#but i dont seem to be like in the majority of feelings / opinions on that and its disheartening
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qiu-yan · 6 months ago
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arundolyn · 11 months ago
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You. Thoughts on uni2 story content?
admittedly i havent played the Most bc ive been recovering from getting my teeth yoinked and fighting game takes too much brain power atm BUT. confused as to why theres no proper story mode like chronicle was in cl-r, as for arcades- intrigued by linne's specifically and tbh kinda happy about it. enk's is SO...... BITING HIM. CARMINE'S IS FUCKING BONKERS BUT HONESTLY I CAN'T SAY I EXPECTED ANY LESS FROM HIS CRAZY ASS
overall. in general. Tonally. the Finality of it feels. not. actually? there? really? it seems arbitrary. it's hard to have actual like. how do i put it. meat. of a story. without a real story mode. like all we get are arcades??? both from a storytelling standpoint and also like ALL the promo material it kinda falls flat on what was promised, or at least Implied. i was literally streaming it for my bf day 1 and when i opened the game one of the first things i said was "wait there's no actual story mode option?" to have such heavy emphasis on how this is the End this is the Last one For Real feels forced when we haven't had any legit buildup to that point and even in the game itself aside from cliche anime vague dialogue about how This Needs To End and whatnot it doesn't narratively convey this all that effectively
like personally im not all that . idk. disappointed? by that bc i still need to catch up on chronicle mode from cl-r and haven't had time/focus to do so buuuuut... like. idk it feels weird now? why'd they throw chronicle into the middle game and now leave the supposed last one hanging. especially when theres a lot of loose plot threads that arent getting delivered on adequately, and by the fundamental nature of arcade modes in fighting games none of them are exactly fully 100% for real canon because there's a lot of contradictions so........ what does actually happen. kuon dies yeah sure that was his whole thing and kinda the whole conceit of this game sure sure whatever but like what ELSE? esp with carmine's arcade being so tonally weird the whole time and him talking about how he's dying anyway like SURE IN HIS ENDING HE GOES FULLY APESHITT BUT LIKE WHAT HAPPENS TO HIM FOR REALSIES DOES HE JUST DESPAWN?
all this aside its fun and i like it and all howwwwever there is a slight sense of like.. barring system rework and ui updates it feels like this could just be cl-r dlc of kaguya tsurugi and kuon and not a hell of a lot would change overall?
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early-sxnsets · 1 year ago
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haaaaiiii guyyyyssss (gn) probably gonna be on here more often again soon. life events occurring. have occurred? still occurring, i suppose.
i'll probably post abt it more in depth at some ltr point, still in the very early stages of some stuff. i dont want to classify them as positive or negative things, however they're certainly things.
there's a lot of thoughts in my brain (hah), and ultimately i want to share them, but for now this is kind of me waving at everyone with a smile while my life has an "under construction" sign
#the last sentence also pertains to system stuff bc there was a major split from a significant alter#so like imagine an 'under new management' sign as well#not a host shift tho afaik but the split has resulted in a new fronter who's very active and has been co-con very frequently since#i've been having a Time recently in ways i'll ltr divulge abt but i finally established a solid communication with her today and that helped#i dont know how many splits/alters had broken off because intuition is saying a few but she's the most present and active in my awareness#i think we settled on her name being Lily but that may not be concrete#for a few alters i get like a single letter for their name and i try to work with them to find a name within that letter that feels right#one of my oldest and closest alters has only had the letter 'E' for the longest time and he and i cant find a solid name yet#every now and again im like 'edgar??? edwin??? edward??? emil???' and he's like 'fuck if i know' so like. fair enough dude.#i wonder if he'd like ez/ezara given that's a name we picked for ourselves pre-diagnosis however he doesn't fit that name in my opinion#ANYWAY. Lily is a teen girl in very much every way possible and she's very much an ANP#she is loved but as i type that she made it clear she's having an eyeroll reaction but that is the best i've got lol#i dont really mention system members often on here and mention them moreso to friends however i have a feeling she'll want a sideblog tbh#which is not something i've created/done for alters before as generally most of the system choose to be more private#but she seems extremely social and i want to give her her own space#i hesitate to give her an okay posting on her own on here mainly because i am an adult and i consider this blog an adult space#but im also okay discussing her in reference if that makes dense#anyway. yeah. as you can probably imagine shit has been Going On given there was a major split/restructuring but again that's for later#that's enough rambling from me lol ttyl
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foxdies · 11 months ago
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social media really rots peoples ability to create and maintain friendships and treat other ppl like human beings instead of voices/letters/words in their keyboard etc
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99pansy · 2 months ago
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ss/mayo blogspot lore + frerard theory
hi I'm about to drop some insane lore that I don't think a lot of mcr fans/frerard theorists know about. this isn't discussed often so I figured I should write about it here before all the evidence is lost to time.
this is probably gonna be a long one so buckle in! i have gathered as much evidence here as possible but there's no way to be certain about anything. i'm trying to maintain as much journalistic integrity as i can throughout this post (also trying super hard not to insert my opinion too much) because i think a lot of this speaks for itself.
so i have a pretty significant frerard theory but i have to give a lot of backstory and documentation for it to fully make sense. this will not be in chronological order (to best suit the narrative) but i hope it makes sense
many people know about frank's F.T. Willz endeavors which have been proven as him in recent years. however, "ss" or "shitsubou shita" was another blog he had before this which is not widely known
around 2007, there was a major theory in the fandom that gerard and frank were running secret blogspot accounts where they'd post journals, poetry, etc. frank's account was iamthemodernprometheus.blogspot.com and gerard's supposed account was its-mayonaise.blogspot.com. both accounts are still up, though i'm not sure if any posts have since been deleted. this probably sounds crazy so i'll explain everything!
evidence for frank as SS/shitsubou-shita/iamthemodernprometheus
i strongly believe this was frank's personal blog, but you can come to your own conclusions based on this info
frank's supposed original blogspot handle was "shitsubou-shita." once fans realized this was his account, he deleted it pretty much immediately. you can read some fan discussion about the fall out from this in a comment thread here. this comment thread will be linked a few times in this post because most of the screenshots on this post originate from there.
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apparently *frank* was posting some very personal thoughts/feelings on this blog that he did not want to be discovered. i'll go over some of the deleted posts in a minute, but first i need to give more a little more context.
at the same time the blog is found, someone comments "your fired" on a recent post. apparently some fans thought the comment looked strangely out of place, and it was one of the last comments left before the account's deletion, on one of the final posts made.
this will be relevant later on, and we'll get into the account's posts soon.
my theory is that someone on the "inside" could have found his personal blog and tried spooking him, which could have been the final straw for him. or, the account being deleted could be completely unrelated to the weird comment. all of this can be found here (same link i posted previously)
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months after deleting their blog, shitsubou shita begins posting under a new url "iamthemodernprometheus" (but still under the pen name "shitsubou shita" or "ss" as fans called him)
in his new blog, and similarly to F.T. Willz years later, he still leaves plenty of crumbs for fans to figure out it's him. screenshot sources are below
latin heading: his page had a latin heading that when translated, reads "keep the faith"
bio on blogspot: "industry - chemicals", and "you dont stop playing cos you get old…you get old cos you stop playing" both sound suspiciously personal to frank
his url choice: "the modern prometheus" is the full title of mary shelley's frankenstein. frankenstein is a character that frank has always deeply resonated with due to his namesake, love of horror, and being born on halloween
spelling of wierd: SS and frank both spell "weird" as "wierd"
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i think he enjoyed the mystery of having a secret online persona, which eventually led to the creation of F.T. Willz in 2008. it seems like wanted to leave just enough evidence for people to suspect it was him, but not enough to prove it.
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here are some snippets of 2007 era discourse about the identity of "ss" and their deleted blog. you can find all of these comments and more context here. this was around the time gerard got married and fans felt like the dynamic on stage was different, and they were concerned about the future of the band. it's a LOT to go over so i would advise reading the comments if you want more perspective
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on the next page, an anonymous comment is posted which fans immediately begin to speculate is SS (frank). again, if you click the link you can get way more context than i'm able to provide here.
this insinuates that SS frequented the comments on mayo's blog, which i don't think he would have done without believing/knowing mayo is gerard
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there was a lot discussed in this thread including pretty solid evidence that frank/ss wrote the ancient and historic "eliza post"
if you are not aware of the eliza cuts drama, that's a totally different and equally as insane rabbit hole you'll have to research on your own
tldr; she is gerard's mentally unstable ex-fiance who he was engaged to very shortly before lindsey
gerard and eliza got engaged on may 22, 2007 (the last show of the black parade tour) according to this reddit comment.
the "eliza post" went up on june 4, 2007. here is the post in its entirety:
"Hi I felt I had to write to you guys to allay some of your fears regarding the rumours and speculation surrounding Gerard and Eliza and the future of the band. This is the only time I will ever post. I will not be able to respond to your comments or enter into discussion or debate on what I'm about to say. We are aware that this is one of the most popular message boards for MCR fans and we know you guys are the most dedicated and loyal fans in the world. It saddens me to see such division amongst the fans over one woman. If it's any consolation, you guys are not the only ones affected. She is merely tolerated by both band and crew. Believe me, nothing anyone can say will change his mind. She's been the cause of numerous conflicts and while we dont have to like it, we have to accept it, at least for the forseeable future. From day one this woman has had a hidden agenda - her manipulation knows no bounds. Some of you may find this difficult to believe but I assure you I have personally witnessed the two sides of this woman. Her so-called 'good deeds' are nothing more than PR exercises for his benefit. But he does not see what goes on behind closed doors. We have tried to draw his attention to her blatant self-promotion and diva demands. This is a prime example of love being blind. His feelings for her do run very deep. Her feelings for him, however, are questionable at best. Many people believe, including myself, that he is being used as nothing more than a stepping stone. It's disheartening to see someone you care about and have worked with for a very long time change as a person, becoming more detached and causing the group dynamic to change as a result. There have been conflicts and differences of opinions and compromises have had to be made She does not accompany the band on the European legs of the tour. Since being on this current European leg, he seems much happier which suggest she doesnt make him as happy as he thinks. Despite being asked more than once to remain discreet, she blatantly disregards his wish to keep his personal life private by continually fuelling the internet hype. The band has always been about the music and the fans. This will not change. MCR have never endorsed any type of clique as it encourages and promotes the kind of high school mentality that MCR have always fought against. Your continued support is appreciated and rest assured this woman will have no adverse affect on the band and the music. For obvious reasons I am remaining anonymous. Eliza, we know you trawl these message boards and you probably know who I am - but I'd like to see you try and prove it!!!"
it's clear that whoever wrote this had a very strong distaste for eliza and was deeply troubled by the idea of gerard marrying her. based on the language used and style of writing, i strongly believe frank wrote this post. i'll be circling back to this in a minute, because i have a little more to go over.
for more evidence that SS is frank, we can reference this reddit comment made just 9 months ago by someone heavily involved in the blogspot community at the time, kapunua. their username on this post is "ReallyKapu."
if you read through the comment links I provided earlier, you may see their name pop up. they are also mentioned by name on the "iamthemodernprometheus" blog. if you also search "kapunua mcr" on google, you can verify their involvement in the blogspot community at the time.
kapunua is also mentioned in its-mayonaise's post here (no screenshot provided for this one, its just a small mention)
there's also a screenshot of a different comment kapunua made about 9 years ago with similar information. i found the screenshot here.
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evidence that "mayo" is gerard
as mentioned in the post above, mayo often used british english syntax in his posts. he also posted about some pretty juicy stuff including a blowjob poem (you can seek that out yourself)
using british english isn't out of the ordinary for gerard. he often used an accent on stage during this time. moreover, he is a writer who has written multiple characters with this type of accent, showing he has a certain appeciation for it. i think his persona for the "mayo" account could been a sort of character he put on to disguise his idenity.
if you decide to view mayo's blog, you'll see each post has nothing but comments from mcr fans exclusively. i find it very interesting that the writer of its-mayonaise never bothered to make a post saying "hey, btw, i'm not gerard" in the 4 years this blog was run for
we have somewhat less definitive evidence that gerard is mayo. however, it is clear that at the very least, they had to have been someone involved with MCR or their crew at the time.
mayo makes a post alluding to their identity here, which you can find in the first screenshot below. this section sounds a lot like something gerard would write:
"I have been asked to reveal myself to you. You all know me. I am whoever you want me to be, I am an artist, a poet, a singer, a motherfucker, and a contradiction, a mouthpiece, a friend, and an enemy, a brother, an informant, a whipping boy, a basket case, a queen, and a criminal...(credit to John Hughes.)"
there are THOUSANDS of comments, many of which speculate the identity of mayo on each of his blogspot posts. you should definitely do your own detective work and see what you think, because there is far too much info to go through here.
