#but instead it was just. a very chill experience. All Things Considered

[viiridiangreen]

we had a fucking 'blood moon' lunar eclipse *and* an earthquake the night before the Tool show btw

[indigochromatic]

Some Basic Advice About EMDR for Systems

(drawing on our own experiences, reading about it, and comparing notes with our therapist)

This is mainly aimed at systems who are considering doing EMDR or planning on it, but want to know what the process is like and what to look out for, with some personal experiences sprinkled in.

Under the cut, because I talk a lot:

General Concept

I think the big picture in our experience is that EMDR is/was like…an intensifier for the kind of headspace/internal system interaction processing work that a lot of systems do naturally, at least a little, especially if they have decent internal communication. This has both upsides and downsides/areas to be cautious about.

A lot of EMDR pre-work (often called “resourcing”) is about making sure you have a good toolbox of “mental tricks/techniques” to be able to handle unexpected intense emotions, feelings, and/or imagery etc that often comes up when you get into trying to work with traumatic stuff. This is in my opinion very important, and something your therapist should take at least a few sessions to talk with you about even if you already have good tools for it already, just to make sure they know your strategies and you’re all on the same page. Also super common and normal to spend some time developing extra ones if needed—stuff like “the box” for temporarily containing crisis emotions when needed, having a mental “safe space” that you can come back to, etc. Also, EMDR specifically tends to often be a little rigid/scripted in the types of visualizations and metaphors you’re “supposed” to use, but in my opinion a good therapist should be flexible enough to adapt to equivalent images/techniques you may already have (like, “imagine you’re viewing the traumatic memory on a movie screen, or out the window of a train going through a tunnel” is a common instruction; if, say, your headspace has a lot of fantasy elements and it makes more internal sense to be viewing the memory via…scrying in a dish or something, your therapist should be down with you doing that instead, if you want to).

As for the sessions themselves, a big thing we don’t hear articulated a lot is that, in our experience  and that of some other folks we know, EMDR has a tendency of being…like, sneakily intense: It doesn’t necessarily hit you all at once in the session, which may just feel like “ok, that was Some Therapy Work but I’m chill”, but then over the rest of the day and maybe even the next few days, it’s not uncommon to keep feeling a lot of emotional intensity/vulnerability, having more intense “internal conversations and/or realizations”, etc. For this reason, EMDR is generally supposed to start with a very mild memory-to-process, like 4-5 out of 10 max.

Notes of Caution and Stuff to Keep In Mind

Especially for folks who already heavily dissociate from emotional trauma, it’s super easy to think you’re “going too easy” only to find that the memory has a lot more emotional baggage than you realized—really go easy on yourself when you start, EMDR is like psychology power tools and you absolutely can hurt yourself. (We’ve heard from plenty of systems who had bad therapists who did not adequately support them in doing EMDR, and absolutely fucked them over by starting too big and retraumatizing the hell out of them— this isn’t meant as fear-mongering, especially if you really like and trust your therapist, but just genuine “hey, EMDR can be very volatile stuff, which is part of why it can be so helpful, but also means that it’s important to not skip out on the safety precautions and self-care”.) What this means in practice is often stuff like: (our recommendations at least) - trying to schedule breaks/easy days immediately after - possibly getting someone to drive you home, especially if you know you’re going after a Big Thing, because the dissociation hangover immediately after can be pretty real - start with a memory that feels "too easy", and scale up if a week later it still felt trivial/like you’re fully over it, because it’s way easier to ramp up than try to do damage control.

Our personal experience, in tl:dr form, was that it felt like the core of the technique was really useful for us, and mirrored some of the most useful instances of self-processing we’d had before while also kind of serving as a “shortcut” to it—but, it was pretty intense and we didn’t really like/fit well with the therapists who we were working with at the time, which is why we stopped (didn’t want to keep doing an emotionally intense thing with folks we didn’t trust).

Finally, a bit about EMDR and "maybe I'm plural but I'm not sure, and/or may not have great in-system communication": yeah, this is a case to be especially slow and careful, for all the aforementioned reasons; what my instinct/recommendation would be in those cases is to: 1) make sure you learn a lot of resourcing techniques 2) try to check in with yourself(s) frequently and with compassion/intent-to-collaborate, "ask the inside of your head how it's feeling" and even if you're not sure whether the "reply" was just your own thoughts or a headmate, listen and try to engage with/respect those responses and emotions 3) if you start getting warning signs/back-off signals/sudden intense feelings, listen to them and lighten up, pause the session if you need to, do some self care etc, even (especially) if you don't know why you felt that way and it seems 'odd/random', and really you're super curious about what's going on and just want to figure it out. Like...you and the inside of your head and/or other system members are trying to navigate a complicated D&D maze together, in the dark, and you each only have part of the map--so you have to work together and trust each other, especially listening to warning signals even when your "part of the map" doesn't show anything to worry about there. And the more you work together and trust each other, the better everything gets, including therapy work.

When it's "Death By A Thousand Papercuts"-type Trauma Instead

If you're not sure where to start because there aren't a lot of obvious "Big Bad Memories" that feel like they adequately explain the issues you're having, some recommendations:

-> First, note that "no Big Bad Memories are immediately coming to mind, idk" is super common in systems and also in CPTSD, way more than I think most folks realize, so know that you're not alone and also that it doesn't mean you don't necessarily have stuff deserving of help and support.

-> So yeah, there's kinda two things imo you can try. The first is, if your therapist is on the more flexible side, you can try doing EMDR with either "this specific memory wasn't too bad, but it's representative of an ongoing pattern or theme that wasn't great" (say, loneliness at school or something, and you pick a specific lunchtime memory, which wasn't really That Bad in the moment, but you were kinda sad and/or upset about it and it feels representative of the overall trend you're trying to process/heal). Or you can try just doing the EMDR process on the theme itself, at the abstract level, and see what comes up--again, I'd really recommend starting with a much lower-stakes issue/theme than you think you need, just because it's really easy to underestimate, especially for systems and other folks whose brains dissociate a lot. (And especially if you know your system has episodic amnesia--e.g. event-amnesia/blackout amnesia--as well as emotional amnesia.)

The second is, there are other "more flexible" types of similar somatic therapy techniques (brainspotting is the name of another one, and there's more I can't think of rn) that might fit better instead-- tldr, totally worth asking your therapist about the whole situation, and asking what they'd feel most qualified for/comfortable with, in my opinion. You don't need to be doing Specifically Exactly EMDR to do somatic trauma therapy, even though EMDR is one of the more well-known modalities for it, and finding a version that feels right and not like you're forcing anything is really valuable (and you're not 'being picky' if it takes a while to find one; you're allowed to want to find one that feels right).

[strangererotica]

EXPLICIT CONTENT | MINORS DNI

Reader is female • Y/N is Billie in this story; Josef uses the alias John • Christian/Catholic imagery mentioned, as well as cancer/death • dry humping, breast worship, coming in clothes, some aggression/biting, squirting, Josef lying/manipulating but he’s hella cute doing it… 😊 🥳 happy new year 2025!

You never did anything like this. It was fucking insane. Risky at the very least, and at the worst, potentially deadly. Yes you were strapped for cash, but responding to an anonymous Craigslist ad to record a man in private-with god knows what in mind-was an incredibly bold move, even for you. Thankfully, you were meeting at a hotel, instead of his private residence, a fact that made you feel slightly less worried. If the guy did turn out to be a serial killer or something, you at least had the guarantee of people close by who could hear you scream for help. That is, of course, if you were able to scream at all. You considered that the ‘audience,’ you were hoping for in the form of hotel guests may turn out to be witnesses instead.

The thought chilled you, and you tried to put it out of your mind. This was a responsible act, you told yourself, not the reverse. It would be irresponsible to miss rent again, to potentially lose your home. Times were tough; the debt you’d acquired from college wasn’t going anywhere soon. It was time to put the creative arts degree you’d worked for to use. Filming some guy in a hotel room for a few hours, for well over a thousand dollars, balanced things out in your mind. He was probably just some weirdo making an avant-garde film, you assured yourself. And if by chance the guy ended up having genuine talent himself, combined with your editing skills, the film might actually be an important addition to your resume.

Finding the hotel was easy enough. You’d driven past it on the highway probably hundreds of times in your life, so the name was familiar to you. But you’d never been a guest at the hotel, nor had you really seen it up close. In perspective, it wasn’t quite as clean-cut as your brief glimpses from the highway had suggested. The word that came to mind for describing the place was ‘seedy,’ like you were walking onto the location of Dan Bell’s Another Dirty Room series. Your instincts told you this was a bad sign, both figuratively and literally, as you took in the sun-bleached name of the hotel emblazoned above the lobby entrance. You reminded yourself of the money you needed, the money that was promised for you on the other side of Room 222’s door. The outside condition of the hotel didn’t really matter, you reasoned. Maybe the man who hired you was strapped for cash himself? Perhaps he didn’t have many options in terms of location, and simply chose the hotel that suited his budget? Maybe I shouldn’t be such a stuck-up bitch, you wondered, feeling a little ashamed. You’d been trying to work on slowing your initial responses to people and places, not wanting to judge a book by its cover, so to speak. It was a new year, and a new start for you towards being a more open-minded individual. This experience was testing your commitment to improving yourself, because your intuition was practically screaming at you to get the hell out of there.

Taking a deep, mindful breath, you entered the elevator. Its interior was just as dingy as the rest of the hotel, and when the doors opened on the second floor, you were hit immediately with the smell of stale cigarettes and booze. Another sigh, this one a little less mindful, left your lungs heavily. You adjusted the strap of your camera bag on your shoulder, and proceeded to room 22…

When you’d reached the stranger’s door, you took a second to settle your nerves before knocking twice. “John?’ you called, forcing your voice steady. “It’s Billie.” Only silence responded from behind the door at first, followed by the sound of footsteps quickly approaching. The door pulled open, just a crack, but enough for you to see the face of the man who’d hired your services for the next few hours. The first thing you noticed were his eyes. They were kind eyes, you assessed, a warm hazel with flecks of copper that revealed themselves when the light caught them just right.

“You’re Billie?” Josef asked. He was obviously surprised, and you quickly realized why. “I was expecting someone…someone-.” Josef paused.

“Male?” you offered. “I get that a lot.” Josef chuckled good-naturedly, his friendly smile easing your nerves. “Well with a name like Billie,” he said, pulling back the door for you. “I can imagine it happens a lot. Please-.” He waved his hand past himself to the room. “-Come in.”

The more you saw of Josef, the more you liked him. He was taller than you, but not so tall that it was off-putting. He was just right, the kind of height you wouldn’t even have to lift on your tiptoes to kiss. The mental image flickered through your mind, and you cleared your throat, remembering why you were there in the first place. Yes he was a good looking guy, who for some reason put you at ease in a way you’d never felt when meeting someone new before. But you were there for the sole purpose of capturing his artistic vision on film, and for that purpose alone.

“So what did you have in mind, John?” you asked, setting your bag down on one of the two queen beds. Josef cocked his head, his curious expression returning. The door clicked shut behind him. You watched to make sure he didn’t turn the lock. Even though you really liked this guy, he was still a stranger. And you were still standing here with him in a sleazy hotel room, with his body currently between you and the door.

“I appreciate your question, Billie,” he said, emphasizing your name. “Billie. Billie the Kid. Anyone ever call you that, Billie?”

You felt your cheeks flush a little, because for some reason, his question felt like a compliment, even though it wasn’t. “I-um,” you distractedly tucked a strand of hair behind your ear. “My dad used to call me that. When I was little.”

Josef nodded, snapping his fingers for emphasis. “Smart man. He had vision. As do I-.” He ducked suddenly around a corner and returned with what looked to be a veil, like the kind you’d seen the Virgin Mary depicted wearing in art. Josef draped the lace fabric over his shoulders and approached you, his face and tone solemn with importance: “…And with your creative direction, Billie, my vision will be brought to life…It was fate herself that willed our paths should cross…” Josef took another step closer, close enough that you began to worry he could hear your heart racing. “You could have been any other Billy…even a Bill, even a William for that matter but no, my dear sweet Billie-.” Here, Josef’s hands moved to cup your face in his palms, your eyes going wide in surprise. “…This is destiny,” he continued, almost in a whisper. “We’re partners now.” He went slowly to his knees before you, his palms together as if in reverence. “Blood of my blood…flesh of my flesh…” You recognized the paraphrased scripture as you gazed down on the strange man knelt at your feet. Josef took your hands in his, rising to a standing position, his eyes never leaving yours. “Oh my god, Billie…Oh my god,” he said through a warm smile, eyes lit with excitement. “This is gonna be a good night...”

Over the course of the following hour, you watched and recorded, offering input as requested from your client: a little change in lighting here, a play with background props there. From what you could tell, the vision Josef had in mind was a sort of religious horror short. His ‘character,’ was meant to be a man possessed by unholy forces. The Devil has a deadline, a certain amount of time he’ll allow the man before the demons take over completely. The man knows his time is up, that he’s in his final hours. He hires someone to document on film his last night on earth, before he’s unwillingly summoned to his unavoidable fate in Hell.

As a concept, it all sounded really cool. Bringing that concept to life however, with no budget and a lead who couldn’t act, was not cool by any stretch of the imagination.

Regardless of the details and Josef’s lackluster performance, nothing could have prepared you for what happened next. Whereas his character was standing strong in the trenches of spiritual warfare, it appeared that Josef himself was breaking down. You knew something was wrong, that he was no longer acting when he deviated sharply from the script and began to shed real tears, not the miserably-unconvincing ones he’d faked for a scene.

