#but i am enjoying this!! i'm just making a bunch of blocks without really planning what the outcome will look like
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kayleerowena · 1 year ago
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been chipping away at a new quilt
edit: for some reason this keeps getting rbed by terfs????? dear terfs, please fuck off and die. everyone else please enjoy this quilt<3
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vizthedatum · 2 months ago
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reflections on my polyamory
I feel so much lighter about my polyamory practice after so much reflection this year.
I didn't date that much this year - my only major relationship was with my ex-girlfriend (who is one of my best friends, and I love her so dearly. I am so thankful for her to be in my life).
I went on a couple of sporadic dates, made some really awesome friends, blocked some people who weren't good for me, was broken up after three dates with someone over the summer, and generally AGONIZED about finding someone. (I also agonized over not being able to get over someone from the past and was angry at my ex-spouse. (I think the anger has been good for me!)))
It's not that I'm not lonely anymore - I am. But I'm releasing (slowly) that pull to be with someone just for the sake of thinking that's where I should be right now.
I value connection and natural alignment more than brute-forcing myself into some sort of relationship. I want it all to happen way more naturally, and I no longer want to be afraid of how I feel. I want to tell people how I feel and see if we can work out something. I want to ask, "Hey, do you want to do something with me? A partnership? Being lovers? Friends? Something else we can both define? Or should we part ways because you don't feel the same way or don't want to make a commitment?"
I want to tell people I love them without fear, and I'm getting SO MUCH better at that.
--
I started dating someone new recently (only one date, a second date planned, and already a bunch of good conversations).
And... I realized:
I like this person very initially, but I don't want to force myself or them to fit into a relationship mold of any kind. It may not work out. It may be an amazing friendship. It could be something else! It's nice to not know... and just communicate enthusiastically.
It's not that I don't want definition in my relationships - I do. With time. With the evolving communication.
I feel secure with our conversation and admire their maturity - I already don't feel like I need to second-guess myself when I tell them stuff (and I hope that continues!)
I think I have fundamentally changed how I behave, to be honest - I ask for a lot of clarity, and I will continue to do so.
--
I feel more at peace with just enjoying and loving people as long as they're in my life. Yes, breaks or deviations from my expectations will still emotionally affect me, but they will not completely devastate me to the point of non-functioning. I don't think I could have said that before.
Even with my last friend-breakup, yes, I was so so hurt. I did say I was "devastated," but I wasn't non-functional. I wasn't ruminating constantly over it. And I understood that I didn't have or want control over how that ended up evolving. I have way too much respect for him, and I have way too much respect for myself.
My polyamory, as I've been saying really confidently all year, includes friendships (I think it always has... and when I've brought this up to people in the past, some people were like "well, I don't consent to being part of your polycule" and to that, I say: You don't have to be part of a polycule if you don't want to be - it's about your impact on me, our chosen responsibilities to each other, and our connection (in the group of connections of whoever we choose to interact with)... it's just how I define my love, energy, and commitment).
Defining my energy and commitment... helps me not burn out. I LOVE BEING IN CONNECTION WITH PEOPLE, but I cannot lose the connection with myself again.
And I also don't want to be connected with people who seek to control me in a relationship. I don't want there to be cheating within a relationship (and I think the "cheating" conversation should be had with people - it can include *personal* boundaries, but I do not think it should limit what people do, because if it does, then maybe the relationship should be scrutinized more - maybe it needs to be redefined.)
I still have feelings, obviously. I am my own person, and things affect me the way they affect me based on my unique life experience! If I have a partner I feel hurt by, I will tell them that, even if they didn't have that intention. If I think that someone is non-commital or isn't contributing to the relationship the way I need them to, I will talk to them about it (and we'll go from there).
My brand of polyamory isn't about shirking from responsibility. It's also about being true to myself. I don't want to hurt someone; if I am, I need to figure out how to repair that relationship with that person OR LEAVE. If someone repeatedly hurts me without any change, efforts to repair, or acknowledgment, then I need to leave.
And yeah... I think I still do want to nest with someone or someones from time to time. And I still want kids.
But I can have meaningful relationships (whether or not they include platonic, romantic, sexual, etc. elements), whether or not they include nesting or co-parenting, and I didn't think I could before.
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dee-the-red-witch · 2 years ago
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Time for a new pinned.
Yes, Hi. I'm Dee. I'm a queer trans woman in her 40's, I'm absolutely NOT your responsible adult, in addition to reblooping all manner of weird shit, blocking accounts without a profile pic or bio, and generally shitposting all over the place, I do a lot of stuff.
Here's me:
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As for what I ACTUALLY do, well, there's a lot of that.
I make masks:
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And all sorts of other leatherworks:
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I also write books, and do digital art as well, even put out a tarot deck with a guidebook that has a full-length queer horror novel in the back:
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I do readings from that deck every week, and review moves and sometimes books, and eventually I'll get back to posting more book draft updates over here on my Patreon. A lot of that's free access, if you just want to follow, and almost all of it's available for only 2 bucks a month. Or I've got a Ko-Fi, with zero plans to update it or do anything beyond letting it exist as a support account. I can only do so much, and I'm ALREADY overextended.
I 've also got a merch store- cue one batch of utterly random, weird, and aggressively queer graphic design.
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Also, I enjoy self-tattooing and drawing up my own flashwork for it as a hobby, like Destiny 2 and a bunch of horror games, have leftist politics, engage in mutual aid where I can, love watching all sorts of movies, have 2 kids, am poly with a few partners, and am otherwise BUSY.
You can ask questions or send messages, and no I'm not gonna let you do so anonymously- all answers also get posted. Anyways, enough making you scroll, when you're really here for whatever reblog you're trying to find to yell at me about. Carry on.
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ramblingdisaster73 · 2 years ago
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Hi, I just wanted to say that I agree with anon. I don't know whose fault it is, if Tim's or the journalist or a combination of both, but what is reported as his interview didn't seem particularly accurate with what they've shown, and they rarely are, at least in Tim's case. I don't know if he does it on purpose to be misleading or what, but I'm learning to not put much weight on it (though it's difficult). Ignoring that framing, episodes are just a bit better, and even if they're not clear they're at least up to different interpretations, which I can be fine with knowing they have to make choices on what to show and what leave for fans to fill.
(That was true for the whole secret marriage thing too, if he hadn't said it wasn't a lie and it wasn't a real marriage or whatever it would have been okay, not perfect because we didn't get real resolution or some other things I wished they showed on screen instead of just imagining happening, but no one else ever implied any of what HE said).
As for the zilla comment I get your concerns, but it may not be that bad in the end, it may well be an exaggeration to attract those who enjoy over the top wedding planning drama.
I think if I hadn’t seen a bunch of TK haters salivating over the chance to blame him for whatever happens to ruin the wedding by being a groomzilla – it started immediately after the article dropped – I would just be able to roll my eyes and ignore it like I did with a few things he said the last couple of seasons.
The EW article is full of what the fuck takes – the zilla one is the least of my issues with it – but would have been a super simple one to have correct. If either the journalist or Tim had said “Owen will be the Dadzilla of Carlos and TK’s nightmares” or something along those lines – I would have laughed and continued to look forward to the wedding planning (even while praying for all wedding planners with clients that watch this show – cause there will be people that think you can pull off a 150 person wedding in 4-5 weeks, on a budget that probably isn’t super high) instead of posting about it, but one of them chose to frame it totally different from any info we do have.
I think another part about it that bothers me is that when one of the people getting married is a zilla – they are typically absolutely horrible to the person that they are marrying – which is what the TK haters are hoping for and already celebrating. These are the people that feed off of TK and Carlos friction – the ones that can’t say enough how TK doesn’t love or deserve Carlos – it almost feels like that is how Tim feels too. It’s exhausting and my blocking fingers are getting tired.
 You can do over the top wedding planning without making the show’s constant scape goat an asshole – if we are talking in character – Carlos is the one that is most likely and has a very high probability of being the groomzilla – that one would be very in character.
Saying that TK is going to be a groomzilla is basically making the 4x08 episode (the supposed wedding planning episode) a TK vs Carlos situation when we have been led to believe that it would be a TK & Carlos vs Owen & Andrea – which is what I was really looking forward too. It feels like a lot of the season has already been Carlos vs TK – why keep that up when we are supposed to be watching them plan a wedding?
I know I ventured a bit off topic – but these are the reasons why the zilla thing is so fucking irritating to me. It’s probably how anyone feels when they are watching a TV show make the industry you work in so vastly different than what it is like IRL – Like doctors watching med shows – firefighters watching the 9-1-1s probably have to separate reality from fiction – but sometimes what we are being asked to believe is just so “what the fuck” that our brains start to meltdown over the insanity of it – or the lack of simple research that could have been done on the writer’s part.
I am currently working on a fic that will have some of my horror stories from weddings that are stuck in my brain – and almost all of them are from some sort of zilla – the slaps, the screaming, the fights, the crying.
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jas-jas-dev · 1 month ago
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Welcome to the blog!
This Blog will be a weird combination between a Portolio and a Social Media Outlet for all my Cool Stuff!
I'm Jasper a Second Year Game Design Student with a passion for making Tools
(Blog and Portfolio Details under the cut)
Who am I as a Dev?
I'm a nerd Design who loves making Tools! And with Tools I mean Wave-Spawners, Level Editors, I'm even working on a Tool that'd let people quickly send reaction images in Discord servers!
I'm a student at BUAS so most of my expertise lies in Unreal Engine, but I've done Hobby projects in Godot, and have a basic understanding of Unity
The thing I love most is making Tools, and that will probably also be the thing I post the most about, but I have received a deep education on Game Design, I've designed levels, single handely designed and implemented games that testers really enjoyed and simply know my way around Game Design
And I also feel I'm quite good at coming up with Novel-Varations, while of course an idea isn't worth anything without the skills to actually follow up on it, I still feel quite confident in my ability to come up with Novel Ideas within a system and in helping my fellow designers come up with or further explore the ideas and systems they have
I'm also educating myself on Art right now, I've always had a love for Animation and have a decent history with learning Pixel Art, and though I have made some decent works, it's still nowhere near satisfied! And I believe my current biggest weakness is the bigger Shapes and proportions, so I'll try getting a basis in traditional 2D art in the next block!
And finally I've been told I'm quite Self-Critical, which you'll probably find throughout this blog, and will pop-up even more in real conversations (this blog is meant to be Fun! And me constantly pointing out the holes in my projects probably won't be super fun to read so I'll try to keep it to a minimum)
What is this Blog?
My Primary Goal for this blog is to make Entertainment for any tumblr users who stumble across it
I'm in the business of Entertainment after all! So it'll do me some good to try and make this blog fun to read! Though that will mean that my personality here won't be a proper representation of the real me! I don't know how I'll talk here just yet, I'll try a bunch of stuff and see what clicks!
With a Secondary Goal of using it as an inbetween Portfolio Meaning I'll put all my impressive School or Hobbyist work here so I'll have an easier time putting together the big scary portolfio later, and if anyone does show interest in me before said portfolio is done I can always point them to this!
I'm also doing this blogging on Tumblr since it's where I'm most at home! I'm planning to slowly start expanding to Linked-in and Bluesky after I find my style of reporting here!
DM's and Asks Open: I'd love to talk to other people about anything related to Game-Dev! Whether they be hobbysts or industry and whether they want to talk about programming or design, I'd love to have a chat!
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draftingteacups · 3 years ago
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Soni and the Ghost Marriage Event
Note: I don't know if I'll ever write anything for the Ghost Marriage Event for the story, so I decided to make this a cool thing for Valentine's Day 👍💖
So yeah, enjoy this What If Scenario everyone! In this What If Scenario, people know that she's the Champion/Grand Duchess and used Mega Evolution already.
The Start
Soni is a heavy sleeper, so she probably wouldn't hear the chaos of her Pokemon fighting against the ghost army until they were right at her bedroom door
Ghost: "We are going to take over this place for her Highness!"
Soni looking very unamused: "Oh really? Do you not know that you're in the presence of a Grand Duchess, the highest authority in her land?"
Ghost: "M-Miss, please don't mess around! We know all the royals here in Twisted Wonderland!"
Soni, her eyes turning sharp at the BS she needs to deal with in the morning: "Ha! I'm not from Twisted Wonderland as I'm from an entirely different world, yet it still applies all the same! If you need to know of my qualifications, let me show you my Pokemon's true strength."
Yeah, she manages to kick out the Ghosts and seal them off using special Ghost balms that Sam had in his store combined with her own Pokémon using their powers to block them off
Soni went back to sleep, calling it a vacation day; she ain't gonna deal with this crap hell no
Needless to say, when the whole school got taken over and the whole Operation begins, everyone headed over to Ramshackle as it was the only place that the Ghosts hadn't taken over if what the Ghosts were saying were real
Ghost: "Stop what you're doing! In the name of her Majesty's happiness-!"
Soni: "Oh, I am a Majesty and you're making me very unhappy right now. Get out of my sight."
Ghost: "WAHHH-!" *POOF*
Ghosts were scrambling to go into Ramshackle, only to get rebuffed and destroyed in an instant
Everyone just going, "Ah yes, the one person who could probably single-handed destroy the school, have a good day- wait, we need your help-!"
Soni is not amused
Meanwhile, Eliza is wondering who the heck has taken over Ramshackle because her guards apparently insulted royalty without realizing it and trespassed
Idia is just relieved by the fact that Soni's a huge Boss Battle that no one can overcome and is stalling out time for him to not get taken to the Ghost World
Crowley does his whole roundabout "Save Idia-kun" speech and gets the others to help out
Soni only helps once Crowley gives her a nice hefty bonus because she's not getting fooled by his tricks again
Everyone's gotten through their ideas and people think just throwing her at the bride to destroy her would solve the problem
Soni's like "Nah, it wouldn't get rid of her permanently" and she wasn't going to spend eternity fighting off this person
Thus Operation: Propose was born
As the guys work together to deal with the Operation, Ace, Deuce, and Grim just cheer on Soni for beating the crap out of the Ghosts
Swanna's helping them out because those Ghosts have been pissing it off
Croagunk's also joining the party
Soni: "You guys are the worst for just sitting there like a bunch of Duckletts."
Ace: "You're the only one with limitless power to handle these guys, teacher's pet!"
Deuce: "I need to take care of Happiny and I don't want her to distract you when you're busy."
Grim: "I tried to fight them off earlier, but you were sleeping a whole bunch, henchman!"
Soni is very not amused
Lunch rolls around and then everyone's treated to Soni's cooking while watching Round 1 of the suitors getting slapped
Deuce gets dragged away by Cater for the operation and Happiny's not happy about it; Uncle Ace takes over with Riddle assisting him
Soni's brain is working overtime at plans because this is almost doomed to fail
Now, Deuce can talk to Soni now, but that was after prolonged exposure to her and being her friend with Happiny in the mix.
If you add his inability to talk with women plus the stressful situation at hand, he's definitely going to freeze up still.
Eliza: "What kind of talent do you have?"
Deuce: "...Ah-"
Eliza: *slaps him* "How dare you ignore my question!"
Cater: "Ahaha, Deuce-chan really can't talk to anyone outside of his family and Assistant-chan, can he?"
Deuce flusters around: "It's different!"
Meanwhile, Happiny is not amused by this lady slapping her daddy; how mean!
Angy Happiny goes to crush the Ghosts with boulders and sends them scrambling back to NRC in a heartbeat wait how does that work with ghosts
Ghost 1: "Your highness, we've encountered another problem at the dorm! A small, pink monster is throwing boulders at us!"
Deuce: !!! "Happiny!"
Cater: "Aw, Happiny-chan really loves her daddy~"
Deuce: "Cater-senpai, please be quiet-!"
Eliza: "The little monster's name is Happiny? And she's your child??"
Eliza's just confused by this information
Then Eliza sees Happiny from a photo from Cater's phone that the guards confiscated and instantly falls in love with the little one; look at how cute she is!
Eliza deems Happiny an ideal Flower Girl and the Ghosts rush off to pick her up; Deuce is not happy at all by this
In the chaos, Soni is doing her best to keep everyone safe, but none of the students can assist her because they need to keep trying for Operation: Propose
Happiny gets taken from Ace and Riddle, even as they're doing their best to protect the little bun
Soni is ready to throw hands with this Princess and Ace has to keep her calm; it's not at all easy because he's pretty pissed off himself at this whole situation now
Meanwhile, Happiny's just crying 🥺🥺🥺
Happiny's white stone from her mom and dad is taken in favor of a bunch of flowers in her pouch and Happiny is incredibly upset because the white stone is important to the little bun
Happiny adamantly refuses to smile and pouts, looking upset and adorable; Eliza plays with Happiny's hair and removes the ribbon that looks like her mom's for something more fitting for the wedding
The little bun is even more upset and wails
Leona's like "Please make her stop crying. It's terrible on my ears."
Cater is guilty because it was his big mouth that got Happiny in this mess
Happiny sits near Deuce and cries while Deuce wishes that he can pick her up and comfort her, but he's stuck in place due to the curse; it's a total nightmare come to life
Swanna gets taken into the Marriage Hall and causes chaos that everyone's happy about this time around, just plain pissed by this Ghost Bride who thinks the Pokemon would be a wonderful symbol for their wedding
Vil says, "Ah yes, chaotic and noisy- very fitting for this marriage."
