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mel-the-fangirl · 4 years ago

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Toss A Coin to Your Witcher (Part Three)

Henry Cavill x Reader

Words: 4,365

(Part 1, Part 2)

Happy Holidays, Cavillry! I really truly hope that you all had some socially distanced fun! Here’s a little gift from me to everyone. I really hope everyone enjoys this last part to this miniseries as much as I enjoyed writing them!

Warning: I have never written anything even remotely close to smut and this story gets a teeny bit smutty so please be gentle with me.

Please like and reblog or leave some replies if you liked it!

Taglist: @novareign1, @libbymouse, @calwitch, @soldade, @happiness-in-the-dark, @seriouslygoodlookinggents, @wolvesandhoundshowltogether, @zealoushoundrancheclipse, @seanh-boredom, @speakerforthedead0, @rn7rocks, @writingforhenry, @weallhaveadestiny, @suueeeeeee

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“Because. We kissed."

Kissed.

Did you hear him right? Did he just say you kissed? You two kissed? And you didn't remember?

Just the thought of it made you dissolve into fits of uncontrollable laughter.

A valiant effort on his part, truly. He really looked frustrated and confused that you didn't remember. What a brilliant actor.

"Phew!" you brushed the tears from the sides of your eyes and rubbed your nose with the back of your hand

"Right! As if I would ever forget kissing someone like you.” you gestured to him from head to toe, “Specimen.”

“Alright,” he crossed his muscular arms against his equally muscular chest, “I am one hundred and ten percent sure it was you and I’m not about to let you change my mind, madame.”

The challenge was clear in his voice and honestly? It was really hot, his whole stern and smug vibe actually made you forget that you were trying to defend your honour.

How could he just look like that? All tall and handsome and muscular? It threw you off your game. He looked like he was God's favourite.

"Aren’t we going to dinner?" you asked, now openly staring at his eyes

"Oh, god. Of course, you must be starving. I apologise." he dropped his proud stance and immediately grabbed your coat from the rack

Henry graciously helped you put it on, his arms lingered around you just a tad bit longer than needed but it was all very good.

Something must have caught his eye as he stepped away from you. He gave you a small smile and made a move to lean in.

Oh, was this happening now?

Okay, sure. What the hell right? Since he claims to have already kissed you before maybe he needed to be reminded.

You could do that. You knew how to kiss, you’ve kissed people before.

As he leaned in, the smell of his cologne invaded your senses. It was musky but also floral. Combined with his naturally clean, fresh scent, you could just picture yourself on a leisurely stroll with him in a field somewhere, the pristine air carrying the scent of earthy wood and spring flowers all around you. Henry would be gazing at you adoringly and he’d be in a soaked white shirt even though it was a sunny day.

Armed with that picture in your mind, nothing could go wrong. You were definitely feeling it.

You tilted your chin upwards, leaning in to meet him halfway, more than ready to feel those luscious lips on yours. You shut your eyes, just to make it more romantic.

His arms wrapped around you and you went in for the kill.

That’s when the worst possible thing happened. Well, perhaps not the worst thing but this was pretty fucking close.

Instead of the soft lips you were expecting, your lips met the soft material of his sweater.

Yes, that’s right. His sweater.

You, Y/N Y/LN, had just planted a big ol’ smooch on Henry Cavill’s sweater.

Your eyes snapped open and you wondered what you did so wrong in your past life to deserve this. How could you have misjudged the situation so wrongly?

The second Henry felt the tiny amount of pressure on his shoulder, he knew he fucked up. He had no idea why he didn’t just tell you that the collar of your coat was sticking up, why did he feel the need to straighten it himself? Now, what was he going to do? He didn’t want to embarrass you.

But, it was a little too late for that now, wasn’t it?

You both stepped away at the same time, seeming to look at anything else in the room but each other. It was nice of him to also feel embarrassed on your behalf but, you felt like everyone the world over was cringing out of their skin from secondhand embarrassment.

“So, dinner?” Henry offered you his strong arm, grinning at you like nothing happened

Was it possible for him to be even more perfect? As you looped your arm through his, you found out that it was.

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The expansive cityscape was laid out before you from the secluded trellis covered terrace of the restaurant he chose. The view was beautiful, the lights of the city sprinkled across buildings, homes, and streets, the inky black and blue sky stretching far beyond.

Gazing out at it should have made you feel calm, at peace. But you were a bundle of nerves. Never in your wildest dreams did you ever think that you’d be on a date with Henry Cavill and you wouldn’t have imagined that he would be accusing you of forgetting that you shared a kiss.

“Look,” you rested your arms on the table, looking at him as seriously as you could without getting lost in his eyes, “I swear, if we really did kiss, I would remember.”

Henry studied you quietly amidst the hustle and bustle of the restaurant beyond the French doors. It was endearing to him, how quickly you would sometimes switch from confident assertiveness to awkward fumbling.

For you, it was a test of endurance to look past the god-given good looks and focus on trying to anticipate what his next move was.

Turns out, it was one in your favour.

“You know what? I think you’re right.”

You almost did a spit take with your wine. Thank God you weren’t wearing anything white.

Okay, act cool. That should be easy, right? You were an actor after all. Just be cool. Relax your shoulders, unclench your jaw, stop sweating.

"I must've been mistaken. I truly apologise."

He looked so sheepish, you actually reached over to put your hand on his. You tilted your head and gave him an understanding smile. A wave of relief washed over your body and to Henry, it showed. Your rigid posture finally loosened and you even managed to lace your fingers through his.

"I totally get it. I mean, with our jobs? We meet dozens of people everyday, it's not hard to be confused."

His heart leapt into his throat at the contact, it felt like his entire arm was covered in live wires but he would endure it just to savour your hand in his.

"Let's focus on our date, yeah?"

"Yes, absolutely," you nodded enthusiastically, "Please. Tell me all about you."

"Oh, but I'd rather hear about you."

You were flattered, really. But just in case this was never going to happen again, you needed to get him talking and sponge up as much information as you could.

"And you will, but let’s hear about you first.”

He wanted to argue but you were already looking at him expectantly and despite your short time together, he was already struggling to say no to you.

So, he talked, and talked, and talked, much more than he’s ever dared to talk in his whole life. And you listened, absolutely captivated by his eloquence, his intelligence, his passion, and his wit. Not to mention his voice, deep and silky and hypnotising. Why people thought he lacked personality was a mystery to you.

“I do love theatre,” he explained with a mouthful pasta. It was adorable, no questions asked. “I wish I had that courage and longevity to just deliver every single night for months on end.”

“I actually started out in theatre.” you nodded your head as he widened his eyes at you questioningly. “Yup. I did a decent run of The Tempest at the Yard a year back.”

That’s when the ball dropped. Time seemed to stop for Henry, his drink hovered in the air just as he was about to raise it to his lips. It had finally made itself known, his smoking gun. He faltered only for a second before masking his triumphant smirk with his wine glass.

One harmless little question out of his mouth had you turning as red as the cherry tomatoes artfully scattered in the salad that was set before you.

“Ah, yes. Didn’t you play Miranda?”

You stopped stirring your iced tea and furrowed a brow at him.

“Yes. Yes, I was. Did you catch a show?”

“I did. I was at the opening night after party as well.” he enunciated this part slowly and clearly, hoping that your eyes would spark with recognition

But they didn’t.

“Isn’t that a shame. We could have done this earlier if we crossed paths that night.”

Henry pursed his lips and nodded, mildly disheartened but nonetheless, he pressed on.

“I do recall meeting you though.”

This again?

You huffed and set your utensils on your plate. You laced your fingers together and looked him in his gorgeous ocean coloured eyes.

“Okay. If that is the night in question then I will admit that I… may have kissed someone but it wasn’t you.”

“Well, well, well…” he raised an eyebrow at you and you instantly coloured

It wasn’t one of your finest moments and you figured you would never have to dig that memory out of the vault but here it was.

“I know how this sounds,” you shook your head disapprovingly at him, “But it’s not. Okay. On God, it wasn’t you.”

Henry nodded yet again, narrowing his eyes at you. The silent treatment and judgy look he had on forced you to keep talking, which probably wasn’t the best idea.

“It wasn’t you, Henry. Okay? It was just some random dude in a nice sweater and a signet ring or something.”

Alarm bells started clanging in your head as your eyes swept over your dinner date. Nice sweater, check. A signet ring resting on his pinky, check.

“It wasn’t you.” you repeated in more of a whisper, more to convince yourself than anything else

Throughout your debate, bits and pieces of that night started to come back to you. The most embarrassing part came to mind first, it would probably be your saving grace but, did you really want to tell Henry Cavill what you thought you did?

“Am I really that bad a kisser? That you felt the need to completely erase it from your memory?”

His tone was joking but you could see in his eyes that he was a little bit hurt. It was going to be a cold day in hell if you were going to be the person to make Henry Cavill doubt his skills in the kissing area.

“I kissed a male prostitute that night, okay!” you yelled out in exasperation

Thank God your table was situated on the terrace or else a restaurant full of people would have been in on your little secret. As your voice echoed off the walls, you wrapped your arms tightly around yourself. How much embarrassment were you going to endure?

“A male prostitute?” Henry repeated slowly, clearly having a difficult time processing this new information

“Yes.” you groaned, leaning back in your seat and covering your face with your hands

---One year before---

The curtains closed to thunderous applause, whistles and standing ovations. Your heart pounded in your chest as you struggled to keep your breathing steady.

Did that really just happen?

You looked around at your castmates and wrangled them into a group hug.

“Did I really just do that?” you asked Marge upon meeting her backstage

“Yes, you did! Now go on and get changed. It’s after party time.”

With that, she sent you off with a smack on your ass.

You’d only known Marge for a few months since you arrived in London but you liked her already. It’s not like you had a choice though, really, she was the only one you knew.

“How about that one, that one over there?” Marge slurred, shoulders knocking into yours, less than discreetly pointing out some guy in the crowd of party goers

“Shh! Marge!” you giggled, more than a little tipsy yourself

Opening night was a smashing success, it was your first ever gig anywhere, really. You were so nervous the entire time, you thought you were doomed to fuck up and forget your lines or something but that moment never came.

“HEY! REVIEWS ARE OUT!” someone yelled in the crowd

“Here we go.” you murmured, knocking back your drink and tugging Marge along

The huge crowd gathered around your director, who was standing on a stool. It was a tight squeeze since a good chunk of the people who came were already hammered. Someone from behind shoved you forward and you rather inelegantly fell into the arms of the man next to you.

“Whoa there.” you could just make out the deep velvety voice above the murmurings of the crowd

“Oh, God, I am so sorry, I-” you trailed off when you finally laid eyes on your rescuer

Oh, wow.

You couldn’t decide which feature to focus on first. The captivating eyes that were a shade of blue that your alcohol-soaked brain couldn’t even comprehend, the strong chiseled jawline you needed a protractor to measure, or the perfect stray curls that fell onto his forehead?

Decisions, decisions.

“Are you alright? You almost fell.”

Goosebumps broke out on your arms as he helped you stand upright.

God, he was handsome, an observation you thought you had kept to yourself.

The tall man chuckled, still holding on to your forearms, “Thanks very much. I’m He-”

“And Y/N, my incomparable Miranda!” a booming voice interrupted him from the front of the room

“Fuck, that’s me.”

You broke from his grasp and fought your way through the crowds, leaving your hero looking out after you.

“Newcomer Y/N Y/L/N’s performance as Miranda is the glittering centrepiece to this refreshing, masterful take on an enduring classic,” the director read aloud, allowing the crowd to raise their glasses to you

You smiled at everyone, inadvertently meeting the eye of your tall handsome man.

When the crowd dispersed, you and Marge found yourselves back at the open bar, eyeing up every guy that passed by.

“Y/N, you’re on the fast track now. You killed tonight, now it’s time to pick your prize! How about that one? In the corner? Looks tall, shaggy hair…”

“Marge, that’s a ficus.”

“Huh.”

“Yeah.”

“Well, that other ficus has been looking over since we set up camp here.”

You followed the tilt of her head to the same guy from earlier, the achingly handsome one. He raised his glass to you and you waved sloppily back. It was the alcohol, okay? Open bar, what were you gonna do?

Marge whistled low, sizing him up from head to toe, “Y/N, that’s a male prostitute if I’ve ever seen one and I have seen a lot of ones.”

The fry you had chomped down barely made it halfway down your throat before coming back up again, “What? No! Marge, he’s not.”

“But he is. Y/N, that man is tall, hung, and handsome. There is no man that tall, hung, and handsome that isn’t either an actor or a male prostitute.”

“Tall, hung, and handsome.” you mumbled, raking your eyes over him as discreetly as you could

In your inebriated state, you completely forgot to ask Marge why he couldn’t have been an actor. Why did her mind immediately head for the strip club? And why did yours follow suit?

“Imma go and bag myself a stripper, Marge. Okay?”

“Yes! Use protection!”

Before strutting off or more like stumbling off, you downed some more booze which probably was not as good of an idea than you thought. Not even halfway to him, you decided that you were teetering in your heels a little bit too much, so you took them off.

“Oh. Hey there.” the same silky smooth voice from earlier greeted you

“Ah, fuck. You’re tall.”

Looking up at him made you dizzy, like standing at the top of a giant skyscraper and looking down at the very edge.

He chuckled and you watched entranced as his face just lit up like Christmas. You decided then and there that you would like to kiss the Christmas, very much so indeed.

