#but if women were respected and taken seriously in the first place I wouldn’t experience this so negatively
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321sluggie · 7 months ago
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Hey, considering the majority of people use “transandrophobia” to mean either 1) any transphobia specifically against transmascs or 2) the intersection of transphobia and misogyny that affects transmascs, I would really reconsider your thoughts on it in light of your sexism/pedophilia post
Ok
#coming back to add a thought to this—I get what you’re saying. And transmascs do experience unique forms of discrimination#but in terms of actionable change—of making the world better for transmasc people—I don’t see the labelling of transandrophobia as useful#medical professionals + employers shouldn’t be sexist. it bothers me that I’m seen as a woman but I can’t change how people read me#but if women were respected and taken seriously in the first place I wouldn’t experience this so negatively#you get what I’m saying? it’s so much more useful for me and everyone else to combat the sexism.#if I combat transandrophobia it wouldn’t make it better for the women who experience the same bullshit#it would just be trying to move myself into existing structures of male privilege#similarly—passing well enough to be called slurs has much more to do with homophobia directed at queer men than being perceived as trans#in a less homophobic world cis men wouldn’t have to go through that either#I don’t want to discourage you from using terms that help you understand your experience#but I personally see combatting sexism as the much more actionable form of activism#also. and this is more mean spirited of me to say#that post isn’t a post about transmascs in general…it’s not a ‘sexism/pedophilia post’#it’s an experience post. a personal one#I wonder a little bit about your motives when your inclination is to see a personal post and focus more on a wording in a tag#than the substance of the post itself#if you’re thinking about transandrophobia and what transmascs face day to day why not prioritize. like. care#for the person#rather than the vocab you disagree with#like do you care about other people’s well-being or do you care about being right
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caatws · 1 year ago
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As a Natasha and Gamora fan I find it interesting that both women were firsts in many ways, had their lives ended using Vormir and as a result of their deaths they both ended up with less focus in their final team films. Also It's interesting that in both cases a male character, Tony and Yondu, ended up with funerals while they didn't. Natasha ended up with the better end of the deal than Gamora did, which is another layer of issues with representation, but in the ways things for them are similar I think it brings up how women's stories aren't centered in the same way men's are and that's a symptom of how women's lives aren't valued in the way men's are. It's not just the mcu either. There are more stories centered around men and we see the same types of stories over and over often be lauded as fresh and unique when really it's nothing new. We also have more instances of men getting to play roles well into old age and be seen as worth investing in. I have also noticed that when women speak up about wanting something to be changed about a role they play or wanting more they are seen as being greedy or whiny. When men have similar issues there's more support. I'm glad things are changing but it's still something I believe is worth noting when I think about how it was only 5/4 years ago that both Gamora and Natasha were killed off in a concept that didn't exist before IW and has had no further meaning for them or the mcu. It was ultimately just a place to die.
I am glad Natasha eventually got a solo movie but it's sad it took so long and it was after she died instead of adding to her story beforehand. I'm glad Gamora was in vol 3, but the fact that they brought her back in a way where all of the life she had that wasn't attached to being abused by Thanos no longer existed for her, is unsettling
With Gamora it's also interesting to see how while Natasha's death was taken seriously, hers has been uneven. Following Endgame, where we got to explore it with Nebula, it's Peter devastated and the writing around the rest of her family is almost like a running gag of we don't know what happened, who knows what happened. Which isn't funny. We know what took place so why not be serious about it and show more respect. It was sad to see Rocket's abuse and near death written as if it was a bad thing while Gamora's abuse and murder was written as if it didn't really happen. Same for 2014 Gamora being in the future. It's treated as if that wasn't a hard and emotional experience for her though Endgame showed there was so much going on that would need to be worked through.
It's frustrating that there has been no transparency about what dying on Vormir means for Natasha and Gamora potentially having an afterlife. Are their souls stuck on Vormir would be nice to know. Does Thanos trying to destroy the stones mean anything for Gamora's soul is another important factor. This lack of transparency has disappointingly followed Gamora. Gunn doesn't make much of anything clear about Gamora's post Endgame life or purpose. Why she end up with the ravagers and was she ever curious about the guardians at some point are never talked about. Was there something for her to gain by taking part in this last journey with the guardians separate from her interactions with Peter is another important part not elaborated on. These are some things I think could be beneficial for fans to know. Especially in light of a number of people wanting to dismiss her after vol 3. I'm curious if Gunn is at all aware that Gamora has represented something and that her death wasn't a non issue.
At this point I just think gunn doesn’t even really care abt the gamora thing. Not necessarily in an intentional or even malicious way, but I wouldn’t be surprised if this whole thing is just way more unserious for him, and like he thinks those of us with these issues are just taking it too seriously or are way too focused on just one thing. I mean, that’s just the vibe I get from him lol which is just kind of annoying
The blatant sexism throughout the infinity saga could not have been made more apparent in infinity war and endgame. Like after nat and gamora’s deaths, we got the All Female Team-Up Scene that did feel forced bc literally hardly any of those characters have gotten to interact before, meanwhile we just spent 5 hours watching male characters from different franchises get to interact and develop relationships etc. And just…how are you gonna finally have le epic girl power scene after 10 years but not even have either original female lead (not counting 2014!gamora bc she Is Not The Original Female Lead of gotg bc she is a Separate Character) in it 🫨
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bbrandy2002 · 4 years ago
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Fearless
Chapter 4: See the Lights, See the Party, the Ball Gowns
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Book: The Royal Romance/The Royal Heir
Pairing: Prince/King Liam x MC (Riley Brooks), Drake Walker x OC (Alyssa Devereaux)
Series Premise: Riley Brooks and Alyssa Devereaux became best friends as freshmen at Syracuse University, a borderline-sisterhood that lasts forever after. When Riley meets a handsome prince and is asked to compete for his hand in a mysterious faraway kingdom, she invites Alyssa along for moral support.
What the girls think will be a crazy temporary adventure becomes two sets of happily ever afters … with twice the shenanigans to show for it.
A/N: This series is written in loving collaboration between @bbrandy2002 and @burnsoslow​.
Series Warnings: Smut 🍋🍋, language, canon violence (gun violence, bombing, terrorism), drug use, probably more stuff as we think of it. By reading this series, you agree that you are at least 18 years old and are prepared to deal with adult themes.
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The girls spent their first morning in Cordonia with their respective sponsors, getting the first glimpses of courtly life and preparing for the Masquerade Ball taking place that evening. As much as they wanted to get out and experience all that this little Mediterranean country had to offer, there was just so much to do and little time to do it. 
That morning, while Alyssa worked diligently on learning the steps of the Cordonian Waltz and etiquette with Rashad, Maxwell finally got Riley out of bed in time for a late breakfast. This included meeting his brother, Bertrand, who was none too thrilled with the former waitress from New York. Riley discovered rather quickly that the duke was nothing like the free-spirited Maxwell; if ever there was a picture display of a killjoy, she was sure his scowling face would be plastered dead in the center.  
The day kind of went by in a dizzying blur, especially for Riley, who spent most of it either being lectured by Bertrand, or raiding the kitchen for stress snacks with Maxwell. And as far as anyone knew, Liam was still unaware that the quirky, raven-haired beauty he’d met two nights ago and never expected to see again was in his country, in his palace, and was about to come face-to-face with him.
If she didn’t die of anxiety first. 
Neither of the girls saw each other until much later that afternoon when they linked up in Riley’s room before heading to the palace's salon for last-minute hair and nail appointments. 
Later on in the boutique, Riley sucked in a deep breath and held in her stomach while Alyssa stood behind her, fighting to zip the back of the angel-themed costume she chose for the Masquerade Ball. 
Actually, "chose" was a loose description in this case. The ensemble was one of the last two dresses in the palace's boutique, and Maxwell insisted Riley wear it instead of the more provocative red devil attire to make herself more appealing to the King and Queen. The Beaumont sponsee didn’t give two shits at that moment about impressing the monarchs; her major concern was how she would fit that size-four dress over her size-six body. 
“What the hell did you eat, Ri? This zipper is not budging an inch," an out-of-breath Alyssa groaned as she attempted to pull the tight fabric closer together.  
Steadying her feet firmly to the ground, a jostled-around Riley answered quietly, in a still manner, so as not to undo what little progress her friend had already made, "You know I'm a stress eater. I've experienced many emotions since we left yesterday, and food therapy helps. And your judgment is making me hungry again, so thank you for making it worse."
"I'm not judging you; I'm simply stating a fact: Your ass won’t fit in this dress."
Riley straightened up a little higher, hoping to thin her lean frame out more. "Well, it's gonna have to," she scoffed. "I can't be the only suitor at this ball without the proper attire."
Alyssa tugged harder in frustration. "You know, it might help if I could remove the price tag from the zipper."
"Perhaps." Riley sideways glanced at the two inattentive boutique cashiers before turning her head slightly over her shoulder to acknowledge her best friend in a hushed tone. "But then I wouldn't be able to return it in the morning. $700 for a damn dress is highway robbery, and I won't be a victim to this place's jacked-up prices." She glared back at the fashionably dressed women running the register and hollered out, "You should all be ashamed of yourselves!"
"Shhhh!" Alyssa's face burned with embarrassment while she smiled sheepishly at the bewildered ladies. "Are you crazy? What the hell is wrong with you?"
"You mean aside from the usual things that are wrong with me? I'm a nervous wreck, Lyss. Liam still doesn't know that I'm here. I'm about to go wine-and-dine with snobby rich people, while my socially awkward-o-meter is on red alert. And Maxwell's brother didn't like me. How am I supposed to impress Liam, the press, this council, and his parents when my own sponsor hates me?"
"He doesn't hate you," Alyssa replied. "Suck in your stomach a little more ... Rashad told me Duke Beaumont is high-strung and takes all this court business very seriously. If you ask me, give ‘The Brows’ some time. I know he'll love you. And Liam already does!" Alyssa stepped back in delight after tirelessly sliding the last bit of the zipper to the neckline. "Voila! I got it."
Riley stiffly turned toward the full-length mirror -- her insides feeling like they would pop right out of her -- and surveyed the finished product. "Not bad, not bad. A slight muffin top on the sides, and my ass cheeks are packed in tighter than my family around the dessert station at a buffet, but ... I think I can get by with it." Turning to face Alyssa, she lit up with anticipation. "Okay, now it's your turn."
Alyssa plucked the bright red dress off the rack and headed inside one of the many dressing rooms. A moment later, she emerged with a beaming smile on her face and held her arms out to the side to do a show-offish twirl. "So, how do I look?"
"Oh my god, Lyss!" Riley clapped excitedly. "You look so hot in that! That color of red really suits you too. Although, you might want to cover up the girls a little more; I've never seen your boobs look so huge."
"Wha --" Alyssa glanced down at her fully rounded chest, a substantial portion of which was spilling out over the top. She crossed her arms over her breasts in horror. "OH MY GOD! You're right: They're enormous in this thing. I can't go out there like this! They'll be stuffing dollar bills into my cleavage and begging for a lap dance!"
"Well, just ... try to tuck them in," Riley suggested, demonstrating her advice on herself. “You know, the way guys tuck in their junk.”
Alyssa shook her head adamantly, attempting to slide the top of the dress up higher. "I don't think that'll work. It's already extremely tight."
“That’s what he said,” Riley quipped with a snicker, much to the chagrin of her longtime friend, who simply blinked back. “Wow, not even a smile. Come on, Lyss, it’s not that hard.”
Alyssa grinned despite herself, “That’s what she said.”
Riley stepped closer, reaching out to grab a portion of the garment covering Alyssa's bosom, and declared, "Alright, If I can squeeze my fat ass into this dress, you can cram those giant melons into yours. So, get to pushin’, girl.”
-----------
After 10 minutes of stuffing uncooperative breasts into a gown, Alyssa and Riley stepped out of the boutique and made their way to the bottom of the main staircase outside of the ballroom, where Rashad and Maxwell were waiting eagerly for them. 
A grim-faced Rashad approached the pair as they neared. “We were beginning to worry about you two. I hope you didn’t have any trouble.” He reached out and greeted Alyssa with a friendly kiss to the cheek as Riley made her way up to Maxwell, who did the same.
“No troubles,” Alyssa assured him, before staring down at her chest to make sure certain parts were still contained inside her dress. “Just some slight wardrobe issues that I think we’ve taken care of.”
Riley frowned, rubbing a soothing hand over her squeezed-in stomach. “Let’s just say we both feel like canned biscuits.”
“And I’m petrified of canned biscuits!” Alyssa shrieked, then spoke in a lower, punier voice in Rashad’s direction. “They make that popping sound that scares the hell out of me.” He nodded sympathetically at her admission, having no clue what canned biscuits were.
Maxwell let out a chuckle. “Either way, you both look awesome! Like two totally righteous peas in a pod and all that jazz.” He peeked over at Riley, who wasn’t appearing too sure of herself, or of anything for that matter, knowing she’d spent most of the day in a subtle panic. While she steadied her breath, he looped his arm through hers and leaned over. “Hey, it’s going to be okay. You’re going to go in there like the boss you are and knock them all dead. I just know it.”
Riley swallowed thickly, “But Liam --”
“Will be over the moon with excitement to see you again. Do you think I’d go through all the trouble of trying to convince you, and then Alyssa, to come all the way here -- not to mention, facing my brother’s wrath -- if I didn’t believe Liam would want to see you again?” Riley half-shrugged, but Maxwell could tell by the little glimmer of hope he caught in her eyes and the slight curl at the corner of her plush pink lips that she knew it was true. “If he’s not happy about seeing you, I’ll book you on the first flight back to New York, and you can punch me in the gut or something. But I can tell you with certainty: No man goes out with a woman and keeps his friends up most of the night talking about how amazing she was if he doesn’t want to see her again.”
Riley could feel a tinge of pink color her cheeks and looked away for a brief moment, knowing he was right. She was about to see her prince again. Simply knowing how happy Liam was when they parted ways that night made her heart flutter. The blushing suitor peered back at the towering man on her arm and smiled appreciatively. “Thanks, Max.” 
As they both stared straight ahead at the set of double doors where Alyssa was making her grand entrance into the ballroom with Rashad, Riley pointed out, “You realize if you had said all that stuff to me this morning and five bloated pounds ago, I wouldn’t have cried to you all day over pints of ice cream, half a sheet cake, and a bag of Mini Snickers?”
Lord Beaumont grinned without looking at her as the orchestral music inside erupted through the newly opened threshold that awaited their crossing. A gleam of anticipation glistened the cobalt hue of his eyes.”That’s our cue. Time to look alive, Twinkle Toes, it’s showtime.”
__________
It felt like a million pairs of eyes bore through Riley when the announcer spoke her name out to the guest in the ballroom. In reality, few paid much attention to the young woman dressed in pure white, from the feathery halo perched above her fancy swept-up hairdo to the tiny heels that sparkled like glittery specks of fairy dust on her feet.  
As Maxwell ushered her proudly through the spectacular crowd adorned in the finest silks and chiffons, faces concealed behind extravagant masks similar to hers, and opulent table spreads of gold and crimson, Riley searched the four corners of the room for one particular set of the bluest eyes she’d ever encountered -- she had Liam’s memorized by heart. However, the only ones she recognized came from her smiling best friend, standing casually beside the Lord of Domvallier at the bar, keeping her word to watch out for her. With a subtle grin from Alyssa to convey she had her back, the whirlwind of fear and chaotic thoughts that overwhelmed Riley quickly dissipated into thin air. 
Baby steps.
While Maxwell and Riley headed to the center of the ballroom to meet up with Bertrand, across the way, Alyssa ordered a cranberry vodka from the bar. She was wearing red and needed a drink that matched perfectly with the fabric in case of accidental spillage. As the bartender poured her glass, she tore her vigilant gaze from Riley when Rashad’s cell rang. Seconds later, he covered his phone lightly with a palm and lowered it away from his ear to speak with her. 
“This is my client in California. Will you be okay for a little bit while I take this out on the balcony?”
Alyssa nodded. “Of course. Take your time. Is there anything I should be doing while you’re gone?”
“Try mingling with the crowd. Get to know the other suitors. The best way to help Riley tonight is to get a feel for the competition. Figure out who you can potentially get on her side and who is going to cause her trouble.”
“With all due respect, this isn’t Survivor.”
Rashad grinned before excusing himself. “We'll see if you still feel that way by the end of the social season.”
What is it with all the Debbie Downers here? He sounds just like -- Before she could finish that thought, a stroke of irony occurred when she caught the denim-clad Drake, standing out like a sore thumb, making his way up to the bar. She quickly spun around on the barstool and hovered over her freshly poured beverage. 
Tapping the bar's woodgrain top, Drake called for, “The usual,” before plopping down on the stool next to her. His woodsy scent filled the air and wafted in her direction; she wondered if he’d even recognize her.
Pressing the rim of the glass to her lips to take the first nervous sip of her drink, she wondered why she even cared if he did.
Alyssa set the vodka cranberry down on a cocktail napkin at the same time Drake reached for his tumbler of whiskey. A brush of their hands caused them both to retreat away before he bowed his head respectfully to her. 
“I’m sorry, my lady.” Drake was quick to apologize. He never knew which stuck up nobles would have an issue with a commoner’s simple touch.
Alyssa lifted a brow and smirked in response. “So you do have manners?”
He’d recognize that wily voice anywhere. Grumbling, Drake responded. “Aww, hell! Pipsqueak? Is that you?”
“Hello, Sunshine.” She dimpled.
Drake shook his head. “I should have known. Of all the damn people in this room, I still managed to find you.”
“I would call that a very lucky day for you then.” Alyssa lifted her drink and tipped back a gulp. “So what’re you doing here? Don’t you have some royal cows or chickens to herd around or something? Who wears denim and jeans to a fancy ball?” 
She would if she could get away with it.
His tight shoulder muscles bounced slightly with disingenuous laughter as his chestnut eyes took in her sultry devilish costume. “I could ask you the same about your own clothes. Suitors are supposed to dress up for these things. Not come as themselves.”
Offended, Alyssa arched back contemptuously. “Are you calling me a devil?”
“If the horns and pitchfork fit.” Drake retorted. He motioned with his glass across the room. “By the way, you see that blazing redhead who just stole your little friend away from Maxwell?” When Alyssa snapped her gaze protectively in that direction, he continued, “That’s Olivia. You might want to check in on … what’s her name again?”
“Riley ...” Her tone was resentful. He knows damn well what her name is. 
“Whatever. Just trust me on this, if the two of you know what’s good for ya -- and I’m betting you don’t -- you’ll stay as far away from Olivia and the rest of these social-climbing fuckers as possible.” His mood suddenly shifted as he drained his drink, then slammed it on the bar top, motioning with his hand to the bartender for another.
Alyssa was quick to notice the tension in his jaw and the immense throb of protruding veins in his forearm as he nursed his drink. “What climbed up your ass and died? Why are you even here if you hate everyone so much? 
He quickly snapped. “I’m here for Liam!”
“Well, I’m here for Riley!” The two of them glared at each other in a tense showdown that neither was willing to back down from. After a beat, Alyssa’s determination weakened somewhat; confrontations made her jittery. 
And with him in particular.
Letting her shoulders slump, Alyssa let out a soft breath as she relaxed. “I’m trying to give her some space … but do I need to go check on Riley?” The question was asked sincerely. 
Drake turned his head back, his vision crossing the vast expanse of the room and landing on a perturbed Riley in conversation with Olivia. He scowled, recognizing the expression impressed on her face all too well. “We’re outsiders, Alyssa. You. Me. Riley. That’s the only thing they’ll ever see. It’s the only way they’ll ever treat us.” He shifted to face Alyssa again. “Take that for what you will. If she were my friend … I would.”
_______
Riley shook her head emphatically. “There’s no way I’m supposed to kiss the king’s shoe. That’s weird, creepy, and-and- unsanitary!” She nodded toward a masked couple standing before the seated king who bowed, curtsied, and then exited to the left. “They didn’t kiss his shoe. I think you’re full of shit.” 
“Riley, Riley, Riley.” The duchess shook her head with an exasperated tone. “Those people are well-established and highly-regarded members of the court … you’re not. And while I admit it’s a rather unorthodox Cordonian royal custom, it’s part of our tradition that the newest members humble themselves before the king in an act of deep respect and reverence. I’m actually astounded Maxwell never bothered to tell you.” She flipped back a thick curly-q strand of hair that hung over her shoulders. “Do what you want. But don’t say I didn’t try to help you.”
Riley hesitated. “I guess I’ll keep it in mind …?”
“Great!” Olivia wrapped a firm hand around Riley’s wrist and pulled her toward the throne where the king sat. “You’re so lucky that I was here to warn you! Otherwise, you’d have looked utterly ridiculous.”
“Wait! Where are we going? Riley demanded, her feet barely able to keep up with the brisk pace. 
“To present you to King Constantine.”
“But I need to wait for my sponsor!” Riley protested. She struggled to break free, but the redhead’s clawlike grip was surprisingly strong. 
“Every second counts, Riley. These women have all known Liam for years. The early bird gets the Crown.”
“But I --” Panicked, Riley scoured the room for the Beaumonts and found them standing near the hors d'oeuvres table embroiled in what appeared to be a heated discussion.
“What the fuck?” On the opposite side of the ballroom, Alyssa spotted Olivia hauling Riley across the floor. Before Drake had the chance to warn her this wasn’t good, an enraged Alyssa was already sliding down off the barstool, stampeding off in hot pursuit of finding out what this redheaded troll was doing with her best friend. 
And for reasons he couldn’t fully understand, feeling frustrated beyond comprehension, Drake followed right on her heels.
Coming to a screeching halt before the raised dais, Olivia thrust Riley forward, who nearly tripped from the momentum into the bottom step at the sudden stop.
It took every ounce of restraint Riley had not to turn toward the woman who had forcibly dragged her across the room and to stick a pair of size-seven heels straight up her ass. She, however, liked the pretty, sparkly shoes she had on too much to ruin them … and wanted to end the evening outside of a hospital bed. “Asshole,” she muttered almost soundlessly.
“Your Majesty,” Olivia smirked. “I would like to present to you the suitor House Beaumont has chosen. Lady Riley.”
Riley gave her a cursory glare. It was the moment of truth. She plastered on her best smile for the King, who regarded her with a nod. 
Just … just do it. “Your Majesty.” Riley dipped into a low curtsy and held it in place for several seconds before contemplating the validity of Olivia’s outlandish claim and swallowing hard. “Here goes nothing.”
Placing both palms on the plush red carpeting that laid at the feet of the King, she lowered herself slowly until her knees rested on the top step.
“What the hell is she doing?” Alyssa questioned as she desperately weaved around a sea of faces, dodging server trays and tables along the way. “And where the hell is Maxwell?”
“I don’t know ...” Drake answered, practically pushing her even more quickly through the crowd, “ … but you better move faster. There’s no damn telling what Olivia told her to do.”
