#but it could also be blood sugar weirdness because (like last time this happened) I was delayed eating lunch by like an hour and a half

[tj-crochets]

okay crafting is probably delayed again I possibly overdid it today and had another flareup of Weird Bad but it did not result in Unexpected Floor Time this time so I think I'm getting better?

[giddlygoat]

loved that description of their dynamic!! i can see why the ship is so appealing :o do yoy imagine there's any hostility/bad blood/complicated feelings between each other if, for instance, felix gets a moment with turbo in his bug form, after everything's all gone to shit? how would they react to each other (especially with felix being more w calhoun)?

oh, absolutely.

some time after the turbo incident, i personally headcanon that turbo sought out felix and attempted to explain himself to the nicelander. after all, he was injured, and turbo never wanted to live all by himself in the bowls of central station anyhow. felix was understandably horrified by turbo’s recent actions, claiming he wanted nothing to do with the racer, but he wouldn’t just let turbo die either [i imagine he had a pretty severe leg wound that wasn’t healing properly] so he automatically offered to fix turbo’s leg. [i still hc that turbo used a cane from then on due to code weirdness or something? still workshopping]

ANYHOW the point of all of this is to say that felix was going to turn turbo in to surge protector, insisting the racer needed mental help that felix was definitely not qualified to provide. turbo obviously couldn’t have that, so in a last ditch effort to save his skin, he dove into the code of fix it felix jr and hastily severed felix’s recent memories of turbo. the job ended up being sloppy and imperfect, but it accomplished what turbo was aiming for. felix no longer had any idea that turbo was still alive.

all of THAT is to say that when felix recognized turbo up on the big sugar rush cam, it was the first time that he had seen turbo since the RB incident [to his knowledge]. felix had long since mourned and moved on, having lots of time to process both the loss of his friend and his horrendous actions. seeing turbo again, only just as wretched as the last time felix saw him, was an ENORMOUS gut-punch. suddenly he was forced to grapple with the fact that his ex-partner had not only survived the arcade’s most unspeakable tragedy, but repeated the act, having taken over an unsuspecting game and lived there in hiding for years. all of that while ATTEMPTING TO MURDER A CHILD ON LIVE TELEVISION!

so yeah that’s why i think felix is 1000% disgusted by turbo BUT. i also like to entertain the idea of a reunion. realistically, i think felix would be terrified of cyng candy [get it? because cyng sounds like king and he’s a cy-bug? haha i’m so funny] and attempt to tell him off right before realizing he doesn’t stand a chance against the monster, at which point he would turn tail and run. candy could easily pin him down and hold him hostage, and it would be hard for him not to toy with felix like a cat might play with a terrified mouse.

but i think the dynamic would shift once candy figures out that felix isn’t just scared of being ripped to shreds, he’s scared of what turbo specifically has become. like, it starts to show in felix’s behaviors that he’s confused and desperate for answers, and the deal is sealed when he blurts “what happened to you?!” with a horrified expression.

i can see candy flippantly monologuing about his steady decline into power-hungry madness, answering in excruciating detail how he got to be the way he currently is.

arachegeek i’m so sorry but i’m late for a thing and i have to run I’LL FINISH THIS POST SOON BUT I CANT SAVE IT TO DRAFTS SO!!! SORRY ☹️

[clatterbane]

I am feeling greatly vindicated about now, in a way that I am very aware is probably verging on bitchiness on this end too. But, some people just affect me that way.

What do we have here, through the portal? Starting cortisol levels toward the lower end of normal for that time of day. And also well within the normal range? The cortisol-stimulating hormone which is what goes screwy and gets overproduced to make your adrenal glands pump out too much cortisol, if the problem is on the pituitary end.

The point of this overzealous testing?

The dexamethasone suppression test is used to diagnose endogenous Cushing syndrome by assessing the lack of suppression of the hypothalamic-pituitary-adrenal axis in response to exogenous corticosteroids.[1] The first use of dexamethasone for diagnosing Cushing syndrome was in 1960 by Liddle; he developed a test based on the non-suppressibility of endogenous cortisol production in Cushing syndrome versus the physiological suppression in nonaffected individuals achieved by dexamethasone.[2]

So yeah, if you give someone even a single dose of dexamethasone (never mind the sledgehammer 8-dose multiday protocol they hit my endocrine system with!), their body should cut way back on its own cortisol production to compensate. If the regulating mechanism is borked, it will just keep pumping out the ACTH and then a bunch of cortisol anyway.

What happened in this case?

Whoosh!

Straight down within the expected time frame, from totally fine levels starting out. The usual low single-dose test would have more than done it, without fucking my blood sugar up or giving me its own version of the Prednisone Crazies to anywhere near the same extent. They are apparently looking for at least a 50% reduction in levels, and we have more than met that goal!

(Yeah, they are close enough drugs to have similar effects. I've unfortunately had to take courses of prednisone multiple times, mostly for particularly nasty allergic skin reactions. But dexamethasone is stronger stuff and the effects apparently last longer. 👿 I am very relieved to be done taking the shit as of like 6:30 this morning. Probably a few more days of lingering fun to look forward to.)

It was a dramatic enough drop during that first day, that the nurse actually went ahead and reassured us this morning that things were obviously perfectly fine there when I went in for the second steroided-up blood draw.

Gotta say the lab was quick! They drew the samples just before 8:30 again today, and the results were up on the portal when I logged in somewhere around noon. That clinic is right in the university medical center complex, but still.

They took so much blood the first time because the endo also decided to throw in All The Tests while she was at it. Including a bunch of the diabetes-standard ones that she already ordered before the recent routine check-in appointment where she sprung this xenophobic concern-trolling bullshit on me in the first place. Also got expanded kidney and liver panels, what seemed like every other major hormone in my body checked, and a whole new battery of tests prompted by the chronic anemia. A lot of those repeats of what primary care just recently ordered (and she could see the results of) after she kicked that over to their side. At least it was just two tubes for the cortisol and ACTH today.

But yeah, at least nothing out of that huge battery of tests came back looking weird in unexpected ways! I am still slightly anemic, my sodium and potassium levels are still running just barely under range, and a couple of kidney indicators are still looking borderline wonky in a very diabetic way.

(Which seems to be staying pretty stable for years now, not even far off enough that anyone has seemed to feel like it's needed treatment--and it's frankly a miracle that my renal function isn't way more thrashed than that, after the number of years of earlier negligence and uncontrolled blood sugar. Ruined kidneys was honestly one of my big nagging worries while all of that was still going on.)

Anyway, one thing I WAS actually glad and somewhat relieved to see while scrolling through that huge mess of reports:

Because it was primarily a pituitary prolactinoma that I got removed back in high school. And especially with the healthcare mess back in the US? I am not aware of that ever having been checked again within the past 30 years. My family ended up uninsured within a year or two of the surgery, and the last follow-up probably happened in 1992-93. The symptoms thankfully did go away over time--along with the freaking cortisol side bonus staying distant history!

(None of which was the endo aware of when she decided I looked weird enough to constitute a medical problem, I just can't restrain myself from emphasizing again.)

The little fuckers do have a distressing tendency to come back sometimes. But yeah, BTDT and I am pretty confident that I would have noticed if that were causing problems. But, I am still glad for the confirmation that my prolactin levels are fine now.

This whole thing was, indeed, uncalled for. And I am still perversely gratified to be proven right about this, when it's been taking up so much rent-free space in my head. (Thanks, PTSD!) And also to see that I am honestly looking healthier across a whole slew of bloodwork measures than I was half-afraid I might.

[mythicaldemigoddess-of-deltarune]

Earth Angel In Wing & Sweater-Town (2024)

------------

Credit for Transformers goes to Hasbro

Credit for Steven Universe goes to Rebecca Sugar

Credit for Undertale goes to Toby Fox

Credit for Hazbin Hotel goes to VivziePop

Credit for Red Vs Blue Series goes to Burnie Burns & Rooster Teeth

Credit for Halo Game Series goes to Bungie

Credit for Buzz Lightyear Of Star Command goes to Disney

----

in case some might not be able to read the words very well, I think clicking on the drawing to make it bigger might help...I'm saying this before I post this, in case it might not be big enough to read the words unless one clicks on it...

I also decided use the angelsona tag for this, because technically the Earth Angel in the drawing is suppose to be me, in both wing and sweater town.

I would of posted this on January 6, 2024….the day I drew it, but there was a bit of a problem with Tumblr it would appear…which the info about it says it was being worked on and trying to fix it.

I was feeling a bit in a sad mood some hours ago on January 6th, before I drew this drawing on the same day, but maybe I can talk about it another time.

and while I did check once more, a few minutes later…it appeared that Tumblr was back to normal again, but I decided to wait until January 7, 2024 to post this.

also there can be different reasons why some Humans and Humans who are Earth Angels, to fall under the 8th Sin…some of them being because of Other Humans and Eon-Boomer Angels/Fallen Angels. and even if I know I don't really have the power to, but if I had lost my second cat because they weren't taking to the vet on time or those who work at the vet messed up and I lost my fluffy baby because of it…

I would cause Omnigeddon…also my day was doing a little okay on January 6, 2024 and I had plan to play some video games as well, but then something had to put me in a not so great mood and so I had to go to bed to sleep it off…

well at least some other stuff that happen later after what put me in a poor mood, end up making me feel a little more better. and yeah, the one who is hiding in both wing & sweater town is suppose to be me…

ya can't really see me, only know that I'm hiding behind energy wings and a sweater because the drawing is suppose to match how I was feeling because of some some humans…

I think sleeping the 8th Sin off helped a bit, well that and some stuff that ended up making me feel better…at least I watched a few episodes of Ah My Goddess and some episodes of Sailor Moon before that thing that I saw that put me in a gloomy mood.

Alastor being able to use Earth Angel Magic, does seem like a interesting idea…the idea is that he uses the pendulum to find where I am, which is in wing & sweater town.

and I guess if I had to talk little bit of what made me feel unhappy and think as well feel like I'm under the 8th Sin during that time, it has to do with that bad mouthing about Alastor… hopefully things will work out….

and ya know, it be interesting if he could use a pendulum even in ways I may not be able to, even though it did freak me out at first when I was holding a pendulum for the first time and it started to move around like crazy…

the chance of Alastor also being RH Negative, is perhaps very VERY small…but I'm going to view him as being RH Negative in the Fanon… speaking of that, I am going to at least try to see if I can at long last, get to the whole checking my blood type again…and yeah I get your blood type is with you for the rest of your life.

but I guess it's freaky to have O RH D Negative Blood, and your own Mom has O RH Negative Blood, but where did the "D" part come from…?

and yeah I'm weird, one of my weird thoughts is that I don't want Jesus, Antichrist, and Archangel Samael to harm Mother than she was already…

and by "Mother" I mean the Omni-Mom, and by that I mean the Goddess. I can still believe in Jesus, but if he is a part of that mess along with Archangel Samael…

well I'm not going to agree with it, and he still needs to be saved from himself if some stuff I read that has to do with him turn out to be true.

also no one is gonna change my mind about believing in both God and Goddess, not even that Toxic-Religious jerk who should of just shut up when I pointed out how bad that they were making me feel. hopefully they aren't doing that to more people.

