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viviennevermillion · 1 year

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ꜱᴛᴀʀᴛ ᴏꜰ ꜱᴏᴍᴇᴛʜɪɴɢ ɢᴏᴏᴅ

❝ you see my heart i wear it on my sleeve, 'cause i just can't hide it anymore. i know that it's gonna take some time; i've got to admit that the thought has crossed my mind: this might end up like it should ❞ — daughtry

ᴄᴏɴᴛᴀɪɴꜱ: character x gn!reader, ideal dates

ᴄʜᴀʀᴀᴄᴛᴇʀꜱ: alhaitham, baizhu, capitano, cyno, diluc, dottore, kaveh, pantalone, tighnari, wanderer

ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢꜱ: dottore's ideal date includes observing his creepy mad scientist experiments. he's sweet to reader but very much not a good person in this and neither are you

ɴᴏᴛᴇꜱ: guess who is back? thought hitting 4.5k followers might be a good time to break my 3 month genshin hiatus and comeback with a 10 character headcanon post. comments and reblogs are appreciated! you're also always welcome to shoot me an ask about my works! 💙

ᴅɴɪ: ᴅᴀʀᴋ ᴄᴏɴᴛᴇɴᴛ ᴄᴏɴꜱᴜᴍᴇʀꜱ, ʏᴀɴᴅᴇʀᴇ ᴇɴᴛʜᴜꜱɪᴀꜱᴛꜱ, ʙʟᴏɢꜱ ᴡɪᴛʜ ɴꜱꜰᴡ ᴜꜱᴇʀɴᴀᴍᴇꜱ ᴀɴᴅ ᴘꜰᴘ

Alhaitham isn’t really the type to go out of his way to take you on dates if there isn’t a special occasion. Before the two of you got together, he would often ask you whether you’d like to go to the tavern with him after he finished up work or join him in the library. Once in a while you’d take a walk together and sometimes after you spent time, Alhaitham would invite you over to dinner at his house, apologising for his roommate in advance even though you found Kaveh to be not even half as unpleasant as Alhaitham thought he was.

“Dates” with Alhaitham always retain this character of a loose and relaxed hangout with a good friend, even throughout your relationship. Of course, Alhaitham will pay attention to your needs and make sure you don’t doubt his love for you, but he doesn’t really care for the conventional idea of a date. He mostly wants to spend time with you.

For Alhaitham the most important part of your dates are the conversations. He wouldn’t have fallen for you if he doesn’t love to have long, in-depth conversations with you about whatever comes to mind. It doesn’t matter if you’re as well-versed in a subject as he is with language; as long as you’re able to hold your own in a discussion with him, he’ll have a good time. If you manage to answer something clever and humorous to a question he asks you, you might get a chuckle out of him. It’s how you found out that Alhaitham actually has a very warm laugh that makes you feel content in his presence.

Being with Alhaitham means that sometimes you forget the fact that you’re even on a date. You’re so immersed in the conversation with him, his hand placed on top of yours as he takes another sip of his coffee, that the environment around you just fades away; whether you’re out in the forests or having a meal at the tavern.

Just make sure to not take Alhaitham to places that are too loud or too crowded. He prefers a quiet and calm atmosphere where he can focus on you and his thoughts. After all, he came here for some quality time with the person he loves rather than listening to a drunk scholar’s misadventures at the table next to him. He brings his noise-cancelling headphones along with him, but he still makes sure to get the two of you a quiet place away from the busy chatter of the townfolk.

Alhaitham loves to take you to Akademiya exhibitions or ruins in the desert. He’s well-aware that sitting over a book for hours and researching a topic may not be everybody’s cup of tea, so he likes going out with you to places where you can actually see the things he studies while he explains them to you. He’ll show you ancient scriptures and patiently tells you what they mean and why they were written.

Those days typically end with the two of you enjoying a nice meal that Alhaitham cooked at home and you resting your head in his lap; tired from all the walking and exploring, as your significant other picks up one of his books to read. You close your eyes and he places one hand on your back and lets you rest close to him. If you have any questions about the book he’s reading or need anything, don’t hesitate to ask him. He’ll answer if it’s you.

Baizhu would love to spend his day exploring Liyue with you, taking you to all the beautiful places you haven’t seen yet. But unfortunately, due to his condition, this isn’t always possible. He apologizes for this way more than he should. You and Changsheng tend to scold him for this. You’d cup his face in your hands and press a kiss to his lips. “As long as I’m with you, I’m having the time of my life”, you reassure him with a gentle voice and litter his face with soft kisses to drive the point home. With every kiss, Baizhu grows more flustered but his smile becomes wider. “Very well then”, he coughs and pulls you into a hug, “if you say so, I’ll hold you to it.”

Baizhu likes to go on spa dates with you. He takes you to a thermal bath in Liyue Harbor. You have to remind him that he already explained the health benefits of spa treatment to you multiple times, or he’ll do it again. Doctor’s habits. You chuckle at how he puts a hand on his neck and stumbles over his words when you two finish his sentence in sync; him having completely forgotten how familiar you already are with his medical rambles.

You two relax in the brine bath as slow music plays along with quiet white noise. Baizhu leans back against the wall of the pool and lets out a relaxed sigh.

Changsheng is resting on a miniature beach chair you insisted to bring along because you “thought it was cute”.

You twirl a strand of Baizhu’s long hair around your finger. “You’re so beautiful with your hair down”, you breathe and pull him into a deep kiss, which Baizhu readily accepts. “You keep telling me”, he chuckles but avoids looking into your eyes. “Well it’s true”, you insist and Baizhu once more can’t believe how you look at him like he’s the most precious thing you have ever laid eyes on. “You should have seen him the first time you told him that”, Changsheng raises her voice, “he was a flustered mess but he’s been smiling for days afterwards.” “I- Did you have to tell them that?”, Baizhu sighs. “This is still tame compared to that time she told me that you had to redo my prescription because you absentmindedly drew a heart next to my name”, you laugh and Baizhu’s head turns towards his snake companion in shock. “You did what-”

You’re giggling at this point. Baizhu just lets out a disappointed sigh,

“Did you know that the salt in a brine bath can help with various skin and even lung diseases and is a tried and tested remedy for them?”, Baizhu asks as you make another amateur attempt at braiding his hair. “Yes, you told me”, you kiss his cheek, smiling against his skin. “The high concentration of salt in the water also makes you float effortlessly, if you lie down in the water.” Against your protests, Baizhu makes you abandon your masterpiece (a loose braid you improvised without any idea what you’re doing) and holds you as you lean back, letting you float on the water as you look up to the ceiling. It’s the first time you notice that the owners of the establishment have actually crafted the ceiling above the pool to look like the night sky; false stars sparkling above anyone who might come to be in your position right now. “Isn’t it beautiful?”, Baizhu, who had been looking up to the ceiling, remarks. When his eyes meet yours again, he realizes your attention had already shifted. “You’re supposed to look at the ceiling, not my face”, he chuckles but you protest and brush a strand of hair behind his ear. “Got distracted”, you wink and Baizhu leans down to press a kiss to your lips.

The two of you spend a relaxing day at the spa, sharing herbal tea and ending up in each other’s arms at every possible opportunity.

Capitano, on a day off from his duties as a Fatui Harbinger, prefers to spend the majority of hours at home with you; alone, where he can take off his mask. You’re the only one he has trusted to take it off around in a very long time. A small price to pay for your affection; the way you kiss his lips softly as if he was fragile, even though most would regard him as a monster. Throughout his lifetime he had internalized that his hands were ones meant to kill and lead his men into battle. How ironic it was then, how gentle Capitano was with you. How he held your face in his big hands and looked at you with unmatched adoration in his eyes, whispering how much he loved you while pressing kisses to your forehead.

Capitano likes to take you to the botanical gardens of Zapolyarny Palace. It’s a little project of his; taking care of some of the gardening in his freetime, planting new flowers and making sure they thrive even in a nation such as Snezhnaya. When you first met the Captain, you never expected a man like him to have a hobby like this, but now that you knew, you found it endearing. Just one more thing that you adored about the man.

Capitano takes your hand into his and the two of you take a walk through the garden. He has been working on it for over a decade now and you can tell that he is proud of the result, especially when he gets to see that you find it beautiful and like to visit. After having relied on brute force in his profession for a long time and with the sheer strength Capitano had, it was difficult at first to tend to small, fragile beings such as plants. But everyone has to start somewhere right?

Capitano, being one of the strongest and also one of the most trusted harbingers, has been sent abroad on a mission in the name of the Tsaritsa countless times. An entire shelf in his bedroom is just filled with travel logs that you love to browse through on a relaxing day together like this. You’ll be snuggled up in his arms, skimming through the pages and letting Capitano explain the story behind the pictures he took and the paragraphs he wrote. It was like each time you did this, you learned another new thing to love about him. For someone who was sent into war and all kinds of mysterious dealings, Capitano’s travel logs were surprisingly ordinary. They included the food he had for dinner in a foreign nation, how he witnessed the locals dance at a festival and the natural phenomenons he wanted to make note of. Perhaps these were the things that stuck with him; the experiences he wanted to remember.

In the evenings, Capitano takes you stargazing. Throughout his lonesome strive across Teyvat, the stars had been his trusted companion. Therefore, he knew quite a lot about the constellations and how to use them to navigate. He’d be happy to explain it to you or just sit there with you in silence by the side of a campfire, watching as a shooting star trails across the sky. “Are you going to make a wish?”, you ask, smiling at him from the side. Capitano shakes his head and takes your hand into his. “I have everything I want for as long as I have you.”

If you ask Cyno to pick a date idea, you know full well where this is going. You could have just asked “which deck are you going to use for Genius Invokation TCG today?” because that will be what you’re going to be doing if you let Cyno pick. If you’re as enthusiastic about the game as he is, even better.

The two of you could have a picnic or visit the tavern to play against other people, Cyno leaves that choice to you. He brings all of his cards, safely concealed within a limited edition Genius Invokation TCG card box, and you’re one of the only people who’s allowed to play with his most rare cards and the ones with a holographic layer.

He may ramble about how he obtained them and how the intricate design is symbolic for xy plotline in King of Invokations, his favorite novel, but that’s just how he is. A joke here and there, a TCG novel quote thrown in; if you indulge him and encourage him he’s over the moon for you, although he’s making a (bad) attempt at keeping it together.

If he plays against other people, he’s expecting you to back him up. Knowing you have his back and are cheering him on makes Cyno even more dedicated to win. “The strength you see now does not come from the fortune of my cards, but instead from within; a heart determined to not fail the loved ones who have put their trust in me”, Cyno’s expression becomes more serious as he puts his cards on the table in front of his opponents, “this is a quote from ‘King of Invokations’ that I have felt deeply the first time I read it.” You repress a chuckle and simply leave a kiss on his cheek before getting up to grab your drinks from the tavern counter.

“I believe I have earned myself a kiss”, Cyno smiles at you triumphantly after winning against the group of people he met at the tavern. “I don’t remember promising you one as a reward”, you tease and he smirks, crossing his arms in front of his chest. “Well I suppose if you don’t want to, it can’t be helped-”

He’s unsurprised by how you pull him into your arms, locking your lips with his and burying your fingers in his soft white hair. Cyno smiles into the kiss, squeezing your hand gently. The way he reciprocates your gesture shows how much love he feels for you in this moment.

Cyno only becomes more smitten the more you compliment him for his TCG strategies and his hard-won victories; feeling his heart beat faster as you trail a couple of light kisses down his neck. “I had no doubts you would win”, you smile against his soft skin and Cyno rests his forehead against yours. “Whether I win or lose, for as long as I am privy to your love, I will emerge from every duel victorious”, Cyno whispers and you laugh. “I can’t believe you’re still using King of Invokations quotes to flirt with me.” “They worked better back when you hadn’t read the novels yet”, he lets out a sigh, “it was the price that had to be paid for making you familiar with the lore around Genius Invokation TCG.” You chuckle and wrap an arm around his waist, nuzzling his cheek. “In turn, you can imagine my surprise when I read them for the first time and recognized some of the most memorable things you had said to me…tsk tsk, Cyno, you have to be more original.” Cyno takes your hand into his and looks into your eyes with an earnest look. “In my defense, I remembered them when I spent time with you and they happened to perfectly describe how I feel for you”, he explains before his lips met yours once more.

Cyno spends the afternoon helping you improve your own Genius Invokation TCG playstyle and he shares some snacks ordered from the tavern with you. You can see that he’s passionate and enjoys every second of this date, even if he tries to play it cool. His still obvious excitement is enough of a reward for you, even if you don’t win the game.

Diluc keeps things classic when he plans a date with you. He’ll take a walk with you through Mondstadt, especially on days when the city hosts a market with fresh food and handmade crafts to look at while you enjoy a nice and sunny day in the City of Freedom.

If you have your eyes on anything, Diluc might get it for you. He enjoys seeing the smile on your face when he hands the item to you. Diluc has more than enough Mora and if he can use it to add a little joy to your day? That’s all he could hope for. The cool summer breeze and bustling market reminds him of days long gone, when he’d go to the city with his father to promote the drinks created at Dawn Winery. If he’s feeling comfortable enough around you, he might even tell you about it.

“Ah, young Master Diluc…I haven’t seen you stop by in a while”, an older man calls out to Diluc as the two of you pass his stall, “and you must be y/n, right? I remember how quickly word spread throughout the town when it became official that Mondstadt’s richest bachelor had finally settled down. There were a lot of disappointed young ladies, let me tell you…” Diluc awkwardly chuckles and takes your hand in his. “This is Ralf. He’s been putting up this stall at least once a month ever since I can remember”, Diluc explains. The man laughs and turns to you. “You should have seen him when he was just a wee little lad. His father would always buy a bag of cinnamon curd balls for him and Cavalry Captain Kaeya at my stall and the two of them would fight over it as if it was their last meal on death row.” You chuckle at the image of Diluc and Kaeya having a brotherly quarrell over something as simple as baked goods. Although, imagining them as children, it seemed quite on brand for the two. “Ah, that”, Diluc runs a hand through his hair and looks up to the sky as he recalls the memories that seem so far out of reach by now, “looking back on it, it seems like such a trivial matter.”

As you leave through the city gates, Diluc holds your hand all the way back to the winery and if you ask him about it, he’ll tell you more about those simple days of the past when he’d visit the city on the weekends with his family; even smiling fondly at the memory despite the pain in his heart about the death of his father and the estrangement from Kaeya. You were glad your date together could make him recall the good aspects of those memories.

While you were out in Mondstadt, Diluc’s maids already prepared a nice candlelit dinner for the two of you. Diluc has informed them of what kinds of food you prefer and they will adjust the dishes according to your liking. Over a plate of regional food from Mondstadt, you and Diluc talk about all sorts of topics that have come up recently, and Diluc makes sure to also convey his feelings to you through his words more thoroughly than usual. As soon as you finished eating, Diluc sits down with you on the couch and lets you rest in his arms as you continue your conversation from the dinner table. The maids light up even more candles to provide for a romantic atmosphere and quiet instrumental music sounds from the record player.

Diluc lets his hair down and lets out a sigh. On days like these he decides to let the Darknight Hero rest for a night. After all you deserve for the conclusion of your day together to be sleeping in his arms throughout the night. You rest your head on his shoulder and watch the calming flames of the fireplace as Diluc runs his fingertips up and down your arm. “I apologize if I haven’t spent as much time with you lately”, Diluc whispers and pulls you into a kiss, “please know that I missed you dearly and I love you with all my heart.” You peck at his lips a couple times before reassuring him that you already know. “I love you too, Diluc.”

If you decided to date the mad scientist who earns his wages by experimenting on people you should have seen that one coming but Dottore’s idea of date night includes sharing the research with you that he’s so passionate about.

He lets you pick the experiment. Is there anything you ever wanted to know about the human soul? Our behaviours and motivations? Or perhaps the powers of the gods? The truth of this world? Look no further, because your beloved Zandik is going to get you some answers to them through his rather….unconventional methods. After all, knowledge is the one thing he strives for above all else; and as such it shouldn’t be kept away from the person he loves as well. Whatever knowledge you seek to have, Dottore will happily help you to obtain it.

“We don’t have all day, y/n. The experiment is scheduled to begin in a couple of minutes”, he sighs and reminds you to hurry up as you give your affection to at least five of his clones that passed you by on your way to the lab. They were always yearning for your attention; as Prime Dottore received most of it, and who were you to turn them down? “You were the one who thought it was a good idea to try and woo me when there’s at least 20 of you”, you tease and link your arm with the one he held out to you, “or are you getting jealous again?”

Dottore doesn’t respond to your teasing and simply takes the elevator to the underground laboratory with you. He wraps his arms around you and looks into the mirror inside the elevator at how the two of you looked together. The fact that a man like him who had taken so many lives was now so adamant about protecting and nurturing just one brought a chuckle to his lips. “I thought you said that you cleared the lab out safe for your clones”, you remark, “don’t you think it’s time to take that mask off?”

Dottore indulges you and does as you say. You cup his face in your hands. “I still don’t understand why you’d hide a face this beautiful behind a mask”, you smile and press some soft kisses to the scars on his temple. Dottore’s lips meet yours and he wraps his arms tighter around you, unwilling to let go of you just yet. He kisses you passionately. Your fingertips are buried in the soft teal hair that falls into his neck and Dottore sighs into the kiss, no intention of ending it anytime soon.

“I thought you said we don’t have all day?”, you smirk, pushing him back gently and leading him out of the elevator, “or is that only when I give affection to your segments?” “I’ll let you guess”, Zandik whispers into your ear and presses a kiss to your cheek before heading off the supply closet to get you your lab gear. He actually had it custom-made for you. He explains to you how to wear it properly, as lab safety is very important. “I’ve seen you come in here in a t-shirt and sweatpants”, you raise an eyebrow. “I’m experienced. Let it be of no concern to you. However, seeing you get hurt in my laboratory when the purpose of this day is to provide you with the knowledge you seek is the last thing I’d want.”

He presses a kiss to your hands before he slips the protective gloves onto your fingers.

Before beginning the experiment, Dottore lets you come up with your own hypothesis about the outcome. He’s curious to hear your thoughts and why you have this perspective on the experiment setup. He explains how he set up this particular experiment in response to your questions and lets you read the files of the test subjects.

All in all, Dottore’s research of that day doesn’t differ too much from a regular work day as a Fatui Harbinger, yet he finds himself enjoying to have you around and sharing his findings with you. He makes a note to ask you whether you’d be interested in becoming his assistant permanently.

Kaveh would love to take you out to the theatre to watch a play with you. He loves the atmosphere of the theatre; that he can forget about reality for a moment and just immerse himself in someone else’s story while also being led to think about the matter of the play in more depth. He wants to share this experience with you.

Kaveh is the type to bring you flowers before your date. He knows quite a bit about the language of flowers and carefully selects those kinds that would best convey his feelings for you.

He gets nice seats at a table near the stage of Zubayr Theatre for you and brings some drinks and snacks from the nearest cafe or tavern. Before the play begins, Kaveh reads through the leaflet that Nilou had given to you about this new play that would premiere on the night of your date with Kaveh. “I must say, I am really interested in how the story is going to play out, based on the summary they’re giving here”, Kaveh tells you, “it’s always interesting to see the prompt first and wonder how they’re going to make this work with the costumes and props.”

He goes on to talk about how he’d be sure to help the theatre out if they ever needed any advice on architectural styles during a certain time period or needed some designs for their props; but they have yet to commission him. And of course he rants about how Alhaitham just can’t understand the beauty of the performing arts. “I’m glad you get it though”, Kaveh takes your hand into his as the play is about to begin. You sit closer to him so you’ll be able to rest your head on his shoulder or wrap his arms around his waist while watching the play.

Kaveh is mesmerized by what is happening on stage and sometimes quietly rambles about the design of the costumes or the ways the actors express the emotions of their characters. You smile at him fondly as he’s watching the play, brushing a strand of hair out of his face and finding it amusing how much he’s already lost in the fairytale being shown. Your touch distracts him for a moment and Kaveh turns his head to you and presses a kiss to your lips before returning his attention to the stage.

The two of you laugh and talk a lot on your way back home; discussing all the facets of the play. At the end of the day, Kaveh just wants to be alone with you for a bit and be held in your arms. Luckily Alhaitham isn’t home yet, so Kaveh can avoid any quarrels with his roommate.

Kaveh rests his head on your chest and closes his eyes while you undo his hairstyle and run your hands through the strands on his head. He lets out a relaxed sigh and a smile finds its way to his face. “I love you so dearly”, he whispers and notices how warm your embrace feels. You press a kiss to his forehead. “I love you too, sunshine”, you chuckle and run your fingertips over the exposed skin of his back, which made Kaveh melt into your embrace and relax even more.

You cup his cheek gently and kiss him, pouring all your love for him into the gesture. Kaveh wore his heart on his sleeve around you and you always knew how he felt about you. In turn, you only considered it natural to express your affections for him in the same way. Kaveh longs for someone who feels as deeply about something as him and will understand him and love him the way he is. Today was just another day to prove that finally someone does.

