#but in the meantime im making that everyone's problem so. sorry

[mrs-mikko-rantanen]

bitch i really hope u got this. i’m sending luv and care your way. don’t die<3

Bitch this is no joke the highlight of my day ily

[cupidspup]

I had an anonymous person ask me some questions about pacifiers, how to get then discreetly and stuff so here's my answer!! :D

Hi! Firstly I wanna say I really admire you asking around for advice and good job for that it's very brave! ໒꒰ྀིᵔ ᵕ ᵔ ꒱ྀི১ I'd like to say that we as the agere community are very focused on educating others but are also known to take care of others in the community and it makes me so happy that you trust me to help educate you! And to everyone who sees this yes, I am more than willing to answer any questions you may have :> this is my personal blog and safe space but I love chatting and I love helping others too! (Just know if it's advice or questions I'll answer when I do have energy :3) As a person whos nuerodivergent and has social/general anxiety i know it can be really hard and scary to do things! anywho! I'm real happy you asked and I'm happy to answer!

Yes, I do use a pacifier! I actually have a little collection if anyone ever wants to see hehehe૮( ˃ ꒳ ˂)ა anywho! Yes it is genuinely comforting and soothing to me! I usually regress between the ages of 0-6 but usually I'm very very small. I also tend to want a reason to be quiet and just use my random noises when im small too! It also makes me feel better about myself and my self esteem! I think I look cute with it and since I live with my partner/cg/little he thinks it's cute too ૮(˶˃ᆺ˂˶) The feeling of it generally feels full if that makes any sense? Everyone uses pacifiers for their own reasons but these are mine! If you're more of a chewer I definitely recommend getting a teething ring especially the ones with water in it (please be careful!!) It's a lil difficult to puncture a pacifier but not impossible either!

Still relating to pacifiers from above ^ please don't ever let anyone shame you out of having a pacifier or a teething ring or anything really, it hurts to know you have been ૮ ◞ ﻌ ◟ ა if it soothes you and isn't a problem to anyone else then there's absolutely nothing wrong with it and at the end of the day, it's your regression not anyone else's. You don't owe anyone anything ever (of course basic mutual respect but still you know what I mean-) pacifiers and teething rings and such are all your choice! Never let that become someone else's choices for you!!

As for obtaining one!! A lot of places on instagram offer discreet packaging! I can recommend my favorite places to buy if you guys ever want recommendations!! But anywho!! When I was a minor living in an unsafe home I did one of two things: given the money to a trusted person and had them send it to their house or another person's house that I trusted OR bought it and sent it to a safe person's house! Of course I told the person what I was doing and I did it with their permission!! They would give it to me when we saw each other :3 please do not use pacifiers meant for real biological babies though!! They will hurt and possibly damage your teeth! If you do ever resort to that (which is highly not recommended) please use it very minimally, do not fall asleep with it and only use it for absolute emergencies. Same goes for other little gear such as sippy cups!

If you don't have a safe person you can tell and have some sort of situation worked out with them I am very very sorry and there isn't much I can do to help :< but!! What I can do is tell you what I did before I had any little gear! I would typically suck on the knuckle of my index finger! Just yknow, curl my finger and suck on that! Of course please don't do that too hard or bite it was only something to soothe and keep myself satisfied for the meantime! :]

That is all I can say for now! I hope everything I said cleared up stuff for you and I hope you can get into a better household soon!! I know it can be hard but know that your regression is a sacred thing, protect it and share it with people you trust 🩷 that I'd the best advice I can give you as an adult regressor (who has many regrets 💀)

With that said!

You are loved and you are cared for, you're always welcome on my blog :]

𓂋

- ꒰ა ♡ ໒꒱ Kewpie

[aita-blorbos]

AITA for just doing what makes me happy?

Okay so like, recently i (adultM) met up with my ex (adultM) after we hadn’t talked for like, a while. the last time we had spoken it hadnt been very good. we kinda left off in a bad place and he wanted to reconnect and make up and stuff, which was cool and I was totally down for! On a completely unrelated note, i have recently made a list of people that i want to kill at least once (you can kill people like, a bunch of times before they really die and even then they can be brought back, plus you can get more lives by killing other people so its really not a big deal IMO) and he’s on the list because he ignored me one time. i told him about it as a kind of warning so it wouldn’t be a surprise when i did end up killing him (which i was not planning to do during our meetup btw), which was really nice of me honestly, but he was upset about it, which was like, fair i guess, but it’s literally not really even about him because i have so many other people on that list. Some of them havent even done anything wrong, i just kinda wanna kill people. like it’s literally just a hobby of mine. he said that it was really messed up that i kill people for fun, but like, some of his friends have literally killed me multiple times so i dont see how its any different just because they were motivated by revenge or to get more hearts/lives. they were still killing someone for the sake of their own satisfaction. plus i dont really care if its messed up, i’m having fun and if other people have a problem with it then they can kill me themselves and get their hearts back. i don’t even have that many, like, i’m not particularly strong and ive lost nearly as many battles as ive won. It’s not like im a tyrant terrorizing those weaker than me or anything (which by the way is something that he knows lots about, he hasn’t exactly always been a saint), im literally just having fun, and to be honest i’m happier than ive ever been! but he kept talking about how ive ‘changed’ and how i ‘used to be happy’, which by the way is literally not true. the ‘me’ that he used to know was literally a paranoid wreck who couldnt go five minutes without questioning every single decision hed ever made. like yeah i was happy sometimes and don’t get me wrong i did love him and our other boyfriend a lot, but overall that was not a happy time for me. anyway then he got his friends to jump me and i died which was honestly really funny and awesome but also kinda makes him a hypocrite. like idk i just feel like he’s trying to claim some kind of moral high ground when literally everyone here sucks. So yeah AITA?

edit: thanks for all the responses weighing in on my situation! unfortunately i got bored waiting for people to respond and in the meantime i put a bomb inside of his house. so uh sorry to everyone who was telling me to be a better person

[pallases]

hi leigh!! i hope you're well :) saw your post with asks and decided i would combine lots of them lol so first thing is tell me abt whatever's bothering you!! i hope nothing's bothering you obv but still.

also i am asking you for book recs. i haven't been reading a lot of proper books lately so any recs are welcome but i kind of feel like some fantasy would do me good. but like good ones? The last couple of years i've been picking up some popular fantasy standalones hoping they feel like a fantasy book you read when you're twelve and they end up being the most mid thing i've ever read. like help. i'm planning to read some robin hobb books so hopefully they're good.

also i've started listening to mitski (talk about being late lol) and i'm really liking her songs i was wondering if you have any particular recs? Or any music recs? what've you been listening to?

sorry this ask is all over the place lol i guess i'm chatty today. i hope you're having an amazing day!! <3<333

ORLA!!!! i hope you are doing well too <3 one thing that is bothering me is school is starting again bc i have gotten virtually no break </3 also that apparently the english class i’m taking doesn’t have any required books i was looking forward to reading actual books not whatever mini readings ig they’re going to be giving us instead ☹️ also also that i did Not in fact get my license like planned this summer bc during the singular week i was home a bunch of stuff suddenly came up and it became no longer my priority and now i will need to renew my permit Again bc it expires in early september and im not going to be able to make it home before that so. <3

as for book recs!! i have tragically had the same problem lately re fantasy books and honestly mostly just books in general BUT i don’t know if you’ve read any ve schwab ive really loved what books of hers ive read. vicious was my favorite, but the monsters of verity duology better fits the “feels like a fantasy book you read when you’re twelve” vibe!

for non-fantasy recs if youre feeling poetry i reallyy liked margaret atwood’s morning in the burned house. also just finished hitchhiker’s guide to the galaxy which was v fun! got many laughs out of me, i did not however know before starting it that it’s a series so now idk how to proceed bc i only have the first book agdjfk

OH ALSO fantasy shoutout to strange the dreamer duology 🫶🏻🫶🏻 lovely writing style and world, fascinating antagonist, i was not a big fan of the romance but otherwise big rec on that. definitely not for everyone tho some ppl find the pacing too slow, i remember when i first read it i mentioned that in my review too that it took a bit for me to really get into although i personally wasn’t bored in the meantime like others, i was just chilling enjoying what it had to tell me abt everything

MITSKI RECS!! i love strawberry blond sorry for being basic. square too but specifically square solo piano version which they took off of spotify (idk what you’re listening to her on). because dreaming costs money my dear is also a veryyy hard-hitting one. fond of circle, a burning hill, goodbye my danish sweetheart, nobody, washing machine heart, and class of 2013 as well. that was a lot i will stop now 🫡 also must admit i am quite behind on mitski’s recent releases so i can’t speak for any of her newer albums/songs. except for working for the knife musically it doesn’t hit as much as other songs of hers for me but lyrically it makes me go crazy

as for random music recs my most recently liked songs are unsweetened lemonade by amélie farren, army dreamers by kate bush, numb little bug by em beihold, would that i by hozier, the milk carton by madilyn mei, and comme des enfants by cœur de pirate. i have not really been “listening” listening to anything lately! though that will change in a few days with wisdom saga >:)

— sleepover saturday sunday!

[hiddenjam]

Some help for my mom - UPDATED

Hello friends, you probably don’t know who I am since I haven’t been active here from years, and I rarely post anything, some of you even messaged me wondering if I was still alive, I'm so sorry if I ever worried anyone, I'm alive! I just don’t have time and motivation to be active these days, thanks a lot for you lovely persons who dmed me tho ♡ this and other reasons are why I regret letting my depression drown me for too long, because I’m feeling so tired right now, so lonely, but I’m also feeling desperate and helpless because I need your help. So my mom has been very sick from some time ago, but just recently, she got diagnosed with a brain tumor, and she needs a surgery urgently, like doctors gave her 2 months if we do nothing, and 1 has already passed, but the cost its high and I don't have enough money to help her.

I know I said before I was going to do commissions, but my time has been shortened since I also work long hours and taking care of my mom at the same time its really tiresome, physically and mentally, not that I complain in helping her tho. So maybe this year, hopefully I’ll make some progress with that. I'm sorry I'm rambling, I'm not very good with words, back at the matter… 

I’m feeling REALLY ashamed to be asking for help, but like I said Im feeling desperate to help my mom, I only live with her and I need her just like she needs me right now, she’s suffering a lot, and the feeling of helpless its horrible because I can’t help her like she needs to. 

So please, please, consider donate to make her surgery, she doesn’t have much time left, even if its a small donation, every cent no matter the amount its important to us, and it will help to do it as soon as possible. 

And if you can’t donate but still wants to help, then share this link to reach to others, really, anything right now its important to me, thank you for reading, and thanks a lot for your help.

Tbh I still don’t know everything about this tumor, but I shared more info and details in the fundraiser link, and even if you need a commission (I mean a drawing for a donation) you can dm me, I've never done a commission before, but I will try my best to do it, really by this point I’d do anything to help my mom. 

Thanks a lot and take care ♡ ♡ ♡ This is the donation page: https://gofund.me/347d39a2

EDIT: My mom survived the surgery with the help of everyone!! Thanks a LOT for all donations & shares! by changing the doctor we managed to give her a second chance in life 🥺 Also the tumor turned out to be benign!

Her doctor talked about her case on facebook !

SO GLAD we found him, the first doctor was charging us 22k while this doc charged us 10k (I put 3k from my saves) and it turned out all good! its amazing the improvement that my mom has shown ever since the 1st day of the surgery. And she's smiling 🥺❤️

Right now the only problem is the radiosurgery, and its another expense 😭 I dont know when this gonna end, but docs say hopefully is the last time, the probability is never 0 but she will need to be checked from time to time. In the meantime I will share the fundraiser for the radiosurgery, yeah I know, its shameless, but I really hope not to be in this position ever again after this. This time, Im no afraid of the outcome, I'm hopeful but need to be patient.

