#but i had the worst conversation of my life with the guy in the parking garage

[cynric]

there is nothing that makes me forget how to act like a normal human person than being in manhattan, other boroughs are literally fine but as soon as i have to drive into manhattan its like i got hit in the head with a hammer and forgot how to speak to people and also how to drive

[platypusisnotonfire]

I was thinking the same thing like

1. That’s not the most common reason

And

2. Even if it was

Also, like, I'm sorry but if you've set up a free shelter, and people refuse to go because sleeping on the sidewalk under a freeway bridge is more pleasant, that's fucking on you, that's not on them.

You really can't compete with sleeping under the overpass so you are going to force people into shelter?

Unspeakably cruel and stupid.

[writingouthere]

singlemom!reader x neighbor!sukuna. you miss having a baby and Sukuna is dying from a combination of your sexual tension, his lowkey(highkey) baby fever and the drudgery of attending a child's birthday party

cw: Sukuna's breeding kink, red flags are present and accounted for, no one gets laid tho so sad face. this actually ended up being way more sincere and heartfelt than I intended but honestly very typical of me

"Oh we're not together, Sukuna's just been letting me and Bug crash while we look for an apartment."

"Oh he's not my boyfriend, we're just friends!"

"He's actually not Bug's dad. No, no. But, they get along really well. She enjoys having someone else to hang out with aside from me, I think."

Your laughter after the last one plays on repeat as he goes to grab the two of you some refreshments. Sukuna feels like he's living the world's worst version of groundhog day, except instead of being some sad loser who relives the same day over and over, he's apparently a sad loser who is going to live the same conversation over and over again.

"Fuck this shit."

"Um, excuse me but could you watch your language. This is a kid's birthday party." Sukuna wants to ask the bitch who is correcting a grown man's language if he would mind watching his own fucking business but you seem to care about what these losers think and he won't make life difficult for you.

If he happens to step on the guy's foot as he leaves with two cups and a juice box caught in his elbow, well, his steel toed boots need the exercise.

Sukuna knew that if any of his acquaintances, he didn't have friends after all, could see him now, they would die laughing. Die ,because he would kill them for laughing, but fuck he couldn't even really blame them, even in his hypothetical.

Once upon a time, Sukuna was a feared criminal. People pissed themselves when he cornered them in a dark alley. Other bad guys would look at him and say, "wow that guy's a real piece of shit" and now look at him. Stuck at some three year old's birthday party. One more kidzpop butchering of an already shitty song away from committing another felony.

Maybe it wouldn't be so bad if he knew he was at least getting some pussy out of it, but he had just spent the past two hours hearing you deny him to anyone who asked and it was really starting to get to him.

He knew he was being a little bitch about it, and he wasn't upset just because you weren't fucking him. He was upset that all the things you were telling people, they were technically true. He was just letting you and your daughter crash. He was just your friend, not your boyfriend. Even the comments about him not being Bug's dad, but him being positioned as some kind of really invested babysitter, those might have stung more than the ones about your relationship but you thought that was true too.

Thinking about the kid made him look for her, not that Sukuna ever wasn't aware of where you and your daughter were. It had become instinct before he was even aware of it.

Bug was laughing with some kids he recognized from daycare and others from their regular trips to the park. Her happiness was contagious and Sukuna found his lips twitching up at the ends despite his shitty mood.

Your daughter's eyes found him from across the playground. "kuna!" she called, waving her little hand at him. He waved back with his available hand and made his way towards her. She met him halfway, her little legs unsteady on the wood chips but she didn't seem to notice. She was always like that when she saw him, she ran fearlessly. Maybe she just trusted he'd catch her.

Was it so wrong of him that he didn't like the reminders she wasn't his. That it stung, not just because of his feelings but because it just couldn't be true. He might not have fathered her, but fuck anyone who said this little girl wasn't his.

"I got you a juice, you've been running around so much you gotta be thirsty."

"Not thirsty," Bug argued leaning into him. He held up his hands that were holding the grown up drinks for the two of you, and moved the package still lodged in the crease of his elbow towards the petulant toddler. "Take it, or I'll drink it."

Bug stuck her tongue out at him and grabbed it. She struggled to get the wrapping off the straw and Sukuna didn't even notice what he was doing until she had the straw stretched out towards him and he was pulling the wrapper off with his teeth. He spit it out on the ground as your daughter gave him a polite thank-you and then walked away, sipping her juice as she went to catch up with her friends.

What had become of him?

"Need a hand?" You smile at him and Sukuna hands over your cup before taking a sip of his own. There was unfortunately no alcohol in it but drinking it occupied his mouth before he acted like a pussy and asked you, "what are we?" or "should we get married?" or something equally as pathetic.

"God, I want a baby."

Sukuna almost spit out his drink but he manages to tone it down to just a little cough before turning to look at you. You don't even seem a little embarrassed which is just infuriating. Sukuna's about to make a suggestion on how he can help with that when you sigh and point to where some loser is holding their ugly baby.

"Aren't babies just the cutest, I miss when Bug was that age."

Oh, so this was just you looking at other people's red-faced brats and feeling nostalgic and was not in fact a call to action. Sukuna rolled his eyes and leaned back on the hand closest to you so he didn't touch you as he was so tempted to do these days.

"That baby, like all babies, is hideous. All they do is cry, shit themselves and vomit and I'm not even sure Bug is the exception to that and she's the best kid there is."

You look touched at his affection for your daughter but also fired up on behalf of babies everywhere.

"You can't just say a baby is hideous, Sukuna. Those are the Zenin's. Bug is friends with some of them."

"Well are the older ones cuter, because that baby looks like someone fucked one of those hairless cats."

"Sukuna!" you hiss but he sees you smile, despite yourself. "Okay, maybe that baby isn't like the cutest baby-"

"Hideous."

You continue after smacking his arm. "But Bug was cute, okay. And I'm not just saying that because I'm her mom." You take out your phone and quickly swipe until you get to what you're looking for. "See, cute baby."

Sukuna grabs your phone and looks. It's not the first picture he's seen of a young Bug and he's taken his share of photos of her himself, but he finds himself taken in by it anyway.

It has to be a picture from when Bug was really young, she still had the scrunched up, red face that he associates with newborns. But he thinks you're right, she's still cute. He doesn't know if it's because he knows that baby will grow up to be your daughter, but he finds his thumb caressing her little baby cheeks, the wisps of hair he can see peaking out from where she's wrapped in a baby blanket. It's then he sees she's not alone in the picture and there's a different version of you holding her.

The thing that stands out to him is how tired you look. He thinks this couldn't have been too long after you gave birth but still, he wondered if you'd gotten any rest those first few months. You still didn't like talking about your ex, or the circumstances that had led you to his apartment, but Sukuna knew that chances are you were taking care of Bug single handedly and that couldn't have been easy, cutest kid or not.

"She was beautiful, she still is." He reluctantly hands the phone back to you and you look at the picture again, tears building up in your eyes.

"She is the best thing that has ever happened to me. I-I wish that the circumstances were different in how I got her. Sometimes, I wonder how I'll explain everything to her when she's older. She just deserves so much better than him, you know?"

"You both do." Sukuna reaches over and brushes away one of the tears that had managed to fall down your cheek. He leaves his hand there a moment, holding your cheek in his palm, just appreciating the warmth.

"Do you want any?"

"What?" Sukuna isn't sure what you're talking about anymore. He can only see your lips right in front of him, the way that your eyelashes brush against your cheek as you blink faster and faster.

"Babies, do you want any?"

Something short circuits in Sukuna's brain and he wants to say, fuck yes.

He wants to tell you that he thinks about it every day. Every time you put Bug on your hip or send him youtube videos of hairstyles you want to try on her. Whenever it's late at night, and little feet pad out of your room and Bug asks him in the loudest whisper he's ever heard, if he can get her some water because she's so thirsty.

He thinks about it when the sun streams through the curtains of his apartment in the morning and it lights up your hair as you move throughout the kitchen, a force of nature, a creature from somewhere far too good to have ended up here with him.

He thinks about it when the three of you go out and people just assume you're a family, because of course you're a family. When you and Bug play some made up game, or Bug gets tired even though she denies it and he carries her sleeping form against his chest. When he holds her in his lap on the subway and you lean to rest your head on his shoulder and he feels like this, this is what he's always wanted.

He's not all pure and good though, because he thinks about it late at night in his bedroom too. After a day of your smiles, of seeing your thighs stretch out of those sleep shorts you started wearing when the weather warmed up, whenever he remembers the feel and smell of your panties when he's lucky enough to find a pair in the laundry basket, he thinks about how the two of you would make some really cute fucking babies.

He's imagined it a million ways. He's imagined you telling him you've gone off your birth control and you need him now after he takes you out on an anniversary dinner. Or him crowding you up against the kitchen counter and you begging him to put a baby in you.

His favorite fantasy is currently one where you get so carried away when you finally finally fuck that you don't ask him to wear a condom and he spends the whole night making sure you're nice and good and full of him and when you tell him a few weeks later you missed your period, he'll let you freak out. But then he'll tell you that he'll take good care of you, and Bug, and your soon to be little one and he'll finally have you, all of you and once you have your second, he'll knock you up again, as many times as he can because there could never be too many mini-you's running around.

At this point, Sukuna remembers he's talking to you, the real you and he swallows a few times before he speaks.

"I do," he says simply but something must show on his face because you're looking at him in a way you never have before. He hears your breath hitch and he leans in to kiss you, and you smell so good and his thoughts are consumed by the little family he just knows you're going to have when suddenly he's pelted by a variety of sharp, little objects.

Sukuna immediately holds up his arm to shield you from what he now sees is a barrage of wood chips which are being thrown at you by an army of toddlers, including your daughter.

You immediately get up and start talking to the kids about the danger of throwing what are basically large future splinters at people's faces and Sukuna is contemplating the murder of every child that isn't his own when you turn to look at him.

You're not just looking at him, you're seeing him and oh. Maybe he would be getting laid tonight, after all.

The slow burn is almost done folks.

thank you to the amazing reception to this series and the one-shot I posted(which there will be a prequel of soon!). it's literally so insane. Masterlist will be up tomorrow which I hope helps with accessibility!

edit: masterlist is up!

[highvern]

Drive Me Crazy

Pairing: Jeon Jungkook x f!reader

Genre: smut

warnings: strangers to lovers, virgin!JK, dry humping, oral sex, cum eating

Length: ~3.7k

Note: yes i'm insane. no i won't be taking further questions. thank u @gyuswhore for chaperoning my descent into JK madness

summary: You're not the only one with a shitty dating life. Your driver seems to be having a worse night than you can imagine. But things take a turn for the better in the backseat of his car.

m.list

This blog is intended for 18+ only! Minors/blank blogs will be blocked.

“Uber for Y/N?” you ask, stumbling into the backseat. “Thanks. God, you wouldn’t believe the night I’ve had.”

“Jesus fucking Christ,” the man, Ian according to the information on the app, gasps. 

“Sorry, didn’t mean to startle you.” You’re a wreck; makeup running, clothes damp from the rain peppering on the window. The last thing you want is some hot guy as your driver for the short journey back to your apartment but at this point you can’t muster the energy to care. 

“Uhhh—”

“You probably don’t want to hear about my shitty night.”

“Well that and—” he starts, cut off before he can say more by your tipsy motormouth. 

“Where does a man get off telling me he isn’t interested in gold diggers when he’s a public school teacher? No offense but what gold?” you ramble. “Not to mention, when I told the waiter to split the bill he asked if I thought he didn’t have any money. Like make up your mind dude.”

“What the fuck?” he asks lowly.

You nod in agreement, hands thrown wide in exasperation. “That’s what I’m saying!”

“That’s fucked up.”

The thickness of his voice doesn’t register in your mind, a broken edgy scratching at the edges of your brain but it doesn’t signal any significant interest “Oh, that's not even the worst part.”

“There’s more?”

“He said ‘I asked too many personal questions.’”

“Like?”

“What he liked to do for fun, if he’s originally from the city, do you like dogs or cats? Literally anything I could think of because apparently he’s allergic to carrying a conversation.” In your hand, your phone rings with an unsaved number. “Hello?”

“Hi, this is your Uber. Did you mean to cancel your ride?”

“What?”

“Ian from Uber? I’ve been circling the block and haven’t found you and you weren’t answering your phone.”

“Oh! I’m sorry I’ll just—cancel. Yep. Bye.” You stare at the equelly unease expression on Not-Uber Driver Ian’s face, muddled brain racing. If he isn’t your driver that means you got into the car with a random man. 

“Who the fuck are you?” you scream. 

“Who the fuck are you?” he yells back.

You fiddle with the door handle, unable to grab a hold with shaky hands. “Oh my god, you’re a kidnapper.”

“I’m not a kidnapper!”

“That’s what a kidnapper would say!” You fumble for the pepper spray in your bag only to find it absent. It’s not your usual bag. It’s the nicer one that barely fits your phone and chapstick. Damn it.

“YOU GOT IN MY CAR,” he argues.

He makes a good point. “Why didn’t you say anything?”

“I tried but you talk a lot.” 

Another good point.

“Oh my god, what the hell,” you gasp. “Why are you sitting here with the doors unlocked? I could have robbed you.”

“I used my last five bucks to buy this ice cream. Just kill me instead.”

You balk. “That’s so sad.” 

“Yeah, I’m aware.”

“You’re a horrible kidnapper.”

“And you’re a pretty shitty carjacker so I’d say we’re even.”

If he was dangerous he's had plenty of time to prove it. Instead, when he looks back over the center console, all you see is the red rimmed eyes of a kicked puppy with a bird nest for hair. A ridiculous expression for a man of his size but you pity him nonetheless. He’s harmless. Pathetic. But harmless. 

There’s a story about him and you’ve always been curious. “Okay, not-Ian, why are you sitting in a parking lot eating ice cream on a Friday night? Kidnapper thing aside, this is just sad.” 

He’s hot. Even in nothing but sweats and his own misery. The intimidating kind of handsome that people, men and women, pine over. Hand themselves over on a silver platter if he so much as asked.

“Thanks,” he grunts, going for another spoon of ice cream. 

“So why are you upset?” The rain outside intensifies, setting the scene to bare your souls in his cramped Toyota.

“Ugh…” he hesitates. 

“You don’t have to tell me, but I don’t think it can be any more embarrassing than what I just went through.”

“Wanna bet?”

“Why not? If it’s more embarrassing then I won’t steal a bite. Is that chocolate?”

“Cookie dough,” he corrects. “This girl I’ve been talking to ditched me.”

“Because?”

He prepares with a deep breath, steeling himself against whatever motive his fling had. “I’m a virgin.”

“What?” you ask dumbly. Virgin.

Chin tipped back, he swipes at his face in embarrassment. “I told you it's embarrassing.”

“You’re eating your feelings because you’re a virgin?”

“Yes.” He waits for your interjection. When it doesn’t come he hesitantly continues. “And the last person I told laughed in my face and started hooking up with my roommate. So…”

“What a bitch.”

“Yeah. People just assume I’m some kind of man whore.” He explains, head banging against the wheel. “But I’ve never done anything besides… ya know?”

“I have no idea, complete stranger.”

“Like hand stuff.”

“Yeah, you’re definitely a virgin,” you snort. “Move over, I’m coming up.”

Shimmying into the front seat takes more coordination than you’re prepared for. The hem of your dress rises to brazen heights, a draft curling around the edge of your panties. Its a feeling you assumed would be happening with your date and not in the car with a random stranger. But beggars can’t be choosers. At least it’s good ice cream.

He pointedly avoids looking anywhere close to your legs. Polite. Innocent. Virginal. How cute.

“Thank you. That makes me feel so much better.” His eyes roll as you settle into the passenger seat, snatching the container and taking a bite from the same spoon he’d been using. 

“Sorry,” you say after swallowing. “Is it because you don’t want to? Because that girl can go fuck herself then.”

“No, I just, I don’t know. I get nervous? They’re expecting someone who knows what they’re doing and I have no idea. And then all I can think about is what if I’m bad at it which makes me more nervous and then I feel like throwing up.”

“Please tell me you haven’t thrown up on a girl.” 

“Ew, no,” he laughs, taking a bite for himself. “I just make an excuse to slow down and then leave.”

“Okay. Well…” You try to think of something, anything, that could make him feel better. It’s not everyday a stranger spills their guts about lacking sexual experience. “So what if you’re bad? It’s not like you can’t get better.”

“Okay, but what girl wants to sleep with a guy who’s bad in bed?”

“How do you know you’re bad if you’ve never even tried? It’s different if you’re bad and you don’t care. Just tell whoever you're with you’ve never done it before. If they don’t jump at the chance to teach you then they can fuck off.”

“Well, Mina rubbed my face in it—”

“Oh fuck her. She seems like a bitch.”

“You’re not wrong,” he says. 

Rain drizzles on the windshield, obscuring the lights into messy streaks. A flood of memories surrounding your own virginity rush to the forefront.

Your college boyfriend, Jimin, wanted to wait. It was cute. High school sweethearts going to the same school, taking similar classes, holding hands in the library. You thought he wasn’t ready and you respected it, found it endearing that he wasn’t like most of the guys your friends dated that couldn’t wait to do it.

Or you did until you decided to surprise Jimin for his birthday with breakfast in bed and got your own surprise. A girl, naked in his bed, Jimin’s own clothes scattered around the room.

You broke up with him right there. Two days of crying later, you invited your lab partner, the one Jimin couldn’t stand, over.

It was Yoongi that sent a selfie of you two cuddled up in bed to Jimin. He still likes to cash in on that favor whenever he needs a dog sitter.

Yoongi knew there were no feelings involved. A simple favor in the form of revenge against a shitty ex. Maybe not-Ian is your chance to pay it forward. By the looks of things, you wouldn’t be suffering.

“Ya know, some girls like guys who are inexperienced. It’s hot knowing you can teach someone how to be good in bed. Like an ego boost.” You shrug. If he wasn’t looking at your legs before but he sure is now. Pink ears and round eyes, his fingers twitch in his lap as you suck the spoon clean. At least the hour spent shaving your legs isn’t going to waste. “Besides, you obviously care how the other person feels, which is more than some dudes.”

“Why would someone not care if the other person feels good?” he asks, tone laced with disgust. “That seems like the entire point.”

“The world is full of mysteries.”

“My name is Jungkook by the way.”

Jungkook. Fitting somehow. It tastes good on your tongue. Like the cookie dough ice cream.

“Y/N.”

You end up in his lap in true stereotypical fashion. A too long silence, his eyes on your mouth and yours on his. Someone leans forward and now you know Jungkook is a great kisser with even greater upper body strength.

His inexperience shows in the fine details: shaky hands, hesitant tongue, waiting for you to take the lead as not to offend. It’s endearing. Someone as big as him treating you with such gentleness. But it means he’s thinking about messing this up and that’s the opposite of what you want. 

You kiss him deeper, a grip on the side of his neck that he eagerly surrenders too. Your other hand wedges between your chests. Teeth nipping at his lip, you rock against him, palming against the soft cotton sweats until he’s plump in your hand. 

