#but like... dislike him for reasons that are accurate to the game and his character rather than for bad faith mischaracterisations.

[prismatic-starstuff]

miquella get behind me.

[primofate]

Confessions Series - Part 2: Description [Genshin Impact Male Characters]

In a nutshell: He asks if you have your eyes set on someone. You start describing HIS features and watch for his reaction. (Hint: He likes you too)

Other works in this series: (Part 1 - Overheard)

Warnings: The usual, haven't written in a while, please forgive mistakes, bit of angst in Diluc (couldn't help it), I am a sleep deprived mother, some profanity, for some reason did not feel like writing Zhongli though he's one of my faves.

Characters: Aether, Albedo, Alhaitham, Ayato, Baizhu, Bennett, Chongyun, Cyno, Dainsleif, Diluc, Gaming, Heizou, Itto, Kaeya, Lyney, Neuvillette, Scaramouche, Tartaglia, Wriothesley, Xiao, gn!reader

Personal Favourites: Diluc, Wriothesley

Aether

"Yeah, I do," you start. "He's very selfless...He's always running around helping other people,"

Aether nods, intense gaze in his eyes while listening.

"Hmm...He has...a partner. Like a companion he always travels with..."

Aether's brows start to furrow and his head tilts the slightest bit. Paimon flying next to him has no clue who it is whatsoever.

"He's not originally from Teyvat...He's on a journey, you see..." this is where you start getting nervous

You see it click in Aether's head slowly, and his eyes start to widen the slightest bit

"Hey, that sounds an awful lot like you, traveller! Why have we never met this person before, Y/N?" Paimon asks and you only smile.

"P-Paimon," Aether glances at her and then back to you. It's silent for a moment. Paimon is super confused.

But Aether being Aether didn't want to get the wrong idea and racks up the courage to ask you one last question. "He's on a journey...to look for his twin sister?"

You smile the brightest smile you've ever given him. "Correct!"

"Ah...Well..." Aether starts to feel the heat on his cheeks. "That's..." he doesn't say anything else for a few seconds. "Don't get me wrong, I'm just...I'm happy!"

Is basically flustered when he realizes you've technically just confessed to him.

Albedo

"Simply put, I think he's dedicated to his craft," You shrug and smile

"...An admirable trait," he responds.

"He's frequently in Dragonspine. He spends a bit of time in his lab there," you decide to just go straight for the obvious.

Albedo pauses. "I...see..." Turns to you with a small smile "I wasn't aware that you were that fond of me,"

"Now you know," you simply say and try to play it off with a wave of your hand.

He chuckles under his breath and strides over to you while saying. "Well then, I suppose it's my turn to talk about the person I've set my eyes on,"

Proceeds to describe you accurately, down to your likes and dislikes. In his eyes, you seem like something so precious and you can't help but feel a bit embarrassed.

Alhaitham

"Hmm... Sort of," you explain. "He's a little...hard to reach,"

Alhaitham "...and you still pursue him?"

You laugh a bit "I'm hardly pursuing him, I'm just...observing. I like watching him, even though he has the most unreadable face I've seen,"

Alhaitham goes quiet for a moment. He catches on fast, he already has an idea but is cautious about what he says. "...I see," he doesn't ask anything else, but you continue to offer information.

"He likes reading. Really smart guy...but kind of no nonsense type. Very straight to the point," You begin to feel a little nervous so you pretend to read your own book with a small shrug.

The silence is deafening.

"I suspect that type of person will be hard to put up with," he suddenly says aloud and you chuckle in response.

"Possibly, but he seems to be putting up with me too...I guess?"

He suddenly closes his book and leans forward to pry the one in your hands away. He locks his gaze with you. "...'Putting up' is hardly the word I would use." his lips twitch the slightest bit before continuing. "He has little to no patience for other people...so if he keeps you around...perhaps it signals something else,"

"Something else...As in, I'm special?"

Again he quiets for a moment, before he stands up, chair scraping the floor. "...Precisely," he turns to start walking out of the library, waving a hand behind him. "I'll pick you up in the morning tomorrow,"

Ayato

"I do, but he's a very busy sort of man,"

Ayato "Is that so?" he pours tea for you.

"Quite. He's also a very important person,"

He hums and watches the billowing steam from the tea. "It sounds as if I might know this person," but he genuinely doesn't know it's him, he just thinks its another noble.

"...You most definitely know him. He has a sister. Lovely girl." This is where you avert your gaze from him in fear of him instantly connecting the dots.

He talks in pauses "A...sister..." His mind is starting to make connections but he can't be quite sure yet. So he prods further. "...Does she happen to have a vision?"

"A cryo vision holder, yes," you're biting the inside of your lip at this point. There's a moment of silence before you hear Ayato laughing rather gleefully, like he was amused by a story.

"I see." he ends with a chuckle. "I apologize for being so busy, Y/N," he smiles at you "I promise I'll do my best to arrange my priorities in order to spend more time with you,"

Baizhu

"He takes his job too seriously and can be quite reckless...Sometimes he even puts himself in danger,"

Changsheng catches on immediately. The snake had already known for a while. Baizhu was just being dense. "Oh here we go," the snake half whines.

Baizhu gives it a weird look before turning his attention back to you. "That does sound reckless,"

"I've told him a couple of times to think about himself too...but I guess he's just really passionate about his job,"

Baizhu sort of shrugs, "What IS his job?"

"...Well for starters he owns a pharmacy around town,"

To Baizhu the realization hits all too slowly. It's not that he was slow or dense, but he was having a hard time believing that it was him you were talking about, specially when you hadn't said it outfront.

"...You do realize I'm the only one who owns a pharmacy around town?" he asks, eyes piercing through you and awaiting your answer.

Changsheng is the one who answers for you. "Yes you ridiculous doctor, Y/N's pertaining to you!"

It's the first time you've seen him blush and he turns his head away when he does so. "I-I see, well...that's rather, unexpected...but not unwelcome,"

Clears his throat "Just give me a moment"

Changsheng would roll its eyes if it could.

Bennett

"Has a lot of energy...Sometimes I wonder where he gets all of it. I really like him for that though."

Deflates as soon as you start talking about your "crush". What kind of answer was he expecting anyway? That you had eyes for him?

"He has a bit of a...problem when it comes to luck," you continue

Bennett stops, you look at him and you can practically see the gears in his head starting to turn a little faster.

"Y-Y/N? Are you talking about..." then the gears suddenly stop. "Oh what am I saying, it can't be. Ahahaha! Let's go!" starts walking again as if nothing happened

Your jaw drops and you're forced to just DIRECTLY tell him you're talking about him.

"...Oh...Oh! F-For real?! Oh...Sorry... I just thought... there's no way! B-But, I'm really glad! Really!"

Chongyun

"Hmm...He's a little shy...but he's very responsible,"

Chongyun stares at you intently and nods as if taking notes.

"He doesn't like spicy stuff,"

Chongyun nods twice, eagerly.

"He's very dedicated in learning about thaumaturgy,"

Chongyun blanks out, brows furrow but still nods. Slowly.

"He's really good with a claymore too!"

Chongyun stops and stares at you, you see a hint of red gracing his cheeks "Y/N...You can't possibly be...talking about... m-m-m-"

Can't seem to say it, so you outright say that it is, in fact, him.

Combusts into a tomato red

Cyno

"How do I say this...He's a pretty strict guy." The two of you are playing Invokation TCG during this convo.

"Mmhmm..." Cyno is focused on his cards, frankly he doesn't give a craps ass who you're into. He didn't even know why he asked, he just dug himself a hole.

"...but he really only takes his work seriously. It's his job to be serious, I guess. I think that's what Matras need to do," he finished his turn and its yours now, though he's still studying his cards intently. Until you get to the Matra part.

"He's a Matra?" You rarely see a surprised face on Cyno so you focus your gaze on him. "Which one?" He further asks. Honestly he looks about to murder someone.

You blank out a bit at how intense his stare was, "Well...You know. That one, the one who's really into Invokation TCG,"

He immediately follows up without missing a beat "I don't know anyone else who's into--" then it clicks.

It was so damn silent for a good 10 seconds. You clear your throat, tear your eyes off him "Um, it's your turn,"

STILL doesn't budge until he finally goes back to his cards with a whisper, you can't really tell but he looks slightly bashful and you can barely, BARELY hear him "...If I win then we go on a date,"

"Okay, and if you lose?"

Cyno "...I'm not gunna lose,"

"See, I told you he's a really serious guy,"

Dainsleif

"I think he's a very dedicated person," you get lost in thought a little, thinking about him. "Whenever I look at him...Sometimes I feel as if there's a certain sadness in him... Perhaps he blames himself for not being able to protect his nation,"

He IMMEDIATELY knows. And he knows that you hurt for him too. How could he not?

"He searches for answers... I don't know for how long, I suppose a long, long time," you close your eyes, imagining how long he must have been wandering Teyvat.

You only open your eyes when you feel a hand brush against yours. He's looking straight at you, neither happy nor sad. "...You don't have to feel that way, for my circumstances,"

The brush against your hand disappears and reappears next to your cheek, his fingers gently resting on it "...Knowing that you feel that way, has taken away some of the burden that I shoulder,"

His gaze suddenly hardens and his voice drops to a whisper, "But please, just don't end up in the same way as everyone else,"

Diluc (I don't know why I end up writing a whole novel for this guy. I guess he's my OG favourite)

You pause for a moment, wondering how to describe Diluc. "...Sometimes... I feel as if I know a lot about him and yet... he's still far off in the distance,"

Diluc, rifling through paperwork, doesn't even look at you. "...That tells me nothing about him," there's a bit of bite in his statement.

You sigh a little, "I mean, simply said he's a hardworking man. He always has Mondstadt's best interests in mind...but he prefers to work alone,"

He's silent, but you can still hear the paper shuffling.

"....but people love him. They care for him. I suppose I understand why he keeps a distance but..." at this point you don't even realize that you're just rambling and staring into space. Sort of in a daze of thinking out loud. "...isn't it lonely? ...I suppose I shouldn't assume how he feels. Maybe he's fine with it...I just wonder how long till he sees us..." there's silence, no ruffle of papers, you're still just staring at the bookshelf and you continue in a monotone voice. "...or sees me,"

You blink, and all of a sudden its as if a magic spell is cast on you and you wake up to the reality that you've been rambling about him. You sit up straight "Oh," then turn to him with a careful smile. You don't think he knows what or who you're talking about anyway. "I better get going," you stand, "Jean must be waiting for me."

You leave, and he doesn't stop you.

You don't really think anything of it, feeling as if your whole monologue was very vague...but to your surprise he knocks at your door in the evening, there's a bit of rain falling.

"Diluc? You're drenche--"

"I see you,"

The determination in his voice lulls you to keep quiet and only stare up at him, wondering if he had more to say, but instead of saying something, he leans in, wrapping his arms around you and resting his forehead on your shoulder, as if he had been defeated.

You only welcome his embrace, and, for the first time in a long time. Diluc finally feels like he's home.

Gaming

"Passion!" You nod your head as you say it. "He knows what he wants to do and is incredibly dedicated to it!"

Gaming looks surprised, has no idea you're talking about him. "Huh! That's really cool!" He thinks he's the total opposite. "Wish I could be as dedicated as him."

You kind of laugh out loud and he raises his eyebrows and tilts his head. "What?"

"Gosh you really sell yourself short," you shake your head "Anyway, this guy, right, he kinda works two jobs," you put out your hand to count one and two "One, for the Secure Transport Agency and two, he's in a Wushou Troupe,"

Gaming instantly straightens his back and looks at you wide-eyed. You figure you had to be direct when it came to him otherwise he'd never get it with how modest he was.

"...You're...talking about...me?" You smile at him sympathetically.

"You know, Gaming, I wish you saw yourself the way others saw you. You're a great person,"

Big smile, but legit looks like he's about to cry. "Between the two of us? I think you're greater Y/N,"

Heizou

"...Honestly he's kind of a flirt," you raise your eyebrows at the fact and kind of question yourself why you like this kind of person. "Makes me wonder if he does that to everyone, you know?"

Heizou hums and puts his hand under his chin in a "thinking position"

"That's not enough evidence to go by. Perhaps we can investigate this guy together to see if he's worthy,"

You look at him, pursing your lips while musing and giving him a suspicious look. You're not sure if he's figured it out.

