#but im glad i kept going with it bc i got to a point where i sorta captured the lighting i was going for

[raspberryhell]

YOU. YOU WOUND ME WITH YOUR RQG ANIMATICS /POS

Are you still in the fandom?

hey! sorry its taken me we few weeks to answer this, but thank you! I am glad that even years later, those videos are still as effective as I hoped they would be as I was making them haha

and uh, as for the question, I want to answer honestly about why I stopped posting art here the last few years and what I plan to do from here on out...

the main thing I want to express is that, for the last few years, I've found it hard to be in ANY fandom simply bc I am too busy with stuff irl to keep up with most fandoms outside of my lil friend circles. It might've been obvious from how I was posting about wrapping up my degree in 2022 and how around that time I stopped posting my art online, but I really just got caught up with writing my final thesis, graduating, working full time, living on my own, and a whole buncha other personal things that meant that I had very very very little time for my hobbies.

I also work in education, and in my area, full-time education jobs are few and far between. I currently work 2 part-time jobs, but at some point I was working 4................ I am lucky I only had to do that for like half a year, but I was working so much I was literally catching up on sleep during lunch breaks in my car and when I WAS home I was just floundering in bed because I was so tired. Things are better now though, just saying to illustrate how dire things were at one point lol

And even with that small amount free of time I had, I uhhh played a lot of splatoon 3 at first instead lol. I later modded my 3DS (two of them actually after the first broke) and thats where a large amount of my free time went for a while. I was still drawing but it was definitely much much less often than I was used to while I was still a college student. In all honesty, for like a year or so my drawing skills straight up deteriorated from lack of use.

Eventually I started bookbinding in my free time, which then lead me to an interest in fountain pens. It was with this new hobby I picked up last year that I finally felt ready to return to drawing again. It was kinda of scary when I used my digital art tablet for the first time in forever and everything felt strange and uncomfortable to use again. I could barely draw a simple head shot, much less full body character art, so I spent a lot of time just drawing patterns and shapes over and over again until the character-drawing-flow came back to me.

So for like the last half year I've been drawing again! It has been a lot of OCs that I have been developing in my head for a while, but also some random fan art of whatever it is I was playing/reading/watching at the time.

I never got around to posting what little art I was making bc 1) I thought none of it was good enough to be my "come back" idk why I feel like the first thing I post here again has to be mind-blowingly good, but its something thats kept me back for no reason. 2) I felt bad for like a year for dropping off making RQG art so hard that I felt like I would be judged a little on if my "come back" was or wasn't RQG-related. Like some other artist friends kept making RQG art and thats cool, but others were moving on to other things which was cool too, and I felt a little like I had to make a "choice" on which way I was going to "go" 3) I just in general am less "online" than I was as a college student. I'm no longer on top of fandom memes and art trends which might just be me growing from being a teen to being an adult but it also makes me less enthusiastic to "participate in fandom" on the daily.

Also sometimes it feels too shallow or silly to be spending my time on making fan art (early-onset-midife-crisis feelings of 'oh god what even do I want to do with my life im 26 now, over a quarter of a way to 100, which not everyone lives to, so am I really going to be spending more of my limited life time just chasing after attention from the relentless depression-inducing content-farm that is social media?') But that's just one side of my brain and the other says 'shut up it doesnt have to be like that lol'. So I'm trying to interact with "fandom" in ways that avoid large social media interaction.

my main way to "participate in fandom" lately is just to scroll here on tumblr, talk to a few friends over discord, and sometimes make random forum/wiki accounts in places where my interests lie and make conversation/contributions there. So the last few months I've been contemplating HOW to get back on the horse of sharing art again. At first I thought bluesky was the answer, and I made an account there and posted a few things, but I haven't actually been vibing well with the site. Me leaving twitter felt impossible just a few years ago, but bluesky feels like twitter2 which doesn't interest me at all now.

Some friends showed me this site called SheezyArt lately, which I really like as a place to simply post art and leave, so that will be where I try to keep a bulk of it for now. Over the next few weeks I am going to be posting my backlog of random drawings from the last few years, aka all new art that's not been posted anywhere before (RQG, professor layton, higurashi, dangan ronpa, and adventure time art are all on the list, fandom-wise). Once I am all caught up there, I will consider posting them individually on tumblr here (or maybe on a new art dump side account? I'm still considering my options there)

What I really want is to focus more of my creative energy on original projects rather than fanart and stuff (not knocking it at all, just feeling a change in what I capital w Want out of my art and my life), though I will probably still be making more of it out of habit. But hopefully my stuff is interesting to those who have followed me so far for fan art!

To that end, I started coding a Neocities website that I think I am finally ready to share after working on and off on it for nearly a year now. Both this site and my Sheezyart are sort of being soft-launched with this post, I will make a more nice-looking one later, but for now, those who are interested in my art enough to read this far get the privilege to know about it early haha

RaspberryHell at SheezyArt & Raspberryhell.neocities.org

anyways, theres your reward for reaching out and asking me this question and for anyone else who is still bothering to read this lol

tdlr: I was busy for like 3 years but I made a website and a sheezyart account and that's how I will be in "fandom" for now (on top of my regular tumblr scrolling) so I can post art and tell yall about things on my mind. :)

[crowleys-hips]

ventish post

i feel like i sort of ceased to exist since july. i felt a blow nearly as hard as one i felt 4 years ago when i lost someone who's still very dear to me. and since then stuff has just kept happening and happening and happening and i stopped writing my novel and fell back on old bad habits and it really has felt like an exile of sorts. i've expressed it better in some of my poems, both GO and non GO, but that's just the tip of the iceberg tbh.

and i didn't even notice when, but i've recently realized that i also sort of stopped reading, when i used to read every day, all the time. now i sometimes manage to read maybe a short one shot. idk what's happened to me, but i feel like i've lost a huge part of me and years of my youth. like a christian finding out jesus' body has recently been found. or worse, like he never existed. and now it's hard to know where to put my faith in. i guess the right answer should be myself. but i've never known how to live for myself alone. but i want to learn. otherwise this will keep happening. and i know i should go back to therapy, but i feel like im too sick for therapy, if that makes sense.

anyway, my point is that, im really trying to get back on my feet. try to really exist again. act like a human and not fall back on my ghost tendencies. but everything is so overwhelming, like there's so much to do i end up not doing any of it. i stare at all my unread books and fics ive saved for later and im afraid later won't ever come. like i'll never catch up. and it kills me. bc i want to know more of all these brilliant minds, but ive been buried under the rubble of my dreams. im a writer who's forgotten how to read. im an artist who's forgotten how to hold a pen. a musician who now only stares at the piano longingly. my plants are dying and i let them. i want myself back, and i really am trying, but most of the time it feels like i go one step forward and three steps back. i just don't know how to deal with so much death without feeling like i also died. im trying so hard to dig myself out, and prove im not dead yet, but i keep falling asleep, and haunting my own dreams. but im fucking trying. i swear i am.

finally did some watering and pruning yesterday. started a painting and failed miserably but at least now i know what to not do. didn't drink for two nights in a row. my streak was 2 and 1/2 months lol. still writing poems, trying to write more again. i got today free, so i think i'll use today to just let myself read again and try not to feel guilty that "i'm not doing anything" bc i am. watching this fandom's great supportive, caring, and positive attitude has helped. and ofc my dearest friends and my beloved. despite everything, im glad i found this place.

[rons-hypnotic-eyes]

Ch 166 spoilers

I WASNT COMPLETELY DELUSIONAL????????

Elliot was alive??? I’m literally losing my mind.

But why was Toto kept in the dark about things? It looks like Ron possibly knew about it all and arranged it so Elliot won’t get killed?

But I’m also surprised no one wanted to check Elliot’s pulse ahshsjshdj (I mean I guess Ron wasn’t worried but everyone else??)

Ok. I got some more things I wanna talk about.

