#but im writing up the chapters as we speak
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you get me. you GET me. you get me so much i screamed when you laid down what you got. UGHHH. literally i hope to write more fics that will interest you because UGHHHHH you just get meeeeeeee its sooo goodddd
i also i too use girl as gender neutral sLAYYY.
I'm so happy you love the cargyll twins đ„șđ«¶đ«¶
The way we always see her as *herself*, beyond her ailment, beyond her concerns of putting up an act, both as a Hightower daughter and/or a Targaryen wife. She's just herself, without being worried that she's disappointing Otto or Daemon.
this is it. this is literally how i envisioned their dynamic to be yknow. when you commented on this once before i leapedddddd for joy it LEAPED really. you get me. you get meeee.
she's just a girl when she's with them. just a girl who loves to swim and pick flowers. did you actually sob cos of the scene with erryk? đ«đ«đ« but also... love that for me HAHAHAH.
(I don't even want to think about the fact that the last time she experienced something like this was probably in old town w gwayne when they were children)
dw. i like to think the sibs snuck out to go for a swim for the last time before she was married to daemon. to cheer her up yknow. alicent was there too <3
I love the way you portray Otto's relationship [...]
THISSSSSSSS. THISSSS. YOU JUST GET MEEEE T_T SCREAMING CRYING THROWING UP. I literally JUST ranted about this to my friend that everyone is like 'daemon is trying' WHAT ABOUT OTTO I WROTE HIM THAT WAY TOO AND YOU JUST đ«đ«đ«đ«đ« FUCKK YOU GETTT MEEEEEe
[...] with the reader because he's not black and white with his motives, only using his daughter to raise his House's standing. Rather, he's a complex character with layers, he's still a father - albeit a shitty one at that.
YOURE SOOOOOO ON POINT WITH EVERYTHING LITERALLYYYYYYYYYYYYY i thought it was really important to expound on this because DAEMON IS LITERALLY OTTO TO HER!!! BUT IN A WAY BETTER BECAUSE AT LEAST DAEMON IS CAPABLE OF SOME SORT OF AFFECTION. she's like 'ok my dad treats me this way, ergo my husband treating me this way is fine' !!!!!!!!!!!!!! this is so important fr fr because we accept the love we think we deserve.
He loves his daughter, in his own twisted way. How he ensures that she's not having a fit before dropping the baby bomb on her. He worries for her, knows her ticks.
đŻ no notes
But it's the way he uses his love and knowledge regarding her to get his own way and to get the reaction he wants out of her that's the most twisted.
THIS!!!!!! ok im so fucking excited i just want to tell you BUT ALL WILL BE REVEALED IN THE NEXT CHAPTER IVE BEEN BUILDING THIS SHIT UP FOR SO LONG IM SO FUCKING GLAD YOU CAUGHT ON IM GOING TO FUCKING CRY.
Also, I love how we're seeing mc slowly but surely starting to stand up for herself. WE LOVE GROWTH IM SO PROUD OF HER, I COULD CRY.
<3 but also..... who's gonna tell her (not me)
Day 173822 of begging daemon to just be normal for once in his life.
ur so me fr bestie
Honestly speaking, I was one of the few that voted for reader to prioritise herself and not go after either gwayne or daemon but ohh!!! I loved loved loved this scene.
đŁđŁđŁđŁđŁđŻđŻđŻ AS YOU SHOULD. AS YOU FUCKING SHOULD. I WAS AND AM STILL ACTUALLY VERY GAGGED THAT THAT POLL WOUND UP THAT WAY. SERIOUSLY CONSIDERING TOTALITARIANISM BECAUSE THIS DEMOCRACY AINT WORKING FOR ME CUZ WHAT DO YOU MEANNNNNN COMFORT DAD BOI DAEMON???????? YUCKKK i mean i get it but DAMNNNN?????
her whole arc with gwayne was rough. spolier? i dont plan on bringing him back at all so </3 if he comes back well đŹđŹ shits about to go down
ALSO DAEMON YOU LITTLE RAT,
HAHAHHAHAHHAHAH YOU LIKE ME FR FR FR I TOO CALL HIM RAT HAHAHAHAH AND EVERYONE ELSE THAT FUCKING PISSES ME OFF
YOU HAVE NO RIGHT BEING MAD AT MY GIRL FOR NOT BEING THERE WHEN YOU DEGRADED HER THE LAST TIME AND NOT IN THE SEXY WAY!!!!
đŹ yeesh fr.
Her telling him to speak what he wants and not twist his words is soooo real. YES GIRLL SET IT STRAIGHT WE DONT WANT EXTRA HEADACHES IN OUR LIVES!!
đŁđŁđŁđŁđŁđŁđŁđŁđŻđŻđŻđŻđŻđŻđŻđŻđŻ AGAIN AND AGAIN YOU GET ME YOU DONT MISSSSSSSS
I just remembered that she still thinks that night was a dream and I'm heartbroken again </3
dw. she'll find out it wasnt a dream.............. eventually
Pls daemon why do you have to choose aggression and rage every fucking time. Just be cute for once ugghhh.
UR LITERALLY ME FRRR HAHAHHAHHAHA
EVEN THE LINE YOU QUOTEDDDD i feared people might overlook it BUT YOU SAW. YOU GET ME. AND THATS MORE THAN ENOUGH.
I am so honored to have gotten your lovely reblog. i will 100% tag you my love. i'm glad you like my fic and my brain and my words. i love you so much. literally if there is something you want to see in this fic, just tell me and i'll make it happen for you fr fr.
Tormented Spirit | 7
Part 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8
"Is it such a sin to stand up for yourself?" you mutter as tears blur your vision. The way he reacted was visceral, instinctive even. "You never have to stand up for yourself ever again," says Daemon, reaching a hand to you, "come."
Daemon Targaryen x Hightower!Reader | 5k+ | cw: fem!reader, reader has brown hair, wife!reader, twin!Gwayne, arranged/forced marriage, canon divergence, alternate universe, slow burn, smut (cunnilingus, piv, choking, degradation, slight sadism), DD:DNE, panic/anxiety attacks, daddy issues/child abuse/family problems, mentions/depictions of mental/physical/psychosomatic illness, ye old misogyny, angst, typos, etc.
A/N: again the high valyrian is internet translated so lol. please consider leaving comments/reblogs because they really help me with the fic. might make another poll for next chapter stay tuned. | cross posted on ao3
@arabellasleopardcoat
Taking you to the hidden stream was simultaneously the best and worst decision Erryk's ever made in his life. The look of you was holy. His intense focus on your form was to ensure your safety, but, by the gods, it felt sinful to behold your dark hair and light fabric ebbing in the water.
He had hoped a swim would lift your spirits, just as flower picking did, but he did not know it would draw such a tempest out of you. It was as though you were reborn. You plunged into the water and shed all your inhibitions. Your voice became brighter, as did your eyes. You were flooded with more than a dozen memories of you and your twin swimming in the river near your home in Oldtown, and you recounted all of them so excitedly to Erryk.
"Oh!' you exclaim, flipping in the water to get to your feet. You point to something behind your ward, making him turn around. In that split second, you hold in your laughter and grab something from the mossy rocks. Innocently, you say, "that reminds me of something."
Erryk turns back to you, brows knit in confusion. When you you make your way towards him, he clenches his jaw and averts his gaze. The shift you were swimming in was stuck flush on your body, leaving little to his imagination. He was glad to have the foresight to bring you a change of clothes and a towel, and, my, was the pattern on the said towel so very interesting.
"What is a frogs favorite game?" you ask so suddenly.
Erryk turns to you, brows furrowing, "pardon?"
"Tell me the frogs' favorite game, ser," you repeat as though it was the most obvious thing in the world.
"Frogs favored game?" he repeats slowly, realizing now that your expression was mockingly innocent. He hums, "I cannot say I-"
"HOPSCOTCH!"
A frog comes leaping into Erryk's face, nearly causing him to topple as he dodges it. He's so flabbergasted by the turn of events, he calls out your name in offence. He is doubly offended by your laughter. His eyes go wide as you hunch forward, leaning on your knees.
"Villain," your ward mutters, scoffing far too many times.
You can barely catch your breath. You fan your face, "frog-ive me."
Erryk's face only contorts further.
"I could not-" you gasp for air, "could not help it."
In truth, if it was any other who did such a childish thing, he'd have shoved them in the water. Alas, you appeared only more beauteous as you made him a fool.
"Forgive me," you repeat in more serious manner, "Gwayne used to scare me this way often. I wished only to know how it felt, and now..." you giggle, "I can't say I blame my brother for constantly pulling tricks on me."
He huffs and shakes his head, "well. I'm glad to have pleased you, my ever-so-kind princess."
You offer him a guilty smile, "apologies."
Erryk shakes his head, "no. Truly. I am glad to see you in such a state."
You fidget with your fingers as a shiver runs down your spine.
He is quick to unravel your towel. He places it on your shoulders, "perhaps we should go back. The sunset is nigh."
You nod, taking your change of clothes from him next.
He turns around offering you your privacy. It takes a while, but you manage to dress yourself. Once you had your shoes on, you dry your hair with your towel and take his arm, "would you please lace up my dress?"
He nods, avoiding your gaze as he feels his face burn. He quickly laces you up then you return to the Keep.
You both had been laughing, up until you made it past the castle gates, promptly being silenced by the loud shout, "PRINCESS!"
Arryk runs over, charging for his brother. Their steel plates collide as Arryk yanks his twin, "where in gods name did you take her?"
Erryk furrows his brows, "we visited a stream-"
"The Keep is in disarray!" Arryk grits his teeth, hissing under his breath, "everyone's looking for her. Everyone."
You watch the twins huddle close and bicker. As it escalates, you try try to come between them, "Arryk. I was the one who asked him to take me outside the keep."
Arryk does not hear you at first, dead set on arguing with his twin. When you repeat your words the second time however, he turns to you, face softening a fraction. He knits his brows turning back to this brother, whispering something that makes Erryk turn to you with wide eyes, "fuck."
"Why?" you look at them in concern, "what it is?"
Arryk opens his mouth, but Erryk grabs his arm and says, "wait."
"There's no other way to say it," Arryk snaps, ripping his arm out his grip.
"Say what?" you knit your brows.
Arryk turns back to you, then lowers his gaze, "the queen... the queen has passed."
Your jaw drops. Your eyes widen. Your hand immediately covers your mouth. The three of you do not speak for a prolonged moment.
You feel your stomach roll, "w-what happened?"
"She could not deliver the babe herself. The maesters... had to intervene."
Intervene? You could not possibly understand what that could mean, and you find that you do not want to. You shake your head, "and her babe? Is- is her babe well at least?"
Arryk clenches his jaw, "she sired a prince named Baelon... he apparently grows weaker by the hour."
You feel bile rise up your throat.
"Your father and your siblings have been looking for you since news broke."
You shake your head, and gather your skirts.
"As has the prince."
Your face twitches at the thought. You do not delay and make your way inside the Keep.
As you tread the halls, you think about what the queen told you just mere hours ago. There is a sharp twinge in your belly as simultaneously remember how Aemma told you to go cheer for Daemon at the tourney and realize you will never hear a word from her ever again. The thought washes over you like water on the beach, sobering but thankfully not overwhelming.
You hadn't realized you had your head bowed until you hear your name called. You still as you look up, the twins halt behind you.
Otto marches over, brows and jaw tight as ever, "where in gods name have you been?"
You straighten your back as he stops before you, "I-"
"Your wards are double," he turns to the kingsguards, "and doubly useless, it seems."
"Father," you step into his line of sight, "do relieve your rage on them."
Your father turns back to you, expression softening a fraction at your referral. You had not called him father since your argument in the maester's office. He looks at youâ takes a good look at you and your sad eyes, your knit brows, your frowning lips. Your hair was darker than it was normally, and as he reaches out for it, he found it was, in fact, damp, "where have you been?"
"I..." you gulp and take a deep breath, "went swimming."
He releases your hair, tilting his head, "with whom? Gwayne has gone."
You pull your head back, "G-Gwayne's gone?"
"The tourney is over. The road is long. He has no reason to stay," Otto says.
Your brows tighten as you shake your head, "he... he didn't... wait for me?"
Otto watches your lips quiver. He watches your nose twitch. When your chest begins to visibly rise and fall, he shakes his head, "what did I tell you?"
You stare blankly at him.
He takes your hands, "what is it I always tell you?"
You clench your jaw and huff through your nostrils, "do not waste your tears on things you cannot change."
Otto rubs your knuckles as he shakes his head again. He gives the Cargyll brothers a look before walking off with you. They make sure to keep their distance before following after.
You turn to your father as he links your arm into his. You are certain, with how he cannot look at you, that he means to tell you something grave. You look front and mimic his demeanorâ distant, cold. You are his daughter, face and temperance.
"You enjoyed your swim at least?" he starts, "you are calm?"
You gulp, mentally preparing yourself for what will surely come next. Your voice still falters though, "ye-s."
Otto nods, still not turning to you, "many has occurred since your marriage to Daemon. You admitted you did not consummate your marriage on your wedding night and I was deeply concerned you would fail your duties in producing heirs, especially if your husband was not interested in you."
Your jaw clenches.
"But with the apparent... change of heart your husband has shown, you should know I've had the maesters closely monitor your state."
You knit your brows at that, "you mean my affliction?"
He speaks your name slowly before continuing, "as of yesterday, they have confirmed to me that you are with child."
You whip your head to him and pull away.
Otto does not look at you with the same sense of urgency.
"W-what?"
He sees the fear on your features. He offers a solemn expression and takes your cheeks when your eyes water, "this is good. You should delight, not tremble."
You try to speak but nothing coherent comes out.
"The Queen is dead. Go to your husband and comfort him with this news."
Your mouth goes dry and your father wipes the tears that fall from your eyes. He your name softly. Your sad face looks the exact same it did when his wife died. My baby is having a baby. He frowns and pulls away.
You try to take his hand, but he slips away.
"See her off," the Hand instructs your wards.
Erryk is quick to go to your side, whereas Arryk stares at the back of Otto's head, his lips curling as he did.
"Princess," Erryk says, cautiously reaching your arm.
You turn to him with wide eyes before scratching your tears away, "I-"
"Perhaps you should sit down first."
You pull away from him before he can touch you. The action makes Erryk pull back, an unsavory sensation spreading in his mouth and belly.
"I want to- Iâ" you take a breath, "I need to find-" you shake your head and begin speeding down the hall.
You were nearly about to break into a sprint, and your wards had to jog up to your side to keep up with you. You don't really know where you're going, but you're getting there, fast.
"Princess, please, slow down," one says.
You can feel your breath and your pulse in your ears.
"Princess."
You find yourself in the halls near one of the gate of the keep. The only reason why you stop is because you hear the voice of your twin. Your breath catches as you lurch towards the window. Gwayne was laughing with one of the guards, already on his horse. Your brows furrow, he couldn't possibly be well enough to be riding on horseback.
You realize quickly this is your last opportunity to go be with your brother, to pull him into an embrace, to worry on him, to tell him your worries, to kiss him goodbye. You know you have to act now and swiftly, but you cannot seem to move.
Your mind is heavy as you think about how your brother is set to leave regardless of your desire to keep close; he said it himself, his place can never be at your side. Though he is the only person who've ever relied on, you know nowâ you rub your belly, that can no longer be the case. There is only one person you can rely on now... yourself.
It is painful to pull away from the window, but you do, clenching your hands into fists before walking away.
You don't really walk away however, because then, you're frozen in place at the sight of your husband standing a few paces away from you, "Daemon."
He stares at you wordlessly.
You walk towards him, careful as you drag your feet.
He tilts his head and clenches his jaw, "he's leaving any moment now."
You nod, "I know."
"Go to him," he says softly.
"I-"
"Go to him!" he snaps.
You stiffen at his expression. You were adept with anger but he did not look angry. You stop in your tracks, trying to make sense of his restless figure.
Daemon watches you fidget with your fingers.
"If it is your command, I shall obey."
He chuckles dryly, pacing around his spot. He wipes his mouth then charges over, stopping just in front of you. He scoffs when you do not flinch, in disbelief of your constitution. His nostrils flare, "you know my feelings towards your twin."
You slowly shrug, "then you'll be glad to know I came looking for you."
Daemon does not move.
"You know how I feel about my brother..." you mutter, "but..." you lower your gaze, "I'm coming to terms with the fact I can no longer rely on him... it will be better this way."
It takes a moment, but Daemon chuckles. When you look up and his smirk fades. Your beady eyes make it hard to find satisfaction. "So, you will not go to him?" he asks.
You stare.
"You do not want to go to him?"
Your lips part.
He raises his brows.
"I... I do."
Anger rises up his belly, but as if on cue, the sound of horses and carriages moving is heard. You clench your jaw and lower you gaze to prevent yourself from looking back at the window. The prince cannot seem to win, for he should be pleased you did not see your brother off, and yet your sadness leaves sour jealousy in his mouthâ he was your husband.
The Cargyll twins look upon you both, appalled by the cruelty of the prince to keep you here as Gwayne leaves for good. Erryk in particular feels restless, unable to stop shifting and fidgeting with his scabbard.
"Shall... shall we go?" you mutter, slowly looking up.
Daemon watches you place a hand on his bicep. He responds only by following you after giving your wards a dismissive look.
The brothers turn to each other, each as unwilling as the other to leave you, but they do anyway.
Daemon is acutely aware of the warmth of your cheek against his arm as you tread down the halls. When, you arrive at your marriage chambers, Daemon opens the door and you notice the bandage wrapped around his hand. He struggles because of this. Once you're inside, you take his arm, eyes trained on his injury, "what happened to your hand?"
Daemon's eyes are fixed on the line between your brows.
"Did you break it?" you turn to him with furrowed eyes.
He pulls away slowly. He wants to know what you'd do next.
"Did you wrap it yourself? It's badly done."
He faintly snorts, "it's on my right hand."
"I'll do it for you," you say, walking towards the vanity.
Daemon follows, watching you procure scissors and vials and other things. You turn to him, motioning to the chair. He sits down, gaze fixed upon you as you take his arm again.
Your eyes are focused on undoing his wrap, "tell me if it hurts,"
His are fixed on your focused expression, "you should sit down."
"I'm fine."
"I want you to sit down," he uses his other hand to grab your wrist.
You stop and turn to him. You turn to the chair across the room but Daemon prevents you from doing so and simply spreads legs, pulling you between his thighs. Quickly, you are sat on his lap and tense look at him. He offers you his injured hand again as his other goes around you, clinging to your hip. He pulls you in, leaning his head against yours to say, "it's a cut, by the way."
You furrow your brows at his admission. You allow yourself a moment to relax before continuing your task. You find it is, in fact, a cut, deep and ugly, "did your lance splinter very badly?"
"No."
You furrow your brows deeper as you turn to him,
"This is glass."
"Glass?" you brow raise, "how did you hurt your hand with glass?"
Daemon licks his lips as he looks at yours. He shrugs, "I broke a bottle."
You pull your head back, "on accident?"
"On purpose," he tilts his head.
You huff and start cleaning his wound, "was the violence in the tourney insufficient?"
He chuckles through his nostrils, "I did not fucking win."
You smear balm on his wound. You do not reply.
It makes him clench his jaw, "and you..."
"..."
"You were not there."
You do not tear your gaze from his injury.
He grumbles, "did you even hear me?"
You lift your gaze then raise brow at him, "you did not want me there. Do you not recall how you cursed at me?"
Your gall makes anger rise up his throat.
You continue wrapping up his hand.
"Well, you were being a bitch," he snaps.
"Why?"
His brows furrow.
"Why was I being a bitch?"
"..."
You spare him a quick glace.
He pulls his head back, "... what?"