“Hey…it’s okay, John,” you assured him. He knelt at the bedside on which you were seated, resting his head in your lap. Your pulse lurched, heart thudding inside your chest. You weren’t sure what to do, so you did the only thing that seemed right: you gently stroked Josef’s cheek in an awkward attempt at comfort. The tears had slowed, but they picked right up again when Josef revealed his left hand, which bore a wedding ring. Your heart sank at seeing it. “My wife,” Josef began solemnly. “This whole project was her idea…She wrote the script, created this character, his whole history…”

You nodded as you listened, your hands dropping to your sides. There’s no way you were going to be touching a married man like that. “…She wanted me to play him, to bring her creation to life,” Josef continued. “It was her greatest wish…and sadly, her last wish…” You hated yourself for feeling it, but a sense of relief washed over you. He wasn’t married after all. At least, not anymore.

“…The cancer took her three years ago,” Josef tearfully revealed. “Three years and I still haven’t made her dream come true…I’m still letting her down, to this day…” His lament was cut short by a sob, words fading into your lap as he wept there. You reflexively began to stroke Josef’s cheek again, because you’d only seen someone this upset a few times in your life. You couldn’t not offer him some kind of comfort; he was obviously hurting, deeply. “I think what we’ve made so far is great, John,” you told him. “From the looks of the script, it seems like you’re following it exactly as your wife wrote it.”

He tilted his head to look up at you, eyes wide and hopeful. “Do you mean it?” Josef asked. With a nod of confirmation, you replied “yeah, I do. I think you’re doing a great job.” His eyes narrowed slightly, a darker look overtaking them. Josef rose abruptly to his feet, and began to pace back and forth around the room. “I don’t believe you,” he declared flatly, in a voice so low you had to ask him to repeat himself. “I don’t BELIEVE you,” Josef insisted, adding “You’re probably sitting there thinking this guy can’t act worth a goddamn…you know I can’t do her dream justice, you’re just refusing to say it! You probably think I’m a failure, don’t you Billie?” He almost sneered your name at you, and normally, you wouldn’t have taken this kind of verbal abuse from anyone. But you knew this wasn’t a normal kind of hurt that Josef was feeling. This man was grieving, haunted by a level of grief you hoped never to experience. Remembering your commitment to judging others less, you knew that right now, Josef wasn’t behaving rationally. He was acting in his grief, and you wouldn’t let yourself take his sharp change in attitude personally. Instead, you calmly came to Josef’s side. You turned his face to yours, letting your fingertips linger along his jawline. The muscles in his throat tensed against your palm, veins pulsing with the rhythm of his heartbeat.

Josef’s eyes were wet and wide, like a puppy who’d been scolded. “I don’t think you’re a failure, John,” you told him confidently, a warm smile on your lips as your thumb brushed Josef’s. “I think your wife was lucky to have a husband who loved her so much. I think you’re a very special man.” He swallowed, his Adams apple bobbing under your fingertips. “Do that again,” Josef told you, his voice as much a prayer as a command.

“Do what?” you asked. Every indication of sadness had faded from Josef’s face, the tension in his body evaporating. “Tell me I’m special,” he replied. Josef’s hands went to your shoulders, gripping softly. “You’re special, John,” you said. “So, so special…” You brushed your mouth lightly against his, breath hitching as Josef’s tongue slipped between your lips unexpectedly. He was aggressive, impatient in a way that told you he hadn’t been touched in a long time. Josef’s hands were everywhere at once, finding your ass and clutching it in one hand while clumsily groping for your tits with the other. You let him lay you back against one of the beds, his hand pawing between your legs and massaging you through your jeans. You arched upward, keening into Josef’s thrusts, his bulge grinding into your thigh as he clumsily humped against it. Your hips trembled as his fingertips found your clit. The front seam in your jeans was positioned between your labia; Josef’s fingertips rubbed rough circles into the denim, kneading your cunt through the fabric. He buried his head against your shoulder, his mouth a wet mess of tongue and teeth, consuming the feel of your skin, its texture, its taste.

You curled your fingers in the hair at the back of Josef’s head, clutching him into you. His lips traveled down your neck and along your collarbone, tongue gliding between your breasts. Opening his jaw wide, Josef drew as much of your breast inside his mouth as he could. Your nipple hardened to meet his tongue, a warm, wet pressure flicking against it. Your grip in Josef’s hair tightened as you arched, pressing your tit against his face, offering as much of your breast as his mouth could hold. Josef sucked at your breast in a rhythmic tug, massaging your aerola between the muscles in his cheeks. He whimpered softly, a sign you interpreted as an expression of pure need. Josef needed to be held, to be cherished. He needed to be desired by a woman again.

You tugged back Josef’s hair to lift his head from your breast. He groaned at the pull to his scalp. A dark smile briefly touched his lips as he indulged himself to enjoy the sting. Josef’s mouth crashed against yours, his tongue forcing past your lips in a kiss that was somehow more greedy than the ones before it. His hands were on your hips, keeping them spread. Your clit throbbed against the bulky outline of Josef’s erection. He ground his hips forward, rutting his cock into the now-saturated crotch of your jeans. He whimpered again, returning his mouth to your breast. Josef clutched your other breast tightly, kneading the soft mound in his hand. Your nipple was swollen and sensitive against Josef’s rough palm as he groped you, his mouth busy at work suckling your other breast while his cock strained at the seams separating your skin. You came hard, rocking beneath the weight of Josef’s body pressing down on you. Your orgasm completely soaked through your jeans and wet the bed under you. Every punch of Josef’s hips produced a slick, saturated sound as he rutted your ass inside a puddle of your own juices. He growled into your breast, like something animalistic. The vibration of his chest against yours was like the low purr of a lion, rattling your lungs as if Josef was inside you, replacing the very air you breathed with himself. His thrusts grew sharper, his fingernails digging into your skin. You winced as Josef’s teeth suddenly nipped at your breast, his bite grazing your nipple as you pulled back in pain. Josef’s hands went quickly to your shoulders, pinning you down, his mouth immediately returning to your breast. Josef tugged and licked and sucked your breast till he was gushing cum into the crotch of his pants, a feral growl rolling from his chest as he claimed you…

In retrospect, you wish you hadn’t fallen asleep. You wish you could have checked in to make sure Josef was okay, to make sure he knew the brief time you spent together meant all that it meant to you. And even if none of that had been said, you would at least have liked the chance to say goodbye.

When you woke, Josef was already gone. He’d left your money on the bedside table, along with a note. The text read: Billie: Thanks for a special night. Beneath the text was what appeared to be a doodle of a wolf’s face. You knew it was unlikely you’d ever see Josef again. But just in case, you keep the note he left you, hoping that somehow, someday, you’ll have the chance to ask him what the little wolf doodle means… 🐺

[dollsinvogue]

Clawdeen Wolf core doll diary scans

Found a bunch of old monster high diaries and I wanted to share them! Also does anyone else remember these “unlock more online” codes??

English + Français transcription below

English:

this diary belongs to: Clawdeen Wolf

This is my diary. If you want your life to last longer than it takes to read it. You won't.

Unlock more online: MHCWPACK

July 14th

I got up late so there was no hot water left then I cut myself shaving this cause my razor was dull and I was in hurry to get out of the freezing water but amazingly enough the day actually went down hill from there… Later on Crescent, the alpha Kitty, must have sensed my mood cause instead of spending the night prowling around he curled up in my lap and Kept me company while sorted through my funk.

July 15th

It rained today. I hate the rain. It totally caused my hair to poof out and I was not about to spend the rest of the day looking like a were-poodle. So I grabbed a pair of electric clippers and 15 minutes later I had a new 'do. It's short, scary cute and perfectly wolfish I think I'll keep it for a while or at least until this rain goes away. I have decided that when I control my own fashion empire I'm going to have a stylist on call just for rainy days.

August 4th

I hate, hate, hate! sharing a room with my sister. Howleen totally growls in her sleep, she wears my clothes and she got sprayed by a skunk last week which means that every time she takes a bath, which isn't often, it stinks up the whole room. I'd hope she gets fleas but she'd just spread them to me.

August 7th

I've got to get serious about planning what I'm going to wear on the first day of school this year. I mean It's not like I'm worried about some monster showing up and looking more fabulous than me but I feel obligated to set the bar for everyone else. Last year on the first day of school I caused a minor traffic jam just walking across the school parking lot. It's going to be hard to top that but I've been experimenting with some new hair styles and I'm considering just asking for a school assembly so that crowd control won't be a problem.

August 10th

I tried a new hair remover made especially for werewolves. The label says it will totally eclipse unwanted hair and it's supposed to keep you hair-free for a week …not. It's expensive, it stings worse than wolfs bane and I still have to shave twice a day! What a rip…I could have used that money for a new belt.

August 15th

spent the day at Draculaura's. She's the absolute sweetest BMFF ever! Although if she doesn't stop trying to feed me tofu im going to bite her j/k ;p. She has like rooms and rooms of clothes. It's like a fashion museum. So awesome! She always says that were going to pick out clothes to give Ghoul Will but she always gives most of them to me. I pretend I don't need them but with so many brothers and sisters it's not like there's a lot of extra money to go around for new fashions. I guess we must have gotten a little loud though cause we woke up her dad. He doesn't really like werewolves very much but he tolerates me cause I'm friends with Draculaura. Whatever. It's not like I want to hang out with him either. Anyway, the best thing about Draculaura is that she doesn't give me clothes because she feels sorry for me, she does it because she’s my friend.

August 19th

Went to the Maul with Clawd today. He needed a new football and I needed to get some ideas for my next hair style. While I was there I saw the strangest thing. I was walking past the witches Kitchen supply store and saw Deuce Gorgon reading a cookbook! I yelled "Yo Deuce, trying to find a recipe for snake?" He dropped the cookbook and looked all embarrassed; at least I think he was. It's hard to tell what's going on behind those glasses. I think he would have tried to stone me but Clawd walked up and Deuce chilled. Sometimes it's cool to have the toughest guy in the school on your side. Thanks bro!

August 21st

If I were a mad scientist, the hairstyle experiment I tried today would be locked away in the lab never to see the light of day again. I flat ironed my hair so it was straight and then I razor cut it. As soon as the curl came back things got ugly. Even Howleen felt sorry for me. It's a good thing I'm the werewolf equivalent of Rapunzel and my hair will be grown out by the end of the week or I’d be wearing a hat until Halloween.

August 23rd

Draculaura tried to talk me into trying out for the fearleading squad again. Puhh…leeze. A list of why I'm not a fearleader:

I. I don't "Try out" for anything.

2. I wouldn't be caught human in those uniforms.

3-8 Boring and Cleo de Nile

9. While they're yelling for the boys I'm in the stands flirting with the boys.

10. Boring and Cleo de Nile.

I have thought about trying out just to show I could nake the team but then I look at my list again and it reminds me why I don't want to.

August 25th

Hung out at the Maul with Draculaura and met a new girl named Frankie Stein. She was shopping with her mom and fortunately for Frankie then ran into us. Otherwise she would have started the first day of school dressed like the Bride of Lame-n-stein. Frankie's beautiful and sweet but a bit naive. Fortunately, I’m here to make sure she gets properly educated in the ways of the fierce fashionista.

September 5th

Our annual End of summer family bar-boo-que was todan. Mmmmm...fat juicy steaks for everybody. Except for Draculaura of course. She brought tofu dogs, veggie burgers and a human boy named Jackson Jekyll. She'll always be my BMFF and the sweetest monster ever but ghoulfriend makes some strange choices. Anyway, I could tell he was really nervous, and what human surrounded by werewolves wouldn't be, until Clawd started talking about football and then the two of them kinda hit it off. I think Draculaura is major league crushing on this guy.

September 6th

I know most monsters are probably dreading starting school but not me. I want to learn as much as I can so that I'll be totally prepared when I start building my fashion empire. If for nothing else than to be able to move out of the house and get my own place without having to share everything with all my brothers and sisters. Oh no! I think I smell Howleen in the shower! Why couldn't I have been an only wolf?

About Me

Name: Clawdeen Wolf

Age: 15

Monster Parents: The Werewolf

Killer Style: I’m a fierce fashionista with a confident no-nonsense attitude. I'm also gorgeous, intimidating, and absolutely loyal to my friends.

Freaky Flaw: My hair is worthy of a shampoo commercial and that's just what grows on my legs. Plucking and shaving is definitely a full time job but that's a small price to pay for being scarily fabulous.

Pet: Crescent, a scary cute little kitten as fuzzy as I am.

Favorite Activity: Shopping and flirting with the boys!

Biggest Pet Peeve: I hate having so many of my brothers and sisters in school at the same time. They're annoying, embarrassing, and totally know how to push my buttons. Oh, and Cleo de Nile.

Favorite School Subject: Economics. One day I plan on having my own fashion empire and I want to know as much about business as I do about fashion.

Least Favorite School Subject: Gym. It's only because then won't let me participate in my platforn wedges.

Favorite Color: Gold- it’s the only thing Cleo de Nile and I can ever agree on

Favorite Food: Steak...rare.

