#but i’m almost curious like. what pov is the author writing in

[goldensunset]

‘x the canon player character of a game’ and ‘x reader’ are different. DIFFERENT!!!

[white-weasel]

Do…. Do people actually have an issue with stuff being written in present tense?

[asimpwithfreetime]

Dilf Jake x reader right? This has been plaguing my twisted mind ever since forever, alright.

Dilf jake who is already married to neytiri {my love} And already has his four kids, but still isn't satisfied anymore, but theres a certain young na'vi who caught his attention. They obviously like jake sully {who wouldn't} but can't since he's married and is toruk macto, but Jake reassures the reader its fine with sum smut 🤭

Ohhhhh, I’m not usually into cheating smut, but hell yeah!

Sweet treat (Married! Toruk Makto! Jake Sully x younger! Fem! Reader)

Warnings: age gap, cheating, manipulation, power dynamic, inexperienced reader

{ Consume under your own media consumption and choices, not recommended for people under the age of 18. }

Author’s note: While writing this, it has gotten extremely long, so the NSFW part will be another post. I’ll make a part two only for the smut

(Yawne in na’vi means love)

[ 1st person POV ]

I felt his piercing eyes on me during the comunal dinner. I looked up to meet Toruk Makto’s eyes. I felt a shiver run down my spine. He was sitting with his family while he ate.

I was trying to keep myself focused on other things, but his eyes kept unmoving from me. I got more blushy under his constant looks.

Jake Sully had always been my imposible love. Of course, I had just reached the adult age, but I had been fantasizing with him since the moment I knew what ‘fantasizing’ meant.

His eyes pieced through me, locked into place with a smug grin on his lips. Neytiri was right beside him, but his eyes were on me. Maybe Tuk and Kiri would asking him something and he would reply with short words and a nod of his head, but his eyes came back to me.

I looked around in confusion. “Me?” I mouthed at him and he just nodded as his feline smirk got even wider. I felt a pleasurable chill run down my spine, which made my tail move around a little bit. I looked away as soon as I saw Neytiri look at Jake.

I giggled to myself as I went back to eating. Who was I to deny Toruk Makto’s desires?

I smiled sheepishly once again when I rose my gaze to eye him. His eyes again on me, he made a tiny move, looking up, as if to point with his gaze where the ikran nests were on top of our Hometree.

I got all blushy again, he was clearly asking me to meet by the ikran. That was a really risky move, but I was at that young adult age where everything seems fun instead of risky.

Just as dinner was finishing, I quickly left my group, saying I wanted to go to bed early. And before other Na’vis moved around, I was already making my way to the ikran nests. Gingerly smiling as I waited for Jake to show up.

I sat down, really understanding that Jake would have to make up fifteen different stories to get away from Neytiri and their four kids, specially with how curious and nosy his children were.

I didn’t mind waiting, it wasn’t like I had anything better to do anyways. Soon I heard rustling coming from the Hometree and I straightened my posture. There he was, Jake Sully, my admired Olo’eyktan.

I smiled shyly. I made a tiny hand gesture, bringing it to my forehead, showing him the sign of ‘I see you’.

He approached me smugly, already knowing what he would do. “You look beautiful” he spoke with a low voice, making me get a goosebump.

“Thank you…” I whispered shyly. We already knew what we were gonna do, so I didn’t expect to have any chit-chat before.

“I’ve been admiring you” he spoke as he went over to me, his hands hovering over my hips “May I?” He asked.

I nodded and smiled, quickly feeling the warmth of his big hands on my hips. “Jake…. I….” I was at a lost for words “Call me yours” he spoke softly, a gentle demand. “Ma’Jake” I quickly said, almost on command.

“I’m going to take you somewhere” he whispered in my ear, making me look at him with wide eyes. He whistled a specific note and his Ikran came flying down.

“And where are we heading to, Ma’Jake?” I whispered softly as he used his force to get me onto his ikran “Hold tight, and don’t ask, little one” he purred in my ear, hoping onto the ikran behind me and pressing me down against his chest.

The flight was quiet, Jake diving the sky with his ikran. As soon as we were away from the Hometree, one of his hands went straight to my thigh, giving it gentle squeezes. “You haven’t mated yet, have you, my sweet?” He asked with curiosity.

I shook my head, my voice shy “No, I haven’t”. He chuckled darkly behind me, leaning his head against mine. The night sky was beautiful. Once we had flown like 30 minutes into the night, on the floating mountains, he went down for us to walk. “I’ve had my eye on you for a while, Y/n” he said as he helped me down from the ikran.

“Ma’Jake” I said softly “I… I don’t know if we should do this, you are married…. We can’t even mate properly” I shyly looked at him.

He laughed again “And what’s so wrong? You’ll be my little protégé” he just smiled smugly as we walked to an edge to sit down and talk.

“And what about the age difference? And Neytiri will quickly catch onto this” I was a bit worried, now that everything seemed so much more real now.

Jake couldn’t help but chuckle. “Ma’Y/N” he shook his head “I’m the wiser one here, I’ll manage it all, just relax and let’s have fun” he tried to reassure me, but I wasn’t so sure about this all.

“Jake….” I started, but he shut me down with a soft peck to my lips “I’ve seen the way you look at me” he said smoothly. “And I can’t help but want you too”.

“If I gotta court you to get you to be with me, then so be it” he smiled as he pulled me closer to him “Jake, you can’t court me” I started, once again “Specially not in public”.

He smiled down at me “Well, you are only expressing your worries, but you ain’t saying no” he said playfully “You truly want me, don’t you?”.

I reddened at the thought, almost as if I had gotten caught red handed. It was true, I wasn’t refusing his advances but rather just wanting to ultimate the last possible problems we may face.

“See? You like me a lot, don’t you?” He gently pressed a kiss to my forehead “You are so cute, like an open book. Just an innocent little thing” he smirked.

I let out the tiniest of whines “Ooh, my little yawne is getting needy” he chuckled again.

Now feeling confident, he held my hips and brought me to sit on his lap as we looked over Pandora with a starry night above.

Avatar Taglist: @amerieee @simp-erformarvelwomen

[hivemuthur]

You’re actually wild. Like the first fic you posted on AO3 was in December and since then you have 33 fics up?? You’re insane! And most of them being Viktor/Reader?? You’re feeding Viktor Fucker Nation.

I have some questions for the ask thing! 10 and 14. And then I’m curious about stuff related to the questions 12/13 - like what your writing history is, what kinds of stuff did you write pre Arcane, did you write fanfic before, etc?

I’m curious about how you like writing /reader? I know the first couple things you posted were OCs with Joe and Renly. But OC stuff doesn’t get as much attention as /reader - is that why you switched over to that kinda stuff? Sometimes I don’t love second person POV and it took me a bit to get used to so I’m curious as to your thoughts.

You are so right, insane is what I am :v I just checked my AO3 and it says I wrote 270K words (after subtracting the doubled ones). Lol I need help I think.

Honesty being fed by requests makes it so much easier to write. I was actually very nervous at the beginning (and still am when I deviate from the subject because I get struck by a severe case of brain death in the middle), but it only helped me to formulate my thoughts better. I had no idea how much power is in prompting. And the ask game:

10. Is there a character or ship you'd love to write for, but haven't yet?

14. What makes you happiest? New fic comments, kudos, bookmarks, user subscribers, story subscribers, or Tumblr asks?

Interactions, like, beyond anything. Comments, asks, anything that people want to say to me. I was on the reading side for a long time and rarely brought myself to commenting because of some weird shame and this fear that I might be disturbing the author. Now I’m beating my chest and coming back to all those fics I loved and commenting, because finally, FINALLY I know how it feels when the void answers and I never ever want to lose this feeling and I want to give it back to the authors I love. Once, I received an art for my fic and it made me stop in the middle of the street and miss my tram, legit tears in my eyes. People saying that they’ve read something of mine and they got back to writing. I mean, it just feels so good I’m almost ok with the fact that Viktor is fictional :’)

12/13. First fandom/Do you have an 'official' creative writing background such as a degree or previous experience publishing?

Arcane is the first one I’m writing for in terms of fanfiction! And background hmm… not for the works that contain plot I would say? I write a lot for TTRPGs so I’m familiar with plot mechanics, pacing and character creations. I wrote my own tabletop game some time ago (like 2 years?). But it’s very pagan so never published it, Slavic mythology focused :v I used to write film reviews and music reviews during my uni times. But most of my writing before this was character creation for tabletop games. I also write down a lot from the books I like, I read quite a lot.

And regarding Reader/ or 2nd person POV: in the beginning I felt STUPID writing it, I have no idea why, despite the fact that I actually enjoy them as a reader myself (now I think I have no preference, I just like good stories). And because I’m a classified masochist I HAD TO TRY. So I went slow and rewrote the story from 3rd person to 2nd person POV at first. Then I wrote first Reader one-shot and now it feels natural. Same deal with present tense - completely alien at first, until I HAD TO because my sorry ass wanted coherent flashbacks. So I forced myself to learn and now I prefer it, adds to the urgency and reinforces the feeling of starvation when I’m writing sex :v

Hihi it feels so funny to know you’ve been there reading my shit from the beginning in the corners of AO3, like kicking my feet, twirling my hair funny, thank you 🖤

ask game

[daisynik7]

Bursting at the Seams

Pairing: Takashi Mitsuya x Original Female Character

Rating: Mature

Word Count: ~3.3k

cw: switching POVs (2nd and 3rd person), explicit language, kissing, established relationship (yay!)

Summary: You and Mitsuya make your newly blossomed relationship official. To commemorate this special occasion, he invites you to his house for breakfast, where you meet his mother. 

Author's Note: Thank you for your patience with this! I really love writing this story, so I’m doing my best to work on this while I continue a few other WIPs. I appreciate every single one of you who have read this so far. I’m excited to show you all how everything will play out! Would love to know what you think and maybe some predictions on what may happen in the future chapters. Thanks so much for reading!

Previous Chapter | Masterlist | Next Chapter

Saturday morning, Mitsuya wakes up with a bright smile on his face, the confession from just hours before still replaying in his head like his favorite scene in a movie. He flexes his hand, fondly remembering how hers fit so seamlessly in his. They were close to a kiss; if they hadn’t been interrupted by her parents, he’s sure it would have happened. While he wants nothing more than to feel how soft her lips are, especially pressed against his, he wonders if this is all happening a little too fast. After all, they aren’t official yet. He ought to ask her to be his girlfriend first before he smooches her, right? Isn’t that what a gentleman does?

And is Takashi Mitsuya, founding member and Second Division captain of the Tokyo Manji gang even capable of being a gentleman? Of being a good boyfriend?

He gradually comes down from his dreamy state to contemplate how best to proceed with this. After breakfast, he calls both Draken and Takemitchy, the only two people he knows that are actually succeeding in the boyfriend category. 

“You have a girlfriend now?!” Takemitchy exclaims loudly on the other end. Hina’s in the background, begging him to put it on speaker so she can listen in too. 

“No, not yet. I confessed to her last night and she likes me back.” He smiles to himself, recalling the moment once again. 

“Holy shit, you actually took my advice,” Draken chuckles. “Good shit, man. So did you two kiss yet or…?”

“Well, we almost did,” he explains. “Her parents came out right as we were about to. But it got me thinking that maybe we should make it official first before we do anything irresponsible.”

Draken barks out a laugh. “You know that you can’t get a girl pregnant just from kissing her, right?”

Before Mitsuya can cuss him out, Takemitchy comments, “No, I totally understand where you’re coming from! When Hina and I started dating, we barely held hands. It took even longer for us to kiss! Waiting for the right time just made it all the more special.” 

“Hina, stop holding the gun to his head, we know you’re in the room with us,” Draken teases.

There’s shuffling on their end as she grabs hold of the phone, giggling, “I didn’t even have to tell him to say that! Anyways Mitsuya, I think taking things slow is a wonderful idea!”

“Nah, screw that. You’re a man now, Takashi. And men have needs. As long as she wants it too, I say just go for it.”

“Go for what exactly?” Mitsuya asks, genuinely curious.

“Dude, do I really have to spell it out for you?”

“Please don’t,” Takemitchy murmurs.

“Nothing gross!” Hina chimes in.

“I’m talking about fu – ”

“Ken Ryuguji!” Emma’s voice rings from the line. “Do not say what I think you’re about to say! Not in front of our child!”

“It can’t even hear yet!” 

Clearly now, Emma insists, “Mitsuya, whatever you do, do not listen to Draken. Go with your heart instead of your…well, you know.”

“Says the woman who is currently pregnant because of you-know-what,” Draken mutters.

“This is totally different. We’ve been together for years. Mitsuya’s only known this girl for a month. And unlike you, Ken Ryuguji, Takashi is actually a sweet guy.”

“Hey!”