"Did I not do my duty?" you turn to him, face blank, "I followed you, congratulated you, inquired of your injuries. I submitted to your desires. Where did I err?" You ask in earnest, "what do you want from me?"
His face contorts. Now that he was faced with such an opportunity, he finds himself unable to speak. What did he want from you?
You wait for him to reply. You prepare yourself for preposterous requirements but you are met only his silence. In that moment, you remember he was just a man. Many a man enjoyed making women suffer. You gulp, thinking about your father.
Perhaps your father was lying. Perhaps he wants you to believe you are with child to get even. After all, Daemon never... finished in you. How then could you be with child?
You secure the binding on his hand, "it is finished."
Daemon does not bother looking at his hand.
"How do you feel?"
He feels a strong urge to shake you... to pull you close.
"My deepest sympathies for the death of your cousin."
He freezes. Right. The queen was dead. He lowers his gaze.
You frown and reach for his cheek. You second guess however and bring your palm to his shoulder instead, "I am here for you, my prince."
His eyes meet yours.
"I am here to care and comfort you."
He leans back, taken by the thought.
You drink in his demeanor, the softness in his eyes, the tension that falls of his shoulders. You release a breath, "if that is what you desire, speak plainly, and do not repel me. Do not ask me to leave if, in fact, you want me to stay."
His throat tightens. He feels like he is ensnared in a bear trap. He rips at his collar, "I... I have other injuries." He pushes you off and paces around as he undoes his top. It is a struggle for him, but he cannot stop or stay still, "cuts and bruises."
You watch as he fidgets and slowly walk over.
"I don't-"
"Daemon."
He stills.
You come in front of him and undo his top yourself. You drop it mindlessly, and once he is bare, he feels conscious under your scrutiny for some reason. You brush your fingers on his ribs, making goosebumps form on his skin. He can't say that that has ever happened to him before. You notice and rub his arms, eyes locked on his torso.
He feels himself getting hard.
"Did you tend to these yourself as well?" you brush over a cut on his hip.
Oh. You were still examining him. He only hums in response.
You frown, "did no maester come to your tent?"
"I..." he starts.
You circle around him, inspecting for other injuries.
"...wanted you to come to my tent."
You come to his side. He finds the frown on your face. You take a moment before saying, "you tended to your wounds well at least."
"I want you."
You nod, "I will tend to youâ"
Daemon takes your nape, lowering his head to kiss your lips. It takes a moment for you to relax, and his belly burns at the sound you make when you do. Your hands come to his sides and your nails graze faintly into his flesh.
He pushes you back until your laid on the bed beneath him. His kisses trail down your skin as he works to get you naked. He kisses your shoulder, then your sternum. He makes sure to lick your breast and leave a mark on your rib before peppering kisses down your belly.
Your breath grows heavy when he lingers by your womb, sucking kisses on your skin. Your throat tightens think of your father's words again. It makes you tense, and Daemon feels it. Of course, he doesn't know about your conversation with Otto, and thinks your tension comes from your self-consciousness.
You lift your head, pulling a pillow beneath it, and look down at your husband. You reach for him, tangling your fingers in his silver hair, "Daemon."
He hums, nipping your flesh in response.
You try to sit up, "D-Daemon, I-"
He shushes you, pushing down on your hip bone. He looks up at you, muttering something in High Valyrian.
"Please, Daemon, wait-"
"Be still," he says, violet eyes hooded, "do I not take care of you?"
Your breath hitches as he sinks down.
"Do you not enjoy my mouth?"
"I- that's not-"
"Do you or do you not?"
"I... I doâ"
You are not able to speak after he buries his face between your thighs. You are reduced to breathy cries and a twisting spine. Daemon, though he continues to hold you down, relishes every second of it and feasts more ardently. He sighs, securing your thighs on his shoulders, nudging his face deeper into you, his nose brushing against your pearl.
He relishes how quickly your wetness builds, and soon, he feels your arousal dribbling down his chin. He moans, nails biting crescent moons into your skin. Your belly rises and falls in sync with the crescendo of your mewls. At this point, both your hands are tangled into his hair, and your pulling and scratching only further inspires his tongue.
You call out his name, screwing your eyes shut as you throw your head back and arch your body. Quickly, your belly tightens and you sequentially dig your heels into his shoulder blades. He squeezes your thighs enough to make them bruise, and yet the pain is what pushes you into orgasm, garnering a lewd and loud sound from your mouth.
Daemon hums, lifting his face just enough to see yours as he brings you to peak. He moans at your expression, grinding his hips into the cushion, desperate for friction.
Your body trembles, unable to settle as his burning mouth persists on your molten mound. You begin to squeak and he catches the moment you open your eyes to look at him all teary. It drives him mad. With a deep inhale, he pulls away, wiping his chin before he undoes his breeches.
You relax and catch your breath, hands dropping to your sides.
Daemon watches you, your trembling legs glistening with the pleasure he's drawn out. He can feel himself throbbing in his pants. You watch as he hastily frees himself. Though your head was hazy and your body was tried, your belly burned at sight of the sticky liquid dripping down your husband's neck.
"Fuck, Daemon," you reach for his belly. You trace his defined muscles with your finger tips. He snatches your hands when he finally pushes his pants down.
You squeak when he pushes you to your side, one hand on your shoulder, another hiking your leg up by the knee. You whine as he folds you into the sheets just before sliding his hardened cock in your wet cunt.
He hisses, leaning down to your neck. His words are hot against your skin, but you understand nothing.
Whatever tenderness he had before was gone, now he was just fucking you like a rabid animal. Daemon could not help himself, he loved how supple and pliable you were, and twists you into a form that keeps you prone. When the bed begins to creak because of his thrusts, he holds you down where your neck and collarbone meet. He puts enough pressure to restrict your breathing, but not enough to choke out your pretty noises.
At some point, he decides your leg is getting in the way and pushes you flat on your chest. He then gathers you by the hip, hiking you up enough to fuck you nicely from behind.
His thrusts are more intense now. You scream into the cushion as you find your elbows. Before you can prop yourself up though, he's pinning you down by the shoulder, saying something in High Valyrian again.
"D-Daemon," you whine, left cheek smushed against your pillow. You could feel your next climax building quickly.
He responds by rubbing your clit, drawing tears and another scream out of you because of your sensitivity.
You feel yourself helplessly clenching and unclenching around him, absolutely boneless under his vigorous intrusion. You could feel your knees slipping but Daemon's grip on you would not see you move from your position. Your toes curl. Saliva drips out your open mouth.
"MÄzigon va, riña," he snorts, "sepÄr mirrÄ« angotan tolÄ«." Come on, girl. Just a little bit more."
You do not understand, so you only whine out, "Daemon."
Daemon growls and rubs one side of your ass, "you're doing so good for me."
He spanks you, but that's not what makes your eyes open.
"Milk my cock with your tight cunny, come slut."
You begin to grit your teeth.
"I want to see my seed dripping down your thighs," he groans, mind unable to focus on anything but the hot, wet slapping of your skin.
It's unsurprising that you come first, as Daemon always assures you do to underscore his control and dominance over you. He yelps out a sharp fuck, nearly coming in your cunt because of how your body seizes up around him. Your orgasm overwhelming, yet your eyes water for more than this reason. His words make you aware your husband sees you nothing more as a vessel for pleasure, and your pleasure is regretfully cut short because of how sharply he pulls out, his load spraying on your already dripping labia and pubic hair.
He strokes himself a few times, feeling his cock twitch in his hand as he watches your mixed come trickle down your legs. He sighs, "fuck," then scoops the cream in two fingers, plunging it in and out your still spasming cunt.
You squeal when he finger fucks you, body unable to remain upright. You are grateful he loses interest rather quickly and crumble into the bed as he stands.
You watch him walk over to the drawer, where he then pours himself some wine. You gulp, remembering your dream from last night. It sobers you out your high. You clench your jaw and roll over to clean yourself up. You head to your vanity and wipe yourself down, grabbing your robe was you do.
Daemon, whose thirst was now quenched, turns back to you with a towel. He is confused to see you standing. He watches you flip your hair behind you, pulling it out of your robe, which you then secure around yourself. He knits his brows as he walks over, "what are you doing?"
You turn to him, sitting on the vanity chair, "getting ready for bed."
Daemon stares, and you take his prolonged silence as an indication to proceed with your nightly routine.
The prince squeezes the damp towel in his hand as he watches you brush your hair. You catch his stillness from the mirror and turn back to him, "oh."
You drop your brush and take the towel from him, "I'll help you clean up."
Normally, he enjoyed this, but right now, he can't. He is offended when you begin to pick up his clothes, so much that he scoffs, "the fuck are you doing?"
You halt midway picking up his trousers. You stand and turn to the closet, "ah. Did you want new clothes?"
He pulls his head back, no longer offended, but hurt, "you want me to leave?"
You are caught off guard by his question. You stare at him for a moment, unsure if he was serious. You could not identify his expression, so you did not know if you tell him the truth. You would not survive being berated after confessing you wanted to sleep with him. You dodge the answer altogether, "weren't you leaving anyway?"
Daemon's cheeks tense. He huffs, stepping forward, yanking his clothes out of your hands, "no."
You are bewildered by his actions, for to you, his actions are sudden. You are petrified in fear, which is why you instinctively begin to apologize, "f-forgive me, I-I-"
His nostrils flare and his jaw sets.
"I-" you motion with a hand, "- you always leave."
His clenches his jaw, "do you want me to leave?"
"Iâ" your throat tightens and soon you can no longer look at him. You want to beg him to stay, but you recall how you did that with your father, and your mother, and your brotherâ begging does not make people stay. You whisper, "I... I'm terrified."
When you lift your gaze, Daemon shirks and decided to dress. He gulps as he pulls his trousers up, turning back to you. He clenches his fist before reaching out for you.
Your heart races as he takes your hand.
"You've served me well. If you are terrified... I'll leave you."
You whimper when he pulls away, holding him tighter than he did before your hands part. Your lips quiver. He knits his brows. You shake your head, "I- I... I do not want you to go."
He is taken off guard by how you suddenly embrace him.
"Please," you beg, though you knew it would not serve you well, "stay."
He turned to stone. He cannot seem to move at all but your arms are determined to stay around him. You begin to weep against his skin and he can feel your breath grow ragged. Only then does he manage to return your affection.
He brushes your dark hair away from your face and cradles you against him.
"Daemon."
He leans into you, enough to be able to brush his cheek against yours, "kesan umbagon." I will stay.
You sniffle then sigh. After a while, you ask, "what does that mean?"
"I will stay."
You sigh again, pulling away to look at him. You offer him a sad smile, "thank you."
He frowns, wiping your tears.
When you go back to bed, you offer him space in case you've made him uncomfortable. He stares at you, awaiting your embrace. You are mere inches apart but it feels like yards and yards.
"Good night, husband," you say before turning over.
He chuckles dryly, staring at your dark hair. He turns to the ceiling, "good night."
#prettybiching cutie#prettybiching my beloved#tormented spirit#daemon targaryen x reader#daemon smut#you can have my heart#n my kidney
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Pairing: Chan x fem!reader (zombie apocalypse au) Word count: 1.2k Warnings: none
A/N: im trying to get back into writing so we're starting off small... real small but it's ok im almost done with some bigger works i want to get posted by the end of the week so... we'll see enjoy :)
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Chapter 5
Seonghwa hit the ground. Hard. His ears were ringing. His body ached. He sat up slowly, eyes drawn to the blaze that illuminated his face and engulfed the building he'd just been in. An explosion..
It was an explosion.
An explosion. Just an explosion.
Then he heard the screams followed by a sound horror movies could only dream of recreating. The sound of tearing flesh and cracking bones.
Seonghwa turned to the sound.
it was on her, a young woman, no older than he was, her phone had fallen to the ground as she dialed 112..
The operator's voice came out muffled.
And that thing on her, bit her throat and tore the flesh from her neck.
Too stunned to speak or move he backed up slowly. More screams.
And one ran right past him lunging for a teacher who was calling the police. He scrambled to his feet.. and ran. Ran until he realized looking at one of those things biting people... it was his biology teacher. She turned to him and trilled softly before shrieking and making a mad dash for him.
Seonghwa didn't have time to scream before a man with big eyes and small lips swung a baseball bat at whatever had become of his teacher.
It fell to the ground writhing head backwards. Still making a weak attempt to crawl for the young men.
The man grabbed Seonghwa and wrenched him to his feet, shoving a headless gold club into his hands. "Don't breathe in the smoke! RUN!"
Seonghwa stared at the zombies roaming through the woods. Was it the explosion...
"Hwa.."
He looked over his shoulder at you, "Hey."
"You thinking of something.."
"No." Seonghwa shook his head before raising a brow at you. "What did you tell Chan?"
"As much as he needed to know.." you sighed.
"Which is?"
You looked at him. "Not the whole truth-"
"Y/n!"
"Do you want him to think we're murderers?" You whisper shouted. "We're already on the rocks with him Hwa! One mess up and he could kick us out or worse."
"It's not that different..."
"What?"
"You're a human being! You made mistakes but you'll live! He's not Hongjoong. He's not going to kill you for looking at him the wrong way." the man hissed angrily.
Jisung perked up from the bushes so suddenly Seonghwa pointed his rifle at him.
"Woah!" The chubby cheeked man put his hands up. "IT'S ME! CALM DOWN!"
Seonghwa exhaled slowly, and lowered his gun. "what?"
"I found a boar. We can head back now.."
You nodded.
As you began walking back to the base, Jisung turned his head looking at a tree.
"What is it?" You asked, leaning back to look at what he was staring so intently at.
There was a mark in the bark of the tree. A very deliberate mark. Carved in the shape of a compass looking object.
"it's nothing!" Jisung smiled at you. "Something I made a while back."
Seonghwa glanced at you. He's lying.. his expression screamed.
"It's nice." You said, patting Jisung on the shoulder before glancing at the taller man, your eyes shouting Trust him! back.
You returned to the base to find Hyunjin running away from Minho as the latter chased him with a fork.
"Y/N!" Hyunjin hid behind you, peeking around you as Minho tried to find a way around you to stab him.
"CALM DOWN!" You tried to calm the older man but he sprinted around you, sending Hyunjin squealing like a little girl as he ran away from you and down the hall.
You pursed your lips. "Wh-"
"Hyunjin called him dumb." Seungmin said simply.
You snorted.
Jisung ran after Minho and Seonghwa shook his head before sitting at the table looking at what Changbin was working on.
"ENOUGH!" You heard Chan bellow, they'd woken him up it'd seemed.
Both Minho, Jisung, and Hyunjin tore through the hall running for their lives as a very angry, very sleepy Chan stood at the entrance to the hall, slipper in hand.
You tilted your head at him.
He looked at you and lowered the slipper. "You guys catch anything..?"
Yeosang bit his lip. "You know we can't be out right now Wooyoung."
"When else would we talk about it? San breathes down my neck all day. Hongjoong and Eunbi are keeping you close like a dog in the evening." Wooyoung put his head in his hands and rubbed his face.
Yeosang looked at his hands. "I thought they were dead... I thought-"
"You thought wrong!" Wooyoung snapped. "Think about it. Would Y/n just really jump into a river moving that fast without a plan?!"
"He was going to kill them!"
Wooyoung bit his lip and looked at Yeosang. "They saved our lives multiple times. Why want them dead..."
"You know Hongjoong-"
"But what about the others. Mingi. San!"
Silence.
"You know you're the only person who can make San see reason."
"We need to send them a message... That Eunbi might know where they are. And that they need to run before Hongjoong gets to them."
"He would never hurt Y/n."
"But he might kill Seonghwa." Wooyoung looked at the hallway.
"How will we reach her?"
"The plane... they want it.. We'll be there."
"Be where?" a soft voice said.
Both men jumped.
"Eunbi!" Yeosang grabbed his chest.
"Why are you so scared?" She tilted her head. "Discussing something you shouldn't? Past curfew?"
Wooyoung resisted the urge to swallow in fear. "No... just talking about.. Y/n. We'll be there at the plane." He glanced at Yeosang.\
"To help Hongjoong catch her and that traitor...." the other man added.
"I see.." She smiled.
Both men directed their gaze to the ground to avoid staring at the scarring on her face.
"Get to bed. I won't tell Hongjoongie of your... meeting."
Wooyoung nodded as she turned away. "G'night Eunbi.."
"Goodnight boys."
Thhe two men looked at each other before walking to their separate rooms.
"You can't be serious." Chan brushed his fingers over the compass mark and looked at Minho, Jisung, and Changbin.
"it's fresh." Jisung said shaking his head.
"She's looking for us." Minho bit his lip and glanced at Changbin.
"Let her come then." The muscular man said in almost a growl.
"Changbin.." Chan looked at his friend. "Next time she's not gonna miss. It's not worth the risk."
"How do you know she doesn't want to apologize...?" Jisung started. "And join us again..."
"You think she'll be happy to see Y/n and just want to join us with another girl?" Chan growled.
Jisung looked down.
"She can take this." Minho pulled out his knife and stabbed the carved compass, slashing it across the face. "We got the damn message."
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© 2024 xxkissesforchanniexx. DO NOT COPY OR TRANSLATE MY WORK .á
#ăâ writesă#skz#skz x reader#bang chan#stray kids#stray kids x reader#bangchan#bangchan x reader#bang chan x reader#zombie apocalypse#zombie au
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âł With Summer finally here, you find yourself wondering what awaits for you. Will you finally find some peace after closing the gate? Can you find a way to figure out how Steve feels about you? Is there a way to get a good tan going from working at the community pool? Thereâs so much questions that you have to answer. Letâs just ignore the small things. Like the fact that Billy wonât stop acting weird, Dustin has recorded a Russian transmission, and the crazy chemistry thatâs sparkling between Steve and his new coworker, Robin Buckley. Should be easy, right?Â
A/N: This is a continued story line of adopted cousin!Henderson to keep it open for inclusive purposes. No description will be mention nor will there be use of names.Â
RATING: M |  PAIRINGS: Steve x Reader (Friends to Lovers), EX!Billy x Reader  ft. Canon Relationships (s3) | WC: TBD | WARNINGS: Cursing, Angst, Canon Violence, Slow Burn, Smut***
CHAPTER: ONEÂ *** CHAPTER: TWO CHAPTER: THREE CHAPTER: FOUR CHAPTER: FIVEÂ *** CHAPTER: SIX CHAPTER: SEVEN CHAPTER: EIGHT CHAPTER: NINE CHAPTER: TEN CHAPTER: ELEVEN CHAPTER: TWELVE
UPDATES:Â COMPLETED
#steve harrington fanfic#steve harrington x reader#steve harrington x henderson!reader#steve harrington x female reader#steve harrington x you#steve harrington smut#steve harrington fic#stranger things fanfic#stranger things fic#cb#stranger verse#this isn't gonna begin till about april since the week is almost over#but im writing up the chapters as we speak
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chapter 8 is done!!! wooo fireworks yeahhh!!! god that took so long someone kill me. anyways gonna edit it and then we're good to go gang :)
#sophie speaks#series:www#dont even know if its good but here we are lmfao#its like this whenever i finish a chapter tbh#and this one was once again sad but like NEXT CHAPTER FOR REAL GUYS#like first thing you do is buy flowers and then call molly youre gonna have some fun i swear#i. do not know why im built like this lmao#'i need to write something happy' immediate angst cues#look you had to make up your mind first and i needed a catalyst for that!!! so im using jason as ur foil again#hes a useful tool okay. something something soulmates again or whatevers
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you may think my original story about a repressed sapphic genderqueer werewolf girl came about as a result of my teen wolf obsession. you would be wrong. in truth my teen wolf obsession came about as a result of me writing an original story about a repressed sapphic genderqueer werewolf girl and wanting to immerse myself in more werewolf media to aid the writing process, which backfired when i proceeded to get so into teen wolf i almost completely lost interest in the beloved wolfgirl that started it all.
