boy dropped dead on his own. Perhaps if he glared hard enough, Mordred would die? When it finally seemed like Mordred might die without Merlin having to lift a finger, he actually forsook magic to make it happen... except, payback's a bitch and the boy lived. I don't know, Merlin, did it ever occur to you that you could maybe, I don't know, restore magic to Camelot, appease the Goddess who swore she'd kill Arthur if he didn't embrace the old religion, and then just kill Mordred yourself so he won't kill Arthur? Just fucking murder him in his sleep, or poison him, or something. God. People aren't just going to die because you will them to. If you're not gonna kill the boy, then at least give him a chance to prove you wrong. Like, dude, you knew who would Arthur, you knew when, and you knew where. What more did you need? If you couldn't kill Morgana, you had easy access to Mordred. You had one job, Merlin.

They do say hindsight's 50/50.

[bitsandbobsofwriting]

The former God of Magic resents The Mother for sticking him on Earth, and plans on causing as much havoc as he can to punish Her;

Version 2, Dark!Merlin

INTRO

(Version 1, Good!Merlin)

TW: A lot of emotional manipulation, a little violence, a lot of angst.

~

“You’re late.”

The woman’s well practiced blank mask falls into a scowl as she stares at Merlin with mistrust:

“Well, perhaps I was putting off coming to see you, no matter how necessary it is.”

The gang can see the bob of Merlin’s head as he lets out a low chuckle, and they have to stop themselves from recoiling; they’d never heard a noise like that from their young friend before, it sounded almost... cruel.

He lifts a hand to cover his heart as he says in faux offense:

“You wound me, sister. You didn’t want to see your favourite sibling?”

Everyone frowns in confusion, Merlin doesn’t have... siblings. That’s not even mentioning the fact that this woman barely seems human.

The woman doesn’t hide her slight disgust, taking a step back from Merlin and letting out a harsh breath:

“I came here to tell you that you need to hurry up. Time is running out.”

Merlin chuckles again, turning to the side and taking a few short paces, his hands held leisurely behind his back. The amusement on his face is disturbing, and Arthur gulps, not noticing the way Mordred is growing paler and paler by the second. Merlin doesn’t turn to look at the woman as he speaks, and his smirk stretches wider:

“But I’m having so much fun, Ava!”

The woman, Ava, huffs again, rolling her eyes and crossing her arms over her chest. If the gang weren’t so semi-sure that Merlin wasn’t dangerous, they’d think she looked scared:

“Mother sent you here to complete a task. Get it done, and you can come home. Isn’t that what you want? To come home?”

Merlin’s smirk falls, and the snarl that the gang briefly see on his face before he whips around to face Ava takes their breath away. They barely notice the thunder, snapping in the distance in time with Merlin’s anger:

“Mother’s the one keeping me here in the first place. She could accept me back any time.”

Ava takes another step back, and Merlin tilts his head ever so slightly at the movement, but waits for her to speak:

“As punishment for your cruelty. She isn’t happy, you’re making a mess of things.”

Merlin chuckles again, tilting his head even further, and his words have an immediate chilling effect on the group hiding in the bushes:

“Well, if she insists on sending the God of Chaos to fix a problem, perhaps she should expect a little mess. Plus, I’m having more fun here than I’ve had in centuries. These humans... so gullible.-”

Ava shakes her head mournfully, but before she can say anything, Merlin continues, now pacing calmly around the clearing, waving his hands and grinning in his excitement:

“-I mean, they’re just so... easy. To play with, to manipulate. You know they all trust me? They all come running to naïve, innocent, loving little Merlin, spilling all their secrets as they go. Did you know, the drunkard is the son of a noble? “Fuck nobility” my arse, he is nobility.-”

Gwaine clenches his jaw and looks to the floor, ignoring the stares of Arthur and Leon, but before anything can be muttered, Merlin continues, listing their greatest secrets off on his fingers:

“-The gentle giant is terrified that someone’s going to find out that his preferences lie with men, which is ridiculous considering the way he stares at the aforementioned drunkard when he thinks no one but little old me is watching. The blacksmith, even years on, is terrified that his whore sister will never forgive him for... something or other, I wasn’t really paying attention. Camelot’s first, The King’s most trusted, has a debilitating fear of heights, and oh if it isn’t just hilarious to watch when he has to patrol the city walls. And then, there’s the-”

Ava rolls her mournful eyes and interrupts him:

“Your point, Em?”

Merlin laughs, fully and from the belly, but the sound doesn’t bring the gang joy like it normally does:

“My point, is that I’ve got these idiots wrapped around my finger. Mortals: the universe’s most fun toy. I haven’t even gotten to half of them yet. There’s the noble one, who thinks he holds my trust, the Druid boy, whose only redeeming feature is that he’s destined to kill the King Prat one day; believe me, if it weren’t for that I’d have killed the annoying little twerp years ago. Then there’s the King Prat’s magical sister, who is full of such terror. I play with her dreams some nights, force visions of pyres and hatred and destruction to play over and over in her mind. It’s rather amusing, watching her thrash and sweat and whimper in her sleep.-”

Arthur’s head had whipped around to Morgana when Merlin had mentioned her, but the tears streaming down her face and the way her hand was clamped tightly over her mouth stripped his anger from him. Which left him with no distraction, no way to ignore the simple fact of what was happening right now. Merlin was... not what they thought. He was powerful, he was using them. He was playing with them like puppets and pulling their strings this way and that, watching as they could do nothing but follow. Arthur didn’t know what to think, and he definitely didn’t notice the tears on his own cheeks.