Everyone watching this sees Soni look like she's gonna storm into NRC, but Crowley distracts her saying that they needed to gather as many people for the Operation
Operation: Propose is on the shoulders of Rook, Epel, Riddle, and Ace in the end
As they're getting dressed up though, Sam guides her to the back to show off a few new items
Soni: "Sam? I thought you showed off what I needed?"
Sam: "Well, little lady, you definitely will need this! It's something that only you can have!"
Soni stares at the items in question: "...You've got to be kidding me."
Soni is highly not amused and will badger Crowley for a pay raise
The boys go into the school being told the Soni will be right behind them
They're so confused by the fact that she's hiding though
Ace: "Eh? She'll be in the shadows, ready to save us if we need it?"
Crowley: "Yes, Miss Monet is the person who's been responsible for holding them back. They'll automatically attack her if they know who she is."
Riddle: "I truly don't understand why she isn't leading the charge, Headmaster."
Crowley smiles: "Well, she has her own weaknesses."
Everyone except Rook: ???
Rook: "Ah, even the strongest of people will have their own fragility. How beautiful!"
Like Soni's in the shadows ready to assist them and they can hear her, but they can't see her
Soni watches Epel coming with a horse and just goes, "Ah yes, Eliza's acting out a stereotypical fairytale princess ending"
She watches everyone do their proposals and commends them for the whole speech
Then Riddle lights the ghosts on fire for his height being mentioned
Soni tells them to get moving with the ghosts coming at them; Ace wonders what's the big deal with her hiding in the shadows
Soni just tells him to get moving don't you dare ask again
Meanwhile, Idia's dressed up and ready; the Bride took to preparing in a spare room in order to get ready
Happiny throws things at the guards that try to put more stuff on her, pouting all the way
Little Happiny distracts the guards that way because little bun can throw things fast and hard
Deuce honestly has been going through the worst hours of his life, so he's full-out supporting Happiny in his state
Eliza tells him to control Happiny, but he refuses, saying that Happiny wants the things that they've taken from her back; Eliza says that would clash with the wedding theme
The wedding goes as expected with Ace running into the room and the guards trying to stop them
Ace: "Honestly, stop trying to find someone who doesn't exist! A marriage partner should be someone who'll you laugh or cry with. Someone who'll stay by your side no matter how hard it is. Honestly, this is such a pain! What kind of talk did you surround her with?!"
Ghosts: "Don't be so unkind to the Princess' dreams! She's been looking for 500 years!"
Eliza: "...Someone who doesn't exist...?"
Ace: "You're honestly a terrible person, just doing whatever you please. I swear I've seen this situation before."
Cater and Trey laugh nervously; Happiny's never been happier to see Uncle Ace and cries louder for him to help Deuce
The rest of the Tuxedo Gang appears and everything seems to be going to plan, but the ghosts keep respawning.
They get held back as the wedding continues; Idia's doing his best to stay away from Eliza and wonders where the heck is Soni please save himmmmm-!
Chubby: "We will ensure that the Princess' dreams come true! She's dealt with too much to have her Ideal Prince snatched away!"
???: "They aren't even dreams. They're nothing more than unfulfilled promises and fantasies by people who enjoy watching this circus. That's why you're on this planet still, right?"
???: "Honestly, you're so delusional. It's making me laugh."
Everyone: ??!
Chubby: "Show yourself, villain!"
???: "Villain...? Me? What a joke!"
???: "I'm pissed off at you for all the crap you've put me through today! Hurting others for the sake of your happiness, putting a literal child through this crap!"
???: "You talk about loving someone, but you're deluding yourself into thinking that forcing that love on someone else is fine when it's absolutely not!"
???: "You call me a villain when you come here and treat people who don't meet your impossible standards like trash! You don't see reality because you're stuck in your own head! Worst of all, you don't even consider the harm you're causing others because you're so fixated on a person so perfect and ideal when such a thing doesn't exist!"
Soni teleports into the room with a flourish of her SSR tier wedding gown ensemble with Dior and Primrose by her side: "People like you should go six feet under and stay there!"
Soni's outfit looks similar to Black Tea's Fragrant Rosebud dress, but with blue accents instead of pink, white gloves, and without the cleavage dip; She's holding out a bouquet of blue roses for sucking up negative energy as well with her hair down for once
Soni tells Primrose to unleash Aromatherapy to release the paralyzed students and they are freed from the curse, shocking Eliza because how in the world had her slap been nullified-?
Happiny is so happy to see her mama and runs over to her side, throwing away the flowers that kept getting stuffed into her pouch
Happiny just gets calmed instantly by the love and concern radiating off of Soni; Eliza's doubly shocked by the appearance of another bride
Eliza: "Wait, are you the royal my guards have been talking about all day?"
Soni smiles angrily with a vein pulsing on her head: "Yes, I'm so glad to finally meet you. Shall I repay your slaps towards my fellow students and utter disregard for Happiny's distress tenfold?"
Happiny: "Happiny!" Go, mommy, go!
Dior and Primrose get to work destroying the ghosts who honestly cannot reform fast enough with everyone finally free from their binds
If they get overwhelmed, then Soni sends out Aegis who terrifies everyone into staying back because Aegis sucks up the ghosts' life energy without hesitation
Leona told her that she should've done this hours ago, but Soni was busy trying to figure out a way to safely get everything done without being a casualty
Vil while he's fighting off the ghosts comments where she found the dress and Soni just says, "Sam had it."
Suddenly Ace and Riddle realize why she never appeared from her hiding spot, no matter how much they asked her why
Chubby goes Gigantimax and Soni releases Mega Evolution for Dior with the Tuxedo Boys helping out massively; Dior's been at the frontlines keeping them safe, so they had to return the favor
In the battle, Eliza gets slapped by Soni multiple times, each one leaving a terrible bruise on her cheeks for each of the guys who got paralyzed as well as Happiny's unhappiness
Chubby tries to stop Soni, but Soni beats him up with her bare hands like "Bitch, you better be joking."
Everyone at NRC is cheering her on, by the way 🤣
Eliza realizes that Chubby is her Prince Charming, but Soni's like "Screw your happy ending, you better give me compensation for all the destruction you caused at Ramshackle as well as Happiny's distress for your tantrums."
During the clean-up to which Soni managed to get paid for since she was not the damned janitor, Soni cleans out Happiny's pouch and fixes her up back to normal
Happiny promptly passes out from crying so much and snores; Deuce is handed Happiny and he's just trying not to feel terrible about what happened
Then the conversation with Ace's Ghost Marriage SSR happens
Soni has varying reactions to the others and their perspective on love
Soni isn't too surprised by Deuce's lack of girls approaching him during his Delinquent stage
She thinks that Jack's dedication to one person is honestly admirable, but she can see how it could be overwhelming to people if they're not up to that sort of thing
She just snickers when Sebek talks about the whole letter thing
When Ace brings up his example about focusing on his studies, Soni's in agreement that saying that it honestly felt way too soon for something like love anyways
Ortho tells them all about how genuine Ace was during his speech and everyone, including Soni, teases him about it
Then Ortho tells them the statistics with Soni's speech
Ortho: "According to my data, Soni-san was concerned about everyone that was involved. There's a guaranteed likelihood that her words on love are genuine!"
Soni: "Forcing someone to love you is just straight-up wrong. It's honestly kind of annoying."
Ace: "Who's the unlucky guy that tried to pull that on you? How hard did you turn him down? Did you punch him?"
Soni looks like she's done with everything for the 1000th time: "It wasn't just one person. I don't remember any of their names because they're not that important."
Turns out Soni has gotten a sizable amount of fan mail and love letters from people since she was 14; that number has only risen in recent years
All of them were rejected in favor of Soni not really being interested in love because doing so would be a pain to deal with on top of her regular duties as Champion
She's also been faced with people who say that she should love them because of their gifts, which makes her really annoyed because love nor affection cannot be bought
In the end, she's fine with not being in a relationship, despite people online saying that she should be interested in it.
Deuce: "W-Wow... I never expected you to be super popular."
Epel: "It's honestly impressive how used to this situation you are."
Soni: "Like I've said in the past, the faster you deal with the source of the problem, the less bullshit you need to deal with in the future. Works very well against dramatic people."
Ortho: "Soni-san, I can tell that you're rather romantic in your own way though! Dealing with your duties first and foremost is pretty cool! But I sensed a bit of longing in your voice too."
Soni: "....That's because I was thinking of my parents. My mom and dad were pretty romantic with one another. They weren't perfect, but nothing really is in the world."
The others are curious and then Soni details how her mom and dad met near one of the most romantic sights in the region, the old Lumiose Tower.
It wasn't love at first sight, but genuine curiosity on her dad's part about her mom's culture and Johto as he'd never talked to someone from there before
Kirako not-yet-Monet was horribly shy and scared due to the cultural stances between men and women in Johto, but Zavier Monet was respectful of her wishes and what she wanted
It wasn't a perfect first meeting, but they were friends far before they ever fell in love
Zavier Monet was a traveling trainer who had 8 Gym Badges from his home region of Galar and was traveling Kalos as it'd been his father's homeland
Kirako not-yet-Monet had little experience in traveling, much less being a Pokemon Trainer, and did so as to be independent of her family who were... less than kind about her departure, to say the least
Zavier met Kirako again, this time on the way out from Lumiose City and they decided to travel to their next point of travel together; and then another; and then another
Ortho: "It really sounds like a true love story of friends falling in love!"
Jack: "It's honestly a nice story."
Soni picks at her white gloves where her marks lay: "... It really is."
Soni: "Well, I'm certainly not as romantic as Ace, that's for sure."
Ace: "Hey!"
Soni doesn't really care if romance never comes for her. She's got all she needs at this very moment.
Happiny: "Happy Hap!" Mommy, you look pretty in the gown!
Soni: "Thank you, Happiny."
There's also a part of me that wonders if any of the boys would try to bridal style carry Soni for fun because hey, why not?
Soni is definitely not amused by it though
Jack can lift her with ease, although he's shy about it and Soni just keeps quiet as to not embarrass him
Epel can lift her up and Soni asks him to be careful to not trip on the dress because it's pretty long
Sebek nearly drops her because he didn't expect her to feel so heavy and she straight up hits him with the bouquet of flowers in retaliation
Both Deuce and Soni turn red for different reasons; Deuce never expected to be doing this sort of thing and Soni can hear Happiny cheering like please stop baby
Deuce did carry Ace before piggyback-style, both in the story and from Croagunk's Poison Jabs
Bridal style with Soni wearing an actual wedding gown- nope, his brain went poof-
Soni can understand Happiny and Happiny's basically going, "Mommy and Daddy are getting married!"
Like it's cute, but it's still embarrassing to hear; worse, only Soni could understand what Happiny was saying, but others could guess what the little bun is saying based on the sheer happiness radiating off of Happiny and the situation
The first thing that Ace said when Soni got lifted was, "Crap, you're heavier than I thought you were."
Soni said, "How is it that I managed to carry you bridal-style and I didn't even complain as much?"
They bicker about it and promptly stop by Othro commenting how the two of them really looked like a proper groom and bride
Like Epel's dressed up like a groom too, but it looked more like a sibling carry; Epel's sulking over it
With Ace, it really looked like two people that trusted one another in carrying them, even if they fought
Soni just wants the day to be over and sleep because running around in heels is exhausting
Ace says that he wouldn't be interested in someone like her because that'd be a weird thing for him to think about.
She's his friend first and foremost
....Well, that's if he's not going to end up in this romantic What-If here.
I wish you guys good vibes today! 💖👍
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smallesttits · 3 years ago
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◇Horrible Liars finish last◇
Bored. So ima post this lol.
THAT ONE DUDE FROM GINNY AND GEORGIA HIS NAME WAS MARCUS I THINK LOL
Smut baby: smut.
°in this lil mf Ginny and her dramatic and ungrateful ass doesn't exist, you are the new and improved y/n°
If I'm being honest, I didnt finish this show sooooooo
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I laid on my soft bed, bored as hell with nothing to do and nobody to talk to. I mean I guess I could go call max, but am I really in the mood to go hang out with a bunch of girls who do irresponsible things nonstop and think it's perfectly fine? Not really, no.
I pick up my phone and see a couple messages and snaps from group chats and hunter.
Jesus Christ hunter is annoying.
I sigh, throwing my phone back onto my bed and roll onto my stomach, pushing my face into the covers.
The window creeps open making me squeal in fright.
"relax, it's just me." Marcus silences me quickly.
"what are you doing??" I frown, getting up and walking over to the door on the opposite side of the room and locking it. Just in case you know?
"max is boring, and everyone else seems to have other plans. Came to see what you were up to." He answered, leaning against the wall beside the window.
"well as you can see I'm obviously doing nothing, so why don't you just get on your way and go annoy someone else." I roll my eyes, picking my phone up again and seeing more group chat texts and snaps from hunter. Again. Im this close to blocking this dude.
"Mhm.." he mumbles, sliding over near me while I snap hunter back, me holding up the middle finger and saying 'stop fucking snapping me boy'
He slides his hands down my waist, and nuzzles his head into my dry curls.
"Marcus what-"
"Just go with it babe," he grins Into my hair, now moving his hands to my leggings, and popping the elastic around my waist.
I gasped, and leaned my head back, on his chest as he continued to invade my pants.
"M-Marcus we shouldn't be doing this," I moan out when he goes under my underwear and starts to slightly massage my clit.
"Mhm, yeah. We shouldn't," he agreed smirking again, not stopping his slow movements. I arched my back against the bed, quietly moaning and shutting my legs around his hand. He grunts and pulls his hand away from my clit, now prying my legs open forcefully.
"Marcus wait-" I went to push him away, but he snatched off my leggings a once, snapping the small band of my underwear after. It tingled and burned, but the pleasure he soon gave me blocked it away.
His soft, drying lips connected to my clitoris, sucking it into his mouth quickly. My leg muscles tightened, and I reached down to pull at his long black hair. My phone starts to blare, and I whimper as I reach for it.
Expecting Marcus to stop his sucking, he never failed to. His finger came up to tap my excessively wet entrance, and I squirmed in his hold.
Hunter: hey, what are you up to?
Hunter: y/n?
Hunter: you usually answer fast.. am I interrupting something?
Hunter: ok sorry, I shouldn't accuse you of anything until we talk.
Hunter: y/n?
Hunter: I'm sorry, answer me please
Hunter: are you going to the sophomore sleepover?
3 notifications from Hunter🗣on snapchat
I groaned in annoyance, which quickly turned into a yelp of pleasure when Marcus shoved his finger deep into me.
"Aww, hunter spamming you again? Hm?" He asked rhetorically, knowing exactly what was going on.
I placed my phone down and rolled my eyes, just enjoying the feeling of him going down on me.
My phone blared once more, a phone call. I panicked, picking it up and immediately answering without checking the caller id.
"Y/n? Why arent you answering? What are you doing? I ask a-" hunter blew up, asking a million questions as she just listened and tried to let no sounds of pleasure out.
Marcus wouldnt stop, like his life depended on it.
Cutting hunter off, I said a quick and quiet hello, trying to think of a lie I could make up to not be suspicious.
"Answer my questions y/n. What are you doing?" He demanded. I whimpered, obviously not from his words. But from the sight in front of me as I sat perched on my elbows.
"I just woke u-up ok? My m-moms gonna kill me if she find o-out I'm on the phone t-this late! Sorry, i-i gotta g-go," I moaned the last part, as marcus' long finger jabbed my g-spot. Hanging up immediately, my head fell back as i moaned loudly, cumming on his face, fingers and my bed.
Falling almost limp, I beg for air as I stare at the ceiling. Marcus crawls up and on top on me, holding me to him before flipping so I was on top of him.
"Your a horrible liar, you know that right?" He sighed, bringing his fingers up to my mouth. He tapped them, making me suck my juices off of him. He grinned and licked his fingers after, reaching down to cradle my ass.
"What do you mean? I'm not a bad liar," I lied, looking at him.
"Its 7pm, y/n." He simply stated, laughing out.
Yall might hate me because this ain't my normal content butttt it was in my drafts for about 2 months so I mostly edited it and yeahhhh
Suck it up if you don't like it lol
LILY OUTTT LMFAOOO~
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yemilnisu · 4 years ago
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INCORRECT HAIKYUU QUOTES FROM BUZZFEED UNSOLVED PT. 2
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nisu entries:
a part two because i said so 🥴 i really enjoy these and you guys seems to enjoy it too i assume 💀 and i may or may not have a part 3 in my drafts ksksks
warning: swearing
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「part 1」
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Kenma: i don’t think anybody wants to spend any time here (earth)
Kuroo: that! so they (aliens) just blow it up.
Kenma: oh. *shrugs* if that happens, who cares?
Kuroo: i care because i live here!
Kenma: yeah, but then everyone's dead so nothing matters and that's kinda cool. i mean, what a privilege it would be-
Kuroo: you sound like a movie villain right now!
«────── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ──────»
Suna: i'm not even thinking that. i'm tweetin' and i'm streaming. wait- do i have my significant social media followers?
Osamu: you don’t have any following at this point 'cause you're suna rintaro in the timeline where you're at nasa.
Suna: …oh. i don’t even wanna live.
«────── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ──────»
Matsukawa: you know, this was supposed to be the season of respecting ghosts and every time i've tried to do that, you yell at me to disrespect them.
Oikawa: i'm telling you to be true to who you are.
Matsukawa: i mean, that is certainly valid.
