hale-shane-blog

[nnoragamis]

potentially controversial opinion but i think lucy is actually in the same boat as natsu when it comes to opening up to others/communicating. i think it's just easier to miss because most of the story is told from her POV and so the audience is pretty in-tune with what she's going through...but that doesn't necessarily mean that the characters around her are.

lucy's pretty tight-lipped about her past, which makes sense for when she was actively keeping it a secret—but even after everything comes out into the open, i don't think she's ever completely forthcoming about what her life was actually like before she joined fairy tail. her friends don't even know that her mother is dead until much later! even after the entire incident with phantom lord, she doesn't tell anyone what she's planning when she leaves to confront her dad—she leaves a note, sure; but it's so vague that it's no surprise that the rest of the team misinterpreted it to mean that she was leaving for good.

later on, when lucy feels like she's being stalked, she had no problem venting about it to natsu and happy—until her "stalker" turns out to be her dad and they have a bitter exchange. even though natsu, happy and gray show up almost immediately to check on her, she clams up about what happened. she doesn't say anything the next day at the guild, either, and when she realizes her dad might be in danger, she up and leaves without a word, despite the fact that her team is right there, and she doesn't know what kind of danger she might be throwing herself into.

and i already made a post about this, but the fact that lucy apologizes to natsu and happy for "inconveniencing" them when she found out that her dad died is fucking bonkers and really is indicative of her deep-rooted issues in this area.

finally, i think the entire plotline with aquarius is the biggest example of this. idk what's happened in the 100 yq manga (and i don't care), but as far as the main series is concerned, lucy keeps everything that happened during the tartaros battle to herself. she casually mentions it in front of gray and happy, i think, but that was probably just a fuck-up on mashima's part, because as far as the rest of canon went, she kept that shit close to her chest. she clearly associates natsu leaving with the pain of losing aquarius, and resents him for it on some small level, but again, aside from a few vague barbs here and there, she never actually comes out and says what she's feeling about it.

idk, i just think it's an interesting aspect of her character that goes overlooked.

[d4minnie]

Hello sweetie... can I request a Sukuna x female reader story where the reader is Megumi's gf....so Megumi, reader and Yuji were in a club....they sneak to go to the club because in jujutsu high it's not allowed to go to clubs. They went one night for fun without telling anyone. So in the party everything was going well. Reader was safe because she was with Megumi. But after a time Megumi got a call from Gojo. He went outside to receive that. In that moment Sukuna took over Yuji and took reader to the bathroom and Noncons.... Megumi tried to save but couldn't because the door was locked.....Sukuna did it to make Yuji regret.... because after that yuji will think that it's all his fault.... especially because it's his body which Nonconed his own bestfriend's gf

Pairing: Sukuna x Afab!Reader

Warnings: Angst, Non con and cheating?? idk if its cheating

wc:1,757

I feel like this is lowk shit

MINORS DNI

The bass thumped through the club, neon lights flickered, casting colourful shadows over the dancing bodies, and laughter echoed in the air. It was a night of freedom for you, Megumi, and Yuji—a night away from the responsibilities of Jujutsu High, a night to feel normal.

You felt safe nestled against Megumi, his arm draped protectively around your shoulders. Yuji was nearby, a whirlwind of energy as he danced with abandon. You couldn’t help but smile; seeing your boyfriend relaxed and enjoying himself was a rare treat.

“Let’s grab some drinks!” Yuji shouted over the music, his enthusiasm infectious. You nodded, and Megumi reluctantly let go of you as you all made your way to the bar.

After a few drinks and lots of laughter, the three of you were lost in the moment, the worries of the outside world melting away.

Megumi’s phone then buzzed in his pocket.

“It’s Gojo,” he said, frowning. “I’ll be right back.”

You watched him slip outside, the door swinging shut behind him. For a moment, you felt a pang of unease. You trusted Megumi, but there was always a lingering tension that came with being involved in the jujutsu world. Yuji seemed to pick up on it, too.

“Hey, let’s keep the fun going!” he said, flashing you a wide grin. You tried to shake off your worry, joining him on the dance floor once again.

But just as you were beginning to lose yourself in the rhythm, an unsettling energy filled the room. The air grew heavier, and you noticed a shift in Yuji’s demeanor. His smile faded, replaced by a vacant look in his eyes.

“Yuji?” you called out, concern lacing your voice.

Then it happened. Yuji’s body shuddered violently, and in an instant, a dark aura enveloped him. You instinctively took a step back, your heart racing as a sinister grin spread across Yuji’s face—Sukuna had taken over.

“Looks like it’s time for some real fun,” came Sukuna’s voice, a dark, mocking tone that sent chills down your spine. He lunged forward, seizing your wrist with a grip like iron.

“No!” you screamed, trying to wrench free, but he was impossibly strong. “Let me go!”

He dragged you through the crowd, the chaos of the club fading as you were pulled into the dimly lit bathroom. Sukuna slammed the door shut, locking it with a click that echoed ominously.

“You’re going to be very entertaining,” he purred, stepping closer, his eyes glinting with sadistic delight. “You think you can hide behind that weakling? I’ll show you real power.”

“Get away from me!” you shouted, forcing yourself to stand your ground. “You’re nothing without Yuji!”

Sukuna chuckled darkly, a low, rumbling sound that vibrated through you. “Oh, little girl, how wrong you are. I am the true power here. And I will take what I want.”

He stepped closer, invading your space then picks you up making you shriek and him smirk, he loved how you looked up at him with so much fear.

He travels his lips down your neck, making you moan when he found your sweet spot, “Fucking slut” he snarled.

He sucks a big red mark on your special spot, not wasting anytime he not giving you time to adjust before thrusting inside.

You cried out in pain, but he didn't care.

You felt so full, so violated, and yet your body responded, your walls clenching around him. His hips started moving with a steady rhythm that seemed to resonate through the very core of your being.

Your mind reeled as he claimed you, his hands gripping your hips tightly as he drove into you, his pink hair a blur as your eyes brimmed with tears.