Mordred was pale to the point of looking like he was about to faint and Lancelot had a deep frown on his face, tears in his eyes but not quite falling, not yet. This was... a misunderstanding. He... he knows Merlin, this is a trick, or a trap, he’ll explain later and everything will be just fine. He just has to... to trust him. Everything will be fine.

Gwaine keeps his gaze on the floor. A small part of him was feeling a little prideful that Percival liked him back, but the rest of him... had no room for anything but grief. He had suspected that Merlin had magic, but this was something else, this was... a whole new person. Did he ever really know Merlin? Did any of them? 

Elyan and Gwen sat pressed together tightly, though Gwen had one hand on Morgana’s shaking back, and her other was reaching around Elyan, gripping Leon’s shoulder tightly. Leon was just staring blankly at the scene in front of him, though anyone that knew him well enough would be able to see the tight clench of his jaw and the anger (and grief) in his eyes.

Ava interrupted Merlin’s gleeful ranting, the tears in her eyes a little more prominent as she took on a slightly more desperate tone:

“Please, Em, just... stop. They’re important, they have destinies, you can not destroy them or push them too far; this is cruel, even for you. This... you never used to be like this.”

Merlin turns around, facing away from his sister and giving the hidden group full view of his rage-filled face. His voice is quiet and clipped and angry as he asks:

“Oh?”

Another roll of thunder echoes through the clearing, closer this time, and fat droplets of rain fall harshly from the sky, mixing with the tears on everyone’s face. Ava sighs, tears overflowing as she gulps before answering, her voice shaking slightly as she takes a step towards Merlin:

“You’re meant to be the God of Magic, not Chaos. You were so... beautiful, balanced. You saw wonder in everything, every little spark of magic and every single prayer put a smile on your face. You loved humanity even more than Mother did. Now look at you, you’re tormenting them, torturing them. This isn’t you, Em, please. Help them, and things can go back to the way they were, help them and you can come home.”

The anger on Merlin’s face had only grown as she spoke, and each individual hidden in the bushes had to make a concerted effort to stop themselves from bolting. None of them had felt terror like it, and the fact that it was Merlin they were all so scared of... well, it didn’t help.

Lightening streaks across the sky and wind howls violently through the forest, calming only when Merlin shuts his eyes and takes a deep breath, straightening his back and smirking slightly before he replies, still not turning around to face his sister:

“You’re right. I loved humanity, I was desperate to see them succeed. And then they butchered me. I gave them this universe to frolic in, and in return they call me a monster, a beast, they call me evil, they make nightmares out of me. I still listen to every little prayer, and do you know what I hear? I hear my people, my wonderful little creations, my creatures of magic, begging for mercy, begging for the pain to stop. The humanity I so used to love turned on them, began to burn them, out of spite and fear and hatred. I will not show them any more grace than they have showed me, I will give them exactly what they deserve, and that blonde idiot is at the top of my list of people who have to fucking pay. I won’t destroy him entirely, because ultimately I want my creatures to stop suffering, but I will break him. I will rip him apart piece by piece for what he has done to me.-”

The absolute fury in Merlin’s words, the hatred, translates to thunder in the sky and agony in Arthur’s chest. The King can barely breathe, muffling the sobs tearing from his mouth with both hands, both terrified of being discovered, and desperate to... to let Merlin punish him for the pain he has caused.

Leon settles a shaking hand on his shoulder, but Arthur doesn’t look his way, his blurry gaze focused on Merlin, now finally turning back to his sister:

“-You know, I’m this close to getting that big blonde idiot to fall in love with me. How pathetic is that?? All it took was a few touches here, a few lingering stares there, saving his life occasionally. The man is so pathetically starved for attention I imagine he’d fall for anyone who showed him the barest amount of affection. That is how I will break him.-”

The only thing stopping Arthur from sobbing aloud is Leon collapsing behind him, pulling the young King back into his chest and wrapping a tight arm around his torso, one hand clamped over his mouth as he mutters desperate reassurances into his ear. Morgana pulls Gwen close in a similar way when the servant’s cries grow harsher, her brother burying his face in her shoulder.

Lancelot barely notices Gwaine gripping his arm hard enough to leave bruises for weeks, or Percival pushing his forehead into Lance’s shoulder blade. All he can do is sit and stare at the ground, his breathing slow but shaky, tears streaming silently down his face as he rethinks everything he’s ever known.

Mordred sits on his own, rocking back and forth rhythmically as he tightens the clutch he has around his knees. Tears drip from his young cheeks, poisoning the ground beneath him as he struggles to consider his faith. His faith in magic, in Emrys, who was meant to be balanced and beautiful and giving. Emrys, who he now knew was twisted and angry and desperate for revenge.

All of their hearts are splitting, cracking down the middle.

“-It won’t be physical pain, no, that’ll be down to the Druid boy. He doesn’t want to kill Arthur now, but he will, one day, when I give him one final push. He’ll fall so far into the darkness there’ll be nothing of him left to save, and when he plunges his sword into The Pendragon’s chest, I’ll sit back and watch with a smile on my face, and Arthur will realise that the man he loves, the man who claimed to love him in return, hated him all along. Tricked him. I will watch the life drain from his eyes, and he will spend his last few moments on this world in every kind of agony imaginable, lost in the knowledge that I wanted him to suffer, that he is being punished for his sins.”

