#but i think some people forget that it really depends on the comic run

[hypewinter]

Superman can admit that he was a little awkward when he was first introduced to Connor. It had taken them both a while to get comfortable with each other and fall into roles that fit. So when he spots another clone running around Metropolis, he makes it his mission to take him in asap. He's not going to make the same mistakes he made with Connor.

[naumin]

no tall towers: a postmortem

is 'postmortem' too dark a word for it? just talking about the things I learned while organising this project :)

this one's a bit rambly but it's got a little bit of instruction inside. if anyone has any questions get in touch and let's talk BOOKS!

the concept

in april i got the idea that i wanted to organise a laios/marcille fanbook (because i LOVE them and especially because there wasn't a lot of fanwork around). i originally wanted to produce and sell a solo doujin with 1 or 2 pieces of guest art. however when money and multiple people are involved there's the question of how to compensate everyone fairly. i had several ideas of how to do this:

pay contributors a fixed amount e.g. $50 per piece (this is hard when you have no idea how much your book will earn)

pay contributors a % of sales e.g. 10% of all earnings (this is hard because you need to keep track of it for as long as your book is being sold. you may want to limit how long your book is available for for this reason*)

because i didn't want to limit how long the book was available for and to make it as simple as possible for me on the admin side, i decided to make it a free book with open submissions.

*a limited sale period can be good because promoting a project is super exhausting the longer it goes on. 1 month is reasonable imo. but because this is a rare-ish pair for a newly popular series i wanted to keep it online so fans can keep finding it.

communications

i've been in almost 20 books as a contributor, and pretty much all of them create a discord server to handle communications. some are mandatory to join, some let you opt out and receive announcements via email only. depending on the projects some are very chatty and some are extremely quiet.

the main advantages of discord ime are networking (i've made great friends from being on a project together) - which also helps with morale and giving ppl positive feedback to make their works - and for organisers gives the option of instant communication, e.g. if someone asks a question several people are wondering about, you can answer them all in one go.

the disadvantages of discord ime are people muting the server (understandable) and possibly the need for moderation - most people are extremely lovely and civil, i just am a worrier. also, discord can be a time sink... you don't want to be backreading a chat for 30 minutes when you only have 30 minutes to work on your project a day! i get distracted easily so for me that was a no go. what was good is that there is a laimar server (run by @saccharineomens) so i knew people could still chat and support each other. i'm really grateful for that.

so, if you want to avoid discord my experience is you totally can. all you really need:

an info masterdoc on somewhere like google docs or a public blog post/web page - you need to be able to edit it in case you need to add new information (with a time/date marking the change)

a way for people to submit their works like google forms or just your email

a way for people to ask questions, my main tumblr blog worked fine for me. you may want to copy your answers to common questions into your infodoc as they come up

important documents

this is the infodoc I created for this project. one thing is I did forget to specify the orientation for image works (portrait), oops.

one thing I'd really like to see more in collab projects is for organisers to list their experience. we already ask contributors to give so much... what about on the other side u know. I think a lot of people leave it out because they might not think they have any relevant experience. Really try to dig deep and list any type of project you've been in or helped complete... doesn't have to be art or fandom related.. or maybe organise a solo project first to get your feet wet.

for example I used my solo books I made for school/zine fairs. i'm a visual artist and i rarely work with text. so some of them are pure images, then some of the comics have computer lettering, but technically speaking i never formatted large amounts of text in my books so that was something new I was promising people I'd do. but it wasn't scary because I think my previous projects gave me a foundation to try new stuff like that. that's all people need to see to be willing to trust you handling their works ime.

formatting a zine

so I personally used InDesign here, it's one I've worked with before and enjoy. for other pdf projects I've also used Scribus and really like it (I'll be using it for Nerd Sex again this year) and its free!!! I haven't used Scribus to format text yet but for pure image books it's a really simple case of creating your page-size image in your art program and then inserting onto the pdf pages of Scribus lol. really easy.

for previewing, viewing, rearranging etc anything to do with your pdf I really recommend PDF24. also free!!! 5 stars incredible software.

here are the indesign tutorials I used and liked:

How to Add Page Numbers

How to keep Page Numbers on Top

How to Create a Table of Contents

What is Overset Text and How to Fix It <- essential for formatting text onto multiple pages

How to Reduce InDesign File Sizes

if this is all too complex here is the most basic 3-step method to creating a pdf book that applies to using both indesign and scribus or likely any other pdf creation software you can find

create new document. Select facing pages if you'll have double page spreads or think you might print out your book one day

locate the rectangle frame tool (indesign) or image frame (scribus) etc and draw a frame over your page (your whole page or just where you'd like your contents to go)

ctrl+d (indesign) or right click>get image (scribus), find your image and click on it. that's it!

repeat for all the other pages. that's my most basic guide to creating a pdf image-based book where all the pages are the same size.

publishing

publish on whatever platform you think is suitable (itch.io, gumroad, personal site, whatever etc.) and remember to advertise the shit out of it. if it's free keep saying it's free!!! if you feel like a resentful jaded broken record you havent repeated it enough my friend. say it one more time for good measure.

that's my messy postmortem of no tall towers to climb a 112-page free fanthology from 14 fans of laios x marcille including all new fic comics illustrations and recipes available for download and to print-at-home NOW!!! :) <3

[shinesurge]

I think it's a side effect of having a slightly bigger audience than before, but this year I've been getting a LOT of questions about offering digital editions of the KC books so I wanted to talk about it out loud for a bit.

There are a bunch of complicated reasons I've never offered the volumes as digital downloads, and I think they mostly boil down to concerns about the pretty embarrassing lack of significant internet presence Kidd Commander has accumulated over the 11 years it's been running. The audience I DO have is very enthusiastic, and let me be clear that I appreciate how unique and cool that is, especially in the era we're in where I really have no business running things the way I do lmao

The problem is, in refusing to do any of the predatory social media bullshit that tricks people into doing advertising for my comic while pretending it's a fandom, and by taking initiative to build fandom spaces for people to hang out in myself, I've created an extremely insular community where folks don't really feel any need to help it grow. "If you build it they'll come" is true, but the other half of that is people going "hey neat this thing builds itself!" and you end up with dozens of fandom posts, hours of discussion, and even fanwork locked away in inaccessible spaces while the pages on the site consistently get no comments or interaction and the public tags are empty.

WHAT does this have to do with digital editions lol

The idea was, a thing that helps set KC apart is the webcomic thing where you're not only checking a site regularly as a routine, but you're building some impression of the author as well. My little news posts are bundled with the pages, the site gives a sense of Environment in way static editions don't. In return for offering nearly a thousand pages of completely free content the reader has to Encounter Me at some point, and be made aware that this is an operation being run by a single person, and that its survival is entirely dependent on other people reading it and supporting it. Going to the site ALSO at least lets people know a comment section /exists/, and there COULD be a community to participate in. You don't get that with the books as much, but the books are almost exclusively going to folks who already read the comic, I don't think they're floating around out there to many people who didn't buy them directly from me after reading it online.

It is objectively easier for people to binge an archive they can carry around offline with them, I completely get it. But I've watched SO many new readers fall in love with this thing in real time as they leave comments behind them through the archive, and even just forming the habit of checking the site regularly really goes a long way towards forming enough of a connection with a reader for them to stick around for the long haul. If you just read it all isolated on your phone, it stops there; it's easy to forget it's an independent operation that desperately needs your support, /I/ have no idea whether you liked it or if people are even reading, and when you're finished you'll move on to something else because there's no visible fandom to engage with.

I don't WANT to think this is what will happen, but it's already been happening here for years even without proper channels. I sort of feel like this would just be facilitating my own demise lmao. All the comics who run the way I do were ALREADY popular back before the landscape shifted to fast-fashion sensibilities, so Girl Genius offering digital editions doesn't really harm them, you know? By the time forums died their community was already so stable and self-sufficient they could quit updating the main story for a whole year and not even feel it. Gunnerkrigg is signed on with fuckin Dark Horse now. People doing the things KC does got in early and stabilized before I even got started, fandom is a different world now and I'm already barely keeping this train running on my own as it is.

But on the other hand: accessibility!! HOW many times have I wanted to engage with something but they WONT LET ME PAY THEM FOR THE THING I WANT so I just leave!! The alternative here isn't "oh if i FORCE THEM to read it online they'll stick around" it's "if i can't read it how i want then i'm skipping it". That makes total sense, /I/ do that! What about people who want the extra content in the books but can't pay international fucking shipping!! It's also an Archival issue, which absolutely kills me, but that's a whole other post lmao. There are extremely good reasons to offer another option for reading my work, but I am so anxious this would just be putting a nail in this stupid coffin I've been building already.

I've been having this conversation a lot, mostly with Lee, but it came up again this morning in an email and regardless of my own feelings: this is a thing people want, a very reasonable thing, and if I fail to provide it that's just bad business. Do y'all here have any thoughts about all this? I would like to give the people what they want and y'all are The People.

Anyway buried way down here so far I'll make another post about it: I /am/ going to offer the specials as digital downloads, permanently in the shop. They're old books by now, I'm having issues keeping them in stock anyway, and they DON'T exist online anywhere, so this isn't technically any skin off my back outside of piracy issues, which. would be a stupid thing to fret about lmao

thanks for reading all this! I'm gonna go sort through pdfs for a while

[wandaxpietro]

another ask because this is the only way I know how to contribute to the Maxicest/ScarletSilver fandom (wish i could do more but college is p a i n )

but imagine if Pietro and Wanda just came out and told everyone they're dating/in love (whether as a joke or if they're being serious or idk) I am willing to bet a majority of their friends/coworkers/acquaintances/enemies would either be like: "we knew lol" or "you haven't already???" or be supportive or neutral to their relationship.

But I'm wondering... how would Magneto react? How would Lorna react? How would Magda/Marya/Natalya and Django react? (if they were alive to see it) How would Vision or Crystal react?

Hell, how would Billy and Tommy react? And Luna too? (marvel pls bring her back :((( plsss)

i feel like in the current SW&QS comic run, there will probably be some in-universe comment/rumors that since are Pietro and Wanda are together again, that they are together.

(might ask more questions/thoughts/random blurbs later ://)

ah i think you're more charitable than i am... i don't think most people who know them would be okay with it. they all probably know to varying degrees -- especially their close friends -- it's the deniability that saves it for them, that makes them able to ignore all of it. the avengers (the ones that are close to them, that is) all know, all have seen the twins in weird situations, but they've gotten very very good at looking away. none of them want to know. i think they'd be highly uncomfortable if they came out with their relationship officially, because that'd mean they can no longer ignore it, y'know? i don't think most would start a fight about it or a confrontation or anything, but they'd get weird around the twins.