First time glad there’s an explanation for why spitz saved them so opportunely during the auberge case. I felt it weird at the time but chalked it up to “the protagonists can’t die” but IM SO HAPPY THERES A REAL REASON.

The last 3 murders felt weird. Some friends and I discussed and what if they’re not dead? What if Elliot (because he didn’t wanna murder people but needed to keep the game going. Because he went though a ton of trouble to protect one guy that later led to the auberge case) has been faking their impossible deaths and then sending them home.

I mean there’s still the guy “killed” by a shark at the beginning who had no tags… why wasn’t there a tag for him???? Was he not planned to be there? But Alice would have planned for everything, did she just assume he would jump and die to scare the others???

I posit instead that Elliot has been “killing” people and replacing their bodies or idk how but then the shark guy is getting them off island. Like I always felt bad for Vincent (the first dead dude) bc he showed a real pic of his family and said he wanted to go home for them. And the next morning he was dead. What if Elliot wanted to save him to send him home???

I’m still under the delulu that possibly gorgeous was romi Holmes. I mean romi has to know Elliot is alive right? Why would he fake his death all those years ago if not to break ties with the m family and live happily with romi?? But why keep secret from Ron? He was traumatized by that. Is this why she’s never around Ron, because she wants to be with Elliot??

LASTLY I’m surprised Alice didn’t do anything specific to stop Toto. Like she has to know he’s been saving people from Ron’s hypnosis. He’s done it a ton of times. But he just happened to hurt his ankle. It’s possible that wouldn’t happen, so she wasn’t worried?? She wanted/needed Ron to kill Cesar with his power. But she didn’t do anything specific to prevent him from moving. She saw him hurt his ankle I guess?? I’m just surprised she didn’t attempt to incapacitate him more.

I’m STILL mad that Toto was kept in the dark. He hurt himself. I wonder if Ron wanted him to dramatically save Elliot at the end and get hella aura points but NOPE. He left Toto to alone to get injured. Ahhhh Ron you better apologize hella fast and protect ur partner better. What was the reason for ignoring him????

Ok. I think I’m enjoying this arc way way way more now. It feels like it makes way more sense why everyone’s being weird. It’s possible Ron knew they were fake murders from the beginning and why he didn’t solve things super duper fast. I always felt it weird that he wasn’t actively trying to solve things the entire time, he wasn’t just going around and being like hmmm yep there’s a dead guy. (LIKE WHAT HAPPENED TO THE BODIES AFTER?? Did they just leave them where they were? Did they put them somewhere????)

I think that’s all I got. For now dhjsdhjsdhsj I’m still losing my mind that I had figured out Elliot. I just felt it weird that Alice wanted Ron to solve his murder. It just felt so unconnected to the current island stuff. Unless Elliot was alive of course. Which he was! And it ties better with Alice’s plan to have Ron solve his dad’s murder. If it was Ron that did it!! That was a good twist.

[my-castles-crumbling]

Anon(ish) Advice Asks - May 9

@ameliatheperson , @teasiswriter , hair anon, 100% anon, personal anon, folklore anon, therapist anon

@ameliatheperson

hi cas! this a bit of a vent/advice maybe? im not using anin bc I've talked about this on this acc anyway, but I just don't know what to do about this.

so I have severe scoliosis, right bordering the surgical threshold. it gets x rayed about every 6-9 months, since it's pretty likely to get worse as I become an adult. this should be fine, it's my reality. the only thing is that my back has been hurting a lot more than normal this past week, in the way that it did when my curve worsened after I stopped wearing my brace. I'm really anxious about it, because if I need surgery, it will ruin my entire senior year of highschool, and there's nothing I can do to prevent it from worsening and I can't even know whether it has gotten worse until August.

I know I shouldn't worry about things out of my control, but I just need to talk to someone about it. the thing is I hate talking to my siblings or parents because they get very uncomfortable whenever I talk about it (understandably) and I don't want to burden my friends and make them uncomfortable. there is one person who has gone through the same thing or almost, but tbh I don't know where I stand with her, it's complicated. we have a school counselor, but I'm scared to talk to her for a couple reasons. I'm just hoping you have any other ideas for what to do? I've tried to help by journaling, but that never really helps me. I'm sorry, this got so long!!!

Hi!

Wow, that sounds so scary, and I completely understand why you're anxious about it. I feel like you have the right ideas for what do do about it- talking, journaling, etc. Is there any way you can go to the doctor sooner to get peace of mind?

Either way, you're welcome to vent to me all you want! I can't pretend to understand but I'm always willing to listen, and venting about things can be really helpful. Remember to continue to wear your brace and do whatever else your doctor has said to do!

___

@teasiswriter

Hihihi so I have a ton of rings that I wear daily (9 in total, 6 on one hand and 3 on the other) and I kinda have a problem with “main character syndrome” I guess? In the sense that sometimes I do things hoping someone will compliment me or notice me, so I can have self esteem, but I’ve been shifting away from that and have been doing things for myself recently and I realized how good that people noticing me for actually being myself (and also, actually being myself) can feel!

In drama class someone commented on all the rings and so I just had like, a group of 5 people ask me about all of my rings and the stories behind them and I got to tell them. One of them said “yeah with your hand gestures and movements you were doing when you were talking I kept noticing them and was wondering about them all”

Like, oh my gosh???? People noticed my hand gestures???? I’m known for having hand gestures???? I barely noticed that about myself???? You like my rings????? Thank you they’re the way I express things I don’t know how to write???? They’re the trinkets I keep with me that make me feel safe???? Thank you for noticing my existence???????? I love you?????????

Anyways, it rocked and today was an okay day! Soooo yeah :D

hahaha this made me giggle because it's relatable. I think it's nice to be noticed for something you do to be yourself, you know? Like instead of doing something purposely to be noticed, you do something for yourself, and then STILL get noticed. It feels a hundred time better.

I'm glad you had a good day!

___

usaid anon

Hey its usaid anon,

So... fuck. Not to anything in paticular just what the fuck.

But the point of this ask is theres been word of a 15% cut in EVERY department WITHIN the state department. And the med department (the department my mom works for) isnt that big. Not to mention the are only 10 people with the job she has, meaning her name is up there. As she said theyre "an easy part of the 15"

Ive been trying to look on the bright side of everything so rn the small comforts are that i will 100% be staying until the end of the school year (3 weeks but as i said, small comforts) and there are pros of going back to the u.s. so far i have:

I could actually go to protests

Chipotle

Family

If it happens to my friend in china too we could see each other more often

I think thats it.

SIDE NOTE: FUCKING JD VANCE CAME HERE TO INDIA. Its so stupid. He went for his kids spring break but he didnt want to pay for it so he sceduled some meetings on the monday and then got his vacation for free bc it was technically a """""business trip"""""". Kind of funny thing about the visit tho. They obviously need staff from the embassy and they were struggling to find people willing to join bc it was vance. Which is rlly funny to me.

Im really trying to find a balance between being informed and knowing whats going on and not focusing on this ALL the time.

Hi <3

I'm so sorry, that's terrifying. I wish I could do something to help. I do have to say though, chipotle being on your list of positives is such a vibe. And you're not wrong at all.

I'm sending you so much love, and please keep me updated. I hope things turn out well for you and your family <3

___

hair anon

Hey, how’ve you been? Sorry for the incoming vent

I’m having a very bad gender day. It’s spirit week and I was asked to dress either emo or preppy but it made me super dysphoric and I wore my normal stuff. And I might be late for school because of all the different things I was changing in and out of to make myself feel better. I don’t even know what gender I want to look like. I don’t even know what name I want to be called. It makes me sad and angry for no reason. I don’t want to hate my body, I worked so hard to like it again. And my binder doesn’t help much. I hate my boobs and I hate my legs and I hate spirit week and I want to scream and cry and yell.