He's got no idea. I mean, it was a pretty general description. "Any distinguishing features?" he asks.

You look at him in a deadpan manner. "Red hair, I guess. And moles under his eyes,"

He looks back at you with a matching blank face.

Then breaks into a wide, close eyed grin. "I see! From experience, that person is truly trustworthy,"

You sigh a little, "Is he though?"

He chuckles heartily. "I promise you he is," offers you his hand with a genuine smile. "Let me show you,"

Itto

"Ummm... big, tall, strong looking guy. Intimidating at first look but he's actually a dork," you explain.

Itto crosses his arms above his chest with an unamused face. "Tch! No way! Ain't no one taller than me in Inazuma!" Then he looks smug again. "Anyway, keep goin'. What else?" Only asked you because he wants to see what your "type" is.

"...Popular? Nah... Infamous is the word, I think. He kinda gets into a lot of trouble,"

Itto raises a brow "You serious? Whaddyou want with someone like that?" as if he wasn't a troublemaker himself.

"I mean... He also loves life and somehow always sees the good side of things."

Itto "Eh... guess that's a good thing..." folds his arms behind his head and huffs.

This guy is never gunna get it so you drop more obvious hints. "He's an oni who has his own gang."

For a split second he looked like he was going to get it, and then... "WHAT?! There's another oni who wants to challenge the Arataki Gang?"

"That's not what I--"

punches his fist onto his palm "Lead the way Y/N, let me at 'em!"

"I'm talking about you!"

"Huh?"

"Itto, there's no other oni around town!" leave it to him to make you exasperated.

He quiets for a few seconds. "...But Y/N..."

You expectantly stare at him, curious what he was going to say about your confession.

"...Did you just call me a dork?"

Of course that's what he picks up on.

When he finally processes it though, he's stoked and on an all time high.

Kaeya

"...good at talking to people, and he knows it... Exudes charisma like he breathes air," You're saying this with a glare.

He chuckles and rests his head on his fist. "Why, pray tell, do you look angry when saying that?"

"Not angry..." you mumble under your breath, eyes trailing away from him. "Just... probably a lot of people like him,"

"And you don't like that?" He smirks. He totally knows.

"...No...Well...I'm okay with it... It's just... I think he's so much more than what he shows to others,"

That, he wasn't expecting. He actually feels genuinely touched.

"Sure he jokes around a lot...Is good at making people feel comfortable...but he's also kind...and you can always count on him," there's a faraway gaze in your eyes now, a small smile on your face. "To me, he's...a safe space."

Kaeya's smile drops. It looks like he's unhappy and you think that maybe you've made a mistake. Still...there's no way he knows that it's him, right? It was kinda vague...

You're about to stand and excuse yourself but he catches your wrist easily. "...You know..." he starts, meeting you eye to eye. He looks at you as if he's looking into your soul, his eyes the gentlest you've seen them.

"You make it so hard, not to fall deeper in love with you,"

Lyney (I have no idea how this ended up so dramatic)

"He isn't exactly a trickster...but he has a lot of tricks up his sleeve,"

Lyney "Oh?" Raises an eyebrow. Something kind of clicks in him, but he shakes it off. "The good kind or the bad kind?"

You stall a little, thinking of the answer, knowing that he's Fatui. "The...good...kind,"

"You don't sound very sure," he gives you a lopsided smile.

"It's complicated," you admit. "Regardless of the circumstances though, I think he's a great magician,"

You watch his face turn into surprise quite quickly, but he still looks and feels unsure of himself. "Oh, perhaps...I can learn a thing or two from him?"

Your smile turns forced and hard. He can't be serious? He STILL doesn't know, or...what?

"I...Well..." You don't know what to say next, but he seems to get the idea.

"Sorry, have I put you in a hard place? Ahaha..." Scratches the back of his head. "My apologies, I was just curious,"

This, for some reason, really puts you off and you feel as if you've been rejected, even though you technically had not outright told him that you're talking about him.

It seems silly for you to get upset, but you are. So you stand, and make a request of him. "Can we... just pretend this conversation didn't happen?" and you give him some sort of excuse that you need to run an errand or something, and you're off, leaving him feeling...guilty. But he doesn't know why. Or does he?

Lyney would look like the type of person who would be confident about himself. But, really, as a magician, he had to be 1000% sure about something before he went ahead with it, and so...that's where his doubt stemmed from.

Lynnette is really the one who knocks some sense into him. "...and you...let Y/N leave?" after hearing the story from him.

"Oh, Lyney... Regardless of what Y/N feels... For you, next to Freminet and I, is there someone else that you love dearly?"

That's how he ends up at your doorstep. Though you've seen his disappearing rose trick hundreds of times, he was the most sincere at that moment, when he says sorry that he didn't get the hint and to give him a chance.

Neuvillette

"Serious person. He seems to put his work first, above all else," you say. "I respect him a lot for that,"

Neuvillette is interested in what you say, but doesn't know at all that it's him. "He does sound quite respectable," he says while looking through some files.

"A long time ago he said that he feels like he's an outsider...but really I feel like there isn't anyone who knows Fontaine the way that he does,"

Neuvillette, moves the file he was reading downwards, just to look at you questioningly. "He's from Fontaine?" this was surprising to him.

"Well...he currently resides in Fontaine, yes," you nod.

"Ah," he answered curtly. "And I have never met him?" he asks.

"...He's very busy." you bite your lip, about to say something and you know that the next sentence is the point of no return. "He's the Iudex...so it's hard to catch him,"

You swear you can hear your heart hammering in your chest.

You see him put his files down and just stare at you with a sort of...unsure look.

His shoulders relax, he wasn't even aware he had been tense that whole time. "That... must have taken a lot of consideration and courage to say," he clears his throat.

You only nod your head slowly, moving your gaze away from him with an awkward smile. Hand absentmindedly grabbing a book and flipping through the pages...you had no idea what you were doing out of nervousness.

"I apologize...I'm unfamiliar with what to do in these kinds of situations... However," he pauses and seems to think carefully about what he was going to say next. "Please don't take it as a rejection. I'd be honored to navigate this with you, if you would so graciously have me,"

Scaramouche

"He's an asshole," you bite back a laugh.

He instantly knows.

"Actually he acts all tough only to give in to his inner-kind-of-agreeable-personality,"

He snorts

"What? Am I wrong?" you challenge him. You KNOW that he knows. The two of you have been hovering around each other for a while, and there's a certain closeness between the two of you. Though that line was never crossed.

He doesn't answer you back but prods you more. "Is that all? You like that he's an asshole? Are you some type of masochist?"

You almost laugh. "No, you moron. I'm saying he has a weird way of showing he cares. He's always biting my head about not being careful enough. But if he really didn't care he wouldn't be screaming at me, you know what I mean?"

Scaramouche grumbles something under his breath and crosses his arms, turning away from you.

"Say that again?" You ask, not hearing what he said.

"...I said, you're not as stupid as I thought you were," shrugs his concealed embarrassment off and turns back to you all nonchalant again. "Anyway, stop yapping and get going, we got things to do,"

Snatches your hand and starts pulling you to walk with him.

Tartaglia (I feel like this is ridiculously short but I also feel like Tartaglia would have known a LONG time ago if the two of you had the feels for each other)

"Oh man...Probably the most reckless man I know,"

Also knows. Instantly. But shuts his mouth just so he can listen to you talk about him, but it gets deep real quick.

"In my opinion he's a handsome guy. Real charming," you smirk the tiniest bit. "but I don't know if I can keep up with him, honestly. It's a little hard not knowing when he's going to come back...or if he's even gunna come back at all,"

You weren't going to hide the fact that you were scared shitless he didn't return from Fontaine for ages. You legitimately thought he had died.

Tartaglia stops you there, by suddenly cradling your cheek. "Y/N," he's wearing a pained expression. "I'm sorry,"

"Don't be, it's your job, right?" You reassure him, and shrug.

He sighs "Yes, but I'll promise this to you as I've promised my family," he smiles, the most confident smile you've seen on him. Even more confident than when he wields his blades. "I'll come back to you, I always will,"

Wriothesley

"Er... How do I say this... He kind of has some... big boss energy?"

"Oh?" he sips at his tea, glancing at you while he looks at today's paper. "So he's a bigshot?" he asks curiously.

"Somewhat, yes. Intimidating at first look, but...he just has a great sense of responsibility," you pick at the selection of cakes and cookies he has.

"Huh," he lets out in a quick huff. In the deepest, DEEPEST parts of his mind there is a NANOSECOND that he thinks its him but it gets erased so quickly he's not even sure that he had thought about it.

"Sounds like a good person... Any interesting, weird quirks?" he grins as he says this, yet again glancing at your expression.

Your lips tremble a bit at what you're about to say, because you're SURE he was going to get it once you say it. You gulp and feel the hairs at the back of your neck stand before you say out loud "He likes tea. I kind of wonder if it's an addiction," you can't meet his eyes.

He's looking at the paper he's reading but nothing.registers.in.his.brain.its.like.it.stopped.working.

You shift in the uncomfortable silence but he calmly folds up the newspaper and places it on his table. "...I'm inclined to ask, because it would be embarrassing if I got the wrong idea,"

"Mmhmm," you pop a cookie in your mouth to distract yourself.

"By any chance, are you...talking about me?"

"Mm," you nod your head, still not looking at him and glue your eyes on the cookies instead, out of embarrassment.

Suddenly chuckles. You brave a peek at him, now covering his eyes with a single hand, head tipped back to rest on his chair.

You're not sure if that's a good or bad thing.

"Sorry, no, it's just... I didn't think it would happen this way." Visibly takes in a big breath and sighs it out slowly. Seems to have regained his composure and is back to his confident self, smiling at you. "Thanks Y/N, I... don't think it's much of a secret that I enjoy your company too. I'm just a little embarrassed that you beat me to it...some big boss energy huh?"

Xiao

"...He takes on everything by himself. I worry about him," You look at the stars as you say this. Xiao doesn't say anything.

"But I'm glad that he's opening up a lot more now. It's great to see him among friends,"

Xiao has a feeling at this point, that its him you're talking about, but he still doesn't say anything and keeps his gaze in front of him rather than on you.

"Yes, the road in front of him is long but...he's also already come a long way," you sigh a little "The time of Rex Lapis has long gone, but he still sticks to his principles. I think his dedication is part of what I like about him,"

This is when he turns to you, blank look on his face, contemplating on what to do. When you turn to meet his gaze, its then that he decides to bridge the gap between the two of you, shoulder to shoulder, leaning in sideways to catch your lips in a chaste and rather shy kiss.

"You should give a bit of credit to yourself, for putting up with me all these years, Y/N,"

End!

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[tbhimnoteasyonmyself]

Who is White?

If it is not I, your friendly neighbourhood non-binary deranged literature major, once again to tell you about stuff that the voices™︎ have prompted me.

This time, let's talk about the elephant in the room, the odd one out: Mr. White, a.k.a the fandom's babyboy.

(me as Fluke in this GIF, walking in ready to dissect this bitch)

So, what do we factually know about this man?

From what we're directly told in the show:

He's Tee's boyfriend, at least, since 12th grade, meaning they have been together for about 3 years, maybe 4 (depending on when exactly we are in terms of time in the present and when exactly during 12th grade they started dating).

He's younger than the rest of them, according to Por and Top in episode 1.

He studied at a different school from the main gang AND from Phee (yes, despite the embroidery having a similar colour, the writings where the institution's name should be are nothing alike, thus, not from the same place)

He cares a lot about his appearance (he does skincare when Por is literally dying downstairs and he sees a rash on his body while under the effect of New's absynthe - idk if it's absynthe or not but my friends and I have been calling it that since we saw them drink the green drinks so it's absynthe for me and there's that).

He's generally a very respectful person (he always speaks formally and nicely to everyone, even when people are hostile to him, like Tee or Fluke).

His fear doesn't seem to paralyze him in high-pressure situations (he strikes people with a tripod twice to save himself and others when he thinks they're in danger).