You want to be taken out on a nice date? Well, look no further, because this man is going to go all out for you. Pantalone has all the riches in the world, as far as Mora is concerned, and why wouldn't he spend it on his dearest? It is said that the Regrator has a unique understanding of wealth and Mora is just one facet of that. After all, when it comes to love, isn't what we treasure most the memories with our loved ones? And if he can use his Mora to make this one the most memorable date you've ever been on; that's every reason not to be stingy with it.

It all starts with Pantalone joining you for dinner after his work for the day was done; pulling you into a loving kiss that made you drop whatever it was you were currently doing and just be close to him. Pantalone has always been affectionate with you, but with how clingy and appreciative he is today; you either suspect he had a bad day or just one of those days where his thoughts kept circling back to you and he missed you from the moment he left to the second he was reunited with you. Or perhaps it had to do with your anniversary that was approaching.

He pulls out a leaflet from his bag, putting it down on the table in front of you. You take a look at it, looking back up at him in confusion. "A tailor?", you question, still holding the advertisement in your hands. Pantalone nods. "I have recently met them in the city; their store is very new and quite exquisite. They will be here tomorrow to take a commission from the two of us. I have purchased an establishment in the far north and a ball will be held there on our anniversary. Please make sure to give the tailor a detailed description of the suit or dress you want to wear to it", Pantalone takes your hand into his and squeezes it gently, "please do not hold back. If you want there to be real diamonds on it, there's going to be real diamonds on it."

On the day of your anniversary, Pantalone procured a carriage with a portable heater to take you to your destination. Still, he makes sure to also keep you warm personally, holding you in his arms all the way. He kisses you deeply, pulling you into his lap as he showers you in his love and affection.

Pantalone has a nice suite prepared for the two of you in the luxurious building that the ball is being held in and upon arrival he asks you to change into the outfit that the tailor had prepared for you. "Do notify me when you're done and if you need any help, just call out to me."

However when you step out of the dressing room, Pantalone is nowhere to be found. Your questions are answered just a moment later as he enters the room again, wearing a custom-made luxurious suit and holding a bouquet of roses in his hand. "These are for you, my dearest", he kisses you cheek.

Upon entering the ballroom, you notice there isn't really anyone in it aside from the staff and the musicians that Pantalone hired to play your favorite songs. "Where are all the people?", you wonder. Your lover chuckles. "Darling, did you really believe I was going to put you through boring conversations with foreign emissaries and businessmen today?", he presses a kiss to your temple, then another to your cheek, then another to your neck, "no, this is just for the two of us."

"You're aware that you can just rent a location, right, you don't have to buy the whole thing every time?", you raise an eyebrow at him but let him indulge you. He gives you his signature smile with a hint of mischievousness. "Oh no, you misunderstood me, love, I had this built for you over the course of the last few months." "Wait what-"

Pantalone dances the night away with you and enjoys your favorite food with you that he hired famous chefs to make. If you want to sit down for a while or just kiss him and be in his arms, he's fine with that too.

"I love all of this, but why did we come so far out here for this date?", you ask as Pantalone takes your hand into his and gently rubs the back of it with his thumb. "Well, to top it off, once we're done dancing for the night, I'm going to take you to see the northern lights. They're quite beautiful, although they don't compare to you in the slightest", Pantalone pulls you into a hug, "and after that I'll have the staff prepare a nice bath for the two of us. How does that sound?"

Pantalone loves you with all of his heart and if he feels confident enough that you return his love in full....well there might just be another surprise waiting for you in the form of a diamond ring he brought along.

Tighnari's idea of a nice date includes a hike through the nature of Sumeru's rainforest. If you're not that into hiking, you don't have to go far and you can also walk as slowly as you wish to, Tighnari will adapt to you.

He prepared a picnic for you as well. Some of the food for it he bought at the tavern; a few of the items he made himself. Although….Collei definitely helped.

The two of you eventually stop by a dock near the Apam Woods. “This seems like a good place to rest, don’t you think?”, Tighnari smiles at you and takes his shoes off; sitting down on the dock and letting his feet meet the cold but calming water of the creek while pulling some of the snacks out of his backpack. You sit down next to him. “There’s even a little house here with a cooking pot and a small table on a tree trunk….I wonder who built this here…it’s too small for a human”, you muse and look to Tighnari for answers. “Well, legends speak of an ancient race of small forest creatures connected to the Dendro Archon. Those small houses are scattered all over the rainforest. The people of Sumeru tend to say that they belong to the Aranara. Although I’m not sure how much truth there is to that”, Tighnari shrugs.

You decide for the baklava Collei made as a snack and lean back to let the sun shine on your face. “It’s nice here, isn’t it?”, Tighnari puts his hand over yours, “I just hope none of the adventurers happen to stumble upon me here and go ‘oh Forest Watcher, please help me; I put my hand inside of the mouth of a Rishboland Tiger and now my arm fell off; whatever shall I do?’ this time.” You grin and raise an eyebrow at him. “This wasn’t actually something that happened, right?”, you chuckle. “Kaveh calls that one ‘stylistic exaggeration’, if I recall correctly”, Tighnari laughs. “Fits perfectly with your usual sass”, you tease and your hand wanders to his ears, gently scratching one of them.

“Collei wanted to make a bet with me how long it’s going to take you before you start doing this once we sit down somewhere”, Tighnari sighs, “she said about half an hour. I didn’t even give you 10 minutes.” You pout and reach for his other ear. “I know you like this and you’re so cute, so why shouldn’t I?”, you press a kiss to his cheek, “don’t tell me this still makes you flustered?” “Not anymore, no”, Tighnari affirms but you recall how his cheeks heated up and he stumbled over his words the first few times you did this.

You enjoy your snacks together and get ready to move on but the weather has other plans as the rain pours down on you and your fox-like boyfriend. “I hope the Aranara doesn’t mind us using their house for a while”, you say as you enter the small structure.

Tighnari quickly ends up snuggled against you with his head on your chest and you holding his ears because the thunder hurts in them. “Sorry this hike turned out like this”, he apologizes but you stop him. “It’s not like you can control the weather or something”, you chuckle and nuzzle his ear, “we’re still together right? So what’s the harm of a little rain?”

It all starts when Nilou asks for your help while preparing for a special theatre performance. The actors would all improvise the story based on a prompt that was given before. As Nilou already knew the prompt, she decides to prepare for a play centered around the idea of lovers celebrating their anniversary together. But given that she doesn’t have much experience with love, the two of you decide to go around and ask your acquaintances what their ideal date might look like.

As luck has it, you happen to run into the Wanderer at the Grand Bazaar. So what harm could there be in asking him for his thoughts on the matter as well, right? Although, a part of you decided to do this because of your growing feelings for him.

You quickly explain the situation with the play to him. “If you must know, I don’t care for the idea of a romantic affair. Lovey-dovey stuff and flirting is just a pointless waste of time and makes my skin crawl”, he scoffs, “besides, the notion of two people being bound to each other for eternity simply because of their feelings for one another is ridiculous. Even those endeavors end one day and even someone who claims to love you might leave if offered the right price. They tell you that you mean something to them and then one day you never see them again. There’s no use in pursuing love.” You let out a sigh, not sure what you were expecting for an answer instead of this.

“Okay, great, now can we put your attitude aside for a moment?”, you roll your eyes, “just imagine you had someone you were in love with. What activities would be fun for you to do with them?” He sighs but muses that Nahida would probably scold him if she found out he didn’t help you with something as simple as an answer to a question. “Hmph. Fine. If I was to go on a ‘date’, I’d like to cook with them. The act of cooking together to produce the perfect meal feels much more intimate than any shallow flirting”, he answers.

“Oh that’s a nice idea!”, you respond before impulse gets the better of you, “we should cook together sometime-”

“Did you just ask me out on a date?”, he raises an eyebrow but blushes furiously. “Well, that depends on your answer, doesn’t it?”, you wink.

“I- I’m not necessarily against it”, he admits and crosses his arms in front of his chest, “ that is, if you can even cook properly.” He huffs and you let out a laugh. “Oh, whatever happened to ‘this is just a pointless waste of time and makes my skin crawl’, huh?”, you dramatically sigh, “if I recall correctly from what Yae Miko told me, in your homeland of Inazuma they refer to this as being a tsundere.” “I’m not-”, his blush darkens, “you should keep your mouth shut before I change my mind.”

Whatever happened to ‘love makes my skin crawl indeed, you think to yourself and smile as you watch the Wanderer carefully handle the ingredients for the meal you’re going to make. He explains every step of the recipe to you and you follow his instructions carefully.

When you accidentally cut your finger while cutting vegetables, Wanderer is at your side with disinfectant and bandaids in an instant. “What the hell are you doing? Are you incapable of cutting a couple of ingredients? You’re supposed to focus on the knive, why were you staring at my face instead?”, he fusses over you, pretending it was because he was annoyed with you. “Well…you’re pretty”, you quietly respond and he shakes his head and lets out a sigh. “You’re too much…” “Aw, you’re worried! If it calms you, you could kiss it better!”, you suggest, winking at him again. “Who do you think you’re talking to-?”, the blush is back on his face and he refuses to look you in the eyes.

“If you tell anyone about this, I’ll never trust you with anything again”, he mumbles a couple hours later after the two of you had finished your meal and he was sitting on your couch with you, snuggled close to you. “Oh, don’t worry, they’re going to know about it soon enough when some random stranger decides to flirt with me and you get jealous”, you tease. “You talk too much”, he scoffs and his lips meet yours in another gentle kiss. He didn’t tell you how he felt just yet, but his actions speak louder than words.

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faebaex · 1 year

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Tangled in Wonderland - Fighting Fire with Fire

author note: aaaaa this is so late! Sorry, sorry – graduation happened and then I was very busy with misc things x-x but this instalment is a little longer to make up for it! Hope you enjoy, Scarabia is up next!

characters: Azul Ashengrotto x GN!Reader

You had only given yourself two objectives when you had realised that you had been transported to the world of Twisted Wonderland.

One: figure out a way to get back to your own world, preferably in one piece.

Two: keep a low profile and avoid the game’s named characters as much as possible.

Unfortunately, none of those objectives had been going well.

Despite your best attempts, you had already run into the game’s first two housewardens. Chapter one of the game had pretty much run on schedule, culminating in Riddle’s eventual overblot. You ran into Leona by fluke, and whilst the encounter was not as terrible as you thought it would be, you still found it less than ideal for your plan to keep a low profile, especially now that Leona would give you the odd nod here and there if you passed each other in the hallway. That caused you to get a few more stares than usual. There was also another curious issue that had caught your attention.

Even with you laying low and keeping yourself out of the main story as much as possible, Leona’s overblot still happened. You had noticed that Crowley had not asked/threatened you into investigating the odd accidents that had been going on around campus in the run up to the spelldrive tournament, which you assumed was because he was still avoiding you so you didn’t hound him about getting home. So even though it wasn’t you who helped uncover the truth about the incidents, the truth still came out and you, through fates untimely intervention, ended up on the Savanaclaw spelldrive field to witness his overblot.

Regarding your attempts to figure out a way home, research had been slow. Whilst Riddle was a great help, he could also be a hindrance. With midterms on the horizon, Riddle had been visiting not to assist you with your research, but to make sure you had been studying properly for the upcoming exams. Because he considered you an honorary member of Heartslabyul, Riddle deemed it his role to make sure you succeeded in your academic endeavours, even going through the effort of making you a study schedule and notes in order for you to maximise your study time efficiently. Although you appreciated the gesture, getting more sidetracked was not what you needed right now. But you figured there were worst things that could happen.

But as usual, fate decided to show you that there were definitely worse things.

You had just gotten to the library, tote bag full of study materials that Riddle had generously lent to you swinging behind you as you weaved through the bookshelves and desks, aiming for your usual table at the back. You figured you could continue your own research and if Riddle showed up, you could just swap the books over and he would be none the wiser.

Of course, you had no idea that a whole bigger problem than Riddle Rosehearts was awaiting you. Because when you rounded the corner that enclosed your library table, the devil himself was waiting for you.

Or in this case, Azul Ashengrotto.

“Ah! There you are prefect!” Azul exclaimed, slamming one of your research books shut which he had clearly been nosing through, “I have been waiting for you. I trust your classes went well today?” He smiled at you, that usual picture perfect, business smile affixed to his face. All you could do was stare blankly at him, willing every muscle in your face not to react so that you didn’t give him an opening.

Why were you running into Azul?! Chapter three started after midterms! You still had some time before then, brain already working overtime in an attempt to figure out what was the best way to lay low against a whole dorm that excelled in subterfuge and deceit. You were shaken from your thoughts by the sounds of chair legs scrapping against the floor, as Azul got to his feet.

“Say, prefect… Midterms are coming up and it seems to me that you have all the wrong content here,” Azul started as he gestured to the table with all your research materials gathered, “why don’t we take a walk and we can discuss exactly what I can do to help you…”

Oh no. No, no, no.

Without a word, you span on your heel and started to march out of the library, not looking back or faltering in your step. It seemed like you’d actually be studying for your midterms back at Ramshackle today. Riddle would be thrilled.

“My, prefect where are you going?” Azul called after you, and you didn’t have to imagine the predatory smile on his face now that your back was turned, “I only want to talk!”

The library door slammed behind you and you hightailed it back to Ramshackle dorm.

After classes ended the next day, you took the risky decision to return to the library. But this time, you had a plan. Having called in a small favour from the library ghosts that you have become friendly with, you began your walk over to your usual table. Unfortunately, but as expected, Azul was waiting for you, his perfect business smile fixed on his face.

“Prefect, so good to see you.” Azul said, voice smooth as he leaned against one of the chairs. You had to wonder how long he had been standing there, posed like that, waiting for you to turn the corner. You ignored him as you slipped your tote bag of your shoulder and took your usual seat, pretending like he was not there. There was a beat of silence as you found your bookmark and continued reading your book in the place you had left off on, but of course the silent treatment wouldn’t work on someone as adaptable as Azul.

“Ahem, prefect, if you would…”

“Three.” You said loudly, not looking up as you turned over the page of your book. In your peripheral vision, you watched as Azul freeze.

“… Prefect?” Azul enquired, smile frozen on his face.

“Two.” You continued, eyes glued to the book in front of you. The other books rattled on the table, one even flipping open, the pages flapping dramatically before slamming back shut. Azul lifted a hand to adjust his glasses in his usual move to mask the surprise and unease that threatened to destroy his perfect smile. “Why are you—”

“One.” Finally, you looked up, looking directly into his eyes. You were satisfied to see he looked appropriately unnerved, but the best was still to come.

“BOO!!!”

Azul jumped so hard that his glasses went askew, and you couldn’t help the amused smirk that spread across your face as he flapped to regain his composure. The library ghost that had popped out and spooked Azul cackled mischievously and flew around the table a few times before disappearing, giving you the chance to mask your face back into an indifferent expression when Azul turned his attention back to you, still looking a bit shocked. You only offered a small shrug in consolation.

“Those library ghosts can sure be cheeky sometimes.” You said nonchalantly, flitting your eyes back down to your book without another word. Silence fell again, and you swore you heard a small, disgruntled huff before Azul took his leave.

Today, victory was yours.

You had one full day of peace from Azul before he was back again like nothing had happened. You shouldn’t have been surprised, Azul had a tenacity that sometimes made you wonder why the Dark Mirror had not placed him in Pomefiore. And for whatever reason, he had decided that you were very interesting.

He began popping up everywhere. You kept seeing him in the corridors, flashing you a smile that could be fool anyone as being kind. He’d somehow appear behind you in the lunch queue, even if he wasn’t there a minute before. You even decided to avoid the library for a few days, punishing yourself to study for midterms in the creaky Ramshackle dorm, and even then you saw him on your walk back, conveniently placed near the hall of mirrors or the botanical gardens, giving you a friendly wave when you passed. Well, for what passed as friendly with Azul. It was becoming increasingly clear to you, Azul was not going away.

You wracked your brain as to why Azul had taken such an interest in you. You know that when the main character made a deal with him in book three, he had his sights set on Ramshackle dorm so that he could open a branch café of the Mostro Lounge, and it was obvious that this was his agenda still now. But he had never come after the main character this… fiercely, so why was he pursuing you with such aggression?!

You chalked it up to another one of fate’s cruel pranks.

Determined, you continued to ignore his constant presence. With all the studying for midterms that you had been doing, you were convinced that you might actually get a decent grade this time round. Riddle expressed his pleasure at your diligent studying, having been miffed that he had not seen you at your usual spot in the library but delighted to know that you had finally knuckled down on your preparation for midterms.

But you couldn’t continue studying at Ramshackle forever. With Ramshackle came Grim, and with Grim came Ace and Deuce. And when you threw in the Ramshackle ghosts, you had an environment that definitely wasn’t suitable for studying. So inevitably, you ended up back at the library. Once again, you had one day of peace before Azul’s channels of information got back to him that you were back at the library because the very next day, Azul was waiting for you.

“Ah, prefect!” Azul said cheerfully, going so far as to pull out your chair for you, “I’m glad to run into you again. I must have missed you the last few times I have come to the library, I haven’t seen you here!” Azul’s business smile was out in full force today, and your lips pursed as you took your seat, ignoring Azul as he tried to help your push your chair in, not that it phased him at all. Azul was in top form today.

“Now, I’ve have something that I’d like to discuss with you…” Azul began as he took a seat opposite you, folding his hands in front of him neatly. You ignored him as you reached into your tote bag and opened one of your study books, deciding to brush up on some alchemy terms.

“It has been brought to my attention that…” Azul cleared his throat delicately, and leans forward slightly, lowering his voice, “now, I know that your situation is a little… delicate, but please be assured, I can help.” You continued to ignore him, trying your best to memorise the endless amounts of alchemy components that you had apparently learned this semester. A hand gently placed itself on top of your textbook, and you looked up to see Azul with his perfected faux expression of mixed pity and sympathy, which you were sure had won him over many clients in the past. For you, it just made your stomach turn.

“I know you’re failing. Multiple subjects, in fact.” Azul said quietly, and your eyes narrowed at him. “And who told you that?” You asked bluntly, and Azul pulled his hand back, holding up in the air in a gesture seeking peace, “now, now… You know I have to abide by client confidentiality… But you know how friends talk…” Azul purred, a predatory glint in his eyes as he smiled at you.

Great, so somebody had talked. You wondered who it could be, Ace? Deuce? Grim? Not that it mattered. Now Azul was determined to get his claws sunk into you, and you needed to deter him. Fast.

“While I appreciate your concern, I’m doing just fine. You could say that I’ve got friends in high places where are looking out for me. One even gave me a study schedule. You may know him, he’s at the top of the second-year rankings, after all.” You retorted with a sickly-sweet smile, feeling glad to have gotten that dig in, knowing Riddle and Azul’s competitive history. Azul’s smile never faltered, though his eyes did harden slightly.

“Ah, but you have so many subjects to learn in such a short amount of time. Midterms are next week.” Azul pointed out, a hand moving to rest on his chest with a flourish, “with a copy of my notes for each subject, you are guaranteed to improve your grades, enough that the professors will not give you a hard time over it. I know I could never understand, but it must be so difficult being the school’s only magicless student. You poor, unfortunate soul. I would rest so much easier at night knowing that you weren’t struggling unnecessarily.”

Your eye twitched at that, the urge to throw one of the heavy, leather-bound tomes at your side directly at Azul’s head growing thick and fast. “I said I wasn’t interested.” You responded firmly through gritted teeth. You had hoped the sly mention of Riddle would get Azul off your back, but clearly you were being naïve. Your eyes fell back down to your textbook as silence fell between you again, hoping through some fluke that ignoring Azul would make him leave you alone, but of course it wouldn’t.

“Well, if you don’t want to make a deal based on a grades perspective…” Azul mused allowed, his smile turning a tad more sinister, “how about this? Think of all the time you’ll have free to spend working on your interesting little side project if you don’t have to worry about your grades?” Azul’s fingers stroked along the spine of one of your many research books and you froze.

Now, you knew that one of your main goals was to keep a low profile in Twisted Wonderland until you figured out a way home. And if you deluded yourself hard enough, you could believe that to some extent, you had. But whilst you could tolerate Azul’s stalking, his faux friendly behaviour in the corridors and in the lunch line, and his many attempts to solicit you in the library and rope you into a predatory deal that you had no hopes of ever completing, there was one thing that you would never let slide.

And that was someone attempting to foil your plans to get back home.

Your eyes hardened as you gazed over at Azul. You needed to get rid of him, to deter him so strongly that he’d be hesitant to ever approach you again so lightly. And you knew just the way to do it.

You didn’t want to do it to him, but in your defence, he had started it. And in the types of games that he liked to play, you had to fight fire with fire.

Your pursed lips melted into a smile as you leaned forward. “Why don’t you make a deal with me instead, Azul?” You offered, crooking your finger in a motion to call him closer to you. Whilst he seemed hesitant, he was clearly intrigued by your suggestion and leaned closed to you as you looked him dead in the eye, speaking in a hush tone.