Riley paused briefly, staring at the simple black shoes that almost resembled a shiny boot. She wanted to be kissing Liam right now, not his father’s old fricking foot. Worst vacation ever.
Lowering her head gradually toward Constantine’s shoes, she scrunched up her face and reluctantly puckered up. 
Out of nowhere, a body with the vigor of a wild stallion in full sprint barrelled into her side, sending Riley hurling across the dais and causing her to land face-down on the marbled floor below.
"What is the meaning of this?" An enraged Constantine bolted up, his ire focused on Alyssa, hunkered down on all fours at his feet, striving to catch her breath.
Maxwell and Bertrand heard the commotion and came rushing to Riley’s side when they realized it was her sprawled out and jerking on the floor.  
"I'm so sorry, Your Majesty," an apologetic Alyssa said as she reached up for the hand Drake was offering. The King's glare at her was nerve-wracking as he waited for an explanation -- until Drake stepped up in front of her, blocking her view of the incensed monarch. "I can explain."
"I hope you can, young lady." Constantine glowered, baffled as to why Drake Walker was still standing between them … and mirroring every movement she made. When she shifted, he shifted. When she moved her arm, he did the same. Was this some type of game?
“Uh … um.” Alyssa's mind raced with excuses. She couldn't very well tell him the truth and make Riley or herself look bad -- she was still a representative of Duchy Domvallier. There was only one thing she could think of to say as she whipped around Drake and pointed at him. "This man pushed me!"
Drake's body stiffened at her accusation. "The hell you talking about?" 
She covered her eyes with a hand, pretending to sob. "I was on my way up here to pay my respects to you, sir, when this man ..." she paused to take in a fake stuttering breath, "... came out of nowhere and pushed me from behind. I tried to stop myself from running into anyone, but I couldn't. Too much momentum." Alyssa lowered her hand and stared at a wide-eyed Drake. "I’m just a small person, mister. Why would you do that? Why? What did I ever do to hurt you?"
"I never --"
"Drake?" The King eyed him sternly. "Is this true? Did you push this young woman?"
Drake’s defensive stance was no match for Alyssa’s pleading eyes, begging him to save her from this. “Please,” she mouthed.
He groaned, rolling his eyes. “I … I’m sorry, Sir. Lady Alyssa’s extremely long dress was dragging the floor and I stepped on it. When I lifted my foot off, she ... I don’t know … flung forward. I tried to grab her before she went flying, but she got away, and that must be why she thought I pushed her.” Drake lowered his gaze to Alyssa. “You really shouldn’t shop in the adult section, miss.”
“Is it possible you were mistaken, Lady ... Alyssa?”
She nodded. “Yes, that is surely possible,” she agreed in a rehearsed-sounding tone. “It’s all coming back to me now.”
“Well, then.” Constantine's contented glance drifted to Drake. “It’s good to know you didn’t push an innocent suitor on purpose, Drake. But just know this … I’ll be watching you.” 
“Looking forward to it, sir. Thank you, sir.” Drake quickly bowed his head as Constantine returned to his seat to greet the next guest. He grabbed Alyssa’s elbow and rushed her off to the side of the dais.
-----------
Maxwell knelt beside a disheveled Riley, helping her rise to her feet and dusting her off. 
“Lady Riley,” a scowling Bertrand glared, “what on earth is the meaning of this? The glory of House Beaumont is on the line tonight, and you’ve already made your first blunder. I told you, Maxwell, this was a mistake.”
Slightly dazed, Riley stumbled while massaging a sore wrist. Inclining her head so she could see him under the halo that drooped over her eyes, she retorted, “I was shoved, Berturd. It’s not like I did this on purpose. And thank you for your concern; I’m fine, by the way.”
“Shoved? By whom?” The three of them turned to see Alyssa and Drake scampering off to a corner. “It was Domvallier’s suitor?” Bertrand asked incredulously. “This is preposterous! It’s beneath Lord Rashad’s character to have his suitor and Drake Walker sabotage ours. I will have to go over there and put an end to this travesty at once.” 
“NO!” Riley and Maxwell barked.
"Bertrand. Why don't you let Riley and I handle them while you play damage control with the King? Unless ..." he smirked. " You want me to smooth things over with His Majesty? I have a lot to say about how Twinkle Toes just SAILED through the air at warp speed --"
"Dear God, no, Maxwell! There will be no need for your … input. But, you two, get results from Drake and that suitor. No funny business," he warned.
The two of them nodded in understanding. As soon as Bertrand turned his back and marched away, they both gave a knowing glance to the other before rushing over to Drake and Alyssa, who had just made it to a far corner of the ballroom, 
Alyssa yanked her elbow away from his vice-like grasp. “I believe we’re out of the clear; you can let go of me now.”
“Listen. I have to tell you something, ‘cause you need to know it ... “ Drake swallowed thickly, his rounded eyes focused squarely on the woman who’d just thrown him under the bus to King Constantine. He spoke as if he had something caught in his throat, “You--your-- uh -- ”
“And who made these damn shoes, anyway?” Alyssa complained as she hiked up the lower part of her dress and stepped out of her heels. Her already short stature lowered several inches. “They clearly hate short women and feet. Seriously, who thought walking around like a newborn calf was sexy?”
“Alyssa,” Drake tried again to speak through a strained voice, “You need to listen --”
“Hey!” Riley interrupted as she and Maxwell stepped up to them. “Why’d you push me off that stage thingy? And OH MY GOD, ALYSSA! YOUR --” Maxwell slapped a hand over Riley’s mouth, knowing exactly what her big mouth was getting ready to loudly announce.
Her frantic muffled words continued to blabber through his tightly clasped hand.
Alyssa gave him a confused look. “Maxwell, what are you doing?”
“Just stopping her before she told everyone within earshot ...” he paused fleetingly, lowering his gaze from the muddled expression on her face to her chest. “Your bosoms … well, they have emerged.”
“That’s what I was trying to tell you before,” a flustered Drake said as Alyssa let out a gasp and looked down. “You’ve been ... exposed … since --” He was quickly cut off again by her tiny wail as she fixed herself and dashed out of the ballroom, mortified, her arms crossed over her chest.
--------------------
Riley tapped lightly on the women’s restroom door. “Lyss? You okay in there?”
“No!” Her pouty voice rang back. “I’m the laughingstock of this entire court.”
Maxwell chuckled, hollering back. “You don’t have to worry about that, Lady Alyssa. I’ve already got that title covered in spades.”
“You two need to get back to the ball,” Drake said gruffly, referring to the girls. “Liam will be arriving any minute.”
“You’re right. There are probably five people in there who still haven’t gotten an up close shot of my breasts.” Alyssa swung the door open, bitterly hitching up the front of her dress as she stepped out, and glared up at Drake as she walked by. “And you let me walk around like that!”
“I did not!” He flushed a deep, dark red. “I told you, that’s why I was standing in front of you, so no one would see … ugh, fuck it. Just -- let’s go, okay?” 
A remorseful Riley hugged Alyssa. “I’m so sorry my dumb ass was what caused this to happen to you. Thank you for making sure I didn’t make a fool of myself.”
Alyssa squeezed tighter. “It was way better that it happened to me than you. We can definitely have a good laugh over this by the time I’m, like, 150.” When they let go of one another, she smiled at her friend. “Come on, we have a ball to get back to. And you have a prince to dazzle.”
“Oh, you guys go on ahead. I need a minute to straighten up.”
Drake, Alyssa, and Maxwell headed back inside while Riley spent a few minutes in the bathroom wiping away the dust off her dress and getting her hair back in order as best as she could. Plus, she just needed a moment to herself; it was the first time since she woke up that morning that someone wasn’t hovering over her shoulder or trying to impress someone. There also were some major jitters happening knowing the Prince was arriving at any second.
Stepping out a few minutes later, Riley headed back down the hallway, hopeful she still appeared as presentable as when she arrived earlier. 
Dotted along the walls that trailed back to the ballroom were portraits and artwork of kings and queens. Judging by the large periwigs, justaucorps, and stockings over breeches depicted, obviously they were quite old. One particular painting caught her attention enough to halt her steps before she plastered on a naughty grin.
“Ohhhh, what do we have here?” Riley snickered, leaning in closer to get a better glimpse. “I see London, I see France, I see a very hung King without his pants.” She fanned a hand in front of her face and spoke as if she were Scarlett O’Hara herself. “My, my, my, Fabian, I haven’t seen a lot of those, but I do declare, you put all the Yanks I’ve been with to shame. I’d be remiss to not ask if you were generous enough to pass on certain sizable traits, say to … Oh, I don’t know, the current Crown Prince?”
“Frankly, my dear … I don’t think he gave a damn,” a deep voice quipped over her shoulder.
Riley spun around, her body crashing into the portrait and causing it to rattle against the wall and lean heavily. Her face burned red-hot as soon as she heard his voice, even though every ounce of blood in her body seemed to rush to her wobbly feet. Liam reached out, grasping hold of her arms to brace her as she stared back, slack-jawed and weak-kneed, at his half-masked face, smiling warmly. “L-L-Li --”
“My sincerest apologies if I startled you, my lady. Are you okay?”
Her throat was dry, and surely no one in all history had ever been as embarrassed as she was at that moment, but she managed to answer feebly, “I think … I pissed my pants.” They both looked down at the floor simultaneously, relief washing over them that there were no puddles. Riley closed her eyes and let out a heavy breath. “Oh, thank God.”
Liam chuckled, his twinkling blue eyes glued to her flustered face. “You’re just as beautiful as you were that night in New York, Riley Brooks.”
“Wait … you know that it’s me? Are you surprised? Are you upset? Do you think I’m some creepy stalker now? I swear I’ve never even touched a weapon.”
“Really? What happened to your bag of Chinese throwing stars?” Liam teased lightheartedly. Riley tilted her head in confusion. “You remember, the ones you were going to throw at me in the alley outside of your bar --”
“Oh. Yes. Right,” she laughed awkwardly as the memory came to her. “Yeah, I may have embellished the truth there a bit. Twenty-pound hams seem to be more my weapon of choice.” Riley hung her head. Why the hell did I just tell him that? When Bastien cleared his throat and gave Liam a pointed look, Riley knew their time was short. “I know you have to go, but I just need to know something: How did you know I was here? Maxwell tried to get in touch with you and never heard back. I didn’t want you to be disappointed in me showing up here.”
“I’ve been quite busy since leaving New York with preparations for the social season and the Masquerade kicking off this evening. But it was Drake who came pounding on my door this morning to fill me in. You can imagine my surprise when he told me that you were here, and, I quote, ‘brought her small aggressive friend with her as guard dog.’”
Riley smirked with a shrug. “Can ya blame a girl? I came to win. Besides, I really like you, Liam.”
He smiled. “I really like you too, Riley. But this isn’t New York. As much as I wish we could just pick up where we left off two nights ago, this entire series of events is set up not just to give me time with my potential matches, but also to give my parents, the Council, and the people of Cordonia time to get to know the future queen. From now on, everyone will be watching you and ... Lady Alyssa.” Liam paused to chuckle and shake his head in amusement. “You actually got your friend to pose as a fake suitor and somehow convinced an honorable and highly dignified member of the court to sponsor her?”
“Yeaaaah, I still don’t know how the hell I did that. I should get extra points for my manipulation skills”
Liam laughed. "I believe you mean, negotiation skills."
Riley nodded. "Yeah, those too."
Already well past the time to make his grand entrance, Bastien approached Liam to give the final warning. Liam acknowledged him and turned back to Riley. “I hope I’ll see you again later tonight, if you’ll save a dance for me. But until then …” He pressed her willing body against the wall, tracing the back of his forefinger along her velvety cheek. “ … just know how very, very, happy I am to have you here, Riley.” His lips were fire and ice when he leaned down to meet her equally fevered ones in a lingering kiss. And she melted right into him.
With that, Liam was whisked away by the head guard and made his way into the ballroom. As a panting Riley brushed her fingertips over the tingling in her bottom lip, she felt so many things all at once: relief that he was happy she was there and already knew everything regarding Alyssa, and that same exhilarating bliss that swept her off her feet two days ago when they shared their time together. But he was abundantly clear, this wasn’t New York anymore, and he still had a duty and obligation to Cordonia regardless of his apparent feelings for her. 
Riley let a puff of air and pushed her backside off the wall to return inside. Just as she did this, the crooked frame bearing the likeness of the late King Fabian she admired earlier fell from its hook and crashed to the floor, causing the ancient glass to shatter beside her. With her head shrunken into her shoulders, Riley slowly peeked out one eye and saw the damage. Glancing down one end of the hall to the other to see if anyone saw her, she glanced down at the shards and still fully intact artwork. Normally she would have hightailed it out of there, but she couldn’t help herself from giving her destruction parting words. 
“I guess you’re not … hung anymore.”
Then she bolted the hell out of there.
--------------
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dingoes8myrp · 4 years ago
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An Examination of Joss Whedon
On February 11th, Charisma Carpenter made a post on her Instagram account detailing mistreatment she experienced on the sets of Angel and Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Carpenter worked on both shows from 1996 to 2004 and attributes this mistreatment to show creator Joss Whedon.
On the same day, I made a post on my Tumblr and my WordPress accounts regarding my stance on this topic. I felt it was important for me to post something quickly due to the large number of Buffyverse followers and mutuals on my Tumblr.
I was overwhelmed by the likes, reblogs, and comments this post received in less than twenty-four hours. I’m so glad so many people support Charisma Carpenter and others who are speaking out about their experiences.
Workplace mistreatment is insidious, and too often the systems in place to mediate these situations are designed to protect the employer rather than the person experiencing mistreatment. This happens everywhere in every industry. When people in the public eye draw attention to these issues it helps bring awareness to everyone and encourages societal change.
In today’s climate, social media moves faster than legal or internal HR systems. This means, more often than not, accusations spread, opinions form, and action is taken long before any investigation can occur. Because of this, it’s important for people to seek out the facts themselves in order to stay informed or make decisions about who in fandom they choose to support or not.
I’m going to go through various tid-bits I’ve seen over the past twenty-five years regarding Joss Whedon’s behavior, which prompted my quick response to Charisma Carpenter’s post. I feel it’s important to share this with those who may be new to the fandom, or those who doubt Charisma Carpenter’s claims and those of others.
The Bronze
Before there was Twitter, there was The Bronze.
The Bronze was the official online gathering place of Buffyverse fans. Joss Whedon and others involved with the shows occasionally popped in and posted, interacting with the fans. There was speculation about the trajectory of the show, discussion about lore, fan theories, and behind the scenes rumors.
I didn’t learn about these forums until I was in high school (from 2002 to 2006) and I never posted. I just read up on the fun factoids I could find. I wasn’t a heavy Internet user back then. We had one computer in my house and it was shared with my parents. I was only allowed on for so much time per day, yada yada.
I think Buffy the Vampire Slayer was one of the first shows – if not the first – to utilize this kind of creator/fan interaction. It wasn’t a regular thing back then.
The vibe of these forums was very laidback. When someone directly involved with Buffy the Vampire Slayer or Angel posted (known as a V.I.P.) it was with a very casual, unmoderated tone. There was no screenshotting every word to be saved for later. Someone from the media couldn’t grab a comment made and spread it across the Internet in real time. There were mailing lists – collections of email addresses for people who wanted updates on show spoilers or particular non-show activities of various actors. Fan letters were still a thing – actual snail mail letters you could send to actors and writers of the shows. Things moved slowly, and there wasn’t as much transparency as there is on the Internet today with sites like Instagram and Twitter.
In a series of posts made on November 6th, 2001, Joss Whedon reacted to the airing of the musical episode, “Once More with Feeling.” He called it “the biggest undertaking of my life,” but expressed his appreciation toward the UPN network, the cast, and crew – particularly Anthony Head, Amber Benson, and James Marsters. He calls Anthony Head “the golden throat” and writes of James Marsters, “And James, who always tells me to do everything I dream of, then brings that intense voice and those cheekbones along for the ride.”
All he writes about Amber Benson is, “Amber… just, you know… Amber….”
Alarmingly absent from his praise is star Sarah Michelle Gellar, who “went back and forth” over whether or not to sing in the episode. “I’m not a singer,” she told EW. She didn’t feel prepared enough and “didn’t feel confident.” As someone who broke out of her comfort zone and pulled off a wonderful leading performance, Gellar was certainly deserving of some acknowledgment.
Seemingly realizing he neglected to mention Marti Noxon, Whedon tacked on, “Do you know anyone that hot who can run a show? Do you? I don’t think so. What a voice.” At the time, alongside comments about James Marsters’ cheekbones and being “a little gay” for Anthony Head, this seemed to be an attempt at an edgy complement (though a little cringey). Marti Noxon was a new showrunner for Buffy, taking over for Joss. Referring to her as hot rather than praising her work is a little demeaning, in my opinion, particularly when it was up to him to make sure she was respected and taken seriously in filling his shoes.
On May 22nd, 2002, Whedon posted about “the gay thing” – probably not for the first time. Regarding some fan reactions to the death of Tara Maclay, Joss wrote, “I knew some people would be angry with me for destroying the only gay couple on the show, but the idea that I COULDN’T kill Tara because she was gay is as offensive to me as the idea that I DID kill her because she was gay. Willow’s story was not about being gay. It was about weakness, addiction, loss… the way life hits you in the gut right when you think you’re back on your feet.”
Keep in mind, at the time, Willow was one of the first gay main characters – if not THE first – on a major primetime show in the sci-fi/fantasy genre. Having a gay couple on a major show like this was not a regular thing, which made the shocking death of Tara and the dark turn of Willow particularly hard-hitting. While Whedon isn’t saying anything particularly inflammatory here, it does show a sort of crass attitude toward the removal of this representation from the show, which had become so important to so many fans – and still is now.
There’s not a lot of meaty information to be found that I could dig up, but I wanted to give people an idea of this landscape back in the day. I picked out those particular Joss Whedon posts because they show a very casual disregard for the women involved in the shows – an insidious and subtle thing, but it’s there.
Fighting with Buffy
Jeff Pruitt was a stunt coordinator on Buffy the Vampire Slayer from 1997 to 2000. He also happened to be romantically involved with Sarah Michelle Gellar’s stunt double, Sophia Crawford. Both would exit the show by its fifth season. According to Pruitt, it was not an amicable exit.
Pruitt claims he and Crawford were treated badly on the set, that Crawford was “one never ending injury” and she had “reached the end of her rope.” He said that they were threatened and blackballed when they made attempts to leave before the 100th episode. They got an opportunity to work on Dark Angel, but the people at Dark Angel supposedly received a phone call from “someone high up at their studio” and were told not to hire Pruitt and Crawford. He suspects this was to keep Sophia Crawford from leaving Buffy the Vampire Slayer.
Their firing was unceremonious, according to Pruitt. “Sophia was told point blank that she was being fired because she knew too much about things,” he claimed. He said Joss Whedon and Jane Espenson threatened Crawford, saying if she spoke about what happened on set she’d “never work in this town again.”
Jeff Pruitt spoke about “sneaky politics” behind the scenes, saying “there was something weird going on” in the months leading up to his and Crawford’s exit. Pruitt claims Sarah Michelle Gellar was a “spoiled starlett” and that she was “out to get” him and Crawford. He attributes statements he made in private emails that were later read by Joss Whedon to his firing.
It’s worth noting that many people have stated that Sarah Michelle Gellar is undeserving of a “diva” label. When asked in 2004 what it was like working with Sarah Michelle Gellar, Julie Benz said, “She’s extremely talented and generous. Her reputation is just completely untrue. Unfortunately in Hollywood if you’re young and female and you have an opinion you get labeled a diva or something…else. Sarah’s an amazing talent, but she got labeled.”
In a 2013 interview on Bravo’s Watch What Happens Live, Alyson Hannigan answered a series of rapid-fire questions about Buffy the Vampire Slayer. When asked who was the most “annoyed” by the end of the show, she said, “Sarah,” referring to Sarah Michelle Gellar. When the audience booed, Hannigan clarified, “Well, she had a big career going, and it was a lot of work.” When asked when Gellar started to “hate” the show, Hannigan quickly said season three. In a later interview for Huffpost Live, Hannigan clarified her comments further. “[Sarah Michelle Gellar] worked her butt off,” she stated. “She worked eighteen-hour days for years.” Hannigan said she wouldn’t have classified Gellar as “annoyed,” saying, “she was super professional.”
Honestly, I’m Team Sarah on this one. I couldn’t find corroborating sources for Jeff Pruitt’s claims of her “diva” behavior, but I found several sources stating otherwise. Gellar did confirm during a cast reunion that she may have oversold her stunt experience, which ultimately would have meant more work for her stunt double and the stunt coordinator. It seems to me like this set everything on a bad foot with that team. But, the reasons Jeff Pruitt and Sophia Crawford gave for their exit had little-to-nothing to do with Gellar.
Vincent Kartheiser
Vincent Kartheiser played Connor on Angel, and he did a number of interviews talking about his experience on the show. I picked his interviews because I’ve always found him to be very candid and he doesn’t seem to shy away from uncomfortable answers to questions. A few of his answers provide a little insight into the mood on the set at times, and Charisma Carpenter’s attitude.
When Charisma Carpenter was pregnant on the show, she had a storyline that heavily involved Connor, so the two spent a lot of time working together on set. He was asked about her pregnancy and how it affected filming. In a 2003 interview for BBC Cult, Kartheiser said of Carpenter, “she was a great sport and would suck up the pain even though you could see that she was in it.”
In another interview for Angel Magazine from the same year, he said Carpenter had “an abundance of energy for a working, pregnant lady who, right in the heart of her pregnancy, they put her in so much.”
It’s worth noting Vincent Kartheiser had his own issues with the show. “What really made me interested in Angel was the idea that as a show, it changed so much and all the characters could change so much,” he told Angel Magazine. “It wasn’t that clichéd kind of ‘show up, do your thing, go home’ all the time.” Unfortunately, the potential that interested him never came to fruition for his character. “As the season went on, we never really got to deal with the relationship problems between me and David,” Kartheiser said, referring to David Boreanaz as Angel. “I never really got the opportunity to bond with any other characters.” He expressed a feeling that there was nowhere for his character to go and that Connor’s motivations seemed to change from week to week. “There were parts of the season I didn’t have the opportunity to stretch,” he explained, “that it felt like I was doing the same scene over and over.”
Vincent Kartheiser did a later interview with Giantmag.com where he reiterated some of these frustrations. For him, the character of Connor started to get stale early on. “Every week I’d show up and have a scene with Cordelia,” he said, “then Angel would show up and I’d have some sort of conflict with him. There’d be a couple of fight scenes where I’d fight with them even though I didn’t want to and then I would sulk and leave. That to me was every episode.” He felt the writers had written Connor “into a corner” and that fans responded poorly to him.
