#but it was like saying maybe 55-60 in a 40...

[nataliaromanova-official]

1. I don't know my biological parents. As for adopted it's rocky, but it's getting there.

2. Dani( @thewhitespiderwitch), James(he doesn't have an account yet, but I'm trying to help him make one) and now Yelena( @your-fav-russian-assassin/ @the-best-black-widow), also my cat Liho and my baby( @babyromanoff-stevie)

3. I had a lot of regrets in the past, but I made up for them

4. Maybe a bit...

5. Taken and married to James Buchanan Barnes of the 107th

6. I already died in the way I would've wanted to :)

7. A peanut butter and jelly sandwich

8. Dodgeball and that was fun since everyone else lost

9. No

10. A few hours ago

11. I love James

12. Yes

13. Dreykov

14. Dani... She's on a mission right now.

15. Yes a cat named Liho. I also kinda have Alpine now, because she's Bucky's cat.

16. Stressed

17. maybe, I remember doing so for sure when I was on the run from the government

18. No. I'm Black Widow

19. Yea, to save my little sisters from the Red Room, because they didn't deserve it.

20. In Central park

21. Missions, missions, missions

22. I already have Stevie: @babyromanoff-stevie

23. 8 on both ears

24. Math and PE for an actual school subject and combat and ballet for others

25. Not at the moment, no.

26. Sleep(I probably won't get it though)

27. No

28. No

29. Yes

30. Tony Stark

31. James Barnes

32. Black, I also like Red

33. Yes

34. The Red Room

35. @thewhitespiderwitch

36. No

37. No

38.no

39. 13(don't ask)

40. No

51. Peanut butter and jelly

52. It better

53. Say "Good night" to James

54. NOPE

55. If I am I probably have a reason for it

56. A lot

57. I didn't at first, but now I do

58. Snow is great. So are storms

59. Yea, it's so beautiful and I grew up with it

60. Already am

61. Yea, I mostly get "Doll" though

62. James, my family, the Avengers occasionally

63. No

64. Yes

65. So this has happened and we got together, but broke up, realizing that we're better as friends

66. @clintbarton-thearrowguy

67. Stark unfortunately

68. Probably James or Dani

69. I didn't, but I do now

70. Dani, James and Yelena

70 horrible questions ... Fuck it

01: Do you have a good relationship with your parents? 02: Who did you last say “I love you” to? 03: Do you regret anything? 04: Are you insecure? 05: What is your relationship status? 06: How do you want to die? 07: What did you last eat? 08: Played any sports? 09: Do you bite your nails? 10: When was your last physical fight? 11: Do you like someone? 12: Have you ever stayed up 48 hours? 13: Do you hate anyone at the moment? 14: Do you miss someone? 15: Have any pets? 16: How exactly are you feeling at the moment? 17: Ever made out in the bathroom? 18: Are you scared of spiders? 19: Would you go back in time if you were given the chance? 20: Where was the last place you snogged someone? 21: What are your plans for this weekend? 22: Do you want to have kids? How many? 23: Do you have piercings? How many? 24: What is/are/were your best subject(s)? 25: Do you miss anyone from your past? 26: What are you craving right now? 27: Have you ever broken someone’s heart? 28: Have you ever been cheated on? 29: Have you made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry? 30: What’s irritating you right now? 31: Does somebody love you? 32: What is your favourite color? 33: Do you have trust issues? 34: Who/what was your last dream about? 35: Who was the last person you cried in front of? 36: Do you give out second chances too easily? 37: Is it easier to forgive or forget? 38: Is this year the best year of your life? 39: How old were you when you had your first kiss? 40: Have you ever walked outside completely naked? 51: Favourite food? 52: Do you believe everything happens for a reason? 53: What is the last thing you did before you went to bed last night? 54: Is cheating ever okay? 55: Are you mean? 56: How many people have you fist fought? 57: Do you believe in true love? 58: Favourite weather? 59: Do you like the snow? 60: Do you wanna get married? 61: Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you baby? 62: What makes you happy? 63: Would you change your name? 64: Would it be hard to kiss the last person you kissed? 65: Your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? 66: Do you have a friend of the opposite sex who you can act your complete self around? 67: Who was the last person of the opposite sex you talked to? 68: Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with? 69: Do you believe in soulmates? 70: Is there anyone you would die for?

[beaversatemygrandma]

Another thing about the other day (27th) my playlist in the car decided to stab me in the gut and twist it.

Famous Last Words. MCR. That shit hit me like a truck for some reason. Breaking out sobbing while driving, thinking about my dog, and probably pissing off the guy I was accidentally tailgating bc I Needed To Go Home and was uncharacteristically speeding.

"I am not afraid to keep on living I am not afraid to walk this world alone Honey, if you stay, I'll be forgiven Nothing you can say can stop me going home"

*screams*

[isjkrowlingdeadnow]

26/05/24

No

[nanaminokanojo]

BAD NEWS | CHAPTER INDEX/PROLOGUE (Part 1-64)

-just when you thought you were over your humongous crush on your older brother’s best friend, geto suguru, you couldn’t be more dead wrong, and maybe there isn’t really anything holding you back from acting on it now that you’re all grown up…except satoru doesn’t like suguru for you because he knows his kind all too well: a huge ass playboy who breaks hearts like he changes socks. but you think. MAYBE you’ll be the exception...maybe not.

CHARACTERS: drummer!geto suguru x (fem/afab) reader x guitarist!sukuna | gojo satoru | itadori yuuji | kugisaki nobara | fushiguro megumi | sukuna | fushiguro toji | nanami kento | choso | tsukumo yuuki | shoko ieiri | utahime iori

GENRE: full-length smau + prose | band au, tats, piercings, the whole shebang | college au | stupid pining | aged-up characters | friends to lovers (?) | this is gonna have smutty stuff because why not?

TW/CW: strong/mature language | adult content so mdni on some parts; just skip them. you’re not missing much | mentions of alcohol, drugs | mentions of cheating, promiscuity, mild dubcon (consent >>>), etc. | again, god-awful pet names i’d cringe at if a 3d person says it | toxic behavior | will add more if something arises

AKI’S NOTES: I would like to express my sincerest thanks to everyone who loved and supported “Thawing Ice Queen” as well as those who participated in the poll on which smau I’m going to write next. So, this is what won in said poll, and I hope it gets as much as love as TIQ if not more. Reblogs and likes are very much appreciated, and I actively respond to comments as well as Asks. Also, if you’re interested, I will include you in the tag list. Just message me through whatever avenue you’re most comfortable with. Happy reading!

ADDITIONAL NOTES: i will be using pics and other media which would fit situations and make the smau-ness of this piece a little more realistic and entertaining when i believe it’s appropriate/fitting to the plot (as i've done with TIQ). having said that, with regard to inclusivity, i just want to put it out there that they will not necessarily be aimed as the exact descriptions to fit a supposedly generic reader nor will they be representative of a specific race or color (even if you’re/the reader is gojo’s sister here). it’s all for the simple fact of media availability, for funsies and the fact that i don’t exclusively write in consideration of those aspects when using reader-insert characters unless i specify it. thank you for understanding.

MASTERLIST

CHAPTERS: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15

16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 | 22 | 23 | 24 | 25 | 26 | 27 | 28 | 29 | 30

31 | 32 | 33 | 34 | 35 | 36 | 37 | 38 | 39 | 40 | 41 | 42 | 43 | 44 | 45

46 | 47 | 48 | 49 | 50 | 51 | 52 | 53 | 54 | 55 | 56 | 57 | 58 | 59 | 60

61 | 62 | 63 | 64 | CHAPTER INDEX II

© ORIGINAL WORK BY nanaminokanojo. CHARACTERS ARE INSPIRED BY GEGE AKUTAMI’S “JUJUTSU KAISEN”. [20240331]

PHOTOS/IMAGES/GIF/FANART/ANY MEDIA CREDITS GO TO THE RESPECTIVE OWNERS.

[razorblade180]

The Grand Bet!

March: Dan Heeeeeng! Can you make dinner tonight?

Dan Heng: You didn’t eat with your masters?

March: We cut training short today. But get this! I bumped into master Yunli on the way here and she confessed her and Yanqing have Cloud Knight business to discuss at his. I would’ve loved to try his cooking!

Caelus:Ah, so you weren’t invited.

Stelle:You two would probably eat his budget.

March:Like you aren’t any different!? I wouldn’t eat that much. Surly less than someone like Jing Yuan.

Dan Heng:Oh, he’s joining as well. That means it’s possible all the Generals are.

March:W-Why? I just said Jing Yuan because why wouldn’t he be there?

Caelus:Why would he be?

March:Because……why would he miss a home cooked dinner? I know he’s busy but eventually he’d go home to at least leftovers.

CSD:…..

March:Why are you looking at me like that?

Caelus:March, Jing Yuan and Yanqing do not live together. Yanqing has his own residence.

March:Really?! All by himself!?

Dan Heng:He gets paid a lieutenant’s wage. He can afford an apartment easily.

March:Well that’s weird! Yunli didn’t mention that at all. I think I even mentioned how fancy the general’s house might be. She could’ve spoken up!

Stelle:Or she was fine with you being wrong.

March:So what, they’re having a dinner together? I wouldn’t tease her about that. Is it that embarrassing?

Dan Heng: What do you think is going to happen?

March:Eating and talking! Maybe someone will say something ridiculous. I guess it could be a date. That explains not inviting me.

Caelus:If that’s the case-

Stelle: Why not go to restaurant instead of his place? For Cloud Knight matters of all things!?

March:….*red* I don’t like what you’re implying!

Caelus: You mean the truth?

March:Not my adorable masters!

Dan Heng:It adds up. Neither of them seem like the type to be okay sharing a kiss in public.

Stelle:Dan Heng, nobody needs an entire apartment for a single kiss.

Dan Heng:…But they’re responsible.

Caelus:Now since when does that matter around a crush?

March:I refuse to hear you slander them. They’re far too awkward to get passed a dinner and a movie.

Dan Heng: That is Jing Yuan’s disciple. A kiss is on the table.

Stelle:I think you’re both wrong. March, your masters are totally making out. I do believe they’re responsible, but not that responsible! 20,000 credits on it.

March:Well I know them better and I think you’re wrong! 25,000 on just a dinner plus confessions!

Dan Heng: I’m sticking with kiss.

Caelus: Make out session.

Stelle: You can’t steal my-

Caelus:AND….they will be dumb enough to leave evidence. Somehow, some way, they are going to mess up.

Stelle:…Can we be one team?

