#but i get people navigate the world differently then i do
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transfaguette · 7 months ago
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truly one of the biggest pet peeves of mine is when someone is faced with a non mainstream identity and they say “I don’t understand it but I respect it!” like i don’t think you realize what constantly being told “I fundamentally don’t understand you and am comfortable making no attempt to try!” does to a person.
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sadisthetic · 9 months ago
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BURST💥
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payasitas · 7 months ago
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my nightmare last night was specifically about being older in my 30s already. working at a video game company in their art and design departments. except, i wasn’t doing anything hands on or creative there at all. my only job was to clean up after the people there, while thinking i could've drawn or designed something better than the scribbles presented on their monitors in my own hazy subconscious state. stewing inbetween this sense of envy and admiration. knowing that these people only really got their jobs because of their commendable confidence to actually apply themselves. in reaching out to others and putting themselves and their work out there, while not failing to meet deadlines by sacrificing their work or anything either. a lot of things i still significantly struggle with..
i lived through a few days experiencing this environment, its office buildings, and the people housed in them. sitting by the wayside and only glimpsing into the lives i wish i had or felt that i could be part of. i was pretty much walking around a future i’d receive if i didn’t fundamentally change how i actually engage in my own life to meet similar criteria…a future that i feel would be just around the corner if i didn’t start to plan out which direction to go in and look at more options for myself. when i woke up in a cold sweat, i just thought about all the things i could do to try and regain my sense of self and my drive to actually create.
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the-physicality · 7 months ago
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why would they schedule the canada game at the same time as the march madness final?
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arielmagicesi · 1 year ago
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hey, do you want to lose money AND your will to live all for the opportunity to make very little money doing a job that everyone warns you will sap you of your will to live? try applying for teacher certification oh my GOD
#i feel like the world's rudest idiot because i finally went full 'i want to speak to your manager' on the njedcert people#because i had no other options!!!!!#and after a while of trying i got a phone call from an extremely nice woman (apparently the only reasonable person who works there)#who was so helpful and nice and finally told me all the information i should have been given 3 months ago#i guess if i wasn't dealing with [redacted family emergency things]#and if i had a degree in the NJEdCert Portal from Bureaucratic Bullshit University#then all of this would have been sooo obvious and i wouldn't have needed to call and email everybody on earth#begging them to explain things to me#but like. it is weird how confusing it is! it is weird how much effort i had to put in!#i'm a young millennial! i should not have had this much trouble navigating this online portal or whatever the fuck!#THERE IS A TEACHER SHORTAGE. THIS SHOULDN'T REQUIRE THE TWELVE LABORS OF HERCULES TO FIGURE OUT#aaaaahhhhh it's fine it's FINE!!! it's fine#i spent so much money and screamed a lot. not at the people working there. just during my nightmares#but it's fine. i can finally get the certification to do the unpaid student teaching so i can maybe later get a different certification#to do the paid teaching. which i'm sure will pay so so great#and so equivalent to the effort i put in and the way i'll be treated at that job#the new jersey education system is lucky that teaching is my 1 passion and that i'm really good at it and that i love it#because otherwise i would've given up and become the joker by now#written by me
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pepprs · 2 years ago
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cosmo wanda i fucking wish students understood that universities have limited reach and that public silence does not automatically mean no action is being taken internally and that the decisions of collectives / institutions do not reflect the decisions of all of the people within them (e.g. all faculty staff and administrators within an institution) etc etc. god DAMN it to hell. you people (not anyone reading this im saying this as if im talking to the student body at my school) look so fucking stupid @ing the social media accounts of distinct departments like that’s actually going to do anything. you think they ARENT doing anyrhing????? that’s probably ALL they’re focusing on rn and they’re spending days carefully gathering information so they can share it. and shit is hitting the fan in MULTIPLE areas rn if you haven’t noticed and also it’s winter fucking break so no one is even supposed to be working anyway. so what is wrong with you. why are you fucking making demands. getting a college to finally post an update about something is not the same as cancelling someone on twitter and the fact that so many of you think it is is indicative of how SICK our society has become. PLEASE calm down.
#purrs#literally about to start screaming. people have been so fucking stupid this year. that is all i am going to say.#and ik this bears a weight being a staff member here now but i was a student 6 months ago and years ago i used to do the same stupid shit an#and then i went to the retreat and learned that universities are communities made of people and that i can change the world by talking to#stakeholders and being strategic and patient and having civic courage and building relationships. and now i spend my life trying to teach#other ppl how to do that. so seeing students WHO I KNOW ARE AWARE THAT THIS ISNT THE WAY doing this makes me want to start SCREAMING. like#it was all for nothing. the HOURS of workshops you went through learning how to actually make change and ‘demand’ change and now you’re#engaging in this edgy bullshit. i want to curl up in a ball and/or jump out the window rn. sorry#delete later#work tag 2#this is literally the 5th or 6th incident in 2022 and i know it’s more complicated than that and yes there are genuine wrongdoings the#school / depts and individuals within it have committed. but also the knee jerk reaction of students to instantly turn into a mob and start#saying u*** does nothing u*** doesn’t care about it’s students is like are you KIDDING MEEEEEEEEE. ARE YOU KIDDING ME. how about you talk to#x person who i know firsthand is trying to navigate this issue and suppprt students. how about you join x committee that just made progress#in this area. how about you get offline and go touch grass and realize your COMMUNITY isn’t out to get you!!!!#institutions are not inherently bad lol. institutions are communities. communities are POWER. if i could send one message to everyone on the#planet i think it would be that or at least include that bc i would also want to say stuff abt how we are real and human and alive together#etc etc. but that is like. something so many ppl do not see. being part of a university is POWER. being a student is POWER. so use it for#good!!!!! join committees! set up meetings with admin!!!!! join student gov!! this learned helplessness of @ing the school is NOT THE WAY#not when you have tools and relationships at your disposal to actually make a sustainable long term difference. what are you waiting for! th#the whole world is yours!! it’s at your fingertips! do you feel it? do you see it?
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poptartmochi · 1 year ago
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i think that i will never be able to rid myself of Magdalena, despite my disdain for her source material, because she's just such a fun little inversion character 🤧
#not to say that im trying to actively get rid of her! but like.. i have bnha ocs that will probably never see the light of day again because#i dislike bnha 🕴️ and i dislike the reboot way more than i dislike bnha so You Would Think that maggie would have disappeared by now but#nauuur. the inversions will keep her in my brain forever babey 🍻#it's something about the way gioia and vergil knew each other for such a short amount of time and were on completely different journeys but#still managed to Get each other.. the same hatness of it all. and from that we got nero who saved both their lives#meanwhile in nightmare reboot world‚ magdalena and vergil have known each other forever + run parallel to each other basically. and you#think that the whole time they're in lockstep that they get it! they get each other! they're in lockstep so they must be in sync!#but then it turns out the goal vergil has been obsessively dedicated to all along is actually Super Contradictory to the goal magdalena has#been obsessively dedicated to. and instead of their lives being saved by their connection‚ the sudden dissonance is the root of their#downfalls. that's like my own personal fuckin percolator man 🤧🤧#it's fun that she and gioia are both driven by loss and the desire to mitigate it. they both live in these societies where you're constantly#watched and revealing your cards could spell out your doom. ignorance and guilt cause gioia to build up this marble facade of cold#nonchalance because she cannot engage in society Without revealing her cards yk. it hurts too much. so the poker face it is 🗿#meanwhile magdalena Knows Too Much and the knowledge of it all eats away at her. she's boiling with the need to act‚ so a poker face could#never work for her. so she channels the energy into this larger-than-life persona to navigate through the world#and both of these methods work! gioia's facade makes people think she's cold or uninteresting so they ultimately disengage with her.#magdalena dazzles everyone and they're too distracted by the show to notice what she's doing behind the scenes.#but wearing the mask all the time takes a toll on both of them + ultimately leads to a loss of identity‚ where they only keep themselves#grounded by their secret work. gioia's run in with vergil helps her break free of this and reestablish herself#whereas magdalena's departure(s 😐) from vergil sets her down this path... it's just so 🌋🌋🌋 to me#also. it's fun to me that gioia was meant to become a demon but never did. meanwhile maggie detests demons but was forced to become one...#gioia dodged a bullet but it traveled through dimensions and shot her anyways lol 😭🤧#there's something to be said about the flipped family dynamics between the two but ngl I'm still working on Maggie and Isaac's relationship#so. i will leave it alone for now 🕴️in the future though I hope that I can figure out how to make Isaac as relevant to Magdalena as#Benedictus is to Gioia 🤔 right now he's kind of a mystery variable 🙈#sriracha.txt#long post#💃🏻
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Okay why does this make so much sense???
I was diagnosed with autism when I was three years old and enrolled in an intensive ABA program, which attempted to use operant conditioning to train me out of acting autistic. One of the things that always confused me, reading over the ABA practitioner's notes decades later, is just how sweeping the category of "autistic problem behaviors" they were trying to extinguish in me was.
For instance, one such “autistic problem behavior” was my "reluctance to attend to non-preferred activities". When I was asked to do something I didn’t want to do, sometimes I would say 'no' or even cry before relenting and doing what I was told. Which is indeed uniquely disordered behavior, because neurotypical toddlers are famously obsequious angels who relish being ordered to do things they hate! (/sarcasm)
In all seriousness though, it's alarming that perfectly standard toddler stubbornness was something the ABA therapists felt they needed to condition out of me. It wasn't enough I learn to be indistinguishable from my non-autistic peers (which is already a messed up goal in its own right), the standard of “neurotypicality” I was told to aspire to seemed nothing short of being a perfectly obedient automaton. 
None of this made sense back when I thought neurotypicality was about normalcy. But it does now that I realize neurotypicality is, and always was, about control
it does more harm than good to prop up the myth of the ‘neurotypical’ who completes tasks cheerfully with no issues. this person is a capitalist fantasy. the more you define yourself in comparison to this myth the more you justify social structures staying the same with minor accommodations to the ‘exceptions’ and the continued pathologizing of discomfort under hostile conditions
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jaythelay · 1 month ago
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The Life Gems in DS2 are a damning mark against the game that genuinely further exemplifies why people have issues with the entire game.
To start, it's a crutch for game design. DS1 was designed, with levels that had intention behind beating them with 5-20 flasks of varying heal amounts. But because of this, it meant areas were more "chunky" than hallway-like. Segmented into almost mini-games if you will.
If it didn't separate "chunks" with a bonfire, it separated in unlocking a shortcut, elevator or ladder, a key or character. It meant even in death you took something with you. It wouldn't be a waste of time, you made progress of some form outside of just your character or equipment.
Life Gems cost souls, cost time to grind and find. Because of this, using one means Wasting Souls, and time, however it's used to progress forward. Dying...even if you retrieve your souls, means Wasted Time and Souls, which are also, Time. There's seldom few shortcuts due to the "Hallway" design they took for DS2 onwards. Shortcuts are Bonfires far more often than anything unique, and whatever items you find are very likely worthless since the worthwhile stuff is never within reach of general progress, but almost random "exploration".
Yes, the interconnected design of DS1 was a nightmare to create, but it's not like it's impossible to keep in some fashion, that's actually fun, mind you. Having "Chunks" is far superior to these fat hallways they keep making, with ER being the biggest hallway I've yet seen for any openworld. Wouldn't it have been cool to unlock shortcuts back to areas of the openworld? Instead of like, getting a horse and using tornadoes, or fast traveling...
What "Hallway" level design means, is "linear" as in only Point A and Point B with everything inbetween being spaghetti in a circle formed by A/B, pretending to be Point C/D/E, but make no mistake it's just a hallway that has no real exploration, just poor navigation pretending to evoke exploration via removing direction entirely.
Best way to describe it, is imagine A at the top, and B at the bottom, there's 3 paths, 2 of them dead end, and all 3 lines look like spaghetti. There's little design other than making the world look pretty and 'natural' but there's no direction for the player, think "yellow paint" but competent and respectable. So you're stuck aimlessly wandering a swamp that somehow feels like 8 swamps in one hoping desperately trying to find Point B getting stuck in Point J and N.
Because of this, it means you can basically be at any level with any gear, so fuck it, all the enemies have unreadable attack patterns, hop around at mach 50 multiple times, and are spammed every which possible way. The idea being that, you, have to find a way to avoid activating more than you can handle, over, and over, and ov-
Because of this, they rely on the crutch of "infinite heals" because god knows they know they couldn't design around something as simple as "they have either 5 heals or 20." There's no limitation so they don't have to care about level design, who cares! They can spend hours in the wrong area because they don't even need a Point B anymore!
Which again, is another problem, they treat Point B as THE reward, like it's not just a cool thing to find that helps you, it's THE reward, it's your fast travel, it's your means of navigation and direction, getting souls from a boss is frivolous without the bonfire, same with clearing an area, so keep that shit as obscured away from the player as humanly possible, so they're more likely to lose it all, until the end of a boss fight. Blegh, it's just hard for the sake of being hard, the challenge should be the obstacles, not the fact I'll be wasting time if I make one mistake I couldn't possibly have not made without trial and error.
Which there's a balance for everything I've said here to be complete clear, and to me, DS2 heavily lacks balance, because it's not designed around "Here's the challenge and you can do stuff to make it easier" it's almost always "Die to Learn and most times that's not enough so Heal Heal Heal baby good luck making progress!"
So, here's the deal, the simplification, When You are Considering something, your first thought is likely Resources. In the case of DS1, you know you have limited resources, so you Design Around That, there's an intention behind the obstacles that are intended to be overcome with that set amount of resources. Bonfires aren't The Reward, they're a signifier that you Made Progress.