I'm going to hope other Earth Angels finally wake up to the truth, but it should be of their own free will. but in case not all Earth Angels wake up to the truth, I might as well go solo until more Earth Angels finally wake up to the truth.

even if things are a bit more better for most women and girls (even if it isn't at 100% and is likely around 99% or 98% or maybe around 95%)

but we still need to finally see that one of the problems…is that Omni-Mom was harmed as well as the Divine Feminine energy, and it took probably a super long time for her to get a bit more better.

I think when I can, I will do another drawing ship of Wasp x Lazuli (from Transformers Animated & Steven Universe), and another Mamtella drawing (Mammon x Stella's ship name), that ship name still seems like some kind of food ya eat.

even just talking/writing about that ship name Mamtella, it made me hungry…I can't help that their ship name reminds me of food. XD well me being my weird self is better than being gloomy and possibly going all 8th Sin at times…I could make a list as to what causes me to become under the influence of 8th Sin…

and once again the whole "Eveningstar" has to do with the weird thing with my Mom, and how she NEVER got Morning sickness with me, but instead got Evening sickness.

I rather be called a purple blood than a blue blood, cause at times blue blood can mean another thing…some might know very well if they had looked it up before.

so I'm glad that only some of my Ancestors were Royals and some weren't, I wouldn't be a purple blood if it weren't for both my royal and non-royal ancestors. :D

I'm a Weird Earth Angel Princess, even if I don't work 100% like Other Earth Angels and I know I'm a Defective Earth Angel.

anyway, I had to draw how I was feeling, like the feeling of wanting to go to both wing and sweater town and not come out of wing and sweater town for a while…or it could be called wing-sweater town…

and yes, I know that Flowey has pink eyes in this, it was on purpose. Sari is holding Andy from Red Vs Blue, and right next to her is Tucker's Son, who could have small bits of Human DNA even if he doesn't appear Human at all.

both Andy and Sari are right about Humans, some of them are Shisno but some of them aren't and don't act like a bunch of Shisno…

so in other words, for the Humans who don't act like a Shisno and aren't Shisno at all, it means there is still hope for Humans.

and hopefully some humans will try not to act like they are better than some who have a biracial or multiracial heritage, even if not all humans are like that…

but ya know it is still possible some are still out there, and are gonna insult some other humans and even humans who are earth angels who have a biracial or multiracial heritage.

and even if some humans don't mean to come off like it, like those who really mean it, they might not fully understand that they could insult and bring about not so great feelings to some.

I also think that even if I try to explain about it, it is likely my words will be misinterpreted…..

it wouldn't be the first time, though at least half of the time my words got misinterpreted, it wouldn't be as bad and I might be able to explain a bit better than how it first came out, so in other words some small misunderstandings are fine so long as they don't end up hurting someone's feelings in a very bad way.

but I know it is possible even if I try not to let some of my words get misinterpreted, it doesn't mean it wont still happen at times and the times that it does, there will be a chance my feelings will get hurt as well.

and yeah, it might be best that I don't get too into the whole why some are hating on Alastor, but I'm going to still hope that things work out the right way and he appears in many future episodes, well the future episodes he will appear in.

I know that in some shows, even some characters who are part of the main characters, will at times not appear in a episode but will in the next.

one of Alastor's powers is Radio Manipulation, and from the powerlisting fandom, there is a list of names that show what it is also called by…

like Radiofonokinesis, Radio Distortion, Radio Wave Manipulation/Control, Radio Frequency Manipulation/Control and just Radio Control.

even if I had that weird thing happen with one of the radios we have, which by the way I think it might only happen once in a while with me, so that might be a good thing.

and one of the other powers that Alastor has is being able to use tendrils, which is also listed in Darkness Manipulation, of course it says Applications and it has Darkness Solidification.

there is also something that says manipulate the properties of darkness/shadow.

and we could view in the episode Alastor first appears in, he was using both Radiofonokinesis and Umbrakinesis, which one of the other names of Darkness Manipulation would be Shadow Control/Manipulation, Erebokinesis, Dark Control/Manipulation, Sciakinesis and Achluokinesis and yeah also the Umbrakinesis.

and for all we know, the reason he could be so powerful is because in his human life, he was of the Nephilim Bloodline, even if not being a full Nephilim, but there are some Earth Angels who do come from the Nephilim Bloodline.

not like we can help that, we aren't our Nephilim Ancestors. and calling us (by me and others) who have RH Negative blood, and who have Nephilim Ancestors as just as evil and bad as them, is a foolish thing.

plus I can't help but wonder if Earth has been through a loop many times before, which has to do with what those Eon-Boomers and the harm it causes Omni-Mom.

like the whole "End of The World" may have happen many MANY like a lot of times before, and each time the Earth would go through a type of "rebirth" and go back to how it was before that mess happen. well hopefully that isn't true, well unless it happen in another timeline and we live in a new alternate branch of it…

I like this drawing, it might of help a bit more to get some feelings out, and yeah as weird as it might be, in the drawing, Alastor is using the pendulum to track and find a Earth Angel, which in Fanon (and Noncanon) could be seen as one of his abilities.

and even if it isn't a official title, I'm still gonna call myself The Embodiment of Weirdness. XD

well me being weird and silly is better than when I feel unhappy.

and I'm glad I feel better from how I felt yesterday, it sucked feeling like that...which I think when you have days when you feel a bit melancholy, that could be the 8th Sin for all we know...

and the best thing I think I can do when I get like that, is if maybe try to either sleep it off or maybe do some other stuff, like watching a movie or a show I like, or reading.

plus maybe gems can help with the feelings of melancholy, like you could feel that way at times but certain gems help heal it.

of course not everyone has to be open about the healing properties of gems. and I'm still keeping my gem bracelets on for the multi-purpose I use them for and only take them off when I truly need to.

I think the 8th Sin who is like the Embodiment of Melancholy, and the 8th Ring, would likely be Fanon and Not Canon in Hazbin Hotel and Helluva Boss.

so the 8th Ring and Embodiment Of Melancholy would be in like a Fanon AU version of the two shows.

Embodiment Of Melancholy, probably needs a nice and fluffy blanket around them, some comfort food, a nice movie to watch and if they want and give permission for it, a nice comforting hug.

even if I don't like to be touched sometimes, I don't mind getting a hug if that is truly what I want.

sometimes surprise hugs where I'm hug from behind, would likely startle me and I might not like it very much...even if some might not truly get why I might not like it but maybe some might get it if they feel the same about certain surprise hugs.

I think it was around last year/2023 or maybe it was 2022, that had one of my family members startle me when they hug me from behind...

anyway my angelsona in this drawing, mentioning about being under the 8th Sin's influence, just seem to fit because well I was feeling not great before but I think sleeping off and waking up to some stuff that made me a bit happy, may have helped.

anyway I hope some like this drawing, and understand why I put my angelsona self in wing-sweater town, because it was to express how I was feeling.

and yeah even if it isn't canon to Alastor's powers, I like the idea about him using Earth Angel Magic in the Fanon.

Viva La Weirdness, The Embodiment Of Weirdness Era! XD

[anotherdayforchaosfay]

I have seizures daily. Most of the time, they're small, relatively minor. Today? Bleh. Was playing Sims 4 when suddenly the room went whoosh, sound went weird, and I knew I was having a seizure. Not severe. The big ones haven't happened since I started my ADHD med.

I can't stand or walk without the ground feeling like a water bed mattress. My blood sugar has also crashed because my brain burns through when I have a seizure.

At least Husband has the day off. He was able to make something I could eat quickly and get my blood sugar up.

Shower will have to wait for a few more hours. Ugh.

Bodies were a mistake, and I need to recall parts*.

*Anyone who offers suggestions will be blocked. I'm epileptic, had my first seizures when I was 11, tried more than two dozen seizure meds and several of them are now illegal, "all natural" doesn't mean "effective treatment," have been resurrected twice, and live with neurological damage caused by the thousands of seizures I've had iver the last twenty years.

[sucktacular]

Cw health scare, passing out, food mention, weed + being high, mention of blood work/needles

Had a yucky time last night that was very scary and wanna vent about it

and honestly kinda hope maybe someone that has low blood sugar moments or panic attacks or whatever the fuck could give me some insight if you're comfy doing so!!

Other wise just ignore this post :3 I'm okay now! But obv will get it looked at, prommy.

Also cw disordered eating... I don't mean to do it for any particular reasons I'm just very bad at remembering to eat, eating enough, and having too low energy to make anything lately. I got fresh groceries yesterday night tho so I'll be back to eating right for a bit.

So I uh nearly passed out at 3am alone in my kitchen trying to make a sandwich and I'm kinda pissed that my body is shitting out on me and now I gotta go to the human mechanic and get my stuff looked over cuz uh... Not normal happenings

I got up after laying down in bed for a while trying to sleep but got hungry and I was a little zooted too to be fair. Collected myself. Got all dressed to leave my room and was totally fine. If it was from standing up too fast it should have definitely hit me by that point but I was fine.

Went down and took all the things out of the fridge I needed for a sandwich. Slow and meticulous , not too fast cuz I was stoned and like to take my time to be quiet. Opened the bread, got a plate, opened the mayo, mayo'd my bread, then I went to open the deli chicken and started greying out and getting really light headed and weak and shakey and cold. So I waited a moment and it kept getting worse so I sat down and propped myself in the corner of my cabinets to try and help. Drank my chocolate milk and tried to wait it out. I've had low blood sugar act like that before- cold, shakey, grey vision, weak, etc - cuz I've kind of always been really bad at making sure I eat meals and last night i had just been eating chips, crackers, and chocolate pretzels all night. Snjcjsbjdks. I've been snackless for a few days so I NEEDED snack overload.

Anyway it kept getting worse over the minute or two to the point my vision was like white and black tv static with tunnel vision. my head felt super pressurized and I couldn't hear? I've had tinnitus since I was a tiny child but it really felt like those movies when everything is muffled and all you can hear is a very tiny faint high pitch ring. I could barely hear my tinnitus which was ... Deafeningly silent and that's WEIRD. I've never heard... Nothing? So that was scary. My whole body felt sweaty and hot and I just didn't know really what to do.

I think it was low blood sugar but + weed made me have a panic attack? Maybe? Or really bad low blood sugar. Because I HAVE been having light headed episodes and feeling weak lately... Which I chocked up to vitamin deficiencies (B12, D, or iron are problems of the past so I started taking those every day for the past week or so.)

