#but i've mentioned some stuff to folks on discord

[octolingkiera]

ok im just opened your blog for the first time. im from your ao3. literally know nothing about you. have not looked at anything on your blog. this may be wildly inaccurate. but here are my extremely specific assumptions based entitled on your fanfics that i’ve read.

- you have an overwhelming desire to form a deep and strong connection with someone. where you are just inexplicably close with them and can’t imagine life without this person.

[ either that or you already have a person/people like this in your life. ]

- seem like the kind of person who owns cats AND dogs. if not you want both. i think. i dunno.

- you listen to lemon demon. or just very internet-e music in general.

- you own a lot of graphic t shirts and colourful socks?

- you’re a theatre/literature nerd.

- you hated playing dodgeball in gym class

- you have an absurd amount of blankets/pillows

- a big part of your sense of humour can be summed up with that one silly video where that dude says “GRASS! I LIED ABOUT THE WHEELS” idk its 12am or smth gimme a break

- you either love milk so so much or hate it with a passion

i dunno if any of that is accurate and like. fair warning i’ve read all your rottmnt fics but nothing else so. shrug emoji.

ohmigosh hello!! :3 welcome to my blog!! it's been a couple weeks since you've sent this so if you've taken a look around yet, i hope you found something interesting lol

when this came in, i read it like three times and showed my friends and i gotta say. i love your energy lmao. ive never had anyone do this before so idk the procedure from here but. i love that all you've done is read my rise fic and came over here and wrote this up and that's it. i love it. this is great, thank you!!! lol

it's overall lowkey a little accurate which is wildly hilarious to me but i guess i can go through and tell you how you did??? lol

you have an overwhelming desire to form a deep and strong connection with someone. where you are just inexplicably close with them and can’t imagine life without this person.

[ either that or you already have a person/people like this in your life. ] does having a close friend ive known for 15 years count?? lol this ask came in the monday before she got married and the day before i flew out to go attend said wedding with all of our close mutual friends, so i'd say this is p accurate. (and as to the desire part... yeah,,, lol)

seem like the kind of person who owns cats AND dogs. if not you want both. i think. i dunno.

i do actually!! i have a dog and a cat rn, but ive had mostly dogs my whole life. two of my grandmas are huge cat people and have always had a lot of cats or fed a lot of strays, so i really love both of them. i couldn't say which i like more lol

you listen to lemon demon. or just very internet-e music in general.

i actually dont listen to much lemon demon, and while i dont quite get what you mean by "internet-e music", uhhhh i do like some meme songs?? if that counts?? lol. a lot of my music tastes can be summed up as "mid 2000s to early 2010s" lmfao

you own a lot of graphic t shirts and colourful socks?

lol most of what i wear is graphic tees, yes. as for the socks,,, yeah, when i wear them lol. i haaaaate socks in general, so i have to get socks i like the looks of so i actually want to wear them. my favorites are pokemon themed, but they slip down my heel really easily, so i dont wear them as much anymore :(

you’re a theatre/literature nerd.

lol, not really, but i do enjoy the occasional musical. i havent read many actual, published books in recent years, but i'm almost always reading Something

you hated playing dodgeball in gym class

brooo i HATED gym class. i actually didn't have a single gym class in middle school and the last time i had a gytm class was the first half of my first year of high school all the way back in 2010 lol

you have an absurd amount of blankets/pillows

again, not really, but i love me a good soft blanket. i love silly little plush throw blankets and also really big warm ones you can snuggle up in on a cold night, but in bed, i don't tend to use a ton of blankets or pillows

a big part of your sense of humour can be summed up with that one silly video where that dude says “GRASS! I LIED ABOUT THE WHEELS” idk its 12am or smth gimme a break

my sense of humor is like 80% vines so like. yeah lol

you either love milk so so much or hate it with a passion

milk is good!!! i used to drink it a lot more when i was younger but not so much now lol

tysm for the ask!!! this was fun and i really enjoyed this :3 thanks for reading and (hopefully lol) enjoying my fics, and i hope you'll keep reading!! i have more rottmnt stuff cooking up (including a huge separated au fic, more prompt fills, a "future character travels back in time" fic, potentially a post movie fic (we'll see lol), and some silly little post episode oneshots ;3) that i hope i can get posted sooner or later lol

[traegorn]

So Remember You Can Find Me Elsewhere...

I love Tumblr, and plan to stay here until the lights turn off or they make me leave -- but honestly I'm always nervous about the future of this platform. So I thought I'd remind you guys that I exist elsewhere online.

My own websites:

First off, I've been maintaining my own website since 1996 and I have a blog there that I started in 2001 when I was twenty and working retail. It is, for better or for worse, the most "me" place online. It has three different domains -- trhonline.com, traedorn.com and traegorn.com -- but they're all the same site. You can always find me and my stuff there.

I'm also part of a collective of creators called Nerd & Tie, which started out as a podcast network but has been branching out into other media. And it, of course, has a site.

I have other websites like Peregrine Lake's site or BS-Free Witchcraft's, but those two places will always function as central hubs for what I (or we) are currently doing. Also, we have independent forums for Nerd & Tie where folks can talk to each other without a corporate overlord collecting data or ads ever appearing (I put ads on my sites -- but not on the forums).

But now on to other social networks and sites I don't run:

First off, my Patreon. Obviously there are perks for my paid membership, but free members can get some updates here, so if you have an account, why not follow for free?

But also I'm on other sites to varying degrees -- so here's the list:

Finally, besides the forums I mentioned earlier, Nerd & Tie has a Discord you can join where I can always be found.

And that's it pretty much? I probably forgot something, but that's it for now.

[wind-up-thancred]

bit of thancred character musing under the cut that im gonna try to approximate from a 6am discord rambling into something i can actually post. both SHB and EW spoilers included

i saw some folks talking on twt about how guilt seems to be a very important factor in his life and i agree. i think a lot of major parts of his character and arcs have been due to guilt over something he did (or didnt even really do, re: the whole goobue rampage situation). it's driven him to work his ass off after louisoix which lead to him getting possessed... but its probably also what motivated him to do better for ryne after being forced to look his fuckups directly in the eye instead of just wallowing about them. but i think, at the same time, he doesnt really seem to, like... actually be proud of himself for a lot of the stuff he's done in order to work off that guilt? the biggest giveaway for that being the line in endwalker on the ragnarok where he talks about his "good deeds" cynically and seems to insist that they were never really that impactful in the first place. that they'll just go to dust when he dies.

in shb, during the ahm areng segment, not only does he talk down on himself in general, but also puts down his attempts to help OG minfilia back in the pre-ARR days... when i'm pretty sure she never even blamed him for the goobue rampage in the first place.

it's all a little bit sad to me, tbh. i've seen some people reason that, because he was only able to escape poverty due to louisoix seeing potential in his thieving skills, he's essentially internalized the idea that he's only really worth keeping around by ANYONE if he's actively being productive, either helping others or trying to fix whatever fuckups he feels he's made. i think that would explain a lot of this

note the "few positive traits" line, which to me comes across as "i was only picked up out of childhood poverty because he thought my skills were useful." though i don't really know how much of that mentality he's managed to work past by post endwalker. he IS able to go off on his own, and mentions that he trusts the scions to keep themselves safe now... but as i ranted about before, the short story points out that he's only really content to rest briefly before he feels obligated again to seek out unrest to try and help, specifically mentioning minfilia again. also, a couple times during the story, notably post ARR after his possession, mid SHB after he's wounded in a fight with sineaters, and post SHB after he passes out due to the weakening soul-body bond, he seems to dislike even having to rest for medical reasons

it's a pretty interesting part of his character to me. idk if the writers specifically had his rigorous upbringing in mind when they wrote these parts of his character, but to me it would make a lot of sense as an explanation for why he's so averse to rest and why he carries so much guilt and why he's so passionate about keeping the folks around him safe. that's kinda been his whole reason for life since he was a kid-- using his skills for the benefit of others. to him, doing anything other than that would be a waste, it seems.

idk. funny guy makes my heart hurt. yes i had all these dialogue screencaps saved and on hand. yes i am a little insane. what of it

[your-local-grinning-cat]

The Ultimate Compilation Callout

Hey Guys! AR OOC once again to say I am 100% done.

