#but i rlly like the graphic thing i did so yeah

[tzuberry]

me, you, and the red bracelet

pairing gunwook + gn reader details red string of fate but not rlly (?) cw blood (not graphic), trip/fall wc 1192 read time 5 mins

note i hate this bruh i cba to fix it or anything i think the entire plot of this is what’s wrong with it it just doesn’t feel right.. unfortunately

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You never thought anything much of the red string bracelet your mother gave you on the day of your middle school graduation—just that it looked kind of stupid. Upon receiving it, at the unripe age of fourteen, you contemplated its purpose and why your mom couldn’t give you a shiny new Pandora charm bracelet as your friends’ parents did for them.

Nevertheless, as a relic of representation of your grandmother’s beliefs (as your dad had told you), it became difficult to take off… metaphorically. You couldn’t just disrespect a family member like that; especially one that had essentially raised you. So, the sort of odd-looking, entirely useless red string wrapped around your wrist had to stay just the way it was.

Over time, its significance, and the meaning of it, diminished in your point of view. No one in your family had taken the time to enlighten you on its real purpose, so in the end… what—who were you wearing it for?

“I think it’s cute,” your friend Eunah said one day. She had a stripe of frothed milk above her upper lip from drinking the cafe mocha she ordered, so it was hard to take her seriously. Still, it was clear what she was talking about; she slid the tip of her finger under the red string across your wrist, tugging on it slightly.

In the mid-afternoon of another unremarkable Saturday, you’d found yourselves at the nearest coffee shop to your building on campus. You had a lot of work to catch up on, and Eunah graciously offered to accompany you… but she ended up not much of a help. Additionally, she only got you wondering if you had a milk mustache identical to hers, seeing as you’d gotten the same drink.

“It’s alright,” you replied, letting out a deep breath as you continued writing with your free hand. “I’m thinking of taking it off one of these days.”

“Oh, come on,” your friend groaned. “It means something, you know,” she stated, tone almost defensive. Your best friend was big on myths, theories, and any kind of legend—she was probably about to regale you on another one, this time concerning the bracelet you wore daily. “Like, when you find your soulmate, the string will break—I’ve heard of it.”

You scoffed. “Yeah, okay.” You were never one to believe any of this, which is why you never did any of your own research regarding your red string. It’s stupid, and it looks stupid too.

“Fine. Don’t believe me then,” she said, amused and rolling her eyes. “Just… when it happens, at least tell me I was right. And that I told you so.” Eunah began to pack her things into her blue Herschel backpack, and with all your textbooks and notepads laid out on the table, you didn’t have the chance to notice that she…

She stood up, wearing her bag over both shoulders. “I’ll see you on Monday, [Name]. Text me when you leave later.”

“Mhm,” you passively hummed. “Text me when you get home.”

She nodded. “I will.” Then, she went out the door.

It’d been only a few minutes post-Eunah exit when you came to find that your advanced chem textbook was gone—just— poof. As if it hadn’t had a spot on the table earlier, as if someone had… oh. (As if someone had taken it.)

You dashed out of the cafe as quickly as you could, not minding the passers-by and their brief judgmental glances. You needed that book—your exam was on Monday. You couldn’t even begin to think about what you would do without it. And, sure, it wouldn’t have been the end of the world if you weren’t able to catch up to Eunah, but it was more convenient to chase after her now than to commute to her house or assign a delivery service to bring you your textbook.

It had just so happened when your friend came into view, you… tripped. Shit. At least your arms broke the fall.

You were so certain the palms of your hands were grazed and (a very tiny bit) bloodied—so much so that you concluded it would hurt to prop yourself up to stand. Luckily, although you didn’t know it at the time…

“You alright?” a stranger asked, extending help in the form of his hand reaching for yours.

Despite your better judgment, the first thing that came to your mind had unfortunately been: he’s really, really cute. And tall. He flashed you an awkward smile, which prompted you to wonder why until he shook his empty hand in front of you—a subtle reminder that you had yet to get up from the floor.

“Oh, oh—!” you gasped, taking his offer into grasp. (Not too tightly though. Your palm was still… bleeding.) Your eyes locked onto his wrist as he helped you back up, and it’s just then that you realized it: your red string bracelet is gone.

The boy laughed. “That was a hard fall,” he said, nearly giggling in… amusement at your misfortune. He had taken his hand back before you could even hope that your blood didn’t rub off on him. His smile dropped. “You’re bleeding.”

Your red string bracelet was gone.

Your red string bracelet was gone.

Your red string bracelet was... who even is this guy?

“Hello? Are you good?” He waved his hand ahead of your face.

“[Name],” he called out. How did he know your name? (Newsflash: it was on your ID.) “Are you good?”

With half your consciousness gone due to the sole premise of your bracelet disappearing, you’d lost the ability to lead any train of thought clearly. “What’s your name?” you semi-breathlessly inquired, tilting your head and raising a brow.

He pointed to himself and asked for clarification. With this gesture, you noticed that he wore the same ID lanyard as yours. “Me?”

“Yes.”

“Gunwook.” He smiled softly.

Could Eunah really have been right? You’d just met this guy, when—

“Gunwook, can I have your number?” ... Impulse took over the rationality in you.

He broke into the widest grin you’d ever seen. He let go of your hand, which you hadn’t remotely noticed he took ahold of again, and stared at you intently as he waited for you to open your phone. You didn’t have your phone on you.

With a shake of your head, he immediately understood and pulled a pen out of his pocket. “Got paper?”

That you did. Gunwook ripped it into two, gave you one, wrote his number down first, and then lent you his pen. He wanted your number too…

“Uh, here it is.” Passing the piece of paper back to him, you pursed your lips, and the corners of your mouth came up ever-so-slightly. “Thanks. I’ll, um, go now.”

You rushed away (briskly walking) from the echo of Gunwook’s voice, ringing out with the question: “Wait! How’s your hand?”

“Good!” you yelled back.

Fortunately, when you reached the cafe again, your belongings and coffee were left untouched. There, you fished out your phone from somewhere in your backpack and called Eunah right away, planning to open with the line: “You were right, and you told me so.”

[confused-alienated]

Pinky promise

Summary: Spooky has something to show Tyler.

Tw: GRAPHIC SELF HARM (Take care of yourself)

Notes: I wrote this a couple of days ago whilst half asleep. This is a vent fic tbh and it's rlly weird. I hope this does better on here bcs it got buried on Ao3. Enjoy!

Word count: 1,407

Link to the og fic here.

---

Josh and Tyler were having a sleepover. It had been a really nice night, in Tyler's opinion. Tyler knew that Josh would agree.

The two had ordered takeaway before settling onto Tyler's sofa and watching a film, Fight club. Josh had chosen since he had paid.

Although it was his favourite, Josh had quickly fallen asleep. They were barely halfway through the film when rimmed-red, too-large brown eyes blinked open.

"Josh?"

"Not Josh!" Spooky Jim grinned then nuzzled Tyler. Tyler would never get over how cuddly Spooky was.

"Hey, Spooks," Tyler pulled Spooky into his side. Spooky hummed happily. "We're watching fight club."

"Yay!" Spooky smiled, "I love this movie!"

"I know you do, Spooky."

The two had settled back down, Spooky Jim cuddled up to Tyler.

As the film ended, Tyler could feel himself drifting off. His eyes involuntary closed and he leaned into Spooky.

"Tyyyyler," Spooky drew out and shook Tyler awake.

"Yeah?" Tyler replied, grogily.

"I wanna-" Spooky giggled to himself softly. "I wanna show you something!"

Tyler ruffled Spooky's hair, "Uh-huh, let's see then."

"You can't- can't tell Josh though. Promise, otherwise I can't show you," Spooky shakily held out his pinky, "Pinky promise me, Tyty."

Tyler huffed, 'Tyty', that was new.

