#but it’s terribly sad out of context and that’s how I’m using it

[wkngsnds]

I think my idea for beta huntlow is wonderfully captured by, “You’re in the wind, I’m in the water. Nobody’s son, Nobody’s daughter”

[inbarfink]

Okay, so I already wrote a bunch of stuff about how that scene, although it is really sweet, is also kind of a Bad Sign for Simon - how he refuses to learn the Obvious Lesson from the Winterworld adventure (that being the Ice King again is probably a really really bad idea). But I want to talk about it also a little more about what it means for Fionna’s character as well. 

Because while sitting around and wallowing in self-loathing is probably bad for Fionna, especially after being told that she shouldn't be allowed to exist, and Simon is right to try and get her out of her funk. It's also still worthwhile for Fionna to have some introspection about the Consequences of Her Actions. Because she and Cake really did not consider them at all at first. They have a sense of morality and an instinct towards heroism, but they also tend to kinda forget the fantastical worlds they visit don’t exist entirely for their fantasy and have kind of a Protagonist-Centered-Morality fallacy. 

Most obviously you can see it in the market in Ooo. How Cake, in her excitement, damaged and hurt and even killed

A bunch of innocent marketgoers without even noticing. And then Fionna immediately jumped to Cake’s defense against these ‘weirdos’, who were actually just normal kinda-righteously-angry Oooian citizens.

It’s actually very similar to the whole Winterworld situation. Fionna’s assumption that she’s automatically the hero and protagonist of the story and black-and-white view of the situation and her tendency to kick ass first and ask questions later meant that she just recklessly injured a lot of innocent people.

(It might’ve been worse actually cause at least in Winterworld she was at least manipulated by an evil Wizard)

Fionna and Cake clearly have a great potential for heroism, but they do need to be a bit more considerate of the situation and people around them. And it does make sense considering that from their perspective - they’ve been living a very ordinary life up until now (and Cake was literally an animal. A very clever animal, but still not bound by the same standards of morality as the talking animals in Ooo). Action and adventure and fantasy stuff has been purely the realm of daydream and video games for them - and Fionna literally speaks about it in these terms.

(also, Fionna's Main Character Syndrome was undoubtedly validated when God literally told her that she was created to be the main character of her universe)

So yeah, it takes them some time to really process how to be heroes - they need to grapple with questions that Finn and Jake already kinda dealt with seventeen years ago. And actually a lot of those; how to resolve a situation without necessarily using violence, when does a 'villain' actually deserve sympathy and kindness, the importance of the larger context of any given conflict... their confrontations with Ice King all played a big part in that. It was never just him, but he was still a very major part.

And for Fionna and Cake right now, learning these lessons require some amount of personal introspection. So while it was a sweet attempt at comforting, I dunno if Simon’s little ‘the only problem with that universe is that this Alternative Me was terrible because he didn’t even acknowledge or remember Betty as the love of our life and the light of my entire universe’ thing is actually Good. 

I’m not quite sure Simon is the best person to teach Fionna and Cake heroism 101, because he is so focused on the Crown Quest as the thing that brings back Meaning to his life, and because his fatherly instincts just kinda go “Sad Young Person???? MUST GIVE COMFORT!” and also on account of the kidnapping.

I’m sure Fionna is going to become the heroine she dreams about eventually, it’s just going to be a bumpy ride. The best we can hope for is that they accept Simon’s comfort, that she doesn't start believing that she is nothing but an Error for the entire universe like the Scarab claims, but don’t necessarily listen to all of Simon's his words either.

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

august 2024 episode of octavinelle + 4koma update

You know the drill by now!

Spoilers for the 4koma and the Episode of Octavinelle chapter 12 below the cut. As a reminder, the Episode of Savanaclaw won’t be updating again until winter.

🫵 THERE THEY ARE…

THE SMOOTH CRIMINALS…

The poses in this opening page are so good; Leona sat all lax like a boss who knows who’s large and in charge, Ruggie leaning against the chair and swinging the keys to the vault around on one finger… The posing perfectly captures their personalities and roles in relationship to one another.

Once again, Azul makes many fantastically desperate and despair-filled expressions this installment 😭

Falling to his knees???? Laying flat on the floor??? Man is UNMATCHED when it comes to theatrics.

I like this shot of Azul and Leona’s gazes lining up; it really helps give you the sense of two rivals sizing each other up.

(Side note: you can also tell how much painstaking detail the artists went through to include their eye makeup in these close-ups. Hats off to them for the extra effort, it looks great!)

… WHY DiD THEY hAvFTA mAkE HIM So smUGHERE 💀

damn i wish i was that stack of contracts

… I mean what

sorry

Sorry

SORRY

I got distracted there, what were we talking about again????

AYO they always make Leona casting King’s Roar look so darn cool in the manga 😭

My favorite panel in this sequence has to be the one with the text bubbles. He looks so nonchalant and a little stern as he speaks the chant… The shadows on his face add a lot to the atmosphere of it!

This chapter is the part where Leona gets to sanding Azul’s hard work away! Look at how beautifully drawn Azul’s reaction is ✨

The particle-y effect of the contracts melting into sand is nice 😌 It feeds Azul’s tears… Tasty meal…

MOU YADA IN MANGA FORM IS PEAK

lmao Azul for real threw a tantrum, flailing his limbs and everything 🤡 Love that even Leona and Ruggie have NO idea how they should respond to this.

Oh no, here comes the OB…

The anguish Azul’s experiencing is really coming through. He’s sweating so much and his entire face is so. Er… for lack of a better term, twisted.

I think seeing the blot leaking out from each of them helps to illustrate that they’re truly being overwhelmed and consumed by their own inner darkness. It’s sad to see 😔

We cut back to Yuuta and co. squaring off against the twins!

I wanted to point out and comment on these parts with Jack. He’s not a character that I usually pay much attention to, but I gotta commend him for fighting back so hard and trying to shield the picture even when he’s clearly got no chance of winning. Jack bearing his fangs at Floyd with pupils contracted… 🫶 Very good and loyal pupper! I get the Jack appeal now, lol

I LOVE THIS

It reminds me of the similar Azul-Leona framing earlier in the chapter, though with a different context. I like that this shows how the twins are in sync and coming to the same terrible conclusion.

Not long after, they rush to Azul’s side—which makes me think that these two worry for his wellbeing 😭 THEY DONmT SAY IT OUT LOUD BUT THEY CARE

Oh yeah, here it comes… OB Azul has arrived!! 👀

I MEAN YEAH it’s not good for his health, but I’m so hyped for the battle and flashbacks to his childhood! Baby!Azul shall NOT escape our sight…

The 4koma this month centers on Jack, Vargas, and others (Jade, Kalim, Deuce) talking about using transformation magic for racing.

dhejeveiwhwuow I would say more, but I actually didn’t find this 4koma that remarkable. It’s a generally the boys chatting about animals and their different activities they excel at.

[demonslayedher]

Determining Ages and Birth Years

Kimetsu no Yaiba’s first official fanbook gave us ages for the many of the main characters, but in a manga where calculating age can be crucial, why are these numbers not so straightforward? Because the Japanese calendar is a mess, and the Taisho period was an in-between stage in many ways. Many new changes were established in the Meiji period but not broadly enforced until the Showa period, including how to count one’s age.

This subject can be terribly complicated, but please follow me below for:

--Historical context for how methods of counting age could differ --Which method I choose to apply to Kimetsu no Yaiba and why --Based on that, a list of my calculations for dates of birth, zodiac signs (Chinese and Western), and because it’s handy, the date each of these characters would have turned 25

In the Taisho period, there are two methods of counting age in play:

Kazoedoshi (“counting years”): Counting the years one has been in alive in, with that year having started on the agricultural new year and counting a new year to one’s age each New Year’s Day after that, like how it is still practiced in South Korea.

Which is to say, you are born at age 1, counting the first calendar year you lived in, and on the following New Year’s Day, you are age 2, even if you have only been out of the womb a very short time.

Mannenrei (“full year age”): Counting only each full 12-month period since your birth as part of your age, like how it is practiced in the United States of America.

Which is to say, you are born at age 0, and after twelve full months have passed, you are age 1.

Kazoedoshi was practiced through most of the Demon Slayer Corp’s history, but the Meiji government enforced a switch to Mannenrei in 1902. However, most people still practiced Kazoedoshi throughout the Meiji, Taisho, and early Showa periods, and it wasn’t until 1950 that the government reinforced the switch to Mannenrei. This is also when, with the influx of American culture due to the post-war occupation, individual birthdays started to be marked with cake and presents. Until that time, people did not pay much attention to their date of birthday besides, perhaps, a passing notion and maybe a shrine or temple visit and a nice dinner (see more on this post). Many people continued to count their own age in Kazoedoshi until 1950, and although some people liked the “oh, actually I’m younger than I thought I was!” surprise (because Manrenrei really was outside of their usual way of thinking), it made centenarians a little sad that they hadn’t actually reached 100.

Similarly, even though the Meiji government enforced a switch to the Gregorian calendar which put New Years on January 1, many people still celebrated a sliding date according to a lunar-based agricultural calendar, like is still done in China. It was likewise later reinforced.

In modern Japan, New Years on Gregorian January 1 and counting age by the Mannenrei system are the norm and standard, however, some customs (especially but not limited to religious customs) are still celebrated according to the agricultural calendar and Kazoedoshi ages. It’s annoying to keep track of and if I had a 5-yen coin for every time I say the Japanese calendar is a mess, I’d have a lot more yen.

The canon of Kimetsu no Yaiba does not specify any of the following: 1. What year most of KnY takes place (but based on clues from the Hand Demon, we can extrapolate that most of it takes place in 1915) 2. Whether the characters’ given ages are according to Kazoedoshi or Mannenrei, and whether the characters’ given birthdates are according to the Gregorian or agricultural calendars 3. Which method the characters use to count New Years and their own age 4. If there are any differences among the cast and how they count these things (like if the city-slickers were with the times and the country bumpkins were not) 5. Whether or not Amane accounted for Mannenrei or Kazoedoshi when stating that all the marked swordsmen of the Sengoku period died by the age of 25

So what are fanfic writers who are preoccupied with canon accuracy to do? How much should the fans of characters who got the mark fret?

After tying my brain in knots (for years, since I attempted tackling this issue years ago and this is my better post addressing the issue(s)), here are the ways that I approach it.

First: I firmly treat most of the events of canon as firmly taking place in Gregorian 1915, with the Final Selection taking place that winter and Muzan’s defeat coming sometime around the very end of 1915 or start of 1916. (See here for how I calculated all the time frames indicated in canon. You’re welcome.)

Second, we have to treat the official fanbook material in the context of how it was published. I think the ages in the fanbook are given in Mannenrei for the benefit of Heisei/Reiwa period readers, but if you really want to dig into it, the characters might interpret their own age differently based on Kazoedoshi, since it was such a prevalent way to count one’s age even for people born in the Taisho period. For example, Tanjirou’s given canon age is 15 (Mannenrei), but if you ask him in-universe, he might say he is 17 (Kazoedoshi).

Even if we assume many of the characters use the agricultural calendar and Kazoedoshi, there is a chance that characters who actively used western technology—for example, Shinobu, who uses textbooks in English microscopes and thermometers that likely came from Germany—had switched to Mannenrei for the sake of more accuracy on an individual basis. It is also possible that the Corp enacted their own standardization to Mannenrei around the time they standardized uniforms and updated the payment structure. If this is the case, it might have required country bumpkins to rethink the systems they had always been used to. Tanjirou, if asked in-universe once he is a Corp member, would therefore say he is 15 (Mannenrei).

The places the Kazoedoshi/Mannenrei difference has more implications is where characters have stated their own age. For example, Himejima seems to use a Mannenrei system (he states that he became a Hashira at age 19, and now is clearly over the age of 25, with his canonical age being recorded as 27. The numbers check out). This makes me more curious about Muichirou, who has a canonical given age of 14, but says in his own recollection that he was 10 when he was orphaned, and 11 when Yuichirou died.

If Mannenrei: It was four years or more ago that his parents died, and then sometime after he and Yuichirou turned 11 on Gregorian August 8, the demon attacked on a hot summer night. If Kazoedoshi: It was four years or more ago that his parents died. New Years passed that winter and he and Yuichirou turned 11. Many more months passed before the demon attacked on a hot summer night. However, if the Corp enforces his Mannenrei age of 14, but being a country bumpkin with a fuzzy memory, Muichirou still thinks of himself in Kazoedoshi, thereby making him think of himself as 16: It was six years or more ago that his parents died. New Years passed that winter and he and Yuichirou turned 11. Many more months passed before the demon attacked on a hot summer night. He nonetheless became a Hashira relatively recently (according to aligning Kyojuro-related flashback material and the second fanbook making passing mention that he hasn’t been a Hashira that long so his impression of the others isn’t that deep). This implies he spent a very, very, very, very long time incapacitated before he could so much as hold a sword, let alone join the Final Selection.

So what if we consider the opposite, that every given age is in Kazoedoshi? That would mean that when the fanbook and Tanjirou say he is 15, we would translate that back to a Mannenrei age of 13. And, dear readers, do you really want to imagine the entire cast being one or two years younger than their given age? I didn’t think so.

It is already very, very difficult to determine the order of Kimetsu no Yaiba canon both due to incomplete histories and canonical errors introduced by outside material (Ufotable animating Kanao’s May 19 encounter with the Kochou sisters with a winter setting, or Hirano-sensei drawing a spread of all nine Hashira in a 1913 setting) or timeline errors introduced in the original manga likely due to oversight (Gotouge drawing Aoi in uniform shortly after Kanae’s death when Aoi is later stated to have attended the same Final Selection as Muichirou, who at the time Kanae died is likely still living with his parents). That is why I assume the following rule of thumb:

When ages are given in-universe or in supplementary material, assume it is Mannenrei, because this is a shounen manga and not a math textbook. (As another case in point, the heights of the characters would have made most of the characters giants in Taisho society, though they get away with just being a bit on the tall side in Reiwa society. Some things are simplified for the benefit of modern readers.)