DS2 doesn't consider that at all. It considers the Fight, or the Gank, and again, over and over, it's just about avoiding a gank, sure DS1 has this but it's like, harder to set up accidentally, for sure there's moments, but DS2 is nothing BUT that. Because of this, it doesn't feel like you're fighting, but playing a poor Dynasty Warriors. Since they basically can only design around Infinite Healing they have to make it so you never have time to heal, not because the AI is smart, but because the AI is bountiful and surrounding. You can't design around 6 enemies all clustering around the player and swinging in a Souls-Like that's Absurd, it's poor for that reason and constantly trying to avoid it is simply put, not fun, it's a one trick pony they rely on constantly. Bonfires are The Reward, they enable your means to fast travel Past the obstacles you just struggled horrifically through, it's a pat on the back after almost dying in a car crash. This means you're never rewarded until you No Longer have the chance to Waste Your Time in the exact same area, but a new area with the exact same problems.
To be clear I fuckin' love the artistry of DS2 and the lore, the characters, the theories, fan-art, but DS2's failures come in with Level Design more than anything else, and that Level Design is what lead to Life Gems. Your average player is not going to be able to Flask Only DS2, but you can in DS1, that's nothing to say, other than DS1 has far more intention behind it's entire design than DS2 does.
If DS2 had better level design I straight up think it would've been better than DS1 in far more areas but because of it's dreadful pacing and Hallway design, it's sheer obscurity of complex mechanics that in no way translated from DS1 nor transitioned into DS3, it remains as a unique experience that's incredibly difficult to enjoy. I really think it's like Chulip, it's not a game people recommend playing, but do recommend watching.
#Dark Souls 2#a ramble#not a rant to be clear#I'm trying to beat this fucking game for the first time#it was my first souls like and really did make me write off the series back then#But every time I see someone sing praises and show off elements of the game#I desperately ache to play it and enjoy it#but truth be told I really cannot get behind it's jank as hell feeling in everything#like the Heide Knight or whoever has a Frame 1 Attack input. The fuck? Like cmon dude who “designed” that?#Then he just kinda...Freezes and suddenly does a big attack and instant turning. Like bro what kind've telegraphing is making the animation#look like it's breaking? I honestly thought his code was broken til he just changed animations into an attack#also the fact my cool dual wielding Big Sword and Normal Sword is worse than the unmodified Beserker Sword...#It's just depressing. Like there's no point in experimenting because the fuck-off sword everyone uses really is just better to use#it breaks poise it does lotsa damage has a long reach#so frustrating because power stancing is cool but like why bother#and weapons break in 3 minutes it's so frustrating#and hitboxes are just fucking BAD dude there's no excuse#the examples some give to try and prove otherwise are anecdotal compared to the reality#also why the FUCK is there SO MUCH FREEZE after a swing oh my god. Just lemme dodge roll already shit#There's nothing less fun than getting 1 hit in and having to wait for their 6 swings and you do next to no damage#and you're constantly being pushed into yet another gank#There's alot of people who are very wrong about DS2 being a bad game. But that doesn't mean it's genuinely not well made#There's people who just like...for some reason run away from enemies instead of fighting setting themselves up for failure?#they're wrong. But other times people show off enemy AI that straight up has never happened to me before#and claim this is how people should've played. So I do it and...No that doesn't work actually#Just frustrating how it seems nobody has a clue about anything in this game from fan to hater. But the fans are cooler#People really should take the time to make a decent guide for it. It's designed to have someone holding your hand honestly#Not playing for you but navigating you.#Hell a Map would've made a world of difference#oh and
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foxmulderautism · 10 months ago
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urge to re-intro lover boy because i understand her better now.....this is why i am not built for wip intros because the minute it gets slightly outdated i am like NO NO NO DO NOT LOOK! but also omggggg new lover boy wip intro would be sooo fun and it's nearly valentines day too....valentines themed lover boy wip intro??? WAIT
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It's still so weird to me that the guy who wrote the fault in our stars and experienced global adulation and then global reprobation from the backlash and everything from SNL skits to being soft canceled on tumblr ....
was me.
Like, that guy was me. He lived in the same house I live in. One time he walked down to the river and cried and then yelled at himself for crying because who cries about having such a ridiculously good life.
I guess my big takeaway from that whole experience is 1. past me gave current me a lot of opportunities and freedoms for which I am grateful, including the opportunity to support cool people doing cool stuff, and the freedom to write about whatever I want (a memoir in the form of five-star reviews! A book about tuberculosis and its discontents!).
And also 2. the actual experience of Proper Fame is so unpleasant that I do not know how anyone who lives with regular pop culturey fame continues to seek it after getting a good hit of it. I admire the people who do--they get to make a lot of difference in the world in many cases. I am just baffled by them.
I would like to write books that seek large audiences again someday, but I'm not sure I'll ever be able to. I may need to stay in these small happy places where I've been able to live over the last five years.
But the complicated and ever-evolving tension between on the one hand wanting to have my own life, a life that truly and fully belongs to me, and on the other hand wanting to make stuff that is beloved by people and useful to them and so on ... it's a hell of a labyrinth to navigate, and I'm nowhere near out of it.
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askshivanulegacy · 1 year ago
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This. The two things you can do to actually change things are to go vote and to get yourself into political boards and offices.
How many people whining about the status quo actually bother to change it in a meaningful way? Almost none? That's what I thought.
It's not like it's particularly hard to do something, either. But Tumblr persists in useless, childish fantasies, from murdering rich people to drowning Americans in the sea.
If you can't mature your thinking and the actions you're willing to spend time and effort on, you will be left behind by those who will because they will outgrow their interest in you. They will be out there doing real things about real stuff and tumblrites will still be on the sofa, whining about literal nonsense.
“LOL. You think your vote matters? ROFL and LOL.” Yes, I am aware my vote carries less and less relative power the more people I’m voting with, but unlike your glorious violent revolution, it actually exists.
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i-like-media · 5 months ago
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I was wondering when they were going to play with the fact the Doctor is black now. 13 being faced with how people think of women was one of my favourite things in her era, so I was curious how they were going to treat his skin colour this season, if at all.
And honestly, Dot And Bubble exceeded all my expectations on the matter!
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What a lot of episodes about racism and bigotry do is coddle the viewer. They make clear early on "this is an episode about RACISM and why it's WRONG!" As if you've never heard of the concept before and don't know it's bad. The episode will often portray racism in an extreme sense and show the viewer the main characters are above that.
What Dot And Bubble did, for the entire episode, was letting the viewer figure it out on their own. There was no coddling, only racism as it silently existed. A perfectly pastel and white community with not a single person of colour and the only visible outlier being a goth white kid. And in this world, the first thing the character we follow did, was to block a black guy with a face of disgust.
The title screen rolls and you're left to rationalise it. Surely it was because he was not in her contact list/saying all kinds of mind blowing stuff... Right? Except when Ruby enters her feed and talks about it, she actually replies back... With an eye roll, but she replies... and keeps talking... and listening.
The episode continues, still not a single POC besides the Doctor. They reveal this is an exclusive place for rich people, and eventually the character in question even admits she thought the Doctor was a different person because "I thought you looked the same".
What this episode also does well, is portraying a character we wish to see change and find a better life behind that change. We see Lindy struggle to navigate the world without her bubble, calling herself stupid, and we genuinely hope she DOES learn to be better, even as you slowly pick up on what's been going on sofar. You are left to hope she'll thank him and realise the error of her ways, and maybe find a new drive to think for herself.
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And then she doesn't.
She stays in her bubble, doubling down on how she feels about the Doctor, how they're excited to be like their settler ancestors, and finally CLEARLY revealing to the viewers what's been off this whole time... and the scene asks: did YOU notice the signs? Did you see what went wrong along the way, or did you only notice just now when it's explicitly shown to you? And why do you think that is?
It challenges the perspective of the viewer and tells you to reflect on why you didn't see it coming, and that is so so powerful.
The Doctor's reaction to this scene..... 👌👌👌👌
His mouth is ajar, stunned beyond belief that after all he's done and all he can offer, the offer to literally save their lives, he is reduced to someone who's nothing more than the hue of his skin. He yells at them, telling them he doesn't care what they think of him because he's still the same doctor he's always been, and to still get rejected with a dirty look... Which hits extra hard when you remember how much the Doctor loves being himself. He LOVES being the Doctor again! And he walks with such a pep in his step, celebrating his existence and sharing it with all he meets... and then he tries to save some rich white kids from certain death.
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His performance in that moment was literally phenomenal. It's a narrative that's so powerful and so creative in its execution, my jaw was still on the floor throughout the credits.
This episode is definitely up there as one of my favourites sofar
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saintobio · 3 months ago
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⊹₊ ⋆🏍₊˚⊹ ON TRACK.
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when being the WAG of a rookie MotoGP rider earns you the front-row seats to a thrilling race and... an unsightly amount of groupies.
▞▞ pairings. ryōmen sukuna, fem!reader
▞▞ genre. fluff, established relationship, biker boy au, motogp rider au
▞▞ tags. biker!sukuna, motogp rider!sukuna, sukuna rides for ducati, WAG!reader, ooc, profanity, mentions of reckless driving, jealousy, insecurities, accidents, mentions of injuries, sukuna gets a little touchy in the end
▞▞ notes. 1.8k wc. do we miss biker!sukuna? i think we all miss biker!sukuna !! bahaha the influx of biker!sukuna fanarts made me write this. and also bcos i watched motogp clips on tiktok. rbs and comments highly appreciated! :D
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Have you ever imagined Sukuna as a MotoGP rider? 
Well, his passion for bikes didn’t just stay confined to the open road. He knew he was destined for more than just the city’s freeways and the thrill of 1000cc machines. He was, as a matter of fact, made for the track. 
Yes, the scary, dangerous, exhilarating world of high-speed competition.
When he had first told you about competing in MotoGP, you were thrilled for him. Truly, because you knew that the series had been his lifelong dream. Before, he was just a little boy who collected bikes for toys, and now he had the chance to make his dream a reality. So, who were you to stand in the way of that?
In fact, you were incredibly supportive—always present at his races, always cheering for him from the stands. It didn’t matter if you’d lose your voice the next day. You had to be his biggest supporter. And today was just another one of those days where your duty as his #1 fan called for you to be there and root for him with all your heart. 
Today’s MotoGP race was in full swing, and your heart pounded in rhythm with the thundering bikes tearing down the track. They all passed by in a resounding zoom! where your eyes could barely keep up from their otherworldly speed. From your vantage point in the VIP section, you watched intently as the riders navigated the circuit, your eyes never straying far from one rider in particular—Sukuna, your longtime boyfriend, riding a Ducati Desmosedici GP24.
“I’m so nervous,” you murmured, hands clasped together as your eyes remained glued to your lover. 
Sukuna was a sight to behold on the track, and he always told you that his bike was an extension of himself as he maneuvered with precision and aggression. Honestly, it must be scary to be the one riding such powerful superbikes, especially when the roar of engines alone was a symphony of speed and power that sent chills down your spine. And while you were filled with anxiety watching your boyfriend on the circuit, the red and black Ducati eventually flashed past, neck and neck with the Aprilia rider, and the two bikes locked in a fierce battle for the lead. 
You could imagine the commentators keeping a close eye as they narrated the race on live television.
But you trusted in Sukuna’s talent. His ability to escape from cops with his old R6 back in his college days was proof enough of how ridiculous he could get with his speed. He didn’t get a single ticket because he managed to outrun them all. Though, of course, that wasn’t something you should be mentioning to anyone. He wasn’t actually proud of notoriety and history of reckless driving before, especially when he recalled having endangered your life once before while you rode with him as his backpack. 
And since Sukuna upgraded to being a professional rider now, you had your fair share of an upgrade, too. That manifested in the form of being part of the so-called WAGs—or wives and girlfriends of the racers. Life as a WAG wasn’t drastically different from your previous one, except now your boyfriend was a huge global sensation in the biker community, and you had become somewhat of a fashion icon yourself. That wasn’t even an exaggeration, because every time you were seen with him publicly, people would soon be talking about your off-duty looks and outfits all over social media. 
But going back to the main star of the show, your hands clenched around the railing, knuckles white, as the race progressed. It annoyed you that the Aprilia rider was pushing him to the edge but never quite managing to overtake. Tailing the two were the riders for Honda, Gresini, Pramac, and KTM among the few.
Cupping your hands around your mouth, you cheered for your boyfriend. “Go, baby! Let’s go!”
The giant screen above the track zoomed in on Sukuna, his Arai helmet fitting the aesthetics of his big, red bike. The effortless way he handled his bike sent a ripple of excitement through the crowd. There were lots of cheering, screaming, roaring, and… well, squealing. Your head naturally turned to the group of girls nearby who were the very cause of the high pitched noises, their squeals of delight making the other WAGs around you shake their heads in amusement.
“Oh my God, he’s so hot!” 
“Look at him! He’s perfect!” 
“Sukuna, marry me!” 
“I’ll give you my number later!” 
“God, I wanna hook up with him.” 
“Girl, me too!” 
“You think we should wait outside his hotel later?” 
“Count me in!” 
Groupies. You felt a surge of pride mixed with a twinge of jealousy as you watched their frenzied adoration for your boyfriend. Literally. Your fingers were itching to gouge their eyes out. You wondered if he had ever been tempted to cheat, that when you were busy with your own corporate life outside of being his girlfriend, he might have rewarded himself by sleeping with an influencer or two. Probably models, too. Those tall, gorgeous women who often get partnered with him on ads and photoshoots.  
