#but i only want them to play together under supervision
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universalcas · 4 months ago
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The things is. I care about these characters immensely and I want to keep enjoying them. I've spent a lot of months re-reading comfort fics just to keep my brain from hurting me even more that it already does. It may sound stupid but they've kept me alive when there was nothing else left (they still do). It's the only thing I know for sure and the only thing I got right now.
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megalony · 5 months ago
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It's Bubba
Here is a new Evan Buckley imagine, requested by a lovely anon. I hope you will all like it, let me know what you think.
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Evan Buckley Masterlist
Part 2
Birthday Wishes (Prequel)
Summary: When Evan's parents come into town, they aren't happy to find their grandson prefers Bobby over them. And they take their frustrations out on (Y/n).
Enjoy.
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(Y/n)'s lips curved into a grin and she couldn't help the relief that overwhelmed her when she realised who was at the door.
"Come in." (Y/n) opened the door wider and took a step backwards to allow Bobby inside.
Her eyes followed him as he stepped into the hall, one hand tucked into his pocket and the other stretched down to push the small pedal bike through the hall. She closed the door, pressing her lips together to dampen her smile that threatened to reach her eyes. She watched Boby push the pedal bike towards the stairs so it was just out of the hallway so it wouldn't be a trip hazard.
"All fixed for the little man." Bobby stuffed both hands in his pockets and turned to face (Y/n) as she stepped past the stairs.
James had spent the weekend with Athena and Bobby and the three year old had tried riding his bike around the block, with Bobby's supervision of course. The four year old was rather fast when he had his training wheels but one of them came loose and the bike took a tumble.
Bobby had fixed the wheels back on and checked it over and he knew James would want the bike to play on before next weekend when he was due to spend the night with him and Athena again.
"Thank you, he'll be very pleased."
"Is he around?"
(Y/n) gave Bobby's arm a squeeze and pointed into the lounge. She stayed close behind him as he walked into the living room and took a peek around. Cartoons were playing on the tv, there was a colouring book on the table and crayons scattered along the floor.
And there was James, curled up in a ball on the sofa, head almost hanging off the edge and arms bound to his chest. Drooling onto the pillow as he dozed off in a power nap.
"Want a coffee?" (Y/n) kept her voice quiet, not wanting to wake James just yet when he had only been asleep for a good ten minutes or so. He would wake up soon and he would be thrilled to see Bobby when he did wake up. The three year old was under the impression that Bobby was his grandad and nobody would or wanted to correct him on that.
"Sure." Bobby patted his hand on the back of the sofa, grinning at the little boy that always stole his heart, before he spun on his heels and moved towards the kitchen.
He had come round today because he had the day off and Bobby hated to swing by and leave in a hurry. The one time he had tried to do that James had cried when Bobby didn't come inside for a drink or stay long. He wanted to hang around and chat to his grandson when he woke up.
"So, how are you?" Bobby took a seat at the kitchen table while (Y/n) flicked the kettle on and got some mugs out ready.
"Did Evan tell you his parents are in town?"
The way (Y/n) arched a brow and glanced over her shoulder at Bobby made him whistle lowly and hang his head for a moment.
No, indeed, Evan had not mentioned that little fact. Although it did explain why Evan had been restless on shift yesterday and why he had been so twitchy and distant instead of involved and forever bombarding the team with facts and new information he had learned.
"Oh, so that's who you're expecting?" He noticed (Y/n) had seemed a little jumpy when she opened the door.
(Y/n) didn't want her in-laws turning up when Evan wasn't here. She never knew what to say to the Buckley parents, things were always tense and awkward and she needed Evan to play referee and keep the peace and the tension down.
They were in town now and they had visited Maddie this morning and they should be coming to visit (Y/n) and James anytime soon. (Y/n) was dreading it, but if Bobby was here it might calm the waters a little. She hoped.
"Evan's on shift, how lucky." (Y/n) joked and placed a cup down in front of each of them, using the table as leverage to ease down and try to shake the discomfort in her back.
She slouched back in her seat, pushing her knees forward into the table while her shoulders jabbed back into the chair. The looser she sat, the easier the pain was to handle in her back and stomach.
(Y/n) hadn't been in this much pain when she was pregnant with James, but then again, she was having twins this time.
She almost wished Evan and Maddie hadn't told their parents she was pregnant. They wanted to come down more often now they knew she was having twins, just like they visited a lot when they had been expecting James. They rarely visited Evan before then, but once James was born they were down every other month and kept calling to see how he was. Evan had never had so much contact with his parents since he moved out at eighteen.
It was nice that they were trying to make an effort, but it was too little too late. They were in contact much more often now that Evan had his own family, but it still wasn't enough. Going from almost nothing to a few visits didn't make James see them as his grandparents. He thought of (Y/n)'s parents as his grandparents and he saw Bobby and Athena as Evan's parents, therefore they were his family.
Bobby had been there when James was born, he had seen him almost every day and cuddled him and took care of him. He and Athena were always taking James on days out and having him sleep over and were teaching him to ride his bike. They were his grandparents.
"I'm sure he doesn't feel very lucky. Does the little man know they're coming?"
"No, just in case they don't turn up today."
(Y/n) didn't see any point in telling James in case the Buckley parents didn't make it here today or something came up. And she knew James wouldn't be excited to see them like he would when he saw Bobby. James didn't spend a lot of time with Evan's parents and it had been months since they had last visited and over a year since they had taken him out anywhere.
They pledged when he was born that they would spend a lot of time with him and take James out places, because he was their first grandchild. So far they hadn't kept up with that ideal, and Evan hadn't expected them to either.
"Oh," (Y/n) took a quick sip of her coffee, pursing her lips when it burned the back of her throat. She set her cup down and moved her hands to the table, pushing herself up despite only just sitting down.
She aimed for the fridge and pulled down the latest scan photo Evan had pinned with a magnet, next to James's latest drawing. Which happened to be a stick figure James said was Evan, stood next to a bright red fire truck.
"Here," She couldn't hide the smile from her lips when she slid the photo over to Bobby and sat back down.
Her left hand moved to glide across her stomach where both twins were kicking up a storm. Her right hand began to tap against the table as she watched a soft but proud smile flutter across Bobby's face as he skimmed his thumb across the picture. He still had the first picture Evan had given him to announce he was going to have his first kid. Now he was having two for the price of one this time.
"For me?" He murmured quietly, wafting the picture before he got his wallet out his back pocket to keep the picture safe when (Y/n) nodded. "Only two months left."
"I can't wait." As much as (Y/n) was happy to be pregnant, she was eager for it to be over and to have both babies in her arms.
The timing was hopefully going to work out though. They had been warned (Y/n) could go into early labour because she was having twins, something which had put Evan on red alert and set off his anxiety. But (Y/n) was hoping that wouldn't happen because in three weeks it would be James's fourth birthday. Which happened to be on the same day as Evan's thirtieth birthday.
She wanted to get the party out the way and celebrate both her boys before she had the twins. The last thing they wanted was her to go into labour just before the party and ruin the day for James or take the attention away from him and Evan. Or to go into labour now and have two screaming babies disrupting the little family party they had planned out.
Maddie had taken the lead in organising a party, of course Evan had to know about it because it was for his son, but he didn't know the details. All he knew was he had his birthday off work and so did his team so they could all have a big get together. Evan didn't know where it was happening, what time, what was planned. Nothing.
It was a big birthday for him and Maddie and (Y/n) wanted to celebrate.
Evan had been head over heels when the day before his twenty-sixth birthday, (Y/n) went into labour. And when James was finally born, they looked at the time and realised it was three in the morning. Officially Evan's birthday. He got to share his special day with his boy and it had been the best present he had ever gotten.
"I'll bet. So, what's he asking for his birthday this time?" Every time Bobby asked James what he wanted or what he was expecting, he seemed to ask for something different.
"A fire truck. Like, a real one, he wasn't impressed when Evan told him he couldn't get one."
James had sat in the truck before and been for a ride and he was enthralled by the work his dad and grandad both did. He loved the trucks and the ambulance and he asked if he could have one. Evan politely explained the best he could do was get his son a replica toy truck for now which made James cry.
He wanted Evan to bring the truck home. James was under the impression that since his dad was a firefighter, he should be able to drive the truck whenever he liked and use it as his personal car.
The doorbell broke apart the conversation and (Y/n)'s shoulders visibly slumped and the way she flopped her head forward had Bobby's face softening.
He reached out to pat her arm before she pushed up and sighed, trudging out the kitchen towards the front door.
They were here. (Y/n) couldn't imagine it being anyone else at the door, she wasn't expecting anyone and she knew Maddie would be on shift this afternoon which was why her parents had gone to see her first this morning. It had to be Evan's parents.
Please don't stay until Evan gets home!
She had a horrible gut feeling that they would hang around all afternoon and stay until Evan came home from work so they could see him. (Y/n) didn't want to have to entertain them all day, but it seemed like that was a big possibility. Part of her hoped she could manage to persuade them to leave later this afternoon and come back tomorrow when Evan was off.
It would be easier for everyone, (Y/n) wouldn't be so drained if they turned up tomorrow, Evan would be home and recuperated after a good nights sleep and James would be a bit more lively.
The calmest, controlled look (Y/n) could muster plastered across her face when she opened the front door and was met with the sight of her in-laws.
Their smiles were warm and made some of the nerves in (Y/n)'s stomach die down, but it still didn't feel right to see them without Evan being here. He always controlled the situation, he steered the conversation and stopped his parents from causing any arguments. And if an unsettling topic arose, Evan squashed it immediately.
Despite everything Evan had been through with his parents, somehow, he was always calm and composed and (Y/n) didn't know how he did it.
"Hi, you made it. Come in." (Y/n) moved to let them in, watching the way they shrugged off their coats and hung them up as if they were round here every week rather than every couple of months.
They were more at ease than they used to be, but they still looked and seemed out of place here. Not like when they visited Maddie. They were happier visiting her, and for the longest time (Y/n) couldn't understand why. Until it was made clear why Evan had been born in the first place.
"Do you want to go into the kitchen?"
(Y/n) led them into the kitchen, locking eyes with Bobby who took another sip of coffee and stayed seating. He didn't feel the need to stand up or shake hands or try and make any effort in a big hello with the Buckleys.
"Would you like a drink?" (Y/n) rolled her lips together and watched her in-laws as they dithered, debating whether or not to sit down at the table or stand near the counter. They seemed to settle on sitting opposite Bobby at the table, although they looked perplexed as if wondering why he was here.
"A cup of tea would be nice."
She rattled through the cupboard for any teabags. Evan could drink coffee like it was water and most of the team had a preference for coffee, but not many of their friends and family drank tea. (Y/n) used to have a taste for iced tea when she was pregnant with James, but she hadn't drank much of it since.
An old pack of teabags was still in date and (Y/n) set to work making them each a drink.
"How have you been? You remember Bobby,"
"Yes, yes, Evan's Captain. We're well, we missed little James, where is he?" Margaret nodded towards Bobby and watched him raise his mug towards her before his eyes flitted over towards (Y/n).
Bobby couldn't help the nagging feeling that clawed behind his chest. They weren't asking how (Y/n) was. God knows when the last time was that they had seen or talked to her, and here they were not bothering to ask how their pregnant daughter in law was doing in herself.
But he held his tongue. There was no sense saying anything, Bobby didn't want to start an argument and he knew it wasn't worth it.
"I'll go see if he's awake."
With their cups placed in front of them, (Y/n) smiled and slowly padded through into the living room. She didn't want to wake James, she wanted to let him sleep because he needed it, but if she didn't wake him now and Bobby left, James would get upset. He would want to see him and Evan's parents wanted to see him.
They always made the effort with James, maybe because they knew they had messed up so royally with Evan and were trying to make amends through his son.
A smile fluttered across (Y/n)'s lips when she saw James was still in the same place she had left him earlier, cuddled up on the sofa.
It took some effort for (Y/n) to lean on the arm of the sofa and lower herself down to her knees. She smoothed her hand across her stomach, settling the twins while her other hand moved out and brushed through James's hair. She brushed her fingertips across his temple and moved his messy hair back on his head which roused him.
His tired eyes blinked open like headlights and be brushed his fist against the tip of his nose, squeaking a yawn while he stretched his arms above his head.
"Someone's here to see you." Her voice was quiet and she leaned across to kiss his cheek which puffed out into a smile.
That was all James needed to wake himself up. A shiver tore through him and he sat up straight, stretching and wriggling like a worm on a hook before he scrambled down off the sofa. He didn't have to know who was here, James loved visitors he would attach to anyone who came by.
With a deep breath, (Y/n) heaved herself back up to her feet and followed James through into the kitchen.
"There he is." The happiness in Phillip's voice was surprising, but it was James's reaction that had (Y/n)'s heart jumping up into her throat.
Panic fluttered across James's face when he saw his grandparents sat at the table. He could see Phillip's arms stretched out towards him like he was waiting for James to run into his arms. And Margaret was leaning forward with her hands clasped together and a sickly sweet smile on her face. But James didn't want to go over to them.
He didn't want hugs or kisses from the two people he didn't know very well. The grandparents that were more on the phone than they were in person. The ones who held his hand too tight when they sporadically took him out. Who were more often than not arguing with his parents or visiting his aunt Maddie. The ones who upset his mum and didn't often speak to his dad.
The three year old paused in the doorway, hands wavering in front of him as he tried to work out what to do. He didn't know whether to back up and cling to his mum or go over and let them hug him.
He didn't have to decide.
The moment James looked up and realised there was another person standing in front of the sink washing a cup, he seemed to become animated again and come back to life.
"It's bubba!"
Excitement flooded James's voice and his arms stretched out as a grin as broad as his arms fluttered across his face.
"Hey, there's my little man." A quiet 'oof' left Bobby's lips when the three year old barrelled into him like a bullet. He leaned down and scooped James up, setting him on his hip so the little boy could curl his arms around his neck and cuddle up close.
He pressed a kiss to Bobby's cheek and clung tightly to his neck, giggling and shimmying when Bobby swayed him from side to side.
Although James could say Bobby, he never called him that. Since the moment he began to talk, he could never pronounce Bobby and it always came out wrong. So James ended up calling him bubba, something which Evan had called James when he was a baby. Now that was James's special name for the person he classed as his grandad. He thought bubba meant grandad and no one corrected him on that.
Just like when he saw Athena, he called her 'nanny Nash' and she loved it.
"How are you, hm?" Bobby kissed his temple and eased back against the counter, jostling James in his arms. His eyes flitted across to (Y/n) when she sat down at the table across from her in-laws who could do nothing but stare at Bobby and their grandson.
"You fix the bike, bubba?"
"I did, it's all fixed and ready for you."
The squeal James let out had bobby's smile broadening and he let James pull him down by the neck so he could snuggle their cheeks together. He murmured "Thank you," and squeezed Bobby tighter.
The glares Bobby could feel being sent his way made him hug the little boy tighter like he was suddenly afraid they were going to try and snatch the little boy from him. He kissed James's temple before he leaned forward and set him down to his feet again.
"I think I'd better get going, I'll be on shift to see your dad soon."
"You leaving?" James grabbed Bobby's hand and swayed their arms back and forth between them for a few seconds, the disappointment clear in his voice which made Bobby shiver. He didn't want to go but he had to, he couldn't impose and he did have to get ready for shift soon.
"I gotta go, but you'll see me at the weekend, okay?" He kissed the top of James's head and rubbed his hand across his back when James let go of him to hug his legs.
Part of him wondered if the toddler was going to let him go or not, but James eventually unravelled himself with a soft "Love you," which Bobby returned.
He watched James clamber up onto (Y/n)'s lap and his smile softened when the three year old wiggled onto her knees and huffed at her stomach which seemed to be in his way. His hands tapped down on the table as he leaned back into (Y/n), curving around her stomach while she kissed the top of his head and wrapped both arms around his waist.
"I'll speak to you soon."
"Thank you." (Y/n) reached up and gripped Bobby's hand when he held her shoulder as he passed.
Part of her wanted him to stay. She wanted back up, help, a friend to stick around until Evan came home. But they both knew it would be easier if he left, and he had to get ready for work, (Y/n) wouldn't delay him just because she didn't want to be on her own with her in-laws.
(Y/n) was ready for a lie down.
She was ready for Phillip and Margaret to either make their departure or for Evan to come home and save her.
She rested her head on her hand and looked across the table at her little boy. James was sat on Phillip's knee, munching on a biscuit, pushing a toy truck across the table. He didn't look impressed, he wasn't settled.
The couple had interrogated James for almost an hour, asking him questions, trying to check on him and how he had been doing. What he liked to watch and play with and of course, James had told them all about Bobby helping him to ride a bike.
"Tv?" James looked across at (Y/n) who reached for a biscuit herself. She didn't like eating in front of Margaret, not after a few years ago when her mother in law liked to tell (Y/n) what she should and shouldn't eat. And she doubted Margaret would agree or listen if (Y/n) tried to say she was eating for three, which she was.
"Go ahead baby."
He needed no more permission than that to scuttle away from his grandparents and rush into the living room.
"Evan should be home soon." (Y/n) ran her fingers through her hair and leaned her head to one side. She tried to smile, but she felt exhausted. She wished she and James were visiting because then it would be easy to make an excuse and go home. She couldn't exactly kick anyone out of her own home, it wouldn't be right and they were Evan's parents, (Y/n) didn't feel like she had the right to tell them to leave. That was Evan's job, his responsibility.
"Why did you let him call him that?" Margaret's words took (Y/n) by surprise.
Her brows furrowed and she looked over at her with confusion in her eyes. What was she talking about? Why did she have that look of discern in her eyes and something foul on her lips?
"Call who what?"
"Bubba."
"Oh, well that's- that's what he's always called Bobby, he could never pronounce Bobby properly." (Y/n) smiled fondly at the thought, even though she knew Phillip wouldn't see this so happily.
It was just a name that stuck, something that James found comfort in calling Bobby. A name that he loved, but whenever it was Bobby's birthday or Christmas or a special event, James would get him a card that said grandad on the front. He saw Bobby as Evan's dad and therefore as one of his grandparents, and that was the way they all liked it.
"But I'm his grandad. You let him run right past me to get to Bobby, and he's not even family. James barely spoke to us just now."
They couldn't blame (Y/n) for that.
It wasn't her fault that they weren't around enough for James to feel like they were his true family, his true grandparents. He couldn't help being close to Bobby when Bobby was always in his life and they weren't as close to him. Bobby had cared for him when he was a baby, looked after him, took him out most weekends and dealt with his temper tantrums and checked in when he didn't feel well.
If Phillip and Margaret didn't bother to check in or be around for most of James's life and the important things, they couldn't expect him to be close to them if they didn't do things in return.
"He is Evan's captain, not his father and James shouldn't be calling him grandad-"
"He's been in James's life since he was born, he's as good as a grandparent." (Y/n) turned away from them, twisting to the side on her chair to stop looking over at them.
"No he isn't, I'm his grandad, you shouldn't let him call Bobby that, it's wrong."
With a scoff, (Y/n) shook her head and used the table as leverage to push herself up. This wasn't fair and she didn't have to sit and listen to them chide her for something that wasn't her fault and wasn't even a problem to begin with.
"How can it be wrong? Bobby's prominent in his life, you see how much James loves him."
(Y/n) threw her hand to the side, wishing she could just project her thoughts and memories into their minds so they could see this from her point of view. They couldn't just expect things to go both ways and want James to be attached to them if they didn't put the effort in and see him often enough.
She padded over to the sink, dumping her cup before she tried to tidy the counter. She needed something to do before they sent her up the wall.
"You didn't even say anything to him. He completely ignored us and you let him, he can't get away with everything-"
"He didn't do anything wrong." There was no reason for (Y/n) to tell James off if he hadn't acted out or done anything wrong. He had been affectionate and happy and he was now entertaining himself in the living room, he had been as good as always today.
With one hand gripping the counter, (Y/n) moved her other hand down to cradle the side of her stomach. She didn't feel very well.
When was Evan coming home? Couldn't they wait for him to have this argument?
"And what was all that about a bike?"
(Y/n) couldn't refrain from rolling her eyes and she was glad they were sitting behind her so they wouldn't see.
"Bobby's teaching him to ride a bike, they had a collision at the weekend so Bobby fixed it for him." She motioned to the hallway but she was rather surprised when Phillip got up and actually went to take a look. As implied, there was a blue pedal bike in the hall that both of them had completely overlooked when they came in.
She spun on her heels when she heard Phillip tut and gasp and her eyes widened when Margaret had tears in her eyes.
Her free hand moved down to her stomach that twinged like a coil within her had been pulled and she let herself slump into the counter to keep herself upright. Adrenaline was coursing through (Y/n)'s stomach and fluttering up to her chest, making it harder to breathe and her fingers were starting to turn numb.
"We could have- I could have taught him. For goodness sake (Y/n) that man isn't family. I'm his bloody grandad."
"Wasn't it Maddie who taught Evan how to ride a bike?" She couldn't help the snappy response or the way her nose crinkled and her upper lip curled into a grimace. They couldn't be pulling this one on her. They didn't teach Evan to ride a bike or show any interest in helping him and watching him grow up. Maddie had been both sister, mother and father to Evan.
That was the reason Evan was so desperate to be there for all of the moments with James. He didn't want his son to feel as left out, cold and alone as he did growing up and it was why Evan wasn't surprised when his parents fell through on their promise to be around for their grandson.
So if Bobby wanted to step into that role and keep up the pretense of being a grandparent and actually love James, Evan was more than happy for his Captain and surrogate dad to do that for them all.
"And he stays with this Bobby on the weekend? You've never let him stay with us," Margaret moved her hand to cover her chest like there was a hollow pain she was trying to blot out and it made (Y/n) feel infuriated.
Dread crept up the back of (Y/n)'s throat and she could feel tears burning in her eyes. She looked around them to try and peek into the living room, but James was none the wiser to what was going on. He was sat on the floor with a few toys scattered round him and a Scooby Doo cartoon playing on the tv, he was happy in ignorant bliss.
"I never- that's out of order."
Both hands moved to her stomach as tears welled up in her eyes from both fury and agony. She was starting to feel like a boombox, her heartbeat pulsing under every inch of her skin making her vibrate. And the twins were starting to shift around so much it was becoming painful. Her abdomen was tense and tight and weighed heavy making (Y/n) want to lean forward more than usual.
"You've never a-asked for James to stay with you." They had never asked, but even if they did, (Y/n) wouldn't agree. James may be a social butterfly, but he didn't settle with many people, only close family.
He wouldn't cope being away from home to stay with Phillip and Margaret, he would be crying and wanting to be back home. Bobby and Athena were different, James had been staying over with them every other weekend since he was one. It was what he was used to, and he was often staying with Maddie and Chimney when she wanted time with her nephew.
(Y/n) reached her hand out when James came toddling into the kitchen, toy truck cradled to his chest and a worried look on his face. He stared between his mum and grandparents, unsure what was going on. But he didn't like the way Phillip had his hands on his hips and how Margaret looked a mix between angry and upset.
"You need to have words with him, (Y/n). You're turning him against us-"
"Stop it."
"Well you shouldn't-"
"Don't shout at mummy." James stomped his foot down on the floor and moved to stand in front of (Y/n). He lifted his chin and looked up at them with a defiant look that matched Evan one hundred percent. He didn't know why they were arguing or what they were talking about, but he didn't like the way they were talking to his mum.
He knew if his dad was here he would of already manouvred in front of (Y/n) and would have told his parents off already. Without Evan here, James felt the need to stop them shouting at his mum.
"Sweetie I- we weren't-"
Both of them paused when a quiet "Oww," tumbled past (Y/n)'s lips and she hunkered down. Her nails scratched into the kitchen countertop and her other hand pushed up into her abdomen like she was trying to lift up the weight of the twins to relieve the pain she was now feeling.
She couldn't help the way her knees bent forward and she lowered down like she was trying to crouch or do a squat behind James.
The tears welling up in her eyes started to fall freely down her face as her chin tucked into her chest that was starting to shake. Her stomach was hurting, more specifically, her lower abdomen. Sharp, striking pains hit her like a knife and she shuddered through her next breath, begging for the pain to disappear.
This wasn't right. (Y/n) was on observation by the midwife, she was having extra check ups to make sure she wasn't going to go into early labour and to control things if she did. She wasn't likely to make it to her due date with twins and now, (Y/n) had a horrible feeling that this might be labour pains.
She couldn't go into labour now. She was thirty-one weeks, they had two months left before this should be happening, or in the very least, one more month before they should be thinking about this.
Her in-laws were stressing her enough to cripple her body down in pain. If they had distressed her enough to enforce contractions, Evan was going to hit the roof when he found out.
"Honey, what's the matter?"
"I- I don't…" Reaching her hand out, (Y/n) shifted to grip the table but her knees were almost scraping the floor.
She shuffled, bending her feet oddly to get herself across to the chair and she shook off Margaret's hand when the older woman tried to reach out for her. (Y/n) didn't want her help when she was probably the reason for (Y/n)'s sudden pains.
For a few seconds, none of them said anything. Both elder parents stood hovering by the table, unsure what to say or what to do to help. Margaret looked like she was going to reach out for James but he moved quicker. He stood beside his mum, leaning into her just a little in case she didn't want his touch, but he wanted comfort and security at the same time.
(Y/n) tried to take a few deep breaths and ward away the tears, she hated being upset when James was around to see. She didn't want to scare him like that, but when another pain tore through her abdomen, she couldn't help the way she started to shake.
Her body coiled forward and she swallowed down a whimper, moving her hand back and forth across her stomach but it didn't do anything, not that she was expecting it to take away the pain anyway.
"Call Maddie." (Y/n) spat the words through gritted teeth as she stared up at the pair of them through blurring eyes.
"She's at work-"
"Then call 911!" Her voice changed to a low whine and she slammed her hand down on the table to get their attention. She felt the way James jumped against her but he stayed close and did well not to cry too. If Maddie was at work that was better for (Y/n), Maddie could give them the advice they needed and get help. She could do something and call someone because Bobby was now at work and they didn't know if Evan was on his way home or not.
(Y/n) needed help and she needed Maddie if she was going into the hospital because she didn't want Phillip and Margaret to be the ones looking after James.
She needed someone she trusted who James would feel comfortable being around and Maddie was the only person they could call right now when everyone else was at work, including Evan.
Slouching to the right, (Y/n) flopped her right arm on the table and dropped her forehead down onto her arm. She could feel herself beginning to shake when another pain wracked her stomach in a low, dull throb. The first one felt like a contraction, (Y/n) knew what that felt like even after four years. And she would guess that this was some sort of stress pains but whatever they were, she shouldn't be having them.
A quiet mewl left her lips and she wanted to smile when she felt James tenderly kiss her arm and smoothed his hand up and down her back like he wanted to do something to help her.
She wanted Evan. They both wanted Evan.
… Evan could feel himself trembling, legs close to giving way as he rounded the corner and set off into another sprint down the corridor. His hands balled into fists at his sides and his chest was heaving, threatening to strain and break free from his shirt.
The moment his eyes locked on his family, a small puddle of relief started to bloom in his stomach. He felt better for seeing them, but he still didn't know what was going on.
His lips rolled together when his sights set on James. The three year old started to whine and wriggle on Maddie's lap, previously settled leaning into her chest until he realised Evan was finally here. He kicked his legs out and slid beneath Maddie's arms, sliding down to the floor so he could set off into a sprint.
James's arms deadlocked around Evan's legs and he tilted his head back, looking up at his dad with tears in his eyes and his chest panting and heaving.
"Daddy."
Leaning down, Evan scooped James up, allowing his boy to grip his neck and snuggle close into his chest.
"I'm here, I've got you."
Evan danced his eyes around his family. Maddie pushed up from her chair and stepped closer, her hand already on his arm giving a light squeeze to try and calm him down and give whatever comfort she could. Their parents remained seated in the corridor, hands linked together, worried eyes gazing up at Evan as if he was a profit that had just appeared in front of them.
"What happened?" Evan didn't know what brought them all here.
He had only just climbed off the truck after a two hour call out when the shift lead told him to call Maddie because dispatch had gotten through to the station that he had a family emergency. And all his sister told him over the phone was that (Y/n) had had pains and they were taking her to the hospital to get checked out.