Caelus:Oh now it sounds appealing!? We split it 60/40

Stelle:55/45! I’m broke. I will do your chores too.

Caelus:Fine.

Dan Heng:If you’re both wrong then you pay March and I 50,000 credits each.

March:Oh I love these odds!

Stelle and Caelus: Deal.

xxxxxx

The next day came quickly. The four stooges all waited in the training garden as Yanqing walked in.

Yanqing:Ummm did I get more students? Wasn’t expecting so many faces this morning.

Stelle:We had nothing else better to do so we thought we’d hangout for a minute.

March:Where’s master Yunli? You both usually race here to try teach your swordplay before the other.

Yanqing:Oh, um she’s probably a little busy. It’s not long before she goes home after all.

Dan Heng:It is getting close to that time. I could imagine her trying to make the most of her time left now that things are getting calm,

Yanqing:That does sound like something she’d do. *rubs head*

The stooges:(He’s holding out on us.)

March:Oh! I almost forgot. You two had dinner last night. Did it get well?

Yanqing:..It was fine. My cooking was criticized but she still ate two plates. We got through Cloud Knight business pretty quickly. Sorry I couldn’t treat you as well.

March:Water under the bridge. I’m amazed you two got along well enough. I thought I would hear another fight.

Yanqing:We don’t always fight.

Caelus:Then what’s the bruise on your neck?

The boy immediately went to adjust his collar, only to realize it was still perfectly in place. Suddenly, his body froze as he felt mortified. How’d he fall for such a bluff!? March and Dan Heng felt their wallets start to hurt while Caelus and Stelle gained a grin that might as will belong on Aha.

Stelle:What’s the matter Yanqing? You look pale.

Caelus:Kindly pull down your collar and we will go in peace.

Yanqing:You all made a bet, didn’t you?

Dan Heng:If it makes you feel better, March and I thought highly of you both.

Yanqing:I’m so sorry.

March:Nooo! *drops to knees*

Stelle:For clarification, you didn’t didn’t…

Yanqing:*red* Of course not! We aren’t dumb!

Stelle:Yeaaaaah! I expect my credits handed, not wired.

Caelus:*pats Yanqing shoulder* I don’t think they’re arguing with the results. Don’t worry about the collar.

Yanqing:Thank you.

Dan Heng:So, where’s Yunli exactly?

xxxxx

Lingsha:Medicine that removes bruises?

Yunli: *in Yanqing’s clothes* Yes. That’s all I require.

Lingsha:….

Yunli:…..Please don’t tell grandpa.

Lingsha:You have my silence. I’m just a little annoyed I now owe Jing Yuan and Feixiao 50,000 credits.

Yunli:YOU MADE A BET ON ME!?

Lingsha:In confidence, and you failed me! Just like that, they got the money back from the medical bill! *sends money*

xxxxxx

Feixiao:And that’s why you’re the Divine Foresight! We drink tonight!

Jing Yuan:Please, I’d rather not pay property damages with this. I’ll give you my share if you don’t drink until you’re home.

Feixiao:Deal!

Jing Yuan:…Was this your endgame?

Feixiao:Perhaps. Don’t worry. This goes towards a good cause.

xxxxx

Moze:How’s it feel?

Jiaoqiu: *holding cane* Natural. It’s pretty remarkable actually. How much was it?

Feixiao: *smiles* It was basically free.

[archeolatry]

So there was a point in my work life when Ron Mael was my mortal enemy archnemesis. True story.

I used to work at a famous arthouse theater in West LA from about 2002 until ‘08-’09, when I moved up at another theater in the chain. Even then I was often called in to pinch-hit when the famous place was expecting a film to be busy or if they needed someone between new hires. (I left the company at the end of 2015.)

One of the downsides to working there was that parking was pretty terrible. The theater itself was built in the 1920s, and the street to the east of it was almost all apartments. Most of those were built from the ‘40s up until the ‘60s, so they were largely street parking only. Not to mention the fact that the street on the west side of the theater was getting busier-- hipster boutiques and Pan-Asian eateries had started popping up a few blocks down the road from us. (IYKYK.)

So the employees of the theater, the video store, and the less-hip restaurants next to the main drag all had to compete with customers of said businesses —as well as those of the used bookstore— for the handful of double-stacked spaces in the back alley. The best space was the fairly generous single spot by the dumpster. You weren’t gonna get towed because you blocked someone in, or get blocked in yourself, or risk your car’s bumper by parking in the other, shorter single space by the freeway on-ramp; you could simply just park your car and forget about it until your shift was over- no need to play musical chairs. And if your shift ended after midnight and you had the day’s cash earnings stuffed in your jacket to deposit at the bank, the closeness of the spot was optimal.

That is all to say that the dumpster spot was hot property.

Cue the Black Volkswagen Thing.

(I marked The Thing even then because a member of the theater’s Rocky Horror cast also owned a Volkswagen Thing, though his was white. I thought it funny that two of the same rare car* should converge in this one place, often on the same day.)

The Thing did not belong to the theater staff. It did not belong to the video store staff. (I asked.) It did not belong to the staff of the used bookstore, who had three dedicated spots and never had enough customers to need more than two employees at a time**. (It might have belonged to one of the restaurants, but we hadn’t the Spanish nor Arabic skills to ask.) Nevertheless, The Thing was parked in the dumpster spot at some point during almost every weekend, and it would be there at the worst possible time.

It seemed that I could rarely beat The Thing to the coveted space no matter how early I got there. Maybe if I showed up before 4. But very often between 4:30 and 5:55, The Thing was there. Sometimes I stuck my head out the back door during a shift to see if the space was free. If it wasn’t, it was because a car had parked there after The Thing had left. And sometimes The Thing had the audacity to take up the other single spot to the same result. It seemed The Thing existed entirely to spot-block me.

Then one day, while I was attempting to park, I saw a man coming from the bookstore towards the lot. It was Boss Accountant***.

Boss Accountant was a lithe man with a stern face and plastered hair that was too black for his age; he usually dressed in a crisp white shirt and tie with proper trousers, and seemed like he was on his lunch break from an accounting firm despite it being the weekend. He looked like the boss battle in a video game where you had to fight your way through an office building; the final accountant you had to beat to level up. I had seen him at the bookstore more than once.

I put my car into park —hazard lights on— waiting to see which spot would be freed up.

Boss Accountant was approaching The Thing.

A customer! It was a customer that had been spot-blocking me! Not even one of my fellow workers there for a six-hour haul, but someone there for a capricious ninety minutes at best. And a customer of the stuffy bookstore to boot. Clearly not deserving of the coveted spot.

I glared at him beneath my sunglasses while he took his sweet time getting there. I tried not to begrudge the old man, BUT…!

My fingers drummed irritably against the steering wheel. This fucker. I inched slightly closer as he got in the car. The spot was MINE gatdammit and no one else was gonna come along and take it.

Finally, after an irritably long time (and probably him figuring out that I wasn’t a crazed fan trying to box him in but someone gunning for the coveted parking space) the backup lights came on. I reversed. He pulled out and drove away. I pulled in, triumphant. Spot-blocked no more! At least, not on that day. In my own mind, I had tangled with The Thing and won. (I was like 23 and undiagnosed, bruh- go easy on me here.)

Then one day the dumpster spot got painted off as disabled parking, and the dumpsters were moved to the other single spot, leaving us all to fend for ourselves in the double-stack and on the street.

I’m unsure what year this all took place, and I didn’t know (at the time) what had become of Boss Accountant and The Thing, since I saw less of them after that. Thinking back, it was probably promo and touring for Hello Young Lovers or 21x21/Exotic Creatures... that took him/it away. My moving to the other theater made the point moot anyway. (It’s definitely moot now as the bookstore was razed for a new-build apartment sometime in 2016. The new building does not have its own parking garage.)

However, enough time had passed that I didn’t recognize Boss Accountant when I sold him a ticket for The Umbrellas of Cherbourg during a slow weekend matinee in 2014. Pleasant demeanor. Polite smile. Crisp shirt, too-black plastered hair. Didn’t order concessions, didn’t dwell in the lobby but went right into the theater. The old man was surely out of earshot when my manager looked over at me. “Do you have any idea who that was?”

“No.”

“That was Ron Mael from Sparks.”

“Who?”

---

Thank goodness I watched The Sparks Brothers at home on Netflix, cuz when I saw that car I about lost my gatdamn mind.

*J, the Rocky Horror guy, told me they were rare. Looking up info now, I see that less than 30k of them were made for the North American market, and they were only sold in the US from 1973-74. A 2017 report from an informal registry of Thing owners estimates around 5k of them still exist today in the entire US. Weird, right?

**The bookstore itself was highly curated and had the mid-century Spartan sparseness of a Bell Telephone Laboratories office. I didn’t care for it much; it was too hoity-toity and tended to eschew paperbacks even of Very Good Books for rare or collectible hardcovers. It wasn’t particularly welcoming, and didn’t even really have much of an Old Book Smell. But in the days before The Pocket Internet, employees were allowed to read while the film played, and sometimes you just needed a New And/Or Different Book. ***This addition is about 75 notes too late, but I felt the need to clarify. We had lots of 'recurring characters' that we ended up giving Sex and the City-style names to, as one often does in a service environment. We had a man we called Large Diet because, through physical or mental impairment, those were the only words he would/could croak out like some bizarro Pokémon (tho he later added "Thanks."). We had a man -whose real name I learned but forgot- that we called Lincoln because he had a chinstrap beard. (He was Lincolnesque in no other way. He was of average height, pudgy, and of a merry sort of disposition.) So, naturally, the man from bookstore got himself a moniker just for sticking out, despite the fact that we never spoke and only Acknowledged Each Other With A Nod In That Way White People Do For Some Reason. (You know what I mean.)