The pain and the pleasure melded together into something new, something that made the knot in your stomach grow with every brutal thrust.

His hands gripped your hips tightly, guiding your movements as his long girthy member drove into you, the feeling of his thickness filling you up unlike anything you had ever experienced. You were lost in the haze of pleasure he groaned as his teeth dug into your neck.

You felt the pressure building within you, each stroke pushing you closer and closer to the edge. Each thrust was like a lightning bolt, sending waves of pleasure through your body. Everything was a blur, but you could make out one thing, his vermillion eyes never leaving yours.

He thrived in the power he had over you, the way you moaned and whimpered for him whilst trying to convince yourself you disliked what was going on. But your tight cunt clenching around him said otherwise.

His grip on your hips tightened, his pace quickening as he reached around to tweak your nipples, rolling them between his thumb and forefinger until you were panting and whimpering. "That's it," he groaned, his voice thick with lust. "Take it all."

You dug your nails into his back as he continued bruising your cervix. You let out a choked plea for him to stop but the only reply you got was a mocking chuckle.

The sound of skin slapping against skin filled the air, a harsh counterpoint to the soft whispers of your breaths. Your thoughts were a jumbled mess, a tornado of confusion and fear, yet your body was betraying you, arching back into his touch, begging for more.

He was relentless, driving you closer and closer to the edge. You could feel warmth building up inside you, before it left.

What?

"Filthy whores like you don't deserve to cum" He spat before switching back into Yuji.

You watched Yuji blink rapidly, disoriented and confused.

“(Y/N)!” he gasped, panic flooding his voice. But as his eyes landed on you, huddled against the wall, he froze. The look in your eyes was filled with fear and something else—something that pierced through his confusion like a dagger.

The memories came flooding back, and he staggered to his feet, guilt crashing over him like a wave. “I… I didn’t mean to—” he started, his voice trembling.

But you didn’t respond. You were staring at him, wide-eyed and trembling, your expression hardening. A deep pit of dread opened in Yuji’s stomach as he took in your silence.

“(Y/N), I’m so sorry! I couldn’t control him!” he pleaded, stepping closer. But you recoiled, pressing yourself further against the wall as if his presence was a poison.

“Don’t,” you said sharply, your voice cold and unyielding. “Just… don’t come near me.”

His heart sank. “What do you mean? I didn’t want any of this!” He reached out again, desperate to bridge the gap, but you flinched at his touch.

“Didn’t want this?” you spat, anger mingling with your fear. “You let him take control! You didn’t even try to fight him!”

“I—” he stammered, but the words fell flat. The truth stung harder than any accusation. He had let Sukuna take over, and now he felt the weight of your words like a heavy shroud.

“Why should I trust you?” you continued, your voice rising. “You put me in danger! You let him hurt me!”

As you dashed out of the bathroom, your heart raced with a mix of fear and anger. You caught sight of a familiar figure slumped against the wall.

“Megumi?” you whispered, your breath hitching in your throat.

He looked up at you, his eyes puffy and red, filled with sorrow and helplessness. “(Y/N),” he said, his voice barely above a whisper.

In that moment, everything crashed down around you. The realization that he had been there the entire time, locked out and unable to intervene, cut deeper than you expected. “You… you were here?” you stammered, disbelief flooding your senses.

“I tried to get in. I heard everything. I couldn’t stop him—” he began, but you couldn’t let him finish.

“You didn’t do anything!” you shouted, your voice rising with raw emotion. “You were just sitting here while he—”

“I was locked out! I couldn’t break through!” Megumi interrupted, desperation creeping into his tone. “I swear I wanted to help you!”

“Wanted to help me?” you snapped, feeling betrayal claw at your throat. “You were supposed to protect me! You stood there while Sukuna took over, and I was terrified!”

“I know, and I’m so sorry—” he started, but you cut him off again, the weight of his words suffocating you.

“I can’t do this!” you cried, shaking your head as your heart raced. “I fucking hate you!” Without waiting for another response, you turned on your heel and bolted outside, pushing through the crowd of dancers.

“(Y/N), please! Don’t go!” Megumi called after you, but his voice faded into the noise, the pulsing music drowning out everything else.

[yanderefarm]

no i actually thought about it. Like

7 days a week right. So if each gets a day alone with you then that means you have 4 days left to rest/ be shared along the brothers. Im thinking of rest days every in between. And I'm thinking of a pretty dominant reader who can take good care of the illads and take control of the situation. Like if ares gets out of hand then reader would be the one to step up. I'm thinking reader's ultimate punishment would be his disappointment and his silence. I think he'd have all of them agree on something (discussed by all 4 ofc) and he'll stick to it.

Like if ares keeps forgetting about the brothers he'll try to remind ares about taking care of the brothers would make him really happy and he'll reward ares with a good time when it's his turn.

Ajax, he can continue working i think but i personally like the fact that ares gets so defensive about how he doesn't love you if he does (i agree ngl) so like ajax would probably try to keep it in his pants, or use toys instead, or opt for a hotel? Achilles... Oh my sweet baby. He's so stressed out and the most responsible and submissive one actually i like him a lot. Whenever it's his time you pamper him but then you get so rough with him to fuck all the stress away it's like it's worth it stressing himself worrying about you and his brothers as long as you're happy and that you wont leave him.

Reader would try to not show any favoritism (might be hard because the only sane one is like, achilles) but i think one of the rules reader would put up is "whoever behaves the best within the week gets an extra day" And to pick, he'll have to state facts (so no misunderstandings can happen)

damn u really do have it all planned out. 7 days tho that means technically they could each get 2 days with one day for rest.

also ajax is willing to change the type of content he makes for his darling!! he would ask you to make content with him and if that wasn't an option its solos and jois only.

ares would definitely get used to taking care of everyone with these rules. like he does love his brothers he's just salty. with routine and schedules i think he could get into the swing of his usual housewife self, cooking, cleaning, etc.

you would have to make sure that you were able to attend to one of his drops though. like! he gets really insecure about himself and about your love for him and he needs reassurance or he'll very quickly spiral out of control. so you would have to sometimes drop whatever you're doing even with someone else to give him his reassurance to keep him from going off the deep end.

i can't see the other two minding this? like ajax is most likely to comment but he's not gonna actually complain. them being brothers comes in handy here because they do really care about each other and they know what the others need to be ok.

well except when it comes to achilles. i think you would kind of have to tell the other two about your night job at some point. and i think this is the one time in his life ares is not jealous of someone getting extra time with you. he's just like "oh ok. sure. please try not to make too much noise and be back by dinner time."

ares is the only one who is not a masochist.

ajax would be kind of curious and wanna see your stuff but like idk how curious he would get.

in this dynamic i also see achilles being the main breadwinner in the house, you don't have to work anymore if you don't want to. you just gotta greet your wives with kisses whenever one of them gets home.