But the thing was, you couldn’t blame them—yes, your boyfriend was undeniably handsome, and his chiseled features and intense gaze made him a magnet for attention. A true eye-candy if you may add. Not to mention, he had the most attractive tattoos you had seen in a man. Ever. 
But he was yours, and that knowledge filled you with a sense of triumph over the hundreds and thousands of girls that were fantasizing about him.
Then, in the middle of your trance, an accident struck.
It was a blur of red and black as Sukuna’s bike suddenly wobbled after the rear wheel slipped on a patch of oil left behind by another rider. You held your breath in, praying to every saint that he remained safe, as you watched him struggle to regain control while the bike fishtailed dangerously. 
“Oh, gosh. Oh, gosh.” Your brain rattled with anxiety as you gripped onto the railings. “Baby, no. No, be careful! You got this!” 
For a moment, it seemed he might manage to stay upright, but then the inevitable happened. Sukuna went down in a matter of seconds, and his bike skidded out from under him in a shower of sparks.
“Oh, shit!” 
A collective gasp rose from the crowd, and your heart was lurching in your chest as you saw how your lover hit the tarmac. The medics immediately rushed onto the track, while you were still awestricken as you stared at the screen displaying his fall. 
“Please be okay, baby! Please,” you muttered under your breath again and again. 
A fellow WAG eventually placed a hand on your shoulders, rubbing you comfortingly. “He’ll be fine. Don’t worry. Their gears are made for this.”
She spoke like true champ, and you knew you could put some trust in her words since she was a seasoned WAG. She had probably seen worst accidents that her husband had gone through while on track.
Still, you couldn’t help yourself. What if Sukuna sustained really terrible injuries? What if he broke a bone or two? What if he experienced a concussion? And if he did, what if he’d no longer remember you when he wakes up? Oh, Jesus. Your overthinking was the true culprit here. Yet there was nothing you could really do but wait for good news and hope that nothing too serious happened. Seconds felt like hours, and you were almost about to faint until you saw Sukuna finally standing up between the medics that surrounded him, waving to signal that he was okay albeit limping a little.
“Thank fuck!” 
“See? I told you he’s fine.”
Relief flooded through you, but unfortunately, such joy ended up being short-lived. Sukuna had lost precious seconds in the fall, seconds that allowed the Aprilia to pull ahead. And by the time he got back on his bike and rejoined the race, the gap was already too wide. 
He crossed the finish line in fifth place, a position that felt like a heart-shattering defeat after having been so close to victory.
As soon as the race was over, you didn’t even think twice when you made your way down to the paddock, pushing through the crowd and the throng of zealous fans just to reach your boyfriend. Your heart was still racing, almost akin to the superbikes that were speeding on the track moments ago, as you desperately looked for the love of your life. Only when you rounded the corner did you finally see him, helmet off and leathers dusty from the fall, talking with his team.
“Lovey!” you called out, face full of worry.
Sukuna was quick to turn at the sound of your voice, his expression softening the very moment his eyes landed on you. With long strides, he removed hi’s gloves and closed the distance between you two, and before you knew it, you were wrapped in his arms, the scent of leather and motor oil enveloping you in a comforting hug.
“Are you okay?” you asked, pulling back just enough to search his face for any signs of injury. “I was losing my mind back there!” 
As if he didn’t just experience a dangerous fall, he had a mischievous smile displayed when he looked at you. “I’m fine, baby. Just a little bruised ego.”
“It’s not a joke,” you whined, arms crossed at his lack of seriousness to the matter. “I was so scared when I saw you go down."
Very sweetly, he cupped your face in his hands and nuzzled his nose against yours. “Hey, it’s okay. I’m still alive, right?”
That’s true, you thought. But also… “You came in fifth,” you said, letting out a quieted sigh. 
But the Ducati rider himself was merely chuckling. Not even an ounce of heartbreak was shown on bis face. “Fifth place isn’t the end of the world, babe. I can live with that.”
You shook your head, not understanding how he could be so calm. Really. “But you were so close. You could have won!” And you’d blame it on your hormones, but you remembered the group of girls who cheered him on and decided to bring it up. “By the way, you had all those girls ready to throw themselves at you earlier. One of them even suggested waiting outside your hotel to hook up with you.” 
“Really? Where are those baddies?” he joked, looking around and trying to spot the girls until you flicked his forehead. “Ow! I was just kidding, babe. You’re the only one riding this dick day and night.” 
“Not funny.”
“But you’re so cute when you’re jealous.” He started attacking your cheeks with squeezes. 
While you, you tried your best to swat his hand away. “I’m not. Stooop—! You’re so annoying!” 
“Okay, okay!” He let out a deep chuckle as he raised his hands in surrender. “Anyway, I don’t care about them. I’ve already won the most important race of all."
You blinked twice in the same second, not comprehending his words. “What do you mean?”
Sukuna’s eyes soon softened into a teasing gaze. “I have my beautiful girl in my arms right now. That’s the only victory that matters to me.”
As much as you tried to contain it, a smile eventually broke across your face. “You’re such a sap!”
“Only for you,” was his elfish response, pulling you closer. 
The celebrations continued around you as the media and the crowd swarmed into the paddock. Sukuna held your waist tightly the entire time, all while acknowledging the people that greeted him and asked him for signatures. While in his arms, you realized that he was right. Winning or losing on the track didn’t matter because he already had you—and that was his true and greatest victory.
As cringe-worthy as that may sound. 
“I do have a request, though.” Your boyfriend focused his attention back on you, giving your bum a playful squeeze in front of everyone before he moved his face closer to your ear. “Make me feel like a winner in bed tonight.”
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alygator77 · 2 months ago
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ᰔᩚ motherhood and matrimony I ch 6 ᰔᩚ
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ꨄ︎ pairing. au ceo! satoru gojo x single mom secretary fem! reader
ꨄ summary. satoru gojo, the arrogant and irresistible heir to a billion-dollar corporation and the son of your boss, the ceo... but when satoru’s father dies unexpectedly, his inheritance hinges on a stipulation: he must marry and have a child, but the child doesn't necessarily have to be his, right? together, you strike a deal: a fake marriage that promises financial stability for you and corporate control for him. as the lines between business and emotion blur, you must decide if your partnership is purely contractual or if it could evolve into something real.
ꨄ︎ warnings/tags. 18+ MDNI, nsfw, enemies to lovers, opposites attract, fake marriage, slow burn, smut, fluff, bit of angst, reader is single mom who recently broke off her engagement, satoru being a cute step dad, naoya is your crappy ex, some triggers of domestic abuse (emotional abuse but it can be a bit suggestive/interpreted as physical, from naoya not satoru) » 【note, this chapter contains explicit sexual content (dry humping, grinding)】
ꨄ words: 14.4k
ꨄ a/n. hello my lovelies!! :) life has been a roller coaster to say the least, but i'm so excited to share this chapter with ya'll. i'll see you at the bottom with my thoughts ♡
ꨄ taglist: closed (ao3)
♬ playlist
series masterlist ꨄ︎ previous chapter ꨄ︎ next chapter → pending
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ch 6 // drenched in truth
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The gala was a night that promised perfection, elegance and ease…but the storm on the horizon had other plans for you.
As murmurs of conversation hum throughout the grand ballroom, it’s easy to forget the world outside—that is, until you hear the first distant rumble of thunder.
Before you know it, the once clear starry evening, slowly gives way to ominous clouds gathering the horizon, with the first raindrops of the evening arriving barely noticed beneath the layers of music and chatter—tapping against the expansive windows like an impatient guest requesting entry.
But the gentle taps soon evolve into a steady, insistent drumming, making the rain’s presence impossible to ignore as the water streams down the glass windows in rivulets—distorting the view outside and making the world beyond seem distant and blurred.
It’s getting late…
You subtly glance down at your phone to check the time, and as the screen illuminates, a picture of you and Haru at the park flashes across the display. What a bright and sunny memory—completely different from the now impossible to ignore presence of this unforgiving rain.
As the storm outside grows, your thoughts immediately shift to Haru. Is she okay?
The last time there was such a storm, Haru had been terrified of the thunder—each crack making her small frame shake, eyes filled with tears and voice trembling as she whispered mama, seeking comfort in your embrace.
Is the nanny capable of soothing her?
The sudden concern that she might be scared and inconsolable gnaws at you, making it hard to focus on anything else as you navigate the crowd, exchanging pleasantries with people whose names you’ll forget by morning.
The opulence of the gala, the sparkling chandeliers, the elegant music—it all feels suffocating, a gilded cage keeping you from where you truly need to be. Home. That’s where you should be, holding Haru close, comforting her through the storm, not trapped in this endless sea of strangers and small talk.
You glance at Satoru beside you—a picture of calm, hand resting in his pocket as he engages in light-hearted conversation with a group of guests, smiling and laughing. It’s all so natural, so effortless as their chatter seems to exist in a world far removed from the storm—both outside and within you.
As you stand there, nodding along to the conversation without truly listening, your eyes begin to drift across the room and you notice a few other couples discreetly making their way towards the exit, coats draped over their arms—if only you could do the same.
You find yourself fidgeting with the hem of your dress—you really want to go home.
Glancing up at Satoru again, you wait for a brief lull in his conversation where the chatter dies down just enough for you to discreetly speak to him without interrupting.
Once the opportunity arises with the laughter fading and the conversation shifting to another topic, you seize your moment. Leaning in close to Satoru, your shoulder brushes against his arm as you softly whisper under your breath.
“Hey… it’s getting late and with this storm, maybe we should think about heading out soon?”
Your words are careful, quiet, meant to blend into the background noise of the gala so that no one else notices your request, and Satoru’s gaze flickers to you, his expression softening as he takes in your concern. But then he sighs quietly, his hand gently brushing against your arm, a small gesture of reassurance.
“I know,” he murmurs, “but there’s just one more obligation I have to fulfill for the event—a quick thank-you speech to the sponsors. I promise, we’ll leave right after that.”
He begins to turn back to the conversation, the group’s voices already beginning to rise again, but just as he starts to pull away, a low rumble of thunder reverberates through the room, and your gaze instinctively flickers to the windows, where the rain beats against the glass with increasing ferocity, the relentless sheets of water streaking down like tears.
Without thinking, your hand reaches out, lightly touching Satoru’s arm—a small, almost hesitant gesture. As your fingers brush against the fabric of his sleeve, your subtle plea for his attention makes him pause and turn back towards you, concern flickering in his eyes.
“Satoru…I’m really worried about Haru,” you confess, keeping your voice low to avoid drawing the attention of those around you. “She hates storms… she’s terrified of thunder.”
Before you can say more, he shifts slightly, wrapping an arm around your waist and pulling you gently into his side. You are met immediately with the warmth of his body, the subtle scent of his cologne and the steady rhythm of his breath. His hand moves in slow, comforting motions up and down your arm, as if trying to transfer some of his calm to you.
He tilts his chin down towards you and he speaks in a low gentle murmur, meant only for you.
“Haru has the nanny. She’s safe. I’ll make sure she’s okay, and this won’t take long—I’ll be quick, I promise.”
His words, paired with the comforting rhythm of his hand, are meant to ease your worries, to reassure you that everything will be alright, but for some reason they land with a dull thud in your chest.
You know Haru has the nanny…but you can’t shake the feeling that it might not be enough for her. You’ve been Haru’s rock throughout everything—Naoya was never there for her, and she hasn’t had anyone else.
“I know, but…” you glance towards the windows again as another rumble of thunder reverberates through the room. “Haru gets so scared. Last time, she cried for hours and couldn’t sleep without me.”
Satoru’s eyes flicker between you and the group of guests nearby, a momentary glance that betrays the tug-of-war happening within him.
“I get it. I do,” his tone is still gentle but with an edge of urgency now. His eyes lock onto yours, pleading for understanding even as they flit once more to the gathering around you. “This is important, though. I made a commitment to be here, and it’s crucial that I see it through. But I’ll make it quick, I promise. We’ll leave as soon as I’m done, and we’ll be home before you know it.”
A mix of frustration and helplessness begin to bubble through you as you watch his gaze. There is a sense of sincerity, yet it feels divided—part of him here with you, with another part already back in the spotlight, where the murmurs of the gala grow louder.
You know he’s committed to the cause, that his presence here holds weight—it’s not that you don’t understand—it’s just that… does that really matter right now when Haru might need you?
“Alright…” you say reluctantly, the word heavy on your tongue. “Just… don’t take too long, please.”
ꨄ︎
Perhaps this storm isn’t just weather—it’s a harbinger.
Your attention shifts between watching Satoru on stage, giving his speech to the sponsors, to the large windows lining the ballroom. Outside the once vibrant red carpet is now a sodden strip of fabric, abandoned to the elements.
The storm has worsened, intensifying with each passing minute, and with it, your sense of dread. Your fingers tap idly against the polished surface of the round dinner table as the wind howls like it wants to be let in, the rain lashing against the glass with a ferocity that seems malevolent.
You try to focus on Satoru’s words, but a movement out of the corner of your eye catches your attention. A man, tall and imposing with raven hair, weaves his way through the crowd, his presence almost too casual for an event like this. He’s dressed well enough to blend in, but there’s something about him—something in the way he carries himself, the scar upon his lips—he feels out of place.
He's somewhat…intimidating—like a predator stalking its prey.
Once the man approaches your table, you stiffen slightly, instinctively pulling your shawl tighter around your shoulders. He’s close now, close enough that you can make out the sharpness in his features, the cold glint in his eyes.