#roz rosalind my beloved fucked up tormented babygirl i love you so much im planning a rewrite of your story as we speak#which will definitely be better than continuing with the ten chapters i already wrote yes 100%#this has always worked for me in the past (it hasnt)#magpie thoughts#magpie's writing adventures#the wolf#magpie's teen wolf experience
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an excerpt from my unnamed & heavily unfinished lyney fic:
Thin, frail hands reached out to grab hold of the brass knob that was cold to the touch, slowly twisting and pushing open the grand doors. Their deafening sound disrupts the unperturbed silence of the other room. At first, Lyney is hesitant to continue further in. The lack of human presence indirectly urged him to turn back and find Lynette.
However, as his curious eyes wander across the hall that appears to stretch on for what seemed like several miles, he unknowingly finds himself walking forward. The plush carpet below softening his footsteps as he gazes in awe at the roomâs emanate opulence: pedestals where pristine ceramic vases sat upon holding flowers, modest paintings of pleasant fields or mountains of solitude, and the array of tall windows that filter in ample sunlight through draping curtains.
Though he walks a good distance away from such novel furnishings, he continues to remain careful for the unknown fear that he may accidentally knock something over. Forget damagingâhe may as well leave a stain on this place with his own breath.
Wavering footsteps eventually recede to a halt as his eyes catch sight of a particular painting.
Gilded in gold, it depicts a woman elegantly sitting upon a throne. Her black gloved hands rest leisurely upon her lap, contrasting her straight and refined posture. Rose gold hair styled in a loose braid that falls seamlessly down her shoulder, complimenting her poised sea-green eyes. Though she displayed a cordial smile akin to that of a loving mother, something about her gaze unsettled Lyney. Like it held a glint of rancor that most would not perceive.
Stationed beside this painting, was another more distinguishable portrait. It portrayed yet another woman of equal eminence, if not more. But even at a mere glance, it was obvious she held more eccentricities about her. She sat upon the throne as though it were any other seat: one leg crossed over the other and cheek languidly resting upon her hand, further emphasizing her impartial demeanor. Layered black and white hair that extends almost down to her shoulders on one side andâher eyes.
They are not ones Lyney has ever seen before. Black as a moonless night with striking red pupils shaped like âXâs.â Compared to the previous woman, this one evidently held a more daunting presence, even within the confines of a painting. Yet despite such looming authority, something about her held more sincerity. For what exactly, Lyney has no clue.
All he knows is that should he ever come face to face with such a woman, he would undoubtedly take her words as they are, without question.
Gradually peeling his eyes away from the paintings, Lyneyâs gaze then landed upon another item of interest, one that stood at the center of the room and that heâs surprisingly failed to notice until nowâa grand piano.
Approaching the instrument, Lyneyâs eyes examine its spotless condition. Free of any marks or scratches as his fingers gently grazed along the black and white keys before taking a seat. He plays one note, and then another, the soft sound managing to echo throughout the entire hall. He definitely shouldnât be touching this, his mind tells him. Though his actions speak otherwise. Slowly positioning his hands on the keys, Lyney begins to play.
Itâs a melancholic tune that plays, but one so cathartic it brings the world to a standstill. He was never one to find great enjoyment in playing such an instrument. Lynette had often told him to put such talents to greater use, perhaps performing in the grandest of stages like the Opera Epiclese, but Lyney never indulged those possibilities.
Such an opportunity should only be granted to those who have a true passion for playing a beautiful instrument like the piano. Not someone like him who only used it as a means to get by.
âWhat are you doing?â A stringent voice cuts through the somber melody, immediately making Lyneyâs hands flinch away from the keys and head dart at the person standing a few feet away. Their expression mirrored their tone of voice: cold and apathetic. Had they been here this entire time?
Upon receiving no response, their eyes narrow at him. âWho are you and what are you doing here?â
âLyney!â He blurts out immediately, shooting up from his seat that almost knocks over the stool behind him. He winces a bit at the commotion heâs now caused. âI meanâmy name. My name is LyneyâŠâ
â...Lyney?â The person repeats, voice dripping with doubt and ready to suspect him of hiding his true identity. But then thereâs a pause and Lyney watches as their face morphs from a look of ponder to a scowl before they speak again. âOh. So youâre the one âFatherâ talked about bringing in.â
#ââ ê°đê±Ű đ±đȘđŻđŻđŠđ„ đ”đ©đ°đ¶đšđ©đ”đŽ đ°đŻ đȘđŻđŹ .á#woohoo new tag for my random writing vomits!#im thinking of potentially documenting my journey of writing this fic on here by posting random snippets/previews of stuff i come up âŠ#*with#during the whole process that is trying to figure out how the hell this story will play out#hypothetically speaking this excerpt comes from the unofficial chapter two part of the series#i thankfully have a few things established already both character + world building wise annd one example is that in this story âŠ#the house of the hearth serves as both a palace of sorts and an orphanage meaning yes this is a royal au but are we surprised fr#instead of just being director of the orphanage they are also rulers themsleves of a kingdom i have yet to determine#previews acensions works similar to how it was hinted at in arleâs animation short but changed under the new director#the details of which iâm still in the process of brainstorming! hmm other random details to include: its a lyney x reader fic obv#an enemies to lovers dynamic lots of potential angst and drama yippee#thatâs about all i can say for now because well..thats all i have atmđso hereâs to day 1 of yuomiâs lyney fic journey~
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respect for the fact that jean had to be one of the most outgoing in the 104h cadet corps.
#out of.#when u look at the earlier chapters he rlly just hangs out with so many ppl i love it#my dude spends more time with RBA then he does connie and sasha from like chapter 12-17#then you see him play around with tht random cadet rather than actually pay attention to actual combat fightin ...#then u have the cadet who was aptly named as envious of jean in the character book too ...#im not an outgoing person which makes it nicer when i write as a character who is at least somewhat nice to ppl hes just met#unless they get on his nerves.#i rlly could talk all day about the jean being a softie but we would be here. all day.#he grows to care more for his closer friends ... gets betrayed by some ... but its clear hes still sociable. hes the one floc.he etc#approach first when they switch over to the scouts . the first to speak back and humour with them too ...#me holdin the list of good things jean does up like a poster: sir he did nothing wrong#trying to write but 40 hours week take it out of u man
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She's gonna kick my ass when she gets home i just know it
#aslinn rambles#speak up boys!#Thank yall for your patience!!!#This chapter is hard#And the week started off really strong and now im in the waiting limbo hell till the end of the week#So imma go make more food than planned and bake more stuff than i should#Rip my roommate bc she is gonna have leftovers for days on end#We barely just finished the chocolate mousse and apple sauce and double chocolate pie from last week#Writing#Wip#fan fiction
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every other day i keep telling myself "i should get back to vnc! i miss noe" and then i dont
#snow speaks#you know the tragedy that is my stupid brain going'aha! we have reached where we wanted to be! now we will stop :)'#like ??? HELLO READ THE REST OF WHERE YOU WANTED TO BE???#the same thing happened when i was reading blue period and i got to the yotasuke arc and went OURGH. and decided to perish in flames instea#of reading.#anyways! noe.beautiful boy with a very pretty voice (i watched the dub his voice is v soothing to my brain lol)#... also didnt finish the dub! (got to ep 3 and went hmmm manga seems nice now. reads instead)#but yeah damn i wanted to read the chloe arc so bad but then i got midway and went â and ran off to fe again weeheehee#maybe writing this ill read one chapter T - T im also just not good at getting into material thats still ongoing lolol#i dont like the idea of catching up and waiting bc ill forget about it lolol
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I think my favorite thing abt this rewrite so far is that I get to write everyone as they are at the very beginning (mentally unstable) and things only get worse from there <3
#by everyone i mean shiro and adam btw#shiro's repressing his way through the entire first few chapters and adam is on the verge of a full psychological breakdown <3#for some context: shiro adam and matt (and some ocs) were a team of pilots (a flight) for like. literally forever.#since the early garrison days.#theyre close knit theyre fambly they love each other etc#shiro was the flight leader and adam was his wingmate but after shiro 'died' adam became the leader#and the whole team got shuffled around to compensate for the lost 2 members#and now adam has to lead the ppl he's grown up with while also dealing with all the grief and guilt#and also iverson's shit (of which there is much) and also the stress of keith running away to live in the desert etc etc#and all this time. he has to take care of his flight and keith while he just has this feeling deep down that shiro and matt arent dead#or at least that he doesnt have the full story of what happened to them#and bro is hanging on by a singular thread and then keith disappears AGAIN and this time there's no way to know where he went#and the last thread Snaps <3 and we enter what i fondly like to call adam's Breakdown Era <3#anyway every time i write in his pov im giggling and twirling my hair he is soooooooo unwell <3#winter speaks#quintenary stars series
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we have officially hit 50 outlined chapters
#nickell speaks!#nickell writes!#mirror's edge catalyst#IM STILL NOT DONE#THE OTHER DAY MY BRAIN WAS LIKE âWHAT IF WE EXTENDED THE FIC TO NOW HAVE THIS ENDINGâ#which on one hand is fine because iâd wanted to use that ending when i originally came up with a plot#and i do think itâs fitting and all that (itâs a good ending dw. faith has been through enough)#but like. i have 50 chapters outlined already and a TON of audio logs and documents to outline too#that said i finally came up with a name for the fic which is nice
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#i gotta tell yâall iâm working on another fic of course#mainly bc i have a couple of weeks until school starts and i really wanna get out as much as i can before i have to focus#but anyway#girldad! jamie au#the outline alone is 1200 words#iâm at the beginning of chapter 3 rn and itâs 7300 words already#as of rn the plan is 15 chapters#i have no word count expectation other than long#anyway so iâll be posting this once iâm fully finished writing it or on the last couple of chapters since iâll be releasing it bit by bit#and then after that i have a little canon established relationship fic i wanna put out#and then i also have fake dating au that i reaaaaallg wanna write#n also like maybe two other short ones#n then my nastiest piece of work grumpy neighbor au maybe one day my beloved you will be written#edit; okay im about to write the baby shower scene :â)#edit; i just wrote the birth n the first roy intro :)#the next couple of chapters will be like snapshots of the babyâs first yesrs until we meet up into like the present day so to speak#also itâs at 12k words
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i apparently lied molly is NOT going to appear in the next chapter but jason will. no i do not know what im doing. i may write outlines but they like appear in the story after so much fucking meandering oh my god
#sophie speaks#series:www#this guy keeps popping up why is he here#yes i am writing a fic about him but like hes not supposed to be here#god i wish my brain worked#this is too hard#T-T#one day this chapter will be done and then the next one will take 7 months im sure but yknow by the time we're all like 500 years old and#part robot im sure ill finish arc 1 of what we want#kill me#just fuckin. fuckin try :))
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episode eight: the battle of starcourt
He fights with it, tries desperately not to let it fall, all while his resume hangs from his mouth. âShit! Oh, Fast Times! Ever heard of it? Top three for me, Keith.â Robin laughs and Steve turns the cardboard cutout to you, wiggling his eyebrows. âOwn any red bikinis?â You flick his forehead, though you laugh as well. âIn your dreams.â âI can sleep right now and find outââ âI will flick you again.â âA kiss is preferred, but whatever.â
Summary: jonathan becomes a certified surgeon, hopper returns and is oddly sentimental (wonder what that could mean !), you and dustin show off your musical theater talents, the mind flayer becomes a track star, fireworks become weapons, and really a lot just happens so suddenly it gives you whiplash. dont worry though, the rest of your summer involves painful goodbyes and the scary realization that youre growing up. absolutely disgusting. but at least steve gets to kiss you whenever now, so hooray for that ! side note: you keep making promises to people, surely there wont be narrative foreshadowing as a result !
Rating: general, violence and swearing
Warnings: blood, swearing, major character death, graphic depictions of violence, fem!reader, use of y/n
Words: 21.2k (ouch)
Before you swing in: this was my magnum opus. truly. so so so much happens in this chapter, this episode is INSANE. it took me a while, the scenes were hard and complex, but im happy with the final results :) ive been waiting a long time to write this ending, to set up the strings for later in season 4 <3 i sincerely hope this chapter is all yall have wanted. if theres any glaring typos, pls ignore because its 21.2k words and im weak from rereading it. anyways, i have a sneaky lil link right here that will make sense at the end of the chapter (spoiler alert: it's a mixtape jonathan makes for bug). enjoy !
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Elâs screams tear out of her body. She writhes in pain, sobs claw out of her throat. Itâs unbearable to watch, the sight of her in immeasurable pain. It breaks your heart.Â
No one knows what to do.Â
Mike thrashes in your arms still. He tries to escape your hold so that he can cover his body with Elâs. Take away her pain somehow. But you wonât let him. You know that it hurts him to see her this way, but his panic will only drive Elâs panic further.
âWhat is that?â Disgust litters Ericaâs face as she stares at the moving creature within Elâs leg. Gently you push the girl away, not wanting to crowd El too much. She needs space to breathe.Â
âThereâs something in her leg,â Mike sneers into your face as he fights against you again. Heâs furious, heâs overwhelmed, he just wants to help. âLet go!â
Your arms tighten around the boy. He isnât in the right state of mind. Frantic, you look to your left and start forming a plan. âJonathan, my switchblade is in my left back pocket. Grab it.â He stares at you, unsure what to do, and you raise your voice into a yell. âGrab it.â
Jonathan jumps at the command and his hand disappears behind you. You feel him find the weapon and pull it out. He holds it in front of you, offering it, but you donât accept it. âGo and disinfect it. Thereâs a gas stove where you found us. Heat up the blades so that we canââ you swallow as nausea fills you. âWeâwe have to cut it out of her leg.â
The moment Jonathan is gone, you turn your attention to Mike and Steve. You try to keep your voice leveled, try to contain the blinding panic that screams in your head. El needs you right now. Swallowing again, you start to speak to them. âI need you guys to talk to El. Keep her awake.â
âRight, okay.â Mike nods, and you finally release him. He hovers over El, his voice is gentle as he tries to calm her. âHey, stay awake, okay?â
You tug Steve towards Elâs legs so that he can help you move her into a better position. âGet her onto her side. Mike, put her head in your lap.â
Both boys do as theyâre told. Everyone watches, and Robin tries to make light of the situation. She rambles about a girl from her soccer team who once broke her leg. How the bone had ripped clean through her skin. The story makes you shiver, and Steve sees the discomfort. âRobin, hey. Youâre not helping.â
âIâm sorry.â
Jonathan returns, out of breath. âOkay. Alright, El?â He looks down at the girl. Tries to steady his breathing. âThis is gonna hurt like hell, okay?â
El whimpers out that she understands, and you take hold of her hand. âSweetheart, you need to brace yourself. I promise it will be over soon.â
âIâll be fast, but I need you to stay real still. Here,â Jonathan hands a wooden spoon to Mike. âYouâre gonna want to bite down on this, okay?â
Teeth bared, El clenches her teeth around the spoon. Her body braces for whatâs about to come. Kneeling next to her, you angle your body over hers and pin her arms down with your hands. You look at Mike, ordering him to do the same. âHold her shoulders. Donât let her go, no matter what.â
He pales, but swallows deeply and nods. When Mike is in position, you signal to Jonathan to start cutting. âDo it.â
âOkay,â Jonathan inhales. The knife youâve given him shakes as he holds it over Elâs wound. Heâs fucking terrified, but he knows itâs the only way. Exhaling, he cuts into her flesh. Blood pours from the wound and Elâs screams tear from her chest.Â
Everyone makes a sound of disgust and horror. Your own stomach lurches at the sight of Jonathan cutting into the leg. The image, the way Elâs body convulses, the screams she releases, itâs all too much. You donât feel yourself shaking until Steve guides your head into the nook of his shoulder, shielding you.Â
âThank you,â your breathing is shaky. You arenât even sure if heâs heard you, but Steve nods and his hand rubs up and down your back. Heâs doing whatever he can to help, being the solid surface you need to lean upon. Lending you the strength you need to hold El down and save her.Â
You hear your knife glance against the ground, followed by Elâs scream becoming deafening. Unable to stop yourself, you pull away from Steve to look at whatâs happening. When you do, you almost gag. Jonathanâs fingers are now in Elâs leg, digging underneath the flesh and muscle to find whatever the hell is in there. A horrible squelching sound fills the air. Faintly you think you can hear Will crying behind you.Â
Jonathan struggles, digs deeper into the leg, but it only seems to be making everything worse. El twists and contorts beneath you, in agonizing pain. Her screams only intensify. A tear from your eye lands on her shirt, and you force yourself to hold her down despite how desperately you want to end it.
âGoddamn it!â Jonathan canât find it. He canât find whatever the hell is in Elâs leg. It keeps moving the moment he thinks he has it. Everything is slick from blood.Â
âNo!â El spits out the wooden spoon, her voice raw from screaming. âStop it!âÂ
You canât stomach her pain any longer. The moment she pleads for it to stop, you move off of El and push Jonathan away from her. Nancy helps, touches his shoulder to alert him as well. The moment she has the room to, El sits herself up. âI can do it.
âDo what, El?â You ask, though you think you know anyways.
She breathes heavily. Tears flow freely down her face. Sheâs sitting down, one of her knees is pressed against her chest. The injured leg remains flat on the ground, her hand outstretched above it. Static, the one you always feel when El uses her powers, surrounds you. Thereâs a low hum, she grunts and screams, and yet her hand remains steady. You rub her back, offering her all the strength you can give her, in awe despite the poor timing of it.Â
To have the strength to expel a foreign object from your body. You canât imagine it.Â
El releases one final long, harrowing scream. The lights flicker, the windows behind you rattle violently. You only just barely manage to cover Dustin and the kids from the shards of glass before they explode. At the same time, a small, writhing creature shoots from Elâs leg. It stalls in the air, hovering in front of her face as she continues to scream. The creature is no bigger than the size Dart had been when Dustin first found him. The idea that it had been buried in Elâs leg makes you feel ill.Â
With the last of her energy, El flings the creature across the room. It lands with a sickening thud on the floor, before it starts to move. You watch in horror as it scurries away, releasing its own screech, until Hopperâs boot crashes down upon it, killing it.Â
Youâve never been happier to see that cranky son of a bitch.Â
Joyce stands behind him and you whimper pathetically when you see her. You miss your own mother. Itâs been days since youâve last seen her. Youâre more homesick than youâve ever been before.Â
Alongside Joyce and Hopper is a man youâve never seen before. He has glasses and a beard. As you study him, Jonathan makes a surprised sound. âMurray?â
âYou know him?âÂ
Jonathan nods at you. âHeâs the detective Nance and I visited last year.âÂ
âHeâs insane.â Nancy says, though thereâs a nostalgic smile on her face.Â
Hopper steps forward, investigating the scene. Glass crunches beneath his boots. He stops in front of you and El. He looks down at you. âAlways at the scene of the crime, huh?â
âYeah,â you blow hair out of your face. âCanât seem to ever stop myself.â Then, finally noticing his aggressively bright and floral shirt that heâs wearing, you tilt your head to the side. âNice shirt, by the way. I like the color on you. Youâve been direly needing some color in your life.â
Dustin snorts and El manages a tired smile. Hopper rolls his eyes at you, though you can tell itâs more from fondness rather than annoyance like it usually is. You watch as his eyes drift towards Joyce, uncharacteristically shy. âThanks, kid.â
âAnytime, old man.âÂ
âÂ
âThe Mind Flayer, it built this monster in Hawkins, to stop El, to kill her and pave a way into our world.âÂ
You sit on the fountainâs edge. Dustin is next to you, Steve leans against you on the other side. Mikeâs words surround you.Â
He explains what he and the others have been dealing with while youâve been gone. Innocent people have been getting possessed and turned into chemicalized substances. Their bodies melting together, conjoining to create a monster meant to kill El. With every detail Mike remembers, your stomach twists uncomfortably. It doesnât sound real. It sounds like a thing from nightmares.
