#but i guess it does because i instantly felt attacked

[ur-friendly-nbhd-cardassian]

Hey folks who go "This character wouldn't go for this gender"...

We get it. You're a certain way and so you tend to see the world through your own personalised filter. So do I and everyone else, though. Are we not valid?

And sure, no one is forcing you to consume content that makes you uncomfortable. You can avert your eyes any time, as long as you try to be tactful about it and not hurt anyone.

But just for once I'd like to see a "I'm [a certain way] and I don't hate on people who have it different" post instead. Just like I'm figting my own decades long programming by exposing myself to pretty pictures and stories whenever the two people/characters make sense to me, you might wanna do that with whatever makes you uncomfortable for whatever reason.

You know why? Because you're kinda being just like the people who say these things about your deal. The very people you might've been hurt by your whole life. And I don't feel like you mean to send this sort of signal (I hope you don't).

It doesn't feel nice having to read these comments. It doesn't feel nice having your choice devaluated, for any reason. Maybe consider that the next time you feel like dropping a post.

[ozzgin]

I'm the anon who asked if your requests are open and i got busy assignments + presentations that i almost forgot about the request but now i remembered and it's based on my dream i saw that night..

How about a vampire who lost his relic (presumably a ring) and reader happens find it and tries it on, now the vampire is all panicking because guess what? That was a betrothal relic and it has binded the vampire's soul with the one of reader. They can't pull it out/take it of.. oh well, now they are stuck and obviously the vampire hates the idea of being stuck with a pesky human but hey they are kinda stupid..? How tf they tripped on thin air? Or how they are still alive even after being food poisoned 5 times a month? Vampire is now babysitter for his human *sighs * what has he gotten himself in..

(Please add yandere elements later on, my brain stoopid but i want a hot Victorian era vampire being obsessed with me ^^ muah!)

(I'm sorry this is so lengthy TT)

Yandere! Vampire x Reader

Featuring a ridiculously lucky Reader who constantly manages to escape a Vampire's assassination attempts. Did someone order a supernatural edition of enemies to lovers?

Content: gender neutral reader, obsessive behavior, mentions of stalking, romcom

[Monster masterlist] [Original works masterlist]

"Are you alright, (Y/N)?" your friends gasp in unison, eyes fixated on the fallen ceramic pot that scarcely missed you, now laying shattered at your feet. You laugh reassuringly and wave your hand in dismissal. "It's the fifth time it happens today. Maybe there's a storm coming?"

From within the shadows, menacing eyes glowing red follow your movements. "Damn it!" The mysterious man curses under his breath. He stares enviously at the bulky ring on your finger. The ring bearing his Family signet, where part of his very soul resides. It has stayed with him for centuries, and somehow, to his utmost shame, he lost it. By the time he rushed back to retrieve it, you were carelessly sliding it down your finger. He wanted to strangle the life out of you right then and there, but he felt it: the immediate surge of contractual power, dominating his will and holding him back from breaking your bones. "It's a little tacky, isn't it?" your friend remarked. You nodded in agreement and tried to remove it, but the metal band tightened around your skin, painfully constricting your digit. It was stuck. It was too late.

Now he has to rely on cheap trickeries like this one. Sure, he may not be able to directly plunge his fangs into your neck, but the bonding curse does not shield you from "accidents", you see. It would be a real shame if that flower pot was to land straight into your head, ending you instantly and thus breaking the connection with him. Except you simply refuse to die. A mystery, a paradox, one that enrages him to no end. It's almost as if the ring is bringing you fortune at the cost of his misery.

"Have you had any luck removing that ugly thing?" the person standing next to you mentions. The vampire lord grits his teeth at the blasphemous words. This is what's become of him: a deceitful buffoon, having to sit and listen to his inheritance being mocked relentlessly. He holds back the urge of shouting that thousands have bled to death in order to forge that magnificence. "Not at all", you respond idly. "I tried taking it to a jeweler, and she said she could try to cut it, but she ended up having a heart attack right in the middle of it. She didn't even look that old, maybe it runs in her family?"

Unbelievable. The thought of reclaiming his relic haunts every second of his day, to the point he's become your shadow. Stalking your every move, your every breath, observing his prey and waiting for an opportunity to strike. He can already picture that pathetic face of yours, twisting in pain, begging for-...huh. Well, look at that, you're reading one of his favorite books. Perhaps you do have a little taste, after all. It won't save you from your terrible fate, but he might skip the prolonged torture.

There's plenty of quotes out there about knowing your enemy in order to guarantee your victory, though one might wonder where the limit of such knowledge resides. Or what counts as useful to begin with. The vampire lord is presently wondering about this very aspect, as he mouths your coffee order from a distance. Less sugar, huh? You did mention losing your sweet tooth. He shakes his head indignantly. Absolutely not! The throb of his heart is fueled by raw hatred and nothing else. One of days he will savour your demise.

Your ridiculous luck might just end today. You've taken a shortcut on your way back home, and didn't expect a shady, burly man to block your exit. A perverted grin stains his face as he approaches you, twiddling with his pocket knife. "Alone at this hour?" You frown and try to find a way out, but the man suddenly begins to heave and convulse before your eyes, grasping at his chest as the skin shrivels and dries. He collapses at your feet, body wilted as if it's been emptied of its vitality. The Vampire Lord clicks his tongue.

To think he'd rush to rescue his sworn enemy, a pitiful mortal like you. He didn't even get the chance to consider the aftermath. You stare at the stranger, confused but observant. Pale skin, crimson eyes, unnaturally sharp canines...and the fact he just drained a living being into a bloodless corpse: everything hints to one possibility. "Are you by any chance a vampire?" you find yourself mumbling. "You must've graduated from Harvard with those deduction skills", he responds sarcastically.

Everything else unfolds in a haze. Wasn't he planning to kill you and retrieve his ring? When the hell did he offer to walk you home to avoid more creeps? Why is he twirling his hair sheepishly whenever you praise his demonic powers? Oh, but it gets worse: why did he suddenly feel the urge to kiss you before returning to his cursed lair? Why did he accept your invitation to spend the night at your place instead? One moment ago, he was doing his best to curse you off this Earth. Now he's tugging stray strands of hair away from your blushing, whining face, asking you if it hurts. Damned human.

"How did you know I like this? Have you been stalking me?" you joke, nudging your undead boyfriend and setting the gift aside. "More or less", he confesses with a yawn. He recalls all that time spent dutifully spying on your oblivious self. "You know, a human like you shouldn't be able to dodge death like that." He turns to you and scans your features. Then, abruptly embarrassed, he ruffles your hair to block you from noticing his blush. "I suppose my failure was the better outcome. It's not too bad, having you around."

[justauthoring]

your hand feels nice in mine.

requested! -> hii loved your natsu fic! 🤭 i’m glad that fairy tail content is coming back. i wanna request something similar w gray.. maybe it’s a hot day n he helps reader

a/n -> honestly it was not my intention to write for fairy tail today... but writing that natsu drabble was so fun and i can't help it im in a fair tail mood lol. also, for the sake of it, let's pretty juvia hasn't joined the guild yet okay?

pairing -> gray fullbuster x f!reader

it was far too hot.

ridiculously hot.

really, it shouldn't even be humanely possible for it to be this hot. hot enough that you were sweating profusely, it building up on your forehead and leaving you feeling gross and sticky. you were thirsty and your movements felt luggish, as if you might just pass out on the spot.

clearly, the universe had something against you because this was starting to feel like a personal attack.

your eyes flicker to your teammate who seems all too unaffected by the heat; which, yes, to be fair was to be expected. gray was an ice wizard and you knew he ran cold, so obviously this heat wasn't impacting him as much. he looked somewhat warm, you guessed, a small build up of sweat lining his forehead.

but he wasn't dragging his feet and he didn't look flushed or uncomfortable. nothing like you at least.

walking ahead of you, gray looks perfectly fine which, unfortunately, is just irritating you more. how was it fair that he was fine while you were practically dying?

"dumb ice wizard with your stupid ice powers and cooling abilities," you mumble to yourself, grouchy and annoyed.

you just wanted this mission to be over but it was looking like you were going to be stuck on this island for a while longer if the fact that you guys hadn't even found your clients target yet was anything to go by. the rest of team natsu had split up in search of them; natsu and happy with lucy and erza with carla and wendy.

which left you with the stupid, unbothered and cool gray.

truthfully, you're not even sure how you're going to even be able fight the damn target when you do reach them because it was so hot!

"are you okay?"

if he hadn't spoken, you would've ended up walking right into gray. but his voice is enough to snap you out of your own sulking, blinking as you stop and meet his gaze. his words seem genuine and you're sure he is concerned but the damn smirk on his lips just pisses you off more.

"fine," you reply sharply, turning to walk past him.

gray reaches for you before you can, his hand wrapping around your arm and halting your steps as he pulls you back towards him.

regrettably, even if his cold hand feels soothing on your skin.

"what—"

gray just lets out a chuckle, shifting you so you're stood in front of him before pressing his palm against your forehead. whatever you'd been about to say promptly falls silent the second it does. instantly, a cold, gentle breeze flows over you, enveloping your entire body in a cooling sensation that has your tensed muscles relaxing.

"oh."

"feel better?"

glancing up at gray, you blink at him, dazed. "much," you admit, nodding, "your magic feels so nice."

gray flushes slightly at your words, the compliment making his insides feel funny as he coughs, trying to pretend like that hadn't affected him. "w-well, i'm glad. you looked pretty miserable."

as the feeling floods you, you start to gather your bearings, now just realizing how close you were to gray. his hand was raised, pressed against your forehead, but his other hand still rested on your arm and the two of you were very close.

you feel your cheeks warm as you lower your gaze.

"th-thank you, gray." you mumble, feeling oddly embarrassed even though you can't reason why. gray was your friend and all he was doing was helping you, his friend, cool down in this ridiculous heat.

there was nothing to be embarrassed about.

still, that couldn't explain the flush on both of your cheeks.

"here," gray shifts, moving his hand and you have to resist the urge to moan at the loss of his hand. he lets go of your arm and moves to stand beside you. and, before you can dwell on the disappointment much longer, gray's face is burning and he's promptly turning away from you, avoiding your gaze.

your eyes then lower, seeing his hand held out towards you, palm inviting.

"gray?"

"hold my hand," he explains, muffled as he shoves his face into his coat collar (surprisingly still on). "i'll keep you cool."

the realization dawns on you, eyes widening. "o-oh," you mumble, forcing the words out as you glance at his hand once again. "okay."

slowly, hesitantly, you slip your hand into his, gray easing into the touch as he threads his fingers through your own, and squeezes.

true to his word, he lets his magic slowly seep out, cooling you and enveloping you in a consant cool sensation. but the heat refuses to fade from your cheeks, all the same, as the two of you avoid each others gaze.

"sh-should we get going?"

"ye-yeah."

-

"y/n?"

"hm?"

"why are you holding gray's hand?"

you snap your attention to lucy at her question, eyes then snapping to gray who's staring back at you, and then finally down to your intwined hands.

a second later, the two of you are pulling away.

"no-no reason!"

"nothing!"

lucy just blinks at the two of you, quirking a knowing brow.

"you guys sure?"

you send a lucy a half-hearted glare, knowing what she's insinuating, and given that she knew more than anyone else there, you refused to let her try and egg you on. "of course," you say firmly, and lucy just laughs. "it was just... hot. gray cooled me down."

hands on her hips, lucy snorts; "okay, then." then, stepping back, she shrugs. "i was just curious."

she leaves the two of you alone and both you and gray stand there for a moment, silent, not sure what to say.

then, gray speaks up; "i didn't mind, you know?"

"hm?" you mumble, meeting his eyes. he just gestures to his hand and your lips part. "oh. me... me neither. it... felt nice." then, you move to clarify; "and not just because of your magic."

"that's good," gray nods, flustered. "i'm glad."

"yeah."

"...wanna... hold hands again?"

you let out a breath of relief. "yes."

[beach-hermit]

(alot of) Elliott headcanons

Some are random, some are unnecessary detailed

-Has a hair and skin care routine (that's why he needs that long to leave his house in the morning)

-Has a drivers licence, but he doesn't like to drive (mainly because he doesn't own a car, since he is in Pelican Town)

-Wears glasses when he reads or writes (I imagine when his kid shows him something on the phone, that he has to first pull out his glasses)

-Twirls his hair when he is concentrating or nervous

-Combs his hair when he's bored, even if it's already perfectly combed

-Can't cook very well, but is always trying his best

-Can sing and likes to sing

-If Elliott didn't became a writer, he would be a musician

-Likes to dance

-Randomly uses other language(s)

-He is confident, especially when it comes to his looks. He likes his appearance, but doesn't brag about it

-Coffee addicted

-Elliott picked up drawing, because he thought it looked easy when he saw Leah doing it without problem

-Likes all the flowers, but the rose especially

-Is a foodie (ofc)

-Doesn't swear. He thinks it's unprofessional and will ruin his vocabulary

-When he's mad or irritated, he'll accidentally say fuck or shit, but will instantly, dramatic cover his mouth in shock

-He doesn't get angry easily, but gets fustrated alot

-Elliott would never resort to violence, if there isn't a reason too (only if he gets attacked or his partner gets attacked)

-Probably had a little drinking problem before he got married, but doesn't like to admit it

-He's lightweight (gets drunk easily)

-Always wears a hair tie on his wrist. Just in case

-Actually doesn't like getting his hands dirty

-He talkes alot and most of the time, people don't really understand him, but they just let him talk

-Elliott uses large words that the average Pelican townie hasn't heard before

-Loves telling bad jokes

-Has no idea how to use a computer

-Carries a small notebook with him, in case a idea pops up for his novel

-Stole from Pierre once because he didn't had enough money, Elliott felt extremely guilty but also didn't wanted to tell Pierre, so he didn't shop there for a few weeks

-He doesn't shave constantly, but when he does, he shave his whole body as soon as he can't see his skin anymore

-He only shaves his beard to make his face look more youthful and to show off his bone structure

-He's always warm

-Elliott sometimes walks around naked in his cabin, mostly in the morning or at night (also in the farmhouse)

-Will occasionally takes morning laps (single and married)

-Has tried smoking once and almost threw up

-If Elliott has a problem with a townie, he just won't speak with them, if the issues wasn't his fault. (He basically waits until they apologize)

-His voice gets higher when he's nervous or scared

-He snores, not extremely loud but you can hear him outside of the room

-Sweats easily

-Elliott is soft spoken, if he's mad tho, his voice ton gets "dark" and even a bit louder

-Elliott's a fast thinker, he always has the "right" thing to say and knows good comebacks

-Elliott knows alot of useless stuff about alot of things

-Remembers the names from people he just met

-Pays attention to small details (people or in books)

-Gets offended when someone uses foul language, in front of him or to him

-He has problems to fall asleep sometimes

-His handwriting is small and in cursive, that almost no one can read, everytime he writes something down for someone, he writes in block letters

-He is expressional, you can tell if he's sad, mad or happy

-Doesn't really celebrate his birthday, for him it means that he'll get older and that makes him depressed

-Elliott is strong

-But he got no combat knowledge

-Falls in love FAST

-Is good at guessing

-Gets spooked easily

-He collects useless stuff like: shells, rocks, leaves and blossoms

-Elliott is resentful, he'll never forgive you for divorcing or cheating, but he'll cry about it for a looooooong time

-Writes love letters and poems, that he wishes to someday he can share with his future spouse

marriage

-When it's a slow, lazy day on the farm, Elliott would just wear a tshirt and sweatpants, when he knows he won't go outside today

-Elliott only shows that side of comfort to his spouse. He'll never walk outside not wearing his signature formal wear, because he likes people to believe that he always dresses that good.