I'm done with this. I thought it was finally dying down and the drama was finally getting to be over with but then she came back and is now trying to say that we are the ones in the wrong. And she is STILL trying to blame Leona's mod when, as both @/castaway-achlys and I have stated numerous times at this point, they were asleep during the entire event. They did not ask for us to defend them. We were both just tired of hearing our friend be exhausted and stressed out by her.

And the fact that so many people have come out to give their own experiences of her being rude and cruel to them just proves this is not a singular event.

I'm putting all this under a cut because it's gonna get long guys. In fact, I’m probably going to end up needing to create a couple reblog chains to get it all out.

But I'm done playing nice. I have all the receipts. Like I went allllll the way back to when the discord was first created. I caught her in her first lie.

Which, coincidentally, her very first lie in the Discord server happened on the very first day it was formed. What a way to start.

I call her the Malleus mod as an identifier in these screenshots, because unlike her, I am not petty enough to reveal peoples’ personal information on the internet just because I don’t like them.

HOWEVER. I will remind everyone that she is not JUST the owner of the Malleus account. Even if you don’t want to look under the read more because there are a LOT of receipts, know that these are all her known blogs.

I do not condone harassment. Harassment is basically what started all this. Just block and go.

Malleus Draconia @/therealmalleusdraconia

Falena Kingscholar @/the-falena-kingscholar

Aijuka (A Leona gf OC) @/the-one-aijuka

Jack Howl @/frosh-jack-howl

Fellow Honest @/fellow-honest

Meleanor Draconia @/meleanor-draconia

Baul Zigvolt @/baul-zigvolt

Sebek’s Mother @/thethickestone

Marja Felmier @/marja-felmier

And her latest: Eric Venue @/ericvenue

(Bonus non-rp blog @/thetwistedminds)

Before we get too far into it I will say there is a slight color code! But only a tiny one!

Gross light green color - look at that lie! 👀

Gross darker green color - a lie is revealed! 🤭

Orange - note the date/time! 🗓️⏰

Let me show you what I mean in the lie I’ve already mentioned - her very first one. :)

There we have the orange, telling you to note the date. That’s because I was wanting to make sure it was known that the pet posts were made on the same date that the discord was created.

And then we have the gross light green around Malleus mod claiming that this bunny is her bunny and that it was her bunny’s birthday recently.

Now here is the follow up with the gross darker green of a lie revealed. 😌

And there we have it! The color coding system and her very first lie told the very first day the Discord channel was active and easily disproven with an image search.

Now let’s get into the FUN STUFF! /sarc

We’re going to be doing some rehashing here but I’m also going to probably be including some new things so stay with me folks! This’ll be a ride! Buckle up!

So, originally I was thinking I'd start with the current drama. But considering that a lot of that has already been covered and what hasn't been covered needs more context, I'm just going to keep going in chronological order, I guess.

I've been up for over 24 hours compiling receipts, editing them to protect IDs, and then getting them all sorted so let's finally do this so I can pass out!

First up is something that actually has been covered a bit but I'm going to expand on it slightly - her blatant lie to @/elysia-nsimp (I'm not tagging anyone because I'm not forcing anyone to get notifications on this lmao).

Here's what everyone has already seen. But to expand on the event, we didn't call her out on her bad behavior, even though we probably should have as she had just lied straight to another mod's face about her blog ownership. I simply DM'd the mod in question privately to make sure they were okay and then tried to keep the peace in the main chat.

Because, believe it or not with this major callout post, I don't generally like confrontation. But I stepped in there for Elysia and I stepped up during this for Leona's mod.

Now, later that night, she posts this as if nothing had happened and she hadn't just been told that she needed to work on her roleplaying skills:

Uh huh. Sure. That's your last account. Because you have shown so much self-control when it comes to filling character voids within the twst rp community already. I'll be generous and give you a month before you break.

Now these next ones need a tiny bit of background information and a note: the Malleus mod is German and, as far as we know, lives in Germany. These next pictures are little indicators that she has not experienced the United States at all. These indicators may not seem important now, but they will be in just a little time. So keep them in mind for after the pause.

You cannot tell me anyone who has spent any length of time in the United States has not at least heard of Walmart.

Quick pitstop to say wow! You didn't even make it a month! Congratulations!

Also, note the question from the admin and the pretty obvious passive aggressiveness from me. We were sending plenty of hints that they needed to stop - sometimes coming outright and saying it, sometimes simply implying. Either way, we were all ignored.

She says she's not a mind reader. Well, apparently she's just not a reader period.

Now... a bit of an oddball here. And I want to say I do not necessarily think this is a lie. I am including it for a lie that is coming. The one that I included all those America comments for.

I'm sure you will note that I said that I don't "necessarily think" it's a lie - indicating that I do think it could be a possibility. That would be correct.

She has been lying since day one and, after this doozy of a story I'm about to share with you, I honestly don't know what to believe when it comes to her.

So.. to sum this up...

We went from a cringe ask from an OC account that she didn't want to answer -> the asker wasn't supposed to be on tumblr because they were underage (???) and was trying to date her irl and somehow had all of her information (oh but don't worry guys she deleted the ask!) -> he found her social media accounts and sent her NSFW pictures and started spam liking, demanding pictures of her kids, sent pictures of her at-the-time boyfriend, sent pictures of his family and his kids -> so she blocked him on everything and then started spam creating the rp accounts to see if he did it with other people or if it was just her (...mmmhmmm...) but nope he was only interested in Malleus -> she then apparently moved to America for a bit to crash with her boyfriend because this underage person went to Germany to find he.

Oh, by the way, why was this guy obsessed with her? Oh, he was obsessed with German women. He decided that all German women were pretty. And she's German-Russian! And Russians have intense standards for women you know! After this guy found out she was German AND Russian, I mean... it was only a matter of time before he upped his game to try to find her!

Guys, she's not saying she's too beautiful for her own good - the underage stalker speaks for itself!

Now, since this stalker found her through her Malleus account and was obviously very determined, you would think the first course of action would be to, ya know, delete the Malleus blog. Right?

No, no, no! Then she would have to start all over and, of course, if she switched accounts she would be forced to make a post on her current blog saying what her new blog is and he would just find her there. That's why she's trying to make her other accounts more active than her Malleus account (her Malleus account was still, by far, before all this happened, the most popular of all her rp blogs)!

Can I also mention that in that post announcing her pregnancy ON HER MALLEUS ACCOUNT WHERE SHE SUPPOSEDLY HAS A STALKER, she had tagged ALL OF HER BLOGS AT THE TIME?

But yes, Malleus mod. I definitely believe your story. :)

Please. Please tell me you all can understand why I just cannot find it in me to trust a single word coming out of this woman's mouth.

Especially now that during this whole drama, she has been lying through her teeth and trying to pin the entire blame on Leona's mod.

Now this part is nearly over (thank whatever gods anyone believes in) but let's just post the last few of the "before drama happened" pictures, shall we?