Once again, please, I need your help, I dont know If I should do another post about it, but for the moment I will just add it here in the ogpost: https://gofund.me/da136114

Once again thanks for your consideration <3

[boy-with-a-gun]

9/25/24

taking the kid out for hunting today. she should learn some self sufficiency while shes here. itll even out her using my resources, good for her health too. Shes still messed up i reckon, just hiding it from me because im a stranger. going out will be good for her

bike took us about three hours north, i remember some denser green there. Styx didnt talk but she was restless, didnt know if she was nervous or excited.

the spot had a copse of trees. some flowers too and thicker grass. hunting used to be harder but now everyone and everything is starving. the hunger draws animals out and at that point its a matter of waiting around and pulling a trigger.

We got off the bike and I showed her the gun.

'this is a bolt action rifle. less recoil. semi-automatic. single-shot.'

'it looks different than the one i saw in your basement'

'its a different gun.'

tried giving the rifle to her but she stepped back. 'i never held a gun before, can you just show me how to use it first?'

'youre just scared. it wont bite.'

'i dont want to shoot myself in the foot or something! whats your problem?'

'fine.'

had us sit down away from the copse. close enough to shoot down whatever would be dinner tonight, far enough to be able to teach styx.

'youre gonna go and forget everything you see in movies about guns. all of thats hollywood trash and none of its true, got it?'

she nods.

'dont point the barrel at anything you dont wanna kill. not at me. not at the ground. not at anything unless you got killer in your eyes.'

she nods.

'keep your finger off the trigger unless you wanna shoot. ammo is a luxury and im the lucky one who knew all this shit was gonna happen, so if you misfire and waste this shit, youre gonna pay.'

i mustve scared her or something cause she looked down and didnt even nod.

i demonstrated as i spoke. 'its not hard. aim as best you can and pull the trigger. pull the bolt back like you mean it so the old shell ejects and it loads up the new one. dont wast bullets. keep the safety whenever youre not shooting or im taking the thing.'

got into stance. '//'

she nods.

'we're gonna wait for something to come out and i'll show you all of that in action. then its gonna be your turn. once i add the scope'

she didnt look happy to hear that.

Took a while for anything to come out but not any longer than usual. had to tell styx to sit still and quit trying to talk to me when i said nothing to her in the first place.

'look. rabbit.'

rifle went off easy and styx gasped.

''s not a big deal, kid. run on up and grab it, would you?'

had to repeat myself cause she didnt seem to hear me the first time. attached the scope while she was gone and set it up for her.

her stance was good but her hands were shaking.

'you cant be doing that. youre gonna get yourself hurt.'

that seemed to make her snap. not even sure what she said cause her voice got high pitched and she started crying all mad. dont even know what i did wrong, but i put an end to it quick when she pulled the trigger and fired at the ground, not even looking through the scope and stumbling back instead.

she sat on the ground for a while to calm down. i packed up in the meantime.

'we should go back now, styx.'

'im sorry.'

'you've got issues.'

'im sorry.'

i just sighed and helped her up. 'dont know what got into you there. hopefully youre a better cook than you are a shooter.'

she wiped her nose and her face and tried to smile politely. 'uhm. yeah.'

ride back to the bunker was quiet.

[mastermunson86]

out of character: I don't mean to be rude about this at all but it kind of sucks coming here to rp with you and having to look at all your lovey posts with your girlfriend. I thought she was your gf in rl and idk maybe she is which is totally fine, its not my business. But finding out she's the character Eddie's gf/wife and that they are expecting a baby makes me feel all sorts of yucky inside when I come here to send dirty messages. I assumed the character Eddie was single and just having fun with each of his anons. Point is, I understand completely that it's a me problem and not a you problem. You should be able to run your blog however you want. But I guess I just wanted to say not to be surprised if Eddie starts getting less messages because not everyone is okay with the cheating aspect even if it isn't technically cheating. I think people come to character rp blogs to feel special and like maybe if the character was real that they would like them back or they would have a shot with them. So to have a character blog where they are openly in a relationship already seems kinda strange. But again, my problem not yours. This long ramble was basically just to say goodbye. You don't know who I am obviously but I felt I owed it to you to say it after everything.

Thanks for the good times Ed. Good luck with the marriage and the baby.

Im not really sure why this was necessary, I still rp and message everyone else like a “normal” role playing account would and yet no one has a problem with it because they get the attention they want/need. Secondly, I have a good amount of followers in which I receive asks and messages from and actually like my relationship regarding my partner (many of them follow and interact with her as they do with me). I’m sorry you feel this way however this message was completely unnecessary, no one is pushing this on you to say that you are at fault or that you can’t send me what you want wether it be a horny or random thought. At the end of the day, this is just an account on an app in which I run the way I choose too and no one is telling you that you have to like my way of doing things. Also, I really don’t appreciate how you threw this in my face as if I was supposed to get on my knees and beg for forgiveness but anyway in the meantime, have a good night.

[n1k1tty]

kiss me ! part 2

“hawaii!” niki yells, throwing as fist in the air as he enters the van “riki, it’s 3am in the morning, please shut up” jay retorts, going back to sleep as he leans on the window

as if it was almost planned, you and jake sat beside each other at the furthest seat. it was complicated, you didn’t know if you were comfortable or not, you felt tense, afraid of jake’s teasing if you touch him even the slightest. yet you also didn’t want to leave your seat.

you let out a huff, trying to find a position where you could comfortably sleep in. you were spooked at the sudden hand that leans your head on their shoulders “you can sleep on my shoulders, it’s alright” jake chuckles, already drifting to sleep the second after he did that “thanks” you mumble, easing into his warmth.

you laugh a little at his aching figure “this is funny to you? after i’ve been so kind to let you sleep on my shoulder?” he pouts “i deserve a long massage during our flight” he jokes, continuing to carry your bags.

dumbfounded by the fact that you stayed with him, giving him a glance filled with guilt “y/n seriously, i’m fine. it’ll go away sooner or later” he reassures you, his heart exploding at the sight of you with glimmering eyes, feeling the guilt you expressed them with.

“what do you wanna eat for breakfast?” you mumble, taking the luggage cart from his grasp. he laughs at your attempt to make him feel better “sorry? didnt quite hear that well” he teases, making you give him a glare, almost forgetting that he was ‘injured’ you raise your hand to almost give him a punch “good thing you’re hurting or i would’ve punched your ass back to australia” you roll your eyes “you heard what i said!” eyebrows frowning as you look away “alright alright, i’m fine with coffee really—” he lets out a breathy chuckle, dragging his feet as he follows you around “—nonsense! breakfast is important. don’t give me that type of bullshit sim” you cut him off, stopping by a little restaurant as you tell the other members to go ahead “im getting you pancakes. better finish it or you’re not living to see another day”

he laughs “this is quite a unique way to care for someone don’t you think” you roll your eyes "eat the damn pancakes sim jaeyun"

"yas ma'am"

--

after everyone had met up, you all started finding your seats. you were bewildered, somehow, because now you found yourself wanting to switch seats with sunghoon for obvious reasons. but of course, you --again, didn't have the guts to do so.

a few hours into the flight and a few glances from jake here and there, you received a message

jake :):

hey pretty girl, do me a favour and go to the washroom behind you

you:

and why exactly?

jake :):

no questions asked. i just miss you ;)

you swore you wanted to jump off the plane. pretty girl?! he misses me?!. you feel the heat creeping up in your face as you asked jungwon "hey, could you get up of a sec. i gotta go to the washroom" you whisper, mumbling a small 'thank you' before you walked to the washroom.

you felt a hand pull you "hey" he giggles, arms wrapped around your waist "you scared me! i thought i was getting abducted" you slap his shoulder. although you would be lying if you said you didn't want to just grab him and kiss him right at this moment.

he looked so good with his button up shirt, showing off his collar bones, neck wearing the beaded necklace you made for him during the summer and your birthstone necklace. his hair was messy, and you couldn't deny how hot he looked with his glasses on.

"you should consider buttoning up" you hesitantly say, looking anywhere but his eyes. of course he catches on to your intentions, but he felt like pissing you off "why? i'm showing off your necklace" he giggles "i even bought your birthstone" he grabs the necklace with his thumb, making you roll your eyes as you cross your arms, making sim jaeyun giggle.

he places his hand under your chin, finally letting you looking at him "switch seats with sunghoon please. i don't think i like the sight of you sleeping on jungwon's shoulders" now it was your time to piss him off.

"why?" you pout, "his shoulders are so comfortable, and we don't want your shoulders aching again now do we?" you give him a slight smile, well it wasn't like you weren't planning to switch with sunghoon way before the flight even started anyway.

jake rolls his eyes "that leaves you no choice--"

"can y'all hurry up? i'll switch with you y/n gosh! just let me pee!" sunghoon bangs on the door, making jake laugh "well that was easy"

--

oh how you regret changing seats.

because now you get to fully witness the flight attendants obviously flirting with him.

"good morning sir" she annoyingly giggles, biting her lip as she leans in way too close. jake leans back, letting out a small laugh out of politeness "hi, yeah i'd like..." he orders his food while you glare at the girl who's been displeasingly close to him "what can i get for you ma'am?"

"oh my girlfriend would like the same thing" jake interrupts, giving you a sly wink after placing his hand on top of yours. you let out a small scoff after seeing the disappointed look on the girl as she hands you the food. your skips a beat. girlfriend? you thought

now he was starting to piss you off. he was doing everything but ask you out. and with every ounce of pride you had in your soul, you hated to admit that you were starting to get really impatient. were you not obvious about your feelings? was the handmade necklace and the concern you have for him not obvious enough?

"ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Hawaii" the pilot announces, after you got your hand carry, you didn't even bother waiting for jake. immediately walking out of the plane, causing him to tilt his head out of confusion.

he didn't get a chance to talk to you, i mean, how could he when you would immediately start walking away from him whenever he tried to walk towards you.

as you sat beside jay in the tour bus, he gives you a weird look "why are you here" you give him a lost look "can i not...?" that's when he knew something happened between you and jake "y/n if this is because of jake--" you place your hand on his mouth, leaning way too close. but luck wasn't on your side today, because jake saw.

"shut up please! and yes! it is about him. so please spare me and let me sit here for the meantime" jay chuckles, "jake's going to kill me for this" he mumbles, leaning back to the chair "what?"

"nothing" he gives you a grin

--

after you guys arrived to jay's beach house you immediately grab your bag before jake could help you

"alright riki and sunoo are sharing a room, jungwon and heeseung are sharing, and...." jay looks at you, sunghoon and jake, not knowing what to do "you three figure it out. i'm just letting you know one gets to have their own room" jay starts to head to his own room, shrugging his shoulders as he walks past you with widened eyes.

"we already know what's about to happen. i'm getting my own room-"

"no!" you yell

"yes!" jake yells in unison,

"well......" sunghoon stood there, waiting for the both of you to talk "well, i just think i should get the room since you know-- i'm a girl and-- you and jake are best friends so you should be roommates" you explain, giving sunghoon an awkward smile "yeah sure whatever- ow!" jake hits sunghoon in the arm "you idiot! take the goddamn room!" jake grits through his teeth "you know what y/n! i change my mind. i uh, i think im going to take the room"

"why?!" you whisper with a harsh tone. poor sunghoon "IM GOING TO JERK OFF OR SOMETHING I DON'T KNOW" he yells, although he regrets it after the maids give him a weird look "ayo what?" heeseung peaks through the door "nothing! i didn't mean that. just --ugh! i'm heading out" he grabs his luggage, stomping through the hallways as he walks to the room. leaving you with jake.