It was an odd request but Tyler figured that there were loads of things that Blurryface didn't want him to know. This couldn't be that different. Tyler decided that if it was dangerous then he'd tell Josh. Tyler locked his pinky with Spooky's, "Pinky promise, I won't tell Josh."

Spooky smiled wider than Tyler had ever seen. Tyler swore that if Josh smiled like that he'd tear the corners of his mouth. It looked painful. Tyler jumped when Spooky began shaking his hand, still holing onto his pinky finger. Spooky frantically bobbed their hands up and down with such force Tyler thought Spooky could've pulled his hand clean off.

Tyler placed his hand over Spooky's, "Alright, alright. Let's see what you have then."

Spooky beamed again. He shifted away from Tyler and fumbled with the button of Josh's trousers.

Okay..? That was a bit odd. Tyler ignored how Spooky angrily muttered about hating Josh's clothes and Josh in general.

Maybe Josh just got a new tattoo, or Spooky did, Tyler tried to rationalise.

It wasn't a tattoo.

Spooky's thighs were covered in scars. Tyler's stomach dropped and his blood ran cold. He placed a hand over his mouth to stop himself from throwing up.

"Aren't they nice!" Again with that smile.

Had Spooky done this or did Josh?

As if Spooky could read Tyler's mind he answered, "I usually get Joshie to do this. He doesn't love it as much as I do but I can forgive him!" Spooky chirped.

Tyler shuddered as Spooky ignored his stunned silence. Spooky pointed at a particularly thick scar. He thinks it's called a keloid, raised and pinky-brown against Spooky's pale thigh. It's surrounded by many others, varying in length and thickness. Tyler thinks it might be the longest.

"I did this one!" Spooky traced it up and down, "You should have seen Josh afterwards!" Spooky spoke quickly, he kept interrupting himself with his own laughter. "He was- was sobbing like crazy! He kept begging me to make it stop and of-of course I handed him a blade and control. You should have seen the blood, Tyty. It was so pretty."

Tyler could barely register what was happening around him. He was in shock. Spooky was sat right next to him, describing how he tortured Josh like it was his favourite thing in the world. Maybe it was.

The world felt fuzzy around him, Spooky's happy chirping being drowned out by the ringing in his ears. Tyler stared at Spooky's thighs in horror.

The scars. Spooky's thighs were covered, they criss-crossed over each other. There were faded, white lines, raised pink bumps, small scabs that had obviously been picked at, fresh, red lines and gashes and blood. Dried blood drowned Spooky's thighs. It flaked off as Spooky's fingers danced around his thigh.

Tyler barely came back to himself as Spooky removed Josh's phone case. Spooky fiddled around for a second before pulling out a small, silver blade.

Tyler's blood somehow grew colder, maybe he'd freeze from the inside out. That's how he was now, frozen.

"Watch this," Spooky mock-whispered, a hand cupped around his mouth. Tyler could only watch in horror as Spooky dragged the blade down his thigh. He traced over scars with the blade, cutting deeper and deeper and-

Tyler's body reacted faster than his brain could process. He gripped Spooky's hands, forcing them away from his leg, Josh's leg.

"Stop!" Tyler said too loud. He snatched the blade from Spooky.

Spooky frowned, "Why? Do you want a turn? It's okay you can use my blade, Tyty!"

Tyler's stomach flipped, "N-no. I'm alright, thank you."

"Oh," Spooky said darkly, "are you... Jealous?"

"What!?"

"You're jealous of me," Spooky declared, "Don't worry though, I can help you!"

Tyler gasped and swiftly pocketed the blade, "Oh- Oh my-!" He turned and leaned over the edge of the sofa, vomiting onto the floor.

Tyler coughed a few times and wiped his mouth, he was vaugly aware of how Spooky was staring at him. His too-large eyes burned holes into Tyler's back.

"Can I have my blade back?" Spooky asked plainly, "Unless you want to use it?"

Tyler answered by throwing up again.

"Alright," Spooky muttered. Tyler shakily turned around to face him. He stared at Spooky's leg. Blood was steadily dripping down it, Tyler could only watch as the blood binded with the fabric of his sofa.

Spooky studied Tyler's shaking form. Tyler was hugging himself with one arm, his other hand was firmly over the pocket that held Spooky's blade. He was panting, maybe he would be sick again? As he thought, Spooky traced the blood around on his thigh.

A look of realisation passed on Spooky's face, "Oh, I get it," Spooky said in a sickly sweet tone, "You don't like blood. I'm sorry, Tyty. Blurry was exactly the same when I showed him." Spooky looked disappointed, Tyler thought he was going to throw up again.

"Yeah," Tyler struggled out, "Yeah, I don't like blood."

"Awwh," Spooky frowned, "I'm sorry, Tyty. I'll just show the scars next time." Spooky placed a bloody hand on Tyler's upper arm. He ignored how Tyler shivered under his touch.

Tyler's ability to speak had abandoned him again but Spooky didn't seem to mind. He happily yapped about blood and Josh and Blurry.

Blurryface.

Spooky said that Blurryface didn't like this either. Tyler knew that lately Blurryface had lost his lust for Tyler's blood. He reflected on how Blurryface had stopped telling Tyler to hurt himself. Recently, they had been cooking and Tyler had sliced his finger open on one of the knives. Blurryface had disinfected and wrapped the wound with confidence. He had tended to wounds before... Spooky's wounds.

Spooky was slowing down, leaning heavily into Tyler. Tyler became painfully aware of just how late it was.

"Come on," Tyler shakily spoke, "Let's clean you up, yeah?"

Spooky nodded, "Okay! Usually Blur does this for me but I guess he's asleep right now, isn't he?"

Tyler nodded, not trusting his voice, and pulled Spooky to his feet. He led him to his bedroom and pulled out his make-shift 'self-harm kit'. He hadn't had to use it in so long, the majority of the plasters were expired.

The clean up was quick, Tyler tried and failed to not pay too much attention to the way the congealed blood felt under the wipe as it clung to Spooky's leg hairs. The fresher blood felt smoother, slick, as the wipe absorbed it. Tyler pulled out a disinfectant wipe.

"This is gonna sting," he weakly warned.

Spooky hummed then hissed when the wipe made contact with the wound.

"You're not as gentle as Blurry," Spooky whined.

"I know, I'm sorry. I don't usually do this," Tyler finished up then gently tapped Spooky's leg, "all done."

"Thanks!" Spooky pulled Tyler into a bone-crushing hug.

Tyler was firmly pressed against Spooky's chest. No- not Spooky's, Josh's. Tyler's cheeks burnt red. Tyler decided that he would deal with his feelings later. He wrestled Spooky into a more comfortable position, letting Spooky get comfortable in his side.

Spooky's breathing evened put a few minutes later. Tyler breathed a sigh of relief.

Tyler didn't sleep that night.

[borom1r]

2, 3, 7, 8, 9, 12, 14, 18, 20, 22 for lotr from the violence ask meme 😈

OK i have answered 2 already but lets do this thing fuck yea (thank uuuuuuuuuu!!!!!)

