#but i do miss summer evenings
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I miss summer sunsets by the sea so much
#its been very cold the past few days#and i long to be sitting at a beach#eating a nectarine#having the early evening breeze dry my hair leaving them tangled and salty#watching the sun set and the first stars appear#knowing that when we go home we will fry some eggplants and zucchinis#my mom will bring out the ouzo#and we'll sit at the balcony and talk and laugh#i dont miss the heat or the fear for fires at all#but i do miss summer evenings#personal
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Some of my favourite 'not fan art' pieces I did this year! Hope to draw even more original work in the coming one
#It's been really freeing to draw my own silly little ideas or OCs this year#I do love fan art and drawing characters I love but it's nice to have a choice#Maybe next year I'll draw even more original stuff. Even if it's vent art or maybe a zine idk#I really miss the spring/summer I was in a cowboy mood tbh. Can't wait for warmer weather to come back#art#sketch#character art#horror#gore#original character#original art
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kiddos
#pokemon#pokemon rby#pokemon frlg#trainer red#champion red#blue oak#green oak#trainer leaf#trainer green#daisy oak#the kantrio are like 4-8 here#i think ive decided on my leaf hcs#'green' is a nickname so their names all match. haven't decided who gave her it yet tho#i think any of the trio. daisy. prof oak. reds mom. or even some random kid are all good choices#if its early enough it could even be one of blue's parents. i usually characterize his mom as a collector of ppl/things she finds charming#so it wouldn't be far fetched from my hcs LMAO (girl do not treat ppl as collectables this will have lasting affects on everybody)#she lives in a city but stays with her grandparents in pallet during the summer#her last summer there was kind of awkward because red and blue were going through a friendship breakup right before their journeys#like cmon guys. and she missed most of it because she was 10 and didn't have a phone#she kind of lost contact with them afterwards (more than usual) until the summer after and saw neither red and blue were in town#millie's art#art#daisy#prof oak
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#a doodley#okkk 2022: the torture chamber....i only sparsely drew al and developed talon (he was borned...) bc my mind was occupied with other things.#2023: exiting torture chamber; it took me a tiny little bit to get back to drawing and ''interacting with'' al again but i did it even#though it was a reminder of the Bad bc he's my copium#summer 2023: i view and witness media and suddenly have like 5 fictional men i cant decide on which to focus... and september (talon month)#comes along so I decide to focus on Talon after not touching him much at all throughout the entire year#(forced this btw i did not wanna do it LOL i didnt even remember how to draw him)#september 2023 to now: talon has infiltrated the brain. but i want to swivel back to al#now: i've forgotten how to Talk to al (just like i did in beginning of 2023)#(and just like i forgot how to talk to talon for most of 2023)#so ive kind of just been replaying the smunker cow al daydreams from when they first met#so I can find my way back...retracing my steps#in doing so ive kind of also forgotten how to interact with talon but still havent gotten back to al#so rn my life is so boring without imaginary bf interactions. just the before sleep plot rehashing daydreams...#or sparse visions of em Sometimes#nobody in my brain rn just like the short period last yr and its distressing#what do i draw without a love obsession.....#how do i pass time without it....! so boring. idk what to do#i miss the me of several yrs ago when i was drawing 50 different aus with al....ive downgraded in skill and imagination and creativity#so bad since then. idk. idk. i hope they come back to me soon#maybe i shld just draw al a lot which is how i kickstarted caring abt talon again almost a yr ago ?#hoping i can get him to come back before my surgery i need my big sexy boy nurse for recovery#(complaining abt things usually fixes em for me so im hoping thats the case here)
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just a girl with her mother’s full lips and her father’s cheekbones and almond eyes that resemble neither of theirs. And the Memories
#I live w him for one summer and then im like oohhhk ok that’s why u guys didn’t work out#I maybe heard “you’re JUST like your mother” 80 times on that trip#I am ………. Tbh#But ugh even if it’s in my blood not to get along w him I still miss him#And miss the capital#I’m yearning so hard rn how do I recover#Might disintegrate w the sheer magnitude of this want. Whatever
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tentaclesmod
Do you have some kind of underlying condition? Or maybe live or work in an environment that would make you susceptible (like mold growing somewhere for example)? Cause is weird how often you get sick from stuff that doesn't seem so small.