“God,” he chokes. His own hands busy themself on your body, one at the seat of your ass, teasing the edge of your dress where bare skin peaks out while the offers a tight grip at your chest, pinching your nipple in desperate retaliation.

“Feel good?” You rut again, a tease for your own pleasure in the form of Jungkook’s heavy breath. It’s decent contact on your core, not enough to get you off but plenty for right now.

Kissing is well in his realm of experience. Obvious from how quickly he finds his bearings, licking behind your teeth. It’s good. Better than dry humping his thigh in the front seat should be. Vision dark from his hands frantic at your ass, thighs rising to meet every torturous curl against the heat of his lap.

You fall into his shoulder, drool staining his sweater as you pant. “Ever had your dick sucked?”

“No.” 

A vein raises across his neck and becomes your new guidemap. Your hand at his crotch squeezes, his cock twitching at the action. “Do you want to?”

“You don’t have to,” he hisses. 

You squeeze his cock again, enough for a needy drive of his hips in response. “I want to.” 

“Seriously?” he marvels.

“If it’s cool with you.” You nose along his jaw, teeth scraping red over his skin. His stomach dips under your hand. “Get in the back, I don’t need to get caught with your dick in my mouth.”

“Holy shit, don’t say that.” He kisses you again, firmer this time. 

You crawl back through the narrow opening between the front seats, ass on full display for Jungkook’s eyes. The heat of his palm ghosts over your legs but he doesn’t touch. The deliberate arch in your spine isn’t enough to break his self control just yet.

He comes next. The struggle is endearing, half stuck between the seats and wiggling forward. “I think I’m stuck.”

“Why didn’t you just go around?” You snort, grabbing around his arms and pulling to no avail.

“Too late now.”

You're both laughing. Breathless because Jungkook is lodged between the seats with zero hope. “Why are you so heavy?”

He wiggles through with your help, nearly elbowing you in the head in the process. But he’s in the seat with his lap as prime real estate. You try to commandeer the space once again but Jungkook stops you. Instead, he settles between your legs, weight pinning you into the door. Broad shoulders block out the light but you take it in stride, fisting the back of his sweater as he finds your pulse.

“Can I go down on you?” He nuzzles down your throat, mouthing the spots he’s learning make you putty in his hands.

“Yeah, sure,” you hiccup. “That’s fine.” 

Jungkook crams between your legs, bending in half on the floor like a contortionist. The sparse kisses across your thighs would be a blatant tease if nervousness wasn’t rolling off him in waves. He’s eating pussy for the first time and acting like it’s open heart surgery.

“Calm down.” You brush a hand through his hair, attempting to be comforting. 

“I am calm.” A bold faced lie. Even in the darkness of the backseat the signs of his impending nerves are obvious. 

“You’re shaking,” you say. “I’ll tell you what feels good. You’re not gonna mess it up.”

An open mouth on your core kiss leaves you sweating with a weak hum. At least he knows where the clit is. Or has a vague idea of its presence. Jungkook presses his face further into the cotton, suffocating himself without realizing. 

“O-oh,” you hitch.

Humiliation brews from such a visceral reaction to something as basic as a kiss over your panties. But Jungkook is out of his depth here and any reaction will stroke his confidence. 

He ducks away, watching you with rapt attention. You’re the teacher and he’s a student eager for whatever validation that may fall from your lips. “Good?” 

“Yeah, do it again,” you praise. 

He nods before diving back in, throwing your legs over his shoulders for better reach. Your pulse jumps with juvenile eagerness. Like it’s the first time you’re left with a boy unsupervised and his hand is the first real thing to touch you between the legs. It makes you feel dirty. Has your hairline sweat and tongue go dry. A bold wash of his tongue couples the next kiss, hot and wet as he laps against the fabric until your own arousal mixes with spit. 

"You fucking liar,” you croak. The back of your head knocks against the window, hips rolling into his mouth.

"What?” Jungkook asks, leaning back but just barely. His breath fans over your skin, a shiver crawling up your spine. “Did I do something—" 

“It’s good. So good,” you praise. “Touch me more.”

He jumps at the chance. Your panties tear down your thighs, out of the way with some rough maneuvering. Bare for his eyes, Jungkook takes more than a fill before diving in for another taste. But not until he spits on your clit and rubs in the mess with his thumb. Your thighs spread wider to accommodate a hard pass of his mouth, more wet kisses burning your cheeks.

“Jungkook, fuck,” you sigh. “When you said ‘hand stuff’ what did you mean?”

“I’ve touched a vagina before if that's what you're asking.”

You swat his hand. “Don’t say vagina, it makes me feel like I’m at the gynecologist.”

“Sorry, a pussy.”

“Don’t say it like that either, weirdo. Have you fingered one?”

Pointed silence is answer enough.

“It’s okay. I’m not gonna make fun of you. Just don’t put a finger in my ass and you’ll be fine.”

He doesn't laugh at your poor attempt to cut the tension but he releases a weighted sigh, muscles sagging an inch. Better. Instead, he focuses on stroking you to life between your folds, fingertips nudging your bud teasingly. 

“Use your mouth some more and then finger me too,” you beg. 

“Uh—how many? I don't wanna hurt you." He’s unsure despite the obvious twitch in your thighs. It burns depravity through your veins. His innocence is hot. Jungkook doesn’t even realize how fucked up he has you from some softcore porn level touching.

"All of them. I don't care, I’ll tell you if it’s too much."

One hand firm on your stomach, keeping your dress out of the way as he spreads your insides with two. The first strokes are meek. Nothing to scream over but he’s learning and that’s what's important. Seconds tick by and Jungkook finds a hesitant rhythm. Wet noises echo with each slow sheath, reserved but stretching you all the same. The wet strokes of his tongue are there too, placating just in case. A soft curl of his fingers makes your hips cant into his mouth. 

The fogged windows are a dead give away to what's playing out in the backseat. If anyone stumbles down the sidewalk then you’re both dead but Jungkook’s mouth is distracting in the worst way.

And then he licks between his fingers, tongue slipping past his knuckles for a pure taste of your arousal. You go fuzzy at the edges, thighs squeezing tight until he’s forced to keep them spread or risk having his head crushed.

“Oh–fuck me, god.”

It’s not fair. For him to be good at this so quickly. To delude himself into thinking he could possibly be bad, trying to convince you he’d be bad. Complete unfair how ill prepared you were for Jungkook worshiping your pussy like he’s never tasted anything better.

He really needs to be more confident because, in the cramped back seat of his car, you’re losing your mind and it’s barely been ten minutes.

“Can I—” he asks around your clit.

“Do whatever you want, just don’t stop,” you ramble. “Jungkook, fuck.”

A hand of your own sinks into his hair, angling his chin for better access. Wet echoes fill the car, sharp mewls from your lips adding to the noise. Nerves blazing, your ride his mouth for all its worth. Eager slippery circles of his tongue against your clit intensify, built on praising moans of his name.

“Fuck. Tastes good,” he grunts. A squeeze of your hand, the one not pulling his hair and then he’s finding your chest, blind groping until you guide him to your nipple and curve into the sting of his grip. He twists it. Hard. 

You want to cry. The sweat suck of his mouth, fingers confidently curling it that spot that makes the air thinner in your lungs. Moans die between your teeth. Too quick into the next sensation to revel. There isn’t a thought other than Jungkook, Jungkook, Jungkook.

“Jungkook!” you cry, grinding into his fingers. Your teeth clench as a third one stretches that extra inch. Stiff in the thighs, you force yourself down into the friction. His tongue hardens, perfect for use as you hump his face weakly.

Your legs kick, scrambling under the sharp pleasure. He’s got you melting into nothing right on his carseat. Jungkook doesn’t lean back to ask for more confirmation; just takes the signs for what they are and keeps going with renewed stamina at the promise of your pleasure. 

“I’m gonna—oh, god. Yessss,” you hiss. Nails sharp against the back of his neck, Jungkook buries his face in your cunt. 

You go rigid, voice breaking into a desperate whimper. Jungkook has the sense to keep going, lashing at your clit over and over with each desperate pulse of pleasure through your veins. Flashes flare behind the darkness of your eyes squeezed tight. You make a few more desperate noises, lurching in his hold before falling lip and worn.

“Fuck, okay. Okay,” you whine, pushing him away from your core before the stimulation becomes too much.

His mouth is drenched, cheeks and chin smeared with your orgasm. A flash of tongue collects some of the mess but you drag him into a kiss before he can go for seconds. First time eating pussy and he’s one for one. If that doesn’t help his confidence then nothing else will. 

“Give me a second and I’ll blow you,” you pant into his lips. 

“I-it’s okay.”

You pout at the brush off, a deep kiss as you invade his space. “I promise I want to.”

Your hand goes for his pants just to be captured with his own. His fingers are still soaked from your insides. “No, I…I came too.”

“Really?” you ask in awe.

Jungkook is embarrassed again. “Sorry.”

“Don’t be. That’s hot.” You kiss him again with a gentle suckle along the curve of his lower lip. Jungkook drinks it in, crowding you back into the door again like you aren’t a pile of mush. Your back hurts from hunching over for so long but you let him keep you tangled up for a little while longer just to feel the shuddering exhale from his nose across your cheek. “Can I see?”

He swallows thickly before rolling down his sweats. The thin fabric of his boxers are wet, sticky under your shaky hand. You dip below the waist band, fingers grazing the limp ridge of his cock. He’s stuck in the inbetween of soft and hard but still hot and heavy in your hold. Your core throbs in interest at the feeling. 

Jungkook shivers as you swipe at the slit, collecting a bead of cum. You want to get your mouth on him but he looks like he might cry if you keep playing with it.

When your hand retreats, rising to your lips for a taste, his eyes round, mouth gaping over silent words. The pink of your tongue comes out, lapping at the thick mess coating your thumb. 

“Is it okay if I get your number?” he asks after the initial shock wears away.

“Yeah,” you snort. “You can have my number. You can give me a ride home too. And we can do that again in my bed.”

The glee on his face is worth the disgusting mess between your thighs. “Hell yeah.”

Taglist: @tomodachiii @cvpidyunho @miniseokminnies @ddaengpotate @arycutie

@gaebestie @primoppang @gyuguys @mine-gyu @doremifasire

@missminhoe @toplinehyunjin @crvs4vldtn @prettygyuuu @sliceofwoozi @writingbarnes

@dokyeomkyeom @christinewithluv @minwonfairy @idkjustlovingbts @wobblewobble822 @futuristicenemychaos

@seungkw1 @horanghaezone @jespecially @scoupsjin @isabellah29

@luvseungcheol @crisle19

© highvern. copying/reuploading/translating my work anywhere is strictly prohibited.

[acciocriativity]

-> When they reject you…

… but it wasn't a confession (MATZ Version)

Genre: angst (I'm sorry)

Warnings/tags: angst; unrequited love (?); Seonghwa being a little asshole; heartbreak; just betrayal guys

WC: 1,4 k

N/A: Yes, this is inspired by that Colin scene in Bridgerton, to be honest I still not forgave him for that.

Please reblog my work if you enjoyed it, it helps to reach other people <3

WOOSAN version

Ateez Masterlist

Park Seonghwa (박성화)

You had no reason to be up right now. Actually if anything, you should’ve been sleeping for hours now to rest for the early morning ahead of you, yet somehow you were still waiting to make sure he was safe and sound.

You heard them from the hallway, a combination of the dead silence in the building and their loud voices. You heard only sounds that didn’t make any sense to you, but it made you get up in hurry.

This isn’t good, there was something wrong with Seonghwa, you knew it.

The apartment was small, there wasn’t stairs to go down or a long way to cross to reach the door. In a few steps after you left your room, Seonghwa’s and Yunho’s voices became clear to you.

“Shh, keep your voice down, are you trying to wake everyone up?”, Yunho whisper-screamed, but his tone was far from angry, there was a residue of laughter on his voice.

“No”, he almost whined as you heard the constant jiggles from Seonghwa’s chains bag, like he was struggling against Yunho. “I told you I don’t want to live with her anymore, take me to the dorms for the night”.

That took you by surprise, you didn’t know what to do with yourself.

Ever since you two became roommates two years ago, he never gave you any signs that he needs some time away from your company, which would be completely okay, but to hear him say that to his friend made you feel so humiliated. You tried so hard to be friendly, to make him and all of his friends at home and all he did was pretend to do the same, welcoming you into his life.

Was this how he talked about you behind your back? Did they all know he hated living with you?

You feel something burning, maybe it was the bit of love for him, you had or the tears you refused to cry over this.

“Hyung, com’on, it's not that bad, you need to sleep and think clearly about this”, Yunho tried his best for a while, you could tell this wasn’t the first or second time he said those words.

They got closer to the door, only then you realized you were spying on them. If you were embarrassed before, now you felt mortified, but somehow you couldn’t move an inch.

What exactly made him feel uncomfy at home, because you were completely in the dark about those feelings, whatever they were. Did he seem off those days? You can’t remember, he was as sweet to you as he’s always been. But the man on the other side of the door was done, he was huffing and puffing like an immature child because he didn’t want to be at your home. The Seonghwa you thought was a friend couldn’t be more different than the man you are listening to right now.

“She is that bad”.

You breathe in.

There’s no way, absolutely no way.

“You should just tell her, y’ know”, Yunho said in that soft tone you hear more than once directed at you.

“I did”, Seonghwa raised his voice and that startles you. “She just doesn’t get the hint, I gave her too many signs to move on already”.

You don’t hear whatever answer Yunho gave him nor the sequential sounds of each number of the door code. You could only hear all the deep conversations you had together, where he told you he would be there for you anytime you needed, that he’d give a shoulder when you needed one. He was the one that made you open up to him and for what?

The door opened wide

They stood there like two idiots caught dirty-handed. Seonghwa couldn’t look at you in the eyes, a fucking coward he truly was. He was just like the others in your life, your worst nightmare became true.

There were tears pooling in your eyes as you closed more and more in your own head again, all of those months worth of improvement wasted.

Your mind screamed for you to move, to run out of there as fast as you could to as far as possible. But why should you? The voice in your head was bitter and angry. This was your apartment at first, even though you didn’t hesitate to call it ‘our’.

“Leave then, am I forcing you to live here with me? Did I even say I was interested in you? Get your shit by tomorrow night and get off my face.

You shut the door close on their faces.

Kim Hongjoong (김홍중)

The library wasn’t as empty as you wished it would be at 21:39, to study or do something near closing hours would be pointless for most, but you needed only more 79 words to finish your essay and your mama raised no bitch.

You watch the numbers change on your phone, exactly 20 minute from now you have to finish this. You’ve been here all evening, you can’t bring yourself to do it at home. No, you are going to finish this, get home, get a nice shower and re—

“I think you’re actually going insane, no offense though”.

You could recognize that voice anywhere. That fucker said he didn’t have time to study with you, again. Did he come to check on me? The thought crossed your head, but you shut it down just as fast, that wouldn’t make any sense, would it? He was ignoring you for a week now, no calls, no texts, nothing. Did he even know you were here? He would, if he saw the text you sent at noon.

You stared at your screen, the white was blurring your vision after so long. You took that as a sign to take a little 5-minute break.

Alright Hongjoong, this is your last chance to redeem yourself, this is the last time I’d bother to try.

You couldn’t see where he was from your seat, but his voice seemed to be coming from the sets of tables on the other side of the bookshelves. At the very least he deserved a little jump scare, he should have it coming as payback, so you don’t feel bad as you tiptoed to spy on where he was.

You moved a couple books to the side to see it better. He had his phone glued to his ear as he paced around. Distracted, as you needed, but the little mischievous demon on your shoulder disappeared as you paid close attention to his distressed disposition. There were few moments where you saw him so tense and stressed. Whatever the other person was saying, wasn’t good news.

“No, that’s… I see, but that makes it worse, no? I can’t tell her like this, hm…”

The lilac pencil case on top of the table distracted you from the big picture. The table was a mess from two people, the distinction was clear as day. Hongjoong wouldn’t be caught dead with anything other than black or red on his bag. It was clear it wasn’t his, so whose was?

The answer walked in with a concerned look on her face. Was that the ‘her’ in the conversation? He ended the call as soon as she got close. They stood near each other, too near for two people who just met.

“Are you sure she’s going to be okay?”, she leaned into him as if on instinct, a feeling you could relate to, he had something in him that attract people to him.

He took a deep breath. “I don’t know, I wish to keep a normal friendship with her someday”.

“It’s better to just call her, it’s been long enough for her to get over you”.

Is this ‘her’ me? You hoped not, whatever this was, you hated.

You felt sick to your stomach as they held hands, so you left Hongjoong alone, like he clearly wanted to. He wasn’t the type to open up to new people, she wasn’t new, and he never told you about it. There wasn’t secrets in your friendship, at least he said so, but there was a lot you don’t know, apparently.

If that’s you… if he was talking about you, did he just ignore you for almost two weeks because he thought you would get in the middle of his relationship?

You phone rang.

It was him, but you didn’t bother to answer, and he didn’t bother to try again. There’s nothing to salvage anymore.

Tag list: @h3arteyes4mingi

[perfectlyoongi]

SECOND-CHANCE!JIMIN who meets you by chance on the street and his whole heart screams for you.

SECOND-CHANCE!JIMIN who didn’t know if he should go talk to you. you hadn’t seen him yet. or... did you see him and pretend you didn’t recognize him? no. you weren’t capable of putting whole years of pure love and devotion behind you. yes, Jimin was confident that you hadn’t seen him yet. so this was Jimin’s chance to remake his entire story. but… would it be wise for Jimin to walk up to you and act like you guys don’t have a long shared love history? would Jimin be able to walk past you without acknowledging your existence when you were the carrier of all of Jimin’s essence? it was the first time in forever that Jimin had met you. you looked so… well. it was like you had never loved Jimin. how could you be okay when Jimin cried every night for you? how could you have forgotten everything you and Jimin went through? how could y—

SECOND-CHANCE!JIMIN who has never felt so nervous when pronouncing your name. no. you certainly still felt something for Jimin, even if it was the longing for your complicity that had sprouted long before any feelings were involved. therefore, Jimin took a deep breath, stole all the courage that the clouds held within him and approached you with uncertain and trembling steps. there was no turning back. when Jimin said your name, he swore it was the first time since you were gone that he was able to speak. your name was the only word that really made sense to say. and that afternoon, in front of the bakery, your name was enough to destroy all the progress Jimin had made trying to forget you.

SECOND-CHANCE!JIMIN who risked everything and invited you for coffee. but if he was already talking to you, if he already lost himself again in your bright gaze and your cordial smile, what else did Jimin have to lose? for old times’ sake, Jimin filled his chest with audacity and courage, the nervousness that was pounding in his heart covering up all his thoughts. but Jimin spoke. when the first awkward words were exchanged and that eerie silence hung over you, Jimin risked everything and simply invited you. the worst that could happen was that you would refuse. there was no longer any way to destroy Jimin’s heart, your refusal would only shake the small fragments of the heart that you had already broken. yes. Jimin would invite you. there was nothing left to lose. “i know it might not be ideal, but i would really like to buy you a coffee. for old times. do you want?”

