#but i did make this scrap edit a while ago!

[grxceful-ly]

happy last day of sabezra week!! it's been such a good one. biggest of thanks yous to the people behind @sabezraweek, you guys rock 🫶🏻

[shy-urban-hobbit]

Edwin flipped the page in yet another thick, obscure volume, the title near faded from the cover with age. Charles and Crystal had retired hours ago with the promise to pick up again in the morning; the human claiming a need for sleep (understandable, considering it was the early hours) and Charles had gone with her in the event of any more unpleasant flashbacks (a common occurrence since she'd recovered her memories), leaving Edwin to search for any possible leads alone. There had to be something relevant in this one! After the fuss he'd kicked up to the Night Nurse about acquiring these particular books for this case in the first place he absolutely could not go back to her admitting that for all of his bargaining (or 'tantrums' as she'd called it. Honestly, that woman could be so patronising at times) it had indeed been all for nothing in the end.

"Anything interesting?"

Edwin did not startle at the sound of his lovers voice behind him. He whipped his head around to see Thomas, arms behind his back and perfectly straight faced even as the shaking of his shoulders betrayed his amusement at having made the other jump.

"Thomas, when exactly did you get here?"

"Here being my room? And you got here about ten minutes ago."

Edwin blinked. No...he was at the office in London. Finally taking in his surroundings, his eyes landed on a familiar circular bed and neon sign.

Thomas moved closer, wrapping the other in a one armed hug, "If I can bring you here without you even noticing, I think that's a sign you need to take a break."

"That's not necessary. Ghosts don't feel physical exhaustion, as you well know by now."

"Who said anything about physical? You might not need to sleep, but you still need to give that big brain of yours a rest before you overlook something incredibly obvious and important."

"I can't right now. I assure you, I'm perfectly fine."

"Yeah? Ok then, tell me all the basic weaknesses of a shape shifter."

"Child's play."

Edwin was confident in his answer until he saw the fond smirk on his lover's face, "What is it?"

"The fact you're mixing up shape shifters and vampires."

"An easy mistake to make."

"Sweetie, you listed sunlight. Twice."

He had? "Hmmm....perhaps a brief respite would be beneficial at this point."

"Perhaps." Thomas laughed, "Your research will still be there in a couple of hours Bookworm, come cuddle with me for a while. I'm feeling generous so I'll even read to you."

Edwin got to his feet, opening his mouth to protest when Thomas plucked the book from his hands, "Ah, ah. Nothing work related though. That's cheating."

He gave the end of Edwin's nose a tap before, with a flick of his wrist, the thick volume was gone. In its place a first edition of The Hobbit, a scrap of paper poking out from the pages (a source of playful bickering between the two. For all that Thomas was capable of conjuring books, he could never be bothered to do the same with bookmarks, instead using whatever was to hand. Thomas argued that at least he didn't dog-ear the pages like some heathen).

Thomas reclined on the bed, giving the mattress next to him an inviting (expectant) pat. Edwin rolled his eyes before climbing on and curing into the others side, closing his eyes and drifting along with the feeling of his lovers fingers running through his hair to the sound of Bilbo Baggins engaging in a game of riddles.

[impossiblepackage]

What's one of your fav things that has happened to you in dwarf fortress?

One of my first games I played when I was actually getting a handle on things, years ago before the steam edition, I had a fort that was going pretty good. Right away I had started to build a big grand entry hall with a spiraling ramp entrance, not bothering with stairs, and was just going to dig out the main hall and a few rooms before looking into making some arms and armor so I could get some dwarves training. I didn't have many dwarves, but I had settled near a necromancer tower (which are much more common if you let the world gen run for 250 years, which used to be the default instead of the current 100 years) so i wanted to get prepared early. I had the starting seven when the necromancer came knocking. I managed to get almost every locked aware inside in time, and spent a couple months waiting for them to leave. I was able to dig out that main hall and a few rooms and get a random dwarf to start practicing making copper gear. When they finally did and I opened the gates again, I barely had time to chop a bit of wood and for a migrant wave to take me somewhere around 12 dorfs before the undead came back. This was a much smaller group of 6 or so experiments with decent gear. I kept the dwarves locked up, started looking for flux and iron to equip them properly. After a while I realized just how much I was depending on forage for food and booze, which was beginning to become a problem since most of a year passed without the experiments leaving.

At the time, I still didn't have much of an understanding of how flux worked or where to find it, so I had maybe a few scraps of steel and a load of iron when our food reserves started getting really low. I never considered looking for the caverns because that was still a no-go zone in my mind. So, I hammered out what steel i had into a few weapons and used iron for the rest, plus what iron armor I could slap together. Shortly before we ran completely out of food and booze, I said fuck it, had the civilian dwarves hide away in what was going to temporarily be a hospital, and stationed the military dwarves at the gate. The necromancer experiments had spread out in the tunnel a little bit, so I thought maybe I could just let one or two in at a time, but they were quicker than expected and my dwarves a bit too overzealous. Pro tip: when you want to fight, station the dwarves further back than you actually want them to fight, because they WILL just charge ahead.

An all out brawl broke out which was taking AGES for some reason. The fight spread out all over the hall, and one of the experiments showed up a bit late and peeled off to slaughter most of the civilian dwarves. Several of my military dwarves had died, but a couple of them had too. Eventually, I had nothing left but one military dwarf and two civilians behind a locked door in the hospital. That soldier was wounded but still up and about. The remaining experiments had started spreading throughout the rest of the fort and the mines, leaving just one on the opposite side of the great blood-soaked entry hall, with a wounded soldier near the hospital door surely about to bleed out on the ground. I took a chance and let a dwarf out to rescue her, hoping to get her in a hospital bed before the undead got in. Almost worked, too. Got her in, but that experiment caught the walking soldier on the wrong side of the door. The two civilians fuckin jumped into the fray and the three of them together were somehow enough to take it out and get back inside before more came, at the cost of the lives of one of the civilians, who had to haul the military dwarf to another hospital bed before dying themselves.

Which is about when I realized I didn't actually understand how dwarven medicine worked. I had no medical supplies at all, so all that was left to do was wait and hope she got better. Just two soldiers, locked in a room of corpses, hoping the enemy leaves of their own accord. Miraculously, she got up of their own accord, and after so long of waiting I said fuck it and decided to try and take em on one at a time. They got one or two of them this way, on account of them all being pretty injured as well, but the remaining three all showed up at once. They got one of them, they got our brave rescuer from before, and my last dwarf, one who had been one of my favorites from the start, the one we lost the last two civilians to rescue, fought valiantly to the bitter end, but ultimately fell.

then, hilariously, a migrant wave arrived and was immediately slaughtered in the open.

[rosemist50]

Okay look, I know I usually put the old version of the design first, so it's like reading it from then to now, but that means when I get a notification on the post, the old art is what shows up in the thumbnail, and it kinda throws me off, sooo I'm changing it. New art first.

Anyways first up is Tawnypelt!! She is one of the most redesigned cats, I have such a hard time getting a design I like for her. Sorta same story as in the previous post; I like her old design, but not enough for her as a protagonist, if that makes any sense? If she stayed as a side character then I think I'd be fine with the old design the way it was, but now that's she's a protagonist I wanted to change it. Then is the one and only Moonpaw!! :3 Her body design has stayed pretty much the same throughout design testing. Next is fixing up the new kits to follow the Super Edition's allegiances preview thing. I put Leafkit on the new one even though her design didn't change so that I wouldn't need to pull up two separate images in any drawings. Branchkit and her are now twinsies! And Grasskit is described as auburn?? Gave that a shot, most of her body design is taken from Branchkit's old one, I thought it was a better blend of their parents than Grasskit's old one. Then is Rapidkit, Floatkit, and Troutkit. Rapidkit and Floatkit pretty much swapped most of their design elements, and Troutkit got some spots and color changes. And thennn Russetfur!!! Wow! I did NOT like her old design, so here's a much better one.

Tawnypelt design extras under the cut

Y'all,, okay, so Tawnypelt's design gave me so much trouble omg.... You can see I started tweaking it in May, three months ago. All of these were Tawnypelt design concepts that I didn't like for one reason or another. I knew I wanted some yellow in there for her mother but that was kinda it. I know split face is popular with her, but with Moonpaw being split faced already I didn't want to make Tawnypelt also one. Too much white in the face was the problem with the first two, then not enough, then I took a break and came back at it with a full page of just throwing stuff at the wall (and a scrapped Branchkit idea hehe). I sorta wanted her to also have some brown, but I couldn't get it to look right so I scrapped it, then I tried a sort of lykoi style, which I thought looked cool but ultimately decided against, then got to the last two where I was trying alternating black and brown, and I liked how the first one on the end looked on paper, but when I put it in digitally there wasn't enough black so I ended up going for all black instead. And here we are now 😁 I very much hope that I like this design enough to keep it around for a while.