(on a side note, i think clint is one of the people who'd get actually angry for a while lol. that moment when you're bisexual and your two crushes are dating etc etc. also i think carol would ask wanda if she's alright, if pietro's forcing her into anything, which would make wanda really mad. janet i think is smart enough that she's realized for a long time they're in love & knows something like that isn't going on but she wouldn't be very comfortable, either. the one i think who's most likely to "accept" it is actually tony bcuz i think he genuinely wouldn't give a fuck lol)

that aside! now for the ones you actually asked about lol. ah it's difficult.

magneto - depends on when he'd find out. during brotherhood times, i don't think he'd care, because he didn't really care about them to begin with. once he finds out they're related, at the very beginning, i think he'd be appalled but there isn't anything he can do about it, since he's an absent father trying to reconnect and has no rights to his children. once they're in the family dance for a while, he's grown a bit demanding, esp towards pietro, if that makes sense? so i think he'd probably argue with them about it lol. i don't think he'd like it, not so much bcuz of personal disgust, but mostly bcuz of optics. but also bcuz he has a desire for his children to live normal, happy lives (as much as he has trouble showing them that normally lol) and i think he'd think that would interfere with that. he's also very good at ignoring it, however -- before he'd officially find out, ofc, but after, too. he just conveniently "forgets" it. maybe starts introducing both of them to other people. they hate it.

lorna - i think lorna knows. i think she's known for a long time and while she was disgusted by it at first (and also strangely jealous; she doesn't want either of them but they've always been so close and she never had that. she doesn't have a sibling that's primarily hers, if that makes sense) i think she came to terms with it over time, enough so that she'd be pretty alright with it if they went official.

i honestly don't know about magda, django, marya and natalya... i think magda would have a lot of compassion after everything they've been through, but would treat it as an unfortunate side-effect of all of the twins' trauma, if that makes sense? she loves them a lot, though. the rest of them i don't know. i can't see any of them liking it, but marya and django might just be happy they're both alive and happy, you know? i feel like natalya would want more for them, similarly to magneto, bcuz she doesn't quite get it. but no one does. so yknow.

so billy and tommy are their kids. we know this. i think tommy wouldn't care, tbh. i can't see him being fazed or disgusted by it, also i think he'd be happy to find out pietro is his dad. they already get along, and he doesn't have a lot of people who care about him, and who want to spend time with him (vision never did lol). idk about billy..... i think he dearly loves them both but i think he might just think wanda could do better (lol). i think he'd be vaguely uncomfortable, but pietro would never play dad if billy didn't want that, so i think they're fine-ish? he'd probably get used to it eventually even when he's not thrilled. idk if he'd ever see pietro as his dad. also i think he's also known for a long time but he hasn't gotten over it like lorna has.

as for luna....... honestly she's genuinely a weird kid. she can see people's emotions & i can't see her caring much about "human" taboos. she's from a royal family, and her aunt's husband is also her aunt's (distant) cousin. i think she'd be fine, lol. she can see the love between wanda & pietro -- and tho she probably didn't realize (or didn't want to; bcuz that'd make things complicated) that it was romantic, too, she'd be relatively fine, just happy that her father's happy. she's long since been over crystal and pietro's marriage, so that doesn't bother her, either.

[drifting-pieces-blog-blog]

This is a bit random, but what songs do you associate with Marc Spector the most? I always like hearing what people like to say about this, and for me, I think it's 'Till We Die by Slipknot and Into The Void by Nine Inch Nails.

Yeah, Marc music is going to be a bit angsty.

The man has spent a good portion of his life and a big part of his character is that he hates himself and sees himself as only capable of violence and worthy of hate.

It really depends on WHICH Marc I'm thinking of, though. MCU or Comics. While they are very very similar, there is a vast difference between them in their place in their journey. MCU Marc is just getting started and Comics Marc has been at this a very long time, has come to terms with himself and his head mates, and is on his own unique path to healing. MCU Marc is on his path to letting Steven try to heal him. (Beautiful and helpful that he's letting someone help him and show him that he's loved, it can also be explored as back peddling in that now he can let Steven handle all the issues... But that's a post for another day).

SO. Back to your actual question... I have weird taste.

I have a lot of Johnny Cash: Ain't no Grave, Hurt, God's gonna cut you down, Rusty Cage....

Leonard Cohen: You want it Darker, Who by Fire, What happens to the Heart,

Timber Timbre: Run from Me.

Taylor Swift: Anti Hero (this was a weird one for me because I don't listen to Taylor Swift at all, but man "It's me, Hi, I'm the problem it's me"… If that isn't Marc I don't know what is.)

Pink: Sober, I'm not dead

Orville Peck: Let me drown

And of course who can forget the actual song from the show: Saat Saat remixed by Rayess Bek

There's a lot more, but these are the ones that just jump to the front of my mind. And some of them cross over for both comic and MCU and even cross over to bits of Steven and Jake depending on which direction you are looking.

What do you think?

[shockyeahmiguelohara]

Hello! I love your blog and find your posts really insightful I was wondering, what do you think is a key aspect of Miguel's character that makes him challenging for writers outside of Peter David to write? Some people told me that the key part of Miguel’s essence that ATSV failed to portray is that he’s a rebel is that true? I hope I'm not bothering you with the question I'm just fascinated by your perspective

what do you think is a key aspect of Miguel's character that makes him challenging for writers outside of Peter David to write?

The short version: I think a lot of writers try to make Miguel O'Hara a version of Peter Parker that works for them or that they grew up with. It falls in line with the idea that there is only "one true Spider-Man" of the franchise that fuels the backlash to Miles Morales. But instead of overt racism, you end up with a milquetoast version of Miguel that's closer to Peter Parker than a genuine iteration of Miguel.

Some people told me that the key part of Miguel’s essence that ATSV failed to portray is that he’s a rebel is that true?

I think Miguel is a collaborator by nature, but rebels when something directly opposes his principles' and moral compass (and usually after he cannot ignore it any longer).

Take for instance, the catalyst that led to his becoming Spider-Man. Alchemax experimented on a human being without any real authorization, and Miguel's cooperation led to the senseless death of Mr. Sims.

The only way he felt he could hold himself accountable for his part was quitting and putting distance between himself and Alchemax. Tyler Stone undermined that by spiking his drink with an addictive drug that would eventually kill him. The aftermath of an deliberate attempt to murder him basically gave him the means to fuck up Stone's corporation and make some kind of amends for his complicity. But it also left him with disabilities (extreme sensitivity light being one of them).

So, in general, I think Miguel is a team player when it counts, but prefers to do things his own way (which, I guess is a rebel depending on the context).

Other elements that make Miguel 'difficult' for other writers is

1): Generation Gap and the Passage of Time

In particular, Spider-Man 2099 came around the time of the much derided "extreme era" of Marvel Comics, and comics in general. Which was nothing, if not a reaction to the Comics Code Authority and its particular brand of censorship (ah-la BS&P), and the desire to cater to a much older audience of readers.

So, the end result was overcompensation and a lot of antiquated ideas that remain fairly prevalent within the modern industry's of comic book publishing (see: Ultimate X-Men, Ultimatum, One More Day, Dan Slott, Comics Gate, etc.).

Spider-Man 2099 is very much a reflection of that "extreme era" ethos, from its character design, writing, and particular depiction of the future. It's Robocop or Judge Dredd flavored, so to speak. I also think it's easy to forget that Spider-Man 2099 was apart of a larger comic book series that included Ghost Rider 2099, Hulk 2099, Punisher 2099, and etc. It was beta Ultimate Comics.

The original Spider-Man 2099 debuted in 1992, and ended in 1996, officially putting the character on ice. Even as one of the better received titles of their 90s catalogue, with a cult following, it's hard to ignore the fact that Marvel treated their 2099 titles like damaged goods, something they had to run away from to recuperate their image.

As a result, they intentionally never did anything else to really promote Spider-Man 2099 so that he'd become a household name.

A similar thing happened to May Day Parker and the Spider-Girl franchise. Despite being relatively well received, Marvel as a company did its best to basically make sure she'd never become a household name.

So, by 2014 you've got 22 years of nothing happening with Miguel O'Hara. Then Dan Slott's Spider-Verse title debuted, and introduced a bunch of a Millennial and Gen Z era readers to all of these Spider-Mans they've never heard of, or only knew in the vaguest concept.

Almost immediately after, Peter David gets to write two more volumes of Spider-Man 2099. Except this time, he more or less does away with original continuity and all its narrative ties to cater to newer readers.

2): He's treated like a novelty or an aesthetic

The cancelled Spider-Man Unlimited series from Fox Kids, a reaction to Batman Beyond (Kids WB), was initially shopped around as a Spider-Man 2099 series. But because the general audience didn't know Miguel O'Hara (a consequence of the lack of promotion), Marvel decided to use the trappings and ideas of 2099, and created another Spider-Man series with Peter Parker. They treated the series like a spiritual sequel to Spider-Man: The Animated Series (a show they cancelled).

Prior to Spider-Verse, we got things like Timestorm 2099, Shattered Dimensions, and Spider-Man: Edge of Time.

Like an extension of Unlimited, with instances like Marvel's Spider-Man that uses Miguel's costume as an alternate skin to unlock in the PS4 game. It's why The Amazing Spider-Man production process wholesale lifted the design scheme of Miguel's costume as a possible final costume for their version of Peter Parker (see: the film's concept art), but never considered, maybe, making Miguel an actual character. (But honestly, given that its TASM, that's probably for the best.)

Thirteen years after the original comic, Timestorm 2099 was some kind of an attempt to introduce Miguel O'Hara to another generation of readers (Ys and Zs). I guess, to see if they could turn a profit with him. It's one of the few SM2099 titles not written by PAD. It solidified my belief that no one at Marvel, except PAD, really considers Miguel a unique character, just a reskin of Peter Parker.

Timestorm 2099's Miguel is a really bland version of teenage Peter Parker, whose dad is a genius scientist, and no elements of his family and life from SM2099 vol 1 (Gabri, Conchata, Xina, Dana) exists in different/alternate forms. The story basically exists just to get Peter to meet teen Miguel, and not much else. It's a less entertaining version of Spider-Man 2099 meets Spider-Man.

Exceptions to the rule are Edge of Time, a story co-written by PAD. It treats him like a whole and fully realized character, it uses an iteration of his universe as part of the stakes for Miguel and Peter, whose futures are altered by Dr. Sloane. It builds on their back and forth through dialog that doesn't just fill game-time space, but informs their character. And they do this with, arguably, the most recognizable Peter Parker voice actors of their time (Christopher Daniel Barnes, and Josh Keaton).