i have a compromised immune system and pre existing conditions that turned hard mode when i got covid last year and never really went back to being manageable
#replies#oldies will remember i only opened commissions the first time bc i caught miss rona#and ive never really been healthy again since then even though ive technically 'recovered'#its a little better in the summer. my lungs do better in heat than in cold
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i dont need therapy or medication i need it to be 2007. i need it to be my full time job to learn and explore and be curious about the world around me again
#crayon on envelope#i cant do any of that shit when i gotta have a job#i really miss when all i had to do was go to school#like i didnt realize how good i had it at the time#go in for like six hours and still have time and sunlight to do what i wanted when i got home#weekends off where all your friends Also have it off so you can organize hanging out#the whole summer to yourself#honestly i feel like id be doing so much better psychologically if i could have summer vacation again lol#bc at least then i was working towards something#just gotta get through the year so i can enjoy my summer#now its like. why am i even doing all of this#why is my only goal to suffer till i get a paycheck#and i dont even get to keep most of it#pointless luv litchrally pointless
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caught up this week right in time for the start of season 5… we’re so back
#i missed this show so bad it’s unreal#if u were concerned yes rita is describing riverdale plot points and YES they are one hundred percent accurate (source: me im an expert)#frankly rita would fucking adore riverdale. the world should embrace this more#anyhow. falling back into old hyperfixations is what the summer is for innit ^_^ and its nice to draw better than 2020 me could. we have fun#the penumbra podcast#tpp#jupeter#juno steel#peter nureyev#rita (tpp)#buddy aurinko#vespa ilkay#jet sikuliaq#god i stopped listening somewhere when s3 was coming out cause school was too much at the time... relistening made me tear up#feels good feels organic feels like i missed juno steel so bad and didn’t even realize tili had him back#nureyev voice do you think these louboutins are too flashy for a kombucha brewing#<- real line from riverdale. rita could attest to that. i know this in my heart
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Breaking news: Neighborhood dog enjoys a peaceful summer night's sleep under the stars <3
Snoopy #15
16/10/2024
#peanuts#snoopy#art#15#doghouse#it's not summer for me i just miss summertime as always#i love making art that looks like shit. straight up horrible.#<- that's not sarcasm#it is an important part of the art ecosystem. plus i had fun and was myself!#none of those stars are passable LMAO#this has been another 'thank god this blog isn't called onegoodsnoopyaday' type of night#snoopy homework can be kind of annoying bc every day it's like this Task that i have to do but at the same time#it's very freeing to have an 'oh this is bad but i'll have another chance at making a better drawing tomorrow' mindset every single day#(and then i rarely actually do a better one lol) (i have poor time management skills) (so it's usually a rush job at the end of the day)#but the important thing is that every tomorrow is always an OPPORTUNITY for improvement even if i do not take the opportunity
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i know what you are
#he's insufferable i hate him so much#great ace attorney#update on Thoughts: second game feels different#it plays more streamlined. there's no more wasting time repeating the same points fifty times#but i don't know. i think they set themselves up for too many inconsistencies by leaving so much unresolved in the first one#the vibe is different. the first one was more Layton-esque. this one is more Ace Attorney proper#some of the unanswered questions are reiterated differently as well and i'm like “well that's not how you phrased it in the first game..."#this is all most evident in the flashback case which is like inconsistency central. one of my least favourites of the entire franchise#but the first case is easily top 10 if not top 5 cases from the franchise for me. by no means do i hate this game#Raiten Menimemo is hot and i can say it because i don't give a fuck anymore#i'm going to sound like such a brat (and not like 360 BRAT summer. like an actual brat) but... i kinda miss the first game#... even though it took me literally three years to finish and threw multiple tirades about hating it#i think it's because i've recently finished an entire year of playing the Layton games and in my head it's reminiscent of those...#anyway..... if i find out Kazuma WASN'T topping Van Zieks i'll be very angry
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Strife! Strife! Shoot the freaking imp!!!!!