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a frerard theory
as i previously mentioned, frank had deleted his original blog for shitsubou-shita in late september. however, prior to this, he made and then deleted some particularly turbulent and questionable posts
for context, the frerard fight happened on august 22, 2007, and gerard and lindsey got married on september 3, 2007 (just four months after gerard was engaged to eliza)
gerard and lindsey are married on the last night of the projekt revolution tour.
mcr takes a break for one month after this, where we can probably safely assume that freshly-married gerard and frank did not plan on seeing one another.
i think this was very troubling for frank for many different reasons. gerard had just freed himself of the eliza situation and here he was making the same mistake again. he was on the verge of losing his dearest friend yet again, and i believe that despite his best efforts, he could not get through to gerard.
obviously, gerard and lindsey are still married to this day. however, many fans might be aware of what happened between her and mikey. there's also a lot of other questionable information about lindsey circling the web, but that's a different story for another time.
weeks later, similarly to the eliza situation, shitsubou-shita makes and deletes the following posts on his original blog (this was prior to the creation of iamthemodernprometheus):
Friday, September 21, 2007 Abandon hope, all who enter here... What the fuck happened? Why didn't I see this coming? I made a point to keep out of it this time, but at what cost? I'm trapped between a rock and a hard place, it's a lose/lose situation. I've always been honest with you, shouldn't that work both ways? What's with the double standards? People are starting to notice. I'm not talking about kids, I'm talking about people in their mid 20's and 30's. People with life experience who can see the cracks starting to show. What am I supposed to say? I just dont have the answers. How can I reassure them when I need reassurance myself?
he says "i made a point to keep out of it this time" which seems like a reference to the situation with eliza i mentioned previously. he alludes to the idea that fans are beginning to notice the band's dynamic is not the same anymore. this was specifically around the time when "frerard" moments came to a pretty abrupt end.
he says "i've always been honest with you, shouldn't that work both ways?" which can be interpreted in a few different ways. he may feel deceived due to his best friend's sudden marriage. however, the intensity of the language used in this post shows he probably had some very intense feelings toward the situation.
it seems like the writer was having a considerably difficult time coping with these feelings. a day later, this post is made:
Saturday, September 22, 2007 Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me. Bullshit. I've always been a smart ass, even as a child, although my mom would prefer to use the term precocious. I've always had trouble keeping my mouth shut, I'm an open book, completely ingenuous - secrecy and circumvention are not my style. But then I've never experienced extreme paranoia. So I'm writing this blog. I know you will never read it, I wouldn't want you to. Not everything is about you. This blog is for ME, a perverse catharsis, I need this right now to preserve the small amount of sanity I have left. A blog fuelled by disappointment, frustration, confusion and dejection. I am not laying the blame at your door. The burden of blame is mine. I didn't speak up soon enough. I didn't want to rock the boat, I've been there before. I didn't want to fight or endure days of being given the silent treatment. Its not fair on the others. Why do you always make everyone feel like they have to take sides? If I had been a better friend, I would have stepped in regardless of the consequences. I acted selfishly because I didn't want to lose you, but ironically, I may have lost you anyway. I meant every word I said at the diner and although I didnt show it, your smirk and glib response hurt me more than you will ever know. I don't know who you are anymore. I cant seem to find the right words. Nothing I say seems to reach you. You are wrong. I DO care. I love you. I refuse to give up on you and I refuse to let you push me away. I am going to fight for our friendship, you aren't the only one with a stubborn streak. We are in this together, for the long haul, I promise. I want my friend back. I miss him.
it seems like whatever the writer is feeling toward the subject of this post goes beyond the boundaries of a typical friendship. the final paragraph says everything we need to know.
we can assume that based on this post's mention of meeting a diner, that frank and gerard likely met up during their month-long break to talk about the way things went down
lastly, i know there's at least one interview floating or blog post around where frank says he was a difficult teen and a pain in the ass as a kid, but i can't find it right now. if anyone has the link to that i would love to add it here, because i remember it sounding pretty similar to that first paragraph.
Sunday, September 23, 2007 Is the pen really mightier than the sword? And so you continue to blog, as do I. The difference is, I am not hurting anyone. I'm just trying to gain some perspective while you are publicly making a fool of yourself. Your words are hungrily devoured and dissected by the masses, you seem to revel in the chaos and controversy. At the moment your identity is pure speculation, but have you thought about the consequences if anyone was able to prove your identity? Not just for you, but for all of us? Have you lost your mind? How can you be so selfish? You have become a self obsessed megalomaniac. I know what I get out of writing my blogs - but what do you get out of writing yours? Do you even bother to read the comments? Some of those comments break my heart. These aren't just nameless, faceless strangers, these are real people with real lives and real feelings. These are the people that allowed us to bring our music into their lives. These are the people that we see on tour, the people that wait outside for hours in the cold and rain just to meet us, the people that write us letters and make us scrapbooks, the people who care enough to bake us cookies and brownies, the people that send us birthday cards and bizarre, crazy ass gifts, the people that have given us their love and support, the people that cheer us on, the people that made us. Why are you so hellbent on destroying not only yourself, but everyone who loves you? You wanna see how far down I can sink? Your mom called last night - and I lied to her. After everything she has done for us, I lied to her. How do you think that made me feel? Do you even care?
this last post, for me, solidifies the identities behind each blog. it is so clear through the details in this post. to me, it seems like frank was hurting so bad, and in such a vulnerable place, that he completely let his guard down and made this post.
the mcr lyric included "You wanna see how far down I can sink?" is undoubtedly mind-boggling and speaks volumes to how carelessly obvious frank was (maybe intentionally?) willing to be
there's so much to unpack in this post and i honestly can't even begin to wrap my head around it. i would love to hear anyone's opinion!
later in the post, it seems clear that he is referencing the iam-mayonaise blog and gerard's seemingly wreckless posting. but mostly, i think he was lashing out due to pain of betrayal after losing the closest person to him and someone he deeply loves not once, but twice.
again, it's hard to believe how obvious he was being here, but i really think it was a result of the pain/suffering he felt
if you scroll back up to the first screenshot of this post, you can circle back around to when he removed his entire profile after making this final post, eventually rebranding to "iamthemodernprometheus"
the its-mayonaise account makes this post on september 30, seemingly as a response. the title could apply to frank, who as we all know, was gerard's best friend and right-hand man. the rest of this post can be interpreted in many different ways, so you can make whatever you want out of it:
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however, the last paragraph does give me pause... i would love to see/create a full analysis of this post, but i'm trying to stick to facts here so you can form your own judgement
after gerard's wedding and mcr's month long break, they play two shows in mexico (oct 4 & 7, 2007) and then the hoboken show takes place, where frank yells "lie to me" during i'm not okay and seems very low energy and unlike himself
i believe things gradually improved between them after this point, but i'm not sure if their connection was ever completely the same.
conclusion/my opinion
coupled with all of the other available evidence about gerard/frank's tumultuous friendship/relationship/situationship, i think this information strongly alludes to the idea that at the very least, frank had some very intense feelings for gerard that were not fully reciprocated. i would love to hear what anyone else's opinion is on this topic, because it definitely isn't discussed often
i think it's completely heartbreaking (especially with everything else we know) but i do think their incredible connection is a massive contributing factor to mcr's legacy
if you notice any inconsistencies in this post or have any questions, please send me a message! i want to keep this as consistent, comprehensible, and well-sourced as i can!
lastly please follow me if you liked this! i spent months researching and compiling sources for this post and i would so appreciate it <3
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angelwishess · 2 months ago
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𝜗𝜚 Floyra Intro Post !
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❝Because theres no one on the land or in the sea more in sync than those two.❞
|| playlist. || moodboard. || pinterest quotes. || pinterest board. || (<- in the “Dynamic w Floyd” section!) { A more “emotional” yap session of Floyra and how much deeper their relationship is }
— Floyra Content Masterlist
Floyra is the ship of my main oc, Kyra and Floyd! Kyra is my Yuusona twisted from the Disney Princess Stereotype.
This intro post is just to graph out the timeline and details of their relationship. Funfacts at the end :3 (Fair warning though, this ended up being SUPER long… So feel free just to skip to the funfacts if you want HAHAHA)
Please note I may or may not have changed some things in the canon storyline for my own amusement hehe. Nothing too major though.
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Tropes :
Idiots to Lovers, Bestfriends to Lovers, Soulmates, literally the DENSEST people ever … Actually they’re more like cowards. Mutual pining, mutual SIMPING they ADORE eachother they are absolutely WHIPPED, chaotic lovey dovey couple, tooth-rotting fluff, no i mean seriously this is the fluffiest ship EVER, they make eachother both better and worse simultaniously. They share the same braincell. Basically already a couple before they even start dating but they dont realize it.
Kyra: “What?? Ofc we’re not dating lmao wdym we’re just friends!!” <- just held his face tenderly and looked into his eyes adoringly while calling him the prettiest boy in the world and kissing his face all over
Floyd: “yeah lol why would u think that” <- arm around her waist, basically always looking at her with a dopey grin and heart eyes
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First Impressions
When Floyd heard that there was an unexpected appearance of a magicless student at the entrance ceremony that blazed in with a flaming fire tanuki and set fire to the mirror chamber, he was intrigued. When he learned that very same student was, quite literally, from an entirely different world, he was even more intrigued.
Not to mention the fact she lived in that rundown, deteriorating 'dorm' that was literally called Ramshackle, and she was almost expelled with two other guppies on the very first day of school.
But, when he saw her for himself he was... Disappointed.
Often times she just stood by the sidelines, seemingly in her own world with a far-off look in her eyes and an empty smile that ticked him off for no apparent reason.
She never reacted to anything, letting people walk over her like some sort of welcome mat. Somehow, she didn't even feel alive.
To put it bluntly— Floyd thought she was boring.
Just a wimpy, puny little shrimp who didn't even have any magic. Who wouldn't even run away if her life was on the line, weak and defenseless. Naive. How boring, and here he thought he had another play thing... But wheres the fun if he doesn't get a reaction out of it? How lame.
Kyra and Floyd only officially met during book 2.
Kyra passed by Floyd a bunch of times before— but never actually ‘saw’ him. Floyd on the other hand, already had an opinion of Kyra.
Seeing her just simply standing by the sidelines again and saying nothing and just… Staring. He decided to finally approach her straight up.
Deciding to give her a squeeze for the fun of it— he didn’t expect at all for her to hug him back and basically turn the situation on him instead. It flustered him, and made him walk away from the whole scene out of confusion and embarrassment.
Despite everything, Kyra thought Floyd was amusing. and insanely pretty.
Building Interest …
As time passed they seemed to keep catching glimpses of eachother. And with each passing day, she seemed to get more and more... Interesting.
Facing overblots despite having no magic, causing trouble left and right and getting into such ridiculous situations it makes you wonder how she does everything she does without getting tired of how absurd it all is.
When his first impression of her was her being ‘boring', his second was her being naive. How else could you explain it? She had to be either ridiculously brave or incredibly stupid and naive to do the things that she does.
Kyra, however, noticed Floyd from time to time. She noticed how he’d say and do things without caring how other people viewed him. He did things because he wants to, and doesn’t because he doesn’t want to.
He was so… Free. So unapologetically himself. So full of life, and genuinity. He was alive. Kyra couldn’t help but be a little jealous… Couldn’t help but admire him. Because everytime she looked at him, and saw him… Being him, she always wondered: Could I be like that, too?
Kyra and Floyd don’t have any notable interactions until the main events of Book 3.
