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#but i hate how i am exhausted every night
icallhimjoey · 3 days
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Not sure if you've done this but it fits the general mood of the fandom lately: I want grovel-y Joe. Knows he really fucked up but he's a guy so he doesn't know how to fix it so he just throws anything at the wall to see what sticks. And honestly we're not sure if we'll forgive him but we're definitely sticking around to see how far he's willing to go.
(yes I am in therapy 🤣)
okay im using this request to fix whatever that bullshit was that i wrote before this - hope you enjoy! Wordcount: 3.8K
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I'll Let The Sun Decide
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Joe realises it in the morning. Feels like the biggest fucking idiot in the world.
Correction: the biggest fucking idiot on the moon.
He watches you walk out of his bedroom after leaving a perfect cup of coffee, exactly how he likes it, on his bedside table and everything about that makes his heart ache.
After the way he behaved last night, he knows he doesn't deserve a sweet gesture from the girl who looks like she only managed to sleep for about two hours.
You look exhausted.
He only catches a glimpse of you, and a few seconds later he can hear the coffee machine go again. You're making a coffee for yourself after making him one, and Joe can't help but groan his face into his pillow.
Fuck.
He didn't reach out for you in the night.
Your one fucking rule.
He vaguely remembers going, "Hmm?" after he raised his head off his pillow in a jolt.
"Just me." You'd whispered, nothing malicious hidden in your voice, because it was after midnight and it wasn't the time to continue whatever you'd started earlier that evening.
He should've reached over then.
He hadn't. Not even a knee to your thigh, or a toe to your foot.
Nothing.
He should've been happy you'd come back to his flat instead of going to your own. You could've so easily decided to avoid him for a bit, but you didn't. You said you'd come back, and then you did, and, fuck.
He hadn't reached out.
He hadn't even read the texts you'd sent. Left you with a bunch of grey ticks.
Well.
He had read them, but only in the notification bar.
He'd seen the messages about you making it to the office safely. Of how Charlotte was there too - you'd do the work together and you'd be done much faster that way. A little later of how you'd just be another hour, and of how you'd let him know when you'd leave.
He wanted you to feel bad about choosing your work over him, so he withheld the coloured ticks and had felt real fucking smug over it. It was sickening how right he'd felt about his actions in the moment. Every petty little thing justified, just because you'd hurt his feelings.
You'd climbed into bed after he had already fallen asleep, and the feeling of movement next to him pulled him from his slumber. And then, instead of reaching over like he should have done, he had sighed all heavily, like he was really fucking annoyed that you'd woken him up as you got comfortable under his covers. He'd rolled over and ignored you. Turned his back and festered in his own anger like a moody teenager because he truly believed you deserved it.
What a fucking loser.
Didn't touch you all night.
The realisation slaps him in the face unexpectedly, and your early-morning kind gesture is what flips the entire script. What a fucking loser of a boyfriend.
You've made the deadline.
Joe sees it when he opens his messages after taking a perfect sip of hot coffee, and it's weird how he feels awful about himself and proud of you at the same time.
He didn't need to let the world burn over such a tiny inconvenience.
Joe hates the moon.
Longs for the sun.
The moon is cold and dark and he's all alone up there, only warmed by the light the sun will bring him.
The sun. Or, the messy-haired girl with tired eyes in soft clothes too big for her body who brought him a hot cup of coffee before she even made one for herself. Either or. Same thing.
Joe stares at your messages in silence, gives you the coloured ticks he should've given you last night, and feels heavy guilt find home in the pit of his stomach.
You finished all the work in time. Probably have done a real good job at it too. Did it at the office, away from Joe's bad temper, and managed to actually focus and forget about how he told you to fuck off when you were already on your way out anyway.
What a dick-move.
Fragile ego syndrome, you'd guessed then.
That dick-move is what had you second-guessing going back over to Joe's for a while. Maybe going back to your own flat was the smarter idea. Avoid the confrontation and just text him the next day, after he'd cooled off a bit.
Maybe he'd actually read those then.
Another dick-move.
Joe could be so annoying sometimes, but it was easy to read him and you knew that just a little consideration of your time would fix whatever this silly issue was. With that in mind, you'd made your way back over to his.
You knew his dick-moves only meant he was going to feel bad about himself come tomorrow morning.
And you were right.
Besides an annoyed sigh and a soft grumble, you didn't get much else from him when you got into bed.
That was fine.
Again, you didn't think it was the right time to continue a fight anyway.
But the morning brought something new.
You woke up before Joe did and it took a few seconds for you to remember. To realise your prediction was right. Joe hasn't reached out in the night. No silent I still love you touch under the covers for you.
And it stings.
Could make you cry if you thought about it long enough.
Joe's stayed on his side of the bed, facing away from you, and you tell yourself that at least you've come back to his flat like you said you would. You finished the work you had to finish, and did the right thing by returning.
But then, you concluded, you also haven't reached out to him at all, and immediately felt bad.
Joe can be so annoying sometimes, but you do still love him, and a warm palm to a shoulder blade could've at least let him know.
It would've made you the bigger person.
Which, you still were. You came back, didn't you? But Joe was being an absolute child and you didn't want to sink down to his level.
You should've reached over. Should've touched him. You have no good excuse for not following the one rule you came up with after your first real argument, and now you feel bad.
Shit.
The coffee is to make up for it. At least a little. To say, I'm sorry I didn't reach out, here's me doing that now.
"Morning," you whispered when you saw him stir and open a squinty, confused eye.
You didn't wait for a reply. Just left the coffee there and walked back to go and make yourself one too.
Joe watched you leave and the moon came crashing down.
He knows what the coffee means.
He's read your messages, can hear you make breakfast in his kitchen and decides he needs to reach out too. With his coffee in hand, he gets up and makes his way over to his living area where he finds you rubbing your fist into an eye through a yawn, with a carton of eggs in the other hand.
"Morning," he croaks, and sees how it's only just starting to get light outside, it's so early still.
It feels a little weird and embarrassing to speak to you right now. To remember how you'd been in this same room just a few hours ago, and he'd told you to fuck off.
Fuck off, he'd said. To his girlfriend. Had meant it with his whole chest too. What a fucking idiot.
You turn your head to give him a small smile that doesn't reach your eyes, and ask, "Do you want some eggs?"
The moon can die.
He doesn't want the moon.
The moon is too far from the sun. He wants you closer and happy and well-rested and for your smile to overtake your whole lovely beautiful face when you see him and he hasn't got the faintest clue where to even start to fix it.
He doesn't know how to turn all the feelings in his chest into words to convey how sorry he feels. Has no idea what to say. Has no idea how you'll react to a verbal apology either.
But you look so soft, shoulders slouched, the scrunched up bit of fabric that held your hair up and out of your face as you slept about to slip out. And, even though he can tell it's not a real smile, you're still giving him a kind face. You're being civil.
You've made him a coffee how he likes it and just offered to make him some eggs and, Jesus, he's just the most awful person ever, isn't he?
The overwhelming need to wrap himself around all of you takes over.
Joe leaves his coffee on the side and steps closer to attach himself to your back. You accept it, and he can feel how you let your head rest against the side of his as he hugs you, arms tight around your waist.
He's glad that you let him.
But he also feels the defeat there.
The, Joe what the fuck, that's waiting to slip out of your mouth. Maybe it's why you're keeping things surface level. No time or energy to get into an actual conversation right now. Just breakfast eggs and perfect coffee.
That's okay.
Joe doesn't know what to say anyway, and he'd love some eggs, actually.
"I'd love some, but," Joe kisses the side of your face, does it quick so he doesn't have to feel you pull away from it, and then gently moves you aside. "Let me."
A first attempt at fixing it.
Joe finishes breakfast whilst you go for the quickest shower of your life. When you turn the water off he asks what time you need to leave from the kitchen. His eyes find your coffee that's going cold, and he thinks it's so stupid that you have to be back at work so soon.
This time he doesn't feel sorry for himself, though. This time he feels sorry for you.
It's a big difference.
You've only just left the office, Joe thinks. And sure, sometimes he makes long hours and feels like he lives on set, but you're in an office.
He knows that's different.
Worse.
You've got to go and present all the things you've finished and he knows you like it just as much as he does. That being: not at all. There's no use in getting angry at you.
He sees that now.
You're just as much at fault for not being able to go out with him last night as he is. That being: not at all.
Joe watches you take a few hurried mouthfuls of egg on toast, and he wants to tell you sorry before you leave.
He doesn't.
Isn't sure how, and feels like a literal child because, Jesus Christ, they're just words.
But you smile at him, even though it's only small. And you let him kiss your cheek on your way out. And when you've left, it's not even eight o'clock, which is too fucking early, and he decides he needs to give you more quiet I love yous that he didn't give you under the covers in the night the way he should've done.
You get flowers delivered to the office that afternoon.
It's a large bunch, beautiful colours, and you can't lie; it absolutely makes you smile. You can tell it's expensive, and you know he's paid extra for the same day delivery, but... he didn't reach for you last night, and you didn't reach for him either, and whenever you think of Joe, that's all that comes to mind.
You'd seen him turn to stone.
So cold and careless.
Had seen in his face how he didn't give a single shit about how inconsiderate he was being.
A bunch of flowers isn't going to magically make that visual go away, but it's nice that he' tried's trying, and you try to hold onto that.
When you leave the office that day, you text Joe that you're headed to your own flat because there's food in your fridge that needs eating before it goes off, and your dishwasher is half filled with dirty dishes that have been in there for about a week already, so you kind of need to go turn it on, and there's probably also a load of laundry you could do, plus a quick pass of your floors with a vacuum, maybe.
Joe doesn't get to read it for a few hours. Busy day on set. When he eventually does, sort of annoyed that you had to wait for his coloured ticks again, he texts back, "Yours?"
And you text back so quickly, it makes his guilt grow.
"don't forget your key, im gonna lie down "
Perfect, Joe thinks. He'll sneak in and maybe get some of your shit sorted whilst you kip on your sofa.
But when he walks in, you're not on the sofa. You're already in bed, and that's sort of heartbreaking, because it's so early, and Joe finds the food that's about to go off uneaten in your fridge still. Finds the dishwasher still half filled, smelling rank, dirty dishes growing mould in there. He also sees the full hamper that needs sorting and washing, and, how had he even had the gall to assume that you could just make time for him at a moment's notice when you hadn't even been able to take care of any of this?
Joe starts the dishwasher.
Sorts your dirty laundry and starts a dark wash.
Cooks the food that's about to go off and places it in plastic tubs to have at another time.
Notices you've not taken the flowers that he had express delivered home and tries not let that affect him, but fails.
You're not sure what it is that wakes you. The beeping of the dishwasher, or the clanging of plates as Joe places the clean ones back into their cupboards. When Joe comes to find you, you're on your side, facing away from the door, but Joe can see you're awake by the light from your phone that silhouettes you.
"You're awake," Joe says, voice surprised, and it makes you turn to look over your shoulder.
"Hey," you say softly, and Joe's eyebrows knit together automatically at how sad you sound.
"Thanks for the flowers," you turn in bed to let Joe kiss you as he bends over to place a small one to your forehead. "They got delivered during my presentation."
"Was it embarrassing?" Joe asks, sitting down next to you, one arm either side of you as he leans over. Kisses you again, but on your mouth this time.
"Very. Vanessa just barged in with them."
"Did you like them?"
"Hmm," you nod and give a little smile. Joe's glad for it, but he feels there's a distance there still. You're keeping your hands to yourself, even though his bare arms are right there.
"I um," Joe starts, and wants to start listing all the things he's done. Wants to tell you how he's been sweet, and kind, like you were with him this morning, and he wants those things to be the silent I love yous he should've given you last night.
But then he changes his mind and says, "Did the, um... did the presentation go okay?"
You nod, because it did go really well, actually. Thank fuck. But Joe doesn't ask any more questions about it, and he seems to hesitate to even speak at all. Seems to want to say something that he's clearly not saying. Afraid to say the wrong thing, maybe. You wonder if there's a sincere I'm sorry hiding in there somewhere.
"You seem tired..." he skirts around the issue, and it's disappointing, but not surprising.
"I am tired."
Then Joe looks at the empty space in your bed for a moment and gets up. Starts undressing. Leaves his clothes in a neat pile on your dresser and goes to brush his teeth.
When Joe looks at himself in the mirror, he frowns.
Fucking idiot.
Look at that coward.
He rests both hands on the sink, hangs into his shoulders, breathes through flared nostrils, and feels like a failure. You must think he is one too.
He didn't reach over last night.
With his toothbrush still in his mouth, he steps back into your bedroom and inhales a deep breath through his nose before he mumbles a barely audible and a very foamy, "I shouldn't have..."
He hears himself, grumbles low in this throat and turns on his heel, spits the toothpaste out and comes back.
Starts again.
"I shouldn't have said those things. Last night. I was being a dick, I shouldn't have done– well, anything, really. I was being mean just to be mean, I'm–"
"Joe," you interrupt, your voice soft.
You didn't reach out either.
"No," Joe argues, moves to sit back down next to you, arms back either side of you, hands pressing into the mattress. "You have nothing to be sorry for, I just," Joe sighs. Frowns. Doesn't know what to say.
What can he say to make you run a hand up one of his forearms?
"I didn't..." he tries once more, but falters again. Drops his head and knows he can't cry because he is not the person he's hurt.
He didn't reach over last night.
"Hey. I didn't either."
You read between the lines, even though your vision goes blurry with tears. You can hear the words Joe isn't saying and can read the thoughts he's not communicating. Joe's face always tells you a million things. You wonder if he's aware how easy he is to read.
You also wonder if he's aware that it's not going to be enough.
Joe swipes a thumb across your temple, close to your eye, and catches a tear that was about to slide into your hair.
He swallows thickly. Tries to swallow down whatever's hurting his throat.
"I don't want to live on the moon..." he then mutters, regretting how he set the world on fire. He wants to live on planet earth, even though it's all grey and black ashes now. He'll plant flowers there. Will feed them water, and will politely ask the sun let them grow.
Will ask you.
You're the sun.
You get to decide.
You don't fully understand what Joe means, because it sounds ridiculous, actors and their theatrics, but you tell him you don't want to live on the moon either and he huffs a laugh at how absurd that sounds coming from your straight face that's pretending it's not actively crying.
You're the sun.
Of course you don't want to live on the moon, silly.
"Your priority–" you start, breath hitching, but Joe is quick to interrupt.
"You. You. Us. I'm... it's us. I promise, it's us..." Joe sighs again, seemingly upset at remembering his own behaviour.
"Saying that is easy, though," you start, finally letting your fingers slowly wrap around one of his arms.
A touch.
It's enough to make Joe's whole face crumble.
He ducks down. Lets his arms find your shoulders to pull you up a little so he can hug you properly, both arms wrapped tightly around your frame, his face hidden into your neck, and you know Joe's only crying because of your fingertips touching his wrist. The smallest things can get him sometimes – so dramatic.
But you continue, "I believe that you believe that your priority is us, but when you're stomping around your kitchen, blaming me for shit I have no controll over, telling me that it's my fault that I–"
"No," Joe mumbles into your skin, and pulls back just enough to press his forehead against yours. "No."
And you give his forehead a slight push with yours and you want to say, yes.
Yes that's what you were doing.
Yes that's what happened.
Yes you got caught up in all of your own feelings and forgot that I have a whole set of my own.
But then Joe whispers, "I'm sorry." and you can't help but go absolutely lax in his hold.
"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have. I love you, I'm sorry." he whispers his apologies against your mouth through heavy breaths because he's doing his best to not cry, but he's failing, because then he feels you shake with a sob, and, fuck that, he'll banish himself to the moon, actually.