3) screenshot or description of the worst take you’ve seen on tumblr

look its not really a "take" but the amount of people who just post variations of "I don't like Boromir, he's the worst" IN THE BOROMIR TAG is genuinely insane to me. like have ur (incorrect) opinion but keep it out of the tag worstie

7) what character did you begin to hate not because of canon but because how how the fandom acts about them?

uhhhh no one thank the gods. ive always disliked Denethor Because of canon. but i will say stumbling across the file index of an old LotR fansite + clicking on files w/ no preview only to find graphics thirsting over Denethor did cause massive psychic damage lmao

8) common fandom opinion that everyone is wrong about

idk 😭 i dont interact w/ the broader fandom really. i do find the way ppl reduce Pippin to Just a joke character in fanon insufferable tho

9) worst part of canon

BOOK!FARAMIR + HIS MIDDLEMEN SHTICK MY WORSTIE.

also ngl i do find the Aragorn/Arwen romance....... Weird. like I'm far from averse to "love at first sight" so long as it comes with the recognition that it's really more infatuation + true love takes work. and there's the fact Aragorn fell head over heels for an image of Lúthien, and Arwen's heart did not turn towards him until Galadriel dressed him up in elven finery. not to mention she was "not yet weary of her days" when Aragorn dies + has to die "whether I will or I nill" like she. wastes away? slowly alone in Lothlórien.

like idk [Aragorn kinnie voice] that's my sister, man but all that aside I do think.. Arwen deserved better? I like that the movies made her more active + I do wish she'd actually been there at Helm's Deep bc it would've been fun to see her and Éowyn bond but yeah. the vibes were off with that whole situation imho

12) the unpopular character that you actually like and why more people should like them

huh. does Théodred count? i feel like he's kind of a blank slate so fandom can just kinda run wild with him but i do genuinely enjoy writing him + find that there are solid implications for at least a friendship between him + Boromir (if not more). i mean, Boromir got a Rohirric shield from someone

14) that one thing you see in fics all the time

ok th implication here bein its sth that bothers me which thankfully i pretty much only read Aramir or Faramir/Éomer fics soooo theres not much??

i think the only things that RLLY get to me + they aren't THAT popular trope-wise (or ive been rlly good at avoiding them lmao) are fics that 1) make Boromir overly aggressive or 2) completely woobify Faramir

+ tbh the Faramir one bothers me more actually. that is a grown ass man and captain of the rangers of Ithilien.....................

18) it’s absolutely criminal that the fandom has been sleeping on…

HRM. again idk :3 <- blissfully not interacting w the broader fandom + only interacting w/ ppl w correct takes on Boromir + Rohan

(tentatively i need to start following more ppl i see some of yall in my notes + i shld follow. sorry im like a nervous dog u need to coax out from under the porch lol)

20) part of canon you found tedious or boring

side-eyeing my copies of the Histories. i need to finish those. eventually.............

22) your favorite part of canon that everyone else ignores

ignores?????? nothing i think (thankfully lmao) but i will say there is SO much detail in the films that it makes me INSANE. ik we literally just talked abt this in DMs lmao but i could sit n talk abt LotR costuming for fucking HOURS the films were SO stunning and the clothing alone reveals sooooooo much abt the characters i think its a super underrated vehicle for character analysis :3

[ask-the-six-human-souls]

💛 Spoilers for Undertale Yellow ahead! (If you don't want to be spoiled, don't read this!!) 💛

Alright so, I ended up playing Undertale Yellow for myself and I beat the pacifist route just now and...gosh...IT WAS AWESOME (And really sad ;U;)

Anyway, someone asked me what my thoughts were on the game and so I thought I'd make a post about the things I really liked about/thoughts I had throughout the game! Here we go!

First off, music and graphics were AWESOME I loved it all so much! New Home and some of the other areas were so memorizing to go through cause of just how beautiful the art of the game was! And the music was really catchy!

One thing that was really interesting to me about the game- I just be rlly bad at the battling system but- its the fact of how hard the pacifist run was. Like, in Undertale, the pacifist run was hard for certain bosses- but in Undertale Yellow I dreaded even running into some of the enemies because of how frustrating there bullets could be. The Guardener robot fight I did like probably 20+ times!! I was getting do frustrated at these things that I honestly almost thought about ruining my route and fighting these bosses/enemies to make it easier. Thats just interesting to me...especially with how many ppl have the same interpretation that the Justice soul fought and possibly dusted many monsters.

The ending was really surprising...but, it made lots of sense! I was totally expecting that Clover would fight Asgore...but he didn't. It makes me reflect on Justin's backstory a lot...him and Clover went to the Underground for the same reason, but, unlike Clover, Justin was kinda already blinded by anger halfway through...he realized his purpose for going down there was in vain, just like Clover had, but, he had no one to keep him calm or 'distract' him like Clover had. Unless you count Chara but...yeah...

I'm really glad they added that message at the end..."You hear someone cry for help. You answer their call." I assume thats a reference to the Flowey fight and it makes me happy that added that in. :3

Thats all the thoughts I can think of rn...but feel free to ask me about my thoughts on things I might have missed. I've done no secrets, and I haven't done the genocide route yet, but I plan on it like...possibly right now. Rip...just when I got the good ending...

I might make a post when I finish the genocide route, but we'll see!!

[whybrainwhy]

I love how American action Graphic Novels (Comics) are like:

OMG big green dude! Look it's it's a rich white furry here to save the day! Look this alien who conveniently is also a normal dude except the sun gives him the ability to jump rlly high and lift really heavy things (but we're gonna make him fly later on and give him some laser vision, oh yeah did I mention he was a rich dude?). Oh look the people that just casually mutated one way or another and they're here to save the day!

Whereas Korean action Graphic Novels (Manhwas) are like:

Lol the worlds ending, everyone's dying, did I mention there's a tower of multiple different worlds? Oh yeah also the stars are big mad and love watching humans die. Btw your physical attributes have been put into a video game system so now you have a numerical representation of just how shitty you are, but don't worry no one else has the ability to get stronger like you do because you played/read/whatever this game/novel/LN/Manhwa/webtoon despite it's inherently sadistic flaws and know everything about it despite everyone else deciding it was garbage. Congrats your "unique" tastes lead you to becoming the protag. Also you're the only one able to combine and steal skills from other players and you'll end up fighting a demon lord and literal. Fucking. Gods to save humanity from complete and utter extinction. Good luck! lololololol

[cogbreath]

ngl even tho i had faith in both you and allah that whatever you had done would not be the end of you i WAS worried still so yeah like everyone else is saying i'm also rly glad that you're recovering. congrats on surviving life's bullshit yet again my friend. may the next one maybe be less painful tho bc that did/does not sound like a fun time

jazakallah khair ❤️

and i do wanna apologise for worrying you guys. we all do know that i didnt mean to but i do understand how even when we r aware of that, it can still hurt and be scary to see someone u care about end up in a situation like that and it can be confusing and frustrating cuz of the fact its so clearly not a good thing to do to oneself. but im rlly rlly thankful that despite all that you guys have it in your hearts to be so so gentle and kind to me which seriously means the world to me

im not entirely sure how bad my situation really was, because it's honestly difficult for me to remember how much i actually ended up drinking, my memory is rlly blurry about it but i do know that i did pass out for a while. i wasn't exactly worried at first that i felt that i needed to puke and legit was shocked when i started seeinf it turning red n shit. i wanfed to believe that somehow it was just something i ate that was also red but when i started tasting the taste of iron i Knew. because it seemed to be becoming more and more bloody i was like. "o fuck." i was still aware of ans believing in the resilience of the human body, reminding myself that people have literally survived getting hit with a particle beam in the head, but nonetheless it doesnt change the fact that vomiting blood is something associated with fatal outcomes. i guess honestly it really doesn't matter either way what the true severity of it was and i shouldn't trouble myself too much about trying to figure it out because no matter what, it was a dangerous and bad situation to be in. also im not detailing more now about what happened so as to be shocking or graphic but like i just want to be honest about it so i can help process it and help u guys have more clarity on what happened now that im not as delirious and panicked as i was when it all went down

i wasnt scared to die and honestly no matter what never will be because of the way my brain is wired about the concept of death, but what i was most scared of was that ppl i care about and that allah would be mad at me. so it helps a lot to have that affirmed that nobodys mad at me and nobody thinks that i'm stupid or had it coming

sorry if this is more than u expected as a response, but you guys are some of the only people i can feel comfortable being truly deeply honest with. i dont ever intend to trouble you with things that arent your job to manage and i dont intend to freak people out. but maybe thats not nice to assume thats what anyone is thinking. ily