[tyunkus]

WAIIT kumi you said to an anon that you usually see someone as either sub or dom exclusively i need to know your opinions on txt (other than beom cos you said beom’s a true switch which is so so true)

OOPS nono i meant like its usually clearer to identify sub or dom LEANING but not necessarily exclusively either does that make sense HAHA i think all of txt could do both but i think everyone (but beomgyu) would do one or the other more often

yj - sub! like 60 sub/40 dom. dont get me wrong he is a WONDERFUL SEXY AMAZING dom he leaves you absolutely wrecked n drooly when he doms but alsooo. like seeing how hes an only child + he was clearly babied for so much of his life + he acts like THAT around his members i cant help but think he leans into subbing more often..... he loves the attention! loves being spoiled and broken and treated nice n rough <3 something about having you treat him like one of your toys or some precious jewel makes him so fucking hard <33 give it to him pls <3

sb - dom... but only slightly so. maybe 55/45.. i think since hes the leader he would be more inclined to dom since that would mean assuming a role hes somewhat already used to? likes giving out directions to you, seeing how eager u are to obey when he tells u to get on ur knees and suck his cock.. also likes having the final say, watching ur face crumble when he says youre not allowed to cum. power dynamics stuff like that hes into. but also that just makes it all the sweeter when he subs and lets you do all the thinking <3333

bg - again. switch. very 50/50 in my opinion. either way he goes HARRD! firm believer in treat others the way u want to be treated meaning... if he doms and hes so mean and nasty and pervy and slaps you around and spits in your mouth he'll expect the exact same treatment from YOU when hes a sub. be mean to him!!! as mean as he is to you!!! he fucking loves it

th - i thinkkkk dom, 65/35. similar to soobin he likes having a lot of control and power in vulnerable situations like this, he has a very clear way of doing things so for him its more convenient to be in charge and ALSO he just likes seeing how easily you bend and twist yourself to please him. heart swells seeing how good you are for him, how well he's trained you....... but again like soobin it just makes it that much hotter when he subs because like <3 you got your hot sexy dominant bf to be all whimpery under u <3

kai - sub! 70/30!!!! kai is the most "malleable" i think... like the only thing thats on his mind is pleasing you.. so if you feel like domming he is more than ready to sub, start begging to taste ur pussy and whatnot.. i think hes just very into pleasing u no matter what so power dynamics dont really matter that much to him! and even if you just wanna be a lil subby instead you will most likely end up in a subxsub situation than have kai be the dom ykwim HASHJKH just both of you brainless sweethearts grinding against each other and drooling into each others mouths.... dom kai is hot too though especially since its more rare.. opens up the possibilities for size kink n size training anything to do w size actually hehe

[sparklingmusicofstars]

In my opinion, the harem's chances of winning Catarina's heart now are given the development of future relationships for them, from the highest chance to the lowest chance.

Geordo, maybe currently Geordo's highest chance is around 60%, but if Geordo changes his love pursuit tactics then there could be around a 99% chance for him to win (almost absolutely).

Sophia, currently she has the smallest chance below the average of around 10%, but if she fully realizes who she was in her old life, and immediately tells Catarina, then there is a big possibility Catarina will get excited and increase her chances to around 98% (almost absolute).

Maria, currently her chances are probably around 50%, the second highest, but if Maria is more aggressive and proactive in trying to get Catarina's love, then her chances will certainly increase to around 95% (almost absolute too).

Sora, currently his chances are probably around 40%, but if he is more openly honest and aggressive with his actions to get her love, plus his knowledge about women, then most likely the chances will increase to around 90% for him.

Cezar, maybe currently his chances are around 10%, but if he is more openly honest and shows aggressiveness, proactivity, then his chances will increase to around 90% for him.

Raphael, their relationship seems good so far, maybe the odds are currently about 30% in his favor, but if he is more open and honest about his feelings, then a little aggressive, I don't think it will take long to develop, about 90% for him.

Nicole, currently the initial chance may be small at around 15%, but if she is open and honest about her feelings, then becomes aggressive and proactive then the chance increases to around 85% for her (although Catarina has quite a hard time accepting Nicole's feelings so she needs more time).

Keith, currently his chances are probably around 30%, Catarina still sees him as his brother, so if Keith is more open and more determined and tries to love him by being aggressive again and being a real, brave man, then his chances are around 85 % (still too small).

Alan, currently his chances are around 10%, I'm not sure his chances will increase, even though he is more open and honest about his feelings, because he can't be more aggressive or proactive so his chances are around 70%.

Mary, currently her chances are probably around 10%, the same as Alan, I'm not sure it will increase much, maybe if Mary is more aggressive and more open and honest in her confession then the chances will increase to around 65% for her (no hope ).

that's what I think, thank you

Hi,

Sorry to answer so late I'm quite busy lately ^^;

I agree about Geordo but not about Sophia, I think that if Catarina discovers that she is the reincarnation of her best friend, they will indeed be closer but not to a romantic point. Monkey girl never saw Acchan in a romantic light and Catarina never did for Sophia even though she can see similarities between Sophia and Acchan. Moreover Catarina doesn't seem to see the girls as potential love interests.

Maria has indeed high chances but not in a romantic way, and Catarina has no problem supporting Maria's relationships with Cyrus and Dewey. She would even go as far as to scolding them if they don't do much effort. She seems to mainly see Maria as "the heroine of an otome game". It seems that she can't help but think of Maria this way and that lowers her chances.

I think Cezar's chances are a bit higher than that, I would say currently 40% and it could improve if he tries a little more.

I'm not really sure for Raphael but I woud say that now his chances are a bit higher, maybe 50% since he made real progress in LN14. And he even got the being-comforted-by-the-heroine scene in otome games.

I agree for Nicol, Alan and Mary but I think Keith's chances are a bit higher, maybe around 55% too but if he tries to act more "manly" they could improve greatly.

You can check these two posts for more precisions :

[vinylshifting]

ANSWERING THESE 70 QUESTIONS

(but my dr self!)

01: Do you have a good relationship with your parents?

Sure, they dont really care ehat i do so thats nice

02: Who did you last say “I love you” to?

my girlfrienddd

03: Do you regret anything?

Moving to america wahh (even though it wasnt my choice)

04: Are you insecure?

not really

05: What is your relationship status?

taken <33

06: How do you want to die?

eithee in a super cool awesome way or at my own hands /hj

07: What did you last eat?

cant remember

08: Played any sports?

i like to play hockey sometimes

09: Do you bite your nails?

nope

10: When was your last physical fight?

cant remember

11: Do you like someone?

My girlfrienndd

12: Have you ever stayed up 48 hours?

Yep

13: Do you hate anyone at the moment?

Annoying ppl at school

14: Do you miss someone?

Not really tbh

15: Have any pets?

yes! my cat elivera

16: How exactly are you feeling at the moment?

Tired

17: Ever made out in the bathroom?

Wouldnt you like to know

18: Are you scared of spiders?

Nope

19: Would you go back in time if you were given the chance?

Maybe

20: Where was the last place you snogged someone?

What does that even mean bruh

21: What are your plans for this weekend?

sleep and play elden rings

22: Do you want to have kids? How many?

NO

23: Do you have piercings? How many?

snake bites would be cool

24: What is/are/were your best subject(s)?

Anything science or music

25: Do you miss anyone from your past?

nope, but maybe my friends from my hometown when i was little

26: What are you craving right now?

Some zaxbys

27: Have you ever broken someone’s heart?

never

28: Have you ever been cheated on?

Nope, my girlfriend is my first (and only) relationship

29: Have you made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry?

i dont think so

30: What’s irritating you right now?

School 100%

31: Does somebody love you?

My girlfriend

32: What is your favourite color?

Grey, any shade of grey

33: Do you have trust issues?

A tiny bit

34: Who/what was your last dream about?

Cant remember

35: Who was the last person you cried in front of?

My online friend

36: Do you give out second chances too easily?

Sometimes

37: Is it easier to forgive or forget?

Forget

38: Is this year the best year of your life?

I cherish every year

39: How old were you when you had your first kiss?

13??? maybe 14

40: Have you ever walked outside completely naked?

No, and never plan to

51: Favourite food?

SOUP 🔥🔥 any kind i love soup

52: Do you believe everything happens for a reason?

Yes

53: What is the last thing you did before you went to bed last night?

Probably jerk off scroll instagram reels

54: Is cheating ever okay?

No never

55: Are you mean?

I wouldnt say i am

56: How many people have you fist fought?

Idfk

57: Do you believe in true love?

Yes

58: Favourite weather?

RAIN, or cloudy days. i like the cold

59: Do you like the snow?

yes 100%

60: Do you wanna get married?

To my girlfriend yes

61: Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you baby?

Only when its my girlfriend

62: What makes you happy?

My friends, Alcohol, My girlfriend

63: Would you change your name?

No

64: Would it be hard to kiss the last person you kissed?

Nope

65: Your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?

Pepper spray, im locked in with my girl

66: Do you have a friend of the opposite sex who you can act your complete self around?

Not really

67: Who was the last person of the opposite sex you talked to?

My mom

68: Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?

My girlfriend

69: Do you believe in soulmates?

Yes

70: Is there anyone you would die for?

My girlfriend or my friends

(feel free to take this idea too!!)

[elisysd]

Gold Rush Masterlist

Sequel to Cruel Summer (Charles Leclerc x OC), can be read independently

Prologue

1.Guess my childhood is over

2.Tonight is gonna be the loneliest

3.We are invincible, we are unstoppable

4.Vultures spinning up above for what's left of me

5.They say it's bad karma being such a heartbreaker

6.If you fail to plan, you plan to fail

7.Maybe together we can get somewhere

8.I've got memories and travel like gypsies in the night

9.Personally, I think you'd be better with somebody like me

10.Way down we go

11.That's why I'm lying to my therapist

12.You could be my luck even if the sky is falling down

13.Lately you've been searching for a darker place to hide

14.I could be so sweet if only I were naive

15.Burn, crash, romance, I’ll take what I can get from you

16.And I wanna kiss you, make you feel alright

17.I’ve been thinking way too loud, I wish that I could block me out

18.And if the storm is hitting I'll try to keep you steady

19.Ask me what I earned from all those tears

20.All I know is this could either break my heat or bring it back to life

21.Sleeping's so tough you're burning up my mind

22.It's a love story baby just say yes

23.Cause space is just a word made up by someone who's araid to get too close

24.But there's a shining in the shadows

25.I'll be there till it all feels so big, till it all feels so small

26.I’ve been feeling everything from hate to love, from love to lust, from lust to truth

27.Take the moment and taste it, you’ve got no reason to be afraid.

28.You've got a friend in me

29.Why don't you let me down, I'll let you do it again

30.Can you make it feel like home if I tell you you’re mine?

31.I know heaven’s a thing, I go there when you touch me

32.Maybe there's nothing after midnight that could make you stay

33.You're scared of love, well, aren't we all?

34.Don't get too close, it's dark inside, it's where my demons hide

35.Fear or love, baby? Don't say the answer

36.And what hurts the most is people can go from people you know to people you don't

37.Should I give up or should I just keep chasing pavements?

38.What am I now? What if I'm someone I don't want around?

39.And I just wanna tell you it takes everything in me not to call you

40.You know I'm afraid of change, guess that's why we stay the same

41.How long can we be a sad son 'til we were too far gone to bring back to life?