When Kyra decided to strike up a deal with Azul to free all of the students under a contract— Floyd thought she was stupid. Naive, and way too easy of a target. It was laughable. It basically confirmed everything he thought of her.
As Floyd and Jade were monitoring Kyra and Grim as they packed up their things, Kyra acted as if nothing major was happening. Talking to them and cracking jokes like they were old friends. It was then Floyd and Kyra found out they might be more similar than they thought, saying the same things at the same time and holding the same opinions.
When Kyra almost dropped a bag of her things, Floyd helped from impulse. He laughed it off, but Kyra decided to give him a kiss on the cheek as a ‘thank you’.
He froze in place. Not expecting that kind of reaction from her once again, and just kind of… Staring at her as she passed. Jade had another laugh at his brother.
When Kyra first saw Floyd in his merform, he took the chance to try and scare her a little. Just for fun. But just like before— it totally backfired, and Kyra just looked at her with the same wonder as she did the first time. She had the nerve to call him ‘Beautiful’ under her breath, too.
So, Floyd simply swam away after realizing she wasn’t going to give him the reaction he wanted, deciding to play with someone who will.
But when he tried to attack a nearby friend of hers— She punched him straight in the face! A fire burning in her eyes as she straight up threatened him.
Floyd was… Confused. Confused about Kyra, i mean. One moment she was staring at him like he was a of work of art, the next shes throwing hands at him with zero hesitation. He thought she was a pushover— but maybe he was wrong.
She had guts, though. Thats for sure. A magicless little thing like her deciding to put her hands up and fight, even threatening him? A 13ft long eelmer that could rip her apart without a sweat? Something about it.. Scared him a little. Ending up with a bloodied nose, staring down someone who didn’t show any fear or any regret.
Floyd always wanted a challenge. But did he expect that challenge to come in a 5’7 package, decorated with pretty pink bows? No, not at all.
But thats something. And boy, does Floyd love the thrill of the unexpected. After this interaction that past intrigue he had in her before came back 2 times stronger.
It only worsened when Kyra’s little plan to destroy Azul’s contracts actually worked… And Floyd got chills seeing the look on her face.
It was so unlike what he thought of her. A big, smug grin. The face of someone who knows they already won. It was almost malicious. And it was then he realized— she wasn’t as dumb or as naive as he thought she was, either.
But when they got back to the Lounge, it so happened that Leona seemed to have missed one, single contract. When they spotted it, Kyra was the first to react. Managing to grab it before Azul.
Azul wasn’t too happy about it, screeching and yelling for her to give it to him, grabbing her while doing so.
And in that moment of tension, of fear and action, she did something that shocked everyone. In the face of danger, she held the sole contract tightly in her hands and she—
…She ate the contract.
She shoved the glowing papering in her mouth, and swallowed the thing. And it worked. Honestly they didn’t know which was more ridiculous… Her decision, or the fact it was a success.
She grinned so widely, so proudly. She had the nerve to even laugh in Azul’s face. “Yeah, thats right! Screw you, octoboy!”
Floyd couldn’t surpress the laughter that bubbled up his throat watching it all go down. The sound of her laugh ringing in his ears. It was just so… Ridiculous. She was ridiculous.
She had just outsmarted Azul… And the best solution she could think of was to eat the contract? It was downright cartoonish!
But when Azul overblotted, Floyd got to see Kyra in action. He was surprised all over again. But he should be used to it by now, he should expect it. She just keeps surprising him.
She was no pushover— rising up to the challenge when needed. Even if she still acted unserious, even if she acted goofy and wild, she still got down to business and made it work nonetheless.
And he realized she wasn’t anything like what he thought of her before. She was… Nothing like what he thought. Always surpassing his expectations of her no matter how much they changed.
Everytime he thought he had her figured out, she goes and does something that makes him rethink it all over again…
She was very, very interesting. And now, shes got his full attention.
Strangers to Besties!
After the main events of Book 3, Floyd had started following around Kyra more often. Actually, scratch that. He started following her around constantly. She eventually apologized for punching him in the face, too. Surprisingly.
Realizing they were actually very similar, they began hanging out more and more, until they eventually became an inseperable duo that everyone knew about.
At first, most were surprised. Kyra had only just started coming out of her shell, so most were still under the impression she was a sweet, mild mannered young girl.
But after befriending Floyd— all of her self-control truly did go flying out of the window. If she was bad before, she was even worse now. Freely skipping classes more often without a care to go find Floyd, trying to juggle live fish in the courtyard, or jumping out of a window just to escape some of the staff. and the like.
Late night adventures, dancing in the rain, sneaking out of class, spontaneous hang outs and sleepovers, pulling pranks and causing trouble left and right… They were so in sync, its was scary. Kyra was almost like a second Floyd, and everyone knew that it was probably best to run in the other direction when you see them side by side.
No matter what the situation, they always had eachother’s back, too.
It was strange to think they were ever strangers. They felt like they’ve known eachother for years— thats how well they’ve grown to know eachother. They were as thick as thieves!
Hanging out everyday, whenever they could, they just had so much fun together all the time!
To everyone’s dismay, of course. They were far too in sync, if the chaos around one of them was bad it combined when they were together.
Floyd finally found someone who could keep up with him, and even better, keep him on his toes. Kyra surprised him everyday, and thats what he loved. He found someone who understood him, too.
Kyra on the otherhand, found someone who encouraged all of her once repressed desires. She found someone she could be herself with, with no fear of judgement.
Never one without the other, those two. Wherever Kyra was Floyd was surely close to follow, and wherever Floyd was Kyra was most definetly near. They followed eachother around, always stayed close to one another.
Slowly, they’ve grown to not only seek eachother out to go and have fun, but also for comfort.
Platonic ..?
What started as a simple friendship which focused on the high of ‘having fun’ and causing trouble, or just basically being partners in crime— slowly turned into something much more… Intimate.
When Floyd stormed all the way to Ramshackle after a bad day at Mostro Lounge, he didn’t really know what to expect, he just wanted to get away from everyone else and Ramshackle was the best place he could think of.
He didn’t expect Kyra to be so caring. Pulling him into her arms and running her fingers through his hair while encouraging him to rant.
Kyra had always been an affectionate person, he knew that. It started small— little kisses on the cheek and forehead from Kyra to him, hugs and the like. But this was different. It felt different, atleast.
The way she held him felt different, and the way her lips gently kissed his skin made all of the stress from before sizzle into nothing.
He couldn’t help but melt, and before they knew it this became a routine for them, too.
They grew to find themselves comfortable being vulnerable around eachother. Showing sides of themselves to eachother most wouldn’t see. And they knew eachother better than anyone else did.
Simple, friendly touches became something more. The playful wrap of Floyd’s arm around her waist became tighter, and Kyra’s touches on him lingered for longer. Suddenly the playful ‘I Love You’s didn’t seem platonic anymore— atleast not with the way they looked at eachother while they said it.
Simply seeking eachother out to go cause chaos turned into seeking eachother out to just simply be in eachother’s presence instead. Whatever activity they did started to come second, and as long as they were together they were as happy as could be.
Of course, they never recognized this change. In their point of view, they’ve always been like this. But everyone else can see as plain as day, that something definetly changed.
It was painful for everyone involved, really. For some reason neither of them seemed to acknowledge the obvious feelings between eachother.
Everyone could see the way they looked at eachother, the way they acted around eachother… Everything was so painfully blatant… But they still couldn’t admit it. Even when the lines between friendship and intimacy began to blur.
Realizations!
Nothing about their relationship really changed at this point. They just kind of realized their romantic feelings after being deep in denial for WAYY too long.
The first to realize their feelings was actually Kyra, believe it or not. Which is funny because shes never been the best at realizing her own emotions in general.
It happened when Floyd said something that struck her with that arrow of realization. She asked one day, why exactly does he hang around her, asking if it was because she was pretty. She was only half joking, there was a part of her that genuinely wondered why he stuck around her for so long. Even she didn’t expect this friendship to last… But it did. And she can’t imagine her life without him in it anymore.
And thats exactly why she asked. Though she was smiling, she was somewhat scared of what he’d say.
“What? ‘Course not. Why’d I ever care about something as stupid as that?”
That shocked Kyra straight to her core. It was something so simple, yet it was new to her. She, who has never been valued for anything other than her beauty.
For a moment, that facade of false bravado faded, it cracked and her smile dropped. Genuinely surprised at how quickly he answered, and how honest he seemed while saying it.
“I like you because you’re fun. I don’t give a damn about how pretty you are, if you were boring I would’ve ditched ya a long time ago! Hahaha!”
She couldn’t do anything but stare. “…You think i’m fun?” “Well— Yeah. The most fun person I’ve ever met. I’ve never gotten bored with ya, Sea Angel!“ again, it was something so simple. Almost childish, in a way.
But yet… Something like that made her heart race faster than it did when facing any kind of danger.
She swears her heart was trying to escape from her chest with how fast and how hard it was beating against her ribcage. And her stomach began to turn… Is this what they call ‘getting butterflies’?
To know that her favorite person in the world truly didn’t care about what she looked like… That for once, her beauty never mattered? That he’d never cared for it?
Again, it was so simple. Honestly it was basic human decency, but to know something like that after a life of being seen as a pretty object to oggle at, it was so, so refreshing.
But… Just as it was the first time her heart raced… It was one of the first times she was truly scared.
She was definetly panicked about it, and decided to not say a word of it to anyone. She didn’t want to ruin the friendship they had, after all he was her dearest friend. So she kept her mouth shut and continued on pretending like it was nothing.
She felt selfish having such feelings. She felt as if she didn’t deserve him, like he deserved better than her because she grew up thinking she must be unlovable. And so she kept quiet for the sake of him, too. She thought it was best for the both of them. (<- LIARRRRR!!!!!!)
Kyra had thought she did a good job at keeping everyone at arm’s length— but when she turned around she found herself in his arms instead.
She spent her entire life building up walls that were taller than her, to hide her true self from everyone else. To hide how she really feels. But, Floyd went and teared down all of those well-built walls without her even realizing it.
She never expected someone to ever be able to see her as something more than her appearance. She never thought anyone could look past the surface everyone saw as “her”. But…
Floyd… He made her feel… Normal. He made her feel human. He didn’t seem to care much about how she looked at all and that… Made her really, really happy. But still, even then. He still deserved better.
He deserved more than someone as empty as her.
So, she pretended those feelings didn’t exist. Or, atleast she tried to…
She was honestly a mess. Usually she was so comfortable doing the things they always do together. Holding hands, kissing eachother’s faces, cuddling— but now that she knows how she really feels ??? Oh, shes struggling so SO hard to keep her cool.
Shes always been good at hiding her emotions. But shes never been in love before, and its all so new to her that she doesnt know how to handle it.
In a way its somewhat overwhelming. Although she does a rather good job at keeping her inner turmoil hidden, shes still freaking out internally.
Shes still able to keep up their whole dynamic, its just now, its a little harder. Since now she had to fight back the blush that threatens to stain her skin. How embarrassing…
(She totally giggles and kicks her feet about him once shes alone btw LMFAOOO) (then immediately feels guilty after HELP)
Floyd realized a little later, it kind of just hit him one day. They weren’t doing anything in particular, he just looked at her and went “Oh. Ohhh.”
Like a lightbulb went off in his head. He didn’t say anything about it either for awhile. Eels are cowards, after all. And he didn’t know if she felt the same. So he just decided to act like nothing happened, continued this routine of theirs that they’ve grown attatched to.
Maybe there were afew times where they wanted to say something about it, to finally admit the unspoken thoughts they’ve had kept in the back of their minds… But they never go through with it. Always backing out last minute, brushing it off.
The two were cowards, dancing around their mutual feelings. Unsure of how the other felt, so they decided to just leave it all unsaid. Even if the look in their eyes said otherwise.
Saying they were just “best friends” was just so much easier. It was what they were used to, what they were comfortable with. It was easier to brush it all off as them being comfortable eachother, sharing beds and exchanging gentle touches. It was all platonic, of course!
…Though Floyd was hesitant with his own feelings. He never expected to find someone that captured his interest so much… Yet he wondered, was he ready to commit?