Kind of super mad doctor I saw last week insisted I don't need blood work and to just take my new meds, cuz there's definitely something going on here and while blood work probably wouldn't have stopped last night's episode from happening, at the very least I could be a step closer today than i am. :(

Uhm... Yeah anyway it was really scary and I was on the floor in the kitchen with just Frankie watching me for a hot maybe 2-5minutes... Hard to tell how long. Not a super long time but more than just like 1-2 minutes. Felt better. Tried to get up and finish sandwich making. Got grey and weak again. Sat down some more. EVENTUALLY my vision and hearing went back to normal. Finished my sandwich weakly and packed the stuff away sloppily and had to turn the hallway light on cuz I couldn't see in the dark at all. Went to my bed and ate my sandwich and still felt fucked but eventually went right back to normal.

I do still feel airy headed and not totally alert but that's been kinda how it's been this past few weeks.

So uh... Mmm. Don't like that at all. Phone on me all the time now. Doctor visit again soon for this issue specifically. Partner suggested it sounded like a panic attack or when they get a vasovagal response to needles and nearly pass out. I definitely got scared and panicked cuz it was awful and scary and felt like I was dying. I did some 5seconds in 5 seconds out breathing exercises and it helped quite a bit to calm and focus me in the moment. Which was neat! They ain't lying about those exercises even if you don't know what you're doing. Focus on the counting and the breathing in and out softly.

Uhm.... So yeah if anyone actually genuinely has a comment or experience with that I'd love to hear. Otherwise I'm okay so far today and keeping an eye on it...

Problem also is I don't... Well, I have agoraphobia basically and it's very hard for me to go to a doctor without help from a friend or my partner and I can't figure out any online telehealth things in Ontario that don't cost money or aren't just for prescription renewals so uh not sure what to really do. I know I need to get it looked into but my GOD you know how fear will make you not care for yourself? Gestures. I'm trying so hard not to jump to the conclusion that it might be pre diabetes because my family has no history thankfully but the signs arent looking good..

[thepringlesofblood]

Casting My Opinions Into The Void: d20′s Neverafter ep 1+2

this is the first d20 campaign im going to be following live and i am excited enough to do a lil post each week or so about it. mostly bc recycling and adapting and retelling and retranslating old stories that “everyone knows” is my whole shit. like i got a degree in the study of ancient greek and roman civilization (classics). my whole thing is reading old myths and plays that “everyone knows” how they go and seeing what each author/translator brings to the table.

anyway i watched episodes 1 n 2 and i am excited and my observations are below

(like if you were really into the Sisters Grimm series as a kid and are similarly excited for this lol the modernized fairytale characters in that series are literally called “Everafters” and its because it’s really good shorthand for the audience. i see you brennan i see you)

normally ppl who do the whole ‘dark/horror/thriller fairytale’ thing fuck it up bc they think it’s about the shock value, or about seeing how nasty you can get with it, so I usually avoid them, but after bingewatching a kadrillion d20 campaigns, I trust brennan to do it right. you have to find the core value/crux of what is horrifying about the story and tease it out, and play with the symbolism and icons of the original story to reflect that. and brennan fuckin delivered.

ep 1

folks, give a hand to the people who put detailed yet non-spoilery content warnings in the description. tbh dropout shows are setting the standard for sensitivity and inclusion in media. it’s so lovely to see a show w content warnings or pronouns put up onscreen and it just not be addressed. i am forever spoiled for any other kind of media tbh

at some point in the past, brennan found out he could make a really good realistic choking/gagging noise, and he has used it in every campaign since.

i appreciate the ‘scare off the meek early’ approach of it all.

th. the briars. the concept. the dead princes - UGH good backstory yall

i very much like the idea of becoming a ranger out of necessity, and because plants obey you on account of that whole feeding-on-your-blood thing

puss in boots using ‘pib’ as a nickname instead. of ‘puss’ or ‘boots’ - inspired

also zac is using his ‘smart little shit’ voice like he did w lapin and i am v excited.

look ill say it - the little red hen did nothing wrong and thats on that. i read that one when i was very little, it was on electric company or sesame st or between the lions, and i’ve always liked it.

so......anyone see how mother goose’s husband has the last name hubbard? like old mother hubbard lol

also there really is a Jack in so many stories, i’m glad we’re addressing this. little shit gets up to so much trouble

it feels like I have seen so many tired rewritings of little red riding hood, even though I can’t think of any off the top of my head. it’s usually a sort of surface-deep ‘girl power!’ situation. i’ve never seen one like this. i LOVE it. it was terrifying. the fact that we all just sort of accept ‘barbarian’ as a normal dnd class is kind of wild tbh, i like exploring that rage and its source.

Ep 2

saying the actual nursery rhyme in the context of being the nursery rhyme is so powerful. i fully didn’t understand what was happening to nat king cole (v powerful) until he was gone.

also, herr drosselmeyer - fantastic get. you have to talk about the sugar plum fairy at some point and they already went in hard on her in acoc so i love that they were like you know what, it’s weird uncle time.

(context: herr drosselmeyer is clara’s eccentric uncle with a bunch of automatons and he gives her the nutcracker)

also every production ive seen has his drip immaculate. 

my gender is this man’s cloak

Murph is the fucking ball again

“Please tell me how you’re a monster too so I don’t feel so alone” - Jesus Christ Emily Axford

Almost getting distracted by a bird instead of picking up v obvious plot hooks: pt 2

cinderella.......dude

Brennan really looked at K’s finale scene from mismag and went “how DID the mice get lithium?”

The POV of the mice - simplifying it makes it sound ridiculous, but if you really dig into the idea of the mice as sentient beings it’s horrifying.

Dude the symbolism…stepmother eating her kids bc they were always either a tool or an obstacle to her, of course they would be a sacrifice to her hunger for power.

i’ve always liked endings that have the stepsisters reconciling w cinderella bc in the end they were also victims of abuse and it wasn’t the same or the same degree of abuse as cinderella but they were still constantly on thin ice

can you tell that i rewatched d20 live recently and sobbed at adaine and aelwyn’s ending?

Cinderella stabbing the fairy godmother with the broken heel of the shoe that symbolizes both the ending she was meant for and the life that she was forced into. Turning that into glass armor. dude.

The pumpkin carriage rotting bc the fairy godmother is trying to make the happily ever after stay exactly how it is forever but nature decays and time passes and she can’t acknowledge that without realizing both that her role is in the story is over and not only does cinderella not need her anymore, cinderella doesn’t want her anymore, and maybe never wanted her in the first place. 

When puss in boots was asked what he wanted in life and he just said ‘to be comfortable’ #relatable like I know all this is gonna end with him realizing the value of love and friendship over material goods and I 100% agree with that but i feel like this goal or some variation of it are v common today and not often addressed in stories like this

Pinocchio swearing - 10/10. Also how the fuck is Lou doing a Pinocchio voice that perfectly straddles the line between hilarious and annoying. It’s ridiculous enough to always be funny, but sustainable and varied enough that it doesn’t grate on you.

i think we’re getting into “all the princesses in all the stories are all sisters” territory and i for one am THRILLED

"mirror, mirror.......leaned up against the wall”

we learn in this adventuring party that the OG concept for lou’s pinocchio is that he snapped off his nose so he would be able to lie, which is AMAZING. i fully did not put that together.

i am v excited for this battle, and v terrified.

[annbourbon]

A bit more about me:

* I'm hard of hearing and I use hearing aids since I have memory. I hate when people keep sending me audios.

* INFJ

* I have ADHD

* I'm about 5'0 (153) yes I'm a minion 🙄💀

* My favorite color is blue

* Hydrangeas are my favorite type of flower. Just don't cut them off. I prefer pots rather than dead flowers.

* My nose is really sensitive to smells so it's super useful. Except for that time when I got covid... it was like, my worst nightmare coming true.

* I love eating, especially pizza.

* I don't like candies. Just chocolate, cakes and fruit tarts, too much sugar and I'll throw it up cuz my stomach doesn't tolerate candies or spicy things.

* I'm intolerant to lactose and garlic. people tend to joke around me saying I'm a vampire (migraines and my sun sensitivity don't make it any better to cover up this issue... shhhhh please don't say anyone okay?)

* My favorite element is air. The second one's water. I could spend hours on the tub or pool.

* I have three cats and one dog.

* I have never been in love or in a relationship for that matter.

* I love musicals: Mamma Mia, Burlesque, SIX, Hamilton, etc. (If I don't know it, I will love to know more about it.)

* I don't have tattoos or piercings. I'm too coward for that kind of pain. But I love them. They're just not for me.

* My favorite game is Mystic Messenger

* I adore my family. It's far from perfect, but is good.

* I'm self-taught at basically everything: ice-skating, cooking, fashion design, writing, hence I'm far from being perfect. But I'm trying my best.

* I'm a workaholic. Literally busy all day.

* I don't smoke or drink. Except for champagne maybe and only special occasions. I don't like alcohol that much.

* I want to study or at least read more about architecture

* I also love musical theory, photography and documentaries lol

* I'm an environmentalist

* Despite my love for cats, I have always preferred bunnies. Horses come third.

* Most of my fashion designs were created between 10 to 13 y.o. so right now I'm just adjusting them and improving them. Which is why I'm studying and reading a lot about fashion design.

* I used to dislike sugar as a kid. IDK what happened lol but I'm now ruined because I love sugar a bit too much. So from time to time I go on a sugar detox. It's hard AF

* I started ballet when I was 18. You can do it too.

* Blood type: A

* My Astrology:

Sun's on Taurus 🐂 ♉ with ascendant on Cancer 🦀♋ and my Moon on Capricorn ♑🐐

Questions: (I actually had a dynamic with other people but the link it's acting weird so I decided to put them here)

Are you named after anyone? Yeah my mom called me Anna because of the Beatles, "Anna Go to him"

When was the last time you cried? Around November or December last year. There was a lot of drama going on and a group of people who was really toxic to me, I finally got my shit together and moved onto something better. I haven't cried ever since and I'm happy now! <3

Do you have kids? Nope

Do you use sarcasm? Sometimes lol

What's the first thing you notice about people? The eyes if they're close, their appearance if they're a bit far, the smell, if they're passing by and I'm a bit distracted.

What's your eye color? Hazel

Scary movies or happy endings? Both. Depends on my mood, and some scary movies are actually touching and have a bit of a good/happy (maybe sometimes bittersweet) ending. Life can be a happy, and beautiful story but also hard and terrifying one. So I like both. Depending on my mood and company. I'm the kind of person who watches scary movies alone, at night and then proceeds to sleep like a baby sheep. I also love to watch scary movies when I'm angry or pissed off with/at someone or something. But I also love romantic and comedic movies... yeah it depends.