She ignores him, adding, “You’ve got all the time in the world. Do what you think is right. Everything will work out in the end.”

He thanks all four of them for their input before ending the call, heeding their advice carefully the remainder of the day as he babysits his sisters at home. It’s probably best for him and Hana to discuss what their expectations are going forward. He has no experience in relationships whatsoever, so naturally, he’s apprehensive. He wouldn’t be able to forgive himself if he somehow becomes a rotten boyfriend. 

Around dinnertime, he decides to text her, asking if she is free to talk on the phone later tonight, to which she confirms that she is. He takes the next few hours to prepare himself, rehearsing what he’d like to say over and over in his head until he tucks his sisters into bed, retreating into his own bedroom to dial Shimizu’s number. 

After two rings, she picks up. “Hello?”

He smiles, happy to hear her voice. “Hi. How are you?”

“Good. And you?”

“Good. Great, actually. I hope I’m not bothering you.”

“You’re not. I’m happy you called.”

They exchange pleasantries, recounting each other’s nights before getting to the main matter. His heart skips a beat, getting increasingly nervous, despite how comforting it is to hear her speak so casually with him. When the right opportunity arrives, he clears his throat, remembering what he practiced from earlier. “I just want to make sure that we do this right, you know? I’ve never had a girlfriend, so I really don’t know what to do when it comes to things like this. But I want to do my best to be a good boyfriend to you.”

Her voice is gentle and sweet as she replies, “I feel the same way. I’ve never had a boyfriend either. I don’t know how good of a girlfriend I can be. But I’ll do my best too to be good to you. We’ll learn together. ” 

He grins, touched by her words. “Together. I like that.” He swallows his emotions to continue. “I’m sure your parents won’t approve of you dating a gang member. But you’ll always be safe with me. You have nothing to worry about when it comes to Toman. I can promise you that.” 

“It doesn’t matter to me that you’re in Toman. I already feel safe with you, so I’m not concerned about that at all.”

Surprised, he says, “Really?”

“Really,” she confirms with confidence. “I want you to feel safe with me too. I’ll do everything I can to protect you. I mean, I can’t fight. But I promise that I’ll be there for you whenever you need someone to lean on, someone to support you. I want to help you however I can.”

Tears begin to well in his eyes, his heart on the verge of bursting from his chest. He’s never felt anything like this before. He’s always taken pride in protecting the people dearest to him, whether it be his family or his fellow brothers in the gang. And while he knows that his friends will always have his back, knowing that someone outside of Toman is looking out for him, determined to protect him, feels different. Is it okay for Mitsuya to rely on her like this? To be vulnerable and depend on her throughout all the obstacles that come his way? Draken’s words from last night replay in his head. You deserve to be happy. You’re always the one taking care of others, it’s about time someone takes care of you. The more he thinks about it, he realizes that yes, maybe he does deserve this. 

He grabs a tissue from his nightstand, wiping away his sniffles. “You’ve already helped me so much. I don’t know if this makes sense, but when I’m with you, I feel normal. I feel like myself, you know? Like I’m more than just this Toman jacket. I’m just me. A lot of our classmates are too scared to talk to me, and when they do, it’s usually for a favor because of my reputation. But you approached me, wanting sewing lessons. I feel like you see the real me more than anyone else does.”

It takes a several seconds for her to respond, seemingly holding back tears. Eventually, she says, “I’m really glad I came to you for lessons then.”

“Me too.”

There’s a comfortable silence between them as they cherish each other’s heartfelt sentiments, Mitsuya stares at his bedroom ceiling with the phone pressed to his hear, wishing he could see her right now. “So, Hana Shimizu.”

She giggles. “Yes, Takashi Mitsuya?”

“Would you please do me the honor and be my girlfriend?”

There’s more of her precious laughter as she answers, “Yes. And will you do me the honor and be my boyfriend?”

“Absolutely yes,” he replies, smiling even wider. He’s tempted to get out of bed and drive to her house to commemorate this special occasion, but he resists. Instead, he blurts out, “Do you want to come over for breakfast tomorrow? I really want to see you before school on Monday. I can make pancakes. Plus, my mom has a late shift and she’ll be home, so you can meet her.”

“Isn’t this too soon to be meeting your mother?” 

“Is it? Are there rules against it or something?”

She laughs. “I guess not. We can make up our own rules. As long as we’re learning together, right?”

“You know I like the sound of that. I’ll see you tomorrow, then?”

“Yes, tomorrow. Goodnight, Takashi.”