Assume the characters do not pay much attention to their age, or their birthday, because this is a shounen manga with a lot of dedication to historical settings and folk traditions (and those folks didn’t pay much attention to their birthdays).

Ergo: If the Corp tells its members “this is your Mannenrei age, use it. When we say 25, we have already done the math from our Sengoku period records and we mean 25 in Mannenrei,” the Corp members probably accept that. However, the Corp members might think of it as having two ages for two different purposes. Given the prevalence of Kazoedoshi, in their heart, they might still think of New Years as the time when you collectively celebrate everyone’s birthday.

Since I’m assuming Mannenrei, I’m also assuming Gregorian birthdates, and assuming everyone’s given canon age to be the age they were during the Infinity Fortress battle that took place roughly around New Year’s Day 1916.

Why am I picking this date? Because this is when the first fanbook was published, and it treated canon as it was occurring at that time in publication, so Akaza, Douma, and Kokushibou were not yet given the “eliminated” status (also, Rengoku was given already called “former” Flame Hashira. Shinobu’s demise had not yet been published in the serialization).

I also say “roughly New Year” because of the agricultural/Gregorian calendar issues. The agricultural New Year’s Day in 1916 would have fallen on Gregorian February 4, but because I’m treating this as the Corp having adopted Mannenrei, I’m also having them treat Gregorian January 1 as New Years. Because Ubuyashiki Nichika and Hinaki were singing a New Years song when Muzan strolled in to visit, that leans credence toward it happening around then. More crucially, cherry blossoms are in full bloom “three months later,” which aligns it best with Gregorian January 1, since late March/early April is when you are most likely to get the full bloom of the most common somei-yoshino cherry trees.

It’s also a convenient date and time in the plot to measure by because all their birthdays would have passed for that year, barely including Nezuko’s. (But if Mugen Ressha took place prior to May, like I have calculated before… does this mean Rengoku would have been part of Team 21? My gosh, I’m crying. For this list, I’m treating it as the age he would have been relative to the others on that date.)

Tl;dr: I’m assuming you can treat every canon age as Mannenrei, and totally ignore Kazoedoshi in the first place (unless if it will help you be crafty in your fic, because there’s still a good case to be made for the characters using it).

Now here is the fanfic reference list I promised, including: 1. Their date of birth according to the Gregorian calendar, calculated based their canon age being their Mannenrei age as of December 31, 1915. 2. Their birth year according to the Japanese period 3. The year they would have turned 25 4. Their Chinese zodiac sign (yes, I know there is argument about whether or not you can say “zodiac” here, but this isn’t the place to start a new topic. Anyway, I’ve also included the elements for each year for the deep nerds who anticipate it) (also I’m really sorry, Inosuke is not born in the Year of the Boar, nor is Iguro born in the Year of the Snake) 5. Their Western zodiac sign (yes, I know there was a recalculation of sun signs some years back, but no, I’m not bothering to take that into account, this post is complicated enough as it is) Important caveat: I'm bad at math.

Kamado Tanjirou: July 14, 1900/Meiji 33 (1925/Taisho 14), Metal Rat, Cancer Kamado Nezuko: December 28, 1901/Meiji 34 (1926/Taisho 15), Metal Ox, Capricorn Agatsuma Zenitsu: September 3, 1899/Meiji 32 (1924/Taisho 13), Earth Boar, Virgo Hashibira Inosuke: April 22 (as was written on his fundoshi along with his name), 1900/Meiji 33 (1925/Taisho 14), Metal Rat, Taurus Tsuyuri Kanao: May 19 (chosen for the day she encountered the Kochou sisters), 1899/Meiji 32 (sometime in 1924??/Taisho 13??), Earth Boar(?), Taurus (???) Shinazugawa Genya: January 7, 1899/Meiji 32  (1924/Taisho 13) – by Gregorian/modern Japanese system he is an Earth Boar, but the agricultural New Year wasn’t until February 10 that year, so he might instead be considered an Earth Dog, Capricorn Tomioka Giyuu: February 8, 1894/Meiji 27 (1919/Taisho 8), Wood Horse, Aquarius Kochou Shinobu: February 24, 1897/Meiji 30 (1822/Taisho 11), Fire Rooster, Pisces Rengoku Kyoujurou: May 10, 1895/Meiji 28 (1920/Taisho 9), Wood Sheep, Taurus Uzui Tengen: October 31, 1892/Meiji 25 (1917/Taisho 6), Water Dragon, Scorpio Kanroji Mitsuri: June 1, 1896/Meiji 29 (1921/Taisho 10), Fire Monkey, Gemini Tokitou Muichirou: August 8, 1901/Meiji 34 (1926/Taisho 15), Metal Ox, Leo Himejima Gyoumei: August 23, 1888/Meiji 21 (1913/Taisho 2), Earth Rat, Virgo Shinazugawa Sanemi: November 29, 1894/Meiji 27 (1919/Taisho 8), Wood Horse, Sagittarius Iguro Obanai: September 15,1894/Meiji 27 (1919/Taisho 8), Wood Horse, Virgo

Afterword:

Suppose Amane didn’t do the math to state the Sengoku swordsmans’ ages in Mannenrei terms? What if their records were spotty, or she took Kazoedoshi and applied it to swordsmen who now use Mannenrei?

Well, in that case, Tanjirou would probably die sometime in 1923, and Giyuu & Sanemi sometime in 1917. Ergo, I think I will stick with Amane having done the math and converted Sengoku ages to Mannennei if she was going to tell them all something so important.

Also, using Kazoedoshi would totally mess with the Kimetsu Gakuen AU.

[redtsundere-writes]

Part 26: The Proposal

King!SukunaRyomen x Servant!FemReader

Summary: You used to be just another servant among the army of humans operating under the command of the terrible king, Sukuna Ryomen. An ordinary human who only knows how to wash, clean and cook. Until one day, he notices something in you that you hadn't seen before.

Tags: MDNI. +18. Murder. Blood. Cannibalism. Sukuna Ryomen Is The Warning Itself. Nudity. Sexual Display. Vaginal. Fingering. Sometimes fluff, sometimes angst. Beta read.

Word Count: 7734 words.

Beginning. | ← Previous | Next →

“Yorozu?” King Gojo asked you.

Hundreds of eyes watched you with deadly curiosity. All the air in your lungs tightened after hearing that name. You may have killed her, but you were still bound to her for life. Blood is thicker than water. She had told you that she had met the divine man in front of you, but why did he ask you about her? Rather, why did he confuse you if they had already met? That bitch was surely mocking you from the urn you decorated for her.

“Huh?” Was the only thing you could answer, in shock.

Gojo leaned to inspect you more closely, making the difference of height more evident. Even though he was not as tall as Sukuna, he still towered over you. His eyes narrowed, and his thin white eyebrows came together as he scanned your face carefully.

“Oh, you are different.” Gojo blinked a few times as if he had noticed something that wasn't there before. "You must be…"

"Her sister." You closed your hands into fists to control the whirlwind of emotions that her simple name caused in you.

"Oh, I see!" Gojo returned to his normal, long and elegant posture, with a big pearly smile. "How is she?" He asked as if they were old friends who hadn't seen each other in years.

"She passed away," you answered honestly.

"Oh…" It was the only thing Gojo could say, not expecting that answer. "What did she die of?"

"I killed her" was not an answer you wanted to say openly with hundreds of judging eyes floating around you. You were going to answer with some illness, but King Nanami interjected into the conversation.

"King Gojo, please be more careful," Nanami implored him. “I’m sorry for your loss, young lady.” He looked at you with pitying eyes.

His kind, yet direct way of speaking reminded you of an old friend of yours. A boy with his head in books, always trying to help everyone, with a strong sense of justice. The person who taught you how to read. Being so busy worrying about yours and your sister’s survival, you hadn’t taken the time to miss him. What a terrible friend you were.

“Don’t worry, King Nanami.” You gave him a sad smile. This was your chance to draw pity to you. “King Sukuna killed my sister.”

The crowd gasped around you upon hearing that terrible event. You refrained from smiling in satisfaction as you found the perfect way to distance yourself from the terrible tyrant so you could spy on the nobility. Even though he dressed you like a princess from head to toe, that fact now made you look like a poor lost soul being dragged along by the king of curses. To the surprise of the newly arrived kings, Commander Naoya approached them.

“This is Y/n, the maid that King Sukuna brought," he whispered the context to them.

“Is King Sukuna here?” Nanami opened his eyes in perplexity.

“This evening is just beginning, and it's already gotten interesting. I'm so glad that you forced me to come, Nanamin!” Gojo exclaimed excitedly, downplaying the fact that the king of curses was under the same roof.

“He's in a private meeting with King Toji. They shouldn't be long,” Naoya answered Nanami's question.

"So he beat me to it, damn!" Gojo raised his eyebrow before lowering the white blindfold over his eyes.

That last sentence caught your attention. King Gojo wanted to see your king too? Why? That was your new mission: find out what he wanted from the King of Curses.

"Well, it seems I'll have to wait until they're done." Gojo sighed angrily. "I'll have to entertain myself with a pretty lady in the meantime."

The surrounding girls squealed in excitement, raising their hand to be chosen to hang out with his majesty. This was the part you were never good at, getting attention. Despite wearing a dress to kill, you didn't have the confidence to compete with girls who were actually royalty. But this wasn't the time to hesitate, just act. You took a deep breath, filling yourself with courage. If he didn't choose you, you would choose yourself.

"King Gojo, allow me the honor of keeping you company until King Sukuna is free," you offered, bowing to show him the utmost of your respect. His lips parted, surprised by your bravery.

"I'd be a real idiot to say no to a beautiful woman in a daring red dress." King Gojo took your hand gently and kissed your knuckles as if they were fragile rose petals. "The honor is all mine." He smiled flirtatiously at you. You felt the murderous glances of the other girls against your neck, but that was the least of your problems now.

The meeting room was illuminated by the soft flames of the fireplace. The orchid tapestry lay softly on the walls, the symbol of the Zen'in family. Sukuna had his large buttocks on the elegant forest green chair that creaked with each shuffle move, barely supporting his weight. King Toji uncorked a bottle of sake and poured two glasses as he proudly told him about his kingdom. Despite the calm sound, the tension could be felt with every breath. Two powerful kings, faithful enemies who never thought they would meet, were now in the same room.

“I was supposed to open this bottle when my baby was born, but I think this is an even more impressive moment than life itself.” King Toji commented as he handed one of the glasses to Sukuna. “Let's make a toast, what do you think?” Toji said as he sat down on the opposite chair.

“What are we toasting to?” Sukuna asked disinterestedly.

“There are many reasons. The bright future, the stability of our kingdoms, having beautiful women by our side, just to mention a few examples.”

Sukuna saw his reflection in the glass. He wondered what you were doing at that moment. Probably gawking at the orchestra or talking to some polite duchess, trying your best not to be obvious enough that you were a spy. The corner of his lip smiled as he thought how lucky he was that he hadn't killed you the day he met you. If he had, he wouldn't have the perfect queen and the mother of his future children by his side. It was amazing how you did whatever he wanted without batting an eyelid, where had you been all this time?

“You said you wanted to do business,” Sukuna reminded him, returning to his role as the insolent king.

“A little conversation doesn't kill anyone.” Toji took a sip of his glass before placing it on the table.

His posture went from relaxed to attentive. He straightened his spine against the chair, placed both feet on the floor, and bowed his torso to the tyrant in front of him. Toji had to think very carefully about his next move. He knew the proposal was very good, but he wasn't dealing with a normal king. This was the king of curses, the one who cares about nothing but himself and his curses. For the simple fact that he was a human, there was a high chance that King Sukuna would reject him completely.

“I imagine you know the Kamo’s very well,” Toji asked.

The Kamo Kingdom. Located south of the Gojo Kingdom and east of the New Sukuna Kingdom. One of the three most powerful sorcerer families in the world. Persevering, agile and highly traditional. 500 years ago, they were a much more powerful kingdom than the Gojo and Zen'in combined… until Sukuna came along.

“A little, why?” Sukuna raised his eyebrow.

“You see, 100 years ago, the sorcerer kingdoms formed an alliance to help each other in case of an invasion by curses.” Toji explained.

Sukuna was aware of that thanks to Kenjaku. After Sukuna conquered the land of the Kamo and King Jogo took part of the land of the Gojo. The kingdoms of Gojo, Zen’in, Nanami, Yaga, Geto and Tsukumo signed an agreement where they established the necessary measures that would be taken in case a curse conquered their lands. Everyone signed except the Kamo, who were very upset with the other kingdoms, because no one helped them when he attacked them. The Kamo's never forget.

“Not only did they not sign the agreement, but they also closed their doors to the other sorcerer kingdoms forever. Now they only dedicate themselves to killing curses by tradition. It may be a small kingdom, but you must know that they are very powerful.” Toji poured another glass of sake for Sukuna.

“And what does that have to do with me?” Sukuna took the glass and drank it with disdain.

“If I want to get close to the Kamo, I must do it with something that catches their attention, and you have just what I need.” Toji explained. “The human commune that you own may have descendants of the Kamo.” Sukuna could not help but burst out laughing.

“Believe me, there is none. I dedicated myself to killing each one of those bastards 500 years ago.” Sukuna sneered. “Also, those rats don't believe in sorcerers, nor have my curses reported any sorcerers to me. If there was a plague like that, I would have already taken the time of day to eradicate it.”

“They may not be sorcerers, but those "rats" are still descendants of the Kamo.” Toji laughed at the absurd nickname. “I propose the following: you give me 20 humans from the commune in exchange for leaving the forest of curses free of Zen'in sorcerers. What do you think?”

He smiled, satisfied with himself, it was a great proposal. Toji got a key to enter the Kamo kingdom, and Sukuna got the curses to live in peace in the forest. A good win-win. Unfortunately, King Zen'in didn't consider a minor detail. Sukuna kept looking at him, annoyed.

“The forest of curses? Why should I care about that shitty place?”

“Because you are the king of curses?” The human king raised his eyebrow.

“Because I rule over them, not because I care about them.” Sukuna crossed his arms, annoyed at being wasted of his time with idiotic proposals.