Ava shakes her head, silver tears dripping from her emerald eyes as she stares at the floor:

“Are Sir Mordred and the Lady Morgana not your creatures? Do you not wish to save at least them?”

Merlin chuckles darkly:

“I had faith in them once, but they made their decisions. They sided with a Pendragon over me. Mother may be fond of her precious Once and Future King, but to be fair, she’s fond of anything with a pulse, and I, for one, can not wait until she’s not quite so fond of him anymore.”

Ava gulps, taking a desperate step towards her amused brother, but before she can say anything, before she can make one last plea for mercy on humanity’s behalf, Merlin tilts his head, smirking dangerously:

“Do you think they’re scared?”

She halts in her tracks, blinking in confusion, and Merlin’s smile grows into a chuckle as he gestures behind him:

“The King and all his little friends, hidden in the bushes. Do you think they’re scared?” 

The gang barely have time to look up in shock before their bodies are moving, out of their control. They stand rigidly and walk single-file out from their hiding place, coming to stand in a line at the side of the clearing. Merlin hasn’t even looked at them, but his hand floats in the air, a sickly looking yellow mist swirling around his fingers as he tilts his head at his sister, staring in horror at The King, the knights, the Lady, and the servant.

Merlin drops his hand and they all fall to their knees, not even bothering to be brave as they sob. The angry God finally turns, and the serene smile on his face is chilling as he walks towards them, coming to stand in front of Lance and Mordred first. The two of them are the calmest, though calm in the way that they don’t really look... present. They stare blankly ahead, breathing shallow and tears still falling as Merlin crouches in front of them, gripping a chin in each hand and shaking their heads roughly. His voice comes out a whisper, the frown on his face looking more disappointed than anything:

“So much faith, so much trust. It’s a little pitiful, if I’m being honest.”

They don’t react to his words and he smirks before letting them go and standing, moving on to Elyan and Gwen, gripping the knight’s shoulder and saying with mocking sympathy in his voice:

“You were right, by the way,-”

He glances at a fully sobbing Gwen with disgust:

“-she’ll never forgive you, but she’ll never tell you that. You’ll just spend the rest of your life wondering why your relationship was never the same.”

Next, he shuffles over to Gwaine, not even bothering to see the siblings’ reactions as he passes Leon and Percival with a look of disinterest on his face. He leans down in front of the knight, running a soft hand through his hair, waiting for the man to relax slightly before gripping his hair harshly and yanking back, so he has to look up at him. Merlin gives him a blindingly cruel smile:

“You're grateful that Percival is just as in love with you as you are with him, but don’t think yourself too lucky. You’re a hypocrite and a drunk, and my dear old Percy has too much self respect to put himself through that. I’d go for a good tumble in the hay and give up while you’re ahead.”

Once again, he moves back, his sister having to look away in her grief, her empathy drowning her. The God comes to stand in front of Morgana, who is desperately trying to look brave but failing miserably:

“And you. You’re meant to be The Darkness, but I couldn’t very well have you outdo me, could I? Try your hardest, I’ll still be the end of you, and I wait with baited breath for the day you fall, and the day soon after that, when I get to kill you.”

She break down in tears again at that, horrified with the idea that she might one day be on the same end of morality and cruelty as this monster in front of her.

Merlin smirks before rolling his eyes and finally coming to stand in front of Arthur. The King calms his breathing just enough to look up at a smirking Merlin, his voice cracking and barely-there as he mutters:

“Please... Merlin, please...”

The smirk drops from Merlin’s face as he brings his hand up, the sickly yellow mist back again. Arthur rises from the floor, hands clutching at his throat as the air is drawn from his lungs. Merlin steps closer to his with a snarl, his free hand gripping Arthur’s chin like a vice, though his voice eerily calm as he murmurs:

“You. You and Uther were so desperate for a scape-goat, for a villain, for a monster. And you picked magic, you picked me. So stop being so fucking pathetic, I’m just playing the part you gave me to perfection. You picked the premise, I’m writing the ending.”

Ava finally speaks up, her voice loud, despite the waver:

“Brother please, this is... this is beyond cruelty, please just stop.”

Arthur is dropped, and The King can barely find it in himself to choke for air as Merlin turns back to his sister, the amused smirk back on his face:

“Why? None of them are going to remember in the morning anyway. I’ve had my fun, this has been cathartic, but I can’t have them ruining my plans. So run along now sister, tell Mother that her precious task is being completed, I’m just taking the scenic route.” 

She shakes her head in defeat, staring at the floor. She lifts her head, opening her mouth to make one last attempt, but she closes it, realising that there’s nothing she could possibly say to persuade him to suddenly have mercy, mercy that no one had ever shown him. She gulps, letting out a deep breath before shaking her head again and turning around, walking back into the trees, the way she came.

The God looks back to his puppets, shivering in time with their knotted strings, smirking once more before he clicks his fingers and everything goes dark.

~

Arthur wakes the next morning feeling oddly refreshed and surprisingly unannoyed at his idiot manservant’s lateness. He rolls his eyes at the bright sunshine glaring through his curtains, the sun certainly a lot higher in the sky than it should be at the time The King wakes, but oh well. Merlin has been chipper lately, and the warmth that Arthur feels in his chest at the younger man’s happiness makes him more likely to forgive him his tardiness.