[purplelupins]

Lamb: behind the scenes

-Footnotes, deleted scenes and commentary-

Hello my dear reader. Below you will find many comments and addiction material from Lamb that just didn’t make it in or things I wanted to explain further. Thank you so much for being here!

•spoilers for Lamb ahead•

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

For transporting the cookies to the potluck, I originally had reader wait for John to help him as they had agreed in that version. It had a nice little tense moment between reader an Bev, with John coming to readers aid when Bev told her to leave it to her.

It was just another sweet scene between the two and reader and John had a private moment in the rectory where he thanked her genuinely but it was more than just the cookies he was thanking her for. It was for being a good person and for helping Millie.

Then they walked together and commented on very simple things almost like an old couple.

I scrapped it though because I realized that in the grand scheme of things, reader had known this man for all of what…three days? And she was spending too much time with him. It was just getting over-saturated with them being together and wasn’t realistic. Plus I liked making John just sort of pop up constantly because he was this foreign presence, which was just another way of showing how he was a wolf among the sheep. Reader was just an intuitive sheep who really wanted him to be like her. Turned out he was still just a wolf.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

This next scene I had in mind for a couple different times but couldn’t decide where…I was going to put it in place of the conversation reader and John had that first time in the rectory when she tells him she’s claustrophobic of the confessional. I scrapped it because it felt too heavy of a subject and I didn’t really like where it put reader and johns relationship after crafting it so carefully. I know hard conversations are very real and they happen when you don’t mean to, but I just decided against it. Still one of my favourite scenes tho so here it is!

“Have you read the other books of god, Father?” You asked.

Admittedly, the question surprised him.

“I have…years ago when I was young.”

“You should again…the Quran is…fascinating. Strict. There is no room for question or interpretation per se…almost like an instruction manual. I am…very alone here. Time is something I have a lot of. And while I still attend church…I find myself questioning. I believe in god. But I also believe that perhaps there is more to that belief than just the Bible.”

John shifted, “How so?”

“As if…the Bible was just a second edition of God’s message. The Torah was the first, then the Bible, then the Quran. Whether you believe it or not…it’s simply factual that the Quran came after the Bible, and it simply furthers what is already stated in the Bible…like an extended reading but do you know what truly makes me question the Bible, father?” You slowly rose your gaze to meet his, and you found him to be already staring at you intently. Rapt. You wondered if this was how it felt to deliver a sermon atop the pedestal.

“Tell me.” He answered instantly.

You swallowed, “It’s been rewritten and rewritten by men. Not even Christian men too…so much is missing…Did you know that there are parts that have been fully removed? It’s been translated and revised…did you ever play that game “telephone” as a child?” You asked.

He nodded.

“Well…as you know the message slowly gets distorted and changes even if you don’t mean for it to…it’s just human nature. One person doesn’t listen well and passes a message on as they see fit. That’s all it takes…one person and the message is lost. It doesn’t matter if every person told the distorted message after that is the most pious, modest and God loving human to walk the earth…they will still be worshiping the wrong thing and preaching something that wasn’t meant to be preached.” You could feel your heart beating hard in your chest. It hurt.

All your life, you had been seen as a town good girl. Sweet, submissive, giving, modest and joyful.

Never in John’s life would he have thought that you would be sitting before him with a profound and enlightened view of Gods holy message.

At his silence, you continued, “A church is still holy ground. And that is what a god fearing person needs to pray and connect. I believe in god, father. I believe in Jesus just as I believe in Abraham, and his sons, and Moses and Noah, and Muhammad and Jacob. I believe they were all doing gods works. But they were not god. Jesus was not god. He was just a messenger. This holy trinity…it’s just a complication of something that is meant to bring peace and guidance and fear. That is what god is. God was not a man who went home. God just…is. He is our guide.”

John blinked. At a loss for words for once in his life. Since he was 8 years old, he had obsessed over faith. Over his life, growing deeper and deeper into connection; taught by his own pastor and his parents then pursuing priesthood…it was simply a series of steps, one after another, he hadn’t even stopped to question if there was something else.

This entire time, John Pruitt had thought hinself a holy man…a man of god. But here you were with hands holier than his. Bathed in blessedness.

This gift given to him was not for him. It was for you. For him to give to you to preach to those who would listen.

“You came here thinking you were having difficulties with your faith, correct?” He asked.

You nodded.

“Well, young lady I think…I think you are in a very important place right now. You are questioning and examining and teaching yourself…You will find your way.”

“You don’t- you’re not…angry?” You asked.

He smiled, “Why would I be angry?”

“I just- I…well I just told you I’m not fully believing everything you stand for.”

“True. But like I said when you asked me-we are human. We question things, it’s actually one of Gods favourite things about us as humans is that we are always analyzing things. Looking for the right way. Looking to be guided. Looking for our way to heaven…or out of it I suppose there are satanists after all. But you yourself said that you love God and his messengers and that is much more than a lot of people can say.”

You nodded.

“I have faith in you that you will find your way.” He murmured.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

I made a little mistake and I decided to keep it in because it was so important and I couldn’t rewrite it. It was just too perfect and it didn’t change much. Basically I added a day for Easter- in the series, it goes Good Friday (the day where Millie runs out with Sarah) and then the next day is Saturday where Paul and the Scarboroughs and Bev are planning the vigil, and then that night is the vigil. Well I moved the vigil to Sunday NIGHT instead of Saturday because I needed that moment of reader realising that she’s being indoctrinated (for a lack of better words) and that she isn’t thinking straight. A true moment of religious fear. It really bugged me that I made that mistake but in the end it was really crucial to this story and so I kept it.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

For the second part I grappled with how I wanted Paul to be after the vigil. I kept Sarah’s death and sort of built off that…this is how I felt things might go down after that. I did almost approach this as more of a cult, so Paul was still idolized but I think realistically he realized what he did and so did everyone else so I think he would be a bit of an outcast. I think he would have a lot of guilt and would be a bit of a recluse. He removed his collar when Sarah died, and I think that was a sign of him giving up his place as a priest in that he couldn’t hold that sort of profession anymore. He betrayed God and he can’t preach something when he doesn’t wholly follow it. I think he realized how skewed his theology was.

He really thought he was helping but he ended up ruining the lives of so many.

I had Mildred kill herself because losing a child is devastating, and she was given a life she didn’t want. She was a woman of faith, and I think that even if she did stay with John, there was too much resentment there. In that final moment in Midnight Mass when they kiss, I think she forgives him because she doesn’t want to go to the grave with that on her conscious…but since I didn’t have that happen she had to survive knowing her daughter was dead and she would never see her again. Yes she loved John but love is conditional…he did something horrific and selfish and it cost her her daughter. And it’s not like she could just leave to start a new life on the mainland (okay maybe but it would be difficult) and so she did the only way out she could see. Death. In hopes that she might see her Sarah again.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

This next bit was originally going to be how the story segued into a more intimate relationship. Reader woke up after hiding in the rectory (before the attack) and he convinced her to sit with him and she basically cried as she told him she hated him and he let her then she fell asleep and he shifted her into his lap and they sort of wordlessly shifted into her sitting on him and then talking and then this scene, but it didn’t feel right. I actually wrote these stories separately but then they naturally merged into one so I had to go back in this part and edit a lot since their relationship became very difficult thanks to the build up….

John nosed at your hair, holding you close like his last piece of hope. You could feel him inhaling.

The two of you sat there just a hairs width away from eachother. John leaned his head up and kissed your forehead, then leaned his against yours. A small sense of piece filled you, but it was quickly replaced with surprised when you felt a pair of soft, dry lips caress yours fleetingly. You opened your eyes to see John with a sheepish and nervous look on his handsome face.

“What are you doing?” You murmured. It was barely a question.

“I don’t know.” He whispered back, but didn’t make any move to draw away from your space.

“You’re not a good person.” You said. You knew in your heart that it was true, but your words sounded hollow. You knew it wasn’t that simple.

I’m just here to help.

You could still remember those first words he had said when he showed up that random day. So fresh and invigorating.

You remembered how you had thought it a little heartbreaking that such a beautiful man had chosen to serve god and take those vows…now it made you almost laugh. You felt a little silly now recalling how you had confessed to him things that you would never have said to the Monsignor…that was when his name was Paul Hill and John Pruitt was healing in a hospital. Now…well now you were in the very man’s arms, weighing his soul with your gaze.

