#but if it means no more random LI's after this? I'll take it

[sevensoulmates]

I will say that the one thing I do like about Tim Minear's constant "get them off this hamster wheel" talk, is that it heavily implies that Tommy and Marisol are likely to be Buck and Eddie's last "revolving door" love interests, which says to me that after these relationships break off (which I am absolutely confident they will at some point between now and the end of season 8) that the next relationship Buck and Eddie have will be with each other because everyone knows that those two were always only going to be it for each other once they finally figured it out.

[write4cench]

distractions.

summary: central cee and you decided to collaborate together on a track together, but when things get a little too heated your minds drive… elsewhere

pairings: single!central cee x reader

genre: smut.. just smut

word count: 2.6k+ (unedited)

a/n: this is my first smut lmao can't believe i've done this, i mean i couldn’t help it central cee too fine. i’m not the best at it though.. 😁😁🙏🏾

central cee and you both spend your time in his private studio, located in his apartment. it's decently sized but not too spacious, regardless it gets the job done and the both of you manage to produce and record your lines for the track.

you've both wanted to work with one another on a song together and so have your fans, they've been awaiting this for so long that your management team decided it was the best decision.

you stand on inside of the booth looking down at the lyrics sheet that lies in front of you, humming the rhythm before the track plays within your headphones and you begin to sing along over your back vocals.

cench sits in front of you layed back in one of the wheely chairs that sit behind the booth, he watches you sing nodding his head to the rhythm of the song but also impressed by your vocal abilities.

it's the two of you alone in the studio which is quiet unusual considering the fact that during the last studio sessions the studio was filled with friends of central cee who decided to show up.

but instead this time, it's only the two of you. but it feels far from awkward it feels comforting and you both focus on getting the work done.

the song's chorus comes to and end and he stops the instrumental from playing again, upon finishing you glance at him and put a thumbs up asking him if you did good enough of a job, he nods and you do a small celebration that makes him laugh.

he begins to speak but it's too muffled due to the soundproof booth so you take your headphones off and open the door slightly to hear him better, "you did great, we don't even have to run it over again." he admits and you smile.

"you sure, i feel like some of it was a little off." you tell him but he shakes his head in refusal so you decided to leave it since it is his song after all.

"can i hear it over?" you ask him and he nods playing it over again, you put the headphones back onto your head and listen to it carefully.

the song starts off with central cee's wonderful rap that as usual never miss, the song then slips into the chorus that you sing and the beat drop before it sounds perfect.

the booth of you glance at one another in satisfaction at the song so far, sharing a smile as it continues before stopping at the progress so far.

"i think it's great so far." you say with a sigh as you sit behind the booth on one of the wheely chair turning yourself side to side.

"it's more than great." he mumbles.

the room is quiet and you decide to take out your phone, you glance at the time to see it read 10:43pm, it's getting later and you consider leaving within the next 20 minutes.

he finds an interest in the piano in front of the two of you, playing random notes that don't even sound too great together, you watch him finding the sight hilarious he notices so and shrugs embarrassed.

"i'm not too much a piano player," he sighs shaking his head trying to save himself, "i took lessons for a week and gave up on it." he clarifies and you nod your head numerously in a joking manner.

"can you even play any instrument?" you ask him genuinely and he shakes his head, your mouth drops in disbelief.

"maybe it's something i should get into, i don't play anything." he admits before smiling sheepishly.

"i'll show you something."

your hands find a placement onto the keyboard, testing out the position by pressing down on the notes to get the right keys. you begin to play something small and watch how his face turns into full surprise.

you smile as you continue before you get to distracted by him watching you and pause, "i can't focus with you watching me like that." you tell him annoyed and he laughs.

"forget i'm even here." he sighs closing his eyes and leaning back into your seat; you watch him do so frowning.

"how am i supposed to forget your there." you tell him but he doesn't respond so you exhale deeply before continuing to play the piano.

you'd admit, it's been a while since you've last played the piano but you've impressed yourself by still remembering the notes to the piece you play every single time.

you continue to play the piano forgetting he's even there until you come to an end, when you turn to look at him he's still laid back into his seat with his eyes closed, his hood lying over his head.

is he sleeping?

you hit him on the side of his arm and he winces before sitting upright, his hand rushing to soothe where he was attacked, "that fucking hurt." he groans and you smile to yourself.

"were you sleeping whilst i was playing?" you question him and he sighs still whining over the punch you just gave him.

"you didn't need to punch me like that," he starts watching how you only smile, "i wasn't sleeping, i was just resting my eyes innit."

you hum in response and watch how he sits upright in his seat rolling the chair over to stand beside you, he glances over the keys on the piano before speaking. "teach me something." he says.

"what am i supposed to teach you." you question him, he shrugs his shoulders with a yawn not helping you one bit.

"i dunno, maybe a chord or some shit." he utters and you bite your lip in thought of watch chord to do. he watches as your hand runs along the keyboard thinking of a position before it plays a chord.

he watches you carefully and when the pleasing sound rings he glances at you only to find you looking at him already, "did you see that?" you ask him and he shakes his head.

you roll your eyes in response, "what, am i supposed to get it on the first try?" he questions you confused only to see you nod.

you watch as his tattooed hand reaches over attempting to do the same hand movement that you did, but it doesn't succeed to make the correct sound.

"no, your supposed to do it like this." you mumble, your hand reaching over to correct his. you move his hand one down along and place it on top of his getting him to push it down as it sounds the correct chord.

"what chord was that?" he asks you curiously, you glance to look at him and it's only then you both notice how close you are to one another.

"c." you say. upon hearing your response he laughs to himself and you watch him confused, after seeing your confused face he stops laughing.

"it wasn't a c, for central cee." you mumble.

"yeah, definitely."

"you're not that special." you joke to him as you move your hand away from his and he nods gazing at you, it's only when you look up that your eyes meet his.

"mhm."

silence. you don't know what to say to him and you won't lie the way that his voice sounded when he hummed did something to you. you feel your cheeks begin to redden and you mentally curse at yourself.

luckily, the room is tinted dark blue so it's impossible for him to notice a thing; or it could just really be due to your melanated skin.

it's obvious that he notices how he's caught you out of words as a smirk grows upon his face, you watch his lips do so until he brings you out of your thoughts. "i got you quiet, i won." he mumbles.

you remain quiet not saying anything until the space between the two of you becomes smaller, before you could think of anything your lips press against his.

you can feel his smirk widen against your lips wider before he kisses you back, deeper but not too desperate. you don't even notice the fact you've just kissed central cee, your mind is just completely filled with.. desire.

the kiss runs long and you feel his arms wrap around your lower waist bringing you close to him, but the inconvenience of the chairs makes you get up from your chair and sit up on his lap instead.

it's then that everything hits you and you pull apart from his lips, your chest heaves numerously in sync with his and you eyes glance all over his face as you realise what's happening.

his gaze reads something completely different, his once playful eyes have turned dark and hazy showcasing lust instead it makes you ache for more and the position of you siting up on him creates even more need within your lower region.

"fuck." he says and before you know it, he's kissing you again. the kiss is more desperate and you fall into it, he takes the dominance but you try to keep a hold of everything by wrapping your arms around his neck.

you feel him grow harder and harder beneath you just how you grow desperate and desperate, you need him badly just as bad as you need him. you'd never ever think that tonight would turn out the way it did.

your hips subconsciously begin to move slowly against his but he grabs a hold of you stopping you, his lips part away from you and you frown at him, he sees this and smiles.

he kisses your neck and you lean your head back giving him even more space, you don't care that you'll probably end up with hickies all over your neck when you feel him slightly bite you, all you need is him.

"i need you so bad." he mumbles against your neck before pecking your neck all the way up to the side of your face, you look at one another before it hits and you share a smile.

before you know it your up from his lap and your hands occupy themselves into pulling his sweats down, when you see the sight of his harden self through his pants you glance back up at him only to see him covering his face with his hand.

you pull down his boxers and he springs free his member hitting you against your nose catching you aback, you stare at him for a moment but a moment too long and he peers down at you.

"don't just stare at it." he groans and you smile, you lick the tip of his cock and the pleasing sensation sends a moan to leave his lips. you tease him, your tounge running around the tip where he's most sensitive and he moans.

he grows to desperate and before you know it his hand comes up to your head, he finds a comfort in your hair before he pushes your head down his shaft slowly.

you breathe through your nose as you take in his size before growing used to it and beginning to pump your head slowly down his shaft continuously causing him to groan quietly.

he uses your head to help him reach his high, pumping you slowly down him but also muttering how good you are occasionally. you feel your eyes begin to water slightly but luckily you don't have to much of a gag reflex.

"fuck, you're so good." he groans as he watches you take him, his hand helping to move your hair away from your face, he closes his eyes tightly as he approaches his orgasm.

his moans become shorter and more intense and it's then you can tell that he's about to release any minute. perfect. you pull away from him and he looks down at you confused.

you watch as he glares at you annoyed, "what the fuck was that for?" he asks you but you don't say anything rubbing your mouth clean with the back of your hand.

his eyes don't leave you once, reading nothing but pissed at the interruption of his orgasm, he watches you as you take off your trousers and pants; his cock twitching ever so slightly as it pleads for your attention.

"you think i'd let you cum first?" you ask him and he furrows his brows in complete denial.

you approach him as you kick away your lower clothes that pool around your feet, glaring at him "fuck me then." you tell him, he watches you with his mouth agape never expecting to see you turn into a completely different person.

you lean against the producing equipment waiting for him expectantly, but when you feel his presence behind you and his hands hold your ass you let out a moan.

he slaps your ass, making you gasp at the sudden pain before he rubs your cheek to soothe it. he pulls out a condom from the inside of his pocket and you turn around to glance at him at the sound of it opening.

"you had that on you all along?" you ask him and he grins taking it out before pulling it over his cock.

"knew i'd need it." and with that he pushes himself into you slowly without warning making your mouth agape.

he waits for a moment until he's all the way in you before he starts to move, thrust in and out of you each time causing you to moan.

your bodies are in sync as he fucks you getting turned on by the sight of you bent before him as he fucks you senseless. he gradually becomes more faster and his thrusts become stronger.

"shit." you moan although your words sound all messed up due to the rocking back and forth you experience from his thrusts.

your hands hold onto the bumpy toggles in front of you trying to find something to hold onto as you take each thrust that runs through you. you're floating in ecstasy and it all feels too good.

he moans many things under his breath that you can't pick up on too busy by being engulfed in the intense pleasure you experience as you gradually approach your high.

you feel his hand reach over underneath you, rubbing your sensitive clit whilst he takes you; the feeling of him inside you, but his hand rubbing on your sensitive bud makes it all eventually unbareable.

your moans become louder and more desperate as you feel your high approaching; once again his hand slaps your ass earning another loud gasp from you.

your hair is held up my his hand and it's obvious your makeup is probably fucked up by now, but at this point that doesn't even matter to you anymore. everything just feels too good.

you reach your orgasm and pant vigorously, he notices this and pulls out of you rubbing himself with his hand as he releases himself inside of his condom.

you rest your head on the equipment in front of you as you both catch your breath, it's only then that you feel your legs become to grow all achy and weak.

"shit, my legs." you laugh to yourself as you wobble; he notices this and laughs tying the condom and obviously throwing it into the bin.

"good luck." he jokes and you roll your eyes.

"i need to shower." you complain feeling all sticky as usual after sex, he hums in agreement.

"i'll shower with you." he smiles.

you attempt to push him away but due to your growing weak legs you fail, instead complaining about how sore they are. seems like central cee has won in keeping you quiet.

"so are we gonna work on the track again?"

"probably not for now."

