#but it is still an “also ran” for that weird category

[21st-century-minutiae]

SpaghettiOs is a form of processed ready-to-heat pasta-esque meal made by Campbells, a company which makes a number of canned soups. Other companies offer similar 'off brand' versions of the dish.

The noodle rings are submerged in a sweet tomato and cheese sauce mixture inside an aluminum can. The can can be emptied directly into a pot and quickly heated on the stove with no further preparation.

Some variations of the dish include meatballs or sausage chunks inside the cans.

As a cheap, low preparation dish, this food serves as a similar niche as macaroni and cheese, as a quick meal for children or people who don't have the time/effort/energy/money for something of greater substance. It is not particularly healthy, nor is it of particularly notable quality, but many people find it satisfying.

A good number of people in the early twenty-first century would instantly recognize the dish, especially due to the prevalent late 20th century "Uh-oh! SpaghettiOs" ad campaign that was extremely common on children's programming.

[fingertipsmp3]

That school assembly post is bringing back so many buried memories lol

[moltengoldveins]

ok but I have Thoughts about the way Minecraft usernames translate to actual names, both irl and in fanfic. They’re definitely ‘obsessed with structure and grumpy at inconsistency flavor autism’ thoughts but still. I find it weird how we cut and paste the media we’re given to fit what we view as functional worldbuilding, and how that gets screwy when translating online names.

like, you’re working with several categories here. The person’s actual real name, their irl nickname, their gamer tag, a name possibly contained by or possibly the entirety of that gamer tag, and any extra pieces or symbols in the gamer tag. And you have the weird situation where those categories might not easily translate to a ‘First Name Last Name’ structure. For an example, we’ve got Phil Watson, who’s gamer tag is ‘Ph1LzA,’ and is called Philza Minecraft or Philza. The ‘Minecraft last name’ is a…. Bit? A joke? A reference to a bit of lore? It’s unclear. The ‘Za’ bit was put there for flair and is now an integral part of his name. Sometimes it’s his last name. Sometimes his real last name is chucked in there. the 1 in his actual username is literally never referenced in nicknames or fic it’s like it’s not even there. But that’s a simple one. What about Tubbo_? because we call him Tubbo Underscore. Like. We say the ‘_’ aloud. Why do we do that. What has possessed us to make that decision? What about FitMC? I’ve usually heard it said ‘Fit Emsee.’ Why say that, and not say ‘Minecraft? That’s not even really a last name, it’s just like…. His full first name. Fit is used more like a shortened nickname. BadBoyHalo. Like. ‘Bad boy’ is a slang term, not a name. It would make the most sense to call him Halo, that’s the distinct noun in the name, the term the ‘bad boy’ bit is referring to. Like ‘GoodTimesWithScar’ but noooo. Bad. Halo is usually a last name, if it’s there at all. Skeppy on the other hand is… just his name. No last name ever. Technoblade is also weird. Technoblade is his full name. We call him that. We ALSO call him ‘Techno,’ and use Blade as a last name. We also use Blade as a title. What the heck. GeminiTay. We call her Gem. We use Tay as a last name sometimes. Her name is a Zodiac constellation. Literally nowhere I’m have I seen that affect her naming conventions. IJevin. We just… remove the I. For everything. This wouldn’t bother me except we don’t do it with everyone and I’m starting to get annoyed by the inconsistency. GoodTimesWithScar. Ok. This one also bugs me. Like, most fics call him Scar Goodtimes when they need a name. I’m not gonna dig into it but that’s…. Why? Why that? Grian never gets a last name. Ranboo sometimes gets chopped into Ran and Boo but usually he’s an Underscore or he’s last nameless. Wilbur Soot functions wonderfully (until the get involved shhhh) but it’s too close to his real name it gets very confusing.

anyway, all of this sucks, I hate it all, we’re a terrible fandom /hj

all that nonsense aside, yknow who has a functional Firstname Lastname username? It’s even got a space, and proper capitals: Mumbo Jumbo. That’s who. Look at that. It’s perfect. Everyone should be more like Mumbo Jumbo. Thank you and good night.

.

Edit: I know about Ranboo Beloved and Grian Dreamslayer and the various other characters whose names I didn’t mention perfectly in this post. This was no piece of journalism, this was an old man shouts at cloud meme personified. I was very overstimulated and this was what happened to catch my autistic ire. I’m not upset, just figured I’d clarify, a lot of people seem distressed at my not mentioning Beloved. Hope y’all are having a lovely day 💜

[call-me-strega]

Dc x Dp Prompt #24: The Midwest Prince(ss)

Danny is a Singer/Siren/Banshee au where he’s basically a Chappel Roan-type figure.( Also, I'm Dead on Main trash so Strangers-to-Friends-to-Lovers, Celebrity x Civilian romance for two of my favorite boys)

Danny’s Ghostly Wail develops into vocal manipulation bc he’s a siren or banshee. Ember teaches him to sing and control the power. He finds music is a good outlet for his emotions and decides to pursue music as Danny. It takes him a few years but he develops a style and brand that he bases off the Realms. However, he doesn’t anyone to connect him to Phantom so he uses parts of his ancestors’ names to become “Walker Gale”(shout out to my beautiful mutual @mirigold-mayflowers for helping me pick that name), ordinary small-town midwestern boy turned Music Icon. He hires Val as his personal bodyguard, Sam as his manager, and Tucker as his head stage tech.

He dresses in really campy clothes the low-key mimic his ghost form as well as other ghosts he’s met. The outfits change to match the vibe of the song. So a rock ballad with an outfit inspired by Ember, Show Tunes-Murder Mystery-type-beat with a costume for Amorpho, EDM-techno-hyperpop themed song styled after Technus or Skulker, etc. He just has a lot of fun experimenting with his appearance and he’s an icon for it. He even makes friends with Star and Paulina through this and they give him feedback and help with new looks. The eventually join the team as his PR and Styling team.

Since he’s a banshee/siren all his songs have this underlying despair/sadness even if they have a fun and bubbly beat. He also references his feelings about being/hiding as Phantom and being partially dead and shit but vaguely so no one actually knows or assumes it’s a metaphor. Many of the themes are actually things lgbtq people identify with, specifically trans and bi fans. He also references battles he’s fought and ppl assumes he’s talking about mental illness or abuse which attracts another category of fans altogether. Again inspired by Chappel Roan his first album his called "The Ascent and Downfall of a Midwest Prince" gaining him the nickname the "Midwest Prince".

He’s weird and unfiltered and full of emotion and he gains a few fans in the hero community too. Raven and Zatanna start a fan club for him, well aware he’s some type of banshee/siren but knowing that the extent of his powers are being used to deliver beautiful performances. The are staunch supporters of him and his music and spread it to their friends. The current fan club is Co-Presidents Zatanna + Raven, VP Greta(Secret, a.k.a: a ghost hero), Starfire, Bart, Cassie, Tim, Kon + Jon, Steph, Cass, and Billy.

His identifying features are a signature make-up look and white underdye (when the color is on the underside of the hair). He’s grown his hair longer so it’s not super visible when he has it down and not styled. He also looks different without make-up so he can totally go unrecognized in public and live life semi-normal (as normal as a half-ghost vigilante powerhouse superstar can be). He actually planned it to be that way so that he could still go to college and stuff even though he’s doing it mostly online. All this to say that Danny has low-key got a Hannah Montana thing going on. Also, let's mix it up a bit and say he's based in Star City.

One day Danny goes to a second-hand book store because he's looking for a cheap textbook when he bumps into an absolute hunk of a man who doesn't seem to recognize him. Jason had been in Star City to visit Roy and Lian. He stopped at a second-hand bookstore to see if he look for some older editions of books (one time he found a second edition copy of Persuasion so he likes to peruse) and ran into a super pretty boy who made his chest feel funny and doesn't realize he's a Wayne. They got to talking about started really connecting. They decided to exchange numbers and kept in touch, meeting up every now and then when they had the chance. Danny gave him his private social media accounts so Jason never learned much more beyond that Danny worked in the music industry but not his exact role in it.

Eventually Danny moves to Gotham, either bc he switched labels or to be closer to Jazz whose doing her doctorate thesis on reforms that need to be made in Arkham. He and Jason begin meeting up in person more frequently and start catching feelings. Danny really wants to ask him out but feels sleazy doing it without telling Jason about his past and superstar alter ego. However, he also doesn't want to lose the mostly normal friendship they have. On the flipside Jason wants to date Danny but doesn't want to drag him into the life of a vigilante or the life of a Wayne. Both of them Pine and Agonize over this. In the end Danny decides to bite the bullet and tell Jason who he is, every part of who he is. He invites Jason over for a movie night and tells him he's got something important to tell Jason.

That same day Starfire decides to introduce Walker Gale's work to the other Outlaws and Jason really resonates with his work. He identifies with the lyrics on a literal and physical level and recognizes the underlying emotions that usually only other ghosts or liminals can. Starfire overjoyed that her friend likes his music decides to show Jason some of his music videos and photos. Jason, not being blind or an idiot, recognizes not only the props and costumes but his crushes face under that (very well done) make-up.

Jason is stunned and conflicted: it’s not like Danny lied to him about who he was, but he was entirely truthful either. Did he assume Jason knew? Or did he just not trust Jason? Why did he even bother with Jason, a seemingly regular guy, if he had such a claim to fame? And Jason keeps listening to his music and it’s speaks to him the same way hanging out with Danny does, making him feel seen and connected. It makes him all the more sure that someone incredible as Danny doesn’t need someone like Jason. He heads to Danny’s place that night very subdued.

He gets to Danny’s place and the smile that greets him twists him up inside. He puts on a mask and tries to act normal but Danny can tell somethings up but persists as he has made up his mind to be clear with Jason. He sits him down and tells him there is something important he wants to tell Jason. He starts by letting Jason know that he cares about him very much and appreciates the normality and closeness of their friendship. He confesses that he doesn't normally get that bc well, he's the superstar "Walker Gale". Danny goes onto say that the reason he didn't say anything earlier was because he treasures the simplicity of what he had with Jason and the reason he's telling him now is because he couldn't continue a relationship that he wants more from without being completely honest.

Jason's heart thunders in his chest and he stares at Danny with a slightly constipated look. Danny asks Jason what's wrong and on an impulse Jason word vomits his feelings. That he actually found out through a friend earlier today, that he really connected to his music the same way he did with Danny, that he's never felt seen the way Danny sees through him, that he's never felt the same way as deeply before, that he's completely and utterly in love with Danny but was scared to say anything and get him involved with his crazy life and the Waynes. And Danny sits and listens shellshocked.

And the only thing Danny can think to do is kiss this incredible boy senseless and tell him that if he likes him back then they can figure it out.

[happy74827]

Pink Palace

[Luke Riordan x Female!Reader]

Synopsis: You finally decided to let Luke visit your dorm room, and let’s just say… he wasn’t expecting what was hidden inside (GIF Credits: @crimsoncountess)

WC: 2013

Category: Fluff

I’ve wanted to write more for Gen V for a while now, and with my friend producing ideas (love you @summerrivera777777), I finally wrote a Luke fic since I both love and miss him so much. Unproblematic king 🙌

And what better way to write him with a little fluff 😏

『••✎••』

You and Luke have been going steady since the beginning of the new term. You’ve been very close since day one and have been best friends before you two decided to date. Even when you two have been together, you guys were never apart. He was the perfect boyfriend; he was always there for you. The only thing was that you were very… new to all of this.

You’ve never really been with anyone before. Luke was your first boyfriend and your first kiss, and that was only a month ago. Luke was also the first boy to show interest in you. You were the girl who would rather study and hang out with her friends, the girls. But when Luke came along, your whole world turned upside down. He was Golden Boy, the number 1 hero of the school, the guy every girl wanted.

And now you were dating him.

Even after months into your relationship, you still couldn't believe that this was happening. That a guy as handsome, smart, kind, and strong would ever want to be with someone like you. But he did, and it felt like heaven. He treated you like you were his world.

That still went without saying that you were a nervous wreck. There were certain things you made a big deal out of, even though Luke had done them hundreds of times. Such as, when he would wrap his arms around your waist, he would pull you closer to him, making your chest push up against his. It drove you crazy because you weren't used to it. Your heart would always beat a million times per minute, and you could feel the heat rising to your cheeks. You would always stutter over your words, making you look like an idiot.

It wasn't just that, though. You didn’t even let him near your dorm room. You’d gone to his dorm on rare occasions, but whenever he tried to take you to your room, you would make some sort of excuse and get him to leave.

It was a stupid thing; you knew it, but you couldn’t help it. Call it embarrassment, call it anxiety, call it what you will. You couldn’t help the way you felt. Today, though, was a little different. You were starting to realize how stupid you were being and wanted to change that. You didn’t want to have your nerves take over anymore; you wanted to feel what everyone else felt, no matter how embarrassing it was.

Today was the day. You and Luke were going to be alone together in your dorm, and nothing was going to get in the way.

You were a mess the whole day, even fumbling in your English class. You never fumbled during English class, not even when you were taking a test. It was the one class that was always easy for you, and yet, today, you were a train wreck.

After the final bell rang, signaling the end of the day, you headed back to your dorm room to clean up. You were lucky enough that your roommate, a girl named Aiko, had some study sessions (it definitely wasn’t a study session) with her friends, which gave you the whole room to yourself.

You started by straightening up a little bit. Not too much, though. It would seem weird if your room were completely cleaned out of the mess that had accumulated throughout the semester. Once the room looked decent, you moved on to your desk, shoving the clutter out of the way and onto the floor, or in the drawers, or under your bed. It didn't matter where they went, just as long as they were out of sight.

With your desk finally clean, you moved on yourself. You ran your hands through your hair, hoping it looked good, then pulled out a tube of lip gloss and spread it onto your lips. You smacked your lips together, hoping the color would look nice. Once you were satisfied, you went back into the bathroom and grabbed your makeup bag, dumping it onto your bed and sifting through it until you found what you were looking for. Mascara and eyeshadow.

After putting it on, you decided to change. You didn’t want to look too gaudy, just enough to look decent. You put on a pink cami, then pulled on a white crop top that had the sleeves cut off and the collar lined with lace. You took off your skirt and replaced it with a pair of jeans.

You were definitely overthinking this, you thought. What you were wearing was perfectly fine. Nothing was out of place. Yet here you were, acting as though Luke was that rich auntie who nitpicked every single thing you did.

You sat at the foot of your bed, letting out a heavy sigh and rubbing your eyes. You needed to calm down. It’s Luke, your boyfriend, not the queen of England.

A knock on the door pulled you out of your thoughts. You froze, wondering if that was Luke or your roommate. You didn't move, waiting for another knock, but you were only met with silence.

You jumped off the bed, making your way towards the door and slowly opening it. It was Luke, of course, smiling down at you with his perfect pearly white teeth. His smile always made you weak in the knees.

"Hey, gorgeous," he greeted, leaning in to peck your lips. “Got your text. Ready to go?”