—Hair anon

Hey Cas, I’m sorry for another ask so soon

I’m just, having a very bad gender day again. My hair, my chest, my legs, everything. I can’t wear a binder because it causes me so much chest pain, and my parents won’t be thrilled if I ask for another one, so now I’m stuck, in the summer, with some big annoying boobs that won’t go away! They’re like, the forefront of ALL my normal sized shirts and make me sweat so much. If my bra is too loose it flops and if my bra ACTUALLY FITS ME it’s all big and in your face. I hate it. Like, I don’t even know how to style myself with my boobs. And summers in like, 2 months which is usually when I experiment with my style and stuff so I’m stuck looking like a massive weird freak.

Sorry. I shouldn’t say that. I learned that my thoughts about myself can actually become things I believe if I say them enough. I just feel so gross and insecure. I feel disproportionate.

I just can’t wait until summer, where I won’t be around my classmates 24/7, so I won’t get so many questions if I braid my hair to grow it out, or if I start dressing differently, etc.

My hair is just stressing me out. Everything is so stressful especially when my mind is insistent on fighting itself!! :(

Anyways, I’m sorry for the downer of an ask. Thanks for being a listening ear

—Hair anon

Hi hon!

Please don't be sorry! I totally understand having a Bad Gender Day, and it sucks SO much. The icky feeling of changing a million times, feeling all itchy in your skin, nothing feeling right...it's awful and I wouldn't wish it on anyone. You're always welcome to vent to me about that, and anything else. I wish there was something I could do </3 I'm proud of you for recognizing that your current binder isn't good for your chest. Have you tried TransTape? Sometimes it works better for people, depending on the shape of their body, or their other needs. If you do try it, make sure to follow the directions on ways to tape, and use oil to remove it. But yeah, a lot of people prefer it to binders!

___

100% anon

hii its 100% anon!

thank you sm for answering my ask<3

your like explanaition is so good bc ive been trying to undrstabd what it meens but now its clear!

and yeah ig i am kind of sure? or more or less sure that i dont like guys in a romantic way!

anyways thank you so much!

hope youre doing okayy<3

Yay, I'm so glad I could help! No problem at all!

____

folklore anon

folklore anon!

it took me a while to answer back but yeah..

i think youre right i shouldnt feel guilty abt how i feel but i still do and it sucks

but atleast,yes i had a great time there<3

my uncle gave me a kindle!

i hope youre having a great night/day

Yeah, it's definitely easier said than done- to not feel guilty. But I'm glad you had a great time! And a kindle is so exciting!

___

personal anon

heyy, its personal anon!

so my parents took us out last thursday for dinner, everything was good until they brought up grades abd school and how its "not my style" and how "i used to be so great" and how my grades are slowly dropping as if i dont already know that and hate myself for it!and guess what? they made me cry yay! so i went to the bathroom and cried for 5mins and didnt talk to them for the rest of the night<3 and the bext morning my mom was acting like nthg happened so yeah

Ugh that sounds AWFUL. And in public, too...I'd be so upset. I'm so sorry that happened. If you want to vent, I'm here <3

____

Therapist anon

Hi!

First of all, your sister sounds like a pain. Like yes, she's acting her age, but she's being annoying, and that's okay to say.

Honestly, Instead of just going to your parents and complaining, I would approach it like "___ is happening. What do you think I should do?" For example, "Sister keeps kicking me out even when I'm sick. What should I do?" And then see what they say. Don't say it sarcastically, say it like "You guys are smart, responsible adults. What do I do?" (even if you don't feel that way). Like.. make your problems their problems. Make THEM figure out a solution.

And if they won't? Idk, it's probably shit advice because it's not the nicest, but I'd probably find a way to make it their problem in another way. Like when you get kicked out, go sit with your parents and talk their ears off. When your sister won't hand you a pad, call your parents and ask them to hand you one. Make it their problem, because like...you're doing your best to cohabitate, so she needs to as well.

I hope things get better and your shoes are still perfect!

[sentience-if]

okay, i agree with your Batman opinions 100% buT ALSO, TO BE FAIR TO BATMAN: HE DID ORIGINALLY TRY TO KILL THE JOKER WHEN JASON DIED. THEY JUST RET-CONNED THAT FOR "UNDER THE RED HOOD"

(by the way i am not posting this to fight or dismiss you. bc i agree with you. my intent is just to add to the discussion bc i love the nuance of both sides, but again, youre so right lol)

however, i disagree with this retcon. i think we shouldve kept Joker's almost-death, i think "Under The Red Hood" shouldve incorporated it via a Bruce-Alfred conversation or something, anything, just a flashback for a panel or so, something. and ill explain why in a sec, bc it makes Jason and Bruce's initial falling out all the more tragic, at least to me

but first, real quick tangent:

now, which idk if youve seen "Under The Red Hood" the comic and/or the movie, but the movie is infinitely better, bc of how it handled Batman and Jason's confrontation

comic-UTRH-Batman is a bitch for that Batarang to Jason's neck/shoulder, that panel had TOO MUCH BLOOD to not have been almost fatal, and i do not like the implications in it

bc movie-UTRH-Batman let Jason choose to kill the Joker if Jason wanted to, Bats just walked away until Jason shot at HIM and then was able to disarm Jason. but we have no reason to disbelieve that if Jason hadnt pointed the gun to Bruce, that if Jason had committed to killing the Joker, that Bruce would hace stopped him. i like that they made that decision in the movie, bc it shows Bruce isnt going to restrict others' free-will to his own moral-code if they disagree with him on SUCH a heavy topic, even if he thinks their choice is wrong, we have no reason to think Batman wouldve stopped Jason from killing Joker in the film

BUT IN THE COMICS?? Jason tries to shoot Joker, and Batman yells "NOOO!" and throws a Batarang into Jason's neck/shoulder with a TON of blood (people argue if it was a fatal hit or just a heavily-bleeding spot that wasnt fatal, but me?? fatal or not, i dont think he shouldve aimed to hit his own kid in such a graphic spot, tHAT'S HIS KID. he shouldve aimed for somewhere else or used a less sharp/damaging weapon wtf, why aim for such a blood-squirting area???), and that is fucked. comic-UTRH-Batman is fucked for that, bc thats CHOOSING the Joker's life over Jason's health (if not Jason's life, deoending if you think that hit was fatal). thats ooc, to me. that's too far

im glad the movie retconned that confrontation to instead be Batman walking away and Jason changing the gun to point at Bruce instead of the Joker, that was better. that showed Jason cared more about Bruce choosing to kill Joker rather than Bruce allowing Jason to kill Joker. does that make sense?? like, to Jason, in the movie, being right mattered less than Bruce; and to Bruce, Jason being allowed to do what he wanted mattered more than forcing Jason to follow Batman's own moral code. i liked that fight better. the comics with the Batarang sucked

anyway, tangent over lol

BUT in the original comics, before they retconned Batman's actions, he did try to kill the Joker for killing Jason. it's just... Joker stumbled into a checkmate of a chess-plan (bc this was before "Joker is a genius, actually" characterizations, this is chaotic gremlin of luck version of Joker) where Joker became a diplomat for a country and, if Batman killed the Joker, it would result in war. like. World War 3 levels of war

how did the Joker become a diplomat of a foreign country and become THAT important? i dont recall. again, this was chaotic gremlin of luck-Joker, he bumbled into situations that saved his skin a lot. also, Diplomat Joker looks wild as fuck, he still has that crazy smile and facial proportions, but now he has normal-human-skin, it looks Wrong lmao but yeah. Joker stumbled onto Jason and Jason's mom, Joker saw this as "another stroke of luck" for him to have bumbled into, he got too hooked in on beating up Jason, that it wasnt until he realized how bloody Jason was that he went "....oh wait, Bats is gonna kill me for this. uhhhhhhh" and proceed to make the bomb the cover up his tracks and RAN, he ran and somehow hooked his fingers into a diplomatic immunity position to make sure Batman couldnt kill him, at least not straight-away, he was buying himself time and originally planned to play dumb about Jason's death

bc Batman didnt originally have evidence Joker killed Jason. but he suspected it. and it took somewhere between a few days of being relentless about the Joker to maybe a few weeks? but when Joker (while still a diplomat) blurted out an insult to Bats that made it obvious Joker was involved in Jason's death?? Batman was like "oh thank god you said that, bECAUSE NOW I GET TO MURDER YOUR ASS"

BUT GUESS WHO STOPS BATMAN??