Strangely, there was no doubt in his mind. It was yes, it always was, yes. The moment he asked himself that question he answered it immediately at the same time.
Of course, because he realized if it was Kyra, there wasn’t anything he wouldn’t do. Man, when did he get so whipped for such a silly shrimpy?
Merfolk only choose one mate for life. And Floyd is sure he wanted his to be Kyra.
He was scared of course after realizing his own feelings. Besides Azul and Jade, he's never let anyone get this close to him. It was strange letting Kyra in like this. He didn't plan on her, not at first at least. but now that he has her, he wants to keep her forever.
Man, she just kept surprising him, huh? He never even thought he could feel so deeply for someone. But hes so glad that he found her, that they found eachother.
Difficulties…
When Kyra left with Epel, Rook and Elena during Book 6, Floyd was upset.
Thats an understatement, really. He was furstrated, worried, and somehow he even felt betrayed.
Why didn’t she tell him? Why didn’t she take him with her? Doesn’t she know its dangerous?
He knows Kyra can take care of herself, he knows shes capable and he knows she can defend herself. But that doesn’t stop him from worrying.
Throughout the span that shes gone Floyd is restless. Hes snappier, hes moodier and he cant seem to stop pacing around no matter how hard he tries.
But when Kyra gets back— he completely ignores her.
Kyra was so very confused. Actually, everyone was. This was a first for the two of them. Honestly, Kyra expected him to run towards her just like he always does. But he doesn’t.
Kyra is back, but that doesn’t change his mood. If anything, it worsens. And Kyra doesn’t have a clue why! Everytime she tries to approach him, he just turns his heel and walks away. And hes never looked at her like… that..
Kyra is a total mess. And suddenly shes not as good as keeping her real feelings at bay like she usually is. She wondered if she did something wrong? Said something wrong? Was he finally sick of her? And that was when she realized— she was terrified of the thought of losing him.
In desperation she went to Jade. Maybe she should’ve asked Elena for advice instead, but before she knew it she was sat infront of Jade, asking for help with his brother.
If anything, Jade seemed amused with her situation. Of course he did. But with a mischevious twinkle in his eye, she had a feeling he had a scheme brewing up in his head.
Maybe she should’ve known better than to trust Jade… But she didn’t really have a choice, or so she thought as much.
Something about this situation felt so… Deliberate. She couldn’t quite put her finger on it, but it seemed like he knew she’d come to him for help sooner or later.
After giving Kyra some advice and words of encouragement, he did something rather out of character of him. Bringing into a hug, he held her rather close to himself.
Kyra didn’t really notice this, and accepted the hug with no hesitation. Wrapping her arms around him and sighing as she melted into the well-needed hug.
Little did she know, Jade’s eyes were glued onto his brother’s figure, looming by the doorframe with a scowl on his face. It made Jade chuckle, deciding to tighten her arms around Kyra juust a little more to see what he’d do.
Of course, Floyd wasn’t happy about it. Now, Floyd is not a jealous person by any means. He has better things to focus on, other things to keep him entertained. But at moments like these, when hes already in a bad mood, he can’t help that primal instict, its in his blood after all. A moray is a moray.
Tearing her away from Jade, he drags her to somewhere else. Leaving a very amused Jade watching them leave.
And so, an argument occurs !!! Its a back and forth, Floyd mad about what he just saw, Kyra trying to explain the situation then her getting mad at him back for avoiding her like the plague.
It ended up with Floyd admitting he was mad because she didn’t tell him about her going with them, but at the same time he was mad at himself for not being able to be with her then.
Kyra realizes that, yeah, she probably shouldve let him know she was going. But she couldn’t just brush off the fact he hurt her by doing what he did, shes grown enough as a person at this point to not let her own feelings go unheard.
Reconcilliation!!! They both apologize and promise to do better, and what better way to catch up on lost time than a sleepover??
Best believe that after they made up, they went back to their normal selves as if nothing happened— actually, maybe even worse with how much clingier they are. They seriously missed eachother, seeing how much they stuck together. 😭
“Home”?
When Kyra got news of the possibility of finding a way back to her home she was in shambles. So very conflicted between the place she called home and the place she felt was home.
She knew she had to leave some day. She knew this freedom she had was temporary. She knew one day, she’d have to go back to the life she grew to despise, the life that was never hers.
She didn’t want to leave, though. Of course she didn’t. But still, she didn’t really have a choice.
She decided she wouldn’t do the same mistake and leave Floyd out of the loop. If anyone deserves to know first, its probably him.
And so, while theyre sitting on the rooftop of Ramshackle she mentions it. And Floyd is… Upset. Of course he is. Hes beyond upset, really. He just got his best friend back, now hes hearing she might be going away again? For good? Forever?
No way. He couldnt accept that, there was no way he could. But before he could even say anything— Kyra spoke first.
“I don’t want to go back. I really, really don’t.”
“…You don’t? Huh? Why?” There was a wave of relief that crashed over Floyd when he heard those words fall from her lips, his eyes glued onto the girl beside him. Hanging onto every word she says. “No. Its just… Its not my home, atleast not anymore. I dont think it is.”
“I think, this is my home now.” She chuckles, eyes glued down to the ground below. “…Because you’re here.” She says, turning to look at him. She spoke in that tone that she only used behind closed doors. When no one was looking. That soft, sweet voice she used whenever she carded her fingers through his hair and whispered sweet nothings to him until he fell asleep. It wasn’t unauthetic like the voice she used when they first met— no, it was genuine. Real. Full of adoration, of fondness. Her gaze held so much love.
“…Hah, what’re you gettin’ all sappy for, Sea Angel? Thats so cringe.” He laughed, but his heart soared. Even if it was cheesey, he couldnt help but swoon with just the way she looked at him. Like he was the most beautiful thing in the world. She always said he was the prettiest boy in the world.
She moved forward, her face leaning ever so close to his, so close he could see every line and curve of her features. He laughed at first, “Hey, what’cha tryna do, huh? What? Do I have somethin’ on my face?” He joked, but she didn’t respond. It looked like she was thinking, like she was deep in thought. “…Kyra?”
Her name left his lips for what was the first time. Hanging in the air like a silent prayer of longing, of want. And her own lips met his. Capturing it in a sweet, sudden kiss.
Time seemed to have stopped. It always felt like that when they were together, but this was different. Nothing could prepare him for that— hell, he didn’t even get the chance to kiss her back, the moment felt as if it went on forever but it was over too quickly all the same.
There was a flash of realization on Kyra’s face as her cheeks flushed a red that could rival Riddle on a rampage. Stumbling and stuttering, she couldn’t handle the embarrassment, and before he could even say anything she ran away. Leaving him on the rooftop, wide eyes and a stomach full of butterflies.
Yeah. Kyra is really stupid sometimes.
After that whole thing, she ran to Leona to let out her thoughts. He listened, though he said he ‘didn’t have a choice anyway’.
“So… You kissed him then you just.. Ran? Seriously?” “I PANICKED!!!”
Floyd and Kyra don’t really interact until Malleus’ overblot. And during the time they’re in Floyd’s dream, shes hoping he doesn’t bring up what happened at the rooftop.
Choose.
Okay soo, lets say that they really do find a way to send Kyra back home !!! Not just a possibility anymore, its there and now she actually has to choose.
Of course, the decision was already made a long time ago. She knew from the very beginning she’d have to go home, but she doesn’t want to. Not at all.
Floyd is the most upset about this, to no ones surprise. Is she seriously just going to get up and leave? Just like that?
All of those moments together, all of those times they shared… Did it mean nothing to her? At all?
“I’ll always be right by your side!” Liar. If that were true, she wouldn’t be leaving.
“I’ve never met anyone like you, you’re the best person ever!” Then why are you choosing to leave?
“You can always count on me, alright? I’ll be here for ya, no matter when or where.” —Liar. ��Its okay, let it all out. Im here for you.” Liar.
“Mm, after we graduate… Wouldn’t it be fun to live together? Haha, I just couldn’t imagine a day without you in it.” Liar.
“I love you, Floydie!” Liar. Liar liar liar liar.
All those times, everything she’s ever said that stuck to him like glue, it all came rushing back to him. Yet instead of the warmth and fondness it usually brought to his heart, it instead felt cold. It felt like betrayal, cold and cruel.
How could she do that? Say all those things then just leave like it all meant nothing? How could she leave like they didn’t share all those memories together? As if they never held eachother through the cold nights and whispered sweet nothings? Giggled like little kids while peppering kisses on eachother’s faces, ditching classes to go have a day out in town— kissing on the rooftop?
How could she leave just like that? Like it all meant nothing. Like he meant nothing, to her?
To say he was angry was an understatement. He was that and more, a raging storm of emotions, and Floyd has never been one to control them the best.
Unlike what happened after Book 6, this time Floyd confronts her directly. It ends up as an argument, Floyd not understanding why shes choosing to leave Twisted Wonderland if she doesn’t actually want to, and Kyra not wanting to “bother” Floyd with how she truly feels.
Kyra keeps her reasons secret, mostly. Just as she does with the rest of who she is. She wants to tell him, she really does. She hates having to keep things from him but she thinks its for the best.
She just wants the best for him, and she thinks that her leaving will be better for him. So she won’t be a bother anymore, so he wouldn’t have to worry about her anymore.
While Floyd doesn’t understand why Kyra is choosing to leave, Kyra doesn’t understand why Floyd is so upset about her leaving.
Why is he so persistent? This is for the better. They’ve had good times and god, will she miss it all dearly. Not just miss it, but yearn to relive their time together again, and again, and again.
Kyra doesn’t truly understand how much she actually means to Floyd. Its never even been a possibility to her that he could ever love her more than a friend.
And so, they have another argument. And unlike the last one, it doesn’t end as well. They end off on a rather bad note, Floyd saying something that he really shouldn’t have and leaving Kyra all by herself.
She didn’t cry, but god did she want to.
…Cue ink dripping cutscene here!!
Overblot.
…Yeah. Kyra overblots… (and Floyd is one of the direct reasons why LMAO)
How does Kyra overblot despite having no magic???????? Uhhhhhhh, idk plot !!!! Plot stuff !!! Plot armor !!!!!!! Something something absorbing magic from overblots n stuff blah blah blah ….
While I’m not exactly sure what happens during this, I know it happens right before shes meant to go back to her home world.
For context, I’ll try to summarize the reasons she overblots.
Kyra had never lived for herself. From the moment she was born, she was already assigned her role in life: To be the perfect princess for her people.
Only ever valued for her beauty and her status, she grew up thinking she wasn’t human simply because of how most treated her. They praised her yet their love was conditional, only ‘loving’ her when shes ���perfect’. Only when shes ‘flawless’ like she should be. Which just meant to her that her true self must be unlovable.
She grew up lonely. Never let outside of the palace walls, she dreamed of a life of freedom she knew she would never have.
But, after waking up in Twisted Wonderland, that was exactly what she got. A life of freedom, where she began to discover her true self instead of the version of her that the public expected of her. Experiencing all of the things she never thought she would, and beginning to accept who she really is.
But of course, someone like her doesn’t deserve good things. Her birth is her biggest sin and she was meant to spend her entire life to try and repent for it. It didn’t matter how much she wanted something or how hard she fights for it— in the end, what she wants will never matter, because she doesn’t matter.
(Quote from Book 7 while talking to Malleus.)
Shes spent her whole life supressing her emotions. Building walls and hiding how she truly feels from everyone, regardless of how ‘close’ to her they are. Hiding how she feels, because she already feels like a burden with her being herself. Not wanting to bother anyone any further.
Kyra was healing. She was, she was getting better the longer she stayed in Twisted Wonderland— but all of that went down the drain once she got news of them finding a way for her to go “home”.
Everyone has her limits, and as much as Kyra tries to convince herself this is all for the better, there was no part of her that truly wanted to leave. And all of the sudden, all of those surpressed emotions from years past, comes bubbling up to the surface and bursting at the seams.
She explodes, because she doesn’t want to leave.
She ends up hurting not only herself but others during her overblot, Floyd being one of them. The two ending up very injured after the incident.
(FUNFACT!!!! The Adeuce duo were the ones to snap Kyra out of her overblot :3)
Tearful Confession.