--

you were about to have a mental breakdown "jay! you're seriously not helping me at all!" you give him a shove "ow! you need to control your strength sometimes! and i'm sorry okay? i just panicked, and i think you and jake being roommates wouldn't be a mistake. it's better to fix your problems instead of just sweeping it under the rug. you can't avoid him forever y/n" he was right. and you knew that. but you couldn't bring yourself to tell jake what was bothering you. even the thought of it was embarrassing, because what if he wasn't even intending to date you at all?

you walk back to the room, hesitating whether you should open it or not. but after hearing no noise, you open the door "AH OH MY GOD SORRY--" there you saw a shirtless jake, hair wet and his glasses having a few drops of water from his hair. he grabs your hand before you could walk out again "y/n, please talk to me" he places his hands on both sides of your shoulders "did i do something wrong? whatever it is, i'm really sorry" he panics, slightly pouting at the silent treatment you gave him "jake i-"

"dinners ready!" riki barges in, freezing at the sight of you two "oh- hey! riki, let's go!" you grab his arm, walking towards the dining room "please don't mention it" you whisper, sitting in between riki and jay.

jake later follows, now in his grey shirt and the checkered pajamas he wore earlier, he gives you a small smile before sitting next to heeseung.

"so, sunghoon. did you have fun?" heeseung teases

"shut up!"

--

"this wasn't going as planned anymore!" jake groans, he was currently in jay's room, ranting his frustrations out while jay listened. when jake had heard about the trip to hawaii, he originally planned to confess when you guys went to the party, it's not like the party had already happened, but it was already tomorrow "i already apologized, yet she still wouldn't speak"

"do you even know why she's mad?" jay asked, leaning on the bad with his arms as he watched jake pacing around his room "...no?"

"jake sim you idiot"

it was 1 am in the morning and you finally finished playing games with riki and heeseung. you were hesitating to open the door once again. afraid of letting the incident happen once more. you knock lightly, hoping that he was there and you could finally make up

but before you could open the door, jake already opened it. immediately embracing you "please talk to me" he whispers gently in your ear. you couldn't help but burst out crying, causing him to panic, he caresses your hair "let's go for a walk yeah?" he grabs your wrist, his touch so gentle as if you were fragile.

he wipes your tears as you walk along the shore "i missed you. you know?" he holds your hand as you both drag your feet along the sand. you hit him on his shoulder "ow!"

"that's what you get!" you sniffle, looking at the reflection of the moon on the sea "what did i do?" he chuckles, searching for your eyes. he tilts his head when you don't respond "hello?"

"cause! you always flirt with me, calling me your girlfriend and hugging me! i hate it! i hate it because my heart always skips a beat every time and i always expect you to ask me out soon yet you never do!" you yell, your skin was glowing under the moonlight. jake was in awe the moment he saw your glistening eyes that had tears threatening to fall.

he had the sudden urge to kiss you and tell you how he felt.

and he did. because jake was a man who never doubted his feelings when it came to you.

he pulls you by the waist, causing you to let out a yelp. his lips touches yours, and it stayed like that for a while, to make up for the moments he wasted without you this whole vacation. you wrap your hands around his neck, playing with his hair

"can i be your boyfriend?" he cheekily says, his smile making you smile as well "suck my ass. sim jaeyun. yes, i'd love for you to be my boyfriend"

"i'd gladly suck your a--"

"sim jaeyun!"

--

[bonus bcs i haven't posted in a while]

it was the morning of the party, you were in jake's arms "finally you're awake! good morning!" he excitedly says, peppering you with kisses "the guys are in the pool so get changed" he informs you, smacking your ass as soon as you got up "getting too comfortable for our first day aren't we?" you tilt your head, giving him a smirk "can't help it" he send a wink your way.

as soon as you got out in your swimsuit, jake's mouth drops "do a little turn for me" he smirks, twirling you around as he hypes you up "holy shit! i'm so lucky aren't i" he checks you out, earning a smack from you "ow! alright but i'm not letting them check you out like that! wear my shirt"

(he didn't let you go from the jacuzzi after heeseung hyped you up lol)

--

[party]

you told jake to go ahead, wanting to surprise him with the dress you bought.

after arriving to the party jake almost dropped the drink he had in his hand after he saw you. he was smiling so hard when the little girl put a Lei (flower neck lace) on you. he felt so proud when the other men at the party look at you giving him a hug

"that's right, she's mine" he thought

after you walked to wards him he grabs you by the waist "you look so pretty in red" he says, hugging you tightly "is that so?" you ask, giving him a chaste kiss on the lips, making him all giddy

--

part 1

taglist: @zylenes @hwalllllllelujah @theskzvibe

HI GUYS :D. i will be posting the visuals for this fic so pls wait :)

[redrobemerle]

actually on the topic of submas (sort of. tangentially.)

where did everyone get the idea that ingo hates volo from anyway? like it makes sense after the confrontation at spear pillar, if the protag ever told him what happened (particularly if you subscribe to the uncle/dad figure ingo headcanon) that hed have Issues w volo

but ive seen so many ppl be like "he mistrusts volo from the beginning" and yada yada yada

when the conversation in the highlands suggests nothing of the sort?

the japanese version of the game has him speak as politely/formally as usual

and the english, while it could be seen as rude out of context, in context really comes across as "im sorry i dont have information that you want, im gonna keep doing my job now"

direct quotes and how i, an autistic person who tends to speak a lot like ingo does, interpreted them:

"I have no cause to think the rift is to blame... but then again, I hardly remember a thing, so it's difficult to sat with certainty. I can't remember my own home, nor my family, if I had any... So you might do better to pose your questions to <Player>, I think, if it's to do with that rift."

"There's no proof that i fell from the rift, but my memorys been fucked up so who knows!" (i choose to believe he walked through a distortion, but didnt fall from the big rift. thats not the point of this post but its vaguely relevant) "we know for a fact that [protag] fell from the rift, so theyre more likely to know something than i do, assuming they dont also have memory loss from their commute here"

okay, pretty normal! he seems genuinely sorry that he cant give volo the answers he wants!

then volo talks abt the rift w the protag a bit and mentions his interest in myths and legends!! and then ingo says something else:

"I fervently hope you unravel this mystery, Volo. I'm sure it would ease people's fears over the frenzies of our nobles. And while you investigate, sir, I'll continue to prioritize the safety of the people living in this world."

alright, i could maybe see how, especially out of context, this could come across as kinda passive aggressive, but thats not how i read it at all! heres how i read it:

"i hope you figure out whats causing these problems in your studies. however, people still need to be protected and guided in the meantime, and that is more where my talents lie." like!! i viewed it far more as a genuine, if slightly blunt, statement!! theres not really any reason for ingo to be passive aggressive in this situation; he can recognize that different people have different strengths and weaknesses. volos strength is in research, ingos is in dealing with people. hes just stating what he sees as a fact.

tl;dr: im genuinely confused that people think ingo was showing discomfort with volo in the highlands conversation. in my opinion, he was just speaking in a politely logical way that is typically common in autistic people, particularly hyperlexic autistic people.

[calxide]

HELLOO!!!!!1!1!1!11 IT IS ME, THE ONE AND ONLY AIKO💗💗 anyways, i just wanna wish you a good summer vacay ahead!! but um- have u had an anon that like yknow send hate regarding any of ur genshin x reader posts?? cause ive currently had one :( SORRY IF IM SENDING NEGATIVE VIBES!! again i wish u a great vacay <<333

Hello, Aiko! Thanks for stopping by again. This might be long but here you go >.<

Well, I actually had one but that was when I was starting my journey in writing and that was a month ago. I wouldn't use the word hate on this problem since it's a strong word — they probably disliked the idea of having side pairings in smau, which I understand because that's simply their personal preference. But the thing is, if you don't like something, just ignore and scroll—don't read it and of course, don't send hate to the author. Although, I never really let myself be bothered by this again since it's only a small matter.

As for your issue, I'm not really sure about the whole story but first of all, I hope you don't feel discouraged about writing because of that — if you do, then I hope you feel encouraged to do so, again, soon. I personally think that having someone who sends hate is part of our journey, actually lol. I know, it sounds stupid, but you won't be able to avoid these problems. You can't please everyone, therefore, you can expect that someone out there might come after you and your works because they simply don't like it (unreasonable, right?). But like I said, never be discouraged just because someone had sent you a destructive criticism or whatever. Don't let someone who'll step as low as them destroy you as a writer, as a person.

If you did something wrong, you can apologize (and change for the better). Of course, that doesn't excuse their behavior of sending hate because that simply doesn't excuse it. We are human beings, we are bound to make mistakes because that's just who we are. If you didn't do anything wrong, you can ignore them and that might shut them up. If they still won't stop, you can turn off anonymous questions in the meantime. Make sure to try taking a break first to freshen up your mind so it won't fully destroy you.

Don't worry about sending negative vibes. I'm thankful that you've trusted me in this matter. Please don't hesitate to hit me up if you have any problems and I'll try my best to help as much as I can.

As for our readers out there, please do not send authors destructive criticism. We always appreciate constructive criticism, advice, and feedback, but please make sure to be nice, we are humans too. If ever we do something wrong, please point it out to us kindly and we'll make sure to get back to you as soon as we can.

I apologize for all the grammatical errors I've made in this post. Once again, thank you, and stay safe. Don't forget to drink water and take care of yourself! ♡

[motherjoel]

in case (spencer reid x reader)

summary: you and spencer are each others forever, and spencer vowed to make this christmas your best yet.

a/n: the yard sale scene is based off of that moment in the office between michael and holly lol, i just thought it was so cute. also i am just so excited for christmas even though its months away so im sorry in advance. let me know what yall think!

wc: 3.1k

-

The LaMontagne-Jareau household was having their annual yard sale and as they do every year, they invited the team to sell anything they didn’t want anymore. You and Spencer had just moved in together a few weeks ago after dating for a year and you definitely had some things that you could get rid of, so you jumped at the opportunity to clean house. As you were packing some of your knick knacks into boxes, you noticed your boyfriend sitting in front of your shared bookshelf, closely examining its contents and placing the books into two piles. His brow furrowed when he placed another book into the smaller of the two stacks. You set down the lamp you were holding and walked over to a frustrated Spencer.

“You know Spence, you really don’t have to get rid of any of your books. I promise, I don’t need the shelf space,” you chuckled before examining the piles.

“I know, I just feel bad that you can't put any of your books up there. Besides, I’ve read everything anyway,” he said with a frustrated sigh. You patted him on the back before sorting through his “sell” pile. Picking up one of the hardcover books, you noticed it was one of your favorites. 

“‘The Complete Tales and Poems of Edgar Allen Poe’? You were getting rid of this?” you asked in slight shock.

“Oops, wrong pile,” he remarked, softly taking the book from your hands. “You remember the first time we read this together?” he asked, flipping his fingers through the pages. 

“Um, of course. Last year, before we were an item,” you recalled. “I was at your apartment and we ordered a pizza and opened a bottle of wine, which you proceeded to spill all over me,” you laughed, Spencer blushing profusely at the memory.

“And you were wearing white…” he trailed off.

“And I was wearing white. I know you have an eidetic memory but this must be the dirty side of it because I know full well you saw my bra through that shirt,” you nudged him teasingly.

“Hey, why do you think I asked you out in the first place?” he jokingly asked. You nudged him again and laughed. 

“So I changed into your ‘I Heart Vegas’ t-shirt and your FBI sweats and made you read to me as an apology,” you smiled, recalling the memory that you held near and dear. 

“And you’ve never looked better,” he laughed, pecking your lips. 

You set the books down and left him to his sorting, returning to your own work. Once the two of you were ready to go, you hauled the few boxes into your car and made the drive to JJ’s.