SECOND-CHANCE!JIMIN who declared himself to you again at the end of your coffee. it felt magical the way your conversation flowed once you sat on the park bench sipping your hot drinks. it seemed like you and Jimin had never lost touch and that you continued to be that duo that made so many people jealous. for long minutes you talked about everything: what was new in your life, updates about family and career, little stories that made each other laugh or simply smile. on that park bench, between the comfort of hot drinks, you and Jimin spoke as if you had never lived an eternity without each other. on that park bench, between rescued smiles and regained laughter, you and Jimin had forgotten all the days alone and were completely involved in the present, in the now. and wrapped in this happiness, deceived by the false sense of security, Jimin spoke without realizing it, without being able to contain himself. “i have not forgotten you. i tried, i swear. i tried to forget you this whole time. but it seems that with each day spent away from you my love grew even more. it’s like missing you made me realize how much i really love you.”

SECOND-CHANCE!JIMIN who hugged you for an eternity when he heard your confession. you repeated the same words. you confessed to Jimin that you still felt love for him. you asked in fear for a second chance. you apologized for everything you did and didn’t say. you loved Jimin. you missed Jimin. you wanted Jimin, almost as much as he wanted you back. oh what a divine day that Jimin heard your words. on impulse, driven by days and months of need, Jimin just took you in his arms, pressing you against his chest, making you feel his heart that only beat for you. “what a relief i feel. it feels like i can breathe again after being drowned in a sea of heartbreak for months. how i love you. how i always loved you. how i will always love you.”

SECOND-CHANCE!JIMIN who will love you forever. finally, you returned to Jimin’s arms, and Jimin was determined to never let you go. living all those months in your absence, without knowing anything about you, was like experiencing purgatory without any hope of escaping. but now none of that mattered. now you returned to Jimin and Jimin entered paradise again. in your arms, bathed in your love, sprinkled with the beauty of your soul, Jimin lived each day as if it were the last time he could love you. in words, actions, silence and smiles, all the love that Jimin felt for you was shown without fear or regret, laying you down eternally on a long bed of pure love and devotion. “and may god be my witness that there will not be a day on this earth that i will not love you.”

[iowavampz]

𝓨𝓸𝓾 𝓰𝓮𝓽 𝓶𝓮 𝓼𝓸 𝓱𝓲𝓰𝓱🌿

You and elliot try molly together and start to get in the mood

pairing - Elliot x fem!reader

one shot length, 1.4k+ word fic

Rating: mature (18+)

Content/Trigger Warnings: unprotected sex, drugs, smut, fluff kinda

It was after school, and you were walking with Maddy and Kat. “I don't know why Nate is such a dick," Maddy said, rolling her eyes. "Yeah, he's super weird,” Kat said. "To be honest, I wish I had never dated him; it was the worst experience of my life," she muttered.

As you were about to chime in on the conversation, you got a text notification on your phone. It was from Elliot . You two had been hanging out outside of school in secret and had been communicating for a few weeks. “Meet me by my car at 5." "Who was that?” Maddy asks.

You quickly turned your phone off. "Oh, just my mom. I gotta go." You hugged Maddy and Kat, then scurried off before you were asked any other questions.

As you were walking to the parking lot, you immediately saw Elliot . He was lighting a cigarette. You smiled and walked over to him. "Hey," you said with a smile. "Hey,” he muffled the cigarette in his mouth.

“So what was it you wanted to talk about?” you said, leaning on the side of his car. “Oh yeah,” Elliot said while coughing. “Look what I got,” he said, pulling a bag with four pills out of his pocket. “It’s Molly. You in?” he said, smirking. “Fuck yeah,” you said, smirking back.

When you arrived at his house with Elliot , you got out of the car. He opened the door to his house. He bowed his head and curtsied, saying, "Ladies first." "Why thank you, good sir?" you chuckled. He laughed, and he followed you inside. You were grabbed by Elliot's hand as he brought you upstairs to his room. When he held your hand, something in your stomach churned, but you chose  to ignore it.

Elliot shut his door and laid down like a starfish on his bed. His place smelled like a combination of cocaine and marijuana. He was lying next to you as you lay on the bed. He looked to his left to observe you. "Have you done this before?" Elliot asked. "No, have you?" you asked, looking up at him. Nope. It's the first time for everything, right?" He asked as he stood up. You chuckled quietly.

Elliot took his laptop off the floor and pulled the bag of pills out of his pocket. He took a card off the bedside table and started to crush the molly. You sat up on his bed and watched his movements, then his lips, then back to his movements. ‘Pull it together, y/n.’ you said in your head.

"Done, there." Elliot took two straws out of his pillow case and gave you one. He said, "Here." He laid his laptop's lines of Molly down on the bed. As you kneeled in front of the lines, you exchanged glances. “Are you ready?  " he asked.You said, "Yes." After plugging one nostril hole and holding your straw, you both sniffed the lines.

After you guys were done, you and Elliot both laid on the bed, waiting for the molly to hit. For 10 minutes, you asked, “Do you feel anything?”. “Nah”. he said  You could feel a wave of euphoria slowly pass through your body as you let out a deep breath. You looked at Elliot and could see it was hitting him too. "Fuckkk,” Elliot said in a relaxing tone. You could feel your eyes getting heavy, and you noticed that you were blinking very slowly. Your heart started to slow down.

“Y’know y/n. Your very fucking pretty,” Elliot said while smlling. “Shut up!" you said with a big smile. “No, I'm serious,” Eltiot said, sitting up from his bed. He grabbed your jaw with both of his hands. His left thumb stroked your cheek, and he came closer. “You really are fucking pretty. Beautiful, I might say," Elliot whispered with a low voice.

He glanced at your lips, then back at your eyes. He came in closer. Your breath hit your throat, and your heart rate quickened. Elliot came closer to your lips and kissed you hard. You kissed back and pulled him in closer. “Is this okay?” he said. You nodded yes. “No I need words baby”  “yes” you said breathing heavily. He smirked. Elliot’s lips moved further. 

He pushed your shirt upwards. He stroked his tongue across your skin till you shook, kissing reverently and tenderly at every newly exposed spot of skin, including your stomach and breasts. While he was doing that, you stripped all your clothes off. You looked back up to see Elliot shirtless with his boxers. You could see the outline of his dick through his boxers. You bite your lips in horniness. “You like what you see,” he said with a low voice while smirking. You nodded while biting your lips.

 Elliot climbed over you and continued to kiss you going down and started to kiss your jaw to your neck, leaving hickeys. You started to moan as he went down to your pussy. “Fuckk” you moaned, biting your lips. He slowly started to lick your clit up and down, leaving you a moaning mess. He put his finger in his mouth to get them wet.

 Elliot  then slowly started to play with your clit. You arched your back and bit your lip. He shoved his fingers in your wet pussy. "Come on, baby, tell me what you want," he said, causing you to clench around his fingers with his smooth voice. He gave me another clit kiss. This time, his lips touched your flesh directly, causing me to moan louder. Your juices were visible on his smooth, pink lips. 

“Uhhh fuck Elliot. I'm about to cum.” As soon as you said that, Elliot pulled away. His lips and chin wet from your juices. You groaned in frustration. “The only time you're cumming is on my dick.” he said, smirking. He pulls away from you by pulling his boxers off. Your eyes widen as you see his cock pop out of his boxers, and he hasn't taken his eyes off of you for even a single second.  

At least spits on his hand and strokes his dick for a few times while making eye contact. Elliott taps his dick on your pussy. “Are you ready for me baby?” he asked. “Yes Elliot. Please fuck me.” you said almost whining.  He took hold of your face and raised it. He kissed you once more and teased your entrance, saying, " good girl."  He allowed you to adjust to his size before slowly thrusting inside of you. "You're so fucking tight Y/n ," he moaned. 

He repeatedly thrust slowly till you gave him a little nod in agreement. He began to rock his hips more rapidly. As he fucked you, neither of you cared to cover up your groans. He clawed your hips while you clawed at his back. 

“Fuck I can't get enough of you y/n .” he said putting his head back. You bit your lips in pleasure while gripping his sheets. His rhythm continued even when he was close. His fingers making small circles on your clit so you could come faster, but your previous actions had gotten that covered already. Elliot kept his pace, muttering sweet nothings into your ear. One of his hands tangled up in your hair, pulling your head back so he could kiss you as he brought both of you closer to 𝑒𝓊𝓅𝒽𝑜𝓇𝒾𝒶.

You felt the rush of excitement again after a few more thrusts. You loudly moaned his name as you leaned your back towards him. Your toes curl, and you pull yourself out of the kiss with a loud moan. He has to wrap his arm around your back to keep you standing as your climax tears through you, all the while his thumb and hips moving in the same direction. "I swear to God, Elly. “Shit, baby. God”. Elliot continues to push himself over the edge with the same thrusts, lowering his head to the back of your neck. “Fuck im gonna-” Elliot pulls out and cums in on your stomach. “Ugh fuckk Y/n.” 

You both are now breathing heavily. Elliot gets off you and walks to the bathroom. ‘Where's he going?’ you wonder. Elliot comes back with a rag and wipes you off. He throws it into the dirty clothes and lays down beside you. 

 “You feel like a fucking drug Y/n” “what do you mean?” you asked him. “I mean ever since I met you. I feel a relaxed and calm, I feel weird when i’m not around you and if were being honest, your the only person I fuck with. What I'm trying to say is, I like you Y/n.” 

You immediately smiled from what he said. "I like you too Elly." Elliot smiled and kissed you, you kissed back. After cuddling in his bed, you could feel your eyes getting low while falling to sleep. Sleeping in Elliot's arms. 

[supernovafics]

𝐀𝐔𝐆𝐔𝐒𝐓

pairing: steve harrington x fem!reader

word count: 6.3k words

summary: in which the summer of ‘84 was both the best and worst time of your life

warnings: explicit language, underaged drinking, angst, fluff, implied smut, cheating

author’s note: second part to cardigan (but could be read out of order). i fully did not expect this to end up this long but hope y’all enjoy<33 (full “folklore” album series masterlist here!)

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

“but i can see us lost in the memory. august slipped away into a moment in time.”

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

July 19, 1984

Ten. 

That was how many days in a row you and Steve had seen each other. 

From the first time you two talked to one another outside of Ralph’s Sandwich Shop, his first ever words to you being, “Potato chips on a sandwich? That’s kinda weird,” and the conversation that proceeded from that somehow led you to watching a movie in the theater room at his house that same night. To now this— him spending the majority of his afternoon with you at the library, where you had been working for the past year and a half. 

You wondered how long the two of you would keep the streak alive. 

If it was anyone else you probably would have gotten sick of seeing them that many days in a row, but with Steve you weren’t. In fact, you looked forward to whenever you got to see him again. And maybe that feeling, the anticipation toward seeing this guy who you probably shouldn’t even be seeing this often anyway, should’ve worried you. 

Whenever you thought about how easily the two of you were able to go from absolutely nothing to this— an unlikely friendship that somehow felt like you’d known each other so much longer than barely two weeks— it startled you. 

Before, you had simply known of him; of course, you had, he was practically royalty at your high school. “King Steve,” a charmer, a perpetual flirter, somehow dating straight-A student Nancy Wheeler. It was the combination of those things that told you during that first conversation you had with him that you should stay away from him, but for some reason, you still said yes. 

Maybe it was because the home theater he had been bragging about sounded way too tempting not to take up the offer. Or maybe it was because you liked being an idiot sometimes. 

If it was the latter that was true then you still were an idiot because there you were ten days later still hanging out with him and not regretting it one bit. 

“I need to bring you better games here,” Steve said. He was standing across from you on the other side of the counter. 

“What’s wrong with Uno? Is it because you keep losing?” You jokingly asked, a small smile on your face as you started shuffling the deck. “Also, I’m technically working right now, so I shouldn’t even be playing any games with you.”

“There’s no one here except you and me,” He said and then gestured to the quietness that surrounded you both. “Actually, I think the only other person that’s been in here all day was that old lady who just wanted directions to the park.”

You loved your job at the library and you really didn’t mind how it was rarely busy, especially during the summer, because it meant that you could spend most of your shifts reading instead of helping someone find what they needed or reshelving books. Now the majority of your non-busy moments during your shift were spent with Steve. 

“What are you doing tonight?” He asked as you began dealing the cards, because what else was there to do but play another round of Uno? 

“My guess is hanging out with you,” You answered. “What’s happening?” 

“Party,” He stated simply, and you realized that probably should’ve been your first guess. “Need us to be beer pong partners again.” 

It had been last week, two days after you and Steve unspokenly decided that hanging out with one another would become a common occurrence, when he dragged you to a party; some too big thing at Matthew Lancaster’s lake house. 

A beer pong table was set up, which was not all surprising for a high school party, and you suggested that you and Steve play and be on a team with one another. You were insanely good, practically making every shot, and Steve wasn’t too bad at playing either, which made your team pretty unstoppable. It was a random hidden talent of yours that you would only show off every once in a blue moon because you deliberately didn’t frequent parties. 

“I’ve retired for the time being,” You told him. “I can’t show off my beer pong skills too often or it won’t be a cool talent anymore.”

He laughed a bit at that but still nodded. “Okay, what do you wanna do tonight instead?” 

“Don’t let me stop you from going to the party.”

Steve shrugged and shook his head. “Probably wouldn’t be fun without you, anyway.”

His words confused you as much as they made you feel so happy. And you quickly pushed that “happy” feeling away because you knew just how fast it could lead to feeling other things; things that would make you look like the worst person in the world.

Once again, you wondered why you were doing this. Why were you allowing yourself to get close to him when you’d probably just look like an idiot in the end? And why had he wanted to talk to you in the first place? Those fleeting questions would hit you a lot over the past few days, but you’d quickly push them away because you didn’t want to think too hard about everything. However, this time you couldn’t force them away. 

“Why?” You asked, breaking eye contact with him for the first time probably that entire afternoon. “Why… are we friends right now?”

If he was surprised or confused by the randomness of your question, he didn’t show it. 

“I don’t know. I wanted to talk to you that day, so I did it,” He made the answer sound so simple. “I didn’t really expect it to turn into this friendship, but it’s nice finally having something that actually feels so easy.”

What about you and Nancy wasn’t easy? 

You wanted to ask that but refrained from doing so. He probably didn’t mean her when he said that. You knew that the only reason why he was with you instead of her, and had been for the past ten days, was because she was out of town for the summer. That thought hurt a bit, knowing that you were essentially some sort of “consolation prize,” but it kept you from looking too much into things. You took everything Steve said that could be read as flirtatious with a grain of salt and forced yourself to see it as solely platonic. 

And you’d rather it all be completely platonic anyway because you really liked the friendship you’d developed with him. 

“You’re right. This does feel easy,” You ultimately responded, smiling at him because now that the unspoken lines were finally verbally drawn— the two of you were friends; nothing more, nothing less— you felt the tiniest bit better about it all. “But, I’m glad it does. I’m happy we’re friends.”

Steve smiled back at you. “Me too.” 

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

“you back beneath the sun. wishin’ i could write my name on it.”

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

July 28, 1984

The only reason why you allowed Steve to bring you to this party was because you were a sucker for a bonfire. 

And the only reason why you were currently drunk off your ass was because you couldn’t say no to a game of hide and seek, especially a drinking version of the childish game, which Steve had suggested and you quickly agreed to. 

There was something about this game that made you realize that maybe your entire friendship was a game; a game of who would break first. But, that was something to think about at a different time. Or actually not at all, because thinking further about that would probably only complicate things. 

It was easy to pretend that there was nothing more to you and him when you both were sober. It was also so much easier to lie to yourself that you didn’t feel anything romantic toward him and that you didn’t see that maybe he actually felt the same way too.

There was a constant back and forth happening in your mind, with you continuously telling yourself that being friends with Steve wasn’t a bad idea, even though maybe it was because it was slowly making you want something more. Sometimes it felt as if it made sense to like him; it felt obvious. The way you could talk to each other about anything and everything mixed with how constantly you two wanted to spend time together made you fall in so deep so fast. 

But, you couldn’t accept or think about any of that, and the reasons why were painfully obvious. 

However, with the alcohol currently clouding your brain, that felt like a slightly different story. 

“Sitting behind a tree? Not your best hiding spot.”

Hearing Steve’s voice right then should’ve made you feel at least the tiniest bit upset because it meant that you lost that round of hide and seek, but you drunkenly smiled up at him. 

“I wanted to be original and we’ve been playing for so long I feel like we’ve done everything else at this point. But, that was at least two minutes, though, right?”

“It was actually barely thirty seconds.”

“Oh, wow,” You said with a laugh as you extended a hand up toward him so that he could help you up. You wobbled a bit before getting your balance and then you grabbed the red solo cup in Steve’s free hand to drink the rest of what was left in it as your punishment for losing; the exact contents of the drink were unknown, but it tasted fruity. 

When you were done, you handed the cup back to him and then leaned back against the tree because it somehow felt nice and you weren’t bothered by the roughness of it touching the parts of your skin that the tank top you were wearing didn’t cover.

There were a ton of people at the infamous “Lover’s Lake” because of the party, but nobody had been paying attention to you and Steve running around like five-year-olds playing hide and seek and getting severely drunk in the process.  

The lopsided grin taking over Steve’s features let you know that he was just as inebriated as you were, maybe even more so because he’d been drinking a bit before you two started the game. 

“Maybe we should be done with hide and seek now.”

You gave him a nod. “That sounds like a good idea.” 

Things became quiet for a few moments with the two of you solely staring at each other in the darkness and ignoring the loud rowdiness of everyone else who was only a few feet away. Steve closed a bit of the distance between you both and leaned in close to you; his gaze flickered down to your lips for a hint of a second before going right back to your eyes.  

If this was any other moment, your mind would be running a million miles a minute, screaming at you to not allow the inevitable to happen. But, somehow, you were actually calm. 

“We can’t do that, friend,” You told him, making your voice sound as serious as possible, but you couldn’t help but smile a bit. 

“I know,” He responded but still shut the final space of distance between you both, bypassing your lips and kissing your cheek instead. “That’s okay, though, right?”

The reasonable side of you was obviously telling you to say “no,” but it was hard to make yourself care enough to listen to it. “I’ll allow it.”

The three words came out so quietly, but Steve heard you. He kissed your other cheek and then your forehead and then your nose before pulling away and smiling at you. 

Before he could say anything, you did the same to him; kissing both of his cheeks, his forehead, and his nose, and then pulling back to lean against the tree again. That time it was your eyes that glanced down at his lips before going back to his eyes. 

You were so close to doing it, and he almost begged you to, but then you were pushing off of the tree and asking him to turn around. 

“Piggyback ride to the car, please?”

“We can’t drive right now,” He said as he leaned down a bit so you could hop onto his back. 

You nodded even though he couldn’t see you. “I know, but I will die if I don’t sit down.”

The walk to your car should’ve taken less than a minute, but instead, it nearly took five because, of course, the two of you got a little lost and it took way too long to realize that the first car you had walked past was yours. 

“God, we’re acting like such idiots right now,” You said, laughing as Steve let you down so you could get into the car. 

He laughed too as he got in on the passenger side. “Yeah, definitely not our finest moment.”   