-Doesn't want to stay in a dirty place for too long, that's why he likes to clean the farm house

-Is always paranoid when his spouse comes home too late (even if it's only 5 minutes)

-Preferres gardening work over farming work

-Elliott jobs will be: planting plants, takes care of the greenhouse, laws the lawn, waters everything and remove weed

-Actually took his piano with in the farm house. (would be cool if the piano would be in his farm room or at least a furniture item that you get when marrying Elliot)

-When his spouse is home and tense, he'll give them a massage, draw them a bath or just be there for them

-Elliott will "force" his spouse to take a day off, to just relax and spend some time together

-Will agree on being a house husband

-Now that Elliott has access to a kitchen, he'll try some dish combinations

-Elliott only cooks when his spouse isn't home, so that they can't see the mess Elliott is going to make in the kitchen

-If his spouse is pregnant, he'll take over the farm and other activities for them, so that they have no stress

-Will speand his own money on giving gifts to his spouse or child(ren)

-His spouse may wake up with Elliott's hair on their face

-Elliott needed to get used to sleep in bed with someone, so in the early states, he would take over the whole bed on accident

-Usually calls his spouse: love, dear, honey, sweetheart, sweetie and darling. If the name allowds it, he also gives them a nickname

-If he finds his spouse passed out (and isn't hurt), he carries them all the way home

-If his spouse has long hair, he likes to play with it

-Secretly watches his spouse from afar if they work on the farm

-Puts his relationship experiences into his novel

-He keeps a picture of his spouse (and children) in his wallet

-Elliott always wears the mermaid pendant, it doesn't matter when or where

-Give's his spouse a good night kiss, if they fall asleep before him

-Man loves to cuddle

-Likes to rest his head on his spouse's chest

-When he's in the town, he wears the mermaid pendant and a wedding ring, to show off and let everyone know that he belongs to a wonderful person

NSFW version

[teriri-sayes]

Reactions to Young Master Shield's Chapter 211

TL;DR - Wanderer left after the attack. Cale's and Raon's shield successfully blocked it. Cale and Alberu communication failure. Cale reassures everyone. Alberu tells the truth to Cale about being a legend.

CH and the Wanderer Well, the wanderer quickly left after launching an attack, so we still do not know their identity. We did get another perspective from CH about the differences of their power.

Something like how the lights in CH's darkness served as guideposts, but the lights in the enemy's darkness were traps to lure people to venture further into the darkness.

There was also the part about how the wanderer's power "devoured" everything. Alberu's shield was devoured, and Raon managed to hold on, though part of his shields were devoured. Of course, our Cale's silver shield was untouched.

One more thing about the wanderer. They left instantly, with Raon commenting that they did not use mana to do so. And Cale himself felt that the wanderer was very strong, feeling intimidated for the first time in a while, though he did not outwardly show it.

The Misunderstandings This is not TCF without the misunderstanding cliche. Cale and Alberu had a communication failure... 🤣🤣🤣

Cale: *looks at Alberu from afar* Alberu: *meets eyes with Cale and nods* Alberu: (You can leave. I'll take care of everything) Cale: (I understand, I should reassure everyone who's anxious) Cale: *walks to the mic* Alberu: (No, what's he doing? I signalled to him to go, so why is he going to talk?)

And it did not end there. The people's reactions to Cale's words were also funny. 🤣🤣🤣 When Cale was talking and some time afterwards, they were all shocked and silent. But everyone began misunderstanding when Cale had left.

I think it was because Cale explained that the enemy was targeting this "world". So everyone thought he was fighting against a bigger entity than Arm. Even the people from other continents had a misunderstanding about the Roan Kingdom because of Cale. 😂

Cale was relieved that his speech was "cancelled" and quickly left. He thought it was natural that everyone was too shocked with what happened, so they did not applaud when he was done. But Alberu's reaction after Cale's speech was "Does this guy really want a slacker life?" He was genuinely curious... 🤣🤣🤣

Ending Remarks Today was a funny chapter with all the misunderstandings. And the last scene too:

"…" Cale closed his eyes tightly without saying a word. Alberu said calmly. "You are a legend." "Damn it." It was Cale who spouted curses in the face of the crown prince.

I guess we'll see more of people's reactions to Cale's speech next chapter. Anyway, here is the full transcript of Cale's speech:

“It’s a pleasure to meet everyone.” “Damn it.” “Silence.” “Everyone, please be silent.” “Don’t panic.” “The shield will not break.” "Everyone must have been very surprised, so I am grateful that everyone remained calm." "From now on, please keep calm and follow the instructions of the academy officials." "And do not worry." "We have already identified the existence of enemies who are aiming for this world and are fighting against them and making preparations. So fret not." "Congratulations on the start of school. I hope that everyone will attain what they want here." "The academy will remain here until you achieve what you want."

[juiles]

I will always need you my love.

Summary: You and your sister are super close but you don't feel like you have a relationship with your mother anymore until she finally sees you.

Type: hurt and comfort, fluff, fluff and more fluff.

Triggers: a small panic attack but nothing else.

Masterlist!

------------------------------------------------------------

My little sister Rose was my entire life. I spent my entire life keeping her safe and doing anything she needs from me. My mom was there as well I suppose but this little girl was my entire world.

I was sitting in her room watching her play with her barbies, having taken a break from her endless game. She looked up at me with a massive pout making me raise her eyebrow at her. “Yes peanut?”

“I’m hungryyyyyyyyyy…” She whined playfully making me laugh.

“So lets go get something to eat then!” I said excitedly making her laugh. I stood up and scooped her up placing her on my hip. She instantly wrapped her legs around my waist and her arms around my neck leaning her head on my shoulder. “What does my princess want?”

“Your mac and cheese!!!” She said bouncing slightly in my arms, I walked down the stairs telling her a story about a princess, I then placed her on the counter after grabbing everything I needed from around the kitchen and put a hand on her leg as I started cooking her favourite food in the world. I grabbed my phone and connected it to the wireless speaker around the house and put on her favourite playlist, which is currently compiled of mostly Encanto, Frozen, and most classic Disney movies. I stirred the pasta into the boiling water and watched as she did a little dance sitting on the counter.

We both turned and smiled as our mom walked into the kitchem, putting her bag on the island before walking over to us. She placed a kiss on my head then smothered Rose with kisses. “Mac and Cheese?” She asked motioning to the ingredients laid out. “Let me guess, the princess requested it?”

I laughed and nodded leaning against the counter. “She’s just so cute!” I said looking at the 4 year old now clinging to our moms hand as she played with her rings. “I can’t say no to her. Anyways, we need some groceries so I figured I would take her to the store after we eat, a little trip before bedtime.”

“You don’t have to baby. I can do that if you want.” Scarlett said with a soft smile towards me. “Or we could all go together?” The smile on my face grew and both of us instantly started nodding. “I’ll take that as a yes!”

“I love shopping with mama and sissy!!” Rose said bouncing on the counter, mum placed her hands on her knees to keep her from bouncing off the counter. “I know princess.”

I smiled softly as I stepped away to finish the food before putting it in bowls and the three of us sat at the table and ate. After we finished, mum took rose upstairs to get ready and I cleaned up from dinner before grabbing my shoes and jacket. I looked out the window and saw mums car already gone, my heart sank. I know she loves me but sometimes she gets so focused on Rose, she forgets that I also exist. I felt tears well up in my eyes and I slowly made my way to the couch, sliding down to be curled up against the arm rest, my knees pulled up to my chest.

I must have fallen asleep because I woke up around an hour later to the door opening and Rose screaming. I jumped up, forgetting I had been crying and ran towards the door to find Rose, red in the face, slumped on the floor screaming. I quickly moved forward and scooped her up. She thrashed around for a few minutes before realizing it was me and her arms wrapped around my neck and her screams turned into sobs into my neck.

“Y/n?” I heard my moms voice making me look up at her before quickly turning on my heel and made my way to Rose’s room. I took her jacket and shoes off and had her calm and curled up in my arms on her bed. I rubbed her back as she sniffled.

“What happened princess?” I murmured into her dirty blonde hair, she pulled her head out of my neck and looked up at me, her red and tear stained face breaking my heart.

“Mama forgot you… I sleep and mama no bring you to store…” She muttered making my eyes well up. I quickly swallowed the lump that reformed in my throat at the thought of my mother forgetting about me yet again and I quickly smothered her in kisses.

“It’s okay rosie… I was really sleepy anyways so I had a nap.” I said smiling at my baby sister, she sniffled and nodded before burying back into me. “Why don’t we get you in the bath and in bed. I’ll sing you, your song tonight okay?” she nodded excitedly and with a real amile on her face, she ran to the bathroom that joined our rooms together. I followed quickly and ran her a bath. I helped her take her clothes off and she climbed into the tub.

With a little help from me, she got her body washed then I washed and conditioned her hair before rinsing it out. I sat back and let her play for a little before I picked her up in her fluffy towel and took her back into her room. We got her changed into her pyjamas and I brushed her hair out and put it into two French braids. She laid down in her bed and I tucked her in before singing to her.

“You are my sunshine, my only sunshine, you make me happy, when skies are grey, you’ll never know dear, how much I love you, please don’t take my sunshine away.” I sang to her, my raspy voice putting her to sleep almost right away. I kissed her head and turned towards her door to see my mom standing there, tears running down her face. I shot her a look before quietly going through our bathroom and closing my door as I walked into my room. My mom was stood at my main door when I got in.

“I’m not in the mood…” I muttered sitting on my bed pulling my phone out.

“I need-“

“No. You don’t get to do anything…” I cut her off shooting her a glare. She took a breath and nodded, closing her eyes. “You forgot me again. Mom you forgot all about me! It was my idea to bring her to the store and we talked about it over dinner!”

“You need a break…” She said quietly making me look up at her. “I see what you do for your sister y/n. I see how much you do for me. It’s not fair. You’re 17 years old, you shouldn’t be raising your sister but I’m always so busy that I just let you do it. I love you baby… I won’t let you do this alone anymore…” My eyes widened at hearing her words and as she turned around, I threw myself on her back hugging her tightly from behind. She managed to turn in my arms and pulled me closer to her.

“I never ever meant to make you feel like I don’t care about you or that I forgot about you. I thought you wouldn’t enjoy doing things with me anymore because you’re a teenager. That you don’t need me anymore. You’ve always been so independent but you are still my baby. My first born, and I’m so sorry ever made you feel less than.”

I just sobbed into her neck, one hand going up to wrap my fingers in her hair, the other clinging to the back of her shirt, afraid to let go. “I’ll always need you mama…”

She rubbed my back, her other hand, scratching my scalp, something that always calmed me down. She picked me up and carried me over to my bed. She pulled me into her lap and smothered my head in kisses. “And I will always need you love.”

[wheredafandomat]

The Royal Ruse 👑

Prince! Loki x Asgardian reader

18+ | this fic contains angst, eventual smut, probably some bad language, little bit of a slow burn?

Chapter 1 Next

“Well then I’ll marry.” Loki declared, almost triumphantly as if he had just solved the biggest problem known to the kingdom of Asgard.

“Loki, you can’t be serious.”

“I am” he insisted, pausing his pacing “if marriage is what it takes to get the throne then I am to wed.” Loki stated.

“And who will you marry?”

“There are a few ladies in which I am courting, I’ll simply marry one of them and then take my rightful title as King of Asgard.” He began to grin.

“And who’s to say any of these maidens will agree to marry you?”

“The promise of a throne” Loki shrugged as if the answer was simple and obvious “I myself wouldn’t even turn that down and I’m already a prince” he scoffed “I’m sure any of them would be delighted to marry me. They could even been Queen consort for a few decades and then perhaps they’ll get bored and then leave or if not, perhaps an accident befalls them and—”

“Loki!” He was cut off.

“Remind me, why am I even talking to you.” Loki sighed, annoyed by the interruption.

“Because I’m the only person you trust.”

“That’s right.” Loki agreed, turning towards the clone of himself he had deployed to reason with.

“What you need to do is find someone who will be willing to pretend to be in love with you up until a wedding occurs where they will then disappear leaving you crowned King of Asgard.” It plotted.

“You’re right” Loki smiled “I’ll find some sort of hopeless maiden and promise her some golden coins or something in return for her hand in marriage.” Loki declared.

The following day, Loki decided to go on a walk to clear his head. Like most walks, this one consisted of visiting the more lowly parts of Asgard where the peasants and working folk resided meaning hearty mead and the occasional leg up in the back of the brewery. Loki often imagined the look on his fathers face if he ever discovered that he frequented such a dingy place, risking the integrity of the palace and all its occupants; it made the whole clandestine visit that more appealing, that more desired. He walked through one of the alleyways, picturing Odin’s face before he felt a weight crash against his chest followed by a yelp.

“Watch where you’re going.” He instantly spoke, assuming the figure standing to their feet was a drunkard.

“Likewise.” You scoffed, pushing his steadying hand on your forearm away. Once you were on your feet, firmly rooted onto the ground, you looked up at your attacker, narrowing your gaze. “I feel like I’m supposed to know who you are.” You challenged suspiciously.

“I guess I just have one of those faces.” Loki excused.

“No” you began, grabbing his chin as you inspected him “you look familiar, really familiar.” You continued, the man pulling away from your touch.

“Unhand me deprived wench.” He scorned, stepping backwards causing you to gasp as it hit you.

“You’re the pri—”

“Shhh.” He silenced you, covering your mouth with his hand. “You know not what you speak of. Why would a prince be somewhere as unpleasant as here?” He queried.

“You know, Thor sometimes comes here.” You replied.

“He does?”

“Yes.” You nodded.

“Well I’ll be sure to—”

“Ha!” You beamed “you are Loki.”

“Fine” he relented “but don’t breathe a word of my being here to anyone.” He warned menacingly.

“Okay.” You shrugged just as Loki began reaching into his pocket. “A-are you trying to buy my silence?” You asked, watching him rummaging through his pocket.

“Yes, how much will it cost?” He asked.

“Don’t worry, I won’t tell anyone, besides, who’d believe me, I’m just a deprived wench.” You huffed.

“Sorry.” Loki apologised.

“Anyways, I’m just on my way home so if you’d excuse me.” You dismissed.

“Of course.” Loki spoke, moving out of your way, his eyes rounding when he realised you were going into the little door that was behind him. “This is where you live?” He questioned almost aghast.

“No, there’s a magical portal inside that transports me to one of the rooms in the palace” you answered sarcastically “yes, this is where I live.”