-

“My favorite lovebirds are here!” Penelope shouted, standing up from her seat on the lawn next to Morgan and making her way over to you and Spence. You gave her a quick hug.

“Hey Pen! I’m surprised to see you here, I know you’re pretty sentimental when it comes to your things,” you asked as she began to help you carry your things onto the lawn.

“Yeah, I’ve had firsthand experience with that when I accidentally knocked over her llama mug. The thing shattered and she refused to call me ‘chocolate thunder’ for days” Derek chimed in, standing to help you with the boxes.

“Okay, in my defense, I like to keep my sacred things sacred. I didn’t want my poor llama to face such violence!” she yelled, and you all laughed. “But you’re right, I’m just here to count the money,” she confessed, and you nodded. 

You all chatted about your days as you unpacked your boxes, the rest of the team showing up in the meantime. As you unpacked, you came across your old neon sign that said “boss bitch,” and you couldn’t help but laugh, drawing the attention of your friends. 

“Damn Y/N, I never pegged you as someone who’d have a sign like that,” Emily said, walking over to get a closer look.

“How come I’ve never seen that?” Spencer asked, observing the cheesy light.

“Gosh, i’ve had that since college. I found it in the back of my closet today and I don’t really have much of a use for it. I do love it though,” you remarked. Emily left you and Spencer alone after being distracted by Henry.

“You know, if you really like it, you can keep it. If there's a problem with the neon, I can take a look at it,” Spencer said, taking the sign from you.

“Oh no, it's not that. I guess it's just more meant for a ‘bachelorette’ pad,” you said.

“Oh okay. You can save it if you want, just in case,” he said softly. This got your attention as you looked up to him.

“In case? I don’t have an ‘in case’. Do you have an in case?” you asked, wondering if your boyfriend had any doubts about your move in.

“No, I don’t,” he said, as if he was just realizing how real the two of you were. He leaned down and your lips met his. You pulled away from him and continued setting up your table, a smile on your face the entire time.

-

A couple months had passed since the yard sale and you were absolutely loving the little life you had with Spencer. And as the weather got colder, it was nice to have someone to snuggle next to during the winter. Christmas was coming up and you couldn’t wait for Christmas Eve at the Rossi household. Dave had decided that this year, he would start a tradition for the team, a “night of the seven fishes,” and of course his famous Rossi pasta. Everyone was able to go- this was why you loved this team. You were all “misfits,” especially with your home life- these people had become your family and you theirs, and you wouldn’t have it any other way. 

You went Christmas shopping every day leading up to the fateful Rossi dinner. One of those days, Spencer came with you and the two of you had finished up pretty late- it was already dark out. Spencer offered to drive home, which was a little out of character, but you were too tired from your day that you didn’t question it. You noticed he was taking a different route then normal, however, so you decided to interject.

“My love, you’re going like the complete opposite direction of home,” you giggled.

“I know, I just thought we’d take a detour to look at the lights,” he said nervously. You just shrugged and went with it.

 You turned up the radio when you heard your favorite Christmas song start to play. Spencer began to sing along quietly, and you looked at him surprised- he never sang in front of you. He glanced at you and laughed, before continuing his serenade. You decided to join in, belting out the lyrics to Maria Carey’s “All I Want For Christmas is You,” turning to Spencer and singing to him on the “you” parts, earning a chuckle. 

After you had been driving for a bit, he stopped the car and stepped out. You didn’t recognize your surroundings, but it looked like you were in a park. It was decorated beautifully with countless Christmas lights and ornaments hanging from trees. It truly took your breath away. Before you knew it, Spencer was opening your door and offering his hand. You took it and stepped out, still in awe of your surroundings. While you were looking around, Spencer reached inside the car and cranked the radio up, just as Frank Sinatra’s “White Christmas” began to play. He walked in front of you and bowed his head, extending his hand. 

“May I have this dance?” he asked, feigning chivalry. You couldn’t help but giggle at the sight of the man in front of you, bundled in a jacket and a scarf, nose slightly red from the cold air.

“Of course, good sir,” you said with a terrible curtsy. Taking his hand, the two of you began to slow dance in the middle of the empty parking lot, snowflakes slowly falling down. 

“You’re amazing,” you told him, pressing a kiss to his cheek. 

“You missed,” he said, before leaning back down and giving you a firm kiss on the lips. You laughed into the kiss, wondering how you scored such an incredible boyfriend. You switched positions to get closer to him, your arms wrapped around his neck and his arms around your waist. You rested your head on his chest, listening to his heartbeat. The two of you continued to sway as the song changed to “Last Christmas” by Wham! You looked up at him again, missing his face. 

“Don’t get me wrong, I love this and I love you for this, but why are we doing this?” you asked, not wanting to ruin the moment. 

“I don’t know, actually. I had the thought when we were at the mall, that I just wanted to make this your best Christmas yet. And I know you love those cheesy Hallmark movies, so I figured this was the closest way to bring one of them to life for you,” he laughed and your heart melted. 

“Well, my previous statement still stands. You are amazing, Spencer Reid,” you told him, leaning in for another kiss. The two of you swayed for a few songs longer until you both decided that not even you could keep each other warm. The drive back to your shared apartment was pleasant as you closed your eyes, letting the Christmas music and the warm feeling of Spencer's hand on your thigh lull you to sleep.

-

“Babe can you zip me up?” you asked, putting in your earrings. Spencer adjusted his tie to his satisfaction and made his way over to you in front of the full body mirror to help you with your dress.

It was Christmas Eve and the two of you were getting dressed for the big night at the Rossi house. Spencer seemed a bit more nervous than usual, but you just chalked it up to his occasional social anxiety. Once he finished zipping you up he wrapped his arms around your midsection, kissing you on the cheek. The two of you stood, looking at your reflections, for a few moments. Spencer looked as handsome as ever in his nice sweater, and you were a show stopper in your dark red velvet mini dress. It was moments like these when you stopped to think about how lucky you are to have met him- he was your future and you were his. If only he would put a ring on it.

You pulled yourself from your loving daze and finished getting ready- Spencer was already finished so he was attached at your hip as you pulled on your heels and made some finishing touches to your makeup. 

“Ready to go?” he asked, seemingly antsy to get on the road. You giggled at his eagerness and nodded, grabbing your purse and heading out to the car.

On the drive there, you once again cranked up the Christmas music and serenaded him to All I Want For Christmas is You, which was quite a frequent play on the radio. You didn’t mind, however, because it was always a way to get him to blush. Mariah Carey had that effect on people. Before you knew it, you pulled up to the Rossi mansion. Most of the team must have been there already, as it was bustling with life and Christmas joy. The front of the house was completely decked out with lights and decorations- Dave spared no expense when it came to holiday decorating. The two of you made your way up to the door, presents in hand. Garcia was on the other end of the door, apparently a few eggnogs in.

“Oh my gosh, you guys are adorable!” she shouted. You and Spencer shared a knowing look. “Everyone, the lovebirds are here! And looking like the hottest couple since Ryan Reynolds and Blake Lively,” she gasped, taking in your dress and feeling the velvet. The confused look on Spencer’s face told you all you needed to know about his knowledge of pop culture, which was none. 

Garcia ushered the two of you inside to the living room area, where the rest of the team was settled. Everyone stood up for hugs and assisted you with carrying all of your presents to the tree, which was one of the biggest Christmas trees you had ever seen. You greeted Jack and Henry, who were playing with some toy cars under the tree. You made you way back to the team, and you noticed Spencer talking quietly to Derek and JJ- you decided to let them be and you made your way to the kitchen island to talk to Rossi as he cooked.

“Wow, everything looks so great!” you commented, observing the wide array of food along the table. 

“It better, I’ve been busting my ass for hours just so you kids could have a nice meal,” Rossi said, stirring one of the pots on the stove. You laughed at his fatherly comments as Emiy took the seat next to you.

“Don’t mind him, he’s just worried he might be on the naughty list,” Prentiss joked, finishing off her glass of wine and grabbing another bottle. 

“Hey, just because I’ve gotten a few divorces doesn’t mean i'm not a good man,” he said, pointing a jokingly accusatory finger towards Prentiss. She lifted her hands in defense and laughed. 

“I hear that,” said Derek, who had suddenly appeared in the kitchen. Spencer made his way to the chair on your other side, taking a seat. He nervously fidgeted for a bit, but when you rested a comforting hand on his thigh, his nerves seemed to calm. Soon after you poured yourself a glass of wine, Rossi announced that dinner was served. With a cheer, everyone made their way to the long table, Rossi and Hotch on both ends. You sat between Spencer and Emily, waiting to serve yourself. Once everyone was settled, Rossi stood holding his glass of wine.

“I would like to take a moment to thank you all for coming tonight. There are friends, and there is family. And, there are friends that become family. You are all my family, and I wouldn't want to spend my night of the seven fishes with anyone else. Dig in,” he toasted, and was greeted with a few “salut’s” and pats on the back. With that, you all began to serve yourselves and fill your plates and wine glasses. 

-

Once everyone was full from the delicious dinner spread, you all retired to the living room. Christmas music was playing through Rossi’s amazing sound system, and you were resting your sleepy head on Spencer's shoulder, his arm around you. It had been a perfect night, and you didn’t want it to end. As you were listening to JJ tell a story about Henry’s first Christmas, the song changed to “White Christmas” by Frank Sinatra, and you were flooded with the memory of you and Spencer dancing in the parking lot. You lifted your head from his chest and looked to see he was thinking the same thing.

“It’s our song,” you whispered with a sleepy smile. Spencer nodded and gave you a quick kiss before looking at Derek, who was mouthing “do it now!” As if it were perfect timing, JJ just finished her story and Spencer stood up, gathering the attention from the room. 

“Uh, if I could have everyone's attention, please,” he started, nervously clearing his throat. You looked up at him with stars in your eyes, and he returned it. “As many of you know, Y/N and I have been dating for awhile now, and we’ve been living together for a few months,” he began. You looked around the room and made eye contact with Derek, who shot you a wink. You returned focus to your nervous boyfriend, encouraging him with your eyes. 

“Living with her has made me realize that I don’t need an ‘in case.’ I normally always have a backup plan for when things go wrong, well, as an FBI agent that comes in handy,” he chuckled nervously. “But with Y/N, I never thought to make a backup plan. I’ve just known that she is my forever,” he turned to you. “Y/N, you are my forever, and I want to make it official- I want the world to know that you mean everything to me,” he shakily got onto one knee, earning a gasp from Garcia and a few tears from JJ. From his sweater pocket, he pulled out a tiny velvet box and opened it. You stood up, hands covering your mouth and tears welling in your eyes.

“Y/N, will you marry me?” he asked, a hopeful glint in his eyes. You were in shock. You almost forgot to answer until you heard a cough from Prentiss. 

“Yes, Spence! Yes yes of course!” you shouted, putting the ring on and he stood up as you jumped into his arms, wrapping your arms around his neck and your legs around his waist. You barely registered, the whooping cheers from the rest of the team, as everyone embraced each other. Tears were shed by most of them (Hotch tried his best to hold back). 

After a minute of spinning, Spencer let you down and you observed the ring. It was one of the most beautiful things you had ever seen. 

“I helped pick it out,” JJ told you and you pulled her into a hug and thanked her before embracing Spencer once again, a happy blush across his cheeks.

“Hey, look!” Garcia said, pointing above you and Spencer's heads. Looking up, you saw the mistletoe she was pointing at. 

“Did you know that the white berries on mistletoe are actually toxic to humans?” Spencer asked, receiving a few head shakes. You looked up at him in awe, always adoring his facts.