Oh, right. The lie you told him. You were “planning” on going to brunch together. To… catch up and talk about whatever couples talk about. You honestly had no idea. When you asked him, it was all but word vomit. He agreed, of course. A little suspicious but still happy.

“Uhm, yeah, about that—” you began, rubbing the back of your neck nervously, a sheepish grin on your face.

He gave you a concerned look. "Is something wrong?"

"I— uh..." you couldn't bring yourself to tell him. It was so stupid. So, so stupid. “We’re not going to brunch.”

He gave you a confused look, his eyebrows furrowing slightly. He was wearing his white pullover, the one that made his arms look even better, and his hands were stuffed into the front pockets of his dark jeans. He was giving you his full attention, his body leaning slightly forward.

"We're not?" He was suspicious, but his tone was sweet.

You shook your head, chewing the inside of your cheek. You felt your cheeks getting warm, so you covered your mouth, trying to hide your face.

"No... uh, I thought we could... stay in. Y-You know, like, watch a movie and have snacks or something." You were trying so hard to get the words out.

His look of concern was replaced with a grin. "Like a movie night?"

"Yeah. We can do that."

He smiled. “Alright, I got a TV I think we can use. I just need—”

Ugh, he was so nice. You couldn’t have him do all the work.

You cut him off. "Luke, as much as I love your movie taste, I would really like to pick the movie for tonight. And, if it's okay, I think my room would be a lot more comfortable.

"Yeah, sure. No problem. I'll just… wait, what? Your room?" His smile disappeared, and a worried expression was replaced with it.

You nodded, your hands clasped together. You were squeezing your hands so tight your knuckles were turning white. You were so scared, so nervous, and the way he was looking at you was not helping.

"Are you sure?" He asked, his voice quiet. God, he was so worried about you. It was so sweet yet so nerve-wracking.

You nodded and took a deep breath. "I'm sure. I mean, I think it's about time. We've been together for months now, and I’ve never invited you in before."

"I know, and that's perfectly fine. I don't mind. We don't have to rush into anything."

"I know, but I'm tired of being such a stupid baby and making such a big deal out of nothing."

Luke laughed. "You're not a stupid baby."

"You say that now," you mumbled, "But, seriously, Luke. I'm ready."

"And that's fine," he said, "But I'm just worried. I don't want to do anything that'll make you uncomfortable.

"Luke, you've never made me uncomfortable. I’m just uncomfortable with myself."

He reached forward, cupping your face and making you look up at him. His touch was gentle and reassuring, his gaze soft. "I can't imagine why because I think you're amazing."

He was too sweet.

"Luke," you whined.

"I'm serious," he replied, pressing his forehead against yours, "And if you're sure you're ready, then… movie night it is."

You smiled, nodding, "Okay."

He leaned forward and kissed your lips softly, and it felt as though he was trying to comfort you. You closed your eyes, letting out a quiet sigh, and reached up to wrap your hands around his wrists. He tilted his head, kissing you a little deeper, and pulled away with a quiet smack.

With another breath, you opened your eyes and took his hands, pulling him into your room. His eyes immediately get captured by the small space, the walls decorated with posters and pictures. The bed was neatly made, the pink and white sheets matching the pillows and the duvet. The desk was neat, the clutter hidden away, and the closet door was closed, hiding the clothes and shoes that were probably all over the floor.

“I… oh, wow.” Luke was in a daze. “It’s so…”

“Clean?” You offered, a slight chuckle escaping your lips.

He shook his head, a smile on his face. "It's so... Pink.”

You snorted, closing the door. "That's the first thing you noticed?"

"Well, it's like a pink explosion. You didn't strike me as the type to have a lot of pink stuff."

"I wear pink every day."

"Yeah, but that's a color. Not… this." He gestured towards the whole room.

You frowned that nervousness returning to you. You thought the color was nice. Was he not a fan of pink? Did he not like it?

"Is that bad?" You asked, wringing your hands.

Like a switch was turned on, his eyes widened, and he was suddenly aware of his words. Be aware of what they did to you. "No! Oh my god, no, no. I think it's lovely. Very fitting."

You sighed, letting the worry wash away from you. Thank god. Overthinking things was something you always did, but at least it was easy to get you out of that mindset.

You sat on the edge of the bed, patting the spot next to you. Luke joined you, wrapping his arm around your waist. He pulled you closer, pressing his lips to your temple, then to the side of your head, then to your cheek. You giggled, swatting him away playfully.

"I like the pink, I promise," he assured, "It's just not what I'm used to seeing."

You smiled. "Thanks. I'm glad you like it."

"I think I have the perfect movie for tonight."

"Oh, yeah? What's that?"

"Legally…” He paused for dramatic effect, "Blonde."

You snorted. "Does my room have anything to do with your choice?"

"Maybe. Maybe not."

"Whatever you say, Riordan."

He grinned, pecking your lips once again. Soft, like Luke. He was always soft. Always so gentle and careful. And he always treated you like you were the most delicate thing. It was endearing.

You were still nervous. Your heart was still beating fast, but not as much as before. The longer he stayed, the longer the movie played, the calmer you became. You were finally relaxed.

Overthinking things was a part of you, unfortunately. But it was always easier when Luke was around. You couldn't help the anxiety that built up, but with him there, everything felt better.

You knew, with time, you would learn to trust yourself. It was only a matter of time. And you had the best boyfriend to help you.

[kieonu]

boyfie! yuta okkotsu x cosplayer! reader

gender-neutral reader

category: sfw, fluff(?), yuta's a very supportive bf !!

cw: none !!

boyfie! yuta who was surprised when you told him you're a cosplayer. he just came over to your place one day in the early stages of your relationship, unannounced, and had a question mark on his head when you opened the door in full cosplay

boyfie! yuta who admires and compliments you every time you cosplay. sparkles and hearts fill his eyes as he watches you parade around your place in cosplay. he wonders how he's gotten such an attractive s/o

boyfie! yuta who learns the rules of photography to assist you in taking your cosplay photos. he's willing to do whatever it takes to help you get the shots you like ! even if it does make him look silly in public (he's definitely feeling embarrassed), but it's worth it !! 

boyfie! yuta who works on creating small photoshoot sets for you. he works as if he's getting paid for quality work and not by the hour. wanna do a simple underwater shoot for just your upper body? he's got you. he's watched enough cosplay tip videos beforehand just for this. although this, there are some times where he physically cannot create an entire set for you, so he'll contribute to renting out a studio just for these shoots !! 

boyfie! yuta who gets jealous easily. after the first few times you've cosplayed a couple with another cosplayer, his heart couldn't handle it anymore. he then offered to cosplay couples with you !! he'll cosplay no matter the character and costume details (need me someone like this </3) 

boyfie! yuta who feels awkward posing as a couple in character whilst getting photos taken. he eventually warms up and gets used to taking photos, though he's still very shy

boyfie! yuta always attends conventions and cosplay events with you. he's there to hold whatever you purchase (he's your #1 gofer) and have whatever you need. water? of course he's got it. a piece of your costume keeps slipping? he's got tape for a quick fix !! a solo cosplayer wants to take a photo with you? he'll take the photo !! truly the best support boyfriend ever

boyfie! yuta who's eyes widen and feels a little sense of panic when someone asks him for a photo. his nerves calm and agrees when he sees you smile at him, encouraging him to take the photo. if they ask him for his socials (most likely to tag him in the photo once they post it later), he'll give them your social. he's gotta support his partner as much as he can, even if it means giving people a different person's social. close enough though, right? 

boyfie! yuta who would slip away while you're in the bathroom at the convention to buy something you were eyeing earlier. he then runs back to the bathroom just so you don't suspect him to have wandered off

"why are you breathing so heavily?" 

"it got a little hot here earlier as a large wave of people walked by. it seems to have calmed down though so no worries ("⌒▽⌒) ". totally not because he ran across the cramped artist alley, nooooo.. he would give you what he bought you when you guys get home and have a little haul for the day. he'd also be just as excited over the things you bought

boyfie! yuta who walks behind you to make sure no creeps try to take weird photos of you as they pass by. don't worry about him getting lost though, he's holding your hand :D. for a pretty shy guy, he likes to hold your hand in public to show that you already have a lover and anyone else can back off

boyfie! yuta who secretly takes photos of you while walking or when you're staring off somewhere after the convention. walking to a restaurant nearby? he's snapped a photo of you. your resting on the railing on a balcony? he took the perfect photo that he'll later set as his lockscreen

boyfie! yuta who loves his s/o so much and would do anything for them. he loves supporting you in anything you do !!

nsfw edition here

[rizzyu]

this is so weird but

yk that tiktok art video of grimace crying because people are throwing up his shake? i saw it and now im crying

do you mind writing how luxiem would react to their s/o or friend crying when they see the vid?

When You Cryge About Grimace HC  

Pairing: Vox, Mysta, Luca, Ike, Shu x gn! reader

Category: Comfort, fluff

Warning: uh NO

Summary: How would Luxiem react when you started crying after watching a Tiktok art video of Grimace sadging about his shakes getting thrown up.

A/N: HOLY FREAKING COW I’M NOT DEAD- anyways sorry that took so long thx for the request buddy chum pal :) (I totally wasn’t running out of ideas in the process)

Also bye bye Mysta we love you :(

After a long day, you slumped onto the bed. You took out your phone and began scrolling through Tiktok. That was when you came across an art video about the recent Grimace Shake trend. Grimace was upset that people were puking his milkshake and started crying. You sat there, watching the video and began feeling sorry for the purple mascot. So much that tears began brimming in your eyes, before falling onto the bedsheets as you blink. Just then, you beloved (member name) walked into your bedroom to let you know that they had just ran a bath for you. As they stepped in the room they saw you sitting at the edge of the bed, sniffling while having an arm over your eyes...

Vox Akuma

Walked over to you to lift your chin, making you face him

"Darling what happened? Is something wrong?" He spoke to you gently while wiping away the tears on your face tenderly

Oh man your heart went inserts holy music AaaaAAAAaaaAaaaaAAAaaAaaA from how loving he was with you

BARKS-

When you told him about the video, he smiled, and placed a hand on your head

"Don't cry, I bet Grimace would be glad to know that you're crying for him."

You looked up at his face as your tears slowly subdued, before you smiled warmly at him

And then inhales C U D D L E S

Mysta Rias

Starts to panic

"YO WHAT- WHAT HAPPENED? ARE YOU HURT? DID SOMEBODY BULLY YOU? DID I DO SOMETHING WRONG???"

To be completely honest, you were now more concerned about Mysta than crying for Grimace

After calming him down, you told him about the video of Grimace you saw

"BAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAH BRO YOU WERE CRYING FOR GRIMACE??" WHEEEEEZE

Your face:    •̄ _ •̄

After laughing his ass off, he'd buy you a Grimace shake to make up for it

Luca Kaneshiro

Committed sonic speed to your side

And started frantically asking if you were ok, what happened etc...

Possibility of Luca shaking you frantically as well: 80%

He'd also be ready to threaten whoever made you cry at GUNPOINT

But when he found out that you were crying for Grimace, he'd be flUTTEring on the inside from how sweet you were

But he'd still wanna cheer you up because you're his POGCHAMP and you're so POG and POG AND POOOOOGGGGG

So to properly celebrate Grimace's birthday, you two decided to order 2 Grimace shakes

Wishing Grimace a happy birthday, you took a sip, only to find that the shake is actually quite good 〃°o°〃

Ike Eveland

Rushed over to you and gave you huggies while asking you what happened

You'd probably shed even more tears from seeing how lovingly and worried his gaze was on you

After you had calmed down, you told Ike about the Tiktok video of Grimace you saw and how sorry you were for Grimace

Ike couldn't help but curl his lips up to a gentle smile, knowing how sweet you were to shed tears for someone else

He'd then whisper affirmative words to you and try to cheer you up while cuddling you

Might have Grimace shakes later (with some caviar toast on the side ≖‿≖)

Shu Yamino

Went over to hug you and help you wipe away your tears

You told him about the Grimace video and he chuckled while stroking your hair

"No need to cry babe, how about we celebrate Grimace's birthday together later? Besides, it's not good to cry so much"

He'd try to cheer you up with jokes (works everytime  ˘◡˘ )

"Hey babe have you ever heard of grima? GRIMA BALLS"

So there you go, making dumb jokes in the middle of the night while sipping on your ordered Grimace shakes

[steddieas-shegoes]

first off i just wanna say im loving everything youve written for ppls requests! how do u feel abt jock el? i feel like she maybe wouldnt understand sports at first and might struggle w the rules and fair play, but ends up really loving physical activity that has nothing to do w her powers, just her own hard work and sweat and skills she’s honed through practice all by herself, and the experience of being on a team. i can totally imagine her getting super competitive too, and being a super aggressive player in literally every sport. also, hopper is definitely the parent who yells at the referee and coaches during his kids games.

also i hope your day is going well whenever you see this!

Okay this was cuuuuuute. I really love the idea of El fitting in so well with sports people, but still never leaving her little group of nerds and badasses. I also love her just naturally being so good at every sport she tries because she is deeply in touch with what her body is capable of because of her powers, but never once using them. I maybe threw Wayne in a bit more than anyone would expect because I will always find a reason to do that. Also, this is a weird coincidence, but the Olympic swim trials for 2024 will take place in Indianapolis.- Mickala ❤️

-------------------------------------------------------

When things settle down, El goes back to school with everyone.

It’s hard at first. She never really fit in before, and she definitely doesn’t fit in now that people have seen official government security pretty much standing guard over her.

Even after they left, people still whispered when she ran errands with Joyce or Hop and went out with the rest of the party.

But she was determined to have as normal a life as she could, and that meant going to school.

High school here was better, even with the weird looks and silent bullies.

She had her friends.

She also had gym.

In California, she’d hated gym. She didn’t like getting dressed in front of everyone so she always got in trouble for taking too long. The girls in her class usually found ways to be lazy and she didn’t want to make herself more of an outcast, so she just didn’t participate most of the time.

But here, Lucas was in her gym class. So was Will, though he was a little hopeless when it came to anything beyond walking the mile.

Max was excused from gym for the rest of high school if she wanted.

Hard to argue with a letter from the literal President.

Mike and Dustin had a different period, but that was fine since they hated gym.

El didn’t hesitate to participate here.

She ran the fastest mile, always had the most push ups and pull ups, won every tetherball game. Her team always won volleyball and softball. She won every category in swimming.

The only sport she didn’t play was basketball, much to Steve’s disappointment and Lucas’ secret delight.

The coach recruited her for every sport he could, insisted that she could be the type of player that brings them championship wins.

Hopper was ecstatic, of course, especially when he saw how much El loved it.

She knew better than to use any powers, especially in competitions, but she was so naturally good, it didn’t even cross her mind that she could.

She was physically stronger than most other girls her age, and had already had so much done to her body that she could easily push through a little exhaustion during the 500 meter butterfly race or playing the entire soccer game with only one break.

She watched baseball games with Wayne and Hopper, asked if she could play.

Hopper had her signed up for softball the next day.