[evermeant]

okay guys here is my rambly notes post for episode 3 of the bear!! these are becoming more and more unhinged as I go

carmy looks good (yet again)

okay listen can we just say what a slay it is that he is actually going to therapy. we make jokes about our meow meows needing therapy and here is carmy actually going.

also at some point I rlly want to make a list and scrub through screenshots so I can see what they all are. I need to know!!! but I love every single one of them hee hee

watching a show and being like “I want to make graphics based off of this scene” is kinda wild

anyways. cut from mention of abuse and not only allowing it to happen but unintentionally allowing it and then it cutting to the kitchen and how this is all yelling and screaming and fighting and it sucks!!! I just want to fight literallh all of them

carmy and his ptsd. one day I will go into this. but the thing he loves being a constant reminder of everything that has hurt him. the flashbacks to watching everything in the New York kitchen. AND the fact that he can fucking …. Recite every single aspect of it …. I fucking love him so much

Okay as someone who works small business the fact that the phone is always ringing in the middle of every conversation kills me. It’s so accurate

carmy being so focused on changing the chemistry. on how he can’t yell at everyone everyday. the fact that he is trying so desperately to not become what New York was!!! I also just like. I wonder if Mikey fostered some of that anger? was that why he kicked carmy out?????

there is just something about how he is so desperately trying to avoid what happens in episode seven and. yes I’m a carmy stan but I do not think all of episode seven is carmy’s fault in the fact that. episode seven is everyone recognizing how truly awful their dynamic is and that is the moment they all realize it can’t keep going and part of that is because they break carmy

carmy saying Michael wasn’t there instead of saying he’s dead :(( whatever. I want to

ok carmy get some more therapy !!!!!!

something something about how everyone is kind of pretending things are okay and dealing with Mikey being gone by doing the same things they did when he was alive because Mikey was never really there anymore anyways (all he did was isolate)

I want to kiss Carmen on the mouth !!!!!!!!!

I forgot he actually goes back to therapy this episode when he has his panic attack. Absolutely bizarre to watch a show where someone attempts to take care of their mental health

sydney …. I love you so dearly

I want richie’s gender tbh

won’t lie the lack of Richie this episode smh….. he might be my second fave behind carmy. I mean I love literally everyone on this show but !!

Something abt the unintentional ways that people hurt each other in this show. Hmmmm

“you kinda let everybody act like trash” yea …… Yeah … carmy

the whole conversation that Sydney thinks that this place could be different from everywhere the both of them have been. The fact that carmy doesn’t know how to listen??? Has anyone ever listened to him. Did Michael ever really listen??? SOMETHING SOMETHING.

I really like that this show is ultimately about communication. And how it’s not specifically about fixing people and their problems but about how much can change if people just communicate and think about each other a little more and this episode rlly shows that

[celestialvexation-arch]

So I know you’re a fan of Silent Hill 4 (which excellent taste, btw 👌👌👌) but what’s you’re general opinion of the other Silent Hill games?

okay, long story short --

sh1: 8/10 -- it's on good ol' janky ps1 so the controls and graphics aren't the best, but holy shit....the atmosphere. the sheer question of wtf is going on is astounding

sh2: 9.5/10 -- easily the greatest. the story itself gripped me so hard along with the symbolism and imagery of the entire way. the only reason why it ain't a perfect 10 is cause it's just a dead horse getting beaten so damn hard. easy way to make money by putting pyramid head in or something ;;

sh3: 9/10 -- this whole game explores ( the horrific side of ) motherhood and femininity, and it's just.... oh god, it's so good. it continues from 1, and you couldn't have done it better with closing the story on a set of characters than this

sh4: 7/10 -- sighs. there is so much i could talk about this game.... they had the ideas; they had the potential!! if only it wasn't / felt so rushed. the one thing i'll give it that the previous 3 didn't have is that eerie feeling to it. that dream-like feeling where you're aware that you're dreaming but you can't "open your eyes" or bring yourself out of it

sh origins: 6/10 -- i mean, it's aight. i didn't delve that much into it to rlly get a solid opinion on it but the general feeling of an entry that's the prelude to it all? yeah, it's alright uvu

sh homecoming: 4/10 -- naaahhh. it's....well, it rlly did show the sheer contrast between old and new entries. if you're looking for a game to pass the time, this is a good one to settle on. i think this is where they don't expect new sh players to know what silent hill rlly is too, so they just threw in whatever to see what sticks

sh downpour: 5/10 -- ditto. well, the idea of silent hill shifting into a larger town, almost to a small city is interesting since times are changing, and the environment can reflect on that. the whole theme about revenge tho..... idk, it's pretty generic in terms of that. the usage and imagery of rain is cool tho!

i didn't rlly care for shattered memories, book of memories, or short message, sorry 😔

[smireyac]

hey hey hey it's that time of year again 🎇

oh look an emoji in the title... nature is healing

so it's 9:30... 2023's been... alright, ig? like it feels like things are finally getting back to "normal", whatever that looks like right now... i stopped wearing a mask this year, long after most people ik already did (though considering SOMEONE in this house has covid right now, maybe it's time to buy more kn95s...) and i didn't feel debilitating anxiety being in a crowded indoor space so that means something, right?

once again, these last couple months haven't been so great, personally or globally, and with 2024 being an election year, the state of things feels... uncertain to say the least...

but we're here to look back, not forward (not yet anyway)! SO according to my goal list last year, did i accomplish much?

read 12 books? ✅ i read 20 actually! and not one of them was a graphic novel! ok i lied, ONE of them was a graphic novel but the rest were novel-novels! sure most of them were romance novels but that doesn't take away from the fact that i surpassed my initial goal so!! hooray 4 me 😁

write more? ✅ well, not more than last year but i think keeping up with writing anything still counts !! and i published another fic so!! hooray 4 me 😁

apply to transfer to university? ✅ hell yeah i did !!! and because I'm poor i got 4 free apps to UC and CSU schools!! i applied to UCSD, UCI, UCLA, UCSB, SDSU, CSUSM, and CSULB! i'll get responses back in mid-march/april... i don't wanna get my hopes up for anything... but i am excited to go to actual university, even if it won't be like my peers/the movies... yk bc im a transfer and i'll be 26 by the time i'm actually attending classes instead of a bright-eyed 18 year old, ready to take on the world... we'll see... i'll make this my extremely goofy movie moment if i have to lmao so!! hooray 4 me 😁

do stuff with friends? ✅ while i didn't do all the things i mentioned, most significant things i did this year were with friends!! i went to NYC with remi, and went back to little tokyo with annie and gnat so!! hooray 4 me 😁

make new friends? ✅ i did!! make at least one new friend 😊😊😊 and im very glad for it so!! hooray 4 me 😁

all major goals accomplished!!! ✅✅✅✅✅

hooray 4 me!!! 😁😁😁😁

also of the movies i mentioned that i was excited for, the only one i still haven't seen is the transformers movie lmao 😆 i will eventually

speaking of movies,,, i want to be more into movies this year 🤔 like i watched a number of awards season contenders this year and i kinda wanna be able to make my own oscar predictions this year? I'm also toying with the idea of defending my "movies of all time" list on letterboxd 🤔 (i say toying bc i literally just came up with the idea yesterday lmao) im putting this in writing bc if i don't then it makes it easier for me to not follow through on them, yk? also i have no idea what that "secret writing project" i talked about last time even was lmao

this is all related to my latest existential crisis re: what i wanna do with my life lmaoooo (when aren't i tho frfr) like going to university is the next big step in my life right? and when i tell people that i'm getting an English degree (tho i should rlly start saying literature now) the first thing they all ask is "oh do you want to be a teacher?" which is a HUGE pet peeve of mine because no!! i don't wanna be a teacher!!! that's not the only reason someone would get an English degree!! not that there's anything wrong with teaching, i just don't feel like i... have the right temperament? (tho if i'm being honest, i do have a fantasy of taking over as the film strand teacher when pike retires [but i think that's happening this coming year so that fantasy will remain a fantasy lol]) most recently, i've started saying i want to be an editor but even that feels like a commitment to something idek if I'll be able to achieve (am i commitmentphobic? more at 11) so like !! then what ??? i could try to go further up in the library ? go for a leadership position ??? its stable it has health insurance and a pension... smart things to keep, things i shouldn't disregard frfr i could have a CAREER with the library... but at the same time, i'm like... do i wanna get stuck here? like me and brenden were talking once about how long some of the people working at the library has been there and how most of them are tired and burnt out and

like what if i want to do something else?

my initial plan was to stick with the city for 10 years so i could qualify for the pension and they i might be able to do smthg else with my life while having that pension for later on and who knows? maybe i'd feel like coming back to library when i'm older and wiser??? since i've been here 5 years i thought i just needed 5 more TURNS OUT the 10 years only counts when you became BENEFITED and it only COUNTS YOUR WORKING TIME so even tho i've been here 5 years, im only like 8 months into this pension bullshit bc i got benefits a year and a halfish ago and IM ONLY HALF TIME!!!!!!

