#but i don't need that personally. i'd rather talk about my hyperfixations to someone who actually wants to hear it

[theflyingfeeling]

...💌

[whispers-of-lilith]

Lilith, who're your top 8 One Piece loves?

Star! Hi & thank you for popping in 🥺 Honestly, I had to think about this for a hot minute bc my brain has been hard focused on JJK lol.

Buckle up, bc this is going to be a long ass ride.

Liliths Top 8 One Piece Loves

Silvers "Dark King" Rayleigh

While I do love young Rayleigh when he was in his "prime", I will always choose older Rayleigh. It's no secret that this man definitely slept around at some point in his life. Not only does he have experience, but he knows exactly how to utilize all the skills he's learned over the years.

Rayleigh has stamina for days [ie. when his ship sank & he casually swam to Amazon Lily], he knows how to please, how to edge, etc. He could fuck me for days, to where I couldn't walk, but he wouldn't even have broken a sweat.

He seems like a fun person to be around & honestly I could see myself spending nights sitting in his lap while he drinks & tells stories of all the crazy shit he's done.

Dracule Mihawk

Ah, the dark, broody man who lives alone on an island. Literally my ideal type, bc dealing with people is hard & I'd rather spend my days on a rainy island in a massive castle.

I've probably said this one too many times, but whenever it rains I always have the urge to get railed by Mihawk next to the fireplace in his library. You just know he has a plush rug in front of it & if you bother him enough while he's reading? Best be prepared because he's going to teach you a lesson & you sure as shit can't finish until he finishes the chapter he's reading.

We could just enjoy the quiet together, I'm okay with spending time with someone even if we're doing our own thing.

Shanks

Shanks is like the golden retriever to my black cat. He doesn't take life too seriously [unless the situation calls for it & fuck if he isn't sexy when he's serious]. He knows how to have fun & would probably have the easiest time relaxing me simply by just cuddling with me.

Another man who clearly sleeps around, but knows exactly what he's got & how to please. I'm easily embarrassed & Shanks loves to embarrass, it's just in his nature.

I will always be a blushing, stuttering mess when it comes to this man's charms & I wouldn't have it any other way.

Benn "Big Dick" Beckman

You can't really have Shanks without Benn, or Benn without Shanks for that matter. Where Shanks throws caution to the wind, Benn is there to keep his ass in line.

He's gruff, stoic at times, doesn't seem to talk much, but will go feral when it comes to protecting something or someone he loves. Also, if you couldn't tell by the title I gave him, I just know this man is HUGE.

I'd melt if he called me "princess", "kitten", "pet" or anything along those lines and it's always a bonus when he follows it with a smirk. I'm down for a good railing sesh whenever he gets frustrated with Shanks [which is often].

[I just need to be eifle towered by Shanks & Benn, it'd probably solve 90% of my problems]

Charlotte Katakuri

Clearly I like the quiet / strong type if this list is any indication. Let's get the obvious out of the way first, Katakuri can & will split me in half with that dick & if that's how I go– then so be it.

I love a man with tattoos & have you seen his body?? Absolute perfection. Don't mess with the people he loves unless you have a death wish, he can & will obliterate you on sight if you do.

When he's not going feral in battle, his quiet & calculating personality is precious. He seems like the type to be easily flustered & I'd love to push him a bit so I could see his little blush. Idk he's just precious & adorable & needs to be protected at all costs.

[Ps. Would climb him like a koala]

Trafalgar Law

I loved him before I even met him in the anime. Fell for the scrungly, tired, lanky man seated on a box in Saboady. I even went as far as to cosplay a fem!Law for one of my first cons.

Again, another broody, quiet, tired man to add to my list. We're literally one in the same, we hyperfixate on things & neither of us sleep. So I know he'll always be awake at 3am to listen to me ramble about all the stupid facts I know.

Also, tbh, the tattoos do something for me. I mean, watching as his death tattoos disappear inside with each stroke? Fuck. Jsjdjajsbbxjsj. He is another one that flusters easy, but if you push him too far he 100% lets his dom side out.

Sir Crocodile

Sir Crocodile, hng. Money laundering? My man would never [yes he would & we live well bc of it, so no I'm not snitching]. I could sit in his lap like a perfect little kitten, whether he's sitting in on meetings or just enjoying a cigar, just lemme me on the big mans lap.

Lo said it best earlier, the rings. THE RINGS AND MAKING YOU CLEAN THEM JAHDUSJHAJAI. To be dominated by him would be a dream, he's so smug & cocky & ugh.

I would be his little princess, my self respect would go out the window. He 100% showers you with gifts just bc he can & he loves when you wear things he's bought you.

King [Alber]

Oh, what do you know, another quiet, strong, stoic man... see a theme here? Another man who would split me in half & I'd say thank you for doing so.

Just. His hair. His wings. His face tattoo. Everything about him was perfectly sculpted from the heavens & simply looking at him makes my day better.

On days when it's cold he could wrap us both in his wings & I'd fucking melt into a puddle. He's the type of man to be cold towards others, except for the person he loves & I'm all here for it.

[earthtokhal]

RE: EMOTIONAL DR POST.

Formula 1 wasn't a foreign sport to me, my uncle and cousins all loved it for as long as I can remember but my father was more of a bat and ball sports guy, so instead of watching the likes of Ricciardo, Hamilton, Vettel and Rosberg, my days were filled with the Pollocks, the De Villiers and the Warners.

But I found Daniel Ricciardo one evening in 2022 as I was scrolling through Netflix. I found DTS and decided to give it a try to finally pay back my cousin for taking interest in something else I liked. She did it for me, I'd do this for her but more so, I needed a distraction.

You see, my favorite band, BTS had just put a hold on their career. My favorite member, Seokjin was going to be enlisting in the South Korean army in a few months and soon after the rest of them would follow. It was something that we knew was coming but something no one could truly prepare for.

But being the ever anxious soul who would rather change the course of things rather than let it happen and experience it then, I knew that it would be something that would hit me hard. Seokjin would be gone for two years.

And it was odd, and slightly embarrassing because I was a then 27 year old with a big girl job and family responsibilities absolutely losing my mind about my comfort person being gone for 2 years. Incredibly parasocial, I know. But the year had been hard, I had covid, I lost my father, my best friend was still all the way in South Korea and I had new responsibilities that I was still coming to terms with.

I had met my best friend through BTS and we had spent many hours talking about them, writing fiction and now we didn't know how to navigate this. Well, I didn't. She's much stronger than I am.

My intention was solely to have a distraction, and to maybe get some information to talk to my cousin about the sport she had loved since she was a kid but the second that guy, with the curly hair and big grin sat in the interview chair and opened his mouth, I was hooked.

"I'm Daniel Ricciardo and I'm a car mechanic."

I was so incredibly taken by him that I somehow went from season 1 to season 3 in just a few days and got my best friend hooked too.

I had found my new hyperfixation, someone so incredibly like Seokjin. It's weird that I say that because I don't know either of them personally but Daniel was incedibly "welcoming."

Unfortunately for me, by the time I did find the series and ultimately the sport, his exit from Mclaren was already announced and so I watched the remainder of the season with that in mind, I just found him but I am about to lose him. In those few races, I watched in 2022, I had the full experience of being a Danny Ric fan, the happiness when he qualified well, the joy when he was able to get a good strategy and absolute elation when he got solid points but I also experienced the lows, the change of the steering wheel, COTA 2022 and then the goodbye but somehow it didn't feel like this.

I was genuinely upset that he didn't want to go to Haas. For my own gain, I wanted him to join a team immediately so that I could have him just a little while longer but he didn't. I remember getting so incredibly angry with that F1 presenter who saying that he should have taken the seat despite him just telling them that he needed a break mentally.

And after the most grueling year of my life, this millionaire, Aussie sportsman showed me that it's okay to take a break even when nobody else thinks you should.

He left the sport that day with rumours surrounding him that he would join Mercedes and Red Bull as their third driver. I was so happy that he spent his last race fighting with the man he spent some of his first years in formula 1 fighting alongside, Seb. Daniel eventually got that point and I thought, Seb is for sure leaving so he deserves this goodbye, Daniel isn't completely going. He'll get his some other time. (lol)

A few days later, we found out he joined Red Bull and silly me, despite their history of cruel sacking, I thought it would be different here. He will be treated well, this is his team.

Daniel fought, I do not care about the revision people did of his career and those who claimed he didn't show his worth in his time with AT/RB. He fought!