As if thinking of him had summoned him (wishful thinking on Arthur’s part), Merlin bursts through the doors, not bothering to knock as per usual, a breakfast-laden tray in his arms and a cheeky grin on his face. Arthur rolls his eyes again, chucking a pillow at Merlin half-heartedly as he grumbles, also half-heartedly:

“You’re late.”

Merlin chuckles, setting the tray down on the table before jogging endearingly over to Arthur’s bedside, grabbing his hand and pulling him to stand upright:

“Something tells me you don’t mind all that much, Your Pratness.”

Arthur huffs, but only to stop himself from smiling, and resolutely ignores the way Merlin’s hand is still in his. The servant squeezes his palm softly, and Arthur gulps, pulling away and walking towards his meal, hoping the food would squash the butterflies in his stomach.

He rubs the sleep from his eyes, smiling to himself softly at a whole range of things: the good night’s rest he’d had, the bright sunshine, Merlin’s good mood, the sensation of Merlin’s hand in his own, Merlin’s dazzling smile, Merlin, Merlin, Merlin...

Merlin stares at his back as he goes, noting with a dangerously satisfied smirk the red blush of his ears.

The scenic route indeed.

~

THE END!!

Oops I made myself sad. Sorry to say but I hope this makes you sad too.

This was SUPER fun to write and I’m so glad I decided to do two versions😅

Link to the Good!Merlin version (much MUCH fluffier, I promise) at the top!!

[tiodolma]

you raise good points.

so i'll also raise some other points.

Quickening is still a term used historically to refer to the stage of pregnancy where the fetus starts to kick (aristotle, middle english) I cannot stress this enough. .

the dialogue of the protagonists from the episode s2x11 (i apologize for assuming earlier that it was from s1x12) was structured as if sleazy Alvarr seduced an innocent reckless maiden, Morgana to join him in the cause or give whatever he wanted coz he was charismatic and talks well.

s2x11 GAIUS Alvarr has a fearsome reputation. MERLIN You know of him? GAIUS I know he's a sorcerer, and that he and his band of renegades have threatened to overthrow the King. MERLIN He sounded pretty determined. GAIUS He's a fanatic, and his supporters follow him unthinkingly, blinded by his charisma MERLIN Well, it worked on Morgana.

note that in s1x12... merlin didn't respond as bitterly as above when he reported to kilgharrah when Morgana was working with Tauren

s1x12

MERLIN The sorcerer Tauren is plotting to kill the King. He's made an ally of Morgana. I don't know what to do! KILGHARRAH Do...nothing.

The dfference in Merlin's tone was striking. In s1x12, Merlin was still concerned for her making allies out of rebels. But now in s2x11, It was as if Merlin was disappointed for Morgana for getting duped into oldest and stupidest tale known to man: a young maiden falls for the bad boy and gets influenced impregnated by him.

3. CONCERNING WITCH AS A TERM ASSOCIATED WITH TREASON / harming the throne or the kingdom / evil

The protagonist, MERLIN, used to refute Kilgharrah in s2x03 for calling Morgana a "Witch"

MERLIN I need their help. (sigh) Someone I care about needs their help. KILGHARRAH You speak of the witch, the Lady Morgana. MERLIN She's not a witch. She's my friend. KILGHARRAH She cannot be trusted. MERLIN What makes you say that? KILGHARRAH It would be better if The Witch... MERLIN Stop calling her that! KILGHARRAH It would be better if The Witch never knew the true extent of her powers. MERLIN You're wrong. I know her. She has a good heart.

but in s2x11 Merlin doesn't refute Kilgharrah anymore.

MERLIN The Crystal has been stolen. KILGHARRAH By who?

MERLIN The Lady Morgana. KILGHARRAH (laughs) That witch does not have the power to wield the Crystal. MERLIN Does the druid boy? KILGHARRAH Mordred? It is possible. Why do you ask?

This could mean that "Witch" has always had a negative and possibly treasonous connotation in Merlin's mind. Before s2x11, "witch" was a kind of slur for Merlin (having faced numerous antagonist witches before) ...but in s2x11 Merlin does not disagree with Kilgharrah anymore, since Morgana was moving against Uther/Camelot together with other fellow magical rebels

4.) I do agree that s2x11 was OFFICIALLY the first time Morgana made a move in behalf of her magic kind, however it was not the first time she committed treason against Uther.

s1x12

MORGANA Then the kingdom is doomed! For one by one you make enemies of us all! UTHER You speak treason, Morgana. MORGANA Only a mad man hears the truth as treason. UTHER Take care, child, or I'll have you restrained. MORGANA You just try

......

MORGANA Gold? A good man died in your quest for riches, Tauren. His daughter is now an orphan. TAUREN I'm sorry for that. Truly. But we did not want the gold to line our pockets. The gold was but a means, a means to rid this kingdom of Uther Pendragon once and for all. MORGANA What are you saying? TAUREN Bribery is rife at Camelot. I will use the corruption at the heart of his kingdom, and such abundance of gold will buy me into the King's chambers, even to the King himself. MORGANA The guards may be fools, Tauren, but the King is not. TAUREN Do you have a better plan? MORGANA To get to Uther, you need someone close to him. TAUREN And you know of such a person? MORGANA I do. Me.