SUPERMAN. because Superman doesnt want there to be a war, tensions are too high to kill the Joker rn, Bats, you gotta let him live. and by the time the Joker is no longer that diplomat and Batman CAN kill the Joker?? it's been even MORE time. and Batman's vrief and Superman's insistence has formed into this warped moral code of being scared of himself and how easily he almost risked a World War 3, killing thousands and harming millions of would-be-war-victims with 0 cares or empathy about the people whod be hurt bc he HAD to kill Jason murderer— and that shit scared him. he was terrified of learning that about himself. this was not the moment he created his "do not kill" murder-code, he had it when Jason was alive and they once butted heads about it (aND, AGAIN, JASON WAS SO FUCKING RIGHT, EVEN THEN. this was about Felipe, by the way. it's implied Jason pushed him, but there's literally 0 evidence that Jason did or not, but Batman is CONVINCED Jason killed Felipe which good fucking riddance either way). but this was the moment that Batman became SO MUCH MORE attached to it, that id almost call it an unhealthy coping mechanism(? it probably is one)

and i find that aspect really fucking interesting. that Batman almost caused a war to kill Jason's murderer. and what's the most fascinating about to me, is i think we all know, that if Batman HAD killed the Joker then and there?? a resurrected Jason would be horrified. Bruce would still lose Jason. bc Jason has the kind of self-loathing and moral decency where he does NOT see himself as worth all of that pain and suffering and many lives that a war would take, period, but also especially not such a HUGE war as what wouldve broken out

i still think sometime post-diplomatuc-immunity and Jason's return, Batman shouldve killed the Joker. but i think the characterization in the comics of Bruce being so horrified with himself that he almost induced a war in the name of vegenence is interesting and Makes Sense that he would then be so hung up on never killing ever. i think an Alternate Universe that had Batman kill the Joker would be really fascinating if they kept the aspect that "and Bats doing that caused an international incident that imduced a devastating war" and STILL Jason would be opposing Bruce's morals. i like that idea of "no matter what Bruce does, Jason would still grow to be against him" tragic cycle

.....but comics-UTRH-Batman iS A BITCH FOR THAT BATARANG, AND JOKER SHOULDVE STILL DIED SOMETIME AFTER THE DIPLOMAT STUFF ENDED, AND JASON IS RIGHT. i just wanted to add The Other Bullshit happening in tandem to this that UTRH's film and comic didnt mention, bc it is bananas and makes the discussion even more interesting in my opinion

and if you want to see more of this POV, i highly recommend ThePandaRedd (he/they) on tiktok and youtube. his takes inspired me to start reading the original comics to see firsthand that everything was right: Jason was such a happy Robin (minus Felipe), it is weird they retconned him into The Angry Robin, also they are where i first heard of the "tragic cycle where Jason theoretically will always oppose Batman" and the thought-experiment of "Jason would hate Bruce for inducing a war in Jason's name just to kill the Joker just as much as our Jason hates our Batman for NOT killing the Joker", and even pointed out that film-UTRH-Jason's decision to point the gun at Bruce for walking away belies a hidden intent that Jason hadnt been voicing (that Jason didnt want to JUDT get to kill the Joker, but have Bruce participate and approve, you get it). really love that guy, very entertaining, highly recommend ThePandaRedd. they also do skits! very fun

bUT YEAH, AGAIN, JASON WAS STILL RIGHT THO

lmao im so glad you've had a chance to get this out because I just KNOW you do the same thing I do and imagine conversations where you get to explain something because this is same cadence I think in hahaha

however. I fear I just think violence is sometimes the answer and batman was the first example I thought of

[promethes]

tell us about the date!!

girl. genuinely so many things where it was just so clear we are two very different kind of people. for one when he initially asked me out he sent a christmas pop up event that had literally closed weeks prior. I didnt say anything and waited for him to figure out bc i wanted to see if he would and also I had a backup idea planned if it came to that. bc I value ppl who plan ahead of time and look into things like that. he did not realize until 2 hours before the date and switched to an ice skating spot instead. again, it was a place you have to buy tickets online in advance but i didnt say anything bc i dont want to set the expectation that i’ll do that shit for him and wanted to see if he’d check which he didn’t we ended up having to go off to the side to buy the tickets when we got there.

I will say he’s nice enough and polite and drove and paid so that was cool whatever.. but like for example he basically had me being his personal photographer the whole time and had me retake the same video of him skating three times from different angles bc he wanted to post that and that is just not me I hate that shit. when I wasn’t recording him he was recording himself it was ridiculous. also he loved going fast the whole time and it was like more of a circular path than a traditional ice skating rink so I deadass gave up on trying to keep up and went at my own pace that man deadass zoomed off and left me for a good 10 minutes which thank GOD it was the best ten minutes of my life.

he remembered absolutely nothing I said and asked if I had siblings like 3 times and just kept making weird comments that i wasn’t fw at all. and I gave him a lot of grace bc english is his second language but at a certain point weird is weird and also sometimes i told him like you can just say it in spanish i understand and even in his first language it was like ur just…. WEIRD!!!! like at one point he said i look really “innocent” and then he said Im probably a “daddy’s girl” like who tf are you talking to rn.

also he wore a fuck ass jacket and said he didn’t want to wear his beanie even though it was cold bc it made him look “hood”. mind you 1) i am literally from said “hood” chill out 2) 90% of my attraction to him was based on seeing him in his work clothes and in that beanie. the second he was in his preferred normal clothes and fuck ass gelled hair with his fuck ass big ass truck it was like oh yeah we’re two very different people.

idk he was just kind of vain all around and made some weird insinuations and we did not match at all. initially I tried to convince myself it was cultural differences and that I needed to cut him some slack but sometimes u just have different values and perspectives and that’s how it is! im just glad he only kissed me on the cheek at the end of the night omg I was so repulsed when he leaned over. sue me for being normal i guess

worst part is i’m so fun to hang around and a great conversationalist and super accommodating and also he’s vain so he for sure thinks I had a good time bc he had a great time and now i have to figure out how to stop this without making things weird at work and without having any kind of retaliation but whatever worst case i’ll agree to another date and act in a way that makes him hate me so he can cut it off and we’re both happy

[hiemaldesirae]

Swap AU:

Val wasn't too slow, he didn't come at all to Vox's distress call. He thought Vox could handle it. He spends the first 4 years as Alastor's thrall dead, as do most of the soul that Val owns. (Angel included.) Killing Valentino and the souls he owns gets old, however and sinners are getting tired of the same old pornos, so Valentino gets to go back to work, but thanks to their multiple horrible deaths, Valentino and his contracted souls are alot closer. They even have a discord server dedicated to bitching about Alastor. Now that Vox is back, they've added a sever dedicated to getting pictures of Vox for Valentino so they all don't die horrible deaths--and also, Valentino rewards everyone with every new picture with a raise of 50 dollars, so it's nice incentive.

Alastor on the other hand beside killing Valentino and his contracted souls for the first 4 years, made a shrine with Vox's heads--except for the very first one. That one he slept with. That one remain's in his (formerly Vox's) bed everyday, waiting for Alastor's return everynight so he can curl around it and murmur the words he never got to say to his beloved Vox one last time.

When Vox returns, Sir Pentious joins the hotel because Vox has always been his favorite of his favorite of the Vees, and if he's joined another Overlord and started something else, the Sir Pentious will try it out!

Angel Dust is there because he doesn't want to go through the absolute HELL the first 4 years under Alastor was, he wants no repeats. No one Valentino included DOES!