He'll live up there no matter how miserable it is, and he'll take whatever sunlight he can get, and he'll be thankful for the rays you'll allow to even reach him at all.
"You didn't t-touch–" you stutter, and immediately feel Joe squeeze you tighter.
"I'm sorry, I love you. I'm so sorry." Joe whispers right into your ear. Keeps repeating it, over and over and over.
Your one rule.
He should've never broken it.
It's good to hear the words, the I'm sorrys tumbling over his lips, and you'll accept them for now. But actions speak louder than words, and you know that there will probably be a time where the way the world treats Joe will make his head grow to twice its size again. He'll do and say similar shit. Won't want to meet you halfway, but will demand that you make the trek all the way over to him, won't care what the ground will look like, and won't care if you're wearing shoes for it or not.
Joe doesn't know it right now, but you can see into the future and know it will happen again.
And when it does, you'll grow a little colder.
Let some of your rays die out.
"Here. Lay back." Joe says after holding you for a while, and when your head finds your pillow again, Joe curls around and uses every body part of his to touch yours under the covers.
Every inch of skin touching yours is a big fat quiet I love you that he'll repeatedly tell you all night. He's not gonna let go.
He knows he's on the moon still. Up there, all alone. Cold. In the dark.
He said he's sorry, but knows it's not enough.
Wants off, but is smart enough to not set foot somewhere he's not allowed yet.
He has said that he's sorry, and now he needs to wait for the sun.
Wait for you.
And he'll touch you under the covers until you're ready.
Whispers the promises into your hair as you fall asleep.
You get to decide.
He'll let the sun decide.
---
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tacitusauxilium · 26 days
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((Hi guys!
I am not dead, I swear. I just got back from a two week vacation...and it was a rough one. Sleeping on the couch because I didn't think things through with the bed situation...that was my bad.
So finally I'm home and sleeping in a bed with my husband just feels so liberating! lol
Honestly, idk when I'll be back on here. We have to re-bid for new shifts because of the union and with us getting 20% more freight during winter coming up, I'm praying I can get a Wednesday-Saturday shift. I hate working Sundays so badly.
And with my husband working only two days a week, even though they got unionized, too, I'm just stressed out and burned out. Having only one day off for my husband and the kid and the other two days are dedicated to my kid having his speech therapy sessions--I can't find time to be on here. Yet.
I'm trying to get back on Discord and be active there, but my motivation is at an all time low atm. Something will spark my attention back here. I miss Fuuka a bunch--I think writing my fanfic does help me a little but baby steps, first.
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ersatz-anomaly · 8 months
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“If you’re not constantly battling 24/7 you’re transphobic” maybe we’re just completely burnt out from the endless uphill battle you single braincelled amoeba
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algolstare · 2 years
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the closer i get to having to lay down in bed the worse and worse my mental state gets </3 even though i would love being asleep and resting were it not for the horrors.
#teddyposting#id love to sleep on a couch or a chair or maybe even the floor#anything but a bed. man#i hate having to sleep. because it starts to feel like having survived is a punishment for me in and of itself somehow#to where everything is painful and all things come up that i wish would stay down and away#and i hate having to force myself to lay down and rest because it is very cruel#i can never convince myself well enough that it is safe and okay. and so it ends up being#making myself go into the worst thing ever. in the feel of it#and then i have my nightmares and wake up feeling exhausted still.#and that is nearly every night since before preschool.#i do not think i will ever have restful nights. it has been stolen and cannot be recovered i am pretty sure#sometime tomorrow when the sun is up and there are lovely things and all of this is back down and away#i will not feel that to survive is a punishment. but right now it is so terrible#and so all-consuming. it drowns out everything else and cannot be soothed#and i have to lay down to rest anyhow. even though i am not the one who did wrong i am the one to carry it#i am the one who carries the shame of it the burden of it the othering of it made into something and not someone#the fear and the restlessness and the pain of it. in every way#even though i am not the one who did wrong. i am the one to carry it and i am the one to be thrown#maybe what is the worst thing is how he had not been lying to me. even though#that is the kind of thing any predator would say to try to convince you not to tell to keep his secret. for my life#it was not a lie: nobody was on my side. nobody is still. my family hated me for it. hates me still.#i was left abandoned for it. i have no good family. he was not lying at all#csa ment#to survive is not a punishment. it only feels that way
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katszumi · 1 month
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every room stood still. your kitten, katsuki insisted on naming 'skullcrusher', also didn't dare to move.
your head hung low, feeling the stuffy air sneak into your lungs. you glanced at the clock on your watch. 7:19. the usual time katsuki arrived at the doorstep.
normally, you'd rush to the door, showering your boyfriend with short pepper kisses on his face. but you remained on the velvet couch, the same couch you picked out when house shopping with katsuki.
a click sounded, indicating the door was recently unlocked. you harshly breathed in the same stuffy air, forcing yourself to swallow the panic that resided inside of you.
katsuki slugged through the door, immediately dropping his bag at the front door. his eyes met yours then to the kitchen, his face contorting slightly at the sight. it was empty?
"no food. what's up with you?" his words came off more formidable than he liked, especially when he knew something wasn’t right.
katsuki inched towards you, his eyebrows wearing an expression of its own. they were furrowed, his right eyebrow a little deeper than the other.
"katsuki," you started, breaking your words off.
he slightly cocked his head in confusion and worry. as he came closer, not only did he see your presence shaking alongside the couch, but he also saw two suitcases behind you that were clearly filled to the brim.
you watched how his eyes widened, how his teeth unclenched leaving his jaw to drop. his ruby irises instantly shot back towards you, scanning your face for any signs that you were playing a joke on him.
"what the fuck." the words leave his mouth too quick for him to register.
you swallowed nothing. "katsuki, we need to talk."
"talk?!" his mouth opened to continue yet no words seemed to come. oddly enough, for the first time, he was speechless.
"i-i need you to listen to me." you hated the fact that you stammered on your words.
"and then what?!" he paused, "you leave me?" katsuki's voice lowered in volume, a tone of angst leaked within his words.
you attempt to stand strong. you weren't even sure if this was the right choice now by looking at his wounded face.
slowly, you nodded.
"yes."
katsuki was expecting that. hell. who wouldn't when their girlfriend has two suitcases behind her? but hearing the words leave her mouth was entirely different. it was like a shot through his heart, the bullet penetrating every piece of restraint he had.
his head turned to the side. he was battling his thoughts; every fucked up thing he did occuring to his mind.
"is it because i left my bloody rag on the counter the night before? because if so, i promise to god, i will never do it again. i know how much you despise it." he went on his own plethora, his words and body language holding enormous amounts of panic.
"katsuki." you reinstated again. if he went on like this much longer, you were afraid you'd never have the strength again to walk out of the door.
"or because i yell too loudly at ungodly hours?" he ignored your words.
"katsuki." you repeated.
"i understand i'm not the easiest person. fuck. i'm even shocked i've gotten this far." he rambled, not caring about a word you have to say. he had to say something, do something, in order to convince you. bargaining with all of his strength. "what have i done? what do i need to fix?"
you reach for his hand, molding your hand to fit in his. you placed your open hand on top, soothing small circles into his skin.
"it's not you, katsuki."
katsuki's face fell. "then, why are you leaving me?"
"i can't live like this. i was not taught to be a housewife. to clean, cook, wait for your arrival every night at seven o'clock just to eat dinner with you." you shook your head. "i don't have a job or even a hobby! i am stuck within these walls everyday, the paparazzi at damn near every corner doesn't help either. i am exhausted being alone all day."
you could feel the sweat accumulate on katsuki's palms.
"i'll tell the media to back off. i swear to it. a-and, i know somebody who's looking for help with their business, i can set it u—"
"katsuki, i am miserable here!" you interrupted his words, slightly raising your voice. "i can't do it anymore! you are a pro-hero, dedicating your life to these people everyday. and what am i doing? making sure that your stomach is filled and that there's no stains on a countertop!"
katsuki was quiet, allowing the words to settle in. taking the moment of silence of advantage, you slipped your hands from his.
"you're a pro hero. you've made the ranks. you've accomplished everything you've hoped for." you sighed. "i just don't fit within your schedule."
katsuki remained silent, reality now kicking in for him. he bit the inside of his cheek to restrain the tears that were welling in his eyes.
"i'm sorry. i truly, really am. i just need to accomplish my own goals before it's too late."
katsuki's eyes fell to the ground, a very slow nod coming from him. he cleared his throat, also sniffling to remove the snot that was aching to run down his nose.
"where will you be staying?"
you echoed his action from earlier, turning your head sideways. you couldn't face him anymore after utterly destroying his heart.
"it's best if you don't know."
he paused. "right."
you spun on your heel to bend down behind you, grabbing your overly stuffed suitcases. you increased the height on the handles, slowly trudging them towards the door.
you couldn't believe that this was happening. it was a last minute decision. lying down in bed, realizing that if this continued, you'd be nothing more but a trophy wife that's made no true accomplishments on her own.
you were more than that. more than a cleaner and cook.
"i didn't accomplish everything." katsuki broke the silence.
you halted your steps, peering at him over your shoulder. you hoped he took the silence as permission to continue.
"i wanted to marry you. have a big ass wedding reception and drink until we could barely see anymore." he dryly chuckled. "maybe even have a few flowergirls of our own. that goal mattered more to me than any accomplishments i've made before in this life." your heart clenched at the fact.
tears covered your vision, your breathing starting to become sporadic.
"you can keep skullcrusher." you faced forward, grabbing the door handle. "i love you, kats. thank you for everything." your words trembled, tears uncontrollably streaming down your face.
as the door shut behind you, katsuki buried his face into his hands, and cried like a little boy in his now empty, silent home.
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mindscollision · 1 year
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why are you tryna be someone you're not
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luulapants · 1 year
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Existential despair is so common in a person's twenties, I think, because up until that point, we've had a pretty clear road map for what's expected of us and we haven't had much reason to question that map. There are still a few milestones outlined for us (start a career, get married, make babies) but more and more young people are entering the post-school world and realizing:
A) that career thing just isn't happening like they said it would
B) I'm not ready to get married/I don't want to get married/marriage isn't the sort of life-altering event that it used to be
C) I'm not ready to make babies/I don't want a baby/I can't afford to raise children right now (see point A)
And in the absence of these milestones to shoot for (which one could argue weren't the promise of fulfillment they claimed to be in the first place), what we're left with is this aimless abyss of "the rest of our lives" sprawling out ahead of us with no indication of how it will go or what we should be doing to shape it. Young people start their first jobs, find they hate them, and think to themselves, "Is this it? Am I just supposed to do this job until I'm too old to do it or die first?"
Which is, yeah, really fucking depressing!! So here's my best attempt at an alternate roadmap for young people that don't vibe with the old model. Please feel free to add in your own suggestions!
Learn how you work and what you want out of a job. Unless you've been in a job-specific training program that gives you hands-on experience, your first jobs should be experiments. Learn how a full-time job feels for you, what elements are more or less difficult. Different workplaces have different cultures and expectations - what do you need out of a job environment? Do you need to find fulfillment in your job or is it enough for it to pay the bills and leave you time to find outside fulfillment? Do you want to climb a corporate ladder or are you content to hunker down as long as your bills get paid? This period of experimentation is exhausting and may feel like it's consuming your whole life.
Learn how to make time for things outside of work. Adapting to a full-time work environment often leaves you feeling so drained that you can't do anything but go home and collapse on the couch every day. That's fine - for a little while. But it can also become a habit. You need to learn how to do things after work or you'll go crazy. Go to a trivia night. Start an exercise schedule. Take a class in your community. Find volunteer work. Join a band. You will find that putting more things into your day makes you feel like you have more time, not less.
Find a community. Making friends as an adult can feel impossible. Where do you find these mysterious friends everyone seems to have?? This goes along with #2, though. As you start regularly attending the same activities, you will find that repeat interactions with the same people turn into friendships or at least friendly acquaintances. Say yes to invitations. Get involved in your local community. Strive to be connected enough to bump into people at the grocery store.
Unlearn bad lessons. We all internalize some messed up things when we're growing up. As you start off your adult life, that's the time to actively work at unpacking the things you've brought with you from childhood and deciding which things are helping you and which things are harming you. This might mean therapy or joining a spiritual group or reading new things or just making special time to be in your own head.
Learn the lessons you missed. In this, I mostly mean practical things. "Adulting." Areas of your day-to-day practical life that are causing you extreme stress are probably related to a knowledge or experience gap. Do you hate cooking and cleaning or were you not taught how to do it properly? Are you afraid of making medical appointments or is it just something new you're not used to? Does money make you queasy or do you need to learn how to make a budget?
Find something fulfilling. This can be your job. It can be volunteer work. It can be faith. It can be a hobby. It can be creating things. It can be challenging yourself physically. It can be activism. It can be going for walks in nature. Everyone finds fulfillment in different places. If you're not finding it where you are, look somewhere else.
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targaryenluvs · 9 months
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— ALL GROWN UP
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pairings: coriolanus snow x fem!reader
summary: you were always tigris's annoying rich friend to coriolanus, but once he returns from 12 you seem to be irresistible, not only to him.
warnings: normal coryo in all honesty, jealousy, flirting, p in v, oral (m), choking, kinda subby coryo - for a bit, time gap he spent a year in 12 (i got lazy this is short and basically just porn with slight plot)
a/n: hehehehe first fic of 2024 kiddos besides the klaus one!
your laughter was the last thing coriolanus wanted to hear, ever. it was still annoying when he was here, and it was still once he returned.
"there's no way!" tigris giggled a loud as you joined in.
"tigris?" he called out to her, waiting. "coryo!" tigris yelled as she ran to him, his arms open for her. "it's so good to see you, you’ve been so busy." you laughed, "your hair, it's worse in person." would you shut up? who were you to interrupt a family-
your night dress was black, short, barely below your crotch. lace details, messy hair, you were nothing short a of a dream, and it was messing with his head. he was so use to hating you, your stupid gorgeous face and here he was, dumbstruck. “y/n?” you nodded with a sweet smile, “how are you coriolanus?”
he sighed, “exhausted, between the university and dr gaul, it seems i’m stretched thin these days.” you nodded along, “it seems you’re well on your way to success.” he inhaled, not use to your kind words, “thank you.”
apparently you were staying with the snow’s for a week or so, much to coriolanus’s elation. surprisingly, in the time he’d been away you’d become, tolerable. it sure as hell had nothing to do with the sway in your walk, your sweet eyes looking up at him and your new found confidence, no he just felt nice.
he was itching to get a taste.
he’d seen you out and about, talking with almost all the people around. a kind smile aimed at quite literally everyone. almost every guy in the restaurant seemed to know you, and he couldn’t help but feel annoyed.
didn’t they know you came for lunch with him?
shouldn’t they know better?
you weren’t his, yet.
it was late at night, you needed something to drink.
grandma’ams tea isn’t exactly the most refreshing. you were in the midst of scouring the kitchen for a teabag of actual flavour when you’d heard him behind you.
“looking for this?” he held the jar in his hands, “actually, yes.” you walked over to grab it and he only held it higher, “coryo, please.” he grinned, “coryo huh?” you placed your hands on your hips, annoyed, “yes, now if you don’t mind.” the jar clattered on the counter and you quickly swiped it away. “would you like some?”
in the reflection of the glass cabinet, you saw him shake his head, “i’m in the mood for something else.” you giggled at his vagueness, “oh? and what might that be mr snow?” his smirk was all you needed to know what he was hinting at. “you’re playing a dangerous game here coryo,” he feigned confusion, “am i now?” you smiled, “yes you are.” he was behind you now, breath heavy and hot on your shoulder, “i might be, question is, are you willing to play?”
his lips were on your neck, light as ever, open mouthed kisses all the way up to your cheek. “cory” he gathered your hair, swinging it over your shoulder, “cory? that’s new.” you smiled, “i know. i’m going to take a shower, wanna join? to conserve water of course.” as if they need to, they had more than enough money now.
