#but ive had alot of good stuff happen too!

[ossydrawsthingz335]

i find it funny that so many adults talk about how bad the internet is for teens but like ive made so many more friends because of the internet and like the internet made me so much more confident in my art and myself

like of course theres bad ppl on the internet. theres bad ppl irl. bad ppl exist. its crazy i know.

the only age group that shouldnt be on the internet is little kids. like 8-7-etc years old.

[ronkeyroo]

How do you call it when you want to sigh deeply but in a pleasant way but also scream and slam the wall at the same time but also you generally feel good but like STUFF STILL BUGS YOU and there are alot of intrusive memories and bad people you want to literally turn into paste but also you already came to terms that they’re nobodies and my life looks so much better now without their garbage presence and i’ve been super productive too??? finishing two wonderful sculptures and commission work and had a gorgeous meal with my wonderful partner AND THE DAY WAS WONDERFUL BUT IT STILL FEELS BITTERSWEET AND I STILL WANT TO AHGHFGGGHHHHHH

[serejae]

I STILL WANNA BE YOUR FAVORITE BOY | C.HS

pairing ; vernon x reader

WHAT ! ; after rejecting his bestfriend vernon is left to ponder in what he lost, now its up to him whether to make things right

a/n ; i know ive been writing alot for vernon buttttttttt whos gonna fight me..😒

VERNON swore he didnt care, if anyone asked about you he shrugged it off. the news of you confessing to vernon wasn’t shocking to anyone, the way you two looked at eachother explained everything but the part that shocked them was when he said he rejected you.

“so what? you just rejected them?” dokyeom asked sitting in front of vernon on the floor as he laid on the couch. not bothering to look up from his phone, vernon shrugged

“yeah

i dont get the big deal everyones making out of it”

“the big deal is that we all know you like them and we’re trying to protect you from regretting anything” dokyeom sighed. all he got back ad a response was a light chuckle from guy sitting on the couch. “i’ll be fine, you guys dont need to be so worried about the decisions i make”

“what if you regret it?”

he looked away from his phone for a second and thought before shaking his head.

“nah”

nah

nah

nah

now vernon was sitting at his dining table with his now cold mac n cheese infront of him. the word “nah” was constantly repeating in his hand like a broken record trying to overpower dokyeom words of regret, because maybe he was right

and vernon hated to admit it

that he had fell for his bestfriend

and especially when he rejected them first and was now feeling something about them going on a date with another person

it was weird, normally you’d stay for dinner and afterwards you both would cuddle onnthe couch while watching a movie (always of your choice) to digest, then go cuddle in bed and go to sleep. (with the many years of knowing eachother and getting comfortable with one another) its no surprise you fell for him, and he fell for you too

so it was like something, or someone…was missing tonight

the table was too quiet, too much room, he didnt like it, at all.

but vernon was too selfless for his own good to stop you now. you’re already hurt by him, so why would you want someone like him to come back to your life again?

closing his eyes, he rubs his temples as he thinkings about what happened that day. he didnt think you deserved someone like him the day you confessed to him

-

“just tell me who you like” vernon stretched out his words as he leaned towards you trying to bother you

shaking your head as you laughed, you tried to push him off but he was too persistent in bothering you

“cmon, ill help you” he said trying to convince you to at least give him a hint

��would you?”

vernon nodded his head quickly hoping your answer would be him, but why when it wss did he reject you?

“i like you”

he paused feeling his heart quicken, and out of adrenaline

“im sorry, i dont like you”

-

in his defense, the idea is much scarier than the reality. the moment he said yes, you would be stuck with him and his problems. so not wanting to hurt you he rejected you

so now why were you and him hurting?

the cold mac n cheese was now stored in the fridge as he lost his appetite thinking of you doing the same stuff you did with him to other people, let alone go on a date.

he wish he could change something about this.

so thats when it clicked

he can

grabbing a sweater and putting on his shoes he ran to his car trying to get their as soon as possible

-

well, the reality is much scarier than the idea because hes been standing outside your door for 10 minutes walking in circles while simultaneously looking around to see if any cars were pulling up to your drive way indicating your date

even then, if they did show up what was he gonna do?

beat them up?

well, maybe not.

but before they arrived and swooned your heart away, vernon hoped deep down that your heart still belonged to him.

as selfish as it sounded, maybe vernon needed to be selfish to get this one thing he wants

to be your favorite boy

not some random person.

so before his time was up he knocked on your door

and within seconds you opened it, looking as shocked as he did.

and his first words to you? (rather sighed knowing dokyeom was right)

“i still wanna be your favorite boy”

[pawl3ss]

I came here to be a hater and hate on the minecraft movie trailer.

Get ready because this is probably the longest and the most autistic post ive made so far

I wont talk about the weird cgi and how unprofessional it looks but about how inaccurate the trailer is because it pisses me off and I have to be a nerd about it <3

ALSO IM NOT SURE IF TUMBLR WILL LET ME POST ALL OF THIS IN ONE POST so if it doesnt ill reblog with the rest <:3

first of all, those are NOT minecraft mountains.

Yes such seeds exist and you can find smt like that super easily in the game but it does NOT look so blocky

It should be a bit more smooth like here ⬆️

Next, what the fuck happened to the flowers.

Alot of the plants, trees, etc look like a disrespectful rip off of minecraft

Talking about plants, the trees are a big wtf

On the first pic you can see the log is SO THIN. LIKE THINNER THAN A TOOTHPICK. In the second you can see it is thicker, but because the block that fell out is so Itty bitty, you have to make the tree thinner.

The tree is as wide as the players, and when the block falls out its bigger than whatever the fuck this is. Yes I understand they have to carry the blocks and they can't make it too big, but you know what's a good solution? - make the blocks bigger when they fall out, but make them shrink when they get close/get put into a chest or inventory. SO EASY

Also I know you can find pink sheep naturally in the game, but oh come on.

You want to show how sPeCiAl the characters are and that they're sOoOoOo special they found a pink sheep on their spawn but oh my God you could have just let it be a normal sheep.

We stay with animals, and WHAT HAPPENED TO THE POOR WOLF. THE SNATCHED WAIST???? WHAT DID YOU DO TO HIM ☹️

and why is the creeper so, fluffy. Creepers are NOT made out of fur they are made of what alot of minecraft players suspect rotten skin like zombies or a skin-alike material, but it is NOT fur.

Also, *wrong buzzer sound* llamas don’t just spawn naturally. Unless theres a wandering trader (or however theyre called in english) they aren’t able to spawn just like that. They also usually have the carpet on their back.