Another source could be the Yearbook, which, now, we have to be a bit more skeptical about because, as seen in New's case, it's not 100% accurate. One can argue that it is accurate because the yearbook would have Tan's info, since that's who he's living as and no one knows any better than that, including the institutions and, sure, yeah, fair. But while we don't know that White is hiding anything from us as well, we can't be sure of it. So, take the following with a grain of salt:

(translated with Google Translate)

His legal name is Watcharin Siriphan

He was born on the 25th of February 2005 (which confirms what Por and Top say)

His blood type is A (which according to the Blood Type Personality Theory means he is shy, stubborn, a perfectionist, polite and hard-working, apparently. tbh this thing is super shifty, no source seems to agree on the meaning of each type and, of course, it's a pseudoscience and all, so... yeah. take it as you will)

He's studying Software Engineering

He likes cakes

He dislikes cockroaches

He plays games and programs in his free time

So... We don't know much. He's the most generic person ever. Like... I too, and half the world's population, like cake, dislike cockroaches and like to play games. It's not exactly very special. Which is exactly why he is so intriguing. After all, we had 5 whole episodes so far, which were just the backstory of the people we see together in the mansion in the present. We've seen their personalities, their qualities and flaws, what they did and what they didn't do. We've been given a reason as to why they're here. Not just in the more direct sense of "they agreed to come here for Jin's goodbye party" but of why exactly they needed to be put all together in these conditions for this story. All except White. White is just... Barely an afterthought. We're shown when he comes into this story for the group (when he becomes Tee's boyfriend), but we're not given a reason so far as to why the narrative wants him there.

Because, sure, IRL people sometimes end up in random places and things can be pretty meaningless but this is a work of fiction. One that, evidently, has been greatly focused on details (Non's framed apple picture and Phee eating an apple alone, for example, or the correlation between the group and the colour blue). So why would it just throw us a character that is, seemingly, irrelevant to the story?

And to this, there are 2 possibilities my friends: either White is a narrative tool to get to the audience or White is not who we think he is. So let's explore it, shall we?

White = Narrative Tool

Let's start by assuming, possibly the most likely outcome, that White is exactly just a guy who ended up there due to his connection to Tee. Why would this narrative need that character?

Glad you asked. Because he's the only person who's 100% innocent. If he's just some guy who, as we've seen, keeps being respectful and nice and trying to always do the right thing, then he's got nothing to do with the others who, in different degrees are all guilty of something. He's the odd one out.

Because, yes, this is not a show of villains (at least, not in which concerns the main characters). They're all morally grey. But they have some drop of black that makes them grey.

Por is arrogant and a liar and selfish.

Tee is aggressive and manipulative and a control freak.

Top is an overall asshole and a coward.

These 3 actively bully Non. Por steals his work. Tee and Top blame him for shit he didn't do which puts in the situation where he owns Por and they spy on him. Tee manipulates him into mafia money laundry and threatens him.

Fluke is selfish and refuses to take action even when he knows it's the right thing to do.

Jin's doesn't have the capability to realize that the peaceful passive way with which he normally carries himself with won't solve the issue. Plus he's overly emotional. And a bit selfish too.

They didn't help Non when it was their moral obligation to do so. And Jin records him being abused by their teacher and possibly posts it online (though that's still up for debate).

Phee is too stubborn and also overly emotional and even overly empathic.

New is obsessive and vengeful.

Phee never really helps Non because all the ways he offers Non help are the wrong ones. He almost tries to control him. And he fails. And then he tells him awful things and breaks up with him in a terribly vulnerable moment for Non. And even when he regrets it and tries to bring justice to him, he fucks Jin because he wanted to and tries to cover it up as if it was part of the plan. Sure, they were broken up, technically, but Phee himself seems to have had "take-backies" over that breaking up. So, in his mind, at least, it's fair to say he cheats on him, which is very hypocritical after how he reacts to Non being abused. And New... He tries to help sincerely because he feels guilty but he only makes things worse. Nothing is solved and their father curses them both before committing public suicide at their mom's funeral.

Non (which may be even more relevant if he's still alive) is overly independent and uncommunicative.

He doesn't tell Jin he has a boyfriend when it's clear Jin's trying to make a move on him, event though Non's not interested. He hides very important things from Phee. He commits fraud (understandably, but yeah). And yeah, he's justified in his rage and attack but... Does he ever think of how his actions affect other such as Jin, for example, who, in his eyes, is innocent? Not really.

"Oh but White won't die!", I hear you say. "The innocent people never die in slashers!! Only the people who did the killer wrong do!" And that's exactly where I have to disagree.

So, amidst a sea of grey characters, White is, funnily enough: white. He's just good. He's done nothing wrong. And the narrative needs him because, when the others die, we'll feel (to different degrees, sure, but still, we will) that there's a reason. Even if we like the characters, those deaths will make sense. But what happens when an innocent man dies? What happens when you kill the man who wasn't even supposed to be there (he joined the trip at the last minute)?

As @syrena-del-mar says in this post: "DFF is more than just a 90s slasher film imitation". It "sits at a novel intersection of genre: horror slasher on the one hand and BL on the other hand" as @brifrischu puts it here and, for that, it bends expectations and rules and subverts what are natural tropes and events of the slasher archetype. White dying is the sort of thing this narrative, and our inventive genius Sammon, would do. Because... Do you really think they're giving us grey characters instead of black ones because we're supposed not to question this revenge? Because we're supposed to be happy about this? No. Of course not. That would be dumb. If we're meant to 100% side with the killer, then why give us likeable characters as the targets? Because, and this is as much speculation as it is reading the room, we're not.

This story, I don't know how it will end, but regardless I'm pretty confident it's supposed to tell us something important about cycles of violence: that they're neverending until someone chooses peace instead. That aggression and bloodshed and revenge... They won't bring time back, they won't undo the mistakes we make, they won't restore that which is lost, they won't make the grief go away... That they won't make us feel better. More even: that they will only hurt more people, create more injustice and prompt more revenge. And, thus, perpetuate the cycle.

So what's White's role? Being the final drop into our collective cup of realization (and perhaps the characters' as well) that this revenge mission is pointless and won't solve anything. White's role is to die.

"Oh, but uncle Dang was also innocent! Is his death not enough??", I hear you ask. And well... Maybe, maybe not. I think, honestly, his death is too impersonal for us to feel too deeply about it. Like, sure, yes, it is the death of an innocent, but it's a distant innocent. It doesn't make our blood boil because we don't know shit about that man. But, for all we don't know of White's past, we've seen him cry, we've seen him scared, we've seen him fight for his life, we've seen him be a good boyfriend and a good friend. He might just be some dude but we like him. He's the fandom's babyboy, as I said. It is more impactful and it tells the story better.

But this is just a hypothesis. And it might not convince you. And that's fair. So, because I'm a persistent obnoxious fucker with a little too much free time, I'm bringing you a second theory. For this one, though... You might need a little tinfoil hat... Be prepared.

White ≠ Who He Says He Is

So, if you think just having a character be hollow and pure good in a show of very fleshed-out and grey characters is weird, even if he might be narratively relevant, then we can only assume there's something important to White's character we don't know about yet. (I'm adding this in retrospective because I forgot but this idea came to me partially from @yellingaboutkp and their great analysis of horns in the show that you can find here)

But what could that be? We've seemingly seen all the flashbacks we needed from everyone, White doesn't seem very relevant to anyone's storyline but Tee's but... We'd assume if there was something directly connected to Tee's actions and White that we needed to see, we would've. Admittedly, the next episode seems to be on its way to tell us what Tee knows about what happened to Non and Keng while they were captured by the mafia and he could be there but I think, honestly, that it goes deeper than that. And here's why: because there's a person who's even more of an odd one out then White: whoever Perth's character is.

Now, he would've been completely unsuspicious if it wasn't for one thing: Perth's presence in the promotion of this series. He's just... Always there, somehow? Like, his character has only really appeared last episode massaging Tee's uncle but he's constantly talking about this series. Plus, his name is very well credited. AND, the absolute cherry on top, his character appears in THIS poster:

Now, yeah, I understand Marketing and Publicity (it's part of my Master's, you don't have to explain it to me). So, I know this could very well just be a strategy to sell the series. After all, Perth did get a lot of attention after The Hidden Character, I know, I know. It's also a way to put his name out there for other future roles, kinda like a soft launch. Plus, this is the show that killed Us's character first when he was one of the most popular actors in the cast. HOWEVER, I'd argue that, considering the previously mentioned attention to detail, they would not have given one of their rising stars a role in this series if it wasn't important. Like... No other background character without lines (so far) was given an important actor to play it. So pardon me, but I don't buy it. Perth's character's gotta matter somehow. And, back to what I was saying, I think the next episode will be exactly where.

See, I made a poll here on the hellsite asking what y'all think happened to Non. It's this one. And it shows that, overwhelmingly, we all think Non is alive BECAUSE he was helped by the man himself:

"Okay, Dante, but, even if that's true, where does White fit in all this?" Glad. You. Asked.

Now, if we're assuming Perth's character's the one that's gonna help Non (and possibly Keng or maybe not, idk and it really doesn't matter for now), we've gotta assume he's a possible suspect for the murderer. And even more so under this optic that Non is alive. Who more than a person whose whole reality seemed to be the mafia and who might've escaped it would be okay with murdering people? Right? Or, on the contrary, that he took a liking to Non and is trying to prevent him from further digging himself a hole in life and is trying to save him from himself.

You see, I didn't watch The Hidden Character (and those who did apparently recommend it stays that way). I didn't know any of these people before except those who were in Kinnporsche. And you know what that led me to? Curiously enough, dear reader: confusing Fuaiz with Perth. So, yeah, you know where this is going... White and Perth's character might be related. Brothers, probably.

"All because you think they look alike?" Well, if you ignore the way I just explained how it would tie some very loose ends... Yeah, kinda. BUT, in my defence, it makes a lot of genetic sense.

See, no other characters in the show really look this much alike. Believe me, I tested it.

For this purpose, I tried many different sites but the one that seemed to give me the most reliable results was FaceShape. Most characters got no more than 10%, some even got 0% (e.g. New and Perth's Character). And you wanna know how much White and Perth's character got? Nearly 50%.

For comparison reasons, New and Non who are CANONICALLY brothers, got about 30%.

BUT, if this is not convincing enough, my sister and I (who share EXACTLY the same 2 parents) got lower than them.

(pls ignore the picture, I was trynna make it as accurate as possible so I took a front pic with a neutral expression. also, my sister is censored for privacy reasons)

Now... Will I claim this is irrefutable proof? No. Not at all, but think about it: if White and Perth are related that might maybe explain how Tee and White met. It might also explain that really weird scene in the pre-release trailer (albeit all scenes in that are rather odd) where White-

Yes, thank you, Obi-Wan. And Anakin Tee is looking up at him, as if White has more power than Tee does. Because then, it could probably mean that White knows something and is probably there to do something. What exactly? Idk, man. He could be there to ensure the group remains clueless/confused or that they remain where they need to be for things to work... Or he could be there to try and prevent stuff from happening much to the likeness of what I stated for Perth's character's case.

"Oh, but if he knows something, wouldn't he know what happened to Non? Why would he be curious to watch the recording??"

Well, not necessarily. We know Non is not communicative and that he doesn't typically share his problems with anyone (the exception being Keng, obviously, but then again, the exception confirms the rule). And sure, Keng might be more talkative but idk if he would say something if Non asked him not to. I have a feeling he probably wouldn't (since he has that weird thing JJ mentioned about how he "loves Non" and, therefore, even if he's an abuser, he doesn't perceive himself that way and wouldn't do something he actively thinks would hurt Non). So, while Perth's character would know what happened to Non while he was being held by Tee's uncle and even some things about why he is there, he probably wouldn't know the rest.

But then why would he date Tee? Well, this is a narrative so... Foils are something that can happen. Having White and his relationship with Tee be a parallel to that of Phee and Jin is not weird and, in fact, has happened in the very first episode when both couples arrive at the room where the singles are, in pairs. Therefore, it wouldn't be weird to think of White as someone who maybe also fell in love with the guy that was supposed to be a means to an end or, alternatively, and perhaps more interestingly, have White NOT be in love with him and actually succeed, unlike Phee. Thus, drawing the comparison that, while Tee and White are in a relationship, White didn't fall in love and, inversely, while Phee and Jin aren't in a relationship, Phee did fall in love.

