#but i have SO much saved up over the years and i just got a bunch from a little old lady who used to be an artist
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On one hand, I'm relieved to see that it isn't just me suffering in the engagement department whereas I used to get flooded with comments and the like every time I dropped something. It isn't the only reason why I've moved from fanfic work to original work, but it is part of it. The last round of engagement on the latest MM chapter was abysmal, and while I know it's not a reflection of my quality in writing, I kept beating myself up over the possibility that I took too long to update it and people gave up on it/forgot/fell out of love with my work because I as a creator was not performing good enough. It drove me into a bit of a depression for a while.
On the other hand, this is making me rethink my stance on never telling my favorite authors how much they have inspired me to take off with my writing career. This is going to get a little lengthy but I want to talk about it so bear with me here.
Closed circles know how much of an insane, unhinged fan I am of certain writers, yet I have never actually said a word to them. I think I left one comment on maybe two fics that went unanswered (which is fine. They're not active in the fandoms I'm in anymore and I'm just some guy out of probably hundreds all saying the same thing. They're not gonna reply to me) but apart from that, you wouldn't catch me dead actually admitting how much the works mean to me. But why?
I guess I was far too proud and too terrified of being let down if I exposed myself like that. Despite the fact that these authors were literal catalysts for borderline impossible feats I have done within the last year, WELL RECEIVED FEATS at that, I swore I'd never tell anyone how inspiring they were for me. (Unless a casual friendship has been established. I have had the tremendous honor to able to talk to some of my inspirations one on one but under incredibly lucky circumstances)
I had a scenario in my head that these were the cool kids, and if you ever got picked on at all for admiring anything, you know damn well you never tell the cool kids about your admiration. I was afraid that they'd take one look at the work that was inspired by theirs and laugh at it in their enclosed circles. I wasn't going to risk having my confidence crushed and lose the motivation to continue working on my projects by being a fan.
I know not all authors do this. Every time someone comes to me and tells me I've inspired them to be a better writer, I literally frame it in a collection of screenshots I have saved on a hard drive. Every. Single. Time. And I know anyone else would tell me that if the person I admire would actually be cruel enough to mock an up and coming writer, then they're not worth admiring. Which I agree with! But try telling that to sensitive little Kaeli that safeguards their interests with the fiery defensiveness of a feral bear on cocaine.
But then I see posts like this, and I put myself in their shoes. I don't know them. They could be a jackass but they could also be like me - someone who bases a lot of motivation for project completion based off of whether or not people even care to see it completed.
This is all a very long, round about away to say that who cares if the author you build a mini-shrine for in your brain thinks your cringe for liking their work? Odds are they probably need to hear that you liked it so much, it inspired you to do something with that feeling. We all need to hear it. They inspired you and now you're making something that will inspire someone else. To be a creator is to share that passion everywhere you go. There's nothing cringe about it.
A writer friend told me something that broke my heart a little bit today; they're going to quit publishing their fanfic.
My instant thought was that they had been trolled or attacked or that something terrible had happened in their life because this person is so passionate about their writing. It wasn't any of that. Engagement with their works has been going down, as it has for many of us. Comments are like gold dust a lot of the time, and just looking through the historical comment counts on old fics on ao3 demonstrates this trend very clearly. It was not simply the comments dropping off which caused them to decide to stop posting, however.
My friend came across a discord server for their fandom (I should point out here that their fandom interest and mine diverged a couple of years ago, we stay in touch but don't currently read each other's posts because I'm not into their fandom and they would rather gouge their eyes out with a wooden spoon than read anything Star Wars) and specifically to share fic in that fandom. They joined, because we all love a good fic rec, only to discover that their latest multichapter fic, which has almost no comments and very few kudos, is being hotly discussed in this server as one of the best stories ever. Not one of these people has bothered to say this to them on the fic. When they asked, none of participants could see the point in telling the author of the fic they apparently loved so much that they love it.
This discovery has absolutely destroyed my friend's love of sharing fic. They share because they love seeing other people's enjoyment, and fic writers do that through comments and kudos/reblogs/likes because we don't get paid. There is no literary critic writing a blog post/article about how amazing the story is for us to copy and keep/frame. There is no money from royalties. All we have are the words of the people reading our works.
Those people on that server could have taken five minutes of the time they spent gushing about how amazing my friend's story was to other people and used it to tell the one person guaranteed to want to hear that praise how much they loved it. They could have taken a moment to express their opinion to the person who spent hours upon hours plotting, writing, editing, and posting those chapters. Instead, they deprived my friend of thing that keeps them sharing their writing, and in the process have killed their love of it. My friend now feels used and unmotivated.
I won't be sharing a link to their fic, they said I could share their experience but not their identity. I know they plan to post one final chapter. I know they intend to express their hurt at being excluded from the praise for the thing they created, and I know they intend to announce that as a consequence they will not be posting for a long while, if at all.
So please, I beg you, don't hide your love of a story from the writer. It's just about the only thing we have.
#this means I have to actually not be a hypocrite and voice my inspirations openly#DO IT SCARED#and have to remind myself my work isn't cringe people like it for a reason#WE CAN DO IT TOGETHER#LETS SHARE THE LOVE FOLKS LETS BE BETTER
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Oh god please write the timebomb fic!!! (or several lol)
ೀ pairing: ekko/jinx
ೀ wc: 5k
ೀ summary: "Always a dance with you, huh?" Or: two years after the battle versus Noxus, Ekko receives an unexpected visitor.
ೀ author notes: ask and you shall receive!!! I wrote this in one sitting in some weird ass haze and barely edited it, but this is the most fun I had in a long while so I hope you enjoy!!!
ೀ read it on ao3 | listen to the playlist
The first few days after the battle, Ekko doesn’t rest. He barely sleeps or eats, or allows himself time to think.
He can’t.
There’s too much to do. The dead are in their dozens. His Firelights took a major hit, and he knows that for the next few months his fingers will be numb from painting their pictures on the mural day in and out. So many who could have lived but didn’t. So many could have had better futures. But if he just runs, if he keeps pushing on, he can outrun these regrets and his grief, too. This way, he doesn’t remember Vi’s heartbroken expression when she pulled him into a bone-crushing hug after the fight, blood and sweat still clinging to her, her words choked when she told him—
Four seconds.
He could have saved her. He would have hauled her snarky ass out of that tunnel, ripped that bomb from her hands. He would have—
He runs from those thoughts, too. They suffocate him, and Ekko has too much to fix to be suffocated by his grief right now.
He sure as hell didn’t fight for Piltover. He fought for Zaun, for Firelights. Because he knew Ambessa Medarda would never settle for anything other than complete subjugation. She would have destroyed Ekko’s home. She was already busy murdering and imprisoning their people, and nothing but complete eradication would have followed in her wake.
Ekko did it for… her. The blue-haired symbol of defiance, of uprising. A loud declaration that they won’t live under Piltover’s oppression forever, that they’ll reach greater things one day and won’t be silenced. They won’t wait for permission to breathe again. It’s what she would have wanted, he convinces himself, even though part of him knows Jinx would have enjoyed the chaos of the fight more. Or maybe not. Not since that little girl. Not since he had to save her from herself over and over again, only to lose her anyway.
Undercity mourns her. Her visage is everywhere. Jinx the Saviour. She would have hated it, he thinks wryly. She never got to see just how loved she was.
Maybe he should have grabbed her and ran away. Maybe he should have let the world go to hell and saved her instead. The thought, born of fatigue, lingers only for a few fleeting seconds, a rare moment of selfishness amidst a day spent fixing the world around him.
Maybe, maybe, maybe. If only he had tried harder when they were kids and saved her from Silco. If only he didn’t give up on her.
She’s always been his biggest maybe. And now they’ll never be more. Not this version of them. Never him and her as they were.
Aw, are you gonna mope now, boy saviour?
“You’re not here.”
It punches clean through his chest. The realisation of it. The sheer, horrible weight. He’ll never see her again.
Constants and variables, Benzo told him once. Constants and variables, young Ekko.
A week after the battle versus Noxus, Ekko sinks to his knees inside his room, exhausted and heartbroken, and sobs.
.
Things begin to settle. Slowly, at first, the city might have been gutted after the battle but not destroyed, the morale low but hopeful. Hexgates are gone, and Ekko is glad when he finds out. He doesn’t want to see or hear anything about the arcane for a while. No magic in the world could fix the pain festering in his chest.
Sevika, Silco’s old second-in-command and once his sworn enemy, comes to him two weeks after the attack.
“They’re making me a council member,” she says, grunting when she falls into the tiny wooden chair inside his room.
She’s always been a threatening figure, power rippling from every shift of her body, but Ekko isn’t sure he wants to fight anyone right now. Nor does she seem interested in strangling him. She lights a cigarette, her scarred features set in a fearsome scowl.
“And?” he asks for anything better to say. “How is that any of my business?”
Sevika exhales through her nose, reminding him of an angry bull, all smoke and steely resolve. “I’m the only one presenting Zaun or her interests.”
Ekko almost rolls his eyes. Of course she is. The Council is simply falling over themselves to fix the situation. After months of harassment and oppression, false arrestments and beatings, they asked them to bleed for Piltover and its interests with nothing but the bare minimum courtesy extended towards them afterwards.
“I could use you, kid,” Sevika continues, and Ekko forces his anger away, loosening his fists. “Exactly for that reaction. You’re smart as hell, and been a pain in my ass for years. Pilties will try to walk all over us again in a few months’ time. You and I both know it. We gotta beat them in their own game. Not let them silence us again. I could use someone like you. Be my adviser. You’ll have a direct line to the Council. We’ll make an actual change. It’s better than whatever this is.”
Ekko’s expression sours at her words while Sevika’s gaze flicks around his room in contemplation. He works all day to a point of exhaustion, then passes out. It’s the only way he’s been able to continue, day in and day out. Being in a leadership position means you can’t take time off to grieve. Too many people are relying on him. It’s bad enough that he accidentally abandoned his people for months without meaning to. The guilt he still feels over everything has been nearly suffocating.
It’s a good gig, hero! You should do it and be a thorn in her side.
Ekko blinks the flash of blue from his vision, rubbing his brow just as Sevika adds: “It’s what she would have wanted, you know.”
A jolt of electricity runs through him. Everyone, even Vi, has been avoiding mentioning Jinx in front of him.
His jaw clenches. “You don’t know that.”
“Kid, I know what not letting go looks like,” she says, and it almost sounds compassionate, or as close to it as someone like her can get. “We had our differences in the past, I know as much—”
“You killed my people,” Ekko snaps. “Do you know how many lives you destroyed with Shimmer?”
“Sure do,” she replies listlessly, smoke billowing past her lips. “I won’t try to justify my actions to you. But y’know, when you were gone, Jinx united Zaun in a way I haven’t seen since Vander. Beats me how she did it, but people believed in her. Even your Firelights.”
It mirrors everything he’s seen and heard for weeks. Jinx freeing their people, Jinx the Saviour, the beacon for their new future. The one who set and lived by extreme examples, who made Piltover back off and take the Undercity seriously. Because they all finally realised that there can never be peace without a fight. She should be here to fight this battle with him. Ekko should be busy arguing with her that blowing up another building will not make things right. He shouldn’t be walking around with her ghost a step behind him, tormenting him with ideas of what could and should have been.
“And now she’s dead!”
His ears ring, his chest heaves, and he clutches his thudding heart, willing it back in its cage. He didn’t mean to come undone so easily.
“Yeah. Yeah, she is,” Sevika says, and there’s a grimness to her when she says it, an unexpected pain buried somewhere deep in her gruff voice that makes Ekko see her differently. “I get it.”
“No,” he whispers, pained. “You don’t.”
.
Seven months pass before Ekko finally picks up a brush for her.
He sleeps better at night but not without nightmares. Not without remembering Powder from the alternative universe and how they danced. How sweet her kiss felt. Not without that memory smearing to finding Jinx with a grenade in her hand, again, ready to disappear, go somewhere he could never reach her.
Ekko still hears the detonation in his ears, over and over, on a sickening loop. His mind likes to torture him with ideas he failed to save her. That no matter what he does, or how he mends time, she’s forever out of reach. His blue beacon, his lighthouse he can never find in the depthless ocean of reality.
Many have drawn her, but he still thinks that no one knows the exact hue of her hair or the wicked shine in her eyes better than him. He’s spent an entire lifetime examining them, looking for them in a sea of thousands.
Their city is rebuilding. He agreed to Sevika’s request after a few days of contemplation. Caitlyn Kiramman’s expression when he ambled into the Council room was worth the additional burden now on his shoulder. But she’s changed too, matured, and now fills her position as the Council’s leader well.
Ekko won’t forget how she allowed his friends to be imprisoned, tortured, and, in some cases, killed, but her regret made her side with him and Sevika more often than not during voting, and maybe he could at least one day forgive her. Another maybe. For Vi, if nothing else, who clearly loves the blue-haired woman fiercely.
The barren wall stares at him. He’s painted Powder before, but this is different. One day, his friend, his dearest friend, was simply gone. Without a goodbye, in a wake of tragedy. The life Ekko once had disintegrated beneath his feet overnight. Benzo killed. Vander dead. Mylo and Claggor too. Vi died as well. Or so he believed for years. Powder was missing until a different knife was delivered to him weeks later, when the word on the street spread about Silco being seen with a little girl with blue hair.
Ekko sighs, hanging his head. The city is healing, but he isn’t, or at least not as quickly.
He runs his hand over the white wall, picturing Jinx as he saw her last, those precious hours between talking her down from the abyss and their joint attack on Noxian forces. It felt so good to rely on her again, to stand with her, side by side. As natural as breathing.
You’re the order to my chaos, hero.
“Leave me alone,” he says quietly, head hung low. “It’s been months.”
A figment of Jinx chortles, arms crossed over her chest as she leans back against the wall. You would get bored to death without me. Ha! Get it?
Shooting a glare at her, Ekko picks up a brush, his fingers quivering. Tears burn in his eyes when he dips the brush into the paints he painstakingly mixed. He works, and works, until his eyes are dry and his wrist hurts. Ekko doesn’t stop until he loses light and when he steps back, he is looking at Jinx. Equal parts chaos and something ethereal.
He wipes angrily across his mouth when he tastes saltiness pooling there and goes home.
There’s no sleep that night.
.
Time is a strange thing. It weaves and flows. Without his Z-Drive, he has no control over it. Time simply goes on, and he’s the passenger in a vehicle he doesn’t want to move.
He’s important these days. He’s one of the few bright minds still left, and he’s endlessly busy with something. City of Progress needs every mind that can be spared. Wounds heal, and time dulls the memory, but not everything is so easily forgotten. Piltover moves quicker, but the Undercity erects a statue for Jinx beside Vander’s. He sees Vi at the ceremony, and they exchange strained smiles. They speak sometimes, but it’s not as often as it used to be. They’re both dealing with their grief the best they can.
At least Vi has Cait. Ekko has nothing but a cold bed and purpose.
He and Sevika make a good team. It almost makes him wonder what could have been in a universe where they were on the same side from the start. His Zaun, cracked but not broken, is resembling the bright version of the Zaun and Piltover he saw in the alternative verse. There're years of work still left, but there’s something like hope in him, fragile and misplaced as it might be.
A year passes. Then two. He visits the graves; he lights candles for those lost. Some days Ekko sees her, other days he doesn’t. He hopes for a glimpse, even when he knows he shouldn’t. It should be easier to let go of what you never had, right?
His mural for Jinx grows. Other faces join her, people who died believing in her, surrounding the one they placed their trust in. And, at the centre of it all, her, her, her.
Still her.
Always her.
.
He’s not sure what arouses him. He hasn’t slept well in years, perpetual exhaustion clinging to him like a shawl. Some would call it the weight of living, no doubt.
There’s a shift in the air, a disturbance that’s not enough to make Ekko jolt awake and reach for a weapon, but enough to make his eyes flutter open. He breathes the cool air, pushing his grogginess away.
There’s a shape at the foot of his bed. Small and round. It takes several seconds for his vision to adjust, for him to realise that a hooded figure sits perched on his bed, knees pulled to their chest.
Ekko hasn’t had to rely on his battle instincts in two years, but there’s enough left in him to attack without hesitation. His fingers tangle in the cloak, shoving the figure down, his knee pressing harshly into their abdominal, hands seeking the intruder’s throat—
“Wow, little man, you sure know how to roll out the welcoming mat,” the all too familiar voice drawls before his fingers tighten instinctively around the slender, warm throat.
A haggard breath forces from Ekko’s parted mouth. In the wild struggle, the stranger’s hood has slipped down, revealing a familiar face with a startling crop of blue hair. His heart squeezes painfully, forcing him away from Jinx’s apparition.
“Leave me alone,” he croaks, rubbing his eyes till his vision swims. “Just leave me alone! I don’t want to see you anymore!”
“Huh, fine. I thought after two years, the welcome would be a tad warmer. Brrr.”