[baxndaid]

rick sanchez x reader

headcannons or something idk i like old men read my stanford x readers here too x <- POLL AT THE END !!

- you’re probably a family friend, you come over every once in a while to supervise morty and summer while jerry and beth try to rekindle their failing marriage

- you do a horrible job because the kids always end up sneaking out with their grandpa to kill some god or something absurd like that

- your oblivious, rick isn’t necessarily cold towards you, just indifferent

- he would rather be elsewhere than in the living room talking to some random person that beth insists on having in her house

- one day you catch them sneaking out and probably hide inside of the trunk of ricks car(?) because curiosity killed the cat or something like that

- the cars system would probably inform him that he has an unexpected visitor and your caught red handed, now inside the passenger seat with morty and his grandfather

- awkward would not be enough to describe what that whole journey was

- rick would berate you for being so stupid, telling you that you had no survival skills getting into strangers cars like that

- morty sat in silence, disappointed that he couldn’t go to “boob world” or whatever he called it

- you see, you’re a professional glazer

- it’s not even unintentional like you’re genuinely super impressed by this guy what the fuck do you mean he’s fucked a planet?? crazy work me next

- he decides to keep you around to stroke his ego, it’s refreshing to have someone who’s not always busting his balls about morality and space laws

- and having someone as attractive as you worship him like a god sounded good to him

- after a while he’ll definitely enjoy your company but pretend he’s super cool and suave , pretending that he’s not excited to spend some time with you

- morty gets a little concerned at the fact that his grandpa has taken a liking to you, with with beth

- they know what he’s like, he’s brash and cold one minute, and a little normal the next

- they eventually give in though, they’ve never seen him so calm before, maybe you’ll change him and his chaotic ways

- (you can’t and you won’t)

- he’s super distant when he realises he might have genuine feelings for you, it’s not like him at all to feel all mushy

- truth is, he’s lonely, he’s sad, he’s afraid that things won’t work out, something bad happens to you etc, then he’s back to being lonely

- yeah he’ll probably be a little mean to you at first, to try and scare you off

- doesn’t work, so he gives up with the sass

- definitely builds you little trinkets and machines now and then

- you have no time to mow the lawn? he’s going to build self mowing grass for you (it’s a little sad)

- always stuck in traffic? he’s tinkered with your car and now whenever you drive by a traffic light it’ll always be green (so many casualties)

- too cold today? he’s going to discreetly push the sun a little closer to the earth, juuust a smidge

- he definitely butt dials you when he’s drunk only to cry on your lap until he sobers up and then pretends nothing happened, if he tells you anything particularly sensitive then your memories about it are going bye-bye

- it would take a lot for him to confess, for real

- normally though you’ll probably find a bunch of voice mails from him, he sounds rough and panicky, like he’s about to die in some stupid mission (you could always near morty crying in the background)

- he’ll tell you that he loves you, and that you make him forget about how much he hates himself

- forget about that though because in the very next voice mail he sounds normal again and is telling you to ignore what the last message said

- do not ignore it pls

- do something subtle but nice, like bake or cook him something, or buy him a new lab coat, anything

- he’ll probably get the hint soon

[slothpower-central]

Here's my super early before everything Canto 8 bingo card

You all asked for it so I shall hand it over, keep in mind this is subject to change massively based on things like the intermissions, I want to be the first person to make a Bingo card for way in the future, call it a....long term investment Here is my super early Canto 8 Bingo card!!

Okay so I kinda wanna explain the board choices for funsies!

Hong Lu is a rock-.....obviously the big theory is on here!

Mothershu crumbs-So my friends and I refer to like character moments and hints as crumbs and mothershu is what we refer to as Ryoshu being a mother or like alluding to that(like with smth like Spider Bud)

Sinclair snaps-We get another moment similar to his shut the fuck up moment in Canto 7

Freak Lu- uhm this one is more of a silly one since with the number of times that man is tied up or smth and is chill with it (What do you mean it was a unique and fun experience?!?!) my friends and I think he's into it, so we included it for fun

No romance plotline-sigh. Wishful thinking on the part of a Hong Lu yume shipper(me) one of the original novels main plotlines is a whole romance love triangle thing goin on with Baoyu. My friend an I were going back and forth on if/how they could adapt that madness so to subvert expectations,we said no romance

We go to the Land of Illusion-Look if Baoyu goes there in the original, who's to say we won't go in Limbus

Outis Family crumbs- Outis saying anything about her family or home or Penelope or any of that

Uhm the Lin Daiyu space is self-explanatory aside from the descriptors, it's more in reference to my friend's bingo card she made for Canto 7, and it had "Dulcinea is a baddie" on there so I had to carry on the joke

That Grey Bastard appears-uhm.... that's in reference to Demian. My friend group is not a fan of him (I'm literally close friends with the real reincarnation of Emil Sinclair, of course we have conflicting feelings on Demian)

Levels copy the style of chapter names- So the names of levels last canto matched up with the way chapters in Don Quixote are titled and it was the same way in Canto 5 so Amia and I thought it might carry over to Canto 8 ^^

Heathcliff crumbs-We kinda threw his one in here but y'know more Heathcliff family moments or more Heathcath

Baoyu name reveal-Okay before you say, "But Sloth, they did reveal it to the sinners!" uhm no, look at who was in that convo. It was Wei, Xichun and Hong Lu, the other sinners do not know, or they just really decided to not comment on that

Chapter with the most npcs-This one is a prediction because guys. The original novel has like 400 characters in it.