He let Maddie steer him a few feet away down the corridor and her eyes flitted to James, but the toddler wasn't listening. He was happily humming into Evan's chest and drawing patterns on his shirt. Evan didn't have chance to change. He had sped from the station down here to the hospital so he was still in his shirt that was black with smoke, damp with water backsplash and tight and crumpled from heat.
"She started getting cramps, the doctor said it was the start of labour pains."
Evan could feel his upper lip curling and he tilted his head back, trying to dull down the ache in his lower chest and the fire burning behind his ribs.
"Why? It's too early… when I left last night she was fine. Where is she?" Evan wouldn't have gone to work if he thought (Y/n) wasn't well or if he'd of known she would go downhill like this. There was nothing to suggest she was going to go into labour and it was too early for that, this would be premature for the twins and dangerous.
Evan bounced James up and down in his arms and cradled the back of his head, tilting his head down so he could kiss the top of his head.
"They've given her something to stop the contractions."
"Thank God, Maddie what happened?"
The way Maddie looked across at their parents made Evan's stomach drop. What had gone on while he had been at work? Something had to have happened, (Y/n) couldn't just go into labour out of the blue when she had been fine last night and there had been no problems before now.
"Mum and dad were round to see them… (Y/n) said they were arguing with her."
"They did this?" His tone was dark but it was the look in his eyes that set Maddie on edge even more.
She watched the way he leaned down to try and set James back on his feet, but the little boy wouldn't let go of Evan's neck. He clung to his chest and wriggled in his arms, whining to try and get Evan to keep hold of him.
"James, baby let go for a minute-"
"They shouted at mummy."
Evan paused, crouching down with James stood between his knees with his arms bound tight around his neck. His hands squeezed James's sides and he kept him close, trying to stay calm.
"What did they say, baby?" He wasn't sure if he wanted the answer or not, but Evan wasn't impressed in the slightest that James had clearly heard something he shouldn't. Had his parents really shouted at his wife? Had they argued with her with James nearby to hear them? Had they upset his wife enough to cause all of this and panic his son too?
"They were arguing about Bubba, and the bike… they were being mean." James leaned his head on Evan's shoulder and pushed into his chest until Evan held him tighter and kissed his temple.
"Okay. Okay, baby you stay with aunt Maddie for a minute, then we'll go see mummy. Bubba's coming soon to see us all too."
Evan shared a look with his sister and he chose to ignore the panic in her eyes while he carefully nudged James across to her. He waited until she had her arms wrapped around him before he got up and advanced over to his parents. Both hands curled into fists at his sides and he took a glance over his shoulder to make sure James was at a safe enough distance away not to hear anything, although that meant Evan was going to have to keep his voice down.
"Evan-"
"I was in the middle of a double shift, and I get a call to say (Y/n)'s in hospital, so I come down here to be told she's in labour after arguing with you. And you have the nerve to stick around? What the Hell did you say to her to cause this?"
He hadn't even finished his twenty-four hour shift before he got called to come here. Evan thought maybe (Y/n) had had some sort of fall or she was sick or having some kind of pains with the twins. He wasn't expecting her to be in labour- which hopefully had stopped by now. And he wasn't expecting his parents to be the cause of all this.
"She got herself worked up-"
"Labour doesn't count as worked up, mum, it counts as fucking stressed out. What did you say?"
"James wouldn't come near us today, he's rushing around with that Captain of yours, calling him his grandad and spending weekends with him. She's turning him against us Evan, we are his grandparents."
A horrid shuddering breath rocked Evan's system. His hands found his hips and his foot began to tap against the floor as he looked up at the ceiling. He could feel his fingers puncturing into his hips and his chest ached at their words.
How were they blaming (Y/n) for this?
She hadn't done anything to warrant any of this. It was their own doing and now they had stressed his wife into labour when she was supposed to be resting and taking things easy until the twins were born.
"Just leave."
"Evan, don't do this, please."
"Bobby is James's grandad, always has been, always will be. He doesn't stay with you because he barely fucking knows you and I wouldn't trust him with you either. Look what you've done today, we'll be lucky if she doesn't go into premature labour now after this." Twisting to the left, Evan motioned his hand out towards James. "Come on, we're gonna see mum."
As soon as James trotted over to him, Evan grabbed his hand and steered him straight ahead. He wasn't stopping to argue and he wasn't having James getting worried or upset any further than this. He wanted to see (Y/n) and make sure she was alright.
He could feel Maddie close behind them and he rapped his knuckles lightly on the door before he headed inside.
His lips curved into a smile before he could stop himself and something warm flooded his eyes when they set on his wife. The moment her arms stretched out for him, Evan let go of James so he could move forward.
Evan almost melted on the spot when (Y/n)'s arms looped around his neck. He wound his arms tightly around her waist, trying not to squeeze too much and cause her any more pain or discomfort. His face burrowed into the side of her neck and he inhaled her scent, smothering his lips against her skin while he felt (Y/n)'s hand run up and down his back.
"Are you okay? What did the doctor say?"
Evan let his weight slump down on the side of the bed and he didn't miss the way the bed groaned beneath him and he felt it shudder when James scrambled up on the other side of the bed.
(Y/n) gripped Evan's hand and opened her other arm out, mumbling "Hi baby," when James crawled up and plonked himself down beneath her right arm. She didn't miss the way Evan's eyes kept moving to her stomach and she gently moved his hand to rest on her stomach. She wasn't tender or made of glass, he could reach out for the twins like he always did without fear of making her feel any worse.
"Contractions have stopped, but I'm here for twenty four hour observation to make sure they don't start again. They're both doing okay."
Evan mumbled his relief before he leaned forward and pressed his lips down against her stomach. His lips curved into a grin when he felt James's fingers brush through his hair, something the little boy had always seen (Y/n) do often.
"Sorry to drag you away from work."
"Hey, if you're not well I need to be here. Bobby's coming down soon, said he'd look after a certain someone for us so I can stay with you."
He could see the panic that fluttered across (Y/n)'s face and he felt her grip tighten on his wrist when she looked towards the door before she looked back at Evan. It wasn't that she didn't want Bobby to come by, of course she did, it was sweet that he cared and that he was willing to help them when he didn't have to. But Evan's parents were outside that door and (Y/n) didn't want another fight breaking out if they saw the Buckleys.
"Evan, you parents-"
"Aren't staying. Everyone who matters is right in here, so no worrying. Everything's okay."
They were all in here and when Bobby arrived, that would be their immediate family right here in this room. His parents had been told to go and Evan doubted they would hang around after what had happened today. He wasn't going to let this happen again.
1K notes · View notes
ceraga · 1 month ago
Text
40 rules while under Ceraga's care
thanks holen for helping me put this together
Mommy will always offer at least 2 punishments. Doing both with get you a gold star.
If you’re being good and ask for a punishment, you’ll be punished and get a gold star.
You must hug you biggest stuffie while eating, I will feed you.
If I hold the pacifier in front of your mouth, it’s an offer. If I put it in your mouth, it’s a command.
Asking for a change makes you have to wait half an hour before you get one. Minimum.
When typing on a keyboard, backspace is not permitted, only mass delete.
Bottles will be the default choice if you want to drink out of something. Sippy cups are for special occasions.
If you want to make cummies, you cannot have only a dry or wet diaper. It must be messy. (Remember rule 9)
You cannot touch your diaper with your hands, only I or any of the other bigs around may do so.
When granted time to play with Mrs. Magic Wand, be sure to thank her before and after use.
When you have a pacifier in, you may only type with emotes.
No entering the bathroom unsupervised.
You can ask to go to the potty. You however you cannot make cummies for 3 days and I will wipe you down each time. Toilet paper is for bigs only.
You can only watch G movies and E rated games without supervision. PG and E10+ requires supervision.
If you are commanded to keep your paci in and you take it out, you will be getting the gag and mittens as a lesson.
Once a week, something will be spiked with laxatives.
When meeting one of my friends for the first time or for the first time in a month, you must lift your skirt or lower your pants to show off your diaper to them.
The second time in a week you do not make a mess, you will be given an enema.
You must crawl for at least an hour a day. If you crawl for at least 3 hours a day, you get a gold star.
You’re too little to sit in the front seat.
If you have your pacifier in from the moment you wake up to the moment you go to sleep with only a 1 hour break in between, you get a gold star.
Diaper porn counts as PG content as stated by rule 14. You need supervision and permission.
If I’m playing games with friends and you want to get my attention be present in the room so I can check on you easily.
Even if you’re going into the shower, when you get out of your diaper, I will be wiping you down.
If you make cummies while clean or wet, you cannot come for a month. See rule 8.
If you lie, swear, or are rude, you will be muted buttoned.
For your purposes, the words cum and orgasm are swears. You must say cummies or stickies.
For your purpose the word toilet is also a swear, you must say potty.
You can exchange 10 gold stars for 1 day in Pull-Ups
You can exchange 10 gold stars for one date with Mrs. Buzzy Wand.
If you’re caught with big kid undies in your room, you will wear them under your diapers until they are all gone.
If you ask for big undies, you will get them 4 sizes too big to work as diaper covers.
Once a week, you may ask for lax cuddles. You’ll be given laxatives and you’ll cuddle for 2 hours. You will get a gold star.
If you hear a swear in a piece of media we’re watching, you must point it out or it will count as if you have said it.
If you tell me when another little swears, you will get a gold star. However, other littles around you can do the same.
If you want to get more intimate with a little, you must tell me so I can supervise.
Don’t get fussy if I decide you need a change in the middle of humpies.
After being intimate with a little, you must hold hands for the rest of the day or until separated.
I chose what clothes you wear and I will get you into them.
Every once and a while, I will put something up your bum during a change. Half the time it’s a sugar pill, the other half will be a suppository.
663 notes · View notes
baelarys · 2 months ago
Note
req!!
jealous aemond at their twin daughters or their other child nameday…when the reader be ask dancing with some lord. And BAM jealous husband moments…
𝙅𝙚𝙖𝙡𝙤𝙪𝙨
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Aemond targaryen x reader velaryon ¡Niece!
Word count: 3222
Warninig: Jealousy, fluff
Pt1,pt2 & pt3(I will continue with this dynamic until I die or you get tired hahaha because I love this little family, don't be shy and make more requests for whatever you want!)
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Everything had to look impeccable, perfect like in a fairy tale, and you had worked hard to make sure it was so. The castle halls and gardens had been adorned with millions of flowers, each one carefully selected to harmonize with the colorful and majestic tapestries hanging from the stone walls. The servants had worked tirelessly under your watchful supervision, ensuring that not a single detail was out of place.
You had eagerly awaited this day, your princesses' name day, an event that brought together the most powerful Lords and Ladies of Westeros. The sun shone high in the sky, blessing the celebration with its warm light, while the tables in the gardens filled with delicate dishes and golden cups of wine.
You stood by the grand doors of the hall, attentively watching as the guests arrived. Elegant laughter and lively conversations filled the air as ladies in silk and brocade dresses gracefully paraded, followed by knights whose armor gleamed in the sun. The banners of the great houses fluttered proudly in the wind, each a reminder of the nobility and power gathered at your celebration. Every courteous gesture, every measured smile, and respectful bow reflected the harmony you had worked so hard to achieve.
Your daughters, Vaera and Vaerys, were the very image of joy and youthful pride. Clad in matching dresses, their golden hair crowned with flower garlands gleamed under the light. They walked confidently through the hall and gardens, their small steps filled with enthusiasm and curiosity, as if they were truly the mistresses of the place. The laughter of both mingled with the soft music accompanying the event, as they played carefree among the guests, who were quick to praise their charm and beauty. The attention they received pleased them immensely, their childish smiles lighting up every corner they passed.
Aerion, on the other hand, did not share his sisters' festive spirit. Since waking up, he seemed to carry a cloud of discontent that darkened his little face. He had not left your side all day, and his irritability became evident whenever you tried to step away for even a few minutes. As soon as you were out of sight, his cries echoed through the halls, a constant reminder of his foul mood. Your attempts to soothe him with sweet words and caresses seemed to have only a temporary effect, as any interruption of your presence turned him into an inconsolable baby.
The hour of the banquet had finally arrived, and you found yourself seated next to Aemond, who, despite his well-known aversion to such events, wore an expression of patient resignation, trying his best to appear comfortable in the midst of the celebration. The great hall was filled, with the royal family occupying the seats of honor. To your right, Queen Alicent exchanged solemn glances with her children, while your mother and grandmother, Rhaenys, and the Velaryons sat at the main table alongside your maternal relatives. The torches illuminated the room, casting golden reflections on the goblets and platters overflowing with delicacies.
You, for your part, tried to remain present, though your attention was divided between the banqueting bustle and Aerion’s persistent restlessness, still nestled in your lap. With gentle movements, you stroked his golden hair, trying to soothe him as the little one emitted soft sighs of exhaustion. It was a fragile, temporary comfort, as if at any moment the child's bad mood might resurface.
Suddenly, an unsettling feeling crept over you, as if a burning gaze was resting on your skin, piercing through the warm atmosphere of the hall. At first, you thought it was Aemond, watching you as he often did when he thought you wouldn’t notice. You turned your head slightly, expecting to find his one eye fixed on you, but to your surprise, he was engrossed in a whispered conversation with his mother, Queen Alicent. Their words were barely audible, but his concentration seemed complete.
Confused, you glanced away, discreetly searching the nearby faces. That’s when you saw him. It wasn’t Aemond watching you so intently, but Lord Donald Tarly, whose position at the table gave him a clear view of you. His penetrating green eyes were fixed on you with a mix of curiosity and something more—something difficult to decipher from across the distance. It was a gaze laden with intentions you couldn’t interpret at that moment but which undoubtedly made you uncomfortable.
The lord, heir to one of the oldest and most respected houses of the Reach, had only recently arrived at court after several campaigns on the western border. His reputation as a formidable warrior and strategist preceded him, and although his public demeanor had been impeccable, that insistent scrutiny from the other side of the room made you feel vulnerable.
Instinctively, you adjusted Aerion's position in your lap, using the movement to divert your gaze and cover up by appearing focused on your child. However, the discomfort remained. Lord Tarly's gaze was unyielding, as if he was waiting for some kind of reaction from you.
Aemond, despite his apparent detachment from the surroundings, noticed the change in your posture. "Is everything alright?" he murmured, his deep voice barely a whisper as he leaned closer to you, his expression unchanging. There was no need to explain the situation to him; his keen perception seemed to have sensed your discomfort even before you fully understood it yourself.
The banquet continued, with the atmosphere growing denser and more charged as the food came in endless trays of roasted meats, golden breads, and fragrant sweets. However, your attention was far from the feast. Aerion, still in your arms, was beginning to fidget, his heavy eyelids struggling against the sleep that wouldn’t quite come. His sisters, not far off, had started to sway in their seats, their eyes heavy with sleep after a day of games and excitement.
With a gentle gesture, you leaned toward Aemond. "I think it's time to put the children to bed," you whispered, watching as Aerion nestled closer to you, seeking the warmth of your body. Aemond nodded slightly, a sign of approval that needed no further words. With one last look at the hall, you carefully stood up, holding Aerion in your arms while summoning one of the maids to help with the girls.
You left the hall, leaving behind the growing clamor of the evening. The sounds of laughter and animated conversations were muffled as you walked away, and the echo of your footsteps resonated in the wide corridors. The torches illuminated your path as the girls, tired but obedient, followed closely.
You finally reached the children's rooms, where the maids had already prepared their beds. Gently, you placed Aerion in his crib, caressing his forehead with a tenderness only a mother could offer. His eyes, now almost closed, sought yours for a brief moment before surrendering to sleep. The girls, between whispers and soft giggles, were guided to their beds by the maids, who soon dimmed the lights and left them to their dreams.
Once you ensured that everyone was peacefully asleep, you paused for a moment to watch them. Aerion breathed calmly, and his sisters, wrapped in their blankets, looked as innocent and peaceful as the day they were born. You sighed, letting go of some of the tension you had accumulated throughout the night.
When you returned to the great hall, the atmosphere had changed dramatically. The festivities had evolved, shedding the formalities that marked the ceremonial dinners. Now, laughter was louder, wine glasses were raised more frequently, and the sound of music blended with the clinking of glasses and the rhythmic footsteps on the marble floor.
The center of the hall was cleared, turned into an improvised dance floor. Pairs of nobles, some visibly affected by wine, spun and laughed, their garments shining under the torchlight. The music, once soft, had come to life, with violins and lutes setting a livelier rhythm, suited for the occasion. The younger guests, those who stayed away from the stern gazes of the older ones, seemed to embrace the celebration with a freedom you had not seen earlier in the evening.
Determined to return to your seat next to Aemond, you maneuvered around the edges of the dance floor, avoiding the couples spinning and laughing in their intoxication. The hall vibrated with the lively music of the lutes and violins, and the atmosphere, filled with wine and laughter, seemed to intensify by the second.
However, just before reaching your destination, an unexpected obstacle appeared before you. As you looked up, you came face to face with Lord Donald Tarly. His smile was wide, and the warmth with which he regarded you suggested more than mere courtesy. His eyes roamed your face with a familiarity that made you uncomfortable, but there was no way to avoid the encounter without appearing rude.
"My lady," he greeted with a courteous bow, though his tone held a confidence that bordered on insolence. "It would be an honor to invite you to dance."
You hesitated for a moment, feeling the urge to decline his offer to avoid stirring Aemond’s displeasure. However, given the public nature of the event and the presence of nobles and allies, you decided to maintain appearances. After all, it was just a dance, and courtesy dictated that you should not refuse without a clear reason.
"Of course, Lord Tarly," you replied with a nod, taking his hand when he offered it. You knew Aemond wouldn’t be pleased, but you trusted he would understand; after all, some formalities were unavoidable in court.
Lord Tarly’s fingers gently closed around yours as he guided you to the dance floor. The music continued to resonate, and the violins began a softer melody, fitting for a quiet conversation. As you started to move to the rhythm, Lord Tarly broke the silence.
“It’s an honor to dance with you tonight, my lady. I must confess I’ve been looking forward to this moment since I arrived at the banquet,” he said, his tone kind but with a hint of flirtation.
You managed a courteous smile. “It’s a pleasure, Lord Tarly. I hope you’ve enjoyed the festivities.”
“I would enjoy it more if every night included the privilege of your company,” he replied without losing composure. You could feel his gaze examining you with interest, and you decided not to respond to that.
However, as the dance continued, you found yourself laughing at one of Lord Tarly’s anecdotes. Despite your initial reservations, the conversation turned out to be more pleasant than you had anticipated. His humor was subtle, and his ability to keep the conversation flowing made time pass quickly.
But then, as you gently twirled to the music, you felt a shiver run down your spine. It was as if an invisible force compelled you to look across the room. Raising your gaze, you met Aemond’s eyes on the other side of the hall. He was seated, his posture rigid, his expression grave. The tension in his jaw was evident, and though he hadn’t said a word, his gaze conveyed everything you needed to know. Aemond’s lips barely moved, but the fire in his eyes indicated that the scene before him displeased him greatly.
Your heart skipped a beat. Aemond was not known for his patience when it came to you, especially when someone else showed interest in your attention. His gaze was a mix of jealousy and barely concealed anger, and you could see how his fingers tightened around the goblet he held, as if trying to contain himself.
“Are you alright, princess?” Lord Tarly’s voice pulled you from your thoughts.
You forced a smile, though your attention was no longer fully on the conversation. “Yes, of course. Just a bit distracted.”
“I see that Prince Aemond is watching you quite intently,” Tarly remarked with a barely perceptible smile. “I hope I’m not causing any misunderstandings.”
You tried to laugh lightly, though you knew the situation was becoming more tense. “No, of course not. Aemond is… very protective, that’s all.”
“Protective?” Lord Tarly’s smile widened a little. “I can’t blame him. There’s certainly much to protect.”
You felt uncomfortable at the double meaning in his words, and as the music began to slow down, you decided it was time to end the dance. “It has been a pleasure, Lord Tarly, but I think I should return to my husband.”
You stepped away gracefully, determined to return to Aemond. When you sat next to him, you hoped he would break the silence, but he did not. He didn’t even look at you. His jaw was tight, and the jealous glint in his single eye was unmistakable, though he made no effort to conceal it.
Frustrated, you took his hand in yours, trying to smooth over the situation. However, his rigidity remained. “Do whatever you want,” you said, your voice tinged with a mix of irritation and exasperation.
You hoped for a reaction, a word, something that indicated he was willing to discuss the issue, but Aemond simply continued to stare ahead, his silence more stubborn than ever. You bit your lip, suppressing the urge to keep pressing the issue. You had no intention of arguing over something so trivial. Not here, not now, and certainly not over a minor courtly dance.
His jealousy seemed, at that moment, rather childish. You stood up firmly, adjusting your dress with a decisive gesture. There was no reason to prolong the discomfort of the situation, especially not in public. You decided that it was best to retreat to your room. If Aemond wanted to maintain that absurd attitude, you would not waste your energy discussing it at a banquet full of onlookers. Not for something so insignificant.
Aemond did not stop you, which irritated you even more. Without looking back, you left the hall. As you made your way through the torch-lit corridors, you felt the tension in your shoulders beginning to ease slightly. You repeated to yourself that distance would do you both good and that tomorrow, things would surely look clearer.
You reached your room, closing the door softly behind you, though more decisively than you had intended. Silence greeted you, and the tranquility you had longed for during the hectic night began to settle. You removed your jewelry with methodical movements, letting your thoughts drift away from the previous scene.
But the echo of your thoughts was soon interrupted when you heard the door open with an almost imperceptible sound. There was no need to turn around to know who it was. Aemond.
You turned slowly, finding him in the doorway, his expression a mix of wounded pride and barely contained regret. There was no need for immediate words; his presence said it all. He couldn't bear the idea of letting you go like this, just like that. And although he was a man who rarely apologized openly, you knew that his way of following you was, in itself, an acknowledgment that he had let jealousy overpower him.
"Are you going to say something?" you asked, keeping your gaze fixed on him. Your tone, though controlled, had enough acidity for him to know you weren't willing to let the matter pass easily.
Aemond stopped a few steps away from you, his gaze locked with yours, but the silence continued to fill the space between you both. He seemed to be torn between his pride and the desire to make things right, a tug-of-war that you knew all too well in him.
"What do you want me to say?" he finally murmured, his voice low but charged with barely disguised tension. "That I didn't care to see another man approaching you as if he had any right? That I should have stood idly by while he looked at you that way?"
You sighed, crossing your arms in front of you. "Aemond, it was a simple dance. Nothing more. You can't react like this every time someone speaks to me. This isn’t the battlefield, and not everyone is an enemy."
"A simple dance?" he retorted, taking another step toward you, his eyebrow raised. "I saw what I saw, and it wasn't just a dance. That man has no idea what respect means, and I'm not going to tolerate anyone even thinking they can..." He stopped, his words hanging in the air as he struggled to contain the rising heat of his temper.
"Can what?" you challenged, shaking your head, frustrated. "What do you think is going to happen, Aemond? That I’ll leave you for Lord Tarly? For a man I barely know and, to be honest, means absolutely nothing to me? You can’t keep acting as if any interaction is a threat to you."
For a moment, his eyes showed something more than jealousy: there was insecurity in his gaze, a shadow that he rarely revealed. You knew it wasn’t just a matter of wounded pride; there was something deeper affecting him.
"I can’t stand the idea..." he started to say, his voice softer now, almost broken, "that someone else might even imagine having your attention, your closeness. I’m a man of war, but with you... I don’t know how to handle this."
The echo of his words hit you hard, disarming any defenses you had built. Aemond, however fierce he was with people or in court, found himself lost when it came to expressing what he felt for you.
The echo of his words hit you hard, disarming any defenses you had built. Aemond, however fierce he was with people or in court, found himself lost when it came to expressing what he felt for you.
You looked at him for a moment, letting your shoulders drop, tired of the argument and knowing that despite everything, there was some truth in his fears. "You don’t have to handle anything. I’m not going anywhere, Aemond. I’m here, with you."
There was a silence loaded with emotion before he took the final step toward you, closing the space between you both. His hand slowly rose to your face, his fingers brushing your cheek with a tenderness that always surprised you in someone like him. "I’m sorry," he murmured, almost in a whisper, his gaze searching yours.
Before you could respond, his lips met yours in a kiss that, although starting softly, soon grew more intense, filled with a mixture of regret and need. Your hands clung to his clothes, responding with equal fervor, allowing the tension that had filled the space between you both to dissolve in that intimate moment.
When he pulled away, just a few inches, his eyes shone with a silent promise. "It won’t happen again," he assured, his forehead resting against yours. And in that moment, you knew that, as complicated as the emotions you shared were, you would always find your way back to each other.
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prodbyton · 6 months ago
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🎀cw. smut +18 mdni, dom!eunseok, situationship!eunseok, sub!reader, fem!reader, yn making eunseok jealous on purpose, yn is a little tipsy, degradation (barely), rough sex, protected sex (yay), other idols mentioned for plot hehe. not edited so if theres any errors look away :3
⭐️ wc. 3.5k (OOPS)
🎧 in the closet michael jackson
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“eunseok, what are you doing here?” you almost walked past him, doing a double take once you recognized the tall male resting on the wall of the crowded club.
“i could ask you the same thing,” he looks at you up and down, grinning slightly when you shifted under his gaze.
“im here with my friends”
“mhm, and where are they now?” he questions you when he realizes that no one he’s seen you around before was accompanying you through your stroll around the establishment, and knowing you were probably drunk he didn’t want a stranger to be the one to get your attention.
“wony left with her boyfriend, and ryujin is talking to some girl over there” you pout, moving closer to the boy and placing your hand on his shoulder, he looks down at your face then to where your hand rests, trying to get a good idea of your sobriety before he chooses how he’ll continue the conversation.
“feeling left out?” he raises a brow and you nod, hand going to his chest, playing with the lining of the leather jacket that covered his body that you were craving to see. “why don’t you go find some guys to hit on?”
“thats what i’m doing right now, isn’t it?” you look up at him, catching his eyes before he fights back a chuckle. you bite the inside of your lip, watching him react the way you like. getting him nervous was a skill only you had, no matter how he tried to fight it, he felt a shiver run through his body whenever you touched him.
“you’re drunk, y/n. lemme take you home?” he grabs your hand that drags from his chest to his shoulder soothingly. at least that’s what he tells himself, trying to ignore your attempts in seducing him.
“im not drunk, just horny” oh. he’s not surprised by your bluntness but its good to know you want him this bad in your sober state.
“i should get you home then. wait for me here while i bring my car around, pretty”
it was honestly perfect that eunseok was at the club at the same time as you, you planned on texting him when you were ready to leave. if you were lucky (like now,) you hoped he would take you back to your place or his and fuck you like he always did if you were in your right mind. sometimes you two wouldn’t even make it there and would just fuck in his car, you were too captivating for the boy and when you leave the house in your revealing outfits, how could he resist you? after all you called him of all people, and that fills his chest with pride.
after a night of drinking and dancing with other men, you would always call eunseok to take you home. the thought of you grinding on other men and possibly doing more with them while you weren’t under his supervision makes his skin crawl but he won’t admit it, you two aren’t together and its not his place. you just want a good fuck, and eunseok will always be there to give it to you.
once he’s out of your line of vision you try to find ryujin, going to let her know that you’re leaving and that you’re safe.
“your little boyfriend coming to get you again?” she gives you that look she always has when eunseok is the topic of conversation. there was more to your little arrangement with him that she was able to sense, even if you two deny it. the way he would spend the night with you after you two had sex, the way he would buy you food and anything else if you asked, the way he’s always conveniently free every friday night to come pick you up from whatever party or club you were at, he was always there. you two were friends with benefits, so he’s just being a good friend. a friend that fucks you absolutely stupid. a friend that looks at you with hearts in his eyes.
“he’s not my boyfriend, and he was already here, which saved me a desperate text” you roll your eyes and do a little shoulder dance, giving her a hint on what tonight’s activities will be.
“mhm, have fun babes”
you finally walk out of the doors, the brisk air of the night hitting your sweaty skin makes you shiver as you find eunseoks car. he leans on the door of the passengers seat, staring at everyone leaving the club and looking for you. he watches the way you walk to his car, studying your frame and focusing on the way your legs look in that dress. he also takes note of the way your face contorts in discomfort from your heels, making sure to remember to carry you up to your apartment once you two get there.
“you’ve officially hit #1 on my roster, for being such a gentleman” you joke as you stand in front of him, and he raises a brow.
“who was #1 before? and what was my ranking?”