Ekko pushes himself to his feet, stumbling away, watching warily as the young woman sits back up, picking at her messy hair. She looks different. A little older than Jinx from his visions or memories. Her hair is longer, though nowhere near the same length she once had braided into two twin braids. She swings her leg back and forth, another pulled up to her chest while she watches him. And… her eyes. Ekko was the last person to see her with blue eyes before their battle on the bridge. The last time he saw Jinx alive, they were a dangerous, burning violet.
Now, even with the shade of the night, they’re a muddy mix between the blue he once knew, and the piercing violet that made her so deadly. As if that restless edge in her has calmed down and settled.
Ekko’s chest heaves as he stumbles back a step.
“Soooo—” she begins.
“You’re alive.”
Jinx shrugs her shoulders. “Yup. Clearly. In the flesh even,” she crows, but it’s more muted when compared to the wildness he once faced off against.
His hand flies to his stomach, and Ekko distantly wonders if he’s about to throw up in front of a girl he’s spent his entire life loving.
Mercifully, his stomach settles, but his heart beats so loudly he can hear the blood rushing in his skull.
“You’re alive,” he repeats, harder this time. “It’s been two years.”
“Yeah.”
She doesn’t offer more than that, but there’s a shadow over her narrow face. She’s healthier. There’s more weight on her bones, her skin has lost some of the pallidness. As if someone took Powder and Jinx, split them clean down the middle, and fused them into one body. Stronger, more self-reassured, less teetering on the brink.
“Would have written but mail is crappy where I was,” she jokes, her voice a familiar, drawling litany. “Besides, this is so much more mysterious—”
He closes the distance between them in two steps. His room isn’t big but he would have walked, ran, sprinted if needed to close the distance between them. His arms wrap around her and Ekko squeezes her so tightly he hears a small breath escape Jinx. She’s solid and warm. Smells faintly of sea and something metallic. Ekko buries his face in the soft crook of Jinx’s neck, gasping for breath.
“Woah, hero, you’re gonna break my ribs,” she whispers, but her arms wind around him, more careful, unsure. “I thought you hated me?”
Even when he releases her, Ekko’s hands linger on her, go to her face, examining her through the crack of light illuminating his room.
“I saw you,” he breathes, devastated. “I saw you everywhere. I hoped to see you everywhere.”
Something flickers over her face, an unknown thing, secretive and distant as she’s always felt to him.
“Geez, seeing things? And they call me crazy.”
“You’re not crazy.”
There’s such vehemence in his voice it startles them both. Jinx nibbles on her inner cheek, searching his face cautiously. “I thought you’d be mad.”
Ekko laughs, a low huff of amusement. “Do you think I care for you so little, huh?”
Too late he realises he’s without a shirt, and is, in fact, mostly bare before the girl he’s harboured a crush on for years. Near boyish shyness forces Ekko back, making him clear his throat. His hands tremble when he reaches for a discarded t-shirt, hoping it doesn’t smell bad when he pulls it over his head. When he glances at her over his shoulder, Jinx is still there, still watching him, though there’s a thoughtful air around her.
When she notices him looking, she offers him a sarcastic grin.
“No need to get shy, stud.”
“Shut up,” he grumbles.
He plops down on his unmade bed, watching her watch him. Her face is half hidden by her arms propped on her bent knee, but the silence between them isn’t awkward. They’re taking each other in, taking in the changes that have touched them both in the last two years.
“Why come back now?” he asks, eventually.
Jinx blinks, near feline-like, dropping her head back to stare at his ceiling as if it may offer an answer. “I’m a crappy friend, but not that crappy. Happy birthday, wonder boy.”
There’s a creak in his heart, a lightness in his ribcage, a balloon of affection despite their troubled history that inflates just for her. “You remember my birthday?”
She makes a sound at the back of her throat. Glances at him from the corner of her eye. “Well, we picked it together, silly, so sure I do.” Shadows fall over her features when she angles her head away. “I… I never thought I would come back—that it was better this way.”
“I’m glad you did.”
Something close to a smile ghosts over her face at his response. Ekko can’t rip his gaze away from her. He fears that if he does, he’ll wake up and she’ll be gone again, and he’ll have to relive the agony of losing her again.
“Does Vi—”
“No. No. And it’s better this way.”
“But—”
“Drop it, Ekko. Please.”
He does. Because this is too good to be true, and he doesn’t want this to end. Emotions mix inside him, battling for dominance, so he sits there, letting them all wash over him.
“You’ve been busy,” she says abruptly, nodding her head in the general direction of the outside world. “Their new wonder boy. I’m not surprised. You’ve always been good at creating things. Good things.”
“And you’ve always been good at fixing them,” he says.
Ekko thinks back on the countless times she helped him to fix up old rubbish others have discarded and sell them in Benzo’s shop as small treasures. It feels, now, like a lifetime ago. In a sense, it has been.
She snorts; it’s an ugly, hateful sound. “Not always.”
There’s weight to how she says it. Pain lingers in each syllable, more so a whispered confession. She’s thinking of others, those lost through accidents or her own direct involvement.
“I’m sorry about Isha,” Ekko says carefully, thumb pressing into the hollow of his bare knee. He itches to take her hand, to smooth his thumb over her knuckles instead, but he doesn’t. She’s never been his to touch. “Vi told me about her.”
Jinx shrinks, turning away and he mentally curses. A sore spot even years later. Understandably so.
“I… shit. Sorry.”
“What’s with the long face?” she exclaims suddenly, jumping to her feet and twirling. Her hands drop to her hips and she grins at him, all mischief. “C’mon, we gotta get out of here.”
Ekko squints. “Uh, what?”
“It’s your birthday, silly,” she says, like it should be obvious. “We’re going to spend the day together.”
.
Jinx keeps her hood up, her gait steady. Any sign of blue tucked away. She’s changed her attire to draw less attention, and as they walk in the hazy dawn light towards the bridge separating the sister cities, it feels almost normal. Casual. Not at all like the last time they spoke, they were about to fight side by side in a battle for their lives. Not at all like he spent two years thinking she’s dead. That still stings, but knowing how she felt back then, the state she was in before he talked her down from the edge, the pain she’s been through, Ekko can’t bring himself to feel resentful. He only wants to hold her and tell her it’ll be okay because she’s not alone.
“You’re not saying, are you?” he asks, hands in his pockets.
“Nope,” she replies, popping the p. “Can’t.”
Words rush to his tongue. Insistence that she can and should stay—that there’s space here for her, not just in his life, but in the new Zaun he’s helping to shape. He almost admits it to her then. That he’s built this for her and the ones they lost along the way.
Ekko continues walking, staring at the ground, noticing too late she’s fallen behind. He peers over his shoulder and freezes when he notices what’s caught her attention. The mural. Welcoming anyone coming into Zaun. Her face, slightly younger but now immortalised, peers back at them.
“You drew this.”
He loosens a breath. “Yeah, I did. I, uh, just…”
Jinx reaches for her own face, fingertips ghosting over the painted wall. There’s tension on her face when she turns to look at him, something piercing and hard and thoughtful. Same pinch to her eyebrows he saw earlier in his bedroom.
“I won’t let them take you,” he says softly. “If they came for you. I would fight for you.”
She doesn’t break their eye contact. “I know. You shouldn’t, but I know you would.”
“Then stay.”
She saunters forward, stopping only when they’re almost chest to chest. “I’m not her, y’know? The other me. The one you love.”
He smiles, huffing a small breath, refocusing on her and her small pout. Ekko reaches forward, tucking a few stray strands back under Jinx’s hood, lingering for a beat. “I wasn’t her Ekko, either. That’s why I came back. I like this version of you just fine. But just so we’re clear, every version of you is a pain in my ass.” He tugs on a small braid, grinning when she shoots him an annoyed glare and slaps his hand away. “But I won’t have it any other way. Wait, no. It sure as hell would be simpler if you didn’t try to kill me anymore, but I guess I’ll deal with that, too.”
Jinx snorts, absently reaching for the spot he touched, her gaze softer than before. “Ha! You hit like a girl, by the way. I never got to tell you.”
“You tried to blow us up.”
“Eh,” she whines. “That was one time. You gotta let that go.”
Ekko exhales a small laugh and realises he hasn’t smiled or laughed this much in years. Joy was leeched from him with her absence, and while he did his duties, there was no security of Jinx’s usual push and pull to keep him balanced and focused. Even when they were enemies, hunted each other down and attacked each other, they existed on opposite sides of a perfectly balanced sphere.
Her nearness, the relief of having her there, overshadows the darker recollection of that afternoon when she tried to blow them up more than once. Memories so painful Ekko wishes to scrub them from his mind forever, yet they remain seared into his psyche.
She grabs his elbow, dragging him forward, breaking the surrounding gloom. “Come on then,. Things to do, things to see.”
And Ekko does what he’s done since they were young. He follows her. Because they might not have tomorrow.
.
The day goes by too fast. Almost a blur. A series of snapshots Ekko will lock away in his mind forever. He never expected he’d get to do this again. This is something his younger self could have only dreamt about once. When they dreamt of simpler things; flashy toys and delicious sweets, things only a young boy could fantasise about, aside from a loving home, because at least that much he had.
They walked and talked and joked around, eating street vendor food all day. Ekko knows they’re pushing their luck, but he can’t help himself. Jinx grew up here. This is her home too, and he wants to show her the progress they’ve made. There’s something comfortable about her snarky commentary and ill-timed jibes at the Council members. She asks about Vi only once, in relation to Cait, and Ekko tells her the truth.
They’re happy. They’re together. She nods, satisfied, and moves on.
“We should go see Jericho next.” It’s an offhand suggestion while they walk the newly paved river path. Now people from the Undercity can enjoy the same luxury of having a peaceful sidewalk to take their kids down. It’s amazing how it’s the small things that bring people happiness.
“Can’t,” Jinx replies, glancing towards the setting sun. Her smile twists; it’s still a smile, but it’s sad, in a way. “Sorry, hero.”
He takes several seconds to speak. “So, you’re leaving anyway.”
“Yes. I told you I can’t stay.”
“It’s a pity, then.”
She tilts her head. “Why?”
Damn her for even asking. Damn her and all the shitty circumstances for keeping them apart. Damn her for picking him during that game of hide and seek years ago. Damn her for being there for him and not being there at the same time. Damn her for being his entire world for years. Even when Ekko thought he hated her, he wasn’t free of her. He never could be. His girl with blue hair.
He’s in love with her, in every possible way, but they both know they can’t work like this. There’s too many ghosts for Jinx here, and despite the changes, Ekko can’t promise her she won’t get dragged off to Stillwater the moment authorities find out she’s alive after all.
Ekko frowns, clenches his fists, and walks away.
But she’s like an anchor to him. He stops several paces away, tied to her. “You’re gonna break my heart.”
They’ve been everything from friends to enemies and strangers to reluctant allies again. So much of his life has revolved around her. Continues to revolve around her. Past and present. But if Jinx sends him away now, if she walks away, Ekko will let her go. Because he can finally rest easy, knowing she is alive and well, even if they’re apart.
“In any other universe, I might have loved you,” she breathes.
He pivots towards her, his nostrils flaring. “Love me in this one,” he insists, reaching for her. Ekko cups her cheeks, tilting her head until her hood slips back down, exposing her blue hair to the setting sun. He’s glad there’s no one in sight because he can’t think straight right now. “Choose me now. Ask me to go away with you. Ask me.”
He presses his forehead to hers. Jinx’s empty gaze appears glazed over, her thoughts far away no matter how hard he tries to grip her and hold her close.
“I don’t deserve you, boy saviour,” she whispers emptily. “You’re good.”
“No one decides for me, Jinx. Not even you.”
She blinks owlishly, searching his wild stare, a pained expression on her face, her fingers knotting against her chest. “What if you don’t want me after a while? I’m… different and if I get bad again... What if—”
“Ask me, damnit.”
Jinx loosens a shaky breath, jumping through a hundred micro-expressions in a few seconds. A painful mix between hope and dread.
“C…” Her eyes squeeze shut. “Come with me.”
Ekko sags in relief. “Yes.” He holds her, wraps his arms around her despite the unsure way she folds against him. As if she’s unsure where to put her hands. If she should. “Yes, I’ll come with you. I don’t care if you’re different. I want you as you are, okay? No matter where we are.”
A tremulous breath wheezes past Jinx’s lips. But with that, she melts into him, burying her face against him. Her embrace grows desperate and tight, a tremble shuddering through her body.
“Always a dance with you, huh?” he says after a moment.
She chuckles, the sound warming his collarbone. “And you still got two left feet, boy wonder.”
Constants and variables, young Ekko, Benzo told him once. Everything bad that can happen in this universe might come to pass, but so might everything good.
----
an: ahh I know this isn't really my usual offering but I really hope you guys enjoyed, it's been a while since i've cared enough about canon/canon ship to do this.
#arcane#ekko x jinx#timebomb#ekkojinx#arcane fic#asks#thank you for asking anon!! just a tiny 'sort of fix-it'
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Saved Him
Eddie Munson x Reader
Summary: When news came to you about Chrissy's death, you wondered just why she was with your boyfriend at the time. You knew he had a crush on her a while back but Eddie swore he was over her because he liked you.
A Satanist?
A cultist?
A murderer?
Your Eddie?
No.
These people were just blinded by rage and fear.
Jason was also blind.
And fucking dumb.
He claims he saw things. Which you don't deny, but it wasn't Eddie's doing. And you knew that better than anyone.
You have been his friend since middle school, and his girlfriend for the last 2 years. You knew him better than anyone.
You knew about his struggles, hobbies, friends, and favourite places. You knew everything.
And you also had a feeling about where to find him.
Skull Rock.
You followed the kids there and surely enough, there he was.
"Eddie?"
"Y/N!" he rushed to you, hugging you. "I didn't do any of that."
"I know." you hugged him tighter. "I know you didn't." you smiled as you pulled back and he kissed you.
The same kiss he always gave you when you felt bad, to calm you, to encourage you, to show you that he loves you.
But this kiss was also filled with fear.
You heard the others groan as Dustin spoke.
"We don't have time for this."
You had a lot of catch-up to do. And you couldn't wait for an explanation.
But now, for now, you were just happy to have your Eddie back.
Later, as everyone was getting ready, you watched Dustin and Eddie bond before he came over to you.
"Are you ready for this?" he asked and you looked into his eyes.
"I understand the nightmares come from Vecna, I understand how miserable it must be to have such nightmares. What I don't get is why was she at your place?"
"Is that really all you can think about when we are heading to death?"
You looked at him with no emotion on your face, but your eyes said every word your mouth refused.
He let out a sigh and grabbed your hands into his.
"I do not, did not love Chrissy. She wanted to put her mind at ease because of the nightmares. I only wanted to help her."
"But you get it how it looks? Do you know how many times I have Jason tell me that his girlfriend was with my boyfriend when she died? Do you know the whispers and looks I got?"
"Why do you care so much about what people say?"
"Because they are telling me that you cheated on me. That you don't love me and it fucking hurts, Eddie." you tried your best not to raise your voice, the others don't need to hear your argument.
"But I do love you and I would never cheat on you, Darling."
"I know. This is why I feel like I'm being pulled into two pieces. One part of me understands and knows that you love me. The other is extremely jealous and furious."
"No need for you to be jealous, My Love." he lifted and kissed the back of your hand. "I promise, I only love you."
"I love you too Eddie." the sincere look in his eyes helped you calm down the rising storm.
---
Eddie was being attacked when you let out a yell. To save his life, you needed the attention of those flying things.
"HEY YOU DUMB THINGS FOLLOW ME!" you yelled and it got their attention. "Dustin! Help Eddie!" you yelled as you ran away.
You managed to lock yourself into a car hoping those things would give up.
But as they banged on the windows and doors of the car, you weren't so sure you would survive.
One moment later, it all stopped.
All banging, all screaming, everything just stopped.
It took you a couple of minutes to get out of the car, you looked for Eddie and Dustin and you soon found them in the trailer. You rushed over to Eddie and hugged him.
"You saved me." he said. "Thank you." he tightened his grip as you let out a long sigh of relief.
He was alive.
He was fine.
He was holding you.
"I love you."
He loved you.
Taglist:
@castellandiangelo @imagines-by-a-typical-fangirl @manduse @jacalineiscomingforyou
@mandoloriancookie @deliciousfestsalad @lilliumrorum @asgards-princess-of-mischief
@fallout-girl219 @dracaryxzs @snowtargaryen
~Masterlist~
ˇAO3ˇ
/YOU DO NOT HAVE PERMISSION TO TRANSLATE, TO STEAL OR TO REUPLOAD ANY OF MY WORKS TO THIS OR OTHER PLATFORMS/
#x reader#fanfiction#x female reader#stranger things#stranger things 4#stranger things x reader#stranger things x you#stranger things x y/n#stranger things imagine#stranger things imagines#Eddie Munson x Reader#eddie munson x you#eddie munson x y/n#eddie munson x female reader#eddie munson fanfic#eddie munson fluff#stranger things fic#Eddie Munson imagine#Eddie Munson imagines#eddie munson smut
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tuesday teases
Haven’t been around in a million years but the show baited me with delicious Eddie angst. So. Hello lovely little gay people in my phone. Would you like some Tuesday fic teases?