“It’s tiny.” Loki noted, stepping towards the door and looking inside.

“You’re insulting me again.” You remarked.

“Sorry.” He apologised again.

“I would offer you something to eat but no.” You decided, walking further inside and leaving the door open.

“No?” Loki spoke, raising an eyebrow as he cautiously took your nonverbal invitation and stepped inside.

“No.” You nodded.

“No what?” He replied, recognising the pictures in the callander on your wall; they were all of the palace.

“No, I don’t want to offer you something to eat.” You explained.

“Well I’m not hungry.” Loki argued.

“Good, because I wasn’t offering.” You replied.

“Fine.”

“Fine.” You finished, Loki unmoving as he subtly glanced around your place, eyes lingering on the pictures of the palace you had stuck to the walls. It felt surreal having one of the actual princes stood in your room but you put the whole experience down to having too much mead. You decided to further test this delusion and continue the conversation. “Well unless you’re going to offer me a seat at the royal dining table or an audience with the queen, I suggest you leave.” You broke the silence causing Loki to snap out of his staring competition with the picture of the palace that showed part of his room as he remembered his dilemma.

“And what would you be willing to do for a seat at the royal dining table?” He questioned, smirking making your eyes round in realisation.

“Not that!” You gasped.

“It would only be until I am crowned king.” He tried to explain.

“You want me to sleep with you until you’re a king? What the fu—”

“I think we’re thinking of two different things” Loki interrupted leaving you confused “tell me ummm—what’s your name?”

“Y/n.” You answered.

“Lovely” he clapped “tell me y/n, are you married?”

“No.” You almost laughed, you weren’t even courting anyone.

“Good.” Loki smiled.

“Why is that good?” You questioned defensively.

“I’ve got a proposition for you y/n, let’s discuss this over wine.”

“You’ve got wine?”

“I assumed you did.” He replied, brows knitting.

“I’ve got wine, my wine, you can have water.” You disagreed with him, no longer sure whether this was real or fiction conjured up by your besotted mind. He looked real enough, smelt regal enough.

“And why can’t I have any wine?” He asked incredulously.

“It’s my wine, I don’t see you bringing me any wine. It’s expensive you know, I can’t just waste my wine.” You tried to explain to him.

“Y/n, I am a prince.” Loki reasoned.

“Exactly, you should have bought wine.”

“Well I’ll make sure I remember it for the next time I bump into a stranger in the street.” He puffed, taking a seat as well as the glass of water you were offering him before he began to divulge his proposal.

You listened intensely to his plan, the realisation that he wasn’t a mirage making you a little giddy as you downed your drink, nodding along to words.

“I’ve got one question.” You spoke once he was finished.

“Anything.” He nodded.

“Are you insane?” You asked causing him to sigh. “I mean how would we even do it? We don’t even know eachother.”

“I can easily remedy that.” He assured.

“And pray tell prince, what’s your smart idea?”

“I can create a link between us, it’ll give me access to—” he began, placing his fingers against your temples as you moved your head away “you’ve got to trust me.”

“Well I don’t.” You affirmed.

“What reason other than what I just said would I want to do this with you?” He sneered.

“Fine.” You answered, rolling your eyes before he continued.

“As I was saying, I could create a psychic link between us which would enable us to send thoughts to one another.” He elaborated.

“And why would we need to do that?”

“Because when my mother asks, which she will, things about yourself, my future wife, it’d be good if I could actually answer. Vice versa” he clarified “you’ve got to know a little about me.”

“I know two things” you grinned “arrogant, prince.”

“Behave” he cautioned “so y/n, for the promise of a fortune, would you play the part of my doting betrothed?” He asked, looking into your eyes.

“Yes.” You replied with a small nod, unsure of what you were actually getting yourself into.

Loki on his way to kingdom 😂 as always whenever I start a new fic, let me know if you wanna see more or if I should start a diff story

Next

Tags:

@lokiprompts @mischief2sarawr @lulubelle814 @lokisgoodgirl @mochie85 @eyesbluelikethetitanic @vickie5446 @mcufan72 @fictive-sl0th @peaches1958 @xorpsbane @sailorholly @anukulee @yukio369

[beevean]

I decided to break down down this absolutely beautiful poster because I love it and there is some interesting content to notice <3

Starting from the big character portraits:

The Hecboi being his usual badass self. You can spot his earrings which I love, it's such a cute detail <3

Isaac practicing his "step on me daddy" routine. yes sir i get it your boots are fabulous and your pants can't contain your d

I find highkey underrated how Kojima associated him with skulls in official artwork. I wish it didn't get lost in time lol.

Trevor, my friend Trevor :) much more serious than the sass master he is in the game lol

Julia taking care of Hector's Innocent Devils :)

Side note, while I love most of their designs in the game, I find Kojima's idea of what Hector and Isaac's Devils could look like very fascinating. I like how she draws dragons.

The big man himself, St. Germain standing in front of a clock, and Zead holding a four-leafed clover for good luck (+ Isaac again lol)

Now, the more minute detail, going anti-clockwise:

Not only we can see Dracula's Castle, but the figure in the center is the Devil Forgery lab in the PtR manga:

Another underrated detail of lore :)

Oh, this one is just. juicy <3 It took me ages to understand what's going on, but with some help I finally realized it.

So this is essentially the moment where Hector went to Dracula and was like "hey boss, would you mind if you stopped to order me to kill humans? dunno if you noticed but i'm human too and it feels weird. thanks", and Dracula was like "hmm. let me think about it. no. have a nice day :)".

In the PtR manga, it was depicted like this:

With Dracula threatening Hector with his extended claws, and then throwing him off the castle keep. i don't know what you were expecting, man

But in the poster, he's straight up holding Hector by his throat and stabbing him with the fingers of his bat wings! So much that you can see blood dripping from his mouth! Ouch!

This only proves my headcanon that Devil Forgemasters are superhuman and can withstand wounds that would kill a normal person.

also, between this and his sippy attack in the game proper, dracula sure likes to manhandle hector a little too much.

the besties going to work <3

You have no idea how much this little drawing pisses me off. This is the closest thing I have of a canon depiction of Hector and Isaac working as Devil Forgemasters.

I need to see them slaughtering humans together in my bloodstream D: not even NFCV had the courtesy of depicting a villain Hector actually doing villain things D: guys. guys the potential-

Aside from that, this also incidentally proves that PtR's interpretation of Isaac's fabulous outfit (being what is left of his normal Devil Forgemaster outfit after Hector destroyed it) is retroactive. My man was apparently already going shirtless just because he felt like it. Imagine being killed by Dracula's most loyal soldier and your last sight in life is his tiddies. King shit.

also

yeah it's stupid but that's the vibe i get lol

I get it, Kojima-san, you love your blorbo. understandable

A bit more seriously, I really appreciate how much Isaac doesn't have the certified Kojima Pretty Man face, he's instantly recognizable. I like his big nose :)

Hector practicing Devil Forging, a smaller version of this panel from the PtR manga:

I like how in the poster it looks like a typical yin-yang symbol, but also closer to the black-and-white motif of the Devil Forging crest :) they look like two lil dragons chasing each other.

why does isaac look 150% more naked without his shoulder armor

It's hard to tell which even this is supposed to represent. I guess it's his defeat at Hector's hands, if we take the black splotches on the ground as his outfit being slashed. Notice the crest on the floor, similar to the intro of the game!

The worsties fighting. Hector is pissed and Isaac is a troll, must be a day ending in Y. they're flirting

The End! Hard to tell if it's Hector's golden Devil or Abel, but it looks awesome <3

This one... puzzles me. I can tell that Hector is being attacked by some little devils and he's defending himself. But why is he using a small pumpkin as a weapon??

(what if this is him trying to defend rosaly from the mob who accused her of being a witch :<)

Hector angsting. Sadly I'm not sure of what kind of flower that's supposed to be, perhaps a dandelion? I wish it was a lily of the valley like in PtR.

Our friend Trevor again. Interesingly, in the full poster, Isaac and Trevor are directly mirroring each other.

Trevor being like "bruh are you for real" after whipping Hector's ass black and blue. (i hate his second fight so much...)

I would say "Hector's revenge", but actually it looks like he's bleeding and in pain. So... I think this the moment when Dracula nearly clawed Trevor's eye out.

Trevor and Isaac fighting! Love that scene in the game :D

isaac how are you even twisting yourself. what are you doing. you're showing off, aren't you.

Not sure about what location these ruins are supposed to be, but fascinating detail of the skeleton holding a scale of justice. It's close to Zead...

tl;dr i want to eat this poster because it's just so fucking good and a great way to summarize the game

[halfusek]

man. batdr archives. what

i hate them

sorry im gonna go full on hater mode here because oh my god? oh my god

i’ve got a sneaking suspicion that this came out now as damage control for the AI thing because 1. it wasn’t included in the game all along like BATIM’s archives were and 2. this tweet

like was it thrown together in such a rush that they forgot a whole ass character?

or it is a joke and was a planned action half a year after the game came out but eh who knows

either way this is not what i’m here to rant about (cuz im sure this is gonna turn to a rant)

it’s about bad writing, bad exposition and bad game design. buckle up!

i see what they mean with the smile being a challenge to create, you can see in countless animations for fansongs how different artists tackled that and for one i think they did that very well

however. why the clothes exactly? is it just a meta reason with no reasoning in-universe whatsoever?

and look i’m not a fan of the ink demon having a voice (though i respect the craft behind it, the voice actor is very talented, it’s just a personal preference) BUT if you made the ink demon talk you should by logical extension either make toon bendy talk as well or explain why the hell he’s talking? i can see it being distracting but there are characters that have squeaky annoying voices in games and they’re fine (and it’s not like toon bendy is around the player for a super long time)

i dunno what logic this whole thing operates on anymore but if joey commissioned the ink machine then it should be his and arch gate got all his shit after he passed away so idk what retrieve is supposed to mean here

but it could just be badly written sentences and the archive is full of those (once again making me think that the thing was done in a rush)

that’s fair i guess

yall did make him look like a generic demon tho

i mean... it could be worse? if the goal was to make him look out of place then it was achieved but idk if it’s actually a good thing

i do like the bit about Wilson influencing how things look under him being in control of the cycle (though they have a very silly definition about what the cycle is but more about that later)

dude. the beast bendy design was already bad in BATIM and they made it even worse in BATDR like what TToTT

its just an angry mountain of muscles, the batim design at least had that leg injury thing going on which made moving with front arms make more sense, this dude right here is just a big inky gorilla (and not in a good way)

playing as the final form in on itself isnt a bad idea, does sound quite fun, personally tho i did not enjoy the very ending on the game

i dunno it just felt weird and all the other characters randomly appearing and the lost ones attacking being so awkward and ink demon acting as if they could kill you... nah man i wasn’t feeling it

okay so lets get this straight

cycle = a series of events that repeat

breaking the cycle would mean doing something different and stopping the cycle from continuing (so what... wilson was doing actually)

saying that making it restart again is what breaking it means is just??? no?

“satisfying face reveal” welp. each to their own XD

i see their purpose theme and thats neat and all but man do i hate how henry in this game is just. there and how some stranger is the person helping him get out of his horrible fate like its sooooooo unsatisfying

yeah she got more personality ill give her that

but she’s not a beacon of hope. she’s a beacon of tearing away the satisfaction of defeating a villain that we as the player worked hard towards

and uh... isn’t getting thrown into a horrible dimension full of monsters that audrey isn’t familiar with and is supposed to be freaked out about a bad moment to introduce a familiar face? like from a writing perspective, because it happens nearly instantly as chapter one starts

shouldn’t audrey be unmotivated then and struggling to figure out the world on her own? the player should also be haunted at this world, like it’s a horror game bestie ! don’t make me comfortable

well glad to hear the confirmation on that batds is happening in pararel to batdr

but his involvement in the main story is honestly such a nothing burger

is he there just so you can put batdr on the “can you pet the dog” site?

oh ok so what you’re basically putting down here is that he’s a boring perfect extremely rich guy, wasn’t even a bad father, completely stripping wilson’s arc of depth, cool, was afraid there would be something of substance powering the backbone of the plot of this game

and saying that both joey and wilson are worse people because theyre cringefail at business XDDDDDDDDDDD

ok here is something that im glad they addressed because ive been wondering about it - how audrey forgot that joey was her dad and how did she end up working at arch gate then

i suppose it implies that there’s something we might still learn/theorize about it, like for example if it was the machine drawing her in or gent wanting to get the machine back and manipulating things into place from behind the scenes

i really wonder how you can enter in and out the ink realm unnaturally but good to mention why he looks like that if he’s supposed to be nathan’s son

you cant just say that a character was important to the story, its not gonna happen from words

how is she important exactly? she just talks and uh.. helps audrey make the drink that makes you fall asleep? man that section of the game was Weird

i do want to like her, she seems nice and there could be interesting things to her backstory but as for the plot she really didn’t do much, sorry, betty

if you wanna say that pushing the plot forward by giving audrey that drink and then alice appearing outta nowhere and kidnapping here is a good big contribution then idk what to tell you... its such a bad way to make the plot progress, it was so confusing because characters were behaving as in forced to do Things to Progress the Plot (especially Audrey drinking that thing at all like seriously girl?? and Alice appearing comically at the last sip like wooooooow are you for real)

ah. so they were attempting a redemption arc

[saying this he didn’t threw aside the large rock. he was right to be holding the large rock]

this sucks man! what did joey help correct exactly? created more ink people to suffer eternally? wow, dude, thanks

also lmao what learned from his mistakes, did you HEAR his dialogue at the end of batim?? (an audrey can be heard right after that scene as well so isnt his whole change of heart supposed to be happening around here + allison has already been added to the squad)

it’s just... it’s just such bullshit man

you can make us like joey as a character but don’t you fucking dare make us like him as a person

bad. just bad

(aaaaaand this is the part that made me realize i wish the archives just. weren’t added! wow! i’m even surprised with myself with how much I Don’t Like them)

WHAT flaws??? hello??? please give it a big thinking and tell me what flaws does Audrey have im shaking and crying

also is her “deep dark past” supposed to just be like bEINg JoEY DRewS DAUghtER OOOoooOOo? lmao. wow so dark wow so deep

i dont know why this story needed a fresh pair of eyes because the story is that audrey is joeys daughter and that wilson is nathan archs son and that bendy is bendy. wow so deep so dark and complicated!!!!!!!11!!111

also whats the point of fresh eyes if you welcome us with familiar faces?

also sorry to break this to you but its not hard to stand out from the kinda cast that is presented to us in this game. sorry i cant decide if i care more about audrey or random employee number 24 with a random problem that i have 0 reason or time to get attached to. i seriously cant decide

suuuure we were so muddled xD oh you got us so good you sneaky little cheeky little quirky little

cant fucking believe we almost had a proper nathan arch jr and a secret one eyed villain that there was so much hype about and theories that they obviously tried to deliever here

its speculative but. knowing that they take inspiration from fan theories - they admitted to it and ex employees said so, i think we would have to be in some serious denial to think that @lucky-dreamfisher​‘s one-eyed bendy theory wasn’t meant to be represented here with wilson’s character