King Toji's nostrils flared as he noticed the small problem in his proposal. He had thought wrong when he thought Sukuna cared about his curses, but that wasn't the case. He didn't care about anything but himself. He had underestimated him. The king of curses was much worse than he believed.

“If you don't make that deal with me, you'll leave me no choice but to take what I want by force,” Toji said.

“Good luck with the Impossible Belt,” Sukuna defended.

“If Commander Naoya can cross it, any other Zen'in can.” Toji smiled, proud of his troops.

Sukuna squeezed the glass, but stopped as soon as the porcelain creaked under his fingers. It turns out that he had also underestimated the Zen'in. He had always thought that Commander Naoya came to Sukuna's kingdom by sea, but now it turned out that he also crossed it by land, like you and your family. How come he was just finding out that his greatest defense was failing in such an embarrassing way? The first thing he would do upon returning home was to find out why the defenses were so low.

"What is there to think?" Toji leaned in to speak directly to him. "Take the deal, it's the easiest route for both of us. I'll get what I want and leave you alone."

"How much of a foul do you think I am?" Sukuna asked with an offended smile. "Once you obtain your alliance with the Kamo, what guarantees me that you won't attack me afterward?"

"You need some trust issues to solve," Toji sneered.

"You eventually lose everything when you trust," Sukuna replied before taking his glass.

“I can't offer you anything more than a promise,” Toji looked him straight in the eyes. “You can choose. Do we walk hand in hand, or do I have to go against you?”

Sukuna smiled offended at the threat, and Toji imitated the gesture when he understood his clear answer. It was already official what the final decision was. The black-haired man poured the last round of sake. He had already lost count of how many he had drunk so far.

“May the best sorcerer win,” Toji toasted, clearly referring to himself. Sukuna smiled at him.

“You are seeing him.” Sukuna elegantly gulped the light alcohol to the sound of Toji's glass crashing against the floor.

The dance followed its natural rhythm. People danced, ate and established political relationships that you could barely understand. This dance was very different from the ones you were used to. They always used to be in smaller mansions, people were already drunk by this point and Yorozu was making out with some military man in the dark hallways. King Gojo was gently caressing Queen Nozomi’s belly as they talked about their trip to the kingdom. He already wanted to dance with you, but King Nanami forced him to greet the Zen’in first out of politeness. “Sukuna hasn’t come back yet.” You looked worriedly at the hallway where he had disappeared.

“Excuse me, miss.” King Nanami approached your side, pulling you away from your thoughts. “I know this is none of my business, but if you want to escape from King Sukuna, I will help you. Just give the order and I will move earth and sea to keep you safe.” He whispered in your ear.

That was the first time you had been offered help in a long time. You stared at King Nanami, dumbfounded. Despite his serious and reserved face, there was a hint of assertiveness in his voice. Something that made you trust him, that intrigue you hadn't felt in a long time.

"I couldn't. Sukuna would start a stealthy search for my head." You excused yourself, although you were afraid that would be the case if you dared to even think about it.

Nanami thought about his options. "I have a mansion on No Man's Island. I could help you get there without any problem."

You remembered that Sukuna had told you about the war that took place to conquer No Man's Island, and that it was now a vacation land that was difficult to access. You were sure that even he would look for you there too if you were to lose sight of him.

"Thank you for the offer, but I really must return to Sukuna's kingdom. Not for the king, but for my family," you answered, thinking of Mrs. Inoue and Mr. Wasuke.

“If you change your mind, I'll be here to serve you.” Nanami accepted your answer.

“Hey, Nanamin, stop flirting with my lady.” King Gojo pushed him in a friendly manner to take your hand. “Let's dance, the night is young.”

“Be nice to her, King Gojo.” King Nanami told him before greeting Queen Nozomi.

King Gojo had an impressive way of commanding the room with just his presence. As soon as they went down the stairs that led to the dance floor, the orchestra changed songs and the people with their mouths agape moved out of the way to give him all the space in the world. They stood in the center and bowed to introduce themselves. Their white clothes fell like light feathers as he smiled at you, excited to take possession of you. To the beat of the soft piano, you slowly approached. He held you tightly by the waist and extended your arm to put you in position.

There was something strange in the air as you danced. When you danced with Commander Naoya, everyone looked at you badly, but now that you were dancing with Gojo, it felt like you had shocked everyone. Although maybe it was just the change of dance partner, it was as if there was something you couldn't quite understand.

"Maybe this is none of my business, but how can you see with the blindfold on?" You asked to make some conversation, it was the best way to get the answers you wanted.

"Only the weak use their eyes to see." Gojo answered with a flirtatious smile. "I don't need my eyes to know what your body is like." His hand moved nimbly down your back as a shiver ran down your spine. "I don't need my eyes to know that you are a fine woman." He brought his face closer to your neck to breathe in your perfume. "I don't need my eyes to know how soft your skin is." He lightly bit your earlobe, causing you to gulp as your face turned the same color as your dress. Gojo smiled as he caught that. “I don’t need my eyes to know you’re nervous.”

“How could I not be when you’re acting like that in front of everyone?” You asked, avoiding his face.

“How could I not be, when you deserve for me to be on my knees in front of you?” He answered your question. “And not exactly to pray to you.” He purred before planting a kiss on your cheek.

“What’s wrong with this guy?!” You wondered, flabbergasted. He was so blunt that it even seemed offensive to you, but something inside you wanted him to continue disrespecting you. “No! You’re a spy and you’re engaged!” You scolded yourself as you came back to reality.

The song ended and a round of applause enveloped them. The next song immediately began to play, enclosing them in the crowd of people. You were excited to get back on the track with the others, but Satoru pulled you by the arm. You didn't know exactly how, but everything stopped around you. As if it were a game of statues, everything fell silent. There was no music, dancing steps or conversations. You turned your gaze to King Satoru, and he gave you a smile as if you were alone in the world. He pulled you with him towards the nearest hallway to get away from everyone.

Queen Nozomi quickly noticed your disappearance. She analyzed the situation cautiously. King Gojo seemed very interested in you, but why? There was only one way to find out. She let out a sigh of tiredness due to her pregnancy, caressing her belly with a certain protective air.

"Commander Naoya, you know what to do," the queen ordered the man resting next to her.

"Yes, my queen," he answered seriously before disappearing like the wind.

The sound came back, and you regained your balance suddenly as soon as he closed the door behind you. You ran through the halls like two naughty children, escaping from their parents to play away from everyone. You climbed several stairs and walked through several candle-lit hallways as if the king knew exactly where to go. Gojo took you to a huge room that was illuminated only by the power of the full moon on the huge skylight. The signs couldn't be more obvious. Targets, cursed weapons displayed on the walls and sandbags suspended above the floor. You quickly deduced it was a training room.

"I thought you would like some privacy," Satoru told you as he walked around the place as if it were his home. "The truth is that I wanted to keep dancing," you thought, disappointed.

"Yes, thank you," you lied. "Can we be here?" You asked when you saw that all the candles were out.

"I am King Gojo Satoru, special guest. The only thing that limits me is my imagination,” he commented with certain superiority as he approached the wall that displayed several daggers with different edges.

Besides being a mortal enemy of your king, something was not right with the way he acted. You did not feel comfortable like you did with King Nanami. That did not mean he was a bad person, but you had to be alert in case he wanted to take advantage of you. You remembered the dagger that rested on your thigh. You blushed as you remembered the ghost trail he left behind.

“Why don't you entertain me with your technique?” Gojo asked you before giving you one of the daggers.

“Excuse me? Technique?” You stuttered, almost cutting yourself with the blade from the shock.

“Yes, you have a very interesting technique like your sister's,” Gojo smiled at you.

“Umm... I don't have any technique, you must be confused.” You tried to return the dagger, but he didn't receive it.

Gojo removed the white blindfold from his eyes, revealing his beautiful crystalline lagoons. There was that feeling of exposure, despite being dressed, it was as if you were baring your soul. Gojo noticed that you had an enormous amount of cursed energy just like Yorozu, but instead of flowing through your body, it focused on your eyes, just like his.

“I've never been so sure in my life, you have a technique and a very good one if you ask me.” The king put his blindfold back on, but still managed to see your face in shock. “You didn't know?”

“Do I look like I knew?” You asked with a certain sarcasm that came out of your chest. Gojo laughed.

“I think I'm getting it now,” Gojo smiled in a moment of eureka. “When I told your sister that she had an impressive technique, she also made fun of me. She told me that sorcerers didn't exist and that I was crazy.”

“Oh, Yorozu,” you thought sadly. In her defense, that was the upbringing they had grown up with. Sorcerers were just legendary characters who were supposed to one day come to protect them from the tyranny of Sukuna Ryomen, but they remained as simple myths. You realized that everything was real once you met Uraume, and it became concrete with everything that Kenjaku has taught you about sorcery.

“Where we come from, Sukuna took it upon himself to get rid of all possible sorcerers, so all the humans in Sukuna's kingdom don't know that they exist. They are our hope, but they have never come to save us.” You explained with some sadness.

“It's because sorcerers only kill curses, not save people,” he explained.

“Isn't it the same thing?” You raised an eyebrow.

“You'll realize the difference when you become one.” Gojo took your hand and guided you towards the targets. “I will baptize you.”

You already understood why you didn't trust him. Unlike Nanami, who tried to help you out of your situation. King Gojo, the most powerful sorcerer of this generation, didn't offer you anything. The fact that you were Sukuna's servant suited him well, as if it were normal. Gojo placed you about 20 meters from a target, like when you practiced archery.

“Throw the dagger towards the center of the target,” he ordered you.

You had never thrown a dagger in your life, but there is always a first time for everything, right? You handled it by the handle, took a deep breath and threw it with all the strength you could muster. The dagger traced an erratic arc in the air, spinning clumsily before falling to the ground with a metallic crash. The echo of the impact resonated longer than you would have liked. You felt the heat rise to your cheeks at that terrible attempt. Gojo mocked mercilessly, but with his characteristic carefree tone, he handed you another dagger.

“Now, pay close attention,” Gojo stood behind you and took your head so that you would direct your gaze forward. He corrected your posture by pushing your back and grabbed your chin tightly. “Focus on the center and when you feel that you are in it, throw the dagger. Forget everything that is around you, ignore any distraction. The only thing that matters now is you and your target. Ignore everything else. My touch, my voice, the moon, everything…”

Your eyes sharpened, focusing at the center of the target with precision. The yellow dot was the only thing that mattered to you now. You had experienced this before. The trance, the need to do something, the focus. The ice block, the blows to Mahito, the arrow in Naoya's back, and your sister's head. You pushed that out of your head to focus on what mattered now. You exhaled and threw the dagger when all you could feel was the yellow dot.

The dagger flew through the air. You squealed when you saw that you threw it too far to the left, and it was going to end up on the ground again, but it changed its path in the air like a boomerang until it stuck perfectly in the yellow center. “That's physically impossible” you thought confused.

“Like your sister, the nature of your technique is object manipulation. Yours is simpler but no less powerful.” Gojo explained as you picked up the daggers used. “Your technique works like this: If you focus one hundred percent on your target, the object to which you transmit your cursed energy is destined to hit the target one hundred percent of the time.”

“Even if my aim is terrible?” You asked confused.

“That's what makes your technique interesting. You could throw a dagger in the opposite direction, and it would deviate to the right path if you were very focused on your target.” He explained.

You looked at your hands and smiled to yourself. You finally had something worthy to offer your king beyond your skills as a housewife and a womb to give him an heir. You had a technique, you were a sorceress. You would make the most of this power.

Sukuna and Toji staggered back to the grand ball. It was past midnight, but the night was still young. The nobles were still dancing, but with their left feet from all the extravagant alcohol they had consumed. Queen Nozomi interrupted her conversation with King Nanami to give her husband a kiss. Sukuna scanned the great hall. It should be easy to find his girl over the sea of ​​white fabric, but it wasn't. Not a single red sequin was to be seen in the place. This was the exact reason why he had chosen that color.

“Where is my servant?” Sukuna roared in annoyance.

“Don’t worry, she’s with King Gojo,” King Nanami replied.

Although he was a king used to dealing with curses for as long as he could remember, he had never seen eyes as terrifying as King Sukuna’s fiery rubies. An icy chill slid down his spine, leaving him shaking like a leaf in the middle of a storm. Before he could react, one of Sukuna’s claws closed tightly around the collar of his shirt, like a silent but lethal warning.

“Where is she?!” He demanded.

You took a deep breath and stared at the center of the target again. Your eyebrows drew closer, you stuck out the tip of your tongue and your eyes were glued to that fucking yellow that called your name. You were about to throw the dagger, but King Gojo grabbed your shoulders. You lost your concentration as soon as you let go of the dagger. It flew until it got stuck into the edge of the target.

"Damn..." You muttered.

"That's what happens when you lose concentration." Gojo playfully patted your shoulders. "It's a unique technique and takes a long time to perfect." He gave you an encouraging smile.

"Thank you for taking the time to teach me." You bowed to show your gratitude.

"Anything for a beautiful colleague." He winked at you.

"Colleague?”

“Of course! You're a sorceress now! You're one of us!” Gojo dramatically threw his arms out to welcome you into his wonderful world. “I'm sure you'll have a bright future ahead of you and, maybe, you could even be the one to defeat King Sukuna.”

“Me? Defeat the king?”, you thought, mouth agape. It wasn't possible that someone who had just discovered his powers could stand up to King Sukuna. An entire nation of sorcerers couldn't stand up to him, how would you be capable of something like that?

“That would be insane,” you whispered as you turned around to drop the subject, but King Gojo grabbed your arm and pulled you into his body.

“I've never been more sane in my entire life, young lady.”

One of his hands cupped your cheek tenderly. His face was the personification of a snowy night. His fingertips traced the curve of your warm cheek, and his index finger traced your jaw. A flirtatious smile escaped his lips as he realized you were enthralled under his touch.

“Marry me,” he proposed.

“What?!” You asked, offended.

You tore your face away from his touch, but he pulled you back towards him. He spun you on your heels until you were pinned against the nearest wall. He placed one of his long hands next to your head and moved closer until he was mere inches from your nose.

“Maybe that wasn’t the best way to ask,” Gojo reflected on his actions.