Were it not for the game's less than stellar performance, I'd argue that was a solid selling and starting point for newcomers to Miguel that Marvel could've really pushed. If I can say anything about Dan Slott, he kept trying to make his "fetch" idea (Spiderverse) happen, and it was, in part, the reason why we ended up with more PAD-helmed 2099 stories for Miguel.

But even with that in mind, the novelty aspect of Miguel's universe as one that Marvel constantly reinforces. It refuses to give 2099 its own space to exist outside of sporadic moments. To a large degree, Across the Spiderverse is very much a representation of how Miguel is treated like a niche or kitchy idea.

And you'll notice, with Miles (the one alternate/legacy Spider-Man they're capitalizing on, however disengeniously), the way they legitmized him is by keeping him trapped within the sphere of Peter Parker (specifically, alternate or cloned versions of Peter Parker).

[24hrsoda]

So I've been trying to read more stuff on the al ghuls in comics and I already know so much can be.....counterintuitive depending on writing, but at one point I think in son of the demon ras says he fought the axis powers then death and the maidens he left Nyssa in a concentration camp 😭😭😭 how do u even parse thru everything tbhhhhh

Death and the Maidens is a run i read once and never want to touch again. Might be one of the worst comic runs i have ever read. I don’t hate many things but I hate that run so much I wish I could forget it.

It’s exactly what I mean when I say there’s moments of Ra’s being so unnecessarily evil, and it’s usually just to make another character look better/stronger/tougher. (Fanon does this too, especially with the other bat boys who afaik don’t have deep relationships with Ra’s like Bruce and Damian do.)

What reason does Ra’s (who is supposed to be a Brown Man and an extreme environmentalist) have to work with Hitler and let his own family suffer at the hand of Nazis??? Most of that was to build up Nyssa’s character as the “feisty bad girl oldest sister with daddy issues”. I think that wasn’t a great choice.

For many obvious reasons. In a world where anything can happen because it’s fiction, why use the suffering and tragedy of real people to portray a character being bad/evil? Why do you have to pair him off with some of the worst real life people? Also, how relevant is Nyssa’s entire character anyways? She doesn’t show up or do anything significant anymore. I would argue she wasn’t significant then either.

(There was also the weird pseudo incestuous thing with Nyssa and Talia where she took off all of Talia’s clothes and had her crawling around and clinging to her while naked that just…feels like it was written by A Man™️)

And it’s very much a product of its time. The 2000’s were…kind of bad for a lot of comics. It’s not a wild thing to believe that the villain who’s supposed to be Arab man in a post 9/11 world is compared to the likes of hitler for no reason other than to show readers he’s supposed to be a bad guy that we all need to hate.

Recently, in comics, Ra’s has had a redemption and has admitted his wrongdoings. Followed by him turning himself over to the authorities and wanting to share the science of the Lazarus Pit and his knowledge of Physiology with the rest of the world. Damian later came to understand that Ra’s did this because he was 100% serious about turning his life around and an “I’m sorry I was bad” wasn’t enough to prove to everyone that he wanted to be better.

Everyone can decide for themselves if they like this take on Ra’s or if they prefer him evil. At the end of the day it’s not my job to make sure everyone enjoys the character the way I do and learns what to ignore or look past. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

That being said…nobody has to like my art or my headcanons or my takes on characters. Especially the Al Ghul’s. The things I make are not canon and I really don’t want them to be canon. I just like to create things and I like drawing cute stuff ! So…can y’all please be mindful of some of the tags and comments you leave on some of my sketches 🥲

I guess I kind of waffled on….the short answer would be some comics are very much written poorly or with some kind of bias and it’s up to you to decide if you want to acknowledge it. (Canon doesn’t seem to be acknowledging these things anymore so there’s no harm in us being like “yeah that sucked” and moving on to something else)

And to remember that at the end of the day, Ra’s is not real and he has never hurt real people.

[sagesilentfire]

it's so weird I personally never saw/considered toffee as evil???? and had no idea that people hated him??????? I thought it was universally agreed he was the best and most tragic thing to happen in the series?????????

even after the rollercoaster that was comet I'm more inclined to believe he DIDN'T murder her (tbf she had it coming)

Oh, I agree with you. I don't think he's evil. But unfortunately, that doesn't erase how the writers, and a section of the fans, treated him. Maybe they were a vocal minority, but if so they were extremely vocal. Here's the breakdown:

The writers: I've explained at length how the writers screwed over Toffee. They change his motives from petty to deep depending on who they're talking to, they ignore all the mystery boxes they created regarding him, and if there's any way they want us to feel about his pointless, horrible death, it's either relief or a dull sadness that the magic wasn't destroyed right then. Not horror or righteous indignation. He isn't explicitly a tragic victim, he's barely even mentioned after, and never in a way that implies Star should feel guilty for murdering him. Explicitly, he's a faceless obstacle to be knocked over by Star after she levels up, and it's totally fine she literally melted him, it's fine! We shouldn't question the morality of our white savior protagonist, it's fine!

But the big one, and the one you were likely referring to, is the fandom. And when I made that analysis, I do admit to one cop-out: the fandom isn't like that now. Nowadays it's mostly dead, with the odd stubborn holdout (like me) posting in the tag now and then. A lot of us are Toffee fans, still posting because we liked the potential the show had and so we're imagining him as a character and not the plot equivalent of a bowling pin. But Back In The Day, when the show was still running, people celebrated Toffee's death. It was so cool that Star Vs. had the guts to graphically murder a character onscreen! Star was so cool, and here you thought this show was for kids! Her butterfly form is so cool! Yeah, so much better than that loser Steven Universe, who just talks about his feelings to the villains and solves problems with love and friendship! Never mind that there's a reason other shows don't do this, and that's because it sends a horrible message. Star should've taken a page out of Steven's book honestly.

But surely after the shock of this super cool and edgy death wore out, people started to see the tragedy inherent in Toffee's character? Nope! I mean, there were some popular analysis posts and such, but the fandom mostly forgot about Toffee, along with the writers. And while we were forgetting about that, Morningmark happened. I've talked about him before, but he's always been both a good barometer for the fandom's opinion of a character as well as a shaper of it. When he rarely goes against the fandom's majority opinion, the fandom seems to bend over backwards to make his headcanon everyone's headcanon. Even when it involves dubious characterization. I have already talked about why Morningmark is overrated, but... he just does not get Toffee, even after the show ended with Toffee kind of acknowledged as being right, even after the fandom slowly began to die. In his urge to make everything haha funny he just made it really flat and made Toffee stupid, boring, and evul, and since his comics were the only thing getting notes in the quickly-dying fandom, it made it very annoying to be a fan of depth and tragedy in svtfoe. Then he stopped making svtfoe comics and moved to making Belos stupid and other The Owl House-related crimes, and at least I don't have to worry about his dreadful takes on Toffee anymore, so that's great. 

And from there it was a short hop to the fandom we have today, where only people who got something important out of svtfoe still make content. Now, and only now, do we have the majority thinking Toffee's story, or at least what we saw of it, was the best thing to come out of svtfoe. 

Also, yeah, I wouldn't be surprised if Mina killed Comet and blamed Toffee. That would be a much better twist than the whole Moon bs.

[undercoverbisexualfrog]

TMNT - The 10 Dimensions

A few times in tmnt 2012 (and tmnt as a whole I think but I’ve really only paid attention to 2012), the 10 dimensions have been brought up. From what I know, this includes the different turtle shows/movies/universes and dimension X. But y’know what here’s my take on it.

The 1st Dimension - Oblivisci Ruler/s: N/A A Few Native Species: N/A Description: Oblivisci translates to ‘to forget’ in Latin. It is named so since it’s become known as ‘the lost/forgotten world.’ Formerly, it was a land thriving with greenery, animals, and life. This is the first and so far only full dimension to be taken over by the Kraang. Since then, it’s been completely deserted. All it is now is a barren wasteland.

The 2nd Dimension - The Crystal Colony Ruler/s: Prince Kito A Few Native Species: The Quartz People, Ruby Roses, Sapphire Salamanders, Emerald Elephants Description: A land made of crystal and gems of all shapes, colours, and sizes. The animals, plants, and people are all crystals too. This world was ravaged by the Kraang years ago and is still recovering from the damage done. The king and queen are dead and have left their teenage son in charge. Much of the land is destroyed, but under the rule of the struggling prince, it’s starting to recover.

The 3rd Dimension - PrimeVerse Ruler/s: Depends on the planet A Few Native Species: Humans, Mutants, Salamandrians, Aeons, again it depends on the planet Description: The largest of the 10 dimensions. PrimeVerse’s main location is the Prime (original/comic) Turtle’s world. Every other tmnt variation and maybe even the fanfics are all alternate world that branch off PrimeVerse. In TMNT 2012, all the non-canon season 5 things are branches too. There’s not much else to say, this is just the primary place that the shows takes place.

Branches are alternate world that are connected to one of the 10 dimensions. There is an infinite amount of them.

The 4th Dimension - Dōbutsu Ruler/s: N/A A Few Native Species: Anthropomorphic Animals, which include rabbits, cats, bears, and more Description: Usagi’s world. This is the world that appears in like every tmnt version, so again, not much to say.

The 5th Dimension - The Overworld Ruler/s: Lord Oriri Solar Knight and Lady Cadere Lunar Knight A Few Native Species: Celestials, cherubs, the Souls of the Good Description: This is basically just Heaven. The celestials are a breed of supernatural creatures from the skies who preside over the Souls of the Good. The rulers of the Overworld are a set of twins who embody the sun and moon. Oriri and Cadere also choose who goes to the Overworld and who goes to the Netherworld.

The 6th Dimension - The Netherworld Ruler/s: Kavaxas A Few Native Species: Demodragons, imps, the Souls of the Bad Description: It’s honestly just Hell. Demodragons are a species originally from the 7th dimension who have been cursed to damnation for their whole existence. They, specifically their leader Kavaxas, preside over the deceased souls of the wicked.

The 7th Dimension - Terra Mirandi Ruler/s: The Five Houses A Few Native Species: There’s a lot, but I guess gorgons, witches, unicorns, cyclopses, Description: Terra Mirandi translates to ‘Land of Wonder’. It’s known as the magic dimension. Mythical creatures of all sorts are from here, from mermaids to dragons to centaurs, fairies, yokai, and so much more, even some breeds of imps and cherubs. Terra Mirandi is run by five houses, or families, each of which govern over a portion or 'kingdom' named after them. The five houses are as follows:

The House of Amros - Cupids. The name is a combination of amor, meaning love in a few different languages, and eros, the god of love. The House of Azyrath - Hellhounds, a breed of anthropomorphic wolves with wings and fire powers. I tried incorporating the word 'wrath' into the name as fire is associated with anger. The House of Venora - An anthropomorphic deer species known as Florebou. They are also responsible for the changing of seasons. Venora is a combination of venison (deer meat) and flora. The House of Thalassa - Siraelia, a crossbreed between sirens and cecaelia. The name means sea in Greek since sirens are Greek. They rule the seas of Terra Mirandi. The House of Polilla - Humanoid white witch moths who are actually witches. Polilla translates to moth in Spanish since this particularly moth species are found in Latin America.