BFF's: Frankie Stein and Draculaura

Français:

ce journal appartient à: Clawdeen Wolf

Ceci est mon journal intime. Si tu veux que ta vie dure plus longtemps que sa lecture...Tu ne le liras pas

Accède à plus de contenu en ligne: MHCWPACK

14 juillet

Je me suis levée en retard, et il n’y avait plus d'eau chaude. Ensuite, je me suis coupée en me rasant parce que mon rasoir n’était pas bien affûté et que j'étais pressée de sortir de cette eau glacée. Et la journée ne s'est pas améliorée... Plus tard, Crescent le chaton alpha doit avoir senti que je n'étais pas de bonne humeur, car au lieu de passer la soirée à tourner en rond, il s'est couché sur mes genoux et m’a tenu compagnie tant que je ne m'étais pas remise de mes émotions.

5 juillet

Il a plu aujourd'hui. Je déteste la pluie. À cause de ça, mes cheveux étaient hors de contrôle. Je n'avais pas l'intention de passer le reste de la journée avec un look de caniche-garou. Alors j'ai pris deux tondeuses électriques et 15 minutes plus tard, j'avais une nouvelle coupe! C'est court, effroyablement joli et reflète parfaitement ma nature de loup. Je pense que je vais garder ce style un bout de temps, ou au moins le temps que la pluie cesse. J'ai décidé que lorsque je dirigerai mon propre empire de la mode, j'aurai un styliste de garde rien que pour les jours de pluie.

4 août

Je déteste, déteste, déteste!! partager une chambre avec ma soeur. Howleen groque dans son sommeil et elle porte mes vêtements. Une mouffette l'a arrosée la semaine dernière, ce qui signifie que chaque fois qu'elle prend un bain, c'est-à-dire pas très souvent, ça sent dans toute la pièce. Je lui souhaiterais bien d'attraper des puces, mais elle me les transmettrait aussi.

7 août

II faut que je pense sérieusement à ce que je vais porter pour la rentrée scolaire cette année. Ce n'est pas comme si j'avais peur qu’un autre monstre ait l'air plus fabuleux que moi, mais je me sens obligée de mettre la barre assez haute pour les autres. L'année passée, lors de la rentrée, j'ai provoqué un mini-embouteillage rien qu'en traversant le stationnement de l'école. Ça va être difficile de renouveler l'exploit, mais j'ai essané quelques novveaux stules de coiffure et j'envisage de demander une réunion scolaire pour qu'il y ait un meilleur contrôle des foules.

10 août

J'ai essayé une nouvelle crème dépilatoire conçue spécialement pour les loups-garous. L'étiquette dit qu'elle fait totalement disparaître les poils indésirables et elle est censée les empêcher de repousser pendant toute une semaine... mon oeil! Ça coûte cher, ça sent pire qu'ne meute de loups et je suis toujours obligée de me raser deux fois par jour! C'est du vol... J'aurais pu utiliser cet argent pour une nouvelle ceinture.

15 août

J'ai passé la journée chez Draculaura. C'est vraiment la plus gentille de toutes les amies! Mais si elle essaie encore de me faire avaler du tofu, je vais la mordre! Je blague...;p. Il y a plein de pièces remplies de vêtements chez elle. Un véritable musée de la mode! C'est super! Elle dit toujours que nous allons choisir des vêtements à donner à des oeuvres de charité, mais elle m'en donne toujours la plus grande partie. Je fais semblant de ne pas en avoir. besoin, mais avec tous mes frères et soeurs, il ne reste pas beaucoup d'argent pour magasiner. Je crois qu'on a fait un peu trop de bruit l'autre jour parce que nous avons réveillé son père. Il n'aime pas vraiment les loups-garous mais il me tolère parce que je suis amie avec Draculaura. Peu importe. Ça n'est pas comme si je voulais être son amie. De toute façon, ce qu'il y a de bien avec Draculaura c'est qu'elle ne me donne pas des vêtements parce qu'elle a pitié de moi, mais parce que c'est mon amie.

19 août

Je suis allée aux Galeries l'Épouvante avec Clawd aujourd'hui. Il avait besoin d'un nouveau ballon de football et je cherchais de nouvelles idées pour ma prochaine coiffure. Là-bas, jai vu quelqu'un chose de très étrange. Je passais devant le magasin de chaudrons de sorcière et j'ai aperçu Deuce Gorgon en train de live un livre de cuisine! J'ai crié «Hé, Deuce! Tu cherches une recette de serpents?» Il a lâché le livre et avait l'air très embarrassé, du moins c'est ce que j'ai pensé. C'est difficile de deviner ce qui se passe derrière ces lunettes. Je crois qu'il aurait bien essayé de me transformer en pierre, mais Clawd s'est approché et Deuce s'est calmé. Quelque fois, c'est cool d'avoir le gars le plus costaud de l'école de son côté. Merci!

21 août

Si j'étais un savant fou, l'expérience de coiffure que j'ai essayée aujourd'hui resterait à jamais sous clé dans le laboratoire. J'ai utilisé un fer pour aplatir mes cheveux avant de les couper au rasoir. Mais quand mes boucles naturelles sont revenues, le résultat était horrible. Même Howleen avait de la peine pour moi. Une chance que je suis l'équivalent de Raiponce chez les loups-garous et que mes cheveux auront repoussé d'ici la fin de la semaine, sinon j'aurais dû porter un chapeau jusqu'à l'Halloween.

23 août

Draculaura a encore essayé de me convaincre de passer une audition pour la brigade de la terreur. Pfff... sans espoir. Voilà la liste des raisons pour lesquelles je ne veux pas être dans la brigade:

I. Je ne fais pas d'auditions pour quoi que ce soit.

2. Je ne voudrais pas être vue dans ces uniformes.

3-8. C'est ennuyant... et Cleo de Nile

9. Pendant qu'elles crient pour encourager les garçons, je suis dans les gradins en train de flirter avec les garçons.

10. C'est ennuyant... et Cleo de Nile

J'avais pensé essayer juste pour montrer que je peux entrer dans l'équipe, puis j'ai jeté à nouveau un coup d'oeil à ma liste et ça m'a rappelé pourquoi je ne veux pas.

25 août

Je suis allée aux Galeries l'Épouvante avec Draculaura et nous y avons rencontré une nouvelle fille qui s'appelle Frankie stein. Elle magasinait avec sa mère et, heureusement pour Frankie, nous les avons rencontrées. Sinon, elle aurait commencé l'école habillée comme la fiancée de Horrible-stein. Frankie est belle et charmante mais un peu naive. Heureusement, je suis là pour assurer son éducation dans la plus pure tradition de la mode.

5 septembre

Aujourd'hui a eu lieu notre barbe-queue familial destiné à commémorer la Fin de l'été. Mmmmm.... des steaks gras et bien juteux pour tout le monde. Sauf pour Draculaura bien sûr. Elle avait apporté des saucisses de tofu, des hamburgers végétariens et un humain du nom de Jackson Jekyll. Elle sera toujours ma meilleure amie pour la vie et le monstre le plus gentil qui soit, mais elle fait parfois des choix étranges. Mais bon. J'ai remarqué quil était vraiment nerveux (mais quel humain entouré de loups-garous ne le serait pas)... Jusqu'à ce que Clawd commence à parler de football. Ensuite, ils ont eu l'air de bien s'entendre. Je crois que ce garçon intéresse vraiment Draculaura.

6 septembre

Je sais que la plupart des monstres n'ont pas le goût de retourner à l'école, mais pas moi. Je veux apprendre le plus possible pour être bien préparée le jour où je commencerai à bâtir mon empire de la mode. Même si ce n'est que pour pouvoir quitter la tanière et trouver un endroit pour moi toute seule où je n'aurai pas à partager quoi que ce soit avec mes frères et soeurs. Oh, non! Je crois que je sens Howleen sous la douche! Pourquoi je ne suis pas un loup unique?

Infos Personelles

Nom: Clawdeen Wolf

Age: 15 ans

Parents monstres: Le Loup-garou

Look d'enfer: J'adore vraiment la mode et j'ai une grande confiance en moi. Je suis également ravissante, redoutable et d'une grande loyauté envers mes amis.

Particularité: Mes cheveux sont diques d'une pub de shampooing... Le problème c'est qu'ils poussent aussi sur mes jambes. L'emploi d'une pince à épiler et d'un rasoir constitue définitivement un travail à temps plein, wais dest ou petit prix à paver pour paraître effroyablement fabuleuse.

Animal de compagnie: Crescent, un petit chaton affreusement miguon qui a autant de duvet que moi.

Activité préférée: Magasiner et flirter avec les garçons!

Ce que je déteste le plus: Je déteste avoir autant de frères et soeurs à l'école en même temps. Ils sont Tannants, embarrassants et savent exactement convient viénerver. Oh j'allais aublier...et Cleo de Nile.

Matière préférée à l'école : L'économie. J'aimerais avoir mon propre empire de la mode un jour, alors je veux en apprendre autant sur les affaires que j’en connais sur la mode l’étudier

Matière que aime le moins L'éducation physique. C'est juste parce que je v'ai pas le droit de mettre mes chaussures à plate-forme.

Couleur préférée : Or - C'est bien la seule chose sur laquelle Cleo de Nile et moi sommes d'accord.

Nourriture preférée Un steak... saiguant.

Amis pour la vie: Frankie Stein et Draculaura

[melikedraw]

As a fan of Eel Inaba.... Mayyybe you could write some Hcs for him and a s/o who loves to me around the water? If not maybe some Hcs for Cosmo and a s/o who loves to be in the nature :3333

Merman!Inaba, naga!Cosmo x human!reader (seperate)

Both? Both. Both is good /ref

Reader is gn, yanno the gist

~~~~~

Merman! Inaba:

- he isn't often out of the water at all, so you probably spotted him while he was hunting a land animal, like maybe a young deer drinking at the lake

- once his eyes landed on you, though, the thought of catching said deer immediately threw itself out of his mind

- he froze, as did you, considering whether he should attack or just dive back into the murky waters

- make any sudden movements and he's swimming away IMMEDIATELY

- he's very easily spooked and doesn't really have good experiences with most humans

- I say most, because he's pretty chill with urita and his bloodline because of the pact they have with his own

- unlike with Cosmo, you have to be very patient when it comes to Inaba

- one wrong move could lead to the loss of all the trust you've built up with him

- it probably takes weeks if not months of you coming to his lake everyday in order for him to realize you aren't hostile

- note that you should come and go at the same time everyday so that you become a part of his routine and he can get used to you easier

- it'll take even longer for him to let you get close to him, and probably more than half a year to let you touch him

- despite his aversion to touch, your presence, or lack thereof does affect him

- if you miss even a day, he'll pester you immediately once he sees you again, asking where you've been and warning you not to disappear again, or he'll stop seeing you (it's a lie, he'd miss you too much)

- he's not actually very good at producing human words/sounds so a lot of his complains would be incomprehensible noises (for humans) and when he does speak, it's very simple words

- he only knows words from his conversations with urita and even then he doesn't speak much, just listens

- also, he isn't very curious about humans, he thinks he knows enough and thus doesn't really question you about your anatomy or anything

- if you show curiosity towards him he might be a bit reluctant to answer your questions, especially if they're weird, but he does like that you seem to be interested in him

- he won't mind simple requests like asking to see his fins or feel his hair, but if you ask him to explain how his respiratory system works, he'll have no idea either

- if there were to be something he was curious about, it would be your skin's texture, especially your fingerprints

- he doesn't have any finger prints and his skin is slimy and scaly as compared to your relatively dry and slightly bumpy one

- you two have kind of a "he can touch you but you can't touch him" relationship

Naga! Cosmo:

- as opposed to Inaba, where you spot him, Cosmo was the one that found you

- you were going on your typical nature hike, same time everyday, and seeing you so routinely piqued Cosmo's attention

- he likes to hang out in the trees, his body draped over branches and he hangs his head down, staring as you walk your usual path

- once he deems you safe to come into contact with, he picks you up, wrapping his tail around you and pulling you up to his eye level, where you'll hang from the branch by his tail while he observes you

- this takes about 2 weeks, he isn't quite as wary of humans as inaba

- he never actually gets to see humans, so you're like a pleasant surprise to him

- don't try to squirm and wriggle your way out of his grasp, he'll just tighten his hold further, it's a subconscious thing, as he hunts via constriction and typically isn't trying to keep wriggling prey alive

- he knows he didn't make a very good impression and probably scared the shit out of you, but he's worried that you'll run away if he lets go, so instead he lowers the both of you to the ground where you two sit, you still bound by his tail

- attempts to initiate conversation but, due to lack of human contact, is very bad at it.

- barely knows any words, can at most say a greeting but that's it

- he makes you promise that you'll keep coming everyday and not avoid this path because of him

- and indeed you do, keeping to your routine, much to his joy

- you even teach him your language, which makes him really happy because now he can properly communicate with you and possibly other humans

- he's a very quick learner, smart boy

- you two have some sort of exchange of information, where you teach him to speak, and he teaches you about nagas

- he honestly doesn't know much, and can verbally explain even less, but he'll let you find out yourself

- really likes how curious you are, even if he doesn't understand many of the words you use in your questions

- he lets you touch him quite easily and isn't as particular about it since his whole hunting style revolves around being in close contact with his prey

- let's out soft noises when you run your hand down his tail, it tickles for him

- whatever you do to him, he'll do the same back, as if he's trying to mimic you in an attempt to communicate better

- like if you touch his hair, he'll touch yours back, if you tilt your head to the side out of curiosity, he'll follow suit

- definitely very curious about your legs and how you walk

- your legs are probably his favorite part of your body, it just intrigues him so much he has to know more

- will touch it without asking, ranging from a small poke to a grab and even sometimes a pinch

- he's just so curious!

- he'll even ask you to walk/run around so he can see how they work

- all in all y'all become close very quickly and he always tries to make you stay for as long as possible

~~~~~

Sigh I love them too anon...