...I'm realizing I didn't underline the part where I called her out for having that many blogs in the gross dark green of a lie caught... oops. This is what happens when you have far too little sleep.

But either way, here is another time when she was called out on a lie of hers. And her little comment at the end means she read it and she acknowledged us.

She just didn't care because it didn't suit her.

~~~~~~

ALRIGHT!

THAT'S THE END OF PART ONE!

Yeah. This is going to come out in PARTS. I can't cover it all in one post because there is a picture limit.

So, I'm going to end up making a reblog chain...

Eventually.

Real talk? I need to sleep. Desperately. It's nearly two in the afternoon where I am and I have not slept yet.

Do not underestimate the power of spite and my loyalty to my friends. Both are very strong motivators.

But my body's needs are finally winning.

When I wake up, I'll have the Ultimate Drama Arc to post and expand upon and then the Return of the Drama Arc.

Yay. (said in the most unenthused voice ever lmao)

Anyway. Enjoy all this. I'm gonna go die. /j

[neon-ufo]

Online shop updated!

I kinda neglected updating and promoting my online shop, but I put some work into it today, adding new prints, keychains and stickers, and finding a cuter layout!

https://neonufo.bigcartel.com/

I added the Falin and Laios prints that people have been asking for, as well as MLP and Eeveelution stickers. I also restocked most of my keychains and added Vampirka and Y2K Anasui charms!

There is also a new batch of greatly discounted A3 prints of some pieces I won't be reprinting, which I want to sell fast so that I can make space for new stuff.

I ALSO restocked my DIO fashion zine! There are 10 books available.

Lastly, I decided to offer tattoo tickets, as I've had a few people express interest in that.

I've also been wondering if I should occasionally offer some of my original ink drawings in my shop, perhaps selling some of my old JJBA inktober pieces from 2018. Would anyone be interested in that?

And since I'm promoting myself, might as well finish this by mentioning I have a Patreon where I share very frequent WIPs and post finished pieces much earlier than on my other social media. $5 tier members get access to a discord channel where they can submit priority requests on my somewhat-monthly request streams.

Alright, I think that's all folks! ☮️

[commodorez]

How would one go about learning how to make something like the cactus?

Like prerequisites, older code, hardware stuff, etc.

The main prerequisites I can think of are being heavily interested in vintage computers, and having the drive to try and fail and then try again.

I started with building Grant Searle's design, borrowing from other working designs as I went. However, for the front panel? That's alot of time designing, learning, simulating in Logisim, and testing with physical logic gates to produce something 100% original and of my own design. I imagine most folks won't want to go to the trouble of designing an entire front panel state machine like I did.

The good news is that there are way more kits that can help teach the necessary skills than ever before! Most notably, Ben Eater's 6502 kit is a really great way to learn many of the things that I've put into practice here. He has a whole youtube video series associated with it, walking through concepts, construction, programming, etc. step by step. Even if you don't build one of his kits, watching them is an informative process. *I* learned alot, even after having built the Cactus.

If you're going the Z80 direction, the RC2014 series of kits can teach you plenty. There's also glitchworks kits in a few processor types, but those tend to be a bit more for the advanced user. There's the 1802 Membership Card but that's small and not really expandable. I could be here all day listing kits that can help teach and build up experience.

I should mention that I have a computer science degree in my back pocket, but learning logic gates or using assembly was only lightly touched on in the course of my studies. Most of the programming I do involved messing around in BASIC anyway.

I really didn't have a game plan for some of it, so alot of my learning process was trial and error. Alot of errors, in fact. Still making them, and learning from them. I also took the harder route to construction, since I didn't know how to use EDA tools for designing PCBs like KiCAD or Altium or Eagle (don't use Fritzing for the love of fuck).

Oh, one other thing I can recommend: reading through contemporary 1970s computing magazines like Byte (check the internet archive for back issues). There are all sorts of cool projects and ideas present that can really guide you. It doesn't hurt to have a copy of Don Lancaster's TTL Cookbook on hand (I think it's in PDF form online).

Finding a community to help you out is also a great idea. Even back in the 1970s, many folks who jump-started the home computer revolution had the Homebrew Computer Club to help them out. Community meetings to bounce ideas off of, and help one another through debugging are essential in my book -- you don't have to work in a vacuum. I've got a few places I've asked for help, most notably the Retrotech Crew discord server. I've had the benefit of friends who also have homebrewed designs like @techav, who have inspired me with their ideas, but helped me out with mine. In turn, as I've learned, I've been able to help out others.

Hopefully that answers your question. Keep 'em coming!

[theinstagrahame]

One of the best things about Crowdfunding is, stuff arrives even when you're cutting way back on spending. A *ton* of stuff arrived in the last month and a bit. Got a bunch of really neat projects in, and it's time to get hype about it!

Why these games rule, under the cut

The Revenant Society: Banana Chan is one of those names that immediately catches my attention when she's on a project. Actually, looking at the list again, the team for this game was stacked, it was a real All-Star Cast. But like, even without the powerhouse designers on the case, this just gets all the things I want in a game: Time loops, murder mysteries, trapped on the Underground. A PbtA game where you solve your own murder is, y'know, a pitch that'll attract my attention.

Hellwhalers: I saw this game coming up through design phases in the Plus One Exp Discord, and it sounded incredible. Using tokens and an old ship betting game, you're part of a whaling crew chasing Moby Dick into actual hell. Maybe Ahab wasn't crazy after all, and maybe we won't survive.

Xenolanguage: I might own everything Thorny Games makes now, because they make games about language. Folks who may not know me might not know that I *love* linquistics. Honestly, if I could repeat college, I'd put more of my time into Linguistics. But due to the linear nature of time, I'll settle for playing games about decoding alien language in a first contact situation. Sorta like that movie Contact. Which, I loved.

Mothership and Desert Moons of Karth: I read through the original version of Mothership a couple of years ago, and it's one I wanted to get more into. When I saw that there was a chance to pick up the full 1e boxset on KS, I jumped. I've also seen tons of people talk about Karth as a really awesome sandbox module for the system, so when I had a little cash on DTRPG from selling books, it was an easy pickup.

Inscrutable Cities: Possum Creek Games told me to back this, so I did (this is a joke, but I do love PCG a whole lot). In reality, I saw Inscrutable Cities on Itch a while ago, and the pitch grabbed me. I love reading solo journaling games (I still haven't found a way I like to play them, if I'm completely honest, but they're really neat reads). Walking through an impossible city is something I'd love to do, so, I have the book for it now.

Reap: Spencer Cambell makes bangers, and bangers only. I'm not *not* on a mission to collect all of his work, but Necromancers? Solo tactical board games, built on Rune? Sure. I'm in.

Luna: Spencer Campbell makes bangers, and bangers only. I also picked up another of his books this month. The Nova universe? Moon cultists trying to destroy the sun? Sure, I'm in.

3 Moonlight on Roseville Beach zines: I played Moonlight on Roseville Beach on my now-defunct podcast, and it's a game that I honestly think about a lot. The dice system was complicated, but in a really neat way that gave the players a ton of really interesting decisions with every roll. What part of my action succeeds? What kinds of complications am I opening myself to?

Anyway, R. Rook put together some characters, mysteries, and monsters for the game, and I really wanted to explore more.

Hiria, In the Margins, A Visit to San Sibilia: I mentioned earlier that I like the notion of exploring weird cities, right? Well, here's two games about that, and a cool bookmark RPG for reading. I listened to San Sibilia played in an episode of Friends at the Table, and it really captured my attention. The questions were fascinating, and they let the players flesh out a city we'd only heard of, but not seen prior to that game. It was a cool coda on a really fantastic and weird season, Sangfielle.