He was out of the car for 8 months and put in a lap time that would have put him next to Max. He came back and matched Yuki immediately, he got absolutely shafted by Zhou and brought the car back to p13.

And in Spa, he pushed the car so hard that he ended up with a lap time deleted but for me, it felt good. He felt comfortable enough to absolutely send it.

Then the rollercoaster of Zandvoort. I was so incredibly scared that we would lose him again and somehow he pulled through, he came back and gave that useless team a p4 in quali and their highest finishing position. No dnf's infront of him, that was all him.

This year, I hoped it would go better for him but he was on the back foot from day 1. Whether the chassis was ready broken or not, we will never know but what I do know is that the second they changed it, he started performing better. Points tell a different story but he has very much been the better driver since at least Canada.

He tested the set ups for them, he gave them the feedback. Hell, he brought them the sponsors.

In the end, he did every single thing he needed to. He was told to perform and boy, did he perform. The seat was never going to be his because he was never going to buy it.

And if this is truly the end, then I hope he decided. I hope that he saw the team for what it truly is and he walked out.

I wish he got a better goodbye, I wish he was able to stay until the end and more importantly, I wish he could have announced it himself. I wish Red Bull actually stood by him like they said would, I wish he never was caught in between this inner political war happening in Red Bull. I wish the media just left him alone and I wish that after Mclaren, that his management team had protected him better.

But, I also hope that this return to the sport was what he hoped it would be, I hope he knows that his talent and career is not defined by his Mclaren stint or by what people try to make it out to be. His competitors from the seven time world champion right down to those who drove alongside him for a few races, hold him in such high regard because he is and will always be THAT guy.

I hope even after all this, he could return whether with Audi or if they ever decide to get that guy out of the RBR seat and I hope then, he gets the goodbye he truly deserves.

But Daniel Ricciardo, you have been a light to so many people. You are the reason the sport has become so big and so commercialized, the reason teams are able to get these insane sponsors now.

Thank you for the journey and for affording me the chance to watch you race post Mclaren.

To me, You are Formula 1 and you will always be.

"May your trials always end in full bloom. "- August D- So far away.

[existsdeath]

Things nobody will tell you about ocd + a mini guide for those who recently got a diagnosis

-𝓢incerly , someone who is disabled due to it .

1. It's gonna be really fucking hard,and that's okay. it's okay to cry after your diagnosis. I'd be more worried if you didn't cry than if you did. Unfortunately for me,I didn't get the opportunity to fully process the depth of my diagnosis at 12,and I personally believe I deserved significantly more than what I got.

2. ocd has NOTHING to do with being clean,organized,or hygienic. ocd is based off of an obsession and then a compulsion,hense the name obsessive compulsive disorder. The reason this stereotype is so often enforced is because contamination ocd is one of the most common forms of ocd,which can come across as just "being clean" rather than a symptom of a deeply complex disorder

3. What are obsessions and compulsions? what's the difference between a neurotypical obsession and a disordered one?

obsessions in ocd are a type of intrusive thought that makes you feel the need to engage in a compulsion in order to relieve this feeling. Neurotypical peoples obsessions do not require compulsions to be done,and are usually not intrusive.

4. ocd is not just obsessions and compulsions, here are some symptoms directly linked to ocd that I personally struggle with :

intrusive thoughts unrelated to compulsions

delusions

panic attacks

paranoia

fatigue

hyperfixations

emotional contamination

hoarding

5. if you're not ready to take medication,DO NOT. My doctor didn't explain the side effects of the meds I would be taking, so I took them without even thinking. This ended in severe fatigue,depression,and an entire year of school missed, which I'm still trying to catch up with. If your psychiatrist encourages you to take medication,ask about the side effects,and make sure they know what they're doing.

6. Adding on to the last point, please get a psychiatrist if you can,and only accept medication from your doctor if it's your only choice. Don't go based off what people say about medication online too much,since it's vastly different for everyone. For me,sertraline was horrible,and for others,it saved their life.

7. ocd is a neurodivergence. it will deeply affect your life in the beginning,and that's okay,you'll get through it. I know it's hard,but I promise it'll get better.

8. ocd does NOT go away. ocd changes the way your brain thinks,you physically cannot recover from it in the same way you can't "recover" from things like autism or adhd. This doesn't mean you'll suffer forever,it just means you'll always have symptoms. Some of these symptoms aren't bad either,maybe by the time your 30 the only evidence of your ocd is mild hoarding & hyperfixations.

9. people without ocd do not understand ocd,especially if they're neurotypical.this goes for most people, excluding psychiatrists & and doctors, to some extent. Yes they will understand it,but they won't ever feel the pain you feel. I guess this goes with most disorders,but I always expected someone to understand my disorder,and they never did,so I think it's good you get that warning.

10. There is so much stigma,stereotypes,and lack of research on ocd. This adds to the last part about how people without ocd truly will not feel the pain you feel, and some will not even understand it.

coping !

so,you just heard all this yapping about ocd,you're probably wondering how to cope,other than getting professional help,these are some things that really helped me.

1. Getting the right therapist , doctor & psychiatrist. Pretty self-explanatory,get someone who truly takes you seriously;someone you have faith in.

2. Medication. Medication is such a huge part of coping,at least for me. I know I'd be dead without it,it truly is an amazing thing.

3. Find support groups. Find other people with ocd,usually through support groups! If you're nervous about talking irl there's tons of online ocd communities you can join on Twitter,discord,reddit,and I'm sure more.

4. Go out of your way to find representation of your disorder. This can mean finding artists with the disorder,or really just anyone you look up to. I find it very inspiring to see how much someone with the same disorder as me accomplished,while also being able to relate to their media. Some of my favorite artists who discuss ocd are Alec Benjamin and NF. You can even find certain games that talk about ocd,personally I find milk inside a bag of milk is perfect. it's difficult to explain the plot since it's very much up to interpretation,but it's the only thing that's made me feel so represented.

there's also a sequel , milk outside a bag of milk which is really beautiful , although deals with some pretty heavy topics. ( can you tell I'm hyperfixated on this game ? / s )

5. Deal with your compulsions constantly. I know it's hard,I know you're tired,but something my therapist told me that always stuck with me is that "whether or not you do your compulsions,you're going to be stressed ,so why not fight back against them so in the future you'll be at peace?"

6. do NOT give into your compulsions. ( easier said than done, I know ) you'll feel relief temporarily,and then you'll need to do it again,again,and again,and again...again...again...again... and again.

7. lean on people ( family & friends ),and take time for your mental health. Your mental health is so important,especially with disorders like these. If you think you need a break to focus on recovery,do that. Don't keep pushing yourself until you break,give yourself support first. For me,I haven't been in school since the beginning of the year ( not by choice ) and I actually don't know what I'd do if I had to go to school,I really don't know.

8. get accommodations when possible. This is a disorder,so as long as you have proof of your diagnosis you should be able to get accommodations. I know for me,I'm allowed to do school completely online,but obviously it'll depend on the severity of your ocd aswell as what your psychiatrist & therapist think.

9. I highly recommend involving your therapist & psychiatrist in school,it has helped me so much. Give them your principles contact info if possible,and let them discuss how they can help you together.

And as always,if you're feeling suicidal please call 988. It gets better and you're stronger than you think. I'm proud of you for going this long.

feel free to ask questions if you're curious!

[lost-technology]

Tristamp and Year in Review

I saw someone else speaking of their discovery of Trigun: Stampede and how it helped them through the year and only glossed over it. However, this anime was important to me this year. Trigger warnings: Death, grief, mourning, suicidal ideation and the fact that this was a generally shitty year. Personal stuff. Heartwarming "warning": Healing, reconciliation and a touch of nostalgia.