“definitely in my top 10,” you pretend to think, getting eunseok riled up called for a great fucking once you got home. “and i’d say #1 was probably… sunwoo”
“baby, we both know sunwoo couldn’t possibly fuck you nearly as well as i do. and who do you call whenever you’re horny after a party?” he grabs your chin with his hand to keep your eyes on him, and you press your thighs together at his assertiveness. you almost have to hold back a whimper, he’s just so hot. “thought so. now get in the car, it’s cold”
the car ride was comfortable. eunseok let you have aux per usual, and he smiled to himself at the way you sang along to every song. he parks his car next to yours — a spot you reserved just for him, a spot you told him was just a regular guest space so it wouldn’t go to his head. so he wouldn’t get attached — and he runs to the passengers side of the car to open your door, and once you’re out of the car he’s picking you up. you yelp at the action but you’re thankful, your heels were staring to burn from the time you spent standing in your heels.
eunseok knows your apartment inside and out, in the darkness he’s able to navigate the two of you to your bedroom and place you delicately on your bed. you sit on the edge and lean on the palms of your hands while the boy turns on your bedside lamp, keeping the room at a comfortable brightness to keep you in the mood.
“look so pretty tonight baby, who were you trying to impress?” he lifts your leg to take off your shoes, caressing the skin of your calf as he slides them off your feet.
“sunwoo” theres a playful glint in your voice and eunseok stills. he gives you a look, one you know means that you pushed one of his buttons. you like that look, cuz it means he’s gonna fuck you into the mattress if you keep pressing it.
“wrong answer. wanna try again?” he smiles, giving you a chance to take back your (unfunny) joke.
“wanna fuck me?” you push your chest up into the air, and eunseok tsks at your behavior. you were so desperate for him, going as far as getting him jealous and irritated just so he can fuck you.
“keep acting like a brat and see where that gets you” he raises his brow as a warning, and you think now you’ll drop your little bratty act and be a good girl for him, but why not push his buttons one more time?
“gets me far with sun-” you can barely get his name out when eunseok his pushing your thighs open and leaving a sharp slap on the skin of your inner thigh, causing you to yelp. he keeps his hand there as he brings his body down so his lips are by your ear and you shiver, his thigh just an inch away from your core. you want to shift your body so you can make contact, but eunseoks fingers are digging into your thigh to hold you down.
“don’t know why you like pissing me off, just wanna get fucked like a slut, huh?” his words go through your ear and straight to your clit, and you have to once again stop yourself from whimpering.
“want it so bad, seok”
he hums, finally deciding to give you what you want. his lips attach to your neck, leaving hungry open mouthed kisses across the skin while his hand grips your thigh tighter. his other hand is traveling up your waist up your your chest. he gropes your tits, and you sigh at the feeling of his fingers making contact with your nipple. he doesn’t say anything to you, just groping your body.
taking his mouth off of your neck, he removes both hands off your body and you whine at the loss. he takes in your already fucked out state, smiling to himself at how easy it was to get you worked up. he pushes your body down onto the bed, not too rough but hard enough for your weak body to fall easily. thats before he grabs your waist hard, flipping you onto your stomach.
“ass up, baby” he taps your thigh, and you quickly find your balance to sit on your knees, keeping your face in the pillows how he likes. he mutters a good girl while he lets his hand lay on the swell of your ass, bringing it down the arch in your back before bringing it back up. he repeats the action, this time letting his fingers catch the fabric of the tight dress you wore, bringing it down so it bunches up at your stomach. he groans at the pretty lace panties you wore under your dress, wet patch prominent on them as you wiggle your ass in the air as a hint you want him to touch you.
“you made a mess in your panties” he coos at you as his fingers slowly hook onto the hem of the garment, pulling it down and seeing the string of your arousal that clung to you. you whine, pushing your face deeper into the pillow in embarrassment. eunseok really was the only one who could make you like this — completely soaked through your panties and have you so submissive despite your fiery personality. your pride and common sense left your body when it came to him. you didn’t care how stupid you looked begging for attention from a man who wasn’t even your boyfriend, you didn’t care how your friends would tell you to leave him alone if you two weren’t going to make it official, you couldn’t care when he was always there for you regardless of your arrangement, you couldn’t care when he makes you feel this good even when he’s barely touching you.
he brings his thumb to your core, gathering the slick thats dripping out of you before pushing it inside of you and you gasp, body jolting at the contact. he takes his thumb out of you and drags it down to your clit, pressing on the nub forcing a moan out of you. his finger circles your clit a few times and you can feel yourself getting wetter, and your body feels hot.
you grind against his finger, and he presses harder. “just fuck me already”
“gotta stretch you out first pretty girl,”
“dont care, want- need you now” eunseok groans at your eagerness. he knows how much you struggle to take him fully if he doesn’t prep you first, but with you pissing him off all night maybe you can struggle a bit.
he steps off the bed to get himself undressed, nearly tripping as he steps out of his pants. he grabs his wallet out of his jean pocket and pulls out a condom, tearing the packet open with his teeth and sliding the condom on. he hisses, he hasn’t touched his cock at all this whole night, too focused on how jealous he was and helping get you off.
getting back on the bed, he pumps himself a few times before placing his hand on your ass, lining up his cock with your hole. he presses in slightly, tip prodding at your entrance but not enough for you to feel him.
“seok-”
“show me how bad you want it” grabbing a fistful of your ass, he lets go to bring his hand back down harshly on the skin. you cry out, body jerking forward before eunseok is holding you in place.
you move your arms into a better position, moving your head from off the pillow so you could look behind you. you rest on your elbows, bringing one arm behind you so you could reach eunseok. the tip of his cock was so close to pushing inside of you, and when you push back onto him it almost gets fully swallowed by your wet heat. without his support its hard for you to get him inside of you fully and you whine, pushing back harder onto him in an attempt to get him inside of you.
he wants to laugh and tell you how pathetic you look trying to fuck yourself on him, dick not even inside you and you’re moaning. he wants to tease you and tell you that this is why he preps you. wordlessly, he pushes his tip inside of you fully. the both of you let out sounds of pleasure as your cunt takes him in.
it takes you a minute to relax around him, letting him push all the way inside of you. you feel so full, the pain from the stretch subsiding and you crave more. you move forward, letting him slide out of you almost completely until just the tip is inside of you before you press your ass to him, squeezing around his cock as he bottoms out again. your body trembles under his hold, the way he stays still with his hands on your ass, and he grips the flesh tighter each time you move.
he lets you get yourself off on his cock, giving you words of encouragement to keep going and slapping your ass each time your pace faltered. you felt like you were on cloud nine, but it still wasn’t enough. you couldn’t get him deep enough, and you weren’t moving fast enough for your own and his liking.
“fuck me, eunseok”
that's all he needed to move one of his arms to push your lower body back into the mattress, grabbing both your arms to put them behind your back and snap his hips forward. he fucks you with purpose, your body is weak under him as he builds a fast pace. you can feel the way his dick stretches you out with each pull, and you can’t help the way you clench around him each time his hips kiss the skin of your ass.
“pussy so tight for me, just for me right?” he lets his jealousy peek through, moaning and leaning over you to press his cock deeper inside of you. your eyes roll to the back of your head at the sensation, you open your mouth to moan but nothing comes out.
“yes, just for you- all for you” your voice is slightly muffled by the pillow, but eunseok can hear you and he’s satisfied with your answer. he thrusts harder, and you can feel the pressure of your orgasm building up in your stomach. “close, so close”
he could feel it, he knows once you can barely keep your eyes open and you cant let out any sounds that you’re going to cum soon, like you’re holding your breath anticipating the orgasm he’ll be forcing out of you.
except he’s not fucking you anymore. he’s pulled out of you and let your body fall limp against the mattress, body trembling and the shock of being deprived of sweet realease finally comes over you. your tense muscles stop you from sitting up and grabbing at him, all you can do is turn your body around so you’re on your back, weak no’s and please leave your mouth as eunseok watches you.
denying you an orgasm was evil, he knew it. but you deserved it tonight. and honestly, he was going to cum soon as well and needed a breather. he can never last long when he fucks you from behind, and fucking you in that dress — that goddamn dress you wore tonight, he swears he would’ve taken you in front of everyone in that club.
once he feels like he’s tortured you enough, he spreads your legs open, inching closer to you and lifting one of your legs over his shoulder. he holds onto the flesh of your thigh tight, and he uses his other hand to guide his cock back into your hole. it’s quick, and you almost scream with how deep he feels in this position.
he’s so pretty, focused on where your bodies connect as he finds the pace that makes you react the best. you stare at his face, the way it contorts in pleasure as he tries to get you to your peak. then you look at the way the muscles on his stomach contract, how you see his toned stomach glisten in the dim light of your room each time he pushed back into you.
“this pretty pussy is all for me right?” his free hand moves to your clit and you moan loudly as his fingers rub tight circles around the swollen bud. your throat was dry as you tried to get a word out.
“y-yours, seok-” you had a hand in the sheets, fingers turning white as the other goes to the back of eunseoks neck. you hold him close to your face, body bending almost uncomfortably but you felt too good to care.
“you like when i fuck you like this?” his words were warm against your lips, eyes locked in on yours as he talked to you. you were so close you could almost taste it.
“love it, love your cock, love it so mu-mngh” you were cut off by a rough kiss to your lips, his tongue swirling in your mouth once before he pulled away, face still close to yours as he looked in your eyes.
“i love you”
shit. fuck.
you didn't have enough time to process the words that left his lips before you were cumming, moaning right in eunseoks face and he pressed his lips to yours again. you tried your best to kiss back but your vision was going blurry and you were fading in and out of consciousness. he lifts his body up so he can fuck you faster, fingers still on your clit as your pussy spasmed around him. his orgasm hit him not too long after, hips stilling while he filled the condom up with his cum.
he took his fingers off you, pulling out of you and letting your body rest for a moment before he has to clean you up. he sits there, realizing that he just told you he loves you mid fuck. he doesn’t know what he should do — nothing he could say could help his case. what if you don't feel the same way? what if you did but he says the wrong thing? he doesn’t want to fuck this up. he’d rather have you like this than to not have you at all.
you were asleep now, eunseok wiped his face with his hands before getting up. he rid himself of the condom he wore and got a towel to clean you up with, shushing you softly when you whimper at the sensitivity. he put his boxers back on before walking out of your room, making way to your kitchen to get you some water. he sits you up and makes you drink it, telling you that you were so good for him and that you need your rest.
once you both were cleaned up, eunseok gets into bed with you and spoons you under the covers. before you let your fatigue take over, you let your brain recover the words said before you blanked out.
“did you mean it?” your voice was soft, a part of you hoped the boy was still awake, so he could tell you what he meant. but another part of you wished he was still asleep, you didn’t want to bear the emotions of being rejected right before you went to sleep. not while he was still here, in bed with you.
“of course i meant it. now go to sleep, pretty girl. we’ll talk in the morning”
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a/n: when i tell yall this was supposed to be at most 1.5k but i got carried away… eunseok makes me crazy. i hope you guys enjoyed it <33
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x-hotoke · 5 months ago
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﹕ BROTHERLY BOND
Slight Yandere! Gojo Satoru x M! Reader | platonic
writer's notes: might make a part 2 on this but I'm not really sure. But maybe I will or not. Requests are also open !
synopsis: Y/n gets sent to a mission by their sensei; Gojo Satoru who supervises him.
warnings: Yandere themes, delusional gojo, obsessive themes, degradation. Use of he/him
credits to the owner of the drawings above ↑
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Y/n, a first grade sorcerer from Tokyo Jujutsu High. He was on his way to their home room with Yuji trailing behind him. “Hey — wait up.” Yuji said trying to keep up his pace with the other.
“Oh — sorry.” Y/n mutters, stopping to look over his shoulder. Yuji smiles at him. “No worries, let's go!” He grinned, patting his shoulder.
Y/n nodded, walking behind the energetic pink haired boy. The two of them weren't technically close because of his under the weather personality and yuji is somewhat energetic and vocal but they try their best for their conversations to not be awkward, keyword; try.
The hallways were lit by the light outside as they walked, stopping at a wooden sliding door. Yuji was the first one to enter the classroom with y/n hesitating. He felt his stomach start to churn, it only happens whenever something bad is about to occur. He brushed it off as hunger since he didn't eat earlier this morning.
He went inside seeing his sensei and other friends. Gojo perked up seeing the young sorcerer enter the homeroom, standing up properly and putting his hands inside his pockets. “Since everyone else is here, let's start!” He grins.
Y/n sat down next to Nobara who greeted him. “Good morning, Y/n.” She smiled at the younger male. “Good morning to you too, Nobara.” He returned the smile to her.
“Alright listen up, my students!” Gojo sang the last bit, grinning. Clapping his hands to get their attention like a kindergarten teacher trying to get little kids to pay attention to them and it worked.
“Most of you did absolutely well during your last missions yet..” He trailed off, his eyes that are being covered by a blindfold glances at y/n. “One of you did hm.. how do I say it?” He tapped a finger on his chin, seemingly deep in thought.
The two—nobara and yuji—were nervous except megumi and y/n, they both knew they successfully nailed their missions without any casualties except for megumi, he encounters a bunch of curses at the same time. “Terrible? Disappointing? No no.. bad!” He snickered at how nervous the two were.
“Gojo-Sensei!” Nobara and Yuji cried out, hugging each other with yuji wrapping his arms around her neck, the respectful man that he is, he doesn't want to be called a pervert or anything of sorts by Nobara! “Please — just tell us! Even if the truth hurts” Yuji dramatically said, placing the back of his hand on his forehead as comical tears run down his face.
Gojo smirked, he lifted his hand — pointing towards Y/n who stiffens up, staring at the hand of his sensei. “Y/n-kun! I must say that I'm quite disappointed!” He placed his hands on his hips shaking his head as if he was his parent.
“What!?” Nobara shouted, his mouth agape looking over to the younger sorcerer. “But Gojo-Sensei, Y/n has been doing extremely well-” Yuji butted in but got shot down by Satoru.
“Ah-ah! No buts!” He sighs, the smile plastered on his face on a daily basis, finds its way back. The sorcerer knew that he has been doing fantastic with the missions he's been receiving and it frustrated him because he can't play the hero for his self-proclaimed brother once.
“You’ll be going on a mission, supervised by the one and only — strongest sorcerer, me! To make up for it of course” He cheered, clasping both of his hands together with flowers floating around him, it quickly dispersed when Y/n chimed in.
“Gojo-Sensei — I think there has been a misunderstanding. I successfully exorcised every curse that I encountered during my missions.” He said, looking at the white haired male. He clenches his pants in his hands. “Did I?..” He muttered, questioning himself.
“Technically speaking — ye- no?.. But besides the point, I'll be supervising you to check if you do in fact do well.”
Y/n grumbles, cursung under his breath before looking at the desk in front of him. “And what type of curse will I be fighting against?” He questioned the older male.
“A special grade curse!” Silence overtook the entire room whilst Gojo shifted his eyes looking at every one of them with a grin on his face.
“WHAT?”
“Oh.. I'm gonna die.” Y/n whispered, tugging on his hair sweating furiously. He slammed his head on the table.
“Isn’t that too much, Gojo-Sensei?” Megumi spoke up, squinting his eyes at their teacher who waved off his concern. “It’s fine! Plus he has me.” Gojo posed, sticking his tongue out. The black haired male knew of his obsession over the sorcerer who was the same age as him yet a higher grade level than him. He knew of satoru's twisted delusional plan yet he didn't interfere knowing the white haired male wouldn't be too happy.
“Still he can't fight— fight a special grade.” Megumi argued.
“I appreciate your concern for - y/n but he's a first grade sorcerer, he can handle it just fine.”
Their glare to each other was intense, not one of them backing down like it was some competition they intend to win — it was like they were communicating through their eyes. A hand patted megumi's shoulder making him look over to y/n who held a nervous smile. “It’s fine — really, gumi’.” He said, taking a deep breath.
“Y/n can't die!”
“He has so much to live for!”
Nobara and yuji cried as they hugged the boy tightly, sniffling. “I’m not dying — I think.” Y/n muttered.
“You think!?”
“Alright that's enough.” Gojo sighs, grabbing the two's collar and lifting them up away from the first grade sorcerer. “Other than that, you're all free to go! Oh and y/n, meet me at 7 pm outside the gates.” He grinned, throwing the two on the floor before skipping towards the door with his hands outstretched, pink flowers surrounding his figure as he giggled away from them.
Y/n deadpanned, shaking his head. “I guess, I need to prepare?..” He stood up, the chair behind him falling backwards as he lazily walked up to the sliding door.
“Y/n! Let's hang out before you die!” Yuji shouted, smiling before getting smacked by the back of his head by megumi who glared at him. “He’s not going to die.” He claimed, looking down at his feet.
“It’s not like Gojo-sensei will let him.” He whispered causing Yuji to look up at him confused. “Did you say something, megumi?” He asked, scratching the back of his head.
The said male shook his head, following the rest to where they are headed.
“Oh! Oh we should go on a shopping spree with gojo-sensei's credit card!” Nobara suggested, stars forming in her eyes as she stared at the sky thinking of how much clothes she can buy with their sensei's card.
“What about we go to a cafe instead?..” Y/n nervous giggled, pulling the two other males. Once they got there, they sat down at the four seater table near the window. “fuwaa! look at those shops.” Nobara pressed her hands in the window, ranting about them.
Megumi stood up. “I’ll go ahead and order our usuals.” He nodded before going to the counter. Y/n was left with Yuji — who was sitting beside nobara — and her. 'this is going to be a long day..' He thought.
A few hours went by and it was time for y/n and satoru to go. “waa! don’t die on us, Y/n!” Yuji cried out, slapping his cheek when a mouth appeared. “Sukuna..” Y/n muttered under his breath, sweatdropping at the pink haired male who was beating his face to get rid of the extra mouth. Sukuna was spewing in about how the h/c haired boy will die in a gruesome and painful way, laughing before Yuji punched the mouth.
“It’s time for us to go now, Y/n." Satoru said passing by the group, opening the back seat door. The young sorcerer got in and he did as well. The car ride made y/n almost pass out but he tried not to fall asleep. Satoru kept his eyes on him the entire ride towards the destination.
“We're here!” Satoru skipped towards the gate of the abandoned school, it made y/n shiver just by looking at it. He was going to find the special grade there?
Nonetheless he followed the blindfolded man, the gates were already open and the conditions of it were bad, rust and mold were on the metal.
The surrounding area was pitch black. It scared y/n but satoru was going with him right?
“Now go inside! I must warn you that this curse is very very strict and that's probably why it chose to be here.” Satoru said, scratching his chin. He was hinting that the curse was a teacher of sorts in this abandoned school.
“Aren’t you coming along, sensei?..” Y/n looks at him desperately.
Satoru pretended to think before giggling. “No but I'll still be able to look after you throughout the entire school.” He grinned, pushing the young sorcerer inside the dark entrance.
“Wait — wait! Sensei!” Y/n breath hitched as he was pushed inside the school. He heard the door shut close and a click, his hand fumbled inside his pocket — pulling out his phone and turning the flash light on. He breathed out heavily, feeling his stomach churn again.
Maybe this was a sign to leave.
Yet Y/n was determined, taking small steps around the hallways. It terrified him to the core, the curse might pop out at any given time. He sighs in relief seeing the hallways with the windows lit up by the two lamp posts outside. He went upstairs, holding back a shout when he stepped on a dead rat, a shiver ran down his body, continuing to go to the second floor hallways.
He began to think about the curse; was it roleplaying as a teacher? If he made enough ruckus in the hallways would it come out considering satoru told him that it was strict. But then again, what he's fighting is a special grade curse. He needs to be extra careful—
Y/n felt a shiver run down his spine as everything felt heavy all of the sudden, he turned around seeing the curse or teacher inhumane face directly in front of his. He screamed in terror, jumping back. He was careful enough to not drop the phone — gojo bought for him.
It shrieked making some of the lockers drop on the floor, y/n gritted his teeth preparing to use his curse technique.
Gojo stood outside the school on a phone call. “I’m going to send the money later, I’m busy supervising my brother on a mission.” He cut the woman off. On the other side of the call, mei mei raised both of her brows hearing the word 'brother'. She didn't know he had one. He hung up the phone before she could reply, twirling it around his fingers.
He heard a loud shriek — that rumbled the ground — coming from inside the school, smirking. He slowly approached the entrance doors.
Meanwhile Y/n got thrown across the hallway, he groans before standing up to see the curse infront of him already. He barely dodged the attack by crouching down and side stepping trying to get away from the angered curse. “Fuck—where's gojo-sensei when you need him!?” he sneered, outstretching his arms in front of him.
Thread manipulation.
A few translucent threads came out of his finger tips as he prepared to use his curse technique. He made the end of the threads sharp, extremely sharp. He reeled his arms back before launching it forward. The threads travelled quickly to the special grade curse, piercing its body.
Y/n breathed heavily, this was consuming his energy and he didn't like that one bit. The curse broke the threads quickly making him panic because it was limited. “Fuck—” that was the last thing he said before staring up to see the leg of the special grade curse, it was going to slam him to the ground. Time seemingly was in slow motion. 'am I going to die here?' He thought.
A small crater was made, the floor was slightly shattered and the ceiling was close to falling, dust particles float around. Y/n felt the air knocked out of him, he was lucky the curse didn't thrust it's foot further into his stomach or else he would've had died.
Y/n rolled over, a rock hitting his side making him wince in pain, dogding another attack from the curse. He hoped that it wouldn't execute its domain too early, knowing his was weaker since he just started to learn a few months ago.
He stumbled into getting up, a few of his threads broke meaning he only has limited use against the special grade. “Curse technique: bindin—” The curse slammed its fist to y/n's stomach — resulting him into being thrown back, making a hole on the wall of the school.
Blood came out of his mouth as he rolled on the cemented ground, the impact made his head spin. He was going to die, tears slowly built up in his eyes. He was breathing hard, looking up at the wall seeing the curse walking up slowly to it, trying to find him.
Y/n tried to stand up, wincing as pain shot up in his shoulder. “fuck— that's fractured for sure.” he whispered, he stood up shakily. Lifting his hands towards the hole in the wall, making a web of barriers — using all of his threads — he sat down.
Y/n perked up, looking up beside him. “Gojo-sensei!” he shouted seeing the white haired man next to him looking ever so relaxed. He lazily waved to him before looking at the barrier he made. “Can't fight anymore?” he hummed.
“That's some cool barrier you did there.” Satoru didn't wait for a reply, seeing the threads get snapped as the curse ripped it one by one. He stepped forward getting in front of y/n. “Only a matter of time before it snaps.” He shrugged.
“You can take a few more hits, right?" Leaning forwards, and tilting his head as if he was mocking him. Y/n shook his head, feeling the pain from his shoulder intensifying. “Ah that's too bad then.” Satoru pouted, standing up properly. He looked over his shoulder. “I'm impressed that the barrier is holding up pretty well. That's just because that stupid curse isn't smart enough to break the wall beside the barrier." He chuckles at his own words.
“You can deal with it right, y/n?”
“Wait—please- help me, I can't- I'm gonna die- you told me that- you'll 'elp me!”
“Nah, you look just fine!” Satory mocked him, analyzing his appearance. His mouth and nose were covered in blood, his uniform ripped in some places. Hair tangled by the mix of blood and rocks. It made his head ache.
“No — gojo-sensei, I'm- I'm gonna pass out at this rate.” He stuttered out, closing his eyes trying to stay conscious for a bit longer. “Too bad, I'm only here to supervise and not intervene.” Gojo grins sinisterly.
“Gojo-sensei—.”
Gojo shushed him, kneeling in front of the sorcerer. “I’m kidding, I'm kidding.” He chuckled before continuing. “Now isn't this a sight to see.” He said sarcastically. It was time for him to play the hero. He lifted his hand and caressed his hair. “Did you even manage to get a hit?” He shook his head chuckling.
“Don't worry, Y/n.. I'll take good care of you. I wouldn't be a good brother if I didn't right?” He tilted his head again, he was getting impatient, cupping y/n's face with his hands to make the h/c headed male look at him. Someone can call him a sadist for being happy to see him beaten up and pleading desperately for him to help but he doesn't care. “A weak and pathetic excuse of a sorcerer, you are brother.”
“I- gojo-sensei..” Y/n's ear rang, his eyes unfocused and blurry. “What?..” Then his head plopped forward, passed out. The said male stared at him for a second before standing up from his position and turning around to confront the curse who broke out of the barrier. He grinned. “You sure did rough him up, hm?”
“Don't worry, I’ll make this quick and painful.” Satoru said, stretching his arms out and legs. He stood up, lazily lifting his arm. Pointing a finger at the curse who looked confused, a red void appears on his finger in a circular shape.
“Curse technique reversal: Red.”
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echantedtoon · 2 months ago
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Demonstober Day 6 Kitsune
Kitsune, trickster foxes from traditional Japanese folklore. They are a type of yōkai, a class of supernatural creatures with godlike powers, often equated to the English ghoul or demon. Kitsune are noted for their paranormal abilities, particularly metamorphosis. As they age, these abilities can become more powerful.
Tagging: @lavenderdropp @six-eyed-samurai @trancylovecraft @shadyd3ar @cherrysuzaku
@nousija
Remember if you want to be added to the spooktober taglist lemme know
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A young lady's wedding day.
It's supposed to be the happiest day of her life ever.
And to be fair, your wedding was a good one. Hilarious too. However only because your dancing husband sprouted a pair of fluffy ears and nine tails while dancing to music after the ceremony much to the horrified looks of all the other guests as not one but three Kitsune spirits had infiltrated the ceremony and were now chuckling at their mischief making.
"How did this happen?," they cried in fear watching them dance and cackle around you.
It was quite simple really. It started with a hello. A hello from one child to another. Long ago back when you were very little, and your Aunt was the shrine maiden to the local Kitsune shrine. You went there all the time to play under her supervision and run through the trees and splash in the small stream in the back. Plenty of hiding places to find and new things to explore. On one of these escapades you bounded down the stone path and up to where your aunt was cleaning up the inside of the shrine, with some baked sweet potatoes to leave as offerings in hopes the spirits will continue to bring good fortune. But there was something new about the shrine today and it was the child sitting upon the steps to the shrine about your age. 
He played upon the stone steps with a small stick throwing it up and then catching it again over and over. He didn't even look at you as you toddled up to him with the basket and just stared at him continuing to play by himself until you spoke.
"What game are you playing?"
The boy let out a fox like yip in surprise before whirling around to stare at you wide eyed. It was only then your child eyes realized that he had giant fluffy ears on his head amongst his wild blonde hair and a bristled up tail behind him. However in your child innocence, those details went right over your head. Meanwhile the boy stared at you in absolute shock.
"You can see me?!"
"Duh. You're standing right in front of me, Silly," you giggled as he blinked again. The stick he was playing with falling to the ground with a thud.
His face scrunched up before making a motion for you to shoo. "Well stop seeing me. You're not supposed to be seeing me!"
"But why?"
"Because my father says so! Humans aren't supposed to be able to see us unless we want them too and I don't want you to."
"But why doesn't he want me to see you?"
"Uuuuhh...I dunno. I never asked."
"Y/n? Is that you?" Your aunt walked out of the shrine with a broom in her hand blinking. "Who are you talking to?"
You smiled pointing to your friend. "My friend!"
You aunt seemed to stare right past the boy as if she couldn't see him before chuckling. "Oh. A friend. And would this friend happen to be imaginary?"
"Nu uh! We were just talking about his stick game!"
Your aunt laughed at you before turning away. "Sure you were. You better bring those offerings in here before an animal makes off with them."
"Ok!"
"I'm your friend?"
You looked back to the strange boy. "Do you wanna be?"
He lit up brightly. "SURE! I never had a friend before!" He sniffed around before looking at the basket. "Are those sweet potatoes?"
"Want one?"
"Yes please!" You held out the basket and he immediately took one, taking a large bite. "UMAI!"
You two had lots of fun together playing games and watching him perform small tricks with fire. No one was the wiser to his true nature only passing him off as your imaginary friend. It didnt matter in the moment. You both were just children at play. One day your friend brought someone new to play with you both. His toddler younger brother who was the spitting image of his older brother but smaller and cuter. You didn't mind. That just meant you had two friends now! Playing tricks on each other was a favorite past time for them. Harmless little games like keep away or throwing mud or even sneaking up and scaring you. 