She saw a beach volleyball match during the Olympics and asked to play.

Hopper took her to tryouts for the school team as soon as he possibly could.

She made the swim team, made captain within a month. Steve was ecstatic, especially when she won against him every time they did a practice race. Eddie and Will were judges, and El was pretty sure it was just to see Steve shirtless, but she didn’t really mind.

She was having fun.

She was using her natural abilities to get out some of her aggression in a safe way according to Dustin.

Everyone came to her games and meets, but no one was as loud as her dad.

He was on his feet more than he was in his seat, usually pacing and yelling at refs and judges from the stands. Most people didn’t seem to care, or at least didn’t want to say anything to the reinstated police chief.

Steve was always there to remind him that El was learning, and that that was actually a penalty or that the judge was being fair on her tie with another girl in the butterfly.

Even as good as she was at just about every sport she tried, she struggled with some rules. Once they were explained in a way she understood, she was careful, but it cost her volleyball team a win in the process.

Steve helped her understand what he could, or took her to the library to look things up if he didn’t know. Wayne helped her understand the differences between softball and baseball while Eddie tried to take notes in the corner.

Actual notes.

“It’s so I know if she does good!” He explained when Wayne raised his brow at him showing interest in a sport.

To his credit, he immediately lost the notes he took and still had to ask Steve a bunch of questions at her next game.

She earned the MVP awards for every sport she played, gaining more positive attention than she’d expected. It was welcome, especially since it made a lot of people forget about the negative attention surrounding her the last few years.

Will designed shirts for everyone for her games and had Eddie get them printed at the same place he got the Hellfire Club ones made. They all wore them happily, too proud of her to not show all their support.

——————

Her senior year was when it hit that she had decisions to make.

She’d done fine in school; not straight A’s but never failed a class.

Sports are where she excelled.

But senior year was hard, and schedules were difficult enough without having to balance two sports at once immediately followed by two more.

The coaches did their best to offer accommodations since she was their star, but she didn’t like that. She didn’t want to be treated as “other.” That wasn’t why she did this.

So she dropped softball, much to Wayne’s heartbreak. He still smiled at her and said he was proud of everything she’d accomplished and hoped she’d still find time to come throw the ball with him.

She dropped volleyball in the spring, used the excuse that she needed to focus on swimming because she had scouts interested in giving her scholarships and the Olympic committee showed interest in recruiting her for Team USA.

Steve let her use his pool for extra practice, and usually joined her on the weekends for a morning swim, even on the still too cold mornings in February and March.

She held the Hawkins High and Indiana state records in most categories, and Midwest and National records in a few of those.

The olympic committee invited her to trials, and of course she’d enlisted Steve as her personal coach.

She trained for hours every day, Steve pushed her just enough using his new knowledge of the requirements she would have to meet to make the team and her competition.

She didn’t want everyone there, only Steve and Hopper.

She was worried having them there would put too much pressure on her and now wasn’t the time to perform poorly.

The morning of the trials, Steve let her cuddle up to his side on the couch.

“You’re ready.”

“That is not a question.”

“No, because I’m not asking. I know you’re ready,” he smiled when she rolled her eyes.

“I am ready.”

She was.

She outdid herself, actually. She ended up breaking her own record in her first event, and tied her own record in the second event.

She not only made the team, but was named captain almost immediately, the rest of her teammates incredibly excited to be on her team.

Hawkins had a parade for her, Hawkins High had a pep rally, the family had a huge party for her.

She still had to graduate high school, still competed on the high school swim team, even found time to be a lifeguard at the city pool every Friday and Saturday afternoon.

El had found her place.

—------------------------------

When USA won gold in every event for swimming, no one was surprised.

It’s hard to beat a team led by El.

She accepted a full ride scholarship to Purdue University, where she broke all their school records and got her degree in Physical Therapy so that she could work with athletes.

She competed in the Olympics again, winning gold in four events, silver in one.

But she always had her family there. They came from all over the country to watch, to support, wearing the same shirts that Will made years ago.

[justinsentertainmentcorner]

Alissa Wilkinson at Vox:

The Hollywood writers strike marked its one-month anniversary on Friday, with no signs of slowing down. While other guilds in the industry are still on the job — except when they’re blocked by picket lines — the writers may soon get company on those picket lines.

Two other major entertainment guilds, the Directors Guild of America (DGA) and Screen Actors Guild (SAG-AFTRA), also entered the summer with looming contract expiration dates. Both groups’ agreements with AMPTP, the trade association that represents the industry’s film and TV production companies, end on June 30. A lot could happen between now and then, but the situation is looking dicey.

All of that means that come July 1, the studios may be facing a double or even triple strike, in effect shutting Hollywood down completely.

The DGA rarely strikes — the last time was in 1987 — and its leadership has not called for a strike authorization vote. But its relations with the AMPTP have been trickier than usual. Negotiations began on May 10, with demands that in part mirror the WGA’s concerns. The main sticking point is wage and residual increases that keep in step with rising costs of living. In particular, lower residuals for shows on streaming services, where the lion’s share of entertainment now lives, have wreaked havoc for many people in the industry, drastically reducing compensation and making it increasingly difficult to just pay the bills.

In the past, the DGA has sometimes managed to make an agreement with AMPTP ahead of the start of bargaining, effectively setting a pattern for the WGA and SAG-AFTRA to follow in their own demands. Last November, the DGA sent a “pre-negotiation” offer to the AMPTP, seeking resolution ahead of bargaining. The AMPTP reportedly rejected the DGA’s proposal, meaning both parties came to the bargaining table without an arrangement.

The situation seemed to intensify due to an unforced error. On May 23, Warner Bros. Discovery launched Max, its newly rebranded streaming platform, which had previously been named HBO Max. Eagle-eyed observers noticed that in listed credits, the platform lumped writers, directors, producers, and so on into one category labeled “creators.” Aside from the queasy implications that the greatest works of cinema and television were just “content,” the choice on the company’s part ran afoul of hard-fought contract regulations regarding credits for artists.

It was a weird choice, and one that set blood boiling in Hollywood. The presidents of the WGA and the DGA issued a rare joint statement, with DGA president Lesli Linka Glatter noting that “The devaluation of the individual contributions of artists is a disturbing trend and the DGA will not stand for it. We intend on taking the strongest possible actions, in solidarity with the WGA, to ensure every artist receives the individual credit they deserve.”

By the end of the day, Warner Bros. Discovery announced that it would modify how credits were listed on the platform in compliance with its preexisting contract agreement with the unions. Yet the strong language indicated that the DGA was ready to play hardball.

Meanwhile, members of SAG-AFTRA have been vocally supportive of the WGA. This is no shock, since on top of the same issue of residuals and wages, the union — which includes, in addition to film and TV actors, people who work in radio, singers, voice actors, influencers, models, and other media professionals — is concerned about the existential threat posed by AI and other technologies. Even before the WGA’s strike began, SAG-AFTRA issued statements regarding how the use of AI could eliminate or greatly reduce work for its members.

Members of SAG-AFTRA have shown up on picket lines to support the writers, and the star power posed by some of its most prominent members helps bring attention to the WGA’s strike. It’s also an effort to remind the studios that when their own negotiations begin, they’re ready for a fight. Underlining that implicit statement, the leadership of SAG-AFTRA unanimously agreed to ask its membership for a strike authorization vote, which concludes this coming Monday, June 5. That’s a move designed to signal solidarity to the AMPTP ahead of negotiations.

[...]

Here’s what’s most significant about all of this: All three unions have never gone on strike at the same time, in the history of Hollywood. The fact that this scenario is possible, even likely, emphasizes how extraordinary this moment is in the entertainment business. 

Hollywood could be on the verge of a triple strike that could effectively shut down everything completely. The WGA strike is ongoing, but the SAG-AFTRA and/or the Directors Guild could also launch their own strikes.

[starxsstuff]

HOBIE X FEM BLACK READER HEADCANNONS

[Now playing] Lovers rock -TV GIRL

🎸- He definitely calls you "luv"

🎸- He seems all chill and "nonchalant" in public but in private he's the biggest lover boy ever

🎸- Will come up with the dumbest excuses to touch you

🎸- going from the last HC,he's just NEEDS to be touching you in some way

🎸-Will make other guys know your his

🎸-JEALOUS

🎸-You would send him weird crap in the middle of the night and he'd just roll with it

🎸- Your Contact on his phone is "My tune Or My melody" (don't even think about it Sanrio fans.)

-Fluff-

[Now playing] My My-Chenayder(I love this song sm)

🎸-if he had to meet your parents he would poop bricks and stay close to you the whole time

🎸- He can't sleep knowing he didn't say "I love you" or he would just go to your house to lay with you

🎸- everytime he sees you he buries you with questions just to hear you constantly talk.

-Angst??-(I'm not good with this category)

[Now playing] Step on Me-the Cardigans

🎸- If u guys get into a heated argument you won't here from him for DAYS until he comes back realizing he made a mistake

🎸- I feel like his school mates would be assholes and he'd roll with it sometimes but try to apologize to you in private

🎸- (Might be an angst fic) You once caught him cheating and he didn't even feel sorry he just let you leave

🎸- (might also be angst fic maybe from the college AU) You were walking to your school/college when you were shot by some random man and you started to choke on your blood but made it to the gym floor and passed it. Hobie was HYSTERICAL

-Smut??- (I SUCK IN THIS CATEGORY)

[Now playing ] Blue hair -TV GIRL (any song that comes on my Spotify playlist I'm just putting it here)

🎸- He would constantly praise you and says things like " your doing so good" or "good girl"

🎸He will MAKE you look him in the eyes the entire time

🎸-He would try so HARD to not make noises but always fails(you just the goat)

🎸-He would grab you by the neck 100%

🎸- he would say weird stuff like "you taste so good luv"

Here's a small hobie x black reader fic where the reader is A smoke/drug addict(bear wit me)

[Now playing] Cigarettes out the window- TV GIRL

Y/N POV:

I was waiting in the office waiting for my boyfriend hobie to pick me up from rehab.

I was in rehab for five months but was still in need for more Drugs.

Hobie tried his best to make me stop but nothing would work so he'd just give in

"Hey baby" I say smiling as he came through the doors. He ran up to me and hugged me. (Time skip cause I'm tired).

We were in his house on his couch. I was BORED and hobie wasn't helping,but I wasn't bored I just needed some coke and I'll be fine...

Right?

I took some coke out of my pocket,snorting it and looking at hobie with red eyes. "Luv! I thought rehab helped you!! You said you'd quit!?". "I'm sor-....." I fell asleep in the middle of everything.

My dream was weird I was in a pool full of bags of weeds,drugs,pills anything TBH. You were excited till a voice said "snap out of it, your losing him" and that's what gave me motivation to stop

-Few months later-

Me and hobie watched the sunset holding hands. "I haven't felt this good in forever, thank you baby for helping me give up my addiction" I say getting on his lap and holding his hands. He pulled in and time went in slow motion.. that sweet passionate kiss was all I needed sll along.

Hey pookies!!!

I'm going to sleep now

Ty for the likes on my recent post I'll post the College AU part 2 tommorow bye luvies!!

Made by - @milesmoralesloverr

[jynjackets]

for the ask game your fav ship ever: bix/cassian 😍

omg my otp <3

dedicated to all four of the shippers aka my biggest fans mwah 😙

before i catch strays, here’s some optional background information under the cut

tbh, I would not give a single shit about this ship if:

-their dynamic and her character wasn’t written to be extremely sexist. it’s literally so fucking sad if i have to explain that fridging a woman who had zero significance outside of ‘caring about cassian’ is sexist. like. this character is unique in that she was purely, entirely made in bad faith. have you even questioned why she is the only latina? along with the fact that his biological sister was implied to be a prostitute?

- the ‘fans’ weren’t using it as a hateship by saying a background extra was meant for cassian just to hate on jyn before the show even fucking aired. i might believe there’s like 2 genuine people out there but that’s because they genuinely like to know the history before rebelcaptain. that said…

- the binian shippers who also ship rebelcaptain weren’t pretending they’re not insane misogynists for obsessing over a fictional man’s fictional sexual history, as if it is ONLY Cassian’s relationship with them that establishes these women’s importance; as if women literally don’t create their own importance lmao. and even if that extremely fucked-up logic had any truth, even then bin STILL loses

And also like, you idiot fans, please show me where the bin hate is. like WHERE?? because i would be liking and reblogging that shit. where is the hate that ISNT grounded in defending latinos and better writing for female characters? and don’t fucking show me a post from fucking 2022 because the fans made entirely of orientalist men-obsessed bitches are acting like they’re a persecuted minority

- the ‘fans’ weren’t fucking latinophobes and literally harassing me in my anons for being a latina speaking out against their favorite anti-black show. and whose biggest shipper wasn’t a racistass homophobicass first-world white woman in her 60s like 💀 i’m side-eyeing the fuck out of any of you who are even nice about this. you want to /not/ be called a misogynist sooo bad you’ll pretend one of the worst characters ever actually means something to you. let alone to latinas. and is that not weird?? that almost every latina in this fandom doesn’t like or just doesn’t care about this bitch? like who are you trying to fool?

- if the miss morbius actress wasn’t one of the worst people alive. i am so serious.

aside from her father being a piece of shit and one of the richest men men in latin america (meaning she’s a nepo baby, and if she has ever called herself poor she is literally lying), she’s dumb as bricks bruh. not a single brain cell behind anything she says. this is my post about her sexism with some dumb shit she’s said over the years. once in a while is understandable i guess but it’s every fucking time

she’s also a zionist

so yeah. otherwise I genuinely wouldn’t give a shit. i wish we had someone like q’ira which would make it super interesting how cassian ran into criminals before. THAT would say something about cassian and his moral departures in relationships and what that meant meeting jyn who was a rebel ‘on the wrong side’ versus q’ira who also had limited choices but different priorities in needing to rebel. she moreso ‘followed orders’ with maul which would make him understand and be familiar with someone like her. being with someone too similar to him AND contrasting in his morals would be an interesting development to see them need to break it off in order for them to grow.

but alas we have this shit. it’s pretty fucking hard to be a shipper and not fall into one of these categories of shitty fans i talked about. the least worst imo being having piss poor media literacy. so maybe you’re just a dumb don’t-know-better sexist instead of an intentionally malicious sexist. same shit to me tho.