You sighed in contentment when you leaned back against the seat, immediately finding comfort in it, which definitely said a lot about how drunk and exhausted you were because you never usually found your car as super comfortable. 

You turned on your side to face Steve, and as if feeling your gaze on him, he turned to look at you as well. You silently admired each other. Sometimes it felt as if a thousand things were being said in the silences you two shared with one another, things that would probably always be left unsaid. 

“I really like you,” He whispered suddenly and you realized that maybe not everything silently said would be left unspoken. 

You let out a small breath before closing your eyes because it felt too hard to look at him right then. “I really like you too.”

“Please let me kiss you.”

It was difficult to describe exactly what his words managed to do to you, and you tried your hardest to disregard those feelings. 

“We can’t.” You shook your head, eyes still shut. “It’ll ruin everything.”

“What if that’s okay?” He said, voice still quiet. 

It could’ve been easy.

To finally do what you both had desperately wanted to do for weeks at this point, but had refused to admit. And doing it at this moment instead of any other time because, with the drunken states you both were in, none of this would be remembered. Which would also mean that it didn’t really happen, right? 

Your eyes finally opened and you looked at him. “Neither of us is gonna remember this conversation in the morning.”

“You’re probably right.”

“And if you did, you’d regret saying any of this,” You said, and your words were met with silence from him. You couldn’t tell if that meant that they were the truth, or instead, quite far from it. 

Even in your inebriated state, you were too scared to push him further and get an answer because you were unsure which response would be worse; “Yes, I’d regret it,” or “No, I wouldn’t regret it at all.”

Before he could potentially say a version of either of those responses, you began speaking again. “I’m really tired.” 

You then pulled your eyes away from him and looked straight ahead at the people that were still partying around the fire. A part of you wanted to join them, but the other part of you just wanted to fall asleep. 

“Me too,” Steve said and with how long he had been quiet, you were actually surprised to hear his voice right then.

Both of you fell asleep just like that for the time being, putting an end to a conversation that would not be talked about in the morning because just as you’d both assumed, it seemed as if it had been long forgotten.

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

“salt air, and the rust on your door. i never needed anything more. whispers of ‘are you sure?’ ‘never have i ever before.’”

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

July 31, 1984

The sun had long ago set behind the trees, but you and Steve still had no plans to leave his pool anytime soon. 

You swam close to him, your hands finding his shoulders and then pushing down to dunk him under the water. A laugh fell from your lips as you immediately started swimming away, but Steve’s hand quickly found your waist and pulled you back toward him.

“What was that for?” He asked, one arm still wrapped around you, causing your back to be firmly pressed against his chest, while his other hand pushed back his wet hair. 

“For pushing me in the pool earlier,” You answered, only trying for a moment to wriggle out of his grasp but failing miserably so you stopped. 

“That was hours ago.”

“Revenge is best when you don’t see it coming,” You said, smiling widely. 

He laughed against your ear. “You’re evil.” 

You attempted to pull away again but he was still holding on to you, so instead you maneuvered so you were simply facing him instead. 

You were smiling up at him, and you assumed he’d match it with a smile of his own, but he didn’t. Instead, there was a certain look on his face that you couldn’t necessarily decipher. You almost asked him what was wrong, but he started speaking before you got the chance to.

“I remember the conversation we had in your car at the bonfire.”  

You could feel your heart start to race a bit, not expecting things to take that turn. “Oh… You do?”

He nodded his head. “Do you?”

“I remember the whole thing,” You told him, and that was entirely true. You’d spent the past few days constantly thinking about that moment and running through every single thing that was said. You had also tried your hardest to push the memory away because it seemed as if Steve didn’t remember it. 

“I don’t regret anything I said,” He told you and then a hand came up to cup your cheek. “I still really wanna kiss you.”

You were quiet for a moment, letting Steve’s words settle over you, before responding to him in a small voice. “Are you sure?”

Instead of verbally responding, he gave you the smallest of nods and closed the tiny bit of space between you both, dipping his head down and slotting his lips against yours. 

All you could think at that moment was finally.  

Finally, you were this close to one another.

Finally, you were kissing.

Finally, you were doing what you had wanted to do for so long.

The thing that both of you told each other and even convinced yourselves wasn’t going to happen, finally happened. And in a way, it sucked because neither of you felt bad about it, at least not bad enough to stop. 

Your legs wrapped around his waist beneath the water and your arms came up to wrap around his neck, one hand finding its way into the hair at the nape of his neck.

You weren’t in the deepest part of the pool anymore so Steve was able to stand, but both of you were still almost completely submerged in the water. He walked you both over to one of the sides of the pool, pressing you back against it and deepening the kiss. 

Nothing was said, and nothing needed to be said. In fact, you thought that if either of you said something, it would ruin the perfection that was that moment and harshly shove you both back to reality. A reality that told you that this was the farthest thing that should have been happening. 

For the time being, with Steve against you and his lips finding that particularly sensitive part of your neck, you were happy living in this fantasy world. It was a dream that you didn’t want to wake up from, and you convinced yourself that it wouldn’t hurt too bad when you did finally have to wake up from it. 

“We should…” You took a breath, biting back the moan that threatened to spill from your lips as Steve continued the assault on your neck. Your next word should’ve been “stop,” but stopping this was the absolute last thing you wanted to do. “We should go to your room.” 

He finally, and sadly, pulled away from your neck and pressed a quick kiss against your lips. “That sounds like a great idea.”

You detached yourselves from one another just enough to step out of the pool and into his house, wet bodies leaving drops of water across the floor that weren’t the slightest bit cared about. 

You couldn’t keep your hands off of each other.

After getting as close as you just had been, it was hard to go back to how it used to be; the friendliness and innocence that had surrounded the brief touches you two would usually share. Instead, your hand was intertwined with his as he led you up the stairs, and then his arms circled around you when you entered his room, cocooning you in the towel he’d grabbed from behind his door. 

It was you that kissed him that second time. 

You reached up to push his wet hair back and then leaned in, inwardly sighing in contentment. Both of his hands found your waist, causing the towel to fall and it was immediately long forgotten. 

When you pulled away you took the smallest step back and simply looked at him, his pretty face and soft brown eyes that were full of nothing but adoration for you. You tried your hardest to find something within you that resembled regret or made you want to stop this, but you couldn’t. And you knew exactly what that said about you, but it was also difficult to force yourself to care about that either. 

Steve eagerly brought you close to him again, which made you smile into the kiss he pulled you into. He slowly started leading you back toward his bed.

“Wait,” You said, detaching your lips from his and softly pushing him back a bit. “It would be really rude of me to lay on your bed with my bathing suit on.”

He slowly nodded and swallowed harshly as you removed your top first, letting that fall to the floor, and then going to your bottoms. “That’s very considerate of you.” 

You only smiled at him and his sudden nervousness, which managed to wash away any and all of your own shyness at that moment. 

His eyes met yours. “You’re so fucking pretty.” 

“You’re not too bad yourself,” You whispered, reaching out to grab his hands and pull him close to you again. You were about to kiss him again, but it was then that you noticed the time on the clock that was hanging on the wall behind him. “Shit, shit.”

His eyebrows furrowed in confusion and a look of concern crossed his face. “What’s wrong?”

“The time,” You answered and then sighed as you started grabbing your bathing suit. “It’s 12:40, and if I’m not home by one, my mom will kill me and then you.” 

“Your mom loves me too much to kill me,” Steve responded, grabbing a t-shirt for you to slip on too. 

“Yeah, kinda weird how after only one meeting where you two barely even talked, she somehow likes you more than me now,” You said as you put on his shirt which kind of swallowed you whole but you loved it and already knew that you would never be giving it back to him.  

You looked up at him and your next words came out quietly. “I’m sorry I have to ruin this right now.” 

Steve shook his head at you. “It’s okay. Don’t be sorry.” Both of his hands found your hips again, squeezing softly. “We’ll pick up where we left off next time.” 

You couldn’t help but smile at that. “Next time?” 

“Mhm, next time,” He said, smiling back at you and nodding. “If you want there to be one?”

“I’d like that,”  You responded and pressed a quick kiss against his lips. 

Even as you headed back downstairs and Steve walked you to your car, kissing you for a few more minutes before you reluctantly drove away, your stomach had yet to fill with even a hint of regret or guilt. 

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

“wanting was enough. for me, it was enough. to live for the hope of it all.”

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

August 12, 1984

The constant sound of something softly pinging against your window pulled your attention away from the book you were reading in your bed. 

There was only one person that could've been throwing something at your window, but still, you were the tiniest bit surprised when you opened your curtains and saw Steve standing on your front lawn. 

Even though seeing him was such a natural thing at this point, it made sense that you were at least a little surprised because no part of you felt secure with this “thing” you had going on with him, which was more than just a friendship but so much less than any type of actual relationship. You lived in the perpetual state that it would all abruptly end. And maybe that thought process came from you knowing that eventually, this would all have to come to an end; there weren’t that many days of summer left. 

But then there was that tiny slither of hope that maybe it all wouldn’t have to end. You kept that thought buried deep down inside of you, though. 

You lifted your window. “Throwing rocks at my window? That’s very rom-com of you.”

“Sometimes I like to be cheesy,” Steve said, smiling at you. 

It was a sweet, adoring smile that you shouldn’t have been on the receiving end of; it was a smile that didn’t belong to you. It was so easy to see that, but it was nearly impossible to actually do something about it and let him go.

“Can I come up?” He asked. “I promise I’ll be quiet and your mom won’t hear me.” 

“She’s gone for the weekend, actually,” You told him, smiling a bit. “I’ll be down in a second.”

When you opened the front door, he was quick to greet you with a kiss before pulling you in for a hug. 

After that first kiss in his pool, there was an almost immediate shift that happened. An easy shift where you’d gone from constantly telling yourselves that everything was solely platonic to finally allowing yourselves to do every little thing that deep down you both had always wanted to do. With him now always greeting you with soft kisses, and you secretly spending so many nights in his bed because his parents were never home and most of the time it was easy to make up some sort of excuse to your mom. 

Something else shifted too, though. It was a shift that neither of you spoke about because you never really wanted to acknowledge what exactly your friendship had transformed into and what it really meant. Not talking about any of it was a decision that you were unsure if it was completely yours or his because it was all so unspoken. 

When you thought about it hard enough though, you could see that the decision was mutual, because on both sides it was easier to pretend that none of the outside things existed. In that fairytale, he didn’t have a girlfriend, he didn’t belong to anyone else. You were his and he was solely yours. 

“Tell me about this thing that your parents forced you to go to tonight,” You said as Steve kicked off his shoes by the front door and the two of you started heading up the stairs. One of his hands was intertwined with yours and there was barely an inch of space between you both. It had become really hard not to be close to one another.

“It was this big event for my dad’s job, and they always drag me to stuff like that as a way to prove to his coworkers that they’re ‘good parents.’ It was very boring,” Steve responded with a small sigh and then gave your hand a light squeeze. “It would’ve been much less painful if you came.”

He sat down on the foot of your bed when the two of you walked into your room, and the oversized t-shirt you had on as your pajamas rode up a lot as you settled yourself in his lap, knees on either side of his thighs and hands resting on his shoulders. It was an un-innocent position that, for the time being, felt quite the opposite. 

“Going to something like that is something a girlfriend would do, not…” That was the first time you’d even minorly referred to Nancy, and it felt both weird and wrong. It woke you up for a second and made you falter a bit in your next words, breaking Steve’s gaze. “Not a… friend.” 

One of his hands found the side of your thigh, rubbing the skin softly and trying to pull you back into this moment with him. You could feel him reading you so easily and knowing where your mind was going, and he didn’t want you to go there, and neither did you. 

You didn’t want this– you and him, him and you– to break just yet.

“Um, anyway, you didn’t tell me that it would be so formal,” You said, gesturing with your head to the suit he was wearing. 

Your eyes met his again and you could see the relief wash over his face because you didn’t bring up the unspoken topic. Things shifted right back to normal. Well, the normal that you two created for yourselves. 

“I feel kinda ridiculous, and I hate this bow tie,” He responded, hand continuing to rub your thigh. “I should’ve probably changed before I came here but I just really wanted to see you.”

You let his words further push away any thoughts of Nancy that lingered in your mind, thoughts that finally told you that what you were doing with him was wrong.

“Stop. You look good,” You told him, your fingers playing with the bow tie for a brief moment. “Like, really good.” 

“Okay, now I’m really glad that I didn’t change, then.” He smiled before leaning in to kiss you. 

You only deepened the kiss in response and focused on nothing but the feeling of his mouth on yours and his hands beginning to snake underneath your shirt. 

He pulled back, maneuvering things so you were sitting at the foot of the bed and he was standing. The black suit jacket he had on was the first thing to fall on the floor. You slipped your t-shirt over your head and tossed it to the side before helping him unbutton the long sleeve white shirt he had on. 

His hands found your bare waist and squeezed softly. “I’m so fucking happy I’m here right now.”

“Me too,” You responded and then sighed in contentment, eyes slipping shut for a brief moment, when you felt his thumb graze over your already hard nipple. 

Sometimes, usually in moments like these, it felt as if it was your sole purpose to be with him; canceling your plans just in case he’d call or show up, and meeting solely at his place, or yours, or the library.

How deeply intertwined you felt with him let you know exactly how much it would hurt when this all came to its eventual end. But then you were hit with the thought that maybe you would deserve it because you put yourself in this situation. 

Steve’s hand came up to gently stroke your cheek and pull you out of your thoughts. “What are you thinking about?”

Your gaze met his as you shook your head. “Nothing important.”

But, maybe it was the most important thing. 

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

“i remember thinkin' i had you.”

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

August 23, 1984

You expected to see him that night. 

So maybe him unexpectedly showing up to the library– which was now busy with a bunch of kids scrambling to do their summer reading assignments– was what should have told you that everything was about to go to shit. 

“Hey,” You said to him and placed the book in your hand in its rightful place on the shelf and then did the same thing with the other one you were holding. “I didn’t think I’d see you until tonight.” 

Steve was quiet for a few moments too long, which made you look at him, and your eyebrows furrowed in confusion when you saw the look on his face. It was hard to exactly decipher his expression because it looked as if he was experiencing a thousand different emotions at once. 

“What’s wrong?” You asked, voice quiet. 

“I got a call from Nancy,” He told you, and you nearly flinched at hearing him saying her name to you for the first time ever. “She said she’s coming back tonight.” 

“Oh…” Was the first thing that fell from your lips. It was the word that perfectly encompassed your initial shock at that moment. “That’s, um– That’s really, uh…” You almost said “great,” because if the circumstances were different and if things were actually normal between you two, it probably would’ve been great that his girlfriend was coming back after being gone for almost two months. But, things were far from normal and the circumstances weren’t different at all, so you were at a loss for words.  

Finally, after what felt like hours of silence, but what was really probably only seconds, you said something. “I really don’t know what to say to that, honestly.” 

“I’m sorry,” He said softly and pulled his eyes away from you. He looked down and ran a nervous hand through his hair. “I guess we, uh, both know what that means.” 

“Say it, Steve.” You muttered. You had to hear him say the words in order for it all to be real for you. You couldn’t take all of the unspoken, reading-between-the-lines bullshit. 

He was quiet for an unbearable amount of time before he finally spoke. “We can’t see each other anymore.” 

From the second he kissed you in his pool nearly a month ago, you knew that those words would ultimately come. Each happy day that passed with you tangled up in his bedsheets or cuddled up on his couch laughing about nothing was leading to this moment. 

It had all been so inevitable, but it still hurt harder than you had expected it to. You quickly decided to pretend as if it didn’t, though. 

You nodded at him. “Okay. Got it.” 

“I’m sorry. This shouldn’t– I didn’t–”

“Don’t,” You quickly shook your head, not at all wanting to hear whatever pitying thing he would say to you at that moment. “Please don’t.” 

You were suddenly glad that you were at work right then because you could distract yourself from thoughts of him and everything that had just ended with the current busyness of the library. You looked away from Steve and noticed a little girl struggling to grab a book that was high on a shelf.

“It’s really chaotic here right now, and I have to actually do work for the first time probably all summer, so yeah…” You forced a small smile and then walked away from him, ignoring the words he said to you that you barely heard and couldn’t make out. 

Over the next two final hours of your shift, you’d silently accepted that that brief conversation would be the last time you talked to Steve Harrington. Although there were a thousand more things that probably could’ve been said, it was okay. That ending was okay. Or at least in the long run, it would be. 

So it slightly startled you when you saw him in the parking lot, leaning against the side of his car. When he noticed you, he waved. 

“Have you been here this whole time?” You asked, walking toward him, but leaving a wide space of distance between you two. 

“Maybe, yeah.”

“Why?” 

“I don’t know…”

For the first time probably ever, he confused you. 

“I just— I wish things could be different,” He ultimately said, and hearing those words simultaneously made you feel happy while also making you feel so fucking upset. 

“Things can be different,” You told him as you stepped toward him, the tiniest glimmer of hope inadvertently beginning to swirl in your stomach. “We could be together.”

Your hands found his, slowly intertwining them. His gaze met yours and you let the silent conversation play out. Your eyes pleading with him to not let go of what you two had, and him looking at you so softly while also battling whatever else was going on in his mind. After a few moments, he gave your hands a quick squeeze before he let go of them. 

“I love Nancy.”

Not you. Those were the words he didn’t say, but you could read between those lines a little too easily. 

“I love you” was the one thing you hadn’t said to one another, but you thought that you could feel how much he loved you through each soft touch, every longing look, every plea for you to stay in his bed for just a minute longer; one minute that always turned into at least five. 

Apparently, you were wrong, though. 

And now you knew for certain that you were wrong about every single thing that happened that summer. 

Because you knew that you felt that way toward him. You loved him. 

But he didn’t love you. He didn’t want to be with you. 

He loved her. 

His girlfriend— the only girl he was supposed to love. 

You let the feeling of regret and guilt toward everything that happened this summer crash over you like a tsunami. 

“I should’ve never done this,” You said, whispering that more to yourself, than to him. 

“What?” He asked, unsure of what you’d just said.

“You love her.” You said as you moved away from him. “Go be with her.”

“I’m really sorry,” You heard him say as you walked toward your car. 

You didn’t say anything in response to that. Mainly because there was nothing to say, but also because you refused to talk to him any longer. And quite frankly, you never wanted to talk to him again. 

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

“so much for summer love and saying ‘us.’ ‘cause you weren't mine to lose.”

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

let me know ur thoughts<333

(read “betty” here!)

[yuriririnnie]

Is it love?

A/N: It’s literally 1:51 in the morning and I’m supposed to be studying my last few topics on Tax Law. I really should be focusing, but sometimes don’t you hate it when you have this idea in your head that you just need to let out otherwise you’ll go insane? Yup. So that’s today for me.

PAIRING | Park Jongseong (Jay) x reader

WC | 2.8k (wth Alice?!)

GENRE | angst, fluff

WARNINGS | mentions of drinking, explicit language, mentions of sex and pre-marital cohabitation 

SYNOPSIS | When you first met, he didn’t believe it was love. When you fight for the first time though, that’s when it hit him.