However the day you met a third person like your friends was the day those around you started to worry with horror in their minds.
"Hey! You wanna come home with me?", your friend asked you one day. 
You looked up from the frog his little brother was poking at and blinked. "Your home?"
He nodded before pointing at the gate that you had to cross under on your way to the shrine. "It's just through there! Normal people can't come in, but I can take you and you can see my really cool house!" 
"I don't know. My aunt won't like it if Im not back before sundown."
"I'll bring you back way before dinner time!"
"Well ok. Let me tell my aunt first!"
You did but the adult laughed it off as a cute little interaction between a child and her imaginary friends. She didn't even notice how your friends took you by the hands and lead you under the gateway, disappearing into the air without a trace.
Your eyes were filled with amazement at the sights of a beautiful mansion. Way more beautiful than the shrine your aunt took care of. It was beautifully structured and seemed to be straight out of a fantasy. More so was the two people sat up on the front deck of the building. A man who looked exactly like your friends, only older and instead of one fluffy tail there was nine majestic long ones splayed out behind him. And a woman who didn't look much older than your aunt at the time. Both looked up at the incoming children but completely paused up on seeing you getting pulled towards them.
"Mother! Father! Look! We brought home Y/n!," you friend announced gesturing to you. "She can see us and cross the gates!"
"What?! She's real? I thought you both were making up something again like that mermaid," the older man barked but his face still looked surprised to see the young girl before him. 
"Nuh uh! And Tengen is too real too! You just haven't met him yet either!"
He ignored the boy in exchange for staring at you up and down. "So...You can see my kids huh? What's your name?"
"I'm Y/n! You look ready fluffy, Mister!"
"He IS fluffy! Father's tails are the perfect napping spot! You should try it sometime!"
The man sputtered and shot the woman an embarrassed look as she chuckled. "Well this is a surprise. Do you children want some mochi? I made some fresh from the oven."
"YAY!! Mochi!"
You didn't know how long you stayed exactly running around and playing with your friends but eventually it was time for you to go home. Instructing you to just cross back through the gate and you'd be right back home. However before you left, your friend gave you a smile. 
"Y/n, when we're all grown up I'm going to marry you!"
"Ew! Like kissing and stuff? Yuck! That's so gross! No thanks!"
"Yes I will! Just you wait and see!" 
When you came back you were met with quite a sight. At least twelve people including your aunt and parents was sweeping throughout the shrine and nearby woods now staring in shock at the girl who suddenly appeared out of thin air. Everyone stared at you stunned by the fact before demanding that you tell them where you were. And your innocent self did. 
From your friend's home to playing and having so much fun! While you happily smiled, the others looked on in horror. You hadn't just been seeing an imaginary friend but a real spirit who had already set his sights upon yourself. 
It's why you were so sad when your aunt banned you from the shrine anymore and a few weeks after your parents sent you far away to live with your grandparents. You didn't understand why? Did you do anything wrong? You were happy where you were.
But all things fade.
Years passed. You grew up and had forgotten most of what happened with your childhood. Convincing yourself too it was all just pleasant childhood memories. You grew up, moved on, and began starting you own life. Working away on your grandparents small farm until a knock came to your door one day. You all answered it to quite a sight indeed.
A man was standing on the other side but he had very unusual striking features. Firey blonde hair that faded to red at the tips and a pair of striking flaming eyes to match. He stood proud and tall in the doorway staring down at your surprised grandparents with the politest of smiles.
"GREETINGS!!," He greeted in a booming voice making you all jolt at the sheer volume. "Is this the L/n residence perchance?"
"Y-Yes. Who are you?"
*I am Kyojuro Rengoku and I am here to court your granddaughter!"
The announcement so bold and blunt was very off guard. It stunned you all but the man, Kyojuro, was so very polite. He asked to come in, complimenting your home, and even asked for permission from both yourself and your grandparents to start courting you. Your grandmother unsurprisingly jumped to an immediate yes whilst your grandfather was more reluctant..but agreed after seeing him produce a small gold bracelet as a courting gift. It was a plain gold band, not even with gems or patterns, but the fact that it was a GOLD bracelet said something about his wealthy status. You however were more taken aback by everything and...
Why did this man seem so familiar to you?
You asked him that very question and he was happy to answer. "A long time ago we met as children! You probably don't remember me as we were very young but I remembered you!"
That wasn't too far out there and it explained the deja vu but there was... something else you couldn't put your mind on. And he was very honest about everything you all asked if him.
Why did he want to marry you? "I liked you from the moment we met long ago! Your personality is still the one I want!" What did his family do? "We have an estate not far from here! It even has a shrine sitting upon it!" Oh. So his family runs a shrine? "Partially!" 
That explained the wealth you guessed. Well he didn't seem that bad so you accepted his courtship with your grandparents' approval! It was a beautiful relationship. Kyojuro was everything a girl would want in a husband. Kind, compassionate, understanding, respectful- If the word perfect was a human then Kyojuro was it. He was also very playful... However you couldn't help but feel strange whenever you heard him laugh or crack small jokes. It was like you were reliving some forgotten about past ..but you couldn't put your finger on it. Oh well.
All that matters what that you fell heads over heels for this man so when he asked you to marry him, you didn't hesitate to say yes! It was perfect. The planning was perfect and you were able to chose whatever you wanted. However Kyojuro only wanted one thing-
"I want our wedding to take place at the Fox shrine in your hometown."
"Huh? Why?"
"It's a good meeting spot for both our families since it's right in the middle between them! And it's a sacred place to me, so I'd really like to have it there."
Well you didn't have any objections to that, and neither did your aunt when you sent her a message asking about it. Plus you didn't think anything of it. Just that you were going to be getting married to the man you loved, your family would be there, and you were going to meet his family too! It was the perfect story scene out of a fairytale.
Nothing went wrong at all. The travel back home was pleasant. Kyojuro swept the rest of your family off their feet the same smiling way he did your grandparents. You got to meet his little brother and parents..whom while we're very polite, ignited another round of deja vu that you ultimately brushed off as the nerves getting to you. 
The ceremony was so beautiful. 
You cried three times throughout that you just gave up on trying to make sure your make up was good. Not that your husband seemed to mind, holding your hand as you cried and just kepr telling you how beautiful you were. It was only after-
After the ceremony.
The exact second after he officially became your husband.
You heard him give off a noise. A sound like the small giggles of a fox. That's when you looked at his smile. Perfectly white teeth were replaced with fangs and two large ears sprung up on the tops of his head as he looked at you grinning.
The first shriek from a woman bled out into the opening as the spirit sprung up, tails swaying and a wide smile on his face as the humans screamed in horror at the trickery he managed to pull over on them. You stared shocked as spirits danced humans screamed out in terror and fled from the smiling Yokai and you were only left there to watch in shock and slightly fear at the mischievous grin wide in front of your face.
"..Why?"
"Because, Little Flame.~ To trick the trickster is to be rectified by the greatest deceivement in return."
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hurtspideyparker · 6 months ago
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Tony can't handle his emotions properly and his love for Peter ends up pushing him away.
Peter gets severely injured on patrol and hides it from Tony, but Karen overrides his command and informs Friday/Tony that Peter is in danger.
Tony flies out and saves Peter's life, but once Peter is in the tower safe and coherent Tony starts yelling at him, furious and upset; Peter doesn't even get a chance to thank him before he's bombarded with the scathing tone, turning him defensive.
The older's anger comes from a place of fear of losing Peter. Tony wasn't allowed to show fear growing up; in front of his father, Obadian, the press, Stark Industries shareholders... and later on it kept him safe in front of his captors, his enemies. Tony was taught with anger, and doesn't know how to express the softness inside him any other way.
His misconstruction of the protectiveness he feels only makes Peter more upset.
"This is why I didn't wanna tell you, you'd just get mad again! Maybe I should just get rid of this stupid suit if you're just gonna keep spying on me all the time."
"You would have been DEAD if Karen wasn't smart enough to override your commands, you would have been dead without me or that suit!"
"I would have figured it out, I always figure it out. I don't wanna depend on you constantly! All I do is bother you, and make you upset. I'm sick of being a chore, like I'm some stupid kid who needs rescuing all the time. When I didn't have you I was fine!"
Tony scoffs, "when you didn't have me you were playing pretend in pajamas. This is why you need training wheels, hell you probably need adult supervision. You're lucky I even let you go out-"
"You're not my dad!"
Tony pauses. He stares at Peter, who's chest pumps furiously from his heavy breathing, a hand holding his side where his bullet wound resides.
The sight of bandages on Peter's young frame makes Tony dizzy. He's reminded once again how close he was to losing Peter today, how much thread would have been cut short from the spindle of his life. He looks so small in the hospital bed, almost frail despite his enhanced muscular body.
His cheeks are stained red from anger. He's pale, too pale, a sheen of sweat on the frowning wrinkles of upset brows.
Bed rest, relaxed environment, taking it easy.
Tony feels sick.
"I can't be here right now," he tells the boy without making eye contact, turning and leaving the room.
The automatic glass doors slide shut behind him with a woosh. He stands still for a second to catch his own breath. What is he thinking, acting like the kid's parent? He's right, he can do whatever he wants. Tony can't ground him, has no right to control him. This isn't his problem.
Tony takes his phone out to inform Peter's Aunt May of what happened and to tell Happy to pick her up. The doctor said Peter needed to stay here for at least a few hours, even with his enhanced healing.
Bed rest, relaxed environment, taking it easy.
Tony glances up through the glass for a moment.
Peter is lying back down, one hand still resting on his wound as if he's holding himself together, the other gripping his own arm with a furious handprint. If he could he'd probably be crossing his arms while huffing and puffing, petulant in his solitude.
His free hand suddenly moves to his face, the back wiping across his eyes and cheeks before his palm brushes up the underside of his nose. His shoulders shake with a sniffle and his hand comes back glistening in the sterile lighting.
He's crying.
Anger bubbles up in Tony again, familiar yet now aimed inwards. If any other person had hurt Peter Tony wouldn't hesitate to tear them a new one.
Maybe that's the problem.
Tony refuses to go back into that room. Not when he does that to Peter, not when his wrath is still bubbling under his skin, cracking the delicate glass that bridges his relationships.
So he leaves Peter alone, and thinks - maybe this is better for both of them.
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blednokrov · 1 year ago
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I've been having lots of fun designing random OP fusions for a hypothetical AU where people can fuse... Feel free to drop a combo of any two Strawhats in my asks for me to draw a fusion of them (I'm only reading impel down rn so please no spoilers)
More on these:
Mickey (Nami + Franky) - ultimate Big Sibling fusion. She's very balanced in her sense of responsibility, desire to take other under her wing and general "fun but let's keep it sane and safe" vibe. One of favorite fusions of Strawhats as her appearance often means "supervised fun that is otherwise strongly off limits" and they just love her in general. Overall, Mickey's cool, fun and sexy (and not allowed in many public places because she only wears bikini swimsuits). He fights with electrocution.
Didja miss me? Well, now you can look at my pretty face all you want - we're gonna have so-o-o much fun~
U.V. or just Violet (Usopp + Vivi) - the big dreamer one. She is really sweet and emotionally open - probably one of most child-like fusions, but often gets timid and unsure when it's time for her to to stand up for herself. She loves fantasizing and excitedly ranting about all these ideas on how to make world a better place, but goes into very absurd territory without noticing. They fight with a sling and explosives.
No, wait, but listen. But what if The World Government, like, printed money so that everyone can have some, and- No, wait, i don't think this is how economy works. Okay, what if we all just...
Roro (Zoro + Robin) - arguably the most unhinged fusion of them all. With Robin's morbidly creative mind and Zoro's general disinhibition in most generally dangerous situations, Roro is pretty much unstoppable once he set his mind to do something reckless, dangerous and possibly really violent (as they both don't have any qualms about murdering or causing severe bodily harm). However when not in "focused on following through with an insane idea" mode, Roro is actually a rather pleasant company! They're calm, collected and thoughtful, yet shamelessly silly, especially with Luffy and Chopper who they adore. Most of the crew is rather cautious about them (except for Luffy who whines how he misses playing "multiarmed tags" with Roro) because they can cause much trouble without supervision. On the other hand, they're very strong. They fight combining swordfighting with generating extra limbs (which also means an arm slashing you with a sword can sneak on you from any direction).
Oh. I see. How about we send his head- okay, his fingers in a box to his captain as a warning?
Note: Luffy has the privilege of naming all fusions and usually just smashes names together until it sounds like an easy to remember name... Sometimes inner logic of how the name was made is lost even to him
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jasminumdew · 3 months ago
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Chained
Yandere!Rafayel x Fem!Reader
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Tags: obsessive Rafayel, kidnapped, Rafayel being very delusional, I think that's all
Wc: 690
He’s been noticing every move of you very closely recently. It’s like an alarm goes off inside his head whenever you check your phone and stifle your giggle while walking with him down the alley, or when you stop dead on your track seeing a crow, or staying at the hospital way too late for a normal patient. All of these odd behaviors must have their sources, so he looked through your social media, following you around at a mindful distance, blending in the crowd, just to find out what you’re up to. 
You can’t blame him for acting like a creep, in his point of view, it’s just to make sure you’re safe and not do anything stupid, and by “stupid”, it is when you, so innocently and mindlessly chatting and flirting with other boys in the Destiny Cafe without remembering that you belong to him, your one and true love. Oh? You got yourself three boys on your roster? He wouldn’t even consider him being one of them, cause he must be taking up more space in your heart and your mind. At least that’s what he wanted to believe. You’re such a naughty girl, hanging out with other boys, knowing full well you only need him to take care of you. 
But now…Weren’t those dates you shared together not matter to you? The constant texts and calls that once warmed his cold and lifeless heart now seem so meaningless, stupid, and naive. Did he too spoil you so that you think you can get away with anything? You don’t deserve nice gestures, you know that, right? Bad girls like you need punishments. There won’t be any silly dates where you dance together in the pouring rain, play claw machine, or ride tandem bicycle together anymore.
After all 800 years of waiting tirelessly, he never thought there would ever be the time you two get to meet again. But somehow, the stars all aligned, he gets to hold you in his arms again in this life. This has to be the sign that the universe sent directly to him, to keep you to himself forever and never let you leave again. So, he had to take matters into his own hands now that you’re misbehaving and refusing to belong to him alone. 
You will stay down here in his basement from now on, waiting for him every day to feed you, to shower you, to give you some sleeping pills, poor girl, it must be hard to get familiar with this new life. Don’t worry, he’s prepared everything for you already, maybe after he found out about your unusual behavior, or maybe even before that a little bit, or perhaps right after he met you again after 800 years, who knows? But the important thing is, you will be safe there, under his supervision, and never get to leave his side ever again. You can scream and cry and beg for help however you please, there’s no one living in this part of the Whitesand Bay beside him. Oh, you don’t need to worry about others trying to find you. He’s already faked your death with a gas explosion in your house, deleting every evidence of his existence in your life, but guess what? He brought your favorite stuffies for you, isn’t that so considerate? 
A little advice here, you might not even see the brightness of sunlight or the moisture from the morning dew ever again if you keep acting up darling. If you try to be nice for once, get rid of that hatred in your eyes and ask him nicely with that sweet sweet voice of yours, promising that you’ll be a good girl and never try to escape from him anymore, and yes, you will carry his children, then he might change his mind and let you stay in his bedroom, he’s always been a softie, you know it. But you would still be chained to his bedframe, of course, considering how you’ve left him so many times before. He cannot lose you again, his muse, his children’s mother, his beloved bride.
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cenorii · 1 year ago
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In 2021, dirty secrets about the use of bioweapons are revealed inside BSAA + there are direct hints in Umbrella Corps that Wesker is alive. I just combine the two puzzle pieces together in my head. So let's look at another interesting post-2009 scenario.
AU - ELEGY OF FREE RADICALS
Chris was once careless about eliminating Wesker. Knowing his nature, he still didn't check Wesker's presumed place of death properly. Relying on his own luck, Chris left the place of battle and never returned there. But he had to go back. It has become his mistake.
Chris reported the scene of the victory to the BSAA. Rotten BSAA could have used that data in any way they wanted. Like going back there and checking out the volcano. They could have indicated on the documents that they were headed to clear the area of the remnants of Uroboros, but in fact to search for Wesker's remains to get rich off the sale and study of his unique biomaterial. But what they didn't expect was to find him alive. Badly injured, helpless, but somehow alive.
Taking advantage of the weakness of the still living organism, he was taken to the secret laboratory of the headquarters. Now Wesker could be under the supervision of BSAA scientists for a very long time. He's much more useful alive than dead. His knowledge, skills, all of it could be utilized. And it was also possible to conduct endless experiments on his unusual body... Testing the limits of his abilities, testing various poisons, looking at the lethality of their new weapons, and etc. He was once again a puppet, as he had once been in Spencer's hands, from which he had miraculously escaped.
The BSAA kept Wesker's abilities under strict control, he was trivially stripped of any PG67A/W injections, replaced with an alternative that was only necessary for his body to regenerate damage after the battle in the volcano, but didn't provide any additional benefits. So he would remain weak but healthy.
Another remedy was also applied to him, eliminating the consequences of merging with the Uroboros, which modified his body in a volcano. It was discovered in 2011, after the events of Revelations 2. It was rude to call it just a serum, it was something more, because it did not remove the virus itself from the body, but brought it into a more stable form, allowing Wesker to take his ordinary appearance. With him, in this form, it became easier for employees to work.
The BSAA restored Wesker, stripped of his strength, any dignity, as well as his freedom. He was bedridden for several years and various weapons were tested on him, then recorded how his body reacted and at what rate it recovered. An immobilized lab rat, a deserved punishment for someone like him? Perhaps. It was thanks to his "sacrifice" that the anti-regeneration weapon was invented, which had once come in handy for Chris in the battle against Mold.
Just think… how many things could the BSAA have invented using the infinite resources of Wesker's body? He was terrified of these thoughts. Terror at the realization that he had no chance of escape, that he was trapped here forever, that he would continue to have his organs taken out of him and be forced into endless pain. He reflected that he hadn't actually managed to do so many contradictory things to deserve eternal torment. And it's better to let him die than to endure this hell. But his own body played a cruel joke without dying. It was an expert on regeneration. His pride was trampled when he begged for death.
BSAA absolutely did not spend any painkillers and sleeping pills on Wesker, absolutely all experiments were carried out when he was conscious. They had already spent a lot of money on him during his recovery, it was a waste to spend even more on someone who could repair any of his damage.
Pain and terror haunted him for six years. He cursed what he used to idolize in himself.
And then he was forced to work for them. In 6 years he had grown accustomed to the constant pain and had already learned to see himself as nothing, sending his consciousness into free floating. Deep in his thoughts, he created a place where he learned to ignore the endless physical torment. But when he was put on his feet and pulled out of this place… Wesker was even more devastated.
It was unusual for him to suddenly return to normal work, all this created a mess in his head, reality seemed to be nonsense. The usual paperwork after hell? Are you kidding me?!
Morally, he was destroyed. His psyche was severely damaged. Wesker from the "torture room" was locked in a cell that looked like a combination of a room and a laboratory. For fear of being put back on the operating table again, he dutifully began to work and develop various things that BSAA would use in the future. But it wasn't life either. Weakened body, lack of abilities... he wanted to die, but he couldn't afford it, because he was practically immortal. Although, even if he used a weapon that stops regeneration on himself... he still wouldn't kill himself.
«Not here»
«Not like this»
At times he thought he was balancing on the fine line between normalcy and insanity. He saw people at best once every two weeks who came to check on his work and were not at all talkative. Wesker had always been convinced he didn't need company, but 12 years without socializing had made him question his beliefs.
Once a month he was provided with food, and then carelessly, because he didn't need food. His body, experiencing hunger, could devour itself and regenerate immediately.
The only reason he was given a room and released from the operating table was because the organization wanted to see what he could offer them. Of course, they didn't stop studying his unusual body and conducting experiments, but Wesker was already in charge of the process himself. Independently amputated his limbs and so on. Only closer to 2019 were these experiments stopped, because they had extracted all possible benefits from his body.
Wesker remotely, horrified, realized that thanks to his body he would live much longer than the average person, if not forever. Which led him to believe that he would be kept in this cage for centuries. BSAA would close, others would take their place, find him, torture him again. And so on in a circle, for all eternity, as long as human society and greed existed. This had to end... but how? A plan was needed, a complex one that could not be unraveled.
His life and existence was a BSAA mystery from 2009-2021. For 12 long years he was not allowed out of the walls of this cell.
Of course he wanted to escape, he had many unrealistic thoughts in his head about it. He was also interested in meeting Chris, aged, changed. To see his reaction, genuine shock rather than the anger he'd reacted to Wesker's earlier 'resurrections'. Is Chris even still alive today? What year is it now?
But this life couldn't go on forever, the BSAA was cracking at the seams. In 2021 it was revealed that they were using B.O.W. soldiers, something Chris couldn't ignore. So he headed over to European headquarters to deal with it - right where his nemesis was located, a complete headache. Chris couldn't accept that his organization, which was fighting biological weapons, would use them. It didn't fit in his head. He had long ago stopped trusting the BSAA, but this was the last straw.
Arriving there, Chris did not expect to meet someone in the basement laboratories whom he had buried a long time ago.
What was he going to do with him? Shoot him in the head without any thought? That would have been logical and in Redfield's character, but over the years he'd stopped being a complete hothead, learned to think first and then act. Gained a little equanimity.
It will turn out that it was Wesker who was involved in the creation of the B.O.W. in BSAA. Especially since these soldiers are improved clones of Chris himself. Who else could have come up with such an idea? Only to a man who thought Chris was "one of his best men".
For the past 6 years, Wesker has been forced to be an advisor to BSAA, sharing all the knowledge and ideas. He might have been able to pull it all off, if only to get back at that organization, turning Chris' anger on it, and turning his attention to himself at the same time. After all, only this "one of his best men" was the only one who could save him. Yes, Wesker was pathetic. He felt he wasn't even worthy of his former name, being so pathetic as to enlist the help of his enemy. But it was the only option. There was no more talk of pride.
However, it didn't matter now, Chris had come here to punish the founders, so their prisoner, their chief counselor, might prove to be the best informant. And an ally.
Natural intuition made Chris believe his former enemy, the biggest manipulator of them all. As if he was definitely not lying now, because he was in such a big asshole that he couldn't let his words sound unconvincing. Earlier, Chris would have easily recognized his lies, but not now. Right now, completely honest and dull eyes were looking at him from beneath translucent glasses. So damn pitiful that Chris automatically assumed the role of the hero rescuing the damsel in distress.
Chris was quickly combine the information together in his head: the situation, the physique, the setting... His opponent had been held hostage by his own ambition, it couldn't help but bring a smile to Redfield's face. But he hid it in his thoughts, because he deemed it inappropriate once he read Wesker's imprisonment papers. Chris had some free time to devote to the situation.
He read about what had been done to Wesker. About all the torture. And Redfield clutched his head, when he got to the description of his ammunition that he'd used against Mold a couple years ago. He was terrified that this weapon had been created in such a gruesome way... through the suffering of his enemy, who, even considering all his guilt, didn't deserve all this. Chris felt that Wesker should have died and rid the world of himself rather than suffer endlessly. Even for him, he thought it was inhumane.
The first thing Wesker said to Chris was: - Now you've taken on the role of captain of the «alpha» too. This jabbed Chris slightly, but he noticed how the hostage said it without malice. Redfield involuntarily remembered 1998, the mansion, the betrayal, the deaths of the Alpha and Bravo group...
The compartment Wesker was in was to him both an office and a laboratory, and a room. A kind of prison, which he could not leave on his own because of his weak physical condition. He was weakened by the daily injections putting his viruses inside his body to sleep.
Releasing him and examining him at arm's length, Chris made sure that in the state Wesker was in now, he posed no danger, just an ordinary disgust. He resembled only a pale copy of his former self.
The BSAA operative dragged him carelessly behind him like some sack of garbage, concerned only with keeping the information in his head intact. But in his mind Chris still held images of what the BSAA bastards were doing here to Wesker. He didn't want to feel sorry for him, but he couldn't control it, Redfield had never been heartless. Initially he had only cared about information, but it wasn't long before he didn't even notice how protective he had become of him. As if a friend, which in truth, he never was. His captive's behavior was different from what Chris remembered. It was different, like a throwback to the past. Perhaps 12 years of imprisonment had had that effect on him.
He was docile, which wasn't surprising, since Wesker had been treated like an object by the organization, and the operating table had been a good teaching moment. Chris couldn't believe that after so many years of hell his former enemy's mind was still intact, that he hadn't lost his mind and was capable of dialog.
Time passed unnoticed during the proceedings with the BSAA about B.O.W., eventually the organization was destroyed and all its equipment, along with Chris's squad, transferred to TerraSave.
Chris during all of this had to sign Wesker into the Hound Wolf Squad as either a prisoner or an advisor. To keep him from getting shut down again, that was the deal. He helps them, they help him. Over time, he was getting back to normal. The food and good company had done their job.
However, Chris didn't know that his new ally hadn't lost all of his strength, and the ones he had were sleeping under the influence of the medicament. But time passed, the medicament slowly stopped working without new doses, and Wesker understood it perfectly well. And felt it. It didn't affect his appearance, so he could play his role for as long as he wanted. But was it a role? Sure he was portraying a courtesy that annoyed Chris to the point of nausea, but it was partially sincere. Having broken with his past at the fault of the BSAA, Wesker could only hope to find a new purpose. After all, as Spencer had raised him, there is no life without purpose.
Therefore, was it so necessary for him to betray Hound Wolf Squad? Would it be beneficial to him? Chris is a strong point. He has no doubt that if he kills Redfield - another will take his place, and will definitely get him into the basement wheel of samsara. So Wesker had no grand plans yet. After all, any of them would be doomed to failure as long as there was anyone in the world capable of resisting.
But Chris risked to give him a goal, which, however, called impossible - to become the best version of himself. To help the Hound Wolf Squad, to work with TerraSave, to use his knowledge for something other than endless failed experiments. Stop being Spencer's failed experiment. The only option Chris would give him a chance at.
Those words stuck in Wesker's head for a long time. Mentioning the old man was like a low blow. Chris knew where it hurt the most.
It had been several years since Wesker had joined Redfield's team. All that time he'd been hiding his abilities so as not to lose the fragile trust in his person. But the truth couldn't help but surface one day....
On one of the missions connected with B.O.W., the blade of an exploding helicopter blew off Wesker's head, and then another piece of debris cut his body in half.
But he didn't die.
Chris was enraged. With resentment, he felt cheated. What else could he have expected?
First, the black mass connected the body, restoring functionality to it, and then this silent carcass picked up the head. It was slow. It looked helpless and creepy. Chris's squad was on edge, but he ordered to wait. The black substance emerged from the base of the neck and attached the head to itself, then the calm expression on the reanimated head changed to horror. Was he in unbearable pain from the newly received oxygen? Or from the fusion of tendons?
When Wesker recovered, he couldn't at first think of a response to Chris' "explain yourself!"
Everyone's fragile trust collapsed, but not Redfield's, for he knew that if his former adversary had wanted to betray him, he would have betrayed him long ago, he wouldn't have let himself be so ridiculously exposed. Especially after all the torture he'd endured. Chris could understand why Wesker was hiding his powers. Redfield had stepped on the same rake of trust again, convincing himself that he had everything under control.
Wesker, ever since the prototype had merged with Uroboros in his body, had acquired a number of flaws, chief among them an unbearable sensitivity to pain. The only time he could not feel pain was when he was BSAA injected with force restraining drugs. But without them, all the disadvantages came out.
Whereas before he could recover from any wound without feeling anything but minor damage, now the pain was so obvious that every regeneration was accompanied by agony. Especially if it was a burn, for heat is a major weakness for Uroboros. The healing places on his body, after that helicopter situation, hurt like hell.
He was closer to human now than he had been before, and Chris seemed to realize that. That was why he hadn't killed him a second time, but had accepted him back into his squad. It was not only a gesture of goodwill, but also a precaution, a way to keep a dangerous object as close to him as possible so he wouldn't do anything.
How long will they have to cut off the heads of hydra in the face of the creators of bioweapons?
- Why do you trust me, Chris?