And somehow Billy has become the face of it.Â
The last time you saw him, he had been a shell of who he used to be. He had been in pain. Obvious pain. Sweat had run down his flushed skin and his eyes had a frost in them unlike anything you had ever seen before. Instead of helping him, instead of telling anyone about this, you had abandoned Billy.Â
âHow big is this thing?â Hopper asks, shifting so that El can rest more comfortably against him.Â
Jonathan sighs. âItâs⊠Itâs big. Real big. Thirty feet, at least.â
âYouâve seen it?â Your eyes draw to the bruise on his forehead. The pained noise he made when you hugged him still rings in your ears.Â
âWeâve had a rough night.â Nancy whispers, eyes downcast.Â
âIt sorta destroyed Hopperâs cabin.â Lucas looks up at the chief, a poorly feigned apologetic smile on his face. âSorry.â
Steve interjects now. He asks questions, tries to make sure he understands. As he speaks with the group, your head falls onto his shoulder. Your head spins. Only hours ago you were dealing with Russians and national emergencies. Now, you and Steve try to wrap your heads around the idea of a giant human goo creature wreaking havoc on Hawkins. Â
Which, according to Max, is still very much alive.Â
But that doesnât stop Will from trying to help. âBut if we close the gate againââÂ
âWe cut the brain off from the body.â
âAnd kill it.â Lucas finishes for Max. âTheoretically.â
It sounds so simple, but youâve been here before.
Youâve heard this conversation already; you were standing in the Byersâ dining room. Steve had been next to you, just like he is now, and Jonathan had been on your other side. The people surrounding you were the same, only now Robin and Will join. That November, the conversation had terrified you. Closing the gate. Killing the Mind Flayer and destroying its army.Â
It had been the exact same conversation. And it terrifies you still, now. Only this time the fear is accompanied by an emptiness.
Youâve been here before. It hadnât been enough.Â
âHow many more times are we going to kill it?â Your head remains pressed against Steve. Your eyes donât lift from the ground. Exhaustion sags your body. âWe thought we already killed the Mind Flayer. We went through hell and back to close the gate, only for it to be opened again not even a year later. By another country. I mean,â laughter crawls out of your throat. âWhoâs to say that they wonât just open the gate again? Theyâve already done it onceââ
âLoverboy over here,â The bearded man from earlier, Murray, suddenly appears and slaps the back of Jonathanâs head. The man has a mad smile on his face, the kind that tells you heâs an insane genius. After Jonathan shoves him away, Murray stops in front of you. He looks down, a curious glint in his eyes. âHe told me you were a ray of sunshine. Gotta be honest. Iâm not really getting a real sunshine vibe from you.â
Steve subtly shifts your body so that heâs in front of you. His eyes are narrowed, body tense. âWhatâs that in your hands?â
Murray seems to now remember what he interrupted the group for. He clutches the pieces of paper in his hands, waves them in the air. âAh. These, my perfectly coiffed haired friend, are blueprints.âÂ
âThatâs just a poorly done drawing of squares and lines.â You squint at the papers. Theyâre no better than the map Mike had scribbled to navigate the tunnels last year.
âSeriously,â Murray turns back to Jonathan again. âI thought she was supposed to be the nice one.â
You open your mouth to argue, not at all liking whatever this random man is insinuating, but Hopper steps forward first. âJust start talking.â
He sighs, but agrees. Motioning everyone to follow, Murray guides the group to a nearby table so that he can lay his drawings out for everyone to see. âOkay, this is what Alexei called âthe hubâ.â Murray points to the center of the first drawing. âNow, the hub takes us to the vault room.â
âOkay, whereâs the gate?â Hopper hovers over him, attentive.Â
âRight here.â Murray now points to a random box, far from where you know the gate actually is. You bite your lip, unsure if you should speak up just yet. âI donât know the scale on this, but I think itâs fairly close to the vault room. Maybe fifty feet or so.â
You snort obnoxiously loud, getting everyoneâs attention. âYouâre so wrong that it physically pains me.â
âIâm sorry?â Murray gives you an odd look. When Jonathan and Nancy showed up on his doorstep last year, the two of them had nothing but great things to say about you. Jonathan had waxed poetry about you while Nancy had sat at the dinner table, resentful. Now, meeting you, Murray is really struggling to understand where that all came from.Â
âItâs more like five hundred feet.â Erica says. When she sees Murrayâs exasperated expression, she canât help but laugh at the old man. âWhat, youâre just gonna waltz in there like itâs commie Disneyland or something?âÂ
âAnd who are you?âÂ
âErica Sinclair. And who are you?â
âMurray⊠Bauman.â
âListen, Mr. Bunman.â You have to stifle a laugh into Steveâs shoulder. You love Erica, you really do. âIâm not trying to tell you how to do things, but Iâve been down in that shithole for twenty-four hours. And with all due respect, you do what this man tells you, youâre all gonna die.â
âIâm sorry, why is this four year old speaking to me?â
You slide off the fountainâs edge and stand. Whoever this guy is, you donât like his snippy attitude. âSheâs ten, actually, and sheâs right.â
âYeah, you bald bastard!â Lucas reprimands her, but she doubles down. âJust the facts!â
While you enjoy her quips, you gently grab Ericaâs shoulders and place her behind you. There isnât time for her to make a grown man cry. âWe went through hell down there. It wonât be as easy as walking fifty feet. The place is huge.â
âTheyâre right.â Dustin speaks up. âYouâre all gonna die, but you donât have to. Excuse me, may I?â Even before Murray has consented, your brother is already grabbing the blueprints. He sits down and starts explaining. âSee this room here? This is a storage facility. Thereâs a hatch in here that feeds into their underground ventilation system.â
âItâs how we accidentally got in.â You add, figuring any extra information could help.
âWait, you accidentally broke into a secret Russian lair?â Mike tries to hide it, but you can see that heâs impressed. You know that once this is all over, heâll grill you for details later.
âNo, we thought itâd be fun to get tortured by commies on the fourth of July.â Steve points to his swollen eye. âYes, Wheeler. It was an accident.â
âGuys!â Dustin shouts. When he has everyoneâs attention again, he sighs. âJesus. Anyways, these vents will lead you to the base of the weapon. Itâs a bit of a maze down there, but between me, Y/N, and Erica, we can show you the way.âÂ
Hopper stares down at the three of you, unamused. âYou can show us the way?â
Dustin is about to agree, but you cover his mouth with your hand. âYes, I can show you the way. The kids can stay here, but I remember everything from when we were down there. If you want all the hero glory, then fine. Fight some Russians. But I can be your navigator.â
âNo.â Hopper, Steve, Dustin, and Jonathan say at the same time.Â
You roll your eyes at all of them. âOkay, I was only talking to Hopper. The rest of you,â you glare at your brother and the two teens next to him. âArenât a part of this conversation.â
âThere isnât a conversation to be had, kid.â Hopper scoffs at you. He doesnât want to hear whatever youâre about to say. He wonât let you back down there again. From the state Steve is in, Hopper doesnât even want Joyce coming with him. âYouâre not going. End of discussion.â
âYou donât seriously expect me to let you walk into a death trap, right? I mean, I know we argue a lot, but you canât be that dumb.â Hopper has started to walk away now, trying to put an end to the conversation, but you follow him anyways. âListen to me!â He ignores you, doesnât turn around. Instead, Hopper starts gathering bullets as he picks up a shotgun from one of the guards on the ground. Groaning, you continue to chase him.Â
You donât care how annoying youâre being. Youâll nag him until your last dying breath. If he doesnât want you getting hurt, then he has to understand that you donât want him getting hurt either. âHopper, Iâm serious. ElâŠâ You look at the girl, who is far behind the two of you now as she rests near the fountain. Your voice grows thick. A wave of emotions rush over you, seeing her. Sheâs so small. Sheâs still just a kid, despite the power that lies within her. âShe needs you. Youâyou canât get hurt.â
âAnd I wonât.âÂ
âYou donât know that,â you grab the manâs shirt, but he tries to walk anyways. You plant your feet on the ground and grit your teeth. Heâs frustratingly strong. âPlease, justâyouâre her father. Youâyou canât leave herââ You stumble over your words, try to think of how to convince him. There has to be a way, a middle ground. Isnât he the one who taught El what compromise means?Â
In your nagging midst, you overhear Dustin and the party all catch up. Talk about how they missed one another. Itâs a sweet reunion, seeing them come together again after being separated for so long; your boys are together again. It feels like a lifetime ago where they were all together on Weathertop hill. Seeing them together again, it hits you.Â
The walkies. Cerebro.
âWhat if I could still communicate with you from above?â You shout, frantic. Hopper stops walking. He still doesnât look at you, but he indicates that you have his attention. Taking a deep breath, you donât waste any time. âWe have walkies. Dustin, all the kids. Itâs how they communicate with one another. Always have. What if⊠what if I give you directions using them? That way, youâll fulfill your annoying need to be a hero while I fulfill my annoying need to protect everyone.â
Your words come rushing out, messy and jumbled, but Hopper seems to understand. Heâs quiet, mulls what youâve said over and over again in his head. He inhales, closes his eyes, and then exhales agonizingly slow. When he opens his eyes to look at you, heâs resolved. âYouâre really annoying, you know that?â
A relieved smile graces your face. Knowing youâve gotten through to Hopper, you finally release his shirt. You straighten it back out, wipe some dirt off of it. It really is a good shirt, one you know was almost definitely purchased for a woman named Joyce Byers. âIt adds to my charm.â
Hopper chuckles, shakes his head, before walking over to where your brother stands with the others. He fishes a walkie from his back pocket, tosses a spare one to Dustin. âHey, heads up. Your sister came up with a shockingly genius compromise. You guys can navigate, just from someplace safe.â
Dustin sighs. âItâs not that simple.â
âThe signal wonât reach.â Erica clarifies for him.Â
You motion at them to explain faster. âButâŠâ
âBut,â Dustin quickly explains your idea. âWeâd need something with a high enough frequency band to relay with the Russiansâ radio tower. But for that to work, you need someone who has both seen their comms room and has access to a super-powered handcrafted radioââ
âDustin,â you hit his shoulder, urging him to get to the point already. âJust tell him about Cerebro.â
âI was getting there! Look, we have one already situated at the highest point in Hawkins.â Your brother shakes his head. âIf you need us to navigate, we got you. But we need a head start⊠and a car.â
âHey, chief.â You stand beside Hopper now, grinning ear to ear. âDonât you have a car?â
He stares past you, and the rage in his eyes amuses you immensely. Itâs taking everything within him not to start yelling, which only causes your shit eating grin to grow. You extend your arm, hold your hand out palm-facing upwards. This is the best day of your life. âCome on, give me the car keys, Hopper.âÂ
Sucking his teeth, Hopper drops the car keys into your hand. âI hate you.â
Hopper stands in front of you, annoyance and irritability in his eyes as he stares at you, but you donât care. A surge of warmth cascades through you instead. He listened. It means more to you than the man could ever know. Your arms find their way around him, surprising both you and Hopper, as you pull him into a hug. âThank you for listening to me.â
âYeah, well. Donât make me regret it.â Hopper says, his voice rough. He clears his throat, allows his hand to pat your shoulder. He may not know what youâve gone through, but he thinks he can understand the weight the history has left you. Itâs the same weight that he carries every day. The guilt, the anger that follows it. He clears his throat again and pulls you off of him, keeping you at armâs length. âDo me a favor, will you? Make sure El and the others are safe.â
You sniff, wipe away tears. Youâre not sure why youâre crying. âI will, I promise. Good luck, old man.â
âGood luck, kid.â He hesitates, still holding your shoulders. His breath hitches and his eyes donât leave yours. Thereâs something in them, almost a certain kindness that once reflected in your fatherâs eyes when you were younger. The gaze burns you at first, but you stare back at Hopper through it. After he seems to find what heâs looking for, Hopper swallows. He says what Joyce has always said about you; from his conversation with the woman back at Melvaldâs. âYouâre the best of them.â
More tears well in your eyes, but you wipe them away before he can tease you. Hopper releases you, shoves you in a playful manner, and you canât help but laugh. Itâs a warm moment. His words simmer on your skin. Youâve heard them before, you know what people say about you, but the words are different coming from Hopper.Â
Praise doesnât come naturally to him. Words have always plagued him; the ones he has just told you hold a weight thatâs even heavier than the guilt the two of you carry within yourselves. Youâve known Jim Hopper for three years now, but as you watch him walk over to El, soft smile still on his face from his conversation with you, you finally understand him.Â
â
Steve is waiting for you at the fountain, whispering quietly with Robin. The two of them stand off to the side, away from the others. Heâs nervous, uncomfortable. He stands with his back away from Jonathan and Nancy, who are a few feet away talking to Murray. His arms are crossed over his chest and his fingers tap together in an anxious tick youâve become familiar with.Â
The moment he sees you approaching, all the tension in Steveâs body melts away.Â
He grabs your hand the second youâre within reach. Pulling you into his chest, he kisses the top of your head. âAny updates, angel?â
You hum against him, allowing yourself a moment to bask in his warmth. Itâs been a long day. Itâll be an even longer night. âYou know Weathertop hill?â
âYeah, why?â
âGood.â You place Hopperâs keys into Steveâs hand. âYouâre driving us, then.â
Robin points at Jonathan, who sneaks glances at the three of you. âDefine âusâ. Because, no offense, he seems nice and all, but he keeps looking over at you like a lost puppy and itâs making me uncomfortable.â
âBe nice, heâs still my best friend.â Flicking her forehead, you silently scold Robin. âAnd itâs just going to be the three of us with Dustin and Erica. Jonathan and Nancy are taking the rest of the kids to Murrayâs bunker. Heâs just⊠Heâs worried. Probably wants to make sure he says goodbye to me before we leave.â
Robin makes a confused face, reminding you that sheâs new to all of this. That she hasnât had to say goodbye to her loved ones every year with the fear of them not returning. You sigh. âItâs⊠Kinda a tradition, at this point. A final goodbye before all hell breaks loose.â
âHow many times do you guys almost die on a weekly basis?â
Steve snorts. âDepends on the month. November seems to be our worst one, though.â
âAstoundingâŠâ
You leave Steve to deal with Robinâs amazement on his own, though you laugh as you walk away. Ever since the events of Willâs disappearance, youâve done everything you can to not think about what youâve all been through. However, seeing the bewildered amazement on Robinâs face the more you reveal to her, you canât help but laugh.Â
Jonathan sees you approaching him and Nancy and steps aside to make room for you. Theyâre still talking to Murray, although the man is more lecturing them than anything. He holds up a bunch of keys, explaining in great detail which one goes into specific locks. Itâs dizzying trying to keep track of it all.Â
Secretly, youâre grateful that youâre going with Steve and the others. Easier key instructions.Â
âThis one is for the second to last bottom lockââ
âMurray, can I cut in real quick?â You try to be polite about it, but truly you donât care whether or not you have the manâs permission.Â
He glares at you. âArenât you already?â
âGood point!â You grab Nancyâs and Jonathanâs arms and pull them away with a wicked smile on your face. When youâve dragged them far enough away from Murray, you wrap your arms around them both. Jonathan sinks into the unexpected embrace. Nancy stiffens. You try to ignore it. âGet to that old manâs bunker safely, please?â
âOf course, bug.â Jonathan has wrapped an arm around you. He closes his eyes, his fingers span across your back. âStay at Weathertop, get to safety. Maybe even get some rest while you can.â
âIâll try, bee.â Your laugh is wet. This will never get any easier.Â
Nancy shifts in your embrace, and for a moment youâre afraid sheâll pull away entirely, but instead she surprises you by wrapping an arm around you as well. Her chin is tucked against your neck, she still hasnât melted into the embrace like Jonathan has, but sheâs trying. Lips close to your ear, she whispers, âIâll keep him safe.â
You suck in a breath. You hadnât known how desperately you needed to hear Nancyâs reassurance, to hear her silent apology. Pulling away from them, you look at Jonathan and Nancy. âI love you. I love you both.â
Jonathan smiles, the same way he did the night you met him on the Wheelerâs porch. Nancy ducks her head down shyly, the same way she did the night she opened the door to let you into her home.Â
You squeeze their hands one last time before leaving to say goodbye to the others.Â
Lucas wishes you luck, Will hugs you as tight as ever, and El offers you a partial smile. Sheâs still recovering from whatever the monster did to her leg, so you brush some hair out of her face and kiss her head.
âSucks you were down in hell this whole time. Could really go for a brownie right now.â Mike says, a light in his eyes as Elâs head rests in his lap.
You stick your tongue out at him. âSorry, couldnât find a way to bake while getting chased by Russians with guns.â
âLame.â
âGoodbye, Wheeler.â
Then you turn to Max, who has been silent this entire time. She hugs you tightly when she sees you. âHeâll be okay, right?â
Your body goes stiff. Somehow, in the midst of Hopper and the others, you had forgotten about Billy. How heâs infected. Flayed. It hasnât escaped your notice that no one seems to want to bring the matter up, either. When it had been Will, everyone had wanted to make sure he wouldnât die if the gate closed.Â
But no one has asked the same question for Billy.Â
Swallowing, you slowly reciprocate Maxâs embrace. âWeâll⊠Weâll find a way. We always do.â
Though the words arenât meant to be a lie, you canât help but feel that youâre breaking an oath when you say them.Â
âÂ
Steve hadnât noticed what brand of car the keys belonged to at first. However, the moment his brain recognizes the iconic Cadillac logo on its keychain, he practically starts to drool. A fucking Cadillac.
It doesnât take him long to round everyone up and drag you outside.
âI was saying goodbye to Joyce,â you grumble, struggling to keep up with Steveâs quick footsteps.
âItâs a Cadillac, Y/N!â Steve can almost feel the foam pooling around his mouth. His footsteps increase even more, his body vibrating at the knowledge that he gets to drive his dream car. His dad hadnât wanted to buy him one, said that the BMW was more practical. Reliable. When Steve pushes the mallâs front door open and sees the beautiful, timeless car parked perfectly in front of him, he almost collapses. âOh, man, now thisâŠThis is what Iâm talkinâ about!â
ââToddfatherâ?â Robin points out the license plate and its horrible name.
You make a face, but Steve doesnât let her ruin his moment. Heâs ecstatic. This is arguably the best thing that has happened to him all day (besides maybe kissing you). For fuckâs sake, itâs a goddamn Cadillac. âOh, screw Todd! Steveâs her daddy now.â
Steve hops into the carâs front seat like a little kid with a toy car. Meanwhile you, Robin, Dustin, and Erica retract your heads in disgust at what heâs just said. Robin looks at you, repulsed. âDid he just talk about himself in the third person?â
Erica follows up with her own creeped out question. âDid he just call himself daddy?âÂ
âIâm choosing to ignore him right now.â You say to both of the girls, pressing a hand to your forehead as you walk to the car. Thereâs so much you donât want to unpack with what Steve has said.Â
âYou canât ignore me, Y/N.â Steve leans over the center counsel and opens the passenger door for you. âWe already established that Iâm really annoying.âÂ
âJust take us to Weathertop, please.â You buckle yourself in and make sure the kids have their seatbelts on as well. When you see that Robin has found herself in the middle seat, you snicker at her. Sheâs squished between Dustin and Erica, her knees are pressed uncomfortably to her chest.
âWhy did I get stuck in the middle?â She complains.
