#but it's not like... a health hazard!!!

[cypheragent]

landlords are so fucking evil because wdym some random dude might decide i deserve to end up homeless because my room isn't clean enough in his stupid opinion

[ew-selfish-art]

DpxDc AU: Justice League requires all of its youngest members to list at least one adult emergency contact in case something happens out in the field- And Lancer did tell Danny to put his number down if he needed help!

Lancer wanted to call CPS, wanted to call them for years, but something was wrong with his beloved town and the government agents that came were always… ill mannered. To say the least. So with the young Mr.Fenton appearing wounded in his class on multiple occasions, sleeping through lectures even more often, Lancer felt himself gradually accept that no other adult was going to step up to protect this child.

He figures out his Identity as Phantom and it makes his rage boil hotter than Dante’s sixth layer of hell. Danny refuses to abandon his parents (who continue to hunt him unknowingly), and he refuses to let any of his ghostly responsibilities fall wayside (this CW fellow is a real piece of work!).

But for all the things he expected when he told Danny that he could be trusted and could help- Ms. Manson and Mr.Foley coming to him for help, patching wounds, offering snacks and covering for Danny when attacks occurred in class- he hadn’t expected the Justice League to be knocking on his door.

Lancer blinked at the appearance of Batman in his classroom after the final bell, but then his stomach dropped.

TELLTALE HEART THATS THE BATMAN!!

“Phantom listed you as his emergency contact. Have you had any recent communication with him?” The deep, gravel voice startled Lancer.

Lancer checks his phone, Danny had skipped class today; and while Lancer was working with Danny to get him after school lessons and tutoring for all of the hours he missed, it was uncommon for him not to respond at Lancer’s text asking for a confirmation of his safety.

“Not in 24 hours, but I can message him again.” Lancer is shaking as he types on his phone to team phantom-Who wouldn’t be nervous at both the implications of Danny’s safety and the Batman??

Superman flies into the room from the open doorway, “No luck, without a heartbeat I can’t find him. Where ever they have him it’s lead lined or he’s keeping himself invisible.”

SCARLET LETTER ITS SUPERMAN!?!

Danny doesn’t reply to Lancer, and neither do Danny’s friends.

“He has two team members with whom he is inseparable, if none of them are responding then all three have been accosted. I’m coming with you until we find them.” Lancer declares and while he’s sure that Batman is unimpressed, Superman gives him a sad smile and nods.

Thus Lancer joins the Justice League for a day, Helps to save Team Phantom and Informs the takedown of an illegal government agency.

Batman also slides him some adoption papers and a card for a lawyer if Lancer decides to formally adopt Danny. Lancer also wins a Wayne Excellence Award for Teaching that year but he’s pretty sure the money is unrelated to Danny’s alter ego- after all, Lancer is a fantastic teacher.

[sforzesco]

"Since you've named yourself after Julius fucking Caesar, perhaps I'll follow in your lead and choose one of the conspirators." "Interesting," says Giuliano. "Should I worry about finding you at the center of some kind of conspiracy that ends with my death?" "Not from me," replies Ascanio. He sounds tired. "Not anymore."

informally, some kind of. conversational follow up to the last comic. I'm trying to get the atmospheric conversational whimsy out of my system because I have a vision of the vatican as a body in active decay, a point of infection spreading out and poisoning the well, a jaw unhinged that people walk into over and over, and I am so close to figure out how to convey this visually. maybe.

[columboscreens]

[kacievvbbbb]

Look I like Roger enough, I understand what he represents and I generally don’t think he was a bad dude. I do however think he was shit at interpersonal relationships because, what the fuck. Whitebeards crew is infinitely more well adjusted and I’d say he arguably had the more traumatic death.

Like what even, what kind of planning leads a 53 year old man to sire a child knowing he is dying of an incurable illness and is about to turn himself in to be excuted by the marines where he will cause so much chaos it is literally still turning the world on its head 22 years later. He knew he was going to cause so much of a stir that he literally disbanded his crew and told them to spread far and wide to keep them safe. Because he knew the marines would hunt them far and wide But yet he still brought a baby into the world. Babe. What the fuck? What even is that? What was the thought process. I sincerely hope it was an accident and not a deliberate attempt to bring about a new era.

Because if so babe I need to see the recipe or I’m afraid we can never let you cook again

[marc--chilton]

thinking about the fucking....... the cheek caress. lawrence dragged himself across that entire room, listening and watching and bleeding out while adam beat zep TO DEATH in spite of a gunshot wound that would have hurt like hell had it not been for the obscene amount of adrenaline in his system. how he kept going and going AND GOING even after the lid shattered and only stopped because lawrence with his limited time expended the effort to finally close the gap between them. and how even though mere seconds prior adam was all but frothing at the mouth, now, with him clutching him, sobbing, blood on both of their hands, lawrence handles him gently. he doesn't have the time to hold adam through his tremors but he offers him a kind touch anyway. he doesn't even think about it, his thumb shakily over that high cheekbone, smearing blood and adoration into his skin.