“N-no, not at all,” you stammered. “I-I’m s-sorry, but I can’t accept.”

“Is it because of King Sukuna?” Gojo inquired. “I’m stronger than him. I'm willing to tear you away from him for your hand in matrimony.”

“That would start a war!” You warned.

“So what? I'll do anything to have you by my side.”

“But you don't know anything about me…”

“It's a good thing we have a lifetime to do it.” Gojo leaned towards you, getting dangerously close until his nose caught that peculiar scent, one he hadn't perceived in a long time. “Your sweet lips don't deserve this horrible taste, Satoru.”

His thin lips crashed against yours. His hidden eyes expanded as he realized it was the same taste he longed to taste every night. Bitter, burnt, greasy… It was just as he remembered it. He pushed his body against yours to deepen that sensation he once thought lost.

Your hands went straight to his chest in an attempt to push him away, but he was taller and stronger than you. You still didn't understand how you had gotten into this situation, but you had to stop him at all costs. This wasn't supposed to happen. You were only with him to get information of any kind, not for him to shove his tongue down your throat in search of something you didn't even know you had. Your eyes widened as soon as you felt his huge erection on your stomach, and just when you thought it couldn't get any worse. It got worse.

"Get down." Gojo warned before suddenly pulling you to the ground.

You fell to the ground with Gojo on top of you. Your mind was barely trying to understand what was happening until you saw the huge figure on the other side of the room. "Now he's going to kill me" you thought as you saw Sukuna with the face of a thousand demons and two of his fingers in front of him. Dust fell on your back, you looked up to realize there was a large cut in the wall at the height of your neck. "He almost killed me" you thought with teary eyes. This was your end.

“It seems your meeting with King Toji is over.” Gojo commented before getting up to greet his enemy, completely ignoring that you were still on the ground. “I wanted to meet you sooner, but your servant offered to keep me company.” “You’re not helping me, King Gojo,” you scolded him in your mind.

“I’m glad. She’ll also keep you company in the afterlife when I’m done with you two.” Sukuna said before giving you a murderous look that made you look away in shame.

It’s been a long time since he saw that expression on your face, not since the hunt. Your lower lip was trembling, and your body was frozen. His body was tense, he no longer knew if it was because of the betrayal or the tears falling from your eyes. You were scared, or rather, terrified, but that didn’t matter, this was something he had to do.

“No one threatens me and lives to tell.” Gojo smiled before attacking him head on.

Sukuna Ryomen. The one and only, the myth, the legend. Everything and nothing was known about him, an enigma shrouded in fame and obscurity. Now he was there, facing the sorcerer king who was afraid of nothing, and he wasn't going to waste the opportunity to understand him better, even if it was through the clash of forces. Sukuna didn't hesitate for a moment; he responded to the attack with a fury that only a curse of his caliber could unleash.

The sorcerer and the terrible curse faced each other hand to hand in a duel that seemed straight out of an epic. You could barely follow the speed of their movements; their attacks were an unstoppable whirlwind, but to you, the outcome was as clear as water. With impeccable precision, Gojo launched a blow directly into Sukuna's stomach, sending him flying to the other end of the room with the force of a hurricane. Before Sukuna could react, Gojo, lightning fast, had already appeared behind him, ready to continue the battle.

“I’m going to show off just because the lady is watching,” Gojo whispered to him with a proud smile. Sukuna tried to elbow him, but it disappeared completely.

Gojo’s quick movements were beginning to deeply irritate Sukuna. He was like an annoying mosquito, slippery and impossible to swat. Although Gojo had a thinner build, that didn’t make him any less dangerous. Each blow was calculated to aim for the vital organs, forcing Sukuna to stay alert.

Intending to finish quickly, Sukuna tried to slash as he always did: direct and lethal. But something strange was happening; his claws were unable to pierce the barrier protecting Gojo. Frustrated, he threw a random slash that passed dangerously close to you, tearing the skirt of your dress. Any further, and you could have lost your leg. Panic took over you. “I have to get out of here,” you thought as fear chilled your body.

Meanwhile, Gojo, with an almost theatrical grace, landed softly on one of the ruined platforms. His eyes shone with satisfaction. He had seen enough. Sukuna was everything they said: strong, fast and skilled enough to keep up with him. Perfect. He had accomplished his goal for the night, and now it was up to him to decide what his next move would be.

“Look, I don’t think it’s fair the young lady sees more of this fight. Why don’t we call it even?” Gojo proposed, but only received a frustrated grunt from his great opponent. “I’ll take that as a ‘yes’.” Gojo smiled. “See you later, beautiful.” He said goodbye to you before disappearing.

“That idiot left me with him!” You thought in surprise. You were about to get up and run away, but you saw Sukuna walking like a tiger savoring its prey. You thought about taking the dagger from your thigh and defending yourself. You stared at his exposed neck. “What are you thinking?” You couldn’t kill your king. Tears kept falling down your face. You couldn’t do anything to hurt him after he had treated you so lovingly. You remembered his attentive gazes, his warm hugs, his soft kisses in what seemed like your last seconds of life. You loved him so much that you couldn’t hurt him, even if it was self-defense. You preferred a thousand times that he ended your life than you ended his.

You closed your eyes, thinking that you had reached the end of the road. Of all the reasons, he would kill you for adultery. Infidelity against you. Oh, life is funny. What was the taste of death? Bitter and short, or peaceful but elongated? You were about to find out… One, two, three seconds passed. Nothing. You opened one eye and only saw a hand stretched out in front of you. Sukuna was offering you his help to get up with a distressed look.

The blindfold fell from your eyes, and you saw the pawns you could play with. A simple glance at the board and you already knew how to win a game that seemed lost from the start. The stroke of luck was so strong it almost knocked you out. You were going to take the game seriously once and for all. The plan, which you had started a month ago, was finally bearing fruit. Tonight, you would return home.

“Are you okay?” He asked you.

Sukuna brought one of his hands closer to help you up. Clearly, you were scared, it was the first time you saw him in the middle of combat. Although the bitterness of defeat embarrassed his throat in a lump that was impossible to undo, it was much worse to see you cry because of his murderous instinct. Your eyes saw his hand, but you completely ignored his gesture of kindness and got up on your own, shaking the dust off your dress.

“You almost killed me…” You said with a shaky voice, you clenched your skirt in frustration.

“I only did it so that idiot would leave you alone.” Sukuna growled, they were in enemy lands, there was no time for drama. “I knew he would save you one way or another.”

“What if that wasn't the case? What if he had saved just himself? My head would be on the floor right now.” You burst into tears, feeling the end of your neck.

“If you weren't making out with him, this wouldn't have happened.” Sukuna gave you a reproachful look in order to calm you down.

“Ah! So now it's my fault?” Your offended eyes lashed out at him like whips, as if he had kicked your dog. “You put me in this sexy red dress that highlights every curve in my body and expected no man to approach me?!” You exclaimed, transforming your sadness into anger.

Sukuna ground his molars at that statement, but you were right. His plan for you to wear a red dress to make you stand out had backfired to him. You stood out so much that all the men were looking at you. More attractive men, kind men, normal men…

“Still, you shouldn’t have kissed that idiot!” Sukuna roared in an attempt to silence your screams, but it only turned the conversation into a heated argument.

“For your information, I was just doing what you asked when he was the one who kissed me! I tried to back off, but he looked like he wanted a bite of the hot stuff you made!” You complained again.

“I can’t believe you couldn’t be loyal to me for one night.” He scoffed angrily, crossing his arms twice.

“Loyalty? You want to talk about loyalty? I’ve been nothing but loyal to you since I met you. I washed your body for you, ate human flesh for you, jumped out of a tree for you, studied for you, trained for you. Not only that, but I killed my own sister for you, dammit!” You exclaimed in frustration. The lump in Sukuna’s throat tightened further. “And how do you repay me? You ignored me, walked away, and if it hadn't been for the shameless letter, you wouldn't have asked me to marry me.” You decided to admit your mastercard.

Your words sank into his heart like sharp daggers, revealing a truth that, deep down, he had always suspected, but which was now completely exposed. The way you decided to bring that confession to light, at such a critical moment, took him completely by surprise. That letter that he read every night, that he kept as an intimate and tormenting secret, finally had a face. And that face was none other than his beloved.

“So... you're the one who feels that way about me...” Sukuna stammered, forgetting why he was upset in the first place.

“He is so down bad.” You avoided letting out a proud smile to continue with your act. You had turned the situation around. You went from the king being about to kill you, to wanting a hug, like an anxious dog waiting for a bone. The manipulation tactics you had learned from your mother and Yorozu did serve some purpose in the end.

“I’m not sure anymore…” You sighed, shedding another tear. ‘Stretch’. “I don’t know if I can love someone who was about to decapitate me,” you complained quietly.

Sukuna had faced everything: cursed techniques, lethal weapons, stones thrown in fury, deadly poisons and poisoned fruits. His body had resisted each attack without yielding, but nothing prepared him for the devastating impact of the words of the woman who held his heart in the palm of her hand. It was as if she squeezed it hard, until it exploded in an invisible but scorching torrent of blood.

He clenched his fists, trembling with rage and frustration. This was exactly what he had tried to avoid from the beginning: becoming this pathetic and vulnerable being, trapped in the abyss of feelings. This bond, this weakness, connected him to the humanity he despised, and it infuriated him more than any physical wound.

“This was a mistake. I shouldn’t have brought you to the ball.” Sukuna whined, returning to the original conversation.

“Sorry…” You blew your nose, earning the red glare you could barely read. “Sorry for enjoying the attention of a man who doesn’t want to kill me.” You said before threatening to leave the room, dragging the poorly cut train of your dress.

Sukuna followed you with his gaze, thinking he would go after you later after calming down, so as not to cause more scenes in front of all the other nobles. After all, he wasn’t ready for a war.

“Another thing.” You called out to him as you opened the door. “King Gojo proposed to me. I told him no…” You confessed before seeing him for the last time. Sukuna didn’t even flinch at that. “… Don’t make me regret it.” ‘Pull’. You closed the door behind you as you watched his eyes go from frustration to hope.

You made your way into the dimly lit hallway, where the extinguished candles left a trail of smoke barely visible in the air. You had overcome the most difficult part of the plan; now all that was left was to escape. With bated breath, your eyes searched for an exit or a staircase that would take you away from the third floor. Each step resonated with a disturbing echo, reminding you that danger was not yet behind you.

“You have him eating out of your hand, don’t you?” That danger asked behind you.

You had left a demon behind, only to encounter an even more fearsome one. Commander Naoya emerged from the shadows, claiming his territory with an imposing presence. The moonlight outlined his sharp eyes and the impeccable cut of his elegant military suit. Your heart raced, invaded by a wave of adrenaline, as you realized he had heard everything.

“Is that how you do it? You give them a piece of yourself and then leave them wanting more?” He paced around you, a shark swimming in circles to corner his delicious prey. “Looks like you and I are more alike than you think.” He smirked at you before offering you his hand.

“You and I are not alike. I’m doing this for a greater good,” you commented before turning your disdain to his hand. “What are you up to?”

“I’ll help you escape,” he offered.

“Why?”

“I know this castle better than the back of my hand, I’m your best bet.” He evaded the question.

“I don't trust you.” You ignored his hand.

“As you wish, idiot. For all I care, you could jump out the window.” Naoya crossed his arms and ignored you, offended that you didn’t want his help.

“Do the windows open?” You saw that this castle didn't have the giant windows like the ones you were used to. These were small windows with handles to open them, so the air would circulate better.

"Of course the windows open, stupid," Naoya replied. After a few seconds of silence, he looked back at you, but you were no longer there. His green eyes widened when he saw you were opening the window.

"Hey, sorry!" He ran towards you to stop you from committing suicide, but he didn't reach you in time.

You threw yourself out the window, letting the abyss swallow you up. A déjà vu of the day of the hunt was drawn before your eyes, intertwining with the shadows of your nightmares. The contrast between the tenderness of your hero and the ruthless edge of your villain mixed in a mosaic of chaotic emotions. Was this the last thing you would see before you died?

The void seemed eternal, until the roar of adrenaline broke the moment. You belched out a scream that summoned the rainbow dragon Kenjaku had lent you. Its majestic body unfurled itself in the air, catching your fall with precision. You felt the controlled impact as you landed on its back, your back briefly sinking into its soft, dense fur.

You clung to it, allowing vertigo to give way to euphoria in front of the starry night. A wide smile lit up your face as you straightened up, confidently taking a seat on the creature. Your plan had worked perfectly, and victory tasted like freedom. Now, with the wind cutting through your face and phase one completed, you headed home to prepare the next move in your strategy.

“Thank you!” You shouted to Naoya who watched you open-mouthed from the window as you rode away on a dragon that had emerged from your body.

Naoya gritted his molars as he watched you escape in true sorceress chaotic style. He was frustrated, but he couldn't hate you. That had been extravagantly cool. “Damn,” he thought as he realized he had fallen into the same game you had King Sukuna entangled in. His cheeks flushed as he watched the girl who stole his heart ride through the air on a sublime curse.

“DAMN YOU, YOU CRAZY BITCH!” He exclaimed at the top of his lungs.

THE UPDATE DATE WILL BE SUNDAYS FROM NOW DUE TO PROOFREADING! THX :3

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Masterlist.

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Tag list: @bbnbhm @pxnellian @kbirdieee2540 @konigswifeyforlifey @kyo-kyo1 @calico-cheriies @imas1mpp @alone-the-honored-one @vlads-dracula3 @bigraga-sk @neeke-lilac02 @shaazd @airandyeah @energiepie @awkward-walking-potato @delightfully-studying @catobsessedlady @danniwerner @paradisestarfishh

(let me know if you want to be tagged in next chapters!)

[llendrinall]

How to kill a woman online all over again (How to recognize a smear campaign)

“It's actually sad because it just shows you have people who really want to hate on women” Melissa Nathan – Professional Online Assassin (PR Crisis Manager)

In December 2024 The New York Times published a story about a targeted campaign of harassment and character assassination against actress Blake Lively. I won't rehash the details of the case here. Be it enough to know that Lively suffered sexual harassment during the filming of It Ends With Us. Baldoni, the perpetrator, orchestrated a campaign against her to preemptively mar her character so that any allegations against him would be dismissed.