Steve fixes one of the mirrors before revving the engine. As he pulls out of the mallâs parking lot, he offhandedly responds, âPassenger seat is reserved for girls Iâm dating.â
Everyone in the backseat gags, and you blush furiously. You and Steve havenât had the time to talk about your relationship. Or if there even is a relationship. But heâs just referred to you as the girl heâs dating. He kissed you yesterday, or was it today?
Time has blurred together, but Steveâs hand rests on your thigh as he drives and youâre his girl.Â
There will be time to talk about all of it later. Youâll make sure of it this time.Â
Steveâs foot presses on the gas, speeding through Hawkins. Neither of you were given an exact time frame from Hopper, but he presses down harder on the pedal and sends the car flying. Thereâs music on the radio, doing its best to distract everyone, but your hands are still antsy. Youâre nervous, thereâs still so much left unspecified within the plan. Steve notices your fidgeting fingers and removes his hand from your thigh to play with them; heâs trying to soothe you.Â
You intertwine your fingers through his and smile at him. Steve winks back at you, and you admire how lovely he looks as he drives. The moment is broken when Robin shoves her head between the two of you. âWhat the hell is a Cerebro?â
âItâs basically a radio tower that Dustin built for his girlfriend, Suzie.â You explain to her, voice raised to be heard over the music and wind. âShe lives in Utah.â
Robin raises an eyebrow, intrigued. She leans back in her seat and pokes Dustinâs shoulder. âSuzie must be really special, huh? I mean, if you built this thing and lugged it all the way to the middle of nowhere just to talk to her.âÂ
Your brother preens at this, pleased someone has recognized his romantic efforts. âI mean, nobodyâs scientifically perfect, but Suzieâs about as close to being perfect as any human could possibly be.â
âShe sounds made up to me.â Erica snarks from the backseat. She looks over at Steve, tries to get his opinion. âShe sound made up to you?â
Steve hesitates for just a fraction of a second too long, and you sigh. Dustin notices it, too. âWhy are you hesitating, Steve?â
âIâIâm not!â He looks to you for help, but you only shake your head at him. All he had to do was respond promptly. This is his own fault. âIâm not hesitating! IâI think she sounds real. You know, totally, absolutely real.â
âNot really loving your uncertain tone, Steve.â You say, and Dustin nods in agreement. âSuzie is real. I mean, Iâm almost positive that she is.â
Dustin does a double take at your use of the word âalmostâ. Heâs about to say something, demand to know why youâre not certain Suzie is real, before he notices that Steve is about to miss the Weathertop turn. âLeft, turn left!â
âThereâs not a road here?â Steve argues, squinting his eyes in the dark to see whatever the hell the kid is seeing.
Dustin screams at him again to turn, and you only have a second to brace yourself before Steve jerks the wheel. The carâs tires screech on the asphalt as your body gets thrown forward. You scream, getting war flashbacks to when youâd been in the back of Billyâs car as Max had very recklessly driven you and Steve to the tunnels. Somehow, this is so much worse.Â
The car breaks through a fence and your screaming only intensifies. âWhat the fuck?â
âHendersons, where are we going?â Steve screams to you and your brother. Heâs desperately trying to keep hold of the steering wheel as the car struggles against the hillsideâs grass.Â
âUp!â You and Dustin exclaim. One hand clutches the door, the other clutches the seat. The entire car is practically at a ninety degree angle as Steve continues to drive up the hill. Itâs bumpy, your head hits the back of the seat more times than you would like, and your heart races.Â
The car makes a concerning amount of strange noises the further up the hill you drive. Robin clutches her stomach. âWeâre not going to make it!âÂ
âYes we are!â Steve does everything he can. His foot never leaves the gas. âCâmon, baby. Câmon!âÂ
âSweet talking the car wonât help!â You shriek after a particularly rough bump leaves you nauseous. The poor car strains against the giant hill. The tires, not at all made for off-roading, get caught in the grass.Â
Steve hits the wheel and curses. âCâmon! Please!â He presses harder on the gas, but the car comes to a stop. The tires move uselessly against the slick mud underneath.
Ill and desperately wanting to get out of the car, you unbuckle your seatbelt. âWe can walk the rest of the way, Steve.â He gives you a despaired look, pleading with you to let him continue playing with his new car, but you roll your eyes at him. Youâre five seconds away from vomiting, he can deal with abandoning the car. âThe Toddfather is dead. We can mourn her later.â
Steve groans but turns the car off as everyone gets out, preparing for the walk ahead. The hill is just as steep as it had been earlier this week when you were with the party. While youâre annoyed you have to walk it again, at least this time itâs night and the heat isnât as suffocating.Â
When you reach the crest of the hill, Dustin immediately runs to Cerebro. He crouches next to the radio and turns it on. âBald Eagle, do you copy? Bald Eagle, I repeat, this is Scoops Troop, do you copy?â
Bald Eagle had been your idea.Â
âScoops Troop?â You ask your brother.
He nods, proud. âThought of it myself.â
âNot bad, buddy.â
Murrayâs voice crackles over the walkie. âYes, I copy.â
Everyone lets out a breath of relief when you hear him. So far, the first phase of the plan seems to be working. Cerebro can reach all the way down to the lair; you can communicate with Hopper and Joyce. So far, so good.
Dustin starts to give Murray the directions heâll need for the vents. You and Steve roam the perimeter of the hill, weary and needing something to do. While youâre far from the Russians below you, you still donât necessarily feel like youâre out of harmâs reach. Robin stays with the kids, figuring itâs best to give the two of you some time alone.Â
You stare out into the view of Hawkins from so high above. Weathertop has always been your favorite spot in the small town. Your first summer in Hawkins, Jonathan had introduced you to the hill; you used to spend all your time up here with him. Youâd spend hours running up and down the length of it, giggling and sunkissed. If you stand still enough, you can still hear the laughter in the breeze. You miss Jonathan and being kids with him.Â
âI havenât been up here in years.â Steve stands next to you, voice soft. He stares out into the field as well, admires its beauty the way you are, though really he just wants the excuse to look at you. âForgot how peaceful it was.â
âI love it here,â you tell him. âLate in the summer, dandelions appear. They scatter the entire hilltop. I like running through them.â
âWell, when they start to bloom,â Steve wraps his arms around your waist, pulls you back into his chest. He presses a soft kiss to your cheek, lingers. He hasnât held you in so long, his body aches with the weight of yours against it. âWe can run through them together.â
You smile into the embrace, lean into the kiss, tremble into the words. He will always make you weak. Itâs an exhilarating feeling, knowing someone can dismantle every bone in your body with less than six words. âI think Iâd like thatââ
From the corner of your eye, you see lights flickering in the distance. They catch your attention, standing out against the black backdrop of the night sky. You shrug Steve off, feeling a tug in your chest to walk closer to the hillâs edge. You need to figure out what youâre seeing. With every step you take, the more your vision focuses in on the lights, the more dread fills your body.
Itâs the mall. The lights are coming from the mall.Â
You freeze.Â
The lights are going haywire, flickering wildly. Itâs supposed to be deserted. Jonathan and the others were supposed to have left already, but still your stomach sinks. Something isnât right.Â
Steve stumbles after you, confused as to why you pulled away, but when he sees the mall as well, he stills. âWhat theâŠ?â
âThey left. They said they would be gone by now.â You try to calm yourself down, try to focus on the reasoning. The mall is empty. Itâs supposed to be empty. Jonathan promised you he would make it to Murrayâs safely. He wouldnât lie, he would never lie to you.Â
Robin, Dustin, and Erica come up behind you and Steve. You all stand there at the crest. No one moves, transfixed by what they see. The lights continue to flicker, miles below, impossibly too far away from help.
Someone has to help.
Your feet move, twisting your body to run back to the radio. You need answers. You need to know what the hell is going on, if everyone is safe, and Dustin is right behind you. He falls to the grass in front of the radio and frantically brings it to his lips. âGriswold Family, this is Scoops Troop. Do you copy? Over!â
He repeats the call over and over, but no one responds. With each passing moment of silence, your panic turns into blind fear. âI repeat, do you copyââ A sudden, horrifyingly familiar screech, one that has haunted your nightmares for years now, rips through the radioâs speaker. Itâs loud and gruesome and sends ice into your body. Your brotherâs concern rivals your own. âGriswold Family, please confirm your safety. Are you enroute to Bald Eagleâs nest?â
Dustin is screaming into the radio at this point, demanding answers, but thereâs only snarling on the other side. Your breathing quickens, the edges of your vision blur. Sweat trickles down your neck. You canât breathe. Jonathan is still at the mall. Mike and Will. Nancy, Max and Lucas.Â
El.
The Mind Flayer has them.Â
Steve tries to grab your hand, but youâre blind to it all. In raw desperation, you tear the radio out of Dustinâs hands and bring it to your own lips. âJonathan! Nancy! Mike, anyone.â
Your pleads fill the void of a response in the night air. Steve sits next to you, all he can do is watch as your pleading turns into begging. Your voice cracks, the words scratch your throat. Seeing your white-knuckled grip on the radio, Steve canât take it anymore.Â
âCâmon,â he takes your hand and pulls you up. Numb with fear, your body is limp. You try to fight him, you donât know why heâs pulling you away from the radio when your friends need help, but Steve has made up his mind. He takes the device out of your hands and makes you look at him. âThey need our help.â
âThatâs what Iâm trying to do!â
âY/N, look at me.â Steve motions to the car, and finally you understand. âWeâre going.â
Relief threatens to make your knees weak. Too wired from the debilitating combination of fear and helplessness, all you can do is nod at Steve and allow him to guide you down the hill. Dustin and Erica see that youâre leaving and try to stop you. âWhere are you going?â
âTo get them the hell outta there!â Steve calls over his shoulder, fumbling through his pocket to retrieve the keys. âStay here, contact the others!â
Dustin calls out your name, anxious. He doesnât want you to leave, and you hate that you have to leave him. But right now, he and Erica are as far from danger as physically possible. Weathertop hill is miles away from Starcourt. Right now, Jonathan needs you, and so do the others. Breaking out of Steveâs grasp, you run back to your brother and kiss his forehead. âIâll be back, I promise.â
You run back to the car where Steve awaits, and Robin is quick to follow. She runs after the two of you and catches the walkie that Dustin tosses her. âStay in touch,â he orders the three of you, still entirely against the whole thing.Â
âWe will!â You shout back at him, already crawling into the car. âStay safe, donât do anything stupid, and stay here.â
The backdoor closes, Robinâs seatbelt clicks into place, then the Cadillacâs engine roars to life.
â
Your hands won't stop shaking as Steve drives. Nothing he says can reassure you. The car hasnât gone below seventy miles an hour despite the narrow road, and still it doesnât feel like it will be enough.Â
âIâm sure theyâre okay.â Steve tries again to sound convincing, like his hands also donât shake as he grips the steering wheel. âI mean, they have El. Sheâs a superhero.â
âTotal superhero.â Robin unhelpfully chimes in. Her own nervousness is on display as she twists her fingers together.Â
You draw your knees into your chest, trying desperately to make yourself smaller. Youâre terrified for your friends, you shouldâve never split up. The party always does better when itâs together. Forcing air into your lungs, you stare out the windshield. âHow much farther?â
âA minute, maybe even less.â Steve promises, pressing down even harder on the gas pedal. The engineâs roar deafens your ears, and you welcome the distraction.Â
In the distance you see Starcourtâs blinding neon lights. They grow bigger and bigger with every passing second, and you release the breath you had been holding when you see that youâre close. The moment of relief is short lived, however, when you hear gunshots pierce through the night. The sound rings in your eyes and the sight of Nancy firing the gun chokes you.Â
âThere!â You point towards where she stands and Steve changes the direction of the car. The tires screech and your body thuds against the door but you donât care. All you can focus on is Nancy standing in front of Jonathanâs car, unmoving as she fires bullet after bullet. Something seems to be wrong with his car, you can hear the engine fail each time he turns the key.
You squint your eyes. At first, you canât see what Nancy is firing at, but within seconds you see the third car barreling straight towards her at a terrifying speed. In the driverâs seat is Billy. âSteve!â
âI see him!â He floors it.Â
The impact knocks all the air out of your body. It all happens so fast. Glass shatters. Metal hits metal. Your body gets thrown, your head roughly hits Steveâs shoulder as the car spins out. Your eyes squeeze shut at the momentum. You canât remember if you scream.Â
âAre you guys okay?â Steve asks, panting, as soon as he car comes to a stop. His head is spinning yet the first thing he does is look to see if youâre hurt. Thereâs some glass in your hair, but for the most part there isnât a scratch on you, which heâs thankful for.Â
âAsk me tomorrow?â Robin stares blankly ahead, still trying to process whatâs just happened.Â
It takes a few moments for you to come to. Your ears are ringing. Your neck aches from being thrown so suddenly to the left. âLetâs never do that again.â
âAgreedâŠâ Robin swallows, but quickly her mouth goes dry. âOh, shit.â
You follow her line of sight and nearly throw up. The Mind Flayer crawls over the mall and releases a thundering screech, and the size of it alone makes you want to cry. Itâs huge, bigger than anything youâve ever seen before.Â
A car honks behind you, breaking you from your terror. Your head whips around, finding Nancy in the passenger seat of Jonathanâs car. âGet in!â
Quickly the three of you scramble out of the wrecked car. There isnât room in any of the passenger seats, so you yank the trunk door open and scream at Robin and Steve to crawl in. Itâs a tight fit, you have to press your back against Steveâs chest, but itâll have to do.Â
As soon as the trunk is closed, Jonathan steps on the gas. Youâre thrown further into Steveâs chest and Robin, who sits in front of you, lets out a quiet yelp when she sees the Mind Flayer chasing after the car, not far behind. Seeing this as well, Jonathan takes a rough turn and everyone in the car tries to brace for the rest of the ride.Â
âAre you okay, bug?â Jonathan shouts over his shoulder, eyes still on the road.
âFine and dandy,â you pick a piece of glass out of your hair. Steve helps, carefully combing through your hair as well. The Mind Flayer screams, tries to lunge at the car, and your heart skips a beat. You try to distract yourself. âI crash cars every day. How about you guys, what brought yâall out here tonight?â
âBilly.â Everyone in the car says in unison.
You wince. âItâs always him, isnât it?â
No one answers. Your quips donât land. Robin hasnât looked away from the Mind Flayer yet, Steve doesnât want to look at it. Jonathan stares at the road ahead of him and Nancy flinches every time the Mind Flayerâs body thuds against the earth. The rest of the kids are silent, the echoes of its footfalls pounding against their eardrums.Â
Itâs grim in the car. Really fucking grim.Â
âDusty-bun, you copy?â A girlâs voice comes through over the radio. Itâs not a voice you recognize; never in your life have you heard anyone besides your own mother refer to your brother as Dusty-bun.
Steveâs bewildered expression matches your own. Then Dustinâs voice crackles through the radio, and your bewilderment turns into relief. At least your brother is far away from whatever the hell is chasing you right now. âI copy, Suzie-poo. It sounds much better now, thanks.âÂ
âSuzie,â Steve and Robin breathe out at the same time. You smile at them, smug. They had their doubts, but you were almost certain she had been real. Serves them right.Â
The nickname Dustin has for his girlfriend, however, is awful. ââSuzie-pooâ? Thatâs the best nickname he couldâve come up with?â
âI like bee, better.â Jonathan agrees.
Steve scoffs. âHoney has a nicer ring to it.â
âBoth of you shut up!â You donât have time for their weird âmy horse is bigger than yoursâ competition. Dustinâs started speaking over the radio again and youâre trying to listen in case itâs important. Heâs asking Suzie whether she knows what Planckâs constant is, and you have no idea how any of this is relevant to the situation at hand.Â
âOkay, so I know it starts with two sixes, and then aâŠâ Dustinâs voice trails off. Apparently this Planck thing is a number, one he canât seem to remember. âW-What is it?â
âOkay, let me just be clear on this.â The tone of Suzieâs voice makes you pity your brother. Itâs an angry tone, annoyed and fed up. Whatever sheâs about to say, it wonât be pretty. âI havenât heard from you in a week, and now you want a mathematical equation that you should know so you can⊠save the world?â
You whistle, commending the girlâs sense of self worth. âSheâs got a point.âÂ
Dustin pleads with her, promising that heâll make it up to Suzie as soon as he can. You feel a bit bad for him, honestly. He really had been trying to contact her ever since he got home from camp. How was he supposed to know his week would end up being dominated by Russians?
âYou can make it up to me now.â Suzieâs voice lowers a frightening octave. You have no idea what sheâs about to say, and a large part of you wants to throw the radio out the window before youâre forced to find out.Â
âWhat?â Dustin sounds frightened as well, which doesnât make you feel any better.Â
âI want to hear it.â
Horror fills you. Itâs worse. So much worse than you ever couldâve imagined. You know exactly what Suzie wants from Dustin. âOh, no⊠He told her.â
âTold her what?â Steve asks you, confused by this entire ordeal. Dustin and Suzie argue in the background. Sheâs insistent and your brother tries his best to convince her otherwise.Â
Jonathanâs eyes meet Steveâs in the rearview mirror, mischief in them. âTheater camp.â
âJonathan Byers, I will hurt you!â You hiss at him, utterly mortified. Sometimes you despise the fact that heâs your closest friend. He knows far too much about you.Â
Steve has so many questions, but he forgets all of them when Dustin starts to sing. âTurn around, look at what you see.â
His voice is clear and beautiful, a testament to the countless hours the two of you were forced to endure in vocal lessons. When you were younger and still living in Virginia, your mother made you and your brother attend a musical theater camp every summer. She loved having you guys perform little shows for her around the house. Said your voices were like angels to listen to.Â
The day you and Dustin moved to Hawkins, you both swore to never tell anyone about the camp. The secret would die with you.Â
Jonathan only knows about it because your mom had him video tape Christmas carols a few years ago (like the traitor that he is). It had taken several batches of cookies, numerous pleas, and a handful of threats to ensure he wouldnât tell anyone what he saw.Â
âIn her face, the mirror of your dreams.â Dustinâs melodic voice floats through the car. The song had been one the two of you sang frequently at camp, its verses simple yet fun to sing together.Â
Steve and Robin share a look of disbelief. Theyâve completely forgotten about the Mind Flayer still chasing after the car. Suzie, a surprisingly good singer as well, now joins Dustin. They sing together, in a sweet, childish way. You canât help but sing along, harmonizing with them.Â
Everyone in the car looks at you as if youâre insane, but youâre too tired and exhausted to care. Youâve had the weirdest two days of your goddamn life. Sue you for singing along. Itâs a good song.Â
That, or maybe youâre just delirious from dehydration.