And this would mean that all we've seen of White's fear might, in fact, be an act to throw suspicion off of him. Or even more justified because he knows exactly what's lurking in the woods... After all, why would he suddenly join Jin's goodbye party if he's not a friend of Jin's? What reason better than to tag along your boyfriend's getaway with his friends if not to protect him from the terrible consequences of his actions?

But I get it. It's an extremely convoluted theory and, in all honesty, maybe makes the show more dull and boring if it's true because... Why would they repeat this "secret brother" twist? Or the dating with second intentions trope? It could be a narrative parallel, yes, but I can also definitely see how people could point that out as uncreative or lazy writing.

Either way: these thoughts were circling around my head and, before the next episode confirms or destroys them, I wanted to get them out into the world for y'all to, maybe, hopefully, join in on the hype for it, as it's less than 24h 'till it airs. Hope in that I was successful, at the very least.

Anyway... As usual feel free to (politely) argue with me, tell me I'm wrong, tell me I missed this and that, add to it, etc... Because if there's one thing I currently love more than DFF itself, it's definitely the fandom and I want us to make the most of it!!

I'll see y'all tomorrow when we're freaking out about episode 10!!!

All the love! 💜💜💜

[borgialucrezia]

okay i know you've mentioned/answered this a million times but i would love to get your top recommendations for borgias published books and content.

i haven't really ventured into those selections but i really want to take the leap into that realm and buy/borrow some books and read them..!

(also i'm curious if you read many fanfictions for the borgias, and if so do you have any good recs?)

💞

hi <33! no worries at all! i love being asked questions about everything related to the borgias, as i get very enthusiastic about them. now, let's start with my favorite borgias biographies:

maria bellonci's 'lucrezia borgia' because i'm very obsessed with accuracy and avoiding cliché biased narratives. it's such a solid read really! it also portrays lucrezia in a way that i've always believed she was—a completely misunderstood woman who is a pawn in the power and ambition games of her father and brother. but deep down, she's just a silly, pretty poetry lover who's guilty by association. this book also debunks cesare's supposed "jealousy" towards juan as the shows how much he loves him (based on the letters to each other) and that rodrigo has always loved his children equally, which is a cherry on top lol.

emma lucas's 'lucrezia borgia.' while it's not entirely accurate because it satisfies my beloved (but not accurate) 'lucrezia is a femme fatale and not saintly' narrative (which i love, by the way), i'm fascinated by how it unexpectedly delves deep into her family, especially rodrigo, cesare, and juan. it also provides great anecdotes about the characters so there's that. despite having negative reviews, the biography is actually very well-written and highly entertaining! fuck the gossip!

christopher hibbert's 'the borgias and their enemies.' for some reason, i keep forgetting to recommend this book to my friends. i tend to get easily investedwith any borgia book that focuses on the pope and his children, providing narratives without forcing you to choose what to believe. the author obviously conducted extensive research before publishing it because when reading a biography (not historical fiction), i prefer to avoid biased perspectives that can be heavily misleading. i also appreciate the fact that machiavelli (and other important figures) plays an important role in this biography because i'm always excited about him.

ferdinand gregorovius' 'lucretia borgia according to original documents and correspondence of her day'. it's also a very unbiased excellent piece of history that is full of validated source. and i just adore how the author is pro-lucrezia as well.

samantha morris' 'cesare and lucrezia: brother and sister of history's most vilified family' is also well documented and well researched! while cesare was given more depth than lucrezia, still, lucrezia's character in this biography is more colorful. obviously the most popular narrative for the borgia family is them being incestuous, corrupt and violent, a family to be feared, but the author suggests otherwise as she sets out to prove this is not the full story and she does make a good argument! as she detailed how they've been portrayed by mainstream media as well as detailing what happened to their descendants.

sarah bradford's 'lucrezia borgia.' okay, so this one isn't a favorite of mine, but i'd recommend it to you or anyone who's a huge fan of ceslu. it's written like a love story biography exclusively about them. while i like how she wrote about ceslu, i heavily dislike how she wrote about juan and rodrigo and how she portrayed them based on narratives from the family's enemies. the author also manipulated a letter about the envoy boccaccio, which is supposed to praise both brothers. but instead, the author just one-upped him with cesare by dunking on him, which i personally find lame and intensely inaccurate since juan borgia was pretty much loved by his wife, his family, and his friends based on the retrieved documents and letters. that being said, i do enjoy the ceslu parts, of course, and i believe any fan of showtime's 'the borgias' who ships ceslu would enjoy this book and its fluent writing and can easily ignore the negatively inaccurate narratives about the other members of the family.

that's all for the biography books! now let's start with historical fiction:

sarah dunant's 'blood and beauty'. one thing about me is that i'm never gonna stop praising this book because it is absolutely my favorite historical fiction book about this extraordinary family! again, i get so invested in any book when the author does extensive research. also, if you're looking for a book about this family that reads like an episode of showtime's 'the borgias,' then this book is your go-to! full of interesting dynamics, and yes, cesare is as cruel and megalomaniacal as history and machiavelli portrayed him, lucrezia as a victim of her father and brother's political ambitions game, and juan as the flawed kid who was eventually sunk deep when he got dragged into his father's ambitions game. while the book doesn't provide a deeper exploration of the characters' psyche, it's more focused on the story by making it very engaging and sheds light on their complex relationships and their rise to power. and every character is highly sympathetic as the author brilliantly humanizes them. in short, it is emotionally intriguing and a must-read for the borgias enjoyers.

mario puzo's 'the family'. you know, i wasn't even surprised a bit that this book's writing and story being groundbreaking because after all, it is written by the author of 'the godfather'. the family is such a compelling book, such tender writing when it comes to lucrezia and cesare. the story becomes intriguing the more you read. i also loved puzo's portrayal of rodrigo as this family man who deeply loves his children yet he uses them as pawns (which is also similar to jeremy irons' portrayal). while i gotta criticize that the characters have no depth and his version of lucrezia as this damsel angel for her father and brother is, uhhh… quite boring. i like her when she's multilayered lol. i also think the way he tried to present cesare and give him the "from zero to hero" trope in order to make him relatable is also lame because cesare's success as a historical figure is because he was calculating and wicked, and definitely not a bitter loser. i mean, i could absolutely ignore the bitterness part, but at least françois arnaud's cesare added so many layers and swag in the characters, therefore you could ignore it. but i can overlook all that when there's an engaging story and great writing, no matter what the characterizations are like. so overall, it's impressive and entertaining, and you will definitely enjoy it.

regarding fanfiction; i'm sorry but i never read any because i feel quite satisfied by all 'the borgias' show canon that we have and all these historical books. i wish i could help with recommending fics :/

thank you very much for the question, and i hope this post answers it. have a great day 💕🫶

[galedekarios]

Am I the only one who thinks that something very different is happening in some people's games from mine? Cause I still keep seeing people talking about how gale is constantly trying to get in their pants and ???? even when romancing him you literally can't have sex until well into act 2, and he has no romance content unless the player makes the first move in the weave scene. He's actually one of the most subtle of the companions on this, several of the others very blatantly come onto you whether you've ever chosen romance dialogue with them or not. But it's gale people talk about. I'm confused what is actually happening when they say that

no, you're not the only one. i think anyone who pays the least bit of attention to and/or actually played gale's romance storyline for themselves will understand that his romance is a slowburn.

people keep regurgitating the crap they've heard from someone else and now it's turned into this bizarre twilight zone take of who gale is and how his romance is.

those scenes simply do not exist where he "constantly tries to get into your pants". gale has very few scenes that are or can be romantic: the weave scene. the conversation at the tiefling party. the flirt in the shadow-cursed lands. last night alive scene. the boat scene.

like you pointed out, if you want to romance gale, you as the player have to actively choose options to express an interest in him and actively choose to pursue him at several points:

during the weave scene, it's you as the player who has to imagine a kiss or a romantic walk. during the tiefling party, it's once again you who have to flirt with him. you have to actively initiate any sort of romance with him since gale doesn't do it on his own for various reasons.

i've also seen people like to blame this perception on his release bug, but i honestly think it's more or less just an excuse to perpetuate negativity and hate directed at a character they already disliked.

if it was truly just the bug, then i wonder where the same energy was for k*rlach, who for the longest time had the same bug if you romanced gale. the option to tell her that you were in a relationship with him never went away, even when you picked it several times, and she took rejection much worse. nvm that even without bugs, she wakes you up in the middle of the night going "i want to ride you until you see stars" once your approval gets high enough. but no, it's crickets.

the simple truth is that many of the companions come on much stronger, much much earlier in the game. k*rlach is just an example here (lae does it too, ast*rion, etc) - and that isn't meant as criticism or hate against those companions btw, they're all different people with different stories and different characters and it makes sense for them.

it's the double standard of the fandom that gets me.

you don't have to like gale. feel free to hate him. but at least hate him accurately lol.

[velvees-archive]

save for the dual destinies dlc case, i’ve finished my first play through of the mainline ace attorney games. incredibly solid series. i have a draft with my thoughts on each case in the aj trilogy + game ratings. dunno if i’d wanna post it though, it’s kinda long.

so instead, i’ll post some misc thoughts about phoenix and edgeworth portrayals across mainline/aai + my personal favorite interpretations of them by the writing team!

spoilers for AA mainline and AAI duology

by far, my favorite phoenix portrayal is og trilogy phoenix. the way he interacts with his environment and the people around him is very authentic, albeit rude as hell (which, in hindsight, is even more authentic for phoenix, so…). saw someone’s tumblr post mention that phoenix is such a “straight guy” which…yeah LMAO. real to life accuracy, so much so it’s infuriating. i think what i’ve played of dd’s dlc case captures what i wanted to see from post-trilogy phoenix in that he’s still an asshole and comically stupid, but not actually stupid, if ykwim. something i disliked abt the rest of aa5 and aa6 is how the writing team watered his character down to the following two oversimplifications: “phoenix only wins cases bc he bluffs!” and “uhh...what evidence does phoenix present now?”

don’t mistake a silly man for a stupid man. mia calls phoenix a genius in the og trilogy. phoenix dives in head first but he’s meticulous when it comes to drawing out the truth. most of all, he doesn’t outwardly show how frazzled he is (see that one drew misham quote about phoenix quietly watching the court as he’s accused of forging evidence), even if he feels that way. i get the colorful usage of expressions is for comedic effect but it just makes him look like he doesn’t know wtf he’s doing, and that’s a disservice to his character. yes, he bluffs, but he isn’t clueless. anyway, i’m excited to replay the first trilogy now that i “know” second trilogy phoenix. that might also just be my way of saying “give me back MY phoenix”, bc the last time i’m (mostly) on board w his portrayal is in aa4, and even then i didn’t like the dialogue in his forged evidence trial.

*though, as of writing this, i’ve seen some good arguments abt his forged evidence trial dialogue that make me think ok maybe it was actually pretty accurate. let’s see wht i think on replay

on the other hand, my favorite edgeworth—at least in principle—is post-apollo justice edgeworth. in many ways, i think how he’s portrayed at 35 is how he would’ve been had dl-6 not occurred, barring his career choice. still a bit pompous, still fairly mean (at least on the surface, we all know he cares more than he lets on) and perhaps a bit uptight, but self-assured and just. the writing team makes a point to show that edgeworth doesn’t care about prestige or fancy titles. that feels like him in a way post-first trilogy edgeworth doesn’t. this particular point was fleshed out in aa1 and rfta, tho, so idk if i can give yamazaki credit for it.

there are some things that will always bother me abt post-first trilogy edgeworth (the problems are present in the aai duology as well) where the writing team shoves him into a box teeming with boring tropes for his character archetype.

an example:

creds for both these pictures: me

edgeworth is fine w pictures in the first trilogy, but comes to hate them in the aai duology.

ik it’s small but honestly what was the reason? what justification is there for this outside of wanting to fit edgeworth into a “cold character” stereotype?

bridge to the turnabout and turnabout ablaze are only about a month apart. i’m not buying into the sudden aversion to picture taking, regardless how minute a criticism it is. in any case, i feel like what i’m trying to say comes through w these screenshots: yamazaki’s edgeworth is always just a little off.

i am forgetting where i saw the post and i have too many liked posts to scroll thru to find it again but i saw a reblog?? tumblr post?? abt yamazaki and takumi’s diff approaches to edgeworth, where takumi says edgeworth listens to trot while yamazaki thinks he’d listen to classical music, and if that doesn’t drive the point home, idk wht will.

why then, did i enjoy post-aj edgeworth most? short answer is i’m taking liberties w his development and its implications. while i never completely buy into post-aa3 edgeworth, i can digest and get behind most of him when i’m not nitpicking, unlike w post-aj phoenix. does edgeworth feel a little uninspired and one- as opposed to three-dimensional? yeah, but his core is so strong i can overlook it. i’ll miss seeing a developed edgeworth when replaying the trilogy. him at 35 makes me feel warm inside.

anyway, i didn’t intend to start hating when i made this post bc i ultimately still believe the second trilogy was pretty good, if not overly ambitious with it's storytelling. maybe i'll post that AJ trilogy review.

overall, tho, t&t and aai2 were my favorite games to come out of the franchise. i’m going to do that slow replay of the first trilogy, aai duology, and aj:aa before making final judgments.