Where I was when I started the year: Laughing at Congress' inability to elect a House speaker (I follow American politics), working a shitty fast food job and looking forward, with some trepidation, to the Trigun reboot that my partner's adult nephew (also best friend) told me about, being an old school Trigun fan who had Trigun as almost her whole life back in the 2000s. I have a bookshelf full of manga, some even in Japanese even though I'm an English-only reader. I have a manga-book signed by Nightow, this is my level of dedication, even though I had fallen out of the fandom for a long time (my hyperfixations turning toward certain videogames - Zelda most prominently and my getting hard into She-Ra and the Princesses of Power for some reason. Spop was an obsession because I was a fan of the original when I was a kid (yes, Virginia, old people are in fandom). I got into the new series, mostly because I really loved Entrapta (mad scientist trope!) and was into a certain side of the fandom I now largely regret being in. I wound up having a falling out with a lot of people because a misunderstanding that lead to an accusation of plagiarism that culminated in me displaying actual symptoms of the mental illness that my "friend group" lied and said they were compassionate towards,* me being fairly harassing toward certain people and picking fights, (certain paranoid false accusations had me PISSED), people treating me like an emotional predator who was somehow "out to get them" instead of suffering a spiral. Someone screenshotting and putting up some suicidal ideation I'd posted on my blog that I'd deleted specifically in order to tell people in the fandom who weren't even in the drama that I was "faking it" and to not talk to me / exile me from the fandom. And that drove me over the edge - that thing. When I got back from the hospital, I was determined to remain in the fandom - making a new blog, doing my art and fics whether the gatekeepers wanted me in their precious fandom or not. (*Something I have learned in my long life is that no one is truly compassionate to the bipolar - not even other bipolar people. When we're a mess, we're a mess. Trust me, not even paid psychs are always prepared). This happened like, 2 years ago, but I'm still bitter. So, that's where I was, plugging away, embittered in an old fandom that I wasn't quite quitting because I needed to show myself, if no one else, that I was still standing. Looking forward to Trigun reboot and worried it would suck. Looking very forward to the new Zelda game, wondering if I could afford it when it came out. Watched the first Trigun: Stampede with my fiance / partner. He declared "It ain't Trigun" because he didn't like the new art style and some of it really had a different feel than the '98 anime. I was all "I don't really like how the SEEDS stuff is just right out front there rather than an unfolding mystery, but this animation is SLICK and I want to see where this is going!" 1/2

[thewitchesfortune]

So someone posted a short rant earlier that kind of pissed me off, but rather than going on their post and starting a fight, I'd like to make my own rant about it. I also wound up blocking that person, because they've been posting things I disagree with far more than anything, and I disagree inherently with the ideology behind the post they made.

They essentially said that routine and discipline in the craft are not at all important, and neither is getting results. They said that anyone who believes any of it IS important had a "toxic grindset/workout mentality", which is rather ridiculous to be honest. Basically they were comparing occultists who are dedicated as the gymrats of the occult world.

First, routine is important. I'm not great at building routines myself, but if you have a routine set up for monthly and weekly spells it will help you keep on top of things. And to address some of the comments on that post that I know I'll get, I am also neurodivergent. I am undiagnosed, suspected adhd. Routines are extremely difficult for me to start, especially if they are spaced out. Once I am IN a routine though, it's so much easier to keep up with

Discipline is not "toxic" btw. I saw a lot of people talking about needing to have a life outside of the occult, and no one with a brain is gonna tell you that you don't need/get to have one. Discipline is not "I will eat/sleep/breathe this thing until it has comsumed my every waking moment" it is "Practicing this thing at least for an hour a day, or a few times a week will help me get better at it."

Practicing divination daily will help you improve your predictions, just like practicing the guitar every day will help you improve your finger technique. Discipline is required in any craft if you want to become proficient, whether you want to become a "master" or not. It's ok to dabble, but I'm not gonna go to someone who dabbles in painting for a portrait I actually want to show off.

And then the bit about not needing to push yourself to get better results. Like ... I don't understand why anyone would type that. At all. If you don't want results, why are you doing magic? Do you really not care about results, or are you just not getting them? And instead of actively trying to figure out where you're going wrong and improving your craft, you're just gonna talk down anyone who puts in the work to do better? Are you seriously negging people who enjoy practicing magic because you can't be bothered to? That whole post just made that person seem so sad, and then I saw all these other people in the comments agreeing

I'd like to make it clear, this is not putting down spoonies or chronically ill people. Of course, work within your own abilities. Someone with severe asthma shouldn't be trying to mountain climb without a good amount of training. But you CAN START TRAINING. You can work on your craft little bits at a time. You can do low energy magic and rework spells that include things you're allergic to. You can do research, or listen to podcasts in your downtime. Dedication to the craft might look different for different people. It doesn't mean you have to hyperfixate on it and let it consume your life. But you can't expect progress if you AREN'T PROGRESSING

[thebrightmillenial]

✈︎ 𝘄 𝗲 𝗹 𝗰 𝗼 𝗺 𝗲 𝘁 𝗼 𝗺 𝘆 𝗯 𝗹 𝗼 𝗴

Filipa/Filip/River Idc — I hyperfixate for months so don't be surprised if you see me here in six months.

Scorpio moon and pretty insane I guess — soap in a dishwasher.

Grammar and spelling freak — you won't ever catch me using 'u' or 'ur' while talking to someone. I'd rather bite my hand off.

Neurodivergent and a ball of anxiousness — might as well just be honest

I listen to music too much and my style is too peculiar — music is my escape to everything.

Hyperfixated on Supernatural and Sam winchester

spn fan who just wants to escape the real world.

You won't ever catch me in the destiel or wincest world tbh

Bronze is my favorite color for no reason but we don't talk about that.

Need to think first before acting to be fair.

Certified dumbass.

No terfs, homophobes, racists or anti-semitic people please. None of you are welcome here. Also no incest in my blogs – please and thank you.

I don't know what else to say so. Yeah. Bye.

F r I e N d B l O c K

No specific order

@firelitsparks (who has made my header)

@neurodivenport (who has made the color combination)

@featheredstorms (another person I am matching with)

@bucky-babygirl (another person I am matching with)

@davenweenie (another person I am matching with)

@rememberingnoah (my infodump buddy + matching)

@arcturion-the-joke (my cool moot)

@thefailingthief (the one with the braincell)

@thelittleangryitalian (the one who shares half of my braincell)

@mrshamada-dorian (the legend with great taste)

@itz-darktrax (gogo re-encarnation)

I may have missed some but it's all I can think at the top of my head. My dms are always open for new people to chat to!

[just-some-random-blogger]

meow meow, angel!! hope you're not annoyed by this greeting, bc it lets you immediately know who's your anon and i like it. so i've just finished watching hotd. the show in general and the characters seemed indeed more charming before i've watched it. i'm not disappointed but ig it's not what i expected it to be. still good, beautiful and all. don't get me wrong, i knew exactly what i'd been going to see. i knew all the plot points and all this shit. maybe this very fact spoiled everything. and i've never read the book. maybe they differ greatly but i'm talking only about the show. first of all, the plot seemed rather plain to me?.. it's linear and so predictable, too logical and obvious. i know they've cut some (dk how many) scenes but ig it's not the point? maybe it's the problem of the original, maybe the problem is the will to say to much. maybe it's just me being bitchy. second of all, characters?? the whole internet is arguing about daemon having no or grey moral while being blind on the others? wtf?? name me the one (out of the main characters) who's done NOTHING wrong and is absolutely saint?? who brings the love and the thruth only? viserys? a childish and selfish old man who's done so many wrong things and didn't want to face the consequences. rhaenyra? the young one annoyed me but the old one made me angry at times. the second one who's childish and selfish with no sense of duty. alicent? a naive woman whose resentment overgrown herself and made her blind with the desire of revenge. daemon? another selfish and arrogant man. besides, even if he had a sympathy for non-heir rhaenyra, i, personally, saw no love between them in the driftmark. a strong bond? desire? ambitions? targaryen's pride? yes. but not love. don't get me wrong, i understand all the motives, all the backgrounds, the characters. they all need a therapy and are deeply mentally wounded. but in general they're still a bunch of twats who do stupid and selfish things trying to overplay the faith just to be it's only favourite. a bunch of stupid just people doing stupid things. every moment of this show i was like "what if". what if rhaenys had become the queen? what if aemma hadn't died? what if daemon had someone of his liking for a first wife? the amount of their stupid decisions that are just leading them to the tomb... this hyperfixation made me realise i have that pride? strong feeling to the ancestry? that corlys possessed (as he said but we know). i feel SO sorry about this all. it's really scary how such a strong house, a great cultural inheritance is ruined by a bunch of morons. personally, i see it as an enormous tragedy. i can't empathise with mere people beside to the great history. but i did. i cried more times than one. still the mark of a good work. it made me empathise with the people that are TT annoying TT i was crying like a bitch over both scenes when daemon put the crown on his brother's/rhaenyra's head. i felt so sorry about all these relationships of the brothers. i cried over aegon's whole story. he's a twat. but boys with glossy eyes... the way young aemond said 'do not mourn me, mother'??? boy wtf?? i wanted to say who's my fav but tumblr is mad at me for sending long asks. a reason to send a love letter. and! *imagine the furious emoji* yesterday i was literally watching it till 8 am to finish it in time and to not pay for the full subscription bc hotd is literally the one show i've watched in a year but?? they just took the money earlier?? i'm furious but i'm gonna cry if they don't answer my messages TT take care! kiss you good morning or good night or good day! luv u<з

meow meow baby

i have no idea what this is but its cat related and also i want to eat it i hope its not slime. you know what time it is 😎😎

hope you're not annoyed by this greeting, bc it lets you immediately know who's your anon and i like it.

im not annoyed but this greeting. you can greet me however you want

so i've just finished watching hotd. the show in general and the characters seemed indeed more charming before i've watched it.