[yuyu1024]

Twilight

Pairings: Yoongi × y/n

Genre/tags: Arranged marriage

Warning: 🔞🔞 smut/angst, mention of food/eating, cursing, sensual touching, making out, needy/clingy, Pet name, lies, kink, unprotected sex, mention of smoking and drinking alchohol jealousy, insecurity, mention of weight&food/eating, mention of blood/violence

~~~~[lmk if i miss anything]

Words: 5.6k

Disclaimer:

- this story is just made up

- english is not my first language, please be nice 😊

Part 1 - Prisoner

Part 2 - Escape

Part 3 - Twilight

A/N: again thanks for liking this mini series and my simple writing... 🫶🏻 hope i don't disappoint 🙏🏻

****

[Day 1 into the marriage]

"Here is the wedding certificate and then here are the papers where all the terms of agreement are listed." The lawyer says as he puts down the pens and papers in front of you and Yoongi whilst you two are still in your wedding outfits. "These are final prints... they were revised based from our last meeting." He adds

"Good." Yoongi picks up his pen and signs the wedding certificate. "Thanks for doing this within short notice." And then he proceeds to signing our contract, flipping each page like he's just signing some random deal at work.

"No worries, Mr. Min. We've had clients who have way more pages and things to consider than yours two." The lawyer says

So, this means that a lot of rich people do this kind of contracts. Besides the pre-nup thingy. Meaning, contracts for those who got married just because they had to. What a world we live in.

"Mrs. Min?" Your eyes slowly rises. You see the lawyer handing you the pen.

"Oh." You take the pen from his hand and then slighty move forward from the sofa you are sitting so you could reach the papers.

"Left handed...?" Yoongi mumbles making you look back at him. He is sitting beside you.

"I- I am..." and then you proceed to signing everything. Not missing a page.

"Thank you Mr. and Mrs. Min." The lawyer puts everything in a folder and then an envelope and stands up to bow. "Congratulation on your marriage!"

You are not sure how to response as you know what 'marriage' you just entered. But all you could say is 'Thank you' and bow back

Then the moment the lawyer and his minions left the room, you finally relax and let out a sigh of relieved. The wedding is finally over. The day you have been preparing for months. And the acting as a perfect bride is over. Well atleast for this moment. Coz now, you are not just a bride, you are a wife now. A wife of one of the wealthiest and good looking man in the country. The only son of the famous mafia known to man.

"Don't cut your hair short..." he suddenly says cutting you from your deep thoughts

"Sorry?"

You see him staring at you. His legs crossed and his chin resting on his palm. "Maintain that length..."

Then you glance down at your curled hair that is reaching until below your chest. "Ahm.... okay." You softly answer

"Do you have a doctor?"

"Doctor? For what?"

"To monitor your health... and also a doctor to take care of you... reproductive wise..."

"W-what...?" You could feel your cheeks burn up. You didn't expect a conversation like this just after getting married. "W-why...? Like... Do we need to have children as soon as possible?"

He looks away. "The opposite." He then stands up, hands in his pockets and walks towards the door. "Monitor your period...so when I want to have sex with you... we're safe."

Speechless. He's so straightforward and he sound so cold. But atleast he is talking to you now.

"Did you hear me?" He looks back at you

"Y-yes... I will." You answer, clutching onto your skirt, nervous and scared at the same time.

"Good." He turns his back again to you. "You can rest for bit... and when you're done, your car is waiting at the back entrance."

"My... car? H-how about you?"

"I have work. I'll see you at the house."

"Oh. Okay..."

You watch him leave the room and see Mr. Kim his right hand man smile at you to bid their goodbye and close the door.

That's it for your wedding day. The very eventful day ended up to becoming so silent. Because the next time you see him is 2 weeks after. Crazy isn't it.

Weddings supposed to be followed by a trip for your honeymoon but instead you are brought to his mansion and became a prison.

***

You are walking around the mansion, familiarizing yourself with the surrounding with your personal maid that was assigned to you by your husband, when you hear commotions. Everyone are in a hurry and mumbling as they do random things.

"Miss... Master is home." Your personal maid says answering your unspoken curiosity

"Is he..." you softly say under your breathe. "Should I go to my room now and change?" You ask her.

They have debriefed you the whole two weeks your husband is out. They told you all the things you need to know and add a bit of ideas to you what Yoongi likes. More particularly, your hair being braided whenever he wants to have sex.

How funny that even his staffs know these kind of things. During the two weeks time, it made you wonder, what type of person is Yoongi. How can he be so open about his wants especially from a woman. Like woman he fucks.

It also made you question, did he fuck a lot of woman before he was forced to marry? Did he bring a different woman to pleasure him? Will you be seeing other women if you don't give him his needs? Can you satisfy him?

It's been only at beginning of this life and yet you are flooded by question but no one could answer it. You are not allowed to question him or be curious.

The maid nods and bows.

"Okay then..." you are nervous.

If ever he comes to you and he asks for sex, you are worried and scared at the same time. This is your first time. You are not experienced. You never had a chance to have to have sex yet since you are busy trying to survive and work for your family. The only experience you got is kissing and you don't even know if you are good at it. Your first and last boyfriend was the onky experience you got. you two didn't lasted that long and you were young back then so..

"What are you doing here...?"

Both you and the maid got startled a bit. You two looking back, you both see Yoongi standing at the end of the hallway.

"Y-yoongi?" You mumble, almost a whisper that you can only hear yourself.

Your husband looks like he just came from a fight. The corner of his lips is bleeding and his white shirt have blood on it too.

"Master." The maid bows and explains why you are there. "Miss is just roaming around to get familiar with the house."

While you on the other hand, you are shaking but you try your very best to hide it. "W-what happen..." your voice is too weak for him to even hear

"We were just about to go to her room to get ready." The maid adds.

Yoongi's expression is empty. He is just starring at you with those sharp eyes. It is sending shivers all over your body.

"Tell everybody to not set foot on this wing until I say so..." Yoongi orders the maid

She bows and says, "Understood." And then she glances at me and does the same. "Miss..." before she disappears leaving you and Yoongi alone in the hallway.

"What are you staring at?" He asks as he begins to walk towards you. "Do I scare you?"

"No..." you shake your head

"Do I repulse you?" He then stops right in front of you.

You can now see it more clearing. His bloody lip, the scratches on his neck and his scar. The prominent scar on his face that made you curious about him since the day you met him.

"No... not at all..." you answer

He scoffs with disbelief with your answer. "You are just saying that because of our contract."

You feel offended a little because you are being honest. You are scared of the situation but not him. You are afraid that you might mess up your first night but not because of him. He never really scares you which is odd.

Before you met him, people already gave you warning about him. You were worried yes however all of that blew away when you saw him look at you. You know something is behind those empty eyes. He is different that what people know. You don't want to judge him.

"No..." you insist.

"Really?" He then raises his hand and touch your long straight hair.

"Your hand..." you mumble seeing his red knuckles. "Does it hurt?"

"That's nothing." He answers. "I can still use my hand..." then he gently touch your breast. He let his finger feel where your nipple is and then squeezing it lightly.

You inhale sharply as you watch him do it. This is the first time anyone have touched you like this, in a semi public place. You thought you'd be uncomfortable. But no. You like it. That's what your body tells you.

He is also watching you react on his touch. His eyes never left yours. "Are you nervous?" He asks

"A little."

He smirks, "you should be."

Then he pulled you in for a kiss by grabbing you by your nape. You tip toed a little as he is taller than you. You struggled a bit to find your balance but it didn't matter seconds later as you begin to melt the moment he devours your lips. He is holding you tight and basically carrying you.

His other hand skims down your back until it reaches your ass. He's caressing you down back that it pulls up your mini dress.

"I like this." He says in between the kiss as he touched your lace underwear.

Your heart is beating so fast. The sudden thrilling feeling is overwhelming you but at the same time is turning you on. The way he touches you is making you feel you are so sexy even though you know you are not.

"Spread your legs." He orders and you follow. Then his hand goes in to your panty and cup you down there. "You're so wet." He smirks

You are out of breathe when the kissing stops but him touching you down there, it is making you so red. No one has touched you down there.

"No braids today... I can't fucking wait anymore." He then scoops you off the ground and carried you bridal style. "I'll let this one go since we just got married. I need to fuck you right now."

**********

[6months into the marriage]

Yoongi have been gone for two days for business. He said he will back today but told you not to wait and just go to bed. However, after seeing him looking at bit grumpy and frustrated during his call earlier, you can't help but worry for him. Because usually when you see him like that he'll come home with a bloody knuckle again.

Thinking about him the whole day now affects you. You can't sleep nor feel tired. Your brain is so awake and imagining things that might happen to him.

You want to call him or even message Mr. Kim to know how is he doing. But you can't. You're not allowed to contact him unless it is about your schedule or about his parents. Your interaction with him is still very limited. It's been months since you two got married but nothing has changed.

And since you can't sleep, you decided to go down to the kitchen and make yourself a hot milk. It is perfect for the winter weather and also maybe it can help to ease your mind and get you to feel sleepy even just a little bit.

"It's snowing..." you mumble to yourself as enter the kitchen area.

There is a huge window where you could see the back of the house where the mini garden. You say mini since it is mini compare to how huse this whole house is.

The bushes are all covered in snow and you could see how the moon light reflects on them. It's mesmarizing but also dangerous especially if you are out driving.

"I wonder..." you whisper as you stand right next to the window. "I hope he gets home safetly..."

***

After drinking your hot milk and spending a few minutes staring into the world outside through the window, you still don't feel sleepy at all. So even it's already pass 10pm, you decided that maybe going to your study room and to read a book might help to.

However, on your way to your study area, you walk pass by Yoongi's wing where his room is located

You could hear men talking which made you stop and observe from the end of the hall. You see Mr. Kim talking to a man wearing a white blazer coat. He looked familiar but you are not sure. Not until he turned around and talked to a nurse that came out of Yoongi's room.

He is the Min's family doctor. He is also the same doctor that did your health check up months ago.

"Why is he--"

Then a high pitched, piercing cry echoed from Yoongi's room. He's screaming. He is in pain.

Both men hurries back in his room to check on Yoongi while you on the other hand, frozen and terrified from afar. Questions like; what happened? What's going on? Is he hurt? Why? Is he okay? Why is he screaming like that?

You want to sprint forward to go and check what the fuck is going on with your husband but you are forbidden to enter his wing. Per his rule.

'Y/N... just walk away. Walk away and pretend you didn't hear anything. That's how its supposed to be...' you say to yourself in your head as you take a step back and try to act like nothing happened.

Just move on. You keep repeating as you turn your back. You know he'll not like it, you being nosy.

*******

[7 months & 1 week into the marriage]

"What is it?" He asks as he flips the page of the book he's reading.

"Oh...S-sorry..." you lower your head again and just continued pretending reading the book you have in hand.

He caught you staring at him. But to be more specific, staring at his injured shoulder. This is the first you guys spent time together again. He was gone for awhile. Their doctor insisted that he need to get an operation as his injury was serious.

Yoongi denied him so many times. Even the doctor explained the danger that it would caused him and the injury really damaging his shoulder. He's very hard headed.

But you are glad that eventually, he said yes to the operation. Everyone is relieved when Mrs. Min, his mom, got to force him out of his dungeon and straight to the hospital.

"Are you even actually reading that book?" Yoongi shuts the book he have on hand and throws it on the sofa he's sitting on.

"Ahm..." your eyes shake. "I am..."

"Okay then... what is it about?"

You lift the book more to cover your face. "A young girl... fell in love with a vampire... but the vampire does not like her... so she tries his best to find a way to be... a vampire too... coz maybe... he'll like her back." You made it up. Sort of. You barely finished reading chapter 15.

"Really?"

"Uhum..." you hum and flip a page to act like you are still reading.

Yoongi shakes his head, "What a dumb book." He mumbles.

"Why do you think it is dumb?"

He rolls his eyes. "Why would she want to be a vampire if the vampire does not even like her in the first place. What would that change? That's a bit pathetic of her and stupid"

You lower the book onto your lap and shut it slowly. "Yeah... I guess you're right..."

His comment about the book sort of hit you in the heart. Since you kind a share the same story of the female lead. You are not in love but you try so hard to be accepted and be liked by him, your husband. Though you know it will never happen. He only likes to fuck you. Nothing more. Nothing less.

"My mother wants to have lunch with you on the weekend. Be available." He says as he is focused on his phone probably reading emails.

'I'm always available.' You say in your head. 'How can I not be? I'm just at home and no where to go to.'

"Okay." You answer as you put down the book down beside you.

He is busy looking down at his phone now. Again. And just like that the room became so silent. You are just literally there to accompany him while he sits down in his home office and do whatever business he do. He do his work at home since he cannot report yet to work.

*beeps*

Your phone blinks as you receive a new message. It is a message from your friend back home, Taehyung. He's asking you how are you and also giving you updates about everything that has been going on in your small town. His simple text and updates every now and then really makes you smile. It is a simple thing that you look forward to every now and then. Since, lately, you have been loosing your smile day by day.

"What's funny?" He asks, not even looking at you

You put your phone down. "N-nothing... sorry...."

********

[11 months into the marriage]