“You’re going to leave me alone. Because if you don’t, I’m going to tell every single person I walk past that they should take some time to visit the Atlantica Memorial Museum in the Coral Sea. I’ll tell them ‘hey! I know there is a really cool statue that catches your eye as soon as you enter, but you should really take a moment to check out the photographs right by the door. There are some very cute pictures there, especially one with the prince of the Coral Sea!’ You never know what you might find, right Azul?” You watched the colour drain from Azul’s face with every word you spoke, barely able to mask his horror at what you were telling him.

“H-how… Who…” He was flustered now, recoiling away from you like you had slapped him before leaning back closer to hiss at you, “how do you know about that?!” Azul was incredulous, so shocked at the dirt you had on him that he couldn’t even begin to deny it. He had to— no, he needed to know how you knew, like his very life depended on it.

“You’d be surprised what I know about you, Azul.” You responded cooly, leaning back in your chair and levelling him with a severe stare. “Things you’ve worked so hard to keep secret. I’m happy to keep them secret for you too, but you see, the thing is…” Your eyes narrowed at him now, and if he could have gotten paler, he would have, “when I get irritated, say by being constantly bothered by someone who can’t take ‘no’ for an answer…” You started to raise your voice with every word, “I get louder, and louder and…”

“Okay, okay!” Azul recoiled from you with an audible thump against his chair. He looked frazzled; pale faced with sweat beading on his forehead, “l-let’s not be rash, prefect. I see now that…” Azul cleared his throat, desperate to claw back some of his composure as he quickly stood from his chair, not even bothering to tuck it back in, “I see now that I’ve disturbed you during an incredibly important time. I apologise. I’ll take my leave, and I hope you can use your… Discretion not to act impulsively on this… Sensitive matter?”

You flashed Azul a serene smile that was not at all genuine, and he knew it. “I’ll try my best. There’s only so much I’m capable of. You know, being a magicless student and all.” You uttered with sweetness, and you thought you heard a low whine from Azul before he quickly made his escape, hurrying out the library with his dignity in tatters.

You smiled to yourself as you slowly pushed your study textbook aside. You knew it was a very risky move to threaten Azul like that, and there was a good chance that you might find yourself tied up and thrown in the sea by the end of the semester for so boldly confronting him. This wasn’t the last you would see of him, Azul too calculating to let you, a loose end that he never dreamed of encountering, go free. But for now, you could relish in the small, peaceful reprieve you had given yourself as you pulled one of your research books in front of you, finally continuing where you had left off.

#twst #twisted wonderland #twst x reader #twisted wonderland x reader #azul ashengrotto #twst azul #azul ashengrotto x reader #azul ashengrotto x y/n

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subastian-swallows · 1 year

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FLUFF ALPHABET — HLC

Ominis Gaunt ૮꒰ ˶• ༝ •˶꒱ა ♡

Category: Fluffy Fluff ૮꒰ ˶• ༝ •˶꒱ა ♡

A = Admiration (what do they absolutely adore about you?)

Ominis adores the way you see the world, and not in a ‘well I can’t see so you tell me,’ kind of way. But in a way that he could listen to you for hours, simply explaining what flower you saw on your walk today or about the bee that attacked Sebastian in Herbology. He adores the way you experience the world around you and he feels almost connected with you — because of it. He’s never cared for seeing things, he got used to it and had years to practise. But listening to you talk about everything that makes you happy, makes him happy and what makes you sad, makes him sad. He could say he adores the way you laugh, when you’re really happy or how your voice quivers slightly when you’re sad, but that would be too easy an answer. Instead, he adores the little things — things people might not notice, but he does. Like how your voice elevates when you’re excited or when your answers grow short when you’re grumpy. He adores it all.

B = Body (what is their favourite part of your body?)

Ominis is a lot more subtle about this, abruptness being Sebastian’s thing. And the thing about his favourite parts of you, is well everything. Of course, this answer would frustrate you a little — thinking it’s him taking the easy way out of answering, until he pulls you towards him. He would then grumble and slowly map out each part of you, how your nose angles a certain way, or how your eyes crinkle at the sides when your happy, or how your lips curves perfectly no matter if your happy or sad. He would explain in soft detail, that he might not be able to see you, but he can feel you and it helps the image of you in his head. So that is why his favourite parts of you is everything — he has created the perfect imagine of the perfect person for himself and that is you.

C = Cuddling (how do they like to cuddle?)

Ominis cuddles depend on his mood much like Sebastian. But unlike Sebastian who I believe prefers touching in a different way, like holding your hand — Ominis needs almost full body contact. For example: resting his head in your lap, hands playing with your fingers, while you speak about your day. Or holding you from behind as you sit in his lap, studying. Or the full body embraces you provide him when he has a nightmare, the pressure of you being the perfect thing to bring him back to the ground. Ominis is subtle about PDA in front of others, partly unsure of himself and constantly feeling like you could do better, but that doesn’t stop him from cuddling you quickly and acting like he’s reaching for a book in the Library or a vial in Potions.

D = Dates (what does their ideal date with you look like?)

Ominis’ ideal date is being with you. And yes, that might sound lame or an easy answer — but to Ominis, he doesn’t see it that way. Truthfully, he just wants to do anything that makes you happy, anything that allows him the chance to hear the change in your voice when you’re excited or the noises you make when you’re surprised. He just likes knowing you’re happy and if that means he’s begrudgingly following you into a cave, gripping your hand tightly and wishing he had more of a backbone with you, then so be it. More often than not, Ominis prefers to visit Hogsmeade with you or the lake, just enjoying each other’s company while you explain what you can see. He loves listening to you talk and just sitting in the common room together — is more than enough.

E = Emotions (how do they express emotion around you?)

Ominis is more subtle. I feel like subtly is something he has become accustomed to, growing up the way he did — showing weakness was treated like the worst thing imaginable and so he got really good at hiding it. He doesn’t mean to be like this, more often than not, feeling a little guilty about holding so much in — but with you, he slowly opens up more. You bring out the part of him that he thought he had lost and he knows he could never repay you for that. When Ominis is angry, it’s perhaps the only time you know for certain — he’s a hot head in the complete 180 to Sebastian and he grows quiet. He doesn’t necessarily want to take it out on you, so he hides until he can speak his mind — it usually being about you putting yourself in harms way etc. He doesn’t like being angry at you and it doesn’t happen often — but you know when giving him space is needed.

F = Family (do they want one? If they do, when?)

Now this is a hard one. For I believe that Ominis wouldn’t want to continue his family’s bloodline. I think he would have drilled it into his head, that he didn’t deserve the happiness of a family, feeling sick at the idea of his bloodline expanding. But you would change that eventually, perhaps even by accident. Truthfully, he just doesn't like the idea, but I think deep down — raising a child with you, would bring him more joy than he could even admit. If it happened by accident, I think he would find it nerve-racking at first, scared that he wouldn't do a good job — considering how he was raised. But you would easily win him over and when the time came to it, he realises he was simply being foolish — and he ends up being a great father and even better husband.

G = Gifts (how do they feel about gift giving? What are their habits when it comes to this?)

Ominis loves gifting you things. It's another subtle way of him to express his love to you — without having to say it out loud, which he finds hard sometimes. His gifts at first were a little lavish and you eventually had to tell him that you don't need such things, but Ominis usually doesn't listen — and buys them anyway. The more subtle things would be flowers or chocolate and they would be hand delivered in secret or on passing — you would be busily focused on something in the courtyard, maybe with your friends. He would appear out of the blue, kissing you on the head, before handing it to you and disappearing again — not needing a thank you.

H = Holding Hands (when/how do they like to hold hands?)

Hand holding is something really intimate to Ominis — he loves it, loves the feeling of your hand in his and he especially loves tracing the lines and curves of your fingers and palm. He often doesn't mind if others notice, but more often than not, Ominis doesn't like showing other's that side of him. Like I said, he's not big on PDA, but that doesn't stop him from holding your hand — subtly holding them beneath the table in the great hall or beneath your robes as you sit close together on the benches watching the latest Quidditch match.

I = Injury (how would they act if you got hurt?)

Ominis would be livid. He would also be completely panicked and overwhelmed — worried over if you were seriously injured. Truthfully, Ominis would be the first at your side and the last at your side — constantly asking you if you need anything or what he could do to make things easier. If the injury was due to someone else, well they better watch out — Ominis holds a grudge like no other and he would make sure they are punished rightfully so. In the end he would dote on you hard, fluffing your pillows, helping you eat — despite you saying you can do it. He would just be super sweet.

J = Jokes (do they like to joke around with or prank you? how?)

Ominis joking around is hard to come by — but not impossible. He usually needs help, possibly coming to you in a weird mood and being like 'lets mess with Sebastian today?' This would be just little things like misplacing his belongings, ignoring him. Ominis doesn't tend to be one who plays pranks, but will join in on occasion. He does love teasing you though and tickles, Ominis is very ticklish.

K = Kisses (how do they like to kiss you?)

Ominis' kisses are soft, passionate, loving and memorable. Depending on the situation, Ominis kisses you as if he's going to lose you — as if you will realise you deserve better. When his kisses are soft, he kisses you delicately — his lips lingering in each spot he places them and he always ends them with a small smile. When his kisses are passionate, he kisses you with desire and longing — as if he is under a spell and his hands twist wildly in your clothes, pulling you close, desperate for your touch. When his kisses are loving and memorable, he kisses with devotion — with the idea that he wants to remember you completely. He normally traces your face with his fingers, but more often than not, he prefers doing it with his lips, his tongue. He wants to create your picture in his mind and lock it away forever, never wishing to forget it.

L = Love (how do they show you they love you?)

Ominis, like Sebastian is three of the five, love languages. Words of affirmation, Quality time and Physical touch. He loves telling you his feelings, especially when you both can slip away from the world. He needs you to hear it often, something he wasn't accustom to growing up and so he goes, almost over the top to make sure you know his feelings — this is only when you both finally told each other. Before that Ominis typically bottles everything up. Quality time and Physical touch is just as important to Ominis — being near you, touching you, even if it's just your hand, makes him incredibly happy and it's how he shows you in public that he loves you. You're the first person he wants to talk to and the last, he needs you with him at all times — and you willingly agree to it.

M = Memory (favourite memory together?)

First time you bring him to the Room of Requirement. It's the middle of sixth-year and your Hippogriffs have had their babies and all you want to do is share it with him. Ominis has always been curious — but also incredibly nervous. It's the first time you touch hands, in more of intimate way, than just normal. You support him and he trusts you, to pat the Hippogriffs — and he can't stop himself from kissing you. It's sudden and a little awkward — his lips missing yours slightly as he moves to fast and you laugh, before supporting him to do it right again.

N = Nightmare (what is their worst fear?)

His family is usually what he has nightmares of. What he was made to do, what he had to go through with etc. You often find him shakily keeping busy in the Undercroft after his nightmares and when you make yourself known — it doesn't take long before he breaks down in your arms. You allow him to cry, for there is nothing wrong with it and you simply just hold him — tightening your grip around him when he needs it. You then talk, about anything really and you keep talking into Ominis feels better. Reminding him constantly that he isn't them and he is a good person.

O = Oddity (what is one quirk they have?)

Ominis hums when he’s focused. At first you thought someone had charmed something in the Library to play music, when it got really quiet. But it was and had always been Ominis, his soft humming a tune — that has become his favourite. He doesn’t notice it either and it’s always when he’s so focused on something else that the only one who does is you or the others around him. You find it incredibly cute, Ominis finds it super embarrassing and yet — can’t help himself most of the time.

P = Pet Names (what do they like to call you?)

Darling

My Love

Angel

Beloved

Beautiful

Mi Amore

Trouble

Q = Quality Time (how do they like to spend time with you?)

Ominis doesn't care how he spends his time with you. It could be studying in the Library, lazing in the sun in one of the courtyards or simply sitting in the common room together. All that matters is that you're both together and aren't interrupted. He enjoys every moment where he gets to spend it with you and when you're apart, he simple whines so much that eventually Sebastian drags him to you and tags you in — you laugh every time.

R = Rhythm (what song reminds you of them?)

Yours - Conan Gray

Die For You - Joji

Until I Found You - Stephen Sanchez

Those Eyes - New West

j's lullaby (darlin' i'd wait for you) - Delaney Bailey

Complex - Katie Gregson-Macleod

I'm In Love With You - The 1975

S = Secrets (how open are they with you?)

Ominis is more secretive, but not because he doesn't trust you. Truthfully, it's because he doesn't want to burden with you with all of the drama he deals with behind closed doors. The constant pressure from his family, often gets too much and when you eventually find him and question him about it — he tries to wave it away. You, however are stubborn and when you sit him down and get it out of him, Ominis slowly breaks down his walls and tells you everything.

T = Time (how long did it take you to get together?)

End of the sixth-year. With everything that happened in your fifth-year, anything 'feeling' related was put on hold. Truthfully, from the beginning of the sixth-year, Ominis knew he was in love with you, realising almost quite quickly that he didn't want to be away from you. Then it became awkward for a bit — perhaps, because Ominis thought you wouldn't feel the same, Sebastian was more your type...right? It's only after you both study together, tucked away in the back of the Library that he thoughts spill out — before he can stop them and he wonders what you think of him. He's shy now, but you smile and lean over and kiss his cheek softly — Ominis blushes hard and all you leave him with is one thing: 'I like you, Ominis, took you long enough to figure it out.' You both start dating in private for a while, before telling anyone.

U = Upset (how do they act when you’re upset?)

Ominis can always tell. For some reason he's tuned into your emotions better than you are — knowing exactly when it changes, even just by a little. Perhaps, it's with how much time you spend together, but when you're upset, before you even need to say anything — Ominis whisks you away from everyone and nestles you in an embrace. He holds you for a while, until you either laugh or cry — depending on why you're upset and when you eventually tell him what's happened, he always knows how to make you happy.

V = Vaunt (what are they proud of? Do they like to show you off?)

Ominis is proud of you. How could he not be? He's never met a more interesting, stubborn, intelligent, beautiful person — and everything you do either amazes him or stresses him out. Either way, he's always discussing your talents and everything you've accomplished — truthfully, he just loves you. He doesn't need to show you off and well, to be honest — he doesn't want to. You see if he did, then you'd have more interest your way and well, Ominis doesn't want to share your attention.

W = Warrior (how do they feel about you fighting? Would they fight for you, beside you, etc?)

He doesn't hate you fighting, but he doesn't like it. Truthfully, he just wants you to be safe and he already stresses out enough with you and Sebastian's friendship — that listening to you talk about Ashwinders and poachers, gives him a headache. Ominis would fight beside you, for you and with you — if you asked. He hates people considering him to be less than, because he's blind — but don't be mistaken, having Ominis with you, is a great asset and you love it. Especially when he gets all hot and sweaty.

X = X-Ray (how well are they able to read you?)

Ominis can read you better than you can read yourself. He's so tuned into you, that it's almost scary that he just knows what's going on with you and if you're happy or sad. Truthfully you love it, for the most part — considering it means you never have to say much, which helps when you're sad. But, it can be a little frustrating when you're mad at him and he won't give you space, when you need it.

Y = Yes (how would they propose to you?)

Ominis would be reluctant, perhaps the idea had come up — but considering how he feels about his family, he would be worried about you. When he eventually gets over this and stops being a coward, his words, Ominis would propose to you in a romantic way. Consider, receiving a letter to ask you to meet in a spot you both had your first kiss and he would propose, with his whole heart, explaining in every little detail that he will take care of you for the rest of your life and he can't see himself with anyone else. He would remember from past conversations your favourite gemstone and would get a ring made with it — one of a kind, just like you.

Z = Zen (what makes them feel calm?)

You.

HOPE YOU ENJOY MY LOVES! ପ(๑•ᴗ•๑)ଓ

Tagging: @spaceyaceface <3 enjoy hehe

#hogwarts legacy #ominis gaunt #hogwarts #ominis x you #ominis x reader #ominis gaunt x y/n #ominis imagine #ominis x y/n #hogwarts legacy ominis #ominis x mc #ominis gaunt fic #ominis gaunt imagine #ominis gaunt x you #ominis gaunt x reader #ominis gaunt x mc

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lavendertales · 1 year

Text

SEÑORITA: Chapter 7**

pairing: Javier Peña x Murphy!f!reader

summary: following your fallout with Steve, you find yourself on Javier's doorstep.

word count: 6.4k (oops)

series warnings: reluctant friends to lovers, lots of playful banter, mutual pining, slow burn, secret relationship, filthy smut.

chapter warnings: face sitting, body worship, piv (safe).

A/N: here we are ya'll, the long awaited explosion of the slow burn hehehe. thank you so much for all the comments and the love, it means so much to me 💕I hope you'll enjoy this chapter as well, and feedback is always much appreciated!

AGELESS/EMPTY BLOGS & MINORS WILL BE BLOCKED!

series masterlist | AO3

You would’ve preferred to sit down inside your apartment in order to have this conversation rather than wander aimlessly on the hot streets of New York at almost midnight with your brother, but the surroundings are less important than the issue at hand.

Steve offered to buy frozen yogurt for the two of you, and fight as you might, you were persuaded to eat a little bowl of strawberry cold goodness. The two of you sat down at this little place on the corner, both clearly too uptight to initiate the conversation. So you clear your throat, exhaling slowly and steadily, and braced yourself.

“Steven—“

“I’m sorry.”

He blurts out the words as he stares at you, his eyes big and regretful.

“I’m so sorry for not supporting you more,” he continues, putting down the spoon. “And for not taking more of an interest in your hobby. It clearly means so much to you and I… I know I was a dickhead.”

“If you’re waiting for me to disagree it’s not going to happen.”

Steve chuckles, huffing.

“It’s more than a hobby, Steve,” you tell him. “In an ideal world where money wouldn’t be a thing, this would be my dream job. I’d do nothing else but write, travel and eat food all over the world. It’s why I took a job at the library. It’s the closest I’ll ever be to achieving that dream.”

“That makes me sad.”

“Made me sad too. But this is reality, and denying it won’t do me any favors.”

“You were always so much more mature and rational than me.”

Surprised, you make a face at him, unable to contain yourself. You’ve never heard such words from your brother.

“Me?” you say with a light chuckle escaping from your lips. “The eternal dreamer?”

“Yeah. Sure, you like to picture fictional worlds and get lost in them but you never lose sense of reality. You’re neither optimistic nor pessimistic. You just… live in the now.”

“You know… I’m actually really close to getting my own book published.”

Steve’s eyes widen further, his face revealing nothing but sheer excitement at this point, and the sight softens you; so much so that you smile involuntarily, rather flustered to finally share this news with him.

“That’s amazing, I’m so happy for you!” he nearly shouts.

“Thanks, thanks. You’re the third person I tell this to.”

“Third?”

“Javier and Sylvie know.”

“Oh. I see. Is it based on Star Wars? Or inspired by it?”

You frown. “No, you doofus, it’s my own story. If I were to publish a fanfiction for Star Wars, I’d definitely get sued by George Lucas.”

“Kind of defeats the point of writing it, doesn’t it?”

As happy as you felt a minute ago, you feel just as dumbfounded now.

“The point, again, is creativity,” you reply. “You start from there and you build towards your own independent stories.”

“Isn’t it a waste of time? I mean why not start right at—“

“Oh my God! You’ve been this way since we were kids. You always thought you’re superior, whether you realized it or not.”

“I didn’t. And I didn’t mean to insult—“

“You never mean to and yet you still do.”

Steve watches you stand up, hands on your hips and munching on your lower lip in what can only be described as anger finally bubbling up at the surface.

“Mom and dad always sung your praises because you chose to do things logically and fit into society while I was a bitter disappointment for spending time alone in my room, reading and writing,” you say. “You finished high school and went straight to the Academy and mom and dad couldn’t have been prouder. Me? I finished high school and went to study literature in college and it still wasn’t good enough.”

“Nobody ever said that, you know it’s not true.”

“They didn’t have to say it. I could see it in their eyes, the way they spoke. I was the weirdo who needed a social life while you were their beloved Steven, making his way into the real world at such a young age, being so brave. Mom and dad never stopped thinking there’s something wrong with me and they didn’t hesitate in telling me that with every chance they got. Passive aggressively but still.”

“There’s nothing wrong with you.”

“I know. I know that now. It took years of therapy to realize that.”

Steve watches you closely, filled with unrelenting guilt. He’s never seen you this decisive and mad, but he knows deep down he’s had it coming. All of the things he wished for your relationship are slowly going down the drain and he begins to fear that if he doesn’t say the right thing now and try his hardest to be here for you, he will lose you forever.

“I never meant to treat you any way other than with respect,” he says, his voice oddly hoarse. “I know I’m pushing things a lot of the time and I exaggerate and I have no right to intervene in your personal life, but it only comes from a place of needing to protect you.”

“I can protect myself, Steven.”