The liquid courage in you was really doing its job. You took his hand and dragged him away from the party. This was fine, wasn’t it? It’s not like he was complaining, he looked rather amused actually. Things like this probably happen to him a lot in his line of work.

“Well, now you have me, what are you going to do with me?” he asked teasingly once you two were tucked away in a dark corner

The combined effects of the excessive alcohol, the high of your first successful job, and the way this sinfully handsome man was looking at you made your next move the easiest thing in the world.

You balled the front of his sweater in your fist and tugged him down towards you. He was too tall.

Who on earth was this ballsy, clumsy, beautiful, talented stranger?

Henry didn’t get the chance to ask before his lips came crashing down and immediately, wildfire.

A shockwave of frenzy ran through his body, he needed to feel you. He was all hands and lips and ragged breaths. His lips traveled down the smooth path of your throat, nipping and sucking as he went. You were putty in his hands.

“Jump.” he growled

You did as he asked and he latched his hands underneath your thighs and planted you against the wall. His lower half pressed into yours and you knew that Marge was right. Your hands raked through his hair and you reveled in the feel of him, strong, confident, in charge. His large hands made their way to your bottom and he squeezed gently.

A breathy moan escaped your lips and you knew you needed to have more of this man. Your fumbling hands made their way to his belt buckle but he set you down on your feet and held you steady.

“What..?” you whispered, suddenly disoriented

“I really should take you on a date first.” he panted

Sober, you definitely would have taken him up on his offer, male prostitute or not, but you were far from it and your head was still spinning so you thought you’d shut your eyes for a while and have him catch your unconscious form.

With you over his shoulder and your shoes in one hand, Henry made his way to his car and drove you safely home, relying on the satnav and your slurred directions.

He laid you gently in bed, brushing the hair away from your face. You snored in your drunken sleep and Henry smiled at the sound.

This was an encounter he was sure he would remember for a long time.

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“Well, that was me,” Henry nodded his head with his bottom lip jutted out. “Exactly as you remembered it.”

Tall, hung, and handsome, huh? That wasn’t anything new to him. He’s been described using far more… graphic detail, if his time searching his name on Tumblr was anything to go by. But hearing it come from your mouth turned him several shades of red.

You, on the other hand, had no words. Again. But you figured that it was all Marge’s fault.

“So, I suppose I was right?” he confirmed, unable to contain the self-satisfied smirk on his face

“Uh, yeah,” you sighed, absolutely exhausted from your little trip down memory lane. “Yeah, I guess you were right.”

Slowly, you met each other’s eyes. A moment passed before you both dissolved into fits of laughter.

“Do I look like a male prostitute? Did I exude that kind of energy at the time?” Henry guffawed, shoulders shaking

“God, I don’t even know how I thought that! I was super drunk, okay?” you covered your face with your hands, mortified and extremely amused at yourself

The laughter died down and you were left gazing at each other fondly. Dessert had long since been over and the night went on, the candlelights on your table and scattered around the quiet terrace intensified the feeling that was passing between you.

“Y/N?”

“Yes?”

You didn’t miss the way his eyes darkened and settled on your lips. Unlike all the other times today, you didn’t feel nervous, you didn’t feel like you were about to make a fool of yourself, you felt completely calm.

“Would it be alright with you if we picked up where we left off that night?”

Ever the gentleman. You smiled and made your way over to him.

“Hi.” you made yourself comfortable on his lap and you laced your arms around his neck

“Hello, there.” he whispered against your lips

It was probably not the best place to do this, in a restaurant where upwards of twenty people were just beyond the terrace doors but you were in your own little world.

You were endlessly thankful that you were sober for this, you would never forgive yourself otherwise.

When his lips finally met yours, you wondered how on earth you ever forgot such a feeling. It was gentle and soft, as most of these things start, his thumbs caressed that apple of your cheeks then he laid a chaste kiss on each.

You breathed long and hard as his hands splayed on your back, pushing you closer to him. His warm tongue traced the outline of your bottom lip before exploring your mouth, the taste of you mixed with the subtle taste of wine was exquisite and he wanted more. He drank you in, holding you flush against him.

“Wait.” you took his hand and led him to the far side of the terrace to an alcove enveloped in a curtain of lush vines

“When did you spot this?” Henry asked, breathless as you sat him down and straddled him once again

“On the way in.” you had the audacity to blush

“You had plans for me already?”

“A girl always comes prepared.”

Nothing would ever prepare you for the sight of his full length, once his trousers were lowered, it was over for you. Henry took control by shoving your underwear to the side and impaling you onto him. You inhaled sharply, screwing your eyes tightly shut.

“Are you okay?” he struggled to control himself, having you quivering on top of him was severely testing his restraint

“Yes. Please. Move.” all you could manage were monosyllabic answers

And move he did. It should be illegal to be this good.

The night air was cool but you were both slick with sweat, you two had lost your tops a while ago and Henry’s tongue swept across the valley of your breasts and marked his territory everywhere he could. His thrusts were enough to bruise you but you never wanted anything more than to feel him.

“Henry,” you gasped out as he continued to hit that spot that made you see stars

He could sense that you were close, you were tightening around him and gripping him like a vise.

“Let go, lovely.” he whispered in your ear, committing the way your face twisted into a mask of pleasure and desperation to memory

You rode him furiously, the sound of your flesh colliding over and over again mingled with your hoarse moans, you were certain that someone would hear you but at that moment all you cared about was reaching your peak and with Henry Cavill at the helm?

His large hand clamped around your mouth as you came, you writhed and arched your body uncontrollably as his thrusts became more erratic. He pulled out of you and began to finish himself off, he did not expect for your hand to join his and he did not expect to come so quickly once it did.

“Jesus.” he panted, reaching over to smooth your hair out of your face

You shivered, suddenly very aware that you weren't wearing anything at all. Henry helped you dress quickly and wrapped his own coat around you, rubbing some heat into your arms.

When you refused to look him in the eye the entire ride back to your flat, that’s when Henry started getting nervous.

It’s not like he could ask you if you enjoyed it? I mean, he could but that would make him look like an amateur and he would really like to think that he was no amateur in that area. So instead, he took your hand as you stood in front of your door.

“Y/N, I would love to do this again. The date, not the sex- I mean, I would like to have sex with you again but that's not what I'm after-Holy shit."

Oh, how the tables have turned.

Henry rubbed at his face with a hand and sighed, "Do you think you'd like to see me again?"

"Do you think you'd like to stay the night?"

Both of you asked your questions at the same time and you both looked taken aback at them.

"What makes you think I don't want to see you again?" you wrapped your arms around his torso and looked up at him

"You were silent the whole car ride?"

He looked so unsure and a little afraid that you couldn't help but squeeze him. How could someone be both heartbreakingly handsome and adorable all at the same time?

"I was just summoning up the courage to ask you to stay the night!"

"Oh thank God."

He swept you off your feet and threw your door open but, you didn’t end up in bed (you’d get there later), you ended up in the same place you started, on the couch, with him spectating and occasionally helping out as you played Witcher 3.

The next morning, you woke up to a text message and a forwarded article from Marge,

“HOW BEING A STAN GOT Y/N Y/L/N HER MAN”

YOU TWO ARE EVERYWHERE. CHECK IT OUT! I TAKE CASH, CHEQUES, AND LAVISH GIFTS. YOU’RE WELCOME.

A muscular arm gently wrapped around your bare waist and a tender kiss was pressed onto your shoulder. You looked back at your handsome bedfellow and smiled.

You’d take a look at it later. Right now, you had better things to do.

#henry cavill #henry cavill x reader #henry cavill imagine #henry cavill fic #Henry William Dalgliesh Cavill #geralt of rivia #the witcher #the man from uncle

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mishasminion360 · 4 years ago

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Crushed (Bonus Chapter)

Pairing: Javier Peña x Fem!Reader

Warning: Language

Notes: Okay, I just couldn’t resist writing one more chapter from Javi’s POV. Purely because I’m a sucker for pain and love writing sad shit. I hope you’ve enjoyed my little ficlets! If you haven’t already, be sure to check out Part 1, Part 2, and Part 3 before reading this one.

He was there when the call came in; one of the first to learn that 220 pounds of TNT inside a car had just turned the downtown Bogotá shopping district into a pile of ash.

He didn’t even wait for the higher ups to finish barking orders before he was running out the door, ahead of the troops. He didn’t need to wait for orders and he didn’t need directions. He knew that district by heart by now. Because he’d been to your apartment enough times to memorize the way there.

***

The mess wasn’t anything like Javi had imagined; had hoped for. It was much worse.

Bodies, and pieces of bodies, had been tossed about haphazardly in the wake of the blast; strewn about as chaotically as the rubble. He realized with a growing sense of dread that one of these corpses could be your own.

Working his way through the destruction, smoke filling his lungs, he dared to glance up at your apartment and his heart dropped to see that it was...gone. There’s nothing but a hole where walls and windows used to be. That home he’d come to know better than his own had been reduced to a fucking crater.

His pulse hammered in his ears and muted the world around him. The screams, the sirens, all far away now. Somewhere in the distance right beside him he could hear Steve yelling at him, trying to pull him back from the ledge before he fell headlong into a chasm of despair.

“She’s fine, Javi. She’s got to be. She might not have even been home. Whatever you’re thinking right now, just stop.”

Javier didn’t even turn to look at him as he responded. “You don’t know what I’m thinking. You couldn’t possibly know.”

He was already off and running before he’d finished the last sentence. Javi didn’t care that part of the building was still in flames, he didn’t care that it could collapse at any moment. All he cared about was you.

Javi took the steps, what was left of them anyway, two at a time on a perilous journey to your floor. There wasn’t much of that left either. Opening the door was another trial, and once he’d finally managed to jimmy his way inside he could see why. And it made his stomach roil.

The blast had blown everything, debris, furniture, to the front half of the apartment and the pile of wreckage had barricaded the door. Javi didn’t waste a single second climbing the mound of detritus, like the Dread Pirate Roberts scaling the Cliffs of Insanity.

He felt his lungs tighten from exertion and the excess inhalation of ash and dust, but he still found enough strength to scream your name as loud as he possibly could. He got only silence in return.

Javi started flipping over smoldering furniture and chunks of scorched rubble, praying softly to himself that he’d find you and that he wouldn’t. He dug and dug until he was soaked in sweat and his fingers were black with soot and red with blood.

He spotted your hand first, sticking out from beneath the splintered remains of your dining room table. The small, delicate extremity was abnormally pale, and not because of the layer of dust that coated it. He frantically removed the rest of the mess until he’d uncovered you, his buried treasure.

One of your arms and legs had each bent at an unnatural angle. Your skin was littered with cuts of different sizes and stained with bruises. Your hair was matted with blood. But it was your eyes that frightened Javi the most. They were wide open, but unseeing.

Javier knew better than to move you until paramedics arrived, but that didn’t stop him from trying to rouse you into the realm of wakefulness.

“Come on, baby, wake up,” he said, voice cracking as he framed your bloodied face in his hands and tried to force those empty eyes to look at him. “Don’t do this to me, baby. Please.”

He refused to leave your side for an instant, not even to spare a second to cross over to the gaping hole where your wall once was and shout down for help. So he just screamed again.

“Ayúdame!!” he roars. “I need help! Someone, please!!” He didn’t know if anyone was coming. He didn’t know if it’d make a difference. “AHORA!!!”

His throat was too raw to try again. Javi collapsed at your side clutching your hand in both of his, as if he could heal all your wounds himself the tighter he squeezed. If only life, or love worked liked that.

“Please....”

***

He’d always hated hospitals. There was something so unnatural about the sterility, and the fact that it served as a haven for healing felt like nothing more than an illusion. Javier knew what it really was. A place where people came to die. A place where you were currently bedded.

At first the nurses refused to let him in, not being a direct family member and all, but they quickly learned in frightening ways that nothing was going to keep Javier Peña from your side. If Steve hadn’t been there to watch his back, Javi was fairly certain he would have been arrested for assaulting a doctor. More than once.

Steve was the sensible, level headed one. He asked the docs all the questions, got all the answers. All Javi could do was stare at you. You looked almost alien to him wrapped in plaster and sprouting too many tubes and wires, but it was still you and he couldn’t look away. His deep brown eyes willed you to wake up.

From time to time he caught words from the doctor’s mouth, words like “skull fracture,” “extensive hemorrhaging,” and “cerebral and internal bleeding.”

“Can you fix it?” he thought he heard Steve ask.

“The damage she’s suffered is severe,” said a doctor who’s name Javier did not know and did not give a fuck to know. “We’ve stopped the bleeding for now, but until the swelling on her brain goes down she’ll more than likely remain comatose.”

The only thing Javier hated more than hearing the doctor spout his medical jargon was hearing his lame attempts to be comforting.

“These attacks are getting worse and worse in terms of casualties. It’s always a shame to see someone so young this badly broken,” said doc what’s-his-name. “Poor woman was in the wrong place at the wrong time.”

“Will she be okay?” The words left his mouth so softly that Javier wasn’t even sure he’d said them.

“As I said, the surgery was a complete success,” the doctor responded. “The rest is up to her.”

The doc had other patients, so he didn’t stick around. Steve offered to stay, but Javi told him to beat it. All Javi wanted was to be alone. Alone with his grief. Alone with his shame. Alone with his love.