Story Dungeon in Canto-So I always like to ask whether we'll get one since in Canto 6,we didn't get a dungeon,so we put it on there

Hong Lu is a "Charon situation"- I proposed some kind of crazy idea that Hong Lu was like overwriting Baoyu's personality/old self or smth and Amia responds with "Charon situation" since in Leviathan Lapis gets herself overwritten by one of her mirror worlds, that being Charon. So maybe something of a similar nature happened to Hong Lu (Yes this is different enough from rock theory to me)

Hong Lu doesn't distort- Ha you thought! Amia and I are like *convinced* the Hell's Chicken line is a red herring meant to throw us off. Like Quixote distortion was a big theory for a while and she didn't distort (Can bloodfiends distort? Idk) I know we're in the minority but like unless something changes my mind, I'm gonna keep being in the minority

[front-facing-pokemon]

[inkskinned]

it is all chaos and entropy. the thing is that the chaos and entropy make it beautiful and lovely.

yes, it's true that nature and the universe are uncaring and unspecific, and that is terrifying. i have lived through some of the unfairness - i got born like this, with my body caving into itself, with this ironic love of dance when i sometimes can't stand up for longer than 15 minutes. i am a poet with hands that are slowly shutting down - i can't hold a pen some days. recently i found a dead bird on our front porch. she had no visible injuries. she had just died, the way things die sometimes.

it is also true that nature and the universe are uncaring and unspecific, and that is wonderful. the sheer happenstance that makes rain turn into a rainbow. the impossible coincidence of finding your best friend. i have made so many mistakes and i have let myself down and i have harmed other people by accident. nature moves anyway. on the worst day of my life she delivers me an orange juice sunset, as if she is saying try again tomorrow.

how vast and unknowing the universe! how small we are! isn't that lovely. the universe has given us flowers and harp strings and the shape of clouds. how massive our lives are in comparison to a grasshopper. the world so bright, still undiscovered. even after 30 years of being on this earth, i learned about a new type of animal today: the dhole.

chance echoing in my life like a harmony between two people talking. do you think you and i, living in different worlds but connected through the internet - do you think we've ever seen the same butterfly? they migrate thousands of miles. it's possible, right?

how beautiful the ways we fill the vastness of space. i love that when large amounts of people are applauding in a room, they all start clapping at the same time. i love that the ocean reminds us of our mother's heartbeat. i love that out of all the colors, chlorophyll chose green. i love the coincidences. i love the places where science says i don't know, but it just happens.

"the universe doesn't care about you!" oh, i know. that's okay. i care about the universe. i will put my big stupid heart out into it and watch the universe feast on it. it is not painful. it is strange - the more love you pour into the unfeeling world, the more it feels the world loves you in return. i know it's confirmation bias. i think i'm okay if my proof of kindness is just my own body and my own spirit.

i buried the bird from our porch deep in the woods. that same day, an old friend reaches out to me and says i miss you. wherever you go, no matter how bad it gets - you try to do good.

[isthatacalzone]

me: *seeing people yell about how they did Glintshore & Percy's death in the show*

also me: ..................anyway

[autisticaradiamegido]

day 169

this is it, the dynamic

[pleasedontcareaboutme]

It's missing my father hours rn so imma just dump a bunch of pictures here and cry

( sorry i don't know the source of anything I just had them on my phone)

(also dont read the tags i just need to let it out lol)

[trashlie]

ILY FP 258

I can't believe we're actually passed episode 250 lmao I Love Yoo is truly the never ending story (affectionate). I appreciate how much of the story we really get to dig into at this pace and while I know a lot of people have long-since dropped it, I imagine the rest of us (those reading this post because why else are you here?) also appreciate it. And that's what is even more refreshing about this episode - if refreshing is even a word we can use to describe it. Getting the extra scenes from other characters, a look at their lives and from these glimpses, what we can glean in the unsaid between the lines.

Can you believe I used to prey on Kousuke's downfall? There's so many posts of me talking about him from a different view, believing that the only way he could grow and develop and make the changes necessary to make him a better person was for him to crash and burn, to fail so significantly that he would be forced to pen his eyes to reality. But here we are, me, fervently swaddling him up like a baby and shoving him into my pocket because GOD he needs to be protected.

I don't even remember when it was, that my view on him began to shift, when I went from "he's interesting but awful" to "GOD THIS IS MY SON AND I WILL FIGHT EVERYONE YOU HAVE TO GO THROUGH ME" but.... lol there's no going back!

That's enough rambling, let's jump in.

There is something so painfully devastating about every time ILY confirms to us something we have long-since known or suspected through nuance, foreshadowing, reading between the lines, etc: That Kousuke isn't Rand's biological son, that Shinae was at the formal for Gun Kim, that Kousuke has been manipulated his whole life. Nothing in this episode regarding Kousuke is actually new to us. We have known, and talked about, for months and months long before the confirmation reveal that Yui drugs Kousuke - that he has been manipulated by her his entire life, that she orchestrated his life to manipulate him into situations she could take advantage of. It's the way she spoke about Rand's affair around Kousuke, the way she commodified Rand's love so Kousuke became convinced he'd never earned his father's love, the way she spoke of their family vs others and convinced him from such a young age that everyone was out to get them, to destroy them, and that he couldn't let them get close, couldn't let them near - and how Nol was very much a target planted in his mind.

But it's the fact that he is speaking of this and acknowledging it! Until now, Kousuke has heavily lived in denial. Again, we know this. We talk a lot about the chasm between reality and the reality he believes in. We talk a lot about how Kousuke couldn't face reality, even though on some level he knew everything he believed and was told was not quite true not quite real, but that he was so afraid of the truth, he couldn't do it. Kousuke admitting that he's been driven by fear and envy explains everything about him, and why he could not accept the only unwavering unconditional love he was offered.