ALSO THIS NARRATIVE. THIS NARRATIVE HAS ZERO- NO, NEGATIVE AMOUNT OF COMPLEXITY

GOD

this story makes so much LESS sense based on what you said! aaaaaaaa we were so close to greatness

what is so wrong with not resetting the cycle then?

not that im a fan of how wilson was approaching things, he very clearly wanted to make himself the ruler of this realm and have power over everyone but sounds like that sure beats living under ink demons reign?

but also idk if this is entirely true like in batim chapter 5 we can see that lost ones were capable of making that lost harbour and sammy is later mentioned to have mastered a special ability too so??

i wish we learned more about the pit because it sounds quite interesting and we were working hard towards getting there and finally didnt get to see it at all (a shame! very unrewarding to the player)

im not gonna comment on reverting here cuz its a serious mental thing im not knowledgable about

i haaaate this

you... this is not how exposition is done!

show don’t tell?? how about SHOW don’t TELL??

what in the goddamn. you can’t just pull that outta your ass and say yep. this is how it is. bro. dude.

im referring here to the ink machine bit, the previous sentences can actually be seen in the story

but the design does not reflect what is written here

and they are doing so much of that in these archives, this telling of the story in a place that is not meant for telling of the story, you do that IN the STORY. rarghrgrh

surprise i found another nice thing: confirmation on that alice was the one who mutilated the butcher gang, cuz i dont think that was ever confirmed before but at least you can find implications of that in the game so its fine to outright confirm that here, good job about that

i dont know what theyre on about carley, she doesnt really look like that to me and ive looked at her model in the archives, in the files and at peoples renders of her and i just dont see it

but i guess it might mean it was like a suit that someone got stuck in- FNAF?!>!!>!?

no way. no fucking way

we got robbed what ToT

he was removed in favour of WHAT???? AMOK????

dude there ill be real. there’s barely anything that is worth keeping there instead of having him play a bigger role

and im not even that big on sammys character! hes one of my least liked characters personally even! but at least there is something more to him and just man after 5 years you could have given him more than just a dumb wilhelm scream joke, that almost feels like a spat in the face lmao

thanks for again confirming something though with that flow thing, as we noticed sammy uses gaps in the wall in batim chapter 2 to travel around the place

why not have him teach audrey the flow ability? imagine how could that would have been

im just baffled this exist but sammy apparently had to be cut out

lol

lmao

moving on

my brother in christ why are you making it a mystery if she will appear, she literally appeared in every game so far with quite major roles

also... what layers? sure in batim with her story (susie’s story) there sure been some layers, susie’s story in batim is probably aside from joey’s story the deepest character arc they got

but alice in batdr? she’s there to play a stupid game she set herself up to lose, get mad at that (eh?) shoot you and die

what layers, really

gender

but also idk i found the fight annoying and random, you could throw it out and not much of value would be lost, put sammy back in

YOU MADE HIM NOTHING

YOU TOOK A PERFECTLY FINE ENEMY AND GAVE IT ANXIETY THATS WHAT YOU DID /j /ref

idk if id describe the ink demon as putting the player on edge because he doesnt actually roam the place

you see a grey overlay on your screen and you need to hide or you die... which gets tiring fast and annoying

you totally could still have lurker (even if just restricted to some areas) as a free roaming monster

and the unlikely ally thing is just so bland like yeah he’s there, we know nothing about him aside from that he eats hearts, incredibly charming fella 

not thrilled by his design either but that issue i already had with the first trailer but i guess they just sticked with that

bendy devs not use mental illnesses as derogatory terms challenge

i like the crab boy design, he’s sillay

bro forgot a texture tho

so yeah not. happy with the archives

sorry if im like overly negative but ive honestly tried to give this sequel (because despite what they were saying it IS undoubtedly a sequel) my best assumptions and it turns out its nearly all the worst assumptions

its annoying, im annoyed

they should hire a writer to help them get this mess together, maybe get adrienne in on it, i dunno, because clearly if they need to be specific and not leaving things open like in batim, then they arent managing very well

they even fucking killed harold

[incorrect-ikevamp-quotes]

Man. How did I forget that an entire subplot of Dazai's main story was just. Trying to trap him into having a single conversation with MC like a normal person I'm so akhdjgfkljshgskjd

I just love watching her, Arthur, and Isaac deadass plot with glee to get one over on Dazai it's killing me, this is some Hamlet level shit (no Charles do not stand behind the curtain to kill Dazai coming in the window!!! yamero!!!!!)

Also because I felt personally attacked (/j) when Isaac said this:

I love you Isaac but pls have mercy on creatives we only have one brain cell and we're trying s o hard oTL

Although, and I'll leave it under the cut since I'm back on my Comte-posting, but the way Comte talks about Dazai fascinates me. Also just as fair warning, I do broach a lot of the topics that come up in Dazai rt so trigger warnings for self-harm, suicide, CPTSD and PTSD, trauma, etc. I don't go too too in-depth, but they are there.

Comte: "Dazai is quite skilled at concealing what he's really feeling, even from himself, perhaps."

The way he instantly remarks on how Dazai is not only working to conceal what he feels from others, but also from himself. Tbh I think that's enormously perceptive, because at first glance most people tend to think Dazai is lazy, troublesome, flippant, or erratic (and sometimes, a combination of all of these).

I love that he sees to the core of who Dazai is and what he's feeling; fear. Dazai is afraid of hurting someone again, but I also think on some level he's made it an ontological problem; he's afraid of himself. He thinks his very existence is a negative entity, something that exists only to hurt and/or estrange other people, something wrong/different. I'd argue that's why he's so adamant about mood-making and keeping to himself. If you never express how you truly feel or live true to yourself, on some level you can't entirely reach others. Because fundamentally, being close to other people does require some level of lowered defenses and sharing. Ergo, never dwell too long or give too much of yourself away, never make a mark on anyone--good or bad.

As a side note, Theo calls him "a half-strewn dandelion puff" and I agree that's rather blunt, but on some level Theo operates on a level of utility. His entire operating precept is that life and work must serve a discrete purpose. And Dazai, in choosing to opt out of living with meaning/intent out of fear, makes this description entirely consistent with Theo's perspective of the world. Though his phrasing is harsh and perhaps one-dimensional, I do find it interesting that he comes to a similar conclusion as Comte as to what Dazai is doing.

Comte talks about it with such clarity and calm, he really does feel so parental in this moment. He's not necessarily minimizing the reality of how Dazai is experiencing the world, but he also clearly doesn't agree with Dazai's self-perception. Perhaps most striking to me is how Comte seems to understand that the only threat Dazai poses is to himself...Sometimes it feels like, in the case of conditions like mental illness/depression/etc. people are so eager to assume ill will of a person. This is only exponentially compounded if they prove to have striking intelligence and strategic capacity, the same way Dazai does. I guess I can't help but appreciate that Comte knows the difference between strong and scared, and even how the lines between the two can and often do blur (perhaps best exemplified in his relationships with Jeanne and Dazai).

(Side note: I forgot which event it was but, one time when Dazai was homesick for cherry blossom watching, Comte had the entire house filled with flowers to cheer him up [insert ugly sobbing]).

For someone so enigmatic, evasive, and distant, Comte still notices instantly that Dazai is much, much happier with MC. I suppose it makes me wonder if Comte knew all along that Dazai's real wish was to be accepted and loved as he was, but kept quiet out of respect for his privacy. I would offer too that sometimes people need to realize these things on their own for the information to have value.

But what really gets my ass is what Comte says right after:

This is my bread and butter (so is he but that's not the point of this particular TED talk). In the last few years I've done a lot of exploratory work on how trauma is mapped both internally but also visibly on the body. What I think is engaging here is that, while it could be read on a surface level as "body language gives people's true intentions away" I don't think that's quite what he's getting at. Or perhaps better phrased, it's an oversimplification. I don't think it's that body language can't communicate real and important information about people's lives. Rather, that people associate rigid and absolutist interpretations to singular mannerisms, which does a disservice to both parties. Nobody can know a person at a glance; to say that you do reduces the lived reality of the opposite party.

Comte gives simple examples and couches his words for the context of the moment, but I think that first line is incredibly telling. "But the body is remarkably truthful." It makes me think of how, in moments where Comte is overcome with anxiety as a result of traumatic recurrence, he has acute panic attacks (i.e. shortened breath, racing heart, trembling). How Leonardo's lethargy (i.e. napping on the floor everywhere like the hobo he is) belies the reality of his very real exhaustion, the emotional turmoil that comes with a fraught immortal life.

Dazai's endless struggle with dissociation and self-harm, the way he stood in the rain unmoving at the thought of MC returning home to the modern era. Whether to numb himself from the pain of that grief/loneliness, or perhaps more likely the self-immolation of subjecting himself to the re-enactment of the most harrowing moment of his life. To relive that anguish as a reminder; to abstain from making the same mistake ever again. Jeanne's endless bodily tension, struggles with basic self-care (appears to be interoception-based; reduced signalling of the need to eat/rest/etc.), and self-isolation to cope in a world where only the strong survive. Never safe, always alone, always defensive.

I think, for many people in general but especially people who have been through intense PTSD/CPTSD/etc., it can be hard to express these feelings directly. Whether they are forcibly silenced, ridiculed into self-derision/self-concealment, or are overwhelmed by emotions that are difficult to process--each manifests itself in unconventional ways. It means a lot to me when those phenomena are portrayed so sensitively in written works/media, that they're explored with real intention and narrative subtlety to communicate how hard it is for people who are wounded or simply different (or both, as often is the case).

Addendum:

Even more than that, and this is an observation at the end of Dazai's route, is Comte's open belief that life is something to be cherished. Of course, like any other person he has behaviors he won't abide and people he doesn't feel partial to, but by and large he doesn't take life lightly. Perhaps that's why he doesn't expect Dazai to resort to such measures again, in conjunction with the circumstances of his transition. From an outsider perspective, I could see how Comte might assume Dazai no longer wishes for that if he seemed to regret his initial course of action by seeking resurrection. There is also the implication that Dazai is always at war with himself, and therefore might give contradictory impressions; one moment he wants to live, the next he doesn't. This is precisely what led him to ask Charles for help to subdue his own 'cowardice.' (His terms, not mine. [bonks him]) There is a sizeable subset of s-word survivors who, after recovery, feel that their problems were actually solvable despite their despair in the moment.

Of course, that doesn't apply to everyone, but I think there's something to be said of Comte feeling such real affection for the mansion boys that he is stricken to find out what Dazai attempted. And perhaps unsurprisingly, very adamant to keep him from ever pursuing such a course of action again. He's incredibly vulnerable about his horror that he might have inflicted something on Dazai that he never wanted in bringing him back, though Dazai comfortably refutes any lack of agency in the situation.

I guess I feel very compelled by the duality inherent in Comte's glass heart, precisely because of how realistic it feels. His greatest strength is his sensitivity, but it's also his greatest weakness in tandem. His genuine care for Dazai--the unwavering belief that his life is valuable and worthy--ends up being the reason he doesn't anticipate Dazai's rather deeply entrenched self-loathing. And to be honest, I'm a bit inclined to agree; looking back on a third reading Dazai feels way too hard on himself. It feels like the young girl's death was more a catalyst for what Dazai was already feeling, than anything. Dazai wanted so badly to have a reason to despise himself (as he already disliked how different and out of place he naturally felt) and with this, his self-reproach could have a viable, rational explanation. A locus outside of his body by which to rationalize his self-hatred. Accident or not becomes irrelevant; he was involved, and thus he is guilty.

He reminds me a lot of that post that was circulating once about how cultish behavior inculcates intelligent people with more devastating pull than one might expect, because intelligent people can more easily and more insistently find ways to desperately rationalize their situation to function in that whirlpool of abuse. Dazai feels like he's in this same such Catch-22, so busy believing he deserves to be scorned (because of how well he hides his perceived abnormalities) that he takes steps to ensure and reinforce it. He wants and needs to see his reality make sense, and if it won't answer his designs he will find a way to make it so.

It fascinates me because Dazai is an incredibly complex example of someone who desires control, but instead of inflicting it with external rapacity, he targets his own internal state. I once heard a Buddhist explain: yes, it is a sign of disturbance to engage with others aggressively and without grace. However, it is also a sign of disturbance when the mind seeks to harm one's own body. Although Dazai's disturbance is not as apparent, it is there. And that's part of what makes him so excruciatingly compelling to me, in a lot of ways he is the manifestation of the Sisyphean suffering of being ill in a quiet way. In enduring and smiling and laughing because you don't want to burden others--or know you're not allowed to--all while you slowly bleed from the inside out.

[kittyt-hexxed]

Hiiii! I’ve been hesitant to ask because I’m not sure if you’re in this fandom, but could you do a fic for Suki from ATLA? Definitely older cause she’s like sixteen in the series, but one where Reader is Katara/Sokka’s older sister and she instantly falls for Suki. (Reader has a thing for women who can knock her out) Have her be a secret water bender (ya know, cause Katara) and like Suki catches her bending. Reader begs her not to tell and Suki is like “only if you let me train you.”

Maybe a smut scene after practice, it’s totally up to you! But I would love it if you wrote this, I love your Arcane work! Oh! And Reader has loooong curly hair like past her butt! Thank you!

Can You Keep a Secret?

Suki x Fem!POC!Reader

Author Note: You don’t understand the excitement I felt seeing an ATLA request! Writing this helped my writer’s block, too, so thank you for that! I am in both fandoms ATLA and TLOK! I have also read the Kyoshi novels for future reference ;)

Warnings: ATLA Spoilers (Season 1, Episode 4), Young & Dumb Sokka, Older Suki, Waterbender!Reader, Accidental flashing, Cute Flirting, Teasing, Playful Training, Suki kicks your ass and you’re into it, First Time, Hickeys, Fingering, Praise/Compliments

Summary: You tried your best to hide your bending, but Suki managed to find out within a few hours. You beg her to keep the secret and she agrees… only if you let her train you.

Your head was spinning from the events that happened within the last few days. Not only did your little sister find the Avatar, but you nearly got a face full of fire! It didn’t help that you were hiding your bending ability. You wanted to drown that stupid kid for attacking your family. He was lucky that Aang came in when he did, or you would have sunk him under the ice. Then there was the heartbreaking revelation at the Air Temple… so, it’s actually relieving to you that Aang wanted to go on a little break. You were also really enjoying traveling by Bison. You really enjoyed feeling the wind in your hair. It also helped that if you found the right spot, you couldn’t hear them talking over the loudness of the wind. It was your favorite place to take a nap until you shifted over.

“Stop bugging her, airhead.” This is the first thing you hear as you tune back into the conversation, causing you to open your eyes, “You need to give girls space when they’re doing their sewing.” You raise an eyebrow at that. ‘Where did he get that from?’

“What does me being a girl have to do with sewing?” Katara asks.

“Yeah, little bro.” Sokka jolts as he realizes you’re awake and listening, “What does being a girl have to do with that?” He’s silent for a moment as he tries to figure out the words to say.