Any special talents? Ummm lol I can eat even when I'm sick or in pain. Okay I'll say, um I can learn things rather quickly: maths, chemistry, biology, dancing, sports, drawing, writing, etc. I can learn anything and become rather decent at it. Anything. Except for bread. Just no. Have you guys seen Charlie Angels? When Lucy Liu gives them muffins? Yeah that's me with any kind of bread. And I've been trying to figure it out since I was 8 y.o. so there's no hope for me lol

Where were you born? Haven't decided yet lol ok no... Mexico. I'll omit the city since a lots of creepers and stalkers have been on my life already so I'm not going to share that kind of info.

What are your hobbies? Ballet (thanks to Barbie, Tchaikovsky and my mom lolol) and ice skating

Any pets? Two cats (actually I have three cats and a dog but one of the cats is my brother's and so is the dog, so I just have a two little fellas... I'm considering buying a Cavalier King though... I've always wanted one.)

What sports do you play/have played? (Gotta go and eat something so I'll be back lol)

Chess, volleyball, basketball, soccer, ice-skate, swim, run, walk/sprint, cheerleading, rock-climbing indoors and outdoors. And other stuff. But I don't remember everything I ever did, just the most relevant ones: Volleyball practices were hard as hell. I even fainted because of it. And I'm not the kind of person who tends to faint.

Basketball was embarrassing. I'm tiny AF!! But we were forced to practice on school so whatever lol

Favorite subjects in school? I never liked school. Like, at all. But funny thing is, after I became a homeschool student (bullying from peers and teachers) I developed a healthy curiosity and started to love every single subject. So thanks mom, thanks dad!

Dream job? I don't have one. As long as I can eat and study/do everything I love and like, I'm happy. I love being creative though. If anything, I want to keep working and studying and being creative.

I'm not married but my name's... yes I'm a Bourbon. Royal family. Either you hate it or love it because, history... lol

But I'd say I'm winning the lottery on the coolest last name ever.

If you have any other question I'm happy to oblige: Send asks. But be polite. Thanks 💕

[lucysweatslove]

Because I need to just... get it out, I guess (regarding the weird trigger this morning). TW: health, food/sugar, fasting, diabetes, weight, weight stigma, EDs, etc etc. There will be numbers of blood glucose readings.

So, years ago when I was on oral contraceptive pills (during the time of pseudo-recovery, btw), I also had a theory that they may make me mildly hypoglycemic. They don't, but I got a glucose meter + strips and stuff to test out the theory. I like data and numbers and whatnot, so it was kind of fun to just see how my body responded etc etc. I loved getting the data as I could in any kind of situation- how did my body respond to exercise? Did my glucose spike regularly? How and when? When I learned that CGMs existed, I loved the idea of them because continuous data that didn't involve several pokes. But, gotta prioritize people with actual diabetes, yeah?

I will also say: diabetes is one of those conditions that I have health anxiety after. There is a lot of fearmongering about food / carbs and diabetes. It's not so much about developing diabetes that makes me anxious but more so how I will be treated should I develop diabetes. The first issue: obviously as somebody recovered from a restrictive, weight-based eating disorder, being told I "should" restrict any food and/or lose weight (restrict calories) is terrifying. I literally cannot do that without it going into an unhealthy place. It's already hard to get atypical ana to be seen seriously, and to essentially be prescribed the diet that hurt me so much is terrifying. The second issue: people treat diabetes (specifically, type 2 and in some cases gestational) as a shameful disease that is your fault because of your weight. I want to be clear that I do not think there is anything inherently shameful about having diabetes of any type. It's just seen as this thing socially and I'm already hyper-aware of social perceptions of my body.

Back in 2021, my curiosity peaked when I found out about a company that gives CGMs to people who are higher weight. I decided to try it out- not in the sense of weight loss as this company wanted, exactly, but just to see how my body responds to various foods (especially to exercise). I didn't like the company itself as it demonized having blood glucose above 120 mg/dl in any capacity, even though it's totally normal / not an issue to have blood glucose go up to even 140 mg/dl or higher after meals. So I had a huge issue with how they wanted you to stay under 120 no matter what. But whatever. I didn't see anything then that was concerning to me except that when I do heavy cardio, I can get hypoglycemic, which I had already suspected but now how concrete data to say yes, it happens (glucose in the 40-50s mg/dl range).

The last time I had a "fasting" glucose level checked was about a year ago, when I had COVID and went to the hospital. I didn't have respiratory issues, but basically, the night I got sick, I got up to use the bathroom (feeling like I was going to throw up), and had a "near syncopal event" which isn't so much the issue as is the fact that when I felt like I might pass out, I collapsed onto the bathroom floor instead, and major muscles contracted and I couldn't move. Not full paralysis couldn't move, but my hands were contracted, I couldn't move my legs, etc. Rob was staying in his office (across the hall) as he had tested positive and we were trying to avoid me getting sick too. I was barely able to call him for help. He called paramedics, they brought me to the ED, I was able to move by then (it was about 45 min to an hour after), and then they did the CBC, CMP, etc. My glucose was slightly elevated at 108 mg/dl. My PCP wasn't too concerned- I was sick, and based on timing, she thought it was possible my body had pumped out some epinephrine which raises glucose a little bit.

The other day when I was rummaging for some AAA batteries, I found a (traditional) glucose meter and all the accessories. The strips weren't expired. I got curious last night and about 45 min after dinner decided to check my glucose. It was 114 mg/dl which is totally normal after a meal. But this had me very curious for this morning. So I decided to check it fasting again.

And this is where I got triggered, because it was higher than last night's post-meal value. At 116 mg/dl. I checked it again and it said 110 mg/dl. This seemed super weird to me, because that is very firmly "pre-diabetes" level, and I was kind of hungry. I found some old control solution, and tried that out... it read kind of high for the low control solution (60mg when it's supposed to be like 24-58 mg/dl) and low for the high one (like 214 mg/dl when it's supposed to be like 250-350 mg/dl). So my confidence in that meter is basically 0, but it still triggered that fear of developing diabetes.

Usually one-off readings like this aren't triggering in any way because I can explain it. If I was consistently eating high carb meals, okay. If there was evidence of delayed gastric emptying, okay. But my snack last night was vegetables + ranch dip (not many carbs at all), I've been quite active the past 5 weeks, and I even did a real calorie restriction where I was very meticulous for a couple weeks when I was worried about something going on with my thyroid. So by all accounts, my fasting glucose should be going down, not having a one-off high reading. I'm also not much heavier than I was last year- maybe a few lbs but it just feels very weird for there to be any impact on glucose and I just am confused by it.

I know not eating / skipping meals isn't going to do anything, but I'm just having a hard time actually getting myself to eat after this. It's irrational in every sense of the word, and I don't even know what I think will even happen (for example, glucose will not continue to drop with prolonged fasting, and I know this). So idk. I think it's more like, this feels like "permission." Like oh, if my glucose is actually high, nothing bad is going to happen if I just like, skip meals. Oh, you don't really need to eat unless your glucose is low. All BS but that's the only way I can explain this trigger.

[vamptastic]

endocrinology appointment is next month 👍 i need to start writing stuff down so the appointment goes well but i kinda don't know where to start. i guess the big things are:

-gonna ask to have my 17-hydroxyprogesterone tested to see if i could have N-CAH as it's often mistaken for PCOS. nbd if she says no, just curiosity, she may have already checked for it and i just don't understand the bloodwork properly. i know she already tested my response to cortisol but to my understanding that's only congenital adrenal hyperplasia and i could have noncongenital which would only show on that specific test.

-i need to figure out what is going on with my blood sugar and causing these crashes. i genuinely don't know if this is a new issue caused by metformin lowering my blood sugar or if it's been a lifelong thing and i am only just now figuring it out because a doctor told me what my random spells of dizziness and nausea were instead of brushing them off for the first time.

-if it's not the medication i need to know if my insulin resistance is getting worse and if that's causing it, and what i can do to mitigate it if it does. she'll be testing me for diabetes like always anyway, and she'll probably refer me to a nutritionist or talk to me about adding another medication if she finds that A1C isn't decreasing anymore

-i never got an ultrasound and i should probably pony up and do it already to check if i have anything in my fucked up reproductive system that could kill me. specifically want to ask if they can check for uterine fibroids since i match the symptoms almost exactly and it would help explain why i had abnormally heavy periods instead of skipping them like most people with PCOS do. obviously they'll check for cystic ovaries as well.

-i need to know exactly how bad things are potentially going to get wrt hormone access for me, and if i need to do anything to prevent medical issues if i do need to stop taking testosterone entirely

-i've had high levels of white blood cells on blood tests for like, a year now. they're not cancer-high but it's still weird. i'm very prone to asymptomatic infections though so i could just happen to be sick with an minor ear infection or UTI every time.

-if the lawyer is there i want to ask if it's a bad idea to continue with my name change or not

-i need a prescription for testing strips for my blood sugar monitor bc they're really expensive, also would be useful to have glucose pills or powder since i get nauseous during crashes and can't really eat

i've been having So Many issues since the last appointment and it's really frustrating because the last one she basically said it looks like I'm doing really well and my insulin resistance is under control and we stepped down the frequency of my appointments and then like three months later I started getting really bad blood sugar crashes. So I hope I can figure out what's causing it and get it addressed.

[jodilin65]

I don't think we'll ever have that much extra money, but instead of getting a Fitbit someday, I want to get a Garmin watch. I like the idea of it telling me how much sleep I need the next night—or day, of course.I tried to unblock the account that sent me that “Hey!” message on Pinterest, but I couldn't find my block list. I shouldn't have assumed it was someone trying to spam or scam me. I did reset my profile back to public, though, since there really isn't any reason to keep it private.

It's weird, whoever it was, because all they sent me was one word: “Hey!” Maybe they thought I was someone they knew or messaged my account by accident. If not, it makes no sense to send just “Hey.” Why not “Hey, how are you?” or “Hey, I like your boards” or something more specific than just a vague greeting? Because they were so vague and unclear, I was suspicious of them.

Josh. Josh, Josh, Josh, Josh. You know, he was just as wrong as she and I were back then. The correct thing would have been to tell her that she doesn't own the rights to any usernames and to come back when and if I steal her stuff or threaten her or something worth wasting his time over. So, I’m always going to have very mixed feelings when it comes to her. There's the cautious side of me versus the curious side of me. I know she knows she shouldn't have done what she did, just like I shouldn't have done what I did. I certainly wouldn't have if I'd known she was that sensitive.

We ended up getting a storm yesterday after all. We could certainly use the rain.

I really hope this is connected to the vaccine, but yesterday, I spent the last half of my day absolutely freezing. But this has happened before I got vaccinated. I was freezing and my right hand got very cold. The thing is, an A1C of 6.0 shouldn't be enough to cause that feeling. My first thought was that my thyroid medication wasn't getting absorbed and I was becoming more hypo but then why did I feel warmer and have more energy for those few days? And why is my weight down?