- I still believe that anyone can become the best version of themselves. We should prioritize fighting for the future to give someone a quiet life that you and I have been robbed of. I know about Project W. Together we can stop new organizations and prevent many tragedies like this from happening again. And you can help us, Wesker. BSAA took away your choice, but I'm giving it to you now.
Wesker at first couldn't find the words to respond, but after a moment he barely audibly whispered: "Thank you."
From a man who never thanked anyone, Chris was shocked to hear that. And he was proud of him. Had he forgiven him? No, his deeds were unforgivable. But Chris wasn't the kind of man who would turn his back on his one chance to make things right, to make things right on Earth, to save someone's life. In this truce, he sees a future that's bright for everyone.
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facioleeknow · 10 months ago
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Valentine's wish ° Bang Chan+Kim Seungmin
Your boyfriends decided to fulfill one of your whishes for valentine's day ;)
Wc: 847 Genre: smut 18+ ONLY
Tw: threesome, voyeurism, masturbation, anal sex, gay sex, mxm, domish reader, down bad seungmin and chan, prostate stimulation, collars, leashes, seungmin and chan are referred to as puppies, top chan, bottom seungmin
Final part of my Valentine's day collab! Thank you @quokkawritesarchive for this awesome collab <3
Having two boyfriends had its perks. It meant double the cuddles, double the love, double the gifts. It also was very interesting in the bedroom; in that case it meant double the toys to play with. And with two obedient little puppies like yours, the fun was way more than doubled. 
If you had told anybody that Seungmin was obedient they would have laughed at you but it was the truth. If you asked, Seungmin would have jumped off a bridge for you. He couldn't even talk back, that was the power you had. It also meant that Chan had double the sass to handle and you could just sit back and enjoy the bickering. But the moment you said something Seungmin immediately stopped, and you took advantage of that way more than you should've. So when they asked you what you wanted for valentine's day, the choice was simple.
Seungmin rarely bottomed when you had sex all together, not that he didn't like the idea but the sassy guy in him refused to let him relax and take it. That didn't bother Chan nor you in the slightest, you wanted them to take everything at their own pace and Chan didn't mind getting fucked, it was a win-win. Nevertheless you couldn't help but wonder how Seungmin sounded or looked when he was being pounded. Would he whine loudly or just lightly grunt? Would he scrunch up his face or go completely lax and let the pleasure take him? Those thoughts made you rub your thighs together more times than you'd like to admit.
Naturally, when they asked so nicely what kind of present you wanted, you had to try and lay on the table the idea. Chan wasn't opposed as you expected, he actually felt rather cocky about it, but Seungmin surprised you. His cheeks flushed red immediately, the blush crept down his neck and under the hem of his shirt. His teeth were clamped down on his bottom lip.
“Are you attracted to the idea, Minnie?” your voice dripped with honey and it was making Seungmin weak in the knees. Your soft hand carded through his short chocolate brown hair.
Seungmin’s puppy eyes were fixed on you, like a prey hypnotized by its predator.
“I..” the boy in front of you started, but the words died in his throat when you started lightly scratching his scalp. He gulped.
“I'll try for you, if you really want to.”
“You're such a good puppy.”
By the time Valentine's day came around, you were all ready. Seungmin and Chan had spent a week prepping with your supervision. Every night you would find yourself staring at your boyfriends, your fingers deep into your sopping pussy while Chan made Seungmin cum all over his fingers again and again. 
By now Seungmin was more than ready, begging on his knees and hands on the bed for Chan to fuck him already. The older boy hushed his pleas and gently pushed his lubed up cock inside him. Seungmin's mouth fell open but nothing came out, his fingers couldn't even compare to what his dick felt like. As Chan started gently rocking back and forth, whimpers and whines started spilling out his lips. They were high-pitched and pathetic. Seungmin's cheeks were a bright red, like his bitten lips. 
You pulled one of the leashes in your hands.
“How does it feel, my love?” you asked the boy that was now slumped on the bed, his cheek squished against the sheets.
“Good, it feels so good.”
“Do you want to feel even better?” 
Seungmin perked up at that like a real puppy and you giggled.
“Yes please.”
“Channie?” The boy was already looking at you but for good measure you gave his leash a slight tug. His hips faltered and he moaned slightly.
“Play with my puppy's dick, won't you?” 
Another tug.
Chan didn't waste any time and bent down, changing the angle of his thrusts. Seungmin gasped and grasped the sheets beneath him tightly in his fists, only to release when his boyfriend's hand came in contact with his dick. The room was filled with half screams and high pitched moans.
“I'm not going to last,” whined Seungmin.
“It's okay baby, I want you to cum,” tug, “Channie faster.”
Chris nodded and started slamming his hips into Seungmin's. His warm and calloused hand felt heavenly against Seungmin's dick. The tip of his cock was hitting his prostate with every thrust. He swore he could see stars around and hear angels sing for him.
His orgasm hit him hard, harder than ever before. His seed spilled on the white sheets under him, making a mess.
He fell down on the mattress, his eyes closed.
A gentle hand carded through his hair, your hand.
“Did you like it baby?” 
“Yes, a lot,” he opened his eyes to look at you.
Your hand wrapped around one of the leashes, effectively pulling Chan on top of you.
“You've been such a good puppy, you deserve a reward. Would you like to watch Channie fuck me?”
“Yes, please.
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cattonicdragon · 2 years ago
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How about Astrid ruffnut hiccup and heather x a smartass reader who rides a timerjack, because I know the pain of not being able to scratch my back.
Astrid,ruffnut,hiccup and heather x smartass reader who rides a timberjack
*demon noises*👹
My first httyd request!,I love timberjacks they're so cool,I love most the dragons tho so.
Not being able to scratch your back must be a pain in the ass :/
Has been proofread
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Astrid
I dont think It would be a surprise that you and her would get along
Your both badasses and smart
However sometimes you do lose her,if you go into particular detail she doesn't always understand
Stormfly and your timberjack get along extremely well,they're both beautiful and magnificent dragons
It's nice to sometimes just go on a night flight together with no one annoying you
She likes to listen to your ideas and rambles,even if she cant understand everything she still listens
On winter nights you both take a walk sometimes and sit under a tree whilst your timberjack sheilds you from the cold
If your ever running low on wood you,her stormfly and your timberjack go to a forest and have a day of chopping wood and having fun.
She likes to watch when you and hiccup or fishlegs play masons and talons agaisnt eachother,obviously cheering you on
If your timberjack ever needs their back scratched pleas do it
During missions Astrid and stormfly will stay close to you and try deflect any arrows that get to close to you since your timberjacks wings are so big
Having date nights when it's raining underneath a timberjacks wing>>
She likes to chip in on your dragon ramblings
If you do any illustrations or make anything she'll ask if she can see it,she likes seeing your work :)
Loves to spar with you
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Ruffnut
She loves you so much
Your relationship dynamic is literally,stupid chaotic and smart(chaotic/good/etc)
She likes to give your timberjack back scratches
She loves to listen to your rambles,she wont understand anything but she'll sit there like this (////ó//w//ò////)
Shes head over heels for you
She puts her full trust in the words you say,you could just be saying the stupidest shit ever and she'll completely agree with you
She likes the fact that you have a destructive dragon
She will test how sharp your timberjacks talons are so you might want to supervise her around your timberjack
Will kick tuffnut off belch so you can ride on him
She will have input on many things and openly tells you
Tuffnut is nice to you(mainly so ruffnut dosnt do anything to macey)
Will ask if she can ride your timberjack,if you do say yes just make sure she dosnt end up decimating berks trees
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Hiccup
I think it's pretty obvious that you would both get along
Both of you give your own input and ideas/suggestions to eachother
Hes never met someone who rides a timberjack so he will ask if he can study them
If you allow him to he will be very careful and delicate
Toothless and the timberjack get along so well,and they are both so cute,you found your timberjack with its wing on toothless with both of them sleeping once
Hiccup is very supportive of your ideas and constantly asks for your opinion and ideas
During the time when him and viggo where at each others necks he asks you what you think would be the right move,hes especially stressed with the viggo situation so he needs all the help and support he can get.
He and toothless help you and your timberjack improve on dodging and evasive maneuvers
Sometimes if you help with the twins and snotlout hes ever so grateful
He loves how smart you are and if he's ever on a mission with you and one of the twins or snotlout tags along you basically translate what hiccups saying
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Heather
She dosnt always understand what you say but she'll try her best
She trys to learn more and read books so she understands you more
She feels bad for not always understanding you but she makes up for it by being affectionate
She loves to spar with you and try improve not only her own skills but your aswell
Windshear and her cover for you alot,windshears scales are very thick and so she can take hits every so often
She finds your timberjack very fascinating
Your timberjack and windshear get along very well
You and heather once had a friendly competition to see whether windshears spines were sharper or your timberjacks talons
Every so often she likes playing masons and talons with you
Although dagur may at first seem stand off-ish and harsh hes not,hes just protective and worried for heather
You are one of the only people who windshear let's ride her
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the-power-of-a-pen · 1 year ago
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A Way Home
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Fandom: Spiderverse
Summary: Following the loss of his alternate universe daughter, Miguel is reluctant to risk letting anyone close to him and breaking canon again. However, as most anomalies are returned to their universes, there's the issue of you. You don't have a universe to return to. So, after having you on his team for half a year, he adopts you as his child.
Word Count: 4654
Pairing?: Father-child relationship btwn Miguel and gn! reader.
Trigger Warnings: Some cursing, reader is hinted to having a traumatic past (very briefly and vaguely described), 1 reference to reader as "Spiderman" (meant as a gender-neutral phrase)
A/n: This turned out to be longer than I had planned b/c I realized how much I had to add to make the change of heart even slightly natural, so let me know if y'all want a part two of the reader and Miguel interacting further along the adoption. Not sure how I feel about the structure + characterization in this one. Feedback much appreciated! Please!! I'm on my hands and knees, begging for feedback!!!
------
"Lyla, status on current anomalies," Miguel ordered. He leaned over the yellow panels in front of him, watching the same scene of him and his child playing over and over again. His grip on the console tightened.
She blipped into view. "Currently, there are 918,503,201 anomalies to be returned to their home universes. That's 40% less than yesterday! Spider-Byte does have an update for you regarding-"
"I'll convene with her later. I'm busy."
"Busy brooding over your twelfth cup of coffee. Not enough sugar this time around?" Lyla teased, only to be met with a glare. "Alright, someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning. But seriously, it can't wait. A canon event was disrupted and now there's a spider-person without a universe to return to."
Miguel turned around dangerously fast. "What did you just say?"
"Talk to Margo -- she'll fill you in." Lyla blipped away.
------
"There you are," Margo mumbled to herself as Miguel approached. "This one's in rough shape, got dropped in Earth 616 and put up a fierce fight before Jessica took them to HQ. I tried to send them through the Go Home Machine, but it just dropped them back here."
"And you're sure it's not a hardware issue?"
"It's 2099," Margo drolled and rolled her eyes. "There's no hardware issues anymore, grandpa."
"Then try sending them home again. I don't see why this requires my supervision."
"This machine tears people's atoms apart and throws them back together in other dimensions," she explained. "If I run the same person through the machine too many times, they could die."
Miguel sighed heavily and began pacing around. "Well, what am I supposed to do? Keep them here forever?"
Margo looked at him like he was crazy and slowly nodded. "You can't leave them here to die."
"They're an anomaly anywhere they go, Spider-Byte. Maybe death would be a mercy."
"To you," Peter B. called from behind him.
"Maldito sea, carajo" Miguel cursed under his breath, turning around. "I thought you were taking the week off."
"Well, I was going to, but Mayday was begging me for another one of these cafeteria burgers," he said with his mouth full of food. "They're really good, you should seriously try them sometime."
Miguel's eyes darted to Mayday and quickly darted away. "I have work to return to in my office, so if you'll excuse me-"
Peter stepped in his way. "I'm sorry, Miguel, but I can't let you walk away from this problem. It's gone too far."
"I'm sorry, what?" Miguel questioned, laughing bitterly.
"Ok, I'm not great with words, especially not in front of big, strong, angry men, so MJ had me prewrite this, let me just get it- oh, Mayday has it. Mayday, hold the paper up for daddy, thanks, sweetheart."
Peter cleared his throat and began to over-annunciate his speech. "Everyone in this building joined your society because they believed in your ability to lead, shape, and change the world. We trusted you to use humane practices behind your actions and to keep the safety and rights of humanity at mind before all else. However, given the fact- Ok, this is bullshit - sorry, Mayday, don't tell mommy. Point is, Miguel, that you claim that you're all about saving the multiverse and saving humanity, but then you throw half of your sanity away to hunt down a 15 year old kid who just wants to save his dad. You're so obsessed with the concept of saving humanity that you forgot what it's like to care about individual humans. You forgot how to be a human."
"I never forgot what it felt like to care. To love."
"It's okay to admit that the new kid reminds you of your daughter, you know."
For a moment, Miguel and Peter B. just stood across from each other in silence, unable to break eye contact. Miguel's expression was intense, but otherwise unreadable. Then: "Go home, Parker. More and more of you prove that you're untrustworthy when it comes to prioritizing the greater good. I'm not afraid to get rid of you, too."
Peter's arms gripped on tighter to Mayday. He seemed to want to say something, but found it in him to walk away. Once he went through his portal back home, Miguel called for Lyla.
"Hold the chatter, Lyla," he said before she could open her mouth, pinching the bridge of his nose. "Silence any notifications except for the urgent ones. And I mean urgent."
"Well, since you asked so nicely," she remarked sarcastically, but complied.
------
Everything in Miguel's office repeated like a broken record. The video of his daughter. Peter's comment that he "forgot what it's like to care about humans, forgot how to be human." Gwen's "we're supposed to be the good guys." The feeling of his own child glitching out of existence in his palms, the very reason he got into this work. The ticking of the clock. The ticking of that motherfucking clock.
He zipped a web to the clock and smashed it into the ground, falling to a knee amidst the broken glass.
"I understand that you're having a very emo moment right now, Mr. O'Hara," Pavitr began, "But Jessica told me to drop this off." He placed the file on the floor and nudged it over with his foot as far as he could without getting too close. "I'm heading home now, have a great day!"
"Wait."
"Oh, I was afraid you would say that."
"Tell Jessica to report to my office."
"She said to tell you that she's not available until noon tomorrow."
"Of course," he chuckled angrily. "One person's off for the week, another needs 3 weeks of recovery. Now one of my only trustworthy members can't report for duty until tomorrow. But who's checking in on me, huh? That's right - no one. I took on this leadership role because I know firsthand what it feels like to have the only joy in your life, your only reason for living, taken away from you because of your own reckless mistakes. And despite all of that, I made it my life's mission to make sure it doesn't happen to anyone else. But now I'm the villain?! "'We're supposed to be the good guys!'" "'You can't leave them to die!'" "'They remind you of your daughter.'" But does anyone else here know the pain of losing a child you weren't even destined to have?"
Pavitr blinked heavily. "With all due respect, sir, I'm 17."
Miguel barely seemed to hear him. He sank to the floor, running his hands through his hair and not bothering to clear the glass shards around him. "Maybe they're all right. Maybe I'm the one hurting everyone else. Maybe I'll make the same mistake I did before, and take another innocent life because I want to feel fulfilled, just for a moment."
"Should I get someone?"
Miguel sighed. "Just go."
------
“Morning, sunshine,” Jessica called, taking a seat in Miguel’s office. “You had a chance to go through the file?”
Miguel hummed in agreement. “Need a second opinion.”
Jessica flipped through her copy of your file. “Teenager, been Spiderman for 2 years, originally from Earth 45, but got dropped in Ben’s world. A slippery one for sure; took nearly two hours to get them on the ground. Tried talking to them, but they wouldn't speak. I know my stance on this, but what’s yours?”
Miguel paced around the room. “We can’t keep them here. They’re an anomaly regardless of where they go. Margo said that it would be too inhumane to send them through the Go Home Machine again, so… I think we should let them go quietly.”
“Are you serious?”
“When am I not serious?” He took a seat across from Jessica. “I’ve been hearing it from everyone else. I need to hear it from someone who was there from the beginning. Someone who I trust. Am I falling off the edge? Have I gone too far?”
She raised her eyebrows. “You’re just now questioning that? Look, as your friend, I’ll say this: you’re taking too much weight onto your shoulders. You need to stop being Spiderman for a moment and start being Miguel.” She shifted in her seat. “But, as your teammate, I want you to know that I’ll be by your side no matter what you choose.”
Miguel nodded, but he was totally spaced out. All he could think about was his daughter. How he wanted to take this one in so bad, just to feel like a father again, feel like a man again. How he feared the consequences of love. 
Jessica snapped in front of his face. “Earth to Miguel.”
He shook his head. “What?”
“Look, I can’t say that I don’t agree with your initial idea. But I look at them, and at Gwen, and at my future kid, and-” She put her hand on her stomach “-I just can’t imagine leaving them in the dust like that. I was wrong about Gwen, yes, but these kids are suffering. And I don’t know if we can keep making these hard decisions that put these people right back where they were trying to escape from and still call ourselves heroes.”
Miguel held his face in his hands. “I don’t know what’s up and down anymore, right or wrong. I was all of these kids once: Miles, Gwen, Hobie. I know what it’s like to love your family so much that you throw everything else to the wayside. But that cost me my child, and thousands of other lives. I couldn’t live with myself if I didn’t do anything to stop it. I just want to stop the suffering. I just want it to stop.”
Jessica gave him a moment. “Let’s meet the kid. Give them a trial before we make any decisions we can’t take back.”
“Alright,” he agreed, “But if you’re wrong about this-”
“Then lunch is on me. Come on, mafioso.”
------
“Here they are,” Margo announced. “Just so you know, they’re fully aware of their situation, but not very talkative.”
“Let me talk to them,” Miguel insisted. “I want to hear what they have to say.”
As Miguel and Jessica approached, you refused to meet their eyes. Instead, you drew your hood closer to your face.
Miguel took a knee by you, talking through the red barrier. “Hey, kid. My name is Miguel. Miguel O’Hara. I’m Spiderman.”
You gasped dramatically. “No way! Really? I never would have guessed!”
He took in a breath. “So you do speak. Look, we’re trying to relocate you, but we need to have your account of what happened. Why doesn’t your home exist anymore?”
You shrugged and counted off the events on your fingers. “Dalmatian-looking dude crashed through a window at my internship. He went straight for the collider room, and most of my mentors were at lunch, so I went after him. I tried to shut off the collider at the same time he stepped through it, he pushed me into a hole, that lady behind you caught me after an uncomfortably long chase, and here we are.”
“You worked at Alchemax,” Miguel mumbled, though mostly to himself.
“Yeah,” you replied, leaning back. “What’s that got to do with anything?”
“Did you get bitten by the radioactive spider before or after working there?”
“Did I fucking what?”
“That’s how you got your powers, right?” He asked.
“My powers? Oh, I see what’s happening here,” you laughed. “You’re all off your rockers! Let me guess, this is some alternate dimension Alchemax where everyone’s trying to biologically get the abilities that I developed through technology. Ooh ooh, or, this is an elite spider society trying to save the multiverse from itself!”
“That was really just a guess?” questioned Jessica.
“I read a lot of sci-fi,” you explained.
“Nevermind all of that,” Miguel groaned. “What’s your story, kid? What’s your motive? Because if we don’t have that information, we can’t help get you out of there.”
Your expression became grave for a moment as you considered your options and chuckled bitterly. “My story? My story is that I’m a poor kid from the slums who worked their ass off to get into a good school so that I could do better for my family. My story is that my family never loved me, my friends never cared, and I was forced to choose between what I love to do and what the world needed from me. I didn’t have the power to stop my parents from hurting me or stop people from hurting each other. So, I manufactured that power and took it into my own hands. My story is that the moment I was released from that hellhole of a world, I was locked up in a three foot wide cage and forced to talk about my feelings. I heard what you guys were talking about in that back room. All I ask is that you do it quickly. I don’t like waiting.”
“Miguel, we can take a quick debrief if you need one,” Jessica offered, putting a hand on his shoulder.
Miguel didn’t budge. He looked into your eyes and felt your pain like it was his own. He opened his mouth, then closed it again. Finally: “Let them go, Margo.”
“What?” 
“You heard me,” he asserted. “Let them go.”
Margo released you and offered her hand to help you step down from the pedestal, which you reluctantly accepted. “Didn’t know you were one for sob stories, Mr. O’Hara,” you mocked, though your comment fell through as soon as your legs trembled from lack of use.
“I’m not,” he responded, walking up to you. “But I know an innovator when I see one. You’re hurt, yes, but you have the capacity to do so much good. I’m offering you a place on my team.”
You approached cautiously, your arms crossed. “And if I say no?”
“I’d ask you to reconsider.” He held out his hand for a shake. You accepted, and he smiled. “Welcome to HQ.”
Margo whooped in the background and gave your shoulder a squeeze.
------
“Ok, first mission briefing,” Miguel started, walking backwards.
“On the move?” you asked.
“That’s the only way to do it.” He shot a web to a nearby building and dropped from an HQ terrace. 
You followed suit. “Where exactly are we going?” you shouted over the wind.
“Earth 616. There’s a rogue Vulture stealing tech from Osborn. We’d let it happen, but the man's the only thing between a country of people and an all-out war.”
“Got it.”
“We go in, capture Vulture, and bring him back to HQ. Shouldn’t be too difficult.”
 You stepped through your portal and immediately got whiplash from the pure speed of a nearby aircraft. 
Vulture swooped down from above and tore the tail off of the police helicopter. It crashed into a skyscraper and gained speed as it headed for the street below. 
Miguel spoke to you through the comms. “Trial number one, newbie. I’ll pursue Vulture; you stop that helicopter from hurting civilians.”
“On it.” You dived off of your skyscraper to gain speed and pulled yourself forward with your webs. In one smooth movement, you grabbed the two co-pilots and placed them on the closest rooftop. 
The helicopter was quickly approaching the ground, where children were playing in an enclosed playground. 
“Shit,” you murmured, propelling yourself under the machine to create a landing pad for it at a safe distance from the kids. At the rate you could fire, you wouldn’t be able to stop it on time. 
In the distance, you saw Miguel struggling to keep Vulture away from a construction site, and reached out to him over the comms. “Have him ram into that crane.”
“What?”
“Just trust me.”
Miguel redirected the Vulture, dodging last second when he attacked so that the crane would fall down. 
The crane caught the chopper where it was, and you used it as a crutch to help you redirect the chaos to the empty street. You swung around the crane five times, wrapping an immense amount of webbage around it and attaching along the side of a business building. When the helicopter threatened to fall due to the weight of it, you shot three web bombs at it to keep it in place.
When you reached the ground, you were out of breath and half-heartedly waving to the clapping children and their parents. Miguel placed his hand on your shoulder as you observed the incapacitated Vulture.
“Not bad, kid,” Miguel chuckled. “Not bad.”
------
A good six months had passed, and you had risen in the ranks of the Spider Society. You were still without a place to stay, and had been bouncing from place to place in between missions. The first month, it was Pavitr and his aunt’s place. Then, Hobie’s, then HQ, and finally, Gwen’s. Most of your free time was spent discussing tech with Margo or trailing behind Miguel. 
A building-wide alert had gone off, sending every spider-being into high alert as they searched for the threat.
“What’s the sitch?” you asked Miguel as the two of you bounded down the hall. “A futuristic Rhino that’s suspected to work for The Spot just invaded HQ. He’s trying to destroy our tech and pick us off.”
Just as Miguel had finished his explanation, Rhino crashed through a door four floors below. You both zipped towards him, barely avoiding running into Peter B. as he took a picture of himself, Mayday, and Rhino. Miguel attacked Rhino head-on, performing a spin-kick to the face before webbing his arms together and latching onto his back. Rhino broke his constraints effortlessly, and threw Miguel out of a nearby window. You helped Noir get to his feet and went after Rhino.
By the time you got there, Rhino had Miguel pinned to the cracked concrete. His web shooters were broken, and he was using all of his remaining strength to stop Rhino from snapping his neck. When he saw you approaching, he tried to silently signal for you to go, but you didn’t listen.
“Hey, Alexei!” you shouted. “I never really took you for the dominant type! It doesn’t suit you.”
You swung a piece of concrete at his back and zipped to deliver a punch to the face. Rhino was quick to return the favor, and charged you through a nearby wall. 
Miguel attempted to stand up as backup arrived. He climbed onto Rhino’s back and sunk his teeth into his neck, effectively, though temporarily, paralyzing him. A team of 15 spiderbeings worked to get Rhino back to HQ while you and Jessica helped Miguel to his feet.
“What the hell were you thinking, kid? You could have died,” Miguel snapped.
“You were the one near death,” you argued. “If I didn’t come when I did, you could’ve died. Was I just supposed to let that happen?!”
“Yes!”
“No!” You dropped his arm from around your shoulder and Peter B. went to pick up the slack. “Why is it so hard for you to understand that people care about you? You gave me a chance when no one else would. I lost my world, my home, and my friends. I couldn’t lose you, too.”
“That’s not for you to decide. I can’t trust you like an adult if you refuse to act like one,” he grunted, before wavering in his stance. Jessica helped right him. 
You took a step back and pressed your lips together. “You know, I joined this team because I wanted to save people. I have the ability to save them. And… if you can’t acknowledge that ability, then… maybe you need to reevaluate your interests.” With that, you took off.
Jessica and Peter sat Miguel down to rest. 
“How bad did I fuck up?” Miguel inquired.
“Give them a few minutes to sit on it,” Peter suggested. “Kids are like that. They need time to cool off. Just make sure you talk to them later.”
------
You sat on the slanted glass roof of HQ to listen to music and blow off some steam. Heavy footprints sounded from behind you. You sighed. “If you’re here to argue, can you at least wait until the end of this song?”
“I’m not going to argue with you. I wanted to talk. And… apologize.”
That piqued your interest, but you tried to sound nonchalant as you gestured to the space next to you. “Go ahead, then. Sit.” You turned the music off.
He obliged. “I’m sorry for saying that I couldn’t trust you and that you needed to act like an adult. It wasn’t fair. I do trust you, and there’s no reason for you to act like an adult when you’re still a kid. I’ll be more conscious of my words in the future.”
You nodded. “Thanks.”
You sat in silence for a while, and you began to get up.
“Wait,” he asked. “Please.”
“What did you really come here to say?”
“Just sit, and I’ll tell you.” He waited for you to return to your spot and took a deep breath. “When I was first messing with the multiverse after working at Alchemax, I wasn’t as careful as I am now. I found a world where I was dead, but had a daughter, so I replaced myself and began raising her. I loved her more than anything. But, I was an anomaly, and had disrupted canon events. I felt her glitch right out of my hands. Thousands of innocent people died that day because of me. So, I made a vow to myself: never again. I wouldn’t let this happen to anyone else, and I wouldn’t let anyone get close to me.”
He paused, gulped, and forced himself to make eye contact with you. “Then I met you. And I tried to hate you, I really did. But you’re funny, and you’re smart and passionate, and you have a damn good heart. And everything in me just wants to protect you. I’m so mad at myself for hurting you and-”
You cut him off with a bear hug, to which he slowly responded once he understood what was happening. You shed a few tears into the crook of his neck and mumbled, “I’m sorry, too.”
He laughed, partially in disbelief. “For what?”
“I called you a dick behind your back for the first three months because I thought you had a stick up your ass.” You backed away snickering and wiped your eyes. “But you’re more my family than my parents ever were.”
Now or never, Miguel.
“About that,” he began. “I know you’ve been staying at Gwen’s place - and you’re completely free to stay there if you want - I just thought it might be nice for you to have a permanent place to stay, a school to go to, a familiar face, you know?”
“Not really,” you expressed. “What do you mean?”
“I- it’s better if I just show you.” Miguel took a folder out of his bag and handed it to you. He looked the other way as you processed what he gave you.
“Are these adoption papers?”
“Um… yeah,” he relented, still refusing to look your way. 
“And this isn’t a joke?”
“Of course not. But, it’s also up to you. I don’t want to pressure you into anything you don’t want to do-”
“Yes,” you cut him off and wrapped him in an even tighter hug. “Absolutely yes.”
------
Miguel helped you carry your few boxes of belongings that you had left at Gwen’s into his modern duplex. 
“Jesus, dude,” you commented. “You didn’t tell me you were rich.”
He laughed. “This is what being a scientist earns you.”