[elisedonut]

Copying and pasting from discord because I want too

I feel like it's something i'd enjoy reading later and instead of letting it hide in my drafts I thought it would be neat to post

Someone wanted to know where alot of my weirdo Percy ships even came from because their well weird lol and instead of just like answering simply or realizing that

"hey maybe that was rhetorical and they don't actually like want that answer"

my brain went c: and I proceeded to type until i ran out of message space on discord dkjfhdsjk

Anyway Perciver is Perciver so i didn't actually go in to that one but for completion sake (Lived together for years, opposites attract, has a decent chunk of amazing fics to read, only two Gryffindor of their year that we know)

Alot of them fall into the pair your favs mentality (like Colin and back when i shipped Luna/Percy)

sometimes it's noticing something that you think a character is lacking in their life that a romantic relationship with this other person could bring (Flintley for example was mostly based around feeling like Percy would be happiest with someone 112% on his side vs his family's when i first got really interested in it)

sometimes it's just like what would cause the biggest like fuss in their life if this happened Like who could Percy be soulmates with that would piss off his family to ridiculous degree (both Draco and Remus fall into this category for me even though with both their are still like other points to them too)

Sometimes it's just like parallels with characters. Characters who already act similarly to him or in some cases are even compared to him ( Regulus for example is canonically compared to Percy in the series

it even has one of those really old ship names back when the hp fandom used s.s. ship names being literally just Black&White. I would argue a lot of my interest in the concept of Fleur/Percy falls into this section too. And then ofc Ernie Macmillan is another one because i saw his description on the wiki and went !!! Person to ship Percy with because he sounded similar but not the same to him)

Sometimes it's legit more about the scenario then it is the ship

(i feel Dennis and Dudley fall into this one for both It's a very specific situation that i like them in for Dennis a post war exploration of grief and love and finding happiness with someone who really truly understands what you are going through With Dudley a Post War, two single fathers who live in the same building situation Where Dudley is constantly running to Percy for help because he ended up with a magic child and doesn't know what he's doing. that again also explores family and breaking of generational trauma)

Sometimes you just get attached because it was legit the first pairing you literally ever wrote so now you are just stuck with these boys (Stercy)

[dibidibifiction]

Reasons to Live

Pairing: Kim Jonghyun x Reader

Category: romance

TRIGGER WARNING: depression, self-harm, death, foul language

Word count: 3.5k+

Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction made for personal entertainment of readers. The writer does not ever intend to offend her readers nor does she aim to spread false information about anyone as to pay any disrespect to the real-life persons whom the characters are based on. She also does not claim ownership to any of the images that are being used.  

masterlist

...

TWO YEARS EARLIER

JONGHYUN

I hear the curtain metal rings slide harshly two opposite ways, shocking me awake. 

“Oh, good. You were sleeping with your mouth open.”

“Great. Thanks, Mom,” I say sarcastically, rubbing my eyes.

“It’s already ten past five. I’m going home. Are you going to be okay?” my mom asks. She has taken care of me since day one I’ve been in this hospital. But now, since I’ve improved a lot, I insisted that she doesn’t have to visit every day. 

“Yes, ma’am,” I roll my eyes jokingly.

“Aww, Jonghyun, you should find a woman who will take care of you from now on instead of bothering me,” she joins my kidding around.

After she pinches my cheeks and kisses me, she heads out the door. I sit up to reach for my phone on the side table. I got messages from the boys on our group chat.

14:36

Kim Kibum: Hey, Kim Jonghyun! When are you getting discharged? You’re delaying our project. Get your shit together, yeah? Love you

15:18

Jinki: They ran some tests on you a few days ago, right? How did they go?

15:24

Minho: Hope everything’s okay, Hyung. We’re just here waiting for you~

16:20

Taemin: Hyung, did you receive my fruit basket? Hope you like it.

Reading their messages instantly puts a smile on my face. I start typing to reply that everything’s good and that I’m getting out of here soon. Maybe next week at the very least. 

I’ve been in this hospital for almost a month because of the car accident on my drive to my parents’ house after work. It was already dark and I was on the expressway when it started to rain so heavily that visibility was close to zero. Unexpectedly, a huge truck was running too fast in my direction. I managed to avoid it but then made me hit an electric post. Even though I was in a coma for three days, still, lucky for me, I had very little damage compared to others who have gotten into accidents like this.

I’ve never felt more alive. It may be hard to believe or even admit, but it might be a miracle, what happened to me. I was in such unbearable pain that I could already imagine my loved ones crying at my funeral.

I grab my little notebook and head up to the rooftop. I sit in my usual spot, which is at the very corner of the floor, overlooking the city. The city lights are like stars, the cars like elves, and the people like ants. It’s like a whole new weird world. I pull up my pen inserted at the last page I wrote on. Every time I have an idea for a song or a poem, I always write it here. 

As I’m turning the pages to look back on what I’ve written, I catch a glimpse of someone’s legs way across this wide rooftop. It looks like a person lying on the floor. 

“Hello?” I call out. 

No response. 

“Excuse me, are you okay?” My voice is a little louder, hoping to be heard.

Still nothing. Not even a subtle movement.

I drop everything and walk briskly over to check on them. 

I gasp at a young girl in a hospital gown like mine, which means she must be a patient too. I draw closer to see that she’s unconscious. And pale.

My heart twists, I hurriedly kneel down to her side and lightly put my head on her chest to check her heartbeat. 

Shit, I hear nothing. A quick shiver sends through me. 

Her pulse. I quickly grab her hand to feel her wrist and hope to feel something. 

Thank God. I exhale after what feels like twenty minutes. “Stay here. I’ll go get help.” 

I run down four flights of stairs and realize how ridiculous that sounded since she couldn’t even hear me. I finally reach the nearest nurse’s station, catching my breath in order to get words out. 

“Excuse me! There’s a girl up on the roof. She’s unconscious. Please help!” 

A nurse nods once and quickly picks up the telephone. She recites something I didn’t quite understand. Two guys with a stretcher appear immediately and ask me to let lead the way.

. . .

It’s now hours later and I can’t stop thinking about her. My last sight of her keeps flashing before my eyes. She was pale and almost lifeless. She looks pretty with her dark neck-length hair, her thin bangs fly off her forehead because of the wind. I wonder what’s wrong with her. I hope she’s okay now. Turns out she is the one who stays in the room next to mine.

My door slowly opens for a nurse to take the tray of my already finished dinner. “Hey, um, do you know what happened to the girl next door?”

“Do you know her?” he asks me right back, his eyes dead.

“Actually, yeah, I went to college with her.” I lie.

“Oh, okay, then,” he sighs. “Well, she attempted to kill herself again.”

My jaws drop in shock. “What?” I stutter. My heart sinks even more at the word ‘again.’

“It’s the third time she’s done that during her stay here. I really hope she'll stop. I’m worried about her. She doesn’t even have a family for us to call for a situation like this. There’s only this one guy that comes over every now and then.” His eyes suddenly change and fill up with pity when he walks out the door.

---

PRESENT DAY

Y/N

I run to the bus stop to see Jonghyun already waiting for me by his car in hazard mode at the side of the road. Two weeks passed and this is the most I’ve seen him since he’s been busy with his comeback. 

He spots me, then waves so happily that he’s almost jumping.

I land in his arms. “Jonghyun, I missed you,” I weep on his chest. 

He pulls away to look at my face, cupping my cheeks. “How’s my girl?” his eyes twinkle. He lovingly leans in for a five-second kiss.

“I’m sorry I kept you waiting,” I pout.

“No, I just got here,” he smiles. “Shall we?”

We both hop in his car and drive to Taemin’s house to have dinner with the boys. It was supposed to be a celebration for their comeback promotion weeks ago but it always fell through. Now that their promotion ended, they decided to have the gathering tonight. It was Minho and Kibum’s idea. Taemin offered his place to hold it. 

They love a good party. Kibum wanted to invite as many people as they could but Minho wanted an intimate gathering with just close friends. The decision was made democratically but it was tied up. So all that long heated, turbulent discussion led us to the lowkey one with just close friends.

Jonghyun and I arrive with three handsome boys already in sight. Minho greets me with a warm hug and then leads me toward the kitchen where Jinki and Kibum are preparing food.

“Mmm, smells good over here. Where’s Taemin?” I ask no one in particular while I make my way to sit on a spinning stool by the island.

“He’s not here yet,” Kibum answers me while he holds a wooden spoon in front of me to let me taste his soondubu stew. 

“What? He’s late even at his own party being held at his house. Great.” I say as I nod approvingly to Kibum, telling him that it’s delicious.

Jinki giggles. “That’s our youngest.”

I laugh, wiping off droplets of soup on my chin.

“Speak of the devil,” Kibum mutters as soon as I hear the front door beep. 

I welcome Taemin with a giggle and my arms open for a hug. “Hey, what are you doing late at your own party?” I say, pulling away from his one-hand embrace.

“I came as fast as I could. You’re at my house. Stop complaining!” he laughs too.

. . .

It is now four hours later. Jonghyun and I are back in his car on our way to his apartment. I insisted he takes me home but he insisted harder for me to stay at his place since it’s closer.

“Plus, I missed you and I want to be with you a little longer,” he says, kissing my hand while his eyes are on the road. 

“Really? Well...” I say, having something in mind. I start drawing closer to him and slide my palm on his lap up to his crotch. I lean in closer, humming into his ear.

He swallows. “Hey, I’m driving.”

I laugh at him. “Fine, I’ll wait until we get home.”

“Home?” He looks at me for a second, smiling. Then back on the road.

I pause, thinking of what I said. “What?” 

“Did you just propose for us to live together?”

“Where’d that come from? You’re making stuff up again.” I playfully punch his arm.

He laughs out loud. It is so beautiful that it is the most musical sound I’ve ever heard.

After a few seconds of silence, he grabs my hand. I turn to him, waiting for him to say something. “So, do you want to move in?”

My mouth opens in quite a confusion but immediately curves into a huge smile. “Yeah, of course! I’d love that,” I screech. I lean into him for a kiss on his cheek, then rest my head on his shoulder while he pulls over into parking.

He turns to me, cupping my cheek. “I love you so much, Y/n.” 

It makes me melt every time he says those words to me. My eyes fill in with tears. “I love you, too.”

---

TWO YEARS EARLIER

An overflowing burning sensation boils in my stomach, making me abruptly sit up and throw up on myself. I feel like my internal organs are about to come out of my mouth. I feel so heavy that I can't open my eyes. When I do, it’s brief and cloudy.

I suddenly hear the door open. Somebody walks into my room. A nurse perhaps. After I feel them carefully laid me back down, I catch a blurry figure of a man standing in my direction by the door outside my room. Before I can control my own consciousness, everything goes black again.

. . .

I slowly open my eyes with the sun blaring at me. It irritates the shit out of me. I get out of bed in an attempt to close my blinds but somebody stops me.

“Whoa, wait, be careful.” A guy in a hospital gown like mine suddenly appears before me. 

“What the fuck are you doing here?” I glare at him.

He looks startled by my sudden rage. Despite this, he adjusts the wire connecting the needle inserted in my arm and the IV that’s hung next to my bed before I could mess it up. 

“Let me get that for you,” he mutters before closing the blinds for me, leaving a bit of sunlight.

My face relaxes from frowning as I watch him walk back toward me. He sits on the chair next to my bed. I notice his attractive appearance. Dark hair that covers his entire forehead, a cute smile and a muscular body. I somehow get lost in his stare with those innocent and sparkly eyes, making the anger inside me fade. I feel some kind of warm relief. 

“Uh, I’m Jonghyun. Sorry to disturb you. I just wanted to see how you’re doing. I have not heard about you since I found you on the roof a few days ago.”

I snap out, bringing back my scowl. “Why?”

He stutters. “Well-”

“We don’t even know each other.”

“No, but-”

“Do you like me? Is that why you saved me?” I’m getting more pissed with this stranger in my room. “Or are you just trying to be some kind of a hero that saves my life, then our story would turn into a cheesy romantic cliché?

Silence. He just stares at me. Probably awkward and shocked.

“Get out of here before I call security.”

Without saying anything else, he gets up from his seat and walks to the door. Looking flustered, he glances back at me before sliding it close behind him. 

. . .

The moon has come out. It’s the only time of day that I appreciate the outside. I stand before the window, looking out, watching the cars and cabs go about down there. Thinking that there are millions of people existing, I question why the fuck I’m alone. 

Literally. 

Emotionally. 

I fall on my butt, and for the first time in almost a year, I cry out loud. Extremely loud. Numbingly loud. “What the fuck is wrong with you?” I pull my hair out, punch my head, slap my own face. Dig my nails into my neck, scratch down to my chest, and then my arms. I kick my legs hysterically. Repeatedly.

I hate being alive. 

Eventually, my hearing went faint, abandoning its purpose. I feel someone grab me from behind, restraining me tightly. 

“Let me go! Just please let me go. Please! I don’t want to be alive anymore.” I continue to scream furiously, trying to escape everything that tries to come at me.

But then, I see that it’s Minho who’s hugging me. I crash into his arms, shut the fuck up, and cry silently. 

“Y/n, I’m here. It’s okay. It’s going to be okay. I’m here for you. Please, stop now,” he hushes me. I can finally hear his voice. He's the only one I can trust. His embrace is the only comforting thing to me.

I’m breathing heavily, trying to calm down. I watch a nurse approach with a syringe but Minho immediately shoves it away. 

We just stayed like this. I have not idea how long but I don’t want it to end.

After some time, the noises in my head settle down. I can see clearly again. 

---

PRESENT DAY

JONGHYUN

After my radio show, I come home to a beautiful lady waiting for me on the couch in the dressing gown I got her for Christmas last year, and a pair of thick-framed reading glasses with a book in hand. 

I join her, laying my head between her breasts. “Hi, roomie.” I look up at her, then give her a wink. We talked about moving in together weeks ago and the day I’d been waiting for has finally come. She’s finally settled in with me. There couldn’t be any other day happier than this.

She hisses. “Shut up,” then goes back to reading her book, blocking my view of her pretty little face. 

I hiss back. I then crawl out off the couch to pick her up bridal style, spinning her around.

Y/n shrieks, laughing. “Jonghyun, stop!” 

So I do. “Oh, hey, we haven’t done that thing couples do once they move in.”

“I thought you were going to be too tired from work,” she says, her arms around my neck.

Her thinking about sex is heaven to me! But that’s not what I’m talking about. “No, stupid,” I chuckle at her while I put her down on her feet. “Come here.” I grab her hand for her to follow me out the front door. 

“Wait, what? Where are we going? I’m not dressed,” she complains.

I close the door once we get out. Y/n is still confused about what we’re doing. I pick her up again, bridal style. “Now, enter the code.”

She doesn’t say anything else and does as I say.

Once she opens the door, “Welcome home!” I cheer.

She laughs out loud. “Oh, so now we’re officially living together. Amazing!” she says playfully.

But I don’t put her down just yet and head to the bedroom.

“What are you doing?”

“We’re doing that other thing that couples do when they move in together.” 

“Yay!” she cheers, then kisses me deeply on the spot as I bring the action to our bedroom. 

---

TWO YEARS EARLIER

There’s a knock on the door while I watch a movie on the flatscreen. I hit pause on the remote control.

“Hyung!” Minho calls out enthusiastically as he enters my room with bags of food in his hand.

“Hey! What are you doing here?”

“What? Can’t a guy visit his guy friend who is unlucky enough to get into an accident?” he jokes around, handing me my lunch.

“Thank you very much,” I bow to him. 

Minho and I do some catching up, talking about his new drama series, and some other work stuff until our conversation finds itself about the girl staying next door.

“Then she just kicked me out of her room and threatened to call security on me. This is what she did to a person who saved her life?” I pout.