What I do isn't the only thing that determines where my A1C ends up, and I realize that after cutting back on carbs and sugar, if it's still elevated the next time I have blood drawn, then I'm likely going to be forced into diabetes no matter what, since genetics also plays a part in it. It would be just my shit luck too.

[gaybabything]

Sooo I took the RAADS but… I didn't really know how to answer MOST of the questions so I don't think it's very accurate. :/ (not the tests fault- I am just not very good at… understanding myself? Also my memory of what I was like as a kid is TERRIBLE)

I had athsma as a kid so when I first was being diagnosed they did quite a few tests on me. (I think I even had to stay overnight because I went in after a bad athsma attack and they were worried about it happening again before I had the treatment for it) They put me on a strict diet so they could do some blood tests. But someone snuck me a candy without informing anyone and when they "knew" I hadn't eaten anything sugary and my blood sugar spiked- they thought I had diabetes and "treated" me for it. Well, it made my blood sugar go HAYWIRE and none of the doctors could figure out what happened so they had to emergency send me to the much bigger (and more competent) hospital a city over. I got to ride in an ambulance and they gave me a stuffed animal!'

Okay, I DO have a story but it will make this ask a bit long, so I am going to send it in a separate ask. It's one of the WILDEST coincidences!

How do you answer the questions on the RAADS??!?! I swear I don't know myself good enough to take that quiz :(((

Do you have any weird or unique traits such as being double jointed, heterochromia, or anything similar? (I don't XP)

Bestie, not knowing how to answer a lot of the questions and needing clarification for them is literally a symptom of autism :) (Not officially, I don't think. But many autistic people need a lot of clarification and have trouble answering these types of questions about themselves.) I am not a professional, but there's a chance you are on the autistic spectrum!

And the test was so hard for me too. I didn't understand majority of the questions so I had to go to reddit to find out what they were trying to ask me...

I do have slight hyper extension! My joints bend a little farther than normal, and I'm pretty flexible! It also makes the majority of my joints pop every single time I move them. (Fun fact, hyper extension tends to go hand in hand with neurodivergency!) And I have central heterochromia! My eyes are a grayish blue but around the irises are light brown rings! But it's not noticeable unless you go out of your way to lool at my eyes :)

Do you have any allergies? And do you have any that you thought were normal until someone told you it wasn't? (I have a citrus allergy, but I didn't know until last year. I just thought everyone got a numb/spiky mouth, heartburn, and started sweating when they ate oranges...)

If you could have any singular super power, what would it be?

[brettsey-two-tts]

Brettsey Prompts

+ Prompt +  Matt holding onto Sylvie’s hand while she’s in the hospital.

Before Sylvie could even think of opening her eyes, she immediately noticed the pressure on her index finger, the heaviness on her chest, and a familiar grip on her right hand. And then she heard an annoying ringing in her ear combined with a consistent beeping. She had heard the sounds many times before as she often did when she was on the job and had to admit people into Lakeshore or Med.

She was in the hospital.

But, why was she in the hospital?

The last thing she remembered was coming back from a call with Violet. Did something or someone hit their ambulance? No, that’s impossible. She remembers reversing the ambo onto the app floor. She was certain of it, because when she climbed out of the ambo, she remembered hearing Capp and Cruz teasingly ask Severide where he and Stella were going to go for their honeymoon. After that, nothing.

She fought against the heaviness in her eyelids but before she could open them, a small whimper escaped her lips.

Whatever was attached to her hand was alerted to the sound because she felt it twitch and then squeeze.

“Sylvie? Honey?”

The voice was somewhat muffled but when her eyes did finally flutter open, she was happy to see someone she trusted, loved, and found comfort in. Someone familiar.

“Matt?” she asked, still trying to wrap her head around her surroundings.

Yup, she was in the hospital. There was no mistake about it; she saw the EKG machine to her left, the small tv mounted in the corner playing reruns of HGTV (she wondered if that was Matt’s doing), the unique smell of antiseptic combined with artificial scents and soaps, and the pulse oximeter clamped onto her finger.

His worried frown and overly fearful wide eyes immediately met her confused gaze. When he saw her cornflower blue eyes meet his slate blue ones, it was like a wave of relief had washed over him. His shoulders sagged, the crease between his furrowed brows disappeared, and the tight grip on her hand loosened.

“Hey, Babe,” he murmured sweetly. “How are you feeling?”

Sylvie’s eyes continued to scan the room. “I’m… not sure.”

He visibly tensed. “Not sure?”

She blinked a couple times and clarified, “I’m not sure why I’m in the hospital. Was I in an accident or something?” No, that couldn’t be it either. She didn’t feel any pain. She could feel her legs and wiggle her toes, move her arms and feel the scratchy hospital blanket beneath her fingers.

He shook his head. “You collapsed on the app floor.”

Sylvie blinked a few times in disbelief. “Collapsed?”

“Violet rushed you to the hospital. Severide told me what happened when I landed at the airport. I took the taxi straight to Med and the doctors told me you had low blood sugar, dehydration– Violet said you guys were out a lot and she couldn’t remember if you ate anything.”

Sylvie grimaced as she remembered with a slight nod of her head. “I didn’t get to eat much during shift and this morning, and we had a weird call where we had to wait for CPD to give our statements.” She remembered forgetting to bring her water canteen that she usually kept in the cupholder. On top of it all, she had been trying to plan a few things for when Matt visited and also scrambled to grab a reservation at a really good restaurant Foster recommended to her. It all might’ve added to her fatigue.

Wait.

Matt.

He was here in Chicago. That’s right. He was visiting and was supposed to land and take a taxi to her apartment.

She whipped her head at the remembrance. “How long have I been out?” she asked. Matt gave her a worried frown when she tried to sit up.

“You were in and out on the way to Med. When Violet brought you here, you slept for a good hour before I got here. It’s been about three hours total maybe.” He held onto her hand a little tighter in some panic when he saw her start to climb out of the hospital bed. “What are you doing?”

“I’m going to ask to get discharged,” she replied simply, but he kept her from moving any more than she should.

“Then I'll go find a doctor so he can reevaluate you,” he replied calmly. He noticed how uncomfortable she looked and how much her brows started to knit together. “Sylvie?”

She confessed her irritation, “I just.. I had all these things planned for your visit. We’re supposed to be half-way to Waterfall Glen right now. And I was going to pack us a lunch to eat there and relax so we could soak up all the time we have together.”

Matt looked puzzled as he jokingly asked, “Why do you make it sound like we’re never going to see each other again?”

He was right; she did sound a little out of sorts. “You don’t visit often and when you do, something always goes wrong. Last time, shift ran late and you had to take a taxi to the firehouse instead of my place. You waited an hour and a half for me to return. Before that, your plane was delayed for five hours. And before that, I caught a cold and you had to take care of me, which was probably not at all what you anticipated when you thought of visiting in the first place. I don’t want to waste your time.”

He sat back down on the chair beside her and held her hand. He laced their fingers together and softly placed his other hand on top of hers. His thumb rubbed soothing circles into the back of hers as he spoke.

“Honey,” he began. He sounded like he was more disappointed that she thought such things affected him in any way. He loved spending time with her, even if it involved cuddling with her in her bed surrounded by used tissues while she fought off a coughing fit. “Setbacks happen. Flight delays, viruses, and obligations to your job - they all happen, and I don’t blame you for any of it. Sure, it sucks when plans don’t go the way you want them to, but that doesn’t mean I regret any of it.”

He saw her disappointment start to dissolve as her conflicted expression softened.

“You don’t?”

“Absolutely not. Any time together is time well spent in my book, even if that means having to endure a screaming baby on the plane for six hours to make it happen.” He laughed at the remembrance of his obvious grumpiness after he landed. His eyes lit up as he finished, “It is all worth it. You’re worth it.” She bashfully looked away at his endearing honesty and felt his lips against the back of her hand. Her heart practically melted at the sweet gesture.

If it were anyone else, maybe even Harrison, she wouldn’t have heard those words. Harrison would’ve made her feel bad for getting sick in the first place and would’ve put salt in the wound by bringing it up for weeks. But, not Matt. Matt was so sweet, selfless, kindhearted, and loving. He knew she had a habit of beating herself up for things out of her control. He never blamed her or even thought of blaming her and instead lifted her spirits in as many ways as possible. How in the world was he her boyfriend? What did she do to deserve him?

“I’m going to go get the doctor and we’re going to get you out of here. And then we’ll get some lunch at your favorite cafe that has all those different kinds of salads you love so much. Sound good?” Matt asked cheerfully, trying to shift her mood a little.

That’s what she both loved and missed about him; she loved his ability to pick up on her little cues that alluded to how she was feeling and she missed how he knew exactly what to say to her to help her feel better.

“That sounds wonderful, Matt.” She was definitely giving him some intense hearteyes. “Thank you.”

“Of course,” he replied. He got up from his seat and leaned over to press a lingering kiss to her forehead. “I love you,” he whispered.

She leaned into him as she murmured, “I love you, too.” As soon as he pulled away, he caught her gaze and leaned in to press a chaste kiss to her lips. It was both in greeting and in thankfulness; a greeting that was long overdue and a thanks that she was going to be okay.

[babymetaldoll]

So happy together (Spencer Reid / Reader)

Summary: Spencer bumps into an old annoying classmate, who brags about his perfect family, and Reader decides to pretend to be Spencer’s wife to shut him up.   

Warnings: As fluffy as you can get 

Word count: 2,3K

Part II

Masterlist 

. 

It wasn’t strange that Spencer and (Y/N) spent their free time together when they weren’t on a case. Their job at the BAU left them just a few weekends off, and though they were all day on each other’s faces at work, they loved going out whenever the opportunity arose. 

It might have been related to the fact they were best friends. 

Also to the fact they were in love, but neither of them had still said a word about it. 

Years had passed. Years. Morgan and Penelope were going nuts waiting for them to confess their feelings, but though they had literally pushed them together - once they were “accidentally” locked in a supply closet of the BAU for two hours- nothing had happened yet. 

Even Hotch was annoyed. He was happy Spencer had someone he loved around him, but all Aaron wanted to tell him was: 

- “You have to act on your feelings before it’s too late, ‘cos you never know what will happen tomorrow, not just in this job, but in life. Take what makes you happy and keep it close”. 

Of course, the day he tried to talk to Reid, all Hotch managed to say was: “Tell (Y/N) wheels up in thirty” and that was it, but he was planning on giving the kid a speech about love, as soon as he got a chance. 

Then again, when did he have time to do anything besides work? 

