#but i was in middle school and didnt know i was neurodivergent and was writing the most flowery language my brain could muster

[bridge-demon]

shoutout to the time i was like 13-14 yrs old at a friends house and i was working on a handwritten fanfiction about asura from soul eater getting redeemed or whatever and it took 4 pages for that fuck shit to even stand up

[creacherkeeper]

sorry if this bothers you but you seemed like a good person to talk to about this. im like 97% sure im autistic and ive done a lot of research but my mom doesn’t believe me because i’m not like the boys she’s seen on youtube. and its just awful because i’m not eighteen yet and im a black girl and i know how parents are important in the diagnosis because of childhood behavior. i just feel like no one will believe me about a diagnosis.

hi nonny

first off, not a bother AT ALL, no worries. im always happy to talk through situations like this

secondly, im sorry for the situation youre in. its one that a lot of autistic people find themselves in, so youre not alone, but its a very difficult thing to go through, especially when youre a minor without access to many resources. so know that someone sees the struggle. when i was trying to get diagnosed my parents were the exact same way. they didnt believe me at all because their only concept of autism came from rainman

so, some advice:

until youre an adult, take this time to learn as much as you can about autism, the autistic community, your own neurodivergence and how it affects you, and whether or not you actually want a diagnosis. having that official word is important for many people, and it gives you access to accommodations at work and school. but there are a lot of drawbacks to a dx as well. in situations where you are forced to disclose, there is a lot of stigma, and people may treat you poorly because of it. depending on where you live, you may be disqualified for live saving medical treatment such as transplants. it makes it infinitely harder to adopt or win custody battles. etc etc. there are many reasons one would choose to get a dx or not, so learn more, talk to people, and take this time to make a decision. if you choose self-dx, know that there are many in the autistic community who chose the same and you are loved and welcome as one of us

if you do chose to get a professional dx, know that its going to be an uphill battle. it's expensive, for one, so if you're planning on attending college or live near a campus, try finding a university teaching psych center that charges on a sliding scale. they're also going to have young professionals who hopefully are more up to date and not so set in the old conception of autism. youre also going to have more of a difficult time getting a diagnosis as a black girl, because so much of the psych field was built on sexism and racism, as well as the inherent ableism of the field. youre doubly more likely to get misdiagnosed with a behavioral or mood disorder, so know that you are allowed to stick up for yourself and be clear about your needs in the process. many (especially older) professional's picture of autism is still 10 year old nonverbal white boys. before seeing someone, ask on the phone (or have someone ask for you) whether or not they have experience diagnosing adults, women, and people of color. that could really make a difference. but also keep in mind that if one person doesnt work out, you can always see someone else. i've been misdiagnosed with things several times, and i choose not to disclose that when seeing new medical or mental health professionals unless its relevant

all that said, you do NOT need your parents to get a diagnosis. mine were not involved in my process at all when i got dx'd at 19, because i knew they would do everything in their power to convince the doctor i wasn't autistic, even if it meant bending the truth or lying. i brought them to my results session, but that was it. they argued with the doctor but she had already made her diagnosis, so it didnt matter. the rest of it was just me and the diagnostician, and i answered all questions about childhood the best i could. its totally fine to write down a list of childhood behaviors or memories before you go in if you think youll forget or miss something. for me the biggest reason i got diagnosed was the hugely variant scores i got on my IQ test, which is a common thing with autism (my scores ranged from low 30s to 99.8th percentile, with not much being average or in the middle). so the diagnostician will not only be looking to childhood or family members. there are plenty of people seeking diagnosis who dont have access to willing family anyway

i think thats all my advice as of now. but i understand how scary the situation is, or how scary it seems while youre in it. if you have any more questions or just need to talk, feel free to message again or dm me. im more than happy to listen or try to help more

[sometimesrosy]

Hey Rosy, sorry for bringing some negativity in here. I have a wonderful boyfriend and we've been living together for over an year now. I have a "stable" part time job that pays me extra for each class I teach. I have my mom and grandma just across the street. I have all the support that I need. I also have online friends, and even now reconnected with some old high school friends and we've been meeting for coffee on the weekends, although we don't talk besides that. So. Why do I feel lonely?