After a minute or so, the song comes to a close, and youâre almost saddened by that. Youâve missed singing with your brother. You make a mental note to bug him about it later. âPlanckâs constant is 6.62607004.â
Dustin laughs into the radio, happy that Suzie finally revealed the number. âYou just saved the world!â
âGosh, I miss you, Dusty-bun.â
The two continue to go back and forth with their baby talk, which you cringe at. Itâs disgusting to overhear, although you guess you understand now why Dustin hates being around you and Steve. Youâll apologize to him later.Â
Dustinâs voice cuts off unexpectedly, which you assume is Ericaâs doing. Youâll also thank her later. The car goes quiet again. No one knows what to follow Dustinâs impromptu performance with.Â
âSo, theater camp, huh?â Steve finally breaks the silence, squeezing you gently in his arms as he teases.Â
âTell anyone and I swear Iâllââ The Mind Flayer suddenly turns around, catching your attention. It runs away, back towards the mall. It doesnât make any sense. Everyone is here, in the car. It only wants El. Unease twists your stomach. You lean forward and look at who is in the car. When you see Will and Lucas in the seat in front of you, you panic. âWhere are the others?â
Youâre practically crawling over the seat to try and get to Jonathan and Nancy. âWhereâs Max and El? Where the hell is Mike?â
Nancy tries to distance herself from your anger. âWe got separated, but theyâreâtheyâre fine. We had to guide the Mind Flayer away from the mallââ
âSo you left them?â
âWe didnât really have much of a choice, Y/N!â Nancy screams back at you now, insulted that you truly believe she would ever leave her brother behind willingly. She wouldnât do that. She knows that you know this.Â
âItâs going back for them! It fucking turned around, canât you see that? We need to follow it, now!âÂ
âY/Nââ
âTurn. Around.â
âSteve, sit Y/N back down!â Jonathanâs yell cuts in between you and Nancy. Youâre about to start spewing curses at him, but Steveâs arms are strong and force you back into his lap. Youâre livid. âHold on!âÂ
Jonathan knows youâre right. He tightens his hold on the steering wheel and stomps on the brakes. The car spins, he twists the wheel, controls it as best as he can, before he steadies the vehicle and accelerates back towards the mall.Â
âÂ
When you get to the mall, Lucas announces that he has a plan.Â
âFireworks have an insane amount of gunpowder in them.â He explains to the group, waving around a handful of fireworks he left in the trunk. Youâre all carrying some as you run through the mallâs parking lot. âIf we tie them together, we can mimic the damage of dynamite.â
âThink itâll be enough to kill the Mind Flayer?â Nancy asks, hesitant.
âIf we throw them from above, yeah!â
You kiss Lucasâ cheek, only barely managing not to trip over your feet as you run. âI think youâre a genius, Sinclair.â
Inside the mall, everyone quickly sets the fireworks up. Faintly you can hear the Mind Flayer lurking somewhere, its roars echoing throughout the building, but it hasnât found you guys yet. Lighters get passed around, fireworks get messily taped together, groups are divided in an attempt to cover the most ground. Jonathan with Nancy. Will with Lucas. You and Steve with Robin.
Youâre taping together the last of your fireworks when you look down over the railing. You almost drop the fireworks in your hand when you see Billy hovering over El. Heâs so much bigger than she is. Sheâs hardly even visible beneath him. Your stomach churns. âHeâs here.â
Thuds shake the ground. The Mind Flayer descends from the rooftop and crawls over to where Billy has placed El. Its mouth opens, preparing for the kill, and Lucas throws the first firework. âFlay this, you ugly piece of shit!â
Bursts of light collide into the monster. It hisses, turns to face the direction the firework was thrown, and Lucas throws another into its mouth.Â
Smoke begins to fill the air. The whistle of the rockets sting your ears. The light blinds you. Itâs loud and messy and fireworks rain down upon the monster. Everyone throws the bundles they have, and yet still you hesitate. Billyâs eyes flash through your mind. How the red in them overtook the icy blue. The sweat that poured from his face. The cruelty that seeped through his skin.Â
Itâs horrible whatâs happened to him. He didnât deserve to become a pawn in this maddening game.Â
But someone has to end it. You breathe in, relax your body, and bring your lighter to the first firework. Its heat licks at your skin as you release it into the air. You hit the side of its body, sending the Mind Flayer stumbling back.Â
âHey, asshole. Over here!â Steve throws a firework and its blasts almost scorches the two of you. Itâs dangerous, stray fireworks threaten to crash into everyone, but the plan seems to be working. WIth every hit the Mind Flayer takes, the more he weakens.Â
Your thumb burns as you light fireworks over and over again. The motion is repetitive, just enough to keep the fear in you at bay. Itâs deafening within the mall. Itâs exhilarating. Itâs dizzying. Reds, blues, yellows, greens all light up the sky.Â
Distantly, through the haze of smoke, you watch as the fireworks affect Billy as well. He cowers each time the Mind Flayer gets hit, but it also seems to enrage him as well. He grabs Elâs wounded leg and drags her closer to the monster.
Helplessly you wish you were down there with El, helping her. However, all you can do is continue throwing fireworks in a crazed attempt to save the ones you love. You scream with every throw, exerting all your strength to throw them as far as you physically can. But youâre quickly running out of ammunition.Â
âDustin, weâre out of time!â Steve screams into the walkie, breath heaving with soot on his face.Â
Your brother screams back, pleading with Hopper to close the gate. No one answers him, and you hold back exhausted sobs as you throw the remaining fireworks. They wonât be enough. Someone has to close the gate, sever any connection the Upside Down has to your world. Itâs the only way any of you are making it out alive.Â
Yet it remains open, and Billy has now crawled back on top of El.Â
She seems to be saying something to him, but in the cloud of smoke and explosions you canât be sure. Robin helps you light the last firework, Steve aims it, and youâre numb to it all. He throws it, it explodes into a shower of purple. Its ashes scatter around Billy, singes his back, and you see now that heâs stopped moving.Â
âThat was the last one!â Robin shouts over the screams of the fireworks. Steve runs a hand through hair and curses. There isnât anything else the three of you can do.
You run to the railing and look around, feverish to find any way to help. Jonathan catches your eye from across the plaza. He looks just as distraught as you are. Your palm hits against the metal of the railing in frustration. There has to be something. Then you see Max and Mike below, standing on the outskirts of where Billy and El are, all alone.Â
âIâm going down!â You scream to Robin and Steve. You have to get down there. Someone has to be with them. Theyâre too close to the fire and explosions and monsters.Â
âY/N, waitââ Steve tries to stop you, but you plead with him.Â
âSteve, I need you to trust me.â Thereâs a raw, overwhelming feeling within you that something bad is about to happen. You canât shake it, the feeling of loss being inevitable frightens you. For three years now youâve saved everyone, done everything right. For three years, youâve gotten lucky. You donât know how to explain all of this to Steve, the fear that has followed you ever since you first intercepted the Russian code. âPlease.â
Maybe itâs the way you say it. Maybe itâs the tears that stream down your face as you look at him. Whatever the reason may be, Steve reluctantly lets go of you. Endlessly thankful for him, your hands cradle his face as you kiss him. He makes a cute, surprised noise, and you wish more than anything that you can bask in the warmth of his lips, but you canât.Â
You force yourself to pull away. âIâll be back, take care of the others.â
And then youâre gone.Â
Footsteps echoing against the walls of the mall, you run down the stairs and straight towards Max and Mike. They hear you approach and suddenly theyâre both in your arms. They hold onto you tightly, none of you can tear your eyes away from the scene in front of you. Billy slowly stands up and away from El. His movements are labored as he walks in front of the Mind Flayer, blocking its path to her.Â
They stand, face to face, unmoving. Predator against prey. Your heart pounds in your throat as you watch, too scared to move. In an almost imperceptible velocity, the Mind Flayer extends its claws.Â
Billy raises his arms, stopping the monster from piercing through El, protecting her. âNo!â A guttural, animalistic scream tears apart his vocal chords. He screams, over and over again, as the Mind Flayer struggles against him.Â
Max freezes in your arms, you feel her choke on her gasp.Â
Everything happens slowly after that.Â
The first claw that penetrates Billyâs side.Â
The second one that cuts through his other side.Â
Then the third one, the fourth and the fifth and the sixth. They pierce through his skin, sink into the flesh. His body goes limp as heâs suspended into the air. The Mind Flayer hisses down at him, its teeth bared, and Billy, who has never been afraid, screams in the face of death as the monster fatally punctures his chest.Â
Everything stops.
âBilly!â You will never forget the pain in Maxâs scream. It will become yet another sound that haunts your nightmares.Â
As you stand there with a paralyzed Max in your arms, the Mind Flayer drops Billyâs body onto the ground. He lands with a sickening thud. The Mind Flayerâs body crashes into the walls, it convulses, spasms, leaving destruction in its wake. Then, all together, it stills and falls to the ground.
The gate has been closed.Â
Mike tears himself from your arms and runs over to El. He pulls her into a hug and she begins to sob. You and Max walk numbly over to them, neither of your eyes leave Billyâs bleeding body. He shudders weakly where he lays, a pool of blood encasing his body.Â
âBilly?â Max knees next to him. Sheâs crying, she doesnât know what to do. Thereâs so much blood. âBilly, get up. Please, Billy. Get up, please.â
You kneel next to her, at her side through it all.Â
Blood pours from Billyâs mouth. He coughs and the wet sound only makes Max cry harder. He looks up at you, his eyes are finally blue again. âTalking to you⊠sweetheart.â
But if you need anyone to talk to, about anything, come find me, okay?
Those had been your last words to him.Â
âBillyâŠâ He had tried to find you. He had been lost and scared and alone. He didnât know what had been happening to him, why his anger became venom. A sob is wrenched from your mouth. He had been all alone, and he had tried to find you.
Billy coughs again, more blood leaks from his wounds. With the last of his strength, he turns his head to Max. âIâm sorryâŠâ His chest heaves in pain, he labors two final breaths, before his chest falls entirely. It doesnât rise again.Â
Max shakes his shoulders, uncaring for the wounds there. She shakes him, begs and pleads with him to wake up, but his body remains lifeless. She lets out one final, anguished sob. âBilly.âÂ
She buries her face in your chest and sobs. You hold her, El joins. The girl tries to soothe Max, she tries to keep you together, but you break as well.Â
You cry for the boy Billy had once been. Max had told you stories from before. How he would drive her to the skate park, scare off any older boy who tried to taunt her. She told you about how he used to love surfing in California, before his mom had left them and his dad became violent.Â
Max told you about how kind Billy had once been, she knows he used to be kind. How she could see it in him still, hiding the bruises from his father to not scare her. To make her feel safe in their own home even if he intimidated her as well; it was the violence in him that was created by a monster far more vile than the Mind Flayer.Â
You cry for Max, too young to lose such a complicated loved one. You know the pain better than anyone else. How it hurts to grieve them, how it makes you feel pathetic to miss someone who has only hurt you, but the tenderness of knowing them tethers you to it all. Billy had been her brother. There is no greater tether than that.Â
You cry because you loved and have lost. You will blame yourself for having not said anything about Billyâs off behavior. You had seen the first signs of what the Mind Flayer did to him. He had been stranded on the side of the road, bloodied and bruised, blue eyes darker than normal, and you had done nothing except tell him to come find you.Â
And then you had left him.Â
Billy Hargrove died alone.
You and Max will share the burden of this guilt.Â
âÂ
Jonathan finds you first, then Steve. Youâre on the floor, kneeling with Max in your arms, two broken pieces finding solace in the other. Billyâs body lies next to you, neither you nor Max can bear to look at it.Â
âIâm sorry, Iâm sorry, Iâm sorry,â theyâre the only words you can say to the girl.Â
Max clutches your arms around her and her tears soak your shirt. El and Steve try to coax her out of your arms, but she doesnât move. She refuses to let go of you, though she allows Jonathan to drape his arms over you and hold you as your own sobs echo within the mall.Â
Nancy and the others join. They leave a wide berth around the dead body before them. Nancy sees that youâre in no condition to guide, so she takes over for you. She instructs Steve and Lucas to take Max from your arms so that they can stand the two of you up. The fire from the wreckage is quickly spreading and youâll need to evacuate soon.
âItâs okay, bug. Youâre okay.â Jonathan whispers in your ear, one hand delicate on your arm. Steveâs hands rest upon your other arm, and together the two of them are able to get you onto your feet.Â
Your body shakes, grief sits heavily upon your chest. Steveâs eyes never leave your weak frame.Â
Itâs all a blur after that.Â
Firefighters break through the mall and evacuate the building. Nancy and Jonathan do all the talking. Someone, you think itâs Steve, carefully guides you through the maze of burning rubble and bodies. Itâs raining outside and the soft thunder almost drowns out the drone of the helicopters that swarm the building.Â
There are ambulances amongst the military trucks and youâre shoved into one by a concerned medic. The woman explains to you that youâre in shock, that your body is in a state of perpetual flight. She allows Steve to sit and stay with you only after sheâs finished patching up his split lip and bruised eye.Â
âItâs going to take some time to heal,â the medic explains to you. Sheâs soft spoken, maternal, and in your numb state she reminds you of your mother. âYou kids went through a lot tonight.â
Time.Â
It always goes back to time.Â
Steve rubs your back and kisses the top of your head every few minutes. You rest your head against his shoulder, body pressed against his, a blanket draped around both of your shouldersâ. Neither of you say anything. His hand on your back is warm, it unthaws the ice that the shock has left behind. His touch grounds you, keeps you afloat.Â
A car pulls up in the distance and its doors slam. Your eyes drift up, finding Joyceâs as she stumbles through the crowd of armed soldiers and firefighters. She stumbles around, lost in some haze that clouds her once shining face. Joyce looks around in concern, trying to find her sons, and somehow you know, even before her face crumbles when she sees you, that something terrible has happened.
Her eyes meet yours.Â
Hopper isnât with her.
Will rushes towards his mother and almost knocks her down with how hard he hugs her. Joyce clings onto him and breaks into heartwrenching, bone crushing, sobs. You can hear her from where you sit with Steve, you can feel the weight of her loss like thickened water in your lungs.Â
In the other ambulance next to you, El, who had been resting in Mikeâs lap, stands up when she sees Joyce. She walks towards the woman as she embraces her son. Though El faces away from you, standing alone in the middle of the parking lot, the way her shoulders shake as she begins to fall apart indicates the remnants of her childhood have died tonight.
âHopperâs dead.â Theyâre the first words youâve spoken all night. Your voice is hoarse from disuse and the words echo, taunting you.Â
Steve doesnât say anything, only a heavy sigh leaves his body.Â
There were three deaths tonight. Billy, Hopper, and Elâs childhood. One for every year you got lucky. The fear that had been creeping through the back of your mind finally presents itself to you. It manifests in the humid July air and it laughs at you. Saving Will, closing the gate, destroying the Mind Flayer. They were debts needed to be fulfilled, and they were paid for tonight.
You see Max and Robin sitting on a stretcher across from you. Max also hasnât said anything all night, lost in her own grief and remorse. Joyce still sobs in Willâs arms. El grieves alone, mourning the closest thing sheâs ever had to a father.Â
You see Jonathan and Nancy whispering quietly to one another in another ambulance. They share a blanket like you do with Steve, but Nancyâs eyes are sunken in and Jonathanâs face is pale. Lucas and Mike sit together, too exhausted to say anything.Â
Youâre all bleeding or burned or bruised and youâre tired.Â
âSometimesâŠâ Your voice cracks, tears threaten to silence you, and you force yourself to breathe in. Force yourself to focus, to get the words out. Theyâre important, somehow, even if you donât know why. âSometimes it feels like Iâve used up all my luck.â
Steve draws small circles into your ribcage. His fingers catch on the raised skin, the scar from when you saved his life last year. âLuck?â
âWhen Will went missing⊠It was pure luck that I found him. Brought him back home.â You werenât supposed to have been with the kids when they found El. You were lucky that night, it was luck that threw you into the middle of it all. âIt was luck that saved Will last year, too. Those tunnelsâŠâ Your body shivers at the memory. It had been so cold down there, the smell of the damp earth is a scent you will never forget. âAnd now Iââ
Your words catch in your throat. Steveâs body presses against yours, he waits for you, patient. When your voice returns, you try again. âAnd now I⊠Iâm not sure how I feel.â
âWhyâs that, angel?â Steve listens, he tries to understand. âI mean, the Mind Flayer is gone. We won.â
You saved Hawkins. You saved El. You know this, and it should be enough, but it isnât. âAll the deaths that took place tonight stain everything.â
Elâs father is dead. Joyce had come so close to loving again. Max no longer has someone to call a brother. Billy, who endured so much hurt when he was a child, never got the chance to experience kindness when he grew up.Â
Billy never got the chance to become good, not like you did. You were lucky to have even become kind again in the first place. It had taken years to turn the hurt from your childhood into empathy. You had a mother who called you her sweet girl even when you screamed horrible insults at her. You had a brother who held your hand through the anger that your father left behind. You had a best friend who taught you that not everyone leaves. There had been people who loved you, who were gentle, who showed you that anger can be turned into something soft.Â
But all Billy ever knew in his life was violence and cruelty. It isnât fair.Â
âMy entire life Iâve been lucky,â your chest constricts as you confess everything to Steve. All your fear, the doubt, the insecurity. âNow itâit feels like Iâve used up all my luck.â Your fingers find Steveâs, a mind of their own as your body seeks the solace only he can bring. He doesnât know that heâs the reason you believe youâve had more luck than anyone else in their life. âI⊠I was lucky to have met you, to become your friend, someone you trust. How could I possibly have any luck left over after everything weâve been through together?â
Everything burns in Steve. He understands what youâre trying to say, he does, but he doesnât agree. Steve hooks the pad of his fingertip underneath your chin and coaxes your head up, he wants you to look at him as he speaks. He needs you to hear him. To understand. âWell, thatâs where youâre wrong.â
You wipe your eyes, uncomfortable under Steveâs open and earnest gaze. âIâm wrong?â
He hums, strokes a finger from the dip of your cheek up to the crest of your brow. He admires you, memorizes the skin beneath his. âYouâve taught me a lot of things, but youâre wrong about that luck theory of yours. See, I have my own theory that you can never run out of luck if you love, and you taught me that to love and be loved is the luckiest thing a person can give and receive.â
Steve remembers the first day he ever saw you. Heâd been thirteen, you had been twelve. He remembers how small you looked to him, yet lovely nonetheless, even back then. You had always been so lovely to Steve, kind, delicate, admirable.Â
Your eyes stare into Steveâs and he remembers the first day he spoke to you. The squeal of your bike tires as you almost crashed into his car. The way the setting sun cast you in a golden glow in the ditch you landed in as Steve offered you his hand. How, the moment you laughed at what he said, he felt breathless.Â
You smile at Steve now, the same smile all those years ago, the smile he saw when he was thirteen and believed in knights and dragons. Now, at eighteen, you smile at Steve and he believes in fates that attach people to one another and mold them into one being.Â
âAnd Iâm lucky enough to be able to love you, angel.âÂ
Steveâs words cut through you. Theyâre the good that remind you of the light of the sun that follows the dark of the night. Itâs almost like an awakening, a slow remembering, how can someone run out of luck if they love with everything within them?
You see Mike now consoling El. Sheâs in pain, but Mike bears the hurt with her. You see Jonathan and Nancy sleep soundly against each other, safe in the otherâs arms. Lucas holds Maxâs hand as Robin cracks a joke that gets the young girl to laugh. Will strokes his fingers through his motherâs hair, offering her love that only a son can.Â
Even while there is so much grief and pain within this world, the love that follows overwhelms it.
Steve stares down at you, eyes soft with contentedness. There isnât a pressure behind them, he doesnât need you to say anything to him. Heâs simply happy to have you in his arms, to have you with him now, to remind him of how lucky he is, and youâre so full of love for him.Â
âIâm lucky enough to be able to love you, too, sweet honey.â
Steve Harrington smiles the boyish smile that you fell for long before you knew what love even was, and he kisses you. He breathes you in, he has you right where he wants you.Â
You finally, finally, have come home.Â
âÂ
Time passes slowly afterwards; you take it one day at a time.Â
After the mall burns down, your job is practically all but saved. Itâs a small, bittersweet thing. Mrs. Waters had told you the news with her own bittersweet smile, mourning her dear friend Mrs. Driscoll who died in the fire. She will never know the truth, that the woman had become part of an army created by a monster.Â
âBut at least Doris would be happy that I still have my store,â the woman said as she stacked books with you at the counter. It had only taken you two days before finding yourself falling back into old habits. Your mother had wanted you to stay home for the rest of the summer, but Bookstrordinary has always been a second home to you, and you couldnât bear the silence in the house. Mrs. Waters sighed sadly, looking down. âI miss her.â
âIâm sorry, Mrs. Waters.â You squeezed her hand, mourned with her.