The 8th Dimension - The Digital Gates Ruler/s: Madame Tempestra A Few Native Species: Cyberfolk, digital bugs Description: The Digital Gates is a world almost completely cut off from outer interference. It’s really sophisticated but also cyberpunk style. The only thing that’s ever left the Digital Gates are bugs (like bugs on computers y’know). Tempestra rules the place and forbids anything else leaving for fear of exposig themselves to the Kraang and giving them a way in.

The 9th Dimension - Metamorphis Ruler/s: Changes A Few Native Species: Changes Description: Metamorphis is the world of change. Sometimes it’s daily, hourly, monthly, doesn’t matter. Nothing stays the same for long here. From the citizens, to the flora and fauna, the geography, everything changes at some point.

The 10th Dimension - Dimension X Ruler/s: Kraang Prime, Utrom Council A Few Native Species: Utrom/Kraang, Kraathatrogons, Rock Soldiers, Scatterpillars, Squibbles Description: Ah yes, Dimension X at last. This is the world of the Kraang. Like with dimensions 3 and 4, there isn't much to say about here that we don't already know from the show. All I'll add is that they've been trying to take over the 10 dimensions from the 1st to 9th, but so far have only gotten to the first 3.

[xellandria]

Oc Ask Meme!!

7,26 and B for Alexander

(https://www.tumblr.com/xellandria/725141210645315584/uncommon-questions-for-ocs-and-their-creators for ease of access)

oh no this post is going to contain art from twenty years ago, run for the hills! Also this got long lmao whoops

7. What triggers nostalgia for them, most often? Do they enjoy that feeling? For a long time, Alex had a heart-shaped pendant necklace that belonged to his first love. They were in that "this person can do no wrong" puppy-love stage of infatuation that a lot of early relationships (especially between young people) get when she was murdered and he was forced to flee because he was accused of killing both Mephala (framed) and the town's sheriff/top law enforcement guy (valid, sort of). It was the only possession of hers he had to remind him of her, and the memories associated with it were intensely mixed (a: her, but also b: murder), and after Mephala's fridging he carried it with him for a long time (somewhere between 20-200 years, depending on how my timeline for other events that aren't set in stone yet end up shaking out).

Do you know that thing that you do sometimes when you're really depressed and feeling self-flagellating where you already feel bad, so you intentionally start thinking about a Bad Thing that happened so your life can suck extra hard? And how obviously thinking about it makes you feel worse, but there's a weird undercurrent of pleasure and satisfaction at the ability to hurt yourself like that? It's weird to think of him like this because in the "present day" he's a very happy-go-lucky kinda guy like 97% of the time, but there was definitely a period in his past where he was that kind of angsty, moody teen.

And then, fourteen pages into the comic, the doofus accidentally left it behind on a bar countertop while escaping from some bounty hunters :V

28. What is their preferred mode of transportation? Alex is a big fan of the persistence predator's famous "walk 'em to death" strategy! So are a lot of my characters, I'm realizing (because other methods of transport like wagons and cars and bicycles and scooters and such suck to draw I guess, lmao). I think Alex would be an indifferent equestrian; competent enough to stay on the horse (once he learned, which I'm not sure when he would have done), but very much a sack in the saddle. While he can fly, he prefers not to because he haaaaaaaaaates his wings; there ARE humanoid creatures with wings on Meir, but a lot of them don't interface well with most of society and have a bit of a Reputation, so there's a bit of a stigma there, and people tend to stare. Alex doesn't mind being the center of attention, but he definitely prefers it to be for the things he's doing, not the thing he is.

At some point recently I said (probably on twitter) that I'd only drawn him with his wings three times: once for a "sexy" wallpaper, once for a NaNoMangO pregame meme, and once just recently for the ref sheet I posted a couple weeks ago. While I was going through First Target again for this ask just now I realized it's actually been four: his wings came out when he was fighting Viktor (which, now that I've remembered, made me go "oh yeah, that was important cos people witnessed that he wasn't human which made them go after him extra hard," it's funny the kind of details you forget after twenty years, rofl)

Edit: FIVE times, actually: I forgot I did one of those "what's your god tier" memes in the height of my Homestuckdom and he got Thief of Life.

B) What inspired you to create them? In seventh and eighth grade, in the late 90s, my friends and I were all role playing on various portions of Yahoo!'s social outlets, both in their chatrooms (Aenye, aka Ayenee aka A&E aka the Arts & Entertainment section) and on their groups (okay in fairness that was mostly just me, I don't think my RL friends indulged in that bit). I "GMed" a lot of stuff for my friends in the chats, and we had a fairly expansive storyline going, but a lot of it was pulled from things we were invested in at the time and a lot of characters were straight up just whichever media characters we were crushing on at the time, sometimes with the barcodes sanded off and sometimes not. One of the characters I "mained" at the time, both in RP with my RL friends and in various RP groups (which were mostly mixed-anime isekai-style things or directly based in the world of the anime/manga Slayers), was Xellandria Butadientium.

Xellandria Butadientium, Xella for short, was heavily, heavily, heavily based on Xelloss Metallium from Slayers, a smiling "trickster priest" with a deliciously malicious side and very obscure motivations. She was in competition with every other Mary Sue OC in those groups for Xelloss' attentions, though even at the time I (and she) was less interested in romance and sex than in just Being There and I dipped out of several groups once whoever was playing Xelloss there indicated their interest in eRPing (I was like, fourteenish and assumed I would care less/more when I got older. That, uh, never happened :Y)

When we moved on from Yahoo onto our own private forums I started redesigning some characters to be less obviously derivative and wholesale replacing others, and Xella was one of the ones hit with a redesign. She kept some of the things that had become "iconic" to her by then, but I tried to move away from the rest.

The problem here was that there were five main characters in The Bloodraven Chronicles, and only three of us bay area girls RPing; I was responsible for three of the five. One was Xella, one was James (another character who started his life being based off Xelloss, at least visually), and the other was straight up just Xelloss. That wouldn't do if we were making this an original story, which we all* had it in our heads at the time to do (because that was Just What You Did, we were formulating Aslua Studios who were going to Make It Big doing Things related to this story!). So, as Xella was originally a genderbent version of Xelloss who eventually evolved into her own thing, I figured I would just do it again, but in reverse!

Thus, alleX, who evolved over the next couple months into Alex, and whose design was finalized in September of 2001, just in time for me to be noodling around with the idea of starting a webcomic, which I would start posting to KeenSpace in November of that year.

Alex's personality takes a lot of inspiration from those old Xelloss roleplayers, though it leans into the more "human" versions, where he was less inscrutable and more just kind of silly. Nowadays he's pretty happy-go-lucky, which you would not know from anything in this long-ass post, l m a o

Anyway to cap it off, have a bonus visual chart of all this, from one of those "1 like = 1 answer" things on twitter about his D&D AU version:

(* I am reasonably sure, in retrospect, that my friends were just going along with my own desire to Make It Big (With Art) and that they had no real stake in it. In fairness, this was the correct decision/response on their part, but you know.)

[yanderecandystore]

Could you please do a fanfic for a male version of Yandere! Lady Dimitrescu (from Resident Evil Village game) with the reader.

I really like the Resident Evil franchise but I'm too lazy to know what the hell is happening in the older games XD I'm so sorry about that-

I loved watching playthroughs of Resident Evil Village (can't buy the game ;-;), but I felt like it was a bit empty, idk- I felt like the lords weren't really explored enough.

Also the Duke is the best husbando in the whole game- Fight me! >:3

TW/Tags: GN = Gender Neutral, I normally forget to properly name it when it's gender neutral, most of the time I just say "reader" // maybe ooc // lazy genderbent, I'm terrible with names // size difference // servant reader // mentions of gore/cuts/bruises/blood and deaths (and torture- I'm so sorry-) // reader gets hurt // mentions of vomiting

It's Dinner Already [Yandere!M!Dimitrescu x GN!Reader - Short Fanfiction]

It's dinner time already, unfortunately for you, of course.

It feels almost like a routine at this point- Which in a way, it is! You always take care of your tasks during the day, while dreading the inevitable time for dinner to arrive again.

Everyday, at this exact same hour, you and the other servants would prepare a meal for Lord Dimitrescu and his lovely… Sons…

As someone who has started "working" for their family only a month ago, you can positively say: Starving in the cold woods next to your village would have probably been a more merciful death than the ones you have witnessed at this place. You weren't as accustomed to such brutal executions at your village, actually you hardly even witnessed so much death, at least not so up close.

When you came here, you didn't expect to be instantly comforted and treated with respect- You were a commoner looking for an possibility to thrive in a noble's house, you were basically an easy target for any entitled selfish lord to easily belittle you and make you work for them until your hands would turn to dust. Yet nothing could have prepared you for such an odd situation.

Vampires. Monsters. Fiends if you were bold enough to insult them. You weren't exactly welcomed as much as you were snatched in and now forever trapped inside this castle. You can still hear their laughter… Their insane expressions of pure glee, the way they have bursted into maliciously laughing at your pain as you screamed for help trying to open up their door again and be free from that nightmare.

The chase didn't last even a second, they stabbed your legs with their scythes and brought you deeper inside this hellhole, as you cried your eyeballs out. The sons had brought you back inside so their father could take a look at the "intruder".

An absolute titan amongst the mortals. His height was only a sick reminder of how much power he had over the castle, over his sons, and now- Over you.

He may not have been as massive as he was threatening as you remind him to be, but at the time you were just in awe of his height considering you have never seen someone as tall and as mighty.

Then again- You have never seen vampires as well. Were they the same vampires as the books you've read as a kid? You weren't so sure of it…

You were hoping that if you begged for life and for forgiveness for having disturbed their peace, that they could spare you and let you go back to your village. Sadly enough, you commented on how you were only trying to look for a job as a servant.

You probably shouldn't have given them ideas, but it's too late to think about your mistakes now, however.

The sons begged to see your blood spilled, yet Lord Dimitrescu was merciful enough to grant you your "wish", as he said.

It has been a month ever since you were trapped inside and forced to work as a miserable little servant, and even if you didn't suffer the worst forms of punishments that they had in-store for you, you couldn't help but fantasize about just running away and never turning back.

You're so tired of this castle, of the smell of carnage, of the undeserved and over the top punishments, and especially of the people who would subjugate you to such things.