[multiheadcanons]

ANYONE CAN BE A DOCTOR.

the blu spy stood in the desert wasteland, accompanied by his medic, his soldier, and about a hundred feet due south was his sniper.

today he decided he wanted to experience death.

he didn’t know why. he just wanted to toe the line.

he asked sniper to give him the kill shot. he was pretty confident about him being able to take the shot and make the trip to the respawn machine fast and efficient. his sniper didn’t flinch at the request, just asked for a time and day.

and here they all were. he doesn’t know why soldier also joined, but he guesses he was thankful that someone considered him a friend enough to watch him make a stupid decision.

“alright. time is… fifteen five. do we all know what’s occurring here today?” the medic began, doing his best to maintain confidence as well.

“we’re here to kill the spy.” the soldier said, not breaking eye contact with his spy. he was still unsure as to the why, but he felt like he needed to be there too. in case something went wrong.

“well, yes—”

“alright, well— SNIPER! TAKE THE SHOT!” the fast procession made the blue donned medic hiss.

“we are not ready for— you have no right to be calling the killshot!”

“oh, and you do?”

“i didn’t!”

as the spy watched the men argue, he felt a familiar chill run down his spine as he heard, about a hundred feet due south, the crack of a rifle, and within a second he felt the sting of the bullet pierce his back.

but he did not die.

he fell to his knees, gnashing his teeth in pain as he yelled out. that got the attention of the men who accompanied him. he looked down to see his blood staining his suit, and groaned. he didn’t have the energy to stand again, so he laid on his back in the sand. he had nothing to stare at but the sky.

“oh, SHIT—!” the two men yelled, beginning to scramble.

“fuck… fuck… fuck— YOU STUPID—”

“how could you miss the shot, sniper?? he was standing still!” medic yelled, and past the ringing of his ears, the frenchman heard a very quiet ‘oh FUCK’. “where is my medigun, where is my medigun—”

“oh god, i just wanted to die. instead i just got shot. oh god, how does the respawn machine work?” spy could not stop himself from speaking the things on his mind. “do i need to have blood for the respawn machine?”

“françois, it’s okay, it’s okay—” medic began, a stressed smile spreading as he patted his pockets for anything to aid.

“oh my god… i could’ve picked any other name. i could’ve picked any other name and i picked françois. and you let me do it. my god; i don’t want to die a françois.”

“we’ll change it when you get back.” he hissed. “shit! i’ll be back.”

soldier watched the doctor break in a sprint back to base. he turned, and crouched next to his spy.

“so. françois, huh? you picked that?”

“i have made many bad decisions.”

“hm.” he responded. “i’d finish the job if i had anything to do it with.”

“i’m not particularly interested in dying anymore. this hurts.”

“getting shot will do that to you.”

they sit in silence, as spy continued to struggle for air. as he stared at the sky, he watched soldier look up, a confused look spreading on his face. “doc? did you mean to grab that?” the doctor’s head began to slowly descend from the top of his vision, a smile even worse than the one he attempted before.

“hi, buddy…” he began slowly, kneeling at his head. “we’re going to move you now. it’s going to hurt.”

“do you not have your medigun? where is that?” he asked, brows already furrowed in pain, but his eyes now narrowing in suspicion.

“i couldn’t find it. it’s a faster trip to walk.” that sounded like a lie. a bad one. “we’re going to move you now. it’s going to hurt. just… close your eyes and we’ll lift you on three, okay?” the doctor’s smile, he thought it was supposed to be comforting. it was not comforting. he could attempt to stand himself, but the pain actively pushing through his body was too much. he obeyed, and his eyes began to close.

“your bedside manner is awful. one.”

“doc. doc what are you—”

“twothree—”

and his eyes opened to the infirmary. no longer in active pain. cocking his head only slightly to the left, in plain view, was the medigun. he sat there for a moment. feeling his heart beat. feeling the ghost of the bullet in his back. he doesn’t know how long he sat there before the doctor entered the infirmary.

“so you killed me.”

“it was faster to do than putting you through more suffering to move you. we are not in the field. you don’t have to suffer. i did not let you.” he sounded so matter of fact about it.

“you never planned to actually transport me here alive.”

“not at all.” another simply stated fact. a fact that left bile in the spy’s throat. he stood, stumbling slightly as he regained his bearings in an alive body.

“you claim to be better than your creator.” he spit out. “you’re just like him. your apple did not fall far from his tree.” that only got a laugh from the blu doctor.

“truly, spy. anyone can be a doctor. i cared enough about keeping you alive without suffering that i cut that experience short.” he said, the remnants of his smile fading. “i may be just like him. but in many ways i’m better. you’ll see that soon.”

[gutter-bot]

A - Z Megatron X Reader

Rating: Mature

Warnings: slavery, torture, asphyxiation

Megatron/Reader (You) in which you are an unlucky human who has caught the attention of a deranged alien warlord

G is for Gasp

Your eyes were burning, the vessels in them beginning to burst as the pressure continued to mount. Tears slipped past your lashes and streamed down your face into your hair, and you work your fingers vigorously against the unflinching metal grip that pins you in place. The effort is entirely fruitleas, nails chipping and tearing as you claw at your throat and the massive hand of your captor.

Well... fingers, really. Only two of them that he uses to keep you in place. It's been a small eternity, and now your vision is beginning to dim, your attempts to free yourself growing weaker... slower. Your body - lungs and brain deprived of oxygen - begins to shut down.

'Just do it already... kill me... please!'

You're unable to speak the words, so you mouth them, hoping he will see and understand... and have mercy on you.

He sees. He understands. But instead of freeing you from your pitiful mortal coil, he releases you, and air floods your lungs. You lurch violently up, gulping in a breath and turning onto your side as your body is racked with painful coughs. Several minutes seem to tick by as you splutter and wheeze, nose running and limbs shaking. All the while your tormentor watches closely, his expression pleased.

Finally, you settle, slow tears still pattering against the enormous hand he has you cradled in. If he minds, he doesn't say anything.

"Why?" you rasp, the word like razorblades in your throat.

His deep laughter is something you feel as it reverberates in the air around you, the smile that accompanies his mirth the furthest thing from pleasant.

"Because this planet is now mine, and I must find some value in its inhabitants... even if your only purpose is to amuse me with your suffering, I will make good use of you."

The cruel admission sent chills deep into the very marrow of your bones. You weren't told much when you first arrived here, but you did know you weren't the only human to be subjected to this monstrous giant's attentions. You were, however, the only one still alive. And - according to him - you had lasted longer than any of the others... a terrifying thought considering it had only been two weeks.

He liked you. You would never have considered such a thing but for the fact that another alien had told you as much. You were resilient, a trait he valued, apparently. And it would appear his intention was to see just how resilient you could be, as he put you through a plethora of 'experiments' to test your durability and spirit. He always seemed unaffected by your pleading, but positively delighted to watch you fight - despite the pointlessness of the act.

A horrified part of you wondered if he got off on it. If he even could 'get off'. Not that you wanted to find out.

You didn't flinch this time as he lifted his hand again, knowing what was coming next. Instead of wrapping his massive talons around your throat, the tip of one nudged you along the top of your head, ruffling your hair in a strange parody of what you believed was a 'head pat'. It was a pattern. He would call upon you at random, subject you to some form of torture, and then stroke you with a gentleness that belied his previous actions... like he was praising a pet for learning a new trick. It was all quite sick... and while you knew your suffering was over for the time being, a part of you wished he would accidentally drop you as he walked, the height of the fall surely enough to break your neck. At least that way, you didn't have to spend the following few days wondering what kind of perverse abuse he planned to subject you to next.

[taffywabbit]

it feels weird to finally get a year where I get to say this but I think maybe 2024 actually WAS my year. hopefully not the last, but it really feels like the first, at least in a long time. I was stagnant and static and drifting without much momentum in any direction for quite a while, and then suddenly this year:

I finally moved into a solo apartment and am no longer living in a house with an ever-shifting pool of like 5 roommates. having my own quiet comfy space to cook and relax and be nocturnal without bothering anyone has been HUGE for my mental health

I worked very hard to recoup the money I lost from that move and got myself in a fairly stable and comfortable position again, work-wise

I finally started HRT in June, after about 5 years of waiting/struggling to find a doctor/fear/general motivation issues. which absolutely kicks ass and is probably the highlight of the whole year if I had to pick just one

I also finally got diagnosed with ADHD and (with a little trial and error) got medicated for it, which is another thing I've been trying to sort out for like 6 years. hey did you know executive dysfunction and problems with memory/task management/motivation make it really hard to go through the process of getting treated for the cause of those symptoms? wild huh

I rekindled a much closer relationship with a couple of my younger siblings, especially the elder of my two sisters, and we have really nice chats fairly regularly now (crazy considering we did nothing but fight constantly for like 20 years lol)

I came out fully to my family, for better or worse, and MOST of them have been surprisingly chill and supportive about it

I worked on a little game project with a friend for a couple months! it didn't end up working out but I learned a lot from the experience

I started doing WAY more personal art and kinda rediscovered my passion for it, and as a result I've progressed a lot stylistically and technically within the past few months

I beat Pseudoregalia 94 times since the first time I tried it in February. not really an achievement on the same level as all this other stuff but I'm still proud of it

like idk! there were a lot of rough patches this year and I was honestly pretty burnt out for the first half of it, but 2024 still feels like the year where I bundled up all my frustration about going nowhere with my life and achieving none of my goals and turned it into fuel to just blaze through a bunch of stuff in the back half. I wish I'd done a lot of it sooner, but life has been reminding me a lot lately that it really IS better late than never, so I'm trying to keep that perspective in mind and not let the idea of a ticking clock intimidate me like it used to. I am trying to be optimistic that 2025 will allow me to continue this momentum. we'll see I guess!

idk if I really have any resolutions per se? I guess I'd really like to make music more often in 2025, even if it's just small things I do in one or two sittings occasionally instead of full songs. I started writing a song this year, with lyrics and everything, and then didn't finish putting it together, so at the very least I'd like to make THAT happen soon. I think finding a way to get myself back into animation casually would be neat too - I have a lot of mental hangups and personal roadblocks holding me back, largely from my awful college experience, but I think if I can just find some tools that are comfortable for me then I'll be able to conquer those and hopefully start enjoying it again on my own terms. there's other stuff I'd like to pick up this year as well but honestly I'm keeping my expectations small for now and we'll just see what happens! let's do it, wahoo

[vindicated-truth]

Hyeok downs the drink in one abrupt toss of his head. He slams the glass down harshly, rattling the counter and startling the bartender minding his own business at the other side of the bar.

Beside him, Jeongje glowers at him. “You really must be a favored patron at this bar if you’re not scared of destroying their property like this.” Jeongje frowns at the glass that somehow manages to not shatter at the way Hyeok is gripping it tightly. “Or get kicked out.”

Hyeok ignores him and grabs the expensive whiskey bottle he had just purchased without thinking it through, just for this moment. He refills Jeongje’s glass—technically he is the maknae between them—and as Jeongje warily sips at his own drink, Hyeok runs his hands over his face at the hysterical realization that he’s sharing a moment like this with Park Jeongje, of all people.

His rival to Lee Yuyeon’s heart.

Beside him, Jeongje is watching the amber liquid swirl around the fancy ball-shaped ice, his gaze darting nervously between his own glass and at Hyeok, like a skittish weasel.

It’s beginning to grate on Hyeok’s nerves, and he pours another shot for himself.

Jeongje loudly clears his throat. “So. Do we agree not to tell Yuyeon-ah about this?”

Hyeok squeezes his eyes shut. And there is the crux of the matter, isn’t it.

“Tell me what?”

Both men jump at that familiar, beloved voice. It’s almost comical, the way they both swivel in unison on their seats to see the mutual object of their affections standing behind them, one hand on her hip, staring at them with an arched, perfectly-plucked eyebrow.

The top law graduate of Seoul National University, a force to be reckoned with at Hyeok’s law firm, the ex-girlfriend Jeongje is trying very hard to win back at the same time that Hyeok is trying to win her over—while trying win over her, as they’re currently going head to head in this corporate case where he represents the prosecution, and she represents the defendant.

None of that, however, is what’s making both Jeongje and himself a lot more terrified of her than usual.

Yuyeon narrows her eyes at them as she sets her briefcase on the counter and gracefully slides on the seat beside Hyeok. Normally Hyeok would be thrilled to have her in such close proximity, and would gloat over the way she has chosen his side of the seat to settle on instead of Jeongje’s, but right now, he wishes very much that Jeongje’s the one who’s going to have to deal with—all of this.

After all, Jeongje should have more experience dealing with—all of that.

Yuyeon motions to the bartender. “I’ll have a glass please,” she says sweetly, and Hyeok can see the bartender absolutely melting at the twin powers of her angelic beauty and her formidable presence. “I’ll share in whatever they’re having.” She tilts her head at the bottle of whiskey Hyeok and Jeongje are sharing between them.

She smiles and thanks the bartender for the chilled and iced glass she’s been given. She then turns to Hyeok. “Well?”

Jeongje nudges Hyeok meaningfully. Hyeok swallows and fills Yuyeon’s glass, hoping she doesn’t see how much his hands are shaking.

“Something’s up with the two of you,” Yuyeon declares without preamble as she sips and peers at them over the rim of her glass, and damn it why does this woman whom Hyeok helplessly loves beyond measure have to be so god damned smart?