Husker actually loves working with Vox, and loves sending smirks at the very pissed off shadow Alastor (not knowing Alastor is watching from the Shadow's eyes.) and the side hugs, the cuddles, Yeah, they might piss off the Shadow and Alastor even even more but he deserves it--Vox still has nightmares about his near death.

OHH okay okay i see. that clarification. Actually made things 1000x worse for me actually im gonna throw up. this val trusting in voxs abilities to the point where it made him lose one of his best friends for years vs show val jumping to vox the moment that it became clear the other couldnt hold his own..... so sickening what the hell. the guilt that val must feel in specific for voxs disappearance and presumed death- honestly hes probably glad for dying so much those first four years because it took his mind off the fact that it was HIS fault all this happened to vox and him and vel. i just want an oddly tear filled reunion scene with the two vees where vox is like "i thought you guys just didnt think i was important enough to come help" and voxvel start actually bawling bc theyve missed him so much and theyre so glad he's back and *safe*. also the discord server inclusion is hilarious as hell thank you for that mental image nonny

oh my GODD thats actually so sweet im gonna be sick. i just know those former heads are kept clean and swept everyday both by niffty and alastor himself, and the one in his bed is probably propped up by all the most comfortable pillows while alastor himself just goes without a pillow.... WHAT WORDS. what FUCKING words if it was i love you ill actually just implode on the spot nonny ill get raptured and itll be all your fault /lh

+ pentious finally gets an audience with his idol! aww this is so sweet im gonna get cavities. hopefully he doesnt get hit with the kys this time but oh well if he does cause i support my wife committing crimes

Also. Vox having nightmares about the time he nearly died.... do you think that he has like ptsd flashbacks or something everytime he sees a radio. im gonna be SICK fuck oh my god. do tou think ohe day he just . meets al again and immediately tries to run away or something while the other hotel members go to his defense because they know the shit hes been dealing with from al....

p.s. nonny are you planning on turning this into a fic or something anytime soon? because if not.... can i write one based off these ideas 🥹

[seakicker]

Hope everything’s going well in your side of the world, miss Seakicker! This ask is being written either two purposes;

1. Is it too early to ask you to share your thoughts on Love and Deepspace? I play the game myself and I’m curious about your thoughts on it.

2. How is your cat? Has Garf (did I get his name wrong?) done anything of interest recently? - 🦦anon

things have been pretty good!!!! work has kept me VERY busy (i have a 56 hour workweek coming up………. flop) but i have some PTO this week bc im going to a convention 🥹 there’s always something to look forward to even when work is beating my ass LMFAO

i’ve been super into a different game recently (18trip) so i actually haven’t made too much headway into love and deepspace OTL… maybe i’ll grind some tomorrow while my boyfriend’s at DND and i’m home alone doing nothin 🤔 i don’t have a clear grasp on who my favorite is yet but if you guys have any predictions… 👀

and my sweet sweet garfield actually passed away in april— the day after my birthday no less (i wasn’t really active in april so i didn’t post about it or anything) 😢 he would have been 15 this october so he was definitely up there in age; his health had been declining for a few months and it just got to the point where it was cruel to keep him alive so my dad chose to have him medically put down. i miss garf every single day 🌈 thank you for asking about him, im glad he’s remembered so well by so many people. it’s really, really heartwarming to know that he was adored by so many friends and followers and people i know ❤️❤️❤️

[sadgirlautumn]

omg do I have roommate drama for you. I found this roommate online last year and I thought she’d be great because I had horrible roommates previously and I discussed everything I wanted from a new roommate and she seemed perfect like she said all the right things. but she never remembered anything. she took literal months to clean things when it was her turn and like you may be like “why didn’t you speak up” well it’s because she would gaslight and just lie to make me believe she was about to do it. like I have my own life I can’t analyse and keep track of when she actually does something. but she always waited way more than our rule of 3 days to do the dishes and I said in a roomie meeting we need to change the amount of time bc i’m spending all my time reminding her and she said she’ll do better and of course she didn’t 😭 worst is she blamed this all on her adhd and im sorry if you can not clean a living space that you share with 2 other people to the point where everything is VISIBLY dirty you need to either live alone or live in an assisted living facility because that’s disgusting. and she would ALWAYS ignore our critiques but when one of us did something wrong she’d be the FIRST to come to us with it. she also never knew how to put the trash bag in the trash can 😭 we have literally SHOWN her but every time she did the trash she would literally put the bag UNDER the flaps you’re supposed to put the bag on. like I feel bad but she was so fucking stupid 😭😭😭😭 do not understand how she gets herself fed all on her own. oh and speaking of food we did a charlie brown thanksgiving because we were home on thanksgiving and she left the OPEN bag of popcorn on the counter from november until APRIL. I didn’t say anything because I was like surely she’s aware 😭😭😭 she also left a bunch of shit with us when she left and claimed it was “only stuff you guys can use” which included chicken that was expired in september, a box of candy corn that has been on the counter since october, cereal that’s been on the counter since january, and she left her whole fucking mattress in the lobby. so fucking glad she’s gone 😭😭😭

cleanliness is always the number one issue of roommate culture unfortunately. i hate the similarities between trying to find a decent roommate online and dating apps. i get no one wants to admit their flaws but like it would be nice to have a heads up. 🙃

i understand that some people have “different standards of living” and that some people may not know how to clean. i definitely still struggle with things like cleaning and i like to have explicit instructions on how to do things but at least i actually ask people for help/how they prefer to have it done and i don’t just let it sit there until someone else cleans it. 💀 i don’t blame you for letting stuff sit out because that’s the issue with these people. if they know that you’re going to get frustrated and clean it eventually they will just leave it until that happens because it being there doesn’t bother them. also not to compare people with adhd (because everyone deals with it differently) but my sister has adhd and struggles with starting and finishing tasks but even she doesn’t let stuff get that bad. 💀

the charlie brown thanksgiving is such an adorable idea!! im sad your roommate had to ruin it but this next thanksgiving you can at least be grateful that they’re gone 😌

i’ve never had a roommate (it’s inevitable though in this economy) but in 4th grade i had a disgusting lockermate (we weren’t allowed to choose who we shared with my entire time at school) and my lockermate was always leaving food in there to the point it got gross. anyway it’s the last day of the school year and we have to clean out our lockers and she finds a container of grapes in the bottom of the locker and decided to open it and it smelled like wine so teachers would come into the hallway and kept continuously asking what the smell was. it was very embarrassing. 😭 she literally dumped out the grapes and took the container home. i’m sure she was worried about her parents wanting the container back but for how long it was gone and the shape it came back in… i doubt they were missing it.

also my neighbors went through a phase where they kept getting rid of mattresses and would just leave them leaning against their house outside for months until spring clean up (when everyone is allowed to put their junk on the sidewalk and the garbage workers pick it up) and that thing would be a greyish brown and weigh like a 100 pounds by the time the poor garbage workers had to pick it up because you know… it was outside in winter. i have a theory that the one guy who lives there is a chronic bed wetter and that’s why they go through mattresses so fast. he’s also just a bad guy in general but that’s too much to unpack rn.

thank you for sending this definitely satisfied my need for stories like this. and i’m sorry you had to go through that. 😭🫶

[the-kr8tor]