Oikawa: (laughs)
Matsukawa: 'cause i am living a lie otherwise because we're talking to air!
«────── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ──────»
Akaashi: oh, i see it. there's a bird right there.
Bokuto: oh, there's a bunch up there. hey, bros.
«────── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ──────»
Nishinoya: you know, i didn’t walk down west cell block.
*nishinoya humming and walking to west cell block*
Nishinoya: it's nice over here, i like it.
(high pitched whistling)
(distant thudding)
Nishinoya: *stops*
Nishinoya: if that's somebody up there, make that noise again in your cell.
(distant thud)
Nishinoya: ha-ha i fucking hate this place. i really do.
«────── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ──────»
Voice: (whispers) atsumu.
Atsumu: who is that?
Atsumu: *looking around for the voice* *lowkey scared*
Osamu: do you hear the little whispers?
Atsumu: please.
Osamu: oops. (laughs)
Suna: *behind the camera snickering because he was the one who suggested it*
«────── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ──────»
Lev: oh fuck, i forgot the spirit box, shit.
Kenma: go get it!
Lev: my hands are full 🥺
Kenma: well, try your best.
«────── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ──────»
Bokuto: *baby voice* it's a little cockroach. you seen any ghosts up here, fella?
Kuroo: (laughs)
«────── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ──────»
Ushijima: do you feel like you have someone else's thoughts?
Tendou: sometimes.
Ushijima: that wasn't the question. i think you misunderstood me.
«────── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ──────»
Kuroo: so right now, we’re in the captain's quarters.
Kuroo: is there anybody in here that wants to speak to us?
Bokuto: spill your beans, buddy.
Kuroo: what did you do on this ship?
Bokuto: he probably commanded it.
Kuroo: you know, i was asking him.
Bokuto: what'd you do on this ship?
«────── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ──────»
Tanaka: if you'd like us to leave and shut up, which frankly almost anybody who interacts with us for more than five minutes would like us to do, move something.
Nishinoya: spank us on the bottom!
«────── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ──────»
Sakusa: i mean, this sink is absolutely disgusting. this is maybe the scariest thing i’ve seen in all six seasons of this show.
«────── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ──────»
Oikawa: *waving at his reflection*
Oikawa: always nice to see a friendly face.
«────── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ──────»
Sakusa: i don’t know why people think darkness is actually scary because i can’t see anything. it was scarier when the lights were on 'cause i could see you know filth, things falling apart.
«────── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ──────»
Semi: (knocking) let's boogie, folks! little guy needs a win. ghost, that would be great. if you got a mummy or a vampire, also good. i think he'd also count that as sort of proof of the supernatural.
«────── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ──────»
Tsukishima: please haunt me! i’m begging you to haunt me! scare the shit out of me! do something! (laughs)
Tsukishima: how many times do i have to plead with air, with nothing? i’m speaking to no one right now.
«────── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ──────»
Shirabu: if you don’t pop out, then i’ve wasted several years of my life. i mean, i went to college, and my major was not ghost hunting.
«────── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ──────»
Osamu: what's 'tsumu doing in there? who the hell knows? he's probably gonna take out his little spirit box.
*meanwhile at atsumu*
Atsumu: i’m gonna fire up the spirit box now. i am shaking 'cause i’m so scared 😄
*back to osamu*
Osamu: it’s probably gonna say something that doesn’t sound like any words any human's ever spoken.
*back to atsumu*
(spirit box blares)
Spirit box: "do it"
Atsumu: oh shit!
*back to osamu*
Osamu: he'll probably respond to it like he's sitting across the table from a friend, playing scrabble.
*back to atsumu*
Atsumu: did you say ‘do it’ or 'tsumu?
«────── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ──────»
Sugawara: old timey jails, very fun to visit... and that’s all i’ve got to say about that *sips coffee*
Asahi: (chuckles) nothing about the ghouls?
Sugawara: there will be no ghouls, there will be dust, there will be noises that you, you know, pee your pants over.
«────── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ──────»
(bang)
Matsukawa: oh?
Hanamaki: ooh, a nice little drum hit.
Matsukawa: yeah, we got a beatboxing demon in here?
(bang)
Hanamaki: oh, shit, another one!
Matsukawa: *starts beatboxing*
Hanamaki: 🎶 my name is makki and i’m here to say. we’re the baddest ghost hunters in the usa. hunting demons and ghouls too 🎶
(unintelligible sound from the spirit box)
Hanamaki: what?
Matsukawa: *beatboxing*
Hanamaki: wait, hold on, we actually got a response!
Matsukawa: *still beatboxing*
Hanamaki: stop beatboxing! (laughing)
Matsukawa: huh, oh, sorry.
«────── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ──────»
Koganegawa: *whispering* choo choo pickle pie.
Futakuchi: (wheeze) choo choo pickle pie, what the f--?
Koganegawa: i don’t know. i’m just thinking of a funny thing a ghost could whisper
Futakuchi: (wheeze)
«────── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ──────»
Tendou: and by the way, if you want a little more one-on-one time with the tsutomu here, he'll be here alone soon enough.
Goshiki: …
Tendou: *backing away while keeping eye contact with goshiki *
Goshiki: it’s a long way to back out. you gonna keep that speed going?
Tendou: is the door behind me?
Goshiki: it’s close.
Tendou: *still backing away but carefully trying to avoid the door without looking behind him and eye contact still on goshiki*
Goshiki: did that work out the way you wanted?
Tendou: *still backing away*
«────── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ──────»
Kageyama: you gonna sit in that chair? we’re not allowed to.
Hinata: oh, yeah.
Kageyama: but we are the internet's paranormal bad boys.
Hinata: (chuckle) that’s right, were controversial.
Kageyama: we’re planning cheek to chair, baby. you ain’t gonna stop me.
Hinata: i’m sitting in that thing bare ass.
Kageyama: i’m gonna give that thing a high-five with my butt cheeks.
*later at the location*
Kageyama: yeah, not gonna happen, i’m not sitting on that.
Hinata: that looks like a death trap.
«────── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ──────»
Shirabu: the human mind, if it’s looking for something, it'll find something. and he's going to find something. and it will destroy him.
*meawhile*
Goshiki: holy shit. it felt like something walked past me twice, one from the right side, once on the left side.
«────── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ──────»
Akaashi: it’s gone quiet now and i’m afraid he’s dead.
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TAG LIST
@halesandy @lina @babyshoyo @midnightsun30 @polaris-song @kac-chowsballs @sugawaraaaa
just answer this form to be added to my tag list!
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sorryimananti-romantic · 3 years ago
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Mist | Choi San | Chapter 4
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Pairing: Choi San x OC (Seohyun)
Genre: supernatural (ghost), romance, high school
Trigger Warnings: paranormal, death mentions, violence
Words: 6.6k
Disclaimer: I do not own anything except my original character and the story. I do not own any gifs or pictures used.
Full story on Wattpad (don’t spoil here if you read there too)
chapter directory
--------------
Seohyun was waiting for Jiwoo for quite a while now, sitting on the desk in her room, doodling in her notebook. She sighed as she shut it, a bit frustrated. It was not like Jiwoo to leave her hanging.
Seohyun considered going out; it was highly likely that Jiwoo was at their usual spot- the park near the school, her home, or the accident site. It was about 10 pm. Wasn't that late, was it? She got up, but stopped.
Maybe Jiwoo needed space.
It was probably this, but Seohyun couldn't help fearing that she had just moved on. If she'd gotten her memories back, that could mean that she was a whole different person now. She might not be the Jiwoo she knew anymore.
Seohyun fell on her bed, staring at the wall, and suddenly felt goosebumps.
"Took you long enough," Seohyun said, not bothering to look at Jiwoo, who had just entered the room.
"Don't tell me you were waiting for me," Jiwoo smirked.
"Oh, why would I?" Seohyun smirked back, and made space for Jiwoo, who sat on the bed with her. "So?"
"So, my dear friend," Jiwoo began, clearly excited to tell her her life story.
And she did. She was Ahn Jiwoo, daughter to two loving parents and a sister to a 16 year old brother. She'd had a pretty normal life; her father was a finance manager and her mother a housewife, and she had a lot of friends during her school years too. The rumours about her father being some sort of criminal were wrong; she had to face those rumours in her life too. They had her confused with another Jiwoo in her class.
"So we were a group of four friends; 2 boys and 2 girls. I was kind of a rebel in my last few months of life, because I just found life boring. I wanted an adventure. Something new. I wanted to travel too. So I was suggesting to my friends that we should do something. They were all busy in their own ways, and I didn't understand. I kept bugging them. So when we were in that restaurant, we had an argument. I knew it was my fault. I stormed off, and I was just about to go back when I got hit by a car."
"Oh... so then you went to the hospital, and they found out you lost your memories?"
"Right," she said, "But I was already in a critical condition. Brain damage led me to death."
"Ah..." Seohyun stared at her. Jiwoo's eyes were sad as she told her this, but she looked content. "So the reason you stayed..."
"The reason I stayed was not one, but two. I wanted to make sure my friends didn't blame themselves and my parents had moved on. And I spent the whole day making sure that was the case."
"And the other reason?"
"I want an adventure," she said and smiled brightly.
"Ugh, you ghosts! You stay for the most stupid reasons!" Seohyun mocked and dramatically threw her head in her hands, which made Jiwoo hit her with a pillow until she was laughing.
"That's my last wish, Seohyun. You think you could do that for me? Go on an adventure with me?"
"Haven't you had enough of adventure though? I mean, living with me is an adventure in itself-"
"I already talked to San," Jiwoo said, catching her attention. "He actually thought it was a nice idea. So we're going on an adventure this week. He said he'll make it a surprise for me."
"Hey, hey, that's not fair? You didn't even ask me!"
"I didn't have to," Jiwoo flipped her red hair.
------------
"I don't know why I ever agreed to this," Seohyun sighed, handing her bag to Wooyoung who put it with the other few bags.
"Stop being a boomer and get in," Wooyoung said, and Seohyun did, muttering how she should have never suggested this.
"Should've thought before you planned all of it," Jongho snickered and Seohyun shot a glare.
"Everybody's in?" Hongjoong asked and they looked at each other, shouting a yes. Hongjoong gave a thumbs up and took the front seat of the van after shutting the door.
Everyone, including Jiwoo, who couldn't stop smiling, were seated. Seohyun had asked her mom to lend her a van that could fit 10 people, and though her mom had raised her brows in question, she had agreed when Seohyun said it was a trip with friends. She had just been surprised she had friends that were not ghosts, so without further questions (quite conveniently) she agreed, on the condition that the driver would be someone from the company.
She did raise a question when she found out that she was the only girl in the whole group, and there were only 9 people. Seohyun finally told her she was doing a favour for a ghost who had saved her life, and her mother made her promise she'd tell her the story someday.
They were going to Muchangpo Beach. They decided they'd see the sunset there. It was close to Seoul and the only place they could afford to travel and have an 'adventure'. They'd have a fun time, the boys promised, saying everything was fun when they were together.
Jiwoo was sitting between San and Wooyoung, and the three of them were chatting. Seohyun smiled when she saw that San was her voice; he'd say whatever she had to say.
She herself was in the middle row with Seonghwa and Yeosang by her sides. The two of them were also half bent backwards, listening to whatever the three of them were talking about. Seohyun had plugged her earphones in but she wasn't playing any music yet. She just listened to them talk.
"Tell us something about Seohyun," Wooyoung asked, giggling. Seohyun smiled inwardly.
"Well, Seohyun," Jiwoo thought, "she's quite rude, isn't she?"
"She's quite rude, isn't she?" San did his job, and the five of them laughed.
"She's not that rude,~" Seonghwa casted a glance at her, sighing in relief when he thought she couldn't hear him. Seohyun bit her cheek from the inside to stop smiling.
"She's scared of crows, of all thing," Jiwoo revealed, and the boys laughed a little. "She'll never show it, but when more than three crows are around, she runs for her life."
"Ah, I haven't ever noticed," Yeosang said, rubbing his chin, "she can hide it really well."
"Tell us some ghost story," Wooyoung asked. He was clearly enjoying this.
"I have a good one!" Jiwoo exclaimed and everyone seemed to scoot closer. "There was once a boy about her age who had the most stupid reason to not move on."
San almost stopped as he narrowed his eyes at Jiwoo and she assured him it was not Joon Hyuk. So San told the boys, and asked them to guess.
"He wanted an adventure too?" Yeosang laughed.
Jiwoo pouted, but said it could fall in that category, but it was a different sort of adventure. She told them to let their imagination run wild.
As San told the boys, Seohyun decided this was her cue to interrupt. "We are NOT going to talk about that!"
Wooyoung screamed a little in surprise. "Weren't you listening to music?!"
Jiwoo was just laughing and Seohyun bared her teeth at her, making everyone laugh and wonder just what sort of adventure did the boy want. After a hundred pleads from the boys, Seohyun finally told them that it didn't actually happen; she just threatened the ghost in unimaginable ways, making him move on without his desire.
"I think I have an idea of what happened," Yeosang thought, amusement in his eyes, "But I am too afraid to voice it out."
"I think you got it then," Seohyun nodded in approval and Yeosang gaped at her.
"You got it tough, friend," he said, patting her shoulder to comfort her. San and Wooyoung were pouting very loudly, and Seonghwa just stared at Yeosang and Seohyun as understanding passed between them.
"You both are so weird," Seonghwa finally said.
"If I tell you, Seonghwa, you'll drown in shame. Better protect your ears and your pure mind," Seohyun grinned.
San and Wooyoung exchanged glances, frowning, but they shook their head. It couldn't be that bad. Could it?
Seohyun plugged her earphones again, deciding she'd take a nap and actually played music this time.
-----------
"We're here!"
Seonghwa shook her awake, and Seohyun slowly opened her eyes, her hand going in front of her eyes as she blocked the sunlight. She took off her earphones and the sound of waves hit her, making her smile. She adjusted her green dress that reached below her knees, and put her hat on.
She saw that Jiwoo was already out, running along the beach, and San was watching her with a smile on his face. He turned back, meeting eyes with Seohyun, who suddenly felt out of breath.
San was handsome- painfully handsome. And the plain white shirt he wore didn't help. His hair was flying due to the breeze and he ran a hand through them, cocking his head to the side as he watched her.
The sun making his skin glow didn't help either.
Seohyun cleared her throat and joined him, and they both watched Jiwoo, in her jeans and green T shirt that she had died in- her permanent outfit, running as freely as she could, her red hair flowing behind her, her laugh ringing in the air.
"I didn't know she'd be that happy to see the beach. Hasn't she been here before?" Seohyun asked.
"I think she has. She knew the way. And I'm almost suspicious she's doing this just to annoy you," San answered.
As if on cue, Jiwoo stopped, doing a weird dance, then started twerking-
"And that's our cue to look away," Seohyun grabbed San, now laughing, by his arm and went to join the others. "They didn't have to come. They can't see her."
"We figured out a way to enjoy with her even if we can't see her," San smirked.
And that was how, a few moments later, they all were assembled in a circle playing cards.
"Why do I think San and Seohyun are cheating on us with Jiwoo?" Yunho looked at them suspiciously.
"How do you think the cards are in the air?" Seohyun asked, and Yunho grinned. She had a point. To anyone who could not see Jiwoo, it would look like a bunch of cards were in the air.
"I WON!" Jiwoo smacked the final card and jumped in the air. Seohyun gaped at her.
"You cheated!" She shouted.
"I was sitting with you the whole time, don't give me that shit," Jiwoo smirked.
San told them that she had, indeed, won without cheating and everybody groaned. Mingi dragged the food basket and him and Jongho started spreading the food.
"Can she really not eat?" Jongho asked.
"I'm afraid not," Seohyun answered.
"Isn't it rude to eat in front of a ghost?" Jiwoo put her hands on her hip and Seohyun popped a cherry in her mouth, saying, "It is."
San scoffed. Jiwoo kicked Seohyun's leg lightly and said she was going to walk. The rest of them started to eat.
"I heard the sunset here is very pretty," Seonghwa said.
"I've been here before," Mingi took a bite of his sandwich, "It really is the prettiest."
After eating a little, Seohyun looked in the distance where Jiwoo was standing near the shore, the waves flowing near her. Jiwoo looked back and started walking towards them, then stopped halfway and gestured at them to come.
"She's calling us," San said, and they all got up, joining Jiwoo.
"I want to play in the water," Jiwoo said.
"What's stopping you?" Seohyun asked.
"With you all, you dumbass," Jiwoo laughed and took her hand, leading her to the shore.
"Hey, hey, easy there," Seohyun laughed and let out a little yelp as the waves hit her bare feet. "The water is so cold!"
Jiwoo bent down and sprayed the water on Seohyun, smirking.
"Oh no, you did not!" Seohyun bent down and sprayed back before she could run. And so started a battle of getting each other wet. They all forgot all their worries for a while, running around in the waves, laughing as loudly as they could, laughing even louder when one of them got Jiwoo. By the time it got darker, they were all quite wet.
Yunho and Yeosang ran back to get towels for everyone, throwing them one each, and wondering if Jiwoo should have a towel. Seohyun said there was no need, but Jiwoo snatched hers once she was done.
"The sunset's here, guys," Yeosang said.
They all stood silently, side by side, watching the sky change to brilliant shades of candy, the sun reflecting on the sea. It was breathtakingly beautiful. At some point, Jiwoo crossed her hand with Seohyun's, and she turned to look at her face. Her red hair shone brightly and her eyes were wet.