Grandmothership: The title alone had me, but Armanda Haller is a creator I keep an eye on, because she makes really rad stuff. This caught my attention because solving mysteries in a weird, Mothership-esque sci-fi setting, as nosy grandmothers, really just, gets me. I want to do that. I want to live that.

Holdfast Station: I've been watching Stonetop develop through its email updates. It's another PbtA game, but with a robust city-building and city development core loop that, is 100% my jam. (Low-key, one of my favorite games is Dragon Quest Builders 2.) This game takes that concept to space, which is 1000% my jam, in fact.

Spectres of Brocken: Aaron Lim is a designer I got into early on in my foray into games, and I do love Mech Anime. I am eager to see his take on Mech Anime, and I am really intrigued by the way this game handles playsets and worldbuilding as part of the game itself. Really can't wait to dive into this.

Lay on Hands: This is another of those games I've heard about, but never actually checked out. I know Alfred Valley better by reputation than by direct experience, but this is one of those games I hear people constantly telling people to check out. So, I'm gonna!

Penumbra City: Maybe 5 years ago, I read a novella by Margaret Killjoy about anarchists living in an abandoned city, and beset by assholes within their community, and supernatural horrors from without. The world kinda stuck with me, so when I saw she was working on an RPG not in the same world), I was curious to see what that would look like. I haven't cracked Penumbra City open yet, but I'm jazzed to do so.

These two fell off the pile for the big photo, so I forgot:

Deathmatch Island: I enjoyed the Hunger Games and Battle Royale movies a pretty moderate amount, but what really caught my attention here was the promise that players could also break the Reality TV Parody. The use of the Paragon system also caught my attention. After hearing one AP of Agon, I really wanted to see how that would translate into this, and it didn't take me too long reading it to go "Oh, okay, this rules."

Our God is Dead: What if you were a paladin or priest of a faith, and you found out your god was dead? What if you also had like, a bunch of people who really needed that god not to be dead, like this weekend? This sounds hilarious, and I am going to insert it into conversation often to see if people want to play it. Apologies to people who know me.

Eagle eyed viewers may have noticed a second Mothership box. What's that about?

It's a storage box for all my Mothership Zines so far... Except the two that are just slightly too big!

And, some fun comics/graphic novels:

Good Boy Paws: A friend of mine in comics put this together, and it looked extremely cute. A sweet tale of a good boi.

Wine Ghost Goes to Hell: Picked this up because the creator had contributed to Bugsnax, which is a game I enjoyed, and the concept seemed fun. Will have to check it out and report back!

[vaporwavedoggie]

Ahahahah I should probably explain why I'm not on here as much atm, along with most of my other social media.

It's gonna be long but I know I have some folks on here worried about me so I'll put everything under the cut.

Alright buckle up, this will get long.

To shorten things, my chronic pain is significantly getting worse very quickly, along with heart issues.

Not to mention my shit mental health.

But here's the long story:

There's something up with my heart. I don't know exactly what the diagnosis will be, I have a few more tests including a fun little holter monitor placement or whatever it's called.

It's where I wear this monitor over my heart for a few days and press a button whenever I start having flareups. My flareups consist of my blood pressure suddenly dropping very low (I think the lowest it was clocked was somewhere in the 80s/60s range if I remember correctly), headaches, bad chest pain, limb weakness/numbness, sudden exhaustion/passing out, etc.

They did an echo on my heart but the results didn't tell me much other than I have a dialated left atrium. No idea what that means, don't know if it's even related to the shit going on with me. I won't find out until the other tests are done and looked over.

I'm going as far as to try and give up cigarettes for the time being for this. My doc gave me a ton of nicotine patches, so I'm really hoping those will help with the urges. I'm going to be going from smoking about half a pack or so a day to patches that are 7mg of nic, so uhhh yeah.

Another reason why I'm distancing myself from online spaces more other than my personal discord servers is because stressful stuff, discourse, all that makes my flareups much much worse. I'm doing it not to be a bitch, but for my own health. So for a bit I'll probably only post art I occasionally draw n what not.

Now on to the other issues. My lower back keeps me in damn near constant chronic pain. They did an xray on it, and my MyChart (fun little doctor app) said this about their findings:

"Vertebral body heights and alignment are well-maintained. No fracture or subluxation. Pedicles are intact. Mild loss of disc height at L5-S1."

I'm not entirely sure if that's anything important, again, I go to my pcp about it in the beginning of October since there's a few more issues they'd like to test me for before coming to a diagnosis and treating me.

As for my back pain though, it's to the point where it's nearly disabling me physically.

I've had it for many years. Idk exactly when it all started, but I really started noticing it around the time I was 19-20. I have a theory it's because one of my first jobs that I worked for about a year was at a warehouse. It was very physical labor.

I'd be lifting heavy boxes constantly to the point where when I got home I couldn't bend down from the pain. I'd just have to flop down on my bed and pass out. And this went on about 4 days a week for a year.

At first, it started off as a small patch on my lower back, at the base of my spine, not being able to be touched. The gentlest poke would feel like stabbing pain. And it only got worse over the years, with the area spreading.

Now it's to the point where I can't stand for long, and when I sit or lay down I have to shift my position every 10-20 minutes or it flares up. And I dread going to sleep for a number of reasons. Not just because of the night terrors I have damn near every night due to my CPTSD, but because I wake up in excruciating pain most of the time due to not being able to shift my body in my sleep.

Worst part is, when I sleep, I'm dead to the world. If the night terrors aren't too horrible that night, I'm like a rock. No one can move me. Lord knows my husband has tried. And I'll sleep for about 12-20+ hours at a time at this point.

Funny thing is? No matter how much sleep I get, even if I get the base recommended amount without under or over sleeping, I'm ALWAYS exhausted.

My doc has sent a referral for me to get a sleep study but they have yet to reach out to me. I suspect this may also contribute to my heart issues but idk for sure.

So yeah. It's not enough that I deal with shitty mental health issues on a constant, but also chronic physical health issues as well.

Worst part is my family is borderline poverty. Despite everything I'm STILL trying to get a job because my family needs the money, along with others in the house, including my oldest son and teenage son.

Yet for whatever reason, everyone claims they're hiring, yet won't hire any of us. For me, I understand. I always struggled to keep a job due to various issues. But my sons have a completely clean slate, and my roomie has a great resume with plenty of long history, yet no one will hire anyone. Not even McDonald's.

People act like it's all us. We try everything we can, from dressing up in our nicest clothes for the interview, following up with the job, being friendly, giving the interviewer our skills. Worst part is they act like they're fucking impressed, then turn around and claim they've decided to go with someone more qualified for the position, or they're not hiring anymore.

Yes, I know I'll hurt myself if I try working a job and pushing myself beyond my limits every day, but it's taking too damn long for disability to do shit. Disability is very hard to get in Texas for whatever reason and God it's stupid. It usually takes a minimum of 2-3 years for most, and we don't have that time.

The price of rent, groceries, and everything else keeps skyrocketing, yet my roomies won't get a raise on their disability, my husband won't get a raise on his job other than just a few cents once a year.

We're living by the skin of our teeth. Paycheck to paycheck. Most of our food comes from various food banks in the area we make multiple trips to a week.

Then when it comes to my mental health issues, I'm handling it the best that I possibly can.

My CPTSD has been flaring up. Then there's the other shit going on with my head I won't get into.

I'm nearly constantly haunted by trauma and I'm so fucking tired of it. I have to keep myself busy or it creeps into my mind. And I have somnophobia because every time I sleep I'm almost guaranteed to have a night terror. No, prasosin won't help.

