#but like 3 hours in and my dads having a delusional about my birthday

[lilgynt]

i’m soooo talented i can cry about a fake birthday’s party almost a month after my birthday

[lastquincy]

thank you for the tag nini 💚 under the cut!

(questions bolded, answers italicized)

last song i heard:

worst is on it's way by korn, HEALTH, danny brown and meechy darko! my friend showed me a song by HEALTH earlier and before this i had no idea they existed, so i went through their discography and found this collab and immediately fell in love. i love you rap and rock you belong together

favorite color:

it varies but one of these is usually good

last watched series:

i don't really watch series, or at least i haven't lately, but i did watch lars and the real girl for the first time a few days ago! i can confidently say that is one of the most terrifying ways i have ever related to a movie, and it is both exhilarating and nauseating. definitely recommend to anyone ever, especially if you are autistic or delusional/dissociative. it's almost painfully sympathetic and i haven't seen many, if any, movies that actually care about a delusional character the way this one does.

sweet/spicy/savory:

sweet and savory kissing sloppy style. i like spice a lot too, though! it's a very close tier list. depending on my mood it's either sweet or savory at the top but i'm picky with the style of spice i like so she gets last place. sorry...

relationship status:

i dunno @determine can you help me by holding my hand and telling me you love me so i can figure out my complicated feelings culminating in a heartwarming coming of age story about aro fag love and sex in a modern society that doesnt yet understand atypical relationships starring ryan reynolds played by melly (she drives)

[jokes aside, taken 👍]

last thing i googled:

i don't save my search history on my phone browser but it was probably either something on e621 or the weather. because i am always checking the weather

current obsession:

i'm somewhat between things right now but undertale is a strong contender. replayed all the main routes recently and i feel like if i think too hard about flowey i might cause an event. honestly an event has already been caused. sorry. In 12 hours it might be walten files though

last thing i read:

for christmas i got some fan guides for earthbound and mother 3 from fangamer (thank you dad!) and looking through those was really interesting. doesn't really count as a thing i read (especially since i mostly skimmed) but that's really all i can remember. unless you want to count one of my many, many rereads of any akira himekawa zelda manga and the dark horse zelda compendium things (i keep reviewing how they categorize the timelines and examining the list of all items and their differing appearances in different games).

something i've been looking forward to:

this summer i get to spend a whole month with the love of my life and my friends! we're going to go to a concert (los campesinos!) and it will be my first time at a concert ever, we're going to anthrocon (not my first time, but my second! i feel much more prepared for the situation..) and my birthday! we'll have plenty of time to hang out and chill and do whatever and i'm just ecstatic to be back further up north and enjoy my youth. i get to eat at sheetz again!

TAG: @determine @mellyncholly if you guys want to do this! also anyone reading this (hi) you are also tagged if you want to be. everyone loves filling out forms with personal info! yay sharing!

[juliamaximoff]

જ⁀➴ about me (if u even care) !

júlia but you can call me juju or lia! (there's julinha too, it's like in the diminutive, like patootie you know?)

18 years old, she/her, brazilian 🇧🇷, scorpio, birthday in november 2nd (yes, in the day of the dead lol), infp-t, i'm 5'5".

♬ — favorite song of the moment (i'm addicted): slim pickins by sabrina carpenter.

hobbies — play video games, sleeping (it counts?😭), writing (only fanfics), editing images (usually for fanfics/fandoms), drawing (i'm very good at it but stopped doing that months ago, i lost the motivation), dancing, roller skating.

artists & actors — bts, evan peters (really? you don't say), pedro pascal, james mcavoy, tom hiddleston, neil newbon, weeekly, bibi.

movies & series — brave, coraline, good omens, grinch (2000), hairspray, mamma mia (2008), httyd 2 (i love all the movies), helluva boss, moon knight, neko no ongaeshi, princess and the frog, rise of the guardians, rush hour 1 & 2, spy x family, steven universe (all), thor 3, wandavision, zootopia.

video games — minecraft, roblox, amour sucré, the sims 3/4/2, stardew valley, bayonetta 1 & 2 (i still didn't played the 3rd one and i refuse to watch gameplays about it!), baldur's gate 3, ori and the will of the wisps, overwatch 2, league of legends, honkai: star rail, tomb raider (2013).

fave characters (in general) — peter/pietro maximoff (quicksilver), wanda maximoff, loki, deadpool, spider-man (tom holland's is my fave), aziraphale, stolas, astarion, garnet, jing yuan.

fandoms (that i still in) — bts, evan peters, pedro pascal, marvel movies and series (i didn't read the hqs, so i think would be cool to explain), honkai: star rail.

if you want to know more about me, don't hesitate to jump in my inbox to chat!this could make my day! 👋✨️

›› random facts/info under the cut.

random facts/info — 01. actually i'm learning english beig self-taught! since kid i play video games and needed to use the google translator to talk to people or understand the games, it turns out i naturally keep memorising every word. so then being a teenager and interacting with fandoms, fanfics and music... it just got better. so now i am just risking it typing (sometimes i use the google translator ngl. but have times that i type an entire paragraph without any mistakes!!! 🥰) aaand rightnow i can watch movies and videos without dubbing, but sometimes i still need english subtitles to compreheend some words.

02. i went with my mother to the BTS concert on may 25 in 2019, when they returned to brazil after 3 years, it seems silly but it was very difficult for a big k-pop group to step foot in a stadium here in brazil at that time. i consider that one of the best days of my life. ♡

03. my mom took my dad and i to ccxp 2022 in december 2nd, and only later did i find out that the day after we went (december 3rd), pedro pascal was there, in my country and state, in the comic con... this was shortly before i started being a fan of his. 🥲 it's not a super cool fact maybe, but i like to remember and laugh about it a little because i see how only destiny (and money, obviously) didn't let this happen😭 (i'm delusional, you don't say)

[jae-canikeepyou]

| adjacent | j.jh

pair: jaehyun x fem!reader

word count: 18k+ (unedited & not proof read)

summary: jaehyun turns into a golden retriever whenever the day reaches the most beautiful time; golden hour. a secret he kept his entire life & always wonders how long he could keep it, especially when you suddenly showed up.

genre: au + golden retriever!jaehyun + hs!nct

a/n: idk what came to me as i brainstormed this but by now, nctzens and valentines should know jaehyun’s a golden retriever :3 so i decided to write a plot for this adorable fact T^T heavily inspired with fruits basket and beauty & the beast! i really hope you’ll like it. lmk what you think! enjoy reading lovelies! ~j

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time was ticking real quick.

he rushed through the bustling people, avoiding the narrow crowds and jay-walked countless pedestrian crossings. he needed to hide. no one should see him transform. there was little time left. why was he so careless each time this happened? his parents and younger brother warned him to be alert at all times. did he listen? no, never did. they compared him to a rock— hard headed and stubborn. but all he ever wanted was to be free.

curses! just a little more, a few metres more! he pant as he tried to catch air. he felt his flesh tingling, his senses doubling and tripling. jaehyun peddled as fast as he could, at least reach the line of bushes by the basketball court. hopping over the plants, he threw his bag aside and jumped off his bike before bracing for the fall.

the now broken bell sounded horrible as jaehyun’s brother caught up to him with his skateboard. “dad’s gonna kill you if you ask for another bike for your birthday.” he sighed looking at the loosened chain while picking up the single-track vehicle and the scattered clothes.

jaehyun transformed to a golden retriever puppy and struggled to come out of the bushes with his tiny paws and body. when he succeeded, he scratched the back of his ears to brush off the leaves stuck to them. “won’t happen, sungchan. i’ve already saved up enough by then. i’m not gonna burden dad for my wants.”

sungchan pressed the bridge of his nose. “you’re kinda being a burden now.” he picked the animal— his brother— up and put him inside his coat, as well as the belongings on the ground. he hopped on the bike and headed towards jaehyun’s campus.

“what did you say?” jaehyun barked tried opening the zipper from the inside of sungchan’s coat.

“nothing.” the younger excused. “but can i have your bike if you actually plan to get a new one?”

“ugh just bring me to the court. i’ll be late for my morning practice.”

the brothers were able to communicate telepathically as they’re related and were both cursed. instead of golden hour, sungchan transforms during the blue hour, which occured at twilight. tracing back to their ancestors, all were cursed for unknown inexplainable circumstances. they tried breaking it with all they could. every idea ended a failure. so they had to live through it, adjust, adapt and be alert.

they bumped into ten, kun and jungwoo, who were doing warm-ups and they simultaneously trailed their eyes and heads towards the jung brothers. seeing the huge pouch on sungchan’s stomach area, they all cracked up and checked the time. “oh yeah, it’s sunrise.” jungwoo spun the ball on his pointer finger.

ten grabbed the pup with one hand and jaehyun barked at him but he couldn’t understand a thing. although he was confused, he continued to carry him in his palm because jaehyun’s response was funny. “what is he trying to say?” he chuckled and poked the pup’s snout.

“he said ‘it hurts. put me down idiot’. i have to be honest with you hyung. holding us by the back of the neck really hurts.” unlike his brother, he was rather calm and collected despite already imagining the pain.

“you’re a blue holland lop bunny. it’s normal to carry you like this too right?” ten showed the pup to sungchan.

kun facepalmed at the question and took jaehyun. “no dimwit it’s not normal. sorry jae. you know he just likes teasing your puppy form.”

“‘wait until i turn back’- ugh seriously do i really have to translate hyung’s words every time?” sungchan gave jaehyun’s clothes and bike to jungwoo. “you know what to do when he transforms back yeah?”

they nodded and upon seeing the kid leave and headed towards his campus, jaehyun couldn’t wait to turn human. he would always beat ten up almost immediately— sometimes forgetting that he was naked. for the dudes it was alright. the problem was if he was with girls, though he hasn’t encountered anyone so far. he hoped he didn’t have to.

the harsh drills from basketball practice already sucked the energy out of jaehyun. not only that it was physically tiring, transforming into a dog twice a day before that have doubled the strain. then him transforming back would cause migraines and painful joints, as they were the aftermath of the curse. he had to keep his title of m.v.p and captain since the told them there was a possibility of him of having a scholarship for college. he couldn’t let a minor pain hinder that chance. not ever.

however, ten and the others could read his suffering. to them it was obvious through his exhales and slowing speed. hiding it was of no use. jungwoo ruffled his hair with a clean towel after shower. “can’t you just be like that dog in the movie ‘up’? have a collar that translates barks into actual language?”

jaehyun rolled his eyes and wore his black t-shirt. “it’s a damn movie, jungwoo. the world might’ve evolved and advanced in technology and even if they were to exist they’d be expensive. can’t afford that.”

“you sound negative, don’t you have any hope at all?” kun joined the conversation.

“never had any. stopping this curse is impossible. it’s been generations. my dad’s still suffering too. i have to find a way.” he fixed his black cap in front of a mirror.

but he knew there wasn’t. silence loomed above them as the team struggled to continue the topic. they tried not to bring it up yet each time they did, it always ended awkwardly and badly. it was either they riled jaehyun’s mood— mostly ten— or jaehyun himself was building his own raincloud by sulking about it and not looking at the bright side.

how ironic it was, he thought. generally speaking, even though being golden had good intentions and the breed was meant to bring happiness to others, he felt the total opposite. if he had to describe it, it was all insecurity, lowered his self-esteem and hopelessness only increased over the years as he grew.

thinking about it, he slammed the locker a little too hard that its components caused it to bounce back.. and also added to fuel of his anger. “break that again you’ll be in the coach’s office.” kun tied his shoelaces and the others agreed.

“my dad is the coach, what do you mean?” he questioned at the stupidity.

“you didn’t show up the last time it broke. we got the punished in your stead. uncle wasn’t happy.” ten got out of the showers last, a towel was wrapped around his waist before the younger ones were scarred for a second.

“it was sunset and i transformed! of all people dad’s supposed to understand! i-” jaehyun rubbed his face quite agressively and headed straight outside.

“oi i’m still changing! wait up!”

jaehyun kicked the bike’s stand attached to the rear wheel. he and his father didn’t have the best relationship compared with other kids, but he could say that it was better than the relationship he had with his mother. she loved her little family, yet over time the curse grew onto her. her husband would turn into a werewolf at full moon. and until now, even though that happened once month, she thought a part of him wasn’t the same person she loved before. even more so, when her sons were just the same as him.

your mom’s delusional! she doesn’t love us! she fears us!

that feeling stayed in the boys’ mind until they were old and mature enough to comprehend the situation they’re in. why couldn’t she love them like any mom would? she was no different from an animal mother abandoning her calf/pup just because they were or had defects.

mr. jung tried his best to be the perfect father, for only he understood what his two sons were going through, as they might go through decades with it, just like he was. jaehyun still remembered his first transformation, he only had puppy paws, but that was a sign to mr. jung that he indeed inherited the curse. when sungchan grew a tail at a fine age of one, their father gave up his 9-5 hour office job to tend the boys. and that was before he became jaehyun’s basketball coach. now he could monitor them at a close range.

much to jaehyun’s dismay and for that reason, he felt more caged and overprotected.

—

“y/n! coach’s looking for you!” your classmate called.

no.. you groaned. again?..

it was already after school hours. you slouched on your desk as you covered your ears, remembering the errands he asked you to do previously. you didn’t know why, but ever since you had detention because you refused to run a 1600m marathon for an assessment, seemed like the other punishment was that he passed his job to you. that was a month ago, and today was the tenth time.

but curious as you were to find answers, you brushed it off and tried not to show any remorse. it’s all for conduct, you kept telling yourself. the whistle echoed the entire hallway and jolting you up in your seat. “okay, okay! hold on!” you yelled from the back of the classroom.

as coach jung stood rather comfortably outside the room, he gestured you to walk faster with a dimpled smile. “y/n! took you approximately three minutes to walk here.” he laughed and handed you several files and a zipper folder.

“thanks for counting?..” you replied with a confused and questioning tone. “coach, what’s this?”

“all school sports teams will have an annual retreat before their playoff seasons. i need a representing manager since ours was admitted to a hospital just today.” he pointed at the list. you followed his finger and it landed on your name.

“sounds like to me it’s more practice. and you want me to go because?” you raised your brows. he asked you to follow him to the gymnasium, in which it was making you recall all those extra detention after school.

“to make up with all of the p.e assessments you ‘purposely’ missed.” he said proudly while looking at his team doing drills. but he didn’t get any response from you. when he looked on his side, you were gone and ran across the basketball gym. “y/f/n!”

you squealed as embarrassment crawled your entire body. not only were you escaping from coach, you were disrupting the team’s practice and hitting couple of duffel bags and water bottles. “ah! sorry! coming through!”

*whistles* “after her!” coach jung’s voice added an extra chill to your spine.

“ugh why us?” ten groaned with sore muscles as coach gestured to them widely.

“just go.” kun panted.

then you heard a several footsteps turn into drums until they sounded a stampede. you jumped on your toes as you passed the line of showers cubicles. good thing you haven’t seen a naked man, or else you’d faint without knowing. you turned around and went straight ahead then to your right, and hid in a random room. the echoing voices and squeaking friction between shoes and waxed floors were cut to a silence, like your ears were muffled instantly.

your wobbly legs were tired and you were sighing in exhaustion and crouched down against the door. great, i’ll stay out of their sight- “what are you doing here?” you heard a low voice and froze on the spot. “only members of the basketball team can access the meeting room.”

that sounded like the captain.

“did you hear what i just said?” he raised his brows. you slowly lifted your eyes from his shoes to his legs, then to his built and face. “well if you’re a nobody you might as well leave before coach arrives. you interrupted my recording-”

“i heard you jung jaehyun.” you tsked and realised you had the name list on your hand. “ah, as a matter of fact, i can be here because i am part of the team. my name’s on the list.” you grabbed a pen and ticked the empty box on the paper.

what are you saying, stupid?!

“uh-huh..” jaehyun trailed, putting down his camera.

“y-yeah!” you stuttered. “you heard me.”

the door shook by the loud knocks from the other side. on the frosted window, you could see four figures. orange and black jerseys, they must be the team members. “ah! the door’s locked! she’s definitely in here coach!” one said.

“i’ll toss you the keys!” he yelled. oh crap. you were caught in between. your heart patterned with the knocks.

“you look terrified after hearing coach, y/n.” the chair squeaked from the weight. “i’m guessing you’re that troublesome student he has a hard time dealing with recently?”

of course captain knows you. great reputation you have, y/n.

“so? what’s your point?” you stood up to see his amused grin.

“say hello to a term’s detention.” jaehyun waved as the door swung open, revealing ten, kun, jungwoo and.. the coach.

you sighed heavily and dropped the papers. the coach crossed his arms and you lowered your head a little. “you plan to escape again y/n? then i shouldn’t hear any excuses from you. you’ll join us for the twelve day retreat. period.” he picked the papers up and wrote something.

“sir i can’t be with a bunch of jocks for that long!” your whine had the captain blocking his ears. “i have debate finals to attend to.”

jaehyun flinched at the high pitched sound and rolled his eyes. what was your deal? it was rude of you to suddenly barge into athlete’s quarters but judging them for that was even more rude of you. he had to shut you up at some point.

“so much excuses.” he played with his nails and to you he looked more amused than ever. you rolled your eyes at his chuckle and know he would target you from now on. “dad, y/n told me she’s ‘part of the team’.” he played his video that recorded your voice, clearly saying what jaehyun heard.

coach jung looked rather surprised, but his smile definitely screamed happy. “oh? that’s all i needed to hear. welcome, uh- temporarily. i’ll inform mrs. park about the situation.”

nononono- “i did this.” you were at a loss for words. “i won’t be able to compete in the debate.”

“yeah pretty much you made the wrong decision.” jaehyun stood to tower over you. “i’d like to see you suffer our drills-”

four knocks cut jaehyun off. “oh no, she’ll only do those for two days.”

you swifted your head in confusion, seeing coach jung wrote down your schedule on the white board. you were packed and it’s a lot worse than the actual assessment planned in school. “and what about the rest of the ten days?!” you exasperated that your hairtie snapped at the right moment, and your hair fell in sightful way.

“ooh that was hot.” ten commented in soft whisper, causing kun and jungwoo nudge him on the each side.

“she’ll be our manager for the remaining days, keep track of our drills and score points, or other extra things i needed a hand with while taeyang’s in the hospital.”

jaehyun rested his palms on his waist, swirling his tongue inside with a provoking gaze at you. “see if you can keep up, manager.” he chuckled.

you checked the time, it was nearing 5 p.m. “you know what, give me a day to process all this sport thing. it’s close to evening and i have to get going-”

“it’s evening already?” jaehyun cut you off as he looked outside the window.

the sun glistening at the distance while the sky showed a pretty ombré of warm colours. his senses doubled again and his whole body ached. he had to make you leave. it was already enough that his friends knew about his situation. there’d only be more trouble if you knew too.

“uh duh? the clock’s right there.” you pointed.

“hm, anyway you have to leave now.”

“sheesh i was going to anyway.” you rolled your eyes, but felt jaehyun’s palms behind your back. “hey stop pushing!”

“you’re too slow!” his tone changed. different than the usual because panic was what you felt from his palms. “quickly!”

the rest of the boys could tell you were pissed. they couldn’t understand why jaehyun had to make a fuss out of it when all he had to do was to kindly ask you. using force would only cause misunderstandings, like what’s happening now. “hey what’s your deal?!” you flicked his arms. “do you like to push people around? just because i’ll be with the team for the next two weeks, that doesn’t mean you could treat me like this already!”

“tsk so noisy! you’re wasting time! just leave would you?!” jaehyun turned you around towards the door.

this time you wouldn’t budge. “no jung jaehyun i need an explanation with this stupid attitude of yours!” you wriggled off of his hold, pushing him back with pats several times more that he stepped backwards.

“i don’t owe you an explanation!”

“you definitely do?!”

“why can’t you listen to what i say?”

“why can’t you stop being pushy, pushy?”

“you’re the one pushing me! time’s ticking y/n!”

the continuous back and forth of bickers and the war of pushing each other was an idiotic sight. your wrist was in jaehyun’s palms as he gripped you tighter. “i don’t care captain jerk! it wouldn’t bother you or hurt you to just give me one reason- and he slammed the door at my face! argh!”

jaehyun smirked wide and proudly knowing that he ‘won’ argument. silencing you was better than letting you see his other form. the boys stared him once he turned around to face them. “what?” he questioned,

“definitely not the right way to treat a girl.” they all said simultaneously.

“you know how bad it makes me feel when you all said it at the same time?” jaehyun pressed the bridge of his nose.

he knew well enough that this wasn’t his usual self. he’s good friends with you despite being in different teams of the school. you both took literature as your electives. sometimes you’d let him copy your notes when he had matches or leave small appetisers and juice cartons when he was tired and vice versa.

but no matter how close you both were, he couldn’t afford to let you see his other self.

not just yet.

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waking up so early in the day to assist the team was way more annoying than birds chirping by your bedroom’s window. instead of hearing their tuneful tweets, you had to endure endless phone calls every minute. you couldn’t remember much from that day because you passed out. and the team didn’t look for you until yesterday.

coach jung waved to catch your attention, only to be greeted with your huge yawn and a disinterested face.

“ah there she is! c’mon now, i got the green light from mrs. park. she agreed that p.e is the only subject you’re likely to fail this semester, so she’s giving you a cool-off from the team and focus on here.”

“yep. heard you coach.” you tied up your hair, only listening to half of what he said. “where’s the captain?”

kun did few stretches & jumps, his expression mirrored the other two boys who were also doing the same. you had a feeling about this— their telepathic gaze and awkward silence. you took a basketball to pass it to ten. “is he still mad about me calling him a jerk? that was a few days ago and i didn’t expect him to be that sensitive.”

they laughed because they couldn’t deny his obvious trait. “he doesn’t show it but somehow you know he is.” ten passed the ball back to you. “but not this morning y/n. he’s late for.. another reason.”

you hopped to catch it yet you were a second late, and groaned as you had to run far to retrieve it. “uh-huh. nature calls in the morning, again?” you yelled.

“do you think she knows about jaehyun?” jungwoo asked the older ones. they eyed you rummaging in the bushes for the ball, later looking back at each other for answers, but no one knew how your mind worked. “it’s been five days and no word from her at all.”

“if she actually does, i guess she just doesn’t want to be involved? i think we can trust her for that.” kun drank from his bottle.

ten didn’t look convinced. “involved or not, we have to make sure she doesn’t tell anyone about jaehyun’s curse. keep an eye on her-”

“ah!” they heard your squeals and ruffles from the bushes. “guys look what i found!”

kun sighed when they saw you running back with a golden retriever puppy in your arms, taking back his words said earlier.

“uh-oh. that scream means she has no clue at all.” jungwoo brushed his hair up.

“this puppy is so cute! i wonder what it’s doing here? are you lost?” you hugged and sniffed into its fur and gosh it smelled like vanilla shampoo. there was a metal collar around its neck, the piece spelled “jj”. “aww it has a name!”

no matter how happy you looked from the boys, they couldn’t help but take a photo of you and ‘puppy’ jaehyun. they had to tell you before it was too late. the golden hour in the morning was shorter than sunset, so either they would tell you straight up, or let jaehyun transform back to human.

but guess what? they were too late. they shouldn’t have second-guessed.

what had happened was way beyond your comprehension. it was in an instant. all it felt in totality was that, you weren’t carrying a puppy anymore. you lost balance and the weight in your arms doubled or tripled, you couldn’t tell. but you knew you were falling backwards. was there to brace for impact? none.

you blinked several times from the orange sunrise blinding your vision from the window. slowly you got up to sit and soothe the pain. that hurt..

here’s the thing. remember you mentally told yourself you hoped you didn’t run into any naked boy in the basketball team’s showers? there you have it. you jinxed it. jaehyun’s figure was on top of yours and you knew he had no clothes on. oh goodness.

“hyung? you forgot your lunch box- oh.” sungchan barged in the scene and everyone could tell he sort of malfunctioned. he froze then facepalmed.

you took turns into looking at the embarrassed jaehyun and at the boys who whistled to avoid the numbers of questions you were going to ask.

kun quickly shielded your eyes where your doubts were showing in your face. and no matter how much thought hard, you just couldn’t believe it. with fear written all over you, you dusted your pants and hands reached kun’s arm to support your weight.

“oh so you shielded her eyes but not my body?!” jaehyun’s voice entered your ears and you swore there was a hint of puppy whimper.

“this is a dream.. right?..” you asked before you fainted.

sungchan managed to save you from the fall. “whoa! ah, i had a feeling something like this would happen.”

—

“was she always like that?” minnie took a peep of your classroom, her eyes showed confusion. “is she tired?”

lisa shrugged and in her innocence she pursed her lips. “i don’t know. she’s been sighing a lot for the past hour? i wanna ask her but it might be too personal.”

you could her them and they were wrong. it was nothing personal at all. you’ve been sighing because you didn’t know how it was possible but it just happened— right before your eyes. since then you hoped that science could explain but not even the smartest people could give you a conclusion. you’ve been called out from lessons that came in the day and not that you didn’t blame jaehyun.

because for one thing, he at least told you the truth and the answer to your question as to why he had to make you leave that day. you propped your chin on your palms from jaehyun’s warning: “tell anyone i swear i’ll make you run a hundred laps with no water breaks.”

but the other thing? he was naked. and that’s not something you could erase in your memories overnight.

you let out a small whine that led to minnie and lisa copying your position, obviously making fun of you. “seriously, not a good time.” you laid on the table and hid from them. “don’t ask me anything.”

minnie and lisa looked at each other as you were being unreasonable and already gotten them curious with your remark. they both grabbed each of your arm, tugging on your sleeves where they begged nonstop for you tell them what had happened. they knew it was about the basketball team.

since you started to train and be with them, you’ve never complained. because if you did, coach jung would add another exercise for you, in which you knew you couldn’t handle. broken bones and sore muscles awaited for you. so you chose not to utter a single sigh, but you were careless just now and there was no escaping from these best friends of yours.

“c’mon y/n! tell us the deets! you sighing could only mean one thing.. did someone confess to you?” minnie closed her eyes and a wide smile suddenly became shrieks of laughter when you facepalmed. “oh who in the basketball team confessed?” she singsonged.

it’s not really a confession, jaehyun being a golden puppy is a secret that was never meant to be revealed but i happened to see him transform-

“what if it’s not a guy? maybe two? or three? oh gosh this is like a reverse harem anime-” lisa began to hype an awful assumption but you covered her lips. and plus? her voice was loud and how embarrassing it would be when the rest of the class heard it.

you were already restless at their energy. “none you idiots. i was sighing because i didn’t know that people with dimples would be that attractive.” you tried to divert the topic.

“pfft you’re talking about jung jaehyun?” lisa raised her brows and grinned teasingly to get a reaction from you.

“no, i’m taking about coach jung.” you hit her arm.

“but jaehyun’s his carbon copy, so you’re basically saying he’s handsome too.” minnie quickly rebutted.

“i mean, coach’s the original face so he’s definitely more handsome-” you paused. shoot they nearly got you to a corner. “wait- why are we talking about this? i thought we’re talking about me.”

“ah you were paying attention to our conversation?” minnie’s eyes grew.