EDIT: TURNS OUT THEY DO SPAWN NATURALLY IN MOUNTAIN BIOMES. still the Llama being here looks like they just put her there to try and "be funny" ykwim?

I also wanted to also say, this one character I feel that they're gonna be the most stereotypical, annoying one out of the whole movie and my ears hurt just looking at them

I wanted to say that the portal shouldn't be blue but like. Only the nether portal is purple, it's unknown how other portals look so... yeah

But still wtf is this cube??? What's the fuck are you holding young man???

Also, talking about mobs, piglins dont look like that, they dont have red light in their eyes, they dont have those drum-things because THEY DONT EVEN EXIST IN MINECRAFT which i will get to latur. They aren’t able to build like that, they aren’t able to get wood for trapdoors and for the fences and iron for the chains. Also they do not even know how to craft, they probably domt even know what a crafting table is. And ghasts also aren’t able to be in the overworld. I understand that theyre invading the land ans taking over but still Like Cmon >:(

I also wanted to say that this is not how nether looks but like. It does a bit, like where the piglins usually spawn ykwim? so ill give them that, the nether looks alr

Anyway TALKING ABOUT THINGS THAT DONT EXIST IN MINECRAFT: whatever this is, it isnt craftable in minecraft, unless there are mods installed. But the „mods” excuse can be used for everything in this post. It was the first thing i saw that pissed me off so badly that i had to make this post because like JUST USE ALL THE STUFF THAT THE ORIGINAL FRANCHISE HAS TO OFFER! NORMAL BUCKETS WOULD PROBABLY WORK JUST FINE!

Last but not least, if you think those two are the same character ive got some bad news for you buddy.

At least dye his beard brown. At least get the colours right. Please.

I think i mentioned everything i wanted. Lets hope the movie will get fixed or will turn out to be at least a bit better.

Thank you for letting me get nerdy about it <3

[averageludwig]

i need to thank you endlessly for drawing demoman in a kilt where you obviously paid attention to what they actually look like here, ESPECIALLY THANK YOU for NOT calling it a skirt. i am a scottish transmasc (legit scot, opposed to “american with 0 connection besides a great gran and drinks whisky sometimes” scot. happens a lot over there afaik), and im so tired cuz getting a kilt for the first time and wearing it in front of my family of 100 people or something? it was the biggest milestone ive had so far (was sobbing in joy in all our gatherings photos n stuff).

like dawg you can put him in a skirt!!! dont just shit on another cultures history and view. it sucks to have people erase an important trans thing yfm? idk. imwear skirts too, but getting my measurements done properly and picking out the tartan with my family was the happiest moment id had then trans-wise. sucks when people living/from the US project femininity onto all of it

either way. thank u. cause it made my mf transgender day. i am overjoyed

So sorry for the late reply but i am so so glad you are happy with how i draw kilts!!! I try to research as best as i can and make the patterns look as good and it means alot that you love it!!!!!!!!!! You are super cool and I am proud of you btw ❤❤❤❤❤❤

[camzverse]

sorry I'm evil 🍦 or 🩸🐰 in a blorbo moment

YAAAAY MWAHAHAHA>.... my girls ever oh em gee

🍦elizabeth<2

-ive always interpreted her as the youngest afton

-she follows her older siblings and parents around like a little puppy :3 after evan dies she does this especially more with mike and will (much to their dismay. she gets clinger whereas they get more self-isolating,, NOT a good combo in the end)

-she likes to draw and makes drawings as gifts for people she likes :) mostly to evan and charlie !! those were like her best friends idc idc

-she tried out dance classes but she quit only a few weeks in

-fs fs owns at least one cabbage patch doll. on that note she has a loot of dolls !! she used to get all the fazbear plush toys before they came out :o) not for long though. william was too,, Busy. to get her more toys. sometimes she goes into evans old room to play with his toys. she likes to pretend shes playing with him

-her favorite part of freddys is the stage area/the animatronic performances !!!

🩸🐰 vanessa / vanny !!!1!!11

-ness likes 2000s stuff alot ^_^

-vanessa gamer realness btw. psychological horror and vns and rhythm games and fighting games r her Jam. she wouldve loved yume nikki </2

-i think she made a couple small games before :) in college or smth idk

-she wasnt originally from utah. i think maybe she lived somewhere like california before but then she moved away both for work and to get away away from her dad yk

-she put in rainbow streaks during fnaf ar to hint to luis that shes gay asf and he needs to stop hitting on her without having to say it. it did NOT work but she kept them anyway. at least until glitch decided it was drawing too much attention to her and she needed to take them out

-she owns at least one tamagotchi i think she would love those things

-the design for her vanny suit was based off an oc/fursona she made when she was a kid. when she was little she used that character as a sort of escapism so she could pretend to have a happier sillier freer life than the one she actually had

OK THATS ALL FOLKS <2 and by all i mean all i will put here in this post. i probably have way more. u just happened to pick two of my favorite fnaf characters everr

[huenistar]

hey, I’m the pink haire anon. Can I ask you more about your txt DR and K-pop DRs in general? I just got into K-pop shifting. I used to be a furry and wanted to shift into being a wolf, howl, and shit like that, and get bred by my big alpha mate. I’ve outgrown that lowkey, but I’m into K-pop now. So, can you talk to me about your DRs—like what to script or just yappe about it? feel free to mention anything random you think is nice to script.

ooo okay (i love yapping abt my txt dr)

so my stage name is min and i know alot of languages and stuff and omg i want to yap about hueningkai so badly

ive had a crush on him the moment i saw him up till now (im shifting to january 2024) and hes so sweet and kind i js want to squeeze him into a ball and throw him against the wall, he also likes me buttt i dont know that :33

ALSO WE START DATING AFTER MINISODE 3 PROMOTIONS (didnt specify a date js said after minisode 3 promotions but before the next cb)

im super rich (dad is literally the owner (?) of samsung and mom is a famous fashion designer, sister is an actor and brother is an exmodel) so yes i am technically a nepo baby but HEY IM TALENTED AS FUCK

i was born in 2002 (nov 15th) so im the maknae of txt :3

im lowkey too lazy to continue yapping about my dr but if u send another ask i promise to start yapping again🙏

some stuff to script

- you dont get tired of your voice (youll be listening to ur song 24/7)

- you have good stamina

- u dont sweat/ if u do sweat it doesn’t smell bad and it smells like (scent)

- staff are nice and ur company is good

- ur songs always win soty

- ur fancams are always high quality

- (only girl in bg) ur voice fits even if it’s a higher pitch, ur not called a pick me, even though theres a girl in ur group u still count as a boy group

- stage malfunctions, outfit malfunctions, voice cracks, etc rarely/never happen

- ur fandom isnt toxic

- you can hit any note

- u have perfect pitch

thats all i have on my minds

[rudywashere]

MARI ANALYSIS (sorta)

NOTE: these are just my personal thoughts about mari’s personality and flaws and most of the proves and reasons i give and show are mostly based off my own interpretation of mari + me projecting myself because she’s a heavykin of mine whagwjswvskegskshq most of the points may sound squishy too because i just copied and pasted everything here while i was talking to my friend at that time

!!!!! AND OBVIOUSLY THERES GONNA BE SPOILERS OF OMORI!!!!!