@tizniz @hippolotamus @chaosandwolves @inell @smilingbuckley @spotsandsocks @daffi-990 @exhuastedpigeon @blutterlie @thelikesofus @ronordmann @dr-shortsighted-owl @lovecolibri @eddiebabygirldiaz @fiona-fififi @thekristen999
Here’s the ridiculous boys after the realtor phone call meeting…
“She probably wasn’t thinking anything one way or the other. She’s just focused on her job and finding us— me. Me, technically. A house.”
No. Not just Eddie. Their house. It would be theirs. Even if Buck isn’t there. Even if he never steps one foot into it. Eddie’s home is still Buck’s home. That won’t change. Ever.
But he can’t say that. How does he say that?
He gets up from the couch and grabs his empty mug. “You still want to make snickerdoodles? Or some other cookie? Or, what did you call it? Cake masquerading as loaf bread?” Eddie doesn’t wait for an answer. He goes into the kitchen and gets out the stash of flour he’s recently acquired.
He stocked up. Just in case. Can’t have the alternative of Buck without his baking.
Eddie sets one of the ten pound bags on the counter then grabs a pack of butter and the carton of eggs from the fridge and finds the measuring cups and spoons in their drawer. The basket Buck made years ago during quarantine is next. It holds the vanilla, the baking powder and soda, various flavored extracts, finishing salt, molasses, packets of instant yeast, chocolate chips, other baking essentials. He takes the jar of cinnamon from the spice rack in the cupboard, goes to put it with everything, but finds Buck staring from the kitchen doorway.
He looks too wistful. Too heartbroken. And all Eddie can offer is a kitchen and ingredients. He doesn’t have anything else.
Was it really that much of a loss? They were only together for six months. Did Buck really want to spend his life with the guy? It couldn’t have been that serious. It never is.
None of the people Buck’s dated are good enough for him.
Maybe Buck isn’t thinking of his ex right now. Maybe he’s thinking about the kid who was like a son to him.
Or the whole Eddie moving to El Paso thing. He seems fine, for the most part. He’s helping. But that’s what Buck does. He helps. He supports. Even when he shouldn’t.
But Buck has bad relationships to get over. He’s not really thinking about Eddie or Eddie’s problems. He’s focusing on a task so that his mind doesn’t wander where it shouldn’t.
Buck would be fine without Eddie. Hell, he’s probably better off. Or he will be.
Eddie asks too much of him. He takes up too much of Buck's time with his issues.
Eddie looks through the little stock pile he’s put together. “Anything else you need?”
Buck looks, stands beside him, and answers, “Sugar?”
Sugar.
Eddie’s stomach twists. It’s not a pet name. It’s an answer. Not a term of endearment. Answer. And of course it slipped Eddie’s mind. Why wouldn’t something that huge and essential be missing from his offering. He should have some though. Buried in the back of the pantry. He finds white, brown, and confectioner’s, and adds them to the supply. “All yours. Whatever you want to make. I’ll run to the store and get more if you need anything. We should have plenty of flour though. I got you five bags.”
Buck’s head snaps toward him. “Five bags? You got me five bags of flour? Like, two pound ones, right? Or the five pounders?”
Eddie shakes his head and gestures. “No, the tens. Like that one.”
“You bought me fifty pounds of flour?”
“Well, you’re the one who decided his coping mechanism was snickerdoodles and sourdough. I’m just being supportive. Since you’re my wingman and I’m yours or whatever you said when you stole my tablet and my realtor call.”
Buck huffs but smirks. “More like saved your call.”
More like saved Eddie’s everything but who’s counting?
#buddie#buddie wip#jenwyn wip#fic: snickerdoodles of longing#idk that’s what the title is in my head#don’t look at me#tease tidbit tuesday#911 spoilers#911
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Ekko and Mel......now that was personal. They really gave them the Magical Negro™ treatment and no time to explore it. And oh boy, am I tired of it. I hate the narrative of black characters having to self-sacrifice for people who would not do the same for them. Could you imagine being fucked with by something like the Arcane or LeBlanc for allegedly a year or so,just to immediately go to war the moment you're back in normal surroundings? Do they get a break at all? Like damn.
Neither of these characters nor their trauma was ever taken seriously. I haven't forgotten how this fandom acted towards Mel in season one because of her entanglement with Jayce and the blatant slut-shaming and misogynoir that came with it. Nor have I forgotten how Ekko and his dynamic with Jinx was hyped up for the past three years to market season 2, just to barely get screen time in said season (outside saving everyone's ass in the finale).
(Insert the Rose McGowan saying "Imagine how tired we are" meme.)
ok so there are some aspects of this that i agree and disagree with
- the self-sacrificing part i disagree with. yes both characters have miserable endings but other characters also sacrificed themselves for others i.e. jinx, viktor, jayce so i don’t think this specifically is just a mel and ekko thing. i also do believe that atleast ekko has characters who would 100% sacrifice themselves for him aka jinx, maybe vi. as for mel, she is very alone and it’s miserable but she’s also the character most likely to be in the show forwards (noxus seasons) so i doubt this is the end for her.
- i agree that we should’ve seen more consequences of what they went through. the black rose and mel and leblanc deffo should’ve had more emphasis and it’s really annoying we didn’t actually learn shit about that. again, hopefully the noxus show will elaborate. as for ekko, we did get an entire episode focused on him but i still agree that we should’ve seen more from when he got back. with the amount that timebomb was hyped up we absolutely should’ve seen more of it and the fact we didn’t was a massive shame and entirely netflix’s fault (the finale was supposed to be over an hour but was forced to be cut down). i rlly hope they release those scenes :((
- i agree that the fandom definitely needs to fix up on mel. i understand people disliking her when season 1 released because there were a lot of unknowns but anyone who hates on mel just to serve jayvik deserves to be shot maddie style. you don’t have to like a character but people also need to learn to not be a misogynistic twat too.
generally, i get where your coming from because things were really rushed and we didn’t get to see as much development as was actually written, but i don’t see it as a race issue since it’s not only mel and ekko who were done dirty like this but also many others (vi, jinx, isha, sevika) who didn’t get the on screen time they deserved. idk lol
#i am half black btw#lol#this is just my take#arcane#arcane spoilers#arcane season 2#ekko#timebomb#mel medarda#jinx#ekko arcane#jinx arcane#league of legends
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I think that Dean is honestly one of the best eldest siblings ever written. I'm currently on season 9 and I'm still deeply affected by the ending of season 2. As an older sister myself who had to look after my little sister and fix up her wounds when my parents weren't around I know how it feels. It's so rare to see such a well portrayed parentified older sibling and I'm grateful for it. I particularly like how they are written, a lot of people hate Dean for his misogynistic view of women especially in the earlier seasons and honestly at first I was a little disturbed by it and then I realised it was actually so accurate, what I'm trying to say is that Dean never got to be a child, the way he jokes about literally everything and seems to be a 'womaniser' is because he wants to be noticed. I don't want anyone to start saying 'no it's because of his mommy issues' shut up it's not!!! He has to put on an act, a persona and he chose the persona of a womaniser who doesn't give a shit about anyone and doesn't care much about objectifying women in public because he wants to be seen that way. He wanted his little brother to look up to him and see a father figure. I know it doesn't make much sense really but I get it, it's hard because at the same time I'm very aware he's written by men and what I'm analysing is just my view on this but, to write a man who cries so often, who shows so often vulnerability that to men with a fragile masculinity see as 'pathetic' (aka John) seems to be opposing the other side of his character who is a douche bag, it seems to me that it was written purposely. Dean is nothing like his father, he isn't a douche with a fragile masculinity, he is vulnerable and he cares so deeply about everyone. He had to put up this persona in order to survive, because he needed to be seen as the tough guy with strength and who doesn't let women be his equal, he was playing the part of a misogynistic douche to survive. Again that's just how I see it, but his character development to me is honestly the biggest proof of that, he got tired over the years of playing this role and then Castiel arrived and I believe that he showed him that men are really nothing, that the world is much bigger than himself and I think Castiel's arrival gave him faith, it's a faith he had never had before, the proof that God exists no matter if he cares or not, he exists and that I think changed everything, he was saved by this angel who saw in him a great potential. For the first time in his life he was the first choice, he was seen as who he really is so he dropped his act and little by little became the good man he was always.
Again I'm pretty tired I should have been asleep hours ago and I'm just yapping but yeah I miss my sister and god he's so relatable, I wish an angel could save me like me when I'm tired
feel free to debate with me thehehe
i love to read too much into things like ik it's not that deep but leave me alone I like making things deep
#supernatural#spn#supernatural fandom#dean winchester#sam and dean#dean spn#jensen ackles#john winchester#sam winchester#castiel#supernatural meta
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Fault Lines
CHAPTER ONE
a/n: oops, the need to consume more arcane led to this
pairing: Viktor x OC
warnings: none!
word count: 3.7k
MASTERLIST
——————————
Had Viktor known partnering with Jayce Talis six years ago meant he came with a pet, he might have let Jayce succumb to the catastrophic consequences of his explosive (revolutionary) theory, absolving himself of what often felt like a second, unintended partnership. Well, Rosie wasn’t a pet, per say, indeed very much human. Piltover’s Golden Girl, but still human. He would not have minded Jayce’s leech so much, or was Jayce her leech, the lines blurred, if she did not make her presence so noticeable. It seemed she had been crafted by the gods with the sole purpose of getting on his nerves, a distraction. Jayce adored her, enjoyed the chaos, enjoyed the humming. That faint, lilting melody with no discernable tune, infuriatingly persistent. It managed to weave itself into the rhythm of Viktor’s thoughts, like water seeping through a crack. No matter how he tried to drown it out, how loud his tools were, it persisted, an uninvited guest.
He’s unsure what compelled him to believe today might’ve been different. She had been admittedly quiet for a much longer period than usual, so perhaps it was false hope, toying with his desperation for silence he had not had in a long time, hanging in front of him, just high enough where he could not reach. He should have known better.
It barely rose above the drill in his hand, blending into the mechanical whirr as he worked on the metal arm atop his desk, but when he released the trigger and the tool fell silent, the sound continued. A hum. His head snapped up, golden eyes narrowing at the woman at the opposite end of the room that sat perched like some contented cat on a stool too high for comfort. Rosie’s face was hidden behind a book, its cover emblazoned with the title in bold, elegant script: Flourish Without Air: The Science of Oxygen-Free Plant Growth. An odd choice for her, Viktor thought, and turned his focus back to his tinkering, trying to block her out.
The door that led to the Academy hallway burst open with a thud, and he did not have to look up from his work to know who it was.
“Late,” Viktor said, the single word holding the weight of a reprimand. He didn’t turn around, didn’t need to.
“I know, I know,” Jayce replied, his voice carrying its usual blend of warmth and exasperation. “Save me the lecture.”
The humming stopped. “Lost track of time?” Rosie chimed in, maddingly chipper. “Got too invested in the art?” Her final word was emphasized just enough to imply a hidden meaning, some private joke between them.
Jayce groaned audibly. “I’ve told you, I’m not interested in art.”
“Sure, you aren’t.”
Viktor raised an eyebrow, finally looking up from the metal arm he had been tinkering on. “Art?” he repeated, his gaze flicking between the two of them with muted interest.
“It’s nothing,” Jayce said, a little too quickly, his words tumbling over themselves in his eagerness to shut down the topic. He was halfway across the room now, making a beeline for Viktor’s area of the long desk that lined the back wall of the lab.
Viktor didn’t miss the way Jayce’s jaw tightened, the way his brow furrowed as he sent an irritated look in Rosie’s direction, who was still seated on a stool. She, unfazed, mouthed something silently back at him, her smug, delighted expression barely hidden behind her book. Viktor didn’t catch the words, but honestly, he didn’t care to, finding the exchange to be immature.
Jayce caught Viktor’s unamused stare, and his brow smoothed into an overly bright expression. “Oh! There’s a surprise for you,” he said, turning toward Rosie with a grin that was just a little too wide, a little too practiced.
Her head tilted slightly, a few ginger strands of hair fell over her shoulder as curiosity flickered across her face. She straightened up, closing the book she’d been engrossed in and set it aside. “Surprise?” she echoed, her voice intrigued, though edged with slight skepticism. Her tone said she’d heard this before, likely more than once. She folded her arms loosely, casualness that didn’t quite mask her piqued attention.
Ah, the surprise. Viktor resisted the urge to sigh as he turned his focus back to his ‘hexclaw’, picking up a screwdriver. He’d heard about it too many times already, Jayce had been mulling over the idea since the beginning of the year. “A gift,” he had explained, despite Viktor never asking for elaboration, a token of appreciation for everything she had contributed financially for their work over the years.
Viktor found Jayce’s gift idea baffling then and found it no less baffling now, and perhaps even a bit misplaced. There were many others with brilliant minds who lacked opportunity, forever hidden in the shadows of the elite, those perhaps a little more deserving, those who were not already provided for. That wasn’t to say Rosie was undeserving or unintelligent—far from it; he’d made that mistake early on, assuming her mind and wit were limited to social arenas and her artistic pursuits, he quickly realized how incredibly incorrect he had been. It came in slips—a casual comment here, a nonchalant observation there. She’d interrupt to answer complex equations about rune calibrations as though she were reciting the day’s weather of sunny skies with no chance of rain. He first thought she was guessing, but she had yet to be wrong. The first time might have been luck, the second, coincidence. Third and fourth? Practically impossible. And yet, despite her undeniable aptitude, she never expressed any extreme interest in a scientific niche.
But Rosie was Jayce’s “dear friend”, and this was Jayce’s gift, it wasn’t Viktor’s place to question, and frankly, he did not care enough to argue. And if it meant she would be out of the lab for a while—taking her infernal humming with her—he wouldn’t complain too much.
“What is it?” Rosie asked.
“It would not be a surprise if he told you,” Viktor interjected without glancing up, his voice flat, carrying the faintest edge of dry amusement.
Jayce rolled his eyes, unimpressed by Viktor’s lack of enthusiasm. “It’s a gift. From us,” he said, turning back to her with a wide grin.
Us.
Viktor’s hand briefly froze over the Hexclaw. It was not from them, this was a Jayce initiative, through and through. Viktor hadn’t contributed to it, hadn’t suggested it, hadn’t even particularly supported the idea. And there was Jayce, dragging his name into it, as though he had been some eager participant.
His grip on the screwdriver tightened. He had long since grown accustomed to Jayce’s habit of roping him into things he wanted no part of, but he didn’t understand Jayce’s incessant need to build a bridge between him and Rosie over the years, constantly, in the minutiae of their daily lives. She liked her coffee with honey, and Viktor knew this only because Jayce always handed him the honey packet to pass to her, insisting it was easier that way. It wasn’t, it wasn’t easier for Viktor to intercept and awkwardly hand it off. He eventually started bringing the packets himself to save Jayce the trouble of manufacturing another pointless connection between them.
”You’ll see it tonight,” Jayce said, still grinning, either oblivious or simply ignoring Viktor’s irritation.
“Viki, do you wager he’ll tell me before then?”
That name. It was a particular source of agitation for him. Since the day Jayce had introduced them, Rosie latched onto it immediately, as if they were friends that had known each for years before.
He had never corrected her though, not once.
She was prone to outbursts more than he, saying something would have only invited unnecessary confrontation, and Viktor didn’t find it worth the energy. Still, the nickname wasn’t any less annoying in his silence. It grated on him, chipping away at his patience each time it fell from her lips.
“I doubt it,” he replied, his voice steady and disinterested. He decided he would in fact be very glad she would be leaving their lab for good, gone somewhere else, somewhere that wasn’t there.
“Shame,” Rosie said, her tone light. “I guess I won’t be finding out what it is today then.”
Jayce’s brows drew together in sudden realization. “Shit,” he muttered, running a hand through his freshly cut hair. “I’m sorry, I completely forgot about your rehearsals.”
She waved a hand dismissively. “You’re alright, Jayce,” she said, her voice warm. “I know you’ve got a lot going on here,” she gestured broadly to the lab, “and up there.” She punctuated her words with a playful flick to the side of his head as she walked past him.
Jayce huffed a small laugh as he shook his head. She made her way across the room to where her bag lay haphazardly against the wall. There was a faint rustle of paper as she tucked her book into her bag.
Viktor presumed it was about a gala, but didn't dwell. Rosie’s career was a subject that rarely concerned him. What mattered was she’d be leaving soon for the day, and he could feel the tension in his shoulders ease at the thought.
The small screw Viktor had been adjusting gave more resistance than it should’ve, and with a bit too much force from tightening, seized up. He quickly twisted the tool in his hand back, attempting to loosen the screw, but he could feel the lack of grip against the stripped threading. It was ruined, unusable and unsalvageable. He instinctively reached for a small tin box to his left, his hand brushing against the cool metal lid before flipping it open.