“Oh, my God. You’re the stalker she’s been talking about?”

“Stalker? Woah, that woman. After what I did for her?” My blood is boiling with intense irritation. But it subsides quickly once I realize something. “Wait, you know her?”

“Yeah, I actually spent the night in her room.”

I pause, staring at Minho in confusion. “You’re not… Nothing’s going on with you two, is there?

“Oh, no. Nothing like that. I’ve known her since childhood. Our parents used to be close. That was when her mother was still alive and her dad hadn’t moved to Japan.”

“Wow, she has it tough, huh?” Just like that, irritation turns compassion. 

“Yeah, but there’s more to that. Something that no one can explain, not even her herself.”

She’s been suicidal. Her depression has taken a lot from her. Hearing this makes me want to look after her more.

---

PRESENT DAY

Y/N

Since then, Jonghyun had been visiting me every evening to have dinner together even when I kept pushing him away, asking him to stop trying to save me.

Days after he got discharged, he came back, but I wasn’t in my room anymore. When he found out that I was transferred to the psychiatric ward, he came running to my door.

“Why didn’t you tell me you were being transferred?”

“Why would I?” I frowned.

“Right,” he laughed awkwardly. 

His phone vibrated in his pocket. 

“Hey, what are you-” 

He trailed off, his face turning red as he listened. It’s definitely Minho.

I suddenly snatched the phone from Jonghyun’s hand and walk near the door out of earshot. “Hey, where the hell are you?” I scolded Minho in a whisper. “You are not letting him-”

“It’s okay, Y/n. He means well. Maybe it’s time for you to let somebody else in for a change,” he laughed statically. “Love you.” 

I sighed in irritation as I heard the dial tone. “Here.” I hand Jonghyun’s phone back to him while he just smiled at me goofily.

If it wasn’t for Minho, I never would’ve trusted anyone again. And because of Jonghyun, trusting and loving again was worth it. 

By the time I got discharged from the ward, Jonghyun and I eventually started dating officially. He was always there for me. Offered to come with me to my therapist twice a week but I insisted that I could go by myself. I would meet the rest of the boys not long after we got together. Since then, I’ve got the best friends ever.

Sooner or later, I would get back to work in teaching kindergarten. I can’t imagine my career going any other way. I thank myself for being alive today. Some days, I’d join Jonghyun and the boys in organizing a charity mission. I’d teach kids in far provinces. I forgot how fulfilling working with children was when I was too busy being miserable.

I’ve never felt so alive. Not to mention grateful. 

“I’m so proud of you, honey,” my dad tells me with a big smile on his face.

“Thanks, Dad,” I smile back at my computer screen. “By the way, when are you coming? You should tell me ahead of time so I can prepare you something.”

Before I can hear his response, the front door of my apartment beeped. “Oh, I have to go. Jonghyun’s here.”

“I should really meet this Jonghyun. You’re talking about him a lot,” he says.

I shake my head and laugh at him before hanging up.

“Was that your dad?” Jonghyun asks as soon as he approaches and kisses me on the lips.

“Yeah.”

“Is he coming to visit?”

“He didn’t say,” I tell him, shutting down my laptop.

I stare at Jonghyun while he removes his shoes and walks towards me.

“What?” he asks, then kisses me on the forehead.

Trying not to tear up, I just shake my head and giggle at him. If it wasn’t for Jonghyun, my life would be so much different right now. Hell, I’d be dead. Because of him, I regained my bond with my dad. 

Months ago, they had to go to Japan for work and he made me come with them so my father and I could finally talk. We had never seen eye to eye ever since Mom died. We had drifted apart. Now, we are closer than ever.

I’m not saying my depression is gone and my attacks are non-existent anymore. They still come every now and then, although not as bad as before. Jonghyun has always been so caring and understanding. I could cry just thinking about it. I got to be with the best person and have the best friends in the world. 

[auxiliarydetective]

Drunken Sailors - Miela/Red Hair Pirates

So... This may be the filthiest thing I've ever written. And it's also the way I introduce my newest One Piece OC to you! Fantastic, right?

Huge thanks to the members of the Discord server for enabling me <3 @skullfacedlady @indydonuts @armiliadawn @queenmimi2817 and the rest of the gang, this is for you <3

And now, I shall let the AO3 tags speak...

Rating: Explicit Archive Warning: No Archive Warnings Apply Category: Multi Relationships: Red-Hair Pirates/Original Female Character(s), Red-Haired Shanks/Original Female Character(s), Benn Beckman/Original Female Character(s), Yasopp/Original Female Character(s), Lucky Roux/Original Female Character(s), Limejuice/Original Female Character(s), Building Snake/Original Female Character(s), Hongo/Original Female Character(s) Additional Tags (aka warnings): Other relationships mentioned, Prostitution, Alcohol, Catcalling, Exhibitionism, Voyeurism, Original Devil Fruit, Inappropriate Use of Devil Fruit Powers, Aphrodisiacs, Drink Spiking (more spiking than drink, actually), Dom/sub, Daddy Kink, Tentacle Sex, Dirty Talk, Lactation (in like one sentence), Free Use, Pet play mentioned, Anal Sex, Hand & Finger Kink, Dubious Morality, Consentacles

You can find the fic on AO3 here

With that being said... Let's get into it <3

(I am ready to be shamed)

Miela adjusted the bandana holding back her hair, giving herself a quick check in the mirror, retouching her lipstick. Then, she pulled the straps of her bodice back up, took a deep breath and headed back out.

As soon as she stepped back into the main room of the bar, she could tell that it had gotten louder. Really, a group of maybe half a dozen men, most likely a pirate crew, was settling down around a set of tables, already checking out the buffet of pretty waitresses in the room. Just like that, the bar had gone from halfway empty to busy.

But that was alright, because pirate crews always meant easy money – that was if they paid. And these guys looked like somewhere between morally upstanding and dirt-poor, a weird sort of mix between the members. Still, nothing that Miela couldn’t handle.

While her fellow waitresses might have been pretty, it was clear that Miela was the prettiest, the perkiest, the hottest, she told herself, even if business hadn’t been going great lately. Truth be told, she was famished. But if Madam Rosie would…

“Desirée. You’re fifteen minutes late. Take care of tables six and eight.”

Yes! Now things would get better. With these instructions transmitted over her earpiece, Miela picked up a few menus and headed towards her goal.

Meanwhile, across the room, Shanks ran a hand through his hair, leaning back in his seat. It had been a few weeks since leaving Windmill Village, and he still hadn’t gotten over it. His crewmates must have realized too. The way he kept tugging at the coat obscuring his missing arm wasn’t exactly subtle and they hadn’t been partying as much as they had used to. It was almost embarrassing how they’d had to nearly drag him into this bar, his trusted officers, and how they’d had to convince him at that.

But now, all the eye candy in the room was making him feel at least a little better. Maybe even a good portion. There was something for everyone here and he could tell Beckman was already searching for his first catch of the night.

Almost all of the waitresses were young, lots tall and slender, some a little more well-endowed, but none of them truly eye-catching. They were beautiful, sure, but with the amount of women the Red Hair Pirates had seen…

That was until Shanks heard a low whistle, followed by chattering from the crew. He turned around in his seat and a smile spread across his face.

One of the waitresses was aiming right for their table, her hips swaying as she walked and the menus she kept clutched to her chest doing very little to hide her generous cleavage. Noticeably shorter than her colleagues, she made up for it in confidence, and her wavy, golden hair and pink eyes weren’t exactly downsides either. Looking at Yasopp and Lucky Roux, if Beckman didn’t take the girl home tonight, one of them would clearly try. That was if Shanks didn’t one-up them first.

“Good evening,” the woman greeted them, a wide smile on her lips. “Here are your menus.”

Instead of handing them to the men straight away, she bent over and put them in the middle of the tables instead, graciously showing off her tits. The entire group was grinning wildly, throwing little whistles and comments, and Shanks found himself pulled along as well, his thoughts wandering from what had happened a week ago. No time like the present after all.

“Or can I already get you something?”

“Yeah, you,” Yasopp said, gaining him a smack from Limejuice.

“We don’t do that here,” the waitress responded in a sweet tone.

But she looked at Yasopp as she spoke, giving him a cheeky wink. Then, she let her eyes fall for a moment, directing his gaze at the menu. Shanks smirked, exchanging a telling gaze with Snake.

What a liar.

Lightly, Shanks tapped the waitress on the thigh, gaining her attention.

“Two bottles of rum, please, and seven glasses.”

“Don’t be stingy, Captain,” Hongo chuckled.

“You gotta start off slow, right? You should know that, Doc.”

“Two bottles of rum, seven glasses,” the waitress echoed, scribbling their order on a little notepad. “Right away, Captain,” she purred, brushing past his arm as she left.

Immediately, the group broke out into laughter and bickered over who got the menus in the middle of the patchworked table.

“Chaser missed his shot,” Limejuice teased, reeling in one of the leather-bound booklets.

“Don’t get used to it,” Yasopp threw back, “‘cause it’ll never happen again.”

Ignoring their antics, Beckman leaned over to Shanks. “What do you think she’s got under that skirt?” he muttered.

“Clothes-wise?” Shanks chuckled, snatching up a menu. “I’d say very little. But I’ll be damned if she doesn’t have a nice ass.”

“Shame that Gab and Punch stayed behind with Monster,” Roux commented, too busy invading Yasopp’s personal space to read along. “They would’ve loved her.”

“Oh, they will,” Snake predicted. “Look at the Captain. We’re gonna come back again.”

Shanks shook his head in feigned offense. “Only if they have good liquor. Besides, Snake… Didn’t you say sex work was illegal on this island?”

“It is,” Snake confirmed, “but that doesn’t mean that it’s not happening.”

“Aha,” Yasopp grinned, “so these special services are really what I think they are, huh?”

Shank’s eyes wandered to the back of the menu, after all the drinks, where a list of special services was noted on a little card - one that he promptly snatched out of the brochure to keep.

“Well, if a nightcap costs over 10,000 Berry…” Hongo murmured.

Shanks studied the card, the writing so small that it was almost difficult to read.

Madam Rosie’s Specials: Dressrosa Roja - 2,500 Berry Round of Blackjack - 4,000 Berry Round of Pool - 6,000 Berry Nightcap, light - 10,000 Berry Nightcap, strong - 14,000 Berry City Guide - 20,000+ Berry* * to be negotiated with the Madam, prices vary

“Now if only we knew what all of this means,” Limejuice grumbled.

“We could just order whatever and see where it takes us,” Yasopp joked.

“Not us, these are solo deals,” Shanks said. “But if you behave, I might be willing to share.”

“So, the little lady caught your eye?” Beckman asked.

“If she plays nice.”

“I’m sure she does,” Yasopp declared, eyes pinned beyond the group.

“Does what?” the waitress’s voice came from behind Shanks as she slid past him, placing a tray with two bottles and seven glasses on the table. “I do a lot of things, so you’ll have to be more specific.”

“I think,” Shanks started, snaking his arm around her legs and squeezing her thigh, “that you’ve got an idea what all of these specials mean and that you’ll kindly explain – in detail.”

“Well, you wouldn’t be wrong,” she hummed, removing his hand from her thigh and turning to face him. Graciously, she bent over until her chest was at his eye level and he made no efforts at looking away. “But if you want me to stay,” she said, lifting his chin, “you’ll have to pay for a round of Blackjack. We’re very busy today and the Madam is very strict with her bookkeeping.”

Shanks glanced over at Beckman, only to see him already holding a stack of cash, a 5,000 Berry note up top.

And that’s why you’re my first mate.

“Then tell your Madam,” Shanks muttered, “that we want as many rounds as this money can buy.”

The waitress raised her hand to take the cash but before she could, Shanks slid it between her tits, never once breaking eye contact. He was rewarded by the delicious sight of her face turning a hot pink, blushing wildly.

“As you please,” she whispered, her voice seeming to fail her for a moment.

Then, she backed away, her steps a little faster as she beelined straight for the staff room behind the bar.

“So, does she play nice?” Lucky Roux asked, a wide grin on his face.

Shanks didn’t reply but his expression said it all, the way he smirked and followed the girl’s every move… He wasn’t the only one either. Every single person at their table couldn’t help but stare at her in the long run, whether that be subtly or very obviously. Mostly, it was the latter.

“Wanna bet on her devil fruit?” Hongo asked, nudging Limejuice with an elbow.

“Devil fruit?” Yasopp and Lucky Roux echoed.

“Thought you had good vision,” Limejuice teased. “Her mouth and tongue were golden just a minute ago.”

“And they turned pink when the Captain paid her,” Hongo added, placing a couple of Berry on the table. “I say it’s emotion-based.”

“Paint-Paint Fruit,” Yasopp declared, wagering a slightly larger sum.

“Paint in your mouth?” Lucky Roux scoffed. “Sounds disgusting. I say it’s the Rainbow Fruit or something.”

“And now for the winning pick,” Snake mumbled, eyeing Limejuice as he took it upon himself to pour the drinks.

“No, no,” Limejuice quickly stammered. “I’ve gotten fruits wrong before.”

“You’re usually right though.”

“Well, if you’re so sure, why don’t you join in?” Yasopp teased, gesturing to the pile of Berry in the middle.

“You’re not getting half my winnings,” Limejuice stated, just before Snake could start betting.

“C’mon, don’t be so stingy.”

“You won the last five bets,” Lucky Roux reminded him, who himself hadn’t been as lucky in these little gambling games.

“And then lost a simple drinking contest,” Hongo muttered with a smirk.

“You spiked my drink!” Limejuice complained.

While those five were still bickering, Shanks’s eyes were trained on the bar, or rather on the staff room door behind it. The pretty waitress was standing in the doorway, talking to someone inside – most likely Madam Rosie. She was backing away now and the door opened fully. Out stepped a large and muscular woman, her name nothing like her appearance. She commanded respect, the way she looked so graceful in her well-tailored, corseted dress, but also seemed perfectly capable of smashing an unruly customer’s skull within a second.

“Doesn’t she kinda remind you of Big Mom in her younger days?” Shanks muttered, glancing over at Beckman.

“If you put her in polka dots and a tricorn.”

“A pink wig?”

“Mhm.”

Madam Rosie was looking straight at Shanks and Beckman now, then inspected the rest of the officers. But that was less important than how the waitress looked at them, with her cheeks still visibly flushed even from a distance and an excited sparkle in her eyes.

The drinks were poured now but Shanks could hardly be bothered to pay attention to them. He made a quick toast with the crew, then turned back towards the bar, just in time to see Madam Rosie whispering something in the waitress’s ear. Her excitement seemed to have dimmed a little, but that wasn’t a problem. The Red Hair Pirates were always good company, they’d have her back in no time.

Finally, the waitress came back towards them, a purse and a rectangular pouch dangling from her waist - presumably for blackjack. But that wasn’t all there was to it and they all knew it.