So many people know and love mari for being the perfect older sister of sunny and overall an older sisterly figure to the rest of the group (except hero of course hahsga) and i am one of those people that love her because of it. despite me heavy kinning her i do have an issue with her character that is kinda being left out whenever people talk abt mari: she barely has any flaws

and whenever the group talked about mari they mostly discussed how perfect she was and how she was literally an angel because of how sweet she is!!! like don’t get me wrong obviously when someone you loved so much dies you can’t think of any negative traits about the person who passed away. you just constantly think about the positive memories you’ve shared with that person. It’s just impossible to think about the negative traits about a beloved one who passed away.

But still even as a mari kinnie myself it kind of bothered me how no one talked about her flaws and such. We all just saw mari as someone who is an older sisterly figure and how perfect she is. The closest we’ve gotten to a flaw of Mari is this

Mari wants to be so perfect that she gets disappointed so quickly when something isn’t good enough for her or doesn’t go according to her plan. That’s it. And whenever people talk about her flaw they mostly associate it with when Mari and Sunny had the fight because Sunny was too pressured thanks to Mari’s perfectionism

PLEASE HOLD ON TO ME IVE GOT A POINT!! Like mari cares ALOT that she HAS to be presented in a perfect manner or else she’ll be unsatisfied. Remember when mari took extra classes to be fully prepared for college??

She did all of it because she really wants to be fully prepared for college. okay now here comes the copy and paste stuff HAVSHAH

If you think abt the college part again mari chose to do these extra classes to be 100% prepared for college and have a perfect start for it because she fears that if she isn’t prepared enough for college, she would fail and failing would not fit her at all because she wants people to see her as a person who can deal with anything and is very independent. It fits to her “perfect status”. So i can see whenever something happens that could even mess some small things up she’ll get frustrated IMMEDIATELY and tries to fix it by herself because Mari is someone who doesn’t want to rely on others. She wants to handle everything by herself.

Personally I think it all started when people started to rely on Mari (mostly the younger ones/the kids that aren’t hero) and start telling her they see her as a motherly/older sisterly figure and mari was so happy to hear it that she doesn’t want to disappoint everyone by failing. So to keep up that title so she will do her best for the sake of not disappointing people. It’s really important to her but also for her friends and Sunny because she cares about them so much.

You could think that Mari’s biggest fear is either the thought of failing itself or disappointing everyone else surrounding her. And I also think that Mari is someone who fears major changes too like MASSIVE changes.

She is someone who wants everyone and everything to stay happy and nice as it has always been. So even the smallest mistake could be horrifying to her and ruin everything, which is why she has to keep everything perfect and make sure everything stays exactly how it is right now. For the sake of her friends’ precious life.

I think the fear of major changes may had hit her SO HARD when she passed away because ever since she died the group had split up, Sunny didn’t leave his house for four entire years and almost everyone isn’t exactly how they used to be. (Aubrey becoming an aggressive person with lots of built up anger or Hero becoming extremely lonely and depressed, having no real desire to keep up)

And because Mari doesn’t want to rely on others and instead lets everyone else rely on her, she doesn’t want to blame anyone for anything that has happened. I remember one specific scene where Sunny looked around in his house and there was some dialogue to a vase that was something like: “A replacement of the vase you have accidentally broken. Mari took the blame for you and said she broke it.”

Hell Mari didn’t even want to blame Sunny for her own death. She instead blames herself. Because of one little mistake she has done. And that mistake was pushing her perfectionism way too hard for the sake of not wanting to disappoint everyone else especially at the upcoming recital. And to think she died while facing one of her worst fears is honestly extremely upsetting for me. Man

Like Mari tried everything from preventing to make something NOT happen only to happen in one of the worst ways possible. Pushing her perfectionism so hard to the of the mistakes she has caused leading her into her own death. And the major changes she has caused to everyone else but also to the friendgroup itself because of it.

I can see why she would take the whole blame for herself and not even dare to make Sunny feel guilty about it. Not only because he’s her little brother but also because she is someone who wants to be responsible. And someone who didn’t want to disappoint everyone else.

PHEWWWWWW

TO SUM IT UP mari is someone who fears failure, little mistakes and especially major changes and her death had made her face those fears. and it’s all thanks to her wanting to be perfect and a reliable, responsible person who’d do anything to make the friend group stay together!!! I really wish omocat wouldve shown more of her flaws in the game and show her “not perfect” nature too!! and her friends would still love her even though she can’t stay perfect forever!!! but she’d still be very very nervous about it!!! again that could be mostly me projecting myself onto her because i heavykin her HAVSGAHSHAH anyways uhmmm if you have read all of it im gonna be SOOO HAPPY ABOUT IT AYAYAYAYA and if not that’s fine too!!’ :D

take care and stay healthy!!!! <333

[senseioftheseidiots]

Me with Canon Wu: You let your brother go get your stuff for you and look what happened. You made a 'friend' of a Serpentine and taught her something you shouldn't have and looked what happen ! You filled a young child's mind up with dreams and broke them down and look what happened !! And even now with the Ninja, you don't tell them a single warning before they go into battle and LOOK WHAT'S STILL HAPPENING !! And after all of that, I find myself-!! Me with Your Wu:...still coming back here even though I shouldn't because you really need help with your issues and everyone makes mistakes and your superior- Nah, nah, I'm kidding but in all seriousness, your version is kind of what I want to believe for the character now. I don't hate on the original Wu since you can't beat the original but you also can't beat the fanon ! So with lots of love, enjoy making more content for him !