But…why is there an air of familiarity about him? You can’t quite place it. He stops just short of your chair, a smile curling his lips, though is doesn’t reach his eyes.
“Mind if I sit?” he asks—and he doesn’t wait for your answer before pulling out the chair beside you.
Caught off guard, you nod slowly.
“Sure…”
Settling into the seat with a casual ease there's a small, almost imperceptible smirk playing on his lips. A subtle tension radiates from him as his gaze flickers to you.
“Enjoying the event?” he asks, voice smooth, almost too smooth, like oil on water.
Great. This is really not what you need right now. It’s hard enough playing your part when you have Satoru’s support, but now, you’re by yourself. What if you slip up and say something wrong?
Unease bubbles inside you, making it difficult to muster more than a faint smile upon your lips.
“Yes, it’s been lovely,” you nod politely.
“Mm… quite the storm out there though,” he comments. “But then again, a little chaos never hurt anyone, right?”
His tone sends a cool shiver down your spine. This guy gives you the creeps, but you force a polite smile, unsure of what to make of him.
“I suppose not…”
He leans back in his chair, his gaze shifting to Satoru on stage before flicking back to you.
“You must be proud, seeing him up there,” he remarks. “It’s not every day you get to stand beside someone so… influential.”
His words, though innocuous on the surface, feel laden with meaning—like there’s something he’s not saying, something he’s implying, and you feel a chill that has nothing to do with the storm outside.
Who is this man, and why does he seem so familiar?
He leans in slightly, his voice dropping to a near whisper.
“It’s important to keep an eye on those you care about, wouldn’t you agree? Sometimes… things aren’t always as they seem.”
The statement hangs in the air, heavy with implication, but before you can respond, he straightens up, his gaze flickering to the stage again where Satoru is now wrapping up his speech. The unsettling smile returns to his face—a smile that carries a shadow passing over his expression.
“Well, I won’t keep you,” he stands from the chair. “Enjoy the rest of your evening,” and he turns on his heel, disappearing back into the crowd as quickly as he appeared.
But the chill he leaves behind lingers, gnawing at the edges of your mind.
Weird…what a creep.
You shake off the lingering sense of unease as Satoru beings to step down from the podium, exchanging pleasantries and goodbyes with a few lingering guests.
His eyes flicker to you, and then towards the window, catching a glimpse of lightning as it illuminates the darkened sky, and for just a second, you notice a shift in his expression as he takes in the worsening weather.
Excusing himself from the crowd, Satoru steps to the side discreetly with practiced ease and pulls out his phone. You watch as he dials, his back turned slightly from the attendees, and although you can’t hear his words, you know what he’s doing—a rush of relief washes over you as you realize he’s calling the driver to come pick you up.
Finally.
The thought of being on your way home, of holding Haru close and reassuring her, makes the wait almost unbearable.
Satoru’s conversation is brief, but you watch it with growing anticipation, and once he slips his phone back into his pocket, he meets your gaze from across the room again.
Wait…there is something in his expression…an unease that wasn’t there before. Concern.
He weaves through the crowd with purposeful strides, and your heart sinks—it slowly becomes more apparent that something isn’t right, and the chatter in the ballroom grows quiet as guests murmur about the worsening weather.
Once Satoru reaches you, he doesn’t speak immediately. Instead, he pulls out the seat beside you, flipping it around so that the back of the chair presses against his chest as he sits, arms folded across the top of it. The movement is casual in appearance, but the way his fingers tighten around the wood, his knuckles whitening just slightly, betrays the calm facade he’s trying to maintain.
“So…” he leans in a little closer, voice low, almost reluctant. “We’ve got a bit of a situation.”
“What’s wrong?” anxiety builds inside you.
He hesitates, just for a moment, his eyes flicking to the side as if searching for the right words, before meeting your gaze head-on.
“There’s been an accident on the main road leading out of the city… it’s caused a major blockage, and with all this rain, the roads are practically flooded. My driver’s stuck on the other side and won’t be able to reach us for hours… maybe not until morning.”
Oh, you see red.
The storm outside suddenly feels like a mirror to the one brewing inside you—fierce, relentless, and impossible to contain.
If only you had left sooner, if only Satoru hadn’t insisted on staying for that last part of the gala—if only he had understood the urgency you felt—you wouldn’t be in this mess.
And now, Haru is alone at home, frightened and vulnerable, and you’re stuck here, trapped by circumstances beyond your control.
The thought makes your blood boil.
“So, what do we do?” The words escape your lips with a sharpness that even you didn’t anticipate, cutting through the air like a knife.
Satoru’s eyes widen and he runs a hand through his hair, a rare display of uncertainty flickering across his usually composed demeanor. His eyes shift away from you, scanning the room as if searching for a solution hidden in the lavish surroundings.
“…let me figure this out. Wait here,” he murmurs as he pushes back his chair and stands.
Watching his tall frame cut through the crowd, suddenly the sound of the rain beating against the glass now seems almost accusatory—a relentless reminder of this absurd situation you are now stuck in.
This night suddenly feels like it’s teetering on the edge of disaster—the thin veneer of control slipping from you with each passing second. But there are faces around you, and although they blur into a sea of indifference and hallow chatters, you are acutely aware that people are still watching.
You take a deep breath attempting to calm your frustration. There must be something Satoru can do. He has money and power—there must be some sort of solution he can find to this. Haru needs you.
Suddenly, you catch sight of Satoru weaving his way back towards you, his stride purposeful and his expression carrying a hint of relief. For a brief moment, hope flutters in your chest—perhaps he’s found a way out of this mess.
When he reaches you, he shoves his hands into his pockets, leans in slightly and speaks with a sense of accomplishment.
“So… good news. I spoke with the event coordinator. Given the circumstances, the hotel has offered us one of their VIP suites for the night. It’s just upstairs, fully equipped with everything we need until the roads clear up.”
Yeah…that’s not the solution you wanted.
A suite? He wants you to stay overnight? When Haru is at home, probably terrified, clinging to her blankets with wide, tear-filled eyes? Does he really think that’s what you wanted to hear?
“That’s considerate of them, but what about Haru?”
The words escape your lips before you can temper them, clipped and laced with the sharp edge of your rising aggravation. As they slice through the air, the flicker of surprise that crosses Satoru’s face is immediate.
Fuck.
You’re still in public, at this stupid gala. You have to stay composed; you can’t afford to lose control—not here.
Your eyes scan the room for any prying eyes, anyone who might have caught the slight outburst. It doesn’t seem like anyone noticed… thankfully. The last thing you need is for your moment of panic to become another piece of gossip for the night.
Taking a long deep breath, you attempt to regain some semblance of composure, but as you lower your voice, the tension still coils tight in your words.
“She’s back home, we can’t just leave her alone.”
“But she’s not alone,” he counters, tone firm but gentle. “Haru’s in good hands with the nanny, she’s safe. I’ll make sure everything is handled. I’ll compensate the nanny for staying overnight with Haru.”
He is clearly not on the same page as you—he doesn’t understand. Safe? Maybe. But comforted? No. Compensation won’t calm Haru’s fears; money can’t replace the warmth and reassurance of her mother’s arms when she’s trembling in fear.
But you can’t say that here—you don’t trust yourself to soften the words, not with the eyes of the gala on you, prying, ready to dissect any sign of discord between you and Satoru. So instead, you grasp for something, anything—another solution, another way out of this mess.
“Isn’t there something else we can do? Another route we can take?” you press, the desperation seeping through despite your efforts to keep it contained.
Satoru’s shoulders tense ever so slightly, a subtle shift that only someone who knows him as well as you do would notice. There is a flicker of frustration in his eyes as they narrow, and you watch him take a moment to briefly weigh his words.
“Y/n this is the best solution I can come up with,” there’s an undercurrent of firmness that brooks no argument. “It’s not safe for us to leave right now. The roads are flooded, and I can’t risk us getting caught out there.”
For a moment, the two of you are locked in a silent standoff, each of you grappling with the weight of the situation, the reality pressing down like the storm outside. He’s right—you know he is—but that doesn’t make the situation any easier to swallow. The knowledge sits heavy in your chest, a bitter pill that refuses to go down smoothly.
Why couldn’t Satoru just listen to you when you suggested you leave early?
The thought fuels your frustration simmering just beneath the surface. You should have been more persistent. But now, here you are, trapped in this gilded cage while your daughter is home, scared and needing you.
Satoru exhales softly, the tension in his shoulders easing and the hard edges of his demeanor softening just slightly as he steps closer to you—he’s trying to bridge the growing chasm between you.
His hand reaches out, and you want to pull back, but you are in public, you can’t. There’s a softness in his touch, a quiet desperation to connect, but you can feel the gap widening under the weight of everything left unsaid.
He tilts his head, caressing your hand as his gaze searches yours.
“It’s just one night,” he murmurs, and there’s a tenderness there, an unspoken plea for you to understand, to see that he’s trying to make the best of a bad situation. But to you, the words feel hollow, like they’re echoing in a void that’s too vast to bridge with simple reassurances. “We’ll be back first thing in the morning before Haru even wakes up.”
But will she be okay?
The question burns in your throat but you keep it to yourself—it wouldn’t come out nice anyway.
You are trapped—trapped by the storm, trapped by this situation, trapped by the need to maintain this perfect, unblemished image for everyone around you.
So instead, you force a tight-lipped smile, one that doesn’t reach your eyes. It’s the best you can manage, a fragile mask to hide the storm inside.
“Guess we don’t have a choice….”
“I know…we’ll get through this though. Just one night,” he echoes, as if saying it again will make it more true, but the repetition feels like an empty promise.
You nod, the motion stiff and reluctant.
“I understand,” the words taste like ash. “Let’s go upstairs then,” you rise from your seat, not waiting for him to respond.
ꨄ︎
As the elevator doors slide open with a quiet ding, you step inside with clipped precision, your movements sharp and purposeful. The elevator is empty—thank God.
The last thing you need right now is to plaster on a fake smile and pretend that everything is fine when you’re anything but. You don’t have the energy to pretend—not in front of strangers, and certainly not in front of Satoru.
You barely acknowledge him as he steps in behind you, your focus narrowing on the glowing buttons as you swiftly press the number for your floor. Once the door closes with a soft thud, instinctively, you gravitate to the far side of the elevator, creating as much distance between you and Satoru as the small space allows.
There’s a brief pause as Satoru hesitates, his eyes flickering over to you before he pulls out his phone, and the soft glow of the screen casts a muted light over his features, highlighting the tension in his brow.
As the elevator hums quietly, beginning its ascent, you catch sight of Satoru dialing the nanny’s number from the corner of your eye, lifting the phone to his ear.
“Hey, listen… there’s been a situation with the roads—they’re flooded, and we won’t be able to make it back tonight. Can you stay with Haru until morning?”
He pauses, listening intently to the nanny’s response, and although you can’t make out her words, you see the way Satoru's brow furrows, the lines of tension etching themselves deeper into his features.
The muffled sound of the nanny’s voice filters through the phone, indistinct and far away—until another sound reaches your ears, clear and unmistakable.
Haru.
Her small, trembling voice carries through the phone, quivering with fear as she calls for you, confirming the gnawing dread that had been eating away at you all night. You were right, of course, but there’s no satisfaction in that—not when your daughter is scared and crying for you, and you’re trapped miles away, helpless to do anything about it.
Satoru’s jaw tightens. “Haru’s okay, right?” tone softer now, almost hesitant.
There’s a pause, a heavy silence that stretches out as Satoru listens, and you watch as something in his posture shifts—his shoulders slump ever so slightly, a small, almost imperceptible movement, but enough to tell you that the news isn’t good. He closes his eyes for a moment, exhaling quietly.
“Tell her that her Mama will be home in the morning… and I’ll make sure everything’s okay. Just... stay with her, please.”
Slipping his phone back into his pocket, Satoru fixes his gaze on the floor, unable—or perhaps unwilling—to meet your eyes. He offers no words of comfort, no apology. And you, in turn, make no effort to break the silence either.
Maybe it’s for the best—because right now, the storm raging inside you is just as fierce as the one outside, and you’re not sure you can contain it much longer. The lid holding down your frustration is teetering dangerously on the edge, threatening to spill over, and as the pressure builds, your emotions coil tight like a spring ready to snap.
If you open your mouth now, the floodgates will burst.
So, you’ll wait—you’ll discuss this with Satoru when you’re more level-headed. Right now, all you want to do is crawl into bed—away from Satoru, away from this night, away from everything that feels so suffocatingly wrong.
The silence stretches on, thick and unbearable, and once the elevator finally reaches your floor with a soft chime, without a word, you step out, your heels clicking against the polished floor, with Satoru following a step behind—silent and distant, the space between you feeling wider than ever.
ꨄ︎
The moment you step into the VIP suite, the first thing that strikes you is the sheer size of the room—it’s more like a luxurious apartment than a mere hotel room. The high ceilings are adorned with intricate chandeliers, rich furnishings and artwork that probably costs more than what your entire apartment had cost.
The floor-to-ceiling windows offer a breathtaking view of the city below, and there is a beautiful patio overlooking the city with the lights twinkling against the stormy backdrop, but instead of feeling awe, it’s only a reminder of how trapped you are.
In the common room, a plush, oversized sofa commands the space, flanked by elegant armchairs and a coffee table that looks more like a piece of art than something meant for everyday use. You set your purse and shawl down on the polished surface and begin to explore the room.
Your gaze wanders to a nearby dining area, where a table is set for two, the fine china and crystal glasses gleaming under the soft light. Beyond that, a sleek bar catches your eye, stocked with an assortment of premium spirits. At the center, a bottle of champagne chills in a gleaming silver bucket, waiting to be uncorked—a celebration you’re far from feeling.