Your wedding anniversary is coming soon and for some reason you are excited about it. You are not giggling to yourself or kicking off your feet when you are in bed alone thinking about it, however, you are really looking forward to it. For some reason, you want to celebrate it. It is a milestone for you. A simple achievement.

"Here you go, Miss." Your maid pulls out this mini plunging floral print dress with long sleeves from the hanger. You bought this online a few weeks ago. You think it is a cute dress to wear today. It is not fancy nor expensive but you like it. "Where to go today, Miss?"

You get up from the chair and undo your robe, revealing a cute pair of undergarment. "Nothing special... I just.... want to go out."

"I'll inform the driver then to get ready."

"Thank you." You take the dress from her hand so she could go on and inform the driver.

You have nothing to do today. Yoongi is out of town again and you have no schedules so you decided to go and visit your friend back home.

***

"Y/N!" Taehyung runs towards you and embraces you the moment you got out of the car. "Long time no see!" He then pats your head and pinches your cheek.

"Long time..." you answer then pulling back a little as you see his little sister running from afar. "Mia!" Bending down so you could welcome the little cutie's hug. "I've missed you! Oh my gosh! You've grown so much!"

"She's now two... can you believe it?" Taehyung says

"Oh dear!" You carry her and kisses her chubby cheeks. "I want to eat your cute little cheeks!" You tease her, making her giggle.

"Glad you had time to visit."

"Yeah... My husband is away so... I made plans."

"Why? Does he not allow you to go out?"

"No... not like that... he's busy and I got busy as well which is... new. And I'm still adjusting..."

It is true that Yoongi does not limit you with going out. It's just that you were and still adjusting big time to everything. The lifestyle, the household and Him. He is the big adjustment in your life right now.

"So, how's married life? I mean... married life with one of the richest man in the country?"

You exhale as smile. "Weird?"

"Weird? In what way?"

A lot of things. The lavish life is very nice in the beginning and exciting but then as time goes by you get very overwhelmed by the new things and items that comes in every now and then. Plus you don't repeat that much clothes which is very icky for you coz every dress and clothing is expensive so you want to wear them as much as possible.

Luckily, Yoongi didn't mind when you told him to not ask his stylists to buy you new clothes every release. You told him you wanted to buy on your own and just ask for consultation when you need to.

"Not used to it yet." Then you look behind you. "Even going around with a maid and a bodyguard."

He looks back and sees the two person standing a few feet away. "Oh... right."

"Play! Play!" Little Mia mumbles as she points at their house

"Play what?" You ask

"Ah, Dad built her a play house at the back. She likes to go their and play pretend house with her dolls." Taehyung explains

"I see.." you kiss little Mia's cheek again. "Let's play?"

"Yayaya!" Little Mia squeals in joy.

***

You spent quite a few hours at your friend's house. You even met a few old neighbors and classmates as well, catching up with their own lives and everything. It was fun. You enjoyed talking with them, finally talking this much again like before. It was refreshing.

However, along the talkings, you find it amusing that most of them got married as well after you and one is already expecting a baby and the other one is excited to go on a trip with his husband. Their stories of marriage is very different than yours. Their stories are very warm and thrilling while yours have a lot of activities yes, but the warmth, you don't have that.

You felt your smile fade away as the conversations continues. You also felt small and be like the other kid that's missing out a lot.

Taehyung even noticed it. He put his arm around you and gave you a 'it's okay' look. He knows what you are already feeling though he didn't asked what was on your mind. He just knew you needed a little nudge.

"Warm bath, miss?" Your maid asks as you both exit the elevator.

You got home already. You were knocked out on the way home.

"Maybe later?" You say.

"Understood."

"Thank you for today... you can go and rest for a bit. I'll just call you if I need you."

She bows. "Miss." And then walks off

You sigh heavily, closing your eyes shut for a few seconds before you decide to go to your study room. You want complete isolation and probably sit down at your favorite spot, the window seat and watch the sunset. Your study room have the best view of the sunset.

Pushing the window slightly open to let the crispy cool air in, then kicking your shoes off your feet as you lean your head out a bit and take in the fresh air.

The small smile you are wearing instantly vanishes as a thought comes in your head again.

Taehyung did talked to you before you left earlier. Besides asking you to visit often, he suddenly asked you if you're happy. Of course you said yes but deep inside, you question yourself. 'Am I?'

"Yah! Yoongi! You promised me that yatch so you should get me that yatch!"

You suddenly hear a woman's voice from afar. You have never heard anyone talk that loud ever in this house. So it made you curious. You peak your head out again from your window and start to look around where it comes from. And then when your eyes lands on the view of the driveway, you see Yoongi walking towards the car where Mr. Kim is waiting, holding the door and then a woman following your husband.

"Hey... don't ignore me!" She runs after Yoongi and hooks her arm to his.

It stunned you. You never hooked your arms around Yoongi's before. They.... look close. Who is she?

You see Yoongi talk to her, making an exhausted face. He looks so done and just want her to leave. But at the same time, it's not like he does not want to talk to her. Actually, he looks a bit relaxed talking to her.

Compared to you. He is strict, always serious and bored.

"Buy me the yatch!" She says again before he gets into the car.

You didn't hear what Yoongi answered. He just waved his hands and Mr. Kim shuts the door and goes to the passenger seat and leave with the unknown girl.

Before Yoongi could turn around and catch you, you instantly get back in and shut the window.

*****

[1st Anniversary]

"Good morning, Miss." Your maid enters your room and bows as she always does.

"Is he home?"

"Master left early this morning."

"Really..." you softly say. You sound sad and disappointed. "Did he say where is he going and what time will he back?"

"Sorry, Miss. Master didn't mention anything nor Mr. Kim."

"Hmm... okay then."

You had your hopes up. How stupid of you to think that he will celebrate with you. Hoping that maybe, even just for special occassions like this he could atleast be present.

It is a tough year for you. All through out this whole year, the only thing that is constant for your smile fading away. Yeah you are a bit light and always trying to be positive about the two of you. But since now its your one year into this marriage, officially 1st anniversary, and he is still like this. Maybe it's better you stop smiling already. It breaking your heart every time.

"Maybe he's with her." You mumble. "She's more of a good company than I am..." you flop on your bed and cover yourself with your duvet.

"Shall I get ready your outfits, Miss?"

"No.... just... sorry... can you please leave me alone for awhile?"

"I'll be outside."

Hearing the door closing, finally you let loose of yourself. For the first time, you are crying because of Him. Sobbing. You don't know why you are but it just felt right. You are disappointed, tired and feel unappreciated. Though you know how this thing between you two is, even you tell it to yourself hundred of times, you can't stop your own self to care and not try. You don't want to be a burden for him. You don't want to take advantage of his money. You don't want to act like you don't give a fuck. You don't want to not like him.

Yoongi is still a person, a man and you are a woman. Though you know that you don't love him you still like him. He is a kind person and giving though he is strict and have tons of rules for you but you don't care. And you don't know why you don't care.

It is very confusing for you. You are not even sure now what you are feeling. You just want him to notice you and just to... care. Maybe? Even just a little bit. ;(

You continue to cry and cry until your heart feels as numb as your eyes. You want to let it all out now to get over with your feelings. He can't see you emotional. He can't see that you care. Because if he did, maybe it will make him change his mind and let you go.

****************

[Day after 1st anniversary]

"Here's your coffee, Sir." Mr. Kim cautiously puts his cup of coffee in his desk while Yoongi is busy talking to his staff online

He did woke up early today even though he finished work late as well. He is already in his home office at 4am and very busy already. He had a few early meetings with time differences to think of.

"Can't you all fucking handle this? It's not like the task is hard!" He is scowling at the two men at the corner of the screen as he take a hit of his cigarette. "I assigned you to collect these because I know you could handle those mother fuckers. What happened?!?"

"Our mistake, Sir." One starts, "We didn't expected him to resist since it's their frist time dealing with us."

"Hmmm." Yoongi smashes his cigar on the ash tray. "Bring in your men tomorrow morning before dawn and show them how we deal with fuckers like him. And tell them this is us being super nice."

"Yes sir."

"Let's end this now. Just inform me when it's all sorted."

"Understood sir."

Yoongi then slams his laptap close and then grabs his cup of coffee to drink.

"What's my schedule for today?"

Mr. Kim then checks the ipad on his hand. "Nothing sir..."

"Nothing?" Yoongi frowns. "What you mean nothing?"

Mr. Kim looks at him and tries to see if Yoongi would realize what day it is today. "I guess you really forgot."

"Forgot what?" Yoongi puts down the coffee and pulls his phone out of his pocket to see what day it is. "So, you are telling me you didn't scheduled any work today because of my wedding anniversary yesterday?"

"Yes."

Yoongi rolls his eyes and leans back to his chair. "We have a lot of collections to do, Mr. Kim."

"I know sir. But one day of rest would not hurt." He says, "with your wife."

Raising his brow, Yoongi does not show any hint of any emotion. Mr. Kim could not sense if he's okay with it or not.

Sighing, "Ready the car." Yoongi orders the man standing by the door.

"Where are you going, Sir?" Mr. Kim questions

Yoongi didn't answer though. He just stood up and started walking to exit his office. He even told his men and even Mr. Kim to not follow him which confused most of them.

"Where do you think Master going today?" The young guard asks

Mr. Kim smiles and says, "Not sure where... but looks like he's visiting his wife first."

And he is right. Yoongi is actually stomping his way towards the other wing of the mansion where Y/N's room is located.

"Master." Two maids who are walking along the hallways this early, cleaning, sees him and greets him.

"Is she awake?"

"No sir. Not yet...."

He stops just at her door. "She's usually up early. Right?"

"Yes, master." One answer, "she do get up early... but not today..."

"Is she sick?"

"No... but..." then the maid pauses and lookd hesitant.

"What is it?" Yoongi turns to see why the maid stopped.

"Well...." she lowers her voice. "We heard that... Miss cried so much yesterday."

"Cried?" Yoongi's forehead creases with confusion

"Yes." Both maid answers

"Hmm..." Yoongi then faces Y/N's wooden door and just stayed still for a good few seconds.

"Do you want us to wake her up, Master?" One asks

"No..." he utters as he hold onto the door handle. "Please go ahead and prepare breakfast so when she wakes up at sunrise she could eat...and also... just... leave us alone for a moment..."

Both maids look at each other, surpressing a smile. They know Yoongi is worried about his wife though their master seems to not notice it himself. They find it amusing how their master is... changing. It is very minimal and not really noticable unless you have known him for quite sometime. But it is a big thing.

"We'll let the others know..." the other says, pertaining to not disturb the couple

***

Upon entering Y/N's room, Yoongi finds his wife sleeping so soundly on her queen size bed. Her arms are on her side, spreadout like they are her wings and about to fly. Her eyes, he can see how puffy they are. And her expression, she looks like she really did fell asleep crying. She even fell asleep on the buttom end of her bed.

She's adorable.

"Why did you cried?" Yoongi asks softly as he runs his knuckles on her cheek. "Is it because of me...?" He goes down to sit on the bedroom bench and picks up the book that must've fallen on the floor. "Or is it because... of this book...?" He places the book back on the bed and leans in, to fix her douvet. "I hope it's the latter... don't cry because of me... it's not worth it." He then removes the hair strands covering her face. "also.... I didn't forgot" he then bends over more before planting a soft and delicate kiss on her lips whilst making sure he won't wake her up. "Happy anniversary Y/N..." his eyes scans her face one more time before kissing her again. But this time on her forehead and whispered. "Just wait a bit more..."

***

"Sir..." Mr. Kim bows as Yoongi returns to his home office. "The car is ready..."

However, Yoongi didn't responded. He just walk pass Mr. Kim and go to stand by his office window.

"Is everything alright, Sir?"

Closing his eyes, Yoongi tries to organize his thoughts.

"Mr. Kim..."

"Yes, sir?"

Yoongi opens his eyes, just in time for the a hint of light peaks through the dark sky. "Can you please call my lawyer..."

"Sir?" Mr. Kim wonders why Yoongi suddenly wants him to contact a lawyer. "May I ask, which one?"

Yoongi turns around to face him. "Call Mr. Choi..."

Processing in his mind why Yoongi would like to call the lawyer than made their prenup and marriage contract alk of a sudden. "Okay sir... but may I ask for what reason?"

Yoongi picks up his pack of cigarette and pulls out one stick using his lips. "Just bring him in. I need to talk to him. Privately.... Asap."

"Understood, Sir."

Next: Fate

Taglist based on the replies last post 🖤

@gaby-93  @goodbyetwenty  @baechugff

@amyz78  @qeen123  @armystay89  @bangtannie7

[rederiswrites]

Look, I think if you're a US citizen you should go on Youtube and watch the debate, or at least some of the chunks of it where the topic matters most to you. You can't counter the arguments if you don't know what arguments they're making. And no, I don't mean arguing with your aunt that drank the conspiracy koolaid. I mean that there are genuinely a lot of people out there hearing what Trump is saying and thinking, "I don't know. That sounds really scary."

So know what he said, and know not just THAT he lied, but HOW he lied.

Sometimes, it's easy. There are no "abortions" after a baby is born. That would be uhhh let's see MURDER and it's already pretty illegal everywhere and absolutely no one is trying to change that. The comment Trump attributed to former VA governor Ralph Northam is completely misrepresented. Northam (whom I am not defending as a person, by the way) was commenting on the subject of *non-viable* pregnancies that represented a health risk to the mother. Nobody was talking about killing babies. Nobody. Not even Mr. Blackface.

Sometimes it's so addled that I'll leave someone else to unpack, for example, what the FUCK he was on about with the giving illegal aliens in prison forced "trangender surgery". Personally I'm assuming he just used the random word generator in his head to say something that sounded scary to him.