After her overblot, Floyd was heavily injured. But that still didn’t stop him from making his way to the infirmary room where Kyra was. He paid no mind to the objections of others trying to convince him to calm down and rest, because after seeing Kyra like that, how could he rest?
He knew Kyra. Atleast, thats what he thought. But he was starting to think he didn’t anymore, and that made him even more frustrated.
Frustrated that she didn’t tell him anything, again, and frustrated that he didn’t realize just how much she was suffering all by herself.
Floyd was never the kind to make other people’s issues his own, but it was different this time. That was his Sea Angel, right? His partner in crime and best friend… The one he was sure he loves. How could he ever call himself a good mate if he couldn’t even tell she struggling that much?
He was angry, upset, sad and so worried all at the same time. A mix of emotions all swirling together in his chest and beating in his head, but they all told him to do the same thing: Find her.
Plus… That argument they had before she overblotted… He had to make up for it.
It didn’t matter if he had to limp and stumble and struggle all the way there, he’d crawl through hell and back if it meant he could be there for her. A kind of devotion he didn’t think he was even capable of, but he couldn’t imagine a thing he wouldn’t do for her anymore. Especially when he knows she’d do the exact same for him and more.
And honestly, knowing she’d do the same and more for him was exactly why he had to be there. She was so foolishly selfless at times, always putting others before herself. But not this time. Not anymore.
Eventually he made his way to her room, where she was still unconcious. Laying in the infirmary bed, looking so peaceful. She was a mess, though. Messy hair and bandages running across her body, wrapping her skin in white cloth.
He stayed there, sitting right beside her and gently laying her head atop her chest. Listening to her heartbeat. The steady rhythmn soothed him, and he eventually calmed down, putting a hand over hers as he waited until she woke up.
And she did. Awhile later, she wakes up and hes very happy and gives her a hug— but then he remembers his concerns and switches back to how he was earlier.
Floyd begins to ramble about why she didn’t tell him anything and why she just let herself get that bad. Did she not trust him? Why did she keep so many secrets from him when it felt like they never hid anything from eachother?
Kyra was somewhat confused on why he seemed to care so much. Well, mostly because she never thought anyone would really care about how she felt, being so used to her own feelings being brushed aside and shrugged off.
And then, he says it.
“Damn it!— I love you! I love you, okay? I love you so damn much but you keep doing stupid things like this!”
That makes her freeze. What is he saying?
He… Loves her? Someone like her? Someone as unlovable as her? Surely, he must be lying. He must be joking. There was simply no way that someone as wonderful as him could ever love someone as worthless as her.
He was full of life, of unexpected thrills. He was everything beautiful in life. He was electric, fun and adventurous. He was full of emotion and genuinity. Her? She was empty. A shell of someone that once was, a broken thing trying to learn to be alive too late. How could he love someone as unlovable as her? Someone who doubts her own humanity?
The words were so simple yet they held so much meaning. The way he was looking at her and holding her shoulders the mix of emotions in his eyes… She knew he wasn’t lying. After all, he was never the kind to lie about something like this.
And… She cries. For the first time, she breaks infront of him. Tears rolling down her cheeks like raindrops on a car window on a rainy day, she was trembling.
She shook her head, tried to deny it. She tried to convince him she wasn’t worth it. She wasn’t worthy of his love. She wasn’t worthy of the friendships shes made here in Twisted Wonderland, she wasn’t worthy of any of the good things shes received so selfishly.
She wasn’t good enough for him. How could he love someone like her? It didn’t make sense. None of it did. Atleast not to her.
Floyd couldn’t believe what he was hearing. If anything, he was almost speechless. But seeing her crumble like this right infront of him… Seeing the tears roll down her face and hearing the words coming out of her mouth… He was angry. Not at her, but to whoever made her feel like this.
To the ones who made her feel less than human.
He pulled her into a tight hug, “Thats not true. None of that is true. Stop it, just… Stop.” His grip on her was tight, and she realizes hes trembling just as much as her.
He could’ve lost her. That overblot was no joke, and seeing her like that… Oh, god… How could he say he loved her even after seeing her like that? After seeing her like this?
She was a mess. Teary eyes and snotty nosed, messy hair and wrapped in bandages, covered in wounds— both literally and figuratively.
He’s seen it all. Her real self, the one she was sure was unlovable. All of her ugly sides and now her darkest moment. The ugliest of all. She wants to push him away, she wants to beg him to leave, she doesn’t feel worthy of any of this, he was too good for her but…
She wanted to be selfish. She wanted to be selfish when it came to him, and she hated herself for it. No matter how much she told him to leave, his hold on her loosened, and he didn’t say a word.
After she settles down in his arms for awhile, he moves to look at her, a hand cupping her cheek and making her look at him properly.
The tears never stopped, he wondered just how long she’s been hurting like this and never told anyone. Never told him.
And… Slowly, he began to kiss away all her tears. Kyra froze, feeling his lips on her skin, gently kissing away all of the tears that fell from her eyes. Each touch filled with so much love and tenderness, it made her cry more, tears of happiness. How could he be this loving to her? It didn’t make sense. She didn’t understand.
“I love you,” he began to say over and over with each kiss. “S-stop…” Krya said inbetween sobs, but yet she didnt even struggle. If anything, she melted even more into his touch. She needed this… She needed him.
“I love how competetive ya are,” he just kept going. “Love how you look when you see somethin’ ya like.” And going, “I love seeing that stupid grin on your face when we’re about to go do somethin’ stupid,” and going.
He began to list off all the reasons he loved her, and…
“I love you, Kyra.” And she knew he meant it. She knew he meant everything he said, knew that he was being genuine and honest with her. No matter who you were, no one could replicate the way he looked at her at that moment, there was simply no way to feign emotions like that. She could feel all of the love pouring out of his words, his touch. And she knew, he loved her for her.
“How could you love someone like me…?” She sobbed out inbetween, her voice so meek and tiny. Shaky. Unlike her usual tone. “How could I not?” Was all he said. He said it so matter of factly, he couldn’t imagine not loving her.
By the end of it, Kyra was too speechless to respond with anything but… “I love you too.”
Finally giving in, Kyra hugged him back tightly, and before they knew it they were sharing a sweet kiss. Melting into eachother’s arms, and spending the entire day there, together.
And OHHH MYYY GOD FINALLY TBH. DAMN THE SLOWBURN WAS BURNINGG WITH THIS ONE !!!!!!!
“But, no more secrets, got it?” Floyd huffed, pinching Kyra’s cheek. “G-got it…” Kyra chuckled.
Kyra couldn’t help but wonder… How did she get so lucky?
“Its About Time!”
After Kyra’s choice of staying in Twisted Wonderland is confirmed, it was actually Professor Crewel and Paige that adopted her and sorted out all of her paperwork. So, now she had legal guardians, all of the needed paperwork, and basically everything she needed to stay in Twisted Wonderland without any issues.
AND Kyra and Floyd were officially in a relationship now!!!! YIPPEEEEE!!!!
Kyra is much happier now. And while theres still a twinge of guilt for not returning back to her home world, she was relieved that she was staying in her real home. Where she can truly be herself, surrounded by people who truly love her.
Kyra is still healing and trying to get better, and Floyd is right there as her biggest supporter.
Shes learning to be more open and honest about how she truly feels. And slowly but surely, she gets there.
Unapologetically showing and voicing how she really feels, and she even stopped surpressing her own moodswings.
Being with Floyd as lovers instead of just ‘best friends’ was honestly the best thing for her. Of course, there wasn’t much that actually changed between their dynamic, but still. Knowing someone like him truly loved and supported her made her unbelivably happy and hopeful.
…Though, for others, they somehow got even more annoying. And I say that with all the love in my heart LMAOO
Both Floyd and Kyra like to brag about eachother, and they somehow got even more clingy to eachother after getting to a relationship.
Seriously, its baaad 😭 do not seperate them or one of them will be biting people (/j)
Being together has allowed both of them to be completely vulnerable around someone. Although its new to the both of them… Its honestly refreshing. Its a good thing for both of them.
They make eachother better. (And worse.)
Funfacts!
Floyd was kind of scared of Kyra for a little while LMAOO 😭 shes a little TOO freaky …
Floyd has stayed over at Ramshackle so much that he’s has a bunch of stuff over there. An extra toothbrush, some changes of clothes, you name it. Its probably there. You can bet Floyd just lets himself into Ramshackle all the time, sometimes even in the middle of the night. But Kyra is always so chill about it 😭 (only because its Floyd HEHE)
Before they even started dating— behind closed doors they already acted like an old married couple 😭
Kyra and Floyd are lowkey super domestic behind closed doors, especially after a sleepover. Waking the other up with kisses ….. Helping eachother get ready for the day, helping eachother get dressed … Cooking together …….. theyre so sickening …………
Even if they aren’t with eachother all the time, they still manage to include eachother in their lives somehow. Whenever they go off on a solo-adventure, they always come back with some sort of trinket that reminded them of the other.
Speaking of, they’re both avid collectors of anything they deem cool enough. Random rocks, acorns, a lost penny, you name it. They like to show eachother the things they found throughout the day to eachother!
They have this silly little game Kyra started. She began hiding little sticky notes with sweet messages or a doodle and sometimes gifts in places she knows Floyd will find, and he’s started doing the same thing. Ever since then, its kind of become more like a competition on who can find the most sticky notes 😭
Kyra gets cuteness aggression from Floyd. Yeah thats it.
^^ she genuinely believes hes the cutest thing ever. Whatever u say queen!!!!
Floyd loves giving Kyra random gifts out of nowhere. The gifts can range from ‘a cool rock’ to a designer jacket. Kyra doesnt know which she prefers HAHAHA
Kyra herself prefers handmade gifts, so she loves to make Floyd pieces of jewelry and clothing! Shes always so proud whenever she sees him wearing something she made :3
Floyd and Kyra have been kicked out of class several times for laughing too hard.
They admitted to eachother before they even started dating that they couldn’t imagine their life without the other… can they pls take the hint omg
Floyd always feels super bad whenever he loses control of his temper around Kyra. One time he snapped at her, and he immediately apologized 😭 he told her to slap him if he ever did that again, hugged her so tight too and Kyra honestly found it so cute 😭
Floyd always perks up whenever he realizes Kyra is close by, always running straight to her. Kyra does the same thing and quite literally jumps into his arms.
Both Kyra and Floyd’s main love language is physical touch!! But Kyra loves to compliment him all the time, and Floyd loves gift giving :3
Kyra always greets Floyd with a kiss on the cheek. Yeah she started doing this before they were event dating im afraid ….
Kyra and Floyd love to read together at night, though Kyra usually falls asleep first AHAHAHA
But !! Kyra is also the first to wake up more often than not, and always wakes Floyd up with butterfly kisses on his face :3
Floyd convinced Azul to add some of Kyra’s favorite foods to the menu of Mostro Lounge just to get her to come visit more often
Kyra fights anyone that bad-mouths Floyd. Floyd doesnt know whether to find it cute or annoyed that she keeps getting herself hurt 😭
^^ SPEAKING OF, Kyra literally unlocked a much more caring side of Floyd with her being so accident-prone 😭 girlie got herself injured so much FLOYD had to step in smh …
Floyd is the kinda guy to carry Kyra if her feet started to hurt while walking or if she sprains an ankle teehee
They’re both banned from an arcade in town after they broke a claw machine and stole all the plushies inside. And other things but that isnt as important.
When Floyd feels like hanging out with her, he’ll look for her around campus then just throw her over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes then just walks away. Kyra never struggles or objects and kind of just … accepts her fate 😭
Rambling…
Kyra grew up thinking the love she received will always be conditional. That she always needed to live up to some sort of expectation, and so she created a ‘perfect’ persona in order to do just that.
She still keeps that persona from the Prologue to Book 1, but begins to break away from it during Book 2– but while in her past she was only loved for the version of herself she created for others— it was the opposite with Floyd.
He disliked her so-called ‘persona’, but fell so deeply in love with her real self.
^^ she was very confused, yet so very happy.
Floyd thinks everything is fun as long as Kyra is with him <3
Kyra only ever started showing her more vulnerable side to Floyd during her character development. He was the very first to ever see her break away from the unbothered act she always put on.