She sauntered towards Shanks, ready to say something, but before she could, he had his arm wrapped around her and pulled her in. As if reading his mind, she stepped past him and let herself be pulled into his lap, giggling lightly as he squeezed her ass. She draped one of her arms over his shoulder, causing the bangles around her wrists to jingle. A light spark of surprise travelled through her eyes – one lighter than the other, both a pretty pink – as if she had noticed his lack of a left arm. But if she really had, she didn’t let it on, gently tracing her fingers across the sliver of skin revealed by his open collar.

“Now that I’ve got your attention,” Shanks mumbled in a suggestive tone, “might I have your name?”

“Business or private?” the waitress echoed, gaining her many whistles and comments.

“Does there have to be a difference?”

The waitress let out something between a sigh and a chuckle, directing her eyes around the room.

“Anyone who starts working here and takes to engaging in certain services is bound to get a new name,” she explained. “It’s how we recognize each other. Like a secret language or code. I’m sure there’s something similar in the world of pirates, right?”

Various “eh”’s and shrugs travelled around the table, the waitress clearly more interesting than thinking.

“If you count the Jolly Rogers,” Yasopp commented.

“We have our epithets,” Hongo recalled. “But we don’t pick them ourselves, the Marines pick them for us.”

“Well, I didn’t pick my professional name either,” the waitress hummed. She turned her attention fully towards Shanks again, carding her fingers through his salty hair. “I guess I don’t need to ask how you got yours… Red-Haired Shanks.”

“So your Madam told you about us,” Beckman guessed.

“Not a lot. But she does give us a heads up whenever certain special guests are involved.” The waitress shifted in her position, making sure to move across Shanks’s lap in just such a way that she knew he'd  like. She turned towards the rest of the crew, tucking her head beneath Shanks’s chin. “Though I’m still a little shaky on the who’s who. I don’t get a lot of time to read the news.”

Thus started a little round of introductions, which soon turned into each of the crewmates trying to one-up each other, sharing the stories behind their epithets and their greatest feats…

----------

A lot of time went by though none of them noticed, its passage only measurable by the rum in the bottles getting fewer and fewer. All the while, Shanks was sitting pretty with the waitress in his arms, casually exploring the softness of her thighs or the curve of her waist. Being the captain, he had little to prove. That was until he heard a little static noise near his chest and the waitress stirred.

“Time’s up, gentlemen,” she quipped, running a hand along Shanks’s stubbled chin as she addressed the rest of the group. “It was lovely talking to all of you.”

But just as she tried to get up, Shanks’s grip around her tightened and she stumbled back down, surprised by how much strength he had in just one arm.

“We can buy more time, right?” he just commented.

Within the blink of an eye, a stack of Berry was gathered by contributions from everyone, and Beckman was dutifully counting the bills. The money passed from one hand to another, eventually offered to the waitress with a cool yet enticing look from Beckman. The gaze she threw back was suggestive yet content, maybe bordering on cocky. He would put her in her place later, he noted to himself. But for now, he let her brush her hand against his as she took the money and handed it to one of her colleagues passing by. It was a practiced gesture, fluid and discreet, if not for the fact that the waitress stuck her tongue out to the other girl, who made a face at her in return. Using this little distraction, Shanks grabbed the waitress by the chin and turned her back towards him.

“You still haven’t told us your name,” he reminded her.

“And we’re back where we started,” she replied, “safe for a few glasses of rum, give or take. More?”

“Always.”

The waitress gave a little wave to the bar, then turned back towards the table, only to notice…

“Hey, you haven’t been drinking at all. Have I been ruining your appetite?”

“Quite the opposite,” Shanks replied, “I’ve just been busy with more important things,” he declared, pulling her snugly against him for emphasis.

“Well, this is a bar,” she commented, picking up Shanks’s glass and lifting it to the height of his chest like a bit of bait. “What fun is it being here if you won’t drink? I’ll gladly be of assistance…”

“Only if you’ll finally tell me your name.”

“Private?”

“Private.”

The waitress hummed, a dark pink blush spreading across her cheeks. “It’s Miela,” she finally revealed, holding the glass to Shanks’s lips so he could drink. “But if you want a service, you’ll ask for Desirée.”

The night continued with stories and drinks, with snacks and laughter, and yet no one had mentioned the devil fruit bet again. It wasn’t important now anyways, with how Miela ended up dividing her attention amongst the crew, sliding right along with their tales and humor, gifting them the kindest smiles and the sweetest laughter. Time went on, until there was another buzz of static and Miela went rigid in Shanks’s arms.

“If you’ll excuse me,” she said slowly, her tone having gone cold. “We’re about to get a visit from the Marines.”

“Marines?” Lucky Roux echoed. “What do they want here?”

“Believe it or not, this is an open bar, so they can come and go as they please. Even if they’re just as unwelcome as the police.”

Around them, tables started clearing as groups of presumably pirates hurried for the back door and girls in girded-up skirts and bandanas removed themselves from chairs across the room, some retreating up a spiral staircase behind the bar, others faux-naively washing glasses or cleaning the surfaces…

“You have a separate police force?” Limejuice questioned. “Isn’t that a bit overboard?”

“It’s not when you’re trying to ban anything fun,” Miela shrugged. “Now, if you’ll let me go—”

“Why do you care about what they’ll say?” Shanks asked, a mischievous grin on his lips. “Just a second ago, you were lying on the table, letting us pour liquor into your mouth, and you didn’t care one bit.”

“Because back then it didn’t mean I could lose my job,” she replied a little shakily. “Please, you can’t be that cruel.” Another sound of static interrupted her and she held her hand to her ear, gazing over to the bar – where Madam Rosie was standing and staring at her. “And I have a responsibility to the other girls,” Miela added. “As a captain, you have to understand, right?”

Shanks let out a defeated little sigh, but he finally took his hand off her, letting her climb off his lap. As she did, she had one of her hands on his shoulder, and he could hear a quiet click coming from one of the bangles around her wrists.

“But once the Marines are gone, you’ll come back, alright?”

“As long as you can pay,” she hummed, giving him a wink.

That was when the door opened and a Marine Captain came in, tall and built like a brick, with a squad of his men in pursuit.

The momentary distraction was all that Miela needed, as the Madam’s eyes were pulled from her. Quickly, she put one hand on Shanks’s shoulder, the other on his cheek, and pulled him into a kiss, pressing her plush lips onto his. It was brief, and though Shanks tried to keep her there, she slipped out of his reach before he could react, straightening out her skirt as she hurried for the entrance.

The Red Hair Pirates watched as she made her way through the room, her demeanor calm and collected. As she brushed past one of her fellow waitresses, an exchange took place, barely even visible to the naked eye. The waitress passed a shot glass to Miela – barely even a shot glass, maybe half the size of one. Neither of them stopped or even slowed down. It was a practiced maneuver, one they must’ve played through a dozen times. As she walked on, Miela held the little glass behind her back, when something odd happened. One of her fingers, the one hovering directly above the shot glass, turned a glossy hot pink, a slimy liquid dropping down from its tip into the glass.

That was as far as the men’s eyes could follow her, then she disappeared into the crowd, only to reappear a moment later in front of the Marine Captain.

Peeking through the group of waitresses and soldiers and past the commanding presence of Madam Rosie, Yasopp made a discovery that made him furrow his brows, then laugh. Something that no one else seemed to catch. 

Only a blink of an eye later, the group at the entrance dispersed, and the lower-rank soldiers were ushered to a now-empty table, led very generously by the waitresses. But Miela was nowhere among them. Instead, the Red Hair Pirates only caught a glimpse of her golden hair as she snuck up the stairs, the Marine Captain in tow.

“And there she goes,” Roux murmured sadly, reaching for the bowl of chips to cheer him up.

“I have a feeling she’ll be back,” Yasopp assured him, grinning wildly.

“What did you see?” Snake immediately asked, knowing that expression far too well.

“Our little baby isn’t playing it fair,” Yasopp quipped, leaning back in his chair and downing the rest of his glass, only to pour himself another. “And I’m feeling pretty good about my bet.”

“Alright, spit it out,” Hongo grumbled.

“Relax, Doc, alright? Once she gets back, we’ll have to ask her to work you over, damn.”

“Can’t say I’d be mad about that.”

“Alright, Chaser, what is it?” Beckman asked.

“Well, that other waitress gave her the shot glass, right?” Yasopp recalled. “And while she carried it, her finger turned into a pink liquid that she dripped into the glass.”

“Could still be the rainbow fruit,” Roux muttered, gaining him an annoyed little stare from Yasopp.

“Rainbows aren’t liquid. Anyway, she gave that little shot glass to the Marine, with only the pink stuff in it - and he drank it. And only a second later, he was sending his men away, and she could pull him with her like a little puppy.”

“What does that have to do with your bet?” Limejuice scoffed. “That doesn’t sound like paint.”

“It sounds like poison,” Shanks commented. “Or… something else.”

“Drugs?” Snake guessed.

“Well, you’re not supposed to drink paint, are you now?” Yasopp defended himself. “So, it’s basically poison. And– and poisons  small doses are basically drugs, right, Doc?”

Hongo let out an exasperated sigh. “I suppose you’re right, yeah,” he lied. Then he picked up his glass and downed it in one go.

“Good idea,” Shanks groaned, refilling his own and Hongo’s right afterwards. “While she’s gone, I say we play a drinking game. I’m far too sober for this time of night.”

----------

They played games for quite a while, taking turns at staring longingly at the stairs and getting distracted, causing them to lose their game.

Finally, Snake let out a triumphant little noise as he spotted Miela tip-toeing down into the main room again, picking and pulling at her bodice and skirt. Her hair looked slightly disheveled, though that only made her all the more attractive. She passed by Madam Rosie’s door on her way down, peeking her head in for only a moment. Then, she glanced over at the table where the rest of the Marines were gathered, by now blackout drunk, each with a waitress at their side. The Red Hair Pirates had been wondering when one of the soldiers would recognize them, but they were clearly too busy to notice them, let alone to care.

Finally, Miela returned to the Red Hair Pirates’ table, being greeted with the warmest welcome. As if it was her long-since designated seat, she let herself fall into Shanks’s lap, basking in his attention and his touch.

“What did you give to him?” Hongo asked, cutting straight to the chase.

He had a sly smirk on his face, and by the way Miela was looking at him, his gaze was piercing right through her chest, straight into her soul.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” she squeaked in feigned innocence, pouting at Hongo as she snuggled further into Shanks’s chest.

“The Marine, kitten,” Beckman said lowly, turning Miela’s face towards him. “Yasopp saw that you gave him a shot glass filled with a pink liquid and now our doctor wants to know what it was that  you gave him. You won’t let him down, right?”

The longer he had spoken, the pinker Miela’s face had become, until she was blushing furiously. “O-oh, that, I—”

“Talk to him, not me.”

Obediently, Miela turned back towards Hongo. “It was nothing, really, just an extra strong nightcap.”

“Extra strong?” Snake echoed. “That’s not even on the menu.”

“I— Well— That’s because—”

“How come he gets it for free?” Shanks pouted, letting his hand wander up and down her stomach teasingly. “Weren’t we considered something like ‘special guests’ earlier?”

“Well—”

“Do it again.”

“What?”

“The liquid came from your finger, right?” Yasopp remarked, leaning on the table. “Do that again.”

“I can’t show you, it’s confidential,” Miela blurted out, though she didn’t really look panicked. In fact, it almost looked like she was enjoying this.

“But we wanna see,” Roux insisted.

“I can’t.”

“I thought you liked us.”

“I do, I really do, but—”

“They’re seastone,” Snake concluded, prompting Beckman to pick up one of the bangles around Miela’s wrist, pulling her hand up alongside it. “You can’t show us unless your Madam unlocks those for you, right?”

“Yeah,” Miela huffed, looking around the table with puppy eyes. “I wish I could show you… And there’s so much more I could do…”

“But ten thousand Berry…” Shanks sighed exaggeratedly, acting like he hadn’t paid at least double to get to hold her like this. “Can you imagine how much a round of that would cost?”

“We don’t sell them in rounds,” Miela whispered, only to squeal quietly as she felt Shanks’s fingers dip beneath her neckline.

All the while, the Red Hair Pirates watched with grins and smirks on their faces, not caring one bit about the inappropriate direction that these negotiations were headed in. And looking at Miela, she didn’t mind either, unconsciously – or consciously? – arching her back and pushing her chest into Shanks’s hand.

“Are you sure?” he asked, placing a hint of a kiss on her cheek.

“I think… we could make an exception.”

“That’s my girl.”

Miela pressed her lips together as Shanks latched on to her neck, sucking harshly, marking his prize as she tried her hardest to keep from losing her mind.

“So, what devil fruit is it?” Yasopp asked with a dirty grin, knowing that she was in no state to answer.

“Slime Slime Fruit,” Limejuice declared smugly. “Isn’t that right, princess?”

Miela just nodded, managing only a small noise of confirmation.

“And the walking devil fruit encyclopedia strikes again,” Snake chuckled. “Payout time, Beck.”

Beckman, having been tasked with guarding the betting money, dutifully split up the winnings between Limejuice and Snake, leaving Hongo, Yasopp and not-so-Lucky Roux pouting.

“Slime, huh?” Hongo muttered. “Is it an aphrodisiac?”

“Aphrodisiac?” Shanks cooed, finally, moving away from Miela’s neck and running his finger across the dark love bite he had left. “What is it, a Paramecia?”

Limejuice nodded. “Mhm, but it works like a Logia, making the user capable of fully transforming into slime. But it also has some passive effects on the user, even when they’re kept down by sea stone.”

He reached his hand out for Miela’s face but couldn’t get to her, sitting just a little too far away. But one silent exchange of words with Shanks and one moving of glasses later, Miela was pressed down with her chest against the table, looking up at Limejuice with needy eyes. He pinched her cheeks and she dutifully opened her mouth, sticking out her tongue for him. It was a hot pink, coated in a thin layer of slime that was nearly dripping onto the table. 

The Red Hair Pirates marvelled at her like a rare animal, allowing Shanks to take his time admiring her ass and legs and running his hand along her spine. Hongo, meanwhile, took two of his fingers and placed them in her mouth, watching with an expression somewhere between studious and horny as she sucked on them.

“Is it just her saliva?” he asked, not once taking his eyes off her.

“No, it’s any bodily fluid, really,” Limejuice shrugged. “It’s just that some are stronger than others. Her saliva is the second strongest, and I can only imagine that her cum would be the best, but the encyclopedia wasn’t exactly detailed on that.”

“Wow, you really memorized that page, huh?” Yasopp teased him.

“Let’s just say I’ve dreamed about it.”

Hongo pulled his fingers out of Miela’s mouth and she released them with a wet pop, licking her lips and looking up at him in search of praise.

“That doesn’t look very pink,” he commented, holding his fingers up to the light and licking them clean. “Is that all you can do?”

Immediately, Miela’s pleading gaze increased tenfold and she wildly shook her head. A quiet yelp escaped her as Shanks pulled her back into a sitting position, holding her in place just beneath her bust.

“It’s the sea stone, right?” he hummed. “You can do better, I know you can, baby.”