💀💀💀💀 HAHAHAHAHA BUT NO SO TRUE because now your disillusioned by them this is why the book is always better than the adaptation because there is always space in your head to tweak the character to your liking lol

i'm not disappointed but ig it's not what i expected it to be. still good, beautiful and all. don't get me wrong, i knew exactly what i'd been going to see. i knew all the plot points and all this shit. maybe this very fact spoiled everything.

nah i dont think its the spoilers. but since idk what it is lets agree its the spoilers AHAHAH

and i've never read the book. maybe they differ greatly but i'm talking only about the show.

i never read it too but apparently they changed a lot ?? or rather took a lot of artistic liberties ?? idk dont quote me on that. but knowing how adaptations are im willing to bet they did change a lot

first of all, the plot seemed rather plain to me?.. it's linear and so predictable, too logical and obvious. i know they've cut some (dk how many) scenes but ig it's not the point? maybe it's the problem of the original, maybe the problem is the will to say to much. maybe it's just me being bitchy.

HAHAHAHAHAHAH nah but its i think pretty common for a series to start off strong then dwindle along the way. isn't that what happened to GoT? i never watched it but my mom did and she said 👎 lol HAHAHH its hard to sustain good plotlines if youre not sure what ur doing lol (not that i can say i know what IM doing when i write either AHHHAHAHA). also i dont think its you being bitchy. not liking something or disagreeing with something does not equate to being a bitch. ???? its giving internalized misogyny? its ok you can have against the grain opinions

second of all, characters?? the whole internet is arguing about daemon having no or grey moral while being blind on the others? wtf?? name me the one (out of the main characters) who's done NOTHING wrong and is absolutely saint?? who brings the love and the thruth only? viserys? a childish and selfish old man who's done so many wrong things and didn't want to face the consequences. rhaenyra? the young one annoyed me but the old one made me angry at times. the second one who's childish and selfish with no sense of duty. alicent? a naive woman whose resentment overgrown herself and made her blind with the desire of revenge. daemon? another selfish and arrogant man. besides, even if he had a sympathy for non-heir rhaenyra, i, personally, saw no love between them in the driftmark. a strong bond? desire? ambitions? targaryen's pride? yes. but not love. don't get me wrong, i understand all the motives, all the backgrounds, the characters. they all need a therapy and are deeply mentally wounded. but in general they're still a bunch of twats who do stupid and selfish things trying to overplay the faith just to be it's only favourite. a bunch of stupid just people doing stupid things.

this this entire thing. i agree. they're all damaged and have their own wants and motives and most of all theyre all human. aint nobody perfect and even the best of us get swayed. i think its important to deconstruct works of fiction as they are a mirror to reality, but the moment someone tries to argue with me over an opinion i have over fiction im gonna say 'nah ur right bye' cos that aint worth it

every moment of this show i was like "what if". what if rhaenys had become the queen? what if aemma hadn't died? what if daemon had someone of his liking for a first wife? the amount of their stupid decisions that are just leading them to the tomb...

SO TRUE, even in the first parts of the show, there was already so much conflict so its all just a mountain of genetic/era specific stupidity AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

this hyperfixation made me realise i have that pride? strong feeling to the ancestry? that corlys possessed (as he said but we know).

ah you mean the illigitimate thing. nah fr he kinda messed up with that too but he's not wrong about the names thing. i understand what you mean, there is discomfort in the idea of knowingly letting someone who is clearly not your heir be heir. but at the same time, the kids became his heir by choice. blood is not the only determination of family.

i feel SO sorry about this all. it's really scary how such a strong house, a great cultural inheritance is ruined by a bunch of morons. personally, i see it as an enormous tragedy.

literally the story of humanity

i can't empathise with mere people beside to the great history. but i did. i cried more times than one. still the mark of a good work. it made me empathise with the people that are TT annoying TT

DAMN IF IT MADE YOU EMPATHIZE WITH ANNOYING PEOPLE IT FR GOOD AHHAHAAHH

i was crying like a bitch over both scenes when daemon put the crown on his brother's/rhaenyra's head. i felt so sorry about all these relationships of the brothers.

so true those scenes showed how daemon albeit greedy and despicable, still cared for things in his life, as most evil people do. the best example i have is hitler (not that im saying daemon is like hitler rip rip T_T just listen) lashflkahsfash i remember seeing a post with a pic of hitler carrying this child; people were saying it was chilling because well it was hitler with a child, why would someone who wants to kill people and wage war look so friendly with a child??? someone responded by saying something like people forget that at his core, hitler was just a dude that REALLY REALLY wanted to do have his way and he just genuinely believed in what he was doing. smth like that. again its unfair to liken a fictional criminal with AN ACTUAL WAR CRIMINAL DICTATOR so lets leave it at that.

i cried over aegon's whole story. he's a twat. but boys with glossy eyes...

so true actually. when he asked his mom if she loves her T_T i felt that. T_T he like me fr T_T i felt the helplessness of him. he's just a kid who happened to be born an heir lol and just wants a hug

the way young aemond said 'do not mourn me, mother'??? boy wtf??

SO TRUE T_T aemond was so emotionally responsible for that it breaks my heart that a child knew how to be like that T_T

i wanted to say who's my fav but tumblr is mad at me for sending long asks. a reason to send a love letter. and! *imagine the furious emoji* yesterday i was literally watching it till 8 am to finish it in time and to not pay for the full subscription bc hotd is literally the one show i've watched in a year but?? they just took the money earlier??

not to be a bad influence but you can always you know what it the noncorrect way wink wink HAHAHAHAHAH

i'm furious but i'm gonna cry if they don't answer my messages TT take care! kiss you good morning or good night or good day! luv u<з

i send you a hug, you can cry on my shoulder. im luv u

xxx

[thegirlwhorideslikeasamurai]

I feel your sentiment. It doesn't feel like Yuuri at all. That he's not the type for a hook-up was one of the things that struck me early on. Just like that Viktor was his first love. I wonder if the impression that he might make out with random guys at a party comes from the Sochi banquet footage, although he possibly only threw himself at Viktor because he was already his idol / celebrity crush. Not every person feels the urge to make sexual experiences and I only need to look at the sober version of Yuuri to highly doubt such a scenario.

Interestingly, my after my ace!Yuuri post, I was lumped into the second group of people you've mentioned by--who would have thought--an acephobe who decided to pick a fight and even went so far as insisting that asexuals don't exist in Japan, which is a tangent I better don't go off on.

Since you've mentioned amatonormativity/allonormativity, I'd like to add that I've observed a third group that seems to be related to the "Yuuri cannot possibly not be an inexperienced bachelor"-faction, although I'm not sure in which way. They believe that Yuuri has or has had crushes on characters he's friends with, basically because they smile at each other and blush (note: YOI characters blush all the time because it's an anime and even actual humans blush for all kind of reasons), and with utter conviction call it canon. While I can see the appeal in that for a headcanon or a canon-divergent story if one enjoys shipping Yuuri x friend, especially for fans of the friends-to-lovers trope (let's be frank, falling in love with your best friend is one of the best ways to fall in love), the existence of such a love interest would rip some screaming plot holes into the storyline because, like I've discussed above, it would massively alter Yuuri's love life and consequently, how he tackles his season's theme (I'm planning to discuss that in a future post because I feel that discussion is overdue). However, these logical issues seem to become irrelevant whenever amatornomative/allonormative standards are involved.

(Guys, if you don't know the different kinds of attraction, if you don't know how aesthetic and platonic attraction are different form romantic and sexual attraction, please for the love of god educate yourselves on the Split Attraction Model. It's very useful knowlegde that might even help you discover some new sides of yourself. I promise.)