When comparing his experience on Angel to his experience playing Pete Campbell on Mad Men, Kartheiser expressed a lackluster feeling on the set of Angel. “There was a real sense on Angel that people were just doing a job,” Kartheiser said of the set. “The grips, the DP, even the directors would kind of just show up, do their job and go home.” This atmosphere is a direct contrast to what had attracted Vincent Kartheiser to the show in the first place. “On Mad Men we also have Matthew Weiner on set all the time whereas Joss [Whedon] was hardly ever on Angel,” Kartheiser explained. “I think Joss was doing Firefly at that point and was in love with his next project. I had a friend who filmed a few episodes in the first season of Angel and said everyone was invested and there was crazy energy, so maybe I just came into it late.”
Kartheiser also delved deeper into his frustrations over the direction (or lack thereof) of his character. “I let them know right off the bat that some of the choices they were making [about Conner] were wrong,” he said. “I showed up to play that character and I had a lot of ideas. And they didn’t like any of those ideas.” As a result, Kartheiser said he got “jaded” and “angry” at the show. “I felt like it wasn’t a collaboration, that the people I was working with didn’t care to take risks.”
In hindsight, he went on to say, “I was never a fan of Buffy, I’ll say it straight out. I was never a fan of Angel. I always found it hard to say Joss’ words.”
From all these comments, both from the beginning of Vincent Kartheiser’s journey as Connor, and from a few years after the show ended, it seems like he was excited for the opportunity, but ultimately disappointed with the overall experience. He also revealed how uncomfortable Charisma Carpenter had to be during filming while she was pregnant, but noted her energy and attitude were never a problem.
Farewell Cordelia
Prior to Charisma Carpenter’s official exit from Angel, her character arc had taken a very strange turn and Cordelia had been ominously left in a coma. Concern grew when Charisma Carpenter was not included in the cast of season 5. In a 2003 interview with TV Guide Online, Joss Whedon stated, “The Angel/Cordelia [love story] had gone pretty much as far as we wanted to take it” and that it wasn’t popular with the fans. “It just seemed like a good time for certain people to move on,” he continued. “Not completely, obviously. I’m hoping that we’ll get Charisma to do some episodes as Cordelia sometime during the year.”
TV Guide asked, “Isn’t that a disservice to fans who invested all those years in the character and her redemption? It seems an odd thing to do to the show’s leading lady.” Whedon responded, “That’s a fluctuating concept, the leading lady thing. And it is a little odd. Some choices are ultimately kind of controversial about who stays and who goes and who we focus on. But obviously, we had to have her out of a bunch of episodes toward the end of the year because she was having a baby… so what we had [leading] up to it wasn’t a dynamic I wanted to play out that much.” When asked if things were left on good terms with Charisma Carpenter, Joss Whedon stated he wouldn’t discuss that in an interview.
From Charisma Carpenter’s perspective, she was uncomfortable with Cordelia’s storyline prior to her coma and her death. “It was creepy,” she said of Cordelia’s relationship with Connor. “Connor was Angel’s son and half my age.” Carpenter stated it was important for her to return to wrap up the character’s storyline. “We didn’t want to just leave Cordelia in a coma,” she stated. “Whatever happens after this, I’m open. But it’s just best this story be [resolved] now. Otherwise, it’s a disservice to the fans of our show.” When pressed regarding whether or not she’d return to the show, Carpenter replied, “I don’t think it’ll be necessary. You never say never. However, at this point in time, I don’t see a future for her.” She continued with, “I feel like Joss feels – the Cordelia stories have been told. There were no other directions to go with her.”
Carpenter’s final appearance as Cordelia was an emotional experience. “We’ve been crying for the last two days,” she said in a behind-the-scenes interview. “I’m so physically drained.” She wasn’t the only one affected, either. “The director was crying, the crew was crying, we were crying,” she said. She called it a sad goodbye personally, professionally, and story-wise.
Working with Joss Whedon
Over the years, Joss Whedon gained a reputation for being unconventional to work with. Many actors from the Buffyverse have said they were unhappy with their characters’ creative paths. Sarah Michelle Gellar felt season six “betrayed” who Buffy was, saying she had to be “talked off a ledge” a number of times during filming.
Nicholas Brendon felt the character of Xander was “underrated,” particularly during season seven. “Joss did have a talk with Sarah and I because he was kind of contemplating the idea of Xander and Buffy ending up together at the end of season seven,” Brendon told AV Club. “We were both for it, but then that never came to fruition and I lost my eye.”
On an episode of Michael Rosenbaum’s Inside of You podcast, James Marsters said he was “terrified” of Joss Whedon. “I wasn’t designed to be a romantic character,” he explained. “The audience reacted that way to it. And I remember [Joss Whedon] backed me up against a wall one day, and he was just like, ‘I don’t care how popular you are, kid. You’re dead! You hear me? You’re dead! Dead!” Rosenbaum asked, “Was he kidding around?” and Marsters replied, “No. Hell, no.” Marsters also said he had “open wounds” on his scalp from over-using bleach on his roots every eight days to keep the roots from growing out.
Multiple actors from Angel have talked about Whedon’s habit of making actors squirm. David Boreanaz spoke about how he learned about the Angel spinoff during a twentieth anniversary cast reunion. “I got a phone call that Joss wanted to talk to me,” Boreanaz recalled. “The only thing he said was, ‘I want you to come into my office tomorrow,’ and I’m like, ‘I’m fired.’” He described having a night of “angst” and spent the following day working on some flashback scenes. When he finally met with Whedon at lunch it took some time for Whedon to tell him his character was getting a spin-off. Alexis Denisof expressed a similar knee-jerk feeling of “uh-oh,” but had an idea the spin-off was filming. However, Amy Acker had a similar story to what Boreanaz experienced when she was told about her character Fred’s transformation into Illyria. “It seems to be an echo of, like, ‘Hey, can you meet me for coffee tomorrow?’ and I’m like, ‘Ohh, they’re firing me!’ And we sat down to coffee and he said, ‘I just wanted you to know I’m killing Fred.’ And he waited, like, really a long time.” Charisma Carpenter chimed in, “He likes to do that!” Acker was then informed she would still be on the show as Illyria.
Charisma Carpenter and Marti Noxon have shared their own stories about Joss’s “You’re fired, just kidding” stories. Seth Green quipped “He did that to me too, but it took.”
Whedon’s View of Women
While Joss Whedon considers his writing to be feminist, his portrayal of women as well as other statements he’s made contradict this. In 2013, he gave a speech for Equality Now about his dislike of the word “feminist.” While this speech earned him some acclaim, it also earned him some backlash from the feminist community. This was mainly because he claimed it’s natural for people to be equal, and to add “-ist” to the end of the word “feminist” implies that people’s natural state is to be unequal. This stance was seen as disrespectful to Feminism as a movement, for some.
Joss Whedon received wide criticism for his portrayal of women in the Marvel Cinematic Universe. One critic, Scott Mendelson, talked about Whedon’s portrayal of Scarlet Witch and Black Widow in Avengers: Age of Ultron. “Scarlet Witch eventually has to be coaxed into bravery by one of the male heroes,” Mendelson writes of Elizabeth’s Olson’s character. Mendelson was even less thrilled with Scarlet Johansson’s Natasha Romanoff. “Maybe I shouldn’t be annoyed that the only major female character’s primary arc is a theoretically unrequited pining for a nice guy with major anger issues,” he writes, “or that said character briefly gets captured by the villain in the second act and tossed in a cage for no reason other than to be rescued by her male compatriots.” Backlash over this film caused Whedon to quit Twitter. In an article for Gizmodo, writers Meredith Woerner and Katharine Trendacosta point out that Joss Whedon teased a “killer” backstory for Natasha Romanoff. “Instead of an assassin constantly struggling with finding moral lines she didn’t know existed, we got a woman who feels incomplete because she cannot have babies,” Woerner and Trendacosta concluded.
In 2017, Whedon’s ex-wife Kai Cole wrote a blog for The Wrap stating, “he used his relationship with me as a shield, both during and after our marriage, so no one would question his relationships with other women or scrutinize his writing as anything other than feminist.”
Cole alleges Whedon wrote her a letter in which he said, “When I was running ‘Buffy,’ I was surrounded by beautiful, needy, aggressive young women… As a guilty man I knew the only way to hide was to act as though I were righteous… In many ways I was the HEIGHT of normal, in this culture. We’re taught to be providers and companions and at the same time, to conquer and acquire — specifically sexually — and I was pulling off both!” At the end of her essay, Cole wrote, “I want the people who worship him to know he is human, and the organizations giving him awards for his feminist work, to think twice in the future about honoring a man who does not practice what he preaches.”
In response to Kai Cole’s letter, Laura M. Browning wrote in an AV Club article, “I was sad, but not shocked—maybe a little embarrassed I hadn’t looked more closely at some very clear problems in his work… His work has plenty of male gaze and women in refrigerators and some narratively pointless rape scenes—it’s all right there, in hundreds of hours of television and film—but boy, it sure is a lot more comfortable to listen to a guy tell you he’s a feminist than listen to a lot of women telling you he’s not.”
Whedon’s veneer of feminism has been cracking for several years.
Recent Allegations
Actor Ray Fisher claimed Joss Whedon behaved inappropriately on the set of Justice League, tweeting, “Joss Wheadon’s on-set treatment of the cast and crew of Justice League was gross, abusive, unprofessional, and completely unacceptable.” Fisher also accused Geoff Johns and Jon Berg of enabling Whedon’s behavior. An investigation was done by Warner Brothers and co-stars Jason Mamoa and Kiersey Clemons publicly supported Fisher. Ultimately, the investigation concluded and “remedial action” was taken. The action taken has not been specified.
Shortly after, Joss Whedon exited the HBO series The Nevers, which Fisher attributes to his own claims.
Team Charisma
Those who have shown support to Charisma Carpenter include: Sarah Michelle Gellar Ray Fisher J. August Richards Michelle Trachtenberg Amber Benson Eliza Dushku Jose Molina Marti Noxon Emma Caulfield James Marsters Anthony Head Clare Kramer James C. Leary Sophia Crawford David Boreanaz Amy Acker Julie Benz Danny Strong Adam Busch Tom Lenk Nicholas Brendon Jeff Mariotte
Others who have written about Joss Whedon or come out to support those coming forward:
Courtney Enlow Nell Scovell Glen Mazzara
My Conclusion
As I stated in my previous post on this topic, I stand with Team Charisma. It is not okay for a person in a position of power over others in the workplace to misuse that power in an inappropriate or abusive manner. No matter how talented that person may be and how beloved the work may be.
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lunarmessenger · 4 years ago
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RFA Dating Asexual MC - RFA, V, + Saeran
request sent in by @engel-katze . this is for you, angel! 
DISCLAIMER: I myself am NOT asexual and I can’t convey the broad spectrum that is asexuality. If any of my followers are asexual and feel like this does not represent them at all please let me know and I will adjust it to the best of my ability. I would hate to misrepresent anybody, and I want to make sure you all are seen and heard as accurately as possible. I love you. - luna xx
warnings: some sexual themes, but nothing too crazy.
Zen:
• He’s taken by surprise for sure
• He doesn’t understand it at first; he thought that maybe you just weren’t ready to go all the way with him yet, and he respected that
• But one night the both of you were exchanging kisses here and there and his hands started to wander and you could see his expression getting darker with need
• So you shoved him off of you and onto the floor
• “MC I’m so sorry I should have known that you weren’t ready yet I—”
• He isn’t hurt at all by your pushing away he just wants to understand
• And so you explain to him that it’s not...personal per say
• You thought that he was very handsome and if you could, you would absolutely jump his bones every second
• Though he’d never tell his ego was nice and fluffed by that reassurance
• But the thought of the act of having sex (with anybody, not just him) made you physically sick and he never made you feel bad about it once; if anything he was happy that you were communicating
• The two of you discuss maybe alternatives or different ways to both have that sexual release with each other, without any sort of act of intercourse involved so that it wouldn’t negatively effect you.
Yoosung
 • His self esteem took a rather hard hit for sure
• He thought that you didn’t even romantically like him and didn’t know how to tell him otherwise
• One night his hand was on your thigh and he started softly running his hand up and down
• You looked away from the television to look at him, noticing how his brows were furrowed from nerves as he looked at you.
• “Yoosung...?” Your voice was anxious and he could tell, but he thought that maybe if he just tried a little harder; made the first push.
• He kissed you once, and then gently placed you in his lap, and as you sat there you could feel his lower region beginning to harden
• “Oh, oh God no wait—” You hurriedly pushed yourself off, standing away from him across the coffee table as his face fell
• “Is...is it me? Am I not attractive enough? I know that I’m not rich like Jumin, or as toned and attractive as Zen, but...” His eyes started to fill with tears and you instantly felt your heart sank
• “No! Oh, God Yoosung no please...” You hurriedly ran to his lap and knelt in front of him, taking his hands in yours
• You tried your best to explain what it was and why you didn’t really want to have sex with him
• He was so relived that he cried
• He’s lowkey okay with it because while, he’s never experienced sex and he knows that he wants to have sex and experiences sexual attraction
• He’s too anxious about his performance in the bedroom to do anything anyway; he just tried initiating things because he thought that’s what you wanted
Jaehee
• Not even phased lmao
• You’d decided to tell her one night after work when the two of you were exhausted and you just blurted it out
• “I...I’m asexual, Jaehee. I don’t...I don’t feel sexual attraction.”
• “....okay.”
• That was literally it
• You were actually a little pissy that she reacted so calmly; since that’s not the reaction you usually get
• She honestly didn’t care if you wanted to have sex or not; if anything after you’d explained to her what it was she herself thought that that might be her sexuality too
• She has always been romantically attracted to women, but when it came to sex for either gender she just felt...like it was pointless. No need.
• “I think I was able to take it so easily MC is because, well, I think I am too.”
• You were okay with that. More than okay with that.
Jumin
• It was hard enough for Jumin to get a better understanding of his own emotions
• You didn’t want to overwhelm him with your sexuality, especially because of how rare it was
• One night the two of you were in bed, his hands wandering over your body as you two kissed
• You weren’t fully comfortable but you figured maybe, just maybe you could do it. For him.
• That didn’t work well at all
• “Are you sure, MC?”
• “Yes, Jumin. Go ahead.”
• “...Then why are you crying?” You hadn’t even realized until he said it, shaking your head softly as you sniffed
• “Don’t worry about it okay? Just..are you almost done?”
• “MC.” He was concerned and a little hurt, immediately pulling away as he turned on the bedroom lights
• You covered your naked body and immediately began to sob, Jumin holding you close as your body shook from how hard you were crying
• “I’m so sorry, please don’t be angry with me. I...I’m asexual, Jumin. I can’t do it I can’t—”
• “Shh, MC it’s alright. It’s okay. I just wish you’d told me sooner, darling...”
• After that night Jumin tried his best to make sure he didn’t cross any boundaries
• If he wasn’t working on paperwork from his job he was reading a book on asexuality and researching it, just to make sure he knew the ins and outs of a rather important part of you
707
• He thinks you’re joking at first when you tell him the poor idiot
• He knows that asexuality is rare and so he figured it was just another sort of prank or joke that you were trying to pull
• To be fair you were rather nonchalant about it because you figured it was important he know and that he wouldn’t make a big deal out of it like others have in the past
• So he freaks out when out of nowhere he shoves his hands down your pants with a cheeky giggle while you guys are play fighting and you immediately scream and bite his shoulder
• And I mean bite it like you drew blood from how hard you bit this man
• “Ah! MC, what the hell?!”
• “I should be asking you that! What is your problem? Don’t stick your hand down my pants you asshole!”
• You immediately ran out of the living room and slammed the bedroom door behind you, feeling embarrassed and a little violated by your own boyfriend
• While he hurriedly tends to his shoulder to stop the bleeding his mind immediately drifts back to the conversation you’d had with him towards the beginning of the relationship
• He literally wants to kms he’s so mad at himself
• He figured you two hadn’t had sex yet because you were just trying to take it slow; after all it’d only been a few months
• Now he understands
• He gave you time to calm down and after about an hour he reaches out to you
• He fiercely apologizes and promises that he will educate himself better and take you more seriously
V
• Like Jumin he’s not really familiar with the term itself
• So when you bring it up to him he’s a little embarrassed to ask so many questions to clarify what that meant for the two of you
• “Essentially, you don’t feel sexual attraction? Like when you look at me, or anybody else who you want to have sex you just don’t feel the need to?”
• “In a way, yeah. Every person who is asexual is different, but that’s how I feel about it. I personally can have sex with you I just... I won’t really want it and I don’t need it.”
• Still a bit confused but he respects your boundaries, always
• “Okay, MC. Thank you for letting me know.”
• He’s never been in a relationship like this before, and his last one was a complete train wreck
• But he’s trying
• You both establish boundaries with one another when it comes to intimacy; what he’s comfortable with and what you’re comfortable with
• It was a bit rough and took a lot of adjusting but with patience and progress the two of you ended up with a healthy and happy relationship
Saeran
• “You’re what?”
• He really isn’t trying to be an asshole, he just genuinely is surprised and confused
• He’s still dealing with his emotional and physical trauma that he went through from his childhood and Mint Eye
• The idea of having sex and being intimate with you was the last thing on his mind and you were okay with that
• At first he thought that your sexuality had something to do with your upbringing and trauma and he thought you two would be able to relate
• While you didn’t have the easiest childhood, that wasn’t why you were asexual. That’s just...the way you were. You always have been asexual you were just born that way.
• “So it’s like when you’re gay? Or bisexual?”
• “Yes precisely.”
• He understands a lot more now and he tries his best to educate himself and keep himself in line
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vanessakirbyfans · 4 years ago
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Vanessa Kirby suggests we meet on the Mall, the central location for her on-screen triumph as the young Princess Margaret in The Crown. I’m standing outside the shuttered Institute of Contemporary Arts when she strides into view, a slender, leggy figure with bleached hair and brilliant blue eyes, clad in trademark black, but for her gleaming white Converse trainers.
"I haven’t been here since we were filming!" she marvels through her mask, gazing up the processional avenue towards Buckingham Palace. "I was whizzing up the road on a motorbike, holding onto the back of Matthew Goode [as Antony Armstrong-Jones] and feeling so exhilarated about what on Earth was happening to my life – being in a job I loved, playing someone I loved."
Her ebullient mood was dented when Margaret’s handbag, into which she’d put her own phone, was blown away from between her feet, and an opportunistic passer-by ran off with it. "By the time I could check Find My iPhone, it was already in Leicester Square," she says. "Of course, the costume department were furious because the bag was vintage and a one-off." We both laugh, rather ruefully, for such anecdotes already seem to belong to a more carefree time. This bright, crisp lunchtime in lockdown, the Mall is all but deserted –there would be no need for roadblocks or filming at dawn today – while the roles Kirby is here to discuss are light-years away from her embodiment of a pampered royal party girl.
The morning of our meeting, Pieces of a Woman has launched on Netflix to rapturous reviews and critical acclaim that has seen Kirby, in her first lead role, picked as a front-runner for the award season’s most coveted best-actress gongs.
It is not, however, an easy watch. Kirby plays Martha, a first-time mother whose baby dies moments after being born; the film follows Martha’s subsequent disintegration, alongside that of her close relationships. Her labour, which comes at the start of the film, is some 26 minutes of one unbroken take that manages to be simultaneously intimate and menacing as the camera swoops around the apartment and hovers beside the traumatised protagonists.
Kirby’s performance is astonishingly unselfconscious, which is the more surprising since she never went to drama school (turning down the offer of a place at Lamda in favour of stage roles at Bolton’s Octagon Theatre) and says she couldn't bring herself to dance in front of her friends. "I’m the one who sits in the corner and watches." She describes seeing herself on-screen as "disconcerting", and "not a very natural human experience", and indeed even finds making Zoom calls a trial. "There’s nothing to hide behind!"
For Pieces of a Woman, the director Kornel Mundruczo decided that the birth scene would be the first to be shot, she tells me, as we stroll around St James’s Park, conducting ourselves like a couple of spies in a Le Carré novel. "I knew I’d have to be naked, and literally open my legs and give birth in front of a group of strangers I’d only met that morning. I was actually quite thankful – I thought, the rest of it’s going to be a lot easier."
In fact, she says, she found herself swept away by the emotion of the story. "Normally, it’s so hard to forget there are machines in your face, but I had no idea that a camera was even there." Was it traumatic to act? "The first time we shot it, I was literally sobbing for 10 minutes afterwards. I couldn’t get out of it. My brain was telling me it wasn’t real, but my unconscious didn’t know the difference, especially with having a real baby in my arms.
"Kornel came over onto the bed and held me so tight. He didn’t let go of me for five minutes, and he said, 'Just remember this feeling.' That really helped me for the rest of the movie, when the character doesn’t express anything, but almost has to be doing the howling without speaking a word."
Kirby took her research seriously, even asking a mother-to-be –a total stranger – to allow her to be present in the delivery room at the birth of her son in a north-London hospital. "I remember every single second of it," the actress says emphatically. "I was there, glued to my seat, for seven hours, not even a loo break! I was just amazed, in awe. I saw a woman completely surrender and go on this spiritual journey, which involved indescribable pain, clearly, but also ecstasy. It gave me a whole new respect for women and how powerful they are, and a new empathy for men, because they feel so helpless. And obviously, seeing the baby come out was the most incredible thing in the world I’ve ever seen, by far. After he was born, all of the mother’s colour returned, she looked like an angel, she had a kind of holy glow." Bathetically, it was only then that the couple recognised Kirby. "They were going, 'Oh my God, it’s Princess Margaret! This is so weird!'"
The experience has given her a new philosophy on life, she says. "I was watching the mother go through these contractions, which were excruciating, and the pushing, and then there was a moment of calm, and of expansion. And so, when I’m going through things in my life, I say to myself, this is like a contraction, surrender to it, because there might be something born from it. Sometimes we don’t want that; when we’re feeling something horrible, we want it to pass as far as possible. I’m teaching myself to allow it to be there and not resist or push it away, and that’s because of that woman."
But her character’s storyline also demanded that Kirby understand the experience of stillbirth. A friend introduced her to a woman who had lost her baby Luciana under eerily similar circumstances to those in Martha’s narrative. "She shared everything with me." They have become close friends, and the film’s ending is dedicated to Luciana. Kirby continues to work with Sands, the Stillbirth and Neonatal Death charity, and is voluble in her admiration of the Duchess of Sussex and Chrissy Teigen, both of whom have recently spoken out about their own experiences of miscarriage.
"I feel so close to them and so proud of them for breaking that silence," she says. "Meghan is probably the last person who would feel comfortable sharing her very personal, intimate feelings. It’s that courage that I want to continue to honour. What they’re saying is, if you’ve been through it, we have too, we share your story. I think that makes you feel less lonely. But one in four pregnancies ends in miscarriage, which is far more than I knew about. Society finds it difficult to hold space for that kind of pain."
Her parents, to whom she is very close, have both seen the film and wept throughout, she says. As if on cue, her phone pings, and her eyes soften when she checks the message; it’s a childhood friend who herself miscarried, getting in touch to say how much the film has meant to her.