He huffs, grabbing your wrist and thus urging you to sit back down. “Do you remember in seventh grade when that group of idiots picked on you while you were reading on the playground? It rained heavily the day before and they snatched the book from your hands and threw it into a puddle, ruining it.”

“Yeah, I—I remember.”

“And then you told me that one of them, the bigger one, came onto you that same afternoon and forcefully kissed you. I had him suspended.”

“What—how?”

“I may have… broke his nose and threatened him to worse if he didn’t go to the principal’s office to confess to both forcing himself onto you and to bullying you.”

“Oh my—you never told me that.”

Steve shrugs. “Pretty sure that was the moment I started to be mindful of the guys that were around you. And when you got annoyed and purposely started dating the worst guys you could find, things have gotten wild.”

“You can say that again.”

You both chuckle.

“You know, the fact that you confided in Javi about your book before me or Connie is a bit hurtful,” Steve admits.

“Do you know why I told Javier first? Even before Sylvie? Because he asked me. It’s that simple. He took an interest in my passion and he actually cared about it. Hell, he turned my Star Wars story into a real book. He made it into a book just for me because he knows how much it means to me, and how much writing means to me.”

“He what?”

You nod. “Yeah. He didn’t mock me, he didn’t assume he knows better than me. He even encouraged me to keep going, which is how I’m close to finishing the editing part of my book faster than I anticipated. And this from a guy who was a complete stranger to me three months ago. You keep saying that Javier is your best friend but you don’t seem to treat him that way. You treat him like he’s bad news, like you didn’t go through all that shit together in Colombia. You need to get your shit together. Javier is a really good man. A good friend, and an overall good person.”

“I know he is, I’m just worried about him too like I’m worried about you. He hasn’t been the same since we came back from Colombia. It changed him in ways that I… I don’t know. I have Connie and Olivia and I feel so lucky but… he keeps to himself. He barely allows anyone in so I don’t know what it’s like inside his head. I was just so worried that you’d both rush into something you might not be ready for and end up hurting each other.”

You don’t realize you’ve been holding your breath for quite some time, but you certainly hadn’t felt the need to breathe, not in this moment when years of anger and misunderstandings culminate in the most honest sentences either of you have ever spoken to each other.

“Even if we did rush into a relationship or casual dating or whatever, it still wouldn’t be your call to make,” you remind him. “It’s not your decision, it’s mine and his. We’re both adults, tip-toeing around each other and around you because you have this weird protection fetish.”

“It’s not—“

“You know what I meant.”

“I—I’m really sorry, sis. I just wanted us to be closer. I went the wrong way about it, I know that.”

“You did. Trying to intimidate your best friend and controlling whoever your baby sister is around is not the way to go about this. You pulled the same shit in high school and look how that turned out.”

“I was worried about you, about both of you.”

“And you had reasons to, I’ll give you that. But now there is none. I’m okay. And Javier can talk if he feels like it.”

“You don’t know him the way I do.”

“Maybe not. But you don’t know him like I do, either.”

Steve calls out your name once you get ready to leave.

“Whom I date is none of your business,” you retort. “Not even if that someone was your best friend. Which is not. So cut it out already and get your shit together. If you can’t accept this, then leave me the hell alone.”

“I’m sorry.”

“I appreciate it. And I appreciate what you did for me that time in the seventh grade. I really do. But I need some time before I can truly forgive you.”

Javier hadn’t expected the erratic knock on the door at this hour, and he certainly hadn’t expected to be met with the sight in his doorway.

You look just as lovely as ever, though you do seem to be a little tense. He doesn’t ask; instead, he looks you over and welcomes you inside, waiting for you to offer some explanation for your late visit, already perilous enough as it is.

“I know it’s late, I’m sorry,” you coo. “I just—this was the first place I thought of. Didn’t wanna be alone in my apartment.”

“It’s okay. What happened?”

“Why do you assume something happened? Can’t a friend pay a visit to another friend?”

“They can, but not with that expression on their face.”

“What expression?”

“You look like you’ve been run over.”

You frown, distancing yourself from him even further.

“I’m your friend, I should be able to tell you this without a problem,” Javier adds.

“No, you sure can. Thank you for the fine observation.”

“Glad I could be of service. Do you want a drink?”

Say no, your mind screams at you, almost begs. You shouldn’t be drinking, not when you’re feeling vulnerable after the raw conversation you’ve had at long last with your brother, and certainly not around Javier.

It’s not that you don’t trust yourself. You know what you can and can’t handle.

You’re simply afraid the liquor might provide you with the courage to finally tell him exactly what’s on your mind, and that you might end up being rejected. Something tells you Javier might choose loyalty and rationality over his feelings.

He keeps to himself, Steve told you.

“Little bit of whiskey would be nice if you have it,” you eventually reply, catching both Javier and yourself off guard.

“Didn’t know you drink whiskey.”

“I don’t. Not really. Only when I need something really strong.”

“I take it the conversation with Steve didn’t go that well then.”

Fucking hell, how does he do this? How does he intuit things about you without you even saying or hinting them?

“It did. I think,” you smile as a glass of amber liquid is being handed to you. “We talked things through, I told him my piece… he apologized. And he meant it, I could tell.”

“He’s an honest guy, and he means well.”

“I know he does. He only ever wanted to be there for his baby sister and to be a good friend, but he’s taken things too far. Which he’s acknowledged.”

“Color me intrigued and shocked.”

You smile, hiding the gesture in the glass and stealing a glance at Javier. An unfamiliar warmth surrounds you, wraps you in a blanket of confusion and longing that you’re certain you haven’t felt up until now.

“So how come you ended up here then?”

“I don’t know. I just… stormed off, told him I appreciate his apology but I need some time before I can fully forgive him.”

“While we’re at it…” Javier clears his throat, lowering his now empty glass, “I’m sorry too.”

“For what?”

“For everything.”

“You didn’t cause this.”

“I feel like I kind of did mess things up though. I’m quite good at it.”

“Javier…”

“What?”

You lower your glass too, reaching out to take his hand which he hesitantly accepts. “You’re not a bad guy. In no way, shape or form. Trust me on this. I know them pretty well. And you don’t fit in that category.”

When you smile at him, so sincere and bright, Javier pulls back his hand, chugging the rest of whiskey and focusing solely on the way it burns his throat.

And yet when he thinks of the way his body feels when you’re around you, that all-too-familiar burn is nothing compared to it.

“If I wouldn’t have taken this job, maybe things wouldn’t have been this way between you and Steve,” Javier mutters.

“Things between me and Steve have been rocky for years. They would’ve probably continued to be tense if you hadn’t pushed us to talk. Involuntarily, of course. And besides, if you wouldn’t have taken the job… I wouldn’t have met you.”

“I don’t know anyone whose life was better for having known me.”

“There is someone I can think of.”

Javier briefly gazes at you and quickly wishes he’d evaporate. It feels too much, far too consuming to even maintain eye contact with you on account of all the fear, the impossible yearning, the confusion and the—

No. stop it. This is not that.

“Anyway,” you resume, feeling a bit short of breath yourself, “I don’t think Steve wanted me to meet you in the first place.”

“That kinda makes me wanna get back at him.”

“Me too. And you know what would show him?”

Javier raises his brow, already anticipating and dreading the answer before it ever leaves your mouth.

“If we hooked up,” you smile wickedly.

He cocks an eyebrow, his interest peaked and his stomach all twisted in knots. “That so?”

“Mhm. We could let him stew in doubt, let him guess.”

“How would we pull that off?”

“Well, since we already agreed actually doing it is out of the question, a light touch on the arm when we’re all together, gazing at each other from afar, smiling… a kiss on the cheek, stuff like that.”

Javier has no idea when he finds himself in your close proximity again. All he knows is that he’s sitting on the chair next to you, leaning in yet again, cursing his own inner demons for fighting a losing battle, and his breaths betraying his restlessness.

“The buildup to a kiss is the best part,” he coos, and you swear you shiver for a second. “One of them, anyway.”

“Is it though?”

“Yes. What kind of jackasses did you date in the past? Jesus Christ.”

“The worst I could find.”

Against his better judgment—if there was any of it left—Javier chuckles, forcing himself to look at you.

“The moment you look into each other’s eyes and lean in, that’s where it all starts. It’s simple but it’s really powerful stuff. Heart beats faster. Breaths get shallower. At some point your eyes sort of drift away to the other’s lips, wondering what they taste and feel like. And then, when you finally feel bold enough to lean in more…”

You close your eyes, Javier’s faintly whiskey-infused breath all warm and tingly over your lips, and you wait. What you receive in return is a phone ringing though, so you instantly pull away, opening your eyes again and noticing the same expression on Javier’s face as you assume is on yours: desperation.

“I—“he starts, but you shush him immediately.

“It’s okay.”

We shouldn’t anyway, you think.

“Hello?” Javier practically groans into the telephone. “Hey, Con.”

You turn towards him on instinct, curious about the subject matter between the two, though you shouldn’t be; you know exactly what this is about, and at this late hour nonetheless.

“No,” Javier answers in an unusually dark and steady voice, eyes locked on your figure. “She’s not here.”

You look at him, utterly taken aback, and you gulp.

“Have you at least heard from her?” Connie inquires at the other end, unbeknownst to you. “She had a talk or a fight or something with Steve and now he’s worried. He says he called her apartment, went there and there’s no answer. It’s a whole thing.”

“I haven’t heard from her.”

“Javi…”

“Look, Con, with all due respect and care, she’s a grown woman and Murphy needs to stop babying her. She’s perfectly capable of making her own choices and seems to me that right now she doesn’t want to be found. So whatever you think it is that I’m doing…”

“I’m not thinking anything. Should I?”

“We’re… friends.”

“Have you noticed that whenever you say that, the pause between ‘we’ and ‘friends’ gets bigger?”

Javier frowns and blinks several times in a row, dumbfounded. “What?”

“It started out as ‘oh, we’re friends’ but now it’s more along the lines of ‘oh. We’re… sigh… friends’.”

“I sound nothing like that.”

“Javi. Come on.”

“I told you, Con. She’s not here tonight. Wherever she is, I’m sure she’s fine. She just wants to be left alone for a bit.”

“Well if you hear from her—“

“Yeah. Goodnight, Connie.”

Javier hangs up, frozen in the same spot. He knows that now there is no going back and that he’s in deep shit, but truthfully he only gives a damn about your well-being.

Everything else is tomorrow’s problem.

“You lied,” you coo.

“Fine observation skills.”

“Thank you.”

Javier stares at the ground, processing his own words and thoughts. Ever since he left Colombia, he’s all but tried to always do the right thing, the honorable thing and be a respectable man in today’s society. Not the Javier that worked with one of the most gruesome groups in the world for the greater cause, not Javier that bent the American embassy’s rules to fit into his scenarios, but a new Javier that was good and learned from his mistakes.

And now, every time he looks at you, he feels himself falling deeper into temptation, on the verge of making another mistake. Only this one might not be so easy to fix.

“Don’t thank me,” he mutters, pacing around the living room. “It was stupid and selfish. Obviously Connie knows you’re here and Steve’s gonna know and the whole thing’s gonna blow up in my fucking face.”

You notice him purposely avoiding your eyes and you reckon by the edgy way he’s marching through the living room that there are dozens of things on his mind now, if not more.

“Javier.”

No answer, more pacing.

“Javier, look at me.”

Still no answer, slightly less pacing.

“Why aren’t you looking at me? A minute ago you couldn’t stop looking at me when we were about to—“

“We were about to do nothing.”

“Right. I just—“

Then, Javier turns to you so abruptly it startles you for a second. You watch him walk towards you with a look on his face that you can’t quite put together. But it doesn’t intimidate you, nor does it scare you. On the contrary: it rather makes you want to hold him and be with him.

“What the hell are you doing to me?” he murmurs, his chocolate, soft eyes now glued to yours.

“I’m not—I’m not doing any—“

“No, you’re fucking consuming me. Eating me alive from inside out. And looking at you… whenever I look at you, I feel my promise to Steve break. I feel myself break, I feel… I feel the way I did back in Colombia, all fucked up and twisted and you don’t deserve that.”

“You never talk about it. Colombia.”

Javier purses his lips, holding his breath. “Sometimes it feels like I never left. Like it’s hell all around me. But then I think I can’t possibly be in hell cause you wouldn’t be there otherwise.”

Your heart flutters in your chest, your cheeks scorch with flattery and your body only craves more.

“Instead, you’re… here,” Javier continues, somewhat distraught. “You’re here and you’re… warm and fun and… alive. And your scent… I can’t get it out of my fucking head even if I know I should, I really should. Fucking… lavender, ruining me. And I just… I was hollow back there. I was dark and a jackass and… not as half as honorable as I thought I was, or that I’d be. I did shitty things, bad things. Colombia twisted me in ways I can’t revert. But I want to be better now, I want to be worthy, ironically because of you and for you. So looking at you feels like the most incredible thing in the world and the worst.”

You inch closer, breathless from the words that have been thrown at you, so raw and heartfelt.

“Did you ever kill a child?” you ask, and you can see the surprise on Javier’s face as the question is being processed by him.

“No.”

“A woman?”

“No.”

You nod once, slowly, inching even closer to him. “I thought we’re friends,” you whisper.

“We are, which is why I’m saying this with respect and care. Being your friend is killing me.”

“You said I’m not your type.”

“Apparently I was wrong. So very wrong. Apparently… you’re the very thing that I want. Pathetically desperate and… so fucking needy.”

Your skin is on fire by now, your throat dry and your mouth practically drooling.

“Javi,” you manage to get out.

“No, don’t—don’t do this to me right now.”

“Don’t do what? What are you—“

“Don’t say ‘Javi’, not like that.”

“How should I say it then?”

Javier’s eyes drop to your lips, and all of a sudden he’s unable to look elsewhere, consumed entirely by the unholiest thoughts he’s ever known.

“I got some ideas,” he whispers, his tongue wetting his lips.

“Mind sharing them with me?”

“I can’t.”

“But I want you to do this to me. There, verbal consent.”

Javier cocks his head to the side, thus exposing his neck and you’re feeling more parched than ever.

“The things I could do to you…” he mutters as if strictly to himself. “The things I could show you…”

“So show them to me. Show me… you.”

“Fuck, I want—“

“What do you want, Javi?”

The way you said his name, fully aware of the effect it has on him now and how much it messes with his mind, it makes Javier unable to think straight and certainly unable to resist you. In what can only be described as an act of insanity, Javier’s hand boldly rests on your waist, barely touching, and yet enough for both of you to feel the heat radiating from it.

“I want to do this right,” he says. “You’re not a random hookup. I—I wanna take you out to dinner, get to know you and be with you.”

“Dinner sounds nice.”

“Tomorrow night at seven?”

“Okay.”

In an even more insane act, you decide to move closer to him so that your lips press against his stubbled cheek. The touch is tentative, meant to be appreciative and thankful, but in the end, it only acts as a detonator to an already short enough fuse.

Before your brain properly understands what’s happening, you feel Javier sliding down your body until he kneels before you and wraps his arms around your legs and look up at you.

“Show me how to be good,” Javier mutters, and it shocks you to your core. “Show me how to be good, for you. Please.”

You open your mouth, and yet nothing comes out. Your mind must’ve short-circuited because no words come to mind except Sylvie’s from many weeks ago.

Mark my words, this Javier is gonna be on his knees before you, asking you to teach him how to be good.

Then you’re gonna be in big trouble, missy.

Damn you, Sylvie.

Still tongue-tied, you place your index finger beneath Javier’s chin, thus signaling him to stand back up. He follows obediently, staring at you once more and waiting, his heart in his throat.

Finally, at long fucking last, with chills creeping up your spine, you cup Javier’s cheeks and press your lips against his.

And good lord, is this the softest kiss you’ve ever had in your entire life.

It’s languid, tentative at first, as if you’re both waiting for each other’s reaction to it, but within the following seconds, the kiss turns sloppy and heated, betraying your eagerness.

Javier’s hands wrap around your body expertly, and he hums into your mouth, the sound going straight into your cunt almost soaking you on the spot. This is the part of relationships he’s actually really good at, something he’s very confident in, so he wastes no time in guiding you to his bedroom, leaving a wet trail of kisses down on your neck as he plops you on the bed, him atop of you.

“If you want to stop, you gotta tell me now,” he warns, his voice as dark as his eyes. “I mean, we can stop at any point, but if you don’t—“

“I want this, Javier. I want you. I don’t want to stop.”

Javier groans, his mouth back on yours and seemingly devouring it whilst his hands roam nervously on your body. There’s dampness between your legs, and you have the urge to rub your legs together in an attempt to hide the slickness, but when you feel a calloused hand grabbing the back of your thigh, gently squeezing it, you part your legs as if to make enough room for him. And he does; Javier grinds between your legs, beginning to undress you with so much determination it’s causing your head to spin.

By the time you’re topless and writhing beneath him, you’re begging for him to touch you some more. You’re begging for his hands, his mouth, any part of him that he’s willing to give to you, and Javier obeys without a single objection in mind.

“Lift your hips for me,” he instructs, and you do as he says.

Your pants come off, then Javier’s eyes stop on your underwear, already eating you up with a single look.

“So fuckin’ pretty,” you hear him say, and you shiver.

It’s you who pulls him back in for a kiss, and it feels like the most maddening, enticing and damnable thing in the whole wide world. One of Javier’s hands reaches in between your legs, feeling the dampness soaking your panties, and you gasp. He massages your clit through the fabric, having you moan uncontrollably right in his mouth, more so when you’re completely bare, panties thrown carelessly to the side.

“On my face,” Javier manages to get out during the brief pause which he takes to undress himself.

“What?”

“Sit on my face. Right now. I wanna taste you.”

Your mouth ajar, you stare at him struggling to compose yourself but there is no possible scenario in which you can accomplish that successfully. Instead, your eye roam over his shirtless figure, the sight fueling your needs further.

“Will you let me taste you?”

“I—it’s just I’ve never—done that, really.”

Javier looks dumbfounded at you. “You never sat on a guy’s face?”

“No, some of them barely went down on me, so I—“

“Do you trust me?”

You nod.

“Then take a seat.”

Javier lies down on the bed, quickly disposing of his own pants in the process, and it’s only then that you notice how hard he is. It can’t be comfortable, and yet here he is, choosing to do something that’s aimed for your pleasure. Unless of course this gives him great pleasure as well, which you think it does, and that only makes things tougher.

You climb up his body, quivering when you feel his calloused hands kneading the flesh of your ass and thighs as you do so, and quickly try to figure out the logistics of the act. That is, until Javier loses patience and grabs your thighs, placing them on either sides of his face, and you nearly lose your goddamn mind at his first taste he takes of you.

You’re sitting all the way on his face, his nose nudging your clit and his tongue lapping at your folds, collecting every ounce of arousal he can get. It’s pleasure from an angle you didn’t even dream of, and Javier certainly knows his way around a woman’s body. You react out of impulse and grab a handful of his hair, tugging on it while Javier’s tongue splits you open.

“Oh—f-fuck—“

You’re stuttering, heart pounding in your ears and your whole body afire; so much so that you shake, and not out of pleasure—not yet. But the way Javier yaps at your pussy, you somehow know he’s gonna get you there soon.

Beneath you, Javier listens closely to all the sounds you let out for him; he takes the time to feel every portion of your skin, not just the way his mouth is buried in your pussy, and to say he’s in awe would be a crass understatement. When you start grinding on his mouth, your body’s natural reaction to the way ecstasy builds in your body, Javier can’t help his own body’s reaction to it. You don’t see his hand sneaking behind you to curl around his weeping cock, and even if you did, all you’d want would be to take him in your mouth instead, give him at least half the pleasure and happiness he’d been giving you all this time.

“Javi—“

“Mhmmm—sounds so fucking good when you say it like that.”

“J-Javi, please—“

“Shit I could drink from you—all day long.”

Too impatient, both of Javier’s hands go back to your ass, grabbing it so that you rock faster against his tongue, but you’re already moving out of your own accord in a desperate attempt to capture more of his mouth, to have that feeling that’s only bubbling in your belly explode into a thousand explosive flames.

“Need you to say it,” you hear him beg from between your legs. “Can you say it for me, hm? Ask me.”

“Please, Javi…”

“Say it.”

“Javi, I need—I need you. Need to… feel you.”

Then, it all seizes around you: your mind goes blank, your vision goes dark, nothing but stars all around you and unbearable heat bursting from beneath you and going up till your whole body is enveloped in it. Javier’s hands continue to explore your body, touching and caressing every inch of skin, his eyes never leaving your figure like he’s admiring the most precious work of art there is.

“So beautiful,” you see him murmur as you’re getting off him.

Javier licks his lips teasingly just as you lean down to kiss him again. You doubt you’d ever get enough of his mouth now that you’ve finally tasted it.

“You’re so beautiful,” he says. “And so tasty.”

You smile flustered, still unable to think of anything proper to say. Some words do come to mind, of course; thank you, I appreciate your friendship, I’m in love with you—

Oh no, not that one.