[starry-pierrot]

Sleeping Critters

So I'm not the biggest fan of Poppy...at least until CH3 had come out. Don't get me wrong I still dislike the creators and I'll never pay for the game but the smiling critters and Dogday got me. So have this super indulgent fic! Also this is canon divergent so not 100% accurate to the lore!

Warnings: Mention of cannibalism, death. Kissy Missy is dead (Hoping she's alive in CH4)

Characters: Dogday, Reader, Poppy, Smiling Critters

After defeating the prototype you, Dogday and Poppy try to rebuild what you can of PlaytimeCo to offer whoever is left a safer home.

===================

You were tired. 

Very tired. 

About a month ago you had finally defeated the prototype, freeing whatever toys that were left in PlaytimeCo from its claws. But that also left you with a lot more work to do. You could have just left it all behind and maybe taken Poppy and Dogday with you but that wouldn’t be fair to the rest of them. 

Not to mention you did not have the space to house a partially giant dog. 

And he had wanted to stay to watch over the rest of the smiling critters…wherever they are.. Now that Catnap was out of the way they might see some reason. Which is why you were so tired. After everything had been dealt with you agreed to help Poppy and Dogday find the others, to build a new home in PlayTime Co, even if it was temporary. 

Who knew when whoever owned the damn buildings would come and legally claim them someday. Sure it’s already been years but you wouldn’t be surprised if the titles were transferred to someone else after so long. But until then rebuilding would at least make everyone more comfortable. 

The problem was that…you three had hardly found anyone just yet. Poppy knew there probably wasn’t much of the toys left but still she encouraged you to check every nook and cranny you could. So far you’ve only found a few Mini Huggy’s, a Cat-bee and a Candy cat. It’s not much but it's cute to see them all snuggled on some of the beds in the orphanage. 

 “Angel, are you sure? I can go by myself.” Dogday asked as he looked at you, the two of you were standing at the entrance to Playhouse. “You haven’t been sleeping much lately.” 

“No, I can do it. Besides I’d rather not leave you to potentially cannibalistic little fur balls if I can help it.” You manage to hold back a yawn before reaching for the door. “I’ve handled them before, I got the flares.” 

Meanwhile Dogday only had his hands and a pipe you had torn off from the wall when it was loose, you’d be more worried if you hadn’t closed his lower half with a sewing kit. And now he seems to get around alright on that little bright yellow gym scooter. But still you worry he might get overwhelmed. 

“If you say so. Just please don’t go too far from me.” Dogday urges as you open the door and slip inside. Much like the last time you visited the place was a mess, meaning those wheels on Dogday’s scooter aren’t going to be much help. 

“Seems the dog is gonna have to do a trick to get around.” You tease as you step over some toys that were left on the ground.” 

“Har har, Angel.” There was no malice in the fake laugh, planting his hands on the ground he hauled himself up into a handstand he began to follow behind you as you searched. If it was one thing that was annoying it was all the crawling you had to do, your knees weren't meant for all this crawling!

“Hey Little critters! We have food back in the orphanaaaggee!” You try to draw them out but so far the two of you haven’t seen any of them. You don’t remember seeing many on the prototype, it couldn’t have killed all of them could it? No, there were far too many. 

“Catnap is gone, you don’t have to listen to him anymore!” Dogday called out as he crawled around on his belly, “Come on you little fellas!” 

Where the heck could they be hiding? This play house wasn’t that big! Maybe if-

CRACK!

“ANGEL!” 

Suddenly the floor snapped under you, you would think you would have remembered to check that considering what happened the last time. But suddenly you were tumbling down and down..and down-what did you find a secret deep tunnel or something?!

“Ooof!” Hitting the ground hard you could help but gasp as the wind was knocked out of you, your already tired body screaming in pain from the impact. 

“Angel!?” You could barely hear him calling from the top of the hole, “ Angel are you okay?? Say something!” 

It took you a moment but eventually you turned over, “Yeah…y-yeah I’m alive.” With a groan you sat up noticing that you seem to have fallen into a hidey hole. It looked like it had been dug out, there was another hole further up but there was no way you could reach it. 

“Stay there I’ll…I’ll come find you!” Dogday said, “That or I’ll find some rope.” 

“Nowhere I can go!” You call up and after a few more moments of talking Dogday was off to find something to pull you up with. Which just left you here…alone…in a dark and quiet spot. Oh this was going to be terrible. You didn’t even have your phone or heck even a book on you. 

Sure you were fine when you were moving around but now that you had to sit here and wait in an admittedly comfortable little spot…your eyes were drooping after the first ten minutes. You knew you should have listened to Poppy when she told you to get more rest. Jerking your head up you shook yourself trying to wake yourself up a little more. But that didn’t seem like it was working much. 

“Dogday?” you tried calling up hoping that he was still nearby but with no response you had no choice but to sit and stay. “Well shit..” Your eyes grew heavier and soon against your will your eyes closed as your head dipped into the crook of your shoulder. 

Only for you to jerk awake once more which quickly turned into a little spat with your body as you tried to stay awake. Too bad your body had won out eventually. 

You had fallen asleep.  --

“Angel!” 

“Angel!!” 

You cracked your eyes open to the darkness, feeling awfully comfortable in the little hole you had fallen in. Was it always this warm down here? 

“Angel!” Dogday yelled whispered at you, frantically trying to get your attention. Looking up you could see him erratically moving a hand only to stop once he’s realized you were awake. “Oh thank god! Don’t move! I’ll l-lower the rope down!” 

He must've found some rope. Good thing because your legs were starting to cramp from the curled position you were in, “How long was-” 

“SHHHH!” He quickly hushed you. “I said don’t move! Be quiet!” 

What? “Wh-why?” 

“Sh! Sh! Just-quiet! And..don’t look down.”

 Well now you had to look down. And when you did you had to force every bit of nerve in your body to stay still, a squeak just barely escaping your lips. Even stuck in the dark you could make out a Catnap Smiling Critter sitting right on your chest, sleeping. Little growling snores filled the space and when you looked around you could see at least one of every single smiling critter either sleeping next to you or outright on top of you. 

Something touched your head and looking up revealed the rope Dogday had lowered down to you. Craftycorn had taken your right arm hostage but luckily the left one was free. 

“Just hang on…gonna t-tug you up alright?” It wasn’t much of a game plan but the idea of being tugged out only to have to run was better than staying down here in a potential feeding hole. Lifting your free arm up you almost grip the rope when you feel movement. 

Looking back down your eyes stare into the little Catnap’s eyes alight with their white pupils. The two of you stared at one another for a moment. It wasn’t attacking. But if you broke the spell that seemingly had overtaken the two of you…would it? You did come here after all to try and get them to go back with you, to save them. 

Best case scenario Dogday pops your shoulder out of your socket while pulling you up to get you away from the man eating plushies so the both of you can run. 

Worst case you become a meal. 

Taking a breath you lick your dry lips “T-the prototype is dead....we can feed you. At the orphanage.” You whispered, “I can fix you up.”  You knew the Critters were experiments made from children but did they even know that anymore? Dogday had made it sound like they still could understand what was going on like most normal children but would the years of being down here change their view point to follow the strongest out of the pack? 

Still the little creature stared at you for a long while before it bumped its head against your cheek making a little sound. 

You felt your heart beat hard in your chest as you stayed still, soon it became apparent that the little critter wasn’t going to hurt you. Lowering your arm down you carefully petted between it's ears, “Um…ya know what just let them nap for a moment.” You say while looking up at a panicked and still nervous Dogday.  --

It took almost an hour before the other Smiling critters in the hole woke up and much like the Catnap one they all just stared at you. It was a little unnerving in the dark but once Dogday pulled you up and the little critters climbed up behind you, you couldn’t help but coo a little bit at them surrounding your feet. 

“Ohh who’s an adorable little monster?” You smile as you pick up a Hoppy Hopscotch and scratch right under it's chin. Catnap had climbed up onto your shoulder and a Dogday one had been attached at your ankle. 

“Angel…please don’t tease them like that.” Dogday’s voice was flat, clearly unamused at you acting like they were adorable little creatures and not the monstrous flesh eating plushies they were. 

“But look at them!” Holding out Hoppy you pouted at the dog, “They’re harmless!...at least now they’re harmless!” 

Dogday’s eye twitched at that, “I question how much self preservation you have. Lets just get them back to the orphanage. I’m sure Poppy will be happy we found more toys.” Seems the dog still had some nerves about the critters, but it was only right considering what had happened down here.

"Okay okay, I'm coming!" Pulling Hoppy back you began walking behind the dog and the smiling critters followed closely behind. 

“I’m cooking all of you some beef.” 

--- Please like and reblog if you like!

[sirenjose]

So I've been really into your analysis lately and I'm a huge fan now, wanted to ask some questions, feel free to not answer any

1- what was your favourite idv story/event to analyze?

2- your least fav of the latter?

3- are you into anything else besides idv?

4-how do you find the motivation to analyze stuff? I've tried before and it was very draining :')

Thanks for your time, hope you have a lovely day

I'm very happy to hear you're enjoying yourself despite my own low opinion about much of what I put out. I'll do my best to answer!

Hmm I always dislike picking favorites because I'm bad at picking eheh... But the ones I liked most... I honestly enjoy T&I and COA (1-5) even more than the main story. So I think I might pick... Atropos' Ropes for T&I and for COA, thats harder... 3-5 are my faves but I might pick 4 just because of how it felt it had the most story/details given than all the rest. Even the *SONG* had story. I loved it.

Least fave, eh... Orfeo and Zinaida immediately come to mind, though Orfeo I'd say was worse... COA 1 is another primarily because of how DIFFICULT it was for me to figure it out enough to put together an analysis. And I had to rewrite that thing at LEAST 3 times to the point I'm just hoping it's good enough and leaving it alone. Time of Reunion I think is another that comes to mind, mainly because I didn't appreciate how they treated Norton in there, especially in the videos (but at least those aren't canon like the in-game event was). So based on all that, I might say Orfeo if I really had to pick 1. Then rank ToR 2nd and Zinaida/COA1 3rd.

FF14 and Honkai Star Rail especially I'm playing actively these days, but I honestly like a lot of stuff. Like Persona (espeially 4), 999 aka Zero Escape, and Star Ocean Til the End of Time. Least in terms of games.