This has been sitting in my asks because I completely forgot about it- so ill use this as a headcanon dump, thankyou >:) You throw out alot of points here on the segment for canon wu, so let me throw in things ive held onto in hc to all of it PLEASE NOTE MOST IF NOT ALL OF THESE IS HC ALONE/TIMELINE SPECULATION "You let your brother go get your stuff for you and look what happened." This happened AFTER the meet with aspheera I believe, after it happened the two were forbidden to go outside monastery walls without permission, completely isolating them from the outside world in hopes nothing like that would happen again. Wu at this point was incredibly afraid to disobey his father because if their punishment from last time was isolation from a world outside their monastery, what more could happen to them? [it only got worse from there, but we arent talking about that yet.] "You made a 'friend' of a Serpentine and taught her something you shouldn't have and looked what happen !" Wu genuinely just wanted to be friends with someone, being the sons of god the fsm was rather picky on who exactly got to see the two. And he's never made proper connections until now, through out the entirety of their childhood [before teens] im pretty sure all wu knew as companionship was his brother, and when he found someone willing to help them, he didnt want to think about the warnings for the chance that she might actually be good, and that keeping a promise was the way to gain a friend " You filled a young child's mind up with dreams and broke them down and look what happened !! " If were talking about morro here, ANOTHER HC TIME to fuel my delulu state, look- He didnt WANT him to fight garmadon, hear me out here- if you go back to the scene of morro being tested to be the green ninja, the sword of fire ISNT the sword of fire. My hc here is this is the ONE time he's tried to change destiny for the better. It doesnt mean morro was destined, no, this was going to happen either way, but he tried changing destiny because this wasnt morro's fight, and he was afraid of what may need to come if it DID end up being him that was destined. He didnt want that. But when he did do it and got his own student killed [he tried finding him. he tried getting him back, he didnt want to come back.] He gave up. And this is where his mindset solidified, he couldnt change destiny, people will die, and itll be his fault. This was his fathers punishment for him. " And even now with the Ninja, you don't tell them a single warning before they go into battle and LOOK WHAT'S STILL HAPPENING !! " This one is funny to me cause, one, wu doesnt know how to fucking trauma dump I dont think he would even be able to think about it unless someone asks him, its actually the 'it never came up' thing. BUT, he wouldnt want to say much too quickly due to Morro's incident. Hell he didnt even want the ninja to see the green ninja scroll. If he had said too much too quickly, well theyll either turn evil or die..or both-

" .still coming back here even though I shouldn't because you really need help with your issues and everyone makes mistakes and your superior- " Hehe, thank you!!! I hope you enjoy the buncha headcanons i have here for you

[iersei]

THANK YOU for being able 2 put it into words on that post..... despite s2 having so much of my favorite characters (terry jr and scary) i just... have struggled so hard with caring since the seasons been in full swing and it feels like the world in s2 isnt taken as like... genuinely enough i guess? and season two is very funny and entertaining but thats... all it is. any emotional arcs feel quickly forgotten & almost not at all drawn out and it feels like a mess with how often characters are just straight up forgotten,,, i love dndads and there was such a great setup for season two that i think just. fell flat in execution. even when nicky came back anthony admitted he called him nick Foster because he wasnt thinking at all about it and didnt care, and like. at a certain point even in a d&d setting you have to care about the characters youre making plot relevant at least a little bit, and suddenly the close family arc had nothing to do with season 1 and instead everything to do with stuff that happened completely offscreen (and again, once the dads were charting around with their kids they were often forgotten & added little to any scenes) just. it all got a little careless.

and im not caught up but ive heard about so much junk that happens in the... less than 10 episodes im behind on?? like i JUST got to the titanic part and it ends, what, 9 episodes later ??? i just wish it was more organized and theyd allowed themselves to like. take their time with things. i know the 20 or whatever episodes of glenns arc in s1 is known as 'too long' or super hard to get through but thats also how it made such an impact!! there was ALOT to get through and a lot happened to the close family. yet when alot happens in s2 its like, well that happened, and in an episode and a half it will never be mentioned again . even supporting npcs especially with a lot of potential dont stick around unlike characters like paeden or walter or even erin who got her own wrap up like. i dont remember the last time anyone even mentioned mae hails. yeah theres a degree that its messy and unorganized because thats how teenagers are but theres only so far that goes. and im pretty forgiving in d&d settings because 90% of what actually happens is up to random chance but theres a difference between 'this isnt good because im not actually writing it, and i dont have total control over this story' versus 'this isnt that good because we're not playing it that good'.

anyways. um. hero oak swallows garcia i hope i see you again soon 👍

I THOUGHT YOU HAD TO BE JOKING ABOUT HOW RECENT THE TITANIC WAS UNTIL I WENT BACK TO CHECK THE EPISODE LIST AND. NO. NO, YOU WEREN'T JOKING. THERE'S ONLY 10 EPISODES AFTER THE TITANIC IN THE WHOLE SEASON. WHAT THE FUCK.

these kids really never had any time to rest, and it's actively hurting the narrative tension to the point that i just want them to be left alone </3

i can't fucking believe that they didn't care enough about nicky's whole deal to not even think about the implications of everything that happened to him. that felt like it should've been a core aspect of his character! and they just didn't care!! about that aspect of his family dynamic!!

i think that, at the end of season 1, the close family and the oak family had dynamics where it was understandable for issues to pop up offscreen. and i do think the underlying threads made sense to a degree! but it was so thoroughly unexplored in both families that it just made even more of a mess and all the characters involved suffered for it.

and i'm gonna be honest. i completely forgot about mae hails. man. man.

they all deserved so much better.

[stellawolfearts]

ive totally not been stalking your blog and noticed you have some actually good nezha angst content! which like nobody has ;-;

im sorry if you have already done this, but drop your angsty nezha hc's here? basically any angsty hc's for him you want ig

LOL THANKS, i actually haven't done that yet, just sprinkle ideas here ad there for people to read.

alright *cracks knuckles* angsty Nezha hc's here we go. buckle up cause theres gonna be ALOT.

TW--- mentions of child abuse, self-harm, suicide and violence. if u know Nezha's mythology then you know what im talking about. even if you dont Be cautious reading this i will highlight the suicide andself harm stuff in red. the child abuse is all the first half of this post

most of the first part is based off of Nezha's mythology in investiture the gods, some are creative liberties.