Empty.
His fingers hovered for a moment over the hollow interior before he glanced over. He’d used all the screws. His lips pressed into a thin line as he closed the lid with a sharp snap.
Viktor grabbed his cane from beside his chair and pushed himself up, crossing the room to the cluttered corner Jayce had claimed as his workstation.
Jayce paused mid conversation with Rosie when he glanced over and saw Viktor rifling through the mess. “What’re you looking for?” He asked, stepping toward him, his tone curious.
“Screws,” Viktor replied without looking up, voice flat. He shifted a few loose bolts and a cracked lense aside. “Unless you’ve moved them again.”
Jayce reached down to shuffle through a stack of papers on his desk. Beneath the clutter, he pulled out his own tin box, popping the lid open with a flick of his thumb.
Also empty.
“Guess we’re out,” Jayce said.
Viktor gave a long sigh. Of course. Just his luck. He could place an order for more through the Academy, but with the amount of middle men it would have to pass through, delivery would take days, and he didn’t have that kind of time to allow his project to sit idly for. That left him with one option.
He moved back toward his corner of the lab, retrieving his coat from the back of his chair and shrugged it on. “Ensure Miss Young locks the lab if I’m not back before you leave,” He said over his shoulder, addressing Jayce.
“Where are you going?” Rosie asked as he walked toward the door.
“Screws,” he replied curtly, tone clipped and devoid of elaboration.
“Well, goodbye to you too, Viki,” she quipped, her voice dripping with sarcasm.
Viktor didn’t pause, didn’t look back, didn’t dignify her comment with a response. He grabbed the handle, twisted it and pulled the door open toward him, stepping into the hallway, leaving the lab and its occupants behind.
He hadn’t intended to take as long as he did. By the time Viktor had begun retracing his steps the sun was already gone, dipped far below the horizon. The store had been decently far to begin with, nestled along the cliffside edge of Piltover, but Viktor’s practicality still sometimes gave way to habit, and he had found himself taking a detour after the shop, adding what he hadn’t realized then to be hours to his time away.
He had found the spot as a child, and it was one of the few things that stuck with him through the years. He liked to go there when the weight of his work pressed too heavily, when he needed inspiration or shift in perspective, and just linger. The air there was cooler, it carried a scent of damp iron from the pipes of the city’s waterworks. It was secluded, just for him. His sanctuary of steel.
Viktor had set his own deadline to finish the hexclaw by Progress Day, and despite still being months away, he could feel it ticking closer with each passing day. It wasn’t essential to his and Jayce’s presentation to the council, ancillary at best, another tool in the arsenal of what Hextech could achieve, but he still wanted it to work, to function as flawlessly as the vision in his mind. Perhaps it was a point of pride, or humanity, as much as he sought to rise above it, an urge to perfect, to show off. Not to seek validation, he was confident enough of his mind, there was simply a certain satisfaction that came with demonstrating the full breadth of what was possible, not only to enhance, but to transcend human limitation. But perhaps he might’ve been shooting too far beyond what was objectively possible in the moment, having to remind his ambitions he was still only in today.
Viktor passed the steel bridge that connected Piltover to its sister city on his walk back after his detour to the water treatment facility. A pair of enforcers could be seen lingering at the far end, the Undercity end. They stood stiffly in their navy and gold uniforms as they monitored the crossing, though there was little activity to surveil. Few people ventured between cities this late. Viktor’s attention drifted to the gleaming arches that marked the start of the bridge. A marvel of Piltover’s engenuity, a symbol of unity, they called it. To him, it was more illusion than truth. To him, the bridge merely emphasized their divide, a glittering, steel reminder of everything the Undercity lacked and Piltover hoarded.
He was ready to turn his focus back to his path ahead when he heard it—a hum. His steps slowed, the sound prickling at his ears in a way that set his teeth on edge. It was a familiar melody, one he couldn’t quite place, but it wasn’t the tune itself that agitated him, but the person behind it. His golden eyes scanned the empty stretch of the bridge, searching for the source.
He spotted Rosie sitting on one of the benches towards the center of the bridge, almost perfectly suspended between the two cities. Her red hair was unmistakable even in the dim light. She was hunched slightly forward with her elbows resting on her knees, her gaze distant as if she were looking at something in front of her that Viktor couldn’t see.
The hum continued, soft and unhurried, filling the otherwise quiet night.
He hadn’t intended to stop, hadn’t intended to linger, but now that he saw her, leaving without saying something felt as impossible as turning back toward the lap without the screws rattling in his coat. He hesitated for a moment before approaching her. The clink of his cane against the ground echoed softly with each of his uneven steps as he walked. Rosie’s hum trailed off as she noticed the sound, her head lifting up in mild surprise once she saw him.
“Viktor?” she said, her voice curious. “I didn’t expect to see you here.”
He stopped a few feet away. He realized she was still in her same clothes from earlier in the day, a fitted green shirt adorned with intricate gold stitching, with sleeves that stopped just above her elbows. It seemed ill-suited for the night’s chill.
“I might say the same,” he replied.
She gave a small smile, leaning back against the bench. “I’m here often,” she admitted. “I haven’t seen you yet, though.”
His gaze flicked briefly to the enforcers at the far end of the bridge, then back to her, weighing whether this conversation was worth engaging. Talking wasn’t what he’d come for.
“Are you not cold?” he asked instead, his tone carrying more observation rather than concern. He saw the way her body seemed to press into itself, her arms resting tightly against her sides, her shoulders hunched.
“Perhaps I misjudged the temperature,” she admitted, her voice airy, trying to play off her discomfort. She crossed her legs, pulling her arms in closer in a futile attempt to fend off the evening chill.
Viktor exhaled softly through his nose, a near-silent expression of mild exasperation. There were certain principles he could not—would not—abandon, ingrained into the marrow of his being as firmly as the constructs of his mind. Small things, perhaps insignificant to others, but immovable to him, and among them was a simple rule: no matter the circumstance, he would not stand idly by while another suffered discomfort that he himself could alleviate, and certainly not a woman freezing in the cold. It was his ethos, a tether to a part of himself that had not been worn away by ambition or cynicism.
His brown coat was well-worn, hardly a shield against Piltover’s winter nights, but it was layered over his vest, and his shirt’s sleeves extended far enough to cover his arms. He would endure; he always did.
Awkwardly, he shrugged off the coat, his cane wobbling when he let it go momentarily to free his hand to pull the coat fully from his shoulders. He held it out toward her, giving a faint nod.
Rosie’s brow arched as she took the offering, a flicker of amusement lighting her face. She slipped her arms into the fabric, adjusting it to sit comfortably over her frame. “Chivalrous much?” she teased.
Viktor’s expression remained neutral. “I have a code,” he replied, the words matter-of-fact.
She let out a quiet laugh as she tugged the coat tighter around herself. “I hope you don’t flirt like that,” she said, glancing sideways at him.
He shifted his weight against his cane as he readied himself to walk. “No,” he said, his gaze fixed forward, “it is merely how I conversate with you.”
Her laughter bubbled up again as she stood and fell into step beside him. Without further exchange, they began the walk back across the bridge toward Piltover. Neither felt the need to fill the silence, but Viktor knew it wouldn’t be for long, that she would speak again soon enough, filling the air with her observations, her quips, or whatever other thoughts happened to occupy her mind.
Rosie shook the coat gently, the faint clatter of tin boxes rattling within the pockets broke the quiet. She tilted her head, a grin tugging at her lips. “Your pockets are loud,” she said.
They approached one of Piltover’s green trolleys. “Unfortunate for me. Now you will be twice as loud,” he responded without missing a beat.
Rosie’s pale eyes widened in exaggerated disbelief, her grin morphing into mock offense. “What—hey!” she exclaimed, clutching the coat dramatically as though wounded.
He allowed himself the smaller flicker of satisfaction. Her reaction was gratifying enough to almost coax a smile from him, though he refrained. Silence descended between them again as they stepped into the trolley, the vehicle tilting faintly beneath their weight as it settled on its tracks, but this time the silence was different, lighter. He took a seat near the window, his cane resting at his side, while Rosie folded herself into the spot opposite of him.
Outside, Piltover passed in fleeting glimpses, the light from streetlamps flickering in and out as buildings interrupted their glow, creating moments of shadows interspersed with bursts of warm illumination. Rosie leaned back in her seat with an ease Viktor envied as the sound of the trolley wheels against their tracks filled the quiet.
Her voice cut through one of the darker moments. “It’s a vocal exercise,” she said, her words seemingly plucked from nowhere.
Viktor glanced at her, confused.
“The humming,” she continued, her gaze focused somewhere out the window. “I do it when I’m nervous too.”
He didn’t respond. Words hovered on the edge of his mind, but none took shape. What would he even say? It struck him then how little he knew of how to actually talk to her. He had spent years observing her the way he did with anyone in his orbit: Jayce, Skye, Heimerdinger, the occasional Academy scholar who crossed his path, she was no exception. He had learned her patterns, noted her tendencies. The way her voice got higher when she was about to offer a barb or a joke. Her legs always crossed when she sat in the lab, her foot even twining around the other calf and shin. She always wore shoes with a squared front, giving them the illusion of something weighty and clunky. And yet for all that, she was still… indecipherable.
Was this an invitation to talk? A moment offered for him to connect? Or was it simply an explanation, overdue and brought forth by his earlier comment about her being “loud”? Had he struck a nerve, made her feel she needed to defend herself?
The trolley slowed with a faint screech of metal on metal, easing to a stop. Viktor blinked, barely registering the movement across from him as Rosie stood up from her seat. She probably said something—a farewell, a “goodnight,” maybe—but her words barely reached him, muffled as if they were spoken from the other end of a long corridor. He gave her a tight-lipped nod, a vague acknowledgement of her departure before she stepped off and vanished into the night.
The trolley lurched forward again, the wheels humming as it resumed its path. Viktor leaned back, letting the sway of the carriage pull him out of his thoughts. It wasn’t until he glanced down at his grey sleeve cuffed above his wrist that he realized Rosie still had his coat.
And his screws.
His lips pressed into a thin line, though whether it was from annoyance or resignation, he couldn’t quite tell.
Progress, it seemed, would have to wait for morning.
#fnyw#arcane#arcane season 2#arcane season 1#arcane fanfic#arcane fandom#arcane fanfiction#Viktor#Viktor x oc#viktor arcane#arcane viktor#viktor fanfic#machine herald#Jayce#Jayce talis#viktor lol#hextech#piltover#piltover and zaun#zaun
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I got silly and infodumped again…
The fact that crystalised despite being the worst ninjago season by far- showed that for a long time now, possibly since season 11 has had his emotions turned off. Is crazy to me. Because I know Cole had a pretty okay moment with Zane about it and he ended up turning it back on in the same season or maybe even same episode I can’t fully recall. But I don’t know how mentally fucked these characters are or what- but I feel like no one stopped to think about that for enough time. Like Cole, he’s a very caring, affectionate, empathetic guy. Yet even he didn’t really seem to register the implications this had for Zane’s mental health. Zane is filled with so much emotional turmoil that he physically couldn’t bear to feel anymore. And this group of traumatised young adults were like- “oh haha Zane, that’s so quirky, that’s so silly of you, haha relatable anyway-“ Like duuuude I don’t know if this is the writers wanting to avoid actually discussing mental health in a “children’s” show or if these characters have had such little emotional awareness and support through their lives, almost dying everyday since they were teenagers that they are so desensitised to the horrors tm that they literally cannot tell when someone is basically holding a sign over their head saying “I NEED SERIOUS HELP.”
That kinda says a lot about Sensei wu, doesn’t it? I mean he’s great we Stan- but he did kinda adopt a bunch of struggling teenagers and burden them with saving the world and then allowed them to put themselves in harms way for years, without ever sitting them down and asking them if they were okay, emotionally? Like I don’t know if this happened and I didn’t see it or if it was implied to happen off screen but I really doubt wu was any sort of a support system for these guys that treated him like a father figure.
Maybe it’s because this cycle of pain goes back to wu as well, because he’s not the most stable person in the world either, but idk it feels crazy to me that these people that were basically family. Just- never checked in on eachothers well being or looked out for each others mental issues.
I mean they never really got a break and when they did- hell the only reason season 11 happened was because wu, so obsessed with the ninja being in tip top condition urged them to do something, which led these idiots to unleashing Aspheera and then ended up with probably the worst fate you could wish upon a Lego, for Zane. Seriously the fact they turned the ice emperor thing into a joke is so tone deaf to me like if this happened to your friend. In real life, (just suspend disbelief for a second) you would be absolutely GUTTED. You’d probably feel SO BAD. And that person? Probably can’t function like a normal individual anymore. Probably needs serious therapy. Not a joke.
I don’t hate wu, I never did. But I just think he’s been very irresponsible with the way he’s handled his students and while he’s wise in some aspects 70% of problems in the show could’ve been avoided if this old man valued communication.
And if this isn’t based on the characters flaws. And it’s Lego refusing to discuss mental illness and mental health. COME ON LEGO IT WOULD EDUCATE YOUR YOUNG AUDIENCE ON PTSD, ANXIETY AND HOW TO HEALTHILY DEAL WITH YOUR PROBLEMS. Because right now, if you wanna deal with issues the ninja way, YOU BURY THEM AND TAKE THEM TO THE GRAVE AND YOU NEVER COMPLAIN OR REST.
All I want is at least one episode where it’s not all about the current bad guy or plot and it’s just about the ninja actually confiding in one another and trying to help their friends out. Maybe Zane or Lloyd finally snap and have a full mental breakdown and the only way to deal with it is for them to actually talk about it and work it out. I’m sure you can make a compelling episode with that in mind. They’ve tried to address mental health in the show with Lloyds anxiety arc thing in DR they need to do better.
We need a scene in DR where Zane and Frohicky are at the monastery while the other ninja are doing stuff, (maybe I’ll work out the details more and write something on this) and something happens where all the pain and trauma and just, awfulness just builds up in Zane’s mind and he just. Has a moment where he cracks. And he stops working on whatever he’s working on. And Frohicky notices the shift in the air and suddenly his entire demeanour changes and he comes over concerned and Zane is standing there or kneeling and Frohicky puts his hand on his shoulder and asks. “Are you okay?” And Zane just doesn’t know how to respond. He tries to shake everything off but he can’t, he’s never been asked that before. And Frohicky starts babbling on trying to help him and offers to get him set up so he can rest, and Zane doesn’t have the strength to object or the will to say anything and he’s just like.
“I.. don’t know.” In a final response to the previous question.
And it’s just a scene where Zane accepts Frohickys gesture of kindness. And while not everything is fixed obviously. You can slowly see the tension leaving him.
Because it matters if someone asks you if you’re okay. It reaches into the darkest place and offers a hand saying “I’ll listen.” And that could genuinely change someone’s life.