A few weeks ago I saw a video on instagram of this father talking about a conversation he had with his daughter, who was feeling a little uncomfortable with her friend group. A new girl started to play with her and her best friend and she said she wasn't exactly jealous, but that maybe it was that she was afraid that there wasn't enough love to go around. Her dad had to explain to her that love is not like a pizza - it's not finite, a limited amount that could be taken and hogged by someone else. But Kousuke never learned this. His father's love was commodified and he was made to fear this other kid who he mistakenly believed knew a version of his father he'd never been privy to. He never learned that love is finite, that Rand could have enough love for the both of them, and feared that Nol would hog it all - that he WAS hogging it all because whether or not it was good or bad, Nol received more attention that Kousuke did. And that speaks VOLUMES about how Kousuke sees Rand, what he thinks of their relationship. In his mind, he is still unworthy, that he's not noteworthy enough.

This part gets to me so badly. We, as omniscient readers, know that Rand has tried his best, but that Yui runs a spectacular interference with which he can't compete, largely because of the roles their family have placed them in - Rand the busy businessman, Yui the mommy homemaker. But no matter how hard he tries, it isn't good enough. Rand tries to reach Kousuke, but the manipulation and paranoia are so far gone that the times Rand does have the chance to convey his feelings, Kousuke can't even believe it, because he thinks he's not good enough to deserve that love, that he hasn't fully qualified for it yet. And despite that, Nol, who Kousuke feels hasn't done half of what he has to deserve Rand's love, gets the attention. It doesn't matter that it's negative attention, that Rand barks at Nol, that Nol feels Rand hates and regrets him, because ultimately, it's still more than Kousuke receives. And worse, to him, every time Rand is busy reprimanding Nol, he turns away from Kousuke to do it.

I want to make it clear that this is a deep trauma point of Kousuke's. He's never learned healthy love and the only person who gave him healthy love was someone he was set to fear and fight. Something I think about a lot is the flashback to Kousuke, in the bushes, watching Nessa and Nol's display of warm affection, before Yui appears literally looming before him. In that moment, he witnesses something he's been deprived of. "We're not like other families"'. He's told from a young age he shouldn't compare himself to those healthy families, to warm and affectionate relationships that he will not cultivate in this household. From such a young age it is normalized, that they aren't like others, that they are cold and distant. From a young age, he's made to stuff down his feelings, his tender wants and desires, in order to earn them. To be a good little boy who makes his parents proud. To make his father look his way.

There's also something about the way he says "I've been a good boy" that echoes Shinae learning she's been manipulated by Yui, devastated and angry and yelling about how she's been a good girl so why do these things keep happening to her, all she wanted to do was help her dad. Two people who, from a young age, felt they had to be so obedient, so good, to not be a burden, and despite following the rules, despite doing as they were told, despite trying to be whatever version of "good" they believed in, the world still beat them up and mistreated them. The world still punished them.

As Rin in our discord server pointed out, though, to some degree, Kousuke is very much a person who can - and does - act out, when he's emotionally high-strung. He's a volatile man, and it's largely to do with the fact that he's been drugged to placate him for so long. He never learned emotional regulation, he never learned how to deal with high-stress situations or to face conflict or to own up to things. This is something that some readers who hate Kousuke and expect him to act a certain way because of his age are missing. You don't just learn these things with age. You learn them with experience and Kousuke was deprived of the opportunity TO have those experiences. He never had to learn these behaviors, and now as an adult he cannot function when overwhelmed.

Idk this whole episode is just heartbreaking. It's devastating. I remember when I was someone praying on Kousuke's downfall and now I want to take it all back ;___; I always believed he had to crash and burn to be able to see the world for what it really was and to face his fears, but this is somehow so much worse.

And even though he's drunk, I don't think he's going to forget all of this in the morning. Rather, I think what he's voicing are things that have been plaguing him since waking up in the hospital. From that moment, we saw him wary and distrustful of his mother, we saw his concern for Nol rising above everything else, but grappling with the understanding that he doesn't deserve to stand in front of Nol anymore. These aren't epiphanies coming to him just because he's drunk; it's more like he's only voicing them because he's drunk. But even when he sobers up, he will probably still be haunted by these fears, these agonies, these truths, this understanding.

How does he face his mother after this? How does he face anyone? He may not even feel like he can trust Jayce - who while very kind to him, is still employed by his family. He may not even feel like he can trust Hansuke (though I really hope that's not the case).

He's so miserable and it genuinely hurts to have him lay it all out for us - everything we've known and suspected, like how it was so painfully clear he WANTED Nol's friendship, their brotherhood, but feared it, didn't believe that there was enough love to go around, that there could only be one of them and that even if it was for good or bad reasons, Nol cast him in the shadow. And all these years, watching as Nol, as Yeonggi, grew into this person who sounded so very much like this unknown version of their father, someone funny who makes others laugh, someone goofy, someone so boyish in the ways Kousuke was never allowed to be. Watching as he gathers friends, while Kousuke, so unlikeable, is wanted only for his money, for his status, for the clout.

He doesn't even know WHO HE IS! Questioning his own traits he's believed of himself, wondering if this is even him, if these parts of him are real or does he just act it, say it, pretend it, while trying to fulfill a role he was shoved into. That makes me feel SO deeply sad, because it's something I've been anticipating for so long: Kousuke wondering WHO he really is, how much of him is real and how much of it is the result of manipulation.

And that moment that he catches himself and says no no that's offensive and rude you can't be like that. ;AAA;

For him to admit how much he envies others, how much he craves the kind of connection others have, the kind of family others have, to feel that love and warmth that he's been deprived of, forced to endure this solitude because, as he believes, he didn't get the good parts of Rand. And what will happen when he learns that Rand isn't his father? That he never stood a chance to inherit any of those traits. Kousuke has operated on this belief that, if he tries hard enough, he can earn the things he craves, but I fear learning about his parenthood will make him think that no matter how hard he tried, he would never earn that, because none of it was ever him, could have gone to him.