Floyd was never one to let himself be so soft and vulnerable around anyone, ever. But strangely, he lets his guard down around Kyra. Kyra knows of the much gentler side to him, and she adores it so very much.
Kyra is extremely understanding and patient of Floyd and his mood swings. She knows he’d never intentionally hurt her, and always knows just how to cheer him up. Whether with a silly joke, a spontaneous adventure or just lying in bed with him in her arms.
Kyra trusts Floyd with her LIFE. She trusts him so much its ridiculous. No matter what the situation, she always feels like she can rely on him… But she wont trust him with her food. Or her plushies.
Extra: Incorrect Quotes (?)
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I have more on my 🎀! twst shennanigans tag lol
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pigeonxp · 2 months ago
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ok now that bt is FINALLY bones, all i really have to say is fuck yall for real. there are some of yall that arent that bad, but the overwhelming majority of you guys are actually fucking awful. i have had twitter mutuals be harassed by yall, i have had friends harassed, ive seen people i dont even follow being called horrific things and insulting their appearances, and so so much more. one thing that really sticks out is the blatant misogyny that some of you guys present. the amount of men that have gone online and confidently called women bitches and sluts and whores and cunts and hoes is genuinely fucking deranged, and i hope you all know that. there have been bt stans in my replies and my inbox and in my business, telling me that IM in the wrong for stating my opinions on the weird ass shit theyve been doing, telling me that they "dont feel welcome" in this fandom, and that they feel like this fandom is toxic and etc etc etc etc I DONT CARE BRO. i have said it once and ill say it again and again. some of you guys are just not meant to be in fandom spaces. there are block buttons for a reason. you can block people and tags and literally everything under the sun but you continue to SEEK OUT shit that makes you mad or that you dont agree with just so you can hate on the OPs in their replies. you dont seem to understand that people can have opinions on what characters they like and what ships they enjoy, and that other people have the right to criticize them. i am NOT sorry and i will NOT apologize for how i may have reacted. i do NOT feel bad for you. we all told you that this wasnt going to last, the showeunner said it wasnt going to last. the ACTOR said it wasnt going to last. and instead of using critical thinking skills and media literacy training, you got tattoos for this ship, you spent hundreds of dollars on cameos from a nepo baby, and you spent days of your lives hating on and harassing people over a FICTIONAL TV SHOW. instead of being upset at LFJR for leading yall on, you attacked oliver stark for being "biphobic"??@?!?!??!!??!÷*×(!&×,@ for having an opinion on his own character, especially after he spent time becoming genuinely one of the biggest bisexual allies i have ever seen. after he told reporters that he was planning on playing buck as bi anyway, after he made post after post saying how excited he was for bucks storyline, and after he advocated for this character he loves so dearly. you jumped down his throat for no reason. i have absolutely no sympathy for you. i really do hope you follow lfjr back to SWAT and i truly hope he gets every single line and every single scene just to keep him off of my fucking screen. 🫶
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doberbutts · 3 months ago
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hello jaz, i'd like your opinion on something. i'm seeing a lot of dog trainers online go on about the benefits of crating in regards to making sure dogs are getting enough sleep and to always crate them when asleep. the numbers i see thrown around are 12-14 but more commonly 16-18. i have certainly seen a lot of improvement when i make sure my adolescent is getting enough sleep, but she is not crate trained (its really rare where im from) a lot of the advice on making sure the dog is settling is to isolate the dog, cover the crate in a different room and avoid coming anywhere near it, basically pretend they dont exist. im finding it really hard to justify locking up a social animal for 16-18 hours a day without any interraction. i specifically got a dog after years of having a cat (he was really sweet and loved companionship but it didnt hit the same spot as having a dog), as i like how engaged they are with you and seek interraction, it just feels unfair. am i antropomorphizing? is it not that big of a deal if they're properly enriched and excercised? what are your thoughts on this as a dog trainer and someone who had a dog with medical issues related to excessive crating?
Oh oh oh oh I had a very long conversation with a few good friends who are dog trainers about this one.
Now before I start, I do have to say that I do support crate training and in fact have crate trained the majority of my dogs, with Fenris being the sole exception and even he is, hmm, half crate trained at this point and we're working on the rest.
First of all 18 hours is an astronomical number, personally I think 12 hours is excessive. Life shoved in a small box for literally half the day is sort of miserable. I now work 10 hour shifts with an hour commute and so my dogs *are* left home for 12 hours at a time- however I have made a lot of changes to the way I contain them to prevent this exact scenario. Sushi is loose, the chihuahuas are crated together in something that is roughly the size of a typical x-pen or they're left loose in my bathroom (where it is easier to clean up Tater's incontinence), and Fenris is also sectioned off in my foyer again a space the size of a typical x-pen. Sometimes I leave Sushi in there with him because he seems comforted by her presence and ability to play with him if he's bored, other times she seems kind of done managing his energy on her own so I give her the run of the house to give her a bit of a break.
And, I will say, based on the camera I have looking in at them, the dogs mostly sleep the whole day. The last two days most of the peeks in during a motion alert have revealed someone getting up for a drink of water and then plopping back down on their bed. Or getting a toy or chew to bring back to their bed. Or getting up to stretch and laying back down. So, while I feel bad that I leave them alone for that long, it's also not like they're doing much in my absence.
However to me it is less about the crate and more about the ability to perform natural behaviors. As said, the dogs get up and have a drink of water, stretch, maybe wrestle if they're sectioned off two-by-two, or grab a toy or chew (or blanket to suck in the case of Fenwen), which are all things they could do in a large enough crate. It is also why, once my dogs are house trained, I keep them in crates far bigger than recommended so they can have a bit more space to move around. This is, of course, easier with the chihuahuas who weigh a combined 8lbs than with the 100lb mountain dog. Or they can be loose if they're nondestructive and won't soil my floors.
However I also think that it becomes really difficult when we talk about how dogs are social creatures. Like it or not, by leaving them alone for 8+ hours every day, we are dooming single dog households to a lifetime of solitary confinement. Whether the dogs are in a crate or not, we are leaving a social creature alone for the majority of our waking hours. So I think it is important, if you don't have multiple dogs or rotating work schedules with all the humans in the house, to make sure and fill the gaps as much as possible. I think if you are home your dog should be out of confinement and also hanging out with you. I think you should deliberately try to interact with your dog while you are home, whether that's just petting as you do something else or taking them for a walk or whatever.
I mentioned that Fenris is not fully crate trained despite being nearly a year and a half. This is because he can open just about anything that doesn't require thumbs, including crate doors. And he has broken himself out of 3 separate crates, and broke 2 teeth in the process the last time he broke out. I have been slowly re-introducing the crate ever since, and now he is calm and quiet in a jumbo sized Great Dane crate (read: two sizes up from what is recommended for him) with a bed, a sucky blanket, a toy, a chew, and his EDM music box for about 4ish hours at a time. This is a big win for us because he used to not even tolerate a few minutes despite me following all of the same rules and advice I have followed for all of my other successfully crate trained dogs.
I noticed fairly early on that he is happiest when contained in a larger area with a friend. So my foyer and Sushi became the sacrifice until I either can convince him to tolerate longer than half days or can trust him left loose in my house. He did figure out how to open the gate a few weeks ago and promptly murdered my 32 year old snake plant (and destroyed a tupperware container left on my counter, and shredded my mail also from my counter, and pulled a book off my bookshelf to shred, and chewed on my camera but it does still work at least), so clearly he is not trustworthy as of just yet. I have added a locking mechanism that requires thumbs, he fiddled with it the first day I installed it and has left it alone since.
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maythedreadwolftakeyou · 11 days ago
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(DATV thoughts with spoilers ahead; i think my tags will keep it filtered but just in case it doesn't since i dont want this in the actual game tags)
i just... man. i don't have a well formulated thought for this yet (and its my PERSONAL OPINION and other people can feel as different as they want, this is not an attack) but it keeps bouncing around my head, so. i know the popular thing right now is coming up with in-universe justifications for The Pantry Almost-Kiss Scene in ways that imply Lucanis didn't mean it/it doesn't represent him as a person/he was Faking It.
and i just don't like any of them. they make me sad!!!!!! i don't like the idea that one of the like 4 romance scenes we get in this game is him Pretending in some way, even if he does at that point like Rook back at least somewhat. None of the justifications i've seen make me feel Better about that being the point where we declare him as a romantic interest, which is what it is in the game, functionally. It doesn't lock you in yet but that point IS where the game says "they will take your flirting more seriously now". I did those same scenes for Davrin, Emmrich, and Taash and this is the formula the game uses (the "interrupted almost-kiss/confession" happens for almost all of the companions).
so if the answer for Lucanis' is "actually he stopped because he Didn't like what he was doing/feel that way yet" or that he felt he had to pretend for Rook's sake... it's kind of a letdown you know? esspecially when it comes right after what seems like an actually authentic moment (dispelling his "perfectly gathered clouds of doom"). Because, at that point in the game from my/Rook's perspective, it was like he finally was reciprocating. It made me hope that he'd acknowledge whatever was between him & Rook more in future scenes, especially because you get so little else from him at any other point, in terms of flirting back/showing you he IS interested. like up to that point I felt kind of bad for continuing to flirt at him, when he'd just change the subject right after! if someone did that in real life i would take it as a hint to stop. This is pixels and not real people so I didn't but they have done "reluctant/fearful interest" better in other characters if that's truly what they were going for in this one.
so after finishing the romance and getting the rest of content... idk. I don't like saying "one of the major chunks of characterization we get needs to be Thrown Out Actually because he was Pretending". because it's not like he or Rook ever actually address it in game--you just don't get to talk about feelings until some dialogue choices only in the act 3 romance scene, and then his speech at endgame (not even a full conversation, so much as his personal declaration). like it takes until the VERY end of the game for him to say the thing about "he was afraid to want you", but that comes after you've already hooked up, even.
I think truly what annoys me is that it's a story choice that can only make sense in HINDSIGHT not AS PLAYING. Only once you have all the scenes can you say "this one is out of character" and then you either have to accept it as bad writing, or come up with some in-universe justification to explain it... and so far none of the in universe ones feel good to me. i wish they did because maybe then I'd be less annoyed, rip. but at the end of the day i think even if there was some intent there, it was a poor choice for his story arc, because it doesn't effectively convey anything... and the reason why we can project a lot of different explanations onto it is simply because it is never addressed again (and again, Lucanis Dellamorte is NOT A PERSON he is a CHARACTER used to further a story for you the player, and so the reasons I don't like this choice are story-level and not a dig at how real life people feel or act).
So yeah at the end of the day. that is simply not a narrative device I would ever personally use in this way on a player/reader. certain kinds of hindsight revelations have their place (see: what the devs tried to do with Varric though I also think that falls apart on close inspection, but at least it has justification in-universe), but for a romance it just makes me embarrassed for Rook. In a game where you don't have nearly as many back-and-forth conversations with characters and have to resort to eavesdropping on them talking to each other, it's sad that one of the like 5 times you actually get to talk to Lucanis one on one we're maybe supposed to believe he wasn't being authentic, and also that Rook can't respond to this ever. It would be different if it had any kind of follow up, imo. or honestly as i've said before i would rather it have been swapped out with something entirely different or where we get to talk about their feelings instead, before i get labeled as one of the "people mad he's not Zevran 2.0/a sexy latin sterotype".
But having to step back to player-level analysis versus in-character analysis when looking at his whole romance arc just feels sloppy. but i'd much rather stick to "bad writing" than "intentional character choice" in terms of how to interpret the scene I guess, at this point, for poor Rook's sake. and i know people disagree with when I've said that before bc as much as I love Mary Kirby in other areas, she has said many times that she doesn't like writing romance, and I think it really does show here. As much as I love Lucanis and the scraps we got I wish I didn't have to do so much filling-in-the-blanks on our own.