Jeongje’s forced laugh sounds fake even to Hyeok’s own ears, and it makes him cringe. “Come on, Yuyeon-ah, what makes you say that?”

“Well,” Yuyeon sets her glass down on the counter—gently, primly, completely opposed to how Hyeok nearly broke the countertop earlier. “For one thing, right now the two of you are together.”

Jeongje frowns and straightens in his seat. “How is that supposed to be an issue?”

Yuyeon snorts. “Considering how the two of you constantly try to one-up each other to even tolerate being even in the same room together, let alone sharing a drink like this—” she stares pointedly at the twin glasses they’ve both been nursing for awhile now, “—is enough evidence for suspicion, Your Honor,” she adds playfully, winking at them.

Jeongje, the traitor, looks absolutely charmed, and Hyeok takes advantage of Jeongje’s distraction for his own opening. “Captain Park and I have come to an agreement, you see.”

Jeongje blinks. “We have?”

Hyeok turns to glare at him. “Yes. We have.”

“I see,” Yuyeon says dubiously as she crosses her legs, distracting both men momentarily with the smoothness of her skin peeking from beneath her pencil skirt. “And what agreement might that be?”

“Yes, Prosecutor Kwon,” Jeongje props his chin on his palm and smiles innocently at Hyeok. “What agreement are you talking about?”

Hyeok is sorely tempted to bash the whole bottle of whiskey over the head of this stupid ex of Yuyeon’s. Instead, he pastes on his courtroom-ready smile. “Captain Park and I have agreed to desist this frankly immature rivalry between us.”

Yuyeon’s eyebrows fly to her hairline at the same time that the smile completely drops from Jeongje’s face. “And why exactly,” Jeongje says slowly, his eyes narrowed at Hyeok, “have we come to this agreement?”

Hyeok turns to Yuyeon and clasps his hands in front of him on the countertop. “I believe it was that college girl, Kang Minjeong-ssi, who called both Captain Park and I, and may I quote: ‘A pair of juvenile schoolboys fighting each other over a girl as a stupid trophy’.”

“Because she’s right,” Yuyeon says wryly. “You are. And I’m not.”

“No, Yuyeon-ah,” Hyeok hears Jeongje speak up softly from behind him, and Hyeok knows without a doubt that Jeongje sincerely means it. “You’re not a prize to be won.”

It seems to have startled Yuyeon, her gaze softening in return, and while normally Hyeok would be bitterly seething with jealousy by now at the irreplaceable and unbeatable history between Yuyeon and Jeongje, at the moment Hyeok is inwardly, triumphantly celebrating at how Yuyeon is successfully distracted.

Jeongje seems to have finally caught on too, as he is quick to add, “So that is why Prosecutor Kwon and I have decided to just let you graciously decide who is the better man between both of us.”

Hyeok is about to nod in agreement, when Jeongje just has to purr: “I trust you know who is the more worthy man for you, Yuyeon-ah.”

Hyeok slowly turns to look at Jeongje. I am this close to punching you in the face, he strongly broadcasts his thoughts telepathically.

Jeongje’s smile is radiant. I’d like to see you try to punch a cop, is the telepathic answer.

Yuyeon’s loud gasp pierces through Hyeok’s burgeoning violent thoughts. Both he and Jeongje turn to face her—and they both blink at the way both of Yuyeon’s hands are clasped over her mouth, which has dropped open in shock.

“Oh,” she says like it’s some sort of epiphany, leaving both men entirely nonplussed. “Oh I should have known the two of you seem to hate each other just a little too much.”

Sometimes Hyeok is starkly reminded of how so far ahead Yuyeon’s brilliant mind works when he can’t catch up to her thoughts like this. It’s both extremely frustrating and wildly attractive in the courtroom. “What?”

Yuyeon smooths her hands over her skirt—and wow okay that is very distracting to Hyeok—as she straightens, her features seemingly overcome with a strange sort of… determination?

“I want you both to know that I will never let this affect your careers,” Yuyeon declares firmly. “Both of you are admirable, respectable men in each of your field of work and I will do my best to protect that.”

Hyeok stares blankly at her. He may not be a bonafide genius like Lee Yuyeon, but he has never considered himself lacking in the brains department either, and normally at this point he’s caught up to her by now. It’s what makes their courtroom banter so enjoyable.

This time, Hyeok is completely, utterly lost.

“What the hell are you talking about, Yuyeon-ah?” Jeongje bursts out from behind him, and for the umpteenth time in this topsy-turvy day, Hyeok finds himself agreeing with Captain Park.

There’s a flash of seemingly well-meaning but confusing sympathy that crosses Yuyeon’s eyes. “I know the laws of our country are still adamantly conservative, but we’re slowly making progress, little by little.” She brightens, her tone turning eager. “Just last month, the South Korean Supreme Court affirmed that same-sex couples are entitled to the same health benefits as heterosexual couples.”

Hyeok stares at her in horror. He can’t even speak.

“Oh my god,” Jeongje breathes out entirely in English, and once again, Hyeok absolutely concurs.

“You can register each other as dependents on your respective health insurances,” Yuyeon is saying, completely misreading the twin looks of shock and utter disgust both Hyeok and Jeongje are sending her way. “I’m pretty sure it’ll be covered by our firm, Hyeok-ah, I’m just not sure with the police force how it works—”

“Yuyeon-ah—” Jeongje helplessly tries to interject.

“—but our country’s actual law enforcement agency can’t deny basic rights to its own citizens, let alone its own policemen—”

Hyeok’s voice is increasingly turning high-pitched in desperation. “Attorney Lee—noona—”

“—regardless, you have my word that I fully support you in your—”

“We’re not the ones who are gay!”

That finally stops Yuyeon in her tracks. Hyeok’s and Jeongje’s twin outbursts finally catch her full attention—as well as those of the few remaining patrons in the bar.

Hyeok scowls at the bartender, who looks way too invested in their conversation. “I’ll pay you an extra huge tip for you to shut the hell up.”

The bartender grins, gives them a thumbs up, and turns his attention back to the same wine glass he’s been cleaning for several minutes now—right when Yuyeon first arrived.

Hyeok glares. “I will also require you to sign an NDA.”

The bartender shrugs and finally walks away—but not too far that he isn’t within earshot.

There’s a loud thunk beside Hyeok, which is the sound of Jeongje’s forehead hitting the counter. “I hate you all,” Jeongje mumbles under his breath, and right now, Hyeok is inclined to agree with him on everything.

Instead of being deterred however, true to her reputation as the woman who can’t be moved in court, Yuyeon is swift to recalibrate. “Then who is?”

Jeongje blearily lifts his head to stare balefully at Yuyeon. “What?”

Yuyeon narrows her eyes. “If the two of you aren’t the ones in a gay relationship—”

“Oh for the love of—Captain Park and I are not dating!” Hyeok yells; he catches the bartender snorting before the man wisely turns his back on them, and god damn that NDA needs to be airtight.

“—then who is?”

For several heartbeats, there is only silence as Yuyeon stares back and forth between Hyeok and Jeongje, silently demanding answers. Hyeok opens his mouth.

“His brother.”

Hyeok’s gaze snaps to Jeongje in utter betrayal as the older man simply points back at him.

Yuyeon’s brows furrow. “You have a brother?”

Hyeok turns helplessly back to Yuyeon, who is now frowning at him with her own expression of mild betrayal. “I didn’t know you had a brother, Hyeok-ah.”

“I don’t!” Hyeok instinctively exclaims, before he’s forced to reconsider his next words carefully when Yuyeon merely folds her arms, wordlessly calling him out on his bullshit. It’s partly why he loves her, after all—she never lets him get away with anything. “I mean, he’s not related to me by blood, but he was my ward for so long when I lived in his house that he might as well have been raised by me.”

Yuyeon tilts her head thoughtfully. “Why were you living in his house?”

“I was his tutor. It’s how I got myself through law school.”

Yuyeon raises her eyebrows. “Tutoring pays that well?”

“It does when it’s for the son of the Deputy Commissioner-General,” Jeongje pipes up, helpfully adding the important detail that Hyeok had been trying very hard to avoid disclosing to Yuyeon.

Hyeok is now reminded all over again of why he absolutely hates Captain Park.

“The son of—” Yuyeon’s eyes are wide. “You mean that brat from Foreign Affairs? Han fucking Joowon?”

Hyeok’s mouth drops open in shock. “You know him?” he says in unison once again with Jeongje, and they turn to each other in alarm.

“Know him?” Yuyeon nearly screeches as she slams her palm on the countertop, making both men jump in their seats; neither of them has ever seen Yuyeon this worked up before. “I’m this close to filing a restraining order on him with how often he barges into my office unannounced! I don’t care if he’s the son of the Deputy Commissioner-General, this is abuse of power!”

Jeongje’s eyes narrow dangerously. “Is he harassing you, Yuyeon-ah?”

Yuyeon rolls her eyes at the unwarranted machismo. “Yes, but not in the way you think. This cheeky little prince keeps demanding for the case files I worked on a few months ago, about the Chinese illegal immigrants working as prostitutes in Gangwon and Busan. Said it was for a voice phishing case Foreign Affairs are investigating, but I know for a fact that this sting operation of his isn’t approved by his higher ups.” Yuyeon flips her hair over her shoulder with a frustrated exhale. “Who does he think he is cutting through all protocol and procedure and expecting people to just hand over his demands like he’s entitled to them?” 

“Ah," Hyeok mumbles meekly, "that does sound exactly like my Joowon-ah." He cowers when Yuyeon throws him a withering glare.

“So this pseudo-brother of yours is gay,” Yuyeon recaps once she’s somewhat calmed down. Of course she hasn’t forgotten the topic—once Yuyeon latches on a piece of information, she doesn’t stop until she finds the answer she’s looking for.

Hyeok wonders if Yuyeon is aware that she has more in common with Joowon than she thinks, but then swiftly realizes she might cut off his balls if he points it out, so he wisely remains silent.

He still wants to have children, after all.

She narrows her eyes at Hyeok. “What does that fresh young master have anything to do with me?”

Hyeok’s throat bobs as he swallows and tries his best to maintain eye contact with Yuyeon. When all else fails—plead the fifth.

Yuyeon’s frown deepens when she’s getting nothing out of Hyeok. Jeongje seems to have finally taken pity on him and gently intervenes. “Prosecutor Kwon and I were just discussing his worries over Lieutenant Han. Considering the kind of work being asked of cops like us, it’s not safe for gay men like Lieutenant Han to be out on his own in the field being exposed to all these bad men who might take advantage of him.”

There’s a crease on Yuyeon’s forehead that appears when she’s thoroughly thinking something through. “I understand how that might be concerning, but—” Yuyeon frowns. “Isn’t that kind of homophobic too? The assumption that just because Lieutenant Han is gay, it means he’s not strong enough to protect himself?”

The look Yuyeon is directing to both Jeongje and himself is now judgmental and disapproving, and Hyeok can’t help but admire the fact that, for someone she supposedly hates, Yuyeon is still defending Joowon solely on principle.

She really has much more in common with him than she realizes.

“Besides,” Yuyeon is saying, “it’s not as if he’s out there working alone. I’m pretty sure he has a partner.”

Both Hyeok and Jeongje freeze.

Yuyeon is contemplating deeply now. “Come to think of it, since these cases with the Chinese immigrants are happening concurrently in several regions, the jurisdiction now also falls to the Regional Investigation Unit. Which means—”

Yuyeon stops short. Slowly, she meets Jeongje’s gaze. 

“Which means Lieutenant Han’s partner is most likely… from the RIU.”

From his peripheral vision, Hyeok can see the way Jeongje is starting to panic. Plead the fifth, he telegraphs frantically. Plead the fifth!

Yuyeon’s gaze is piercing as she looks back and forth between the two unlikely men forming an alliance against her. Without breaking eye contact, she reaches for her briefcase, rummages swiftly inside, and takes out her phone. She presses the first number on speed dial.

The other line picks up immediately.

“Uri dongsaengie!”

The unmistakable voice of Lee Dongsik rings cheerfully loud on speaker.

“Ne, uri oppa-ya,” Yuyeon drawls, and oh god, Hyeok recognizes that sickeningly-sweet tone on her.

In court, it means that somebody is about to have a very long conviction or pay a very high fine.

Outside of court—it means someone is about to be in very, very big trouble.

“To what do I owe the pleasure of this call from my dear sweet lovely twin sister?”

Hyeok and Jeongje look at each other in mutually shared pity. Lee Dongsik is about to get his ass whooped in three… two…

“Oppa,” Yuyeon says slowly, sweetly—menacingly. “Why is it that it’s my courtroom rival and my ex boyfriend who are the first to be informed that my dear sweet lovely twin brother is gay?”

There’s silence at the end of the line for several long moments. Briefly Hyeok considers adding bearing witness to a murder clause in the NDA.

“So,” Dongsik’s tone is suspiciously bright. “Who do I kill first?”

Hah. Never let it be said that Hyeok isn’t smart enough to anticipate moments like this.

“Park Jeongje, preferably,” Yuyeon remarks airily.

“Duly noted, sis.”

“Yah!” Jeongje exclaims. “Where's the loyalty to your best friend? Why don’t you kill Prosecutor Kwon first?”

They hear a snort from the other end of the line. “I’ll leave that for Joowon-ah to deal with.”

Another silence hangs heavily in the air. Yuyeon’s smile turns lethal.

“… I just gave it away, didn’t I.”