Hopperâs funeral took place a week after Starcourt burned down. The entire town showed up, something that you know the old man wouldâve hated, and he was crowned Hawkinsâ hero. You spent the ceremony in the very back, holding Elâs hand, so that the two of you wouldnât be seen.
Billyâs funeral was a few days after Hopperâs. Max sat alone at the front of the church, Billyâs father had been too drunk to attend and her mother couldnât get the time off of work. After the ceremony, the girl silently followed you into your car and spent the rest of the day at Bookstrordinary with you. She hadnât wanted to go home to an empty house, and you understood the feeling.Â
Max spends most of her summer with you at the store after that. Some days she helps restock the shelves, singing along to your set of tapes, bright and cheery. But some days sheâs quiet, sits in a corner and pretends to read whatever you hand her. El stops by the store sometimes, too. You read comics to her, bake her the oatmeal raisin cookies she loves so much, and gossip about Mike and Lucas if Max is having one of her good days.Â
During the first week you bake Joyceâs favorite muffins, the second week you bake her brownies. You offer her a shoulder to cry on every time you stop by the Byers home, you reminisce over Hopper and his disdain for you; she appreciates everything you do.Â
Steve spends every single day with you, it doesnât matter where you are. Without a job, he follows you everywhere. Whether youâre at work, at home, even at Jonathanâs or Nancyâs, heâs always able to find you with Robin right behind him. Nancy thinks the newfound trio is bizarre, but Jonathan canât help but laugh whenever he sees Robin talking your ear off while Steve follows you around like a moth to a flame.
Together, you all try to heal.
Two weeks pass and youâre woken up by the ringing of your phone.Â
âHello?â Annoyance seeps through your greeting. Youâve only just managed to fall asleep, the nightmares at bay for once.Â
âCome outside, angel.â
His voice wakes you up, the annoyance now replaced with confusion. âSteve?â
âWear something warm, okay?â
âWhatâ?â He hangs up, the line disconnects, and youâre completely taken aback by the phone call. You didnât make any plans with Steve tonight, at least not any that you can recall. He had spent the day with you at work, ate dinner with you and your family, before watching a movie with Dustin and going home.Â
Youâre not entirely sure why heâs called you at nearly two in the morning to come outside, but you listen anyways. On your desk chair lays the cardigan Steve bought you for Christmas, his initials stitched into the sleeve. Sliding it over your shoulders, you quickly put it on before climbing through your window.
Steveâs car is parked two houses from yours, headlights off. Thereâs music faintly playing that can be heard through the window, and a familiar melody has you running to get inside. âThe Beatles?â
They were the band that you and your dad used to listen to. His fingers would strum their songs on his guitar as the two of you sat side by side on the front porch of your childhood home. He would hum the words to you. Told you that you should know about real music.Â
When your dad left, he took the music with him.
Jonathan had tried to get you into his favorite artists. The Smiths, David Bowie, the Clash. He would sit you down in his room and play their songs over his record player and watch your reactions. While the music was good, and youâve come to love them because the artists reminded you of Jonathan, it was never the same as listening to the Beatles with your dad during early July mornings.Â
Then one night, when you and Steve had been driving around Hawkins, a Beatles song began to play over the radio. Unknowing of your history with the band, Steve started to hum along the same way your dad would do, and it was finally then that music was brought back into your life.
âWhat, I donât get a hello?â Steve is smiling ear to ear, seeing the flushed joy on your face and the cardigan you wear.Â
You throw your body over the center console and hug him. âHi, honey.â
As he drives, Steve is unusually quiet. His initial smug greeting upon your arrival is quickly overshadowed by a shy demeanor. Steveâs fingers fidget on the steering wheel, his foot taps against the carâs floor. The Beatles play softly within the car and somewhere along the route you find that the wooded scenery starts to look familiar.
Heâs driving you to Loverâs Lake.
âWhy are we heading towards the lake?â You ask Steve, but he pretends not to hear you. Instead, he turns the radio up and sings along to Paul McCartney. Your eyes wander to the backseat and notice a small box nestled against the leather.Â
A few minutes later Steve parks the car and wordlessly the two of you get out. Itâs dark, the moon reflects off the lakeâs water. Crickets sing in the air and the waves lap at the shore. Itâs a beautiful night, the July heat is masked by the nightâs breeze; your cardigan keeps you warm.Â
Lost in admiring the view, you donât notice that Steve has left your side until he returns with a picnic basket. The box you saw earlier is tucked underneath his arm. You tilt your head at him, quizzically. âWhat are you planning, Harrington?â
Steve grabs your hand. âYouâll see.â
He leads you down to the lakeâs edge where the water meets the sand. Thereâs a trail that Steve once found when he was nine. It had been during the last fishing trip he had ever taken with his dad. The man commanded him to hook the worm and Steve cried. Embarrassed and ashamed, Steve had run towards where the sand met the woods and found a meadow hidden within it.Â
There are flowers in full bloom within the meadow, and you gasp when you see their vibrant pinks and blues. The flowers are delicate yet their stems are long. Steve sets the picnic basket down and pulls a blanket out from it. He sets it onto the grass and lays down, motioning you to join him.Â
The stars are clear tonight, shining bright above the two of you. They almost seem to wink at you as you lay side by side with Steve. His hand is in yours, as it always is these days, and with only the stars as his witness, Steve whispers into your ear, âThank you for staying.â
His breath warms your neck, and you know, without having to ask, what heâs thanking you for. Your promise to him last year, that youâd wait for him. He hadnât been ready. The timing of it all wouldnât have been right, but you knew, even back then, that youâd wait forever for Steve Harrington if it meant youâd receive even half of his love.Â
Take your time, Iâll be here.Â
âIt was the easiest thing Iâve ever done.â The words come easily to you, raw with truth and vulnerability.Â
A soft sigh escapes Steve. He turns his head to you, eyes finding yours, and youâve never seen such tenderness within him. He opens his mouth, sighs out the words youâve longed to hear again since that night at Starcourt. âI love you.â
âI love you, too.â You donât think youâll ever tire of saying those three words to him. Thereâs so much love within you, so much youâve ached to give out ever since you were a little girl, and now you finally can.Â
Steve kisses you with a softness that releases a sigh from your own lips, and you know heâs wholly, truly, yours now. With a swift motion, Steve places himself on top of you as you kiss. His weight presses down on you, one hand cups your cheek and the other steadies him. His hair tickles your face, his cologne clouds your brain, and the sweet taste of July honey coats your tongue.Â
Minutes, maybe even hours, pass as you kiss Steve. Itâs lazy, no sense of urgency as your lips move against his. Itâs warm, itâs soft. Eventually he manages to pull himself away from you, heâs brought you here for other reasons tonight.Â
âHold on, I got you something.â Steve fixes his hair, clears his throat, and pulls out a container from the basket. He reveals a freshly baked loaf of banana bread on a beautiful glass plate. Thereâs a small, lopsided candle on top of it.
âYou came prepared tonight,â you tease him, still breathless from the kisses and love.
âMy mom did, actually. Sheâs the one who made this.â You sit up and look at Steve, wide eyed. He laughs at you, finding your stunned reaction endearing. âRelax, angel. She really wanted to bake you something, and I had to make up for allowing Russians to ruin your seventeenth birthday, didnât I?âÂ
Words escape you. Steveâs mom made you banana bread, a woman you have still yet to meet, though youâve only heard fond stories about. She had insisted on doing this kind thing for you.Â
Steve lights the candle and holds the plate up for you. âCâmon, make a wish, Y/N.â
You close your eyes, smiling, and the wish comes easily to you.
For time to stay like this, forever.
You blow the candle out, Steve cuts the banana bread, and you take turns feeding it to one another. The dessert is delicious, freshly baked and still warm. Itâs sweet and nostalgic and everything you could ever ask for.Â
When youâve finished eating, Steve claps his hands. âAlright, now onto the real event of the night!âÂ
You raise an eyebrow. âWhat, the kissing wasnât enough?â Steve makes a panicked noise and you laugh at him. âI was teasing, honey.â
âYou terrify me,â he huffs, before revealing a box from behind him, the very same one youâve been curious about all night.Â
âI aspire to be terrifying,â you stick your tongue out at Steve before turning the box over in your hands. Itâs light, lighter than you expected. âIs this my gift youâve been bragging about?â For months leading up to your birthday, Steve had been boasting about this amazing gift he had thought of, how he had convinced the party to help him.Â
âOpen it and find out.â Thereâs a glint in Steveâs eyes, yet you also see the shyness return as well. Heâs nervous to see your reaction, he wants more than anything to have gotten this right.Â
You roll your eyes at him but open the box. It isnât wrapped like your other gifts from Steve have been. Instead the box is made of a dark oak, and its lid opens with a soft click. The silver catches your attention first. Itâs a small chain with two silver ovals on opposite sides. In between the two ovals is a collection of charms.Â
âIs thisâŠ?â The charms are all roughly the same size, but each vastly different from the other.Â
Steve nods at you, rubs the back of his neck. âItâs a charm bracelet.âÂ
Moonlight reflects off of one of the charms, revealing it to be a frog, another one to be a cookie, and slowly you piece it together. Thereâs six charms, one for each member of the party. âSteve.â
âHave you figured it outâoomph!â He lands with a thud on his back as you attack him with a hug. Slightly out of breath, he laughs and wraps his arms around you. âIâll take that as a yes, then.â
âHow did you get the kids to do this?â You lay on top of him, blinking back tears as you hold the bracelet delicately in your hands to admire it.Â
Steve sighs in exasperation. âMoney and a lot of begging. They were all for picking out charms for you, I just had to pay them to spend more than five minutes with me at the jewelry store.â
You laugh, that sounds exactly like them, and you love those kids with everything within you. Holding up the frog pendant, you know which kid picked it out for you. âMike?â
âYup. Said something about Kermit the frog?â
âHeâs such a little shit,â you say with fondness. Last year, when Billy had nearly choked you to death, your voice had been lost and Mike wouldnât stop referring to you as Kermit. Your fingers skim over the pendant next to it, a simple blue one, and you smile. âDustin?â
âHe told me about your code blues.â Steve rubs your back, content to have you resting against him. You hum, touched that your brother trusted Steve enough to confide this to. No one else knows about your code blues, itâd been a special thing just between the two of you.Â
With your ear pressed against his chest, listening to his heartbeat, Steve explains the rest of the charms to you. His voice is lazy, slow, lilting with fondness, and his hand a firm weight against your back. Max chose a knife charm to remind you of how badass you are. Will chose a bee, because heâll always be your little bee. Lucas was able to find a small, white flower that resembles a dogwood, knowing that itâs your favorite. As for El, she chose a cookie based solely on her love for the ones you bake for her.Â
âWhat about the ovals?â You ask Steve after heâs done explaining what the kids chose for you. The ovals are slightly larger than the charms, almost serving as a divider between them. The metal is smooth underneath your fingers.Â
He brushes hair out of your face and winks. âTurn them over.â
With slight confusion, you do, and discover that theyâre engraved. Etched onto the back of one oval is honey, and, on the other, angel is written. Theyâre your names for one another, nestled between charms from the kids you love so dearly in your life; this is a gift made from pure, unadulterated love.Â
âOh my god,â itâs perfect, absolutely perfect. Your lips are all over Steveâs face before he even has time to blink. You scatter millions of kisses upon his face, drown him in them, With every kiss that you press upon his pretty skin, you shower him with praise. âThank you, thank you, thank you!âÂ
Steve laughs and tries to move his face away, but really he leans into the onslaught of love. His cheeks burn from smiling so hard and from the heat you always make him feel. He grabs your waist and enjoys the skin he holds. âYou like it?â
âI love it, Steve!âÂ
âDoes this make up for the whole Russian fiasco?â He asks, only joking a little bit. He still feels awful for dragging you into everything, but with time heâs learning to forgive himself. Before he overthinks it, Steve adds, âAm I now the best boyfriend in the world?â
His words make you blush, and you donât think youâll ever get used to Steve being yours. Youâve waited so long to be his, to hold him and kiss him like you do now. You cherish the feeling, the sensation of knowing a boy loves you the way that Steve does. âYouâve definitely redeemed yourself for getting me trapped in a Russian lair on my birthday. And youâre definitely the best boyfriend in the world.â
Steve, despite being underneath you, does a victory dance and whoops into the night. Heâs elated, his face shines when you look down at him, and youâve never been so in love before. You once thought you knew what love was, what the burn of it could feel like. But now, with Steve lying beneath you as his arms keep you from falling, you know that love is airless, light, cool to the touch and warm on the skin. Love isnât supposed to hurt, itâs supposed to feel like coming home after a long day of being out in the cold.Â
After Steve helps you put on the charm bracelet, you lay together in the meadow. The lakeâs waves can be heard in the distance. Crickets chirp their greeting, the stars wink hello above you. Their noises serve as a lullaby to you, soothing you to an almost sleep-like state. You nestle your head into the crook of Steveâs neck and let out a sleepy exhale.Â
Feeling this, Steve strokes the back of your hair. âYou fallinâ asleep on me, Henderson?â
âIâm resting my eyes.âÂ
âVery convincing,â he chuckles, tightening his embrace to try and stave off the cold that creeps in. He lets out his own tired sigh, your weight upon him has always put him at ease. He inhales, smells your perfume, and he canât believe that heâs here right now with you. After everything heâs been through, he canât believe that somehow heâs come out of it with you next to him. Last year he thought he had lost you forever. This year he can see forever with you. âI think I like this July a whole lot better than the last one.â
Itâs meant to be a joke, a gentle tease. More of a reflection of how far the two of you have come in such a short amount of time, but still Steveâs words remind you of something. Youâve never told him the real reason why you left last summer. Why you ran away from him.Â
âI was scared, last summer.âÂ
Steve tilts his head at you. âScared of what?â
âI was scared of falling in love with you,â the confession lifts from your chest. It hangs over you both, the weight of it tangible. Steveâs eyes soften, he lets out a soft oh, and you duck your head shyly. âLast July, you wereâŠÂ Everything. You were everything to me, and it terrified me. I was still figuring my feelings out for Jonathan back then, you had Nancy, but you were so lovely and I justâI couldnât do it. It wouldnât have been fair, not to anyone, but Iâm sorry.â
âY/NâŠâ Steve hadnât known. All this time, he thought he had done something wrong. But really you had been trying to protect yourself, protect him, and he understands now why you had to leave him for a while. He sees the distress on your face and he shushes you, kisses your forehead. âDonât apologize, okay? I honestly wouldâve run away too, if I were you. Iâm just⊠You came back to me, in the end. Thatâs all I care about.â
Heâs too good for you. âI still hurt you.â
âYouâre human,â Steve brushes more hair out of your face. âWe all make mistakes. You ditched me for a few months and I almost got you killed by crazy Russians. I think weâre pretty even now.â
Despite the guilt in your throat, Steve manages to draw a smile from you. Itâs what heâs always done best. Even on the day Will had gone missing, he had been the one to ease the loss by pretending not to have known your name. He had made you laugh when you thought you could never laugh again. Steve would do anything to get you to smile, and you cannot imagine where youâd be without him. âWe always even our debts, huh?â
âItâs tradition at this point.â
And you laugh, full-bellied and loud and recklessly. It echoes into the night, Steveâs reverberates into your ears, and youâre happy.Â
âÂ
A month passes, and in the mid-August heat, Jonathan knocks on your window late one night.Â
His knuckles rap against the glass and itâs a sound reminiscent of before, when you were little kids who didnât know how yet to hurt each other. You crawl out of your bed, curious, though happy nonetheless to let him in.Â
You go to open your curtain, ready to tell the boy all about what Dustin had done today, unaware that when you open the curtain, everything will change.Â
Jonathan is crying.Â
âBee, oh my God.â You quickly open the window and he manages to crawl through, though sobs wrack his body. Heâs shaking, and for a terrifying moment you think that something has happened to Will. âIs everything okay?â
He stands before you, chest heaving and eyes red, and with two words your world comes crashing down. âWeâre moving.â
Time stands still. Youâre seventeen and your childhood is coming to a close.
Somehow youâre holding onto Jonathan as he explains everything through his tears. Heâs moving in early September, going all the way to California. He and his family are leaving Hawkins, leaving you.Â
Your legs give out, or maybe itâs Jonathanâs, but you hold each other on the floor, intertwined, mourning the loss of growing up together. Your tears mix with his, his breathing becomes yours. The two of you cling onto each other, scared that one day soon youâll never be able to do this again.Â
âWe need toââ Your breathing is shaky, your eyes sting. You feel a desperate franticness claw out of you, you grasp at what little sanity you have left. âWe need to promise each other thatâthat weâll see each other every day before you leave, in some capacity. Itâit doesnât matter how butââ
âIâve already talked to Nancy about it, bug.â Jonathan wipes your tears, lets his own fall freely. He knew youâd say this, and he loves you all the more for it. âItâs been agreed.â
You nod, relieved. It isnât much, it still doesnât change the fact that Jonathan will leave you in the end, but at least youâll make every last second with him count. Youâll move into the Byers home if you have to, theyâre your family. Heâs your person. Heâs embedded into your skin, heâs nestled between your bones.Â
Last year you and Jonathan promised you would never let go of each other.Â
The year prior to that you promised each other that nothing would change between you two.Â
Now, holding onto each other as the world youâve been building together for five years comes crumbling down, you have to believe that the promises will be enough.
â
Steve and Robin rope you into helping them find a new job.
You innocently pointed out that Family Video was hiring, figuring it was an easy enough place to work at, and suddenly the two of them had shoved you into Steveâs car with resumes in their hands. Honestly, you shouldâve seen it coming.Â
âYou put your mom down as a reference?â Robin questions Steve as you all get out of the car. She had agreed to proofread it after you politely declined, stating that if you proofread anything Steve wrote, it might ruin your relationship.Â
âYeah, why not?â Steve slams his door, straightens his shirt, and grabs your hand as you walk inside. âSheâs like, super well respected.â
You share a look with Robin. âRich kids,â you both groan at the same time. As much as you love Steve, youâll neve quite get over how well connected he is. Itâs bizarre and slightly terrifying how much the Harrington name can get you in this town.
âWhatever, call me a rich kid, but itâs my car you guys get free rides in.â
Robin rolls her eyes. âYouâre such a dingus.â
âI didnât ask to be here,â you remind Steve, though you thank him when he holds the storeâs door open for you and Robin. âI think this could count as kidnapping.â
Robin bumps her hips against yours. âNot technically. Besides, I thought we agreed to leave our kidnapping days behind us after Erica?â
You shove the teen and follow her into the store. You look around at all the movies, slightly impressed. Youâve never really visited Family Video before, only really stopping by if you were picking up Dustin from the arcade next door. The store is nice, albeit small, but you can see Steve and Robin enjoying themselves. Thereâs good music, few customers, and the uniformed vest is less mortifying than Scoopâs small shorts and sailor hats. âItâs not so bad in here.â
âWhy thank you, pretty lady.â A greasy looking man at the register smiles at you, leaning over it in a very unappealing manner. His name tag informs you that his name is Keith.