[sigh]

so idk!! shit's weird and idk what im doing!! i'm gonna go to school for literature and see what happens while i'm there; i hope i won't have to quit my job but i also wonder what it would be like to go to school full-time, like god intended... i've also considered master's and doctorates but like i feel like i shouldn't worry about that until i at least get through the bachelor's lmao 😆

i could go on (and i might tmrw tbh) but it's also 2am and i haven't even gotten to my goals this year

SO GOALS:

🎇 so first things first: we're keeping up the reading goal! we'll raise the stakes to 20 books since i know i can do that now

🎇 other goal related to reading: i want to read some non-fiction books this year; specific items include kitchen confidential, what we don't talk about when we talk about fat, and any/all of the miami history books i've checked out from the library b4

🎇 ik that my life will get very busy when i get to university so I'm hesitant to have a lot of stuff "to do" but i thought about trying to learn a new skill, specifically blender? bc im obsessed with bigtop burger lmao bc idk i still love animation and it just sounds fun!!

🎇 watch more movies? to do the awards szn thing? like im gonna try for the golden globes in fIVE DAYS? SHIT... well if not the globes then the oscars for sure but man... here's a secret career dream hidden in a goal: film critic? i think that's cool but like what does that even mean for me lmao ANYWAY WATCH MOVIES

i just wanna see where life takes me this year

maybe i'll figure some shit out along the way lol

happy new year babes 💖🍾🥂🎆

EDIT: I HAVE MORE GOALS I MIGHT WANT TO SET

🎇 make a content ? oooo scary ik we hate the word content but i feel like im finally confident enough in myself that i don't feel the excuse "im not good enough" is valid anymore? And sien has been asking to for forever and i think i was supposed to help her do it for her birthday ?? So ive been LACKING lmao

🎇 DM a DnD sesh frfr you've been wanting to for years but u always chicken out bc ur scared well ur reblog all those posts do it scared right? DO IT

🎇 go out to events ? like the poetry reading u were invited to and like u see those posts on insta so like maybe go to them? andMAYBEtrythatspeeddatingtypething???MAYBE.....

[lostacelonnie]

The dreaded time returns once again. I hope your first day back wasnt bad. Oh hell yeah peak fuck it we ball right there. & its always nice to have the support system. Oh yeah mt fuji is on my list too i wanna see it. Also id love to see the native birds. Love seein different types of birds. Oh okay words not commonly used bein dropped got it. Occasionally annoying is like the catchphrase of the english language. Oh yeah big same 80 is like my max comfort level for heat before it becomes unbearable. So 42c was like death it sucked so bad. Thanks! I also finally got through jarilo-vi story & playstation beta version opened to test so hopefully soon ill be able to play there. Mobile is hard to play on. Very nice i should check out rain world see what its like. I need to set aside time to draw its a relaxing hobby. I feel that i keep dropping games for a bit. Now that im all caught up on genshin again im trying to play more dredge & river city girls. Maybe even beat them. I wish you luck in your minecraft quest. Fair enough. I get along okay with my half sister but not enough to like. Tell her things. Oh hell yeah congrats on the dye job done. Always feels good. Yeehaw new game mode. Star rail is doin good at havin fun & interesting side stuff to do really. I got so many facts about fish & birds & such in my head at all times but can i remember all of them all the time? No. Such is life with adhd

it really does. but hey i survived the first week AND made friends with the cool alt girls from my class so its not ryover 👍and yeah i was. actually quite surprised how chill my mom is with me being queer but im not complaining. and yeah definitely!!! i dont rlly know a lot about birds but i agree its always nice to see them. and yeah isnt it!!!! tho Being Polish kinda desensitized me to languages being annoying since it is like that as well. while i do operate my mother language quite well, i cannot remember a Single grammar rule ive ever learned. just freestyle it and hope for the best. what the fuck is a przydawka. and ough congrats on surviving that then. im going to alicante with my school pretty soon [mightve mentioned this but i dont remember?] and from what we know its going to be like 25c there and like. damn. here i was getting happy about not having to deal with the heat until the next vacation. but Whatever. AND AHH THATS NICE!! id love to hear ur thoughts on the story i honestly Really like the jarilo vi arc. mobile IS hard to play on. survive out there. RAIN WORLD IS SO GOOD OMG THE GRAPHICS AND STORY ARE AMAZING AND ALL THE DIFFERENT SLUGCATS ARE SO FUN TO PLAY AS...... and ah good luck with that!! i have a little less time now that school is back but ive been trying to at least doodle every day. and ooh i dont recognize either of those, tell me ab them!! i did the genshin archon quest and havent logged in since but it was very fun. excited for the next part. and thank you o7 ill keep you updated on that. and yeah i feel you on that i have a pretty similar relationship with mine, its just that we rarely ever talk. AND THANK YOU!! im probably gonna repeat it soon since, as i said, dye doesnt really like to cooperate with me so its basically gone by now but at least i know this dye stays for at least a bit. i havent played star rail recently aside from the main quest tbh, didnt really have the motivation to do it i guess. BUT i heard the new simulated universe is fun so ill probs check it out Eventually. and yeah it really IS like that

[alectocxarrow]

Slytherin OOC Questionaire: ELLA EDITION 

1. What did you want to be when you grew up?

So in kindergarten there was a time when I really wanted to become a train conductor, then for a whole while I wanted to become a vet. Both things were out of the question for me at about age 13 though and I started not really knowing what I wanted to be. For quite a while (and honestly up to date) I wanted to become an actress because I just freaking love to act.

2. Where did you meet your best friend?

In school, during a Latin lessons to be more precised. Freaking hated her at first because she instantly became besties with our teacher, whom I also freaking hated. Now we live in different cities, which sucks but whenever we meet it’s like we were never apart.

3. What is your greatest achievement?

Uhm, are you trying to embarass me? Idk, I’m proud of every production of a play I was ever in, so definitely that. Otherwise I haven’t done that much yet so well…

4. Somebody you aspire to be like?

Every kickass woman out there who is living life in their own way and being happy and kind and supportive okay. This answer is true but also I can’t come up with a specific person right now so there is that too. 

5. Are you a birthday person?

100%! I love my birthday, but only if I get to spend it with my family, if I do though I have to get there attention for the entire day and everybody has to do stuff to make me feel good. Last year I had the saddest birthday ever because I had to work for 8 hours, where nobody even acknowledged it was my birthday and after I was just so tired I pretty much went straight to bed.

6. What is your dream job?

A wish I had for a while was to become a human rights lawyer and up to date I still would love to be able to work for a NGO like Amnesty or Human’s Rights Watch or be a Diplomat, however that is a little out of reach, rip.