His breath hitches, enjoying the sound of his name from her mouth a little too much. Chest fluttering with affection, he says quietly, “Goodnight, Hana.”

~~~

Within twenty-four hours of his confession, you are officially Takashi Mitsuya’s girlfriend. 

You stare wide-eyed at the ceiling of your bedroom in disbelief, the phone still warm in your grasp having just finished your conversation with your now boyfriend. You’re tingling all over, utterly amazed and completely ecstatic at this recent turn of events. Who would have thought you, plain and ordinary Hana Shimizu, would be anyone’s girlfriend, let alone Takashi Mitsuya’s girlfriend? 

It takes you a while to fall asleep, mind racing with thoughts and fantasies of your new relationship. You wake up the next morning, both nervous and excited to see him. Knowing that you’ll be meeting his mom today, you put on your best dress, hoping to make a good impression. You quietly step down the stairs, barely sticking your head into the kitchen to greet your parents. “Morning! I’m going out for breakfast!” 

Before you can sneak away, your mother calls out to you. “With who? Mei and Keiko?”

You contemplate lying, but you know that never pans out well. So, praying they don’t question it, you answer, “I’m going to the Mitsuyas.” You listen for any reaction, and when you only hear hushed whispers between your parents, you slip into your shoes, heading out the door. 

It’s a short trip to his house, less than ten minutes. You knock on the front door, taking a deep breath. He answers quickly, a smile already on his face, eyes full of kindness as he greets you. “Hana, good morning.” Your name sounds so soothing from his mouth; you never thought your name was special but hearing it from him makes it feel that way. “Hi, Takashi.”

He rubs the nape of his neck, a slight blush on his cheeks. “I’m not used to hearing you say my first name yet.”

“Do you want me to stop?”

“No, not at all. I just…I think I like it a little too much,” he admits. 

You reach for his hand, brushing your fingers gently along his knuckles. When Luna and Mana come running towards the entrance, you immediately retract from him, embarrassed. “Ms. Hana!” they cheer, hugging you tightly around the waist. 

You pat their heads. “Hi! I missed you two!”

They peer up at you, beaming. “We missed you so much!” 

“What did Taka do to you, huh? Should we beat him up?” Luna offers, shooting a glare at her brother.

“No, no, no! He didn’t do anything wrong, I promise,” you assure them. 

Takashi snorts, playfully rolling his eyes. “Like you even stand a chance.”

“We know exactly where to hit you, Taka!” Luna threatens. 

Mana chimes in. “Yeah, you taught us, remember?!”

You grin at him, brow raised. “What are you teaching them?”

“Self-defense, of course,” he replies, smirking. “In case some idiots try to mess with them.”

A woman with the same downturned lavender eyes appears from the kitchen, a warm smile on her face. The resemblance is uncanny; this is definitely Takashi’s mother. She’s as beautiful as you imagined her to be and you’re immediately flustered under her gaze. You bow to her, the kiddos still latched to your legs. “Good morning, Ms. Mitsuya. Thank you for having me.”

“Of course. You’re welcome anytime. I’ve heard so much about your from my children, so I’m so happy I finally get to meet you. The food is ready, so if you’d like, we can start eating.”

The five of you gather around the table, Takashi taking the seat beside you, his knee touching yours as you sit cross-legged on the cushion. The spread is fantastic: fluffy pancakes stacked neatly one-by-one, pillowy golden tamago topped with strips of seaweed, bowls of strawberries and other fruit to top it all off. Luna and Mana help themselves to a pile of pancakes, drizzling a generous amount of syrup before they take a big bite. Takashi serves you, giving you a little bit of everything to try. His mother watches the two of you, a small grin on her face. 

You chat casually, Ms. Mitsuya asking the typically questions: how’s school, what your family does for work, what you plan to study in university. “I’m going to major in education. I want to become a teacher,” you inform her.

“So you will follow in your father’s footsteps. How wonderful,” she comments. “Mitsuya, maybe you should consider doing that, too.”

You face him, nodding. “You’d be a great teacher!” 

He shrugs, stuffing a forkful of eggs into his mouth. “I think I’d rather keep my major to business. If I ever become a designer, I might want to open my own shop, you know?”

His mom leans forward, a serious expression on her face now. “Do you think you’ll really follow through with it, Takashi? I know how committed you are to Toman, but maybe it’s time to move on from it. I don’t want you to put your dreams on the backburner for this little gang of yours.”

“Why can’t I do both? I’m not just going to abandon my friends, Mom. And I’m not going to abandon my dreams, either. I can do them both,” He avoids her gaze, staring down at his almost empty plate of food. You rest your hand on his knee, squeezing it, wanting to show your support for him. If he’s confident that he can balance both obligations at the same time, then you believe in him too. 

He smiles at you, entwining his fingers with yours. “I have another announcement to make. Hana and I are dating.” Much to your shock, he holds your hands up, showcasing this display of affection. 

Luna and Mana squeal, applauding enthusiastically. “Yay!”

You anticipate his mother’s reaction and breathe a sigh of relief when you notice her serious demeanor relax, a grin spreading across her face at the news. “Congratulations. I’m very happy to hear that.”

He grips you tighter, looking at her. “Mom, I know you think I have a lot to deal with, but I can do this. When have I ever let you down?”

She shakes her head. “You never have.”

“So, do I have your support? Do we have your support?”

She smiles. “Of course. You always have, and you always will.”

While the abrupt announcement has you shaken at first, you can’t help being elated at how well this is already going. With his mother’s approval, this only leaves your parents to consult with next, which might prove a bit more difficult than this. However, with Takashi by your side, you’re confident you can convince them to trust in this new relationship of yours. Especially with all the wonderful merits your boyfriend brings to the table. 

After breakfast, you play with this sisters in the living room while mother and son wash the dishes in the kitchen. When Takashi excuses himself to use the bathroom, you take this chance to speak to her in private, if only for a brief moment. Standing next to her at the sink, a clean dish towel in hand, you offer to dry the dishes, which she gladly accepts. “Ms. Mitsuya. I just want to thank you for welcoming me into your home.”

“Like I said, you’re always welcome here.” She glances at the hallway, checking on Takashi, who remains in the bathroom. In a lower, hushed tone, she adds, “I just hope that you can push Takashi in the right direction.”

Confused, you ask, “What do you mean?”

She sighs, scrubbing the last bowl with the sponge. “I don’t want him to be in Toman for the rest of his life. I’m not sure if you know this, but back in middle school, he got into this really big fight. He was beaten to nearly an inch of his life, all for the sake of his friend, Hakkai. I’m scared that if this continues any further, there will be a time he’ll put his life on the line and won’t be able to get back on his feet. You seem to have a good head on your shoulders, so maybe you can steer him to where he needs to go.”

It’s never crossed your mind what hardships Takashi has had to overcome in his past. Sure, there are rumors and idle gossip about him floating amongst your classmates, but you never paid it any mind, wanting to get to know him for yourself. Hearing this from his own mother is concerning, and with her subtle plea for you to guide him away from Toman, you’re not sure if you’re qualified to do that. It doesn’t seem like your place to interfere with his life. All you can do is support in whatever decisions he makes, right?

Your boyfriend returns before you can respond to her, standing beside you to help dry the remaining dishes. Ms. Mitsuya slides her gloves off, wiping her hands on a paper towel. “I need to run to the store to get a few groceries. I’ll take the girls with me so they can pick out some snacks. Will you be okay here, Taka?”

“Yeah, I’ll be fine.”

“Hana, it was so nice to finally meet you. I’ll see you again soon, okay?” She wraps her arms around you in a snug embrace. 

“Yes, thank you for breakfast, Ms. Mitsuya,” you say, squeezing her back. You hug Luna and Mana goodbye before they leave hand-and-hand with their mother, leaving you and Takashi alone.

You turn to face him, stepping closer. “I guess I should head home soon.”

He closes the distance even further, leaning towards you, his hands in his pockets, a smirk on his face. “Yeah, maybe that’s for the best.”

You grin at him, wrapping your arms around his neck. “Thank you for inviting me. This was really fun.”

He slides his hands around your waist, pulling you closer, nuzzling his nose to yours. “It was. Thank you for coming.”

Your lips meet in a delicate kiss, sweet and soft just as you imagined it’d be. Warmth fills your chest and you’re almost breathless when you part, his forehead pressed to yours, smiling. “Do you really have to go?”

You giggle, giving him a peck on the cheek before you pull away. “I think I should.”  

He watches you from the doorway as you make your way outside, twirling in your dress once more to wave goodbye. You stroll through the neighborhood in a daze, lips tingling, body buzzing with excitement, taking your time to get home. 

Ms. Mitsuya’s request still lingers in your mind as you enter your house, humming a happy tune with your mom and dad eyeing you suspiciously. Then, there’s your parents, of course, who you’ll need to talk to soon. There may be obstacles to face, but you’re confident that you and Takashi can persevere, together. All that matters in this moment is that the two of you are happy. And there is nothing standing in your way to stop that. 

[imagineitdearies]

Hello! Just finished PS. I cannot praise you enough. Its easily the best thing ive read this year, and my resolution was to read multiple books a month. You surpass ALL OF THEM!

Saw ur authors note at the end abt an original queer vamp novel- is there anymore info yet? Im sure you've got ppl begging already but id truly love to beta when the time comes- or be first in line to preorder.

I feel like i read this at exactly the right time of my life.

The story was so painful yet rewarding bc i see so much of myself in Tyrus. Astarion and Tyrus truly feel like two different exstensions of my healing self. I wont go into it, but im a survivor to. Like tyrus, it happened when i was a young. Seeing his transformation throughout his decade of enslavement, his hatred towards himslef and the world, all bc of one man hit home. I kept telling myself that if it didnt have a happy ending id have to burn my phone or smthn lol. Seeing Astarion amd Tyrus not just defeat Cazador, but do it together, do it solely through their love of one another, broke me. The power of love, hope, and goodness. I havent cried over a fanfic since middle school. Im in my 20s now. I adored the final 2 chapters of the aftermath- im so grateful we got to meet his sister! And with Halsin, no less!

Im so thrilled you'll be adding oneshots and other stories to the universe. Tyrus is so real, so alive, id hate to see him contained in one story.

I love how Tyrus, ultimately, changeed. He didnt change into a monster like he feared, but what happened to him did changed him. Thats not a bad thing, tho. He's still Tyrus, simply a new version. And im still me, simply a new version.

I dont know if ill ever be able to reread, even skimming over the rougher parts was hard, but im so grateful i was able to see Tyrus and Astarion's journey. All of their triumphs felt like mine, all of their failures. Their never wavering love and trust in one another, that they understood it was Cazador that made them do those bad things. Ur right, pain and love must be intertwined, which is why this fic was so amazing. The highs would have never felt so spectaular without the lowest of lows.

Im rambling, i apologize. I do hope you read this, even if you dont respond. I hope my thanks and praise can give u something in return for what you've given me.

If you've made it this far, have you made any content on ur process? Ur planning? The flow was amazing, ur description, the flashbacks- did you go to school for writing? As a writer myself im almsot jealous at ur talent- but mostly curious :) id love to know anything you're willing to share.

Again, thank you. This was a gift, you know. I wont forget it.

Hi turtleurtle!! Great to see you over here, thank you so much for your kind words 🩵🩵 it means a lot any time I hear people enjoyed PS as much/more than published fiction!!

Speaking of, yes, since you ask I do have a little more to say now on my original story. I took a small writing break for a week or so but have now jumped back into the saddle for the next adventure! Lots of plotting, character creation, worldbuilding, and research happening right now.

Reuben, our first main POV, is almost fully fleshed out as a character and I’m so excited for you all to meet him (he’s an eloquence bard, for starters)!! The first book/part is almost fully outlined and I’ve written the first few pages. I’m really starting to get inspired by where the storyline is going.

Back to PS though—I’m so glad you felt seen with Tyrus’s character. He did inevitably change, but by the end he is (mostly) at peace with that and can still forge a good life and happy relationships. Meeting Cynda again was that last little piece of hope he needed to believe it 🥹

Haha the light does always seem brighter when you’re stuck in pitch darkness! On the other hand, it’s something Tyrus only thinks once, but I would argue love is not intertwined with pain more than anything else. Pain is just an inevitability. No matter what you do, you will experience discomfort, sorrow, loss, physical suffering (see Cazador, with absolutely zero love in his life). While love is not inevitable, it’s a choice. Love is a gift we choose to give and to receive in the midst of inevitable suffering and that is why it is so precious. Having that perspective has really helped me heal and have more hope for the future 🩵

Haha never apologize for rambling about PS! This thing has consumed my soul for the last 8 months so I love the chance to hear from/converse with people especially now that the full story is posted and all is revealed. Honestly wish I could sit down with you all and just discuss everything!! But seriously thank you for this message.

As for my writing, here’s a few writing advice asks I've answered, but i haven’t gotten too in-depth on my chaotic process yet. I will say long walks talking to myself, bullet lists, and brackets are my personal recipe for success (besides just writing for years and years) 😂 I did take a lot of classes in school too! If people have specific questions, I’m happy to give my best go at an answer.

Thanks so much 🥰

[cerberusmahou]

We get just as much from Katara’s POV about Aang than we also do with her about Jet, if not more. In both ATLA and NATLA, Jet straight up manipulates Katara, and in NATLA it’s worse because he tells her that she only has the power that she does because of him. Whereas in ATLA and NATLA Aang is Katara’s number one supporter when it comes to almost everything (Kiawentiio herself said that he played a huge part in her bending growth and that they are both physically and spiritually bonded). So I’m confused as to why you think Jetara gives Katara agency, but Kataang doesn’t.

Let me start by clarifying that english isn't my language and I'm aware I can come out as aggressive. I apologize beforehand if my reply reads that way. However, I prefer being clear and assertive over being too polite and confusing.

I don't want to be part of ship wars either, so I won't reply to other questions like this if asked again, but I think it may be worth explaining once to avoid future confusion.

With this said, let me reply to your question.

I have never stated anything like that, so don't put words in my mouth I never said.

I am a Kataang. They're one of my favourite ATLA ships. If they weren't I wouldn't have drawn them because I value my time.

What I said is that while I love them I also wish the writers put more emphasis in Katara's perspective precisely because they're the canon choice. You can love something and, at the same time, be critical of it. I'm also critical of Jet's writing.