Curious, you open the first door you come across, but it’s just a closet. Moving onto the next, you’re half-expecting to find a bedroom, but instead, the door reveals a marble-clad bathroom, which is more of a private spa than anything else, with a deep soaking tub and a rain shower that beckons with promises of relaxation.
Finally, you reach the last door, and as you push it open, your breath catches in your throat. The bedroom is vast, with high ceilings and draped curtains, but amidst all the space, the luxury, the sheer grandeur…
There is only one bed.
It’s massive, adorned in rich, inviting linens that seem to promise the best sleep of your life. The headboard is a work of art, appearing as if it was carved by hand, its craftsmanship impeccable. But despite all its luxury, one glaring fact stands out—it’s a single bed.
A bed meant for two.
You stop in your tracks, staring at the bed in disbelief. Your mind races, trying to make sense of the situation. Did you miss a door? Could there be another bedroom somewhere in the suite?
Without thinking, you begin to backtrack, your footsteps hurried and purposeful. You retrace your steps through the suite, opening doors you’ve already been through, peering inside with a growing sense of urgency.
The bathroom—no, just the spa-like marble bath and rain shower. The closet—no, just storage. The living area—no, just the oversized sofa and elegant chairs. The dining area—no, just the table set for two and the sleek bar.
Where’s the other bedroom? There has to be another one, right? How can a suite this big, only have one bed?
Is this a cruel joke? A final twist of the knife in an already unbearable night? Is the universe pushing you further out of your comfort zone, testing the limits of your patience, your composure, and your control?
Your movements grow more frantic as you circle back, convinced you must have overlooked something, anything. But there’s nothing else. It’s just that one, luxurious bed, waiting for the two of you.
Scanning the suite one last time, you notice Satoru sitting nonchalantly on the plush couch, leaning back with one arm draped casually over the back of the sofa. He loosens his tie as he tilts his head, watching you with a mixture of confusion and mild amusement.
“What are you looking for?”
You stop dead in your tracks, your breath hitching as you stare at him in disbelief.
“There’s only one bed.”
Perhaps vocalizing the absurdity of this precarious situation might somehow conjure a second bed out of thin air.
Oh, you wish.
Satoru blinks and raises an eyebrow. Without a word, he slowly rises from the couch and walks towards the bedroom. Once he steps inside, he takes in the sight of the massive bed and the luxurious linens—staring at it for a moment as the situation sits in.
Then, he turns to you, with an exaggerated shrug.
“Huh. Looks like the hotel’s playing matchmaker tonight.”
You narrow your eyes at him, not speaking, letting the flicker of annoyance smolder into a flame. The corners of your mouth tighten, and your arms cross defensively over your chest.
Satoru matches your silence, watching you with an unreadable expression, and then he shrugs again, the movement casual, almost dismissive.
“What?” carrying a note of faux innocence. “They probably figured we wouldn’t mind getting cozy. We are husband and wife, after all. Of course they wouldn’t think we’d need separate beds.”
He’s not making this any better for you right now…
You shake your head, rubbing your eyes in exasperation as if trying to rub away the absurdity of the situation. It’s all too much—the storm, the delay, the night that refuses to end. You can feel the weight of it pressing down on you, and each word from Satoru just seems to add another layer to the frustration.
“Wow…this is unbelievable,” you huff.
“Mm, you know what they say, nothing like sharing a bed to break the tension,” Satoru quips, plopping down at the edge of the bed as if it’s the most natural thing in the world. He bounces slightly, testing the mattress, and glances up at you with a glint in his eye. “Well, I suppose this is where we’re supposed to start arguing over who gets the left side?”
Is he serious right now?
You can hardly believe it—the casualness of his demeanor, the way he seems completely unconcerned about the reality of this situation. It is almost infuriating.
“This is not happening…I am not sharing a bed with you,” you say, more to yourself than to him, a whispered mix of disbelief and determination. You cross your arms tightly over your chest.
But Satoru just leans back on his hands, completely unbothered, his relaxed posture a stark contrast to the storm brewing inside you. Tilting his head slightly, he flashes you an easy grin.
“Hey, it could be worse,” he says with a nonchalant shrug, patting the space beside him. “At least it’s a king-size. I mean, we could practically build a wall down the middle if you want.”
You stare at him, incredulous.
How can he be so flippant about this? So completely unconcerned, so utterly unaffected by everything that’s happened tonight?
Every word that comes out of his mouth further makes your patience slip through your fingers.
“…are you serious right now?” there is a tremble in your voice as you attempt to keep your frustration in check, but it’s a losing battle.
“Yup,” he shrugs, completely unfazed. “Looks like it’s just you, me, and this king-sized dilemma.”
Wow. You’re standing in the middle of a situation that has gone from bad to worse, and he’s making jokes? The disbelief turns into something hotter, something sharper, as you feel the last remnants of your composure start to crumble.
“Are you kidding me, Satoru?” you snap and the frustration you’ve been holding back all night finally spills over. “You are absolutely unbelievable. This isn’t funny! None of this is fucking funny! We’re stuck here, and you’re making jokes?”
The playful smirk that had been dancing on Satoru's lips vanishes instantly, replaced by a look of irritation. He leans forward, fixing you with a hard stare, and the lightheartedness drains from his posture as his elbows rest on his knees.
“Oh, okay, I’m sorry,” he retorts, a sharp edge to his voice. “Y’know, I was just trying to lighten the mood. Didn’t realize you were going to blow up at me for trying to make the best out of a bad situation.”
“Lighten the mood?” you echo, your voice rising in disbelief. “Do you really think that’s what I need right now?”
A scoff escapes your lips as all your frustration bubbles to the surface. The weight of everything finally presses down on you, and his indifference feels like a slap in the face.
You can’t even look at him right now.
With a dismissive shake of your head, you turn away, briskly stepping towards the living room.
“You just don’t get it, do you?” you mutter under your breath, the words more to yourself than to him, but loud enough that you know he can hear.
“What don’t I get?” Satoru challenges, his voice growing sharper as he pushes off the bed and follows after you. His footsteps are clipped as he closes the distance between you, not willing to let the conversation drop. “What don’t I get, y/n? Tell me.”
You whirl around to face him, your heart pounding in your chest, the tension crackling like electricity.
“Satoru—Haru needs me, and we’re stuck here, miles away, in some fancy hotel suite. But you don’t even care.”
The accusation slips out and you can no longer hide the mix of anger and hurt that laces your voice. Satoru’s eyes narrow, his jaw clenching as he tries to rein in his own frustration.
“You think I don’t care?” his voice is sharp, insistent, almost incredulous as he steps closer. “You think I’m not worried about Haru too? y/n we literally had this conversation in the limo earlier. Jesus, just because I don’t show my emotions like you it doesn’t mean I don’t care. I hate this situation just as much as you do, but it’s not like I can control the weather or the roads!”
The intensity of his words strikes you, but the anger simmering beneath your skin refuses to let you back down.
“Yeah, well, if you really cared, we would have left as soon as the storm started, like I wanted! Then we wouldn’t even be in this situation!” your trembling voice increases an octave and you throw your hands up in exasperation. “But no—you had to stay for that last part of the gala, didn’t you?”
Satoru’s reaction is immediate. He runs a hand through his hair, the movement rough and frustrated while a bitter laugh escapes his lips, one that sends a chill down your spine. His eyes flash with something darker as he glares at you.
“Oh, so now it’s my fault that we’re stuck here? Because I stayed for the speech? I had obligations, y/n! I couldn’t just leave!”
“Obligations?” the word drips with sarcasm as it leaves your lips, your voice thick with disbelief and a touch of something more, something wounded. You narrow your eyes and the anger within flares hotter as you shoot a glare back at him. “We could’ve left earlier, but instead you just had to be the perfect ‘Satoru Gojo.’ Your precious image, your obligations—everything always comes first, doesn’t it?”
A flash of anger sparks within the depths of Satoru’s eyes, and his voice drops lower, more measured, with an edge that makes your heart jump.
“You knew what you were signing up for,” the words are clipped and his tone is cold and biting. “I told you there would be expectations, that there would be obligations that came with this agreement. Don’t act like this is some surprise to you.”
His words hit their mark, the truth in them sinking in like a stone dropping into a deep well. The realization settles over you, heavy and cold.
Oh…this truly is just a business arrangement, nothing more.
This is…what you agreed to…isn’t it?
For a brief moment, you had almost forgotten that this marriage—this life you’ve been trying to build—wasn’t real. It was never based on love or trust or any of the things you’d once dreamed of. It has always been a contract, an arrangement, and you were just another piece in the game he was playing.
You feel the sharp, unmistakable sting of hurt, a wound that cuts deeper than you anticipated. And with that hurt comes regret—regret for allowing yourself to believe, even for a second, that he might be willing to take a leap of faith for you, for Haru.
You should have known better.
He’s Satoru Gojo, after all, the man who holds his obligations and his image above everything else. The man who never allows himself to be vulnerable, to be anything other than perfect in the eyes of the world.
“So that’s it, then?” the words slip out with a quiet tremor, your voice breaking slightly under the crushing weight of your emotions “You’ll always put your commitments first, no matter what? No matter how it affects us? No matter how it affects Haru?”
For the briefest of moments, Satoru’s expression softens, a flicker of regret passing through his eyes, as if he’s momentarily aware of the pain his words have caused.
You can feel the tears burning at the back of your eyes, but you blink them away, refusing to let them fall. You won’t give him the satisfaction of seeing how much his words have cut you, how deeply the reminder of your place in his life stings.
Instead, you draw in a shaky breath, steeling yourself, and forcing your voice to steady. It takes every ounce of strength you have to keep your composure, to keep from breaking in front of him.
“It’s always about your image…isn’t it?” you whisper, the words barely audible, but they carry the weight of your realization, heavy and bitter. “I thought… maybe just once, you’d be willing to choose something else. Someone else. Guess I was wrong.”
The silence that follows is suffocating, thick with the tension that has built up between you. Satoru opens his mouth to respond, his expression shifting as if he’s searching for the right words, but you’ve already had enough. The frustration, the anger, the hurt—it’s all too much, too overwhelming, and honestly, you don’t think you can take the weight of his inevitable rejection right now.
Before he can say anything, before he can shatter whatever fragile composure you have left, you turn on your heel and stride towards the suite’s balcony.
ꨄ︎
The moment you step out onto the balcony, the cold night air wraps around you, but you welcome its icy embrace, and as the heavy door slides shut behind you with a dull thud, it seals off any lingering warmth from the hotel suite, leaving you alone with the elements.
The balcony, partially sheltered by a gazebo, offers little protection from the fierce wind driving the rain sideways. But as the droplets hit your skin, cold and sharp, you don’t flinch. Instead, you let the rain wash over you, soaking into your dress and chilling you to the bone, as if the cold might somehow numb the emotional turmoil raging inside you.
Gripping the railing, you stare out at the city below, the wind whipping around you, tugging at your dress as the storm batters you from all sides. But the physical discomfort barely registers—it's nothing compared to the storm brewing within. Because now, the anger that had fueled your argument with Satoru begins to ebb, giving way to a deep, aching sadness that you can no longer hold back.
You sink down onto one of the chairs, ignoring the fact that the cushion is already soaked through. The wet fabric clings to your skin as you huddle there, pulling your knees up to your chest, and as you take in the downpour, you allow the rain to mingle with the tears that finally begin to slip down your cheeks.
If only the howling wind was loud enough to drown the thoughts swirling in your mind.
But it’s not.
The first thing you hear is Naoya’s words, echoing in your ears. His cruel taunts, sharp and insidious, have haunted you ever since your encounter at the coffee shop—a seed of doubt planted deep within you.
And now, those seeds have taken root, growing in the shadows of your heart, feeding off your insecurities until they’ve become impossible to ignore. Maybe he was right all along… you don’t belong beside Satoru. This life you agreed to—this carefully crafted facade—it has always been a deal, nothing more. A deal struck for reasons that now seem distant and blurred.
And then there’s Satoru.
The man you’ve grown closer to, despite everything. The man who, on occasion, looks at you with a softness that seems almost out of place, a trust that makes your heart ache under the weight of your own secrets… and your own growing feelings. But tonight, you saw the bitter reality of who he truly is—a reality that you’ve always known, yet somehow tried to push aside. It’s a reality that places duty and obligation above all else, that keeps his heart locked away behind walls you know you’ll never breach.
You understand it, you really do. But understanding doesn’t make it any easier to bear. It doesn’t make the hurt go away.
You think about Haru—your sweet, innocent child, who’s at home right now, likely scared and alone, flinching with every crash of thunder.
The thought of her, small and frightened, tugs at your heart, and the guilt twists inside you, sharper than any blade. It cuts through your defenses until all that remains is the raw, unrelenting pain of a mother’s worry, a mother’s fear. You should be there with her, holding her close, whispering reassurances that everything is going to be okay, that the storm will pass.
But you’re not.
You’re here, drenched on a balcony, struggling to hold yourself together while everything around you falls apart. And that reality—knowing you’ve left her to face the storm alone—makes the tears fall harder now.
They stream down your face, mixing with the rain, until you can’t tell where one ends and the other begins. The sobs come, wracking your body with their intensity, as you bury your face in your hands, your shoulders shaking with the force of your grief.
It’s all too much—the pressure, the expectations, the lies, the fear.
And then there’s the love.
The love that’s beginning to bloom for Satoru, despite the circumstances…and it only makes it more complicated, more painful. It’s a love that you know you shouldn’t feel, that you’re terrified to acknowledge—and it wraps itself around your heart like a thorny vine, beautiful yet painful, tightening its grip with every passing day.