7. What are three things you want to do before you die?

I mostly wanna travel to a bunch of places and I want to be that one person who read a book on the matter once for one time in my life. So yeah, once more this question is way too deep and I don’t have a clue. 

8. Who is your favourite antagonist?

I often times love antagonists but I can’t decide right now. 15 year old me definitely wants me to say Katherine Pierce, who I also still love tbh. But also freaking Jim Moriarty in Sherlock, Cersei Lannister in Game of Thrones!! and Heath Ledger’s Joker, of cause. 

9. How different was your life five years ago?

So very different, I was sixteen and honestly it wasn’t a bad time for Ella. I had just gotten way more self-confident and basically started to note care about anybody who didn’t like me. I also thought I was about the smartest person in every room. Now that I think about it I was probably way more self confident than I am now.

10. If you were hypothetically stranded on a desert island, how long do you think you could last?

Like five minutes? I would probably just feel sorry for myself about that long and then die. I have zero survival skills.

11. Any unpopular opinions?

Definitely, a lot of them when it comes to politics since I’m rather left winged and also definitely a feminist. I also 100% believe that it’s crappy to talk badly about another person behind their back and I will tell you. 

12. Would you want to know when you’re going to die?

This would definitely be a yes. If somebody would ask me whether they should tell me I wouldn’t say no. Too many people die without being able to say goodbye beforehand. Since I’m not afraid to die I would just love to have that opportunity. I would also most definitely make my pre death day all about me and have a giant party okay. 

13. Do you ever take things from the hotel?

Never really in hotels so no, I guess. 

14. Biggest pet peeve?

When people talk badly about other people behind their backs #frontstabber. Also when people love to hear themselves talk... even though I’m probably one of those people but #whatever. 

15. Do you hold grudges?

No, actually. Or rather I will forgive you almost instantly but maybe if we have a fight again quite a while later I will bring it up. Which is an asshole move, I know but dude if you’re gonna do the same shit again I will fucking tell you.

16. Do you like the place where you grew up?

Yes, I absolutely loved it. I honestly had a great childhood and I always realize that over and over. My family is the best, I love my parents so much, we played outside with the neighbors children a whole lot, my father took us to cultural events every now and then. I read so much when I grew up. I have five siblings and we had a house at both places we lived and I loved both of those houses.

17. Would you kill someone if they were planning to kill you?

If it’s self-defense and absolutely the only thing I can do instead of dying, yes. If I know about it ahead of time and know their plan and stuff I will stop them from doing though without straight up killing them.

18. Three things you’re looking forward to?

Summer vacation, seeing my sister on Friday, the premiere of my current play in about two weeks. 

19. What would you be the god/goddess of?

Really dark fucking humor okay? Also discourse. Somehow today I’m never really sure whether words actually exist so if that is not a word I’m sorry. 

20. Where do you normally sit in the classroom?

In the middle somewhere, if it’s a good day in the front. 

21. Would you rather always be overdressed or always be underdressed?

Always overdressed, hello?! Probably because atm I’m poor af and therefore nearly always underdressed. 

22. Do you own anything that has been passed on to you by a family member?

Yeah, I have a couple of things that have been passed down to me by my mother and I also have something that has been passed down to me from my dad’s side of the family. 

23. What can you do today that you weren’t capable of a year ago?

Work with Stata, at least a little. Also some other stuff but I once again can’t think of anything right now, bye. 

24. What is something you want right now?

Muse to write mostly. Also I would love to live in a Sitcom at the moment. Don’t ask but it’s just a thing currently. 

25. Most slytherin thing you’ve ever done?

Oh well, I have a bad habit of lying my way out of things or just casually lie without any real reason. But the most Slytherin thing about me is probably that I really want to do something that changes the world and if I can’t achieve that I freaking don’t know what else to do with my life. I also often feel like I might be the smartest person in the room for no particular reason. 

[petrichorium]

went insane and did my own hcq relationship mapping inspired by @lorelune. i kept the graphic v simple but have v specific thoughts abt all ten relationships so massive rambling utc

Jing Yuan + Jingliu — this one is most clear in canon i think; they're master and student, with Jingliu being a pretty cold and distant master but ultimately a decent one. I think she's ultimately quite proud of him but she's a difficult woman to have a relationship with no matter the nature of it. one of my fav headcanons is that her keeping him at arms length is primarily why he's so adept at reading people; he was forced to learn how to read between the lines w her from the very start

Jing Yuan + Baiheng — the most prototypically "close" friendship of the batch. very big sister/little brother coded, w her being the person he rlly goes to for advice and def being his primary confidant. I think there'd be potential for him to have a one-sided thing for her but he just doesn't let it happen bc of Jingliu. i also rlly like the idea that he kind of emulates her as he's rising in the cloud knight ranks—lord knows he did not learn that charisma from the other three—but yeah. theyre v close.

Jing Yuan + Yingxing — this one goes through Many phases they're frenemies for a while and then that bickering sexual tension boils over and it becomes frenemies who regularly (hate)fuck........ until jing yuan accidentally drops a confession in the heat of the moment (fucking? fighting? both?) and Yingxing rejects him and it becomes this sopping wet awkward friendship full of yearning in both a platonic and a romantic sense but Yingxing is too much of a bitch to reach out. v much full of mutual respect and camaraderie the whole time theyre just both very bullheaded

Yingxing + Dan Feng — we all know it and love it. rlly loved lore's take that Dan Feng isn't aware that hes in love and Yingxing is so i'm running with that; it's this weird nebulous "involved" but theyre both too inept to rlly discuss it and that only makes it more volatile. Dan Feng thinks it's just normal friend stuff (this issue heightened by his other closest male relationship being homoerotic as well) and Yingxing is too busy kicking himself for falling in the first place.

Jing Yuan + Dan Feng — fuckbuddies but this time Jing Yuan knows better than to blurt out his feelings so instead he just suffers. It's mostly Dan Feng subconsciously looking to distract himself from Yingxing and Jing Yuan being well aware that's what's going on; theres some underlying feelings on Dan Feng's side but idk..... i just like this messed up love triangle where they're all into each other to some extent individually but Dan Feng and Yingxing r burning hotter and faster and more dangerously than Jing Yuan can keep up with.

Yingxing + Jingliu — longest slow burn of the bunch. they're both insanely prickly and eventually it evolves into being bitchy ass drinking buddies but that takes decades for sure. theres a mutual respect there that develops faster but the actual friendship is slow building

Dan Feng + Jingliu — they both are the highest "ranking" of the quintet i believe and have to do certain politics stuff that none of the others have to deal with (aside from eventually Jing Yuan, but thats long after theyre gone) so there's a certain bit of understanding there. def friends, tho theyre both quite stoic; not the kind to share their innermost thoughts but the kind to like silently sit in the same room doing paperwork PFFT

Yingxing + Baiheng — knew each other since Yingxing was a kid. he had this very intense hero crush on her for years until they met again and it hasn’t quite faded so...... weird messed up kinda-romantic mostly-platonic feelings (he is terrified of untangling that mess) ft a burning need to prove himself to her. she views him as a little brother type beat too; ultimately very close! almost as much as her and Jing Yuan

Dan Feng + Baiheng — deep mutual respect ft a bit of one-sided pining; I love the idea of him being kinda moony-eyed over her not treating him like a deified being, def a bit infatuated w her but it’s all mixed up in intense platonic love too at this point. she focuses on maintaining a friendship, rlly just isn’t much interested in him but does care for him deeply

Jingliu + Baiheng — ohhhhh here we go. insane psychosexual homoerotic female codependency time. theyre closer to a real relationship than Dan Feng and Yingxing but.......... Jingliu is cold and distant yet horribly obsessive and prone to jealousy, Baiheng is noncommittal/terrified of being tied down plus a bit frightened by just how intense her Thing w Jingliu is compared to other flings; its a Whole Mess ty

My interpretation of the high cloud polycule is SO insanely messy I’m realizing holy shit