I don't think Jet gives Katara more agency than Aang does and I don't think Jetara is a healthier ship than Kataang either. You don't know why I like them. Ask me if you're curious, but stop assuming.

Aang is one of my favourite characters. He is kind, sweet, empathetic, funny and loves Katara genuinely. He is an incredibly good friend to Katara and one of the people who supports her goals and dreams the most. He wants good things for her and that's why I think they're cute together and good for each other.

However, as romance, their canon writing is objectively flawed. Both in the series and the comics, as their romance is writen from Aang's perspective. Katara is Aang's dream girl and the series frames her love as a reward. In fact, all the guys get a girl as a reward for their actions.

That's not a problem in fanfiction or idealized romance books, I enjoy that as well, but I have my beef with this happening in a series for children. Especially one where there is so much emphasis on growth and morals. It sets unrealistic and harmful expectations for all genders.

So, yes, I wish we had more scenes of Katara talking about her problems to him, I wish Katara had more agency with Aang, and I wish there were more scenes like the Fire Nation dance where you can see her crush develop - because we get all of this from Aang's side, but not so much from Katara's. That's not criticism against Aang, and that's not hating on Kataang, it's criticism against the author's writing choice. My complaints are level-entry feminism and I think we, as Kataang fans, should acknowledge its flaws along its strenghts.

That said, I also think ATLA is a product of its time. And one that aged very well. Back then, that's how most couples were written, as a male dream. This is a flaw, but a strength is that Katara's writing was more than revolutionary, especially considering she's the love interest.

All these facts can coexist and be true.

I get your frustration because I love Aang as well and I know about the anti-Kataang thing, but I'm afraid you're aiming at the wrong target.

I like Jet as a character and I like Jetara for other reasons, I don't ship them because i think he's a better suitor for Katara. I don't ship with that mindset. I have said this before, but I tend to focus on drawing what I can't find and wish to see - and there is a lot of Kataang for me to enjoy passively.

Aang, Katara, and Jet are fictional characters. Anyone can write them with anyone and enjoy exploring different scenarios.

Hope I explained myself properly. If you have any other questions I'll be happy to have a friendly chat.

[m1ckeyb3rry]

HI MIRAAA ALSO OMG DW ABT IT I HOPE YOUR MIGRAINES ARE GONE THOUGH???? FEEL BETTERRR I’m pretty sure you mentioned having migraines like a few weeks ago too or something manifesting that they leave you alone for good soon!!! But chronically online time WAHOO!!

Big sigh but I DID SEE THAT OMG your manifestation skills are actually out of this world wtf down to the name kaito and the ct hello WHAT

FRRRR like what are you doing to my boy chigiri…actually you know what’s funny to think about imagine all the merch illustrations are like a model/actor au where they’re going to photoshoots dressing up and taking pics to make into merch they hand chigiri his fit in his dressing room and he’s like wtf is this REAL I imagine chigiri turning on his heels like “why did I even ask”

that’s so funny because the reason I don’t like Tyler is also because I associate with a Tyler I knew but he was definitely not uhhhh eye candy���more like he was one of THOSE league players and giving off “um akshually” vibes but I’m crying well manifesting for your friend LMAO the mere concept of an American au just has me sending the redneck concept is even wilder LMAOOO also LMAOAAO PLEASE I JUST COULDNT THINK OF A BETTER WORD HAHAHAH the whole whiteboard planning would so be them though

REALLLL LMAOOO I almost think it’s kinda like the reo zantetsu dynamic in team z actually wait it’s lowk the exact same vibes except i would still give reader some brains yk but FRRR like that’s exactly what im saying why would comment that like it’s something the author is going to go edit and cater to like hello what reading wild comments is lowkey entertaining like just seeing the insane things people say like you really took the time to comment that out huh um but anyways

LMAOO Tullia the goat fr and oaeu forever remains a masterpiece Oliver getting his redemption arc at the very end will be so fun to read

The sae agenda makes me rip my hair out like damn ok but REAL I love reading your banter in general because it also just really fits the type of banter I’d use irl too (the fwtkac banter is one of my all time favs when reader is like “good maybe your ego will shrink it’s almost the same size as your hair” SOOO FUNNY LMFAOOOO) but also real I feel like we circle to this concept a lot because you get a lot of sequel requests like it’s fine where it ended because there’s not much more of a story to write about besides typical couple activities

I’m crying how does one even come up with that idea like genuinely curious but hey if you see it you see it but go off LMAOAOA I SAW TOO!!! Karasu reverse bfb is so funny I see chigiris sister and Karasu ever now and then on tiktok and some of the meme edits are hilarious

YAY yeah I wasn’t sure if you were gonna throw in Karasu (actually ngl maybe don’t or else I’ll swerve when I read) but I would love a visualization for what Pegasus he’d have…ONE PART very classic Mira activity ok yeah I think 15k might be more accurate then…but OOOOOOH NAGI AIKU AU!!! Wait I’m actually so excited to read that because we theorize and talk about just universe ideas so much too reading it in story form would be really interesting

Sigh x5 KAISER I know you’ll cook with the prompt though!!

LMAOAOAO FR wait if that ever happens I’ll make an email address like that I’m crying it’s too funny and YES we’re staying safe LMAO

LAKSAO the way we’ve both seen that floating around has me laughing I’m glad you know what I mean though (synced up fr) I mean tbf it’s a very niche combo so I guess there’d probably be only one of that in existence though but yeah I scrolled by and was like wait what but you’re actually cooking with that switch up YUKI KARASU BEEF CONTINUES LMAOOOO but anyways oooh true I’m ngl I think my only exposure to love triangles is like…kdramas….maybe tiktok to the rescue LOL lmk if you ever want a brainstorm session though we could try ransacking our brains…

LMAO with your track record watch your nagi monologue/pov just be full on canon nagi pov waittt the score one goal thing defend the rest is actually so good it works perfectly with the set up of the u20 esp with Aiku and the rest of the iron wall of defenders they have but STREAK BROKEN YAY!! CONGRATS!! But preparing myself to read from what you’ve given me I’m very excited

FRRRR that’s also what I’m saying like I see the scenes at first and I’m like LMAO this is so exaggerated it’s funny and it’s like..clearly just done as a joke but people take it as hard canon fact and run and I’m like I’m pretty certain this is also just humor/borderline satire….but whatever…..

TRUE yeah I can imagine there’s a much larger concentration of quality works for AoT which is also why the bllk tags generally have less traction too but yeah never willingly read sae stuff LOL

REAL I was also gonna say like nagi is popular enough but all of his edits are usually just his scenes from the episode with some music slapped over it hello this lowk makes me want to stalk that Kaiser editors account to see if they did anyone else

LMAOO yeah sorry yuki ok I know we talk about his beef in the miraverse in a funny way but it actually just brings me back to the rough and tumble concept and also generally (esp after the ln) the concept of him always having some obstacle in the way of his goals or like that concept of hard work not paying off yk? This was such a bad articulation of it LMAO but I feel like it’s such an interesting dynamic with him of being talented and also hardworking yet he’s always one step away and the frustration that comes with it anyways I hope you get what I’m putting down I don’t even know how to fully describe how it makes me feel I just think it’s interesting and kinda suits him?? I’m gonna stop here because the more I try to explain the worse it gets

Wait I almost forgot imagine Shidou LN next some of his profile info does make me wonder wtf happened in his childhood though like most likely some traumatic event because what

CRYING LMAOO idk if that’s good or bad lowk…that friend experience was insane though talk about plot development

LMAO THATS ACTUAKLY SO SCARY THOUGH I recently sent a friend something and I got the notice that they viewed it and I was like oh…..like idk and my friend didn’t care obv but seeing the mechanic in the flesh was uh…hm…

SO TRUE it’s just pinned to the PxG dorm fridge or planning board

Also yeah I’m realizing that too a lot of the screenshots and posts of the panels I see are from the fan translations and they’re wildly different from the official ones

THAT WAS SO FUNNY LMFOAOAAOAOAOAOAO KARASU ADDITIONAL TIME IM GLAD THEYRE GIVING HIM MORE MOMENTS Bachira having that dream is so funny though like thank you for dreaming that goofy ass Karasu with a beard FR this is the type of additional time content I want I do NOT care about reo tweaking out over nagi cmon

Also omg GENSHIN wait if you actually pick it up will gladly discuss I used to play pretty often but ran out of storage (sigh my devices….) so I haven’t touched it in a bit but I’m still pretty up to date with the current story and characters!!

Ok and THEME CHANGE!!!!! The red and white plus Nagi’s aura >>>>>>>>

- Karasu anon

unfortunately my migraines are as chronic as my online habits DKFHDJ i will probably never escape them…they run on my mother’s side of the family but like only the girls get them?? which is so 😒 but it’s okay i’m mostly good at managing them!! the last bout was kinda just worse than usually but hopefully they calm down for the next round…anyways another late reply because i’ve been grinding on this one shot trying to get it over and done with and i FINALLY did!! going to respond to you + go to dinner and then come back proofread and post 🤩

NO BECAUSE WHEN I SAW THOSE I AUDIBLY GASPED like at this point the multi fandom manifestations are insanely specific now it’s like every mangaka ever just decided to use me as their inspo or smth /j like i don’t think kaito is that common of a name either?? which makes it doubly wild i think i must be a prophet or something

PLEASEEE imagine chigiri just keeps getting typecasted as the gay best friend or whatever in movies so he has to beg for roles that let him show his range (aka he wants to be batman) and then he FINALLY gets to be the flash but then the costume looks ugly with his hair so he either has to dye it or pick a diff role 😭

HELP i also have an opp named tyler and i know for a fact he plays forza which is like on the same level as league to me KDJDJD so we can commiserate on the tyler hating but i’ve known the other tyler for longer so he’s still my default tyler image (??) LMAOOO THE CONCEPT OF AN AMERICAN AU IS SO FUNNY TO ME TOO ngl most modern au fics lowkey end up being lowkey american aus because people don’t really take the time to look at what life in college or high school or whatever in the characters’ country of origin (like japan) would actually be like and just draw on irl experiences?? I’M GUILTY OF IT TOO IN LESS SERIOUS STORIES FKDHDBS like in otoya’s bfb they have the super long american summer break which they don’t really get in japan…in karasu’s bfb though i did make sure to get the dates and stuff more accurate ☝🏻 anyways wait this actually reminds me that peregrine has an entire america ARC FJFJDJ i’m such a patriot as you can tell

REO AND ZANTETSU DYNAMIC MY BELOVED that would actually be so funny actually wait not to swerve (mira swerving AWAY from nagi…historical moment right here) but ykw would also be fun is if you have something like reader and reo’s relationship in peregrine and have the two of them switch lives FKFJDJ like first of all just imagining peregrine reader’s snobby ass in reo’s body is a trip but also dare i say they would actually benefit from it even more than freaky friday karasu and reader did…like reader sees the pressure reo’s under and how he’s actually a sweet genuine guy who’s not stuck up and fake + reo seeing that reader’s parents genuinely suck and why she’s genuinely averse to being friends with him…

LOWKEY I DO ENJOY THE WILD COMMENTS SOMETIMES they also occasionally annoy me but it really depends on the nature of the comment 🤔 most of the time it’s one of those things where i’m like “wtf” in the moment but then talking about them afterwards i always end up laughing

TULLIA MY GOAT 🥹 she’s based on my best friend in real life so she’s always going to be special to me HAHA but also speaking of aiku i am feeling SO fond of him rn omg like that one shot i just finished has made me an aiku stan i think…still not really fully romantically but he is so cute in a “he’s my best friend” way

THE SAE AGENDA IS SOOO STRONG LMAOAOA but yeah i love writing banter so much!! the fwtkac banter especially in the first part before they’re together/have the fight about yukimiya is so peak like they’re just so sassy and silly with one another…and yeah i get a lot of sequel requests and i’m always like 😔 because I DON’T KNOWWWW WHAT TO WRITE and literally the one time i was like “i can write a sequel if you guys want 🙂‍↕️” with the kiyora fic nobody asked for one 😭 it’s okay though actually the only reason i would ever write a seabird sequel would be so that i could write the days leading up to their wedding SOLELY so sae can mention to reader “yeah rin’s gone to america to meet this girl who stayed with us when he was 19” and reader’s like “oh it’s so sweet that they stayed in touch and planned that!!” because she thinks rin is like sae and actually bagged cherry tree reader before she left japan but then sae’s like “LMAO They Didn’t 🤣” and reader’s just like “hello??” and sae’s like “yeah idk man he’s kind of a freak” and reader’s like “oh word” and they just move on

LMAOO to be fair people must think that about most of my ideas so hey if that’s what they think is fun then more power to them!! and YEAH the karasu + chigiri’s sister memes are always hilarious i bet chigiri would fr crash out if he had to have karasu as a brother in law though 😭😭😭

KDJDJS NO LITERALLY i was like “no i can’t put karasu in here i’ll crumble” ngl reo originally had a bigger role and rin was also super important in the story but then i began to swerve to RIN which is crazy but anyways so then reo’s role was lessened and rin was cut completely and replaced with a blend of ego, anri, and probably bachira

YESS NAGI AIKU AU wait you mentioned it again in a diff paragraph but i’m going to talk about it here for continuity’s sake and whatnot anyways um so remember how i was like “i’m going to keep this short so it doesn’t end up being 30k words and i can expand on it later” well…i did my best to keep it short and cut some of the things i was planning on including. and ykw?? IT’S STILL ALMOST 22K WORDS 😭😭😭😭😭😭 i had sooo much fun writing it!! i’m really excited for you and the five other people interested in it to read FSJJS trying to do nagi’s pov was def really tough but eh i came up with smth 🤔 now is ANYBODY in character?? probably not. did i have to absolutely glaze shidou and aiku at various points in the story?? 100%. BUT it was really cool to write from a canon character’s pov and in such a canon-adjacent au so i’m still proud of what i ended up coming up with (if that makes sense) anyways like i said i’m going out for a dinner so it’ll probably be a couple of hours before i post it but once i do i can’t wait to hear your thoughts on it :3

love triangles are sooo common in ya novels and also in manhwas and they’re annoying every time because you really have to do them well so it’s def a challenge 😭 but i will figure it out trust and yes worst comes to worse there’s always tik tok audios to inspire me…no but literally karasu and kunigami is super niche i feel like indie having them as a duo 😭 not to mention yukimiya and hiori people are going to think i just have an obsession with rare pairs (which tbf i do like them more than normal pairs but that’s a separate thing)

yeah i’ve always thought additional times and like adjacent things to that in other animes are meant to poke fun at characters by overly exaggerating them?? not give additional characterization to them if that makes sense LMAOAOA oh well the humor will remain as such for us two at least 😭🙏🏻