Didn't think I'd send another ask but just for some more context, I've had this loneliness thing for years now. I'm never satisfied, something's always making me unhappy, even my job. Now, when it starts getting late, I start feeling anxious over this lonely feeling. I just want to feel like I'm enough for myself and I don't want my boyfriend to feel like he's not good enough because I'm always lonely. He doesn't keep me from talking or seeing anyone. I don't want to feel like this forever.

+++

There's a lot going on there, honestly that I'm not sure I have the answer to. I fully recognize my limits as a counselor. I can give advice, but I'm not a therapist, and while I can see there might be things I could tell you that might help, I'm not really sure that there's not a more serious issue behind your issues, whether chemical imbalance, or hidden trauma or a disorder of some sort. That's because I don't have enough of your story and this isn't really the platform for that.

I see a few things here. First. You say you have anxiety. But anxiety about A FEELING. A feeling is just a feeling. It's not who you are, it's something fleeting that you are experience. I don't know why you're having anxiety over your feelings. What is giving you this anxiety? IDK. Is this life experience or neurodivergence or hormonal imbalance? I can't tell. And I don't want to say. It turns out my anxiety came from an auto immune disease, if you can believe it. It didnt matter how much self work I did, that wasn't going to help.

The second thing I see is that you feel you are not enough for yourself. I don't know if you meant to say it like that or not, but that leads me to believe that your "loneliness" is not about anyone else in your life, but about you. You don't know how to be alone. You maybe don't like yourself. You feel there is an inherent LACK in yourself that can't be filled with other people. That's why your situation in life makes you unhappy-- because it's reflecting yourself back at you.

You ARE worthy of love and happiness. You ARE enough. Have you tried actually loving yourself? Like, learning how to be with yourself. Spending your time with yourself doing the things you love and being in your body. Accepting yourself.

I'm an introvert, and I have been spending time with myself for a long time. This isn't the same as being alone or being lonely. I keep myself company. I would say that's one of the main purposes of my writing. I started writing journals when I was 12 to keep myself company and think my thoughts and remember things. I ask myself questions and I answer them. I let my brain wander, chattering away on paper. That led to writing poems and stories. Even when I'm not writing, my brain is entertaining me. And when I want my brain to quiet down, I read or watch tv or scroll. (scrolling actually is the least satisfying. i think it lacks a major connection or focus.) But what I'm trying to say is that I ACCEPT myself in the moment, alone or not. I believe I am OKAY, and thus I have the freedom to just be myself and be by myself.

I do think you should be aware that your feelings about things, this loneliness? doesn't seem to match your life reality. You're not alone. You have a decent life, it seems. So the loneliness is coming from somewhere else. And it might take some work on your part to figure out where that's coming from. Whether you do the work on your own or talk it out with friends or find a good self help book or get some therapy, I think this is going to take some active effort on your part. It's not going to go away by itself, I think, if it hasn't already. Unless maybe you're in the middle of it now and FEEL like it's forever although it's only a temporary perhaps cyclical feeling you get. (have you charted your period? it might be hormones making you feel this way.) Yeah, see, it could be a lot of things, and I'm not sure what.

Keep trying. Don't give up. You can figure this out.

[sunpdf]

can you do 3, 7, 13, 22 and 100?? and mayb if i want.. elaborate as to why you listen to it / how it makes you feel ?? 🥺💌

yes of course :’)

3. if it wasnt for the nights by abba 

this year has been ROUGH but my go-to pick me up song? if it wasnt for the nights baby! i listen to this when im feeling down and i need to motivate myself to go shower or study or just when im feeling like dancing around  

its definitely one of my favorite songs of all time and i have a lot of really good memories i associate with it :’) i used to work at a cafe before all of this happened and i remember blasting this while closing at the end of the day when everyone had left? i was listening to it on my way to my first date with my partner too! and once i was doing a silly little friendship quiz with my friend @persimmongal and one of the questions was “what is your friends favorite song” and i said i didnt really think i had one but she said she thought i did and that it was if it wasnt for the nights and i didnt know it then but she was right! it is! 

i think most of all it reminds me of the moments when i was growing into the best version of myself and being with my found family

7. tal uno by barrie 

i remember all the times @persimmongal told me to listen to this band. i kept forgetting to so i didnt really begin listening to barrie until maybe january of february of this year? but once i did i was hooked 

i have a tendency to get attached to certain songs for about a week at a time? basically ill listen to that song on repeat for hours every day for at least a few days in a row lmao. im pretty sure its a neurodivergent thing 

plus, im not sure what the exact name for it is but i think i really like dream pop genre of music. im really prone to zoning out and it does cause me to just forget i exist a lot of the time but not in a bad way. it makes me forget i exist in a relaxing way