[kiwisaurusrexx]

learning recently how money works has vastly improved my life as an adult like. i had an idea growing up but i never had any concept of what prices for stuff were, what was and wasn’t reasonable. been looking at stuff recently and learning that like. yeah a $20 t shirt is p much par for the course, i’m not terribly fussed over stuff like that anymore.

when i first had my own money before i got a proper job i would try and spend as little as possible bc that’s what my mom did and i didn’t have much to spend in the first place. idk if it was intentional teaching how to budget or if my mom was just Like That.

if it was trying to teach me, i don’t think i really learned anything. i saw sm was more than i could afford at the mall w the 20 bucks my mom gave me and moved along. i thought shit was expensive when it’s rlly p average for what it was. my mom rlly only shopped (and still mostly does) at thrift stores where she can spend as little money as possible and while yeah i get that and i also enjoy thrift stores, it’s hard to find myself and who i want to be or present off of whatever ppl decided to donate recently.

ive been buying my own things recently and i love it. not bc heehoo new items but bc i get to figure out what i like and what represents me most i guess. i tend to like graphic tees but not ones that overdo it with image detailings, i dont like long sleeves unless i can push them up, cargo pants are gods sent, i prefer more muted colors. i gotten myself some cool pants i like, some demon slayer shorte, an atla shirt, a ddlc shirt, i literally bought a destiny shirt earlier tonight and im so excited. i bought a fucking waluigi christmas shirt!! im finally figuring out how i want to present myself both as an adult and as someone who’s transitioning.

i love growing up and learning things ab myself but in the more mundane way. it feels like the personality details ab a book character that you’d fall in love with. i’m finally feeling real recently and it’s so. reassuring, i guess, that i do actually exist and i havent just been masquerading around this concept of me or how i want to be perceived. i can actually recognize why ppl talk ab me the way they do and i feel like i deserve praise when i work hard rather than just feeling terrible but not knowing why when i dont get the support i needed.

idk tldr im just happy im finally rationalizing money and figuring out who i am and how i want to present myself. things really are getting better and growing up is. genuinely pretty cool.

[lexacoolfox]

(I was about to ask you if you can do Nagito with an S/O who’s like Leviathan from obey me but since you don’t know the game, I will just describe his personality for you.)

So basically S/O is an otaku who usually spends most of their time on the internet and doesn’t usually talk to people unless if they really have to. They usually rant about whatever anime or game they’re interested in to their closest friends and they tend to use internet slang even if they’re speaking to someone (ex: “Someone go grab the popcorn lolol”) Despite them revolving their reputation around being an otaku, they don’t think very highly of themselves and is very insecure. Since Leviathan represents Envy in the game, S/O is also easily jealous and often talks about how “unfair” or “lucky” others are. They also like to invite their closest friends to events in video games. They are also a mix of shy and energetic since they have a lack of social skills but they also gets angry when they get jealous or ecstatic when they see something rlly cool happening.

I feel like that sums it all up, I hope the request isn’t too hard.

Thank you for describing the personality in such good detail! I can definitely work with this!

Nagito with a S/O like Leviathan.

You were known as the ultimate otaku! You spent most of your time on the internet. Had very pricey anime merch and manga. Your room look liked an anime paradise. You also played video games.

When you got accepted into hopes peak you weren’t the most excited. You were homeschooled mostly, you hated going out in public and being ‘social’. You were pretty awkward in public.

You knew you didn’t have to go to the school. It wasn’t necessary to attend. But your parents practically forced you to go. They threatened to take away your privilege to buy anime merch and manga for 4 months if you didn’t go. You couldn’t live that long without being able to buy the things you like. So you reluctantly went to hopes peak.

You arrived the first day and you felt extreme social anxiety. You sat in a chair and noticed a girl with a game in her hand. You saw she was playing (insert random game.) you actually really like that game.

“You play (game name)?”

“Yes. I do, I like the story and design of this game.”

“I must agree the story and design are pretty great. I personally like to play games with a story like Kingdom of hearts it’s one of my personal favorites, the first one was good and I like the second one. I can’t wait for the third.”

“I really like that game too. It’s such a fun story and the mystery behind it is so much fun. What’s your name? I’m chiaki nanami the ultimate gamer.”

“Oh I’m f/n l/n the ultimate otaku.”

“So you like anime and manga I’m guessing.”

“Yeah I do. I also don’t do to well with social interactions, unless I’m online. I honestly didn’t want to come but my parents would cutoff my ability to buy merch and manga. So I really didn’t have a choice.”

“You don’t seem to be too bad at interactions. I mean your talking to me just fine.”

“Well that’s because we’re talking about something I’m really into. Normally I have nothing to say that isn’t consider to most people as nerdy or geeky. Sorry for uh wasting your time, I going back to my desk.”

You sat back in your desk and pulled out your phone talking to your internet friends. When somebody walked next to you. You noticed but that’s all.

“Hello.”

You looked to see a boy with very white hair and a smile on his face.

“Uh hello…”

“I’m Nagito Komeada the ultimate lucky student! If I may can I know your name and ultimate?”

“Um I’m f/n l/n the ultimate otaku…”

“Oh wow! That’s mean you probably have a lot of anime merch and manga right?”

“Yes I do…Um…not to be rude…but is there something you need?”

“Oh no. I just wanted to know introduce myself even though you will probably forget trash like me.”

“Hehehehe well there’s something we have in common. I doubt you’ll remember a loser like me lol, Ugh it’s so unfair, I can’t believe I’m an ultimate for something so lame. There so many people with such better Ultimates.”

“What! If anybodies ultimate is lame it’s mine!”

“Yeah…totally… being super lucky is so much worse than a loser who just watches ‘cartoons’ and collects figures that super expensive all day.”

Before he can respond you pull out your headphones put them on and started listening to your favorite anime openings. You just wanted to go back home and play video games.

Throughout the day you overhead everyone’s amazing Ultimates, you couldn’t help but think you didn’t belong there. These people had all these amazing skills and what are you an otaku. After a while you walked out of the class and went to a hallway and looked out a window.

“Hey.”

You looked over to see Nagito.

“Oh hey.”

“What aren’t you in class with everyone else?”

“Cause I don’t belong in that class.”

“But your an ultimate!”

“So what. My ultimate is so boring compared to the others. I just want to go home and play video games.”

“What kind of games do you play?”

“Oh I play games with a story and good graphics. But I also like games that don’t have a plot like, Minecraft. It extends my creativity. I’ll also watch a random anime while playing. Normally if I’m playing the anime I put on is death note. It’s one my favorites no cap.”

“No cap?”

“Sorry I tend to use internet slang even in real life conversation.”

For the next hour or two, you mentioned the type of games you play, anime you watch, and some merch/figures you have. Nagito was mentioning a game you played very often, you told him that a event of the game was coming up. You invited him to join you and he agreed.

When joined in one the event, you sounded so much more happy and very enthusiastic. He got to see a new side of you, the both you had a quite a bit of fun. He even learned a bunch of new internet slang. (Even thought he probably not going to use it.)

You guys were now really good friends. You two just got along very well. You two would play video games, watch anime, read manga together.

When you two played games with each other online. Sometimes he glad he can’t see your face. Cause you get jealous and angry when somebody beats you. In public if your jealous which makes you mad. You silent rant on the inside of your head. But online, it’s like a explosion of yells. Nagito tries his best to calm you down when you get like that, he’s learned not to say ‘it’s just a game.’ Cause that just makes it worse.

You kinda developed on a crush overtime. You realized you liked him when he gifted you a manga, that you couldn’t get cause you got in trouble with your parents.

You didn’t know how to tell him. There was no way you could do it in person.

You thought how something cute and something he might like. He really enjoyed the game Minecraft. So on Valentine’s Day you texted him to join you in a game. You spent about maybe a week making the little Valentine’s Day confession.