In relation to that, I've just remembered an interesting aspect of Yuuri's characterisation.

The creators talked in interviews about men from Kyushu not going after flower [a love interest] they don't stand a chance with. However, Yuuri absolutely breaks this stereotype. And that tells us:

If there had been someone before Viktor (crush, relationship etc.),

Yuuri would not call Viktor the first he wants to hold on to and never let go. Because Viktor wouldn't be that person, he would be the second, the third, the fourth whatsoever. Yuuri would have pursued that other person, successfully or not. Or, in the rather unlikely case that he didn't go after that particular flower for whichever reason, he would have had intense feelings.

However, Yuuri is alone as the story begins, impling that he was unsuccessful in such a theoretical past endeavour because a) they broke up, b) his love died, or c) it was unrequited.

Either way, the result of that would have been as disastrous as the Grand Prix Final of tears. Like the GPF of tears shattered Yuuri's dream to meet Viktor as an equal and prompted him to rethink his career, such a disastrous experience with love would have forced Yuuri to think about love. Like A LOT. Because, come on, you cannot be in love and not think about love for even one second.

Pursuing his "flower" is no contradiction to Yuuri being shy, introverted, being hyperfixated on Viktor since he was a pre-teen, and evidently being on the asexual spectrum, and it absolutely negates the "innocent boy that needs to be coddled"-take.

If you want Yuuri to have had someone before Viktor, if you want him to have had a crush before, write an AU or canon divergence and go wild, but please don't call it canon when it's not even compliant with that.

Thank you for this addendum! I second every word you said.

PS: Let's die on that hill together! 💜💙

On Yuuri's "top-secret" love life

Edit: Due to turning this post into a thread for the dead-bird site, I gave it a complete overhaul because some parts were wordy and confusing.

I took a deeper look into the information YOI gives us about Yuuri’s history with love and the implactions for his character arc.

Let’s start with when Viktor introduces the two Yuris to their new short programmes:

A first examination of the subject of love usually happens in puberty when the average person experiences their first crush. However, 23-year-old Yuuri just cluelessly shakes his head when Viktor asks whether he’s ever thought about love.

Since Yuuri has an evasive nature when feeling pushed or embarrassed, we can assume that he’s not hiding things here. Also interesting in this context, is his interpretation of Agape:

Yuuri is projecting his own experiences with love into his interpretation of On Love: Agape and Eros and his answers reflect where he’s currently at in his journey of exploring love. (for further discussion please check this meta).

Japanese language distinguishes general love 愛 (“ai”) from romantic/passionate love 恋 (“koi”). These terms roughly approximate the Greek concepts of agape and eros as they are utilised in YOI. However, YOI doesn't draw the distinction between 愛 and 恋 but uses 愛 (“ai”) as the overarching concept that includes other forms or love, e.g. せいてきな愛 (“sexual love”).

Until Viktor introduces the two Yuris into On Love: Agape and Eros, Yuuri has never wasted a thought on love. Which means:

Until the end of episode 2, Yuuri has never had romantic feelings for another person.

Why can we be so sure of that?

Even a first crush inevitably inspires an examination of love to some extent regardless of whether you’re happy in love, whether your feelings aren’t reciprocated or whether you decide not to act upon them.

If Yuuri had experienced such feelings before episode 2/3, he would know. And we would know, too, because it would impact his views on love, how he tackles his season’s theme, and how he goes about his relationship with Viktor. It would notably impact his character journey.

Instead, YOI introduces us to the extent of Yuuri’s parasocial obsession with Viktor that despite the gay-coding is too abstract to qualify as an actual crush. The Japanese term for “idol” that YOI uses for the people Yuuri idolises is the neutral 憧れの人 = “someone to look up to/admire”.

For the story of YOI to work as it does, Yuuri never having had romantic feelings is crucial.

Yuuri has one-track-mind that makes Viktor the fulcrum of his existence since he discovered Viktor at the onset of puberty (aka when young people start experiencing attraction for the first time). He has every poster of Viktor at least twice, he copied his programmes and he even named his poodle Katsuki Viktor (yes, that’s canon). In his endeavour to face Viktor as an equal on the ice, he move abroad to train with different coach. The show portrays Yuuri as being more interested in skating [to pursue Viktor] than in spending time with his friends, not that he'd be great at forming relationships in the first place because he's super awkward. Doesn’t sound like someone who even has the mind to notice potential partners around them, does it?

Now let’s move on to the press conference at the end of episode 5 that comprises Yuuri’s journey of exploring love and gives us some more insight into his views on love.

Since the subs are low-key confusing, I’m not quoting them, but you can check this translation to educate yourself on all the nuances that the official translation misses. Particularly interesting is this part:

My love. It’s not [general] love or romantic love that is easy to understand, but my bond with Victor, and the lukewarm way I feel about my family and my local community.

Note that this is the only time the anime uses 恋 ("koi"), probably because he's speaking to a Japanese audience.

Note that this is the only time the anime uses 恋 (“koi”), probably because he’s speaking to a Japanese audience.

This line give us clear idea on how Yuuri feels about the people in his life that are not Viktor, confirming what we’ve could already guess from context: that his relationships so far never reached a level that is intimate enough to enforce an examination of the subject of love. We tend to take our friends and family for granted, but crushes and falling in love are feelings that take over our lives.

Yuuri’s speech about love as a whole showcases that he has come a long way from utter cluelessness to the matured and nuanced idea of love that he now explaines to his audience. He was able to arrive at this point because his time with Viktor sparked the examination of the subject. Yuuri draws a clear distinction between his feelings for his family and friends and his feelings for Viktor, which aren’t lukewarm at all.

A more accurate translation of that line is: “The first person I want to tie myself to and never let go is Viktor” ( 初めて自分から繋ぎとめたいと思った人、それがヴィクトルです) because 繋ぎとめたい means wanting to tie someone / something to you and never let it go (see this translation error masterpost).

After months of getting to know Viktor intimately, Yuuri has fallen in love with Viktor at last. This feeling is bigger than any emotion he has experienced before because it’s greater than 恋 and 愛 and because of that:

This feeling doesn't have a name, but I decided to dare to call it "love".

Yuuri is awkward and anxious, but he’s determined to pursue a goal he committed himself to. For half his life that goal was Viktor, first as an abstract concept and as an ideal to strive for, later as a romantic interest, and he makes sure the world knows.

If Yuuri had had romantic feelings for someone else, he would have pursued this person or ruled out the idea because Viktor was more important and it would have impacted his views on love either way.

Or in other words:

Viktor is Yuuri's first love.

I will discuss the gay-coding of how Yuuri idolises people that inspire him in another post because this seems to be one of the lesser known facts.

For this analysis I've reviewed the entire context of Yuuri's history with love and ruled out everything that doesn't withstand scrutiny or makes no sense in the grand scheme of things (aka the canon of YOI as a whole). You are free to headcanon Yuuri as having had crushes or relationships before Viktor, but keep in mind that this would alter the plot of YOI.

Friendly reminder: friendship, admiration, and aesthetic attraction are often misconstrued as romantic attraction due to allonormative/amatonormative paradigms. When interpreting fictional characters, the entire context must be reviewed to check whether there is more to that.

[thebibliosphere]

Hello bibliomum, I have a question about ADHD for you and the rest of the bibliofam: I know that people with ADHD can forget entire conversations, but can the opposite happen? As in, you remember an entire conversation you wanted to have with someone but it never actually happened? Hope you're doing alright!

I'm not sure it's unique to ADHD, but I know for me, I tend to hyperfixate on social interactions more than I forget them.

It's a form of hypervigilance, and I likely developed it as a coping mechanism to avoid accusations of being scatterbrained/lazy/not paying attention. Ironically, this means that sometimes I pay too much attention, and that can also annoy people.

For me, this hypervigilance can look like replaying conversations in my head on an endless loop, trying to figure out where I probably went "wrong" or why the interaction felt "weird" or trying to make sure I really understood them without wanting to ask again. This happens more often with people who react with hostility to being asked to clarify what they're saying when I don't understand something "basic."

Finding out that many people often speak passively and say one thing but mean another really helped me understand why I struggle with specific social cues and why it always felt like I wasn't connecting with people. Making friends with other folks with ADHD really helped with that and made me realize I don't suck at being around people, I just suck at dealing with certain types of communication styles.