[apollos-boyfriend]

hannibal is that meme of books where the big stack is normal hannibal and the small one is hannibal if jack actually cared about will's mental state

not only that but?? proper laws and proceedings?? there’s no way what they did with freddie was legal. and probably could’ve circumvented a bunch of bullshit. abigail’s the daughter of a high-profile serial killer whose victims haven’t been found nor was he able to given proper sentencing and retribution. why was her hospital room not guarded or at least monitored. there’s still BLOOD and EVIDENCE in her UNMONITORED HOUSE. like i’m not an expert on any of this but it’s just common sense i fear 😭

[parker-rose]

rosekiller is actually so excellent because both barty and evan are the kind of people to mask their problems with humour and it makes for such a fun dynamic

i could argue wolfstar has this too but the angst potential of both jegulus and wolfstar is so much higher than rosekiller like their trajectory would be angst to a happy ending or consistent angst but rosekillers trajectory would be happiness to the worst ending ever possible ever

[officialgleamstar]

Oh my god I’m so close to done with cleaning my room now. Jesus Christ. My room hasn’t looked like this since 2008

[ostensiblyfunctional]

The range of Erik's potential diet is once again fascinating me, on the basis of the sheer number of things that can highly inconvenience/kill a human. Obviously there's the chemical/plant/animal poisons that first come to mind—y'know, arsenic, belladonna, the unpleasantness that happens if you try to eat a monarch butterfly, that sort of thing. And I do have fun wondering if Erik's the type of guy to just … snatch some poor, poisonously bright insect off the side of a trunk and pop it in his mouth, as is his due as a Dragon Slayer who are just kinda like that sometimes.

However. The thought of Erik carefully harvesting and making his own wild licorice and monkshood tisanes, making use of a well-loved copper teapot and his treasured, antique tea service painted with lead-based glaze … kicking back with a cordial of pure ethanol, and the cordial is of course made of lead crystal … Meredy wandering over to an unsupervised, brightly-colored cookpot because whatever's in there smells amazing, then suddenly Erik is tackling her away and shouting about the cyanide he just spiced his quail and grass pea soup with, did Oración Seis not tell her to not touch his cadmium-painted cookpots?! Just, Erik being fancy about his poison consumption, because humans sure have figured out a bunch of ways to really inconvenience themselves and he might as well take advantage of their mistakes.

Also, what counts as poisonous enough to use? Humans can intoxicate themselves on too much water. Can Erik use that? There are so many things that are nonlethally, and even unnoticeably, harmful to us, so how trace can a poison be before Erik can't convert it into magic? Carbon monoxide is a notoriously odorless, colorless gas that is very bad for us—can Erik convert a poison he can't perceive? Can he straight-up eat rotten food because it would otherwise be harmful for literally anything else to eat? Relatedly, does this mean he really likes fermented food, because that's essentially rotten food that humans like to eat? I have questions

[llycaons]

the shower pee tags are extremely divisive btw

[caterjunes]

what is it about lesbian media that fills me with the heaviest & most profound sadness in the pit of my stomach, in my throat, under my heart.

[columboscreens]

columbo - caution: murder can be hazardous to your health

[amoebacore]

sorry to be only posting bad news it feels on here :( i have truly been in survival mode for more than a year now and im just exhausted

my Dad doesnt believe in asking others for help so he tries to solve everything by himself but no money and me who has 0 money and no prospects its just not feasible

im looking into PA laws about home sellers and my father is a lawyer so we may be able to take the previous owner to court for not disclosing but im not 100% sure yet

[hotdrinks]

not an exaggeration, once a month, right when rent is due, my apartment complex sends me a notice that is like “uhhmmm teehee..you actually owe us 1,000 additional dollars. don’t ask why :33″ and then I send them a detailed email including screenshots and time stamps of why that is not the case and they go “drats!! he got us!!!” and scamper back to their little hole underneath the roots of a big tree like “we’ll get him next month!” like if they can just catch me unawares I’ll accidentally pay them $1000

[knightdykes]

flops over... I love the neighbor's cat but we've essentially been taking care of her for nearly a month straight at this point. for pretty much no compensation. I'm super fucking allergic to her and have to wear a kn94 to be able to like. breathe afterwards, and I'm over there for half an hour at least twice a day