"I want it to be the last thing that I see before I go," Jiwoo almost whispered. Seohyun's heart sank in her knees. It was really happening.
Jiwoo looked at San and smiled widely, San smiled back and waved at her. Jiwoo asked him to tell everyone that she was thanking them for doing so much for her. They all assured her it was nothing, and said they were gonna miss her.
San looked at Seohyun, nodding and urged the others to come with him. Only Jiwoo and Seohyun remained now, facing the sunset.
"It's really happening," Jiwoo finally said. A cry of pain escaped Seohyun's mouth. She couldn't take it anymore. Jiwoo rubbed her hand comfortingly, making her face herself. "You've given me an adventure. The time I spent with you, that was enough. Today was for you, Seohyun."
"Are you serious?" Seohyun asked.
Jiwoo nodded. "I told everyone it was for me, but no. It was for you. A gift for helping me out so much. For being a friend. A little sister that I always wanted."
Seohyun smiled sadly, "I'm gonna miss you so, so much. I got used to you, I shouldn't have."
"I know," Jiwoo smiled, kissing her forehead and wrapping her in a hug. Seohyun closed her eyes and inhaled. "Don't cry on me right now, Seohyun."
Seohyun laughed a little. "I'm trying not to, you're making it harder by reminding me!" She opened her eyes and saw the boys, watching them from a distance.
"I hope you'll open your heart more, Seohyun. That's my last wish. You had a tough life, but you have so many people, dead and alive, who love you. I hope you remember that, always."
"Unnie..." A tear escaped Seohyun.
Jiwoo watched the sunset, Seohyun in her arms, and it was perfect.
She closed her eyes.
----------------
Seohyun felt it, felt her presence fade away. She was no longer hugging Jiwoo. She stood for a few seconds before finally collapsing on the sand and she shuddered as tears began to flow. She put her face in her hands and cried her heart out.
The boys approached her, sitting around her, rubbing her back, telling her that it was okay. She just cried and cried, and she knew she was letting go of Joon Hyuk along with Jiwoo too. The proper goodbye that she had so badly wanted, she finally got it.
San put her arms around her and brought her closer, caressing her hair. After a few minutes, she was out of tears. She let her hair cover her face as she rested her head on San's shoulder, trying to normalize her breath.
Jongho handed her a water bottle. She managed a smile and took a few sips, rubbing her eyes. The boys looked at each other. They weren't sure what they should do next.
"God damn me if I ever befriend a ghost again," Seohyun said and finally laughed, making everyone else laugh along.
"Are you okay?" Hongjoong asked.
"Yes, I am, actually," she said, wiping her eyes again. "I'm done crying for a while now." Her eyes went to San, who understood and smiled.
"Alright, let's get some dinner."
-----------
The driver had dropped Seohyun home now, and was on the way to drop the rest of them. As Seohyun entered her home, it felt strange. She felt utterly alone now that she knew Jiwoo wasn't gonna be back ever.
She tried to recall the time, only a few months ago, when she hadn't met Jiwoo yet. What did she even do in her spare time? She could not remember.
Seohyun went in her room and changed into her PJs first. After she combed her hair and scrolled a bit, she got up to turn off the light and saw something lying on her desk.
It was a painting. Of Jiwoo and her, cheek to cheek, smiling, the black cat in their arms. Seohyun gasped a little and examined it. It was really well drawn. Who made it?
She turned the page and saw something written on the back of it:
Seohyun,
I remember now that I loved painting. Since we don't have any photos, I captured us in this painting. Now you have a photo!
Love always, Jiwoo unnie ^^
Seohyun laughed a little as she read how she had addressed herself. "I guess you really liked being called unnie," she thought out loud.
She set the painting on her bookshelf. After being content with its position, she turned off the light, and slept surprisingly peacefully throughout the night.
------------
"I swear to god if you don't make fun of me when I do something stupid, I'm never gonna talk to you all again."
"Well, that's new," Yeosang commented, "You're begging for it now."
"Better that then you all being like this!" Seohyun let out a frustrated sigh.
The boys were being ridiculously sensitive with Seohyun, and she was feeling absolutely uncomfortable. She hadn't noticed it the first two days, but then she noticed in the little things; how they'd always offer her food before eating themselves, how they'd always accompany her, etc. She had enough of the special treatment.
"You're acting like someone died," Seohyun said.
"Back at it with the dead jokes are you?" San shook his head.
"Technically, Jiwoo was dead," Jongho remarked.
"So did she die twice then?" Mingi wondered.
"Oh please," Seohyun sighed again, "I just want you all to act like we used to. No more special treatment. Please, this makes it worse. I'm already at terms with Jiwoo going. It was bound to happen."
"Alright, alright," Seonghwa said and shushed her. "We didn't know what else we could do. Back to normal, okay?"
"Thank you," Seohyun truly meant it. "Also, I think I'm ready to share my drums." The boys hooted except one.
"Are you angry?" Mingi asked. Seohyun immediately turned to San, who was suddenly interested in Wooyoung's fingernails.
"Now I am," Seohyun muttered, and San smiled without meeting her eyes. The teacher came and interrupted their session, so they went back to studying.
After school was over, the boys decided to go to their warehouse, while Seohyun asked if anyone would help her bring the drums. San volunteered and they walked to her home, the black cat in San's hand.
As they walked, talking about how it looked like the cat missed Jiwoo, San stopped in his tracks. "I think you have a guest."
Seohyun looked ahead and saw a middle aged man dressed like a doctor. He was a ghost. Seohyun shared a look with San and went ahead.
"How can I help you?" Seohyun asked. The ghost got startled when he saw that San could see him too.
Jiwoo had once explained that to ghosts, Seohyun shined a little brighter than the rest of the humans, which was how they knew. Seohyun had just thought she was crazy but now she realized, now that she was with San, that it must be true.
Or maybe Jiwoo hadn't been joking that one time when she said there was a banner on top of her head and every ghost could see it, only Seohyun couldn't.
"I was told you'd help me," the doctor said. Seohyun nodded and he continued. "I made a mistake. I operated on a patient and it went wrong. It was my fault. The patient lost his vision. They were going to sue me, but when I tried to settle it, we had an argument. They gave up on suing me, saying I wasn't even worth the trouble.
"It was a few days later. I went into a slump and started drinking a lot. I was on the roof of the hospital and it wasn't my intention, but I slipped. That's how I died."
"I'm sorry to hear that," Seohyun said, "How can I help you move on then?"
"I want to let the patient know that I truly am sorry, and I want to let my family, just my family know that it wasn't a suicide. I wouldn't leave them behind on purpose."
"But... isn't it easier for your family this way? Than knowing that you are now a ghost? That it wasn't an accident?"
"I think," San began, "that he's right. It's more easier for them if they know he didn't commit suicide. They'd feel really bad if they think he left them on purpose. No one wants that from the people they love."
The doctor smiled thankfully at San. "I'll take you to the patient first," he said and asked if he should teleport the two of them.
"Do you want to come? You don't have to," Seohyun said.
San stroked the cat's head. "I want to."
"I don't know if it's safe for San to teleport. So we'll take the mundane route. Lead the way, sir."
"It's quite a distance. I hope you have money for taxi," the doctor said.
On the way to the patient's house, they had a nice chat with the doctor. He told them about his life, back when he was famous for being a good surgeon. He had never made a mistake and he had always held pride in that. But with this particular patient, he took a risk he knew he shouldn't have.
He told them he had a 10 year old daughter and he wanted her to become a doctor too. He wanted her to know that it was good to save people, and she shouldn't be afraid to take risks but also be careful at the same time and know her limits.
Seohyun was actually touched by the whole thing. It was good to have ghosts like these once in a while; nice, well-mannered ghosts.
They reached the patient's house. It was in a posh area; the patient himself must be rich. The house looked more like a mansion from the outside. Upon ringing the doorbell, a woman appeared, who the doctor told them was his wife. She seemed to be past 50s.
"We're relatives of Dr. Lee, the one who operated on your husband. We're here to discuss things about the case."
The woman passed them a skeptical look, "The doctor passed away, didn't he? We gave up on the case altogether. What do you want now?"
"We just want to talk to Mr. Cho. It's important. Please."
The woman let them in, guided them to the chairs in the garden and said she'd bring her husband. San and her sat down, admiring the lush gardens. The doctor paced worriedly.
"It will be alright. I have a way with words," Seohyun assured the doctor.
The husband and wife arrived; San and Seohyun got up and greeted them respectfully. "I am Seohyun, Dr. Lee's distant relative. This is San, my cousin."
"Have a seat," he said and they all settled down, including the wife. Seohyun sighed and decided she'd get to the point.
"Dr. Lee made a mistake. You must know that," Seohyun said. The wife looked at her husband worriedly.
"So he says," Mr. Cho said, staring in the distance.
"He wants to apologize, sincerely. I'll get to the point. He's here right now. I can see ghosts, the dead who have not moved on. He had unfinished business here, because he wanted to sincerely apologize. He won't be able to move on until he hears your forgiveness."
"Is this a prank?" Mrs. Cho asked, but Mr. Cho shushed her.
"I hope you can prove he's here," Mr. Cho said.
"Dr. Lee told you about some ginseng plant right before you went under anesthesia. No one was there when he told you, right?"
"That's true," Mr. Cho smiled. His wife began to complain but he raised a hand. "That's interesting. My father had a friend. He could see ghosts too. Are you the Mediator?"
San and Seohyun looked at each other in surprise. "That's what they call me, yes."
Mr. Cho laughed a little. "I used to not believe my father and that friend of his for the longest time, until I saw something and couldn't believe my eyes. That's why I believe you too, girl. You're doing a good job."
"Thank you," Seohyun said.
"So Dr. Lee is here? I can speak directly to him?"
"Yes sir."
"Alright. Dr. Lee, it was your fault, I know. But I truly forgive you. There are things we cannot avoid. We call it fate or destiny. What's bound to happen, fortune or misfortune, happens and you cannot avoid it. That's what I believe. I want you to move on, without the burden of my accident holding you back. You didn't do it on purpose, and that is enough for me."
Tears escaped Mrs. Cho's eyes and she wiped them. Seohyun muttered to San, 'wise man', and they watched Dr. Lee's eyes shine with tears to as he said his apology and thanks. Seohyun conveyed the message.
They were offered tea, but Seohyun told them they had to get home. The man offered to help Seohyun out if she ever had trouble with this Mediator job. She accepted, saying she would pay a visit someday.
The three of them left the house, standing in the street and reflecting on what had happened.
"That went rather smoothly," Seohyun commented.
"I know!" San widened his eyes at her.
"Thank you, Seohyun. It really does feel like a burden off my shoulder."
"No problem, we should move now. What's the next job?"
"I don't think I can see them like this," the doctor said. "I love my daughter and my wife very much. Seeing them would want me to stay. Do you think I can write a letter to my wife? You can give it to her tomorrow."
"Will your wife believe that it was really written by you?"
"We had a secret code between us; we created it. If I mention it in the letter, she'll have to believe it. And she'll recognize my handwriting too."
San and Seohyun decided that was convenient, and Seohyun handed the doctor a pen and paper. He wrote a short one, muttering something about how the less he wrote the better it would be. Then he folded it and handed it to Seohyun.
"I trust you. You'll give the letter tomorrow, right? I wrote the address on the other page."
"I will deliver it personally."
"Thank you," the doctor smiled. "Do you think I'll be able to watch over my daughter?"
"Maybe you will," Seohyun said.
"Guardian angel," San added, making the doctor smile as he disappeared. He had moved on.
"Well," Seohyun said, "That was quick. I love it when ghosts are wise enough to actually know how to handle their mess."
San scoffed. "Let's go."
-------------
Grabbing some coffee from a café they passed by, they took a taxi to Seohyun's home. Seohyun insisted that they should eat before they packed the drums and go to the warehouse. San helped her set the table. She had made pasta last night, which she reheated, and had some chocolates for dessert.
"Does your mom ever come home?" San asked as he nibbled on the chocolate.
Seohyun yawned. San reflected. They both were tired and sleepy now. "She has an apartment near her office so she only comes once a week here."
San yawned again and Seohyun laughed. "Should I let you nap?"
San smiled lazily. "Let's just pack the drums while you're still angry. I don't want you to change your mind."
Seohyun threw the wrapper at him and he caught it before it hit his face, throwing it right back. She dodged it. "Come on, let's dismantle it."
It took them ten minutes to dismantle and pack the drums. But it was already night time, and the boys had locked the warehouse and gone home when San asked them.
"Well, I'll call them here tomorrow. They should take it if they want it so much."
"Good idea." San said, yawning again.
"I think if I let you go home now, you're gonna fall asleep in the middle of the road. Take a power nap, San."
"Oh no, I shouldn't. I'll just go," he said and walked past her, only to be grabbed by the arms and led to a room despite him insisting he was not THAT sleepy.
San entered the room and immediately knew it was Seohyun's. The potted plants, the books, the mess. And the painting.
"So that's the painting, eh," he said, walking towards it and looking at the detail, absolutely wowed by it.
"How do you know? I don't think I mentioned," Seohyun narrowed her eyes.
"Jiwoo told me she left a gift for you," he smiled. Seohyun went to stand with him, looking at the painting with him.
"She's really good," she said.
San looked down at her. She felt so small; he was about a head taller than her. He turned towards her, his hand going to play with her hair. "You're really okay, right?"
"I am, San," Seohyun assured him. "I do feel lonely when I'm home, but you guys make up for it everyday."
San nodded. He was still playing with her hair. Seohyun suddenly flushed; they were standing quite close to each other. San noticed her looking at him, her light brown eyes shining.
He seemed to be searching her eyes for something. And Seohyun wasn't sure what it was, but she felt her heart pumping louder every second. She was, oh god, she was so attracted to him. He made her feel so many things just by looking at her.
"What are you looking at?" Seohyun asked- almost whispered.
"You," San said, bringing his hand to cup her face, surprised when she leaned in to his touch and closed her eyes. It made him melt. He brought her in for a hug and she gladly wrapped her arms around his waist, his small waist. She could hear his heart beat just as loudly. San rested his face on her head, rocking them back and forth. He didn't want to let go, he wanted to stay like this as long as he could.
Seohyun sighed. All she could think about was how he felt. Her mind was truly blank.
San finally broke apart a little, Seohyun's arms still around his waist. He was staring at her, his hands cupping her face, putting stray hair behind her ears. Seohyun wanted to do the same to him, but at the same time she didn't want to let go of him.
"Seohyun, Seohyun," he whispered, loving the sound of her name on his lips. She bit her lip. It seemed like they just stared at each other for the longest time, afraid to say anything, until Seohyun smiled at the situation.
San kissed her forehead first, a light peck. When she didn't move away, he tilted her face a bit upwards to kiss her cheekbone, then her cheek, leaving butterfly kisses, making her tremble all over. She clenched his shirt tighter, out of breath already. Their noses brushed and she loved the feeling of it, his breath warm on her. And when their lips brushed, San finally kissed her properly.
And Seohyun's mind went blank.
San's hand went behind her neck and Seohyun finally left his waist, only to cup his face herself as she guided him along. They tasted chocolate on each other. Seohyun was deepening the kiss, she just couldn't get enough. San mirrored her movements, following along, making her bend backwards until her back hit the desk and her hand went to rest on it for support.
San broke apart to catch his breath. His eyes were glazed, and so were Seohyun's. He put his hand on Seohyun's, the one that was on the desk, and with a sultry look and half a smile, he kissed her again, so passionately that it made Seohyun curve back and back until San was half on top of her.
When they broke apart, finally short of breath, Seohyun smirked. "I thought you were sleepy."
"I still am," he said, resting her forehead against her and smiling, eyes shut.
Seohyun lead him to her bed, making him sit. She bit her lip and smirked as she positioned herself on San's lap. San held her by her waist and let her kiss him; on his cheeks, like he had done, a peck on his nose which made him laugh, and finally a kiss to the lips.
"God, the way you make me feel, Choi San!" She sighed dramatically.
"And how do I make you feel?" He questioned. Seohyun shook her head. "I'll tell you later. Now we sleep."
San set his alarm for a power nap and with Seohyun in her arms, they both slept peacefully. When the alarm did go off, Seohyun didn't budge. With a kiss on her forehead, he left the house.
----------
"There's something wrong with Seohyun," Yeosang announced and everyone turned to look at him.
"There's more?" Wooyoung asked sarcastically and Seohyun glared at him, turning to look at Yeosang, asking him what he meant by that.
"I don't know," Yeosang threw his hands in the air, clearly frustrated, "She keeps smiling to herself. It's creepy."
Seohyun and San shared a look and San, despite his struggle not to, burst out laughing. Seohyun pursed her lips, trying not to smile but failed.
"See?" Yeosang pointed at her, "Has she ever smiled like this?"
Wooyoung was looking at San and Seohyun. "You both.... Is there a secret I don't know about!?"
"I don't have secrets anymore..." Seohyun lied shamelessly, shrugging. San put his hands in the air and said, "I only laughed because of what Yeosang said."
"No, you're looking at each other with the most disgusting look in your eyes," Yeosang observed, "Don't tell me you two..."
"Ah, no, that cannot have happened!" Hongjoong waved him off as Seonghwa gasped.
"How could you even suggest such a thing?" Seonghwa shook his head, clearly disappointed in Yeosang.