13. rhiannon by fleetwood mac 

im not sure what to say about this one - it was definitely one of the songs my brain latched onto at a certain point this year. i remember i was going through a pretty bad depressive episode and i was working a lot at that time to distract myself from a lot of what was going on in my life

22. saturated by barrie 

wow you picked out two (2) barrie songs! this one is kind of the same situation as tal uno? almost all of my memories with this song i associate with @persimmongal! it reminds me of studying together with her at our favorite cafes. and we take different busses home but we used to have this little tradition where i would take her bus with her for just one (1) stop just to spend the extra 5 minutes together

100. im looking through you by the beatles 

i remember writing letters while listening to this? i had a pretty strong beatles phase in middle school lmao. i dont listen to them very much anymore but there are a few beatles songs that i listened to on repeat for weeks this year and those were michelle and im looking through you 

[soijustdidthat]

Tips from a recently graduated hs senior

talk to teachers. my gpa would be like a point higher if i did this

don’t take classes you’ll be bored in. It’s worse than the hard ones

When working on essays either pretend it’s essential research for ur favorite fictional character OR ur Alexander Hamilton in a writing contest with Aaron Burr

Not everyone likes coffee. That’s cool. Honestly hot chocolate warms u up and doesn’t give u a caffeine addiction

When u get home, change ur pants. School desks are nasty.

Bathrooms are great for small breaks from all the stimuli that schools overload on u, my fellow neurodivergents. Especially during the middle of lunch. No ones in there usually.

SCHOOL CLUBS! There’s a reason my social anxiety is more manageable and it’s clubs. Esp ones that kinda slowly increase how much u have to talk so it’s sorta like the boiling frog thing but like pleasant

Read the English books. Usually they’ll be classics and dropping references to them will garner respect from people who’ve also read them. Great conversation starters.

That test u failed won’t matter next year.

During finals, make a binder and stick important notes and reviews in there. Going through and just making the binder helps a lot.

Just because you don’t like typical study methods doesn’t mean you can’t study. Find what works for you.

Try studying in incrementally bigger intervals. Start with 5 minutes, then 10, then 20, then 30, etc. a lot of times you’ll get in a groove and won’t want to stop.

When writing essays where you choose the topic, pick something that makes you either rant or over explain. The edit your ramble.

Google books to find symbolism for essays.

IB FOLKS: PAY ATTENTION IN FIRST YEAR HOTA IF U TAKE THAT I DIDNT AND CORONA SAVED MY ASS ON THAT ONE

Poetry. Know it. It will haunt u.

Friends help with homework - half the time when ur trying to explain what u don’t get u realize ur mistake

Sweatpants are your study friend. Wear them.

Nobody will notice if you wear the same thing twice.

Carry a blanket and no one will notice. My friends and I did this in EHAP sophomore year and legit it was a blast

Relax. I’m an IB Diploma grad so I’m still learning this, but u can’t work and do well if ur brain is fried.

Have some semblance of a sleep schedule. Let’s be real, it’s not gonna be great, but try to go to bed at the same time and wake up at the same time most days.

Weekends are for sleep.

Do homework Saturday afternoon and Sunday. Don’t bother on Friday unless u want it out of the way.

NAPS. They’re great.

Keep like five bucks on u. If you can drive, every once in awhile stop by a grocery store or gas station and get ur self a treat.

DONT STAND IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HALLWAY

DONT STAND IN THE STAIRWELL.

Look, PDA just looks gross.

Don’t shove people into lockers.

You probably won’t actually be shoved into a locker. I wasn’t, and I’m the definition of nerd.

These next ones are safety oriented:

My fellow girls, keep a panic button on u, as well as a pair of scissors whenever ur staying late. Better safe than sorry.

Learn several routes around the school in case of a shooting or other emergency.

Find different hiding spots and know the entrances and exits. This could potentially save your life.

Take the shooting drills seriously. We all know gun laws suck, and until people learn that no regulations means kids die, we gotta prepare.

Alright more serious stuff over

When it comes to big tests or really anything that stresses you out, print a safety blanket: a baby toy or blanket, a fidget, things that make u feel more comfortable.

I like to have my phone in my front pocket, but some tests don’t let you have it. Folding up a few notecards gives the same pressure on ur leg.