His fingers stroked tender circles up and down your arm; he wondered if you could feel it.

“I’m here, baby,” he whispered. “I’m right here.”

***

Days turned to a week, and that week became two. Javi had taken up a steadfast vigil at your bedside. He’d become a permanent fixture in the room and no one could convince him to leave or, at the very least, sleep. He’d sleep when you woke.

The nurses tried to offer positive affirmations here and there and their saccharine sweetness almost made him sick.

“It won’t be long now, I’m sure of it,” one offered. “Just a matter of time until we see those pretty eyes of hers.”

“Her vitals are stabilizing. That’s a good sign,” said another.

They all reminded him to keep talking to you; that, even though you couldn’t respond, you could hear his every word. It wasn’t long ago that he would have killed to get you to stand still and listen to him. Now he finally had you all to himself, but it wasn’t in the way that he wanted. This was an awful way.

“Come back, corazón,” he pleaded silently. “Please.”

***

Soon the doctor was able to deliver a spot of good news: the swelling in your brain was gone and you were likely to regain consciousness soon. Javi tried to take the news for what it was, but knew he wouldn’t be able to officially breath a sigh of relief until you truly were awake and responsive.

“She’s going to have a long road ahead of her, though.” Ah, the good ol’ doc. Never one to sugarcoat shit. “Recovery will be difficult.”

“I’ll be there,” Javi said flatly. “Every step of the way.”

***

It was going on three weeks and you were still fast asleep. According to the doctor you were pretty much healed, internally anyway, but you just refused to come around. Stubborn as always.

Javi couldn’t remember the last time he’d slept himself. The last time he’d moved. He’d missed a shit ton of work, but he didn’t give a fuck. The world had stopped turning and it wouldn’t budge again until you returned to him.

Javier Peña was not a patient man. He’d never waited this long for anything in his life. But for you, he’d wait a lifetime. It felt like he already had. He’d spent so much of his life searching for something that he’d never been able to find. He wasn’t even sure what it was. Until he met you.

The second you walked into the office something shifted. You were like a breath of fresh air; an answer to all of his most burning questions. You awoke in him a feeling he’d long ago forgotten. He didn’t know yet if it was love or just desire, but he knew well enough that you were going to change everything.

But now, in that very moment, gazing longingly at your silent, slumbering form, he recalled the name of that feeling. In that moment he realized that you had made him whole. And it was at that moment he finally broke.

The tears came out of nowhere. His exhausted body was consumed by great, heaving sobs. Javi felt his throat constrict around a string of words that came unraveling from the very depths of his aching heart.

“Wake up, baby,” he begged. “Come back to me.”

He wept openly and loudly and didn’t give a fuck who heard or saw.

“Please, come back to me, please.”

He collapsed atop your supine body and cried the tears of a man shattered beyond repair.

“I’m right here,” he whispered. “I’m here.”

He repeated those words until, at long last, sleep overtook him.

***

“J-Javier...”

He was floating in a sea of darkness, blissfully lost in it when he heard the call. That very sound was enough to cause the inky blackness to evaporate and the world was suffused with light; a sunrise over the retreating black waves. And something inside Javier began to steer him toward wakefulness. Because he knew that sound. He’d heard it countless times in the waking world, and in his dreams. The most beautiful sound he’d ever heard. The voice of the woman he loved.

“Javi?”

The pull of the ocean receded, and he turned his face toward the sun.

@mamacitapascal @obsessivelysearching @grimeylady

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jacepens · 3 years ago

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1: HamilTurn(you can differentiate if needed) or MCU, 2: Washette, 3: Anna Strong

And generally a fandom list would be nice to know what to pick from ;) (Love you♡)

You said HamilTurn or MCU and I say both, I'm going to try my best haha. But anyway, thank you!:) Apologies in advance if this gets rambly, but that's the point of this right? Anyway, for ease of scrolling sake, I'll probably put a cut if this gets long but don't worry, it's just me talking a whole bunch lol. Ok, thank you again!! <3 (love you too!)

1. Hamilton/Turn (fandom)

Favorite character: I have to say Lafayette for both. Oh and Mary

Least favorite character: I have no real reason behind this so sorry but Burr, and Simcoe for many reasons

5 favorite ships: washette, lams, hamliza, benwash, whamilton

Character I find most attractive: ...all. But I have to say overall Brian Wiles as Lafayette. That face just…🥺

Character I would marry: Mary Woodhull or Eliza

Character I would be best friends with: you know I'm not sure, but in an ideal world Lafayette (both versions) or Ben but I feel like we wouldn't be best friends. But also everyone, is that an option? Even some of the "villains" would have good stories to tell

A random thought: I feel like most people in the fandom now are so new (they joined in with the movie release!) and unaware of the uh atrocities of back in the day. And y'all are lucky, but those of us who know. Know. (yes, I was unbearable but that's ok because I was having fun, and despite what I just said: have fun in your fandoms even if you're "unbearable", just keep it welcome to all and enjoy the enthusiasm you have for it:))

An unpopular opinion: Oh boy. Maybe stop making quick judgments about people based on what they write/who they ship? There is a line, but I've genuinely never seen it crossed by anyone at least openly sooo just let people have fun? And don't say anything about something? Unless it's actually harmful but even then, keep it to a dm or something and have an open discussion. Just let people vibe, please? Especially younger fans. Just, I’ve seen a weird amount of negativity towards them. They’re kids having fun, we all used to be like that so please, be kind and patient. They’ll learn if they make a mistake. Ok? Ok cool:) (maybe not unpopular but still I wanted to say it)

My canon OTP: Am I allowed to say lams?

My non-canon OTP: washette, wow, who would've guessed? xD

Most badass character: Mary my beloved

Most epic villain: Robert Rogers hands down

Pairing I am not a fan of: no one murder me, but in general I'm just not a fan of jamilton. also whatever was the deal with Anna and Abe

Characters I feel the writers screwed up (in one way or another): um. Where to begin? Honestly I think every woman in Turn at one point or another, except perhaps Peggy in my opinion. Oh but especially Anna. Also Simcoe. With Hamilton, probably again everyone at some point, but the way Angelica was written just feels so overwhelmingly fictional it bugs me. (But at least Hamilton had some genuine relationships between women, not great but still)

Favorite friendship(s): Ben and Caleb, Washington and Lafayette (what?? yes, you fools. lol). It may sound a tad ~cringey~ but I generally like Hamilton's vibe with the boys, maybe it's just the gender envy, but it's kinda cute and fun.

Character I most identify with: well jeez, I won't lie but Washington. In both versions, except god knows I could never be that chill. Also a dash of Laurens.

Character I wish I could be: wow what a loaded question ummm. I don't want to be like him, but I want to be like in his position so Hamilton lol. Playing an active role but I know personally I am not cut out for a battlefield, so a desk suits me well.

2. MCU (fandom-that I am so out of date from, please take all of this with a grain of salt)

Favorite character: so when I was younger it was Tony Stark but now it’s definitely Wanda and T’challa

Least favorite character: ummm. I genuinely couldn’t tell you, I’m very out of date

5 favorite ships (canon or non-canon): wandavision, …ngl I can’t think of anymore, I honestly never shipped many and wandavision was like the only couple I remember really liking. Oh, I don’t know them but Loki/Mobius and/or Sylvie

Character I find most attractive: embarrassing confession time, Loki was my first bad celebrity crush. Wanda now and Shuri is cute. Also Sylvie

Character I would marry: if I could, Wanda

Character I would be best friends with: Vision and Peter Parker

A random thought: y’all it’s been so long since I’ve touched MCU I should catch up/refresh shouldn’t I?

An unpopular opinion: I don’t know if this is an unpopular opinion but I’m going to say it anyway. Personally, I really don’t like the movie Civil War, I think it’s what sorta made me disinterested in mcu. It’s been years since I’ve watched it so maybe I would have a completely different opinion if I saw it today, but at the time it just felt so...wrong? And childish? I literally don’t even remember why they were fighting or how that movie even ended (I feel like it just wasn’t satisfying??) but I think also, as a kid or teen watching that, it reminded me sooo much of the dumb drama that, you know, kids get into. I mean, getting your friends on someone’s side like that?? Like, I know they were mad but- but there are other ways of dealing with emotions??? And involving everyone's friends too? So yeah, it just felt off to me at the time, and looking back now, from what I remember, it just frustrated me. Especially as a kid who deals with dumb drama like that all the time, kids would want to see a better example especially from adult superheroes or at least not be reminded of the bs they have to go through sometimes. But, rant over, that’s all just my opinion:)

My canon OTP: wandavision

My non-canon OTP: ummm. I guess just Loki/Mobius and/or Sylvie lol

Most badass character: I have to say Natasha but actually there are many

Most epic villain: when I was younger I liked that Ultron was voiced by Robert California from the Office lol

Pairing I am not a fan of: I don’t know if it’s popular but I never liked Tony and Pepper. What happened with her?

Characters I feel the writers screwed up: I guess I’ll say Thor because I just felt such a weird difference in his personality that did not make sense to me

Favorite friendship: Wanda and Pietro!! Honestly I think a lot, there were a lot of good friendships but I can’t think of which ones are my favorite

Character I most identify with: ummmmmm.

Character I wish I could be: My gut says Thor

3. Washette (ship-bless you<3 get ready for rambles oh no)

When I started shipping them: So I first had the thought in 7th grade while my history teacher was talking about them and my little brain went: haha that’s pretty gay. (teacher keeps talking about them) wait a fucking minute, that is pretty gay! But it wasn’t until I got sucked into Hamilton that I really started actively shipping them by reading fics and what not, but something about them became an instant favorite. And later (little personal story time) I pretty much completely stopped reading fic and being active in fandom for years and actually, when I got my first panic attack that - no joke - lasted for 5 hours, for some reason my brain (as it’s decaying lol) said I want to go and reread all my favorite washette fics and also do what I was I always too scared to do. Write!! So that night I binged the fics and found myself falling in love again, feeling all the old passion I had for them again, and the next night (still very shaken) I wrote an outline of a good ol washette confession + kiss that was extremely thoughtful and good, and honestly, I have not actually used that outline yet! Maybe I’m saving it. But yeah, this is a long answer, but I have a weird amount of attachment to them and this ship, I wish I knew why too. <3

My thoughts: so many. Too many. First of all, I love that I have so many versions of them in my mind, right? When I started writing, I had never watched Turn but then I did and then it was like: hell yeah, another washette set. At this point, my brain has created it’s own unique version of them but it’s like, they’re so versatile! That’s one neat thing about this fandom as a whole, we get more than one character and personality and that’s just fun right?! More specifically on washette I mean, they’re just so sweet. Historically, their relationship is unique and cute, and you’d have to be a fool to think that to Washington Lafayette was just another friend. Even strictly platonically, it was something special and it’s so obvious I just love them. Ok. Enough thoughts for now <3

What makes me happy about them: the loooove, the comfort they found in each other, the fact that like every person at the time documenting them knew and understood they were special to each other like, they were just that in love.

What makes me sad about them: oh so much that I try to ignore lol. There is the one year when Lafayette went to France and all his letters to Wash are like: “I have not received one letter from you, but it’s ok, I love you and I know you love me too :)” WHO WAS NOT DELIVERING THESE LETTERS, I HAVE NAMES, NOW I WANT ANSWERS. Anyway, also just most things that happened when Laf went back to France. And then when he visited America in 1824 and visited Washington’s grave. Yeah. ow. (also, you know what, I have done too much research on this event. lmk if you would like a post)

Things done in fanfic that annoy me: Generally, I’m not annoyed by much in fanfic at least with them and what I’ve seen. I’m still nostalgic for the old school nonbinary Laf fics, so it ain’t those. Literally maybe it’s because I’m starved for content but I can’t really think of anything, I love it all.

Things I look for in fanfic: back to the whole starved for content thing, I am a library of washette fics but I think if I was to pick a certain thing that I would love it’s just um fluff? And honesty, if that makes sense. Love confessions are very good as well. Canon era, please :) pining but not too much that it hurts me lol

My wishlist: literally all my wips. If I could whisk them into existence I could die happy and knowing I have put a variety of washette content in the world. Something else though, more fics :’) I love writing but sometimes I want to curl up with a cozy, new washette fic like a cup of hot chocolate and be surprised and learn something new and just..yeah:)

Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other: what. Ok but actually, Martha and Adrienne because they are both honestly perfect for them and I love them too (I’m going to be biased, especially Adrienne)

My happily ever after for them: Can Lafayette just move the family to America? But also, it’s sad, but like I know Laf would be sad in America while France suffers. So...maybe a world where things in France go better and Lafayette gets to visit Washington more often and bring the family!! (Washington visit France too??)