There is NO credible evidence that anyone, much less Haitian immigrants, is eating pets in Springfield, Ohio. Both government officials and the police say there's nothing to it. Springfield has had a huge influx of Haitian immigrants, and this is causing infrastructure strain and racial tensions. But again, people who would rather believe that a) legal immigrants are okay with *stealing your pets and eating them* and b) the entire police and gov't infrastructure of a town and the surrounding county want to cover this up, are not worth our energy. It's the people who don't know the truth and are worried that we want to reach.

And my guy, my man, Cheeto Benito, that is not how tariffs work. Tariffs are not magical free money that other countries just HAVE to give you. They're...they're not that at all. Look, I'm lazy so I'm just gonna quote CNN:

Here’s how tariffs work: When the US puts a tariff on an imported good, the cost of the tariff usually comes directly out of the bank account of an American buyer. “It’s fair to call a tariff a tax because that’s exactly what it is,” said Erica York, a senior economist at the right-leaning Tax Foundation. “There’s no way around it. It is a tax on people who buy things from foreign businesses,” she added. Trump has said that if elected, he would impose tariffs of up to 20% on every foreign import coming into the US, as well as another tariff upward of 60% on all Chinese imports. He also said he would impose a “100% tariff” on countries that shift away from using the US dollar. These duties would add to the tariffs he put on foreign steel and aluminum, washing machines, and many Chinese-made goods including baseball hats, luggage, bicycles, TVs and sneakers. President Joe Biden has left many of the Trump-era tariffs in place. It’s possible that a foreign company chooses to pay the tariff or to lower its prices to stay competitive with US-made goods that aren’t impacted by the duty. But study after study, including one from the federal government’s bipartisan US International Trade Commission, have found that Americans have borne almost the entire cost of Trump’s tariffs on Chinese products. To date, Americans have paid more than $242 billion to the US Treasury for tariffs that Trump imposed on imported solar panels, steel and aluminum, and Chinese-made goods, according to US Customs and Border Protection. [link]

Also though you should watch the debate because Harris was an absolute savage and it was genuinely HUGELY entertaining to watch her mercilessly bait Trump in every answer she gave, and watch him take the bait every. fucking. time.

[becauseimanicequeen]

My Semi-Coherent Thoughts About Let Free the Curse of Taekwondo So Far (ep. 1-6)

This is a response to some asks I got after this week's ep. 5 and 6, and some additional thoughts from me. I'll mostly throw some random points out there because I've been living in right-brain-land for most of this week (or weeks? What's time anyway, eh?), so being coherent seems like too much of a challenge right now, lol. But this post needs to be written so I can stop thinking about it and focus on something else.

Let's start with two Anons who dropped into my inbox with comments of the same context: that Dohoi was an asshole and that I wouldn't be able to defend him anymore...

Clearly, Anons, you seemed to have completely missed the point of my previous posts where I said I was neutral (I still am) and refused to go into a discussion about taking sides because that's not where the interesting bits are (not for me, anyway).

I'm on both their sides and on no one's side.

Juyeong and Dohoi have both made mistakes:

Juyeong lied about Dohoi's dad abusing him

Dohoi pretended to not know about it

Juyeong chose to stand up to Dohoi's dad even though he knew that man was a violent piece of shit

Dohoi called the police, afraid he wouldn't be able to focus on his exam, but he couldn't focus anyway

None of them communicated any of this to the other in the past

Etc.

To say that Dohoi is the asshole while Juyeong is an angel is completely ignoring an important point: nothing is ever black or white. (Yes, this is just fiction, but it's a realistic piece of fiction that shows this very point.)

Also, to think that only one of them has/does suffer is a very one-sided way of looking at it. To be fair, it's easy to fall into that trap since we're getting a lot of Juyeong's pov at the moment while Dohoi's story is still kept in the dark.

But imagine how much of a self-sabotager you are for choosing to push away people who love you because you inherently believe that you will never be good enough or will never be worthy of love. Dohoi has been in so much pain for such a long time it's familiar to him. It takes years, decades, maybe even a whole lifetime to climb out of a hole like that. And he might've been able to do that on his own if Juyeong hadn't shown up at the funeral and reminded him of all the things from the past once again.

One of the Anons then proceeded to list all the ways Juyeong was abandoned and that Dohoi did the exact same thing to him, which made Dohoi even more of an asshole...

I can't help but wonder if we've seen the same show.

Because Dohoi was abandoned too.

They’re both dealing with abandonment issues.

None of them had present parent growing up

Juyeong was adopted, which will always be a wound for him (and being adopted by those kinds of parents didn’t make it any better)

I can’t quite remember if they mentioned that Dohoi’s mom died or left but, either way, both can lead to abandonment issues (especially when a child is forced to go through it)

Then we have Hyeonho who turned from Dohoi's friend to his bully (again, Dohoi was abandoned)

When shit went down in the past, Juyeong left with his parents, and while that was a valid reason, it was yet another person who left Dohoi (which, to be fair, made Dohoi indirectly responsible since he called the police)

And then Juyeong was abandoned by Dohoi who went radio silent for years

They are both dealing with abandonment issues. Just because the show, at this point, is mostly focusing on the effects of Dohoi abandoning Juyeong doesn’t mean Dohoi wasn’t abandoned as well. Because he was. It’s mentioned and shown in subtle ways throughout the show.

Being abandoned can be a huge trauma for a person (especially for kids who don't have the tools to deal with important people leaving or dying). And we all have different trauma responses, which I think is another interesting point of this show:

Juyeong’s trauma response is to fight (he did so when he stood up for Dohoi against the bullies in the past, when he chose to stand up against Dohoi’s dad, but also when he physically punched a teacher)

Dohoi’s trauma response is flight (he tried to ignore that Juyeong was abused by his dad, he never put up a fight even when he was beaten by the bullies, he left after he threatened his dad with a knife, etc.)

None of those is a "better"/"worse" response

These characters are both traumatized for fuck's sake

And, the thing is, we've seen time and time again that the last thing Dohoi wants is to fight. He reacts even to the mere mention of it.

Juyeong fighting (even though it's never physical with Dohoi) won’t give him the results he wants from Dohoi.

And Juyeong, who was abandoned by his birth parents, adopted by a couple who didn't seem to want him anyway, and might think that no one ever fought for him, will always be hurt by Dohoi avoiding things.

They are each other's opposites even though they're dealing with a similar type of trauma.

And they won’t be able to be happy with each other (or with themselves, which is, honestly, more important) until they deal with their own trauma.

(Also, I don’t know about you, but Hwang Daseul choosing to use these contrasting trauma responses for these boys is fucking genius to me because there's so much potential for angst, which we've gotten a whole 3-course meal of. I'm well fed at this table and I won't be leaving any time soon, lol.)

One of the Anons also briefly mentioned Dohoi's old home and how he should just sell it to Juyeong because it was the only place where Juyeong was happy, and I...

*Sigh*

I'll have to admit that this was the first time in the show that my neutrality was tested because... If you can watch the following scene without feeling empathy for Dohoi, you're (no judgment) colder than me (a certified ice queen):

Imagine going back to the place where you were abused all those years. Dohoi took one look at the place, and his past traumas and emotions about what happened came pouring back. I'm not surprised he wants to sell it. Hell, if I was him, I'd want to decimate the place. But, instead, he has to deal with Juyeong wanting to buy it even though Juyeong knows what went down in that house.

If Juyeong wants to keep it "as is" to make sure Dohoi doesn't regret selling the place, Juyeong is delulu. If he wants to buy it and build something new, that's different. But we don't know what he wants yet. We don't really know why he's so intent on buying the place (other than not wanting Dohoi to regret it).

Either way, that whole situation made me feel a bit weird about Juyeong. Buying the place where the person you loved experienced trauma? What the actual fuck? And I'm not surprised that Dohoi is feeling some kind of way about it (and if he still thinks it's because Juyeong feels some kind of loyalty or guilt towards his dad, that's so fucking sad).

I do think the place is important to the rest of the story, though. It's the place where theirs began. It's the place where they loved and lost and were abused. It's the place that contains the events they both need to reconcile and deal with before moving on.

Which leads me to my speculations of where this might be going in the last two episodes. Because I think Juyeong will take Dohoi to his old home. Especially since the search history on the GPS in the car he rented included it.

That place will always be an open wound for them until they deal with the past, so Dohoi can stop running from it and Juyeong can stop living in it.

It was also the place where Dohoi's walls crumbled for the first time since the time jump, so Juyeong might think that's the best place to deal with the shit once and for all.

Walden Law Firm was also in the GPS search history, which is where Hyeonho works. My guess is that Juyeong has already gone to see Hyeonho when he meets up with Dohoi at the end of the 6th episode. Whatever might've gone down in that meeting (Juyeong saying Dohoi broke it off again, Juyeong demanding to know what happened with Dohoi during the past 12 years, Hyeonho spilling the beans, or whatever), it might be the reason why Hyeonho called Dohoi to say they needed to talk.

Then there's the biggest question of all the questions I have, which is about what happened to Dohoi during those 12 years. If Dohoi didn't graduate (at least not as an architect), how did he gain everything he now has?

In regards to college, I don't think it was anything more dramatic than him not managing to have the right results on the entrance exam. Math is an essential part of architecture, and we've already seen that math wasn't Dohoi's forte.

About his apparent wealth, though. As I mentioned before, I can't remember if they mentioned whether Dohoi's mom died or left. But, if she left, there might've been some inheritance if she eventually died, which could also be how he and Hyeonho met (since these things, more often than not, require lawyers).

If that's true, feeling that his wealth was "unearned" might be a reason he lied about the floorplans to that house. (Btw, I can't believe Juyeong didn't call Dohoi's bluff because I would've called him out on his bullshit so fucking fast, lol.)

I think it's also a part of his facade to pretend that he was okay all those years even though he was suffering (which I'm sure we'll see more of in the coming episodes).

But I also feel like there's something more. More to the reason he didn't study architecture and more to how he gained his wealth. And definitely more to what was going on between Dohoi and Hyeonho and how involved Hyeonho has been the past 12 years.

There's still so much of Dohoi's story to be revealed, and I can't wait to see it all unfold.

[howtodrawyourdragon]

Hey! Do you really think that pacifist Hiccup is fanon? No judgment, just...again, surprised by this interpretation. I'd imagine that if canon really thought Hiccup was balanced, they would have shown more of a moral struggle over the deaths related to him, no? But it's often left ambiguous (see Drago or random dragon hunter #3 who gets blasted out of the way Idk), which (to me) means people happily lived. Because they disappeared left and right without regard or mourning. We see no dead dragons or people on the ground after the Battle of the Bewilderbeast, for example, which makes the assumption that a lot of humans and animals must have died there, "objectively" wrong. Of course they needed to keep it kids-friendly, but I'd think if Hiccup was truly ruthless towards any threat to his family, they would have made the cost of peace a little more of an apparent theme. Thoughts?

I genuinely believe that Hiccup being a pacifist is a fanon thing because there's nothing in the actual canon to prove that he is.

Does Hiccup oppose war? Yes, he does. Httyd 2 is all about him wanting to prevent it from happening. In R(D)oB the thing with hiding the dragons away from Dagur was also to prevent a potential war with the Berserkers. (A war that did end up happening, although because Hiccup and Berk lied to Dagur and Hiccup fake protected him.)

Does Hiccup entirely oppose violence? Even as a means of settling disputes? No, he doesn't and every battle ever proves that. (More on that in the RttE section)

And if Httyd had a higher rating, we probably would've seen those bodies and we'd probably also see Stoick lying in pieces or at least disembowled from taking a plasma blast to the chest for his son and said son covered in his blood. The fact that we don't is simply because Httyd needs to appeal to all audiences and for the majority kids, like you said.

But this doesn't mean that people aren't actively dying in the tv-shows.

Barely passable screenshots, but these are from 'Heather Report Part 2' when Alvin holds Astrid above a cliff and that's not the face of someone who wants to be careful as he tells his Night Fury to blast him away.

Alvin gave Hiccup a choice in that scene; "surrender or I'll... well, you know the rest." Which in this context means that Hiccup should surrender or Alvin will drop Astrid to her death. Hiccup chooses to instead tell Toothless to "do it." And I doubt this means he holds no value for Astrid's life, but letting Alvin get away with the Book of Dragons just isn't an option either.

And let's not forget 'We Are Family Part 2', in which Hiccup and Toothless are so angry at Alvin for taunting him after hurting them (it's stated for days) that they don't think clearly and turn back around just to hurt him. A calculated move on Alvin's part, who hoped Hiccup would be too angry to think clearly. Angry people don't make for merciful people either.

Moving on from Alvin, shipwrecks are already hard to survive. You would need to wait for help to come to you and that is if you:

Don't drown first

Don't get picked off by predators

Die from lack of food or drinkable water

Die from exposure

Die from sickness

The USS Indianapolis is famous for having most of it's crew survive (like, 800 to 900 men?) the initial sinking of the ship only to lose most except for a little over 300 to exposure, lack of food/water and sharks. This crew started with over 1,100 men and only a little over 300 survived for four days until others learned of the sinking and send help. And that's a ship that sank in WWII, let alone a Viking ship that's mostly wood and doesn't have fancy ways to send for help.

Remember that comedic moment of Dagur vowing he's going to make Hiccup kiss his boots in the 'Smoke Gets in Your Eye' episode? When he's sitting on a piece of driftwood after the Smothering Smokebreaths tore his ships apart by taking all the metal out of them?