I won’t dwell on that here. Instead, having read a lot of what has been published, I want to describe how these public relations campaigns work.

The main idea is that the rich and powerful can and will hire people (Melissa Nathan being the most famous at the moment) to turn public opinion against their victims. This has two benefits for them:

Victims are less likely to speak up when they find themselves targets of attack.

Prosecutors, judges and jurors can be swayed by these campaigns.

Ultimately the idea is that only good, saintly, women are victims of abuse. If the woman is less than perfect then she is either lying or deserving of the abuse.

How do we recognize these campaigns? These are the traits I have noticed so far.

The target is a woman.

The attacks comes from within and without. So there will be “inside” stories as well as “public” stories.

Inside stories can be something like a “journalist” claiming something terrible happened behind the cameras, leaking videos out of context, etc.

Public stories are ideas supposedly noticed by the public. Someone commenting on the victim’s outfits, accessories or behaviors and extrapolating to their character. For example, if she uses a leather bag, she is supporting animal abuse, but if she uses a plastic bag, she is bad for the environment.

Of course, since people are far from perfect, some of these stories will point to actual bad behavior. That still is no justification for abuse.

3. The campaign is multi-platform.

Traditional media pick up the story. This doesn’t mean proper, trust-worthy media, but it’s important that some paper tabloid like, say, The Daily Mail will mention it.

Online media also pick up the story.

Social media pick up and spread the story through all platforms. This, to me, is the most tell-tale sign that something fishy is going on, when Reddit, Instagram reels, Tik-tok videos and Youtube short are all in agreement that this woman is nasty. Some posts will be bots, some created by actual humans working by the PR firm and many more made by users following the trend because as Nathan notices, people like to hate on women.

4. The story jumps the algorithm and now you are hearing about it.

Think of this: You enter Tik-tok and Instagram and stare at a short video of someone tying a knot. It’s a cool knot so you watch the video half a dozen times to learn how to do it. Next time you enter the site, your feed offers you nothing but knot-tying videos. That’s the algorithm working.

Now, when you are peacefully watching knot-tying videos and in pops a video of someone mocking the ridiculous way this woman drinks water, that’s a jump in the algorithm.

In other words, I can’t tell you any other films in which Blake Lively has starred, I have no interest in her whatsoever, and yet I got videos saying how horrible and tone-deaf she was during promotion.

If you are learning nasty things about a person even though you care nothing about them, their job or even their industry, then we should take pause. I’m not saying dismiss it, but ask yourself why are you seeing this.

5. There is a comparison with a man.

It’s not enough that the victim is a bad woman. She must be compared to a man, most likely her abuser, who is a much better person. He would never use a leather/plastic/cotton bag, don’t you know?

Examples:

Knowing how these campaigns work, it’s easier to notice their outline, their shape, under the waves of news and social media. Here are some examples.

The Fallen - Amber Heard vs Johnny Depp. This is the paradigm of online assassination. If you were online in the spring of 2022 it was impossible to avoid the hate against Heard who, I am sure, is a horrible person. Yet she was also abused by Depp. He lost a libel suit against a tabloid. You really have to be a nasty piece to lose a libel suit. Depp, by the way, also used Melissa Nathan as an online gun-for-hire.

The Ones Currently Fighting – Blake Lively against Justin Baldoni is the most recent one. Summer and Fall of 2024 was marked by the hate against her. Again, I am sure she is insufferable, entitled, blonde and all together quite impossible to describe. This doesn’t change the fact that Baldoni sexually harassed her. One should not have men ogling one’s naked body.

Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt. Did you know that Melissa Nathan not only represented Johnny Depp and Justin Baldoni, but also Brad Pitt? Did you know that once this fact was made public Pitt finally signed the divorced papers after eight (8!) years? Little is known of this story because Angelina Jolie has amazing intuition for public relations. She has been silent for almost a decade, while there are news about Pitt going out with his girlfriend, Pitt missing his children and Pitt being sad that his children are forsaking his last name.

(The report on the 2016 plane incident states that Pitt choked one of the children and hit another in the face. Can’t imagine why they would take the Jolie name after that).

(As an aside, I think there is a racist bias here at work and that people assume he hit the boys, not the girls, and the POC children, not the white ones, so “it’s not as bad”).

The One Success Story so I can finish this on a hopeful note – Sophie Turner and Joe Jonas. The moment the couple split, stories emerged of Sophie being a bad mother for, hear this, going to a wrap-up party, having a career in film instead of staying home and what not. This was in 2023, the sting of the Heard-Depp case was recent and Sophie Turner’s fans were not having it. I remember reading an editorial noting how the campaign had fizzled out and Jonas stop fighting for custody of their children.

Anyway:

Bad women can be victims of abuse.

No one deserves abuse.

If you ever think “why am I being showed this?” that’s an abuser killing his victim online all over again.

[nyoomfruits]

PLEASE ELLIE

du bist mein schultenbrau

Tell me!! 🤍😂

ITS SO DUMB ITS JUST THE WORKING TITLE for everyone super confused by the context, the title is from this banger of a dutch après ski hit the title has mostly nothing to do with the fic except lando and oscar go on a ski trip in the winter break because oscar was supposed to go with his gf but she broke up with him and lando's like 'i'll go with you' and they spend a whole week on a super romantic couples ski trip As Bros (who fall in love. obviously) anyway thats a terrible explanation here's the first two opening scenes that actually set up the plot perfectly lmao:

Max texts Lando on one of this last days in the MTC, right before winter break is supposed to start. Lando doesn’t even notice at first, spending most of his time in and out of meetings, filming a few last minute promo vids. When he does notice, he sighs, annoyed, a little disappointed.

“Hm?” Oscar says, from across the table, where he’s slouched down in one of the office chairs, scrolling through his own phone.

“Max cancelled our trip,” Lando says, dropping his phone down on his thigh and staring up at the ceiling as he contemplates his options. He could go visit his parents, maybe. Maybe other Max and Martijn wanted to hang out for a bit.

“Verstappen?” Oscar asks, without glancing up from his phone. He’s been quiet all day, more quiet than usual. There’s a downward pitch to his mouth, bags under his eyes. Lando gets it, maybe. It’s been a long season, and even though they ended on a high note, he can understand the exhaustion. He’s feeling it himself, the aftereffects of months of giving it his all. It’s why he’d been looking forward to this trip so much.

“Fewtrell. We were going to the Maldives. But now his girlfriend wants to go visit her family, so.” He tries not to sound bitter about it. He gets it. She hardly gets to see him as it is, and it’s not like Max owes him anything.

He’d just really been looking forward to it.

“Can you cancel?” Oscar asks. He’s put his phone down, and he’s looking at Lando now, the way he always does. Like there’s nothing else in the world more worth looking at than Lando. It had unnerved Lando a little, in the beginning, until he’d realized that’s just how Oscar looks at people. Or, well, he assumes that’s just how Oscar looks at people. He’s never really been able to test this theory, but it makes sense, so. It’s probably true.

“Yeah,” Lando says. “Full deposit back and everything. Still. Rather be on a beach.”

Oscar snorts. “Luckier than me, then.”

“Why?” Lando asks, frowning, wondering if he’s forgetting something.

“I was supposed to go to this ski resort with Lily. But now. Well.” He looks pained, and when Lando sends him a confused look, he adds. “We, uh. We broke up. So.”

“Ah,” Lando says. So maybe it hadn’t all been exhaustion, then. “I’m sorry.”

Oscar shrugs, but his mouth is still pitched down and he’s not looking at Lando, instead focusing on his hands, where he’s fiddling with his phone. “It’s okay. It just wasn’t working out anymore. For either of us. But uh. Yeah. Still sucks. Plus I can’t get my deposit back, so now I either go on this stupid ski trip alone, which is just sad, or I just lose the money.”

Technically, Oscar could probably afford to lose the money. He’s rich enough. But it’s the principal of the thing. Also, Oscar still has that sad puppy look on his face and it’s pulling at Lando’s heart a little bit. It’s the only excuse he has for blurting out. “I’ll go with you.”

“Oh,” Oscar says, looking up, surprised.

“Yeah,” Lando says, thinking about it a little more seriously. “Yeah, why not? Teammate bonding outside of the season. It’ll be good for us. Plus, it solves both of our problems. You don’t lose the money and you don’t look like a sad sack of shit in front of all those fancy ski people, and I get to go on a vacation after all. Win win.”

“I mean,” Oscar says, and he seems to actually consider it now. “It’s no beach.”

Lando shrugs. “Bet the gin and tonics still taste roughly the same,” he says, and Oscar laughs, one of those full body things where he folds in half with the force of it. The joke’s not that funny, but it’s the happiest he’s seen Oscar all day, so he’ll take it.

“Sure,” Oscar says. “Why not. Let’s go.”

--

It isn’t until Lando’s standing in the door opening of their little cabin for the weekend, backpack hanging off one shoulder and suitcase at his feet, that he realizes how intimate this is. He should’ve guessed, maybe. Oscar had said it was a trip he’d booked for him and his girlfriend, so. He doesn’t know what he was expecting, perse. But this is. It’s small. It’s cozy. There’s a fireplace.

“Lando, I don’t want to rush you, mate, but it’s like minus ten out here and I’m not wearing my ski jacket yet,” Oscar says, from somewhere behind him, a noticeable shiver in his voice.

“Right, yeah, sorry,” Lando says, moving further into the cabin, dragging his luggage with him. Lando had flown in from Monaco, fresh off celebrating New Year’s with his friends. Oscar had flown in from London, and Lando’s pretty sure he spend both Christmas and New Year’s alone. It shouldn’t tug at his heart strings as much as it does, probably.

Oscar makes his way inside, dumping his suitcase by the couch and looking around. “Quaint,” he settles on.

“All right, big fancy words man,” Lando says, rolling his eyes. “Please tell me you know how to make a fire, it’s fucking freezing in here.”

“I do, actually,” Oscar says, beelining for the fireplace while Lando wanders further into the cabin, darkly muttering ‘of course you do’.

The living room is massive, with a giant L shaped couch in front of the fireplace, and big open windows looking out over the beautiful snowy landscape outside. To the left, there’s an open archway to a kitchen and dining room, and to the right are two doors. One, upon opening it, turns out to lead to a pretty decently sized bathroom. The other-

“Oscar,” Lando says, frowning a little. “Are you aware there’s only one bed?”

“What?” Oscar says, looking up from where he’s fidgeting with something in the fireplace. Lando doesn’t say anything, just holds open the bedroom door and gestures at the frankly giant bed. “Oh, yeah,” he says, looking a little forlorn. “I mean. Yeah. When I booked it- Well. They didn’t have any cabins with single beds, so.” He shrugs a little bashfully. “I’ll uh, take the couch. It’s big enough.”

And he looks so small, and so sad, crouched in front of the fire, shoulders slightly hunched over, that tired, sad expression back on his face, and goddamnit. “Don’t be ridiculous,” Lando says, closing the door resolutely and going to grab his luggage. “We’ll share.”

“But-“ Oscar shares, and behind him, there seems to have appeared an actual fire in the fireplace. Lando raises an impressed eyebrow.

“No. We’ll share. It’s fine, the bed is giant. I think we’d be sleeping closer together if they had given us separate beds, that’s how big it is,” Lando says, grabbing his bags and making his way back to the bedroom.

“Okay,” Oscar says, but he doesn’t look so sad anymore, smiling a little at Lando’s dumb little joke, and that’s. Lando will take that, if anything.

“So,” Lando says, flopping down on the giant couch after he’s managed to ditch all of their luggage. “What’s the plan for tonight?”

[notexactlyrocketscience]

Love, Theoretically by Ali Hazelwood: a critically kind review from a femme acespec physicist <3

> scroll to the next section for my review on the physics academia content in this book!

First, a quick romance novel review!

spoiler: it wasn’t my favorite but I gave it a ⭐️⭐️⭐️.75 because being a writer has made me a generally more appreciative reader + I am so starved of woman in physics rep.

the good

It just felt good to read about a woman physicist, who are still incredibly underrepresented in fiction, especially as protagonists. (I’ll go off about that in a minute.)

The romance is so swoony with shoujo manga vibes, I haven’t read straight M/F adult romance novels in a while and I just loved the flutteriness of it.

A couple of chapters were so soft with excellent pillowtalk. There was something about the ambience of the snow, the hypnotic sadness of failure, the prescence of a comforting person.

I enjoyed identifying the relatable parts about physics academia. Hazelwood clearly did a lot of research, and I have to say I was pleasantly surprised. It definitely kept me reading!

the bad

The academia issues are so over-simplified it’s almost juvenile. For an adult novel, even one marketed as a romcom, I expect more nuance, more explanations, more explicit lingering in tight positions.

And then the romance tries to be complex (and has a lot of potential!) but not a lot of conflict really happens.

A fictional physics fued between theorists and experimentalists is a really fun (and actually not far off) concept, but I would have expected some things to be the other way around. (More on that later!)

Okay this is personal but the main couple both have terrible taste in movies. Twilight vs white male rage movies??? There is no lesser evil here

Elsie’s hardships aren’t put in a very serious light. Her diabetes and lack of access to health insurance is used as a plot device to engineer romantic momentum between the characters and/or comic relief.

Just overall, the book tried so hard to remain “light” that I think it fails to garner depth. Because adult lives really aren’t that light all the time, and a book can bring relaxation and joy whilst including real worldly negative experiences.

There were aroace and sapphic side characters, but I wanted so bad for Elsie to be demisexual. It's set up so perfectly only for it to be averted—As a demisexual person myself, Elsie’s feelings about attraction felt acutely familiar to me, and every other reader I've spoken to has agreed that the book took a dissapointing and unexpected turn. I understand Hazelwood may not feel equipped to write queer protagonists but if I were her editor, I would have flagged that and recommended she make it canon. It would have added so much more context and dimension to Elsie, and would’ve put hetero demisexuals on the map. </3

Following up on the above: The smut tries so hard to be meaningful but it ... really is icky, stereotypical, unrealistic allocishetero stuff. Think: the shy inexperienced girl vs the man who knows exactly how to advise her. The characters try to subvert the trope by calling it out, but it feels performative because all is forgotten in the next second. The PiV sex is weirdly conventionally idealistic considering the pairing’s size difference. I’m picky about smut but also forgiving when I do like the dynamic. I just didn’t here.