“Oppa.”

Both Jeongje and Hyeok get on their feet as they slowly back away. Of their many, many differences, the one thing they have most in common is how well they know the woman they mutually love.

They know precisely when she’s about to blow.

“When were you gonna TELL ME—!”

“Yuyeon-ah I can explain! Joowon-ah, help me out here—yah, where are you going? I’M ABOUT TO BE MURDERED BY MY OWN TWIN SISTER I NEED A WITNESS—!”

That NDA is going to have a lot of very, very specific clauses.

[randoimago]

May I kindly request Junpei, Akihiko (P3) and Yosuke (P4) with a male!s/o?

Basically they meet an experienced persona user that's so cool and awesome that it causes them to have a gay awakening

Fandom: Persona 3, Persona 4

Character(s): Junpei, Akihiko, Yosuke

Note(s): Considering how canon is, I feel like Akihiko would be the most comfortable learning that he's crushing on a guy (he was pretty chill with the Aigis meeting Kotone scene).

Akihiko

Akihiko is impressed that you have experience with your persona prior to meeting. He already wants to train with you and figure out how you got your power and how long you've dealt with it alone. There's also some concern because he's seen personas go berserk or cause collateral damage so he wants to be someone you can confide in if you're carrying some past trauma too.

Akihiko doesn't care how it looks when he blows off his fangirls to be with you. He goes out to ramen with you, goes on jogs, walks to the dorm together. Rumors end up spreading easily, but he doesn't care. So long as you're okay with it too.

It's because of those rumors that he pauses and actually thinks about it. Akihiko knows that it's just a few students that talk about him being with you, but that's enough to make him ponder. He can't help but laugh when he does find himself entertaining the idea longer than what he'd be able to defend. Romance isn't his thing, however, so he might bring up the rumors sometime, but right now he's happy to stay your friend.

Junpei

You become his rival. I mean, are you serious? He has to deal with Makoto/Kotone and now he has you showing up being all cool and good looking. How is he supposed to be cool and show off now?

Very pouty as he talks about your stupid attitude, the stupid smile on your face, your stupid eyes lighting up when you've done something.

Yells when he realizes his feelings for you. Because, come on! Why does he have to have feelings for someone like you?! No way you'd like him back or feel anything for him. God, he hopes something ends him before he has to face you again and act like everything is cool.

Yosuke

Fully believes you two are just good friends. He finds you cool and strong. And yeah, he has eyes, of course he notices that you look good. And he's glad that you're his friend.

Yosuke notices Rise or some other person flirting with and is quick to come to your defense. Like you need someone that thirsty flirting with you. Come on, he'll take you out for ramen instead.

With Yosuke's luck, he's riding his bike when his mind starts to wander to you. He's hardly paying attention as he thinks of your eyes or smile or how he likes when you two are laughing together. He runs into a pole or something when he realizes what the hell is going on. Oh Yosuke is a mess after finding out that he has a crush on you. He teases Kanji about this same thing and now he likes you? He's screwed!

Taglist:

@abellahearts-blog

[ohanny]

so remember how i said i'd been having ideas about a pack orgy? well.

those ideas now under the cut:

(nothing graphic but subject matter by default is somewhat nsfw)

it all starts when jeff realizes his heat is coming and is miserable about it because a) he is jeff and b) it is a miserable experience. so to soothe his instincts thus also his stupid hormones and cramps, he orders alan to build them a big “nest” in the living room (covering the floor with mattresses, and pretty much every single pillow and blanket in the house) and invites over the entire pack so they can put on some studio ghibli movies, huddle close and jeff can feel comforted by the closeness of everyone he holds dear.

except jeff might have miscalculated his cycle and underestimated the effect having his entire pack so close might have on him. so barely two movies it becomes clear his heat is a lot less pre- and a lot more actually happening right now.

everyone is like “so uh, we should probably leave you two to it” but jeff who is pretty gone already, whines like a sad puppy. he needs his pack so why is his pack trying to abandon him? sensing his distress, alan is like “no, stay” and it’s not exactly an order but also kind of is because no one is allowed to make jeff sad. and it's not a big deal. because it’s pack. when your packmate is going through their heat or rut, you help out in whatever capacity you can. that’s just how it is.

so everyone is chill about the whole heat pheromone soup and whatever bodily reactions it might cause. they are fine more or less pretending to watch the movie while alan fucks and knots jeff right there in the middle of the nest. once jeff is stuffed full and calmed down, the fussing starts. as another omega, north would curl up as close to jeff as he could. kim would worry about water and snacks and “alan, you big oaf, don’t squeeze him so tight.” jeff would be high off the feeling of it, happily purring in alan’s arms and everyone would mirror his happiness.

well. not everyone. kenta - who babe invited and kim dragged over to “socialize” - is very much not okay. kenta is freaking out.

kenta’s experiences with pack dynamics have previously been limited to “do what father says to the best of your ability or else.” in tony’s mansion going through your cycles was seen as a huge inconvenience at best and something shameful at worst. pack was a matter of forced proximity versus genuine bonding and if you got close to someone, it would be used against you. he might have tried his best with the children to offer them some kind of security but after pete left all those years ago, no one bothered to do the same for him.

also, much to his horror kenta is hard. and he’s disgusted with himself because he's in a room full of people, it's because of the pack leader’s omega and on top of all that, jeff is someone he considers to be his brother. one of those things would be enough but all three? he is totally spiraling into shame and self-hatred, inching back until he’s about to fall off the mattress, stiff and scared.

in short, he is totally bringing the vibes down, the stench of his panic spiking when he makes accidental eye contact with alan who has been looking at him. alan sighs and kenta is pretty sure this is going to be it, tensing up even more in preparation of what's to come. instead of casting him out, alan utters out a very pointed “kim” shooting a significant look in kenta’s direction and kim looks over his shoulder and goes “oh shit, on it” and means it quite literally.

because he turns around, grabs and physically pulls kenta back in and then crawls on top of him, murmuring “it’s okay, feel that?” and takes kenta’s hand, guiding it between his own legs where he is also achingly hard. “see? me too. you’re good,” he tells kenta and noses around his neck, breathing him in, “you’re really good. just relax and let me take care of you, okay?” and how could kenta say no to that? being caged in like this by kim’s everything is turning his brain to mush. when kim presses down, he arches up and oh, fuck.

for a split second he forgets where he is but then babe - who is totally being the little spoon, all wrapped up in charlie as if he was the one in heat here because of course - stretches out a hand so he can scratch the top of kenta’s head and say he’s being silly, “this is pack.”

and north will take a brief break from jeff to ninja roll to rub his cheek on kenta’s shoulder, scent marking him, and then sonic will snort and just chomp on kenta’s bicep because he totally looks like a biter and kim will playfully growl at him in a “hey, no biting what’s mine” and swat sonic’s head to which sonic will respond by snapping his teeth at kim’s fingers. north would kick sonic’s shin and tell him to “stop biting other people’s people” and sonic would fling himself at north, the two of them getting tangled up and alan’s reflexes being the only thing saving jeff from accidentally getting elbowed in the face.

that will obviously jostle the knot still connecting them and jeff will whine, grinding back in a renewed surge of sheer need and alan lives to please. and let's not pretend gremlin charlie would not take advantage of all the fertile omega pheromones mixing with babe’s own scent to go full “is mama that desperate to be bred?” on babe. and if the whole mess of kenta, kim, north and sonic gets even messier and more tangled up as the night progresses, oh well. kim is horny and kenta clearly needs way more babying than jeff does. pack is pack after all.

[thelaughtercafe]

Sell Your SOUL*

Tea Type: Coffee

Potential Triggers: Mildly dubious consent for hypnosis

Pairing: Baggs/Reader

Length: 2.7+

Summary: You are a Human who opens an Empath clinic for monster kind; giving them a safe place to let out any emotions they may be feeling. Unlike the clinical and typically detached touch of therapists, you mirrored their emotions back at them, telling them what you felt, gently whenever possible and occasionally harshly if they refused to acknowledge their pain. Alphys finally allows you to meet Baggs, the one you know let them be released in the first place and you find yourself enraptured...he's just as curious about you. Oops. So much for keeping your distance. An interested doctor is a determined one. Hopefully it'll pay off.

After all...

Curiosity killed the cat, but satisfaction brought it back.

It didn't take him long to notice. You tried though.

God, did you try.

You did everything possible to avoid looking at him when he did it. Actually, it was more like you found an excuse to leave altogether the second it began happening.

Becoming friends with monsters was something that came easily to you, being an Empath. Feeling others' pains and helping them through it in any way you could was what you were used to, and loved doing and none needed it more than Monsters when they came to the Surface. While Humans didn’t even consider Empaths real, Monsters had informed you it was actually a well-known and documented form of healing magic that Human’s once possessed long ago. With their help and support you'd even managed to open your own little practice, mainly catering to Monsterkind. Toriel has been the gateway to meeting everyone, but they all had such pain hidden within that you tried to help with. General had been no exception, nor had Undyne, Asgore or Alphys. Alphys...was how you ended up meeting him and experiencing his ability first hand.

-----

Instantly a chill went up your spine. A subconscious warning from your intuition that you should be careful, despite Alphys' introduction.

"Th-This is Baggs! He's really only allowed here for research, a-a-and his home of course, which is w-why you've never met him before on our outings, but t-truth be told, I'd say he spends more time here than home. Always hard at w-work on some e-e-experiment."

Her voice was light and chipper, but you'd come to know her well enough to see the signs of discomfort, the slight tremble of her voice, the stutter that slipped out here and there, and, perhaps most notably, the way she was very carefully avoiding looking Baggs in the eye, despite the skeleton looking directly at her

"I'll l-leave you two to get acquainted and make some tea and snacks alright? I'll be j-j-just in the other room!"

A warning for him and a reassurance for you.

Ouch.

You winced at the literal sting that went to your SOUL, quick and barely there as you pasted on a smile and nodded at her.

"Sure thing, Alph. I'm sure we'll be fine. I'm not worried."

She smiled despite it trembling at the edges and you felt her relax some before she was gone in a swish of fabric.

"not worried? heh. that's cute, for someone who hasn't deigned to meet my gaze yet. scared, little human?"

You weren't sure what you expected his voice to sound like but it certainly wasn't that. Dark, inviting, damn near on the cusp of being outright seductive while somehow still emanating danger.

You shivered and he snickered again.

You swallowed hard, and then you met his gaze, pushing through the shivers you'd just gotten and instead focusing on the pain you felt coming off of him in waves.

"Actually, I was just waiting for you to introduce yourself. I guess I should've gone first though, huh? Sorry. I'm pretty shy on first meetings, the lack of eye contact has to do with that, not because of what you did. If I was scared I wouldn't be here at all."

His expression didn't change but you felt how he was slightly taken aback, then the apprehension and finally the slight twinge of mischievous glee just beneath the surface.

You withdrew your Empathy just a tad. You didn't like going deep into what everyone was feeling without their permission, but you'd accidentally let your guard go up thanks to nervousness.

His eyes were just as pretty as you'd heard. Pink glowed vibrantly from his left eye as he drew closer, smile unflinching.

"you're certainly quite bold for a human. heh heh. or maybe just naive judging by that adorable blush on your cheeks."

You looked away briefly to try and collect yourself, huffing as you realized he was right. You were so focused on feeling your cheeks and calming yourself down you didn't even register your SOUL had been gently pulled from your chest until its purple glow was in front of you.

"hm. that explains it then. but what's-"

His browbones went down in concentration and confusion as he attempted to reach for your SOUL but you were already reacting, swiftly pulling it back into your chest protectively.

"No! I-please. Don't."

His once mildly friendly demeanor had turned to full on mistrust and you could see it from the blue starting to swirl in his left eye socket without any need for your Empathy.

"what are you hiding, little human?"

You merely shook your head, retreating slowly towards the door but you yelped as it abruptly closed without any input that you could see, whirling to see it slam.

You heard a whistle and when you jerked back, Baggs waved the remote with an eerie grin.

Oh, how the tables had turned.

"No offense, sir, but my SOUL isn't any of your business."

His smile widened, yet somehow he only seemed more menacing despite the even, soothing steps he took towards you. They echoed, perfectly in sync and never faltering. His tone sounded genuine but you could feel the underlying condescension and mocking.

"well that's not very nice of you, now is it? i thought you wanted to be friends. i'm merely curious. perhaps i can even help "

You gasped as your back hit the door and he easily caught your chin between his phalanges, and tilted your head to make you look at him, blue and pinknow both swirling evidently in his left eye. his voice was a purr.

"and please, do call me baggs. i much prefer to be referred to with the appropriate amount of reverence when that name is used, and i’ve no doubt you will use it…but not quite yet."

You felt...oddly heavy and the urge to squirm and shiver was palpable. What was happening? You knew you needed to look away, you had to, or else he was going to-

Well, what was the worst he could do? Alphys was just in the other room after all. She'd hear you if anything bad happened. Besides, Baggs was nice. He was handsome. He just wanted to help.

Why were you being so resistant again?

Resistant? Now why would you do that? Baggs was your friend. Don't you confide in your friends?

You searched for something, anything.

Grasped, struggled, for something to lock on to.

Something to feel-

Pure, sadistic, addictive, control

You awoke out of your trance with a gasp violently breaking away from Baggs' grip on your chin before cradling your head, hands shaking, eyes slammed shut and face turned away.

"Don't do that a-again."

You chattered a little, still shivering from the aftershocks of ecstacy forced into you. At least he hadn’t forced you to do anything.