A funny moment, but Dagur genuinely could've died from either of the causes listed above and it's not like Hiccup looked back and had second thoughts, he went home and was glad Dagur wasn't terrorizing his village for another day.

There are plenty of times in RoB and DoB in which Hiccup and Toothless hurt people and dragons alike. Is it his intention to kill? Absolutely not, but he doesn't shy away from violence either.

For a character the fandom largely appears to consider a pacifist, he sure does spend a lot of his time committing violent acts.

Even his future wife has a tendency to show love and excitement by punching him in the dorsal fin button before giggling. Would a real pacifist put up with that? He literally spars with her for fun and she gets to throw him around, they both like doing that!

Would a pacifist even survive in a place like Berk? Where everyone is so rough and disputes sometimes easily escalate to violent action with sharp objects involved? If that is the case, we might as well call Stoick a pacifist, because he's the one going around stopping these disputes from escalating that far.

But anyway, moving on to RttE!

In Snow Way Out, this is what Hiccup says:

"If there's one chance to settle this without bloodshed, I have to try."

And seconds after, Hiccup has this interaction with Ryker:

Ryker - "In that case, surrender and you won't meet the same fate as your dragons."

Hiccup - "Okay, here's my offer. Leave now and your men won't have to find out what burning flesh smells like.

Fanon and canon agree that Hiccup is a bad liar. If he wasn't, he probably would've been able to come up with a better excuse then "I'm making... outfits!" when Astrid is on the cusp of finding out about Toothless.

Which means that Hiccup is not lying in this scene. Which means Hiccup intends on following through. Could be just a bluff, he and the rest of the Dragon Riders are kind of cornered in this scene, but that doesn't mean he isn't willing to fight his way out if his only other options are either surrender or die.

And he says it quite easily for a character so many consider a pacifist. A threat to burn Ryker's men alive.

The thing is, Hiccup probably does know what burning flesh smells like, he grew up in a village torn by war in which the other side are fire-breathing dragons. He's also literally one of the oldest children of three (he, Astrid and Snotlout are canonically 20 in Httyd 2 while Ruffnut, Tuffnut and Fishlegs 19) and the kids that aren't his peers are years younger than him. If you pay close attention to who walks around on Berk in Httyd 1, there are huge gaps in ages that continue into the tv-shows and the other movies.

So Hiccup probably is desensitized to seeing all of that, which could explain his lack of a reaction to taking lives, (a tsunami gets more of a reaction out of him) but that doesn't mean he can't mourn the failure in preventing more loss.

And let's not forget that this is also the episode in which Hiccup gave Toothless the order to shoot down Windshear, Heather and Ryker. Windshear and Heather who he considered friends until recently.

In the Guardians of Vanaheim episode, he has that moment in which he almost kills that Flyer with the Dragonblade in retaliation for the "deaths" of the Sentinels. The Riders genuinely think Hiccup is going to kill that Flyer, you can see it on their faces, which means even they think he's capable of that. Now ultimately, Hiccup decides not to and he tells the twins that they won't be torturing the prisoner. (And it's probably because of moments like that that fans decide Hiccup is a pacifist, despite all the violence he regularly partakes in)

But that doesn't change the fact that Hicctooth, Stormstrid and Snotfang chase after the Flyers with the intention of making sure that they never tell Johann about Vanaheim.

Flyer - "All I know is Johann will be very interested to learn of its existence. The others left to inform him,"

Tuffnut - "We should probably tell Hiccup."

Hiccup - "I heard, Tuff. Let's go everyone. We have to catch those Flyers."

And that is what they do. They catch up to the Flyers and make sure that they don't tell Johann about Vanaheim's existence and Vanaheim isn't mentioned again, implying that Johann never did learn about it.

Now, the show does decide to show us the Flyers surviving (one of the few they actually show us surviving, too) but that has more to do with RttE's rating than whether Hiccup is a pacifist or not. Because Hiccup really did use lightning to down them and being struck by lightning can be very, very lethal. For both the Flyers as well as the Singetails.

(And honestly, are we meant to think that they never left that little island? Considering Johann never found out about Vanaheim? Still leaves their survival kind of up for interpretation.)

In the King of Dragons two-parter, Hiccup tells his Dragon Riders to make sure Johann's ships don't make it out. That is a thing that he says.

Hiccup - "All right. Ruff, Tuff, Snotlout, you take out the ships. Make sure this is their last voyage."

All three of these moments show us Hiccup's willingness to do what it takes and it does include taking lives.

Although Hiccup does draw a hard line at when innocents are involved. Like how he didn't want to hurt the Singetails that were being forced to carry the Flyers. But it's also worth mentioning, that he did not plan on holding back when it came to the Rumblehorn that he believed threatened Gobber's life. (In RoB/DoB he didn't hold back with the Whispering and Screaming Deaths either. Even amongst dragons, Hiccup makes a clear distinction between "good" and "bad".)

That we either don't see the bodies if they're dropped by Hiccup and friends or see the enemy survive somehow (unless someone neutral or the enemy themselves take them out) has everything to do with the rating and Httyd's audience. Even the Red Death's death was bloodless and she exploded. Bits of her should've been everywhere! Instead we had the ash gently falling down to the earth.

This franchise isn't Game of Thrones, it's Httyd and Httyd has a rating that makes it appropriate for all ages. GoT level rating for Httyd probably would've given Hiccup+dragons Targaryen+dragons levels of carnage. And that isn't the case simply because of Httyd's intended audience.

And as for Hiccup's lack of a reaction to deaths supposedly caused by him, if we go back to the desensitization thing, if you used to watch people and/or dragons die in battle every other night for 15 of the most influential years of your life, you're not going to look up when you head into battle as a (young) adult on the back of a fire-breathing dragon and weep for every life snuffed out by you and your best Bud. Because one is a casualty of war and the other murder and something Hiccup hasn't done is murder.

^^^^ That is Hiccup's face as he looks into the water to see if he can spot a single sign that Drago has survived. He doesn't look like he's remorseful for Drago dying, instead he just looks worried. And knowing Hiccup's history with Drago and the reason why he set out to change his mind in the first place, it's not worry for Drago himself. It's worry that he might've survived. That he could come back to hurt his loved ones and (most importantly) his village again.

^^^^ Followed be the face of someone who wishes things had gone differently.

This is probably the biggest proof that Hiccup was meant to be chief. He set out to protect his village and he'll remain worried for his village. Maybe a hottake, but thematically/from a writer's standpoint, that points towards Hiccup destiny to be chief.

Of course, we know Drago canonically didn't survive due to the re-writes of Httyd 3 and the cancelation of The Fire Tides.

Now, I could talk about the Serpent's Heir.

I could talk about the absolute decisiveness in Hiccup's expression and everybody's lack of a reaction to Hiccup setting a guy on fire (the most we get is Astrid stating how she couldn't keep him out of trouble) and how this is the clearest evidence of Hiccup taking lives with his own two hands to protect himself, but most importantly, Toothless. (And just like many villains before him, Hiccup did try to talk sense into Calder)

I could talk about Dragonvine (I don't have an online version of that comic) and how Toothless was poisoned and Hiccup almost hurt young Silkspanners because he believed they were about to make Toothless' last few hours in life Hell. (Meaning each comic gave an example of Hiccup protecting Toothless against a human and dragons respectively)

But the movies and shows are teeming with examples of Hiccup getting his hands dirty (either with his own two hands or through Toothless) to protect either himself or someone he loves. And that makes him the exact opposite of a pacifist. Because Hiccup will use violence to protect who he loves and what he believes in.

But like I said, Hiccup isn't a one-dimensional character and it's true that he doesn't want violence to be his first option. Rather he'll often give his foes the chance to resolve things peacefully if it prevents bloodshed on both sides. I've mentioned it once before in another post, but with how many casualties there are on the opposite side at all times and none on the side of the Dragon Riders (minus the occasional arrow wound or Stoick's death) it's only fair for Hiccup to give his foes the chance the back out. It's just that they never do, always underestimating him and the Dragon Riders.

And with the Red Death that kind of was never an option to begin with and Hiccup knew that.

But we do see him try to forgive his foes even though they've either stabbed him in the back before or are obviously planning to and that is likely where the "naive" part comes from. But Hiccup is also 15 to 20 years old, he doesn't even have half as much life experience as his foes do, who are every single one of them grown-ass adults well over a decade older than him.

And we do see him have moments of remorse, like in RttE when he tells Viggo that things didn't have to end so fatally in Shell-shocked Part 2 or when we see him make a big deal about not hurting the innocent Singetails in season 5 or even when deciding to give the fishing boat with the Scourge of Odin a proper send off. I think that's where the "pacifist" part of the fancanon probably comes from.

Even though we not only see Hiccup actively partake in violence without lying awake about it, but also be smug about both big and small wins and simply enjoy the thrill. (And to repeat once more, he actively enjoys sparring with his wife who likes punching his dorsal fin button to show him just how excited she is about something)

But anyway, a veeeeeeeerrryy long way of ranting about how the proof that Hiccup isn't a pacifist is from Httyd 1 all the way to httyd 2 (And the two comics) and that actual on-screen deaths are only not there purely because the franchise's audience is still largely children. :)

[an-au-blog]

I love zosan and think the art made me love it even more, but if I'm being honest with myself and how I feel about the canon, I'd say there should be zolu and sanuso before zosan. Let me explain:

The only logical explanation for Zoro - a pirate hunter, who had killed pirates for very petty reasons... to join a random guy with no crew, no boat and a pipedream, is that he saw something in him. The sheer amount of loyalty this man holds for his captain is more than akin to blind devotion than anything. And the trust Luffy holds in his first mate is absolutely astounding.

Outside of the ladies, Sanji only ever defends/vouches for Usopp. Even though Usopp is a man, Sanji doesn't treat him with the annoyance he sometimes has for Luffy and Zoro. During the water 7 arc, he keeps defending Usopp even though the Mary fiascos. He's super protective towards him.

In conclusion, here's how I think it'd go:

Sanji had been unintentionally courting Usopp and only realized it when water 7 happened. At some point while they're still in recovery or maybe while they were still traveling to enmys lobby, he tries to tell him what he's realized. Because if he really leaves the crew, this would be his only chance and he needed to live without regrets, as there was no guarantee what could happen.

Sanji: Usopp, I know it's not the time or place, but-

Usopp: Haha, this isn't Usopp, I'm Sniper King, remember?!

Sanji (defeated, knowing nothing will come of this): Yeah, well, when you see Usopp, can you tell him that I'm sorry I couldn't tell him on time, but I love him and I regret only realizing it now...

Usopp: ...

Usopp: Oh... well... I'll be sure to tell him.

Sanji might have taken that as a nice way to reject him, so he decided to take it with dignity and leave but was stopped when he heard

Usopp: And thank you... I mean, he'd probably thank you. For telling him.

Would it be too pathetic of Sanji to hold onto hope?

After everything was said and done, Usopp joined again. Sanji had forgotten, with all the things that happened, about his confession. So he was a bit surprised when he approached him about it.

S: Soooo... Sniper King told me what you wanted to tell me...

U, sweating bullets: Whaaat? I didn't mean- I mean I never told him to tell you anything, idk what you're talking about. That sniper king guy probably lied!

S: I don't think he's the type to lie. He's a man of honor, you know.

U, not believe that he's getting jealous of himself: you're so easy to defend him, you like him or something?

S, with embarrassment but loving adoration: Yeah.

U, heart broken: Oh. Well, I wish you two a happy life then.

(If he's wondering whether or not to "rejoin as SK", but living a double life would be hard and -)

S: Wait, where are you going. I just told you I loved you and you're walking away? Did something happen, I thought...

U: You said you like Sniper King, not me. (*insert rant about how SK is so much better than Usopp and all that self degrading bs*)

S: Okay, okay, no. I know you're the same person. But if you insist: I love you too. Not only in a friend way, not because of your persona, but because of you. Usopp.

And awww, would you look at that, they started dating. Time passes and Usopp stops feeling as insecure as he had before. Sanji keeps flirting with women but never means it and they all know it because they always ends up back in each other's arms. But then something devastating happens. Sanji can't stop thinking about how the mosshead never wears a shirt. It's infuriating and Usopp kind of understands, at one point he goes "Have you tried touching his chest? Maybe you'll get it out of your system."

To which Sanji is 1. Speechless, petrified, flabbergasted; 2. Shook and horrified at the suggestion; 3. Kind of obsessed with the idea now that he thinks about it; 4. defensive because "my love, you are all I need how could youuuu think thaaat".

In that order.

Usopp, laughing nervously: It's not like I haven't done it.

Sanji: What?

Usopp: What.

So it turned out, that one night of drinking made Zoro almost kiss Usopp, which he backed away because he was afraid, but then Zoro called it "physical traids" which made him.confused and a bit worried that he didn't know what that was, so he said he'd think about it. Zoro looked at him in a way that conveyed "what is there to think about", but never voiced it. With a shrug, he said okay and never tried anything after that.

So Sanji and Usopp decided that they needed to talk about it with the swordsman himself. To work out the logistics if anything... What he said, however, none of them expected.

Zoro: I don't know why you make it into a big fuss. Physical traids, yeah, it's like: I find you attractive, you find me attractive, we care for each other so we make out or if we're feeling it - more. How can Luffy het it, but you can't.

Jaws on the floor.

They call Luffy in on the conversation and it gets worse.

Luffy: Yeah, it's like when I'm bored, or feel like it, we do stuff. But I don't really wanna kiss anyone else and I told him you guys are okay to kiss cause I trust you!