“Come here,” you said, pulling him down by his tie and giving him a passionate (but tasteful) kiss that was greeted with a chorus of “aww’s” and a few “ewwww’s” from Jack and Henry. You both laughed and continued to mingle with the team, showing off your rock. Spencer had made it a Christmas to remember, and you were so eternally grateful to have someone who loved you as much as you loved him.

[watevermelon]

Cheater!Akaashi x Reader

✧ Summary: (Continuation) Akaashi goes yandere over the reader dismissing him.

➳ A/N: Hi hi!! SO many people in my dm’s about this Akaashi cheating scenario! I don’t mind writing about it more at all, if anything please feed my imagination because I dont know what to write! ヽ(ಠ_ಠ)ノ Checkout my updated Masterlist to see what continuations are in the works!! :) ➳ Warning: Not a Happy Ending; IM GONNA BE UP-FRONT, THIS ONE IS FUCKED UP - do not read this if any of your triggers involve yandere-like behavior: violence, kidnapping - you have been warned. ➳  Masterlist ➳  Part One ➳  Part Three (NSFW)

--------xXxXxXxXxXx--------

There was nothing, absolutely nothing, that Akaashi could ever say that would let you bring him back into your life. But the setter was intent on getting your attention, often waiting outside your classroom after school or pursuing you during your free period.

Any rumors about the relationship were quelled when Akaashi set the record straight. He would not allow anyone to sully your name, basically telling the nosy president of his fan-club that he was the one who fucked up the relationship. Akaashi told them to never bother you again, he was the cause of it all and he would do anything to regain your forgiveness.

Akaashi would never beg, but he urged you on multiple occasions to hear him out and possibly explain what he wanted. Why he thought he even had the right to ask that of you - just that fact alone flamed up your anger. He was being selfish and you wanted no part of his life anymore. 

But there was also something… majorly different about Akaashi.

He was still quiet, still the ever mannered pretty setter of the volleyball team. People still fawned over his good looks and the quiet genius that he had. But there was something off about him these days, not that you could really explain it. His gaze lingered on you too long and he just so happened to be around you even outside of school hours.

There was one time you went out to eat with your friends on the weekend, going from vendor to vendor along the busy streets of Kichijoji. At some point, you felt the telltale pinpricks at the back of your neck, turning to see his familiar blue eyes staring back at you in the distance. You swore you saw Akaashi that day, but after not seeing it again for the rest of the night, you wondered if you were truly just going insane.

He never outright said the reason why it was over to other people, but at least most knew that Akaashi was at fault. But seeing him so earnestly pleading to have a part of your life again, it made many people sympathize with the setter. They had no idea what he had done wrong, but those ignorant students were so quick to jump on his side.

You tried your best to ignore him, your best friends having your back when it came to his advances. You were rarely ever alone, friends walking with you to and from class. Konoha was your one friendship from the volleyball team that was preserved and he had mentioned once that to even him, something felt off. And so he suddenly started sitting with your group during lunch.

To your knowledge, Akaashi was still pursuing Bokuto romantically as well. The two were often engaged in public displays of affection and so you were curious as to why and how the wing-spiker was okay with Akaashi so actively chasing you. There was something off about the two of them, they were a couple, but not in the traditional sense. They had yet to confirm their relationship publicly, but had no qualms about sharing a quick peck for everyone to see.

You remembered passing the both of them as you exited home, taking the main entrance this time. They were standing there, just waiting by the stairs. You watched as their eyes scanned the crowd quickly before they latched onto you, Bokuto’s owl-like eyes, which usually held a loud innocence, were scarily following you with each step. Akaashi was no better, his blue-eyes that always mystified you, for some reason brought an uncomfortable crawl up your spine.

You only let out a breath when you turned the corner, neither volleyball member able to see you from this distance anymore. But when Bokuto turned the same corner, you felt your pace suddenly hesitate. Akaashi was nowhere to be found, the wing-spiker hot on your trail as you took out your phone. You called the first person you thought of.

“Hey, (L/N)! What’s up?” Konoha’s voice rang through the other end.

“Hey!” You hesitated, not wanting to give anything away as Bokuto’s presence loomed over you, “Um. Are you free?”

“Yeah, but I actually took the train home already.”

“No worries, I’ll go to you!” You urged.

Konoha hesitated, before asking. “Is something wrong? I can tell from your voice something’s off.”

“Um, how about we talk about it over dinner instead?”

“Sure. Where are you now?”

“I’m still by the school.”

“Ah, okay. Go back to the gates where the teachers are, I’ll go to you.”

“Thank you so much!!” You exclaimed, immediately turning around as the phone call ended.

Bokuto was right behind you.

“Hi, (L/N).”

“Bokuto-san.” You greeted, unsure why the upward drag of his gaze was lighting up every nerve in your body. 

All the signs in your head were screaming danger!

“Was that Konoha?”

“I don’t see how that concerns you.” You bit out.

“Not yet, at least.”

You swallowed in fear before angling your head proudly, “Stay away from me.”

Bokuto put a hand on your shoulder, “I know you’re mad at me and Akaashi, but we never meant to hurt you.”

You shook out of his grasp easily, saying nothing to him as you passed. When you returned to the school grounds, Akaashi was still standing where you last saw him. You rushed over to the teacher waiting by the schoolgate, your heart leaping up again when Bokuto turned the corner back to where you were and waited, eyes still trained on you. You busied yourself with your phone, texting your friends and scrolling through social media in the meantime.

It was only when Konoha showed up, this time in casual attire, did you feel like you could breath. Their eyes stayed trained on you and you swore you heard Bokuto snarl when Konoha laid a lazy arm over your shoulders.

You explained it all to Konoha, how the two were freaking you the fuck out these past few days. They kept you on edge, not in the way that should have made you mad for their relationship. But rather like they were too focusing too intently on you to be considered normal, especially with the given circumstances. If Akaashi was truly begging for forgiveness, you would have thrown hands with him long ago. But now, it felt like he was truly stalking you, his eyes following you at every open opportunity.

Konoha listened to your worries and genuinely tried to alleviate your stress. He moved to sit next to you instead of across, hugging you to his body and saying he would do his best to make sure you were okay on school grounds. You didn’t cry, just leaning a head on his shoulder as he caressed lazy circles on your back.

He walked you home that night, your hands held together and a genuine smile on your face.

And true to his word, the next day, Konoha was outside your classroom door after lunch. He even beat Akaashi to it, the setter’s annoyance obvious on his face as he watched you take Konoha’s hand.

Your best friend commended his tenacity, “Konoha is the only one with rights in this house.”

You laughed eagerly then, happy to finally have a feeling of normality setting in again. And for a while, the one who broke your heart was pushed to the side. You had more real problems at the forefront, his blue-eyes were the least of your worries when you had exams and homework due in the next couple of days. 

Akaashi’s quiet gaze and Bokuto’s bold eyes were far from you now - your friends were by your side. 

Or at least, that’s what you thought.

Konoha made sure to walk you home whenever he could. And, as per usual, he was waiting at the gate until he saw you safely enter the abode. Only then did he walk away, heading in the opposite direction toward his own family home. 

You meandered through the kitchen, grabbing an after-school snack and blasting music in one ear as you walked up to your room. Shaking off your backpack, which hung on one-shoulder to begin with, you threw it onto your bed before taking out some of your books. You wanted a jump-start on this homework and you knew that if you mentally wandered off now, there was no doing it at all.

You dragged the textbook out and plopped it on your desk, notebook following as you sat down and mentally prepared yourself. The last few lessons in chemistry were confusing, but not impossible. With the right amount of concentration, it would be done easily with time to spare for a nap within the hour.

Leaning down and angling your head down towards the table, your focus was completely on the task at hand.

You weren’t expecting a completely separate hand to slam the textbook close and latch a firm grip around your neck.

“Finally, we’re alone.”

You struggled against his hold, the striking blue-eyes that you got to know over the past year now reflecting back at you. Akaashi had your neck between his fingers, the usually docile setter lifting you to your tippy-toes. Panic set in just as quickly as you were losing your strength, air circulation cutting off as your ex-boyfriend assaulted your person.

Trying your best to push him off, you punched at both his chest and the arm holding you, but he deflected it easily and simply continued to watch you fail to heave in air in his fist. Only when you felt your eyes rolling backward, barely on the brink of consciousness, did he drop you to the ground.

“I’m sorry, my love.” Akaashi stated, affectionate pet-name a complete contrast to his monotone voice. This was nothing like the boyfriend you had for the past year. His loving eyes screamed of danger and you wanted nothing more than to leave immediately.

You were down on your hands and knees, gasping in air in both shock and disbelief. Had Akaashi really choked you within the safety of your own home? You rubbed at your neck, as if the action would help you fill back-up your lungs. 

You had to get out of here, now.

Glancing over to your door, Akaashi immediately entered your line of sight and kicked you in the abdomen.

“Now how is that fair?” Akaashi asked, “I went through all this trouble to make sure we would have this moment alone.”

You heaved out, “Why are you doing this?”

“You weren’t willing to listen to me back at school.” Akaashi spat out, as if this was your fault. “And I couldn’t wait any longer - who knows how far that bastard Konoha would have gone if I waited?”

Desperate to put any distance between you and this monster, you crawled back toward your bed, only for Akaashi to close it with paces of his own.

“Shut up.” You boldly stated, struggling to stand but doing so anyway. “You are the one who ruined everything.”

“Baby, I said I’m sorry a hundred times and I’ll do it again if I have to.” Akaashi whined before his face took on a darker look, “Why don’t you understand? What do I have to do to make you understand?”

Not wanting to take another kick to the middle or worse, you tried to talk it out before you could think of a plan to escape. “Understand what?”

“Understand how much I love you.”

You reaction was instantaneous, not even your dumb fuck mind could read the danger in the room.

“What a fucking lie.” Akaashi recoiled, ready to challenge you before you continued. “You don’t cheat on the people you love! And you don’t physically hurt them and break into the homes your victims!”

“Yes, I do.”

“Are you fucking phsychotic?!” You yelled back.

Mental reminder: don’t yell that at someone who is clearly off their rockers.

Akaashi laughed loudly, at what exactly, you were not sure. But it was not the right question since it elicited that type of response. He just cracked a half-broken smile, one that felt wrong and yet genuine.

“Get out of my house!”

The look he shot you back - a quirked brow and a small smirk, none of which was the usually calm Akaashi you were used to - basically told you how dumb your statement was.

Instead you asked, “Why are you doing this?”

“To claim the one I love.” He guestered out to you, out-stretching a hand for you to take.

There were two options here: take the hand and get sucked into the immediate space with him. Or don’t take it and risk losing a fight with the nationally-competing athlete in a matter of seconds. Or worse, anger him to the point of extreme violence like before.

There was no convincing yourself this was normal, your shaky hand hesitantly reaching out to Akaashi’s open palm. He smiled gently at you, almost slipping on the usual mask of the perfect boyfriend that you had originally fallen for. But when he tightly gripped your hand and pulled you to him, you knew that was all a farce for this much more violent persona.

“I knew you would understand. We’re meant to be together, I know it.” He murmured against your ear, holding you at the waist against his body. You almost verbally gagged at the thought of him grinding against you, but if you wanted out of his house you would have to take the first opening you got. You had to play it smart.

Akaashi leaned down to kiss you and not even your survival instincts were enough to hide your true feelings. He must not have liked what he was seeing, since he forcibly grabbed at your chin to angle up towards you. You pulled at the feeling, wrapping your arms around the back of his neck to get him to think you were playing into it.

His eyes fluttered closed, relishing in the feel of you steadying yourself, of you giving, against his body.

And you kneed him in the groin as hard as you could.

Akaashi doubled over immediately and his grasp on you crumbled. You took the chance and ran out the door, slamming it behind you as you ran down the hallway and towards the stairs. The danger looming behind you was extraordinary, the loud scream of anger coming from the setter was enough indication that he was hot on your heels.