“to conserve, of course.”
the hot water rose steam, surrounding you as coryo watched from outside. the fog covered up all the parts he wanted to see, and his night pants seemed smaller. soap running all over you, soft hands trailing down. “i think you’ll get a much better view from in here.”
he ripped his clothes off, practically stumbling around in the soft glow of the guest room lamp. he’d been waiting for so long. ten minutes. his hands massaged your scalp, washing it off remaining shampoo and conditioner. ridding your body of any soap, your shoulders, your stomach, your thighs.
and soon enough he pressed you against the wall, imprints of hands staining the glass. you were both unbearably needy, messy kisses and desperate touches. you revelled in his grasp, you felt as if your skin was on fire. “y/n, please.” he whined. you giggled at his begging, “please what coryo?” you stroked his dick as he groaned out, “suck me off. now.” you laughed at his words, “pretty bossy for someone who was whining like a little bitch two seconds ago.” he was about to protest but your warm mouth on him seemed to shut up all forms of protest.
“oh god.” he leaned his head back on the wall as you dug your nails into the back of his thighs. the water pouring down on the two of you made coryo glisten, his abs looking especially sweet. droplets of water fell down from his hair onto you.
as if you weren’t enough the view of you on your knees, your tuts on display was more than enough for him to explode down your throat. “fuck, when did you learn to do this slut? you been practicing f’me?” his attempt at regaining control had you suppressing your laughter.
but his hand in your hair tugging you to your feet, crazy eyes and a very attractive smirk? “only for you cory.” you wrapped your arms around his neck and gently kissed him, “all for me.”
“please, cory. i need you.” you leaned your head against his as he directed his cock to entrance, teasing you. “you want it?” you nodded your head vehemently, “god just please, fuck me.” he kissed your cheek before pushing in, “anything you say baby.” you moaned out at the feeling of him in you, filling you to the brim. you felt unbearably hot, between the running water and coryo rutting into you it felt like heaven.
you can feel the wetness dripping down your thigh, mixing in with the water, “messy girl, aren’t you?” your hands dug into his shoulders almost painfully, “jump up.” wrapping your legs around of his waist, his hands cupped your ass. his pace is unbelievably brutal, “such a bitch to me, making me look weak.”
you shook your head, “didn’t mean to, didn’t mean to i swear.” you mewl, hot tears streaming down your cheeks, as coryo lets out throaty groans.
“stop crying.”
“i can’t, you feel so good!”
“stop crying or i’m not gonna let you cum.” his hand tightened around your throat, cutting off your airway. the dizziness paired with his thrusts inside of you was absolutely delicious. he let up only to mark you before returning to it.
“not yet," his grip around your throat tightened as coryo continued thrusted into you, obviously chasing his own high. "you'll cum when i do.” please cum. you thought, please please please.
his hips slowed down as he groaned, “fuck, all for me yeah? all grown up, aren’t you baby?” your nails marked up his back as he grunted, the hot water seemed to make the fresh marks hurt all the more. coriolanus loved the stinging, almost as much as he loved your cunt.
“cum, cum for me.” you weren’t sure if your release came before or after, but all you felt was unwavering pleasure and relief. you rested your head in the crook of his neck, you were so exhausted. “you did good, so good y/n.” coryo praised you as he pressed kisses to your forehead.
“let’s get you cleaned up yeah?”
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warnings: again, smut. put me in a fucking hospital.
word count: 5.5k
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You were, by far, Jonathan Crane's least favorite student.
You knew it, and it was complete bullshit. You were always on time, always in every class, and always completed the work. You had always had such good grades in every class, but not with him.
While not giving you the worst grade imaginable, you were never able to get over an A-, which pissed you the fuck off. Obviously, to any other normal student studying psychology, they'd take the A-, but not you.
And again, nothing over an A-. There was the frequent B+, sometimes B, and when you really pissed him off he would go as low as a B-.
You've done everything you could to get him to like you. You would ask questions, clearly put extra effort into the homework, and even applied to laboratory studies that he ran. You hated not being liked.
However, at this point in the year, you had given up on trying. You still did everything you were supposed to do, because you wanted a good grade, but you hadn't bothered participating or showing any interest anymore. You had decided to focus more on your other classes. Due to this, you had been working late into the night, causing you to be exhausted for your 8 AM lectures with Crane.
You were exhausted, trying to pay attention. Your head hurt so much for looking at a screen for so long last night.
Crane is flipping through a slideshow, and you find yourself dozing. It's not that this stuff bored you, you had just already learned it back when you took AP Psych your sophomore year of high school.
You snap back into reality when you hear your name being called.
Crane is singling you out with an annoyed expression on his face. You turn red because everyone, all 400 other people in the class, are staring at you.
"I'm sorry. Is this boring you?" He puts his hands on his hips.
"No-" You begin.
You're stammering. You normally don't have such a rough time with public speaking, but being downright exhausted and being singled out for nearly falling asleep in class is extremely embarrassing.
He pauses for a moment and stares you down.
You feel as if you were naked, as if you were completely exposed to him. You didn't like him looking at you like that, like he was taking into account every imperfection.
"As I was saying..."
Thank god.
He resumes to what he was talking about before and you're more alert, heart pumping full of humiliation. You're taking notes now, typing quickly and probably annoyingly loud (you can tell because he keeps shooting you small glares every time you hit the spacebar).
Finally, the hour is up and he reminds everyone about the homework due that Friday. You collect your stuff and head out the door. You don't realize, but he watches you leave.
Everything you do irks him.
Maybe it was because your first paper challenged his psychological beliefs, or because your intelligence challenged him in general. But literally everything about you pisses him off.
Your loud typing, your questions that challenges his lectures, how you turn everything in on time, how you flawlessly converse with the other students. He is so desperately waiting for you to slip up.
As previously stated, you were putting less effort than before into his class. He picked up on this. You were turning your papers and chapter readings in the last minute, you weren't asking questions, and you were even falling asleep.
You had three days to complete a portion of the assignments given. You completely forgot about it.
Due to your tiredness and your weakening desire to try for the class, you had forgotten to write down the homework in a planner that you always checked daily.
Crane is a quick grader, and usually he always grades your homework first; more specifically, as soon as you turn it in.
You realized you didn't do the work as soon as you woke up that morning for your 8 AM class. You had never ever missed an assignment. Ever. And you had no time to do it and make it to his class on time. You were freaking the fuck out.
It's okay. Maybe he hasn't graded it yet.
But no. He was such a strict grader. He was harsh.
Whatever. You may as well hope for the best.
To distract yourself from your predicament, you talk to the boy who sits next to you in the class. It's just smalltalk about the workload and about an upcoming test.
You stop talking when Crane clears his throat. You shift back in your seat and open your laptop.
"It's a Friday. It's 8 AM," Crane begins. You think this is going to be the introduction of a psychological speech. "For all 399 of you that did your homework last night, go enjoy your Friday morning."
People being looking around and whispering, not sure if this is a trick, but you know it's not.
You're freaking out. Your heart is racing and you cannot believe that he would actually do this to you. Usually teachers will just give you a bad grade and call it that, but to single you out and have the entire class leave except for you is an all time low.
"I'm not messing with you," Crane continues. "Go. You know who you are."
He's looking at you dead in the eye and you stay put as people slowly get up to leave, looking around to make sure others are doing the same. You avoid his gaze, looking at your computer screen.
Soon enough, everyone is out of the large lecture room, some looking back to see the one person who didn't do their work.
Once the door is shut, and everyone is completely out of sight, Crane locks both of the doors and looks up at you.
"Are you deliberately trying to fail my class?" He questions. "I thought you wanted to be outstanding."
You can't find words to say. He scoffs and moves to his desk, shuffling through papers and bringing out a decently large stack to over to you. It feels like hours pass by as he walks up the steps to you and drops them onto your desk.
You look at them, confused.
"This is the homework that was due at midnight." He explains.
"It's never so much..." You stammer. You can feel his hatred burning into your skin.
"It's what's due next Wednesday, Friday, and the following week too. Let's see if you can get this done by.... hm," He checks his watch. "By the end of the period?"
"All of this?" Your eyes widen.
"When's your next class?" He asks.
"You're my only one today." You continue to avoid his eye contact.
"Then you can stay." He says. "Until you finish all the work."
"But-"
"I can't trust that you'll do it." Crane says, taking a step back from you. "You need to complete it. In front of me."
"Please, Professor," You try to defend yourself. "I've been-"
"I can assume what you've been doing, you've almost fallen asleep in my class." He scoffs.
You feel your cheeks heat up with embarrassment over him getting the wrong impression. Does he really think that low of you?
You take a deep breath. You'll just have to deal with this.
"Do you have a pencil?"
He grabs a black pen from his desk and looks up to you, motioning to sit in the front row. Close enough. You swallow your pride and grab your things and the stack of paper, walking down to the seats in the front.
The class itself is an hour, but it took you almost five to complete the amount of homework he gave you. The readings were long, and the quality of work was demanding. You were eager to do well, to prove yourself.
You hate that he hated you.
His eyes were on you the entire time you did your work. The silence was loud, but you pushed through it. You got three weeks of homework done, and proudly put the stack back onto his desk.
"I'll see you Monday, Professor," you smile, then walk away.
After that, you tried harder; harder than you tried compared to every other class you took. You did this, not to get him to like you- but to get back at him with the fact that you knew your shit; you were a good student. You sat in the front, did side research, and spent nights studying for his endless quizzes. And he wanted to fail you to make you stop what you were doing, but you were getting all the answers right and you both knew that. He wouldn't want you taking anything to the next level.
With you in the front, it made it harder for him to not be distracted by you. Mid speech he would find himself locking eyes with you, disrupting his words and leaving him stammering for a brief moment. Ever since you've upped the eye contact, you've gained more control of the situation.
You arrived in class that Wednesday; the situation in which Crane forced you to stay and do two weeks worth of work in front of him occurred around three weeks ago. You're sitting in the front in between two empty seats; no one likes to sit in the front in Crane's class. It's usually only filled with around three to four people. Crane isn't in class yet, which is weird considering he's always there early, before anyone else even gets there. The class is almost about to begin and he's never been late.
Soon enough, it's one minute after the class is supposed to start and he's still not there. You start feeling antsy, wondering where he is.
Finally, he walks in; two minutes after class is supposed to start. So unlike him.
He places his briefcase on the desk and begins setting up his computer while everyone takes out something to take notes with.
"Now, you all know what I specialize in, I hope," He states, not breaking eye contact with his computer.
He specialized in phobias. Apart from dedicating his time to teaching you, he was a therapist mainly for fears.
"I'm sure we all know what exposure therapy is, correct?" He asks. Pretty much the whole class nods in unison. "Good. For those of you not on the same page, it's the type of therapy which someone is exposed to their fear or trauma."
He begins flipping through his slideshow, giving more and more information and lecturing about it, but you can't help but notice it's an almost bias review.
You're left with homework to write a review on some boring documentary on the history of exposure therapy and a pretty long excerpt of the textbook you all were reading.
So, you did your work and followed all of the instructions. You wrote a review on exposure therapy.
The next Monday, you get to class and you sit in the front row. There's a big stack of paper on Crane's desk, and you assuming that you're getting a pop-quiz, but no, that's not the case.
Crane's waiting for everyone with his shoulder rested on the large stack of papers. Once the time hits 8, he begins.
"I printed out all of your outlines," He begins. "I've made some comments and given some feedback. We'll spend the class working on them."
He starts calling out names and one by one, people receive their papers. You're sort of anxious- you left a pretty negative review on exposure therapy, something that he seemed so passionate about.
"Y/N Y/L/N." He says, saying your voice with more of an annoyed tone than the other students. You get up and grab your paper from his hands, tugging harder due to his firm grip. Clearing his throat, he continues calling out the following names. You go back to your seat, nervous to look at the paper. When you sit and look at it, your stomach dropped.
There's nothing on the front page. Then you look at the second.
See me after class.
There is literally nothing but a see me after class.
Oh my god.
What did I do?
Was he offended at all by what was written? Surely, that wasn't your intention... yes, you wanted to piss him off, but you had some respect for him. You didn't want to actually maybe- make him insecure about his work?
Class seemed to take hours to go by; you didn't even know what to do about your paper. He gave no other feedback other than to see him after class. How were you supposed to work with that?
You looked around at your classmates typing away. You're annoyed that he actually helped them.
See me after class.
At least give me feedback on my fucking paper.
Everyone then realized the time and began to pack up. Crane stood up from his desk and took his glasses off.
"Remember, papers are due Friday!" He manages to get out before people start heading out the door.
You put your things in your bag, trying to act out to your classmates as if you were leaving. You felt so embarrassed. You hated how he kept embarrassing you and how he had the power to do that. It was infuriating. You felt him staring at you as you packed your stuff up, moving slower, nervous that he would call you out.
You took your time, though, waiting till everyone was out of the room.
With everyone else there, you felt so confident. You were one of the smart ones and you at least had witnesses, but alone with him? You were completely inferior. He could quite literally ruin your life with a bad grade and could easily tarnish your image, being the head of Arkham and all that.
"I found your paper quite interesting," He says, emphasizing quite.
"I'm sorry-" you begin. "I didn't mean to offend you."
"Offend me?" He scoffs. "You think you offended me?"
"I just- I know this is what you do, right?" You stammer.
"I'm interested in your point of view." He says. "About the pain, how it's long term. I'm interested as to why you seem so against it."
You shrug.
"What's your biggest fear, Y/N?" He asks you. "What is it? Failure?"
"I'm not trying to fail."
"Oh, yes, you've proven that." He clicks his tongue. "Sitting in the front, turning things in quickly, wearing shorter skirts. Don't think I don't notice what you're doing."
"What?"
"You write intensely about the struggle that people with PTSD-"
"Wait," you interrupt him. "What did you say?"
"I'm trying to discuss with you what you've written."
"Professor, my clothing choices have nothing to do with me wanting to do well in this class," you say. Now you're offended.
Instead of apologizing, which is what you think any decent person would do, he looks you up and down and scoffs.
"You're wearing tights."
"What?"
"Surely, those must be uncomfortable. You're not wearing those to satisfy yourself," he says.
You grow red, and angry.
He keeps humiliating you.
"Who are you trying to impress?"
"Will you stop?" you groan in frustration. "Why don't you just let me get by like you let everyone else get by? I do everything you ask!"
"I want to know who you're trying to impress."
"I'm not trying to impress anyone," you hiss, finally looking up at his crystal eyes.
You know it's disrespectful, but you turn to walk away and to leave.
"No, no. We're not done."
You ignore him, walking towards the door, but he quickly beats you to it, shutting it and locking you in.
"I said we're not done." He said, completely composed. "Sit."
"I want to leave."
"Your biggest fear is failure, yes?" He questions. You don't nod or shake your head, but it is pretty much true; you hate failing. You need to succeed and be good at everything you do. "Sit. I can very much make that fear come true."
"I do everything," you repeat. "Everything. I do it on time, I'm here always, I'm prepared for everything."
"Can you just fucking-" He pushes you down onto the seat next to his desk. "Sit?"
You weren't expecting him to physically force you to sit down, but you could pick up on the pent up frustration he had with you.
"The off the cut sweater, no bra-" He points out.
You weren't wearing a bra. You were surprised he had picked up on the fact- you could've been wearing a strapless, but no. He was right.
"Are you even wearing underwear?" He whispers.
You're flushed.
What the fuck was going on?
You thought he hated you.
And yeah, you knew he was an attractive man, that's what made this whole thing pretty exciting, but you never thought you would be sat down with him leaning over you saying things like this.
"Let me see."