“you’re not telling us anything dimwit.” lisa hit you back.

couple of squeals echoed the corridor and your classroom door crowded with people. apparently jaehyun stood by the door frame and scanned the room looking for you. when he spotted you, his face bubbled up and literally glided his way to your seat. you could tell he was slightly fuming, but you didn’t know what reason. “y/f/n! come here for a second!” he grabbed your wrists and pulled you up from your chair.

you tried to catch up with his pace as he continued to pull you. “let me go!”

jaehyun did in fact let go of you, but he instead led you to hit your back against numerous lockers. the squeals didn’t stop there and how that you were the centre of attention amongst all of the students, you had endure this for a little while. he was staring into your soul, eyes piercing that could strain yours, you knew he was pissed about something.

he slammed his forearms at the space right above your head, then the screams of giddy began to grow louder. you managed to see your friends at the far end of the corridor. they were smiling and lisa mouthed ‘kabedon’, making you flustered than you already were. “what do you want?” you asked.

“i thought i made myself clear?” jaehyun smirked as he felt you quiver against his skin. he leaned lower that his whispers tickled your ear. “did you tell anyone? your friends?”

“i’m not gonna risk my health for some dumb secret.” you rolled your eyes and crossed arms.

“please it’s not like our training puts your life on jeopardy-” jaehyun butted back.

“it’s safe with me. if there’s anything you’re worried about, just look at your fanbase. you’re making them sad.” you sighed, walking away and through the girls who has been following jaehyun around.

jaehyun exhaled at a rather slow pace. he liked your reaction and was aware of their presence. and in order to shoo them away, he had to do what he did. he just hoped you’d notice that too. “see you after school!” he yelled.

you briefly stopped in your tracks at his greet, you continued walking and pulled your girls away from the scene. you didn’t pay any attention, but you knew they couldn’t contain their smiles appearing on their faces.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

the bags full of foldable cones fell to the floor. the rest of the team turned to your direction, who already made mistakes on the first day of camp. they knew that you were obviously flabbergasted with your encounter. it was funny that you managed to stride your way so quickly towards jungwoo— he was very much entertained with your expression. “i know right? that was me earlier.” he stroked the large pup.

“h-how did puppy grow so big? that’s an adult sized dog! you stuttered but hiding your love for golden retrievers just wasn’t possible. there were times you forgot that this was actually jaehyun. “it’s only been a week.”

“yeah i’d like to know the reason too.”

suddenly you heard jaehyun’s voice. it felt like he was close to your ears again, but he wasn’t anywhere near you.

remains of memories probably were still in you head. you wouldn’t say you were traumatised, just surprised. why the hell am i hearing his voice? you shook the thought off at first but then again-

oi y/n. beside you. i’m talking to you!

what?

you gasped and fell on your butt. the pup’s ears were on alert and you knew he was hearing you too. “you can hear me?” jaehyun’s dog form practically towered on your fallen self. you avoided his look although the pup was so cute. his paws poked your shoulders, whiskers twitching as he waited for your response. “don’t look away! you can hear me right??”

all the guys could see was jaehyun staring down at you. and while you did the same, your knitted brows only meant something was definitely going on. they wanted to know. “what’s wrong y/n?”

your lips shook in heavens knows it was fear. “you’re asking me what’s wrong? why can i hear jaehyun? can you hear jaehyun? oh my g- this is really really weird-”

“you can?” they scooted closer to you, very much intrigued with your gift.

“and you all can’t?” you pushed jaehyun away for his body was weighing you down. he whimpered and got up to sit in front of the boys too.

they shook their heads vigorously. “only sungchan and coach were able to hear him.” kun stated, typing on his cellphone to inform his family.

“y/n! let’s talk when i transform back!” jaehyun’s paws kept poking you again. you glared at him with a loud hiss. his ears were alert, he didn’t realise that he was clawing you already, and turned a few rounds before he was laying like a bagel-shaped position.

jaehyun thought it was pretty strange. never in his life were there any people who could actually converse with him telepathically. other than his family, you were the first and he was determined to find out why this impossibility was made possible. there was a spark of hope forming in his heart at this sudden revelation. the glow from the orange light then shone above your head, marking the end of sunrise.

you looked at jaehyun’s dog form, it was- correction, he was.. quiet, and was still staring at you as if you were his master. he laid on this front legs, snout on the ground. huh, he can actually be behaved. footsteps were closing in. at the distance, coach jung walked with lisa and minnie, who were in their cheerleading uniforms. right, you forgot that they were also included in the annual athletes camp.

for a moment you panicked because you knew jaehyun would transform back from being a dog. ten and rest knew more people shouldn’t know about jaehyun’s curse. they were glad you read the atmosphere too. seeing jaehyun’s jersey in his duffel bag, you grabbed it and wore it on the animal.

coach jung made eye contact to your direction. he diverted the girls’ attention, and led them away from the basketball court. they headed towards the storage to “retrieve” some equipment.

jaehyun grunted and growled, his fangs tried to bite your skin. however, goldens were known for having a soft jaw, so his bites weren’t that painful. when you finally managed to put the jersey on him, jungwoo couldn’t catch up. “why let him wear the jersey?” he questioned.

“so he wouldn’t transform back naked when lisa and minnie arrives.” you pointed out the obvious.

ten held his laugh in. you recognised this tone, and prepared what came after. “heh..” he trailed off. “is it because you want to keep jaehyun to yourself?”

you continuously threw random items at him as heat spread to your cheeks. “screw you!” you scoffed. “get jaehyun to wear his pants. i have to pack a lot of things before we head onto the bus.”

“yes ma’am.” ten nudged your shoulder. “i’m kidding y/n. don’t take my jokes seriously.“

“it’s fine.” you picked up the fallen cones. “you’re worried about people knowing his curse. so i’m just doing my part to keep it secret.”

he pursed his lips and his heart softened at your willingness to help. “hm, i guess i can trust you after all.” ten opened the bag to help you pack. “oh! and also, jae in his dog form already is naked anyway.”

“you think i’m not aware of that?” you rolled your eyes.

your friends already have settled themselves inside the coach bus and you were seated in between them. now they would get to witness you with the team and hoped for a budding romance with any of the boys. you lowered your face under a cap to pretend you were sleeping, but in reality you just wanted to avoid lisa and minnie’s bombardment.

few rows at front, jaehyun stared by the window, deep in thought. rarely spoke a word since they started their journey to the retreat campsite. why was his hunch telling him to get closer to you? why could you hear him and he could hear you? he slightly turned to his side between the gaps of two seats. seeing you giggling with your friends had him rethinking if what happened earlier was just his imagination. he wondered why you purposely ignore him after he transformed back.

he slid lower from his seat. “i’d understand if this was a soulmate thing, but it’s not.” jaehyun sighed heavily where he broke the silence and supposedly ending the conversation earlier. now that he wanted to talk about it, his friends were still up for the news.

“oh yeah. those things are going on. except it only happens to some people.” kun popped a chip in his mouth.

“i just don’t get it. dad told me that never occurred to anyone with this curse.” he stole the bag of chips from the younger one to relieve his emotions.

jungwoo’s pursed his lip in wonder. “maybe the curse in another light has its own blessing? maybe you guys are soulmates?”

“nah, impossible.” they all said simultaneously.

“it’s a possibility-” jungwoo’s face soured where wrinkles appeared on the sides as the boys flared at him.

jaehyun shrugged not knowing what to say. his friends have bizarre ideas throughout the journey, and he wouldn’t say they were wrong either. all he could do was to wait until the next transformation. maybe you would say your thoughts about it through telepathy.

he would know if time passed quickly when he didn’t pay attention to anyone. one of them was the number of times you waved in front of his face to snap him back to earth. “jaehyun?” you laid on the ground and called out, panting to catch air after your successful reps. you tugged the ends of his track pants.

“hm?” he hummed, looking for your voice until he got annoyed with your repetitive pulls of his clothes. “ah stop that. i have to report your record to coach. come with?”

“do i really have to?” you whined. “i could barely stand, my legs are wobbly and i’m hungry.”

jaehyun rolled his eyes and took your hand, pulling you up on your toes. “then let’s grab something to eat on our way to the camp, hm?”

you gulped at the sudden gesture, even more so when you noticed your heart beating faster around him. somehow your sixth sense told you your friends were somewhere in the woods looking at you, and you were right.

minnie had her binoculars by her eyes as you and jaehyun headed in another direction back to everyone else were. she held in her excitement with a huge inhale. out of curiosity lisa stole the binoculars from her. a growing smile showed her pearly whites when within its frame, jaehyun was pushing you from the back before he took your hand again because of how slow you were. “min, consider your reverse harem dream for y/n over. we found her leading man.”

—

“few more reps y/n! do it properly this time?”

jaehyun rubbed his face, raising his tone in question of your athleticism. it was the second and final day of your assessments. your core should be able to get used to the pressure if you’ve done the reps for two straight days. so as of today you salute to all people who persevered and with great stamina. you just.. weren’t that person.

you’ve grown conscious now that jaehyun’s friends were watching a few metres away. you’d prefer kun counting and timing your exercises over him. in contrast, kun’s a little more understanding than the hotheaded jaehyun. “if i say i can’t, shouldn’t you consider stopping here? it’s the last one anyway so put random number on the blank or something.” you struggled to lift yourself up from the ground, arms in an ‘x’ position over your torso.

“is that so? then you wouldn’t mind if i write ‘0’ for the final count?” jaehyun checked the stopwatch while his knees put enough weight on your feet. “at least do five more?” he sat on the soles of his shoes.

“ugh! fine!” you tsked and did sit ups slowly, eyes shut closed.

jaehyun smirked with how determined you were in finishing. and he has gotta credit you for having the last brain cell to endure his overly playful bossiness and plans up his sleeves.

but even his friends has something up in their sleeves. they whispered to each other and nodded heads as excitement already boosted their anticipation. ten cupped his mouth then giving the raised brows as signal to start. “y/n! jaehyun’s recording your expression with his phone!” ten yelled.

jungwoo’s mouth widened and followed along. “jae! there’s a bee behind you!”

“what?!”

“where?!”

the moment you froze and opened your eyes after bringing yourself up, and jaehyun leaned forwards to avoid the insect, was way too hilarious for the guys to see. both of your faces were centimetres away from each other and jaehyun’s ears already tinted pink. jaehyun already found it awkward to help you for three days, but he never prepared himself for something like this.

as his friends bursting out laughing, that was when he realised it was all their plan. you were still too close to him, so he cleared his throat to cut the gap between. “is that a pimple on your nose?” he asked, only for his nose to be smacked and soon be numbed. “agh!”

what the- “jerk! don’t point it out!” you kicked him and rolled sideways to stand up, angrily leaving the area with the sheet in your hands. “i’ll give this to the coach!”

jaehyun held his nose and walked back to the guys, who were still laughing their butts off and rolling on the ground. “you can stop now.”

“oh that was funny! it was like a typical ‘ba-dump’ scene in a rom-com!” jungwoo wiped a tear.

“should’ve recorded it!” kun threw his head back while his hand rested on his heaving chest.

“no worries! at least it’s recorded in jaehyun’s mind!” ten cheered with closed fists.

“it’s embarrassing!” jaehyun threw his towel.

bonfires were mandatory at the start and end of the camp. however, because of your assessment, coach jung had negotiate with the other members of the basketball to get to the campsite a day before the other teams actually arrived at night. so for the kun and the rest, they had a little more free time than jaehyun. and him being the coach’s son.. he didn’t have the same benefits. he was stuck with you because he had to keep an eye on you while

he thought being with you would only be for the first two days, then he would go for his training. and yet here you were, sitting beside him in front of the bonfire while everyone else arrived and other danced to their hearts’ content. maybe he could ask you about the telepathy thing? but figuring you were cranky from earlier, he held back.

“can i ask more about your curse? if it’s okay with you to tell me.”

jaehyun nodded, you had the right to. not because you accidentally picked a random puppy then saw him naked few moments later. you could hear him in your head, and that was enough reason to tell you rather than a general information about it. “yeah. i’m okay with it.”

“you said your ancestors had the curse too. was there any specific reason why they had to suffer that your family and you had to be the..” you paused for a while. jaehyun was waiting for your next words, you guessed it was alright to say it. “..collateral damage?”

“right. i didn’t tell you more of it yeah?” he sniffed from the chilly night. “i don’t know how far back in the years it happened. but they said the head of the family casted out his wife because he assumed he cheated on him. he was the only person the wife ever treasured, so when she was accused, she took his pet and killed it. the head found out, he cursed her that her descendants turn into animals. and we’re the descendants of that woman.”

“that’s awful.” you cleared your throat. “i’m sorry you have to suffer the curse.”

“you don’t have to be. i’m just trying to cope with it.” jaehyun chuckled. “how awesome would it be if there was a way to reverse everything.”

“gotta find the blessing then.” you laid on the grass.

jaehyun’s face wrinkled in disgust. “okay you sound like jungwoo.”

“at least appreciate me for trying to lift your spirits up.”

he hummed in agreement.

“or you can just.. let the blessing find you.” you singsonged as you realised how corny you actually sounded.

“fine, and if it’s you?” he had to give a hint of the telepathic communication.

“because i can hear you when you’re in your retriever form? i’m not exactly a blessing but yeah i’d like to know how telapthy works too.” you stared back at the bonfire, flames flickering as the smoke flew in the air. as of tonight, you wanted to be that person who’d be the igniter of that hope he held on. “if i could help out a little, i’ll be happy to help.”

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

lisa and minnie stared at you, both had their palms under their chins as if their silence asked you to talk. “i can’t eat when the two of you are like this. it’s very disturbing.” you gripped on your fork, hesitant to eat as you took glances between the food and them.

you knew what they were going to ask. not like you didn’t want to share, it was just that you knew them well enough that they wouldn’t stop once they start. the food was getting cold every second passed, due to the wind outdoors, it was more vulnerable. lisa stretched her elbows while holding her poms to be noticed. five days have gone by and even though you were rarely with them in all those days, she had to ensure you’d tell them about the basketball team and your leading man— although you had no idea about that.

“any updates?” she raised her brows.

“nothing is happening with me or anyone in the team, if that’s what you both wanted to know.” you sighed. “i’m just simply taking down minutes.” you said sternly, kind of regret that you answered her and swirled the noodles with your fork.

“are you sure? twelve members should be enough for that.” minnie tied her shoelaces and bent down with a pressed smile when you pout. she softened her gaze when you were telling the truth and that their teasing should stop there. but they knew that the team should know something about you.

“they’re divided into teams. some did the score board while others practiced on their own. of course i have to be the one- why are you pulling my arm?” you asked and eyed them as if they stained your clothes.

lisa twirled on her toes and posed with her arm rested on her waist. “you’re being quiet again.”

“i’m not?” you said monotonously while you munched on your food.

she sighed and grabbed your chin. “you don’t look at me when you’re lying.” she hummed, yet you didn’t respond. “what’s up y/n? something’s on your mind i can tell.”

in fact a lot of things were.

so far in the week, you’ve helped jaehyun theorise solutions to end his curse after practice. not only for him, but his family and extended family too. some have passed not having to enjoy their lives, while others chose to hide themselves from the world. and a small percentage of the family tree actually tried to live through it— that was jaehyun’s family. coach jung was as determined as jaehyun to put a stop into this curse.

not only that thought alone. to you, jaehyun has been rather noticeable. even if you weren’t thinking of him, he’d appear out of nowhere— during your breaks, on your night-walks alone or even heading to the toilet. you’d always bump into him and his presence seemed to be marked in your consciousness now. not that you liked him around, it was just captain was more friendly than others made him out to be. “really, it’s nothing.”

to say that jaehyun didn’t feel same was definitely an understatement. since the start of the freshman year, he knew you were the loud girl with the two hot cheerleaders, but always wondered why you’ve never joined the team. sometimes he would catch you sitting at one corner, dancing along with the routines aside from cheering your friends on as he was heading to practice.

now he took a peek of you eating alone while lisa and minnie showed off their new uniforms. he was about to call you out to help the team, but the girls pulling you almost immediately once you were done had him holding back. “chaeyeon will be arriving soon, and remember the dare was to wear our uniform.” minnie giggled while you begged her to stop, to the point you nearly cried thinking about it. “you agreed to it-”

“i didn’t agree to it! you agreed for me! i had no say!”

jaehyun’s eyes widened at the thought of you in uniform. your yells were getting louder and pitchier. should he be your knight and shining armour? probably not. he’d like to have something to tease you about. for a moment there was silence, he hid behind the corner of a storage building. you were still telling your friends to stop doing what they were doing. but it was two against one, and he knew you were at the losing end.

the door slammed open, your huffs and puffs getting heavier and closer to where he was. jaehyun’s heart beat so fast that when he finally decided to call out your name, you bumped into him and he caught you to prevent you from falling. “i was about to fetch you, manager.”

you felt heat spread your entire cheek because of the attire you were forced to wear. “well you did and i’m here. can we go? my friends are giving me the stares.”

“fiesty, but i think you look alright.” he chuckled when you grumpily walked ahead. jaehyun followed you from behind with his hands in pockets.

what does he mean by that?

lisa and minnie pursed their lips, soon bursting into giddy squeals and continuously fanning each other from what they saw yet the second time. “he was really checking her out.” minnie laughed.

“his ears said it all.” lisa checked her watch on her wrist. “basketball team’s practice match is starting soon. wanna sit in?”

“girl you bet i will.”

even hours later you blew your baby fringes blocking your view. as you flipped the score board and whistles for a time-out echoed the outdoor gym, your friends could tell how uncomfortable you were but they’d do nothing to get more reactions from you. they liked that you entertained them. and what choice did you have? chaeyeon was already taking pictures of you in the uniform you despised wearing.

coach jung briefed the team information on their opponents this season. you wrote down important points, feeling the chill of the early sunset. you couldn’t wait to change into actual soft and comfy clothes, mosquitoes weren’t your friends.

jaehyun listened to his dad repeating the same points- mostly because he got the advice first before others. he heard you hiss several times, you were supposed to jot the notes down. then it got frequent. he tiptoed to see you opposite from him, shooing the bugs away. of course you were still wearing the cheer uniform. he didn’t want to draw attention, so he stealthy walked behind the guys and straight to you.

“trouble?” he asked.

“just a little chilly, that’s all. meeting’s nearly done yeah?” you hugged the file to your chest.

“say so if you’re cold.” he took his jacket off and draped it on your shoulder.

“and who am i to tell to?” your voice challenging him.

he hummed so low that it almost lulled you to sleep. “me. i’m not the captain for nothing.”

you were both busy talking that you and him weren’t aware of time nor anyone else close by. mind you that minnie and lisa were watching the whole thing. you managed to smile even if you were crossed with how you were dressed. like you enjoyed his company.

they couldn’t hear your conversation, nor were your lips were moving. but the body language they saw already proved and confirmed their assumption. they had to tell you. they went straight to you once the meeting was over, and pulled you aside whilst jaehyun was talking about his childhood.

jaehyun raised a brow and chuckled as you were being pulled away. his friends immediately surround him, bombarding him with questions that he wasn’t paying attention to the meeting. “dude, your time’s near.” ten smacked him on the back.

“don’t make it sound like i’m dying, ten.” jaehyun rolled his eyes, but whenever he did, they were always fixated on you. he couldn’t shake off the feeling you were that something to solve the curse.

“be alert than be busted.” ten shrugged, head tilting to where you were. your friends were busy recording you and giggles filled the air. “how are you so calm now jae?”

jaehyun pursed his lips. “with her, there’s no way i’m calm at all.”

“okay now i can’t tell if that answer was from human jaehyun or doggy jaehyun.” jungwoo pointed out.

his friends all looked at each other, jaehyun wasn’t his usual self. it was as if he was dazed but was able to converse with them properly. slowly his naturally peach-like fuzzy cheeks grew more fur, his tail started to reveal. although they were quick enough to hide jaehyun, they didn’t realise the commotion that came afterwards and drew everyone’s attention.

you swifted your head at the boys’ yells and gathering circle, faintly hearing jaehyun’s refusal into whatever they got him into. “stop it! hey!” he hissed.

jungwoo, a little too excited of the drama going on, spotted you looking at them and gestured you to come over too. your friends built up a curiosity and went ahead of you. as for you, you were mentally tired to think of anything.

not until you heard kun’s wavering yet convincing words. “uh.. y’all wanna see magic?” he chuckled nervously as he knew what jaehyun would do to him after all this was over. “quickly because it’ll happen soon!”

you held in a laugh at jaehyun when he was forced to sit down on the grass to hide his tail. “i’ve been trying to master this for months and i thank jaehyun as my participant. who loves animals? give me a name.”

most hands were up and the answers were said at the same time. some didn’t believe him, but others have seen kun’s little magic tricks over the days. so something of a huge scale like this already got them curious than ever.

“ah i hear great ones but i’ll choose dog. now i’ll turn jaehyun into a golden retriever.” he draped a blanket above his friend.

ten and jungwoo bit their lips to contain themselves, holding onto each other as they filmed this once-in-a-lifetime event. the circle enlarged in scale with the poor lad at the center and the golden hour shone over everyone.

“in 3.. 2.. 1..” kun only snapped his fingers then the blanket shrunk in size. your schoolmates were convinced that something was actually happening.

and it was amusing because you were able to hear jaehyun swearing so much in your head.

you let out a giggle. jaehyun was soon surrounded by everyone who wanted to pet him. even your friends went over to the animal. “at least pretend to be happy for them. goldens are known for being clowns.” you told him.

*sighs* “tell kun i’m gonna kill him.”

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

the silence was all jaehyun ever wanted after the shock he had to go through from kun’s improv few days ago. he’d be thankful for a moment because he actually forgot the gideon hour at the time, but he would soon later be clouded with annoyance that he should’ve been informed beforehand of his actions— not only kun, the others included. they’ve got a part in this too.

his friends seated side by side with bruises and bandages on their faces, jaehyun still giving them the silent treatment. he was cranky about that, yet even more so when there was no progress into finding a solution to his curse. “jae. we said we’re sorry.” jungwoo apologised and felt that he was the only one giving effort to talk to jaehyun compared to kun and ten.

“and i said it’s fine. so stop saying that before i actually don’t forgive you.” jaehyun pressed the bridge of his nose.

after walking up the slope to the cabin with heaves of breaths, you managed to hear their conversation before opening the door. “i refilled your bottles.” you threw them on a duffle bag, not caring whether either of them rolled away. “i have to apologise too, jaehyun. i haven’t come up with anything to help you.” true enough because you couldn’t think straight or have the energy to use your remaining brain cells for that matter.

“ugh it’s fine. i’m not in a rush or anything. not even assigning you to solve within the duration of the camp.” jaehyun squeezed the bottle as thirst continued to drive him crazy, the heat as well, so he removed his tshirt. you averted your gaze and looked elsewhere. maybe you were still a little bothered seeing him half naked after the incident?

ten sought the opportunity and decided to fan the flame even more. “why look away when you’ve seen him already?”

he managed to dodge your hits and you turned around embarrassed. jaehyun could see you fanning yourself from the heat. “it was an accident!” you cleared your throat.

“gah i’m tired. we’re done with practice. we get a day off tomorrow, so can’t we watch a movie? who has disney plus?” jungwoo wiped himself with a towel.

“i do.” kun brought out his ipad. “what do you wanna watch?”

“i haven’t watched that one.”

“beauty and the beast?”

“o-kay, i’ll be going now.” you yawned as you began to feel the exhaustion take over your body. “see you tomorrow.”

the door closed and suddenly you remembered a funny memory last halloween when taeil dressed himself as belle. he blended in with the other ladies that you didn’t realise it was him. either it was the wig’s work or just taeil in general. you found it funny when a bunch of young teens become children again as disney’s mentioned.

your phone vibrated with your friends asking to help them out with their practice. “i came to the camp for the basketball team, not you two.” you left a voice mail. all you wanted was to rest up today. not until a certain realisation hit you hard.

because what if?

it hasn’t been that long since you left the cabin when the boys jolted from their positions. their peace and concentration on the movie already ruined by you. “oh my goodness i think i got it?” you slammed the door.

jaehyun sat up and set his phone aside. “you’re saying it a question rather than a discovery. not convinced.”

“will you be when i tell you if it’s based on that movie?” you pointed at the tablet.

he trailed his eyes to the screen then back at you, a more confused expression on his face. “you expect me to find someone to love me so my curse will be lifted?”

“pfft nah kidding, you don’t seem that loveable anyway.” you stole a lollipop from ten. “okay bye for reals.”

as the door closed, ten unwrapped another lollipop. “bet you he’s thinking of his potential ‘belle’.” ten nudged the boys.

“shut up. i’m not going to base my life on a fictional movie.”

“but it could be y/n. i mean she can hear you.” jungwoo paused the film.

“it’s not going to be her and it doesn’t prove anything.”

jaehyun thought a lot for two things— you keeping his hopes up, the other was you setting his heart in a frenzy and he always hated that feeling. he groaned and dragged himself to bed to place a towel over his face. sure he’ll hold on to that idea you came up with for now. however it didn’t prove on telepathy.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

your heart missed a beat when jaehyun waited for you in front of the cabin you stayed at. he thought you bumping into his torso wasn’t a good way to greet in the morning, whereas you feeling some fur on his tshirt as greeting was any different. jaehyun handed you a file and a little note from coach.

while you read it, you could sense jaehyun was staring, like he had something to say. he retracted his lips when your friends appeared behind you with grins annoyingly appearing on their faces. “make it quick captain. we have things to discuss with y/n.”

“yeah sure. i just dropped by to pass this to you. coach said to make copies. i’ll come back after you’re done with breakfast.” he cleared his throat and announced his leave.

“hm. fishy. he could’ve just left it here outside but he seems like he waited for you.” lisa drank from her cup as you all sat and ate breakfast together.

“right? it’s been days he acted that way!” minnie walked back to the table. “he’s indeed a gentleman, but there are times he’s very hard to approach.”

you unwrapped the sandwich and took a bite. “anyway, what is it you guys wanna talk about?”

“lisa will go first. she couldn’t wait.” minnie giggled.

lisa laid out series of pictures of nature she recently took and were indeed beautiful. “oh my goodness they look amazing!” you sat up. “as expected from someone in the photography club. i bet if you submit these to johnny he’ll regret putting you as backup-”

“really?! i took advantage of the retreat and i made sure they were pretty!” lisa interrupted you and placed more pictures down. “these are my favourite! i’m thinking of sending these to johnny instead!”

however your face turned sullen at the next pictures. they were blurry and almost gone, but it was definitely jaehyun at the background, each one showed he was transforming from human to dog. you paused and your heart did the same.

the silence got longer, you knew you had to speak up, but no words came out. “what’s wrong y/n?”

“you can’t submit these to johnny.” you brushed the first batch of pictures aside and bind latest pictures together.

“why not? you supported the rest of them! how could these be not good enough?” lisa’s voice changed in an instant, like you’ve taken away her pride. she sat back with folded arms, her behaviour scared you a little.

minnie slightly wiggled your hand. “hey, are you hearing to yourself y/n?”