Anyways that's a small portion of the shit im going through and why I probably won't be online much until I get shit sorted out.

Is it weird to be the happiest you've ever been in your life, yet also the most miserable??

[leonenjoyer69]

Both your OCs occupy space in my mind lol I love both Harry and Elias. Would you mind giving some more rambles please and thank you? About either one. I just love learning more about them.

VJEKBKDKF TYSM, I'M GLAD YOU LIKE THEM :D it makes me very happy to know that people enjoy my ramblings and art of my lil fellas :3 (also, all you sweet anons are gonna be the death of me with your mysterious identities!)

(SUB NOTE: if anyone ever has any ideas at all or art requests or something for either of my sillies PLEASE don't hesitate to bring them up I would literally love hearing any suggestion or answering any question ever)

Anyways!!! I've actually been waiting to drop a bunch of stuff on these fellas that I've been talking about with some folks on Discord (which y'all can also ask for if you wanna talk to me on there I LOVE TALKING TO YOU GUYS), so thank you for granting me the perfect opportunity >:3 so, without further ado, I shall begin:

First of all, i just wanted to drop my height HCs bc,,,, why not lmao

I can't exactly visualize heights very well in my mind so these may be a wee bit too tall, idk, but yeah! I think giving Hyde an extra half inch would be funny bc you KNOW that mf would just round up lmao. Elias is a bit taller than Hyde, which Hyde kinda hates sometimes, itty bitty fella.

Anyways!! Harry is first up for rambling bc I have less for him rn lmao. I don't remember if ive mentioned it much before on here, but I know I included it in the fic i did for him, and that's his Scottish accent :3 we as a fandom don't write Jekyll's accent enough so I like projecting it onto injured Hyde and now Harry 😌 MORE SCOTTISH JEKYLL PLEASE-

Harry didn't really have to worry about keeping face in the mindscape (except for when around Mind Lanyon, who would pester tf out of him over it) so he fell back to at LEAST having an accent. He partially fell back on it because 1, it made him feel a wee more comfortable, and 2, because of how often he revisited memories from university (specifically during his and Lanyon relationship ofc), so he's used to hearing himself speaking with at least a drawl.

But yeah, that accent kinda sticks with him when he gains control and he has quite a hard time shaking it, which makes for some fun interactions, like when Lanyon's trying to break down his office door :3333

I believe I've mentioned this, but Harry is very very sensitive to most physical sensations (touch, pain, etc.) and has some light and sound sensitivities for a decent bit after gaining control. Because of how long he spent in the mindscape with numbed senses, It really messed with him to suddenly have control again. Eventually he starts getting used to it again, but for the first few days he's practically on the edge of a mental breakdown at every moment. He's also super jumpy from it (and from the ungodly paranoia he got from the mindscape lmao) and is quite firmly "no touch" for about a week (except for when he initiates stuff with Lanyon). Once he gets used to it tho his touch starved ass is a lot more affectionate and such.

One last thing for him! He's also far more sensitive to hunger and thirst sensations/pain, so he tends to take far better care of their body while in control. It took him a short while to get used to eating and drinking again, but he's more than happy to do it, not realizing how much he had missed it. Plus, he's seen how horrible Jekyll and Hyde would take care of themselves, so he certainly doesn't want their neglect to be his downfall. He's also a bit more sensitive to being tired, but can't sleep very well (especially without Lanyon) because of paranoia and nightmares.

OKAY, NOW, onto Elias!! Most all this stuff is from a discord convo that I didn't feel like rewording, so... Sorry if the formatings weird 💀 (questions are indented and italicized, as well as abbreviated)

OKAY SO, For how Henry (or whoever) convinces Elias to switch back:

Elias usually throws some sort of fit when he's initially order to switch back (except for the very rare instances where he's actively wanting to switch back, like when everyone's busy and he starts getting lonely anyways), though most the time he'll simmer down when Henry starts sorta begging or when either Henry or Lanyon (or very occasionally Hyde) lowkey bribe him. Usually Henry (or Hyde) will bribe him with physical touch/affection (hugs, cuddling, kisses, stuff like that), or bonding time, like going out and doing things together and such (or just doing stuff together at the society, like watching Henry do science or doing paperwork 💀). (Also, sometimes Jekyll will just get somewhat impatient and start asking more desperately and the guilt kinda gets to Elias, Henry usually feels bad about it tho) otherwise, Lanyon will bribe him (quite grudgingly, might I add) with more time out, going to the park with Elias in shadow form and talking, or letting him get a gift for Jekyll or Hyde. But yeah, Elias is lowkey like a little affectionate, overactive puppy :3

[...] I misread "letting him get a gift for Jekyll or Hyde" as "letting him get a gift FROM Jekyll or Hyde" and swore for a moment that sometimes Jekyll/Hyde sent gifts to Elias but Lanyon stole them [... ]

LANYON WOULD TOTALLY STEAL ELIAS'S STUFF TO USE AS BARGAINING LEVERAGE 💀 but yes, bribery is the go to, this guy does NOT like being locked away, so when he does it's either out of guilt or he's getting something out of it, hehe

[...] Imagine that since Lanyon is probably taller than elias, he just hides some lf his stuff on higher places so that he cannot reach them, I feel like Elias would annoy the hell out of him so that he stops doing it though (Lanyon puts them back where they where, and when Elias isn't there, he just hides them again) also, I just imagined Jekyll like guilt tripping or manipulating him so that he drinks the potion

Oh he absolutely would, Lanyon would have a whole "confiscated" shelf for it too, and Elias would definitely whine about it with sooo much persistence. AND JFKGKKF YEAH JEKYLL WOULD 😭😭 both out of selfishness and not, since he still hasn't tested how the formula behaves when an alter ego is out for prolonged amounts of time, and sometimes he just wants Robert back.

Jekyll likes Elias, he just has more of a preference for Lanyon. Jekylls probably also got a bit less patience for Elias's whining after dealing with Hyde's for so long lmao, he always feels kinda bad about being mean or anything to Elias tho, since it's kinda his fault that Lanyon split.

Would Lanyon ever like bother Elias with the fact that Jekyll likes him better?? Like maybe, at one point he just gets too tired of him wanting to hang out with Jekyll and says to him that Jekyll just deals with him out of pity, and like Elias then just feeling kinda bad about it and wondering if Jekyll actually likes him??

If Lanyon's feeling especially spiteful and annoyed, probably, but also Elias worries about that enough on his own and bothers Lanyon with all his self deprecating thoughts anyways 💀

How does Hyde feel about Elias?

He's generally guilt free about the whole "splitting Lanyon" thing and /gen likes Elias way more than he likes Lanyon lmao. He still gets that sorta bitter anger and resentment when he looks at Lanyon, but he doesn't get that with Elias. Hyde kinda thinks that Elias is all the best parts of Lanyon (Except for Elias's emotional sensitivity sometimes, but Hyde deals. He feels surprisingly bad when he upsets Elias..) But yeah, Elias is most of the reason why Hyde is complacent enough to actually kinda lay low after messing up Blackfog and stuff, so Jekyll certainly likes Elias for keeping Hyde somewhat in check lmao

And that's everything I have for this!!! Thank you so much for the ask :D

[jadevine]

More acting stuff on exactly HOW American Gods shafted Orlando Jones (and a lot of their minority actors)

I don't know how many of my followers are like... still following me, or if they're just waiting on me to start on a new hyperfixation or update my works, but regarding current events in the fantasy/writing world, the allegations against Neil Gaiman are rocking a lot of people at the moment. Honestly, I'm only SOMEWHAT less upset about it.

You know why? Because I've distanced myself from Gaiman's works/fandoms after hearing how the production team of American Gods treated Orlando Jones, and by extension, a HUGE chunk of the minority cast.

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So it is fairly well-known by now that Orlando Jones started writing parts of the American Gods scripts. The scripts he was rewriting? His character Anansi's scenes, and basically all of the minority actors' scripts.

Given the response to his work (being widely acclaimed), I have no idea if most people realize that an actor taking on SOMEONE ELSE'S WRITING is actually a very bad sign in a production. Yes, even if they're credited like Orlando was, and yes, even if the results are fantastic like Orlando's writing was.