4. Anna Strong (character)

How I feel about this character: I like her! She’s fun and…strong (oops lol) and she’s made some mistakes sure, but I feel like she did her best to learn from them and move on

Any/all the people I ship romantically with this character: Honestly, I know they didn’t have a lot of interaction in the show but Anna/Mary has potential. And Anna/Edmund

My favorite non-romantic relationship for this character: her and Ben and Caleb

My unpopular opinion about this character: I really can’t think of anything unpopular

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon: in general, her having more screen time with less men you know? I mean like one-on-one kind of scenes. Also I would’ve liked to see at least her and Selah talk. Like, really talk. They never really did that, right? I just have so many questions about them

Favorite friendship for this character: Anna and Ben

My crossover ship: I have no idea

And well, I know it’s been a few days but for a fandom list, I’m just a weeb lol but here

Octopath Traveler (my beloved)

Fire Emblem: Three Houses

Star Wars

Natasha, Pierre and the Great Comet of 1812

Persona 4

Zelda (to a point)

Pokémon

What We Do in the Shadows

Sailor Moon

Literally anything historical

Ok!! I tried to add a lot because I’m not sure what you might know or not haha. But thank you again!! I had fun <3

#ask game

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quixotic-dragon · 4 years ago

Text

Kokichi Oma’s Crocodile Tears (MAJOR DRV3 SPOILERS)

Ah, good ol’ Kokichi Oma. The Ultimate Little Shit- and a controversial little shit at that! I’ve recently played v3, and Kokichi is the one character who always seems to be on my mind (aside from my fav, Keebo, of course) because he’s such a mystery. We never get to know what’s going on in his head, at least not openly, and many players are led to assume that he is a malicious troublemaker, or even an outright sadist.

I’m going to take a moment to analyze Kokichi specifically during that infamous scene at the end of Chapter 4 because that is all that’s been on my mind as of late.

Underneath the Keep reading, there WILL be major spoilers for the entirety of v3. There will also be a very long essay, but I will do my best to break it up so it is easier to read. Read at your own risk.

So without further ado, here is my analysis of and my thoughts on Kokichi, his actions, and his character circa Chapter 4:

INITIAL REACTION:

Before I go into how I feel about Kokichi now, I’m going to have a discussion about my thoughts on him while this scene was playing out. (I know my exact feelings because I was liveposting in a discord server as I played, haha)

At this point in the game, the player does not yet know that Kokichi is not the true mastermind, nor do they understand what Kokichi means by “winning” the game.

I had personally been spoiled of who the v3 mastermind was (thanks a lot danganronpa wiki), so I recognized that Kokichi wasn’t the mastermind, however I did not recognize that he was trying to win the killing game via unconventional methods. So from my point of view, Kokichi had just intentionally murdered Gonta (and Miu) just to increase his chances of winning and had the nerve to shed fake tears over it. I was furious! (behold, my fury!)

Kokichi sobs over Gonta’s death, and I interpreted this as entirely fake tears. One of my friends suggested, “i feel like there was a difference between like his / crocodile tears and this.”

I was enraged at this suggestion and stood beside my initial reaction because I felt that there were no signs that Kokichi never cared for Gonta as anything more than an asset, so I could not trust Kokichi to have any real remorse for his death with such a manipulative relationship having existed. (Massive disclaimer that this is my interpretation of their relationship; if you have a different interpretation, that is totally fine and valid!)

At this point, I considered why Kokichi might be crying so intensely even if it was an act, and came to the conclusion that if there was any sort of truth in those tears that Kokichi would be upset for a different reason than Gonta. He would be upset because he was truly alone. Not a single living person wanted to spare him the time of day besides Gonta. And now that Gonta is dead, nobody wants Kokichi. Even though I was fully convinced he was a sadistic, evil bastard at this point, I still figured that he must’ve felt some sort of sudden and crippling loneliness realizing that the only person who cared about him in the slightest was dead.

This interpretation of Kokichi I had really didn’t change much until after I had finished the entire game and stopped to think about Kokichi a bit more; his heartfelt final words to Kaito felt like lies to convince him to play along (blackmailing Maki certainly didn’t help with that much either), and his whole trick felt less like him trying to help and more like him just trying to cause chaos for the hell of it in my mind.

So, in conclusion, my initial reaction to the Kokichi scene? I thought Kokichi was a heartless bastard whose only remorse could be crippling loneliness. Although my initial analysis while I was still playing was quite interesting, I have some different opinions on it now that I’ve taken a step back and viewed the game as a whole.

KOKICHI ONLY WANTS YOU TO THINK HE’S EVIL:

Surprise! Kokichi isn’t a sadistic fuck! Crazy right?

Well, not really if you’ve watched/read any Kokichi analysis ever. However, Kokichi’s act seems to be a common thing that many casual players of v3 fall for. I certainly fell for it when I played, as you saw above!

It isn’t until far later in the game that it is revealed that Kokichi is the “supreme leader” of a pacifist prankster club (DICE), and it isn’t revealed until the end of Chapter 5 that Kokichi actually had good intentions in setting up his mastermind persona (although, as seen above, those good intentions are still very easily interpreted in a bad light).

So why does he bother to so obviously cry wolf at Gonta’s death just to double back on his persona ten-fold as soon as he’s called out on it? Because he’s just trying to sell his mastermind persona, not only to the other characters and the mastermind, but to the player themself. This is intended by both Kokichi and the writers themselves, made obvious by the fact that we get no real evidence of Kokichi being a benevolent person until long after this scene. (There are many moments in earlier chapters where Kokichi is trying to be helpful to the group or to a specific character, however every time he attempts this, it is painted in a negative light because he is either going against the protagonist’s will or achieving things in a more underhanded manner via lies or provocation).

When I saw Kokichi crying for Gonta, my first thoughts were, “I am going to THROTTLE this fucking BASTARD.” Because even if those tears were real, Kokichi was still the one fully responsible for Gonta’s death, so I felt that he had no right to shed tears over it. If it weren’t for Kokichi’s crying during this scene, I would have been very suspicious of how suddenly his evil villain act amped up. If he hadn’t shed tears that were so obviously fake, I would not have been nearly as enraged with him, and therefore not nearly as willing to just accept the fact: “Well. Guess he’s evil now.”

Whereas I would’ve chalked the scene without crying to bad writing, the viewers of the killing game, and by extent the mastermind, would garner suspicion towards his actions. Although Kokichi was not aware that Keebo had direct contact with the outside world, he was very aware that the killing game had to have been broadcasted to somewhere. He had to ensure that he was as convincing as possible; that meant no “bad writing” mistakes could be left anywhere.

I stand by what I said before in that Kokichi’s crying in this scene is just a bunch of crocodile tears. However, with new context and information surrounding the situation, they probably weren’t devoid of emotion. Kokichi only allowed himself to cry here in order to properly double back on his new mastermind persona, however, unlike what I believed before, he most likely did feel remorse at the deaths of Gonta and Miu. He just broke his last standing moral code: don’t murder people. And he broke it by indirectly causing the deaths of two people he may have considered to be his friends. That’s heavy stuff!

Kokichi is faking these reactions to the trial because he has to if he wants to deceive everybody. But... the best acting comes from the heart.

LONELINESS AND GUILT:

As I covered in my initial reaction to Kokichi’s breakdown, I felt as though he couldn’t possibly have any remorse for his actions, so he must have been devastated knowing that he would now be truly alone. This view was heavily influenced by Shuichi’s words after the trial... because they were true.

After Kokichi criticizes the group for coming to Kaito’s aid, Shuichi turns around and tells Kokichi that he is the pathetic one because he will always be alone. There are no lies to these words. Now that Gonta is dead, and now that Kokichi has gone so far into his persona, not a single person wants to even be near him.

Now that I’ve established that Kokichi’s actions post-trial were most definitely an act and not representative of his true feelings, we can discuss what his true feelings may have been. I come back to the idea of Kokichi fearing being alone because, hey! My past ignorant self was actually onto something!

The acknowledgement that Kokichi feels remorse for his actions just makes this situation even sadder for him; not only did he just indirectly murder two people and has to put up with the guilt of that, but now, nobody cares about him either. Not that anybody in the cast cared for him all that much in the first place (aside from Gonta), but Shuichi’s words to him here seal his fate as the permanent outcast and assigned villain of the group. He had already been struggling with loneliness throughout the beginning chapters of the game, and now Shuichi - the only person he finds truly trustworthy (according to his little whiteboard, at least) - is confirming to him that nobody wants him. Ouch.

I am personally led to believe that a large part of the reason that Kokichi ends up sacrificing himself in Chapter 5 has a lot to do with the broken feelings he would’ve had under the combined guilt of his actions and the crushing reality of loneliness.

Would Kokichi have offered to sacrifice himself anyways given the circumstances? Probably, yeah. However, the way he was so accepting of his death reminded me a lot of Kaede in Chapter 1; she couldn’t allow herself to take the First Blood Perk because she felt that she had to atone for her sins, or she could never live with herself. Kokichi seems, in the moment, to be more than willing to die, perhaps for the same reasons. Not only would be feel like he has to make up for the deaths he caused, but he would also feel like he had nothing left to live for, at least not within the academy anyway.

Or maybe he was just tired from the poison, not from life. But who’s to say? We can’t see inside of his head.

FINAL THOUGHTS / CONCLUSION:

OK, so some final thoughts before wrapping this up: Holy shit, Kokichi is an asshole.

Even knowing the emotional turmoil Kokichi must have been going through, it was still infuriating to see him treat Gonta so poorly in Trial 4. Perhaps it was just a part of his act as well? Regardless, it really just did not sit with me well. Under no circumstance should Kokichi be continulessly yelling at Gonta while he’s crying from the insults, for real. But hey, at least if it was just another act from Kokichi, then he can rest easy knowing he certainly had me fooled.

...

So, in my opinion, Kokichi’s infamous breakdown was entirely fabricated. He had to fake both his tears and his sadism in order to fully convince the world that he was a force of pure malice in order to get away with what he had planned. However, despite his apparent change in personality, he never really was sadistic, and may have even cared for the people around him till the very end.

That’s all I guess ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

#danganronpa v3 #danganronpa #drv3 kokichi #kokichi ouma #kokichi #v3 spoilers #danganronpa spoilers #danganronpa v3 spoilers

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cullxtheherd · 3 years ago

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oh my god I haven't thought about BtVS in so long fdjsaio tell me some of your Angel/Angelus headcanons (insert eyes emoji here)

jhbjghljkghkfgl; oh my GOD i honestly never stopped loving AtS or BtVS!! bgut i did stop watching originally when Doyle perished cause?? sorry but he is babey and though i do understand why the actor was let go from his role, it's still super upsetting. i hate the episode Hero and also love it to pieces- just watched it yesterday and screamed ALLEN FRANCIS NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO for just. so long. tbh i was thinking about adopting him as a muse but tbh with you Angel and older 90s/early 00s muses don't get much attention anyways so i haven't yet skdjksds maybe after Harry from Resident Alien later tonight gets added I'll think about it again ksjdksjd. ANYWAYS THIS ISN'T WHAT YOU ASKED FOR KSJDSkfsd ON WITH IT!! just be aware there is no way i can include all the headcanons here so i'll just hlglhkglkhlgk about the ones i can think of asap

𝓐𝓷𝓰𝓮𝓵

in the show (both buffy & angel) they are constantly telling us through dialogue, scene setting, etc that the reason Angel and (later) Spike hate killing and feeding suddenly is because "killing humans = bad ☹ grr, arrgh." i think it runs deeper than this. i think they are not solely repulsed because it is the morally wrong thing to do. i think they are disgusted in?? an almost obsessive way because of how badly they'd still like to do it despite knowing better and having control over themselves. certain episodes the way Angel and Spike's portrayals go: yes definitely they are giving us that and barely highlighting it. but i really. i don't remember either show ever coming out and saying it outright.

personally i think that the Buffy/Angel romance seems waaaayyy super crazy rushed in the show and i'm not really sure if they/joss even meant it like that! it just really be seeming that way af!!! logically the whole affair lasts about/just shy of three years if we are doing the maths and technically?? it really took 1.5 years before they even did the ol squelchy welch. which lmaooa jksdhkdjsfd can you imagine?? any young adults in a consenting relationship actually waiting that long?? yeah ekjnbswedsdxfks anyways. i just? idk. loved AtS and BtVS very much but his departure seemed super rushed and so did their romance bye sjhdbfs

speaking of?? while i am very much a buffy/angel ship supporter as an adult i do find it so freaking weird he?? was made by Darla in 1898 and theennnn spent 171 motha fuckin years parading around as Angelus- didn't even know about Buffy Summers until he was already 269 (nice) and when acathala SHAT his ass back out he was already 371, she was a juNIOr in higHSCHOOOLPLK ANNNDDD i have a hEAdache i gotta goooOO

no but really i. skhjfjhgf as an adult i am weirded out but?? idk it's one of my childhood ships i gotta pry it from my OWN cold dead hands i guess smh

personally i think Angel keeps trinkets from the people he's saved over the years. and i don't mean at random Investigations via his detective agency or, later, Wolfram & Hart. i mean?? the cases we see like?? the episode 'are you now or have you ever been' that takes us back to the 1950s and the Hyperion Hotel in it's heyday. angel aided a woman named Judy Kovacs- albeit rather reluctantly to try and escape and THEN a literal MOB beat and lynched his ass and thennNNNN, in present time, he fights against the same life-sucking chaos-causing Thesulac demon with his friends/colleagues. after all of this he finds Judy somehow still in her room (214) surviving just a few doors down from his (217) so many years ago just?? waiting. and while canonically the show has Angel in room 312? I disagree. i think he would have taken up residence in 214 or 217...... 214 cause i'm feeling sappy. check his bathroom cabinets i bet you it's got at least a few of her accoutrements living inside.