"No, I didn't even say anything yet..." Yeosang looked at Seohyun to apologize but she smirked at him, making his eyes go wide.
"I am RIGHT! Something happened between these two, she smirked at me!"
Seohyun immediately put her poker face and looked at Mingi and Jongho, who were right in front of her, with the most innocent look in her eyes. "Did you see me smirk?"
Mingi and Jongho shook their heads. Yeosang shot Seohyun a glare. "I know I'm right. If this turns out to be true..."
"Stop being so dramatic," San said, shushing Yeosang, and got up to drink water.
They were all in the warehouse, having just left school, and were currently relaxing and drinking juice, chatting with each other. Yeosang had noticed Seohyun smiling more than usual, which made him think something happened. It didn't help that San and Seohyun couldn't stop exchanging glances.
Seohyun had brought the drum set with Yunho before coming to the warehouse. Seohyun motioned to Mingi and they got up, leaving the rest behind.
"Have you ever played drums before? Like, actual drums?"
"Yeah," Mingi answered, "A friend of mine had them."
"Alright, you should learn how to arrange them."
So Seohyun taught Mingi all about the components of a drum set, their various uses and how to dismantle them and put them back. Mingi listened carefully, and Seohyun smiled inwardly at how happy he looked. It made her feel guilty that she delayed it so much.
When they were done, they stood back to have a look.
"A much needed upgrade," Mingi smiled, ruffling Seohyun's hair, "Thanks."
"This drum set is my baby, okay? Use it well."
"Yes ma'am," Mingi saluted and Seohyun pointed at the drums. "Have a go."
Mingi sat on the stool, testing the weight of the drum sticks in his hand. He tested the sounds then, and played a little, freestyling, laughing as he did. The others had come to watch him, cheering and hyping him up.
"Not bad," Seohyun said when he finished, "Just go with your heart. Don't think."
"Your turn," Mingi handed her the drum sticks and she almost panicked.
"I think I'm good," she hesitated but someone pushed her forward. It was Yunho.
"I didn't go through all that trouble of coming to your house and carrying the drums to not see you play," he shook his head.
"Alright. Just a second," Seohyun said, tying her hair in a ponytail. "There you go."
Everyone hooted, clearly excited. This was the first time she was going to actually play in front of them, save for the time she had played the violin for San. San smiled at her as if he was thinking the same thing. Seohyun inhaled, testing the drums, and began.
She realized she really did enjoy playing the drums; there was just something about drums where you could express freely, and loudly, as if you wanted everyone to hear it. And it made her smile like crazy, put her brain on pause for a while and play with her heart.
She played like crazy, and when she was done, everyone was in awe.
"You're actually very good!" Hongjoong said, finally clapping. Seohyun bowed her head and got up. "I didn't expect this."
"It's like she was a different person," Jongho was looking at her with wonder.
"Teacher! you're my teacher from today," Mingi declared, and Seohyun scoffed at him.
"You don't need a teacher, teach yourself. I know you can."
"Nooo~" he wailed, "I would love you as a teacher!"
Seohyun just waved him off, going to San and smiling embarrassingly at him. He pinched her cheeks and she pouted, the two of them forgetting for a moment that everyone was still watching her.
"You two... there is something different!" Jongho laughed in disbelief. San and Seohyun started laughing. Yeosang just shook hands with Jongho, thanking him for finally noticing.
"They're not even bothering to deny it, guys," Yunho grinned.
"San is mine!" Wooyoung shouted dramatically, coming to hug San, sticking his tongue out at Seohyun. Seohyun glared at him, baring her teeth at him, and snatched San from him. Wooyoung gasped, and suddenly the two of them were in a battle, both pulling at San by his arms, who was laughing painfully, shouting for help.
"He's not even choosing!" Seohyun laughed, and winked at Wooyoung as she said, "Let's ditch him."
Wooyoung pushed San away, rather forcefully, who fell in Yeosang's arms. He put his arm in Seohyun and she flipped her hair as they walked away from him.
"No one loves me," San buried his nose in Yeosang's neck, pouting. Yeosang sighed, patting his head.
"You're right," Yeosang said, "Absolutely right."
"Hey..." San moaned like a little kid.
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katsukikitten · 4 years ago
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☆ Fluffy, fuzzy warmth - 1k words comments are appreciated
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The punch hits the back of your throat giving you a bitter aftertaste having the opposite effect of quenching your thirst. Your eyes fall over the amassed bodies of the Pro-hero agency holiday party, it looked anything but fun. If anything you would use the word boring to describe the sad scene before you. 
Yawns escape mouths as people mingle outside of their usual cliques only to return to their patrol partners again. Everyone holding a cup of punch but nobody drinking it. You stare down into your own wishing someone has spiked the green liquid. 
"Bunch of stiffs am I right?" You say to your new patrol partner, someone who blended in well in this crowd. His two toned eyes slide to you in your fiery red dress before looking back into the crowd. 
Per the usual he says nothing and you sigh, holding up your full cup for emphasis. 
"I'm going to get more punch." But really that was code for 'I'm planning to get lost' not that he would read between the lines or that he even knew how. You had to admit one thing about the Todoroki man though,  he did know how to use his quirk and despite being so aloof he cleaned up nicely. Muscles sitting snugly in a starched white shirt and black vest. His white and red hair pushed back for once allowing for his sapphire and smoky quartz eye to be seen. You turn away from him and the throngs of murmuring people to look over the sad hors d'oeuvre table, really it was just cheese and crackers. 
Your eyes wander to the street below before going to the horizon of the skyline, the hotel sat on the fringes of the city and just a few blocks away was the start of the suburbs. Flickering lights catch your eye as snow blankets the city, an idea begins to form in your head. 
"Hey." You elbow Todoroki who looks down on you with an icy stare, "Let's ditch." 
"But the director hasn't come out yet." His voice is monotone as you wrap your arms around his bulky bicep. 
"Yea...but this is cooler. We see him almost everyday." You say pulling at the ox, he sighs allowing you to guide him out of the rented ballroom. Mindlessly following you until you hit the street. A guest of cold air rushes through the city streets sending a shiver down your spine. 
"Where are we going?" He asks, allowing you to cling to his left side as you guide him. 
"Light looking!" You exclaim while he gives you a confused look. His eyes instinctively darting to street lights.
"But we see the street lamps every day." He says confused and the look of bewilderment on his face causes you to laugh. It rings out in the quiet city streets, your laugh rings in Todoroki's stomach. He swallows thickly. 
"No, silly. Christmas light looking! You know where you walk around looking at people's decorations!" Excitement dances in your eyes as snow collects in your hair and onto the shoulders of your thin jacket. 
"I've never been light looking before." He admits, eyes glued to you. You try to keep the pity off of your face as you think of the rumors of the freshly transferred top hero. 
"He was bred to be a weapon."
And it showed now as it did in his everyday actions. In his monotone, apathetic actions as if he doesn't allow himself even an iota of emotion. Subconsciously you vowed to make this a night to remember, naturally allowing the joy to seep into your voice. 
"Then let's get started!" You pull at him, briskly walking the few blocks it takes to get to the nearest neighborhood. Even in that time in between shop windows were outlined in warm white or multicolored lights with trees of various sizes twinkling behind the glass. Each pane reflecting the same image, you wearing a bright smile and a dazzling dress hidden beneath a company jacket and himself wearing his suit and a look of confusion. 
Abruptly you stop in your tracks, taking a moment to catalog the streets and advise a plan to see the best lights while Todoroki soaks up the sights like a sponge. 
"This way!" You announce, allowing your hand to fall from his wrist and into his hand. Pulling at his fingers as you guided a helpless man through the dazzling darkness. Your trout slows to a stroll as before you're standing beside him, gently dropping his hand to cross your arms for warmth. Suddenly Todoroki's left hand had never felt so cold. His eyes stare down at you before you point to the first house. 
"Oh I love these blow ups. Look Santa is in a UFO on the roof!" You announce as heterochromatic eyes follow your finger. Sure enough the house has a spaceship atop its shingles as the roof line is defined by warm white lights. His eyes follow the length of the house until you point out the next. 
This goes on for a block before Todoroki finally catches onto the chattering of your teeth, still you're smiling through the chill in the air. Before he can suggest going back something grabs your attention as your hand absentmindedly latches onto his. Rushing to the flashing lights that seem to go to a silent tune. As the two of you approach the house you see a small sign by the front of the yard giving you a radio station the lights are illuminating to. 
"Oh, oh let me see your phone please, I think I left mine." You say impatiently fumbling with the pockets on his left side before he produces the phone from his right. You take it from his hands as politely as an excited person can before you find the radio station's website, a familiar melody filters from the speaker. You turn the music all the way up and point to the motion. Todoroki follows your finger once more, enjoying the sights and the sounds. 
He likes the way you hum the tune and softly sing the lyrics more than he likes the radio. Again those weird butterflies take flight in his stomach as his heart quickens. 
The two of you stand frozen for a song or two before moving along, you tuck the still singing phone into Todoroki's pocket. 
"Let's keep it on." You smile at him, wrapping yourself in your arms, fighting the chatter of your teeth as you pass a house or two. He wishes he could help keep you warm until he remembers what an old jade haired friend used to say. 
"I bet people love your right side in the winter. You're so warm even without using your quirk!" 
Suddenly Shoto's left hand is on your shoulder guiding you to the right side of his body. His strong, warm arm pulls you into him, your cheek pressed against his chest and your arms into his side. The smell of amber and campfire tickle your nose. You looked up at him shocked but instead of reacting to you he continued to walk forward as if this were nothing. A sigh of contentment falls from your lips in the form of fog. The only thing that would make this perfect would be food. Your stomach agrees with you growling loudly, loudly enough it can be heard over the lull of the music. Hot embarrassment creeps into your cheeks as you silently pray he hadn't heard it. 
But Shoto did hear that growl. A genuine laugh rumbles in his chest causing your flush to deepen, damn your stomach for being so loud. Something about his laugh makes your stomach knot. 
"They only had cheese and crackers there!" You say defensively while he keeps his rare smile, palm pleasantly hot against your skin.
"It's okay I'm hungry too." He admits.
"Then let's grab something to eat! You like cold soba right?" You rack your brain for a place that would sell it at this hour while he looks down at you and your cute inquisitive look. He thinks back on the night wondering what he would be doing if he hadn't let you drag him out into the drizzling cold. He would probably still be standing there frozen in his spot as the lifeless party went on around him, as life went on around him.
He had to admit he had never felt warmer standing next to you beneath the falling snow and the twinkling lights. Silently he vows to somehow make you feel as good as he does right now.
"Let's get something warm instead." He pulls you closer to him, emitting more heat than he does naturally, "Then we can finish light looking." 
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triplethreatsonic · 4 years ago
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Triple Threat Drabble: The Stranger
Here it is, the drabble I said I’d share with you guys! I’ve done a sort of hybrid thing with this where there are one or two images integrated into the text that are basically like comic panels. (think Diary of a Wimpy Kid but hopefully more classy.) So make sure you pay attention to them as you read! 
Also, this is a work in progress. So please don’t judge it too harshly :) 
Hope you guys enjoy this! 
___
Sonic was not a slow eater. He hadn't been one as a child, and at age seventeen he certainly wasn't one now. The hedgehog rarely spent more than a few minutes to inhale his food during lunch period. Today was no different— after making quick work of the cafeteria's lasagna, Sonic had pushed his plate aside and was now settled with his left leg comfortably draped on top of his right, one hand fiddling with his shoelace. 
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Across the table from him sat his friend, Knuckles the Echidna. Knuckles, who was one of the slowest eaters Sonic had ever seen, still had half his meal on his tray and was gradually picking away at a small bunch of grapes. "Probably." His eyes stayed on his hands as he smiled. "I don't think it'll be too bad, though; I'm looking forward to the history paper."
Sonic smirked. "I bet you are. I wonder what you'll write about this time. Maybe"—he cocked an eyebrow—"the ancient echidnas?"
"How'd you guess?" Knuckles smile widened as he dropped the now-empty grape stem onto his tray. Then he sighed, stretching his shoulders back. "I doubt the library has any new books on the topic, though. Seriously, they need an upgrade."
“Man, you're telling me. The other day, I—!" Sonic's thought was suddenly cut short.  If you had asked him what he'd just been talking about, he probably couldn't have told you. 
"No way..."
Something, or rather someone, had caught his attention— someone on the opposite side of the cafeteria, who had just sat down at a faraway table perpendicular to Sonic's position. 
It was a male hedgehog— that much was obvious. Looking at him, Sonic could make out his dark jeans, white t-shirt, and thin red-and-black striped flannel with the sleeves rolled up to the elbows. The stranger sat, seemingly in silence, listening to a white female bat sitting across from him. 
None of this was what made Sonic stare, however; it was his quills.
Their coloring wasn't necessarily unnatural for a hedgehog, but it was certainly unusual. They were black, the top of each quill traced by a long red stripe. Sonic had never seen anything like them. 
Except that he had-- several times. He'd seen them in his dream. 
"Hey, Sonic! You ok?"
Knuckles words yanked Sonic out of his trance and back into the buzzing world of the lunch room. "Wha—? Oh, sorry man. Heh, guess I kinda zoned out for a second."
"What were you staring at?" Knuckles turned in his seat to scan the room behind him. 
"Nothing!" The word flew out of Sonic's mouth much quicker than he would have liked. He quickly brushed it off with a shrug. "I just remembered something I gotta do before lunch is over. I'd better run—see you later, alright?"
Knuckles looked like he didn't quite believe him. "What do you gotta do?"
Sonic’s face smiled as his brain racked for an answer. "Uh, homework. Never ends, am I right?"
Now it was Knuckles turn to smirk. "Heh, right." He picked up his mini milk carton and took a swig. "Well, good luck. I'll see you in fifth."
"Later, Knux!" Sonic grinned and picked up his tray from the table, keeping his movements casual as he made his way to the garbage cans. Behind his calm exterior, however, Sonic's mind was racing. It was a coincidence. It was a weird coincidence. But that's all it could be, right? Just a really weird, off-putting coincidence that meant nothing. Absolutely nothing at all. 
So why was he so antsy all of a sudden? 
Frankly, Sonic didn't even know why he had left Knuckles in such a hurry with that dumb fib about homework. What was he hoping to do? Was he planning to talk to the Weird-Coincidence Guy? 
Well… it wasn't the worst idea. 
Sonic's eyes flicked upwards from his tray; the black-and-red hedgehog was easy to pick out now that he knew he was there. Sonic's hands moved automatically, scraping his plates as he kept his eyes fixed on the stranger. The white bat across from him finished her sentence, waved, and then left, walking out through the cafeteria's main double doors. The black hedgehog watched her leave, a soda can held tightly in his hands. He barely moved at all.  
Sonic dropped his plate unceremoniously into the designated bin. Now that the idea had entered his mind, he couldn’t shake it: he had to talk to him. As nonchalantly as he could, Sonic began weaving around chairs, backpacks and tables, gradually making his way to the strange hedgehog. 
He was practically on top of him now. Sonic stopped walking, the black hedgehog a mere four feet ahead of him. He was facing away, hands still holding that soda can. Without so much as a second thought, Sonic smiled and said the first, most natural thing that came to his mind: “Hey!” 
What happened next was the last thing Sonic had expected. The black hedgehog turned at his voice, saw him, and froze. His face paled and his eyes went wide. Something like an electric shock seemed to go through him, and the can in his hands crunched.  
Brrrrrrrriiiiiiiiiiiiing! The five-minute bell shouted rudely across the cafeteria, startling them both, and they were drowned in a wave of standing students. The black hedgehog was instantly blocked from view as three hundred teenagers, Human and Animal, began gathering their things and preparing to leave for classes. 
“H-hey, wait a sec!” Sonic tried to see past the masses of knees and elbows, but quickly found that to be useless. He wasn’t one to give up easily, however; in seconds, Sonic had jumped onto the nearest table and was craning his neck to see over the sea of heads. Where could that guy have gone so quickly? Suddenly—there! Sonic barely caught sight of striped flannel as its wearer ducked around the corner of an adjacent hallway.
"Hey, dude, wait up!" Sonic was down in a flash. After shoving his way through the crowd he sprinted into the hall just as his target ran left down another. He called after him. "Yo, black hedgehog!" It became a game of cat and mouse as they chased each other down seemingly countless hallways and past endless classrooms. Sonic was fast on the track—the fastest in the state, in fact— but somehow this guy kept eluding him with all his constant turns. 
Sonic finally whipped right around the ten-billionth corner only to come to an abrupt halt— the hallway ended just twenty feet in front of him. Sonic looked over his shoulder, then back at the dead end. He was positive this was the direction the hedgehog had dodged... so where did he go? 
"Hello? Uh, you down here, man?" Sonic slowly walked forward as his question echoed in the empty hall. "I just wanna talk for a second."
Silence. 
Then out of nowhere a blur of movement slammed into Sonic's chest, smashing him against a line of lockers. Sonic's breath was knocked out of him, and it took him a second to realize what had happened: standing there, with his forearm crushing Sonic’s ribs, was the black hedgehog. His eyes were mere inches away from his own. They were a bight crimson— to Sonic's astonishment, the color he expected them to be— with a ferocious, wild expression in them. There was also the depth of something that Sonic couldn’t quite name. 
"Why are you following me?” he demanded. 
Sonic’s hands flew up like a man held at gunpoint. "Woah, dude! Chill! I'm … I'm sorry!” It was still difficult to breathe. "I'm just… I just wanna… wanna talk!"