It was Saturday, and Spencer was taking a calm walk in a park with (Y/N). She had promised Mrs. Sanders from 307B she was going to take Lizzy - her five years old corgi - out to play for a while, ‘cos it was making the old woman insane. Mrs. Sanders was the only neighbor (Y/N) actually talked to…. mostly ‘cos she was never long enough in her house to meet the rest of them. (Y/N) took her dog for walks as often as she could, and the old lady always baked her brownies and cookies for her “and her boyfriend”

- “Your boyfriend is too skinny, take him these and tell him you made them for him, men love when a woman cooks for them”- the old lady smiled and gave (Y/N) a tray with freshly made cookies- “And tell him to cut his hair, he looks scruffy”.

(Y/N) never told her otherwise, a part of her loved the idea of Spencer being her boyfriend…. and besides, it would be rude to break an old woman’s heart. Right? 

- “Do you want an ice cream?”- Reid asked her and took her from her thoughts. 

- “Yes! I need sugar ‘cos I’m so tired I’m gonna fall asleep standing here”- Lizzy barked at them and left her ball on the ground- “You on the other hand, never get tired, do you?”- the young woman threw the ball.

- “Go fetch, baby!!”

Spencer walked to the ice cream truck and got her a chocolate chip cookie dough cone - he didn’t even need to ask- and a mint chocolate chip for himself. He stared at her playing with Lizzy and for a second, he imagined she was actually his girlfriend, and they were spending their day off together, walking their dog, eating ice cream, holding hands. It was perfect in his mind. 

- “Here”- he gave her her cone and smiled. (Y/N) was about to thank him when a stranger’s voice stopped her. 

- “Spencer!! long time no see! how are you?”- a man stood next to them, he was maybe five years older than them, tall, good looking, he was carrying a little girl in his arms, and holding a woman’s hand tight. She was pregnant and smiling happily. It was the portrait of a perfect family. 

- “Carl, hey, hello, how are you?”- Reid was surprised to see him, it had been years since he had seen his old classmate, and he could have lived a long happy life if he hadn’t seen him again. 

Carl wasn’t really nice. He wasn’t mean, or a bully, or anything like that. He was just… an asshole sometimes. He was always bragging about everything he had: grades, cars, girls, anything you might think of. Spencer always thought it was because he needed to be validated over and over again as an alfa male, which wasn’t really his problem. But still, after hearing him for years when he was younger, Reid had enough of him. 

- “It’s so weird to find you here, I thought you would still have your nose buried in books like you always did on weekends!”- Carl laughed at his own joke, and Reid just nodded, with an awkward smile. 

- “No, I… sometimes I go out now”- that was all he managed to say

- “This is my wife, Andrea, and our little angel, Anna, she is three… and Carl Jr is on his way”

- “Nice to meet you”- Spencer waved and couldn’t even introduce (Y/N), ‘cos Carl continued talking. 

- “Can you believe I got married? I always said I was never going to settle down and here I am! with a happy family! you should come and visit us! We just bought this fantastic house outside town, with a big yard and lots of space for the kids to run and play!”

(Y/N) stared at Carl and bit her tongue. She had heard about him a lot in the last few years. Spencer told her all about the classmate who kept telling him about the dates he had with the girls he wanted to ask out. And all the fun he had at the parties he wasn’t invited to. And how he managed to always make him feel smaller, though he didn’t actually mean to. Sometimes people can’t help being assholes. 

- “And who is your friend?”- the assumption (Y/N) was his friend and not his girlfriend (although it was actually accurate, that was another problem) made Reid’s blood boil. Why couldn’t he have a pretty girlfriend too? 

- “Hi! I’m (Y/N), Spencer’s wife”- she waved and smiled- “Sorry I can’t shake your hand”- she added and showed them the dog toy she was holding, and the ice cream cone.

- “Come here Lizzy! come here!”- the dog sat next to her and (Y/N) pet her sweetly. 

- “Wife! man! I never thought you had it in you”- Carl didn’t realize he was an ass, he didn’t mean to, but that didn’t stop him.  

Spencer just smiled, and in what seemed to be the boldest move he had ever made, he wrapped an arm around (Y/N)’s waist and moved her a little closer to him. 

- “Yes, we’ve been married for two years already”- she added, resting her head against his arm, feeling her stomach tighten. Spencer’s perfume was all around her, and she loved it. Besides, the fact he was now holding her close was killing her. Literally, she could feel she was about to have a heart attack, and it was completely worth it. It took her a few seconds to realize her ice cream was melting in her hands. 

- “Shit!”- she jumped and moved from her “husband” to clean herself. 

- “Here”- Carl’s wife handed her some baby wipes and looked at her hands for a second- “Did you lose your ring?”- shit, Andrea was nosy and annoying, just like her hubby.

- “I usually won’t wear it playing with the dog, or at work”- lies came out of (Y/N)’s lips as easy as breathing- “You know… we are both FBI, and you don’t know when someone might actually take advantage of any kind of information they have about you”

- “FBI? you?”- Spencer looked at Carl and sighed. Right, he wasn’t done teasing him yet. 

- “Yes, I’ve been working at the BAU for the last couple of years, profiling serial killers”- Reid made it sound like it wasn’t a big deal, and (Y/N) decided it was time to brag a little. 

- “Honey, don’t be so modest, you are the best profiler, we are the only team with a Doctor in Mathematics, Chemistry, and Engineering”- and Reid blushed- “Besides, you joined the FBI when you were 22 years old”- (Y/N) smiled and looked at Carl- “Did you know he is the youngest SSA the bureau had ever have? there was no psychological exam or test the FBI could put in front of him he could not ace inside of an hour”  

Carl looked at Reid and nodded, trying to find something to say. 

- “That’s great, I’ve got my own law firm by the way, in case you ever get in trouble”- he joked and looked at (Y/N)- “Or in case you want to divorce him ‘cos he ignores you over books”

- “I could never! did you know he has saved around 352 lives in the last two years? he actually got the FBI Medal for Meritorious Achievement a few months ago… I am so proud”- (Y/N) leaned in and kissed Spencer’s cheek. He looked at her blushing and just smiled. 

- “You look adorable”- Andrea finally said- “It’s like you just started dating!” 

- “Well, we have to go”- Carl didn’t manage being overshadowed very well- “It was very nice to see you, Spencer” 

- “Same! take care, nice to meet you, Andrea”- Reid waved and smiled. (Y/N) did the same and kept eating her ice cream. 

- “I hate him”- she whispered as soon as they were far enough not to listen- “I’m so glad we didn’t invite them to our wedding”- Reid laughed and shook his head

- “You didn’t have to do that”

- “Nah, I wanted to”- she really did- “He was being a jerk, just like you told me he was” 

- “He doesn’t mean to… I think” 

- “Well, he got what he deserved”- (Y/N) felt Spencer’s eyes on her, looking at her in adoration. 

- “Thank you, buttercup”- and she giggled

- “You are very welcome, honey bunny…”- and the silence seemed to last for ages until Lizzy started barking. 

(Y/N) smiled and looked away from him, knowing she was blushing. She really loved that nickname, and he didn’t call her by it as often as she would like. She grabbed the dog toy from the ground and threw it to Lizzy, who ran immediately.

- “Mrs. Sanders made you cookies”- she said after a few minutes- “But she said I had to tell you I baked them for you, ‘cos that what’s girlfriend’s do to get men’s hearts”- Reid’s cheeks were still red, and those words didn’t make it better- “But considering we are already married, I guess I don’t have to do that anymore”. 

They both laughed and then, stayed quiet again. Reid could hear Rossi’s voice yelling in the back of his head “Ask the girl out, for crying out loud”, but he couldn’t even open his mouth, petrified. 

(Y/N) finished her ice cream, watching Lizzy playing with other dogs, and sighed. They were standing side by side, both looking ahead. 

- “We should head back”

- “Doyouwannagooutwithme?”

The slur of words was so fast, not even Spencer understood what he had just said. But (Y/N) did. She stood next to him feeling her knees shaking, as well as her hands. It had happened. It had finally happened. In her head, she was screaming “YES, OF COURSE I WANT TO”, but her lips weren’t moving, and Reid was starting to panic. Maybe Morgan was wrong, and (Y/N) did like him that way. Maybe he had just ruined the best friendship he had ever had. Shit! what had he done. 

- “I mean, I understand if you…”- but she didn’t let him finish 

- “Yes, I do”- that was really all she could process. And he didn’t know what to say next. There was no random fact to kill the silence, they would always have a lot to talk about, but that time they were speechless. 

- “Tomorrow?”- he managed to whisper

- “Ok”- she nodded as the two of them kept looking at Lizzy 

 - “I’ll pick you up for dinner”- Spencer’s voice was so soft he was scared it was going to shake and embarrass him  (he was already embarrassed, but he didn’t want to make it worst). 

- “Sounds good”- (Y/N) slowly turned her head and looked at him, nearly holding her breath. Her best friend finally asked her out. The best friend she had been in love with for years had just asked her out on a date. And all she managed to say was: 

- “So… do you want a cookie?”

- “Sure…”- he nodded and smiled. (Y/N) called Lizzy and put on her leash. Gave Spencer the paper bag with homemade cookies she carried in her purse and smiled.

.

- “Did you know Christmas cookies date back to Medieval Europe?”- and there it was, Spencer’s random fact of the day, just on time to kill the silence when they were about to reach (Y/N)’s apartment. 

- “Really?”

- “Yeah, the traditional Christmas flavors, like cinnamon, nutmeg, and ginger, became very popular, and those are exactly the same spices medieval cooks would have used in their cookies ages ago”

- “I love Christmas cookies”

- “I know”- he smiled and looked at her- You bake them all year long 

- “I can’t help it, they are too good”- she giggled and stood outside her building door. They just stared and smiled, Lizzy trying to get (Y/N)’s attention rubbing her head against her leg. 

- “I’ll see you tomorrow then”- Spencer blushed at the hint of their date and (Y/N) nodded

- “See you tomorrow”- and neither of them moved. Lizzy barked again and forced (Y/N) to wave and open the door. Spencer just stood there for a second, staring at the empty space in front of him where (Y/N) was standing a few seconds ago, and suddenly, it all sank in.

- “What the fuck did I just do?” 

[whispersbelongingbird]

Yunoleo Headcanons

I tried to stop myself, I really did

Yuno and Leo like to spend their evenings together and it always ends with Leo fallen asleep in Yuno's lap

Leo really wanted to try on Yuno's golden dawn robe and after he did Leo didn't take it off for an hour (Yuno took it from him by force)

Yuno just loves to surprise Leo with little small gifts, seeing the smile on his face always make Yuno happy.

Leo used Yunos last name as a joke to Asta, but Asta being the dummy he is, told father Orsi that Yuno was married. Yuno had to send a letter explaining everything.