42.If to change is what you need you can change right next to me

43.I tell myself I'm good, but I'm falling apart

44.Can you keep me close? Can you love me most?

45.Lean on me when you're not strong and I'll be your friend

46.I'll be late, but I could make it all up to you

47.I wanna be better, I wanna be new but I can’t be those things next to you

48.Knew we would crash at the speed that we were going

49.You said that you needed space, go on then, astronaut

50.I trace the evidence, make it make some sense, why the wound is still bleedin'

51. Heaven knows I should let go, it’s nothing that I don’t already know

52. Where there is a flame, someone's bound to get burned

53. You’re blowing through my mind like the hurricane

54. Did some force take you because I didn't pray?

55. Take a heart and take a hand, like an ocean takes the dirty sand

56. I know you're scared and your pain is imperfect but don't you give up on yourself

57. Lately she's been dressing for revenge

58. Hold on and hope that we'll find our way back in the end

59. I don't ask for much, gimme love

60. But I promise you this I'll always look out for you

Epilogue

BONUS CHAPTERS

Our first christmas

A trip to Bali

My place is yours 

We want you to be their godparents

Double trouble

Marry me?

A bold move

My favorite enemy

It’s not you and I anymore

Not this fucking family

[screamsortega]

smut prompts;

01. “i’ve been thinking about you all day.”

02. “how badly do you want me?”

03. “i just cannot get enough of you.”

04. “looks like someone is jealous.”

05. “better keep quiet, there’s people just outside the door.”

06. “just say you want me, and i’m all yours.”

07. “show me just how much you’ve missed me.”

08. “you know you love me.”

09. “it’s hot when you talk back”

10. “if you called just to get off at my voice, i’m hanging up.”

11. “you look so good with my hand wrapped around your throat.”

12. “bend over the desk, baby.”

13. “i haven’t even touched you yet and you’re already this wet?”

14. “stop distracting me.”

15. “take it off, slowly.”

16. “what do you think your punishment should be?”

17. “do that again, i dare you.”

18. “sit on my face.”

19. “i love it when you moan my name.”

20. “let me give you a reason to stay in bed.”

21. “prove to me that you deserve my tongue.”

22. “no panties? you dirty girl”

23. “you can get louder, if you want.”

24. “if you want to cum then you better start begging.”

25. “you don’t know how much i want to fuck you against that window just so people would see who you belong too.”

26. “my thoughts about you aren’t really appropriate.”

27. “i thought i told you to stay still?”

28. “come one, be a good girl and spread your legs.”

29. “focus, only on me.”

30. “who do you belong to?”

31. “show me how you pleasure yourself.”

32. “you know, it’s really distracting when you do that.”

33. “you look so good on your knees.”

34. “well, what do we have here? someone must’ve gotten impatient and decided to touch theirselves.”

35. “i’m not going to let you cum, i don’t care how much you beg.”

36. “i promise you this, when we get home i’m going to tear off those clothes of yours and fuck you so hard that you won’t be able to function tomorrow.”

37. “i want to fuck you in front of a mirror so you’ll see how good you take it.”

38. “does it feel good when i touch you like this?”

39. “you talk too much, maybe if i shove my dick in your mouth maybe you’ll shut up.

40. “oh, i’m not done with you, get back here.”

41. “you wanna cum? have you earned it yet?”

42. “aw, out of breath already? did i go too fast, baby?”

43. “don’t be shy, come and taste me.”

44. “be a good girl and take it.”

45. “you heard me, take it off.”

46. “i wasn’t expecting you to be this tight.”

47. “i’m gonna fuck you so good that you’ll forget your own name.”

48. “like what you see?”

49. “i don’t care how good it feels, you better not cum until i tell you to.”

50. “i love the sounds you make once you come undone.”

51. “just relax, let me do all the work.”

52. “touch yourself, i want to watch.”

53. “need some help?”

54. “i know it hurts, but be a good girl and take it.”

55. “do you have any toys?”

56. “better watch that mouth of yours if you want to cum.”

57. “where do you want it?”

58. “i didn’t know someone could cum that fast just from a few fingers.”

59. “that’s right baby, scream my name, let everyone know who this pussy belongs to.”

60. “you’re so needy.”

61. “swallow, all of it.”

62. “you wanna act like a slut? then you’ll get treated like a slut.”

63. “i’ve barely touched you and you’re already shaking.”

64. “i love it when you beg.”

65. “come sit on my lap.”

66. “don’t even think about cumming yet.”

67. “so, i hear that you’re into pain?”

68. “be a good girl and swallow for me.”

69. “you better keep the volume down or i’ll go even harder.”

70. “i’m feeling a bit greedy today.”

71. “clothes off, now.”

72. “your boyfriend/girlfriend doesn’t need to know about this, okay?”

73. “you better not touch yourself while i’m gone.”

74. “i’m gonna fuck you so good that you’ll forget about him/her.”

75. “i never knew you liked to be spanked.”

76. “use your words, baby.”

77. “i bet i can make you cum without even touching you.”

78. “i want to kiss every square inch of your body.”

79. “is that gonna fit?” | “i’ll make it fit.”

80. “all day i’ve been thinking about how good it would feel to have your head between my thighs.”

81. “but there’s people-” | “i don’t care, let them watch.”

82. “you look so pretty when you cry.”

authors note;

send a request with a character + smut prompt number (if you want to use a prompt)

also, i will probably add more prompts here and there.

[virgil-isnt-a-lee]

If all the Sanders Sides characters were switches, what percentage of Ler/Lee would you hc them as? (Bonus points if you include Picani and Sleep)

Virgil is pretty easy, I'd give him about 75/25 lee/ler. I 100% see him with a huge lee lean, but don't underestimate him as a ler! C'mon he makes such a good ler, he absolutely plays off the anticipation and shit, and he and Roman get into tkl fights ALL the time, and someone's gotta bring princey down a peg or two, no? As a lee, he's just the cutest little shit ever, definitely tries not to giggle and fails.

Logan, hmm.. maybe 65/35 ler/lee. Definitely ler leaning when he indulges in the playfulness, but he's very methodical as a ler, he does that slight smile as he gets someone's worst spot, definitely. Makes mental notes of their reactions too. But also he gets tickled frequently when he's been working too much (usually by Patton, Roman, or Janus)

Patton is a solid 55/45 ler/lee, like ALMOST an even 50/50, but just slightly more ler leaning. Listen, he loves laughing and making the other sides laugh, even though he is the resident tickle monster and he 100% gets evil tickle monster moods, he always ends up wrecked too, and he loves both very much, but he's morality, and he just slightly loves making the other sides laugh more

Roman is an even 50/50, okay? He may start most of the tickle fights, but let's be so fr, at least half of those he starts because he wants to be tickled and he won't admit it outright. Very playful and teasy ler, probably calls the others princes or some other noble title while tickling them. Definitely curls up into a ball when he's tickled

Janus is like a good 80/20 ler/lee. He's got no problem wrecking the others, though he sometimes feels a little less secure when he's the lee, though he enjoys it occasionally. He usually only lees in three scenarios; Remus is bored and no one else is around, he didn't wreck his lee into being too tired to get revenge, or he really looks like he needs it. Very methodical ler, like Logan, but he's very teasy, unlike Logan (usually)

Remus is like 60/40 ler/lee, like Roman, he starts a lot of tickle fights, but not always because he wants tickles. A lot of things time, he just wants the chaos, the noise and laughter and adrenaline. And the tickles. As a ler, he's teasy but mostly focuses on making the lee laugh as loud as he can (he does know when to stop) as a lee, he is very squirmy but very happy and teasy, laughs really loudly and unrestrained, too.

Now I don't know too much about Emile, but I know enough to say he's probably lee leaning with a super cute laugh, so I'll give him about 70/30 lee/ler, because he and patton definitely have tickle fights.

Remy though, listen I love Remy. He's a solid 75/25 ler/lee. The other sides (really just picani) might try to tickle him out of bed, and it'll wake him up, but he'll just pull him back down into bed and tickle him until he agrees to take a nap with him.

Send me more asks y'all 😭

[mrchiipchrome]

So here are some prompts from songs that I've got ideas around, feel free to request blurbs for whoever:)

----------

1. -Honestly I’m better as your boy, I’d be kinda shitty as your man. Let’s go back to only being friends.

2. -I don’t wanna fall in love, -No?, -No.

3.  -Oh…I got way too attached, -That wasn’t the plan?, -No

4. Where’d all the time go?

5. -Time to get out, I don’t want you around.

6. -I couldn’t see you the way you saw me.

7. -I tried my best to be worth all your while, -You just gotta let me go.

8. -Loving you was a hazard, so I got my heart a helmet.

9. -You like the pretty girl, with the pretty voice?

10. -She might let you stay, but just for the night.

11. -Oh I’m down on my hands and knees, begging you please, baby.

12. -You’re making me crazy.

13. -I’m feeling so tired, really falling apart.

14. -It just doesn’t make sense to me, why you’d stick right next to me, wherever I go.

15. -I feel the way you’re looking at me through my peripherals.

16. -Next thing I know she was feeling on me.

17. -I just hope you don’t wanna leave me…

18. -Only I belong with you and only you darling.

19. -I think of her so much it drives me crazy.

20. - I hope you find peace for yourself, -New girlfriend ain’t gonna fill the void.

21. -I went to hell and back, just to find peace.

22. -I can’t describe what I’m feeling.

23. -I don’t care how long it takes, as long as I’m with you I’ve got a smile on my face.

24. -Save your tears

25. -It will be okay, as long as you’re here with me.

26. -I wish I could live through every memory again.

27. -So, can I call you tonight?

28.-She looks just like a dream.

29. It’s just like seeing her for the first time, again.

30. -Maybe it’s a blessing in disguise.

31. -I’d rather lose somebody than use somebody.

32. -It’s you and me, always forever.

33. -...is the girl that I wanna kiss.

34. -You know I get so forgetful looking in her eyes.

35. -There’s nothing to keep you from falling in love.

36. -Cause all of the small things that you do, are what reminds me why I fell for you.

37. -Don’t forget to kiss me.

38. -I might need you or I’ll break.

39. -I act like I don’t care

40. -I bet you wish that I was still right there.

41. -I think I like you best when you’re just with me and no one else.

42. -No one can save me but you.

43. -You never felt this way?

44. -I’d never dreamed that I’d love someone like you.

45. -Everytime you go away, you take a piece of me with you.

46. -I can feel your body move.

47. -I want you here with me, from tonight until the end of time.