Explaining to them that, yes - that's kind of what dating is, and yes - they've been technically exclusively dating until now, went about as well as one might have hoped. At one point, Sanji definitely got frustrated from his own overthinking about why Marimo had hit on his boyfriend but never him. To which Zoro responded that he had tried a couple of times but Sanji just kicked or ignored him, so he gave up, thinking he wasn't interested.

And at some point Luffy definitely drops something like "I'd like to try with you guys too, it could be fun." with a beaming smile and both Usopp and Sanji wouldn't be able to stop thinking about ot for a week straight, low-key obsessing over it until they decide, okay, yes. And then they would tell him and he would just go "Oh, right, forgot about that, sure, let's do it!"

(idk this was funnier in my head)

[genshinrail]

I Love Your Crazy Self

Il Dottore x Reader

Fluff | Word count: 2070

Summary: You slip that you love him, and with some effort get him to cuddle you.

Warnings: A little suggestive in the end.

___

You started into space. Dottore’s face started looking blurrier and blurrier as was explaining a new theory he had. Honestly, you were not smart enough for it and all that he said went in one ear and through the other. But, you didn’t want to seem rude, so you let him explain while you sometimes nodded your head. He was so cute when he was getting into his theories and research.

“Darling?”

You were snapped out of your trance with Dottore’s affectionate pet name for you.

“Uh, what?” You asked.

“Were you even listening?” He sighed softly.

“O-of course I was!” You lied. “Something about… the ruin guards?”

Dottore sighed again but followed it with a chuckle. “You know, if my ideas are too much for you, you can go work for another Harbinger for a bit.”

Your lips formed into a pout. “No.”

Dottore looked over at you behind his mask. “Really? But maybe you need a break from the lab and the clones-“

“No, I'll help!” You said and slapped your hands together. “I love you even if you’re crazy”.

Dottore froze entirely in his tracks, and you realized what you had just said. Even if you couldn’t see his eyes, you knew he was looking at you with a sly look.

“What did you just say?” He asked with a smirk forming on his lips.

You were silent for a second, trying to come up with a good lie. “Uh… that I’ll help even if you’re crazy?”

Now Dottore was fully grinning. You could feel your cheeks heating up. Curse this man for having such an effect on you.

“I think you’re forgetting something”, he spoke with a slightly condescending tone.

You pouted.

Dottore let out a charming chuckle and he walked close to you. With his thumb, he gently lifted his mask and leaned in to give you a peck on your lips. It felt like you had a fever.

“You’re lucky”, Dottore said while leaning back. “I love you too. Even if you’re clingy and distract me most of the time”.

Those words hit you hard and you smiled widely. He had never said he loves you yet like you haven’t said you love him. However, you realized what he said after those three words and once again you pouted, crossing your arms.

“Hey!”

Dottore flashed you a smile but turned around to do what he was busy with. Archons, why was he so cute?

You huffed. Two can play this game. You decided to make it your mission to annoy him. If he can tease you, you can tease him. While he tried to work on some experiment, you walked up to him.

”It just slipped”, you said with a huff. ”I didn’t mean anything like that. You’re in over your head.”

Dottore let out a simple ”mm-hm”, but didn’t take his attention from his work. You huffed dramatically. He was trying to concentrate, and ignore you the best he could. You smirk, hugging him from the back. He let out a small groan but didn’t react physically. Already used to your random acts of affection, he had learned to ignore them while working.

”Zandik!” You whined.

He was getting more annoyed, physically shifting. With a gentle push, he got you off from clinging to him to get something from a drawer. But you weren’t done, sliding next to him, grabbing his hand. He winced, pulling his hand away. You pouted. Dottore sighed, then walked back to his experiment. A grin formed on your face. The teasing had been successful.

Again, you walked next to him, but this time leaned your head against him. If you could purr, you would. Dottore stopped. He let out one of his weird noises when he was annoyed.

”What?” You grinned. ”You said you love me, even if I’m needy.”

Dottore chuckled, looked at you, and smiled casually. 

”I do.”

Huh? You took a step back. He was still smiling as if he wasn’t even a little bit annoyed. Your whole face heated up and it probably showed as Dottore suddenly started grinning amusingly. You glared at him, but couldn’t come up with a good comeback. He let out a ”haha” and went back to his work. You shot him a glare that he could not see, huffing to yourself. 

   The rest of the time he worked, you tried to annoy him more and more. You were talking a lot and clung to him when you could. You were already about to give up after you weren’t successful with your attempts, but then Dottore sighed loudly.

“I can’t get anything done with you clinging to me”, he said. “I’ll ask one of the segments to finish my work.”

You tilted your head while watching him. Soon, a younger segment, meaning a clone of his younger self, stepped into the lab.

“You called?” he asked.

“Please finish this for me”, the original Dottore told him.

The segment nodded and walked up to the table, examining what he would have to do. Dottore walked away. You followed him confused about what he was up to. Admittedly, you felt a little nervous. What if he was mad at you?

Dottore entered his own sleeping chamber. It looked simple and rough, but also somehow messy. It just felt like he barely spent any time there, so he didn’t care to clean or add any personality. There was just his bed, a shelf full of books, and a nightstand with a lamp and some medicine.

He walked to the shelf, placing his index finger on his chin, searching for something. He then picked one book and walked over to the bed. He placed the book on the sheets and took his lab coat off, revealing a blue shirt underneath. Carefully, he put the coat to hang on the bed railing. Then, he took the book again and went to lie down, opening the book to read it. And finally, he took off his mask and placed it on the nightstand. You stood in the doorway, not sure what to do. Dottore glanced in your direction.

“Hmm?” he raised his brow.

“What?” you blinked your eyes in confusion.

Dottore sighed. “Are you coming in or not?”

Your mind started to wander. “I am not in the mood…”

Now Dottore moved his head to look directly at you. “You’re not in the mood to cuddle?”

Wait, what? Your whole face started feeling hot and based on Dottore’s grin, it showed. You didn’t know what to say, so you simply walked, or nearly ran, to him. Awkwardly, you crawled over him to the other side of the bed and lay down. Dottore let out a heartwarming chuckle and wrapped his free arm over your shoulder. You scooted closer to him, placing your hand on his chest.

Dottore turned his attention to the book, but you didn’t really care. You were able to hold him without him working and that was the most important thing. You nuzzled your cheek against his chest, smiling.

Suddenly, you felt his slender hand on your head. You blinked as he gave you a gentle pat. With curious eyes, you glanced up at his face. He was still reading his book, about Khaenri’ah no doubt, but his hand was on top of your head.

You smiled widely and continued to cuddle him while he played with your hair. It was so nice, so soothing and so intimate. Even if those not-so-pure activities you shared were great and personal, it was moments like these that were truly intimate. You knew he cared about you, even if others tried to change your mind. With your eyes closed, you drifted off to sleep listening to Dottore’s heartbeat.

   Slowly, you blinked your eyes open and curled up on the bed. How long had it been? You took a deep breath and stretched your body, trying to place your hand back on Dottore’s chest. But, to your disappointment, you couldn’t feel it. With a light move, you lifted yourself  with your elbow to look around you. Where Dottore had been, was now cold and empty, but somehow the blanket was wrapped around you. With a swift push, you got yourself to sit on the bed.

“Did I seriously fall asleep?” You cursed to yourself. “When I finally got that man to cuddle with me?”

With a sigh, you pulled the blanket off and got up. While ruffling your hair a bit to fix it, you walked over to the door to get back in the lab. The white light was so bright, blinding you. As your eyes started to adjust, you could see a silhouette of a man with a lab coat.

“Oh you’re awake”, Dottore noted of your presence. “It’s been a while, I thought you might sleep through the night.”

“How long was I asleep then?”

Dottore turned to look over at you, he was wearing his mask again, tapping his chin as if he was counting. “Hmm, three hours and twenty-one minutes”.

“Three hours??” You repeated. “Why didn’t you wake me up?”

“You fell asleep almost immediately”, there was a chuckle. “And you looked so peaceful and lovely that after I was finished with my reading, I left to continue my work by myself.”

You pouted, snuggly crossing your arms in front of your chest. “You could’ve at least asked the segment to cuddle with me then…”

Dottore let out a huff. It was something he did when he was unamused or jealous. Which one was it this time, you wondered.

“But I guess I got at least some cuddles”, you sighed in defeat. “So I will help you with the work.”

The man laughed, the corners of his lips turning into a smile. You raised your brow in a response to his weird reaction.

“Luckily for you, my dear-“ He took steps closer to you until he was right in front of you. His gloved hand grabbed your chin, making you look up at him. Of course, with his mask on, all you could concentrate on was his lips. “I just finished my work.”

You blinked rapidly. “So… we can go back to cuddle??” You couldn’t hide your excitement, nor did you care to.

“Yes, if you want.”

You hadn’t even noticed that Dottore’s face was now much closer to you, close enough for the beak of his mask to poke your nose. He lifted his mask a tad and leaned in. Like a reflex, your eyes closed and your lips touched. It was subtle. A small soft kiss. Your favorite kind, well unless you were in a different mood.

But then, you only wanted his love and affection, which he so graciously gave you. You put your hand on the side of his head, touching his hair.

That was when you truly noticed his smell, and how greasy and crusty his icy blue hair was. This man had not showered in a while.

You awkwardly pulled back a bit, shaking your head. Dottore raised his eyebrow while staring at you, his mask still lifted so you could see his eyes.

“We’ll cuddle… after you’ve taken a shower.”

Another unamused huff. “A shower?”

“Yes. Your hair is disgusting and you smell.” You so bluntly replied, but it was with affection.

Dottore sighed. This time you couldn’t read what it meant. You narrowed your eyes a bit. Maybe you were rude? You were about to apologize, but before you could even utter a word, Dottore spoke: 

“You’re lucky I am in love with you.”

What? Your whole body froze as your brain tried to register what he had just said. Did you hear him correctly? You stared at him with wide eyes. 

“Are you okay, dear?” This man, he knew exactly what he was doing. What he was doing to you. But his words still felt sincere, so you didn’t even pout, well you couldn’t anyway.

He turned away, heading towards his lab’s bathroom area. Yes, he was indeed living in his lab. You were still frozen in place, processing.

“Well?” Dottore’s deep voice snapped you out of your trance.

Your gaze went to him. He was standing in front of the door, his hand on his hip. His mask was now off and you could see his red eyes a tad darker, a grin framing his face.

“Are you joining me or not?”

___

A/N: I've been posting so much Dottore haha. At this point, I feel like I need to finish with smut before I can move on to other characters.

[lvrsparadise]

'strangers.' - M.S

synopsis - "and then one random night when everything changes, you won't reply, and we'll go back to strangers."

warnings! - angst, kissing, profanity, depressing (i hurt my own heart writing this), italics are flashbacks, the bold italic in matt's pov is his thoughts (he's battling with himself). based on strangers by kenya grace

a/n - i wrote this in math class..... anyways. i absolutely love this, but hate myself for making it so sad. also, just to clarify, when the text part comes up, he's not cheating !! my friend thought he was and i had to clarify. (ths is me stalling as i try to finish the tracklist post and finish nikes (i started it!!!))

i smile as i get in the car,

we’ll get in your car.

matt leans over and gives me a kiss.

and you’ll lean to kiss me.

i look to the backseat to see the seats down and blankets and colorful lights decorating the back of the van.

“what’s that?” i turn my head to him with my brows furrowed, but a smile on my face nonetheless.

“movie night under the stars.” he smiles as he puts the car in drive and starts driving.

“you’re kidding right?”

“no, i’m not.” he reaches over and grabs my hand, lacing our fingers together and resting our interlocked hands on the center console.

--

we’ve parked in a field with the sunroof open.

i get out of the front seat and open the backdoor, crawling into the back of the van, lying on all the fuzzy blankets.

“how long did it take to set this all up?” i laugh as he gets in and lies down beside me, opening his backpack and getting out his laptop before pulling me into his arms.

“don’t even ask.” he shakes his head softly with a chuckle before he kisses my head and opens his computer, turning on our favorite movie before grabbing one of the many blankets and draping it over us.

we’ll talk for hours and lie on the backseat.

----

i sigh as i turn my phone back on.

maybe i’m being too paranoid. 

maybe he’s just busy, being famous is time consuming.

and then one random night

i try to refocus on the show that’s on my tv, for the 4th time. nothing’s working. why can’t i distract my mind long enough?

i only just sent the text.

maybe his phone’s dead.

when everything changes

no. i shake my head softly to clear my thoughts and i grab my phone and walk into my kitchen, placing it on the counter before walking back to the living room and switching the tv to a movie i’ve only seen but a thousand times just to rip my mind away from him.

you won’t reply,

and we'll go back to strangers.

----

my eyes light up when i look at the bouquet of red dahlias in matt’s hands.

“where’d you get these?”

“i kind of drove around for like 3 hours searching for a shop that sells them.” he chuckles nervously and scratches the back of his head.

“well, they’re gorgeous!” i look back up to his face to see the kindest smile on it, making his otherwise sharp features soft and kind.

“i’m surprised you still remember, i told you these were my favorite back in middle school.”

“of course i remembered. i always remember everything you tell me. i'll write them in my notes app or i'll go home and write them in my journal for me to go back to.” how does this man get any better? 

“i-” i’m speechless at the small confession, his words meaning more than i thought they would, making my heart flutter.

i take the bouquet into my hands and smell the flowers, smelling as good as the last time he got me them.

“do you want to take those with us, or do you want to set them in a vase first?”

“i don’t know, actually.” i chuckle and look back up at his face.

“here.” he grabs them from my hand and gestures for me to walk back into my house, him following in after me. 