"guess everyone is scared of something after all, hm? pity. i think you're cute when you're all helpless like that, you know. even scared as you are now you're adorable."

Your face lit in flame and the words were the spark you needed to lunge for the door again with a gasp, suddenly recalling the manual switch on the side and nearly bolting out in your haste.

When did you forget? Just how long had he been in your head?

Baggs' alluring laughter followed you all the way to the exit, as did his final words to you.

"see you soon, little human."

-----

Despite your...intense first meeting he hadn't made any effort to antagonize you since when you began seeing him again. He acted as if nothing had happened in fact, merely smiling your way and returning to chatting with Toriel nearby as if you'd had a normal meeting.

Alphys, the only other person who knew vaguely what had happened, as she’d ran out after you, merely sighed.

"A word of advice from someone who's k-known him and worked with him. Don't let him get to you. Or at least, don't let h-h-him know he's g-gotten to you. And...try not to let him do it a-again. It'll just-"

Her voice had quieted conspiratorially with every sentence but she was cut off as familiar bony arms latched around both of your shoulders.

"It'll just what, al?"

His voice was bright but you felt the anger ebbing off him in waves and Alphys abruptly smiled shakily, turning to him in an attempt to not seem afraid.

"you wouldn't happen to be talking about me would ya? haven't ya ever heard-"

"Actually, sounds to me like you misunderstood. You're not interesting enough to warrant talking about Baggs, hate to break it to you. We were talking about a game character. Jeez, are you always so self-centered~?"

Your tone was teasing but your light glare of warning for him trying to frighten Alphys into silence was evident. He didn't seem concerned.

"with a face this handsome? can ya really blame me? anyway, what game? sounds fun."

Alphys was sweating nervously, staring at you wide-eyed but you were quick on your feet.

"Nathan Prescott from Life is Strange. It's choice based, so it's important to not let him know he gets to you or frightens you when he defaces your room in game with a threat. After all, what good is a threat if you don't let yourself be affected by it?"

His eyes lit up then, and you swore you saw his swirl start up, along with the growl that left his lips but Alphys distracted you both by pulling you away.

"Speaking of, I just remembered! We forgot to save! Come on, before Undyne changes the game without realizing!"

You were so proud of her for not stuttering that you missed the swirling eyes following your exit, before he looked down at the object clutched in his digits.

Your phone was held in his grasp, his grin widening as he noticed you didn't have a password.

silly girl.

-----

It didn't take you long to realize your phone was missing, and you told Alphys to go on ahead, and that you'd hang with her later on in the week. Papyrus' car was gone by the time you made it back so he must've gone to drop Toriel and Frisk back home Of course it'd started raining so you were damn near soaked as you knocked.

A few moments later the door opened to a surprised, and then amused Baggs.

"back so soon? told you I was irresistible."

You shook your head, shivering a bit more intensely, making Baggs' eyes immediately scan your body before he grew business-like and moved to walk away.

"come inside, i will make you something warm and then you may take a hot shower. i shall lend you some of my clothes so you do not get sick."

You blinked and then hesitantly entered and nodded, just as you sneezed. Better trust him than get sick right? He was a doctor. He'd been bearable lately; maybe your first meeting had just been a test and you'd passed?

By the time you reached the kitchen he was already setting down a steaming mug in front of you.

"i'll go and get my clothes together. sit tight, and be sure to drink that entirely. it would be a pity if your stubbornness made you ill."

You watched him turn and leave before looking down at the drink in your hands, contemplative. A sip confirmed it was tea, sweet, somehow just as you took it. Paps must've told him about how you always had a mug in your hand. The slight tingle as it went down your throat confirmed it must've been a tea infused with monster magic, which you attributed to be the reason for the extra sweet aftertaste as well. You continued to drink as you let your thoughts take you.

Perhaps General had been right. He'd sensed your nervousness when you'd next seen Baggs while baking cookies with him and had reassured you that his brother was just untrusting of people he didn't know but would warm quickly. Maybe you'd been wrong to be so scared. The propaganda was everywhere; warning of his danger and perhaps you'd taken some of it in subconsciously.

You stifled a yawn and inhaled sharply as when you went to stand and move you swayed; making you grip the table tightly. Familiar fear rushed to the forefront of your mine, one you were used to having around Humans but never with monsters. No. He couldn't have-

"you alright there pet? you're looking a little pale."

His worry was evident and you couldn't help the slight tone of accusation as you sluggishly looked towards him, still not able to move, even as a pleasant shiver shot down your spine at the new nickname..

"What was in that tea?"

He blinked, before a slow smile broke across his face and he casually strode over.

"just a little something to calm you down. the warmth will spread through your system faster if you're calm."

"Why didn't you tell me first then? Or better yet ask? You have to know how this makes you look."

Fuck. Your words were slurring a little, your lips tingling in an almost numb, but not quite way. Everything felt so…hazy.

"how what looks? Giving my shivering friend a warm drink and tucking her into bed, so I know she's safe? it's not as if I drugged you. even small doses of my magic can help soothe. I suppose I overestimated how much you could take, human."

He chuckled, his amusement evident, but you swore you detected worry in his eyes.

"i doubt you can take a shower in this state. come. i'll give you my clothes, leave you to change and then get you settled."

"But- I have to go home."

You tried to protest, struggling to think clearly.

"well, I'm not letting you leave in this state. i'd walk you home if I could but...heh. pretty sure my bro would lose it if i left and he found out later I played hooky. best give in."

You frowned at that, glaring at him as you made to move towards the door.

"Good thing it's not your choice then-"

You were cut off as you were whirled to face him when he grabbed your arm, your equilibrium way off as you struggled to focus on the skeleton in front of you. By the time you realized you were looking directly into his eyes it was too late. That feeling from last time washed over you, blue joining the magenta and spiraling outward. You couldn't deny you felt oddly...safe, and the feeling of his phalanges carding through your hair as you slumped into him was nice.

Baggs is safe, Baggs won't hurt me. Why...am I so tired?

"that's it, good girl. doesn't it feel nicer when you give in?"

Feels...nice. Sleepy. Safe.

You nodded weakly, your filter which would typically make you deny on instinct completely gone. You blushed at your admission and felt Baggs chuckle beside your ear.

"you really do fall quickly for me. how curious. come, let's get you into bed, hm?"

You felt yourself moving and when you all but crumbled into the bed after quickly changing into clothes you didn't bother looking at, you were out like a light to the soothing feeling of bone carding through your hair.

You didn't even hear his parting words before slipping off into unconsciousness.

"what was that you said? what good is a threat if you don't let yourself be affected by it? i think you're right, pet. actions speak louder than words, wasn't that the analogy?"

-----

A/N: There's the first chapter, finally out into the world! So, funnily enough; I've had this fic near done for 2 years now, but just been petrified to publish it for some reason. I think I was panicking over not nailing Baggs as a character well enough, in particular, as well as the way he speaks. Still, I'm glad it's out there now and I can start working on the second chapter- I really hope you all enjoy it!

Please do tell me what you thought; it keeps me writing and motivated as an author!

This fic and also be found at https://archiveofourown.org/works/47766418/chapters/120411676

The amazing (and flustering) Megalosomnia belongs to @megalommi! Please go and shower her in love and adoration <3 This fic would not exist without her!

This is a fic set after Megalosomnia's characters have reached the surface. It's very much non-canon! I don't even believe the creator has brainstormed this portion yet so this is all just me spitballing and having fun with it!

[suzukiblu]

I just wanted to say, yesterday I sat down and binge-read all your Timkon fics, as well as most of the WIPS, and I BADLY want to write some now. I've never really written Tim, tho, since I'm more used to writing Jason. Do you have any tips, or bits of Tim and Kon characterization you consider especially important? (The WIP I've made on my head, if it helps, is (Daemon AU) comics!Tim ends up on Young Justice!Cartoon universe, and he's very, very weirded out by how different Kon is to Conner, and very pissed off that this Conner gets a Daemon while his Kon doesn't have one.)

tbh it kinda depends on where you're trying to go with the fic idea, I'd say? Also why Conner DOES have a daemon and Kon doesn't, probably. Also-also, does Conner even actually have a daemon or is Tim just confused about Wolf or something.

Generally speaking, though, the thesis of Tim is that he is a ride-or-die guy who really fucking COMMITS when he makes a decision. Sure, he'll stalk Batman. Sure, he'll introduce himself to Nightwing and tell him he knows his secret identity. Sure, he'll put on the suit Jason died in to go save Batman and Nightwing from their own stupid selves. Sure, he'll be Batman's emotional support sidekick and lead Young Justice and the Teen Titans and try to clone his dead best friend and run around the planet solo to save Bruce from the timestream. Why not! SOMEBODY'S gotta do it!!

"Somebody's gotta do it" is a lot of Tim's motivation, from what I can tell, haha. He also comparmentalizes really well, is a very talented and skilled detective as his defining Robin skill, uses a bo staff as his signature weapon after convincing Lady Shiva to train him and was the dude who was smart enough to add pants to the Robin suit, and one of his more iconic lines is I think Cassie going, "you lied to Starfire?" and him answering, "I lie to Batman". Which he does. Frequently. Frequently and a LOT-ly. To be fair, Bruce is also a fucking liar, so he deserves it. Tim, however, actually has friends he will ADMIT are his friends without having to be waterboarded into it during an active apocalypse-level crisis.

The boy has no chill. He DISGUISES his lack of chill, but it is fucking nonexistent and the ONLY reason he looks "reasonable" is because his besties are the teen idol superclone with limited life experience and Stephanie "welp my dad's gone supervillain so I'm gonna go kick him in the dick with my intermediate gymnastics" Brown. And then there's Cassie "I'm just gonna ask Zeus for superpowers, natch" Sandsmark.

Also Bart. Also Bart is a thing. Bart is SO MUCH a thing.

So yeah, Tim is a full-stop no-holds-barred insane person, he's just also a better liar than any of his friends. Like so, so much better. AT LEAST THEY HAVE SUPERPOWERS, TIM. AT LEAST THEY'VE GOT THAT. He figured out Bruce's secret identity at NINE 'cuz he went to the circus as a toddler and Dick Grayson's flips were just that sick, and then just didn't tell anybody for FOUR FUCKING YEARS. Four fucking YEARS!! ACTUAL FUCKING YEARS. He just didn't think it was relevant, I guess?!!? So instead he just stalked them with his camera and took cool pics. So many pics. So, so many pics. And he skateboards.

Also he and Kon fucking could NOT stand each other at first because Kon was used to being a solo act and didn't want to answer to anyone else and Tim lacked the ability to convince him to listen to him and they just had VERY different personalities and priorities, and also for a little while in there Match was fucking shit up by pretending to BE Kon, and frankly it's a fucking miracle Tim and Kon didn't kill each other before they ever got to be Titans together, the way they totally failed to get along for the first YJ run.

Seriously, I think they actually had a literal fucking fistfight on Apokolips once, I think that ACTUALLY happened. In the middle of a literal WAR that happened. Tim. Tim, you KNOW better, buddy.

[dullgecko]

i think fig is the absolute last person to realize theyre not a girl. its not that the closet is glass its that they think they are frolicking in a field, closet? yeah im gay what about it? everyone knows?, everyone sees that they are trans in some way and just. assumes they know. and will talk about it when they want to. or that they know but are just keeping it to themselves yk. that they dont really mind the she/her pronouns enough to come out.

i think gilear is the first to notice, not in a ‘i think my child is trans way’ he just slowly (accidentally) starts calling them child instead of daughter and stops using figueroth and instead uses just fig. fig themself doesnt notice one bit and neither does gilear tbh, but at some point he is exclusively using gender nuetral terms for them and it feels a lot more normal than using feminine terms so he sticks with that

the bad kids all notice. gorgug considers reaching out when he first starts thinking about gender stuff, to ask for advice about how theyre so unbothered by it, but maybe hes misreading them and its not being unbothered but actually just not being ready to talk about it so he goes to kristen instead

sometimes kristen and gorgug will both talk to jawbone about gender things, and he doesnt really have personal experience but he has enough second-hand experience to help, at one point he asks them why fig doesnt talk to him about it — “does fig talk to you guys?” “no? i think they talk to gilear about gender stuff, he always seems up to date on it. they havent come out ?? so weve just been quiet about it” jawbone tries to drop hints and fig is completely oblivious (“so, fig, i heard theres this educational event for parents of gender-questioning and trans kids. im planning on going. do you think i should invite gilear?” “oh yeah that would probably be great for working with kids! for his job! as the assistant principal! oh or do you mean for fabian? theres definitely something goin on with fabian. i dont think fabian knows he has gender baggage yet?” she has NO idea save her)

adaine, riz and fabian have no clue what to do so they just dont really mention it. adaine has seen a prophetic vision that just happened to have fig with an ‘all pronouns’ pin, but like, you dont just mention that to someone ?? fabian fully doesnt say anything about it, riz forced himself to not investigate anything because its none of his business but ooooo he wanted to. he really wanted to. then again he would fail miserably at clocking non-goblinoids on trans stuff anyways because there is simply no way that goblins have anywhere close to similar gender structures to humanoid races

ayda is chilling with it, she may be a lesbian but she really couldnt care less what gender fig turned out as. i think eventually adaine confides with ayda about her vision and ayda just asks fig what pronouns theyd like to go by, fig is absolutely flabbergasted when they realize they have to think about it for multiple seconds before realizing that they really dont mind any of them. they decide this is most definitely not a trans thing, just a ‘i dont really mind 🤷 ill just use she/her since its what everyone sees me as anyways! surely everyone feels this same way!’

ayda prompty forces her to talk to kristen and gorgug about it and after doing so lots and lots they realize, finally, that theyre genderfluid. this takes time to sink in tbh, i dont think fig would just be okay im trans time to move on, and i think they would take every step in their transition really slowly actually. they find it lots of fun though!

everyone is pretty surprised to know fig didnt know they were trans, but coming out is so easy when 1 your friends are awesome and 2 you say “im genderfluid” and everyone says “oh you finally figured it out!” so everything falls in place very seamlessly

Gotta love a good trans bad kid headcannon. A+

[kcscribbler]

Seven Sentence Sunday

Tagged by the ever-early @elodiah.