His response to being fired really hurt my heart because he mentioned somewhere that 1) he did not want to end up writing for the show and be responsible for so much, but 2) he kept doing it because the fans (especially the Black community) loved his work.

There are two implications with "an actor taking on writing," that make a nice little "shit is happening behind the scenes" sandwich:

-The actor is taking on an extra job, because

-The writers can't do their jobs.

In one of my Discord groups, I stayed up too late and made half a ramble about why actors doubling up on writing is a bad sign, especially when a non-white actor is rewriting something conceived by white folks.

Now I'm a hopeful theater actor instead of a TV actor, so there's definitely some details I'm missing, but the basics of "what does an actor DO besides memorize the script?" should be a good briefer.

Here are my screenshots behind the "read more" button!

I don't even know how I'd tag this, so I just did "American Gods" and "Bridgerton," but it's not like Tumblr's shitty search function would help me find my own post anyway.

Also, if anyone wants to hear more about my little addition about the OPPOSITE problem, where "Bridgerton's Season 1 had a shitton of unfortunate racial undertones because the writers seem like they just swapped out characters' ethnicities and called it a day, but we know damn well that young, inexperienced, and minority actors don't have the knowledge/freedom to do anything about it," feel free to ask.

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[the-noted-collector]

is Eckil a fae (something of a weird character study post)

Random thought passed around the discord (among other conversation) is that Eckil is fae-coded.

I mean yeah thinking about it, 'strange uncanny human in a moth wing cloak stealing people's bones' sounds pretty much like a fae sighting to be fully honest.

But then I started thinking about it so now we have more thoughts.

The main thought is that Eckil really is just, like, two steps away from being some kind of fae, if they aren't just straight up one already. It sounds weird but I do have points so here we go, mini-essay/character study time. [Upon reflection while writing, a dehumanization warning is likely warrented for the entirety of this writing as it does highly discuss themes of detacting from humanity and explicit seperation. I will also give warnings on mentions of death/killing, mentions of military service/being gone for long periods, commentary on social expectations of the Victorian Era, potentially some discussion of tramua, and general themes of social seperation/detactment/otherness.]

Uncanny

One of the main points here is Eckil's uncanniness. I know I don't post to Tumblr often on it yet (as it comes later in Eckil's Tale then we're at, and I don't usually just post on my ocs here) but thanks to MA developments Eckil has many traits that would be considered uncanny to regular people (more canines, more diamond/rhombus like irises, nails being more akin to claws, overall just...sharper then a human should be).

While it is rooted from MA, and therefore could just be explained as typical Neathy effects of such a study, the specific way it manifests does cause Eckil to seem more akin to something like a fae/changeling or skin-stealer then what often happens when folks change from MA (often becoming more like were-creatures, from what I've seen of some friends). With the potential of further change when they hit MA 7 (and some possible changes soon from hitting 5), I feel it just becomes more likely that they really do end up looking like a fae rather then a human. How MA affects a character's humanity is...up to interpretation, but for Eckil I do think there's a point where it began to seperate them from being fully human.

Something to say on this is also that Eckil actively accepts being inhuman, too. Less a point on them being a fae specifically but it feels important to acknowledge that Eckil does enjoy these changes on a personal standpoint (how they feel on how it makes others view them is...tricky, to say the least, but that's not the point of the post).

Slight Explanation

Another point is..where we start to get into more personality stuff then simply analyzing peligin.

Eckil wants to be seperate from (human) society and it's expectations. While this...arguably isn't a point as to them being a fae, it helps explain some of their actions and feelings, especially towards societal morals and limitations for certain topics (particularly on death and art).

It also makes for a very fragile and strange line when you factor in that Eckil doesn't want to be viewed as not themself. Identity and retaining it is something very important to Eckil, so is the notion that while someone can change they are still the same person. However Eckil's view on being percieved as human is remarkably different (in that they don't care if they are seen as human or something else).

Like I said, this is far less a point for them being a fae, and far more a general explanation of some of the other things I'm gonna bring up, and why they hold some of the views they do.

Viewpoints

Things that don't really factor into either proof of humanity or fae, but feel important to acknowledge as views Eckil has regarding humanity, themself, and morality (particularly due to relevance to the conversation). This will also elaborate some on why Eckil has these viewpoints, which will include references to their past on the Surface and potentially some on their time in the army. Perhaps I'll make another post elaborating on Eckil's life, but for now the references will be as brief as they can understandably be.

• Prior mentioned apathy towards being considered human or other (general thing they picked up from being in the Neath and around humaniod/inhuman folk)

• Prior mentioned apathy/hatred for socialital expectations (this bases some in their experiences of returning from being gone for years and having almost no-one actually listen when they tried to acknowledge that they saw some fucked up things while serving, as well as in being expected to be married and start a family, tying into the next viewpoint mention) [another note here; when they DID finally begin to act different (like expected) and it didn't fall into what people thought was respectable, Eckil did experience a period of being considered bad to be around and became something of a social outcast. Part of why this is hatred, and not simply a dislike or bordering on neutrality]

• Prior mentioned fear towards being considered someone else entirely (once again, based in returning from service and being treated like a entirely different man. Many experiences and shown ideals they expressed before leaving were considered void, and they were expected to act in a entirely different manner, be someone entirely new, and start their own family almost immediately despite this and trying to process everything.)

• Obsession with the human framework, particularly a focus on bones/the notion that humans are marvelous architecture (something that began to be seen early on in the Neath, and likely rooted from Surface experience, that has slowly developed over time, coming to a full realization upon going through Godfall and seeing the Shapeling Arts in full action)

• Change is good, change should be sought, change (particularly a high amount of change) is growth and beauty (this is something that developed during their service, and came into full consideration in the Neath (not that it didn't affect their actions on the Surface, however it factors more when you can literally change your own body parts) [note; Eckil views 'change' and 'developments' as two mostly seperate concepts. Developments are nuanced and can be bad.]

• Death is beautiful (came to light in the Neath after some conversations with the boatman and self-reflection)

• Art can change and be made into new art (this came somewhere inbetween 'death is beautiful' and 'humans are architecture', can't say exactly when)

• Not a viewpoint but a trait that they have yet to acknowledge that skews their mentality around this; Eckil experiences some meshing between themself and inhuman figures (the most prominent example being the Vake during BaL) and therefore has far less qualms around inhumanity. It's due to a few things but important to note as something that happens to them, especially when mental fuckery gets involved.

Actions

Some actions Eckil often takes that could be considered fae-like (or at least something most usual people aren't likely to be doing). Of course, this is mostly of my own analysis and I will have my biases around what is and isn't fae-like; if anyone has a behavior of theirs that I haven't mentioned that they feel could be noteworthy, feel free to say so.

• The whole bonestealing thing. That in general is something a little odd and was part of why I originally began to debate this.

• Connected to this, why they steal bones in the first place (they see it in itself as a art, that can make more art).