5.) another thing is that she did not even manifest her magic powers in episode s2x`11!!! Rather, she used her personal and political influence over her fellow royals to trick/manipulate them. There was nothing witchy about her actions. It was all just court intrigue and pyschological banter on her part, while Alvarr and Mordred did all the magic lifting.

This is why I am apprehensive about the witch in the episode title and how the term was only spoken by the characters that worked against her.

...................

"The Witch's Quickening" is a phrase or title that can only diegetically originate from the suspicious minds of Merlin, Gaius and Kilgharrah. They were the ones who called her a witch in the first place. Morgana has never referred to herself as such and neither did Alvarr nor Mordred. Being of magic was a gift to them, not a slur.

Kilgharrah, Gaius and especially, Merlin, were the ones who thought she was charmed, fooled and seduced by Alvarr. They were the ones who assumed that Alvarr had given her or impregnated the "evil" motivation (which is committing treason against Uther/Camelot) and the first one who empowered her to do all of it for the sake of magic-kin.

...................

I still think that "quickening" here is a metaphor for:

impregnation - Morgana was influenced by Alvarr and Mordred with ideas, thus empowering her, and making her "conceive" the powerful "evil" rebel "Witch" that she was about to become;

significant fetus development - Morgana's true antagonist magical-unbornbaby self making its presence known by kicking and fighting from and as the political womb (or heart) of camelot.

(NOTE: some fans also believe Morgana to be the original heart of Camelot).

Why was that episode called "the witch's quickening" tho? Bbc Morgana never slept with anyone? Or was that a metaphor for "evil" to start rooting in her (womb)? What's with the weirdly sexual connotations?

Funny tho the evil we are talking about is her retaliation to uther for unjustly sentencing her friend's father to die.

Whatever the producers and writers of this show smoking should be banned lol.

[the-kingshound]

Hello! I hope you’re doing well today!

I’m hoping it’s still ok to submit an OC (if not, just ignore this XD), but if not that’s okay!

One of my more beloved OC’s is named Charles, but prefers to go by Charlie (or Lee, whichever is more convenient for people). Charlie goes by He/him pronouns and is essentially a personified golden retriever. (Or if someone wants another, more specific comparison, imagine Tadashi from BG who gives Baymax-level hugs)

He’s got the short golden hair, icy blue eyes, loves people, is incredibly affectionate (gives tons of compliments and his love language is physical touch. But obviously he’ll respect boundaries because the last thing he wants is to make people uncomfortable), and is one of the most loyal people ever.

Speaking of love language, Charlie’s (at least in this universe) likely comes from the lack of physical love he got from his parents, thus warranting him the need to give it to others (Arthur and Gwyar better watch themselves, they’re in for lots of love from this boy). He wants people, through his actions and words that they matter, both to him, and to everyone else, and this includes Mordred. Charlie knows what it’s like to be seen as other, as something his parents were never proud of, so he gladly takes young Mordred under his wing and cares for him as much as Mordred will allow. Charlie’s also a 6’3’’ mountain of muscle, so everyone must beware of sudden (yet loving) hugs from behind and being picked up randomly when Charlie senses the conversation’s going badly (this includes Yniol btw. They may be tall, but Charlie’s got the strength and heart to lift pretty much anyone).

But as affectionate and caring as Charlie can be, he can also be pretty scary when he’s angry. While he would never hurt an innocent person, should anyone dare hurt his loved ones, whether with words or through action, the only thing holding Charlie back from striking them down would be the explicit permission of the person who was hurt. Even then, Charlie will not care what happens to himself or the offender as long as they either apologize or get shat they deserve.

[imagine-nation20]

Just Like This

Summary: Capture the flag isn’t always your least favorite camp activity, but sometimes it is.

Requested by: Anon

Request:Hey if your still doing Percy Jackson fics/headcannons can I request Connor stoll x shy daughter of Hecate reader pls