The integrity of Kirby’s performance has already netted her the Volpi Cup for Best Actress at the Venice Film Festival. "It doesn’t seem real," she says. "I have it in its case – I wouldn’t have it on display, it looks like a football trophy – but occasionally I glance at it and think, 'Did that really happen? Or did I make it up in a weird dream?'" In a similar vein, she is reluctant to engage with the Oscar buzz surrounding her. "I don’t even know when they are," she admits. "My 13-year-old self would have a heart attack. It’s ridiculous, isn’t it!"
Kirby’s other film, The World to Come, is set in mid-19th-century America but touches on the same themes of bereavement and redemption. The central character Abigail, played by Katherine Waterston, has also lost her young daughter, and in her grief, turns away from her husband to have an affair with Tallie, her free-spirited, flame-haired neighbour. "I was glad I was playing Tallie rather than Abigail, because it might have been a bit too much," Kirby confesses – though without giving away spoilers, that role is pretty traumatic too...
The screenplay is taken from the short story of the same name by Jim Shepard, which was inspired by an entry he found in an antique diary: 'My best friend’s moved away, and I don’t know if I’ll ever see her again.' "It was one woman’s voice, like an echo from the past, and we’ll never know who she was," says Kirby. "The World to Come really educated me about what life was like for women not that long ago. They didn’t have a choice about anything they did with their time. You were owned by the house, and the man, and you had no freedom outside that. The best thing about doing this mad job sometimes is having your ignorance illuminated. I gravitate towards things that push beyond my experience, I want to go to places I don’t know, I’m not familiar with."
The experience of making both films has changed her profoundly. "I can’t do anything unless it means something to me now," she says. "It’s a better way to work, because you’re not focused on yourself at all. So maybe I’ll only work once every 10 years!"
To ensure that this is not the case, and in order to find more untold, female-led stories, her ambition is now to set up her own production company. "Even a few years ago, a film about a woman losing a baby would have been unthinkable. There are so many voiceless people, and I have a voice in this industry, and I want to make sure the tribe is represented properly."
It is undeniably awkward, therefore, that her male co-stars in the films, Shia LaBeouf and Casey Affleck, both of whom play violent, abusive husbands, have been called out for their treatment of women. In December, the British singer FKA Twigs filed a lawsuit against LaBeouf, her ex-partner, alleging that he "hurts women. He uses them. He abuses them, both physically and mentally". While LaBeouf largely denied the accusations, he admitted in a statement to The New York Times: "I have a history of hurting the people closest to me. I’m ashamed of that history and am sorry to those I hurt. There is nothing else I can really say."
Meanwhile, Affleck was sued by two female crew members working on his 2010 film I’m Still Here, one of whom accused him of sexual harassment. He denied the allegations, and the lawsuits were settled out of court, but he later told the Associated Press: "I behaved in a way, and I allowed others to behave in a way, that was really unprofessional, and I’m sorry."
Kirby is understandably reluctant to get into any of this. "I can’t comment on a legal case that’s going on in someone’s personal life," she says. "I feel really protective of Pieces, so that’s what I want to speak about. Because it came out at eight this morning, all I can think about is the mothers I spoke to, and wanting them to be my focus. I just know my job is to honour them."
Perhaps counter-intuitively, starring in Pieces has awakened in her the desire for a family of her own. "It’s definitely made me want a baby, for sure," she says; but she hasn’t currently got a partner, having split up from Callum Turner (Frank Churchill in last year’s Emma), whom she met when they co-starred in the 2014 film Queen & Country. "This year has made me think a lot about the home I want to create. I like the idea of inviting someone into a space that’s mine, preferably before I have kids."
In the near future, however, Kirby has nothing on her plate except for getting through a third lockdown. "I’m free as a bird! I’ve read a lot of stuff, and said no to a lot of stuff..." She currently shares a flat in Tooting, south London, with her sister Juliet, an assistant director, and two friends. "I was just about to move out to live on my own in north London – my God, I would have been so lonely! My sister saved me. It was so nice to have routines together. We were trying to take a bit of exercise, cooking together, watching films that made us feel better, drinking wine on Friday nights..."
By now, having circled St James’s Park several times, we are strolling back towards the Corinthia Hotel, where Kirby has a full programme of Zoom interviews lined up for the afternoon. "That’s why I’m so happy to have actually had the chance to go out and meet you in real life," she says enthusiastically. "It’s funny when everything in your life closes down, and you have to sit with yourself, and you suddenly notice all the things you have and you’re grateful for. I hope that feeling never goes away – I will never underestimate how lucky I am."
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cno-inbminor · 5 years ago
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adsentio
a/n: for some reason, i got the idea of prince!akaashi stuck in my head. mildly inspired by the swan princess. 
wc: ~2.1k 
genre: arranged marriage!au, royalty!au, emerging feelings. fluff mainly? idek, it’s word vomit
royalty!au: adsentio (pt. 1) | bonus letters (pt. 1.5) | the masque (pt. 2)
-
Prince Akaashi likes to believe he’s a smart cookie, even if he’s only seven. Then again, his parents aren’t exactly the most subtle people on the planet, and he believes it’s quite obvious as to what they’re planning. In fact, not only is he aware, but the whole castle is as well. Hell, even 90% of the citizens in the kingdom are fully aware of what’s to be expected. He strongly dislikes it, and he wishes it didn’t loom over him every summer.
Ever since the summer of the year he turned five, Princess (y/n) of the West Kingdom would show up for two months to make his life miserable. To be fair, it wasn’t exactly your fault, as you were very much forced into this arrangement as he was, but it was easier to blame you. He’d rather just play fight with Bokuto all summer rather than try to include a girl. It’s not because you’re capable of kicking his butt.
That is absolutely not the case here.
His mother, the queen, is scrambling to get all the preparations done in time for (y/n)’s arrival. Akaashi almost rolls his eyes when he spots her rearranging a bouquet of roses in the dining hall. Unfortunately, she spots him from the corner of her eye and beckons him over with a frantic hand. Never one to deny a parent, he quickly jogs over to her.
“Oh darling, would you be a doll and check in on your father? He needs to be dressed properly for the West Kingdom’s arrival. Tell him to wear that cyan blue shirt of his, it’s much more flattering.”
“Do we need to be so overboard like this again? They’ve already been here twice, it’s not like they don’t know us.”
“For reasons you don’t know, they’re extra special to us. Aren’t you excited to see (y/n) again? You two got along so well last summer!”
Akaashi wrinkles his nose in distaste. “It feels like I just saw her yesterday. Bokuto and I just wanna play by ourselves.”
“Nonsense, dear. Now go check on your father, please,” His mother implores before scurrying off to another bouquet of flowers.
It’s so obvious, he thinks to himself as he jogs towards his parents’ chambers. Did they really need this alliance with the West Kingdom? Would they be that much more powerful together? “In due time, you’ll understand,” his parents always said. Akaashi was starting to become tired of hearing those words.
Why is it so hard to just tell him now as to why they want him to marry Princess (y/n)?
-
“You know why I’m here, right?” (Y/n) asks him one evening. They’re sixteen now – Akaashi counts that this is your twelfth time at the castle. You call the castle your second home, as he once heard you tell your assigned handmaiden, the same lady who attends to you every summer. Somehow, the statement strikes a chord within him – his initial childish annoyance at your presence had long disappeared and been replaced with something akin to defeat. There was very little chance that they could run from this, but in the late nights, Akaashi found himself believing that if there were someone to be betrothed to, (y/n) wasn’t so bad.
“What do you mean?” He replies, slowly turning a page in his book. You both found that one way to quickly pass the time was to raid the royal library. At first, it was custom to read your respective books at opposite ends of the castle. Yet as time passed, you found yourselves meeting closer and closer towards the middle. If desired, the servants could find you two either together in the library, in an empty ballroom by the massive windows, or on the balcony in the summer sun. Most times, Bokuto, Akaashi’s most loyal friend, was with you as well. Reading wasn’t necessarily one of his top hobbies, but he’d rather be with friends than alone wondering around the castle.
This time, the two of you have taken refuge by a fireplace, a terrible thunderstorm casting a chill over the building. Bokuto is conveniently off doing his own thing.
“The reason why I’m here every summer.”
Akaashi casts his best exasperated look towards you, but it goes unnoticed as you refuse to look away from your book. “I’ve known since I was six.”
You sigh and gently shut your novel closed, one finger stuck between the pages to keep your place. With the grace of an angel (Akaashi thinks), you pick yourself up from the lounge chair and drift over to the couch he’s sitting on. Because he’s sitting upright towards the end closest to the fire, there’s more than enough space for you to sit and stretch your legs across the cushions. In fact, you do just that, settling for leaning your back against Akaashi’s strong side profile, his arm supporting most of your weight. Without meaning to, Akaashi finds himself adjusting his sitting position for your comfort. He feels your body tremble slightly and a small wave of concern washes over him.
“Should I ask one of the servants to bring a blanket for you?”
“That won’t be necessary. But thank you for your concern, your highness.”
“You don’t have to address me as so.”
“My apologies, it’s a force of habit.”
“Hmm.”
Akaashi has long given up on reading the words before him. Your question repeats in his head like a broken record.
“Doesn’t it frustrate you?” You whisper, interrupting his thoughts. “Doesn’t it anger you that since my birth, you’ve been forced into a game that you have no choice but to play?”
Akaashi hesitates. This topic has never been broached before, and he’s not sure how to address it.
“I’ll admit it was more frustrating in the beginning. Nobody enjoys being told what to do, especially when you’re little. But I learned to just accept it. In fact, to call it a game would assume that there is a losing side. From what I’ve studied, both of our kingdoms would benefit from this merger. What’s the loss?”
“Our freedom and choice,” you bite out, yet refusing to look at him. You’ve also given up on reading, yet you don’t want to arouse suspicion that this conversation is happening. If a servant were to hear, rumors would fly around the castle like a plague. “I think it’s only human that I want to experience love the way ordinary people do. We don’t even get a say.”
“What about both of our parents? They were arranged yet they love each other.”
“Simple, they got lucky.”
“Then would you rather run away and find another man to fall in love with?”
“More than that, I just want to experience life beyond the castle walls. My position is different from yours.”
“How so?”
You purse your lips, pausing. “Your Highness, what do you think would happen to you if I were to disappear, or god forbid, die?”
Akaashi’s eyes widen in bewilderment. “Why would you ask that?”
“You just need to answer my question.”
“Well,” he ponders. “I…believe I’d be somewhat sad. We would mourn the loss, surely.”
For the first time this summer, he hears a genuine chuckle from you. “I’m honored by your sentiment, your highness. I’m asking more of what you think would politically happen to you.”
Akaashi’s cheeks flush with embarrassment. “I guess…politically I’d be okay. Mother would be devastated, but I guess they’d find me another match. The merger with your kingdom would’ve been our strongest move, but it could still happen since we’re already on such good speaking terms. Supposedly there are other princesses waiting for a chance, and a merger could result from that as well.”
“What a humble braggart you are, your highness,” you tease.
“That’s not what I meant—”
“I know. But in all seriousness,” you switch to a more solemn tone. “The point is, you’d be okay. As you so nicely put it, you have women lining up to be with you.”
“Aren’t men lining up to be with you as well?”
“It’s not the same, Your Highness. As a princess, I’m brought up to constantly prove my worth to others. More importantly, I’m raised to prove my worth as a wife and a queen. We’re left to care for the children we must bear, we must keep our noses a reasonable distance away from kingdom business. If this engagement were to break, many outsiders would automatically assume that I was deemed unworthy of you, that I must’ve wrapped myself in some horrible scandal.”
Akaashi hums and stares into the fire. “I suppose that it’s rather unfortunate. I wish I had realized that sooner.”
“Your self-awareness speaks volumes. I usually wouldn’t admit this to you, but I know you’ll be a great king when it’s your time. Your people already love you, and they will only continue to love you more.”
“That’s very kind of you, Princess.”
“I only speak honestly. There’s no need to sugarcoat my words around you.”
Somehow, Akaashi finds that very comforting. Perhaps as someone in his position, he would consider honesty and wisdom to be valuable. Just because he’s destined to be king someday, doesn’t mean he would always make the right decisions. He would appreciate having you by his side in his decision-making.
“If this happens,” Akaashi finds himself speaking, also not one for beating around the bush. “I can promise now that I’ll try to change that. Even if we end up never loving each other, I’ll do my best to ensure that you never feel confined to such a role. As my w-wife,” he stumbles over the word. “I would want your input. You have a good head on you, and I’m sure you have valuable wisdom that I will need in due time.”
“Somehow, that’s the most romantic thing a man has ever said to me,” you say. He can hear the smile in your voice, his own small one forming on his face. When you move off the couch, his body immediately misses the warmth of your body pressed against his. After you’re done dusting yourself off, you begin to curtsy. He knows that this means you’re retiring for the night, but he’d rather you not leave right now.
“Wait,” he calls out, reaching for the hand not holding your book. You stay silent as Akaashi delicately holds your hand, then breaking out into a slight blush when he lays a soft kiss on the back of your hand, eyes never breaking contact with yours. He’s never been more princely to you than this moment – though his mother had made him do this on every first day you arrive at the castle, it never held so much meaning. This was of his own doing, his own volition, and that spoke volumes to you. He was trying to make this work in his own special way.
You don’t miss the way his thumb ghosts over your knuckles before releasing your hand, although the movement seems hesitant and troubled. “Good night, Princess,” he bids quietly, eyes looking back at the ignored book in his lap. Your heart beats with adrenaline, the chemical fueling you to step closer to him and bend down to place a kiss on his cheek. Akaashi does his best to not look surprised, but he knows that he has failed when he hears the sound of your gentle laugh.
“Good night, Keiji.”
The prince concludes right then and there that he has never heard anything more beautiful.
-
When you return to your chambers the next night, it’s hard to miss the most beautiful glass vase you’ve seen that’s sitting on your dresser. Inside stands a half-bloomed peony, a flower you recognize from the castle gardens. The petals have a tender shade of a light blush pink – if the flower-arranging lessons taught you anything, they stood for romance, compassion, and bashfulness. A neatly folded cardstock with your name stands demurely by the vase. The handwriting is strikingly familiar, and you can’t help but smile at the words neatly written inside.
To my future queen.
As you bring the flower to your nose and inhale the sweet scent, you begin to think that perhaps, you and Akaashi might just be lucky enough for love.
 -
feel free to send requests for this au! 
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the-lightning-mage · 3 years ago
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Inquisition OC as a Companion
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I’ve already made a post about some stuff about Holly, but I love the format @little-lightning-lavellan​ made, and it really made me think. The picture is my best attempt at making her on artbreeder. 
You have selected Holly Trevelyan to join your party!
Race: Human
Gender: Female
Class: Mage
Specialization: Rift mage
Background:
Holly Trevelyan is the second youngest of seven children born to Bann and Lady Trevelyan. Born in 9:12 Dragon, she is also the only mage of the family. She came into her magic when she was 12, and thus spent most of her life in the Circle. Due to the more lax nature of the Ostwick Circle, and her being from a noble family, she was able to regularly send and receive letters. The only person she ever really got letters from is her younger sibling. This caused them to be incredibly close despite the distance.
In her early years she spent most of her time studying healing magic in hopes it would help let her get out of the circle. After lots of discouragement, she ended up giving up on that dream. Instead she focused her studies on storm based magic, as she had always found rain and thunder comforting.
After reading several books, and hearing several accounts as to how much more advanced Tevinter magic could be in certain areas, she had a new goal. She decided to try to harness electrical based magic so that it could be used as an energy source. This path has led to her becoming one of the most powerful storm based mages in Thedas.
When the talks of rebellion began, she was a part of them. She hated being cooped up all the time, and she had heard horror stories of how other mages were treated. When the rebellion began, she was not so involved. She was horrified by the levels of wrathful violence some of her peers employed. She spent a lot of time helping people escape. When she herself did, she knew that the entirety of the rebellion could not be like that, and she seriously considered joining them. Instead she decided to go find her younger sibling. That choice only solidified when she heard of what happened to the Conclave.
She becomes a rift mage because that is what either a. Killed her sibling or b. Almost killed them.
Dragon Age: Inquisition
She arrives in Haven shortly before the party leaves to address the Chantry in Val Royeaux. She shows up not to necessarily join the Inquisition, but in an attempt to find out what happened to her sibling. She can be found just outside the gates near the stables arguing with Cullen, demanding information.
If the Inquisitor is human, and thus her sibling, the conversation to recruit her flows a lot more smoothly. She will then ask to be part of the Inquisition, saying she damn near had a heart attack when she thought they had died, and that they had been apart for far, far too long. If she is refused, the Inquisitor will tell her to go home. There will be a war table mission to ensure she gets there safely. If she is accepted, she rises through the ranks rather quickly due to her skill. Solas will accuse the Inquisitor of nepotism.
If the inquisitor is not human, she will get emtional, wanting to know where her sibling is. She will demand to join the Inquisition to get justice for her fallen sibling. If denied, she will join the rebel mages instead. If they are sided with, she will technically be part of the Inquisition, but not as a companion. If not, she discovers Dorian, gives him what info she has, and flees. If she is accepted, there will be a war table mission to find her sibling’s remains or something they had on them.
In Haven, she can be found near the Inquisitor’s cabin. In Skyhold she can be found in one of the unused towers near Cullen’s office. It will have fancy looking equipment for her experiments.
She can be used to gather rebel mage support.
Approval and Romance
As they are siblings, human Inquisitors will have an easier time gaining approval, but for certain situations, they will face greater disapproval than non-humans. For example, non-humans will get “Holly disapproves” if they conscript the mages instead of treating them as allies, but humans will get “Holly greatly disapproves.”
When it comes to the big decisions, like what to do with the Wardens, who goes into the Well of Sorrows, etc. She tends to take in all of the “what ifs?” and bases her own opinions on that rather than her own morals. She may not like a decision, but if she thinks it will ultimately have the best out come, that is the one she goes with.
She likes to view most things from every angle she can. She prefers more merciful forms of justice, and can tend to be very forgiving. She likes it when the Inquisitor tries their best to understand others, while not necessarily condoning their actions. She likes it when they help those in need, though not as much as Cole does.
She can only be romanced by non human Inquisitors for obvious reasons, and she can be romanced by both men and women. If neither she or Cullen are romanced, they will end up in a relationship together. Instead of having a big romance scene, at high levels of approval, human Inquisitors will get an emotional scene where she tells them just how much she was worried about them.
Her personal quest involves her closest friend from the Circle. He sends her a letter telling her that he alive, and would love to catch up. It turns out to be a ploy, as he betrays her. He can be killed or talked down and shown mercy.
Her romance quest involves taking her to a few different locations throughout Orlais and Ferelden.
Trespasser
High Approval: She stayed with the Inquisition over the last to years as their advisor on matters of the Arcane. She presents them a unique weapon she had been working on in free time. Romance does not change this.
Low Approval if Cullen was romanced: She spent the last two years traveling. Seeing the world she never could see before. She helps and sends word back to the Inquisition when need be.
Low Approval if Cullen was not romanced: She remains with the Inquisition, helping where she can. She spends a lot of time helping Cullen figure out how to best utilize the mages.
Post trespasser: She spends much of her time working, and when she is able to get a working prototype she presents it to whatever Mage authority there is, and gets funding. It helps propel mages into good opinion. Details about her relationship are shared.
Combat Comments
Killing an enemy:
“Block this!”
“Eat ash!”
“You shouldn’t have underestimated me!”
Low health:
“Do we have another healer?”
“Armor failed me.”
“Help!”
Low health Inquisitor and Companions:
“Inquisitor!”
“Brother/Sister!”
“I’m on my way Dorian.”
“Maker, someone help the Seeker.”
“I’ve got you, Varric.”
“Shit... Bull!”
“Cole’s down!”
Other
Approaching camp: “I’ve always want to go camping.” “I’m not expert, but this seems like a lovely place to stop?”
Approaching a High Dragon: “Are they really that big?”
Using an ocularum for the first time: “Are you sure you don’t want me to examine it first?”
Picking up shards after finding the temple: “What are these doing all the way out here?”
Location Comments
Arbor Wilds: “It’s a shame we have to fight here.”
Old Crestwood: “No wonder they’re having problems with undead. Look at all the spirits.” “I think I’m going to be sick.”
Emerald Graves: “Am I the only one who thinks this place is beautiful?” “Wow....”
Emprise du Lion: “This... this is why I wear a cloak.” “I should summon some lightning. Start a fire and destroy the red lyrium. Two birds with one stone.”
Exalted Plains: “They really could not think of a worse name.” “A place that is a monument to humanity’s evil taken over by demons. Ironic.”
The Fallow Mire: “Ugh.” “I think I saw a bug the size of my hand.” “I love nature, but I hate this place.”
Forbidden Oasis: “This place would be nice if it weren’t for the Venatori... and the giant.” “I’m confused. Why is they’re a temple here? Who built it?”
Hinterlands: “Can we visit Redcliffe?” “So much chaos....” “We can help the people here, right?”
Hissing Wastes: “How do I have sand in my armor?” “Dwarven ruins on the surface? This is a dream come true.” “Great. Venatori.”
Storm Coast: “Crossing the Waking Sea was my favorite part of getting here.” “I actually quite like the weather.” “I wonder... is this place more prone to lightning storms?”
Western Approach: “Talk about a wasteland.” “Poison hot springs and chasms into the Deep Roads? At least there are ruins.” “I suppose this is a good place for nefarious deeds.”
Advisor and Companion comments
Blackwall: “She’s very dedicated and has a good heart. She’s what people should think of when they hear “mage.””
Cassandra: “She is very dedicated to the cause, though I worry she might set fire to Skyhold with one of her... experiments.”
Cole: “Trapped. Walled in. Caged like a fancy bird. Not anymore, but she stays because she wants to help. Is helping. She’s good, like her healing spells.”
Cullen: “She’s dedicated, clever, and very, very persistent. She’s been a great help with the mages.”
If in a relationship with her: “She’s... amazing, isn’t she? I’m not sure what she sees in me.”
Dorian: “You don’t find many people so open to new ideas, or people that are that accepting. She is excellent company.”
Iron Bull: “She’s different from the other mages. Too entrenched in her work to boast about it. Way more practical. I have a lot of respect for what she’s trying to do.”
Josephine: “Though I wish we could make better use of her noble ties. She is invaluable, and holds great conversations.”
Leliana: “It’s not often you meet someone who has truly nothing to hide.”
Sera: “I dunno. She makes too much sense for a mage, ya know? At least she’s pretty.”
Solas: “Holly? Ah. We don’t particularly get along, but I approve of what she is trying to do, and has accomplished.”
Varric: “You wouldn’t guess it, but Bookworm is just as good in battle as she is in that tower of hers. Thank the maker it takes a lot to piss her off. I don’t want to be on the receiving end of one of her lightning bolts.”
Vivienne: “I’ll be honest, I do not agree with her on everything, but at least she is loyal. Her work ethic is to be admired as well. She dresses rather simply though.”