Nezha is literally a neurodivergent kid who has been told to stop doing the things he does bc there're 'annoying', 'rude', or 'weird'. which... their not. he just does things differently because he's neurodivergent.

no one was ever nice about telling him to do things differently. or...'normally'. he was always told off in a negative sense. it was straight-up child abuse.

of course back then it wasnt seen as child abuse much, since neurodivergancy wasnt a thing they knew about nezha was just a troublesome child, a burden. and in nezhas eyes no matter how much he tried, no matter what he did he was never enough. he was convinced that he was a mistake and a dissapointment. born with so much potential only to be thwarted by his "troublesome nature"

this "troublesome nature" was just normal neurodivergent things. normal kid things. but no one ever considered that, the only one that did was his mom. she was nicer then the rest of his family. not the greatest of course but compared to the others she understood that he was a child.

i heard its implied somewhere his father wouldnt let him out of the house for the first seven years of his life. Nezha had to sneak out and his mother would call him back inside whenever his father came back home.

one day while outside he met a man with orange hair, bright like the sun in the sky. A man with kind eyes a soft voice. the complete opposite of his father. the man stayed in the village for a few days. he kept nezha company and for once. nezha felt...safe.

but he had to leave sooner or later. even so the man promised to come back (it was wukong on his journey for immortality, disguised as a human)

his father was very picky on the way things were done, Nezha sometimes did things differently or hell probably forgot often. because ynow....hes a kid. but often that wasnt enough. there were times his father was angry, very angry. and instead of being a fucking adult about it he let it out onto Nezhas shortcomings. screaming fits, throwing things. and Nezha had to stand still, 'take it like a man' despite being a literal child. until his father was done poking and prodding at every little 'flaw' Nezha had.

all he wanted was to make his family proud.

then the dragon thing happened.

he just wanted to play with his friends.

he just wanted to protect his friends.

he just wanted to be a kid

he just wanted to do the right thing.

in a last-ditch effort to keep any blame off of his family, to keep his village safe from the dragon's wrath he took a sword at twelve years old and killed himself. offering his dead body as compensation.

he was 12

he was a child.

the man with orange hair came back and asked about Nezha. he was too late.

when he was reincarnated into a lotus body those scars remained. Scars on his hands from grabbing onto the blade and making his hands bleed. scars on his chest from....yeah, he has one on his left arm, stretching across his upper to lower arm and a shorter one on his right upper arm. both were accidental. and one on his neck.

the ones on his neck and chest were not accidental.

im not going into detail but....yeah.

His lotus body...its not exactly fit for him.

his powers i mean.

its too much.

remember how bai he's body started to crack and break due to being too weak for lbd's powers.

okay think of that but nezha in his god form.

if he uses that form for too long his body will crack until it finnaly shatters and nothing is left but a single lotus flower.

thats Nezha.

he's regenerating.

to keep this from happening too often he uses alot of weapons.

no one in heaven knows of this weakness.

Nezha began working in heaven after the whole.....trying to kill his father thing.

Context: his father destroyed a temple nezha's mother had built for nezhas soul to rest in so when nezha was reincarnated he wanted revenge.

anyways

Nezha did not have a good time working in heaven. he was 12 and...well lets just say the lotus body didnt exactly look. godlike. so over the course of a few years he use glamor and transformation magic to change his appearance. to not only look more godlike but older as well. that way people would respect him. no one would consdescend him. no one would have a reason to yell at him or poke and prod at his weaknesses.

his body doesnt grow. he's stuck the same way he was when he died.

its not a bad thing.

its really not.

he can be the child he was never allowed to be.

but he doesn't let himself be that.

he works and he works and he works.

desperate to earn respect.

desperate for people to no longer look down on him.

so he pretends to be an adult.

on one hand theres nothing really wrong with his older form, its the reason he has it thats the problem.

he stays in his older form most of the time bc...well come on. being a kid isnt always great.

despite the fact that he doesnt grow he is mature.

thousands of years of living will do that.

hes still a kid but he has many years of experience.

so being in his older form isnt a bad thing, it helps him do things that would be harder in his normal form.

like reaching tall places.

(even though he is mature due to years of experience and transforms to look older my nezha is still a child please respect this)

or fighting.

anyways

he was there when swk was punished. he didnt like any of it. at first he thought swk was just a troublesome demon but then...then he started seeing what was really going on.

it reminded him too much of his own experience.

he didnt like any of it. and when the burning of ffm happened he only pretended to join the fight. he even managed to face swk for a moment.

only for them to finally recognize each other. Swk knew this was the child from a home of thunder and lightning. Nezha knew this was the man of the sun with kind eyes.

Nezha was injured and swk told him to run and where to hide for the time being.

after it was all over...Nezha was forced to watch as swk...the only man to ever show him true kindness. the only man he feels safe around...was tortured by heaven.

he hated every second of it and to this day it haunts his nightmares. all of it. ffm. the torture, the furnace. for the following 500 years he was under the mountain Nezha had nightmares about swk blaming him for not freeing him.

worst 500 years of his life.

so much guilt.

and he already has so much on his shoulders that he is still learning how to handle.

after the journey they met up again. Nezha could barely stand to talk to him. the guilt clawing at his throat and thumping in his chest.

swk seemed cheery as ever though.

nezha invited him to tea at his home.

he moved out of his families place bc "hes an adult"

he just needed to get away from his father.

swk accepted.

it was nice for a moment. just a little bit.

then swk mentioned the elephant in the room.

he saw nezha and how horrified he looked during...that.

he wanted to ask nezha if he's okay.

for a moment nezha was silent. couldnt bear to meet his eyes.

then all the glamors and transformations fell.

every wall he'd built and fortified over the past thousand years crumbled and for once he finally let himself cry.

like a child.

swk dropped whatever he was holding (poor teacup) and immediately held the poor suffering child in front of him.

dad

Swk is dad

that day Nezha spent the rest of the afternoon letting out everything he had been holding inside. so much for someone so young.

that was the day swk adopted nezha.

nezha didnt know he was adopted swk just started showing up to his temple more often.

when swk told nezha, nezha laughed thinking it was a joke, then he got a little angry. nezha thinks he can take care of himself. he can...but he's not exactly very good at self care. swk told him he doesnt wanna coddle nezha. just... be there when he really needs it. be that person that nezha can run to when everything becomes too much.

nezha cried again.

so. yeah.

thats nezha.

he hides who he truly is from celestial eyes. working endlessly to become the perfect image of a celestial god. doing everything he can to seem perfect and untouchable. strong and unbreakable.

Swk has a room in every home he owns thats set up for Nezha to rest in whenever he needs.

Nezha and swk's dynamic doesnt exactly change much like in the show. Nezha doesnt exactly like how much Swk acts like a goofball. he's less tolerant of it around other people. then goes to ffm with him ranting about how swk is a king, a high ranking individual with alot of power. he should act more like it.

all, while he's in his true form and sits on swk's shoulders.

all while he and swk sit beside a river and lets swk braid flowers into his hair and then eat fruit on a cliff as the sun sets for dinner.

then nezha falls asleep on swk's side and she carries him home and tucks him into bed.