"Professor?"
He grabs you off the chair and pushes you onto his desk, spreading your legs for you. Everything was moving too quickly; this all felt like a fever dream.
He tugs at the middle of your tights, ripping them open to expose your- and he was right- bare pussy. He lets out a chuckle.
"You're not trying to impress anyone?" He questions, again, peering up at you.
You try moving your thigh to cover yourself, but he forcefully keeps them open.
"Who was that boy you used to sit next to... Tim, is it?"
To be honest, you really didn't know that kids name. He was just someone you sat next to out of habit since you had picked that seat the first day of classes. But you hadn't been sitting with him for weeks at that point.
"Is Tim who you're trying to impress?"
"No!" You argue, still trying to fight the grip of his hand off your thigh. "I told you... I'm not trying to impress anyone."
"Hm." He says, placing two fingers on exactly the right spot of your clit, slowly rubbing in circles. . "You're not even trying to impress me?"
You stay silent, for a brief moment.
"Not in this way..."
But it's past that point now. He's already touching you, rubbing faster, and your exposed pussy is laid out right in front of his face. You're embarrassed and self conscious. He's too close for comfort.
"Yeah?"
The fingers once on your clit are now entering you. You still can't comprehend the situation.
But for him, he was putting you in your place. It was enough of the looks in class, the semi sexual and revealing clothing, the obvious need for his approval and to show him she was as smart- maybe even smarter than him himself.
"Is that why you're letting me touch you like this?" He asks, using the two fingers to pump your pussy.
It's out of your control but you're getting wetter the longer and faster he fingers you. It's beginning to show, beginning to drip down his fingers and onto his wrists. He notices this, then stops and looks.
"Disgusting," He huffs before licking his fingers clean.
"That's disgusting," You repeat at him, glaring a little, but you can't help but want his finger- more of him back inside you. You feel empty, desperate for his hands back on you.
"I don't see you asking me to stop."
You're silent, again.
He smiles, kneeling back down and spreading your legs open again, this time with a more forceful grip. He doesn't use his fingers this time, devouring you with his hot mouth and basically digging in.
He was really good at this. To be fair, no one had ever actually eaten you out, but you had never felt anything like it. He moves his fingers towards you again and fucks you with them as he sucks and licks at your clit. He was freakishly good. You felt something drip down your thigh; you didn't know if you were sweating or if you were fucking leaking. By the sound of it, probably the second one.
He removes his fingers and dives deep into your pussy more, making obscure sounds as he does so. He stops and looks up at you.
"Take your shirt off. I want to see your tits," he demands.
You comply; he's already seen a lot.
"Fuck, they're perfect." He says, now standing over you, playing with them and poking and twisting at your hardened nipple. He's pushing his hardened clothed dick into your bare pussy, giving you some friction has he sucks on your neck and plays with your nipples.
He grabs your hips and flips you over, putting you on your stomach and leaning you over the desk.
He kneels back down, eating your pussy again; he can't get enough of it. He can't get enough of the small whines escaping your throat and the way you leak and how you shake when it feels good- or when the pleasure becomes too much.
He adds his fingers in again, this time three, and you let out a louder, but not too loud, moan than usual.
"Professor-"
"You can take it." He assures you. "You better take it. If you can't take this how can you take my cock?"
You just weren't used to it- you had been fucked, but not for so long. He keeps licking and devouring your clit while pumping in and out of you. You feel so full- on the brink. You feel hot, and god you feel good. You don't even realize it, but you're riding his mouth and his fingers.
"You know, I wasn't going to let you come," Crane begins between breaths, keeping his face close to your pussy so you could still feel him. "But now that I think about it... I want you cum drunk on my dick. I wanna make you cum over and over again until you're a fucking mess."
He goes back to sloppily and messily eating you out again. It was so dirty; the noise, what was leaking out of you. You then felt that familiar feeling and you couldn't stop it; no matter how wrong this felt or how humiliated and exposed you felt, you couldn't stop yourself from moaning like a mess and cumming all over his mouth.
You needed a second to recover, but he stood up and grinded his clothed dick against you. You weren't ready for the friction, wincing over the contact with you sensitive clit. He grabbed your neck and pulls your back to him, kissing you, continuing to grind.
He unbuttons his pants and undoes his boxers, his large thick cock springing out, begging to be touched. He pushes one of your legs up onto the desk to give him better access to you.
"You're fucking soaked," He says as he teases himself some more, collecting what's came out of you as some lubricant.
He keeps rubbing your clit and the outside with his dick, back and forth. It feels good, but it's not enough. He pushes harder with his dick on your clit, continuing to hump you.
"Professor, please," you look back at him, trying to guilt him into giving in and fucking you, but it's not that easy.
"Shut up, and let me take my time." He says. He continues this for a little, before getting a new idea. "I want you to cum on my cock without me fucking you."
"What?"
He pulls you towards him then on his lap on the chair next to his desk.
"Grind on it." He demands, holding you in place by your hips. "Get it soaked."
You hesitate, but he's impatient. He pushes you down and moves your hips for you until you begin to do it with him. You grind your pussy against his cock, stimulating your clit once more. It didn't feel as good as his mouth, and god it probably didn't feel as good as his dick would feel inside you, but it felt good. And you were so fucking horny, you were on the brink of cumming again.
"Yeah, yeah, you got it," he praised you, rocking your hips back and forth. He digs his nails into your hips, definitely leaving some cuts in your skin, but you didn't care. You were so close. He begins to bounce up, pretending to thrust into you, adding to your pleasure. "That's it, you- oh fuck, yes, cum on my fucking dick."
You're dripping onto him as you ride out your high, clenching around nothing. It seems to last for a while, wrapped up in all the pleasure combined with his dirty talk.
He angles his cock towards your entrance and pushes into you- he feels hot and he's sensitive due to teasing himself. But no- he doesn't want to cum yet. He wants to put you in your fucking place. And even if he does cum, he has no issue continuing and even fucking a baby into you. Then, you'd have to walk around with the shame.
He gently picks you up, but then harshly slams you up and down repeatedly onto his cock. You've had no time to readjust after cumming a second time, and you were extremely sensitive.
"Slower, professor, please," You cry, burying your face into his shoulder. "It hurts..."
"Shut the fuck up."
He grabs you by the neck and pounds up into you, rubbing your clit as well to add to the sensation.
Yes, it feels good, but it's so overwhelming you can't help but tear up. Crane notices this and it goes straight to his head.
"Are you fucking crying?" He scoffs. "Fucking crying for me?"
He picks you up, keeping you firmly attached to his dick, and throws you over the desk again. He's fucking you deeper and at an animalistic pace; like he fucking needs this.
"Keep crying for me. Keep fucking crying."
He harshly grips your tits, twisting your nipple in the process.
"Fucking perfect tits, perfect pussy, perfect everything. You fucking strive for perfection- but you're letting me fucking ruin you. Is this how far you'd go for a good grade?" He laughs, fingers deep in your clit.
You can only moan in response, but this doesn't satisfy him.
"Fucking answer me."
"Yes," you cry out.
"Yeah, you're just a fucking whore who'd sleep her way to the top if that's what it took." He says, tugging your hair back, your sweaty bodies pressed closer together.
His words are filthy, but you're fucking cumming again.
He's laughing, mocking you for doing so.
"You fucking like being treated like a bitch, don't you?" He says, fucking you through your third orgasm. You don't know how he's not tired. As you expect, he doesn't give you a fucking break. You're worn out at this point; almost numb.
"Professor, I don't know-"
"You don't know if you can keep going?" He questions. "Yeah, you can. I'll fucking make you keep going. What was that... your third orgasm? Let me see if I can double that."
"Professor..."
"I'll stop when you give me three more."
You feel like you're going to pass out; the pleasure had become too much, but you were so fucking sensitive that a fourth one had come quickly. Your pussy was so swollen and red, but he had not gotten off of you.
"You're fucking..." He brings you back to the chair and places you on top of him. "You're fucking leaking all over me, fucking hell. So wet... do you hear yourself?"
You could hear yourself. It was disgusting. It was filthy.
"Aren't you embarrassed?" He asks. He slows down his pace, and you know he's teasing you. "Embarrassed that you're whoring yourself out to me like this? To a professor that so clearly disliked you? This is what you do for my approval."
He slows his pace some more.
"Would you do this for any other professor, Y/N? Let them fuck your pussy till you have nothing left to give? Bounce on their cock the way you do for me?"
"No, professor," you shake your head, trying to bounce faster but he keeps your hips in place, restricting you. He had succeeded- made you cum drunk and fucked you stupid, but this wasn't enough. He needed more. "No, no, only you. I'd only do this for you."
You're squirming around on his dick. He's stopped moving at this point, just staying in you.
"Stop fucking moving around. Don't you want to impress me?"
"Have I not?" You begin to regain some of your strength with this somewhat of a break he was giving you. "Have I not impressed you, professor?"
You give him puppy eyes as you gain some control of the situation, his grip loosing and you bouncing on his cock at a pace you like.
"I want to impress you, professor," you say seductively. "I want to- fuck!"
You start chasing your high again, you didn't even realize that you'd ever be able to cum this many times.
"Fuck!" You repeat. Crane is letting you take control, enjoying the show of you riding his cock, using him for your pleasure. "Do you like this, professor? Do you like when I fucking bounce on your dick like this?"
You had never heard yourself like this, or ever expected to talk like this. You had never felt so confident.
"Have you imagined this professor?" You continue. He's obviously at a loss for words, not expecting this side of you. "Have you imagined fucking me? Have you imagined bending me over your desk and eating me out till I came all over your face? My tits? Putting me in my fucking place?"
His hands found your hips again and he's helping you ride his cock. He's loving the words coming from your mouth.
"God, I think you wanted this more than I did," you laugh. You're so close. You wanted him to talk, but his reactions to your words were enough for you. "Make me cum again, professor, please. I- fuck!"
He's pushing into you and bouncing you up and down quickly and you're riding out your fifth orgasm.
He pulls you off of him and lays you out on the desk again, licking up your sore pussy. He hums while doing this, telling you how you taste so good. You're so- so sensitive, though, and you can't help but cumming on his tongue again not even seconds later, letting out a string of incoherent words.
That's six.
You look at him, but he's positioning himself in you.
"You said six-"
"I say a lot of things. I want you to cum on my cock again." He says, kissing your neck. "Last time. I promise."
He pumps into you, at a softer, but still quick pace. You feel so incredibly numb, but he still manages to work you up quickly while fondling your breasts and pressing hot kisses into your neck.
"Ah- fuck." He pants, fucking himself into you. "Fuck... gonna cum in you. Want you to fucking carry me around for the rest of the fucking day."
You don't object- your hearing was probably a little impaired at this point.
"Yeah, you want that, don't you. It's like a fucking award to you."
He's holding you closer now. You both are so sweaty and sticky.
You're about to cum again, but he grabs your throat tightly.
"Fucking wait for me. Don't be impatient."
As hard as it is, you listen to him. He speeds up, becoming sloppy before he cries, "Fuck, cum! Cum all over my fucking- ahhh, yes, fuck."
He shoots hot loads into you as you clench around him, milking more out of him. He doesn't stop, continuing to fuck you until every last bit of his seed has marked you. Even after he's done, he gets a few more strokes in before he pulls out, showing the combination of you and him leaking out of your pussy. He pushes you onto the floor and presents his dick in front of him.
"Clean it."
You obey, wrapping your mouth on his cock and licking away the filth that the two of you made. He groans and pulls you off of him.
"You'll get me hard again." He says.
He puts all his clothes back on and hands you your sweater. Your nipples are hard, poking through them now.
"I look forward to your next draft of your review." Crane says calmly, as if what just happened didn't happen.
"You- um..." you stammer, brushing your fingers through your hair. "You didn't give me any notes."
"I didn't?" He questioned. You shook your head. "Well, stay again after class next session. I'll go over it, personally, with you."
"Oh." You blush. "This wasn't a one time thing?"
"Y/N..." Crane looks at the floor. "I'm your professor."
You felt awkward. Of course it was a one time thing; how could it not be?
But then he looks back up at you.
"You don't want to fail my class, do you?"
3K notes · View notes
natalievoncatte · 20 days
Text
The yawn stretched Lena’s jaw to the point that she felt like a cat, baring her fangs. Naturally, it prompted a Kara Danvers Pout, which was utterly devastating. Kara looked at her over the top of her drink cup, straw still pursed in her delicate pink lips as she frowned slightly.
“How long have you been awake?”
“I had a half hour nap this morning,” Lena sighed.
She’d been in the office for three days, but she didn’t admit that.
“Leeeenaaaaaaa,” Kara said, drawing her name out into a gentle rebuke. “You promised me you’d stop doing that to yourself. I’m taking you home.”
Lena’s heart skipped and Kara abruptly jerked upright, briefly glancing at her. Lena hated when that happened, when her body betrayed her. Kara meant escort her home; Lena’s thoroughly tired mind had supplied another scenario, one where Kara carried her onto the bed, relieved her of her clothes and dove between her legs, but that was never going to happen. Lena let out a long sigh of resignation, trying to be satisfied with best-friendship.
She hoped Kara hadn’t suddenly developed telepathy.
If you took me home I’d never leave. I could make love to you for a hundred years.
Kara smiled back at Lena’s wistful look. “I mean it.”
“Okay. I can come back to it tomorrow. Besides, I’m too full of grease and cheese to stay awake. Should we…”
Lena never finished her sentence. There was a crackle in the air, a sudden wet smell of ozone, and the thunderous boom that made her ears ring.
Kara flashed in front of her at super-speed, yanking off her glasses and tossing them on the couch in a smooth motion.
Hovering in the middle of her office was some ramshackle contraption resembling a mechanical eye about the size of a basketball that scanned Kara with a faint purple energy ray.
“Kara Danvers. Supergirl. I am Zeglos, Regent of the Alotian Republic. I am calling to you from the home of my people, located in what is to you a subatomic realm we call Universe Q. We need your help, you are our only hope. The invaders are slaughtering us and razing our home. There is no time.”
Kara glanced back at Lena. “I’ll help if I can. Let me-“
“There is no time. You must come with me now.”
“Wait, hold on a second-“
The machine flashed, thrumming as it powered up, and blasted here with a wave of light that surrounded them both, and then in a crackling boom they both vanished, leaving behind the ozone smell and a faint impression of Kara’s boot heels in the carpet.
Lena stared into the empty space for a moment, then shot to her feet, snatching the phone off her desk, where it had lain ignored since Kara walked into the room.
She called Alex, shocked at the blubbering panic in her own voice. Within a few minutes, everyone was there, piling into the room. Lena warded them off from the spot where Kara had stood. Alex was cold and calm, her voice clinical, and she immediately began issuing orders. J’onn took Lena aside and gently asked her probing questions in the manner of an old detective, coaxing every meager detail of the event out of her.
Within half an hour, Brainy and Lena had set up all sorts of equipment around the room, scanning, hoping to find some energy signature or other clue that could enable them to bring Kara back from wherever she’d been taken.
It proved fruitless. They tried everything.
Minutes stretched into hours. Lena was exhausted, heavy with fatigue.
“Go home, get some sleep,” said Alex. “We can’t help her if we pass out on the floor.”
“I’ll sleep here.”
She did, throwing a thin blanket over herself on the couch. It was Alex, not Lena, who cleaned up the Big Belly Burger mess. Lena slept fitfully, showered in the en-suite attached to her office, and changed into an old hoodie that she kept there and wore when no one was looking.
It wasn’t hers. Threadbare, a maroon color faded to a soft red, the back still emblazoned with a cracked and fading Midvale Mathletes Club logo, it was Kara’s. Lena had snatched it from Kara’s sofa and put it on one night when she was feeling bold and then, as now, felt surrounded by it, the oversized garment swaddling her.