I'm still fiddling with a few WIPs right now and won't be online a lot of the week, so instead have the scene I cut from a recent chapter. I posted bits of it here before and eventually decided to cut it completely. Hope that's okay. 😅

--SOME HOURS LATER--

A warm hand on his brow is what wakes him however long it is later, startling him out of what feels like a remarkably painless sleep, all things considered.

He is not destined for godly or mortal paradise, and this surely cannot be Hel?

Mobius makes a vaguely surprised noise when he realizes Loki’s eyes are open. “Hey, there you are.”

His own eyes are dark-shadowed, pinched at the corners as they always are when he has a headache, but he seems much calmer than Loki remembers last seeing him. And looks utterly exhausted. His hair is sticking up everywhere, as if he’s been dragging his hands through it repeatedly.

“Are you really awake this time?”

Loki blinks for a few seconds, trying to sort through the confused muddle of his last recollection, before nodding somewhat uncertainly.

Mobius chuckles, and reaches somewhere beyond Loki’s vision, bringing back a plastic bottle of water and uncapping it. “Go slow,” he warns, slipping a hand behind Loki’s neck to assist with a better angle.

Cool and refreshing, the water is most welcome. It serves to slowly wash back what Loki now realizes must have been a very near-death experience, if his memories are accurate. The acrid bite of the cursed dagger seems to have vanished, as it should have within these walls and the cast Runes they hold; and while the wound is no longer radiating such agony as he last remembers, it is very much still in existence, that much is clear.

Even the small effort of drinking seems to sap the rest of his energy, however, and it is with great struggle that he forces his eyes open again, not willing to fall back into that darkness without first ascertaining their safety. He appears to be lying semi-sprawled on the ground, like a marionette with its strings cut. A downy pillow rests under his head, and he is covered with what feels like half a dozen coverings – but that is definitely the hard, chilled stone floor under him.

Oh. Yes, good. Mobius had understood Loki’s basically non-existent directions, and had opened a Door directly beneath them to drop them into relative safety in the Citadel. It would have been a bit of a tumble, but certainly better than remaining where they were. Loki spares a brief moment to be impressed that Mobius had figured it out quickly enough to keep him from exsanguination, but that full story will likely need to wait.

Mobius puts a hand on his shoulder, as if reading his confusion on his face. “I assume we’re safe, for now,” he reassures, calm and soothing. “And do I have a load of questions for you about this place! When you’re feeling better, anyway.”

“…Questions?”

“They can wait. You need rest.”

Loki shifts a bit against the cold floor, and immediately is informed by his own physiology of just how not healed he is. Mobius’ face twists in sympathy. “You’re doing a lot better than you were yesterday, but it’s not gonna be a fun recovery, I'm guessing. ‘Specially without magic."

“If this is a lot better,” Loki rasps, breathing heavily, “then I shudder to think of the previous state.”

Mobius worries at a little string fraying on one of the blankets. “You’re not the only one,” he finally says. “I was sure Valhalla was putting another place setting on that long table.”

Loki reaches up to place an unsteady hand on his, noting the absence of the ring which had done its job perhaps a little too well. “I’m sorry,” he whispers.

“You should be,” Mobius retorts, but he turns his hand to lace their fingers tightly. “Oldest trick in the book, and you fell right for it. Damn it, Loki.”

“Forgive me if I find it rather difficult to focus on myself when there is a lesser variant of me with a blade at your throat.” Mobius snorts, amused despite himself at the designation. Loki exhales in a pained grunt. “Might we adjourn to something softer than the floor?”

“I think so, yeah. If you can make it upright for a few seconds, I can use the momentum to get you settled. I’ll get you something to drink with sugar in it, too. Even if your magic kicks back in, it isn’t gonna fix blood loss. You really need a doctor.”

“I would like to try to heal myself first, if you’d be so kind as to assist.”

Mobius nods and gets to one knee beside what Loki now realizes is a makeshift pallet on the floor; and no wonder, since Mobius could never have gotten him up alone. The runes hidden in the walls were just enough to cancel out the curse from the blade, though it does not feel as if his magic is even close to returning. Perhaps assisting a bit with healing, but nothing more.

Brows drawn with worry, Mobius locks one hand around Loki’s and firmly grasps a bony elbow with the other hand. “Ready?” he asks.

Loki nods, braces himself with opposite hand against the floor, and clenches his jaw to prevent a shout of pain when he pushes off, hauled to his feet and kept there with remarkable strength given that it takes a moment for him to find his footing. It is only a few meters to the bed, but it might well have been light-years, for as much as he is exhausted again, limp and breathing heavily, when they finally reach it.

Mobius fusses for a few minutes with the pillows, carefully arranging them so Loki can sleep on his uninjured side instead of his back, facing the middle of the bed. A glass of some sweet-smelling fruit juice is held to Loki’s lips, and then set on the table after he drinks from it. Mobius then retrieves the blankets from the floor, arranging and rearranging them until Loki, already half-asleep again, finally drags his eyes open and catches his wrist mid-action.

“What is it? What do you need?”

“You,” Loki whispers. “I need you safe, and I need you to rest. Please.”

It is telling that he gets no argument against the latter. Mobius just nods, and then after a moment of hesitation slips off his shoes and settles somewhat awkwardly on the other half of the not-exactly-oversized bed. Loki watches through half-closed lids as he fidgets with the unfamiliar sleeves of the pajamas. Discovered prowling around, no doubt, while Loki slept. He turns up the cuffs of the simple brown top, and then unrolls them again. And again. And again.

His hands are shaking.

“Are you all right?” Loki asks.

Mobius immediately stops and then squirrels under the sheet and quilt, offering what Loki can immediately tell is a forced smile as he settles in, hands folded neatly over his chest. “Don’t you worry about me,” he says quietly.

Loki’s lips curve in a faint smile. “I have done nothing but that, these last months,” he admits. It is, perhaps, a little too honest, a little too fraught with pain, for right now. “With good reason, it would seem. I told you that you were too trusting.”

A faint snort, but Mobius seems to then relax and fall back into old bantering habits, exhaling in a gusty sigh. “Yeah, yeah. Rub it in.” He side-eyes Loki briefly, and despite the weight of these last months seems to silently agree that, and all its unspoken consequences, is a discussion for the morrow. Instead, he simply turns on his side to face Loki, watchful and silent.

Loki manages a shallow, measured exhale and inhale. Another, and then another, until the pain is bearable.

“Please tell me we’re not going to talk about things right now,” he then rasps.

A brief chuckle, even if it’s tinged with sadness. “Not unless you want to.”

“Actually, I do. But not – not until I can think clearly,” he says, a little more candid than he meant. He blinks a few times and allows the pain to settle, to become a Thing of the body, not the mind. He has had far worse, after all.

Mobius huffs what seems to be a sigh of relief. “Sounds like a plan.” He pats Loki’s shoulder and then turns to shut off the light.

Loki’s eyelids droop against his will, but he reaches out across the space, careful not to stretch too far, and settles for leaving his hand there as he loses the fight against sleep.

Tagging @lokimobius @doomed-spectacles @insert-witty-user-name-here @mirilyawrites @loki-is-my-kink-awakening

@in-my-loki-feels @andthekitchensinkao3 @mythical-magik @scifikimmi and @thosegayoldmen

Whatcha workin' on this week?

[sleepyficss]

lightbulb & paintbrush headcanons.

poly! lightbrush x reader

authors note:

two of my favourite ii characters, i couldnt help myself :]c. also, swearing is present, apologies if you don't like that ^^

- already, these two complement each other SO WELL. so, adding a third person? you're all full of joy and whimsy.

- if you were present in the first season of ii, you probably wouldn't get together with them until season two, or the very end of season one at the earliest.

- but, when you DO get together if you were present in season one, your relationship is a lot stronger from the start – a lot of shit happened, but you were all there to experience it together, and are able to be there for each other because of it.

- lightbulb is sort of the 'comedic relief' in a sense? she's always trying to lighten the mood, and is considerably better at comforting people.

- she's also very much an entertainer, a lot of dates, or just chill-around days, are planned by her. despite how it seems, lightbulb is very aware of 'the mood', and others emotions.

- it isn't uncommon for her to act oblivious to the sour mood in a room, but she's really just trying to lighten things up in her own way :)

- although, she does understand when it isn't appropriate to act as such. instead, she'll happily offer a listening ear, and physical touch, as a comforting gesture. she may even pull out a few ideas to help you if you're in a challenging situation; no promises that the ideas won't be a little odd, though!

- paintbrush definitely struggles more in the comforting department, as they tend to let their OWN emotions get in the way of things.

- especially if you're upset because of someone else, depending on the situation, paintbrush may just end up losing their own temper on your behalf. they just appreciate you a lot, and can't understand how another person would be willingly mean to you :(

- when they do lose their temper, its usually lightbulb trying to calm them down, but with you in the mix? they find your presence very grounding, and will calm down a lot quicker with both of you around.

- just put a hand on their shoulder, or wrap your fingers around their own – it offers as a little distraction to whatever set them off.

- considering that paintbrush feels their emotions very strongly, not just their frustration or anger, they become VERY easy to fluster.

- once they've started falling for you, they're gonna fall hard.

- lightbulb's a little better at hiding their swooning, and instead just comes off as a little blushy and awkward (but not in a bad way, she's just nervous and doesn't know how to deal with your love for her).

- further into the relationship, though, lightbulb gets a grip and becomes a LOT more confident in their flirting, finding it silly when they're able to make you flustered.

- paintbrush still blushes easily, but will still attempt to make moves on you (holding your hand, any sort of kissing, physical touch, etc) while being a nervous wreck.

- but!! dates between the three of you are always so sweet.

- the number of times you've made cookies together is purely uncountable – but it's a fun activity, and you get a yummy treat afterwards.

- paintbrush and you usually only eat one or two cookies, lightbulb steals the rest.

- the three of you going outside after dark isn't uncommon, where you bring a blanket to lay upon the ground, just to sit on and stare at the stars.

- sometimes, you'll all just sit there in silence, enjoying each others presence, or quietly talking about anything and everything.

- there have been plenty of times where those talks have become serious, ending in soft cuddles and words of comfort to each other.

- there are also times where you're all in a silly mood, and end up being yelled at by someone trying to sleep, for laughing too loud, or playfully yelling at each other.

- you and paintbrush won't ever forget the pain you felt in your stomachs from laughing too hard as lightbulb attempted to stand up and act something out, only to trip and go falling down the hill. all you could see was the light emanating from her growing smaller and smaller until she reached the bottom.

- speaking of her light, it isn't noticeable during the day, but when all three of you have retreated to your bedroom, and are snuggling under the covers, lightbulb has the slightest bit of light constantly glowing from her.

- it isn't something she can turn off either, its just the built-up electricity within her, always running through her body.

- she's like your own personal, cuddly nightlight.

- none of you have set positions when sleeping in bed, either. half the time, you wake up in different positions anyways.

- lightbulb wants to be touching at least one of you all night, usually with as much of her body as she can.

- whether its you or paintbrush, she'll have an arm wrapped around you, a leg wedged between yours, and her body pressed flush against yours.

- paintbrush will usually just have an arm around your body, or a foot lightly brushing against yours.

- lightbulb is always knocked out the minute she's comfortable though, lightly snoring away.

- it takes paintbrush a while longer though, and you often find yourself talking to them quietly, tiredly muttering about your days to each other until one of you falls asleep first.

- paintbrush may prefer having you directly next to them sometimes because of this, as they like to tiredly stare into your eyes as an sloppy smile rests on your face, listening to paintbrush's account of their day.

- they like when you unconsciously hold their hand and play with their fingers in you sleepy state, eventually dropping both your hands as sleep overtakes you.

- you'll be listening to paintbrush mid sentence, start mumbling, and you're like, "what was that? you were too quiet – oh." and they've fallen asleep with their fingers tucked against yours.

- the next morning always kills you, though. as much as you love her, lightbulb is WAY too early of a riser for both you and paintbrush.

- half the time, shes jumped out of bed and opened the curtains while you and paintbrush are still groaning under the covers.

- and don't forget!! being in a relationship with these two, means coparenting their favourite crab – baxter!!

- sometimes lightbulb wants to bring him into bed with you all, but you have to remind her that he'd probably get squished in your sleep, considering how much you all move around.

- baxter does make an appearance in a lot of your dates though, remember to keep a constant eye out for him so you don't trip over him!

- you do love him, though – he's too cute not to.

- but he likes to interrupt your personal time with paintbrush and lightbulb at times, where you and paintbrush want to kick him out of the room, but lightbulb gets distracted and goes off to play with him instead.

- you all still love each other so, so much though <3

- i might have to make more headcanons of these two, i still have so much to talk about!! especially about your relationship DURING the contests >:)