“sorry, i know i sound stupid-”

“you are!” lisa huffed where her cheeks blew up. it was cute though.

“but you have to hear me out.” one thing was for sure, your stress levels shot up high if word gets to jaehyun. you had to prepare for the consequences.

“okay, so why can’t i submit them?” lisa sighed.

you held her hand. “it would be alright to, only if these are not in the background.” you said, pointing out a figure at the background of the subject. it all became clear as day to them when they looked closely. “did jaehyun just.. transformed?”

you were surprised with how quick they were able to catch on. as much as you wanted to protect jaehyun’s family curse, things would’ve turn for worst if someone else had noticed it. i’m sorry jaehyun, this is for your own good.

“we believed kun’s ability of illusion and his magic tricks. ten sent us a video of it and it didn’t really occurred to us that the golden was actually jaehyun.” minnie pursed her lips. “if you think about it, he does look like a golden.”

“how is this possible?” lisa asked with a growing smile, but refrained since transforming twice everyday was nothing good anyway.

“i found about his family curse accidentally. he turns into a dog when it’s golden hour, like sunrise and sunset.” you propped on your elbows.

“it’s a curse? poor lad.” minnie gasped.

a rather sad nod caught them off guard. “the coach signed me up to join this retreat. it’s not only for my missed p.e assessments but it was to keep his curse a secret. a-and now that you know, i’ll be damned if word gets to him. so you have to promise me you both don’t say or do anything..“ you sounded as if you begged. that was how much your the friendship you have with jaehyun meant to you.

“and yeah, that’s my answer. the magic trick was just a cover up to hide jaehyun’s dog form.” they listened and were surprised to hear you like this.

your fidgety hands and nervous breathing was too obvious. if jaehyun was just a friend, you wouldn’t act as if he was your- “oh no.” you slumped down on your arms. “why did i..” you mumbled as your feelings for him became clearer to you.

“oh my gosh. you like him! you like jaehyun!” lisa covered her mouth and changed the lingering negative atmosphere.

ba-dump. i..

“then that means your love for golden retrievers doubled!” minnie hugged you.

“no! it’s b-because you’re putting m-me in the spotlight-” you stuttered when they leaned towards you. “i’m gonna go.”

jaehyun flinched even though he was at a distance. your friends were yelling quite excitingly. you were being chased by them and although it was inaudible. he answered his phone as it was ringing for a while. “what, ten?”

“don’t ‘what’ me!” jaehyun tilted his head from his friend’s volume. “jae where are you?”

“i’m at y/n’s cabin and on my way bac-”

“nevermind that. i can see you.”

ten rushed towards him and looked at the cabin. “where’s lisa?” he squinted his eyes.

“just her and minnie chasing y/n out. i don’t know how but they left the door open. what are you doing here anyway?”

he mimicked a photographer’s gesture and pointed at the cabin. “lisa told me her pictures have developed and i’m here to get them.”

jaehyun flicked his forehead. “and you could’ve asked me instead.”

“they’re confidential and i’m shy if anyone sees it.” ten walked to the cabin.

“gross. just get them and head back quickly.”

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

you lost track of the days that have passed and there was an unsettling feeling that stayed in your chest. had it been two or three? you couldn’t remember. the basketball team’s practice matches and drills were normal. but there was a difference in air lingering around jaehyun. he still talked to you, kept the same gentle smile and was caring as usual. except whenever he did those, it seemed like he was distancing himself from you, creating an imaginary wall just to let you know your limits and boundaries.

you’d like to think it was because of the pressure coach has been giving him since the play-offs were close to date. but, it wasn’t all jaehyun who behaved that way. ten also distanced himself, his gaze pierced against your skull and thinking about it only caused you to have migraines. you were more scared of ten.

coach jung have asked you to help the cheerleading team, saying you’ve helped them enough. the amount of appreciation he had for you was too much, you couldn’t ask him about how jaehyun recently. yet this was all too sudden that your gut feeling told you otherwise. you planned to talk to jaehyun after the day ends. because in all honesty, something definitely happened.

and the boys left you out of it.

approaching jaehyun was harder than you thought. now you’ve realised it, he was always the one who took the initiative and you on the receiving end took the benefits of his kindness. it was supposed to be the other way around, so why were you taking advantage of this?

if having feelings for him was the reason for that, then you’re really stupid y/n. you laid on the grass in defeat from your thoughts and closed your eyes. you decided to have some peace and nature was your best friend in time like these. chirping birds and crashing riverbanks-

“jaehyun where are you?!”

ah crap. you twitched hard enough that swarms of goosebumps appeared on the majority of your skin. on your stomach, you hid behind the bushes to see jungwoo and the others struggling to find him. even at the mention of his name you were already feeling shy and flustered.

“is he skipping practice again?”

“ah whatever let’s just leave him.”

“i understand why he’s like that.”

“even i would feel hurt if i were him.”

a heavy and deep audible breath from their sudden entry was difficult to hide your response. you tried to leave as quiet as possible. not wanting to get caught, you had to move stealthily with few glides backwards on your knees, eyes glued to the boys’ actions if they looked elsewhere. when you felt something blocking the soles of your shoes, somehow you knew what it was.

“you’re blocking my way.” jaehyun’s irritated tone made your chest ache— in the most painful impact you never expected from him.

quickly you stood up and made sure you stayed out of sight from the boys. jaehyun scratched his temple at your awkward behaviour. he was already in front of you, why were you hesitating to ask him questions he left unanswered? jaehyun pulled a long face when you still remained silent. “if you’re not gonna speak when you clearly have something to say, do i really have to say it for you?”

what the hell is his problem? what’s with his tone? “yeah as a matter of fact i do. the thing is, i don’t understand why you’re being like this. you ignore me but still talk to me when i don’t help with the team anymore, and for some reason you’re mad at me?” you grimaced while leaning on a tree trunk.

there was cynism in jaehyun’s nods and the swirls of his tongue evident on his cheeks. you hated his attitude and all you wanted was an explanation. “whatever this is, i’ve got no reason for you to doubt me, jaehyun.”

“ah, really? ‘cause you just gave me one.” he fished out something from his pockets and as you watched, the item he was holding was too familiar and they were obviously not his. he flicked the sheets and that was when you confirmed they were the new pictures lisa developed.

why were they with him? at the pit of your stomach, a whirlwind of emotions and stressing pressure began, and you didn’t like the feeling at all. “what-”

he threw the pictures on the floor. “other than my family and friends you’re the only one who knows about my curse! and at some point you go against my back telling them to picture me when i’m left clueless?!”

right now you were really afraid jaehyun’s mood would attract attention.

you closed your eyes as he raised his voice. “look i have no idea how you got those but i promise you i had nothing to do with the picture-” you insisted and could feel your blood pressure rising.

“how- how could you betray me like this?!”

your heart fell and instead of feeling bad about him knowing, you felt your head ache with so much anger building up inside you. because jaehyun didn’t bother to listen or let you explain yourself.

“i found you in the background before lisa actually showed those to johnny! it would spread if she did! where’s the betrayal in that?!”

he stepped closer to you, your entire was itching to run away. “i don’t care! you still told your friends! you could’ve said another excuse like kun’s practicing his magic trick or something! you promised me my secret’s safe with you!”

that’s messed up. i did tell lisa and minnie but not because it was to mock him!

“kun was no where to be seen in the picture! what else can i do? lie to them? i know my friends more than you do and they won’t tell anyone!” you raised your voice as well.

jaehyun scoffed, rolling his eyes. “i don’t trust them!”

“well, i do! and you should trust me!” your tone wavering at all emotions hitting you at once. especially coming from him— the guy you developed feelings for.

“the moment you told them you broke my trust already! what else did you tell them, hm? my dad and brother having the curse too?” he brushed his hair in anger when your silence meant yes. “ugh is this really happening?! you told them everything!”

“okay that’s enough-” your vision blurring from the tears wanting to fall.

“i’m asking what else did you tell them?! dammit y/n what could be so important to you than my secret?!”

“well- i-”

“i what?!”

other than the secret, you knew what went after the reveal. then you realised the weight of your words, you couldn’t tell him that you actually like him. you wanted to be selfish this once. “i can’t.. tell you.”

jaehyun started to harbour more resentment towards your reasoning. he found it ridiculous of you to even continue with this conversation. ten already warned him that the secret wasn’t safe with you in the first place. the glimpse of hope faded when he thought you’d be the key, even if you were, trust was still important to him. it was the very thing his mother lacked and you doing so reminded him of it.

his expression darkened and you were afraid of him— excluding of how cruel he was with you on the exercise reps. you were afraid you just broken a promise and put your friendship on a rocky end.

“so that’s it? i’m begging you with my life on the line and you just gave me the most bullcrap answer!”

“you’re being unreasonable!” you yelled.

“shut up! you found about my curse so you should be the one compromising!”

“y/n!” lisa came running with a panicked face.

tsk, wrong timing. “not now.” you mouthed.

“have you seen my pictures?! i told ten to get them the other day but he got the wrong envelope! it’s the one with jae-” she bent down to catch her breath and was taken aback with jaehyun’s presence. “..hyun.”

the boys followed lisa and once they found their friend, you could tell ten’s stares that felt like daggers. he pulled jaehyun away but eyes still locked on you. “what happened?” lisa asked as you mirrored ten’s expression, but your friends could see the hurt in your eyes.

“he has the pictures. i think ten saw them and gave them to him. jaehyun’s mad, he thinks i betrayed him for telling you-”

“no that’s not it!” lisa held your hand and glared at the boys, especially ten, since he was her childhood friend. “you had every right to tell us because the pictures are my works-”

“shouldn’t have said anything further y/n! you should’ve gotten the pictures and told us instead of them! you promised, remember?” ten finally spoke up.

you rolled your eyes. “and what?! you’re like saying i should risk my friendship for his stupid secret!”

his friends turned heads to jaehyun to see his tight-knit brows and softening demeanour. jaehyun frowned and hurt was evident in his face. he was hurt by you, someone he developed feelings for in a short amount of time. “i believed it when you said you’ll help me. or were.. were all those just words to you?”

ah.. that came out wrong.

you bit your lips to say something, but they left so soon after, making your chest squeeze as if your lungs let out the last bits of oxygen from your body.

shortly over an hour, jungwoo watched his friend pace back and forth, nibbling on his nails when the tension grew in their cabin. “aren’t you too hard on her? you didn’t let y/n explain further-”

“i can’t believe her!” jaehyun crumpled the picture after looking at it. “how could she do this to me?!”

“honestly i just don’t think she’s that type of person to go behind someone’s back for her own entertainment.” kun spoke up and tilted his head, avoiding the cup that smashed on his side of his cheek. “perhaps you’re mistaken.”

jaehyun wasn’t in the right headspace whenever his past trauma was reminded or brought up, so no matter how much reason was given, he wouldn’t listen. “do i have to repeat it? she already had her fun when she told her friends to picture me!”

“your explanations are always so conclusive.” kun sighed.

“and your heart’s too soft as usual, kun! so back off!” jaehyun grabbed the older one’s shoulder and shoved him against the wall.

he released him soon after realising that he didn’t once listen to you, but he was too stubborn to take any more excuses. there was one thing he thought you were wrong— weren’t you risking your friendship with him by exposing his secret he kept so dearly? maybe distancing himself more than he did would clear his mind off from the mess.

—

when all sports teams lined up with their designated coach buses the days after, jaehyun slightly put his chin up to search for you in the crowd— in a subtle manner, since he still stood in his decision into having his space from you yet didn’t want it to be obvious to others that he cared for you still.

you knew he was staring from afar. it was a stupid misunderstanding, both of you were in the wrong, but he made you feel as if you carried the blame for this.

sure that was a given, that he would react worse than expected. you were going to take the pictures from lisa anyway, and the guys wouldn’t know that your friends knew. you didn’t expect you’d burst out of anger or that ten took them before you did and made the assumption. it still drove you mad, ten probably convinced jaehyun of your doing since he didn’t trust you at first.

that aside, you decided to ride the coach bus with the cheerleading team. “when we reach school, you can forget about the basketball team and camp. how dare they hurt you?” minnie hugged you as you stared out the window.

“if i had to weigh it, it’s not me who’s hurting. jaehyun is.” you sighed and pat her back. “how do i act if i bump to any of them? i’ll probably do something stupid again. at all cost, i’mma just- *sigh*”

“she’s talking about jaehyun right?”

“yeah she’s still not straightforward about him.”

“we know she likes him. she doesn’t have to hide it.”

“i can hear you both.” you lowered your hat to avoid their gaze.

jaehyun sat beside his father at the front for a change, playing with the blinds to cover sunlight. coach jung knew his silence more than anyone, even if jaehyun didn’t plan on telling him. “i’ve done what you told me to do. you didn’t want to see y/n after the fight. so? did it to any change?”

“no. i kept my distance and i’ll see if she’ll admit her mistake.” jaehyun adjusted the fan above him.

“jae, if only you saw her reaction when i told her to not come see the team. i know you’re smarter than this. you know it’s not all her fault.”

he clenched his palms hard. crescent moons soon showed themselves on the flesh. “where exactly in this is my fault, dad? have i not been patient to wait for curse to be broken? who said that y/n might have a contribution in this? it’s you, dad. i’m not holding any grudge against y/n. i’m just disappointed at her because she’s nothing i ever imagined her to be. goodness’ sake i even like her.” he mumbled at the last sentence, missing the point that his dad could hear it.

coach jung let out a short laugh at the remark. “not sure if you noticed, you haven’t seen y/n working hard at researching about our curse while you boys practiced. she’s always brainstorming at the possibilities, science or not, she’s always looking for ways. don’t let anger cloud you.” his father paused and had a pressed smile. “..don’t end up having small fights like me and your mother. you wouldn’t want it to be bigger than it already is.”

“yeah.. i know.”

you woke up with a thud and saw a rather prominent bump on your right temple through the reflection of the window. arriving at the campus grounds was quicker than you thought, despite being almost a half day journey. you overheard that the basketball team would stay there a little longer and you had to leave immediately because once everyone has gone home, you’d see him. you didn’t want to risk yourself from being spotted after you both fought.

it was a small matter now that you think about that day. stubbornness outweighed understanding in the two of you, and that resulted in immaturity. and if neither of you were willing to admit, might as well make the first move.

but you were stubborn as he was.

once the coach bus was nearing the parking area, the first and only thing you decide to do was get out of the vehicle and head straight home. you wouldn’t let your friends speak and looked at their bus. there sat jaehyun fiddling with the curtain. you then rushed out, covering your face from the basketball team as they too were getting off. “is that what she meant ‘at all costs’?” minnie facepalmed as she saw you walking away quickly.

“oh look, there’s y/n.” coach jung tapped the window to make jaehyun notice you. the way you behaved was weird for him, because it was too obvious you were avoiding getting seen.

“i don’t care.”

“it means you do.” his father messed his son’s hair. “okay, off you go. i’ll cancel the extra practice today and let all of you rest up during the weekend.”

jaehyun’s lips agape at his father’s last minute decision. he wore his cap and slung his bag. “if you’re doing this and expect i’d make up with her, you’ll regret ever cancelling practice.”

“ah c’mon. your old man is helping you out with a girl. can’t you tell what i’m doing, jae?” he laughed at his son’s reaction. he could see himself in jaehyun and knew things would get better.

“it won’t work dad.”

he rolled his eyes and went to where the bikes were parked. he kicked the stand at the rear wheel when his friends caught up to him with their own bikes. goodness why can’t they just leave me alone? “what do you want?” he stood a little to pedal ahead.

kun rode along beside him, eyes alternating at and on the road. “what now? you’re just going to pretend you didn’t see y/n? like nothing happened?”

“how can i ignore that when her figure’s so obvious and literally running away from here? i’m not going to do anything about-”

jungwoo then sighed heavily, causing jaehyun to knit brows. “she looked over our bus you dimwit! that means she thought of talking to you but held back because of-”

“i’ll talk to y/n in my own terms and in my own time! stop forcing me to do things when you think it would work well for me!” jaehyun pressed on the brakes with his palms.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

kun and jungwoo’s eyes followed your swirling fork and the silent air that had been going for half an hour. they thought knocking onto the doors of jaehyun’s closed heart was hard, never expected yours was harder. you wouldn’t say anything after they invited you, claiming they missed you around them.

because it had been two full semesters since then. from what the boys told you, jaehyun lost focus and couldn’t lead the team to the championships. he always fought with his father and would burst in anger, throwing unnecessary fits towards them even though they worked hard to reach the quarterfinals.

this behaviour would happen so often that it began to strain his relationships with everyone on the team. the transformation did a lot worse to his body, he’d get sick and weak, and for over months, he would not transform back immediately within the golden hour ended. it lasted longer. sometimes even the morning after.

it worried them that if jaehyun given up all hope and continued to act that way, the urge to find the solution would never take place. and that he would remain an animal forever. even so, you knew their intentions to invite you today despite feeling sad for jaehyun. and you prepared your answer before they could speak.

“y/n-”

“as much as i love to stay, i’m here to tell you you’ve wasted your efforts. if jaehyun won’t talk to me.. then i’ll just keep giving him space until he apologises first.” you were already losing appetite talking about it.

“and you think waiting game would pull off too, hm?” kun’s dimple deepened, a flat smile seen on the exterior.

you put down your fork. “i didn’t think we’ll last this long not talking-”

ten smirked in disbelief, you forgot he was there too. his presence was almost non-existent as he kept quiet the whole time. “keep it like that. you’re held accountable for making jaehyun the way he is now.”

“ten!” kun scowled at the guy. “i told you not to talk.”

you rolled your eyes that his words hurt more than the eye roll. “why is he here anyway? you said it’ll only be the two of you. unbelievable.”

“to see if you came up with a solution to lift jaehyun’s curse. looking at you now, i guess you didn’t.” he said and you tried your best to refrain yourself from hitting him. “were you mocking him when you suggested it might be the same answer as that disney film?”

“i said as a joke but it might be a possibility. we live in a world where people go through inexplainable experiences that science couldn’t dive in deep.” you sighed.

jungwoo tapped the table to stop the bickering you and ten were starting. “like my hunch says, maybe it’s another soulmate thing i’ve mentioned to you guys at the camp.”

“it’s not a soulmate thing, jungwoo.” kun and ten said simultaneously.

you brought out an a5 sized sealed envelope and the action alone made the boys stunned. “don’t open this. just give it to him. anyway, the sun’s setting. i really have to go.” you passed the item to kun.

it’s suffocating. i can’t stay here long. they saw how hesitating your limbs were, your eyes averting them and clearing your throat several times.

“ten, does this look like she didn’t do anything? this proves she’s trying.” kun took the envelope and hit it on ten’s head.

as you put on your coat whilst standing next to the table, ten sat back with arms crossed. “acting smart, aren’t you? you really think you’re the belle for jaehyun huh? i wouldn’t believe that for a second.”

“i didn’t say anything about me being the solution. i’m still keeping my promise to help him. and trust me, i don’t think i’m belle either.” you grabbed your bag and left, your food gone cold and jungwoo sighed at the air turning worse thanks to ten.

the cash money was placed on the table when kun called the waiter. “please keep the change.” he looked at your slouching figure by the bus stop across the restaurant. it screamed sadness and hurt all over.

the reason for suddenly leaving wasn’t because you were offended with what ten said. of course there was truth in his words. at some point you thought you were someone important to jaehyun, since you could hear him.

you thought you both were soulmates.

you left because you spotted a familiar figure standing by the door. haven’t been seeing him lately only made you feel angry at yourself. you were a coward, you even passed the envelope to the boys instead of giving it to jaehyun yourself. your friends already encouraged you about it, that that was the only thing to narrow the gap between you and jaehyun. it was to show that you were still supporting him.

why are you like this y/n? if you like him, you’d do anything to get his attention and forgiveness. why are you doing things to push him away, rather.. why are you forcing yourself to not care when you still do?

you continued to walk with your head low for another hour, troubled in your thoughts as they’ve been bothering you for many months. snap out of it y/n-

*tug*

*scratch*

the hems of your baggy jeans were pulled and torn with minimal, adorable force. it took you a while to process the animal before you. a blue bunny, what’s a bunny doing here- oh.

“sungchan?”

—

he rose from the bushes in front of their house. you stood there awkwardly while he figures to cover his body after the blue hour. “i’m sorry for asking you to bring me home. i get tired from hopping sometimes.” he grabbed a towel that he was hanging by the gate.

“no worries. i-i’ve seen- nevermind.” your voice softened at the latter.

sungchan pursed his lips to refrain himself from smiling since he was there and witnessed when it happened. “come in, i’ll make you some tea. it’s my way of thanks.”

although he was kinder than his brother, probably more mature, he was still young that you could see through his intentions. you knew he wanted some patching up done between you and jaehyun. you hesitated for a while, but since you were there already, might as well try to talk to him—

even if there was a slim chance of making things work.

you sat on the sofa, slightly still and awkward being in the residence. little sips, light breathing and the soft wind from the fan were only heard within the living area. “did my brother cause you a lot of trouble during the camp?” sungchan asked and knowing that you were silent, he knew jaehyun probably did. “how about now?”

“actually, i think i’m the one causing more trouble for him because i feel like i’m not doing anything to help when i said i would.” you sighed as he continued to listen.

“really? i heard from the others you’re helping so much that it changed my brother.. at the least he’s not cranky.” his nose twitched so adorably that you thought it was derived from being a bunny almost his whole life. “also, there’s that envelope-” he paused while realising how your expression caught him off guard.

maybe he shouldn’t have mentioned it, but he wanted you to know he wasn’t spying on you. he made that clear with his silence.

if he saw that back at the restaurant, that only meant he was there for quite some time. you let out a small smile that he was probably there not for you, but to wait for his brother’s friends. instead of bumping into them, he bumped into you.

“oh, that. it.. has a bunch of handwritten letters i’ve compiled when i struggled talking to jaehyun. i just felt that maybe it’s more sincere if i had to apologise.. y’know, eventually.”

he pursed his lips and nodded. “then why not put those words into actual words? like verbal words.” sungchan’s fingers pointed upwards, hinting that jaehyun was up in his room. “for all i know it’s the most sincere thing to do.”

crap, he’s not expressive but he’s so so mature for his age. it made you feel inferior for a moment.

“but before you do that, i have to tell you something that my dad and brother missed out about our curse. why jaehyun-hyung is more pressured than i am.”

(few minutes later)

you slid against the wall while sungchan went out to do grocery shopping. at the other side of the door, in between the thin gap, you could hear soft breathing; jaehyun was on his bed, sleeping in his dog form and it hurt you since time already passed both golden and blue hour, he should’ve transformed like his brother did. instead he laid there as if he didn’t have a care in the world.

meanwhile, jaehyun knew you entered his room. he pretended to be sleeping and expected he wouldn’t know how to act when he gets to face you. he decided to stay as he was.

until you pat then caressed his head.

he didn’t want to settle or give in for the fact you loved golden retrievers. he blamed on the shallow euphroria dogs easily feel. and because he was in his dog form, the anger he held for you disappeared. but at the same time, was your touch out of care or pity? he couldn’t figure it out. then he could hear the beats of your heart, and that made him sit up. your heart was fast. it was worrying. it was—

“why didn’t you tell me the whole story?” your voice wavered in heaving breaths as he finally looked you in the eye. his ears twitched and he faced the door, knowing that sungchan told everything.

jaehyun shook his body and whiskers moved before he telepathically answered you. “believe me i tried. i hate myself for being sensitive and i couldn’t bring to tell you because i got angry. but you have to know that i value trust more than anything.”

“you know what’s ironic?” you sighed, pressing your forehead as pain began to form. “you didn’t trust me first and and we fought because you didn’t do that. and you didn’t trust me enough that you only told me what, like 50 percent of it?”

of course he knew what you referred to.

he was going to tell you the day he visited your cottage at camp. but he didn’t get to, because ten told him news ahead of him that it ruined the purpose to talk to you. it wasn’t that he blamed him, it was due to the fact he wasn’t prepared for something like that. even for something like this.

because there was that prophecy weighing on his shoulders.

“sungchan said that it has to directly come from you, so you better tell me now before our friendship falls out.” you warned and leaned back against the headboard.

currently your friendship was on the line, wobbling on tight ropes. pushing you further away would do no good.

jaehyun sat and his paws were dignified into a comfortable position. his head laid on a cushion pillow, facing towards you. “fine. most of my family turns into wild animals, and they couldn’t control themselves in that other form. their wildlife instincts overpowers their thoughts.” he yawned.

“and it’s different for me and sungchan. when we were born, when we had our first full transformation, they were shocked to know we turn into domestic animals. we’re able to remember, think and live as if we’re still humans. at the end, it’s either of us to stop the curse.”

“so why did your brother mention that you’re the most pressured? why did it only have to be you?” this time you spoke, there was more depth into your feelings if you spoke. as sungchan said, verbally was more sincere. “you could share the burden with him.”

he sighed at the tone of your voice. “isn’t it obvious? the role is immediately passed onto me not because i’m the first born.. it’s because you suddenly could talk to me.. telepathically.”

“yeah and we couldn’t even figure that one out yet.” you scoffed remembering the times you’ve placed your efforts on that matter and now it had gone all to waste. all because you both had that fight.

he read through your eyes and sensed the intention from your words. plus he hated how you delivered it with that certain tone. “i didn’t bring this up just to blame you for my own satisfaction!” he groaned. “i brought it up so that i can apologise! i was wrong, okay?! i should’ve listened to you instead of carelessly listening to ten-”

you refrained yourself from showing any further hurt. recalling it would only make you cry. “well you were manipulated with ten’s assumptions. you believed him more than me. he had proof while i didn’t. i was in the losing end! not like i expected you to change your mind. so can we just.. get this overwith and tell me what the prophecy is?”

he was speechless for a while. you being straight-forward yet in a pained voice was too much for him. he was already softening his feelings for you and you had to tense it all up again. “‘only one could save those who lay under the curse, for they must be in the correct peace of mind and body to break it before it turns for worse.’”

“and the ‘worse’ means you won’t transform back anymore?” you asked, the prophecy already piercing your heart as you waited for more explanation.

“that and..” he trailed off. “..we lose our humanity too. we won’t remember anything. memories erased like a snap of the finger. and we’ll just be.. another animal.”

you pushed yourself to sit up as your heart clenched tight. “jaehyun! why say it now and not before?”

“because! what is there for you to do-”

you squished the dog’s into a wrinkly mess, to the point jaehyun couldn’t see anything. his paws tried to put your arms down, but even clawing was hard for him to do. then he felt you lean forward to hug him. “y/n? what’re you doing?” you didn’t answer.

crap, this is warm. it feels.. nice. embarrassed, he put his thoughts at the back of his mind. “are you doing this out of pity? do i look that helpless-”

what crossed his mind was that you thought he needed a hug and was the only thing you could do. but you proved him wrong, so, so wrong. and why didn’t he realise it sooner in his life?

“you have to treat yourself like someone you love!”

what?