Following up once again: I was ready to ignore all the repetitive comments about how sexy Jack’s height and muscles were, because sure, I guess Elsie has a type. But the sex scenes solidified the redundancy of it all. I've read this same dynamic in countless smutty heteronormative M/F paperbacks. And I have also been made aware by every Hazelwood reader that all her books focus on this kind of physical build pairing. I just want more diversity, you know?

IDK, I just wanted more physics in here than complaining about teaching, glossed over toxic mentors, and using some quirky physics term in every other sentence. (More on that below!)

I just wanted ... more? It’s not an extremely short novel, but both the plot and the character development fell flat. The ups and downs were too fast and easy, and the placement felt off. I finished the book and wondered, “That’s it? That’s all that happened?” It just wasn’t fulfilling. The side characters aren't expanded upon, and don’t get enough pagetime. My other romance reads this year were Bellefleur's The Fiancee Farce and Mcquiston’s One Last Stop. In both of those novels, the drama was fleshed out with so much care and detail. In comparison, Love, Theoretically may mention similar social difficulties in passing, but failed to really, really show us.

Overall ... the novel was fun for being about physicists but I really don’t see myself picking up another Hazelwood book, especially considering this isn’t even a debut novel. The conventional white steminist vibe and the particular allocishetero M/F dynamic just isn’t my thing.

But perhaps a reader wanting more of a novel and its characters is a good problem to have. Never say never, I guess! I look forward to keeping tabs on what Hazelwood publishes in the future!

Now, onto the physics!

First, most physicists, as good scientists, understand that theory and experimentation are fundamentally linked. It’s true that we each are often biased towards our own methods of research, but it is quite a stretch to imagine full professors so blatantly feud against others solely because of theory vs experimentation. Regardless, I was happy to suspend my disbelief for the sake of the plot that was framed in a genre-specific, lighthearted, humorous way.

Secondly, both theory and experimentation have sources of funding that are motivated in different ways, and Hazelwood's decision to have the theorists struggle with funding cuts due to declining interest in pop culture/the general public is actually quite credible. Experimentation garners a lot more interest from the application and engineering end of society, parts that are easily fueled by capitalism.

However, I think experimentalists in general are far less likely to be mean to theorists than the reverse scenario. Dr Fatima Abdurrahman has a great video essay about that called on her YouTube channel called “Quantum Physics, Feminism, and Objective Reality: What Physicists Don’t Want You to Know About Quantum Mechanics.” Dr Fatima outlines how old white men in physics have maintained this image of unwavering scientific objectivity in the name of rigor, despite studying a field that fundamentally is barely fathomable for humans. In simpler terms: Men, even in theory, pretend to be better, smarter, and more valid as physicists despite being in an infamously iffy field. And I would have liked to see that represented. It was just really hard for me to buy narcissistic grad students mansplaining Elsie about her field, and Elsie’s righteous feminine rage, when the field in question is … physics theory? It just didn’t make sense to me, when all of my personal experiences point to the opposite.

But every cloud has a silver lining, and having a woman theorist in a physics field that’s less popsci-oriented is actually … really cool. And having her love interest be a man in experimentation … sort of subverts gender roles and conventional media expectations.

Let me explain. The reality is that when women are represented in STEM, media prefers to put them in biology, like a nurse to a doctor, a people-oriented nurturer, a mere sidekick to the real “objective” scientist—often a mathematician or an astrophysicist who is always a man. And when women are placed in physics, they are automatically assigned to observational astronomy, which is dismissed as passive and easy. (This is wildly untrue—though styles of research in astronomy has interestingly allowed a somewhat more diverse array of researchers in history. Even today, you’ll see a higher frequency of women and queer people in every astronomy department.)

I think my ideal version of this novel would be retaining Elsie in theory, while also making theorists the overall bad guys in the feud. I would love to have her talk about the unique sexism she faces as a theorist. I would kill for a scene in which Jack gets gobsmacked by how fucking good at math she really is, compared to him (instead of, like, only making fun of it like it’s easy). I would love to read about her getting a tour of his lab, and just more physics content. But maybe I’m the only one saying that, because I’m a physicist. Maybe Hazelwood simplified it all to keep the book appealing to the general masses.

Still, it all read more like a girlpower!!! chant rather than a real commitment to represent a woman in STEM. I savored every moment Elsie or George would go off about physics. I loved Elsie’s conversations with Olive, a different STEM academic. (Monica was more complicated and actually quite interesting, and I wish we could have seen more of her. Heck, I wish we had actually been given any tangible info about Jack’s mom, even.) But I genuinely felt these instances were rare. Elsie referred to being a physicist a lot (and frankly, her mind is more physics-y than any IRL physicist considering the sheer number of physics-inspired figures of speech she uses … but I excused that as silly comic relief, a quirk in Hazelwood’s writing style). But she didn’t tangibly do physics on page. It was disappointing, considering women characters in STEM is what Hazelwood is known for.

And there are physicists who love teaching—even physicists who solely want to teach. Physicists who do pedagogy research. I know the book was mainly trying to criticise the adjunctification and dismissal of physics higher education, and it’s actually quite accurate in representing that most physicists in academia would prefer not to teach. But the excecution also ends up erasing physicists who aren’t in academia just for research. And I say this especially because the validity of teaching physicists as physicists is dismissed in real life. It’s used as justification to further force all physics academics to try to juggle between both research and teaching, whether they want to or not.

Which leads us to bad mentors. I’ve had a bunch of those. As Olive pointed out in an excellent quote, “Academia is so hierarchical, you know? There are all these people who have power over you, who are supposed to guide you and help you become the best possible scientist, but . . . sometimes they don’t know what’s best. Sometimes they don’t care. Sometimes they have their own agenda. […] Sometimes they’re total shitbuckets who deserve to step on a pitchfork and die.” And the thing is, the novel really doesn’t show us any of that (perhaps other than in Monica). We don’t fully get to know what happened to Jack’s mom, or Olive. We are not shown what Dr L’s agenda really was. Their final confrontation was so quick, when in reality shitty mentors are often sticky and entwined with your work, hard to cut off and scarier to talk back to even after you’ve finally realized they’re toxic.

Which isn’t to say the novel is just inadequate about everything. It’s correct in how goofy physics faculty are, and how white man-dominated the field is, how students try to mansplain women profs, how theorists madly work on their computers (as an experimentalist, I could never understand), how publishing is finicky (to put it kindly), and how tenured faculty fail to understand the reality of the job market in academia today. There are certain parts (like the quote above!) where I felt incredibly seen as part of a minoritized identity group in STEM academia. It’s rare to have a book written from this PoV, and as a first I think this novel will always be special for me!

If you’re interested in reading about more fictional women physicists, I would highly recommend skimming through this list I made on GoodReads (and feel free to add more!).

And if you’d like to support memoirs and science communication books by IRL women physicists, then look to further than this other list I’ve also made. (We’re actually currently seeing a boom in these which is inanely exciting to me, so again, contributions are always welcome!)

[annabelle-creart]

There's more?

Much more YEY, more of the multiverse meeting because of bad weather :D

Part 1 Part 3

I did the 4 bots

Now let's make the human team (Greenes and villains not included because that's too damn much)

This time there was lighthing, but nothing came, at least at view, but from the sky and in a robotic suit, the old man, blinded by a curse, started his new plan to go back home

The name? Police Chief Charlie Burns...

And yes, this is the Charlie Burns from @gelu-the-babosa-multiversal 's miraculous ladybug au, why? Because I thought it would be funny to have a corrupt mecha police officer and the Akumatized Jhon Wick x Robocop son in the same room (joke)

Charlie, blinded by Hawk Moth's moth, became a suit of armor full of the best tech with the only objetive of make his island and family safe, but well, things happens, and he became kind of... cuckoo

Also, ref post because I know mine is not enough and I think this is really good, despite I’m not a miraculous fan

Despite the lighthing stroke at the founder's statue, everybody were at their homes to notice, except by someone, who deep in the caverns and old tunnels, explored for a way out, finding a large and tall hallway full of strange tech and almost unuseful but fascinating, but what he was about to see wouldn't be fascinating

Now the young Kade Burns was about to see what could have been

Why this Kade waked up on the tunnels and was about what could have been? Because the Heatwave he knew was the mere person who made part of the more terrible times for humans

You’ll see: this Kade Burns is a rescuer, yes, one who comes from an island in the middle of nowhere, he never met the outside world and does not have interest on it, nonetheless, despite he can consider the Heatwave of his universe a friend, he’s still conflicted about Heatwave, because this Kade comes from the universe (that is one of my faves) that I call: Hunters of the Cosmos, an au that works as what if Onyx and Quintus were the only survivors of the war against Unicron, making Predacons the only existing race and by defect, changing the curse of history. In this au, Predacons conquered Earth because Cybertron wasn’t inhabitable anymore, after many years of being only legends, they killed humans on the try and made the place their home. Now, Kade’s shenanigan will be the fact that his universe was brought as that in pain and suffering, when in this one, cybertronians almost came peacefully, it was a shock for Kade how different everything could have been. Also the fact this Kade is more responsible and serious than normal Kade, which for normal Kade is interesting but kind of boring (I LOST THE FUCKING POST THAT TALKED ABOUT THE AU)

With the sound of thunder that fell on a tree, and same with the architect, the sky only seemed to get worse and worse, he didn’t had another but to found refuge as far as possible from the forest, yes, this was strange, but he didn’t have time to think of why he was on another side of the island he got off time ago, not if he wanted to evade the storm

With that, Graham ran with all he could

Despite it sounds normal, it isn’t, this is the Graham from @oldeubagel ‘s shattered glass universe (and theres a lot of TRFB SG universes because Hasbro never gave us one)

The reference post is this one but in context and in short, Graham’s life was mostly sad and miserable, studying hard only to get out of the island as possible evading his shitty family and yes, he became rich really fast (and also drug addicted but those are details), one of the things it would be funny to explore is his relationship with the Kade from Hunters of the Cosmos and the normal Kade, most like a reconciliation that he will never had with his own brother, mostly because these Kades actually care and would never call him a traitor for leaving :v, and also mirrorshiping sound funny (I completely let all the fault on you Bagel, those draws were too good to ignore (and Graham in green looks great))

Despite thinking her end was near, it wasn’t, the only thing that disturbed her was the light and the terrible sound, it felt like if she just was throw out of the lightning itself and this storm was everything but normal, she knew these type of storms, they were usual all the time at home, she just never thought one of the lightning would reach for her, right now, Dani, flying as fast as her tiny wings let her through some drops of water on the storm, needed answers, and a place to stay the night

HAHA, we needed more fantasy Au’s, now, people, Dani, but on fairy :D, she’s not normal and almost watchable, tiny and fast (too much), at home she’s a wind fairy, and also a good racer, maybe the best athlete of all never land

And yes, those storms are normal for her, where she lives is a valley full of magic, magic that sometimes can get angry and out of control, her brother Graham knows more about it, but basically, the lightnings were so full of magic that everything was possible, even sending someone to another universe, or even changing of universe…

The kid was alone, not the first time and he wasn’t surprised, things got out of hands since he discovered he was a prime, but this was definitely the most weirdest thing possible he could ever live know, Griffin Rock was the same, but the kid he had in front was equal to him, the same, like a mirror

Cody knew something wasn’t right, well, nothing was right, he just thought he could help the people trapped in the storm… but now the trapped one was he

Cody Prime by Gelu The Babossa on your service! The kid wanted to be savior boy again but as always, ended up wrong :v, for ref story just write in Gelu’s profile: Cody is Onyx Prime’s reincarnation, and you will find everything in seconds ;)

I know this was mostly au’s from someone else but I don’t have enough au’s or ideas AND these au’s are too damn interesting to not to pay them attention

Just for your knowledge, Chase and Graham are not from the same shattered glass au, SG!Chase is mine and SG!Graham is Bagel’s

And yes, there will be more :)

But for now, bye :D

[thyladyofathousand-n-onehobbies]

I’m continuously relistening to The Ithaca Saga and oh my god?? I just keep noticing new old motifs/themes/tunes/whatever reappearing now and again??

Like

The suitors going “Time is fleeting, it’s running out. Time to be the man of the house” as a call back to Man of the House

The suitors doing the background “Penelope, Penelope” is both great and terrible. Terrible because intentions, right? Because for the entire musical that’s only been used in the context of Odysseus trying to get back to his wife, and now these bastards use it?? But it’s also great because this is the theme that’s been used for Penelope since the beginning and it hits because we finally met Penelope! She’s not just the wife Odysseus is trying to get back to, she’s this character with her own songs and struggles and-

“Waiting, waiting~” is kinda in the same place any Open Arms reference, where it just. Hurts. Also Open Arms reference slipped in Odysseus (which apparently used to be named King? But I like the name change because now Odysseus is being introduced like a monster. Like Polyphemus, and Scylla, and Charybdis), both makes me cackle and deeply sad. Cus on the one hand. Damn. He’s truly let go of that mentality. He’s truly changed. We begin with him giving mercy as the default(? I don’t know how else to word it) to actively deny it when begged. But also. It’s the suitors. I want to see them get wrecked worse than the sirens or Poseidon were

Also in Hold them down, they bring back that “Where is he, where is the man who-“ that I think is technically from Man of the House, but is also referencing Legendary

Now. Odysseus (formerly King).

It might just be me, but the opening line sounds so much like Man of the House, while the opening (riff? Sound? Whatever) sounds like The Horse and The Infant

The chorus chanting “Ody-sseus” is giving god entrance, like tell me that’s not how Poseidon was introduced in Ruthlessness

The “Keep your head down he’s for the torches” has a very similar sound as Keep Your Friends Close. Might just be me. Might just be coincidence.

Telemachus’ intro/instrumental break!! There’s so many motifs or whatever (quick thought, Legendary, from what I can tell) packed in there but!! It sounds so good I just want to loop a ten hour long recording of just that!!