yup just because of aot being sm older and more popular there is SO much stuff for it KFJDDJN i always say there are a lot of crazy fans but the fans that lock in truly LOCK IN because some of those fanarts and edits deserve to be in museums i’ve literally never been in a fandom that does fan work the way the aot fandom does

people don’t put their SOULS into editing nagi i think part of it is that he has the largest quantity of hype animated scenes (followed by rin) so it’s really easy to throw a bunch of clips together whereas less popular characters require more effort to edit…and then rin is just so many people’s favs that there’s always someone around to put out smth astounding for him

no yeah i get you exactly like the way he does everything and tries his hardest but he always ends up one step short?? it’s kind of like reverse karasu if you think abt it where karasu kinda thinks he’s mid but he’s usually able to pull through in the end whereas yuki believes and tries so much but he can’t quite get it 🤔 NOT THE ONE SIDED BEEF BECOMING TWO SIDED okay wait actually speaking of rough and tumble yukimiya he definitely wouldn’t get along with karasu i think he would find him kinda pretentious or smth idk i see him being a) comfortable?? ish?? with shidou in the sense that shidou probably reminds him of the people he grew up alongside so he’s very familiar which in turn is kind of a source of comfort and b) getting along with like kiyora who’s also very blunt and honest (another potential bastard munchen team up??)

the only reason i think it won’t be shidou is because i think his backstory is going to be something that they will make a main event in the manga?? so they’ll wait to release his ln until after that happens…i could see a sae + shidou + aiku ln release in the future once we know more about sae and shidou from the manga

no literally it was the most insane friendship ever KDFJSJN i’m just glad it’s over now 😭 and yeah even if you have it turned off you still get the notifications from other people when they view videos you sent them which is truly…interesting…

yeah it’s def a product of how popular leaks and stuff are nowadays the fan translations become popular when the officials are completely different sometimes even to the point that the lines mean smth completely different??

THIS WAS PROBABLY MY FAV ADDITIONAL TIME YET LMAOAOA professor karasu is actually my number one gilf now #speakingmytruth he’s still fine SORRY NOT SORRY!! also otoya in a suit was kinda serving cunt um anyways AND THE RANDOM LIFE LESSON KARASU GAVE REO?? that was somehow so fwtkac part three karasu / oaeu aiku of him 😭 bachira truly a blessing for his crazy dreams this is the content we as a fandom needed

YUP i saw an image of alhaitham and i was like wait who is this fine man…which are we even surprised 😭 like he’s supposedly tall smart nonchalant and has fluffy light hair he’s actually exactly my type 😩 i have it downloaded on my phone but i haven’t started playing yet because i’ve been grinding on writing i’ll probably start soon though!! i will def discuss with you hehe i’m glad you’re into it too so you’ll still be around if i enter a bit of a genshin era

YUP new theme!! hehe i think the red and white is so pretty too!! ironically it’s also the exact opposite of the black and sea green from earlier if you think about it…anyways this is the closest to festive i’ll get with the red and white being kinda christmassy ig?? also nagi’s death aura YUP it’s my fav i think it’s just sooo cool looking and fits him super well plus it looks amazing as part of the theme especially with the art i used in my pinned (at least in my opinion HAHA)

[indie-summer]

I know you love editing :P I'm curious about your process!

7, 29, 47

I really do love editing but I’m not sure I have a process 😂 let’s see what I can come up with!

7. How do you choose which POV to write from?

That’s an interesting question and I had to ponder it for a while, because usually whenever I’m thinking of a new story I’m already thinking of it from a character’s POV, so it’s more of a subconscious decision? But yes sometimes I’ve had to challenge this subconscious decision. It really depends on what I’m trying to achieve with the story, but I’d say the shorter the story, more likely I’ll go with the most self-aware character. If it’s a longer story, it’s fun to play with the POV character finding out what’s going on along with the readers; but for shorter stories, the POV character should already have enough of a comprehension of what’s going on so the readers won’t be too confused. (Of course, sometimes the confusion and misunderstanding are the whole point of the story, so it really depends!)

20. What’s your revision or editing process like?

Well the thing is, for me editing happens at the same time I’m writing, I can never go too long without revising what I have so far… So writing and editing really are almost the same thing for me when I’m the author. I guess that’s why I love beta-reading (especially if the author gives me enough freedom to make suggestions and is open to constructive criticism!), because then I already have a good chunk of text to work with. And what I love about editing is really looking for the most impactful way to convey the same message. For me, this usually means using less words and choosing the words that are closest in meaning to the message. Rearranging paragraphs is a wonderful way of bringing different meanings to the same text. So is turning dialogue into actions or inner thoughts of the POV character (and vice-versa). Not everything needs to be spelled out and I try my best to convey as much as possible in between the lines!

47. How many times do you usually revise your fic/chapter before posting?

So many times I lose count. Honestly, until I’m so sick of looking at it I can’t physically do it any longer 😂 and posting is always terrifying to me, I get sweaty, my hands tremble, I start obsessing about having posted something bad or with typos or grammar mistakes… so sometimes I keep revising the text even after I posted, it’s a curse 😭

[usergreenpixel]

MALMAISON MEDIA SALON SOIRÉE 17: THE PRINCESS OF NOWHERE (2010)

1. The Introduction

Hello, Dear Neighbors. Thank you for joining the party today. I’m feeling better, fortunately, and I’m ready to analyze media again.

Fittingly, today we’re talking about Pauline Bonaparte, the woman who had a scandalous reputation back in the day and seems like a typical party girl. Since I do like the woman, I’ve always been curious as to what kind of media is out there that tells her story.

Sure, there’s the movie called “Imperial Venus”, but it looks like Pauline is far more obscure than some of her family members (and don’t even get me started on Napoleon). So you can imagine how intrigued I was after stumbling across this particular book, written by a distant descendant of the Borghese family.

I’ll admit that the author’s identity did cause concern for me, mainly due to the potential for slander and negative bias to wriggle their way into the narrative, but the premise about the story being told from the prospective of a character close to Pauline seemed intriguing so I gave the book a shot.

Luckily, it’s available in free PDF form here. And, without spoilers, the read was… interesting.

This review is dedicated to @aminoscribbles .

2. The Summary

This is the story of Pauline Bonaparte and her tumultuous and toxic relationship with Prince Camillo Borghese, told from the point of view of Pauline’s foster daughter and distant cousin, Sophie Leclerc.

(Sophie is an original character btw. )

Sounds like an interesting idea with potential, but let’s keep going.

3. The Story

First of all, due to all the POV switching and the focus on Paulette, you can pretty much forget about Sophie since she fades into the background rather quickly and becomes irrelevant faster than a new fashion trend. Kinda makes me wonder why she was even in the book to begin with.

The plot pacing is also clunky, clumsily intertwined with flashbacks and fictional letters, but apparently the author is writing for the first time so of course it’s not going to be flawless. Still, I do wish he worked a bit more on the story before publication. 

The negative bias also is there but it’s a weird mixed bag and not as bad as I expected - there’s at least an attempt to make Pauline a complex character and tell the story of a toxic yet ultimately loving couple, so points for effort.

Unfortunately, the story speed runs through moments like Pauline joining Napoleon on Elba, moments that could’ve given us more of a glimpse into her character and would definitely be more engaging than the awfully long sex scenes in the book.

4. The Characters

As I said, Sophie becomes irrelevant fairly quickly so I’m not sure what to make of her. She’s a very flat character whose initial admiration for Pauline isn’t properly justified. Nor is her relationship with the woman properly explored. A shame and a waste of potential, really.

Pauline herself isn’t evil like I expected, so it’s a pleasant surprise. However, she’s still capricious, selfish and careless. She does have nice moments like personally nursing Sophie back to health and she does genuinely grieve her husband and later her son.

However, all the nice moments are undermined by the moment when it’s revealed that Pauline poisoned herself and Sophie with arsenic to make Borghese believe that they got sick and send them to France. Err… WTF?!

(Yes, she does that in the book, even though the real Pauline was so sickly that she wouldn’t even NEED poison. As for poisoning a child… can’t imagine her doing so.)

Borghese himself is, naturally, almost a saint (duh), but still makes mistakes here and there, so he’s just flat and we never see a deeper dive into his relationship with Pauline.

To be honest, all characters are flat and underdeveloped so let’s move on.

5. The Setting

Some descriptions are good but, again, underdeveloped.

6. The Writing

The writing style is actually solid and sometimes engaging, but there are a few instances of Pauline being a bit too crass to feel realistic and those sex scenes are boring as hell.

Couple that with flashbacks and letters and yeah… it’s a hit or miss at best.

7. The Conclusion

All in all, definitely not an awful book. I’ve seen MUCH worse. That being said, it’s not a good book either. Just… decent but underbaked.

Check it out if you want, but it’s still biased towards Borghese and doesn’t do Pauline justice, unfortunately. It’s a mixed bag for me though so I will not reread this book.

Anyway, on that note, let us end our tiny soirée. Stay tuned for more reviews, everyone!

Love,

Citizen Green Pixel

[ayamari-no-goshi]

Don’t Forget to Write

AO3 -> next

Fandoms: DC (Batman comics

Summary: From Dick’s POV. Damian happened to win a contest to illustrate a new book by an up and coming author. Being the good brother he is, Dick decided to check the book.He quickly realized he was reading a very first hand account of one of Jason's old cases, and deciding to act like a normal person would, he decided to read some of the author's other works. What he found shook the very foundation of what he thought was true?  

Warnings: rated T - mostly for swearing and questionable mental health. Amnesia

Parings: none

Notes: originally uploaded to AO3. Cross-posted to tumblr

Dick took a few quick breaths and double checked he was still holding the book he had swiped from Damian before he knocked on the door frame of Bruce’s office. It wasn’t like Bruce wouldn’t appreciate the distraction from whatever paperwork built up, but the situation he wanted to bring up sounded insane, even to him.

“Hey, Chum, what’s wrong?” Bruce gave him a tired smile. From what Dick had heard from Tim and Damian, he’d been working on dismantling a massive arms smuggling ring recently. Word on the street suggested it was connected to Black Mask, but there was currently no concrete evidence to support it.

“You know how Damian recently won that contest?” he asked, deciding that was the easiest way to start.

Bruce nodded and his tired smile was briefly replaced with something warmer. While he had a hard time expressing his feelings, the man was genuinely happy for their accomplishments. The congratulations letter that Damian received which let him know he won an art contest had been placed on the fridge so anyone who would walk in could see it.

“Since the prize is the chance to illustrate an upcoming book, Damian decided to read some of the author’s other works to get an idea of the style.” Dick paused for a moment. “He said something that struck me as weird. I guess this author tends to write detective stories, but after criticizing how the cases were solved, he mentioned they sounded similar to a lot of our cases. I got curious and decided to read a few too…” He shifted his weight as Bruce’s eyes narrowed. “It’s unsettling.”

“How so?”

Dick fidgeted a moment. “This is going to sound crazy, but I wouldn’t bring this up to you if it wasn’t this weird. Bruce, these stories are nearly identical to the cases we worked on with… with Jason.”

When Bruce’s expression hardened, Dick made sure not to say anything. His brother’s name was still something everyone tried not to bring up in front of him unless absolutely necessary. It has been six years since Jason’s death at the hands of the Joker, and Bruce had never forgiven himself for it. While he had long since moved past the self-destructive phase of his grief, largely in part to Tim taking the lead on keeping him in check, it still lingered below the surface.

“Are you certain?” The intensity of the man’s voice almost made Dick shiver.

“Bruce,” he kept his voice even as he handed him the book, “I’m certain enough to bring it up to you. Take a look and let me know what you think. Maybe I am just misremembering, but there are details about characters who seemed to be thinly veiled versions of us and our rogues that only we know. The one in your hand talks about what happened when he ran The Gauntlet. It’s too spot on.”

“I will take a look.”

Dick nodded. “Let me know what you decide. Even if you don’t decide to act, I’m going to look into it. I just have a gut feeling.”

…

“I know that name,” Stephanie mentioned later that evening as Bruce began explaining why they were looking into the author, who went by the pen name ‘John Doe’. “He’s really popular with a lot of high school students.”

“Bernard really likes his books,” Tim added. A slight blush appeared on his cheeks which he stubbornly ignored. “One of the things a lot of people talk about is how it feels like they’re reading a more personal account of what it’s like to be Robin. It’s why it’s so popular. He started writing in online forums before being picked up by Gotham Publishing.”

“That’s what brought him to our attention,” Dick explained. “His books match a little too closely with some of ours, especially from…” He glanced over at Bruce.

“From when Jason was Robin,” he finished as he pressed a button on the Batcomputer. Behind him, a comparison between one of John Doe’s books and one of their cases. Several highlighted areas could be seen.

Steph, Tim, and Cass shared looks. Even Damian seemed moderately surprised. Bruce almost never brought up Jason, unless it was to remind them what they were risking if they went out unprepared. The fact that he was willing to say his name made it much more serious, especially because all of them could hear the note of pain obvious in his voice.

“I can verify our systems weren’t hacked,” Barbara’s voice drifted over from her comm line. She’d been helping Dick after he messaged her with his original suspicions. “Since that’s not the problem, I’ve been helping Dick research him. John Doe, also known as Jay Peters, doesn’t legally exist.”

“So, he forged a new identity? Or is he an illegal immigrant or trafficking victim?” Steph questioned.

“No, amnesia.” Babs paused as she brought up a contract with a couple signatures on it. “Here’s our writer’s contract with Gotham Publishing. You can see the name of Maria Valencia, one of the leading victim’s rights advocates in the city, vouching for him. So, I checked her records and found a very interesting medical file.”

“John Doe forty-seven was brought to Gotham General approximately five and a half years ago after being found dazed and severely injured in the middle of the night,” Dick spoke up as the medical file and related police report appeared on the computer screen. “Even after several surgeries, he spent a year in a coma before waking up without an idea of who he is or what happened to him. Babs, can you bring up the images?”

Dick shifted uncomfortably as he waited for Bruce’s response. At first, he thought they were dealing with a new Rogue, someone too skilled at hacking for their own good, or even a meta with an ability that allowed them to tap into thoughts or computer records. But after seeing the images, Dick was presented with a possibility he wasn’t emotionally prepared to handle. He should have waited until he finished his own investigation before he brought it up to Bruce.