• Deliberate use of uncanniness, primarily for hunting or intimidation

• Remarkably casual about things most would consider unnerving or morally wrong (not entirely indicative of being fae-like and not just fucked up, but still) [note: there is some limits to this too.]

• Gets very...antsy about being expected to do something in line with society, regardless on if they would want to on a personal level

• Often simply appears at gatherings, despite being a terrible socializer and disliking encountering new people (admittedly very ????)

• Can be attracted via odd means (often by offering bone or speaking of hunting and murder)

• Despite usual bluntness, becomes very indirect about deals and vows, allowing for easy manipulation of interpretation

And with all that covered...

[iobartach]

GET TO KNOW YOUR ADMIN !!

name — Nix

pronouns — anything at all tbh, i don't mind!

preferred comms — leaning more towards discord than tumblr; i am just a slow replier / not available at times. so gimme a shout if you ever wanna share discord usernames!

name of muse — miguel o'hara / spider-man 2099

experience in RP — coming up fast on 18ish years this july, i think? 🥴tumblr's been the platform i've used the most, i came over from bebo, the original version, way back in the day, and also gave forum and discord server rps a go, but eh, i just like the format of tumblr more? especially for being able to make themes and stuff.

best experiences — fortunate to have had plenty of 'em! with miguel though, i have to say it's been especially fun? i really missed the whole aspect of meeting new people and crafting plots / crossovers when it comes to RP, as i had slowed down on writing for a while to get my career started. but now, i'm so glad to be back at it , more often!

pet peeves/dealbreakers — ahhh, let's see, i've gotten laid back af the longer i've been writing? the things that i appreciate nowadays are when folks take the time out to read over my guidelines, headcanons, bio (it's so poorly written, i am so sorry) etc, but i'm not gonna be a hardass about telling you to do so, either? like, someone taking the time to read my hcs is cool! going the extra mile and mentioning them in threads / plots? damn, kudos to you, i can't thank you enough! and if someone has any questions? my door's always open, i will ramble at you until the crack of dawn about miguel if you give me the chance 😂 but yeah with all that said, i'm not gonna hassle or bother folks if they don't read my stuff or ask me questions.!

that said, though, i do wanna point out that there are some specific things to my flavour of miguel that i'm trying to be consistent about? which, for anyone who's known me for years shouldn't be surprising to hear. i've been meaning to add them to my pinned post for my own / other's reference, and 100% accept that i don't call or jot them down as often as i should, it's all kinda just sitting in my head! oops!

and well... to that end, i'd also like to tentatively say... please don't automatically make assumptions / presumptions about my take on miguel, either? 🙏 yes, he's arisen from the atsv version, which i acknowledge can attract certain... notions. but, at the same time, please respect that he's not a soundboard or a thirst trap. he's a guy that, in my telling, fucked up, royally and is trying to deal with that, in his own way.

same also goes for no meaning no. both in-character and out-of-character. miguel will be blunt / react accordingly to things he doesn't vibe with (physical touch, dehumanising comments [deliberate or otherwise], etc), especially with strangers / unfamiliar people -- and for myself, i've been in enough rpcs for long enough to not allow myself to be strongarmed into doing certain things. i'd expand more about my previous experiences, but a munday post ain't the place for that, so yeah. i just would be grateful for any acknowledgement of this. all i wanna do is write one spidery guy, in relative peace, at my own pace & leisure. cheers !

muse preference ( fluff, angst, smut ) — i'm a glutton for a bit of everything, but i kinda lean lately more towards action and slice of life. fluff is good, but i try to approach it so that i don't overdo it -- same with angst, i thrive on it, but again, all things in moderation ! and of course, if mutuals ever feel like i'm leaning hard towards a particular genre (which i've a tendency to do!), feel free to pull me back a bit, i won't mind!

plot or memes — memes are the balm for my soul, i stg <3 i love how they can be icebreakers, as well as the perfect thing to spark some muse inspiration after spending the weekdays working. i do love to plot, too, and i've been thinking of doing a lot more of it lately, especially as i grow to learn about another mun's muse, but i'm also a bit of a slow burner when it comes to that, largely because of how much of my week is taken up by work (a blessing and a curse :() . so if you're fine with plots & long form threads progressing over months, absolutelyyy hit me up! 👀

long or short replies — cackling me + short reply is rarer than hen's teeth🤣 i can't do one-liners for the life of me, so you'll always get a small paragraph or two. i love doing long replies, especially if my writing muse is thriving, but never fear about matching reply length or anything! i just ... can't shut up, sometimes, lmao.

best time to write — weekdays are a huge hit or miss 🥴 sometimes, i'm able to write, more times, i'm not. so weekends, when i have the time to chill and relax, not stress about things, is when i find my motivation to write thrives the most

are you like your muse? — in one very specific way maybe; little patience for assholes 🤣 . i'd love to be able to take things on the chin, but eh, stupid stuff can get to me at times. if anything, i feel i'm more like miguel's brother gabriel, and i both love and work in tech rather than in science. worked a two-year stint in a medical corpo and i came out the other side vowing to never again do that. 🥴 i'd also love to be a smartass and have miguel's dry wit, but alas i'm just a funky irish potato.🤣

Tagged: @pzfr

Tagging: anyone who wants to steal this!

[countercharmda]

okay! so, i've mentioned it a couple of times, but i think sometime this week i will be doing some cleanup here. ( expect this around december 1st. ) this will include my inbox, my drafts, my posts, my likes, and my follower count. i will probably also be changing my url to the new one i have saved then! it's gonna be very fun and nifty.

the short of it is that i will be softblocking ( or hardblocking, if preferred ) folks who have not expressed interest in writing ic or chatting ooc. if you just got here and are panicking for xyz reason? worry not! here is my interest tracker if you're a bit too nervous to reach out ooc. this meme is also good, if you would like me to come up with some ideas! ( i will hopefully get to these in a timely manner ). and of course, if this feels too much like an ultimatum or a stressor for you, then you are genuinely more than welcome to softblock ( or hardblock ) me and continue on with your day. please curate your space! NOTE: neither of these are required if we are already talking or plotting ooc!

the long of it...will be under the cut, because i am ultimately feeling a little bit rambly.

i've been trying to figure out how to approach my larger following of people who have not reached out to me, and i think this is a good start. i've only been in this rpc for two months and so much i feel like has happened already, and one of the best things to come from it is watching this turn into...more of a community if that makes sense. i like seeing what all is going on with my mutuals and stuff on the dash. i'm aware this is a very chronically online take, but in my defense i have been...chronically online since i have been a child, and i don't believe in dismissing online friendships. i like having people to send memes to in discord dms and tumblr ims, i like feeling like i can talk to people. as mentioned in m a n y posts on this blog, i'm a chatty guy! this is why i mention that i won't cut a mutual if we're not writing ic, because i think talking ooc is just as important -- if not more, sometimes.

simultaneously, though, i find myself feeling anxious about being overlooked or forgotten. this is an insecurity i've had for my whole life. while i'm more confident nowadays that i am, in fact, the shit, i still don't want to feel this way in a hobby -- and i don't want any of my mutuals to feel this way, either. i think that if i cut my follower count down and shift my priorities in this way, then it'll help lessen this feeling for both parties.

i also want to stress that this is a hobby, and i do not want anyone to feel like they owe me anything ic or ooc. i work a hectic job, i have chores to do, and i might even be going back to college in january. there will always be real life obligations that are more important than writing blorbos on the internet. i will never intentionally make you feel guilty for not having the spoons to reach out to me. if you still uncomfortable with this post or this change, that is completely okay, and i encourage you to softblock ( or hardblock ) me. i want you to feel comfortable enough to have fun!