“I hoped I was. Now, I think I have to agree with you…a good person would have left that thing in that cave and told a single lie about an island’s beloved Monsignor’s passing…but I chose instead to lie over again and bribe and smuggle…and I see now. I see what happens when you think of helping gods natural order. Too little too late.” His voice rumbled.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

The following are just some lines of random dialogue that I liked but didn’t fit.

“Don’t you miss the feeling of sunshine? Warmth on your face?” You asked, staring out through a partially opened curtain at the winter sun.

“I used to…but I see sunshine every day now.” He smiled and looked over at you.

——————

{This one I chose to take out because the moment was very touching and I didn’t want to make it funny}

“What…what’s it like?” You asked, looking out at the water.

“It’s…it’s beautiful unlike anything I could describe. Clarity and vibrance in things that you see every day…the world hums and sings…smells and colours you never thought of…halos around lights that seem to breathe with you…”

You sat for a moment, “Sounds like having an astigmatism…I have one in my right eye.”

————————————

{this one was one of a few parts where I toyed with them talking about his name change.}

“God did extraordinary miracles through Paul, so that even handkerchiefs and aprons that had touched him were taken to the sick, and their illnesses were cured and the evil spirits left them.”

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

I had a lot of rough drafts for their intimacy scene. I tried a few different ways but I just never felt right. And I found that it was because it was using too much literal and blunt terms and descriptions. Their relationship was tender and fragile…so I made the depiction of them being together just as delicate. It was honestly my all time favourite intimacy scene that I’ve ever written so far.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

So…I am sorry about the ending. When I first started the story, I wanted it to have a happy ending. I had originally wanted her to leave him and try to run away, and he lets her go and is all depressed. But then he opens the door one night, and she’s standing there in the grass, all red eyed from crying and realizing that she needs him, and runs to him and they would live happily ever after. But t every time I tried to make it happy or that they ended up together, it just felt forced and unrealistic. My whole idea for this fic was for John to redeem himself and for reader to heal, but stay true to herself. And in the end, they couldn’t do that together. It would have been selfish for him to keep her, and it would have eventually ruined her. She would have ended up resenting him all over again because he would have kept her from living how she wanted to and seeing the world and being human and following God’s plan.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

That’s all! Thank you so much for reading and being here. Please ask questions if you have them!! This has been a wonderful experience to share with you. Thank you for enjoying Lamb.

-Nora

@littleredwritingcat @zaunite-leo @f4er1e-g1rl @purplemotif @vampyre-kin @hamishlinklaters @spacechupss @pansexualpamandabear @ebiemidnightlibrarian @erialuna @nilla-bear @vintageglassheart02 @ethanhoewke @dancingisdangerouss @cherrysugarx @daisychainsinknots @thesoundresoundsecho

[formula-fun]

hi there, let me walk you throught the last few days of my life

saw a list of history recommendations here on tumblr last Friday, saw the series if I had words there and thought "well let's give it a shot!"

started reading Friday night, got obsessed with it, couldn't stop, finished max's part Sunday, a little after the race.

got sad it ended and then VERY happy when I remember about the other part!!

started reading Sunday afternoon, got obsessed with it, couldn't stop, finished charles' part five minutes ago

All of this to day, I AM IN LOVE WITH YOUR WORK 😭😭😭

like WTH IS SOO GOOD

the construction, the order of the events, seeing everything fall into place after reading both parts, max learning to grow older and softer, charles understanding his feelings and letting himself have nice things, their mom's, the packs, the I love yous, oh my GOD 😭😭

broke my heart when I reached the end because I could keep read more and more and more of those two maybe forever??

definitely interest in a sequel or spin off or any little crumb showing just a peek of them again

again, amazing work, absolutely brilliant all around (and I was always laughing at your notes hahaha)

sending love !!

😭😭😭😭😭😭 thank youuuuuu i literally cannot tell you how much i love this, hhh. I DO NOT HAVE WORDS

this fic is truly my child, i put so much time and attention into it and i love the way it turned out so much <33 ive never allowed myself to just take my time on something and keep scrapping it over and over until it was exactly how i wanted it, but i'm so glad i did! it makes me really happy that other people appreciate the care that went into it and appreciate the way everything falls into place. i promise it was HEADACHE inducing at times to write two different stories about the same event but it was also really really fun

and thank you abt notes ahhahsahs i do NOT put as much effort into my notes. i usually write my notes at the last second after editing for like 3 hrs straight and just roll on vibes, so im glad you enjoy that <33

dfkjdfksd i'm running low on crumbs but you can have this!! it's from a version of the final chapter in which jos DID tell the press about the miscarriage

Max wakes him up with a kiss at the base of his neck, and then one on his mouth that lingers sweetly. His hands are hesitant on Charles’ waist, his touch light and skittish, which Charles always hates. Charles tells him so, and Max lets out a husky laugh.

“You want more?” he asks, his tone still hesitant even when his eyes are dancing. It makes Charles roll his own eyes, and then roll him; pin him down into the mattress by his wrists and bite at his jaw.

“I want you to touch me like you mean it,” he mutters into his skin.

Max’s wrists flex beneath his grip, muscles coiled and ready to fight. His mouth is curved when Charles kisses it, but he bites Charles’ lip anyway.

“Mean what?” Max whispers against his mouth when they part.

That I’m yours, Charles thinks, but he doesn’t say it. He can’t say it. He can’t really admit to something like that, yet; can’t allow himself to, even if he already knows it’s halfway true. He wants to mean it when he says it, and Max—Max hasn’t chosen him yet.

“That you want me,” Charles says instead. He brushes his nose against Max’s jawline; against his pulse point; follows the line of his throat down to the spot where his mark would go and lets his breath dance over it. Max’s chest goes stone still beneath his own.

Charles ducks forward and brushes a chaste kiss there, as softly as he can. Max shivers beneath him, his eyelids fluttering shut. His tendons shift under Charles’ palms as his hands clench into loose fists.

“Do you—”

In a blink they’re rolling over, Max pressing him down, one hand at the small of his back and the other beneath his knee. Max kisses him hard.

“Like I couldn’t,” Max hisses against his mouth when they part. “What kind of question is that?”

Charles just quirks an eyebrow. “Show me,” he says simply.

For a while, he’s able to forget about it all.

Of course it only lasts as long for it takes the two of them to shower, get dressed and part ways; as soon as he arrives in the paddock he’s swarmed. It’s not the fans—they’re not allowed back here today—or even that people are yelling questions. People know not to try; not when paddock passes can get revoked and fines can be given.

They don’t do anything so stupid, but it doesn’t matter. The scrutiny is just as bad; two dozen cameras following his every move as if waiting for him to do something.

He breathes a sigh of relief as he ducks into the Ferrari hospitality. Andrea slips in after him, and he’s kind enough not to say anything about the way Charles is morosely stuffing biscuits from the coffee bar into his mouth.

“I called your pack off,” he tells Charles, making himself an espresso. He almost manages to look disinterested while he does it.

Charles just raises his eyebrows. “Did you?”

“Well, Pierre did. They didn’t really listen to me.” He dumps two sugars into his coffee, stirring a little aggressively, and then rolls his eyes at the look Charles is giving him. “Oh, leave me alone. It’s been a stressful morning. How are you doing?”

Charles shrugs. “We knew this was going to happen,” he points out.

“Yeah, I know. That wasn’t really my question.”

“I’m,” Charles starts, then looks down at his biscuit; the crescent bite taken out of it. “It’s fine. I don’t think it has fully hit me yet.”

Andrea purses his lips. He nods. “Fred said they’re not allowed to ask any questions about it in the presser. You’re with Pierre, Alex, Oscar and George, so even if someone tries something, you won’t be alone. It was the best we could do.”

“Max?” Charles asks, in spite of himself.

Andrea’s lips somehow purse even harder. “The FIA was strongly advised to give him a week off.”

“But not me.”

“You wouldn’t want a week off.”

Charles hums. That’s true.

“Besides,” Andrea adds in an undertone, “I know you will want to set an example that this is not to be discussed in the paddock. It’s not Fred’s decision, obviously, but…”

“But you don’t trust Max to be able to do the same,” Charles finishes for him.

“I trust him,” Andrea argues. “I trust him to say what we’re all thinking, which is that this is stupid and everyone should fuck off. I just also know that will only make things worse.”

Charles tilts his head, conceding the point. He breaks a crumb off his biscuit; pushes it past his lips.