And your worries never end—the contract, the obligations, the appearances you have to maintain. This agreement that had once seemed so clear, so necessary, but now feels like a chain around your neck, binding you to a life that’s growing more and more suffocating by the day.
You didn’t sign up for this, not really.
You didn’t sign up for the way your heart had started to beat in sync with Satoru’s, for the way his touch lingers on your skin long after he’s gone, or the way his voice is capable of soothing the deepest parts of your soul.
But here you are—trapped, ensnared by duty and honor, by a love that’s growing despite the walls you’ve tried to build around it. A love for a man who might never fully understand the depth of the sacrifice you’re making.
A man who will never love you back the way you wish he would, or put you first.
You continue to cry as the storm proceeds to rage against you, both inside and out—but you hope that maybe this rain will wash away some of the pain, some of the doubts, some of the fear.
Ah… but you know better. Because once this storm passes, the reality of your situation will still be there, waiting for you.
The contract, the expectations, the life you’ve chosen, and the choices you must make—none of it will disappear, no matter how much you wish it could. And despite how much you long to rid yourself of this burden, the love you’re beginning to feel for Satoru…that too, will remain, complicating everything in ways you’re not sure you’re ready to face.
The sound of the sliding door opening barely registers in your mind, lost in the cacophony of the storm as you remain huddled on the chair, lost in your thoughts. You don’t look up, not even when you sense his presence behind you—the presence of that familiar warmth, one that has the potential to cut through the cold that’s seeped into your bones.
Why is he here? You can’t bear it.
He stands there for a moment, silently taking in the sight of you curled up on the chair, small and vulnerable against the fury of the storm, and then, with a resolve that seems almost fragile, he steps forward.
The rain immediately begins to soak through his clothes, just as it did yours, and slowly, he kneels beside you, his movements careful, almost hesitant, as if he’s afraid that any sudden motion might shatter what little composure you have left.
“y/n,” he says softly, voice almost lost in the storm, “I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry.”
You can’t bring yourself to respond—the words are trapped in your throat, tangled in the rush of emotions his apology stirs within you. Confusion, sorrow, a desperate yearning for things to be different—they all swirl within you, too intense, too raw to process.
The pain is overwhelming, and right now, you can’t even bring yourself to look at him. You’re terrified of what you might see in his eyes. What would you feel if you looked at him now?
You’re too scared to find out.
Satoru seems to sense your hesitation, your fear. His hand reaches out, and you feel the gentle pressure of his fingers on your shoulder, tentative and light, as if he’s afraid you might pull away. But you don’t. There’s a warmth in his touch, something that defies the cold rain soaking through both of you—a warmth that, despite everything, makes you want to lean into it, to draw strength from it.
“y/n, please…” his voice drops quieter, almost pleading. “Look at me.”
His request hangs in the air, and for a moment, you feel as if time has stopped.
Why is this so hard? Why can’t you accept that this is nothing more than a contract, an arrangement born out of necessity rather than love?
His touch fills you with a bittersweetness that is almost unbearable—a longing that you know is not realistic, that you know you shouldn’t entertain. But the plea in his voice, the vulnerability you hear in those simple words, chips away at your resolve.
Slowly, almost reluctantly, you lift your tear-streaked face to meet his gaze. The rain has flattened his usually neat hair against his forehead, and his clothes are drenched, clinging to him, but it’s his eyes that hold you captive. Because once your eyes finally connect, the world around you seems to fade into the background, the storm reduced to a distant hum.
His usually composed, confident expression is different now—eyes, softened by regret, vulnerability, and that same softness that has been tearing you apart since the moment he became deeply intertwined in your life.
It's that same softness you’ve tried to ignore, that you’ve convinced yourself was nothing more than an illusion, but that still holds an undeniable power over you.
“I’m sorry…” he repeats, voice trembling with an underlying thickness, as if he’s struggling to keep his emotions in check. “I didn’t mean for it to be like this. I never wanted to make you feel like Haru doesn’t matter to me, like you don’t matter.”
Your head shakes almost involuntarily, tears continuing to fall, mingling with the rain. Denial wraps around your heart like a protective shield, reminding you that this man doesn’t love you, that you cannot—will not—get your hopes up. You’ve been down this road before, and you know better than to believe in things that aren’t real.
But Satoru’s eyes soften even more as he reads the pain in your expression, and without a word, his other hand comes up to cup your cheek. His touch is warm against your cold, rain-soaked skin, and he gently brushes away the tears that mingle with the rain on your face—a touch so tender that it almost breaks you all over again.
“I really fucked up tonight…” he sighs, his breath hitching slightly as the words escape him. “I’m so sorry for that. Please… let me make things right.”
You can feel the conflict within you, your heart warring with your mind, urging you to push him away, to protect yourself from the pain that seems inevitable. You can’t afford to give yourself hope—not when the risk of being shattered again looms so large, so close.
“Look… I’m really not good at this. I’m not used to… letting people in,” he admits, his voice faltering slightly as he grapples with his own vulnerability and inadequacy. “But with you, I want to try. That’s why…”
He pauses, taking a deep breath, the sound shaky as he gathers the courage to say what’s weighing on his heart.
“I need you to know that everything I said during the interview tonight… it wasn’t just for show. I wasn’t saying what I thought people wanted to hear.”
Your breath catches at his words and your heart pounds furiously within your chest. The weight of his words and the sincerity in his eyes makes it impossible to look away.
“Those were my real feelings, y/n. When they asked me what drew me to you… I meant every word.”
Your body begins to tremble, a shuddering wave of emotion crashing over you like the relentless storm around you, threatening to pull you under. The tears begin welling up again and you feel yourself unraveling at the seams.
“Don’t do this, Satoru,” you plead, voice cracking with the weight of your fear. You bring your hands up instinctively, as if to shield yourself from the intensity of his words, to create some distance between you. “Don’t say these things… I can’t… I can’t handle being hurt again.”
For a moment, Satoru hesitates, his eyes searching yours, but then, with a gentle yet determined motion, he takes your trembling hands into his own and the warmth of his touch seeps into your cold skin. Slowly, he lowers your hands onto your lap, his grip firm but tender.
“No, let me say this,” he insists, his voice steadying, becoming more resolute, though it’s still laced with a gentleness. “You deserve to hear it. You deserve to know how I really feel.”
His thumb begins to stroke the back of your hand and his gaze softens as he searches your face. There is an earnest tenderness within the depths of his expression, and it makes your heart ache.
“You’ve brought something into my life that I didn’t even know I was missing,” Satoru continues, “You’ve made me feel… grounded, in a way that I’ve never felt before.”
There is a raw honesty in his eyes, one that begins to erode the walls you’ve built around your heart. You feel your resolve crumbling, piece by piece, as his words chip away at the fear and doubt that has kept you from fully opening up to him.
“I’m not perfect,” his voice wavers slightly and his hand tightens around yours, seeking reassurance even as he offers it. “Far from it… but you’ve made me realize that’s okay. And now, because of you, I want to do better, to be better… not just for you, but for Haru too. And for myself.”
What is he saying?
Your breath hitches, a small, involuntary gasp escaping your lips as you process his words.
“I’m… confused,” you whisper, your mind racing to catch up with your heart. “Isn’t this… just a contract?”
“Yeah…well…” a wry smile tugs at the corner of his lips, though his eyes remain serious. “Guess I broke the clause, huh? So much for no emotional entanglements…”
Your breath catches again, this time in realization.
Wait… he feels the same way? This is really happening?
The realization hits you like a wave—the truth of it crashing over you, leaving you breathless, and you can’t stop the fresh surge of tears from falling down your face.
Satoru’s brow furrows with worry, a flicker of uncertainty crossing his features as he watches you cry. Leaning in closer, he rests his forehead gently against yours. His eyes search yours, desperate for some kind of response, some kind of reassurance that his words have reached you, that he hasn’t misread the situation.
“Please… don’t cry,” he whispers with a tenderness that makes your heart ache. He closes his eyes, breath warm as it fans across your face, and his hand, still holding yours, gives a gentle squeeze, as if to remind you that he’s here, that he’s not going anywhere.
“I… I want to believe you, Satoru,” you manage, voice trembling with the weight of your fears and doubts. “Believe everything you’re saying, but I’m so scared. What if I’m not enough? I don’t think I could survive that kind of heartbreak again…”
Satoru’s eyes open slowly, his gaze locking onto yours with an intensity that makes your breath hitch.
“You are enough, y/n. You’ve always been enough.”
There is a firmness in his resolve, as if he’s trying to engrave the words into your very being.
His free hand comes up to cup your cheek, his thumb brushing away another tear that had escaped.
“And honestly… I’m scared too.” His voice drops even lower, almost a whisper now. “Trust is something I’ve never given lightly. But with you… I want to trust. I need to trust. And… I need you to trust me too.”
Trust—there’s that word again.
It lingers in the air between you, heavy with meaning, with all the complexities and the promises it holds.
Trust—It’s such a simple word, yet it carries the weight of a thousand unsaid things, a thousand fears, a thousand hopes. It’s the foundation of everything, isn’t it? The one thing you’ve always struggled with, the one thing that has kept you from fully letting go, from fully giving yourself to him—or to anyone, for that matter.
Trust—It’s what you’ve been afraid to place in someone else’s hands, for fear that they might not handle it with care. And why would they? After everything you’ve been through, after all the disappointments, the betrayals, the moments when you’ve been left to pick up the pieces of your shattered heart, why would you ever trust again?
But… maybe trust isn’t about being certain, about knowing for sure that everything will turn out alright. Maybe… it’s about taking that leap of faith, about being willing to risk the hurt because the potential for something real, something meaningful, is worth it.
You look at him, really look at him—his usually confident demeanor is stripped away, leaving only the man beneath, exposed and uncertain, yet somehow more real than you’ve ever seen him.
This is… Satoru.
In that moment, something shifts within you.
Ah… perhaps trust isn’t something you just give; it’s something you build, together, piece by piece, moment by moment. And maybe… as terrifying as it is, you’re ready to start building that with him.
The realization hits you like a warm rush, spreading through your chest and making your heart ache in a way that’s both painful and beautiful. You want to tell him, to find the words that will let him know that you want this too. But the emotions are too overwhelming, too all-consuming, and you find yourself at a loss, unable to articulate the flood of feelings coursing through you.
So instead, you do the only thing you can—you decide to show him.
Your hands move on their own, driven by an urgency you can’t contain. Grasping the collar of his shirt, your fingers curl into the wet fabric, pulling him closer with a force that leaves no room for hesitation. The distance between you disappears in one desperate, crashing motion as you bring your lips to his.
It’s a fierce kiss, filled with a force that’s as much an admission as it is an apology—an admission of your own feelings, of the vulnerabilities you’ve tried so hard to hide, and an apology for every moment you’ve tried to protect yourself by pushing him away.
The intensity of your need is met by Satoru’s immediate response, his arms wrapping around you with a fervency that matches the storm raging around you, pulling you flush against him as if he’s afraid you might slip away.
The rain soaks through your clothes, but all you can focus on is the heat of his skin, the way his mouth moves against yours with a need that’s as insistent as it is consuming. You swallow the low, desperate moan that escapes from him, the sound vibrating through you, sending a shiver down your spine.
God, you wanted this.
His tongue grazes your lower lip, seeking entry, and without hesitation, you part your lips for him, allowing him to deepen the kiss even further, kissing you as though you’re the very air he needs to breathe. Once his tongue meets yours, the sensation is electric, sending sparks of pleasure through your entire body.
God, he wanted this.
He’s losing himself in the kiss, like he’s been holding back for far too long, and now that he’s tasted you, he can’t get enough. And you let him, wrapping your legs around him and allowing him to lift you up with ease as you thread your fingers through his damp hair. He doesn’t hesitate, doesn’t falter, as he carries you toward the balcony door, sure and driven by a need that can no longer be contained.
With a swift motion, he presses you against the glass door. The cold rain continues to hammer down, but you’re barely aware of it—there is a fire that seems to burn hotter with every second your lips remain locked, and you are lost in the sensation of his hands gripping into the plush of your thighs, holding you firmly in place.
“Satoru…” you gasp between kisses, and the sound of your breathless voice drives him further into the depths of his desire.
“Fuck… could get used to hearing you say m’ name like that,” he groans, mouth dropping to your neck, lips tracing the line of your jaw before pressing hot, open-mouthed kisses against your throat.
You arch your back and tilt your head, allowing him access, but the sudden sensation of his hips pressing against your core causes a whimper to escape your lips.
Fuck. You now realize just how much he wanted this. The hardness pressed against you is unmistakable and that alone heightens your own desire, making a tingling heat begin to pool in between your legs.
Your hands slide down his back, nails digging slightly into his skin beneath the wet fabric of his shirt, and you press your hips forward, seeking more of that friction, and he responds with a low growl rumbling from deep within his chest as he begins to grind against you.
“Fucking hell…” he rasps, voice thick with desperation, “you have no idea,” he whimpers, breath hitching as his lips brush against your ear, “no fucking idea…” he grinds harder, with renewed intensity, “how much I’ve wanted this…” his eyes flutter shut, lost in the sensation, “how much I want you…”
Every nerve ignites as an intense heat courses through you.
Fuck. This is bad. This is really bad.
You’re losing any trace of reasoning; you’re lacking any semblance of control. How can you think straight when he talks to you like that? When he touches you like this?
You can’t. It’s impossible.