“I know it’s not the most romantic thing in the world. I was also to scared to tell you in person…I really like you Nagito.”

“Aww s/o…this is so thoughtful of you. I really love it! It so you! I would be delighted to be your valentine.”

“Really! Wow! I’m just so…!! How about we meet up at our favorite cafe?!”

“Yeah that’s sounds great!”

You two went on Valentine’s date. It was great. You guys went on more dates after that, and soon became each other’s significant other.

A few relationship headcanons

He is the only one allowed to touch any of your expensive manga’s or merchandise.

You get so easily jealous of other people when they flirt with Nagito.

You and Nagito have anime marathons. Like a movie night but anime.

He loves to see your excited face when new merch for you favorite animes or a new/sequel to one your games comes out.

You and Nagito get matching anime outfits

Nagito also helps with your insecurities by showering you with compliments while also degrading himself. For example while you were saying how uninteresting you were. You told he could probably do better. he responded with ‘don’t say that, it’s amazes me that someone as worthless as me. Is given the privilege of calling someone as amazing as you my significant other!’

You also give him compliments and shower him with affection. You also do anime classics like a kabedon.

When you did do a kabedon he almost passed out by how flustered he got.

I really hope I got the character right! So komeada-simp37 if I got it wrong or wasn’t really what you were looking! Sorry! Anyway hope you have a nice day!

[moonrpg]

opinions on pokemon?

augh so many

I love pokemon so so much it was a huge part of my childhood. every gen except one I have like, a hands on experience with going back as far as I can remember.

with that said gen 8 was so so so disappointing. the push to churn games out so fast just makes me sad I never even finished it I’m literally at the champion fight rn as of like two years ago LOL. and arceus is super fun and refreshing gameplay wise but I have lots of other qualms with it haha. but I do like it a lot so far!!

but overall yeah I love those little creatures. I feel like most pokemon fans r either more fans of the animals or of the human characters and I’ve always been more drawn to the concept and designs of pokemon themselves although some of the ppl have cool stories and stuff too. obviously I dislike a fair amt of pokemon designs just bc there’s so many I can’t imagine anyone loves every single one but. honestly might be wrong on that one

my fav gen is 5!! Surprising nobody haha. I rlly think pokemon graphics peaked with the moving 2d sprites they just had so much charm and gf was really expanding on what they already did well. and the story is. augh I like it and my fav mon is reshiram so :) also the game was rlly fun to hack before they shut down the wifi thing haksbxkxhdkd but I rlly do love gens 2-7 each for their own special reasons (mostly various nostalgia reasons hehe). surprisingly I never really had a pokemon anime phase but I’ve seen a handful of the movies. anyways love it even though it makes me so mad sometimes. the pokemon Company frightens and vexes me so

[iravaid]

who are all your ocs 👉👈

I'm smooching u anon I'd Love to show you my ocs, omg hell yeah

everything below + some rough portraits of the ocs because i don’t have my graphics tablet with me rn

Lunchbox

The One, The Only

Steals from Abrams and LaCroix on a regular basis

Love trinkets and sparkly things, baby

Was actually made for my fic, We Don’t Have To Like Each Other to Survive This (wdh for short) but she’s long since become a recognisably unique oc, hell yeah

Tulma

Has gone through a redesign and am having a lot of fun with this one

From a vtm game a group of friends and I play off and on again

Is a sculptor that has a deal with the Ventrue leader of the local hospital for the ‘spare parts’ the morgue provides

they’re very pleasant don’t worry about the 12 fingers and the lamp made from pulsing skin. have some tea :-)

Inquisitor De Mer

motherfucker <3 so very very evil

From WDH, tortures Nines and does many other antagonistic things in pursuit of understanding the physiology of Kindred

Has a zweihander and is buff as all hell

Eventually Embraced by Andrei and becomes a scary reptilian looking Tzim, good for her <3

Prince Ophelia Thrysk

The Prince of Dover, and is from my fic, Diviner Bureaucrat (DB)

Is a GILF/MILF, is not very aware of it, Is very shady at times, good for her

Has a look in her eye like she knows something you don’t, intelligent, patient

Was born with a malformed leg and gets around with a brace and her ubiquitous snakeheaded cane

Her court’s colours are white and blue, like Dover’s white cliffs meeting the ocean.

Knew Malkavian!LaCroix’s Sire, Ziener. Is not happy about knowing him

Sheriff/Archon Aurelia Orsini

Was an Italian noblewoman sometime in the 15-16th century, realised she wasn’t rlly up for that and ran away, becoming a pirate.

Stoic, blunt, terrifying with a sword

Is Embraced into the Lasombra clan and eventually defects from the Sabbat because of Thrysk (she likes MILFS)

Is apart of Thrysk’s court when Malkavian!LaCroix joins it, teaches him how to swordfight, still despises him because he’s a little ratman

Becomes an Archon and is hellbent on ensuring Malkavian!LaCroix meets justice for what he did to her lover

Ziener (van Ardennen)

this fucker

rancid, smells of rot and covered in the old boils of the bubonic plague

Embraced sometime in the 14th century during the Black Plague: is Like That primarily due to the lingering effects of the disease on his mind and body, compounded by his clan

Instead of the Web, Ziener is primarily ‘connected’ to the moon and its primordial force: he believes he is given messages from the gods in his torpor and that he must spread said message and rear more seers who may hear their messages.

Other Malkavians will feel his ‘presence’ on the Web in the form of the moon’s presence: like staring at the full moon at full force. It’s not very pleasant

Genesis 4:8 <3

Templar Brynn de Leeu

Very short fuse, throws himself completely into a belief or task

Sire of Sabbat and WDH LaCoix, Andrei’s lover and wholly dedicated to the Tzimisce 

Was a Flemish knight with a wife and two boys. LaCroix resembles one of these boys, and Brynn thinks it’s fate that he Embrace LaCroix.

Eventually follows the Path of Honourable Accord, passing these beliefs onto those versions of LaCroix

Is a zealous believer in Ventrue being the shields of the Sabbat: their Fortitude is his proof and he essentially tortures LaCroix to increase his pain tolerance and improve his Fortitude

Is killed by the Society of Leopold: firebombed to death in an ambush, holds the hunters off while the majority of the pack get out

Foodtruck

SHE. 

Called Foodtruck because she hits like one <3

Very sweet, but will also rip your face off if you try anything

Originally doodled a concept of an aged-up Lunchbox but I loved it so much I made an new character from it

Protects the Warrens and clears the sewers of szlachta and other monsters/hunters

Doesn’t speak much, teeth and maladapted muscle, usually uses sign or text-to-speech to get messages across that typical gestures won’t

Embraced by Reremouse in the desert, somehow escapes and survives until she reaches LA

Intending for her to be a character in a potential Diviner Bureaucrat sequel

Nurse Freya

A Welsh Nurse from the 1980s who was Embraced by accident on a vacation to Los Angeles. Has been stuck in America since

Has nothing to do but doo what she knows: heal

Applies her knowledge in anatomy and biochemistry in mitigating wounds sustained by Kindred in fights etc - figures out that stapling a laceration shut means less vitae is used in closing it

Figures out how other injuries/infections affect Kindred (fungal infections, viral carriers, vicissitude, blood magic, poisonings, etc) and how to treat them effectively

Finds a safe place in the Anarchs, who desperate needed her expertise during the Kuei-jin and Sabbat conflicts. 

Something of a foil to De Mer: she’s stern but she’s also got a very strong moral code

Rannoch

Reserved, capable fighter, speaks in a low, quiet voice

Sabbat Gangrel, finds potential candidates for Brynn to Embrace and ‘recruits them’ 

From the Scottish highlands, Embraced by a local superstition that turned out to be an independent Gangrel with a beast mark that gave her translucent scales and external fangs lining her cheeks

Has badger claws for primal weapons and shapechanges into a Eurasian wolf with erythrism