“Is he alright?” Andrea asks after a beat, his voice quiet. “After last night?”

Andrea had been the one to check on them when they hadn’t reemerged from the bedroom suite, only to find them curled up on the bed, Max having finally passed out. Charles had kissed his forehead before slipping out to join the media strategy session; had pulled the duvet over him as he went. He’d called room service after everyone had finally left, coaxing Max into eating comfort food in bed with him, some meaningless travel show playing in the background, giving Max’s red-rimmed eyes somewhere to drift when they refused to meet Charles’ own.

“He’s fine,” Charles mutters, then scrubs at his hair. “Or he will be fine. I don’t know. He has this stupid idea that he has to be the strong one all the time. He doesn’t feel like he should need me when I am the one who everyone is talking about, and when he thinks it is all his fault.”

“Why does he think that?” Andrea asks.

“Because Jos was the only one who could have told them. Nobody else knew. And Max was the one who told Jos.”

Andrea chews that over, sipping his coffee.

“I don’t know why it matters,” Charles adds. “It is out now. It doesn’t matter how it got out.”

“You could always sue Jos,” Andrea muses. “Defamation or whatever.”

“It’s not worth it.”

“Isn’t it?”

Charles shrugs. Maybe it would give him some sense of satisfaction; probably not. “It would just give the media more to talk about,” he says. “It would make Max feel worse. I would gain nothing. It was going to come out eventually anyway,” he adds. “It was always a matter of time, wasn’t it?”

Andrea grimaces. “It’s hard to say,” he admits, “but these things tend to not stay secrets for long.”

[budgetbuildsystem]

Small rant about hazbin hotel. Please note this is based on information I've been told and my own opinion.

SPOILERS

The pilot released years ago was a great idea, showed off beautiful amature work, and felt like it was made by a person who cared about what they made.

New hazbin started out chaotic and hard to follow, so many showtune type songs and barely followed the original idea at all. Every single voice was recast and it makes me a bit sad. It feels like a company attempted to take that original idea and make it more palatable. Alistor has a completely different vibe, and in the end just... RAN AWAY?? Got beat in less than a minute and ran after they spent the season building up to be a terrifying being? And then there's the actual production team. Animators received less than minimum wage for this show. And treated poorly. Had this show never been sold off to a different company I would have loved to see the original story idea. To wholeheartedly support this show. But instead it became a corporate cash grab to take over a fun different idea because they thought they could do it better.

Also why were they sing discussing the issue of getting into heaven? Why sing about Vag being an angel? I get wanting to incorporate songs but that really just felt awkward to sing through?

I truly wish I could have seen the original project to the end because this one had a lot of plot holes, swapped out a lot of good voice actors, too many showtunes that really weren't placed well, and paid the employees like crap.

Idk I just really regret watching it knowing that the original idea was mostly scrapped and the employees barely see any money coming from it.

EDIT:

Thank you to the person in the comments talking with me. I want to adjust some statements.

So first of all, Alastor. I love his character design and it was explained to me just how his power and staff works, so I can better understand why he lost that battle.

Secondly, the pay thing was a lie. I heard this very early in production from someone who I trust with information and didn't really question it. So thanks for informing me.

And lastly, music does very much hig differently for everyone. An example I can think of is Iron Man by black sabbath is calming to me while it may be a scary/hype song for others. Personally the songs in hazbin didn't really hit right but a few really did well.

Thank you for your patience and never lose that passion @diamondkat 💚💚💚

[tellthemeerkatsitsfine]

Sorry to give more attention to something that sucks, but I figure I'm not the only one who'd rather know than not know about a comedian I like in a case like this - remember last year, when Richard Ayoade gave that supportive quote on the cover of Graham Linehan's book? And it was disappointing, I figured that even if it's what I assume happens regularly with books like this, where they'll just get whatever famous friends they have to give some positive quote for the cover, even if those friends haven't read the book - even if it was that, that still sucks on Richard Ayoade's part, if he signed off on that for a book like this. But hey, maybe he just doesn't follow the news of which old colleagues of his have lost their minds on social media, maybe he didn't think that much about it, maybe he didn't even know what the book was about, maybe he didn't even write that quote himself. Still sucks, but doesn't necessarily mean all that much.

I fortunately wasn't a sufficiently invested fan of Richard Ayoade to be hugely upset about it. I mean, I wasn't happy. I find him very funny on panel shows and I think Garth Marenghi's Darkplace was a masterpiece. I am, however, sort of pleased that the fact that Richard Ayoade sucks now makes it more acceptable for me to say I've always found The IT Crowd overrated. Also, while he can be very very funny when he's good, his persona does get grating after a while (especially given that... look, if he's going to express support for a man who's so against people changing their outer markers to affect how they're perceived, it's worth noting that it's not his real voice). It annoys me that the running joke on Catsdown is how he's so good at it because he's such a nerd, and they keep doing that joke even though he does badly in all the games. He's not really that smart, he just puts on glasses and a nasal voice and identifies as a nerd. He often doesn't even seem like his heart is really in the persona, I think he just played one nerd in 2006 and then got typecast and stuck doing it forever. Garth Marenghi was still a masterpiece though.

Anyway, I've just been pointed to an episode of Gyles Brandreth's podcast from a few weeks ago, where Richard Ayoade featured as a guest and discussed Linehan. I listened to the relevant passage and can confirm that he did know what he was talking about when he gave that quote for the book, he talks about how Graham Linehan has been doing good work and treated unfairly, and has been accused of transphobia but really it's about women's rights. Thought I'd share that for the information of anyone who likes Richard Ayoade and, like me, would rather know that not know if a comedian we like is saying stuff like that. Sorry again for giving it more attention. I briefly considered posting the clip, but I don't think I need to spread the actual audio around - if you, like me, like to hear things from the actual source rather than relying on out-of-context secondhand accounts, you can hear it yourself on the Ayoade episode of the Rosebud podcast. But I don't really recommend doing that.

I'd love to say I'm not too upset by the Ayoade news because I don't do that kind of parasocial putting celebrities on pedestals, to the point where I'd be upset about them turning out to be bad. But that's not true, there are plenty of comedians to whom I have some scraps of faith in humanity tied, and those rare scraps would disappear if my favourite comedians came out in support of Graham Linehan. Richard Ayoade's just not one of them. It was Matthew Holness who made Garth Marenghi so great anyway. And he did a far better job in one scene than Richard Ayoade did in four seasons, of playing a nerd in an 00s sitcom that was created by a guy who's now an awful transphobe. Even in a niche as small as that, Richard Ayoade doesn't win.

In order to make this post not 100% about terrible people being terrible, I'm going to take this somewhat tenuous excuse to talk about Richard Ayoade's best friend from Cambridge, who is far better than Richard. A couple of years ago, I went to make one of my little Bugle compilations, it got out of hand as I kept adding stuff to it, and I accidentally made a feature film. I entitled it A Groundhog Day of Hatred, as it chronicled the saga of John Oliver vs. Sarah Palin, every time their careers regrettably crossed paths. In September 2023, I updated that film with a few further bits, and released a second edition, which runs at 78 minutes. It's too many minutes.

To accompany the second edition, I thought it would be funny to create a movie poster. I got one quote from the excellent @lastweeksshirttonight, but thought it needed another quote, as all good promotional images are accompanied by quotes of famous people talking up the work. I realized that actually, John Oliver's old friend/Footlights teammate had recently given one of those promotional quotes that, by coincidence, would work just as well to describe my movie as it did to describe the work that that quote was originally used to promote. In fact, it would work even better. Because the story of John Oliver trying to cover Sarah Palin's political career really is the tale of a hero's harrowing journey, unlike Linehan's shit book.