And it smelled like Kara, just enough. Kara had stared at her intently for a moment when she took it that night but said nothing, a wistful sad look on her face before the moment was broken by Wynn’s bad joke at the table. Wynn was gone now, but the hoodie remained, just as it had remained when they were fighting, when she thought she’d never see Kara again. She’d worn it then and cried herself to sleep in it.
Just like now.
A day became two. Then three. Five. Lena tried everything, pursued every theory. They called in every favor, human and alien. Brainy tried to send messages to the future. Nia dreamed fruitless dreams. Alex paced like a caged animal and Kelly kept the peace, keeping them all fed, making sure everyone slept, talking things out whenever tempers flared.
Nothing worked.
Lena even tried praying, something she hadn’t done since the last time she was in a small church in Ireland. It didn’t work this time, either.
Lena was seated next to Brainy on the couch, going over a design for a new device to try to follow what was by now a thoroughly cold trail. Alex stood at the balcony door, staring out into a slashing summer rain squall that buffeted the glass with distant thunder and gusts of wind.
The ozone smell tickled Lena’s nose and she looked up, just as Kara took a stumbling step out of nowhere, appearing in her office with an utterly bewildered look on her face.
“Kara?”
Alex snapped round, adding her voice to the chorus. “Kara?”
Kara stared at her sister, open-mouthed, tears welling in her eyes.
“Alex?” she said. “Alex, you’re alive? How is that possible?”
“Alive? Why wouldn’t I be?”
“Kara!” Lena cried, her voice ragged in her throat.
At the sound of her voice, Kara snapped around, eyes wide. Her knees buckled and she sagged, almost falling. She stumbled forward as Lena stood and they fell into each other, Lena hurling herself, reckless, into an embrace that revealed too much. She almost climbed Kara, all but throwing her legs around her as well as her arms as she buried her face in the Kryptonian’s neck.
“Oh God. Oh Rao. I thought you would all be gone. I begged them to let me leave but they wouldn’t let me go, I had to…”
“Kara?” Alex asked, cautiously. “Why would we be gone?”
Kara barely seemed to hear her as she gently twined her fingers in Lena’s hair and wrapped her powerful arm around Lena’s waist, encircling and shielding her.
“How long has it been?”
“About a week,” Lena choked out. “I was so scared.”
“A week?” Kara blurted. “It’s only been a week here?”
Alex put a reassuring hand on Kara’s back, standing next to them. “Yeah, you were taken on Tuesday, kiddo. It’s Wednesday, the 17th.”
Kara stared past Lena, resting her chin on the shorter woman’s head, and began to sob with relief.
“Kara?” said Alex.
“Time dilation,” said Brainy.
“They told me time would pass slower up here but I didn’t believe them. I’ve been gone for… for…”
“It’s okay, Kara,” Lena whispered. “You’re okay, you’re back.”
“Eighty seven years, four months, and eighteen days,” Kara sobbed. “It’s been so long, I thought you were all dead.”
Alex stiffened. “Kara. Oh my God.”
Kara buried her face in Lena’s hair and breathed her in, shuddering. “I’d given up. All that kept me going was hoping I could see you again. This is a gift. A gift. I love you all so much.”
Kara still held her, rocking slightly, her big shoulders shaking with powerful sobs.
“Kara,” Lena whispered. “Kara, it’s okay.”
“I love you,” Kara blurted. “I love you. It’s okay if you don’t love me back, I just need to tell you, I have to tell you. All I could think about down there is how stupid I was and how stupid I’ve been and how none of the reasons I never told you made any sense,” she sucked in a breath as if she’d briefly forgotten how, “I love you, I love you, I love you.”
There could be no mistaking her intent. She seethed with it, it radiated from her very bones. Lena hugged her hard, crushing her with all her might as if to crawl inside her.
“God, Kara, I’ve dreamed of hearing you say that. I love you too. Let’s… mmmph!”
Kara was kissing her. Lena’s brain briefly froze, then she realized the full magnitude of what was happening. Kara was kissing her. Kara was kissing her. Then Lena was kissing her back. There was so much in it, need and lust and adoration and an unbelievable desperation, but above all love. Lena felt her heart open as if hadn’t in a long time, like a flower unfolding to receive the nurturing warmth of morning sun.
“I’ve been waiting for this for so long,” Kara whispered when they finally broke and Lena again could breathe.
“Let me take you home,” said Lena.
531 notes · View notes
lizzieolseniskinda · 8 days
Text
LOGAN HOWLETT - my darling
x FEM!reader (POC!reader)
(requests open)
SUMMARY: you feel the end of your relationship coming with logan.
WORD COUNT: 1071
GENRE: angsty-ishhh
CONTENT WARNING: english is not my first language, i love jean but there’s jean slander here sooo…
listen to 'darling' from montell fish for better experience <3.
PROOFREAD (16 SEPTEMBER)
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‘are you still in love, my darlin'? (ooh, ooh)
did you fall out of love, my darlin'? (ooh, ooh)’
you were pacing in the hallway, the heavy silence of the mansion pressing down on you as you count the days in your head. fourteen. it’s been two weeks. two weeks since logan disappeared, two weeks since you’ve felt his touch. and now, after what feels like an eternity, you catch the sound of his voice. soft and tender, but it’s not just someone.
you froze at the corner, and felt your heart drop to your stomach. he’s with her. jean. they were standing close, almost too close. their voices too low to hear but their proximity telling a story that you just didn’t want to hear. your breath catches in your throat, and you bite down hard on the inside of your cheeks to stop the tears from flowing.
he used to look at you like you were his anchor, the one thing that kept him grounded in this world, kept him sane. and now? now you were wondering if he ever even thinks of you.
you couldn’t take your eyes off them, off the way he stood so easily beside her and talking as if he hasn’t been avoiding you for days. you hate that it’s her, you always knew there was something too deep of a connection with them. and you actually liked jean.
is he even still yours?
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‘fighting on and on and on and on and on and on for what? (ooh, ooh)
i’ve been goin', goin', goin', goin', goin' on, my love (ooh, ooh)
through with it (through with it)
please don't run away
from me’
it felt as if you’d been fighting - to hold on, to keep logan from falling out of love with you. like no matter how hard you try, he’ll just keep drifting further and further away. and it was so exhausting. the endless push and pull, the wondering and waiting. for what? what were you even holding on to? you kept telling yourself that you could fix this, that there’s something you’ve done wrong, something that made him pull away in the first place. maybe it was your fault. maybe if you’d been different? less needy, less vulnerable, he’d still be here, still looking at you the way he used to. maybe if you just changed yourself.
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‘my love, still stay
don't leave
are you cryin’ out?
can you hear me now?’
it’s like you’re invisible when you were with him. every time you would try to talk, to reach him, and it’s as if your voice just fades into the background. you can’t remember the last time he looked at you with real attention, with that intensity his eyes used to have. but when jean speaks, it’s so different. he stops, listens.
every word from her has his complete focus. it stings, the way his gaze lingers on her while you stand there, forgotten, your words barely even reaching his ears.
you swallow the lump in your throat and decided to try again, maybe today would be different. “logan?” you pause, hoping this time he’ll look at you. “what movie did you want to watch tonight? i thought we could—“
“hm? i don’t know if i can make it” he mumbles, not even bothering to look up from whatever he’s doing. his voice is distracted, distant.
“but we haven’t had a date night in two weeks—“ you start saying, trying to keep your voice steady, but the moment you get the words out, you see jean walk by.
without a second thought, logan is already moving towards her. “jean! wait—“
your sentence hung unfinished in the air as he made his way to her. not even sparing you a glance. the emptiness that follows felt even heavier than the silence you got from him. it’s like you weren’t even there.
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‘i am here for you
i am here for you’
‘are you still in love, my darlin'? (ooh, ooh, hello, hello, hello)
did you fall out of love, my darlin'? (ooh, ooh)’
you stood by the window, staring blankly at the rain falling outside, the weight of everything pressed down on you. it felt like you were drowning in the silence, in the questions that had no answers. your heart ached, the tension in your chest never loosening. the sound of footsteps behind you broke the quiet, but you don’t turn around. not until you hear his voice.
“hey,” scott’s voice is soft and careful, like he already knew what you’re feeling. “i noticed you’ve been.. off lately.”
you managed a weak smile, but it never reached your eyes. “yeah, i guess.”
there’s a long pause before he spoke again, “it’s logan, isn’t it?”
you finally look at him, and the understanding in his expression catches you off guard. he’s not prying, not judging. he’s just there, going through the same thing as you.
you nodded, not trusting yourself to say anything. your throat felt tight, your heart heavy with every little thing you’ve been holding inside.
scott leans against the wall, and crossed his arms but kept his posture open and relaxed. “i get it,” he admits. “more than you know.” he doesn’t have to say it, you already knew. jean, logan. the tension between the four of you has been there since the beginning.
“i don’t know what to do anymore, scott,” you start, your voice barely a whisper. “it feels like he’s slipping away, and i—“ you stop yourself, not sure if you want to finish that thought, in case it might come true.
scott pushed himself off the wall, moving closer. “if you ever need to talk, i’m here. i know what it’s like to feel invisible. to watch someone you care about drift toward someone else,” he swallows hard, his jaw tightening for a moment before he relaxes again. “so if you ever need to vent or just… not be alone. i’m here for you.”
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‘jamie
do you still love me?
jamie
why'd you go and leave?’
you sit alone in your room, the late afternoon sun casted long shadows on the walls. the clock on your nightstand ticks away in the stillness, a steady reminder of the time passing by. you’ve grown accustomed to the way logan’s absence has become a painful routine, a reminder that he’s drifting further and further from you. it’s as if every passing day brings you closer to the inevitable.
the silence was defeating, filled with the unsolved reality you’ve been trying to ignore. every day felt like a countdown, and you could almost see the end of your relationship approaching you with a certain look on logan’s face, the one that says everything without needing words. the one look that will end it all.
that day will come, you know it and he knows it. everyone knows it. and when it does, you’ll have to face it, count the days that have passed, and try to make something of it right now. hoping that, somehow the end won’t be as painful as you fear.
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‘and I'm finally lettin' you go
i’m finally lettin' you go
i’m finally lettin' you go
lettin' my control’
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474 notes · View notes
improbable-outset · 8 months
Text
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📄 𝐒𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐁𝐢𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐲
Miguel O’Hara x Fem!Reader
𝐀𝐎3 | 𝐌𝐲 𝐖𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐏𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐭𝐬 | 𝐒𝐩𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐞 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭
𝐒𝐜𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐬𝐭 𝐇𝐮𝐬𝐛𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢���𝐭
𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 1.7k
𝐓𝐖 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐂𝐖: Married couple, smut, lactation kink, breastfeeding, Cunnilingus, kissing. MINORS DNI!🔞
𝐒𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: After you gave birth to your first daughter, Miguel spends the night admiring the changes that motherhood has done to your body.
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The apartment finally hushed after hours of crying and whining. You finally put your baby to sleep, rocking her gently in your arms.
You gently placed her in the crib, taking one quick glance at her peaceful expression. A testimony of your growing family and your shared love with Miguel.
Her cheeks were plump, and she had crimson eyes and talons that mirrored her father’s features. However, she didn’t have the ability to control when they appeared— usually she was excited or agitated— so you would often have to give her mittens in public.
You checked the baby camera was fitted properly and the temperature of the room was okay before dimming the lights and exiting the nursery quietly.
There was a sense of solace that shrouded you as you made your way to the bedroom.
It had been two whole days you were home alone while Miguel was probably in another dimension. It was hard to predict when he'd come back home and the longer he was out, the more your heart yearned.
But the feeling quickly vanished as you saw a familiar figure outside your bedroom window.
Miguel swung into the bedroom balcony with his web before opening the balcony door to step inside. He had his full suit on but as soon as he was inside the bedroom, his mask fizzled out.
It had become a routine for him to use the balcony to get in the apartment rather than the front door to avoid getting spotted.
He ran a hand over his disheveled hair before his expression softened when he saw you. You must’ve looked exhausted because he was approaching you with caution.
“Hey you…” you closed the distance between the two of you and wrapped your arms around him. He wrapped his arms around your waist and pulled you closer.
He leaned in to kiss you deeply, making up for all those hours you were separated.
He pulled back from the kiss while still keeping his arms around you. “Is she sleeping?”
“Yeah she’s asleep. Do you wanna see her?”
“In a bit,” he said before lifting you up in his arms briefly and placing you on the bed.
This caught you by surprise.
“Mig…”
You didn’t expect him to be this handsy with you as soon as he came home. But you weren’t complaining.
“You look tired, amor. I hate leaving you alone for so long,” He said, a tenderness in his voice. His hands ran over the thighs, feeling every inch like it was his first time touching you.
“It’s all part of duty though, right? I know you always come back.” You placed a soft kiss on his cheek, sealing your words.
“I missed you. Do you have any idea how badly I wanted to feel you.” He murmured, his lips grazed over the curve of your neck.
You could feel his hands hiking up under your shirt before removing it completely. His neediness, as well as his swift movements, added to your heightened libido.
“I missed you too Mig,”
You weren't wearing a bra so your breasts, that were swollen with milk, bounced with every movement you made.
“So full…” he kissed along your chest, deliberately avoiding the nipple while caressing your sides. He couldn’t get enough of you and being separated from you for this long only made him more desperate for your presence.
“Are you gonna start rambling about how a woman produces milk?” You arched your brow inquisitively when you noticed him inspecting your breasts. You would be lying if you said you didn’t miss his biology rants.
Miguel didn’t talk much unless he needed to, but when he did, you would cherish every word that uttered from his mouth.
“I am now…” he swiped his thumb over one of your nipples, making you hiss. You were more sensitive now so you were very responsive to his minimal touches.
“Your body has developed glands and structures inside of your breast which are full of milk ducts.” As he explained this to you, some of the milk seeped out from your nipples. You shuddered in embarrassment.
“I’m sorry…that happens sometimes. I should’ve pumped out the milk before…” You said apologetically. You tried to slip off his grasp but he had a tight hold on you.
“What a mess…” he commented before giving your breast a gentle squeeze, watching more of your milk leaking down his hands.
Heat reached your cheeks as you noticed the way he was staring at the milk in fascinating.
You hissed again from his grip he had on your breast. You knew you had been hyper lactating but it was hard to predict when the milk would leak out like this.
Miguel moved his hands from your breast and over to his mouth and lapped up the milk that spilled over his knuckles.
You felt a wetness pool your panties as you watched him taste your milk. There was something enticing watching your husband drinking your milk straight from your body.
He then leaned into your breast again and inhaled your scent deeply. “We can’t let this go to waste,”
You didn’t need to think too deeply about what he meant.
Before you could even begin to speak, he licked one of your nipples, cleaning off the mess before latching his mouth around it.
The sudden sensation made you arch your back further into his mouth. You gripped onto his broad arms as he continued to suckle on your breast.
You soaked in the way he was completely indulging in your milk, his cheeks hollowing in with each suck.
You could feel your milk seeping through your nipples and into his mouth as he took his fill greedily.
After a while he released your nipple, letting out a small sigh of satisfaction. His mouth was slightly parted and his eyes were half-lidded.
You were too stunned by what had just happened and the words lodged in your throat. Miguel took your silence as an opportunity to reach for your lips and kissed you passionately.
You could taste the sweetness of your own milk from his mouth as he swiped his tongue over your lips. He pulled away, leaving you dazed.
“Did you enjoy that?” You finally asked.
“I did, we should do that more often,” The corner of his lips curved up. “But tell me, what hormones are responsible for lactation, hm?”
Again, he was asking a question and expecting an answer from you when you were dizzy with bliss and could barely speak.
It was definitely on purpose because it amused him how much of a mess he made out of you.