#ninjago zane#zane ninjago#zane julien#lego ninjago#ninjago#ninjago dragons rising#dragons rising ninjago#Reposting this after deleting the last time I tried to post this because I posted it on the wrong day lol#just my unorganised thoughts#I actually decided to start writing that scene I described so when that’s finished I’ll post it#As always feel free to reblog or comment with your opinion/take on the conversation!#ofc no hate tho I do this out of immense love for the series#unless you wanna hate Misako
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⚠️arcane s2 act iii spoilers // criticism ⚠️
in caitlyn's post-war speech, she talks ambiguously of history and of ups and downs and of a story not yet over, but there's no promise for the future, no motivation to keep going, no bigger picture, no lesson learned. we're not shown much work being done either and i'm about to examine why it felt that way to me, leaving me a bit confused, somewhat unsatisfied, and deeply, profoundly sad
of course, jayce and viktor are dead. heimerdinger is gone, potentially also dead but unlike the latter two, we don't quite know what happened to him, he just kind of disappeared. i was left under the impression the were two ekkos - one for each universe, and our ekko's consciousness just changed bodies briefly due to the hexcore before heimerdinger managed to send him back to his own body in the right universe. but it seemed there was only one heimerdinger (body and soul) who'd traveled to the alternative universe as a package and lived there for a thousand years until our ekko came around in the alternative one's body, and instead of traveling back with him, heimerdinger's body and subsequently his consciousness ceased to exist. so... who's inventing things now? who's rebuilding piltover?
jinx and warwick (because there's no vander left there anymore, we made sure of that) are also presumably dead. we see how this is affecting ekko and vi, but not necessarily the undercity, for which jinx was a symbol of freedom, of unity - the perfect person who could've broken a cycle of violence, poverty and oppression. zaun doesn't get its sovereignty and seemingly loses its beacom of hope.
we see sevika as part of the council in piltover instead, but it's not like she's making merry with the other new counselors, in fact they throw her some nasty looks. and of course, i didn't expect it to be easy and it's admirable she's even there at all but unless i missed anyone, she's the only zaunite there out of 9 counselors (w/ zaun being 1/4 of piltover's population in canon afaik). i guess there's work to be done there but there was no indication of it even being able to go in a good direction, since she seems to have no backing from anyone now and again, we don't even know the extent to which the undercity managed to unify under her.
mel, a character always depicted in white and gold, an image of purity and mercy, defiant of her mother's brutality since childhood, now dons her red eyeshadow and sits on her throne on a ship for noxus. in an attempt to save her city, the city she was exhiled in to "learn" this brutality, to be hidden from the black rose from, and that's she's instead given her everything to care for (after barely getting the time to grapple with her own identity crisis and the predetermination of her fate) she's left no choice but to surrender her mother to the black rose, and watch her die in her arms. perhaps it is by virtue of noxian law she assumes her place and has to return to noxus. she leaves her beloved city in such a perilous and war-torn state, riddled with guilt and confusion. is she a wolf now? has she always been one?
ekko presumably grieves jinx by burning a piece of paper for her (my first thought was it was for heimerdinger, his "mentor" whose contributions and potential sacrifice made ekko coming back home possible, and with the time reversal device at that - but i interpreted it as being for jinx because it was in the place he kissed her alternate self in the alternative universe). what of ekko's future, of his commune? what happened to the tree getting corrupted? heimerdinger had plans to fix it with jayce's help or at least find the sickness' origin (the hexcore, yes, but we don't know if what happened to the tree got reversed), instead they found out the undercity was completely reliant on piltover's mercy for their water and air, and this knowledge seems to have died with them (bcuz i doubt ekko has the power to do anything about it).
caitlyn's looking at the kiramman house files, including city plans, potentially to rebuild things after the war but how? first of all, what are they gonna do with the hextech, the weapons, the gates, the magic in general? would they even want to try that again, and what implications would this have for piltover and zaun individually but for their precarious newly founded relationship? and secondly, she's a policewoman/detective turned anti-civil-war-commander turned just war commander, she's not an engineer or a scientist. all those ones? gone. all the people we know of who could rebuild the city in its previous progressive state are gone - jayce, viktor, heimerdinger, even jinx as a technological wildcar in vi's words. caitlyn seems to be telling the story or archiving files and plans for any future kirammans but she doesn't seem to have any work of her own to do anymore.
vi is the saddest case here, which says a lot. she's lost everything and is completely devoid of purpose. it's okay not to be okay, but what she says to caitlyn completely destroys me (and i'll do a separate, more detailed post but this shall do for now). she's depressed. easily. she's grieving jinx, humming a song her mother used to sing to them, the same one jinx was humming when we first saw her this season. when she says, "I'll always be dirt under your fingernails, cupcake." she isn't being cute, flirty, or romantic. she's being self-deprecating, indicating she deems her presence a nuisance to caitlyn, she deems herself unworthy and unwelcome in her house, but it's not like she's going anywhere. where else could she even go? caitlyn is all she has left. that's what she means when she says, "nothing's ever gonna clean me out", but perhaps even more so, she implies she's beyond repair, that she'll never be whole, never be truly okay again after this.
(the only person who got a "happy" ending, and the reason why this pisses me off is because he was truly vile and wicked and idc abt his motivations i will not be convinced otherwise, was fucking singed, who somehow got to have his immortalized robot daughter despite everything)
#arcane jayce#arcane viktor#arcane ambessa#arcane victor#arcane caitlyn#arcane 2#arcane season finale#arcane season two#arcane spoilers#arcane s2#arcane season 2#arcane vi#arcane powder#arcane jinx#arcane mel#arcane heimerdinger#arcane ekko#arcane singed#arcane caitvi#caitlyn arcane#vi arcane#arcane arc 3#arcane act 3#arcane vander#arcane warwick#arcane sevika#arcane series#arcane critical#arcane#arcane criticism
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Maybe your interpretation of the one bed trope with amangela?
Angela/Amanda - Amangela - One Bed
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It’s Vidcon season and everyone has been assigned rooms in the hotel. Angela wasn’t worried because she already knew she’d be paired with Amanda. It makes the most sense and they had paired together the first year at the hotel.
When the whole Smosh cast, leadership team, and the handful of their crew arrive at the hotel it’s Selina that starts handing out room keys. There are people you’d expect. Courtney and Shayne share a room – obviously – and then Ian and Anthony share a room even though Angela knows they had been offered to have single rooms because they are on the leadership team – and because they own the freaking company – and then there is Amanda and Angela.
It's Amanda that takes the keys and passes one to Angela.
It isn’t until Amanda and Angela lug their suitcases up to the room that Angela realizes there’s just one bed.
“Uh,” she says, looking at her key. “Is this a mistake?”
“What? The one bed? I don’t think so. Court told me they are trying to save money this year by having a lot of us share a bed.”
Angela flattens her lips and sets her key down on the desk in the room.
“Save money? Yeah right. I bet Ian and Anthony just said that so it wouldn’t look weird if they shared a room.”
“Honey, money or not, we both know they would have shared a room.”
Angela laughs and then flops down on the bed, spreading out starfish style. Amanda comes to the bed, leaning over it sideways so her face is floating above Angela.
“Do you not want to share a bed with me? Should I be offended? I thought we had fun last year!”
Angela sits up too fast and lucky Amanda pulls back so they don’t knock their foreheads together.
“I did have fun! I do have fun with you!”
It isn’t that Angela doesn’t want to room with Amanda. It’s just…maybe she’s been nursing a not so small crush on Amanda for months now. Sharing a bed with her for a weekend, it isn’t bad, it’s good but that’s the issue, it’s too good.
Amanda ruffles a hand through Angela’s hair.
“Good, we’re going to have fun. I brought my tarot cards again.”
The rest of that day passes quickly. The whole Smosh group in attendance goes out for dinner, not Bucca because they have a history of saving that for the last day of Vidcon, but a place with good food and drinks. Once they finish dinner and head back to the hotel, Angela toes off her shoes and tosses her jacket on to the chair at the desk. She flops into bed and rubs her belly with a sigh.
“I ate too much pasta.”
Amanda calmly takes off her own shoes and then her earrings. Angela watches and there’s something wonderfully and terrifyingly domestic about it all.
“I didn’t think that was possible,” Amanda teases.
Angela raises her middle finger lazily from the bed as Amanda grabs some clothes from her suitcase and then slips into the bathroom to change. As much as Angela doesn’t want to, she also forces herself up and then grabs her own pajamas.
“I’m changing out here!” Angela calls.
“Got it!” Amanda responds, her voice muffled from the closed bathroom door.
Angela quickly changes into a soft T-shirt and a beaten-up pair of shorts. Amanda comes out in a long pair of pajama pants and T-shirt. Her hair is down around her shoulders, and she’s taken off her make-up and though she’s dressed down Angela’s heart still flutters in her chest.
They do have to get up early the next morning for the beginning of all the Vidcon stuff. They have a loose schedule of panels, of socials, of free time to explore, and collaborate with others. Angela knows on Saturday she is due to dress up like Ian and explore the con for a member’s video, but either way, they can’t stay up too late fucking around.
Angela crawls back into bed, feeling weirdly nervous, and a little sick from the excess pasta. Amanda settles down too, tucking her legs under the heavy comforter on the bed. Angela follows suit, sliding under the covers. This isn’t the first time they’ve shared a bed, but the first time they’ve shared a bed for real.
Almost immediately Angela can feel Amanda’s body heat, cozy and warm under the cocoon of the blankets. She looks more angelic than she should with her head back on the pillows, dark hair like a halo around her head. Angela wants to scream.
“Ang?” Amanda says.
“Huh?” Angela says, suddenly pulled back into the here and now.
Amanda smiles brightly and affectionately. “Where’d you go, honey?”
Angela feels a heat on her face.” I was thinking.”
“About?”
“Work,” Angela lies.
Amanda tsks softly, “You’re such a workaholic, Ang.”
It’s true and Angela giggles nervously and nods. “I gotta work on it.”
Their conversation dies off as Amanda plays on her phone and Angela mindlessly scrolls on Instagram. Before too long, it’s time to go to bed. Angela lays there in the dark, hearing Amanda’s soft breathing, the gentle way she shifts as if she doesn’t want to disturb Angela.
It’s Amanda’s rhythmic breathing that lulls Angela to sleep. She sleeps and it’s sometime in the night, the sky and room are still dark when Angela wakes. She isn’t sure what has woken her up, but she’s awake, and she’s more than ready to go back to sleep except she realizes that her face is warm. Her face is warm because her cheek is against Amanda’s back.
Angela should move away. She should get back on her own side of the hotel bed. She doesn’t even know how she wound up pressed against Amanda, with her arm looped loosely around Amanda’s waist. It’s hazy, warm, and comfortable. She’s pressed almost completely against Amanda with Angela’s front to Amanda’s back.
As Angela breathes, Amanda’s hair that’s fanned around her face shifts and tickles her cheek. Angela can smell the sweet shampoo and lingering perfume that Amanda uses. She wants to sink into the scent, wants to stay right here. She can’t stop herself from squeezing Amanda around the middle.
Amanda hums sleepily.
Angela aches for this to be real, for Amanda to be hers, to always fall asleep this way, wrapped around Amanda, warm and close, burying her face in Amanda’s hair and hearing all those small and sleepy sounds from the other woman.
It’s not her life though and none of this belongs to her. It’s creepy that she’s even holding Amanda the way she is now. If Amanda were awake and Amanda knew, surely…she wouldn’t want it, would she? Or she’d be weirded out? Amanda is touchy but this is beyond even that in Angela’s mind.
Angela sighs softly, feeling Amanda’s hair ruffle with her breath.
It takes all that Angela has to force herself to release Amanda, to force herself to turn away, rolling on her side and inching away so that she and Amanda are no longer touching. The hotel bed is much colder now and Angela feels lonely even though Amanda is in the same bed as her.
#amangela#ianthony#shourtney#smosh rpf#smosh fanfiction#smosh fan fic#smosh fic#my writing#850 follower milestone prompts#pining#angst#i'm leaving it a little ambiguous sorry anon#one bed trope#queue and i
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Okay I waited to get this out there because I didn't want to be a bummer the second it released, but. The story in Shadow Generations was... kind of nothing. Which sucks, because it had literally everything going for it.
Shadow gets plunged into a white space where people and places from different points in time are unceremoniously dropped in due to the power of the Time Eater, and that means Black Doom is here to try to manipulate Shadow again. Shadow starts developing alien mutations that mess with his sense of identity and only make Black Doom stronger, but he's determined to use them to take him out for good.
At the same time, Maria and Gerald Robotnik are here, and of course the first thought on Shadow's mind when he discovers them is how he can find a way to save them from their original fates. So he's got two goals: defeat Black Doom, and save his family.
This setup is really good. It's immediately engaging for all sorts of reasons, from the surface-level "whoa cool alien powers!!" to the heartbreaking implications of Shadow being forced to say goodbye to Maria and Gerald again. (Because naturally, we've seen where the games go from here and we know the timeline isn't changed that drastically.)
And it's clear to see that the people involved in working on this game were passionate about it, too. The animation and cinematography is quite good, and while I have my critiques (I still don't think the character models are that great), so much effort was put into making Shadow the coolest guy ever, and I think it paid off. He's both very cool and shows a wider range of emotions than we've seen from him in a while, which is always a plus for me.
I mean, goodness knows that Shadow needed his character to be revisited and given respect after, what, over ten years? The step up that this is can't be overstated.
And yet.
The story itself is so empty.
Let's go in order:
The game opens with a narrated recap of Shadow's basic history in order to catch people up. I can't say it doesn't technically serve its purpose, but given the fact that the premise of the game is exploring Shadow's past, it's a little weird to spell it out at the start like this. If you're a newcomer to the series and don't know much about Shadow, wouldn't it be cooler to find this stuff out by progressing in the game?
It also leaves out crucial details that, while they could arguably bloat the scene, provide a lot of relevant context that a first-time viewer isn't privy to.
"At the last moment, Shadow remembered Maria's final wish... to protect her beloved planet and all who lived there."
The last moment of... what, exactly? What made him remember, what made him forget in the first place?
In order, these are the answers the scene doesn't give you:
The last moments before the ARK crashed into the Earth, which would've caused catastrophic damage.
Amy was the one who pleaded with Shadow to give everyone a chance, which echoed what Maria told him, triggering the full memory.
It's actually unclear if Shadow forgot what Maria said as a natural trauma response or because Gerald messed with his memories on purpose, but this would have been a great opportunity to clarify.
It also leaves out the fact that Shadow teamed up with Sonic to save the world after he tried to destroy it, so that's two connections with other characters he has that are completely left out in the recap. I know we're finally getting back to showcasing Rouge and Omega as his best friends, but he does hold respect for Sonic and Amy, too. Plus, his interactions with them in SA2 were so iconic, why leave them out?
Then again, I suppose Rouge and Omega aren't in this recap either... which is really weird, the more I think about it.
But even as it's describing the moment he chooses to be a hero, they don't show him in his super form alongside Sonic, he's just... what, on fire?? I don't know what that's supposed to be depicting, it just looks cool.
"Shadow didn't understand why Black Doom expected him to be the vanguard for his invasion of Earth."
A fine start, but shouldn't we have gotten a passing mention of Shadow's amnesia somewhere in here? He spent two whole games trying to remember who he was, and Black Doom's whole tactic was to exploit his desire for answers. That's important characterization for both Shadow and Black Doom that we're missing out on, here.
"Shadow the Hedgehog. The lone, dark warrior who judges the world by his own code."
This is maybe best addressed in a separate post, but. does anyone else find this description of Shadow kinda odd? "Lone warrior" I get, even with his friends he's not big on groups, but it's everything else.
Yeah, he judges the world by his own code, I guess, but his actions are all in service of following Maria's code. It's Sonic that lives solely by what he wants without much influence from others, not Shadow.
And what exactly makes Shadow a "dark" warrior? He's been explicitly characterized as someone who doesn't kill as recently as the prologue animation to this very game, where he goes out of his way to save a pilot when he doesn't need to. His entire life's purpose is protecting the world, and this doesn't involve killing or torturing people, so... what exactly is the dark part of his morality. Nothing about this recap has given me reason to believe he's anything but a heroic person with a traumatic past, and the subsequent game will only reinforce that.
I guess he did kill all the Black Arms, but that's not something the game ever treated as an immoral action. Shadow blows up Black Doom and the comet his people live on and all of our heroes cheer as he does it. It happens in the True Ending and everything, where Shadow's supposed to be proving himself as a hero for real, so that can't be the example of him being a Dark Warrior.
Is it because of how he treated Infinite, a character that this game doesn't acknowledge despite featuring a level from Forces? We'll never know. They just want you to accept the idea that he's Darker and Edgier than Sonic based on his surface-level demeanor alone, which... given that the objective of this game is to showcase Shadow's nuance, this is really out of place. Overall, not a great scene.
That said, the first real cutscene is pretty good, and it immediately showcases how unnecessary that recap was by showing how excited Maria was to meet Shadow for the first time. From that scene, we learn that Shadow was artificially made, that he's "the Ultimate Lifeform," that Maria was likely close to him, that this happened on some place called "the ARK" which is in space, etc. Why did we have a narrator tell us all of this a minute ago when we were just about to see it for ourselves?
I do have one nitpick, though - Shadow claims that he arrived at the ARK "an hour ago," and Rouge on the other end of the comm is already at Sonic's birthday party. Rouge only agreed to help Shadow get to the ARK if he would go to Sonic's birthday party afterwards, but how was Shadow supposed to have time to do anything up there if Sonic's party was that soon? I was under the impression from watching the prologue that Sonic's birthday was at least a week away, because how else would Rouge expect him to conduct a full investigation and potentially fight some huge battle before then?
Oh and the Time Eater shows up in two places at once (at Sonic's party and on the ARK), I feel like it would've made more sense to have it grab Shadow after it was done with everyone else. Now I'm gonna be forced to ask "why doesn't the Time Eater multiply" for the rest of the game. Whatever
Moving on, our first real sign of things to come is the fact that Omega does not have a proper speaking role despite showing up in the first cutscene. He's right there, conveniently next to Shadow, but as soon as you think they're going to talk to each other... you're dropped into the hub world. Speaking to Omega results in text bubble dialogue, wherein Shadow is mysteriously hit with Silent Protagonist Disease and we don't get to hear anything he says. Effectively, Omega just. talks at Shadow three times, saying nothing of interest. and it's completely optional.
I repeat: all of the dialogue from one of Shadow's best friends is OPTIONAL, and Shadow himself says nothing to him. Yeah, we're off to a great start.
(Omega even says that he's going to assist Shadow, and I just. I have to laugh. I'm so sorry Omega but in terms of physical actions, you're genuinely going to do less here than in Forces)
Shadow: "No. She's gone. I'm seeing things."