FFM, is a safe haven for nezha when he needs it.

swk is a safe person. the only person who ever sees his true form.

when nezha was assigned to protect the samadhi fire he felt as if he finally had the respect he's been working towards.

he stopped visiting swk as often bc of his duties.

he still visited just. not as often as before.

even so, they are father and son. nothing can change that

for more info heres some links to other posts where i talk about nezha. its mostly for au's but alot of it is also within my own hc's and not just au's

im picking out the angst ones just for u

general hc's masterpost(wip)

Nezha and his Monkey dad

Fragility

he's not good at self care

1Mother?

2Mother?

Picky eater

Sick

Unconditionally

They didn't deserve you

anyways this was fun to make. thanks mercy ive been meaning to talk about all of this for a while now

[olderthannetfic]

https://www.tumblr.com/olderthannetfic/724520280283856896/im-gonna-be-honest-i-think-people-need-to-chill?source=share

To all those comments

Yes i do forget my cis friends pronouns. Especially when they are suddenky trying something new.

But the thing is i dont have visual indicators for alot of them, and it wouldnt matter if i did because someones looks dont determine their pronouns. All my friends are online or penpals. Sometimes i get voice but that doesnt mean shit when i cant remember who is talking half the time. Or that i remeber the persons whos talkings pronouns

Alot of my online friends have their like... Birth pronounss aswell as something else. Some of them prefer the other thing. Mate im in a discord server i cannot remember every single persons pronouns in there.

Some of my friends put their pronouns in their username. And that helps, sometimes ill remember it longer because of the repitition of seeing it. But even then i am still able to forget it. Its harder when im focusing on a game and not able to focus on remembering someones pronouns.

For my pen pals we spend so much time emailing or mailing eachother that we dont even talk about pronouns. Our own pronouns rarely ever even come up ive even had ny first one admit they forgot mine and was too afraid to ask at that point and avoided it at all costs because theyvdidntvwant to risk lossing me as a friend. It wasnt a big deal.

And you know what? They dont have so much of a problem with it as yall do. I forget things. All the time i forget things. Most of my friends also have disorders or disabilities of somekind so they understand. I just forget things.

Sometimes i have to look back at discord to see the name of whoever is talking to me. Like i said i forget peoples names.

Im sorry yall cant understand that i really do forget things.

And even then. Even if my memory werent so trash. People forget things all the time. Even people with a good memory. Sometimes you get so absorbed in something your talking too fast and focusing on something that you use the wrong pronouns for someone or who your talking to. This happens to one of my friends occasionally.

Its not a big deal. My pronouns get forgottem all the time too. Honestly i dont care personally about it becaise i prefer to be called by my name instead. Newer people get my pronouns wrong all the time. Its nit a big deal. Hell i dont even know if my sister even knows what my pronouns are.

I get that it can be frustrating. I do try. But i cannot help it if i cant remeber something.

"just ask" i do. But sometimes i dont think before i talk or think ive remebered them correctly and i get them wrong.

As someone with the worst memory on earth, you can tell whos doing it on purpose and who has actually just forgotten.

Also thanks for jumping to conclusions and getting mad because you cant comprehend the life of someone other than yourself. I have bigger problems than remembering my friends pronouns specifically. Its not like i dont try to remember them, but like with everything else i just forget them. I forget things about my long term friends because our lives and friendship dont revolve around remembering eachothers pronouns and then berating eachother for forgetting. Most of what we do is talk about games or books we read. What shops weve been going to or bad snacks we try. In between all the actaul stuff we do its normal to forget things that arent talked about.

And i prefer it like that rather than some big art discord i tried joining a while back and there was almost twice weekly drama over someone forgetting someones pronouns. That level of stress and worry over pronouns is not normal for anyone. And. Yeah some of those times it was people dping it on purpose bit most of them from what i saw was usually teenagers antagonizing others for not focusing their entire life on what pronouns they were using. Even when someone apologized it wasnt enough. It was disgusting to see and stressful.

Idk what to tell any of you.

--

Frankly, I think a lot of the disagreements are actually over what 'friends' implies.

[docilepillow]

MARCH 2024 MEDIA DIARY 2

I ran out of embed space on the first post i had slotted in for this!!! So i'm making two posts!!!!!!! They belong together!!!! Okay!!!!!!! PIZZA TOWER < this game is soggy goop >

Even though I cleared a good portion of this game nigh a year ago now, i still feel compelled to put it on my media diary now, as i've only just got around to finishing the game properly! I believe the point i dropped off the game before was at Pig City, which, i think , is kinda understandable given how big that level is, but, was probably a real bummer for the whole of my friend group who were super into the game when it was new and i probably missed out on talking about it alot with them... POOP!!!! just because this game is popular enough to actually warrant talking about it with my friends later, instead of saying stuff like how i enjoyed the silly cartoony art stlye and the games general charm, im just going to post a level tier list i made the second i beat the game at like near midnight kinda hazy-minded without thinking on it too hard without thinking too deeply in a way thatll be completely inflamitory bc im mostly satisfied with the experience i had and dont really feel the urge to P rank anything --

The stats are saying my total hours round up to 6 hours 50 and pepinno is pointing at me Aughh

My , , Errr, " CRITISISM " of this game is that the funny pizza man is a little, erm, STICKY? Kinda gross. a little weird. Partially my fault. I'm sowwy. I'm not very good at this game but i absolutely respect everyone's opinion on it . Go watch my friend @shoppncart's speedrun, by the way, it's cool :

Speedy! THE MARIO MOVIE < the bario boooby geheheheheheheh >

this is probably a tired opinion but since i was subjected to this movie for the fifth time in a voice call my take is thaat this is probably more enjoyablel then the safeass illumination film. like. yea. that films probably objectively better but. id rather watch something thats an actual adaptation. like this movie. where basically nothing mario happens outside names . Aw. i honestly think this movie has intrigue to it genuinely maybe im saying this bc its one of the movies ive actually watched repeatedly before, like roger rabbit, but i think the history behind this movie and the old anamocity turned-endearment are what make it worth watching. that and its a little goopy You Guys Wanna See Some MM2 Proggys? not a new piece of media technically but ive been playing a fuckton of MM2 recently still as of the end of the month and its absolutely dominating my time as of late, and i kinda wanna show off a small amount of the progress ive made on it, as much as the world map, at least --