You begin to fear that the way you’re kissing him exposes the reality in your mind, the word you undeniably feel fluttering inside your chest, begging to be released, but you can’t. It’s far too soon and too hasty, so you keep them to yourself. As your bodies get entangled with one another and you find yourself beneath him once again, you abandon those words in a tiny box at the back of your mind, sealed.

You find that once you keep your mouth shut, you can only gaze at Javier, and he at you. There’s nothing else to be said, not when your body’s being molded in such tender ways by Javier’s hands and mouth, praised for simply being here in between the sheets with him.

“Javi?”

“Hm?”

“Can you please fuck me now? I think we’ve both waited enough.”

“Couldn’t agree more.”

Javier reaches over, opening the nightstand and eventually rolling a condom onto his erection, lining up to your entrance. You can’t help but admire Javier, his eyes, his lips, his cheeks, his strong arms, his chest and his belly, the soft, dark curls at the base of his cock, the way his lower lip quivers when he’s overwhelmed.

“You’re so—“you gasp.

And the way he fills you to the brim in one languid, careful thrust is equal parts mesmerizing and enticing.

“So what?” Javier asks.

“So pretty.”

Javier stills for a moment, blinking in confusion. “No one’s said that to me before. I don’t… am I?”

You smile, nodding enthusiastically. “Yes. Very much so.”

Then Javier sinks into you, inch by delicious inch. You feel him pressing down onto you, completely undone and ravished, and keeps muttering into your ear little praises here and there. Your back arched, you take him and his words deep inside you, allowing Javier to consume you as much as he told you that you consume him.

And you have to admit, it is the most maddening sensation in the world.

He starts to move, a new urge overcoming him than when he’d been with women in the past. Being with you feels different because for the first time in so many years, he doesn’t want to rush; in spite of his neediness and almost two years of celibacy, now that he’s here, with you and inside of you, he wants to remain in this moment for as long as possible. He doesn’t have to rush, he realizes. There’s no bombs going off in the distance or shootings—most importantly, Colombia is not out there.

But you are here, soft and warm and kind and beautiful and Javier can barely breathe thinking about how much he adores you.

He wants to say the words, he feels them on the tip of his tongue, but he doesn’t want to scare you away. And he doesn’t want to rush things when this has the potential to be something so great.

His thrusts keep the same pace, though Javier feels like he could easily come at any given moment. Your tight, warm walls around him make him dizzy, utterly lost in that damned lavender scent and in your eyes and your smile. And your lips—oh God, he could kiss you all day and all night long. All the other times he’d abstained from kissing you, how close he was… how could he not have you that way?

“Javi…”

It’s all he hears, his name moaned from your perfect lips. All he knows now is you, the way you arch your back with each thrust of his, the way you gasp when his hand lays on your stomach and his thumb plays with your clit.

“I’ve thought about this, you and me… before,” you smile, cupping his cheeks.

“Yeah?”

“Mhm. I swore I’d never tell you. But now—“

“I thought about it too.”

“You—you did?”

Javier nods, leaning down to peck your lips, the gesture followed by an ecstatic smile.

“I shouldn’t have. I knew it was… it was wrong, it was dirty and cheap… I couldn’t stop. I—I tried, please believe me, I really tried, I—“

“Javi, shhh. I know you did. You were very honorable, and a great friend. Especially now, to me.”

You both smile against each other’s lips, Javier’s hips stuttering after a little while. He feels that familiar burn in his stomach, and that’s the only time he dares speed up, almost manically so. With a few grunts, Javier buries his head in the crook of your neck, cursing once in a while as his orgasm bubbled in his whole body. He needs to feel you pulse around him more than anything.

“I’m—shitshitshit—“

“It’s okay, come for me, Javi.”

“But I—“

“I’m close too.”

“Yeah?”

“S-So close… please…”

You don’t need to beg: you and Javier are right there, both tipping over the edge of sanity and falling right into the pit of passion and ecstasy. Javier grunts the loudest he ever had, spilling himself inside the condom and remaining still above you, the pleasure coursing through his veins overwhelming him completely. He looks down on you and sees your face scrunched up in the most adorable and alluring way and it dawns on him: it’s because of him. You came twice now, once in his mouth and once around his cock, gasping and moaning sweetly because of him. There’s a pride in his chest, pride and flattery, almost to an animalistic, primal degree.

When he pulls out, you feel empty and lonely, though the thought seems ridiculous because he’s right there still, isn’t he? You can’t help it—it’s like you want your bodies to remain united as one for as long as humanly possible.

“Oh, by the way,” Javier says, returning from the bathroom with a towel that he begins to press on your inner thighs and between them, “this is probably obvious, but we’re not telling your brother about this, right?”

You raise your eyebrows, bemused at his genuine question.

“I know we joked about it before, but… still.”

“Unless hell freezes over, no, we are not telling Steven shit.”

previous | next

tags: @pedrostories @psychedelic-ink @milkymoon2483 @ifall4dilfs @casa-boiardi @fallenkitten @jenispunk

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akutasoda · 11 months

Note

HIII im so sorry i keep requesting for Dottore/Zandik but can i get a fluffy romantic oneshot with him (akademiya) where he has a big crush on reader and one day accidently confesses to them (like just mentions it without thinking idk), then he starts panicking when he realizes, so reader has to calm him down and also confesses n stuff (Im so normal for him)

you must've heard wrong

synopsis - you were his only friend and he had built a crush, but how he confessed was not ideal for him

includes - zandik/il dottore

warnings - gn!reader, fluff, mutual pining?, wc - 692

a/n: don't be sorry anon! i absolutely adore dottore and all these requests!

it was to no surprise for anyone to be told that zandik kept to himself and hadn't acquired any friends. and he liked it that way. in his eyes that meant he could focus on his studies and he really never understood such menial things such as maintaining a friendship. he didn't even share a dorm room with anyone and in classes he always sat alone. but he preferred ot that way, or atleast he thought he did.

you had always noticed the bluenette in your classes - how could you not? he didn't exactly blend in personality and look wise. and you also heard the rumours, your friends and peers always gossiping about him as you just sort of awkwardly smiled at them. surely he wasn't as bad as they made him out to be?

and it seemed that eventually curiosity got the better of you as you now had a newfound mission to get to know him better no matter what. but you had no clue how to go about it, so you started with simple things such as asking to move next to him in classes to talk to him during lessons. sure he may of blatantly ignored you but you weren't going to be deterred that much!

after the initial meeting with you, zandik immediately assumed you were put up to it. some kind of prank or joke on his expense. he didn't care but it seemed a bit excessive that you had been insisting of trying to get close to him for so long. it had been a few weeks by now and now he was slightly confused. there's no way you would entertain a prank for that long but he still held doubt toward you actually trying to get closer to him.

and even with the idea of you wanting to be more friendly toward him, he was still against the idea of having friends. but somehow you had managed to work your way into having some kind of friendship with him. he had finally let you have a small win, deeming you slightly worth his time. and by that he meant having brief conversation with you in classes only.

but soon they turned into you seeking out his company outside of clases and yet again he was hesitant but your presence became more and more bearable. which you took as a compliment. he slowly started letting your presence bleed into his routines . soon your presence was something he started seeking out. you had become one of the only bearable people in the akademiya for him.

but with that said, something he never predicted was him actually catching feelings for you. he pushed them away at first but they kept bubbling to the surface whenever he was near you, the confession practically dancing on the tip of his tongue, but his pride wouldn't allow it. and if anyone was confessing first it would be you.

but turns out he would confess first. he had allowed you to tag along for a very rare out of his room study session. ot was in the library and he needed a specific book, so you both sat at a table in a very far corner. you had soon gotten distracted and started talking to him about random thoughts. and soon one of those thoughts had lead you rambling on about something you loved.

and out of pure curiosity you asked him if he loved anything. and almost without hesitation he said 'you'. and it seemed he hadn't registered ot intil he noticed you staring at him almost slack jawed. that's when his face burst into a deeo shade of red as he used the book to hide his face as he said he 'didn't mean it like that' or 'you misheard him'. but you lowered the book and calmly told him that it was okay because you liked him aswell.

it did little to help his embarrassment but you hoped it calmed him down a little bit. but it did feel good to get it off his chest and he was very happy that the feelings were mutual.

#x reader #x gender neutral reader #genshin impact x you #genshin impact x gender neutral reader #genshin impact x reader #genshin x you #genshin x gender neutral reader #genshin x reader #genshin dottore #genshin zandik #dottore x reader #zandik x reader #🐓 anon ↩

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squidd325 · 9 months

Note

Hi, I want to ask do you have any headcanon about how Fang date boboiboy 's element?

Oh, absolutely! Thank you for asking, be prepared in advance for a 100-page essay though >:D /j

To me, Fang and BoBoiBoy have a chill, playful dynamic with each other.

I personally like the initial direction of the Original series that BoBoiBoy and his elements are the same person, the only difference is the core personality that shapes into which element.

Galaxy is still relevant but more in terms of world-building and less about characterization is my most preferred take :>

⚡ With Halilintar:

As Halilintar represents anger and Fang has a lot of pride, I feel they’re the easiest to provoke each other, either playfully or consequently leading to a fight (at the end of the day, they’d just show off their powers and act cool about it).

They’d have solo training sessions somewhere devoid of people, that’s the kind of ‘ideal’ date for them.

🌪 With Taufan:

Taufan embodies the desire to be free and out with the world. Fang fought for his autonomy at the end of Season 3 Original. I feel they’d be able to empathize with each other a lot.

Taufan loves the sky and space, perhaps he’d tag along with Fang on space missions, watching the stars through the window while Fang is driving, just the two of them in the monitor room is enough for a ‘date’.

⛰ With Gempa:

Fang and Gempa are very grounded in their duties, responsibility and diligence are qualities both possess.

They’d bond over midnight coffee and piles of paperwork, while jokingly telling each other that this is like a date.

It is, isn't it?

🔥 With Blaze:

Whenever they find each other in the same room, Fang would know BoBoiBoy is distressed about something, and Blaze would want to spend time with him.

And spend time they do. Soccer, basketball, any physical activities,... you name it. Only that Blaze gets over-excited at times and may or may not accidentally damage something(s) and/or place(s)...

In the end, Fang just invites him out for ice cream instead.

❄ With Ais:

Ais has that “don’t care” attitude that tests Fang’s patience more times than not. This BoBoiBoy handles emotions by pushing them away and Fang would call him out for that.

Yet, Fang gets overwhelmed sometimes. Ais would just silently motion Fang to join in his activity, which is to lie down and do nothing. None says a word and it can be perfectly kept that way.

🌵 With Duri:

Duri wasn’t explored thoroughly in the Original Series, so I can’t exactly tell what he represents. I like to think he holds a mischievous strike though, it’s part of his childlike personality and aligns with BoBoiBoy’s whole person.

Duri would prank Fang to no end. And as annoyed as Fang is, he isn’t unfamiliar with pettiness. They’d pull all sorts of tricks until one gets tired and calls it quits. Then it’ll just be a pleasant afternoon where they tend to the garden together. That’s dating for them, I suppose.

☀️ With Solar:

Goodness, they contrast each other to the core. Light and dark, contradicting yet complimenting one another. Solar is always eager to show off his wits, and Fang never goes down without a fight (when it comes to BoBoiBoy, that is).

In every library that exists, there are THEM. The library at school, in space, on another planet, etc. I imagine them going through every book, competing to see who understands the subject most.

No books could tell them how actual dating works though. Still on the right track, imma tell ya...

#fangboi #asks_🦑#art_🦑

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vidding · 1 year

Text

On June 23, 2021, You Tube announced that any Pre-2017 unlisted videos will be made private on July 23, 2021. Why? BTW this is an attempt to raise awareness about an event few fans may even know took place and highlight the importance of supporting archiving projects. It's written by those directly involved - any re-blogs are appreciated. An example of a rescued vid is at the end. Security update: Why? You Tube screwed up when it first developed unlisted videos. There was a loophole. Any unlisted video that was added to a playlist would automatically be made public. Oops! June 23, 2021 was when they made a formal announcement about their efforts to rectify it. You Tube's Solution? - Blanket privatization of ALL pre-2017 unlisted videos & then apply the security update for all new unlisted videos going forward. What if you don't want your pre-2017 unlisted videos to be made private? Filling out a form telling You Tube to do nothing is one option. Great for people who don't mind filling forms to send to You Tube. Make your videos public. 🤨 or download them and reupload them then make them unlisted with the new update. 🙄 You can watch the video below for descriptions of all the options. Most not ideal. Official Video: Released June 23, 2021. You can watch it whenever if you want to, but I must say contrary to what one would expect it is a very clear explanation without too much technical jargon. However, it doesn't really explain the obvious ramifications of this.

youtube

What are the freaking Ramifications: You Tube is 18 years old. What?!?!! 😲 Yeah, I know. Any pre-2017 videos would account for more than half of You Tube's history (11 years) and therefore fandom's history on You Tube. How many fans would be aware they had a 30-day notice and could act in time? Were you even aware of this?

More Issues: More importantly, how many users with abandoned accounts with noteworthy, valuable unlisted fanvids are no longer around to fill out a form. How many "Dead Embeds" would be the result of this when the videos go private. Many prefer to Unlist and Embed on other sites. Unlisted is not the same as private. It only means the videos can't be searched and found on You Tube but is available to anyone with a link or Embed. Private basically means no longer accessible and limited to people who were emailed a link directly.

There were only 2 people in Fandom (to my knowledge) who worked on rescuing content like that. We had about 2 weeks before the July 23, 2021 deadline to archive about 11 years of Pre-2017 unlisted fanvids and ask questions later. One of those people was Morgan Dawn and the other was myself. Other archive teams did work on this but their focus was on other types of videos related gaming, political history, anime, etc. Essentially non-fandom. In a nutshell, our collaboration led to the rescue approximately 12K unlisted fan videos. 12K fanvids that would have been made private forever and unable to be seen. The Work About 50% of that total came from accounts that had never uploaded a video since 2018. The work involved required more technical knowledge & resources than we had ever used before on any prior archive projects. There were several brand-new archive techniques we developed specifically out of necessity during that intense time period. One example was renting multiple virtual machines to sift through thousands of playlists just to find a fraction of unlisted videos. There was so much at stake. What happened with the content that was archived?

To my knowledge, there isn't an Open Doors for fanvids. There is just a few dedicated individuals who may be bad at promoting their work. Let's face it, when there is a fire at a library you marshal all resources to save as many books as you can and worry about everything else later. If archiving speaks to you whether that is fanzine, oral history or fanvid related, then there are certain things you can do:

Follow this Tumblr (we will post about relevant projects here)

If you have time, ask us how you can volunteer on projects and see if what we offer works for you. You can always opt out.

Re-blog this so that maybe someone who does have time sees this.

If you don't have time support our Patreon https://patreon.com/vidding

If you don't have time or money like this post acknowledging you appreciate that this work is being done even if you can't assist in those ways.

Choose whichever options work for you if possible.

This kind of work is done by very few people and not necessarily by those you would think would do this type of work. It can fly under the radar and so can support. This is an attempt to raise awareness which sometimes we are too busy to take time to do. If support doesn't go to the right places projects like this may never have happen or may not be as successful as they could be. This Unlisted You Tube Project is a perfect example of something a lot of fans may not be aware even took place. Thank you for whatever method of support you choose. The following experience was brought to you by archiving.

The following vid is one of the 12k saved. It's a Kirk/Spock vid. You will not find this vid anywhere but here. I know. I went to the original vidder's You Tube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@xKelociraptor and they have other vids on there. Last vid uploaded 11 years ago and no contact info. You want to know the kicker? I looked at all the other vids they have available but the best one (in my opinion) is the one that was unlisted & rescued. Unlisted vids are not necessarily unfinished projects or bad takes of a final version that should not see the light of day. They can in some cases be the best vids you will never see.

If you liked this post you might like this:

The last vidder friendly hosting & streaming site?

#fanvid #vidding #archiving #Youtube

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imagines-random · 10 months

Text

Love story

Pairings/Characters: Loki x reader

Summary: Your love story.

Warnings: A bit of angst but nothing too major! (Maybe bad writing and grammar lol. English isn’t my first language!)

Song: Love Story (Taylor’s Version) by Taylor Swift

A/N: Thank you so much for reading!!

We were both young when I first saw you

High above the revelry of the grand ball, in the quiet solitude of a moonlit balcony, Prince Loki and your’s worlds collided.

I close my eyes and the flashback starts

The soft glow of the stars illuminated the regal figures as they stepped into the cool night air, unaware that the balcony's edge marked the precipice of a future entwined in love.

I'm standing there

You, drawn by the beauty of the night sky, found yourself on the same balcony, a serendipitous encounter orchestrated by the unseen hand of destiny.

On a balcony, in summer air

The ball was running smoothly.

As the princess of Alfheim you have learned to survive in these types of situations.

Boredom was becoming something familiar to you.

See the lights, see the party, the ball gowns

The door to the balcony opened. You didn’t turn, not until the stranger walked to the rail next to you.

See you make your way through the crowd

It was Prince Loki, his eyes reflecting the weight of royal responsibilities, stepped onto the balcony, seeking a moment of respite from the grandeur below.

And say, "Hello"

“Hello” he says as he bows clumsily.

“Nice to meet you Prince” you bow to him

“Loki please, call me Loki” he smiles at you taking your hand in his.

“Nice to meet you Loki” you smile at him.

“Do you want to be friends?” Asks little you.

“Yea !” He replies and grabs your hand running of to the garden dragging you with him.

Little did I know

Kids. What can you say, pure souls that don’t understand the complexity of life or trust.

•a few years after•

Inside of the palace library, Loki and you found yourselves in a conversation about the age-old tale of Romeo and Juliet. You, captivated by the tragic romance, clutched a worn copy of the book against your chest.

That you were Romeo, you were throwing pebbles

“Come on Loki! The book is good! It's such a beautiful story of love and sacrifice.” You argued back.

And my daddy said, "Stay away from Juliet"

“Good? That melodramatic play? I find the whole thing rather ridiculous. Two impulsive teenagers meeting a tragic end over a fleeting infatuation.” he chuckles.

“It’s a love story! It's so romantic! The intensity of their love, the willingness to defy their families for each other—it's like a timeless symbol of passion.” You smiled at him

And I was crying on the staircase

“Come one now darling. Passion, or youthful recklessness? I can't fathom why anyone would idealize such impulsive behavior. Real love requires more than just poetic proclamations.”

“But isn't that the essence of love? To be willing to risk everything for the person you can't imagine living without?”

Begging you, "Please don't go"

“Yeah which is why it was so stupid. I believe in a more practical approach. Love shouldn't be about making grand gestures and meeting tragic ends. It should be stable, sensible, and built on mutual respect.”

And I said

“Does that mean you've never felt a love so intense that it defies reason?”

"Romeo take me somewhere we can be alone

“I prefer a love story without unnecessary drama. One where both parties think with their heads rather than their hearts.”he smirks.

I'll be waiting, all there's left to do is run

“Perhaps you haven't found the right story to change your perspective yet. Romeo and Juliet may be dramatic, but it's a testament to the power of love—flawed, yes, but undeniably powerful.” You smile at him.

You'll be the prince, and I'll be the princess

“Well, I'll stick to tales that make sense. No tragic romances for me.” Rolls his eyes.

It's a love story, baby, just say yes"

As the debate continued, the words of Shakespeare's timeless play lingered in the air, creating an intriguing contrast between the romantic ideals cherished by you and the pragmatic skepticism of Loki.

•a few years later•

In the heart of the castle, Loki and you harbored a shared secret that flourished under the veil of night.

So I sneak out to the garden to see you

Drawn together by an unspoken connection, they each yearned for something beyond the regal confines of their chambers

We keep quiet 'cause we're dead if they knew

And so, as the moon ascended the velvet sky, casting its silvery glow upon the palace gardens, they embarked on a clandestine journey.

Loki, with a heart that craved adventure, would slip past the guards with the agility of a fox.

So close your eyes

You, full of sneakiness, would evade the watchful eyes of your attendants, tiptoeing through moonlit corridors to the rendezvous point beneath the ancient rose arbor.

Under the blooming roses, Loki and you found in the quiet of the night. The fragrance of blossoms mingled with the whispers of a thousand secrets as they shared stolen glances and laughter that echoed through the garden.

Escape this town for a little while, oh, oh

Loki, burdened by the weight of future responsibilities, discovered in you a confidante who understood the struggle between duty and desire.

'Cause you were Romeo, I was a scarlet letter

You, yearning for a life beyond protocol, found in Loki a kindred spirit who shared her dreams of a world unfettered by royal expectations.

And my daddy said, "Stay away from Juliet"

The garden, once a canvas of muted greens and blossoms, became a sanctuary painted with the hues of your emotions.

But you were everything to me

As the sun dipped below the horizon, casting a warm glow over beautiful Asgard, you found yourself standing at the stables. The air was heavy with unspoken emotions as you waited for the warriors to arrive. The ones who would accompany the person who had become the center of your world – Loki.