Also, if u bounce ur leg, do it on ur toes as best u can and try not to shake the desk, cause when ur desk shakes, the people around u shake

Use caution and trust ur gut

In most schools, people don’t offer drugs or alchohol and I’ve never been nor heard of someone being peer pressured into it

Vaping is bad for you kids. Just, bad.

Have hobbies outside of academics. Not just for college, but for you.

Do school like ur trying to make Amy Santiago proud

Thank you for coming to my ted talk. I hope everyone has a great summer and the school year starts somewhat normally. Although lbr who knows what August will look like at this point. Most of these can be used in online learning too (at least where I’m at)

Stay safe!

[ironicallynyas]

i feel like such an alien right now. i almost always feel this way to some extent, whether im aware of it or not, but right now im really aware of it. i guess it comes with the territory of having adhd and autism and who knows what else, but at times it feels like 90% of my effort is put into essentially passing the turing test. even before i was consciously aware that im different ive always worked hard at trying to fit in, i guess that much is probably human nature. everyone wants to fit in, but ive never been super good at it.

i remember in upper elementary and middle school there was this one other kid i knew who was autistic, named alex. i didnt interact with alex much, but i saw how others reacted to him. he wasnt bullied much, as my school actually meant it when they said they had a no tolerance policy on bullying, and several of the teachers had experience working with neurodivergent kids and would have none of that bullshit. despite that, people treated him differently. in part i suppose this was because he was in fact a bit different, alex had trouble reading most social cues for example, far more than i or most people our age did. i have a tendency to try to assume the best of people, so i gave everyone the benefit of the doubt that most if not all of how they treated him differently was with best intentions or from simply not quite knowing how to react to him. As tolerant and progressive as my schools teachings were, and how much that rubbed off on my peers, i probably gave them too much credit. and outside of how they reacted to alex directly i saw too, part of how they thought of him when he wasnt around, the eye rolls, sighs, and groans that sometimes accompanied the prospect of having to work with him.

the reason im remembering alex now is because i always thought we were different. back then i didnt think of myself as autistic. i knew myself as having a really bad case of adhd, and was dimly aware that i was also diagnosed with something called aspergers (which is autism). besides that, even if i had thought of myself as autistic, alex and i showed a different set of behaviors and symptoms. i knew that i was WEIRD, and in my mind i held a hierarchy of weirdness/popularity. alex, even as well as we all got along with him, was probably the biggest outsider, in my mind. the next farthest out i perceived myself, followed shortly by some of my loose friends who i knew also had adhd. those others where tighter knit with both each other and the rest of the class than i, so apart from the few small cliques that isolated themselves from the class as a whole (as much as the school would let them get away with lmao) alex and i had the farthest orbits from the center in my mental social solar system model, alex being farther out than me. at least thats what i always thought. i thought that alex was more of an outsider than i was, but what if i was wrong? perhaps our orbits were not that of neptune and uranus, but more like that of pluto and neptune, each taking turns being farthest from the center. i saw how people reacted to alex when he wasnt around. maybe alex saw something of how people reacted to me when i wasnt around, things i have no knowledge of.

growing up with adhd and autism, ive always been weird. ive always felt to a varying degree and with a varying awareness of the feeling, like an alien or robot doing their best Normal Human impression. ive long known that as much as i try, my impression isnt perfect. and right now as im writing this, im unsure if i pass as neurotypical even half as good as i have always thought. i have as much way of knowing what is thought of me when i am not around as alex did.

[waterfalldancer]

bro

oh my god

i freaking love you /p

first of all thank you so much for including positives!!! i totally agree with you, i only didnt ask for them because my fic outline already highlights a lot of positives, but you mentioned things i hadn’t thought about so thank you!!!