Trivia
At first, everyone thinks Holly is the nickname Varric gave her. It doesn’t match her personality.
While she may not believe Dorian about the time magic, she immediately believes him and Felix about the Venatori. She had heard rumors about them before the events of Hushed Whispers, but nothing concrete enough to tell anyone.
Her relationship with Cullen starts with him asking her if she can soothe headaches. She has somewhat of a reputation for her healing magic, even if she doesn’t use it much.
She is an excellent singer.
Like Solas and Varric, she acts like a parent towards Cole.
If the Inquisitor is a human man who romances Dorian, she’ll tease him for having a type.
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randomnumbers751650 · 4 years ago
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Sometimes people ask a thing like “how did it get so big?” This is almost like any meme in the internet and sometimes even whatever is in the Top 10 bestselling books of any list. Due to being a historian of economic thought, I’m study the ascension of the idea of the entrepreneur as a hero, how it happened and its consequences, both good and bad. Therefore, I couldn’t avoid Ayn Rand and Atlas Shrugged. It wasn’t a good experience and I’ll talk more about it under the cut.
I think we all know how much of a controversial person Ayn Rand was. But it worked. She’s one of the most influential writers of the 20th century whether we like it or not. Like, a lot of people say she hates the poor and minorities. It’s even a meme, like there’s a joke SCP that makes everything it comes into contact unnecessarily verbose and one of the incidents was a sticky note written “I hate poor people” that becomes a copy of Atlas Shrugged.
After reading her work, I can safely say these are traps she set up in her own work. Not only that, these traps hide the true problems of her work.
In first place, we need to consider her demographic target. That wasn’t me, if I wasn’t researching, I wouldn’t even bother reading it. Like, I remember I saw in the internet a game called “The Jihad to Destroy Barney” and someone commenting: “because 20-years old thinking they’re funny were obviously the demographic target of Barney the Dinosaur”. Rand knew what her demographic target was, after working in Hollywood for so many years.
One might think that her demographic target was people like her, but it’s wider than that. Through all her book, producers (she doesn’t use the word ‘entrepreneur’, but it’s obviously the same) are the protagonists. Dagny shows her dedication to her railway, always looking for ways to improve it, to hire the best people to work with her, to deliver the best product she can, always treating others with respect. All the producers are people full of passion for what they do. They do not just for the money, they do it to express themselves (but still want/should be paid).
Meanwhile their enemies are the government organs that want to curb them, by introducing legislation to make everything equal, like people are forbidden to be fired, prices are controlled and so on. And they are evil, they are hypocrites who don’t really believe in the altruistic values they spouse or they are too dumb to realize they’re being hypocrites. They are always men in position of power, evil bureaucrats, quisling industrialists, hypocrite union leaders (though the union leader, Fred Kinnan, interestingly is the most sympathetic of the villains, and actually gets away scot free, to the point some think he’s a Galt agent undercover).
Rand aimed for the real life entrepreneur identify with the “heroes”. All the companies have names of their founders in their titles, Taggart Terminal, d’Anconia Copper, and so on. Their enemies show their true faces by naming themselves with abstract titles, like National Union and so on. She aimed the person who ever had to deal with the Health Department, with the Labor Department, who has to fills forms and more forms and say “Wouldn’t the world be a terrible place if it wasn’t for you? Wouldn’t it be wonderful if you didn’t have to do all of this? If you just had the opportunity to truly express yourself? Free from the prying eyes of government inspectors? Rejoice, because I have the answer!”
Rand answers this with the Galt’s Gulch – a utopia of freedom, where the word “give” is taboo, while leaving the outside world of looters and moochers to destroy itself. All the producers are gathered to escape the terrible collectivist world around her. Everyone has money and, since they’re all enlightened by the principles of greed and selfishness, the prices are small, even symbolic. Monopolies are good and rivals are always being taken down, and they rejoice with it, both winner and loser, because they contributed to the expansion of human spirit.
When John Galt says “I swear – by my life and my love of it – that I will never live for the sake of another man, nor ask another man to live for mine”, he’s implying all men who belong to this valley. They are not ashamed of taking low jobs, because they know their true power is what they do with their minds and hands. Francisco is shown to be perfect in everything he does, makes one think he’s a Gary Stu, but it’s because, according to the book’s philosophy, if you’re a true man, anything you do you become the best. For this reason, Galt’s Gulch is quite diverse, because it has not only industrialists, but also factory workers and small businessmen who share their ideals. And not only workers, but also artists, intellectuals and others.
This is why I think the argument “this books hates poor people” might not be accurate. The low worker whom Eddie Willers meets in the beginning is actually John Galt in disguise. This I think it’s the most important part to understand why Atlas Shrugged was so influential with small businessmen when published: John Galt is where the Übermensch and the Everyman meet. “Who is John Galt?” Anyone can be John Galt – the same way anyone can be Bella Swan, anyone can be Ritsuka Fujimaru (at least before the 5th singularity), anyone can be Kirito Kirigaya – the idealized self of the entrepreneur.
Thus, one is not born a “man”, but becomes one. Dagny and Hank’s entire character development is to become “men”, to learn to love themselves more than what they create, no matter how passionate they are. This contrasts with Eddie Willers, Dagny’s right hand man, probably the most tragic character of the tale.
Eddie loved the railway just as Dagny. He’s been her friend for so long, and even developed feelings for her. But the book constantly observes that Eddy doesn’t have the capacity to lead something as important as a railway. But he does it nevertheless, dedicating all his resources and passion for the railway. But, unlike Dagny, he doesn’t learn to look for greater things. Thus, he ends the novel stuck in a railway, defeated and probably left to die.
This is controversial, so much everyone still discusses his fate. In the movie adaptation, they deviate from the novel by having the heroes making a point to rescue him from his fate. In Jennifer Burns’s biography, she mentions a letter Ayn Rand received asking about Eddie and she replies that in a collectivist society, Eddie would’ve perished, while in a free one he’d be living okay. Nevertheless, this reveals a truth about that world: not everyone will become a “man”. Eddie would never become a “man”.
Since pity is against Galt’s doctrine, Eddie cannot be pitied. He has to live under the mercy of his Galtian overlords. He has only two options: either worship the feet that trample him, expecting his breadcrumbs fall from their banquet table, or to question his place in the world, thus denying that A is A, and be trampled harder. It really doesn’t matter his kindness, his dedication, he’s not a “man”, and thus has more in common with the looters and moochers than the heroes. Thus, if Eddie ever becomes an obstacle to the productive forces, even if unintentionally, he has to be trampled.
While one might think that I’m being unfair, it should be reminded that Ayn Rand openly advocated the people who were killing Natives during the American expansion to the West were doing nothing wrong. The Natives were actually privileged for being trampled by the productive forces, thus creating the great nation. The same argument can be made for the colonized people and even to the “essential workers” of this pandemic – since apparently people who take this book seriously are one of the most resistant forces to lockdowns and mask mandates, you can guess why.
And this is why Rand hated the environmental movement, because it puts an obstacle to the productive process. Nature can only react with deaf indifference to Galt’s speech. For Rand, this is unforgivable. Would it be surprising if oil tycoons were fans of Rand’s work?
In the end, the producers execute their revenge against the world that rejected them. Galt’s speech caused a lot of disturbance and the last chapters deal with its consequences, with more villains being evil for no reason and more showing how awesome their heroes are. Galt becomes more and more like Jesus, even with a gnostic Judas in Dagny helping him. In fact, in the funniest part of the book, where it comes THIS close from being self-aware, he says to his tormenters, when they asked to cooperate with him: “It took me three hours on the radio to tell me why”. It gave me angry laughter.
In the end of the day, what matters? This is a work of fiction, where caricatures of men and women fight each other. The entrepreneurial process works nothing like described in the book. It takes a naïve view of selfishness, upon saying that if everyone was selfish the world would be a better place, when in reality, if you expect selfishness, it’s what you’ll get.
It’s never explained how they invented their inventions, only that they did it and it’s awesome. The One-Man Industrial Revolution trope is one that I loathe a lot, because it misrepresents the innovation process. It requires so many factors, including government funding – scratch that, it REQUIRES government funding because technologies like touch-screen used to be so risky that no private company would take seriously and government can fund because it doesn’t go bankrupt the same way. Even if we take it as a metaphor, it doesn’t work when you stop to think.
Rand belongs to the same class of writers as Stephenie Meyer and Christian Weston Chandler. But she wanted to influence the world, she wanted it to be more than entertainement, much more. Thanks to her publishing network and appeal to real problems, she did it. This is why the problems of her work require critique. And I hope anyone reading this try to understand better what “relatability” means, this is what relatability can do. Stop trying to look for relatability everywhere, let it just come naturally and if it doesn’t come enjoy the story!
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ks-caster · 4 years ago
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The 100 7x10 - Impressions
Not a proper liveblog because I skipped watching it in real time (oopsie!)
Is there like a particular reason why everyone sees the dude covered in blood - who they know was a powerful scary person - and they leave the 12-year-old child alone with him? Instead of, idk, someone grabbing her hand when they’re all running out behind her back? Like any reasonable adults would do in that scenario?
The three most dangerous women on this or any planet - YAS QUEENS
So weird how a verse in an alien language rhymes when translated into English...
Fuck yeah Echo! Stab stab those are my terms!
Octavia knew they’d turn up - of course they would lol. Dangerous foreign planet, genocidal maniac, eventually Clarke Griffin will show up. That’s just the laws of like, plot physics or something.
Hope looks super cool in the guard uniform with the haircut and the eyebrows...
Every war is the last. Until the next one. You tell him, Niylah.
Right before they cut off her drinking water to water the lawns of the rich... We were robbed of more Gabriel-Diyoza interactions on the basis of eat the rich. That little “she was a freedom fighter” comment wasn’t enough.
Cadogan really thinks he’s running the Jedi religion. Seriously. And I hate it. I actually like Jedi - even if they’re kinda’ misguided/
I really feel like Gabriel doesn’t actually know how to do the whole hostage thing...
So I’ve seen the gifs - and therefore I know that for the scene Levitt has to stay tied up. But... Clarke saying not to untie him because they need to know what Echo is planning makes no damn sense? He can talk and get untied at the same time. And clearly Octavia is close to him and he cares about her (her body language, his immediate apologies, she knows where his bedroom is in the first place). 
If you’re looking for the wrong answer, it’s easy to miss the right one. Ain’t that the truth. Antivaxxers, antimaskers...
I couldn’t even laugh at Malachai’s fuckin’ cliche name, I was too busy laughing at his new extensions and his “I’m 25 and angry at the world” goth-punk outfit bahahaha (I’m not saying I wouldn’t wear it or that it isn’t a bitchin’ outfit - it just looked so out of place and was so sudden lol! Did Russell have that stuff in his closet somewhere? Like for halloween?)
YOU SAY YOU HONOR OUR TRADITIONS, SO HONOR THIS ONE. YOUR PATH TO THE THRONE LEADS THROUGH ME - SINGLE COMBAT! Boss. Ass. Bitch.
And where’d he get that fancy-ass sword? It’s not like anyone had time to pack or anything before they left earth, if they even had time to oack before leaving for the bunker...?
Did Madi... take his whole eye? Noice! But also... are people allowed to survive the conclave? Wasn’t that the whole plot and the reason why nightblood was genetically rare and the world fucking ended like it did? Both Indra (the challenger) and Madi (who I think illegally interfered) are alive. So I cannot respect or fear Sheidheda as a villain. :-/ 
Hiding everyone in the reactor... Now THAT’S a survivor’s move. :-3
Raven says CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT RIGHTS and I think that’s very sexy of her
Anders: Raised in the wild, slaves to their feelings... you disgust me. What are you, cheap knockoff Vulcans? Miller: Bold words for a man standing in front of a pack of armed beasts. Hell yeah!
Diyoza... Idk if it was the music or the filming or what but her death scene felt off. Just... cheap, Idk. I was all prepared to be super upset and probably cry (I love her so much!) but I was just kind of... taken out of it by the presentation.) Anybody else have that experience?
Trailer: Next Up, Bellamy Alone!
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deviant3lover · 5 years ago
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Personal Headcanons for the Trio
On a rare spark of inspiration, I’ve decided to compile my list of headcanons for the Trio for you all to look at if you’re interested. :) 
I tried my best to make them rooted in canon so that they may be plausible while still allowing me to indulge. ;)
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Putting this under Read More because boy, it is long.
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Metal Bat/Badd
- From my asks to @atinychai​, Badd likes traditionally masculine things because it makes him feel empowered and keeps most people away. He shows almost all the traits: being into sports, working out, being fierce and intimidating… all except for being attracted to women. (Came as a real shock to him too: his team often found girls cute but Badd couldn’t help but notice that some guys were pretty hot and nobody pointed it out. Doubly so because he loves the thought of being married one day and none of the ladies appealed to him.)
- Very straightforward thinker, but unlike Genos, he isn’t completely tactless or over the top with it. His thought process focuses on what needs to be done, what is needed to do it, and to do it ASAP. Considerations are taken into account, such as what would happen if he doesn’t do it right or in a certain way. This is especially good for him since he’s a busy guy even by S-Class standards, but it does leave him vulnerable to not thinking through long term plans that well.
- The most empathetic and physically affectionate of the three. He keeps his tough look on him in public and in private, but he’s one of the first people to offer to hug it out if you’re breaking down. 
(Obviously where no one can see it: that’s embarrassing on you and would attract too much unwanted attention to him, so he makes sure there’s no one watching. If there is, he’ll clap you on the shoulder, look you in the eye, and offer some advice and encouragement.) 
Young boys and teenagers look up to him, and they usually feel better about crying into his shirt when Badd tells them how hard it was to stop himself from bursting into tears at his first loss in a match, or when he was trying to keep quiet for Zenko’s sake at her recital.
- Continuing on that note, he keeps a nice relationship with some of his sporty fans. Not anything too intensive, but he’ll keep track of the boys who come to him asking him what he was like on his baseball team, what to do if there’s infighting in their group, which ones are worried about their baseball matches and he gives them a proud congrats if they win, or a consolation + inspiration to do better next time if they lost.
- When he’s not blinded by anger, Badd’s surprisingly pretty adept at being a social expert. His experiences of being on the baseball team + hanging out with problem students like him has given Badd a pretty good perspective on both the popular kids and the hated, loner kids, as well as what they’re going through. As a result, he’s usually well received by them. Feels a little embarrassed and uncomfortable around smart kids though, especially when they explain something that sounds a little complicated to him.
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- Back in his younger days prior to all the responsibilities piled on top of him, Badd was a pretty good leader for his baseball team. He checked in regularly with his team mates, their equipment, their training regimens, and their upcoming opponents. He helped some of his team mates with confidence issues, and made sure to keep in check with how they’re doing to prevent in-team fighting. All-star baseball team in their region for sure. :3
- In the future, I imagine that Badd might take up some boxing after taking a hint from all the times monsters knocked his bat out of his hands away from him. Lost his weapon? He’ll use his fists until he can get it back again, and he’ll use them well. Turns out loves the sport, but baseball will always have a special place in his heart.
- He empathizes easily with people experiencing stress; he goes through that daily with everything he has to take care of- but he’s more clueless with issues such as mental illness. Badd’s a little insensitive about it, sometimes suggesting things to take care of it which don’t work, but he’s trying his best to understand what someone is going through and knows enough to know that it isn’t something that can’t be solved by blowing off steam or cutting off some bad things in your life. Gets pissed off if someone dismisses it as ‘something that’s all in their head’ or ‘they’re crazy’ and will confront them. Forcing apologies out of the offender isn’t out of the question. Might want to stop him before he gets too pissed off.
- Like you’d expect, he’s a pretty big fan of sports, but in a more casual way. He likes hearing about his favorite athletes, training regimens, and certain meals/diets that helped stars to build up/maintain their strength and skill, but doesn’t obsessively get himself involved in the subject. On a more sentimental note, Badd finds some solace with famous athletes because they had to work hard to get where they needed to be, and on top of that, have to deal with the pressures that come with their popularity; whether they like it or not.
- Despite not having much time to cultivate attention to honing his skill and interest in cooking, he loves Gordon Ramsay. Seeing him rip entitled, spoiled people apart with words alone and gently encouraging + teaching kids has him placed high on Badd’s list of celebrities that he respects.
- Badd is a Closeted Romantic and a Family Man. Always found it touching where in some old action/thriller films, the male married lead thinks about his wife and kids back home and tells himself that he shouldn’t die, powering through the pain/adversity to get back to them. At some point it shifted to him liking some intense drama/action movie focusing on romance where the couple race against time to get to each other before it’s too late. The idea that someone you love and treat as an equal might actually be gone forever really gets him, and if done right, he’ll cry.
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- Cannot, for the love of him, focus well on books. He’s literate, but he always wants to get to the most important stuff, often skimming over details that might be important later on. This is also evident in how he writes, explaining something simply and to the point, which makes him pretty good at teaching kids basic, simplified concepts, but not so good at constructing incredibly thought out and nuanced writing. Books and audio books just aren’t immersive to him. Consequently, English is one of his worst subjects in school, and he often has to rely on online notes and essay examples to help him out.
- Extending on that, I imagine him to be a kinaesthetic/visual learner. He was born with amazing dynamic vision after all. (Under ‘Fighting Style: Keen Perception.’)
- Loves American action movies, but they’ll have to be really well made for him to remember a specific one. If you asked him about his favorite action scenes, he’ll describe it, but more often than not, he won’t remember the movie’s name unless you gave him some clues.
- (Inspired by this fanfic.) His mother died in a monster attack just moments after giving birth to Zenko. Badd used to love and respect his father, but her death lead to him spiraling down to alcohol abuse and neglect due to his grief, leading to his broken pedestal status in his son’s eyes. Badd’s still bitter over it when he thinks about it, saying that his ‘old man nursed his bottle like it was his new kid’ instead of being there for him and Zenko. Caught between poor grades in school, a rough home life, and a baby sister he didn’t know how to take care of, Badd had to convince himself that he needed to be twice the man his father is, and ever was, to get through the worst of what life had to throw at him.
- No matter how hard he tries, he still loves his father, and wants to see him endeavor to become better again. But the combined grief of seeing him crumble and give up on himself, the bitterness over his dad failing to be there for him when he needed it the most, and the anger over how seemingly self-absorbed he was in with his booze and watching the static on the TV when Badd was struggling to cope, makes him force the thought of reconciling out of his mind. Badd forces himself to be outwardly angry over what happened to avoid the conflicted feelings he has over the man he used to see as his hero.
- That being said, if you know what his father used to mean to him, you’ll see subtle signs that while Badd can’t forgive, he had never forgotten him. His father was a big sports fan too, and taught him how to properly hit a baseball. If you knew what he taught and looked closely when Badd fights or does some swings, you’ll see that the tips and tricks that he taught his son has never left him.
- Wanted to get a dog because he thought they were cool, but realized he wouldn’t have enough time for it. Begrudgingly got a cat for him and Zenko after she picked one out. He expected it to be the widespread stereotype for cats: cold, mean, and ruins your stuff… and then he saw how lovable and sweet it was and fell in love. That cat is Tama.
- Hates horror films because some of them remind him of the fact that monsters can manifest for the stupidest reasons, anywhere, anytime. It gets him worked up and restless because anything can happen, and the fact that some monsters in the past had tried to target Zenko to lure him out doesn’t make him feel any better.
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- When he’s sick/injured, he sleeps. A lot. A very heavy sleeper; expect snores and heavy eyelids. Seriously, this guy is practically stuck in either Stage 4 NREM or REM sleep until severe injuries heal quite a bit, and germs making him sick are killed off.
- Does not take kindly to anyone calling him weak or stupid. Despite getting angry easily, he’s very resilient (emotionally and mentally.) He knows from experience that if he can’t resolve it quickly, it’s best to put it on the backburner until the opportunity arrives where he can, and does his best to blow off steam in the meantime. He’s not that smart academically and he knows it, but it’s still a berserk button you should stay away from because while he’ll never admit it, it hurts him to know that despite forcing himself to attend school so that he can build a future for himself and Zenko outside of hero work, he’s still failing at getting the grades he needs.
- Expanding on that, he’s smart, but it’s more akin to Saitama’s words of wisdom than eloquent, polished reasoning and beliefs; straightforward and inspiring in a simple way that leaves no room for misinterpretation.
- Don’t let him play video games. Especially rage inducing ones like Cuphead. He will crush the controller and wonder why his character isn’t responding mid-game. The keys on the keyboard are smashed in. There are cracks on the area around the buttons. There’s a Wii remote sticking out of a wall after a frustrating defeat and the wrist strap wasn’t securely fastened.
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Garou
- He likes athletic wear better than punk styles. They’re easier to put on and move in, whilst the leather from some punk clothes heats up too much/gets too stiff for his liking.
 - Hates being restrained. Sometimes, on a very, very rare occasion, it can be interpreted as him being scared of the idea since he lashes out pretty angrily at it. Garou had been held down and beaten up by bullies twice, pinned against a tree and choked by Genos before escaping his blast by the skin of his teeth, and then was implied to be chained up and tortured/punished for his insolence against the MA in their torture room. He’s strong enough to escape most bindings, but he will be on edge if he feels like he can’t get out of them. If you play your cards right, his attack patterns will lack their usual cunning and be more animalistic.
- He’ll eat almost any kind of food except for sweets. It’s too sugary for him, leads to a crash later on, isn’t sustainable, and it doesn’t offer much nutritional value to him either, so he steers clear of them if he can help it. The odd exception are energy drinks. The sugary taste isn’t something he exactly likes, but Garou loves the immediate rush that kicks in soon after drinking them; the slight burn on his tongue from carbonated drinks such as coca cola is a plus.
- Loves the thrill of the challenge of almost any sort. The excitement comes from giving it his all and not knowing for sure how things will turn out; if he won, that’s another trophy to him. If he lost, he relishes in a milestone he has to beat and loves the idea that there’s still room for improvement. Winning or losing too much tends to be boring for him, and he’ll abandon it if he sees no way to rectify it.
- When he’s sick or injured, he’s a restless sleeper; it’s hard for him to get the proper hours that he needs. He drifts in and out of sleeping and waking, usually sleeping a few hours at best before waking up for 10 minutes and falling back to sleep. Being attacked while vulnerable, in places with little means of defense or shelter is a pretty good plan for monsters/bigshots who want his head and he knows it. One of the places he can sleep more peacefully at is Bang’s Dojo, but he hasn’t been back there for some time now.
- Tsundere. Not necessarily the blushy ‘I-it’s not like I like you, b-baka!!’ sort of way, but he’s a more subdued tsundere. He’ll come off as mean spirited at times, but the most reliable way of knowing he loves and cares about his loved ones is when they’re being threatened; he’ll rough up the threat so they won’t get any funny ideas in the future.