“you have to fill yourself with it! have you been thinking half-heartedly or do things half-assed because you’re different from people? do you not realise there are people who loves you? you trust them so less that you’re not confident into breaking the curse! because you didn’t really try!”

he froze in his stance, like a bullet pierced through his chest with how true your point was. he didn’t know what love was when his mother left the family. he didn’t dare to open up with his dad and brother, not his friends as for so long he didn’t do that one important thing— trust.

jaehyun thought he did that. he had enough encouragement but only to the level of content. he didn’t expect more as what else was there for people cursed like his family? “why are you so worried or do this much for me?”

“because no one actually helped you!” your arms tightened around him. “your friends were occupied into thinking that protecting you and your curse from others was the safest thing to do. it’s not! it just gets you self-conscious, conceited and too comfortable to not to do anything at all!” everything you said knocked down the pillars of his pride. he wasn’t at all living in humility if his friends did ever help.

“y/n we’re nothing more than friends. how could you be pushing yourself onto my problems-”

“i’m one of the people, jaehyun. don’t you get it now? i l-”

as if the phone line got cut off, he couldn’t hear the rest. you appeared like a television who lost its voice, however, somehow he knew what came after that. he didn’t want to admit it, after spending time with you at camp, he realised his heart felt the same.

you were quick to catch on. the golden retriever just stared at you, you couldn’t hear him as well. not even telepathically. jaehyun laid back down, ignored you and went to sleep. you nudged him, he wouldn’t move. you felt a swarm of blame towards him. if only he told you earlier, he wouldn’t be in this state where he was just another dog. mostly you blamed yourself for not taking the initiative first to fix things. you went along with your anger and his waiting game.

where did it get you? to this.

the one second revelation he heard from you and then fell into slumber, he was standing in front of himself, before a mirror. a series of himself switching from human to animal throughout the years. the glass cracked over his face. as if he entered a new world, he had to prepare mentally for what was to come.

instead he awoke like he only passed out from exhaustion. to only see you hugging your legs, head down with soft sobs and hiccups, he reached out for you yet hesitated. he checked the time, the golden hour was to arrive.

“y/n.” he called out in a low voice.

“no.” you mumbled. “i shouldn’t be hearing him.”

“but you really are, though.”

you shot your head up, tears rolling down your cheeks when you felt his touch— his large palms holding yours. he transformed, you had many questions as you thought it was too late.

confused and tired, you stared at him blankly. processing the guy before you took a whole minute to realise jaehyun transformed back. “is.. is this a joke?” you coughed and rubbed your tears. “i saw you faint- i saw how you lost the light in your eyes- i saw-”

he’s blushing. his ears are red.

jaehyun pulled you into an embrace, he caressed your head as if he held a newborn. “the curse broke around the time i realised i lacked self-care. it was the same time you said it too.”

looking back, he didn’t treat himself right since the beginning. he realised he shouldn’t have looked for a solution or someone to love him. he was the someone he was looking for, and should’ve reflected on himself than to rely too much on others.

“you’re still hugging me.” you said, stopping his trail of thoughts. you pat his back quickly and he was holding you tight. “you’re squeezing the oxygen out of me.”

“can’t i hold you longer? you’ve been so helpful even when i pushed you away. now i don’t really want to let go.” jaehyun whispered. he never felt something like this before— this urge to love someone. “what if the curse comes back when you go away?”

you felt your head bursting with temperatures your body was experiencing now. “you really have to let go!” clearing your throat, you tried to shove him away.

“no. don’t be stubborn.”

“don’t be clingy, clingy!”

“you want me to hug you though.”

“i do but- wait no that’s not- i-”

he squeezed your face between his hands. “you love me, don’t you. and you said i’m not loveable.” he teased and goodness his dimples shot you at the heart. you kicked him in the chest yet he leaned forwards, closer than usual. “i can feel your veins beating crazily.”

ah for crying out loud! “jung jaehyun.” you called him with a stern and plain voice. “get off me.”

“tsk i said i wouldn’t-”

“jaehyun you’re naked.”

hm? he pulled himself away from you, looked down and covered his lower body. ah heavens- “i’m sorr-”

a thud was heard by the door. you both turned heads to sleepy sungchan dropping a parcel delivered to jaehyun while holding a toothbrush with his mouth and prominent bed hair. “uh bro, this is-”

“dad! i think hyung’s in his mating season!”

“i’m so not!”

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

because the curse was lifted and jaehyun made it happen, all those who fell under it soon experienced freedom and joy after years of agony and pain and fear. feelings opposite to them showered upon them that morning like spring rain.

you sat in between jaehyun and ten, who haven’t been talking to each since they fought over little things, mainly about you. ten still didn’t believe that you were jaehyun’s girlfriend, because he recalled you guys were not going to mend things.

“so that’s it? it’s so hard to believe. she just hugged you and the curse’s gone? even more so you’re both dating?”

“ten, c’mon dude.” kun brought out his fist to bump yours. “she’ll be hanging with us from now on. you have to stop being a stuck-up.”

ten shrugged in defeat and finally nodded in acceptance. “fine. i’ll let it go. i mean the curse’s broken won’t bother jae anymore.” he turned to you. “i’m sorry y/n. jae and i have been best friends since kindergarten. so it’s kinda a brotherly instinct to protect him. it just comes out.”

“you do seem like the leader of the pack.” you fiddled with jaehyun’s fingers while he draped his arm around you.

“i thought i was the leader?” kun sounded offended, but not entirely.

jaehyun remained quiet. he told everyone what had happened. however, there was still one question left unanswered. what was the telepathy about?

what did it have to do with you and him? he thought about that real hard. were you actually a missing piece in the prophecy or did he misunderstand it? there were a lot of possibilities, a lot of ideas coming up that maybe he figured it wrong. maybe you did contribute to the breaking of the curse-

“ah!” jungwoo exclaimed as flicked the paper back and forth. he proudly showed what he found, putting the pieces together. the paper was moving quickly that the pairs of eyes couldn’t focus or see anything. “i’ve been telling you guys since camp but you wouldn’t listen to me!”

you squinted your hardest to see the words. all you got from the sheet of paper scribbles and connecting lines. the boys started to fight for the so they could read the younger one forcibly shoved in front of their faces.

jungwoo wanted his friends to feel their pride stepped on them, and held on the paper. “read the prophecy again. i’m excited-”

“you being excited about these things is nothing new-” ten yelled, and kun covered his mouth at the loud volume.

“‘only one could save those who lay under the curse, for they must be in the correct peace of mind and body to break it before it turns for worse.’ guys, it’s already hinted in it!” he pointed at the parts he was scribbling on earlier.

he expounded the prophecy was a little misleading. it wasn’t being literal about the right mind and body. they were the results of the having the correct heart, as the two would only be affected greatly if not for the heart.

jungwoo scooted next to you. “y/n, you weren’t only the key to solving it. you were the only person who gave him that push and made him realise he should love himself for who he was. you gave him that peace of mind because you are the heart. as we all know, the mind and body can’t function without the heart.”

“that sounds sweet?” kun blushed even though he wasn’t supposed to.

“yeah sure but the telepathy happening at the same time with my curse was just a coincidence though?” jaehyun asked.

“onto my next point!” jungwoo drew on the paper again. “i realised you told us before that only family members of the same curse can talk to each other telepathically.”

jaehyun’s brows only furrowed narrower. “which doesn’t make sense because she’s not part of my family.”

jungwoo grinned widely, it almost made you nervous but if it was coming from jungwoo, it always had to be something good. “not even us lads can even talk to you with our minds though we’re close like brothers. what if it’s a sign that she will be part of your family? even if the curse’s broken, it still proves my point that you were soulmates all along.”

somehow you knew it was headed to this. what jungwoo’s saying was similar to your hunch. you weren’t confident as he was because at the time, the curse wasn’t lifted. now that it was, you never knew you were actually right.

jaehyun shrunk in his seat after hearing jungwoo’s theory. he looked at you; who was now giggling with the others. he never thought you were his soulmate, it never crossed his mind. you appeared in his life as a shadow at first, before you resurfaced and made it a roller coaster ride. it was an eye opener for him too, you loved him for who he was, his flaws— that being the curse. although there were frequent bickers, that didn’t mean he didn’t enjoy or hate them. he was afraid you’d leave after knowing his transformation.

you didn’t. you stayed. not because you were forced to just to keep his secret, you stayed since you said you’d help. and that lifted weight off of his shoulders. colours came into view more spirited, clouded thoughts in his head faded and everything he heard that were once muffled became clear. he had to compare it like he was reborn.

in the end, you were still beside him, adjacent to him.

[lilith-of-rivia]

The Bard’s Sister  Geralt XFeamle!Reader Part 3

Part 1    Part 2 

Masterlist 

Summary: Its finally your birthday. You not only get a lovely gift from mum and dad but also from your brother and his companion who has taken a very big likening to you. 

Trigger Warnings: Drinking, some cursing

Pairing: Geralt XFemale!Reader Jaskier XSister!Reader

Word Count: 8,979 (I know its a long one XD I fit a lot into one part) 

If you would like to be added to the tag list please let me know!! So sorry this took so long. it was a lot of writing and I knew I wanted to get the party done in one part. the next part will be the beginning of the travels!! Would you guys rather have SMUT in the next part or wait till the part after that? let me know!!! All my love!! -Lilith

Sleep eluded me. After eating the meat pie from the kitchen and a nice hot bath I thought sleep would’ve come much quicker. I was tired, physically and emotionally. I could feel it in my bones but every time I closed my eyes I remembered that my brother would be leaving again in a few days. I had three more days with him but it didn’t feel like enough. Not after all the time we lost. I wanted to ask him to stay with me, but I knew it would be selfish of me. 

Jaskier’s departure also meant Geralt would be leaving too. It was probably for the best… the feeling I have for the witcher shouldn’t exist. They shouldn’t exist, because I was not delusional. I knew the Witcher’s were re-programmed into believing they were not capable of love, that they were loveless monsters, not only incapable of giving love but incapable of receiving love. I didn’t believe any of those tales. I had studied the trails Witcher’s must go through to become what they are. 

It is disturbing. They break young men’s wills. Make them believe the world will never offer them love, all to fuel their agenda. Witcher's never go through anything that makes them incapable of love. It’s very evident in my brother’s relationship with the witcher. Had Geralt not been capable of feeling “human” emotions, he would’ve left Jaskier to die when he was attacked by the Djinn. It was a perfect way for him to get rid of my brother, it wasn’t technically his fault or his doing. My brother could’ve died and he could’ve washed his hands clean of him. 

The way he kissed my hand the first day we met, was like he was attempting to give his best first impression. He tried his best to show respect, maybe so my mother and father would like him more. He showed me kindness, tenderness. Any time he touched me was feather-soft. Maybe he was worried he’d hurt me or scare me away...

The way he kissed Hildi’s hand. The way he smiled at my brother’s stupid jokes. There was so much more to him than anyone realized. 

I stood from my bed walking over to my desk. I sat down and lit the lantern with the candle from my bed. The fire in the corner of my room didn’t provide nearly enough light to reach me. I grabbed my journal and some charcoal. I moved over to the large windows and sat down. The glass was cold under my touch, the moon was nearly full. It lit up the garden below me. It was the most perfect view of the gardens my mother spent so much time tending. The light blue hue cascaded along the hedges. The flowers dimly lit. I scribbled down the date in my journal before I began sketching the view in front of me for what seemed like the 500th time. I always found something new. Tonight was a quick sketch, just of the basics. I was hoping it would make me sleep but nothing seemed to work. 

My body was smothered in quilts, my arm draped lazily over my head as I tried my best to sleep. The thin nightgown I wore was perfect for warm summer nights. It kept me cool and didn't stick to my body when I sweat.   

The night was still, everything in the walls of the castle was silent. I cul hear the crickets and the frogs below me, but nothing else. 

Squeak squeak 

My eyes snapped open, my heart beating rather quick at the sudden sound from the room behind my head. It took me a minute to remember that Geralt was sleeping next door. I had heard him go to bed hours ago and it had been completely silent since. But now I could hear him moving over and over in his bed. 

“Geralt…” My voice was barely above a whisper. No one could hear me, no one but a witcher's ears. If he was awake I knew he could hear me. 

“...if...if you’re awake, tap the wall twice.” I held my breath waiting for a moment. My cheeks turning red in embarrassment. 

Tap Tap

I smiled at the small sound signaling to me he was awake. 

“I can not sleep...care to take a walk?... Tap twice for yes.” I wondered if he could hear the smile through my voice. 

Tap Tap

I smiled wider, getting up from my bed. I grabbed a candle from my nightstand after throwing on my silk robe. It wasn’t the warmest fabric in the world but the summer air wasn’t too cold. 

I quietly tiptoed to the door, opening it slowly to not let it creak. There on the other side was Geralt. His hair was no longer pulled back in a tie out of his face, no it was messily about his head, some small knots in the thicker areas. Small strands stuck up everywhere. His eyes were hooded a little in sleep. He had a small smile on his lips, his hands tucked into his underarms as he waited for me. He reached out, taking the candle from me before offering me his free arm. 

“Princess…” he greeted with a small cheesy bow of his head. I giggled, softly shaking my head. My hand gripped around his bicep, squeezing it softly. It was as hard as a rock, my hand barely made it halfway around it.

“Hello, Geralt,” I whispered and he smiled. We began walking down the corridor, the hall dimly lit by the moonlight and the few candles lit. 

“No sleep?” He asked.

“No...my mind won't stop wondering…” we walked down the stairs, slowly as to not let the guards know anyone was awake. 

“Care to tell me why, dove?” He whispered. His arm moved slightly, making me let go almost immediately. Before my hand reached my side his fingers laced in between my own, squeezing it. I could feel the warmth in my cheeks, the small act making my heart melt. 

“Walk through the garden with me?” I whispered leaning in a little closer to him. He made me feel safe. Not that I didn't feel safe in my home, I knew how safe I was compared to many others but he just made me feel a type of safe I'd never felt. 

“Of course, lead the way.” we continued down the hall, walking towards the gardens. 

As we veered a corner Geralt's arm quickly wrapped around my waist as he silently, and quickly tucked us behind a suit of armor in the corner. His arm squeezed around my waist. I could feel his breath in my ear. It sent shivers down my spine making me twitch slightly. He chuckled lowly, his thumb stroking my stomach. 

“Do I scare you?” his whisper was low, very close to my ear.

“Never,” I said with no hesitation. My head turned towards him, his eyes shining in the dark. He gently put his finger to my lips. 

“Shhh.” I nodded my head, our eye contact not breaking. His fingers softly traced my jawline, moving till he was cupping my cheek. He broke eye contact for a second as his eyes flicked to the hall we just exited. Not a second after he looked me in the eyes again I could hear footsteps. They were walking down the hall towards us. Geralt took a breath in. After a minute the person was gone. Geralt’s hand was still on my cheek and the other hand wrapped around my waist. 

“You are so beautiful.” My throat went dry. My hands started to get clammy. 

Everything in my body urged me to just grab his face and kiss him, but that small voice kept me back. My fear overtaking the decision. I gently grabbed his hand that was on my face, leaning into him. I kissed his wrist softly. His skin was so warm, warmer than the average man for sure. I wanted to hold him. Feel his skin on mine.

“So are you,” I whispered. His eyes practically rolled out of his head as he smirked like I just made some lude joke. He grabbed my hand and led me to the hallway and out the door to the garden. The moon was bright. 

Geralt started to walk in front of me, pulling me deeper into the garden. Soon we were surrounded by my mother’s Roses and lavender bushes. The smell was intoxicating. It was the center of the garden. Geralt grabbed my waist again. Pulling me closer to him. I was shivering slightly. The air was cold from the late-night rain we had. Colder than I thought it would be. My hands Gently went to his chest, softly pulling and toying with the strings on his tunic. 

“You are beautiful Geralt. I wouldn't joke about that.” My voice was no longer a whisper, it was still low but he could hear me better. 

“I have been called many things in my day dove, but never beautiful.” His arms were tighter around me, his shoulders were tense. He was more alert outside than he was inside, I understood. His training not wanting him to think anywhere is safe. 

“If you want, I’ll make sure to call you that more often.” He chuckled softly at my words. I couldn't help but feel angry, not at him but at the world. The way they treated him, his kind for things they all don’t deserve. My hands went to each side of his face, as I gently made him look at me. 

“Geralt you are so much more than this world will ever give you credit for...I can never say I understand what it feels like to live in your skin, but I can tell you that you do not deserve that cruelty that is thrown your way. I know not all witchers are like you, I know many of them live up to the expectations my kind has put on you. But you do not. You are far from a monster Geralt of Rivia. You-'' one hand rested on his chest above his slow beating heart “-you have a heart of gold. And I’m so sorry you've never been treated with the love and care you deserve and need.” his hand was now covering my own over his heart. His other arm is still tight around my waist. My face and his had drafted closer as I spoke, he leaned forward, pressing our foreheads together.

“Fuck…. (Y/N)...I’m not good with words. But - I, uh thank you…” his voice was so deep it made it hard to focus. His cheeks were light pink. His eyes flashing from my lips to my eyes. I couldn't help but giggle at how frazzled he got over words he deserved to be told. My heart yearned for his touch. Everything he touched was like a small fire deep inside me. I had courted many men in my life. Many I thought would be my endgame, but none ever made me feel the way he did. His lip inched closer to my own, slowly before they were centimeters apart. He wouldn't kiss me without permission. 

“You may kiss me Ger-” his lips were on mine before I could finish my sentence.

 My arms wrapped around his neck, his own wrapping tighter around me nearly lifting me off my feet. 

Our lips moved together slowly, softly. I could feel every inch of his body pressed to my own. All my thoughts were him only. His intoxicating scent was filling my nose as I breathed slowly. He smelt of sandalwood, maybe a little bit of mint. Nothing I'd ever smelled before. The way his hands held my back, softly running up and down the silk of my robe. Everything he touched felt like a new fire was spreading. His lips were sweet, of honey. They were surprisingly soft. They made me feel like molten hot lava. My hand gently combed through his hair. His teeth softly nipped my bottom lip before his tongue infiltrated my mouth. Our tongues danced together, our hands wondering, touching, feeling every inch. The world around me didn't feel real. My body was in the garden but my head was in the clouds. 

He pulled away from me, barely. The loss of contact made me whine softly. I felt colder without his lips on mine. His hot breath fanned my face as he breathed in and out. I opened my eyes, looking into his. His hands left my back moving to my face, his forehead back on mine. 

“You are intoxicating, princess.” His words were velvet. They made my insides turn in the most delicious way. My body yearned for him. His fingers delicately traced the frame of my face. 

“What’s going on in that pretty little head of yours?” I leaned into his hand. The warmth of his palm being a decent replacement for his lips. 

“Jaskier will leave soon...Three days from now.” his hand left my cheek, wrapping around my body, gently turning me so my back was to his chest. His arms circled my waist as he held me into him. His chin rested on my shoulder as he listened. 

“When Jaskier leaves, you'll leave too...and I'll be alone again.” The thought of them leaving made my stomach ache. I had been alone most of my life. Yes I had my parents and they were great, but they were not my brother. 

“All of my friends I grew up with are mothers now. They have lives of their own. My mother and father cannot be my friends, they are my parents. It's nothing the same. I never realized how much I missed Jaskier till he came back.” My throat tightened as I spoke, the feeling of my tears burning my eyes becoming more overwhelming. My hands went to his around my waist as I held them closer to me if it was possible.

“I don't want to be alone again…” The tears slipped freely down my face, my head dropping. 

“I sometimes wish he never left. I know that is selfish of me, but I miss him so much. Sometimes it takes months for me to get the letters he sends me. I never know if he is alive or not.” My crying became a little more intense as I spoke. My voice wavering. I Let go of his hands, covering my face with my hands as I rubbed away the tears vigorously. I hated crying in front of people, it showed weakness, made me vulnerable. 

“I’m sorry, I didn't mean to put you in this awkward situation,” I whispered. One of his arms left my waist, only to wrap around my shoulders, pulling me tighter into his chest. 

“Do not apologize princess…” His lips met my temple in a soft kiss. His lips lingered there for a minute. 

“Who have you been training with?” He asked. I couldn't tell if he was trying to change the subject because he wanted me to stop crying or if he didn't know how to deal with me crying. 

“You may know him, I'm not sure. He never spoke of anyone from his past. He’s a retired witcher. He stumbled into our kingdom when I was 15. My mother and father were scared of a looming war between my country and Lyria. One of my uncles had knocked up the king's younger daughter. A large threat was over my head for a couple of years. So they asked him when he came into our country if he would train me. So I could take care of myself if I was to leave under a new identity. For the last ten years he came for a couple of months, we started with book training rather dull if I do say-” I chuckled at the memory of how many times I fell asleep reading the dull books he would bring with him. “We gradually moved into combat training. I know he didn't train me nearly as hard as he had trained the witchers in his court. But there were days I felt like my limbs would fall off, but last year he told my parents that he was confident that I would not only be able to live on my own in the world, but he was confident I would thrive. His name is Vesemir. He’s due to show up for our training any day now.” Geralt’s eyes were looking at me when I turned to see him. He was smirking softly. 

“What?” 

“Vesemir was my instructor at Kaer Morhen. I’m the witcher I am today because of his training.” My eyes must have bulged out of my head. He laughed at me making my cheeks flush red. 

“You are telling me, I’ve been trained by the same man who trained you? And he never bothered to tell me? What a jerk.” I turned my body around in Geralt’s arms, my head now laying on his chest, my arms around his waist resting on his back. He was much, much, taller than me. 

“Vesemir has always respected my privacy, don't harp on the old man too much.” His heartbeat was distracting me. It was much slower than mine. It was like a lullaby. My hand covered my mouth as I yawned, his head tilting down as he looked at me. 

“Common, you have to sleep. You've got a big day tomorrow.” He was talking about my party. His hands gently pulled me back from him, his fingers laced with mine as he led me back through the garden into the castle and down to my room. 

We stood outside the door, his hands mindlessly fidgeting with my robe. 

“Stay with me tonight?” My hands pressed softly to his chest. 

“I don't know princess...I don't want your parents to get the wrong idea of me.” I nodded my head, understanding and respecting his wishes. 

“Will you be my date to my party tomorrow?” I asked timidly, my eyes focused on his silver pendant.

“I would be honored, Princess (Y/N).” His fingers hooked under my chin tilting my head up so my eyes met his own. 

“Jaskier has your clothes, the party starts at noon.” He nodded his head. 

“I'll be here waiting for you, little dove.” his lips pressed to mine. It was the softest sweetest kiss I had ever shared. It wasn't long, only a few seconds. His hand reached behind me as he opened my bedroom door for me. I leaned up, kissing his cheek softly. 

“Good night Geralt.” I backed up till I was through the threshold of the door, my eyes not leaving him. My hand went to the door. 

“Goodnight (Y/N).” I smiled and closed the door softly. My forehead gently leaning on it. My heart raced faster than it ever had. I wanted him back with me and he hadn't even been behind the door for a minute. 

I moved to my bed, hanging my robe on the wooden bedpost before climbing under the warm comforters. They were not nearly as warm as he was but they would do. 

Tap Tap 

A smile stretched across my face. My knuckles softly tapping against the wall in goodnight. As I drifted into sleep finally, Geralt was only on my mind.

“Princess (Y/N)...” The sound of someone's voice broke my sleep. My eyes fluttered open, the sun burning them as it shone brightly through my window. 

“Princess…” There was a small knock on the door. I couldn't tell who was at the door. I sat up in bed, the quilt bunched at my hips. I rubbed my eyes messily, moving my hair from my face. 

“Yes yes, please come in,” I called my voice hoarse from the lack of water throughout the night. The door opened and Fesca and Neshe entered. They were women who worked in our court. My father and mother never believed in having unpaid servants. 

No one in my family did. Before my great-great-grandfather founded and rebuilt our kingdom my family lived in incredible poverty. Many of my late family died of famines and illnesses due to not having money or food. When my father took the throne he made sure to keep the rule alive. We had many workers in the castle. But they were all paid and had housing courtesy of my father and mother.

Behind the two women, their daughters followed. They were much younger than me, barely 18.  

“How did you sleep, my dear?” Neshe asked a sweet smile on her lips as she moved to the curtains, drawing them closed. My feet met the hard cold floor as I stood and stretched my muscles. 

“Very well thank you,” I said with a smile. The four women walked around my room, Neshe was getting my dress ready, while Fesca and her daughter were preparing items for a bath. 

“Here you go, miss.” Ari, Fesca’s daughter said with a smile as she put down a tray of food at my vanity. 

“What time is it?” I asked as I moved to the vanity, examining the plate full of fruits and a muffin. 

“Nearly ten, miss,” Ari said as she made my bed. 

“You don't have to do that,” I said looking back at her, smiling. 

“I know.” She said back with a smile. 

“Your mother instructed us to tell you that you are not allowed to leave your room until the party this afternoon,” Neshe said as she started to boil water over the fire for the bath. 

“Knock knock!” My head turned to the door, it was Jaskier’s voice. 

“Come in,” I called and the door burst open. Jaskier was standing in the doorway with a huge grin across his face. He was carrying a large bundle of flowers. All types from roses to tulips. 

He walked over to me, setting the flowers on my bed before hugging me tightly. My arms wrapped around his waist, my head resting on his lower chest. 

“Happy birthday baby sister,” he whispered into my ear. I smiled and squeezed him tighter. 

“Thank you, Jaskier. Thank you for being here.” He stepped back from me, looking back to the door. 

“Geralt common!” He called, my cheeks heated a little as he entered. He was wearing what he was last night. Part of me felt like it was all a dream, everything from his hand on mine to his kiss. Our eyes met and he smiled at me, winking softly. He too was carrying a large bundle of flowers. 

“Oh gods Jaskier you didn’t have to get so many,” I said with a laugh as Geralt placed them on my bed next to the ones from Jaskier. 

“Oh but I do, little sister. There are enough flowers in each bouquet for every birthday I’ve missed.” I smiled up at him, my heart swelling. 

“Thank you, Jax”  

“Eat.” Neshe nudged me as she began pulling hairpins and brooches out of my vanity. I grabbed the muffin and took a bite, Jaskier pulling my desk chair over so he was sitting in front of me. Geralt sitting on my bed. Neshe started detangling my bed head, separating and pinning sections back as she started on the intricate style she had thought of for the day. 

“You washed your hair recently, correct?” She asked as she handed me a glass of orange juice. 

“Yes ma’am,” I said with a smile before drinking the juice and setting the empty glass down. 

“You are such a compliant princess.” Jaskier snickered. 

“Much more than you were as a young child Jaskier. You gave me hell every single day.” Neshe said behind me. 

“I respect them, Jaskier. They look out for me.” I said with a roll of my eyes finishing the muffin and grabbing the bowl of fruit and the fork. Jaskier reached overtaking a strawberry and plopping it into his mouth. 

“Rude,” I mumbled under my breath as I ate the fruit. Neshe continued working on my hair as I finished eating, the other three women walking around my room, tightening up and getting the bathroom ready, the tub is filled with boiling water. Many different oils and flowers added, the room soon smelling fresh and fragrant. 

“Knock knock.” My eyes flew to the door that had opened slightly.

There stood a man, not as tall as Geralt but very close. His hair was a white silver, but much shorter, straight too. It was pinned further back. His face was much older than Geralt’s, not only with wrinkles but scars. His build was large, he was a very intimidating man. But what Witcher isn’t. 