The “hold him down! Hold him down!” Also sounds super good, and like. Frantic? Almost. It might just be me projecting, but it kinda feels like the suitors singing it are either mentally going “fucking he’ll do it we need some type of advantage” or “we’re so dead. We’re even more dead now that we’re going after his son, instead of just plotting”

Also that fucking groWl (you know the one) just. Holy shit

(We’re skipping I Can’t Help But Wonder)

The Ruthlessness theme when he’s recounting what he’s done

When he’s talking about the bed, and how he’d have to cut the roots, it almost sounds like the beginning of Six Hundred Strike, the “you don’t seem to get it, I can’t afford to die. Because I will get back to my son, and I will get back to my wife”

The instrumental of Just A Man shows up at the end of Would You Fall In Love With Me Again

I love this musical so so much

[taylor-swift-fosters-it-again]

ok guys I’m reading through the middle school out of context document and I’m laughing so hard so here you go: my middle school as kotlc (below the cut bc this will be long)

“THIS IS THE MOST PATRIOTIC STANDARD PENCIL IN ALL OF SCHOOLDOM!” - sophie

“that’s, like, the definition of insanity.” - biana

“go to florida!” - sophie

“dead students are a lot of paperwork.” - mr. forkle

“I feel that was a white person hand!” - wylie

“WE HAVE THE COWS!” - keefe

“what up, my fellow mathematicians?” - fitz

“we’re only, like, half dead.” - ro

“what am I supposed to think? ‘oh, these are pretty shoes!’ and then you look at your shoes and then you trip and fall. and then you remember to run. and then you think, ‘run? where have I heard that word before?’” - sophie

“do you see my grandma working at mcdonalds? well, no, you don’t, because she’s dead. but do you?” - sophie

“guys! stop hating yourself! only I can do that!” - keefe

“I think I’ve avoided death plenty of times already.” - sophie

“we’re going to florida to be in the hurricane so we can get the full experience.” - linh

“terrible minds think alike.” - tam

“so, we put the gum on the wax paper. do we chew the wax paper??” - keefe

“who else is crippled??” - fitz

“yo, can I show y’all my sticky note collection now??” - dex

“I shall find them and have batman justice!!” - keefe

“nowadays, it’s just sad.” - sophie

“you’re going to be stuck with me for four miles!” - keefe

“guys, I actually didn’t flood anything this time!” - linh

“just because he’s russian doesn’t mean we can’t play his music!” - fitz

“what am I, boiled trash?” - dex

“that’s not necessarily injust!” - mr. forkle

“bro, why are you hiding bodies in your locker?” - keefe

“coming soon to a parliament near you.” - sophie

“my hair’s inside my hair tie and it’s my hair tie. who would’ve thought?” - biana

“yeah, I get scared really easily. who’s the scariest guy?” - keefe

“don’t laugh at my violin playing.” - dex

��it’s like a high school dance party, except they’re doing mountain climbers in the dark.” - sophie

“acorns?” “acorns?” “acorns?” “no, chestnuts.” - keefe, fitz, dex, and keefe again

“it’s time to go scissor shopping!” - tam

“just ask them for money.” - fitz

“you just have to give up on logic.” - sophie

“I’m smart. who wants to play google snake with me?” - dex

“bro, stop using the metric system!” - fitz

“girl, don’t dance with a knife!” - biana

“I don’t get it, but otherwise I could.” - keefe

“you still have to share a stand with this ugly mug.” - biana

“I’ve had a change of heart.” - dex

“why are you standing behind a pole? your wallpaper looks like something that would be in a horror movie. are all of your friends like this, or just you?” - grady

“I was watching the clouds for THREE HOURS. it brings a whole new definition to ‘boring’.” - sophie

“suck it france. you and your baguettes.” - dex

“we just have issues.” - fitz

“I STRONGLY dislike middle parts... okay?” - biana

“then, I teabag ’em” - keefe

“I came from my mom. I don’t know what you all are talking about.” - marella

“you’re going to steal my foot???” - fitz

“when I have my leather jacket on, you know I’m gonna be serious about this.” - tam

“is it true that you’re skipping right to college?” - dex

“yeah, it’s a big bird but so are ostriches” - sophie

“I’m sorry I threw an orange at you.” - fitz

“GUYS LA CARA HAS TWO R’S! CARA WITH TWO R’S!” “bro, why did you write it with two r’s?” “he said it has two!” “IT DOES! *whispers* I’m tricking them.” “OH HOW DEVIOUS!” - dex, fitz, keefe, dex again, and keefe again

“like, someone needs to calm down. and it’s not me!” - sophie

“SWEATSHIRTS ARE FOR THE WEAK!” - keefe

“you talk a lot. perhaps it’s time to rest your voice!” - tam

“LET’S BE PLANETS. I will be uranus.” “I’m jupiter, baby! actually, I will be the sun.” “no! I am the sun because I light up the world.” “actually, I will be a black hole.” “yes, that suits you because YOU SUCKED UP MY DREAMS” “LET’S BE STAR WARS CHARACTERS” - dex, keefe, fitz, keefe, fitz, dex

“history will be like, yeah, it was a steal!” - sophie

“EXPOSED!!” - dex

“label everything, cause, why not?” - linh

“this would’ve cost us, but it would’ve cost us in humans.” - sophie

[curiositymemes]

MISTER MAGIC SENTENCE STARTERS : PART TWO.

taken from the 2023 novel by kiersten white. trigger warnings for unreality, trauma, religion, and cults. feel free to change wording and pronouns and provide context as necessary. do not add to this list.

“what do we say about crying?”

“you had a lot of nightmares.”

“at least i don’t snore?”

“i wouldn’t mess with her / him / them.”

“that was really kind. thank you.”

“it’s just what i was supposed to do all along.”

“why do you have it?”

“don’t you remember— no, i guess you don’t.”

“please take this as kindly as possible, but what the hell does that mean?”

“i forgot what a dork you can be.”

“only you could make me do this. you’re as pushy as ever.”

“is this what prom was like?”

“i hate missing free food.”

“we just have to wait a little longer. you’ll see.”

“we could go be beautiful somewhere else, instead.”

“or your ass is mine.”

“what is she / is he / are they doing here? i can’t deal with her / him / them, not right now. not ever.” 

“you know how important tonight is to me.” 

“i’ve worked a long time for this.”

“take me with you. i can’t do this alone.”

“wasn’t it the best?”

“i’ve lived here my whole life.”

“angels were everywhere, if you knew how to recognize them. if you knew how to make a deal.”

“suffer the children, you know.”

“not everything needs a reboot.”

“go home and cry joylessly into your still-in-the-box transformers.” 

“someone’s got to compensate for my terrible influence in his life / her life / your life / their lives.”

“lol delaware isn’t a real place.”

“what is all this talk of killing and death?”

“you’re here now, and you’re going to fix it. you’re going to make it right. you owe us that much, don’t you?”

“i don’t like to think about what happened; the pieces don’t make sense.”

“guess i was wrong about not needing to sneak in our own booze. luckily, i’m always prepared.”

“please don’t tease me.” / “i would never.” 

“everyone will stare.” / “they’re all staring anyway.”

“you! you broke everything!”

“what was that?”

“we won’t let them / him / her do this to you.”

“whatever else she is / he is / they are, name’s a loyal friend.”

“you need this. don’t let them know you have it.”

“you deserve— you all deserve to know.”

“can we get out of here?”

“come on. we’re going to make a bonfire.”

“i woke up in the middle of the night and it was glowing.”

“how do you know how to do this?”

“i can build a fire, administer basic first aid, and bullshit my way into making older people think i’m trustworthy.”

“he / she / they / you didn’t protect me from that.” 

“i’ve never not been a mom / dad / parent.”

“that’s the only time i ever got to be a kid.”

“don’t be a little shit.”

“you never forget the lesson that they would rather destroy you than let you inconvenience them.”

“it’s hard, and you’re doing it anyway.”

“fucktrumpet! shitgibbon! cockwomble!”

“be serious for once!”

“i need to know what happened to her / him / them / you / us.”

“anyone who was looking for you, anyone who took the trouble to find you: they’re not your friend.”

“you have to get out of there. now.”

“you can’t get better until you’ve hit rock bottom. you know that.”

“what if forgetting is a gift?” 

“i wish i could forget it.” 

“we missed you, name.”

“you didn’t give up, even when it got hard and a little scary. sometimes things are a little hard and scary. that’s when we need each other the most.”

“i am losing my mind.”

“i missed you the most.”

“i want it back.”

“i can’t force you to do it. but i need you to do this for me. for us.” 

“weird vibe in here, you guys.”

“please, come with me. nothing here is good for you.”

“i know that sounds sad but it wasn’t.”

“don’t look at me like i’m the one who’s being a bitch.” 

“what the hell? how is that possible?”

“tell me whether i saw what i think i saw.”

“how long have you been down here?”

“we don’t say that.” / “why not? they’re just words.”

“so really, all words are magic. something from nothing.”

“you were always good at words, weren’t you? good at making the others do what you wanted.”

“i’m tired of talking.”

“nothing is more powerful than imagination.”

“we all chose what to remember. or what to forget.”

“maybe it’s a deepfake.”

“fuck me. fuck me, fuck me. fuck all of us.”

“i’m sorry. i’m really, really sorry. i didn’t know.”

“i’ll see what they want.”

“name. fuckface. fuckface junior.”

“dunno what i did, dunno how to fix it, don’t really care.” 

“i’m going with you. we do this together.”

“you all realize this is insane, right? this is how we die.”

“at least i’ll go out doing what i love: being an absolute fuckwit making the worst possible choice.” / “no. being an absolute fuckwit making the worst possible choice in the best possible company.”

“is that how it was always supposed to feel?”

“i’m ready to break things.”

“i never would have left you.”

“i won’t let anything happen to you.”

“give me my fucking friends back.”

“tell me how to get you out of here. tell me how to fix it.”

“i believe in you. you protected us all back then, when we didn’t even know you were doing it. let us help you now.”

“we have to buy her / him / them / you time.”

“we should do what we do best.”

“it’s all still here.”

“let’s summon a demon!”

“this is so trippy! and stupid. i think it’s mold.”

“it’s not better in here, name. i know it feels like it could be, but it’s not. it never was.”

“you haven’t forgotten who you were, but you’re even better at it.”

“name is fucking with people who don’t have his / her / their best interests at heart.”

“that’s gotta be driving them insane to watch.”

“i’m nothing without it. i’ve never been anything without it.”

“you’ve always been enough by yourself. no one has ever been as loyal and smart and funny and fierce and deeply, deeply annoying as you.”

“i want to be a person. whole. happy with just myself. but how do we do that?” / “therapy.”

“in today’s session, i’d like to revisit the period of your childhood that was controlled by a minor deity in a pocket universe.”

“you’re all so stupid.”

“i love you, and i’m so proud of you.”

“you came back for us after all, name. i always knew you would.” / “really?” / “no. but i love being wrong. i’m really good at it.”

“he’s / she’s / they’re gone. you’ve always been good enough. you can do this alone.”

“i would have loved you so well.”

“you stayed.” / “i stayed.”

“go on. i believe in you.”

“you know what that’s like, if you let yourself remember.” 

“it’s not perfect, but it doesn’t need to be.”

[rei-does-stuff]

watched anymore episodes of the dub?

Yup! 4 eps! So this’ll be long!

SaH dub

Ep 7

-Bad voice acting strikes again!! They just can’t get it right

-They made Goseum a girl, #feminism???

-Please…Please stop using the same track over and over again I KNOW YOU HAVE DIFFERENT MUSIC PLEASE USE IT

-Drowing your enemies! You know, for kids!!!

-AGAIN WHY ARENT THEY CENSORING GEUM STABBING A GUY???

-They made Geum straight </3 this is so sad

-They talk about freedom so much…You are not the wolves Geum, you are no freedom loving American!!

-Also…Giving Geum a backstory of “oh I enrolled in the military with her blah blah blah” feels weird, ig just cuz im used to his regular backstory

-Everytime I hear Mul’s voice in this I wanna kill myself it’s so fucking irritating like HOW DO YOU MAKE IT THAT BAD??

-“You kidnapped me for no good reason!” Like theres a GOOD reason to kidnap someone???

-Geum is a TERRIBLE liar in this, how the hell is he staying undercover??

-Goseum being a badass girlboss is pretty cool tho ngl

-Even here Jogjebi is like “Geum is my bestie he would never hurt meee”

-Goseum is only good voice actor in this whole show

-“I wanna shoot something!” Lmao

-“What is he talking abt” EVEN THEYRE CONFUSED

-THEY TOOK THE HOMOEROTICISM OUT OF THE GOSEUM-GEUM BOUQUET SCENE I HATE THIS

-AGAIN WITH THEY JUST CUT TO THE CREDITS??

-Also I’m rewatching some of these in 2x speed and it’s…Very Very funny but it also makes me see how slow paced the dub makes everything feel, in the original the slow pace works but the dub just fucks it up in a way that I can’t really describe

Ep 8

-“My boy!” They are so father-soncore

-Again the untranslated Korean, 4kids was able to at least remove Japanese text why can’t you?

-This is NOT a battle of wills everyone here is dumb as rocks

-Geum im so sorry they dont know your character like I do </3

-I do like aekkus voice in this ngl…

-Mul is ALWAYS having a bad day NO MATTER WHAT!!

-“I promise well stop acting stupid”

They are all so brothercore in this too I do like it ngl

-“Well if you say so” THAT QUICKLY??

-The way they cut to the next scene is insane…

-The quality shifts is insane

-END AT AN APPROPRIATE TIME FOR ONCE

Ep 9

-Oh god the Goseumdochi death ep…

-Rodia’s voice is different AND bad wtf…Why did they ruin the only good voice actor

-Beautiful sound effects…Don’t you just love the horrible mixing of everything?

-“Oh no, its broken” you sound SO devastated Rodia

-Dan green once again explains what’s happening on screen

-They removed a lot of context for this too

-NO SONG EITHER :(

-“Without weaponry” EXCUSE ME??? HAVE YOU MET GOSEUMDOCHI??