Hmm... Maybe because the 1st reason I play a game is because of the story, and gameplay is always 2nd to me. If the story and characters are good, that gets me interested. Issue with IDV is we only get bits and pieces. Really need to look deeper to really understand some of the characters. I actually only started analyzing because I challenged myself (partially out of curiosity for the answer) to see if I could prove if Norton wasn't as evil as people thought (based on all the comments I saw when I 1st joined the fandom a long while ago). From there, there was Jose who I wanted to analyze because he honestly had so many plot holes I couldn't (and still can't completely) solve. So I get the most enjoyment analyzing something that doesn't have a clear answer. Which is why I don't always post for every letter. A big part of it is I enjoy history and culture and such, so it's fun for me to learn about different foods, or time periods, or how bad the environment was for miners or sailors back in the day, etc... I dont think I have an easy answer (I can see I'm rambling). Norton I actually only began to like because I was spending so long working on my 1st analysis for him (and my perfectionism made me analyze all of Norton's essences before i could call it finished). Jose was because I love Captain Hook, and then after because of the plot holes that bothered me. Then for others, I think I enjoy making analyses to... try to sometimes change people's opinoions/beliefs. Like with Margaretha or Vera. With Edgar was because I was more interested in his story and him as a character only once I put together all his lore. Sort of goes on from there. I could ramble on but I'm going to get even more guilty. I hope this helps somewhat, but let me know if it doesn't and I'll keep going. Maybe the simple is A) I like history/culture/research, B) I like to convince people that certain characters arent as evil as they think or change beliefs I think aren't quite accurate, C) I like solving puzzles and I love story, D) I already think too hard about literally everything, and combined with my perfectionism, we get analysis

[nightcolorz]

For the ask game: ❤️💚💙

YAYY thank u sm for the ask! these questions r so fun. I’m going off of the book fandom btw

❤: Which character do you think is the most egregiously mischaracterized by the fandom?

Louis <3 I think this is an affect of how likable and overtly sympathetic he is in the amc show but I've seen people getting genuinely offended over Louis being described in fandom (and by Anne rice herself) as a manipulative cold hearted ass who uses his perceived vulnerability and gentleness to distract from the fact that he is just as cruel if not crueler then the other vampires. Like Louis does nottt have strong morals or high empathy lmao. Book Louis weaponizes his privilege like a white woman crying to self victimize into making the other vampires look worse them him 😭 . He refuses to kill humans for a while not bcus it hurts him to take life (he actually takes more pleasure in it then most), he refuses bcus he has catholic brain the way a christians who say "how do atheists have morals without god?" do, misunderstanding that most people actually care about other people and dont need an existential threat to encourage them not to hurt others.

His moral compass is self centered and based in up keeping the appearance of self restraint and monk style lack of enjoying himself, not empathy. If a vampire killed u would u feel better if u knew he cried over how much he got off on it then flaunted his suffering over how little he indulged so that everyone knew how piosis he was 😭.

He is way worse when it comes to how he treats his victims then Armand who intentionally seeks out victims who r asking to die or Lestat who tries the vigilante approach. Louis kills innocents and he thinks it makes him better cuz he only does it sometimes and he feels really really bad about himself afterwards. As akasha said (paraphrased) he's the most predatory of them all.

To specify I love book Louis SOOOO much I love how shitty he is that's why it makes me sad when people mischaracterize him as sincere and get gen mad when ppl characterize him how he is in canon (a lying selfish bitch bless his heart). Like ik amc Louis at this point in canon is unambiguously in the right but he isn't like an accurate reflection of how he is in the books 😭 it's not like amc did what anne rice was trying to do more successfully, they just nulled what anne rice was doing in favor of a more likable protagonist. Which is fine, but like, there's no crime in preferring evil to the core horrible asshole Louis of the books.

💚: What does everyone else get wrong about your favorite character?

I think the common fandom perception of Armand as the crazy unhinged "omg I can't believe he actually did that in the books??" sadistic maniac villain guy is funny but not really accurate. Armand explicitly not only tries to avoid violence but dislikes it and finds it hard to comprehend why someone would seek out violence and conflict.

The reason he is always doing fucked up shit isn't out of a lestat-esc desire to cause chaos, it's bcus his highly strung ptsd brain has him convinced that the world is a battle ground and he must always be defending himself and acting out in violence.

Since acting out in violence is a reaction hes been taught throughout his life to be standard and necessary, as violence is something so normalized to him he considers it more of a tedious chore then a last resort measure, he usually reacts to conflict in ways that are objectively extreme to anyone who isn't thinking from his perspective. In qotd he even asks Daniel why men choose to fight in wars, explaining that he doesn't understand the draw of violence (bcus he's not a man) and he can't comprehend the supposed thrill of it.

Then he says this in pl to Gregory

💙: Which character is not as hot as everyone else seems to think they are?

i was going to say Marius but I figure that's too obvious since everyone at this point knows I don't like Marius 😭 so here's an even hotter take,,,,, Lestat ‼️

Only to a degree, I think Lestat is hot and deserves the hype, but i also think he's hot in a different way then a chunk of the fandom does. Based on his book description he's kind of wonky looking, mouth too big for his face, vaguely unnerving shallow pale skin, starved 1700s peasant build but also kind of buff in the unhealthy "i dont eat regularly but I'm strong enough to carry a wolf for miles on my back" sense, weirdly small fucking feet. He def has creepy ass florescent blue doll eyes too. my point is I think when drooling over Lestat the fandom tends to forget this wonkiness in favor of blonde bombshell, Sam Reid chizzled jawline and abs, or conventionally beautiful anime twink, when they should be appreciating lestat in all his weird as shit glory.

[ohnonotthehorrors]

Right, walk with me as I dive into Canary Curse/SecretLife Martyn lore.

The current working theories are:

A: Jimmy is a sign of doom to his allies. Most of his allies have done poorly when partnered with him (Scott, Mumbo, Tango, Joel, and now Martyn), at least in reference to their usual abilities.

B: Watchers dislike Martyn. (And Jimmy)

These are valid in my mind and pair well with the phenomenon. However, I don't think it's exactly what is happening.

Which leads me to a mildly popular theory I'm still debating about (which will be my main point of this post):

Martyn is actively sacrificing himself for Jimmy.

It's not a poor theory, but I don't think it's accurate. For one, it doesn't fit wonderfully with Martyn's character (in game), which is untrustworthy, turncoat, and survivalist among other things.

But lets talk about why I DO like it first.

So this theory is similar to a different situation that happened in limited life. When Joel famously said after Jimmy died 'I was going to sacrifice myself for him, so he wouldn't go out first.' Most people have taken that to mean 'I was going to give him my time/let him perma-kill me.'

What's interesting about this is Joel is going about it in a very productive way. He is gathering time from other players, which he will then give to Jimmy to further Jimmy's odds. It could technically also imply that Joel doesn't plan to die instantly. If he has enough time he can share with Jimmy without full sacrifice.

Joel never got a chance to do this. Making the words tragic and full of broken hope, especially considering how he was then hunted by the majority of the server. Soon dying near where Jimmy fell.

Martyn's actions would be tragic in a very very different way.

This isn't a man being productive. this is a man actively self destroying. looking the universe in the face as he chooses to beat it just seconds before it can kill it's favorite punching bag.

I can not begin to describe how much this feels like a man clawing victory out of a race only he knows he's participating in. (Only he knows hes Winning)

Martyn is not Helping Jimmy's case. He isn't somehow giving him more time on earth or showering him in diamond armor until he's safe. This is not a story where the victory will come sweet, this is one where the victory is death. Not more time with friends and family. Death.

I genuinely love imagining that. Full stop.

However, I don't think it's the Reasoning behind Martyn's actions. (at least partly)

Martyn is known partly for Rebellion. Or at least, THINKING about rebellion. (see, that's an important detail)

Character Martyn always planned on betraying Ren. Always. He was going to mutiny, coup, whatever you want to call it, from day one.

In Double life he doesn't live with his soulmate. Actively, killing them at one point. In Last life he begins talking to Them, beginning his journey into becoming a Listener agent.

In Limited life he actively disobeys the unspoken rules of conduct. (Which, to be clear, I do not think actually EXIST). He steals peoples kills, he acts amicable only to knife people in the back seconds later, he killed people that are supposed to be his allies. In a game where everyone was loyal he he betrayed his closest ally to win the game.

Now. Here's where the Thinking comes into play.

Martyn is never actually rebelling.

Not in any meaningful way at least. It's like the crab in the bucket example, he's pulling other crabs down to get to the mouth of the bucket (winning) and in doing so he Thinks he's rebelling. But he's actually just playing into the Death Game.

throughout this whole thing the ONLY thing he can do to rebel would have been to simply not play the game.

(Which is technically true from a Meta stand point as well)

Martyn could have let himself die. Could have refused to kill. In doing so he is causing the most active form of rebellion against the people Watching, in that he is giving them nothing to watch. He is refusing to PLAY the Death Game.

Now. He didn't chose to do that...

But what if he did THIS time?

Martyn has succeeded his goal, he's won. He is the fourth winner of the life series. And guess what?

It got him SHIT.

An hour and a half of abject loneliness in an abandoned war torn server, all while he slowly waited to die. And after? No escape. No nothing, just right back into the Game.

It's a little like the universe is laughing at him.

"Oh, you thought this would make you Special? You thought this would beet us? This is exactly what we always wanted"

So that one goal Martyn's had since the beginning? Gone. Out the window. And if THAT option is gone, there's really only one left:

I don't think Martyn is trying to die first to save Jimmy. I think Martyn is trying to die first to beet the Watchers/Universe.

(After all. What's a bigger fuck you than breaking the most solid curse in the game?)

[shootingstarrfish]

Hi I wanted to ask one of my fav obey me artists this question: Least favorite to favorite characters? If you wanna say why, that'd be cool. If anything! Please have a nice day!

hii there!!! dearest anon stop being so nice you're going to make me cry AHSHDHD thank you,,, <33333

but what a fun question! for anyone who doesn't want to read my stupid long explanation for each character i will leave this tierlist here! all tiers (except the first tier) are organised by most to least liked within the tier from left to right

no i dont hate lucifer, it's just facebook relationship status (aka complicated <3)

i have plenty of opinions though so i'll go ahead and give some explanations too!! >:D under the cut because there's a lot of rambling here LOL

some of the list is a bit boring because i cant really say i hate or even dislike any characters, and i don't wanna be mean about any characters just cause they're not necessarily my favourites so!

that being said lucifer pisses me off to a comical degree and he absolutely doesn't belong at the bottom but my feelings about him are so ridiculously complicated i don't know where else he belongs? i wish so badly that i could hate him in an uncomplicated way and move on but as an eldest sibling he's such a personal attack on me and i hate it. he's me, i'm him it's horrible. every time i start to think "ahh he's not that bad" he opens his mouth and makes me regret thinking that. i still think about the time i chose to kiss him on the ferris wheel and he held his hand out after and i took it and he said it reminded him of his dead sister, i will never stop holding it against him. he deserves to be loved and taken care of and he also should be thrown off a cliff. im quite certain if i had to assign myself a sin i would pick pride and i hate it >:( (this is all very lighthearted lol)

diavolo used to viscerally annoy me for no good reason when i first started the game, but over time he's grown on me and i'd say now i'm neutral-positive on him!! no idea why i hated him, i was just very salty for no reason hahaha i've recently come to appreciate his character a lot more, im very :( about how lonely he must be and i want him to have more genuine friends please solmare

i think mephisto really is just the kind of character i need to see more of to like, he's very interesting to read character analyses of (and kinda relatable tbh?) but i just need more in game is all! i love his silly lil poses those are real fun, and he is pretty

levi is another i also used to hate out of nowhere? i was neutral on him initially and then i suddenly hated him with a burning passion until one of my friends told me she really loved him and im physically incapable of hating a character my friends love so we're chill again HAHA slowly beginning to like him though! what a pathetic sopping wet cat of a man, it's GREAT

OUUGHH i so badly wanna be able to love beel more, it hurts me to have to put him here but unfortunately this is the way it is... i think it's more accurate to say i love the idea of beel? and ive noticed i really like him everywhere that isnt the game, which again is unfortunate :,)))

LUKE IS MY SON he is babyyyyyyy that's all i have to say <333 my precious lil sonboy he deserves the whole entire world

everyone loves mammon, and i am no exception :D he's not necessarily my type hence why he's neatly placed right in the middle but ugh i love a guy who tries and fails miserably to act tough but is super sweet inside, what a guy <3 ok i flip flopped between putting satan and simeon in the love tier because i am so very fond of both of them, but that's too many characters up there so imagine they're both in a weird tier purgatory between the 2 LOL

i am in fact going to marry simeon and then we will raise luke together it's a fact simeon is everything he's pretty and beautiful and a very complex and interesting character ahhh