“Vesemir!” I quickly moved from Nashe’s hands, walking over to where he was standing a bright grin on his face. He quickly engulfed me in a hug.

“How are you kid?” He asked, pulling back from me, eyes searching my face. 

“I’m wonderful, I’m so happy you're back,” I said smiling brightly. I looked at him but his eyes were over on the other witcher in the room, who was now standing. 

“Well well, look what the cat dragged in,” Vesemir said with a deep laugh. He gently let go of my shoulders walking over to Geralt who was smiling back. 

“Could say the same for you old man.” They shook hands, before hugging each other very quickly. My brother stood up and looked from me to Vesemir.

“Jaskier! So good to see you again.” Vesemir said. 

“How do you know my baby sister?” Jaskier said, looking confused. 

“He’s the one I’ve been training with, Jaskier. Father and mother love him.” Jaskier let out a frustrated breath pacing slightly.

“So you mean to tell me you've been seeing my baby sister for years and never once thought it was important information to share with me??” Jaskier’s voice was getting louder and shrill.

I walked over to him gently putting my hand on his arm. 

“Jaskier he was doing it to protect me and you. He wasn't allowed to tell anyone outside of these walls what we did when he came here. Father and mother made those rules. Don’t be mad at him for following the rules. Just as he did with you and Geralt. I had no idea-” Nashe’s hands were on my shoulders leading me back over so I was seated, her fingers working gracefully in my hair. “I had no idea he had trained Geralt until last night. He never told me because he respected Geralt and his privacy.” Jaskier sighed, nodding his head. His calm demeanor only lasted a minute before he looked at me and his eyebrows furrowed together.

“Wait, last night? When last night? When were you alone with him??” Jaskier turned his attention to Geralt, his hands on his hips like a tutting mother. I bit my lip gently looking away from him. Fesca came over clapping her hands together with a smile on her face. 

“Okay gentleman, I'm going to ask you all to leave. We need to get her ready for the party. You can continue this reunion later.” Jaskier huffed frustrated before walking out of the room, leaving Geralt and Vesemir. They both looked at each other then at me, Vesemir smirking at me. 

“Here you go, the first part of ya gift.” He handed me a book. 

‘A Mage’s Guide to Healing’ 

“What is this? I'm no mage.” Vesemir smirked. 

“You do not know everything Miss (Y/N). You may find it useful. ” With that, he turned and walked out of the room. 

Geralt turned to me and smiled. He knelt in front of me so his eyes were level with mine, his hands grabbing mine. He gently kissed my knuckles. My stomach erupted in butterflies.

“You might need to talk to Jaskier before I do,” I said. He chuckled softly, our eyes meeting. 

“What shall I tell him?” His thumbs stroked the back of my hands. 

I shook my head forgetting Fesca was still working on my hair causing her to grunt in frustration, her hands holding the sides of my head so I sat still. 

“My dear, if you want me to finish this so you can enjoy the company of the Wolf this evening, you need to sit still.” I smiled bashfully, glancing down at my hands with my eyes. 

“Sorry, Fes…” I mumbled. 

“I'm not sure what to tell him. Maybe you should decide.” Geralt nodded in agreement. He stood up slightly, leaning over and kissing my forehead softly. I could hear the women behind me ooing quietly. 

“I’ll see you in a couple of hours, dove.” I smiled up at him, squeezing his hands gently. 

“Okay, Geralt. Maybe tell him outside.” He laughed softly walking to the door, his hand on the doorknob. 

“Okay, dove.”

Once the door was shut Neshe appeared in front of me, she had a smirk on her face. 

“You and the witcher my dear?” She sat in the chair Jaskier was in. Ari and Yennaa were behind me helping Fesca with my hair.

“There isn't anything other than what you saw. He cares for me, but we all know he can't care for me in the way I wish he could.” I said looking over the book in my lap. 

“I don't know (Y/N)… the way he looked at you is how my pa looks at mum,” Yennaa commented. Her mother and father had been together longer than my mum and dad. The connection between how Geralt looked at me to how her father looked at her mum made my heart sore. 

“I...I hope so...He makes me feel things no other man has.” 

Fresca gently squeezed my shoulders, sliding a silk bonnet over my hair, tying it behind my head. 

“Alright dear get in the bath, wash yourself up and we'll be back to help with your dress and makeup.” I nodded and thanked them as they left the room. I undressed quickly, before sinking into the hot bubbly water. 

____________________________________________________________________________

“You look beautiful my dear. You wait here to get your mother and father.” I smiled brightly at Neshe and the other women.

“Thank you. And thank you so much for your help. "They smiled and left me alone in front of the mirror 

The dress was so beautiful. 

Hildi had completely outdone herself this year. The dress was dazzling baby pink, with hundreds of stars stitched into a beautiful mesh fabric. It had sleeves but they did not come up my arms. Instead, the sleeves came right above my elbows. My décolleté and shoulders bare, showing off my breasts a bit more than I normally did but I had never felt more beautiful. Fesca had outdone herself on my hair, every pin was perfectly placed, every curl held beautifully. My crown was dazzling in the noon sun, sending rainbows around my room as it sat gracefully on my head. My attention was turned to the small knock on the door. In stepped my mum and dad. My mum's hand went over her mouth with a small gasp. 

“Oh my goodness. My baby girl is a grown woman. You look absolutely beautiful my love.” She came to me, hugging me into her tightly. My arms wrapped around her shoulders tightly. Her fingers stroked my back softly. I inhaled her scent, snuggling my face into her maroon dress. Her hugs were like none I'd ever had. They were everything I needed some nights... 

“I love you, mum…” She pulled me back from her and looked me in the eye, her fingers stroking my face. 

“I love you more than you will ever know.  Now, your father has a gift for you.” My eyes went to him. He was dressed in a solid green velvet suit, a white button-down under his fest. He looked dashing. I smiled at him as he walked over to us, a small box in his hand. 

“This is something I had made for you when you were born. We both wanted to wait till you were older to give it to you. I think now is a perfect time.” He handed me the box with a smile. I gently took the box and opened it. 

“Dad….” It took my breath away. A beautiful ring was in the center of the box, gleaming in the sun. 

There was an opal stone in the center, two little gold moons on each side of the opal, that symbolize a full moon. There were six diamonds embedded into the ring. Three on the top, three on the bottom. Everything had been placed on a gold band. I looked at my father, his eyes were welling with tears. 

“You've always been my little girl, and no matter where you go or where I go, I never want you to forget how much I love you.” My arms wrapped tightly around him as I practically threw myself on him, tears slipping down my face. I felt my mother’s hand on my back as she hugged us. 

“Jaskier you can come in now.” My mother called out. I could hear the door open, then soon my brother's arms were wrapped around my mother and me. All four of us were back together again. 

“Happy birthday Little Pea.” My dad whispered with a small chuckle. Jaskier laughed in my ear, making me laugh softly. The nickname my brother called me for many years had been forgotten after he left. No one else is using it. 

“I love you all.” My dad pulled me from his chest, whipping my face before grabbing the ring and putting it on my right ring finger. 

“Okay we’ll leave you with your brother to go great with your guests. Don't be too long.” My mother said, booping my nose. I laughed softly nodding. 

The two of them left the room, leaving just Jaskier and me. He turned to me, looking me up and down before bringing me into another bone-crushing hug. 

“I'm so happy you're home Jax…” I whispered into his black velvet tunic. He too looked quite dashing. His shirt was tucked into some dark blue trousers a black leather belt holding them up, and some very nicely polished black boots up his legs. His hair was curly and his smile was bright. 

“I missed you so much, Little Pea.” He pulled back and rubbed the back of his neck. 

“So Geralt spoke to me earlier today.” I could feel the heat rising to my cheeks and ears. 

“About…?” 

“He told me about the kiss last night, told me he didn't want to hurt you. I told him he had to talk to mum and dad, not me.” I groaned and pinched the bridge of my nose. 

“Jaskier, it's not that serious. Why would you tell him that it's not-”

“He already did it love. They gave their blessing.” 

“I...they did? For what?” 

“To court you of course!” He said with a laugh. 

“But you'll both leave soon-”

“Don't overthink it, common he's waiting outside.” He walked to the door opening it. Sure enough, there was Geralt. He was breathtakingly beautiful. He was dressed head to toe in black velvet, his hair clean and combed, pinned back, his face freshly shaved, a small rose pinned into his shirt. The first three buttons of the shirt were undone, revealing his deliciously hairy chest and his silver pendant. 

Breath.

I took a deep breath, my eyes looking him up and down taking him in. It wasn't until we met eyes I realized he was doing the same to me. 

“You look beautiful.” He breathed out, walking towards me. I reached my hands out to him, he gently took them pulling me into him, his left arm looping around my waist. Our faces inches apart. 

“You look so handsome Geralt. You clean up quite well. Black velvet is your style.” I said with a smile, my hand on his shoulder, the other still in his hand. He leaned down and softly kissed me. It was short and sweet. Yet it filled my body with warmth and butterflies. I was sure he felt the temperature of my skin change. 

“Common people are waiting for you, princess.” He whispered as he pulled away, my hand wrapping around his bicep. I looked at him as we walk down the hall towards the grand hall. 

“You are a breathtaking creature (Y/N). I do not think I have seen anyone so beautiful in my 87 years.” My heart raced in my chest as he spoke, my hand gripping his arm a little tighter. 

“No one told me I was falling for an old man.” I joked as we approached the door to the great hall. One of my father’s soldiers was waiting for us. 

“Princess.” He said with a soft bow of his head. I smiled softly at him, curtsying to him softly. 

“Derlor, it’s good to see you again.” I let go of Geralt’s arm, stepping towards Derlor hugging him gently. He was my father’s right-hand man, everything my father needed he went to Derlor. He had been working in my father’s court for nearly 30 years. 

“This will be the first birthday that I don’t get to escort you. I’m not sure what to do with myself.” I smiled and shook my head. 

“Relax, enjoy yourself. Maybe ask Hildi for a dance. You know she has a soft spot for you.” I said stepping back to Geralt’s side, my hand on his arm again. Derlor looked at the witcher next to me, eyed him up and down before stepping in front of him. 

“I know her parents like you, and I trust their judgment but understand one thing Witcher; if you hurt her in any way I will kill you. You may be a feared monster slayer but you do not scare me.” I rolled my eyes softly, everyone was going to threaten the witcher on my behalf. Flattering but annoying nonetheless. 

“If I hurt her. I will gladly lay down my blade and let you do your worst, sir.” Derlor smiled. 

“Good. Now time for your entrance princess.” He walked to the door pushing it open. I could hear the people quiet down. Geralt leaned down and kissed my cheek quickly, leaving the spot hot in his wake. Derlor stood at the end of the red rug in the center of the room. He cleared his throat. 

“Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome the lady of the hour, Princess (Y/N)!” Geralt and I started walking down the center of the carpet. On either side were people from all over our kingdom. Many nobles I had known for years. I smiled at the familiar faces, as we continued walking to where my mother, father, and Jaskier. 

“As many of you know, we have been preparing our daughter to take over for us one day-“ My father said, stepping forward, taking my hand from Geralt and smiling at me. 

“But seeing as myself and my wife are in great health and nowhere near the end of our reign. And as you can all see our son has returned from his many great travels.” Vesimer walked forwards, a smile on his face and a pack in his hands. 

“Your mother and I both think you are ready my dear,” Father said looking me in the eyes. 

“Ready for what dad…?” I whispered, my voice wavering slightly, my stomach flipping and swelling. His eyes drifted behind me, looking at who I guessed was Geralt. 

“You will be leaving the kingdom for a while.” My mouth ran dry, my eyes going to Jaskier who was beaming. 

“We know that you will be in good hands, not that you need it. You will be leaving with Jaskier and Geralt and traveling the Continent to your heart’s content.” My hands squeezed into his harder as he spoke, my eyes burning with tears, my eyes bouncing between him, Jaskier, and my mother who was also near tears. 

“You need to see the world, see what you can help improve on when you take over. Meet people, taste danger a little.” My arms wrapped around his neck, hugging him tightly, my eyes closed the tears of joy slipping down my face. 

“Thank you, dad…” I whispered and he chucked. He pulled me back and Jaskier came and stood in front of me. 

“I've missed so much of your life, and I regret it so much. You have turned into such a wonderful young woman and it would be an honor if you joined us in our travels.” I could feel Geralt’s hand on my back as he stood next to me as I looked at Jaskier. My eyes gleaned at him, searching his facial features for any hesitation in the offer. 

“You’re both serious?” I asked. 

“Vesemir is very admin that you would be beneficial to me, in more ways then.” Geralt said with a small wink. 

“So what do you say, do you want to come with us?” Jaskier asked, his hands holding mine. 

“What a stupid question Jaskier! Of course, I want to!” The smile on my face nearly hurt, I had never been so happy in my life. I didn't have to say goodbye to Jaskier or Geralt, not for a while anyway. Jaskier grabbed me, pulling me into a bone-crushing hug which I gladly returned. 

“Everyone please, enjoy yourself! Food will be brought out soon!! Ale. wine and mead are already out! We thank you all so much for coming to celebrate our daughter’s birthday!” My father said to the room full of people who all clapped and cheered. 

I turned away from Jaskier to Geralt who was still standing next to me. I put my hands on his chest gently leaning into him, his hands going to my waist. 

“Are you sure you're okay with me coming along? I would hate to be a burden on you.” Geralt shook his head, smiling softly, his fingers stroking a stray strand of hair behind my ear.

“From what Vesemir told me today, you will only be an asset to me and my travels. Unlike your brother who just annoys me.” I laughed softly, rolling my eyes. 

“You love him,” I said with a smile. He huffed, taking my hand in his leading me to our spot at the table. 

“If you didn’t you would have never followed him for weeks to an unknown country to meet a sister you had no idea existed. Face it witcher, my brother has weaseled his way into that heart of yours.” He was filling his plate with food and a smile on the corner of his lips as he listened to me. 

He handed me the plate of food I thought he was preparing for himself. 

“Thank you, love,” I said as I took the plate from him, watching as he got some for himself. The people around us talking, laughing, and beginning the party that would surely last into the night. He leaned over, kissing my cheek softly then he started to eat. 

The party had been going for hours. Everyone was a bit drunk including me. The wine in my cup had been the fourth do far, and I'm a lightweight. My body was warm, the sweet taste of the cherry wine lingering on my lips as I listened to my brother sing and play his lute. As the song ended I put the cup down, nearly knocking it over in the process, clapping for Jaskier. 

“Jaskier come here!” I yelled with a slight giggle. He came over to me, his face red as he breathed hard, he too was drunk. 

“Any song requests my lady?” He said with a cheesy bow of his head making me laugh maybe a little too loud. 

“Sing me the song you first wrote for Geralt?” His face lit up as he looked behind me to Geralt who was sitting at the table next to Vesemir. 

“He hates that song (Y/N),” Jaskier said making me laugh more. 

“Oh but he’s never had it sang to him here! Jaskier we love him here. Common the people will sing, children will dance. Maybe hell get some coins tossed at him!” Jaskier laughed with me.

“Okay okay fine, only for you.” Jaskier walked over to the stage with the other bards whispering something to them before yelling over the crowd of people. 

“This song is for my baby sister. I haven’t sung this one in a couple of years, but I think you lot will like it more than anyone I’ve ever sung for!!!” The crowd clapped for him as they all looked at him. I glanced behind me looking at Geralt who knew what song was coming. Our eyes met. I giggles and winked at him. 

“When a humble bard

Graced a ride-along

With Geralt of Rivia

Along came this song” 

The crowd erupted into cheers, the smiles on their faces only growing, including my own. Many children ran into the middle of the room staring up at Jaskier as he sang, eyes gleaming. 

“From when the White Wolf fought

A silver-tongued devil

His army of elves

At his hooves did they revel

They came after me

With masterful deceit

Brokedown my lute

And they kicked in my teeth”

People started singing along to the second verse. The room is filled with slurred, off-tune singing of my people. The warmth spread through my chest as I saw Jaskier’s face light up in a way I had never seen before. His attention went to Geralt momentarily looking at him with the same disbelief. I looked at Geralt to see he held the same expression. His smile was genuine, eyes wide as he listened to the people listen to the song about him. I left my spot from the middle of the room, quickly walking as to not trip in my drunken state. I got to the table in front of Geralt, my smile wide as I extended my hand. 

“Care to dance with me witcher?” He cocked a curious eyebrow at me, probably due to my drunken state. 

“I'm not much of a dancer, Dove.” He said, making me shake my head walking around the table, and grabbing his arm. 

“Neither am I, that's what makes it fun.” He grunted standing, reluctantly following me into the crowd of people who cheered louder for him. 

“Toss a coin to your Witcher

O' Valley of Plenty

O' Valley of Plenty, oh

Toss a coin to Your Witcher

O' Valley of Plenty”

Jaskier and the other bards stopped playing and singing, the crowd in front of him continuing the verse. Myself included. The sound of everyone singing my brother's famed song made my heart sore, everything was perfect. Even Geralt was smiling as he let me dance and spin with his hands, once taking his eyes off my body. 

“You Witcher are a hero here!” I yellow over the music and crowd. He pulled me into him, his lips capturing my own in a very wet, sloppy kiss, impart due to my drunken state. The alcohol coring in my veins made me want to tear his clothes off then and there and let him have his way with me. But I wasn't drunk enough to let it happen. My arms wrapped around his neck as I kissed him back, the music and people drowning out of my ears as I tasted his lips. Everything about him was so intoxicating.  

After a while he pulled back, my lips wet with his salvia, my chest heaving up and down, and my mind racing. I felt dizzy from the kiss. 

“Common let’s get you some fresh air, dove.” He whispered, his arm wrapping around my waist as he led me out of the grant hall and onto a balcony. With one look from Geralt, the two love birds who were already out there left without a word. The cool night air hit my face and made me feel less dizzy. I walked over to the stone wall on the balcony, my hands resting on it, cooling me off more. Geralt's arms wrapped around my waist from behind holding me tightly and close to him. 

“You are a rather drunk princess.” I giggled and nodded. 

“I don't drink very often witcher, it goes straight to my head.” a large yawn interrupted my train of thought. Geralt chuckled and kissed my head. 

“Would you like me to take you to bed?” My eyes felt rather heavy, the winemaking me more sleepy as time progressed. 

“I'm such a  dud, it's not even midnight,” I whined, smacking my hands on the stone softly. Geralt chuckled and ran his hands up and down my arms and shoulders. 

“Common, you don't have to push yourself if you're tired.” Geralt started pulling me back to the door leading into the hallway. 

“Fine. only because you're so nice to me.” I grumbled as he led me down the hall and into my room. He shut the door behind us as I walked over to the vanity, plopping myself down. 

“I hope no one misses me too much. I desperately want out of this dress. It is beautiful but I cannot breathe.” Geralt chuckled from his spot at the door as he watched me attempt to pull the pins and brooches from my hair. I started to get frustrated, my hair being too intricately done for my drunk self. 

Geralt wordlessly walked over to me and gently started to help me pull the pins from my hair. His fingers combed softly thru my hair, scratching my scalp gently as he worked to get them out of my hair. The small action was nearly lulling me to sleep in the chair. I heard a knock at the door which snapped me out of my sleepy state, my back straightening. 

“Yes?” I turned around and saw Jaskier peeking through the door. 

“You vanished, just wanted to check-in.” I smiled sweetly at him. 

“I'm a very drunk Jaskier, I desperately want to sleep.’ He walked into the room and towards me. He was carrying a pitcher of water and a cup. 

“I figured, drink this and-” He pulled out a vial from his pocket and handed it to me.

“-Vesemir gave this to me, says it is the perfect cure for a hangover. Also gave me one.” I smiled and placed the vile on my vanity along with the water and cup. 

“Thank you, Jax.” He smiled and hugged me before turning and leaving to walk out the door, before he did he turned and pointed a finger at Geralt.

“If you decide to do anything dirty with my sister-”

“Jaskier!” I all but shrieked. 

“Just, be quiet my room isn't too far away.” I could feel my face turn bright red, my fists balled at my side as I stood from the chair. 

“I’m going to kill you.” Geralt’s arm wrapped around my waist pulling me back before I could attack my drunk brother. The door was shut and he was laughing down the hall. 

“Such a prick.” I groaned and turned around pouring myself some water and drinking it. I grabbed the vile from the table pulling the cork out. Before it could be brought to my lips Geralt stopped my hand and brought the vile to his nose. He inhaled deeply a few times before realizing my hand, 

“Just had to be sure.” I smiled and drank the contents. The taste was vile.

“Oh my god, that is awful,” I said coughing. Geralt laughed softly at me, tilting his head to the side slightly. 

“Help me unlace my corset?” I turned my back to him. I felt his fingers delicately untied the lace one by one. I took a deep breath, breathing properly again. As the lace was losing the dress started to slip down my body. I quickly caught it before it dropped down my waist. Thankfully my back was to him. I heard him clear his throat. 

“My night slip in on the bed, can you hand it to me?” I heard him move before the slip was in front of me. 

“Could you, uh turn around?” I asked. 

“Of course princess.'' After a minute I turned my head and saw he was facing the other direction. I let the dress fall from my body leaving me all but bare except for my undergarments, I slipped the night slip over my body and gently brushed his back. He turned around and smiled. 

“Stay with me?” I asked softly. 

“Of course dove.” He led me to the bed, pulling the quilts and sheets back allowing me to crawl in. I watched as he discarded his vest, and shirt leaving him in his tight trousers. My eyes wandered all over his scared torso and arms. He was breathtaking. 

“You're staring dove.” He chuckled making me blush, hiding my face in the quilts. 

“Can you blame me?” He laughed softly and walked to the door. 

“Where are you going?” I asked, sitting up slightly. 

“Just to grab something more comfortable to sleep in, Dove.” He walked out the door leaving it open. He returned minutes later, in the same sleep pants he was wearing the night before, less tight. He shut the door and the curtains, walking over to the other side of the bed before getting in. 

He scooped me up, placing me closer to him, my head on his firm chest. I could hear his heartbeat it was slow, soothing. His fingers stroked aimlessly over my body. The last thing I felt before sleep took me was his warm lips on my forehead.

@weallhaveadestiny @ayamenimthiriel @niiight-dreamerrrr @rn7rocks @fire-in-her-veinz @eternallyvenus

[the-evil-authoress]

GX Month Day 1: “Game on!”

It’s Judai/Jaden Yuki’s birthday today! Let’s celebrate!

Precious fluffy boi!

Cross posted on Ao3!

Jaden doesn’t do birthdays.

He has maybe one or two memories of cake and candles and his parents’ faces, a couple more surrounded by friends and presents. After that it’s just a card and present or two left on the dining room table of an empty house.

Christina tries at least. She drags him out of the empty house and over to her place. There’s cake and candles and presents that actually match his interests and off key singing. Her mother cooks his favorite dishes. They duel.

It’s bittersweet, but it’s better than hiding under his blanket with his GameBoy all day.

*

/I’m heading to Yugi’s today. You should come too!/

Biting his lip, Jaden glances at the calendar and wonders if he’s gotten the days mixed up again. But, no, the home screen of the Duel Academy issued PDA proudly proclaims August 31. He looks back at Christina’s message. They hadn’t made any plans which isn’t unusual - Christina usually just shows up to drag him off, so that’s the weird part of this situation.

This is the first time they’ve both had cell phones tho.

He stares at the message, rubbing his thumb against the side of the device, until Winged Kuriboh trills at him to respond instead of sitting here angsting about it.

“Okay, okay- I am not!” Jaden protests.

Winged Kuriboh snorts.

Groaning, Jaden sends his reply.

/maybe/

/3 o’clock! Bring an overnight bag!/

“Are you even listening to me?” Jaden grumbles, but he has to admit to curiosity. This will hardly be his first time at Christina’s cousin’s house, but sleepovers had gotten rarer over the years.

“Oh, fine!” Jaden huffs as Winged Kuriboh headbutts him, tossing off the sheet he’d wrapped himself in to actually get dressed. It’s a little after 1 so he might as well get his stuff and leave now. The train to Domino alone will take an hour.

Ugh. He forgot how much he hated riding this thing alone.

*

The lights in the game shop out front are off, the door locked, so Jaden goes around to the side door and knocks. Muto-san lets him in.

“Judai! Glad you could make it.” The woman smiles warmly as Jaden toes his shoes off. “Christina’s in the living room.”

“Kay.” It’s a fairly mundane exchange. The few times Christina has dragged him over here on this day in the past, the woman nearly squeezed the daylights out of him. It felt like he might break, but he also felt really safe. He’s still confused by the memory but it’s a good one.

Did everyone forget? That’s not possibly, right?

Winged Kuriboh chirps at him again when he stalls too long in the genkan, and Jaden tries not to look like he jumps at nothing but air. “Alright!” he hisses out the side of his mouth and stalks down the short hallway.

Great. He’s in a bad mood now, and he hates dealing with people when he’s in a bad mood. Christina’s okay, but Yugi and Gramps have only seen his sunny side. Why is it so exhausting to be happy all the time?

“SURPRISE!”

Jaden shrieks as he rounds the corner to an explosion of bright colors and popping noises. It takes him what feels like an eternity to realize he’s just been assaulted with confetti by his friends who definitely don’t live in Domino.

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY, JADEN!” they chorus, every single one of them and what the actual fuck how??

“What?” He blinks dumbly at them, confetti dangling in his face and too stunned to even tell a giggling Winged Kuriboh to shut up.

“We came all this way to surprise you!” Alexis beams. Huh, she looks pretty good out of uniform; the kapris are definitely more practical than those stupid skirts.

“It was Christina’s idea!” Syrus declares, the redhead in question practically vibrating where she stands like she’ll explode into confetti herself any moment. It’s been a long time since he’s seen her that excited. “I was so nervous on the train I nearly missed my stop! But it was worth it!”

“Ha! My brother’s got you beat there. This idiot tried to board the wrong train,” Alexis scoffs, slapping the back of her hand against Atticus’s arm.

“Heeey!” the older boy whines, pouting dramatically. “It was an honest mistake!”

“Well, whatever mishaps on the way, we all got here,” Bastion interrupts, standing proud and tall as always, and Jaden might be a tiny bit delusional but he could swear Bastion looks proud of him. “And I can’t think of anywhere I’d rather be. You’re one year older. Congratulations, chap!” Bastion claps him on the shoulder and Jaden’s eyes don’t deceive him; the smartest kid in his grade, if not the whole school, is proud of him for simply turning 16!

Since when are birthdays an accomplishment to be proud of?!

Oh, right, this is the part where Jaden is supposed to smile, not stare at his friends like a dead fish. “R-right!” Did his voice just crack? His face feels creaky and numb. Oh god, is doing the serial killer smile?

“Who wants cake?” a boisterous voice calls, saving Jaden from falling further into panicked thoughts as its owner sweeps out of the kitchen holding a massive cake.

“Chumley?!”

“Yeah, duh! I wouldn’t miss your birthday for the world!” the newly hired card designer declares. “And I got a leave of absence, don’t worry! Apparently Mr. Pegasus is pretty big on the whole family and friends thing.”