A/N: I started writing this as headcanons, and then I got really carried away and decided to write this, oops. I’m just glad someone requested Connor. Even if I forgot about this request and stumbled upon it very late. Also, not so sure this turned out as a shy reader, since I am bad at writing shy characters.

~~~

Hecate’s cabin was the exact opposite of what you had expected when you first arrived at the camp. Instead of the dark, dreary color palette you had imagined based on the other camper’s cabins, it was surprisingly bright. White walls, with a mix of pale and dark purples. There were various decorations around, only one bed, and different magic bits and bobbles. One wall was taken up entirely by a bookshelf. Most of the books looked far from normal though, and you had only been brave enough to open the most plain looking ones as of yet.

It felt safe. It felt like home.

Still, you couldn't remain inside all day. Someone would notice, come looking for you, maybe make you do their chores. A knock at the door confirmed this thought, and you stood from your bed, moving over to the door.

It swung open to reveal the youngest Stoll brother, Connor, who looked to be in his usual state of disarray. Dark hair looking unbrushed, his camp shirt wrinkled, jeans rolled up to his calves, and his sneakers properly drenched and getting water all over the front steps of the cabin.

You raised a brow, “Do I want to know?”

Connor looked down to his shoes, “Probably not,” he admitted, looking up at you with a toothy grin.

You leaned against the doorway of the cabin, smiling down at Connor who was much shorter than you from his placement down the steps. “And I guess knocking on my door was more important than changing out of your drenched sneakers for some reason?”

“Annabeth ordered me to remind you not to miss capture the flag again,” He shrugged.

You narrowed your eyes, “Ordered? Aren’t you supposed to be some hotshot counselor? When did you start taking orders?”

Connor leaned on one of the pillars, exaggerating a ‘smooth’ aura. “Since those orders allowed me to visit my favorite demigod.”

“Me?” You asked, faking sweetness.

A meow came from behind you, and Connor’s facade shifted into a smile, “No, Mordred.”

Your cat ran out to him from between your legs, jumping right into his arms. You glared at the cat, crossing your arms. “Traitor.”

“We should be going, if we don’t want Annabeth to cut us into little pieces for being late.”

“Do you think we could take her?”

“Ha, no.”

Capture the flag wasn’t entirely horrid. Especially since Hecate and Hermes cabins were both sided with Athena that time. That means that all Connor and you had to do was lounge around where the flag was, and make sure no stray Ares kids got a little too big for their britches. So far, they had no trouble.

“Oh, oh, I spy with my little eye, something green.”

“Connor, I swear to god, if its a leaf again-”

“This is so boring,” Connor groaned, cutting you off. “Maybe one of these days, the Athena kids should get the boring job. Let Anabeth sit as a rock for an hour with nothing to do.”

The small clearing was quiet. You and Connor shared a look. There was nothing innocent in the mischievous glint of his eyes. You began to shake your head, silently telling your friend a blanket no for whatever he was thinking.

“Connor, do-” An arrow whizzed through the trees, catching you in the shoulder. You shouted out in both surprise and the sudden pain that came from the tip embedding itself into your skin. It had cut through the leather armor like butter.

“(Y/N)!” Connor shouted.

The sound of a heavy scuffle met your ears, your eyes staring up at the canopy of trees above. Footsteps, echoing beneath you through the packed dirt. Your eyes drifted over to your shoulder, seeing the arrow shaft sticking up from your shoulder. With a bit to your lip, and a deep breath, you reached over to feel the back side.

The tip of the arrow was poking out from the leather armor. Knowing that pulling it back would just cause more damage, you reached to the shaft, snapping the wooden stick off. This would give more access to movement, and you wouldn’t have to worry about knocking into it and causing more pain.

Slowly, you stood. The sword on your belt was easily drawn with a ‘shink’, drawing the attention of the Ares boy making his way towards the flag. Connor was busy with another, their sword clashing. The Ares kid smirked at you, charging with a hearty yell.

You ducked the blow, kicking out at his shin. The boy toppled forward, groaning. You hit the back of his head with the pommel of the sword, halting his movements. He would have a terrible headache when he woke up, but at least you hadn’t the stomach to repay him for the arrow wound.

“Hey, you good?” Connor’s hand was on your good shoulder, he eyes peering closely into your own. You must have been staring at the knocked out camper for too long.

“Yeah,” you lied, feeling the pain ripple through your shoulder. “I think I should go see Chiron.”

Connor nodded, reaching down to his belt for the emergency horn there. After a few events of campers in danger with no way to call, Chiron had proposed special war horns for the counselors to call for help.

“I think something is wrong,” You mumbled, looking down at the wound. It was festering a dark purple. “That’s not good.”

The horn blew, and you blacked out.

~~~

When you came too again, you were in the Apollo tent. A few other campers were held up in cots, but it was mostly empty. Outside, cricket could be heard. You must’ve been asleep for a good few hours. Your stomach rumbled at the thought of missing dinner.

Every little movement hurt, even tilting your head to look around the tent. Something cloth rustled on your head, and you went to lift your right hand. However, you found yourself unable, as your hand was pinned to the bed by a much larger, warmer hand.

Connor’s head rested on the cot beside you, his dark, curly hair spilling across the linen sheets. Soft breathes escaped his mouth, which hung open. Soft cheeks dampened by puffiness and dark purple circles beneath the lids of his eyes.

“He’s been there the whole time,” A quiet voice whispered. “Will couldn’t get him to leave.”

You looked over, spotting an injured and annoyed looking Nyssa. She looked like she had been hit by a train, and knowing the Hephaestus cabin, she probably had.

“Did he miss dinner?” You whispered back.

Nyssa gave you a weird look, “Yeah, three of them. Will had to shove a plate into his hands and force feed him.”

Your eyes widened, “Wait, three?”

“Yeah, you’ve been out for two whole days,” Nyssa looked out the flap longingly, “At least you didn’t have to be awake for it though. Harley set off an explosion in the workshop, threw me into a wall. Everyone was still scrambling around you when I got here.”

A shift beside you, and you looked down. Connors dark lashes were fluttering, his eyes slowly peeling open. The bright blue looked dulled, like it had lost its shine. They trailed up your arm, seeing you sat up slightly, eyes peering back.

He let out a shaky breath, “(Y/N),” sitting bolt straight, he gripped your hand. “Are you okay?”

“What happened, Con?”

He looked almost annoyed, though not at you, “That stupid Ares kid accidentally loaded his quiver with poisoned arrows. Don’t worry though, I accidentally laced his food with laxatives, and his bed with roaches.”

You couldn’t help the smile that stretched out over your face, “And here I would have thought you wouldn’t have had time, being here twenty-four-seven and all,” you gave him a look.

“Yeah yeah,” he rubbed the back of his neck with his free hand. “Listen-”

“Oh for gods’ sake, just kiss and get it over with. If I have to sit through one more awkward conversation where you two dance around each other I’ll poison you both,” Nyssa growled out, looking only mildly annoyed in reality.