“Simple. Girls are better at fixing pants than guys, and guys are better at hunting and fighting and stuff like that.” He shrugs, “It’s just the natural order of things.” Your eyes feel like they’re going to pop out of their head as you look at your brother in disbelief.

“Really?” You say coldly, “I guess I should stop hunting then since I’m so horrible at it.”

“I’m all done with your pants and look what a great job I did!” Katara says too sweetly, tossing his pants at him. They hit him in the face and he panics, realizing that there’s still a hole in them. He looks to you for help, but you close your eyes and pretend to go back to sleep. What he said concerned you. Where did he get those ideas from when you were the main caretaker of the family? You hunted, gathered firewood, and took care of everyone. That’s why you were so reluctant to leave in the first place. Your people needed you, but Gran Gran was persuasive.

By the time you landed, you wanted nothing to do with the group. Sokka and Katara had been bickering nearly the whole time while Aang kept trying to get your sister’s attention. You found it funny at first, watching this kid try to impress your sister while not knowing how to interact with her. You were silently cheering him on but it was painful.

“I’m going to go over there. Spirits know I need a moment to myself.” You point off to the side where there is a bit more of a private area, “Don’t do anything stupid.” You pointedly look at Sokka.

“Why are you looking at me?!” Sokka protests, “You should be saying that to Katara! She’s already done stupid things!”

“Oh, really?” Katara scoffs, “Like what?” You watch them bicker for a moment before shaking your head. ‘They wonder why I’m always hunting.’

“Don’t you want to see the Elephant Koi?” Aang asks you.

“No, I’m good. I’ll check them out later since we’re camping here.” You give him a reassuring smile. You glance at the two behind him who are still arguing and roll your eyes. There wasn’t a moment where your siblings weren’t at each other’s throats. It got tiring trying to be the mediator so you stopped. You just let them hash it out. You walk away from the group, looking forward to getting a little bit of alone time.

Now in a private place, you pull off your coat and strip down to your undergarments. You would have invited Katara along but between Aang wanting to impress her and your social flame going low, you chose against it. ‘Some peace.’ You smile to yourself. You find a place to sit in the sand and get comfortable. The sand was warm, already heated up from the sun, and felt wonderful on your skin. You sigh in contentment, laying back to enjoy the area's warmth. If you were back home, you would’ve been bundled up to avoid the cold. It didn’t bother you much, but it got frustrating sometimes. Having a chance to show some skin and not have the possibility of freezing to death is wonderful. You were excited to travel the world, even if you’d miss Gran Gran back at home.

You were probably lying down for a total of five minutes before you heard screaming. Your eyes snap open and you jump up from the sand. You’re sprinting back to the group before your mind can even process it. You gasp in shock seeing a giant sea serpent chasing Aang across the water. Your fingers flex, itching to jump into the water and help him as you get to the bank with your siblings. It wasn’t necessary though as Aang comes flying out of the water and collides with Sokka. You flinch as they get thrown back into the trees.

“Sokka! Aang!” You shout, running to them with Katara. You give Sokka a concerned look seeing him slumped against a tree while Aang looked fine.

“What was that thing?” Katara questions.

“I don’t know.” Aang responds, putting his clothes on.

“It might have been a sea serpent of some kind.” You put a hand on your hip, “Dad used to warn me that some hung out in the water near the ice floes. That’s why we didn’t go there for my initiation.” They all look at you as if they just realized you were there before shouting and turning around. You blink in confusion.

“Y-Y-Y/N!” Katara shouts, her face an impressive shade of pink, “Where are your clothes?!”

“I heard screaming. There wasn’t time to put clothes on if something was wrong.” You deadpan, crossing your arms over your chest, “I’ll go get them now that I know you’re all okay.”

“Great! Then we can leave!” Sokka says, not turning back, “I am not sticking around to find out what that creature actually is.”

“Yeah, yeah.” You wave him off, turning around and heading back to where you left your clothes, “I’ll help you get ready to go once I’m dressed.” You leave them by the trees. ‘There is a lot Katara and Sokka haven’t been exposed to.’ You frown. ‘Our age differences have affected them a lot more than I would have liked. I was thirteen when we lost mom. I had more than enough time with her to learn about waterbending or go adventuring with Dad. They’ve been sheltered for far too long.’

You find the area where you left your clothes and pull your tights back on. You exhale, sad that your moment of peace has gone just as fast as it arrived. You bend down to put up your tunic, straightening up to dust the sand off and the next thing you know a figure drops down in front of you. Your feet are swept out from under you before you can react, and the person grabs you by your chest wrappings as you fall. You’re yanked forward by them, but you feel them come undone as they’re not as secure as they should have been. The gang's haste to get into the air the other day didn’t give you the time you needed to do a warrior wrap. The person in front of you gasps as the wraps fall away, suddenly spinning you around and blinding you. You let out a yelp as your chest is exposed to the air, but your tunic is on shortly after. Ropes are tied around your upper body, pinning your arms to your sides. They pick up your body, drape you over their shoulder, and start running. ‘That happened way too fast.’ You think, dazed. That couldn’t have been more than a minute. You don’t even have the words to say, honestly. You were surprised. Very surprised. Who could move like that?! The only time you moved that fast was while ice skating! Were there people who could move that fast normally? Aang didn’t count because he’s the Avatar. Who knows the extent of his abilities.

You weren’t sure how long it took, but your body was tied to something after a while. From the sounds of it, the others were right next to you so at least you don’t have to worry about that. You shift your body, trying to figure out how exactly you’re tied up. You practically jump out of your skin when you hear someone talking.

“You four have some explaining to do.” A man’s voice sounds.

“And if you don’t answer all of our questions, we’re throwing you back into the water with the Unagi.” A woman says after him.

“Show yourselves, cowards!” Comes from your idiot brother somewhere to your left.

“Oh sure, Sokka. Call the people who tied us up” the blindfold is removed from your eyes, “cowards.” You hiss, then go silent as you see a group of girls standing in front of you. The man you heard was with him, but he was the only one.

“Who are you? Where are the men who ambushed us?” Sokka demands.

“There were no men.” The woman in front scoffs, seemingly irritated by that question, “We ambushed you. Now tell us - who are you, and what are you doing here?”

“We-” You try to speak but Sokka speaks over you.

“Wait a second, there’s no way a bunch of girls took us down.” You can hear the amusement in his voice and it makes you want to smack him. How many times do you have to yell at him for him to understand that it’s not just the men in your tribe who do things? Besides, the woman was clearly agitated, and saying that would only make it worse.

“Sokka, you’ve got to be kidding me.” You sigh.

“Bunch of girls, huh?” The woman grabs Sokka by his coat and leans in threateningly, “The unagi is going to eat well tonight.”

“Please ignore my dumbass brother!” You shout, getting her attention, “He does NOT speak for the rest of us!” You glare at him.

“Then, I’m sure you can answer my questions. Since you seem to be the oldest here.” She stands in front of you and you meet her dark blue eyes, “Who are you? What are you doing here?” Her voice was lowered and it was spoken in more of a threatening manner than before.

“We’re from the Southern Water Tribe. We were just passing through and wanted to relax before continuing.” You swallow, feeling intimidated, “That’s all, I promise.”

“It’s my fault.” Aang speaks up, from somewhere past your brother, “I’m sorry we came here. I wanted to ride the Elephant Koi.”

“How do we know you’re not Fire Nation spies?” The man hisses accusingly, “Kiyoshi stayed out of the war so far and we intend to keep it that way.” That makes you scoff in anger. How dare he accuse you of being a spy for that wretched nation! As if you’d want anything to do with the people who destroyed your family!

“This island is named for Kiyoshi?” Aang sounds oddly happy about that, “I know Kiyoshi!”

“How could you possibly know her? Avatar Kiyoshi was born here four hundred years ago. She’s been dead for centuries!”

“I know her because I’m the Avatar.” Aang says making your jaw drop. ‘He did not just say that out loud! Why would he tell people that after I told him to keep it a secret?!’ You panic. ‘If these idiots would have let me handle this, I could have gotten us out by now! But, no, don’t let the adult handle this!’

“That’s impossible! The last Avatar was an airbender who disappeared one hundred years ago.” The woman shakes her head as you drop yours in exasperation.

“That’s me!” You can practically hear Aang’s grin. You were going to strangle this kid the moment your hands were free. Avatar or not!

“Throw the impostor to the unagi!” The man commands. ‘So, he’s likely the chief.’ The women snap out metal fans and move closer to surround your group. Your eyes widen and you internally curse that your hands are bound. There was nothing you could do to help your situation.

“Aang, if you’re going to claim that you’re the Avatar you need to prove it!” You tell him, not liking the sight of those fans, “Do some air bending!” There’s a gust of air and you hear the people gasping in awe. Whispers fill the air as Aang floats down and you feel relieved as you hear the Chief say that he believed him. They threw a feast in honor of Aang’s arrival and you were shocked to see so much food on the table. You were hesitant at first, but Aang insisted so you ate until you were satisfied. The Chief and the leader of the Kyoshi Warriors joined your group. Thankfully, Sokka was too engrossed in stuffing himself with food to notice the warrior sitting with you. If he had, you were sure dinner wouldn’t have been as pleasant as it was.

“Hello.” The woman greets you as she takes the seat to your left.

“Hello.” You greet her politely.

“I wanted to apologize and introduce myself to you.” She brushes her hair behind her ear, “I’m Suki, the leader of the Kyoshi Warriors. I’m sorry we ambushed you like that. While we live away from the mainlands, people have been begging us to join the war. It’s been going on since before I was a little girl. We’ve been very careful with newcomers.”

“That’s alright. I understand that. My village was raided by the Fire Nation when I was a teenager. After that, the men in the village refused to let anyone who wasn’t from the neighboring villages in.” You reassure her, “You were only protecting your home. I can’t blame you for that when I would do the same. It’s admirable.”

“That’s a relief. Thank you… but um… that’s not all I wanted to apologize for.” Suki rubs the back of her neck, lowering her voice, “I was the one who jumped you on the shoreline. You looked to be around my age, so I wasn’t sure what training you might have had.” Her words sink in and you begin to feel mortified.

“I saw your chest and I wanted to let you know that wasn’t my intention.” She whispers, and you think you see her face turning pink, “I’m very sorry for that.”

“I-It’s okay.” You frantically wave your hands, “I’m not upset about it at all. At least you had the decency to cover me.”

“O-Of course! I wouldn’t do that to another woman!” Now she’s waving her hands frantically, “Not unless they wanted me to, but that’s not- I’m going to stop talking now.” She facepalms, making you laugh at the absurdity of the conversation.

The mess that was your first conversation didn’t do anything to ruin the rest of them. You found yourself talking to Suki the most as you were sitting next to each other. She listened intently as you talked about your life at home and what you did for fun. Unfortunately, you had to leave out anything that involved waterbending. Katara was the one who talked to Suki about that one. But, you learned about Suki’s life on the island and how it was her dream to become a Kyoshi Warrior. You congratulated her on becoming the leader and she made a soft comment that had you raising an eyebrow, “It’s rewarding to train pretty women like you.”

You weren’t new to flirting. You were lucky enough to interact with people outside of your tribe before your dad left. It’s just been a while since you’ve had a chance. So, you fell into it. You flirted with her, and she seemed to be into it. You couldn’t believe your luck. You’ve been gone from home for such a short time and here was an attractive woman hitting on you! The end of dinner made you a little sad, but you had the itch for some more alone time, so you asked one of the islanders where you could find a quiet cove or something close to it. They directed you to one on the other side of the island that’s past the training building for the Kyoshi Warriors.

It was a good distance to walk, but that meant you wouldn’t be bothered by anyone either. With your siblings and Aang preoccupied, you took the chance to sneak away. It felt like the perfect opportunity to get some waterbending practice in. You let out a slow breath, moving through the meditative poses your mother taught you as a child. It helped not only to relax your body but your mind when it got too unfocused. And, it was definitely too unfocused. There was something about Suki that got into your brain. You couldn’t stop thinking about her. Knowing that she was the one who took you down earlier made you flustered. You’ve never come into contact with anyone who can do something like that.

So, once your body is focused, you let your awareness spread to the rolling waves in front of you. You smile to yourself as you lift the water and bring it towards you. It whirls around your body, the soft whooshing sound of the water bringing you peace of mind.

“Okay, mom.” You exhale, widening your stance slightly, “Guide me through the exercise.” You move through the waterbending techniques your mother taught you, steadily going faster and getting harsher with each re-run of the sequence. Your muscles are used to the movement, due to training over and over again. At some point, you’d have to break the news to Katara. She’d be pissed with you for keeping this a secret, but she wasn’t ready. You couldn’t teach her something that could kill someone if she couldn’t control her anger. You will never forget the day you nearly speared your father with an icicle during an argument.

“You didn’t tell me you were a bender.” A voice comes from behind you, making you shriek. You whirl around, the water following as you whip it at whoever snuck up on you.

“Ouch!” The person yelps, clutching their side and you realize that it’s Suki.

“Oh, Spirits! I’m so sorry!” You gasp as she looks at you with an impressed look, “Are you okay?!”

“It’s okay!” Suki giggles, rubbing her side as she moves closer to you, “I guess we’re even after what happened earlier today.”

“I guess we are.” You chuckle, “Are you sure you don’t want me to check?”

“Well… I’d have to remove everything so…”

“Oh.” You blink, “Then, I’ll take your word for it.”

“Anyway, that was some impressive bending. How come you didn’t bring it up when Katara was talking about it?”

“My brother and sister don’t know. Our mom trained me in secret in case my siblings couldn’t bend. I haven’t told Katara for various reasons.” You sigh, running a hand over your hair. It was the one conversation you were dreading.

“Hmm, is the reason because you’re so good at it?” She says flirtatiously, “If you had fought me with it this morning, I might have been the one retrained.”

“I doubt it.” You flirt back, “I could just freeze you in place.” You demonstrate by sneakily freezing her feet to the ground. She gasps, tugging on her ankles to try and get them unstuck.

“Then you wouldn’t have been able to go anywhere.” You giggle, giving her a playful shove. Suki laughs as she pinwheels, unable to fall.

“You’re interesting, you know that?” She grins, watching as you melt the ice and pull the water back to you.

“Says the woman who took me down in seconds.” You chuckle, “I have never been so confused in my life.” She could take you down that fast and had the strength to lift your body. You found that kind of attractive.

“Will you show me your bending?” Suki questions, leaning forward on her tiptoes, “I haven’t seen waterbending like yours up close before.”

“Only if you keep it a secret.” You get a raised eyebrow in return, “Please, Suki. I can’t have them finding out right now.” You give her a pleading look. She makes a face like she’s contemplating what you said. You bite your lip, wondering if she’d tell them about your secret. She didn’t seem like that kind of person, but you only just met her. She tied you up and planned on murdering you without a second thought, too. It was to protect her people but…

“I’ll keep it a secret.” Suki agrees, a teasing smile on her lips, “But, you have to let me train you. You’ll need to know how to protect yourself.”