You tried to process his question and articulate an answer, even though you knew it was only going to feed into his ego.
“Hm…prolactin…oxytocin…” you breathed.
A grin formed on his lips, both from the state you were in and the satisfied answer you gave.
“My sweet and clever wife,”
His praise made your stomach flutter.
He hands reached over to the waist to remove your pants along with your panties, leaving you bare on the bed. As you lied on your back, you could feel his dick pressing against your clit through the digital suit as he crept closer.
He tapped on his watch and his suit pixelated away, revealing his chiseled body and his throbbing cock. The precum that was seeping from the tip was too tempting. But you forced yourself to stay grounded before you lost control in your lust.
“Miguel, I’m not on anything,” your voice was sharp with caution.
It had been too long since you both did anything intimate. Even during your pregnancy, you were focused primarily on your health and making sure your pregnancy went smoothly.
But as much as you yearned to feel Miguel inside you and the friction from his dick, you were smart enough to hold back.
You knew that you were more fertile after you gave birth, with an increased level of oestrogen, making you more susceptible to get pregnant again.
The last thing you wanted was an unexpected pregnancy when your hands were already full looking after your 5-month-old daughter.
Miguel kept his gaze at you. “You are breastfeeding,”
Your clit was throbbing, desperate for his touch. But you weren’t going to cave in.
“Better to be safe than sorry.”
Miguel lowered himself to reach for your thighs and dipped his head lower until he was facing between your legs. All you could focus on now was his exhales fanning on your soaked cunt.
“I guess we could find an alternative tonight…”
You couldn’t fully process his statement before you felt his tongue drag over your folds. The sudden contact made you clamp your legs around his head.
You reached over and ran your hands over his hair.
He knew that area was more delicate now after you gave birth. You could feel him trying to be gentle with you while eating you out.
It made your heart stutter.
But even if he was giving you a soft treatment, your senses were still firing and you could feel heat building up in your core.
“Miguel…” you moaned lowly.
He hummed against your core in response, sending a tantalising vibration through your spine.
He was trying not to flicker his tongue too deep into your cunt to avoid hurting you. Every juice that was leaking from you was quickly licked off by him.
Between your thighs, you could see him looking back up at you, watching your reaction while drinking up his fill of you and coaxing your orgasm.
It’s been a while since your pussy had any attention, causing you to be pent up with tension.
You came sooner than you anticipated, most likely from how sensitive you were. You arched your back with a long moan. Everything that squirted from your cunt was licked off from his tongue.
You were limp on the sheets, drenched in the afterglow. Your legs released their grip around Miguel's head as he pulled himself away from you. He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand.
There was a sudden sound of crying coming from the next room. Your daughter had woken up.
Miguel got himself off the bed. “I’ll get her, you stay.”
You nodded mutely, giving him the chance to bond with your daughter after two days of being without her.
He left the room but not before putting his sweat pants on. You, on the other hand, were left on the bed to catch your breath.
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𝐓𝐚𝐠𝐬: @ghost-lantern @ultravioletrayz @lazyjellyfish300 @xxsugarbonesxx @zg0nuwa @laysmt @club-danger-zone @farrowroyale @hwasoup @da-h0manb3an @animequeen4 @francesca-the-1st @montyrokz @s0fia4 @f1-hoff @alyeskathewave @princesatracionera @ssleepycenzi @coyfesh @chrishy973 @ginanet @ilovetaquitosmmmm @twistxdx @pxtched @flordelalunas @nommingonfood @fairywitch2000
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ponderingmoonlight · 8 months
Text
JJK men with a big-chested reader
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Pairings: Nanami x reader; Geto x reader (nsfw); Yuji/Sukuna x reader; Gojo x reader
Word Count: 4,4k (she's big)
Warnings: THIS IS A FIC WITH A BIG-CHESTED READER! so if this triggers you, don't read it (especially in Sukuna's part, you might get triggered when having smaller boobs so just do me a favor and don't read it instead of leaving a sassy comment), boob play in Geto's part so nsfw, in general harassment but big old fluff from your faves, not proofread bc I have my final exam tomorrow - hope you enjoy! 🤍
Special thanks to one of my moots for letting me turn her cleavage into a cover for this fic - you look STUNNING + thank you to everyone who sent me their experiences for this!
Since I'm not big-chested myself, I'm calling all my big boobie girlies to leave me a lil review about this fic - it would literally help me so much 😭
Click here to get to the small-chested version
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Nanami Kento
You sigh to yourself, too exhausted to even stand up straight anymore. Today was like a trip to hell and back. All those fucking curses, the death, the horror. You rub your tired eyes, the stinging pain in your back reminding you more than urgently that you have been up for way too long.
“You look tired, darling. Go change and get into bed with me.”
Oh, that deep voice behind you, the voice you learned to love to the moon and back. How did it even happen that a man like Nanami Kento was seeking interest in you? What was it that made a man like him even look your way? You’ve known each other for quite some time, seeing each other on missions from time to time. But when you began to work at Jujutsu High, everything changed so fast that you couldn’t keep up. And now you’re sitting here in his bedroom, watching in awe as he crawls into bed with nothing but his boxer shorts on.
You would love to get out of your uniform right now, But most importantly, you urge to take off that soaking wet bra that has been bugging you since afternoon. You have no choice, though. With a large chest like yours, it simply isn’t possible to leave the house for missions without extra support. You glance at him while he reads in his book, your gaze falling to your chest.
This isn’t exclusively about missions and you know it. Even though you’ve been together for a few months now, you were never brave enough to show Kento your breasts. Not without a bra, let alone completely naked. Just the thought of him seeing how your big breasts fall down when they slip out of their bra shells, the look on his face when he realizes that you don’t look like those large-chested models with their boobs standing like mountains. Yours definitely don’t. And you fucking hate it.
“I know that look on your face. You are uncomfortable, aren’t you?”
His soft voice rips you out of your pondering immediately. Fuck, he caught you again.
“No…I mean…Yes, kinda…”
You can’t lie into his gorgeous face, not even when the truth makes you feel so uncomfortable. Oh, how much you wished you look the way he deserves it with delicious female curves that suit his flawless appearance. But as soon as you look down, you just know how awful your boobs will look when set free. So you’ll do what you do every night: wait until Kento is asleep to finally take off your bra only to set an alarm in the morning to get up before him and put it back on.
“I always wondered why you are waiting until I sleep to take off your bra and put it back on before my alarm goes off.”
You can’t help but stare at him, mind racing while your palms start to get sweaty. Fuck, how did he even notice? No, why did you ever think he wouldn’t? Kento cares about you like none other, never pushed you to take off your shirt, never failed to ask you how you’re feeling.
“Listen, darling.”
He gets off the bed and kneels down in front of the chair you are sitting on, gently taking your hand into his.
“I just want to make sure you feel comfortable around me. Am I the reason that you don’t want to take your bra off? I can see clearly how uncomfortable it makes you feel.”
“No!”, you blurt out immediately.
Calm down your tingling nerves, this is ridiculous. You stare blankly at your hands intertwined with his.
“I mean…It has nothing to do with you, it’s me.”
“How is this about you, love? There is no reason for you to feel uncomfort-“
“I’m afraid.”
You swallow hard. Are you oversharing? Will he laugh at you for something so ridiculous? But what if he sees you naked at some point, his gaze dropping to your chest only to be greeted by your large hanging chest? You can imagine the look of disgust on his face, how he turns away from you, how-
“Hey, look at me darling. Look at me and tell me what’s wrong”
He cups your cheek gently, forces your haunted eyes to look at him, to stare into his orbs filled with sincerity. There is no way out of this, you can’t lie into his gorgeous face.
“When I take my bra of my breasts just…hang. It’s even visible through my t-shirt…”, you mumble, cheeks redder than the devil.
Thick silence hangs between both of you, his gaze still as soft as before. What is going on inside his head? Is he secretly laughing at you, does he even care about what you have to say?
“Let me make a few things clear.”
He lifts himself off the ground and pulls you up. You squint your eyes, mind racing over why on earth he made you stand up. Is he going to leave, to laugh?
“First of all: I love you just the way you are. I love your gorgeous smile, the way you walk, the way you talk, the way you carry yourself. And I love your breasts-“
“You didn’t even see them yet.”
“I don’t have to in order to know that”, he continues.
“Nothing makes me sadder than seeing you uncomfortable each and every night before going to bed. Of course, I don’t know for sure, but I imagine it to be really painful after some time. Isn’t it digging into your skin?”
Oh, you think about the countless times the sweat underneath your bra made you almost go insane, the red streaks that visibly show where the wire cut into your skin all day.
“It kinda is…”, you confirm with low voice.
“Don’t do this to yourself. I adore you just the way you are and I am dying to see you laying comfortably in your t-shirt next to me. So please, would you allow me to take it off for you?”
Your eyes widen in pure shock. Is this a bad joke, is he just teasing you? No, this is Nanami Kento. And the way he gazes at you with nothing but affection gleaming in his eyes tells you that he’s telling the true, that this is what he wants right now. But are you ready to expose yourself like this? What if he’s still disgusted after saying all those nice words?
You let your head fall against his chest, breathe in his delicious scent. A voice deep inside you tells you to stop, to just relax inside his arms. This is the man who chose you out of all people, who stood by your side no matter what. Kento proved more than once that he loves you dearly, never made you feel the slightest bit bad about yourself.
“Go ahead…”, you mutter against his chest.
His hands wander up your back gently, make shivers run down your spine until he reaches the clasp of your bra. Your heart simply stops when he unclips it through the fabric of your shirt. You fade into darkness as soon as his hands wander up to your shoulders, slide down the thick straps and pull down your bra until he finally lands on the floor.
Slowly, he takes a step back and picks it off the ground.
“You will never have to wear this again when you are home with me, okay? Not when it makes you feel so uncomfortable”, he gently speaks out.
You stare in awe while he carefully places your big bra over the chair and returns in an instant to pull you close against his chest.
“Come on, let’s go to sleep.”
“Yeah”, you mumble, body slowly but surely getting flooded by warmth.
“Going to bed sounds good…”
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Geto Suguru
You feel hot but at the same time cold, turned on but at the same time scared. This is it, the moment you’ve been waiting for. At this very moment, none other than Suguru Geto is laying on top of you, kissing you so passionately that you forget how to breathe.
What an overwhelming feeling it is to call him your boyfriend for a few months now. Such a kind and loving man, always looking out for you, giving you the time you needed for this to finally happen. You couldn’t believe your own ears when whimpering that you want him, that you are ready.
But are you really ready for showing him that part of your body? The part that began too grow way too early in your life, the part you’ve always got picked on by all the other girls.
“Look, there she is! She looks like a cow ready to milk!”
“That cleavage…She’s literally begging for it, what a bitch.”
“Ew, are those pimples on your tits?”
You know you are better than that, that your big breasts just belong to you and that you should love yourself just the way you are. But with none other than Suguru laying on top of you, his hands slowly but surely coming dangerously close to your breasts…
“Wait”, you breathe out, haunted eyes making Suguru stop in his tracks in an instant.
“Did I do something wrong? If you don’t want to, we don’t-“
“No, this is great. I- … I waited so long for this. But I just wanted to let you know that…”
You swallow hard. Are you acting ridiculous, destroying the moment with your behaviour? Suguru’s chocolate brown orbs don’t show a hint of annoyance. Instead, he gently strokes your hair while waiting for you to move on.
He deserves to know it
“I might not have the nicest boobs. They are big, but not well formed like the ones of those models. I tend to sweat a lot underneath them, my skin breaks out from time to time and my nipples might be-“
“Stop that right now, (y/n).”, Suguru gently interrupts you with a grin.
But it doesn’t look like the grin of the girls who picked on you for years. No, this grin is filled with warmth and loves, fills you with what feels like confidence. After all, he said that he loves you just the way you are over and over, right? Still, he didn’t even see your boobs. What if he changes his mind?
“There is absolutely nothing, and I mean NOTHING about you that isn’t ‘nice’. I don’t care about what the chest of random models looks like, to be honest I don’t care about anyone but you. And you are everything I want, you are everything I see, you are everything I love.”
His words make you tear up in an instant, send your whole body into space. As long as you can remember, no one ever said really nice things about your breasts and therefore you. You were either insulted or sexualized. But that force of a man on top of you…He just looks into your eyes that are filled with nothing but warmth. This man means every word he says.
“Well, that’s cool”, you mutter without even thinking about your words, lost in the sheer sight of his sincere eyes.
There is no one in the world you want to show your boobs more. Like in trance, you pull up the hem of your shirt and let it fall to the floor mindlessly.
“Are you okay with me touching them?”, he purrs against your ear.
A silent whimper escapes your lips while you simply nod, whole body on fire where it touches his. Painfully slow, he lets his hands wander down your hair onto your shoulders, trace the line of your collarbones until he reaches…
Your breasts.
What an unknown feeling. But oh, what a sensation as well. You arch your back out of instinct while he massages your breasts, the feeling of his fingertips against your still skin alone simply driving you insane.
God, who would have thought you’d ever hear Geto Suguru moan against your ear by just looking, touching, squeezing your boobs? His eyes are darkened by lust, the way his heart pounds against his ribcage echoes through your very own body.
“You look absolutely gorgeous. I can’t stop looking at you, (y/n).”
You feel like flying, fainting, losing your balance. There is no doubt in the fact that this man adores you the way you are, that your constant fear of him not liking your large chest was more than unfounded.
“So…you don’t mind the way my breasts look?”, you whimper underneath his bittersweet touch.
“More than that, I adore you”, he replies in an instant. “And now, let me see you in your full glory.”
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Yuji/Sukuna
You’re back feels like it might break every minute, shirt dripping in sweat in the sheer heat of the summer sun. You just want to get out of here, away from those disgusting people, back into your dorm. How stupid it was to leave Jujutsu High on your own for a little stroll through the city. Without the protection of Maki or Nobara, without any good friend who shields you from all the unwanted looks your large chest attracts. While most people think it must be a blessing, it definitely is a curse to you 80% of the time.
Just like right now.
“Come on, I just asked for one grab!”, a guy shouts after you.
Out of instinct, you pick up your pace, not even daring to turn around. What did you even do to catch his attention? You gaze down at your breasts that uncomfortably bounce up and down in the way too tight bra you are wearing today. No, you did absolutely nothing wrong. It’s just these disgusting people who seem to see nothing but the size of your chest.
“Why would you want to touch her? She looks like a cow”, the girl next to him comments along with an ugly laugh, making your heart sting in an instant.
“What a slut”, another voice mutters.
“Oh, I didn’t know you are out today! How are you, (y/n)?”
Your heart almost stops inside of your chest, hands beginning to tremble in an instant. No, not him. Not right here when these people are chasing you. If there’s someone you don’t want to hear those things about you, it’s Yuji Itadori.
“J-just…l-leave”, you stutter.
“Huh? But I just met you! Would you like to watch a movie with me?”
“Look, the cow brought her friends!”
“Do you think he’ll get in her pants today?”
“What a lucky bastard, I’d love to touch them just once…”
Yuji’s face drops in an instant when realizing their words are directed towards you.
“Hey, there’s no need to be rude”, he begins but gets stopped by uncontrollable laughter immediately.
You want to die right here on the spot, disappear from the surface of earth. As if being treated like this wasn’t enough, why does it have to be Yuji who witnesses it all?
“Step aside, loser. Let me handle that.”
Sukuna leans forward in his throne, thick anger rising inside of his chest. You, the one who caught his eye when he first saw you. You, with the immense powers. You, with a dangerous mind that could end wars. Who are these people to talk to you in this manner?
“Are you crazy? I definitely won’t let you out right now”, Yuji replies in an instant.
“You aren’t able to help her brat, now get lost!”