IM SO SORRY FOR NO DAILY HOBIE HC YESTERDAY MY INTERNET CRASHED FOR HOURS- ANYWAYS HERE WE GO Daily Hobie HC! More general Hobie hcs but angsty>:) (I have so much more muaha) - Hates the silent treatment. He would rather try to talk things out rather than be ignored, as it brings him back to when he was a kid. Nobody ever listened to him and often ignored him, being the most 'useless' sibling of nine. Hobie would rather you treat him like absolute shit during a fight than ignore him. Yell, insult, physical pain, was better than the silent treatment for him. - Personally, I think that Hobie had a small lotus tattoo on the back of his left shoulder, a hidden semi-colon in the front petal. Being how his childhood was, and the traumatic imagery of the riots, blood, gore, guts.. It takes a toll, especially during teenage years. Hobie almost even felt disappointed that the radioactive spider didn't kill him. He deserved it after all, didn't he? - Knows all of his siblings birthday by heart. Every time their birthdays roll around, he'll wear/do something that he remembered they liked doing as tribute. Hobie doesn't know how many are alive, or dead, but he hopes they're doing well either way. - Very desensitized to his own sorrow and grief. He grew up too fast, and suppressed it to the point where it takes him a lot to shed tears now or feel grief. It's usually just numbness. Hobie learning to get his inner child back was a slow process for sure. - For a period of time before the Spider Society and everything, Hobie truly believed he was destined to be alone. That everyone leaves in the end, and he was cursed as someone who would live, breathe, and die alone. - On top of that, his nightmares feel like constant taunts, replaying gruesome memories just to poke fun at him. Like he wasn't a good person. Like Hobie deserved to not feel any sort of warmth. That the Earth was cold, heartless and cruel. - As a teenger, Hobie distanced himself from his family as they disappeared one by one to somewhere where he didn't know. He knew where his mother went, and was devastated by her deaf. She didn't have any more love for her children, but she kept a roof over his head and took care of him, even if it was a little bit. - Hobie hates drinking, especially alone. He hates being reminded of his mothers death, like he's slowly following in her footsteps. He'll die in the same, cruel death like she did, found at the end of the glass bottle that's lifted up to his lips, the liquid burning on the way down his throat. -🐦‍⬛

That's alright!! I'm glad you're back!

Daily Hobie HC!!!

Uh oh

Sameee I hate the silent treatment too :'(

NO HE DID NOT DESERVE IT 😤😤☹️

Awww I remember everyone's bday too but not a lot of them remember mine 😞 (now u made me sad 🐦‍⬛ anon ☹️)

*Holds Hobie's hand* Let's heal our inner child together

BROOOO THIS GOT ME ULTRA SAD 😭 Y U HURT ME LOVELY? IS IT BC OF OPIN?!

Nuh uh not on my watch!

[sunsetsover]

ok genuinely my thoughts

charliebabe are SOOOOOO cute but i do fear depending on how they play it the willy stuff could genuinely ruin them for me

i still fucking hate how they're depicting way as some kind of martyr and this great guy who died ESPECIALLY when they SHOW the fact that babe is STILL having nightmares about what way did to him literally in the first scene. like i get babe having conflicted feelings about it but having alan being all 'he loved you more than anyone 🥺' yeah you can choke on that shit honestly

speaking of. chris my ass. that is 1000% way. and pete definitely knows and straight up lied to charlie and babe. bc he's a fucking weirdo who kept way's apartment exactly as it was and tells his picture 'i love you' despite the fact that they barely knew each other. just weird.

(and this is just me spitballing but if he knows its way and still turned him away and said 'send him back i can't work with him' DESPITE being so obsessed w way it's bc he knows way is up to no good. but bc he's so obsessed w way he can't call him out and get him into trouble either. pete could potentially be the one who fucks everything up for everyone.)

im really glad babe pointed out how much what pete and charlie are doing reminds him of his days back in tony's house bc that was genuinely my first thought so i'm glad it was brought up so quickly and addressed it

if they really did bring back dean just to kill him in literally 30 seconds that is UNBELIEVABLY funny and i have nothing but respect for them for that

my northsonic. oh my fucking god my northsonic. we got them for like 2 minutes and it was enough to sustain me for the next 5 years. when sonic walked into that garage north's face lit up like a kid's on christmas morning. when sonic was pointedly saying hello to alan and jeff first north was looking at him like 'oh my god please look at me please pay attention to me' and then sonic did and north could barely look at him or get his words out. when north asked him 'how long are you staying' the way sonic looked at him was an awful lot like he was thinking 'well i guess that depends on you'. they are going to RUIN me. i miss them already.

also i know many people are going to be v upset abt kim leaving x hunter but i literally could not care less if it means i get to see my baby boy north promoted to the big leagues :-(

overall i really enjoyed it and am so glad i have my boys back and i really really wanna see where it all goes and how it all unfolds but im also genuinely scared for what lies for charlie and babe. bc i can forgive a lot in fiction but cheating can ruin a show/pairing for me like nothing else can so. this willy stuff has me nervous. but we shall see!

[brklynvannn]

oh my gosh hi! i’m here! i got sick which is why i wasn’t immediately in your inbox after the last few chapters. i dunno where to start!! my heart was cracked open reading ch10 bc my poor sweet oscar 😭 his pain was so visceral that it made me emotional and i had to tell myself “this is fic!osc, irl he’s FINE” and i knew you wouldn’t leave things like that so i bravely powered through.

and good god. the lando pov. you have no idea how much i was looking forward to it and you fucking delivered!! i had so many notes so many thoughts, first–washing lando’s mouth out with soap after making out with that stranger ✋😩 i jest! i knooow he was going through it so i really don’t hold it against him. screaming crying at “why did i leave” i wanted to reach into my phone to comfort him but i’m so glad he has max. everyone wishes they had a max fewtrell! i’m grabbing lando by the shoulders and shaking him!!! you deserve happiness!!! let yourself have nice things!!!

ik you were unsure about doing his pov but it added so much to the fic. i know their feelings are very mutual but it was reassuring (?) to get his side and see the yearning. the double update was my lil treat for finishing my projects for uni so thank you for your continuous updates. like someone else here said, this is my comfort fic and when i was feeling lousy i would reread old chapters while waiting for new ones :’)

i was so giddy at the developments in the latest ch that i kept putting my phone down to take breaks bc i was feeling the same nerves and excitement as oscar. obviously i don’t know any of the piastris, but i think the way you wrote them was so natural and seemed so realistic. of course oscar is basically a dream boy, growing up surrounded by women 😌 that bit about how they used to vacation there and it felt so different then and now it’s his place that he’s made a home in. yeah. hnsndjdk

my brain is still kinda fried so this debrief doesn’t have much to offer except my gratitude for you and this fic. i’m also eagerly awaiting wag!oscar, which i saw you almost had a (loving) mob with pitchforks begging you for it haha. it’s bc we all see the vision you put in our heads 🫵 gotta take accountability for making these boys too soft, too sweet, too compatible, your oscar w/ wag potential thru the roof, lando too easy to fall in love with!

there’s more i want to say about ch13 but look how long this is 💀 lemme just say THE PHOTOS OH MY GOD lan was always looking he always SAW you oscar. you don’t photograph someone like that unless you’re halfway in love!! anyway. this is a monstrous ask so i understand if you can’t respond to all of it and sorry if it’s overwhelming. i just wanted you to know i’m still ride or die for this story 🫶

MY SWEET DEBRIEF ANON 😭 I missed u.

I hope you’re feeling better omg!!!

Listen I know I have put these sweet lil babies through a lot. Especially Oscar, so it felt only fair we got to see Lando’s (not so healthy) way of coping but I ALSO felt the need to scold him for making out with the stranger (and I fucking wrote it).

Thank you so much. I was SO unsure about Lando’s pov so this means so much!! And you have no clue how much it means that you said you were re-reading chapters I WILL CRY.

Your debriefs always have so much to offer are you kidding omg! Truly these have been one of my fav parts Im so thankful to see you in my inbox ugh.

YES I KNOW It’s my fault for the sweet loving mob for Wag Osc and honestly I totally get it. (It will happen)

You are absolutely not overwhelming and I make it point to respond to every point of every ask because people are taking the time to actually read my fic and it means SO MUCH. Thank you so so so much really.