They stood there locked in place for a moment, both hedgehogs panting. A minute passed, and gradually something seemed to shift in the black hedgehog's eyes. He glanced downward at the arm that pinned Sonic, then back up at the hedgehog's face. Then he backed a few paces, his hands lowering to his sides. 
Sonic pushed himself off the lockers and rubbed his chest. "Wow, you hit hard! You play football or something?" He gave the guy a smile. "Sorry. I probably really weirded you out back there—I said hi, but then the bell rang and you ran off and—"
"And you chased me." The hedgehog's voice was deeper than Sonic's when he spoke, with a sharp edge to it. The guy looked close to graduating— frankly, with his stern face, he barely looked like he belonged in high school at all. His arms moved to cross in front of his chest. "What do you want?" 
"Uh..." Sonics brain suddenly froze. In that moment he realized that beyond his first hello, he hadn't actually thought of what he wanted to say to this guy. "I… I'm not sure. I just wanted to say hi, I guess." 
"Why?"
"Well, um... aw, shoot, this sounds really stupid now." Sonic's smile turned sheepish. "I wanted to talk 'cause… you look kinda familiar?" 
Other than a slight eyebrow raise, the black hedgehog didn’t move. His voice dripped with contempt. "Where on earth would I have met you before?" 
"Heh, funny you should ask." Sonic shoved his thumbs in his pockets. "Uh, how long've you been at the school?"
"Three weeks." 
Sonic did a double take. “Wait— really? Like, it's your first semester? But… you look like a senior." 
"And?" 
"Oh, I dunno... I guess thats just kinda rare, you know? New seniors? I'm a junior, myself." Sonic smiled, but the black hedgehog didn't flinch. He cleared his throat. "Well, anyway… You really do look super familiar to me. It's kinda freaky, actually."
The dark hedgehog's eyes narrowed. "And why would you say that?"
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Sonic wasn't sure what reaction he'd been waiting for— maybe a good laugh, if anything— but it certainly wasn't what the black hedgehog was doing now. His shoulders hitched, fingers digging into his forearms. Even more surprising was his face; it had that same haunted look Sonic had glimpsed before— back in the cafeteria, right when the stranger had first seen him. 
And then all at once it was gone, replaced by the earlier scowl. "That's ridiculous.” 
Sonic’s hand dropped down from where it had been resting behind his head. “Um… yeah. Yeah, it is.”
They stood there in a heavy silence. The black hedgehog drummed his fingers against his arm. “Is that all?”  
Sonic stared back at him. “… Yes.” 
The other hedgehog looked at Sonic a moment longer, annoyed expression unchanging. Then with a ‘hmph’, he turned away abruptly, walking back towards the hallway through which they had come. 
Sonic watched him leave. He felt the urge to say something, but nothing came to mind. Well, that was weird. What had he been expecting though, really? The whole reason for him talking to the guy was weird to begin with. It was funny; though Sonic was usually very confident around strangers, this whole conversation— which he himself had initiated— had made even him uncomfortable. 
Sonic began to turn the in the opposite direction to head to his own class— only find himself staring at the dead-end hallway again. Whoops. There was only one other way to go. 
The black hedgehog’s ear perked as footsteps echoed behind him, and he turned his head sharply. Sonic’s hands shot back up in the air again upon being caught. “Sorry, ignore me—my class is this way too.” 
The stranger glared at Sonic a moment, then turned back and kept walking. Sonic waited a second, allowing for some space, then continued on behind. 
There was almost no other sound as the two of them made their way down the hall. Sonic slipped his thumbs back into his pockets, trying not to look at the stranger. Eventually, he let his eyes drift to the back of the hedgehog’s head. What was up with the guy, anyway? He sure was a tough nut to crack— tougher than even Knuckles had been when they’d first met, and that was saying something. This guy refused to be warmed up in any way, shape, or form. Sonic had nothing to work with here, and it left him at a loss. 
Eventually Sonic couldn’t stand the silence anymore. “Hey,” he ventured, “sorry I got on your nerves back there."
If the other hedgehog heard him, he gave no sign of it.
A few more seconds passed. Sonic took a breath. "I probably shouldn’t have bothered you. It was kinda silly to say anything at all, to be honest. I probably wouldn’t’ve, either, if I’d only had the dream once. It's just weird, you know? ‘Cause I don’t even know you, but this guy that looks exactly like you is in the dream every single time, along with that other hedgehog—”  
“I don’t care!” 
Instantly, the black hedgehog was in Sonic’s face. Teeth bared, fangs showing, a threatening finger nearly stabbed Sonic in the eye. “I’m going to say this once, Blue Hedgehog. I don’t care about your dreams. I don’t care if I was in it, or that white hedgehog, or you, or anybody! And I’m tired of hearing about it.” 
They stood there a moment, with Sonic for once in his life standing perfectly still. The black hedgehog’s finger lowered as he growled. “Are we clear?” 
With the finger out of his face, Sonic slowly straightened. Ok, talking more was definitely not going to take any tension out of the air. He opened his mouth to give a simple reply. 
Then something clicked. “Wait... How did you know the hedgehog was white?”
The scowl on the stranger’s face faded slightly, the air seeming to still. “What?” he breathed. 
“The other hedgehog,” said Sonic, "I never mentioned what color his fur was.” Now he leaned forward, studying the stranger. He met his eyes. "How did you know it was white?”
The stranger gave no response. The blood had slowly drained from his face, leaving it ghostly pale as his mouth hung open wordlessly. 
Then suddenly his face clenched, and a hand jerked out to slap Sonic away. “Enough!” 
He dashed off. It took Sonic a second to recover from the unexpected shove. “Wha- Hey, dude, wait!" He sprinted around the corner ahead. "Where are you going—?!"
The black hedgehog was gone. 
Sonic stood staring blankly down the empty hallway.  What the heck? Thoughts swirled around his brain—half of them were questions, and the other half were answers that didn’t make sense. He leaned his left arm against the rough brick wall next to him. 
Had “white” simply been a guess? A stab in the dark? Was that the color everybody thought of when they pictured the average hedgehog? 
Or did he know, too?
Another blaring brrrring! from the bell startled Sonic out of his thoughts. “Aw, shoot.” He was late for chemistry. He took off at a sprint. 
A few minutes later, Sonic would come rushing through his classroom door. He wouldn’t remember that he needed to grab his textbook from his locker until he was already inside. No excuse would be given when when his teacher scolded him, declaring solemnly that being the school’s track star did not justify him arriving late to class. Later, when everyone was paired up for experiments, Tails would ask him where he’d been; cutting it close was normal for Sonic, but arriving seven minutes after the bell was not. Sonic would hesitate a moment. Then he’d give his best friend a smile, ruffling the fur on his head. “It’s not really important,” he’d say, “no worries. Let’s just get these reactions done.” 
Hours later, in dark of his bedroom, Sonic would still be thinking about that black hedgehog. 
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wendystales · 4 years ago
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Memories - lrh (Chapter Four)
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Memories (also on Wattpad)
Chapter Three ※※※※※ Chapter Five
I absorbed and enjoyed the silence that was hovering around my house. I grabbed a glass of juice and sat down on the couch on the balcony. My mom left early for work, and Leah even tried to take me along for a photo shoot she was going to do in Venice. But, honestly, I'm not in the mood for dragging plaster casts around under the sun.
Not to mention that it is good to have moments alone to get my head straight. I know that in a little while it will be even harder to escape from these outings, I mean, I know I have to get back to my routine, but as long as I can avoid it, I will.
I put the juice on the table and pick up my diary. Unlike yesterday, I open it to the first page, like a book, and start reading. I go through a few pages about my feelings, about what I planned about my future, about my parents' divorce.
"I know it was inevitable. Anyone could tell how distant they were, I just didn't want it to be like that, that she suffered the same way I did. And I didn't want to feel that anger from him. But deep down, I know it's for the best.".
A few more pages telling about the scout who had seen me at the mall, the first photo shoot, the first runway show for a small clothing brand. Then arriving at the day I met Ashton.
"That one nobody expected/imagined/sought for. Ashton Irwin is my yoga partner!!! Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. Oh my gosh, I never would have imagined that. I was dying of nervousness about being the new student, then he comes and offers to be my duo and oh gosh, he's amazing. Super fun and nice. AND HE CALLED ME UP FOR COFFEE ON SUNDAY.
" Ashton and I sat at a table on the sidewalk. Under the table, I snapped my fingers in nervousness as I read the menu.
- Do you already know what you are going to order? - he asks. I pout and nod my head in denial.
- All I know is that I don't want espresso. - I comment.
- Can I recommend one? I think you'll like it, it's whipped with cream and chocolate, very sweet. - He points to the menu after I accept his suggestion.
- It amazes me how good you are at coffee. - I joke, making him laugh.
- I like coffee. I once took a tour of a coffee farm in the countryside right here in California.
Coffee becomes our first topic. Because he knows and understands coffee, Ashton convinces me to do a tasting at a promising coffee shop in Brentwood the next morning. It was not the kind of program I am used to doing, but everything is different now, my life has changed and so have my types of programs.
- You are lost being my friend, I will call you all morning for breakfast together. - Ashton comments as we drive along the sidewalks of Los Angeles.
My body shakes when it hears the word "friend". I still wasn't sure if I could consider Ash a friend, but now, I'm happy to know that I can and that he considers me too. "
The memory warms and cheers me up, giving me more desire to read and remember.
I don't realize how much I was smiling until my cheeks start to hurt. After that day, his name becomes very frequent, until it joins Leah's.
"I don't know how to explain this girl. She came in so confident and nose to nose, I was sure she would be insufferable, then she opened her mouth and all I could think was 'where has she been all my life? ' And I don't want to get my hopes up or be a pain in the ass, but she's also a model and she talked about me going to her father's agency and if that works out? it's one of the biggest agencies in the world, I'm going to take off. God, if this is your will...".
I laugh at the following narrations that already involve Ashton, Noah and Leah. I can't remember what is written, but my imagination gives me a warm, happy feeling in my body. And if the reality has been as fun and nice as what I imagined, then it was very good.
I feel my body shiver and a chill take over my stomach when I see Luke's name for the first time. I cut the pace of my reading, preparing myself for what was to come. I reach for another glass of juice, buying time and even courage to read the rest.
"I had already noticed him looking at me, I just didn't want to believe he was looking at me, and it was perfect like that, until Ashton brought him in. It's one thing to know who Luke is, it's another to talk to him. In the end it wasn't so bad. I guess. I just stared for the first hour at anything but him, but I guess he must have missed it. Now I'm in the dilemma of if he liked me, I mean, we spent four hours talking and nothing, no kiss, no phone exchange. NOTHING."
I laugh at myself. I can perfectly see myself being embarrassed by him and not being able to look him in the eye.. If I could go back in time, I would tell this Marnie that Luke really liked her, even though I only had a basis in videos and pictures.
I pick up my cell phone and open insta, going to the date that marked my diary. 07/06/18. It was Ashton's birthday party. I flip to the side and see a picture taken in Hawaii, with the caption "The one where we got lost". I turn the page and find that trip.
"I know I am committing one of the biggest follies of my life and deep down, I don't even know why. That's a lie, I do, but that's not the point. In fact, it is, but that's not what I'm going to talk about. Again, it is. The point is: I can't believe that at the last minute I agreed to go on a trip to Hawaii with a bunch of people I barely know. Except Ash, Noah and Leah. And P.S. Monday is his birthday. It only gets better.”
Apparently things between Luke and me went pretty quickly. I read a few more pages seeing that on his birthday, we had our first kiss and from then on everything happened too fast and messy.
I write about many fights and reconciliations. Both he and I, didn't want anything serious, but both he and I, couldn't stay away from each other and there was my reason.
"There is a good big part of all this blocking that I believe is because of what happened and because of me trying to pretend it didn't happen. Dr. Prescott says that if I don't put it out there and don't talk about it, it will consume me. 'Talking about our fears, worries and problems makes them smaller and easier to defeat.'
Besides my parents, no one else knows about that day."
I run my eyes quickly down the page, seeing that that one was about Stephen's cheating.
I close the journal in fear. I don't know what is coming, and I don't know if I have the courage to read it. It is one thing to hear about it from others, from their view and opinion, even if it is not on purpose. It's another to hear about it from my view, from what I've been through.
I have no doubt that there are things in these next pages that maybe even my parents don't know. Things and feelings that I have kept solely and exclusively to myself and I don't know if I am ready to face this, again.
I put down the diary and go in search of something else. Luckily for me, my guardian angel, aka Leah, calls me.
“Are you busy? I thought we could have lunch together. What do you think?” she bombards me, not letting me say hello.
“Hi to you too. No, I'm not busy, just reading my diary.” I run my hand over the cover, keeping in the back of my mind what awaits me. “ I'll take lunch.”
Before Leah can answer, I hear a muffled argument on the phone and wait for the fight to end.
“Sorry, but Noah is asking if he can come along.” she asks, without patience.
“Of course he can.” I hold my laughter, imagining the two of them fighting on the other end of the line.
“Okay, in a few minutes we'll be there. Kisses.”
I say goodbye to her and decide not to read the diary again. The doctor himself told me not to force myself into anything. I set the table and wait for the two of them to arrive.
After forty minutes, the doorbell rings. I make way for my friend and analyze the tall, muscular man behind her. Unlike my memory, the Noah of today has his hair well shaved and brunette, like his sister's. His green eyes fill with tears when he sees me crack a smile, and like his twin, he doesn't wait for permission and hugs me.
“Don't ever do that again, young lady. What a shitty world this would be without you!” he squeezes me before showering me with kisses, all over my face.
Leah turns and pulls him away from me, making me laugh. I follow them both into the kitchen and look at the bags they brought, excited.
“We made sure to stop by The Palm and pick up your favorite dish.” I didn't even know that I had a favorite dish at The Palm. But when Leah opens a box and I feel my mouth water when I see that noodle with shrimp, I realize how little I know myself.
“Have I ever told you that I love you?” I ask softly, with a smile.
We start lunch and today my attention was on Noah, after all he was the new thing. I listen to him tell about the day we met, when he began to advise my career with his sister, and how things have been going since the accident.
“You don't have to give any interviews if you don't want to.” he assures me once again.
I still don't know how to deal with this "public figure" business, but deep down I feel a need to give a "satisfaction" to everyone who knows me. Noah has already sent some notes about my condition, but I know that I will have to appear on some channel in the future.
We changed the subject and started talking about my amnesia. Noah was not very happy that my first memory was his hair fiasco. I commented that I was reading my diary and asked about some events.
“Are we really lost in Hawaii?” they both started to laugh and agree.
“That day I wanted to hit Mark. I was getting very angry that he could not accept that he was reading the wrong map. Not to mention the car dying and us pushing," Noah comments.
“Mark was never good with maps. He says himself that he was a lousy Boy Scout.” Leah says before drying her third glass of water.
“Who is Mark?” I question.
“Mark is an ex-lover of mine. At the time we were chatting and he had the house in Hawaii. One thing led to another and in the end he went along.” Leah ends with a frown.
“And why did we let him drive then?” I ask, full of curiosity. They look at me as if I know the answer. Or, as if I should, but I just raise my eyebrows, saying nothing.
“Because it's Mark.” Noah shrugs. “He likes to be in control of everything.”
“The one who was definitely happy with us there was that guy who owns the coconut stand.” Leah says.
So there it is, the little wooden stand, with a pile of coconuts in front of it. A short man, probably about 50 years old, laughing at our misfortune while selling the fruit to us. Images begin to form in my mind.
" “- Look there.” Kyleen and I focus on the little man laughing as he takes the money from Michael's hand. “He sure is very happy with us standing here.” Leah says.
“Of course he is. We already bought twelve coconuts from him. Bad little man.” I make a face.
“We're not lost. It's just a shortcut.” we cut off eye contact with the stand and focus on Mark arguing with Noah and Ashton.
Leah looked at her lover in total disbelief at what she had gotten herself into. If regret could kill. The next moment Mark stomps his foot on the floor, like a child with a temper tantrum. At that moment, Calum looks at me with wide eyes.
I look away so that he doesn't see me laughing. Kiki, who was behind me, slaps me to stop, but this only makes me want to laugh more. I hide my face in her arm and in the end, my laughter gets out of hand. Both she and Calum start laughing with me, causing the boys to look at us curiously.
It takes no more than five minutes for Mike to join in the laughter with us and soon everyone else was laughing except Mark. Even the little bad man was laughing. It was the worst thing about us being lost, but that's what was happening and it couldn't be anything but comical, even though it was sad too. ”
“Of course he was happy. He sold about fifteen coconuts for us.” I don't even try to control my smile. Once again I remembered, and this is more than great.
The twin couple in front of me crack a big smile too, and soon they are clapping their hands and stamping their feet on the floor, making noise. I clap my hands with them in celebration.
“She is coming back.” Noah comes around the table, hugging me from behind and again showering me with kisses.
I was never one to have many friends. Usually it was just Bethany and Stephen, and a girl in my music class, but I don't know if I can consider her that, after all, we only talked during class and it was all very unrelated.
The point is that I have always envied those people who managed to have a large number of friends, and friends really, not just colleagues. Friends who call you for everything, who are always by your side, who enjoy your company, and who consider you family.