I think this is where Shinae, in the future, will come in. I feel so very strongly that she will be someone who helps Kousuke to see that this isn't true, that these kinds of personality traits aren't something inherited, but rather something learned. For him to one day realize it's the paralyzing fear that holds him back, not his genetics. Of course, I acknowledge this will still take a lot of therapy but...

Something else very remarkable to me is the way Kousuke recognizes Shinae in Shinhye, because their eyes "feel the same" and he opens up to her - on some level, whether or not he is consciously aware of it, Kousuke knows, or maybe just wants to, that he can trust Shinae. That she is someone who is safe. He even knows how she feels about his mother. I don't think we'll see a lot of Kousuke and Shinae's friendship until we're passed our timeskips, but it makes me feel a little hopeful about it, that she'll be able to reach him, because she feels like someone who is safe. It's the way he sees Nol in her and wants to try to have that do over, a relationship with someone who  has unconditional love for him. It's the way he knows he mistreated Nol, that it was wrong, that he took it all out on this kid he was so afraid of because he had no other outlet, and he wants to do better but knows that there's nothing to salvage anymore.

But also, it just makes me hope more and more that in the future we WILL see a reconciliation between the brothers. As I say every time, it doesn't mean they have to become brothers or friends, but I just want them to see each other fully. Kousuke knows what he did to Nol. He doesn't deny it, even if he might not say it out loud unless he's drunk. But Nol is still so in the dark. Yujing is trying to tip him off and make him aware of it, but I hope one day when Nol realizes it, when he finds out that Kousuke, too, was Yui's victim, that he wasn't the only one, that Kousuke was made to fear Nol's love, he might.... understand. I'm saying understand here loosely because I don't want people to get the idea that I mean Nol will forgive him and Kousuke will be justified, but rather that Nol would be able to understand why Kousuke felt that way, and move on. But I can't help but hope that it will lead to an understanding, a reconciliation, where maybe they can try to be in each other's lives.

I think it's also interesting that Shinhye was somewhat honest, even if she wasn't very forthcoming, with Kousuke about her own family. It sounds like her mother has been gone for a long time, that she's been on her own the whole while, and I think it reinforces the idea that she believes both that Simhan is her father and that he rejected her, that he didn't want anything to do with her. It lines up, too, with how she feels that he wouldn't react well if he saw her (although I think she credited that to looking like their mother). In the same way that Shinae has felt abandoned and cast aside by their mother, Shinhye probably thinks their father never tried reach out, to find them, to maintain a relationship with her. Or perhaps it's that her mother fed her lies about him, made her believe him a different type of man, made her believe there would never be anything of their relationship to salvage. And given that she's the one who Kousuke opened to, it makes me think that there must be some kind of parallel there; the way she mentioned her own mother feels like maybe her mother, too, was a manipulative - or at the very least, dishonest - person.

I don't speculate a lot on Shinhye because frankly I don't think I know enough about her to really try to talk about her, but I do think that it's very likely there's some kind of connection between Shinhye and the Hirahras or Gun. To be clear, I don't believe she's working with Yui at all. I think it's more like... Alyssa isn't the only girl who has been trafficked by Gun. What's the likelihood that Shinae and Shinhye's mother was? Given her history, the gambling addiction that was so egregious her reputation haunted Shinae and chased her to a new neighborhood and school, was she seeking money somewhere else, somewhere more dangerous? Is that part of why they had to change their name? There's so many questions left about them, and I look forward to learning more about her, but, much like with Alyssa, I think it will take time and be dropped in little tidbits like this - things to read into and try to glean something from.

And maybe we'll see more of this duo in the future? It would feel a little weird to give them this one single run in, but I'm not entirely sure. Quimchee likes to keep us on our toes. After all, Minhyuk and Shinhye have also had only the one run in. Still, I think it would be interesting to watch, if Shinhye ever felt.... I want to say maybe compelled? to dig in more to Kousuke, ever feel a kind of kinship. I don't think she'll open up to him at all, but rather, maybe she'd keep going back because a. he's wealthy and there's more she can nick from him (assuming he doesn't realize she stole anything while in his apartment, if he even remembers any of this) and b. wanting to gather more intel.

Like I said though, she's hard to read so I don't want to cling too hard to any ideas and, instead, sit back and enjoy the show.

[oopsallmabari]

....why are the youtube comments so mad lol don't y'all like to have fun. don't we like to have fun here

[brutal-nemesis]

ok siiince you asked for requests for demon boy castys… the tongue cut out + gag seemed like such an adorable situation for him <33

Giving you that and a little extra because I wanted More Whump 💕

←Previous - Castys Masterlist

Ingredients: manhandling, a lot of unsexy noncon touching, slight dehumanization, partial nudity

Castys wasn’t sure if he slept at all that night, but after what felt like an eternity, Neteri reappeared wearing different clothes under her white coat.

“Good morning, Castys!” She sat on one of the stools from last night and motioned for him to do the same. “Get up, I’ve got wonderful news to share!” 

Castys opened his mouth to retort, but he found he couldn’t form the words. His tongue was still…he looked away, swallowing, and sat up while remaining on the floor. 

“You’re going to have to start listening to me, you know. Because,” she broke out into an excited smile, “I get to keep you!” Upon seeing Castys’s glare, she just laughed. “I figured you wouldn’t be excited, but trust me,” she held up a finger, “you’ll be much better off in my hands than if you were sold as a pet to some bored aristocrat. I’m sure they’d beat that personality right out of you, and I don’t plan on doing anything of the sort. As long as you cooperate with my experiments, you’re free to be yourself. You can even hate me as much as you like!” Castys raised an eyebrow at her final statement. He’d see about that.

After rummaging in her bag for a moment, she pulled out a little silver medal and moved to crouch next to him on the ground. “Hold still now,” she ordered as she started to bring it towards his neck. Castys wasn’t sure what was happening at first, but after a moment, it clicked, and he decided he’d rather not listen, leaning back. Neteri just sighed. “You’re not off to a very good start.” Well, it’s not like he wanted to be.