Pardon?? Seeing things??? I'm sorry but there is no way that Shadow can see and recognize Maria from that distance but not from ten feet away with her back turned. He's also never been implied to have super-vision, so the whole scene just doesn't make sense, and frankly adds nothing to the story.
Even if he doesn't mean literal sight, then 1) why did he phrase it like that, and 2) I kinda don't care. He doesn't need to be able to sense Maria's presence or whatever's going on here, because he's just as shocked when he actually sees Maria properly later. It builds suspense I suppose, but I feel like it would've been more impactful to discover that Maria was really here the same way Shadow does; in the cutscene where he saves her.
But before they can reunite, we've got the first proper cutscene with Black Doom:
Black Doom: "You defeated us, but the Black Arms live on. And this temporal anomaly has accelerated my plans to revive my forces and consume the world."
I'm gonna be real with you guys. I have no idea what he's talking about here.
The game makes zero attempt to really explain how the Black Arms "live on" despite Shadow blowing up their entire comet along with Black Doom himself, and going into the game, I kinda thought it was just... time displacement. Maria and Gerald are brought in from a time they were alive, so I thought it would be the same with Black Doom, but no - he revived himself before the Time Eater even got involved.
Which I'd be willing to accept if they gave me an explanation for it, but they didn't, and the whole foundation of the plot suffers for it.
Plus, what the heck does he mean that the temporal anomaly has "accelerated his plans to revive his forces"?? The Time Eater's powers don't... accelerate anything. At all. They pluck things out of time and freeze them in a void. How does that help Black Doom's plans whatsoever?
If the idea is that he's going to pluck his own forces out of time and bring them back that way, why not just say that? Why are they withholding such basic information from us? It doesn't create intrigue, and the story doesn't even treat it like there's a gap in our knowledge to begin with. I think it's genuinely supposed to be the whole explanation, and that's a problem because it explains very little.
Then you've got the Black Moon, and this thing annoys me to no end because guess what?? Despite gradually opening more eyes and cracking open every time you complete a level, it's never once explained what it is or what it's for. All it does is turn the white void into a red void and open a portal to Even More Radical Highway. Maybe I'm forgetting something from an optional piece of dialogue, but that only creates a different problem, which is that you should never lock basic understanding of the story behind optional dialogue.
Why does it have eyes? Is it a living creature or some weird bioweapon? It's oddly mechanical for a creation of the Black Arms; even their weaponry is organic, as this very game tells us through Omega, so what's its deal??
You'd think it would have something to do with time, considering the framing of this scene:
Shadow says "perhaps I can change their fate" and then looks to the Black Moon as though it may hold some relevance to this new plot thread, but. nope. it just takes you back to Radical Highway.
And hey, look at that, I was so busy complaining about the moon that I seamlessly transitioned into one of my biggest issues with the game: Shadow says this. and never follows up on it. EVER.
I'm not kidding, there's literally NO point in the game where we're shown Shadow trying to do ANYTHING to change Maria and Gerald's fates. There's no scene where he attempts to understand the void better, he never investigates anything, he makes exactly zero attempts to accomplish one of his main goals. of BRINGING HIS FAMILY BACK TO LIFE.
What is the point of them being here, then.
No, I'm serious, literally why are they here if we don't get to see Shadow try to save them?? By the time the final cutscene rolls around, they start fading away back to their own time, and suddenly Shadow's like
(WHY ARE YOU SURPRISED, YOU DID NOTHING TO PREVENT THIS OUTCOME)
But I'll talk more about Maria and Gerald later - for now, since we're on the topic of Shadow having odd reactions to things, how about those stages and bosses, huh?
Well guys, I'm pleased to announce that despite there being dialogue in some of the stages, absolutely none of it provides context to the locations Shadow visits or his thoughts on them! If you didn't play Heroes and have no idea that Bullet Station is where Shadow found a destroyed Shadow Android, kickstarting a new layer to his identity crisis, then congratulations, this choice of level will mean nothing to you.
And before anyone tries to be like "the Sonic Generations levels don't get commentary from Sonic on their significance to him, either," it's a problem there, too. But it's an even bigger problem here, because they went out of their way to choose levels that have real emotional significance to Shadow and then proceeded to do nothing with it.
Isn't this the game where we revisit Shadow's story up until this point? Would it have been so hard to drop a line of dialogue indicating that Shadow's not thrilled about returning to Bullet Station? Maybe add a brief cutscene where he finds the same broken android from before, and says something like "hmph, I can't believe I let that thing make me doubt myself for so long," thus demonstrating his growth?
Here's a fun fact: Shadow has zero cutscenes that happen inside of levels. This is something Sonic beats him at, by having one cutscene that takes place in a level (Chemical Plant). This should not have been a high bar to clear, but they fell short somehow, anyway.
(Space Colony ARK doesn't even use the Final Chase music. The Shadow game starts out with a song exclusive to Sonic rather than him. He actually has more ARK-related music than Sonic does and they still didn't use any of them. How did they mess that up)
This problem only gets worse when they start pulling in levels from Forces and Frontiers - games that this Shadow hasn't experienced yet and wasn't there for, respectively. Once again, on principle, this is a cool idea! Shadow getting a peek into what his and Sonic's futures have in store? The confusion over when these events take place, if they're even connected to him like the others have been? Great stuff
And hey, if he's going to Chaos Island, and we saw from the trailers that the volcano is exploding in Act 1, then maybe we could even see Super Sonic fighting Knight in the background in Act 2! The debris from their fight could even act as platforming challenges, can you imagine how cool that would be? What will Shadow think of the advanced tech on the island, or of seeing Sonic fight something so massive? Surely this is a great opportunity to elevate Frontiers even further--yeah of course they don't do that.
No Knight fight in the background, which is... fair enough, I guess, but then why bother with the volcano exploding? It only does that moments away from when Sonic is about to fight Knight. Yeah, it looks cool, but we didn't need it. The more egregious problem is still the fact that Shadow has no observable thoughts or opinions on being sent to unfamiliar terrain in the future, though.
The bosses all have dialogue, though, which is a step up on a technicality and little else. Most of the dialogue from Shadow is just him being a self-aggrandizing badass who doesn't see any of the bosses as threats - even Neo Metal Sonic, who he should really not be so confident in beating all by himself, considering that he. didn't do that before. It actually took eleven other people to defeat Neo Metal, including Super Sonic, but I guess he just doesn't care at this point.
If they wanted to, it would've been easy to make him overconfident on purpose due to his new Doom powers, make an arc out of it, but no. Shadow's just Like This now, apparently.
There's a similar power scaling issue in Sonic Generations too, where Sonic can somehow defeat Perfect Chaos without his super form, but the game had dropped location-specific cutscenes so long ago that it was hard to feel like it was even canon at a certain point. The game never cared about making sense or really being anything, but Shadow Generations doesn't get that excuse. The bosses having the most mid-gameplay dialogue tells us that they're Definitely Happening, and so I care more about them as a result.
Which takes us to the moment that I truly realized that this game had no interest in doing anything with its material: the Mephiles boss fight.
Shadow: "What's this? A seal of some sort?"
Okay real quick before I get into my big issues with this fight: I know it's a magic glowing artifact, but what about it actually looks like a seal, specifically? Does Shadow just have a sense for this kind of thing? I don't recall him ever demonstrating that ability before.
I feel like this line is just here to clarify what it is for people who don't know, but since Shadow also doesn't know, it's just kind of weird. I'm not even sure why he's in the Scepter to begin with, considering that Shadow's sealing attempt in this room was a failure, but whatever.
Of the three bosses in Shadow Generations that precede the final boss, Mephiles is the only one that can both speak and had a relevant dynamic with Shadow that would be interesting to revisit. The Biolizard is cool but doesn't have a personality, and Neo Metal had no real opinion on Shadow. (In Rivals 2, Shadow and Metal Sonic have a developing friendship, but this has unfortunately never been brought up again. If they did so here, it would only have been on Shadow's end, since Metal hadn't gotten to that point yet.)
But Mephiles? So much of his character revolves around Shadow. It was Shadow who sealed him away originally, and it was Shadow's form that he took when he broke free. He's the main antagonist of Shadow's story in 06, and even though his primary goal is rejoining with Iblis, he takes a vested interest in trying to manipulate Shadow over to his side by showing him the worst of what humans will do to him - not unlike Black Doom, honestly, though he was focused on Shadow's past instead.
Plus, it's been so long! We thought we would never get to see Mephiles again! What have you got for us, game?
Mephiles: "I will defeat you, then restore myself to the timeline." Shadow: "I don't know what you're talking about, but I will crush you all the same." Mephiles: "What? Did you forget about me AGAIN?"
*deep sigh*
Contradictory dialogue back-to-back. I see. Cool.
Mephiles should not be surprised that Shadow doesn't remember who he is, because he literally JUST SAID that his goal is to restore himself to the timeline. He KNOWS that he never existed, and therefore SHOULD KNOW that nobody he encounters will remember him. I'm convinced that he only reacted this way because the writers thought it would be funny, and that's it.
Even if it made sense, though, Mephiles isn't supposed to be funny. He's supposed to be ominous and threatening. For as much care that went into recreating this environment and his powers/body language from 06 (and I gotta say, this whole section looks extremely nice), none of that same care really seemed to go into his personality. He's just as drab as Neo Metal, occasionally repeating lines from 06 so that you know they played it and not much else.
The end of the fight features some absolutely unhinged dialogue from Shadow for no reason, though.
Mephiles: "No... I want... to exist...! Shadow: "There is no future for you. Ever."
Look, I get it, they've done nothing but fight this whole time . But Shadow has no personal beef with this guy. Even if they're going with the idea that Shadow wouldn't care to learn what Mephiles is rambling on about (kind of boring, and why wouldn't he be curious about why someone like this has it out for him), there's no reason to go so far as to say he'll never have a future. Is this the "dark" part of that "dark warrior" thing they were talking about in the beginning?? Kind of a random place for it to jump out of him, if so.
The kind of intensity coming from Shadow here would be justified if he remembered who Mephiles was, but he doesn't. As it stands, it gives off the impression that he didn't actually process a single thing Mephiles said about wanting to exist and restore himself to the timeline, and just said the first cool, edgy retort that came to mind. Which makes the sentence both less cool and even more out of character.
After this boss finished playing out, all I could feel was disappointment and a creeping sense of emptiness. If this was how the game was handling Mephiles, of all characters, if this was the extent of what they were willing to do with an idea... the rest of the game suddenly seemed much less exciting. I got to this point, realized how comparatively little of the game was left, and thought oh no.
Now, uh... where was I in the story, again?
Oh right, Shadow was about to go save Maria. I actually have no notes on that scene, it's pretty good and I liked that Maria was immediately thrown off by his aggressive fighting style and whatnot. It implies a lot about what Shadow used to be like without really showing or telling us, and that's pretty neat.
The following cutscene where Gerald explains how Shadow's growing powers only make Black Doom stronger in the process is also fine, there's nothing super specific for me to gripe about it in isolation.
And this good streak it has going is immediately interrupted by the worst, most nonsensical scene in the entire game.
Sonic: "I found you, Shadow!" Shadow: "The blue hedgehog... of all places..." Sonic: "You have something I need." Shadow: "You can wait until my business is finished." Sonic: "Yea sorry, but that Chaos Emerald and I have a date with a monster!" Shadow: "Well then, it'll be a date to die for."
This is. a really stilted conversation, no matter what way you look at it. On one hand, it's repurposed dialogue from two different scenes haphazardly mashed together, neither of which should represent their current dynamic anymore since they were both antagonistic at the time. And on the other, it just... completely lacks character from both of them. They're so unbelievably dry despite their attempts to sound quirky, it's actually impressive.
I have to ask - have the script writers not heard the incessant complaints from fans about there being too many references in modern Sonic dialogue?? Because this scene plays out like an actual parody of that trend, the kind I would expect to see on twitter or something. I initially saw the animation for this cutscene without audio due to leaks, and I thought it looked pretty cool because the animation was nicely done.
Boy, when I tell you I was stunned to discover that THIS was the actual, official dialogue. What happened here?? Why is this what Sonic cutscenes are turning into?? In a game that costs $50-$60??And people are saying it's the best Sonic game???
Somehow, the god-awful dialogue isn't even the only thing that's wrong with this scene, but I'll compile the rest in bullet points to speed it up a little.
Shadow suddenly shows up in Sonic's section of White Space, despite it not being visible from a distance and therefore giving no reason for Shadow to venture out that far
Sonic says he "found" Shadow as if he was looking for him, even though the only people Sonic has seen here other than his and Tails' past selves are people who were at his birthday party
Classic Sonic is neither seen nor mentioned despite the extremely fun potential of having him interact with Shadow
A purple portal conveniently shows up in front of Sonic and Shadow while they're talking for no reason
The boss fight with Sonic is just a cutscene (lame), and Shadow gets taken out completely by one solid bonk from Sonic (even lamer)
The fake Chaos Emerald switcheroo, while clever, is presented as if it was done deliberately when it was clearly a coincidence that it got knocked out of Shadow instead of the real one
(I guess this technically happens before the Mephiles fight so my faith in this game was already plummeting, but I was willing to tolerate this scene being bad because I could understand them not wanting to add too much to Sonic's side of things. They had completely free reign with Mephiles and still delivered nothing, which is why it really cemented itself in my head)
The one thing I really liked here was seeing Shadow almost use his Doom powers to defeat Sonic, deciding against it, and his hesitation being what lost him the match. Shadow refusing to fight Sonic on unequal terms is some really good characterization that I was happy to see.
Black Doom: "The promised time is nigh upon us, Shadow. Soon, you will be mine."
So did we ever learn what the "promised time" was, exactly? I've played every route of Shadow the Hedgehog (some more than once) and still can't remember. If he's referring to the time when Shadow awakens his full power then I guess it makes sense, but otherwise it's kind of an oxymoron considering that time doesn't exist in White Space.
Gerald: "He has grown a new body, and used the nebulous nature of time in White Space to accelerate his plans for revenge."
Shadow, buddy, your animation is positively kickin' right now but Gerald, I'm gonna need you to do literally anything other than just repeat the same lackluster explanation we got earlier as if that's going to make it any less confusing. What ABOUT the nebulous nature of time? Is time not largely just frozen here?? We're somehow around 3/4s into this story and I still have NO idea how anything works
Maria calms Shadow down from his frankly justified anger by holding his hand and talking about how she doesn't want him to be driven by darkness. They find a way to throw in the fact that apparently Maria named him "Shadow" because the presence of a shadow can show you where to find the light, and it's... nice? Very wholesome, but it feels awkwardly placed and I'm not sure anyone was seriously asking why he was named that. Like, of all the questions to spend this game's limited screentime answering, "why is he named Shadow" was probably not at the top of most people's lists.
And before you have a chance to think about it, we're already at the endgame.
Shadow: "I'm letting go of that destructive anger."
Wow, and in the very next scene after it was brought to your attention, too! You sure do grow fast, Shadow!
Okay, all jokes aside, there's not much I can say about the pacing in this game other than It's Rushed and Bad, but I think it's finally time to talk about Gerald and Maria.
Gerald first: He's mostly just here to give out exposition. His relationship with Shadow is much less focused on than Maria's, which I find to be really frustrating because I always had a lot of questions about how those two interacted. In SA2, we only know him as a grieving, hate-filled man who was heavily implied to have scientifically messed with Shadow's mind - not long after they had both just lost Maria - in order to make him inclined towards Gerald's revenge plan.
In Shadow's first game, we see a side to him from before then, when he really seemed to care for Shadow and we got some clarity on the purpose of the Eclipse Cannon and whatnot. But what were their average interactions like? Who was in charge of Shadow's training? If it was Gerald, did that ever create a sense of distance between them? Shadow never has warm, nostalgic flashbacks of him, so I assumed their relationship either wasn't as close or he has too many conflicting feelings now for those memories to be very comforting.
This game decides to lean into Gerald being a kind, supportive man, but regardless, Shadow's feelings should be a lot more complicated, no?
I'd imagine that, in a way, it's a relief to have this Gerald around again. It would make it easier to pretend that the man who used him in an attempt to destroy the world and go against everything Maria stood for was just... a fluke, or something.
But still, Shadow knows that he would do bad things to him if Maria died. It's already happened.
Dark Beginnings also suggested that either Shadow was there when he shot down by the firing squad (unlikely given the context), or he watched the recording that played at the end of SA2 enough to be able to see it in his dreams. Neither of those are good for his psyche, and would only add to the number of emotions he has to suppress whenever they interact. There is, of course, none of this nuance within the game itself, despite it being right there and ready to be worked with.
Then you've got Maria, and. hoo boy.
I take no real issue with any of Maria's traits that are on display. Her being a nice girl with boundless energy and goodwill does not make her boring, and I've always been fascinated by her character. So, I need you guys to understand that it's with a heavy heart that I must say that Maria is... barely a character in this game.
And like, she doesn't exactly have a history of being deep or complex. But we've also only ever seen her in Shadow's memories up until this point, and that means this game was a unique opportunity to flesh her out more.