You shared a look with Connor, both of you holding back smiles, “Should I tell her?”

“What? That we’ve been dating for the last two years?”

You both turned to look at her simultaneously. Nyssa looked almost horrified at the realization. Her mouth hung open, the hello kitty Band-Aid on her cheek scrunched as her face did.

“Oh Zeus’ beard, you two are just like this? May the god’s have mercy…” She muttered under her breath, laying down in bed. She moved her pillow over her head to block you out.

You and Connor shared a laugh, and with both of you stuck inside the tent after curfew, you saw no problem in letting him climb into the cot with you. It was a more comfortable and peaceful sleep for you both.

[xviruserrorx]

5, 15, 25

5. Most popular fic this year

Technically I have to say RBTR as I did update it this year once but I'm not gonna consider it because it has been on hiatus almost the whole year... So instead I'm gonna say it's a three-way tie between Frogs and Knights, Ingenuous & You Were Right I was Wrong. Simply because those three have a constant traction of kudos coming in etc.

15. Something you learned this year

At the end of the day places like here, Tumblr, Ao3 and many others are just fandom spaces. And people have their own opinions on certain things. Even if certain people are popular fans in the community does not mean you have to like their work, fanfiction, headcannons, every single thing they post, no. You be your own person and write what you want to write and create what you want to create.

25. A fic you read this year that you would recommend everyone to read

Okay I'm gonna mention a few because I can't pick one. Also please read the tags on all of these!

A Minor Situation by @thecourtsorcerer

Merlin is court sorcerer and an incident happens with Mordred making him a small boy again. It's not finished but this fic is so delightful and I just love the idea of Mordred being tiny again and magic being accepted. And Gwyn's writing is amazing as always, how they do it is a mystery but *mwah* highly recommend this fic.

Would it be cheating Zoing if I put you on here?... Oh well.

I've Tried To Understand by @zoingeroni

The way the letter are written literally just tear me apart. This takes place sometime after Mordred leaves Camelot and certain people are sending him letters. It's absolutely heartbreaking because it feels so personal in a way that you, the reader are receiving these letters like your in Mordred's shoes and Ahhhhh... A must-read. The certain details in the first chapter are adorable, the second and third chapters are a bouquet made of heartaches, and the ending to the third chapter is...wow. Just go read it!

Set Ablaze by @meteorjam

I remember thinking Mordred and Daegal would be a cute ship back in like 2015 sometime after the show had ended, but I couldn't look any fandom space in the face back then still so I just reclused myself again. When I got courage earlier this year and searched for Daegal's character in the Ao3 tags I was so surprised to find fanfiction and this was the first (and only one I believe) I read. And 2015 me would have been bouncing off the walls. This fic single-handedly pulled all those suppressed memories (and hidden notebooks) out from all those years ago and made it feel like new again. The way Naomi writes it is just so fricken cute and the ending is hilarious, cute, and awkward all at the same time and gives it this very teenager feeling to a relationship and I just love it.

Sir Mordred and the Homoerotic fanfiction by Noot_is_not_creative

I was skeptical going in to this fic because I don't ship Mordred with anyone aside from like Kara, Daegal etc people I headcanon as around his age. But this fic had me laughing and feeling so much second-hand embarrassment for Mordred. But in this fic Mordred has a innocent crush on Merlin and teenage hormones aren't friendly so he copes by writing fanfiction about him and Merlin (Merthur is end game I believe for the fic and the Merdred is just one side with Mordred's innocent crushing on Merlin)... Sadly this fic is not finished but my gosh what two chapters their is, is just amazing and worth it.

There is another fic I wanted to list but I can't find it but essentially it's right after 5x11 and Morgana is comforting Mordred about Kara's death. Very cute and sweet fic that really captures both of their characters splendidly.

Thank you for the ask Zoing 💜

End of the year Fanfic ask game

[kob131]

So, inspired by Shuttershocky’s own character opinions, I think I’ll start doing my own.

And no, I’m not doing Mordred first. She comes later.

Nah, considering a certain Ruler’s recent reveal, I think I’ll talk about a certain Shirou-face.

So quick overview of Angra Mainju-

He’s not actually the Zoroastrian god of Evil. No, he’s actually more like Sasaki Kojiro- The guy who the myth of Angra Mainju is BASED off of. He was just some ordinary villager who drew the shortest of straws and was used as a scapegoat for the sins of his villagers, tortured for decades until he died of old age. Because of this, he has a pretty nasty hatred of humanity. Which you would think would disqualify him from being a Heroic Spirit (I mean, logically who would consider him a hero?) but it’s said that his torture put the villagers at ease, meaning he did technically do a heroic deed and thus was preserved by the Throne of Heroes.

In the Third Holy Grail War, the Einsberns tried to summon the evil god but, for a multitude of reasons that include it not existing in the first place, they got him instead. Problem? The guy isn’t a normal hero, he’s a village boy who got tortured. He doesn’t have any special powers or even a proper Noble Phantasm. So of course, he gets his ass kicked. But thing is, he was so weak the Grail thought he was a human and thus tried to grant his wish.

Which was to actually BECOME All The World’s Evil.

And so the Grail tried to do it...but things got fucky. So the next two wars are basically just attempts at bring his wish to life. He...kind of exists here? Issue is that in Fate/Zero and Fate/Stay Night, Angra Mainju is more a force of nature or a being of pure evil rather than the tortured village boy he actually is. So for simplicity’s sake AND due to how radically different ‘All The World’s Evil’ is- I’ll just skip over his supposed presence in those two and move on.