“Deal!” You hurriedly agree. That earns you a big grin from Suki and you spend the last of your daylight waterbending for her. She seemed dazzled by what you were doing. She asked you questions and even attempted to do the moves with you. For the first time in forever, you didn’t feel alone while practicing. She made you laugh and even tried to surprise attack you! You managed to hit her away, but you suspected she made it easy for you.

Once the final dredges of sunlight were about to disappear, Suki took your hand and guided you through the woods. She said you could use the actual training building because you’d be the only ones there. With the arrival of Aang, she had given the others the evening off. But, it will be right back to work tomorrow morning.

“This is where you practice?” You gasp. The building was very simple on the inside with a large open space. There were some weapons hanging on the wall and two doors at the back of the building.

“Yup. From sunrise to sunset.” Suki turns to you, putting her hands on her hips, “Now you’ll get the chance to see how we train.”

“So, why did you want to train me?” You question, letting her pull your hair out of its ponytail. You shake it out and blush at the awed look Suki gives you. Your hair was very long. You took great care of it since there wasn’t much to do in your free time.

“If you’re going to keep pretending you’re not a waterbender, you still need to be able to protect yourself.” She retrieves a box and has you kneel before her, “So, I’m going to walk you through our traditions.”

Suki takes the time to get you dressed into the robes the Kiyoshi Warriors wear. You’re almost surprised at how heavy the robes are on your body. If they wore this and managed to move that quickly, they must be inhuman or something! It interested you, and you found the way Suki talked so proudly about it to be cute. You listened to her closely, letting her put the makeup on you as she explained the history behind it. Once that was done, it was time for practice.

“We’re going to move through some motions, so spread your feet apart like this and bring your elbows into your body.” Suki demonstrates. You mimic her and she stares at you intensely as you do. A few seconds pass before she walks over to you.

“You want to come down a bit farther.” She puts her hands on your hips and pulls your body down some more. You feel your breath catch in your throat as she manipulates your body. Although you had no skin exposed, you could feel her touch lingering on your skin. It felt like the air was heating up between you two. She watched your body movements, using her own hands to support you or correct your form. You stopped breathing when her hands moved up your body, feeling dizzy in a different way. Your gazes lingered, and you watched her lips move as she talked.

“You’re doing a great job!” Suki compliments you, “You’re a natural at this!”

“Thank you.” You feel fluttery hearing her say that, “It might just be because I have a great teacher.”

“A great teacher is only made by a great student.” She winks at you, making you giggle.

“Can you show me your moves in action?” You tilt your head, “Slowly, at least. I’d like to be able to see it this time.”

“Okay, get in position across from me.” Suki motions with her hand, and you do as she says. You lock eyes, getting lost in her gaze. A moment passes and then Suki becomes a blur. You gasp in alarm, feeling her grab your arm out of nowhere. You’re yanked forward and you feel your body flip through the air. You let out a grunt of pain as your back hits the floor and Suki pins you to the ground. Your jaw drops as she smirks down at you.

“Was that slow enough?” She asks teasingly.

“Yeah…” You breathe out, feeling an unknown emotion settle in your chest.

“That’s it for tonight, then.” The smirk doesn’t leave her face as she helps you up, “Let’s get you out of that. We’ll take the makeup off first.” You nod wordlessly, still in awe. The two of you head into the changing room where the shelves are filled with extra uniforms. There’s a basin of water there that’s used to remove the makeup, but you feel a little spontaneous.

“Let me remove the makeup for you.” You pull water from the basin and let it stick to your palms, “It’ll be faster this way.”

“Okay.” Suki smiles and sits down, patting the spot on the bench next to her. You get close to her, Suki’s hand on your thigh to steady herself as she lets you carefully run your hands over her face. Little by little, the makeup comes off to reveal her features and you’re taken by her beauty.

“You’re staring.” She whispers.

“Sorry.” You go to back away, but she grabs your wrist.

“I’m okay with staring… but I’d prefer to kiss you instead.” You make a noise in the back of your throat, surprised by her statement.

“If I read this whole evening wrong, you’re more than welcome to tell me no.” She continues, “But if I haven’t… I’d like to kiss you.”

“You haven’t.” You whisper, closing your eyes to remove the makeup from your face. Once you do, you send the water down the little drain next to the basin, “I’d like to kiss you, too.”

Suki didn’t waste a second. Her lips were on yours, soft and sweet from the berry juice in the lip paint. Your heartbeat picks up as she guides you onto her lap, and you rest your hands on her chest. She wasn’t your first kiss, but she’s the first kiss where it was good. Suki knew how to kiss and it showed. The way her tongue found its way into your mouth, not too much to send you running or she’d take a moment to suck on your bottom lip and make you impatient.

“Can I touch you?” Suki asks sweetly, “Have you been touched before?”

“Ah, no, I-I haven’t.” That question wasn’t one you were expecting at all. That made you a little nervous. You haven’t even touched yourself before. How would you know what to do or-

“Hey, don’t worry. We don’t have to do anything.” She brushes your hair behind your ear, “I was just asking.”

“I’d like to… I’ve just- I don’t-”

“You don’t need to do anything.” She giggles, “Let me do it for you.”

“Okay.” You agree.

“Let’s get you undressed then.” Suki waits for you to stand before instructing you to turn around. Piece by piece, she helped you out of the warrior’s uniform while leaving kisses on your neck. Your body felt warm, your heart was racing, and you were slowly getting excited for what was to come. When your robes were off, you helped Suki even though she didn’t need it. Taking your cues from her, you did the same thing and kissed her neck, giving in to the urge to leave little bites as well. You were doing something right by the way you’d hear soft gasps leave her lips. The moment the last piece of her robes were off, she backed you into the wall and hicked your leg up to her hip.

“Kiss me.” You demand, making her chuckle.

“Eager.” She grins before kissing you again. This time you were more intense with this kiss. You weren’t sure why but only that it felt right to be. You could feel her fingers playing at the edge of your underwear and it sends shivers up your spine. Her fingers move across and down, over your covered clit to press against that spot between your legs. You gasp against her lips, wrapping your arms around her to bring her closer to you. She rubs her fingers down there for a bit, continuing to kiss you as you struggle to hold in your moans. Your body is trembling at this point, eager for more stimulation from the gorgeous warrior pinning you to the wall.

“Do you still want me to put my fingers in?” Suki asks after backing from the kiss.

“Yes…” You breathe out. You hold each other’s gaze as you feel her move the cloth aside. Her eyes sparkle in the light, such a deep blue you could always get lost in them. You gasp as one of her fingers slips into you, whimpering as she touches you in a way no one has. It’s all you can focus on. The feel of her touching you so deeply in a place that sent your body tingling with pleasure.

“Suki.” You moan out her name, tilting your head back.

“You’re so beautiful, you know.” She kisses your exposed neck, “It’s a shame you’ve never felt pleasure like this before.”

“You’re the first.” You mutter, not able to speak any louder.

“I’m honored.” She hums, putting another finger in and stretching you out, “You have such a cute pussy. I’m enjoying letting you experience this.” You groan, the soft burning from the stretching not doing anything to distract you from the pleasure. Only a few hours ago, she had tied you up and now she was in an intimate position with you. Who would have thought leaving home would end up with you like this?

“Thank you…” You say breathily, “It feels nice. Really nice.”

“Don’t thank me yet, cutie.” Suki giggles, “I haven’t made you cum, yet.” You weren’t sure what she meant by that, but you couldn’t ask. She had moved her thumb to a bundle of nerves further up and you were too enthralled to talk. The trembling in your body only got worse, except now something was tightening in your abdomen. It kept getting tighter the more she touched you and you didn’t want to tell Suki to stop. You were more aware of her fingers than you were earlier and the pressure in your abdomen had reached its peak. A loud moan left your lips as you felt it snap, your fingers digging into her shoulders in the process.

“Spirits!” You hear Suki exclaim in surprise and then giggle as you feel a liquid run down your legs. She didn’t stop until you could feel your body relax, but your mind was definitely in a different state. You felt a little foggy.

“I didn’t think I’d make you cum that hard.” Suki chuckles, slowly sliding her fingers out, “Are you feeling okay?” She asks.

“Yeah.” You nod, trying to catch your breath, “I am. I just- I’m not quite sure what I’m feeling but it feels good.”

“Don’t worry, it’ll go away soon.” She kisses your cheek, “You did great, cutie.”

“Thank you.” You blush, thinking about kissing her again, “Can I…?”

“Can you kiss me again?” She smirks, making you giggle and nod your head.

“I don’t mind that.” Suki lifts your chin and kisses you.

[hyperfixation-train-station]

Chapter 2

✧ Word Count: 2545 words

✧ Author’s Note: Just finished this chapter today, I will me writing a lot more tomorrow so chapter should be coming out a bit quicker in the future.

✧ Summary: This is Eric's POV of what happened in Chapter one, plus the aftermath of what is to come after Wyn sees thew doctors at the infirmary, lets just say that Max has a plan that Eric isn't too thrilled about and Four thinks is hilarious.

✧ Warnings: foul language

✧ Tag List: @mischief-merlyn

Being in leadership at such a young age should be an honour, and it is, but right now more than anything I would rather jump into the chasm than being the leader that has to deal with more initiates. I swear they get worse every single year, we get people that think all Dauntless do is jump off shit and get tattoos, which I mean we do, but there is a lot more to it than that.

I look down at my watch and sigh, the train should be here soon. I wonder how many people will not jump off the train and need to be rounded up later this year. I mean honestly I don’t know what they expect us to do when they don’t jump off the train, every faction knows that the trains don’t stop, not that we would ever stop the trains for cowards that are too scared to jump off anyway. I guess it just makes the initiation process easier as it gets rid of the weak cowards early on. I start to feel the rumble of the train and I look up to see the first train car reach the roof. I watch a sea of black jump out of the first car, ah yes the Dauntless borns, and… wait is that white I see jumping out of the first car as well? Well i’ll be damned, a new initiate from Candour made it into the first car with the Dauntless borns

“That’s a rare sight, a Candour made it to the front of the train with the Dauntless born” Max, the leader of leaders in Dauntless, says

“Don’t get too impressed Max, initiates always have a way to let us down after doing something mildly Dauntless like” I mutter, Max just chuckles and rolls his eyes at me.

“You’re no fun, have at least a little faith in them” he says, I scoff, to which he just laughs at again.

My eyes begin to drift over the crowd, I don’t really know what I am looking for, my eyes seem to have a mind of their own and who am I to stop them from finding whatever they are looking for. Then I see her and immediately know that she was what I was looking for, the same brown doe eyes that I saw a little over a year ago now, those eyes were seared in my memory that night I found her. I never thought I would see the little Candour girl I saved from her own faction again. It was all luck that I even stumbled upon her and the group of Candour boys attacking her in the first place. It was one of my first patrols after initiation, I had turned down the wrong alley and gotten lost when I saw her. She had made eye contact with me before the boys even knew I was there. Although she never said anything I could see her eyes begging me to save her and well apparently I can’t say no to brown doe eyes. I mean sure I would’ve done something either way because those boys were disgusting, taking pleasure in attacking someone so much smaller than them, but I had never felt such a primal rage in my life before seeing her eyes plead for help. For a second I wonder if she recognizes me, but all the confirmation I need to know that she does is looking into her pretty brown eyes. I can almost see the anxiety building up inside her when she looks away and wraps her arms around herself for comfort, but instead of letting it take over, I watch as she forces her arms to hang by her side and keep eye contact with me. The sight makes me fill with pride, it seems the little deer has found her confidence. I suppress a grin, well maybe this initiation class just got a lot more interesting

“I’ll leave the introduction to you” Max says, breaking my train of thought. I sigh and mutter ‘lazy fuck’ under my breath to which Max simply grins at.

"All right, listen up!" I yell, instantly silencing the crowd,

"I'm Eric. I'm one of your leaders. If you want to enter Dauntless, this is the way in." I motion off the ledge I am standing on. I feel a wave of unease and confusion run through the initiates and it makes me grin, this is one of my favourite parts, scaring the shit out of the initiates. I find myself looking to see the reaction of what I said on the little deers face, but she has a look of indifference, almost like she is thinking about how inefficient this entrance would be to use everyday. The thought is amusing to me, I look at the rest of the crowd and continue. 

"And if you don't have the guts to jump..." I pause, looking around the crowd once again "then you don't belong in Dauntless."

"Is there water at the bottom, or something?" a loud mouth Candour boy asks. I scoff, but I also catch a slight scoff from the little deer… I’ve got to stop calling her that and figure out her name. She must also hate the fact that her birth faction does not have the ability to shut up for longer than 30 minutes. 

"I guess you'll find out." I say while I give the boy a once over "Or not." I shrug. I hear a small chuckle and my eyes dart to the noise, of course it is her, the little deer.  

“Well who wants to go first” I say crossing my arms, I am starting to get bored of this process already. I think that is a new record. I wait for someone to volunteer.

“Me” Little deer says and she starts to walk over to the edge where I am standing. She steps up onto the ledge, I have to stop myself from offering her my hand to help her up, what is wrong with me? I never have feelings like this, let alone about an initiate. She makes eye contact with me now that she is beside me on the ledge, then she looks down at the hole in the roof. I see her about to step off the ledge when I am hit by a streak of blue, which sends me into my little deer and now we are both falling off the ledge.  All I hear as the two of us fall is an unfamiliar voice yell

“Wait no I want to go first” and Max yell,

“What the fuck”

My brain is working on overdrive as I realise there is a real chance that I could land on my little deer… wait mine?... Shut up inner monologue, now is not the time. Seems all I needed to do to get my mind working again was look to my left and see her falling with me.

“Oh fuck” I mutter and reach out to grab her arm, at least she isnt flailing around. I pull her towards me and make sure that she is above me so I take the impact when we hit the net. I pull her against my chest and then we hit the net. We bounce once, twice, smack, her head bounces off of mine. When we are finally flat on the net I hear a groan as her head pops up from against my chest to look at me.

“Why the fuck is your head so goddamn hard” She mutters at me with an angry expression on her face, she looks about as dangerous as a kitten and I can’t help but chuckle. 

“Um Eric? And a new person? Why did you guys jump together?” I hear Four ask from the side of the net. I look over at him and make a ‘bitch are you dumb’ face.

“Obviously we didn’t do this on purpose Four, some idiot Erudite boy ran at her so he could be the first jumper instead, but knocked me off and well I accidentally hit her and took her down with me” I grumble, as I lift her off of me and hand her over to Four. After she is off of me I climb off the net myself.  

“Are you hurt?” Four askes her, she looks up and starts laughing at him. Four gives me a confused look and I just shrug. 

“Ha ha there are four of you spinning around just like the number and your name” she tells him while laughing, Four and I make eye contact and cringe a little, she probably has a concussion. 

“I think she is concussed” He said

“Yeah she smacked her forehead against mine when we landed, I’ll take her to the infirmary while you and Lauren deal with the rest of them” I say, I turn to her and my brain decides this is the perfect time to find out her name. 

“What’s your name?” I ask her while holding onto her shoulder so she focuses on me instead of giggling at whatever she is seeing float in the air.