This is moving really fast, and every coherent thought is slipping away, replaced by the overwhelming need for him, the need to feel every inch of him against you, inside you. You’re losing yourself in the way his body moves against yours, in the way his voice trembles with need.
“Satoru… I—” you start, but the words catch in your throat, choked off by that delicious sensation of him shifting his hips, pressing harder against you in just that right spot. “I can’t… fuck. I can’t think when you’re like this…”
“Don’t think,” he murmurs against your skin. “Just feel… let me take care of you…”
And then he’s kissing you again, his mouth claiming yours with a hunger that makes your head spin. Oh, fuck it, you don’t care. You don’t care about anything else in this moment.
In one swift motion, without breaking the kiss, he carries you away from the rain, and into the warmth of the suite. His steps are quick and determined until he reaches the bedroom, and once he sets you down your feet barely touch the floor before his hands are on you again.
The urgency in his touch is undeniable, frantic as his hands begin to work at the wet fabric of your dress, peeling it away with determination.
Oh god, this is really moving fast.
The realization hits you like a wave, but it’s quickly drowned out by the sight of him shrugging off his shirt, letting it fall to the floor. And once you catch sight of his toned muscles, the way they flex beneath his skin, how can you think straight?
You can’t.
Your hands move instinctively, reaching for him, running over his chest, savoring the warmth, the strength beneath your fingertips, and his hands are equally on you, exploring your body with a reverence while his mouth moves against yours with fervor.
“You’re so fucking pretty, so beautiful…” he breaks the kiss, “I can’t get enough of you…” and then his mouth is on yours again, desperate and hungry, leaving you breathless.
He guides you towards the bed, and once the back of your knees hit the edge of it, he gives you a gentle but insistent push. His body follows and once the mattress dips slightly under your combined weight, you’re suddenly hyperaware of everything—the way his hands are sliding down your sides, the way his lips are tracing a path from your collarbone to the swell of your breasts, the way he settles between your legs.
This is moving way…way too fast.
You need a moment to think, but your mind is constantly drowned out by the feel of his body against yours.
“Satoru…” you murmur against his lips, “Please I—” But before you can finish, he’s kissing you again, his mouth claiming yours with a fierceness that makes your heart skip a beat.
Your breath hitches as he begins to rock his hips against your clothed core, the friction sending jolts of pleasure through you while you gasp into his mouth. Before you realize what you’re doing, your legs are wrapping around his waist, pulling him closer, deepening the connection between you.
Damnit, that delicious friction is all-consuming, and you can’t stop yourself from arching into him.
“Ever since that night at the gala…” he murmurs against your skin, his lips trailing down the curve of your neck, “After we kissed, I haven’t been able to think about anything else… anyone else… just you.”
His words send a shiver down your spine. Fucking hell, he’s not making this easy. The way his breath hitches as he presses kisses along your collarbone, it’s clear he’s barely holding on to his own control. And you? You’re already starting to lose yours.
Fuck, he will ruin you.
“All I could think about was how it felt to kiss you… how much I wanted to do it again… how much I wanted more…” his breath hot against your skin as his hands grip your hips, pulling you even closer.
“I can’t… I need… oh god…” the words slip out, a desperate plea mixed with a moan as the sensation of him rolling his length against that sensitive bundle of nerves between your legs becomes almost unbearable.
Fuck… the pleasure is so intense, so overwhelming, that your vision blurs, your world narrowing to nothing but the feel of him, the heat of his body, the way he’s moving against you.
You’re seeing stars.
“What is it?” he whispers against the shell of your ear, and oh he sounds so fucking undone by you, as if he’s on the verge of losing control. “Tell me… tell me what you need baby.”
His words are like gasoline on the fire burning inside you. Damnit, you need him. But you also need time to process everything that is happening. As much as you want to give in, as much as your body is screaming for more of him, a tiny voice in the back of your mind is telling you to slow down, to think.
There is still so much that has been left unsaid…things you need to get off your chest.
“Satoru…” you whisper, your voice shaky as you thread your fingers through his hair, gently pulling him back just enough to look into his eyes. His gaze is intense, dark with desire, and it takes every ounce of your self-control not to lose yourself in it. “Can we… can we take it slow?”
His body stills, and for a moment, the intensity in his eyes softens. He’s still breathing heavily, his chest rising and falling, but he nods slowly, as if he’s trying to rein in his own overwhelming need.
He leans in to press a soft, lingering kiss to your lips, his hands sliding from your hips to cradle your face gently. The kiss is different now, less urgent but still filled with an undeniable passion that leaves you breathless. It’s a slow burn, a simmering heat that makes your skin tingle as his lips move tenderly against yours, savoring every moment.
The kiss tapers off naturally, his lips lingering on yours as if he’s reluctant to let go. When he finally pulls back, he doesn’t move far, his nose brushing against yours in a tender nuzzle that makes you smile.
“Yeah… okay…” he breathes out, voice rough and tinged with longing. “We can slow down… whatever you need…”
His fingers trace the line of your jaw, moving to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear, his touch light, almost reverent.
“Sorry it’s just…” he murmurs, his thumb brushing over your lower lip before leaning in to press a soft kiss to your temple, then your cheek, then the corner of your mouth. Each kiss is gentle. He pulls back slightly, his lips ghosting over yours as he whispers, “You don’t know what you do to me…”
Your heart swells at his words, and you can’t help the smile that tugs at your lips. “I think I’m starting to figure it out,” you softly chuckle.
Satoru mirrors your smile and lets out a soft laugh.
“Well... it’s about damn time you caught on.”
He plops down beside you, pulling you into his arms with an ease that makes your heart flutter. as if being this close to you is the most natural thing in the world. He buries his face into the nape of your neck, inhaling your scent deeply, a content hum leaving his lips as he wraps himself around you, tangling his legs with yours and pulling you closer until there’s no space left between you. The warmth of his body seeps into yours, and you can feel the steady rhythm of his heartbeat against you.
“Was starting to think I’d have to spell it out for you,” he murmurs, breath fanning your skin, sending a pleasant shiver down your spine.
A light and airy laugh escapes your lips as you become engrossed in his warmth.
 “Well, I mean... you’ve always been a bit of a mystery,” you tease, your fingers tracing idle patterns on the back of his hand where it rests against your stomach.
“Hmm, a mystery, huh?” he murmurs, pressing a kiss to your shoulder, sending a ripple of warmth through you. “Maybe… but I think you’ve always had the key, even if you didn’t know it.”
You turn slightly in his arms, bringing a hand up to gently run your fingers through his hair, the soft strands slipping through your fingers like silk as you gaze into his eyes. Your heart swells at the way he leans into your touch, as if he savors each trace of you, and there’s a tenderness in the way his eyes hold yours.
And then, his lips curl into a wry smile, mischief dancing in his eyes.
“Mm… told you you’d fall for my charm. Though I will say, you were a tough one to crack.”
You try to fight the smile threatening to break free as a warmth spreads across your face. It’s crazy to think this man was once the bane of your very existence.
“Tch…you have a way of growing on people, y’know that?” The grin on his face widens at your admission, making the heat in your own face intensify. You huff, rolling your eyes as you nudge him lightly with your elbow. “You’re like a persistent, overly confident weed.”
Satoru laughs. “A weed, huh? That’s a new one,” he sounds mock-offended, though his smirk tells you he’s anything but. His hand shifts, trailing up and down your arm tenderly as his fingers lightly brush your skin. “Mmm let's see…I think I’m more like a rare, exotic flower.”
“Oh please,” you scoff, eyes sparkling with amusement. “You’re more like those persistent kind of weeds that pops up in the cracks of the sidewalk, no matter how many times you try to get rid of them.”
“Persistent, huh? Well I suppose I’ll take that as a compliment,” his tone softens as his hand trails down your arm, the warmth of his touch leaving a trail of fire in its wake until his fingers find yours, threading them together as he interlocks your hands in a gentle, but secure grasp.
“Guess I’ll just have to keep growing on you until you can’t imagine your life without me,” he murmurs—thumb gently stroking the back of your hand—and your breath hitches at the sincerity in his words.
Satoru treats you like a treasure, something to be cherished and protected.
How did you get so lucky?
He’s everything Naoya isn’t—everything you’ve ever wanted but were too afraid to hope for.
But even as the realization crosses your mind, a pang of guilt twists in your chest. You’ve been keeping something from him, something important, something that could change everything. Naoya’s scheme, his attempts to ruin Satoru’s reputation… it’s been eating away at you, gnawing at your conscience every time Satoru looks at you with those warm, trusting eyes.
But the thought terrifies you—what if it changes everything? What if it drives a wedge between you?
You need to tell him. He deserves to know.
No secrets.
You can’t keep hiding the truth. Not if you want to move forward, not if you want to build something real with him.
“Hey,” you begin softly, your voice barely above a whisper as you pull back slightly to look into his eyes. The tenderness in his gaze gives you the strength to continue. “There’s something I need to tell you… something important.”
Satoru’s expression shifts immediately from the seriousness of your tone, his brow knitting together in concern as his eyes dim.
“What is it?”
Oh fuck. This is it. No backing down now.
You take a deep breath, and though your heart pounds in your chest, Satoru’s gentle grip tightens on your hand, offering you the silent support to continue.
“It’s about Naoya…” you begin, voice trembling slightly as you hesitantly hold his gaze.
The tension in Satoru's face is subtle but unmistakable. You briefly catch sight of his jaw tightening, a muscle jumping beneath the skin at the mere mention of Naoya’s name. Swallowing hard, your throat constricts with effort as you struggle to find the right words.
“There’s… something I’ve been keeping from you… and I’m so sorry I didn’t tell you sooner, but I was scared. I didn’t know what to do.”
Satoru’s eyes widen just a fraction, his brows drawing together slightly in concern, but he remains silent—he doesn’t interrupt, doesn’t demand an explanation. Instead, he watches you intently, his gaze locked onto yours, a silent encouragement to continue.
But that intensity in his focus only makes your heart pound harder in your chest, each beat a drum of anxiety.
Here goes nothing.
“He’s been… blackmailing me,” you confess, eyes falling to the side, unable to hold his gaze. “He’s trying to ruin your reputation, to drag your name through the mud…and if I don’t do what he says…”
The words die on your lips as you trail off.
Fuck this is overwhelming.
This entire night has been a rollercoaster, and you’re reaching the breaking point of your own emotional endurance. You expect Satoru to say something, but the silence that follows is deafening.
Each beat of your heart is like a hammer in your chest, and your mind is racing with a thousand different fears.
Is he angry? Is he waiting for you to look at him? Is this it? Is this the moment everything falls apart?
Summoning every ounce of courage you have left, you will yourself to look up, to meet Satoru’s eyes. And yes, there’s anger simmering in the depths of his gaze, a dangerous edge to it, but there’s something else too—something softer.
“What will happen if you don’t do what he says?” he asks, voice gentle yet firm. His thumb brushes soothing circles on the back of your hand with a tenderness, urging you to continue. “What exactly is he threatening you with?”
You take a deep, shaky breath, feeling the lump in your throat swell as you struggle to push the words out.
“He’s trying to take Haru away from me… he’s threatening to file for full custody if I don’t cooperate.”
The impact of your words is immediate—Satoru’s entire demeanor changing in an instant.
His expression hardens, the fury in his eyes flaring to life, unmistakable and searing, and his entire body tenses beside you. A shiver rakes down your spine when you hear the low and dangerous promise slip through his lips.  
“He’s going to regret this.”
Before you can even process his words, he pulls you onto his chest, wrapping his arms around you with a fierce protectiveness that catches you off guard. It is almost startling how the gentle way he holds you is juxtaposed with the anger simmering just beneath the surface, and as his fingers begin to thread through your hair while he cradles you close to him, you feel he is shielding you from the very world that threatens to tear you apart.
“He’s not taking Haru from you,” Satoru vows, voice unwavering, a promise etched in steel. “Not over my dead body.”
Ah…the conviction in his voice—the words you needed to hear—it is your breaking point. Finally, everything crashes down on you. The fear, the guilt, the overwhelming relief that you’re no longer carrying this burden alone—it all hits you at once, and you can’t hold back the quiet sob that escapes your lips.
Satoru tightens his hold on you, one hand gently stroking your hair, the other trailing up and down your trembling frame as he whispers reassurances.
“Hey, it’s okay… we’re going to get through this.”
His heartbeat is a steady and comforting rhythm beneath your ear. You nod weakly as a shaky breath escapes your lips, the sound muffled against his chest, and he presses a kiss to the top of your head, lips lingering for a moment.
“When did this all begin?” he whispers, fingers gently massaging your scalp.
“Two days ago…” you murmur, “right before you agreed to watch Haru for me.”
There’s a moment of silence, a brief pause as Satoru processes your words. You feel the subtle hitch in his breath, the soft exhale that follows as he tries to contain the emotions swirling inside him. He pulls back just enough to look at you, and your heart drops at his expression.
“y/n…” he breathes out, low and thick with emotion as his jaw clenches with tension. “Why didn’t you tell me sooner?”
The ache in your chest is unbearable, and the tears begin to prick at your eyes again. Unable to face the underlying look of his own disappointment, you instinctively look away.
“I was scared and confused… I didn’t think you felt the same way about me,” you admit, voice barely above a whisper. “And I kept thinking about our contract…about your condition…”
Satoru’s body softens underneath you as he gently tilts your chin up, forcing you to meet his gaze, and what you find there isn’t disappointment, but understanding—a deep, unwavering understanding that cuts through your doubts like a beacon of light in the darkness.