But at last, it's dinner time already, and you can't keep them waiting.

You feel your hands shaking as you walk out of the kitchen and into the dining room where the masters of the castle were so graciously waiting for you. You know what they're waiting for- But you can't let them distract you, for those that commit accidents are faced with fates worse than death.

Although you would rather do this process quickly, you can't afford mistakes to happen, so you take your time to set not only their meal in front of each one but to also pour "wine" into their glasses. You do all of this without looking directly into their eyes, only bowing down to each one and saying "excuse me"s in what they would call a "decent tone", as the smell of their disgusting beverage starts to irritate your nostrils. If you didn't know the main ingredient to Sanguis Virgins is, you probably wouldn't have this immense disgust over it, but right now just the thought of it makes you want to gag.

Only villains could so easily drink blood, and still make a living out of it.

Your internal thoughts of pure hatred against this whole situation almost completely blinded you to the fact that they were eerily, very quiet.

….

On most nights they would be talking with each other while occasionally making comments about you or your presence. Obviously they were all pretty nasty comments that they somehow expected you to back it up in some way or another, it's when they try to insert you into their conversation that makes you hate this occasion so badly, but it normally ends as quickly as it begins.

But as you are pouring wine to Lord's Dimitrescu, you notice that they haven't said a single thing while you were there. You stop what you're doing as you realize that they were silently observing you this whole time, and as you look into their expressions you come to think that maybe you have messed up-

Somehow, in some way or form, you may have messed up- And the fact this mistake could cost your head only agitates your already very worried mind.

….

A small moment of silence continues before the middle son, Cassandro, starts to chuckle in an almost innocent way- As if he was a kid who just said a bad word for the first time- And as he bursts into sudden laughter, Daniel leans towards Bello and loudly whispers:

"- I told you, they do this every time." To which Bello only replied with:

"- It's almost like hypnosis in a way."

The three sons were mesmerized by your ability to trap yourself in your own mind. They're probably aware that you do this as a defensive mechanism but they still find it comical in a weird way. You feel yourself get more tense as you look up at Lord Dimitrescu and see him staring back at you, with an unreadable expression across his face.

Before you could come up with an excuse to whatever you may have caused to disturb their dinner, the Lord himself spoke.

"- How inappropriate. As my sons, you three should know better than to laugh at our servant's airheaded mind-"

And as he said that, their smiles begin to disappear and be replaced with frowns and a bit of shame as they become stiff at their father's words.

"- And how inappropriate of you, too. To be so distracted in the presence of your masters, that's quite rude don't you think?"

But as he continued their bodies begin to relax once again as they realize he wasn't focusing on them- He was focusing on you.

Words have completely disappeared from your vocabulary as you start to think that maybe you won't be able to see another day after their meal is over. You try to mumble some possible responses before getting interrupted by him once again.

"- It's very rude, so very rude in fact that I think we deserve some answers. What were you so distracted about? What were you thinking that could have possibly taken over your small little head?"

Right now, he was sounding a bit condescending, thankfully not as angry as he would have been with the other servants right about now. Every little mistake was used as excuses for punishments- And if you were walking on thin ice before, right now you are one-step closer to breaking this entire lake and getting yourself killed by the freezing temperatures of the water below you.

Thanks to your luck (or maybe lack thereof, depending on how you see this) Daniel came to "your rescue" by coming up with an excuse for you.

"- Maybe they were hungry." He said without any indications of it being a joke or a lie- As the youngest yet craziest of the bunch, he always had that weird "naive yet dangerous" energy coming from him. He was naive enough to make that statement when it's very clear that you actually despise being near them, but he still was a son of Dimitrescu.

You know better than to underestimate any of these people.

The Lord didn't seem completely convinced as he side eyed Daniel who was blissfully eating his meal without acknowledging his dad's glance or his brother's looks of disapproval.

Without a warning you were pulled closer by your wrist and forced into sitting next to the Lord, who made a sign for another servant to bring you your food. This… Doesn't feel right at all, you're waiting for the worst to come yet you don't feel like you can ever prepare yourself enough for what they have in store.

"- M-My Lord- This isn't needed, I'm fine. I'll just continue my duties, if you can excuse me-" You plead, while trying to get up from your chair.

"- Oh but what host would I be if I didn't take better care of my guests? Poor thing, you must be starving if you can barely serve us wine-" And as his tone gets progressively more sarcastic and a bit louder, you can hear his sons snickering from the other side of the table, but you can't see them since you can't take your eyes away from him.

You're worried that if you look away for just one second, that you may not be able to see ever again.

"- It's so sad when one of our guests feels hungry- What's worse is when we are also very, very hungry."

"- Thirsty, even!"

"- Oh, I can feel my throat drying just at the thought of such misery!- Our dinner seems to be ruined."

You hear their whispers, you hear how they are clearly joking about this- How overly dramatic they're being over something so miniscule as you just- Ignoring them.

Let me remind you this is all because you refuse to look them in the eyes, that you refuse to give them any satisfaction for the heinous things they have done! You've seen so many people get hurt inside this castle only for their sick and twisted thirst and entertainment.

"- Indeed, my boys. My appetite is ruined, though dinner is not over yet-" Lord Dimitrescu spoke as he looked at his sons clearly enjoying your inevitable pain, but before he could continue he turns himself to you again, putting a hand on your arm and saying:

"- Wouldn't you agree?" Loud enough so that his sons could hear it, but soft enough to send the tiniest shivers down your spine.

"- …!"

"- No, no- Please, not again!-" He wouldn't dare do this, would he??

But before you could react he had already done it, you barely noticed how fast he had grabbed that knife to slice your wrist- His hand firmly gripping your arm as he made a deep enough cut so that your blood could be easier to access.

It somehow hurts just as badly as the first time his sons have stabbed your ankles and dragged you across the floor- At least you're not bumping into things like before, and even if it's a deep cut it's not as big as it could be if he used his claws to actually do this.

Oh, oh those claws- You almost thought he would use them on you… Those were something else. You can't remember exactly what happened, and why it happened, but you remember seeing him use those on another servant who may have crossed the line at some point.

Well "crossed the line"- More like "casually inconvenienced him". Lord Alcino may act like an incredibly high noble but he acts so childishly and in such an egotistical manner that you are surprised he can even have a castle like this in the first place! You don't remember what the servant has done to be so cruelly dismantled, but you don't doubt that it was for a stupid reason!

You miss that servant actually- Probably the only person who you actually talked with, and the first one to actually taught you how to do your job… You two could have been friends if he didn't intervene.

You briefly remember those moments before getting to experience the most weird sensation of all- Having your bloody cut be licked and sucked on. It hurts and it stings in a way that not only makes you want to cry but to also gag at the thought of you feeding this monster.

You refuse to look at him even in this scenario, you refuse to see him feeding off your blood… Sometimes you wish you were just as poisonous as some species of frogs, poisonous enough to make his mouth burn so he can experience a fraction of the pain he causes to others.

You tried fleeting away, you tried getting up and moving away but his grip on your arm only helped you in getting closer to him- You have your eyes closed as your only option is to cry and muffle your agony.

But as always, he is not satisfied with you just ignoring him. This was supposed to be a lesson, yet you're clearly avoiding your teacher as best as you can- But not today, little flower, you're not getting out of this so easily.

This is the first time he ever got to really taste your blood, as normally you would be behind the other servants while trying to learn how to please him, the only moments where he gets to see you is when it's dinner time, but oh- You're just so cruel!

Escaping inside your own little head while he has to content himself with just your image. Your presence is very much appreciated around this hour, little one-

He has noticed this before, of course, but it was only when he noticed his son's curiosity over the way you behave around them that made him organize this little trap. He didn't have everything planned actually, his plan only involved getting to this moment no matter what- And oh boy, has luck been on his side!

Your blood tastes better than expected of a commoner, your delicate and fearful whines of pain are just as delightful but what really gets him is this tough persona you try to convince everyone you have- You despise him, and it's clear to see why- But he knows his charms will probably work on you one way or the other.

He gripped your face trying to make sure you'll get to him in the eyes as he has a taste of you. Absolutely delicious, especially after you so gracefully "ruined" their dinner.

His sons were just watching as they continued to drink from their crimson glasses. They were just enjoying the show, as everything seems to easily amuse them- Their father was just showcasing how they were so much better than the common folk, and they have no other option but to take notes and to remember what they have to do if they ever feel ignored by the servants in the castle: Show who are the true masters of this place.

None of them were really interested in drinking from you, considering how all three seemed to recognize how their father has taken a liking towards you. No one would dare mess with their father's prey.

If you had enough strength in you, you would start vomiting as soon as this has started, but the more he takes from you the more you feel like you can barely stay conscious.

He wasn't supposed to take so much, at least not so soon- He wanted to just take a sip but he can't deny the fact he would rather drown himself in your blood than to let go.

He sighs, as he notices that you're slowly getting less and less aggressive, getting more and more tired as he drains you from this cut.

You're not unconscious yet, just barely stable enough to understand what's going on.

"- Sigh… Now that was a decent enough meal." He can't praise you for being tasty, can't have you being cocky around him.

"- Here, since I'm done here I'll take you to the servant's living quarters- And because I'm so kind I'll make sure that wound is safely secured and cleaned, so here- Come along now."

And as he stood up he offered you his hand so you could get up yourself, but you don't have enough energy to walk yourself to your room, thankfully you're already ready to go to bed and wish to never wake up again.

And as the nightmare never ends, he decides that if you are going to be difficult then you leave him no choice but to carry you there. How much has he taken from you?? Jesus, he should learn some self-control before doing this again- The absolute brute that he is.

Your vision may be a little screwed over because of the lack of red cells running through your body at the moment- But you have a weird feeling that you two aren't heading towards the servant's living quarters, as you feel like you two are quite literally going in the opposite direction.

Oh but it's fine- Right?

It'll be fine. Surely. After all, he already took what he wanted from you, and he doesn't seem to need more so- You probably won't have to worry about anything right now, dinner time is already over, you can finally relax now….

🍭꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖♡🍮꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖♡🍰꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖♡🍮꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖🍭

So I'm sick again- Sorry y'all, I just have a horrible immune system and I really don't understand what is wrong with me-

I'm sorry if you didn't like this boo :(

[mae-gi-writes]

Once Again (PT.I) | Iwaizumi Hajime (Haikyu!)

ONCE AGAIN : PART ONE 

Summary:  Iwaizumi’s broken marriage results in his five-year-old son trying to match him up with his primary school teacher, whom he thinks will make a wonderful replacement for a mother. 

Genre: fluff, slight angst, f!reader x dad! Iwaizumi 

A/N: There will be 2 or 3 parts of this oneshot! Depending on how long I feel like writing. Thanks for checking it out and stopping by! Let’s dive into some Iwa moments :,)

NEXT PART --> 

---

“What’s your return policy on rings?” 