I will also often practice what I'm going to say in my head to avoid the physical pain socially awkward scenarios cause me, and occasionally this can sometimes lead to my brain going, "all right, good talk." Then I just... forget to talk to the person because as far as my brain is concerned, we did the thing. We got the dopamine from practicing the (potentially) stressful thing, so clearly, we don't need to do it again.

I do this more often with emails and text messages rather than face to face with people. But it has definitely happened where I thought I'd replied or said something, but turns out I was just thinking it really hard, lol. Likely when I was also trying to anticipate the right moment to actually say it out loud, so I wasn't being rude or interrupting the other person without meaning to.

Brains are fun.

[pinnochiro]

pinn reviews - final fantasy xv

a long ramble about final fantasy fifteen that sort of looks like a review, as written by someone who finished the game fifteen minutes ago and needs to get these words out of his head. spoilers inbound.

i'm a pretty big fan of video games. i don't know what my first was, but it was probably either banjo and kazooie or mario kart 64, at my cousin's house when i was very small. i think that video games as a medium are so interesting, since the fact that video games are inherently interactive changes the way that they tell any story. it's a shame that despite loving video games so much, i'm absolutely terrible at them.

i'm absolute dogshit at video games. whenever i boot up something new, i always play on easy mode because. i'm that bad. unfortunately, this means that a lot of video games are simply. impossible for me to beat. that's fine, as at the moment i live with my good friend lizz, who is certifiably Good at Video Games, and so we've been playing video games together for a little bit now. typically this means that she will actually play the majority of the game while i sit with her and watch, but occasionally i'll have a go, but she'll end up with the controller as soon as a boss fight or puzzle or a mechanic i just can't seem to grasp shows up. we recently played through the entirety of the kingdom hearts series together, and this was an absolute blast of a time. i'm glad to say that i adore kingdom hearts now, and it's become one of my hyperfixations, which you might be able to tell from my icon. but we'd finished the kingdom hearts series, and we were left to move onto something else. we'd also played final fantasy 7 remake, so in my wisdom, i suggested that we play another final fantasy game.

we looked through the ff games that were already purchased on our consoles thanks to lizz's uncle, and eventually, we decided that we should play. all of them. however to start, we were going to play final fantasy xv, 15, and work our way backwards through the mainline, single-player games.

i'd heard that xv wasn't very good, but honestly, i was still quite curious. one person who i'd been following on twitter for years was pretty obsessed with the main party members, to the point where i knew their names and what-not even though i didn't have much of an idea what the game itself was about. i remember watching a video by supereyepatchwolf a few years ago about how the game sucked, but i couldn't remember much of the details, and i knew, based on my obsession with kingdom hearts, that xv had started as a different game called final fantasy versus xiiv. i don't know all the details about versus thirteen, but i do know that it was originally helmed by the creator of my beloved kingdom hearts, mr tetsuya nomura, and that after many years, the vast majority of the game was thrown out, nomura wasn't in charge any more, and the whole thing was rewritten and reworked, which sounds like a fairly rough development cycle. but so what, i don't care about gameplay. i want to play the video game with those cute guys that i see fanart of on twitter, and lizz seemed happy enough to play through it with me.

and so we started final fantasy xv. i've been told that since the game was practically dead on arrival, they threw in a bunch of new content and reworked a lot of the early game before i got my hands on it. so my gameplay started with a scene of the four guys fighting some demon dude on fire and they're all old and grotty. whatever, that cutscene ends and we're put into a combat tutorial. that's over and we're on the road in what looks to be central america, pushing a car.

our four leading lads are noctis, the prince of the lucis empire, his best friend prompto, his bodyguard, gladio, and his chef and other things, ignis. i do quite like the main four members of the party in xv. prompto is quite easily my favourite, voiced by robbie daymond of goro akechi fame and with a bunch of fun little animations and quips that make him very likeable. he gets extremely excited at the idea of riding chocobos and has what i considered the best scene of the game, where he and noctis meet on a motel rooftop and discuss prompto's imposter syndrome, since he's only part of noctis' official retinue as his best friend. noctis is a fairly typical main protagonist, he's in love with a woman he hasn't seen in eight years and needs to go marry her or something, i don't care. gladio is a tough macho man with a mullet who wears leather jackets and wields a greatsword, and is apparently only 22, which is at least 10 years younger than i assumed. ignis is a strategist and chef, who takes on the most authoritative role and constantly tells noctis to not drive his car at night. i was not a fan of ignis at the start, but he grew on me, especially with how hard the game hit me with his personal arc. the four boys are off, driving to noctis' wedding in a different country across the desert when their car breaks down. we then run into the first issue of the game.

cindy is a mechanic. she also has her ass and tits out constantly, like your sleazy uncle's shirt with a naked woman was instead semi-alive as a video game person. she fixes your car and acts fairly sexual and it's just like. why do we have to do this. aren't we over overtly sexualised women in video games who have no reason for the way they dress other than the character designer was horny? whatever, i like women as much as the next guy, but cindy's design just. makes me feel so uncomfortable.

anyways you get to do a little driving around with the boys, until you stay the night before catching the boat to your fiance. overnight, you find out that noctis' kingdom has been basically destroyed by an invading empire called niflheim, and practically everyone noctis knows, including his father, are dead. you learn that noctis and his bride to be are also assumed dead, with noctis hearing his own death announcement on the radio. the game has a bunch of added cutscenes that are actually footage from the three-hour-long prequel movie that came out after the game, are extremely hard to follow and honestly i had no idea what i was looking at. anyways, noctis' family is dead, so it's time to do some hunting sidequests.

that brings us to the combat, i suppose. rather than the turn-based or even active turn-based combat that the series is known for, xv opts for more modern action rpg-styled combat. i was, naturally, terrible at this, but i managed to get around it with the fact that. it is almost impossible to die in this video game, provided you have enough items. the game allows you so much time to heal yourself that there's practically no way to have your entire party wipe unless you're doing absolutely terrible, and even then, your party members will probably try and heal you themselves before that happens. lizz tells me that the combat is boring, you just push the same button over and over and then you win. i do appreciate that, for someone like me who is terrible at reading enemy movements, there is a giant button that pops up on screen that tells you when to push the block button, but even then i was prone to fucking it up. whether that's the bad game design or my terrible gaming abilities is up to you to decide. anyways, the game is fairly easy but has annoying combat, your teammates limit breaks will only land about 50% of the time (or never, if you are gladio) and i was still bad at it, so i didn't have all that much fun.

instead of an active levelling system, the game will only tally your character's level ups when you either make camp or visit a hotel. camping is, in my opinion, the only saving grace of this game. each time you make camp, you get to see the characters doing fun little camping activities together and just hanging out, ignis will cook up a new meal in a dramatic fashion and everyone will compliment him and eat it off their coleman's branded plates, it's just very fun. you also get to see what pictures prompto has taken, which is one of my favourite gameplay features. prompto's passion is photography, and while i support him in this wholeheartedly, his picture taking skills are, quite frankly, awful. the game will randomly take shots while you're on the move, which leaves you with a delightful selection of awkward poses, characters hidden behind bushes, pictures taken while someone is half-dead in combat, and snaps where the natural lighting absolutely makes it impossible to tell what's going on. it's hilarious and going through prompto's collection of photos each night is honestly the best part of the game. we managed to wind up with a few shots that, even despite being scripted events, turned out absolutely terrible, and i will cherish those forever.

anyways, since noctis' father and fiance are dead, that leaves him the king of lucis. the only important person to make it out of the capital alive tells you to drive to the middle of nowhere, where he randomly springs on you. hey. go into a bunch of these dungeons and absorb a bunch of swords, this is your destiny as king and how you will defeat the empire. noctis goes, uh, alright i guess, and you're set loose again to wander around for a bit collecting the 'royal arms'. this plot point wasn't explained well but hey, whatever, we're collecting the glowy swords and that's fine.

you're introduced at some point to ardyn, the main antagonist. he's old, kind of groady and wears a fedora. he's a dick to you and talks about his automobeeel. apparently my friend miri thinks he's hot, she is wrong.

i can't remember what happens specifically but you're told that your fiance is still alive and in fantasy venice, and she's talking to the gods on your behalf to borrow their powers. there's a mission where you follow some purple trees that are electric, and you do that i guess. i enjoyed riding the chocobos around, but couldn't care much for the plot at this point. ardyn leads you to a volcano, where you fight a giant lava god. he tries to step on you and i, a denizen of the internet and with an active fear of foot fetishists, was extremely uncomfortable. noctis becomes friends with foot man and a lightning god who lived in those trees, and ardyn steals your car.