So basically, if you find Richard Ayoade's political views disappointing, you can just look at that quote he gave Graham Linehan's book, and imagine he was instead describing this:

[dayurno]

hiii dayurno I’m a big fan !! In general but also of the name of the game which is what this ask is abt

Somewhat of a directors cut question bc the kevjean brain worms are eating me from the inside out - do u think there’s a version of the name of the game where Kevin turns away from Andrew and Neil and ends up with Jean - although I guess I don’t mean that kevjean need to end up romantic rather than simply the most important relationship in each others lives

Although I guess a broader question is if there’s a version where Kevin turns his back on Andrew and Neil and if so what happens then

its always touching (but crazy!) when people tell me they like tnotg because looking back on it its been 3 years and theres a lot of things about it i dislike 🫡 mostly writing choices and typos and whatnot, but its very sweet to me that people still care about it and are willing to look past those….. tch! i am nonetheless all too aware of the flaws in it but i’ll edit it one day. eventually. 4 sure

as for your question hmmm lets see! if you’re asking if there’s an universe where kevin rejects andreil — i think so! i think if kevin hadn’t slept with river, hadn’t moved to charleston, hadn’t befriended robin at the time he did, he probably wouldn’t have gotten to the yes he gives them in chapter 6. it wouldn’t necessarily be a finite forever no, but it’d definitely be a very uncertain Maybe andrew wouldn’t have wanted to work with it. at that point they would’ve stopped pursuing him unless neil thought he could convince kevin, but i’m not sure andrew would’ve been on board with that

now an universe where he ends up with jean….🤔💭 when i wrote tnotg there was little to no information (or really content) about jean and most of the kevjean friendship was based off of guesses and headcanons. this is i think made obvious by the fact that jean is older than kevin in it and was already a year into his contract with the stingrays when kevin signed with them. he wasn’t the one to suggest they move in together, but he offered kevin a place to stay while he looked for apartments, which led to the conclusion of kevin asking if he wants to be roommates. part of it was kevin scared of living alone, but the other part was simply because kevin wanted to be closer to jean again, and he thought close proximity could mend the parts of their relationship he thought were still off

which is all to say: yes! there can be a world where kandreil don’t get together and kevjean do :) my original plan 3 years ago was to involve jean with their captain in an out of wedlock affair (3 cheers for yonah’s shitty fiance), but it was scrapped pretty early in the writing process. i still think jean and yonah could have casually dated or hooked up on the side, and eventually river would have figured it out and told kevin, which would make him look at jean. Differently. i think. at the point of kevin’s first season he’s not really thinking about jean as an adult so much as he’s thinking about the memory of him as a teenager, so it’d be a bit of a shock to hear jean is fooling around with a teammate, which would put associations in his head he would Not Like To Deal With

the thing is that i don’t know if tnotg jean was in love with kevin the way tsc jean was. i think it was definitely There on the back of his mind, but i’m not sure if that version of him would have acknowledged his feelings, and it’s likely he’d have suppressed them much more than he did in tsc. but, by the time the tnotg timeline starts, jean is in a much better and calmer place, and i think he would eventually reevaluate those memories if kevin showed any sign of interest in him. and then it’d be free real estate

[quivm]

— Together till we're not.

Isagi x gn reader angst content!! minors can interact. no spoilers. no specific time settings (*ᴗ͈ˬᴗ͈)ꕤ*.ﾟ

wc: 0.9k

genre + content warnings:

angst, sfw, breaking up, hospital, mention of injury regarding stairs, bad bf

notes!! hello quinn here sorry for not posting in a while! i made a medium ish post as a sorry almost 1k. i maybe want to do a part 2 at some time for this bc i love angst. this beta read/edited my the amazing @misiiio_x on ao3 ( check her out her work is amazing ). repost are appreciated ty <3 (๑•ᴗ•๑)♡

The bleakness of the apartment swallowed you up.

The walls hung with distant memories and past emotions crying for you to reach out again, to him. The door crashed open, a minute reaction was all that came to you.

“You’re late again.” The words could barely cross the barrier of your lips. You were hesitant to say something. Afraid for the response, afraid for the fight, maybe even afraid of Isagi himself. What this relationship had become, what he’d become.

“You know I’ve been at practice.”

The cheers coming from the TV almost blocked the annoyance that radiated from his voice. His tone was business formal as usual, one couldn’t even think you were anything more than acquaintances.

“I know but why are you back at 10pm…practice ends at 6?” The words jumbled in your mouth, tears pooling and threatening to spill as they always do.

Both of you knew the answer to the question, the very question which continued to wreck your thoughts. The question not an ounce of reassurance could overcome, the goliath that wouldn’t fall in your relationship, the very plague filling your head with delusions. The trophies lining the wall made sure of that.

For the first time in this bleak night you faced the man you came to love all those moons ago. Your very own starboy, all grown up. Different but the same, yours but just quite out of reach. Broken, choked sobbing was all that came out at sight of his defiant self in front of you. Steadying yourself you mumbled, “Am I even enough for you?”

Finally, at your words his stoic facade fell away.

“What?”

Dumbfoundness was all Isagi could muster. The porcelain walls around your relationship finally seemed to splinter under all the pressure, the truth waiting to burst through.

“Am I enough, Starboy?”

Starboy, the nickname Isagi got all those many moons ago, originally represented your love for him and his dream and your love for each other. It was meant to show his potential to go the same very stars up in the night sky, to help him believe it. However, now it was a remnant of the past, a forgotten relic of another time. Some time ago the nickname was scrapped because of a fight that occurred because of the same reason as this, you found it nothing but ironic.

His quiet demeanour caught you off guard, so you asked again.

“Am I truly enough for you?”

Were you this repulsive to him? Did he want to see you fall this low, the absurdity of it all made you scoff while fat tears slid down your cheeks.

As desperately as you wanted the answer to be yes, that you were enough and he loved you, no matter how much you needed it, you both knew the reply. The silence that came next knocked the wind out of you. This meticulous world you built collapsed around you, no catharsis, just an endless stream of grief and betrayal flooded in.

“I KNEW IT YOU SHITTY BASTARD!”

Your screams echoed against the walls, the same apartment that was supposed to be the first stepping block in your relationship. The sight for some time had started to make you feel sick, it reminded you of promises he had never tried to fulfil for you. You didn’t know what to do, whether to cry and scream or fall in a heap on the floor, rip everything in sight apart?

Where did everything go wrong you wondered, what had you done that made you deserve this, what karma was this fulfilling. In blue lock Isagi unlocked his ego, his insatiable hunger for football– for winning. But of course, why on earth would that ring alarm bells for a dumb girl who was completely infatuated and lovestruck? Isagi was your world, his dream was equally yours. You’d let go of so much, the long practices, the missed dinners, the heated arguments over football, but no they weren't the worst. That wasn’t what broke you.

October 21, you fell down the stairs, the date of one of Isagi’s team matches and landed up in the hospital. The first thing you woke up to was not your attentive and loving boyfriend who you would have dropped everything for. But, Isagi captivated by the TV, almost as pale as the walls with anxiety, but not because of you in the hospital gown bandaged up but because of the fact his team was losing.

“Why today?” You vividly remember him saying.

Deep down you knew he was actually angry with you for getting hurt and taking him away from the game, and for a split second while bandaged up in a hospital bed you wanted to feel guilty for causing a blip in his winning streak for this season. You never forgot those two words; they tore your soul apart, and every day after your love for Isagi spilled out with nowhere to go.

Eventually, there just wasn’t any left.

It was apparent that football was Isagi's love in life and you would only be a fool to try and measure up to it.

[morningstargirl666]

I just finished reading through The Big Bad Wolf and have loved it. I can’t wait for more!! Any updates or news?

Hi! So happy to hear you loved it! ❤️✨

I'm currently in the process of editing/rewriting TBBW right now! I've also outlined chapter 36 and started writing some of the dialogue, but I'm hesitant to start writing it in its entirety because I feel like I'm going to end up changing a lot of TBBW and want it all up to date before I fully commit my attention to the next chapter. I'm not changing anything plot-line wise, but I am making tweaks to the lore, character development, etc. It's still the same story, but now that the first 35 chapters are written, I find I'm going back and adding bits that you'd normally see in 'filler' episodes. Anything and everything that develops characters, relationships or lore - or even just there simply because I find it fun and enjoyable. I keep reminding myself that writing these first 35 chapters was me stuffing sand into buckets and now, with time to edit, I can finally make the sandcastles: carve turrets and staircases, mount flags and add seashells, adding every scrap of detail that will ultimately make this story come alive.

For example, chapter 5 on its own, has 6.5K of entirely NEW unseen content added to it so far (it's not posted yet, nor are any other edits for TBBW, so don't get too excited). And that's not counting the scene between Sam and Kiera on the phone, which has been re-written completely for the most part. There is also at least one more new scene I still want to write. If the chapter gets too long, it might mean splitting it in two and re-organising the chapters again, like I did for chapter 11 and 12 a while ago when I edited them.

Chapter 5, I hope, is an outlier and most chapters won't have as much done to them. Chapter 1 is edited and finished, yet its mostly the same except for grammar corrections. Though Chapter 2 has a deeper insight into Klaus' mindset - particularly his pure dislike for doppelgangers - purely because it's fun for me, as well as highlighting the development of his character between The Little Wolf and the start of TBBW. There's also going to be an extra canon forwood scene at the end of that chapter, as I want to develop them more, in preparation for when I destroy the relationship in the future chapters after 35. But who nows - all the chapters centered around the Mikaelson Ball I'm eyeing hungrily, my mind whizzing with a few ideas on how I might expand on them a little bit. I also want to focus more on the hybrids, which until now I've kinda ignored.