“Damn.” You took the space in. The windows in the living room were from floor to ceiling, the couch a cool grey with ornate yellow and green pillows. Everything was open concept, and both the Mexican and Irish flag hung on either side of the TV. Aside from the occasional painting, the apartment was largely monochromatic. 
“The kitchen is under that loft area, which I usually use as office space, but you’re free to use it, too. Bathrooms on first and second floors,” he explained while walking up the stairs. He stopped in front of the third door to the right. “This is your room.”
You gently pushed open the door. Miguel had prepared for your arrival intensely. A twin bed sat in the back left corner of the room, a desk in the back right. There was a wide panel of windows with shades and a nightstand with knick knacks. A mirror, bookshelf, decorative rug, and bean bag filled the empty space. A poster with a Spiderman symbol hung over your desk, and a smile fought its way onto your face. 
“There’s a closet, too,” Miguel said proudly.
You opened the closet to find it fully stocked with casual, formal, and tactical clothing. “You did all of this for me?”
He smiled warmly. “Welcome home.”
------
It was the following year on Father’s Day, and you were waiting for Miguel to come home when you heard keys turning at the door. 
“Hey,” you called from the kitchen island. “I made dinner for us. And we can watch that crappy comedy show that you like.”
He hung up his jacket and gave you a hug. “Thanks, sweetheart. How was it with your friends?”
“Pretty good. But it took an hour to get Miles out of that Famous Footwear. I swear that boy has enough sneakers to cover the Mediterranean. How was work?”
Miguel grabbed a plate and took a seat next to you. “Well, we finally figured out the malfunction in the control room. Hobie had been messing around with it for his own projects. Shocker, right? But other than that it was just a bunch of boring meetings.”
“Oh, I just remembered something.” You rushed upstairs to get a gift bag from your room and returned, out of breath. “I made this for you. It’s not much, but my job doesn’t start until July and I wanted to give you something, so…”
He removed the tissue paper to find a carefully knitted shawl with his suit designs on it. He remained speechless for a moment. 
“What do you think?”
“I love it.”
“Really? Cuz I could get you something else if you’d prefer-”
“I love it,” he repeated, giving you a bear hug. “I’ll wear it all the time when the weather takes a turn.”
“I thought it might be useful for winter patrols,” you admitted. 
“It will be. I know you don’t like getting too sappy, so let’s watch some TV, yeah?”
Halfway through an episode of the comedy show, you got up to use the bathroom. Miguel paused the show and admired your work on his shawl. When you came back, he was still staring at it as if he were examining each individual stitch. 
“I’m back,” you said when he didn’t acknowledge you. 
He hummed in response. “There’s something I’ve been meaning to tell you.”
You furrowed your brows, worried now. “Is something wrong?”
“No, not all, it’s just…” He ran his fingers through his hair. “I wanted to let you know that I would understand if you want to look into seeing if there’s any way to find your real parents. I love you and I want you here, don’t get me wrong, but if this is something you feel strongly about, I wanted to make sure you knew that my feelings wouldn’t be hurt.”
You stared at him for a while before bursting into laughter. 
“What’s so funny?”
You grabbed his hands and looked him in his eyes. “I found my real dad the moment you brought me here. I’m home.”
He squeezed your hands and repeated your words as if convincing himself of the truth. “You’re home.”
------
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phenphoenix · 9 months ago
Note
Something I wrote with a semi-canon mindset. This could happen, it may not. Just for fun, really
[In Charlotte's room at the hotel, an alarm goes off which Charlotte blows up. Razzle blitzes to the kitchen to gets coffee whilst Dazzle gets Charlotte's bathrobe and wraps it around her. She takes her coffee, drinks it and puts the mug back before standing over Vaggie] Charlotte: Rise and shine, Vaggie! [Charlotte gets passed an accordion, with which she plays it loudy and wakes up Vaggie] Vaggie: *groans* Babe, not the accordion again… Charlotte: jumps into bed Hey, blame dad. He inspired my love of music and showmanship. [Razzle play the same note on the accordion as Dazzle hands Charlotte notes] Charlotte: So, on top of the usual shit {mutters} redemption, love and feelings... {normal voice}, he wants a talk about what happened with the… vibrators… I got a thing down in Lust with uncle Ozzie, sorry you can't come. I'll… get some more vibrators… but that should allow us time for dinner. I know this great place just outside of Cannibal Town we can try. Vaggie: *sits up in bed* Charlie… I… are we doing the right thing? Charlotte: sighs Again, Vaggie? Look, I don't give a shit who knows who I date, and neither should you. *cute cuddle moment* Vaggie: Yeah… *looks down at her phone* Charlotte: *teleports to her side* I know some breakfast will cheer you up! I got us burgers! Vaggie: *snickers as they get out of bed* Anyone tell you you're a maniac? Charlotte: Burger time! Burger time! BURGER TIME! [laugh together as they exit the bedroom. Vaggie gives a sad look. Cut to later when Vaggie enters a room and walks to Velvette.] Velvette: Well, did you get it? Vaggie: takes phone out Yeah… [Vaggie reluctantly hands her phone over, Velvete snatches it.] Vaggie: Please, don't-. Velvette: Did I ask your opinion? [Vaggie looks scared then sad] Velvette: *looks through the phone* Hell's princess in my back pocket. I won't just be an overlord, I'll be the queen bitch! [Vaggie looks sad about what she did. Velvette smiles and opens the opens a file, causing the phone to fly across the room in a grand display and project a widescreen image. Much to their shock, Charlotte stares at them] Charlotte: Hi, Velvette! [The two stare in shock] Charlotte: Oh yeah, I know who you are. And I know you put Vaggie up to this. Seems you have no idea who you are FUCKING with! [Vaggie looks scared, Velvette rolls her eyes] Velvette: Calm down, babydoll. It's a recording [Velvette swipes at the image of Charlotte, only for her to be right behind it.] Charlotte: No, it isn't [Velvette stumbles backwards in fear] Vaggie: Charlie, I-. Charlotte: Was told to get blackmail on me by this little bitch? I know. The youngest and dumbest of the overlords who thinks she's tough shit. *hugs Vaggie* Don't worry, I don't blame you. [Vaggie starts tearing up. Charlotte lets go as Vaggie disappears, teleported by the princess. Charlotte walks over to Velvette, who's scrambling to leave] Charlotte: Ah, ah, ah~. You and I have business. The way you treat Vaggie is… shitty. So, you have three options; You can give her to me and I'll never see your dumbass again. You could keep Vaggie's soul… under supervision… [Velvette looks to the side, seeing Razzle or Dazzle with a bat.] Charlotte: Or… I can fucking END YOUR LIFE!! [Velvette looks up in fear] Charlotte: We both know what Vaggie is. So if I can't do it on my own, and I am going to be thorough, I know where she keeps her spear. *leans in* What's it gonna be?
Ohhhhh! I like this! Could def be the base for a more fleshed out storyline that happens later on!!
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manicpixiedreamcurl · 2 years ago
Text
The More You Give ❧ (Part VI)
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Pairing | Eddie Munson x shy!reader
Warnings | 18+ minors and blank blogs don’t interact, bullying, discussions of anxiety, oral (f receiving), virginity loss, protected P in V sex.
Word Count | ~16,400 
A/N | Oh you won't be able to move for all the fluff. Cheeky shout-out to @heydreamchild for this post which made me lose my mind in the tags and think about Eddie's relationship with Wayne's mug collection.
Taglist (please don't ask to be tagged if you won't interact with the fic)
Previous Chapter
❦⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄❦⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄❦⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄❦⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄❦ 
 You screw your eyes shut instead of watching the ping pong ball continue its high arch over the remaining cups on the other side of the table. You hear it hit the floor, the barely suppressed scoff across from you at another missed shot. 
Your cheeks are burning, have been since you started this game. You open an eye to find May smiling at you encouragingly as she lines herself up for her turn. She’s more practised than you. Invited to more of these parties, asked to play more of these games. The ball flies from her hand and lands with a gentle splash in one of the three remaining cups in front of you, her expression now tinged with satisfaction. You can’t blame her, you’d look the same if you were good at any of this. You fish the ball out and sip the lukewarm beer for a second before forcing the rest of it down just to get this turn over with. 
“Sorry,” you murmur, handing the ball to your partner and stepping aside to let him take his turn. Safely at the corner of the table, you glance quickly at the clock on the other side of the room. It reads 11:03pm, and you wonder if you could negotiate heading home by eleven thirty. 
Not likely. 
When you’d walked through the door, shoulders pressed between both your friends, you had yourself convinced that you would have a good time tonight. Tipsy from the white wine your mom let you drink under her supervision, warm with joy from an early evening spent with May and Heather in your room. It’s your favourite part of going out; the hour or two before. When it’s just the three of you, with nobody else to perform for, you fit right back together as you always did. Swapping gossip, exchanging compliments. Painting Heather’s nails a soft pink, her steady hands painting yours in return. You worked on May’s make up, smiled shyly  into the mirror when she set your hair up the way you like it and told you with a pout how jealous she is of its texture. 
You listened to Heather, gentle and happy at seeing her boyfriend, at the flowers he’d brought her. You spoke to May about the film you should rent for your next movie night; a comedy with popcorn or a weepy chick flick with chocolate. You’d watched from your bed, grinning and heartsore while May leaned into Heather’s shoulder, serenading her while she applied her lipstick. Heather rolled her eyes fondly as May crooned into her ear, “I can’t fight this feeling anymore!” 
Later, head truly fuzzy from paint stripper vodka and lemonade, you’d screamed all the words to Power of Love with them. Hands in the air, hips swaying, content in the knowledge that, if everyone in the house has drank as much as you, none of them will care to remember how you danced and sang tonight. It was exactly as you wanted it to always be. With your friends, believing entirely, at least in the moment, that you still put each other first. That you were friends now not just because you used to be. 
Only, Heather’s boyfriend had appeared like a grey cloud in the blue sky of your evening. Before you knew it, she was settled under his arm on a couch at the other side of the room, sipping light beer and talking with the friends he’d brought back from college for the weekend. All boys you can’t stand, and know May can’t stand either. The last time you saw them, when May had told them proudly that you were well on your way to NYU to study Comparative Literature, you’d watched two of them make eye contact, sniggering with each other into their beer. You weren’t proud of yourself for adding that you still might do Chemistry, not that it had helped much. 
Soon after, May was called over by some cheer friends. She’d grasped your hand and pulled you along with her, both a blessing and a curse that she refuses to leave you out. Lacking some of your usual self-consciousness, both from your continual sips at your drink and the fact that Caroline, blessedly, hadn’t shown up, you’d managed a brief, fairly friendly chat with Tracy about whether she was wearing too much blush (she was) followed by how well the basketball team will do this year (hell if you know). 
Then, when Josh, a boy May has had a simmering crush on since you were freshmen, invited her over to play beer pong, you let her pull you with her again. And here you are, paired with this boy in green and white. Ethan flashes his white toothed smile every time you miss a shot on account of your shaking hands. A charming smile that tells you how girls might get into trouble on his account; girls like Caroline, girls like Erin. You wonder if it was that smile that made Erin follow him upstairs that night, that made Caroline fall back into his arms with little complaint, all the blame placed elsewhere. 
“Don’t worry about it,” he says, squeezing the top of your arm before turning his attention to the table. May smiles at you again as Josh chugs beer down in a quick gulp, sending you all the signs of gratitude that make you feel guilty for thinking almost exclusively about the ways you could leave soon.
When it’s your turn again, you take stock of the cups across from you. Two on your side, four on theirs, so with any luck this is your last turn. You watch the ball just brush the opposite rim of one of the cups, before bouncing lamely to the table. “Okay, that one was close.” Ethan says kindly, elbowing you.
“Nah, her head’s in the clouds,” Josh says with a smirk, catching the ball and bouncing it a couple times off the table. “Too busy thinking about…Munson, right? Would not have thought that was your type, but uh, I guess that explains why you wouldn’t let Andy-”
“Leave her alone, Josh,” May cuts in, leaning away from him with a scowl. You feel a rush around your ears, your heart in your throat. You like to forget this fact, but sometimes you’re reminded of it like seeing it written in bright red neon. Just about everybody knows what happened between you and Andy to varying degrees of detail, and they can all use it against you whenever they want. 
“It’s not that serious,” he says, the following laugh more defensive when May rolls her eyes. “You are dating the freak, right?”
Your toes curl. “Don’t call him that.”
“C’mon, man,” Ethan sighs. “You’re killing the mood.”
“It’s dead and buried,” May corrects, face set in that brilliant frown that gets your heart pumping when it’s directed at you. 
Josh glances between the three of you, landing particularly on May and her crossed arms. He looks to Ethan again for support, throws his hands up when he finds none there. “Fine,” he says, smacking his teeth. “‘S boring playing girls anyway.”
He bounces the ball across the table to Ethan, and stalks off with his shoulders sagging. May’s face softens when she comes over to you, your chest warm at her concern. “You okay?”
“Mm. Thank you.”
She pouts, swaying a little. “Why are guys such jerks?”
“Um, I’m right here,” Ethan laughs, chucking the ball back and forth between his hands. There’s that smile again, easy and sharp and clean. You think of Erin, dragged through mud. 
“Thanks,” you mumble, barely glancing at him. 
“No problem. He’s an idiot when he’s drunk.”
If you were braver, you’d say he’s an idiot sober, too. 
“Looks like we need to even the teams up,” May says brightly. 
“Oh, that’s okay,” you answer, the only relief from the situation that this may give you a chance to escape for a brief moment. “I wanna get some water. You guys can keep playing.”
“You sure?” She asks, leaning in so it really is just the two of you, giving you a hit of tuberose and orange blossom, the same perfume she’s worn since your first high school party in ‘83. “I’ll come with you if you want.”
“It’s okay,” you say, squeezing her arm gratefully. “I’ll be right back.”
The air is fresher the second you’re in the hallway, without the clutch of warm bodies forcing you to mutter ‘excuse me’ enough that the words lose all meaning. The damp heat picks up again in the kitchen, smaller groups standing around with cups in their hands, some swaying to the distant music. You glance at the sink, find a couple crowded in front of it, their eyes intent on eachother. Even your slightly fuzzy mind decides against trying to navigate around them in search of water. 
“Hey, Ringwald.” It takes a good couple of seconds for you to register that the greeting might be for you. It requires a tap on the shoulder, Erin’s half there smile directed your way. She holds up a cup. “Want some?” 
You glance into it, find clear liquid that gets your hopes up. “Water?”
She snorts. “I know I’m pretty badass, but six shots of vodka in one cup is a little much. Even for me.” 
You take it gratefully, screaming at your tipsy brain to remember not to drink too much of someone else’s water. A couple gulps and you hand it back to her, surprised at how much you needed it, throat a little scratchy from singing earlier before your joy left with Heather. 
“So, uh, how are you?”
You nod, giving her a close lipped smile. “Yeah, fine. How are you?”
Erin tilts her head, her right eye narrowing. “No, I mean, like really how are you?” She waves her cup around, as if gesturing to the entire house. “Seems like you and May are friends again, I guess.”
“We were always friends,” you assure, heart panging. “She was just,” you search for it, unprepared for this conversation. Where you normally would avoid answering altogether, your cottoned up mind combined with the earnest desperation to defend your friend ends in a rambling answer. “I didn’t tell her the right way, you know? She was hurt, finding out from somebody else about, you know, Eddie and I. But we talked it all out and she’s forgiven me.”
“Forgiven…you?” 
“For not telling her myself.”
Erin taps a finger on her cup, considering you. “That’s what she was angry about?”
Your mouth opens, thoughts tangling. “Um, I mean, among other things,” you rush, giving her a reassuring smile. “But everything’s fine now.” 
“Okay,” she says, that half smile returning. “Glad to hear it, Ringwald.”
“I, um,” you step a little closer, forcing yourself to look right into her eyes. “I did want to say thank you for that actually. I just-” You just worried endlessly about approaching her, how you would even thank her for preventing you from being quizzed about your sex life in front of an entire group. You shrug, and luckily Erin seems to understand.
“Don’t worry about it,” she says. “You shouldn’t have had to explain yourself in the first place. But those girls are pretty vicious when they smell blood.”
You’re struck with a pity for her you know she’d probably hate you feeling. You try to remember what she was like before her entire friend group turned on her, before she was taken in by that sharp smile. She still had the sarcastic wit, you’re sure. But without the undertone of anger that comes along every other sentence; less bite. Erin has always been confident, but now she carries herself like somebody full of righteous indignation and nowhere to put it.
“You can have the rest of this,” she says, handing you the water and looking away like she’s read your whole thought process and wants out of the conversation quick. “Those six shots actually sound kind of appealing now.”
“Okay, well, see you later?”
She gives you a little thumbs up as she passes. You watch her elbow past the couple at the sink to reach the bottles and cups piled beside it. Already feeling more sober than you had when you walked in, you finish the cool water, resisting the temptation to start playing with the material of your skirt. 
“Hey, uh…hey.” You look over at Neil from your Physics class, recognising the sound of somebody trying and failing to remember your name. “Could you talk to Munson for me? Tell him I’m good for the money, it’s just that it’s another week before I get paid.”
You blink. The information takes a second to move from your ears to your brain, longer to process their whole meaning. You feel a flutter in your chest; something like excitement, something like relief. “Eddie’s here?”
“Yeah, and he’s making a really big deal out of twenty dollars, you know?”
You look over his shoulder as if Eddie might be standing out in the hallway, finding only the empty doorway. “Where is he?”
“Uh, he was by the stereo I think? So, you’ll talk to him?” 
“Um, sure,” you mumble, pressing past him to walk down the hall back into the living room. There’s May, laughing as Ethan tips his head back to drink, the table laden with a new set of cups. On the other side of the room, Heather, nodding at something and looking serious as ever. 
And then you catch him; a head of messy curls, denim on leather, the cut out t-shirt you know Eddie sewed on himself by hand. He’s standing right next to the stereo, sorting through records. His curls shift with a shake of his head and you just know his expression is dismayed, truly disappointed in the collection. To his side, a group of boys is searching their pockets, failing to hide their efforts to pool money together. 
Eddie’s presence pulls at you, an invisible but physical tug, and before you know it you’re crossing the room towards him. He jumps a little when you rest your palm on his back, his hand flying to his wallet chain. Then his brown eyes land on you, and you feel the unique joy of watching Eddie realising it’s you. His expression turns in an instant from guarded to happiness. Round eyes look you up and down once in surprise to confirm it’s you, once again in appreciation. He leans right into you, smile a little wolfish. “Well, hey. What brings you to my darkened corner, sweet thing?”
What can you say to that? That in the six, seven hours since you’ve seen him, you’ve felt the lack of his presence? That you’ve spent the last hour in particular wishing you’d never come here, wondering why you didn’t go home with him instead? 
“Was surprised to see you.”
“Yeah, well,” he starts, gesturing with his head to the boys behind him. “My services were required, you see.” His eyes track down again, zeroing in at the place on your legs where your dress ends, the fishnet tights wrapped around your thighs. “You look, uh,” he clears his throat, clearly searching for the right word. “Shit. I mean, fuck. You look good.” 
Your cheeks warm. You turn to the side a touch, pressing your knees together. “Thank you.”
“I um, really like these.” His hand teases the hem of your dress, thumb brushing across the string of your tights. Eddie’s fingers are a warm sting that has your breath catching, your body aching to be closer to him, to more of his heat. 
“Munson?” Sounds from behind him, and the spell is broken. Eddie jumps again, hand parting from your skin like he’d touched a hot stove. His hair flies around him as he turns, face becoming impassive again. 
“Gentlemen,” he says, standing in front of you. “Managed to pool your allowances?” 
“Shut up, Munson.”
Eddie’s head tilts. “For future reference, save the shit talk till after you have the product in your hand. Unless you wanna add another ten percent for the ounce-”
“No, it’s fine,” another says, elbowing his friend. “It’s all there.”
Eddie sighs, taking the collection of rumpled bills from his hand. You watch him stand in front of the antsy boys, counting each note twice over just to watch them squirm. “Mm. Looks like it’s all here.” He brings his wallet from his back pocket, attached to his jeans by a chain, and tucks the money inside. Then, after glancing around him quickly, Eddie’s right hand disappears into the front of his pants. 
“Kept it warm for you, boys,” he cackles, pulling out a plastic baggy filled with green clumps and hurling it towards them. 
In the next second, he’s grabbed your hand and is pulling you through the crowd to the sound of, “Munson, you prick!” from behind you. You can hear Eddie’s almost manic giggling over the music, your heart pounding from speeding after him and the fear of the chance at being followed by five boys, all half drunk and furious. 
Eddie’s hand remains tight around yours until the cool air out the front door hits your heated skin, finally slowing to catch his breath, still chuckling to himself. You watch him, wide eyed, as he leans back against the front wall, head falling back and then forward to look at you. His eyes flash, his face tells you he’s proud. 
“Why did you do that?” 
His laughter stops when he spies the serious look on your face, your hands fiddling with your skirt. “Ah, shit. Sorry,” he sighs. “I didn’t plan for you to be around but there wasn’t much I could do, sweet thing. It was already down there, y’know?” 
“That’s not what I- Why would you aggravate them like that, Eddie?” 
Something a little cold comes over his face then. “Satisfaction, pure and simple,” he answers. “The only kind I can get out of guys like that.”
“But, if you didn’t speak to them like that-”
Eddie’s already shaking his head. “If I didn’t speak to them like that- Hell, if I gave them that weed for free, got on my knees and asked for an ounce of kindness, come Monday they’re still gonna throw me, or Jeff, or any of the guys from Hellfire into a locker,” he tells you, voice a plea for you to understand. “Or call me a freak, or lock one of the freshmen, who still barely know their way around the building, in a supply closet for an hour.” Eddie tilts his head at you. “It’s got absolutely nothing to do with me aggravating them or not, okay? It's not about how nice I am, or how I talk to them - it's about this," he stresses grabbing his long hair, then his shirt. "And this. And D&D and the fucking trailer and my piece of shit father. No amount of sweet talk will fix it cause they don't want me to be nice; they want me to change. And I can’t do that, okay? More importantly, I won’t do that.”
Everything he says makes your chest hurt.
It makes sense, that this is how Eddie Munson thinks. Since your first stumbled word, you’ve been hiding yourself away, blending into the crowd to avoid all the pain that comes with being singled out. But him? Eddie has no interest in curling in on himself, shrinking his personality to fit in. Everything he says, every move he makes, is unapologetic. As true to himself as that shirt. 
But it hurts to think that something so unnatural to you could be right. For all your good will, all your work and staying under the radar, it hasn't saved you. Your need to keep quiet only led to Caroline’s harshness, the laughter from the cheer girls. Your desperation to avoid judgement only opened all the right doors for Andy to hurt you the way he did, for everyone around you to know exactly how. All your complacency, all your acquiescence, none of it kept your friends nearly as close as you’d wanted them. 
You swallow, catch Eddie’s eyes, and whisper in earnest. “I don’t want you to change.” 
You could cry at the relief in his face, the fast blinking that vanishes the shine in his eyes. His head tilts. “No?”
You shake your head vehemently, wishing he would hold your hand again so you could play with his fingers. He pushes himself off the wall and leans into your space, hair falling towards you. You look between his eyes and his collar, debating hiding your face there. 
“Not even my driving?”  
“Okay,” you answer, watching his dimples press into his face. “Maybe I’d like you to change one thing.”
“I knew it!” Eddie cries, throwing his hands up. “Sweet girls like you are only ever after one thing. You wanna fix me, huh?”
“No,” you whisper, smiling to the side. “Just, gently improve your interest in speed limits?” 
“Yeah? And what about my proclivity for pineapple and olive pizza?”
You chew the inside of your lip, suppressing giggles. “I think, given time, I can learn to live with it.” You feel a buzz of pride at Eddie’s laugh, the crinkle around his eyes he gets when he’s really, truly happy. “I do mean it, Eddie. I like you exactly as you are. More-” You take a breath. “More than I’ve ever liked anyone.”
Eddie’s hand finds yours again, your fingers curling into his, your knuckles at his palm. 
“Like me enough to come home with me?” 
You want to. Desperately. The relief you felt at seeing him, your whole body telling you that you’d rather spend an evening with Eddie than here, navigating social circles you’ll never really be a part of. 
“I have to tell my friends first,” you say, watching Eddie nod. 
“Sure thing. I can wait.”
“Okay.” Your gaze travels between his eyes and his collar again, stalling your departure. You want a kiss. Want to kiss him all the time, even for a short goodbye. Eddie, sensing your hesitance to leave, narrows his eyes a little like he's trying to work you out. He catches your eyes dart to his lips, and they curve. 
“Sweet girl,” he murmurs, leaning down to you. It’s a perfect, innocent little thing. But you like it, like the domesticity you’re learning with Eddie. You want kisses goodbye and hello, his hand in yours in the car. You want elbows meeting sides while cooking together, waking up in the middle of the night just to hear Eddie breathing before you fall away again, catching sight of each other in the mirror while you brush your teeth in the morning. You want your daily life, with Eddie in it, with all the things he adds just by way of existing. 
You give him another quick peck, face hot, and run into the house before your mouth asks him to leave with you now and never come back. 
You find May in the kitchen, huddled together with a couple of the cheer girls as well as Ethan. She waves brightly when she catches sight of you, gesturing you over. “Hi!” She calls, hair mussed, clearly having continued to drink since you parted. “Where did you go?”
“Um, I was thinking I might go home,” you say, fiddling with your skirt. “M’tired.”
“Oh, are Heather and Patrick leaving too?”
“No, no. I ran into Eddie. He’s gonna give me a ride home.” 
You brace yourself, the back of your neck prickling with tension. You watch the expression on May’s face shift from confusion, not to anger or disappointment, but amusement. 
“Ohh-kay, you’re tired,” she laughs, shaking her head. You make a noise in embarrassment, checking to see if the rest of the group are listening in and she grins at you, pulling you into a quick, floral smelling, hug. “Have a good night, okay? I’ll see you later.”
You give her a squeeze back, chest warm. “Yeah, later.” 
You give a half hearted wave to everyone else, navigating your way to the living room. Heather is where she has been all evening, under Patrick’s arm. “Hey,” you say, avoiding eye contact with the boys around her. “I’m gonna head.”
“Already?” Heather pouts. A quick throb or annoyance rises and falls, your anger that she wouldn't have noticed either way reasoned with the fact that it was your decision not to spend any time with this group. 
“Yeah, I’m tired.”
“I thought I was giving you a ride?” Patrick asks, leaning over.
"No, Eddie's gonna take me home."
There’s a moment of quiet, information sinking in before Patrick's face displays a shocked frown. "Eddie? Munson? You're getting in that scrap heap he calls a van?" 
You look from him to Heather, spy the clear guilt on her face when you say, "He's my boyfriend. Heather didn't tell you?" 
“She most certainly did not- when the fuck-”
“I’m sure she can fill you in,” you say, voice edging towards breaking, thinking about her encouragement, her fingers on the cross around her neck. Heather's mouth opens, her hand coming to that very pendant, and you shake your head. "Bye." 
She calls your name behind you, but doesn't come after you when you leave. 
Eddie is waiting for you still, balancing a seat on the porch rail and smoking when you emerge. A dimple presses into his face when he flicks the cigarette away and slides down. “All good?”
You grab his hand, bury your face into his shoulder to lean on him a little. Breathe in leather and drugstore shampoo - Eddie, Eddie, Eddie - until your heart stops throbbing painfully. 
“All good,” you mumble, turning your head to look at him from his shoulder. “Home?”
You realise how tired you are when you are settled in Eddie’s van, your eyes and limbs heavy. You half want to curl up in the soft seat and drift, but get taken in by watching Eddie as he drives. His fingers following the guitar licks of his music on the steering wheel, his hair shifting when he rocks his head forward. The way he glances at you when he turns, catches you staring and grins to himself every time. 
"You know, I didn’t really have you down as someone who’d be into paaarties,” he says, eyes wide with his mocking tone. He glances at you again, at your worn out state, and half closes an eye. “And I gotta say, you don't seem like you were having a good time."
You think about that for a minute, wondering how best to explain your complicated relationship with social events. “I like dancing with my friends,” you start with a shrug. “And getting ready.” You lean your head back. “It’s like the only time the three of us are together anymore.”
“Yeah?” Eddie asks, glancing over at you. “Why’s that?”