AND I LOVE DRAGON TO TAME NOT TO SLAY its one of my fav fics of all time. i literally cried 5 times reading it its amazing.

i love how you mention the anxiety autism similarity in feelings because that was a struggle for remus (who uses it/its and bug/bugs pronouns). both it and roman (who uses he/him and star/starself) were diagnosed very late in their lives, so at first remus thought bug just had super bad anxiety but that didnt really help it with the autistic traits.

and im glad you talked about the meltdowns because roman and remus are the only two who experience regular meltdowns, and they have them very differently. roman’s meltdowns are loud and physical. star punches the ground, screams, cries, etc. its not an attention-seeking gesture, roman just struggles with processing emotions sometimes, especially when hes triggered. on the other hand, with remus, you can hardly tell its having a meltdown sometimes because it all happens in its head. remus is used to being the protector, so bug definitely has a habit of shoving its feelings aside for roman’s sake. quiet meltdowns, while also natural, are a bit of a manifestation of remus’ “role” in bugs trauma bond with roman.

yes!! as someone with autism and adhd as well, i actually have both hyperfixations and special interests, when i thought they were just really long, really intense hyperfixations lol. in my au, roman doesnt really have special interests, but he does have a lot of hyperfixations, mostly on different musicals and dance styles. but sometimes, star has hyperfixations that affect star negatively. during middle school, roman hyperfixated strongly on his own appearance and was always buying new clothes and makeup and going on all sorts of diets. the originally harmless hyperfixation led to something along the lines of an eating disorder. i think its important not to demonize hyperfixations, but to show that they aren’t all “cutesy and fun”.

at the moment, remus doesn’t have any special interests, but i think that would be a very good thing to add! remus ends up growing up to become a mural artist, so maybe its special interest could be art of some sort! probably something more specific, maybe painting or graffiti! bug could draw on every piece of paper it receives, and talk about art a lot, and think and dream about art. remus actually regularly stays up late to work on pieces, and only really gets good marks in art class. but if there’s anything else about that potential special interest that i haven’t mentioned, please let me know!

my special interests are musical theatre and tss, so they manifest a little different than an art special interest might. i feel like it depends on what the special interest is in some aspects.

and omg yes the forgetfulness is such a big thing for me too. in school, i get made fun of for being forgetful all the time, and it really wears on me. my short term memory though is amazing while my long term memory is awful.

in the au, both roman and logan struggle with forgetfulness. while it bothers roman a lot, it bothers logan (who uses they/them and fern/fernself) pronouns) a lot more. logan is very intelligent, but they see their forgetfulness as something that makes fern less smart, especially when it gets pointed out.

i totally get what you mean about asking marginalized communities for help. ive done tons of research on these things and i still continue to do so, and i have anxiety, adhd, and autism myself. but my accounts aren’t the only accurate accounts of these three things, and my goal was to try and represent things about these things that people want to read.

i personally get really frustrated by the way many tss fans write about neurodivergence, oftentimes, its very caricatured, inaccurate, romanticized, and demonized. so i figured asking for others’ opinions and desires would be a good idea so i could include more things and create a more accurate story.

so i dont really need somebody to spring from forever, just a few tidbits if anyone was willing to share.

so thank you so much for all the things you mentioned!! they were definitely helpful! 💛

i’m writing a tss fic in which all the sides (except patton lol) are neurodivergent!

roman has hyperactive adhd, autism, eds, and social anxiety.

remus has autism, ptsd, and general anxiety.

logan has inattentive adhd.

virgil has general anxiety, social anxiety, and depression.

janus has ptsd and depression.

are there any struggles that arise from these things that you guys would like to see represented through a side in my fic? things that aren’t talked about enough, or written about accurately enough?

please reblog or comment if you have anything!!

[crowsent]

Would you be willing to elaborate on the vase story?

sure why the fuck not

i was young. way young. and had a temper shorter than my height. and back then, i was even shorter than i am now. i was this waifish 4 feet thing that wore a pleated skirt and stockings with floral-print boots and had my hair up in pigtails. dainty as a prairie flower that wore an absurd pink bedazzled slap bracelet on both wrists. walked around like i was dorothy skippin down the brick road. in short. i was the furthest fucking thing from intimidating as you could get.

and back then, i was the Weird kid. we had a bitch who spoke to trees and a bastard son of a bicol politican sentenced to live in the backwoods bronies who gleefully licked stripes up down and sideways on the classroom wall. but i was the Weird Kid. because apparently being neurodivergent in my country is a death knell for children bc i got bodied. and i got bodied hard.

as in got slammed into walls “on accident” all the time, had someone write on the blackboard “i wish salt would just permanently leave” in block letters and had kids very blatantly exclude me from their games/activities/hangout-sessions. for some fucking reason, i still stayed a decent human bc while i had the full capacity to yank this bitch pricea’s dumb head into the ground and knock her frail ass unconscious i didnt.