Jaden can only gape. Then he notices Chazz lurking behind Chumley, his trademark scowl and dark clothing at total odds with the lopsided, brightly colored party hat someone else must have forced onto his head, and Jaden just loses it. The hysterical giggles bubble up his throat and he’s wheezing before he even understands what’s going on. But he’s...happy? No way, this has gotta be more than just ‘happy’. Jaden doesn’t think he’s felt so much in years!

“C’mere you guys!” He throws himself at them, instigating a group hug as Syrus squeaks and rushes to catch him. He hides the tears in Atticus’ shoulder and laughs instead of sobs. Christina’s hands finds his and he squeezes.

He has to swallow the ache in his throat again, when he sees the mountain of presents on the table.

“We may have gone a bit overboard.” Atticus laughs sheepishly.

“Dad’s gonna murder you when he sees the credit card balance,” Alexis grumbles.

“Oh, posh! Nothing is too big a sacrifice for Jaden’s big day!”

Jaden doesn’t even know what he’s gonna do with all this stuff! They end up building the model Gundam kits together. Jaden’s never had so much fun with those things.

He also gets that soul squeezing hug from Mama Muto.

“Thanks,” he whispers later, sitting on the couch with Christina while their friends argue over a puzzle strewn across the table.

“It wasn’t entirely my idea,” she hums, thumb rubbing his knuckle in a familiar, soothing rhythm. “Syrus wanted to know when your birthday was and pouted when he realized it’d be during summer break. When I told him you weren’t really fond of your birthday anyway, I guess he told Atticus and, well... Atticus got it in his head to throw you the ‘best birthday ever’. Mom doesn’t have enough space for a big party so I asked Yugi if Gramps and Aunty would mind. And here we are.” She smiles at him, so genuine and pure.

His throat aches again. He ignores it.

“Yeah. Best birthday ever.”

[sanoiro]

5x01 - Really Sad Devil Guy - Spoilers & Speculation

  Warning! There is always a possibility that certain scenes might have been mixed up under their non-respective episodes.

I’ll be clear about all this. Do not copy and paste the speculations, If you have found the original accounts from where the bts come from use yours do not get any of the photos from here. This post was NOT written to aid fandom spongers but in order to have fun with some dear friends and as a courtesy to the fans who come across my posts. I’m not a news blog nor a source and I’ll not be treated as such.

Written By: Jason Ning Directed By: Eagle Eglisson

Jason Ning has written/co-written the episodes:

1x03 - The Would-Be Prince of Darkness

1x06 - Favorite Son

2x05 - Weaponizer

2x16 - God Johnson

3x04 - What Would Lucifer Do?

3x11 - City of Angels?

3x14 - My Brother's Keeper

3x20 - The Angel of San Bernardino

4x03 - O, Ye of Little Faith, Father

4x08 - Super Bad Boyfriend

5x01 - Really Sad Devil Guy

Cast: Tom Ellis as Lucifer, Lauren German as Chloe, DB Woodside as Amenadiel, Lesley-Ann Brandt as Maze, Kevin Alejandro as Dan, Scarlett Estevez as Trixie, Rachael Harris as Linda Martin and Aimee Garcia as Ella.

Season 4 Recurring Characters: None Officially Announced Guest Cast:

Erik Aude...Rod

Kelsey Chock...Kirby Jones

Patrick Duke Conboy...Club Guy

Joël Dupont...Lux patron

Mark Elias...Vincent Gill

Chasten Harmon...Megan Garner

Brian Majestic...Neighbor

Sierra Nowak...Emily

Jose Stephan Perez...Club Guy

Behind The Scenes Videos:

5x01 Locations:

1) LUX - Party

2) Precinct

3) The Yacht - Party - Maze (stunt) - Ella - (Ella & Maze) - Mr DOB? Money Lucifer?

4) The House - Night with Lucifer & Maze - Morning with Chloe Detective - Baby Shower - Girl

5) The DTLA Penthouse - Morning Lucifer - Night Chloe Sting  (Green Screen)

Due to the confusing titles we have ended up between friends to retitle them and this one is ‘The Gambler’ episode. The reason behind the name is because the case is taking place mainly in a high profile gambling establishment but also sets forward a very interesting concept for S5. 

Everything is a gamble and you need to be aware of what you are about to throw on the table. In my belief, the cards at our leads hands are misleading and sometimes some of them do not know what the power of the cards they hold. Pity that it’s not a card game though but a through of the dice with many unknown sides to the players. No God does not play dices with the universe as Neil Gaiman explains in Good Omens but how much of what is going on can be blamed on him? Not much in my humble opinion.

As you already know after all these years BTS is not easy on the contrary they are confusing and frustrating to no end… So stay cautious and try to have fun rather than search for definite answers. These answers may come only when the season P1 drops and if I managed to spot something correctly we were fortunate.

The first episode as Ellis said will clarify why Lucifer returned to Earth but unfortunately, we can only speculate as the bts do not give us a definite answer but we know one thing, do not expect Lucifer and Chloe to meet too soon in 5x01. For the most part, it seems like Lucifer tries to avoid her and for a very good reason. As Henderson said you cannot expect to lock an alcoholic to a liquor store for 20 years and do not have a regression.

The beginning of the episode will most probably take us to… Hell. The reason for that speculation is Ellis’ birthday cake. Yes, Ellis is an executive producer and usually, by now 5x01 should have wrapped as an episode its post-production so we assume that that scene takes place in the first 5-10 minutes of the first episode of S1.

If the scene of that cake is not one of the S5 first scenes then probably is a cut scene from Chloe wondering how Lucifer is doing and the answer is well… he is delusional. According to Boris’s speculation we might get a similar scene like the beginning of S4 but this time it’s Chloe who works and the files pile up as well as the boxes around her office... Some bts suggest that might be actually happening but we simply cannot be sure. 

We might also spot Gaudium on that cake but I would assume he appears like that because the delusion has not yet dropped so his real form might be a wonderful CGI. Henderson always wanted him somehow in the show so that would be the perfect time to do so…

So what has caused Lucifer wanting to get to earth? Again we do not know but it might be somehow related to the case Chloe will be working on. Of course, that relationship might not be obvious but more like the case of 5x04 where Lucifer’s connection to the case Chloe was trying to solve was purely accidental due to Eve.

Now the writers did tease that Lucifer will see a familiar face in Hell and many have speculated over that. When I heard it for the first time I thought it was Dan and I still hold that opinion mainly because Dan’s arc is more or less similar to the one of Charlotte. If a character is going to die in S5 I do expect it to be Dan even if it is for a little while, something that will lead to bigger problems later on and perhaps it will be the reason on why he needs the matching bracelet he wears with Lucifer and which appears in 5x03.

If that face is not Dan then who else could it be? Father Frank? In Hell, you may ask? Well, he felt immense guilt over accidentally killing his family and the boy’s family at that car crash so that’s where I place my next bet. In any case that familiar face is probably who shakes up things and causes Lucifer to seek something on Earth. 

My calculations on how long Lucifer is in Hell give out a 6 month period which has been confirmed and my speculation was based on that due to the babies that play Charlie :D. So what has changed 6 months later on Earth?

As we know from Lauren German fools everyone into believing she is doing well and she is supported by Maze and why not Ella. In 5x01 there is a bts which shows Chloe at a LUX party with Maze but Maze is dressed in leather and Chloe in work clothes. In the time of Lucifer’s absence, it was hinted by DB that Amenadiel has taken over LUX but fear not as LUX is the same place it always was and Amenadiel tries to imitate Lucifer’s dressing code and kind of entertainment in the establishment. At the same time if you notice the fridge at Linda’s apartment it has some photos with Amenadiel, Linda and Charlie so the domestic life is going well on that front as well for him.

^If it’s Amenadiel it fits with the rehearsal if not then Lucifer and Chloe reunite earlier but I believe it’s Amenadiel. 

Moving on as you know each episode has a case! Episode 5x01 features many different locations but I’ll start from Maze’s clothes at LUX. We do not know if the LUX scene is early in the episode and I would assume it is not. Maze’s clothes at LUX are seen in two locations LUX and at a boat where she is accompanied by Ella yet that’s not the murder scene.

^That’s the main pattern I saw at LUX day of the extras wearing. 

^Josh’s photo is upside down ;) 

^Just a speculation but does LInda visit LUX? No idea. 

After LUX day which lasted for over 13 hours I believe it lasted in total for about 15-16h... So it’s  big scene. 

^Chloe shot and Lesley Ann waiting to enter the scene

Ella’s shirt is also one of the reasons why I believe that’s at the beginning of the episode as later on, she wears a yellow and then a blue shirt during the episode. 

The murder scene takes place at a downtown Penthouse - not Lucifer’s - which acts as an illegal gambling establishment for rich players. If you have watched the movie Molly’s Game you will get what I mean. So let’s assume that murder happens there, the LAPD investigates the scene but afterwards, when Chloe is at the precinct she turns to Maze for some reason or Maze drags her to LUX. 

Note that Lucifer looks angry perhaps even dejected according to the available bts

^No Green screen so do not expect something supernatural to happen just Lucifer infuriated giving a verbal point of how pointless everything is I presume. 

Now call me a weird but there is a possibility of Ella being at the playing table BEFORE the murder case... or perhaps who could be the last person to see in Hell? Ella even for a fraction of a second? No idea again just a wild speculation...But I do not think that’s it... not entirely at least.. Aimee was well dressed at the following photo there... In my other speculation, Lucifer tries to get people to help him without involving Chloe at all.. Yet note that the dates they were posted on social media were different so we cannot be sure

Now if Ella does help with the case is it too farfetched to hope that she will spill the beans about Candy to Chloe in 5x01? Dad I HOPE SO!. 

Afterwards, we see that Maze and Ella track down a rich guy on a boat. Maze is wearing the same clothes she did at LUX and I would speculate that the yacht belongs to Lee (The yacht is called the Lightbringer and is a known in L.A. yacht to rent for events etc.) with all the money he got OTHERWISE it was Lee who got killed and is the familiar face in hell and a close relative (his son?) took his fortune. You see a young black guy was hired as a guest so it is possible to assume that. There was a script page as well a blurry one but we do not know if the name was Les or Lee.. Here is the thing though... There was also a guy who looked like Jeremiah aka Lee in DTLA but I do not know if it was during the murder -if it happens there which if it does then fitting! or if he was there for his usual encounter with Lucifer...- 

Now about that yacht...

Now at that yacht we have Maze kicking some not so pretty behinds and we do not know how it goes from there unfortunately but I would assume that Lucifer and Maze are reunited early on that episode perhaps around the first quarter or so.

While everything happens Lucifer visits the DTLA Penthouse - Gambling establishment and he seems pissed possibly because his money was the reason Lee was murdered if we support that theory?

From there we also have a location that was shot at the WB ranch, the place where FRIENDS shot their intro scene at the fountain and which was sold by WB yet they can still use it for the time being.

At that ranch, there is a small town set which has some middle-class houses. In one of those houses, there was a baby shower for a baby girl I suppose and is where Lucifer seeks more answers. I do not know if someone bleeds or something but they had to wash the street afterwards. The scene happens at night and Lucifer again is NOT pleased. Along with Lucifer I believe that there was also Maze and I do not know if Maze was also there in the morning shots that follow with Chloe but she had her stunt with her and her presence at the stages suggest that she may have been at the precinct as well with those clothes but that’s a speculation. 

Lucifer’s car at the lot in the main WB lot not the ranch. 

Now do be careful as Chloe's visit in the morning might be before Lucifer’s one at night we just do not know exactly at the moment. 

^You can see Lucifer in the middle of the shot. 

^I believe that’s in that house at night. 

^Maze Lucifer and the Guy?

According to the guest's clothes I suspect that Chloe gets there in the morning and then Lucifer at night as he wears the exact same ones...

At this point my belief is that perhaps Maze helps Chloe, then Lucifer gets involved without Chloe realising he is there or perhaps that’s the point she sees him and Maze along with Lucifer get into a fight. The suspect might have run or perhaps Lucifer and Maze protected Chloe unfortunately we cannot know what exactly is going on. 

A third speculation at the same timeframe is that Maze is reunited with Lucifer at the penthouse and they start working together from that point. The follow Chloe perhaps even save her from the suspect as he runs and then both return at night to confront him. 

Now there is also a morning shooting scene there or perhaps even two as we do know that Chloe as a Detective goes to ask the guy some questions while Lucifer has some action scenes at that point.

Ellis’ and Lesley-Ann’s stunts were there and took care of the scene which needed to be delivered yet, in my opinion, there was no meet up there. I do not know if Chloe managed to take a glimpse of Lucifer or not but I assume that at that point she knows Lucifer is back but he still avoids her to spare her the pain as he probably believes he will have to go back to Hell once his quest finishes.

Fast forward we go to the last part of the episode which takes place at the DTLA Penthouse at night where Chloe appears to be on a sting operation, pretending to be a player and I would also assume that Ella is at the van guiding her through that. At the same time though we have Lucifer and Maze trying to do their own thing and Dan somewhere in the middle.

We know that it’s the final scene as there are police cars at the scene and my speculation is this.

Chloe is at the sting operation, Ella helps and Dan is also involved close by at a car. Lucifer and Maze try to gain entrance and we have a Green screen used and some wires as they were shooting two different scenes and one of them had Ellis suspended I believe from the wires. No idea if he was trying that the human way or Lucifer had enough and flew up there yet at some point the suspect break free and goes to the street.

The last part of the episode is divided in two parts. The sting operation and the second painful part

^ The building on the right with the helicopter landing space is the where the penthouse is located and the middle of the street in front of Hope park is where the conclusion of the episode was shot with some other additional scenes. 

Two scenes were shot for the first time. One of them was Lucifer? lying, being levitated, using human means to climb to the penthouse? Who knows but there was a green screen behind him. Perhaps he was in the penthouse and was pushed or trying to avoid Chloe he opted to fall off? No idea. 

Now at the same location, we have Ella with a messy ban like she was really into the game she might have been instructed to Chloe to play at the penthouse.

Maze’s outfit makes me wonder if Maze decided to also go undercover to help Lucifer or even Chloe we will know once it drops I’m afraid. Yet it looks like she is along with the girls at the end of the episode. 

Also see javiergame4 ‘s BTS ON REDDIT AND POSTED ON IGMUR BTS

At the end, I think that the guy who Lesley-Ann was hugging was the culprit and the one who starts a chain of events. 

I do believe that Dan who might be in the car waiting for the sting to end up trapped with the culprit in the car and to be eventually be throwed outside the window. 

Of course, that is one interpretation as there is also the following bts Lucifer in front of the car and then the car seems to have turned so either Lucifer is the cause for the guy’s, perhaps Dan’s injury or the reason why he is paradoxically saved. Perhaps both. You can see teh green screen be used which may suggest a car chase or something which Lucifer puts into a halt. The second car I believe is Chloe’s. 

^The guy ends up on the street

But someone in white seems to protect someone so we do not know what is going on. If Lucifer protects Chloe, if some power comes forward and saves Dan. 

^The person in white next to the ambulance

My opinion? Chloe indeed needs help and Lucifer comes forward in a scene that reminds me a bit of Lois and Superman in Superman Returns meaning that it might be him saving her that exposes his return from Hell to her. 

Chloe, Ella - see the bun behind Chloe, and Maze in front of a dead body bag coroner bed. 

Also Chloe appears to be in front of the guy who gets injured... Again we assume this is the end of the episode... But someone eventually DOES die as we know from the body bag and again I would assume that it is Dan. Do not ask me why I insist on that so much but I have this gut feeling he will have a short experience with Hell which will allow him to seek a second chance like Charlotte for when Death reclaims him once more. 

Now if Dan does die for a while and Lucifer has a hand in his revival it would also explain why in 5x03 or even at the end of 5x02 we have Dan and Lucifer wearing the same amethyst bracelet... Also why Lucifer cannot really leave again for the time being... 

Additional info

We do know there is a woman guest with lines on the boat and the DTLA penthouse so I would keep an eye on her for the case.

Aimee Garcia was showing off Ella’s pens for the season and I have to admit that the screwdriver caught my interest for an obvious reason…

So has Amenadiel visited Lucifer at Hell? According to D.B.’s interview where he said that the character is currently busy so he has not, consider that Lucifer changing to a full Devil body in front of him may have not been the best memory he has of his baby brother. So in a way, Amenadiel might be deep down calm that the pieces have fallen into their place. He is of course sorely mistaken…

[riverdalepoet]

ALL I EVER WANTED (part 5)

PAIRINGS: Sweet Pea and OC (Emma Carter Wilson); Fangs and Kevin; Betty and Jughead; Toni and Cheryl

WORD COUNT: 1294

WARNINGS: language and suggestive themes

A/N:  Although Sweets has been back at it for months now, Emma’s going back to work, and Serpent life like she does everything else: head first. (I still own nothing)

PART 1      PART 2      PART 3      PART 4

________________________________________________

  Whether I liked it or not, I had to leave the comfort of my home and the cuddles of my four month old and get back to work.   Sweet Pea returned to Andrews Construction a mere two weeks after Carter was born.  Throughout his first day back, he flooded my phone with messages, utterly heartbroken to be away from his little buddy.

                Luckily, my mom stepped in to manage Southside Sounds while I was out having Carter.  She told me if I wanted to take another month, she would hold down the fort, but with Veronica’s competing shop opening up in a few weeks I had to get back to business.

                Southside Sounds Record Store had been in my family for generations and was the reason we moved to Riverdale in the first place.  When my grandfather passed, my mom had no choice but to come take it over.  A few years back my parents came to me desperately.  They had nearly run it in the ground, and if something didn’t change and fast, we would lose our business.  From that moment, the store was officially mine.  I cut costs dramatically, streamlined our inventory, expanded our marketing targets, and organized community events. I made it a safe place for Southside teens to relax, and find weekend and summer jobs. It took a lot of double shifts, sleepless nights, creativity, and breakdowns but we were finally seeing the product of our labor.

                That is until Veronica announced the opening of Archie’s birthday present- Archie’s Records.  The day I found out, I stormed to Andrews Construction, guns blazing with the flyer Veronica taped on our window crumbled in my fist.  Sweet Pea met me at the door and tried to get me to calm down, but once he saw the flyer, he called for Archie.

                It took some convincing, but Archie assured me that he had nothing to do with the business.  Veronica insisted that it be named for him, and he expressed how tactless he thought it was for her to do that.  Despite his vicious girlfriend’s influence, Archie was still a decent person.  That didn’t stop me from declaring war on our Northside competitor.

                Before I made my way to the shop, I dropped Carter off at my mother's.  I left after an hour of briefing her on everything Carter and crying about having to leave him for any amount of time.  When I finally made it back to the car with ruined makeup, I got a text from my husband.

[My Man:  Happy first day back to my sexy boss babe! I’m proud of you, and I’ll prove it later ; ). I’m bringing the new recruit by after he gets out of school.  His name is Blazer- he’ll be good there… and if he’s not, I can fix that.  I love you x]

                That was my favorite part of running the store- getting to help young Serpents.  I knew some of them worked for school clothes and even food, and it broke my heart. Shoving my phone back in my pocket, I made my way to the store.  When I opened the door, I saw that my mom made a few changes while I was gone.  I made a mental note to talk to Crystal about letting her mess with the way I had the store merchandised.

                I spent the next two hours in my office planning this week’s open mic night, and brainstorming ideas for opportunities to build our image in the community.  Right when I finished up sketching Friday’s flyer, Crystal walked in.  “Hey, Ems, welcome back,” she greeted, tossing her bag on the coat rack.

                “Hey, traitor.  Couldn’t tell my mom no, could ya?” I sneered, smiling at her regardless.  She flicked on all the lights and shrugged in response.

                “She said if I stopped her, she’d fire me.”

                “Dude, she’s not your boss.  I am.”

                “Yeah well, tell her that.  Your mom is scary.” She shuddered at the thought, making me laugh, and I helped her prep the store for opening.

                “Alright, alright.  Fill me in.  What all have I missed?

                Her blonde curls bobbed animatedly as she opened the doors and caught me up.  “So your mother ran off the kids that come in to just listen to the music.  You’re gonna have to round them up and convince them that it’s safe again, cause she was a total dragon.  There’s a local band that’s gaining some traction and they’re from the Southside, so we should be able to get them to perform here a few nights.  They just signed with that label out of Greendale- Bewitching or whatever the hell it’s called. Maybe you could call Gus to see if we can host their album release.”

                “Oh I like it,” I wrote it down on my list.  “Anything else?”

                She paused and pursed her lips, stalling.  “Yeaaahhh.  ‘Bitchronica’ got Eliza and The Delusionals to perform for the grand opening.”

                Crystal grimaced when I flung my clipboard on the ground, “How in the hell? They hardly come to the States,” I seethed, and forced myself to take a deep breath.  “It’s fine.  It’ll be fine.  We have our regulars, we have our plans, and we have our community.”

                “We just don’t have Eliza and The Delusionals,” she muttered, getting right to work on reorganizing the LPs.

                I glared in retaliation, “Do you want to be fired?”  Her hands were raised in surrender, and I shook my head.  By the time Sweet Pea showed up with Blazer in tow, we had the store back in functioning order.  He looked to be about sixteen and stood just below Pea’s shoulder.

                Sweet Pea walked him over to me and kissed me briefly on my forehead before turning back to his recruit and fixing him with his sternest glare.  “Alright, Blaze, no funny business.  You make one wrong move here, and you’ll pay for it tenfold in The Gauntlet, you got me?”  The poor kid nodded, looking truly terrified.

                I reached up to steal a kiss from my favorite baby Serpent wrangler and smacked him on the ass as he headed for the door.  Right before he left he turned around.  “Em, show him the basics and get Crystal to watch him after that.  Jug wants us all at the Wyrm.”

                “I guess my maternity leave is over on all accounts, huh?” I groaned as he threw me a wink.

                I watched him walk to his bike and drive off before turning around to my newest employee, “It’s really not as intimidating as he made it out to be.  Do you like music?” He nodded.

                “Do you plan to trash my store or screw me over?”

                His eyes went white, and he stammered nervously, “No ma’am.”

                “Then you’ll be fine.  Oh, and Blazer?  Don’t call me ma’am.”

                When I pulled in to the parking lot of the White Wyrm, Sweet Pea was leaning against his bike, waiting for me.  He smiled when I hopped out and whistled at him.  “Hey hot stuff, my husband’s not around.  Wanna have some fun?”

                He wrapped his arms around me and pulled me into him, placing quick kisses up the side of my neck.  “You’re dangerous.”

                “You ready to talk about what happened the other day on the job? I’m assuming that’s why we’re here.” I leaned against his chest.

                I felt his breath hitch in his chest beneath my head and I looked up at his conflicted face immediately. Whatever it was that he was called out to do was personal, and he was obviously struggling with it.  “Baby, I should’ve already told you this.” He took a few more minutes and clutched the smooth leather of my jacket desperately.  “My dad’s in town.”

[scalpelsculptures]

I woke up 2am one morning in August 2011, there was one point in time where I slept as early as 5pm after school only to be awake as early as this the next day.

I sat in the living room alone, “Another day with them delusional fucktards” I told myself as I face down staring on our cream-colored table. Last year in high school isn’t as exciting as people normally romanticizes it. I’m not excited. I’m tired and I now have 3 and a half more hours until 5:30 am for me to prepare for my 7am class. I then heard some rusting sound on the other side of the door in front of me. My heart was filled with joy with what I saw when I opened it: a small furry brown puppy jumped out of its box as soon as it realizes that someone is nearby. I forgot how it felt like having a puppy as our current dog, Puti, has been with us for around 7 to 8 years.

This puppy followed me and I’ve never been more energized minutes after I’ve just woken up. I will never forget how soft and small he was. How he fell adorably whenever he failed to climb the stairs. I’m just so happy.

We eventually named him Neso (my youngest sister can’t pronounce the word Keso before, which is derived from the Spanish word Queso that means Cheese).

For the rest of that goddamn year, with all the unnecessary drama that my classmates’ pettiness brought, I have always something to look forward to at end of each day: going home to our new baby.

In Neso’s first years, we’re worried as we noticed that we haven’t actually heard him bark. He is so friendly which also made us worry about him being stolen (we once saw him held by a stranger because Neso came up to him to play), but eventually he did, and that’s when one of our family friend brought live crabs that Neso never saw and found a threat.

Having two dogs, it was pleasant to see how Neso, the younger one, tries to play with our older dog, Puti. Puti sits in peace on one part of the house, then there goes Neso randomly barking at Puti, attempting to bite Puti’s tail and then releases loud crying noises when Puti threatens him with a growl. It was safe to say that the age gap made it hard for both of them to get along, until one fateful day.

One morning we heard Neso crying. We saw Puti giving Neso a “bath” which we found odd as Puti hated being in contact with Neso. We also noticed Puti’s behavior that day. He’s unusually salivating. Thinking what might caused it, my parents gave him first aid: Sugar solution drink. Puti went out afterwards and never returned.

 We searched for Puti, but it was unusual for him not to go home at the end of the day. It’s impossible that he has been impounded as he escaped all authorities’ attempt for the longest time. Wherever he was, we’re confident that he’ll go home by dusk. But he never did.

Then out of all research, we found one common result: Our dog is sick, and saved us the trouble of burying him. It was a hard pill to swallow, but we were able to accept it as years went by.

With the anxiously friendly Neso left in our home, we gave him all the love and care we could. He then grew up into a really good affectionate boy that seems to undyingly want pets and treats and rushes to welcome us whenever we arrive home. 

It was all this for the next 9 years of his life. 

August 12, 2020, my father’s 50th birthday, dad noticed Neso getting weak. He placed food on his bowl but Neso doesn’t seem to have enough energy to run towards it. When dad checked, he saw that Neso is covered in scars that might’ve been caused by bites of insects or parasites invisible in our eyes. Mom and dad ended up shaving Neso’s entire body to avoid further infection and to treat his wounds easily. Since Neso’s fur were shaved off, he was given an old shirt to keep him warm for the rest of the night.

The next day, Neso is given an antibacterial bath of extracted guava leaves. He turned green that day, but I thought it’s the best for him and he’ll soon be okay once the scars are healed.

August 14, Neso is undeniable getting weaker. He can no longer stand up to eat so we fed him by hand and he gladly ate whatever we handed him.

August 15, I was in shock to see Neso’s condition got worse. His scars were healed but I saw his leg flinching. Indication that something is wrong with his nerves already. He drastically lost weight that his bones felt like the’ll pierce through his skin. He can no longer eat, and I have to ask mom to buy liver, something goddamn delicious for dogs just so he would eat. My boyfriend asked me to check if his nose is dry, which is not, an indication that he has fever. Fever = infection. And seeing Neso, I know it’s going to be his last day with us. 

I thought that the parasites or insect that bit him might’ve caused the infection which went through his blood and affected his nutrition that went conspicuous with his weight. Seeing how this also affected his nervous system made me felt like this is something really worse where rushing him to vet won’t help, in short: It’s too late.