Why is that? You’ve wondered it yourself. It felt like, suddenly, though maybe it happened very slowly without you realising, whatever delicate thread held you together started to strain as you moved in different directions. Or, as they did; leaving you lonely in the place you used to share. Waiting for them to visit, when it suits them. 
They changed. You stayed the same.
Only, you must have changed a little. You replay that last moment with Heather tonight in your head, wondering if you’ve ever shown her your hurt, your anger. Six months ago, you doubt you’d even have left at all. It’s more likely that you would have stayed, wishing to be anywhere else, until they wanted to leave. 
Eddie looks over at you following your long silence, adopts the soft, encouraging smile he gives you to show you he’ll wait for your answer, regardless of the reasons it’s taking you so long to find it. You get an inkling, then, of why you’ve changed, if only a little. 
“We’re all just…different than we were,” you say finally. 
“People change, I guess,” Eddie nods. “For better or worse.”
You think you might be better.
Exhaustion takes over when you cross the comforting threshold into Eddie’s home; the familiar smell and warmth of it sending a message across your body that you can relax now. You clean your teeth with the brush Eddie presented you with the first time you stayed over, scrub at your face with warm water until all that’s left are panda eyes you don’t have the fortitude to deal with. When Eddie takes his turn in the bathroom, you search through the little drawer he’d cleaned out for you to find soft cotton pyjamas that have your eyes drifting the second you have them on. 
When Eddie returns, you’re standing in the middle of the room fiddling with your hands, still a little worried about the assumption of getting into his bed when he’s not there. 
“C’mon, sweet thing,” he says, holding the covers open for you and tucking them over your shoulder when you’re settled on the good pillow, the one he insists you take every time. You watch, heart sore, as Eddie removes every one of his rings, counting the little metallic clanks as he drops them on the table. Then goes his bracelet, his watch and his wallet chain. You stare shamelessly as he pulls his shirt over his head, soft hair following the collar up, up, up, and dropping down again in a curly mass around his pale shoulders as the fabric pulls away. You hear the distinct clink of his belt, curl your knees up at the heat the sound sends through your core. Eddie wiggles his hips a little as he pulls his jeans down, stepping out of them ungracefully, kicking them off his heels. He stands before you in his blue plaid boxers, all pale tattooed skin. 
“You’ve been staring at me all evenin’,” he says, approaching you, dropping down in a squat so his face is right by yours. 
You can’t argue, but find yourself fiddling with the duvet, pulling it up to your cheek and half hiding in it to mumble into the polyester. “I like looking at you.” 
“Yeah? Well, looking’s free. Usually touching would cost you,” he says, reaching out with a finger to pull the cover down from your face and leaning in like he’s sharing a secret. “But, uh, just between you and I, sweet thing, you can touch for free, too.” Your toes curl, glancing quickly at Eddie’s pink mouth, watching his lips tilt. “Need some of my services just now?”
“Yeah,”
He hums, his big hand capturing your cheek to tilt your face to his. Eddie’s kisses are gentle and warm. You taste dried toothpaste on his lips, the lasting smoke in his breath from that final cigarette. Then, when your kisses have turned too sleepy to last, just soft presses to his bottom lip, he climbs into the other side of the bed and reaches out for you, fingers wiggling. You tuck yourself into his side, and fall asleep quick. 
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You drift to waking, gently pulled from sleep by sunshine peeking through cheap blinds and the distant sound of a barking dog. You are comfortably cozy under the sheets. Even having shifted to either side of the bed in the night, no longer tangled, you can feel the heat of Eddie at your back. 
You half snooze for a long time, eyes drifting open to take in the contents of the room. The amps and the Corroded Coffin wall hanging, a closet slightly more full than the first time you were here, a floor still messy but less littered with piles of half clean half dirty laundry. Eddie’s acoustic guitar, his writing overtop in white, THIS MACHINE SLAYS DRAGONS. 
You close your eyes again. The next time they open, the room is brighter. Turning ungracefully, you come face to face with Eddie, and huff a soft laugh through your nose. Eddie’s hair in the morning is a beast, pressed to either side of his face from his tossing against the pillow. Some locks frizzed to the point of dullness, some still set in loose curls; both types tossed over the front of his face. Reaching out, you tuck each lock back until you can see him properly, every pretty feature of his face.
You consider trying to wake him, but find yourself simply shuffling closer, tucking yourself into him, nose at his neck. Eddie hums, one arm coming up instinctively to settle over your half asleep body. 
You finally jump awake to the sound of the front door falling closed in a swinging slam. Eddie blinks opposite you, fully registering the noise and your presence together. He hums, closes his eyes again, takes a deep breath through his nose and opens his mouth wide to yawn so loud he might as well have screamed. 
“Coffee, boy!?” Wayne calls as Eddie stretches and cracks his pale limbs. He glances at you in question. 
You chew the inside of your lip. “Should he know I’m here?”
Eddie takes this in for a second, then smiles. “I mean, he’s about to, either way.”
Regret at not having asked Eddie to set an alarm rids all the warm cosiness of the scene. Your face feels hot already at the thought of facing Wayne on a Saturday morning having clearly slept in this bed. “He’ll- he’ll think we-”
Recognition dawns on Eddie’s face, and he shakes his head quickly. “He won’t think anything, sweetheart,” he tells you, leaning in till he’s put himself in your eyeline. Eddie’s expression is earnest until it shifts into an amused smile. “I’ll even tell him you slept on the floor to preserve my innocence. Score you some points with the old man.”
Eddie’s sleepy laughter has some of the tightness in your chest abating. The sight of his eyes crinkling at the sides, dimples digging into his cheeks, is a treat you don’t usually get so early. 
“What time is it?” You ask, realising it may not be early at all if Wayne’s back. Eddie grabs his watch from the bedside table, blinks away residual blurriness.
“Nine thirty.”
Later than you’ve slept since school started back up, yet even now, the thought of curling back up in Eddie’s arms and snoozing for a little longer is an attractive prospect you’re seriously considering.
“I heard your caterwaul of a yawn, boy! How many coffee’s am I making!?”
Eddie raises an eyebrow. You nod. He calls back. “Three! If you can count that high!”
The sounds of clinking mugs and sizzling oil mix with Eddie’s soft grunts as he gets himself dressed, jumping up and down to pull his jeans over his feet and searching through the closet for a t-shirt adorned with three angels, all smoking. 
He takes you in when he’s put his rings on, no doubt almost as messy haired as him, watching him from his bed. Brown eyes bright, Eddie leans in to give you a soft kiss. 
“Morning, sweet thing,” he says. His hand cups your cheek, letting you press into his wide palm. “Take your time, mm? I’ll assure Wayne my innocence remains intact.”
Your nose scrunches at his teasing, even as you turn to press a quick kiss to the centre of his hand. Eddie rubs a thumb under your eye, then shuffles out his door. Immediately, the noise of clinking plates is smothered by the exchange of familiar jabs and teases between the uncle and nephew. 
The days you’ve spent here have made you realise how special their relationship is. Not something less than father and son, but in fact something more. Wayne looks upon Eddie with the exasperated fondness of a dad, but reserves the true judgement they can be prone to. No passive aggressive comments about Eddie’s track record at school, nor questions about the way he dresses, despite the bookmarked King James bible that sits on the coffee table. He’s ruffled Eddie’s hair kindly every time he’s been here while you were doing homework, hung his latest C- graded test up on the fridge. Eddie told you Wayne bought him that acoustic guitar when he was thirteen, saved up for months to take him to a real music shop in Indianapolis and let him pick one out. 
You can see, even, the parts of Wayne that have filtered straight down to Eddie. Their humour overlaps, the way they can banter back and forth with each other, never crossing the line into hurt. Though, where Eddie can’t help but grin at a good joke, Wayne remains deadpan through every jibe. 
Wayne, when he gets talking, can spin a yarn the same way Eddie can. Stories about his nights at the factory, his old job driving trucks across the country, his youth, told not in a long ramble, but structured perfectly to have you on the edge of your seat. 
You know now that Eddie’s kindness, the way he treats you, was a gift from Wayne. His genuine interest in your life, your plans. His continual, earnest offer of food from his fridge every time he sees you. When your mom made a lasagne for you to take in thanks for all the evenings you’ve spent here, Wayne didn’t send the dish with Eddie to school, but drove to your house with it cleaned to a shine to hand it back and thank her personally. Soon after, Eddie let it slip that the daisies he brought you for your first date were bought at Wayne’s insistence. 
You’d wondered, that day at the lake, how a boy treated like Eddie is treated could be so bright and kind. 
Wayne was the answer. 
So you should be braver, emerging from Eddie’s room in that big hoodie of his he’d been lending you on and off and shorts you’d left here the last time you stayed over, no doubt still sporting panda eyes from last night. But you find yourself making use of the long sleeves, fidgeting with your fingers against the fabric. 
Eddie’s in the midst of getting his wrist thwacked with a spatula for attempting to steal a streak of bacon as Wayne transferred them from pan to plate. Gasping, he holds his hand in the air and lets his wrist fall limp. “I- I can’t feel my fingers!”
Wayne silently watches Eddie flop his hand back and forth, only a slight crinkle at his eyes suggesting he finds anything his nephew is doing at all amusing. When he catches sight of you, his gaze barely flickers from your messy hair to Eddie’s hoodie. “Mornin’,” he says, turning his back to a still howling Eddie to shake the pan. “Eggs? Bacon?”
The temptation to refuse, to be polite and pretend you don’t want anything from him prickles at the back of your mind. Only, experience has taught you he’ll only plate you up something anyway. There for you if you change your mind, something both he and Eddie say frequently.
“Please,” you nod. 
“You gonna set the table, Eddie?”
“How can I?” Eddie cries, wrapping his other hand around the injured arm and holding it up as if the ailment has moved all the way to his elbow. “With this!?”
Wanting to make yourself useful, you venture into the cutlery drawer yourself, giggling as Eddie shakes his limp hand at you, before pulling up the fold out table at the other side of the kitchen. “You’re on coffee duty then, Ed.”
Eddie gives up the routine at the prospect of picking out mugs, his eyes shining. It’s an activity he seems to enjoy deeply; shuffling over to the expansive collection and perusing them like he doesn’t already know exactly who’s getting what.
Eddie likes to give Wayne a novelty Garfield mug, something about the quiet, serious man drinking from the head of the large orange cat tickling him. For himself, a black mug with THE TRUTH IS OUT THERE printed in white letters around a cartoon duck. For a while, he has been trying out different mugs for you, showing the best of Wayne’s extensive collection. But he’s settled on a white NASA mug Wayne picked up on a trip to Houston. “For my smart girl,” he’d said the first time he handed it to you, expression all fondness and pride. 
Eating together is becoming familiar to you now. Wayne has picked up on your tendency to keep quiet the same way Eddie did, sometimes asking you questions but generally letting you decide when you want to speak without much prying. 
“You two got plans?” He asks, glancing briefly at you then turning to Eddie when you look unsure. 
“Uh, nothing solid,” Eddie says, focused on the construction of an increasingly complex breakfast sandwich. “But I was thinking about heading to Greenfield to pick up an album. I had loan of Accept’s newest record from Jeff before he remembered I had it.” His tongue peeks out at his concentration, topping the egg, bacon, hashbrown and tomato with a final piece of toast. “Didn’t think three months was too long to keep it. I mean, what’s an album between friends?”
You watch in near fascination as he manages to keep it all in tact through a large bite. He chews slowly, and swallows. “I’d welcome a road trip buddy if you’d be so inclined, Princess.” 
Your face warms at the name used in front of Wayne, but you nod. 
“There’s a good bookshop, too,” he says, clearly holding himself back from taking another significant bite. “S’where I got my copy of Orpheus.” He must see something, excitement probably, move across your face, because next Eddie is flashing a pleased smile. “Sound good?”
“Sounds good.”
When you’re all finished, dishes washed by you at your gentle insistence, face scrubbed further with luke warm water from the tap and hair finger combed through, you leave a yawning Wayne to his fold out. 
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The shop, located two towns over from Hawkins, smells like the music room at your first school. The memory hits you as soon as you walk through the door; standing in three lines and belting out an off tune Amazing Grace with another thirty kids. Playing with claves and tambourines. Eddie seems in his element here, directing you through display shelves of pop and country records around a corner to the back where his kind of music is kept. “Course, some albums I just use the cassette,” he tells you, rifling through a couple of records. You look around the section yourself, counting up the albums you recognise from Eddie’s desk, his glove compartment. “But when I love an album I kinda have to get it on vinyl, you know?”
You don’t, not really. You have your own pile of albums in your room, all plastic rectangles ready for your cassette player or your walkman. Your dad has a collection of country records, your Mom some Joni Mitchell, the Crosby, Stills and Nash records she played constantly when you were a child. Before Eddie started asking you to pick out albums you thought looked good in his room, you hadn’t touched a vinyl since your aunt asked you to put on the White Christmas over the holidays. 
Eddie senses your confusion, and shrugs. “I mean, I wanna see the album art for real,” he tells you, finding one as an example. “Not quite as effective at four by three inches, right?” You recognise it immediately as Holy Diver. Eddie has a shirt with this cover on it; a demon standing over a priest splashing in water. He was wearing it that day in the woods, when you ran right up and kissed him. He takes the record from you when you nod, placing it back carefully. 
“And there’s albums a stereo just can’t do justice to. They’re useful when I wanna skip songs. But hearing it from start to finish? At the highest quality? It just needs a record. Ah-” He finds the album he came here for and shows you. A blue background, with a chrome, blocky heart shape filled with valves and pumps. "Metal Heart," Eddie explains. "Latest, and best, album by Accept. They're this German heavy metal band? The lead guitarist, Wolf Hoffman?” He sighs wistfully, looking off into the distance. “Man, what I'd do if I got him in a room alone.”
You make an awful snorting sound when you laugh, have to ignore the delight on Eddie’s face lest you burn up entirely. "So,” you start. “Heavy metal is different from regular metal, or is it just another term for it?”
Eddie's face lights up at the question, putting on a refined accent. "Heavy metal, young lady, is a type of metal that encompasses many genres,” he explains, bringing a hand up to add to the role. “For example, one could say all thrash metal is heavy metal, but only a simple fool, would seek to claim that all heavy metal is thrash metal. Do you follow?” His character falls apart at your giggle. “I said metal too many times, huh? Note taken. You wanna listen?" 
At your nod, Eddie walks you back round to the front towards a row of glass booths housing record players and headphones. You watch his hands move carefully, treating the record with the same care he uses to hold your hand. When it's in place, he dons the headphones and places the needle, nodding his head until it reaches the start of the particular song he wants you to hear. His hair fans out a little as he removes them, making to place them over your ears until you flinch and he jerks them back. 
 “A little loud,” 
“Ah, shit, sorry,” he says, turning a knob on the record player. “I forgot. Princess ears.” He replaces the headphones, eyebrows raising in question. The volume more manageable now, you nod happily, listening to pulsing guitars build in intensity, joined by thrashing drums and eventually the telltale screeching voice that immediately transports you into Eddie’s room, the soundtrack of his life. 
Eddie’s eyes are all soft excitement, shining at you, watching for your reactions. 
If you had to make a list of all the things to like about Eddie, his passion would surely sit near the top. The way he fizzes all over to talk about music, and Dungeons and Dragons and Lord of the Rings. The way he’s desperate to share his interests with you. Not out of expectation for you to feel exactly the same about any of it, and certainly not with any assumptions that you should understand it already. Just to share, to let you in, to show himself to you. 
You wish you were more like him, that way. That you weren’t more comfortable hiding, keeping bits of yourself under lock and key lest their exposure leave the most delicate parts of you open to attack. You try to imagine Eddie using anything like that against you. You remember him leaning across the table to you on your first date, listening to you ramble about wyverns and etymology while your feet tapped your anxiety out onto the floor. He’d thanked you for sharing. Very metal, he’d said. 
Three minutes in, and you realise Eddie’s been playing the whole song in his head, because he brings his hands up to follow the chords playing in your ears with an imaginary guitar, hair shaking as he throws his head back and forth. Then he flashes his smile, soft cheeks displaying his dimples and smile lines.
You can’t help it. 
You step forward until your feet are patterned with his. You reach out for his sleeve, playing with the chains keeping the left connected across his wrist. Eddie’s still watching you when you tilt your chin, leaning towards him to press your lips to his. Anxiety prickles along your spine, but you know that nobody can see you. Even better, you know that Eddie is between you and the door, hiding you from the world. With the distinctive chains of his jacket in your fingers, his music sounding through your headphones, his lips on yours; everything around you is Eddie, Eddie, Eddie. 
Safe, safe, safe. 
He pulls away with a huff of breath against your lips, giving you a series of chaste pecks like he isn’t quite ready to stop kissing you entirely despite protesting lungs. Your face burns, but it’s worth it for the way Eddie is staring at you when you finally open your eyes. 
“What was that for?” He mouths, gaze flicking to your lips and back to your eyes.
You bring your foot up, pressing the top of it to the back of your ankle and sliding it up and down your calf. A braver version of you would say what every part of you is screaming. Instead you shrug, still fiddling with his sleeve. Eddie tilts his head, clearly unsatisfied, but doesn't press you. 
"I like this," you tell him as it finishes, removing the headphones. 
"Well, that settles it," he answers, sliding the record from the player back into its sleeve. "You're coming home with me." 
You watch Eddie navigate the shop like it's a second home. He stops off at the cassettes, rifling through for anything new, anything he might not have heard before. He grabs a couple blank tapes too, looks at you to the side with pink cheeks. "In case I wanna make any more mixtapes." 
At the desk, Eddie places everything down carefully while you wait at the empty till. After a good thirty seconds, you start playing with the rings on Eddie's left hand while his other raps against the wooden desk. "Uh, hello? Anybody- ah, shit." 
"Munson," says the bespeckled boy who emerges from the back room. 
Eddie’s fingers twitch, and you cease your fidgeting to look up at him, find his face pulled taught. "Oh, hi. I, uh, didn't think you worked on Saturdays anymore." 
"Switched to the weekend shift," he answers, stony faced. "That gonna be a problem for you? Surely you’re not still in highschool?"
Eddie frowns, hand twitching again as he sighs. "Listen, man, I'm not looking to argue-"
"Don't know why else you'd show your face. You know your money's no good to me." 
Eddie slumps, all the easy happiness pulled from him. He hasn’t looked at you once, and your heart aches. 
"I'm buying these," you declare, searching through your bag for your purse. Tissues, no, lipgloss, no, mixtape, no. 
They both turn to you. The boy behind the desk takes you in finally, his nose wrinkling. "Oh yeah? You a metal fan?" 
"Mm hmm,” you say, voice higher than you’d like. 
"Okay, name three Metallica albums."
You glance at Eddie, find him rolling his eyes until you ask. “But Metallica only has two albums, right?" 
Eddie’s immediate smile is warmth inducing, causes you to shuffle with shy pride. You thrust out the money in your hand, start gathering up the items again to place in your shopping bag while Eddie grins in the face of the scowling man. 
"Whatever,” he says finally. “I don't wanna see you around here again, Munson." 
Eddie gives him a little salute, then grabs the bag from you and takes your hand to leave.
"Jesus," he breathes as soon as the bell announcing the doors closure sounds. "You can't talk like that, sweet thing. We're in public. You’ve-" He scratches at the back of his neck. “You’ve really been listening to me talk about it all the time, huh?”
You frown. “Of course, Eddie. I like it,” you answer, tugging his hand to start the walk back to the van. “Who was that?" 
Eddie’s smile drops. "Uh, Peter? We actually, kinda used to be friends. I introduced him to all his favourite bands back in the day, you know? Then suddenly he’s the gatekeeper of metal- I mean it’s a fucking joke.” He opens the side door, placing your bag behind the front seat. “S'how I met Gareth, really. Poor kid couldn't name two Dio albums so he gets insulted buying the latest one, what the hell is that? We all have to start somewhere. I mean, when I met that guy he was a U2 fan. Anyway-” he continues, closing the door. “I told him he was being a dick and he got all pissy about it." 
You chew your lip. "He acts that way, because you called him a dick?"
Eddie blanches, his head falling back with a quick groan. "Okay, I wanna add a disclaimer that I was sixteen and dumb," he starts. "And he really was being a dick, acting like- like all those guys metalheads are supposed to hate in the first place, and-" 
"And?" 
"And I hit him. Real gentle. With my fist." 
"Eddie,"
"Sweet thing, even you woulda decked him if you'd been there. I swear. And, I just can't fucking stand that shit, you know?" 
You do know. Eddie is all gentle touch and soft smiles around you, but something changes in him when he’s witness to injustice. He'd had to miss a date just last week because he had detention, brought about by standing over a sophomore who'd dared to mess with one of the freshmen in Eddie's club. "You make one vague threat about human sacrifice and suddenly everyone's got an opinion on what constitutes bullying," he'd complained later. "If teachers aren’t gonna teach that kid not to be a cunt, why shouldn't I scare it out of him?" 
You've heard him call the whole group his little sheep, laughing like he doesn't kind of mean it. Like he doesn't think of them as weird kids he'd gathered together in something of a herd, a pack. Like he doesn't think of himself as their shepherd, as their protector. 
"Point is," he says now. "He's the one in the wrong, I swear. Shit. I can't believe he works weekends now." 
"Well, I can go in for you." 
"Yeah? You can set him straight, my baby metalhead. Fuck- didn't even say thank you. Was too busy trying to pretend I wasn't half fucking hard-" You make a soft noise and Eddie blinks, smiling sheepishly. "Sorry. How much was it again?"
You press a toe to the top of your other shoe shyly. "Can't I buy you them?" 
"Huh?"
"Like a gift?" 
Eddie’s face twists. You thought he was just being a gentleman, when he’d paid sneakily on your first date. You know now that’s only part of it. He likes driving you places but won’t accept gas money, likes making you dinner at his home but won’t let you pay for groceries when you tag along on errands. The only thing he doesn’t get twitchy about is your baking, but that’s because you’re there eating them too. You think this might further influence from Wayne; a certain pride, a refusal to accept anything monetary from you. 
"But, sweet thing-"
"Please, Eddie?" 
He watches you, conflicting emotions passing along his expression. "Okay. But you’re picking out a book. A real fancy one. I wanna see leather binding yeah? And one of those little ribbons attached, okay?" 
Your toes curl, nodding happily. "Okay."
You feel more at home as you walk through a glass door to the smell of old paper and ink. 
Joan Baez croons from the record player in the corner. The woman at the register nods as you enter but offers no other greeting. Eddie follows after you when you make a beeline to the poetry section; full of battered, well loved books with cracked spines and fading covers. 
You send Eddie a shy look, spine prickling from being watched in what feels like a solitary activity. You rub your thumb at a dusty shelf, wondering how to tell him, when he leans in a little. "Hey, you’ve been taking all my music recommendations. Anything for me to read?”
“Oh,” you say, mind lighting up before dimming at the thought of being too pushy, or recommending something he might hate. “I don’t know.”
“C’mon,” he says, leaning in more until he's all you can see, tilting his head until you’re looking into his eyes. “What are you thinking?”
You chew the inside of your lip. “Mm. Maybe- Have you ever read The Metamorphosis?” 
Eddie leans back, shoves his hands in the pockets of his jacket. “Can’t say I have.”
“I think,” you consider it again. “I think you’d like it. It’s about, well- A man turns into…an insect.” You simmer over the fact you want to share, let yourself believe that Eddie will be as willing as always to hear it. “It was written in German, and the word for what he turns into literally translates to, like, an animal you can’t sacrifice. Like, vermin?” Eddie’s watching you round off this information in a rush, smiling a little. “Kafka, the writer, didn’t want the actual animal to be specific. But sometimes it’s mistranslated and people say he turns into a beetle, or…or a cockroach,” you trail off, cringing at the sound of yourself. “I’m not selling it very well.”
“That’s where you’re wrong,” he answers. “Sounds suitably weird. Kafka, you said? I’ll get searching.”
Eddie disappears round the corner, leaving you to comfortable contemplation of the poetry selection. Rilke's entire works, some Wilde, some Shelley. You search for something new and land on a name you've never heard. Drawing it from the shelf, you peer at the cover, a silhouette of a bridge bathed in orange, with the Selected Poems by Marina Tsvetaeva printed above. 
You read a couple of the shorter poems, struck by her voice, her imagery. Turning to a random page, see the original Russian on one side, the English translation on the other. The title, asking the question, Where Does Such Tenderness Come From? Your heart pangs in recognition of her feelings as you read, the best part of poetry always finding yourself reflected back at you. 
You and your eyelashes - she writes. Longer than anyone’s, as if she knows about the eyes you wish you had the confidence to stare into without respite.
“Found anything?”
You jump, closing the book quickly as if you’d been reading something illicit. Eddie gives you a quick up and down look, keeping his distance until your shoulders drop their tension. “Yes,” you say, turning the book so he can see the cover. “I’d never even heard of her but I like her already.”
“Enough to kick poor Rainer off the top spot?”
You feel that strange warmth that comes with being known, the little reminder of things that Eddie has learned and remembered about you. “Not quite, but I’ll still give her a chance.” You glance down at the book in Eddie’s hands, glad to see he’s grabbed your recommendation. “You like it?”
“Seems weird as fuck,” he confirms matter of factly. “So it’s almost like I’m contractually obliged to read it, you know?”
He pulls the new book gently from your hands, retrieving his chained wallet from his back pocket. "My turn," he says with an unusual seriousness. “You want any others?”
You shake your head, lean up to give him a soft kiss on the cheek, surrounded and sheltered as you are by shelves and books. “Thank you, Eddie.”
“Nah,” he says, face a soft pink. 
Later, when Eddie has followed you perusing shop windows, and you are full up on drive through fries, eaten in the front of Eddie’s van as you listened to his story of negotiating $20 of payment between his entire band for their nights playing at the Hideout, Eddie drives you back, glancing over at you every so often like he wants to say something, but turning his head back to the road every time instead.
❦⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄❦⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄❦⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄❦⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄❦
You feel relaxed, content, sitting comfy on the couch outside of Eddie’s trailer. He popped his head in earlier and found Wayne still sleeping, so you settled here to read in companionable silence. You, discovering more of Marina’s voice, drifting back again and again to the one poem that makes your chest full. 
Eddie lies with his head resting on your lap, flicking through the short novella. You play with his hair throughout, curling locks around your fingers and stroking his fringe back from his forehead. Occasionally, you glance down at him, taking in his furrowed brow and eyes shining wet at a couple moments. 
“Well, that was fucked up!” Eddie cries, snapping the book shut and somehow managing to whisper a yell. “He just dies? And they don’t care?”
You close your book to focus on him, resting it next to you. You let your fingers tangle into his hair, scratching softly. Eddie, even in his indignation, tilts his head towards the satisfying feeling like a cat. “Mm. That’s the point. He was living his life for his family, but they didn’t really care about him.”
“Yeah, but there’s not caring about someone and there’s hurtling fruit at them,” he reasons. “That Kafka guy had issues, I can’t be the only one who’s noticed.”
You crack a shy smile. “I think he’s brilliant.”
“Yeah, well,” Eddie’s dimples tease you. “You’re a freak.” 
Your stomach flips at the affection in his voice, fingers stilling in his hair for a second before resuming their gentle caress. 
It hits you then, watching Eddie's pretty face, that you’re going to be alone with him again through the night, without interruption, and your throat lumps. As if he realises at the same time, Eddie sits up, hair still at angles from your exploring hands. His mouth opens, then closes again, his eyes flicking from your face to your hands where you’ve started fiddling with the hem of your shirt. 
Forcing yourself to take on his example, you ask, “what are you thinking, Eddie?”
“Big question,” he says. “But uh, I guess, I never thought…I never thought sex was that important, you know? Hell, I lost my virginity in the bathrooms at the Emerson Theatre.” His eyes scrunch closed as soon as he says it, like he regrets letting that particular detail slip right now. When one opens, and finds you smiling at him encouragingly, he sighs with his whole body. “And, I hope you know that it wouldn’t matter to me if you had been with somebody else,” he continues, eyes wide. “Like, at all. But at the same time, I’m happy I’m first, you know? Cause I know I can look after you. I can give you what you deserve. Which, again, technically should be a big fancy bed and linen sheets, but some people have absolutely no patience, so-”
“Eddie,” you groan. But it has no bite. You’re already smiling at him, grabbing at his palm to play with his fingers, heart full. 