I know it may be a little disappointing, to hear the next chapter update is a long way off yet. But I don't want to rush this. I want to savour it, every single second. And who knows, by the time you get chapter 36, you won't just be getting a 20k chapter - you'll be getting a 50k bonus update of brand new content as well, sprinkled throughout the first 35 chapters. The word count is going to be over 400k by the time I update the next chapter, probably closer to 450k, I'm almost sure of it.

I can't promise when the next chapter will arrive, but I can promise this:

It will be worth the wait.

[nat-seal-well]

Wip Wednesday!

I was tagged yesterday by @aztarion

Tagging: @agentnatesewell @evilbunnyking @nsewell @serenpedac @serial-chillr and anyone else who wants to share <3

This fic is done, but I have to edit it when I get home from work today. In the meantime, have some fluff as Elena makes Ava some hot chocolate (against her will)

Unable to find a way to escape—not that she would, even if she did; Ava knows this about herself even if she does not want to fully admit it, not yet—she sinks down into a chair at the table. At the counter, Elena busies herself with filling the kettle and setting it on a stove burner. She’s quiet as she keeps busy, focused, and Ava finds herself drinking in the way her brows furrow as she digs through a cupboard for the right container.

“To the left,” she says. “It’s kept with the tea. Nat reorganized the kitchen last week.”

Her interjection is worth it. Elena smiles at her, warm like a summer day, and tells her, “Thanks. See, you don’t want me to go back to bed, after all.”

And Ava doesn’t. Even if she knows she should. The Detective is a balm, something soothing and comforting. When she was human, so long ago, her family kept cats. They chased the rodents away, and Ava’s siblings always liked to sneak them scraps from their plates whenever their father wasn’t looking. More than once, she had woken on a cold morning to find a small, furry bundle pressed up against her underneath the blankets, purring with content ferocity. It always brought her peace.

Elena feels like that: soft and steady, constant.

There’s something calming about watching her work. She sets two mugs down on the counter, and two spoons, and scoops entirely too much powdered drink mix into both. While the kettle rumbles steadily, Ava is entranced by the way Elena’s fingers move as she unwraps two little chocolate candies and drops them into their mugs.

Ava won’t be able to handle more than a few swallows. She knows that for certain; she can smell the stuff from all the way over where she’s sitting. For some reason, though, she finds that she doesn’t mind.

[rosaren2498]

Warnings: Angst, blood, torture in the name of science (like the Augustine Society from The Vampire Diaries), implied past rape (it also almost happens but is interrupted before it can go that far), past captivity/imprisonment, reader wishes for death, organ removal

Please be careful and let me know if I missed anything!!! I want to tag the warnings properly but I never know what might trigger someone.

Also, I usually write in Fem 3rd Person and then edit it to be 2nd Person so it's more gender neutral so please inform me if I missed anything during my editing process, I do this on mobile.

Nightmare or Memory

It was cold.

So cold that you had long stopped shivering. So cold that you had accepted long ago that you might never know warmth again.

It was cold, and you wished you could say it was dark, but the lights shining in your eyes never went away; never dimmed, darkened, nor turned off. At least not while you were conscious.

You minutely flinched at the sound of metal scrapping on metal; you knew by now what that sound meant. You caught a flash of metal out the corner of your left eye, the scalpel reflecting the bright white fluorescent lighting.

"How are we doing today?"

You bared your teeth even as you felt the warm press of the blade against the naked skin of your chest. It had used to be cold to the touch, but now it was warmer than you. "Go to hell," you hissed.

His laughter seemed to echo around you; it was almost as if he'd laughed directly into your ears. It was dark, twisted, almost aggravated. The way the blade dug into your skin reflected it; cruel and aggressive, not as precise as usual.

Your breath hitched at the sharp bloom of pain. You think you'd be used to it by now, after all this time, but the first kiss of the blade never failed to steal your breath. You bit back cries, screams, and pleas for surcease that you knew would fall on deaf ears and do nothing, save for make him smug. However, you could not withhold your tears. As you squeezed your eyes shut and prayed for your life to finally end, tears slipped from the corners of your eyes, running into your hair.

The scalpel was eventually exchanged for something to keep the y-shaped cut -now on your chest and bleeding- open and you choked on a sob as it was forced open further. Seconds later, the first scream tore from your throat as his hands rooted around inside you.

"Ah, here we are."

You choked again as a hand grabbed one of your lungs and began pulling, the scream that was building in your throat abruptly cutting off when the lung ripped free. You tasted copper and you couldn't breathe; your vision was rapidly darkening.

"Oh, come now, don't pass out on me just yet." The voice was distant, cold and disappointed. It was also the only warning you got before blinding pain lit up your every nerve-ending and you let out an unearthly scream that seemed to echo in the room. "There you go."

You gasped desperately for breath as the pain slowly began to subside, and you were almost too distracted to realize where his hands were now; almost. You stiffened at the press of fingers on your thighs, another choked sob slipping out. Your lung had already grown back and you took a deep breath to speak.

"Please. Please kill me," you begged.

He laughed cruelly, forcing your thighs further apart. "Why would I do that? You're so beautiful like this. Chest open, blood and tears all over, spread open for me..." His voice had taken on an almost desperate edge and you shuddered in revulsion.

You closed your eyes again as your breathing sped up. 'Please don't,' you thought. 'Please make it stop.' You gagged when something blunt and thick pressed against you, then everything went still. It was an unnatural stillness, accompanied by a preternatural silence interrupted only by your quick breathing, until someone suddenly spoke.

"Enough."

Your eyes snapped open at the deep voice that you did not recognize. The ceiling had been eclipsed by dark storm clouds that swallowed the bright fluorescent lights. It plunged the room into shadows, interspersed with flashes of lightning. The doctor that had been positioned between your legs was gone, as were all his tools, including the one keeping the cut on your chest open. Instead, there was a dark figure standing to the right of the table you were strapped to. You flinched when he moved, but he only unfastened the buckles of your restraints.

You eyed him warily, slowly sitting up when your hands were free; your wrists were bruised and bloody from your thrashing. Your thighs twitched with the urge to snap shut when his fingers brushed your ankle while he undid the restraints there too; as soon as you were free, you were curling up in an attempt to hide yourself. You weren't sure whether to thank him, or ask who he was. Your mouth opened, but it quickly shut with an audible click of teeth when he removed his coat and held it out to you. You hesitated only a moment, terrified he would snatch it back the moment you reached for it, before taking it and slipping it over your naked body.

"Thank you."

Your voice was quiet, rough and hoarse from your screams. You adjusted the coat to be tighter around you and were abruptly stunned by the scent that smacked you in the face. It was rich, ozone and thunderstorms, plus something you couldn't quite identify, though your mind whispered stars, as if they had a scent; it settled something inside you.

"Are you alright?"

His voice was as quiet as yours had been and you shuddered at how deep it was, curling further into his coat. You could still feel your own blood on your chest, could feel it sticking as it dried; you hoped none of it ended up on his coat.

"It's not the first time this has happened." Your eyes fell to the ground, your voice taking on a bitter tone. "It won't be the last." With your gaze on the ground, you missed the twitch and twist in his expression.

"This was not an ordinary nightmare."

It was not a question, but you shook your head and answered anyways. "Not a nightmare; a memory."

"How long has this plagued you?"

You looked up at him now, a frown marring your features. You felt your defensiveness rise up, but what you'd been about to say died in your throat when you met his eyes. Twin stars, burning, endlessly burning, stared out at you; you found yourself answering his question without thought and with complete honesty.

"130 years, give or take. 'Course, that's what happens when you spend well over a century held captive by a secret society hellbent on discovering your secret to immortality so that they may replicate it to 'better the world.' "

His expression darkened once more, but you did not find yourself afraid of him, even as the very shadows seemed to stretch out from him; something told you he wasn't angry with you.

"Who are you?" The words did not come out as demanding as you had meant them too, instead coming out more curious than anything. Though that was, perhaps, for the best. Just because he wasn't angry with you doesn't mean he couldn't be.

He eyed you as if debating whether or not he should answer your question. You shifted in your spot, a little uncomfortable with his intense gaze on you, as you waited; you could be patient, but the silence stretched on. Just as you were beginning to think he simply wouldn't answer, he spoke.