[gojoest]

ok i am finally home and it’s STORYTIME WITH THE WAITER !! *rubs hands together* long post btw my thoughts are very hectic i am sleep deprived and hungover so excuse me t-t

so last night we went to this place with 2 of my coworkers (that are also close friends of mine) — it’s a club restaurant actually, the music is chill and not so loud until about 10-10:30pm so you can eat and chat with friends and then after that it’s showtime (hot men put on a show, they dance and strip, the latter is not that hardcore btw). turns out they organize different shows every night so it’s not always that. ANYWAY, we had a waitress assigned to our table but the place was so full and she was busy running around catering to everyone so instead of waiting i asked the waiter in question for the menu :3 so he brought us 3 and was like “sorry my coworker is very busy, if she can’t handle all her tables i will gladly take care of you tonight”. guys he is super cute i tell you, he’s got that big smile on his face all the time and a super positive energy flowing from him + he jokes around with ease and just seems to be so easygoing and friendly and i find that so attractive NOT TO MENTION he is very handsome and has a beard!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! sadly though he didn’t end up taking our table bc the waitress made it work somehow, she was super lovely btw <3 he was constantly passing by our table though and we both shamelessly stared at each other every time lmao

anyway as the night went on and we downed 4 bottles of wine and started dancing my mischievous coworkers invited him to our table for a bit and he did not decline even though he was working, he just casually sat down with us and behaved like we’ve always known each other ajksdskas. so we poured him a glass of wine, said cheers and then danced a bit AND THEN t-t my coworker took an empty water bottle and spun it on the floor (do you see where i am going) and it ended up pointing towards me and the waiter t-t and that same coworker was like “you have to kiss her now, these are the rules” and i was like :0 just standing there like :0 what :0 what :0 he then came to me and looked me in the eyes and put his hands on my cheeks but didn’t kiss me immediately, i think he was waiting for my reaction like i’m going give you 3 secs to push me away if you don’t want to but ofc I DID WANT TO KISS HIM so we in fact kissed.

after we were done kissing my coworker literally placed the bottle between us again, didn’t spin it this time just put it there between us like ok round 2 now, keep going KSJHDKSJSAA and he looked at me and was like “how about you kiss me this time” with a smug smile. part of me wanted to slap him but a bigger part of me wanted to keep kissing him so that’s that sigh we kissed again. HE IS SUCH A GOOD KISSER it’s not my fault :/

later we had some time to chat and exchange numbers etc.. and im glad we did bc i wanted to apologize to him for what my friends pulled with that orchestrated spin the bottle. and he was like “i am very content things turned out that way actually and i hope you don’t mind it either, and also — i hope you are single too” <- he looked so cute saying this that i ended up kissing him again help. then we talked some more and kissed some more. around 3:30am we had to leave bc we had work in like a few hours so i called a taxi and he waited with me outside even though he was still at work (i hope he did not get in trouble for that + spending a lot of time with us t-t) and then opened the car door for me and told me to text him when i get home t-t but i forgot bc i was a bit drunk and all i wanted to do was sleep right away so i just passed out. BUT HE CALLED ME and was like you home safe? and i was like yep yepp !! then i saw that he texted me a few times to check on me and maybe got worried that i did not reply so he called t-t

today he kept texting me all day casually updating me on how his day is going + asking questions about my day and etc. he sent me a selfie in the morning and was like “ok since you’re not drunk anymore can you please look at me and confirm that you still like me” LMAO he is so !! doki doki !! makes me laugh a lot but also i want to punch him sometimes bc he’s so smug but then again i can’t bc he’s also very cute and pretty t-t anyway i shall keep you updated on mr waiter v_v WAIT actually he’s also an engineer but works as a waiter too + he’s a foreigner but has been living here for a long time, knows the language fluently and has the cutest tiny accent when saying certain words IT’S SO CUTE anyway i need to take a shower now i am so tired t-t

[the-gayest-show]

you know guys they weren't wrong about the episodes "house's head" and "wilson's heart"

they actually were underestimating how bad it gets. actually

you know. those people. they made a point. they were like "OMG house's head wilson's Heart" and I saw some cool fucking FANART and I'm like "damn what could possibly happen" and then....

spoilers under the cut.

i can't do this. Wilson suffering montage is not what I wanted to keep me up at night. I think amber's ok but her death was so hard on Wilson I sobbed when he did look at this mans GLOWING BROWN EYES AND TELL ME YOU DIDN'T WANT TO HUG HIM AS SOON AS HE BROKE DOWN IN TEARS

dear Tumblr it's 1:30 am in the morning I started a mdnight push thru of this episode i'm not the same man I was 43 minutes ago do you FUCKING hear me

even HOUSE got in tears. and NOW he feels Wilson is gonna blame him and house blames himself and wishes HE died in the fucking bus crash and not the healthy young doctor i'm going to ducking die I'm going insane

like bro. it started off ok with house's head, yeah? I LOVED the direction. it was going great! we had these fun montages of house trying to rejog his memory by almost killing himself and seeing hallucinations everywhere. we had oh so much going on. Wilson isn't too bad in this one. Wilson is fine, house is probably on the verge of killing himself and everyone's like "you know you should stop actually" but he doesn't and then we end off with "you know the 2nd sick patient is AMBER" *credits roll, immediately clicks next episode*

but then it got BAD. wilson's heart got me crying. like ok i'll admit I knew amber was gonna die that was smth I kept in the back of my mind but wilson. he made it happen. ok first off, credits where they're do to the director of both episodes and the actors. Wilson was sobbing so hard I STARTED SOBBING. Robert Sean Leonard you son of bitch when I CATCH YOU RSL I WILL HUG YOU TO OBLIVION

he's not like any other patient's family ever he cries the biggest tears and goes absolutely feral. idk how amber felt towards bro but Wilson is in LOVE with her. it SHOWS. did you see how hard he SOBBED during that episode when they said she was going to die I was crying too

no but then Wilson he uh forces house to rejog his memory one last time and then the WORST MONTAGE EVER STARTS. THEY PLAY THE MOST FITTING EMOTIONAL SONG AND SHOW EVERYONE AFTER AMBER'S DEATH IM SOBBING IM ON THE FLOOR I SAW THE OG 3 REUNITE I WANTED TO THROW MY LAPTOP ACROSS THE ROOM (a feeling that has occurred multiple times in 40 mins)

NONONO BUT THEN. THEN WE GET HOUSE IN THE DREAM/COMA SEQUENCE. HE'S SITTING NEXT TO AMBER (DEAD) AND THEY TLK ABOUT IT.

HOUSE DOESN"T WANT TO GO BACK TO CONSIOUSNESS BC HE'S SCARED WILSON WILL HATE HIM AND HE WONDERS SMTH ABOUT THE DRUG ADDICT (HIM) GETTING TO DIE IN BUS CRASHES WHILE THE YOUNG ONE LIVES BUT IT DIDN'T HAPPEN DIDN'T IT AND THEN BRO'S LIKE RIDDLED WITH GUILT AND THEN SFOUWBFSUBF

END SCENE. WILSON COMES UP TO AN ALMOST AWOKEN HOUSE AND THEN

HE LEAVES. HE GETS OUT OF THE ROOM HE LOOKS AT HOUSE AND HE EXITS THE PREMISES. SOB.

OH MY GOD. IM SO GLAD CUDDY IS THERE AT LEAST BUT OH MY GOD. HOUSE. THIS IS YOUR ONLY FRIEND. YOUR BEST FRIEND. THE FRIEND. SEASON 5...................................

save me season 5 save me or else house writers are catching these hands

[alitgblog]

ok thoughts for volume IV bc I actually enjoyed it a lot lol

also I'm currently on a Jin route (i might switch to claudia i have not decided) so that's important context lol

I Spy was an interesting concept for a game but if i can nitpick here, it felt much more like a firepit game than a challenge and that would be nice to have some variety since last week was the Heartbreaker thing and next week we have Excess Baggage.