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euniexenoblade · 8 months ago
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re: egg discourse
i thought it was just people saying that specifically making jokes about someone being trans but not knowing it yet can be kinda invalidating and sometimes traumatic. are people actually saying you should never tell someone that they might be trans?
i dont really have a side in the debate it just feels like people are willfully misunderstanding eachother and its making my brain hurt
"making jokes about someone being trans but not knowing it yet can be kinda invalidating and sometimes traumatic"
Sure, but it also isn't for a lot of people. And, a lot of people I talk to say egg jokes helped them realize who they were. Though I do think part of this resistance to an egg joke is actually internalized transphobia at points (the idea of being compared to trans people is being treated as degrading in a lot of these people's arguments) the truth of the matter is different people need and want different things. Me making eggs jokes with my friends is not your friend group.
This is why the recurring complaint of our side is it's never egg jokes can make people uncomfortable, 'make sure your friends are cool with them before just doing them,' it's always complaining about trans women forcing cis men to be women or trans women being "transvestigators" or "similar to Christian missionaries." People who are uncomfortable with egg jokes are always projecting their discomfort onto other people, other friend groups, and portray harmless fun between friends as something abusive.
Like for example,
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this is a projection. the egg jokes people are talking about happen among friends and stuff, but this person is doing a whole "never make egg jokes because people did it about me and made me feel bad" (oh woe is you, people thought you might be transgender, how disgusting to be a tranny). The majority of egg jokes are not about random ass people, it's within friend groups. And, if you don't like your friends saying them, tell them to stop. If they don't? Then stop being their friends. Also from that post
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The underwater filter butchered that. I know you can't read it but I wanted to post it cuz fucking look at that. What the hell. Anyways,
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This opposition to egg joke people always talk about strangers. As if we're walking up to random people on the street and making egg jokes about them. It's mostly contained to friend groups. This is just an inaccurate portrayal of what's actually being discussed, and I'm sure the op will be like "I'm talking about my experience!" but OP openly admitted that this rant was relevant to a random blogger complaining about an egg tweet a woman made about her own friend group that neither this OP or that blogger are part of. They are actually dictating how strangers are allowed to act and identify with this, not the egg jokesters.
Yeah, once and a while you get shit like "Aaron Bushnell seems transfem" which was a completely innocuous convo that no one would have seen if well known transmisogynists who accuse random trans women of pedophilia like three times a year hadn't found the post. It was a trans woman seeing herself in someone important in history, and even if someone said something inappropriate, the backlash was undeserved. Yall say embarrassing shit all the time and no one's running you off the web site for it.
I'm sorry this person and others seem to have a bad time with egg jokes (though most of the time, what they describe isn't egg jokes but that's a whole other thing), but their few experiences can not be used to determine a blanket response to something so many people actually do enjoy and find useful. I'm especially not gonna take a cis person's opinions on egg jokes seriously (since so many have seemed to gotten involved and think their opinion on this matters).
"are people actually saying you should never tell someone that they might be trans?"
Yes! That's like, the entire underlying premise of this! Like, 100% this is the backbone of every anti-egg joke argument. That's the entire concept of "egg prime directive." And, it's overwhelmingly weaponized against trying to help transfems realize themselves sooner than they would. From the aforementioned Bushnell drama, to the polls where a shit ton of transmascs voted it was ok to tell an eggy friend they might be a trans man but NOT ok to tell an eggy friend they might be a trans woman, to the newest drama where chongoblog whined about a random trans woman on twitter making egg jokes about her friend (which it was later revealed chongoblog misrepresented the tweet), the anti egg joke committee / "You can't tell anyone they're trans!!!" crew are always wielding this ideology against transfems / trans women but practically never against transmascs.
This is why it's constantly said that these posts and arguments are transmisogynistic in nature. "I'm a trans woman and I say eggs jokes are bad, so it can't be transmisogynistic you're just using that as a shield!" That's great but 1) maybe read between the lines, or read the criticisms you're clearly ignoring and maybe you'll see these people don't respect you 2) the whole "using transmisogyny as a shield" is like, classic transmisogyny at this point. We've been hearing that from anti-feminists, cryptoterfs, and trans woman hating google doc writers for a few years now and 3) you being complicit doesn't mean we gotta care about what you say.
"it just feels like people are willfully misunderstanding eachother and its making my brain hurt"
Oh, I'm sure this is absolutely the case. The problem is a bunch of transphobes are really who spurred a lot of this drama up earlier this year and instead of people thinking "oh these people have bad intentions I shouldn't boost this" they instead were like "Yeah! I don't like egg jokes!" and now we have to deal with trans women making egg jokes (normal, harmless, pro-trans and literally want to help trans people) being compared to transvestigators (a literal anti-trans hate group thing). The issue is people aren't treating us as people, and thus it gets returned in kind.
What's the answer to this? Mutual understanding that "some people need to be told they're trans," "some people don't respond well to being told who they are," "egg jokes can help people and be a fun joke for friends," and "some people are uncomfortable with egg jokes" can all coexist. But, honestly, I don't think we'll ever get there.
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newtonsheffield · 4 months ago
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I know you're super knowledgable about Bridgerton so I wanted to get your thoughts and opinions on this. As someone who hasn't read the books (but Idc about spoilers), I wonder how the show is gonna have Eloise end up with Mr. Crane. From what I know of the books from the wiki fan page and Tumblr the books really seem like a suggestion at this point lol and I just cant conceptualize her ending up with him but I'd love your input or theories.
I hope Eloise is one of the very last seasons. I hate so many of her decisions but I empathize w her and I'm so fucking invested in her growthI and thats gonna take time and I dont want them to rush that for the sake of order
I Don’t know about super knowledgeable 😂
I think… they’re going to have to pull some pretty major changes to that story to get it to work within the context of the show at this point. That’s why for a split second I thought Eloise and Michaela Stirling were getting paired up. And truthfully I think one of the major problems the show has to face is the Marina of it all.
I have said many times and I will stand by it still that Julia Quinn is not the world’s greatest author. But something she is good at is giving you only the information you need to invest in the relationship that she wants you to invest in. In the books we have no idea who Marina is (A distant Bridgerton cousin in the books) until Phillip starts talking about her at the beginning of the book. That means, we find it a little tragic that she suffered from these mental health issues but were distanced from it. That’s very different from the darkness of a character that we know suffering the same fate. It also I feel… won’t really play that well given she was the one who gave Colin a speech about the fact that she was content enough with her life and didn’t need saving. That’s a switch up.
I think… there’s a lot of work to do to get Eloise and Phillip to a place where they’re right for each other.
I have been critical of the line they’ve taken with Eloise because I feel like she fails to recognize the privilege she has that she doesn’t need to marry. Violet might nudge her a bit over enthusiastically in that direction but she really seems to have given up on that after last season. And Anthony, after the disaster of making a match for Daphne and after finding that his life is SO much improved being married to Kate ho he loves very much is NOT going to arrange her a match and force her to go through with it. Few women were afforded this. And Eloise does not recognise that at all. They got SO FUCKING CLOSE to her acknowledging this through her friendship with Cressida this season. And then they threw it back in my fucking face! True feminism is about having the CHOICE.
I feel like Tyra Banks.
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Eloise has a lot to learn and one of my criticisms of season three is that I felt Penelope and Colin weren’t ready for each other and needed to grow more so I hope they take their time with Eloise.
This is just one person’s opinion of course. Has no bearing on anything.
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horrorshow · 4 months ago
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Can you talk about why you think blocking and moving on is a bad thing? I thought it was a way to curate your space and avoid drama
idk maybe i'm too idealistic but fandom is a much more friendlier, welcoming, supportive, creative, engaging, active, diverse and interesting space when it's treated like a community where people are encouraged to participate and talk about their interests and where there's space for niche or more unpopular opinions without these people having to worry about being blocked and feel unwelcome by the majority of the fandom they are in. i can't stand how blocking everyone you disagree with has become the first thing to do.
you say its 'to curate your experience'. but blocking people does not only curate YOUR experience. you're also forcefully curating other users' experiences. and not for the better.
people say 'i will block you for literally anything' and then those same people wonder why engagement is down, why no one sends asks, why no one reblogs, why rarely anyone talks in the tags anymore and why this place feels so dead and boring and quiet. i wonder why!!!!
people treat real people as annoying ads they can dispose of at their whim. but that's not how a fandom or a site like tumblr works. (besides, if you really care about people curating their own experience you wouldn't block people. you can filter and blacklist and never see them again while still granting them the same freedom instead of actively making their experience worse.)
you say its to avoid drama. but seeing a post you dont agree with is not 'drama'. and blocking is not solving anything except for you personally. fandom was more fun when we remembered that every user is a real person you share a space with, and probably some mutuals as well, so you find a way to live with each other. starting with a restraining order seems a bit excessive and is not contributing to anything. it's not that hard to be respectful and tolerate others and acknowledge people have different opinions and interests and still co-exist in peace. its not that hard to be nice to people and try to find common ground with them and interact with the stuff you DO like. you do this in every aspect of your real life, so why not online?
i hear you say: 'but that requires WORK and i don't NEED to do any of that bc i can just block them'.
yeah, you can try to create your own bubble and only hang out with like minded people but you wont EVER fully achieve that (no matter how much you block, social media WILL keep feeding you posts you disagree with bc it makes them money). social media WILL pressure you into an 'us vs. them' mentality where you constantly feel like everything online is a threat or an argument you have to win and where being mean and unnuanced gives you the most notes and where you don't even see, let alone be able to treat, other users as people anymore bc you don't interact with them anymore other than to block or fight them. that's not how i want it to be online. it's not fun to me. and maybe i'm a pessimist but i think it will eventually be the death of online fandom and sites like tumblr. look at the state of twitter right now. DOES blocking give you a better experience in the long run? i doubt that it does. overall, i think it makes people even less tolerable and more vulnerable to hate and fear mongering, and social media an even more hostile place.
it's everything i hate about social media and everything i want to fight against and WILL fight against. i won't pretend my meager contribution will change anything, but i LIKE to just scroll past posts i don't vibe with and not see every argument online as a personal offense. it keeps me curious. most posts aren't that bad when you know the person behind it. i mean, you do you, i'm not gonna say what you should or shouldn't do bc that's up to you, but i recommend it: free yourself of the block button and bring back supportive user communities based on a shared love for the same thing and focus on what you have in common with people, just like you would do in real life. save the block button for the rotten apples who DO keep trying to pick fights and exclude others.
(which is, now that i think about it, probably the main difference: most people see the block button as a neutral way to prevent worse. but. that's only the case on an individual level. and treating everything online as an individual choice to which there are no further consequences, especially if they happen on a larger scale, is already a loss.)
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the-s1lly-corner · 1 year ago
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Oh my God.
I had a very funny and slightly strange idea...
Imagine that there is mutual sympathy between the reader and Jax. In short, Jax has crush on reader, but the reader... don’t know it.(or just don’t see it)
So, a new person appears in the circus. It doesn't matter who it is, what it is, what his name is, etc.
So, the newcomer and the reader became very close friends. I mean, sleeping in the same room, hugging, holding hands...(I mean friends, no lovers)
Look, I just want to see Jax get jealous...?
Well, thank you!!
Jealous!Jax x reader !
Ohohohoh I saw this get sent in a few days ago and I've been meaning to get to this ! I answer requests chronologically most the time and I dont like temporarily skipping requests... but boy was I tempted
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First things first he stomps his foot in agitation when he sees you and this newcomer hanging out. His ears also lower when you decide to hang out with them over him
Immediately jax targets the guy, like. I'm talking entire tunnel vision, hes hardly interested in pranking anyone else
In fact, these new pranks seem a little... mean spirited.. like before they were just annoying but most of the circus crew can tell theres some meanness set behind them
I mean, no ones all too worried since you cant exactly die or get a long lasting injury in the digital world
Jax makes it very clear that he doesnt like this person
With all of that said and done it boils over into you pulling jax to the side and asking what his deal is
And I can see this going one of both ways
Either he let's slip that he has feelings for you, or he doesnt... and both have major consequences; both good and bad
First the good, if he slips he has feelings and you reciprocate, I think you guys would try to talk the entire thing out... hes jealous.. obviously if you guys get together boundaries are going to need to be set... maybe.. everyone can find a balance where no ones jealous or upset..?