very upset by this, noctis and his gang risk everything to sneak into a military base and steal it back. because this is a video game, this works out fine.

there's a little mining city which is all about Girl Power, because all the Women run the Mining Industry like Girl Bosses, and you hang around there for a bit. because all the women are so Empowered, they wear bikinis all the time with overalls over the top. gladio decides he needs to fuck off for a bit, i have no idea what he does since i haven't played the dlc, and then he comes back with another scar. you hang out with his sixteen year old sister, who has a crush on the engaged and 20-year old noctis, and then you drive her to a lighthouse. when she's in your party, she can't really fight, but she gets a pink chocobo and i thought that was very cute. we turned out own chocobo white and lizz named him 'jones' after a mount she has in ffxiv.

eventually, you have a long boat ride over to fantasy venice. this is the part where the game stops being 'fun with a few issues in combat and a rushed and poorly told story.' the open world, which was a main feature with a bunch of little areas to find where noctis can fish, little hunting sidequests and random photo spots where prompto takes touristy photos, is now gone, and it will not return for the entire rest of the game. you can 'go back in time', but the open world was the most enjoyable part of the game, and it kind of really sucks that the main story doesn't let you have any more freedom like that.

after arriving in fantasy venice, you have a talk with fantasy hillary clinton and beg her to let your girlfriend summon a god into the middle of her city. hillary agrees, and you don't get to meet up with your fiance, because even if the game is constantly telling you how much noctis loves her, there is. barely any interactions between the two in the entire game. from what i can tell, they met when noctis was a child and they haven't seen each other in ten years but are still fantasy dog pen-pals. noctis marrying her was supposed to make an alliance or something like that, but her brother has betrayed her to the army. noctis' girlfriend is also an oracle, which means she can heal people, i guess? everyone talks about how important she is and she's constantly telling people that she needs to use her powers to help noctis but she's practically a non-entity.

as can be expected of most female love interests in a game primarily focused on men, noctis' fiance is killed while summoning a god for noctis to befriend. noct gets very mad about this, and turns super saiyan and kills the god back, but his girlfriend is dead and that's super sad you guys. there's a beautiful prerendered cutscene where she says goodbye to noctis but since we barely know her, and we've only been told over and over that they're in love without anything to actually well, show this, it didn't have much of an impact. fantasy venice is destroyed, and ignis is blinded while trying to help calm the giant raging god.

iggy's blindness and how the game makes you account for this and grow to care for him was one of the highlights, in my opinion, as well as crushingly depressing. while i'm not disabled and have no right to say if this was 'good disabled representation' or anything like that, i believe that the game handles it decently enough. the group falls apart as noctis is upset about his girlfriend, gladio is extremely mad that noctis won't care for ignis, and prompto just wants everyone to get along. there's a mission where gladio constantly yells at you passive aggressive things to noctis about how he's a cunt for running, which is obnoxious, but the character arc itself is fairly strong. when you make camp, ignis can't cook anymore, so everyone eats cup noodles in a depressing ass cutscene. ignis remains in your party for the rest of the game despite his disability, and he doesn't magically regain his sight like other fantasy media would do, which at the very least i think is good. i'm not sure what the opinion of actual disabled people is of the character, considering how often disabled characters are either turned into misery porn to make the abled audience be glad that isn't them and if ignis' arc falls into this trap, but i hope that it wasn't handled too poorly, as that would just be another terrible mark in this game's list of bad moves.

the characters eventually make it to the evil empire's capital, which is abandoned and filled with daemons. the characters learn that ardyn is super evil and taught the king of the empire how to turn humans into daemons, which has now happened to the entire city. the 'magitek suits', presumed to be enchanted armour that fights as the empire's infantry, actually house the souls of the human-turned daemons. honestly i like this as a plot point but the game handles it pretty terribly. there could have been more lead up to this, the explanation is pretty lacking, and prompto's Big Plot Twist is. terribly handled. turns out that prompto was born in the empire and was going to be one of those empty soldier daemons, but he was rescued by people belonging to noctis' empire. not that the game tells you that. instead, prompto goes 'turns out i'm one of ... them' and Does Not Elaborate. The game doesn't tell you shit, not about prompto's past, not about how he feels about this, not about how anyone else feels about this either because the other party members just go 'oh that sucks, good thing you're not evil' and the scene ends. robbie daymond tries so hard to sell these terrible, terrible lines, and it almost entirely fails, i'm so sorry prompto. fortunately because i'm a nosy ass, i read prompto's wikia page and knew the plot twist ahead of time, because i don't think i would have even registered it if i didn't.

anyways everyone in the evil empire is dead and ardyn starts talking about how he's immortal and an ancient king of noctis' country but the gods thought he sucked because he's too evil. i missed most of this because the cats got the zoomies and were dashing across the couch right in the middle of his speech so i can't tell you anything else. noctis tries to get a big magic crystal to fight him and instead. gets schlorped inside.

TEN YEARS LATER

yes then ten years actually pass while noctis is asleep. the game shows this by switching the head on noctis' character model to have a beard, but that's it, no changes in animations or whatever. the sky is permanently night and only one human civilisation remains, the rest destroyed by daemons. as a plot point, this ends up feeling. extremely worthless. why was noctis asleep for ten whole goddamn years? so we can wake up and go 'damn it sucks out here'. but it's barely even a like, incentive to fix everything, because you have a long talk with a former child you were friends with where he talks about how humanity is still going fine and everyone's okay and the world has moved on without you. it feels. pointless. when you meet up with your party members, they are exactly as you left them, only with slightly different character models. there is no change in the voice performance, the character's movements or how they talk to show that they've been without you for ten years. they barely mention it. i'm just. so confused as to why they decided that a ten year timeskip was the way to go? since nothing really changes, couldn't you have made it like, two years? one year? six months?? have the characters react a little more? something??? at least if it was only a year or so i wouldn't have to deal with the fact that noctis looks like norman reedus with his shitty facial hair now.

anyways after that there's a bunch of long and boring boss fights. you fight some dead kings for some reason, your party members get a little bit to talk about how cool they are and how much they love noctis, and then you meet up with ardyn. there's another boring boss fight and god this was only a few hours ago but it's already gone from my head. you summon the gods and the old kings to beat the shit out of him after you both go super saiyan again? there's incredible music but it feels barely earned and just kind of eh. anyways, noctis dies, which was the price of using the crystal of light or whatever the fuck. his ghost marries his fiance's ghost finally, and they smile as they look at one of prompto's pictures. you can pick any picture you want to go here, and then the credits roll, showing all of the pictures you saved of prompto's shots. showing me all the pictures at the end is honestly lovely, but it really only served to remind me of how much more fun the game was in the first half. and that's the end, of final fantasy xv.

so what did i think of the story? it's terribly cobbled together and struggles to get you to feel anything and play out all the plot beats. you feel awful for the countless employees who spent years working on the beautiful cutscenes only to have them be in this game, which sucks and the story barely gets through. there were parts that i enjoyed, mostly the thing about the daemons being people, but honestly the rest of it is a mess. it's hard to follow at the best of times and just awkward and terribly written at the worst. the ending is cheap, and it doesn't feel like you've actually accomplished anything. i left that game feeling numb and empty, sad that i'd wasted so much time to end up with such a colossal failure of a conclusion.

i had fun with the game when it was my four little guys running around doing sidequests and camping together. after the midway point of the game, there's none of that, and you're bogged down into a plot that just pushes you from point a to point b and boring overlong bossfight to boring overlong bossfight. the character moments between your party are a lot of fun, but the second you hit fantasy venice, everything is pretty much on rails and you can't do anything except what the game tells you explicitly to do.

should you play this game? no lol. if anything i've mentioned about the story interests you, you'll be better off watching a lore video or reading the wiki. if you do want to play it after all that, just don't proceed after the myrthril refining quest, it's pretty much all downhill from there. will i play the dlc? unlikely, i think lizz and i will just watch a cutscene movie of those.

this game left me feeling empty and numb and not in a fun way. i wanted, so, so hard to like this game, and it all crashed around me in a beautifully overproduced and confusingly written cascade. i love you prompto, but even your cute little freckly face and terrible photography can't save this trainwreck of a game.

tl;dr - final fantasy xv sucks. i hope that 13, our next ff game, will be better.