You scrambled toward your front door, throwing it open and screaming out into the neighborhood for anyone in the near vicinity to help. There was a woman walking her dog and another person on their phone and you pleaded with them with rabid yells for their attention.

But before they even tried to help you, a hand clasped over your mouth and dragged you back into the house.

This person, you could not fight off, his strength more than even you and Akaashi combined. Bokuto pulled you back into your living room, tossing you on the ground with no regard to how much power was behind his movements. 

That was when you realized how much they truly planned this out. You always felt their eyes on you for a reason - they were memorizing your schedule. 

From the route you took home, to when you had off-days, to the one time in weeks that both your parents would not be home tonight - Akaashi and Bokuto had planned it all.

And now you were trapped in your own home with two violent volleyball members.

Bokuto looked at you expectedly while Akaashi trudged down your banister, his gaze harsh and predatory as it scanned your figure on the ground. You were sandwiched between the two, nowhere to run and if you were to scream, then the wing-spiker would just hold you down like before or worse, the setter would choke you until you had no voice.

“Let me go.” You stated, voice promulgating the silent air.

Bokuto crossed his arms and walked to your kitchen, expression on his face stating that he wasn’t willing to listen to you beg. His presence alone was a silent warning, run and he will catch you. 

You backed away from Akaashi but he rushed forward to grab you by the hair, pulling you to a standing position and forcing your lips together. The force was bruising, not at all romantic or gentle like you had done so in the past. He was nipping harshly, surely swollen lips under his teeth as he continued to assault your person. 

“You are mine, forever.” He muttered against your lips, locking in your future least you face the consequences of disobeying.

--------xXxXxXxXxXx--------

Come checkout some of the other ending’s for the Cheater!Akaashi scenario:

➳  Masterlist ➳  Part One ➳  Part Three (nsfw)

[angie-s-g]

IM SOBBING LOOKING AT THE SANGCHENG WEDDING 😭😭😭😭 THEY BOTH DESERVED SO MUCH BETTER

LISTEN

THEY DESERVE A FUCKING BREAK AND THEN SOME.

Jiang Cheng has basically spent all the fucking canon mourning and grieving and hating wwx but still wanting him back. He deserves to be able to hold his family and live in fucking peace. He deserves to be shown that he is loved and that he matters. That he’s raised Jin Ling right, a testimony of her sister’s love and 

and Nie Huaisang? LISTEN, Nie Huaisang didn’t deserve what happened to him. He loved Meng Yao like a brother. He trusted him and was betrayed in the worst of ways. JGY didn’t have enough by poisoning NMJ little by little and killing him. No, he had to involve Huaisang, teach him how to play the melody that would fuck up his Qi and make him use it. And then? ah yeah, chop NMJ’s head so that by daoist standards he can’t reincarnate. Nie Huaisang deserves whatever he wants because even with Jc, wwx or lwj around, he is the one who’s suffered the most because his arc doesn’t have a fix. He is the one who’s got absolutely nothing left to look forward to. Wwx? yeah, lost his sister and the wens and suffered a lot but now has a second chance at life and a husband and a son (and even a brother if they manage to somewhat fix things). Lwj? those 3 years in the cold pond cave and those 13 years looking for wwx must have been horrible but in the meantime he raised a-yuan and now he’s got his wwx back and his love is returned. He even got his husband sort of accepted into the Lan family. His only current pain must be the poor state in which his brother must be. And I’m not diminishing that, but I’m sure that neither lwj nor wwx (nor even lqr) will let Xichen slip away.

Nie Huaisang on the other hand? He doesn’t have his brother anymore. He will never have him back. Not now not in a different life. Unless they find a way to get someone’s soul back in the reincarnation wheel that is not happening. And meanwhile he’s got a sect to run (which he never wanted) and problems to solve, like what to do with the blade spirits (which he never even wanted to have anything to do with). His peers think he is a fool thanks to the mask he created. His friends? what friends? wwx’s last words to him read like a threat, his sworn brother is in seclusion and everyone else is probably just eyeing him with suspicion, including JC.

So yeah, all this long rant is just to say that

I WILL MAKE SURE THAT BOTH JC AND NIE HUAISANG ARE HAPPY IN MY ART AND FICS BECAUSE THAT’S WHAT THEY DESERVE.

/end rant (Sorry this took me almost a month to answer anon. I’m so glad you liked the wedding pic ♥)

[zaikaglow]

Umbrageous Part 4

Pairing: Hange x Reader, Eren x Reader, Erwin x Reader (soon to be Levi x Reader)

Summary: Erwin is out and leaves you under Eren’s watchful eye to keep you out of trouble but when he gets called into the office on a Saturday what is a girl to do to entertain herself while plotting her next move of her office conquest

Content Warnings: Step dad! Erwin, alcoholism mention, size kink, cheating, pseudoincest

This chapter is the longest yet but I decided not to break it up for cohesiveness (if its to hard to read I may break it up if I get that request)

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5

You were laying in bed wrapped under the covers when you felt a hand touch your foot, Erwin you assume. A smile spreads across your face even while it's buried into the pillow, you feel happy knowing Erwin couldn't resist you so badly he was sneaking into your room while your mother slept off her hangover upstairs. But it's still only 7am and you're tired so you just tug open the covers as an invitation to slide in next to you. Instead of feeling a warm Erwin sliding in next to you to wrap you up in his big arms you're jolted as someone jumps into the bed and a nose starts to nuzzle behind your ear and under your jaw. “Eren”??? You exclaim as you sit up in bed looking bewildered that somehow this boy had gotten into your room. He’s laying down, head propped up on one hand, his elbow digging into the pillow next to yours. “Your dad told me to come and wake you” he says smiling ear to ear “uhh what are you doing here? On a saturday?” you reply still confused as to why he’s here. His eyebrows raised a little, seeming almost a little hurt that you seemed more confused than excited, the poor boy was so down bad for you at times you almost felt a little bad that he was a pawn in your deprived incestous game. “Mr.Smith told me he had an event to go to today and that I should come hand out to keep you company today, he’s making breakfast downstairs”. You place a hand onto his cheek rubbing your thumb in circles in an attempt to placate the saddened look on his face. It works and his smile returns and he takes your hand in his “let's go downstairs”. 

Erwin is at the stove wearing a white tee shirt and his old plaid pajama bottoms, so simple and yet he looks oh so handsome especially when he turns around and smiles “Thanks for getting y/n out of bed Eren”. You both take a seat at the table Erwin places plates of pancakes in front of you and Eren and the dark haired boy slides his hand onto your thigh. “So are you and mom going out tonight or something” you say, still confused as to why Erwin would have invited the “Jaeger boy” into your house and then sending him into your bedroom. Erwin now sits down with the two of you at the table “Yes we have an engagement for her work this evening but we’ll be leaving soon. I figured your friend Eren here could keep you company while we're gone. Keep you out of trouble” He says with a wink. “I'll do my best Mr.Smith” Eren says mouth full, he’s lucky he’s hot otherwise that would have been utterly repulsive. 

A few hours later and your mom and Erwin had left, they were probably going to be staying the night at some Inn since the event was so far away but Erwin had made sure to tell Eren that while he was to keep you company today he shouldn't be staying the night and that he’d be checking in. You and Eren were sitting on your bed, you laying down feet propped up against the headboard scrolling through your phone ignoring a text from Jean asking how you were doing over break and asking if you wanted to hang out once the break ended and that he missed you.. Like he missed his other friends of course (him trying to cover up his feelings only making them more obvious. Eren is sitting at the foot of the bed rattling off things that you could be doing. He wanted to prove to you that he could show you a good time, hopeful that after you both went back to school that you’d still want to see him. You two had been at the same campus this past year and you had never even known he existed; he worried about how easy it would be to forget him after the winter break ended. “Well we could go sledding? I have some old ones back at my place and there's this hill right in town I think that will be fun? Would you think that would be fun?” Eren was rambling when suddenly his phone went off and his eyes went wide “Mr.Ackermen? No it's okay, yeah I can help. Uh actually I was supposed to watch Mr.Smith's daughter today can I bring her? Oh really? Okay I guess that works out” he hangs up the phone. The words coming out of his mouth are so fast they almost blur together “Uhh y/n Im really sorry but Mr.Ackerman’s client had a problem come up and I know it's saturday but I have to come in a help but also the client is there and they're pretty cool i've met them so do you want to come with me? You could hang out with Hange or something. I'm sorry” he looks so nervous that you're about to get mad or upset but his face relaxes as you turn your head and just say “sure” right as you send a text saying the exact same thing to Jean.

It feels strange being back at the office on a saturday the normal bustle of people gone but also you were excited this felt like a way to get your foot in the door or zipper? Of Mr.Ackermans pants. You still knew that this would be the best way to get under Erwin’s skin and force his hand, but you hoped you could do it without Eren finding out it would break the poor boy's heart and he was a pretty good lay in the meantime besides you’ve never even seen Mr.Ackerman for all you knew he was an ugly old guy. You werent even sure if he’d be someone you could tolerate fucking for pure revenge yet.

But that fear was quelled when you saw him, surprised a little by his height he was tiny and you’d have to look down to meet his eye but he was beautiful. His undercut raven hair makes his stealy eyes look exceptionally blue. He was so perfect and little it was almost like he was a doll. And you were surprised at yourself, you mean you had laughed at the jokes about short guys before using the word “manlet” but you couldn't help but notice the tingling in between your thighs thinking about how hot it would be to be towering over him tilting up his perfect little chin to look you in the eyes as you pinned him down with your thighs.

“Eren, when you said you had to watch someone I figured it be a child” Mr.Ackerman said raising an eyebrow

“Yeah well my dad seems to think I’m one” you replied, voice dripping with sarcasm. The corners of Mr.Ackerman’s lips lifted and he let out a small chuckle “I’m Levi, you dad's business partner” he says extending his hand. You give it a slight squeeze to his hand shake admiring how delicate his hands were. “Im y/n it’s nice to finally meet you”. Eren steps out from behind you “So does this mean I can call you Levi now?” Eren chimes in “No” Levi replys rather flatly. It looks like he’s about to say something else when suddenly you see someone emerge from Levi’s office “Leeeeviiii is that your little friend whos here to help? Oh Eren it's nice to see you again!” you're a little surprised how this stranger is also very attractive, you were so used to messing with boys that you were a little caught off guard by just how attractive this feminine  presenting person was. What the fuck was in the water in this town. Instead of walking around the couch that was placed by the office door they clamored over it, Levi wincing as their feet touched the cushions. “Hi, I’m y/n” you say extending your hand the stranger grabs it with both of their hands “I'm Hange Zoe, it's nice to meet you” they say with the most endearing smile. “Hange I told you to keep your goddamn feet off my couch!” Levi exclaims, still holding onto your hands Hange replies ``oh relax, you're so uptight I know you’d make everyone take their shoes off in here if you could”.

“Absolutely I would. Eren we have work to do, Hange try not to bore y/n to death” Levi says before closing the office door behind him. Hange pulls you back onto the cough they had previously just climbed over and asked you how you felt about science. “I like it, I'm actually majoring in biology right now” you say Hange’s eyes light up. They tell you about how they owned a small biotech company that was undergoing a merger and that was what brought them to Levi and Erwin’s business. They went on for a few hours about the intricacies of what they did when suddenly they stopped noticing you staring “Im sorry am I boring you? I’m told I have a habit of droning on” they say apologetic looks in their eyes. “No you're not boring me, I just noticed how beautiful your eyes are”. That's when they invited you back to their hotel, you had both been there so long, Eren and Levi were still working and it would be a while so why not? They popped in to tell the men they’d be giving you a ride home and that when you found yourself sitting on a queen sized bed drink in hand when Hange tucked a strand of hair behind your ear.