Suddenly, Neteri changed tactics, shoving him down on his back and straddling his waist before he could try to sit up, pinning his arms down with a knee on each elbow. Castys cried out, the wounds on his back from the whip lighting up in pain, and that combined with her full weight on him kept him from moving. He bared his teeth as her hand came closer, daring her to get within range, but she just curled her other hand in his hair, yanking it back and keeping his head firmly in place. Great. He was once again powerless against this tiny lady, forced to keep still as she attached that dumb little tag to the collar and sealed the metal shut with the same spell that kept him from taking it off.

“There,” she said once it was on. She tapped the tag, cold against his throat. “Property of Neteri Crozien. Whether you like it or not. Now,” she grabbed his chin, “are you going to let me put some new restraints on you or should I call the guards to manhandle you? Your resistance is pointless and only delaying the inevitable, exactly like every other time. Just nod if you’re going to cooperate.”

Did he want to get manhandled again? Not particularly. He’d had more than enough of being grabbed and held still while chains were taken off and put on. And it’s not like he was resisting out of pride or something stupid, he just fought back when it was something he really didn’t want to happen. Which was most things in the past couple days, but, hey, if new restraints meant he got to leave this boring-ass cell, he was okay with it. Her grip on his hair had loosened enough to allow him a small nod, so he gave one, praying she’d get the fuck off of him now.

Neteri smiled brightly at his cooperation. “Great! Although,” she got off of him and stood, thinking, “maybe just stay laying down. I don’t really trust you not to try and run at the moment, so just roll on your stomach and I’ll take the chains off.” Castys sighed in annoyance but complied, gritting his teeth as his weight went from his injured back to his burned chest. The cold stone floor felt a little good on it, at least, but it was a small consolation as he watched Neteri walk back over with a key and a coil of rope. 

She squatted down and-fuck, that was a knee on his back, not her full weight but enough to make him gasp in pain. Paying him no mind, Neteri unlocked the manacles around his wrists, and he could barely enjoy the feeling of not having anything around them for a moment, just wishing she’d tie him up and get the fuck off of his back. It didn’t feel like she was going particularly slow as she pulled his arms behind him and wound the rope around his wrists, but the seconds still dragged by at an agonizing pace. 

Finally, she finished tying the knot and took her knee off of his back as she stood. “There we go!” Castys just groaned, rolling on his side. “Oh, stop being so dramatic. It’s not like I was hurting you.” Castys’s glare deepened, and he awkwardly used his bound hands to pull up the back of his shirt enough to expose the bandages wrapped around his torso. Neteri’s jaw dropped slightly, and she just stared at him for a second before worry took over her features.

“I…I’m so sorry I…I completely forgot. That you were hurt. I wouldn’t have done that if I remembered.” Her head hung slightly. “I’m really sorry, Castys.” Her apology seemed genuine, but how the fuck did she forget he got whipped and branded yesterday? She looked back at him again. “Let’s just hurry and get you to your new home so I can heal you up, okay?” Wait, new home? She was taking him somewhere else? At first the idea was scary, but then Castys remembered that he’d never particularly loved living in the castle, so whatever. It was probably just going to be a different prison cell, anyway.

With ridiculous difficulty and a lot of groaning in pain, he managed to sit up, using his elbows to help him do it since his hands were kind of useless. By the time that was done, Neteri was standing above him with…a chain? He was already tied up what the fu-no. No fucking way. He growled as her hands moved towards his neck, baring his teeth once more.

“Seriously, Castys? You said you weren’t a dog yesterday, but you sure are acting like one.” Yeah, sure, whatever, but since he couldn’t fucking talk, he was forced to resort to other means of protest. He honestly wasn’t entirely sure where the growling came from himself, and, yeah, it was a little animalistic, but that didn’t mean he deserved to get put on a leash. “This is happening either way, so just give it up already.” Her hand was moving closer, closer, the clasp at the end of the chain open, ready to-

Once again, instinct took over, and before he knew it, his teeth were buried in the flesh of her hand.

Neteri cried out, jerking her hand back and dropping the leash. “Lyte! Seriously?!” She winced as she dabbed the wounds with what smelled like the stingy liquid from yesterday and used her magic to close them up, during which Castys couldn’t help but smile smugly. Once she was done healing, she pulled on her leather gloves and grabbed a couple rolls of bandages from her bag. “I figured you were going to be difficult to keep in line, but this is just ridiculous.” Castys took pride in being ridiculous, so he’d take the compliment. What he didn’t want to take were the consequences of his actions, but he was a little bit helpless at the moment, so there wasn’t much he could do as Neteri shoved a wad of bandages in his mouth and tied a strip around his head to keep him from spitting it out.

“There. You’re just about the only person who’d need to be gagged when they can’t talk.” Castys just looked away, feeling his face grow hot as she clipped the leash to the collar. She gave it a tug, but he didn’t budge. Now he was just resisting out of spite. Neteri’s expression grew even more frustrated, and it looked like she was about to say something before she stopped herself and took a deep breath, calming herself down. She crouched down to look Castys in the eye.

“Look, I’ve been going about this the wrong way. I hurt you when I didn’t mean to, so I’m not going to punish you for biting me. We’ll just call it even.” She paused and held up a finger. “The gag stays until we reach our destination, though. Just for safety’s sake. But I’ll tell you something about my plans for you. If you come with me, you’ll have a tongue again by the end of tomorrow. Does that sound good?” 

Castys could be stupid and stubborn and petty and shake his head and sit here and then end up getting dragged off to wherever, or he could just suck it the fuck up and get the ability to complain back. Complaining would be nice...After weighing his options he nodded, and Neteri broke into a smile. “Good. Let’s go, then.” She helped him stand, and she seemed to do her best not to pull on the leash as they walked along. Soon enough, they had reached the teleportation stone, and Castys…he couldn’t help but be a little excited to leave this stupid place. He knew he was a fucking prisoner now, but he was basically a prisoner in his old life, too, minus the chains and plus a comfy bed. 

At least he was going somewhere else.