When a character is as idealized by another as Maria is by Shadow, and we only see them through that lens, it's natural to assume that the depiction isn't completely accurate. I was never in doubt that Maria was kind and gentle, or that she was always there to help Shadow when she knew he was struggling, but I always wanted to know what she was like outside of that. What makes her angry? What was she like on a bad day, when she inevitably got frustrated at her lot in life? How did Shadow comfort her? What was her sense of humor like?
While we technically learn more things about Maria in this game, there's never a point where she acts differently from Shadow's vision of her. She's not really shown to have flaws, and she's only really there to be saved and offer emotional support. It's like... a textbook example of what you shouldn't be doing when writing a female character, having her be defined entirely by her relationship with the male lead and never speaking up or complaining about her own problems or feelings. They don't even make a point out of it, that Maria tempers herself to be "perfect" for other people or anything like that.
Why don't we get to see how she and Shadow would handle an argument or something like that? Especially this Shadow, who's all shaken up by everything? Wouldn't it be beneficial for both of their characters for Maria to be seen as herself, the way she was in life, rather than just the nicest moments she and Shadow had together?
I'm gonna make a comparison here that people aren't gonna like, but... I think Elise is honestly shown to be a more nuanced character than Maria is. And this is coming from someone who thinks that she was also mishandled in her game.
Similar to Maria, Elise is genuinely a deeply caring person, and lives mostly isolated with a condition of sorts that makes her life difficult. Her most important relationship is also with the male lead of her respective game, but she doesn't exist solely for his benefit. (Amusingly, Sonic actually seems to be there primarily to further her arc, so it's a bit of a role swap there.)
But we see more from Elise than just Being Nice all the time. We see her being resolute and bold in the face of danger, or disappointed when she has to go back to the castle. We watch her try her hardest not to cry and retain her strong, regal exterior when faced with overwhelming emotion.
We get to see her open up and laugh and become more confident, we watch as someone who's been forced to put her feelings aside for the convenience (and safety) of others her whole life finally break down and shout something selfish for once. And then we watch her ultimately choose to do the right thing, anyway. Her strength of character is shown to us by putting her in situations that challenge her, and the narrative never once shames her for being imperfect; it's actually encouraging her to be her real, flawed self.
Why does Maria not get this same treatment? Why don't we get cutscenes of her being excited about the new environment she's in, or frustrated that her symptoms are making it difficult to do anything here? When does she get to be selfish? Why can't she get upset at people treating her like she's frail, even if it technically "makes sense" for them to do so?
We're told, in Gerald's journal, that some of the people aboard the ARK doubted that Maria was really sick due to her symptoms not being clearly visible. Because it's his journal, we only get to hear his feelings on the matter, but in the full game, we never once get to know how it makes Maria feel, the person this is all about to begin with. They absolutely could have incorporated this into a cutscene somewhere, but they didn't.
Once again, I have to ask: what is the point of Maria and Gerald being in this game if this was how they were going to be written? Not only does Shadow fail to even attempt to save their lives, he doesn't even walk away from the experience with renewed understanding of who they were as people.
So what even happens in this story, then?? Every single aspect of it is dragged down constantly by the game's refusal to do anything with what it has:
Shadow revisits places from his past, but has nothing to say about them
Shadow visits places from the future, but has nothing to say about them
He has nothing relevant or interesting to say about any of the bosses
Mephiles trying to restore himself to the timeline is a plot point that exists solely within his boss fight and nowhere else
He doesn't struggle with any of the bosses, emotionally or physically, turning them into a boring power trip
He barely struggles with his Doom powers, the things that are supposed to be giving him an identity crisis
Sonic is not a playable boss fight and he also says nothing relevant or interesting
Classic Sonic doesn't even get a passing mention
The Team Dark friendship is supposed to be a highlight but Shadow never speaks to Omega, who also never shows up in cutscenes, and Rouge is just kinda there
Maria and Gerald never meet Rouge and Omega, or anybody else on-screen, despite it being extremely easy for them to run into each other
Shadow's relationships with Maria and Gerald are barely explored past their surface
Most importantly, Shadow is never shown making any sort of effort to save Maria and Gerald from their fates, despite it being one of his primary goals
...Oh yeah, I forgot to complain about how Shadow barely struggles with his Doom powers. I was gonna go on a whole spiel about how it would've been super easy to make into an arc and how it was wildly underutilized despite being a major selling point of the game, and the only real consistent conflict whenever Black Doom isn't on screen.
Well. Anyway. Once the White Space becomes Red Space (something that once again makes me question how far away Sonic's area is, to not be able to see this happening), Shadow magically gets over his "destructive anger" and goes to Radical Highway one last time for the epic final boss.
And it certainly is epic, I can't deny that. A massive technical improvement over the first fight against Devil Doom, and I'm not about to sit here and act like the wings aren't cool. But I can't say it feels very rewarding, since I never really understood what was going on and Shadow didn't really struggle that much to get to this point. Not to mention, he's still acting all high and mighty during boss fights, which makes it feel stale really quickly. Black Doom isn't really that interesting by himself, so Shadow kinda needed to carry that fight, but no, it's just more of the same.
One last point before I wrap this up:
Where was Emerl???
Correct me if I'm wrong, but a promo animation for a game should, in theory, provide you some idea as to what kind of things to expect in the game itself. While a lot of them take their share of creative liberties, I don't think they're in the habit of putting spotlight on entire characters who never appear in the game at all.
This is THE GAME where we bring back the people from Shadow's past that he's lost, and Emerl most certainly qualifies. He's from the more recent past, yes, but Shadow still cared about him and absolutely would have been affected by his death. There's no way that, had he been in the story, Shadow wouldn't have been determined to save him as well. But no, he's just there to be a cool lore detail in Gerald's journal.
Which means this is yet another depiction of Emerl where we refuse to acknowledge his personality. Do they seriously think Emerl is more interesting as an emotionless killing machine that Gerald researched in his spare time? Where's the fun-loving kid who mimicked everyone around him, splicing things he heard them say together to communicate and creating funny tonal whiplash? Where's the robot with the soul that Gerald gave him, that was nurtured by Sonic and his friends?
Not in this game, apparently! They went out of their way to canonize Battle and still managed to treat it with zero respect. Kind of impressive, really, and just another footnote in the trend of this game not actually caring to do anything with Shadow's past.
There are definitely moments in this game that I like, but that's kind of all they are: moments. The game's total cutscene runtime is around 30 minutes, and that means there's not enough time in any of them to get anything done. A scene that's good in isolation is tainted by the fact that it's all there is.
And it's just... so baffling to me. There are so, so many points in this game where you could have fit additional cutscenes in. We could have had one after each act, or at least after each level. Give us more cutscenes after activating things in the hub world or something. I mean, a game that claims to be this story-driven doesn't usually need an excuse to throw cutscenes at you, and they certainly didn't need to force each scene to be so unbelievably short.
If they really needed to downsize on cutscene length for some reason, then maybe they should have just made a less ambitious story. The game wants to do so many things at once, but it doesn't have the time to do any of those things justice. We could have gotten a short, sweet, well-done little story, but instead we get a story that easily needed at least two hours to tell crunched into a measly 30 minutes.
I mean, Dark Beginnings in its entirety is half the length of the full game. Think about that for a second.
This game's story was supposed to be something, man. It's getting so much praise for what feels to me like the bare bones structure of a story, and it's frustrating because I know this series can do better. The writer of this game can do better, and I know that because I've read his other Sonic material and it feels much more complete than this does.
I was genuinely looking forward to this game, is the thing. I really didn't think it would be this lackluster, because like I said at the beginning of this post, it had everything in the world going for it. But no matter how nice it feels to have a Shadow who isn't wildly out of character for once, that alone can't carry an entire story.
Shadow Generations is a mess of good ideas executed in the least interesting, most nothing way possible. Its only real saving grace is its animation, and the fact that Shadow generally feels like himself.
Except for when he's talking to Sonic. What the heck happened when he was talking to Sonic
#sonic the hedgehog#shadow the hedgehog#sonic x shadow generations#sonic x shadow generations spoilers#sxsh generations#sxsh spoilers#sxsh generations spoilers#analysis#meta#This uh. might be my longest post ever??#I didn't go into this planning for it to be 7000 words but I just kept finding new things to ramble about#And of course I just wanna say that this post is NOT here to tell people that they can't like the game's story#I just needed to air out all of my issues with it because I felt like I was going insane
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i've been thinking about this one again a LOT so:
Eddie never said anything about the letters.
Not that Wayne wanted him to, just a fact of the matter.
And consequently, Wayne forgot about them until about five years later.
He's older now, so's Eddie. Along with the added years of experience came the fame. The billboards, the charts, the money, all that good stuff.
His nephew, no, his son was thriving, loving every minute. One album under his belt and another on it's way.
The final show of this tour wound up in Indianapolis, so Wayne made the trek north to see Eddie for the first time in about three years at that point, getting ushered back stage as soon as his ticket was scanned ("You ain't payin' for shit, boy. Lemme support you how I can.").
"Right through here, Mr. Munson." The stagehand gestures him forward through a door and he's immediately accosted by a flying head of curls.
"Jesus Christ Ed, I ain't as spry as a use'ta be!" he complains, grabbing the kid up in a hug.
"I know," he says over Wayne's shoulder, "Jeff only just convinced me not to jump."
"And for that, I thank 'im." Wayne lets him go, looking around the room. "Nice place y'got here. A bit small, but it's nice."
Eddie rolls his eyes, "Ha Ha Ha."
They spend a good half hour catching up on things, then, after the same stagehand gives them the "Five minutes Mr. Munson." warning, Wayne finds himself in the wings in front of an absolutely jam-packed stadium.
Now he loves his nephew, don't get him wrong, but his music was never much Wayne's speed. Charlie Daniels, Dolly, Clarence Clearwater? absolutely. Eddie's deafening guitar and pyrotechnics? ... well, he loves the kid...
All this to say that even knowing how well Eddie's done for himself now, how well his album sold, how many people are here, it surprises the hell outta him when the entirety of the sold out show screams for an encore Eddie says "isn't like anything you just heard, but it's pretty important to me if you care to stay."
Jeff comes off the stage, gestures for Wayne to take off his construction-grade noise cancelling headphones, and says "You'll wanna hear this one."
Wayne shrugs, passes the headphones to the first person that reaches for them, then turns his attention back to the stage as Eddie gets comfortable on a stool without his beloved sweetheart.
"Yeah, I know right? Far cry from my baby, huh?" he laughs, showing off the acoustic in his arms to the whole place.
It's only when he shows the thing to Wayne's side of the throng that he can see the flash of white on the black face.
It's his acoustic. His as in Wayne's before, his as in it's Eddie's now, the one that's had 'This machine slays dragons' scrawled onto it for a couple decades now at this point.
Wayne's heart swells at the sight.
"Now, like I said, this is nowhere near the show you came for, but I've got a special someone here tonight and this song is for them." Teasing oohs and wolf whistles sound across the crowd as Eddie nods, "Mmhm, mhmm, that's correct, my Uncle's here tonight."
The gathered masses howl with laughter at that and Wayne can't help but join in.
"So, to preface this, I left home with a stick up my ass about how no one understood me in my tiny hometown, not that far from here, actually, and my dear Uncle Wayne just nodded at me, let me bitch and complain, and said 'See ya.'."
More laughter echoes up at him.
"Come to find out, he'd been saving me money for years before that, for just such an occasion. Do you wanna know when I found this out?" he nods sagely at the noisy response, "Yep, correct, I found out a month ago when I finally went through that one box that'd been haunting the back of my closet."
Eddie looks back to where Wayne is standing out of sight, "You couldn't have said something? There was a whole grand in that envelope!"
He grins as the crowd jeers and playfully boos along with Eddie, then just shrugs at his nephew.
Eddie rolls his head around as he turns back to the crowd. "Anyway, Wayne, this one's for you."
To say the song was not at all what Wayne expected would be an understatement. The one of the century.
He expected a few alternating chords and more jokes on his behalf that he'd have to rib Eddie for later or something of the sort.
No chance in hell he'd ever expect this.
Nor did he think he'd get all misty-eyed.
Wayne recognizes some of the things he'd written into the letters, some things he's sure he'd told Eddie in the first couple years of him living with him...
When the song is over, the people there for his nephew cheer sky high for him. Chant Wayne's name until he makes his appearance, striding out under the lights to hug his son in front of everyone else who loves him.
(and then eddie sends him all the copies of the magazines and papers the picture of them hugging on stage in front of thousands gets printed in. the one that makes it into a frame and onto the wall, however, is a clipping that says Eddie Munson plays heartfelt ballad for his Uncle, Wayne Munson, who (according to one fan present at the show) "looks exactly like I thought he would.".)
more munsons | my ko-fi | my other works
you're gonna go far
eddie & wayne picture fic based on this post
(long post ahead, but bear with me)
4/10/1984 Eddie, I’m starting this letter after you came home with the letter from the school saying you’re not graduating this year. I could tell you didn’t believe me when I told you it’ll be alright, that it’ll all work out in the end. That it did for me when I had the same talk with my pa.. but you eventually stepped back from the edge, I think, you’re in your room now. There was something else there too, which is really why I'm writing this now. You have the same look in your eye that I saw in my own reflection long before I got drafted, the look I saw in your dad’s when Lizzie told us she was pregnant. You’re already planning your escape. And I won’t hold it against you when you do kick rocks, I just pray you give me a little warning so I can say goodbye. And I ain’t a praying man. I’m tucking away some cash with this for when you go. Don’t have much, but I have you. And I wanna make sure you have the best start you possibly can.
10/11/1984 It’s been rough for you again. Working at Merrill’s has been good for you. Getting fresh air, sunshine, shit, even your gangly noodles you call arms are looking less noodley. But they just sent you home early today.. something wrong with the crop and they won’t need the extra hands this season. That, starting school again, even Ronnie leaving last week.. I know you two kids were close. You ain’t even getting all excited for halloween! Adding some more cash for you, little more than I could last time. Just hang in there kiddo.
6/5/1985 I think you think you don’t know, and I’m willing to let you pretend for a little while longer, but shit, Eddie, you think I wouldn’t know when graduation was supposed to be just because you weren’t the one to tell me? You know I won’t be mad at you. If you don’t say anything for another week, I will. 6/7/1985 - There it is.
7/22/1985 I was able to talk you down again that night, and you ‘re getting back to your old self again. I still can’t believe you had your whole room all packed up like that. I’ll give ya that speech all over again as many times as you need, but I’ll write it down here for you: You’re gonna go far, Eddie. You’re gonna tear outta here next year and you’re gonna knock ‘em all dead. You are so talented, you are much more than any of us Munsons have ever been or will ever be, and you’re gonna be the biggest star in the world. You mark my words. And I know you’re gonna fight leavin’ when the time comes, thinking you need to take care of me or some crap but I promise you: The birds’ll still sing, the trailer will still creak, the leaves will die and fall like they do every year, but I’ll be here whenever you need to come back. I’ll be here as long as you need. If that’s forever, so be it.
8/15/1985 I’m taking you up north this weekend. Just to get away, y’know? Before your LAST senior year starts. Might be cutting it a little close on funds, happens when you’re trying to survive, but we’re overdue for a change of scenery. We ain’t living just to die. Only a little going in this time, but I’ll be damned if I don’t add something along with a new note.
10/5/1986 Been a while since I added to this, huh? Well, it’s finally happening. You are leaving tomorrow and boy did you make a stink before you did. Went on a whole tirade about needing to get out of this damn town, about not being able to get anywhere when everyone except me is against you. I wanted to point out that you’ve got your band guys and that Harrington boy in your corner too, but I didn't think you’d like me interrupting your whole big speech about who it is you love and being queer and all that with a “Yeah. I know. You and Steve make moon-eyes at each other all the damn time.” I’ll make sure to pass on your info to him when I get it. He doesn’t seem like one to hold a grudge (or at least not hold it long), so I'm sure he’ll be the first in line to greet you the next time you find yourself in our neck of the woods. Those kids’ll miss you too y’know. They’ll be college age before you know it. I’m gonna pack up this envelope and stash it in your stuff somewhere I know you’ll find it again. so you can find it when you need it. Can’t believe I managed to save you close to a grand. Not enough by a long shot, but it’ll help ya for a while. Been saving for a years now, y’know.. Now Eddie. I told you all this last year, and just now before you slunk off to bed, but here it is again, just in case you need to hear it: - I’m proud of you. - I love you more than you’ll know. - You love whoever it is you want to love (as long as i’m on that list somewhere) - I’m glad you’re getting out of here when you can. And I’ll continue to be glad that you did even when things get hard. When I’m doing all the chores around here myself, when I go visit Al in county even though I know all we’re gonna do is fight… I’ll be so grateful you’re making your own way in the world far from here. I’m not angry at you, Teddy. But you’ll be the greatest thing I’ve lost. I’ll always be here if you need me. Wayne
some notes!