“I won’t let you-“
Enough.
“Now who exactly do you losers think you are, huh?”
That voice, that aura? Your mouth feels dry like the desert in an instant, eyes widen in pure shock. No, this is impossible, Yuji is in control over his body, this can’t be-
“With tits like yours, I would be jealous of someone gorgeous like her as well”, he spits at one of the girls following you.
“And you.”
With a swift motion, he grabs on of the guy’s wrists roughly. Just a little more pressure and it will snap.
“P-please. Don’t!”, you shout after him.
Urgh, why does your begging voice make his grip loosen in an instant, what is it about you that made him switch with this brat anyway?
“Were you really just trying to touch her chest? Thinking just because she has a big chest, you are allowed to touch her, to sexualize her, huh? You humans disgust me with your simple desires”, Sukuna continues.
“If it wasn’t for her unshakable character, I would kill every single one of you right on the spot. But for now-“
In the matter of seconds, all their arms hang in unhealthy directions, visibly broken by the sheer force of none other than Ryomen Sukuna.
You want to scream at him, want to run away, want to get away from this place. But on the other hand, a warmth fills your chest. Did the king of curses just stand up for you, protect you from their rude comments?
“Get going”, he barks at you.
“This was unnecessary”, you mumble.
“And give Yuji back.”
“You should be thankful, (y/n). They will worship you for the rest of your life.”
“No, they will be scared of you for the rest of their lives”, you clarify, hands still trembling.
“So what? Nobody gets away with insulting you over your perfect body. Especially not over the size of your chest. How ridiculous…”
You can’t believe your ears, eyes darting towards him in an instant while you turn redder than a tomato. Did he just say that you are…perfect?
“You didn’t mean that”, you breathe out.
“Oh god I’m so sorry (y/n). Did he hurt you?”, the familiar voice of Yuji cries out.
Calm down your tingling nerves, your pounding heart. Sukuna’s gone. Sukuna…stood up for you. Sukuna said you have a perfect body.
What?
“N-No”, you stumble.
How are you supposed to get over this?
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Gojo Satoru
Finally. You sit in front of the bar, excited by the smell of alcohol and cheap perfume that hangs in the air. After working your ass off for what felt like an eternity, you decided to use your day off right. You put on the dress that fits you best, packed your purse and went into the first bar you’ve seen.
Damn, when was the last time you were out on your own? With all your friends being out of town for vacation, this definitely is new.
“Not bad”, you mutter to yourself, eyes roaming around people making out, heartfelt laughter and a group of women sipping on their cocktails.
A cocktail, exactly what you need today.
“Hey, I’d love to order something”, you speak out when the waiter finally comes cross you.
What a lucky day, they even have your favourite cocktail in store. You’re usually not the type of girl to go out on yourself, but these last months, you truly learnt how enjoyable time can be with yourself as your only company. You smile to yourself. Yeah, this is definitely something you could get used to.
“There you go”, the friendly male announces and places the glass filled with joy in front of your hungry eyes.
You gift him the sweetest smile you have before taking a sip. Oh, this tastes absolutely amazing.
“I’ve never seen a woman like you alone in a place like this.”
Your heart drops to the floor in an instant, hands holding onto your glass tightly. Ew, a man is certainly the last thing you want to hear right now with the bartender being the only exception. Instead of even looking his way, you just take another sip of your well-mixed cocktail, the music blasting out of the boxes might make him think you can’t hear him and leave.
Honestly, there aren’t many things that creep you out more than men approaching you. Since you’ve reached puberty and your breasts starting to grow bigger and bigger, it almost felt as if you weren’t a person anymore. With rare exceptions here and there, most of them only talked to you because of one thing:
Your boobs.
Is the man sitting next to you one of them?
“Hey, I’m talking to you, gorgeous.”
Your whole body tenses up in an instant, eyes darting towards him by the sound of his harsh voice.
“Excuse me, I’m not up for a talk”, you bite back.
While you did meet genuinely nice men and have some male friends, the one sitting next to you certainly is one of the other categories. God, how much you hate it, being looked down at and reduced to the size of your breasts. You can’t even count how many times you’ve got commented on them, how many men and women just shamelessly stared at your bust instead of your face while talking to you. It’s safe to say you have enough of all of this.
“A woman who presents what she has like that is up for a talk and far more than that. Why would you come here dressed like a slut if you don’t want me to talk to you?”
Your breath gets stuck in your throat, all thoughts vanish into thick air. This disgusting guy with his beard filled with crumbs and breath stinking like the cheapest beer is definitely up for no good. You, dressed like a slut? You wear a basic black dress, the only one your boobs didn’t fall out when trying it on. What the hell is this creep talking about?
“Just because my boobs are big doesn’t mean I’m a slut. Watch how you talk to me”, you bite back.
“I talk however I want to a bitch like you. Are you up to go somewhere more…private?”
The scene that lays itself out in front of Gojo’s eyes is hard to bear. He doesn’t even know the woman in the black dress sitting in front of the bar, let alone the guy sitting next to her. But just one look into your disgusted face is enough to know that something isn’t right. How you cross your arms in front of your chest, your eyes filled with horror, the way you scoop backwards with every word this man says. Are you okay? He shouldn’t let other people’s business bother him. Fuck, wasn’t he here to get his mind off saving everyone all the time? Nah, he should enjoy his evening, drink that new whiskey they offer, just relax and-
You aren’t even able to comprehend what is happening next to you. He stretches out his hand, ready to touch your breasts without consent when another pair of hands stops him mid-air.
“I think the lady said no. Don’t ya think it’s a little over the top to go into a bar and touch a woman’s boobs?”
His voice might sound playful, but your blood freezes inside of your veins by the power he radiates. Just one glance into his face tells you he is like no men you’ve ever met.
“I…She…She said she wanted it to!”, the crumble beard tries to defend himself.
“I said what? Are you out of your fucking mind!? I told you to leave me alone and you harassed me!”, you clarify in harsh tone.
Oh, how much you’d love to break his nose right now, to give him a taste of his own medicine. But the white-haired man seems to have the same plans.
“A guy like you wouldn’t end up with her anyway. That lady has class. And you, my friend, are just a disgusting pervert. Are you touching other women too without consent? Isn’t your first time, huh?”
With a swift motion, he begins to twist the man’s hand around itself. He whines out in pain in an instant, face twisted just like yours before when he talked you down.
“Let me go!”, he cries out in visible discomfort.
“This is what you get for treating a lady so badly. You can be glad she even looked your way.”
When he gifts you a sly grin, you can’t help but blush. What is it about this man that feels so different, so damn inviting? He seems like no other men you’ve met before. And the fact that he just called you lady…Why do your knees suddenly feel weak?
“Now repeat after me: I.am.sorry.for.disrespecting.you.”
“I will not apologize to a girl who’s dressed like a slut!”
A loud crack makes the already muted room go completely silent, the violent scream coming out of this man’s mouth when his wrist breaks like spaghetti echoing through the room.
“Wrong answer”, the white-haired man purrs.
“Hey, would you mind just taking the trash out?”, the barkeeper questions.
“Did you hear that, dirty boy? Let me show you the way!”
“Are you alright? I didn’t even notice he was harassing you. I’m so sorry”, the bartender speaks out towards you.
“Oh, it’s okay.”
You aren’t even able to give him a real answer, eyes glued on the white-haired man who carries your harasser out like trash.
Like in trance you get back on your feet and follow him out into the cool air of the night.
“Have a nice evening!”, he friendly shouts after the man who sprints down the streets like a coward, as fast away as possible.
“You definitely scared the shit out of him”, you comment.
“He definitely deserved it. Are you okay?”
“Yeah, I’m used to shit like that”, you reply with a huff.
“But normally, they aren’t this disgusting.”
“I hate to hear that. You seem like a genuinely badass and nice person. You didn’t deserve his words.”
“Not as nice as my knight in shining armour who stopped him from touching my boobs.”
He lets out a heartfelt laughter, bright blue orbs set on you.
“Hey, what about me escorting you back home? I’m totally in the mood to beat up any other men who gets in your way.”
“Only if you let me join, though”, you challenge him.
“Definitely a deal. Hey, what’s your name?”
“(y/n)”
“(y/n), huh? Cool name, suits you right? My name’s Gojo Satoru. Nice to meet you.”
He stretches out his hand in front of you, inviting you to take it. You can’t help but smile at his sheer excitement. No, you just have to take his warm hand into yours and shake it.
“Let’s get you home, okay?”
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Dividers by @saradika 🤍
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rosenclaws · 19 days
Text
unworthy || worst!Logan x reader
summary: Even though he's in a new universe his past continues to haunt him in the form of you. You're nothing but nice but Logan can't take it, not after you died by his hands in his own universe.
warnings: reader has she/her pronouns, angst, fluff, hurt/comfort, flashbacks of blood and death. Logan gets brainwashed/manipulated in his past, emotionally unavailable Logan.
a/n: I saw that one tiktok prompt and decided to write this! I really like angst and low key might write a smutty part 2 but we will see! I hope you like it thank you!!!
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It's another sleepless night for Logan. He's been having a lot of those lately. Wade's couch isn't exactly comfortable either. Everyone here treats him like a hero. Praising him for saving their universe. He scoffs at the idea. He wears the damn costume but he doesn't feel like a hero. Not after what he did.
Logan stands up from the couch, throwing off the blanket and deciding he needs some air. He grabs his jacket and leaves the apartment. The door closes loudly behind him but he can't seem to care. He fidgets with a cigar as he waits for the elevator to bring him to the ground floor.
When the cool outside air hits his face he relaxes. With a finally lit cigar, he walks around aimlessly. The sounds of his past haunt him with every passing second. Sure he may have saved this world but he is far from the hero they think he is.
"Logan? What are you doing?" He closes his eyes as he hears your voice from behind.
He glances over his shoulder to see you wrapped up in a blanket, a tired look on your face. It's early, the sun isn't even up yet and you're clearly exhausted. Yet here you are, out in the cold for him. He grunts in response, turning back around. He hears you sigh and it makes his stomach turn. He waits for you to turn around and go back inside but you don't. To his frustration you stay, you can't seem to take the damn hint.
You never have, he's tried to stay away from you. Ignore you. But you're so persistent. Stubborn. It doesn't matter how little he speaks to you or even looks at you, you don't give up. How he wishes you would. How he wishes you could understand that he needs you to stay far away from him. That just looking at you hurts. Hearing your voice is even worse. And being next to you is a knife through his heart.
It's not fair that you're here, haunting him in this universe as you did in his own. Though he thinks it might just be his punishment for everything he's done. How cruel.
"Go back to bed." He grumbles, his voice is slightly muffled by the cigar in his mouth.
"No." You say simply. Staying right next to him, looking up at the sky as the sun starts to peek out. He stares at you in disbelief. Wordlessly he stomps out his cigar and turns to leave.
"Logan, wait!" You call after him and he clenches his jaw. Why do you have to follow him? Why are you chasing him? His hurt builds until all he can feel is white hot rage.
"For fucks sake! Can't you just fuck off?" His growls. "I am sick and tired of seeing you everywhere I fucking go! So please, just take the fucking hint and leave. Me. Alone." Venom dripping with every word. He watches you shrink under his angry gaze.
Words dying on your lips as you tighten the blanket around yourself. His chest heaves as his anger starts to dissipate. He watches your eyes grow glassy and your lip quiver ever so slightly.
"I..I'm sorry." You mumble out an apology before running past him. Guilt creeps up inside of him but he doesn't let it show. It's better this way.  That's what he repeats over and over. Trying to convince himself it's true.
-
You don't understand what you've done to piss off Logan this much. To make him hate you the way he does. All you wanted was to befriend him, to help him. That's what you did with your Logan. His first friend in the X mansion all those years ago. Sure your Logan was just as untrusting and gruff at first but he learned to accept his family. He changed. Maybe it's your fault for thinking it would be the same. He's not your Logan. You have to remind yourself of that.
He looks just like him though. Talks like him, even smells like him. Your Logan yelled and had his moments but he always came back, pulling you tight and apologizing. But the anger in his eyes is something you'll never forget. He's not your Logan and he never will be. After that night you make a point to stay out of his way. Refusing Wade's dinner invitations and waiting until odd hours to leave your apartment, not wanting to even risk seeing him out in the hallways.
Eventually you ran out of excuses that Wade would accept and you were dragged back to his apartment for Mary Puppins' birthday party. At least the apartment was busy. You awkwardly stand in the corner of the room as they sing Happy Birthday. Logan and Wade are surrounded by everyone with Mary Puppins in Wade's arms. A little birthday hat on her head and somehow Wade got on on Logan's head.
As Wade gives a long, heartfelt speech about Mary and you grimace as she licks his face. Logan lets out a noise of disgust as stares at the two of them. You let out a little laugh, thinking you were being quiet enough but Logan's eyes snap to you. Nerves creeps over you as he refuses to look away. Without another word you set you cup down and leave.
Logan wanted space, so that's what you're giving him.
-
Logan watches you leave, a pang in his chest as he watches the joy fade from your face.
"God it's like watching a wet cat stare into the window of a loving home." Wade shakes his head disappointingly.
"Shut up." Logan growls.
"Hey don't get mad at me. I'm not the one who lashed out due to my inability to process my emotions." Logan raises his fist and unsheathes his claws.
Deep down he knows Wade is right, but he'll never admit it. Instead he puts his claws away and rips off the party hat. He weaves through the party guests to get to the door.
"Go get her Crocodile Dundee!" Wade shouts but Logan ignores him.
He knocks on your door but you don't answer. His heart begins to sink as he realizes that maybe he's pushed you too far. All he has to blame is himself. He's hurt you yet again. A part of him tells him to turn and leave. Just give up and accept his fate. But He waits and waits.
There's a small part of him keeping him rooted to the spot outside of your door, telling him that this time he can make it right. People trickle out of his apartment but he pays them no attention. Hours pass and still no sign of you. Still he remains determined. He closes his eyes and leans back. Ready to wait as long as it takes.
-
The morning after Wade's party sucks. You feel like shit, physically and mentally. You barely got enough sleep last night with your mind running all night. Sighing you decide the only thing that can salvage your morning is a donut. Though when you go to open your door, you're met with a very heavy resistance.
"What the?" You mumble as you push hard against the door. You hear someone swear before shuffling on the other side. When you can finally open your door all the way you see Logan standing in front of you. Was he out here all night?
"What do you want?" You ask tiredly. You're really not in the mood to deal with him right now.
"I..." Logan doesn't know where to start. How to even begin to apologize. Sighing you close your door but Logan sticks his arm out.
"Wait! Please, just, I need to say some things. You don't have to forgive me but I need to say them." Silently you open your door and let him in. He watches nervously as you make your way to your couch.
"You're dead in my world." He winces at his own bluntness.
"And I killed you." Logan paces back and forth as he tries to piece together his nightmares.
"It was supposed to be a simple mission. Recon. I don't even go on those kinds of missions but I didn't want you going alone." He squeezes his eyes shut as he remembers.
"Logan!" You scold lightly.
"Keep your hands to yourself." He smirks as he walks you up against the walls of the jet.
"You don't normally complain about where my hands go." Rolling your eyes playfully, you place a kiss on his cheek.
"Just wait till after the mission okay?" He winks and pulls you in for a kiss.
"Fine, but after this I get you all to myself."
"We walked in and everything went wrong."
Something was wrong and he knew it. Still you insisted on finishing your mission. The moment you stepped through the door he wanted to take you and run. He should have. But he acted too late. The things he saw, A wall separating the two of you. Hearing your screams for help as he couldn't get to you.
"Well well, aren't you an interesting one." He looks around for the voice but all he can see is darkness. His claws swipe at the wall as he hears your voice pleading for his help. Suddenly the wall lifted and all he could see was someone with a gun to your head. He doesn't hesitate to jump into action. Fighting with everything he's got.