we walk into the kitchen and i immediately spot the vase my mother got me for my birthday. i grab that and fill it with some water as matt sets the bouquet on the counter, unwrapping them and cutting the stems.

i set the vase in the middle of the island and matt carries over the flowers, placing them in the vase before grabbing one out and handing it to me.

“thank you matt.” i place one hand on the side of his face, pulling his face closer and kissing him.

“anything for my pretty lady.”

----

it’s been a few hours, maybe he’s replied?

i’m hungry anyways.

i get up from the couch and walk into the kitchen, grabbing out food and making me something to eat before picking up my phone.

i take a deep breath and turn on the screen.

nothing. great.

stop overthinking it. it’s probably nothing.

i open my phone and click on instagram, looking through everyone’s stories, matts popping up first.

it’s just a promotion of their new video.

that’s right, maybe he was filming and didn’t get to be on his phone.

---

!Matt’s POV!

i stare at the text on my screen for a little longer than i should.

pretty girl ♡: hey, i was wondering if you wanted to go out to eat tonight?

i just lock my phone and toss it next to me on my bed.

and then one random night

it’s not her fault, it’s mine. i just can’t be around her anymore.

we’ve already fought about it many times. im just helping.

when everything changes.

right?

she’s mad i don’t want to show her off, which is wrong. i want to. so bad.

but i don’t want her to get hurt.

but isn’t that what you’re doing to her now?

shut up.

all you’re doing is making her hurt more.

stop it.

it’s your fault if she shows up at your door crying and screaming.

that won’t happen.

yes it will. and it’ll be all your fault.

i said stop it.

you can’t get rid of me. not like you’re getting rid of her.

i’m not getting rid of her. i'm helping her.

like ghosting her is helping her.

you won’t reply

i scrub my hand over my face and sigh.

“fuck, fuck, fuck.” maybe this isn’t such a good idea.

there’s no going back now.

and we’ll go back to strangers.

Tags ! ✮

@dwntwn-strnlo ✮ @ssturniolo ✮ @strniolo ✮ @20nugs ✮ @prettysturniolo ✮ @mxqdii ✮ @thetriplets3 ✮ @slaysturniolo ✮ @gwenlore ✮ @opheliaofficial07 ✮ @gabbylovesreading ✮ @luvsturniolo ✮ @itsaaliyah2 ✮

If you want to be added to the list, all you have to do is ask ! ✮

I love you all !

And I hope you all have a good day and / or night ✮

[oshinohoshi]

Oshi no Ko Ch 160 thoughts

I think I'll start this out with a jump scare.

Imagine this guy showing up at your door trying to sell you a nice new set of kitchen knives. I'd take ten.

The above image is so ghoulish that I'd be tempted to see it as just Aqua's distorted perception of his father, not a mask off moment where Hikaru morphed into Slenderman

But I have no confidence that this chapter didn't just toss Hikaru's character development in the bin

A well-executed twist following a twist should be satisfying but rather than getting a nice "aha" moment, I'm just getting whiplash

Even though I don't like it, I guess I can buy a heartbroken and jaded Hikaru who subtly manipulated Ryosuke into becoming more unhinged and later influenced Nino to do his dirty work

Although I don't think Ryosuke needed any help being a dumpster fire of a human and Nino really has nobody to blame but herself

But then what were chapters 154 and 155 about?

The mess that was HkAi is so compelling to me. I find their relationship sweet and tragic. It was a disaster that could have become something lovely if they weren't such fragile people already deeply wounded at a young age

In order for Hikaru's realization that Ai loved him to be as impactful as it is, then "I'm going to do what I can for Ai" can't be a lie

Which means he can't have wanted to hurt Ruby after watching the DVD

Which means that we're gonna keep spinning in circles about Hikaru's culpability and motives until Akasaka lets us off this ride

We've gone from "Aqua delivered a revenge worse than death to an already self-destructive man" to "oh, I guess that meant nothing. Time to have a knife fight"

And then there's the below panel. The worst thing Hikaru said about Ai was that she was a normal girl who could be cruel. Now she's standing next to a very accusatory speech bubble

"Make people obey you?" Hikaru wouldn't think that of Ai post 154

I wouldn't be surprised if he's just winding Aqua up because he has a death wish, but I think that's just me trying to cope

I've been waiting a very long time for "you're just like me" from Hikaru to Aqua but it would have been more effective if the panels supposedly showing Aqua's power to charm didn't seem to have been chosen at random

Can I just say, this panel makes me uncomfortable:

It's hard to think of Ruby wholeheartedly singing love songs to sweaty 20-something men, and the way Ai and B Komachi started doing so when they were just children, and not feel weird

OnK does a wonderful job portraying the good things about idol fandom alongside the heinously toxic things, but it's so heavily weighted on the good side with Ruby that it sometimes makes me think Ai's death at the hands of an obsessive idol otaku who believed she couldn't be a real person because she sang love songs to her fans was a fever dream

And I know this is Aqua's image of Ruby, but it just seems like we're completely ignoring the arc where she went into full on manipulation mode (like father like daughter, I guess)

Anyway, the standout moments of this chapter were that Ai drew a heart on her toothbrush and the below panel. The little Hoshino family melts my ugly, deceptive heart

Christ. I haven't even mentioned Aqua's big ass knife

Aqua won't stab anyone. Just maybe do some light slashing

There is a blatant retcon about Nino and Ryosuke at the hospital because Crow Girl said there was a middle school aged boy there. The only ways this could not be a retcon is if Hikaru lied, Crow Girl lied, or crows really can't see well at night

Next chapter: Hikaru lets Aqua stab him but it bounces off because Nino, who wanted to protect her buddy, secretly made his suit knife proof. Ai's toothbrush turns out to be pivotal to the plot because if only she had used an electric toothbrush as dentists recommend, none of this would have happened.

[pillarsalt]

I was seeing so much hate for radfems that I finally decided to check it for myself and the amount of misinformation about your group is crazy. The whole "radfems love beauty standards" touted everywhere but I see more posts denouncing the beauty industry in a day by radfems than I ever do everywhere else because people implode if you say that shaving is bad. The "radfems love being victims and want to remain victims" thing when it's women giving each other advice on to leave abusive relationships. Like. It's insane. I've seen bad parts of it that were victim blamey or racist but the overwhelming majority is just feminism. Good feminism that criticizes society as a whole. And more black and racial minority women than anywhere else on tumblr. I feel like I was immensely lied to. I'm less alarmist about trans people and I think that calling them slurs or disrespecting them is unnecessary but truthfully it is awful that sex has been erased from talks about feminism. I have no idea what kind of parallel reality everybody lives in because I found myself agreeing with a ton of things radfems say and I even believe that the people wrongfully calling you out would agree too if they listened.

Thanks for this message anon, and thanks for making the choice to look into things for yourself instead of just going along with what everyone tells you. Very few people who hate "terfs"/feminists actually understand our points of view, because it's forbidden to even briefly read or listen to what we have to say, the reasoning being that we'll somehow magically "indoctrinate" you. No one's allowed to hear us, so when asked "but why are they so bad?" they have to make up random bullshit that has nothing to do with what we believe. The real reason is because our arguments are quite basically common sense approaches to women's rights and pattern recognition when it comes to differences in male and female experiences. It's hard to un-see what was right in front of your eyes the whole time.

I'll add that I personally don't think calling trans people or anyone else slurs is acceptable. I do think a lot of women on the feminist side of tumblr have a lot of anger and resentment built up towards men who identify as trans because of the misogyny they've seen come out of the trans movement, anger I honestly think is justified. The moral high ground is always the best road to take, but after having womanhood mansplained to you for the hundredth time as a collection of regressive stereotypes because you're just a stupid bigot cis bitch and you wouldn't get it, yeah being a bit mean in return is understandable. I still think it's unnecessary to use slurs.

I really agree with your last point, there's a reason that feminist rhetoric is so suppressed on both sides of the political spectrum. Consciousness raising is so important, caring about women is important. No matter how hard they try to silence us, women will keep talking to each other and women will continue to wake up to the lies they're being fed.

[chuitu]

August 9 2XXX

Written by: (compiled and edited by Anon)

Users: Yeva Moon & Hóng Hái'er

Uploaded: ????

File Corruption: Null (Restoration_complete)

{User: Yeva Moon}

It has been... 2.. 3 weeks since Mr. Nezha helped me flee from the Celestial realm, I often wonder if he is alright after i shot him.. He told me to.. But now I'm worried.. But first... my priority is to.. hide.

Celestial guards roaming from above, some checked the alleys, Nowhere is safe for me to hide... what now...?

Until now, I am disappointed... Mr. Li Jing... Mr. Lao Tzu... All the misters and missuses, They only saw me as a weapon to be used, they never really cared about me... All those things they told me, how they care... They lied, does this mean my friends were no different?

Liars, Liars all of them LIARS.

I want to rest... All this evading is draining my energy... I can't go home to mama... The Celestials will be expecting me there...

Then, there's only one person left...

{User: Hóng Hái'er}

My Captain actually gave me the time off for today... Thank Buddha i get to breathe, I didn't think i could go another hour without feeling the absolute dread of overtime, I wish i was being dramatic but i barely had the time to sit down at the time,

Well now me and a couple of my squad mates are simply lazing around at a diner, Rez really decided to order 40 dumplings, as if he could chow it down in one go... aie... I'm gonna head out for this one, just vaguely imagining him forcefully shoving dumplings up his mouth had ruined my appetite..

Well, the streets are pretty peaceful for once, glancing at the noodle shop me and Yeva used to go as children... Some random green biker girl just parked up front, giving a boy with a red bandana a bear hug... seeing those two makes me a little.. lonely..

Sometimes i still wonder why or where Yeva went, We haven't talked in a... long, long while, how long had it been... 120 years? Does she even have her phone with her? I kinda stopped texting her 50 years back... she never replies, not even a seen.. Was it my fault? Was Father right? Did she just simply abandon me the moment she heard about my powers being dead gone?

Eventually i.. came the conclusion of believing that it is so...

{User: Yeva Moon}

I found a... little crossroad, If i cross this.. and then one more lane, I'll see my Comrade again..

I wonder how he's been.. Haven't been able to text him because of Mr. Li Jing taking my phone away... I hope Comrade isn't mad from me not replying to his messages... if he left any...

What will Comrade think when he sees me again... I'm not sure what kind of face he'll make, it's been so long.. I hope he's not angry with me...

{User: Hóng Hái'er}

Managed to get off the next train out of Dinsun District, sigh..

What a day, I might finally have the time to spend some quality time with my parents,, well not a saying that they might be having their time without me casually walking in on them... doing.. parent... things... eugh.

I turned another corner, I just.. went blank,, I'm not sure what i was looking at, or rather who it was.. Y.. Yeva?

{User: Yeva Moon}

I found him... Redson, my Comrade.. He looks, confused.. I would normally be overjoyed to see him again... but... i can't feel anything, but relief... just that atleast..

He was about to say something.. but.. he stopped... he looked confused, he looks angry..? he looks tired..

{User: Hóng Hái'er}

I couldn't believe it, Yeva is.. She's actually back,, But i can't help but feel... conflicted, where was she all these years, why didn't she ever answer my calls or messages even once, why did she leave in the first place...

But i just felt, so tired, fatigued from endless hours of scouting and missions... and to think she suddenly comes back out of the blue??? I... I don't know... what to feel about this...

[Answerkey_selected...]

▄ Begrudged

□ Forgiving but conflicted

{User: Yeva Moon}

He said... Where have you been all this time... where were you when i needed you... i was alone.. you were my only friend... how could you abandon me like that... didn't even say hi, hello, how are you... nothing... You probably left because i'm nothing but a weakling to you now, isn't it?... his voice... hurt my ears.. it's... raining..

Ah wanted to tell him why i couldn't answer him... but... it seems... he won't believe a word i say... and.. he.. just left..

{User: Hóng Hái'er}

So eventually i left... I... I couldn't even begin to look at her... some friend she was.. I can't believe her... I feel so betrayed..

{User: Yeva Moon}

Comrade... left me in the rain... It's my fault... he's angry with me... because i left... without words... I abandoned him.. It's all my fault...

{File.Error__Restoration_complete}

-- End Log --

[mr-payjay]

analysis of oj's thought process in this scene for funsies (quick warning for suitcase being put down and seen as inferior by another but it's not character neg)

why is oj being a massive fucking bitch? 🤔 Let's analyze.

so, obviously oj is living off a power trip in this episode. interesting implications about his actual power as a hotel owner. actually, at the beginning of the episode, we can see that he is NOT RESPECTED. salt lies about cleaning up, pepper demands him where the towels are (and he smugly lets her enter the DEATH TRAP DOOR? implying a familiar but negative relationship), and in general oj (and paper sort of but that's not relevant) seems to be the only caretaker while the rest of the residents are more like customers. though it seems they are *meant* to help out (such as salt being supposed to clean).

anyway. once oj gets the temporary host role for inanimate insanity, he immediately gets excited. we transition to the scene outside the hotel and he even does a little twirl! oj starts to read off the paper mephone uses (which oj has happily vandalized with drawings of himself and a snarky little message, this points to his general disdain towards mephone) and is trying to go Smoothly through with it. once the teams start fighting, he doesn't even try to figure out who's telling the truth, preferring instead to eliminate a random person. he REALLY likes to be efficient with his time, huh? that's talked about more in the next paragraph, but in this one i'll say a bit about his hatred for inanimate insanity. for the whole episode, he is uncaring of the show's rules, guidelines, structures, etc. he eliminates someone at random, he makes the contestants clean the hotel NOT as a challenge then flips a coin to determine the loser (only after they question him), he makes them sing for no reason other than to be entertained, he zips through every step as fast as possible. he does not care at all about ii, despite being so eager to host it. why? because hosting it means he gets to boss around a group of people (and he can make them clean his hotel! something he really needs help with!!), he gets to take mephone's place and mess with his stuff and disrespect his show, and generally he gets to sort of... take out some of his lasting frustrations surrounding ii. i don't think ANY of the season one cast is fond of inanimate insanity (and especially not of mephone), even if it brought them together (also not always a good thing). oj certainly isn't.

