#but he was lowkey loaded

[pookiepiss69]

Whenever I drink anything alcoholic I feel like my dad and get the urge to beat my family

[boarloved-art]

Wei Wuxian should be able to get drunk for once. I think he'd either be singing bawdy drinking songs on the roof of the Jingshi or he'd be getting irrevocably lost no matter where he is. He's found in the bushes behind the mountains like a cryptid, and then he's like "I can't believe you all got lost" (extremely slurred) as if he didn't get embarrassed by something Lan Wangji had said and just somehow disappeared when everyone looked back at him

oh ABSOLUTELY im walking with u and nodding and agreeing, i can see him becoming an absolute menace to keep track of at his drunkest.

anyway heres wonderwall The Gang (Wangxian & their fave group of ducklings) in a city known for its STRONG wine and wuxian being like well. ur all grown now, youre technically not juniors anymore. we have to see whos lasting the longest against this stuff!, smash cut to a suspiciously wei ying-less group of the worlds drunkest cultivators being wrangled through the woods by designated driver hanguang-jun, with at least 2 of them clinging to his robes at all times.

[triglycercule]

can the mtt commit more crimes that just murder please i know theyre the MURDER time trio but ppppleasse,,,, please,,,,,,

they'd be terrible to be next to on the highway. horror's going 160 mph amd has long past gone over the speed limit. dust's out for BLOOD and by blood i mean your tires. he's somehow sniping those round rubber wheels from the high moving vehicle with the precision of a master fruit ninja player. if your car explodes or flips over in the process that's not his fault. and then to make matters worse for everyone on the highway killer's in the backseat scratching up the doors and windows of your car with a knife everytime horror gets close to another car and oops he accidentally just disfigured your face also did i mention theyre all drunk during this

ok so theyve all got the classic face WHY DONT THEY ABUSE IT!!!! horror gets to do a little paper mache to cover up his head hole and then wearing glasses. killer i dont know what the FUCK he can do to get rid of his perpetual tears but let's just pretend that theyre conveniently gone for now. and then all dust has to do is put down his hood! anyways identity theft is cool. imagine how much they could totally fuck up classic's reputation with this. set up fake tinder profiles and then scam people for their credit card info/free dates (while ordering every expensive thing) and stealing wallets. walking into various grillby's's around the multiverse and telling terrible jokes. like ACTUALLY bad jokes. and then of course just being a huge piece of shit at the bar. god theres so many things they could do pretending to be classic. which one of us is hikaru looking ahh except the only difference between the three is the color of the stains on their clothes (either gray (dust) black (killer) or red. well faded red (horror))

ROBBERY!!!! ROBBERIES PLURAL!!!??? train robbery gas station robbery bank robbery GOVERNMENT robbery (what would you rob the government for?? documents??? idk) anyways. mtt robbing a train except its just a really shitty plan and they dont know jackshit about what theyre doing. killer's taken over the conductor's cabin and now he is booking it. how fast are trains allowed to go idk but the maximum. anyways meanwhile horror's on the tracks fucking up the rails with his strength or whatever (listen i know he's weak but picking and choosing what hcs i believe in is my art) and dust is there to teleport him away before the train crashes into him and turns him into a trolley problem victim. and then of course that shit doesnt fucking work and the train just ends up flipping over and catching on fire or something (killer survives because of course he does he's killer). and then in the end dust just has to flip the entire train over and they just stroll into the part that actually HAS the money

and then they go out and get ice cream. sometimes the murderers need to take a break from murdering and just do NORMAL crime yk???

[arsonisticartichokes]

Sad 3AM MHA thoughts: Izuku in his second and third year sitting on the sidelines having to sadly watch all his friends participate in the yearly sports festival while not getting involved himself cause he doesn't wanna use up any of his remaining embers aodnsobdeksjos

[papa-evershed]

Chef Daniel 👨‍🍳 THE INHERITANCE

[bethrnoora]

new oc. julian ayer, my guy who sucks real bad. his pinterest board is rancid but you already knew that

additional doodle of him as jigsaw's little helper bc he would be so good at it and he needs enrichment or else he gets bored and irritable

[foxscarf]