Once there was a bat hanging onto the curtain in Yuno's room. Leo was Holding onto Yuno the whole time while he tried to grab it and put it out the window

When Leo and Yuno told Fuegoleon and Mereoleona about their relationship, of course they both approved of it, but Yuno ended up getting threatened. 'Do anything and I mean anything that upsets my younger brother then I'll make sure you never see daylight again' still haunts him till this day

After being pushed by Mimosa Leopold confessed to Yuno, when he said yes Leo looked like he had just had a bucket of blood thrown onto him

Yuno does get jealous, but not often. Leo doesn't that much but when him, Yuno and Asta are hanging out someone always has to say how good of a couple Yuno and Asta would be. And the worsts part is that they say it in front of Leo

Leo leaves right after someone says it, with Yuno following while Asta is trying to explain how Leo and Yuno are together

The first time it happened Leo went to the vermillion estate and locked himself in his room. This siblings noticed and they also noticed Yuno at his door, Mereoleona being Mereoleona went ahead and started to accuse Yuno. Things ended well though..

When it rains Yuno always holds the umbrella when they are together since he is taller.

Leo once mixed the salt and sugar to pull a prank on Yuno, Yuno ignored him for 2 days, he had to stop because Leo said he would tell his sister (Leo never pulled a prank again)

Leo is definitely the more affectionate once, just loves hugs, cuddles, handing holding just anything to do with Yuno.

They always have silly little argument together but once their argument got a little heated and they both got really upset, Leo went to the golden dawn early in the morning to apologise. Yuno felt bad because Leo looked tired so he let him rest in his bed.

Leo once sprained his ankle from doing something stupid so Yuno carried him bridal style it was nice but Leo was really flustered and embarrassed

For nicknames Leo will call Yuno Yun because he always get his attention by using a nickname. For Leopold, he would like for Yuno to use a nickname for him but he never does. Well except from the classic 'Leo'. But then again everyone calls him that.

Yuno loves to hold Leo's hand whenever he can Leo is really ticklish like you could just touch his next he will start letting out soft giggles

.Leo will ask the most random and weird questions at night time and Yuno is just too tired to keep up with him so he just Buries Leo's head in his chest telling him to sleep.

Leo can not lie, like this guy will just start shaking and sweating avoiding eye contact and it's a big disadvantage for him but not for Yuno because Leo tends to hide whenever he is feeling down so Yuno is always able to tell and comfort him.

Leo is not a morning person he is more of a night owl, however Yuno is the early bird.

Leo literally loves cuddles like so much, On his birthday he got 3 hours of cuddles from Yuno and they fell asleep together cuddling eachother.

Leo gets frequent nightmares and when he does he is more down during the day and Yuno is able to tell by now when he has had one and always sits down with Leo letting him explain to Yuno about what happened

Leo has very bad astraphobia and whenever there is a storm Yuno does everything in his power to be right next to him. One time Yuno couldn't go because the storm was really bad and his squad wouldn't allow him to go so Leo had to deal with it alone and it did not go well at all. In the morning Yuno made his way to the vermillion estate and stayed in Leo's room the whole time with him because the poor boy was still in shock

They don't have the biggest height difference but there still is one. Yuno doesn't boast about it to much but whenever someone mentions the word short Yuno looks at Leo and smirks while Leopold is just annoyed.

Leo randomly just jumps into Yunos arms at any point of the day, it happens a lot when he is jealous.

Leo tried to scare Yuno for about a week but it never worked so he gave up.

Days off together are the best things ever, laying down together blabbering, ranting, hugging, cuddling, kissing, tickling. It's considered a big reward to them both.

Leo loves it when Yuno would just whisper loving things into his ears before going to sleep.

Leo is always staring a Yuno whenever he isn't looking. Yuno caught him once and just started back and smiled at Leo.

Asta, Yuno and Leopold had a pillow fight once's and Asta pushed Leo onto Yuno and it ended up stopping the whole thing (it was Asta's plan as he knew the two would get caught up in each other meaning he will win)

This is unhealthy

[vivianweasley]

Winking and Rolling Eyes (Fred Weasley X Reader)

Summary: You and the Weasley twins are best friends but you and Fred just couldn’t stop bickering. It’s all fun and games until you see him flirting with other girls. Why can’t he just stop being so mean to you and maybe finally see you as a potential girlfriend? Friends to lover

Pairing: Fred Weasley X Fem!Reader

Warnings: Fred being mean? a little bit of angst, blood (Umbridge’s quill), mention of food

Word count: 3.5k

A/N: For some reasons, I always pictured Fred to be the kind of guy who would be mean to the girl he likes just to get her attention lol. Tell me what you guys think about this!

Please do NOT repost my work or translate it on another site without permission! Thank you! Reblogs and comments are always welcome:)

1995

Your head was always filled with weird random questions. For example right now, you were sitting in the Great Hall contemplating over why do some people tease and taunt the person they love, instead of actually showing their affection like a normal human being. What’s the reason behind this kind of action? And more importantly, why are you guilty of this too?

But what made you more confused was, when exactly did Fred and George become so bloody popular??

They were walking pass a group of Gryffindor girls now. The girls were blushing and some were even fixing their hair. “Hi Fred! Hi George!” 

“Hi girls!” George replied with a cheeky grin and Fred even winked at them.

You couldn’t help but rolled your eyes. You and the Weasley twins were best friends since the first year, but this year they became so popular, attracting many girls’ attention. You weren’t surprised. They were great beaters and their pranks were epic. Not to mention how bloody attractive they were. Of course they were going to attract people’s attention. Unlike you, who were just an ordinary girl, sitting in the corner and always daydreaming.

“What are you thinking about?” George’s voice pulled you back to reality.

“Y/N you know, if you keep rolling your eyes like that, one day they might never roll back.” Fred opened his eyes wide, looking like he was trying to scare a kid with a ghost story.

Yet you rolled your eyes again, “if you keep winking, one day your eyelids might fall off.”

“Y/N that doesn’t make any sense.”

“Like you ever made any sense!”

“We’re going to Hogsmeade. Do you wanna come?” George broke off your childish bickering.

“Sure!” You just ran out of chocolate so it was a perfect chance for you to go to Honeydukes and restock.

“Ugh I don’t wanna go with this woman. She rolls her eyes way too much.”

“Just shut up!”

You have no idea what Honeydukes was thinking. Why would they put their products on such a high shelf. Apparently, the girl next to you were having the same concerns. She was standing on tip-toe, struggling to reach high, but she failed to even touch that bag of sugar quills.

But someone next to her reached out and grabbed that bag of sugar quills for her.

“Your sugar quill.” Fred bent over a little and handed that girl her sugar quills in a really dramatic way.

That girl was blushing now, “Thanks!”

“Oi Fred, while you’re at it, I want one too.” you asked. It should be easy, since he was still standing beside it.

“Help yourself, shorty.” But he smiled at you mischievously and just walked away.

Watching him disappearing in the crowd, you rolled your eyes and reached for your wand, “Accio!”

And things like that kept on happening.

Fred and George were banned from partnering in potion class, since students’ cauldrons tend to explode mysteriously whenever the twins were partners. You and Fred were also banned from partnering, because your cauldron also tend to explode whenever the two of you were partners.

So today, Fred was partnering with a Hufflepuff girl in potion class and you were sitting behind them. You swore to Merlin that Fred was flirting with that girl the entire class period. 

That you endured, but what really got on your nerves was when you heard him saying, “Don’t worry, I’ll keep an eye on the fire, or else the cauldron will explode just like Y/N’s.”

You felt like all the blood in your body has suddenly rushed into your head due to anger. Last time when you asked him to keep an eye on the fire so you could read the instructions, he replied, “Can’t you do it yourself?” You got mad at him and didn’t pay attention when the fire was growing tall, causing your cauldron to explode.

Now you felt like your temper has exploded, and unfortunately, your cauldron exploded with it.

“Miss (Y/L/N), does your cauldron have a problem or do you have a problem?” you heard Snape’s cold monotone.

“I’m sorry professor.”

You glared at Fred. He was trying so hard to hold back his laughter that his face was flushed. You looked at him and you looked at your now messy table, you couldn’t help but rolled your eyes. Merlin, maybe he was right. Maybe you did roll your eyes way too often.

------------------------------------------------------------------------

Then strange things started to happen. Many girls started to wave at you too. And you soon realized the reason behind this.

One day, a Ravenclaw girl came to you. It looked like she was hesitant but she still managed to get the question out, “Are you...are you Fred or George’s girlfriend?

“What? No!” You were just confused. Why would she assume that? Has she seen how Fred treated you? Who would treat their girlfriend like that?

“Great!” She let out a sigh of relief and then handed you a small box, “Could you please give this to Fred for me? Thanks!”

“Sure?” She ran away after you took the box, leaving you there with your feet glued to the floor and having no idea how to feel about this.

Curiosity was urging you to open that box and see what’s inside, but your conscience stopped you. Judging by her blush and the pink wrapping, it was probably a love letter or chocolate or something of that sort.

You didn’t know why, but you suddenly didn’t want to help her anymore. A part of you even urged you to throw the box away, but at the end you still delivered the box to Fred.

“Blimey Y/N, didn’t know you fancy me!” He took the box and gasped dramatically.

“No idiot, this is from another girl.” You slapped him on his arm, “I sort of just became her wing-woman.” 

“Aww Y/N, don’t feel discouraged. If you ever need a wingman, George can help you with that!”

“What about you?”

He opened his mouth but no words came out yet. You were sure that he was probably going to tease you again, but you just didn’t have the energy to do this with him today. So before he could say anything, you spoke first, “Never mind, George is probably more reliable anyways.” And you left.

“Where are you going?” You heard him yelling from behind.

“My bed! It’s tired being a wing-woman.”

------------------------------------------------------------------------

Then life went back to normal. You would still hangout with the twins and help them with new prank ideas. You and Fred were still constantly bickering whenever you two have the chance. It was just that more and more girls came to you asking for help to deliver gifts to the twins. Even a Beauxbatons girl came to you once. Guess everyone was just trying to find a perfect date for the upcoming dance.

After deciding to stay as far away as possible from Fred during potion class, you actually became friends with a Gryffindor boy. His name was Finley Laurent. He was tall and you could always see a smirk on his lips. He was also really funny and you two hit it off right away.

You two went from studying in the library together, to going on Hogsmeade dates. Before the Yule ball, he asked you to be his date and you agreed to it happily.

The Yule ball soon arrived. You did your makeup and hair and you put on the dress your mother sent you. You were so excited about this, in fact you even went downstairs early to wait for your date.

But instead of Finley, you ran into the twins first.

“Blimey Y/N, I should’ve asked you to the dance! Didn’t know you could look this...tolerable!” Fred exclaimed teasingly.

You rolled your eyes, “Thank you for your ‘kind compliment’, but I already have a date!”

“Y/N! Are you coming with us?” You heard Angelina’s voice.

“No, Y/N already has a date. She doesn’t want to hangout with us anymore.” Fred said bitterly, didn’t give you the chance to talk, “Let’s go!”