48. -You’re just too good to be true, I can’t take my eyes off of you.

49. -You’d be like heaven to touch.

50. -Please let me know that it’s real.

51. -I wanna feel you in my arms again.

52. -You’re the light in the deepest, darkest hour.

53. -There goes my baby.

54. -I’ll never deserve you 

55. -Just hold me now

56. -What do you say when words are not enough?

57. -It feels like you don’t care

58. -No, not a single tear

59. -Tell me what you heard

60. -A pretty face with some cute lips.

61. -So kiss me once and kiss me twice, and kiss me once again.

62. -It’s been a long time.

63. -When you kiss me, heaven sighs.

64. -When you press me to your heart, oh I’m in a world apart.

65. -Give your heart and soul to me.

66. -I’m in heaven.

67. -I want my arms around you.

68. -It’s nice to have you back, where you belong.

69. -The band is playing, -One of our old favorite songs.

70. -Leave your worries on the doorstep my dear.

71. -Life can be sweet.

72. -Oh I’m on the sunny side of the street.

73. Stars shining bright above you.

74. -Dream a little dream of me.

75. -Just hold me tight and tell me you’ll miss me.

76. -Promise to me, you’ll dream.

77. -We may never, never meet again.

78. -Oh when you’re smiling, the whole world smiles with you.

79. When I saw you last night and got that old feeling.

80. -When you caught my eye, my heart stood still.

81. -Give me a kiss to build a dream on.

82. -Oh, give me your lips just for a moment.

83. -Wherever you’re going, I’m going the same way.

84. -We have all the time in the world.

85. -Give me your kisses, I’ll give you my heart.

86. -Give me the right to call you all mine.

87. -Though we’re apart, you’re part of me still.

88. -You came, -You saw?, -Oh you conquered me.

89. -Fantastic? Oh that’s you.

90. -I still get jealous.

91. -All my wildest dreams come true, -When I’m near you?

92. -Love makes me treat you the way that I do.

93. -You’re afraid each thing I do, -Is just some evil scheme?

94. -Why can’t I free your doubtful mind, and melt your cold cold heart?

95. -Pardon the smile on my face dear.

96. -Your lips are as warm and sweet as wine.

97. -I’ll keep you safe.

98. -For I can’t help falling in love with you.

99. -My heart is yours.

100. Bound to falling in love.

101. -I knew a girl just like you once.

102. -I'll always look out for you.

103. -I won't let you down.

104. -One day it'll all make sense.

105. -For you, I'd bleed myself dry.

106. -Baby, you’re the best.

107. -I haven’t seen you in a long time.

108. -I gave it all for a fantasy.

109. -I'll love you better if you let me.

110. -I'll love you forever.

111. -My heart is a broken mess

112. -Are you honest?

113. -I’ll take you just the way you are.

114. -You’ll always have my unspoken passion.

115. -I hope no one catch us, -But I kinda hope they catch us

116. -Baby you’re all mine.

117. -Maybe it couldn’t work out in the end.

118. -I know you want me.

119. -I’ve been getting mixed signals.

120. -I’m just trying to get closure.

121. -I know she’s a loser.

122. -Is it wrong?, -Is it right?

123. -Nobody does it like you do.

124. -You’ve begun to feel like home.

125. -I’ll be right here.

126. -I've been trying to get you out the friend zone.

127. -Baby, am I your little secret?

128. -And I guess I’ll just miss her, even though she isn’t even really gone…things are just different.

[bratshaws]

through the hourglass 78. brb x oc

a/n: I've been wanting to use this gif for so long. I FINALLY CAN AAAAAAAA

pairing: plus size!oc x rooster

warnings: none, just Bea being a good friend uwu

goodness gracious (pls read this one to know more what this fic is about!!)

chapter

1/2/3/4/5/6/7/8/9/10/11/12/13/14/15/16/17/18/19/20/21/22/23/24/

25/26/27/28/29/30/31/32/33/34/35/36/37/38/39/40/41/42/43/44

45/46/47/48/49/50/51/52/53/54/55/56/57/58/59/60/61/62/63/64

/65/66/67/68/69/70/71/72/73/74/75/76/77

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-

Beatrice couldn’t say how long the silence lasted, all she could do is stare at the pregnancy tests lying side by side in the drawer, partially hidden by the magazines almost as if Evelyn didn’t want to see them.

And considering her reaction, it was very possible she really didn’t want to see those tiny sticks.

Beatrice licks her lips, that were dry from her gawked expression, then moves her eyes to the lump under the covers, “Ev…I…” she blinks, how exactly could she go by this? Evelyn’s personality was different from hers, she was more than excited when she discovered she was pregnant, hell, Evelyn was there with her when she found out, “I…I…a-are you okay?”

There’s a gentle huff from under the covers, “No.”

“...okay,um…” Beatrice gently rubs her friend’s arm, chewing the inside of her cheek, “Um…do you,do you need me to do anything?”

Evelyn moves under the covers, which makes Beatrice drop her hand to her lap as the sheets slowly fall to reveal her friend. She looked awful, her eyes were swollen, her hair a mess and she didn’t seem like she slept in days not to mention how Beatrice could see a little bit of makeup still clinging to her bloodshot eyes. The same bloodshot eyes that slowly moved over to Beatrice, who gave Evelyn a small comforting smile only for it to drop as her friend looked away again, “...you here alone?”

“Yeah,Rooster and Nikki went home.” she almost felt bad mentioning Nicole considering…the situation, “He is going to pick me up once I call him, I’m not in a time crunch.”

Her joke falls flat because Evelyn doesn’t laugh, her hunched position making her appear smaller and frail, a complete opposite of what Evelyn truly was, “..okay…” and another shaky inhale was heard, followed by Evelyn running her hands on her face, combing her black hair back and dropping her hands to her lap with a dull slap. 

“...Ev…I…I…I don’t really know what to say.”

"About what?”

Bea blinked, looking back at the open drawer, “Well, um…wh-what you just indirectly told me.”

Evelyn stares ahead, a sniffle making its way out of her nose, “Me neither.”

“Just…um-do you wanna talk about it?”

Evelyn chuckles dryly, shoulders shaking with brief laughter before she shakes her head, “What is there to talk about,Bea? I don’t even know how to start this conversation.”

“Well…maybe you can…start from the beginning. Before the tests?”

Evelyn looks at Bea by the corner of her eye, looking like a complete mess, eyes crusty and tired as she stares at the brunette. Evelyn’s gaze was always very strong and confident, she never backed down, she knew what to do but right now? Right now Bea was seeing parts of Evelyn she never saw before and she didn’t know what to do. “...My period didn’t come last month.” she whispered, “But I didn’t think about it, because I was working a lot, plus Jake was gone so I assumed I was stressed.”

The taller woman pulls one of her knees up to use it as support for her head, still frowning, “And I felt nothing, no nausea, nothing hurting, nothing at all.” she inhales again, “But then this month comes and there’s still no period…so I thought I should do the test, just because I had to be sure.” her smile turned grim, “I did more than three.”

“What?”

“More than three tests, but I tossed them all out because…I…I couldn’t accept it.” she murmured, “I thought it was because the test was cheap, so I bought the expensive ones, the ones that are sturdy and can handle a good beating….and they were positive as well.”

Beatrice watches her friend slowly lower her leg and fall back on the bed, arms spread, eyes looking up at the ceiling. The brunette frowns, looking down at her friend’s stomach only to see it was still flat, covered by her sleeping shirt, “...I…see…does…does anyone know?”

Does Jake?

“No.” Evelyn mutters, “You are the first one.”

“Oh.”

“I don’t know what to do Bea.” she whispered, rolling her lips into her mouth with a subtle shake of her head, “It’s not…it wasn’t planned. Nothing was. I don’t even–” she groans, rubbing her face with her hands, sighing against her palms, “I don’t even know how to bring this up to Jake yet. We’ve been using protection, I’m taking my birth control…I don’t get it.”

Beatrice licks her lips, “Sometimes it’s…just something that happens,Ev.” she tries to explain the best she can without upsetting her friend even more, “...did you and Jake ever-”

“No, we never talked about kids.” Evelyn says, “He tried to say something about marriage but I told him I wanted to wait more,I don’t…I enjoy my independence. And he respected that.”

“I know.”

“And while Jake stays here from time to time, he understands I need some time and that I like to be alone.” she frowns, “But now? Now? What do I do? I don’t even know how to tell him this,I don’t even know what he’ll say.”

“Well,Jake loves you.” Beatrice says gently, “And…whatever you decide I’m sure he’ll support you no matter what.”

Evelyn turned to face Beatrice, pushing herself to a sitting position as her eyes dropped to her lap, “My dad…is going to skin him alive Bea.” she whispers, “He…he started to warm up to me and Jake now, he supports it as long he’s on the up and up with everything we have planned. And now…God when he finds out-hell my mom will freak the fuck out but my dad?”

“Don’t- don’t think about it now, Ev.” she says, placing a hand on her friend’s shoulder, “Are you hungry? Did you eat anything?” Evelyn shakes her head no, “I can make you something, you need to eat and maybe enjoy the sunlight a bit, it’ll be good for you.”

“Bea.”

“Yeah?”

“...can I hug you?”

Beatrice just nodded and Evelyn wrapped her arms around her shoulders, while the brunette hugged her friend by the waist. It was such…an odd feeling to be the comforting party in this situation, but she knew that Evelyn needed it and she wouldn’t let her go unless she felt good enough to. 

She didn’t cry,maybe she was already ‘dried out’ by the time that Beatrice showed up, but Evelyn held the brunette in such an iron grip that her shoulders were a bit hurt because of it. But she sat there, rubbing Evelyn’s back comfortingly as her  friend’s back rose and fell with her breathing, Beatrice was glad that she wasn’t crying at least.

After a while Evelyn leaned back, “I’m going to take a quick shower.” she whispered, meeting Beatrice’s green eyes, “Thank you,Bea.”

“You are welcome.” Beatrice got up from the bed to allow Evelyn to get up, not even putting on the fuzzy slippers as she went to the bathroom, still looking much smaller than she actually was.”I’ll be in the kitchen.” and she got a weak ‘okay’ before the bathroom’s door closed.

Beatrice sighed softly, looking down at Wiley who sat by the doorframe, mewing almost in question at her, “She’ll be fine,Wiley…come on, let’s make something for her,hm?” she hoped that would distract her mind too, because it was a lot of emotions going on in her head after all.