once he picks suitcase, he starts by calling her "whats-your-face" (thank you for noticing mari), then a few seconds later calls her by her actual name. thissss is so interesting to me. he KNOWS her name, apparently. but he called her a mean name first. this can either imply that he forgot, that he's just being a jerk for the hell of it, or both. i think it's both. a mix of his obsession with productivity and his need to be superior motivates this. he wants to get the elimination over with as quickly as possible, so quickly that he doesn't even bother to remember her name right away, because he's SO efficient that he just simply Doesn't have time for these things (in his mind). so it makes him feel both superior to her (disrespecting her), makes him feel good about himself (he feels like he's just being Productive and Time Efficient and part of that is that he has "no time" to do anything else but work). basically, he DID forget her name for like, a singular second, he just didn't bother to wait a moment or correct himself instead of calling her something else.

and for telling suitcase she's ruining the show? let's bring it back to ii1. oj insults people whenever he feels like it. he's pretty mean, and he's worse when he's stressed. he insults people particularly for being "useless" (such as to bomb), and is quick to fight back against anyone who challenges him. a pushover like suitcase is easy to demean. and it makes him respect her even less when she's being so meek! oj thinks his snappishness is justified by the fact he's, once more, simply being time efficient ("we've got a busy schedule!"), and that she is just wasting his time. i said earlier that oj doesnt respect inanimate insanity. so why does he accuse her of ruining the show if he doesn't care about it? well, because this is *his* episode. his time to be the host. even if he disregards the usual way things run, he's still going to get upset if something conflicts with *his* plans. he wants to get this over with and get them to clean his hotel, not much else (again, he's still enjoying being in a position of authority, he just likes to be nonchalant about how Superior and Powerful he is now). if someone's interrupting that, he's going to assert himself. oj always fights back against anyone who challenges him, and suitcase is too much of a doormat to stop him from shutting her down.

now for oj telling her to step back. this part is petty. he's irritated but also kind of. happy about being irritated. "what," you say? well, see, suitcase is genuinely trying to follow his directions. she just doesn't know how *much* to step back, obviously. so oj keeps shooing her a little bit at a time until she's finally offscreen, and you can tell he's a little bit annoyed by it. but this is part of the power & superiority once more! he gets to boss around someone "inferior to him" who is just soooo stupid that she doesn't even know where to go. and oj has to shoo her over and over because she's just not getting it (since he is sooo very much smarter than her and she is just completely incapable of following OBVIOUS directions.) but it's okay she is simply a Minor inconvenience (in his head) that he has dealt with now. also note that he could've just pointed to where she had to go. does this paragraph make sense? he likes being able to tell others what to do and have them do it, so even if she's kind of annoying him by not completely understanding the instructions, he still gets to assert his authority quite a bit.

this analysis is particularly focused on the scene in the video but i do bring up some other parts of the episode to support it.

[avionvadion]

Am I the only that found the canon explanations for why the characters go to Playful Land and are in town for the Nightmare Before Christmas event extremely forced and almost OOC in some cases? Yuu, Adeuce and Grim deciding to randomly hang out with Floyd seemed random, especially since they never spent time together before. Leona, Jack and Vil don't seem like the sorts to decide to go there, even the explanations the game provided. Those aren't even the half of them. Are you planning to handle that differently in yours?

....Probably??? I'm sorry. I really do think it makes sense, because they're all connected through each other- Floyd through Ace, Leona through Jack, and Vil through Ortho (as it technically is taking place after Book Six since Ortho is a proper student at the time of this event).

Yuu and Grim are friends with Ace, who both went to support his Basketball Club event. Floyd is in the basketball club with Ace. Leona went to keep an eye on Jack because he knew Jack wasn't acting like himself (literally points out that Jack is acting out-of-character and that it's suspicious) and Vil goes to keep an eye on Ortho, who is, at that point in time, part of the film club, because everything he was told Fellow had said sounded highly suspicious but the fact that Ortho couldn't detect any lies was even more so. Jade and Floyd live for the excitement.

Any changes out of character are pointed out by other characters and are acknowledged to be a result of Fellow's Unique Magic. As we have other characters (Jamil, Jade, Ruggie) who can control minds and/or bodies, it's not that much of a stretch.

I don't really think it's random/forced at all. Everyone is connected via through clubs, childhood friendships, or family, and any and all oddities in personality are pointed out and acknowledged by other characters, and are then explained to be the result of someone's magic.

As for if I'm going to handle anything different...

Ortho and Vil.

As I'm going to be writing it after Book Two that means Ortho is not an official student and is therefore not part of the Film Club, and has little to no connection to Vil. I might have to have Vil get involved through Jack. Vil and Leona have a habit of bickering, and Vil and Jack are childhood friends.

Now, for Nightmare Before Christmas' event.... eh, maybe a little. I haven't gone ham in my notes about the plot for it yet save for my Skully rewrite so I don't remember the explanations for them all being there very well. (Save for Riddle and Trey, Malleus and Sebek, Idia, and... I wanna say Vil and Epel??? OH WAIT Jade and Azul I remember too. Wait, is that all of them??? OH JAMIL. Jamil lost Kalim, I think???)

Hold up...

Riddle and Trey- mannerism books for Adeuce (and Sebek).

Malleus and Sebek- invited Yuu because Mr. Horns wanted to look for something new to read and Sebek tagged along.

Vil and Epel- the former lent the latter some of his old text books, I think, and they went to get copies of them since they're not in most stores nowadays???

Jamil- something something, lost Kalim

Idia- MANGAAAAAA.

LEONA. Why is he there???? I don't remember.

Azul and Jade- looking for Halloween books.

AHA THAT'S ELEVEN. Okay, so the only one I don't really remember why he's there is Leona. Hmmm. Oh well. I'll figure it out. I'm going to have to rewrite Azul and Jade's reasoning for being there, anyways, since I'm going to have it take place in November after Book Three.

[bbgnyx]

prompt list~

ok so here are random prompts, mention the skz member + the number with genre and message me! feel free to add any details you want! open to suggestions as well!

will prolly keep adding more as i come up with it~

Smut~

-01- "Be quiet baby, you don't want anyone to hear us, would you?"

-02- "You'll get to cum when I decide it."

-03- "Keep your eyes on me"

-04- "Be a good girl for daddy hmm and take it all in"

-05- "Let everyone know who you belong to"

-06- "The first one that cums will be punished by the other. Deal?"

-07- "Let me come in you, please. I wanna fill you up."

-08- "Look at what you do to me."

-09- "Show me how you want to be touched, baby"

-10- "I'm gonna fuck you till you can't walk tomorrow"

-11- "I'd hold onto something if I were you"

-12- "Look what you do to me"

-13- "I haven't even touched you and you're already this wet"

-14- "Make me"

-15- "C'mere, sit on my lap"

-16- "You're not going out in that outfit"

-17- "You're so fucking hot when you're mad"

-18-"If you don't like my teasing, then why are you mad?"

-19- "I really wanna kiss you and do unimaginable things to you right now"

-20- "Playing hard to get hmm? that's cute"

~♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡~

Fluff~

-01- "Where's my good-night kiss?"

-02- "I saw something today that reminded me of you"

-03- "I'm not leaving you. Ever."

-04- "Marry me"

-05- "Dance with me?"

-06- "It's always been you"

-07- "Thank you." "For what?" "Just thank you."

-08- "It's us against the world."

-09- "I miss you"

-10- "I want to spend the day with you, doing nothing"

-11- "You're hair is really soft after you wash it"

-12- "Star-gazing was a good idea"

-13- "I've never noticed that mole on your nose, it's really cute"

-14- "Quit smiling at me, I can't stop messing up my sentences when you look at me like that."

-15- "You're so cute." "What did you just say". "I just said you look like a boot"

-16- "I love hearing you're voice"

-17- "It's my turn to cook tonight"

-18- "I wish i could spend more time with you"

-19- "Can we just stay like this?"

-20- "If you tickle me one more time, I swear you're not getting any kisses or cuddles for a week"

~♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡~

Angst~

-01- "What changed?" "I don't feel the same way I did anymore."

-02- "I cheated on you."

-03- "I'll always pick her....i'm sorry"

-04- "Why does this sound like goodbye?" "Because it is."

-05- "Did you ever love me?"

-06- "Y-You don't remember me?"

-07- “Just let me see him one more time. please.”

-08- "I'm sorry. I'll never be good enough for you."

-09- "It probably doesn't mean anything to you, but I love you."

-10- "Love is full of lies"

-11- "Is this what I get for loving you?"

-12- "Am I finally a hero?

-13- "I'm done helping you!"

-14- "I was only using you"

-15- "I'm scared"

-16- "I'm sorry that I love you"

-17- "Do you remember we were once happy together?"

-18- "I love you"

-19- "I guess forever was a word meant for memories and not for people"

~♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡~

[kingdomoftyto]

Hi, happy spooky month, I have a ✨manga rec✨!! And in the spirit of the season, it's a horror story! >:3c

I want to spoil as little as possible because I went into this manga essentially COMPLETELY blind and, honestly, imho, I imagine it's the ideal way to experience the story. I literally first heard about it from a random youtube comment on a video about an entirely different manga--one which, mind you, had VERY different themes, which colored my preconceptions and added to the surprises for me later on!

ANYWAY, what I mean by all that is I'm going to start with the simplest possible summary of the premise, and if that's intriguing enough for you to give it a shot, then I recommend diving right in!! But, if you still need more of an in-depth, slightly spoilery rec? Then I'll gush a bit more under a cut to see if I can hook your attention.

With all that out of the way,

The Summer Hikaru Died is a horror/supernatural story about a high school boy named Yoshiki whose best friend (Hikaru) went missing in the mountains outside of town. What comes back is... something else. It looks, acts, and talks like Hikaru, but it's not him, and Yoshiki is the only one who seems to notice.

The only other thing I knew going in was that the commenter made a brief mention of the "Hikaru"-thing protecting Yoshiki, which seemed odd but intriguing alongside the rest of the premise.

So if that's enough for you (plus the fact that I'm telling you I haven't stopped thinking about this story since I read it two weeks ago), then please check it out! There are only 5 volumes so far!! Suffer through the wait for the rest with meeeeee ಥωಥ

More spoilery extended rec below the cut:

📣THESE MOTHERFUCKERS GAY*!!!📣

📣GOOD📣FOR📣THEM!!!📣

I know what you're thinking, and YES, it appears to be BL between the TIMID HIGH SCHOOL BOY and the ELDRITCH HORROR WEARING THE SKIN OF HIS BEST FRIEND.

And it's SO GOOD.

No SERIOUSLY, for real though, I had NO inkling going into this that it was even in the realm of possibility that it would involve romance

Let alone a nuanced, slow burn, VERY QUEER romance layered with ruminations on grief and identity and one's relationship to society

(ON THIS NOTE, I must advise up front that I DO NOT KNOW if this story will end in tragedy... It's still ongoing, after all! BUT, I think either way it will be an amazing story and... maybe I'm just delusional, and though this may be considered spoilery in itself, the most recent chapters have me optimistic that we might indeed be on track for some sort of happy ending... eventually.)

Anyway, I cannot express enough how incredible it was to uncover this aspect of the story organically without knowing about it beforehand. Born and raised in a rural village, Yoshiki is deep in the closet, and that's reflected in how subtle the hints are at the beginning. Over time, it starts to become clearer and clearer, but always with a layer of plausible deniability, at least if you're not expecting it to take such a queer turn. ("Hikaru" literally makes a ton of "no homo" style jokes early on, which... god don't get me started--)

As you might guess, Yoshiki had feelings for the real Hikaru before his disappearance, and ooh boy does that affect how much the grief and guilt and fear play into things. It's delightfully fucked up.

So yeah. I 100% expected the plot of this manga to revolve around the intrigue of the monster finding out Yoshiki knew its secret, the fear of not knowing when the monster would strike next, etc, but NO! That particular "reveal" happens within the first 10 pages, and then the entity just kind of... lives the life of a high school kid! He's kind of a little shit, but for the most part, he's a nice boy! Yoshiki is the only one who knows who "Hikaru" really is, but much of the tension comes from him having to come to terms with that, rather than the fear itself.

...and also the OTHER horrors and mysteries. There's tension there too, considering it's where the actual plot lies, lmAO. Just because "Hikaru" isn't a totally evil monster doesn't mean there aren't a lot of grotesque and scary things in here. Most of this manga I would classify more in the "supernatural" genre than "horror", but in those moments it DOES delve into horror, it goes pretty damn hard. I remember more than one moment where I felt sharp regret about reading it in the dark at 2 a.m. 💀

Still, if you dare, it's worth the read. I can't recommend it enough.

P.S. I wouldn't say it's a "funny" manga but it does nonetheless have an amazing sense of humor. There are a handful of actual jokes and gags that did have me rolling, but more importantly there's an unspoken, implicit acknowledgement of how absurd this all is, in that way only good self-aware horror can achieve. Take the main character Yoshiki for example. The image I used of him up above? The unsettling camera angle, the haunted look in his eyes? That's just how he always looks. The panel after that one shows that all he's looking at on his phone is a text from his sister reminding him to pick up wasabi flakes.

P.P.S. There's apparently an anime adaptation coming out sometime? I'll probably watch it, but I expect something will be lost in translation. We'll see, I suppose.

*- To be precise: Yoshiki is gay. The creature that takes Hikaru's place has a more nuanced (and alien) perspective on sexuality, and... I'll leave it at that.