“Darling?” Loki said from behind you.

“So you have to go?” You said without turning to look at him.

I was begging you, "Please don't go"

"I'll miss you," Loki managed to say, his voice betraying the vulnerability he had kept hidden for so long.

And I said

You smiled, a bittersweet expression that mirrored the conflicted emotions within. "I'll miss you too, Loki. More than you can think."

"Romeo, take me somewhere we can be alone

You watched as Loki prepared to mount his horse. The warriors and his brother Thor were there too. All ready to leave. To risk their lives.

I'll be waiting, all there's left to do is run

As they began to leave with Thor guiding them, you looked at Loki hoping he’ll change his mind and stay. He didn’t.

You'll be the prince, and I'll be the princess

With a final glance, Loki rode into the horizon, leaving you waiting. Everyday you found yourself looking to the horizon, waiting for the day when Loki would return.

Days turned into weeks, and weeks into months.

It's a love story, baby, just say yes"

The ache of Loki’s absence lingered, leaving an empty space that seemed impossible to fill.

You navigated the routines of life, haunted by memories of shared moments and the laughter that echoed through corridors now too quiet.

•a few years later•

You stood before your father, a solemn determination in your eyes. Your father, concerned about the stability of his kingdom, had proposed an alliance through marriage to a prince from a neighboring kingdom. However, you, guided by your love for Loki spoke your truth.

"My dear days, this union is crucial for the prosperity of our kingdom. Prince Dominic is a worthy match, and the alliance will strengthen our realm."

Romeo, save me, they're trying to tell me how to feel

"Father, I appreciate your concern for our kingdom, but my heart belongs to another. Loki, who went into distant lands to protect us, is the one I await."

"Loki is presumed lost, and we cannot delay vital alliances for a hope that may not materialize. Dominic is noble and willing to forge a strong bond with our kingdom."

This love is difficult, but it's real

"Father, my heart tells me Loki will return. I cannot pledge my heart to another when it already belongs to him. I will wait for Loki, for his love is the anchor that guides me." You said standing your ground.

Your father, torn between duty and his daughter's unwavering love, sighed deeply.

Don't be afraid, we'll make it out of this mess

"My dear daughter, I understand your feelings, but we must prioritize the kingdom's stability. Let us hope for Loki's safe return, but we cannot put our future on hold indefinitely."

Meanwhile, unaware of the ongoing conversation, Loki had just returned and after hearing the news about your arranged marriage he sought with your father to request the your hand in marriage.

It's a love story, baby, just say yes

“Your Majesty, I come with the utmost respect and sincerity. I've grown deeply fond of your daughter, and I wish to ask for her hand in marriage.”

Oh, oh-oh

I got tired of waiting

“Prince Loki, while I appreciate your candor, I have reservations about a union that may complicate our diplomatic relations.”

Wondering if you were ever coming around

“Your Majesty, I am committed to fostering a strong bond between our realms. My love for your daughter is genuine, and I believe together we can bridge any divides.”

My faith in you was fading

As Loki persisted in his plea, expressing his dedication to both the princess and the prosperity of their kingdoms, your father found himself grappling with a decision that balanced matters of the heart and the stability of the realm.

When I met you on the outskirts of town

“Prince Loki, your sincerity has not gone unnoticed. I shall grant my consent, but I implore you to approach this union with the commitment and diplomacy it deserves.”

And I said

And so, after persistent appeals, the love between you and Loki triumphed over political considerations. The kingdom awaited a union that would not only bind two hearts but also forge a new chapter in the history of their realms.

•the wedding day•

The grandeur of the royal palace was adorned with cascading flowers, sparkling crystals, and an air of anticipation as guests gathered to witness the union of two souls destined for each other.

"Romeo, save me, I've been feeling so alone

The ceremony took place in the palace courtyard, where an ornate archway adorned with blossoms framed the couple, symbolizing the intertwining of their lives.

I keep waiting for you, but you never come

Prince Loki, resplendent in regal attire, stood at the altar, his eyes gleaming with a mix of mischief and affection as he awaited his beloved.

Is this in my head? I don't know what to think"

You, radiant in a gown that seemed to capture the essence of moonlight, descended the grand staircase.

He knelt to the ground and pulled out a ring

As you walked towards Loki, a hush fell over the gathered assembly, captivated by the ethereal beauty of the moment.

And said

Underneath a canopy of stars, Loki and you exchanged vows in a magical courtyard.

"Marry me, Juliet, you'll never have to be alone

"I promise not to play too many tricks, my love, except when it comes to stealing your heart every day." He smirks teasing you.

I love you, and that's all I really know

"And I promise to see past your mischief, cherishing the kind and tender soul beneath. Our journey will be a grand adventure, Loki."

I talked to your dad, go pick out a white dress

With rings exchanged and a kiss sealing your vows, the celebration echoed with laughter and music.

It's a love story, baby, just say yes"

"To us, my enchanting bride!"

Oh, oh-oh

"To forever, my mischievous groom!"

Oh, oh-oh, oh

As you danced under the moonlit sky, the union of Loki and you became a tale whispered in the winds of the enchanted realm.

'Cause we were both young when I first saw you.

#marvel #loki #tom hiddleston #loki the god of mischief #loki season two #loki series #loki of asgard #loki show #loki season 2 #lokius #loki x female reader #loki x reader #loki fluff #loki angst #loki god of mischief #taylor swift #love story #Spotify

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justsome-di · 6 months

Text

Personal Book Recommendations

I'm just curious about this more than anything.

If you follow me, you may know that I work in a library, am earning my MLIS, and have my BA in English. This means that I work with a lot of books, I read a lot about books, I see a lot of books, I have read a lot of books myself, and I professionally recommend a lot of books.

My knowledge ranges from pop fiction to classics to indie in adult and young adult fiction.

I'd like to offer $5 book recs to anyone who is looking for a personal rec list.

This would be ideal for people who are in a reading slump or who never really built up a habit of reading.

I would rec books that are well-reviewed, diverse, and that match your preferences as well as possible. This list will be made entirely by me. Not AI.

I can re-do your list once if you've already read the majority of the books on the first list or if, for another reason, you can't read them!

I would offer the book list of 10 titles based on your preferences, a little advice on how to improve reading habits depending on what your specific situation is (if you need it), and just for fun, the book list in the size of a bookmark if you'd like to print it out and keep it with you.

These are the examples of what they would all look like:

I'll use Canva to design your list, and everyone will get a different background. That speaks volumes about my own graphic design skills, but at least the list will look pretty cute!

If you're interested, you can fill out this Google Form. The form asks about genres you like, your favorite books, and other related questions.

It will close after 5 responses. Please read the description of the Google Form before filling it out.

If you have questions, please DM me or send in an ask!

#booklr #books #reading recommendations

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lupinusalbus · 11 months

Text

Protect the King

Even within the emotional morass created by season 8, I think an essential truth of what will be ultimately be written in the books has been revealed: Sansa will try to protect Jon and his claim.

Working backwards from the final episode of the series, we see a key revelation in one of the final scenes, the one in which Jon says goodbye to his three Stark siblings/cousins. When Jon tells Sansa that the North is free because of her, Sansa's reply is "But they lost their King." In the script it actually reads "true king."

In some ways, this line from Sansa makes little sense. Sansa's original intent in revealing Jon's true identity was at least twofold: she wanted to foil Dany's ascension to the Iron Throne, but she was also attempting to protect Jon from Dany's jealousy and selfishness. Sansa's attempt to disrupt Dany's conquest did rattle Dany, but it ultimately failed insofar as Jon was not crowned. Presumably, had Jon inherited the Iron Throne, he too would have granted Northern independence in an ironic reversal. Yet Sansa tells Jon that she'd wanted him to be restored as King in the North. Perhaps it's being implied that she pushed for this off-camera, after Bran was crowned. We never see the ensuing discussion of Jon's fate. But in either scenario, Jon would be a king.

When Jon made Sansa and Arya swear not to reveal the secret of his birth (because of Dany's demand that he not do so), Sansa attained more insight into Dany's character. We saw in the Winterfell library scene between Sansa and Dany that Sansa saw into Dany's lack of selflessness. Dany was not really there in the North to save humanity from annihilation; rather it seemed to be more out of revenge for Viserion, and for her own self-aggrandizement. It was "Jon's war" that Dany was fighting, not an epic struggle for the world's survival. It seems possible that this conversation provides a lot of subtext that was likely gleaned from Martin, even in the hurried and garbled context of season 8. Sansa's insight is that Dany lacks Jon's integrity. This was not made explicit enough in the show.

Instead of acknowledging Jon's claim, Dany seeks to obscure the truth of it. This caused Sansa to question Dany's murky motivations even more. Wouldn't a person of integrity seek to honor the truth of another, especially a person whom she supposedly loves? Instead, Dany demands that Jon bury his truth in order for her to pursue her own glory. Just as she once disregarded Daario's feelings at being left behind in Meereen, she is more than willing to set aside Jon's feelings of love and obligation to his sisters. Her singleminded pursuit of the throne barely masks her inner ruthlessness and rage.

Why fans of Daenerys are in denial about this aspect of her character is sometimes hard to fathom. If Dany truly loved Jon, wouldn't she seek to honor his truth, wouldn't she somehow have been pleased to have discovered that she was not "alone in the world" anymore? No, Dany turned her back on her own blood and disregarded his value and feelings out of ruthlessness and selfishness. Her lack of moral scruples, lack of mercy, appears to be at the root of Jon assassinating her. The plot element of Dany's downfall, to my mind anyway, has nothing to do with any feminist ideal that many try to ascribe to Dany. This is because Jon didn't want the Iron Throne. His threat to Dany originates in his integrity and in his superior leadership qualities. That is why Sansa believes many people will prefer Jon to Dany; why he is "someone better."

Even in one of the show's trailers to season 8, we can scope out the subtext of Sansa's protection of "the king," Jon Snow.

It's the trailer that shows Jon, Arya and Sansa in the crypts of Winterfell, where they are seemingly confronted by their own tombs. What is the language and symbolism presented in this trailer? We see Lyanna's feather, and hear her voice begging, "protect him," as Jon walks by her statue. We then see Sansa walking by a statue of Catelyn Stark. Catelyn's voice is heard in a show-only line in which she berates herself over her inability to love a motherless child (Jon).

Isn't it interesting to speculate about why these specific themes were chosen as the trailer for the final season? Why do we see Lyanna's feather again (which Sansa picked up from the crypts back in season 5)? Why do we again hear about Catelyn's guilt over Jon, even though it may be mostly a show invention? It must be because it will be canon that it's Sansa's fate to carry forward Ned's promise to Lyanna, and also for her to somehow set right Catelyn's non-acceptance. This is a genuine subtext of Sansa's story, a subtext which may have been muddied on Game of Thrones, but one which nevertheless is still possible for us to discern.

It seems like a very revealing choice for the trailer of the final season. It could have been about Dany, it could have included the Lannisters, but instead it focuses on the Starks, the secrets of their past, on Sansa's role in the final drama. The scene in which Sansa bids farewell to Jon could have focused on her apology only, on her inability to prevent his exile. But she also tells him he should have been The King.

The undercurrent of this understanding will perhaps be made even more implicit between the two of them should a similar scene be a part of Martin's book version. It's an understanding by which Sansa will continue to carry the feather, a symbol of her devotion to Jon and of her bond with him.

#jon snow #sansa stark #jon x sansa #anti daenerys #game of thrones

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edupunkn00b · 8 months

Text

Delirium

Photo by Fleur via Unsplash

Rated G - WC: 2660 - CW: fever, there might be a swear :)

Logan comes home sick from work and Janus cares for him. No-one expected feelings to come out. (Remy did. Remy expected feelings. "Told ya so, babes.")

Janus rinsed his coffee cup and wiped down the counter for the third time, gaze focused more out the kitchen window than on his task. Just over two hours ago, Logan had texted from the office, sounding… off and said he was coming home early. Nearly an hour and a half later, the barista at their favorite café called and said he was bringing his roommate home.

“Thank you, Remy,” Janus murmured, holding the front door open wide as the taller man half-walked, half-carried his roommate inside. “Lo’s really in no state to drive.”

“Yeah, he said he needed a little coffee to sharpen up before he made the trip over the bridge,” Remy laughed, shaking his head. “I make a good brew but caffeine won’t cure a fever.”

“‘M fine, Jay,” said roommate mumbled, left hand flopping up and landing ineffectually against his chest. Logan nodded slowly, brow solemn as though he’d just finished his closing argument.

“Yes, I see…” Janus’ smile dissolved when Logan’s cheek burned under his hand. Ordinarily unflappable, Logan would only show vulnerability like this under the influence of—as their favorite book would call it—extraordinary amounts of alcohol or, as now, a worryingly high fever.

“I’m double-parked, babes.” Remy said, smirking over his sunglasses. “Where d’ya want him?”

“I…” Janus’ gaze trailed up the stairs. Logan’s bedroom was two flights up in their narrow townhouse.

Typically, the layout was welcome. Early to bed, early to rise, he would readily excuse himself when Janus was entertaining… company. It was usually just Remus nowadays, but still. Two flights up from Janus’ room, it was as though they each lived alone once nighttime came around. It was an ideal arrangement.

Except on rare nights like this.

Logan wobbled, stumbling to one side even with Remy’s arm hooked through his and Janus didn’t need to think, he just reacted, reaching for him before he could fall. Logan’s hand wrapped around his, warm. Too warm, Janus reminded himself. “I suppose my room would be best,” Janus finally said and together, they maneuvered him down the hall and onto Janus’ bed.

“Hmm,” Remy hummed, looking around the room. The centerpiece of Janus’ room was a high-set king size bed, layered with pillows and two comforters. Hidden between the layers was his weighted blanket. He’d never really gotten around to furnishing the room much more than that, preferring to keep his library in their shared shelves, and he worked from the dining room or his armchair in the living room. Wherever Logan had settled in with his own reading or case files.

He kept his room dark… ish. The walls were lined with warm faux-incandescent Edison bulbs Remus had fashioned for him out of LEDs and golden filters after he described the giant meta-analysis Logan had sent him on the impacts of artificial light and myopia. The dim light had only made Logan’s little approving smile that much brighter.

“Cozy,” Remy laughed once they were done, then smoothed down his jacket sleeve where it had bunched up with his efforts to hold Logan up. He lowered his sunglasses so Janus couldn’t miss his lascivious wink. “Very cozy.”

“We don’t have that kind of relationship, Rem,”

“Whatever you need to tell yourself, babes,” Remy chuckled as he backed out of the room.

“No… bed’s too big,” Logan groaned, voice muffled by the heavy down comforter. “Too far away t’hold you, Jay.”

Both men froze, heads whipping over comically to stare in Logan’s direction. “Wha—what did you say?” Janus swallowed, eyes wide. He had to have misheard.

“Oh, ho ho ho, Emile owes me ten bucks!” He hadn’t misheard anything.

Remy clapped Janus’ shoulder and started down the hallway. “Congratulations, man. Maybe now you’ll stop crying in your coffee all the time.”

“No, wait!” Janus’ arm snaked out and grabbed Remy’s sleeve. “Remy, no! You can’t say anything!!“ His eyes bore into Remy’s. “He’s delirious and doesn’t know what he’s saying. He doesn’t mean it.”

“Uh-huh,” Remy said, lowering his sunglasses and looking back at Logan who’d curled around Janus’ pillow, rubbing his cheek against the cover. Eyes closed, he was smiling and pressing little kisses into the satin. “Maybe he really, really means it and it’s only because he doesn’t know what he’s saying that he—”

“Remy…” Janus warned, fingers tight on his sleeve as he stared up at the much taller man. “Seriously. Don’t.”

“Alright, alright. Fine,” he said, shrugging. “It’s your funeral.”

“Thank you,” Janus said, belatedly releasing his grip. He pulled his hand back, thumb rubbing over his knuckles and frowning. That escalated quickly, didn’t it? “Thank you,” he said again and nodded, tamping down the embers of protective fire that had sparked in his chest. “I apologize,” he murmured, inclining his head.

But Remy just laughed. “Buy me a coffee and we’ll call it even.” Logan groaned again then, eyes squeezed shut and Janus sat next to him, adjusting the covers. “I’ll let myself out,” Remy said and closed the door behind him.

Janus waved without looking away from Logan and clicked on his bedside lamp.

“Jay,” he said, squinting, and buried his face in the pillow. “Jay, I don’t feel well.”

The admission was almost funny.

“I know, Lo,” Janus murmured, pushing back his hair from his face. His skin was still terribly hot and pale enough that, if he’d wanted, Janus could’ve traced the latticework of thin veins over his eyelids and along his temple. If he’d wanted.

“Rest here and I’ll get you some water and aspirin, alright?” Janus started to rise, suppressing a frown at the way even Logan’s hair seemed overly warm.

Before he’d moved away completely, Logan’s hand shot up and covered his. “You won’t go far?” he whispered, fever bright eyes fixed on him.

“I’ll just be in the kitchen…” Janus promised, voice trailing off when Logan his hand closer. After a moment, Logan stilled and Janus began to wiggle free. Logan’s eyes snapped open at the movement and laced their fingers together. “I’ll need this to get you that aspirin,” Janus murmured, the burn of Logan’s touch both drawing him closer and pushing him to get something to lower his fever.

Eyes slipping shut again, Logan nodded and relaxed his grip. Giving his hand one last pat, Janus whispered, “I’ll be right back.”

Leaving the door open so he would hear Logan’s calls, Janus dashed down the hall and back to the kitchen. He clicked the kettle on, then grabbed a basket from the top of the fridge and filled it with Gatorades from the fridge, a box of tea, apple sauce, Logan’s travel mug, and a pack of his favorite crackers.

The kettle clicked, water bubbling, so Janus unplugged it and grabbed the whole thing to set up in his room, basket hooked on his arm. Hot water would be one fewer thing he’d need to leave Logan’s side to fetch. Finally, he grabbed a bottle of aspirin and the thermometer from the medicine cabinet as he passed and hurried back into his room.

Logan sat on the floor, one arm out of his shirt, the other twisted behind him. His trousers lay crumpled in a heap next to him and his collar was up over his head, tie loosened by not removed. “Oh, Lo,” Janus muttered and set the kettle and the basket on his nightstand. “May I help you?”

“Please.” Logan’s voice was quiet and Janus wondered if perhaps he’d even drifted off. Kneeling next to him, Janus finished removing his tie and unbuttoned the rest of his shirt, a little sigh of relief sneaking past when he saw Logan’s undershirt. Relief. Not disappointment.

Perhaps… a tiny bit. It would be easier to regulate his fever without it.

“There you go,” Janus murmured once Logan was free of his shirt. “I put your glasses on the nightstand, too, Lo.”

Logan leaned heavily against the side of the bed, eyes cracked open. He nodded then closed them again. “‘Ank you,” he whispered, hands flailing until they landed on Janus’. “Y’take care of me.”

“Anytime you need me, Lo,” Janus murmured. “I’m going to help you up onto the bed now, okay?” Logan’s head sort of wobbled in agreement, so Janus released one hand and curled his arm around his best friend’s back before pushing up to his feet.

Logan mumbled something unintelligible and leaned into his side, fever bleeding right through Janus’ shirt.

“I’ve got you, Lo,” he encouraged. “There we go,” he sighed once Logan was again seated on the bed. Holding him up with one arm, Janus stretched, snagging the aspirin and a Gatorade from the nightstand. “Have this, then rest.”

Humming, Logan curled into his side and let Janus feed him two tablets, sipping slowly. When he’d managed to h get about a quarter of the bottle, Janus recalled it and returned it to the nightstand. “It’ll be here for you when you’re ready for more.”

“‘nk you,” Logan mumbled again, curling on his side and twisting his fingers in Janus’ sheets. “‘nk you, Jay,” he said again, more breath than words. “Love you.”

Janus froze mid-rise, back curled over the bed as he reached to fluff the pillows under Logan’s head. He didn’t mean it. Remy’s little leer danced through Janus’ mind and he almost didn’t notice when Logan hugged his hand to his own chest, pressing kisses against his arm. “Love you, Jay,” he repeated, painfully clearly.

Patting Logan’s hand and ignoring the thrumming in his chest, Janus sucked in a slow breath. He’d never remember anyway. “I love you, too, Logan,” he whispered. “Rest well.” After a moment, Logan’s grip loosened and his brow went slack as sleep took him. “Rest well, love.”

Logan dreamed. He was at the beach, warm sand beneath him, warm sun overhead. Far from the shore, but close enough to hear the gentle susurations of the waves and catch a bit of the breeze coming up over the water.

“Lo? You’re dehydrated, drink…” Janus appeared, watermelon daiquiri in hand. Logan drank deeply, then kissed his fingertips. Janus’ skin was soft against his lips, nails, as expected, perfectly manicured. There was the tiniest hint of calluses at the edges of his forefinger and thumb and he smelled like… bergamot and sage.