“Wyn” she says, “But like spelt W-Y-N… I’m pretty sure” she continues while rubbing her head. Well I hope she was right, or that will be the name she is stuck here with anyway.

“Okay, First jumper Wyn” Four yells to the others.

“Alright ready to go” I ask, I contemplate letting her try to walk beside me to the infirmary, but seeing as she saw four of Four earlier, with my luck she’d walk off another ledge somewhere. I decide it will just be easier to carry her, so I pick her up bridal style. It wasn't until I picked her up that I realised how small she is. I'm glad to see she isn’t skin and bone, that would now end well for her here if she was. But she sure as hell is short. 

“I could walk” She said

“You could, but this is easier, I don’t need you getting lost on the way and I have to come back and find you anyway” I tell her. I watch her huff and cross her arm in a pout. I can’t help but smile down at her, I could get used to having her in my arms more. I shake my head to get rid of the thought, now is not the time for that.

“Whatever you’re lucky i’m tired anyway” Wyn muttered while leaning on my shoulder and closing her eyes

“Wait no don’t sleep… shit” I say, shaking her a little to try and keep her awake but it is of no use, she is sound asleep. I sigh and continue to walk towards the infirmary. I pay no mind to the shocked and confused looks my other Dauntless members give me. Must be a shock for them to see the big bad Eric carrying a sleeping girl around the compound. 

Once I make it to the infirmary, nurses come up and rush me to put Wyn down on the bed. I do so and get out of their way so they can do whatever they need to do. I answer their questions on what happened. After about 15 minutes they tell me that she is fine, just concussed and that they will call me when she wakes up. They guess it will take 3-5 days for her to be fully healed thanks to the new treatment Erudite made for concussions. But that someone will need to monitor her the whole time. I thank them for their help, as the last people you want to hate you here at Dauntless are the nurses so I make sure to stay on their good side. They shoo me away to leave Wyn to rest. 

I make my way to Max’s office to discuss what we should do and what our next steps are seeing as she will need a permanent babysitter for the next week. I knocked on Max’s office door and entered after he confirmed he was there. 

“Well just got back from the infirmary, our first jumper Wyn will need to be monitored for a minimum of 3 days according to the nurses.” I tell Max

“So essentially she can’t live in the dorms right now and needs to live with a Dauntless member until she’s deemed healed by the doctor” Max says 

“Pretty much, any idea who would have space for that and actually make sure she doesn’t die?” I ask him 

“I feel like it is pretty obvious Eric” Mac says to me with a grin on his face that makes me feel uneasy

“I don’t like that grin… who do you have in mind… wait, nope I refuse, I like my space and I don’t share” I tell Max, crossing my arms, in reality I wouldn’t mind having to look after Wyn, but at the same time having her in my personal space could be dangerous. 

“Oh come on Eric, it’s not like i’m saying she is permanently moving in with you, you make the most sense, you’re a leader that is overseeing initiation and Four is your neighbour. So he could watch her when you can” Max says 

“You want Four and I to split custody of her?” I ask, Max gives me a pointed look, I know that look, it means his decision is final and I have no choice, I sigh, “Fine, i’ll go make the spare bed for her” I mutter walking out of Max’s office, not before seeing his smirk. He is doing thing in purpose to torture me.

I run into Four and the other initiates while walking back to the training room. Four looks at me and shakes his head, great even he doesn’t have faith in this initiation class and he actually is nice to people. I sigh and walk beside him. 

“I’m getting a roommate that we are supposed share custody of according to Max for a week” I mutter, Four raises his eyebrows in confusion, “Wyn, the first jumper, she has a concussion and with the new treatment from Erudite she has to be monitored the whole time until she is fully healed and apparently Max decided I was the best person for that” I continue, Four bursts out a laugh and I see the initiates give us a confused look,

 “What the fuck are you looking at” I bark out at them well elbowing Four hinting ag him to get his manical laughing under control, the initiates immediately apologize and look away,

“Sorry, sorry” Four says as I glare at him, “He thought you would be the best? That’s hilarious” he continues, before I can punch the stupid grin off his face my phone buzzes, I see it’s a message from the infirmary that Wyn is awake and she is ready to be discharged.

“Oh shut up” I mutter, “Finish up the tour and make sure the initiates are on time for dinner, I don’t need another scolding about not feeding the initiates” I tell him 

“Yes sir” Four says while saluting at me, I roll my eyes and head back to the infirmary to pick up Wyn.

[kandisheek]

FIC REC WEEK 41 – FRIENDSHIP

STEVE & SAM

Big Enough Bucket by Kathar

Pairing: Steve & Sam Rating: G Words: 1,659 Tags: ALS Ice Bucket Challenge, Sam's Wings, Social Media

Summary: "Sam, no," says Captain America-- because if there's one voice instantly recognizable these days no matter how distracting the background noise is, it's Steve Rogers. People hear it in their sleep. Or... going to sleep. It continues: "This is crazy. And unnecessary." Sam Wilson takes the ice bucket challenge.

Reasons why I love it: Wow, the Ice Bucket Challenge, that really takes me back. I really love the Avengers spin that Kathar put on it – adrenaline junkies, the lot of them – and I especially enjoyed the meta commentary about what's happening on social media while the video airs. This fic is fantastic, and I really hope you give it a shot for yourself!

Barefoot Over Broken Glass by Ultrageekatlarge

Pairing: Steve & Sam Rating: T Words: 3,377 Tags: PTSD, Panic Attacks, Serious Talks

Summary: It’s been three weeks since the helicarriers, and Sam’s not doing too great.

Reasons why I love it: This fic feels like nails on a chalkboard in the best possible way. It's tense and uncomfortable and everything that I love in a fic that portrays mental health struggles. Poor Sam is going through a lot, and Steve is struggling so much with how to help him that it hurts my heart. And the ending gave me hope as much as it made my heart sink. This fic is fantastic, and you should definitely read it!

Audio Commentary Track With Steve Rogers by copperbadge

Pairing: Steve & Sam Rating: T Words: 3,003 Tags: Academic Conferences, Film Studies, Rhetoric

Summary: Steve didn't know you could go to college to study movies.

Reasons why I love it: As someone who went to film school, this fic feels like it was written specifically for me. The thought of Steve being a movie buff who's interested in making his own someday makes me want to do a happy dance. Anyway, I love this fic, and you should definitely read it, if you haven't yet!

Next-morning-itis by Feather (lalaietha)

Pairing: Steve & Sam Rating: T Words: 4,425 Tags: Mental Health Professional, Recovery, Worried Sam

Summary: Sam doesn't care if the rumours are true and Genius Stark does have a computer program or even an AI to screen his calls, eventually that's going to get tired of Sam calling, even if it has to develop sapience first to do it. Although Sam's phone might beat him to it: he feels like Siri's getting annoyed at him already. Doesn't matter. He can do this all day.

Reasons why I love it: Sam truly is the best friend anyone could have. His worry for Steve is really touching – and understandable, because Jesus Christ, Steve. I also really love the conversations Sam has with Pepper and Laura respectively, they're both such queens. Definitely check this one out, it's amazing!

Vaccinate Your Fucking Kids by bisexualamy

Pairing: Steve & Sam Rating: T Words: 2,355 Tags: Liberal Steve, Politics, Anti-vaxx

Summary: “Sam, these kids are trusting their parents to protect them,” Steve said, “and these parents are listening to this ‘Jenny McCarthy,’ and people like her, who are telling them that the best way to protect their kids is to stop them from getting one of the best things modern medicine has ever invented. I can’t just sit here drinking coffee and pretend I didn’t read about this.” Sam, knowing what was about to happen and realizing he was going to get dragged into it too, sighed and stood up a little straighter. “So,” he said. “I guess the question I should be asking is: what are we going to do about it?” (Or, the one where Aggressively Activist Steve Rogers finds out about anti-vaxxers and can't keep his mouth shut on the issue once he does.)

Reasons why I love it: Steve's outrage was basically my reaction the first time I heard of anti-vaxx as a concept, so this fic felt very cathartic for me. Not to get too political here, but this is something that I feel strongly about, so I'm very happy to see it represented in fic form. I hope you check this one out, because it deserves all the love it can get!

[shallyne]

The Diary of Feyre Archeron Ch 4

CHAPTER FOUUUUUUR! YAY!!! All chapters on A03

Words: 1.6k

TW: signs of a panic attack, death, implied murder

July 19th

It's barely daybreak and we already got bad news. Mom had a stroke last night, so severe that she's now in a coma. I tried talking to Nesta but she didn't reply and just left, Elain still seems in shock. I don't know how I feel, it all just seems going downward right now and there is no way to stop it. Is it possible to feel nothing about mom's stroke? Maybe I am in shock but I don't feel like I am in shock, I just, I feel nothing. Does that make me a bad person? Maybe it does, maybe I am a bad person but if I am a bad person, then mom is a bad person, too.

I'm trying not to think too much about it, Elain and Nesta are more important right now because they do feel something, and I want to make sure that they know I am there for them if they want to talk. I doubt they will but it's always nice to know that there is someone, right?

Also, should we tell dad? Should we tell him soon or wait for some news? He's going to be devastated, like we were when we lost everything because of his antics.

I shouldn't go down this route right now, maybe another time.

Well, I guess it's time now to get ready for school, maybe Rhys will distact me from this shitshow my family is right now.

July 20th

Rhys told me today that he needs to talk to me soon about something important, whenever I have time. I only have time next Saturday and he was okay with meeting in the little park close to school then, so it can't be urgent.

OMG, maybe he's asking me on a date? That MUST be it!! I don't know how I am just thinking about it. Maybe I can borrow a dress from Nesta for Saturday and wear a little makeup. I don't know much about makeup, maybe Elain can help me. This is so exciting. FINALLY!! I'm totally saying yes but not instantly, he took long enough to ask me on a date.

I'll let my hair open, I know he likes it. I did it once and he told me I looked pretty, so that's a given. I also have this perfume I'm only wearing for special occasions, I'll use that, too.

Maybe I can get some details about it in the following week.

This is the best day of my life!!!!

Also, Ianthe has been a bitch to me. Rhys had told me she kept flirting with him after he rejected her a bajillion times and I told her to go away after she tried AGAIN. Unbelievable, right?

Such a shame she smashed her hand in her locker door in the PE changing room where no one could see us her.

I hope it heals just fine, would be sad if it didn't.

July 21st

I'm trying to draw and I just can't. Everytime I try I'm staring at a blank canvas, which is just as blank as my mind. I thought the maybe-date with Rhys would inspire me at least a little but it's impossible. I have a creative block. Even thinking about picking up a pencil or a brush takes all my energy, I never felt this way about painting. Painting was always my escape, I was always good at expressing any feeling through art. Now, I just get angry. I want to take the canvas and throw it away. I like having this diary but it's not the same as painting, I can't express myself in words like I do in sketches and paintings, or even scribbles. That part of me just feels empty now, like someone stole all the colors, all lights and feelings and shapes. It's a void.

Elain looked at my canvas and told me to give it a few days, maybe she's right. It's a stressful time for us all. We will get through this and then we go back to our normal lives because everything will be okay.

I'm trying to tell myself that at least, like Elain does, but there is always a little voice in my head that doubts any happiness will come our way.

The feeling of impending doom is still there, gripping me everyday, reminding me that all is not okay. Maybe it's just a puberty thing, I'm sure Nesta and Elain went through the same thing. I wouldn't know, talking about feelings in the Archeron household is like eating a steak as a vegan. You don't do it.

July 26th

Rhys is dead to me.

He and his stupid father don't exist anymore, not in my world. They are dead. DEAD.

Rhys hadn't invited me to ask me on a date, I didn't get ready, borrowed Nesta's dress, let Elain do my makeup, use my good perfume, because he wanted to ask me on a date. No, he invited me to tell me that he is the reason for ruining my life. My whole family's life. That we have NOTHING! Okay fine, it's his father's fault but what's the difference? I AM SO ANGRY. He just moved here to ruin my father's business because of some stupid deal my father broke. Speaking of father, my father is just as dead to me. He can rot in hell, I hope he rots in prison. My sister's are suffering because of HIM. Because of his decisions, because of Rhysand's family. I hate my father, I hate Rhysand's father, I hate Rhysand.

I must have looked just as distraught as I feel because Nesta knew instantly that something happened when I came home. I told her everything, her and Elain, and she is seething.

I can't believe I fell for Rhysand, I can't believe I fell for a fucking lie.

I'm just so angry I can barely breathe. I can't breathe. I can't fucking breathe.

How am I supposed to see Rhysand everyday at school and not scream at him, at the unfairness of it all. How can I ever look at myself, live with myself, for falling foe his tricks to get close to me like a fool.

It was all a lie.

Dad's business was a lie.

Our life was a lie.

Rhysand was a big fucking lie.

I can't breathe.

July 31st

I'm sitting in a train.

The last twenty-four hours five days felt like a bad nightmare, one I just want to wake up from. But it's not a nightmare, is it? It's real.

Mom is dead. They said it was the stroke. Rhysand said it wasn't. I don't know why I believe him but he looked genuine. Maybe I am a fool for trusting him in this but Nesta seems to believe him, too.

Ruining my father's business wasn't the last of Rhysand's father's plans for my father. My father ruined a big deal, now Rhysand's father ruins his life. Meaning that he sends out his men to kill the people my father loves. Which includes my mother. And his daughters.

I think this is how shock feels, feeling like an empty shell. Every movement feels robotic, only muscle memory making me move.

Nesta told me that Rhysand's brothers knocked like crazy on the front door, the tall one was even short of breaking the freaking door down, to warn them about the threat on their lives. Meanwhile Rhysand dragged me out of that diner, kicking and screaming. I didn't want to listen, I didn't want to touch him, but he didn't budge. He brought me to my sisters. Telling me the plan.

The plan to send us away, to a friend who can help us. I think his name was Jurian. We are traveling to him now, he lives in a little city near Austin.

After that we won't be the Archeron’s anymore, we will live under another name, in a city far away.

I don't even know why Rhysand helped us, why would he care. He used me as a pawn for his father and now he helps us running away? I know that he said he never used me but the timing of befriending me seemed convenient. He also said he wouldn't track us after we got our new identities in Austin, but I don't know if I believe him. Maybe his friend will rat us out.

I made a promise to myself when we entered the train station this morning. I promised to keep Nesta and Elain safe, whatever it takes. They used me, they got my mom but they won't get my sister's.

Also, dear diary, this will be my last entry. Nesta wanted me to burn my diary, so it couldn't be tracked to us, but we compromised and I would keep it hidden wherever we end up. Never touch it again.

It was nice to have you as a silent companion as long as it lasted.

Bye

Excerpt from a group chat between Rhysand, Morrigan, Cassian and Azriel

Azriel: They just left Jurian’s house.

Cassian: so, that's it?

Morrigan: no contact anymore, it's to keep them safe, Cassian

Cassian: I know but how sure can we be that Aamon’s men won't track them down?

Rhysand: they won't

Cassian: but can we be SURE

Azriel: yes

Morrigan: Rhys, have you told Feyre?