Miela nodded frantically, her breathing shallow, her heart thumping in her chest. Limejuice, meanwhile, was smirking suggestively to himself, just waiting to get out his trump card. Finally, Beckman prompted him to spit it out.

“The Slime Slime Fruit feeds off pleasure, mainly the pleasure its user pulls out of others, but also their own. The aphrodisiac gets stronger as pleasure builds up and the slime’s color changes to match.”

Lucky Roux grinned. “Well, the way that Marine ran after you, you’re really enjoying yourself, aren’t you, sweetie?”

“Yeah,” Miela breathed. “Couldn’t have done it without you. All of you, that is,” she added, letting her eyes wander once around the group.

“Greedy, aren’t we?” Shanks teased, letting his finger dance along the top of her bodice, grazing her skin. “Sounds like one man just wasn’t enough for you, huh? Don’t look so surprised; it’s very clear what you two did,” he muttered, lightly pressing down on a hickey just below the hem of her bodice. “Just say it: Was he enough?”

“... No,” Miela whispered. “I want more. Need more.”

“That’s a good girl. Then what do you say we get out of here, give you a tour of our ship?”

Immediately, Miela went stiff again, though just a little, her words barely a hint of resistance as she said: “I don’t do out-calls.”

“Who said that?” Roux scoffed.

“Don’t want to or don’t get to?” Yasopp asked.

“I’m very important to the business,” Miela explained, trying to keep her voice steady as Shanks kneaded her breast and Beckman was trailing his large hand up her thigh beneath the table. “Madam Rosie would hate to see me go, so— Ah— She doesn’t let me go with pirates or seafarers.”

“Do you want to?” Hongo asked, eyes pinned on the way her flesh gave in beneath his captain’s touch, molding right into his hand.

“Yeah,” she whispered. “Yeah, I want to. Please take me with you.”

“Then I’ll talk to your Madam and see what I can do,” Shanks declared with a smile, pressing a sneaky kiss to her collarbone. “Don’t worry, I can be very convincing. – Hey, Beck, be a good first mate and take over for me, will you?”

“With pleasure, Captain,” Beckman hummed, picking Miela up with ease and moving her over to his lap.

As Shanks left for the door behind the bar, Beckman pulled her snug against him with her back against his chest and her legs spread over his thighs.

One of his hands made its way under her skirt, holding her thigh just inches away from her core as Roux held her other knee in place, just for good measure. Beckman’s other hand continued where Shanks had left off, diving into her cleavage, tugging ever so slightly at the strings holding her bodice together.

“Alright, kitten, you’re gonna listen and be good for me, alright?” he muttered, letting his eyes wander across his crewmen as if he was instructing them on how these things were done. Truth be told, he was the most experienced at the table. “We came to this place because the Captain hasn’t been himself lately. He lost his arm, I’m sure you’ve noticed by now. So we took him here to take his mind off things and it seems like it worked. Sounds to me like he’s really into you, so you’re gonna be good to him and work the stress out of him, alright?”

Miela nodded, unconsciously grinding against Beckman’s lap. But he held her in place only a second later, letting his finger graze over the fabric of her thong.

“No, no, not yet. The Captain comes first. He needs someone to help him relax, take the reins for him, just let him let go and forget about the world for a while. Can you do that?”

“Yes, yes,” Miela chanted, her voice nearly failing her. “Just get those shackles off of me and I’ll do all that and more, I promise.”

“As soon as we’re on the ship, don’t worry, baby. And if you’re good, you’re gonna get a reward. Will you be good?”

“Yes, I will, daddy.”

----------

Only a few minutes later, the Red Hair Pirates were on their way back to the ship, alcohol and excitement coursing through their veins. Miela was sitting happily in Roux’s arms, feeding him the rest of the snacks they had stolen from the table.

Her eyes went wide the moment she spotted the ship, taking in every single detail and listening to everything the men told her about the vessel, even if her mind was in a very different place.

Finally, she was taken under deck, into a small hallway lined with doors. Roux placed her down, letting his hand trace up from her ass to her shoulders as he did.

“Easy, Roux, go wait your turn,” Shanks teased, a bright grin on his face.

He offered his hand to Miela, more of a formality than anything since they both knew what was to come. Still, she took it, and let out a quiet yelp as he pulled her closer.

“Alright, baby, remember,” he whispered, “if you want out, you just have to say it. Got that?”

“Got it. But I don’t want out, I want in.”

Shanks huffed as the rest of the crew chuckled. Within only a second, Miela found herself pushed towards the end of the hallway, towards a door with a weathered, gilded sign.

She opened the door without even being asked to, knowing that Shanks was behind her and leading her on. Giving in fully to her new situation, she stepped into a cabin, simple yet somewhat elegant.

But she didn’t have a lot of time to admire it as she felt Shanks come up behind her, pulling her in by her breast. She hadn’t really noticed it while they were sitting down for the most part, but all of the pirates were so much bigger than she was. Her head rested against Shanks’s chest as she came undone under his touch and she could feel his arousal pressing against her back.

“Eager, are we?” she breathed, whining as he brushed a finger over her nipple, further straining the strings on her bodice. “And you haven’t even tasted me yet.”

“I think it’s time to change that,” Shanks growled.

He pulled his hand out from underneath her clothes, then spun her around and pushed her towards the bed. Eagerly, she followed his lead until her legs hit the edge of the bed and she fell backwards, letting out a yelp.

Before she could gather herself again, Shanks was hovering over her, propped up on one arm as he kissed his way up from her cleavage to her face, drawing the sweetest moans out of her.

That was when he paused, his eyes glancing over to where his left arm had to be, as if he had forgotten for a moment. Well, Miela was determined to make him forget. All of his worries, she would erase them.

Swiftly, she pulled her arms out from underneath his chest and threw them around his neck, pulling him down into a kiss. Within merely a second, her tongue slipped past his lips, softly meeting his. The kiss turned deeper, wilder, and Shanks groaned as he could feel a familiar heat build up throughout him. When Miela pulled away, he keened at getting her back.

Instead, she placed a hand over his lips, tracing his jawline with the other before tugging at her bangles.

“I promise, it’ll be worth it,” she whispered, but she really didn’t have to.

Quickly, Shanks let himself fall on the bed next to her, then crawled up further on the mattress, posing himself like a picture from an erotic magazine. He beckoned her over and she followed as if he had her on a leash, pulling her in by the collar. The thought alone had her whimpering, fantasizing to a point where she slipped out of reality. Though it was only for a blink of an eye, when she returned to the present, she was nearly sitting on top of Shanks and he had his finger hooked into one of her bangles.

“Is it this one?” he asked, his voice hoarse with arousal.

Miela nodded frantically, looking up at him frantically. Suddenly, a surge of red lightning cracked within Shanks’s hand and the bangle sprung apart, shattered into pieces. A shriek left Miela at the sight, distracting her just long enough for her to miss the way he did it on her other wrist. But what she clearly didn’t miss was the way the tension flooded out of her body, a moan spilling over her lips.

Immediately, Shanks pulled her into a ferocious kiss, his tongue picking up as much of the sweet aphrodisiac in her mouth as he could, clinging to her as if he were a starving predator and she his prey. He let out a little noise of desperation and his hand twitched along her spine, clearly conflicted on whether to keep holding her or to tear her clothes off. One hand just wasn’t enough.

That was when Miela remembered Beckman’s words. Why would she have him choose?

She pulled away from him, her torso turning fully into slime as she phased right through his arm. An expression of worry and betrayal made its way onto Shanks’s face but it wouldn’t last for long.

As he still struggled to get his words out, Miela’s body went back to normal and, with one precise pull, she opened the bow holding together her bodice, her breasts quickly spilling into the space she had given them. Swift, practiced movements took her bodice apart fully, revealing all of her chest to him.

Shanks practically surged forwards, no longer able to hold himself back. A characteristic blush started tinting all of his body and his aching cock tented his pants, the aphrodisiac clearly taking full effect. He pulled her in by the small of her back, placing sloppy kisses all over her breasts before taking one nipple into his mouth and sucking hard.

Miela whined, digging her fingers into his hair and holding him close, her cunt clutching around nothing beneath her skirt. But not yet, she thought, not yet. The Captain came first, she told herself.

So, she gathered all of her leftover focus, as hard as it was as droplets of slime were leaking from her nipples, brought on by her pleasure. But she forced herself to concentrate, tugging at Shanks’s hair to get his attention. He looked up at her, eyes almost black as his pupils were blown wide by desire.

“Lie down for me,” she breathed, and he listened without another word, his cock twitching in anticipation.

As he laid back, she crawled over him, her body always just an inch from his. Then, before he could react, four pink tendrils spawned from her back, latching on to his shoulders and legs and holding him down. He moaned at the sensation, feeling the slime soak through his clothes and wetting his skin, sending shivers down his spine.

“Relax, daddy,” Miela purred, undoing his shirt buttons ever so slowly. “Let your baby take care of you.”

Shanks writhed beneath her, though not enough to break free.

“You’ve already done so much for me,” she whispered. “Let me make it up to you.”

Her hands wandered up and down his stomach and he moaned, all sense of logic and worry escaping him.

“Please, baby, please,” he breathed, his words getting lost in little whimpers as she placed little kisses across his chest, travelling lower and lower, but turning right around before she got to where he needed her.

Finally, she moved back, looking unbearably pretty as she sat between his legs. Keeping her eyes locked with his, she pressed a hand against his clothed erection and he came, his entire body going rigid as he shuddered, pleasure washing over him.

Miela’s eyes were filled with adoration and desire as she watched him go limp, knowing that it would only last for a moment. Just a few seconds later, he was getting hard again, and she ran her fingers up and down his happy trail, finally hooking them into his waistband. She pulled his pants and his underwear down in one go, her mouth watering at the sight of his cock.

Looking up at him for permission, she licked a long stripe from the base up to the tip, then wrapped her lips around his dick, bathing in his deliciously sinful sounds. She gave him a few seconds to calm down, then she started bobbing up and down, taking more of him into her mouth each time. It didn’t take long for her to take him all the way to the base, his cock forming a bulge in her throat. How the hell she could do that Shanks didn’t know, but he frankly didn’t care either, the sight just far too hot to him as his hips kept bucking off the mattress – and the way it felt, all hot and slick… He could feel his orgasm building up quickly, his mind turning to mush as he felt himself slip in and out of reality.

“‘M close,” he gasped, his voice barely serving him anymore. “I’m close, baby, so close—”

The tendrils barely had to hold him down anymore; he didn’t even think about resisting. This was bliss, pure bliss, even if he couldn’t hold her. Miela hummed against his cock in approval, sending vibrations through his entire body. When she started gently massaging his balls, it was all over for him and he came again, white hot pleasure taking away his vision and almost knocking him out.

Miela was clearly very pleased with herself, making a show of swallowing and sticking out her tongue, even if he couldn’t see it. She pressed a kiss to the tip of his cock, then crawled upwards to lay beside him, her slimy tentacles gently massaging his chest and limbs. Slowly, Shanks’s eyes fluttered open, being met with Miela looking at him in adoration.

“How do you feel?” she asked, softly tracing his jaw.

Shanks’s heart was pounding in his chest, his answer mindless as he said: “More. Please, just one more, I wanna see you come for me baby.”

Miela let out an excited giggle and she gave him a quick kiss before sitting up again and stripping out taking off the rest of her clothes.

“I knew you had it in you,” she cooed, moving over to straddle him.

Shanks used what little strength he had left to push himself up and put his hand on her hip, breathing shallowly as one of her tentacles eagerly pumped his dick, Miela fingering herself at the same rhythm. Droplets of slick dripped down her thighs and onto his hips, making him shiver with anticipation.

As soon as he was hard, Miela licked her fingers clean and lowered herself onto his dick, whining at just how full she felt. Shanks fell back onto the mattress, the way her walls clenched around him taking him to the brink of overstimulation. He was sure that he could’ve come from the feeling of being inside her alone if he hadn’t been so spent from his two orgasms before. 

But he wanted her, he needed her, and so he bucked his hips up into her, making her gasp. He reached out for her and she understood, leaning over him and steadying herself on either side of his chest as she started moving her hips against his at an increasingly fast pace. Quickly, he pulled her bandana off her head and ran his fingers through her hair, delighted to find a small pair of mouse ears underneath. This woman was full of surprises, he thought at the back of his brain, but yet another surprise made his mind go fully void.

One of Miela’s tentacles had made its way down to his ass, stretching him out gradually with every movement of his and Miela’s hips. He groaned in pleasure, tangling his fingers into her golden locks as he held her close. It didn’t take long for the tentacle to slip inside fully, mirroring the way his cock was pushing into Miela’s cunt. He was sure that he could feel the contour of his own dick against his stomach as Miela moved against him, and just the thought of him being just as full sent him spiralling, pushing him over the edge as he came harder than he had ever come before.

The tsunami of pleasure inside of him just didn’t want to stop, but he could faintly tell that Miela had reached  her climax too, impaling herself on his dick like a creature in heat and pushing her head into his hand. Her cum dripping down his shaft and over his hips was the last thing he felt, completely exhausted and in utter bliss.

Meanwhile, Miela panted as she came down from her high, placing her head on his chest to rest for a moment. His heartbeat was fast for quite a while, then became slower as his breathing calmed down, his body falling into a sound sleep. A tiny part of her was just a little disappointed that their time together was over, but most of all she was proud, proud that she had made a man like him feel this good.

Carefully, she climbed off of him, whimpering quietly at the loss of his dick inside of her. After all of that, she felt so empty. She tiptoed around the room and cleaned Shanks up to the best of her conscience and ability. Then, she did the same to herself and put her clothes back on – admittedly a little haphazardly, not really caring how she looked in the dead of night. Finally, she opened the door and slipped out as quietly as possible, careful not to wake him, her scarlet lover, forever her captain in her heart.

But as soon as the door was closed, she almost shrieked when she saw a figure in the hallway, leaning against the wall right next to the door and smoking a cigarillo. He brought his hand down over her mouth before she could scream, soothingly running his fingers through her hair. There was an air of intimidation about him, the way he blended into the darkness with his dark clothes and his raven-black hair with the few gray streaks. But most of all, he looked proud.

“Beckman,” Miela gasped, looking up at him with large eyes.

“By the sound of it, you really made him feel good,” he hummed, blowing a cloud of smoke into the air. It was an expensive tobacco, not like the stuff that most patrons at the bar smoked. The kind where you could smell the pleasant addiction even without tasting it. “Is he asleep?”

Miela nodded, her muscles tensing up in the most delicious way.

“Good girl… But you didn’t forget about your reward through all that, did you?”

“No, of course not,” she whispered, that coil in her stomach already winding up again.

“Are you ready for me?”

“Anytime, daddy.”

“That’s what I thought.”

And just like that, she felt his hand between her shoulder blades, pushing her into the next door over.