After a short afternoon nap I went to check on Neso and I saw that mom is giving him cough syrup that is alright to be given to animals. I sat beside Neso. I heard him starting to breathe heavily. I felt like he’s catching his breath. His eyes all wide. His muscles immovable. I was petting him and I know it’s near. I was whispering that it’s okay and I’d understand. That I’d want him to be free from pain and all this suffering, that I love him and thanked him for all of the years that he spent with us. That he spent loving us. After just a brief amount of seconds, his breathing stopped. No more pulse. No movement on his chest that would indicate breathing. He’s no longer blinking. His tongue out from the previous breathing. He’s gone. And mom told me to stop checking. I took my hand off of him and started crying. 

I never cried in front of my mom, but now I didn’t care. It was a painful sight. How the adorable puppy that made me happy ended up like this, almost skeleton and cold. But at the back of my mind I know that eventually he has to go. And if there is a spark of positivity in what happened, it’s the fact that I’m with him, beside him, holding him, in his last breath.

I closed his eyes and left. Mom will take care of his burial. 

Thank you Neso for loving us. Whole 9 years of dedication and making our lives a whole lot lighter. Our memories will never be forgotten.And I’ll continue to love as much as we loved you for all the future doggos we will have.

Cheers to the goodest of the good bois, run free Neso <3

June 2011 - August 15, 2020.

010608162020

[koreankokaine]

Flights- part 1 (a Monsta X story)

Words: 1348～

bold italics are Korean

bold underlined is a link.

“Bruh, I’m so excited for tomorrow we are going to see our boys.” My friend Ellie squealed through the phone on FaceTime. We had been talking for the past 3 hours about our trip to Atlanta for the Monsta X Beautiful in The U.S world tour. It was about 11:40 am. I was browsing my Instagram looking at the shows from the other cities the boys had played in.

“I know! I’m so excited!” I said matching her enthusiasm. At this time tomorrow, we will be in the air. Just about to land. “Yeah. Dude is it bad that I’m more excited for the plane than the guys.” I mumble under my breath. She gasped “Um. Hell yes, that’s bad.” I chuckled “HOLY SHIT DUDE!! Shownu will be within 100 feet from my body in less than 35 hours.” She gasped. I laughed again “Girl, you are crazy.” “Only for Shownu, Hoe.” “True,” I said laughing again. I was still scrolling when my mother yelled up to me “Mira, get off the phone it’s time to work.”

My parents and I live in a 3 room apartment above my family’s restaurant. Which is really popular and locally known. When I can, I waitress during the summer. “Hey, dude, I have to go text me later yeah?” “Yep,” She says completely distracted. Probably by Tumblr. I mean knowing her. “Coolio. See ya,” “Yeah bye.” She said as she hit the call button I grabbed my apron and ran down stairs. I worked for about 2 hours. When I was done I had a text from El and one other friend. El had said, “AND THE KINGS HAVE LANDED SAFELY IN ATLANTA.” I replied,” yassssss.” I ran back to my room and opened my other text.

“We are in Atlanta.”

I smiled, they’re here. So you’re probably thinking ‘wow that’s a coincidence somebody else is in Atlanta’. Welp, THEY are the reason 900 kpoppers are in Atlanta.

Monsta x.

You’re probably also wondering how I know Monsta x. That’s a story for later. Ellie DOES NOT KNOW ABOUT ME KNOWING THEM. It’s my surprise to her tomorrow. But anyway the text was from Changkyun or better know as I.M, the maknae of the group. I texted him back.

“Yay, I missed you guys so much. Can’t wait to see you guys tomorrow. We still meeting before the concert?”

It wasn’t even a minute before he replied: “Missed you too, bubbles and yeah just text me when you are at the hotel.”

“Yes, Kookang Oppa.” (*insert saluting sticker)

“Ok, see you tomorrow.” He replied quickly.

“Bye bye.” I typed back.

It was about 3:30 and I was kind of tired so I took a nap which turned into a full sleep. I was out for the rest of the night.

The next morning I woke up at 8 to a few IMessages from Ellie and a few Line messages from the guys.

ELLIE- 7:58: ”GOOOOOD MORNING THE CLOUDS ARE SHINING AND KIHYUN IS SINGING.” Girl, you don’t know how dead on you are. She must know it’s raining, either that or she is so excited that she’s delusional.

ELLIE- 8:08: “When is Tessa picking you up?”

Tessa is my 37-year-old sister. I was adopted and her father is my adoptive father. Her mother passed away when she was a teen and my adoptive mom is her step.

ELLIE- 8:15: “Have you left yet?”

ELLIE- 8:24: ”I’m leaving now, see you at the airport.”

KOOKANG OPPA: “SAFE FLIGHT BUBBLES. TEXT ME WHEN YOU LAND.”

APPA BEAR: “Hi Hello Annyeong, little one can’t wait to see you and your friend.” oh the jokes :)

MY FUTURE HUSBAND (*insert flame, lock and key, ring and purple heart emojis): “Hi future wife safe travels can’t wait to hug you.” OK, I didn’t program his name, he did and by he, I mean Lee Hoseok aka Shin Hoseok Aka Wonho.

CHAEBOT: “If I’m not awake when you visit wake me up.” lol yeah so I’m the only one he will allow to wake him up. Even if it is hard to do.

I replied to them respectively, rushed to collect my chargers, got changed and ran down stairs. Tessa was already here and had packed my backpack.

“Hello,”

“Hi, Tess.”

“Ready?”

“Yep. Bye, Mom. Bye, Dad.”

“Bye, honey. have a fun time take lots of pictures” She said coming over and giving me a hug.

“I will,”

“Tell El I said hi and tell Peanut happy birthday.” Peanut is Ellie’s now 10-year old brother who is cute and tiny hence peanut. He has been Peanut since before he was born. But according to her, his nickname is Peanut because he has a “peanut shaped head” so not true though.

“I will,” I said trying to avoid being sucked into another hug.

“We have to go our flight is taking off at 10:45 and have to get through security and…” Tess says.

“Yeah, yeah I know let’s go,” I say grabbing the rest of my stuff.

“Ok bye guys see you tomorrow” my mom calls.

“Bye be safe girls” yelled my dad from the behind the counter

“Thanks and ok” I open the door and walk out to Tess’ car.

I text El that we are on our way and put my headphones in. So here’s the dealio Tessa isn’t a kpopper but she watches Korean dramas and wants to travel to Korea but that’s it. El and I are 16-year olds so we couldn’t go on our owns. I have been into Kpop for almost 7 years and El 5-6. I stan most group but El, only a few. Monsta x is her main group. I can’t have one (the story is connected to the one for later) anyway this was my gift to El as an early birthday present. So I hope she’s happy with her surprises.

After 30 mins or so we reach the airport El is already here with her mom and little brother waiting for us. I text her letting her know we are parking and will be there in a few minutes. Tess and I walk from our parking level the elevators to go to the ground. We walked a bit and get to the door of the main building. I scanned the room quickly and saw my best friend. We spotted each other at the same time then rushed each other for a hug. We crashed almost falling. We hadn’t hung out in a month. We were best friend deprived. I separated from her when I saw Peanut.  “Hi Peanut happy birthday,” I said giving him a hug and kiss on his head. “Thank you,” he said blushing. Oh yeah, he has a crush on me and it’s so cute. I said hello and gave their mom a hug. She’s like a 3rd mom to me. After a few mins, I felt my phone vibrate. It was Wonho. He asked if we at our airport yet. I quickly replied. The notification reminded me of why we were at the airport. “Dude, we have to get going.” Tess looked at her watch. “Yeah we do,” She said. We said our goodbyes with the fam and went to go through TSA. Once we got through security we grabbed Starbucks and went to our gate. By the time we reached the gate they had just started to board. We waited till our zone was called. El and I were eager to get on but Tess, not so much. We boarded the plane. El was in the window on my left I was in the middle and Tessa on the aisle to my right. The three of us put in our headphones and relaxed. At 10:56 we were off.

When we were landing, El had a mini freakout because the plane hit turbulence. Let’s just say I’m cutting her claws when we get to the hotel. Cause that shit hurt. Excuse my language.

[beeroses]

THE ANYWHERE BUT HERE KIND

Warning : language

Opie, Jax and I had been quite the golden trio. Could’ve been at Hogwarts and for all I know, we would’ve killed Voldemort by the 3rd book. We spent an ungodly amount of hours together, the three of us. We were completely inseparable. And then, we weren’t. One day all was fine, the next, everything was shit. Although I never truly figured out what ultimately brought us there, on November 3rd 1991, we spoke our last words to each other : I HATE YOU. 

Although it felt to him like betrayal, I kept in touch with Opie, for as long as I can remember. Sure, we don’t see each other much, but we never forget our 3 calls : his birthday, my birthday and Christmas. We never spoke about it, the fall out, the nuclear war,  the Cold War that’s been going on all those years. He never talked about him. Yet, somehow, I was convinced there were still friends. I had left years ago, went my own way, lived my own life, traveled, forgot but never forgave. It’s been a hunting ever since the fall out. His words never left me, for some reason, when I close my eyes, I can still pretty much hear him. 

- I’m moving out, the day all this ends, I’m moving out. I’m moving away from this toxic life, this toxic town and those goddamn toxic people. 

- Yeah, yeah, yeah, you say that now, I don’t see you going anywhere, Opie answered.

I remember, clear as day, his eyes. It was as if I had shot him in the face. His eyes were darker than all the rage he had bottled up from his years of being a fatherless Son. His eyes were darker than the suit he wore to his dad’s wake. Darker than the soul of a killer he was patiently building up for himself. Darker than the deepest thoughts he ever had before. They’re filled with rage, filled with repulsion and disgust. And he spat me these words. The words that never left me. The words that made me travel 6000 miles to run away and yet, it was never far enough to forget them. 

- Oh yeah, we know how it is, you and your pride and your disgust over us, lowlives suckers from Charming goddamn town. It’d never cross your mind to stay around such a dump, there’d never be here something or someone good enough for your stupid standards. You’d rather run away to the other side of the world than try to find something nice here. You’d think the grass is greener elsewhere, wouldn’t you? Well let me tell you something : If you carry all the shit you carry around in your head all the way to goddamn Israel, your life’s still gonna be shit. Maybe you see yourself so much better than all of us, but you’re exactly like us, all of us. This toxic life and this toxic town and these toxic people are all you have. What the fuck you gonna do when you have nothing, huh? Because I ain’t gonna be there to save your asses from all the goddamn morons you find for yourself. And next time you have a knife to your goddamn throat, remember how much I’m not there. Remember why. Because you never actually found out what was toxic in your life : You. 

And that was it, last words spoken form him in years. And he left. I don’t even know if he’d heard me scream bloody murder at him : «I HATE YOU, I FUCKING HATE YOU». 

I don’t know what led me to hate him so much after that. But it never left. I always asked myself if it was because, somehow, I knew he was right and it made me mad. Or maybe I figured he was completely delusional. I know one thing though, I hated his tone. He spoke to me as tough he despised me with every fibre of his heart. And I never dared admit to anyone that one of the thing that hurt me the most was that he pushed me away when all I really wanted was for him to get closer. I still think about it. 13 years later and I still think about the one that got away. 

- Hey.. Let me talk.. I.. My wife.. she… 

All I could hear after that was sobbing. Opie never was one to cry but from the few intelligible words I picked, I got it. Something happened to Donna, something terrible. Something I feared would happen to anyone that dared stay in Charming. After minutes of silence that felt much more like hours, he asked if I’d bother come for the wake. Come back in town for him. What could I have said, other than yes? So I went. I went back to Oh so Charming town. Was met with old ghosts from the past. David Hale. Wayne Unser. Opie’s dad. Jackson Fucking Teller. I could’ve seen him in the dark. I would’ve known he was there even if I would’ve been blind. We didn’t speak. I don’t even know if he noticed me. He probably despises me as much as I, still. After all, it was all directed to me, all those despicable things he had to say. Maybe I still inspired just as much disgust to him as I did back then. 

It went by in a flash, I forgot to listen to the eulogy. I was loathing in my corner about Teller and what I hoped would’ve been his ugly face, which wasn’t ugly at all… I took off the second it ended. I had enough. I didn’t need his sarcasm or his snarky questions asking if I had lead a better life because I had left this shithole. 

Come to think of it, I think what bothers me most about what he said was that he was right. I just carried all my problems in my backpack all around the world. My problems never left me, I just took them to some pretty exotic places. And I numbed them with very exotic alcohol. I didn’t make anything better by leaving. It only made me cutoff from everyone I once knew. Possibly the only people that actually cared, once, about me. 

It had been weeks since Donna’s wake. I spent some time with Opie, I didn’t leave Charming. I stayed around and helped him with the kids and the house while I ignored the Club. Dreading Club. I managed to make sure I never crossed paths with Jax. And then, one day, in the mail box of my newly found place, just on the outskirts of town, came an envelope, unaddressed, unmarked.

«Hey Love,

I hope I can still call you that. I know I haven’t called you anything in a long time. I hope you’re well. I’ve been nagging Op for your phone number for years now and he never gave it up. He always said that he thought it was better that way. It’s been lovely seeing you around lately. I haven’t dreamt of seeing you back in Charming in years. I always figured you found yourself, I always hoped you made yourself a new life, that lead you anywhere but here. You were always that anywhere but here person. You’d made it very clear. It always bothered me. How you could just think you could pack up and leave, leaving us behind, leaving me behind. I’ve always been jealous that all the doors were open in front of you. I’ve always only had one door : I am to be president whether I like it or not. One door and I’m being pushed through it. I hope you found your peace. I hope you found your gold. You lost yourself so much looking for it, when we were younger. I’ve seen you being treated like crap so many times, I don’t think I can recall all of them. I’ve always hated it. I always wondered if instead of going from one douchebag to the other, you’d finally see me, look at me. I mean, I was standing right there, most of the time, hands full of the blood of the previous douchebag I had to beat up. And yet, obviously, you never did, see me. Plus, you’d made it very clear : you were leaving all of the «toxic» Charming had behind. And I’m part of Charming. And I’ll always be. I just always hoped that Charming would still be a little bit part of you. But it’s okay that it hasn’t been. The boys in the Club have been nagging me about you ever since Donna’s wake. I mean, I hadn’t seen you in so long. And although I never caught your eyes, I knew you’d seen me alright. You haven’t changed one bit, still as beautiful as the day I met you. And apparently, my «hearteyes» still showed. I don’t know why I felt compelled to write you this. I think I needed to let you know I really hope you’re happy, happy like you deserve to be. Like you always dreamt of being. I hoped… I hoped I was wrong. That the distance really was what you needed. Because speaking for myself, the distance that was put between us was nothing like what I needed or wanted. 

I’m sorry for saying terrible things. I wish I could do it differently. I wish I’d said that I loved you and didn’t want you to leave me, instead. I wish I’d told you I didn’t think I could be someone, without you, be someone worthy, I mean. You were the only thing not toxic in this town. 

Love

Jax» 

Oh. 

Suddenly, nothing and everything made sense, all at once. And I laughed. Don’t get me wrong, I cried. But I also laughed. I spent my life running away from the one person I wanted to get close to, because I thought he wanted me out of his life. I loathed him for so long. For nothing. He was just a stupid teenage boy who couldn’t put together 3 words. And I was just a stupid teenager that couldn’t put together the words «Make me stay». 

The next day, I dropped by Teller-Morrow. I had been avoiding the garage like the plague, the last few weeks, and today I just walk right to it. I know I saw a couple members of the Club look at me, either questioning my presence or smirking that I finally made the move. I found him at a picnic table. Not a picnic table, actually. The picnic table. The very one where I fell in love with him. The one where he shared half his lunch because I didn’t have one. The one where he wiped my tears, patted my back, made me laugh til the crack of dawn. 

He looked up, saw me and suddenly, he looked 16 again. His smirking face made me want to slap his smug ass attitude off. I didn’t. I just walked straight up to him and finally said the words, the ones stuck in my throat for so long, the ones I have been longing to say for ages : 

«Make me stay, Teller.» 

For @rebelwrites​ ‘ 900 Writing challenge

Hey you, haven’t written in a long time but your prompts inspired me, so if you have any left, shoot me a number 🥰

Hey that makes me so happy my prompts have inspired you.

Your prompt is:

Person A and Person B were best friends in high school until they had an ugly falling out with each other that turned them into enemies. Years later when they're out of school and have nothing to do with each other, Person A still hates Person B and assumes that Person B hates them too. Then one day Person A gets a giant text message from Person B apologizing for everything that happened between them.

Can’t wait to see what you come up with 💜

[tinygxrilla]

for the Get To Know Me Meme: all of THEMMMMMM

1. What is you middle name?Rose! :>
2. How old are you?15
3. When is your birthday?December 9th
4. What is your zodiac sign?Sagittariusssss
5. What is your favorite color?YELLOOOOWWW!!!!
6. What’s your lucky number?4 or 16
7. Do you have any pets?Yep- my golden doodle Cooper who is ADORABLE
8. Where are you from?I shall not disclose this information but a small town in the US!
9. How tall are you?5'2" I think
10. What shoe size are you?7
11. How many pairs of shoes do you own?2, one pair of boots and a kind of new pair of navy blue converse
12. What was your last dream about?Lol it was about a noose in my grandmas house o-o
13. What talents do you have?I like to draw! That’s it haha
14. Are you psychic in any way?Nerp
15. Favorite song?HM well the most important songs to me are:Cigarette Daydreams - Cage the elephantMr. Blue Sky - ELOBrave as a Noun - AJJ
16. Favorite movie?Swiss Army Man and moonrise kingdom :o)
17. Who would be your ideal partner?Someone very loyal, awkward, and loud (to contrast my shyness), and someone who is a good listener!!
18. Do you want children?YES!!!!
19. Do you want a church wedding?I think so, but I donno
20. Are you religious?Not religious exactly, I was raised as an atheist but I prey to a god
21. Have you ever been to the hospital?I’ve been to the hospital like 100000 times this month, but I’ve very luckily never been put in the hospital!
22. Have you ever got in trouble with the law?Noooope
23. Have you ever met any celebrities?No, that would be awkward as hell though so that’s ok
24. Baths or showers?Both!!
25. What color socks are you wearing?Purple and white with silver stripes, and my other one is plain white
26. Have you ever been famous?Hahaha no
27. Would you like to be a big celebrity?NaH
28. What type of music do you like?
I like classic punk, rock, alternative, and folk punk =]29. Have you ever been skinny dipping?NoPe I can’t do that I’d cry
30. How many pillows do you sleep with?1
31. What position do you usually sleep in?Just on my side, kind of in a ball?
32. How big is your house?I live in a condo, so relatively small? The basements finished though so not SMALL small??
33. What do you typically have for breakfast?Usually during school I don’t eat breakfast, otherwise I get a frozen coffee from Dunkin donuts or I eat toast
34. Have you ever fired a gun?NAaaAhh
35. Have you ever tried archery?In school we’ve done archery :D it’s fun but I suck
36. Favorite clean word?HaloOooo
37. Favorite swear word?Fuck or whore (not in like a slut shaming way lol) would be my main picks
38. What’s the longest you’ve ever gone without sleep?2 days?? Probably? I’ve gone longer with like little sleep but I don’t think I could last longer with no sleep
39. Do you have any scars?Yee yee
40. Have you ever had a secret admirer?I’m not cool enough for that shit man B(
41. Are you a good liar?I don’t lie a lot sooooo,,, maybe?
42. Are you a good judge of character?Probably not haha, I interpret everything in the worst possible way
43. Can you do any other accents other than your own?NoPe I suck at accents
44. Do you have a strong accent?Nope
45. What is your favorite accent?Boston accent
46. What is your personality type?INFP-T :>
47. What is your most expensive piece of clothing?Probably one of my sweaters from Urban Outfitters cause DANG those are $$$$
48. Can you curl your tongue?No :,(
49. Are you an innie or an outie?InniE bish
50. Left or right handed?right
51. Are you scared of spiders?Only stink bugs but if there’s one close to me while I’m in my household yes I’m terrified, also I hate when they’re in my shower it’s terrible
52. Favorite food?Pasta or mashed potatoes B}
53. Favorite foreign food?Americanized Chinese food lol
54. Are you a clean or messy person?MesSy
55. Most used phrased?I love you you’re the best for some odd reason
56. Most used word?Like
57. How long does it take for you to get ready?hOUrs upOn hours cause I take long showers
58. Do you have much of an ego?NaH
59. Do you suck or bite lollipops?Suck ););;);))
60. Do you talk to yourself?Kind of?? In my head 24/7 I do and sometimes I do out loud when I’m alone
61. Do you sing to yourself?Ya, but not in like a serious way
62. Are you a good singer?Most definitely not
63. Biggest Fear?People not liking me
64. Are you a gossip?I hate to admit it but yes definitely (only to really close friends and family though I don’t go spreading things)
65. Best dramatic movie you’ve seen?I’m not sure actually, I don’t watch a lot of movies or know what qualify as a dramatic one
66. Do you like long or short hair?Both!
67. Can you name all 50 states of America?This is terrible because I live there but I don’t think I can O-O
68. Favorite school subject?ART!
69. Extrovert or Introvert?Introvert, but if I’m not around people for too long I always feel like they don’t like me so I don’t love being alone for too long
70. Have you ever been scuba diving?No but that sounds awesome!!
71. What makes you nervous?The WOrLd, I hate interacting with people, even friends uKh
72. Are you scared of the dark?Ya, one time I though my dad was gonna sneak in my house and murder me because I was tired and very delusional and it was very dark and I was aFrAiD
73. Do you correct people when they make mistakes?Sometimes because I’m very annoying and irritable
74. Are you ticklish?YeS dear god
75. Have you ever started a rumor?No I ain’t startin shit
76. Have you ever been in a position of authority?I don’t think so
77. Have you ever drank underage?NoO
78. Have you ever done drugs?NoOooo
79. Who was your first real crush?I don’t think I’ve had one prey for me, maybe on my gay friend?? But I think I was just excited that I befriended a boy??
80. How many piercings do you have?None, I had my ears pierced once but they got infected so I let them close back up
81. Can you roll your Rs?“No ;(
82. How fast can you type?SuPPa fAsT
83. How fast can you run?Kinda fast for really short periods of time because ur girl has bad asthma
84. What color is your hair?BrowN
85. What color is your eyes?BroWn
86. What are you allergic to?Kittens :,,,,,( also seasonal allergies
87. Do you keep a journal?I did but it made me sad lol
88. What do your parents do?My dad like puts prices on houses and my mom wants to work at JJILL but she’s unemployed and a very hard working single mother
89. Do you like your age?Other people my age? No. Being my age? Yes definitely, perfect time to be a kid but also be a bit mature
90. What makes you angry?EVERYTHING OH MY GOSH;-people who lie-people who romanticize mental illness-people who post online about other people-people who don’t understand mental illness-people who joke about wanting to kill them self
91. Do you like your own name?Not Amanda really but I like Mandy!
92. Have you already thought of baby names, and if so what are they?I really like the name Sally and Eileen but I don’t know about boys names
93. Do you want a boy a girl for a child?Either would be great but as of now I think it would be nice to have a lil lady
94. What are you strengths?I’m very loyal I think
95. What are your weaknesses?Shy, awkward, nervous, and also physically weak lol
96. How did you get your name?My mom or my Grammy (it’s a debate) just liked it
97. Were your ancestors royalty?NoPe
98. Do you have any scars?This was already a question! Ha HA
99. Color of your bedspread?I just got a white one with pickles on it from Ikea OuO
100. Color of your room?Like a cool grey color

AYYY I’m done!! Thank you for asking because it’s very obvious I love to talk about myself, also I’m assuming nobody read this but that’s ok cause it was lots of fun

[agentdagonet]

Echoes, Ch. 7

can’t believe I forgot to put the last 2 chapters of Echoes up here. Seeing as I’m about to upload chapter 9, I’ll put 7 and 8 up beforehand. Thanks for sticking around, guys!

Find it here on AO3

Find it here on tumblr:  1 2 3 4 5 6

Fic Summary: Feet dangling off the edge of the bed, hands still resting on the earpieces of his glasses, Eggsy opened his eyes.

         And promptly shut them again, screwing them shut like a child who had the distinct misfortune of biting into a raw lemon. Breathing harshly in his nose and out his mouth, trying to stave off whatever delusional panic had befallen him, Eggsy reopened his eyes.

‘Harry?’

Or: The Hologram Story Nobody Asked For

         Eggsy had spent the weeks following the Hologram Incident trying to go back to the way things had been before it. Sure there were things missing in the house now, a few knick-knacks and paintings- the most notable loss was that picture of a demon-looking thing by the kitchen which Eggsy was only too happy to part with. Mr. Pickle was one thing, he had a sentimental excuse, but the demon-thing (he didn't even want to give it a name. When you name something, you want to keep it- no way Eggsy was going down that slope) had put Eggsy off from eating more than once after tough missions.              

         He didn't wear the glasses inside, changed from his suits as soon as he was able, locked everything back up tightly in the wall, and moved on. It's what Harry would have wanted.              

         Except he couldn't put Holo-Harry from his mind. He'd wanted Eggsy to have something of him than those few periods they'd had together that hadn't involved Eggsy reading to an unresponsive body. What had he meant by that? What was hiding in those hard drives that Harry had wanted him to have? As curious as he was, he knew that now was not the time. He was still mourning him, he was still reeling from the loss of him, and to go and peruse his private files... Eggsy was just about positive it would break him, to learn more about Harry than he had already known. If this was how shattered he was from losing a near-stranger how much more painful would it be to have lost a friend?      

         It's a unique situation, to be able to learn more about someone you already felt connected to after they had died, but it wasn't one Eggsy thought he could get through. Not yet.              

         So he snatched up every mission he had the opportunity to bid for. He kept himself busy, out of the house, away from his mum and Daisy; he kept himself from thinking too deeply about anything other than completing the mission at hand and getting out alive. Of course, these things weren't meant to last, and soon enough Eggsy had broken his left arm and was forced out of the field for just over a month barring emergencies.

         'You can't be serious- the fuck am I supposed to do here for a month?!'                        'You could always catch up on your reports- last I heard Merlin was ready to break a limb himself if it would get you to write them up.' The words were muffled in the way only holding a pen cap between your teeth can make them, but they needn't be perfectly clear for Eggsy to hear the smile in her voice. Roxy had a sharpie in one hand, Eggsy's arm in the other, held at such an angle that he had no idea what she was doing with the former of the two.         

         'That's exactly what I'm gonna do, yeah? Out of commission so I'm gonna write about all those times I actually did the job without fucking up. Cheerful.' It's bitter, but he chuckles anyway. In his haste to get in and out of his (Harry's) house he hadn't bothered to sit down and type up his reports. 'Why do they need me to write 'em down anyway? They was there and there's recordin's and shit why torture us with paperwork?'              

         'Just because we're not affiliated with any government doesn't mean that we're without governing, Eggsy.' She'd spit the cap out, now, her tongue sticking out slightly in concentration, 'But I also think they're a bit mad you've been doing so much. There's policies about working too much, you know, and if it weren't for the world still being a relative wreck from V-Day you'd have passed them long ago.'              