i think?? despite?? darla not being able to take his soul via the big squelchy that he and Angelus really did care about her- heck!! in the early?? 1900s he DID try to return to her and adapt to her violent way of life he just couldn't do it

while i am?? verryyy willing to write buffy/angel ship stuff i really do think after the events in I Will Remember You it would take a literal set of miracles to get him to even attempt being with Buffy again. i think that while he will always love her no matter what that he has learned that?? things that are or seem too?? good or pure for a creature like him genuinely are. though he is/was the Powers That Be-s-es-es?? ES favorite ensouled boy-toy i really, genuinely do think that a happy ending is just NOT in the cards for our boyo

if buffy wasn't evidence enough of that fact?? cordy. Skip really came and took her just like that. then the whatevers that WHOEVER shat her back out to really just give birth to jasmine and connor and i rrepwsrenbjhdfbskdjnsf worst. season. EVER. i refuse i fucking REFUSE TO EGHV ADBAKJSDFALKFNKSADJF???!?!?!?! i hate it so much. i hate it. so. m u c h. connor and cordy should have never EVER been a thing and i will erase it from history if i have to give birth to myself to do it

𝔸𝕟𝕘𝕖𝕝𝕦𝕤

hoo babey. while angel is?? reserved and doesn't?? really mention any kind of explorative or wild side with any regularity in the show this wild child leather-pants-wearing abomination gives NO shits. he is very, VERY pansexual and you can fight my spirit on top of my grave about it.

regarding the last thing i said: there was definitely a polyamorous relationship happening between Angelus, Darla, Spike and Drusilla in my book. there are certain... jealous scenarios- heck!! just LOOK at episodes with Spike where he's being pouty about not getting the proper attention he deserves. if you think this is just about Dru i am begging you to reconsider

also?!?!?!?! PENN?! Penn was so obsessively and grossly in love with Angelus his sire I can not EVEN BEGIN TO FIUBNFDAKJSDFN

i think?? there are times in Angel's day-to-day where he not only misses but craves the presence of Angelus and visa versa. Angelus obviously seems a bit more openly repulsed by his softer side cause like?? each half is SO strongly suited to one extreme and?? as much as Angel and Angelus would both loathe my next statement: two halves do make a whole.

i think that while?? Angel may be cursed with a soul, that's not all. Angelus doesn't have regular control any longer, for sure, but i really do think it is oftentimes a daily battle to tune him out. why?? the orb of thesulah is only used to summon and store a human soul until it is re/tethered to a body. the ritual that the "Gypsies" and Willow performed didn't?? do anything with the actual demon. it didn't send it back to whatever Hell dimension it came from it just?? gave angel a soul- it gave what was left of Liam (O'Connor if you follow fan-lore) control over himself and the demon inhabiting his body. though the show never depicts or portrays this i am willing to bet real money that somewhere, deep down Angelus is on the inside rattling his mirror against the bars screaming: IM HENRY THE EIGTH I AM I AM!!! over and over an over and ov-

angel, however, when not in control seems to go into some semi-mostly dormant state as evidenced by the fact that he was entirely gone during their time in Acathala and relied on solely the demon half to get him through, but?? i'm 56% sure he is there sniveling in the ether when Angelus is driving he's just?? clearly not as strong mentally.

while?? Angel is a very respectable creature who cares about and loves his friends/found family i really do think that Angelus loves NO ONE. i think he cares about a few entities but i do not think he is capable of love proper as we think of it- both shows continuously remind us that number one in Angelus's world is, in fact, Angelus which means...

i doubt he really cares about pleasing his partner/s where that is likely Angel's main objective and lskjdnfjd i really have to go before this gets super raunchy

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felsdumpsterfire · 4 years ago

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Rockstar! MC3 x Benten music headcannons pretty please??

OK“Art/Headcannons(whatever you like most): Rockstar!P3x Benten please...” -Anon

OIDKJDKSLDF, I COULDN’T FUCKING FIND THE OTHER ASK FOR THIS AND I ALMOST CRIED, BROOOOOOO--

Anyway, spoiler alert I found it, and boy are you speaking to my heart with rockstar! MC3, I love rock soooooo much!! It’s helped me through a lot ;0;

ANYWAY, ANYWAY, ONTO THE HEADCANONS (also put under the cut for length! I- I went over board,,, soooryyyyyy)

Rockstar! Protag 3 x Benten

So just to preface, I have,,,, VOICE HEADCANONS! Specifically singing voice headcanons!

So I feel Protag 3′s singing style and voice would be very similar to Blu Stahli; the guy has a very beautiful voice with a lot of energy and he has an amazing amount of control of it. Two good examples are his two versions of ULTRAnumb!

I also feel like he looks up to a wide variety of rock bands ((and other bands/singers/musicians in general, I’m just focusing on rock ones for now! (or the Housamo universe equivalent of them lmaoooo)), like:

Rammstein- he lives for this dudes growl! He also loves how their music has so much meaning in the lyrics, and thanks to Protag 1 he doesn’t need a translation anymore! He can just mellow out and sink into the music, it’s amazing. Speaking of the meaning in the music, he’ll watch the music videos over and over and over again, just to make sure that he didn’t miss anything.

Within Temptation- He had a mega crush on Sharon Janny den Adel- she’s super pretty ok??? And her voice???? Fucking SUPERB

Miyavi- He really loves the hype that Miyavi puts into his music, he also is just,,,,, so in love with this guy’s voice!

Starset- Absolutely, 100000% also had a crush on Dustin Bates; he loves the passion in their music and the story in each of them. He also loves how romantic they can be despite the stereotypes that come with the music, it makes him ecstatic and their music lifts him up when he feels bummed out

Chevelle- This was one of the bands that originally got him into rock in the first place. The emotion in the songs, Pete Loeffler’s voice- just everything about this band took his breath away and he was hooked ever since

youtube

Benten, and yes, if you were here for the entire “what songs remind us of Benten thread” then I hardcore headcanon her songs having a very Paramore mixed with Avril Lavigne vibe; also I think out of the two she’d sound more like Avril-

Benten also looks up to a lot of singers, though they tend to revolve around more 2000′s and alt groups:

Linkin Park- A huuuge influence on her and a band that helped her get through a lot of slumps in her middle school and high school years and when she was first starting out in the rock world, they were also a really big motivator for her. She was devastated when Chester passed away and held a dedication for him, defiantly sang one of his songs (which she killed); it was most likely One More Light or Castle of Glass.

Bring Me the Horizon- SHE HAD A BIG OOOOOOL’ CRUSH ON OLIVER SKYES OK???? THE HAIR, THE TATTOOS, THAT VOICE? MMMMMM- SHE WAS HOOKED

U2- hooooly shit, my dude, she loves them sooooo much, she just loved how atmospheric their music could be

Muse- Very similar to why she likes U2; she also really loves the lead singer’s voice, it soothes her a lot. Her favorite song by them in Madness

Green Day- Ok, this one is kind of a given- have you seen her style???? She looks up to them, they were a major player in her falling in love with rock

Disturbed- TWO WORDS: DAVID DRAIMAN. HIS VOICE???? CHEF’S KISSES- Amazing. Superb. Good food. She lives for this band and absolutely loves the shit out of them

youtube

Ok, onto the relationship!

I feel like Benten was the first to notice Protag 3 since I feel like he was a rising star in the Rock world and it pissed her off to no end because it felt like this dude was just doing it seamlessly

She felt extremely cheated, because it took blood, sweat, and tears for her to get to where she is now, and this dude- this newbie- who barely started a few months prior was already making number ones and shit

And thus he became her unknowing rival

They don’t meet until their at a rock concert festival where they’re both performing and when Benten catches wind of this, she is so ready to rip this dude to shreds with her music prowess. She’s ready to take names and show Protag 3 up

But when she meets him, it all..... kinda goes down the drain.

Because

A) This dude is an absolute sweetheart, like, he’s so humble and sweet despite him towering a good foot and couple of inches over her (The guy can look Ifit in the eye, that’s scary enough)

And B) He is absolutely gushing over the band. He’s so excited, he honestly reminds her of a puppy- but he’s jumping from band member to band member, shaking their hands, being all around really sweet and showering them all in compliments

Then, he gets to Benten and he shoots into this long winded thank you for writing music and performing and he hopes that he can reach her level one day and preform by her side

And dangit-

How do you hate a dude like that? You’re a monster, that’s what. An asshole, he’s sweet, how could you?

Anyway, it’s crush at first sight for her because omg, he’s adorable and I have to smooch him at least once

And that’s how Protag 3 and Benten’s relationship begins

Once they do get together, Protag 3 is a very openly affectionate person with his partners in general, and it throws Benten for a bit of a loop sometimes. It takes her a bit to get used to all the sudden affection that is handed to her by this big ol’ god of a rockstar- but once she does she. is. H O O K E D.

Benten buys Protag 3 gifts, she’s a borderline sugar mama, I ain’t gonna lie. She likes to provide, that’s all. And she has the money for it- especially if it’s for her adorable himbo of a boyfriend, then anything is on the table.

Protag 3 has gotten particularly internet famous due to Benten taking so many photos of him and posting them on all her social medias. This dude has an angel face and when he smiles it’s like God has come down himself- it also helps that he’s super nice? He’s the biggest teddy bear out there. And Benten was a little jealous of all the attention he was getting at first and then she stumbled upon his Insta and, there’s so many photos of them together and everyone is gushing over them and it’s just,,,, it melts her heart.

Benten get’s jealous easily, she is by far the more possessive of the two- and it’s not like she doesn’t trust Protag 3- she just doesn’t trust other people, it also doesn’t help that he’s the sweetest thing on the face of the Earth- what if someone stole him? What would she do then??????

So, she defiantly clings to his arm and sticks her tongue out at people who are getting a tad too touchy with him

I’ve headcanoned before, but Protag 3 doesn’t get jealous- it’s nearly impossible- but what he does do, it get protective. So it fans are pushing at Benten just a little too hard, he will defiantly take a step in front of her and give ‘em a look that says: ‘back the fuck up’

These two sing to each other if the other is stressed or they just can’t go to sleep and they’re exhausted

They really enjoy doing duets together and their voices mesh pretty well- it’s really sweet and it makes their souls hum

Benten really likes to play with Protag 3′s piercings. Specifically his lip and nipple piercings

It flusters the fuck out him, but as long as she’s having a good time, it’s fine

They’re really each other’s biggest fans and it’s fucking cute as hell, dude, so cute

Bonus! Art:

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earthrealmlesbian · 5 years ago

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Kitana x Jade for the questions plz?

1) Who rocks the Ferris Wheel seat and who flips out and begs them to stop? Both rock the seats! Nothing crazy, just enough to get the other giggling. Jade is more likely to put more umph into it though. Usually to get Kitana to gasp and cling to her while admonishing her playfully.

2) Who is always horny and will have sex at any time, at any place and at any time? Both have a decent sex drive but neither are quite that needy about it. They can wait more often than not. Kitana's thoughts can wander if she's in a very boring meeting and Jade is nearby though.

3) Who is more into taking showers/baths together? Who tries to make it relaxing and who tries to make it sexy time? Both enjoy shower/bath time! Jade likes showers more since she enjoys the moving water. Kitana really likes lounging in baths though. Kitana tends to keep it relaxing but she's not gonna say no when Jade offers to wash her body with a wink.

4) Who likes to walk around the house naked and who tells the other to go put some clothes on? Jade loses more and more clothes the closer they get to bedtime much to Kitana's amusement. She'll joke about have to walk behind her and pick up all the clothes she's dropping. Both occasionally relax topless when the Outworld heat gets unbearable.

5) Who sleeps on the couch when they get into a fight? Neither? They argue rarely and when they do they try their best to work it out before they sleep. They don't get enough peaceful time together alone in the first place, they're not going to waste it angry with each other. If an argument gets particularly heated Jade will take a walk and Kitana will make them both cups of hot tea as a truce for when she gets back.

6) Who takes photos of the other while they sleep? Kitana all the way. They're both sentimental but Kitana likes physical reminders. She's got a million pics of Jade on her phone and more than a few printed out for scrapbooks. Jade has one or two of Kitana making hilarious faces when she's passed out though.

7) Who said “I love you” first? and who ends their arguments in a fight with “Because I love you”? Kitana said it first. She confessed her feelings to Jade secretly when Shao Kahn was still in power. She whispered it like a prayer. (Jade said it back of course.) Jade takes her duty of protecting Kitana very seriously and if they argue because she thinks her wife is playing it a little fast and loose with her safety then Kitana is definitely getting hit with the "because I love you!"

8) Who likes to wear the others sweatshirts? Kitana. Going back to her liking physical reminders of their relationship, she thinks wearing Jade's clothes is one of life's little pleasures.

9) Who wakes the other up in the middle of the night to tell them a cool dream they had? Who has the most nightmares, and who sings them back to sleep after? Sleep is something they both treasure so neither is going to interrupt that for the other if they don't have to. Both have nightmares unfortunately. Jade especially of meeting her Revenant. Jade will sing Edenian lullabies to Kitana on bad nights.

10) Who is more likely to cheat? At games you mean. Jade for sure. She's a brat and merciless about taking advantage of people not paying attention. Kitana says she doesn't cheat "on principle" but that's a big ol lie. She's learned from the best. (Jade)

11) Who makes fun of the other for having a crush on them, and who has to remind them that they are in a relationship? Oh, Jade loves good natured teasing. Kitana will add a photo of them to a scrapbook and Jade will look over her shoulder playfully. "Wow, it's almost like you have a crush on me…" Kitana always gives a little huff. "It's been decades! You're my wife!" Jade likes to pretend she's shocked to hear the news lmao

12) Who starts a food fight in the kitchen?Kitana technically but usually only flicking tea at Jade or something else inconsequential. Jade is the brat that responds by flicking peas at Kitana's forehead. They don't go crazy with it though.