—

Maybe it was the alcohol that’s making your head throb so incredibly hard right now but you were sure that it wasn’t this painful when you came in here. You were having the worst week of your law school life because of upcoming midterm examinations, terrifying judges as professors, and mock trials so you actually allowed your friends to pull you out of your dorm, go to a bar, and loosen up. 

At least, that was the plan. 

“Why are you being so uptight even until now?” your best friend asks before sipping on her drink which mind you, was the exact same drink that made your head ache so bad tonight. God has it been a while since you went out. 

Trying not to throw up you say, “How are you guys holding your alcohol so well? We’ve been here for three hours.” 

“You just haven’t been drinking that’s all.” 

“I shouldn’t even be drinking tonight anyway. I’m swamped with things I’ve yet to read.”

She scoffed, ordered another drink for you, and left to go to the dance floor with some unknown guy you’ve seen around campus. 

Leaning onto the bar, you stared at your drink, hoping it would finish itself. 

“It’s not going to finish itself.” Did you just hear your thoughts out loud? You looked up to search for the unfamiliar voice.

And there he was. Tall, slender, platinum hair that’s carefully pushed back further accentuating his jawline that’s sure to be able to cut through paper with how freaking sharp it was. His features were extremely strong. He had fierce eyes, tall nose bridge, and a smirk that carefully crossed his thinly-lined lips. 

He sat next to you without making eye contact and gestured to the bar tender indicating that he was probably a regular around here.

Realizing that you were seconds too late in replying, you shook your head and muttered, “I’m not rushing. I’m here with my friends.”

“I take it you didn’t want to come in the first place.”

“Is it that obvious?”

He let out a small laugh at your response and you could have sworn that it was the most handsome laugh you have ever heard in your life. 

“I’m Jay.” he offered his hand, which you shook, of course. You weren’t a fan of talking to strangers but he was just that inviting. No bias, but he was so gorgeous you just couldn’t ignore him! You wanted to be careful, but you’re not crazy.

“I’m Y/N. You from campus?”

“Yeah. I’m taking the 2-year MBA program,” he took a sip, “and you studying fashion or…?” 

“God no. I could never.” you nearly spat your drink hearing his assumption, but flattered nonetheless, “second year, JD.” 

“Yikes, there’s no wonder you looked like you didn’t want to be here.” 

You scoffed, “what’s that supposed to mean?”

“Well, of course, I didn’t first think you were in law. You look way too pretty to be someone who’s swarmed with school work.” 

“Is that your way of talking into picking girls up at bars?” 

He put his drink down to face you. This time, the smugness on his face disappeared and was replaced with a slight pink on his cheeks. He was flustered, and you made him lose his cool. Even you surprised yourself. You just didn’t know you had it in you to flirt tonight.

“Believe it or not, I don’t normally talk to girls around here.” 

It was your turn to laugh, “Is that so?” 

“Yeah. I’m not like other guys.”

“That is such an other guy thing to say!” 

The conversation went on for about an hour and you didn’t even notice how many drinks you were both having. The topics went on from school, to work, to friends, and to plans after school, and finally came to the part where he asked you out. You were hesitant at first (or at least you pretended to be hesitant), and thought that maybe this was just going to be a one time thing. He was kind and smart, but he did look like your typical college fuckboy after all. However, it’s been a while since you actually went out on a proper date and he seemed like there was more to him than just his appearance. 

“Sure.” you say, offering your last cheers for the night. 

—

“You said you were having a study group session, not a one-on-one with someone you obviously know has the hots for you.”

You can’t believe you were having this conversation just five months after meeting your boyfriend at the bar. Fighting was never a common thing between you two because you rarely even had the time to argue about anything. Jay was patient, loving, caring, and often just supported you and your decision to work and study. He offered to have you quit your job and just move in with him but you always thought that it was way too early into your relationship to accept the idea of living together. However, you did sleep over a lot considering he lived alone. 

Tonight you were scheduled to sleep over once again because it was just convenient. He lived much closer to campus and had a car. His program wasn’t as heavy as yours so he had the time to pick you up and send you to work and school. Everything was just peachy until this happened. 

Taking a deep breath you responded, “Jake is just a classmate, and we got partnered up to form a legal opinion together. It takes a lot of time Jay, and I didn’t know that the others would finish up much earlier than us. It’s no big deal, it was only a few hours.”

“I bet he purposely slowed things down to spend more time with you that’s all.” 

“What do you want from me? I can’t just avoid him just because he makes you feel uncomfortable.”

He scoffed, “Does he even know you have a boyfriend?” 

“Jay, I don’t need to tell him that I have a boyfriend. Everyone knows you’ve been picking me up to and from school.”

“Yeah, but it’s different when you actually tell them.” 

Finally arriving in his dorm, you put your bag down on the couch and stormed into the bathroom. He placed your laptop on the coffee table and tossed his car keys on the kitchen counter. You can sense his anger because you could hear him slamming the fridge shut from across the room. You just cannot believe him right now.

Ignoring his tantrum, you washed your face, brushed your teeth, and tied your hair up. 

“What do you want to eat?” he asked from the other side of the door.

“I’m not hungry.” You stepped out of the bathroom and went straight to your bag to bring out some of the books you were scheduled to read tonight. There was just so much to do and you can’t be wasting your time dealing with Jay right now. 

He on the other hand was just laying on the couch mindlessly scrolling through Netflix. The silent treatment from him would have been fine for you but the TV was being awfully loud you just can’t get yourself to study. 

“Are you doing this on purpose?” you finally spoke. 

“Doing what on purpose?”

“Jay, you’re being ridiculous right now.”

“I’m not doing anything.” 

You slammed your book shut, heavy enough to be intensely audible. He jumped a bit from the vibration as you gave him the most piercing look you have ever given him your entire relationship. He was being difficult the entire time on the way here despite knowing how much you seriously did not need it tonight. He knows that you had a lot to study for tomorrow and yet he was still being a brat about practically nothing.  

You packed up your books and rushed to the bedroom to change. “I’m leaving. I can’t study here.” 

“Fine.” He still never made eye contact. 

And with that, you left. 

—

Jay got up from the couch with what felt like forever. He knew you couldn’t have gone too far since your dorm was just a short bus ride away, but still, it was 7pm, dark, and cold outside. He didn’t mean to sound harsh, nor did he mean to piss you off. He typically did try his best to be the most understanding boyfriend for you knowing how much you cared about your studies. 

He unlocked his phone to see no new notifications. No messages from you whatsoever. 

Alright. If she needs time off from me to study, then fine. He thought. 

But what if you weren’t fine? What if you didn’t get to your dorm safely? What if the entire time you were walking home you entertained thoughts about breaking up with him? 

Jay shook his head to snap out of his own thoughts. He had been so emotional about you getting way too close to this classmate of yours. It wasn’t like him to act so jealous, but lately he has been noticing that you’ve been hanging out with that guy a little too much for his liking. He tossed and turned from the couch thinking about how he would make this up to you or how he would respond if you did try to reach out to him after tonight. He was losing his cool because of you again but this time it was a mixture of jealousy, worry, and frustration. 

He stood up feeling a slight blood rush from all the shuffling. Maybe he was just being paranoid, but he has never been so worked up for some girl before. His past relationships consisted of summer flings and college hookups that didn’t last more than a month. He never really believed in love just yet because he was so careful in saving it for someone he would actually want to devote all his time and heart to. However with you, it’s been more than three months, but is it too soon to categorize this as love? Was this what love was supposed to feel like? Was it always coupled with an impending fear of losing someone you barely spent an entire year with?

It was his turn to use the bathroom this time. He stepped onto what he expected to be a cold floor but to his surprise, the tiles never sent a sudden chill at all. He looked down to see a small carpet carefully placed on the bathroom floor. It was probably your doing because you always said that it was dangerous to keep the bathroom free of any rugs. The lack of friction might cause a slip and you wanted to rid yourselves away from any accidents. 

He sighed at the thought of you being so concerned about him. Looking around the bathroom, it was always clean these days ever since you semi-moved in with him. The towels were always newly replaced, the mirror was spotless, and the drug cabinet was always stocked up with medicines Jay never thought he ever needed. All of this he could have done all on his own but with you being on top of everything all the time despite your busyness, he just couldn’t shake the thought of wifing you up. He never thought he needed anyone until he found you. 

There was one thing that really tugged his heartstrings though. Your toothbrush was carefully placed in a cup near the sink just close to his.

“Do you even ever change your toothbrush?! You’re such a slob!” 

“I do too change my toothbrush every month!” 

“That’s fucking gross Jay, do it at least every three weeks.”

Jay watched you as you threw his old toothbrush away and opened a fresh new box with two toothbrushes this time. You placed the pink and blue ones in the cup near the sink and turned to him with the most satisfied smile. 

That was three months in your relationship. 

Feeling a rush of adrenaline, he grabbed his phone from the couch and started texting you asking where you are. He ran to the coat rack, grabbed a jacket, and exited his apartment within minutes. 

—

You were on case 12 out of 30 for your assigned cases to read tonight and thankfully you had the entire dorm to yourself because this was practically cramming since these cases were set for tomorrow’s recitation. Even if you’ve already been studying all day, it felt like you still had loads to cover before you were done with tonight. It wasn’t like you weren’t thinking of Jay the entire time but the fight wasn’t really worth pausing and you really couldn’t afford to lose momentum. 

Knock knock. The sound of the door interrupted your concentration. 

“Y/N, it’s me.” you heard him from the other side.

Well of course who else would it be?

“Jay I—“ you couldn’t even open the door fully and finish your sentence because he barged right in and surrounded you in the tightest embrace. He was panting, caressing your hair, digging his face in the crook of your neck. 

You can feel his heart thump against your body. He was so cold from the outside weather, but his breath was hot, and he was shaking. 

“Oh my god, is everything okay?!” you hugged him back, “are you hurt? did something happen?!”

“Why are you like this? I was picking a fight, left you alone to go home by yourself, was a total brat, and still you’re asking me if I’m okay??” he was exasperated, but continued to wrap his arms around you like his life depended on it. 

“Are you crazy? I’m not the one who’s barging into his girlfriend’s dorm acting like he didn’t see her just a few hours ago!”

He loosened his grip and faced you. You were probably just tired but was he crying?

“So you’re still my girlfriend?” he squeaked. He was so cute and so not himself right now if it weren’t such a worrisome atmosphere, you would have laughed. 

Okay, so maybe you did laugh a little bit. 

“Of course, I am!” you chuckled, “why did you ever think that I wasn’t?!” 

“Because we fought,” he sniffed, “I thought I was going to lose you.” 

You were full on laughing at him right now. His eyebrows furrowed and gave the cutest, tiniest pout. 

“Jay,” you finally managed to say, “I was mad, and yes we did fight. But I’m not breaking up with you. I’m sorry if you felt that I was going to.” 

He hugged you again, but this time tackling you onto the couch putting his entire weight on top of your smaller frame. 

“Jay—“ you choked, “’Jay, if you don’t get off of me right now I might actually break up with you.”

“That’s not funny!” he backed away in an instant, “You can’t just sprinkle all this domesticity onto my life and just walk away.” He continued to rub his eyes, sniffling, and struggling to sit next to you on the couch. You caressed his back and waited for him to calm the eff down. 

“I’m not sure what your idea of romance is babe, but that’s how relationships are supposed to be,” you comforted him as he turned to face you, “we will fight, butt heads, disagree, get jealous, and even walk out on each other but that doesn’t mean we love each other any less.”

He sat up straight hearing the word and you notice his ears turn cherry red. 

“—and yes, I do love you, Jay.” 

“You love me?” he sounded like the word was so foreign, so uncommon, and so alien that the slight hesitation made you feel like you trespassed in some unfamiliar territory. 

With that, you just nodded. 

He buried his face into his hands. Is he going to say it? Is this finally the day he’s going to say it? He pictured that the first time he would ever say it to anyone would be special. He imagined it being on a hill, or by the ocean, or on top of the city lights, or somewhere more beautiful and deserving than this. But come to think of it, he never would have thought about saying it before, not to just anyone at least. 

He only really imagined saying it to you. 

There were nights where you two would just be eating, watching TV, brushing your teeth, he would watch you get up to study right after you just had sex, just doing the most mundane things, and he would just have this strong urge to tell you something. Something he has never ever felt with anyone else before. 

He tensed up, took a deep breath, and said:

“I love you.” 

He looked at you so intensely.

“I love you, so much.”

And you knew. He didn’t need to say it, but you knew. 

[klausinamarink]

Oop let's try this again; for the birthday fics: “Because you’re a jinx!” angsty Steddie established relationship, chasing fame Eddie and some guy Steve who gets discovered while Eddie's band keeps being passed over? Platonic hellcheer and platonic Stobin.

I couldn’t find a way to put in the platonic ships but it’s still Steddie. Enjoy the angsty flavour electric boogaloo.

It was supposed to be Eddie’s lucky day.

This was supposed to be his time. The moment when the rich suits would look at Eddie and immediately offer him the contract that finally pushed his music to fame.

But it was just another fucking mediocre performance. Only a few people out of the dozens in the crowd cheered, but that was worse than getting no response at all. Nobody even went up to them for an autograph, their numbers, Instagram handles, music samples, anything that would’ve made the night worth it.

Eddie stayed silent and seething for the whole drive home. The rest of the band left on their own respective vehicles, though Jeff had lingered longer to say something that Eddie mentally filtered out. Probably some shitty encouragement or a call to quit. 

His hands tightened around the wheel. Eddie felt the pulsing headache crawl to the back of his eyes. Goddamnit, he needed to sleep.

Maybe in Steve’s arms, but for once, Eddie just wanted to be alone for tonight. 

After he parked the car and trudged the stairs back to his apartment, Eddie bit his lip until he tasted the sting of copper. 

He was so tired. Not just physically, but in very foul shape that took its claws into him. It was the apathetic crowds and uninterested advisors. How the rest of the band delayed practice more and more. The bland methodical act of cutting up another piece of his shrinking soul as a muse for his lyrics. 

But still. He was close to that single star of recognition. Eddie had to taste it.

Unlocking the door, Eddie kept himself from collapsing until he dropped his guitar case and landed face-first on the couch. 

In the bedroom, he could catch some muffled conversation, the floor creaking as Steve paced back and forth inside. 

Eddie frowned and checked his phone for any missed messages. Steve hadn’t texted him since five,  soon after Eddie had left for the worst night of his life. It was almost eleven now. So why was his boyfriend still up and talking to someone?

Before Eddie could try and get up, the door opened and Steve came out, his phone in hand. Steve glanced up and stopped in his tracks when he saw Eddie. He gave a bright smile.

“Hey, babe! You okay?” 

Eddie groaned. If he had the energy, he could scream into the pillows.

The floor creaked as Steve approached and gently laid a hand on his back. “Was the band okay?”

Eddie groaned again, unable to hold himself back from pressing against Steve’s hand. He could really use a fucking massage. Or some quick, stress-relief sex. “It’s fucking awful. It’s always fucking awful.”

Steve made a sympathetic noise, “I’m sorry to hear that, Eds.”

Eddie lifted his head up and peered at Steve. Despite his words, there was an odd light in Steve’s eyes and his lips were fighting desperately not to smile.

“What is it?” He asked.

Steve had the nerve to look spooked, “Uh, well, I don’t want to ruin your mood-”

“What is it?”

Steve stared at him for a moment before he sighed like it was the start of a serious discussion.

“You know that audition I did back in Chicago two weeks ago?” Steve bit his lip. It only revealed the cracks of excitement on his face and Eddie already knew what he was about to say. “Well, my agent called and said that I’m officially casted. I’m gonna be in a HBO show!”

Record scratch.

Eddie only stared at Steve as the news hit him with the speed of a truck. When he saw Steve’s smile in full glory, he only saw blank faces who spat at him with rejection and disappointment and ‘try better’s. 

How the fuck does Steve get so many gigs when Eddie could barely find an open venue in advance? And now he’s going to work for fucking HBO, Jesus Christ-

Steve was frowning at him, “You- are you not happy?”

“Of course, I am!” Eddie said quickly. It felt hard to speak when there was something now stuck and burning in his throat. He got up from the couch and walked to the kitchen. He needed a drink. Maybe not alcohol, though tempting. But some actual water but he was too exhausted and sober for this shit. 

“I’m always here to support my wonderful and talented boyfriend who never misses an audition. Who always gets a spot in whatever he plays in, even if it’s a fucking diaper commercial or a glorified extra who gets five more cents than his less impressive boyfriend.” 

As he spoke, his words became more tinted with venom. Eddie took an empty glass and filled it under the tap. He almost choked from gulping it down in one go. It cooled his throat, but the burning simply expanded through his veins.

“Okay, you’re mad.” Steve said slowly, now behind him.

Eddie laughed bitterly, “Yeah, no shit, Sherlock. They taught you that in acting class or was it a trick from your last ex?”

“Jesus, okay, Eddie.” Steve put his hands on Eddie’s shoulders but Eddie shook him off with more force than necessary. “You’re obviously in a bad mood and my news isn’t making it better, but you did ask and-”

Eddie whirled around. He was seeing red at the corners of his vision. “And now it’s my fault?!”

Steve backed away, his hands up in a plea of surrender. His face pinched with concern and hurt. “Eddie, let’s, let’s just go to bed. Take a shower-”

“Stop treating me like I’m a child!” 

“Fuck, even a child would tell me what’s making them this upset!”

“You wanna know why I’m so upset? Huh?” Eddie smacked a hand against Steve’s chest, pushing his boyfriend away. “Take a guess with your ‘subtlety’ talents and maybe you can fucking figure it out.”

“No, I- Eds, baby-” Steve stopped to take a breath. He looked back at Eddie with more firmness, but he saw the way Steve’s ego was crumbling in his eyes. “Can you please just tell me why are you acting like this? Was it because I did something or-?”

Eddie’s anger flared. It touched the back of his mouth so he spat it all out like a dragon. “Oh, everything you do with your squeaky clean and easy career is the reason why I’m pissed at you. You get all of these stupid roles to play some stupid character Twitter would make discourse for while I have spent the last three years trying to find someone who’s willing to listen to my band play in a goddamn studio! But I keep missing these opportunities for some reason that I’m starting to think that we’re cursed or shit.”

“Eds, it can’t-”

“And don’t you say you know how it feels like because you never knew how to fucking fail, Stevie! Everything you do is just rich executives giving you silver platters. I bet they all want that Harrington blowjob.”

Steve gasped softly and shook his head. He now had his arms around himself like it would protect him. “That’s not true- Why are you even saying these things to me?!”

“Because you’re a jinx! Because you’re Steve Harrington and I hate your dumb luck!”

Eddie’s words echoed across the apartment as he breathed heavily. He wouldn’t be surprised if it went out the windows and into the streets. 

Steve held an unbelievably idiotic expression. Mouth half-open, a slack jaw, glossy eyes that just stared at Eddie without any more light shining in them.

Finally, he spoke so quietly that Eddie had to strain to hear, “Okay… I’m going to Robin’s.”

With that, Steve hurried out, having some decency to not slam the door.