Despite his wished for form’s destruction in Fate/Stay Night, Angra Mainju survived. In fact, his time as “All The World’s Evil” turned him into a proper Heroic Spirit, giving him an actual Noble Phantasm and actual status as a Heroic Spirit. Here, he gains a sort of obsession with granting wishes. So he goes around looking for someone’s wish to grant. During this time, he finds Bazett Frega McRemitz (AKA The ACTUAL Master of Cu Chulanin before Kirei decided to do what he does best: Fuck people over) dying, wishing not to die. And thus, Angra Mainju does his best to keep her alive. For 6 months, this meant keeping her alive but in a vegetative state. 

After being discovered by Caren Hortensia (Kirei’s daughter. ... This is kind of important later), this meant keeping her alive AND sustaining her consciousness. To do this, he creates Fate/Hollow Ataraxia’s four day loop (the same length of time he survived his war.) Through this, he tricks Bazett into thinking that she’s participating in the Fifth Holy Grail War. Issue being, Angra knows little more than jackshit about said war so what ends up happening is that he uses the Third Grail War structure with Fifth Grail War players as stand-ins. He is also only active with Bazett at night, the catch being that the person that the player thinks they’re controlling (Shirou) is actually an unaware Angra, living out his own wish of a normal life.

At first, Angra is just being selfish and indulging himself during this time. However, over time, his interactions with the people in Shirou’s life, Shirou’s own influence over him (as having lost his identity, he effectively needs to adopt another’s to exist) and, most importantly, his new found relationship with Bazett and Caren causes him to try and end the four day loop. This going against his Master’s wishes, as she fears that she will die due to finding out about the loop and losing Avenger, who is assumed to become nothing once again. However, he manages to convince her by revealing he really did save her life and that she had to move on. So at the end, he and Bazett race to opposite ends of the Grail, Bazett back to life and Angra Mainju embracing oblivion once again.

So...yeah. Pretty heavy stuff even with me skipping some stuff.

We only really learn about Angra Mainju in Fate/Hollow Ataraxia, since that’s where we truly meet him as a person. And at the beginning...he’s not a good person. Avengers in general are known for being highly destructive, malicious and dangerous Servants because their Class effectively puts them on edge at all times, constant consumed by hate. As the first Avenger, Angra both embodies this and subverts it at the same time.

Yes he is consumed by hate. ... But said hate is not an emotional state like other Avengers. His hate is his nature by the point we meet him. Meaning he isn’t on edge like his fellows, he isn’t clouded by extreme emotion. For all his cynicism and malice, he’s by far the calmest and most rational Avenger we have seen so far. Which makes some of his actions (like killing a family to draw out his enemies) come across as even worse than normal since he isn’t openly insane. Even beyond this, Angra is a sarcastic asshole who loves fucking with people and being insulting.

However, as things go on, as he lives the life of Shirou Emiya and the Servant of Bazett, he gets better. Sure, he’s still rude as all hell. But the guy does show he cares about Bazett and thinks about her well being. He falls in love with Caren, who does love him back (if you’re wondering how: I believe it’s implied Caren suffers from the same condition Kirei did in regards to empathy. So makes sense she’d love an embodiment of hate and vengence) and he did enjoy living as Shirou, revealing that beneath the hate that became his nature- He’s just a normal guy who got SEVERELY fucked over. Hell, when Medusa was on the verge of morphing into Gorgon, Angra walks by and talks to her. He gives her a speech on what it means to be a monster and ends up helping her prevent her transformation, even though having her become a monster would help him make people suffer (and maybe even someone who understands him, as Gorgon is an Avenger herself.)

Just as his lack of emotional distress makes his evil actions worse, it also means he’s capable of change and becoming good. He learns love and care despite having lived a life no one could even comprehend, forced into a Class that is more like a curse than an honor. Despite his hatred of humanity, he still believes in it somewhat. He adopts some of Shirou’s heroic traits through living his life. And at the very end, this jackass who started things off by killing random innocents...ends up making the ultimate sacrifice, one where he gains nothing but loses everything, where he really doesn’t want to do it...all because he came to care for Bazett.

I’ll admit, I sobbed at the end.

Now, Angra isn’t really used in any serious manner after this. He appears in the Accel/Zero and Christmas in the Underworld events...mostly as jokes. However, I would like to note his Bond 10 Craft Essence. These CEs are effectively summations of the characters themselves. For example, Mordred’s Bond 10 effectively sums up her identity issues. And Angra Mainju’s?

It’s all about how he was a necessary evil, his life taken from him, hatred burned into him...

...and how Caren, despite seeing it all, still loved him.

And the CEs effect? A Guts buff and the ability to hurt Beast class enemies in a way no other Servant can replicate.

In essence, that love gives him the ability to keep living (with his strongest skill KILLING him btw) and to more effectively protect the world. And considering how the Beasts are related to humanity, it might just be because that love made him human again.

In short, Angra Mainju is a person forced into a role, his nature overwritten by his torture, cursed by fate because of others, indulging in his role because it’s all he knows-

And yet, even he finds a way to become a better person. All culminating in a sacrifice that can only be described as ‘Heroic’.

He truly is a Heroic Spirit.