If he doesnt, and he holds his ground on why this new guy is dumb and stinky and "hes soooooooo not in your league, seriously" I think this could escalate.... worst case scenario you guys get into a heated argument. Jax isnt being honest and hes now openly putting down this person, and you're trying to come up with a reason for his sudden malice. Even worse case scenario you guys may.. well stop talking to each other
I don't think jax handles jealousy well, in my opinion
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luimagines · 7 months ago
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it didn't answer my question but it was delightful to read nonetheless!!!!!
i meant like.. yk how you mentioned that the chain would doubt human reader more bcs theyre human?? then you said a situation when reader would save sky and sky would be like "nope readers got this fym they dont??" like what situations would happen with the others to make them also be like "nvm readers got this"?
(hopefully this makes sense HELP)
-person who asked about the human reader scenario thing
I've had to think about this for a while so I'm that this took me so long to answer. ^.^*
Twilight: Given that he has no problems with humans, Reader's problem would just winning him over as a person. He finds that he adore them just as much when he first introduces Wolfie to them. They gasped and instantly started complimenting and petting him, much to the horror of everyone else. They couldn't resist giving him kisses and telling what a good boy he was- not recognizing him a wolf. Twilight figures that if Reader likes animals, they're not all that bad.
Sky: His opinion was already mentioned when they got separated from the group and he hurt his ankle, unable to move on. Reader picked him up and carried him on his back until they were able to meet up with the group again. Their stamina and determination impressed him. From there he disregarded the other comments and assumptions about Reader, coming to their aid when they needed him to.
Wind: Being in the middle, Wind didn't really have much of an opinion. Not to mention that his age leaves him more vulnerable to going with the crowd and what the majority says. But there's a moment where his age also leaves him vulnerable as any small boy would. Reader finds him rubbing away the tears when the adventure become too much and lets him cry on their shoulder. They don't make a big deal out of it and help to hide the fact that he broke down from the other heroes. Wind's ego was bruised at being caught, but he's glad that Reader took his pride into account, knowing how much he wanted the other boys to view him as a equal. He'll remember that.
Wild: Reader was willing to eat anything Wild threw their way. they weren't picky and even willing to help make new recipes for Wild to make. They cooked together, sharing stories around the cauldron and laughing about how similar they were, even if they were still so different. Wild doesn't know/remember he's part human, but he knows he's different. Reader was always different so Wild doesn't think they'll see him as anything other than himself- and when they manage to choke down the dubious food he playfully tossed their way. He realized that was an invitation for the biggest prank war of the century. This'll be fun.
Legend: This boy near the end is just petty. At first Reader would meet his sass tit for tat. But after a particularly difficult day, Legend tries to get into the verbal sparring before Reader frustratedly tears up, hands clenched into fists and shaking from the restraint they hold over themselves. They yell at Legend, calling him out on his crap and saying that they're sick of his attitude and they don't understand what they did for him to fight them so much. It occurs to Legend that they were not on the same page after all and the verbal sparring was actually Reader attempting to defend themselves against his barrage of attitude. Reader takes off and Legend gives them time to cool down. He feels bad. He's self conscious enough to realize that he's the one at fault here.
Four: I think he's the simplest to be won over. Obviously, Reader has questions about the weapons he'd make in the forge. Even is Reader doesn't necessarily have the knowledge to meet him toe to toe in blacksmithing, they'd no doubt knowing someone who does. They mention techniques and Four was able to go on and on about his love and his passion with someone who actually listened. It doesn't seem like much to Reader but that sort of connection rewired something in Four's brain. Four may have grown up surrounded by bias but he's the fastest to simplify that Reader, at least, isn't defined but what others have told him.
Warrior: Is always watching them like a hawk. If they're up to something he's going to be the first to know. Because of this long time observation sting operation thing he sees all the little things that Reader does when they think no one is looking. Little by little his bias and hate his chipped away and before he knows it, when Reader is threatened, he's sprinting to come to their aid- worry gnawing at his bones on the off chance he doesn't get there in time. It's only after Reader is tended to and no long in any danger that he realizes the implications of his actions. He wants to hold on to what he thought he knew... but he finds that the more he thinks about it, the more he realizes that Reader had already proven a lot of the rumors wrong. He owes them an apology.
Hyrule: As one the least trusting of the group, he would have spent a lot of time avoiding Reader just on principle. But then he gets a bad hit. Sliced right across his abdomen. He's bleeding out. There's a lot of blood loss. He's worried about the curse. The monsters. Hyrule. Reader is suddenly above him, pinning him down, refusing the very concept of him losing more blood. They're covered in the crimson liquid quickly. Despite not able to feel or use magic, they patch him up. They stich him together again. Through sheer force of will they refuse to let him die. They don't take advantage of his weakness. They don't use his blood for anything he would have thought they would. He passes out with his life in their hands and a debt to pay.
Time: Is skeptical of new people as a rule. But he never really believed the rumors of humans anyway. He just never had a personal experience with them and he knew better after everything he's gone through to make that call without have first hand information. There was a moment where they were about to check in to an inn but Reader was denied access. To avoid a fight, they stayed with Epona in the stables for the night. Time was furious with the concept. The next day, after herding them away from the others he asks why they didn't fight back. Why didn't they stand up for themselves? Reader explains that's just how it is between Hylians and humans. They don't expect anything glamorous when dealing with them. They say that being the bigger person comes at a price but they're not willing to sacrifice their head for the sake of someone who doesn't know them and will never see them again. Time isn't happy with this answer. It's not right. And isn't it a hero's job to fix what's wrong?
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ganondoodle · 7 months ago
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this isnt a call out for anyone; i keep getting asked why i even post my opinions on the internet if i dont want to argue whenever i mention how tired i am of people trying to argue with me or proof me wrong
and i just ... for one its bc there are people that have told me they like hearing my opinions bc it makes them feel less alone, its validating to hear that i am not alone and i make them feel less alone (this is a big reason)
then theres the thing .. do you feel good never saying your opinion on anything and just keeping everything to yourself? be it big or small, i tried to do that for years, just trying to crawl deeper and deeper into a hole bc clearly i am the problem and should be able to deal with everything on my own, never say anything, i could be annoying, i could be a burden, and it nearly killed me; i have very few friends and i already spam them enough to feel constantly guilty
and if i did that on some private account ... what use is that, thats the same thing as not saying anything, whats the use of saying anything when no one listens, even to select few, whats the point if others cant find it, there might be people i dont know at all that would find solace in hearing my stupid ramblings about games
its true i lack self control and just tend to talk about stuff when i feel the need of talking, but is that really so bad?
correct me if im wrong but i was never of the impression that posting something on the internet automatically means wanting to debate and argue unless you specifically say or initiate it on someone elses post? like thats why i pretty much always make my own post to complain and dont go on other peoples posts of opposing views, id view the latter as an invitation to argue moreso than the former
when i post some stupid opinion (im talking about harmless personal video game opinions mind you) on my own account who am i bothering, if people agree thats great! if they dont they can just move on- i know people love to discuss and share different opinions but the the ones i most often encounter are ones where its a basically trying to start a fight over whos more right (like theres always one correct opinion to have) or just telling me i am not allowed to feel like i feel-
im aware i cant expect everyone to be able to see a differeing opinion and move on without saying anything, but when i say something, unless its specifically a question, i just do it to vent, to let my thoughts out so they dont slowly gnaw at me, maybe find validation in others also thinking like that (i know i cant also expect everyone to think that way .. i just see it as a form of politeness? sorta?); in all honesty, i dont do it to get told opposing opinions (i know thats maybe a little ... idk, selfish i guess?) bc i usually have seen or heard those already and am saying mine bc i havent seen it before or very very little- what i think is often very much not the majority so the need to say something gets greater the more i see somethign i dont agree with, like an urge to balance it? a call to see if i am alone or not? and much less so to argue or debate over something like that, im tired and exhausted at all times, and have often trouble even getting myself to draw, i dont enjoy fights of any kind, and especialyl so when its about something so completely ignorable like a game opinion i only said bc i wanted it out of my head and bc i have seen that the majority seems to be of a different one
like a sticky note on a wall, not an invitation to a political meeting?
maybe this is something i need to work on and get better at, i havent found a way that lets me get rid of my thoughts in a way that doesnt leave me feeling guilty (like spamming my friends) or to gnaw at me (not saying anything, or somewhere no ones gonna hear it)
i know im incapable of shutting up ever (though at least i got a better control over my emotions by now) and i risk accidentally seeming like im inviting people to a fight but i dont know what else to do
maybe its something i horribly missunderstood about the internet, but its my only outlet for that, i dont have anyone IRL to talk to about my interests, maybe its a flaw that needs work, maybe its just a flaw, i dont know :/
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puffskeeter · 4 months ago
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Hey I’m such a big fan of your art and I very much enjoy watching your YouTube channel 🤍🤍
And I want to ask you why you don’t ship the ppgxrrb and I want to hear your opinion about it which I can very much respect.
Plus another question that what type of fashion you think your au of the Powerpuff, Rowdyruff, and your Original Characters fall into between I really love how you draw them?
OMG TYSM!! I think i've seen your comments on my videos and TYSM for those too!! :D
I'll make a seperate post for my fashions/aesthetics for RRBORN characters! this one is pretty long even though i wanted it to be short lolz
Why i dont actively ship PPGxRRB:
I'm scrapping my drafted essay post about this for now because its really uncalled for and unnecessary. IDK sorry to anyone who looked forwards 2 it, but i just dont think i illustrate my point very well and more than half of it is lowkey a biased vent post and pure rambling. Either way this is the TLDR for the post you'll never see LOL.
But actually, I do ship PPGxRRB, i've just drifted away from it over the years. I think one of the biggest 'problems' i have with PPG x RRB is mainly with the portrayal of it. My main issue is with how a lot of people mischaracterize the RRB/PPG and completely deconstruct them as characters so that they can be love interests for the eachother and nothing more. One of my points in my scrapped post was that; I have no idea how an entire fandom managed to gender-bend the Bechdel test, but it is rare that i find PPGxRRB media where the RRB have actual lives, interests, hobbies, and friends that have nothing to do with the PPG. Half the time they can barely have a thought if it isn't about the PPG. As i said, Gender-bent Bechdel test.
Another point was that: ppgxrrb has gained a horrible reputation for itself over the years. Back in its "Glory" days, Toxic fans of the ships had bulldozed anything that differs from their favorite empty dynamics. Those usually being The Reds, Blues, and Greens. Nowadays i still see almost nothing in the realms of variety between creators interpretations of the ships. Almost every time i see a PPGxRRB post, it can fit into a set dynamic that the ship is already infamous for.
I want to be able to see the creators love and passion for their ships. I want to know how and why these characters ended up together. If a story is to be told, i want to hear it. I know that the majority of PPGxRRB creators are, by default, amateurs (they dont get paid and its not on a professional scale), but after seeing the exact same badly written love story hundreds , maybe even thousands of times with little-to-no variety, I've gotten bored and tired of people devaluing my favorite characters to be nothing more than overplayed dynamics and shipping fuel.
A lot of people like shipping because of the dynamics, but ship dynamics don't hook me in, and ive noticed that most PPGxRRB stuff is purely ship dynamics and nothing more. Theres nothing wrong with loving ship dynamics or being drawn to ships for their specific dynamics! I just dont care about dynamics, i care about chemistry and story. But most amateurs cant effectively show the chemistry or write the story, a lot of them can barely characterize the 2 characters in their ships.
FYI this isnt about anyone specific or even many recent fans of PPGxRRB. I've been in/around the online PPG fandom since before 2016, and a lot of my thoughts/feelings on the matter have a lot to do with stuff that happened over the years i've loved this series, and more specifically, The RowdyRuff Boys.
To be clear: When i say that they are mischaracterized, i'm not talking about HC's. I'm just tired of seeing the PPG and RRB dulled down into one-note personalities with stereotypical characterization and almost always no tangible character development. A love story is still a story, and a lot of shippers seem to half ass the "story" for favor of the "love".
I dont hate or even dislike PPG x RRB. I'm just really tired of rarely seeing people do the RRB justice, and i want these characters to be treated with the full respect that i think they deserve.
WOW this post is way to long already... still a lot shorter than my OG post. Sorry for being insane about the RRB. it will happen again.
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