SATAN MY LOVE he's a very interesting case to me in that i feel on paper he should be the kind of character who would be on the top of the list! he's smart and kind and unhinged and would kill for you and he likes cats!!! truly husband material i adore him

im going to marry thirteen, thanks for listening to my ted talk <3 my darling beautiful wife who would laugh hysterically if i fell down the stairs i love u thirteen <3333333 we will be wed tomorrow and we will live the dream in her silly lil cave of pranks and curses

i dont know what it is about raphael but i adore him??? is it the wet kitten swag? the done with life expression? his ridiculous outfit? i couldnt tell you but i saw him for the first time and i was immediately obsessed everything i learn about him just makes me more obsessed, i love the fact that he enjoys solomons cooking, the way he's good at sewing and is kind but kinda scary, what a fun character

i could talk endlessly about solomon oh how i love this silly househusband wizard guy i was pretty neutral on him in the og game, and then he swiftly stole my heart in nightbringer and now i would eat his terrible cooking any day of the week just to see him smile <3 if i die seeing him happy that's probably the best way to go out all his calls and messages are sooo cute and they make me melt im in love please just one chance...

barbatos and solomon are typically equal on the list i'd say? but the barbatos brainrot is hitting harder now so he gets to be ever so slightly higher this once hahaha barbs is another that took a while to grow on me, not that i ever disliked him or anything but i definitely overlooked him at first! design wise i absolutely LOVE him, his demon form is definitely one of my absolute favourites. the unique but still put together suit?? the ruffles?? the bone wing horns?? ugh he's just very pretty, and SO interesting as well love a calm collected guy who totally has the potential to destroy you if he so wishes but has a soft spot for you

and of course, real shocker im sure, at the tippy top of the list would be asmo and belphie my beloveds <333 i love them both equally and i could never put one above the other i actually started playing obey me for belphie because one of my favourite character tropes is The Tired One TM, and im absolutely not immune to a cute emo boy either. i've grown to really love his sass and the way he hides his manipulative nature behind his sweet and innocent appearance hehe i also do love how ridiculously forward and blunt he is at times, what a silly guy while belphie was very predictable, asmo was a very out of nowhere character for me! i distinctly remember seeing him initially and thinking "avatar of lust?? i guess he's pretty but he'll probably just be the fuckboy character who makes nonstop innuendos and has no character beyond that, and i'm too asexual for this" so i avoided him a lot at first, but i'm very weak for how kind and gentle and charismatic he is, and the way he puts his all into everything and everyone <333 it didnt take long for me to realise that he's almost exactly the kind of person i aspire to be more like

also miura ayme gives me so much gender envy its not fair send tweet

[ozimaniac]

[A Character Analysis of Zen]

Now that we have Zen’s birthday date and know that his zodiac sign is cancer, I just want to look at some characteristics. (Because I’m guessing that these dates were picked for a reason and not just random.) I Also want to talk about his past and why he is so avoidant about it. Even if I just end up pointlessly rambling about it, with no clear conclusion, because we just don’t know yet.

I will now infodump. A lot.

So a main characteristic of cancers is that they are closed off or seem distant at first. Cancers hold back on revealing their thoughts, therefore they come off as mysterious and not easy to approach. They also try to avoid confrontation. They retreat into their “shells” if they are uncomfortable and they like to brood.

Nonetheless they are very caring and protective about their family and friends. They might put the comfort of others before their own. They have the tendency to be self-sacrificing.

I think this description fits Zen well. His character seems calm and at peace with himself at first, but slowly you realise that there are underlying insecurities and you don’t really know what he is thinking. Ow2 actually gave us some voice lines that make it more clear that he isn’t a perfect individual, that reached complete inner peace. He has struggles of his own.

I also saw “dislikes revealing of personal life”, which is really accurate. He has always been really mysterious, especially about his past. This is noticeable in the interaction with Rein and Genji, where Rein asks him “What did you do? You know, before the Crisis?” And he will give different responses, that are kind of short, silly or underwhelming, and it’s implied that he isn’t telling the entire truth. Let me list the following responses:

“I served coffee.”

“I collected payments at a laser tag arena.”

“I was a lifeguard at a water park.”

“I drove a tractor.”

These are pretty ordinary jobs, and I don’t doubt that he worked these jobs. (Except for the lifeguard one maybe, he doesn’t look very waterproof.) So I don’t think that he is lying.. but that doesn’t mean that he isn’t hiding something.

There is also a line, that I think has been cut out of the game, because I only found it in one video.

“I massaged sheep on a free range pasture.”

(Now that’s a dream job. But seriously.. I almost thought I went insane and made it up, because it was really hard to find.)

Then Rein asks “Is that true?” and Genji says “He won’t tell me either.” (Ram also says something similar.) So although he has a close relationship with Genji, he still won’t reveal what happened in his past. And this obviously makes me think that something bad happened, and that he is uncomfortable talking about it.

He also has a line that goes “My memories before the awakening are blurry, but I do remember some things.” and he doesn’t elaborate further.

It could be that he legitimately doesn’t remember a lot before the awakening, and this makes him feel really insecure. Gaining sentience as an omnics and trying to uncover those memories from the past, is probably like thinking about your first memories when you were a child. You might only remember snippets, and you might not be able to recall memories from a certain age. It could also be that some trauma has caused him to repress certain memories about his past and he feels subconsciously uncomfortable about it, which leads to avoidant behaviour, which might be his coping mechanism. Or he does remember his trauma and he is purposefully avoiding it, to not make the people around him uncomfortable or bring the mood down.

Zen’s current self is introverted, wise and sometimes witty. He went through a journey of self healing to get where he is now. So if I had to imagine what he used to be like in the past, then I’m picturing a quiet, oblivious and maybe anxious character. In the story with Symmetra he said that he used to have difficulty understanding certain phrases, which has some parallels to an autistic experience, like Symmetra’s.

His insecurities also shine through in some other voice lines. Like when he talks about his favourite animal, ants. He says “I envy ants for their clarity of purpose.” Although Zen seems quite accomplished, he still lacks purpose in his own eyes. There is also an interaction with Zarya where she asks if he dreams, and Zen answers with “I dream of peace. And, sometimes, falling.” Falling in dreams represents a lack of control over a situation or your life. Also feelings of anxiety or helplessness. 

Tw: trauma and bullying.

Ok so, what was his past like before the crisis.

First I want to look at Zen’s model. He is just an average, humanoid looking omnic. What we saw from Genesis, is that omnics like him were created for various odd jobs. We saw them being cooks or caretakers or servants.

And it’s not hard to imagine that those omnics faced a lot of mistreatment if they made mistakes. It would have been easy for humans to blame omnics and just treat them like objects, and bully them verbally or physically.

If you get bullied early on in your life, it’s likely that this will affect you throughout your life. So even if Zen wasn’t “awakened” yet, he still states that he remembers some things, and that mistreatment could explain his current, closed off self. When he is approached or asked things, he doesn’t say a lot and that could be learned behaviour, and a self defense mechanism. He also uses a lot of wisdoms and phrases that might seem impersonal, at least to strangers. (This could also be a masking behaviour.)

I can also imagine that omnics worked isolating jobs, which humans might avoid. (I’m picturing working in a closed off small space with repetitive tasks or no social interactions. Maybe a factory setting.) And this kind of job could get really lonely and boring. Once again, this could have led him to be more closed off, if he worked in that kind of environment.

Why would he keep this a secret though? Well, maybe it’s just not worth talking about. Sometimes the truth is boring, and the biggest fear is to disappoint. (This is less likely though, because he seems very intent to not tell anyone the details. So it’s probably something more serious that happened, like I mentioned before.)

Instead of being a victim, could Zen have been the aggressor? I think that’s unlikely, because it’s about his past before the crisis. Before the awakening. Most likely he did as he was told, because he didn’t have that level of autonomy yet. This also means that people were able to easily take advantage of him. If people mistreated him, then he had to just accept that, because that was his programming. Also I just don’t see Zen as being aggressive.

Well, anyway that was it!

I got sidetracked a lot on other thoughts, but I wanted to write about Zen’s past for a long time. His zodiac sign just gave me some confirmation about what I was initially thinking.

[california-112]

For the ask game:

If you were a character, who would you be and why?

Very unpopular opinions? Share them here!

Have fun:)

Hi, hello! Thanks for the ask!

This is the list they're from, and I'm still (always!) open to more :)

If you were a character, who would you be and why?

Mulder. Next question...

No, I'll elaborate. For my first reason, I'll quote my own post:

"Imagine. Going through your whole life looking like that." Yeah I can imagine going through my whole life looking like Fox Mulder, it's called gender eurphoria

I spelt euphoria wrong waaah

Apart from the looks, though, he seems to have a pretty cool life. UFO hunting, investigating the supernatural, cool apartment, great partner, fun basement office, action and adventure...of course, there are downsides (missing sister, constant brushes with danger, frequently hunted by the government, paperwork, etc.), but overall it looks very interesting.

However, we're also already not dissimilar. I may not be quite as much of a conspiracy nut as he is (though of course I believe in aliens 🛸), and I'm certainly not about to join the FBI even if the 'uniform' does look hella cool, but we apparently both have issues with sleeping, eating, trust, fire, and obsession/hyperfixation (e.g. Grotesque and his whole search for the Truth), at least. [Let me know if you think my assessment of his character (and/or mine?!) is unfair or wrong; I can't remember exactly what's in canon and what appears more in fanon.]

The most random similarity is that both of us have used the sound of a light aircraft to locate something. In Mulder's case, during S01E15 'Lazarus', it's a sound caught on a recording that helps him find Scully. For me, I was hiking with a group a few years ago and we were mildly lost. However, when I heard a light aeroplane doing spin training, I knew that it could only being doing that over certain areas in our locality, and from the map we had I could work out our location more accurately, the result being that we made it home that evening.

I can also blame Mulder for my new sunflower seed addiction! Thanks a bunch.

Of course, if I were actually to turn up in a TXF episode, it would probably be as background character #3 who has a couple of lines being questioned by Scully whilst Mulder waits moodily in the background, but hey. I want to believe.

Very unpopular opinions? Share them here!

Look, this show may be a new love of mine, but yes, I do already have some potentially unpopular opinions. Buckle in...

I'm not a fan of MSR. You said unpopular! I've really enjoyed the early seasons of the show for the friendship between Mulder and Scully, and I see that as just continuing. Yes, they get closer, how could they not? But I dislike the fact that they (apparently) actually get together in the end and it's canon.

I will add the disclaimer that, yes, I am only up to S05E09 at the moment, and I suppose that the storyline could lead very nicely into it. However, at the moment from what I've seen in content on here like gifsets and edits, I don't think I'll like it, and I prefer the vibe of the show as it now is.

This marries up (!) with my dislike of many of later parts of the mytharc that I'm coming to now. It's probably because I personally prefer monster of the week episodes, but especially the S4 mytharc eps were among my least favourites, and some of them were bordering on a struggle to watch.

Which leads into my general dislike of S4, definitely an unpopular opinion according to the poll that happened recently. I won't go on too much as I've said this in some tags before, but I find it hard to believe that S4 is a favourite season. Yes, there are some good eps! Demons is my favourite of the season and among my top episodes of the show so far, and Tempus Fugit/Max was excellent. But there was also The Field Where I Died, Never Again, Memento Mori, Synchrony, Zero Sum...some of my least favourite episodes so far, that I would probably avoid on a rewatch.

Ok, rant over. Thank you for this ask, it was great fun to think about the answers! :D

[bonetrousled]

can you talk about why you disliked undertale yellow? never played it or watched a playthrough but i’m very curious!