13) Who initiates duets? and who is the better singer? Kitana can't sing well.…she's not atrocious at least? That doesn't stop Jade from often trying to get her to join her in singing love songs in the bathtub. Kitana complains that Jade's just showing off because she's a way better singer.

14) Who starts the hand holding? Who grabs the others butt? Who slides their arm around their waist? Who likes to put their fingers in the belt loops? They both like holding hands!! It's one of the only things they do publicly. In private, either will do the other three things under the right circumstances. If Kitana is cooking Jade will wrap an arm around her waist. Kitana likes to pull Jade on her lap and squeeze her ass when she's in the mood. Jade will loop her fingers in Kitana's belt loops or equivalent when they take late light walks.

15) Who writes the others name on their wrist? Hmm neither really but Kitana will do something close. They aren't apart often, but when they are Kitana can be caught idly writing her name on paperwork.

16) Who is more seductive when they are drunk? and who is louder in bed? Jade gets +10 seduction power with each drink. It's not fair. Neither will get more than buzzed though. Which is good since Kitana goes straight from seductive to sappy after two drinks. (Jade thinks it's cute.) Kitana is louder in bed by a mile.

17) Who is more protective? God…Jade. She insists on staying in charge of Kitana's security and takes her job seriously. Don't even look at Kitana funny or else.

18) Who talks to the other while they are sleeping? Jade mostly. She'll ramble a bit about this or that or get a little romantic in softer moments. Kitana is more apt to quietly admiring Jade while she sleeps.

19) Who drives and who has the window seat? They both learned to drive when they started making more trips to Earthrealm. (Please imagine the kombat kids crammed in the back of a military vehicle being gremlins while Johnny Cage of all people tries to teach Kitana to drive sgsgdufu) It was a harrowing experience but Jade actually likes driving and Kitana is content to take the window seat.

20) Who falls asleep in the others lap and who carries them to bed? Either depending on the day. Kitana likes to lay in Jade's lap while she reads. Jade will lay back and let Kitana massage her face and play with her hair. They've both fallen asleep in either case. Kitana loves it when Jade picks her up bridal style. She likes Jade picking her up period.

21) Who cuts the others hair? They keep each other's hair trimmed!

22) Who is super bad at sexting? and who sends them encouraging messages throughout the day? They'll both send a few positive messages here or there. Not too many unless it's a stressful day. Ysdhfuigiv Kitana is awful at sexting. She's not really embarrassed by anything regarding sex but there's just something about trying to physically write it down that flusters her. She suddenly sounds like a robot and it drives Jade up the wall.

Jade: My love, I can't stop thinking about running my hands down your body.

Kitana: Yes, of course. You may. I'd like that very much.

Jade: Babe.....seriously?

23) Who thinks they are not good enough for the others love? and who’s more afraid of loosing the other? Who thinks they keep messing up, only for the other to tell them they don’t need to worry? Both are confident women, and equally confident they are right for one another. Both are scared of losing the other but Jade especially worries she'll lose Kitana if she slips up trying to protect her. Earlier in the relationship Jade thought the stress of trying to keep their relationship secret might be too much for Kitana and that made her guilty. Now that they're openly together it's not an issue.

24) Who starts random slow dancing with the other in the kitchen? Who holds the other just above the ground and kisses them? Kitana will definitely pull Jade in for a slow, romantic dance. Jade knows Kitana likes being picked up so she'll hold her above the ground (or have Kitana wrap her legs around her waist) for some playful kisses.

25) Who says shitty puns and sex jokes just to see the other giggle and blush?Jade for sure. She loves getting Kitana to give her an exasperated giggle. She's got enough people throwing out awful pickup lines at her so she'll repeat those often. Kitana loses it a little every time.

26) Who kissed first? Kitana when she first confessed and Jade returned her feelings.

27) Who orders take out at two in a morning? and who wakes the other up at three in the morning to go downstairs with them to get a glass of water because it’s too dark? They cherish what sleep they get so neither would ask the other for that kind of favor nor would they be inclined to. On sleepless nights they'll slip into the kitchen so Kitana can whip up something really self indulgent. They don't leave much of a mess which the palace kitchen staff is grateful for.

28) Who writes poems/stories and love songs about the other? Do they sing the songs the write for them? Kitana writes poems on occasion. She's pretty decent at it too. Jade will tuck them into one of Kitana's scrapbooks for safe keeping and give them a read sometimes when she's alone. Jade usually just makes up love songs on the fly or repeats ones she knows.

29) Who does some crazy stunt to try and impress the other and who ends up driving them to the emergency room after it backfires? Neither! If either take risks it's usually in a serious situation and not at all to impress each other.

30) Who is embarrassed when they have to wear their glasses and who thinks they look super cute? Neither need glasses BUT Jonny bought them a pair of sunglasses as a joke (but also kinda not cuz damn Outworld is bright? Eye care ladies.) and Kitana is mortified when she realizes Jade looks really good in them?? She doesn't want to give Johnny the satisfaction of knowing he did a good. At all.

Thank you for the ask and for waiting patiently!!

#mortal kombat #asks #jade #kitana #headcanons

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celinehq · 6 years ago

Photo

hello, hello !! my name is eleanor, i’m 21 and in the gmt timezone. this is celine, real name being celine zellmann, my ol’ solo artist. under the cut is a little more about her. please come and plot with me !!

↷ ･:*:･ﾟ☆ ( constance zimmer. forty six. cisfemale. she/her ) ↷ ( celine ) has been spotted by the paparazzi in los angeles. they are an ( a ) list celebrity known for their career as a ( pop & jazz singer ). they’re known by their fans to be ( compassionate, dedicated & innovative ) but the tabloids frequently portray them to be ( defeatist, impulsive & sensitive) . i wish them every success in the entertainment industry. [lady gaga vc]. (eleanor. 21. bst. she/her) ･:*:･ﾟ☆

this intro is more about her personally than her professional achievements; this will come later !!

born to german migrant parents, they always taught her to work hard for what she wanted. they were proud of her but always put a lot of pressure on her when she was at school; they wanted their daughter to succeed in academics and while she proved to be intelligent, she was always more drawn to arts.

she was an artist. loved to paint, sing and dance. her mother did enrol her into ballet but it was always too restrictive to her. she’d always be getting into trouble for adding her own spin or improvising in some way and that didn’t make her mother impressed that they were throwing away their money on her to disobey the teacher and her wishes to do well at it.

while she attended private school growing up, celine absolutely hated it. although she kept her head down, there was always someone picking up on what she was doing; she learned to ignore them. despite her insecure nature in adulthood, she was extremely confident in her younger years. sadly, people took this away from her as she started to be more open about writing her own songs and doing her own choreography. she tried to collaborate with friends at one point but her vision was too great and she needed control of all of it. thankfully, she has improved on letting people take the wheel and has had some very successful collabs with people.

as her parents were all about academics, they pushed her to get into julliard only for her to get in and quit when she was nineteen, in her first year. it all seemed a bit pointless to them and they were incredibly disappointed in her. with no secured job, she ended up working as a barmaid and singing in some dive bars before she was discovered at the age of twenty.

celine was young, maybe not younger than most but not old enough to know what she really wanted. although she was a person of great vision, she did let herself be controlled by her management. the young woman was sick of scraping by and needed some financial comfort; the only way that could happen was for her to make it big. it was all or nothing with her.

she was always worried about disappointing her parents and all those around her and that’s exactly what she felt like she did.

as if it were overnight, she had her big first hit at the age of twenty three and everything seemed to rush off from there. she brought out multiple albums and the tours shortly followed. celine was always so dedicated to them. whether the event was big or small, she’d put her everything into it. unfortunately, there were always people to give negative comments and even write her off altogether and she took all of this very personally and always has.

however, the bigger she got, the harder it got for her to cope with her fame. she was lead astray, she knew that and tried to resist but the party scene seemed to suck out her soul and she ended up doing some questionable things. it wasn’t that she was necessarily addicted to it but the people she was spending time with were toxic. celine’s insecurities heightened and all she wanted was to me loved and appreciated by other’s in the industry.

she’s a gay icon, i called it. she’s been openly bisexual but did receive a lot of backlash for it as people believed she was just out for attention, like her behaviour indicated. the tabloids would never leave her alone and her team just seemed to throw her to the wolves.

she was severely damaging herself for a while with this behaviour and it wasn’t until a stranger in a club took her to one side and was honest with her; she needed help to solve her issues instead of trying to ignore them. that person would be her ex husband. he had been honest with her fro day one and had tried to help her out of a place of concern, not because he wanted anything from her.

they were married and their daughter, tabitha, was born in 2009.

the two of them were happy for a while. celine was in therapy, she had taken a hiatus to explore the world of jazz after her daughter was born and she had a supportive husband. yes, she did mess up some days and go on the wrong path but he was patient with her and trusted that she would always find her way back home to him and tabs.

however, in 2011 she was involved in a car accident. a drunk driver was speeding, going out of control on turns and smashed into the car she was in. it look her a long time to get back on her feet. the woman hated that she couldn’t do things alone for the first year; her dignity was lost and she couldn’t really control anything. all she could think about was how this was the end of her career.

after the accident as she recovered, her relationship did deteriorate with her husband. she was bitter, depressed and there was only so much he could take from her. her pain never seemed to subside and it was tough on him. she did understand when the divorce came around and it was all under wraps until her manager leaked it to the press.

her comeback was in the year of 2013 but it was clear the accident had taken a toll on her both physically and mentally. she was able to get to a better physical health but she lacked the mentality behind it all. people around her continued to push her, even her new team and it just made her pain worse.

celine was diagnosed with fibromyalgia in 2015 a

she is back but feels like she’s too old for a comeback. she’s just come off her tour (managed to get to the end of it) but her body is failing her and she sees all of these up and coming stars that just remind her that if she’s not considered one of the greats by now (which she is with gaga’s vc let’s not lie to ourselves) then she’ll just be forgotten about. she has earned a lot of money but it’s not everything. she constantly fights with her ex about the well-being of their daughter and he has a few things to say about her public behaviour; he does care about her, he just doesn’t know how to put that into words anymore. he has moved on and is remarried but that doesn’t stop him caring about her family.

her daughter tabitha absolutely loves her. she’s sad that she doesn’t get to see her as much as she likes as celine’s constantly throwing herself into her work but the girl thinks the absolute world of her. don’t get me wrong, tabitha is a savage nine year old and she does lecture her mom on a few things but deep down, she’s using up her humor to cover up the worry she has for the woman. she can tell when her mother’s either having a bad day, in pain or both and she doesn’t like it at all.

celine is frequently featured on tabitha’s youtube channel, mostly centred around her mother and annoying her to death !! it’s funny but savage; she gets away with it because she’s cute. tabs is very honest and that’s honestly great for her mother, she helps to keep her grounded. despite her reluctance, she has started taking tabitha to red carpet events because the little girl is so interested in it. she wants to become a comedian and the president so needs to get all the exposure she can get.

say something bad about tabitha to celine’s face and that’s it, you’re done.

as her pain worsens, she’s being dramatic and thinking of quitting the industry completely. she’s such a creative person and a talented piano player/songwriter, she should look over all her options but she is so quick to become defeatist.

the media just makes everything worse as she’s getting really sick of the drama it causes. she’s reaching fifty and she knows that her levels of insecurity aren’t normal.

personality traits:

protective, caring, humorous, empathetic, good-natured, loyal, nurturing, charismatic, approachable.

impulsive, self-depreciating, obsessive, defeatist, sensitive, over-emotional, neglectful, insecure.

all in all, celine has a heart of gold but does have her issues. she is one of the greats, even if people don’t necessarily like her and she has dabbled in a lot of musical genres over the years. please come and plot with me !!