In this moment, with just Noah and Leah, I can see that I finally have these friends that I have wanted so much and without having to pretend to be something that I am not, without having to buy their attention, as I felt I needed it with Bethany. And if I'm happy like this with just the two of them, I can't wait to see the others.
“So, you said you were reading your diary, did you remember anything else?” Leah asks excitedly.
All the happiness and euphoria that had surrounded my body disappears. The bloody page with the bloody day comes back into my mind. They both notice my mood drop.
“I remembered a day when I went to have coffee with Ash, but…” I play with the edge of my cup, trying not to get too much into that energy. “I found a day where I tell about what happened.” I look at them, who are serious and attentive.
“Do you want us to read it with you?” Leah holds my hand across the table, gently patting it.
I shake my head positively and point to the notebook on the coffee table in the living room. I watch her return with the notebook and hand it to me. I open it to the marked page and stare at my handwriting again.
"I haven't had the courage to tell either Ashton, Leah, or much less Luke. I can't tell if I'm ashamed of it or just afraid of it happening again. The problem is that it's really starting to get to me, to the point where I get irritated when I see Luke and Leah talking and it shouldn't be like that. So I need to get it all out so that I can start over.
It was our anniversary. I snuck out of my work to see Stephen at his house. I wanted to deliver his gift soon. Two streets before his house I ran into Noelle, his mother, and told her I wanted to surprise him, so she told me to get the key under the third vase and go in.
Maybe it would have been better just to ring the doorbell and not have to see it. I was very quiet so as not to be discovered, and in the end, I was the one who discovered something."
My racing heart hurts from beating so hard. I can't keep my breathing normal, holding it at various times. I feel like it's a suspense book where no one wants to find out what's behind the door of the abandoned house, but needs to, in order to continue the story.
I notice in some letters and words the ink smudged and I know it was from my tears and it only hurts me more.
"There is no word to describe the disgust, pain, and anger of seeing him and her in bed naked. My until then boyfriend, and my until then best friend.
And what only made it worse was that she didn't even try to explain herself, didn't show an ounce of regret, even if it was a pretense. Nothing. While he tried to say it was nothing like that, Bethany still says it had been going on for a long time."
I close the journal angrily and throw it away, stopping on the other side of the long table. The lump in my throat gets bigger, but I don't want to cry, not for this and not again.
Deep down, I have always had a flea behind my ear with the two of them. The countless rides Stephen insisted on giving her. The way she always motivated me to fight with him, for reasons I thought were small and insignificant. But it was my first serious relationship, what did I know about dating, right? Bethany, on the other hand, had dated seriously twice.
It had always been there, I just didn't want to see it.
“I always suspected it and never, never wanted to believe it. After all, he was my boyfriend and she was my best friend. They wouldn't be able to.” I let out a humorless laugh.
The twins look at me fearfully, as if I were a mother scolding them.
“But you know what the worst part is? I believed him. He looked me in the face and said that nothing happened. That Luke was to blame for our breakup! How stupid of me!” I shout, picking up the diary and throwing it further away, as if it would hurt Stephen.
“Wait, what?” Leah speaks loudly.
I look at her startled and realize what I said. I open my mouth, but nothing comes out. I didn't want anyone to know about the meeting.
“You met with Stephen? When?” she turns the table around, coming closer. I swallow dryly.
“Yesterday morning," I begin softly, but it was enough for Leah to cover her eyes with her hands and snort. Noah laid his head on his arms, sighing as well. “I was confused and needed to hear and see him.” I start to defend myself.
“After everything your mother told you about him?” Leah asks.
“And you think I would believe her? Would you? With amnesia on account?” I retort. Leah takes a deep breath and denies it with her head, giving me reason.
“But you could have told, or asked, I don't know.” Noah ponders.
“Nobody would have let me, I know nobody likes him and rightly so.” I give in.
“That explains a lot.” Leah comments softly, but loud enough for me to hear.
“Explains what?” I ask confused.
She looks at Noah, who nods, giving her the green light. Like me, she swallows dryly before she begins.
“Explain why Luke is so grouchy and weird. Not wanting to come see you.” he answers, poking at the seam of the chair.
NO! No! No! No! No! Please, no. He can't have seen.
“You have to take me to his house.” I ask, heading for the hall.
“What?” the two shout following me.
“I need to talk to him. Now!” I shout the last part, putting on a jacket with some difficulty.
“But why?” Noah helps me.
“Because I think he saw something that wasn't supposed to happen and got it wrong.” I open the door, going to call the elevator.
“Oh, no!” they understand and soon follow me.
Things between Luke and me may be messed up, but the last thing I want him to think is that I cheated on him.
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sillyrabbit81 · 4 years ago
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Her Heavy Cross
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Summary: Three years after tragedy hits, Lana she decides to start dating again. She meets Will through a dating app and they begin an online romance. After months of constant requests, Lana relents and agrees to meet and go on an irl date with Will. But is Will who he says he is? Lana is quickly pulled into an intense relationship forcing her to confront her tragic past. Will Lana face it or will she close her heart forever?
Pairing: OMC x OFC
Word Count: approx 3.8k
Warnings: swearing, angst, mentions of death,
Authors Note: The story started as a Henry Cavill fanfiction but I changed it to be an original character, but shades of Henry are still there. Hope you enjoy the story and thanks for reading.
Part 17 Part 19
Part 18
It was a crazy week, and by Wednesday, I had had enough and wanted it to be all over. It was the last day of school for the term. The kids were rowdy, and it was hard for them to concentrate. I gave up structured lessons after the morning session, and we did Easter craft. Still, even craft was hard for my kids. Most of them can't use scissors without assistance or had to use modified ones set into a wooden block. It wasn't a bludge, but it was much less stressful for both the kids and myself.
I had playground duty at lunchtime. Some of the older mainstream kids had heard about Liam, and a few would walk past me and sing the theme song to his superhero movies. Others would have a conversation with me and sneak in a movie quote. Lucky for me, most of Liam's films weren't appropriate for children, so there were only a few they could use. The kids would run away giggling, and I would shake my head. I wasn't upset by it, kids are kids, and at least they made their fun to my face.
The parents were awful. The mums would go quiet when I was near them, and I would hear laughter or whispering as I walked away. The dads looked at me just that little bit longer, making me feel uncomfortable. I just tried to remember Liam's arms around me, the way he made me feel safe in his arms. I found myself touching my earrings a lot. They soothed me.
The worst part was the other staff. Not all of them, just a couple of the younger ones and newer ones. Their eyes seemed to bore into me in the staff room and in meetings. The ones who had been here when Andy died were good. They appeared to be on the same page as Marla had been. The rest of the support class teachers and TA's were kind. They actually asked me to my face about it, seemed happy for me, and then that was it they moved on.
My boss, Michael, did call me into his office on Monday afternoon. He was good about it mostly, just concerned because apparently, the office staff had received a few phone calls from a couple of media outlets trying to get in contact with me. The staff were good enough to hang up on them. I was honest with Michael and said I didn't know what my plans were, just that we were dating. I did tell him about how it would be official on Thursday, but it worked out well because the office would be empty for two weeks, and by then, I'll be old news.
When I spoke to Liam on the phone, I had told him about how I was feeling. I was honest about it as much as I could be.
Liam was empathetic and seemed sincere when he said I didn't have to go. "If it's too much, we can wait for another time. The dress you have will be as good in a few months as it is now. Or we can return it all and try again later." Cheekily he said, "I'll let you keep the earrings."
I declined. I wanted to get it over with. I figured the quicker it was done, the quicker no one would care, and I can go back into hiding. It was like ripping off a band-aid. Just do it.
When I had gotten home from work on Tuesday, I had decided to do the hardest thing of all. I called Andy's mother.
Anthea was born in Greece and immigrated to Australia with her family in her early teens. She had met Andy's dad, Tim, a white Australian with Irish heritage, and they had a beautiful marriage. They had five children, three boys and two girls. Andy was the youngest son and was the unofficial favourite. She had always been lovely to me. She always called me Little Lana and would always hug me and insist I ate. On my birthday, she would make me galaktoboureko. She still calls me for my birthday and invites me over for Orthodox Easter and Christmas. I don't go, but I always make sure to call and send presents for my two godchildren.
"My Little Lana," Anthea gushed. "It is so good to hear from you. How are you going? Tim, Lana is on the phone! He will be so happy you called. Yes, Timothy, it's Lana. Yes, Tim says g'day. How are you? We miss you. How is work? How are your precious children? You do such good work, Little Lana."
Did I mention she talks a lot? She was one of those people who seemed to speak without having to take a breath.
"Hi Anthea, I'm doing well. Work is great, really good. I have a great bunch this year."
"Yes, you sound happy, Little Lana. Your new boyfriend must have something to do with it? He is very handsome. Not as handsome as Kamari mou but handsome. I showed all my friends, and they tell me you are still so beautiful and your hair is still so pretty and long. So long now. You've grown it."
I was stunned. I tried to talk, but the lump in my throat was so big, I couldn't swallow. I tried to say something, but all that came out was a huge sob, and I broke down.
"I'm sorry, Anthea, I am so sorry."
"Why are you crying? Stop it. Alana, why would I be upset? Why are you crying? Don't cry, silly girl. You should be happy. I do not expect you to be wearing black, like an old lady from my old country, for the rest of your life. I know you loved my son. but you're too young to grieve forever."
"I wanted to call you and tell you, but it happened so fast." I was still crying, but it wasn't so bad now. Anthea had comforted me in a way that I hadn't even known I needed. That she still loved me when I had started dating another man was incredible to me.
"You shhh, Little Lana. Listen to me. You have obviously called me for permission whether you know that's what you were doing or not. You have it, my blessing. Kamari mou wanted you to be happy also. He would not want you to be alone forever. You know this. Go speak to him, speak to Andy, and you will know."
"Thank you, Anthea."
"There now, Little Lana, you will be ok. Now no more speaking of sadness. I must tell you all the wonderful news. You will be an Aunty again soon."
Anthea talked to me for a little over an hour. Talking to Anthea was being talked at, but I needed it. I promised to call her again soon. She, of course, invited me to Easter but didn't expect a reply.
I felt lighter after talking to her. She was right. I had needed to know from her that she was ok with it. I don't know what I would have done if she hadn't been. I don't think I would have ended it with Liam. I think I was in too deep, but it would have been much harder to go on.
Anthea was right about something else too. I needed to talk to Andy.
So after school on Wednesday, I drove to the cemetery. I went and saw my Dad first. I didn't have much to say to him. I just sat there and let the memories come to me.
I remembered when I was six, and he shaved his moustache off, and I hadn't recognised him. I had run screaming to my Mum that there was a stranger in the house. I remembered how he would take us to see the fireworks on New Year's Eve, getting there early to get good spots and watch in awe as the fireworks exploded over Sydney Harbour. Nothing was as breathtaking as my home city on New Year's Eve. I thought about how he loved David Bowie, and he had even convinced my mother to name my brother after him. Dave and I had taken Dad to see David Bowie a few years before he passed away, and it was one of the most incredible nights of my life. The Labyrinth is still my favourite kid's movie, and Jareth was my first crush. He looked so good in those tights.
I went to see Andy. I don't see him very often. I go on Boxing Day, his birthday and our anniversary. As had become my ritual on those visits, I had his old phone and listened to his playlist. I laid down on the grass next to him and looked up at the sky. After a while, I started talking.
"Hey Butthead," I started, smiling as I said our private nickname. "I've got some things to tell you. First of all, I miss you. But surely you know that. And I know you know I will always love you. You were such a beacon in my life. A light for me when everything else was dark. I was like a moth to your flame. You drew me in, making me want to be close to you. You always made me feel like everything would be ok if I just stayed in your light. Things were so dark when you were taken from me. For so long, I felt nothing. Everything was dark.
"But then I started feeling better. I still missed you every day, but I wanted to find that again. Feel that love and safety again. I started dating about six months ago. Online mostly, you know, how the kids do it these days. I went on a few dates but felt nothing. Or if I did feel something, I felt like they weren't as good as you. Why would I settle for anyone who wasn't as good as you?
"I don't mean the same as you. I mean someone who moves me the way you did. Someone who showed me kindness like you did, someone who made me laugh, made me feel giddy. Someone I was attracted to. But also someone I wanted to do things for, someone who I wanted to go out of my way for, not because they forced me, but because I wanted to because I knew they would do it for me.
"I was about to give up. I only tried dating for a few months, but it felt so futile that I didn't care anymore. Then this guy started messaging me. He was sweet and funny, a Pom, but don't hold that against him. Anyway, I liked him instantly. It scared the shit out of me. I made him wait three months before I agreed to meet him. I was so scared because I knew I could fall for him.
"And when I met him, the sparks were there. It was instant. He was all the things I wanted. He's not like you. You're both very different. I mean, he doesn't like Mad Max for God's sake. But he makes me feel the way you made me feel. And Andy, I am falling for him."
*********************
"Lana, hold still." Jen was pulling my hair. I looked over at Riza, who was covering her mouth with a magazine. Her shaking shoulders gave her away, though, and I could see she was laughing her arse off. "I only have a couple more to do, and then you can go home and sleep."
I was at Riza's place. I had to see Jen after I spoke to Andy. Jen wanted to put my hair in pin curls. She had washed my hair and then got started pinning small sections of my already curly hair into curls.
I thought it was weird, but she said the hair has to be curled in the right direction for the style to work. She also said that the longer the curls were in, the better the result. That's why I was at her place, getting my hair done 24 hours before the event. How do celebrities live like this?
"How the hell am I going to sleep in this?" Riza's dropped all pretence and was laughing openly at me now. "Get bent, Riza."
"Hey! You're the one who looks like a 1950's housewife right now."
"1940's babe," Jen admonished. "Get it right."
When she finished, she wrapped my hair in a silk scarf. "Did you buy me an apron to go with the barefoot in the kitchen look?" I asked.
Jen laughed. She knew me well enough to know it was a joke. "Trust me. You're gonna love it."
"So when do I take the clips out?" I asked Jen.
"Not until I do your hair."
My eyes bulged. "I'm going to Liam's place hours before you're going to get there."
Riza pissed herself laughing, and Jen just said, "trust me."
When I got in bed, I rang Liam. I Facetimed him. Maybe if he laughs at me now, he won't laugh at me when I'm there, which would break my heart. His reaction surprised me.
"Why are you wearing a scarf? Please tell me you didn't dye your hair." He looked devastated.
"And what if I did?" I asked.
"You would still be you. It wouldn't change anything." He sputtered.
"Nice save," I laughed.
"I think being a redhead suits you. It makes you a little different."
I told Liam it was to protect the pin curls so they don't frizz. "You don't have to worry about me dying my hair until I start going white. I've never died my hair. It's my natural colour."
Liam's lip twitched. "I've noticed." He said.
I could have died.
On Thursday morning, I skipped the gym for obvious reasons, showered carefully so as not to wet my hair and started to get ready. I packed my bag and packed a bag for Perrin with his bed, crate, and food. I did a quick run through the shops to the dressmaker to pick the dress up from the dressmaker and to buy underwear for the dress. I didn't need a bra, but I wasn't going without underpants.
In the morning, I pottered, waiting for lunchtime to arrive and for Liam to finish his half-day at work. I was so jittery I had dropped my coffee this morning, and the mug had smashed. Not having anything to do and waiting for hours made it all worse. I had to do something, so I painted my nails and watched Kill Bill Vol. 1.
The story took me over, and soon I was transported with the action and exceptional dialogue. I decided the only person who could convince me to be an actor would be Quentin. I even went and got out my "Written and Directed by Quentin Tarantino" hoodie for added comfort. When it was over, I did feel a little better and whistling the song from the movie, I got Perrin and went to Liam's.
By the time I got to Liam's house, the nerves had come back. I found it hard to concentrate and almost just walked Perrin into the backyard. I sighed and put Perrin on his leash and texted Liam that I was here, and walked to the park with Perrin. We had planned a way to introduce the dogs during the week. The snag was I had agreed to it before I knew about the hair situation. But I found an old bucket hat of Andy's that fit and hid most of my head. I still felt ridiculous, but at least the hat somewhat normal.
When I saw Liam, my heart leapt. I wanted to run to him, have him hold me, soothe away all the pain of the last week and fear of tonight. But we had to introduce the dogs first.
We walked to each other as Perrin and Cole had a little sniff of each other. There was no immediate dislike.
"Hello, Sweetheart." His voice took my breath away.
"Hi," I said.
"Cute hat."
"Arse." I was smiling, though.
"I've missed you," he smiled broadly.
I gave him a small smile.
Liam farrowed his eyebrows. "These two look like they are ok," he said. "Let's go for a walk, shall we?"
I nodded, and Liam leaned in and gave me a quick kiss on the cheek before we started to walk. We went side by side, keeping the dogs apart. Liam put his arm around my shoulder.
"You're very quiet this afternoon," he said after a few minutes.
"I'm nervous."
"About the dogs or tonight?" He asked. "Or something else?"
"Tonight." I felt like a petulant child with all these short remarks, but I couldn't give him anymore just yet. I let my head rest on his shoulder to try to let him know he wasn't the reason I was acting distant.
Liam squeezed me. "You'll be ok. You're going to be dressed beautifully and appropriately. No one is going to laugh at you. You'll see. Myra and Boyd are all excited to meet you. This is Myra's boyfriends first red carpet, too, so you won't be the only virgin." He paused and chuckled. "Although, I had better keep you two apart. He's a sparky? I think that's the word. I don't want him stealing you away from me. I know how much you love tradies."