- Is Russian-French, with some (suspected) Norwegian in there. Is generally a European mutt who takes a keen interest in Asian culture, especially those that developed sick martial arts and/or those who have interesting, complex histories; however, Garou isn’t as interested in wars and political intrigue as he is in weird, clever, and hilarious events and hijinks that sound too surreal to be true… like Zhao Yun's army being outnumbered by the enemy, retreating, and him choosing to make their fortress look empty so that his enemies get suspicious, thinking that it was an ambush and withdrawing... before launching an attack on them, killing off his enemy's army by inciting chaos. (E.g. Some of them got trampled, others fell into a river and drowned.) He won.
- Continuing off of that, he generally regards European history with distaste due to how... unkind, some of them are.
- (God, I love @the-goddessfighter​‘s headcanons for Garou’s parents, so honestly? I’m all for this being 100% canon. Murata or ONE, make it happen. In my eyes, this is as good as you possibly can get with Garou’s backstory.)
Check out her tumblr for her OC’s for Garou’s parents! (Although I do headcanon Toru as a more neglectful father who didn’t care much for Garou, if at all. He didn’t sugarcoat his words to him nor try to comfort his son.)
- Prefers black/white/grey/neutral colors for his clothes, if only to avoid people saying that the colors clash and that he looks like a fashion disaster.
- It’s an unconscious move on his part, and while he usually has impeccable control over his power, sometimes his fingers feel like they’re jabbing you when he’s distracted. Especially when he grabs or hugs you. Sometimes, there are some small bruises where they’ve dug in a little forcefully. When he’s feeling affectionate or sentimental and you’re his lover, he traces over your skin, and it’s a contrasting mix between the calloused, rough textures from the fingers, and smooth, fluid movements that slide like water. It’s a distinct Garou feature, and whether you love it or hate it depends on your tastes.
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Genos/Demon Cyborg
- Doesn’t care too much about his popularity, but acknowledges the work that his fans put in when it comes to promoting his work and what little information he shares that others will pick up on. E.g. He doesn’t like to be bothered when he’s busy/with that bald guy, but otherwise is OK with signing a few autographs and shaking hands, he avoids certain obnoxious fangirls, he hates it when there’s a group and they crowd him, etc.
- Despite appreciating this info circulating so that some fans are more mindful about how they interact with him, he’s one of the hardest heroes to connect with due to how cold, closed off, busy, and/or socially awkward he may be. Not that many of his fans mind, as it feeds into the mysterious ‘Cyborg Prince’ fantasy that’s popular in his fan base.
- Thinks that Nice Guys/GirlsTM and people who use ‘I’m an Alpha, those betas/omegas can suck it’ are pathetic. At best. He thinks that they’re compensating for something instead of actually trying to improve themselves: for the latter, the added weight of using a disproved scientific theory makes him lose respect for them even more.
- He has a certain amount of fondness for fauna and flora. Prior to meeting Saitama, he’s had to travel long distances in search of the Mad Cyborg, and more often than not, company is fleeting, leaving him alone most of the time. Flowers by the side of the path, blue skies, the sound of chirping birds, or even some berries with rainwater droplets on them are familiar, nice sights that put him at ease. Some of his notebooks outside of taking notes on Saitama have hand drawn illustrations and notes on some plants he’s encountered, as well as their various uses.
- Conversely, barren cities will put him on high alert. Buildings act as great hiding spots, and Genos isn’t a stranger to being ambushed by monsters and criminals alike. (His eyes can be a great asset in these situations; scanning for threats and movements can give him a heads up on how dangerous the area is.)
- His sense of humor is pretty dark, if not outright sadistic at times; especially towards the people he hates. Otherwise, he likes making (mostly. Key word is mostly) harmless jabs and teases at those he loves because he finds it funny when the other person gets riled up/flustered. His tone and expressions don’t change (most of the time) when he makes them though, making it hard for others to know whether or not he’s joking until he clarifies on the matter.
- Hates those who spread misinformation about medicine, or demonizes scientists. He cares about keeping the public safe, and admires/respects science for everything it’s discovered for the sake of humanity: people such as those are a direct attack on both.
- Though on the outside he takes even the most inconsequential things seriously, to the point where he’s gullible and too honest to lie, he keeps his more solemn thoughts to himself and ingrains them at the back of his mind so that he’ll never forget them. His notebooks don’t hint at them even existing. The only way you’ll ever get to hear them is when you directly attack something he holds very dear to him (beliefs, values, aspirations) so that he may fiercely (and furiously) defend them. He berated Saitama for seemingly making a joke at his expense, but he was somewhat more lenient since he knew that Saitama wielded the power he needed. He won’t be nearly as nice if you’re not someone he likes or respects, so it’s a sure-fire way to get onto his blacklist.
- Is German-Japanese. German father, Japanese mother, though a lot of people mistake him for being fully German thanks to his looks. He understands some parts of the language, but isn’t fluent in speaking it. Japanese he’s fully fluent in, and English is getting to that point as well.
- He doesn’t usually use pet names if he gets a lover, but if he’s fallen in love hard, they get sort of ridiculous and a little cheesy. ‘My beloved’ and ‘darling’ are the most modest ones, but you’ll have to stop him from going after extremely specific and loving nicknames because they blur the line between being hilarious and embarrassing.
- Awesome at stake outs, and often keeps a first aid kit handy in his temporary bases (in the case of civilian injury) alongside a repair kit for himself. Genos is incredibly well prepared just from the equipment he has inside them, but unlike other matters (such as learning how to fold clothes efficiently and going taking it far too seriously), Genos shows pretty good judgment in how he sets them up. He doesn’t take more than what’s needed, and prepares some emergency supplies just in case there’s a new development and he needs to stay a bit longer. He’s learned from experience that taking too many things for them makes it harder for him to clear his tracks, and in return, the enemy (or enemies) that he’s been keeping an eye on might catch onto the fact that they’re being watched, making it harder for him to discover new information.
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Shared Traits & Other Bits
- The no-brainer: you will get intimidated into fleeing if you mess with them. Things may get physical if you target their family/loved ones. Injuries vary depending on level of apologetic attitude, how much of a threat you pose, how far you’ve pushed things, etc. Best case scenario is that you flee the scene with no injuries, but scared out of your mind.
- Badd and Genos use the same nickname for their lover: ‘Darling.’ Although Badd will say it as ‘Darlin’’ instead. Other than that, their nicknames are fairly different, with Badd going for things such as ‘sweet cheeks,’ ‘babe,’ and ‘sweetheart.’
- Both Genos and Garou have the tendency to mess with people for their own amusement. Garou comes in the form of taunting and goading, whilst Genos likes to make underhanded comments and jokes that will infuriate you.
- Genos and Garou like books. Genos however, is more introverted and will share his knowledge more thoroughly when prompted by someone who needs it. Garou being Garou, you wouldn’t even know he was into reading until he offhandedly mentions a bit of knowledge from a book he read. Odds are you won’t have time to ask him if he knows how to do x because he would have already gotten up to do it before you can open your mouth. This occurrence is far more common in emergencies.
- Genos doesn’t take any visible joy in fighting. He sees monsters as a threat to society that must be eliminated quickly and effectively. Badd used to enjoy throwing himself into battles and coming out of them victorious, but thanks to time and HA’s obligations, he sees monsters as destructive assholes getting in his way and creating more work for him when he’d rather come home to catch up on other things on the forefront of his mind. Garou loves fighting, the challenge- but it has diminished by a notable amount after his webcomic arc as he’s reflecting on what he needs and wants to do now. Despite this, he usually keeps his eye out for any interesting challenges, if only to distract himself.
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- Slightly digressing from the Trio: Zenko shares the burden of taking on responsibilities with Badd, though he doesn’t know they exist. She’s aware of the fact that her brother isn’t living a normal teenage life and is bothered by the fact that he can’t act like his own age most of the time, making her want to be headstrong, capable, and independent soon so he doesn’t have to worry about her. At the same time, she knows that there aren’t many heroes his age that he can get along with, so she tries to fill in that hole by spending time with him while finding heroes she likes, and hopefully her brother will like- the reason being is that hopefully, Badd will make friends with them, and she can meet her idol often! It’s part of the reason why she was so insistent in having him obtain AM’s signature.
- Genos can sing, but sometimes struggles with singing with enough emotion in his lyrics. Garou can sing pretty well, (and sings almost every Disney villain song like a champ) but he’d be resistant to others goading him into it. He’s pretty uncomfortable at the notion that he’d have to sing in front of people. Badd can… sing, but he’s best at singing the lullabies he sung to a baby Zenko- songs that get him into it can have him be really, really into it; to the point where it’s almost embarrassing to watch. He’s pretty good at rap/singing more sentimental pieces such as this:
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disconnecteddots · 4 years ago
Text
Notes on Nathan Robinson's Response to J.K. Rowling  - The Bathroom Debate
Because of my great respect for his other writing, I have taken particular interest in the response of Nathan Robinson of Current Affairs to the recent J.K. Rowling controversy, entitled "J.K. Rowling and the Limits of Imagination". The essay is a polemical attack on her views and character, calling her a transphobic bigot.
I will mostly be using the traditional definitions of "woman" and "man" in this response ("adult human female" etc.), except when denoting otherwise using the adjective "trans".
Here are some of my thoughts, mostly on bathrooms and changing rooms.
The subtitle reads:
The creator of Harry Potter could imagine the most marvelous fictional universe in children’s literature—yet she can’t imagine the inner lives of transgender people or the radical expansion of political possibilities.
This is a very helpful sentence contradicting the idea that Rowling is of poor character. Yes, the ideas trans rights activists (henceforth TRAs) peddle are indeed "radical". It should come as no surprise that people have trouble imagining radical ideas. This is a common feature of radical ideas, regardless of whether they are true! Whether someone can imagine radical ideas is not very indicative of their character.
She tells the usual fear-mongering tales that conservative Republicans tell about the perils of having trans women in the bathroom:
“When you throw open the doors of bathrooms and changing rooms to any man who believes or feels he’s a woman—and, as I’ve said, gender confirmation certificates may now be granted without any need for surgery or hormones—then you open the door to any and all men who wish to come inside.”
As my colleague Brianna Rennix has written, this is ridiculous: people who wish to commit sex crimes in bathrooms do not have their gender checked at the door. A person does not have to “pass” as a woman to commit a crime in the ladies’ room, they just have to walk into the ladies’ room.
First off, note the switch from Rowling's "bathrooms and changing rooms" to just "bathrooms... the ladies' room". Changing rooms have mysteriously disappeared in Nathan's response. I have seen this dodge before. Perhaps because it's easier to defend bathrooms, where private stalls prevent voyeurism, than changing rooms, where people may change and shower in the open.
But more importantly, Nathan's retort is easy to dispute. It is very easy to think of impediments that keep men from entering women's spaces. They may be observed, noted as suspicious, and/or confronted inside the space. They may be observed, noted as suspicious, and/or confronted by observers outside the space, such as a waiter in a restaurant seeing a man enter the women's restroom. They may be asked to leave businesses or other establishments. They may suffer social consequences if word is spread of their behavior. They may be ejected by staff or police. With social and physical consequences for trespassing, it would be difficult for a man to use strategies such as repeated entry or lingering in women's spaces, useful for finding opportunities for misconduct. Seriously, what would happen if a man entered a women's changing room with twenty women in it? They'd confront him and chase him out! And all of these possible consequences also creates internal discouragement in the offender: fear. Fear can be overcome by repeated confrontation of the fear - in this case, that would be repeated intrusion into women's spaces. But that's difficult if the intrusions result in consequences.
But with explicit sanctioning of self ID as the only criterion for entry into women's spaces, none of these defensive strategies can work properly. Intruders can overcome their fears through practice. They can enter and linger as often as they like, so long as their behavior wouldn't provoke suspicion if done by a woman. They can't be ejected by staff or police until after they commit an offense, and much voyeurism won't be punishable at all - no one gets kicked out of a changing room for scanning the room. No one gets kicked out of communal showers for showering in them.
There is one remaining defense with self ID: prejudice. If trans women are still observed and noted as suspicious, that decreases the ability for men to intrude and offend. If social consequences are still imposed on trans women for using the women's bathroom, that also serves as a deterrent. But if this prejudice is eliminated in this context as TRAs desire, these defenses will be lost as well.
Does Nathan really think it's a knockdown argument that unless there's a guard at the door, or the door is locked, that that means there is no impediment to going somewhere? Sometimes I leave my front door unlocked at home. But if an intruder were to enter my home, they'd risk running into me, the police being called, etc. That's just a basic fact about life. The threat of social or physical consequences discourages people from certain behaviors even when there's no immediate obstruction to those behaviors.
On to the next quote from Nathan.
More importantly, she does not consider that her own framework for bathrooms, by wanting trans women to use the men’s room, will create the exact abuse situations that she says she is worried about—and every day instead of rarely. We have some data suggesting that forcing trans people to use the wrong bathroom increases their risk of being assaulted, which is what you’d expect. Why is the fear experienced by trans women forced to use a bathroom for the opposite gender not present in her framework? Because J.K. Rowling is transphobic, and trans women’s experiences are seen as less legitimate.
First, TRAs have a really hard time understanding that their Gender Critical opponents don't have a problem with trans people, they have a problem with men - people who fit the traditional anatomic definition of "male" or "man", regardless of how they identify. My guess is that this is because feminists of all stripes have normalized anti-male rhetoric, so to admit that GC feminists are anti-male and not transphobic would be rhetorical surrender. Rowling addresses this specifically in her essay: "Ironically, radical feminists aren’t even trans-exclusionary – they include trans men in their feminism, because they were born women," but Nathan ignores what she says. Excluding trans women but accepting trans men in the women's bathroom is best characterized as anti-male, not transphobic. And demanding that trans women not be called "men" or "male" in any context is using definitions as a manipulative tool by making it rhetorically impossible to refer to human sexual dimorphism.
Second, segregating bathrooms and changing rooms are a probabilistic measure towards reducing sexual misconduct and violence. Not all misconduct will be prevented - the goal is just to prevent some of it. Some women commit sexual or violent crimes against other women - we let them in the women's bathroom anyway. Many men don't commit sexual or violent crimes against women - they're excluded regardless, even if they're in a low risk category (e.g., gay). Men are left to fend for themselves against other men in men's bathrooms and changing rooms - even if they're weak, disabled, poor, or of a marginalized racial group. Many trans women could easily pass as men and go unnoticed in the men's room - self ID means we're not just talking about trans women who have undergone sex change operations that intrinsically draw attention. Should our efforts be devoted to reducing intramale violence and harassment in the men's room, or effectively abandoning the segregation system altogether by adopting self ID? How will the effects of self ID change over time as trans acceptance increases, reducing the social barriers to a non-trans male predator pretending to be trans as an abuse tactic? These are completely debatable questions. It is not bigoted to consider excluding some or all trans women, just as it is not bigoted to exclude gay males. Segregation systems by definition separate humans from each other based on some arbitrary criteria, and I have heard no call for generally integrating bathrooms and changing rooms into unisex spaces.
Next quote.
...in her essay she talks about the problems she sees with letting “any man who believes or feels he’s a woman” be considered a woman, which is very straightforward: she thinks many who claim to be women are not in fact women.
More subtle dishonesty from Nathan. Here's the quote he's referencing from Rowling:
When you throw open the doors of bathrooms and changing rooms to any man who believes or feels he’s a woman – and, as I’ve said, gender confirmation certificates may now be granted without any need for surgery or hormones – then you open the door to any and all men who wish to come inside. That is the simple truth.
That doesn't actually imply Nathan's "very straightforward" interpretation that "she thinks many who claim to be women are not in fact women". It just means what she says, and it is indeed a simple truth. Perhaps there are not many men dishonestly claiming to be trans women now - Rowling actually doesn't comment on that at all in that quote. Nathan just made an opinion up for her so he could trash her. But if transphobia is eliminated from society as both TRAs and Gender Critical people desire, and there is no medical or other gatekeeping preventing males from claiming to be women, then yes, any man may claim to be a woman with zero impediment. We have ample evidence from history that men will go to great lengths to commit crimes against women. So yes, we would expect voyeurism and other abuse rates in women's spaces from opportunistic male intruders to go up. Obviously. If we didn't, why would we bother having separate facilities in the first place?
Nathan’s argument also reeks of what I previously noted: that the TRAs demand that “men” and even “male” be used to refer to gender identity, and not anatomy, is a manipulative tactic to make it impossible to discuss human sexual dimorphism. Nathan writes, “She thinks many who claim to be women are not in fact women.” Trans women are often anatomically male (I’m not going to debate whether medicine can change sex or intersex people here). Being born anatomically male is why they’re trans women and not non-trans women!
I'll take a moment to note that the TRAs no longer consider gender dysphoria a condition for being trans. That is, even persons that are psychologically accepting of their conventional gender, or who could become accepting through non-transition treatments or growth, can be considered trans. So what's stopping an abusive male from saying, "hey, I would just prefer to shower with women - that sounds more pleasant than showering with men?" Nothing!
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soartfullydone · 4 years ago
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Ah, Miss Boggess, there you are. Timofey's been driving me mad. He said he's found you the most luxurious gown—I do hope you plan to contribute funds, this isn't Cresce after all—and he wanted to know what your preference in masks might be. I beg you not to be too gaudy, I refuse to be upstaged. And you know how Alderode can be when its women are too bold.
I don’t know if this is anything but oh well!
Melody squinted up at the wright who’d waltzed into her space, disturbing her work with his near-incessant chatter. Bastion was in a good mood, then, complaints about Timofey aside, which suited her because technically her space belonged to him. The entire safe house did. She had done her best to clear out the papers, books, empty wine bottles, and other assorted debris from a corner of the room and remain undisturbed while disturbing no one. That plan had mostly worked until now.
Mercifully, when she met Bastion’s black gaze, he was clothed this time. As ever, he wore that same silver torc she never saw him without and was swathed in black. The v-neck cut of his shirt extended all the way down to his naval, which was downright modest of him even if she did get an eyeful, sitting on the floor as she was. He towered over her as he braced a forearm against the wall in a casual lean, intent on having her answer. 
With a sigh, she lowered her writing instrument and, bypassing his comments entirely, extended the papers she was working on toward him, all business. “Here.” 
On each page’s surface was a series of facial composite sketches. She’d drawn every Ald and Sharte who’d been on that beach when the cache of First Silver was stolen to the best of her memory. Had done similarly for nearly every job she’d ever taken as an assassin. Killing the wrong mark was embarrassing—and clean-up was messier. Experience was the harshest and best teacher.
Which is why she knew she was missing something about that night. It eluded her as much as the identity of their mysterious thief.
“Well, I wouldn’t submit these to any museums if I were you, darling,” Bastion commented, straightening up and listlessly flipping through the pages. “I trust you won’t be offended by my firm refusal to display these. We’re both adults here.” 
Melody fought back the urge to roll her eyes. “Is there anyone there you don’t recognize?”
His black brow lifted minutely, and he studied the pages more thoroughly, eyes passing over every face and noting the ones marked dead with an x beside them. “Only this ugly fellow. Such an unfortunate nose. I hope he at least gets his use out of it between a woman’s thighs.”
As he showed her the sketch, Melody did not check her smile. It was all teeth. “That’s you. Before the glamour dropped.”
“Such a generous perception you have towards us merry Alds. You even took me for a soud! Some don’t believe the Golds are true Aldishmen at all, you know.”
“Is that what you think?”
“My dear murderess, I have grown quite immune to the opinions of my countrymen.”
“But there’s no one else?” she pressed, nodding towards the papers in his hands. “No one who looks different to you because they might’ve also been glamoured?”
“Afraid I was the only wright who came prepared and armed with intelligence.” Bastion handed the stack back to her, a dry smile appearing on his lips. “Which is a glowing commendation to the clever bastard who managed to escape unseen with my Silver.”
“Our Silver,” corrected Melody, tossing the papers aside. So that had been for nothing. If she hadn’t been keen on killing their saboteur when they found him, she sure was now. Irritated, she rubbed the bridge of her nose. “So sorry I missed the lad. I was preoccupied ensuring that a certain prepared and intelligent wright didn’t succeed in cutting open one of my major arteries.”
“You should’ve shown your face sooner, little Sharte. It might have given me pause.”
Melody climbed to her feet, extended her arms over her head, and stretched. A few vertebrae popped, and her tense muscles loosened the slightest bit. She felt more than saw Bastion’s gaze travel along the arch of her back, but she paid it no mind. Behind his charismatic mien, she heard the dripping disdain he had for her. His client—Beadman’s buyer—might have botched the whole deal with the First Silver, but Bastion still pinned plenty of blame on her, the unexpected Sharteshanian wright who’d gotten in the way. For now, he tolerated her presence. He did not like her.
She felt the same way toward him, but reclaiming the Silver took priority over personal feelings. They would succeed and be out of each other’s hair much faster by working together than going it alone. Or so attending this Jet-only fête was supposed to prove. 
“Timofey found me a dress, you said?”
“A gown,” stressed Bastion. “Regrettably, the event we’re attending is a respectable affair. On its surface, at any rate. No simple frock will do.”
“But let me guess. Full masks are too elaborate? Then, an eye mask is fine. I don’t care what’s on it, so long as it’s discreet.” If she was unable to completely hide her face as she skulked around, announcing her presence with a gaudy accessory wouldn’t help. In that regard, she and Bastion were in agreement. “I know my business, my lord. There’s no reason for you to be afraid I’ll top you—that’s not what I meant!”
Eventually, Bastion stopped laughing.
Eventually.
Melody didn’t know how Timofey lived with this man. In a figurative sense since Timofey wasn’t technically alive. At least the spirit seemed to like her or at least took some form of pity on her. If it truly was a gown he’d spied for her, that meant a long skirt. Which meant she could still wear her knives, including her dagger of First Iron. Thank the Twins. “If you do see Timofey before me, thank him, won’t you?”
“And when should I expect to hear praise fall from those acerbic lips, hm?” He shadowed her steps as she navigated through the cluttered safe house, past overturned chairs and tables overflowing with more papers, sheet music, cigarette buds, and half-full whisky tumblers. Without a hint of shame at the state of it all, he twirled a hand to indicate the room. “For providing you with all this?”
“Of course I’m grateful,” Melody allowed, her tone laced with irony. “My one regret—besides this whole thing—is that I can’t burden you less, but unfortunately, my benefactor has chosen Fachlyne for his roost. Only the most dangerous place in Kasslyne, but no matter.”
“You say that yet you haven’t even seen our shining capital! Although, that sarcasm of yours is almost charming. You must be a real brat in bed, aren’t you?” 
She spun, fixing him with an annoyed glare.  “Look, Winalils, about the gown. Don’t take this the wrong way—”
“Ach, an oft-used phrase that always achieves what it intends, but do continue.”
“The reason Timofey has my thanks is because I’m more confident that he has taste. I was terrified you’d be picking something out, and it would equate to dental floss.”