It's a media diary. it exists to document MY gaming life. Deal. anyway in regards to it i'm almost finished with the world 4 castle, which is crazy, because before i hadn't even finished world 2, but now i got all of this creative energy in me... If i finish this soon enough, i'd be able to upload it on NSO, so keep your tumpler eyes peeled, mutrals :J I personally like it because theres a theme of aescending on the world map. The space theme in this looks the best, i think.. THE ALCHEMY OF US - HOW HUMANS AND MATTER TRANSFORMED ONE ANOTHER < what the fuck ????? a book ??????? >

yea thats right im reading books this ones actually pretty good apparently a 2020 bestseller though im not in the habit of reading those often so i'll just have to take their word for it on that aspect. i think lifes all about trying new things so around halfway through the month i picked up this cool book i found at my library and got a library card. After reading through it all, i think anecdotally that this book is a very neat read. theres a few sentences that're a little offputting to my young mind but overall the book is filled with alot of cool insight i reccomend checking out if youre the boooky type of person! i think its very good and im glad i picked it out :) i donnu how many of these will be going onto my media diary in the future or anything , but maybe i will if i end up reading more! I'll have to make it up to a friendd for waiting till now to put up something i read here first before that thing she likes. oops.

Volp. OUTSIDE of the traditional media format again, also, are things i largely started on this month but don't think i'll be making all too much more progress in, or if i'm unsure i'll finish what i was doing all in one month- CASTLEVANIA THE ADVENTURE- REBIRTH

POINT OF DROP OFF - STAGE 4 END BOSS REASON BEING - UMMM SORRY I GOT DISTRACTED AND DIED TOO MUCH

castlevania rebirth is a really really cool game. its really cool and im not typing this as fresh as everything else because it was something i picked up for one big sitting earlier in the month. i probably couldve finished it at any point during the week, but simply was too distracted and wanted to do other stuff. It's very cool though, i love the vector sprite art, and there ARE silly stock sound effects everywhere, which is always a big positive for me . I mostly just like how snug the wii classic controller is , and this is a cool game to play it with considering its one of the only non virtual console or old game collection style games available for wii in this exact style ( Not counting the good handful of games that choose to use the wiimote on its side instead. )

over all ill probably sit down and finish this someday soon i just gotta like find time for it whenever next my wii u is plugged in ( it fights for an hdmi slot with my switch and ps4 all the time...! ), and ill probably end up trying to play punch out wii at the same time, given one doesnt dominate my attention over the other. From my understanding they're both short, though, so it shouldnt be too big a deal or obstacle no matter how long i put this off. RANDOM TERRARIA PLAYTHROUGH terraria playthru 1million

ii just really want to see the new terraria update Waaaah... i stopped having fun because i self imposed myself to not use setbonus armor sets at the part of the game where that stops being acceptable anymore so im stopping i think i did get to make another terraria pet though that makes me happy POINT OF DROP OFF - the mechanical bosses

also the most recent thing is

i got too tense and needed to excuse myself after like an hour 30 i cant take too much tension in movies i was really uncomfortable and had to leave to take a breather bc the main character gets put in a really really shitty situation and it was getting hard to watch for my autistic ass

thats enough i think thanks for coming see you next month lol

[wilbur-sloot]

DWT WITH A PREGNANT S/O!!

a/n: there are they/them pronouns used but they are a female/ have female prts if you couldnt tell by the name of this lol :)

TELLING DREAM

you showed him the pregnancy test nervous of he would say thinking it would be something along the lines of ‘what the hell i thought you were on birth control.’ ‘im to young to have a child.’ or even ‘i never even liked you in the first place dating you was just a joke with me and my friends i didnt know you were in love with me.’ but it was nothing like that.

he looked up at you then looked back down at the pregnancy test. “your pregnant?” he asked “yea im really sorry” you said tears in your eyes “i get it id you want to break up with me” you said again tears running down your face.

“baby im not mad at you!” he said as he lifted your chin to look at him. “this is the best news of my life. the person i loves has a mini them inside of them thats amazing news!” he explained happily

DURING THE PREGNANCY

you would always be cuddling patches. she loved coming up and laying on your belly, which made you and dream always smile.

you would be going thorough alot of changes and dream would always be right by your side for whatever happens or anything you need

he saw a pregnancy pillow and decided to buy it for you, which is now your new favourite thing to cuddle with instead of dream.

the dream team was having a movie night and invited you, which you said yes. you brought out your candy cane pillow and started cuddling it in ‘your spot’ on the couch.

“baby i got you some f/s” ( f/s mean’s favourite snack) dream said smiling at you “ooo gimme” you said going over to him and snatching the snacks the n going back to your spot.

“you remind me of a pregnant lady” sapnap says “hmm i wonder why!” you say smirking “whats that supposed to mean?” george asked “well i am pregnant!” you exclaimed

“WHAT?!” sapnap yelled “SINCE WHEN?” goerge asked “a few weeks ago” you said

“im happy for you guys you are going to be good parents” sapnap said

“well…” george said

“shut up!” dream yelled “we know that we are going to be great parents!”

“are we though?” you asked “babe what do you mean?” dream asked

“think about it your only 23 and im only 21 we have been together for what 2-3 years? we arnt married yet we are still young i mean what if we arnt always in love?” you stated

“y/n you think that we arnt always going to be in love?” dream asked

“clay im just saying that things might change and we might not always be in love and the reason why im saying it is because ive seen it with my own eyes. my parents falling out of love and my mom getting cheated on. im just saying i dont want either of us or our kids to go though a divorce its scary especially id your a kid it can traumatise a child and the reason why i know is because that happend to me and i became a wreck i dont want another person to go through that” i said practically crying at this point

“aww love i get that its scary and i dont want that to happen either but thats why we need to have trust ok?” clay said coming over to me and hugging me.

“i love you clay” i said hugging him back

“i love you too y/n” clay replied

when the child is born

you just had the child and are currently holding it. crying but happy tears. (obviously)

“clay shes so cute!” you said

“what are we gonna name her?” dream asked you. you though about it

“what about sage?” you said

“i love it, and i love you” clay said kissing you “look at that thing that you pushed out of your whom, it’s beautiful!”

the smp’s reaction

you just got home and you walked into the house to see george and sapnap right there so happy for you guys. when you walked in you saw all of the smp

“welcome home!” niki said getting up and running over to you. “hi!” you said tiredly.

“how are you feeling? hows the baby is it healthy?” phil asked you also coming up to you taking some stuff for you same as niki. “thank you guy!” you said

you picked up sage and sat down holding her close to you.