And then it was just Eddie, alone in the kitchen with the nasty thoughts and words that would soon bite back at him.

[seenoversundown]

For Death Or Glory : Chapter Twenty-Four

Jake Kiszka x Charlotte (Fem OC)

Warnings: Wholesome Vibes, Fluff, Happy Tears, Mild Anxious Themes, LINDA AND ELEANOR ARE BACK (our queens), Tension, Mentions of Snow, Parental advice, some pirate/ocean references, and a LOT of hugs. (I think the hugs will really be beneficial for all of us)

Word Count: 5.5k

Summary: It's the bar's anniversary night and there's a slight chill in the air.

Author's Note: Did I cry over this chapter? Possibly ❤️. But for very different reason than last weeks. I really am in disbelief that next week is.. it. Let's all just savor this chapter together and celebrate with our sweet little pirate man 🥂 (I'm ready to scream about it with you guys 🥹)

Caravel - Greta Van Fleet "Sail to the end of the world, For death or glory."

⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯

The Anniversary Party  - 7:15 p.m. 

Pull it together, I think to myself, wiping the tears that were trying to make their escape. I decided that spending the drive in my thoughts sounded better than trying to drown them out with music, which is how I spent most of my day fighting the urge to cry and losing. 

If I thought the idea of just having to tell him that I had to go back home was terrible, watching him cry is probably in the top three worst moments of my life. Seeing the way his eyes looked when I told him that his comment was wrong, I could feel that he regretted it. I can’t even be mad at him when I know he didn’t mean it. Listening to him sob and cry to me that he was sorry broke my heart; I just couldn’t bring myself to say anything at the moment.

Once I got home, even though I was emotionally exhausted, I couldn’t sleep. I could just hear him in my head on a loop, practically begging me to stay. I can’t believe I left. I knew I wouldn’t say anything about my work situation if I stayed, so I didn’t. And now, I regret it. I should have stayed and told him everything. 

I spent a lot of the night just wishing I hadn’t given him attitude because it wasn’t fair to him. I had been working most of the day and finally had someone call me back that I’d been waiting on, but they were upset with the message I had for them. So, I was on the receiving end of one of the angry bar owners, unlike Jacob, when I walked into the bar, and I still didn’t know what made me take that out on him. 

I would take it back in a second if I could. 

Now I’m sitting in my car, parked in my usual spot down the street from the bar, debating heavily on what I should do. I never actually packed anything because I would start crying every time I tried. It’s not even been a full day since we saw each other, and I’m terrified to walk in there. 

I don’t want to have that conversation tonight; I can’t ruin the anniversary party more than I possibly already have. Maybe depending on how he acts, I’ll mention something after Thanksgiving. Then it came back to me; I told him I would text him all day tomorrow… oh god– what have I done? 

I look up at the sky; the moon is faint in the distance, but she’s there. 

“Cass, I did this for you,” I whisper. “I wish you could tell me if it was going to work out or if I royally messed up.” Closing my eyes and taking a deep breath, I shut off my car. When I step out, a breeze washes over me, the type of cold where you know snow is coming. Making sure I have all his paperwork and my bag, I start my walk over to the bar. 

I really could just go home. 

I know the address.. I could just mail this.

I don’t think I can do it. 

I don’t know what possessed me to look back up, but I did, and the cloud that had been blocking the moon moved. The light from it felt different this time, and a smirk laced my lips as I looked at it. 

I’m taking that as my sign, Cass. I hear you.

As I get closer, I see the number of cars parked along the street and vaguely see through the bar windows. There’s a lot of people here for it being a Wednesday. Good job, Jacob.  

7:36 p.m. 

The door chime goes off, but enough people are talking, and the music is still loud, so there’s no chance anybody heard it. I scan the bar, looking for him, just hand him the paperwork and then leave. You can try to talk to him over the weekend and maybe work something out or at least make sure he doesn’t hate you. I try to pep talk myself. 

Not seeing him anywhere, I start to wander around, kind of hoping not to run into anybody, which is a bold choice right now. I bump into someone while trying to find him, and she turns around quickly. 

“Oh! I’m sorry, honey, didn’t see you there!” Her voice is loud but sweet. “You look lost– what do you need?” She gently holds my arm as she asks. 

“Uh- I need to find Jake. I don’t see him, though,” I tell her. Why do I feel like I should know who she is?

Her eyes widen at the sound of his name, but her expression softens when she tells me, “He’s in there somewhere! I thought I saw him run outback a minute ago.” 

“Oh, okay. Thank you. I’ll just hang out for a few then,” I shoot her a small smile. 

She smiles back at me; her smile feels familiar. She quietly says, “If I run into him, I can let him know you’re here. What’s your name?” 

I hesitate for a second, “Oh, um, Charlotte.” 

“Pretty,” she lets out. “I’ll try to grab him for ya.” 

Not even a minute passes, and I see him come down the hallway, but he definitely can’t see me. He looks so good, too. I linger behind people to avoid making eye contact as my heart rate starts to pick up. You can do it. I watch him from a distance; he’s behind the bar, handing someone a drink. That smile, but his eyes look tired. The way he moves captivates me; it feels like I’m seeing him for the first time all over again.  

He’s just pouring a beer for someone, but even something so mundane makes the butterflies erupt in my stomach. When he slides it over to the customer, his shirt falls open more and shows off his chest, and his necklace dangles, making my body warm because I’ve felt that necklace graze my skin before. Good god, why does he just look like this? 

All I can see in my mind is how gorgeous he is, especially when we were holed up together. He would put together his cute little outfits when we did things. The way he would walk around in his short and tight little boxers, leaving no room for imagination, was fine with me. 

His smile was still my favorite, whether it was just the little grin as he held back some pirate phrase, knowing I’d laugh at how dumb he was. Or when he fully smiles.. that boy is so beautiful. I could probably write a dissertation on how much I love that smile. I love a lot of things about him. His smile, the way he’s always touching me somehow, that silly English accent..maybe I-

Suddenly, I hear a clinking sound that multiplied rapidly, pulling me from my thoughts. Glancing around, I see everyone sitting in the booth they always choose when they’re all together. They all are holding their glasses up, tapping whatever they can against them to get everyone’s attention. 

Josh holds his glass up behind the bar, pulling Jake into his side. Jake’s face is completely red as he looks down, with a slight smile on his face. 

“I feel like everyone here should already know, but my brother is the owner of this fine establishment,” Josh starts, “And I just want to say how proud I am of him for taking the chance and managing to stay open for the past year,” He leans over, kissing the side of Jake’s head, and I see him mumble something to him while everyone claps for him. 

“Now, I know you really want to hear from the man of the hour, so,” Josh lets out,  and I watch Jake shake his head a few times, but everyone gets real quiet. We all collectively just stared at him, waiting to see what he would say, and all I could think was, ‘I’ll even hold your hand if you get nervous,’ when he actually starts to speak. 

“Um, I wasn’t really prepared to say anything, but,” he starts. “I never thought this would actually happen, um.. especially to me.” I watch as he fidgets with the ring he has on. You can do this, Jake.

 “I don’t know that I could have done it without my family basically throwing me overboard into the idea. It was a for death or glory moment for me, and—“ he pauses, looking up at everyone just admiring him. “I’m truly just so happy to be here now.” 

His eyes scan the room, and my heart drops when he meets my stare; blinking slowly, it feels like time has stopped, and all I can do is smile at him. I watch a slight smirk grow on his face when he says, “I couldn’t have done it without you. I’m endlessly grateful for everyone keeping me afloat. It’s only been a year, so—“ he grabs the glass next to him, holding it up, “Too many more.” 

The way everyone cheered and started clinking glasses had my eyes welled up. His brothers, Danny included, pulled him into hugs, which only naturally meant the girls and Quinn were next. I just watch him as he beams at everyone who walks up to him and gets all the praise he deserves. But his eyes kept wandering back to me. 

I’m so proud of you, baby. 

8:03 p.m.

Those green eyes– are all I can think about as I stand there. 

My heart about stopped when I saw her. I never would have expected her to show up after last night. But the second we locked eyes again, I felt less nervous. Maybe it was just the simple fact she showed up or the way I could see her trying to hide a tear as she smiled back at me. 

Finishing my weird toast while looking at her was the closest I was going to get to her holding my hand tonight, and that’s okay. Immediately, Josh pulled me into a hug after rocking me back and forth. 

“She’s here,” he whispers into my ear, almost like he’s trying to protect me.  

I turn my face to whisper back, “I know.” 

He leans back from the hug, looking at me, “You can do this,” he says, squeezing my shoulders a few times. “I’m so proud of you.” 

“Thank you,” is all I can manage to say back to him. 

Once I walk out from behind the bar, I’m practically mauled by the rest of them. I don’t think I’ve hugged so many people back-to-back like that before. Listening to a slew of ‘Proud of you! and ‘Happy anniversary! as they take their turn pulling me into them. 

Getting to Quinn, who quietly asks, “Are you going to talk to her?” 

“I mean,” I whisper back, “I’ll see what she says first.. I’m not going to push too hard today.” 

They nod, leaning back from the hug, “You’ll get her, I promise.” Offering me a smile, which I quickly return. 

“Love you,” I whisper, pulling them back into the hug for a second. 

They just mumble back, “Love you too.” Giving me an extra tight squeeze before letting go. 

I started to walk towards her, but my dad stepped in front of me first. He holds out his arms, inviting me for a hug, like everyone else has so far. 

“Proud of you, kid,” he mumbles next to my ear. 

I rest my head against him for a second before moving back, looking at him, and quietly letting out, “Thank you.”  

“I think someone is waiting to talk to you,” his voice is low, nodding towards Charlotte. His hand grabs my shoulder, squeezing a few times, and then quietly says, “Go get her.” 

When I go to walk over to her, I finally see her, and even though I’ve seen her in all forms the last couple of weeks, she always leaves me breathless. I could stare at her for the rest of my life and still not understand how she can be so effortlessly beautiful. 

“Hey, you,” I say as I get closer to her. “I didn’t know if you’d still be here tonight.” 

“Well, I do have these for you,” Her voice is soft. She holds out a folder filled with paperwork. “Everything is good to go, and Melody is certified.” 

“Thank you,” I say quietly. 

She meets my stare and quietly lets out, “Of course.” A soft smile laces her lips as we look at each other, which only makes the corners of mine twitch. I stepped a little closer to her, but she didn’t back up. 

“Um, I know it’s already kinda late,” I start, knowing I sound nervous but still asking, “Are you staying for a bit, or do you need to go?” 

She uncomfortably says, “I should probably head out.. I have a lot of driving ahead of me.” 

“No, that makes sense,”  I say, looking around for somewhere to set the folder down. “I’ll um..” Turning around, I see my dad, waving him over subtly. 

I tell him quietly, “Hey, I’m gonna walk her to her car. Can you hold this?” He just nods at me, glancing over to Char. 

“Oh, you don’t have to do that,” she rambles out, her hand landing on my arm, and my heart drops at the contact. Instinctually,  I cover her hand with mine when I turn back to her. 

“I’ve walked you to your car for three weeks; you really think I’m gonna stop now?” I tell her, which makes her laugh. 

“You know what,” she giggles quietly. “You’re right.” I set my drink on a random table, knowing it’ll be lost in the sea of glasses now, but who cares?

Pushing open the door and gesturing for her to go out first, “After you.” 

The walk to her car is quiet, neither of us really knowing what to say until she finally breaks it, “She looks nice tonight.” 

Looking over at her as she looks at the moon, making me smile despite the heartache, “She does.” 

“Your little toast was nice, by the way,” she says quietly, glancing over at me.  

Looking down at the sidewalk for a second, “I wasn’t ready for that, and as you can imagine, I'm not much of a public speaker.” She laughs at me; my heart starts to race. 

“Well,” she starts, as we make it to her car, “I thought you did a great job.” 

I slowly blink at her, “Thank you.” 

We stare at each other silently for a moment. I would give anything to just pretend that nothing happened and that everything is still how it was yesterday morning.  

“I won’t keep you, it’s freezing.” I lean forward, pulling her door open for her like I always do. She looks at me for a second and then steps closer, wrapping her arms around me. I’ve never let go of her car door faster as I pull her in tight; please don’t let this be the last time. My hand runs down the back of her head, just cherishing the hug while it lasts. Breathing her in slowly, trying to engrave the scent of her perfume into my brain. Turning my face and letting my lips rest against the side of her head, unable to resist the urge just to press one small kiss into her hair. One more. 

Once she starts to let go, I loosen my grip, letting her decide when she’s done. My hands run down the back of her arms as she pulls back until her hands land in mine. We just stare at each other for a second when she squeezes so slightly, and I return the gesture before letting go. I open her door again,  and she sits in her driver's seat, looking back up at me.

“Drive safe, Red.” 

She stares at me for a second and then quietly lets out, ”Will do, Captain.”

I swallow hard at the pet name she chose, but I can’t stop the smile from creeping in. Shutting her door gently, I can’t decide if that made me feel better or worse. 

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8:40p.m

 My mom met me at the door, “So, that was her, right?” 

“Mhm,” I quickly respond, not sure of how far she’s going with this. I don’t know how much I can even talk about right now. 

“She’s beautiful,” she tells me, a little inquisitive inflection laced in it. 

I nod quietly, “She’s incredible.”  

“You really love her, don’t you?”

“I feel insane, but I swear I’d do anything to keep her.” 

“Oh, sweetheart,” she says, grabbing my shoulders. “She’ll come back. I saw how she looked at you.” She runs her hand down the back of my head before tucking my hair behind my ear as she looks at me. “Her eyes lit up the moment she saw you. There was no denying it.”

I glance over to the door and then back down, “I just hope you’re right.” 

“Hey,” she practically scolds me, “If she loves you, she’ll come home, alright?” She gently taps my chest a few times. “And if I know anything about you, there’s no reason she wouldn’t come back to you.” Her hand held the side of my face. She brushed her thumbs over my cheekbones a few times, forcing me to look at her. She just quietly coos, “Oh, my sweet little boy.” 

My throat hurts as I choke back the emotions threatening to come up. I’m gonna cry if she keeps talking. My arms instinctually pull her in for a hug, tucking my face into her shoulder and letting out a deep breath. She rubs my back for a second before I finally mumble out, “I love you, mum.” 

“I love you too,” she tells me, pulling back from the hug enough to look at me. “Now, go enjoy your night, babe. You earned it.”

I just smile at her for a second and then mumble, “Thank you.” 

She pulls my face in, kissing my cheek a few times, and then looks at me with watery eyes, whispering, “I’m so proud of you.” 

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Once I went back to talking to everyone, I started to relax a bit. Taking my mind off the inevitable questions that would come up tomorrow. It was nice to have time just to see all the regulars who had been coming in since we opened. 

I find myself sitting with two of my favorite people for a while, Linda and Eleanor. Listening to them tell me about what their Thanksgiving plans are– which is honestly very sweet. 

“Well, we are both single old broads, so I told Miss Ellie just to come join me, and we could watch the parade together and make some food,” Linda tells me. “Figured it’s better than us sitting at home alone!” 

Eleanor giggled before letting out a quiet, “Absolutely is.” 

“I’m glad you two will be spending the day together,” I tell them. “Are you seeing family at all?”

They go on to tell me about how they either just spend Christmas with their families or sometimes people will come to them, but it just depends on the year and how they’re feeling. 

“What are you boys doing for the holiday?” Eleanor asks. 

I sighed, “Well, my parents are up, obviously. So, we’ll all pile into their Airbnb tomorrow morning, and my mom will spend the whole day making food and forcing us to eat until we’re about to throw up.” Laughing a little at the thought because it’s the truth. 

“I’m sure it’s a wonderful time,” Eleanor says. “Your family seems fun to be around.”

I glance around after she makes the comment. Seeing my brothers laughing together in their typical booth. Sam’s arm draped around Willa, keeping her close like he’s worried she’ll try to escape. I love that he’s found someone like her, even if it is weird to see him so protective over someone. 

Moving my eyes over to Danny, shaking his head at whatever nonsense Sam must have spewed. Mel tucked into him like she always has, but fully engulfed in conversation with Quinn. Oh, Quinn.   

The wonderful person who has my best friend and twin brother wrapped around their finger. I knew that when Josh found someone, they would fit him perfectly because he is such a special person, and there was no way that he could just find an ordinary human to be his partner. After spending as much time as I have with Quinn, I couldn’t imagine someone better. 

The way that Mel and Josh take turns lingering near the table so they can all hang out throughout the night because not only are they all best friends, but we’re all practically family at this point. 

I look back to Eleanor with a soft smile, “They really are.” 

I spent a little longer hanging out with them before deciding to take over the bar for a while. Both of them hugged and congratulated me on the anniversary before I walked off to relieve the other two. 

Sometimes, it was nice to be behind the bar alone, just talking with whoever was sitting up there and making drinks. It made the time pass quickly, and I didn’t have time to think about much else, especially on nights like tonight when the bar was full. The only thing missing was her. 

Having her sit at the end of the bar for the last few weeks for hours, just giving me shit about my job or making little comments that would drive me mad until I could finally close the bar and whisk her away to my bedroom. Spending our nights teasing each other while I served people and trained Melody, I always felt like it was torture because I just wanted to clock out so badly. Now, it feels odd that she isn’t here. 

How she looked at me while we stood there, her lightly squeezing my hands like I’ve done to her so many times in the last couple of weeks. Just to let her know I was there. I feel like it should make me feel more confident about her, but I’m afraid to get my hopes too high, even if it’s probably too late for that.  

When Josh and Mel make their way back to the bar, I let  Josh know that I’m going to step out for a minute. I quietly slide into my office, grabbing my lighter and cigarettes from my desk drawer and hiding them in my pocket before wandering out the back door. 

⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯

10:00 p.m.

It smells like snow. The air is a different type of cold; you can smell winter around the corner. I lit my cigarette, took that first drag, and pulled my phone out. 

She should be home by now, looking at the time and then hesitating to say something to her. I stare out at the docks, watching the boats gently rock. Remembering the moment that she leaned in first, how relieved I was that it wasn’t just me wanting that. Her smile when I went back in for another kiss as if she thought I wouldn’t want that. My heart aches at the thought. I should just .. send her something.

We spent almost a month in this weird situation, and it feels wrong to go radio silent. Maybe Mom is right. 

I start typing away, deleting the message, and starting over probably twenty times, not knowing what to say but just wanting to say anything to keep her in my life potentially. Even if she’s not mine. 

I finally hit send when it doesn’t feel too insane, but my body flinches when I feel someone’s hand on my shoulder. 

“I had a feeling I’d find you out here,” my dad quietly tells me. “You okay?”

I nod, “Mhm, I just needed a break from the noise.” 

“Between your mother and both of your brothers, can’t say I blame you,” he laughs. “I know that isn’t the entire reason, and you don’t have to say it.” 

I let out a deep sigh before inhaling more smoke into my lungs to try and stop the sad from coming back. 

“I just texted her. Hoping that she at least will keep talking to me if anything.” I tell him, feeling a bit pathetic. 

He stares at me for a second, “She really got you good, huh?”