[kyutown]

hi!! i hope you're doing well! could i get a ship with ateez, stray kids and txt? basics: i'm a 99 liner (21) and i'm 160cm (5'2). i dye my hair all the time but rn it's short and bright pink!! i'm infj and a virgo, and my favourite aesthetics are lovecore and kidcore! i have a very bright aesthetic :') personality: i'm the type of person that's really quiet around strangers and i find it really hard to talk to them, but around friends i can get loud! it takes ages for me to truly open up, but i'm a very loyal friend once i know to trust you. i'm the friend that makes snarky side comments that makes people laugh. my type of humour is sarcasm :') if i'm comfortable, i can talk for hours about the things i like, and it's hard for me to stop (i have adhd, i infodump too much). i don't voice out my own opinions a lot, but i have very strong personal values and i'm slowly starting to figure myself out likes & hobbies: my three great passions are writing, fashion and gaming! i'm a creative writing major and i really love writing poetry and playing around with form. i have a very bright fashion style lol, i don't like wearing all black or monochrome outfits myself. i love playing all kinds of games, but i'm too scared of horror.. i also like stuff like anime, loud and fast paced music, rock music and animals!! i love anything cute and bright! love: i'm a huge hopeless romantic!! i love reading and listening about love and people in love, but i'm a bit hesitant on love for myself. it takes a while for me to open up due to past experiences, and i will need my own personal space, so i'd like for them to initiate rather than me, but i'm very affectionate and loyal!! i don't really have an ideal type, but i want a 'best friend' type of love. i just want someone who's willing to understand and be patient with me, and someone willing to listen to me talk about my current hyperfixation at 2 in the morning lol. my love language is words of affirmation! i love giving and receiving compliments this is so long omfg- but thank you so much!! <3

hi! thank you for responding!

for ateez, i think yeosang would be a nice pair for you! yeosang would be the one who would always listen to you and would always be caring towards you! no matter what, he would always be sweet, understanding, patient, loyal and would love to have conversations with you!

for stray kids, i think hyunjin would be a good fit with you! hyunjin would love to read with you and would enjoy listening to all types of music with you! since you like fast paced music, you would probably enjoy him rapping or singing a fast paced stray kids song! he would love to rap/sing in front of you and if you join, it would be even more fun!

for txt, i think huening kai would match well! i feel huening kai would be the best friend type as he would play around and joke around with you! he would also like animals and anything cute and bright like plushies! he would enjoy bright colors and i think since you guys would wear colorful clothes and have a bright smile on your faces, you guys would spread bright energy!

[kcabyap]

You're very welcome! Thank you again for asking; I love getting to talk about these lovely characters, I'm so fond of all of them 😭

I'll definitely elaborate, but I'll apologise in advance because this may get rather long! I have a habit of going on and on 😅

So! Mammon is joint-favourite because he's just so caring and protective; he really cares about MC above all else, he's sweet and can hardly tell a lie to save himself, he's funny and far more emotionally intuitive than he lets on. Sure, he's a tsundere, but who wouldn't be shy about admitting their true feelings when they're used to being mocked? (Plus, he clearly has ADHD - as evidenced by how he sucked at math until he associated it with money, something he's hyperfixated on - and I do too, so that's relatable!)

Lucifer is a divisive character, I know, but I love him a lot; I'm an absolute sucker for the way he realises his love and care for MC throughout the story, how he comes across so single-minded and cold at first but there's so much warmth and love hidden under there, how he takes on so much all by himself even at his own detriment... plus, I do often like antagonists, and he was a very alluring antagonistic figure in season 1; the balance between conflict and sexual tension between him and MC was delightful!

Speaking of divisive characters, I know Belphie is as well, but I love a good redemption arc story; sure, he killed MC, but... who (apart from Mammon) hasn't tried to kill MC--? And yes, he lied to them for a long while, but once he got over his hatred of humans he became one of the most directly loving and caring towards MC, which was just adorable to see. I think his character development was really good and made him really interesting. (Plus, again, very relatable: I would sleep all day if I could too--)

Next up is Levi, who once again, is very relatable! I too am a shut-in who has a bunch of fictional loves and mainly speaks in quotes from video games... but, he's got all that, and he's this really powerful admiral who can summon a sea monster! And he has all these cool qualities, yet the poor baby doesn't see how wonderful he is! So it's honestly so precious to see him get more comfortable with his Henry MC as the story goes on... yeah, I'm so fond of this lad, I really am!

Now at first, I didn't exactly understand Satan very well; don't get me wrong, I liked him, but I found it odd how he wasn't very wrathful despite his sin. But looking into his character - about his identity issues, not knowing quite who he is and trying so hard to understand himself, wanting to be a person in his own right away from Lucifer, coming to terms with his own feelings - I quickly realised he's honestly very complex and his development is touching and beautiful, in a way I love a lot.

Next is Diavolo, and when it comes to Diavolo... I actually have some strong words: I don't like how it seems he took advantage of Lilith's death to get Lucifer - someone Diavolo was arguably in love with, or at least crushing on or extremely fond of from afar - on his side when he couldn't protest. But, despite that... I can't dislike him, I tried but I can't; he's very sweet and his ideals are wonderful and my goodness the poor man is so lonely, he needs more friends, I can't help but want to hug him.

Then there's Asmo, who was actually my favourite for a short while when I first started playing! He's very sweet and supportive as a friend, I think he'd be a lot of fun to party with and I'd love to pick his brain about skincare and fashion, but... I do wish he'd stop trying to sleep with his brothers, and people who've very clearly said no! But he's also very charming and interesting; I think the contrast between the image he projects and his true self, with his insecurities, is interesting.

Next is Simeon, and like Diavolo, I have words for this man! I personally think he's up to no good; he's referred to in one of his cards as the 'angel of scheming,' his part in the angel event really made me question his motives, and he's involved with Michael who I'm pretty sure is antagonist material... but! I love a good antagonist, so I don't mean that as a bad thing. Simeon seems adorable and interesting, but I want to know more about him, and what he's really after.

Now, Beel... I love Beel, I do, he's just like a big hungry puppy and he's very sweet; his whole struggle about Lilith's death and his bond with Belphegor are also very touching. And I love him! ...I just don't know how I'd have a conversation with him when he's so focused on food all the time... I'd like it if he'd talk more about his other interests, like fangol or exercise or gym culture; or if we could see what he's like during a sports match, that'd be fun!

I! Want! To see! Lilith! All we know about her is that she was reincarnated as a human who was MC's ancestor, she was the eighth sibling who was especially close to Beel and Belphie, Lucifer loved her and once held her hand, she once slept next to Mammon when he was scared, she can speak to MC... but that's it! She has the potential to be really interesting, and I'd really like to see more about her someday.

Solomon... I mean no harm to any Solomon stans, but I don't really have a lot to say about Solomon at all. I don't dislike him! I think he's a really interesting take on the biblical King Solomon - I wonder if this Solomon also has several hundred wives? - but for me, he's just... kinda... there. His VA is very sweet and interesting, though!

And I can kind of say the same for Barbatos too; I don't dislike him, his powers are very cool and I'd quite like to see more of them in future, some of his card art is very beautiful, but... he's just... kinda... there. Again, sorry to any Barbatos stans!

Now, Michael... we don't know a lot about him, but there's evidence piling up that seems very much like he's going to be some kind of antagonist - which, again, isn't a negative! - but his part in the angel event, where he was basically responsible for the brothers being brainwashed into acting like their angel selves? Ohoho, Mike, buddy, you just did something Very Bad to my boys. Do not trust him at all, despite how nice he seemed to be acting in that one conversation with MC.

And as I said, Luke and Little D No. 2 are my adorable lil' children! They're precious and I just want to protect them and see them grow up healthy 🥺

Can I get a Favourites List (from Most to Least) for the entire Obey Me! Cast, if you don't mind....?

I just like seeing different opinions & things...

-------------

Plus, it's the easiest way I can think of interacting with people, lol...

Oooooh, I don't mind at all! Actually, I thought a couple times about making a post like this but I didn't know if anyone would be interested, so thank you for asking! ❤

So, I'll first preface this by saying: I Love All Of Them. Honestly, there's no-one in the game I actively dislike too much, and I'm soft for most everyone. The order of this list does change around sometimes, but this is how it is right now!

The Favourites List~

Mammon and Lucifer

Belphegor

Leviathan

Satan

Diavolo

Asmodeus

Simeon

Beelzebub

Lilith

Solomon

Barbatos

Michael

(Luke and Little D. No. 2 get their own category for being my children who I want to adopt-- 🥺)