Being the first one to know about something like that, especially when the person in question doesn’t seem too excited about it, was very hard. Beatrice rubbed her face with both hands, huffing out a breath as she walked to the kitchen, but not before opening the curtains and letting the light enter the apartment.

She also opened the balcony’s door so the chilly October air made it’s way inside, inhaling deeply and feeling a wave of tranquility take over her as soon as she did that.

She checked the fridge, looking around for something quick and easy to make knowing her friend needed something now and not later. There was a plastic container that looked like it had vegetables and meat, Beatrice opened it up to check, “Oh,mongolian beef. This is nice.” There was also some rice in a bigger bowl covered with a plastic film, “It’ll be good enough.”

Something comforting and something easy, because Evelyn needed that.

She heard the shower running while heating up everything, exhaling in relief knowing that it’d help Evelyn feel better. Or at least she hoped. She had no idea how…to go on with this. She didn’t seem happy sharing the news to Beatrice, so maybe she shouldn’t talk about it? Maybe she should just chat about something else unless Evelyn brought it up again.

Beatrice looks towards her back pocket when her phone pings with a message and she already knows who it is from. She pulls out her phone with one hand while the other keeps stirring the meat in the pan, chewing her lower lip as she sees Rooster’s name on the screen.

Roos (12:00)

Hey,gorgeous. Everything good?

Was it? No. 

She also had no idea if she should share the news with Rooster, maybe not now, maybe…maybe later, maybe when she’s home.

Bea (12:00)

Everything is okay Roos. Evelyn is just feeling a bit under the weather. 

Roos (12:01)

Did Hangman do something wrong or something? I don’t think I ever seen Evelyn be ‘under the weather’

Oh boy.

Bea (12:01)

Oh, no no, it’s just personal stuff. I’m just with her for a little bit and then we can go to the pumpkin patch,okay?

Roos (12:02)

Okay,gorgeous. Talk to me okay? I’ll have my phone on me. Nikki is asleep and I’m just rewatching Drag Race Season 8. With the dogs.

Cue to her receiving a picture of his long legs stretched and crossed on top of the coffee table, Jolene’s head on his lap with her eyes closed, Jack lying under the coffee table and Eleanor looking up at the screen almost as if she was ready to attack it at any moment.

Bea (12:05)

You look very comfortable.

Roos (12:05)

We are,gorgeous. They’re behaving :) 

Beatrice was so focused on answering Rooster she didn’t hear the shower stop, nor heard her friend’s footsteps approaching the kitchen or the quiet mewling coming from Wiley. Evelyn stopped by the threshold, staring at Beatrice who managed to type on her phone and cook at the same time, “Bea.” her friend yelped, the phone flying off her hand to the air and the only reason it didn’t hit the ground was because it landed on the soft kitchen mat she was standing on.

“Oh!Ev!” she laughs awkwardly, leaning down to grab the phone, checking if there was anything broken and then wiping it against her sleeve, “Sorry I was talking to Roos.” she looks back at the stove, “I’m heating some stuff I got in your fridge.”

“Yeah, mongolian beef. I know.’ Evelyn said, sitting on the bar stools she had against the island in the middle of her kitchen, “Everything okay with Rooster?”

“Yeah!Everything is great!” Beatrice sends her husband a text telling him she’d message back in a few and that she loved him, then slid her phone into her pocket, “Anyway, do you want something to drink? Maybe some water?” Evelyn shook her head, rubbing her eyes with her hands before dropping her head on top of her folded arms.

Beatrice frowned as she turned the stove off and placed the lids on top of each pan before approaching her friend, touching the side of her arm gently,”Ev.” she calls, “You’ll be okay.”

Evelyn lifted her head, holding her interlaced fingers in front of her mouth as she breathed hard against her knuckles, “I don’t know what to do.” she repeats the same phrase as before, “I don’t…know what to do.”

“Well…do you…want the baby?” she knew it was a risk to ask, but Evelyn had to know what she wanted in that aspect, “It’s still early…”

Evelyn looked back at Bea, then at her hands, then to the wall opposite to them, “...thing is I…” she groans, “I do want it. I do, but…Bea, me and Jake aren’t married. And I don’t know if you know but both sides of my family are very against stuff like that.” another sigh, “it’s just…I don’t want them to blame Jake. I don’t want my father to make his life a living hell because of this.”

“Isn’t there a chance your father might be happy to be a grandpa? I mean, you are his only daughter.”

“Which is why I worry.” Evelyn says, “We talk a lot, we are more open now…but it’s fucking hard Bea. I can’t read my parents’ minds,I can’t know how they’ll truly react.” she rubs her forehead, “Not to mention the whole, Navy thing.” Beatrice furrows her brows, “You know my dad is always like ‘Duty First’ and whatever. He’ll just think that we didn’t think about the risks.”

The risks.

Oh.

Beatrice’s smile falters when that word is mentioned, that word that always,always hovered above her head and Rooster’s. He talked to her about it a bit, but he never elaborated and Beatrice worried about him often. Like always, things within their control were easy to handle…the rest, not so much.

Rooster still had the ghost of his father’s passing on his shoulders, she knew, she could see how it weighed him down sometimes. And the fear was always there, it was something they talked about often too, the risks of his profession were several and almost impossible to figure out.

Evelyn noticed how Bea got silent and she groaned once she recalled her words, “Shit,Bea,I didn’t mean-”

“No,no,no,it’s okay.” Beatrice smiles, “It’s okay…I…I know what you mean.”

Evelyn frowns, looking down at her hands, “How do you do it?” she asks quietly, “How do you deal with it? I mean…you two have Nikki now, how do you not…go crazy?”

“Therapy.” and for the first time since she got to the apartment, Evelyn laughed, weakly, but she laughed, dropping her head only to hold it up with her hand, “Honestly,I don’t know. We just…talk about it a lot, our conversations could last hours. Do you and Jake?”

“What?”

‘Talk?”

Evelyn blinks at her friend, then licks her lips, “Sometimes. I just…I mean we do talk,’ she straightens her back, “We do talk and share things, hell we both have parents in the military so that helps with…understanding and figuring out what to do but…a kid? A kid Bea. I don’t even know how…God.”

Beatrice bites the corner of her mouth, holding her hands in front of her womb as she takes in Evelyn’s words. “...what do you think your father will do once he finds out?” she asks, “Since…you want to keep it.”

“I have no idea.”

“Guess,then.”

The tall woman sighed, throwing her hands up as she begins explaining, “I don’t know. Probably…drill Jake with words and make him feel like shit. Maybe even accuse him of ‘locking me up with a child’ which is the stupidest thing ever. I love Jake, he’s a dumbass and he has his arrogant moments…but he’s sweet and he’s romantic and he treats me with respect.”

That was probably the first time Beatrice heard Evelyn talk about her relationship with Jake, and it made the brunette smile. She allowed Evelyn to keep talking as she prepared her plate, “And I care about him. I mean,Jesus, I wouldn’t let him come here if I didn’t.”

Beatrice settles the plate in front of Evelyn - the other woman couldn’t help but chuckle seeing that Beatrice arranged the beef on top of the rice to form a cat face, with the chives as whiskers - and then sits down next to her, “Then,well,I think that’s enough reason.”

“It’s not.”

“It is.” she says a bit more firmly, “You always butted heads with your parents and if you want to have this baby without being married to Jake, that’s your choice.” she shrugs, “You said yourself that he respects the fact you don’t want to get married yet.” Beatrice was very relieved when Evelyn finally took a bite of her food, keeping her eyes on the plate instead of the brunette.

“Yes,but–”

“Ev,” she says softly, “Listen, your parents have to understand that…these things happen and they should respect you and Jake…and your choices. Plus I have a feeling they’ll like it once you tell them everything.”

Evelyn slows her chewing to look at Beatrice, then chuckles softly, dropping her head forward as she swallows her food, “...I guess the roles are reversed, huh? It was usually me and Shells the ones that gave you a pep talk every now and again.”

Beatrice smiles, shrugging her shoulders, “Someone has to make sure you guys are okay.” she says, “Let that be me.”

“...thanks Bea.” Evelyn says, placing a hand on Beatrice’s shoulder, “I mean it,I really needed this.”

“You are welcome…are you going to be okay?” her friend nods, “Where’s Jake?”

“His sister is visiting,so he’s taking her for a tour.” Evelyn says as she moves the beef around her plate, “And he’ll come here by night time, after leaving her at the hotel.” she stops moving the fork, “I’ll tell him tonight.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah there is no point in stalling…and then I’ll tell my parents this weekend, after Penny’s Halloween party.”

Beatrice was glad that Evelyn seemed a lot better, her pose was straighter and her eyes were no longer dull and void of any emotion. She was still nervous, but there was a hint of confidence within her brown irises.

After chatting for a few more minutes, Beatrice decided to take her leave. Evelyn hugged her by the door, squeezing her friend’s shoulders, “Thank you.”

“You are welcome,Ev.” she smiles, pulling back from the hug to step towards the elevator, “See you Saturday?”

“Yeah, sure, oh.” she calls Beatrice’s name when the brunette reaches the elevator’s doors, “Please don’t tell Shells, we both know how she was when you were pregnant with Nikki.” the brunette laughs gently but nods, waiting for the doors to open, “And please don’t tell Rooster yet.”

That would be a bit hard considering how her husband was, “...will do.” she says after a while, waving goodbye to Evelyn as she steps into the elevator.

[deadcactuswalking]

REVIEWING THE CHARTS: 09/11/2024 (The Weeknd & Anitta, Tyler the Creator)

Gracie Abrams snabs her first UK #1 this week with “That’s So True”, which just two weeks ago debuted at #19 and is now, thanks to special discounted sales, topping the chart, usurping Gigi Perez’s “Sailor Song” after just one week. As for what’s below, we have a cooler week so welcome back to REVIEWING THE CHARTS!

content warning: language, references to sex, weapons, daddy issues and prostitution

Rundown

As always, we start the episode with our notable dropouts, those being songs exiting the UK Top 75, which is what I cover, after five weeks in the region or a peak in the top 40. This week, we bid adieu to not only all of the Halloween tracks, which aren’t really worth listing – you know them all by now and they’ll be back last week next year – but also a set of duos: Liam Payne’s solo cuts, “For You” (Fifty Shades Freed) with Rita Ora and “Strip that Down” featuring Quavo, two tracks falling victim to arbitrary UK chart rules: “Noid” by Tyler, the Creator and “Pink Pony Club” by Chappell Roan, more on those later, and Coldplay having both “WE PRAY” with Little Simz, Burna Boy, Elyanna and TINI and “feelslikeimfallinginlove” drop off this week. Other than that, we say our farewells to “Mantra” by JENNIE and “You & Me” by Disclosure featuring Eliza Doolittle: a lot of good songs making their exits this week, sadly.