         'I don't see you getting corrected for bein' out on assignment so much.' This was the first time they'd had more than an hour together since the Hologram Incident- not that Roxy knew anything about that. He didn't know how to put it into words- and he highly doubted Merlin was off telling Roxy about all his personal time outside of HQ. Still, the point remained: Roxy had been just as busy as Eggsy had been, she wasn't one to talk.              

         'That's probably because I do what they ask the first time, Eggsy.' She nods to herself, taking a picture on her phone before capping the sharpie. 'Anyway, I'm off for the next two days- you up for a night in tomorrow? I'll bring pizza, you grab beer, we'll Netflix a shitty film?'              

         'Yeah, alright.'

-----

         'Hey, mum.' Eggsy kissed her on the cheek before swooping down to do the same to his sister; if he was gonna be grounded for the next month he was going to use the time to catch up with his family. No better use for it.

         'Surprised to see you 'round, sweetheart- it's been a while.' She continued to stir the pot, but nods him towards the place at the table he sets up every time. It was autopilot, and luckily he was over often enough for dinner to warrant the muscle memory, though he often arrived more injured than the last time she'd seen him.              

         'Yeah, sorry 'bout that- they had me travelling from posh place to posh place picking up fabric- got this blue silk in that would look lovely on you, mum.'

         'Oh none of that tripe here, love. Forge' about work and enjoy a nice dinner with your family. Just cos you've got your own place and a fancy job doesn't mean you can' come back home and relax, babe.'

         Dinner itself was uneventful, on the whole; Eggsy made sure Daisy ate all her food and didn't feed it all to her imaginary dragon, Spots. Cute as the notion was, the mess was not fun to clean up, so Eggsy was sure to act out leaving some food for Spots in the living room before they actually began eating. The evening settled down when Daisy tuckered out, Eggsy brought her to bed and read her a story about knights and dragons (she had an unnatural obsession with dragons for her age), and now the two adults were sat on the couch with mugs of hot chocolate.              

         There was something to be said about the little things.              

         'Had someone come 'round about your dad, called himself Merlin.' Eggsy didn't want to have this conversation now. Actually, he wasn't certain that he wanted to have this conversation ever but this was his mum and there was no way he was getting out of this.              

         'Oh?'              

         'Don't play dumb, Eggsy; there's only so many people in the world who would willingly introduce themselves as Merlin- I know he's your boss.’

         ‘Yeah, well, forgive me if this is all new territory- I never really expected you to meet. Let alone in those kind of circumstances.’

         ‘So you knew he was coming, then? Pretty out of nowhere.’

         'You can’t plan finding someone’s Will when you didn’t think one existed, mum. And I wasn’ gonna drag up the past- not after you just getting through everything else.’

         ‘You knew what happened to your dad and you didn’t tell me?’

         ‘Yeah; I mean it’s not like I could just pop up and say “hey, mum, I know how dad died!” cos you’d have asked how I found out and it woulda been a mess. Never you mind that Dean literally tried to kill me the day I found out and only stopped cos of that voice saying he was gonna tell the police. Never felt like an okay time to tell you, after that.’ Eggsy shrugged; he couldn't meet her eye, not with that between them.

         ‘I- well... you still shoulda told me.’

         ‘Why, to get you all depressed all over again right as you were getting through this? I remember what you were like right after dad died. I wasn’t gonna subject Daisy to that.’

         ‘I did my best, Eggsy!’

         ‘You let dads death eat you up inside so deeply that you forgot my birthday and I had to go and make myself somethin’ sweet cos I wanted my birthday to be like before. Twice.’ Michelle had no response to that, looked down at her lap and wrung her hands trying to think of a way to show Eggsy she had been trying. ‘I know it was hard, mum, but it was like you forgo’ all about how your decisions were affecting me after that. I don’t blame you now, but it weren’t fun either and I wasn’t gonna let Daisy go through something like that if I could help it. So no, I wasn’t gonna tell you.’

         ‘Well I know now. And I haven’t ended up like that.’ She’s justifying the past and defending the present all in one go. Or trying to, at least.

         ‘And I don’t think I’ve been more grateful to the universe in all my life.’

         ‘... So he also mentioned his friend.’ It's said casually, overly casually, and Eggsy was immediately on alert. This wasn't gonna end well.

         ‘The one who died?’ Maybe if he acts disinterested she'll let it go.

         ‘Yeah; said his name, too’ Oh no. ‘Said his name was Harry an’ doesn’t that sound familiar.’

         ‘Mum, do you really want to talk about this now?'

         'Yeah, I do- why're you so banged up about his friend's death that you're still needing nights with Roxy? I love her, don' get me wrong, but it feels like every time you both are over she ends up holdin' you while you cry.' She may not have been there for him before but she sure as hell was going to be there now. If it wasn't already too late.              

         'Yeah, well I don't want to talk about this.' C'mon Michelle, you can do this.              

         'Tha's just too bad, Eggsy, cos I got the feeling you need to talk abou' it. I'm not letting this slide, love, it's been over a year-'              

         'Yeah well it certainly took you longer than tha' to pull yourself together after dad so sorry if I'm not over his death yet.'              

         'I-' She looked contrite, one hand extended as if to offer comfort, but Eggsy didn't want anyone touching him right then. He's never good about tactile comfort in times of stress. Dean left a pretty deep scar over the whole touching thing.              

         'I'm heading out, mum. I'll see you next week, maybe.' She'd pushed him too far, too soon.

         Michelle covered her mouth with one hand, stifling a sob as the door clicked shut behind him.

[fortroubledteensrpg]

garcia-harper, layla has been granted admission to our program. please follow the necessary steps prior to your arrival. 

{ o o c }

name: Lili.

pronouns: She/Her.

timezone: GMT.

age: 26

rp experience: rfp

anything else?: rfp

{ i c }

character name: Layla Sofía García-Harper.

age: 16, birthday 3/3.

reason for being sent to schuester’s boarding school: The official reason, as explained by her stepmother, is “Layla’s mother passed and she just isn’t coping well.” (Explained properly in bio!)

extra curricular: Drama Club, Volleyball.

fc: Cierra Ramirez.

sexuality: Pansexual/Panromantic.

ships/antiships: Chemistry + Forced.

two tweets:

@laylasays: Nobody has spoken to me for an hour… Turns out I had my earbuds in my ears, but no music playing. #oops

@laylasays: I don’t understand how makeup gurus become as skilled as they are. I’m so jealous!

sample para:

Usually, Santana was used to having complete control of everything going on in her life. That was how she liked it. She liked having control over every situation, actually. But, right now, she didn’t have any control over this at all. The minute she’d agreed to go to New York, she’d basically handed over any and all control of her own situation to Rachel Berry, without Rachel even knowing it. If Rachel decided that she didn’t want Santana to stay with her, that would put the Latina in a situation that meant basically just giving up and going home, because there was no way she could survive out here on her own. Sure, her parents had given her a lot of money, but not enough to rent an apartment all by herself and actually manage to live. She didn’t have actual commitments out here like Rachel did, she was literally just coming here to attempt to find something more than what she’d had in Lima. If Rachel didn’t take her in, nobody else would.

With Rachel having all of the power and control here, Santana knew she couldn’t mess up. She had to just say what Rachel needed to hear, and what she thought she wanted to hear, then all she could do was sit there, attempting to look patient, as she waited for Rachel to digest everything, then ultimately for her to react. When the girl finally started to speak, Santana found herself biting gently onto her lower lip, assuming that the ‘first of all’ was just the start of a long rant about how completely irresponsible this was of her to do, and how she shouldn’t have just expected to be given a place to stay. So, the words that actually left the girl’s lips were slightly surprising to the Latina, enough to cause her eyes to widen a little bit. She stayed quiet, though, just nodding along in agreement. That was definitely better than the rant she’d expected. Of course, it wasn’t anything to do with the living arrangements, which were obviously the most important thing in Santana’s mind.

Then, there was the secondly. Of course. This was where the rant was going to kick in. Surprisingly - again - it didn’t, and Santana found herself stunned to silence yet again. All she could do was watch as Rachel sunk down onto the couch beside her. In all honesty, Santana knew she shouldn’t have been so surprised about Rachel’s hospitality. Rachel wasn’t raised the way Santana was, Rachel was from the right side of the tracks, and people like that were always willing to help other people out, right? Opening her mouth to respond, Santana was cut off by the hand now lightly resting against her own, causing her to flinch a little at first, but instead of pulling away, she just glanced down at their hands for a moment, her eyebrows knitting together. After a moment, she shook her head, finally pulling her hand out from under Rachel’s, “Alright, well I’m grateful you’re doing this, but don’t hold my hand,” she shook her head, folding her arms to stop anything like that happening a second time over.

Santana was still left sitting there, trying to take in everything that’d just happened when Rachel had stood up and started walking away, leaving Santana still somewhat confused, although she wasn’t about to question anything. As far as she was aware, Rachel had just offered her a place to stay, and that was the whole reason Santana had showed up on her doorstep in the first place. Questioning it would’ve been stupid. All she did instead was stand up once Rachel was out of sight, then follow her over to the next small room, leaning up against the doorframe and watching as the other girl started pawing through the fridge. “I’m not that hungry,” she stated, shaking her head, “I’m probably just gonna go to sleep. I’ve been traveling for a while today.” With that, she pushed herself up from the frame so that she was finally upright again, though she made sure to remember her manners before actually walking away, “Um, hey… Thanks, Berry,” she said, looking away as she spoke, since thanking people - like apologizing - didn’t come easily to Santana. But, she’d said it now, so hopefully that would be enough.

bio:

To say that Layla, born in Dallas, Texas, was a mistake would be unfair. The mistake was in how she came to be, but her mother, Ana, would never regret her daughter. Was she ashamed of sleeping with a married man? Yes, absolutely. David Harper was not only married, but he also had a family. Ana may have been young, but she knew that their short-lived affair wasn’t right, and she would never, ever mention it to his wife. Instead, Ana and her baby bump took off to a whole new town, with David secretly sending child support once baby Layla was born.

A high school drop-out who believed she would make it big in the entertainment industry, Ana didn’t have a lot of money, but she had a lot of ambition. Ambition that had to be put on hold now that she would have a daughter to raise. One look at Layla, though, and Ana knew her dreams had changed direction. She didn’t care about being in the industry herself anymore; with her big, bright eyes and long, thick lashes, she wanted Layla to be a star, instead.

Layla’s first job was in modeling clothes for Baby Gap. The paycheck was nothing crazy, but it put a meal on Ana’s table, and that was important. It also was the start of Layla’s portfolio, which Ana hoped would grow quickly. And for a while, it did. Baby Layla, and then toddler Layla, was landing parts in commercials left and right, with the two eventually ending up leaving their Texas home, and moving in to a tiny apartment in a terrible neighborhood on the outskirts of Los Angeles, California.

As Layla grew, the jobs kept on coming. She wasn’t famous, obviously, but she at least had her little foot in the door of the industry, and Ana made a point of enrolling her in any and every class possible. Layla attended dance classes, acting classes, singing classes. You name it, Layla was an active member, though once she’d reached her teens, she began to suffer the consequences. Branded a loser, maybe because the other kids were jealous of seeing her face on posters and in small parts in random sitcoms, Layla’s freshman year was hell. She was bullied and frankly tortured, all for something she didn’t even want to do.

Leaving school one day, Layla had her mind set on telling her mother she was done. She didn’t want to lead a showbiz life anymore. The jobs had stopped coming as thick and fast now that she was in her awkward teen years, and all Layla would really receive was rejection and ridicule. However, arriving home to the neighbor and a policeman letting her know that her mother had sadly passed in a road accident completely tore Layla’s world apart. If she thought she’d suffered before, it was nothing in comparison to this.

With no other family in LA, and with her mother losing contact with her family once she’d disgraced them by giving birth to a child so young and out of wedlock, other than placing her in the foster system, Layla’s father was her next option. She’d never met him before, she only knew his name and that he would send child support checks each month. To say that David Harper was the nicest man would be a lie, but he also wasn’t a total monster, so he wasn’t going to refuse his flesh and blood refuge. This meant confessing his affair to his wife, Renee, though, who resented Layla from the moment they met. Regardless, Layla was shipped off to Dallas where the Harper’s took her in. Though they fight a lot now, Renee decided to stay with her husband, though their marriage is very rocky at best.

Despite the fact that David had fathered multiple children, all of whom now lived under his roof, he was definitely not meant for fatherhood, nor was his wife for motherhood. They really weren’t great parents to even the children they’d brought up, so Layla had no chance. Every time she so much as spoke, her stepmother would claim she was being out of line, and when Layla decided she wanted to continue to pursue her acting career—not for herself, but for her mother—she was branded delusional. Life with her dad and stepmom was a far cry from the life she’d grown up accustomed to, but at least Layla had her siblings.

When she isn’t acting, Layla is a quiet, even shy person. She can turn on the charm for the camera, but as a person she’s somewhat timid; definitely not the type to wind up in a school for troubled teens. However, from the moment she’d stepped foot through the door, Renee had wanted her back out of there, and found that Schuester’s was her ticket to getting exactly that. Layla didn’t need to be there, and protested even as she was being driven to the school with her belongings to enroll, but Renee insisted. Her excuse was that Layla had lost her mother and didn’t know how to cope, but that wasn’t it at all.

Unfortunately, Layla is there for, honestly, no reason other than because her stepmother doesn’t want her around, but she’s too young to be kicked out with nowhere to go, so Renee feels she’s doing something kind by placing her in the boarding school. Resigning herself to her fate, though, Layla is trying to look at the positives. Anything has to be better than living in a household where she’s unwanted, so maybe she can look at Schuester’s as a fresh start, a blessing from her mother. It’s a blessing in a deep, dark disguise, that’s all.

[nomdeplumes-blog1]

A Fallen December

Awaken by the intriguing aroma of chocolate chip pancakes, my grandma called up the stairs to me “Jacob, breakfast is ready darling”. I quickly hurried down the stairs like a 5 year old on Christmas morning. Strange that an 18 year old boy would be so anxious just to eat, but who am I kidding, all we boys do is eat.

Soon enough, my mother and father stroll into the kitchen with my little four year old brother Lucas trailing not far behind. “Good Morning everyone” said my mother, I simple reply back with “good morning mom”. My grandfather quietly reading the sports section of the newspaper to see how his Toronto Maple Leafs are doing. My father suddenly joins him. My little brother crawls up into his high chair, which he is a little too big for now. His mouth watering for the pancakes, My mother getting her morning tea, and me… just as excited to eat as my little brother. While Lucas and I stuff our faces full with Chocolatey-Doughy goodness, my mother says to all of us “you guys excited for our annual Christmas in the Park walk” I boringly reply with an exhausted and sarcastic “Can’t wait!!”

My mother sighs and tells me to get In the Christmas Spirit but I told her

“It’s hard to get in the Christmas spirit when you’re a thousand miles away and not with your friends”

My mother just laughed at me and said

“Son, the only thing you need during the holiday season is the warmth and love from your family”.  

In a way, she is right, and with her birthday being tomorrow, I knew I had to stay in her good books. Christmas time was always special for my family. Between my mother’s birthday on the 22nd, visiting my grandparents and all the big dinners, we definitely had our plates full.

We always participated on the Christmas in the park walk on the 23rd of December, to kind of tie all of our celebrations together before Christmas Eve. For my brother, even though he didn’t know it, Santa was going to be at the park, taking pictures and asking kids what they wanted for Christmas, just like all the malls in the world do. As our family wanders through the brightly and festively lit park, Lucas spots Jolly Old Saint Nick from down the path, he enthusiastically screams

“Mommy, mommy, It’s Santa, Lets go”.

Lucas quickly scurries off before my mom can even grab his hand.

As Lucas sprints with all his might to the line waiting for Santa, he gets mixed in amongst the many delusional kids who actually think that a man who fly’s around the world in a slay pulled by reindeer in one night delivering presents to each house is actually real. In a scrum with squirming and raised voices between parents and kids, my mom is trying to find that little blond haired kid. She starts yelling

“Lucas, Lucas honey” followed by “Lucas Where are you?”  Still no answer.

My mother soon starts to ask my father and I to look for Lucas in the crowd. We find nothing, my mother starts to panic. We then surround the area looking for anywhere that Lucas may have gone. We ask nearby parents and their kids, still nothing. Shortly after, everyone in the park is looking for my little brother. 1 hour goes by…nothing. 2 hours go by…nothing. Next thing we know almost 4 hours since we last saw my little brother. In my head, I am just praying that he is playing a game of hide and seek with mom. But deep in the back of my mind, the only thoughts that are coming to me…Lucas has been Kidnapped.

Immediately we call police and report Lucas missing. My mom starts screaming

“It’s my fault, it’s all my fault”

I try to console her but even my words and thoughts are just as jumbled as anyone else. With my mom in a state of shock, I described to the police that my brother was a

“Small, 4 year old boy. With blonde hair and sparkly blue eyes, oh and he also has a scar on the left side of his chin that stretches to his lip, umm he was wearing a red coat with a black patch on the side I think, I don’t know what side I can’t remember, just please help find my brother”

“We will be sending the amber alert to all of the local news stations, newspapers and radio stations around the town; we are going to do everything we can to bring home your little brother”

I steadily weep as I feel that the disappearance of my brother is somehow my fault, with that weight on my shoulder burdening my every thought and action to a grueling tee, I had no other thought in my mind that what I needed to do was help as much as I could to find my brother. As much as I can’t stand to think of it, whoever took my brother from us, doesn’t know that he has asthma, and also doesn’t know that he has a severe peanut butter allergy, for all I know my brother could be laying dead in a garbage bag in some rotten and forgotten dumpster in a back alley somewhere.

*knock knock*

My mother who hasn’t slept in near two weeks springs from her seat at 6:34 pm on a Wednesday night; to open the door to the police and one of the detectives working on my brother’s case.

“We are going to need you to identify some articles of clothing that may belong to Lucas Mrs. Smith, can you help us” said the detective to my mother.

“Yes of course”

When shown the articles of clothing my mother responds with a desperate

“No, No, *Sobbing*, Nope, N-, wait...”

“Is there a piece of clothing you recognize Mrs.?”

“That’s Lucas’ coat, that’s his coat, THAT’S HIS COAT” screams my mother with tears running down her face. My mother flips the coat over and this is where my mother truly lost all hope.

“Please tell me that isn’t…*sobbing and anger building up* no, no it can’t be. It isn’t!”

“Mrs. Smith, we found this jacket 4 kilometres in perimeter to where your son went missing, and when we discovered the coat, there was also a pair of bloody socks along with the bloody coat. But Mrs. we need you to be calm and stay positive, I know it might be har-“

“*crying uncontrollably* you do not tell me to be calm, and stay positive. Let me ask you this officer, do you have any children?”

“*sighs* yes, I have a 3 year old girl and a boy on the way”

“And you love them very much, am I right?”

“I see where you are going with this Mrs. But unt-“

“until you go through what I am going through, you have no right to tell me to be calm, this is a parent’s worst nightmare, and it is happening right now, to me; not you…ME. You find this son of a bitch or else I will find them myself”

“We will do whatever we can; we have set up a tips hotline for anybody that has any information on Lucas and where he might be”

The residents of Steamboat Springs Colorado decided to hold a candle light vigil for my brother in an attempt to bring the community together and rally behind my family at this difficult time. The people who put this on want myself and my mother and father to say a few words that may help anyone with the whereabouts of my brother. You might wonder why I seem so calm, in regards to what is going on around me. Personally…my mom is a complete wreck, alongside my father and grandparents, but me, I spend every day with that little guy, I am his role model, mentor and big brother to say the least. I know that Lucas would want me to be strong, and have hope for him. For my parents sake, as much as I am crying myself to sleep at night waiting for that knock on the door with my brother waiting there, I need to be strong for myself, my parents especially, and Lucas, because I know he is counting on me to be strong for him.

While at the vigil I noticed people of all ages paying their respects to us, leaving flowers and toys. While my mother was up on the stand giving her speech, I noticed a blonde lady, standing in the back left corner of the crowd, she just seemed out of place; sort of like the odd one out. Later in the night as the vigil was concluding and everyone was leaving, the same women who I found to be peculiar and odd filed into the line to give my mother and I hugs and spread her love. But when she reached the front of the line, I was quite baffled as to her words of “love”

“I am so sorry for your loss”

said the weird mysterious blonde woman. My mother didn’t know what to say because there had been no word of Lucas’ body being found dead, and usually those are the words you say when someone has died, this rose a high amount of suspicion in my eyes. The blonde woman then hugged my mother and proceeded to walk off into the dimly lit street. My mother seemed concerned as to why the woman would say that, but with all the other things going on, that was the least of her worries.

A day later, my father and I had run to the local supermarket to get some groceries for home, when in the corner of my eye, I noticed the same blonde woman in the children’s food aisle. Buying apple sauce and yogurt. What really stood out to me was what she was holding in her left hand; the lady had maybe 2 or 3 hangers filled with children’s clothes. It seemed odd to me as both times I have seen this woman; she has never had a kid with her. I had an eerie feeling about this woman, and I trusted my instinct on it. I told my dad the story about the night at the vigil and he reluctantly believed me that I thought something was up. As she checked out of the store and proceeded to her car, I took down her license plate number on my phone. I asked my dad just to follow her where she goes (out of curiosity of course). She then ended up driving to a house just out of town that had a red barn in the field surrounding the house, the place was kind of on its own, the next neighbour, not too close but not too far. The lady proceeded to carry her groceries and children’s clothes into the house. But soon after 3 or 4 minutes, she then got back into her car and drove back into town to a small little townhouse just a block away from where my grandparents lived. She then went inside and didn’t come out. I took down the side road number of the barn house, as well as the address that she finished at. I took both of those addresses to the police and told them my curiosity behind the whole thing. One address turned up to a lady named Shelly Stevens, and the other came up under Robert Stevens. I found it hard to believe that the two last names were just a coincidence. Turns out that Shelly Stevens was Robert Steven’s daughter. Later at the house, I stumbled into conversation with my grandmother and I asked her if she knew who Robert Stevens was. She paused and asked why I would ask that. I then continued to ask her if she knew who Shelly Stevens was; she paused and asked me if I was okay.

“I’m fine grammy, but can you answer those questions for me please”

“I grew up with Robert Stevens, he was born and raised here, an odd fellow I must say, my friends and I always thought he was strange. He got into some pretty bad trouble when he graduated high school though”

“What kind of trouble gran?”

“He got charged of rape and murder of a 5 year old girl, but never got convicted, for some reason, everybody in the town knew he did it, but the evidence never added up to prove that Robert was the one. We were all shocked when the verdict came out. Since then he has lived out in some old barn house on route 53”

“Is his daughter Shelly?”

“Yes, he had Shelly maybe a year before the murder trial happened. She knows all about her father’s past yet she still seems to love him as if nothing happened”

*Phone rings*

“Hello?”

“Hi Jacob, Its officer Lee, we have a potential lead on the case”

“Well what is it?!”

“A lady was walking down the street when she saw a middle aged woman carry her baby into the backseat of her car, but she recognized the baby, and when we questioned her, the description of the baby matched Lucas’ description perfectly”

“Well did she take the license plate number down?”

“Yes, she did…Jacob, we would like for you to come down to the police department as soon as you can”

“I’m on my way” *Jacob Hangs up*

When I got to the Police Office, Officer Lee called me into his office immediately. He proceeded to tell me that the license plate number on the car, matched the one of Shelly Stevens, the same license plate I took down at the supermarket. They  also received another tip that Shelly Steven’s car was parked at her father Robert’s house approximately 20 minutes later, seen entering the house with the child that matched the description of Lucas.

“Is there any way we can search their houses or bring them in for questioning?”

“That’s what we are going to do, we are going to get Shelly right now for questioning, I suggest you go home and stay patient. Detective Bryce will inform your parents on the current situation”

Apparently, when Shelly was brought in for questioning, she seemed to know a little bit too much for what the police was asking her. The one thing that got the detectives extremely giddy is when she proclaimed that she had never seen the baby in her life, and maybe half an hour later they asked her the same question, and she said that she hasn’t seen the baby since the night he disappeared. Which places her at the scene of the crime, and in the correct timeframe in which Lucas went missing. The police then got a warrant for her arrest; they then searched the house and found a large amount of children’s food, a high chair, and children’s clothes. When asked if she had any children she replied with a no, but she then later started to talk about how 4 years prior, she was pregnant with a man’s baby who raped her and ended up abandoning her, a single mother to be with only her father to help her. Unfortunately Shelly Stevens had a miscarriage. It was her dream to be able to give life to a child, and when this happened it enflamed her. She then admitted to going into deep depression and claimed that all the children’s items at home are for the baby she never had. But I then thought to myself, why she would still be buying baby food and clothing. The police then searched her father’s house where they found the Holy Grail. The officer on the search found a hidden closet behind the fridge that contained a staircase leading to a basement underneath the house. When the officers went into the basement they found even more children’s clothes, a crib, strollers and pairs of shoes. The detectives and forensic scientists analysed the scene. When searching the clothing for any clues, one of the officers saw one thing that opened his eyes. A pair of initials on the inside tongue of a size 3 shoe, labelled L.S and I do not believe that that was a fluke of some chance. The police now had arrested both Shelly and Robert Stevens, but they needed more proof to convict them on the kidnapping of Lucas. The police showed up to the house with pictures that we would need to identify as property of Lucas or not. Most of the pictures were irrelevant, except for the necklace that I got Lucas for his baptism. Gold cross that he wore every day. We then knew that Lucas was in that house somewhere, or had been there. When brought into questioning, Shelly claimed that she didn’t know anything and continued to deny it. When her father was questioned, he replied with

“You aint gonna find shit”

“Oh we have already found plenty, JUST TELL US WHERE HE IS!”

Screamed Officer Lee. Robert Stevens just chuckled, and gave a disgusting smirk right into Officer Lee’s face. I then remembered something that I think would help. The barn house that was on the property, there could be clues in there. When the police searched the barn house the first time all they found were hay bales stacked up against a wall in a disorganized way. When moving the hay bales a second time, there was a grate on the ground that had a handle on it. When it opened up, all we could see were bloody children’s clothes, and hair snippets everywhere. The thought that my brother was dead, had become a realization when I saw a tee shirt of his on the ground and a pile of blonde curly hair. While investigating this tunnel that seemed that it ran for miles, we found a trapped door that had a lock on it. When the lock was clipped, we heard a massive scream

“HELP ME, DON’T HURT ME”

There he was, my four year old brother, beaten black and blue, and crying his eyes out. I instantly started crying and crumbled to my knees. It felt like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders. Lucas was scared to even look at me. It had been near a month that he was missing.

Shelly Steven’s admitted that she kidnapped Lucas at the park for the sole reason to make up for her lost child; she even stated that Lucas was her dream child and wanted to raise him as her own. Robert Stevens claims he had no involvement in the kidnapping. The case being solved brought an extended amount of joy to my family and the people around us, yet I feel that things will never be the same as they were.

Shelly Stevens pled guilty to kidnapping and received a 25 to life sentence.

She then committed suicide in her cell 5 years into her sentence.

Robert Stevens pled not guilty to the kidnapping but was found guilty and received 15 years.

Robert ended up dying in his cell due to heart attack at age 74.