was nice like that

anyway. because i was the Weird Kid and never fought back, resident Asshole Extrodinaire Shitface Mcgee decided to bully me hardfucking core. lets call this bastard DU.

so i was having a good fucking time by myself, running around and bothering no one bc i still liked to do physical things way back when, when DU fucking bodyslams me once or twice while i was frolicking around n bein one with nature and all that bullshit. when i decided “yeah, i need the exercise during lunch break but not when this fucker is out on the field” so i very casually jogged back.

then DU breaks a vase on me.

specifically my right knee.

huge-ass scar runnin horizontal. if you run a finger over it you can feel texture where the flesh dun heal proper. couldnt walk straight for like. two days

but i was a nice girl so i told the principal that we were horsin round and he accidentally pushed too hard and i fell on the ceramic vase and it just so happened to shatter unfortunately on my knee. was a liar back then too, but way way too nice. teachers bought it, students didnt because people saw what happened n didnt give no fucks bout me since it was the most amusin thing to happen in a while. you know. just teenager things. casually observe someone get bullied and injured and bleeding all over the ground cus its fun.

so the news of the vase thing spread around the school because the school is a private one and rumours fly like tp off shelves and i guess the constant talk about me bein a coward pushover who dont know how to fight back kinda made me snap????? like. i can put up with bullyin and physical abuse by people taller and heavier than me no problem but the moment you call me an idiot who cant swing a fist, i mcfucking lose it.

so.

injured right leg, limpin like a newborn fawn caught its leg in a trap and the DU motherfucker accosts me again in the middle of a dark hallway on the first floor between the canteen and the dining room. says “sorry you tripped onto the vase” like an ASSHOLE bc we both know i sure as fuck didnt trip and then the bitch had the nerve to say “you should look where youre goin” like it was my fault theres a tear in my fucking knee.

then he took my glasses and told me to walk back to class but be careful goin up the stairs cus i might trip and injure my other knee. then the motherfucker laughed.

and then i broke his nose and dislocated his wrist.

real nice story. feral salt fucking surfaced that day. im still nice i guess but my first response can and will be physical violence bc thats the only goddamn language that seems to work around people

gives me a real kick when people who see the scar ask me about it and then i get to watch their faces go from pity to this perfect mix of fear and concern and threatened at the same time when i tell them that i broke the motherfuckers nose, dislocated his wrist, and enjoyed doing it. i get such a good kick from the looks on their faces. aint nothin better

injury’s all healed up too.

bastard couldnt even break the vase over my knee properly. dont feel nothin on my right leg now. all he did was push “nice good christian girl” salt down and bring “feral, unhinged, will murder your family for the price of one corn chip” salt to the surface.

[transsexualhamlet]

abawnegi;oh;ahweig;!!!! TYSM!!

1: What’s your favourite fic that you’ve written (or what’s one you want to hype up?) hmmm. Man. You cant just ask me what my favorite fic ever is. Every single time I write a new fic all my old fics are Shit

2: What’s your favourite fic title that you’ve come up with? I'm not super great with names tbh and either its going to be Ridiculous or describes some emotion which im going to write to death in it, I think "kureto is going to kill them for this" was pretty funny. But I'm kind of tempted to say the fic I'm working on right now lol it's just called "Osamu Dazai Is Dead" i feel like that speaks for itself lol

3: How do you get inspiration to write? I also get it a lot from music, but a lot of the times it's just from bouncing headcanons and observations and ideas and problems with the canon to my friends. Sometimes we can just come up with an idea and just build and build on it and that then becomes the thing that I write. I love my friends we say such dumb shit

4: What’s your favourite genre/subgenre of fic to write? I feel like it's pretty evident that I'm an angst writer. It's pretty much always angst with a happy ending or at least a satisfying ending, but I write fic to rip people's hearts out or to show them that this is the point that they're making about Life look at it look at it look at it. If I were to look at all of my ao3 works, I can't really think of a single one that isnt at least in part angst. My longfics are not all angst, but like. There's plenty of it in there.

5: Do you have other hobbies? Of course!! I also draw and do theatre, you know. That's pretty much it, other than Participating In Fandom and Writing but yeah I do enjoy being the center of attention

6: What’s a fun fact about you that a lot of people may not know?