“I’ve never done this before, had sex with someone who’s not a man” you say shly Hange is kissing up your neck when they make it to your ear they whisper “youre a scientist” they nip at your earlobe “consider it a sort of experiment” they kiss you tasting sweet tang of their drink on your mouth. You bite your bottom lip sliding your hand up their thighs “will you teach me?” Hange bends down to kiss your ribs over your shirt their hands starting to move towards the button of your jeans when you place your hands over their harms running them up till you meet their jaw and pull their face back up to meet yours “you first” you mutter before dropping to your knees your head now between theirs. Your fingers make quick work of Hange’s button down and when you get to their chest you notice they weren't wearing a bra under their shirt. You kiss by their navel dragging your tongue up till you reach their nipple swirling your tongue around it before latching your lips to it. With how soft they felt in your hand and the way they moaned, threw their head back and gripped at the bed sheet you could feel your own panties getting soaked. You start to move your head back down kissing along their stomach until you get to their waistband you look up at Hange while your delicate fingers start to unbutton their slacks ``you're going to tell me what to do right?” their hand brushes your hair back, their fingers massaging through your scalp “of course my dear”. 

Hange’s hands are pressed to both sides of your face “hhmm thats it, keep circling just like that” you have 2 fingers inside their tight cunt moving in and out making sure to use your knuckles to hit that sweet spot at the top just like Erwin does for you. You keep your pointed tongue moving in quick circles around their clit pausing every few strokes to wrap your lips around it and suck, until finally the fist your hair in their hands as you feel them start to clench around your fingers “good girl, now your turn”. They take your arms pulling you up as they lay down bringing your core right above their mouth kissing your slit over your panties hand running down your thigh, trailing their finger down the crease of your thigh and and core until they reach around the fabric pulling it to the side before dipping their tongue inside you. Your thighs squeeze around Hange’s face as they drag their tongue out of you and up around your clit. Fingers starting to run up your body making their way to your bra. Instead of unclasping it they pull down the cups letting your breasts spill out, fingers tweaking your nipples. It's all too much as you reach back to undo the rest of the bra you feel yourself getting closer as their tongue is back and forward from your dripping slit to your clit and you throw your head back in ecstasy as you ride out your orgasm on their thick tongue.

Laying back in bed Hange has their hands folded behind their head while your sitting cross legged blankets are pulled up to your wrist but your chest is still bare “hey Hange this may not be the best time for this.. But uh is that Levi guy single?” you say playing with fabric between your two fingers too embarrassed to look at the person who just fucked you into oblivion about another. A smile breaks across Hange’s face as they sit up and prop their head up under their fist “Levi?? You're interested really?” you look over at them trying to contain the nervous smile you feel tugging at your lips “yeah I think I am”. They laugh “That little hardass he seems tough but I know he’s lonely he’d appreciate attention from someone as delectable as you”, they tilt their head to the side “I'll introduce you to him again, I know how to warm him up”

Tag List: @thestrugglesofateenagedirtbag​

[hawkbucks]

I don't even remember if I reposted it, but here's the WinterIron fake dating AU that I found on my disc drive. I combined all the posts in one; where there's a divider, that means it was a new post.

Lotta fake dating fics have Tony be the one who asks Bucky and I love it, but also: Bucky being the one asking Tony?

Like, maybe Rebecca is getting married and she asks him “are you bringing anyone?” with the most hopeful look on her face.

Bucky sorta bluescreens and stutters out a “yeah” because he knows Rebecca really wants to see him with someone and happy, but he’s only really been focusing on his studies instead of his social life.

She smiles and claps her hands together, exclaiming her excitement to meet Bucky’s date! Meanwhile, Bucky is panicking on the inside.

He could ask Steve, considering that he and Steve are best friends and no one would really question them getting together, but there’s also the fact that Rebecca knows Steve better than Steve probably knows himself and would tell they’re faking right off the bat.

There’s Sam who, despite their teasing relationship, they really do like each other. He wouldn’t have too much of a problem bringing Sam around if he doesn’t already know that Sam would hang this over his head for the rest of his life and all but force Bucky to buy him food and clothes and stuff to repay him, and that’s not even talking about the endless teasing.

There’s Sharon, but she wouldn’t agree. She’d just roll her eyes and call him dramatic. It’s a fair judgement.

There’s Natasha, and they’ve actually dated before and that would be awkward. “Oh yeah, the girl I used to date back when I was a sophomore in high school and I are back together again!”

He still ends up texting Steve and explaining his dilemma and please, Steve, do you know anyone?

Steve tells him he’s an idiot which, fair, yeah, but then he tells Bucky that he knows a guy, cute, your type, I can give him your number. Then he sends Bucky a photo of himself and some other guy with brown hair and pretty eyes and dimples, what the fuck.

Please give him my number.

I can feel your thirst, Steve texts. Disgusting.

So, he brings Tony (all it took was confirming that there was going to be food and that yeah, they have salmon as a menu item, is that what you want me to pick?), and Tony’s a hit! He’s charming, polite, and pretty cute to boot.

Then Rebecca corners Bucky during the reception while Tony’s getting some cupcakes and Bucky immediately jumps to the conclusion that Rebecca figured out that they’re not actually dating and she’s about to tear him a new one, but she smiles and gives him a bear hug. “Your boyfriend is a sweetheart,” she gushes, “and I’m glad you brought him along. And, you know, Robert and I are having a party for Thanksgiving. Maybe you two would like to come?”

And the only thing that runs through Bucky’s head is shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit—

Bucky can’t handle these feelings. He just can’t. It’s too much too soon, and the intensity at which he feels them is both overwhelming and terrifying to him, especially since he and Tony haven’t even known each other for that long.

During the party, Tony really pushes the act. He takes Bucky’s arm and places it around his shoulders, feeds Bucky some pumpkin pie, blushing when Rebecca coos at the both of them, and even sits on Bucky’s lap when everyone heads to the couch to catch the recording of the Macy’s Thanksgiving Parade that Rebecca set.

And Bucky desperately wishes it was all real. He wishes that Tony really is in love with him as opposed to doing this to help out. He’s never felt warmer than when Tony smiles at him, bright and genuine and making him ache all over. He knows that his feelings are only going to keep snowballing and snowballing until he can’t take it anymore and snaps and confesses to Tony, and he doesn’t want that. He doesn’t want Tony to feel obligated to go out with him. He doesn’t want Tony to feel like he’s being put on the spot.

Tony cuddles closer to him, whispering about how the Snoopy float looks really cute. He chokes down a sob and responds with “yeah, doll, it does”.

Bucky drives Tony home. He always does. It’s the least he can do. “So, when are you going to need a boyfriend again?” Tony teases, feet up on the dashboard. They’re already at Tony’s apartment complex, but Tony, infuriatingly attractive Tony, insists on talking to him. “If you’re swinging by Becca’s for Christmas, I can come with you.”

He doesn’t respond, instead choosing to continue looking ahead and squeezing his hands on the steering wheel. “Hey, you alright?” Tony asks softly and, god, he wishes Tony wasn’t the way he was.

Rip it off. Like a band-aid. C’mon, Barnes. “It’s fine. I’ll just tell her we broke up.”

“What?” Tony’s voice wavers, an undercurrent of hurt swimming below that one word. Bucky hates himself for it. “Did I do something wrong? At the party? I—”

Bucky sets his jaw, looking at Tony (and wishing he didn’t because Tony actually looks devastated). “We were never really together, Tony. Don’t act like it matters.”

He hears a hitch in Tony’s breath. He looks away. “Yeah, I guess it doesn’t.” Tony unbuckles his seatbelt and opens the car door. “Maybe this is why you don’t have an actual boyfriend.” It hurts, but it’s better that Tony leaves hating him because he can’t imagine the breakdown he’d have if Tony kept coming around with those kicked puppy eyes of his and asking why Bucky has been avoiding him.

Tony walks into his apartment complex without looking back.

Bucky thinks he needs to get drunk.

And that’s how Steve finds him. Completely sloshed, half-sitting half-lying on the couch with red-rimmed eyes and a tear-stained hoodie. “St’ve,” he slurs, lifting his bottle of Jack Daniel’s.

Steve sighs. “What, did Becks show everyone your baby pictures again?”

Bucky shakes his head. “Fucked up.”

“Yeah, I can see that. At least save some of that for me.”

He shakes his head again. “Tony hates me.”

Steve freezes, halfway through shucking off his jacket. “What did you do?” He looks at Bucky with that Disappointed Parental Stare of his.

“He hates me.” Bucky feels himself start to tear up again as he reminds himself that he won’t be able to see Tony again. Won’t be able to breathe in the comforting smell of that vanilla and cinnamon lotion that he’s so fond of. “Made ‘im hate me.”

“Why in the hell would you do that?” Steve gets his jacket off this time, throwing it on the hook and not paying it any attention when it slips off and falls to the floor with a thud.

“Don’t know.” Which is a lie. He knows why. He just doesn’t want to face it.

“No, no, you don’t get to feign ignorance.” Steve walks over and takes the bottle from him, ignoring Bucky’s protests and whines and taking a few swigs of his own. “I’ve only seen you get this drunk twice before: the first was when you and Nat broke up and you broke into your dad’s liquor cabinet, and the second was when you came home from the army. Considering I don’t see your fatigues with you—”

Bucky growls weakly. “Shut up, Steve—”

“Then stop pushing people away,” Steve growls right back. “You fix this.”

“We didn’t ev’n know each other that long—”

“No, you might not have, but if you’re sitting here on our couch, drunk off your ass ‘cause you think he hates you, that means something. Fix. This.”

Then Steve’s phone goes off. He sets down the Jack and he fishes his phone out of his pocket. A swipe, and it’s unlocked. He snorts, shaking his head. “You know who just texted me?”

Hope. “Tony?”

“No. His best friend. You want to know what it says?”

Bucky doesn’t think his answer matters much. Something tells him Steve will tell him even if he says no. “Go.”

Steve clears his throat. “’Hope your buddy is happy. Tony won’t stop crying.’ Then some middle finger emojis. Seven of them, to be exact.”

Bucky sinks further into the couch, his stomach twisting into knots and nausea rising up his throat now that he knows Tony is crying and he’s the reason why. He makes a swipe at the Daniels, but is unable to reach far enough. “You gon’ reply?” he croaks.

“Oh, yeah. I’m gonna tell him that you’re being miserable, too. And that you’re an idiot.”

Bucky grunts.

“It’s for your own safety. Believe me, if he thinks you’re getting your jollies from this, he’ll send you on a one-way ticket to hell.”

He grunts again. That’s only mildly terrifying. And probably not even close to what he thinks he himself deserves. “You gon’ leave?”

“Yes. And I’m taking this—” Steve picks up the Jack— “with me.”

True to his word, Steve leaves with the bottle of Jack.

Bucky sits up and uses the sleeves of his hoodie to dry his eyes. He tries to keep quiet as he sobs.

The next day, he goes out, stretches his legs after spending the entire night on his couch. He contemplates going to visit Tony and beg for his forgiveness, but it’s… it’s probably too soon. He’ll just wait. In the meantime, he picks up a plush of Snoopy holding a heart. It’s cute.

1 week. He thinks he’ll wait a little more.

2 weeks. Maybe just a bit more.

(Rebecca calls. Asks him about Tony. He says that they broke up. She only replies with a small I’m sorry. It was clear that you two loved each other.

He bites his lip so hard that he tastes copper.)

3 weeks. It’s just a bit before Christmas. Steve comes into his room. “Rhodes texted me. He said Tony admitted that he wants to see you again. Apparently he passed on my word that you were being pretty gloomy about it too.”