"I am Dream of the Endless, King of Dreams and Nightmares."

You stiffened once more, your grip on his cost tightening. An Endless. He was an Endless. "You... Fuck, you're an Endless. And not just any Endless. No, you just so happen to be the second most powerful Endless, and the King of Dreams and Nightmares. Wonderful."

Dream seemed startled by your knowledge of him. He stepped closer to you, his eyes narrowing. "You know of me?"

You snorted at the understatement, unable to help it. "Know of you? Just about everyone in the Supernatural Community knows of you, and your family, Lord Dream. Not everyone believes, of course, but I suppose you could call me a... special case. I've dealt with your family before. Plus, I believe you and I have a mutual friend: Hob Gadling."

Dream frowned. "What do you mean you've dealt with my family before? How do you know Hob?"

You shifted in place, tightening his coat around you once more. "Easy question first. I met Hob about 350 years ago, at that tavern that has since closed down. We spent most of the night drinking and talking. Actually, he spent the night talking about you, though he clearly had no idea who you were." You don't even try to hide fond smile on your face. "I knew right away that he wasn't normal, but it took him about 50 years to realize I wasn't human." You snorted, then startled when you realized there was the barest hint of a smile on his face. The tiny smile made his entire face seem to shift, becoming more open and inviting; it stole your breath.

"And how do you know of my family?"

The smile was wiped from your face as you abruptly tensed. You gave a heavy sigh, but were determined to be honest. "I've not met them all. I often speak with your older sister, Teleute, just about every time I see her. But I was originally introduced to your family when..." You trailed off, hesitating as one of your hands absentmindedly traced at your chest where you had been cut open. "Let's just say, I became intimately familiar with your younger sister's realm while I was held captive; I still keep in contact with her sometimes, though her twin is no longer welcome in my presence."

He raised an eyebrow at your vagueness. "You have something against Desire. What?"

You grit your teeth in remembrance. "That is extremely personal and I'd rather not discuss it. Let's just say I was foolish once and they took advantage, hm?" You can still remember their laughter, the look in their golden eyes when you had confronted them 130 years ago... No, you could not tell Dream that Desire was the reason you had been imprisoned, even if it had not been entirely intentional on their part; you still weren't convinced that it hadn't been.

His expression twisted, clearly irritated with the lack of a concrete answer, but, surprisingly, he did not push; perhaps he could tell how you would shatter if he did? He gazed at you for a silent moment before he spoke once more. "This nightmare won't trouble you any longer."

You blinked a few times, startled. You opened your mouth, planning on saying something, anything. Perhaps planning to ask if you heard him correctly, or maybe to ask him why he would bother, but his next words seemed to echo around the room and vibrate in your very bones.

"This dream is over."

---

You jerked awake in bed, sitting up and panting heavily. Your hand flew up to your chest, tracing the y-shaped scar that had rested there for over 200 years now; as your heartrate decreased, you took stock of the rest of yourself. Your hair was a tangled mess and you ran your fingers through it in a futile attempt to tame it. Your room was dark, though that was more due to your blackout curtains than it being late; the light peaking out underneath them and the clock on your bedside table told you that it was almost 1 o'clock in the afternoon. Hob would be expecting you at the New Inn soon.

You leveraged yourself out of bed, freezing the moment you looked down at yourself. You were still wearing your typical wine-colored tank top and black shorts that you always wore to bed, but over top them was a long black coat; the inner-lining was made of a veritable night sky. The end of your nightmare came back to you and you had to practice slow breaths so as not to hyperventilate; well, you had quite the story for Hob when you saw him at work... and Teleute the next time they saw each other too. Although... how were you supposed to return his coat?

[17redeye]

Tabasco Pt. 3 A post-fall #Hannibal drabble

"I thought we were past trying to hurt one another." Hannibal announced, looking put out as he pulled the bottle of Tabasco from the paper grocery bag Will had just set on the counter.

Will tried for levity as he petted the dogs that crowded around his legs. "Listen, I gave up Jimmy Dean for you. The least you could do is let me have my Tabasco." 

"Considering this is the first you've ever spoken of Mr. Dean, how important could he really be to you, Will?" was Hannibal's bitterly spoken response.

Will felt the potential for this to spiral out of his control, and worse yet, they were in the kitchen. Will wouldn't go so far as to say he had PTSD, but he could admit that being in kitchens made him feel skittish—kitchens that also held Hannibal even more so.

Hannibal told him he did have PTSD, but Will had learned to tune out his psychoanalysis a long time ago.

Eyes trained on Hannibal's hands and thinking fast, Will decided that opening up emotionally was preferable to being opened up physically.

"I worked there, okay? When I was still in high school," Will gritted out, loathe to reveal any more of his childhood than necessary to a psychiatrist, particularly the one he lived with.

Compassion for Will did not stop Hannibal from analyzing him incessantly, and even when he wasn't foisting his analysis of Will upon him, he easily read it on his face.

Hannibal, predictably and without any shame of that predictability, latched onto this scrap that Will offered up.

With a notably lighter tone, he asked, "You made hot sauce?" while contemplating the boxed glass bottle he still held in his hand.

Will did his best to mentally fortify himself: “Yes, my dad picked up steady work at the port of Iberia, and we stayed close to Avery Island for two years.”

Hannibal was watching Will now, absorbing the information and editing his mental picture of the young man he’d been, while Will did his best to avoid his gaze and nonchalantly pet the dogs.

“Is this what your past tastes like Will?” Hannibal asks with the barest hint of a smile.

Will weighed his options; he's reluctant to reveal anything else, but dodging the questions might lead to this fight reoccurring. Ultimately, he'd like to get this over with, keep his Tabasco, and maybe Hannibal will not use it to annoy him too much.

“Those two years in Louisiana were the best I’d ever had. We had enough money that I ate regularly, and I was able to make a couple friends.”

Hannibal sobered considerably at that. “Is that when you met Jimmy?"

"Jimmy?” asked Will, befuddled.

"Yes, the Mr. Dean, you're so fond of." 

Will gives Hannibal an incredulous look: "Jimmy Dean is a sausage company, Hannibal! Not an ex-lover. Christ, didn't you live in the U.S. for, like, twenty years? How do you not know Jimmy Dean?"

Hannibal glowers at him while ticking off his fingers. “Jimmy Carter, Jimmy Buffet, James Dean—it's an incredibly common American name, Will. Do you honestly expect me to remember them all?”

Seriously contemplating making another attempt on Hannibal’s life brings a smile back to Will’s face as he looks at him and says, “Will you let it go if I tell you I like your sausage better?”

Hannibal looks pleased enough at that.

***

Thank you so much for reading my silly ficlet.

I've posted all three parts on AO3 here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/51791779

[windchimeplays]

idk if this should still be labelled as a leak since mhy decided to change his entire design for 4.4 cny/lantern rite event

i first saw this leak before fontaine was even released and i immediately fell in love with lion boy's design, he is based on the mascot for the lion dance, a traditional chinese dance mostly performed on cny and for important personal events like weddings, company openings, etc. to bring in good luck and fortune.

i definitely did not expect them to completely change the design tho

i personally don't like that one random orange strand on his fringe lmfao (his hoodie is so cute tho!!!), i love his first design the best, but the recent leak for the lantern rite event banner which reveals his potentially finalized design disappointed me a lot.

i've never seen a white and blue lion irl, i've always seen either red and orange lions and since they're much more common, it might be why mhy decided to change his colour palette. another that i just realized after mopping around was that they decided to not use white is because it's associated with death and mourning in chinese culture (in opposition to black in the west).

but even so, they could've just changed the colours and not touched his design, now he just looks so basic and lacks the features of a lion mascot unlike the previous two designs ;-;

perfectly understand that these are merely concept arts and are highly likely to change, but as someone who had been waiting so long for him, you can't expect me to not cry over it hahaha

its kinda like the fanart heizou almost two years ago ig, tho most of us are aware that it was a fanart so its different but similar

oh well, looks like i won't be using him, and maybe i can use his first design as a ref for an oc hahaha

edit: i've calmed down a bit sksksk, anyways i saw that there's people who actually prefer his finalised design (which is shocking to me, maybe they're not chinese so they didn't understand)! half a year ago, when i first saw him, i was extremely grateful to mhy for making another culture-ly important character after yunjin who i still love and use for my ayato. while it's hard to tell from the lantern rite leak, bro def didn't have the lion ears anymore and his attire doesn't have any lion design so def a big fat F. idk how to articulate my feelings properly via words (even worse in eng), but i just gotta accept the fact that mhy scrapped an amazing design.