“These images… are from the police reports?” Bruce questioned, emotion breaking through his normal façade. He noticed the similarities that had unsettled Dick when he first reviewed them.

“Yes,” Babs confirmed. “The GCPD were unable to find any missing persons cases that matched his description. Looks like they tried to get fingerprints, but his hands were too mangled at the time for anything useable.”

“I used the Batcomputer to see if we could get a hit. Bruce,” Dick made sure to look him in the eyes as the results were shown on the screen, “they’re a partial match to Jason. And it’s not just the fingerprints. With the exception of the injuries on his fingers, all of his other ones match his autopsy report. I know it sounds crazy, especially because these photos were taken six months after his death.”

“His hands…” Tim murmured as he reviewed the images. “It looks like he had been digging.”

“That appears to be the case.” A slight frown appeared on Bruce’s face. Dick had known him long enough to know he was trying to consider other possibilities. There had been too many tragedies in their lives for him to immediately jump to the idea the person in those images was his son miraculously returned from the dead. “Barbara, do you have any recent images of him?”

“Just one. Give me a sec.”

An image of a young man standing near Valencia, caught off guard by something, possibly the camera, appeared on the screen. Even though he appeared older, the facial structure was the same as Jason’s, even down to the slightly crooked position of his nose, something that occurred after a nasty fight with one of Two-Face’s goons. And then there were the scars. There was a particularly noticeable one over his left eye that occurred sometime before Jason came to the Manor.

Dick glanced at Bruce to see if he had the same sort of recognition he had when he first saw it, but he instantly regretted it. There was pain and an aching longing he’d rarely seen in Bruce’s expression. While he wouldn’t be convinced until he ran his own tests, he couldn’t deny the similarities.

“I’m going to double check the prints,” Bruce’s voice was thick with emotion, “and run a facial recognition.”

“Father, are you really entertaining the idea that this person…” Damian didn’t have a chance to finish his thought when Cass placed a hand on his shoulder.

“He fought to bring you back,” she reminded him as Bruce began a fingerprint and facial analysis of the author against Jason. “Let him hope he can bring another son home.” Damian didn’t have a response to that.

A few moments later, the computer showed a ninety three percent match against Jason regarding appearance. The difference in age and some newer scars, including the one that was just visible under his hairline, could be enough for why it wasn’t a complete match. The print match finished a few moments later and confirmed the partial match Dick had gotten.

“Is there a chance this Jason look alike is a clone?” When Steph caught Bruce’s glare, she held her hands up. “What? It’s a valid question.”

“It’s a possibility,” Dick stated slowly. With how delicate the situation was, he needed to make sure he properly explained his thoughts. None of them needed Bruce spiraling again. “But it doesn’t feel right. If he is, whoever made him went through a lot of work to match the injuries on his body. They wouldn’t just let him go after all of that. But instead of some diabolical plot, he’s just writing mystery novels and keeping to himself.”

“There’s something else weird,” Tim spoke up. “Look at the date he was admitted to the hospital. It matches up with when the Superboy Prime incident occurred. He was also found along the road that leads from the cemetery.”

Dick tried to forget about that. Superboy Prime, a teenaged version of Superman from another universe who got trapped in theirs. His ill-fated attempts to return home combined with his insane plans to attempt to rewrite their reality to make it closer to the one he knew had far reaching effects that they were still discovering several years later.

Bruce turned and pin one of the most intense stares Dick had ever seen on the teen. “What are you suggesting?”

“B, no one has touched his… Jason’s grave, right?”

Bruce’s eyes narrowed ever so slightly. Oh, Tim was treading a minefield. “That is correct.”

“Hypothetically, if someone broke out of it, would it have set off any alarms?”

“No, but the likelihood…”

“B, that was a reality shattering event. With everything else we’ve seen over the years, is It really so strange that he came back?” Tim pointed to the computer screen where the injuries on the author’s fingers were still visible. “Whoever this is, he dug himself out of something. Even if that’s not what happened, we should at least rule it out.”

As a Bruce took a moment to process the idea, Dick decided to speak up. “Maybe I’m misremembering, but I seem to recall a report talking about how a couple members of the Doom Patrol came back to life after everything was said and done. And I’m pretty sure there were rumors of that happening to civilians too.”

“There were,” Tim stated as he stepped forward so he could bring up some files on the Batcomputer. “Five confirmed cases in Gotham and three in Bludhaven.”

Dick felt his eyebrows raise. He hadn’t known that, and neither did the others, judging by their equally surprised expressions.

“B, I’d say that’s enough to warrant considering it. Tim and I can check the grave.” Dick sighed. “We’ll also have to rule out he’s an alternative version of Jason too. But, if I’m honest, I hope this is real.”

“I know you’re gonna want a DNA sample from him,” Steph mentioned as she glanced at the photo again. “Babs, you didn’t happen to figure out where this guy lives, did you?”

“Not yet,” she admitted.

“I did.” Everyone turned to look at Tim. “I got curious why an author would go by the name ‘John Doe’ and investigated his forum posts a while back. He hasn’t provided a lot about himself other than some of the books he likes to read. Thought it was weird, so I tried hacking his account. Most of the original posts were made from the library at the corner of Park Row, and the later ones are all from a computer owned by the publishing company. So, I hacked the publishing company instead, and it appears they’re paying for him to stay in a small apartment.”

Sighing, Dick glanced at his younger brother. “Let me guess. You already staked out the property.”

“Yeah. There’s not much in it, just basic furniture and some books. He keeps it tidy. Both times I’ve stopped by during a patrol, he’s been asleep.”

“That saves me some work, but I might have something better. What if I told you the perfect time to break into that apartment to get some evidence would be between 8am and 9am tomorrow?” Amusement crept into Babs’ voice. “Turns out he’s doing an interview with Vicki Vale. And if anyone would like to go view it in person, I have no doubt the producers would gladly welcome and save some seats for one Bruce Wayne and at least one of his children.”

…

The next morning, Dick found himself waiting with Tim, Cass, and Damian in front of the TV station while Bruce pulled some strings. While they were there, Stephanie worked on getting into the author’s apartment to attempt to get some DNA evidence for Bruce. She kept sending occasional updates. With how controlling Bruce could be when it came to things involving their family, Dick was surprised he was willing to let her do it.

If Dick had to guess, the reason dealt with what they discovered. Jason’s grave was indeed empty. The lid had been broken from the inside, giving credence to Tim’s theory. Afterwards, they headed to the apartment where the author lived. The man had been sleeping in his bed when they took their places on the building across the street, but he must have felt their eyes on him seeing as he woke up just long enough to get up and close the curtains. If Dick wasn’t mistaken, Jason had briefly glanced at them.

Even though they had to continue their patrols, Bruce kept going back to the vantage point. Seeing as he was more non-verbal than usual when he returned to the Cave, Dick doubted he got another glance at the author.

After checking another update from Stephanie, Dick mulled over the fact he wasn’t entirely sure how he felt about possibly seeing Jason again after so many years. The wary optimism from the previous night had changed into a nervous discomfort.

Jason, and Dick was pretty sure it was their Jason, had been alone for over five years. He didn’t know who he was or what happened to him. He likely didn’t even remember them. It hurt in a way Dick wasn’t familiar with. He was used to the sharp pain of loss that slowly dulled over the years, but this was a gnawing pain that seemed similar to guilt or longing. Maybe it was a combination of both. Dick didn’t want to have to treat his brother like a stranger after all this time.

There was also the possibility that by simply approaching him, they risked pulling him back into the vigilante world. He’d been out of the game for years. None of them knew how much of his training he may or may not remember. Would he want to come back to it? If he was honest, he didn’t want Jason to deal with the dangers and trauma of the job ever again, even if he wanted to once again fly across the rooftops of Gotham with his brother.

“Are you ready?” Bruce was back. He looked worn out in a way Dick had rarely seen. The combination of grief and guilt must have been taking a toll on him. The man was also trying to fight against hope because if this was just a doppelgänger or clone, it might break him all over again.

About ten minutes later, they were shown to their seats in the studio. Several members of the audience noticed their presence and began whispering. Didn’t they have anything better to do than gossip about them? Probably not. Keeping up with their family was a pastime of the city after all.

As the show started, Dick had to do has best to keep from fidgeting. He wasn’t interested in the stories or gossip of the first half of the show. Sure, sometimes that information was useful to their main job, but everything presented that particular day was old news to him.

Then the second half of the show started, and Dick’s breath hitched as he saw his brother walk on to the set. Although he’d seen a slightly out of focus image of his brother the previous night, this was different. Jason was tall and broad and looked as if he’d never been dead. But he didn’t look completely healthy. There was an unnatural leanness about him, much like he was when he was first brought to the Manor. Had he been eating properly? Or was it an unfortunate result of the recovery process? His coma had been long enough to cause muscle atrophy.

Then there were the scars. In the fluorescent studio lights, they could easily see the slight discoloration of the scars that littered his face and bare forearms. It made him look dangerous, and Dick could almost feel the rest of the audience recoil. In Gotham, scars like that tended to suggest involvement with criminals.

Interestingly, when Vicki caught sight of Jason for the first time, her eyes briefly widened in recognition. She’d interviewed their family enough over the years to be familiar with their appearances, and Dick could still remember the debate over whether or not she ever figured out their identities.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you, Mr. Doe, or do you prefer Mr. Peters?” she asked in a friendly but professional voice as Jason sat across from her after a handshake.

He chuckled. It was a hoarse but pleasant sound. “Jay’s fine, but I should probably explain my pen name. I’m considered a ‘John Doe’, an unidentified person. I have no idea who I was before waking up in that hospital, and no one else seems to either. When I started using the writing forums, I used ‘John Doe’ as a joke, and it’s kind of stuck.” His posture was open and appeared relaxed, but his eyes hardened slightly. So he wasn’t as unbothered by the situation as he appeared.

“I had been wondering about that.” Vicki was all smiles. “Is that why you’ve remained out of the spotlight?”

“You could say that.” He flashed her a crooked smile Dick recognized as the same one Jason used to try to charm people.

“What changed? I’m surprised you were willing to come on the show.”

He seemed to look past her for a moment. “Part of it was the contest. I’ll be working with the winner, and since it looks like I got into a fight with a blender and lost,” he traced some of the scars on his left arm, “the publishing team thought it was a good idea to prove I’m not secretly a Family enforcer or associated with any of the Rogues. But if you want me to be honest, I’m just tired of not having a provable identity. I want to be able to buy my own damn cigarettes.”

That statement caught Vicki and most of the audience off guard, but Dick had to stifle a laugh. Of all the things he could have said, he brought up his addiction to nicotine. He had thought Jason had quit by the time he died, but maybe it was a piece of his old life he somewhat remembered. They had theorized he started regularly smoking to help stave off hunger. Maybe that’s why he picked it up again. But since Jason was smirking, he said it to at least partially throw Vicki off.

“Of all things, cigarettes?”

Jason shrugged as he shifted positions. “Why not? That’s one of those rite of passage things, and I’m getting tired of having to bum them off of everyone. I’m old enough to make my own bad decisions… I think.”

She gave him a polite smile. “Let’s move on to your books. They’ve become extremely popular among the teens and young adults of Gotham. Why do you think that is?”

“Just like any writer, I’d like to think it’s my skills on telling an engaging story. But if I’ve learned anything from Internet forums, the real answer lies in how connected the readers feel to the main characters and how easily they can make fan fiction out of it.”

While Jason’s smile remained pleasant, Vicki’s became forced at the mention of fan fiction. She probably found the very explicit fics between her and other prominent figures of Gotham, including Bruce. Dick was still mad at Stephanie for making everyone aware of the fiction that existed about their hero personas. He could have lived without knowing.

“I think it’s a little more than that,” Vicki compromised as her expression returned to a more natural one. “How about taking us through your writing process. I’m sure the viewers would like to get a glimpse of the process.”

Jason didn’t answer immediately. Instead, he tilted his head and bit his lip, something he used to do all the time when he first came to the Manor when he wasn’t sure how to phrase something. It was one of the few hints of insecurity he’d let them see. “There isn’t really a process. A lot of my books started off as me writing random phrases. Like ‘the button to open the door was under the name plate on the desk’. Or ‘the only way to disarm the explosive was hitting the blue marker on the other side of the room’. There are days when I’ll spend hours doing it because I need them out of my head, but…” He lifted his hands and flexed them a few times. His fingers looked stiff. “I can’t physically write for long periods. Too much damage.”

He shifted again. “So, I started putting them in a computer document since it was easier to handle and organize. Some phrases just went better with others. Eventually, I realized I had these summaries of fictional events written like a police report. But it didn’t feel right to leave them like that, so I started adding more details that just seemed right. Then the next thing I knew, I had a bunch of stories. I still write like that.”

Dick found himself shaking his head. “He died, came back, doesn’t remember anything, and still writes reports? I don’t know if I should be in awe or concerned,” he whispered to himself which made Cass and Tim chuckle.

“Are you sure they’re fictional?” Vicki questioned. “I’m sure it’s been pointed out to you that your works almost feel like they’re written from the point of view of one of Gotham’s vigilantes. Perhaps someone in your family worked for the police, a stenographer, or even one of the city’s newspapers.”

He snorted. “The GCPD couldn’t identify me, so I doubt I had family there. Unless whoever it was happened to be that corrupt, and when it comes to the GCPD, that’s a possibility.” When Vicki’s eyebrows rose in surprise, Jason gave her a wry smile. “Just because I don’t remember my past doesn’t mean I’m stupid. I know the Commissioner has done a lot to help, but things still aren’t great. As for the others, that’s a possibility, but they don’t feel right.”