“So taking care of one’s teeth isn’t a total myth in Sharteshane.” Bastion’s mouth quirked, and he regarded her with half-lidded eyes, taking a single step closer. “For a worshipper of supposed divine beings, you have little faith. If I dressed you, darling, it would be to flatter. Death and danger each have their forbidden appeal, and a master assassin should know how to use both to seduce her prey. If you’ve never heightened your assets to such titillating ends—when you certainly have the ass and tits to do so—then perhaps we should change that sometime. Besides…” He was close enough for his cool breath to caress her neck. “Are you quite sure you’d mind overmuch playing the doll for me?” 
Her face hot, Melody shoved him back into the edge of a table to his audible amusement. “If you’re going to be a fucking prick, I’d rather hash out the rest of this with Timofey.”
“He can’t take your coin. And as adorable as you look all riled up like a bitch in heat, that’s why I’m here.”
Jaw clenching, Melody thought about biting his extended hand. Y’know, if she was going to be such a riled-up bitch. Instead, she retrieved her coin pouch, which was nowhere close to full, and concentrated on counting out a suitable amount of sems rather than test Bastion’s knowledge of using pymary through touch. The coins clinked as they fell into his open palm, the grim sight of her dwindling funds cooling her anger.  
“About that,” said Melody in a flinty tone, returning to business. “I didn’t exactly plan on an extended stay in Alderode, and the First Royal Bank of Sharteshane isn’t within walking distance. I was thinking we might amend our… arrangement.”
Bastion was already turning from her, waving a dismissive hand. “If you’re looking for charity—”
“We’re not going to find our man at this thing. Reconnaissance never goes that smoothly. We might find a lead at best,” Melody said, stepping in front of him. If he didn’t want to listen to her, he could offset away and leave her coin behind. “But that doesn’t mean it has to be a huge waste of time. Nobles are the same everywhere. They have secrets to hide. You want me to find those secrets for you, I will. Want to blackmail someone? Done. Need someone tailed after the party? Done. This might even be easier for me to do here than in Sharteshane. Women are just supposed to be part of the decor, aye?”
“Aye, except for here, it seems.” His words were clipped, but he gave her an appraising look, almost challenging. “They are also to stay where they can be seen, not wandering into forbidden places without an escort.”
“What’s that matter to me? My reputation here is a fabrication. I’m not an Aldish lady. I’m the Shade. I don’t exist.” Melody took a short, bracing breath, but what was the point in holding back now? “Listen, Winalils, this is the closest I get to selling myself, and I do take my business as seriously as a heart attack. At least tell me you’ll consider it.” 
“I already am. What I’m curious about is what you want in return.”
“A guarantee of shelter. Food, clothes, just the basics. To know that when I sleep I’ll be safe.”
His eyes narrowed. “That’s all?”
“Aye. When I say basics, I mean basics. And I don’t want to pay for another fucking dress. Sell them after or give them to one of your lays, I don’t care. But if I drop coin in this country, it’s going to be because I—we—had no other choice. I’m not going back to—” Melody stopped talking, memories carding through her mind too quickly to land on any one. Her Sharte accent was thick as she ended with, “Anywho, those’re me terms.”
For the first time since their conversation started, Melody thought Bastion looked tired. His frown somehow deepened the perpetual shadows under his eyes, which had taken on an unreachable distance. As quickly as the sight appeared, it was gone. His chin-length black hair moved just so as he tilted his head back to look down his straight nose at her, his shrug as equally careless. “I accept them, provided that my end of the bargain will only be honored on the delivery of yours.”
“That’s how it’s done.” Melody jutted out her hand, ready to seal the deal the Sharteshanian way. A bone-breaking handshake—sans the spit. They were in plague territory after all, and assassin though she was, she merely flirted with death; she didn’t court it. Bastion’s hand enfolded hers, his long fingers encasing her own. Bloody pianist hands. It didn’t bother her at all to turn their handshake into a biting vise, didn’t surprise her that Bastion winced as his bones creaked ever so slightly.
What did surprise her and cause her whole body to freeze was when, on the third pump, he bowed low and brought her hand to his lips, his mouth landing hot on her knuckles. His wet tongue slid between the skin of her middle and ring finger, his eyes flicking up to hers when she hissed. His mouth stretched into an unforgiving, unrepentant smile. 
The Aldish way to seal the deal, with a healthy side of Black Tongue.
Of course, she didn’t know that at the time.
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glamrockqueen · 4 years ago
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incoherently written music history #1: billie eilish is the gen z taylor swift and here’s why
don’t laugh at me for making my first history rambling start from 2006 okay i promise i’ll be taking these further back eventually
this particular claim was made in a conversation i had with a friend a few weeks ago and i figured what better way to start off my new tumblr experience right
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these pictures of almost identical scenes were taken almost exactly ten years apart. how did both of these ladies become mega-stars and redefine their respective genres as teenagers and what do they have in common? let’s discuss.
for starters, female singer-songwriters are not a new phenomenon. alanis morissette, tori amos, annie lennox, kate bush, the list goes on. so why were taylor and billie good representatives of the late 00s and late 10s respectively?
taylor swift released her self-titled debut album in 2006 as a country singer/songwriter at the age of 16 which is pretty impressive! and billie eilish released her debut album WHEN WE ALL FALL ASLEEP, WHERE DO WE GO? last year in 2019 at the age of 17.
although there are plenty of young singers/songwriters, not many of them can reach this level of success. and at first glance (just look at the covers of taylor’s lover and billie’s album, for example) they seem like opposites. but they actually have quite a bit in common!
both started their careers with an audience that is primarily composed of young girls
both wrote or cowrote the songs on their albums
both perfectly capture the mood of the time periods in which they became popular
while taylor debuted in 2006, in my opinion, she didn’t become a superstar until the release of fearless in 2008. considering this was now 12-14 years ago, the process of becoming a superstar was different than it was just last year. taylor was originally signed as a songwriter with sony/atv (the youngest EVER to do so at age 14) and literally built the big machine label with her success when she signed with them. with the rise of streaming and widespread usage of the internet for listening to music (which didn’t exist in 2006-2008 when all music was individually purchased), billie entered the public eye when she released ocean eyes on soundcloud and rose to megastardom within a few years, with a pretty astonishing speed. the picture of taylor swift with her grammys was taken in 2010, a full four years after her debut album was released while billie won all those awards for her debut album in the same year it was released. the rise of such platforms can certainly accelerate the path to superstardom, and it certainly did in this case.
the important note here is that for both, the audience heavily relates to the emotions in the music and the authenticity of the songwriting. taylor’s music suits the early 00s and the young millennials/zillennials well. in the mid to late 2000s, music was upbeat. pop punk and emo pop/rock like fall out boy, panic! at the disco, and my chemical romance were at their peak (just remember early tumblr), and a lot of pop and pop adjacent music was generally happy and fast paced. taylor brought country music to the previously untapped market of teenage girls (and eventually other young female country singers like kacey musgraves, kelsea ballerini, maren morris, etc became popular, almost certainly because taylor proved young women could be successful in the genre) even as she transitioned into a pop artist. she succeeded as a teenage girl in an extremely male dominated genre (in fact, to this day, many country stations are not allowed to play two songs by female artists in a row).
taylor’s greatest strength is still considered to be her songwriting, and many of her lyrics are second to none in terms of modern mainstream artists. her fans appreciate the vulnerability and pure emotion of songs like all too well and dear john, even though they’re generally less well known than many of her hits. even through multiple genre shifts, her storytelling still shines through and feels authentic even if occasionally interspersed with more lighthearted moments like me! or we are never ever getting back together. in fact, the recent folklore album appears to be a return to the very thing that brought her to prominence in the first place, with its focus on lyrics and real instrumentation rather than her recent more synth-heavy pop sound.
people related to her music because it felt like they were getting a glimpse into her diary, and that authenticity wasn’t necessarily present in pop music at the time. she appealed to the hopeless romantics (especially during the fearless and speak now eras) and was definitely relatable to the teenage girls of the 00s. taylor captured the hope and heartbreak of teenagers in such an elegant way, and many of her fans still feel closely connected to her and have a sense of “growing up with her”, even if they’ve never met her in person because of the evolution of her persona and storytelling (and also her former use of tumblr). her songwriting talents are what initially drew fans to her and why she has a such a loyal base of fans even fourteen years after the release of her first music.
however, things are different now than they were even ten years ago. young people are sad and angry and billie captures these emotions in her music. today’s teenagers are not interested in sparkles and ball gowns or sundresses and cowboy boots, but would rather wear oversized tshirts/hoodies and march in protests. they were looking for someone who dresses uniquely and who takes pride in being different. it’s clear to see even through gen z humour that happiness is generally a thing of the past. pop music has gotten slower, more melancholy, more indie-oriented, and hip hop/rap and edm-inspired music is currently topping the charts rather than bubbly pop or rock. billie represents and possibly started the trend of “bedroom pop” (as her album was quite literally recorded in a bedroom) and its more relaxed, lofi sound. with this in mind, taylor has been and continues to be a master of trends and versatility, including releasing the 1989 album before retro nostalgia became popular, as well as including elements of every conceivable genre, including hip hop (throughout all of reputation), pop punk (paper rings is essentially a pop punk song, and i will defend this claim), rock, indie, and even folk and funk in her music. 
this shift almost resembles the way punk and grunge were rejections of mainstream rock at the time; people are looking for something new and “fresh”, and for many young gen z girls, that took the form of billie eilish, since she captures the emotions they’re feeling just like taylor did for millennials. in fact, billie can almost be seen as the punk to taylor’s classic rock. the way billie can speak to this audience is remarkably similar to the way taylor spoke to the underserved market of teenage girls who like country music and fairytale romances (and reminiscent of early rock’s roots in genres that were neglected by mainstream pop radio at the time until being succeeded by activist punk music that rejected the theatrics and fancy production of 70s rock in favour of a DIY ethos). both were appropriate for their target audience.
in short, taylor’s brand wouldn’t have worked in 2019 and billie’s brand likely wouldn’t have worked in 2006, but they suit the atmosphere of their actual time periods. we can no more expect a star of the 00s to represent the teenagers of the current era any more than we can expect a star of the 80s to do the same. however, their popularity comes from the same sort of energy - young people wanting something outside of the contemporary mainstream that feels new and expresses the emotions they may not have been able to express themselves. while taylor represents teenage dreams, billie represents teenage rebellion and loneliness.
in addition, both have been politically active, as well as advocating for change in the music industry. taylor has a long history of fighting for artists’ rights, including not releasing her music to apple music until they agreed to pay artists during the three month trial period, the feud with spotify, and now her struggle to gain control of the masters for her first six albums. she has also expressed support for democratic politicians and social movements like black lives matter, despite people close to her expressing concerns that it would cause damage to her image or career. billie has also been vocal in supporting progressive causes, which again shows that she is a perfect representative of gen z stardom as young fans expect the celebrities they support to use their platform to speak about important issues.
the most important thing that links these two artists together is the impression of being genuine and relatable, especially for an audience of young women who feel as if their voices have not been heard or are not valued by the mainstream. another interesting note is that fans of both artists are/were mocked for being fans, which is almost certainly rooted in misogyny and the dismissal/trivialization of things that are enjoyed by teenage girls. neither of them are taken as seriously as they deserve to be.
for years, taylor’s music was generalized as only being about her ex boyfriends, and that opinion is still widespread, despite the fact she has incredible songs that weren’t written about romantic relationships. since the beginning, taylor and her fans have been relentlessly mocked and dismissed. taylor was bullied online to such an extent in 2016 that she disappeared from the public eye and released the reputation album in order to take back the narrative after being accused of lying and being a “snake” even though it was later shown that she had, in fact, been truthful about the situation. billie’s fans have also been mocked in the past, even though both artists have been revolutionizing pop music and will likely continue doing so. they have also expressed their strong support for each other in the past!
it’s truly past time that people recognize the power of young women to change the music industry and society as a whole. taylor and billie are good examples of a constantly changing music scene, and how the “faces” of music can be drastically different depending on generations and the demands of society and the industry. taylor and billie are both trailblazing trendsetters who have successfully tapped into the unique energy of youth in their own ways, and the way they seem almost like night and day shows just how different millennials and gen z are as teenagers.
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shamansantics · 5 years ago
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Some People Be Shitting on My Girl Ariel
And I am here to tell you why saying shit like "Ariel left her family for d*ck whereas Moana did it to save her village" is not on.
Ariel from the very start of the movie is shown to have a profound fascination with the human world. Her passion for anthropology is such that she befriended the only bird who'd come near her and avidly listens to him to collect every tidbit of information about humans that she can get.
In the famed song "Part of that World" she sings about how she longs to "ask them my questions and get some answers", which goes to show that she often feels ignored and tossed aside when she expressed curiosity. Her interests don't matter. Her concerns are invalid. (There's a lot of proof of this in the prequel where we see her dad completely ignore her when she tries to make a point about music and how Atlantea should have it.)
She also sings about wanting to be somewhere where "they don't reprimand their daughters", showing once again that she feels scorned and diminished. Powerless.
She doesn't sing about wanting to go to balls and meet dudes to thirst on. She sings about wanting to explore a new world, discover a new culture and - hopefully - better her own fate by going to a place she, although knowing little about it - feels and hopes is more progressive than her world in certain key areas, namely the respect given to young women.
Lo and behold, she sees a mortal man and is infatuated. Saves him. Sings to him. Bonds with him in the throes of danger. This is the first time she is close to the object of her passion - a real live human - and he is fascinating and male and pretty damn fine.
We don't know how much contact Ariel has with merman, but her best friend is a literal fish, her chaperone is a crab and like... do we see Ariel interact with any mermen? Or her sisters? Never. This isn't conclusive evidence but considering how tight a leash Triton tries to keep her on, I honestly wouldn't be shocked if she just plain wasn't allowed to talk to guys - tailed or legged - that were even remotely sexually compatible with her ever. So yeah.
She's out and about unsupervised, saves a hot dude, spends the night high on adrenaline and feeling like a powerful heroine while in the closest proximity she's ever been to a man who isn't her dad EVER... and the night before she'd seen him singing and dancing and being generally good humoured and not a jerk? She is going to fall hard and fast.
That's not a character flaw, okay. I repeat. FALLING IN LOVE ISN'T A CHARACTER FLAW.
It doesn't make her silly or weak or stupid to fall head over heels for a guy who represents everything she finds inspiring in a very short time. It makes her *sixteen*, her canon age, if I'm not mistaken. Hormones are high, mood is lit, guy is attractive. She's going to be attracted. She is going to love him. Love what he represents. Novelty. Freedom. Joy. Adventure.
Most of all, she's going love what he inspires in her: courage, strength, daring. And yeah, beauty and sexiness too.
He makes her feel more powerful than she's EVER felt before and they haven't even spoken yet! Unsurprisingly, she is going to confuse attraction and a feeling of empowerement with "true love", especially if she's never been told she was powerful before.
Ariel has been told she's pretty and sings well and all she's good for is sitting tight in her shell and combing her hair and performing for concerts.
As someone whose father has told them - and I quote - "the only thing I know that you can do well is sing" (ouch...), it smarts okay. It *hurts* to want more and be reduced to your voice. Unsurprising that Ariel didn't see trading it as a big deal.
By the time she goes to see Ursula, she has *saved a man's life* in the middle of a raging storm while the sea was on *fire*. Her chaperone has betrayed her leading to her father disrespecting her one time too many and then *destroyed* her most valuable possessions to "teach her a lesson". She is in love and angry and empowered. And he expects her to what? Go home and fucking *sing*?
Honestly, if Ursula hadn't asked for her voice, she'd probably have offered it up anyways in exchange for one (1) Atlean salt-and-vinegar chip.
So... keep in mind that this is the mindset of the girl who "gave up her world and family for d*ck".
Her dad's a jerk. Her sisters don't share her interest or understand her. Her best friend is a *fish* and just not able to keep up or truly connect with her the way she wishes he could. She is *lonely*. She is young. She is a girl.
And do you know what girls are taught? They're taught that the only thing that will make them feel more powerful than being in love... is being someone's mom. Ariel is too young to care about motherhood. But she is the perfect age to buy the "true love is the most powerful feeling you will ever experience" bullshit hook, line and sinker.
So if she feels empowered around a man? A good looking man at that? Must mean she's madly in love with him.
And see... this narrative... it isn't just Ariel who has it. She has spent *years* passionate about humanity and its culture only to be dismissed, mocked or forbidden to explore her interests at every turn. Her troves, build over years of exploration, is annihilated in *seconds*. Her father has NO respect whatsoever for her desire to learn about humans.
Ariel's true passion: anthropology of humanity is completely invalidated. No one sees it as something of value in this girl, much less something that might empower her enough to seek out the sea witch and give up her tail and voice to pursue. Least of all her.
And yet, it is. I am willing to bet that if she'd gone home after talking to Flotsam and Jetsam, the idea of seeking out the sea witch would have stayed there and within a decade, she'd have gone anyways.
The thing is... the interest of women and girls aren't taken seriously. They're "childish" and "immature" and "unimportant". The most important thing a woman can do is be in a relationship with a man and then a mother, or so we're told. That's why even accomplished career women are seen as having something fundamentally missing if they're single.
My point is... Ariel didn't abandon her family and home to chase after a guy she hadn't even talked to yet.
She abandoned her family and home to chase after a dream she'd had for years. The guy was a side quest that temporarily obsessed her because hormones and also threat of doom via seawitch... but folks. The sheer *delight* on that girl's face during her carriage ride through town is not the face of a woman whose biggest concern in life is getting married. You know... when her life isn't under threat if she doesn't.
What you should be pissed off about isn't that a sixteen year old dared fall in love with a guy who made her feel powerful, even though she didn't know him. And it's not that said sixteen year old was willing to trade the things OTHER PEOPLE told her were her most valuable assets (family that doesn't value her as a person, home she wants to leave, singing ability that has been used to demean her to a useless pretty thing)...
What you should be pissed off about... is that Triton thought it was okay to destroy the trove his daughter worked years towards. Would have NEVER allowed her to trade her legs and voice to go be human just for the sake of learning and enjoying human culture...
But was *blessing* her decision to do just that when framed under the lense "I'm in love with this dude I've know for less than a week and I'm gonna marry him, unfortunately tail's gotta go to make that happen and I'm never coming home ever."
He would have dragged her back kicking and screaming if she'd asked to leave so she could go pursue her passion. No amount of "proving herself worthy" would have made that an okay thing for her to do. But because it's "true love"... sure. Fine. She can go. He's fulfilled his fatherly duties anyways and made sure she's done the most important thing a daughter can do: marry a rich dude.
The moral of this story is...
A. Stop shitting on women for falling in love. It doesn't make them less worthy or their decisions less legitimate.
B. Stop shitting on women for confusing feeling empowered with falling in love when they're told about how amazing and magical the latter is and don't even know the former is exits, a lot of the time.
C. Start shitting on people for giving more legitimacy to the concept of "true love" as a motivator for making huge life changes than they do to shit like "because this thing interests me and I like it a lot and it makes me feel good when I do it". Start shitting on people for making a woman seeking a sense of fulfillment not worth a happy ending unless there's a romance too.
D. Moana was super selfish for wanting to leave her home to go explore even though she had a good family and her island was happy. And that's *okay*. Women are allowed to want things for themselves. They don't exist to please others and pacify their societies. Good on her for saving her village though.
E. Ariel was super selfish for wanting to leave her home to go explore even though her family was arguably much less awesome than Moana's. And that's *okay*. Good on her for meeting a dude she liked, falling for him and making the relationship last and be, as far as Ariel II shows us, a pretty decent one. WOMEN ARE ALLOWED TO WANT ROMANCE and it doesn't make them frivolous, even if they want it more than the "important" shit they're told they should be interested in instead. (Not that Ariel's main interest was romance, btw)
F. Women are allowed to be happy dammit. Be it via romance or career or hobby or academics or all of the above or *none* or other.
Just let women be happy without putting one down in favour of the other and shitting on them.
Ariel is a *great* movie and Ariel is a badass character and she is smart and extremely competent and *brave* and strong and good and anyone who says otherwise is a superficial coward whose forgotten what it feels like to be 16 and disrespected. In this essay I will...
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taeken-my-heart · 6 years ago
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Moirai - Chapter 3
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A/N: Bear with me if the formatting is choppy and weird. Tumblr has been doing some weird things recently so I’m still trying to figure it out. 
Summary: On your 18th birthday a name appears on your wrist. The name of your soulmate. It’s a momentous day that everyone looks forward to, but you’ve always brushed aside; refusing to believe in a fickle mistress called destiny. But what happens when on the morning of your 18th birthday you wake to find the name of your mortal enemy? Jeon Jungkook.
Pairing: Jungkook x Reader
Genre: Soulmates au/ Enemies to lovers au. Angst, fluff, bickering, romance, eventual smut.
Word Count: 5106
*Side note: I put a read more option on all my stories so if it doesn’t show up, I’m sorry :( It’s the Tumblr app and there isn’t anything I can do about it. I hope it doesn’t ruin your experience!
The next morning you woke to the sound of birds chirping. It was half way through September so the days of scorching summer heat were coming to a close and birds were finally taking to the trees again…at least until it got too cold.
You could hear your mother downstairs preparing for the day. She was humming along to the radio and the smell of pancakes had made its way under your door and was currently flooding your senses. Your stomach grumbled in protest and you stretched lazily before standing up, scratching your back and making your way to the bathroom.
You could see your dad in the backyard chopping fire wood to get ready for your barbecue and you washed your face quickly so that you could go down stairs and eat before helping him set up. He usually left a few pieces of wood for you to have a go at, even though your mother was often squawking in the background about how dangerous it was. It’s not like you were swinging the ax at your body, for crying out loud.
“Good morning!” Your mother chirped excitedly once you’d made your way into the kitchen.
“Morning, mom.” You smiled as she motioned for you to sit down and placed a plate of pancakes in front of you.
“So did Lucas say he can make it?”
“Yeah, he said he wants to come over early to help dad grill. Do you think dad would be OK with that?”
“I’m sure he would! Oh honey, I’m so happy, you know how much I like that boy. He’s always so respectful.”
“I like him too,” you blushed, taking a bite of your pancakes after soaking them in (probably too much) syrup. “What time are the Jeon’s coming over?”
“Actually, Jungkook’s already out back with your dad helping him to cut some of the fire wood.”
“What?!” You balked and your mother shushed you, rolling her eyes animatedly.
“Calm down, your father said he’d save you a few pieces,” at your smile she frowned, wiping her hands on her apron. “I wish you wouldn’t do that, you know. Chopping wood is dangerous, just let the men do it.”
“1950 called, they want their antiquated ideas back.”
“Oh hush,” your mother chuckled, swatting at you across the island, “you know what I mean.”
“It’s not like I’m putting my hand on the chopping block.” You replied smartly as you polished off one pancake. “What about his parents?”
“They’ll be over later.” Your mother replied, turning back to the stove and pouring more batter onto the skillet.
After finishing your food and washing your plate, you grabbed your hoodie from the hook by the door, pulling it over your head and hurrying outside into the backyard. “Lemme at it!” You called eagerly, rushing towards your father as he grinned and held the ax out to you.