The saleswoman smiles sympathetically behind the counter. That stupid sympathetic smile he’s been getting for weeks on end now. And it never stops; with his co-workers, with his family, his friends...

Iwaizumi’s sick of it. He’s sick of having to prove that he’s doing just fine, thank you very much. When in truth, his heart is constantly being torn apart and stomped upon as is people have nothing better to do than torture him in their free time. 

“I’m sorry, but these rings have been brought more than three years ago, and our warrant only lasts for three years,” the saleswoman keeps on talking but it doesn’t matter, for Iwaizumi can already feel the anger slowly creep up through the back of his neck, can already feel the vibrating emotions clogging up his sense of judgement. 

His fists clench at his sides upon impulse, the physical pain of his nails driving into his palms enough to remind him to stay cordial. It’s not the woman’s fault, the better part of him chants, it’s not her fault at all. 

“Fine,” he manages to grovel out, barely, “thanks anyway.” 

He all but storms out of the shop while shoving the rectangular box back in his pant pocket, and though it’s been more than four months since his ugly divorce with the woman he’d hoped to share the rest of his life with, the weight of their promise hangs heavy and hot upon his thigh. 

The thing is, Iwaizumi is mad. He is seething. If one were to give him a bat, he’d probably destroy the entire town by himself. Not because she was the one that cheated, not because she was the one going behind his back numerous times a week to seek out her lover when he’d been basically driven mad between Hoisuke’s cries and the stress of call meetings scheduled back to back. 

No, he’s angry. Because how the fuck could she do this to Hoisuke? How can she break the child’s heart like that, so ruthlessly, without even thinking twice about the consequences? 

Because if there is a victim in all this, then it’s definitely Hoisuke. And not only that, Hoisuke understands that his mother has been acting strange, that she doesn’t return at regular times and that her hugs now smell of cigarette smoke with a bittertaste of alcohol. 

Iwaizumi is so caught up in anger that he almost blunders past his battered Hyundai, red and chipping away at the corners. Still, this car holds so many memories, the good and the bad ones. 

“Can’t you get a newer car? I thought your company could sponsor you,” the ghost of his wife’s voice echoes through his head, a blatant reminder of all the things she’d found wrong in his life.

“Why?” he’d tilted his head around to fix his gaze on her figure bending over the sink. The TV was playing in the background and he thanked the gods that the morning comics were taking up Hoisuke’s attention, enough to distract him from his parents’ quibbles. 

“It’s just--so old and tacky.” 

“It still works well, doesn’t it? Why change it now?” 

She’d paused, hesitated slightly before blundering on, “It’s embarrassing. My colleagues keep asking if we're poor or something."

"Who cares what your colleagues think?"

Fuck her, Iwaizumi mentally swears as he turns on the ignition. Fuck her and all her needs for a better life. As if the life they had wasn't more than enough. Pulling out into the street to join the incoming traffic, he blinks away the sudden tears accumulating at the corner of his eyes and swears once more, this time aloud, glad that Hoisuke isn't in his presence when he gets in such a foul mood.

Iwaixumi may be angry. He may be filled with pent-up rage from the memory still attached to the day he'd discovered a used condom in their bathroom trash. But that doesn't mean it hurts any less.

That doesn't mean he does not still cry into his pillow over it every night.

----

"Please don't forget to do your homework for tomorrow! We'll correct them before moving on to the next chapter," you call out to your students as excited chatter fills the air. Students rise from their seats, some calling you bye and waving as they all file out of the classroom and you can't help the small smile lingering over your lips even though your feet are killing you.

Outside, parents have already lined up to collect their kids, the chatter and bustle of people ebbing away down the corridor as you let out a soft sigh.

"Miss?"

You jolt, not realizing that one of your students stands by the table wringing his hands, "what's wrong Hoisuke? Dad's not here yet?"

He shakes his head, watery eyes blinking up at you as he raises his thumb to his lips. You stand quickly and motion him to come close until he's within reach before your hand smoothes over the back of his head, "it's okay. He's probably stuck in traffic. I'll wait with you."

It's not surprising that parents get tardy once in a while and you're all too accustomed to those slight change in plans. Thankfully, you manage to distract the young boy with some coloured crayons and a piece of paper while you dial for his father's number.

It keeps ringing. No one picks up.

You try once more, one more time after that. But still, nothing. It shifts to voicemail. You decide it's better than nothing, "hi Iwaizumi-san. This is Y/N, Hoisuke's teacher. I was just wondering what time you would be picking up Hoisuke? Please call me as soon as possible. Thank you."

You end the call only to spot Hoisuke's eyes on you, intent and impatient for you to explain, "it's okay," you tell him with a smile, "he'll be here soon. Don't worry. Do you want to keep colouring some more?"

Hoisuke nods, to which your smile widens. It's those special moments, where your shyest students express themselves, that your chest warms with sympathy and affection. You've been there, you know how it feels like not to be heard, and you appreciate every interaction they offer you.

Being a primary school teacher is tough, especially since it wasn't in your original plans. But the satisfaction of bringing up some of the world's future leaders cancelled out all the late nights correcting tests and scrambled weekends trying to finish off as many worksheets as you possibly could for the coming week. You can’t complain, not when you have a decent salary that keeps bread on the table and a roof over your head.

A tug on your sleeve brings you back to Hoisuke looking up at you, a scribbled drawing of what seems to be of him and his dad. You feel yourself chuckling at how he's drawn both their hair in brown spikes, erratically extravagant and yet so close to reality.

"That's really good, Hoisuke!" You beam down at him, "what do you and your dad do on weekends?"

He shrugs shyly, head averted to the side so that there's no need for eye contact. And in the shyest voice he can muster up, he says:

"Daddy brings me...to see Mama," Hoisuke's words are barely above a mumble, "they live in different houses. They can't live together anymore."

Uneasiness squeeses in your stomach, followed by sympathy for this soft-hearted boy. You had overheard some of your colleagues giggling about Hoisuke's dad being attractive and single -- a combo that teachers adore -- but that doesn't mean that the weight of his words don't lay heavy on your own conscience.

"Do you miss your Mama a lot?" You ask him softly. Unconsciously, your hand finds a way to smooth over his head.

The boy doesn't pull away. Instead, he nods, "sometimes. But it is better this way. Daddy smiles more now. And there's no one to shout and make noise."

"Are you happy, Hoisuke? With your dad?"

He nods and to your amazement grins, "daddy is funny. He tells me not to swear but when he burns the food he always swears. And then he says to shush and tells me to close my ears. He also makes me pancakes every Saturday morning before I go see Mama."

Right on cue, a figure bursts through the open classroom door and both your heads snap to see a drenched, older version of Hoisuke who looks like he just finished running a marathon.

"I'm--" he wheezes, causing you to stand in alarm and concern, "I'm sorry I'm--so late--"

"Daddy, you forgot me again!" Comes Hoisuke's statement as you ask Iwaizumi if he's okay. He shakes off your worry with a flick of his hand and a shake of his head, "I'm fine. Sorry-- there's a nasty rain outside--"

"It's okay," you reassure him as Hoisuke practically barrels into his father and almosy knocks him off his feet.

"Sorry Hoisuke," you watch Iwaizumi's hardened features soften ever so slightly as he ruffles his son's hair. Then, looking back up at you as you bring over Hoisuke's backpack, he says, "thank you. For looking after him."

"It's no problem, honestly. We had fun didn't we?" You grin down at your student and are delighted to find Hoisuke grinning back up at you, albeit shyly, "I put his homework in his diary. He'll need to complete it for tomorrow so that he doesn't fall behind in class."

His father nods, "alright. Thanks."

"Daddy, your hair looks atrocious," Hoisuke says, tugging onto his shirt.

"Atrocious huh?" Iwazumi's eyebrow rise, "someone was listening in their English class today."

"Atrocious means that it looks bad. Daddy, your hair looks bad."

"Thanks buddy, I knew that. Now say bye to Miss Y/N."

"Bye bye, miss Y/N," Hoisuke says, wriggling his short arm through the air as you wave back with a giggle. His father nods at you in silent thanks, makes a move to walk out of the class, only to swivel back to you just as you're collecting your bag.

"Uhm," he clears his throat, causing you to jump slightly, "yes?" You blink back at him and try hard not to stare at the way his white shirt clings to his toned chest, translucent from the rain.

"Do you need a ride?"

-----

You've known Iwaizumi since high school. Having graduated just two years later than he did, his reputation had preceded him throughout the school halls even though you'd never actually had any face to face interaction with the said man. Iwaizumi doesn't know this of course and you are adamant about keeping it a secret. But that plan seems to be unraveling before your very eyes the moment your small talk turns towards your academic history.

"You're from Aoba Johsai?" His surprised glance doesn't escape your notice, especially since that's the most reaction you've gotten out of him.

"Yeah," your eyes stay glued to the row of cars crawling through the motorway, "I remember you went there too, right?"

"How'd you know?"

"You were Aoba's ace volleyball player. Everyone knew who you were."

His silence answers you and for a moment, you fear that you might have offended him. Not that it's something to be offended about.

Before you try to scratch your brain for some kind of response -- any response -- Hoisuke pipes up from the back seat, "Daddy was famous back when he was in high school. He hit the ball like kapow! And jumped so high he can touch the sky."

"Oh? Have you seen him on camera?" You turn slightly, a small smile dangling off your lips at how adorably amazed and excited Hoisuke seems to be.

"Yeah! His spikes are so awesome! It goes pow! And it zooms! Like a cannon ball!"

You burst out laughing, "yes, your father was amazing whenever he was on the court. Every girl in our class had a crush on him."

"What's a crush?"

"Hmm, you know when you really like someone. You like like them, you want to be together with them. Like, girlfriend and boyfriend."

"Oh," Hoisuke draws out, "did you really like daddy too?"

"Yeah I did."

"What?" Iwaizumi almost chokes on his own spit at the same time traffic eases and you're glad for the distraction, for you're certain there's a scattering of colour upon your cheeks.

"Do you really like him now?" Hoisuke persists, undoubtly untouched by the embarrassment taking over his father's features and you swear that more than ever, you want to laugh at how flustered Iwaizumi looks.

You decide to play nice though and instead turn to wink at your student, "that's a secret for me to keep."

You don't have to look twice to know that the man beside you is bursting into hot flames.

-----

"Did you really like Mama before you started living separately?"

Iwaizumi swears that he's never felt so uncomfortable in his life. Not when he's had to state that he was divorced, not when he had to sign divorce papers half drunk off his ass. Not even when he'd raged after his said ex-wife after finding a tie that wasn't his own in his laundry pile.