“And today on what you don’t say on live TV in Gotham,” Tim murmured, stunned. Almost everyone in Gotham knew there was corruption in most levels of office, including the police, but there was a real danger in acknowledging it publicly. Jason hadn’t said anything that pointed fingers at anyone, yet, but he might not realize some of the knowledge he had wasn’t public knowledge.

Vicki also knew it was a dangerous topic and quickly shifted the conversation. “Let’s talk about the contest itself. There have been a lot of criticism about how the winner of the contest is Damian Wayne, Bruce Wayne’s youngest son.”

Dick could feel how Damian tensed so he put a hand on his shoulder. “This isn’t the time,” he whispered to him. “Wait until after the show.”

“I haven’t heard anything like that. How about you enlighten me.” Jason’s voice sounded light, but there was an edge to it. He also shifted forward so his forearms were resting on his thighs. He absolutely knew what these criticisms were, and he wasn’t happy about it.

The reporter caught it too. “People believe he should have been disqualified because of his status in Gotham,” she explained with an apologetic smile, suggesting she didn’t agree.

“And if I happened to choose someone from the Bowery or Crime Alley, there would be complaints about the person being a charity case.” All previous humor had vanished from Jason’s expression and voice. “I specifically requested two things from Gotham Publishing when they brought up the contest: that all Gotham middle and high schools would be allowed to participate and that I wouldn’t be allowed to see any names. Money and home life had nothing to do with my choice. Everything was based on talent alone.”

He shifted so he was sitting up straight which allowed the fluorescent lights to highlight the scars on his face. “The winner has a rich dad, so what? Just like anyone else, he should be recognized for his own talent instead of being forced to walk in his parents’ shadow all the time. The only way I’d find issue with my choice is if we found out the kid’s dad was the one who actually drew it.”

During Jason’s explanation, Dick kept an eye on Damian. His youngest brother’s eyes had widened slightly in surprise followed by a slight smile. While he was sure Damian would never outright admit it, he was pleased by Jason’s response.

Though Damian was surprised by the defense, Dick wasn’t. Whether it was when he was acting as Robin or just being himself, Jason dealt with a lot of people judging him and their family. Although he wasn’t supposed to admit it, one of his favorite memories of Jason was finding out he got into a fight on his behalf. It wasn’t often his brother got into trouble at school, but he was being teased by boys who didn’t appreciate his former status as a street kid. It hadn’t been until they insulted Dick that he leapt to action. Alfred had personally called him to relay the story. Feeling oddly touched, Dick then liberated his brother from his room and treated him to ice cream. Even though he knew otherwise, he liked to believe Bruce never found out.

“Out of curiosity, do you think the Bruce Wayne would have done that? What?” Vicki genuinely looked puzzled when Jason snorted.

“I’m absolutely positive Bruce Wayne didn’t sketch a scene from my book. It’s not his style.” Confusion briefly crossed his face as he finished his statement. He clearly wasn’t sure why he knew that.

Vicki noticed it too. “You sound pretty certain of that. Have you met him before?”

“Since I woke up after whatever happened, no. Before that… I’m not sure.” He leaned back and briefly closed his eyes. “There are places and names that are familiar to me, but I haven’t been able to figure out why.” A sigh escaped him as he shifted again. “No one knows if I’ll ever get my memories back, not all amnesiacs do, and looking at the remnants of what happened to me, I’m not sure I want to. But at the same time, if someone’s missing me, they at least should know I’m here even if I don’t know who they are.” A sardonic smile crossed his face. “But seeing as I didn’t match any missing persons cases, I was probably never missed.”

His brother’s words felt like a slap in the face. Jason thought he’d never been missed, but that was so far from the truth. His death nearly destroyed their family. Bruce spiraled into a self-destructive depression, and Dick… The guilt had eaten at him to the point it manifested as nightmares and hallucinations. While they did lessen over the years, they never entirely vanished.

“On a lighter note, do you think you could give us a quick preview of your next book?”

Jason gave a mischievous grin. “Where’s the fun in that? But I will give you this hint: sometimes a mask is more than a mask to those who wear it.”

“That’s not ominous at all. But that’s it for time! Thank you so much for coming on the show.”

“It was my pleasure.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Notes:

depending on which version you’re reading, either Dick had an extremely antagonist relationship with Jason during the latter’s years as Robin, or it was good but distant. I prefer the good but distant..

In a mostly a Nightwing centered comic during the Discowing era, which I think is Nightwing: Year One, we learn that Bruce has a test to see if his Robins are ready for being in the field. It’s called “the Gauntlet”, and it’s a mock situation. Dick happened to be in town when Jason was running his, and of course, it went from a mock situation to a real one.

John Doe 47 – I’m not sure how many people are aware of this, but John and Jane Does sometimes get numbered if there are a lot of unidentified people discovered in a specific geographic range.

Damian did die, and Bruce literally went to Hell and back to bring him home.

In case the events of Infinite Crisis weren’t well known, Superboy Prime didn’t start off as evil. In his world, superheroes were comic book characters, but a chance encounter with the main universe’s Superman caused his own powers to manifest and then he ended up following Superman back to the main universe. He got super homesick and somewhat manipulated, and then went off the deep end. Due to plot, he ended up punching the “Source Wall” a couple times which caused ripples in reality which caused things to change across the universes. You’ll also hear it phrased as “punching the timetime.”

Jason’s resurrection is probably the best-known change that occurred outside of the creation and destruction of some of the alternative universes. But the Doom Patrol was very effected by it too – Elasti-Girl and Negative Man came back to life, and Chief was returned to his original body. A lot of back stories were also re-written. Do we know if civilians were affected? Not really. Am I going say they were? Yes

I am making a nod towards Arkham Knight and how Vicki Vale had her own talk show. This is my AU, and I conduct things as I want. I know she’s mostly a photojournalist in the comics. She can do both.

Nicotine does suppress appetite as well as increasing the rate of metabolism. It’s part of the reason a lot of people who stop smoking tend to gain a little bit of weight in the months that follow.

It’s also well known that muscle often atrophies if you’re in a coma for long periods. Jason was in one for several months after his resurrection per Red Hood: the Lost Days. Realistically, he’d be thin afterwards.

As a fan fic writer, I know that we sometimes do God’s work. I also know we sometimes make crimes against humanity.  You also can’t tell me that Stephanie wouldn’t go searching for hero-related fanfiction to use as a weapon against the family.

[saaraofthesand]

My Thoughts on The Sun and The Star.

I’ve organized my thoughts into some lists. Enjoy.

I polled my followers and they said they wanted this so you can’t get mad at me.

I must first emphasize that at 20 years old, I’m hardly this book’s target audience. I am fully aware of that.

Second, this book is fine. It’s not bad, it’s not insulting to queer people, but it’s also not the most interesting work of fiction I’ve ever read.

Third, I never finished the Trials of Apollo. I don’t think it hugely affected my reading experience with this one as I’d read all 10 of the other books and could use context clues for anything I didn’t know about. But I thought I should mention it.

Fourth, a lot of my problems with this book have also been present in all of Rick Riordan’s books post-pjo. So, these aren’t new.

Fifth, I went into this book with basically zero expectations. I’m not active in the pjo fandom (this is an anime blog), so I wasn’t seeing the book hyped up or anything. Before this, I’d basically only talked about it with my family and friends. I also don’t really read pjo fanfics. I have because I’ve gotten curious before, but I haven’t read enough to know about general fanon interpretations of characters.

Okay,

Nico has been my favorite PJO character since I was a kid (yes I grew up gay with abandonment issues shut up), so I was excited for this book.

The queerness is well done. There isn’t any “othering” of Nico, Will, or their relationship due to their queerness.

We got Italian! Nico moments, which I’ve been wanting more of since forever, so I’m happy about that. They did an okay job rounding out Will’s character. And Nico and Will’s relationship got a lot of good exposition (even if I felt that they were unrealistically mature about it). Nico’s experiences with homophobia felt very real.

Okay, now on to my critics:

Without a doubt my biggest criticism of this book is that it is very clearly fanservice. It doesn’t exist because it has a story to tell. It exists because fans wanted more Nico and Will content.

I didn’t like that the book was written from third person. I had this same critic of the Heroes of Olympus books. Rick Riordan’s strength has always been first person POVs, starting with the original PJO series. I feel like the funny chapter names, the breaking of the fourth wall, the sidebars, etc. are the reason that Rick’s prose stands out. A first person perspective is the reason the books are as funny as they are. And this book lacked that spark.

The choice to write from third person is part of what contributes to the fanfiction-esque writing style of this book. As someone who both reads and writes fanfiction, I can tell you that almost all fanfics are written from third person. This is because, for the most part, the characters you’re writing are not your own. First person is way too intimate a POV for that type of writing, and it’s why most fanfic authors don’t use it. That’s what I feel like is happening here. Oshiro is writing characters that aren’t theirs, and that means they can’t bring the intimacy of a first person POV or even a more intimate third person POV.

The book is also very on the nose with its themes and ideas. Generally, this is fine in this type of literature. This is a piece of middle-grade fiction. The target audience is middle schoolers. But also, middle schoolers can pick up on subtext. They’re young, not illiterate. There was far too much telling when they were already showing.

A good example is the title of the book. It’s very clear that “The Sun” is Will and “The Star” is Nico. I assumed that before I even opened the book. That imagery is incredibly obvious, so the authors don’t need to state it in the text. But… they do. Bob refers to Will and Nico as “My sun and star.” It was one of the moments in the book that really made me cringe.

The book has major pacing issues and is too long. I felt like it was going on forever. There were full scenes and segments that I think could’ve been cut without affecting the plot.

This book really put on display that even though Will and Nico work as boyfriends, they don’t work as partners. This contrasts Percy and Annabeth, who do work really well together since they were partners first. But Nico and Will are so bad at working together that their quest dynamic isn’t fun.

Generally, I don’t love the characterization in this book.

Nico and Will are supposed to be on this dark, dangerous quest. One so horrible no one would ever want to undertake it. It’s the House of Hades (Nyx’s Version). Except it really isn’t. It felt like they wanted to make it more psychological than the previous books, but they also weren’t totally willing to commit to everything that would entail.

Despite all the fluff in the book, it takes itself just a little too seriously. Nico and Will are 15-16. I feel like they could have had more fun with it while still tackling darker themes. Again, I know Riordan is capable of this because *gestures at the original PJO books*

Nico and Will have this weirdly mature outlook on their relationship that doesn’t fit their ages.

We don’t get PJO-esque jokes until 80% of the way through the book (yes, I kept track). There’s the “Travel Brochure” joke and the “Saturday Sundae” joke during the Nyx confrontation. Both of which invoked the feeling of reading the original Percy Jackson books. I got really excited.

Immediately after those jokes this became one of the cringiest books I’ve ever read. And I do not care to elaborate on that because I’m just happy that the book is over at this point.

Lastly, I wasn’t sure where to put this, but I read it, so now, you have to too. “‘Will, he said it has to be both of us,’ said Nico. Will hesitated at first, but an epiphany dawned in him, and his eyes went wide. ‘Together,’ he said.” After reading this, I immediately recoiled in disgust and went “UGH!” And there are multiple lines like this in the book. Absolutely horrible -7563/10. Rick, never allow another sentence like that into one of your books again. This isn’t YA. You can’t be throwing lines like that at me out of nowhere.

In conclusion:

I’ve seen people saying the criticisms of this book are the result of homophobia and… y’all no they aren’t. Most of the people I’ve seen criticizing the book are queer, including me! I’m tired of this idea that queer people just have to appreciate whatever representation they’re given without having any criticisms about it because at least it’s something. No! If Nico and Will were a straight couple, I’d still have the exact same critics of this book. I’m gay and it’s my godgiven right to dislike books that focus on gay people if the stories aren’t good.

Something that I do think is sad here is that Oshiro’s name is now on this substandard book forever. They’re a new author, and they don’t deserve that. Rick Riordan will be fine if this book isn’t received well, but Oshiro is less likely to be. That upsets me deeply as a queer writer myself. That sucks. I hate that. Go check out their books instead of this one tbh.

[legiopraesagio]

Well, I’ve finished reading Echoes of Eternity and I have something to say.

First, it’s a great book, and I don’t mean it’s just good or interesting. I mean “great” like the Great Crusade or the Great War (but in a good way, of course).

I saw a comment on the internet that says that Aaron Dembski-Bowden “makes a mistake of cramming too much stuff in a single book”.

Yes, there’s a lot of stuff in it. And it all is brilliant.

The Blood Angels Legion (and Nassir Amit personal) prehistory. Kargos and Amit, their past friendship and their grievous present. Both their duels. Kargos POV being SO poetic, though it’s a poetry of decay, and destruction, and madness, and - unanticipated display of emotions so strong and so human. I read their first duel with tears in my eyes, and it was just the first time I cried (the second was after Angron and Sanguinius fight, and the third - reading Guilliman’s letter. Yes, I’m sentimental too, thanks, Lotara).

And there’s so much more. What a great character is Transacta-7Y1. She is barely human, but in fact she is so relatable, so plain, and honest, and faithful. And I like her relationships with Arkhan Land, whose POV is one of the best, and Land’s relationships with Zephon. Oh, and have you seen one of her chapter’s name? A Curious Choice of Emissary! It sounds almost autistic, so suitable for a cyborg. In fact, it reminded me of The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time, and I’m sure ADB called it this on purpose.

Sanguinius. How did ADB manage to write him so human and so perfect, so mighty and vulnerable at the same time? So righteous and so doubting. So worth of compassion. I always thought of him with some wryness, but now I love him. And knowing his secret love to "those who struggle to reach the perfection the others take for granted", I know the Great Angel loves us back.

And Vulkan, made of pure cardboard in other books, he became alive for me after the final episode with Magnus. So full of self-rightness and so wrong. Just like all of us sometimes.

I like Lotara’s chapters less, but in any other BL author’s book, they might be the best part of it. They are bleak only compared to those I’ve written of above.