The rest of the night became a frantic blur, with Miela passing from one arm to another, exiting one room just to enter the next… It was wild, it was frantic, and the exhaustion was tugging at her limbs, but she had never felt better, never felt so alive. Those words from Limejuice travelled through her mind at some point, about how her devil fruit was keeping itself fed through pleasure. With the way she felt that night, up until now, she must have been starving.

By the time that the sun came up, Miela was lying on one of the beds in the infirmary, panting with pleasure as she passed out from the exhaustion, her clothes long since discarded in some corner of the ship that she couldn’t care to remember. Hongo was hovering over her, dutifully tying his hair back as he grabbed a syringe from the side table. His work for the night was far from over.

----------

When Miela woke up the next morning – or what was presumably the next morning to her – her body felt like mush. At the same time, she had never been as well-rested and relaxed. A slight sway of her world told her that she was still on the Red Hair Pirates’ ship and her cheeks went pink as she remembered the events from the night.

She pushed herself up from her bed, a thin blanket falling off her torso. Half of her had expected herself to be naked, but she wasn’t – in fact, she was wearing a shirt that was most definitely not hers. It was large and made of cotton, smelling heavily of sea salt.

“Morning, princess,” she heard a familiar voice say from across the room.

A smile spread across her face as she blinked her eyes open and found Hongo watching her from his desk in what could only be the infirmary. He was holding a large cup of coffee, observing as she let her eyes wander around the room.

“I was wondering when you’d be waking up. You were enjoying yourself, clearly. Kept me up all night.”

“Sorry,” Miela muttered, her mouse ears drooping down ever so slightly.

“Eh,” Hongo shrugged, “at least I got something out of it. Do you want breakfast?”

“No, no, I don’t wanna be a bother, I—”

“You’d be more of a bother by saying no since Lucky Roux said I’d only get me my breakfast once you get yours. Lazy Roux more like it, he just doesn’t wanna walk here twice.”

“That’s… Alright then. Maybe just a little bit.”

“A little bit – you need a proper meal, not just something to nibble. With the amount of exercise you got last night, you can’t tell me you’re not hungry.”

“I— Well—”

“See? You’re getting a proper meal. Alright?”

“Yes, Doctor.”

“Good.”

As Hongo swiftly walked over to the exit and stuck his head out into the hallway, Miela looked around the room some more, finally getting caught on a window.

Suddenly, she paused. She rubbed her eyes and crawled forwards to get a better angle, not wanting to believe what she was seeing. Her weird headache wasn’t really making it easier. But when reality finally settled in, she shrieked, hopping off the bed and sprinting across the room to cling on to Hongo’s arm.

“Hey, hey,” he called, “you’re not supposed to get all riled up after surgery!”

“Surgery?!” Miela echoed, but she was promptly ignored, picked up by the waist and put back down on her bed.

“What’s wrong? What are you so upset about?”

“What’s wrong?! Hongo, there’s no land! We’re on the open sea!”

“So? That’s where pirates are supposed to be.”

“You kidnapped me!”

“Kidnapped? No, we gave you a free vacation.”

Steps came trampling down the hallway and, one by one, the other men that had swept Miela off of her feet last night came piling into the room.

“Ah, so she noticed!” Shanks concluded with a grin. “How are you doing, princess?”

“I— Panicked?! I’m not supposed to be here!”

“Now who said that?” Snake questioned.

“My Madam!”

Beckman, meanwhile, pushed his way past the other officers and sat down next to Miela on the bed, pulling her into his lap and soothingly rubbing her back.

“Well, we could just put you back,” Yasopp lied, picking at his sash in feigned disinterest, which would have been comical if Miela hadn’t been so worried.

“But you’d be missing out on a lot,” Roux added. “Living off of tips and a lousy salary, is that really how you wanna live?”

“No, but—”

“Well, what more do you want?” Limejuice smirked. “Chances are we could give it to you.”

Miela’s eyes sparkled at those words and her heart was beating heavily in her chest, a change in pace from the light yet frantic rhythm of her worry. Still, there was  a persistent seed of doubt in her mind, something that everyone else just had to know. By the way they were looking at her, they must have had this planned out for a while. Had they perhaps been watching her from afar for days? Had they decided they would keep her from the moment Shanks had had her in his grasp for the first time?

“Besides,” Hongo muttered, taking a casual sip from his coffee, “now that you don’t have that tracker in you anymore, you’re free to go wherever you want.”

A sound somewhere between a gasp and a shriek jumped out of Miela’s throat and she reached up for her ear, only to feel the bumpy profile of sutures right behind it.

“How did you even know?” she breathed.

“The Captain could hear it while you were in his lap,” Beckman explained, calmly rubbing her arms. “The little noise of static from the earpiece that was connected to it. Fancy bit of technology but once it’s out, it’s out.”

“It wasn’t even that deep below the skin,” Hongo muttered. “Sloppy work if you ask me.”

“Well yeah,” Miela breathed, “anything else would be expensive.” She was still trying to process everything, her heart and body working hard to overrule her mind. With every second, the last bits of logic became quieter and quieter. “So, what are you saying?” she stammered. “You kidnapped me and did surgery on me so I would join your crew?”

“Not join our crew, no,” Shanks chuckled. “As far as I know, you can’t fight, and you don’t look like you’re fit for any hard labor that has to be done on a ship.”

“Oh.”

“But then again…” He mumbled, a wide grin spreading on his face. “We could probably keep you as a pet.”

Immediately, Miela went beet-red, her heart damn near jumping out of her chest with a gasp of surprise. She stared at the Captain as his officers cheered and whistled, Beckman just silently holding her close. That was when her last bit of resistance snapped.

“Do I get a collar?” she breathed.

The men broke out into laughter, Beckman rewarding her with a kiss to the temple, just inches away from her surgery wound.

“The prettiest one we can find,” Shanks promised.

What followed now was a little discussion between the men of what color would most suit her, if they should go for sturdy leather or something more decorative, if they should add a leash… Miela basked in their attention, until her mind returned with full force and a lightning strike of fear made her body go rigid.

“W-wait!” she blurted out.

“What, you don’t like ruffles?” Roux teased.

“No, it’s— That’s not what I meant, I give you full freedom to pick on that but— There are some people out there who won’t be very happy that I’m with you now.”

“Like who?” Shanks chuckled.

“Don’t tell me you fucked a Celestial Dragon,” Yasopp scoffed.

“Ew, no!” Miela gasped. “Just… high-ranking Marines, for example.”

“Ah,” Snake smirked. “Madam Rosie’s special guests, huh?”

“Well, I was in for the money on those but… Well…”

“Just say it, baby,” Beckman encouraged her. “They’re just Marines, nothing we can’t handle.”

“Vice Admiral Borsalino will most likely be coming after me.”

That was when the men broke out into laughter, Shanks getting out a simple “Oh, just him.”

“He can be reasoned with, don’t worry, kitty,” he declared. “Get settled in, we’ll keep an eye out for him.”

With those words, he gave her a friendly wink, then pushed his way out of the room.

“You got anyone higher?” Limejuice giggled.

“Well, he’s in line to become Admiral I hear, so… Actually, there’s— Um—”

“Yeah?”

“Well… monkeydgarp.”

Beckman nearly choked on his own spit, losing his composure for a moment before he broke out laughing.

“WHO?!” the rest of the crew demanded to know almost in unison.

“The Hero of the Marines, Monkey D. Garp,” Beckman muttered, shaking his head with a chuckle. “I can’t say I’m surprised. How many nightcaps did it take?”

“Fewer than for Borsalino,” Miela mumbled. “But it was only one time!” she then added more loudly. “I wanna be very clear that it was only one time. So, no, he will not be throwing cannonballs at you, and he will not be giving a damn about whether I left or not. Neither will I be giving a damn if he does get upset about me leaving – though he does have incredible stamina for a man of his age, it needs to be said— Ow!” she gasped as Beckman lightly smacked her over the head, making her chuckle.

Meanwhile, the other people in the room were going through various stages of grief, with Yasopp covering his face and moaning about he’d never be able to look at Garp the same way again and Limejuice regretting that he had ever asked.

One by one, they started slinking out of the room and Miela was left behind with Hongo and Beckman, the former sighing under his breath that he’d have to check her for mental illnesses.

“You can be glad you still have everyone wrapped around your finger from last night,” Beckman murmured. “But next time you pull something like that, I might have to think of a punishment for you,” he said, pulling her off his lap and setting her back down on the bed.

“I’ll be looking forward to it, daddy,” Miela replied in a sugary sweet tone, only for him to lightly smack her in the shoulder.

“Go to sleep for a few more hours. You’re clearly not in your right mind yet.”

He kissed her on the forehead, then left the infirmary to go back to work. This left Hongo as the only one still in the room with her. Hongo, who was currently pouring a generous amount of rum into his coffee.

“I’m starting to think that you’ll be stealing more than just my sleep. You’re also taking my sanity.”

“Well, as long as I can give you something in return,” Miela purred.

“Yeah, you better.”

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[birchbow]

I am very autistic about theology and in particular, hotly debated theology and it is very Interesting that apparently that extends to clown religion 😅 all that to say, I am well And truly obsessed with the mirthful scripture, it is So Good

Do you have any tidbits or fun facts about clown church? Like, are there denominations? How often do the clowns on the blessed come to blows about scriptural interpretation(bc I went to a religious college and it sure did come close like, a lot of times) or anything else you want to share!

I was raised in religion but am in no way a scholar or active practitioner so I'm glad that my weird hybrid clown religion is passing muster lol. As somebody who's mostly going by the Vibes, uhhh, let's see.

I'd assume that yes, there are denominations in a sense, especially out on outpost ships that have little subsets of The Family that aren't directly connected to the main church fleet. We aren't likely to see as much of them in PoF because it's set essentially in the Clown Vatican. Considering this is a religion based on chaos and clownery, it seems reasonable to me that it's less that there are broad denominational categories and more that everybody's kind of doing their own thing. Sometimes there are groups of people who all believe similar things, but I don't know that most of them would be centralized or codified enough to have names like human religious denominations do!

Much like most things in troll society, it's a game of knowing what the people in power will let you get away with. Rakhem, the GHB before Kurloz, was a lot more strict about bloodcolor doctrine, and would actively cull non-purple quadrants of church members if he caught them on board--but he didn't much care about people asking what he considered wishy-washy bullshit philosophy questions about "what if the messiahs were people like us?". His concerns were about spies, traitors, adulteration of the church, etc, and he was incredibly concerned with how the Messiahs had blessed seadwellers with colder blood than him, and also with culling pretty much every lower blood he ran into. Kurloz doesn't comparatively give much of a shit about that! He considers the people who say off-color faithful are fine to be kind of weird and doesn't really agree with them but also doesn't consider their whole deal overtly sinful enough to be worth his notice as long as they're not, like, bringing lowbloods into the flagship chapel as equals right in front of him. But he gives a whole hell of a lot more shits about people who vocally question the divinity of the messiahs or deify trolls.

Anyway all this to say things have relatively settled down over the last several hundred sweeps but I do still think that compared to the religions humans are used to, Clown Church must be pretty constantly in wild flux, and vary a lot from person to person. Relatedly:

Yes there are definitely fights over religious doctrine and scripture interpretation, on a scale from "aggressive slam poetry" to "somebody just got mauled" depending on how mad both people are about it. Sometimes your deviation from the norm is dramatic enough it gets crushed in a bloody inquisition from the Grand Highblood, but sometimes it was just something you thought of that felt true, but when you brought it up in theological discussion you got your ass kicked multiple times over it. And either reconsidered, headed off to a more distant outpost ship where people gave less shits, or learned to keep your mouth shut haha.

[jasper-pagan-witch]

As far as book recs, what books are the least "suspicious"-looking title-wise, like in a won't weird your family out too much way?

This is an interesting question because I'm objectively the least weird person in my immediate family as far as books go. But I'll give this a shot! I'm gonna avoid books with "witch" in the title, but honestly, I have no idea how wary your family may be of books.

The Farmer's Almanac of the year: Once you get past the advertisements, there's a lot of practical growing advice and a surprising amount of magic-related stuff. Well, astronomy/astrology-related stuff, but still. I started using these as of earlier this year and have both the 2022 and 2023 editions. Jasper Category: Regional/Personal Practices.

Roots, Branches & Spirits by H Byron Ballard: My first introduction to the concept of folk magic was this wonderful book on Appalachian folk magic. It inspired me to look a lot more local and eventually led to me finding the Ozark Magic series by Brandon Weston. I'm not sure if it's particularly telling to the casual observer, but it's a fascinating look at someone's personal journey into their local magical tradition. Jasper Category: Regional/Personal Practices.

Badass Ancestors by Patti Wigington: I've gone over this book before, but if you're trying to learn about ancestor work (or even just your ancestors), it has some valuable resources and ideas of where you can look. It's useful enough that it's made it into my reference stacks. Jasper Category: Miscellaneous.

Willow and Sage Homemade Bath and Body: More of a magazine than a book, my May/June/July 2022 edition is a very practical guide for making all kinds of products. I look forward to actually trying out the recipes. It's not magic by any means, but it's helpful. Jasper Category: Miscellaneous.

Pretty much any mythology or history book: We all have those periods of time that we go absolutely batshit over mythology and history, right? Right? Yeah. This is also where my copies of the Homeric Hymns, the King James Bible, and others are located. Jasper Category: History, Religion, and Mythology.

Do I Have To Wear Black? by Mortellus: Likewise, this is an in-depth look at the various religious funerary and mourning practices, especially in modern contexts, brought to us by someone who actually works in that field. Jasper Category: History, Religion, and Mythology.

Regional ghost stories: I happen to have several Missouri-based or Mississippi River-based books on ghosts. These help take a look at folklore, history, and how things evolve and change over time, as well as how they stay in the public consciousness. Jasper Category: History, Religion, and Mythology.

Regional farming/planting guides: Similarly, I'm in Missouri, so a good number of my gardening guides are either about planting indoors, planting edible plants, or planting things that work great here in Missouri. Jasper Category: Gardening and Plants.

Historically- or locally-significant books of folktales, poetry, and fiction: We've got Edgar Allen Poe's complete works, we've got the Brothers Grimm, we have five great Greek tragedies in one book, we've got Horrible Phobias Lovecraft's works (may he rest in the racist squallor box and may he spin in his grave over everyone wanting to kiss his monsters), we've got Dante, we've got the Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows, we have "Jasper ran out of money but keeps trying to wipe out the book store's shelves of any significantly-old book with a new or fancy cover EVEN IF THEY ALREADY OWN IT." We've got the range. These are great for summoning up specific feelings or memories, for coming up with chants, for pop culture magic, for everything! And if anyone asks, you're just a fan of the classics! Jasper Category: Old Shit.

Unfortunately, most of my beginner-focused books, my tarot books, my spellbooks, and my correspondence-based books are a lot less low-key.

I hope this gives you a few ideas! I'm sorry if this isn't particularly helpful, I'm just not in a place where I have to be worried about people seeing that I practice magic. I mean, I have 62 tarot and oracle decks lined up on my shelves, it would be foolish of my family to NOT notice.

~Jasper