“Thank you, darling,” Logan murmured as he lay back against the sand. “That’s perfect. You’re just what I needed.” He sat up, gripping Janus’ hand between his own. “Do you know that? Have I told you? You’re just what I needed. Always.”

“Shh, Lo, relax… Rest, love…” Janus’ voice blended with the sounds from the shore, the soft rush of water and breeze, and Logan nodded, eyes slipping shut.

“With you,” he smiled and drifted to the quiet crash of the waves.

The waves grew louder until Logan woke to… stickiness. His mouth was simultaneously dry and pasty, tongue adhering to the roof of his mouth, his teeth, his lips. He cracked open his eyes but quickly squeezed them shut. He’d fallen asleep with his light on and even the small glare from his desk lamp was enough to sear his eyes.

His bedsheets stuck to his skin and he was… damp, like he’d slept with the heat on too high. Fumbling blindly, he reached for his eyeglasses and knocked over an empty plastic bottle before his hand closed on the cold glass face of an old-fashioned analog alarm clock.

Logan bolted upright and waited for his eyes to adjust to the light. A plush yellow comforter slid off the bed and onto the floor and tiny glowing golden bulbs dotted the walls. This wasn’t his room. He swung his legs over the edge and picked up the mostly empty Gatorade bottle he’d knocked down. He stared at the bottle in his hand for a long moment before uncapping it. His eyes flew wide open at his first whiff of its remains. Watermelon.

Tightening the cap, he set the bottle back on the nightstand and finally found his glasses. Shoving them on his face he looked around the room. Janus was sound asleep near the end of the bed, feet propped up on the far side from where Logan had been laying. Hands shaking, he picked up Janus’ blanket and sniffed. Bergamot and sage. “Love you, Jay… Have I told you?”

Oh fuck.

Reality and dream merged, the muscle memory of those words fresh in his mouth. A thermometer sat next to Janus’ clock and he thumbed through the history. 104.1, 104.5, 103.9…

Taking pains to make no noise, Logan straightened the blanket on the bed as much as he could without disturbing where Janus’ feet were propped. He found his trousers folded neatly over a chair, his shirt and tie hooked on the back of Janus’ door. Logan managed to get his shirt back on but as he lifted his foot to put on his trousers, his toes caught on a beltloop and he tumbled forward, crashing to the floor.

“Lo!” Janus was at his side, one hand at his back the other already checking his knees. “You’re up,” he murmured, one cool hand coming up to his forehead even as the other worked to untangle him from his clothes. “Your fever broke,” he smiled, bright enough to burn.

Logan looked away. “I—I—I did not intend to wake you, Janus, I apologize. You’ve… you’ve been caring for me?”

“Of course, Lo. You were pretty out of it.” Did Janus sound… sad? No, just tired. He must’ve been up half the night with him.

“Thank you,” he said, then clamped his mouth shut before he could voice the questions burning in mind. He remained quiet while Janus helped him up and turned, remaking the bed while Logan finished dressing. “Thank you,” he said again.

“Anytime you need me, Lo. You know that.”

“I should… ah…” Logan’s mouth worked. How did he ask what he wanted to know? “H—how long was I out of commission?” he finally managed.

“Remy brought you home last night.” Janus gestured to the clock and the dark sky just on the other side of his window. “Last, last night, I suppose. You’ve been sleeping for about twenty hours?”

“Ah,” Logan nodded.

“You, um…” Janus moved to the side of his bed and patted a space a respectful half-foot from where he sat. “Will you sit?” He wouldn’t quite meet Logan’s eyes. His hands were carefully folded in his lap, thumbs turned in, tiny twitches in his tendons the only tell to his fidget.

Logan nodded again and sat where Janus indicated. “I… I believe I know what you wish to say, Janus.”

“You do?” Janus’ brow furrowed and even his thumbs stilled. “But how—”

“I have some… fleeting memories of the past day or so and I recall…”

“Lo, I’m sorry,” Janus interrupted and Logan’s shoulders sank before he remembered himself and sat up straight. It was better this way. Janus planned to be kind as he let him down easy. They could move forward. “I never would’ve said those things if I thought you’d remember. I…”

Logan’s confusion must have been obvious because Janus’ words fizzled out. “What things?” he asked. “I…” Janus’ voice from his dreams filled his mind.

“Rest, love…”

“Oh,” Logan laughed. “I… I believe I understand.” Swallowing hard, he reached for Janus’ hand. Cool and soft. Callused fingertips just where he expected them. He laced their fingers together and they fit just right.

“I don’t,” Janus whispered, eyes down at their intertwined hands.

Logan slid just a little closer and Janus matched his movement. Watching Janus’ eyes, he raised his hand and brushed a kiss against his fingertips just as he had in his “dream.” “Maybe we can start there?” He took a breath and chance and smiled at Janus. “Darling?”

A soft chuckle spilled from Janus’ lips and he squeezed his hand tighter. “I like the sound of that, love.”

#sanders sides #janus #ts janus #janus sanders #loceit #logan sanders #ts logan #logan #sanders sides fanfiction #sanders sides fanfic

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jasntodds · 1 year

Text

Caving In [14]

Pairing: Gar Logan x Fem!Powered!Reader, Jason Todd x Fem!Powered!Reader

Words: 7,539

Chapter Warnings: Swearing, angst, depression (canon, Jason), the roof scene is in this chapter and reader is the one who finds him so, the Titans being assholes, mentions of a burn

Summary: ❝Tell me Atlas: What is heavier, The world or its people’s hearts?❞ You never expected your life to end up this way, turned upside down by an infamous Gotham villain. It’s been a living hell, every single day, until Dick Grayson brings you to Titans tower where you meet Gar Logan and Jason Todd.

A/N: So, I finished writing the rest of this book and have started the next one which I also have had almost entirely plotted out this whole time and I’m excited lol I am easily motivated to post more often when I get feedback 😂 You can add yourself to the tag list below, ask me to be tagged, or you can follow my library blog @jasntoddslibrary and turn on notifications if you prefer that!!

series masterlist | masterlist | tag list

As the morning goes by, you and Gar spend most of it in the living room. You ate your breakfast together, far earlier than ever intended but it was kind of nice because it was just the two of you. The rest of the Titans were still asleep and Jason only came by to pluck a pancake off of your plate before going back to his room. You and Gar do spend enough time alone but not having anyone else up, besides Jason, is really nice. You just get to be around each other without knowing that someone is going to interrupt or you'll have some type of training session to get to. It's nice and comforting.

One by one, the Titans get up, Dick being the first one and he's surprised to see the two of you awake and in the living room so early, especially you. You’re not an early riser. He doesn't ask questions though and hopes it's because you had trouble sleeping and not because you and/or Jason were up to something that Gar had to talk you out of. He just lets you be while you and Gar have a rewatch of The Walking Dead.

"I'd totally survive the apocalypse." You let out a sigh as you turn on the fifth episode.

Gar lets out a laugh beside you. "You could survive anything at this point."

"Right? Probably don't even have to try." You turn to face Gar. "Okay, if the apocalypse happens," You start and Gar raises his brows at you, intrigued where this is going. "Do you think it'll be like Walking Dead, Zombieland, The Last Of Us, or Love and Monsters?"

Gar lets out a breath, looking to the ceiling before looking back to you. He's definitely thought about this. "Walking Dead or The Last Of Us, both of those seem realistic."

You let out a booming laugh. "True! That would be the most likely scenario, even in a world with metahumans."

"It's also better than Zombieland zombies that can run."

"I know! That makes the whole thing a bit more terrifying." You shake your head. "But, I hope we end up with Love and Monsters because I mean, giant animals."

"That would be ideal." Gar gestures towards himself.

"A green tiger would be very normal."

"Exactly!"

Your laughter subsides and you fall into a comfortable silence. Gar resituates and guilt eats away at your bones. He winces when he moves and you figure it's because his side hurts. You swear you'll be apologizing for it every single day until you both die. You’re very grateful for him though because he is very understanding of it. You think most people would have dropped you, wanted nothing to do with you, and wouldn't trust you anymore. But, not Gar. You’ve already apologized several times since it happened and Gar has been telling you that it's okay and he's okay with a kind smile. You’ve said it before and you'll probably always think it, Gar is unfathomably kind.

"Are you sure you're okay?" You ask, guilt coating your words.

"I'm positive." Gar chuckles softly. "I'm fine."

You nod softly. "I'm still really fucking sorry."

"It's okay." Gar urges you before taking a drink of the Gatorade. "It was an accident."

"I know." You let out a sigh. "But, I'll probably be trying to make it up to you for...the rest of our lives." You laugh softly.

"You don't have to. Rachel nearly took my hand off and I'm fine."

"She...what?" You pause.

Rachel even accidentally attacking Jason makes sense. Jason pushes her buttons more than anyone so if she were going to snap, it would be on Jason. But Gar? What could Gar have possibly done?

"Yeah, I woke her up when you guys got kidnapped. Her cloud of razor blades attacked me."

"Okay, that's not fair. How are you the one getting hurt by us?" You groan. "I'm really sorry and I'm sorry I didn't know."

You were a little preoccupied with being kidnapped and tortured and then nearly dying and nearly losing Jason. You not noticing is excusable but that doesn’t stop you from feeling guilty about it. Gar was still hurt and you should have noticed. Gar would have noticed if the roles were reversed.

"You were kidnapped and then dropped from a skyscraper. I think not knowing is acceptable." Gar chuckles.

"Yeah, that's true." You shrug a shoulder. "Still, I'm sorry." You scrunch your nose. "So, whatever you need, let me know and I will get the thing." You declare, your voice confident.

"You're not gonna budge on that, are you?"

"Nope." You let out a laugh.

Your conversation gets interrupted by an alert coming from the intercom system. The two of you look at each other with confused expressions before getting up to see who's at the door. Everyone you both know is already at the tower, besides Dick, he left out of nowhere, but he doesn't need the intercom system to come up.

When Gar hits the button for the video and sound feeds on the intercom, you both see a woman with strawberry blonde hair looking a little panicked.

“My name is Eve Watson and I’m looking for someone who I think might be here.” She says, voice panicky and rushed.

You give Gar a shrug as he looks to you.

“Maybe you should go get Kory.” Gar whispers and you nod before running off to get Kory.

Someone showing up, in general, seems a little weird. You’ve been at the tower for three months and no one besides Uber Eats drivers ever show up at the tower. But, somehow this random woman knew you had weird flying guy? That seems a little off.

You find Kory in the room with the mystery guy, talking with him while he’s still unconscious.

“Uh…Kory?”

“Hmm?” Kory looks over to you. “What’s going on?”

“There’s some woman here?” You question. “Gar is talking to her through the intercom. She says her name is Eve Watson and she thinks she’s looking for someone here.” You look from Kory to the mystery guy before looking back to Kory.

“Okay.” Kory nods carefully as she gets up. “Let’s go then.”

Kory and you make your way back down the hall and back to Gar.

“Is there someone named Conner there?” You and Kory hear Eve say through the intercom just as you approach.

“Let her up.” Kory says and Gar takes a second look at Kory, almost to be unsure about it but he does as told.

The woman comes up through the elevator, Gar, you, and Kory waiting for her to come up. When she does, she has a white dog with pointy ears walking beside her. It’s in that moment, you trust her.

You’ve always wanted a dog but your mom would never let you get one. They’re a big responsibility and you didn’t have a lot of money. With your mom being a vet, it always seemed strange you didn’t have a pet. You understood the reasoning but it did not stop you from asking every birthday for a dog. But, now, there is a dog right in front of you and you haven’t been able to pet a dog since you were uprooted from Gotham. This is the best thing that’s happened in two weeks.

“She has a dog.” You whisper to Gar.

Gar chuckles softly. “She said the dog lead her here?”

“Oh, so a smart dog.” You smile almost visibility vibrating next to him.

“Are you okay?”

“Love dogs.”

“You think we have Conner?” Kory asks.

“It sounds crazy, but the dog led me here.” Eve explains. “Tall, dark hair, looks like Superman.” Even lets out a sigh.

“Come with me.” Kory jerks her head towards the hallway.

Your smile falls as you watch the dog follow the women down the hallway and Gar lets out a laugh.

“Why don’t you go with them? I was gonna take a nap anyway.”

“Are you sure? We could finish--”

“Go see if you can pet the dog.” Gar continues to laugh. “I’ll catch up later, wake me up before they leave though. I also want to meet the dog.” Gar beams and you laughs, nodding quickly before darting down the hallway.

You follow the women to Conner’s room, Kory noticing you. Kory doesn’t say anything though, figuring maybe you want to offer some help. After what happened with Deathstroke, Kory is willing to let you hang around for right now if you want to help. While Kory agrees that allowing any of the new Titans to go after Dr. Light would have been a bad idea, you sympathizes with you and Jason.

You reach the room and Eve sits down on the bed beside the mystery guy who’s still unconscious. The dog sits on the floor beside Eve and while the women talk, you stick your hand out for the dog to sniff you. The dog doesn’t seem bothered so you sit on the floor and cautiously pet his head. A giant smile plasters itself across your face as you pet the dog, now listening to the women talk about how Eve created Conner and how he ended up here. She goes on about how he’s going to die unless they can bring the sun directly to Conner. But, this is Kory. So, she has an idea and goes off to grab Rachel.

“So, you like….created him?” You ask, still petting the dog.

“Yeah.” Eve lets out a sigh.

“That’s pretty cool.” You state.

“It’s dangerous.”

“Yeah,” You sigh. “Having powers in a world like this seems to be. But, like, he’s half Superman and Kory will fix him so…pretty cool.” You nod your head. “What’s his name?”

“The dog?” Eve asks and you nods excitedly. “Krypto.”

“Krypto.” You smile looking at the dog. “I love dogs. Is it okay that I’m petting him? He didn’t seem to mind and you were talking.”

“Yeah, it’s okay.” Eve laughs softly.

“Hey, uh, you know, Conner saved my best friend.” You explain.

“He did? How?”

You shrug. “Dunno, exactly, I was dangling for my life but from what I’ve heard firsthand and what everyone else said, my friend was falling from a fifteen-story skyscraper and Conner came out of nowhere, jumped on a car and caught him mid-air.” Eve watches you carefully. “Look, I’m just saying you feel guilty and shit but had you found him earlier, it’s possible my friend would have died so I don’t think you should feel guilty about it.”

“He could die and that’s my fault. I created him and didn’t help enough.”

“No, you said that you helped him escape. They were gonna use him as a weapon, probably. You helped him and Kory is gonna save him. She’s a badass, trust me. So, you did good.” You offer her a kind smile.

“Thank you.” Eve says softly before looking back to Conner.

After a few minutes, Kory comes back with Rachel and she directs you, Eve, and Krypto to wait outside of the room. You sit right back down with Krypto, petting him while Kory gets Conner out of the bed and holds him up. She warns you it might get a little bit warm before asking Rachel if she’s ready. Rachel is a little uncertain and so are you.

Rachel has a hard time controlling her powers and you don’t really know why Kory trusts her so much to keep them in check right now. But, you trust Kory so there has to be a reason. Rachel uses her powers and her black and purple smoke surrounds Kory and Conner while Kory turns into a ball of fire. Your jaw nearly hits the floor as you watch.

“What…the…fuck.” You mutter and Eve has the same expression. “Sick.” You’re awestruck look turns into one of amazement and a giant smile comes to your face.

When Rachel brings her power back in, Kory stops and Conner is awake again. This definitely goes down in one of the coolest things you’ve ever witnessed and you find yourself having a little more respect for Rachel. Rachel always spoke so highly of Kory and maybe this is one of the reasons. Kory believes in Rachel enough to trust her to use her powers and not kill her. Not that you think Rachel could but it’s the trust that’s there and maybe that’s the whole issue with the tower right now. You, Gar, and Jason trust each other. But, Jason and you don’t trust Dick very much. Rachel doesn’t trust Jason and you think she doesn’t trust you very much because of your close proximity to Jason. The only person everyone collectively trusts is Gar but that doesn’t make for a very good team and you wonders if the Titans will ever work because of that.

Kory, Rachel, and you leave Eve, Conner, and Krypto to themselves, going your separate ways so they can talk. You head towards Gar’s room to tell him what just happened but his door is still shut and you know if he were awake, the door would be open. After last night, you do not want to wake him up so, you head two doors down to Jason’s room. You knock but then open the door, finding Jason standing in front of his windows, just looking out.

“Jay?” You call but he doesn’t even move. You walk beside him, looking from his eyes to the windows and then back to him. “Jason?” You wave your hand in front of his face and that seems to break him out f his trance.

“Fuck, yeah?” Jason jumps, spinning to you.

“You alright?” You ask, brows furrowed and the excitement you just felt vanishes and you worry about your best friend again.

��Yeah, what?” Jason snips and you narrows your eyes.

“You were just standing here…looking at the window?”

“You got a problem with that or something?” Jason snips again.

“Oh, snippy today.” You roll your eyes and walk over to one of his chairs, Jason shaking his head in confusion.

“Sure, make yourself comfortable.”

“I usually do.” You chortle. “Wanna know what just happened?” You ask, dropping the conversation about him because he doesn’t want to talk about it and you’re not gonna push him. Not today because maybe you owe him that much for last night.

Jason sighs and turns to face you. “Sure?”

“So, some woman shows up because of the guy that saved you and turns out, dude is named Conner and he is half fucking Superman and Lex Luther.” Your eyes nearly bug out of your head and Jason’s eyes widen.

“You’re fucking lying.”

“I could not make this shit up!” You exclaim. “So, she shows up and she’s got this dog with her who’s really cute. I got to pet him.” You beam and Jason finds it cute that you got sidetracked by the dog not the whole Superman and Lex Luthor thing. “So, in order to wake up Conner, Kory grabbed Rachel and turned into a ball of fire while holding Conner and Rachel used her powers to like keep it contained.” You ramble. “I know you don’t like Rachel or her powers but dude, it was the coolest shit I have ever seen.” You beam. “And Conner’s awake. Like, it worked.”

“He’s awake? From that?”

“Yeah, I guess it was something with kryptonite, that’s what he was shot with.” You explain.

“That’s…”

“Sick, right?” You ask.

“Yeah, that’s fucking sick. So, a ball of fire just wakes him up from a coma?”

“Guess so.” You laugh. “And there’s a dog.”

“You said that.” Jason chortles. “Didn’t realize you were a dog person?”

“Do I seem like a cat person to you?” You quip.

Jason laughs. “You're into Gar who turns into a fucking tiger.”

You pause before narrowing your eyes. "Yeah, but that's different. Tigers are not house cats." You hold your up and Jason shake his head at you. “So, it was super cool and I had to tell someone about it.”

“Gar not wanting to listen?” Jason quips.

“He’s napping, after last night I figured I’d let him nap.” You explain.

Jason nods just once. “How’d it go? After I left my own fucking room for you guys.”

Jason mostly asks because he wants to know if you both actually talked about your feelings or if you backed out of it. He figured Gar wouldn’t but he thought maybe you would. You didn’t seem too confident in your answer to Jason last night. You back out of a lot of the games you two play so he thought maybe you’d back out of telling Gar. He doesn’t hope for that though.

“Uh..." You furrow your brows. "It went, I guess. He's not mad at me or anything. He's being understanding, ya know?” You smile shyly.

"Did you tell him?" Jason asks, more or less digging for answers.

You pause for just a second, thinking about playing the game. But, then you think about how that would be unfair. You both made your decisions.

"No..." You let out a scoff. "It did not seem like the right time and..." You shrug, hiding more of the reason because you’d not about to tell Jason the reason you didn't tell Gar is because you like him. "I don't want him to feel obligated to tell me the same thing because I said it. I'll tell him eventually." You shrug it off and turn the question back to him. “You’ve been hanging out with Rose a lot…?” You question.

Jason gains a goofy grin. “She kissed me last night.” Jason announces.

“She what?” You nearly yell and you can feel the burning start in the very pit of your stomach. Definitely not jealousy.

Jason shrugs. “Yeah,” He has this cocky smile as he licks his lips.

You don’t need to know that Rose kissed him and then Jason put a stop to it like how he did with you last week. You don’t need to know that little bit of information.

“You really like her?” You ask, the slightest bit of snark in your voice that Jason absolutely catches.

Jason shrugs again. “Think so.” Jason laughs softly because he can’t have you. But, he likes Rose enough. He could like her more if he gave her a fair shot. Rose is different. Jason can’t break or hurt her. Deathstroke took care of that. And Gar isn’t into Rose.

“Good, I hope she makes you happy. She’s pretty cool.” Your words taste sour on your tongue but you swallow your pride anyway. You do want him to be happy. Jason deserves to be happy.

“Yeah, thanks.” Jason chuckles softly. “She got mad though, like right after.”

“What, why? You’re not that bad of a kisser.” You tease him, trying your best to brush it off.

“Shut the fuck up.” Jason groans, but there's still a hint of his cocky grin pulling at his lips. “I borrowed Dick’s records, he had one with her brother’s name on it. She freaked out on me.” The smirk falls as he shakes his head, brows knitted together.

“That’s weird.” Your brows furrow. “Have you talked to her about it?”