#fameshq.intro #depression tw #car accident tw

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unclewarwick · 2 years ago

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people are like im 37 years old and assumedly have a whole life with a job and friends but i spend sooo much energy thinking about how the biggest problem in the world is that pedophilic content is censored and not easily available and i make infographics about it and how awesome it is to be attracted to children and how it is ABUSIVE BEHAVIOUR to tell someone online that it’s disgusting, and actually i think it’s just like homophobia (i’m allowed to say that because i’m queer) and we need to celebrate our FREEDOM to do anything we want (be attracted to children) and if you point out my age YOU’RE BEING AGEIST and we cherish our precious incest ships because there’s nothing better than a story about forbidden love (and if someone is trying to CENSOR a specific kind of story, that means it should be celebrated so much more [i hate oppression sooo much... btw i hate most Black characters, for mysterious reasons]) and also i have a huge over-reliance on tropes because there’s absolutely no substance to what i write and everything i read has to be the same story over and over again and i have mental breakdowns over people telling me every day that im a bad person? that i am dangerous to kids (again, i’m queer so this kind of statement sounds very suspicious and familiar. ignore the fact that i enjoy sexual content about children)? that i should touch grass? that i should stop pretending criticism of people like me spawns from puritanical beliefs? that i should stop pretending this is meaningful commentary on fandom culture? that i should stop reminiscing about the good ol’ days (REMEMBER FANDOM HISTORY!!! THIS IS FOR SOME REASON SO INCREDIBLY IMPORTANT!!!!! REMEMBER WHERE YOU CAME FROM!!! WHY ARE WE ACTING LIKE THIS IS A SIGNIFICANT CULTURAL THING!!) when apparently everyone in fandom loved pedophilia, before you pesky KIDS came along and ruined it.......... oh.............. that i should stop pretending my ideology is against bullying and harassment (ignore how i sic my badass pedophile friend group onto people to make clumsy insults about them if someone DARES to try to say anything critical about me flaunting my attraction to children)? that i am repulsive and my life has no value and i add nothing to this world and i should die HEY WAIT that sounds exactly like fascism, don’t those guys try to eradicate certain types of people? you seriously want to do a pedophile genocide? oh, you’re just saying it on an individual basis and you don’t think there should be a systemic ability to kill people for any reason? i can’t believe you openly hurl DEATH THREATS at people... isn’t that morally reprehensible? what if i said i think people are born this way? i can’t change this about me, so why should it be condemned (ignore how it’s very much a choice to seek out pedophilic media and constantly engage with it and spends hours upon hours drawing or writing that shit and posting about it and making it my entire personality and life)? am i supposed to just NOT reply obsessively to each and every comment that rightfully upset fourteen year olds leave on my posts and act like i deserve a reminder every second of the day that my choices are fucking terrible and i make a very dangerous environment for everyone, but especially young people who simply want to talk about their cartoons in peace? am i just not supposed to post my explicitly sexual art of the characters while using the main tags and putting no kind of warning (ignore how i love to tell people to curate their online experience and say that we ALWAYS make it easy to avoid seeing this shit) hey also, this time, the art wasn’t even depicting characters who are minors so i don’t know what you people are getting so upset about! i can’t believe every single one of you folx who are AGAINST people like me definitely all know each other and all communicate in a giant group chat and talk about how to conspire against us innocents! i can’t believe that you would say such things to VICTIMS OF CHILDHOOD SEXUAL ABUSE (nobody else except us has ever actually experienced this btw and differing views are just wrong, but i am totally a reasonable normal person) or say that our background means nothing regarding our choices and actually makes it worse because we use our victimhood as a way to groom people into our cult or try to soften what we really get up to or that we encourage abuse victims to read triggering content because no no it’s soooo healing and normal and healthy - ONE therapist i heard of said it was okay - or if you have intrusive thoughts because of ocd, you should also totally engage with pedophilic content- have you ever heard of immersion therapy? it’s the exact same thing and it won’t do anything weird to your brain at ALL and you’ll have really regular, healthy perceptions of the world and people, and be able to interact with others in a really Usual and Not odd way. if you have a problem with my online presence then uhhhh i think you’re a big whiny snowflake, you’re probably like TWELVE years old (i evidently really hate kids, they’re ALWAYS pestering me and snivelling so uh KIDS DNI, but also i just read smut involving a kid this same age) and you wouldn’t survive anywhere in the REAL world... but anyway yeah, fiction has no affect on reality and that’s why i have such a tight grip on all this fiction i enjoy and spend every waking moment of my day thinking about.

also please tag any criticism about media i like. it will ruin my day if i see a worldview that differs from mine, or anything that adds complexity or nuance to my interests. thank you.

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fatedreamt-blog · 6 years ago

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Every. Odd. Number. choose a muse i love you

detailed oc questions. / open.

1. What’s their full name? Why was that chosen? Does it mean anything?

cole’s full name - corazon lumaban - was chosen after the nickname cole! and cole came from broccoli bc it’s a… i don’t wanna say gag bc that doesn’t rlly fit but neither does theme? in their story. a lot of the names i choose for ocs are usually just names that fit right to me / the character. i don’t… put a lot of thought into them which maybe i should but? fhskjh either way, names are chosen based off a theme / aesthetic i want to convey ( cain / abel’s slight biblical themes and the story influencing cain’s, houston’s name being based off of houston, texas, and texas being, for me anyways, the first state you think of when you think of southern, etc ), or are just made up on the spot / randomly given based on the feel it gives. rhys’s last name, matthews, was an on the spot name, and so was katherine’s first name.

3. Did they have a good childhood? What are fond memories they have of it? What’s a bad memory?

monroe had a good childhood! they had hearing but supportive parents who made sure they learned asl at a young age. they attended a deaf/hoh school when they were younger, but switched to a regular public school when they got older bc they wanted to meet more people. of course, they have bad memories in relation to being hoh, but the good far outweighs the bad.

stribog had… a complicated childhood. his parents were there, but because he grew up in a large family and a large household, he eventually grew to get used to being excluded or forgotten. he likes to think it’s not his parents’ fault, and has fond memories of having cole over, or playing with his siblings. he had a good relationship with his siblings - with its obvious bumps of course - and is okay with the childhood he had.

5. Do they have any siblings? What’s their names? What is their relationship with them? Has their relationship changed since they were kids to adults?

leaf has 2 step siblings named tomone and masao. her relationship with them is… very strained, and the comparison made to them by her parents fueled her inferiority complex. she’s very bitter towards them and doesn’t really like to talk to her family, because while tomone and masao are friendly enough, something about them always digs up memories and makes her feel bad. it doesn’t help that when she still had contact with her parents, they still compared her to her step siblings even when she turned 18. she cut contact with them when she turned 19.

mk’s older brother and guardian is bryan admon! he was sorta… thrust into this older brother slash guardian figure because their dad started to become very busy and absent, and their mom died giving birth to mk. they have a close relationship, and while mk is omniscient, bryan still takes care of them as best as he can. he doesn’t understand a lot about them or their obligations because he’s just a regular ol human, but he tries his best to help out and support them. he’s a good.

7. Did they have lots of friends as a child? Did they keep any of their childhood friends into adulthood?

……i’m looking at my ocs list and i don’t think any of them really were popular as kids…? i’m sure they had the occasional friend ( ash, noah, monroe, etc ), but some of them were isolated and didn’t make friends easy. i’d say miriam kept some of her childhood friends well into adulthood!

9. Do animals like them? Do they get on well with animals?

synne, the druid they are, LOVES animals. they connect with them better than they do with most people, and in modern au, work at a pet store. animals usually like them. micah and monroe love birds specifically and are probably friends + part of the same birdwatching club. birds like micah, and a specific family of birds that made residence in 1 of their flower pots like monroe.

11. Do they have any special diet requirements? Are they a vegetarian? Vegan? Have any allergies?

katherine and rory are both vegetarians! the former also doesn’t like eggs, just because she dislikes the texture, and needs more protein in her diet. neither of them have allergies. rory makes Amazing veggie burgers and really goes out of his way to replicate certain food, but vegetarian. he tries to shy away from animal-based products, but isn’t super strictly vegan. katherine just… throws together whatever she can for dinner. she adjusts easily.

13. What is their least favourite food?

noah… does not like anything with a chunky texture, and especially hates cottage and blue cheese.

15. Are they good at cooking? Do they enjoy it? What do others think of their cooking?

ash is pretty good at cooking! so is micah, rory and andy. other people are in a general consensus that they make good food. toby… we know of his cooking and eating habits and no one approves of them

17. Do they like to take photos? What do they like to take photos of? Selfies? What do they do with their photos?

andy loves taking photos!! she likes remembering and commemorating events and will insist on taking pictures whenever she can. she likes to organize them into albums on her phone, or make them into scrapbooks. she seldom takes selfies of herself. as she is a model, she figures she has enough photos of herself out there.

micah, on the other hand, has no photos of him available. he tries not to get into pictures a lot, which andy is understanding of. it’s probably connected to the fact that there’s no information about him anywhere.

19. What’s their least favourite genres?

jo doesn’t like music that’s loud for the sake of being loud.

21. Do they have a temper? Are they patient? What are they like when they do lose their temper?

rory… has somewhat of a temper? he gets really protective which manifests in aggression, but it’s not angry. you can tell he’s angry when he’s oddly silent and quiet, a simmering kind of rage that bites at you. he’s really patient though. the same applies to toby - no one’s really ever seen him angry before, but when he is, he goes silent. it’s terrifying.

jo doesn’t have a temper, but she does have a bit of an explosive anger. when she’s really mad at someone - which doesn’t happen often, because she’s usually a chill and easygoing person - she just bursts and yells. it’s a lot.

leaf cries when she’s angry. she doesn’t get angry too easily, but there are things that poke at her, and she’s just sobbing when she gets mad.

23. Do they have a good memory? Short term or long term? Are they good with names? Or faces?

houston and mk both have excellent memories - it comes with being omniscient. they remember faces and names easily, even far into their life. leaf’s forgetful, and usually has to write things down to remember them.

25. What do they find funny? Do they have a good sense of humour? Are they funny themselves?

miriam loves videos like that one video of the girl asking alexa to play baby shark. it more makes her smile than anything else, but it brightens her day a lot. she also finds karma and irony funny, and has a pretty good sense of humor about things. she’s pretty funny! she has a very specific brand of humor.

27. What makes them sad? Do they cry regularly? Do they cry openly or hide it? What are they like they are sad?

as mentioned above, leaf cries a lot. it’s the first reaction that comes to her. not a lot of things make her sad enough to cry, though, but sometimes she’ll just randomly remember something or something will dampen her mood a lot and she’ll cry. she’s grown to cry silently, and will often hide out in bathrooms of public places sometimes. she has a game with herself that it’s her “goal” to cry in every public bathroom. it helps her cope. she’s a lot more cheery when she’s sad as an attempt to hide how miserable she is.

29. What do they do when they find out someone else’s fear? Do they tease them? Or get very over protective?

micah gets protective and tries to steer them away from their fear if it pops up. rhys’ll probably use it against the person if it’s not a loved one, and will likely use it as a part of his fear tactic.

31. Do they drink? What are they like drunk? What are they like hungover? How do they act when other people are drunk or hungover? Kind or teasing?

stribog drinks to cope, but it’s not that often. just when he’s really stressed. he gets very quiet when he’s drunk, very emotional and honest, and doesn’t really get hangovers. he comforts other people when they’re drunk and tries his best to be kind towards them. rhys has no alcohol tolerance and tries not to drink in the first place.

jo refuses to drink at all. it’s not her thing, and she doesn’t want to be involved in it.

33. What underwear do they wear? Boxers or briefs? Lacey? Comfy granny panties?

andy wears all sorts of underwear! nothing else to say about that - they’re usually very cute and pretty though, and typically patterned.

35. What’s their guilty pleasure? What is their totally unguilty pleasure?

cain’s guilty pleasure… bad sitcoms. he finds them fascinatingly enjoyable in a weird, sadistic way. they’re so bad they’re funny to him. he also likes things that remind him of his childhood - stuffed animals, for example, are one of them. his unguilty pleasure is long, detailed novels.

37. Do they like to read? Are they a fast or slow reader? Do they like poetry? Fictional or non fiction?

ash is a fast reader! she likes reading, and definitely likes poetry. mary shelly’s one of her favorite authors - or at least, good to read - and she likes the last man and the mortal immortal. she enjoys books that deal with moral dilemmas and reality, but is also a sucker for romance novels. she tends to lean towards fiction, but will read nonfiction sometimes. being a librarian, she has a wide array of book to choose from.

39. Do they like letters? Or prefer emails/messaging?

monroe likes the aesthetic of letters! while emails and messaging are quicker and easier, they like receiving and writing letters. there’s something so weirdly nostalgic and heart fluttering about getting a hand written letter in the mail to them.

miriam prefers emailing and messaging, but will always send hand written thank you notes whenever she or her kids get a gift.

41. What’s their sexuality? What do they find attractive? Physically and mentally? What do they like/need in a relationship?

cole is pan! they don’t really have any specific type, but they do tend to fall in love with sweet, kind, quiet people. people who are unassuming, but try to do good. they like and need trust in a relationship, as well as understanding. sometimes they’re not doing so hot and they need their partner to know that they need distance. i’ve got a Whole meta about leaf and love/relationships in my metas tag, so i don’t think i need to touch upon that hgkjsh

43. Are they religious? What do they think of religion? What do they think of religious people? What do they think of non religious people?

miriam is christian, and has definitely used religion as an anchor. her faith’s helped her during hardships in her life, and thinks it’s a good stability to have in life, but understands why other people may not believe in god and respects that.

45. How do other people see them? Is it similar to how they see themselves?

mk describes themself as an oddity, an ethereal abomination. they know they’re not ordinary, and fully embraces that, even using it to freak people out sometimes. a lot of kids - and adults, occasionally - do think they’re weird and a freak, which isn’t something they really… like. they don’t like being called a freak. mk thinks that they’re a pretty okay kid.

rhys sees himself as… well, a machine. he does think highly of himself, but it’s more that he thinks highly of his origin than of himself. it’s not oh, rhys is better, it’s oh, robots are better. he really has no opinions on himself otherwise. people see him as a charming person, usually, because that’s what he presents himself as. but y’know. We All Know The Truth

47. How do they act in a formal occasion? What do they think of black tie wear? Do they enjoy fancy parties and love to chit chat or loathe the whole event?

micah likes dressing up! he likes making it a thing and going all out. he seldom gets to wear suits and the like, so wearing them and going to a party or something is fun to him. he likes to chit chat, and what he does puts him as someone important and charitable to a lot of people. not only does he donate a lot of his earnings, he also has a mansion / penthouse where he lets people stay if they’re refugees, homeless, coming from bad situations, etc. he gets invited to fancy charity events often, and likes going to them occasionally.

monroe finds them stuffy and boring, and stribog gets nervous at them. rhys is practically used to them, though.