13 - 14.11.23

Work was pretty easygoing today and yesterday, I've been retrying a troublesome cloning process several times but not feeling overly frustrated about it; and I think we might be getting to the bottom of the problem now. The main thing is my boyfriend has been visiting over the weekend and until this morning, so I wasn't feeling very bothered about work! I think that's probably a good thing actually. Being in a new city means my life outside of work can feel a bit small still, so it's so good to have someone familiar around to energise me and fill up all my free time so it counterbalances the work, and make me extra motivated to get home and get on with what feels like the best/more important way to spend time! ❤️

27/100 days of productivity

[blooming-cecilia]

im sorry but. as much as i love itto (and i really, really do), im really not happy to see him again this time. he just had his beetle event a couple patches ago and had his cameo in the cooking event. and now hes getting yet ANOTHER event? they're doing it on purpose now and forcing him in just for a lighthearted event... there's literally so many other ways to make a lighthearted event for inazuma that focuses on another character. they have over 50 characters at this point and many of those are underdeveloped and don't have their own story quests or hangouts to really expand on their stories,,

if they can't afford to develop or expand their characters atm then just don't have this event? a new area, a character, TWO new story quests and some more mini events is more than enough for a patch

[getoutbalded]

My (DEAD) aunts ex husband is spending TWO nights at our place (aka cannot in piece cook in the kitchen for two fucking days) and im going to the match tomorrow with my MOM (oh god) and some 15 yr old croatian boy i KNOOOOW ill share awkward silences with.... Pleaseeeeeee save me sb just save meeeee

[skitskatdacat63]

Watching the Brawn docu has me wanting to reach through the screen to choke out Christian and Montezemolo

[grismavessel]

Gris in a letterman jacket

My hand slipped and I drew this because I had holographic colors on the brain

i LOVE letterman jackets because its a cozy but stylish little jacket sweater!!

Alola rarely gets cold enough for Gris to wear thick jackets so a letterman makes sense (i have a Ingo and Gris drawing in the works with the both of them twinning so keep an eye out for that :3)

also

I think Gris would just load up a ton of pins to the back of the jacket because

1. Gris needs to customize the hell of out everything :3

2. It creates lightweight armor for their back, but it comes with the on of when they'll eventually trip and fall, if they fall on their back it's potential a ton of tiny little pins jabbing at them.

3. It just adds even more style >:3 (also I keep thinking that he'd just purposely move around a lot just to hear the sound of the pins clacking together)

[eggs-can-draw]

THISE ARE TOO SEPARATE ONES LMAO

But you picked it so you get it>:) first up is

SHUICHIS LOST ALLIGATOR CASE now in cannon I think from a interview or something ( dont look up you’ll 100% get spoiled) it’s confirmed that shuichis first case was an alligator case

When he was a kid his class mate asked him to find her lost pet, not a dog or cat but an alligator, and so it’s exsplain ex that shuichi does a bunch of research on alligators and behaviors of them and gets gear to catch it and he does and returns it back to the girl and it’s one of his proud eat moments

But like imagine she lost it at school and it took a few days for shuichi to prepare and to catch it and he doesn’t tell anybody because he want to be a good detective and do it on his own

Now imagine being his parents getting called to the school because there has been a situation with shuichi and so you rush there and meet your partners at the front s and rush in to see shuichi in the principals office with a girl and hers parents holding an alligator

Then having the situation told to you and they just slowly turn to kirigiri

Also poor little man got detention for not tell a teacher☹️

Kirigiri totally gets Shuichi ice cream on the way home for solving the case (she is so so so ]proud of her little detective look at him go) ALSO that is a fucking hilarious first case oh my god

ALSO ALSO oh my god imagine how panicked Togami would be. Like Naegi and Kirigiri are also relatively panicked but also understand that 'Yeah somethign terrible could have happened but for all we know Shuichi could have lost his backpack or something it probably isnt that big" Im imaginig he is mid meeting or something. His assistant walks in quietly and hands him his phone. he just sees a text in the Parent Group Chat tm from Kirigiri saying that something happened at school and they're needed. The meeting is cancelled mid meeting. Togami literally cannot get himself to HPES faster. Mans very heavily considers taking a helicopter but is talked out of it.