I laughed. Liam had said all the right things in a few moments, and I felt calm again. At least calm enough that I can have a conversation. "Thanks, Liam," I said and kissed his cheek.
We walked for about half an hour. The dogs walked together for a bit. Perrin, being so old, was pretty laid back about the whole thing and Cole, while curious, just seemed happy to be making a new friend.
When we got back to Liam's house, we let them leashes off, and Perrin had a sniff around the yard. Cole either followed behind him or bounced around in front of him as if he were saying, "come look at this place over here."
While Perrin explored, Liam stood behind me, wrapping his arms around my waist and resting his chin on my shoulder. I laid my head on his shoulder and closed my eyes a moment, listening to the sounds of the city.
"You're such a good hugger," I told Liam as I turned around in his arms and put my arms around his neck. I buried my face into his shirt, seeking his warmth and familiar scent.
"A compliment. From you? With no sarcasm?" Liam teased. "It must be my lucky day."
"Just shut up and kiss me," I said, and I lifted my head to meet his. Our kisses were soft at first, but they became more than that very quickly.
Liam pulled away and said, "we aren't alone. Ryan is here." Liam suggested that Ryan stay with the dogs while we were out. He would be back on Sunday and Monday, too, to take Cole for a walk and play.
I sighed. "Riza will be here soon anyway. We better get these guys inside and settled."
We took the dogs inside and got them set up. Then and I met Ryan, who was working in Liam's study. I don't know what I expected from Ryan, but a Scottish Hercules was not it. He was at least as large as Liam, had dark hair and green eyes and although he paled in comparison to Liam, he was handsome and instantly likeable.
We shook hands, and he said, "it's nice to meet you, Lana. I've heard a lot about you, so it's nice to put a face to the name." His accent was noticeable but not thick, and he spoke with a confident calmness that must be essential in his job. He doesn't mention or look at my scarf, which is a relief. I smiled and said, "Same. I keep hearing all these names, so it's nice to meet finally."
Liam gets me to put Ryans number in my phone. He said I should call Ryan if I need to contact him if he's not reachable while filming. I look at Ryan, and he nods as he says, "it's my job."
I do it, but I roll my eyes. He's not my assistant.
We let Ryan get back to work, and we go out to my car to bring my stuff in. By the time I've set up Perrin's things and sorted out my put my bags away, Riza and Jen arrive.
Liam opened the door for them, and Riza stood stunned for a moment. "Damn, you're built like a brick shithouse." Riza was very petite, half a head shorter than me, so you'd think she'd be used to everyone being bigger than her.
Liam, bless his cotton socks, laughed and put his hand out. "You must be Riza."
Riza took his hand, "yeah, mate, how's it going?" Liam stood aside to let her come in. She was hauling a massive makeup case, and Liam offered to take it for her. I thought she would bristle at his offer, but instead, she just gave it to him.
I raised my eyebrows and tilted my head, indicating my surprise. She just shrugged and gave me a strange look, and looked straight back at him. Riza is a pocket rocket type and prefers to be seen as one of the boys a lot of times. Andy even invited her to his bucks weekend despite her being my maid of honour, so the whole interaction was unusual.
Jen came in and introduced herself to Liam, and it was a much more civilised exchange than Riza's.
I gave them both hugs and kisses on the cheek. "Thanks for doing this, Jen and you too, Riza."
"No worries," Riza said.
Liam offered them both some wine and looked at me to see if I wanted one. I agreed, and we all sat in the lounge room.
Riza grabbed my hand when Liam had his back turned, "Sorry Lans, I think I got star struck. I'm a fucking dickhead."
Jen and I laughed at her, and I said, "serves you right for taking the piss out of me last night."
Liam came back with glasses and a bottle of white wine and poured us all a drink before taking a seat next to me. He sat next to me, resting his arm on the lounge behind me and put his ankle on his knee. His foot bounced, and I looked at him, and it struck me that he was anxious.
I put my hand on his foot to soothe him and turned to Riza and said, "did I tell you that Liam planned a trip to Mt Hotham this winter? I think it was June? Queens Birthday weekend? Before your Mum comes. Anyway, Riza, you spent a few winters there. Got any ideas for some good runs?"
That was it, the two of them talked about skiing, and the tension in the air lifted. I even swapped seats with Riza and sat with Jen for a bit. Once I could tell Liam and Riza were comfortable with each other, I asked Liam where Jen could set up.
Liam said to go to the master on the third, and he went to get up to take us there. I told him Jen, and I could be fine, and he smiled at me and kept talking to Riza. Jen and I smiled at each other and went up to get ready.
Part 19
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yuvon-writes-letters · 3 years ago
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Hey guys,
Yu, Rai and both Jakes.
Actually..If I talk about my feelings I'm pretty well. Don't tell Jake I said that, but I couldn't be happier about our situation. I mean, we can talk again. Without me being kidnapped and finding a weird Tumblr profile of him. (Which we think was a set up by one of the entities of my world since he obviously doesn't have one. Jake thinks it was goldies doing, I on the other hand don't believe that. Don't ask me why, but it feels like goldie wouldn't do that. And it didn't help me either but only made problems. I was distracted because I was writing the profile (you read it, right Yu? I don't know about the others) and angry. Like, really angry.)
Putting that aside, Jake called me, like he promised :) And it was the longest phone call I had for some time. Most of the time I talked and he didn't get distracted once, just listened to me and everything that happened. And then he started cursing, which is kind of understandable. He apologised for being into stasis. And for this other version from before the 'time setting back' thing. Because I don't find a name I'll call it TSB from now on.
The only problem I have now is going to work, I guess I'll take me some vacation...But at least I'm not as scared of the raven-ass anymore. I mean, I still am, but in the moment I know his steps. And I am not alone.
Jake, I intentionally write the next part in red, please don't read it. That's for Yu.
I know you think that Jake sees you as a threat. If it still is like you wrote in the letter. Jake knows that, too and he doesn't like it. You know him better than I do, of course, but without saying too much...I think it's quite the opposite. Talk to him about that. Even though it's probably not the best circumstances I think he enjoys being with you :)
The next part, purple (damn, I need more coloured pens), is for you Jake.
You already told me that you don't like that Yu thinks you see her as a threat. I only have to say one thing, if it still is like that, talk to her about it. Earlier than later.
The new thoughts about the blood ritual are really interesting. But please don't put yourself in this danger (or not, but I think it's understandable what I mean?) if it isn't necessary. But I also agree with Rai, I thought the same thing for a while. That you desired having someone, Jake, with you. It sounds plausible.
What more was there...Wait, let me reread the letters.
Oh yeah, Rai! One, till now my crow crew seems to still be in stasis (Jake realised that now, too) and two..Please try to take care of your health, yeah? I'm worried for you.
Lis🐾🔥
Ps. Damn...I'm writing this exactly when I wanted to leave the house (I mean, I sadly cannot hide my face forever).
Two new things...I got a message. I mean, it was a threat (because I am the obviously the bad girl that kidnapped Hannah), but I don't care. Maybe that means the stasis is slowly dissolving!
But number 2...I didn't get the vacation. My boss called me almost immediatly. "Under no circumstances [a word is blacked out] Liska. We have July and Alice, Tim and Jenny all want to take free time, too. You are one of our best workers and we can't afford you leaving now. You have no children so you have to wait. Also Max told me that you don't have any problems in family."
So long story short: He wants me to be there tomorrow. Argh, if he would pay me like he's talking that would awesome. And I'll kill Max when I see him next time. (My cousin that thought it was fun to try and steal my work so we both got the rank of 'one of the best workers'. The only problem: Max' title is official. -.- Overall, I'm so much more annoyed than some time earlier. Maybe I should ask Jake for help
Lis,
Okay, the Crow Crew drama is fading a bit, so I'll answer this now. Sorry if I seem disjointed at all, I'm probably going to be going back and forth from conversations to this letter a lot. I can't afford to have them all think I'm compromised, I need to focus on getting out of here and I don't want to deal with their pressure on top of everything else.
Yeah, I don't think the Tumblr profile was Goldie either. Goldie seems to try to be very much a "hands off" sort of entity, like my own. The Tumblr profile thing seems a little out of character for at least my Jake. At least, publicly answering your submission certainly was, though he may have panicked since you sent it in on anon and answered publicly without really thinking about it. I guess I could see him having a Tumblr profile for purposes of following people on social media and watching what they post, though. And then deciding he likes the media and posting a little bit of impersonal things that can't lead back to him. Probably my Jake will say something about that when I hand this letter over to him, stay tuned.
Yeah, I at least read some of the things you sent that profile, and I showed what I had to my Jake too. I'm not sure if I read all of it, since it was a bunch of printed-out screenshots in an envelope, but I read the ask where you told him you hated him (fair at that point but ouch that's got to have hurt) up to when you said you'd found Hannah. After that you sent me your letter telling me time had turned back and the Tumblr screenshots ended.
I'm glad you and Jake managed to talk things out. I was sort of worried about how he'd react, but it sounds like he took it pretty well, considering. I'm... not exactly sure he should be apologizing for the stasis, though. Or the TSB!Jake. Maybe especially not the TSB!Jake. Jakes seem to be oddly different from timeline to timeline, just based on what I've seen of them. TSB has been one of the most different so far.
Oh. One thing I should mention that you might not have seen from the profile: The MWAF used your phone to mock the TSB account, and mentioned that TSB wasn't the only person who could hack, and the MWAF blocked TSB from finding your location. Might want to warn your Jake about that.
A vacation sounds like a good idea :/ It's really hard to go back to normal life right after tragedies or trauma. It feels like the world keeps moving on and you're still stuck in place, and you just want to scream at them that they need to slow down, can't they see that the world is
Good. I'm glad you don't feel alone. It's easier to deal with this stuff when you're with someone else, even if it's not physically.
(Jake, my Jake I mean, if you're reading over my parts of these letters skip to the ||| now please.) I'm not saying he doesn't also enjoy my company. I can tell he does. That doesn't make me not a threat. Like how early on I suspected Thomas, but still thought he was a nice guy and enjoyed talking to him. (Obviously I don't suspect him any more XD ) Still, if you think I should talk with him about it, I'll try to find a tactful way to bring it up.
Yes, because obviously tact is my greatest strength. Sigh.
Like I said to Rai, the underlying desire thing is definitely possible. That'd either mean I'm more obvious about how I feel for Jake than I think I am (very possible, I'm not great at hiding how I feel in person) or the entity has some level of telepathy/mind reading. The reason is that chessboard. Since Jake likes chess, it's clear at least to me the entity expected him to come here at some point. I THINK, if the underlying desire thing is true, I can manipulate myself into wanting specific things by doing things like writing it over and over and repeating it out loud when doing the ritual, but I'm not sure.
|||
It's probably good that your Crow Crew is in stasis, like how it's objectively probably good my outside life is going on without me. Less drama, less pressure.
Huh. The harassment is definitely a promising sign. Maybe you should try contacting Darkness again, same way as I suggested near the beginning? That feels so long ago, but it really can't have been much more than a week, can it?
You... didn't get the vacation. Fucking hell. Is there ANY way you can convince your boss? You really should have time off. Maybe your Jake can help you come up with ideas.
Or at least maybe he can come up with a way to have your boss give you a bonus for your trouble -_-
Oh shit Cleo's interrogating me I'm gonna hand this to Jake now
(The handwriting changes to Jake's.) Hello, Lis.
I agree with Yuvon: "TSB" acts markedly different from myself. There would be no benefit from me promising to be there to find you in the moment, and indeed I would have been falling for a very transparent trap. Even in my possible state of panic, I cannot see myself being there physically, much less revealing myself physically to authorities in the process, unless I was playing the role of bait in a counter-trap. While it is plausible that this was TSB's plan, TSB gave no indication that Yuvon or I could tell that this was the case. Of course, I would have done my best to be there physically in the aftermath of the kidnapping, but not in the moment.
I also agree that the Tumblr profile seems to be out of character for both myself and for "Goldie", though I hesitate to judge TSB's actions by what I myself would do. I seem to vary in surprising ways across universes and even from timeline to timeline, based solely on your current Jake's reactions thus far. I do actually own a Tumblr profile for the exclusive purpose of following social medias I wish to track, but I used a random username generator website for the username and not my own name, and I certainly never posted anything.
The news about the MWAF being able to hack is new to me; I must have missed that the first time I read through the screenshots. That is quite troubling. I suppose I will need to be more careful in future.
I am sincerely sorry your request for a vacation was rejected. I do not know how much you intend to separate your personal life and the Duskwood case, but if your stasis is truly wavering, you may be able to reveal some measure of the danger you are in to convince him to let you flee the area for a small while. Especially since you mentioned in your Tumblr post that you saw a raven note in your wor
Oh.
You need to leave that place. Now. Do not inform your employer of the danger you are in, reveal nothing to him or to anyone, take unpaid time off if you need to. Get your cousin and anyone else you care overly much about out of there too. Invalidate any information you can your employer or coworkers knows about you. Do not tell the truth to anyone, even your cousin. Make up any excuses you need to, ask your Jake for help with ideas if you need to. You may also wish to check that the coworkers your boss listed who are going on vacation are ACTUALLY going on vacation.
This is a priority, Liska. You need to tell your Jake all of this too, especially the part with the note in your workplace. You need to get out of there.
Good luck.
—Jake & Yuvon
(The letter tucks itself into the paper clip with the others.)
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sewertour · 5 years ago
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Note: I wrote this exactly 6 years and am bringing it back, since I just got back from my 2019 cruise (page count: 0!)
Writing Workshop at Sea for One or My New Expensive Hobby
I am a terrible writer.
Not that my syntax is any more clunky, my stories any less interesting or my prose as equally tortured than the average scribe's, but my writing frequency is infrequently fecund. For me, writing is hard. And after years of wall staring self-analysis, I've decided my troubles stem from the fact that the very act of writing makes me think. Hard. Very very hard.
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And since thinking hurts my brain, and my brain does not enjoy painful experiences, spends time focusing me on other cognitive tasks that have more immediate rewards, like reading an email, eating a pint of ice cream or staring into a middle distance thinking about all the awesome things you could be doing. When I finally make the effort to concentrate on writing, I start by planning to write.
There are all kinds of plans to make. There's different medium to mediate, places to pontificate, and scuttlebutt to schedule. And by the time that's settled, I'm suddenly hungry and have to deal with that crisis immediately. Before scratching no more than a few words, I suddenly have the urge to check my phone which reminds me that it's essential I watch TV. Then the day's over and I start to despair my lack of word count, but there's always tomorrow and tomorrow.
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So for 2013 I decided that I was going to spend a big chunk of my work vacation time leading the romantic life of a non-professional writer. This way, I wouldn't have to hole up in a dank garret worrying about where I was going to get my next bottle of MD 20/20, or worry about any distractions at all except for the glow of the blank page.
Unfortunately, I knew holing up at home wouldn't work. First off, there would be too many distractions and besides, it wasn't working now on evenings and weekends, so why would it if I had a whole week or two? I needed to go on more than a metaphysical writer's journey, I needed a place to unhook from reality, and the Internet. I'm really bad about the Internet.
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My first thought was to book time at a writer's colony in the mountains. Away from the internet and worldly distractions is traditional, but a quick search on the internet revealed a sad truth. Not only were these retreats expensive, but for some of them I would not only have to do some cooking and cleaning, but listen to other people's touchy-feely paper revelations and talk about how it made me feel. Ugh.
Maybe I just need to find a cheap hotel that feeds me whenever I want. What about Vegas? Still too distracting for me. But what if you took a vegas-style hotel, leached it of all hope and placed it somewhere far from the prying hands of a national government and the internet? That would be a writer's paradise. And that would be a cruise ship.
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It's a jail cell without the shivving - a monastery without the religion - a lonely shack surrounded by nature, but with a doctor on standby. There would be an unsuspecting audience for my karaoke and an ever present army to prepare my snacks 24 hours a day. And if you're willing to take the least popular routes available, all of this can be yours for a very low, low price.
To many people, a cruise is synonymous with fun. There's a certain appeal to sitting around all day by a pool, eating at the buffet, and then at night soaking up all the bountiful light entertainment. But it's not really for me. Distraction-free living is like a form of prison and makes me anxious. That's why I have a smartphone. But on a cruise, where the internet comes at a Great Cost - around 75 cents a minute unless you get it in bulk - I'll only have writing to keep me entertained. Or I'll go crazy.
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So here I am, in the middle of the ocean writing this thing you're reading instead of watching a movie, cruising Twitter or attending a comedy hypnotist show that bills itself as one of the greatest in the world. But there may be time for that on the ship tomorrow. It's a whole day at sea and my head is already pounding like crazy just anticipating typing more of this out.
And so far, I've not only managed to knock out a few pages, contemplated throwing myself overboard and seen a few places along the way, but I lost 14 lbs. (It may have more to do with the endless pacing from anxiety than healthful living, but I'll take it.)
Want to lose weight, make friends, combat Internet addiction and writer's block? Form your own Workshop at Sea! Or better yet, pay me to make your writing dreams come true and I'll organize a bunch of you to come on a boat with me and tell each other our mediocre scribblings are, 'On the Write Track'? Because after spending nearly a month at sea, guru-ing seems like a more fun than struggling with this stuff alone, finally freeing me to enjoy myself by the pool until that drives me crazy too.
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