Now, what’s making up for all that? We have a few gains and four strong new entries to pick through later in the episode. As for our returns… well, it’s a slow week in November, meaning we begin our annual thawing of Christmas music, starting with “Last Christmas” by Wham! at #61 and “All I Want for Christmas is You” by Mariah Carey at #58. From this point on, these episodes may be shorter and forcedly more festive. We also see a spike in older tracks returning once again, amidst some newer tracks, with the list as follows: “Dreams” by Fleetwood Mac at #75, “Belong Together” by Mark Ambor at #72, “Yellow” by Coldplay at #71, “Scared to Start” by Michael Marcagi at #70, “Iris” by the Goo Goo Dolls at #68, “Mr. Brightside” by The Killers at #67, “NEW DROP” by Don Toliver at #64 and perhaps most notably, “labour” by indie-folk one-hit-wonder Paris Paloma at #62. It peaked at #29 in 2023 the same week Ed Sheeran’s “Eyes Closed” debuted at #1, and due in part to its feminist themes, as well as fitting a wave of more emotionally open folk-pop from women on the charts, it has had a resurgence that I can’t really complain about – I didn’t remember the song but on relisten, I still like it, perhaps more than I did back then. Turns out in my old review for it that I almost predicted a similar trend to what is actually happening on the charts right now with a larger focus on organic, 2010s-resembling indie and folk-pop having a larger moment. Maybe I don’t always bullshit my way through these episodes – and, hey, she still has the time to launch a second track on the charts, it’s an opportune time for her.

There are some noteworthy gains here too, many of which have also been here a while, such as “Riptide” by Vance Joy at #65, unfortunately, “Slow it Down” by Benson Boone at #60, “The Days” by Chrystal at #55, “The Sound of Silence” by Disturbed at #54, “What Makes You Beautiful” by One Direction at #53, “I Only Smoke When I Drink” by nimino at #52, “TOO COOL TO BE CARELESS” by PAWSA at #51, “Burning Down” by Alex Warren at #50, “Heavy is the Crown” by Linkin Park at #49, “Don’t Dream it’s Over” by Crowded House at #48, “I Had Some Help” by Post Malone and Morgan Wallen at #46, “Austin (Boots Stop Workin’)” by Dasha at 42, “Close to You” by Gracie Abrams at #41 (she’s really having a moment right now and it’s beyond me as to why), then “Stargazing” by Myles Smith at #29, “The Emptinesss Machine” by Linkin Park at #28, “Lose Control” by Teddy Swims at #26, “A Bar Song (Tipsy)” by Shaboozey at #25 – I will say that sometimes it’s disheartening to see so many long-term hits rebound just as there should be a winter shake-up. Not that the newer tracks are any fit to replace them, with “Timeless” by The Weeknd and Playboi Carti at #21, sigh, but also “Bad Dreams” by Teddy Swims at #15 as he grabs a second top 10 with “The Door” at #8, a song that has grown on me a lot since my review, and finally, just on the cusp of that region is Billie Eilish’s fantastic “WILDFLOWER” at #11, which I think will be able to make it there in the next few weeks.

In terms of our top five, we already know about Gracie and Gigi’s folk-pop songs switching places at #1, but we also see Chappell Roan hit a new peak with “HOT TO GO!” at #5 and there’s a woman playing at least co-lead on every track here, as Abrams’ “I Love You, I’m Sorry” sticks to #4 and “APT.” by ROSÉ and Bruno Mars is down to #3. I’m not sure if that’s a significant stat considering the political climate, but it’s something. You know what’s not… women?

New Entries

#69 – “One by One” – Central Cee

Produced by Cash Cobain

Okay, let’s get the needed waffle out of the way: this was initially promoted with the live performance on A COLORS SHOW, which genuinely has so little distinctly different from the official version that it may have just assumed that role instead. This beat samples Bryson Tiller’s 2015 track “For However Long”, which itself cribs from Jodeci’s “Alone” from back in 1993. Neither were released as singles, and both in eras where that actually mattered, so they never charted. What I most want to acknowledge in this is the top one slizzer, the Slizzy God, Cash Cobain, finally making his official dent on the top 75 after having influenced Jordan Adetunji’s “KEHLANI” earlier this year. As briefly discussed in the review for that, sexy drill, slizzy drill, whatever you wish to deem it, is a niche subgenre pioneered by Cash and surrounding artists like Chow Lee, PoWR Trav, wolfacejoeyy, etc. out of New York and taking a more melodic, R&B-sampling approach to that city’s burgeoning drill music. The lyrics are sexual, the vocals are dripping wet with meek Auto-Tune, and the beats have a certain constant underlying tension to them due to the drum patterns and mostly shoddy mixing. This year has been big for the genre thanks mostly to “KEHLANI” and, ahem, “Grippy”, and I’ve become somewhat of a scholar just because it’s a fun scene with often recognisable samples and funny lines or deliveries that creep up on you on multiple listens because they’re not immediately obvious or practically mumbled. I for one have been hypnotised by Cash Cobain’s debut solo album, PLAY CASH COBAIN, practically since release.

One thing Cench definitely isn’t is subtle or saying anything you won’t notice on first listen, given his crass delivery, but that perfectly fits with the shoddy bass master and chipmunk sample, and he leaves a similar amount of empty space, given the lack of ad-libs originating from the fact it was originally published as a live performance, so it functions perfectly fine as a sexy drill song, and is actually enhanced and made unique by Cench’s presence, as his lyrics actually have genuine attempts at multisyllabic rhymes and clever wordplay, unlike most slizzy drillers who rely on comically autopilot sex raps, not that this is a bad thing, but Cench is also just really funny here! He threatens those who are tweeting at him to log out of their account whilst also saying that he bought the PS4 and scented candles to his trap to help make it “homely” which is hilarious… though I guess Cench can’t even get a PS5. He seems to be slightly disdained, but not particularly, about not being able to watch Disney Channel but SPECIFICALLY The Suite Life of Zack & Cody – I question if that’s much of a loss – and that is all in the chorus. It does help that Cench’s flow, whilst mostly the same throughout, brings a typically British mouthful to a genre that is otherwise “less is more”, whilst still shouting out New York, as well as comparing himself to Jason Derulo and… Tyga, saying he had “young money”… I’m not sure if even he is aware of the other meaning there because I’m not sure he would have kept the lyric in otherwise. My favourite part of the whole song, which feels not like a mockery of the genre but him being very ridiculous over it, is when he starts the second verse by just listing the weapons he would own not only if he didn’t live in the UK, but in different time periods, because if he lived in the Stone Age, he would have had a spear. Great. Thanks, Cench. This is the kind of humour and unique production I found appealing before he started to succumb to the pressure of trends and virality, and I’m glad to see it back even if briefly. Let’s hope he locks in on the album.

#47 – “Casual” – Chappell Roan

Produced by Dan Nigro and Ryan Linvill

I’ve long been frustrated with not really connecting to Chappell Roan’s singles from The Rise and Fall of a Midwest Princess that have charted, often for small nitpicks of reasons that have to do with the production or structure not functioning as well as they could to uphold the strong writing and a narrative connection I often resonated with or appreciated to some degree. I’m glad that this one has actually been the one to click really well. That could be found in the lighthearted conceit of it all that speaks to deeper issues: the comical framing of her hanging with a potential romantic partner in a more platonic way and asking at what point during their sexual and more wholesome intimacy is it still a casual and not long-term relationship? That all gathers, through a droopy 80s synth and gated drums, a wave of distrust and disappointment about her girlfriend’s lack of commitment, and as the descriptions of sex get more intense and vivid, as well as the mental health sacrifices Chappell’s making for her girlfriend’s family get revealed, the longing turns into a hateful frustration, a bitterness that arises in large part to the expectations Chappell has coming into a relationship that she acknowledges aren’t only unfounded but perhaps unrealistic, shaming herself for them in the second verse for giving into “dumb love”. It has a more reasonable and less unlikeable bitterness than “Good Luck, Babe!”, no production issues that deweight its impact like “Red Wine Supernova” and the writing actually progresses quite sensationally towards the outro, unlike the somewhat muddled “Pink Pony Club”, so I think aside from the dumb fun of “HOT TO GO!”, this is the first of hers to really stick with me, and definitely elevates above that song, even if the core conceit isn’t too dissimilar. If I had one issue, it’s that I get too connected with the narrative that the effective, disappointed self-blame hits too close and makes me want to hear much more about how this relationship actually ends. If that’s not effective songwriting, I don’t know what it is.

#33 – “Like Him” – Tyler, the Creator featuring Lola Young

Produced by Tyler, the Creator

Out of all songs from CHROMAKOPIA to swap out “Noid” with, I did not expect the late-album ballad, if anything I assumed we’d see one of the bangers, like “Rah Tah Tah” or especially “Sticky” with Sexyy Red, GloRilla and Lil Wayne. I’m not complaining though, because this is one of the best songs of the year, it’s heartbreaking and I cannot do it justice. It’s not all doom and gloom, of course, as Tyler inserts some comedy in it as always, whether it be the “huh?” he slides in from what sounds like a shoddily-EQ’d Baby Keem sample but I stand corrected if he actually went in the studio to record a few sounds, or the intro, wherein Tyler’s mother Bonita compares Tyler to his father, setting up the “Like Him” theme but also listing every point of comparison on his body before she gets cut off. That kind of bittersweet, slight ironic humour comes with the familial territory the song otherwise works in, with the track acting as a bit of a plea to Bonita: if he’s so like him, why doesn’t he know who he is, or where he is? Where is Tyler’s father in his life? It’s a question that T has been struggling with for much of his career with constant references and some full songs directed to his absence like “Answer”, which is particularly potent in retrospect considering this song is full of questions.