He clears his throat. “So yeah, that’s what I’m thinking about. Also seeing you naked, obviously. But that takes up a good 30% of my brain pretty much all the time so it’s not entirely relevant here.”
“You’re so annoying,” you laugh, watching him clutch his chest in mock hurt.
“I just bared my soul to you!” He cries, watching your giggles incredulously. “Do’st thou mock me? Have you no heart, woman?”
You bury the rest of your laughter in his neck, feeling a kind of dizzy happiness that makes it hard to stop. Eddie’s chest shaking under your cheek tells you that he’s as affected, a hand coming up to stroke at your hair as the mirth fades. Turning to look at where your hands have started up playing with his fingers again, you think about what you want to say.
“Eddie,” you whisper, pulling from his neck, looking between his eyes and his forehead as you search for the bravery he has in spades, the ease to tell him that it always had to be him. 
Only, the front door of the trailer opens, revealing a sleepy looking, shirtless, Wayne. 
“Oh, Jesus, have some decorum, man!” Eddie yells, covering your eyes with his hand. 
“Evenin’, Eddie,” he says, followed by your own name. You wave, blinking to Eddie’s palm. “Get everything you wanted?”
“Yup, sweet girl bought me my very own Metal Heart,” he grins, tapping the album where it sits at his side on the couch as you wrestle his arm away. “Sleep well?”
“As good as I can.” He answers earnestly. “Just makin’ coffee then I’ll hit the road. You want anything?”
"I want you to put some clothes on!"
“No, thank you,” you answer over him, shaking your head and leaning into Eddie’s arm. When Wayne's gone, you glance up, find those soft eyes, those long dark eyelashes. Longer than anyone's. 
"What are you thinking?" 
You answer honestly. "That you're gonna look after me." 
"I will," he nods, sounding almost stern. "As long as you want me to." 
You wish it was easy to say, but all you can do is think it. 
Always, always, always.
Wayne leaves with a gruff goodbye, a reminder to Eddie that there's left over pasta in the refrigerator. You remember the first time you were here at the same time as Wayne, the almost desperate rush to get into Eddie's room the second he was gone. 
Now, you and Eddie stay, settled into one another for a long while after, until the sun has moved from high overhead to just behind the trees in front, turning the scene to a silhouette backlit with orange light. Eddie disappears, comes back with bowls of that pasta. You talk about school, and Eddie's band. He explains more about thrash metal, you tell him your new favourite German word you’d learned only yesterday. When the orange fades to blue-black, Eddie looks over at you. 
"Ready?"  
You wonder what it means, that despite the increasing thrum of your heart in your chest, you don't even have to think about it. "Yes."
He holds your hand all the way to his room, guiding you through like you don't know how to find his bed at the end. When the door is closed, sheltering you from the world outside, you wrap your arms tight around him, give yourself the comfort of hiding in his collar, feeling the slow rise and fall from his breath. 
Eddie hums, his hand coming to that space at the back of your neck that eases everything in your body that you’re used to holding tight. “How you feeling, honey?”
“Good,” you mumble. Then, wondering if he can feel the heavy beat of your heart. “Nervous.”
“Okay,” he says, fingers stroking and squeezing at your tender skin. “What are you nervous about? Anything we can fix?”
You let that thought sit. You are still learning how much Eddie means it when he says things like that. Still practising the belief that Eddie wants you to share your worries, carry some of the burden for you. The responsibility of trying to shed the weight, the disappointment of knowing some of it just has to be carried.
You’re resigned to telling him, but finding the exact reason for the nerves twisting your stomach takes its own time. With anyone else, you’d be worried about pain, about what happens if you have to stop. These concerns float away on their own at the feeling of Eddie’s hand stroking at you, his lips pressing kisses at your temple. Then you land on it, and press your face deeper against the softness of his shirt.
“I don’t know, I guess- What should I do?” You ask, voice small. “So it’s good for you, too.”
You feel his sigh from the rise in his chest, the shake of his head from the brush of his hair against your cheek. 
“Will you look at me?” He asks, waiting for you to tilt your head to find him. “You want the truth?” You nod, chin still tight to his shirt. Eddie’s eyes narrow a touch, leaning down conspiratorially. “It will feel good for me,” he starts, his free hand rubbing at your waist. “If we can get your pussy all soft, first.” A surprised throb between your legs has you clenching down on nothing, close to whimpering at the gentle roughness of Eddie’s voice. “All soft, and wet enough that I can just slide in, fill you up easy. Making you cum on my cock, sweet thing. That’s what’ll feel good, for me.” Eddie gives you a wolfish grin as he starts walking you backwards towards his bed, raising his eyebrows in question. “Think we can do that?”
It’s easy, then. “Yes, Eddie.”
“Mm, my good girl,” he says, holding you with the backs of your knees pressed to the side of his mattress, his nose at your temple. “Can I kiss you?”
Even easier. “Yes, Eddie.”
His lips press soft across your cheek and down to your mouth, warm and waiting for him. He's gentle with you, none of the fierceness you've felt in Eddie's kisses more recently. Like he's restraining himself, learning how you like to be touched in the lead up to something new. Your hands find his shoulders, soft cotton of his shirt, and rub at the fabric. His tongue flicks subtly against your bottom lip, but you're already desperate to taste him for real, letting him press deeper without any more prompting. 
You feel it at the sound of his laugh, the sudden curve of his lips, the huff of air from his nose against your cheek. The addictive high of showing Eddie how shameless he makes you, the knowledge that he sees you as you are. Not a wallflower here, or a naïve girl. Not an ingénue, to be taken advantage of, or protected from corruption. 
With Eddie, you can be as you are. Inexperienced and desperate in equal measure, as nervous as you are sure. 
"Fuck," Eddie breathes, pulling away only to blink down at you for a couple seconds before he captures your mouth again, tongue pressing to yours, hot and wet. You whine slowly, rising in volume, your fingers clasping at him. "S'alright," he soothes, giving you another press to your pout. His hand rubs at the back of your neck, encouraging you to lean your head into his support, give him space to leave plush kisses down the side of your throat. 
"Eddie," you whisper, softer than you'd expected. Not a moan, or even a plea for more. Just to say it, to feel the shape of his name in your mouth again. 
"So sweet," Eddie says, voice a wonderful vibration against your sensitive neck. "Sweetest girl I've ever seen- fuck. Can I?" His hands tug at the hem of your sweater and you nod desperately, helping him pull it off over your head. His lips return to your skin the second the material is on the floor, a wet press down to the softness of your chest. You feel his smile, his excited breath. He sucks, pulls at your flesh until it aches and you squirm. “Mm,” he sighs. “Can’t help it. Wanna mark you up-”
Gentle hands peel your bra from your chest, the tenderness vanishing with his tongue finding the pert bud of your nipple, treating the sensitive peak to wet warmth and friction that has your toes curling. The quick scrape of teeth makes you bat at Eddie's shoulder even as your body tilts to follow his mouth when it retreats. 
He gives the other similar treatment, groaning when your fingers drift upwards to tug at his hair. Another little squeak at the graze of his teeth and he’s pulling away to look at you. Your heart jumps at the sight of him, hair mussed from burying himself into your skin, face a light pink, lips wet and kissed dark. The way his eyes flick about you, you’re sure you must be in a similar state. 
Eddie’s throat bobs. “Wanna sit up on the bed, there?”
You nod, letting him help you up to the mattress and stand between your swinging legs.
“Need to go over something else, before we really get started,” he tells you, walking you back to sit on the bed, legs swinging off the side. Eddie drops to his knees to take your ankle in hand and pull at your laces. He sets your sneakers to the side, pings your socks over after them. He presses tickling kisses up your calves, eyes all bright when you laugh and kick at him slightly. 
Once he’s back at your height, his hands move to your waistband, thumbing at the button of your shorts. “You know that any time you wanna stop, you just say, okay? I mean it, sweet thing.” He pops the button, pulls at the zip. When his hands smooth under the denim to your hips, helping pull them down, he continues. “Doesn’t matter when. Even if I’m making this face-” He scrunches his nose up and lets his tongue hang out in a gross approximation of his expression when he cums and you can’t help but cover your eyes at the image. “What, you don’t like it?”
“That’s not what you look like!”
“That’s right, you’re the expert now, huh? This better?” He asks, stretching his lips flat and crossing his eyes. 
“Stoh-op!” You cry, somewhere between giggly and mortified. Eddie’s face settles back into its regular pretty softness, all shining amused eyes and laugh lines. 
“That’s exactly what you say to me if you want me to, mm? Or slow down or anything else you want, okay?”
“Yes, Eddie,” you murmur, reaching up to tuck a piece of hair behind his ear. “Will you,” you swallow, playing with the neckline of his shirt. “Can you keep talking to me? While…”
“You say that like I'm gonna be able to stop talking. Hips up, sweetheart,” he says, helping you lie back so he can pull at your shorts. “Nah,” he breathes, hands disappearing to drag his shirt over his head. “You’ll be sick of my voice by tomorrow.”
Eddie helps you shuffle up the bed, your head falling easy to the good pillow. 
“Never,” you tell him, arms opening to pull him in. He finds your mouth again, kisses a little more desperate, already a touch breathless. Your fingers brush at the back of his hair, soft curls between his shoulder blades. 
Eddie’s hand dances over the soft skin of your stomach, pulling giggles from you when he hits ticklish spots. His fingers edge at the frilled waistband of your panties, waiting for your hips to tilt towards him to dip inside. 
“Oh, honey,” he says with a gentle pout, fingers meeting the hot wet warmth between your legs. “Should’ve told me you were feelin’ desperate.”
Your thighs twitch at the first gentle circle around your clit. Eddie’s thick fingers, the roughness at their ends that catches the sensitive bud so perfectly with each little rub. Already your mind feels light with pleasure, body sinking into the bliss of being touched by Eddie. You’re caught between watching his hand where it disappears, the impression of his knuckles moving under blue cotton, and pulling up the courage to stare back at Eddie as he scans every twitch of your face. He grins at you when you manage to turn to him, licking his lips quickly. The little peek of his tongue, the memory of all the ways it makes you weak for him, has your legs kicking and twitching.  
“Feels good, yeah?” He asks, eyes flickering to your lips as they open to let out a moan. “Want me to open this pussy up, sweet thing? Get you ready for me?”
You like that, enough that you nod desperately without thinking twice. “Yeah, want- please, Eddie?”
“Jesus,” he huffs a laugh, his fingers easing downwards only to drag slick from your pussy back up to your twitchy clit. “So fucking good, baby. Say please again?”
Your hips tilt up, chasing his hand though he makes no move to deprive you of it. Your whole body feels hot; from his words, his voice, as much as his touch. When you chance a look in Eddie’s eyes, all the warm brown has been swallowed up, leaving his gaze dark and intent on you. You curl your fingers into his shoulder, stare at the pick hanging from his necklace, swaying with the subtle movement of his torso following the pace of his arm. “Please, please, Eddie.”
You make a high noise of protest when his fingers pull away from your bud, shivers running up your spine at Eddie’s patronising coo, the jutting of his plush bottom lip. “Like I said, no patience. Isn’t that right, sweet thing?” He sighs, pushes at your thighs to catch a glimpse of the dark, sodden material between your legs. “Just gotta get these off you, give me space to work, hm?” 
Eddie disappears from your side, moving down the bed to sit between your legs. His fingers hook quick into your waistband to pull your panties down your thighs. 
“Fuck,” Eddie breathes, rubbing the wet cotton between his fingers. “Maybe you can be patient. You been wet all day, pretty?” You watch him lean over, hooking your panties over the headboard.
“Eddie,”
He only flashes you a grin, hand strokes at your thigh, fingers digging into the softness to push your leg back. You feel the sticky split of your cunt as it opens up for him, the wave of cool air against your heat. 
“Fuck, look at her,” Eddie breathes, dropping down to his front. His wide eyes blink in near fascination, like it’s anything new to him, watching your cunt flex and shine. “You want two?”
You clench down at the thought. “Yeah.”
Eddie hums, nips at the skin of your leg as he drags his fingers through your slick. The first press inside is a good stretch, lacking the edge of pain that comes with three. They sink inside easily with a wet noise that would have you squirming away if you weren’t so fuzzy in the head, so desperate for the pleasure Eddie’s touch promises. The pads of his fingers find the spot at the end of you that he has mapped out, pussy fluttering around his fingers in protest every time they leave to press back in. 
“Feels good?” Eddie asks, rubbing his face against your leg. You hum. “You want another?” 
“Yeah,” you nod, craving more, wanting everything. “Yes, Eddie.”
“Mm. Open those legs just a little more, baby- yeah, good girl.”
Eddie gives you one final press of his lips to your thigh as he withdraws his fingers, stroking at you again to gather your slick across all three. You feel the blunt ends of his digits at your entrance, the first push and-
“Oh,” you whine, the familiar ache nothing compared to the euphoria of Eddie’s tongue coming to lap at your sensitive clit. Your hands fly down to his hair, clenching around soft curls as if there’s any possibility he might pull away. He groans, sending a pleasant thrum across your nerves. “Eddie, please.”
Your hips twitch when his fingers meet resistance half way deep, but Eddie stops his approach before you have time to register any discomfort. Clenching tight around his half buried fingers, Eddie lathes his tongue, wide and wet, from where his digits disappear inside to the top of your pussy. Your legs kick again, clit throbbing under his attention. He waits patiently for your body to relax into the pleasure, gently pulling his fingers back before pressing even deeper into your supplicating cunt. 
“S’good, Eddie,” you whine, thighs pressing at the sides of his head without your wherewithal. All you know is you can feel him everywhere you need him most. His curls in your hands, tickling the sensitive insides of your legs. His tongue on your clit, gentle sucks that feel like kisses. His fingers filling you, stretching you and rubbing just right at the top wall of your cunt to send tingles along your spine. Ecstasy builds everywhere you can feel him, from a aching twitch between your legs to a wave that passes over your entire body. 
Eddie’s name escapes you on repeat without shame. You hear him curse, feel the breath of it against your clit, as you squeeze tight around his fingers, pulsing with each peak of the high. 
You finally slump into the mattress again, boneless and tingly. You ignore the wet sound produced by Eddie’s hand leaving your pussy, focusing on how he grins at you as he crawls up your body to settle over you, eyes crinkled at the sides with his satisfaction. 
“Jesus, you’re so hot,” he laughs, leaning down to plant a breathless kiss to your lips. “Thought your thighs weren’t ever gonna let me up. Started planning a life down there, you know?” 
You giggle, but can’t think of anything clever to say back, caught up in the perfect view of Eddie above you. Pink and lightly freckled, lips dark, the entire bottom half of his face shining from looking after you until he drags your slick to his tongue with his thumb. His hair falls forward like a curtain around your faces, tickling your cheeks until you reach up to tuck it back. He leans absent mindedly towards your hand then, enjoying the warmth of your palm. 
As you caress Eddie’s face, he gives you a gentle, wide eyed look. “You still wanna?” He asks, a little rushed. “Cause we can stop right here.”
“I want to,” you answer, just above a whisper, but sounding as sure as you ever have done. “If you do.”
“Yeah,” he nods, like he hasn’t quite registered the full meaning. Then, as if he’s taken it in, “yeah. Okay. Okay.”
Eddie climbs off the bed, leaning over his bedside table to search through the drawer, hands emerging with a box labelled TROJAN and a bottle of clear liquid. You watch him fumble a little with the box until it opens, and pull out a square wrapper that has your face feeling hot, as if the presence of condoms is any more illicit that how Eddie has been touching you already. 
“Look away!” Eddie jokes when he finds your eyes on him as he pulls at his belt. “Gotta keep my modesty in tact.”
You jokingly cover your eyes, hearing his laughter along with the clink of his belt, his zip pulling open. The mattress dips with Eddie’s return, and you peek through your fingers at him before settling your hands at your sides. Your mind fizzes at the sight of Eddie naked, settled on his knees between your thighs. Your eyes trace all the ink that decorates his torso, the softness of his stomach. The patches of dark hair on his chest, between his legs. His cock is a dark pink, swollen enough that the tip kisses his stomach. Eddie drags a hand over it with a soft groan like he’s been tortured by the wait. If he registers your staring, he doesn’t point it out, focusing on tearing open the foil wrapper and pulling a clear condom down over his length with a sigh. 
Your fingers pull at wrinkles in the sheets as Eddie squirts some clear gel from the bottle into his palm, dragging his hand over his cock again to spread it. “What- what’s that?”
“Oh, uh, lube?” Eddie says, throwing the bottle down on the mattress with a bounce. “Makes it easier to, like, move I guess.”
“But-” You’d press your knees together if Eddie weren’t settled between them. “I’m wet.”
Eddie’s eyes flash, lips quirking. “You are, huh?”
“Eddie,” 
“Mm. I know, sweet thing. But a little extra never hurt, mm?” 
“Okay,” you murmur. 
“Okay,” he answers. “I think it’ll be easiest like this, probably?” He drags the spare pillow from his side, tapping your hips gently to place it under you, tilting your body up to him. “Yeah?” 
“Yeah, Eddie. S’good.”
“Okay,” he breathes, shuffling forward. With one hand, he strokes gently at your thigh. The other finds your pussy, his thumb playing with clit until you’re feeling pleasured and loose, settled back onto the bed with fluttering eyes. “Still want this, Princess?”
You stare at him, heart sore as you take in his open expression. You can see the evidence of how desperate he must be, how much he wants this. But he looks at you, and you know he meant it when he said you could stop at any time, that he isn’t expecting anything from you, even now.
This body of yours is used to freezing up, follows a routine of tensing and shaking at questions less serious than this. You breathe, swallow, force yourself to look him in the eye. “I want you, Eddie.”
He watches you, searching for your certainty. You smile, a nervous thing, but real, and he nods. “Okay,” he says. “I’m gonna go slow. If it hurts, you say, yeah? Or kick me in the balls - whatever’s easiest.”
You giggle, shaking your head at him, your body feeling loose and relaxed by the time you feel the tip of him catch at your entrance. You make a soft noise at the back of your throat, wanting to watch him but also wanting desperately to keep yourself relaxed and open. You close your eyes, feel the softness of Eddie’s sheets under your fingers.
“Sweet girl,” Eddie murmurs, still circling your clit as the tip of him sinks inside. You feel the aching stretch of him, the pleasant warmth of Eddie’s cock under rubber. He’s saying something, talking to you like he promised, but you’re focused on your breath, on fighting the urge to bear down on him. 
He must be a couple inches deep when he stops and pulls back only to press forward again and you think, for a second, you will be able to lay back and take all the pleasure Eddie always gives you, but-
His thumb circles just perfect at your clit and your pussy flutters, the new tightness resisting the slow press of his cock. It’s a sudden, shocking hurt that has your hips flinching to another stab of pain. Before you can help it your body is tensing all over, a soft pained sound escaping your throat. 
“Fuck,” Eddie says, voice rough, and that the squeeze of your pussy must feel good doesn’t even register. You can only think that he must be as frustrated with your body as you are. Not in control, but a witness to it falling back into routine, pulling taught even as Eddie starts hushing softly. The more you tense, the tighter you feel, the pleasant ache of him pushing inside quickly turning to a stinging stretch that has you clenching fists in the sheets, tears springing to your eyes. 
Eddie pulls out from you, and your chest throbs.  
“I’m sorry,” you cry, wanting to close your legs and hide away from him. 
Eddie’s warmth doesn’t vanish as you fear. In fact it grows as he leans over you, an arm coming to circle your waist. You feel his free hand at your hair, stroking it back from your face. “Look at me, baby,” he murmurs, his breath a gentle caress against your cheek. “You’re in that head, mm? C’mon out.”
The tears that had been bubbling under your eyelids spring free when you open them, tracking down your cheeks as Eddie shakes his head. He wipes each of them away with his thumb until they stop coming. “Sweet thing,” he breathes. “It hurt, and you needed to stop. It’s okay.”
His thumb strokes over your cheek again and you lean into it, resting your palm at the back of his hand as you sigh. Your fingers weave with his, everything better now that you can touch him, now that you can’t run away into your head away from his voice, so close to you.
“Wanna get dressed? We can watch something, mm?”
You shake your head immediately, feeling determined. “Can we try again?”
“We don’t have to-”
“I want to, Eddie.” You assure, hoping he believes you. You rub your cheek into his palm again. “But, can we stay like this?”
There’s a pause as Eddie blinks at you, then his mouth turns up. “Wanna change tactics, huh, Princess?” You nod, watching as he pulls away briefly to help pull the pillow out from under your hips, his hands pressing at your thighs so he can settle properly between them. You whine softly at the feeling of him, still hard and pulsing, between your legs. 
Eddie comes back to you with a kiss, lets you wrap your arms around his shoulders to hold him close, get your fingers pressed to his warm skin, playing with the ends of his hair. 
“Forgot who I was dealing with, didn’t I?” He says, rolling his hips so the tip of his cock drags over your twitchy clit. Your toes curl, the ball of your foot stroking a little at the back of Eddie’s calf as your legs curl round him. “My girl needs to touch me all over, huh?”
Eddie grins down at you, wiggles his hips just to hear you gasp at the friction of your clit, feel the way your digits dig at him, your right hand rubbing at a lock of his hair. Tension pours from your body at the weight of him all over you, the chance to watch Eddie’s joy at touching you, the pleasure he feels in tandem with yours at every roll of his hips.. 
He kisses you again, then both your cheeks and your nose and chin, peppers them in quick succession across your neck to get you giggly and soft. When he emerges, you watch each other. Eddie’s gaze flicks about your face while you count down the checklist of your favourite features; dimples and quirked lips, wrinkles at the sides of his eyes and laugh lines.
“Again?” He asks, one hand moving from your thigh to grasp his cock between you. You nod, press your digits into Eddie’s shoulder as his tip opens you up. 
“Good fucking girl,” he breathes through the first slow thrust, voice clear as day now he’s so close. “You’re so good, baby.”
Pleasant shivers run through you at the praise. When the stretch makes your body pull taught, your fingers press at Eddie’s skin, letting him feel your need to slow. When the sound of his shaking breath, the sight of his eyes fluttering at the tightness of your cunt around him, has you excited and pliant again, your fingers playing at the ends of his hair tell him that he can start moving once more. Eddie pulls back each time before pressing deeper, humming you through each new tender stretch until you feel the wiry hair above his cock tease your clit. Your hips tilt, chasing the delicious rub, and you feel Eddie’s cock twitch inside you.
“Fuck, baby,” he murmurs, face dropping into your neck to groan. “How’s it feel?”
Your cunt flutters at the strain in his voice. This time, rather than sending warnings across your body at an unpleasant sting, your pussy bearing down aggravates a dull throb. Like pushing on a sore tooth, it’s painful and addictive all at once, clenching down again for the satisfying feeling of Eddie’s cock twitching inside you, the sound of him groaning against your skin.  
“Good, Eddie,” you say honestly, fingers stroking through his hair. “Will you- can you move?”
“Yeah- fuck,” he nods into your neck, laughing softly. “Just gimme onnnnne second. Jesus. ‘How do I make it good for you?’ She asks, with heaven between her legs.” 
Your body shakes as both of you giggle together, cut off by another whimpering moan from Eddie. “Aw, shit, don’t laugh or I’m really gonna embarrass myself.”
He tilts his head to the side, looking at you with his chin at your collar. His hips pull back, relieving your pussy of the ache until he slides forward again, letting you feel full, the weight and warmth of him inside you. It’s different than his fingers, which map out the best spots and play with them. Eddie’s cock, thick and heavy, drags along all of them at once. 
His face is so close by yours, watching desperately for every sign of pleasure, any hint of discomfort. You open your mouth to reassure him, but all that escapes is a soft, pleased sound that makes his hips stutter.
“Feels good?” Eddie gasps, nodding like he wants to encourage you to agree.
“Yeah, s’good,”
“Fuck,” he says. “You’re gonna want this all the time now, yeah? Need your pretty cunt full of me?”
Pleasant tingles of shame dart up your spine, and one of Eddie’s hands slips between your bodies to rub at your clit again. 
“Yeah? Say it, sweet thing.” He groans, hips stuttering at a clench of your cunt around him. 
“Like being full of you, Eddie,” you whine, fingers tightening in his hair. “Want it all the time.”
“Jesus- Christ, you’re so good,” he breathes, his fingers bullying your sodden clit. The ache of his cock falls away in comparison to the onslaught of stimulation there, leaving only the satisfying resistance to your cunt clenching down, the sweet fullness, the friction against your sensitive walls. “You’re so good, letting me hear you. Your pretty voice- fuck. Just for me. Think you can cum?”
“Uh huh,”
“Yeah? Like this? Just like this?”
You nod desperately, hips twitching towards him. Chasing the rub of his fingers, the feeling of being stretched full when he presses deep, the throb of his cock inside. 
“You cumming, sweet thing?” He asks, as if he can’t see the flutter of your eyes, feel your body clasp around him. “Yeah? Holy-”
Your high is a gentle thing, compared to what you felt with Eddie’s fingers and tongue. A quick rise and fall focused at the top of your cunt that shifts quickly into the numbness of overstimulation. The lasting ache is too present for anything more, but it feels like a promise, a hint of how good it can be with Eddie, if you do this with him again. 
You feel boneless and tired while he finds his pleasure, staring down at your warm, satisfied face as he groans. You can feel him inside, the twitch of his cock as he groans, the sudden warmth behind rubber. 
His body half collapses on yours, sweat slick skin sticking together. You wrap yourself around him, foot stroking at his calf, hands scratching at the back of his scalp while he tries to catch his breath against your neck. You can feel the pound of his heart where your chests press together, know he must feel yours. When they slow in tandem, beating together, you find Eddie’s wide, soft eyes. 
“That-” his voice cracks, his throat clears. “Was that okay?” When you nod, offering a tired smile, he strokes some of your hair back. “I’m gonna pull out now, okay?” He says, waiting for you to nod again. 
You take a shaky breath as Eddie’s softening cock pulls from you, stealing all the soothing warmth inside and leaving you with a sensitive, fluttering pussy. You whimper softly at the tender feeling. “I know,” he breathes. “I know, sweet girl. Gimme one second.”
Shivers run up your spine when Eddie disappears briefly to deal with the condom, a little prickle of something unpleasant at your neck. You’re only starting to replay everything you just did and said that might be shameful, embarrassing, in your head when he returns. Eddie wipes warm damp cloth between your legs. He smooths away the uncomfortable, cooling stickiness. Predictably, he tosses the cloth over his shoulder to fall back into bed and pull you into his chest. There, with his arms tight around you, his adoring gaze set on you, any shame your mind could convince you to feel falls away. Why would you dwell on it, when you can let yourself feel all the warmth Eddie brings? 
You lie together for a few minutes, tracing Eddie’s tattoos. Over and over, you drag your pointer finger over the lines forming CORRODED COFFIN under his ribs, letters on Eddie’s skin.
“Thank you,” you murmur eventually, watching Eddie’s eyebrows pull together. You kiss his chest. “I’m glad it was you.”
“Yeah?” He asks, voice breaking a little at your immediate nod. “Well, uh, thank you for trusting me, sweetheart.”
You lie together until the sweat on your bodies is cool and sticky. When the first shiver runs up your body, Eddie helps you stand from the bed like he expects you to be walking like a new-born deer. You manage into the bathroom by yourself, emerge washed and clad in cosy pyjamas, his soft hoodie. Eddie takes his turn, and returns to bed with steamed warm pink skin and dripping hair that sprinkles droplets on your face when he shakes it out like a dog.
You drift asleep with Eddie’s breath at your ear, his fingers stroking steady at your waist.
You wake the next morning to that same sunlight through blinds, the same dog barking in the distance. If it weren’t for the new ache between your legs, you might have thought you’d dreamt the entire perfect day, woken up to find it was Saturday again.
You turn yourself over to Eddie’s side, find his long bare back, pale and dusted with freckles. In a second, you’ll curl yourself around him, wrap an arm over his torso so he can wake up feeling something like the way you feel when he holds you. 
But now, your rapid pulse pounds in your ears. Even as he sleeps, your body won't allow you to say it, or even whisper it. Your throat closes up with the thought of too much, too soon. 
But you ache to do something, to let the feeling out somehow. Caught between your throbbing heart and the worries that have kept you quiet your whole life, you shuffle forward, reach out, and draw eight letters, one after the other, on the soft skin of Eddie’s shoulder. 
I L O V E Y O U
❦⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄❦⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄❦⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄❦⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄❦
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