“y/n, there is no contract when it comes to how I feel about you,” he murmurs, his thumb brushing away a lingering tear that slipped down your cheek. “That contract… it was just a piece of paper. Besides, it’s void now because I broke the clause.” His lips curve into a soft, reassuring smile. “What I feel for you… it’s real. And it’s not something that can be defined by a contract.”
His words are like a balm to your wounded heart, soothing the fear that had been gnawing at you.
Why did you doubt him so much? Is it because this is a love you have only hoped for? But now it’s real—it’s yours.
A shaky exhale escapes your lips as you rest your forehead against his.
“I’m sorry,” you whisper, voice trembling. “I should have told you sooner.”
“Shh, it’s okay,” Satoru soothes, his hands moving up to cradle your face. “I understand why you were scared. But we’re in this together, okay? Naoya’s not going to win.”
His hands gently tilt your face upwards, and before you can respond, he leans in, capturing your lips in a tender kiss. His lips move slowly, languidly against yours, savoring the moment, and you melt into the kiss, your hands finding their way to his chest, feeling the steady thump of his heart beneath your fingertips.
When he finally pulls back, his forehead rests against yours once more, and you linger there in the aftermath, letting the warmth of his breath fan across your lips, the closeness between you wrapping around you like a cocoon. A content sigh escapes your lips as the tension from everything slowly ebbs away, and you lower yourself onto his chest as Satoru’s fingers gently trail up and down your back.
Finally, everything has been laid bare. No secrets. Just the two of you, connected in a way that feels unbreakable.
But then, Satoru shifts slightly beneath you, “You’re shivering,” he murmurs, voice laced with concern as his hand moves to gently rub your arm, trying to warm you up. “We were out in the rain for too long…”
You hadn’t even noticed—your focus had been so consumed by everything else. Now that the adrenaline of the moment has begun to fade, you realize how cold you are, and how you’re both still in your underwear. The chill from the rain has started to seep into your bones.
“You should take a warm bath, get comfortable,” Satoru suggests, loving but insistent as he brushes a few stray strands of wet hair away from your face, tucking them gently behind your ear. “It’s been a long day, and we have to wake up early to get home to Haru. You can go first. Go on, I’ll wait for you here.”
You nod, reluctantly pulling away from the warmth of his embrace as you make your way to the bathroom.
The hot water feels like a balm against your chilled skin, and you take your time, letting the warmth seep into your bones and soothe the lingering tension in your muscles. It’s a quiet, reflective moment—an opportunity to process everything that’s happened. As the steam rises around you, you feel the weight of the day slowly lift from your shoulders.
After finishing your bath, you slip into the comfortable pajamas the hotel provided and find yourself wrapped up cozily under the blankets in the bed, waiting for Satoru as he takes his turn getting cleaned up next. The room is quiet—the rain outside has finally settled down as the once insistent pattering is now reduced to a soft, comforting drum against the window. You let your eyes drift closed for a moment, savoring the tranquility and the subtle scent of Satoru that lingers on the pillow beside you.
Tonight, has been exhausting—so much has happened, and it’s a lot to take in.
When Satoru finally emerges from the bathroom, he is dressed in the comfortable hotel linens, hair slightly damp and tousled. He flashes you a tender smile, one that makes your heart skip a beat, and you can’t help but smile back, warmth spreading through you.
But instead of joining you in the bed as you would expect, you watch with growing curiosity as he makes his way towards the closet. Propping yourself up on your elbow, you tilt your head slightly, your brows knitting together in confusion.
“What are you doing?” you observe him gather extra blankets and pillows, tucking them under his arm.
Satoru glances over his shoulder, offering you a small, almost apologetic smile.
“I’m, uh… gonna sleep on the couch tonight,” he says casually, as if it’s the most natural thing in the world.
You blink, taken aback by his words, and a frown tugs at your lips.
“Why? You don’t have to do that. The bed’s big enough for both of us.”
He hesitates, as if weighing his words carefully.
“Y/n,” he begins, low and rough, “Believe me, I really want to,” he lets out a sigh and scratches the back of his head. “You have… too much of an effect on me. I meant it when I said we could take things slow, but if I’m lying next to you, I don’t know if I can control myself.”
His admission sends a warm flush to your face, your heart skipping a beat at the honesty in his words. You see the tension in his shoulders, the way he’s struggling to do what he thinks is right, even though it’s clearly not what he wants.
“Satoru…” you begin, your voice softening as you start to sit up, but he shakes his head gently, cutting you off before you can say more.
“If you want to take it slow, it’s probably for the best I give us some space to figure things out without making it harder than it already is.”
Damnit, he is too cute for his own good.
For a moment, you’re tempted to tell him to stay, to ignore the rules you’ve set for yourself, to just give in to the pull between you. The warmth of his presence, the comfort of his touch—it’s all so inviting. But you can also see how much he’s trying to do right by you, to honor your wishes, even if it means sacrificing what he wants.
“Okay,” you say softly, your teeth gently grazing your bottom lip as you consider your next words, “but just know that although I want to go slow, it doesn’t mean that I wouldn’t mind… doing things with you.”
Satoru lets out a groan, closing his eyes briefly as if battling with himself.
“You’re not making this easy, you know that?”
“Mm… never said I would,” you challenge, a playful glint flickering in your eyes as a crooked grin tugs at your lips.
He chuckles, tinged with both amusement and exasperation.
“I swear you’re gonna be the death of me,” he mutters, shaking his head slightly, but the smile that accompanies his words is soft, filled with affection.
The two of you share a quiet laugh, soft and intimate, like a shared secret. As the laughter fades, a comfortable silence settles over you both. His gaze locks with yours, and for a moment, time seems to stand still. The intensity in his eyes, the way they darken with something deeper, makes your breath hitch.
“Goodnight, Satoru,” you murmur as you settle yourself back into the pillows.
“Goodnight, y/n,” his smile widens as his gaze lingers on you for a moment longer before he turns to leave the room. “If you need anything,” he adds, pausing at the door, “you know where to find me.”
As the door softly clicks shut behind him, you’re left alone in the dimly lit room—left to your thoughts.
Tomorrow holds so much for the both of you—decisions to be made, obstacles to overcome, and a new chapter in your lives to navigate together.
For the first time in what feels like forever, you don’t feel alone. The burden isn’t yours to carry anymore. The thought brings a sense of peace, a calm that wraps around you as you pull the blankets closer, cocooning yourself in their warmth.
There’s still so much left unresolved, and the threat of Naoya looms large. But tonight, as you drift off to sleep, all you can think about is the way Satoru looked at you, the promise in his eyes that you’ll face whatever comes next together.
And somehow, that alone makes everything seem a little less daunting.
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hi hi, thank you all so much for your kind words with this fic and for sticking around. this chapter was a lot for me to write, and i really kept second guessing it tbh. i think bc it's such a pivotal point in the story and it's pretty emotional, so i really wanna thank my lovely beta readers for helping me 💕 (@strychnynegirl & @gojoslefttoenail) hmm... who is this mysterious man that approached y/n at the gala? 🤔 i wonder if you guys can take a guess based on the description 😉 also of COURSE there is only ✨one bed✨ how can there NOT be? 🤭 i had a lot of fun writing their steamy kiss 😩 as much as i wanted them to do more i also wanna reiterate how much the slow burn in this story means to me. idk, with everything going on in y/n's life it didn't feel right for her to be like "cool lets fuck." especially since she still needed to tell satoru the truth, plus she is a mom with a kid and has been through a really shitty relationship. trust isn't something that just POOF appears yk? thanks for all your kind words and for reading!! school has been picking up for me, so again my updates will likely be longer in between. love you all 🥹 -aly 💕 → you are currently all caught upꨄ
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elftwink · 4 months ago
Text
best out of context* taako moments found in old documents by kas elftwink
(*some context added so that the jokes will land.)
modern au where the thb get stuck in an elevator (which is honestly 98% bit by volume):
Taako takes another quick couple breaths into his hands, tuning out the dumb argument happening around him. He was actually going to cook. Lup was coming over because they hadn't cooked in the new kitchen. And there's no cell service in this stupid elevator so he can't even text her to tell her he's dead now, say goodbye to everyone for him, don't take his stuff. Taako really hopes that noise was just the building settling and not a sign that the elevator is going to actually send them plummeting to their deaths. "Did you guys hear that?" "The elevator making that horrible creaking noise?" chimes in Taako, "No, I hadn't noticed, why?" There's a couple of seconds of silence and Taako peeks through his fingers at Magnus and Merle. They still look like they're bickering, but it's a lot more physical, head jerks and small kicks and mouthing of words that Taako can't make out. Finally, Magnus takes a step towards him. “Taako, are you… okay?” “Listen, Maggie, Mango, don’t take this one the wrong way, but fuck off.” Taako drops his hands from his face and tilts his head back until it hits the wall. There’s a loud ‘thunk’ when it connects and Magnus winces, but Taako is determined not to show that it kind of stung when he did that, so he glowers some more. “You guys figure that shit out. I’m going to sit here and think about how I could have been making brownies. You guys know you could have had brownies? Huh? If we walked you could have had brownies. I hate you guys.”
literally the only text in a doc titled "uni au bits":
“Taako did you want to try one?” “Oh yeah sure, just, uh, gimme one sec—” Taako fishes around in his bag for a minute and pulls out a tube, blue on one end, orange cap in the other. “Here’s my epipen, and when I collapse after eating that you just— just jab that motherfucker right into, uh, right into my thigh, and then you can foot the ambulance bill. Sound good?”
spy au where taako is infiltrating a party & talking to magnus through an ear piece:
“Are y— are you fucking eating right now?” “Wha— no,” says Magnus, clearly through a mouthful of food. Taako hopes his glare is self-evident even if it’s not visible. “I can guide through a bite of ramen.” “You fu— you have fucking soup? Are you kidding me? Soup? Tha— you know that setup is easily half a million in tech, right?” “So I won’t spill.” “Unbelievable. Fuck you. Where am I going?”
star trek au:
“Lieutenant Commander— we need you in engineering.” “Can it wait like, an hour?” “Not really, Taako.” Davenport’s voice is strained in that way he gets when something is about to explode but he’s supposed to remain professional, so Taako just sighs. “Can I bring a plus one?” “Not really, Taako!” “Alright, alright, be there in a minute.” Taako taps the communicator again before looking to Kravitz. “Do you want a tour of engineering?” “It sounded like you weren’t supposed to bring a plus one.” Taako waves his hand. “Don’t worry about it. He’ll forgive me eventually.” Truth be told, he doesn’t want to leave Kravitz wandering the halls of the Starblaster by himself. Plus, if something is in crisis in Engineering, maybe it’ll help his case that the crew constantly has to make snap decisions to keep the ship running and prevent the crisis from reaching the ship’s civilians. “Come on, I have to help stop the ship from blowing up,” he says, and then adds, “Just kidding. It’ll be fine,” at Kravitz’s raised eyebrows. The trip to Engineering is quick, although Taako takes the opportunity to waffle about the Starblaster and the work they do as much as he can, and answers Kravitz’s questions about the ship as he goes. “Anyway, the lower section of the Starblaster, the o— where we are right now, uh, mostly…” Taako trails off as they turn the corner into Engineering, eyes widening. “Holy shi— what the fuck is that?” The warp core is sealed off, but that’s not the major problem— the major problem is the crystals coating the surface of one of the wall displays. The place is noticeably empty of engineers, except Davenport, standing next to science officer Bluejeans, both of them pouring over a tricorder. “Pink tourmaline, apparently,” says Davenport, looking up from the tricorder and immediately sighing. “Why did I know you weren’t really asking about the plus one thing?” “We’re in the middle of a very important diplomatic discussion,” says Taako. “That’s why you’re still holding a glass of wine?” “With all due respect, Lieutenant Bluejeans, sh—” “Can we focus, please?” cuts in Davenport, and Taako silently offers his wine glass to Kravitz, who has no problem taking it off his hands.
star trek au slightly to the left:
The planet doesn’t look like anything special when Magnus and the twins beam down. Of course, it isn’t really— they’re reminded often that every planet is different or whatever and space travel is amazing isn’t the universe great blah blah blah, whatever, but… the last few missions have been mostly just talks. Ferrying ambassadors, representing the Federation, whatever. Taako’s sure it’d be hard work if he was doing anything other than wearing a slightly fancier uniform and looking pretty. As it is, he’s just bored, and he’s not the only one. Half the crew is bored and half is stressed beyond belief. He suspects that’s why Davenport gave them the okay to beam down in the first place, seeing as he, Lup, and Magnus were definitely the most… vocal about their boredom. Well, Taako was vocal. Lup and Magnus damn near blew a hole in one of the shuttle bay doors.
text convo between taako and lup after taako tells her about finding a dog and lup is pretty sure she knows who's looking for it:
Lup: whats the verdict Taako: yah thats the dog Taako: ur friends cute Lup: hes married Taako: oh what im not allowed to have eyes now??? im not allowed to compliment men w/o u assuming im trying to fuck??? Lup: do u want his number Taako: no hes not my type Taako: wait u just said he was married Lup: so u can call him about the DOG idiot Taako: oh right Taako: yah
+1 bonus magnus bit:
Magnus throws a punch. It’s a plan that has to happen quickly, but he finds time in the split second to run down what he’s trying to do and what the options are. Goal: stop Taako from putting on the sash. Ways to do that: 1. Punch him in the head. Magnus actually stopped listing after that.
thinking about getting into a relisten of taz balance because the other day i was going through my old unfinished fic documents and not only do i still have a gazillion taz ones laying around 80% finished but also my taako is literally so funny it feels cruel for all these extremely good bits to rot in my hard drive forevermore
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