[bluepoodle7]

#Shezow #ThinkingAboutReviewingEachEpisode #Sheviews #MyThoughts

(I will be editing this post a lot and there might be multiple parts.)

I'm thinking about rewatching Shezow again but might make a review on each episode and maybe add my thoughts to it then at the end put what episodes I liked in order.

I wish this show got a second sheason.

Maybe keep the artstyle the same but make it better animated.

Maybe add Dudepow's evil version and Maz's parents.

I'm already dreading She-Phat I remember seeing most of the episodes on The Hub then later just Youtubeing the rest.

--------------------------------

This is my first time reviewing a whole series so go easy on me.

I remember seeing this ad play on the Hub Network Channel when it was a thing.

Then later checked it out.

0:32

Image and video not mine but link is there.

Shezow (Premiere Promo) - Hub Network - YouTube

----------------------

The Pilot differences.

SheeZaam

I have seen the SheeZaam pilot a long time ago when it was basically lost media.

I think this pilot was aired on G4 for the Midnight Spank block but I never watched it but researched about this and the Disney Shezow pilots.

I was too young to watch that and I never knew when it aired.

But I did like the ads for it.

The SheeZaam pilot looks like something I would see on Newgrounds randomly and also the origin of the laser lipstick at 02:20 but it's a actual laser instead of a lightsaber or a beam sword from smash bros.

It's pretty dated like a old school offensive Newgrounds cartoon but for a flash cartoon standards it's okay and it was made in 2005.

If this show stayed adult I know the jokes would either get better with the right writers or worse but it depends on the time period.

I would add these characters as background characters like Joe Halpern just being a trash man then later helping the new Shezow fight crime while making dated jokes and maybe be annoyed by the she puns that replace his cursing.

Maybe make Joe slowly get more progressive in later episodes.

I give it a 5/10.

----------------

The Disney Version Of Shezow.

This aired in 2007 on Disney's Shorty McShorts' Shorts pilot block where I think all the pilots never made it.

I never got to see this on my tv since back then I didn't really watch Disney a lot during those days I was mostly into Cartoon Network, Nick, and maybe other kids networks at the time.

This show really likes the dude looks like a lady joke and the no way José jokes.

I just wonder what the "I wasn't talking about the house." joke was about at 01:02-01:11.

I hope it's not bad.

I wish guy in the new show kept the fart knockers saying though.

Also add back in the bully characters and add José back in as a student that Guy knew before Maz.

01:58

This scene gave me a idea on a artwork I made with the 2012 guy looking in the mirror behind pilot guy.

Also the show made it canon that José was made to not know that Guy and Shezow are the same person which is weird to me but also had a crush on Shezow which is just Guy in bugs bunny drag but not knowing it.

I guess in the 2012 pilot they scrapped that detail.

The Shezow chant is different and its about pinching all the cheeks, the Shelair was hot pink and Sheila is just a lip tv, and feminine intuition or in the 2012 show it's She-S-P or a sixth sense.

The theme is different at 05:09-05:18.

This has the origin of the super sheslap at 03:46-03:48 and the laser lipstick returns but as a laser sword at 04:37 which is interesting to me.

This version of Shezow looks better animated for 2007 then the 2005 which was choppy and I wonder if Disney was brave enough to pick this show up would it be different then the 2012 version.

Also would Guy count as a Disney princess if they made a episode where Shezow got crowned as one?

Also the truck reminds me of the Illbleed trap with the truck from level 3.

The Truck trap I'm talikng about.

A blog about obscurity stuff, plushies and food. on Tumblr - #Woodmill Truck Trap

04:22

Forgot Disney Pilot Shezow has to pull his hair to do the first sonic scream.

02:50-02:59

Also in SheeZaam had that tampon weapon that suck up and contains liquid enemies which is cool.

I wonder if the tv network executives would allow Shezow to carry a tampon or a pad to use as a weapon?

Also the gendered bathroom scene returns in the 2012 version but the 2007 version had it at 05:13.

The 2012 version had the same scene at 0:29.

SheZow Files : She-S-P - YouTube

I give it a 6/10.

SheZow on Vimeo

2012 Shezow Pilot

---------------------

Now we are getting into familiar territory.

The first half is a little different from the Disney pilot.

José is replaced by Maz and has more of a friendship connection than José in the pilot.

Maz has a personality unlike José who is just a joke device and falling in love with your best friend troupe.

The bullies are gone and the "I'm not talking about the house." joke was removed in this pilot.

But in the 2012 Shezow Pilot the movers saying no problem and yep when putting up the furniture in the house.

Instead of in the Disney pilot there is only one mover by himself moving everything inside the house while just saying yep, an mhm noises, yeah, and okay.

The truck crashing scene is not here in the 2012 pilot.

Both guys still have the toxic masculinity sayings like the "girly unpacking" and it's a guy thing".

Both Kelly's still are the most intelligent of the team and Guy in the 2012 makes puns right out the gate.

The 2007 guy kind of sounded a little mean and called his boy squad fart knockers.

The "I'm not talking about the house." joke gets replaced with "Nice digs." and "I wish I had a Aunt Agnus." And Maz is the one to explain what is happening to the mover in the 2012 pilot and in the 2007 pilot it was Guy who said that information.

Both Guy's both toss stuff including the urn of their dead Aunt Agnes and both make the similar saying in both scenes.

Both Guy's make the tacky ring joke.

The Shezow change chants in the 2007 and 2012 are both different.

But the 2012 version of Shezow is the best dressed of the three pilots and also I like the leopard print.

Kelly in the Disney pilot just info dumps what Shezow is while 2012 Kelly is a mega fan and wants to be Shezow. (Remember that for later.)

Both Guy's snatch the ring away from their sisters.

You know what I want to know.

How did both Guy's know the chants when they find it too girly to pay attention to it?

Dude looks like a lady joke returns. 3:37-3:38

And both Guy's say "Say whut?" But the Disney Guy had better delivery of the joke.

I like it that this show has that Ben 10 rule where the user can't take off the ring until the user dies troupe.

The 2012 Shezow pilot has a I wonder what power I have montage.

The Shelair was behind the mirror and is a nice touch.

This shelair looks better than the 2007 Disney pilot and Shelia went from being a mouth tv to being a Ai like character similar to Karen in Spongebob.

02:47

Now we are in the new ideas added to the Shezow story.

I like it how Guy was like nah and then sees the Shehicle then says ok.

Remember Guy and Kelly are 12 and driving.

Guy is pretty good at driving even doing the MIB ceiling driving to avoid traffic.

The whole Shezow can't fly thing. (Keep that for later.)

Guy says Sheilarious at 6:35-6:36.

Shezow is as fast as sonic with super speed but running in heels is something to work on.

The She-S-P gets explained at 7:35-7:36.

Also the commercial break animations are pretty cool and feels like old school anime commercial break things.

7:48-8:14

SheZow S01E01 SheZow Happens & Coldfinger - YouTube

They say "Get the dog's jewels and his too." and that flew over my head when I first watched it and caught me off guard.

8:33-8:35

Yeah the dad hates Shezow for saving the day instead of the police doing it.

Reminds me of the Powerpuff Girls episode with the donut eating cop getting mad that the girls are saving the day instead of the cops.

But I would love to know more about Guy's Dad.

Also the closet threw up on on you joke is a wow.

10:41-10:43.

I want a vinyl figure of Guy in Shezow form with the random stuff he found in his closet to cover up that he is Shezow.

I like it that the show let Maz be part of the Shezow squad instead of being the guesser on why Guy keeps leaving. This is way better than what they did to José.

Also Maz saying a whole bunch of shepuns to guy and him looking annoyed is pretty cool.

I thought they would have made Maz a toxic person but he is just a happy chill guy.

11:17

Guy had to say Sheyeah to change back while in the Disney and SheeZaam pilots I think the power just poofs away then reappears when danger is near but I'm not sure.

Also Sheroes are the canon fan name similar to bronies for Mlp.

I remember the Shezow Creator having a tumblr where you can ask him questions but it's long gone now but I know a few things from looking at Tumblr from the outside without a account in the past.

Like Shezap is both male and female.

And how Aunt Agnes died and who killed her.

Shezow and Logan did go out but it was for a Shezow thing.

The creator is okay with Guy and Maz being a thing.

Maz's parents if shown were one is male and one is female.

Is a White and Asian couple.

I give this show a 8/10.

Images not mine but links are there.

The Shezow Tumblr that archived the creator's posts.

The Shezow Database! on Tumblr - #post by Obie Scott Wade