#homestuck#hs#jade harley#becquerel#bec#do people actually tag the dog#fun fact i had sketch for this piece for like. half of a year? i made it somewhen in summer i believe#tried to redrew it and figured the initial draft was ok and finished in one day. hooray#i'd say Jade's strife is my favorite one but there isn't much to choose among#so it's probably more correct to say it's one of my favorite interactive scenes#of. the first acts because i think there are more i can't remember offhand#anyway Sunslammer is a banger of an ost!!! i think there's even. space jazz vibes? whats the name.#also i did lazy shade'n'lighting here and actually fine with it#also i had to rewatch the scene before finishing the piece and auoeuegh i miss the first acts :^(#these kids are so sweet i like reading their interactions! dave and jade were fun! no matter if you see them as a ship or not#i like how it's visible that they are a friend group#amyway. i should reread homestuck#(had to reschedule this so i could have a little more time for fanarting ig)
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hey everyone send recent jance fic recs i miss them 🥹💞
#joker out#i DO miss them sorry i was so into them during the summer and now it's sort of faded a bit#but i've been thinking about it cause WOW the shipping landscape for it must be even more stellar now#vee rambles#thank you if you do thank you if you don't :^)
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seriously can catastrophes stop happening for five minutes my brain is already fried from the ones we're already experiencing
#I fucking. missed d&d tonight by accident#I straight up forgot#and just didn't show up to the session#my sleep schedule is absolutely fucked#I should be sleeping now but brain won't shut up#my creative output is the lowest it's ever been and I've been in some level of depressive funk since like early january#I am just deeply unfathomably exhausted#like mentally and spiritually#all the time#my memory and sense of time are both shit#my spelling is worse than it used to be for some reason??#I really don't know what to do to make my brain start functioning again it's frankly worrying me#I couldn't even handle college so it should come as no surprise that I'm reacting poorly to the world being a perpetual screaming trash fir#and yet#idk it's been hitting again lately that I have never succeeded at anything in my life and just keep tripping and falling up for some reason#fucking everyone is in hell right now and with my overall success rate I should be dead in a ditch but I'm actually doing spectacularly#due to a series of improbable accidents and weird circumstances that happened to turn out in my favor instead of completely fucking me#aside from the looming spectre of my various failed attempts to have some kind of life trajectory#it just doesn't feel like this can keep up forever#like surely at some point the luck has got to run out I can't just keep living like some kind of folkloric trickster archetype#but my motivation and sense of purpose kind of died after the last failed attempt so I'm still just here#doing whatever this is#maybe I should drive out to the coast#maybe staring at the ocean would fix me I've been away from it for too long#I mean it can't make me worse#I should wait until further into summer though so I don't have to drive back in the dark#everyone around here has trucks with those goddamn LED headlights and I've got a little sedan that's directly in their blast zone
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Every once in a while I dream of being able to build my own house, but specifically so it can be designed to be functional without electricity
#I’m talking fireplaces a wood stove ventilation grates at the top of rooms#i want there to be a pump well#and like terracota floor tiles bc I miss those#and a turret tower bc those are cool#our ac is put rn and there is no movement#in the airflow#do you know the new houses here don’t even have windows???#just glass panes put into the walls. they don’t open#that’s a death sentence if your a/c goes out#l’ve gone too many times in Florida summers without ac I can’t 😫😫😫
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#Good Omens season 2#Good Omens TV#I know everyone else already shifted into this mode like a month ago and by now already know the plot of the entire show beforehand probabl#but I've been stubbornly avoiding all spoilers and anyways I had to finish DS9 which I will be doing tonight#thereupon I will die 1000 deaths and resurrect to rewatch gomens s1 one more time next week#and then next Friday I will binge the entirety of s2 all at once like a whalefall feeding frenzy and then I will EXPLODE <3#so nice to have things to look forward to in this world. you've got to have goals you know.#good omens#Starky's Original Posts#GIVE IT UP FOR HOT REPTILE SUMMER!!!!!!!!!!!#man I've missed this and I didn't even realize it tbh...... like it turns out yes it is actually fun and engaging to watch new things#and be excited for what will happen in them#wah :')#[voices in the distance yelling at me to answer ppl's messages and do something productive/creative instead of just#wolfing down tv shows and fanfics and nothing else but luckily I am running away so so fast and they can't catch me]
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There’s another post going around about this, but tumblr won’t let me reblog it but...