For whatever reason I can't remember the format of the show rn but I think if the game is gonna continue with doing about a day more or less per volume, it should be like the show where there is at least one or two major events being either dates (where couples are either all in the same area, one couple goes out of the villa, or there's bombshells involved), challenges (where they go out onto the stage and do some physical challenge), or parties (which can include games). And right now I feel like we're getting three challenges in a row and I'd rather we change it up. But that's besides the point

anyway i believed Jack when he said his secret wasn't supposed to cause drama but I did not believe Theo at all and the fact that we got to tell him that later? Great choice. (and also so in character for MC to tell him off and him to just continue pretending like she didn't say that)

Also very flirty moments with Claudia is what is making this Jin route so hard. she's very forward and the fact that you can pursue her so soon is great actually. I thought maybe she and theo would share a slow burn route but it seems like it might be just Theo (or that you can't officially couple up with her later but apparently you can kiss her and go to the hideaway and stuff so that's cool).

I'm always hoping for non MC centered drama and we got it (but also there WAS MC centered drama too so that's even better)

I love to have a character to hate/dislike, so thank you so much Sophie and Jack. I can't imagine what it would be like with Luna and Jin though because they seem way more chill whereas I can see Sophie (a PERFORMER) doing all that and Jack (self proclaimed romantic) also just doing stuff to fit with Sophie.

And honestly still having residual feelings from the previous episode works. Like, yes to the Jack and Emel kiss (at least from Jack's POV about being insecure about Sophie,,, I'm not so sure about Emel but as someone who played it flirting with Oakley up until the end of Vol II and knowing Emel wants a romantic guy like Jack, I will let it slide). I kinda wish it implied more that Jin rejected Sophie so that's why she didn't pick him at the last recoupling so she's still hurt and still antagonizing MC and Jin for that reason. Otherwise it's just like, why are they still mad though?

Emel and Oakley are so cute. I also kept wishing after S5 and S6 that we got more strong couples in the game and I'm very glad they seem happy and if anything happens to them I'm gonna be so upset.

And tbh Jack and Sophie making it work is so nice too. Even though I think they're gonna keep having a lot of drama, it's entertaining and it's also great to have a couple that's probably gonna get dumped or split up at some point (and you know they're not gonna make it on the outside).

I don't care for Brad and Christy at all but why is that option 29 gems?? Like even asking for drama about the Islanders currently in the Villa is 17 gems (which I still don't think should be behind a pay wall but it feels like that one might be more relevant).

I do like that Jack is trying to be sweet to Sophie because even though he has also been an asshole to MC and her couple, he's still a possible route for if you replay, so that's nice they're not making the other LI's unappealing like in S6 (...yet???? im not giving fusebox the all clear yet)

I hate that Jack called his apology thing a game, I wish he just gathered everyone at the firepit and did the same thing but not called it a compliment game.

in the same vein, why did he invent the chemistry game because that feels like they should've gotten a text about that and then the next text about voting for the couple with the strongest chemistry to go into the hideaway would make more sense.

regardless, I really liked Jack's compliment to MC because that's how I've been playing this character and the fact he pointed it out, I feel like she'd love that. Also everyone else's compliments were fun too except maybe Sophie's which is funny.

And then he tried to make a joke at the end which was bold, but then I found out it might have been Jin's fault which is far more in character but again I don't know how well that would play out if I was playing a different route.

Also you can cheekily ask Oakley how he felt about Jack's joke about Emel being the best kisser in front of everyone and you best believe I did that

Then everything seems fine until the chemistry game and then suddenly Sophie, Jack, Emel, and Oakley are doing fine and everyone else is not and I love that turn in drama. Again, can't speak for a Theo route but the way suddenly Claudia is in between Jin and MC is crazy and Jin has a somewhat reasonable response (considering that fusebox wanted to give you space to go to the hideaway with Claudia). he probably forgave MC too fast imo but that's on me for playing the messy route.

Also Claudia's response after hearing Jin and MC are going to the hideaway together instead of her and MC is so good. Like she does convey she's disappointed but understands, and MC says there's still time for them, and Claudia's response is like it would blow your mind like we gotta give Jin a fighting chance, and I love that. also bc I'm indecisive so I'm glad her routes not closed yet.

as much as I like the drama, Tyler did not make a big splash so it does feel like we just got drama four volumes in a row, so I'm kind of hoping we get a bombshell mid challenge. Unfortunately, it's the excess baggage challenge, which I do like and I think we're due for this challenge to show up, but a bombshell showing up mid excess baggage challenge is literally what happens in S3 so I don't think I'm right.

I already posted my little joke about the Hideaway scene but yeah it's so much better than it's been recently. And like it looks like there's a few more options to change up the scene/dialogue so that's good they put effort into small stuff like that

and I'm not advocating for them hiding scenes behind a pay wall (like I rather them put these expensive gem choices behind drama I don't care about, that's fine) but like if there was ever a time to have a pay to win part of the game I would've made it this and not the kissing challenge. HEAR ME OUT: so it's like an early in the game hideaway first of all, technically you've known each other for like four days and if it comes up again for free, i wouldnt even miss it. Second, it kinda dismisses the drama that JUST happened. Like, either Theo or Claudia have just blown up their strong couple to pursue MC and their LI doesn't do anything? And the other couples vote for them anyway? Like get rid of the gem choice early on for MC and Jin to prove their chemistry and have them stumble anyway. Then after the Claudia/Theo confession, the gem choice is MC announces she wants another shot and because Sophie, Jack, and Emel like her for solving their drama they agree. And then MC can choose her second try with Theo, Claudia, or her LI. And then still has the chat later with her LI and then you win with whoever you pick (or I guess if you pick Theo then you don't bc I guess it's the slow burn route. Maybe you get a chat with him on the daybeds or SOMETHING lol). And third, Jack did this whole campaign to get him and Sophie to a stronger place so like there was a perfect backup couple right there.

and also some non volume specific thoughts:

I'm kind of excited to replay and like couple with Jack or Oakley at this point because I'm curious if the dialogue is much different. I really like Jin's dialogue and it fits his character, so I'm wondering how much of it is copy paste (but most people here are also on a Jin route so I can't cross reference damn).

also I would've reordered the past couple of episodes so that like Luna and Tyler would stay for longer and have a bigger impact but I don't need to make this long post even longer so maybe I'll post it some other time

still don't know why it's called tempting fate but if we're returning to the non themed seasons I'm not complaining

[zee-has-commitment-issues]

helloooo zee my dear and my beloved <3 i was scrolling through old posts and realized i hadn't told you about my Favorite Supervisor in a while!! so here are some updates:

he is in a custody battle with my Current Supervisor over me. that started back in April and has yet to actually be resolved. every time i see him he reassures me that he is TRYING to get me on his line bc i asked him back in April, and then again in like July or August, bc of stuff that had been happening on my line where we weren't getting good hours and then i was homeless (<- meaning i kept being moved between stations and, occasionally, over to another line that im not even trained on)

but it's such a funny situation to me in the end. they are really fighting for me bc Fave Supervisor wants me on his line and Current Supervisor does NOT want to lose me.

ALSO a silly story, but first some context: at work i go by my full birth name. most people end up shortening it to just the front half, which is fine but i never ever got called that as a nickname growing up. so like the only people who call me that are my coworkers. and growing up i DID go by the last half of my name. but only 2 of my coworkers KNOW this; one from Fave Supervisor's line and one from a different line.

anyway i went up to talk to Fave Supervisor the other day, and he greeted me with "HEY [childhood nickname]!!" and i just replied [HEY [supervisor]!!!" and continued the conversation, and it took him pointing it out for me to even REALIZE he had called me something unusual ksdhdskh but he said "cus that's the nickname you prefer, SO I HEARD" and i was just like. ok there is only ONE person who would have told you that and i know who it is but alright. and a different coworker who was standing there was SO confused by him calling me that, cus again NO ONE calls me that at work.

anyway those are my updates for now <3

Hello!!!!!

Updates!!!! I’m glad it’s a good custody battle and not a bad one lol. Sorry you were briefly work homeless.

And work nicknames are wild. I don’t think anyone has a normal work nickname experience. Everyone has a story lol.