The twins walked away with Angelina and Lee was waiting for them at the entrance. You realized that they were going as a group. You were suddenly regretting your choice now. It would be so fun going with them. 

Wait, what were you thinking? Did you want to hear Fred making fun of your dress or the way you dance for the entire night? You were sure that going with Finley would be just as fun.

You waited at the entrance for at least twenty minutes. It looked like everyone who was attending the ball has already entered the ball room. You finally decided to walk into the ball room alone. Did Finley bail on you? Was he sick? You had to admit that you were slightly annoyed but you were still worried about him.

But as soon as you saw the truth, you’d rather know that he was sick.

He was dancing with another girl. They were dancing and laughing together and the picture looked so great. So great that it suddenly seemed like you were the one who’s barging in now.

You could feel all of the blood in your body boiling as you walked over to him. “Care to explain?” You asked as politely as you could.

“Y/N...” He was surprised to see you suddenly appearing in front of him, but the words he was about to say sounded pretty well-prepared, “I’m sorry, Y/N. This is my girlfriend. We were in a fight before, but we got back together right before the Yule ball. I didn’t know things would turn out this way...”

“So am I just a backup plan?” Your brain still wasn’t fully able to process the situation right now that you felt almost like a bystander. You didn’t know what to think and you didn’t know what to do.

It was clear that he didn’t know how to face this situation either. Even the girl next to him was feeling ashamed of him. She just lowered her head and didn’t look at any of you.

“Oh baby you are here!” Suddenly, you heard a familiar voice. You turned your head stiffly to look at the source of the voice. Tall, redheaded, freckles, deep brown eyes. Your brain slowly began to piece together the name of this person, Fred Weasley.

He held your hand and he looked like he was sorry, in his own dramatic way. “Baby, I’m so sorry! It’s all my fault! I should’ve never argued with you! Will you please forgive me?”

You squinted your eyes and stared at Fred all confused. 

He squeezed your hand lightly, hinting you to just follow his lead.

“What’s going on here?” Finley finally managed to say something.

Fred suddenly let go of your hand and his left hand snaked around your waist to pull you closer to him, “It’s my fault to even let you have the chance to invite my girlfriend to the dance, but mate, haven’t you realized yet?”

“Realized what?”

“No offense, but can’t you see that you’re just a less-handsome substitute for me?”

Now it was Finley’s turn to be so angry that he couldn’t speak anymore, but Fred was right about one thing. You finally realized why Finley felt familiar to you. 

Maybe he was indeed a less-handsome version of Fred. They were both tall. They both have freckles. Merlin, even both of their names start with the letter “F”. But Finley’s smile was nothing compared to Fred’s. Fred’s smile was always so confident and cheerful. Even though you probably would never tell him, but his smile would always light up your day and make you feel just a little bit more hopeful on a bad day. 

“Let’s go!” Fred grabbed your hand and you two ran away before Finley exploded.

You two eventually went to the Gryffindor common room because Fred had a bucket of ice cream hidden in his dorm. The sweetness of ice cream healed your wounded pride and calmed your temper.

“Thanks, for having my back today.”

“Merlin, Y/N! Didn’t know you knew the word ‘thanks’.”

You slapped him on his arm and he acted like he was suffering a mortal wound.

“It was nothing. Anything for my best mate!”

“Best mate my arse!”

You couldn’t sleep that night. What was keeping you awake wasn’t the wrong you’ve suffered tonight, but the sound of Fred calling you his girlfriend.

You knew he was just saying that to get on Finley’s nerves and you felt ridiculous that this scene was playing on repeat in your mind. You just couldn’t ignore the butterflies in your stomach and the warm fuzzy feeling rising up in your heart, spreading through your whole body.

It was terrible, but you found yourself becoming the girls that you would usually roll your eyes at. You were falling for Fred Weasley. Or you’ve already fell for him a long time ago, but you’ve only realized it today.

But what’s even worse was that you knew you would never have a chance with him. Merlin! Just think about how he treated you. He was always so mean to you and he was treating you like you were just one of his friends, not a potential girlfriend. You just felt hopeless.

So you’ve decided. You have to kill your feelings for him before it grows.

Or at least, before he found out.

1996

Under Umbridge’s control, everyone’s life was just miserable. Especially the twins who were natural trouble makers. You have tried to persuade them to lay low during a time like this, but they thought a time like this was exactly when people needed their products and laughters in their lives.

You joined Dumbledore’s Army with Fred and George. In Dumbledore’s Army, you met Ernest Macmillan, a Hufflepuff boy. He was a nice guy and you two became friends immediately. Blonde hair, blue eyes, and a soft personality, nothing like Fred Weasley. Great, you thought that was a good sign.

Fred was still the same. He would still tease you when he saw you hanging out with Ernie.

“Y/N, what are you trying to do to that poor boy!” or “Ernie, you gotta be careful. This woman’s cauldron would always explode mysteriously. Maybe one day you will explode too!”

You would always roll your eyes at him when you heard him saying something like that. You were both graduating this year. How could he still be this immature?

Unfortunately, Umbridge still found out about Dumbledore’s Army and everyone in the army suffered from that torturing quill.

After finally leaving her office, you sat on the bench in the hallway. You stared at your bloodied hand that read “I must not disobey”, tears started to well up in your eyes.

Ernie was sitting next to you, “Are you alright?”

You saw the same scar on his hand and you just couldn’t hold your tears anymore. You started crying. When will days like this finally end?

He wrapped his arms around your shoulders and held up your wounded hand. He tried to alleviate your pain by gently blowing air on it. “The pain will stop in a minute. I promise you.”

You closed your eyes and rested your head on Ernie’s shoulder without realizing that not far from here, Fred was staring at your direction.

So you didn’t need him right now. That’s perfectly fine, he thought. He just turned around and left, with his right hand covering up his wounded left hand. But what if he needed you?

A few days later before curfew, Fred came to you and brought you to a deserted hallway. You were still wondering what he was trying to do, but he waved his wand and a few fireflies appeared and started flying around you.

The light in the hallway was dim, but the fireflies were lighting up your face. It felt like the stars have suddenly came down from the starry night sky to dance around you. It was cliche to say, but you felt like you were in a fairy tale.

“When did you learn to do this? It’s brilliant!” It was rare that you wanted to compliment him without making fun of him first.

“Y/N, I fancy you.”

Your heart probably skipped a beat, maybe more than one beat. Was this what you were always dreaming of?

But your smile soon froze on your face. He’s Fred Weasley for Merlin’s sake! The guy who was probably joking about 80% of everything he ever said.

So was this just another prank? You were pretty sure you saw him flirting with another girl yesterday and how can you forget the way he always treated you! You thought the answer was pretty clear.

“Hahaha,” you laughed sarcastically, “Very funny Fred, but I’m not that stupid. I know you too well.”

“What?” He was still trying to pretend like he was confused.

“I bet George is hiding somewhere now, waiting to see my reaction. Where is he?” You walked pass Fred and began to search for George.

But you heard him said, “So am I only a joke to you?”

“What?” Now you were confused.

“Never mind, just forget I said anything tonight.” And he just walked away.

Not long after Fred’s gone, George showed up just as you expected. But he looked so disappointed with his brows furrowed.

The air between you two were making you panic, but you still managed to sound indifferent, “What’s wrong with Fred? So his prank didn’t work. What’s the big deal?”

“Y/N, he wasn’t joking.”

“So you are also part of this prank? Please, I saw him flirting with some other girl yesterday. I’m not that stupid.”

“He only did that because you were around. He just thought that you look cute when you are mad at him. It’s childish I know. I told him that you might misunderstand it, but you know him, he’s just like that. The more he likes you, the more he’s gonna make fun of you.” George sounded so serious, “You should know. You two are just the same.”

“I...” you were speechless, George’s words blew up in your mind like someone has casted reducto there.

“Don’t try to deny it. You are too obvious. You are both too obvious.” George continued, “I don’t know why he’s only telling you this now. Maybe because he panicked after seeing you with Ernie. Maybe because we are going to leave Hogwarts soon.”

“What?? What do you mean by you are leaving Hogwarts???” You couldn’t keep your cool anymore. You were all already graduating this year. What were they thinking?

“Fred was going to tell you tonight. We both thought our future lay outside the world of academic achievement. And now with Umbridge in charge, we just can’t stay here anymore. Not even for a few months.”

You immediately grabbed him by his arm and pulled him to run towards the Gryffindor common room. You still couldn’t quite process what was going on. Your head was a mess and your heart was beating like crazy, but there was only one thing you were clear about.

“Where are you going!”

“I need to find him!”

You two managed to get into the Gryffindor common room before curfew. Fred was standing there, looking surprised that you showed up with George.

You weren’t someone who liked to share too much about your private life, but you just couldn’t see anyone else in the room anymore now. There was only one person in your eyes and one person on your mind. You walked straight to Fred and just blurted out, “I fancy you!”

“What?”

You rolled your eyes. And now he’s playing dumb? You grabbed his collar and  pulled him down, smashing your lips together. Everyone in the common room was cheering now.

You finally let go of him and he grinned, “Are you trying to prank me?”

“Sure, if you say so.”

“Alright,” he smirked, “I dare you to prank me everyday.”

“Challenge accepted.” You smiled, as he pulled you into another breathless kiss.

2000

“FRED WEASLEY!” You knew shouting wasn’t right, the entire Diagon Alley probably heard you now. But your brain went blank when you saw the empty cake box.

You spent the entire afternoon yesterday trying to bake a cake for Molly’s birthday today, but the cake disappeared now. There was only an empty cake box with some cake crumbs left, telling you that the cake wasn’t just a product of your imagination. You knew George would probably ask you about it when he saw a random cake. But Fred’s different, so you could easily pinpoint the suspect now.

You didn’t have the time to bake another cake. You were leaving in five minutes and you’ve already changed into your dress.

“What happened!” Fred walked out of the room, still fixing his tie and looking all innocent.

You waved the empty cake box at him.

“Oh...” he laughed awkwardly, possibly trying to act all cute to make you forgive him.

“FRED WEASLEY, what is you problem!”

“Merlin, we are gonna be so late!” He grabbed your hand and apparated you two into the Burrows before you could say anything else.

“Oh dear, you two are here!” Molly jumped when you two suddenly appeared, but she was also very happy to see you. “Y/N dear, what’s that in your hand?” She pointed at the empty cake box that was still in your hand.

“Oh...I baked you a cake yesterday for your birthday, but Fred ate it all.”

Fred grinned at Molly, “But I can assure you that the cake was delicious! This woman’s cauldron may explode, but her cake was brilliant!”

You couldn’t help but rolled your eyes.

He pulled you closer by your waist and winked at you, “Love, if you keep rolling your eyes this often, maybe one day they might never roll back.”

“If you keep winking this often, maybe one day your eyelids might fall off.”

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