Steve immediately steps in front of you and stares the guy down. âShe doesnât need you thanking her, buddy.â
You can tell that he wants to say more, but you see the âgeneral managerâ on Keithâs name tag and quickly try to deescalate the situation. If your idiot boyfriend wants the job, he canât piss off the guy hiring. âSteve, why donât we take a look around while Robin does all the talking?â
âWhatââ He doesnât have a chance to argue, youâre already pulling him down a random aisle, throwing a quick âgood luck!â to Robin as you leave.Â
She talks with Keith, and it seems to be going well. She shows him their resumes, smiles at him kindly. before she shouts across the store to Steve. âDingus, what are your three favorite movies?â
Steve nearly drops the movie he had been looking at. âUh, Animal House?â You can practically hear Robinâs disappointed sigh from where you stand, and Keith looks unimpressed. Panicked, Steve whispers to you, âWhat are my favorite movies?â
âI donât know!â You hiss, frantically trying to get this poor man a job. âJust, name two other movies. Animal House canât be too bad, right?â
âStar Wars,â Steve manages to get out, now walking back to the register. You stand next to him, looking nervously at Robin, who makes a pained noise at his responses.Â
The manager stares blankly at him. âA New Hope?â
âA new what now?â
You drop your head into your hands and sigh. Heâs hopeless. Already knowing itâs a lost cause, you mumble to him, âItâs a Star Wars movie, Steve.â
He snaps his fingers. âRight! Yeah, itâs the one with the teddy bears, isnât it?â Steve makes what you think is supposed to be an Ewok sound, which only makes you sigh again. Sensing heâs fucked up, Steve tries to backtrack. âNo? Uh⊠Oh! The one that just came out, the movie. The one with DeLorean and Alex P. Keaton and heâs trying to bang his mom.â
âOh, dear.â Itâs a trainwreck, one you canât look away from, and Robin can only shake her head at you. âSteve?â
âYeah?âÂ
âStop talking.â
âUh, yeah.â Steve clears his throat, he knows heâs rambling. Had he known he would have a goddamn pop quiz about movies, he wouldnât have dragged you here for the interview. âThose are my top three. Classics.â
Keith looks between you, Steve, and Robin. He points to Robin first, âYou start Monday.â He points to Steve, âYou start never.â And then he points to you, âYou can start whenever.â
âOkay, I get why youâre telling me no,â Steve waves a hand in front of you, âbut she didnât even apply!âÂ
Youâre also confused by how this day is turning out, and you look at Robin, wide eyed and pleading. Sheâs good with people, Keith seems to like her. When she sees you silently begging her to fix this, Robin sighs and steps in front of Steve. âWill you just, um⊠Will you guys give us a minute?âÂ
âWhy?â Steve doesnât move, and you want to throw a shoe at him.Â
âLetâs go, pretty boy.â You grab the back of his shirt and yank him back to the aisle of movies. He doesnât fight you, he simply accepts his fate and allows you to drag him away. Before turning the corner, you nod at Keith. âThanks for the job offer, but you should really give it to the guy Iâm currently dragging.â
Robin snickers at Steveâs offended huff as the two of you leave, before she starts trying to convince the manager to let Steve work there. From where you stand, it seems like a heated discussion. You try to lean closer, nosey, and while youâre distracted, Steve runs into a life-sized cardboard cutout of Phoebe Cates wearing a red bikini.Â
He fights with it, tries desperately not to let it fall, all while his resume hangs from his mouth. âShit! Oh, Fast Times! Ever heard of it? Top three for me, Keith.â Robin laughs and Steve turns the cardboard cutout to you, wiggling his eyebrows. âOwn any red bikinis?â
You flick his forehead, though you laugh as well. âIn your dreams.â
âI can sleep right now and find outââ
âI will flick you again.â
âA kiss is preferred, but whatever.â
âÂ
When the Byers move, you spend the entire day fighting back tears as you help them pack.Â
You spent the night in Jonathanâs room, both of you dreading the morning to come. Neither of you had slept, instead spending the entire night taking turns sharing your favorite memories together. The day you met. The time a dog chased you. When Jonathan mistook your sweater for his and wore it to school. Late night drives. Movie nights with your brothers. You relive it all that night.Â
As the morning sunlight began to stream into Jonathanâs room, the warmth the memories brought started to fade away. Slowly, as the sun rose, you and Jonathan packed his room. You helped him organize his vinyls, sort through his mixtapes. When he isnât looking, you steal a few t-shirts and flannels from his closet. He wonât notice theyâre gone until heâs halfway to California.Â
When it gets too much, seeing all of Jonathanâs life dwindling down to only a few boxes, you wander into the living room and help Joyce pack as well. She sees the tears in your eyes and gives you things to do, but eventually you canât take it anymore. You go into Willâs room, and itâs the same. You cry, he cries with you, and itâs bittersweet. The rooms empty, the boxes grow.
Elâs room is the hardest to pack, she has so few items to call her own, and youâre both silent as you move through the room together.Â
With each box that you tape full of things you grew up with, you feel a piece of your childhood being packed away as well. The plates you used to eat off of, the books you used to bring from your job, the toys you passed down to Will. Itâs all there, pieces of you frozen in time.
As you tape a box labeled âgamesâ in Jonathanâs messy handwriting, you hear Max and Lucas singing in the living room. The sound makes you smile. Itâs one of Maxâs better days, sheâs teasing Dustin for singing with Suzie, and sheâs in a good mood. The rest of the party keeps her occupied. The kids all arrived as early as Joyce allowed them to, Nancy and Mike were the first to knock on the door.Â
You place the box next to the others and walk towards Jonathanâs room. Heâs leaning against its door frame with Nancy beside him, and you join them. You stare at the empty room, the one youâve called your second home ever since you were twelve. It hurts, seeing it stripped of everything.Â
All of Jonathanâs boxes are in the living room, filled with the things that make him who he is. Thereâs a drawer in your room of things Jonathan has left over the years, and youâre never giving them back. Theyâre all you have left of him.Â
You and Jonathan take in his barren room, and you sigh against the door frame. âItâs so⊠empty.â
Nancy crosses her arms. âIs that everything?â
âI guess so,â Jonathan stuffs his hands in his pockets. His room feels cold somehow, its emptiness devoids it of the warmth it once had. He can still hear your laughs echoing in the floorboards, he can still smell your perfume that clings onto the walls. Thereâs scuff on the closet door from the time the two of you thought itâd be a good idea to play blind-folded baseball in the small room.Â
Jonathan steps into his room, taking it all one last time. The sunlight from his window illuminates his silhouette, making him appear even smaller within the room. âSeventeen years of my life⊠packed up in one day.â
His voice is melancholic, his body is sad. You nudge Nancy, nod your head in Jonathanâs direction, urging her to go after him. She nods, understands that youâre telling her to say goodbye, giving them the space to do so. She smiles at you appreciatively.
You do it because they love each other, but selfishly a part of you leaves because you canât say goodbye just yet.Â
âThank you,â she whispers, following after Jonathan.Â
You find El as sheâs leaving Joyceâs room. Sheâs holding a piece of paper, clutched closely to her chest. There are tears in her eyes, though you know better than to ask why. Itâs a sad day for everyone, youâll let her grieve on her own. However, that doesnât stop you from pulling the girl into a fierce hug.Â
âIâll miss you so much, sweetheart.â You mumble, kissing the top of her head. âI donât know whoâs going to paint my nails now.â
El laughs through her tears and holds you tight. âI can ask Mike to.â
You kiss her head again, close your eyes, and pray to whoever is above that this girl will stay who she is forever. That she will never change. Her kindness is genuine, her joy is admirable. All her life she only knew cruelty, and yet she still came out of it so full of love. âIâd love to hear how that goes.â
âI will write you,â El promises, and you nod eagerly at her. She pulls you in for one last hug before finally releasing you to go see Joyce.Â
The woman greets you with a tired smile when you walk into her room. Sheâs kneeling on the floor, folding clothes. Theyâre baggier than what she normally wears, darker, and you finally realize that theyâre Hopperâs.Â
A lump forms in your throat. She shouldnât be doing this alone, packing away the remnants of his life. âHere, let me help.â
Joyce accepts, and together you sit in comfortable silence as you go through the clothes Hopper left behind. They still smell like him, old cigarettes and whiskey. Itâs a nostalgic scene, a part of you wishes you could keep one of his shirts. He had been dear to you, regardless of the constant bickering you faced with him.Â
âI donât blame you, you know.â Joyce speaks softly next to you, catching your attention. âAt all.â
You look up at her, sucking in a breath. âI donât⊠I donât know what you mean, Mrs. Byers.â
âThe guilt, honey.â She places a hand on your arm, gentle as she always is with you. âI know you blame yourself for what happened to Will, but you shouldnât. You have to let go of it. I wantâŠâ Joyce pauses, looks into your eyes the way a mother does to her daughter. âI want you to promise me that youâll live the life that you deserve, because youâve spent half of your life making sure my boys lived the lives that they deserved. Can you do that for me?â
âIâŠâ Youâre crying, you donât know what to say. For years youâve carried the guilt of Willâs disappearance, and for even longer youâve done everything you could to ensure that he was loved. That Jonathan was loved. Never once had it felt like a burden to you, but Joyceâs words undoes something in you. âI promise.â
Joyce pulls you into her arms and hugs you, tears in her own eyes. She strokes your hair, hugs you as sheâs always done since you were a little girl. She echoes the final words that Hopper told you. âYouâre the best of them.â
Youâre not sure how long you cry in Joyceâs arms, but when she soothes you and wipes your tears away, she tells you to go find Will. Theyâre leaving soon, heâll want to see you, and you wish the woman one final goodbye before going to find her son.Â
Will ends up being in the hallway, you find him just after heâs said goodbye to Mike. You note the longing in his eyes, the uncertainty in his posture as his friend leaves. Thereâs a wistful look on his face, one that you once had on your own when Jonathan was around. Even if Will may not know yet, you do.Â
âHey, little bee.â
He turns around, the softness in his eyes when he sees you makes you homesick. âY/N!â
Will buries his face in your chest, and you hug him just as tightly back. Heâs grown so much since you first met him. Heâs no longer the shy little boy who had been afraid of his own shadow, and you canât believe you wonât get to finish watching him grow up. âI swear, youâre going to be taller than me next time I see you. Wonât be able to call you little bee anymore.â
âIâll always be your little bee,â Will squeezes you tighter, afraid to let go of you.Â
âGood,â you ruffle his hair, making him to laugh. âIâll miss you, but Iâm sure you already know that.â
âIâll miss you, too.â Willâs voice is wet, more tears come. He pulls away from you, he looks as if he wants to say something, but he stops himself. As if heâs afraid of something.
You frown. âHey, what is it?â
âIâm scared,â The words rush from his mouth. âWhat if⊠What if I donât make any friends?â He lowers his voice, looks around nervously, before trusting to say the words out loud to you. âIâIâm different, Y/N.â
Willâs fear hurts you to see, you wish you could do more, promise him that it will all be okay, but you canât. Instead, all you can do is kiss his cheek and hope he can feel all the love you have for him within it. All you can do is remind him that you will love him through it all. âYouâre the bravest kid I know. I have no doubt that youâll be fine. I mean, youâll have Jonathan and El with you, but if you ever need me, Iâm just a phone call away. I love you, and that will never change.â
You stroke the boyâs cheek with your finger, and he leans into the gentle touch. âIâm rooting for you, always.â
Will squeezes you tight when he hugs you for the last time. He thanks you, his body relaxes into yours, and you know that in the end heâll be okay. Heâs a brilliant kid, heâs been through more than anyone else his age ever has. Heâs resilient, his kindness is his strength, you just hope that he can recognize that himself one day.Â
As you pull away from the hug, Willâs eyes catch on someone, you turn around. Itâs Jonathan, standing by the front door, waiting for you.Â
Itâs time to say goodbye.Â
Taking a deep breath, you walk towards him, and Jonathan takes your hand and guides you to the porch outside. Everyone else is still inside, packing. You sit side by side in silence, absorbing the final remaining moments alone with each other. Saying goodbye to your childhood best friend leaves a bitter taste in your mouth.Â
A ladybug crawls on a leaf next to you, a bee flies past you and lands on a sunflower nearby, and a bird chirps in the blue sky above. You rest your head on Jonathanâs shoulder, he presses a kiss to your temple. Your fingers interlock and the cool September air surrounds you.
âI made you something,â Jonathan breathes out, clears his throat. He reaches into his back pocket and pulls out a mixtape, its front covered with a piece of paper listing all the songs on it. âI, uh, used the money I won from the betting pool to make it. Dustin was pretty annoyed with me for winning.â
You snort at the image of your brother berating your friend for winning a betting pool about how long itâd take Steve to ask you out. Taking the mixtape from Jonathan, you read the songs. Thereâs eight songs on it, the first one being a Beatles song from your childhood; you donât know how Jonathan knew that. Though most of them are familiar, the writing on the paper is old, faded with age. âHow long have you been making this, bee?â
Jonathan looks away from you and swallows. âA while, I guess. Listen to it after I leave, okay? That way, if you hate it, Iâll never have to know.â His demeanor is odd, thereâs something heâs not telling you, but itâs your last day with him. You leave it alone for now, not wanting to ruin it.Â
âYouâre not allowed to find a new best friend.â You tell him instead, the silence becoming too much to bear. Itâs a joke, though truthfully you donât want Jonathan to find another best friend. Heâs supposed to be yours, only yours, and youâre supposed to be his.Â
âI wouldnât dream of it.â Jonathan lets out a soft laugh, and youâre going to miss feeling the way his body moves as he does so. He sucks in a breath, releases it slowly, and shakes his head. âI mean, we were kids together, bug.â
You start to cry, and he does as well. Youâve never had to say goodbye to each other before. Not like this. The two of you sit on the porch of Jonathanâs childhood home and cry. You cry into his neck, he buries his face into your hair, and itâs all so unfair.Â
Jonathan touches his forehead to yours. You look into his eyes and know that your childhood will always live within him, and his within you. Jonathan brings his finger up to your bee necklace, his ladybug ring knocks against the pendant. The jewelry glistens in the sunlight.Â
âBee, we were more than just kids together.â
And itâs true. You were everything together. Now, you have to figure out how to be everything while apart.Â
âÂ
The last of the boxes are placed in the moving van. Everyone is crying, youâre all gathered around one another, hugging and saying goodbye.Â
You hold El tight and whisper good luck to her. You remind Will that everything will be okay, knowing how scared heâs been of high school and remorseful that he has to do it all alone. The kids all cry as they share the final hugs, Jonathan and Nancy cry as they hold one another. Everyone says goodbye, and you watch them with tears in your eyes. You turn to Joyce to kiss her cheek, but she grabs your arm instead.Â
âRemember what you promised me, okay?â She catches your eye, makes sure you hear what sheâs telling you. âLive the life that you deserve.â
âI will,â you exhale, and she seems content with that. Joyce hugs you, kisses your cheek, and you tell her to drive safe as she gets into the van.Â
Jonathan stands by his car, waiting for you, and you pull the boy into your arms. He crashes against you, clutches you to his chest, and you breathe him in one final time. âIâll always love you the most, bee.â
âAnd Iâll always love you the most, bug.âÂ
Joyce drives away first, El in the van with her, before Jonathan and Will follow. The car pulls out of its driveway one final time, and you hold Nancyâs hand as you both cry. Slowly, their cars fade into the distance, and one by one the kids hop on their bikes and pedal away. No one wants to stay, the empty house feels too permanent, solemn. Eventually Nancy gets into her own car, wishing you a quiet goodbye, until itâs just you and your brother standing in front of the house.Â
Dustin stays beside you, as he always does, and you take a deep breath. Nothing will ever be the same again.Â
You take one last look at the Byers home, the house you grew up in and discovered pure love and joy and naivety in, and inhale the final scent of your childhood. Dandelions are in bloom, its yellow surrounds the home, soon they will wilt and its seeds will litter the sky
Joyceâs words ring in your head.
Itâs time to live the life that you deserve. Youâre on your own now, though you know that really you arenât. Dustin is next to you, Steve and Robin are waiting at your house with movies stolen from work because they knew how hard today would be. Your mother has your favorite cookies ready and waiting for you. Mike and the others have already planned their first letter to Will.Â
The charm bracelet from the party and Steve is cool against your wrist.Â
Youâre no longer the scared, angry twelve year old you had been when you first moved to Hawkins. Youâre loved, you have so many incredible people in your life who now get to watch you grow up into someone new.Â
Slowly, you exhale your childhood, with a single promise of keeping it within you forever. To live the life that Joyce has told you that you deserve.
And you believe her.Â
[END OF SEASON THREE]
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â series masterlist
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#steve harrington x henderson!reader#steve harrington x reader#steve harrington x you#stranger things#steve harrington fanfic#stranger things rewrite#slowburn#angst#nya#m's writing#WE HERE !!!!#ONE MORE CHAPTER LEFT#THEN WE ONTO FOUR !!!
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Part 3 for immortal!reader? Can be last chapter, just wanna see Ghost and Soap reaction. Price just explaining or still laughing his off or Gaz just passing out from too much shock.
"sorry for getting shot guys"
"how- what- huh?" Soap stammering.
Ghost still has his hands around Price's collar, Price was still chuckling, cigar on the floor, never belly-laughing this hard before.
Gaz staring at the reader, face paling before his does the cartoon faint, his legs going in the air while his hat flipped before falling.
Reader just staring like it was the norm (probably because it was for her/him)
no one reacts. its quiet, you can't help but awkwardly swallow and rub your throat slightly.
you can hear price sighing, obviously he knew you weren't going to stay dead, but it was still something you weren't overly fond of experiencing.
you felt some pain- but it was mostly none, after all, it wasn't as though you didn't die, you just didn't stay dead.
gaz swallows before his eyes roll into the back of his head, falling backwards and landing on his back, staring up at the sun. you give him a worried glance, but your muscles are still stiff, so you opt for just slightly calling out to him.
you don't get to, however, as someone's gloved hands grasp your face in their hands. you can hear soap as he slams price against the post once more, but your attention is taken away by ghost.
"what the fuck was that," he all but growls, his voice low and gravely, sending still shocks through your chest. "you didn't think to tell us about yer' little fuckin' stunt, huh?"
you swallow, reaching up to grab his wrist. soap moves from wherever he's standing and you vaguely see a figure attending to gaz. "look at me."
ghost isn't happy, the bile that threatened to rise out of his throat had setteld, but now theres steam practically flowing from his ears, theres a ringing he can't shake and his heart is pounding so hard he wonders if you could hear it.
"lighten up, lieutenant." price speaks as ghost loosens his grip on your head, letting out a puff of air through his nose. "they were given strict orders not to reveal anything until told otherwise, or during an emergency."
"captain, i don't think being upset with me counts as an emergency-"
"when i make a decision, you're supposed to trust that i'm making the right one," price isn't mad, but you're not interested in listening to him after he basically tried to kill you.
"Ye cannae ask us tae trust ye when ye've jist shot someone in the heid, cap'n."
"i'll ask whatever i bloody please, soap." price fixes his vest before turning away, not storming, but definitely walking somewhere with slightly more anger than usual.
"yer aight, pet?" soap gives you a once over, not able to look you in the eyes, before he gets shiver up his spine and has to walk away to cool himself down.
gaz - in the middle of the commotion - had been picked up and taken to the infirmary, leaving you.
and ghost.
h u h ?? im so sorry for the horrible scottish accent soap has I DO NOT KNOW HOW TO WRITE IT VERY WELL.
do we like? do we not like?? what will ghost do?? HMM??
#john price#john soap mactavish#kyle gaz garrick#shmalk ! á§âĄá§#simon ghost riley#task force 141#141 x reader#john price x reader#johnny mactavish x reader#kyle garrick x reader#immortal!reader#monster!reader
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Crown Corp.
A Resident evil inspired AU for Cult of the Lamb
[ Chapter 1 ]
"Crown Pharmaceuticals prides itself in it's consistent advancements in vaccine development, ground breaking medical treatment and research. A place a budding biochem student like Lambert had been hoping to someday work, studying hard to get their degree and with an internship all but secured, things were looking good. At least until disaster struck, now Lambert finds themself in a nightmare they can't wake up from."
im SO excited to finally post this first chapter and im VERY very happy with it so far!! i say this a lot because im just very self conscious but i really hope what i wrote makes sense as someone who very rarely writes but i do love writing as a hobby!! and im already writing more as we speak roithgrthrth
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