So, I think we’re watching right now how ADB becomes a great writer (“great” like in “Alexander the Great” or “Charles the Great”). And, Slaanesh bless me, I need his shirtless photo (for a friend, of course).

[tmntxthings]

would you ever consider making a donnie version of the fanfic oneshot you made with leo? :)

∑一Literature At Its Finest*･。

author’s note: long time no see ( ´▽｀) idk if this has been noticeable but i’ve been slowing down with posting overall, im struggling with motivation to write esp with the semester starting up, maybe i’ll get back into it once things have settled down c: with that being said I hope you enjoy dear anon

warnings: fluff, short drabble, donnie pov, unedited

〈 leo’s 〉

—————————————————————————

Donatello Hamato was many things, an inventor, a scientist, and obviously a genius. So he would say it’s in his nature to be curious about the unknown. Now whether that unknown be of the scientific nature… or perhaps whatever it was that had your eyes glued to your screen for approximately one hour and twenty seven minutes..? Was there really a difference between the two? Donnie didn’t think so. Neither did his growing curiosity.

He had gotten halfhearted responses from you, like “yeahhh” and/or “cool Dee,” any time he tried to broach one of his latest and greatest projects. Usually you gave him your undivided attention and Donnie loved to just soak up your beautiful gaze. Sometimes he’d lose track if he glanced up into your eyes for too long, to which you would kindly tell him where he had left off.

So what was so important (on that stupid iphone 11 that could totally be upgraded by Othello Von Ryan himself if you ever let him) that you would dare ignore him for over an hour! In. His. Presence. He cleared his throat once more,

“Dearest? Are you listening?”

You didn’t glance up but you hummed in a tone that said, yes. Donnie narrowed his eyes. You were so absorbed you couldn’t even part those gorgeous orbs of yours off of your phone for a second? Just a tiny glance his way? He huffed, and pushed out of your chair. His usual spot when he came over was at your desk. You never really used it so Donnie had a few of his things there, it was like his own work place outside of his lab. He frequented this desk whenever you couldn’t make it to the lair.

He ventured to your bed, where you lay on your back, phone in front of your face unaware of your surroundings or your boyfriend.

“Then what did I just say?” Donnie challenged and you murmured something along the lines of “listening?” The purple turtle was quick to rephrase, “No, no! Earlier Y/n, my project!” He whined, getting a little desperate now for even just a crumb of your attention. Donatello watched with baited breath as you were as still as a statue. Eyes growing wider as you looked at your screen. A tiny smile forming on your face. Completely ignoring him. And that was Donnie’s breaking point.

One of his robo hands quickly unsheathed from his battle shell (yes he wore it everywhere) and snatched your phone right from under your nose. Funnily enough your hand was frozen in a state of holding the square device as you blinked and shock overcame your expression. And finally, finally, those eyes of yours met his. “Donnie!” You lurched forward almost falling out of your bed to reclaim your phone. “Yes darling?” Donnie feigned innocence as his robotic hand moved out of your reach. He smirked as he watched you steady yourself. You breathed in a quick breath.

“I was reading!” You said as if that explained everything and made grabby hands for him to return your technological property. “Must be pretty enthralling writing for you to ignore me, your handsome boyfriend!” Donnie sniffed and his metal hand moved to allow him to peer at your screen. It was like all hell broke loose, you screeched “No no no you can’t read it!!!”

Now as a full fledged nerd, he knew these were the telltale signs of someone reading something embarrassing.. and he deduced it was fan fiction. He may or may not have had his own similar experiences… Atomic Lass was his weakness. One that Leo loved to make fun of him for. “Well now I’m intrigued!” He saw you were using one of the main sites for such literature, ao3. His smirk only grew wider, “Doth mine eyes deceiveth me? Darling what are you reading hmmmm?” He continued to tease as his eyes roamed for more information. All the while ducking and dodging your mad grabs for your phone.

“Donald!!” You gave him your warning tone. But he didn’t care. You had ignored him for too long and if this is what it took to get your attention, by Newton he would do it! Plus, truly he wouldn’t shame you for your tastes in reading, it wasn’t like he was a pure soul when it came to reader x atomic lass..! “Let’s see,” Donnie cleared his throat dramatically and you audibly gasped thinking the worst: he was about to read aloud.

“I’ve waited all my life to find someone like you,” Donnie caught onto the scene and the emotion immediately growing more romantic (and dramatic). “You are the only one for me, in this life and all the rest! His hands unclenched from fists as he gently cupped your face-“

Donnie almost got a face full of pillow if a second robo arm hadn’t shot out to bat it away. He stole a glance up from your phone finding your face heated in a pretty blush, which only goaded Donnie to continue. “He only hesitated for a moment, looking into your eyes to find love and joy overflowing, he kissed you so heatedly, drawing out a—“

“DONATELLO!!!!!!!” You howled and finally snatched your phone away from his green grasp. Quickly closing your phone and the screen darkened. Donnie raised an unimpressed eyebrow, “That won’t stop a tech genius like moi” he said hand covering his chest. “Donnie!!” You exasperated, eyes pleading for him to stop the embarrassment. He threw in the metaphorical towel, robo arms hiding back in his shell as he sat down next to you on your bed. “Dearest you must know I read such things too,” he placated you, even though his cheeks felt warm admitting it out loud.

“So you must know how I feel!” You said insinuating that reading such private things aloud were a no-go. He sighed, “even amongst us?” You wavered and that was all it took. Donnie eagerly reached forward, wanting to prove to you that you needn’t be embarrassed.

“You are the only one for me,” he quoted from the dialogue he had just read earlier. His hands caressing your cheeks gently as he leaned forward. It wasn’t unusual for the two of you to touch/kiss/hug as was the customs of dating, but it may have been odd for Donnie to be the one to initiate. So you were in a sort of frozen state as his lips murmured, “in this universe, and all those after it. I am yours,” he put his own little spin on it and sealed such romantics with a soft kiss.

You were moving after that, he was rewarded with a shy smile and your lips chasing after his. Making the heated kiss from the story come to life. “Okay maybe I won’t be so embarrassed..” you admitted after the both of you pulled away. It was quiet for a moment and then you continued, “Now what was that about your project?” A twinkle in your eye told him that maybe you had been paying more attention to him than he originally thought!

“Welllll, since my darling one is oh-so curious!” Donnie winked, making you smile brighter. The two of you moved to lay back against your pillows and he restarted his speech from the beginning. Getting all excited and making lots of hand gestures, with his real and robo hands! You were attentive once more, on your side and eyes never leaving him. He maybe blanked a couple of times, truly he lost himself within your gaze. But that was okay, you knew exactly where he left off!

[crimeronan]

can you talk about chronic illness themes in greywaren pretty please I’m so curious what you thought about the conclusion or lack therof

i've had this in my inbox for weeks and keep thinking about it and like. on the one hand i want to answer on the other hand i don't enjoy spending a lot of time talking about things i don't like. but i think i've nailed down the broad shape of my grievances wrt chronic illness real quick, so here's this and moving on

i think the first 2/3rds of greywaren were perfectly suited in tone to what dreamer trilogy had set up and there were Really good questions raised about matthew and jordan and declan and ronan and hennessy, i also think hennessy's arc (and the ronanessy culmination) was the only one that felt like it actually followed through on the chronic illness themes that had been set up. i was very very interested in jordan's thing about the act of creation keeping her awake, there's some good metaphors about artist survival there, tho ymmv. i know a lot of people with chronic fatigue aren't fond of it bc making art is Tiring and sometimes you Cannot Do It but tbh what i didn't get from jordan i got fine from hennessy so. that's all fine. then the last few chapters of the book take a hard transition into "now i have to wrap this whole universe up prettily to avoid rude tweets" and that apparently meant not having any messiness on the page, which is a shame because complex nuanced messiness is where stiefvater's writing most thrives.

adam and ronan's resolution was boring they didn't fix any of the things that were a problem wrt ronan's chronic illness and adam's Everything, joining souls in space is stupid, they already KNEW they loved each other, the love was not the PROBLEM, the problem was that they were on fundamentally incompatible life paths and loving each other DOES NOT MAKE THOSE COMPATIBLE.

declan and matthew's resolution was nonexistent, i'm actually Very Okay with the whole "matthew walks home" plotline but i needed his POV of that journey and i needed WAY more on the page from declan at the end there and i needed WAY more than "i can be fine relying on you guys bc bryde told me i should" when declan's treatment of matthew up til then had shown NO indication that matthew can EVER trust him.

bryde is the sickest person in the series and his end was far too ambiguous for my taste, especially when up to that point he and matthew had been interrogating the EXACT themes i'd wanted to see about what it means to be a dream and to be this kind of chronically ill. like we were almost somewhere there and then we just dropped everything about.... everything.

meanwhile adam is torn apart on the astral for days and days and days but wakes up fine and then bam, we flip forward 4 years and he's normal and there's no indication of any potential issues even tho there were themes traced all the way back to cdth about him and hennessy having similar chronic illnesses (thru lace metaphor). the epilogue firmly establishes that everyone is Better and that they all have stuff Figured Out Now and while i like knowing where people end up, i don't like a resolution that boils down to "and now we never need to struggle again."

i did not like greywaren's takes (or lack thereof) on chronic illness because it felt like we can't exist in a "joyful comfort read" because chronic illness is Bad and the author wants to avoid nasty tweets about doing Bad Things to characters.

i want to know what greywaren would have been if its main purpose had been to carry thru the series themes instead of to make trc fandom shut up and feel pleased about their blorbos and move on. stief talked about how she had to do a lot of rewriting with the dreamer trilogy up through greywaren bc she was so angry about being sick and. i want the angry book. i want the drafts that weren't pared down and rearranged and cut apart and spliced together to appease every normie person who's never felt constant pain or fatigue a day in their lives. the first two books were for me and will always have been for me, they are The Most Personal Books I Have Ever Consumed, but in order for greywaren to be for me, it would have had to Not be for certain people, and. well.

greywaren is for everyone.

so. shrug emoji. i guess.

[sitp-recs]

War Wounds by silentauror

Harry/Draco, Harry/Ginny (2007, Explicit, 30k)

Some wounds take longer to recover from than others. This is a story about finding the way forward. Themes of alcoholism, dubious fidelity, and a love triangle.

“Since when I do matter so much to you?” Malfoy made an impatient gesture. “That still confuses me.”

“I don’t know,” Harry said. “I just… there are certain things that you expect to be the way they are in life. I expect Hermione to know stuff. I expect Ron to be up for a pint when I want him to be. I expect the Ministry to be bureaucratic and riddled with politics. I expect you to be confident, full of yourself, snarky, and good at everything you do. I want you to be that way.”

I can’t remember the last time I read anything that wasn’t on AO3 - I’m too used to it by now! - but I felt like doing a silentauror marathon and since most of her works are on LJ I decided to explore a bit. I’ve been reading a lot of older fics since coming back from my fandom break, I think looking for some nostalgic emotional resonance. And while alcoholism and infidelity are topics I usually avoid in fic, interestingly enough those tags were exactly what made me click on it. I know this is the kind of content that would make me jump into it back in 2007 and I’m so happy I gave this a chance in the name of nostalgia because this was the lovely, heartfelt and cathartic ride I needed. I must preface this clarifying that this fic is told from Harry’s POV and focuses heavily on the infidelity theme (his conflict) rather than on the alcoholism theme (Draco’s conflict). I feel like between the two, the latter gets an overly simplified resolution that some people might find disappointing, so keep that in mind before diving in.

One thing I love about older fics and especially silentauror’s works is how well they capture the war’s dark, urgent and haunting atmosphere. We often see characters being given space to be more damaged, snappy and introspective than usual, silently fighting personal demons before asking for help. This happens to be a post-war fic set ten years after the Battle but for those who love war time / spy fics like me, I highly recommend checking SA’s works where the war drags on for years. Those are so raw and tense! Personally I love how the serious tone note permeates the narrative and allows characters to be complicated, angry, lost and vulnerable. War Wounds captivated me right away with a quiet but poignant slow burn bringing together this sassy yet broken and incredibly lonely Draco, and this weary Harry who settled for a life that doesn’t bring him any joy and finds himself caught in Draco’s orbit because he’s the one who cares. Oh boy, their dynamics are electric but also quietly soft in its tentative friendship. I almost didn’t want them to get together because I looked forward to every bit of dialogue, every moment of silent understanding where they bonded over shared trauma.

Draco’s voice took my breath away - I don’t know how SA managed to balance his sharp tongue, vulnerability and long-standing want for Harry in such a brutally honest way. He’s snarky and seductive, a badass potions expert that renders Harry frustrated in his bi disaster crisis because he can’t understand how Draco could be anything other than confident smooth and absolutely in control. And this oblivious Harry is equally lovely, jaded about his work, full of insecurities watching his relationship with Ginny ruin, confused and irritated and curious about the way Draco makes him question his sexuality, but never abandoning him on his own. As many “sexual identity crisis” stories Ginny fills the role of wrong person / bad guy but despite the amount of stories exploring this trope, this fic still feels very fresh and unique as if the author is writing a love letter to Drarry.

This fic is also intensely cinematic. So many special moments will stay with me, like the way Draco confronts Harry about keeping secrets (I love his ultimatum “if we’re going to be friends let’s cut the bullshit and talk things through”) or when Harry feels a lump in his throat seeing Draco in the rain, or their early conversation about Draco liking unavailable things, and of course the beautiful way they come together at last, intimate and understanding, Harry finally sure of his feelings and experiencing all the things that for whatever reason he never got to experience with Ginny. I found their certainty about each other really touching, yet nothing prepared me for that “This is going to be good, Harry”, I could actually feel my chest bursting with emotion. I hadn’t felt this moved by a fic ending in ages!

If you’re looking for a quietly gorgeous, mature, realistic and slightly angsty post-war romance search no more, and while at it make sure to check SA’s full catalogue, you’re in for a treat!

Read on AO3