Rhysand: no, it wasn't the time

Morrigan: there will never be the perfect time to tell someone you love them but it was your last chance

Rhysand: I know

Cassian: maybe it won't be forever

Rhysand: maybe

Morrigan: maybe

Azriel: maybe

Feysand Taglist:

@captain-of-the-gwynriel-ship @starfall-spirit @rhysiedarling @corcracrow @sydney-fae25 @tothestarsandwhateverend @aayo-whatt @dreamlandreader

[fyodoro]

HII! i've been into dance moms lately help😭 can i req akito , toya, and rui (separatly) w a fem s/o who was on dance moms? if u dont wanna write this thats ok hehe have a good day!

-> 𝐃𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞, 𝐝𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞, 𝐝𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞!

You felt a lot of indifference towards your past position, but they’re always there to tell you you’re more than your past

With Akito Shinonome, Toya Aoyagi and Rui Kanishiro

Cw! Mentions of past trauma, yelling, implied past anxiety attacks, self sabotage (kinda), you punch rui!!!! | fluff (akito’s), comfort (toya’s), Angst to fluff (rui’s)

Akito Shinonome

When Akito first met you, he knew he’s seen you somewhere before. He just couldn’t put his finger on it, but knew you were a familiar face. It wasn’t until one fateful day Ena woke up earlier than usual and put something on the family TV.

He recognized your face instantly, and everything fell into place. ‘You looked so familiar because Ena would watch you all the time on TV.’

A scoff escaped the ginger’s lips, how could he forget that? Although, you have changed quite a bit since you stopped appearing on the show. The version of you practicing on the television now is so tiny compared to who you are now. Both mentally and physically.

“You’ve been a little too interested in Dance Moms Akito, you feeling okay?” Ena said teasingly. It’s not often she saw her brother paying attention to something like that.

“I’m fine. Hey- does it really matter what I watch and don’t watch?” Ena laughed at his remark, brushing him off and sending him to the Cheesecake shop they both like to pick a slice up for her.

The younger rolled his eyes in annoyance at her request, but did so anyway. At least he could get a slice for himself.

The walk was just like any other, gripping the money tightly in his pocket and only focusing on his destination. Well, that was Akito’s main focus. Coincidentally, he just so happened to see your face in the crowd. It took him a moment to recognize that it was the current you. After all, he just finished watching your younger self on an old show.

There was a silent debate in his head on whether he should go up to you or not. ‘Wouldn’t that be creepy?’ He thought. But it’s not like he’s a stranger to you… you couldn’t mind too much, right? Before he could finish the debate, the boy found himself walking your way already.

“Oh, Akito? I didn’t know you came around these parts. What’s up?” The small smile on your face felt a little forced, but Akito paid no mind to it.

“I could say the same to you, I didn’t think someone like you would come to such a crowded area.”

His words rang in your head a bit, ‘someone like me?’ You thought. While you didn’t want to acknowledge it, you knew what he was talking about. ‘I guess I can’t keep it a secret for too long to anyone.’

“Oh well you know, it’s been so long since I dropped out the show. Not many people recognize me anymore. Which actually, I’m pretty grateful for.” You said. While you liked the attention for a bit, it got overwhelming fast. Learning how to keep up with fake fronts to strangers was exhausting, though Akito didn’t seem to mind the natural you.

“Yeah, I only realized it was you when my sister put one of your episodes on earlier. But it’s cool, you’re still (Name) at the end of the day.”

Something about his words were comforting. At the end of the day, you were just a regular person. It felt nice to have someone acknowledge that without putting you on a pedestal.

“Hey, where were you heading?” You asked. Partly out of genuine curiosity, and partly out of wishful thinking. Maybe you can tag along with him.

“The bakery, I’m picking up some cheesecake for me and my sister. She sends me on these errands a lot.” He scratched the back of his head a bit. One thing you both had in common? Keeping up a fake appearance in front of certain people.

“Oh, I know the bakery your talking about, I love it there! Can I come with you, perhaps?” Honestly, you just wanted to get out of the crowded plaza. Otherwise if someone recognized you here, you’d be too exhausted to do anything for the rest of the day.

Akito didn’t mind one bit. He sensed some desperation in your voice, and assumed what you were thinking. There was a mutual understanding that both of you were trying to make yourselves look good right now.

He wouldn’t mind getting to know the other side of your personality a lot better.

Toya Aoyagi

Toya wouldn’t have known who you were until An pointed it out. He wasn’t aloud much television or internet access as a kid, and when he was, it was always monitored. So to say he was clueless would be an understatement.

It didn’t help that An was so casual about it, just casually saying;

“You see that student? They were on this show I used to watch as a kid, Dance Moms, isn’t it so cool she goes to our school?”

When Toya hears this, he thinks it might have been an idol show, and you were a former idol. It wouldn’t be anything new for An to be so normal about being acquainted with a popular figure. The dual hair boy let his curiosity get the best of him and looked up this… “Dance Moms.”

He only watched the episodes you were in, trying to understand where your coming from and what made you so special. Though when he finished, he felt more worried about you than he’d have liked.

Watching you get screamed at over messing up precise steps, seeing you get belittled to put other dancers up, it looked traumatic. He could understand why you dropped out of the show, the experience didn’t seem like a pleasant one.

The next day, seeing you in the halls felt… different. He just watched a big chunk of your childhood, and now he has to act like he doesn’t know a thing about you. Surely you wouldn’t like to be talked to cause you were on such a exploiting show as a kid? With each passing period, he noticed you more and more.

But seeing you alone throughout the day made the boy feel bad. Did you choose to be alone? Did others avoid you because of how they watched you get screamed at so much as a kid? He wasn’t sure. But he was sure something in him made him take a seat next to you on a bench.

The silence was awkward and the tension felt thick. ‘I definitely should have thought this through.’ He thinks. He clears his throat, getting ready to speak before you ended up speaking first.

“What do you want? Come here to tell me how bad of a dancer I was on that show?” Your voice was laced with disgust, emphasizing that disgust even more when you mentioned “that show.”

While Toya was no expert on dancing, he knew that your dancing wasn’t bad at all. Sure, you might have screwed up a few moves. But didn’t everyone? Yours just so happened to get more shunned than any others did.

“No, actually. I’ve seen you alone a lot, and everyone could use some company.” He said sincerely. He knew bringing up your status wasn’t a good idea, and avoided mentioning it. You appreciated that, but only a bit.

You looked frustrated. ‘Why would you be frustrated?’ He thinks to himself. He would understand being upset, or even a bit annoyed. But frustration felt like an odd emotion to feel in this situation. To him, at least.

“You’re just going to try and get close to me, get a little bit popular, and leave with that popularity. That’s what they all do, I assume you’re no different from them. Maybe your double colored hair represents how two faced you are.” That’s a bold claim…

He began piecing the puzzle together. You were always alone because you distanced yourself from everyone, and you had a fear. It made sense now, the fear of being used was a scary one to him. At the same time, he wants you to see having real friends is important, much better than being alone.

“In that case, could I prove to you I’m not… ‘two-faced’?” He asked. You almost choked on your spit at that. Why would he want to prove anything to you?

“If you try hard enough, maybe. I can’t be fooled easily by whatever your going to do.” There was a trace of amusement in your voice, as if this was the first time you’ve heard a funny joke. But with that amusement also came bitterness.

Toya made a pact with himself, and a silent pact with you. He would do whatever it took to show you having friends isn’t so bad, as long as you find the real ones. And he’s okay with being your first real friend.

Rui Kamishiro

Rui was sure he was mistaken. Someone so talented- popular- someone with such a clean reputation… wants to be with him? He couldn’t believe it.

For a moment, he thought of putting distance between the two of you. Someone like you shouldn’t be around someone like him. People would surely get the wrong idea, and then you’d lose everything. He didn’t want that for you, not at all.

The best way to avoid that outcome?

Distancing himself.

The tall alchemist almost felt like he was in junior high again. The way he pushed you away was all too familiar to the way he pushed Nene away, and he hated it. But, this was for your own good.

At least, that’s what he wanted to believe.

He found it difficult to keep you away. After class ends, you’re always running up to him with lit up eyes. It was a subtle part of his day that he didn’t realize he loved so much, he missed it.

Now he had to ignore that light and walk directly to the next class. It hurt, but he paid no mind to it. You were probably doing just as well, if not, better, without him.

Though that wasn’t the case at all.

In your eyes, Rui had left you alone in the dark. There was no explanation for the sudden cut off, there was no sign of it beforehand. It had you running in circles in your mind. ‘What could I have possibly done?’ You thought.

You attempted to confront him, multiple times in fact. But every time he sees you, he scurries away hastily. Apart of you wanted to slap him across the face, but the other part just wanted to break down in front of him and beg for an explanation.

You two were practically best friends before all this. He helped you out of being crowded by old fans and was like a bodyguard at times. Rui never cared about the person you used to be, he only cared about the person you are now. It meant a lot to you.

But now it seems he’s forgotten all about that.

You needed to corner him if you wanted an explanation. He had to be alone with no excuse to just “go away.” You just had to catch him at that perfect time. Even if it takes awhile, you’ll wait as long as you need for him.

A few days went by with 0 luck. The only time you saw an opening, he started messing with two underclassmen. One looked like he was about to snap Rui’s neck while the other was keeping him from doing so. It was an amusing sight, and you were happy to see Rui in his element. Even if you wish those two underclassmen went another way.

Making your way to the vending machines, you spotted the familiar purple haired boy fiddling with the buttons. A look of irritation plastered on his face as he begins to shake the machine from the sides.

‘Ah, something must have gotten stuck.’ You thought. This wasn’t an opportunity you could miss, it was too good. You walk up to Rui and the vending machine, helping him shake it a bit more vigorously before the soda candy finally dropped. He bent down to open the slot and retrieve his snack, and then turned to you.

“Why thank… you..” A face of realization flashed across his face. ‘Theres no way out of this one.’ He thought.

“Rui.”

“(Name)…”

Rui looked at everything except you, trying his hardest not to crack open. What could you possibly want from him that’ll put your reputation at risk?

“Can you tell me? Tell me what I did. You stopped talking to me out of no where, and keep avoiding me! Do you have any idea how hard I’ve been trying to talk to you?” Your voice cracked a bit. There was a deep sense of desperation in your voice that only a fool could miss, and Rui was no fool.

“I just thought you’d be better without me (Name). You’re talented, beautiful, and most of all, a good person. If people see you with me they’re going to think you’re a weirdo like me.” He never realized how dumb his idea sounded until he said it out loud. He wanted to distance himself because you were more important than him? ‘Pathetic of me…’ he thinks.

A silence coated the two of you, and the last thing you wanted was to indulge in it. This whole time… he was avoiding you because of your reputation? Because he didn’t want to ruin your reputation just by being around you? You wanted to laugh.

“I hope you know how happy I am being your friend. You don’t water me down to “a previous dancer on television” and you never did. I always appreciated that and I just- I just want to keep being with you Rui.” This time you couldn’t stop the voice cracks, or the lone tears falling down your cheeks.

Like all the times before, Rui pulled down his sleeve and wiped your tears. His gesture made your heart melt like it always did. He couldn’t stand seeing you cry, it was only worse you were crying because of him.

“I’m sorry (Name), if I had known… I would have stayed with you. I won’t let a mistake like this happen again, I promise.” His tone was sincere and gentle. His hands still on your cheeks from wiping your tears, it was a moment you could stay in forever.

But you weren’t going to forget what he did that easily, no matter the reason. You pulled away and punched his shoulder a little harsher than intended. He yelped in brief pain, clutching his shoulder.

“What was that for??!” He nearly laughed, but refused to give you the reaction you wanted.

“That was for leaving me in the dust for days! Do it again, and it’ll be worse.”

Rui didn’t wanna know what that meant, and deepened the promise he made in his head SK he would certainly never do that again.

Despite the stinging pain he felt, he smiled.

‘I really missed this..’

[simply-slytherin]

Guess who finally finished Sebastians quest and saw the last pensive memory. This gal. And let me tell you I HAVE SOME THOUGHTS AND THEORIES FRIENDS! LONG ramble & spoilers for HL below the read more.

Sebastian quest:

So first of all focusing on the Sebastian quest line Solomon was so out of pocket for trying to attack us while inferi we're attacking us?  Like excuse me sir are you actually just trying to kill us maybe let's take care of the undead before we start fighting?  Also this man was an auror right so like he should be able to easily disarm 2 students without having too completely fight us like he was.

Also the Slytherclaw in me was coming out because when he destroyed that artifact I got so mad that is history and like an archeological find and now it's lost to history because he destroyed it instead of responsible people studying it.

But I do have to say I feel like it was very obvious that he had some PTSD or a lot of his own issues that hes trying to figure out. So he clearly also wasn't dealing with the situation in a healthy way none of it was healthy or good.

I obviously did not turn in my main boy Sebastian absolutely not we are ride or die lol.

Main Quest:

The way I'm playing the Isadora and Sebastian crosslines are happening like simultaneously. So it's super easy to see the similarities and comparisons between the 2 about how Isadora and Sebastian are trying to help people but maybe it's not doing so in the right way. Obviously I think Sebastian is way more in the right than Isadora. Like originally when I was reading theories about Isadora I was totally kind of on her side but then when they started showing that she was practicing her magic on students....minors.... like literally 1st year Hogwarts students I was like OK now that's not cool.

Also like her dad being wiped off all emotion is definitely a step too far I believe there could be an importance for relieving pain when needed but pain is also there to help us learn and appreciate the good in life. Literally this is a Vampire Diaries moment do not turn off your humanity switch LMAO.

I just want to mention that because my MC is a girl San Bakar's comments to us about not feeling like we are trustworthy felt lowkey a little sexist just because we are the only other 5th year female to wield this power other than Niahm.

OKAY NOW FOR THE GAME THEORY:

At the moment of writing this I technically have not finished the full game but I know it happens,  But I remember people theorizing about a specific part that I just witnessed with Isadora and her death.

When San Bakar does the avidikidivi on Isadora and she x_x yknow.  We see these little traces of ancient magic leaving her into the repository. And I saw a lot of people theorizing that maybe this is her leaving some part of her behind and that there's something hidden there but I actually think a more likely theory is that the part of her that is leaving is used to somehow help set up her pensive so that the future ancient magic weilder can see her memories. So she basically set up a plan B.

What I also found really creepy was that as she is dying like being hit by the spell her eyes kind of go blank and she smiles falters and then falls whereas we have seen a lot of people will just instantly die. I have 2 theories on this one of them that is connected to her setting up the pensive is her knowing that everything is safe like her memories and her theories and that they'll be passed on but I also think that she has removed pain from herself to the point that she doesn't even feel the pain of the most powerful killing curse.

It's a little bit like death note lol where I think this dark use of ancient magic tainted her and changed her personality from her true self almost like a drug.  To be honest I wouldn't be surprised if she actually made horcruxes.

Anyways I was a lot of rambling but I do think that the Keepers are also a bit wrong for a just completely shutting this down instead of looking into it any responsible healthy way.

Thank you for listening to my Ted talk lol if anybody wants to theorize with me please hit me up I would love to chat!!!