The other palace was pretty cool, at least, the short glimpses he got before he was pulled into the lower levels, down halls and through doors until they arrived at his lame little prison cell. It did have a bed, though, so that was an upgrade. And a private bathroom?! Why did the prison cells in his family’s dungeon have to suck so much ass? He only spent two nights there, but still. If he was ever in charge of a dungeon, he would make sure it was at least a little comfy in case he got thrown in there.

Neteri clamped a manacle around his ankle, which was whatever, because that meant she untied his wrists and took that stupid leash off. And then, true to her word, she healed his wounds. The brand scarred, of course, which was…the symbol was kind of cool, but since it meant he was “property” or whatever he wasn’t too excited about it being on his chest for the rest of his life. At least shirts existed.

After that was done, Neteri instructed him to clean himself off and left him alone for a bit. He wandered into the bathroom, chain clinking with every step, and paused in front of the mirror. He looked pretty much the same as always, just a little more tired and blood-covered than usual. Oh, and the stupid collar around his neck. Neteri was fucking delusional, it didn’t look the slightest bit “cute” on him, it just looked…He didn’t want to see it anymore.

Once he was clean and dressed in some slightly comfier clothes, Castys tried out his new bed. It was nowhere near as nice as his old one, but it was way better than the floor, so he’d take it. Just as he was drifting off to sleep, Neteri poked him in the face.

“I’m back, Castys, get up and take your shirt off.” Castys sat up, but didn’t take his shirt off, instead just crossing his arms and raising an eyebrow. His wounds were healed, so what the hell did she need it off for? “Come on, I’m just going to examine you and take some measurements. Nothing painful, I promise.” Not painful, sure, but probably still not pleasant. Even so, he didn’t really have much choice but to listen, so he pulled off his shirt and stood, hoping this wouldn’t involve too much touching.

His hopes were in vain.

It started off fine, her measuring his height and a few other things with a strip of leather, but then she started running her hands all over him, poking at him, moving him this way and that. He couldn’t help but flinch every time since he hated being touched, and Neteri was clearly getting annoyed by it. His full-body recoil after she ran a hand down his spine was the final straw. Wordlessly, she clamped a manacle around one of his wrists before shoving him down onto the bed. He tried to stand back up, but she basically fucking tackled him, pinning him down on his back for the second time today. And, to top it all off, she managed to loop the chain around the top of the cot before cuffing his other wrist, leaving him pretty much helpless.

“I wouldn’t have to do this if you’d just kept still,” Neteri sighed, seeing his frustration. Well, it was a little fucking hard to be still when someone who’s basically a stranger is running their hands all over your bare skin. He considered trying to kick her, but she’d probably just chain him up more and keep going, and he’d rather this bullshit just be over with already.

Being chained down on his back somehow made this infinitely worse. There was nowhere to run, nothing he could do, Neteri looming over him as she put her hands all over him, touching his chest, his brand, squeezing his arms, grabbing his chin, pulling at his eyelids, gloves on now, hands in his mouth, poking at the stump of his tongue, feeling his teeth, gripping his hair to turn his head from side to side, his skin was crawling, crawling, his muscles tense, breaths coming short, fast, he just wanted her to get off stop touching him examining him taking notes reducing him down to just numbers just a body not a person not someone who got boundaries or personal space no just someone who gets touched and touched and touched-

“Castys! Hey, hey, just breathe.” Neteri was standing over him now, fiddling with the cuffs on his wrists, releasing him. Castys hadn’t even realized he was hyperventilating, but he tried his best to calm down as he scrambled to the other end of the bed, as far away from her as he could get. Neteri watched him sadly. “I…I was making you uncomfortable, wasn’t I? I’m sorry, I just thought you were trying to be a nuisance.” No shit he was fucking uncomfortable, how the hell did she misread that?! At least she looked upset by this, but it was way too late for that. Castys still felt like there were bugs crawling all over him, and he could feel his heart pounding out of his chest. 

Neteri reached out a hand in a misguided attempt to comfort him, but after seeing how Castys flinched and bared his teeth, she backed off. “Okay, okay, I’ll leave you alone. Well, I’ll go get you something to eat, and then I’ll leave you alone. Until tomorrow, and then you’ll have a tongue again and you can complain all you want and yell at me, okay?” Castys would rather never have to see her stupid face ever again, but that’s not how this was gonna work, so he just nodded silently, not relaxing until she’d left the room. 

He almost wanted to take a shower again, just to wash the feeling of her hands off, but it was starting to subside, so he just pulled his shirt back on and hid under the covers. What was that, exactly? He knew he didn’t like being touched, and he’d never let anyone do it remotely that much, so maybe being touched for so long in such an invasive way had been too overwhelming. Castys had thought he’d be a little tougher than this, since the thought of pain didn’t really scare him, but apparently being pinned down and touched was too much for him? Kind of…pathetic. Maybe it wouldn’t have been so bad if he could talk, protest, fight back a little bit with his words. Maybe he’d be okay once he could talk again.

He just hoped Neteri wasn’t lying about giving him his tongue back.

Castys Cult: @as-a-matter-of-whump​ @blackrosesandwhump @fanmanga1357-blog​​ @thehopelessopus​ @just-a-whumping-racoon-with-wifi

@hearse-song​ @muddy-swamp-bitch @whumpasaurus101 @yet-another-heathen​​ @galaxywhump​ 

@starnight-whump​ @his-unspoken-words​ @misspelledwitch​ @suspicious-whumping-egg​ @pumpkin-spice-whump 

@painsandconfusion @i-can-even-burn-salad​​ @befuddled-calico-whump​ @whumpinggrounds​ @whump-queen​

@whumpedydump

[slightlytoastedbagel]

see I have theories in regards to What The Fuck Is Wrong With Whit Young but they aren't the ones involving him being the mastermind or traitor. they're to do with whatever is going on with his mother

[triglycercule]

the mtt are lucky they don't have digestive systems and bladders because then they dont have to go through the absolute EMBARRASSMENT that is trying to pee in a damn cup for the doctors and not being able to pee not once. not twice. but also dropping the goddamn cup into the toilet. they are so,,,,,, SO lucky

[hauntingblue]

Jayce telling vi she won't make it on her own.... okay mr. projector...