Starting with sombre pianos and a frail high-register performance from Tyler, who sings for all of the track, it eventually develops into a progressive soul track backed by harmonies from British singer Lola Young and a gorgeous soaring guitar in the back and the detailed soundscape you should expect from one of Tyler’s slow jams, that fuzzy synth coating in particular contrasting with the breathless gasps that appear all across the album. You also have the chorus accentuated with what sounds like Bonita herself chiming in with “Like what?”, acknowledging the role she played with the absence of Tyler’s father, which is expanded upon firstly in the second verse, wherein Tyler croons directly to her, with a great pause before he delves into how everything worked out and there may even be a sense of guilt there that Tyler is still on the hopeless chase for something he never had and won’t ever need – hence all the empty gaps left in the production. It resonates particularly hard for me, not that I’m in this specific situation, but as someone without a father figure in adulthood, I can relate to the idea of having something inexplicably missing there that you just kind of have to fill in for yourself. The most potent point is that incredible bridge, wherein Tyler stops the question at simply, “Do I look?”, asking his mother whether it’s worthwhile searching for either his father or that part of him that’s missing due to his absence, before a glance of piano and a vacant hole failingly filled in by Baby Keem pre-empting a wraparound of synths climaxing the song with utter defiance. In his third, improvised-sounding verse, spent mostly in the mix as backing vocals, he half-raps about his devotion to his mother but simultaneously, the insistence that he doesn’t “look like him”, because he’s everything HE wanted himself to be, and even with how abrupt Lola Young’s belting ends, you still get the time to chew on that dynamic… before that crushing outro, a home recording of his mother apologising for her involvement in keeping Tyler’s father out of his life, a plea from her for forgiveness over an off-tune bass note and cascading keys that really tugs at the heartstrings as someone who’s followed Tyler’s career and knows just how common and meaningful this topic is to him. Hell, it even wraps up the closure Tyler desperately seeks on the album, and leads into another banger in “Balloon” that, in many ways, is a middle finger to what a father figure could have brought into his life, that being restriction, tradition and hypermasculinity. Once again, it’s a brilliant song from a brilliant album, I wouldn’t be surprised if we get yet another switcheroo but I’d be delighted to have this one stick around. It is a wonder of a song.

#22 – “São Paulo” – The Weeknd and Anitta

Produced by The Weeknd, MIKE DEAN and Sean Solymar

Named after the Brazilian city that he premiered the track in, this new single with co-star Anitta, a massive singer in her own right in Latin America, is in some ways an embracing of Brazilian funk, which has been having a viral surge creeping up in the western world and having major influence on western artists now after years of it soundtracking the country’s cities. This song in particular is probably the widest western audience funk mandelão will ever get, and it’s not compromising either! It’s not as minimal as what you may hear from the genre, but it’s got the raw aggression of the rough cheap synths and the bass-heavy rumble manned by an oddly-mixed Anitta who, despite the genre being so in your face, feels about as far away from the party as possible even when you translate her stuttering, Auto-Tuned chanting to English and realise just how filthy it is. In fact, that’s my main problem with the song: as much as it embraces the genre, it seems way too distant as an overall piece from the actual fun, and sexiness, that this genre could be used for, with Abel on a murmuring autopilot once again – he sounds so sick of even opening his mouth this whole album cycle so far – and drenched in a reverb that echoes him out of the immediacy this production needs, with his sexual lyrics not prompting anything all too interesting either.

I like the chaotic sample brought in to an almost off-beat bridge but that all leads to what should be a promising second half… and ends up just trailing off. The Weeknd somehow ends up both robotic and out-of-breath – I’m not accusing it of being AI because it absolutely sounds human, but that’s also how I would describe what happens when you filter high-pitch vocals through AI and it gets all glitched out, losing breath, life and also clarity like Abel does here. I do enjoy the sly reference of the prostitute being “desensitised with money” and him needing to pay for his pleasure with work of his own, but outside of a burst into a drop that fails to really make much impact thanks to MIKE DEAN’s wankery souring the party, I’m unsure to what point any of the song’s second half serves that the first didn’t. It’s not the worst of his singles from this album so far, but it’s the one that tests your patience the most and honestly shows the most frustrating potential. Sadly, trying isn’t exactly on the agenda for the team behind this final album, and I hope the album gives me at least something to latch onto, unless, and I fear I might be correct, this is part of a narrative that involves losing interest in the “Weeknd” persona and shedding that baggage away. I suppose we’ll just have to see.

Conclusion

I suppose it has to get Worst of the Week, given that it’s the only dent on an otherwise above-average set of tracks this week, though Tyler, the Creator still blasts them all out of the water so he grabs Best of the Week easily with “Like Him” featuring Lola Young. As for the Honourable Mention, choose your gender, and as for what’s on the horizon… I don’t know, JLS? Who cares? Thank you for reading, rest in peace to Nipsey Hussle, and I’ll see you next week!

[bitchinbarzal]

Prompt Night

rules are the same as usual: when sending in a prompt please put the whole prompt and not just the number or your request will be deleted no questions asked! 🧁

you may request for au’s or anyone I write for, this list can be found here

prompts:

2. "Don't play with me."

3. "Please stay."

4. "I need you."

5. "I don't need you."

6. "Don't leave me."

7. "Forget me."

8. "I feel nothing."

9. "No, don't go."

10. "Don't ignore me."

11. "I've always been alone."

12. "Please stop."

13. "Tell me the truth."

14. "Don't do this to me."

15. "I need space."

16. "Move on."

17. "Please, listen to me."

18. "You can't leave me."

19. "I don't want this."

20. "It's not your choice."

21. "We're done."

22. "I can't lose you."

23. "Don't say that."

24. Why are you doing this?"

25. "You scare me."

26. "When did we stop trying?"

27. "Hold me, please?"

28. "Can we get through this?"

29. "Why did all have to end?"

30. "Are you going to be okay?"

31. "Will this change things between us?"

32. "Have you ever loved someone before?"

33. "When will it finally stop?"

34. "Can you even imagine the pain I felt?"

35. "Why did it have to be me?"

36. "How can you act like nothing happened?"

37. "When will I see you again?"

38. "Why don't you just leave me alone?"

39. "Can you look me in the eyes and tell me?"

40. "When did we lose ourselves?"

41. "Did you ever think about telling me the truth?"

42. "Was she worth all of this?"

43. "And now what?"

44. "How can we change what already happened?"

45. "Why can't we just stay here forever?"

46. "I see that you moved on."

47. "Do not touch me!"

48. "So, this is it, I guess?"

49. "I thought I could trust you."

50. "You were my family."

51. "This is not something that can be fixed by simply wishing it away."

52. "I had to see this for myself. To know it's true."

53. "Are you sure you want to go there?"

54. "I don't want to talk about it anymore."

55. "We tried, but it just didn't work out."

56. "So, this was all it was to you?"

57. "It was probably never meant to last."

58. "Don't say this right now, when you couldn't say it before."

59. "Maybe we have to accept the inevitable."

60. "There need to be two people willing to fix this."

61. "I never thought it could end up like this."

62. "Was any of this real?"

63. "I hope it was worth it."

64. "You deserved better, but so did I."

65. "There is nothing else to say, I guess."

66. "Maybe I am a little bit jealous. But who wouldn't be?"

67. "Does he not know that we're together?"

68. "Please, go with them if you like them so much better."

69. "You're naive if you think he just wants to be your friend."

70. "He shouldn't go after other people's girlfriends!"

71. "I'm not jealous, I'm being absolutely reasonable."

72. "Have you even told him about me?"

73. "Jealous? Me? Pff. Never."

74. "I never would have thought l'd ever be jealous about that."

75. "People are staring at us." "Well, let's make them jealous."

76. "Jealousy doesn't suit you. I like to see you smile more."

77. "Hey, look at me. I'm yours and no one can change that."

78. "Oh, so they are just a friend, right? That's what you're telling me?"

79. "I don't like them all looking at you."
80. "What would I be jealous about?"

81. "Maybe you should back off a little."

82. "I just want to have a good time, I don't need your jealousy all night."

83. 
"Why do you insist on flaunting him in my face?"

84. "This is your work place, leave the boyfriend at home next time."

85. "Why would I ever be jealous of someone like them?"

86. "He's so obvious. It's embarrassing."

87. "Do you want to make me jealous?"

88. "I can't understand what you would see in them."

89. "Are you jealous?" "No, I'm not!" "Oh, you really are jealous! Wait, why would you be jealous?"

90. "Can you please stop being so jealous for one second?"

91. "I trust you, I just don't trust them."

92. "Jealousy is not a word l'm familiar with.

93. "You just left." "Yes. That was an asshole move, I'm sorry."

94. "It's your weekend with the dog, so I hope he doesn't come back again fully covered in dirt, like last time."

95. It shouldn't be this awkward. Their break-up had been a mutual agreement and they thought they were both content with it. But it was awkward seeing each other again.

96. "Who is that?" "Unfortunately my ex."

97. "What have you done?" "I may have called my ex.
And texted them. And I think I even sent an e-mail."


98. "I will never give you alcohol again."

99. Was it a good idea to hook up with your ex? No.
Were they still going to do it? Absolutely.

100. Working with a partner can be great. Working with an ex partner can be a nightmare.

101. "You're still wearing the necklace I gave you."

102. "Do you think that there is still a small, really tiny chance for us?"

103. "I'm sorry for how it ended." "I'm sorry that it ended at all."

104. "Do you still have place for me in your life?"

105. "Three years was not enough to get over you."

106. "I couldn't stop loving you, even if I tried. And I did try for some time. But it didn't work."

107. "Seeing you again brought everything back."

108. "It was a mistake to just go away. We should've fought more for what we wanted." "We are doing it now."

109. "Do you have any idea how much I wished to take it back? To just go to your house and apologize?"

110. "I would have waited for you. I did wait for you. Even if it took some time, you are here now."

111. "I shouldn't have ever let you go away. I need you by my side."

112. "The fight we had was so stupid and breaking up was irrational."

113. "We work much better as a team."

114. "It was the right thing at the time. We weren't ready for it." "Do you think we are now?" "Yes, absolutely."

115. "People called me crazy for letting you get away.
And they were right."

116. "We were both so hurt that we didn't see how”

117. "You never supported me in the way I would expect a friend to support me!"

118. "I didn't think it would be such a big deal for you." "Of course, it's a big deal for me and I told you that over and over again!"

119. "You don't believe in me and I just can't live with that."

120. "I would want you to live your dreams, but I just don't think it's realistic." "A dream doesn't have to be realistic!"

121. "I would've never thought it would ever come to this, but I don't see us fixing this mess."

122. "I should've supported you. No matter what."

123. "Fighting with you was horrible. I don't ever want to live life without you."

124. "I'm glad to see you living your dream. I'm sorry I ever doubted you."

125. "Nothing makes me more happy than being able to talk to you again. I missed this so much."

126. "It was stupid. I was being stupid. And I'm so sorry for that."

127. "I bet you wont even get one point against me."
"Oh, are you challenging me?"

128. "That's not even a real sport." I will show you that it definitely is!"

all prompts from @creativepromptsforwriting 💘