They all get there, Togami is lowkey out of breath from panicking, they spend a few minutes calming him down "Hey it's probably not a big deal I'm sure Shu is ok" "It's ok 'kuya he probably just lost his jacket or something" AND THEN THEY WALK IN TO FIND A FUCKING ALLIGATOR

[orcelito]

i really am so obsessed with how Double Agent Midvalley is gonna change the vibes with Wolfwood too. like Midvalley and Wolfwood ALREADY have some vibes due to their fight(s) in the manga. but now theyre both double agents but in different directions. two Relatively normal guys who wanted nothing to do with this battle between the angels & are STUCK HERE

also imagining that spiderman meme if/when they ever find out about each other lmfao. like what do you MEAN youre a double agent too?!? what do you MEAN!!!! IT'S FOR HIM!!!!!!!!!!??!?

Yeah.

[todayisafridaynight]

Ok I was loading the dishwasher and had the dumbest idea, hear me out. Yanno that vine that is the kid running around the pool, and the person is like "what do you have" and the kid is like "a knife!" and the adult is like "NO!" ? That but Daigo and Mine, and someone just insulted Daigo. Or something. Basically Mine being gleefully violent and Daigo being very concerned/distressed XD

they're the epitome of that simpsons screenshot fuckin Please Don't Kill For Me

[unamused-kookaburra]

Also I'm getting my first independent patient load tomorrow so please pray for me

[d3vilcvntz]

(top male reader x older bottom character)

being a sugar baby to an older man but you're the top >>>

you're so much younger and so much smaller than him. he's literally towering above you whenever you guys are together. people will always assume that he's the top in your relationship.

you are not even struggling with money, you're doing this just because you can. i mean, who doesn't want a handsome man taking care of you and pampering you with money everyday ?

you met him when you were scrolling through a dating app, seeing his profile that barely shows his face. he did messaged you first, asking to meet up if you're free and you agreed. you lowkey expected someone ugly to come but you don't even care at this point, anything for a thousand dollars i guess. you were so glad that you were wrong when you actually saw him face to face. for someone his age, he's really attractive.

you guys constantly meet up after that, just going on dates anytime you're both free. he paid for everything though, you did offered to pay sometimes but he always refused it. it was just casual until you both went drinking one day, getting so drunk that he ended up getting pounded by you that night. you were scared that everything will end here and you'll never see him again

but the next day, he offered you a position. you'll be his personal dildo and he'll pamper you with money everyday. this is like the best offer you've ever received. sex with someone as attractive as him and getting paid at the same time ? fuck yeah

at this point, most of your friends knew about this relationship as you literally started wearing expensive clothes and saying that you're busy anytime your friends asked to hangout. they sometimes asked the reasons why you can't hangout with them and you'll just says that you have something important to do at night. you weren't exactly lying though

pushing his head into the pillow, grabbing his hips so roughly that it leave marks behind. his hole tightly clamped into your cock, you leaned closer to him "it's so funny how everyone think you're the top" you whispered to his ear "when you're literally getting fucked like a whore everynight" you continued, pulling your cock out of his hole.

he turns to look at you right away, whimpering, feeling empty as his hole clenched on nothing "please...don't pull it out" he begged so sweetly, tears running down his face. you smiled at him, grabbing his arm to turned his body to you so you can see him completely. it caught him off guard as you'll always do it from behind "i wanna see your face while i ruined you tonight" you said, your hand reached out and touched his face, wiping his tears away. leaning towards him to kiss his swollen lips

you slide your cock inside of him again, pulling away from the kiss and slowly speeding up your pace. his hands grabbed the sheets, mouth agape with sweets sounds coming out of it. his poor useless cock bouncing everytime you thrusts into him, just leaking precum all over his stomach "i..want to- ah! cum.. i want to cum~!" he repeated, looking at your face for approval. you smiled at him, nodding your head as your hand reached out to touch his cock. teasing the tip before pumping it roughly

he came first, his eyes roll back as the white liquid spurt all over his stomach and your hand. you slammed your cock so deep inside of him as you release your load in him.

falling asleep and waking up the next day to him being gone from your side. only leaving money on the nightstand. you sighed and took the money. sitting on the edge of the bed, getting ready to go through your day like usual. dont worry, you'll see him again tonight.