“She’s perfect, dad. How was I supposed to not fall for her?” I almost laugh at it, taking one last drag from the cigarette that is threatening to burn me at this point. Squishing the lit end into the railing before turning to walk back to the bar. “Did I make a bad choice doing that or..?” 

“Your mom is much better in these situations, but,” he starts as we slowly walk back. “I think you saw a beautiful girl and took your chance. I’m positive if I were in the same situation with your mom back then, I would have done the same thing.” 

“I knew I was fucked from the day I met her, y’know?” I say. “I couldn’t stop thinking about her after that.” I just watch the ground as we walk, getting closer to the bar. 

His arm wraps around my shoulders, pulling me into his side as I’m about to pull open the back door for the bar. 

“She’ll come back, bud,” he says. “I saw how she looked at you.. I know that look.”  I lean my head against him for a second before he pulls my shoulders away from him and turns me towards him.

 “Please make sure you wash your hands and drink something, and I won’t tell your mother that you still smoke. I’ll never hear the end of it.” We both laugh at the fact she would absolutely make it his problem.  

“Will do,” I laugh out. “Um.. thank you.” I stare at him, fighting the emotions that want to come out, which, after the last twenty-four hours, is getting more difficult. 

He breathes out a typical dad sigh, a slight smile on his face, before he wraps me up in another hug, “Of course. Just wanna see you happy, kid.”

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The bar is closing early tonight because of the holiday, and truthfully, I’m a bit relieved that I don’t have to sit here until two in the morning.  Mostly, everyone had left, and there were just a few stragglers to take care of during the last hour of the night. Just trying to focus on the fact I’ll get to hang out with my family tomorrow and how nice it’ll be to just spend time with them. Even if I want nothing more than to bring her with me. 

11:00 p.m.

Once everything is basically cleaned up, I sneak out front. Something about being outside helped clear my head, even if it was brief. 

How she looked at me before she left makes my heart skip a beat when I think about it. Maybe she isn’t completely done here. It took all my strength not to kiss her again, but I didn’t want to overstep after last night.

If I can at least keep talking to her, maybe we can make things happen because there’s no chance she wasn’t at least kind of interested. Recounting all the times, she would just look at me from a distance, which I’m sure she didn’t think I would notice. But her stare is a hard one to ignore. 

My mind drifts off to all the moments that I should have realized I was falling in love with her. I don’t know who I was kidding thinking I could survive just being friends with benefits.  

Hearing her cry on the other end of the phone the day after I held her in my office, I never walked out of the bar so fast. She sounded so panicked that I would have gone to her if I had known where she was. But the moment I got her to laugh, my heart felt different. 

Walking into my room and seeing her standing there defeated and drunk, fighting with the zipper on her pants, I know I laughed at her, but she was so cute. And then her in my sweatshirt with her bare legs staring back at me once I got the zipper apart for her. Leaving a kiss on my cheek before I left the room, my heart raced for so long after that. 

The night after we kissed, walking her to her car, she was absolutely terrified that she wouldn’t seem into it. Then she looked at me, leaning against my chest, and let out a quiet, “Jacob.” I knew I needed to kiss her again at that moment. The way she grabbed at my shirt when I did tells me that she was craving it, too. 

When she thought I was fully asleep on the couch, she slipped up and called me ‘baby.’ She just wanted to make sure I was comfortable, but if she only knew that having her curled up to me was enough. Feeling her tuck herself back into me, playing with my necklace as I drifted back to sleep, I could have stayed there forever. 

The entire day we spent in Salem. The fact she wanted me to be present with her, calling me ‘babe’ in public, how she kept holding my hand all day. She was always so shy when I would pay for things, but I wanted nothing more than for her to have a good day and try to make up for the fact that her tradition was disrupted. 

Nothing could have prepared me for the way she looked at me when we took pictures. Seeing it after, it’s written all over my face, even if I didn’t realize it in the moment. 

I’ll never know what possessed me to sing to her in that bar, but the smile on her face was worth it. Swaying around with her, her little giggles as I spun her away from me but quickly pulled her back in. All that I could see in my head was me twirling her around in a white dress someday. And god, she looked beautiful. 

The door creaks as it opens, bringing me back to earth. 

“Enjoying the cold?” Josh asks, walking over. 

I breathe out, “I guess.”

“Well, I’m going to head up,” He says, grabbing my shoulder. “It’s going to be a long day tomorrow.” 

“Yeah— I don’t know how ready I am,” I let out before telling him, “You can leave it unlocked. I’ll be up in a few.”

He pulls me into a hug, “Love you, don’t stay out here too long; it’s already getting late.” 

“Love you too.” 

He looks back at me before slipping inside, with a slight grin on his face, and says, “Just let me know if she shows back up.” 

I smile, giving him a slow nod, “Will do.” 

Something about the air tonight and the pep talks from both of my parents convinced me to stay out here for a little bit longer before going upstairs. Doing the mental gymnastics to make sure I don’t get my hopes too high. I slide my phone from my pocket, seeing that it’s only 11:35 p.m. I go to open my texts and it’s still on hers. 

Read at 11:02 p.m. 

Maybe she just got to her parents and that’s why she didn’t reply yet. 

I stare at my lock screen, a photo I snuck of her in Salem. She was so beautiful and happy. It’s mostly the back of her head as we were walking down the street, but she had glanced over as I took it so you can vaguely see her side profile. I don’t think she’s noticed that I did it, but if anything happens this weekend, I’ll change it. But for now, I’ll just keep her there. 

The streets are dimly lit and quiet now that everyone has gone home; I watch as a few snowflakes start to fall. I suck in a deep breath, letting it slowly leave my body, trying to release some of the anxiety, but the only thing I can do is look up at the moon and think, please come home, Charlotte. 

Sliding my phone back into my pocket, I stare down at my shoes for a moment, and then I hear footsteps. I let out a little breath before I looked over, biting the inside of my lip. 

“Hi.”

“Hey, you.” 

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Chapter Twenty-Three

Chapter Twenty-Five

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[chvoswxtch]

I’m so excited to be joining the court eras tour! Congrats on the achievement! Can I request speak now about Frank and Matty competing for the attention of the same girl? Wether it means she ends with one of them, none, or both *wink wink*

you know, my philosophy in life is why have one when you can have both?

side note: i'm the worst person to go shopping with bc if you ask me if you should get something, i'm gonna tell you to treat yourself and if you ask me to help you decide between two things, i'm gonna tell you to get them both

with that being said, let's fuck date them both <3

electric touch (frank's version ft. matt)

firstly, frank and matt are very different when it comes to dating

matt flirts with anything that has a heartbeat. he's a charming, smooth talking fucker, and he knows exactly what he's doing. he doesn't even need to use his heightened senses to be able to tell that his dazzling grin and dimples coupled with his alluring deep voice makes a person's blood rush to their cheeks and to other places in their body

frank on the other hand is a little more shy. if you remember, maria approached him first when they met, and that actually seems to be a recurring theme for frank (karen makes the first move, sarah is the one that kisses him, beth is the one that invites him home). essentially, frank is a consent king who lets his partner come to him. not that he doesn't flirt, I think he does when he feels more comfortable, but it doesn't come second nature to him like it does to matt

secondly, I think their different personalities also shine in terms of the kind of date they take you on

matt's go to date idea that we've seen tends to be a romantic dinner somewhere. despite him being a huge slut flirt, i do think he's a hopeless romantic at heart. matt could ask you to dinner as easily as he could ask you what time it was, but I think he'd do his best to make sure to pick a spot that he knew you would like based off your preference in food, meet you at the restaurant looking devastatingly handsome, and then take you on a nice little stroll to keep the evening going

frank on the other hand seems a little more old school and traditional. despite where he's taking you, he's definitely picking you up at your door and bringing flowers. I could see him being a dinner and movie guy, but I also think frank would wanna get to really know you, and it's kinda hard to have a conversation with someone while watching a movie. so I personally think he would take you to do something fun (we know he loved to take his family to the park with the carousel), something like bowling, mini golf, an arcade (where he'd totally show off and win you a prize), an aquarium, etc. somewhere where the two of you could do something fun together and then get a bite after

NOW, we know frank and matt are super competitive with one another, but if they were trying to win over the same person? absolute chaos

let's just say for fun y'all all go on a first date at the same time (bc I personally think it would be hilarious)

you let frank pick the activity y'all do together, and he purposefully sends matt on a wild goose chase telling him to meet at the mini golf place at 7pm, but, he doesn't specify which one. so a pissed off matt finally tracks you and frank down around 7:30 (by the scent of frank's cologne that he would know anywhere) and frank fires the first shot

"'bout time you showed up, red. don't you know it ain't polite to make a lady wait?"

"well I would have been on time if you had specified where this place was. do you know how many mini golf places there are in this city?"

"my bad, thought you'd be pickin' her up at her door with flowers too. guess that was just me though."

frank has the biggest grin on his face, meanwhile matt's cheeks are burning red, both from annoyance and from sprinting to catch up

but frank's victory is short lived when matt beckons you over with a charming smirk and an innocent request for help

"sweetheart, you mind helping me hit the ball? I don't exactly know where i'm aiming."

much to frank's dismay, he has to watch you press yourself up against matt's back, holding onto his hands that were around the golf club, and giggle instructions into his ear as you help him on where to aim

"aw now that's horseshit. you don't need her goddamn help, and you know it."

"i am blind, frank."

matt wears a cocky smirk with every ball you help him hit, but the more you start cheering for frank with how many perfect shots he's hitting (if there's one thing frank is good at it's aim), matt starts showing out too, and eventually the two men forget you're even playing with them bc they're competing against each other so hard

before they break out into a brawl in the sand pit, the three of you make your way to dinner, each of them insisting on holding one of your hands (which they refuse to let go of) so everyone walking in your direction has to go completely around the three of you

matt chose an incredibly romantic italian spot, and needless to say, the host was very confused seeing the three of you together (especially with the disgruntled looks on both of their faces bc they wanted you all to themselves)

not even five minutes pass before they're back at each other's throats

it starts with matt recommending a red wine to you and pronouncing the name of it wrong, to which frank sassily corrects him, and matt scowls across the table behind his red glasses

"what, you suddenly speak italian, castle?"

"i am italian, you dipshit."

matt, completely stunned by this new information, completely misses frank's insult and just stares blankly at him in surprise with raised brows

"what? since when?"

"the hell you mean since when? since I was born. ain't you s'posed to be some kinda genius or somethin'? I really gotta explain simple shit to you-"

"castle isn't italian-"

"no, but castiglione is. it got shortened to castle when my parents moved here from sicily-"

"and how the hell would I know that-"

"well maybe if you shut the fuck up every once in awhile-"

and this is where you have to intervene and redirect the conversation bc while them fighting over you was exciting and truthfully hot at first, it seems like they've spent a better half the night fighting each other, and that simply isn't acceptable

so you warn them that if they don't start playing nice, you'll leave them on the date alone together and go get your own dessert somewhere else

needless to say they suddenly start showing model behavior and redirect their attention where it should've been all along: on you

and i'll let your imagination run wild with how well that date goes and if you invite them both up for a drink or two ;)

[kpopsexstories]

Kissing Booth Ep. 2 – Jisung jealously watches Chenle have sex with a girl

‘Kissing Booth’ is a fictional podcast hosted by boyfriends Chenle and Jisung. In it they discuss love, sex and relationships. This Kissing Booth Tumblr series is excerpts from the couple's most sexual conversations on the show.

EPISODE 2: JEALOUS

Chenle: Have you ever been jealous of me?

Jisung: Never. You're not that big of a deal.

Chenle: *Pfft* I got more Instagram followers than you.

Jisung: Do you? Are you sure?

Chenle: Yeah! Of course I'm sure. Why do you never believe me?

Jisung: You're not the most reliable person…

Chenle: Let me rephrase. Have I ever made you jealous?

Jisung: Yeah. Lots of times. There was a period when I couldn't even stand another person looking at you. You're mine!

Chenle: So possessive. That's usually my style.

Jisung: You like it though. I don't know, you're a possessive boyfriend that's for sure, but I think in the right circumstances I'm even worse.

Chenle: Like when?

Jisung: Remember Lea?

Chenle: Ah, Lea! Now that was good sex!

Jisung: Fuck you! It was average at best.

Chenle: How would you know?

Jisung: …

Chenle: What?

Jisung: *Smirks*

Chenle: Whaat?

Jisung: I was jealous, okay! We should never have been on that stupid break. You made my heart ache.

Chenle: I love it when you're jealous.

Jisung: I was sooo jealous, I'm not ashamed to admit it. I know she was your childhood love but you were mine and I hated her.

Chenle: You don't hate her. Besides you she's still my best friend.

Jisung: I know, I don't hate her now. But back then I did.

Chenle: So… How would you know if our sex was good? What haven't you told me?

Jisung: Don't kill me okay?

Chenle: What? Just tell me!

Jisung: I heard you. I got curious. So I snuck in.

Chenle: Lol, what the hell?

Jisung: Hey, it's not my fault you didn't lock the freakin’ door! And I can't believe you didn't notice me. I snuck in and hid in the closet. I saw the whole thing. No way some girl was gonna take my baby from me and violate him without my consent.

Chenle: I can't believe you're telling me this now, live on air. I had no idea!

Jisung: Yeah, you didn't. Because I'm awesome.

Chenle: And jealous?

Jisung: So jealous! When I first heard you guys it felt like I was gonna die. When I saw your cute little but on top of her I wanted to scream. But then it got kinda exciting.

Chenle: Please don't tell me you…

Jisung: I did.

Chenle: IN MY CLOSET?

Jisung: In your underwear actually. I didn't have any tissues.

Chenle: WHILE WATCHING MY GIRLFRIEND?

Jisung: She wasn't your girlfriend.

Chenle: But we were on a break!

Jisung: Worst time of my life.

Chenle: I fucking love you.

Jisung: …

Chenle: Lol, I can't believe you did that!

Jisung: And I'm telling you, you weren't that great.

Chenle: Oh shut up.

Jisung: You sort of just lay there…

Chenle: I was enjoying it. It was nice to be the top for once.

Jisung: I don't think you call it that when it's with a girl.

Chenle: Whatever. But was I really that bad?

Jisung: No, you were freakin’ hot baby. The way your little ass moved up and down. It made me so hard.

Chenle: Thank you. That's what I want to hear.

Jisung: …but I don't think Lea would agree. She didn't seem that into it.

Chenle: Oh fuck you.

Jisung: *Winks* Any time.

Chenle: Well at least you were jealous. That's all that matters to me.

Jisung: So jealous babe. Promise me you'll never do that to me again.

Chenle: Promise me you won't sneak into my room when I'm having sex.

Jisung: I don't need to.

Chenle: Yes you do or we're over.

Jisung: No, because I'm already in the room with you, stupid.

Chenle: Right. I didn't like that break either. Promise we'll never break up again?

Jisung: Why should I?

Chenle: The only one you can have sex with ever again is me okay?

Jisung: Hmm, I'm not sure I can promise that. What if I have a Lea in my life too?

Chenle: Jisung Park! Promise me!

Jisung: Why? Jealous much?

Chenle: Whatever dude. I didn't sneak into your room.

Jisung: Ehm, that's not true!

Chenle: When?

Jisung: Like all the time when we were trainees.

Chenle: Oh, right. Yeeah, I did do that a lot didn't I?

Jisung: All the freakin’ time.

Chenle: And I was great wasn't I?

Jisung: The best! So horny. We were so inexperienced back then but laying there secretly touching each other felt really good. Makes my heart flutter just thinking about it.

Chenle: I guess it was always better with you.

Jisung: Because I'm jealous and possessive?

Chenle: Because I love you. I don't actually want you to ever feel jealous. I love you too much to want to hurt you like that. I'm sorry.

Jisung: It's alright. Like I said, Lea didn't think you were that good anyway so I'm not worried.

Chenle: Whatever dude.

[arminsesposa]

Vampire (Female reader x 1610! Miles Morales)

Bleeding me dry like a damn vampire

Yes this is based off Olivia Rodrigos New song, I’m incorporating some of the lyrics as well, lyrics in between and in red.

Miles flaking on you on your 1 year anniversary. You just want the truth.🦅

DO NOT COPY MY WORK,

Reblogs are greatly appreciated! :)

As you were getting ready for your 1st year anniversary date with Miles, you were remembering, all your special moments. From when he asked you out, to when you guys would watch movies at your house, or eat dinner at the Morales’s house. You truly loved that boy. Seeing him all the time, spending quality time with him, whether it was chatting or just cuddling and the way you would catch him stare at you. He made your heart flutter. Even despite what’s been happening.

I see the parties and the diamonds sometimes when I close my eyes

Lately, you realized Miles has been acting different. Its been killing you deep inside. You loved this boy dearly, only to have him show up 30- or an hour late to important events. The constant lies and excuses when all you asked for was the truth. You were tired of it and part of you wanted to snap. Keeping it deep down wasn’t helping as for you it was your final straw. It’s not that he didn’t love you, but he’s been ignoring you more often lately. You felt like like he’s been hiding something from you. Maybe an after school program he joined? Was it another girl? There is that blonde girl but… Miles wouldn’t. Would he? Those thoughts quickly passed through your head as you finished apply your makeup. Miles was the one to ask you out as he told you he planned something special for your anniversary. So maybe things will be better this time. You hoped.

I loved you truly, Gotta laugh at the stupidity

As you waited for Miles to pick you up, you stood there in front of your house waiting for him. You were dressed pretty fancy, as the neighbors who walked by just stared at you, you cringed deep down. You texted miles hoping he would answer but to your surprise he didn’t answer. 10 minutes passed by, as your legs grew tired of standing. Your older brother came to your rescue, as he offered you by dropping you off where you two were supposed to meet. “Maybe he has something planned for you” your brother said giving you a sense of false hope. You looked outside the window as the sun began to set. A beautiful mix of Orange and purple spread out throughout the whole sky. You had a slight smile as you remembered the numerous times Miles would bring you to his apartments rooftop. The conversations you guys would have up there. About college, life, the universe. Your brother snapped you out of fantasy as he parked his car and turned back to look at you. “We’re here”

Cause I’ve made some real big mistakes

As you entered the busy diner, it was full of romantic couples. Teenagers In puppy love, sharing a basket of fries, Sipping on a vanilla milkshake, as you made your way to the booth where you and Miles had your first date. As the server unironically on roller skates, came by and asked for your order which you politely denied. It was about to 7:30, as you rested your face on your shoulders as Miles was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago. You looked like an idiot. All these tragically in love couples having their most romantic date, as you sat alone in the booth. As you were about to give up your spot on the booth, Miles rushed in messy hair with a bouquet of roses and a polo shirt on as he sat across from you. “Hey” he said out of breath as he handed you the bouquet.