Now is probably a good definition of what uncomfortable means.

"You're not gonna let me off the hook are you?" He steals a glance at Hoisuke from over his shoulder while stirring the vegetable curry, "yes, I really liked your mother."

"Did she?"

The word 'yes' almost slips past his mouth. Except, he isn't sure whether that's the truth and decides to shoot back with, "have you finished your homework, Hoisuke? You know it's due tomorrow. Miss Y/N said so."

"Do you really like miss Y/N?"

"What?" Iwaizumi frowns, "well--no. Not like that."

"Why?" His son whines, "I really really like Miss Y/N. She's nice to me and she never shouts. And she bakes good cookies!"

"How'd you know that?" Iwaizumi leans over to taste a bit of the sauce. Not bad, he thinks and mentally pats himself on the back. A few weeks ago, he would've probably burnt the entire house down.

"Because she bakes them every month. Every time we finish a test."

"That's nice of her."

"Yes," there's a pause as the man fishes out a bowl in which to serve the curry, "daddy, what do you do when you really like someone? Do you marry them like you and Mama did?"

"Uh--yeah. Sure."

"Then does that mean I need to marry Miss Y/N if I really like her?"

"Yup."

"Daddy!"

Iwaizumi bursts out laughing. Turning off the stovetop and bringing the bowl over to the dining table, he reaches out to ruffle his son's hair with a grin, "you're the one who has a crush on miss Y/N."

"She's too old for me Daddy," grumbles Hoisuke while scooping out two rice bowls as the pair sit down for dinner, "but she'll be good for you."

"Not that simple, buddy," Iwaizumi says as he dumps two spoonfuls of curry into his son's bowl, before doing the same with his own, "there's a difference between like and love."

A frown falls over his son's face, so like his own that Iwaizumi can't help but chuckle, "what is the difference?"

"Well, when you really like someone, you might want to get to know them better. Or play with them andd shit--stuff like that. When you love someone, it's..." he hesitates, "it's different."

"Why?"

There goes that innocent question that punctures his chesy a little too deeply. The brown-haired man steadies his gaze upon the calendar fixed on the wall opposite him as he answers with:

"When you love someone, you want to live with them. You want to start a family with them. Their happiness," his brown orbs switch back to his son's focused attention, "their happiness is all that matters."

Maybe it's the fact that he's not used to speaking so truthfully about such things. Maybe it's just Hoisuke who suddenly realizes the layers hidden beneath his father's poker-faced exterior. But for a moment, neither of them speak, as if bewitched by a silencing spell if broken by the scraping of cutlery against porcelain.

"Did you love mama?"

Hoisuke's voice is small, fragile. So fragile that Iwaizumi pauses just as his spoon reaches his mouth, glancing over at his boy. His beautiful boy.

"Yeah."

Another short pause. "Did she love me?"

"Of course she did," Iwaizumi's face softens. To be honest, Hoisuke hadn't showed any kind of restraint during the entire divorce procedure, had merely accepted things as they had unfolded before his very eyes. But sometimes, Iwaizumi fears his son might be keeping more from him than he lets on.

He ressembles his mother a lot in that sense.

"Then," wet coffee-coloured eyes blink up at him, lips trembling with a hoarse whisper, "why'd she leave?"

Before his father can say anything, the young boy bursts into tears.

Iwaizumi rushes over, clasping Hoisuke in his embrace as the child buries his face into his neck and cries and cries and cries. His little heart beats like wild horses and with every sob echoing through hid body, Iwaizumi feels his own heart break over and over again. One of his hands rub comforting circles of Hoisuke's back, while the other smoothes over the back of his head as he murmurs soft nothings in hopes that it will calm down the young child.

"I want--" Hoisuke's voice is thick with tears, "I want Mama--"

"Shh, hey it's okay," Iwaizumi murmurs out, "s'alright kiddo. I got you."

Hoisuke falls asleep eventually, the soft sniffles dying out into even breaths as he slumps against his father’s shoulder, probably tired out from his earlier emotions. Iwaizumi takes this as his chance to tuck the boy into bed, glad that he’d listened to the small subconscious in his head telling him that Hoisuke would be falling asleep sooner rather than latter. 

As he smoothes over his son’s hair, a part of him wonders how much Hoisuke is still silently hurting from his mother’s departure. He can’t imagine it; suddenly changing lives like you’ve merely changed your bed sheets and Iwaizumi had been so caught up in his own heartbreak, in his own bout of silent rage, that he’d forgotten that along the way, Hoisuke was also a victim to their endless fighting, the cold war that had broken his family apart. 

He wishes he can take the pain away, ease it somehow. But it’s not that simple. The truth is, no one can actually predict how a heart gets broken, nor when it does. The only evidence are the repurcussions. And it’s only now that Iwaizumi gets to see it truly take its form. 

Leaning over to press a soft kiss to Hoisuke’s forehead, Iwaizumi murmurs his silent goodnight before walking out and gently closing the bedroom door behind him. 

He leans onto the hard wooden surface and rubs his eyes. It is only upon pulling them away that he takes notice of the family photograph hanging on the opposite wall, frozen smiles wrapped up in lies.

He really needs to take that down.

-----

[autumninaprilart]

I miss art.

The more I think about it the more I'm not sure what it is exactly that I miss? I miss being a part of a community where we could all draw together and just have that artistic interaction but then also my life and my schedule has drastically changed since I was active then. I also miss just doing art and being less anxious about it and overthinking it less.

Once I stopped trying to get into the animation field and kind of overall selling my art and doing commissions as a business I really got a lot better lifestyle wise. But my first kind of interaction with art other than something that you just do for fun was doing it in college as a degree because I literally didn't know what else I could do.

(I forget how to do a read more on mobile so bear with me til I can update it. I welcome conversation and replies!)

I found my strengths now in working with people and doing volunteer coordination and I genuinely do love what I do. But I still want to come back to art it's just hard when most of my relationship with it has been in a kind of capitalist perspective I guess.

I spend maybe half an hour looking at graphic novels at the bookstore the other day but every time I opened one and read some and was touched by bits of it or enjoyed it I had part of myself recoil and I had to put it down because I was just thinking about the dream that I feel like I abandoned.

I know in my head that I can still do art and I can still make comics and animation and stuff. But it's really really really hard to get to sink into my brain and to actually accept it.

I've been taking a break from doing art since March and the only thing that's really helped is doing a small bit of edible brownies. It just drops all the barriers and I can just make literally whatever. It doesn't matter what I may which is the wall I keep running into. I keep running into the wall that I feel like I have to have an idea ahead of time to make a piece of art and that's not usually how it works but whenever I've had a commission or an art piece I've done for like the communities I've been in there's always been like oh these ideas that you can just make and I just am not generating those in the same way anymore.

And when I do get a prompt it's usually very hard to make work and I get worked up in my brain ahead of time that no this isn't what I want to do or something and I don't even get to try it.

With the ADHD it's hard because nothing really feels right for doing most leisure things. I have the ADHD boredom really badly of "nothing feels right" And it's been especially hard the past maybe 4 months.

I'm driving to make something meaningful but I know not everything has to be finished or complete or have meaning to it. There's these comics about hamsters that I really love that are just like not making a huge difference in the world but they mean so much to me. I want to make something like that and I know I don't control what does or doesn't touch people in different ways and most things I think can't touch people and you'll probably never know about it.

I think I'm probably defining too much of my personal worth on my art that I create.

If I am able to make an art piece that touches someone to does something good in your life that feels like some kind of like qualifier for myself that I've done good but I don't have to do those things to do good.

It's not like a bad goal to have morally or whatever, but it's not something that's measurable and it's putting my own self worth dependent on an outside source which I'm trying not to do. I need to get my own positive self worth coming from myself.

I know my heart, my art, and myself are good enough as they are and they don't have to touch anyone to be something "good". I am enough just as I am. I don't need to be "more".

...

I've been trying to do art in different forms as well, but nothing quite sticks like digital art does. I have a million animations/animatics in my head that I want to do. But time and energy get in my way, so I need to push to make space for it all.

You know, I think the purest form of art I do is Contra Dancing. It's not monetized at all for me, in fact I donate money to do it. I get to be a part of these dances with people that we all create together and contradancing isn't the same if you have like very small groups of people. I go there simply to dance and to see people and to have fun and that's it. Because I enjoy it, and I enjoy the people.

Another thing was when I wore to the nursing home I spent over 200 hours of my own time playing bingo with the residents and running bingo games. That's art in itself, and we all had fun and played together!!

I can and do show my love in more ways than just digital art.

My digital art has always been tied to something I loved, be it star trek or my fascination with digital painting - much like solving a drawing puzzle.

The whole TriumviDate game was a huge labor of love!!!!!

I think I just need to reframe what digital art means to me in my head and what it looks like. It's not something I do to sell. It's not something I do for a career. (Nor do I want to)

It's a form of expression - One of many many different forms. It's a medium in which to say something and it doesn't even have to mean anything besides that I had fun making it.

All the regret I had when I think about the things I could have done and acting like that part of my life is over but it's really continuously going on. I am under a third of my lifespan If we go by the average lifespan which means (theoretically) I have over 2/3 of my life to keep going and figure things out.

There's so much to life and I just need to find a way to make art enjoy it have fun if I want to and to make it as barrier free as possible for me. I know something like that takes a lot of work - but I think it really would be worth it.

[phoukanamedpookie]

Unpopular opinion: Bonding with Team Avatar would be good for Azula.

Ironically, Team Avatar is really good at bringing out the best in people. Each member of the group has a personality trait, perspective, or life experience that Azula can connect to and learn from.

Aang would bring out the kid in Azula who's very much still in there, although deeply repressed. He'd understand what it's like to be forced into a role that demands too much from a kid. Maybe Azula thought about running away too.

Katara is who Azula would be if she were brought up in a loving environment. Beneath the surface, they're more alike than they are different. I'm dead serious about this.

Sokka can match wits with her, one of the few people in the world capable of doing that. Azula's so used to running circles around most people that she'd love having some actual competition. He'd also get her wry, dark sense of humor.

Toph is who Azula would be if her ambition and competitive streak had a healthy outlet. They both share a craving for freedom after living in a gilded cage. They each use an unusual bending style, reflecting a more refined and advanced understanding of their elements.

Suki knows what it's like to be a young person charged with commanding others in wartime. She and Azula would understand what it's like to be under pressure for responsibilities that have serious stakes.

Zuko would—enough about Zuko for now. Truly.

This would require her to allow herself to be vulnerable and human with them, which would be really tough for her because she'd still be sort of stuck in the wartime mindset of viewing Team Avatar as enemies and targets. But people keep forgetting that Azula is very smart. She would figure out on her own that if it weren't for the war, these people she was taught to treat as enemies could've been her friends, and her childhood would've been a lot less lonely.