When I read a story written by a human being, I’m not just reading it because I want to read a coffee shop AU with a specific plot description. I’m reading it because it’s making a connection to another human storyteller and seeing a piece of them carved into the words. Storytelling is a human act of sharing joy, angst, tension, resolution, satisfaction. It’s an act of love.
Writing and reading a story isn’t just an act of creation and consumption. I hate that commercialism and AI are reducing it to that sort of transaction. Like oh, you need words on this subject and that’s the end of it. Like what we really needed was just a vending machine we can push buttons on to get a fix, as if the human creating the story wasn’t a factor. That the author’s life experience and views and feelings haven’t infused the words with their own unique touches.
I’ve read hundreds of coffee shop AU’s over the years (and thousands of fics in general). I’ve seen many similar tropes reused across stories, and just like an AI would, I’ve learned things about writing them that I will always carry with me. But unlike an AI, a human author is not just the sum total of coffee shop AU’s we’ve consumed. Even if we used the same prompt, the same sets of tropes, the same characters. I will always choose the human-crafted story over the computer generated one.
Because again, I’m not just looking for a very specific fix via a series of words. I’m looking for a human connection through story.
Unlike an AI, I have BEEN to a coffee shop. I’ve had experiences in coffee shops. I’ve had funny little meet-cutes with people. I’ve accidentally spilled coffee on myself and knocked heads with someone as we both rushed to wipe it up. I know what it FEELS like. The machine doesn’t.
I’ve also read millions of things that aren’t fanfic, or coffee shop AU’s. I’ve experienced things OTHER than going to coffee shops and having meet-cutes. And I know what all those things feel like when processed through my personal human lens of experience, which is different from every other personal human lens of experience.
All the machine can do is spit out what it THINKS a human experience is, and I honestly don’t care about that at all. Fic is not a “product” to be “generated.” It’s an art form that connects us to other people who share the same love of a thing that we do.
People who, even when all writing the same characters in the same setting to the exact same prompt, will all add something or have a viewpoint about something or bring a completely different personality and life experience to the story that no one else on the planet could. That’s what I’m actually reading.
#ai shit#adventures in fanfic#i detest this commodification of art being accelerated by ai tech#as if art was nothing more than a consumer product#i want to engage with art made by people who were driven by a passion to make something and share it with us#not working to an algorithm to generate specific 'content' (and can we agree that reducing art to 'content' is part of the problem here)#and this whole concept of 'death of the author' that has been warped so far beyond what it actually means >.>#it just... makes me incredibly sad to see so many people arguing FOR the use of ai in the arts#like way to miss the whole entire point of what the arts even are#but this reminds me of the fic writer challenge i did one summer...#same prompt same set of tropes and every week a dozen completely different stories from a dozen different authors#because we all took our own unique spin on the subject because that's what PEOPLE do...#i just lament what will happen to that vast well of creativity and humanity that will be lost if everything just gets replaced#by a machine that just keeps spitting out the 'content' it believes the 'consumer' wants... it's just... depressing af
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