“can i hold her?” tubbo asked

“um i need to feed her and she needs to go to sleep but you can hold hee when she sleeps?” you said

“ok!” tubbo said excitedly

you got up and went into you and clay’s shared room and started breast feeding her. all you wanted to do was sleep but noooo your child comes first then clay then your friends then you. thats how things always go.

you knew that you where definitely going to over work yourself but thats ok because you were doing it to your loved ones.

after you where done feeding sage and she fell asleep you went downstairs and into them living room making sure to keep the baby asleep.

“tubbo!” you said as you went over to him.

he gasped happily you let him hold your baby girl. god she was so beautiful. tubbo held her and he was so happy.

“babe come on its time to go to bed you need to sleep come on.” clay said

“no!” you said as you sat down next to niki. “babe please you need some sleep!” he said “im not that tir-” you said cutting yourself off with a huge yawn. “nor tired hun?” clay said laughing

“shut up im fine.” you said “babes if you want we can cuddle and sleep if thats what you want” niki said

“ok come on bed time” you said grabbing niki’s hand going upstairs and into your room. you and niki laid down and you laid on top of her.

“goodnight lets go to sleep” she said as you practically fell asleep in an instant.

a/n: hi!

[rainc0at]

If you had to convince someone to watch lost what arguments would you use?

oooo omg this is such a good question!! im gonna assume that they dont know anything about the show here bc thats. easier to go off i say.

1. drama, drama, drama. besides the obvious "how do we survive on this random island and how do we work to get off?" there's also relationships! and therefore relationship problems! a love triangle, will they-won't they dynamics, and, Big One. soulmates. 💓💓💓 oh, and of course, let's not forget: The Island isn't Normal; what's that sound in the woods? "it killed them all." and, oh yeah, polar bear! there's lots to sink your teeth into! if you don't really like the sci-fi mystery type stuff, you can still really enjoy the show even with just the relationships side of it! and vice versa! (although, if you don't fall for both, id be shocked)

2. Lots to Think About! Lots of Emotions evoked! a huge thing for shows with me is that it sticks in my brain even if ive not watched it in a while, or when ive finished it! lost has that!

3. amazingly fledged out characters!!! we get an insight into every one of them and it's AMAZING. i appreciate it SO much. you get their backstories slowly, meaning you slowly understand each character and their actions more and more. also, great character development!!! (to add to my last point, it makes Thinking about them alot easier! and gives you a Lot you can think about too!)

bonus: attractive cast. everyone in lost is fine. you can be upset with what's happening but at least they're Pretty!

bonus no.2: lost tumblr. i love it over here. even if im not hugely active anymore. it's great 💓💓💓 (also fanfics. ohmygod the fanfics ohmygod. if anyone needs recs oh BOY do i have them! lost writers i love you)

[my-castles-crumbling]

hi! its incredible/intrusive tjoughts anon. honestly its nothing serious i just want advice lol.

so basically i identify as pan(tomantic) and non binary (transmasc).

basically i have this cousin who im REALLY close eith since shes the only family close to my age (we have a year differencs)

basically i do live in a very homophobic place, as i think ive said before but i think that she might be queer (bi specifically)

and here are my proofs:

1) the subtle one being, when its just the both if us watching something all she points out is how beautiful/amazing/gorgeous wtc the women look. nothing abt the guys. (not that im complaining cz women serious do slay)

i know that she also likes men because i remember watching this scene with her and one other cousin where the guy (wesrung a ehite) shirt fell into the water and was coming out (of the water).

me, personally, i was disgusted and i thiught my cousins would share the same opinions. nope. they rewatched the scene twice i think, their eyes were glued onto the screen ans they were both red.

2) the second one being, as ive mentioned before, i am a religious person qnd so is she. but we have this tradition where we go onto the roof and just talk about stuff we normally would never talk about. we basically kid of vent to each other too.

and there we've talked alot about queer people, and being a religious queer person and its clear that our views on the topic are very similar.

(i never bring up queer people bcz im scared of giving myself up, and usually people do not go around asking others abt their opinion on them. and yeah i feel like she was relieved when i explaijed that the last thing i wanted was for them to die)

niw into the veey obvious tells:

3) my cousin and i were bored so i took out markers and we decided to draw on my leg (dont ask me how we decided that that was the best thing to do.) but basically out if everything she couldve drawn, she drew the rainbkw but as a bi flag.

i saw it and when i pointed it out, she kind of looked panicked? so i just left it.

4) this one is like glaringly obvious tell. basically obv everyone knows, the tt algorithm works overtime and honestly i rarely get anything im not interested in.

so me, obv i have short hair, and when im sleeping/when im alone with other women you could easily tell that wtv is happening is not straight cis shit.

but basically i was changing so i just shed off my outer layer, underneath i was wearing this like sleeveless sweater and i had tracksuit bottoms underneath. my hair was oulled back in a half bun.

tell me why she says oh you look like thise masc lesbians in my tiktok fyp.

like FIRSTLY what are the masc lesbians doing on ur feed?? how have you watched them eniugh to know the specific terms??

basically idk if im maybe reading inti this but sometimes i genuinely feel like im going mad and i want to kind of come out ti someone irl cz i litr need someoen to see me, and recognize my efforts.

so. i just need advice, cz she knows quite alit if the terms as well, and ive noticed that homophobic people usually do not. (e.g. my brother does not know anthign other than gay and lesbian and queer cz he likes to throw them out as insukts)

but she does know, not all, but quite a few. (i only know nearky all cz for a while my obsession, idk what people call thus but basically i become obsessed with a tooic, research alot about it and then just leave it?. was like all the different types of labels and which umbrellas they fall under. so ive done alot of research on this matter which actually freaks alot of people out)

ive just realised i actually ramble alot so thankyou for making it this far lol

(also i just got hiccups wriitng this and theyre OISSING ME KFF)

Hi!

I feel like it's a pretty good assumption that your cousin is open-minded. I think it might be a good idea, next time you guys are having a rooftop conversation, to bring up queer people you know. Celebrities, mutual friends, etc. Ask her how she feels about those people. If she's cool with it, that's a good signal that you can come out.

Also think about- if you've told her other secrets, has she told other people? If not, then you can trust her with something like this.

As far as your cousin's sexuality- I'm not sure if you're reading into it. But remember, even if you come out to her, she might not return the gesture even if she IS queer. She might not be ready, and that's okay! Just continue to be a safe space for her no matter who she likes.