-i hc wayne as a military man ofc and bc of that, my own sloppy, all caps, post military handwriting is perfect for him!
-i like to think eddie thinks he's slick and wayne didn't know he liked boys until he was about to leave but wayne knows. of course he knows. al told him why he kicked eddie out, wayne just didn't think it was his place to bring it up before eddie did.
-didn't think too much farther after this, but let's just say that steddie happens when eddie comes back to hawkins in a couple years when the shitheads graduate.
#you're gonna go far#noah kahan#the munsons my beloveds#wayne munson#eddie munson#picture fic#noelle writes#(literally)
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finally ripped off the bandaid and looked at all the bills from the appendix bullshit and brother i shouldve just drove past the ER to the nearest cemetery and started diggin
#shoulda just carved it out my body with a spoon myself lordddd#everytime theyd so much as get me a cup of water they scanned my wrist bar code thing i fukkin kneeeew these bitches were chargin me#i got enough to save my skin but gahdamn its almost a years worth of workin money#ooUUGGGGHHHH#me chanting to myself at least its over at least its over#ANYWAYaayYy ill hopefully have a drawin up tomorrow🤙
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would i be considered a lunatic if i said that horror's story could be read as a parallel for SA. Hear Me Out: (obviously be careful for reading this bc like,,, sensitive topic)
i feel like the largest parallel could be the actual event of getting his eye taken. a part of his body is "taken" and literally or metaphorically horror was pinned down and forced to give up his body (even worse considering that a literal part of him was PULLED out with a foreign object designed solely to hurt HIM SPECIFICALLY). it's digusting and horror claws and fights his way out to prevent it but unfortunately it still ends up happening no matter what he could've done. no matter how many backup plans or extra contibutions or begging or fighting he did. which like. sounds honestly pretty simple to the reality of victims of SA. that hopelessness of knowing that even if you did as much as you could, covering up, devoting yourself to a life of chastity, not hanging with people like thay, there's still a chance that something bad could happen and all of a sudden everyone's out to get you and how could they just stand by and do NOTHING while you were left to suffer and defend yourself
which leads onto the next point i wanna bring up which is horror's rage immediately after getting his eye stolen. his anger at the betrayal is (very justified my boy did nothing to deserve this) solely about him and his bodily autonomy. undyne (and alphys ig,,,,) couldn't consider ANY other possible solution than to deprive him of his autonomy and decide to just take what they wanted from his body??? AND THE FACT THAT ALPHYS SAID THAT HE MIGHT AGREE TO GIVING UP HIS EYE? it's giving very much so "oh it'll feel good so don't worry" type shit or whatever (horrortale alphys i DONT like you). a betrayal at the hands of someone you trusted a lot about your bodily autonomy? it just gives off that sort of parallel
and the sheer anger and fury that horror felt and enacted on alphys and undyne and everyone else at the CORE just like DUDE. that is a type of anger that only comes out when you've been deeply wronged. sometimes when a horrific experience like getting SAed happens you just wanna explode and drag down everyone around you and ESPECIALLY the perpetrators no matter how much you rationalize. you can have as many people as you want try to convince you that revenge and being hateful isnt the way but it doesn't matter because they havent been wronged the way youve been. horror deserved to be that cruel because undyne and alphys were just as cruel back to him, so he'll be the same and return it 10fold (he probably wasnt even out of bones when he decided to turn them into chips he just wanted to make it a point that he didn't even need to use his full strength to hurt the guards. horror could've EASILY killed alphys but no he wanted it to hurt for her so she could live a life of eternal suffering and fall to her lowest and to ESPECIALLY hurt undyne. because they deserve to suffer just as much as he did if not more for the crime commited against him)
a betrayal as bad as alphys's is only worsened when she tells him that she doesnt regret a single thing about using him for the underground. that has to be the single most infuriating thing for horror to hear because WHAT DO YOU MEAN alphys doesn't regret a thing? that's exactly what some people gloat about after doing terrible things; they try to sweep it under the rug as nothing that bad or justify it OR JUST STRAIGHT UP ADMIT IT!!! nah horrortale alphys deserved to suffer idc
and back onto that feeling of wanting to kick and scream and drag everyone else down with you after being left so used and betrayed due to getting SAed: i know it was bad that horror tricked snowdin into eating humans it was TERRIBLY BAD but really horror was just operating on anger and spite and the need for vengeance. nobody in snowdin ever did anything to hurt him (and i'm sure horror knows that considering he definitely regrets what he did) but to him maybe they also should feel the pain he feels so they can all relate. so that they can't try and fight against him when he says his side of the story and say that undyne was right with what she did. that maybe he wouldn't feel so absolutely devastated after what happened if he saw everyone around him suffering too, and maybe JUST MAYBE he'd get a bit of something back from his sacrifice that he never consented to
i KNOW i'm not reaching with this but idk if i phrased it the best. but to me horror's story really does genuinely parallel to one of an SA survivor's: the betrayal, the anger, the feeling of loneliness and isolation and just feeling absolutely used for a simple thing as your body. chapter 4 of horrortale really is amazing storytelling and so is horror (he was reasonable in what he did IDC WHAT ANYONE SAYS he might be WRONG but it was reasonable. i love horror sans)
#i'm sorry if this is like kinda not srs enough for this topic just know that this came from a place of genuine relation to horror#his story resonates a lot to me about my own personal experiences and the anger and betrayal i felt myself#and i just wanted to point out the similarities i saw 🙁#i think that maybe even without realizing it that he might feel replused at sex and especially the intimacy part#touching his eye socket or head wound is like reliving the entire situation over again and he does NOT WANT THAT AT ALL#its a part of his body that he cant just get rid of because it's necessary which SUCKS#the snarkiness that horror has against undyne even after 7 years is so real#you NEVER forgive your abuser in that situation. i know damn well that the grudge will continue to last on for many more years to come#one day horror and undyne might be able to make up and coexist but horror wont ever be able to TRULY forgive her#a part of you changes viscerally for the worse when you go through something so traumatic#and i think horror's outburst fits that change a lot. it seems almost sudden how quickly he goes from sans to horror#and even though he was still spiralling before the CORE he probably wouldn't have changed so drastically without a betrayal THIS bad#he better get the BEST potential ending in horrortale or else i will RIOT#if aliza doesnt save horrortale and give them all the freedom they DESPERATELY NEED#SAS pls SAS pls don't doom them even more than they already are thats all i need#this metaphor is made even worse with my idea that killer or dust pull him around by the eye or skull#probably not dust (when he's calm (when he's not all boundaries get thrown out the window)#but with killer probably. he doesn't particularly care about what horror wants or keeps to himself#if it gets a barely amusing reaction then sure whatever. horror gets unreasonably pissed anyway for someone who just got his eye taken#in fights they could make it a point to hold onto his skull near the eyewound as tightly as possible#just to make it HURT. dust wants horror to remember him with as much hate as he does for undyne#killer does it to get him to remember that moment except this time no he can't fight back. just to keep him in line#it sucks i know but this trio was never truly made to improve eachother. they were made to drag eachother down worse than they already are#tricule analyze#killer sans#horror sans#dust sans#murder time trio#utmv
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Lots of good replies on this post but I got inspired by @sohrleas' mention of doomsday prepper Philza. So have a little AU idea!
Philza is a doomsday prepper. He believes the end of the world isn't only possible, it's inevitable and it's only a matter of a waiting game before it happens. And when it happens, he does not want to be caught unaware. His wife Kristin makes good money, so he has all the time in the world to devote himself to this eccentric 'hobby'.
Techno, a local college student, befriended Phil when he was looking for a community garden to plant potatoes in for a school project back in high school. He could not find any, but Phil has a lot of land around his house (safely held between fortified walls) and offered up his garden in exchange for some of the produce he could pickle and jar up. Techno thought it was a little sus but took him up on the offer.
Phil turned out to be a very chill guy, they have some interests in common (literature, history, etc), and Techno has a shitty family (no parents, lives with an uncle who is drunk or gone most of the time) so he ends up growing very close to Phil, and also Phil's son Wilbur who is a few years older than Techno, and Tommy, a younger boy who Wilbur views as a little sibling after they met through music camp (Wilbur is a camp counselor and Tommy had one summer of thinking he'd want to be a pianist. He's since abandoned the dream, but Tommy is growing up in a similar situation as Techno, so that's why he hangs out with Wilbur and Phil and sees them as his family).
Techno does think that Phil's conspiracy theories are a little out there but it's not like Phil is doing any harm with them, and Phil manages to be a very nice individual when he's not talking about the coming doomsday, so Techno mostly ignores that whole thing.
Until one day, he goes over to Phil's place for tea and a chat, and ends up feeling very groggy after only a few minutes. Techno has just enough time to realize Phil drugged him before he passes out.
He wakes up a little while later with his right leg chained to a bed.
The bed is in a very nice room, a fully fitted bedroom with living space, bathroom, and everything. And the chain does allow Techno a decent range of motion. But that doesn't change that he's chained up, and there are no windows, and the door is made of steel, bolted from the outside.
Tommy is also in the room, not chained to a bed.
Phil and Wilbur come down after a little bit, and apologize for the circumstances. See, the world has ended, much like they expected it to. And thus, outside isn't safe anymore. Techno asks what the heck that has to do with them being kidnapped and locked up. Phil explains ever so patiently that they've not been kidnapped, they've been saved. Techno and Tommy are part of the family, no way are Wilbur and Phil going to let them die. They're locked up as a precaution, since neither of them has the survival training the other two do, so staying in the room is safer for now. The chain is because Phil has a fair idea of how stubborn Techno can be.
(Techno does instantly prove him right by trying to throttle him.)
Phil also explains that they shouldn't worry. The house is set up to be defendable and loaded with enough supplies to keep them going for at least a few years, not to mention it being completely off the grid in terms of electricity and water. Kristin will be home soon. It will be a while before they even have to think about venturing outside, and when that time comes Phil and Wilbur will do it so Techno and Tommy can be safe and sound. They're younger, after all. Less prepared. It makes sense. They'll have time to learn how to survive too.
Techno tells them they're insane if they think they'll get away with this. It's going to be super obvious when two people with a strong connection to Wilbur and Phil go missing.
Phil shrugs, and says that since almost everybody outside of their house is dead, he doubts anybody is going to come looking for them.
Over the course of the next week or so, Techno and Tommy stay confined in the room. They're brought food, items to occupy themselves with, anything they need. Techno manages to pry out of Phil that this thing that supposedly has ended the world is some sort of disease, but they're being super cagey with the details. They keep telling them not to worry about the specifics. They're safe. Techno tries a few escape attempts, but can't get far because of the chain. Tommy is reluctant about helping because he's a bit confused and scared, he doesn't think Wilbur and Phil would do this without reason, and also because it's honestly not that bad, is it? No more school, just hanging out all day? Tommy doesn't really miss his old life.
But Techno keeps insisting that they need to get out of there and alert the authorities. Eventually, Tommy does help him pick the lock on the chain. The next time Wilbur comes in to bring them food, Techno uses an improvised weapon (a chair leg) to knock him out. Tommy isn't happy with that and refuses to leave when Wilbur is bleeding unconscious on the floor. Seeing no other option, Techno tells Tommy he'll alert help and come back for him, before sneaking through the hallway. He finds a window and climbs out, then books it across Phil's garden to the wall. He manages to scale it somehow, even as he hears Phil yelling for him to come back.
Techno can run quite fast for a nerdy history major.
He gets to the town and finds it deserted. Like, nobody is around. There are cars abandoned on the asphalt, broken store windows, and the smell of rot in the air. But no people at first glance. A large patch of dried blood stands out.
It hasn't truly sunk in for Techno yet that the world did end. He just wanders down the street, confused.
He sees a shape not too far off then, crouching over something else, and automatically calls out. The person - pale, gaunt - turns towards him. Their chin is covered in more blood. They're hunched over a corpse, eating it.
The zombie lunges at Techno.
Techno hits it with the same chair leg he hit Wilbur with, knocking the person - the monster - down. He turns around and tries to run, but strong hands latch onto his ankle and he's pulled down too, hitting his head on the ground hard. He kicks at the thing, feeling bone crunch beneath his heel. The person barely reacts. It has no eyes anymore, and patches of skin have slouched off the flesh. Techno squirms as it lifts his leg and then opens its mouth, sinking teeth into his flesh to tear at it. He screams, kicking again, and manages to get it off. Through vision blurred by pain, he somehow manages to pick up his weapon and bash the person's skull in, over and over and over, until gray matter leaks from the hole and it stops moving.
Techno barely has a moment to process what just happened before another zombie jumps him.
His shoulder slams into a car, then his forehead meets the pavement a second time, so concussion is guaranteed at this point. His ankle burns and he's losing blood fast. He thinks it bit deep enough to rip into his arteries. The second zombie is even more ambitious, teeth gnashing to reach his throat. Techno struggles to fend it off with his hands on its shoulders but he doesn't know how long he can keep it up.
Right as his strength is failing him, a gunshot rings out across the street. The zombie's head explodes into a spray of gore. Techno just slumps, going boneless, exhausted and hurt.
Phil looms over him, looking so genuinely scared. Seeing the bite on Techno's ankle, he curses. He says something else, but Techno passes out before he can really grasp it.
He wakes up chained to a bed again.
Though it's his other leg this time. Because his right leg, the leg he was chained with the first time, the leg that got bitten, is gone.
Phil is sitting next to him, and he's so relieved when Techno manages to squint at him. He apologizes to Techno. Not for the whole 'locking him up' thing. For not doing it better.
Phil never wanted Techno or Tommy to see all that terribleness. Phil and Wilbur were prepared for all that, but Techno and Tommy weren't. Phil wished he could have done a better job, and shielded them from the cruelty and the gore. At least until they were older, more adjusted. That's also why he hid the details of the disease earlier. It makes people ravenous, hungry for human flesh. It turns them into monsters. He thought it would have been easier if Techno and Tommy believed the disease simply killed people. That it would give them some peace.
Techno is sick, feverish, as he listens to the explanation. Phil says he thinks he was in time with the amputation. Techno will live, though the long-term effects of the virus might be nasty even in a low dose. Techno could be prone to bouts of sickness forever, and never regain full strength. Not to mention he's short a leg now. It's regrettable since Phil was planning to teach both Techno and Tommy how to survive in the long run. For Tommy, that's still an option. But for Techno, he might be forever incapacitated to some degree.
But that's alright. Between the four of them, they can take care of Techno even if he needs some extra help. That's what family is for, after all.
In completely unrelated news, zombie apocalypse AUs slap and I should write one if only I had a good idea
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Grips my shirt and tears it apart so that all the buttons go flying and SCREAMS I love Law and Cora so much what the FUCK!!!!
#Shima speaks#SLAMS MY HEAD INTO THE WALL. BREAKING THE PLASTER. LEAVING A HOLE#AGHHH. AGHHFHF HELP#Cora who saw a kid so angry and bitter at the world decided to throw away everything to save him despite the whole WORLD saying he couldn’t#Law who finally realized there’s still hope left in the world and hope left for him and there’s someone willing to sacrifice EVERYTHING#Just to save him. Just to give him a fighting chance. Just to let him be FREE#Law who came to realize how much Cora meant to him and how much love and care Cora had for him. Then losing all that in an INSTANT#The one person he cared about more than anything sacrificed his LIFE for him#And Law spent the next 13 YEARS working to avenge Cora…naming his pirate crew getting tattoos fashioning his Jolly Roger ALL after Cora#TATTOOS!!! HE GOT PERMANENT MARKINGS ON HIS BODY SYMBOLIZING CORA#I’M. GOING TO FUCKING EXPLODE AND BLOW UP. WHAT THE FUCKKKKKK#Oda writing the most epic revenge quest in history#They mean so much to me I’m GOING to die. Right here and now#Cora giving up everything for Law and Law giving up everything for Cora…THAT’S TRUE LOVE BABEY#No matter what kind of form it comes in that’s TRUE. LOVE. PERIODT#One Piece#Do you think Law still would have gotten tattoos symbolizing Cora if Cora had lived. I wonder about that sometimes.#I feel like he would. I feel like he’d wear them proudly and Cora would be SO embarrassed about it#Law’s not shy about shit like that he’d be super smug about it too#Law: You saved me and gave my life meaning why WOULDN’T I want to permanently mark my body to honor that#Cora: Because it’s embarrassing! Lawwww!!! 😭#Law: Too bad doing it anyway <3#Cora: You know what. Fine. But I’m getting a tattoo that symbolizes YOU#Law: PLEASE???#Cora: WH. WAIT THAT BACKFIRED THAT IS NOT HOW YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO REACT#Cora you NEED to match his freak okay.#I heavily hc Law to be absolutely unhinged over the people he cares about#Like scarily possessive AND obsessive kind of unhinged#He and Cora can have an unhealthy codependent relationship. As a treat <3#Okay shutting up now SORRY I’m just. Unwell. Sighs dramatically
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