[akfamilyhome]

Hello!

I'm Akfamilyhome (or just AK), some guy in Hong Kong who likes making entertaining and informative videos on fascinating gaming topics! This place is another host for the things I make on the internet, including art, videos and edits!

You can find me in these other places as well:

YouTube: All my video productions are here, from reviews to retrospectives!

Twitter: Follow me there for more occasional updates, plus the stuff I'm also sharing on here as well!

Bluesky: The one Twitter alternative I'm currently on! I've been crossposting stuff there for a while, but there's also some occasional exclusive posts there!

Patreon: If you'd like to support what I do, I offer perks like bonus videos and Discord server access to patrons for as low as 1 USD a month!

As for here, I mentioned I'll be posting all kinds of stuff, but you can filter most of them by the following tags:

#akfamilyhome art: Artwork! Because I draw the things I want to see in the world sometimes. Additional art tags you can search on my page include 'oc art' and 'other folk's art'!

#akfamilyhome videos: Stuff related to my YouTube productions!

#akfamilyhome edits: All kinds of photo/video/audio edits, including ones I may have shared on Twitter previously!

#akfamilyhome words: Long-form text posts about various topics! If I do more of these eventually, they'll probably be exclusive to here ;)

Alright, I'll see you around!

[godbirdart]

Hi there! Short time appreciator of your stuff (I found you a few months ago + love your style sm!!) first time asker, and this might be an odd one, but do you have any suggestions for how to get involved with the furry community? Just, where to meet folk, maybe what to keep an eye out for (good or bad!) and such? I'd love to chat to folk and such but I'm just a very nervous person ^^;

You don't have to post or answer this if you don't want to! But thank you for all the cool art and the funny memes, I love seeing Sebastian with assorted snacks ^-^ you take care!!

aaA thank you!!

i'll be honest i personally skirt around the edge of the community because i too am a shy creature that emerges only every waning moon to hand people artwork

depending on the involvement level you want, you've got a number of options. a lot of people are still active on twitter, and mastodon and cohost seem to be picking up! i know mastodon has a few furry instances, such as meow.social, though I don't use mastodon that much so I cannot say if the community there is good, bad, or otherwise. same goes for cohost. last i checked it's very much so a twitter clone, but many furries i've noticed have skipped over there. pillowfort.social has a small Furry Artists community. if in doubt, there's also /r/furry on reddit.

if you just want to appreciate art and maybe comment every now and again, tumblr is pretty good. sure the tags can be a little broken sometimes, but at least you'll find the content you're looking for when you look up Furry in the search. same goes for deviantart and furaffinity, ofc depending on your interests you may have to dig around a little to get to the content / art style you specifically like. both tumblr and twitter i find are somewhat good at recommending similar artists if you follow some. sometimes there’s a recommended that pops up after you hit follow on the profile on twitter or a “blogs like these” section on tumblr, so there’s that.

telegram and discord are still popular as ever, though i feel finding a Good chat can be a herculean task. the r/furry reddit mentioned above has both telegram and discord [both sfw].

it’s super likely there’s a local / regional furry group for your area. some meet irl, even! most of these groups have telegram chats or discords if you want to meet people closer to home. of course there's also the Countless furry conventions going on too

it all depends on your social level as an individual. you can dip your toes in just by commenting on and following other furries, or opt to attend meetups and conventions and meet people in person

as for things to stay away from, the two biggest problems i want to mention are:

furry raiders. an alt-right furry group.

people with the zeta symbol “ζ“ in their bio /  name. now, the presence of a symbol isn’t always indicative of someone’s affiliation with something, so use discretion; but the zeta symbol is often used by people who are zoosadists / into be*stiality. these people are not furries, they don’t represent what the community is about, and everyone hates them. we can and will call the authorities on these people for animal abuse. if you see someone telling “zoos” to fuck off, there’s a 99.9999% chance these are the people that person is talking about.

these aren’t the only issues of course, but i feel they’re the most prominent ones. also maybe be wary of people who constantly say things like “no politics uwu” - especially if they turn it into some furry pun like “pawlitics”. maybe i personally have just had too many uncomfortable interactions with people like this and now i’m biased, but i’ve grown to never trust that.

apologies, i’m a bit of a hermit in online spaces and can’t offer anything more specific. if anyone has cooler recommendations they’re welcome to add them in the replies / reblogs!!

[bottlecaprabbitgames]

Weekly Update for 27 March, 2023

Howdy, folks! Welcome to the last update of March! Time really has flown, jesus-

Mind Games: Trepidation

Onto our favorite subject! If you guys haven't seen, there have been multiple edits pushed for mostly Chapter 1 and 2 this week! These edits have added new options to some dialogue choices, some customisation choices, and some variation to certain spots where I saw I favored sarcastic MCs over others. There have been a couple of grammar fixes pushed in Chapter 3, 4, and 5, but I have not done a more thorough editing of those chapters; after putting in some achievements, my brain kinda just. Flat-lined and needed a break, lol!

I have gotten LOADS done on Chapter 6! I am actually in Scene 3/4 for the rough draft, with about half of Scene 3's rough draft completed. Again, the rough draft is just me going through and picking one option for each branch and getting through the story so I know where it'll go when I go back to flesh it out! However, that's still a LOT of progress!!! The whole chapter is at about 5,600 words, and before doing the update I had started editing Scene 1 for a bit to start fleshing out so it's not so much work later.

A few things with MG:T:

In case you aren't aware, MG:T is only expected to be 9 Chapters, NOT including Interludes and the Epilogue. We are over 50% done with the game! VERY EXCITING!!! (Especially as I am ITCHING to get to book 2, lol!)

Chapter 6 is expected to be out in April. I will be releasing it in full as I'm expecting it to be a small to average size chapter.

I am always open to feedback and suggestions! Honestly, I would REALLY LOVE for you folks to tell me where you think improvements could be made or where you'd like to see more choices/what kind of choices you want to see more of. Be the change you want to see, lol!!

Remember: Every time an update is pushed, your saves will be corrupted! I try to push things all at once, but I never know how much I'll get done at any one time so sometimes I push smaller updates over a course of a day. If you aren't seeing anything new, it might be because your save is before the update was pushed!

I am still checking this Google Form! I am considering making one that is all about feedback and suggestions, and I DO check the one that's listed there daily! I actually have an active list of suggestions and stuff people have given me, and I do try to take the stuff you guys tell me needs fixing and put those fixes into the game!! Those of you who have answered the feedback section have been amazingly helpful and I appreciate it so much!!!

In case you missed it, I do have a page up now that has a list of all the free scenarios I've posted in the past and present, at least, the ones I could find! It also has a list of sneak peeks from Patreon I've posted! Some of them are a bit outdated as they're from, like, when I first started writing the game back in 2018-2019, but they're still enjoyable!

There is a poll up on Patreon right now that ends in 2 weeks! It's letting Patrons vote for which RO(s) will 100% be featured in April's scenarios for Patreon, and as a special treat, one of the 2 chosen ROs will be available to the lower tier as well! And, the lower tier can always vote in polls. The tier prices are $3 and $10, with $3 opening up polls, a sneak peek, discord benefits, weekly update+ content, and credits mentions (I will be putting every Patron I've had in the past in the credits of the game(s) they were supporting me during development!), with occasional monthly bonuses. The $10 tier opens up EVERYTHING I have, and everything that gets posted monthly!

I think that's all I got to tell y'all this week! See you at the next update! (Where I can hopefully confirm being done with at least one of the scenes in Chapter 6, hehe.)