49. What is their most valued object? Are they sentimental? Is there something they have to take everywhere with them?

cain doesn’t like holding connections to his past, but he does have a very ratty, very old teddy bear from his mom. it sits in a drawer in his desk that’s locked, and he’s very protective over it. he doesn’t want anything bad happening to it.

synne has their circlet, which is something they enjoy for aesthetic reasons, but it’s also a reminder on why they’re going out on adventures and the such. it helps them not lose sight of their goal. of course, their adventures and the reason for doing them have changed and advanced, but still. they take it everywhere with them, as it is part of their outfit, and is relatively sentimental.

#useknives #THANK U ILYSM!!!!!!!#AA #long post #4 ppl on mobile hgskjth #alcohol #death #ask to tag #system upgrades. / headcanons: rhys.#she painted smiles on every face except her own. / headcanons: ash.#which part of jolene died that day? / headcanons: jo.#seawater chokes you. / headcanons: katherine.#nostalgia is a dirty liar who insists things were better back then. / headcanons: leaf.#you cut the roots off of flowers to prove they can be free too. / headcanons: mushroom kid.#you're worse than nicotine. / headcanons: noah.#if only hell didn't feel like home. / headcanons: rory.#what prayers do we say when we think god isn't listening? / headcanons: andy.#if anyone asks you haven't heard of me. / headcanons: micah.#the greatest mystery is himself. / headcanons: houston.#half truths are still half lies. / headcanons: cain.#we're alone in the ocean. / headcanons: cole.#it does not heal. not today. maybe tomorrow. / headcanons: stribog.#facts you don't know about yourself. / headcanons: toby.#everyone is guilty of something. / headcanons: synne.#......i should've added ado atlas n dustin 2 but I Forgot Bc They're Not Fandomless #/ Original Canons #fhksjhg o well maybe next time #find the art in everything. / headcanons: miriam.#i've never been one to half ass shenanigans. / headcanons: monroe.

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thequietuptown · 3 years ago

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Hi, I've read some posts, and I was wondering if you could help me. I've been getting into more and more frequent arguments lately because I feel like I'm constantly defending my friends for having conservative or Christian views. It's exhausting, and really I just want everyone to get along so that we can live I'm harmony and build a better future. Can you come up with a better way to explain this, or a way to help me understand why people are so quick to write someone off?

Hi there, friend,

Thank you for the vote of confidence and for what seems like a carefully crafted question. I was actually just speaking about a similar situation last night. I can certainly provide my take on the issue and offer compassion and empathy.

First, I want to take a moment to be proud of you because not only are you sticking up for people you care about, but you're doing so in a way that makes it clear you might not necessarily agree with them, and that's an incredibly difficult position to be in. The funneling of information in our current era of 24 hour news cycles and targeted ads is something that we know can lead to indoctrination and extremism on both sides, and it seems like the only way someone can break out of some of those harmful and unsubstantiated beliefs is either with loving guidance or a strong sense of determination to educate oneself. If you are taking on that role, please remember to take care of yourself.

Now, regarding the judgment that people are quickly jumping to the conclusion to write someone off, please understand that is generally not a quick decision people make. While those conversations may feel somewhat casual to you, conversations about Conservative or Christian ideologies can dredge up a lot of feelings for people who may have experienced trauma because of those views. While I would agree that some of the core tenets of conservatism, like limited government, are not inherently problematic, they cannot be taken out of context. Similarly, with Christianity, a lot of Christ's teachings appear in many of the world's religions and philosophies, but, especially in the United States, those teachings have been perverted in order to uphold hierarchies and false supremacy of certain groups while, quite literally, damning others, and being on the receiving end of that condemnation leaves very deep scars. Tolerance of such ideologies that promote supremacy of one class of person over another is not tolerance, but complicity.

Culturally, we are at a moment of civil unrest that is demanding change. The United States was undeniably built on systems that valued white Christian supremacy, and because of that any sort of rhetoric that longs for a return to "the good ol' days" is inherently hurtful to the people actively engaging in that struggle. The previous administration encouraged hate. It's figurehead openly said racist and misogynistic things that are well documented. The administration literally erased the LGBTQIA+ community from it's narrative. When it was ousted, the party was given an opportunity to change course, and instead has actively doubled down on that hate. It's a painful reminder of everything that we still have to accomplish in the fights for equality and justice.

Wanting everyone to get along is a lovely notion. In a world where everyone was on a level playing field and there were no injustices to be found, I would absolutely be right there with you, but we are at a moment of such obvious disparity that maintaining that false sense of neutrality is offering silent consent of the current power dynamics. When one side holds all the power, and you say you don't want to get involved, then the only logical expectation is that that side will retain power.

I hope this helps to maybe frame things in a different way. I honestly wish that no one would ever make you feel small for trying to spread a message of love and understanding. I also ask that you try to keep an open mind and offer empathy when people are speaking about their experiences and pain. Far too many of us are hurting.

With love, friend.

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consummate-deviant · 7 years ago

Text

The Character of Android 17

What’s up, friendos? So, Android 17 has been the toast of the town in Dragon Ball circles lately. Don’t get me wrong, that’s awesome and definitely deserved: the dude is unquestionably the MVP of the tournament of power, and if you try to say otherwise, I’ll… shrug and carry on with my day, I guess. You do you, I ain’t your dad.

No, but seriously, go to any discussion forum or comment section these days, and you’ll see plenty of people talking about how great and cool 17 was, and how he’s definitely shone more than any other during the current arc. I agree with the sentiment whole-heartedly, so we’re not here to discuss that, rather, I want to bring up some of the negativity that has come along with this newfound bump in fan appreciation.

See, where there’s hype, there must be backlash, and 17 has been subjected to plenty of that. With every more popular member of team universe 7 to be eliminated before him, the number of people bitter at his continued presence grew. This is fine, in and of itself, for the ‘not your dad’ reason I listed above, but there are two specific complaints I occasionally hear about 17 that I just can’t co-sign for you, and I decided to write this up to address them.

The first is: “He’s not even the same character he was! This guy doesn’t act anything like 17/has nothing in common with his DBZ incarnation”

the second is: “He’s boring/blank/bland! He has no personality.”

Since I’m one of the five people worldwide who listed Android 17 as his favorite character ever since the good ole days of Z, I figure the least I can do is roll up my sleeves and share some of the reasons I disagree with the above, as well as express how I see his actions and arc. We’ll go through the timeline of events he participated in, and see if we can’t parse together the delinquent he was with the chill park ranger he would become!

PART 1: A Reminder of the Android’s Origin and the Future Timeline

So, Android 17 was originally Lapis, a teenage delinquent who would often go out and rabble-rouse with his sister and his droogs, playing their rap music too loud, wearing pants with the waistband far lower than the waistband of pants should be allowed to hang in civilized society, and other stuff like that, I assume.

Unfortunately for the duo, Dr. Gero was about, looking for a team of teenagers with attitude he could convert into an armada of godless killing machines. One might feel prompted to ask why Gero intended to create machines so powerful that he couldn’t control them uness they wanted to listen to his orders, but sought the demographic of humans statistically least likely to ever listen to what an old man has to say to them to be the vessels of those machines, but this isn’t an essay about Gero being a silly, silly man.

Rather, the salient point to take out of the backstory we’re given is that 17 and 18 started out with a chip on their shoulder and a lack of love for people or society. We don’t get any info on their home life or their parents, but based on their choice of hobby, and the ease with which they were spirited away, we can safely assume there were no happy beginnings here. From the moment they became relevant to the universe of DB they were already in a position to hate society; being kidnapped by a madman and turned into cyborgs specifically to vent THAT madman’s hatred of society only exacerbated this, resulting in a mixture that basically burned the world to the ground.

Fast forward to some time later, and humans are an endangered species, Gohan has been disarmed, and Trunks has been brought to the verge of death. We don’t really learn a lot about the personalities of the future incarnation of the androids. They behaved like a pair of psychopathic children, destroying the world less because of any deeply held hatred or bloodlust, but more because it sounded like a fun idea and what else were they gonna do with their weekend? They share some elements of their character with the versions of themselves who would be proper cast members, which I’ll get to later, but for the purposes of the story they were more of a force of nature than anything.

It’s too late for the future… but not the entire multiverse! So Trunks head back to the past, but hold up, Jack! Would his warnings prove accurate?

Part 2: Android 17 in DBZ

The first thing we learn about android 17 is that he’s a troll. Seriously, not only is he quite sardonic in his disposal of his stepdad, the first interaction he has with the Z warriors, his nominal enemies, is to beckon Krillin over to him, then abruptly stand up and frighten him. No end game, no intent to harm, he just really wanted to screw with the poor guy. He’s a gadfly who frequently says and does things for no greater reason than to see the reaction they provoke in others.

The second thing we learn is that he shares his future incarnation’s flippant, whimsical attitude, but to a less morbid extreme. He makes short work of the assembled heroes, but treats it like clearing the arcade mode of a fighting game, stopping at the knockout and expressing a hope they may be more fun if he encounters them again. When 18 steps up to fight Vegeta, 17 reacts to it like a child whose sister beat him to calling dibs on the front seat during a car trip.

The third thing we learn is that he is one cocky little punk. He refers to himself as the ultimate warrior on multiple occasions, brags constantly about himself, and treats the notion of anyone being his rival, much less stronger than he is, as a notion so ridiculous that it doesn’t even deserve his contempt.

These three traits are important because they remain central to his disposition even as a grown man, albeit to a far more muted and mature degree, even though his personality does change quite a bit during the ten years we don’t see him. It may be tempting to say that being eaten by a bug man was what served to put a sock in his constant “I’m the best in the world” talk, and that certainly did play a role in who he became, but I would say his character started to change a little bit before that: during his fight with Piccolo.

The thing about 17’s strength is that it has nothing to do with martial prowess. As a delinquent he certainly had experience in street fights, but he never did any formal training, or did anything that would require effort or discipline. When Gero made 17 an android he made him so strong that he could crush anyone he encountered, but it was just that, raw strength. It had no technique or prowess behind it.

As the fight progresses, we see 17’s attitude toward Piccolo change subtly. At the start, he’s just a toy to be played with, another level in his game to be cleared and forgotten about, but as it progresses Piccolo does something that 17 had never encountered before: he holds his own. With skill and grace, he matches every move 17 has, blow for blow. In the past 17 had had many fights as a bully and a thug, but this was the first time in his life he did battle as a warrior, and he liked the feel of it. He expresses a kind of respect for piccolo as their fight reaches its end, even though it is couched in his trademark, planet-sized, ego. It was an encounter that took the first step toward redeeming him, and setting him down the path we would see him walking in Super.

...and then a bug ate him… Yeah, it’s hard to stay arrogant after you’ve been eaten by a bug, so that helped too. My big sticking point is that it’s often assumed that if Cell hadn’t screwed up the flow of events, the modern androids would have eventually became their future selves, but I think there’s a chance for their redemption even without Cell, provided at some point in time 18 meets Krillin and 17 fights the fused Kami-Piccolo.

Part 3: 17 in DBS and the Tournament of Power

Ten years pass, Android 17 is, if not in his thirties, pushing up close to ‘em for certain. His personality is now quite placid, and he’s a family man, carrying on 16’s spirit by protecting nature, and carrying on the fire that Piccolo lit in him a decade ago by training constantly to improve his technique. Now, I maintain that his character is still consistent, but does he BEHAVE differently now? Of course he does. Look, I don’t know how old you are, reader person, but I promise you, when more than a few seasons separate you from your teenage years, you will look back at who you were as a teenager, and the things you did… and you will cringe. Hard. Heck, I’m in my thirties now, and I look back at the things I said and did in my early twenties and cringe, sometimes. Growing older is a game of constantly realizing how ridiculous you used to be and hoping you’re less ridiculous now.

So yeah, he is more mature, but the three elements that are the center of his character are intact. He is a merciless gadfly throughout his entire run in Super. He exchanges affectionate barbs with his sister when he meets her daughter, he teases Krillin’s nervousness around him, despite expressing to Goku that he was fond of the man, and considered him his brother, and in general never openly acting like he took anything he encountered as seriously as he really did.

He still tends to treat everything around him like a giant game, made most evident by all of his interactions with Universe 2, but most of all with Ribrianne and her Kamikaze Fireballs, playing the role they provided him with abandon and gusto- when Ribrianne accused him of being a villain from some kind of magical girl anime… he promptly starts hamming it up and acting like a villain in some kind of magical girl anime!

He’s no longer the loud mouthed braggart he was as a teenager, sure, but his faith in himself remains strong. It’s just that it’s no longer childish, absolute arrogance, and instead has been tempered into a realistic confidence in his own abilities. When faced with insurmountable odds, he remains calm and studies his situation carefully, never moving recklessly, but also never losing faith in his ability to eventually find a way to overcome the situation he finds himself in.

The tournament of power DOES introduce an important arc to 17’s character, though, and it’s a surprisingly subtle one. Sadly, I’ve already typed up 2,000 words on the subject, so I’m going to go ahead and stop here for now. This is how I perceive the character, and why I like him so much. If anyone wants me to, I may type up the second essay on 17 I have rattling around in my head sometime, and reveal how 17 accomplishes something impossible: makes JIREN an interesting antagonist.

#dragon ball super #dragon ball z #android 17 #db super

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