"Logan!" Your scream sounds far away as he shoves his claws deep into the man's stomach.
To his confusion the world begins to melt around him. To his horror he sees you standing in front of him. Cuts and bruises on your face, not caused by the enemies, but by him.
"It's okay," You whisper. Your hands shake as you try to reach out for his face. He doesn't want to look down, knowing that if he does, he'll see his claws deep in your stomach. Slowly your body sinks to the ground. His claws retract and you cry as they leave your body. He wraps his arms around you as you grow weak in his arms.
"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry." He repeats over and over again. His hands press on your stomach and you groan in pain. There's too much blood but he doesn't care. He can fix this, he can save you.
"Logan, It's okay my love." You brush his face with your bloody hand.
"No! I can fix this! We just have to get you home yeah?" He tries to move you but you scream in pain. It's too late, you've accepted it but he can't seem to.
"Come on sweetheart, please." He pleads desperately as he brings your body closer to him.
"Please, I'm sorry."
"It's not your fault," It's getting harder to breathe but strangely you're completely at peace. Logan doesn't understand how you can be.
"I'm sorry, I love you." He doesn't let go of you, repeating that like a mantra as you die in his arms. 
"I killed you, I let whatever fucking asshole inside of my head and I killed you." He stops pacing and finally looks at you.
He blinks and it's like he's back in his nightmare. Blood on your face, a pitiful look on your face as you try and comfort him in your last moments. It makes him sick.
"I saw you everywhere I went, I let it ruin me. I became the monster you said I could never be." You reach out of him but he recoils from your touch.
"Then Wade found me and now I'm here thinking maybe I had changed but now you're fucking here. I see you every time I close my eyes and now I see you here." His claws come out in a fit of anger as he slams his hands against the arm of your couch.
"And you're so nice, too nice. You look at me just like she did and it kills me inside." His claws retract as he slowly approaches you.
"I'm sorry for hurting you, I don't deserve this. Any of this." Tears pool in your eyes as you watch the man break down right in front of you. Weighed down by the guilt of his past. Things begin to click together, why he's been so hostile towards you all this time.
"Logan, what happened isn't your fault." You say calmly. His breath hitches, you sound just like you did back then. Same tone and everything.
"If I was stronger, smarter..."
"You were tricked, it was an accident." You slowly move closer to him, worried that you'd scare him like a wounded animal.
"How can you be so kind about this?" He asks in disbelief.
"I killed you!"  His claws come out as he brings them dangerously close to your face.
"I put my claws through you, I watched you bleed out in my arms."  You gently touch his claws, moving them away from your face and bringing his hand to your chest. He resists, not wanting to touch you. Not wanting to hurt you
"I'm not her Logan. I'm here, I'm alive. You don't have to push me away." His eyes close as relents and places his hand on your heart. The steady beating grounds him back to reality. His memories slowly fade as he listens. Now only focused on you.
Ba bump Ba bump Ba bump 
"I know you think you deserve the worst. But you don't. Maybe, maybe this isn't the punishment you think it is. Maybe, the universe is giving you a do over.” You two know that you're different from the ones that you loved. That no matter how much you look like each other, its never going to be the same. But the same for both of you means death, loneliness. So maybe this is a good different.
“You’ve always been too good for me.” He says.
“No, I think I’ve always been what you needed.” Logan lets go of you but he stays close.
His thumb reaches out to brush away a stray tear. He cups your face and leans in slowly. He seems reluctant to take the final leap. To truly accept that he deserves good things so you meet him half way. Tugging at his shirt you bring your lips to his.
It's soft and sweet. Like a first kiss you share on the front steps of your porch after a first date. A first kiss, a fresh start. Logan deepens the kiss, guiding you gently to the couch. His lips travel down to your neck, nipping at your skin as he mumbles apologies.
"Logan," You squeak. He sits up, worry on his face.
"Too much?" He runs his hand over where he bit.
"No, but maybe we start slower. Breakfast?" Logan almost laughs at the idea of something so domestic but a fresh start is what he wanted. It's what he's gotten and he's not going to waste it.
"Yeah, breakfast sounds good."
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princessbrunette · 15 days
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⊹ ᜊ(ᜊ ´ ˘)੭ ♡ … JUNO ♡
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track ten of the short n’sweet series. pairing: linecook!jj x reader. based loosely on the song juno by sabrina carpenter. enjoy! ໒꒰՞ ܸ. .ܸ՞꒱ა
when jj comes home from his shift, you’re sat at the kitchen table wearing your little slip dress, a crease between your brows and a bunch of papers infront of you.
you barely even notice him come in, jumping slightly when he leans over and presses a kiss to your cheek in passing, still smelling like the stove at work. “howdy, baby.” he greets, characteristically chipper even when he’s probably exhausted.
“hi jayj.” stress tugs every chord in your voice, bringing your nail to your teeth to nibble on. you hated bringing up bills, especially when he’d just done a long day at work — it made you feel bad. however, you’d spent the evening going over your purchases and working out the split between the two of you. the papers had been on the table for three days now, and you needed his help in working it all out.
“you alright? ‘sound upset.” he converses as he places a grocery bag down on the counter, assumably having made a stop before he got home. he turns to you, hands on his hips giving you his full attention.
“y—yeah…it’s just…” you tilt your head sympathetically with a guilty expression as you look at him, as if to say ‘i’m sorry to bring this up’. you were always overly apologetic. “these bills have been sat here for three days and i really feel like we should handle them.”
he visibly relaxes as soon as he realises that’s the problem, waving you off and turning back to the counter to continue unpacking. “oh, don’t sweat — i covered them all this mornin’.”
“what?” you blink.
he glances at you over his shoulder, like it’s nothing. “my bad, forgot to mention— uh, yeah. made a lot of dough at work this month, been reeling in the tips. figured i’d just get ‘em done.”
you sigh, standing up. “jesse james i am sending you my side of the money right now—” you scramble for your phone and he laughs, turning round to grab your wrists gently.
“aint i supposed to look after you? this is what i wanted. trust me. all you gotta do is sit there and look pretty. let papa j handle the rest, alright?” he smiles, giving you a teasing little shake before patting your cheek and turning back to the counter. you were stunned, something primal and warm clawing its way out of the deep insides of your arousal. it may have seemed like nothing to him, but to you — well, you thought he deserved the world.
before you get to speak, or thank him. he’s back to chatting. “anyways, you eaten?”
“wh— no, not yet i was trying to get all these bills worked out and i forgot—”
“aw baby, you know how i feel ‘bout you not eating. luckily for you, ‘ya man’s a chef. si’ddown.”
“jj, don’t be silly you just got home and you paid the bills i should be making you din—”
“sit…your cute ass down.” he turns around, pointing a stick of celery at you threateningly. slowly, you lower yourself into the chair— bug eyed and in love. once you’re seated he smiles in satisfaction with a nod and turns back to his groceries, gathering the ingredients. “remember how you said last night that you were cravin’ spaghetti? well, i ran to the store after work and i’mma whip up the best spaghetti you’ve ever tried.”
“oh my god, jj. you’re too good to me.” you sigh, doe eyed. the relief of everything being taken off your shoulders was overwhelming, even if it was riding on a subtle pit of guilt. jj was always looking after everyone, even back in the days where he had nothing.
so, he makes you food whilst you sit at the table. he tells you about his day, you tell him about yours. he sits at your side, forks spaghetti into your mouth, tells you you’re pretty until you’re certain there’s red and pink lovehearts floating above your head. you had to repay him, and you knew a way mutually beneficial to the two of you.
when he’s washing up the dishes, which he insisted on doing — jj is borderline jumpscared by the clinking sound of you slinging something over his shoulder to dangle it infront of him.
“now where the hell did you get those?” he chuckles at the pink fuzzy handcuffs you’re showing off.
“nevermind where i got them. you’re coming with meeee.” you giggle, pressing yourself to his back, dotting kisses wherever you could reach. he slowly spins around with a smirk, eyeing your mischievous expression.
“a’ight i see what’s goin’ on… that time of the month already huh? you photosynthesising?”
“what?”
“y’know that time of the month where you get real horny?”
“ovulating?”
“yeah, that’s the one.”
“no…” you tilt your head, batting your lashes as you try to get a hold of his wrists, the blonde too busy cupping your cheeks with his damp hands. “well, maybe. but that’s not the point. you’ve been looking after me so well lately, i just wanna look after you.” you pout, and he blinks — raising his eyebrows as he grips the metal chains between his fingers.
“oh you— so i’m gonna be wearing these bad boys?” his voice lilts up in non-judgemental confusion.
“yep.” you beam. you couldn’t dominate a bag of flour, as jj so gracefully put once — but you figured atleast not letting him touch you could be fun.
jj returns your grin, always down for anything. “alrighty, take me away officer!” he offers his wrists proudly, letting you lead him to the bedroom.
twenty minutes later, and he’s now seeing the point of the handcuffs. had they not been there, he would have flipped you on your back by now — have your knees to your chest, taking over completely. but there you were, torturing him. your supple body straddles him, stark naked and glowing under the dim light of your bedroom, glossy walls swallowing him, choking his shaft as you grind like your life depends on it. your pretty moans are all he can hear as he tugs his wrists against their constraints, desperate to touch you.
“c’mon, lemme— god damn— lemme negotiate here. what can i do to… just lemme touch you mama c’mon.” he strains, eyes struggling not to roll back.
“want a baby jj. wanna fuck a baby out of you.” you blurt out in a whine, setting his senses on fire. you’d talked about it, sure — but dropping it at a time like this had his heart pounding and balls tightening. the possibility was suddenly very real.
“you— now? you want it now, sweetie?” his voice cracks, wet lips parted.
“mhm. please.” it was sweet, watching you bounce on his dick all desperate and submissive despite having him handcuffed to the headboard. his dick just did that to you.
“shit, well — ain’t no backin’ out now baby. whether you like it or not it’s comin’.” he squeezes his eyes shut, letting you work him over inside you. it’s not long before he’s releasing, hot sticky fluids filling you until it’s spilling out — the sound of you continuing to ride him creating a leud squelching sound that you dimmed your own depraved whimpers just to hear better.
you knew he’d take care of you once more once you got those cuffs off him, but for now you could revel in the feeling of what could potentially have just changed your lives forever.
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miley1442111 · 4 months
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i wanna kiss you on the mouth -s.reid
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a/n: i am back from the dead! hello, i was gone for the past few days because school and work is hectic but rest assured i am back :)
summary: both of you are completely unaware of your feelings, but you speak too loudly and your feelings are confessed.
pairing: spencer reid x bau! fem! reader
warnings: none
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Spencer had only been thinking of you every day for the past 4 months. From the moment he woke up, to the second his head hit the pillow. You were on his mind. 
It’s weird he tried to convince himself. You were his childhood best friend, who’d just moved to Washington. You were a year older but just as intelligent, if not more, and you were conversational and interesting. You had people skills that he could only dream of, and a smile he could only dream of. Which he did. Dreamt of you a lot. Usually you were his girlfriend, or occasionally his wife. Sometimes you were clothed... others he wasn't exactly proud of. But it wasn't him technically, it was his subconscious. Right?
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“We have a new case,” Penelope grimaced as you rolled your eyes, clearly hungover from the night prior. 
“Bad date?” Derek mused and Spencer’s muscles tensed. 
“I don’t even remember Derek, all I know is that I woke up in someone else’s bed,” you chuckled. 
“Cheating on me?” He mocked. 
“Always,” you smirked, lowering the sunglasses on your eyes to give him a wink, one which made him laugh. 
Spencer’s chest tightened. You were going out. You had casual sex. That was fine, you’re an adult. He shouldn’t be bothered. You two hadn’t spoken in years before you joined the BAU 4 months ago. 
“Pretty boy?” Derek repeated. “Are you alright? You’re not listening.”
“S-sorry! Just… thinking…” he trailed off as the conversation flowed again, ideas and questions filled the room as they continued the briefing. 
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The jet was not much easier. You were smirking at your phone as the others napped or looked over the case file. 
“Who’s that?” Emily smirked, looking over your shoulder. 
“My maybe-boyfriend,” you smiled back as her face lit up. Spencer’s heart dropped. You barely look in his direction most days. You don’t talk to him. You clearly don’t care about him. Yet here he is, upset over the fact that you might have a boyfriend. “Kidding, my apartment complex’s group chat is going off right now because someone is playing music really loudly. My neighbour is threatening to kill the old woman in 35 with a kitchen knife,” you chuckled as Emily deflated, but read the messages aloud, which made the entire jet laugh. Spencer smiled along, an ease in the weight on his chest. 
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You were exhausted. You hated this. You hated being so close to Spencer and not feeling able to talk to him. You hated how much you wanted him, needed him. You hated how little attention he paid to you. You didn't like going on first dates, much less sleeping with the asshole that was 'Josh' but he had a similar vibe to Spencer and you'd needed a release.
“Fuck,” you yawned, allowing your eyes to drop for a few seconds before Derek hit the back of your head to wake up. You groaned in response as he laughed. “Fuck you.”
“Come do it yourself,” he smirked and you rolled your eyes. “Anyways, how is it going?”
“I’ve narrowed down the geological profile from Spencer’s initial one-”
“I mean ‘Project Reid’!” He gossiped. “Have you even talked to him yet?”
“Derek,” you grumbled, resting your head against your hands. “He doesn’t want to talk to me, he doesn’t even fucking like me!” 
Derek internally rolled his eyes, irritation bubbling at the both of you. How could two of the most gifted profilers he knew not realise the goo-goo eyes they were sending each other while the other wasn’t looking?
“He likes you plenty,” he sighed. “Ask him out! Talk to him.”
“He does not like me!” You squealed. “Spencer Walter Reid does not like me, in a friendly way or a I-want-to-kiss-you-on-the-mouth way! Stop pushing something that will not happen, despite how much I want it to!”
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As Spencer approached the conference room, his weary eyes tired as they focused on your figure. You looked beautiful. Spencer always thought you looked beautiful.
“He does not like me!” You squealed. “Spencer Walter Reid does not like me, in a friendly way or a I-want-to-kiss-you-on-the-mouth way! Stop pushing something that will not happen, despite how much I want it to!”
What.
You liked Spencer? You wanted to kiss Spencer. You just amditted to liking him.
“What?” Spencer’s voice from behind you startled you as Derek laughed. “Y-you want that?”
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“What?” Spencer’s voice from behind you startled you as Derek laughed. “Y-you want that?”
You stared in Derek’s direction, willing for him to leave. Thankfully, he got the message immediately and left swiftly. Leaving you and Spencer alone together. Maybe he should’ve stayed. 
“Umm… yeah. I’ve like you since we were kids, but y’know… life got in the way-”
You were shocked. Spencer Reid, shy Spencer Walter Reid had just cut off your sentence with a kiss. 
What was going on? 
His lips were soft (he used lip balm often, clearly), his hands rested tentatively on you waist. But the kiss. If you could describe kissing Spencer Reid in one word, it would be hungry. He kissed you with as much passion as you would assume someone to give to their partner on their wedding day. He was blanking your mind with this insanely mind-blowing kiss.
“I really like you too,” he smiled. “I an I-wanna-kiss-you-on-the-mouth kinda way. Like I really want to do that again,” he smiled again and you couldn’t help but kiss him. His hands landed on your waist, more comfortable than before as your arms circled his neck. 
Maybe all his overthinking about you was too much. Maybe it was just that simple. 
You liked each other.
In an I-wanna-kiss-you-on-the-mouth kinda way. 
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criminal minds masterlist :)
navigation for my blog :) (CRIMINAL MINDS, marvel, top gun, the bear, the hunger games, challengers, obx+)
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