Bucky fidgets on his bed. “So, what, I’m just supposed to roll up on his apartment with some flowers and chocolate?”

“Sarcastic bastard,” Steve mutters, although there’s no real venom behind his words. “It’d be a start.”

Bucky thinks for a second. He gets up and starts rifling through his closet. “Alright. Leave so I can change.” Thankfully, Steve obliges. Bucky tucks the Snoopy into his backpack.

He picks up some Ferrero Rocher. He remembers Tony eating them by the handful at the reception. It’s packaged in a transparent box shaped like a heart. For the flowers, he picks up some red roses, the classic choice. He even gets a card that says “I’M SORRY!” with a picture of a sad-looking cat on it.

“Girlfriend troubles?” the cashier asks as they ring him up.

“Boyfriend, actually,” he replies, surprised at how easily that rolls off his tongue.

They hum. “Hope it gets better soon, man.”

He hopes so too. “Thanks.”

Somehow, he manages to make the drive to Tony’s apartment without crashing the car. 6339. He remembers Tony telling him his apartment number if he ever wanted to come up and visit. Looks like he’s finally taking him up on that offer.

Before his nerves can take over and tell him to run and maybe flee the country, he takes the elevator up after explaining to the concierge that he’s there to visit a friend. He knocks on Tony’s door, holding the flowers up in front of his face, the Snoopy plush sitting on top of them along with the card. The box of chocolates he holds behind his back.

When he hears the door open, he pulls the flowers down just enough to see over them. “Hi.”

“Bucky,” Tony breathes out. He looks like he’s about to start crying again, clad in his donut-patterned pajama pants and an oversized shirt that advertises a noodle place that Bucky passed on his way. (Seriously. So many tears!) “Why’re you here?”

“To say sorry.” Bucky holds the flowers out.

“What you said really hurt,” Tony says, voice cracking, but he takes the flowers. “You got me a Snoopy?” He takes the plush off of the bouquet and smiles softly at it before looking back up at Bucky, expression holding cautious hope. He places Snoopy back in the bouquet.

“I know. I’m sorry. I was… I don’t know, scared. Not that I’m tryin’ to come up with an excuse for myself, but… you know.” He shows Tony the chocolates this time.

“Scared?” Tony takes the chocolates like he took the flowers.

“I really like you, Tony. I was thinking about asking you out for real after the party,” Bucky admits, looking Tony in the eye and hoping that Tony can see that he’s being genuine. His palms start getting clammy. Is the temperature rising or is it just him? “And I was scared.”

“Why?” Tony asks, sounding on the edge of desperation. “Why were you so scared you couldn’t just tell me?”

“Because I didn’t want you to feel obliged to say yes.”

Tony tilts his head to the side, eyebrows furrowed as a frown tugs at his lips.

Bucky begins to regret his answer. Obviously it isn’t one that Tony likes.

“Is that it?” Tony sounds gentle. So gentle. “I like you too, you know. And you know I’m not a pushover. If I didn’t want to go out with you, I would’ve told you that.”

“I know. I know, but I never said my mind was good at thinking rationally.” The corner of Bucky’s mouth quirks up at the self-deprecation.

“Mine isn’t either.” Tony places the chocolates with the card and the Snoopy in the bouquet, using that now free hand to wipe at his eyes. His sniffles. “And I have to apologize too. For what I said before I left your car.”

“It’s fine, Tony—”

“No, it’s not. It was such an asshole thing to say.” Tony sounds upset on Bucky’s behalf.

“I made you angry.”

“That didn’t give me the right to imply that you’re unlovable.” Tony stares at him in silent challenge. Try and refute me, his eyes say. “I’m sorry.”

Bucky shakes his head, knowing there’s only one way to end this. “I accept your apology.”

“And I accept yours.” Tony smiles at him, nose tinged with pink, and a burst of warmth spreads in Bucky’s chest. It’s gratifying to see that smile directed his way again. He just might join Tony in sniffling if this continues.

Tony reaches out to grab his hand, lacing their fingers together. “Why don’t you come inside? I can make you some coffee.”

“I’d like that,” Bucky says, squeezing Tony’s hand once. “I’d like that a lot.”

—

If you guys are curious, I listened to this song on repeat while doing this lol. (The link should lead to a video with the English translation!)

[hello-im-not-a-possum]

26. Pipe

It wasn’t Wally’s firstborn son, Vincent, that took over his company, nor was it his middle child, Jonathan. Instead, it was his youngest daughter, Samantha, who took that knowledge working with pipes and put it to good use, although the repairwoman and plumber couldn’t imagine herself using a pipe like that before... (Set in the FIFE AU, RIGHT at the start, as in, as soon as the Ink’s Freeing everyone because it hasn’t been fed.)

Joey couldn’t help but let out a sigh of relief when he heard the knock at his door and the muffled greeting from the other side.

“Franks’ Repair and Plumbing.” After a short pause, the voice on the other side spoke again. “..Anyone home?”

He took his cane and hobbled over to the door, opening it and jumping back in shock when he saw who was behind it.

In a lot of ways, the repairwoman was the spitting image of her late father; same black eyes, same nose, same eye shape, same skin tone, same lost tooth that was clearly gotten in a fight, ...Same hat; a newsboy cap that Wally wore when he didn’t want to ruin the baseball cap he liked with ink. In her case, it could’ve been the EXACT same hat as it looked very old and worn, and it was stained by ink before she even set foot in his apartment even though he doubted she worked with the stuff considering her job.

There were still clear differences keeping her from looking like a clone of the janitor he killed; like her jet black hair kept in a tight low bun and that she had a much more muscular physique, but the resemblance was still uncanny to him.

“You wanna stop gawkin’ an’ get your shit fixed or do ya wanna keep pissin’ your pants in shock, Gramps?”

Her nametag read ‘Sammy’ and her rudeness certainly reminded him of that musician.

“I… Well,” he cleared his throat “you just so happen to remind me of old friends of mine. And it took me off guard.”

“Uh huh. Let’s just cut to the point, you say you called me for a problem with a rare machine of yours?”

“Yes, it hasn’t been working for five days now and it’s been pumping... ...stuff through my plumbing!”

“A’right, can ya show me da machine?”

“Gladly.” He hobbled into the room where he normally kept it with the repairwoman following him and muttering something under her breath. “Here we are.”

“So dis here is the ink machine?” she circled around it and tapped it with her wrench here and there and muttered more things under her breath as she took a close look at it. “Eitha you should’ve called me in way sooner, or ya shoulda scrapped this hunk of junk and not even bothered in da first place.”

“Well, can you save it?”

“Hmm…” she popped her gum and shrugged. “I’m no miracle worker, but I can try. Don’t get your hopes up though, I’ve never seen anything like this before...”

Joey bit his lip, it was an expected response, but it wasn’t a good one. As Sammy continued to work on the machine, the former animator limped to the entrance to the Ink Demon’s realm, took a quick peek inside, and slammed it shut as he saw Henry speed towards him. He cursed under his breath as Henry started beating on the door.

“What da fuck is that noise?” Sammy called out from the ink machine’s room. “Sounds like someone tryin’ ta break a door down ta murdah ya!”

“I-it’s just the washing machine in the basement!” Joey tried to keep the door shut with all his weight pressed against it. “Remember how I said that the ink machine is messing with the plumbing?”

“Maybe I should go check dat out too then, one bad pipe tends to take the others down with it when you’re not careful...”

“N-no! I’m sure it will go back to normal if the Ink machine’s fixed…”

“I can’t do this with distractions goin’ on, I’ll just shut it off real quick an’ get back ta work on this.”

“I’m sure it’ll die down on it’s own soon! Don’t get up!”

Propping a chair up against the banging door, Joey speed-limped to his desk and drew like wildfire; the Ink Demon emerging out of the machine without Henry going to it first, the Demon breaking down the boards and stuff around it and going right towards Henry. He stopped holding his breath in anticipation when the thumping died down on the other side, the story waiting for him to properly restart it so he could tell it again.

For a few hours, he left his desk untouched as he counted down the seconds for her to hurry up and fix it and leave. The already long hours feeling like an eternity as the hurdle standing between him and his goals grew more and more infuriating with each and every single tick of the clock.

Luckily for him, it sounded like she was making progress, but she wasn’t doing it fast enough for his liking. Thankfully she was far too focused on the machine itself to notice it’s effects on the rest of the house.

Like the groaning swollen searcher oozing out of his bathtub tap, or his kitchen sink slowly filling up with ink with the stolen hearts of ink creatures floating and bobbing away in the messy sink. He swore that the TV turned on on it’s own and started playing “Tombstone Picnic”, but Sammy didn’t seen to notice in spite of the cartoon playing very loudly. Joey just silently prayed she’d get those damn pipes inside it fixed and get out.

“Okay, I think it’s fixed now.”

The phrase was music to the old man’s ears and as he walked in, he could in fact notice an improvement with the machine itself.

“Wanna give it a test whirl ta be sure?”

“I think I will later, thank you.” He staggered as he fished his wallet out of his bathrobe pocket. “I’ll call you if I notice anything out of the ordinary again.”

“So what’s it supposed ta do, anyway?”

“Oh it just makes... things...” Joey handed her a check. “Nothing too interesting...”

The Ink Machine on the floor sputtered to life on its own and spat out a large glob of ink, a long metal pipe, and a tape recorder that was slightly encased in the dark stuff.

“That’s supposed to happen.” Joey lied as he reached for the plug and pulled it out.

“Uh... okay..? Have a decent rest of your day then...”

As she turned to leave, the tape recorder on the ink clicked on on it’s own as well, and a very familiar voice came out of it.

“...Sam..an...tha..?” The speaker crackled in a voice that made her tear up as she heard it. “Sammy, is dat you?! It’s me, Dad! Dis ain’t a recording! I’m in da tape! I’M IN DA TAPE!”

Joey cursed under his breath as the repairwoman turned back in shock and heard a softness enter her voice that he didn’t know that the woman was capable of.

“...Daddy?”

She ran back and scooped up the tape recorder in spite of the old man trying to wrangle it away from her.

“Daddy, can you see me?!”

“Yes!” The Tape recorder let out a surprised, and relieved sounding laugh that seemed like it turned into crying. “I was startin’ ta worry dat I’d never see ya again!”

“I’m here, Daddy” She hugged the tape recorder tightly, the shock of just having her father back outweighed all of the supernatural happenings around her. “I’m here...”

“Othas are down here too! your Uncle Sammy, Norman, Tom, Susie, pretty much everyone who’s eva worked at da studio!”

“What?! How?! And why?!”

“It’s Joey! He’s made some kind of... pocket torture dimension!”

Knowing where this was going and knowing that he was far too weak and frail to take down the amazonian woman of a handywoman himself, Joey opened the Ink Demon’s door and prayed it would come out and attack her. In the meantime, he himself fled into the animated studio just in case.

“SAMMY! LOOK OUT!” The living tape recorder warned as inky tendrils webbed all over the living room. “RUN!”

Sammy grabbed the pipe out of the pile of ink and charged.

“NO! NOT AT DA INK DEMON! AWAY FROM- Huh??”

Wally paused as he saw Sammy shove the Ink Demon off to the side and proceed to run after Joey.

“Sorry Daddy.” She said as she paused to set him down on the table. “But I’m gonna need both hands ta beat down dat sorry son of a bitch.”

“Go get ‘im tiger! I’m rootin’ for ya!”

While her small detour and Joey using his knowledge of the layout to his advantage managed to get some distance between them, the pipe wielding Valkyrie with murder in her eyes was quickly closing in on him.

“THIS IS FOR WHAT YA DID TO DADDY!”