“Here, I’ll be right back, gotta go grab some of the chairs from the garage. Don’t start chopping until I get back.” You nodded, watching as your dad walked into the garage before you turned back to the firewood, grabbing a piece and standing it up straight and then pulling the ax into the air.
“Your dad said to wait.” Jungkook called lazily, walking up beside you and you turned your gaze to glare at him.
“Mind your own business, Jungkook.” You hissed, pulling the ax a little higher before Jungkook put his hand on the wooden handle, pushing it down a little.
“It wouldn’t be very responsible of me to just let you go at it.” He insisted and you rolled your eyes, lowering the ax to the ground and turning to face him.
“You’re not my boss, Jeon, so how ‘bout you back off?”
Before you could even lift the ax above your waist Jungkook was behind you, wrapping his arms around your middle and gripping the handle of the ax firmly. “At least let me help you.”
“Get off me, plebeian. I’ve been chopping wood since I was 10 years old, I’ve got this.” You wrestled around in his arms, trying to get him to loosen his grip, but he only held firmer.
“Stop messing around.” Jungkook scolded, “Hasn’t anyone ever told you an ax is dangerous. You’re wielding this thing like a maniac.”
“You sound like my mother.” You griped, “get.off.”
“OK!” Your father called, stepping back out of the garage, four fold up chairs in his hands and Jungkook instantly let you go, stepping away and you sent a glare over your shoulder at him, but he was already making his way to your father’s side and offering assistance.
“Suck up.” You scoffed under your breath.
“OK, baby girl,” your dad called, jogging towards you, “you ready to chop some wood?”
“Born ready!” You smiled.
  30 minutes later Lucas arrived and you smiled as he walked towards you, pulling you into a hug and linking your fingers together. Jungkook looked at you, frowning, before your dad came over to greet the new addition.
“Lucas! So good to see you. How long are you in town for?”
“Not long, unfortunately. My university follows a quarter system so I’ll only be here for about two weeks.”
“That sucks.” Jungkook commented noncommittally and you flicked your gaze at him in irritation as he kept his eyes trained on the fence to your right.
“You’ll just have to make it worth your while, then. A barbecue is definitely one way to enjoy your time!”
“Especially since the season is coming to a close,” Lucas remarked, “This will probably be one of my last barbecues.”
“Well why don’t you and Y/N go inside and relax, I can finish preparations by myself.” Your dad smiled, clapping Lucas on the shoulder.
“No can do, sir.” Lucas shook his head, “my mom raised me to get my hands dirty and that’s what I’m here to do. Put me to work.”
“Good man.” Your dad grinned.
“Me too!” Jungkook said loudly, and you threw a raised eyebrow his way, but he didn’t spare you a glance, “Whatever you need. Heavy lifting? Cooking? Cleaning? I’ve got you, sir.”
“Excellent. Good to see your parents are raising you right. Y/N, honey, why don’t you go inside and relax?”
“That’s ok, dad, I don’t mind helping.”
“It’s cool, we’ve got this covered.” Jungkook insisted and you turned to frown at him. Was his chest puffed a little higher?
Before you could comment on him being more obnoxious than normal, your sister was calling for you out the backdoor and you sighed, retreating to the sanctuary of the house.
“Mom wants us to work on the pie and the salad. I’ll rock paper scissors you for the salad.”
“You’re on!” You smirked.
You shouldn’t have been so confident, you thought, frowning down at the lattice work you were doing on the top of the strawberry rhubarb pie. Your mother always insisted your pies were the best, but they were so time consuming and you’d just much rather switch off your brain and chop vegetables.
You could see your dad, Lucas, Jungkook, and Jungkook’s dad in the backyard setting up the grill and you watched as Jungkook took the lighter and hid it so Lucas couldn’t start the fire. What a petty loser. Lucas looked around cutely for a moment before shrugging and rummaging in his pocket, pulling out a packet of matches and you grinned. He had been in scouts, like Jungkook was now, and you knew he’d always taken the always be prepared motto seriously. Jungkook sulked in the background before his father called him over and he walked out of view.
“So how’d you manage to snag Lucas?” Ella asked obnoxiously and you turned to face her, rolling your eyes.
“Green’s a terrible shade on you.” You replied, finishing off the final lattice to your pie and smiling contentedly.
“I’m just saying.” She shrugged, “he’s in college now, looking for bigger and better things, has a soulmate tattoo, kind of seems like dating a high school girl is a step backwards, don’t you think?”
“He doesn’t believe in the whole “soulmates” thing.” You said, walking your pie to the oven and putting it on the center rack. You stepped back to set the timer and dusted your hands off on your apron.
“Well aren’t the two of you just a pair.” Ella replied, taking a bite of a piece of chopped cucumber. Just then all the men returned from the back and Ella turned to smile radiantly at them.
“Everything’s all set to go.” Your dad smiled, sniffing and walking to the kitchen sink to wash his hands. “Ella, go grab your mom and your aunty so we can get this party started.”
Lucas washed his hands and came to stand beside you, wrapping his arm around your waist and you smiled up at him, curling into the warmth of his shoulder. Your mother, Mrs. Jeon, and Ella returned from the living room and the two women started giving orders for everyone to grab paper plates and help take things outside to the back to get started grilling.
“Come with me.” You smiled, grabbing Lucas’ hand and pulling him back into the backyard with you. "First we eat and just talk. Once we're done eating we clean up our plates and then go to the living room to play games. We leave the food out in case anyone wants to do some grazing."
"Sounds reasonable," Lucas smiled, "what kind of games?"
"Anything," you shrugged, "we play card games, games with dice, twister, whatever. As long as we've got the stuff for it, we can play it."
"Oh, twister! I haven't played that since I was a kid. I'm definitely down for that."
"You like Twister?" Ella grinned from behind you, "that was my favorite game from when I was a little kid. It helped me get really flexible."
"Ew." You griped, wrinkling your nose and Ella blushed.
"I didn't mean it like that you weirdo."
Lucas chuckled and smiled down at her, "it's cool that you're flexible. I can barely even touch my toes. Are you gonna try out for cheer leading?" 
Ella shook her head, "No, actually, I'm in gymnastics."
"When's your next competition?" Jungkook asked from behind Ella, shoveling a large heap of chili into a bowl, "my mom was wondering and I think it would be cool to come and see one."
"Really?" Ella blushed, "you want to come to one of my gymnastics competitions?"
"Sure," Jungkook nodded, "why not?"
"Gymnastics is different from cheer leading, Jungkook, they won't be wearing miniskirts." You smirked and he rolled his eyes down at you.
"I know the difference, thanks."
You finished filling your plate and went to sit in one of the chairs underneath the big oak tree in your back garden and waited for Lucas to come and sit back beside you. After the four of you had settled into your seats and your parents nearby, you all began eating, chatting lightly as the morning bled into the early afternoon. 
After eating you returned to the house, throwing your plates away and walked to the living room, taking a seat on the couch. Games would start soon, but you had a good ten minutes of bickering to endure before the game was picked so you pulled Lucas down beside you.
"So what do you want to study anyway? Lillian said that you were thinking about some kind of technology something."
"Yeah, maybe," Lucas nodded, pulling your hand into his lap, "I was looking at doing something like engineering, specifically robotic. I'm interested in animatronics."
"Wow, that's cool! Like A.I?"
"I mean, who knows, opportunity is limitless, you know? I was thinking maybe stuff like at Disney, for now. Or other kind of theme parks that use animatronics in their rides." 
"Wow, honestly, that's amazing. I've never met someone who wants to do that sort of thing."
Lucas laughed, laying his head back against the top of the couch. "You're not the only one. It seems like most people forget that's something you can actually study."
"It's really cool, Lucas. Will you take me to see some of your robots when they're in the parks?" You grinned, wiggling your eyebrows at him, tongue trapped between your teeth. 
"I'll take you anywhere." He smiled softly. 
You blushed, burying your head in his shoulder and he chuckled. "Wow, you appreciate cheesy. I love it. I've got dad jokes for days so I hope you're prepared for that." 
"Oh no!" You groaned, shaking your head. "I'd like to rescind my acceptance of your dating proposal..." You mused and Lucas laughed, smacking your leg. 
"Hey now, you're stuck with me. No getting out of it now, missy." You smiled, leaning your head against his shoulder and he brushed some hair from your cheek. "So what do you want to study when you go to college?"
"That is a great question," you sighed, "I know I want to do something in the medical field. I'm thinking maybe labor and delivery. It would be really cool to be a part of a moment that literally changes people's lives."
"You mean like a labor and delivery doctor or nurse?" He pondered. 
"Yeah, maybe," you shrugged, "I'm thinking I'll work towards medical school and once I'm there I'll kind of try out some different things in rotations and figure out what I like." 
"My girlfriends gonna be a doctor." Lucas grinned and you chuckled. 
"No need to look so smug about it, who knows, maybe I'll flunk out of the program."
Your mother called everyone's attention suddenly, clapping her hands in excitement. "OK, as per usual, we're gonna play some games, let the food settle and then go back for desserts. What game do we want to play first?"
Ella started shouting something out about playing the board game life, your father was insisting he had a score to settle with Jungkook's dad over a poker match and you reclined in your spot to watch in amusement. 
"This is how it always goes," you whispered to Lucas, "they argue for 5 minutes and then we end up playing Rummy first because no one can make up their mind."
"Rummy?" Lucas asked.
"Yeah, it's a card game. It's meant to be played with everyone as a single player, but we play it in teams to up the stakes. I'll explain as we go."
"Cool."
Jungkook suddenly wiggled himself right in between the two of you and you looked at him, eyebrows furrowed. "What are you doing?" 
He looked at you, face the picture of innocence. "We're playing Rummy. Your mom told me to be on your team so here I am."
"And you couldn't sit in an open chair?"
"I prefer the middle." He said casually, leaning back against the couch. 
"Since when?" You griped, looking over Jungkook's head to Lucas who looked just as bewildered as you felt, squished up against the side of the couch. "Well, whatever, Lucas and I were sitting together. You can't just shove your way between us."
Jungkook looked at the both of you before shrugging, "you guys have been together all day; I think you can handle being apart for an hour. Besides, your mom is looking this way."
You glanced over at your mom who smiled at you, sending you a thumbs up and you sighed, leaning back into the couch. "Whatever." You grumbled. 
Jungkook's leg was too warm against your own and you watched as Lucas tried to engage him in conversation while Jungkook answered in short sentences and stiff replies. 
What was his problem? Why sit in between the two of you if he didn't even want to have a conversation? You could see Ella eyeing Jungkook and pouting from the other side of the room as your dad finished setting up the game and then pushed the tables together so they could all sit around. 
Why was she so obvious? It was starting to get embarrassing. Jungkook shifted and the smell of his cologne assaulted your senses. He always smelled so good, just another thing to add to the list of what you hated about him. 
"OK!" Your dad clapped loudly, bringing you back to the conversation, "what should the winner’s prize be? We already agreed that the loser gets no pie but what's a good prize for a winner?"
"What if we let the winner choose their prize?" Your mom suggested.
"It has to be reasonable, though!" You cried, "The winner can't just want to have all the pie and then they get it, you know?"
"I don't know why you're so worried," Jungkook smiled "you wouldn't get pie either way since you're going to lose."
"You're on Jeon!" You screeched and your parents laughed.
"You're on the same team!" Your mother tittered and you frowned, slumping in your seat. You'd forgotten that little tidbit. 
"Fine," you sniffed, "I'm just saying, anyway. The prize should be fair."
"OK," Mr. Jeon smiled, "I think everyone agrees, the winners can choose their prize but it needs to be within reason."
"Let's start, let's start!" Mrs. Jeon grinned, leaning forward across the table and grabbing the cards. "I'll deal."
"Fine," your mom agreed, "but this time cut them fairly. No cheating Jieun!" 
Mrs. Jeon laughed, shuffling the cards and beginning to set the table up to play. "Cross my heart." She winked. 
 No one was shocked when Mrs. Jeon's team won, and your mom, despite her best friend’s vehement insistence that she didn't, was convinced she'd rigged the game. 
You laughed until your stomach hurt, watching the two bicker like only friends of 30 odd years could. Jungkook was still sat between you and Lucas, playing a game of piano tiles on his phone and just generally being in the way.
 "So, Jungkook," Lucas said, clearing his throat, "what are you thinking of doing when you get to college?"
 Jungkook shrugged, never removing his eyes from the screen of the phone, "was thinking maybe law." He mumbled absentmindedly. You shot Lucas a look over Jungkook's shoulder, sighing. 
 "Are you gonna join in the conversation or just continue being a massive road block who's ignoring our existence."
 "It depends," Jungkook said, huffing in irritation when he hit a few wrong notes, "you guys actually talking about anything interesting?"
 "Well, we're trying but you're literally right in the middle of us." You sneered and Jungkook smirked. 
 "Sucks to suck." He chuckled, cursing when he missed a few more notes. 
 "Fine, we'll just go somewhere else." You huffed, standing and grabbing Lucas's hand to pull him away. "Let's go sit on the love seat over there." 
 After you and Lucas had moved to the other side of the room, Ella took her chance, swooping in to Jungkook's side and trying to distract him from his game. She was at least successful in garnering his attention and you were surprised to see him put away his phone and turn to engage her. 
"He's such a weirdo." You muttered and Lucas chuckled. 
"Don't think about him. He probably has a crush on you or something."
"Ew," you gagged, eyebrows shrinking in on themselves. "I doubt it. I know boys pull hair when they like a girl, but he's passed the point of cute teasing. He's just a flat out bully."
“I’ve gotta go soon, promised my sister we’d hang out for a bit today.” He reminded and you turned to pout at him.
“How soon is soon?” “In about 10 minutes.” He chuckled, pinching your cheek and you swatted his hand away.
“Well, I guess it’s only fair that I share you with your family.” You sighed dramatically.
“How magnanimous of you.”
“Wow, that’s a big word. College has changed you.” You teased and Lucas laughed.
“Hey, walk me to the door?”
“OK.” You pouted, standing and leading him towards the front door. He linked his arms around your waist, staring down at your face and smiled.
"If you're interested, I kind of thought it might be fun to drive out in my truck later and look at the stars. I mean, I know it's getting kind of cold but I've got blankets and I can bring hot chocolate or something." He said, scratching the back of his neck and you smiled. 
"Yeah, that sounds really nice!"
"Really? Cool! I kind of thought you’d say no,” he chuckled, “Can I come by again at 7?"
"That sounds great!" You grinned. 
After seeing Lucas off in his beat up Toyota pickup, you returned to the house to help your mom clean. Jungkook, his dad, and your dad were cleaning up the furniture and your mom, sister, and Jungkook's mom were all putting away the food and washing off the tables. You snagged a cookie from the tray, bitter about the fact you couldn’t have any pie and glared at the winning team, Ms. Jeon’s smile too wicked for your liking. She probably had rigged the game.
"Honey, can you grab the left over stuff from the back yard?" Your mom called and you nodded, making your way out the back door. There was a lot of stuff still out there, but you were determined to only do it in one trip.
You pushed all the food into a pile before beginning to stack them all together. It was gonna be pretty precarious, if you were honest, but you'd already come this far and you were no quitter.
"That's gonna fall."
You turned to glare as Jungkook rested his hip against the table beside you. "Don't you have a couch to move?"
"Your dad asked me to grab the chairs from out here."
"Then grab." You huffed, placing the last of the hot dog bun packs on top of your stack and wiggling your arms around the load. Jungkook didn't budge, content to watch you fail and he didn't have to watch long. 
You flailed spectacularly as the packs of buns and chips came apart and fell to the ground. Grunting in irritation, you bent down to begin picking them up, the sound of Jungkook's laughter grating on your last damn nerve.
"Here," he said, once he finally finished laughing, "Let me help you carry some of that in."
"I'm not a charity case, Jungkook." You snapped and he grinned, squatting down beside you and grabbing some of the towering bags from your hands. 
"I know you're not. I just want to help."
"You? Help?" You mocked and Jungkook rolled his eyes, chuckling. 
"Man, you really think I suck, huh?"
"Kind of." You shrugged, relinquishing some of the bread to him despite yourself. If he really wanted to help then fine, you'd prefer to lighten your load anyway.
"How can I change that?" He mused, following you into the house. 
You glanced around the room, making sure your mother wasn't in close proximity.
"By not being a douche." You said flippantly and Jungkook laughed loudly. 
"Anything else?"
"Yeah, stop pulling my hair and kicking my chair. Honestly, what are you, 5?" You said, dropping the bags of food onto the counter and turning to face him. 
He dropped the other bags beside you before settling in front of you, a little too close if you were being honest. "OK, done."
"Really?" You frowned, eyebrow rising. "What's the catch?"
"No catch," Jungkook shrugged, "just over the whole childhood feud thing." He smiled, tweaking your nose and you slapped his hand away.
"Stop touching me." You hissed, just as Jungkook's dad rounded the corner.
"Hey bud, did you finish with the chairs?"
Jungkook shook his head, "Not yet, was helping Y/N get the food. I'll do it now." He quickly spun around, making his way back to the backyard and you rubbed at your nose before leaving the kitchen and heading up the stairs to your room. 
 You had a few hours before Lucas would come back to pick you up and you intended to spend every one of those minutes in your pajamas. Pulling the longest, fluffiest socks you had out of your drawer, you shimmied out of your jeans and into a pair of shorts and an old baggy t-shirt before pulling the long socks up your legs and flailing on your bed with your phone. 
A sudden knock at your door roused your attention and you looked over just as your dad peaked his head in. "We're gonna watch a movie together, come down please."
"I just got comfortable!" You whined and he smiled.
"Come get comfortable downstairs. You've got 5 minutes."
The door closed, stealing your chance at a witty remark and you buried your face in your pillow, huffing. It would probably be too much to ask if somehow the Jeon's had magically gone home. 
You could hear Jungkook's mother laughing from the living room and you sighed. Not that you didn't like her, of course, because you did...but Jungkook was acting weird and you didn't have the energy for it.
Grabbing your phone from the covers, you trudged your way back down stairs and squished yourself beside your sister on the love seat. She looked at you, huffing her lips into a pout and you frowned.
"Do I stink or something?" You frowned. 
"No, I was just hoping Jungkook would take the spot." She sighed and you chuckled.
"Of course he wouldn't. You're forgetting he has a girlfriend, Ella."
"Nothing is permanent." She sniffed and you laughed.
"True." You nodded. "So are we watching the usual?"
"I don't even ask anymore," she sighed, "it's just a fact of life by now."
“Well they better hurry up,” you said, “Lucas is coming back at 7 and we’re going out so I haven’t got a lot of time to kill.”
“What are you guys gonna do?” Ella asked, flicking through her Instagram absentmindedly.
“Gonna do some star gazing.”
“How 90’s romcom of you.” She smarted and you smirked.
“I’ll see that jealousy and raise you a lifelong crush as a boyfriend. Let me live my 90’s fantasy, you Grinch.”
Ella scoffed, but her smile betrayed her and before you could say anything your parents were shushing you and dimming the lights.
Not long after the movie had finished and you’d snacked on some of the leftover food for dinner, Lucas was knocking on the front door and you were jumping back into your jeans and rushing from the house with quick goodbyes to your family and racing into the cab of Lucas’ truck. You talked animatedly the whole drive and Lucas told you funny stories about his roommate that had you nearly wetting your pants.
“Here we are.” He said, pulling off a dirt lane and out to a small patch of grass. It was mostly removed from the lights of the city so the stars were relatively easy to see. Lucas grabbed the blankets from beside him and made his way to the bed of the truck, laying them out before grabbing a thermos of hot chocolate and two plastic cups.
“Let me help you.” He said, standing by the back of the taillight and wrapping his hands around your hips, lifting you up. You crawled further into the back, kicking off your shoes and burrowing under the mountain of blankets he’d brought to keep you warm.
He climbed up next to you, placing the hot chocolate off to the side before climbing under the blankets with you and you nuzzled your face into his neck, staring up at the sky. “This is nice.” You said softly. “The stars are beautiful.”
“They are.” He replied, wrapping his arms around you and pulling you closer into his side. “Thank you again for inviting me over to the barbecue. It was really fun. Felt like nothings really changed since I graduated and went off to college.”
“And that’s a good thing?” You asked, raising your eyebrow at him and he chuckled.
“Yeah, it’s a comfort zone. Feels good to come back to the familiar. I mean, things changed, obviously, but so many things were the same that I didn’t feel out of place.”
“Mm,” you hummed. “I hope that when I go off to college everything changes. I want more from life, I want to move up in the world. I want my parents to stop babying my, my sister to stop being a pest, and Jungkook to fade into nothing more than a rotten memory.”
Lucas laughed, his chest rumbling under your cheek and you grinned up at him. “What about me and Lil and Noelle? You wanna keep us around?”
“Of course!” You said, clinging tighter to his waist, “I hope you guys are in my life forever. It feels like this is the beginning of something really great, you know?” You mumbled shyly. You weren’t even sure Lucas’ feelings were that deep, but you decided to put yourself out there a little and test the waters.
“Yeah, I do.” He nodded, “We’ve got a lot of potential. Limitless, you know?”
“Yeah.” You breathed, and he looked down at you, smiling.
"You look really beautiful." Lucas whispered.
You snuggled closer to him, head tipped up to look at his face. "Really?" You murmured, "Even with my messy hair and ripped jeans?"
"Especially with your messy hair and ripped jeans." Lucas chuckled. You smiled, blissful. His shaggy blonde hair had fallen into his eyes and he looked so handsome. Like every one of your childhood dreams come true.
“Can you kiss me?” You whispered.
“Now?” He mumbled and you nodded, watching as he smiled, lowering his face closer to yours before you closed your eyes and moved your face up to greet his, noses grazing slightly as his lips settled over yours.
He was warm and soft and felt like butter melting into every dip of your mouth, kiss languid in its perusal of your taste. Perfection. It was too quick, just a mere taste before he was pulling back, forehead resting against yours and a smile on his lips.
“Thank you for coming out with me tonight.” He whispered.
“Thank you for inviting me out.” You smiled, “…but I think you promised hot chocolate.”
Lucas laughed, chest rumbling against your own and sat up to retrieve the thermos and cups. “Here, let me fix that real quick.”
You stayed up laughing and talking, hot chocolate in hand until it was gone and was too cold outside to stay any longer before Lucas dropped you off back at your house with the promise of tomorrow. This was the start of something big. You just knew it.
Thank you so much for being patient with me while I wrote this chapter! The contract for my job is winding down and it’s been a very busy last few months. I’ve got 2 weeks left and then my mom is coming to visit me in Korea for 2 weeks so I won’t be able to start writing for chapter 4 until the end of March. Bear with me while I get over this new hurdle. Thank you loves. I hope you enjoyed!
Chapter 2
Chapter 4
Copyright © 2018  by taeken-my-heart (Nora.) All rights reserved.
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