But you make the worst one look fine

The only thing you could do was stare at him as you quietly accepted the bouquet. “I’m sorry I just had to-“ Miles began as inside you snapped. You were tired of him constantly being late. Tired of him making up these excuses. Although he did plan this date, he still managed to show up 30 minutes late and had you wait like an idiot surrounded by all the couples. You wanted the cold hard truth. Although you felt like your heart was about to burst out of sadness you managed to cut him off. “Enough Miles” you managed to say in a whisper as he stared at you in confusion. “Baby what are you talking about?” miles asked in confusion. You felt like the whole diner was staring at you as you began to pour your heart out. “I’m tired of you always being late, tired of the white lies you tell me. I just want the truth. Who’s the girl? Is it that blonde girl you’re always with?” You said as your vision began to get blurry due to your tears. Miles reaction widened as he immediately shook his head in denial. “No baby, I promise you I would never-“ he pleaded. “I’m just tired, Miles” You said as you looked down, you felt your warm tears trickle down your face as you sniffled.

I should’ve known it was strange, you only come out at night.

Miles stared at you heartbroken. He didn’t know how much he was truly hurting you. With juggling being a student, son, Spiderman, and boyfriend, it was overwhelming for him. But he knew that didn’t excuse his actions. Miles felt guilty, he couldn’t tell you that he was Spiderman due to his fear, a villain taking you for hostage or even much worse. Miles didn’t know what to stay as he tried to hold you hand. “I’m not seeing anyone. You’re the only girl I want, the blonde girl, Gwen I can promise you Is just and only a friend” Miles said sincerely as he held your hand tighter. You stared at him with puffy eyes. “Why are you always late? I wait for you all the time, and I’m just tired miles. I want the honest truth now.” You state as you wait for Miles response. His heart drops, knowing that deep down he can’t tell you that he’s Spiderman. He doesn’t want to see you hurt. He would never forgave himself if something were to happen. As a quiet moment happened between you two, Miles spoke up.

I used to think I was smart, but you made me look so naive

“I’m sorry.. I truly can’t tell you. It’s for the greater good” Miles said as he looked down. He couldn’t even make eye contact with you. You looked beyond heartbroken. “Miles, you can tell me anything I promise. I’m here for you” you pleased with him. You just wanted the truth. No matter what it could be. You wanted to be by his side no matter what and whatever he needed to tell you. You were ready. Miles hesitated. He wanted to tell you everything. He wanted to tell you how it all happened. The spider bite, the way he Because Spiderman, the countless times he saved people but yet he didn’t say anything. It was a risk he wasn’t willing to take. “I can’t. I’m sorry, you can’t know” miles said in a serious tone as he looked down. You were beyond angry, as you got up and threw the bouquet of roses at him and stormed off out of the diner.

The way you sold me for parts, you sunk your teeth into me

You were done. Your boyfriend, who you felt so loved and comfortable with him, not telling you what was wrong. You wanted to be there for him, but how could you help someone who doesn’t wanna be helped. As you stormed off, all the lovey dovey couples watched you storm off as Miles grabbed the bouquet and raced after you. “(Y/N), Wait! You don’t understand” Miles begged as you slammed the door. Tears were streaming down your cheek as you felt your heart rip in half. You felt the pain of your heart breaking, as you walked through the crowds on the sidewalk. The boy you loved the most, was lying to your face. You loved him too much, but this was something you couldn’t handle. As Miles tried catching you up, he grabbed your arm and pulled you to an empty alleyway as you glared at him. “What do you want!” You said as you cried out. This wasn’t how you thought your one year anniversary was going to be like. You know deep down you deserved better. “(Y/N), i love you, i really do and you don’t understand how hard this is for me” miles said out of breath as his hands hanged on his sides. “ I want to tell you, I really do, I just.” Miles paused. “I would never forgive myself if anything happened to you.” Miles said as he stared at you. He only wanted to protect you. “If you really care, then tell me. Tell me right now. Tell me why you’re always late for anything we plan. Why you’ve been making excuses. Where have you been all this time? Miles Morales, if you truly love me you’ll tell me right now” you declare staring at him making direct eye contact. Miles stays quiet. He can’t ruin your relationship. You’re the only person he can go too, someone he trusts and loves, but it was now or nothing. As miles stared down at the Bouquet, he remembers your first date. After getting the courage to ask you out during AP Spanish, he planned for you two to go to a nearby arcade, until a criminal robbing a nearby bank ruined the plans as the arcade shut down, Miles was disappointed, he couldn’t take you out but you two spent the rest of the evening at the diner, where you split a Oreo milkshake. Miles had to tell you. He didn’t care anymore if it was a risk, as he would be there to protect you. He promised to himself in thought as he knew what must be done.

Bloodsucker, FameFucker

“(Y/N), I’m…. I’m spid-“ Before miles could even finish you cut him off. You saw the guilty look of shame on Miles face as he looked down at the bouquet and it clicked. He was probably seeing someone else. The way his behavior was throughout the whole night and the way he kept avoiding the question, you weren’t ready for your boyfriend to admit he was cheating on you in an alleyway. “I’m sorry miles. I’m done. Talk to me when you get your shit straight” you cussed out in anger and sadness as you walked away, leaving miles alone. It struck him like a truck. He was too much in his head he didn’t realize he left you standing there like an idiot. All he could was watch you fade away as you blended in with the packed crowd. As you stormed off, you were tired. Tired of being lied too, tired of how long you waited for Miles to pick you up, only for him to be late. You were beyond devastated how your 1st year anniversary turned into a disaster. As you walked home with your makeup a mess, your eyes puffy from crying, you couldn’t get Miles out of your head. No matter everything that happened part of you still loved him. As you walked home, maybe it was your puffy eyes from crying, or the overwhelming feeling of being tired since you didn’t notice how colorful everything became all of a sudden sorta in a glitchy way, or how the walls began to look… different. In fact you didn’t realize, until you felt your stomach dropped as you found yourself falling through a portal.

Bleedin’ me dry, like a goddamn vampire

Maybe this’ll get a Part 2 💃🏽

[beanghostprincess]

My take on OPLA's "Zoro vs. Mihawk" fight because I love to criticize the things I like

I'm gonna start by saying that I love the live-action. I'm obsessed. The casting is great and the set is stunning. However, despite enjoying OPLA I do have a lot of complaining to do about it because I absolutely love analyzing media and characters. That being said, I don't want this post to make it look like I am disregarding the directors and writers here. They did a good job with what they had but I personally think I would've done it a lot differently.

So... Let's start!

The thing that bothers me the most about episode 5 (episode that I honestly consider to be the worst in a lot of ways and for a lot of reasons) is that they intend to make it look like Zoro has this intense and personal connection with Luffy. A devotion that makes him so damn worried and self-conscious about losing the fight that he starts crying (or at least they tried to make Mackenyu cry? I'm not sure there. But he cries in the manga so, yeah. 'Frustration' perhaps is a better word). And Zoro does feel that devotion towards Luffy from the very beginning. The guy literally changed his life! But that is obvious and visible in the manga/anime because we can see Luffy making promises and being demanding and direct and literally a damn sunshine to Zoro. They have this conversation about him getting back his swords, about being the king of the pirates... There's this connection between them. One that says:

"You'll be my first mate" and "I'd literally give my life for you"

Damn, if there was a trope for love at first sight only for captains and their first mates? They would be the damn blueprint.

But OPLA wasn't able to make them show that connection because most of the scenes are rushed and/or skipped. And I understand. I truly do. It's just a live-action and the manga is long as hell. But the thing is... Don't expect me to believe Zoro's devotion is real if you haven't even shown me how it started. The root of the problem isn't the fight or his speech in episode 5, but the lack of emotional connection in episode 1 that they could've easily fixed by reordering the scenes.

So, regarding everything pre-ep 5: If they had shown us their relationship better, episode 5 wouldn't have felt so... Rushed? Out of character? And I don't mean out of character in a 'Zoro wouldn't say/do this' way (because of course he would, and did canonically) but in a 'OPLA!Zoro wouldn't say/do this because he hasn't experienced the exact same things that manga!Zoro has' way.

Yes, it's a live-action, but as a stand-alone? Zoro's behavior doesn't make any sense. That also happens with Nami, but this post isn't about our weather queen. Not today, at least.

Before I get into the fight I must also say that, even if I appreciated Zoro/Nami's dynamic and scenes, I find them completely unnecessary and useless. Firstly, because those scenes would've been better if they had used them to build their relationship with Luffy and not only between them. Secondly, because the writers do absolutely nothing with them. The relationship is only used as a plot device to foreshadow Arlong Park. And it bothers me because they could've done that without taking scenes from Luffy/Zoro and Luffy/Nami. This also happened because they decided to put so many scenes with the Marine, by the way, but I guess everyone is aware of that already.

The thing about the straw hat pirates is that they're a family. There are different connections/relationships/dynamics between them. But the main focus and reason why they joined is always Luffy and only Luffy. OPLA wanted to make them all a family in the first episodes and share all the important scenes together when actually that doesn't work like that. Everyone in the crew builds different dynamics with Luffy with personal and private scenes, and I think they took that magic away from them in OPLA wanting them all to share the same experiences for no reason. They don't build private connections (besides Nami/Zoro, but that doesn't even work in the end). This is why I like OPLA!Sanji so so much! His scenes with Luffy are immaculate.

Basically: The writers decided that since it's a live-action and most of the viewers will be already OP fans, it doesn't matter if they make Zoro's devotion exist without actually showing it because we already know he's devoted to his captain. So they take that info, make it happen, and they give no explanation to new watchers as to why the hell this dude who is supposed to not trust people easily, suddenly trusts Luffy so much. Even if it's a live-action, you should never take things for granted as a writer.

Now that I've established how it doesn't make sense for Zoro to act the way he does due to the lack of scenes with Luffy pre-episode 5, I'm gonna talk about my overall opinion about the fight itself and Zoro's pretty iconic speech to Luffy.

I'm no expert with fighting scenes but I've watched enough movies and animes (and you don't even need to, to be honest) to know that it is incredibly rushed. There's no tension. And the choreography is so... Dull. The only fight scenes I enjoyed were the ones in episode 1. This, in my opinion, is mostly the director's fault. The shots are either boring or too exaggerated and the whole fight is just not enjoyable to watch. The setting also makes it really empty. Everyone is just... There... Together... Netflix, don't be so scared of putting space between characters, I'm begging you. A bit of theatre directing is what this scene needs.

Also, Sanji isn't there and it bothers me a lot. Like a whole lot. Like a lot lot. And the fact that Nami is there when she shouldn't be (and also holds Usopp's hand? Like girl, chill, you've only interacted twice? They should've added Usopp to that drinking game scene if they wanted them to grow closer like that before the fight. But of course, Usopp is just the comedy relief for Netflix) also bothers me a lot lot lot.

In general, OPLA's shots aren't my cup of tea, and the overuse of comic-like moments dividing the screen made me cringe more than once (the first time was funny. Referencing the manga. But then it gets tiring. Mostly because the shots are just too close to their faces). Also, what's up with the corners being blurry all the time and the shots being extremely close to their faces? I don't know if it's just me but it's uncomfortable to watch.

Leaving that aside, Mackenyu did a great job with the fighting scenes. Love him to death. Kissing him from a distance. Great work.

Now, the thing that bothers me the most...

Zoro's speech.

Not only do they skip the important part where Zoro calls Luffy "The king of the pirates" but they also make it extremely dull and boring. It's not Mackenyu's fault. He's a good actor. However, I do think that this scene didn't need a close approach between the characters.

What this scene needs is passion. Frustration. Tears. Screaming. Relief when Zoro realizes Luffy isn't disappointed. Determination when he decides to keep fighting and training to become the world's greatest swordsman. And I think Mackenyu's performance would've been way better if they had given him the right indications and space between him and Iñaki.

I always say that physical space is great for scenes like this one because it challenges the actor to express their emotions without physical contact. A close and sweet approach is also good, but I think they should've just used that for the scene in episode 6 where Zoro wakes up. Them being physically close then is good, because there's a bond and they want and crave touching each other. However, after losing a fight and almost disappointing his captain? What Zoro needed was to openly cry to the sky and yell at Luffy that he would become the world's greatest swordsman. For himself. For Kuina. And for Luffy, his captain.

It's a very emotional scene and I get that it's complicated to do the same thing the manga does... But it really isn't that hard to give Mackenyu space so he has to yell and be openly frustrated. It seems like he wanted to cry. Like he was trying to cry. But the tears didn't come out because having Iñaki and the others so damn close didn't give him the space he needed to yell his emotions.

On the other hand, even if I don't like this scene and I prefer Luffy and Zoro to not be so close to each other, this would've kind of worked if they had had some connection and scenes pre-episode 5. But they don't. So, yeah, whatever.

Also (and this is just me being me) I wouldn't have used an aerial shot of them for the final scene. Zoro is satisfied now. He faints but he's happy. He proceeds to wake up happy in the next episode. So why not end it with his smiling face as he faints? That's also a recurring topic in the One Piece world! Make it reference Roger and foreshadow Loguetown and Marineford. These directors aren't being creative, let me tell you.

Overall, you can tell that I didn't like how they portrayed this episode, especially this fight/speech. However, before I end this post I want to say that I am aware of how hard it is to make a live-action and it's completely understandable to make scenes shorter and rushed. It's obvious that everyone working on this live-action loves One Piece, and even if I don't like a lot of the things they're doing, that doesn't mean I can't feel the effort and love they put (mostly the actors. The cast is outstanding and extremely sweet!) making this show.

I have more complaints about episode 5 (mostly about Nami's character) but this was just to talk about Zoro and the fight! Let me know in my inbox if you want more of my opinions on OPLA or just want to tell me something! <3

Editing TikTok account where I'm posting my One Piece edits: seraspring

[sungbeam]

spread some love !

talk about your favourite mutuals and why you like them

hi anon! thanks for sending this in :') im always so bad at posting these things, but i can def do this one. i don't know if i would classify them specifically as favorites, but more so people i've interacted with the most 😭

@justalildumpling : i don't even need to go on besides saying that this woman is my soulmate. "in another life" but we're gonna beat the universe and meet in every life, type of connection. the girl who has seen me at my worst and has still treated me with as much kindness and compassion and care as she did the first time. i feel like in certain ways, we're kind of polar opposites, but also the same? i mean, on paper we can be so different, but when we talk abt what we like and dislike, when we laugh together, it all becomes something of the same and she restores my faith in other people again. she's the person who constantly makes me want to be a better person.

@ethereal-engene : one of my two beloved 姐姐's on this site skfnrknf but i remember talking to ash so many nights abt just any and everything. i am so happy that we're comfortable enough to be able to joke around, share our niche interests, have deep conversations, and even pen pal!! like i think it's crazy how SIMILAR our families are; we could legitimately be long lost sisters haha but also the blood of the covenant runs thicker than the water of the womb sometimes, so that makes sense. she's one of my comfort people, and honestly, i feel like we both come out of nowhere with some topics, but either person will hop right into the convo regardless and just vibe 🤧

@winterchimez : my second 姐姐 on this site !! my older sisters def take care of me well and i am so grateful for that :')) ally is always so supportive and yet so energergizing to talk to. she's def seen a lot of my brainstorming and i feel very comfortable bouncing ideas off her. she's always so generous with me too, like care packages??? RAH 😭 obviously, i love her for reasons besides the material goods, but it's a love language nonetheless. ally is prob one of the warmest and most welcoming presences on this hellsite tbh, so if ur ever looking for a new friend/mutual, she's the best.

@loveliestfelix : nana is another reason why im still around. i like to thank that beomgyu drabble every day for kickstarting our friendship because i have never met someone i have had such lengthy and fun brainstorming sessions with. nana is the type of person i would love to meet irl and just share stories over coffee with, though i feel like i always associate her with train rides and coffee now HAHA she's also one of my greatest writing inspirations, like i was and have always been blown away by her mind, and her word counts. i love calling her the queen of angst, and you will never be disappointed when reading something of hers.

@jaehunnyy : chip's been here for a really long time, like guys, no one can compete when she's been here since i had park jisung as my pfp and she had jeno as hers 😭 i think i really treasure our friendship and how much it's grown over the past two years :')) so much has happened over that time, and i think that if i met her in real life, i would just be blown away by how pretty she is like TT anyways,, i always love talking to her because of how much chaotic energy we create when we do, like i feel like we can power an entire city grid with how much chaos we make, and it's all the better for it. i love her very much, and i hope she understands just how wonderful of a person and friend she is.

@mosviqu : oh, my beloved bar, i love u to bits and pieces. i think recently you've become one of the few reasons why im still here writing and posting. like i am so utterly, from the bottom of my heart, grateful for all of your support and the love you've given and shown me. and even when we moved to dms to converse, i just realized how cool you are as a person, and how similar we are (in the best way possible). it's really nice to be able to connect with a person on multiple levels, and im really happy that was the case with us :') as soon as i saw ur love for tomorrow by chanyeol, i knew there would be something more to our friendship. i am so very fond of you, and your writing blows me away every time i read it.

@zzoguri : moni :( i hope ur doing well, friend, and i know you haven't been active here lately but i do wish you all the best. i love how passionate and committed you are to improving in writing and developing your own creative writing style, and it's so impressive to read your writing in general :') i love the confidence you advocate for yourself, and how real you are. thanks so much for being a friend; i just really appreciate all the support and hype you've given me during my time on deobiblr, like thank you for being such a thoughtful person.

@wuahae : cat and i have definitely interacted more off this site than on this site, but i felt that it was dire she was included here nonetheless. like bro, thank you for literally being the reason i come out of my apartment (or in most cases, invite people to my apartment), and for thinking of me! i think i once told you how hard it is to find friends in college, but you've made my experience here far less lonely. i love getting dinner with you, planning outings, and making weird animal noises together on the streets 😭 also, cat's writing is literally so poetic, and just her explaining to me her plot ideas tears visceral reactions out of me TT

@yunhoszn : i feel like me and fawn are low-key on the same wavelength a lot of the times, but in general, i think fawn's just such a rad person. i've told her once or twice before but i genuinely love her writing style because it has so much personality in it. it just makes reading her fics such a fun and enjoyable experience. also even off this site, i have so much fun interacting with her, like just commenting on her instagram posts like the gremlin i am, i know she's gonna hit me with the best response back skfnkejd (waiting for the day i go to where u r so u can do my makeup low-key... ur so fly, pls do my makeup...)

@goldenhypen : em, my lovely twin :')) i know our interactions have def decreased, but i don't think that's decreased the fondness we hold for one another. i remember when em first started interacting with my works and then followed me, i literally rolled off the couch cuz i started fangirling 😭 and she is one of the most genuine and brightest presences here. she is a follow forever, bro, you better follow her forever. i just adore her compassion for others and her absolutely adorable fic concepts, and omg don't even get me started on her work ethic 😭 i wished u the best everyday you had requests, i don't know how u did it. you are literally superhuman.

@hqrana : i haven't spoken with noa in quite awhile, but im guessing it's cuz she's girlbossing her way through to that nursing program 🤧 my favorite woman in stem girl in this hellsite, she is my beloved xnonie 😭 i think i just appreciate noa's undeniable presence and character so much, like she brings so much energy to my inbox whenever she's here, and her support of my ideas and fics just makes me 🙇🏻‍♀️ like thank you for being here. and to know we both love marvel and taylor swift? i feel like she has to be like,, my best friend? like she needs to be my best friend?? sending hugs and well wishes your way, always.