I don't really have much to say about my general life, but when it comes to writing here's something that people who ARENT my irls dont know. Everyone who's around me in person for very long is very clear about this. I write on paper, I get those fancy little journal books and I write in them before typing anything! Mostly I do that so I can be able to write even when im in a situation where I don't have my laptop with me. But it also makes me actually look through my writing after finishing it and going though the motions of making a second draft so I don't just slap something together and then throw it out into the world like that. But just because I write on paper does not make my handwriting good!! It is actually straight up illegible to anyone but me!! Like I am Known within my school for having the STRAIGHT UP WORST HANDWRITING KNOWN TO MAN and I developed that on purpose because i didnt want people to see my dumb little anime fanfiction when i was in middle school. I also used to write in like. 1 point font. Like physically with a pencil my handwriting was so small it looked like tiny dots to everyone else

7: Pick one character to self-project onto?

Oh man I project onto every character I write for, and I would say Dazai, but to be honest I feel like he's rubbing off on me instead of the other way around, that's probably not good. The character who I really did just give my entire gender, sexuality, neurodivergencies, mental illnesses, and everything else was my favorite white boy james bonde. I've never projected onto someone harder in my entire life!!

8: What’s your favourite genre of music? I don't know what genre any of the music I listen to is??? It's just??? Good noise!! I think that it's just modern rock but I know nothing about music. I like it when the people make the good noise with good lyrics

9: Who’s your favourite singer/band? That's honestly a pretty hard question now I have no clue at this point but ummmm i would die for will wood and that is obvious from my choice in favorite characters

10: How has your experience in fandom been?

I mean, mostly good?? I'm glad I waited to join internet fandom until I was like, in high school pretty much, because the internet sincerely did not need middle school me. I'm sure it would have been much worse if I had been allowed on there earlier. But by the time I really got out there, I've been actually pretty successful- I get joy out of people liking my stuff, I know how to deal with stuff, not that much drama comes my way, and people like to see what I think. I've made a lot of friends. I think the most annoying Fandom Thing that's still happening with me is the youtube comments section of that fucking bond amv that still keeps getting dumbass replies. Generally I don't regret it at all and even though everyone might not like all my stuff and I might not like everyone elses, it's been really good.

Tagging: @tg-headcanons @electrick-indigo @therealdevilape go wild go crazy!!!

Interview an Author Tag Game

Thank you @bonsaiiiiiii for the tag!

I'm going to tag @bravo-four-seal-team @sarafinatheasassin @kenirubes and @chaotictransmess because I love y'all and your works so much

1: What’s your favourite fic that you’ve written (or what’s one you want to hype up?) The Sleeping Prince! It’s ongoing rip to my old laptop, I miss you but each chapter focuses on a different character from Yuukoku no Moriarty and how they are dealing with Liam’s “death.” It’s a massive challenge, with it being angst, but I’m loving working on it.

2: What’s your favourite fic title that you’ve come up with? Ooh… probably John Tracy and The Case of The Bathtub

3: How do you get inspiration to write? Music, mainly! If I come across a song with a bit of a story, chances are I might try to spin a fic on it. Such as The Sleeping Prince, which is based from a song called The Sleeping Princess and is mighty cute

4: What’s your favourite genre/subgenre of fic to write? Supposedly, it’s fluff. Although, if you were to look at my recent pieces, you’d probably be inclined to say angst…

5: Do you have other hobbies? I absolutely love baking, especially brownies and crumbles. I do also love playing Animal Crossing, and going rollerblading

6: What’s a fun fact about you that a lot of people may not know? I dropped out of uni after completing two full years of education… to start a brand new degree at a completely different university on the opposite side of the country. I’m actually moving into accommodation on Friday and I am excited!

7: Pick one character to self-project onto? I refuse to pick one Albert and Louis! Louis has self-esteem issues, looks cute and fluffy when he can kill you, wears glasses, and needs a lot of validation and reassurance from others, while Albert is a whore™ who can act outgoing as fuck even if he has serious depression and needs a bloody massive hug

8: What’s your favourite genre of music? Rock! Whether it’s in English or Japanese, as long as it sounds good, you can bet that I’ll be bopping along to it

9: Who’s your favourite singer/band? Idlewild! I go through so many phases of liking bands/singers, but Idlewild is the one group I always return to… and they’re the only band I’ve seen live!

10: How has your experience in fandom been? Surprisingly chill! I’ve somehow swerved fandom drama in literally every fandom I’ve been in... it makes for the good life, ya know? It also means that my blog is generally safe for others in the community :D