-“Fight for freedom” things Geum would never say

-Again with the quality shifts…

-“You talking to me little rat??” iconic

-Terror? He’s barely done shit!!

Ep 10

-JOEY WHEELER?? FROM YUGIOH???

-JUL! Time for the “were brothers!” Censorship!

-His voice….I dont like it….

-NOT THIS MUSIC—

-Not the running sounds 😭

-Bad video quality strikes again

-Again no translation of korean text

-Not the yellow filter coming back with a vengeance 😭

-Now daramis a girl??? Transgenderism…omg

Overall they suck, had some funny moments tho so ykyk, rlly recommend watching it on 2x speed makes it WAY more tolerable

[the-californicationist]

For the ask game, if you’re willing: ❤️ and 💛

No pressure though. Love your work!

That makes me so happy. I really appreciate that, friend. Also! Thank you so much for this ask!! 🩷

❤️ — I think the line that I wrote that sticks in my head the most is from Gunslinger, which doesn’t make much sense out of context but alas:

“Let him eat your bones right up, your faithful coyote, all the brokenness within you.”

However, I am most proud of the writing that I was able to accomplish in The Devil’s Summer. It’s a hard fic to read, though. Dark stuff.

💛 — The most impactful lesson I’ve learned from this process is that you should never rush to the good part.

I have written over 95 fanfiction stories in the past year, I have 525k words inked down, and I’m sure there’s a few tumblr drabbles that I can stack on top of the pile as well. Throughout all of them, I have a terrible habit of sprinting to the part that I want to read. I’ll have it written a hundred different ways, imagined it a thousand times in my mind. Whatever it is — the big fight scene, the first kiss, the earth-shattering confessional — whatever the good part is, I hurry towards it, hungry like I’ll starve without it. But, the rush takes the glory from it. Details add to the taste, like spices to a meal, and without them, I feel like some of my big moments fall flat.

I hate slow burns. I hate writing them. I hate reading them. And yet, I’m starting to realize that I just hate waiting to see if the good part will come true.

A good slow burn, with a talented author, will drop little crumbs, small promises, letting you know what’s coming. She’ll whisper between the lines, “I know what you want. It’s here. Just wait!” And I find myself trusting those stories. Banking on them. And then realizing that the good part was only good because I consumed all of the other bites around it. If the main meal is always dessert, who wants more cake?

And I think, through this realization, I have also learned to be more patient with myself. If you knew me back in October 2023, I was churning out 150k words per month. I thought I had to hurry. I thought no one wanted to wait for me. I wasn’t worth waiting for.

But that has changed for me. I don’t run myself ragged anymore because I think I’m worth waiting for. I think my work is worth my own patience. And when I do deliver a post or a chapter or whatever, I think it shows that it was built and crafted with care, spiced and salted and grilled to be at its best.

And it has taught me just how much more learning I have to do. That desire to rush, to skip, to only eat (or read) the dessert is still there. It still taunts me. I can still hear myself in my mind saying, “Why would anyone wait on this when they can pull up tumblr or AO3 and get something else right now?” And teaching myself to ignore that negativity, to power through with my details, to trust my gut and write about all of the intricacies that I think are important; I have learned to try to listen to that part of myself. It’s becoming easier to do so.

When people bemoan George R. R. Martin for taking “too long”, I think that if people feel that way about a world class author, surely they must also feel that way about the fanwork they read. Hell, people have even stolen fanwork to feed AI machines just because they “want an ending”. And I thought that was the norm, but now I just feel sorry for those people. They can’t understand how much sweeter the treat would be if they had just been willing to wait for the work to be done in the way it was meant to be done. I feel sad for them that they will never realize the potential for what was unfinished.

I used to only read completed fics. I didn’t want to wait. I needed to know how it ends. Does the hero survive the evil? Do the lovers tell each other the truth? Does he actually fuck her in that one bed they have to share!? But not anymore. Now, I taste the little clues the author leaves behind for me. I listen to her voice as I read: “Trust me!” And so I do. I don’t mind waiting for the good part anymore. I subscribe, I bookmark, and I comment to tell them how much I am enjoying being fed.

As a writer, I need to get better at that patience. On waiting for the good part to come. It’s not always easy, but it’s been a good lesson.

[frostyyyroyalmilktea]

Why Vesna’s “My sister’s crown” in no feminist anthem but a Trojan horse filled with pro-russian messaging

My thoughts as a Ukrainian with a poli-sci degree.

I was debating whether to write this post but as the discourse around this song grows, I want to give people from other countries some context on the messaging used in the song and why Ukrainians are grossed out by it.

While I was writing it this post grew a mind of its own and I even ended up adding pictures so I'll fold the post here in case you don't care and just want to scroll through quickly.

First of all, it’s worth mentioning that this song attracted so much attention from Ukrainians because they use UKRAINIAN LANGUAGE in the chorus. It’s an important detail seeing how one of the singers is russian. A lot of Ukrainians share the opinion that letting a russian woman sing in our language is a completely vile thing to do to our culture. I agree with it too. But the abuse of our culture doesn’t stop there.

See this shot? This is supposed to be Borsch, a traditional Ukrainian dish. It’s worth mentioning that russia tried to appropriate this dish and in 2022 we fought tooth and nail to have UNESCO protect it as part of Ukrainian heritage. But back to the shot. The letters around it are supposed to symbolize russian propaganda. Great start🙄

But it gets better, lads. They start “feeding the propaganda” to the girl that —judging by stylistic choices as well as matryoshka makeup—  is supposed to represent russian people.

Right, so they *checks notes* use Ukrainian cultural dish —that russians almost succeeded in stealing from us— to show… what exactly? “Poor russians🥺 uwu” getting brainwashed? Oh, then let me grab my handkerchief. This is so so sad I think I’m about to cry😶😶😶

I mean, just a thought but if they wanted to show how shitty russian government treats its people, they could’ve recreated the historically accurate moment when russian tzar Ivan the Terrible shoved his underling’s face into a boiling soup. What does Ukraine and our long-suffering dish has to do with all this bs???

Now let’s talk about that “Crown”, that is supposed to belong to the sister (aka Ukraine). To me, as a poli-sci major, this is so stupid I don’t even know whether to laugh or cry. From the words of the band themself, where they explain —quite poorly might I say— the meaning of their song, we learn that “Crown” symbolizes the sovereignty of the 13 Eastern-European countries. Sounds perfectly valid. Here's a few random countries that I can remember from the top of my head in no particular order that have crowns in their symbols:

Coat of arms of the Czech Republic, Coat of arms of Serbia, Flag of Poland and Flag of Croatia

I actually decided that I don't want to have russian flag and emblem in this post because I don't want to look at it every time I scroll through, but you can go google it if you want, they have not one but two crowns on their emblem actually.

So what am I leading up to with all this flag-talk, you might ask. Well, the kicker is that THIS ⬇️ is Ukrainian emblem:

Not a crown in sight as you can see. I guess as a nation that was constantly fighting against imperial colonisation we’re not very fond of those. Who could’ve guessed🤷‍♀️

But the aforementioned two points are pretty circumstantial and in the grand scheme of things are not particularly significant. I felt compelled to point them out first to give people from other countries a bit of insight into the music video's visual. You are free to disagree with me on those. The main problem that triggers the majority of Ukrainians is the use of the word "sister". Listen, I know you don’t want to read a lecture on the nuance of Slav politics and I don’t really want to write it, I know you know how to google. So here’s the gist:

One of the BIGGEST narratives that russia is pushing in its export propaganda (aside from their go-to claim that all ukrainians are nazis) is that Slavs are all a family. Talk about shitty relatives, eh? But basically, it’s a lingering thing from USSR where russia exploited a bunch of neighboring countries and called this shit a “Union” (while convincing the rest of the world that those countries entered that union willingly and not under threats —or as a result of— hostile invasions, but I digress). So the way russia frames it is that russia is this big brother that "takes care of other little siblings”. Even writing it down made me want to barf🤢🤢🤢. This narrative was specifically very actively weaponized against Ukraine before the 2022 invasion. Its goal is to infantilize Ukraine as if we're not a whole-ass independent country, but a little sibling that doesn't know how to wipe their own ass. And that we just need good ol’ russia to come and save us from our own stupidity. I hope I shed some light on why this word specifically triggers us so much and why I think that this song has 0 to do with solidarity and overall is complete populistic bs with a generous dash of russian propaganda.

I want to emphasize that I didn’t make this post to fight or argue with anyone  but to give people another perspective if you’re interested in it from my pov as a Ukrainian. If you have other takes on it, I’d love to read them in the comments. Just please be respectful or I won’t interact.

This is all I have to say for today. Love, love, peace, peace, my dudes.

[sophieswundergarten]

@nobodysdaydreams GET OVER HERE AND ANSWER FOR YOUR CRIMES

The lyrics filled me with such a sense of impending doom asdfjdsfj

Poor Nerissa. She’s trying so hard and she’s doing so much worse than Nathaniel

SQ choosing not to eat all of the food is such a small defiance, but such a great one. It’s a really clever way to show how he feels about the situation

And, of course, the terrible singing and dancing is what convinces SQ. I want to see all of the Benedict siblings dance now

I love that “She borrowed the identity of an old artist friend she hadn’t seen or spoken to in years and used her psychic powers to convince the hiring committee at a major university to let her teach an art history class and make the class a mandatory requirement for all incoming art majors and have it fulfill the school’s general education fine arts requirement (just in case her nephew decided to change majors)” is a single sentence. It just adds to the single-breath, maniacal rambling feel of Nerissa’s inner monologue

Devin /derogatory

Oh, Nerissa. You can’t just tell people everything they do is perfect. That’s not how a relationship grows, or even functions. The lack of self-awareness in her perspective is both gorgeously written and utterly heartbreaking. She probably hasn’t had a single person in her life to learn healthy coping mechanisms or relationships from. I never thought you’d show us someone who was worse than Natheniel, but she’s giving him a run for his money

I still can’t get over how you keep throwing in references to “the magic of ABBA”, it makes me stop and laugh every time. Dangit, Bods, I’m trying to be serious! /lh

““That was acting, dear, it’s not the same as lying,” Nerissa informed him calmly”

NERISSA

SOMEONE HELP THIS WOMAN PLEASE TAKE HER TO THERAPY A COUNSELLOR JUST EVEN A REGULAR OLD PERSON SHE CAN TALK TO AND LEARN MORALS FROM

Oh, I just want to give her the biggest hug, even though she’d probably hate it and zap me with her psychic powers

Nerissa is just as scared as Nathaniel, probably more so because she has a somewhat(?) concrete concept of the Bad Thing she’s scared of in a way he doesn’t

I wish she didn’t have to be so afraid, it makes me so sad…

SHE’S SO SHOCKED. SHE REALLY DOESN’T UNDERSTAND WHAT’S GOING ON AND WHY SQ’S UPSET. GRRRRRRRR I WISH I COULD MAGICALLY BE A PART OF THE STORY AND MEDIATE FOR THEM

Violet mention!!! Violet mention!!!

I appreciate the phrasing of “they catered to (for lack of a better or more appropriate terminology in SQ’s vocabulary and experience) “addicts and crazy people””

Now, I have to admit, I was completely blindsided by the Psychic SQ bit. I don’t know how I missed it, but I about exploded when I reached this part

I’m getting really concerned about this… “facility” and how it operated

These voices are so scary, I can see how she’s overwhelmed and confused. That would petrify me

See, you keep having Nerissa do these crazy things that are hurting other people but then she just feels like a scared child who’s lashing out irrationally because there’s no one there to help her. I’m not saying I’m upset; it’s phenomenal writing. It just makes me sad

And of course, SQ has a completely different context for what’s going on

He’s just feeling completely betrayed by, like, every adult ever

Poor kiddo

“He supposed his inability to stop caring was always going to be his most troublesome quality”

SCREAMING CRYING WAILING

Your carpet tacks are MINE

I have SO MANY questions about why the code was 1-2-3-4. Was she oversimplifying it because she figured everyone else would overthink it? Was she trying to teach SQ how to use his intuition to guess something easy? Did she forget to change the default when she bought it from her evil lockmaker? SO MANY QUESTIONS

I feel like maybe the buzzing was supposed to protect SQ from whatever Nerissa had going on? I’m not sure, but I’m very curious

And he’s scared! Of course he’s scared, but he doesn’t have anyone to help or comfort him. And he’s still just a kid :( 

“No…this had to be some sort of mistake…this…this couldn’t be because of her!”

I am thinking there is something else going on here. I don’t know what, you probably have the proper psychology words for it, Bods, but there’s a distinct reason she’s reacting this way. Maybe denial? Like, grief?

Secret doors! They all have a thing about hidden passageways, don’t they?

WHOO

Time for the next chapter, which I have not read yet!! I’m really excited

Like. You would not BELIEVE how much I have been looking forward to this

How long have they been playing to have completed one hundred and eighty-four games of chess? Is Crawlings just really, really bad at chess?

Oh no. I remember the meme about this. How could you use the white knight lesson with the Ten Men???? GAH! Jail, jail for Bods for one thousand years!!! /j

I actually made the stupidest little laugh sound when I read Sharpe implying that Crawlings has an imaginary girlfriend. That’s such goofy, juvenile humour. What are they doing ajsdgjhsd?

I guess if all their games are that fast I could see how they’ve played that many already

WAIT. WAIT, DID KATE’S MOM USED TO BE AN AGENT TOO?? BODS GET BACK HERE I DEMAND ANSWERS

““To meet a higher caliber of women?” suggested Sharpe, looking up at the screen at Dipika”

Actually, kind of funny. Still want to punch him, though

BITING BITING BITING

I HAVE NO NOTES

I AM OUT OF NOTES

I AM JUST FERAL AND ON THE GROUND

ASGHHHGHSUUASDGUDJKGJKGSDJDSGJJSKDKSDGKJHSDKJ

BODS, you GENIUS. You MASTERMIND, you VILLAIN.

I HAVE SO MUCH MORE I WANT TO KNOW!!!!!

I mean, spectacular job, as always. You are really just so talented at writing, and I love that I get to read your work. Thank you so very much for sharing it. I am now going to go lay down and let the grass consume me. Farewell.