“Told her I didn’t know about it, think we’re alright now. But I didn’t even know she had a brother.”

“Seems getting information out of her is like getting information out you. Pulling teeth.” You chuckle softly. “I don’t know that is weird though.”

“Yeah.” Jason lets out a sigh but before either of you can continue the conversation, Rachel comes barging in.

Rachel storms right up to Jason and starts yelling. “How fucked up are you?” She yells, your eyes widen. “All you do is give people a reason to hate you!”

Jason just stares at her. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“The crosses on my mirror!”

“Still don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about.” Jason’s voice is flat but Rachel doesn’t believe him.

Her eyes turn red as she shoves his shoulder. “Don’t fucking lie to me!” Her voice is lower and freaky with the shove.

“What the fuck?” You jump up from your seat on his chair, moving to stand in between them. "Leave him alone." You grit your teeth and you don't want to do this today. Why is she even blaming Jason?

Jason pauses for a second. He's not going to stand here and be blamed for something he didn't even do. He's been in his room since he got done training two hours ago. “I’m sick of this shit.” Jason mutters, grabbing his jacket and storming out of the room.

“Literally, what the fuck, Rachel?” You stare at her, fists balled at your sides but just for a second before you follow Jason, Rachel right behind you.

You’re questioning the universe right about now. You desperately want to know why either of you can’t seem to catch a fucking break. Seriously, what could either of you have possibly done to piss the universe off so badly? Especially Jason. He actually hasn’t done a single thing and yet he keeps getting dealt these hands and now Rachel is jumping down his throat. It’s ridiculous.

You and Rachel follow Jason into the living area where Dawn, Hank, and Kory are.

“Don’t fucking walk away from me!” Rachel screams past you.

“SHUT UP!” You scream, trying to catch up to Jason.

“Woah, hey, what’s happening?” Dawn asks from her seat at the snack bar.

“Jason drew crucifixes all over my mirror!” Rachel points her finger at Jason standing ten feet away from him while you’re smack in the middle as you all come to a halt.

“Bullshit!” Jason looks at Rachel.

“Jason, it’s okay if you’re angry.” Dawn says as she approaches the three of you.

“I didn’t do shit, okay?” Jason’s voice sounds desperate this time. “Look, don’t blame me for her voodoo issues.” Jason says as Donna walks in from behind him.

“What’s up with all the drama?” Donna asks as she stands next to Dawn.

“Someone drew crosses on Rachel’s mirror and she thinks Jason did it.” Dawn explains keeping her voice kind and calm as usual.

“I know he did it.” Rachel declares.

“No, he didn’t, Rachel!” You interject. “You’ve just got fucking problems with him so you’re first fucking response is to blame him.” You roll your eyes and cross your arms.

“Cute idea with the Bourbon bottle.” Hank starts, making his way towards the older women. “Not my type though. I’m more of a Sour Mash guy.” Hanks says, this time Jason and you looking at him with confusion having no idea what he’s even talking about. “You ever go into my room and pull that shit again, I’ll forget what team you’re on.”

“Why Jason?” Donna asks.

You let out a huff. You can’t believe you’re listening to them blame him for absolutely no reason. And when you look to Jason, he looks completely heartbroken and devastated. He has no idea what they’re even talking about. You don't think you'll forgive any of them for the look on Jason's face right now. And the fact none of them even see it, makes the whole thing that much worse.

“I don’t know what happened, guys but I-I didn’t do it.” Jason says, his voice defeated. You’ve never heard him stutter before.

“What about the picture of Elis?” Dawn asks.

“The orange soda bottle?” Donna asks, everyone pointing fingers at Jason.

“He did it to you guys, too?” Rachel asks.

“Fuck this.” Jason huffs, ready to leave the conversation.

“Hey,” Hank yells. “We’re not done here, kid.”

“You people are insane!” Jason yells, his eyes turning glossy. “I’d rather be with Deathstroke than you assholes.” Jason pauses and you can see his heart literally breaking. “You guys think everything is my fault.”

There it is. He can’t do it anymore. Even though he didn’t do anything, it’s still somehow his fault. He didn’t mean for the Deathstroke thing to happen. It was an accident and he’s the one that suffering the consequences but they’re all blaming him. They’re blaming him for this stuff he doesn’t even understand. What would an orange pop have to do with anything? The Titans have been on edge this whole time and Jason’s beginning to think it’s him. Maybe if he weren’t around, the Titans would be fine. Maybe they would all get along. They definitely would not be having this argument right now. All of this is his fault and he can’t do it anymore.

“Why is that?” You snap your attention to the older Titans and position yourself to be standing with your back towards Jason, drawing your own line in the sand. “He clearly didn’t fucking do it and none of you even suspected him until Rachel decided to fucking lose it.”

“Because I know he did it!” Rachel screams.

“Why would he do it, Rachel?” You screams over her. You’re going to lose your mind, you can feel it.

“He hates me, Y/n! Unless you’re too blind to see that!”

“You almost fucking killed him! Of course, he hates you!” You fight back, catching Rachel off guard. You will throw her under the bus. She’s gonna throw Jason under the bus, you’ll the same to her.

“You did what?” Kory asks.

“Yeah? In training, she lost fucking control and almost fucking killed him. Lifted him ten feet into the air, aimed a bunch of swords at him.”

“He hit me when I was down!”

“We were all blindfolded for fuck's sake! He didn't even hit you that hard!” It's in this moment, you’re positive Jason has always been right about Rachel because this is actual insanity.

Gar comes from one of the hallways looking exhausted. “Can’t a guy get some sleep?” His voice is drowsy and you glance to him.

“No, because everyone in the tower has literally lost their damn minds! They’re blaming Jason for some fucking bullshit!” You throw your arm out towards the older Titans.

“You’re always on his side!” Rachel screams.

“Someone has to be, Rachel! Clearly, none of you are gonna actually ask him if he did it. You’re all just pointing fucking fingers like a bunch of children.” You look at the supposed adults surrounding you. “Hey, uh, right, so how did Jason do it when I was like….with him? Do you think he ran out of his room the second Kory came to get you just do that? That's fucking stupid!"

“He's the only one that would have done it!" Rachel argues.

You laugh. How can anyone be taking this seriously right now? “But he wouldn't even do it! I know he didn't do it! He was barely fucking awake when I walked into his room! How would he have done it?!” You tell a little bit of lie. It's not that he was asleep but he was kind of in a trance when you walked in. Regardless, you know it wasn't Jason. He wouldn't mess with Rachel like that and the more you think about it, the more you’re realizing that almost every single one of their fights has been caused by Rachel.

“We aren’t pointing our fingers at him.” Dawn says calmly.

“Hank is! Rachel is! You asked him about the picture of Elis and you,” You face Donna. “Asked about a pop? How the fuck would he know any of that!? Jason’s right, you’re all fucking insane! You all take down these shitty fucking people with evidence but when it comes to your own, you don’t need evidence to point the finger! What the hell is that about!?”

“Jason is an asshole!” Rachel yells.

“He is! But he isn’t a mind games kind of asshole! And being an asshole doesn't justify being blamed for some bullshit he very clearly did not do! He’s got more of a fucking problem with Dick and Dick is the only one not experiencing this weird shit, isn’t that weird? What the hell is wrong with you guys?” You scoff.

The anger bubbles through your entire body. Every inch of you feels like it's on fire. It's disgusting and appalling that these supposed heroes can blame Jason for this. How do they not see that he's struggling? How have they not noticed he's all but sleeping in the training room and skipping dinner? You know you cannot be the only to have noticed. Gar has. They should notice. They're supposed to be looking out for you four, not making false accusations with no proof or even a motive. It's not right and it's not fair. Jason deserves better than all of them.

“Y/n.” Gar warns softly as your hands start to glow.

“No! Fuck that! Are you all fucking blind? Are Gar and me the only fucking people noticing that he is really fucking struggling right now? And all of you are going to be making it worse! He is practically living in the training room, he’s barely eating, and he’s not sleeping. I know you guys are self-absorbed and for heroes, that’s weird, too but you guys have had to have noticed right?”

The room goes silent. The only one who has noticed is Kory and she isn’t accusing Jason of anything. You can feel the burning start behind your eyes with the silence of the room. This is the most unbelievable thing you’ve ever witnessed and been a part of. How have they not noticed? It's so blatantly obvious and none of them even care. It's cruel.

“Wow.” You nod your head with a scoff. “Good work, team. Good work looking after your own.” You grit your teeth and you can’t believe these people consider themselves heroes. “You know, you get kidnapped, tortured, and then dropped from a skyscraper and let me know how that treats your psyche. He didn’t fucking do it and it’s disgusting you all even think he did.”

“Who else did it then, kid?” Hank questions, crossing his arms.

“I don’t know but it wasn’t him. I know him better than all of you. It wasn’t him, Hank.” You’re nearly whining, practically pleading with them to believe you.

“He drew the crosses on my mirror, no one else hats me.” Rachel declares.

“Okay, let me break this down because you're clearly not using your brain. Mental manipulation works best when the person doing it, lets you believe you’re on the same side. If you were on opposing sides, it’s easier to see through the bullshit. Jason and you are not on the same side, ever. So, why would it be him? Again, he isn’t the mental manipulation type. The closest he gets to it is just talking and talking and talking until you get annoyed.”

“We know it wasn’t Rachel.” Donna states. “Or Gar.”

“It wasn’t Dick.” Dawn chimes in.

“How do you know!? He’s been acting fucking weird as shit lately, too!”

Dick's been kind of down and out lately. He's been checking around the tower and you swear you overheard him talking to himself the other night. Dick seems like he's also losing it. But, again, apparently, the only people who notice are you and Gar. For people who are supposed to be observant, they all suck at it.

“Dick wouldn’t do that.” Hank defends.

“Right, so I should believe Dick wouldn’t do it because you say so but you won’t believe that Jason didn’t do it because I say so. Great reasoning there, Hank.” You gives Hank a sarcastic thumbs-up.

“Hey, watch who you’re talking to.”

“Yeah? The fuck you gonna do about it? I’ve been held captive twice and once was with Deathstroke, I’m not fucking afraid of you.” You scoff at him. “Gonna forget what team I’m on, too?”

“Y/n, come on.” Gar pleads with you.

“This is fucking bullshit and I know you know it.” You look over at him before looking back to the older Titans. “What did he do that is so bad that you guys hate him that much?” Your voice breaks with the question because you can’t imagine him doing anything. You can’t figure out why no one sees him the way you do. Or why none of them want to.

Just as Rachel is about to fight you, the elevator opens and all of you look over, seeing Dick look a little spazzed out.

“He’s here.” Dick whispers as if he’s just cracked some sort of code. “In the tower. Deathstroke’s here in the tower.” Dick explains. “He took pictures of all of us.”

You would very much, also, like to be back with Deathstroke. At least the guy was a little more straightforward than these people. Deathstroke had a reason for the madness. It wasn't a good reason but it was a reason. Meanwhile, the Titans have nothing and Dick had officially lost his mind.

“Dick…talk to me, what’s with the gun?” Hank asks, pulling everyone’s attention to the gun in Dick’s hand.

It’s this moment that confirms to you that everyone in the tower has lost their minds. Deathstroke is also completely insane but you and Jason were tortured by him and even you two aren’t that out of your minds. You aren’t sure what’s up with the Titans, but at this point, you don’t even wanna know. Instead, you figure you’ll use this time to grab Jason and try to avoid the other Titans. But, you look around and he’s gone.

“Fuck.” You let out an exasperated sigh, actively pulling attention back on you. “Shit.” Your eyes widen and the panic sets in. Jason isn’t doing well mentally and now you’re scared for what he’s going to do. Everyone blames him. Everyone hates him. He wants to be with Deathstroke over these people.

“Y/n?” Gar asks, seeing the panic written across your entire body as you approach him.

“Check the training room for Jason.” You rush as you dart the other way and everyone is left confused as to what you could be in a hurry for.

You head to his room first and he isn't there. You don't think he would go to the training room, it's too exposed. But, Jason keeps falling in his dreams and he has a thing for suffering. If it were you, you'd go to the roof so that's where you go. If Jason would rather be with Deathstroke, the answer would be the roof. He’s terrified and you can see it. He has nightmares about falling so of course, that would be his way out. To him, it’s going to be easy and accessible and no one even noticed he was gone.

You run towards the roof door, barging through it and the door flies open. Your heart sinks as you sees Jason standing on the ledge, looking straight ahead. Your feet come to a complete stop and you swear you never thought you’d have to talk someone down from this. And you hate that he even feels this way. He deserves so much better. But, you have to swallow the lump that’s forming in your throat and walk over to him.

“Jay?” You call quietly, walking carefully as if the roof is a lake covered in thin ice. Any wrong step would send you both into freezing waters.

“They all hate me.” Jason’s voice is so small and it breaks a part of you.

“They fucking suck, Jason.” You state, trying to make your voice sound like it’s not about to crack.

“It’s all my fault.”

“It’s not your fault.” You hold your voice steady as you close the distance toward the ledge. “None of this is your fault.” You state strongly. “Cam you please get down?”

“Rachel blamed me first. Maybe if I didn’t tell her to get checked by a priest.” Jason lets out a breath, ignoring the request. He swears everyone’s lives would be better if he wasn’t a part it anymore.

You take a step close to the ledge, looking over it and you feel yourself grow nauseous. You’re sick and tired of these heights but this is Jason. You look up to him and with shaky hands, you put your hands on the ledge and lift yourself up. You take a seat, letting your legs dangle as you have a death grip on the ledge. Jason glances to you with just his eyes, daring to not move his head. You’re never going to let Jason be alone in any of this. If he’s going to stand on the edge, you’re gonna be right there with him. He will never be alone if you have anything to say about it.

“Her dad possessed you, traumatized you. That wasn’t her fault, but it was her responsibility to apologize for it and listen to you about it. That’s not on you, Jay.”

“I just keep fucking up.” His voice quivers as he moves his foot forward and you nearly break.

“Jason,” You rush his name. “I am begging you not to walk off this roof.” You keep your attention on Jason and that’s all you can focus on. You can’t fucking lose him. “It’s not your fault. You’re not fucking it up. Okay? This is on them. You’re just trying to help.”

“I keep falling.” Jason’s voice quivers again. “It won’t stop.” Jason sucks in a breath and now you know why he keeps standing at his windows like that. He’s just reliving it over and over and over.

“Jason, it’s gonna be okay.” You keep your voice soft and gentle as you keep your stare forward.

Jason doesn’t know how you can even say that. It doesn’t feel like it’s going to be okay. It’s been a week and it feels like it happened yesterday. It still feels like he’s on the window washing crane. The Titans hate him for no reason. He’s never done anything to make them hate him. That’s not going to be okay and it’s not going to get better. They’re always going to hate and they’re always going to blame him for anything they can. And it’s his fault.

This always happens. Jason pushes and pushes until people break and pull away. He doesn’t even know exactly why he does it but he does. People try to help him and it all fails. He’s a mess and maybe he’s too big of a mess to ever be fixed. He’s tired of it and he’s tired of feeling like this.

“Bruce wasn’t the first one, ya know?” Jason states. “Who tried to help me. I can make a list. Relatives, teachers, cops, Dick. Nobody's been up to the task.”

You pause and you already knew that all Jason has ever wanted is feel good enough. He sabotages. You get it because you do it, too just in different ways. But, Jason is not all bad. Jason is hard-headed and stubborn and cocky. He can be a little shit and he’s a little too snippy and sarcastic sometimes. But, if anyone bothered to get to know him, they’d know him how you know him. Which is that he’s a good friend. He’ll sacrifice his own feelings for his friends, he’s self-sacrificing, and kind, and funny. He’s charming and a geek in his own way. He’s a nerd and he deserves to be cared for. Everyone gave up way too soon.

“I am.” Your voice is quiet and you peak up at him with just your eyes, keeping your head steady and your words catch Jason off-guard. “I mean it. You know I don’t lie to you. Put that shit on me, remember? You’re not a fuck up. You deserve for people not to give up on you.”

Jason lets out a scoff because he doesn’t want to believe you. “I’ve got a poison in me.” Jason lets out a huff. “Shit spreads. It can affect even the healthiest people.”

“You don’t have a poison, Jay.” You state. “You don’t.”

“Look at what happened to you!” Jason’s eyes water further, blurring his vision slightly as his voice cracks.

“What? Deathstroke?” You scoff. “I was fucked up long before Dick brought me here, alright? Gotham, death, torture, held captive, almost murdered. Almost murdered Jerry. That’s all me, that has nothing to do with you. Deathstroke was gonna happen. If it wasn’t you coming up with the idea, it would have been me, let’s be honest.”

Jason bounces to something else. He’s finding every reason he can to keep standing here. He wants it all to be over, for the pain and the shame and the guilt to just stop. But, he doesn’t want to give up either. There are two sides of his brain playing tug of war. One of them is screaming and crying, pleading to hold a little longer while the other side is cackling and chanting to jump because everyone’s lives would be better without him in it.

“It’s happened before.” Jason starts. “I once spent two nights in juvie and four fucking people died. It follows me like a curse.”

Your brows furrow and you hate that he feels this way about himself. No one should ever feel like that. You want to get off of this roof and hunt down every single person who’s ever made Jason Todd feel like he’s a poison and he’s not good enough. You’ll fight the entire world for him.

“Were you Robin?” You ask.

Jason pauses. “Yeah.”

“Then it’s not your fault.” You let out a scoff and you really do have something again Bruce and Dick. “That’s on Bruce. He’s been Batman our entire lives. He shouldn't need a Robin. He should have been a better Batman. It’s not your fault those people died, do you hear me?”

“I just want it to stop.” Jason’s voice finally breaks and you want to break with him but you can’t.

You want to drag him off of this roof and grab him by the face, scream at him that it’s all going to be okay and that he’s good enough. That he deserves everything good to happen because he is good. There is nothing wrong with him. He is worth the effort. But, you’re so scared that if you make any move towards him, he’ll lose it entirely. You would do anything to get his pain to stop.

“It’s not just you, Jay.” Your voice is soft. “Look, you know I have nightmares, too about all of it. It’s not just you and as long as I’m alive, it’ll never be just you. As long as I’m alive, you will never be alone in this shit.”

“What?”

“If I’m alive, you will never be alone. You won’t go through that shit alone because I’d follow you into the dark if you asked me to. You’re my best friend in the whole world and...I care more about you than I do about almost anyone I have ever met. I’d do anything in the world if you asked me to. You and me. Always.” You pause, looking behind you to see Dick standing a few feet away. “I mean it. You’re not a fuck up and you are not alone. Ever. Fuck, everyone else, okay? I am batshit terrified right now but I’m here with you because I care about you and I’d lose my fucking mind if I lost you. My life would be so much fucking worse without you in it.” Your words more intense and stern with every second. "Fuck them because you're not a fucking poison and you're not fucking cursed. And someone should have fucking been there for you. So, I will be. Now, get the fuck off this ledge.”

“What am I supposed to do?”

“Put it on me.” Your voice is so gentle, it nearly shatters Jason. "I will never give up on you. I will never let you do any of this alone, Jay. Please." You finally look at him with the final plea. Your eyes lock with Jason's and he make the decision. He takes a step back, stepping down from the ledge.

You follow his lead quickly, relieved over the whole situation and you feel like you can breathe again. You close the distance between you and wrap your arms around his neck, pulling him close to you. Jason buries his face into your shoulder, his arms hugging you tightly. Everything is so heavy for him. The weight of the world is drowning him and you are his life jacket.

And Dick sees the two of you and that’s when he gets it. When he gets what it means it has someone who is literally a ride or die. Dick worried about you together after Jerry. As friends, as more than friends, just being around each other. Something told Dick that would just be the beginning and the Deathstroke happened and Dick was certain he was right. But, now, he’s not sure if you’re the cause for each other’s destructive behavior.

You’re both just like that but you both get it. You understand exactly what the other is going through and how to handle it. It’s not about you causing each other to do something stupid, it’s that you both have someone who is there when you do it so you can pick up those pieces. He gets it now and he understands why he should have told the Titans about Jericho from the beginning. None of this would have happened. Jason would not have wanted to walk off this roof had he been honest. Maybe the Titans wouldn’t have disbanded. This is on him, not the two of you in front of him.

“This is my fault.” Dick speaks up, you and Jason pulling away from each other.

“Okay?” You question him, not even wanting to deal with him. This is also his fault, Jason and everything. This is on Dick.

“Deathstroke, all of this is my fault.” Dick admits.

“Yeah, I said that.” You nod your head. You’re not dealing with this. You got Jason off the ledge and would like to bring him inside and shield him from the Titans. “I’ll get Rachel or Dawn or Donna to talk you down though if you need it.” Jason looks at you, a bit surprised by the venom in your voice.

“No,” Dick shakes his head. “I owe everyone an explanation.” Dick sucks in a breath, you and Jason waiting to hear where this could possibly be going right now, of all times. “I killed Deathstroke’s son.” Dick admits.

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