PREFACING THIS WITH A DISCLAIMER i know it is a passion project and it makes me Feel Bad that my feelings on it r this negative. i do not mean to discredit the years of work anybody put into it and i am So Happy that the general consensus is that people really liked it! i'm glad the team's work paid off. i am also going to be SUPER opinionated. undertale is my biggest interest of all time it has been my special interest for going on Nine Years . i am Wired to have very strong feelings on it . please do NOT take my opinion as a message to Not enjoy it if you do! play it and form an opinion on ur own time

also SPOILERS for the game!

that being said

i will first state the things i Enjoyed

music was phenomenal! it was very fun and atmospheric

artwork was very good! it makes me a little sad that the canon characters we see didn't really get the tlc/polish that all of the original content did, but that's ok!

i like how smarmy flowey was in the no mercy run. it was a little ooc at times but i had a blast (which will sadly become a negative) partly bc of his attitude

i love mo as a character. im going to rescue him from this game i just know it

ok. things that frustrate me from least to most (i will try to keep this brief bc i WILL go on a tangent if left unrestrained)

i wish the main cast had more variety in monster types. body shape, proportions, colors, etc! with how wide the array of the cast is in ut, it's just a little sad that the main cast here all roughly have the same build, height, and aren't really "monstery". lots of the non-main characters (i am including the feisty five in here) have more diverse and visually interesting designs to me and i wish there was just a bit more variety

add-on to the previous point: something abt the fact that dalv just kind of looks like a human Guy who is Purple with Horns makes me irrationally irritated. they could have put a little more of a bat motif in there or Something because the first time i saw him i genuinely didn't think he was supposed to be a monster

some of the fights are NONSENSE BULLSHIT HARD for no reason. some of these have been fixed since release but there were multiple segments that weren't even like. main story character fights that made me want to rip my hair out. additionally the shops are FEW and FAR between. it was a STRUGGLE to get enough healing items 90% of the time and i had to ration them out constantly

i know most were patched out and this is kind of a nitpick but the complete ABUNDANCE of grammatical and spelling errors on release took me out of the flow of things SO much. places that desperately needed a comma that had none, words completely misspelled (outside of punchlines for jokes), things like that. it wouldn't have been such a problem but it happened SO much and really got into the way of making sure dialogue progressed as normal. speaking of

i'm so sorry. half of the dialogue and jokes make me want to shriek and scream in agony. maybe it's just not my cup of tea and nobody is forcing you to have completely toby-fox-accurate jokes in your game but the majority of the jokes made in the pacifist/neutral runs fall completely flat for me. the general dialogue is very fanfic-esque to me in a way ? i do Not know how to describe it. it's not Good. along w that i'm sorry but in my opinion the way they wrote asgore in there is COMPLETELY out of character. i'm going to be so so honest mr king "fuzzy pushover" fluffybuns isn't going to go GET OUT OF MY SIGHT AND NEVER RETURN!!!!! the man got beat up by a child and took her in to train her. like yeah his garden is sentimental or whatever but like. he is such a Nice Guy. he would Not do that

the timeline does not make Any sense. if frisk is the first human to fall in YEARS to the point where everyone is losing hope of ever getting another soul for the barrier and most monsters don't recognize you as a human and let you interact w them freely why in the Fuck are undyne and alphys just like. alive and kicking here. why is alphys doing amalgamate shit already. what is going ON

and finally. the part that makes me the Most Irritated

i cannot fucking stand the story. I AM SORRY

i physically cannot expound on this as much as i want to bc the post is long enough as it is and i'll go on forever but generally speaking

i Do Not Like ceroba. i didn't really feel any connection or anything to any of the other characters in General but her entire deal and everything that surrounds it just makes me So Mad. like ok. i tried to get past the "oh my husband is a super important scientist (but not the royal scientist because that's alphys teehee but still REALLY important) and he's also secretly a boss monster (even though the only boss monsters we see are the Actual Fucking King and Queen of monsters and are the same monster subtype)" shit but like. THEN it's like. oh he's actually making a super secret magic serum that uses essence from a boss monster soul and a human soul (where did he get that. he made this after he was fired from his job. where did he get a human soul from) to give EVERY monster the power of a boss monster so that when we EVENTUALLY get enough souls to get to the surface (could literally be hundreds of years from now) we'll be strong enough to beat the humans (that's why asgore is collecting the souls in the first place. to shatter the barrier and become a god strong enough to beat the humans. that's the Point)

but WUH OH!!!! the serum is actually KILLING him!!!! and he never told his wife! so he leaves a series of tapes behind to tell her abt it after he dies and IN THESE TAPES he's like listen. here's this awesome potion im making. you need a BOSS MONSTER SOUL and a HUMAN SOUL to make it work. our daughter IS a boss monster. BUT. do NOT FUCKING use it on her. ok. DON'T. do that. ok love you (dies) AND FUCKING. her like 6 year old daughter walks in and speaks in a perfect eloquent sentence and says some shit like "we have to carry on daddy's legacy :(" and asks to be injected w the shit that we saw kill her dad SECONDS PRIOR and ceroba is virtually IMMEDIATELY like well ok if the kindergartner says it's fine. AND OF COURSE HER DAUGHTER IMMEDIATELY FALLS DOWN????

and when i tell u the like. WHOLE second half of the game is dedicated to this bullshit nonsense. ceroba has this whole thing where she's trying to kill you because you're pure of heart or whatever and it'll work for the serum or something and after a LONG ASS (stupid incredibly hard for no reason considering SHE IS NOT a boss monster) battle w her she's like ok i'm not gonna do that anymore i give up kill me etc. and in pacifist you're like nah i won't kill u i forgive you Hooray!

and so. right. youve been fighting the ENTIRE TIME. to find the missing kids. to get home. to leave the underground after figuring out what happened. there are only FIVE human souls at this point. having one more will NOT break the barrier. you've been fighting to LIVE this Entire Time. the story must end in clover's death SOMEHOW but literally the driving force here has been survival

clover is literally like ummmm ok well im gonna give up my soul right here right now to add it to the pile. *dies on rooftop ALONE* . the shriek i screamed when this happened was. Astronomical. like. oh yeah everybody let the 9 year old give their life for a civilization that has been trying to kill them this Entire Time. never mind the fact it makes all of the fighting and striving and grueling we did Worthless because clover decides to sacrifice themselves completely out of the player's control. this wouldn't make me AS mad if we had like. a choice like the forgive him/do not asriel thing where we could face asgore and be forced to lose OR sacrifice ourselves but even then it's just. SO silly to me.

i think i get the like. doomed parents sad child dreemurr parallels they were TRYING to go for but it is all so clunky and wonky and. just DOES not work narratively if you think about ANY aspect of it for too long

all of these factors combined made the game a complete and total Slog to get through . it is Not just me i streamed it to a few friends the whole time and the opinion was the Same

HOWEVER.

the no mercy run, completely against what it is MADE to do, was fucking awesome

the passive aggressive comments from flowey the entire time were hilarious. the power trip i got chasing axis was splendid. i didn't have to sit through pages of dialogue that made my eye twitch. i just got to Kill People.

i do Not like the fact that they seemed to think no mercy = Hard Bosses which. isn't really true for undertale ? out of the normal bosses only two are ramped up in difficulty and it thematically makes sense Why. in uty martlet gets multiple fights (including a Bullshit Insane Hard Final Fight), ceroba gets a Bullshit Insane Hard fight w a new mechanic that is introduced out of Nowhere and took me like 6 times to notice that it was even Implemented, and axis gets a tough fight. which is Fine but i do not think it really understood the message of like. the no mercy run is not supposed to be Fun. you are eviscerating this world and everything it has to offer. you're literally Killing the game. it's a tricky thing to balance but all in all No part of it made me feel bad. this could be due to me Already not really caring abt any of the characters but. sigh

also martlet gets really strong at the end bc she injects herself w dt but like. why does she know about that. she does guard stuff Near the Lab but why does she Know about the experiments. the whole point is that nobody Else Knows. where did she get that from. what the fuck

anyway. says that i won't go on for too long. proceeds to go on for too long like some kind of Liar

[singeryuri]

hihiii nikolai >_0 if ur still doing the s/i game how abt 🌩️✨📚 !! pick anyone u wanna dooo :3

referencing this ask game!

YAYYY thank you yves :3 I am indeed still accepting asks for it since I ♡ excuses to ramble muahaha >:3 decided to go with dmitrie and éloise for the first 2, but for 📚 I took into account all my s/is and wrote as much as I could think of atm! under the cut bc rambling wahoo ^_^

🌩️ ; Do any canon characters hate your S/I? Who's their worst enemy?

Dmitrie: He gets on Rikai's nerves sooo much it is so funny oh my goodness. With his obnoxious flirting towards Amahiko, and him trying to 'ship' the rest of the charismas he gets yelled at a lot (reasonably so bc what is this man's problem!1!1!1) for acting like a weirdo. I need to put them in a locked room with security cameras together and watch what happens..

Éloise: Her dislike of Mozus is mainly something that rubbed off on her from Divus, but it'd still definitely be there without him around. She considers him a pain to talk to for long and feels as though he's a strict, boring old guy. If she had to choose, she much prefers standing off to the side giggling as she watches Divus and him bicker.

✨ ; What are some of your S/Is favorite things, aside from your F/O?

Dmitrie: He eats UP badly written romance, could live off of a steady supply of YA fiction instead of food for about a month or two. He also has a bit of a sweet tooth, and enjoys cherry and strawberry flavored things. His favorite color is red, the color of love, but he's also a fan of pink and white, since they're other colors commonly associated with love. He also loves stuff with tacky heart motifs. Valentine's Day and the days leading up to it are like the "Objective: Survive" time of the year for his wallet.

Éloise: She loooves things with berries, especially blueberries! I imagine she always has some blueberry tea in her house because it's her favorite kind, and indulges on blueberry tarts once in a while when she needs to satisfy her sweet tooth. In terms of music, she likes classier stuff, usually listening to orchestral music while she works or relaxes. She wears a lot of green and works with nature, so me saying she likes it isn't anything special, but she also has a fondness for orange and I think she'd really like amber jewelry :] Anddd finally, one of her favorite flowers is a sunflower 🌻! I'd have to google a bunch of flowers to accurately list off what she likes since she probably knows ten times more types off hand than I do but those I do know about. So yay!

📚 ; Do you think any of your S/Is from different media would get along well?

Ohh absolutely!! Martha being the gothic girl she is would looove being around Rina, and be so curious about her whole.. haunted doll thing. I think Rina and Odette could also be doll friends and bond over doll things. Jarek and Dmitrie would at least get along decently because I think they'd be able to bond over The Longing™ together, but this is assuming Dmitrie doesn't start being really weird. As all the crsm characters are known to be. But even then I think Jarek wouldn't mind much like c'mon he's in love with King Yaoi III who knows maybe being Like That is just how Dmitrie copes with being in love with whoever this Amahiko guy is 🤷 Dorenia is a friendly fella so he'd generally be pretty ok with most of my other S/Is I think. Aven and them feel like they'd get along well but I think that's because they're some of the most Nikolai-truthful characters in terms of personality so I think that's just them being similar people,, Interesting question hehe this was really funny to think about!

[delta-orionis]

Tuesday again no problem 2/20/24

listening

I got into listening to the podcast The Worst of All Possible Worlds recently, and their episode on Neuromancer made me feel very validated.

They echoed the same sentiments that I feel: Neuromancer is a very strange book with a meandering, hard to follow plot, that can be weirdly racist and misogynistic at times. However, there’s a reason it’s regarded as a cyberpunk classic, and there are concepts and scenes from the book that are genuinely compelling; for this reason I can’t bring myself to fully hate the book. It wasn’t fun to read but I’m glad I read it.

The rest of this podcast is about whatever random media the hosts feel like talking about, and I’m kind of a sucker for shows where hosts just have genuine conversations about why they like or dislike a thing. This show has been filling that niche for me recently.

reading

I’m continuing to slowly work my way through Ancillary Justice. I’m still not very far into the book, but I’m already starting to become quite fond of the main character and her peculiar interest in music.

watching

I rewatched this video essay about Rain World’s lore the other day, because my brain continues to chew on the lore of this game and I kind of wanted a refresher on the bigger plot.

Some people have already pointed out that some of the points in this video aren’t 100% accurate to the lore, and I disagree with some of the conclusions it draws, but it does a good job of giving a general overview of the game’s story. I think if you’re interested in learning about Rain World’s lore, this is a good place to start (but be wary of spoilers).

playing

Mostly Rain World. I haven’t played much this past week, but I did find time to throw a singularity bomb at Five Pebbles, so that was fun.

making

Still working on my Five Pebbles plushie.

I started on his cloak. I still need to finish his arms and sew everything together. I put some wire in him so he will be poseable, but the wire keeps sticking through one of his legs so I might need to add some more stuffing there. Trial and error!

I also posted some Rain World worldbuilding ideas a few days ago. Nothing too complicated, just some brainstorming and sketches for a hypothetical creature.

…

This coming week will be extremely busy for me so I’m not sure if I’ll have much to report, but idk, I guess we’ll see.