"But what about how they'd feel about her?"

Outside of the wartime context, Team Avatar would be a lot more inclined to view Azula as a human being*, yet another kid who's been messed up by the things the war forced upon them. Besides, after what Zuko said about his home life, they'd surmise that anyone who has Ozai for a father deserves all the compassion they can get.

Would they have some issues to work through and boundaries to establish? Yes.

Would it go the way it did in the comics? I don't think so.

Honestly, I think it would depend on Azula. If she takes the initiative to reach out, Team Avatar would do what they can to help her.

"Is she capable of that, though?"

Uh, yeah. That moment when she asks Ty Lee for advice with flirting in "The Beach" was played for laughs, but think about what it says about her: Azula is willing to ask for help learning to connect with others in a healthier way. Azula is willing to do the work, even if it seems "shallow and stupid." She's willing to change the way she typically interacts with people. She doesn't want to use fear to control people. But she doesn't know any other way to keep people from abandoning, betraying, or hurting her.

By the end of the show, she's desperate enough to try asking for help. That's the biggest and most important step she can take. Given the target audience of the show, "Being strong means asking for help when you need it" is a vital lesson for kids and teens.

Azula wants to change. She just needs someone to show her the way, be patient with her, and encourage her to keep trying.

*Aang was fully prepared to try baby pictures and happy memories to make Ozai good again. I don't doubt for a second that he'd extend an offer of friendship to Azula.

[cryinginthesewers]

The NYC Ninja| headcannons

Before i get all these character info posts out, I wanted to share some mood boards I made and headcannons I have for everyone in The NYC Ninja.

So…enjoy I suppose…

Leonardo

God literally such a mother

Will tell on his brothers if they misbehave in school

“Sensei! You’re never gonna guess what Raph said at school today”

Loves his brother fiercely and would kill for them

(has killed for them)

All of the Hamato Clan members that aren’t related to him are afraid of him

They’re scared of Raph, don’t get me wrong, but they are shit-your-pants afraid of Leo

Leo doesn’t know this and tries to befriend everyone

Eventually he just figures no one likes him

He’s wrong, they really do respect him

He was the first person Mikey came out to

Actually, he’s the first person everyone came out to

In all honesty, Leo isn’t a great student

He gets C’s and B’s in all his classes

But that’s okay, he’s gonna have to run a clan later in life

Grades don’t really matter

Raphael

Such a simp!!

He sees a hot or pretty girl anywhere and he goes nuts

His brothers make fun of him for it

But literally such a great friend

He will sit down with you and talk about your feelings

But, you have the achieve level 10 friendship with him to be able to do that

Anything below - he will call you a baby for expressing emotions

Also the best singer of his family

Along with that, he takes choir as an elective

But if you make fun of him for it he will kill while singing sweeny todd within a blink of an eye

He’s the only one of his brothers to have ever been in Japan (and remember it)

He travels there often for the clan

Speaking of clan members, whoever fights him and wins has the highest bragging rights

No one has been able to do that

No one has ever challenged him either

Donatello

Lowkey is fascinated by drag

And ballroom culture for that matter

The most literate on queer history

Is a mod of many queer discords

And you know those discord’s are hoping

Literally loves school

He’s in all AP classes and has a 4.0

Dreams of getting into MIT one day

Makes sure the Hamato Clan has the best tech

When he’s not working with electronics, Donnie is designing his own clothes

Such an incredible fashion designer

Mikey constantly pushes him to pursue that route

“D, there’s so many schools here you could study fashion!” “It’s just a hobby!!”

The only one of the brothers to not enjoy comic books

They’re unrealistic in his opinion

Will try to bake for any occasion and always fails miserably

Michelangelo

Is transmasc

Often forgets to take off his binder because he forgets he’s wearing it

Will go with Raph once he turns 18 to get no less than 3 piercings

Already has is belly button pierced but Splinter doesn’t know

Thanks Donnie

The only one to have his ears pierced

Literally so good at making spreadsheets

It helps him focus and calm down

He could spend hours making the perfect spreadsheet of how many weapons the clan goes through each quarter

Also surprisingly good at managing finanaces

Probably because of the spreadsheets

He is the best at negotiations right after Leo

When he’s not doing admin for the clan, he will be making his own comic books

Head over heels for his best friend

Loves the roleplay on discord

Literally so good at it his online friends expect him to be a writer someday

Can not hold a beat even if his life depended on it

Always get his skateboard taken away at school

Saratoga

Does not know groupchat ettiquate

Like at all

Will literally bombard the chat with memes at two am

Either constantly on her phone or won’t touch it for days on end

Can not cook to save her life

Often forgets specific words in a language and will describe it in the most round about way

“The painting people hang on walls but it’s not a painting it’s like a blanket but it’s thin and people think it’s pretty?” “You mean a tapestry?”

Will mix up her languages on the daily

One time made shirts for the clan that said “we’re invisible” in neon green

Everything she owns is green

Has tried to put make up on Raph and will do it again

Loves to meditate with Leo and ends up falling asleep half-way through

Is such a bad student like honestly

She argues with all her teachers and always forgets to turn in her work

Has never learned how to properly study either

[lunarflux]

"how could i forget the feeling of falling in love with you"

hwang hyunjin x reader

genre — drama!au

for @simp-alert

suggested background music: x

note: soooo i've been in a funk for a few months. i didn't expect people to still find my fics, so i'm very grateful. this fic has been in my drafts for a week or two, and the end originally was different because it mirrored the way i wanted my situation to end. after healing some more, i realized that this is the way it should end.

It had been a while. That was really all you could think to describe the situation you and Jinyoung had been through for the past few years. While your relationship was nearly perfect, life pulled him away, and it was just a matter of time before one of you moved on first. It wasn't like you expected him to wait because, hey, if he really was as wonderful as you thought he was - who wouldn't fall in love with him?

It was the part where he fell in love that made it so much worse. It was like seeing the possibilities of you two reuniting like some cheesy romance novel just burn away and float into the air.

While you two remained friends, this was the week you were dreading.

Jinyoung was moving back, and now it was time to face the beautiful demon you'd worked so hard to forget.

Checking your makeup and hair in the mirror, you thought you'd put little effort into your looks. This wasn't a date. Let's make that perfectly clear. This was simply two friends reuniting after not seeing each other for a few years. By now, you were comfortably single and not looking for anything anymore. Relationships were exhausting, but being in love with Jinyoung was a marathon.

You walked to the bar, peeping at your phone every now and then.

And there he was on the other side of the glass. He didn't look too different. His skin was just as clear though his face looked a little slimmer. Somehow his hair still looked the same despite the time away.

Taking one step towards the door, you hesitated. Truly, he was there. But suddenly, the years of realizing that you'd let yourself wait for someone who wasn't waiting for you came flooding back like a reality check. He was here waiting for you for the first time in years. Did it really seem fair that he didn't have to wait that long?

You took two steps back. It didn't feel right anymore. The daydreams didn't seem so sweet, and your brain went into flight mode.

"Oh - " You ended up backing into someone else. "I'm so sorry!"

The stranger steadied you with both hands and a warm smile. "It's fine - are you okay? You look a little in shock."

"I'm... uh..." You took one last look past the bar patrons. Jinyoung was still there. "I'm okay."

The handsome stranger nodded. "You sure? I've had a couple of beers, so I don't mind playing therapist if you need to talk."

You held up a finger with every intention of shutting him up. "Actually. Okay, fine. Let's talk."

"Let's talk." He nodded.

"If your girlfriend broke up with you because of work and said you two might get back together in the future -"

"Move on." He hung his head back with a cackle. "Move the fuck on."

"But -"

"Okay, fine." He held up his hands in surrender. "Continue. Why didn't you move on?"

"I didn't say it was me!"

"Okay, fine - why didn't your friend move on?"

"If she broke up with you and then dated someone else, but now she's back and she wants to see you - what would you do?"

Your for-the-moment companion's smile lessened, and he placed his hand on your head, patting slowly. "I'd realize that I'm being a fool. If she really loved me, she wouldn't have made me wait. And if I was smart, I would have known that no one waits forever. Yeah, shit happens. She might have been serious. But would I really have been able to get back to loving her the way I used to knowing she gave her love to someone else while I stood here and waited?"

You pushed passed the stranger, nearly knocking him over in the process. "I'm going home."

"Hey, wait - " He grabbed your arm. "Look, I'm sorry, I can be an asshole when I drink -"

"It's not you." You took a deep breath. "You're right. I'm being stupid."

Running his hand through his hair first, he held out a friendly gesture. "Before this conversation continues, my name is Hyunjin. I'm sorry you had to see me... not at my best."

"y/n. And don't worry, this isn't exactly my best look either." You shook Hyunjin's hand.

"Do you maybe wanna go for a walk?"

**

"So are you still in love with him?" Hyunjin walked slowly beside you, sipping on a strawberry milk.

Piercing the straw through your coffee milk, you shrugged. "Maybe. I don't really know. I thought seeing him again would make things fall into place, and it wouldn't have felt like I waited so long."

"What'd you like about him?"

"He made me laugh, and I felt safe."

Hyunjin poked your cheek. "Yeah, well, a good comic and a lock can do the same thing."

You pushed him away. "Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know. It's just hard to forget."

"What you liked about him?"

"How it felt to be so sure that I was in love with him."

Hyunjin stopped walking and sat down. The moon was full tonight, and it made your heart feel heavy. This stranger made the weight feel a little less like a burden.

"I remember that feeling." He sighed, laying his head back on the grass. "Though it's been a while, you don't really forget. It's like everything that ever stressed you out, every secret you kept under your collar - it all goes away. You're just happy."

You joined him, seeing the moonlight glistening in his eyes. "Are you a poet or something?"

"No, I'm just a romantic." He turned to face you. "I could say that right now being here with you is making me feel like I shouldn't need to drink. Or... that being here with you is making me forget about how awful my day was. How I wasn't expecting to bump into someone so beautiful yet sad."

Hyunjin's words put a bug in your throat, and you couldn't bring yourself to look at him. Turning your attention back to the moon, you just let him continue.

"You don't need to walk around with the perfect stranger to forget about him. You just need to move on."

"Easier said than done, isn't it?"

"Of course, it is. But feeling happy and feeling safe is something anyone - it's something I could give you."

You smirked. "Why - you gonna make me fall in love with you?"

Hyunjin turned one more time, his face directly above yours. His hand cupped your cheek. "Depends."

The scent of strawberry trickled down your cheeks. Hyunjin truly was the definition of a hopeless romantic. He was making your chest feel heavy and the world feel small.

"O-On what exactly."

"I'm ready to fall in love again. Are you?"